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kiwanopie · 2 years

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The Cat dilemma

“You see this? Ma’ niece sent me this.”

Kiyoomi doesn’t have enough time to dodge the phone shoved in his face before he’s unwittingly victim to some way-too-loud Tiktok video Atsumu’s showing him on his way-too-cracked screen. Some viral meme played under a nightcore rendition of a song too mainstream for him to stomach. But from what he can tell it’s about a cat on a ledge who misses his mark to the next one and smacks its little orange chin on it in the process.

He rolls his eyes before shouldering his friend off. “Jesus, take better care of your stuff.”

Atsumu pouts at him before glancing at his phone a little curiously. “You know I dropped it when ya - Hey, did ya see the video at least?!”

In lieu of responding, Kiyoomi grumbles a little before shutting the locker room door behind him.

Stupid.

It isn’t until the drive home that he even thinks about it again. When his Bluetooth doesn’t connect immediately and the radio starts to play instead. It’s that song again. Not as sped up definitely but he’d know that cookie cutter viral pop song bass and tremble anywhere. It’s stupid how stuff like that gets popular nowadays. Like any sane person can sit up and listen to something like this. But then he remembers that kids exist and they listen to stupid music and intake stupid media and definitely share stupid memes that no sane person would find funny.

Like that stupid cat video.

Kiyoomi turns on his blinker as he merges down the road leading home. Who would even laugh at something like that. Cats do silly shit all the time and you don’t see him blowing a gasket over it. Even if it did kind of hit that ledge at a funky angle. - I mean, it couldn’t have gotten hurt or anything but it… it did make a little glunk! didn’t it…

Kiyoomi purses his lips as pulls into the lot. Okay, so it was a little funny…

You’re the first thing he sees when he steps into his shared apartment.

He bends to let you pull him into a welcome home kiss as he kicks the door closed behind him. Little whispers of apple and honey blending into the strong lemony smell of his shower gel - and it makes him all warm and gooey inside that you’ve made yourself so at home in his absence. He hums as you greet him. Bends for another kiss when you tell him you missed him and pinches you a little on your side when you tease him for being a sap. There’s a knot in his shoulders that he didn’t notice was there that melts away the moment you get your hands on him. And for a moment he forgets about the whole cat dilemma.

Until, “Oh! By the way baby, your sister stopped by to drop off Salmon. Said you’d babysit him while she’s in Ueno with your mother.”

Kiyoomi groans as he shleps himself into the kitchen. He did not give her the O.K. to do that. In fact, he distinctly remembers telling her that No, I’m not going to babysit your stupid cat while you’re out with mom. And Yes, if you drop him off at my apartment anyway, I’m going to tell the people at the front desk you’re a stalker and to call the police next time.

He sighs when he finds the feline in question perched up on his kitchen counter.

“Damn it… Salmon, how many times have I told you not to-“

Oh, he must’ve spooked him.

Because without even a second to prep his little orange legs to jump, he lifts off of the first counter right to the ledge leading to the first floor steps. A clumsy little rocket ship form that kicks his legs lamely behind him, and right as he gets to the edge he’s aiming for - He falls short.

He knicks his little chin with a soft glunk!

It’s not even a second later that you find Kiyoomi doubled over a bathing Salmon, coughing his way through a giggle fit.

#no cats were harmed in the making of this drabble #this might belong to a boyfriend!kiyoomi series I’ve been considering #so #boyfriend!kiyoomi #sakusa kiyoomi x reader #sakusa kiyoomi #haikyuu sakusa #hq sakusa #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu!!#hq x reader #haikyuu fluff #hq crack

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nonsubstantial · 21 days

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MARCH 2024 DIARY POST

I'm keeping up the habit of writing a monthly post to catalogue all the things I've been obsessed with in 2024. At the end of the year, I want to be able to look back and remember what was making me happy all year long! If you are reading this, I hope you will enjoy hearing about these things or checking them out too! First, a chaotic collage of those things!

VIDEO GAME: As you may already know, Splatoon is probably my favorite video game franchise of all time. I really cannot overstate how important it is to me. Naturally, I was highly anticipating its new singleplayer DLC, titled Side Order, but when it finally came out at the end of February, my elbow was fractured in a way that made it painful for me to play. So, I had to wait until about a week into March for my elbow to heal a little. Then, I spent about 10 hours obsessively playing it, and I loved pretty much every second of it. It featured by far the most difficult levels ever seen in a Splatoon game, which was a treat to me as a player who was disappointed by the rather simplistic story mode of the base game. Splatoon 3: Side Order took the form of a roguelite battle tower, similar to Salmon Run but with new enemies, unique (and sometimes puzzling) stages, and customizable weapon builds. Even players who find it a bit too challenging at first can eventually mod the difficulty to an extent that (hopefully) makes it doable. The story was nothing crazy, but the gameplay and visuals were so unbelievably good that I honestly wished I could erase it all from my mind and play it again from the start. Just yay 💕, I love Splatoon so much.

TWITCH STREAM FAN EDIT: If you don't already know who Jerma is, he is a prolific video game streamer that I became a big fan of a few years ago. His unique humor has consistently impressed and appealed to me, and his fan community has proven itself to be both creative enough and motivated enough to persistently churn out edited “best of” versions of his streams. For better or for worse, Jerma announced his retirement from streaming last year, leaving his eager fans with nothing but his earlier content to dredge for, well… content. One such fan edit that was released this year, post-retirement, was a massive compilation of all his Nancy Drew playthroughs (save for one). This edit in particular was one that I found overwhelmingly funny and good, and it inspired an ongoing fanfic that I’m still currently working on writing. Oddly enough, watching this caused a domino effect that got me back into writing in general and has given me the surge of confidence and inspiration that I needed to keep working on creating the fiction that has lived inside in my head for years. I really hope this feeling never dies. You can watch the stream that inspired me, linked here!

MUSICAL ARTIST: Peach Kelli Pop is probably tied (with a few other artists) for the title of my favorite band of all time. Their entire discography is only about 2 hours long, but they were still my most listened to artist for several years in a row. It’s due to the consistency of the vibe across all of her work: upbeat and positive while still delivering a profound emotional impact. I've been able to just listen her entire catalog of music over and over and over again on shuffle. I might describe it as DIY rock, or feminist punk, and if you haven't heard it before, Gentle Leader is probably the best album to start with. Listen here!

MUSICAL ARTIST: After listening to nothing except Peach Kelli Pop for about a week straight, I started to look into similar bands that I hadn't already checked out and found one that really caught my interest. That's how I was introduced to Tacocat! Their band name is both a palindrome and euphemism, and their album Lost Time was love at first listen. They have cozy lyrics about aliens, birth control, and creating your own values, and their music has left me in a good mood every time I've thrown it on. You can listen to the first song that I heard, linked here!

SONG: It's Don’t Rain On My Parade, by Barbra Streisand!! I still haven't watched the musical that this song is from, but the drag queen Plasma mentioned it on RuPaul Season 16, which is how I ended up hearing it. This song gets an individual mention because I was absolutely blown away by this one individual track! It's brilliant and catchy right out of the gate, "Life's candy and the sun's a ball of butter! Don't bring around a cloud to rain on my parade!" It's from 1964, but its recording sounds crystal clear and it channels its intended emotions perfectly. I felt compelled to listen to it over and over again, because it really is just so cheerful and artistically inspiring. I feel like it's a perfect piece of music. Listen here!

SONG: I have to give another song an individual mention! It's Mood Indigo, by Nina Simone!! I’ve been a big fan of Nina Simone for years now, but more often than not, I've stuck to my favorite album, Pastel Blues. I did branch out and listen to this song a few times in the past, but it only recently dawned on me just how perfect it is. Wikipedia says that it was recorded in 1964, about the same time as Don’t Rain On My Parade, and while it's technically a cover of an old Duke Ellington song, Nina Simone’s version has a totally unique vibe, evident from the first few bars. Its lyrics are meant to be cathartic, as they discuss suicidal ideation, while the drums, bass, and piano create a beautiful and upbeat swing melody that perfectly juxtaposes and rebuts the content of Nina’s vocals. It's menacing, catchy, uplifting, and truly perfect! I now believe it to be a landmark in Nina Simone’s career, and the whole of music history in general. Listen here!

MUSICAL ARTIST: Okay, one last music rec, I swear!! I was really feeling the vibes this month (but mostly just listening to bands that I already know and love). Along with Peach Kelli Pop, another one of my favorite bands is King Gizzard & The Lizard Wizard. Ever since 2017 (aka, the year of the gizz) they have probably reigned supreme as my #1 most listened to band. They just have so much music, with so much variation, that I can usually find at least one of their songs that appeals to me. Since the start of this year, I've been collecting and organizing a playlist of my favorite songs by them, titled 31 Days Of Gizz. Not for any particular reason, but just because I find it fun to make lists! At the last minute, I decided that I would organize the songs, specifically in the way that I would play them if I were introducing someone new to the band. So, if you haven’t heard their music before, maybe it’s time I introduced you? But no pressure, I just like their songs and I made my playlist just for me! I'm linking to it on spotify, HERE, if you’re interested! (forgot to put this one on the collage, lol)

VIDEO GAME: Right before the month ended, I bought the new fantasy tactics game, Unicorn Overlord, and I am fucking in love. I’ve been a longtime fan of the fantasy tactics genre, so as soon as this game started making waves, I begrudgingly accepted that I HAD to play it. I really don’t have a lot of time in between trying to take care of things at home and working on my writing, as I mentioned before, but I briefly dropped all my other hobbies and managed to fit about 10 hours of gameplay in before the month ended. I really wish I had time to obsess over it, because I feel like it is a masterpiece, even if the rumors about there being gay content ended up being a disappointing exaggeration (the game was developed by Vanillaware, but was published by homophobic giants ATLUS and SEGA, so I’m not surprised). Despite the story being pretty much dog shit though, I believe the gameplay is damn near perfect, and even revolutionary within its genre. I’ll probably be sinking all my game time into it until the new Elden Ring DLC drops. If you’re a person who also likes fantasy tactics, then I highly recommend playing it (I got it for the Nintendo Switch, where it seems to run perfectly).

(that’s it. It is now APRIL!! There might be some repeats this next month, or I'll leave them out... we'll see. Hope you have a good day! ♡)

#personal #2024 reviews #2024 #march #splatoon #jerma #peach kelli pop #tacocat #don't rain on my parade #mood indigo #king gizzard #unicorn overlord

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solitude4chiron · 11 months

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II. Love Story

Hobie Brown x Black reader ⚠️: Angst, lots of cussing, arguments & crying

It had been a week since you met hobie and he was definitely a character. You both saw each other everyday because he hated texting or calling, so anytime he had a little story or theory, he was right at your door.

“C’monn babe open up” he said knocking at the door

“We’re not dating hobie” you said rolling your eyes and unlocking the door “if we were dating you would have a key”

“Why ya leading me on? I’ve came over almost every day let me stay the night”

And he was right, he did come over every day. He taught you how to play guitar while sitting on his lap. You taught him how to make homemade pizza, shared playlists, played video games. Overall you didn’t mind his company at all, you loved making him annoyed and desperate for you, plus living alone wasn’t the best thing ever.

“Ok hobie you can stay” you said grabbing him by the front of his shirt and bringing him into your room to change “I’ve got some shorts and a graphic tee just throw that on and meet me in the kitchen”

“You don’t want to stay and watch?” He smirked while unbuckling his studded belt

“No I don’t want to stay and watch weird ass nga” you laughed slamming the door on your way out. The way he was so bold made your stomach flutter for hours, and the way he brushed his words off so easily was crazier to you.

For lunch you made some salmon and rice, sure that hobie had never had before. You went to the tv and turned on some music, turning it up just loud enough for you to hear in the kitchen while zoning out over the stove. After a few minutes you felt two huge hands wrapping around your waist from behind and hobie was bent down over you, resting his head in the crook of your neck.

“Thanks for the hospitality luv”

“Bro we don’t date hobie stop callin me pet names nd shi” you said slightly smiling

“Rude but ok.. I see the way you stare at me y/n, the way you wish you were bold enough to say what you wanted. Man I can’t fuckin wait” he said pressing you closer to him then letting go quickly to walk back inside your room.

You immediately texted your friends about what he said, your heart jumping out your shirt to the point where it was painful.

“Y’all this man is in love with me istg”

“Ouu what he say now”

“He keeps grabbing me by the waist and dirty talking 🙄 I can’t even play hard to get anymore he’s so finee”

“and I can’t even get a text back ts is insane 🤦🏾‍♀️🤦🏾‍♀️”

You finished up cooking and invited hobie into the living room to eat and talk. “Hobie!! Come eat” after calling his name loudly a few times you walked over to the room. Surprisingly he was on the phone, surprisingly it was a girl. Your demeanor and mood dropped as you listened through the loose hinges. About to drop your “almost boyfriend’s” plate on the floor from your body going weak. Still you listened.

“Yeah I’ll see you later on, maybe I’ll try to get out while she’s sleeping”

“Your too caught up with her hobie, if it becomes a problem I’ll have to get miles.”

“Okay sorry, I’ll be there” He said hanging up the phone

You placed the plate on the floor in front of the room and locked yourself in the bathroom, rocking back and forth with your knees to your chest. By the time hobie came out the room and saw his plate on the floor, but no you, he started looking around the house.

“Y/n ! Piss off it’s not funny anymore” he shouted while you tried to cover your own mouth with your hands and silence your cry’s and sniffles as he walked past

After a minute he did realize you were in the bathroom and tried to open it as quick as possible to get to you. Likewise you were scrambling to clean up the tears on your face before he came in.

“Cmon babe what’s wrong?” He said cupping your face and squatting down to you on the floor noticing your eyes were bloodshot red

“Hobie stop calling me out my name, that shits weird, get the fuck out my house” you snapped at him pushing him away from you

“What did I do? I have less than a clue at the moment can you communicate love?”

“Save that “love”shit for the girl on the phone and get the fuck out my house hobie. I can’t fucking believe you right now.” You said getting up to throw his guitar and clothes out in a pile in front of your apartment

“Y/n it’s not like that cmonnn. She’s a friend, she’s like me, a spider person. We’re just chatting about work” he said trying to run his fingers through your locs

“Hobie you said you were going to sneak out while I was sleeping. If it was spider stuff you could have just told me. Just get out.” You responded pushing him through the doorframe with the rest of his belongings and locking the door. You sunk to the floor crying with your back pressed against the door, and you could hear hobie. Banging and trying to convince you there was nothing going on, but after a few minutes the banging got quieter and footsteps descended down the hall

The best thing you could do was sleep, so you slipped on your bonnet and got in bed. You woke up from your midday nap hearing a guitar strumming your favorite song. Your room was dark and candle lit, you also could smell take out in the kitchen. You hung your head over the bed to see hobie strumming away on his guitar, soft enough to give you some nice sleeping music. His long fingers ran across the strings so lovingly, almost like if he applied too much pressure the guitar would get hurt. In that moment all you had was love for him, but it quickly went away when you remembered what he did.

“Why are you in my house hobie im bout to call the police”

“You said if we were dating I’d have a key, you also look cute when your sleeping”

“Get the fuck out hobie, what do I have to do beat your ass?”

“Ehh I wouldn’t mind” he shrugged “I wanted to say sorry, I don’t do this relationship stuff too well but I know your mad. Let’s just eat I got you some food” he said carrying you half awake on his back to the couch.

“I didn’t want to sneak out y/n, I was going to a spider society meeting and I didn’t want to wake you up when I left y’kno? Just leave and come back with breakfast for when you woke up”

“Well why did she say we were getting too serious and caught up?”

“Because.. I don’t know. She’s a little broken right now. No one to lean on. I promise Gwen isn’t a problem love. Can you trust me?” he said looking down at his plate and moving his fork around his food.

“Okay hobie. I love you.” You responded and it was almost like the words spilt out your mouth, you never had love like this before and honestly you didn’t want to throw it away over something you didn’t know was true or not. Also your boyfriends literally a superhero, so there’s a lot surrounding that.

Instantly his head jumped up from his food “love you too, I’m sorry.” He responded before hugging you tightly, almost like he was afraid to lose something he never really had.

“yes you can stay the night” you said rolling your eyes and kissing him all over the cheek

“Let’s go back to bed, you want apology sex right?”

You slapped him on the back of the head “Stop before I take what I said back” while you both continued eating and laughing at each other’s sarcasm.

Everything about this man screamed love to you.

So you shouted love back.

#hobie brown x reader #hobie brown #hobie spiderverse #atsv hobie #hobie brown x black reader #black reader #black writers #spider punk x reader #spider punk

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seffien · 1 year

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okay. i know this is a lot of things highlighted and I had more but these ones I was the most clueless about and very curious ???!!!!???? color pulse in Octo expansion bad ending I am most curious bout

again. sorry i highlighted a lot I just… gotta absorb the sploon information I gotta

no problem

'when i die i want my team to lower me into my grave so they can let me down one last time' - a popular meme/miiverse post in the community complaining about teammates. it resonates with me.

'octo-kraken' - if one were to hack themselves to be an octoling and use the kraken special, the lower tentacles of the kraken would be curly!

'4 and 8 in rotm' - concept art in the artbook shows that 4 and 8 were supposed to make a return in 3's story mode but, for whatever reason, didn't. i guess the idea was scrapped, which is super unfortunate

splatoon tumblr disappearance and octo oven origins

'do not go in' - in the music that plays after the blender is completed, speaking can be heard. in reality, it's a new years countdown played backwards, but it sounds like 'do not go in', which is really, really eerie

'toni kensa identity' - there's an interview out there with the guy himself, but we still don't know much about him. we just know that he's an inkling and, well, a he.

'great zapfish flying' - sometimes, when you'd boot up the game or leave the lobby, the great zapfish would fly around the lobby and make its funny little noise. in splatoon 3, though, the zapfish is seemingly completely stationary.

'pearl's electrocution' - apparently, pearl was electrocuted when she blew out the speakers at that singing contest, was electrocuted in the process, and had her growth stunted. ...or at least, she would've, if that info wasn't just a mistranslation. at least i think it is. im very profressional.

'glenna' - an alternate name for paruko/harmony before her actual name was revealed. i have 0 idea where it came from, but it was used in the siivagunner community since she was called that in the KFAD (king for a day) tournament.

'rocket announcements' <- click for more info, although it does kinda contain splatoon 3 spoilers. i find this super creepy because...uh...

'bisk's girlfriend' - the 6th sunken scroll in splatoon 2 features bisk embracing another spider crab in a dress, confirmed in a developer interview to be his ex-girlfriend. i guess i can remove that question mark now.

'koloktos' - from the trivia section of museum d'alfonsio's inkipedia page: These laughter sounds have been present in other Nintendo games, such as upon defeating the boss Koloktos in The Legend of Zelda: Skyward Sword.

'sentient idols' - not only do the idols sometimes break the fourth wall for comedic effect, but from another interview: ...it just might be that during those moments of Splatfest, they may have an occasional inkling that they are characters in some sort of a virtual space in the world of a video game.

'no.9'

'color pulse in octo expansion bad ending' - in the bad ending of octo expansion, a faint melody can be heard during the cutscene that plays. turns out, its a broken reprise of color pulse. there is a video, but i'm not going to link it because i want to sleep tonight and i imagine you do too.

judd mask - unused piece of gear that, strangely enough, appears in splatoon 2's salmon run employee handbook

'inklings on the moon' - in splatoon 2 (idk if its visible in 3), the moon is sometimes visible, and apparently, people saw that there was a little squid mark on it, leading to theories that inklings went to the moon before. here's a fun little video from rizirone covering the theory.

#splatoon #splatoon 2 #splatoon 3 #asksef

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birdsong-18 · 2 years

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empires smp first impressions!

video: Empires SMP : The Musical by ldshadowlady

omg this is such good production musically and vocally!

so what i’m getting is that everyone has a kingdom (ohhh empire lol) and they make alliances and play with each other

lizzie being the queen of the sea with her axolotl army had me ;-; in a good way

the song about her building her palace i already love this

the salmon vs. cod thing is so funny omg

outlaws and stand-off, there are assassinations and political war in the aesthetic minecraft server?! :O i love it even more.

also was not expecting joey graceffa i loved him in middle school

sausage seems very chaotic, double crossing king

JOEL AND LIZZIE MARRIED IN MINECRAFT AWWWW

there is no universe where lizzie and joel aren’t soulmates :):):):):)

“you could say it’s a date.” “no it’s a boat.” LOL IM DYING

Joel flirting and Lizzie just being oblivious for their whole song is so cute omg i want a joel in my life

their whole song being a fish pun is so cute as well

oh they’re so cute omg

the music and transitions gives me hadestown vibes but more lively if you get me at all

is this music on spotify?

IT IS!

time to unironically listen to minecraft music let’s gooooo

something old, something new, something borrowed, something blue is so special to me it’s literally the poem i want to use when i get married one day i ;;;

WHAT IS THE DEMON WHERR DID HE COME FROM?!

also xaneroth or however you spell it gives hades from hadestown vibes (songbird vs rattlesnake anyone?)

again, the rhyme scheme is on point love it

PROPHESIES?! YO?!?!

DEAL WITH DESTINY I KNOW THIS ONE! ITS SO GOOD!

I’VE GOT A DEEEEEEAAAAAAL WITH DESTINY!!!!! A BARGAIN WITH FATE!

I’VE NEVER HEARD THE BRIDGE TO END OF THIS SONG AHHHHH THE LAYERS!!!!

I’M SO HAPPY I LOVE THIS

THE ORB! SHE’S A FISH! THE END?! HELP?!

would you love me? if i was a fish?

xornoth got some beats

WAIT SHE ALMOST SAID FU-

not on my pg minecraft server

the voice acting in this is so good, color me impressed

YEAH THEY BEAT XORTNOTH

a crown to control all others?! what is this game of thrones type beat?!

the crown is so haunting of a song i love it

lizzie just goes: i’m turning to capitalism and slays it

this song tickles the brain cells, oh lizzie capitalism song i love you

the iconic game show every smp seems to have for some reason

LET THEM EAT CAKE TICKLES THE CELLS EVEN MORE

as a stampy kid i appreciate the cake shop and law, gives me the same vibes

a cake enforcer: as she should

THE RAID WAS SO TRAGIC NO!!!!!

this song was so much of a rollercoaster of emotions for no reason i’m so invested

MORE CROWN SONG LETS GOO

i love pg minecraft servers because it’s like “oh no, someone is in charge of all of us and we’re going to suffer” and the laws are “let them eat cake, tame dogs” and then there’s also murder

NEW ROAD TO A NEW PLACE?! hmmm i wonder where???

PROPHECIES!

this song sounds too happy for what was just announced.

FINISHING BUILDS!! YEAH!!

oh god, not the fortnight dancing please

SLAMON AND COD INTO THE REACTOR, WHY?!

YEAH ITS GOING TO EXPLODE

OH NO! EVERYTHING’S GONE!

WHAT??

AHHH

BLOOD SHEEP?

XORNOTH?!

THEY’RE FORTNIGHT DANCING TO THIS

AHHHHHHHH

WHAT?!

THATS HOW IT ENDS?!

;;;;o;;;;;

WHAT

and that’s it omg

yeah okay i’m hooked

good god i’ve been missing out on empires

i love minecraft roleplay so much it tears me apart from the inside out <3

i will be listening to this on spotify

i think my favorite song is deal with destiny or the one where lizzie turns into a capitalist, idk titles of songs

#song rambels #empires smp #empires season 1 #ldshadowlady #empires lizzie #i loved this so much! i am hooked on empires now time to binge #i’m gonna lizzie’s pov for now to catch up and then go watch other povs because lizzie now legally owns my soul from this video

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combat-wombatus · 3 years

Text

Truth or Dare

Pairing: Sero Hanta x reader

Genre: fluff, a lil bit of crack

Warnings: swearing (bakugou), but other than that, none! (unless u have traumatic memories of truth or dare)

WC: 3.1k

Summary: Mina and Denki work together to make sure that you know exactly who Sero's crush is.

(A/N): so @klvbxlove requested some headcanons about sero’s fem!crush having an obsession with kpop/anime and sero doing cute stuff for her and i tried sticking with the prompt in the beginning but then i led myself off-topic (oops) so it turned into this! sorry it’s not what u requested, i can write something else for u if u want! i was just struck by sudden ✨inspiration✨ for this fic so...here u go...

“EEEK!” You squealed, bouncing over to your friends. “LOOKLOOKLOOK-”

“(Y/L/N),” Bakugou grumbled. “Calm the fuck down, no one can understand you.”

You took a deep breath, then handed your phone over to Mina.

As soon as Mina saw the screen, she started squealing just like you were.

“(Y/N)!!!! OMGOMGOMGOMG-” she grabbed your arms and started jumping up and down like an overexcited toddler.

Bakugou rolled his eyes, gave an exasperated huff, then stomped away. “Can’t deal with you idiots when you’re like this.”

Mina dragged you by your arm over to a bench on the side of the cafeteria and the two of you spent your lunch break slurping udon and watching your favorite K-pop group’s newest music video on repeat.

Sero was chatting idly with his friends, mouth full of sushi. Unbeknownst to you, he had been watching you from the corner of his eye, sneaking glances every couple of minutes. Dense as Kaminari may be academically, he had noticed Sero’s preoccupation with you throughout the meal.

“Hey bro,” He poked Sero’s elbow with the clean end of his chopstick. “Whaddya keep looking at (Y/L/N)-chan for?” He squinted at Sero. He glanced briefly at you, and seeing nothing out of the ordinary, turned his eyes back on Sero. “Do you have a crush on her or something?”

Sero choked on his piece of salmon and spluttered, face beet red. “N-no! It’s not l-like that!”

Bakugou snorted. “You dumbass. The hell you mean ‘it’s not like that’? Any idiot with eyes and half a brain can see that you’re obsessed with her.”

As Sero tried to deny his feelings for you, Mina slowly shifted her attention from your phone to hers, which was dinging incessantly.

Kaminari

hey bro bro broski my man my lady? minaaaaa

Mina

asdkjfhluhal i told u to stop calling me that and what

Kaminari

so u know abt seros crush right

Mina

u have the AUDACITY to ask me, the queen of gossip, whether or not I know abt seros crush? the sheer AUDACITY is STAGGERING-

Kaminari

ok ok stop bullying me anyways wanna get them tog?

Mina

D U H would be easier if y/n wasn’t so dense and sero wasn’t so chicken

Kaminari

since ur in do u have a plan

Mina grinned. Of course she did. What kind of person did Kaminari think she was?

Mina

take sero to the boba place after school meet u there

Pocketing her phone, she turned back to face you. She had to resist the urge to cackle. This was gonna be fun.

Later that day, you and Mina walked to the dorms together.

“Whaddya say we go out today?” Mina asked excitedly, eyes gleaming. You found it a bit suspicious, since yesterday she had told you that she was failing math and was going to study with Yaomomo today.

“Didn’t you say you were going to study with Yaomomo?”

“Shit.” Mina face palmed. “I did, didn’t I? But I don’t waannnnaaa,” she whined. “Let’s just go out and get some boba and we’ll come back,” she promised, giving you the puppy dog eyes.

“Okay, okay.” You relented. “But if you fail math again, don’t blame it on me.”

She clasped a hand to her chest dramatically. “I would NEVER.”

Giggling, the two of you made your way to Coco’s Café, a cozy little place that served everything from coffee to cookies. It was also a developing cat café, mostly due to the popularity of the kitty that the place was named for, Coco.

Sidling up to the counter, you ordered a matcha boba tea while Mina ordered a strawberry milk tea with lychee jelly and boba.

“Is that it for you ladies today?” The man behind the counter asked cheerfully.

“Yes please!” Mina replied. The two of you sat in a corner booth, sipping your drinks and gossiping.

“Hey (Y/N),” Mina started. “So you know about Sero’s crush, right?”

You halted mid-sip. What? Sero had a crush?

Laughing at your startled expression, Mina leaned forward in a conspiratorial manner. “So,” she whispered. “Who do you think it is?”

You sat there, drink forgotten, racking your brain for possibilities. Jirou and Hagakure hung out with Sero sometimes, exchanging memes and goofing around, but they weren’t really around that often. Usually, Sero only hung out with Kaminari, Kirishima, Bakugou, Mina, and you. Mina, possibly? Was Sero gay? Did he have a thing for, say, Kaminari or Kirishima? You didn’t think that Sero would be the type to like Bakugou, but hey, he put up with Bakugou’s temper all the time, so maybe? Ugh. You resisted the urge to groan and drop your head into your hands. This was so complicated.

Mina sat back, this reaction obviously not being what she had hoped for. “Well?” She crossed her arms. “Do you have a guess yet?”

You thought about it, then decided to pick an answer randomly. “You?” You tried.

Mina snorted and almost spit out her drink. You were absolutely unbelievable. Of all the people you could’ve chosen, you picked HER? “No, (Y/N). It’s not me,” she managed to choke out in between fits of laughter.

You sprawled out on the table, no longer concealing your frustration. “Who is it then?” You whined. “Jirou? Hagakure? Is Sero gay?”

Mina actually did spit out her drink this time.

As she cleaned up her mess, Mina silently judged you with her signature side-eye. She really is that dense, huh. Guess I’ll have to knock some sense into her.

Furiously brainstorming, you tried to think of any more possibilities. As you sat in silence, something warm and fuzzy crawled sneakily onto your lap, and stayed there.

Knocked from your daze, you glanced down and the unfamiliar presence, only to realize that it was a kitty. THE kitty. Coco, the café’s namesake.

“Aww,” you cooed, lightly scratching behind her ears. She purred happily in response to your ministrations and curled into herself, tail tucked neatly around her haunches.

Just then, the doorbell jingled and the rest of your close friends walked in.

“Hey!” Kaminari chirped, giving you and Mina a lighthearted wave.

“Hey!” You replied, unaware of the glare Mina was currently giving Kaminari. As soon as they went up to order, Mina stood up and announced that she was going to the bathroom. You took out your phone and scrolled through your social media feeds, taking advantage of this time to research.

“Psst!” Mina pinched Kaminari’s elbow lightly.

“Ow! What?” Kaminari turned to face her.

Mina gave Kaminari her scariest glare. “I told you to bring Sero, not the whole squad!”

Kaminari whimpered. “But Kirishima heard and wanted to tag along too! And it would’ve been suspicious if I said no! And then Bakubro heard that Kiri was coming and decided to come too-”

Mina sighed. “You could’ve texted Sero in private!”

Scratching the back of his head, Kaminari gave Mina a sheepish smile. “Sorry Mina, I hadn’t thought of that”.

Mina stole a quick glance back at your table, and seeing that you were otherwise occupied, she turned her attention back to Kaminari.

“So, Stage 1 of the plan didn’t work. She didn’t even seem to consider herself as a possibility! However, no fear! It is time that we put Stage 2 into action!” Mina whisper-shouted. “It’ll be more complicated with Kiri and Bakugou present, but we always have a Plan B!” She quickly related her backup plan to Kaminari, who promised to tell the boys (minus Sero) to make it run more smoothly.

After giving Kaminari a quick fist bump, Mina slinked back into her seat. “So, (Y/N),” she paused, chin resting on her hand. “Since the boys are here, why don’t we ask Sero himself?”

You looked up from your phone. You hadn’t really found any clues as to who Sero’s crush could be. Most, if not all, of his posts were with your group of friends. You thought about it for a moment.

“Wouldn’t it be awkward if he didn’t want us to know?” You asked Mina.

“Oh, but we’re nosy friends! It’s our JOB to know and then tease him about it!” Mina giggled. “And besides,” she added. “Aren’t you even a little bit curious?”

You hesitated. She did have a point. You were curious, but at the same time, a little voice in the back of your brain nagged at you. Did you really want to know? Did you really want to see him crushing on someone else, and then tease him about it? That wouldn’t really be funny, for you, at least. But if you disagreed with Mina, it would be suspicious, and besides, you WERE curious. Even if the answer wasn’t the one you wanted, you would still rather it be out in the open than bottled inside. You’d rather know for certain than lose sleep over it at night.

Sighing, you relented. “Sure. What did you have in mind?”

Mina rested both of her elbows on the table and smiled at you, eyes gleaming with mischief.

“Truth or dare.”

As the boys returned, each holding their own drinks, Mina was bouncing in her seat. Bakugou and Kirishima each pulled up a chair, and Sero took the chance to sit next to you. At that, Mina smirked devilishly.

“So,” she grinned, fingertips dancing on the table. “Let’s play truth or dare.”

Bakugou huffed, crossing his arms and leaning back in his chair. He couldn’t believe he’d been roped into this, but Kirishima and Kaminari wouldn’t let him ruin it. Kirishima dropped a fist on the table. “Yeah!” He turned towards Mina. “Who’s starting?”

Mina pretended to think about it, when in reality, she had already made plans.

“How about (Y/N)?”

“Me?” You raised an eyebrow. You thought that Mina would be the one to interrogate Sero.

“Yes you, dummy,” Mina teased. “Is there another (Y/N) sitting here?”

You rolled your eyes. “Who are you calling dummy?”

Mina grumbled. “Just get on with it, would you? Who are you going to ask?”

“Hmm. How about Sero?” You turned to face him. “Truth or dare?”

Sero was panicking. You weren’t the type to give out ridiculous dares, and he definitely needed to be cautious about truth. “Dare.” He said confidently.

You chuckled. Mina had prepared you for this possibility.

“I dare you to kiss your crush within the next 24 hours,” you said, “and the whole squad had to be there to see it.”

Mina and Kaminari let out simultaneous “oohs”. Bakugou pointed out the obvious. “Why the next 24 hours?”

“Because we don’t know who his crush is and they’re probably not here right now,” you answered. “And the whole squad will have to see it to make sure that he does it and doesn’t chicken out. You’ll have to ask their permission first, though,” you added. “Consent is key. Even if they turn you down, as long as you tried, we’ll count the dare as completed.”

Your friends nodded in agreement. Mina clapped her hands gleefully. “You should’ve known, Sero! You can’t hide things from us!”

Sero was *this* close to having a panic attack. He had to consciously remind himself to keep breathing. This is going to be so embarrassing how am I going to do this without making an utter and complete fool of myself gosh you really should’ve not stared at her at lunch today Sero or this wouldn’t have happened jeez are you really that dumb now the whole squad will know and you won’t be able to look her in the eye anymore adfkhiavelrsnjaerliaevr BREATHE SERO BREATHE-

The game continued. Mina dared Bakugou to smile for 5 consecutive minutes, at which Bakugou nearly flew out of his seat, palms crackling.

“You fucking extra how dare you-” He didn’t get to finish, as Mina quickly took out her phone and opened the timer app.

“And the countdown starts now!” She cackled. “That is, unless you forfeit-”

“I’M NOT GONNA LOSE TO YOU, YOU DUMB FUCKING EXTRA!!!” With that, Bakugou angrily took his seat again, disregarding all the angry scowls he received from the rest of the café’s patrons, and pulled his lips up into what could only be described as the devil’s grin. He sat like that for a full five minutes, glaring lasers into Mina, not moving a muscle. You think Mina was mentally scarred after that, because she never looked at Bakugou for the rest of the game.

Kirishima dared Kaminari to record a video of him singing the pi song and send it to Jirou. The poor boy had so many voice cracks while singing it that Kirishima went easy on him and told him to just send the first 15 seconds.

Bakugou dared you to let everyone look through your phone for one minute. You were reluctant, but seeing as you were relatively normal with only minimal embarrassing photos, no confession texts, and a fairly clean search history, you let them do it. The most embarrassing thing they found was your playlist.

“How the fuck is your playlist 74 hours and 42 minutes? What the fuck do you have on here?” Bakugou held out your phone for the rest of your friends to see.

“And why is your history full of that shitty Korean music?”

You gasped. He did not.

“Hey!” You snatched your phone back. “If you’re going to insult my music, you don’t get to continue!”

“Tch.” Bakugou sneered. “You call that shit music?”

You were thoroughly offended by this point and refused to even acknowledge his statement. You glared at Bakugou with as much intensity as you could muster. This man had no taste in music whatsoever.

The 1-minute timer dinged, and Bakugou was saved from a scathing talking-to as you all moved onto the next victim.

Mina was dared to order a glass of milk with ice, then put it on a random table (with customers) and leave without an explanation. She ended up choosing an old couple, likely in their sixties, who were cuddling with two cats. They’d each ordered a cup of coffee and shared a plate of cookies. When Mina put the glass of iced milk on their table, and the two women shared a confused look before turning their attention to Mina.

“Thank you?” The lady with horn-rimmed glasses asked rather shakily.

“Yes, thank you very much young lady, but we didn’t order this?” The one who had a tabby on her lap said, perplexed, looking Mina up and down.

Mina made a motion with her hand, zipping her lips, then giggled and sat back down at your table. The two ladies, baffled, took one look at your table and seemed to understand what was going on. They turned back to their coffees and cats and resumed their conversation.

You had all gone one full circle, and everyone had finished their drinks, so you all decided that it was time to go. You rubbed between Coco’s ears one last time and walked out into the afternoon sun.

“Hey Sero!” Kirishima clapped Sero on his back. “Don’t think we’ve forgotten about your dare,” he smiled cheekily. “Better get it over with when we first head back into the dorms, huh? That’ll probably be the easiest time to get it over with.”

Sero groaned. He’d hoped that you would all forget after the game was over, but his luck had run dry. He’d have to face the music sooner or later. He debated on his options. If he waited too long, he’d seem cowardly. He didn’t want to do that. On the other hand, maybe if he waited a full day, you would all forget? He shook his head. No, with Mina here, she’d never let him live it down. And besides, who was he to renege on a dare?

Taking his hands out of his pockets, he rubbed them together nervously. This was it. This was the moment of truth.

“Hey guys! Wait up!” He called out to Kirishima and Bakugou, who had walked ahead of the group. “I’ve got something to show you!”

Bakugou quirked an eyebrow. “Oh?” He smirked. “Whatcha got, Tape Arms?”

Sero cleared his throat. “I-I’m ready. I’m ready to do the dare.”

Your heart leapt into your throat. It was just you and the rest of the squad here. Did you really have a chance? You were scared to get your hopes up, but maybe, just maybe, you would be the one he kissed.

Hands curled into fists at his sides, Sero gulped. He was doing this. He was really doing this. He closed his eyes, took a deep breath in and out, and strode over to where you and Mina stood.

“(Y/N),” He stared at his feet. “Would you…would you allow me to kiss you?”

You covered your mouth with your hand, trying to calm yourself down. It was you. Sero had a crush on you. Your crush liked you back!

After a while, Bakugou felt the need to step in.

“Oi, dumbass!” He hollered, garnering the attention of curious passerby. “You gonna let Soy Sauce Face over there kiss you or not?”

Your face flushed a furious red. “U-Umm, y-yeah!” You stuttered. “You can kiss me, Sero!” You cringed at how excited you sounded.

Slowly, Sero tilted his face downwards. He lifted your chin tenderly and lowered his lips to yours. His lips were soft against yours, his breath tickling your cheek as he let go. You blushed harder than you ever thought was possible, and he looked down with a pleased smile.

“Thanks, (Y/N).” He said in a soft voice. “Can I take this as a sign that you have feelings for me too?”

Nodding frantically, you whispered a noncommittal “mhm”.

“Can’t hear you, sweets,” Sero teased. “Come on, I’m gonna need a verbal confirmation.”

Looking up at him, you cleared your throat. “Yes.” You whispered in a slightly louder tone. “Yes, I h-have feelings for you too.”

At this admission, your friends all cheered, Mina hooting especially loudly. “Hells yeah!” She high-fived Kaminari. “We did it!”

“Best wingmen ever!” Kaminari shouted.

“That was so manly of you Sero!” Kirishima added, flashing a thumbs-up. “Congrats!”

“Tch. Yeah, whatever. Finally got it in their thick skulls that they liked each other. Big fucking deal,” Bakugou grumbled.

“Hey, hey! Don’t you go and ruin the mood now!” Mina scolded him. “Just look at them! They look so happy!” She pointed towards you and Sero.

“Hmph. Well, those idiots could’ve been happier sooner if Sero had the fucking balls to confess earlier.”

“Oh, shut it already! Just be glad that they’re finally together!”

“Like I care.”

“Stop pretending, you big grouch! We all know you care!”

“Tch.”

Masterlist

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mst3kproject · 3 years

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The Monster of Piedras Blancas

At some point I realized that I'd done an awful lot of fishman movies on this blog, so I decided I needed a tag for them. I chose #it's beginning to look a lot like fishmen, after a rather amusing musical version of The Shadow over Innsmouth that you can find on YouTube. Most of them are less fun than said video, and this one very much so. It qualifies itself for MST3King by featuring Forrest Lewis from The Thing that Couldn't Die, Don Sullivan from The Giant Gila Monster, and Jeanne Carmen from Untamed Youth.

Some lonely people feed the birds or stray cats in their neighbourhood. The lighthouse keeper of Piedras Blancas doesn't have any of those, so he feeds the fish monster that lives below the rocks. As long as he does this, it only occasionally kills people when they wander into its territory, but trouble begins when the grocer fails to save enough meat scraps to satisfy it. Soon the hungry beast is lopping heads off right and left and draining the bodies of blood! The local constable thinks he may have a homicidal maniac on his hands, but marine biologist Fred identifies a shed scale at the scene as belonging to a Diplovertebron, a beast thought to be long-extinct.

Diplovertebron is an actual creature with its own Wikipedia article and everything. According to said article, it was a lizardy sort of a thing that lived in what is now the Czech Republic three hundred million years ago, and was around half a meter long. It's a very obscure and not terribly threatening animal, and I have a hard time imagining why the writers chose it, of all extinct creepy-crawlies, to be their monster's ancestor. It doesn't even have a very interesting name. 'Diplovertebron' is quite technical-sounding and has too many syllables to roll nicely off the tongue. Why not pick something that at least sounds scary?

The Monster of Piedras Blancas is a bloated, sedate movie. It knows that movies need breaks between the actiony bits... but its actiony bits have no real action, and the talky scenes it inserts to space them out are deathly dull and contribute almost nothing. There's a bit where two characters discuss a victim's time of death in great detail, taking into account things like a spilled bottle of ink, that would have reduced Joel to tears. It almost becomes a joke when Fred and the Doctor discuss the minutiae of Diplovertebron scales, while the constable sits there growling impatiently at them. When even your characters think the movie is too slow, you have a problem.

Everything that might possibly be exciting takes place off-screen. This is fine and even expected during the 'building suspense' parts – of course we don't see the deaths of the fishermen or the grocer. The bit where we first see the entire monster, when characters open a walk-in fridge and it lumbers out holding a severed head, is honestly pretty well-done. After that, however, we should finally get to see some monster-eating-people scenes... but since this is yet another stupid rubber fishman suit a la the She-Creature, all it's actually capable of is slapping a few guys and then fleeing. It supposedly kills a couple of gun-toting rednecks, but the fight happens elsewhere while the audience watches Fred and the doctor fart around in a cave. We don't see the monster again until it inevitably kidnaps the lighthouse-keeper's cute daughter at the climax.

The severed head is pretty plasticky and looks nothing like the guy it supposedly came from, but an effort was made and I respect that. There are veins sticking out the bottom of it and a really creepy bit where we find it in the monster's lair with crabs crawling over it.

As the movie draws closer to its climax, the men in the town sit down and have a good think about how they're going to defeat it. They know they can't overpower it, and it seems to be reasonably intelligent, so they've decided they're going to have to outwit it. Their big plan for doing so is... throw a net over it.

I expected this to fail spectacularly, but what actually happened was even dumber. I will not spoil the last thirty seconds of this movie for you, because it's funny as hell, but let's just say that fishmen are like pumas – if you ever meet one in real life, you can just push it the hell over.

As you might have guessed, Lucy is only in this movie so that she can be saved from the monster and can kiss Fred as the words the end appear on the screen. The only interesting thing about her is a brief moment of stunning misogyny. She comes running to the doctor to tell him her father has had an accident and needs help – and before going to do so, the doctor makes Lucy take a sedative. Her behaviour was not in any way hysterical or unreasonable. A little reassurance would have done the job just fine!

This scene suggests that the townspeople don't think very highly of Lucy, and there are other bits that tell us she's probably supposed to be at least ten years younger than twenty-nine-year-old actress Jeanne Carmen. On the other hand, they seem to think she's capable enough to look after her injured father alone and with only a locked door to protect her from the marauding monster. Then again, if they didn't, it couldn't carry her off to be menaced. Yet again, a movie's leading lady is a plot device rather than a character. This seems particularly true of fishman movies. Think of the Creature from the Black Lagoon series.

As I mentioned upfront, I have seen a lot of fishman movies. This is the fifteenth since this blog's inception! I thought there were a lot of bigfoot movies around, but if you check the tags you'll see that fishmen outnumber him two to one! This brings up an interesting question – namely, why?

Why fishmen? Sea Monsters have a long and fascinating history that includes not just the classic serpent and kraken but such things as savage merpeople, scaly pig-fish covered with eyes, and according to one sixteenth-century map, very large Yorkshire terriers. Then along came the 1930s and the popularization of the Loch Ness Monster as plesiosaur, opening up the range to prehistoric sea beasties. Why not one of those?

I'm guessing the answer is 'because they're expensive'. Those would require puppets and stop motion and other special effects. A guy in a costume is much cheaper to build and operate.

Okay, but even if you have to restrict yourself to human-shaped monsters, there are plenty of those, too! There's the aforementioned merpeople, but also vampires, werewolves, zombies, mummies, and their ilk! Dracula and Frankenstein are both in the public domain! And make no mistake, people have made lots of movies about those... but they have also made a whole lot of movies about fishmen! Why fishmen?

The answer, most likely, is that Creature from the Black Lagoon came out in 1954 and it was huge, being one of those movies that requires an entire separate Wikipedia article for its cultural impact! The tidal wave of other fishman movies that followed it are like the glut of monster-on-a-spaceship movies that followed Alien, or the fad for teenage slasher movies in the 1980s, or those cheaply animated direct-to-DVD movies that cluster around every Disney and Dreamworks release. A fishman movie had made money, and now everybody was lining up to milk the scaly, mucus-coated cash cow!

That was a terrible mix of metaphors right there. Yuck.

There's also something uniquely horrifying about one of the genre's major tropes – the fishman's interest in human women. This, too, began with Creature from the Black Lagoon but as we've seen it carried over into other films – Bog and Creatures from the Abyss are notable examples (and then there's The Shape of Water). In The Monster from Piedras Blancas this idea is present in that the monster kidnaps Lucy instead of just killing her like it did every other human it met, but it's not emphasized the way the monster's interest in Kay was in Black Lagoon. Fish are proverbially cold and slimy, and the idea of sexual contact with one is almost reminiscent of necrophilia unless you have some very specific interests (see previous parentheses). The fishman's lack of genitals make it that much more disturbing.

So now that we've sorted that out, my final question about fishman movies is this: could a fishman beat bigfoot in a fight? They're both big, broad-chested creatures that movies like to outfit with claws, teeth, superhuman strength, and bad tempers. I think it would depend on where the battle happened. If they're in the water, then the fishman has a clear advantage – bigfoot can drown. If they're on land, things are a little more even. The fishman's slime would make him difficult to hang onto, but if his gills dry out he'll have a hard time breathing. Bigfoot's fur gives the fishman something to yank, but his large feet make him hard to knock down. It might depend on whether or not the fishman is venomous.

Why hasn't anybody made that movie? Picture it – dozens of fishmen swimming upstream to spawn, and bigfoot dragging them out of the water to eat like bears with salmon! I'd absolutely pay for exorbitantly expensive theatre popcorn if it meant I got to see that on screen!

#mst3k #reviews #episodes that never were #the monster of piedras blancas #50s #it's beginning to look a lot like fishmen

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jj-ktae · 4 years

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·41/45· Intoxicated - Prompt Game -

Title : Intoxicated Pairing : Park Jinyoung x Fem!reader Genre : Angst, Fluff, romance Words : 2060 Summary : Breaking up with Jinyoung was already complicated, yet he came, drunk and desperate, at 4 in the morning. Prompts : N° 41 : “Do you remember our first kiss?” N° 45 : “I don’t want you to stop.”

Prompt Game - Masterlist -

Intoxicated

Your sofa is not comfortable. You never noticed how hard it feels against your back as you try to find a better position while watching questionable videos at 4 in the morning.

It doesn’t matter, rest is for people who can turn shut their brain off. You can’t. It’s been a month. A whole thirty-one days of going back to a life made of instant noodles and drooling on your favourite fluffy pillow.

Today is Friday and after numerous rejections, your friends gave up and stopped forcing you to join them into some fancy bar. It doesn’t feel right to be partying like this, especially when you feel like rolling yourself into your blanket like a burrito.

Which is already done.

It’s not like you’re depressed; you’re the one who broke up with your boyfriend because of event you were not sure you could get out of.

Jinyoung is a man of high standards. He was raised in a wealthy family where everyone has their own role and future traced from the crib. He followed his parents’ choices without rebelling once.

Except one time, two months ago.

You had been dating for almost a year when his parents found him a spouse. She was the daughter of a man everyone wanted on their side and his family couldn’t say no when the promise of a profitable alliance appeared in their household.

Only then you saw how unflappable Jinyoung could be. He would reject day after day, not bothered when his parents used the word disown as a weapon. Jinyoung didn’t even flinch and was ready to pack and move in with you.

Poor boy would hate spending all his evenings on your sofa.

It became too big for you to handle. There was nothing you could do except break up with him so before he could run away from his luxury you left, lying about not loving him, using the word mistake like it meant nothing.

Jinyoung had told you though. Trust me, he always said.

There was nothing to trust. Jinyoung would have never been able to find another job if these two companies were to team against him. It is true that he is a simple man, but you couldn’t live with the idea of being what destroyed his life.

So you walked away, isolating yourself and ruining your health at work. It’s been a month and you feel as empty, the feeling of being the one responsible for your own misery distilling hate into your whole existence.

There is no turning back now. Jinyoung must get married and become what he is destined to be.

You’re clicking on this documentary about salmon trout and their reproduction cycle when heavy knocking on your door startles you.

Your neighbours are probably going to complain about non-existent noises because that’s what they do.

You check your pyjamas - shrugging when you notice a stain a ketchup from your precious fries session.

But it’s not the old neighbour you find behind the door.

“You opened the door…” Jinyoung’s smug smile makes you take a step back. He is leaning against the doorway, head restless. “I thought you wouldn’t…”

“What are you doing here? Why are you drunk?” You inquire before checking the hall.

Jinyoung laughs, his head raising in evident distress. “I am not drunk! Come on!” His voice dies when you pull on his arm to force him inside.

Damn him for showing up completely drunk.

“Oh so I can come in” Jinyoung mumbles, letting his plastic bag fall on the floor with a loud thud before attempting to untie his shoes.

“It’s just until you sober up.” You scold, blaming your soft side for giving in so quickly. You didn’t have a choice; your building is filled with people who abuse the police’s phone number daily.

Jinyoung snorts, grabbing his bag again and aiming for your sofa where he lets himself fall. “I brought wine. You love wine.” His voice becomes sad as unwraps the bottle.

You sigh, reaching his side and taking the bottle. “Thank you. Now rest and leave when you feel better. You know where everything is.”

It’s too much work. Dealing with a drunk Jinyoung is usually funny; he becomes a mess of clumsy and cute and oh god he becomes so luscious as soon as music starts.

“I didn’t come all the way here to sleep on a sofa!” He pouts, crossing his arms over his chest.

“Why did you come then?” You turn around to put the bottle on the dining table before gasping. “Holy shit Jinyoung, this is a Domaine de la Romanée Conti! Take it with you, it’s expensive!”

Jinyoung snickers, his lazy hand brushing your words off. “Do I look like I care about this…”

“Listen,” You walk back to the sofa, stopping when Jinyoung leans over his knees to bury his head into his hands. “I’ll put the bottle back into the bag. Rest for now and you can leave whenever you want. “

“How is it so easy for you?” His question breaks you out of your monologue. “How is it so easy to speak like this?”

“Jinyoung, I don’t think it’s a good-”

“A good idea?” He asks, raising his head and revealing moist eyes. “All of this was a very bad idea, right? Because it was a mistake?” His head seems clearer suddenly. “Do you even think I believed you for one second?”

You raise a hand and shake your head. “No Jinyoung. You won’t make me say what you want to hear. You’re drunk, stop this.”

“Of course I am drunk!” He speaks louder, annoyance tainting his vocal cords. “I am wasted because it’s all I can do! Breaking news: not everyone is as heartless as you.”

It stings. No matter how this is what you wanted, hearing his pain can only make you regret.

“It’s better this way. Look around you! How would you have lived? Jobless? Disowned?” He doesn’t understand. Life is not a soap opera; love is not always the answer to everything.

“I told you to trust me! I told you I would sort this out! You didn’t listen, you freaked out and left, even though I told you to stay with me, no matter how I begged! How cruel is that?” Jinyoung gets up, ignoring his spinning head and contracting stomach. Rage is blurring his vision and the memories haunting.

You don’t know what to answer. As much as you want to think you are right, it is cruel. Jinyoung didn’t go against his parents to get dumped.

“I don’t know what to say...all I did was for your happiness. You can’t risk everything for me.” You explain, eyes now equally watery.

Jinyoung nods, eyes closing painfully. He goes to the windows; the place he loves the most in your whole flat. “Do you remember our first kiss?” he asks, not even turning around. “It was right here.”

You smile, that night still printed into your brain. Jinyoung confessed a day after you both met.

His smile was wide and hopeful that day; nothing seemed to stop him as he explained his attraction to you and how he loved the way you dismissed him when he showed up at your desk and explained he had to see your boss for and important matter.

He had left his number on his way back with a wink while your boss yelled at you for not letting the son of an important business man see him.

Stupid, you thought, as you still dialled his number to complain.

He asked you out and a day later you were kissing, his hands on your hips and yours in his hair.

Now he looks pitiful, abandoned and disturbed.

“I remember.”

He finally turns around, his last attempt at making you come back to him hanging on his lips.

“I made it clear that no one else but you are going to be in my heart.” He raises said hand, a single tear falling on his cheeks and he must be pretty drunk to openly cry like that in front of you. “Did you really think I was going to get married to someone else but you? This is ridiculous, you don’t marry people you don’t love.” he walks away, pacing weirdly and even bumping into your lamp.

“What have you been telling your parents?” Jinyoung is stubborn, you don’t know why but he cannot let things go. “What are you going to do if they ever-”

“If they can’t understand something as simple as their only son’s well-being, there is nothing I can do.” Jinyoung concludes, looking hurt both because of your rejection and his parents’ inability to let him do what he wants. “I will not stay around people who want me miserable, but I can stick to those who make me feel loved and understood.”

“I’m sure it can’t be that bad to get married to a rich and pretty girl.”

Jinyoung stops walking, looking dumbfounded. “Do you even hear yourself? It can’t be that bad?”

“I mean, your career is your future. Your family is important, too! What is so special about me that you’re willing to risk everything even after I broke up with you?!” You yell, hating both yourself and him for being in such a situation.

“I don’t know, you tell me. Why are you wearing stained pyjamas on a Friday night while watching stupid videos? Why aren’t you enjoying your single life as you should?” Jinyoung hits jackpot as easy as he used to. He knows you; you’re not the type of person who watches questionable videos, anyways.

“I was tired.” Is all you say, your drained face giving away your current mind-set.

“Please,” Jinyoung rubs his forehead, completely done with your behaviour. “You’re not happy. You think you made the right decision but you didn’t. You’re fooling yourself and trying to be an altruist by ‘saving my life’ yet you’re stomping on me again and again. So what if I have to work shitty jobs and sleep here? Are you scared that you might not take advantage of my bank account? Is me being poor so bad that you want me out of your life?”

It triggers you, it triggers you so much that you start crying. “Stop!” You shake your head, your heart clenching. “I’m warning you, never imply, ever again, that I was after your money.” you want to sound threatening but you must look ridiculous. “Do you think it’s easy for me? Do you think I can spit venom and feel nothing? I didn’t want you to suffer because of me, I want you to be happy and live the life you should be living. I’m literally forcing myself to stop loving you, Jinyoung.”

“You don’t understand, I don’t want you to stop.” Jinyoung breathes, his feet aiming for your trembling figure. His tone softens when he sees you crying. He doesn’t think he will ever be able to handle such a view. “What I’m trying to say is that no matter the amount of wealth and the number of connections, you make me happy and you’re the life I should be living. If you take that away from me, I’m done for.”

You sob harder, his words buzzing and more comforting than ever.

He brushes your arm silently, his head dipping to take a good look at your bloodshot eyes. “Can you please stop trying to take all the decisions and believe me? It’s been a month and now I need you to come back to me.”

He doesn’t give you a choice; but you don’t need to ponder.

“Are you really not going to regret this?” You try one last time, your eyes searching for his but his drunk face shows no concern, no sign of doubt, no hint of hesitation.

“All I’m regretting is that I didn’t come sooner.” He concludes, his arms spreading to signal he needs a hug.

You carefully envelop him, his scent hinting he has been drinking a lot of liquor. “Promise me you’ll try to convince your parents some more.”

You hear him chuckle, his arms rubbing your back. “I promise.”

“I actually missed you a lot.”

Jinyoung can only inhale, his arms tightening and head finding shelter in the crook of your neck.

“Welcome back, baby.”

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xxriverxx · 3 years

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hi !! this is river !! they are character #22, from boston, non-binary, bisexual, chill, hopefully funny, self-hating and self-loving, and studying art history bc i wanted an art hoe. i’m putting their info below pls plot with me yayay im so excited.

welcome aboard, river navarro, student #22. we are excited to set sail with you ! has anyone told you that you look like aron piper? according to our records, you hail from boston, usa, prefer they/them pronouns, are non-binary, and are here to study art history. we also see you received a spot on the ss university because of your academic scholarship — we won’t tell anyone. during your first few weeks here, other students said you were + relaxed, + genial, but also - self-critical. it sounds like you spend most of your time at the sun deck. upon checking your luggage, we noticed you packed a snowglobe from quincy market.

river grew up as the oldest child of three younger brothers and one younger sister. they are closest with their sister, of course, and protective of her. their brothers are kind of losers, but river still takes responsibility for them as the oldest sibling. they spent their whole life living in beantown usa, aka boston. yea, they’ve got that annoying boston drawl accent because they didn’t live in the touristy areas. love them anyway.

after reading about this experimental education cruise online, river knew it was the perfect thing for them. they’ve spent their whole life shielding their younger siblings from their parents’ drama and divorce, and river decided it was finally time to do something for themselves. so this lil art hoe hopped on board the second they were able. they love to paint ( not like well ... more like ... messy polluck shit, ) and doodle badly. their hair is always being dyed different colors depending on what quarter life crisis river is going through at the time. some days they are the most friendly, outgoing person you’ve ever met, and other days they’re locked up sulking in their bedroom in true infj fashion. good luck with them. pls plot with them. they’re lovely at heart and messy on the outside.

also, if it means anything to you, they’re a pisces sun, virgo moon, leo rising.

things river likes:

top 40 music. yea, instead of hating what’s popular, river likes the concept of each generation having a set of pop culture and music that reflects a collective identity. or, yknow, corporate goons making money. but regardless, top 40 music is out there and everyone knows it and they think that is kind of beautiful, in a way, all the memories tied to those songs.

also the most obscure indie music shit in genres you never even knew existed

monster energy drinks.

taking everyday pictures and selling them as stock photos online

alcohol. lots of liquor. but also, lots and lots of white wines. the cheaper the better. probably drinks way too much for healthy levels and has a questionable relationship with it.

romance and romance novels. whatever. dont judge them.

bright colors. neons and light pastels are their favorite.

comedy films

indie films

comedic indie coming of age films

stupid video games no one plays anymore like runescape and monkeyball ( and yea they brought their gamecube aboard )

school. learning. knowing stuff. the tv show jeopardy.

literally any animal

spaghetti, spinach pizza, authentic mexican food, and those weird jello cakes with fruit in them ( their mom always made them )

things river hates:

people who hate everything for no reason

people who hate everyone for no reason

cleaning up their room ( sorry roommies )

horror films

studying. forcing yourself to retain things only for an exam.

their ugly handwriting

avocados, strawberries, tomatoes, burgers, salmon, and any food that requires too much formal dining.

if you like this post i will im u to plot <3

#↳ ✧ 𝄪 mun ooc.#seasintro #drinking tw

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atlafan · 4 years

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Take it Slow - Part Seventy-Seven

a/n: okay this is my first shot at a harry:y/n fic, and it will be multiple parts. y/n had a bad experience with an ex over a year ago, and finally accepts her coworker and good friend Niall’s invitation to go on a blind date with his friend Harry.

Warnings: Fluff and smut.

a/n: shorter part tonight since last night was so long.

Masterpost (all previous parts can be found in the masterpost)

“Babe? Gotta package.” Harry says as he comes in from work.

“Oh I wonder if it’s my shirt for the concert!” You rush over to him and snatch it. “I got a shirt from Etsy cause I don’t really like the merch.”

Harry smiles as you open the package and you gasp with delight. You got a black short sleeve crop top that said “Blinding Lights” on it it glittery writing.

“It’s perfect! Do you like it?”

“Yeah, looks nice.” He kisses your cheek and goes to sit on the sofa with Buster.

“I’m so excited, Harry. I still can’t believe you got fifth row seats!” You plop down next to him.

“Was thinkin’ we could go in and eat at Beer Works beforehand, would you like that?”

“Yeah! Love it there. Only a couple more days!” You squeal. “Do you feel like you know enough of the lyrics?”

“Yeah, babe. Think I got it.” He smiles.

“I wonder what songs he’ll do from his older albums. I hope he does Party After the After Party, that’s one of my absolute favorites.”

“I know, that’s your go to when we’re fuckin’.”

“Shut up.” You swat at him and giggle. “I like Aquainted too, and I Feel It Coming. Honestly, every song by him is a good song.”

“And you’ve really never seen him live before?”

“Never! This is the best early birthday present ever.”

“Does your family have anythin’ planned for you. I know we’re gonna be gone for a long weekend during your actual birthday…”

“No, I think our plan is to do a conjoined thing. Michael’s birthday is the weekend after mine, and my dad’s is the weekend after that. Michael’s gonna be one I can’t believe it. So we’ll just go to his birthday party. My family will call me on my birthday.”

“That’s right, I forgot about Michael’s party. Damn, this summer is just flyin’ by.”

“I know! We leave for London soon too, it’s crazy.”

“Are you sure your mum is cool with having Buster for an entire week?”

“Yeah, she loves watching him. I’m gonna miss him so much.” You pout.

“I know, he’s just too big to bring on a plane, unfortunately.”

You grab the remote and turn the TV on.

“Do you mind if I watch Glee? I feel like once I start I can’t stop.”

“Yeah, I don’t care.”

“You like it a little, don’t you?” You look at him grinning.

“It has some funny moments. Jane Lynch’s character is hilarious. It’s a little cringey though.”

“That’s Ryan Murphy for you.” You shrug.

“Plus…I’m fully invested in this will they won’t they with Rachel and Finn. I’m hooked on it.”

“God, I don’t think you’ve ever said anything sexier to me.” You kiss him and get snuggled up.

The night of the concert you make sure your hair looks perfect. You had really grown it out, and your waves looked great. You put your new crop top on and get to work on your makeup. Tonight was a false lash kind of night. You grab a high waisted pair of black jeans with some rips in them and put them on. You could just see the top of your naval piercing. You cuff the bottoms of your jeans and you’re very happy with how you look.

Harry had a pair of salmon pink shorts on and a black silk shirt with the first few buttons undone tucked into them. You liked that you and Harry had different fashion senses. You also loved when he wore anything to show off his tattoos a bit.

“You look so good, Harry.” You wrap your arms around him.

“So do you.” He kisses the top of your head. “Niall will be here soon to watch Buster, he just texted.”

Niall comes up with Sarah.

“Damn! Okay, out on the balcony, gotta take some cute pics before you get all sweaty at the concert.” Sarah says and you giggle.

She takes some pictures of the two of you outside. You take some nice ones and some silly ones. You kiss him on the cheek in one.

“Kiss each other, go on.”

Harry chuckles and turns to you. He tilts your chin up and kisses you.

“So cute.”

“Thanks, Sarah.” You take your phone from her.

“I’m so glad you finally got a new phone, the camera is so much better.”

“I know! I was just waiting for a good deal to upgrade.”

“You two kids have fun.” Niall smiles. “Do you want us here? I don’t mind bringin’ him across the street.”

“It’s up to you.” Harry says. “You guys can stay here if yeh want, doesn’t matter.”

“Yeah, make yourselves at home.” You smile and give Buster a hug. “Thanks again for watching him.”

You and Harry head out. You decide to take the green line over towards the Garden. You walk over to Beer Works which isn’t too far away, and sit at the bar. You each do a tequila shooter and order some apps. Harry sticks with beer, and you get a hard cider.

You walk hand in hand, slightly buzzed, into the Garden. Your tickets get scanned in and you make your way to your seats.

“Harry…holy shit, look at how close we are.”

“Want me to take your picture in front of the stage?”

“Please!”

You beam at him and hand him your phone. Someone offers to take a picture of the two of you in front of the stage as well.

“We’re really going to be able to see him, oh my god.” You hug him and he chuckles.

“Want me to grab us some drinks?”

“Yeah, that would be great actually. Do you want some money, I brought-“ He looks at you.

“I’ll be back with some beers.”

You watch Harry walk away, and look back to the stage. You can’t help but squeal with excitement. Harry comes back about ten minutes later with two large beers.

“Line was already crazy.” He hands you yours.

“Thanks, babe.” You sip on it and he sits down next to you.

You both were taking advantage of the little time left you wouldn’t be on your feet. You were happy you both were smart enough to at least wear sneakers.

You and Harry go for bathroom and beer runs during the two opening acts, not really interested in their music as much. You get back in your seats just when the second opener is done. The Garden goes dark and you squeal. You both stand up and you scream along with the crowd when he comes out.

He starts off with Alone Again, and works his way through most of the After Hours album. The crowd goes nuts when he goes into Starboy. You were having a great time. You ended up standing in front of Harry so you could rock against him. You would occasionally here him sing along and it sent a shiver up your spine. You got some great pictures and videos of The Weeknd, you swore he looked right at you. He sings I Feel It Coming, and Harry wraps his arms around you tighter. Another song you two had on in the background many times. Next he goes into Earned It, Often, and Acquainted. You were losing your fucking mind. He sounded so good loud, and you were having the best time just jamming out.

“So I thought I’d talk to the crowd for a minute, we’re at that point in the show.”

The crowd roars as he addresses certain people. He calls different people out, it’s a lot of fun. He has thre lights up in the balcony so he can thank the people from farther away. He walks along the stage, calling out people closer to him. Then his eyes fall to you.

“This girl, who’s been dancing on her man all night, where’d you get that shirt?” You freeze and point to yourself. “Yes, you. That’s not official merch.” He scolds you and you laugh.

“It’s from Etsy! Get better merch!”

“Get better merch, huh?” The crowd laughs. “Well, I’m glad someone made some money, guess that’s all that matters. You having a good time?” You smile and nod your head yes. “I know you are, you’ve been grooving the whole night, we love to see it.”

He moves on to someone else and you turn to look at at Harry, your mouth agape.

“I filmed that whole thing! Look!” Harry shows you his phone.

“That was the coolest fucking thing ever!”

He does his Dirty Diana cover, and then goes into Party After the After Party. You turn around to Harry and squeal, then you turn around to watch the stage again. Harry couldn’t help but laugh at your excitement. You had been a ball of energy all night. The show ends, and he comes back out to sing The Hills.

You and Harry wait a minute or two to head out, letting the crowd disperse before fighting your way through it. You walk through the Garden, keeping your hand on the back of Harry’s shorts while he leads you through the people. You get down to the green line, and only find one seat available. He sits down and pulls you into his lap. You turn to look at him and smile.

“This was one of the greatest nights of my life. Thank you so much.”

“I’m so glad you had fun. That was one of the best concerts I’ve been to in a long time.”

“I can’t believe he actually spoke to me! That was so cool.”

Harry moves to whisper in your ear.

“I can’t wait to get you home. You were grinding your ass on me all night, it was torture.” He kisses your cheek and holds you a little tighter. You smile at him and kiss him quick.

Sarah was passed out, leaning on Niall’s shoulder. The two thought Buster would be more comfortable in his own home. They were watching TV when she fell asleep. Niall was half asleep when he heard the shuffle of feet and giggling from the front hall.

“Babe, I think they’re back.” He lightly nudges her.

“Hm? Okay.” She yawns.

Harry gets you through the door, and lifts you up so you can wrap your legs around him. He pushes you up against the wall and kisses on your neck. You start giggling. Your hands move to unbutton Harry’s shirt. You push it off his shoulders and he lets it fall to the floor. He takes your crop top off and kisses on your chest. You had a simple black bra on.

“Bedroom.” You groan into his ear.

He gets a better grip on you and starts walking into the rest of the apartment.

“Oh my god!” Sarah says.

Harry sets you down and hugs you to his chest. You hide your face in him. He needed you to stay close to hide his raging boner.

“You two are still here?” He says embarrassed.

“Yeah, we were gonna stay until you got home! Are you both drunk?!” You turn your head slightly to look at them and nod.

“Jesus.” Niall laughs. “Glad yeh didn’t get full naked out there.”

“Okay, well, thank you both so much for watchin’ Buster, goodnight.”

“Wait, how was the concert?”

“It was good Sarah, goodnight!” You say to her.

“Alright, alright, we’re leaving.”

Niall gives harry a thumbs up before they leave.

“They act like they never get a chance to do it.” Sarah laughs and looks at Niall. “How come we never do that?”

“Do what?”

“You never feel the need to get my clothes off the second we walk in the door.”

“Oh, you mean like this?”

Niall lifts Sarah up over his shoulder the second they get into his apartment and she squeals.

“I completely forgot they’d be here.” Harry says laughing.

“Me too!” You look at each other for a second. “Are gonna stand here or?”

“Oh right.”

He lifts you back up and carries you to the bedroom. Buster stays asleep in his dog bed. Harry undoes your jeans and yanks them down your legs. You do the same with his shorts. His lips connect with yours and you moan against him as he pushes his hips to yours. He really was hard.

You suck his bottom lip into your mouth and he groans. His hands dip into your panties and he drags them down your legs. He stays kneeling before you and grabs you by your ass, pulling you closer. He tugs one of your legs over one of his shoulders and he lips connect to your clit. You gasp when you feel his tongue lick up and down your folds. You tugs at his hair and he moans against you. He sucks and slurps on you and you feel like you’re going to lose your balance, but he steadies you. Just like when you feel you’re gonna come he stands up.

“Sorry.” He smirks. “My knees just hurt.”

“Thought you were trying to tease me.” You pout.

“Not tonight, angel.”

His hands move around you to unclasp your bra and it falls to the floor. He moves you over to the bed and he hovers over you. He kisses down your neck and chest, and sucks one of your nipples into his mouth. You reach for him and pump him slowly. He twists your piercing between his teeth while he kneads your other breast.

“Harry.” You groan. “Want you inside me, please.”

“Want you on top.”

He kisses you and sits up against the headboard. You swing a leg over him and line yourself up to sink down on him.

“Fuck.” You breathe out.

You swivel your hips and grind against him. Harry wraps his arms around you and thrusts up. You move in a rhythm together and it feels amazing. You tug at his hair and kiss him, tongues gliding along each other. Your head rolls back when he starts to rub your clit. His other hand slides up to your throat. You make eye-contact with him.

“Okay?”

“Yeah, go for it.” You smile, and he tightens his grip around you.

He moves his other hand faster on you as both continue in sync. You start panting, and love the way Harry’s large hand grips your throat. Harry looks at you, loving the way you’re just losing yourself.

“Shit, I’m not gonna last much longer.” He grunts.

You feel your stomach tighten and you clench around him.

“Fuck!” He moans as you both release at the same time. He thrusts up hard one more time as you gasp.

He loosens his grip on you, and you rest your head against his chest.

“You forgot to take your rings off.” You say, looking up at him.

“Oh, baby.” He smirks and moves some hair out of your face. “I didn’t forget.” He lightly grazes his fingers over the forming bruises on your neck. “I like the way you can kind make out my initials on you.” You involuntarily tighten around him. “And I see you don’t really mind it either.”

“I feel like I should…but I’ve always liked when you leave marks on me.” You smile. “It’ll fade, it’s fine.”

He kisses you, and you both sit there making out while he’s still inside you. You roll down on him and his cock twitches. His hands move to your hips and he rocks you back and forth on him.

“Harry, will you fuck me from behind?” You say against his lips.

“Always.” He smiles.

You giggle and get off of him to lay on your stomach. He grabs ahold of you to slide in, he gets fully on top of you how you like so his chest is flush with your back. You moan as he rocks in and out of you.

“God, you’re like balls deep, it feel so good.” You grab at the pillow under you.

Harry hooks an arm under you to grab one of your breasts, his other hand pressing into your hip. You press your ass against him as he moves around in a circle.

“Fuck, Harry.”

“Yeh like when we fuck like this?” He says into your ear.

“Yes.”

“M’not crushin’ yeh?”

“Not at all.” You moan again when he thrusts deep into you. “Fuck, I’m gonna come again, oh god, right there, keep doing that.”

Harry keeps thrusting in and hitting your g-spot. You scream into your pillow and back your ass up right into him. His release comes shortly after. He lays on top of you for a few minutes before getting up. You get up to use the bathroom after he does.

You face each other as you lay in bed. Harry rubs your back and smiles at you.

“This was the perfect night, Harry.”

“Even when we almost got naked in front of our friends?”

“Especially when that happened.” You giggle. “No, but seriously. I love making these memories with you. I’ll never forget this.”

He pulls you in closer to him and rests his chin on the top of your head. You end up falling asleep like this. Ten months ago you never thought you’d be where you are right now. Being held by the person you loved most in the world, and him loving you right back.

#take it slow #harry styles #harry styles x reader #harry styles y/n #harry styles x y/n #harry styles imagine #harry styles fluff #harry styles smut #harry styles fic #harry styles fluff fic #harry styles smut fic #yeah its a shorter part #but at least we got to the concert!

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himbo-beel · 3 years

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atlas, hephaestus, medusa, labyrinth

Atlas - Favorite myth?

My favorite myth cracks me up because it's the myth of Sionnan and the salmon of wisdom. The one about how she caught or ate or something one of the salmon who fed on hazelnuts that fell into the Pot and how the water rose up and drowned her. It's very funny because my name is Shannon and my job is to grow salmon.

Hephaestus - What is your favorite form of art?

I'm gonna say it!!! It's video games!!! Looking at paintings does nothing for me. Music is fun and can give me goosebumps but it's doesn't take me away. Movies are also fun and drawings are so impressive with how they can be done digitally but video games can do all of things into one and bring me to another world!

Medusa - Do you have any pets?

Of course!

Frisk - (almost) 2 year old kitten Mustard - 3 year old crested gecko Freshwater tank - Betta named Moon Moon Saltwater tank - two midbar clownfish named Wolfgang and Amadeus and a fire goby named Mozart

Labyrinth - Do you have a good sense of direction/do you get lost easily?

I tell people I have a bad sense of direction and they never believe me. In the town I lived in for 22 years I somehow got lost on the way home from Walmart and ended up in the amusement part a whole town over. I had to call my dad to come help because I didn't have a phone that connected to the internet yet to get directions.

#me thinks

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hearthandhomemagick · 3 years

Text

Cottage Witch Journal Entry

Good Afternoon, Everyone!

It is chilly outside, and my nose has been red since the wind hit it. A warm air is wafting over my body like a blanket in my cozy little office, making me feel comfortable. My mind is filled with daydreams and thoughts of what is right and what is wrong. My center seems to be no where in sight, and yet I am calm.

I want to tell you all how my journey has been so far since my last journal entry.

Just to recap, I set some goals for myself last time. I wanted to be more aware of my eating habits, forming a work out routine to do everyday, and learn to do a split by the end of the month. These three goals are small, and have almost no real direction or layout for how they were to be conducted.

And yet, it worked. At least a little bit!

You see, I’m training my mind right now to see tracking my eating as a fun habit. I have a theory that I overthink my weight a lot of the time and completely miss the point of weight loss in general. I still get to this state of mind where if I feel as though I should feel bad for feeding myself. And this can be induced by small things people say around me. With my mind using hyperbole to hype up what they are saying, it convinces me that my eating habits are the reason they feel the way they do.

I never used to be a jealous girlfriend, I never used to be insecure, lithe in personality or even submissive. I used to be extremely dominant, defensive, independent and confident with my steps. Hell, I joined singing competitions because in my head, I knew I’d do great. But now, I bail on musical rehearsals simply because my energy isn’t right. And after last nights episode, I fucking guess I get jealous of video games now, too! Fucking stupid.

So imagine, I’ve been on this awareness journey with my eating habits. This goal being the main one I wanted to focus on this month, and have sufficiently lost a couple of pounds simply from changing the way I eat. With that being said, I’ve still felt ill about myself. So, while my boyfriend was playing Cyberpunk 2077 last night, he mentioned he loved and wanted to marry Judy because, “She’s a version of his High School self.” (as seen above. A bad bitch tech wizard who is literally the definition of independence).

Judy is a bad bitch, I’d marry her too!!! I love how sure of herself she is and how she wants a revolution. But, for some reason, this comment didn’t settle with me correctly. Regardless of my mental efforts, an actual war was going on in my head. Negative thoughts popped up about how tiny and lithe she was in stature, while being confident, distant and strong in nature, while I was a big girl who was shy, quiet and submissive/passive. I was comparing myself to a game....a game character I related to, for that matter?! I had just taken a bite of food when he said he loved her, but I stopped chewing all together the moment he said it.

The food sat in my mouth for what felt like hours as I contemplated whether it would be acceptable to just spit it in the trash, but my grandmother who lives 45 minutes out of town drove it to me because she knew it was my favorite...smoked salmon. The thoughts running through my head included, “If you don’t eat this bite, you could get skinny like Judy faster.” & “Spit it out, pig, he’s trying to tell you something.” I ended up spitting it in the trash after thirty minutes of holding it between my gums and cheek and hating on myself.

Thankfully, I STILL HAVE SALMON LEFT OVER AND WILL NEVER QUESTION WHETHER TO EAT THAT BITE OR NOT EVER AGAIN!!!! Rationalizing myself in the moment, though, was almost impossible. My boyfriend didn’t notice much because I was simply staring quietly at the TV, his voice coming in and out every once in a while followed by my curt response.

Now, this is not his fault. Him and I had a discussion a while ago regarding this and I openly said it was okay for him to talk like that in front of me about other women. I’m a feminist and love seeing women do awesome and bad ass things. I also love talking about bad ass women! He had my consent, and knows nothing of what is going on in my mind right now, so genuinely this is not a him problem.

This is a me problem. This is a me problem I have had for a very long time regarding my body issues, my mental health and my willingness to be open about it. Which I’m not. I never tell people what’s going on because not everyone is a therapist, which is what I need and cannot afford. It’s easier to not say something.

So going back to Judy. After my moment of absolute self hatred, my boyfriend mentioned something to me that seemed to pull me out of this waterfall of feelings and thoughts. He started talking to me about things we were wanting to do together.

I realized that he wasn’t thinking as hard as I was about Judy. He simply loves and enjoys the character and the interactions he has with the character. That type of woman is the type he admires. But she’s a made up fictional character. That’s when the thought hit me, “He calls you a bad bitch all the time. You guys mirrored each other quite a bit in High School. You were independent before him. Carly, you’ve started depending on an approval he doesn’t realize you are expecting. And that’s something you should be expecting from yourself.”

I put weight in the words of a man who thought his sentence was light as a feather. Things started clicking and I couldn’t help the giggle that escaped my mouth. I had just spit food out over a situation I had created in my head. I would be Judy today if I were in a post-apocalyptic world, had I not put so much weight into depending on others for things, I would probably be Judy in todays Rona Revolution! The point is, Judy is a set of characteristics dressed up and made pretty for the success of a video game. No one is exactly like her because she isn’t real.

But I am. And personality is a choice. No, I won’t change myself, but I want to be more myself. I want to be the me uninfluenced by others opinions of me. I want to be the me that can alternate from being prissy to being tomboy. So, I want to make a list of things that make me truly happy. I want to lay out the part of me that I love, and I want to strive to accomplish more of the things I love.

1. Fixing my own car. I was told in High School that shop class was a boys class. It was my first option as a recreational hour, and they decided to put me in something else. I slowly lost interest in vehicles as a whole and pushed it to the side, depending on everyone else to fix my car for me. This is bullshit, and I want to fix my own fucking car from now on. It won’t get done otherwise.

2. MMA Fighting/Boxing. Like my piano career, this dream stopped once my teacher stopped showing up. I want to defend myself and be physically strong, I also want to say I went through something rigorous without giving up. I want this for me, myself and I. I’m tired of calling people in parking lots at night when I’m scared.

3. Yoga. I brought this up in my last post, I bring it up again because this a priority of mine that goes unnoticed frequently. I need this physical practice for my mental health, I always feel happier and healthier when I can do yoga, so there’s no excuse for me to NOT invest in this.

4. Independence. I don’t need anyone, who is in my life is here because I want them here. I don’t need anyone to make money for me, I’ll work. I don’t need anyone to tell me I’m beautiful, I know. I don’t need people telling me what to wear, it’s my choice. I want to be myself again, not everyone else collectively.

5. Music/Art. This is a part of my soul that heals with the hit of the play button. It should have never stopped being at the forefront of my life.

6. Reading and Writing. I don’t give myself time to do this, yet I have plenty of time to do everything. I don’t know what I’m waiting for, but boredom ain’t it sis! This is how I process my thoughts and organize my mind, so it should be imperative.

7. Self-Love Rituals. I want to start putting effort into rituals that mean something to me and my craft. This includes bath rituals, cooking or baking rituals, or even smoke rituals. Either way, it’s a portion of my craft I neglect, and shouldn’t.

8. Go places by myself and face my anxiety. I always shoved my anxiety to the side and trained my brain to replace it with excitement. It worked for a long time, and then I lost my confidence and Independence. I need to focus on myself to accomplish this one. But I shouldn’t be nervous or scared going into public to get shit I want or need. Period. No one is focusing on me, so why should I focus on them?

9. Sing in my car. I was recorded while singing passionately in my car twice this year. My anxious mind claimed they were making fun of me, and one was indeed laughing at me. BUT FUCK IT. Who cares if they record me or make fun of me or not? Why am I stopping my happiness because you think it’s funny? Fuck that, I’m too bad of a bitch to be worried about people who waste their time in that manner. I’ll give them a show next time. I refuse to be the victim anymore to anyone, including myself.

There is nothing stopping me except myself from pursuing the things in life that make me happy. Being aware of my own state of mind helped me realize this. And typing this out has helped me truly start the process of change for the better.

As for my actual monthly goals; they are still in tact! Again, making myself aware of my eating has forced me to be mindful of the things I put into my body, including drinks. As a result of better habits forming, I’ve dropped a few pounds. Losing weight is not the goal, but the result of accomplishing my goal. As for exercise, I have started small by working on my legs and glutes. I have been doing up to 20 Jump Squats every day or every other day. This, of course, isn’t a routine, but it is progress from where I was doing nothing. As a result, my booty and thighs have been looking good and my number of squats has been going up! I haven’t created anything yoga wise yet, but anticipate on forming something sustainable once I have gotten into the habit of my squats. Saving $100 was not the best goal to set for the month of December (not the wisest move of a notorious over spender on gifts) BUT I still want this to happen, so! Rather than worrying about saving $100, I will focus on making sure I survive this month without over drafting. I already have and am in the negatives by 80 something dollars, but for the rest of the month, and into next year, I will shut down my checking account with that bank, keep my savings, and start using that as my emergency debit card.

I’m doing better. I’m noticing progress. It’s small, but worth the tiniest amount of effort. I still struggle, and I will in the future, but right now I’m doing well. I will continue this journey with pride.

I also want to learn more in regards to shadow work, and incorporating my craft into my workout routines, so if any of you actually reads this and has any ideas, let me know! Being healthy is the main goal!!!!!

I appreciate those who read this or support it or even relate to it a bit. My last entry received a nasty comment, explaining how I was a basic bitch who needed to be educated and needed to stay out of the thinspo tag. For anyone who feels compelled to do that, just know you are much more emotionally invested in it than I am at that point. I simply don’t give 1, 2 or even 3 types of fucks about it. I’m doing this for me, if you follow then thank you, but if not then thank you for kindly leaving me alone.

I want to be me. Me alone, me without help, me with me. I still want to be with my boyfriend, and I know I have his support here, but this is my battle and I can’t rely on him to fix me or make me feel like me again. I am responsible for myself.

I’m doing better, and will continue to do so! Just let me know you guys’ thoughts, ideas or even experiences you may have went/are going through like this. I appreciate you all!

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mysmedrabbles · 5 years

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RFA Comforting an MC with Terrible Period Pains

requested: by anonymous

a/n: oh my god the header is a MOOD for this ask. enJOY and hAVE FUN READING THIS therES SO MUCHCOFFEEINMYSYSTEMHHHHH want to support my period-ic writing ayy see what i did there? then feel free to buy me a coffee!

warnings: aside from that terrible pun you just witnessed? n/a

-AAAAAAAARRRGHHHHHH mod alex

Jumin

-he finds you clutching your stomach, sweat beading your forehead as you move from uncomfortable position to uncomfortable position, mastering positions he’d figured only Elizabeth the III could do

-worry creases his forehead as he rushes to your side, touching your side gingerly, almost scared that you’ll crumble under his fingers, but all you do is let out a pained groan, unable to speak as the pounding in your head grows louder with each stab through your gut

- “mC aRe YoU dYiNg???”

-through pained gesturing, he finally understands that you’re not dying, just going through a torture worse than death

-has no idea what to do, just lays down with you, holding your hand and rubbing soothing circles on your back

-as soon as you finally fall asleep, he’s calling the doctor, wanting a professionals opinion on how best to lessen your pain

-poor doctor in his mind is probably like, “you,,,could have looked this up,,, on your phone,, that you used,,, to call me,,,,,,,, at 1 IN THE MORNING”

-he feels awkward, not being able to help you with more than a hot bottle on your stomach and keeping you company, running his hands through your hair and massaging your temples as he sits with you, helping you the only way he knows how, by rambling about the stock market

-at some point you tune out what he’s saying, focusing on his voice and the comforting patterns hes tracing on your skin

-you can bet that he buys you the most expensive german chocolate, anything that you want, anything you crave will be imported right away and be on your front doorstep the next morning

-he most likely has a calendar app on his phone where he keeps approximate track of your cycle so that he’s always prepared to give you extra special attention and care

-when he goes on business trips that last longer than a week, he has a box specifically made, kind of like a care package containing but not limited to:

-the finest chocolate (10 different kinds! with a surplus of your favourite!)

-those emergency hospital crack-and-place heat packets, good to keep on your lower back and uterus

-oranges and broccoli (though these tend to be in the fridge)

-with a small note on how much he loves you and will see you tonight on call, telling you to take care of yourself and leaving the doctors phone number in case of an emergency

Jaehee

-she KNOWS the pain,, she K N O W S

-im not saying that at some point your cycles start happening at the same time, but thats exactly what I’m saying (i have no idea how this happens irl but it does and?? idk its odd)

-so generally the two of you are sitting home together, laying sprawled on the couch, 4 Ibuprofen between the two of you as you watch Zen’s old musicals, watching Jaehee sleepily hum along as she holds you against her chest, stroking your hair and bringing up your hand to her mouth, kissing your knuckles as the two of you fall asleep together

-she knows you have a harder time than her when your period rolls around, so she has a tendency to insist that you don’t stress yourself out at work, keeping you mostly behind the counter where you’re not carrying hot liquids for too long.

-helping you out whenever she can, hugging you from behind as you struggle to stand on your feet, giving you momentary support as she takes the cup from your hands, instructing you to sit down

-no one has ever seen her so lenient with someone when it comes to work

-you log onto the server to gush about Jaehee, posting pictures of her running around at work, helping customers, “ThAtS mY wIFe Y’aLL”

-she has a special coffee brew that she only breaks out when you’re in severe pain, added her secret ingredient (which she refuses to tell you about) that somehow make everything better

-practically begging her to judo kick you in the spine because goddamnit it hurts so bad (she doesn't, opting for a soothing massage instead)

-kisses and cuddles galore, she puts the care in “caring for you,” to the point where she doesn't complain about her own mediocre periods upon seeing just how bad the pain is with you (please take care of her anyways she deserves the best)

Yoosung

-listen,, this boy grew up with sisters and a mother, he’s practically a pro when it comes to helping you out

-the second he sees you rush into the restroom in a panic, he’s already getting the pill bottle and hot bottle out, doing the bed the way you like it and pulling out your favourite blanket and warm stuffed animal

-insists to take care of you the whole time, and is willing to skip school to stay home with you,, its only after threatening him from the bed, wagging your finger weakly at him does he actually go, however he’s one to send you worrying text messages through the whole day, and silly photos of a leaf he saw or a funny cat meme

-he cooks for you like theres no tomorrow, and is always extremely apologetic when he gets home an hour later than normal due to grocery shopping, only to find you having finally fallen asleep, stuffed animal discarded neatly on the bedside table, hugging his pillow instead

-his eyes soften, heartrate slowing down as he gazes on your sleeping form

-trying his best not to disturb you, he tiptoes out of the room, getting your favourite dinner ready, and trying his best to make something with your preferred chocolate

-you hobble out of the room sleepily, the smell of food drawing you to the kitchen

-he’ll immediately drop everything, running to you as he helps you to a chair, chiding you for getting up and straining yourself when you could have just called for him

-playing video games together lazily, him joking that he should let you win, but this just drives you to beat his ass in mariokart, absolutely demolishing him with no mercy

-he sits there shell shocked as you sit next to him grinning

Seven

-he’s versed in over five languages, survived the worst years of his life, is number one in the Shooting Star Server, the best hacker on the planet, and yet he has no preparation on how to help you through periods

-he knows the basics, but seeing you in such pain makes him rethink everything he thought he knew

-he sees you constantly shifting, arching your back in a vain attempt to crack it, crack any bone for momentary relief, and decides this is his time to shine and help you somewhat

-he gives the best back massages, working the pressure points on your lower back, and getting out all the knots in your shoulders, pressing kisses to your shoulder blades as he goes along, fingers working on the entirety of your back.

-shares his Honey Buddha Chips with you, even letting you take three or more bags, as long as you promise to not waste any that is.

-keeps you away from spicy foods, dairy and phD pepper, his technical knowledge had gotten him that far at least, and even though you’re more than happy to eat junk food for a week straight, for the first time ever he insists on eating better, giving you foods such as salmon and oranges,, only after heavy persuasion and multiple times of you threatening him does he let you have chocolate

-he stays with you the whole time, making sure you’re laughing and taking care of yourself, trying his best to ease the pain with terrible terrible jokes and horrible Saeran impressions

-he knows that you dont like having a heating pad on your stomach because its so weird barely being able to move and having to stay in one place, so he places his laptop on your stomach, letting it overheat on your pelvic area as the two of you play fireboy and watergirl

Zen

-before we start i just wanna say Zen is 100% the type of guy who would hold no disgust or immature “ew thats icky”type attitude to the thought of buying his s/o menstrual products and he looks down on any man that does have that attitude

-he’s not quite versed in how to help you, but he’s a fast learner, and would rather rely on your own reactions to his help and seeing what works for you as opposed to just asking the void that is the internet what is supposed to help

-he’s one to carry you everywhere while you’re on your period, not letting you strain yourself for fear you’ll get off balance, fall and hurt yourself, and he’s constantly referencing you as his prince(ss), even more than usual

-singing you to sleep, letting his melodious voice wash over you as he holds you close, letting his natural body warmth keep you warm

-strokes your hair as you lay down, exhausted from all the pain, your body physically not able to stay awake anymore, practically blacking out

-if you cry, he’ll hold you, massaging your back and whispering soft comforts in your ear, but inside he’s pained by the distress this is causing you, and is mainly frustrated that he can’t do more

-sometimes he wakes up early in the morning to go for a jog or get breakfast for the two of you, and he’ll leave multiple sticky notes with sweet messages, ensuring that he’ll be back soon and to take it easy until he’s back home

-this man with Refuse to let you strain yourself in Any way, and will drop Everything to run over if he sees you so much as bending over to pick up something, practically throwing himself over the dropped item and insisting to pick it up for you

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bongaboi · 4 years

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Liverpool: 2019-20 Premier League Champions

30 years of hope: my life as an ardent Liverpool fan

After three decades of near misses, slips and tears, the Merseyside team’s wait for another league title is nearly over. So what does it mean to a scouser and lifelong fan?

by Hannah Jane Parkinson

I am three years old in the photograph, hugging a plastic, flyaway football. I am seven, arriving tentatively for my first training session at a local girls’ club. I am bounding back to my mother’s car, blowing hot breath on cold hands, beaming, the salt from the artificial turf embedded in the soles of my trainers.

I am eight and glued to the television, watching teen wunderkind and my Liverpool hero, Michael Owen, score the perfect goal against Argentina in World Cup 98.

I am nine. I give up one of the few days I have to visit my father to attend my first ever match at Anfield, Liverpool FC’s famous stadium. A week later, my father dies. These two events are inextricably linked in my mind, and the guilt continues to whichever day you are reading this.

I am 10 and make my first appearance in print in a feature for the local paper, the Liverpool Echo, about girls getting into football. I am quoted as saying that all my sister cares about is boys and fashion.

Twelve years old and the fuzzy letters of “Parkinson” on the back of my shirt arch down my shoulder blades.

I am 13. Our team, known as Liverpool Feds, are approached by Liverpool FC to become their official girls’ outfit. We visit Melwood, the first team’s training ground. The full-size goals loom like scaffolding.

I am 14. My hero, Owen, makes the same move to Real Madrid that Steve McManaman made five years before him. This breaks my heart. Suddenly, all I care about is boys and fashion. Without really making a decision, I give up football. Cold winter nights are spent inside on the sofa watching Sex and the City. I discover live music and MySpace.

I am 15. I own the entire range of Clearasil products. A group of my schoolfriends and I take a night off GCSE revision to watch the 2005 European Champions League final in Istanbul; the first the club has reached since the mid-80s, and so it is forbidden not to watch. Liverpool are losing by three goals at half time. A lost cause. Minds wander to the second biology paper… But wait. Liverpool pull back to 3-3. And win on penalties. Pandemonium. We join the throng in the streets; the blaring car horns; the beer jumping, like salmon, from pint glasses; the embrace of strangers; the straining vocal cords.

I am 18 and living in Russia, watching games on my first-generation smartphone via a 2G internet connection. Each time a player goes through on goal the signal drops to endless buffering. Liverpool finish second in the league, four points behind bitter rivals Manchester United.

I am 26, we are bearing down on the title. Steven Gerrard in an impromptu on-pitch team talk, after a crucial win against the newly flush Manchester City, shouts hoarsely at his players: “This does not fucking slip now!” The next home game, Gerrard – one of the best players the club has ever seen, captain, scouser, Liverpool FC lifer – literally slips on the turf against Chelsea to concede a goal. We lose. Manchester City finish top of the league by two points.

I am 29. I am in Cuba, where the internet is heavily censored. But I manage to watch the last game of the season, which will be decisive. Liverpool finish the league with 97 points; the highest points tally ever for a team that doesn’t win the title. City win again. With 98 points. Liverpool do, however, win the Champions League – for the sixth time – after scoring four goals in a sublime semi-final comeback against Barcelona. The injured Mohamed Salah, watching on the bench, wears a T-shirt bearing the slogan “Never Give Up”. The T-shirt sells out.

I am 30. I have never witnessed my beloved Liverpool FC lift the title. Two months from now, this is going to change. As I write Liverpool have a 22-point lead at the top of the table. Of 84 points available this season, they have taken 79. Next Monday is the derby against Everton.

I want to untangle what this will mean to me – the fan who met Steven Gerrard a couple of years ago, grinning like a child; the fan who, two weeks ago, was unbelievably touched when current star Trent Alexander-Arnold recorded a video message to cheer her up during a bad time. What it means to other fans: those who witnessed the dominance of the 1980s, and the younger ones who have known only disappointment. And what it means, too, for the future of the area of Anfield itself.

It’s late February in the Flat Iron pub, one of the many dotted around Anfield. Steve Dodd, who is 49, is with his friends Dan Wynn, 26, and Gerrard Noble, 47. All from Somerset, they are having a pre-match drink before the home game against West Ham. Steve talks of the current Jürgen Klopp-assembled side as the best Liverpool side he thinks he’s ever seen.

The friends have been scouring the internet for places to stay in the city for the last home fixture of the season, but to no avail. “Rooms are going for £400 a night,” Gerrard says, his eyes widening. He and Steve are allowing themselves to get excited, but Dan, who like me has yet to experience a league title win, looks anxious and rubs his thighs. “No,” he says, “I don’t want to jinx it. Though I’ve been kicked out of various WhatsApp groups for being smug about all the results.” Steve tells me they weren’t prepared for it, this three-decade-long wait: “I just thought we’d go on winning.”

We talk about how important it is that Klopp’s politics match the club: Liverpool is a leftwing city; Liverpool is a leftwing club. At the last election, Labour retained all of its 14 MPs on Merseyside. The city has never forgiven the Tories for former chancellor Geoffrey Howe’s strategy of “managed decline”. Thatcher is a hated figure. But so is Derek Hatton, the former city council deputy leader and member of the Marxist group Militant. Last month, Italy’s rightwing politician Matteo Salvini was forced to deny that he had pulled out of a visit to Liverpool after the metropolitan region’s mayor called him a “fascist”. During several games last year, chants rang out for Jeremy Corbyn. The current prime minister conspicuously avoids visiting. As Gareth Robertson, who is a part of the immensely popular The Anfield Wrap podcast, with more than 200,000 weekly downloads in 200 countries, puts it to me: “Not only do we want a good football coach, we expect almost a political leader, someone who gets us, and our city, its values.” Humorously, there have been petitions for Liverpool to become a self-determined scouse state, and “Scouse not English” is a frequent terrace chant.

The club has a mantra: “This means more.” It pisses off other teams and is, understandably, dismissed as marketing speak. But isn’t it true? Isn’t the 127-year-old club what people think of when anyone, anywhere in the world, mentions “Liverpool”? The famous football team that plays in red – allowing for the Beatles, of course.

The city has another team, the blue of Everton. I have nothing against Everton. I consider Everton fellow scousers and too little a threat to focus animosity towards. In a way, the clubs are unruly siblings; we love and scrap in equal measure. Totally different personalities, but born of the same streets.

Four years ago, a man named Jürgen Klopp arrived on these streets. Or more accurately, he arrived in the suburb of Formby, renting the house from his managerial predecessor, Brendan Rodgers. Klopp is the football manager that even non-football fans like. He’s Ludovico Einaudi, seducing those previously uninterested in classical music. He is a man of principle; a baseball cap permanently affixed to his head, as though at any point he might be required to step up to the plate on a blindingly sunny day. Perhaps for the Boston Red Sox, owned by Liverpool FC’s American proprietor, John W Henry.

Klopp is erudite. He is proudly anti-Brexit in a city that voted 58% Remain. “For me, Brexit makes no sense at all,” he has said. He is a socialist: “I am on the left … I believe in the welfare state. I’m not privately insured. I would never vote for a party because they promised to lower the top tax rate. If there’s something I will never do in my life it is vote for the right.” He grew up in a humble village in Germany’s Black Forest, and it shows. There’s a saying in the region: “the hair in the soup”. It means focusing on even the tiniest things that can be improved.

He has the good looks of one of my favourite 1960s Russian film stars, Aleksandr Demyanenko. He hugs his players as though they were the loves of his life and he might never see them again. Journalists like him for his press-conference banter as well as his eloquence. He visits children in hospitals. He is funny. When Mario Götze, one of his star players at former club Borussia Dortmund, left for Pep Guardiola’s Bayern Munich, his explanation was: “He’s leaving because he’s Guardiola’s favourite. If it’s anyone’s fault, it’s mine. I can’t make myself shorter and learn Spanish.”

Liverpool have had many famous managers, of course. Bill Shankly (there’s a statue of him outside the ground); Bob Paisley (ditto); Kenny Dalglish. But Klopp is already being talked of as one of the best ever.

Liverpool the city has evolved from its shamefully prominent role in the slave trade – in common with other major British ports – to a place with a diverse population and a well-won reputation for being friendly and welcoming. But the tragedy and scandal of Hillsborough, in which 96 fans were crushed to death in 1989 at Sheffield Wednesday’s ground, is etched into the nation’s sporting history, and its social justice record. After a 27-year-long battle to clear the names of the Liverpool fans whose reputations were smeared, after inquests that lasted two years – the longest case heard by a jury in British legal history – a verdict of unlawful killing was returned. But, as Margaret Aspinall of the indefatigable Hillsborough Family Support Group pointed out, after David Duckenfield, police commander at the ground, was cleared of manslaughter last year, no one has yet been found accountable for those killings.

The Sun, which categorically did not report “The Truth”, as the infamous headline went, but was found to have published untruths that blamed Liverpool fans for the disaster, is a red-top pariah here. The paper is the bestselling national in print, but shifts a measly 12,000 or so copies on Merseyside. A branch of Sainsbury’s was once found to be selling copies under the counter, as though they were counterfeit cigarettes. It’s a boycott that has lasted longer than many marriages.

The socially progressive values of the club extend to it supporting an end to period poverty – free sanitary products are available in every women’s loo at Anfield. Last month, the Reds Going Green initiative saw the installation of organic machines to break down food waste into water. The club even has its own allotment, which grows food to serve to fans in the main stand. It was the first Premier League club to be officially involved with an LGBT Pride event in 2012, at the invitation of Paul Amann. Amann tells me how he set up the LGBT supporters group, Kop Outs, because: “It’s essential that our voices are heard, our presence is welcomed and respected.” The group works alongside the Spirit of Shankly supporters’ group and the Fans Supporting Foodbanks initiative and has regular meet-ups. These things mean something to me: a football fan as a girl, and now as a woman. A woman who dates other women. A woman who doesn’t want to hear homophobic chants on the terraces. Or, it goes without saying, racist ones. Jamie Carragher, ex-player and pundit, has apologised on behalf of the club for its backing of striker Luis Suárez, who was banned from playing for eight matches in 2011 for making racist comments. “We made a massive mistake,” Carragher said. “What message do you send to the world? Supporting someone being banned because he used some racist words.”

Back on the pitch, some of this season’s performances have been, quite simply, balletic. Others as powerful and muscular as a weightlifting competition. Formations as beautiful as constellations. Forward surges as though our fullbacks were plugged into the mains. Possibly the best fullbacks playing today: 21-year-old local lad Trent Alexander-Arnold (known just as Trent) and the fiery Scot Andy Robertson (Robbo) are spoken about by pundits as innovators. Gary Lineker and I text, rapturously, about the two of them.

For a football team to be consistent, for a team to win the league, it must be capable of winning in many different ways. The aesthetically pleasing playing out from the back. Lightning counter-attacks. Scraping 1-0 wins in the final minutes (and, particularly at the start of this season, we have done a lot of that. It’s something Manchester United used to do in their 90s pomp, and naturally, I hated them for it). Mindful of the trauma of The Slip, the agreed club line is “one game at a time”, said again and again, as another scouse son, Pete Burns, once sang: “like a record baby, right round, round, round… ” And my God, how many of those we’ve smashed. The current side is the first in England to hold an international treble (the Champions League; Uefa Super Cup; Fifa Club World Cup). We have not lost a home game for almost two calendar years. Shortly, we’ll no doubt break the record for the earliest title win during a season; the most points across Europe’s top five leagues.

It is, even to the neutral, extraordinary stuff. It is, even to the haters, albeit grudgingly, extraordinary stuff. In 2016, one of the greatest stories of modern football was the previously mediocre Leicester City winning a surprise title. Liverpool’s dominance this season surpasses that for drama. It is watching history in the present.

Being at a game at Anfield is like being high while ingesting nothing. The stands seem to have lungs. Though You’ll Never Walk Alone has become supremely emotional, an anthem for strength and perseverance post-Hillsborough (“walk on through the wind / walk on through the rain”) it’s a song originally from the musical Carousel. It was a standout 1963 cover version by Liverpudlian band Gerry and the Pacemakers that kicked off its adoption at Anfield. “It’s got a lot of lovely major-to-minor changes at often unexpected moments that have the effect of emotionally blindsiding you,” music journalist Pete Paphides says (although he’s a United fan, so feel free to discount everything he tells me). “But it’s also obviously very hymnal, with a chorus which invites that religious ambiguity. It was Aretha Franklin’s version that John Peel played after Hillsborough and rendered himself incapable of carrying on by virtue of doing so.”

Anfield has always been something special; players from countless teams often talk of it being the greatest ground they have ever played at. Or the most intimidating. Or the most electric. But of late, there’s an extra buoyancy. The crowd salivates.

Watching the game against West Ham, we take the lead within 10 minutes, but they quickly equalise, before going ahead. We score twice more. It is our 21st consecutive home win, setting a Premier League-era record. At the end of the game, Klopp and his players applaud the Kop end, fans’ eyes glistening with both emotion and wind chill (“walk on, through the wind… ”)

Adjacent to the stadium at the redbrick Albert pub, Clara, Tom, John – all in their 20s, students, and local – and John’s dad, David, who is 53, are cheering the last-ditch win. I repeat what I asked Steve and his friends: just how excited should we all be?

“Very fucking excited,” says John. “Very fucking excited,” Tom concurs. (Scousers use swear words as ellipses. And the speed of Liverpudlian patter matches the rat-a-tat-tat of freestyle rappers.) The Albert is floor-to-ceiling in flags; unassuming from the outside, iconic inside. Across the road at the Park – the “Established 1888” sign above its door – it is Where’s Wally? levels of rammed, entirely usual for a match day. But the mood is as disbelieving as triumphant. It hasn’t happened yet, but it already feels as though people are waiting to be shaken awake from a dream. Around the corner, posters at another fan favourite, the Sandon, advertise a huge end-of-season victory party. I grab a burger at the Kop of the Range, a kebab joint not far from a scarf stall that has seen its business rocket over the past three years.

My Uber driver, Mohamed, 35, moved to the city from Sri Lanka. A massive Salah fan, he tells me his own revenue booms when the club win a game – happier fans means higher fares. “People don’t want to spend money on a loss,” he says. “If we win, the whole mood lifts. You can feel it in the car. Though when you start driving with Uber, they tell you not to mention what football team you support. Because football means a lot to people. There are many feelings involved with football.”

It’s unsurprising to me that even back in Sri Lanka, Mohamed was a fan. Liverpool is a global behemoth. The richest club in the UK outside Manchester.

A £1.7bn valuation; £533m turnover; pre-tax profits of £42m. Matchday ticket revenues increased (thanks to a regenerated £110m main stand). Visiting the club shop, there is LFC-branded gin; babygros; even a Hello Kitty tie-in range. As Richard Haigh at consultants Brand Finance tells me, next season’s kit deal with Nike is “expected to represent the largest in history. Brands will be willing to pay to have some magic dust of LFC.” There are official stores as far afield as Dubai and Bangkok.

John W Henry has won the support of the fans for his positive handling of the club. And yet, despite this huge wealth, Anfield is the 10th most deprived neighbourhood in the country. Boarded-up houses surround the stadium. The club has not covered itself in glory in the past, accused of buying up properties in unscrupulous ways. But it is hoped that local enterprises, such as the community-run Homebaked cake shop and new housing association properties, will make the neighbourhood better.

Last week, we were knocked out of the FA Cup in a match against Chelsea. Or, as I call that fixture, Kensington versus Kensington. (In Liverpool’s “Kenny”, 98% of residents are among the most deprived 5% nationally. In London’s, residents earn three times the national average.)

In the league, there has been a blip. Last weekend we finally lost. And we lost 3-0 to, with the greatest respect, Watford; not a bad side, but a side ensconced in a relegation battle. Arsenal, who once went a whole season unbeaten (“the Invincibles”), and are keen to keep that record, tweeted from the official club account: “Phew!”

But I am not panicking. It’s possible Dan from the Flat Iron is panicking. But Klopp isn’t panicking. In typical fashion, he said the fact we played an absolutely awful game of football was “rather positive… ”

“A couple of years ago,” our hero reminds us, “I said we wanted to write our own stories and create our own history, and obviously the boys took what I said really seriously. It is so special. The numbers are incredible.” In a nod to Sir Alex Ferguson’s famous line that his greatest challenge was “knocking Liverpool right off their fucking perch”, Liverpool chief executive Peter Moore says now: “We are back on our perch.” As The Anfield Wrap’s Gareth says: “In a dream scenario, a period of dominance follows. Not so long ago that dream was just that. Now, it’s a reality that is much easier to imagine.”

Four more games. Eyes on the prize. For me, at last, 30 years in the making, eyes on the prize.

#2020 #premier league #ynwa #liverpool fc #you'll never walk alone

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simpsonssitcom · 4 years

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Character Design (Pt. 1)

The Main Family

I want to preface this by saying I already wrote a post about the designs in this AU, but it was vague, uncertain, and most importantly, deleted by a tumblr glitch after a couple of days. This is an updated version of that. I also won’t put at many pictures; I’ll try to just name episodes and/or condense photos into a collage for a single character.

Anyways, this post is about changes to the design of the main family. Anything not addressed will remain the same. These will also only cover standard, present, everyday designs. Special clothes and flashback designs will be addressed as they come up.

Marge

Marge’s physical changes might be the least drastic. Her hair, still blue, will be one “head” smaller. By this I am referring to her pages in “The Simpsons Handbook: Secret Tips From The Pros.” Marge’s hair is broken into three sections: around her head, one head size above, and another head size above. Let’s level that down to only one “head” above. She’s not hiding rabbit ears anymore, we can do this. As for her outfit, I had a little trouble in deliberation, but I’ve decided on it mostly being the same, except her green dress has a sleeveless turtleneck on top like her orange peplum dress. This is mainly due to her job as a cashier now; her apron would look weird over a tube dress and I wanted her to have the same outfit at work (like how Homer wears a tie over his normal shirt at work). She has two bracelets like her early design (from her sisters) and still has her necklace. I considered maybe adding the flowers from her early design to her dress. After all, she has an art streak not just in painting but in sewing (think of her cute modifications to her pink Chanel outfit) and adding her own pattern onto the dress to “spice things up a bit” would be such a Marge thing. Still, I didn’t want to made her design too busy, and I also didn’t think flowers were super Marge. She’s more into classic looks and solid colors, I think.

Homer

Anyways, Homer’s shirt is pink now! I outlined a ton of reasons for my Homer outfit decision in the original post, but I’ll make it brief. It’s mostly that pink was a strong color in the early stages of the show, that Homer isn’t as aggressive in this AU, and that we know pink with blue (his jeans) is a good color combo on him from his outfit in Stark Raving Dad, his prom outfit, and his suit at Lisa’s wedding. Speaking of Lisa’s Wedding, his bodily appearance will closer resembling that of that episode. It’s only a five year timeskip so he won’t be too different (no eye wrinkles for example), but he’ll be more top heavy, his shoulders and neck getting larger to even out his pear shaped beer belly we have now. His hair will be deteriorating too, instead of a zig-zag on the sides, it’s just individual strands.

Maggie

The children will change the most, as obviously they are growing up. They’ll get taller and their hair will change too to better distinguish them. Maggie’s got fairly consistent hair in her future appearances: longer and parted with three spikes in front and 4-5 in back, depending on the episode. Her hair isn’t that long yet at 5, but it’s certainly parted already. Her face, to help distinguish her from Lisa, has a mouth more like (younger) Homer’s, with the curved upper lip.

So, I have something I’ve added as part of Maggie’s character which I’m only mentioning on this post because it helps inform her design. I am autistic and, although I know there’s a running gag in future episodes that she’s apparently talks a lot, here Maggie is nonverbal autistic. Anyways, I’m bringing this up because of my #1 favorite in-show future Maggie design choice: her pacifier necklace. You wanna know why? Stim jewelry. Now, Maggie has a necklace like Lisa or Marge, but hers only has one bead, and she sucks or chews on it sometimes to stim. Next, what do to about the onesie? I’d like to keep it something comfortable, maybe very loose, because that gag of Maggie constantly dripping over her own clothes can be kinda funny (so long as it doesn’t seriously hurt her, I never liked that trend of just tagging on characters for no reason) A blue sweater (looking like the top half of her onesie) and some bootcut jeans that are too long for her legs is essentially what I wore at that age, why can’t she do the same? All that matters is that she’s comfy.

Lisa

Okay, we gotta talk about Lisa’s dress. A middle school girl in a strapless dress? Has the world gone mad? Yes it has, but in the American public school system, that’s not gonna fly. So what do we do, put straps on her dress or give her a whole new outfit? After a lot of consideration, I decided on a skirt the same color as her dress (blood orange, or is it “fucking red”?) with the spiky bottom too, with a lavender polo. Why lavender? Well, Bart’s imagination in “O, Brother, Where Bart Thou?” gives us a good look at that color combo (complete with white neck accessory) on someone with the almost exact same features as Lisa. We also see Lisa’s dress with straps, which looks okay for adult Lisa, but there’s too much cleavage for what I’d consider putting on a thirteen year old.

In addition to getting taller, like all of the Simpsons children, Lisa’s hair is changing, but it’s nothing we haven’t seen before. In a all her future appearances (much like Maggie, likely to help differentiate since they’re almost identical when grown), her hair is always styled one way: pushed back and down. But specifically I’m going to draw her hair design from, you guessed it, Lisa’s Wedding! What can I say, it’s just a good episode for character design... mostly. But I love the way her hair starts to curl in that episode. If we take the curl as coming from Marge, it’d make sense if she grew to look more like her parents.

Bart

Alright, Bartman! Bartholomew is probably getting the most change, hence why I put him last. After all, he’s changed a lot in the show too (the color of his shirt from blue to... again, is it orange or red?) and his future appearances arguably vary the most. His hair is interesting, because although the design I’ve settled on for it matched fairly close to his 15-year-old self in Barthood, it’s actually based off of the music video for Deep Deep Trouble. He got his head shaved as punishment, and since I saw it I HCed that this happens whenever Bart gets in big trouble, so his hair is constantly a buzzcut because it’s always just growing out. As he matures a bit and doesn’t get caught as often, he can grow his hair out more. As for height... although most of his aged up appearances have him keep that pear shape to look like Homer, I figure since he has a bit more of an active lifestyle, he would shed some baby fat. I particularly liked his lanky look in that one “2006-2013 Family Portrait” couch gag, where he just kinda... stretches. It makes him look like he took after Marge some, which I like.

Clothes are fun. Bart has always been a rebel, and a very creative kid, and I wouldn’t be surprised if he started expressing himself in his clothes more. His lucky red cap and his earring from Simpson tide would almost certainly appear more, but in terms of his clothes, a simple orange shirt won’t cut it anymore. The bright orange might be too close to homer’s salmon pink or Lisa’s warm red, I’m altering the shade to be more brick. The shirt itself will be a floral button up (the pattern being his classic orange and OG blue as an homage) inspired by his clothes in Homer’s Phobia, Bart to The Future (where he also has an earring), and this post by @springfieldblues, which I love.

That’s it for part one! Part two will focus on the nature of how character design will function in this AU as a whole, as well as changes to more minor characters.

#the simpsons #bart simpson #lisa simpson #maggie simpson #homer simpson #marge simpson #character design #simpsons au

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