#and i just got...Almost triggered again a few minutes ago (not from anything on this website) so im just kinda mmhmmm okkkkkayyyyyyyyy

[paintyoureyeswithavividmind]

close to home | chapter sixty four

close to home | chapter sixty four

plot: time continues to move on for the reader

series masterlist

Pairing: Eventual Daryl Dixon x f!reader Word Count: 3,214 Warnings: violence, blood, typical twd, the passing of a beloved pet A/N: thank you for reading!! This chapter is going to feature the death of Tora. I know how much you all love her, but with all the time jumps and to continue this story, cats unfortunately do not live that long. I apologize if this is going to be trigger, and if it makes any of you feel better, I based Tora on my cat who is only 3, and I was sobbing writing this as well. So as a little pick me up, there is the beautiful and loving cat that I based Tora off of (and my bookshelf lol) at the end of this chapter

Weeks turned into months as you and Daryl worked on coming back together. By early spring, you were even more in love with and fully committed to him again. You trusted him again, which seemed to elevate Daryl in unexpected ways. He was more open with the kids and even Michonne and took a seat on the council--you declined Michonne’s offer for the hundredth time. 

By late summer, you were happier and healthier after Daryl returned to you. It was coming up on a year since you’d reunited with him, and things were almost perfect again. 

Almost.

With Tora’s age, you had her out of commission. She wasn’t allowed outside the walls, and stairs were getting too hard for her to climb. You or Daryl would have to bring her up and down. She was getting older after all these years, and you knew she wouldn’t make it to the end of the year. So you spent as much time with her as you could. She followed you around the community, cuddled with you and Daryl every night, and even with Dog. You had Siddiq look at her, of course, and you knew she was having kidney issues. But you could do nothing about it until she started showing pain.

Despite Daryl telling you it was a bad idea, you visited with Negan a few times every now and then. You meant what you said to him years ago, that you were moving past things and letting go of the anger. That meant there was room for a tiny bit of guilt for him spending the rest of his life in a cell, not that you thought he should be let out. But you went down to talk to him, and he was never an asshole to you. For whatever reason, he respected your marriage to Daryl and told you he just liked having someone to talk to. 

You knew Judith was doing the same but didn’t say anything. And Judith was Judith; she would do what she wanted anyway, just like her brother and father. 

Which was why Michonne agreed to let you and a group take her out for a hunt. She was nine now, and Michonne knew how important it was for her to know the ins and outs of the area around the community. She trusted you with Judith’s life. 

So you had Rosita, Eugene, Laura, and Aaron come out with you, as they did most of the out-of-community work anyway. Daryl was needed to help build up one of the new farming stands, so you couldn’t have him come. 

You were meant to meet them in a few minutes at the gate and could hear Judith bumping around in her room while getting ready. The two of you never seemed to get anywhere on time these days. 

“You gotta be kidding me,” You mumbled as you adjusted your belt. It was too tight around your waist. But it was notched where it always was, and then you realized it wasn’t the belt that was too tight. 

“No,” You shook your head as you walked to the mirror that hung from behind the door. You lifted your shirt and turned to the side.

“No, no.” You mumbled as you set your hands around your stomach. It was definitely sticking out more than it should’ve.

You let the shirt drop, which made you look almost normal, and then you picked the shirt up again as you thought about when you got your last period--but of course, it was never regular after the end of the world to begin with. 

“(Y/N), I’m ready to go…” Judith swung the door open but paused when she saw you. “Are you pregnant?” She yelled. 

You immediately pulled her into your room and shut the door behind her. “Do you always have to be so loud,” You said, which made her giggle. 

“Let me see.” She reached for your shirt, which you let her, and she pulled it up. “I remember how big mom’s tummy got.”

“I’m not pregnant,” You said, but you weren't so sure when you looked in the mirror. The symptoms you had for your first were surprisingly few; if it was the same, it wasn’t a wonder how you didn’t realize sooner. 

“I bet Daryl will be happy.”

“Go get your sword before I toss you out the window, missy.” 

***

“Judith!” You screamed, flicking blood off your machete. Your heart was beating faster than you ever could’ve imagined as you looked around the woods for your niece. You felt tears burn in your panic, and you looked at Rosita, who looked as desperate and scared as you. 

You followed Rosita through the woods, screaming out for Judith. You ran towards the sound when you finally heard her yelling that she was close. 

“I heard them calling, they needed our help.” Judith said. 

You looked behind her and immediately drew an arrow. Five strangers were following behind her, all out of breath and in bad shape. Dog was barking like crazy in warning, and you whistled to recall him. He sat next to you. 

Rosita and Aaron discussed with Judith as to why you couldn’t bring them back, and you watched her threaten that she wouldn’t come back. 

“We bring them.” You said. “I will talk to Michonne. I want us in group formation. There are walkers behind every damn tree.” You said. 

Eugene and Laura took the lead, while Rosita and Aaron took the back. You and Judith walked side by side with the strangers. You noticed the two quiet ones were talking in sign language, and you could pick up a few things they were discussing. 

“Hey,” You took a couple quick steps and looked at the one who heard you. You set your machete away and did your best to sign as you spoke. “I’m (Y/N). It’s been a while since I’ve signed. I wanted to reassure you that you’ll be safe. We’ll help your friend. I can’t promise anything after that.”

“I’m Kelly,” The younger one said as she signed. “This is my sister Connie.” You looked at Connie while she signed. “She said-.”

“I got the gist,” You said, then you did your best to sign again and had to spell out a few words you didn’t remember. I went to school for speech pathology before switching to medicine. It’s been a long time, though.

It’s nice to meet someone I can talk to you, Kelly always has to translate for me, Connie signed to you. You were able to understand most of it and you nodded at her, which made her smile. 

***

Daryl was the first one you saw when you walked through the gates, and you smiled, jogging up to him. Your bow clanged against his crossbow as you hugged, and he kissed you briefly before looking past you. “What’s all this?”

“Don’t ask,” You muttered. “One word. Judith.”

“Ain’ a surprise.”

You turned back to the strangers as they marveled at the community, and you saw in their faces how relieved they were. They had to have been out there for a long time. You couldn’t imagine it. After all this time, you didn’t know what you would do without the communities. 

There was a slight argument amongst the residents before Michonne showed up, and after looking them over, she had them put away into holding for the night so the council could vote in the morning. 

Daryl had more work to do, so he bid goodbye, and you walked home with Judith. 

“So when are you gonna tell him?”

“Judith.”

“What? I’m just asking. Would that mean I’m an aunt if you have a baby?”

You smiled, looked down at your niece, and then wrapped an arm around her. “No, sweetheart. It would make you cousins. You’ll be an aunt when RJ has a baby in many, many years from now.”

“But I could help you take care of it.”

“Judith.” 

“Maybe you can ask mom to help you since you don’t have any kids,” Judith asked as she looked up at you. 

You frowned slightly and tipped her hat forward to cover her eyes. “I did have a kid. I had a son. But he died in my belly.”

“Oh, I’m sorry,” Judith said. “Was it before?”

You nodded as you stopped by the stairs to your house. “It was.”

Judith gave you a big hug. “For what it’s worth, I think you’ll be a great mom. You’re my best friend.” 

***

You were standing in your room a few hours later naked, having just showered. Your long hair was dripping as you turned to look at yourself in the mirror. Your stomach wasn’t extended the way it would’ve been if you’d put on a bit of weight--which you’d gotten back to your regular weight after being shot--but it was just your lower belly. And it took you back to years ago with Liam, and you were this size at around five months. If you were pregnant, you’d be showing earlier. 

You pressed your hand against the swell and sighed loudly. Pregnant. After all this time, you couldn’t be, could you? Not after all these years. 

The sound of meowing caught your attention, and you quickly got dressed before walking over to the window. Tora was at the front steps, and you didn’t like the sound of her howling. Your fingers trembled as you looked at her for another second. She was pushing thirteen, which was on her breed's older side of the lifespan. 

You quickly rushed down the stairs and outside. 

“Tora, sweetie,” You said as you scooped her up in her arms. She’d been losing weight a lot in the past month. You knew her time was coming. 

She meowed quietly as she got comfortable in your arms. Living on your farm, you’d grown up around house cats and barn cats, and they all acted the same way when it was time. When they needed to say goodbye. So when you saw Tora looking up at you with those sweet, innocent eyes, you knew it was. 

Tears burned your eyes as you thought about your old treehouse and living there with her alone. How she kept you alive because you were too stubborn to let her die. And even before that, when Liam gave you to her on Christmas morning, she immediately crawled into your lap and started purring. Thirteen years was long for a cat in this world, and she spent most of it malnourished, even though you did your best. 

“(Y/N)? What’s going on?” 

You looked up at Judith with tears on your cheeks. “Can you run and get Siddiq for me, sweetie?”

Ten minutes later, Siddiq held Tora in his arms as you watched him press around her belly. When she showed discomfort and tried to scratch him, he gave her back to you. 

“I’m sorry. It’s probably the kidneys. I can use the machine on her tomorrow to take a look.”

You nodded, but you knew it wouldn’t come to that. She wasn’t going to make it through the night. 

“Do you know where Daryl is?”

“He was with Aaron. I think they were workin’ late on the farming stand.”

Siddiq said goodnight and squeezed your arm before he left, and then Judith wrapped her hand around your bicep. “Can I come with you?”

“I’m gonna bring her back here, Jude. I promise. Can you get some pillows and blankets on the couch? You know how she likes it.”

Judith nodded and ran back into the house. You sniffled a few times and started walking towards the center of the community. 

You were already crying when you saw Daryl with Aaron, working with flashlights to get the stand finished. You tried to call out his name but had to take a deep breath. Tora stirred in your arms and you shushed her, kissing the top of her head. 

“Daryl?” He turned around the moment he heard the tone of your voice, and you saw his face drop when he saw you. “Tora…she…” You broke out into tears. 

He tossed his tools aside, told Aaron he’d see him tomorrow, and then came to you. “Come on, darlin’, let’s get her home.” 

You nodded as he wrapped his arms around your shoulders and led you home.

Judith set up the couch like you asked her, and you gently set Tora on the blankets before sitting on the floor. You gently ran your hand along her body and fluffy tail, and she looked at you with those big eyes. 

Daryl sat down next to you while Judith sat on the couch. You pressed your forehead on the cushion near her paws and tried not to start scream-crying in front of Judith. You wanted to do that and throw things around and punch holes through walls. But you didn’t do any of that. 

“Why don’ ya go get ya mom, Judith? She’ll wanna be here.” 

Michonne joined you with a sorrowful look on her face. She loved Tora, although she didn’t show it. But you remembered perfectly her sneaking little bits of food to her when she thought no one was looking. 

After a little while, you let Tora sleep and leaned against the loveseat. Daryl sat beside you, and Michonne took the chair with Judith on her lap. You told them all silly stories about Tora before they knew her when she was just a kitten, and you told Judith how much her brother loved the cat and how you’d always find him stealing her every chance she got--which was something they had in common. Over the past six years, Tora often slept at the foot of Judith’s bed. 

It drew further into the night, and everyone was half asleep when Tora stirred on the couch. The bell from her collar rang as she jumped down and limped her way toward you. She curled herself up on your lap, and you gently pet her. Daryl took your other hand, and Judith and Michonne came to sit on the floor with you. 

“You’re okay,” You said through your tears. “You can sleep now. Say hi to Carl for me, okay, when you get there?”

Around two in the morning, Tora took her last breath in your arms. You sobbed, holding her body to your chest. Daryl held you while Michonne held a hysterical Judith. 

Your heart ached when Daryl tried to take her body from you, and you finally gave in. “Make sure she’s comfortable,” You sobbed. “Wrap her in her favorite blanket. Please be careful.”

“I got her, I got her,” He reassured you.

Judith came over to you and sat on your lap to hug you, and you held her tight as you both cried. 

“I wanna bury her next to Carl,” You said through tears. “I think they’d both really like that.” 

Michonne wiped away her tears, and she stood up. “Of course, we can plant some flowers. Anything you want. I’m gonna take Judith up to bed. You can sleep in my room if you want, honey.”

Judith nodded through tears as she stood up. “I wanna help bury her.”

You slowly stood up and ran your hand on the back of her head. “We’ll do it tomorrow morning before the meeting. Don’t worry, sweetie, I’ll wake you up for it.”

Your niece gave you one more big hug before Michonne led her to the stairs, and you could hear her crying on the floor above you. You sat down on the chair and hung your head in your hands. 

Footsteps caught your attention, and you looked at Daryl, who you knew was crying. He must’ve taken a few extra minutes to avoid crying in front of Judith. 

“Wrapped her up gentle, I promise,” Daryl told you and helped you up so he could hug you. “In her favorite blanket. We’ll bury her tomorrow.”

“We have to give her a funeral.” You cried into his chest. “A good one. She was my life.”

He rubbed the back of your head and kissed your forehead. “We’ll give her the best damn funeral Alexandria has ever seen, okay? Come on, let’s get to bed. Ya gotta try and sleep, darlin’.”

You didn’t want to; of course, you didn’t. But you knew you needed to, and sleep would make you forget. So you let him bring you upstairs, help you into pajamas, and then hold you while you cried yourself to sleep. 

***

The following day, Tora’s absence had you hysterically crying. It woke Daryl up, and he held you, rubbing your back and trying to help you calm down. Then your door opened, and Judith ran in. 

“I thought you left without me, and I missed it,” She started sobbing and jumped on the bed, pushing her way so she was lying between you guys.

“No, sweetie,” You cried and kissed her forehead. She cuddled up against you to cry. 

***

Aaron must’ve spread the word about Tora’s passing because your family was there as you carried her wrapped-up body to the small cemetery. Michonne must’ve woken up early to dig the grave because it was already ready and waiting next to Carl’s. 

You knelt on the ground and gently laid her body to rest. You wiped away your tears and stood up. Daryl wrapped an arm around you and nodded at Aaron, who grabbed the shovel. 

“I would like to say a few words,” Judith said as she grabbed your hand. “If everyone would please pay attention…” When everyone was, she spoke again. “I knew Tora my whole life. I heard stories about her sleeping in my crib with me. And she was the best cat I ever had. And I love her so much.”

You smiled through your tears at your niece, squeezing her hand. 

“One time when we were on the road,” Rosita said, “Before we found this place, she came up to me and sat next to me. It was weird for me because I’m a dog person. But she just sat right there. It was like she knew I needed to not be alone.” 

“I enjoyed watching her chase birds,” Eugene bowed his head. 

Your eyes filled with tears as Michonne stepped up. “She used to try and steal RJ’s food,” She laughed. “I always let her have some.”

“Thank you guys,” You said. “Thank you for helping keep her safe. She was special. And even though this is heartbreaking, I’m happy I was able to keep her safe. And she passed peacefully in my arms. Safe, and warm, and so, very loved.” 

You looked up at Daryl, the only one who hadn’t said anything. 

“I, uh.. I first met the cat when I first met (Y/N), when we almost killed each other. I remember thinkin’ she must be crazy for havin’ a cat. But Tora was good. And ‘m gonna miss her every day.” 

#daryl x y/n #daryl dixion x reader #the walking dead daryl #daryl fanfiction #daryl dixon x reader #daryl x reader #daryl dixon #daryl twd #twd #daryl x you

[anticomedygarden]

Percabeth hurt/comfort post Tartarus ptsd?

Basic I know but you can't go wrong torturing some comfort characters 😂

one of my favorite pjo tropes! so so true, thanks for the prompt. (you're my first ever prompter! bit of a landmark for me :) )

-

Staring deeply into his blue comforter like it held the secrets of the world, Annabeth didn't need to be a child of Athena to know that her boyfriend wasn't really there with her. It wasn't the first time one of them had found the other like this, and it probably wouldn't be the last.

He wasn't making noise or moving, actually not doing anything at all, which led her to believe that he wasn't having a panic attack or a flashback. Dissociation then.

After a lot of trial and error following the titan war, they'd figured out touch - especially involving water - helped ground him the best, so she didn't bother with trying to talk to him, not knowing how far gone he was yet. Instead she got some ice out of the water bottle on his nightstand, happening to glance at the few pictures she'd been able to bring for him to Camp Jupiter. Sally, Grover, Tyson, Thalia, the Stolls, Clarisse, and a few other campers smiled back at her.

If she'd known they were going to fall into Tartarus, she'd have packed a few more.

Turning away from the photos with a sigh, she sat down cross-legged on his bed and winced when the mattress bouncing got no reaction from him, so she gently picked up his arm in the hand not holding the ice and starting rubbing it up and down his tan forearm.

"Percy?" she murmured. "I'm gonna count backward from 100, okay?"

Predictably, he didn't answer, but she started her countdown anyway, studying his form for any changes. His jet black hair was falling into his down cast eyes, low enough that she couldn't see his seagreen irises. His pants were creased where his elbows rested on them, and she realized he was wearing the same thing as he was when his watch ended an hour ago. It hurt to know that he could've been like this for so long and she had no idea, but there wasn't anything she could do, not without leaving the ship vulnerable.

Then - movement. His hand twitched; she didn't dare stop, though, not wanting to risk backslide, just kept on counting and rubbing the ice up and down his arm.

A few minutes later, he pulled in a sharp breath and sagged a bit so that the only thing Annabeth could see was the top of his head. She'd lost count of how many times she'd made it to a hundred and back at this point.

"Percy? Are you with me?" He waited a bit and nodded minutely. "Can you try and breathe with me?"

She drew in an exaggerated breath slowly and let it out even slower. He didn't join her, so she tried again. This time, he managed a shaky, slow breath that almost aligned with hers.

After a few minutes passed and he seemed to be more present, she put the ice down on the nightstand, and he sagged even more, head landing on her shoulder like his strings had been cut.

She ran her fingers through his thick curls, illiciting a sigh from him. "Hey, baby."

His breath hitched, and she was afraid for a moment he'd start panicking, but she soon felt her shoulder grow wet.

"We're together," she whispered, hoping his words from so many (weeks? days?) ago would bring him some comfort.

They were still the most important words in the world to her.

At some point, his hands must have unclenched because she felt his nails softly scrape her thigh. "How long was I gone?"

"I don't know," she said honestly. "At least 15 minutes, an hour at most."

"Damn."

Sadly, he pushed himself off of her shoulder, leaving it cold and salty. "What's the last thing you remember?"

He looked off into the distance, thinking. "I remember sitting on the bed to get to ready to shower, and nothing else."

Her heart clenched as that meant he must have been gone closer to an bour. Do you have any idea what triggered you?"

"Uh...I think maybe when I looked across the hall and saw your empty bed..." He trailed off, and she nodded.

"I'll keep the door closed from now on," she promised. It wouldn't be any kind of major change since she never slept in that room anyway. The only reason it had been open was because of habit from Coach Hedge.

Now that Percy was present and they were both calmer, they started getting ready to shower, not wanting to be without the other. (Only shower. Neither of them were ready for more at the moment.) It wasn't long before they were climbing into bed together, both considerably more refreshed but exhausted from a long day on the Argo II.

It had to get better at some point. It just had to.

#percabeth #pjo #percy jackson #annabeth chase #percy jackon and the olympians #my writing #my fic #fanfic #angst #my fanfic #fluff #percabeth fanfic #percabeth fic #prompt #ficlet #ask #post house of hades #post tartarus

[svtminghaolove]

You’re having trouble sleeping - Hip hop unit (SVT)

Hello agaaaaain~ I finished this one pretty fast actually, was not expecting that but here it is (;

Triggers: Swears

S.Coups: School was freaking you the fuck out. It hadn't gone that well lately and basically your whole tuition was hanging on a test you had done a week ago, one that you was about 97% certain that you had failed. This had caused you to lay awake at night, all kinds of scenarios going through your head: What if you can't pay your rent? Would you have to drop out? Get another job? Return back home? It gave you no peace of mind and as soon as you closed your eyes you could feel the tears of stress burn behind your eyelids.

The fact that you hadn't been seeing Seungcheol for a while didn't really help either. He had been away for a few days for filming a music video and had even been hard to reach by phone. But today was the day he was coming back and he had planned to go straight to your place, but it was pretty late on a school night so he sent away a text to check first.

'Are you awake? Can I come over?'

'Yes. Please do.'

He frowned at your short answer, it wasn't rude or anything but it just sounded… weird, not like you would usually write to him.

He drove over to your place and was quick going up to your apartment door. He barely knocked two times before you opened the door, eyes red and lips dry. Your lips quivered as you set your eyes on Seungcheol and his eyes went wide.

"y/n, what happened? Are you okay?", you didn't answer him and just stepped out in the corridor, and leaned into his chest, letting silent tears fall. He almost found the silent tears more disturbing than if you had cried your heart out.

"… y/n?", he said softly as he put his arms around you and backed you into the apartment. "Hey babe, are you okay?", he closed the door behind him and you shook your head.

"I can't sleep", your voice was raspy and heavy. A voice that Seungcheol was very familiar with since he himself sounded like that from time to time.

"Want to talk about it?", you shook your head again, not even aware of the fact that Seungcheol was slowly backing you into the bedroom.

"Just… school is freaking me the fuck out", you whispered and he just hummed as an answer, the soft vibration from his chest making you close your eyes. You were by this point so out of reality and focused on him that you didn't realize that you were laying down until he pulled away.

"Where are you going?", you sat up as he stepped back.

"I'm just going to get ready for bed, I'll be quick", he said softly and kissed you on the temple before going into the bathroom for a few minutes.

You sat up in bed, listening to the water running until he came back. He gave you a soft smile when he saw you sitting on the bed, not saying anything as he climbed into bed next to you. He opened his arms and you laid down with your head resting on his chest. His heartbeat made everything around you just disappear and when he started humming it was like this was all that existed. The vibrations coated your skin and forced your muscles to relax.

"You know that I'll always be here right? If school is too much you can take a break.", he whispered but by that point you were already half way to dreamland.

Wonwoo: It had been two night without sleep, three days without sleep. You had a deadline for a writing project soon and where nowhere near done, which meant that you couldn't sleep but you needed to sleep but the work got you so stressed out so you couldn't. It was just… a mess, you were a mess all couped up in you study.

Since you didn't live with Wonwoo, he hadn't seen most of it and just thought that you were working, but when you didn't show up for a date the two of you had planned and only got a "sorry, work" as an explanation, he went to your place. He had the key so he just went inside, it was completely dark in the apartment, except from the small light coming from your study. He softly knocked on the door but when he got no response he opened.

"y/n?", you didn't answer but he saw you hunched over your desk, paper all over the floor and the laptop pushed to the side.

"y/n? Are you okay?", he went forward and put a hand on your shoulder, only to feel it shaking. "Are you crying? y/n, is everything alright?", he turned around your chair and you let out a sob as you leaned your forehead against his stomach.

"I can't write", you sobbed and he stoked your back, trying to size up the situation.

"Okay, let's take a break then.", you pulled back from him and brushed away the hair from your forehead. That was when he noticed the rings under your eyes were so dark they almost looked like bruises.

"I can't, I don't have the time.", he knelt down and pulled the chair closer when you tried to push away.

"When is the last time you slept?", you sighed.

"Don't you get it? I can't sleep! I don't have the time and if I try to sleep I just stress out of how little time I have and if I don't sleep I just sit here staring onto a empty screen waiting to be filled with ideas that I don't have!", the tears started to flow and you started to hiccup. He could barely keep up with your disarrayed thoughts and it hurt him to see you this way.

Wonwoo placed his arms around you and you laid yours around his neck, pressing your face into his shoulder.

"Come on, let's go to bed."

"I can't sleep", you hiccuped and he hummed as he carried you to the bedroom. On the way he picked up a random book laying on the shelf, and it unexpectedly turned out to be a children's book for one of your nieces or nephews.

"Alright, come here", he put you down on the bed, laying down next to you. You crawled up on his side and he turned on the reading light and opened the book.

"You're reading me a children's book?", you asked, slightly amused.

"Hush, just close your eyes and listen", he placed his free arm around you and you rested your head on his chest.

He began reading the book (mind you one that's meant for a three year old) and you closed your eyes. You listen to the combination of his heartbeat and his hushed voice and after a while your tears stopped flowing and the hiccup disappeared. You relaxed and your body molded itself to his and before you knew it, you fell asleep to your boyfriend reading a children's book to you.

Mingyu: It was the day before they were going away for a tour. Or well, the night before. He was leaving tomorrow night, when you were still asleep. It was the first time he was going on tour since the two of you got together and you just felt a bit unsettled, which made you unable to fall asleep. At first you had tried to fall asleep next to Mingyu but after about two hours you enough and quietly climbed out of bed and into the living room. You just sat down on the couch, staring out the window. There was a million thoughts going through your head at the same time as it felt like you were thinking about nothing.

"What are you doing awake?", Mingyu slumped down next to you in the couch, letting his head fall into your lap.

"Can't sleep", you were really tired to be honest.

"Why?", you went quiet for a moment at the question, just letting your fingers comb through his hair. He took your hand and pressed his lips to your palm. "y/n?"

"I don't know exactly why, I just feel… uneasy whenever I think of you going away on tour", he raised a brow and smiled.

"Because you'll miss me?", you rolled your eyes and lightly slapped his forehead.

"Yeah, I'll miss you", you sighed. "… A lot. I'll miss you a lot", you looked out the window again.

"I'll miss you too", he kissed your palm again. "We'll talk everyday, you can call me in the middle of the night if you have to", you shook your head.

"You won't forget me, right?", you joked, but even Mingyu knew that it wasn't completely meant as a joke.

"Never.", he said and sat up. "You're not really afraid of that are you?"

"… no. Yes?", you let out a dry laugh. "No. I know you won't forget me it's just… a weird thought. A what if thing that clung to me.", he placed his arms around your shoulders and pulled you closer to him.

"I love you, with my whole heart and if you ever leave me I would cry for ten years", you laughed and hugged him back. "I'll never forget you, I'll call you so much that you'll block my number."

"Okay", you closed your eyes, the sleepiness finally falling over you. "I love you too", you yawned and he pulled back.

"So, ready for sleep now?", you nodded and then the two of you went back to bed, limbs and all interwined.

Vernon: It was during a time that you had so much work and too few hours on the day, so you sleep was the first thing to go. At first it was only cutting back a few hours but when you realized that sleeping a few hours made you even more tired than not sleeping at all, well you stopped sleeping. And when you finally had the time to start sleeping again, your body just wouldn't let you. Every time you were about to fall asleep it was like a warning bell went off in you and you sat straight up in the bed.

Vernon, of course noticing your sudden movements happening multiple times, asked you what was going on but you had just brushed it off. But it was even more concerning when he realized that you stopped coming to bed at all.

One night he woke up in the middle of the night to what sounded like a pot hitting the floor. He figured out pretty quickly that it was you when you weren't in bed next to him, but he had no idea what you were doing in the kitchen at four in the morning.

"y/n?", he asked, voice raspy from sleep and hair all over the place as he walked into the kitchen to find you over the stove.

"Oh, sorry. Did I wake you?", you sounded completely exhausted and the smile on your face didn't hide the dark rings under your eyes.

"What you doing?", you turned back to the stove.

"Heating up some milk, you want some? It's my mom's secret recipe", you turned back to him with a smile. "It's cinnamon, the secret", he scoffed add walked over to you.

"Want to tell me?", your smiled dropped at his words.

"You noticed?", he wrapped his arms around your waist and rested his chin on your shoulder.

"Hard not to.", he softly squeezed you in his arms. "So, want to tell me?"

"… My body just jolts awake every time I'm about to sleep. It's like when you're deep asleep and the alarm rings in the morning, every time I try to sleep", you sighed and leaned back into him. You felt how everything just wanted to shut down and fall asleep but you just couldn't.

"Okay, let's watch a movie", you rolled your eyes but nodded.

You poured up two cups of the heated milk and went over to the couch where Vernon had piled up with pillows and blankets, holding out his arms to you. You sat down in his arms and he bundled up the two of you before taking his cup. You were half laying down in his arms, getting yourself comfy as he turned on the movie.

"The Grinch? Really?", you laughed and took a sip from your cup.

"You always manage to fall asleep to it on Christmas", you laughed and softly jabbed him with your elbow before getting cozy in his arms.

But Vernon was right, you always did fall asleep during The Grinch. And when he noticed your head starting to lull backwards he took the cup from your hands and placed it next to his on the small table next to the couch.

"Works like a charm", he smiled and carefully picked you up to carry you to bed.

-----

Masterlist

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Taglist: @foxdaisy @pearlygraysky @cixrosie @thmrdrs

#svt #seventeen #svt imagine #seventeen imagine #svt imagines #seventeen imagines #svt preferences #seventeen preferences #svt fic #seventeen fic #svt fanfic #seventeen fanfic #svt x reader #seventeen x reader #svt x female reader #seventeen x female reader #svt hip hop unit #seventeen hip hop unit

[onceuponastory]

3am - bucky barnes x reader

And now it's 3AM and you're calling me up again And you wanna know if I meant every word that I said - 3am by you me at six

Plot: One night at 3am, Bucky Barnes gets a call about his ex, Y/N. Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Female!Reader Warnings: Being drunk, injuries/broken bones, a tiny mention of vomit, and a few mentions of Bucky’s past as the winter soldier (but nothing too graphic). As always, if I miss any triggers please let me know! Notes: Thank you to my bestie @staticscreenwriting / @astartothemoon for my dividers. Not beta’d, so any mistakes are my own.

One winter night in the middle of Brooklyn, Bucky Barnes is fast asleep. For once, things around him are quiet, and he’s finally able to get some rest after the years of pain and torment he’s been through. Yet soon, the phone rings, startling him.

“Hello?” He murmurs, still half asleep.

“Hello, is that Mr Bucky Barnes?” Bucky’s brows furrow, not expecting to hear his full name at three in the morning.

“Yes…it is. How can I help you?” He expects this call to be inconsequential, at most a prank being played by Sam or the kid. However, when the voice on the other end speaks, Bucky realises that this call will be everything but insignificant.

“This is the hospital. I’m calling on behalf of Miss Y/N Y/L/N.” At the mention of her name, Bucky sits up, immediately awake. Y/N is his ex-girlfriend. He hasn’t spoken to her in months since they broke up. Since he got scared that he wasn’t good enough for her because of his past and broke up with her a few months ago. And now, the hospital is phoning him up at 3am to ask about her. Concern floods Bucky’s entire body. Although they broke up, he still misses her dearly, and would move the ends of the earth to make sure she’s safe. Despite this, he hasn’t said anything to her about it, wanting her to let her get on with her life rather than being laid down with him and his issues. Honestly, he thought she had moved on a long time ago.

“What happened? Is she okay?” He asks, speaking a mile a minute.

“Yes sir, she’s okay. She got quite intoxicated, and had a nasty fall which resulted in her breaking her ankle.” Bucky breathes a sigh of relief. This is better than expected. She’s okay. She’s not dying. “I’m calling because she has you down as her emergency contact, and she has no way of getting home.” His words make Bucky stop. Even though he’s an Avenger, Bucky and Y/N never spoke about things like this, about what would happen if the other was hurt or in danger. It was just assumed that he’d take care of her and she’d take care of him, like any boyfriend or girlfriend would do. When they broke up, they were focused on bigger things, like coming to terms with almost a year of their lives suddenly meaning nothing, or moving stuff out of each other's apartments. Neither of them thought about the little things like this, how they could suddenly be confronted with each other once again. Yet, breakup or no breakup, Bucky would still do anything to make sure she’s safe. Picking her up from the hospital is nothing. “Mr Barnes? Hello?”

“I’ll be there as soon as I can.”

Bucky makes it to the hospital within ten minutes, furiously searching for any sign of Y/N. When a nurse points him to the right room, he almost pulls the door off of its hinges with the speed he opens it. As the door opens, Y/N turns around, looking at the new entry to the room. As soon as sees Bucky, her eyes light up, and she grins. The same smile that Bucky has missed for so long. Immediately, he starts smiling too, and butterflies start to flutter in his stomach. Maybe, just maybe, her happiness at seeing him isn’t just because she’s drunk. Maybe she misses him, too.

“Bucky! What are you doing here?” She gasps.

“I’m still your emergency contact, doll. You okay?” 

“Ohhhhh! And yeah, I’m fine.” Y/N nods. Bucky already knows she has no idea what he’s saying. And judging by the moon boot she’s wearing, her ankle is definitely going to start hurting soon. Alcohol is a hell of a drug. Yet, seeing her so happy despite everything still makes him smile. It reminds him of before, when they were both happy together. Back when things were still good between them, when they could speak to each other without devolving into arguments. He misses those days more than anything in the world. In all honesty, if he had the chance to go back in time, Bucky wouldn’t go back to the 40s, before his life changed in the worst possible way. Before he became a weapon of mass destruction. He’d go back to when he lost Y/N, and try to make things right, rather than running at the first sign of trouble. 

He’s good at that. At running.

As the doctor explains the break and the healing process, Bucky listens attentively, ensuring he’s ready to support Y/N and her needs. He’s not been good at much throughout his long life, especially not talking about his feelings. But he can be good at this, at taking care of the woman he loves. He can at least give her that after their relationship broke down. And then, something brushes against his hand. And then it does again. It’s only then that Bucky realises that something is Y/N’s hand. Feeling her fingers brushing against his still sends shivers throughout his entire body. Even though he’s been alive for decades now, Bucky swears that Y/N is the only one who makes him feel alive.

Soon, the doctor sends the pair away, and Bucky wheels Y/N towards the elevator. Immediately, he feels the atmosphere change. At least when they were with the doctor they had a middleman, someone to do all the talking to prevent them from speaking to each other. Now, it’s just them both, brought together again after being apart for so long. “This is fun.” Y/N mumbles with a giggle. 

“Just trying my best to make the ride as smooth as possible for you.” Bucky replies, chuckling to himself. Yet soon, the smile fades. Sure, they’re getting along now, but that’s largely because Y/N’s drunk and doesn’t remember that they’re broken up. But what happens when things go back to normal and she does remember? When this little pocket of happiness is gone? Honestly, Bucky can’t bear to think about it. But then, Y/N starts laughing again, and he can’t help but smile once more.

Maybe he can stay in this happy time a little longer.

Soon, the pair reaches Bucky’s car, and he lifts her into the passenger side, buckling her in before crossing over to his side and buckling himself in. As he drives, the pair sit in silence. For a while, Bucky thinks Y/N has fallen asleep, and is about to check on her, until:

“You know Bucky….” she trails off, and he raises a brow. “I miss you. I don’t know why we stopped talking.” The words are murmured, but Bucky hears them loud and clear. And they almost make his heart stop. Of course, he knew she had forgotten why they’d stopped talking, but he wasn’t expecting to hear the first few words. And it hits him like a bucket of cold water. She misses him. Maybe he has a chance to fix this. 

“I miss you too. More than you’ll ever know. I regret what happened every day.” He tells her. But then, Y/N goes back to her drunk mumbling as if nothing happened, as if both of them didn’t just admit that the pain and heartbreak of the last few months could’ve been avoided. Bucky sighs. He’s probably right. She’s just drunk, and her words mean nothing.

When they reach Y/N’s apartment, Bucky helps her up the stairs and into her apartment. She still keeps a spare key under a plant pot, just like she did when they were dating. Bucky still remembers warning her about it, how anyone could find the key and break in. To his surprise, though, she simply laughed.

“Don’t worry. I’ve got a super soldier to protect me…and he’s really cute, too.” She laughed, pulling him close for a kiss. That was the day she’d been making cookies, and she tasted like cinnamon and chocolate. Remembering the memory, Bucky smiles. At least he still has those to keep him happy.

Once inside, Bucky helps her towards her bedroom and into bed. “Thank you Bucky.” She murmurs. And almost as soon as her head hits the pillow, she falls asleep, snoring softly. Bucky sighs.

“I know you’re just drunk. You’ll wake up tomorrow, and this whole thing will be just a dream, and you’ll hate me again. But I’ll deserve it.” He sighs. After checking on her again, he leaves the room, ready to spend the night on her couch. Of course, it’s not the most ideal situation as her ex, but this way he can make sure she’s safe, and that she doesn’t hurt herself any more. 

As he gets himself comfy, Bucky glances around the room. All the pictures Y/N has with him are taken down. The sight makes his heart sink. He knows that keeping pictures of you and your ex-boyfriend around after you’ve broken up isn’t something people do, but seeing them all gone is like the final nail in the coffin. The ultimate confirmation that all hope of them having a happy reunion after this is gone. And Bucky knows he only has himself to blame.

So, with tears stinging his eyes, Bucky settles down to try and get some sleep.

The next morning, Y/N limps into her kitchen, rubbing her eyes. When she sees Bucky leaning against her counter drinking a coffee, her eyes widen.

“What happened? Why are you here?” Bucky sighs. He’s been awake for most of the night, trying to figure out the best way to explain the events of the last couple of hours and coming up empty. 

“I’m still your emergency contact, so I got a call from the hospital at three this morning saying you had broken your ankle and needed a ride home. So, I came and got you.” He explains. “The doctor wants to see you again tomorrow, so I can drop you off if you want.”

“Oh…thanks for doing that.” 

“Y/N, you were drunk. I wasn’t going to leave you alone in the hospital. I brought you home and put you to bed. I know we’re broken up, but I uh, I crashed on your couch to make sure you didn’t fall over or throw up during the night. Hope that’s okay.”

“Yeah, that’s fine. Thanks…again.” She nods. And just like Bucky predicted, things between them are back to being awkward. There’s no way she remembers her admission to him last night. Although he knew she wouldn’t, he can’t help but feel disappointed. Part of him was expecting them to make up right here, like they do in the romcoms.

“I’ll just finish my cup of coffee, and then I’ll go. Don’t want to make you uncomfortable or anything.”

“No! No, you don’t need to go.” She gasps, the quickness of her reply making Bucky raise a brow in confusion. Is she really that upset at the thought of him leaving? Does she really want him back, after all? “Not yet, anyway. You can stay a little longer.” Bucky nods, helping her sit down at her table and passing over some coffee.

“Do you want some breakfast? I could make you some pancakes, or we could order something in.” He offers.

“Some pancakes would be nice, thanks.” Bucky smiles.

“Coming right up.”

“You know….” Y/N sighs, stopping only to finish her last bite of pancakes. “That was really nice. It was just like how things used to be. You made me these every Saturday morning, remember?” The faintest hint of a smile twitches at the corners of her mouth. Bucky can pick up on the melancholiness in her voice, and how she misses their past. After all, he’s feeling the same way. 

“Yeah, I do. Those were great.” He sighs. All he wants is to tell her right then how much he misses her, how he’d give all he has to go back to those days, back to when they were both happy. He just doesn’t know how to tell her. The words just won’t link up to his mouth.

“How was I last night, by the way? Did I say anything, or was I out of it?” 

“No, not at all.” Bucky insists. She doesn’t have to know the truth about what she told him. Yet, his words make her furrow her brow.

“Well, you’re saying that Bucky, but I can tell you’re hiding something. I always could.” Bucky gulps.

“Yeah, you could.” He laughs awkwardly, and Y/N nods.

“So there’s that, and there’s also the fact that I wasn’t drunk enough to forget everything I said to you last night. At first, I thought it was a dream, but now you’re here....” Shit. “So, I’ll ask you again. Did I say anything to you last night? Like…about missing our relationship?” Bucky stammers, his eyes widening. 

“Yes. You did.”

“And you weren’t going to tell me?” She demands. “What, you were just going to let me carry on like I didn’t tell you the truth about how I’ve really been feeling?!”

“I didn’t think you meant it or that you’d remember! I thought it was just the alcohol! And besides, I wanted to say something, but the last thing I wanted was for you to wake up still hating me, and then find out you said something you didn’t mean.” Bucky explains. Y/N sighs.

“I never hated you, Bucky. Maybe at the beginning, but as time went on, I just realised how much I miss you. And I still do.” Bucky gasps, and he scoots his chair forward.

“I miss you too, Y/N. More than anything. I hate how things ended, and how I ruined everything. I’ve regretted it ever since. I was just so worried about hurting you, because of my past, but I ended up hurting you even more. I’m sorry for hurting you.” He sighs. To his surprise, Y/N starts chuckling.

“You know, we really should’ve told each other this before now.” She says, and Bucky nods, unable to stop himself from laughing too. It feels weird, being comfortable and laughing with each other after being apart for so long. Maybe though, the fact they’re able to do this shows that things might be okay between them both after all.

 “Yeah, you’re right. You know…if you’d like to start over, I’m okay with that.” When she doesn’t reply at first, Bucky gasps. “But if you don’t want to, that’s totally okay. We can take things as slow as you want.” Y/N smiles.

“Sure. Maybe after my appointment tomorrow, we can go get a drink or something?” 

“Yeah…I’d love that.” Bucky smiles.

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#Bucky Barnes #bucky barnes x reader #bucky x Female Reader #bucky x you #bucky barnes oneshot #bucky barnes fanfiction #bucky barnes fic #bucky x reader #bucky x y/n #marvel oneshot #marvel cinematic universe #marvel fanfic #marvel fanfiction

[minthara]

really long personal answer to an anon i got. trigger warnings in the tags.

First of all i wanna apologise to everyone who follows me for the last few days lmao, but i feel like if i dont post about it im literally gonna kill myself. I need somewhere to write down my thoughts because i feel bad always going to the same 2 friends i still have and complain about the same situation again and again about a dude they dont even know that well.

Thank you so much for ur message really, and sorry if im gonna take it as another excuse to write down all my thoughts, but i think it will really help me.

So the pathetic thing. I didnt ever post about this and in real life i think only like. 3 people knew. But after we broke up i begged him for months to take me back. It really was pathetic. And when he called me pathetic i think he was just very very hurt, because that was the second time i broke up with him (just a few weeks ago). It was in the sense of me begging him for so long just to break up again a few months later. I feel fucking stupid even writing this. I spent about 10k euros trying to get away from him, it fucked up my life so massively that i lost a job i really loved over it.

And now my new job is about 5 minutes away from our old apartment and i think thats a huge reason why i cant get over it. Every day i walk past restaurants, the supermarkets, anything we went to together. I had to buy snacks for work today and just burst into tears in the fucking supermarket because we used to go there together. The people at work are always so appreciative bc i know the area so well but they dont know how much it fucking hurts me and its so stupid like. Should i just avoid that part of town forever??? No fucking get over it bitch like wtf its a fucking supermarket.

And it also hurts because i know i wasnt always perfect and there were many times i was super mean to him. But at a point i couldnt deal with his ADHD anymore and that sounds so shitty but im a super organised person to the point where sometimes i wonder if thers anything ocd related but i dont think so. In my head i swap between i have ocd, i have adhd, i have borderline, i have autism  - i have no idea whats wrong with me, but the way i feel cant be normal. I know this because the way i behave isnt normal, i know i can come across as really strange, i cant judge social situations well and often dont know how to behave. But i constantly criticised him for symptoms of his mental illnesss.

But i never physically hurt him, and that was the last straw for me, why i left. I dont know how u can do that to a person you love.

And im just mourning the life i thought i was going to have so, so, so much. I know on tumblr ppl somehow think youre brainwashed when you want a traditional marriage and kids and stuff, but i really thought that was going to happen in the next 2 / 3 years, thats how i planned my life since i was fucking 21 and i met him. And now im almost 27, and i cant even go on dates because i cannot bear talking to new people because all i want is a clone of him but better.

I know i will look back at this and think “u cried about THAT guy???” in a few years, because thats how its always been in my life lol (except for one relationship, but were still really really best friends). I always think afterwards i will never love someone that much again. But it hits so much harder because it was such a serious relationship lol i really wanted to marry him. Sobs lol.

#asks #anonymous #abuse cw #suicide cw #i feel so much better after writing this down lol #blondshell salad on repeat if u know u know

[loveshotzz]

I see that your requests are open. I am a suckered for angst and Eddie Munson. And I have this idea for Eddie dies in the upside down from the bats and his girl can't ger over it. She is seriously depressed, stopped eating and sleeping, her friends and family are worried about her. She starts taking drugs to ease her pain. She is slowly killing herself from heartache. But Eddie didn't really die and has been trying to get back to her. He finally does but he is too late. She has died. Now he has to live his life without her. If you could this would be amazing. I thank you in advance.

I know you put this request in forever ago, I’m sorry it took me so long! I felt inspired by the song/music video for 11 Minutes following the five stages of grief. I kinda gave it a more ambiguous ending in case someone wants to believe it’s not too late. STILL NOT A HAPPY ENDING. I hope you don’t mind! It’s hard to hurt Eddie!

Thank you @myobmaya and @sweetsweetjellybean for reading this dark blurb over and over again, you’re the real MVP’s.

Warnings: Pure angst. Very dark themes under the cut read at your own risk. Mentions of Eddie’s death, severe depression, heavy drug and drinking use, talks of suicide, attempted suicide. Everything will be under the cut as to not trigger anyone. No smut but my blog is strictly 18 plus.

There’s still days where you wake up forgetting it ever happened. A sleepy hand reaching over searching for his warmth on the other side of a the bed, but when the coolness of the sheets hits your finger tips the harsh reality that he’ll never be there again rips through your chest hollowing out the heart that’s some how still there. A heart that you swore only beat because of him, his laughter making the blood course through your veins. If you close your eyes sometimes you can still remember it, the deep baritone of it. The way his chocolate eyes lit up, lips spreading over the expanse of his teeth. You hate that he’s getting harder to remember, that your have to really focus to see and hear the details of your favorite things about him. Clinging desperately to whatever you had left of him. Anything to remind you that the love of your life was real.

Denial:

You still remember when Dustin told you, with tears falling like waterfalls from his eyes the words leaving his mouth were jumbled with so much emotion you couldn’t understand anything he was saying. It was when he stuck his bloody hand in front of your face, Eddie’s guitar pick necklace dangling from his clench fist. It took you a minute to comprehend what was happening, staring from the sobbing boy to the necklace. Eyes flashing to the sullen faces of Steve, Robin, and Nancy it all starts to click but you still can’t stop yourself from asking.

Where’s Eddie?

The next few weeks are spent sitting on the metal picnic table in the middle of the trailer park. Eyes fixated on the rubble of what used to be the Munson’s trailer. The place that had become your home away from home. Another thing that was ripped away from you, the place that was was filled with almost all of your favorite memories. The place where all of your first’s happened, it was where you and Eddie could just be. Late nights left alone while Uncle Wayne was at work, the two of you got to know each other in a way that was deeper then anything you had ever felt. You two just understood each other, he was the only person that made you feel like you didn’t have to hide any parts of yourself. Even the parts you didn’t like, because he loved those too.

The wind catches and the corner of his handmade corroded coffin tapestry peaks from underneath the piles of bricks and glass. The deep crack in the earth only becoming worse with each passing day.

This can’t be real, he has to come back.

Every day you stare at the jagged edges of the ground hoping you’ll see those ringed hands come crawling their way back out of there. Maybe they were wrong. How could they know for sure? They just left him down there.

Anger:

It was all of their faults. Every single one of them. He didn’t need to go down there, he didn’t need to help be a distraction. They could have figured it out just like they always had before he got dragged into all of this. You needed someone to hate, someone to direct all of you anger at. Someone to blame for losing your soul mate before you even got to start your lives together. 86’ was suppose to be the year that changed it all for the both of you, saving up every penny to finally leave this shitty town behind. The resentment manifests itself so much you can feel it radiating from the furtherest parts of your body, rage burying itself so deep inside of you that you couldn’t see your way out. You didn’t have a choice but to cut them off. All they were to you was just a constant reminder of the fact that he was dead and they were alive.

Bargaining:

All you can think about is all the stupid little fights you two got in. The desperation to go to the past and take it all back, to treasure the short time you didn’t know you had with him. To hold him instead of yell at him, to tell him you didn’t care if he lost himself in a DND campaign that made him 40 minutes late to a movie you both had already seen. Maybe if you’d pushed him harder to study more he would have graduated a year earlier and you both would have been long gone before any of this could have happened. You could have had that studio apartment in the city, you could have watched him follow his dreams that were so much bigger then what he was born into.

Depression:

It had been two months since Eddie died, and yet it still hurts like the night you found out. A sadness so dark consuming you, it was becoming too much to be alive. You needed to forget. You needed to feel numb. It started off with liquor, drinking yourself till you blacked out every night. Sometimes it would back fire, the alcohol only intensifying the grief so much it left you crumpled on the floor before you’d slip into the darkness just to wake up in the same pain you were in before anything even hit your blood stream. It wasn’t enough. You needed something stronger. It started with K, it was a drug Eddie sold but it was never something you’d ever tried before. Eddie would never let you. At first doing it somehow made you feel closer to him and if you snorted enough of it you felt exactly what you wanted to feel, nothing. Eventually your tolerance became too much so you needed something even stronger. Scouring your mom’s medicine cabinet for her anti depressants, you started mixing the two. The combination enough to make your brain feel empty, the pain slowly fading away. Mixing the three of them had become your magic concoction.

The empty expanse of nothing became your safe space and this is where you decided you belonged now.

Maybe if you died, he’d be waiting. Maybe he’s been waiting this whole time.

Acceptance:

When you finally decid to kill yourself, it feels like a giant weight has finally been lifted off of your shoulders. You didn’t need to pretend to be a person anymore. You didn’t need to try to numb the pain, there wouldn’t be anything to run from anymore. No more new memories with out him, no more planning a life that wasn’t made for the two of you.

He’d be waiting, he had to be. The lights flickering on and off in your room the night you decide only encouraged you more. It was a sign, he was begging you to meet him. He missed you too. With a handful of pills and a belly full of rum, you snorted the last line off your dresser before you laid on the rough carpet of you room. The glossiness of the Polaroid in your hand catches your attention with your vision starting to blur you bring the picture up to your eyes, the smile on Eddie’s face still gives you butterflies.

The kind of peace that washes over your body when you feel your heart rate starts to slow down isn’t something you’ve felt since he died. When the room starts fading you swear you can hear his voice, a slow smile spreading lazily over your face at the sound. He’s calling your name and it’s clear as day, it’s almost like Eddie’s right next to you. It’s only when you see his big brown eyes hover over yours think you think you’ve made it to heaven.

He screams your name one more time before your vision goes black.

#eddie munson #eddie munson fanfic #eddie munson angst #eddie munson x reader #stranger things fanfiction #eddie munson stranger things #eddie munson imagines #eddie munson imagine #stranger things 4 #eddie x reader

[mastermindmiko]

The Malfoy sister (Part 2)

Pairing: Harry Potter + fem!reader

Word count: 4771

Summary: You and Harry meet up again after the events of the previous night, and you begin the events of your sixth year after a turbulent summer.

Part 1 , Part 3 and my masterlist

Trigger warnings: mentions of violence, mentions of public humiliation, smidge of anxiety, kissing, threats, hickeys, slight choking, grinding, oral sex, hair pulling, cum eating, mentions of Azkaban and Umbridge, jealousy, slapping (not the sexy kind). 

Requests are open

The next day, you woke up with someone shaking your shoulders and screaming, “WHAT THE HELL DID YOU DO?!” That shout was enough to make you wake up. You rubbed your eyes as your vision focused on Draco with a furious look on his face. You yawned as you stretched your arms above your body. You looked at him angrily for disrupting your sleep, you were about to punch his nose when he added, “You kissed Potter!”

You furrowed your eyebrows in confusion and you questioned “How do you know that? I told Peeves I’d give him as much pranking equipment he wanted to shut him up.” Draco rolled his eyes and he finally dropped your shoulders. He sat on your bed as he looked at you like you were the dumbest person alive. It was five am, your exam still hasn’t started. You looked around the room and you noticed that none of your dorm mates were there and you noted the mug filled with energizing potion on your night stand.

“Of course that wouldn’t shut him you idiot! He can make equipment out of thin air, you think that would shut him up!” He screamed in your face, and you wondered what was up with all these boys screaming in your face. You started drinking from your cup as you processed what Draco was saying. “How did you find out about that?” You asked cautiously.

“He spray painted it on the doors of the great hall-” He put his hands in the air to motion a big sign and he added “Potter and Female Malfoy kissing in the astronomy tower!” You gaped at his words as a wide gasp left your mouth. You put your head in your hands. You could barely think of anything but this mess. Will your parents find out? Of course they will! What will they do when they find out? How will Theo react ? What will Draco say? How will Slytherin house treat you now? How is Harry reacting?

“Don’t worry, I’ll sort things out.” He said and he put a hand on your shoulder. You hugged him. This was a rare occurrence, you never showed any affection ever. You sometimes gave your mother hugs but you almost never did with anyone besides her, Draco and Theo. He hugged you back after a few moments and you mumbled a thank you. He replied, “Don’t mention it, just act as if nothing happened. Okay?”

You nodded as you slipped away from his embrace. He left the room and you were sure that he was going to fix this mess. You knew that if it had to lead to that, he would obliviate every student in Hogwarts. You trusted him and you felt a little relieved. You got ready, making sure that you brought your History of Magic notes to revise.

You entered the Great Hall and everything was the same. No one said anything besides the usual and you sat between Draco and Theo as you did almost everyday. You whispered good morning to both of them as if Draco wasn’t just shaking the life out of you a few minutes ago and you pecked Theo’s lips, just like every morning. Nothing was different, and you acted that way. Draco patted you on your shoulder to say good job. You started eating and then Theo whispered in your ear “If the entire school wasn’t terrified of Draco, they sure are now.”

You looked at him, confused. He smirked and then explained, “He came down here and he screamed at everyone that if they uttered a word about you and Potter, he’d twist their body inside out. Then he ordered Carbbe and Goyle to clean up the paint on the wall. Then he told every Slythein that if a single thing was uttered to your parents, he’d kill them.”

You were shocked and you turned to Draco. He had the biggest smirk on his face, he was so proud of what he had done; and honestly, why shouldn’t he be? You turned back to your breakfast and then Theo asked you “Is it true?” You didn’t need any clarification, so you just nodded. You didn’t know what Theo would do or say.

“Was he a better kisser than me?” He asked, skeptically. You snapped your head towards him and you said “That’s the first thing you ask me! You’ve got to be kidding me!” He chuckled and pulled you closer by your waist. He started planting kisses on your neck towards your lips. “Come on, love. I just have to know if I need to up my game or not.”

You melted against his touch as you put your arms on his chest. “You’re both great-” He pushed his lips against yours roughly, he wanted an answer. “He’s just shy, and you’re anything but that.” You kissed him back and you could tell that he was trying so hard for you to tell him he’s better. You pulled back and you whispered “Theo, I’m not going to say anything other than that.”

He pulled away and he looked at you sternly, you couldn’t help but have a fond smile on your lips. You knew he wasn’t actually angry. He looped his arm around your waist and then you heard loud clattering. You lifted your head up and saw Harry walked out of the Great Hall. He was really angry. After years of taunting him, you knew how to read his body very well; and after yesterday you knew how to read him well in other situations.

Theo looked at you with sympathy and you just shrugged your shoulders indifferently. Some people looked at you and you tried to look stoic, they didn’t get enough time to look at you with Draco glaring at them and almost taking his wand out of his pocket. Theo knew better, he knew that you were hurt. He was the only one who listened to you while you kept going on and on about how much you love Harry. You knew he wouldn’t judge so you never held back about your feelings.

You finished your breakfast and you tried to keep Harry out of your thoughts as much as possible. It didn’t work, but you had to focus on the exam you had. So, you asked Theo to quiz you on some of the facts that you still weren’t very good at, and also to keep you in check whenever your thoughts drifted. You truly didn’t know what you’d do without him. He’s the only reason why you weren’t mad at your parents about how they arranged a marriage for you without your consent. You were four when it happened, but they still could’ve asked you. Theo gave you a thumbs up and you were sure that if you didn’t think about Harry the entire exam, you’d have a guaranteed Outstanding.

You walked out the Great Hall earlier than everyone else, you wanted to make sure you entered class early before the exam to ask Professor Binns about some random stuff. Almost no one was out in the hallways, and you smirked at how dumb they all were. The hallways were going to get crowded, so they’re guaranteed to come to class late. Not to mention that it’s very early in the morning, so they’ll already be walking slowly.

You had just excited the Great Hall when you were pulled against a wall. You gasped as you saw Harry standing in front of you. His hands were next to your head, caging you to the wall. “Pathetic! You really are just pathetic. Kissing two guys in less than eight fucking hours!”

You looked at him like he grew two heads, and you just decided to annoy him, so you said, “Did you wait for me all this time outside the hall?” You added a pout and you feigned an innocent look. He hated it when you did that. You could see his cheeks redden so you tilted your head to the side slightly and you added, “doing nothing, you just waited; for little 'ol me.”

He was radiating anger and he leaned his head closer to yours as he whispered venomously, “I bet you had so much fun, didn’t you? Kissing him while you knew you had me watching. For the first time in five years you didn’t look at me once during breakfast, and you snogged me for an hour last night; but then-” He trailed off as his hands went to your neck and tapped on the places where Theo was kissing you. He left hickeys and you didn’t notice. He was very subtle, even Draco didn’t notice. “You let Nott leave those on your neck.”

He tightened his grip on your neck and you repeated from yesterday, “You’re just jealous that it was Theo and not you.” He could’ve denied it, but it was painfully obvious. He knew he wasn’t that good with feelings, but it was clear. He burst out of the Great Hall, now everyone knows that he’s jealous of Nott. He hated that nickname, he hated that Nott had one and he didn’t. He had some like scar head but he could just picture how Nott felt whenever your pretty lips uttered that nickname. Theo, Theo, Theo. The name kept going through his head again and again and again. His blood continued to boil as he whispered “Damn, right.”

He crashed his lips against yours, and it was feverish and angry. You could tell that he was seeing red and he wanted you to feel it. He moved his lips against yours quickly and roughly. It was as if he was trying to get Theo off you. You remembered how you called him a shy kisser but this was anything but shy. He had his hand on your neck, not as tight as you wanted so you said, “He asked me who was a better kisser.”

He let out a sound that almost sounded like a growl and you smirked. You didn’t have time to let him see it because he had his lips on yours and it was even rougher. In a few seconds of kissing, you could already feel your lips start to bruise. He pushed your body against the wall again with his other hand and he tightened his grip on your neck. That’s it, you thought. He silently asked what you replied, and you replied “I’m not telling you.”

Harry looked at his watch and there was still forty five minutes till your exam. He pulled you over his shoulder and he led you to an abandoned class room near professor Binns’ class. He ignored the way you kept hitting his back and asking loudly “where are we going?” “Where the hell are you taking me Potter?” “Put me down right now!” “I swear Potter, if you don’t put me down right now, I will hex you!” All of which he replied with a strong and stern “Shut up.”

He closed the door and placed you on the ground in front of him. Your hair was messy and your lips were bruised. He saw the bruises on your neck again and he pressed his lips to your neck. He started sucking on the exact spots that had the bruises. Your skin was sensitive in those areas from the already existing hickeys. You were a whimpering mess. The sounds were heaven to Harry. He licked the bruises and bit them, replacing them with darker ones. He added more to your jaw and your neck.

He pulled away to admire his creations. He hummed, satisfied at how your lips were red and hickeys were littered all across your neck and jaw, without mentioning your messy hair. He was very hard, and he was even harder when you whimpered “Harry-” as you pulled him closer by his collar to kiss him. The first time you ever said his first name to him and he was spiraling.

“Say it again.” He whispered. He put his hands on your waist and you asked “What?” he pulled you by your neck and he pressed your lips against his. “My name, say it again.” You furrowed your eyebrows in confusion so you said, questioningly, “Harry?”

He shook his head and grinded his hips against yours, making sure that your heat was directly over his cock. “Not like that.” He huffed, roughly. He wanted it to come out as a sigh, as a pleading moan, as a helpless whimper. He kept putting your entrance on him, so that any word that comes out of you can’t sound normal. “Harry-” You repeated, and it was the hottest thing he’s ever heard.

“Again.” He ordered, and he picked up the pace of his grinding. You held onto his shoulders as you kept saying his name. After hearing it several times, he seemingly became satisfied; so he silenced you with his lips. He looped his hand under your thigh and wrapped your leg on his hips. He pressed his cock onto you harder and you let out a moan, he added at the same time “I love the way you say my name.”

“What? Scarhead wasn’t sexy enough for you.” He didn’t even let you finish as he grinded onto you. You were sure that reply with ‘I love you’ wouldn’t have done you any good. You couldn’t get over the fact that you were dry humping the boy you’ve liked for the past three years in an abandoned classroom, and that you were almost going to cum from just that. You were very turned on and very wet, and you knew if he kept this up, you’d cum very soon. You put your hand on his chin and you ran it up in a straight line to the bridge of his nose, and till his forehead. He was very confused, you knew that. So, you flattened your palm and hooked the hair that had fallen on his forehead with your fingers. You quickly, and roughly pulled his hair to the back. “I love your hair.”

He groaned at the force and your words. He kissed you again and again and again. He wondered how he didn’t kiss you earlier. If he knew you’d feel like this, make him feel like this; he wouldn’t have waited a second regardless of everyone else. He loves your lips and your taste. He heard your breath hitch and your legs shake so he held one of your legs up for you. You were close, he acknowledged.

You pulled away from him and took off your underwear. It was lace, and green. You resumed back to your original position. The pleasure had increased because of the lost fabric that was between you two. You were moaning loudly and when you were just on the edge of release, he stopped his motions. You sucked in a breath, and you didn’t even give him a reaction as you started to trail your hand to your clit. He grasped your wrist tightly and he went down on his knees. Your eyes widened.

He put your leg on his shoulder and he started kissing and licking you. He licked the trail of wetness that had run down your thighs. You threaded your fingers through his hair again and you kept pulling on it. You released with a loud moan, and he didn’t waste one drop. He ate you out through your release, and you kept moaning. Once you were finished, he stood up and continued to grind on you. You were whimpering this time because of how sensitive you are. He had to hold you up tighter. You could faintly hear him whisper “You tasted like heaven.”

You replied, “Let me taste then.” You knew how you tasted, you just wanted to kiss him. He kissed you and explored your mouth with his tongue. He grinded against you and you kept whimpering. His breaths were heavier so you fiddled with his belt, since he was about to cum. “Wouldn’t want you going back to the common room with your pants soaked, now do we?” You said as you finally unbuttoned his pants and they fell to the floor.

You took off his boxers and you sucked in a breath at his size. You felt that he was big but without the materials constricting him, he was just…wow. You heard him chuckle at your expression, and you pulled his hair. He groaned and his head fell on your shoulder. You started to stroke him with your hand. “You like that huh?” You chuckled and you felt him twitch.

“Oh-” You said and you added, “You like me talking to you like the pathetic needy boy you are.” He groaned. Merlin! You were so infuriating. “You can’t even reply to me.” He was close again, and he was getting loud so he bit your shoulder. He cummed all over your hand, and you kept stroking him. His moans turned into whimpers. When he finished, his cum was all over the floor and some of it was on your fingers. He pulled away from you and he looked at you. You took that chance to insert your fingers into his mouth.

“Suck on it. It’s only fair if you taste yourself too.” He sucked your fingers, and he tried as hard as he could not to turn exactly that, hard again. You pulled your fingers out of his mouth and he started to pull you to kiss you, but then he looked at his watch. “Your exam!” He said and you were brought back to earth.

Your eyes widened and you started to fix your hair and straighten your clothes. You started to look around for your underwear, and Harry was handing it to you. You saw this as an opportunity and you said “Keep it. Maybe then you’ll actually touch yourself thinking about me better.” He flushed and you winked at him as you left the classroom. Once you left and Harry could no longer see you, you started running towards your exam.

***

Brilliant. That was one way to describe their exit. You weren’t clapping but you wanted to. Draco and the rest of the inquisitorial squad were standing furiously. They were far away from you trying to help Umbridge recover from the shock. You were pulled quickly and kissed, you pulled away to find Harry looking distressed. You looked at him questioningly, you looked around and no one was looking at you due to the chaos of the Weasley twins’ exit. Granger and Weasley, however, looking at you two from a far enough distance. “I’m leaving.”

You furrowed your eyebrows and you asked, “What do you mean? There’s still twelve days until school ends.” He cupped your face and he shook his head. You understood that he was leaving now. He pressed his lips to yours and you wondered when he became so in touch with his feelings, let alone his feelings for you. “I want to see you in summer.”

Butterflies erupted in your stomach at his words but you rolled your eyes at his stupidity. “Yeah right.” You scoffed. He leaned closer to you and he started stroking your cheeks with his thumbs. “I want to see you.” You really wanted that, but honestly when, where and was he actually thinking that it could happen. “My place or yours.” you laughed slightly, once again using humor as a coping mechanism.

“I like you and I like you a lot. So much that I can’t stay one summer without seeing you.” Harry was shocked by what he was saying and by your expression he was sure that you were too. How could he be so certain of his feelings that changed in less than 48 hours. In hindsight Hermione and Ron knew it was coming for a long time. Last night, while he was laying in his bed, he realized that he’s liked you for a long time. Honestly, her stupidly perfect smile! He was an idiot for not seeing it before. Hermione called out his name and motioned for him to come, and he remembered Sirius. “I’ll find a way!” He pecked your lips and he ran off. The next day, you read the daily profit and you read what happened.

***

This summer was the worst one yet. Since your father was put in Azkaban, the dark lord wanted someone to have the mark to assure the Malfoy family’s loyalty to him. It was either you or Draco. He wouldn’t have let you get the mark, so he got it himself. He cried that night, and you held him tightly. You helped him with the mark, it burned him and it stinged. Despite Draco’s efforts the dark lord found out about Harry’s affections for you, but not yours for Harry. You still don’t know if it’s better this way than the other way around or not. To make it clear, the information that reached the Dark Lord was that you and Harry kissed, not other news. Just what all of Hogwarts knows. Some Slytherin told their parents about it and because of the Dark Lord’s ability to read minds, he found out.

So you had a task as well, distract him; and if you can get information. You hated it. What you hated even more, is the amount of letters that Harry’s sent to the manor; but what really stung is how all of them were unanswered. He put your father into Azkaban and he expected you to reply to his letters like you were pen pals or something.

What you didn’t know is that Harry was told by Dumbledore to do the exact same thing. For the first time in his life, he wasn’t going to do what Dumbledore told him. No one knows that. He couldn’t tell anyone, everyone else thought it was a brilliant idea. What was he going to say? Oh, I can’t do that because I think I’m starting to fall in love with her! He was waiting in his compartment along with Ron and Hermione.

When he saw you walk outside their compartment. His heart leaped from his chest, and Hermione said “Don’t Harry.” His eyes only flickered back to them quickly, he stood up and he said “I’m just going to do what Dumbledore said to do.” Hermione knew better than to think that it was the only reason.

He opened the door and looked for you. He saw you walking quickly towards the Slytherin compartments, but he also noticed you were near the toilets. They were unoccupied. He picked up the pace of his walking and he grabbed your waist. He swiftly pulled you into the toilet with the door shut behind him. As soon as the door closed your wand was at his throat and he was stiff. He saw you register who pulled you into the toilet and you dropped your wand.

He had the goofiest smile on his face and you didn’t like how it made butterflies shoot all over your stomach. “Hi.” He said, as if he did nothing. As if you had actually replied to his sixty two letters all summer. You folded your arms and you looked at the floor. His smile dropped, you couldn’t see it; but you knew it did. He put both his hands on your shoulders and he added, “I missed you.”

You didn’t reply. “I don’t know why you’re mad, but I know you are. I sort of picked up on that after the first thirty letters. I just want to say that whatever I did, I didn’t mean to-” You scoffed and he noticed that but he continued, “Just talk to me we’ll sort this out. Did you forget that I like you? Just give me a reaction, say something.”

You slapped him across his face.

He was gawking at you as he gently massaged his cheek. “You have some nerve saying all that shit Potter! First of all, sixty two letters, are you bloody insane? Did you forget that I like you-” You said the last part in a poor imitation of his voice and you continued, “Oh, and you didn’t mean to. You didn’t mean to put my father in Azkaban?-” You watched as his face changed in understanding, “Tell how does someone accidentally put another person, let alone the girl-” You added air quotes as you said in a high pitched teasing tone, “you like so much that you can’t spend a summer without seeing her-”

“I lost your underwear.”

You blinked at him quickly and you said “What?” He started fiddling with his fingers, he was nervous. It was cute and you hated it because you were mad at him. “The one you gave me, before I left. I had it in my trunk and I made sure it was safe and everything. Then one night back in summer, I was um-” A red tint covered his cheeks, and he added, “I was using it to touch myself and I know you’re going to make fun of me for that, but I did. Then it got messy and I tried to put in the laundry, but Aunt Petunia found it. She didn’t let me have it back, because how filthy it is for me to have your underwear. Dudley annoyed me all summer because of that. I’m sorry about that and about your father. I wasn’t the one to put him behind bars and I didn’t do it willingly, I promise. I was just trying to save my godfather. You’re also the first girl I’ve ever really really liked and I don’t want to mess it up, so will you forgive me?” He sucked in a deep breath, and he looked at you with pleading eyes.

He added a please for good measure and you rolled your eyes as you said, “Fine. I forgive you.” He had a bright smile on his face and he puckered his lips and started to lean towards you. You put your hand up and he ended up kissing your palm. He furrowed his eyebrows and his lips turned to a cute pout. “But I can’t be with you.”

The sadness you saw in his eyes is something you’ll never be able to erase. He knew why so he didn’t bother asking. Draco was still a death eater and a monologue in the train toilet wasn’t going to change that. He didn’t know this, but there were still plenty of other reasons why you two couldn’t be together. He nodded his head and he whispered looking at the ground. “Can I at least kiss you, just this once?”

Once wouldn’t hurt, right? You stepped towards him and you tiled his chin towards you and you pressed your lips against his. It felt even better than the last time. He pulled you closer and your head was lost because you couldn’t stop kissing him and he couldn’t stop kissing you. You pulled away for the third time to catch your breath, you tapped his shoulder twice; and he understood. He pulled away from you and looked at you with a look you couldn’t quite understand. He quickly pecked your lips and he then added, “I’m sorry. I just couldn’t help myself.”

You stepped away from him because you knew that if you didn’t, you’d steal a kiss from him. “You should get out, I’m here might as well change into my robes.” He nodded and excited the toilet. No one saw him. He leaned against the door and he sighed. He loves you, he realized that because it wouldn’t hurt this much if he just liked you. He didn’t know why but to contradict his new revelation, he entered the Slytherin compartment looking for the other Malfoy.

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[harrys-yellow-snow]

perfect - an h.s one shot °•. ✿ .•°

PART FIVE - FINAL PART

read part one here ! part two here ! part three here ! part four here !

word count: 3.5k

themes/triggers/tropes: fluff, angst, lime, arguing, fake dating, relationship...fixing?

New York City was cooler than usual the night Nova arrived. Around May or June, the nights were almost as hot as the middle of the afternoon. She settled down and went to sleep. When she woke up the next morning, she received a text from Harry.

H.♡: I’m in New York. Can I come to your place?

Nova sighed, opening the text. A bright blue bubble filled her vision as she read it over again. Only a few words changed her mood for the day completely. Her fingers got to work, even though they didn’t need to work much.

Nova: Sure.

She placed her phone down again and went into the kitchen. How long until he gets here? She thought. Probably not long, so she started making a cup of tea. She poured the tea in with the bag, tossed in three sugars, and a tiny cup of milk, stirred it, all within a couple minutes. 

A knock at the door came along with a short text from him. She opened it with a deep breath. She was met with that same tall figure in a black sweatshirt and sunglasses sitting on his slightly curved hairline. He smiled, standing upright after leaning against the doorframe, putting his phone into his pocket.

“Wasn’t expecting you to come to the city. Come in.” She opened the door wider and he instantly sat at her favorite spot, looking out at the city skyline. The Empire State Building was glistening in the sunlight.

“How have you been?” he asked softly with his fingers stroking his chin as he turned to face her.

Nova laughed as she went over to the kitchen and took the napkin off of the top of the tea cup. She went over to him and handed it to him, much to his surprise. “We saw each other a couple days ago. Nothing’s changed.”

“Alright. Thanks for the tea.” He took a sip and looked out the window again.

“Has anything changed with you?”

“I broke up with Evangeline.”

“What? Why?”

He stared at her and gave no response.

“Were things going wrong?” She asked. He let out a scoff and put his tea down. Nova uncomfortably shifted on the couch. 

“You don’t listen to me, do you?”

“What do you mean?”

“I told you that I started dating her so I could get over you. She agreed with the idea, but she claimed that I used her, which made me feel great,” he said with a sarcastic tone in his voice. Nova slightly raised an eyebrow and then remembered. Yes, he did tell her about that.

“So I guess you’re over me,” she replied. Harry closed his eyes and rubbed his temple.

“Did the other night not prove to you that I want you back?”

The memories flashed through her head as she stared into those glowing green eyes. The clothes on the floor, the dim lights, the curtains closed, just a little sunlight seeping through onto the bed. Those sinful sounds that replayed in her head every time she looked at him.

“Yes, yes it did.”

“Good,” he said reassuringly. “You’re not going to make yourself any tea?”

“No, not right now.”

“Oh, alright.” They sat in that uncomfortable silence until he finished his tea and had enough of the city view. He got up and went over to the sink to wipe out the cup with soap and water and place it back in the cabinet with the other floral designed cups.

“Ah, I wish you’d have given me this blue cup. It looks beautiful.”

“Oh, sorry,” she said in the same sarcastic tone he had before. He laughed and sat on the couch next to her. His arm slowly crept behind her back, his hand grasping her shoulder and he pulled her closer. Her head unintentionally landed on his shoulder. She could practically feel that perfect grin spread across his face.

“How did Evangeline feel about you breaking up with her?” Nova snuck her hand across his chest and tapped a finger on his collarbone. Why did this feel wrong?

“She wasn’t too happy. She yelled at me a bunch, told me I was using her and that I was a liar. She’s the one that came up with the goddamn idea and I told her that. I told her we were just friends, then I went back inside. I wanted to help her, but it felt wrong.” He explained.

“She shouldn’t have treated you like that. You clearly said it was fake dating, didn’t you?”

“I did.” He quickly turned his head down to look at her as her head crept onto his chest. A small smirk twitched on his lips, but they formed into a thin line. “Was she using me?” 

“Nobody was using anybody. It was just a silly little agreement…” her sentence trailed off as she walked her fingers across his chest and up to his neck. He tried his hardest not to smile, but it was practically impossible with those soft fingers touching every inch of his visible skin that they could. They went up to his hair and played with the loose strands poking out from the thin layer of gel he must have used that morning. 

“Now I probably—most definitely—lost a friend.”

“You shouldn’t have. I don’t really like the idea of fake dating, but if you claim she agreed to it, then I guess it’s fine.”

“If I claim? What are you on about?” he asked, this time in a slight whisper. “That’s what she told me.”

“I don’t want to start an argument, Harry. It really doesn’t matter because you never truly loved her, right?” she asked, positioning herself on top of, both legs on both sides of his. She was finally towering over him instead.

“T-that’s right,” he stuttered because of the new situation. Her dominant side showed as she took his face in her hands and planted a soft kiss on his lips. One after another, until she pulled away to find a pout forming from his bottom lip.

“How about we go out? Just the two of us. We haven’t done that in a while.” She climbed off of him and went over to the door to slide her jacket on.

“Where?”

“Wherever you want,” she smiled. 

“How about an art museum? A traditional museum, or maybe even a modern one. Sculptures and stuff.”

“Sure. That sounds great.” 

As they walked out, he planted a quick kiss on her forehead, making her cheek flush a bright, tomato red.

°•. ✿ .•°

At that point, paint was splattered against the marble walls of the museum. Every square inch was covered in beautiful, perfect paintings, sculptures, and pottery. He took her hand and led her into a huge room, dimly lit from translucent bulbs above. The paintings were of sailing ships, crashing through the waves of a horrendous storm, beautifully portrayed by the monotonous color schemes, spread across the lonely canvas in search for a true meaning; a meaning only the artist would understand. Deep inside, the work meant something so much more than a sailor struggling through the waves. It illustrated the artist’s fights with their mental health, possibly even physical health. It reminded her of a man sitting in a rocking chair, staring out at the midnight sea from the porch of his beach house. Clouds billowed overhead, lightning seen in the distance. Did the man seem to care? No, not at all. He was fascinated by the view. He imagined that very ship being his own. His own problems crashed through the waves, trying its best to stay afloat.

Nothing could take her away from this painting. She felt his large frame come up behind her, lightly brushing her shoulder with his leather coat. He glanced over at her and smiled with a longing stare of gratitude and sympathy. 

“You like this painting, don’t you?” He asked in a soft tone. Almost as soft as the way the dim light reflected onto the rough canvas.

She nodded, not taking her eyes off of it. He pushed her shoulder with him and she giggled, finally looking away from the painting and into his eyes. This time, they glistened, not battled. This time, they were a watery emerald, not a chipped and battered obsidian. This time, they sent butterflies to her heart, not daggers. Over the past few days, she pulled them out, one by one.

“This is really beautiful,” he muttered.

“Yeah, the whole room has paintings like this. Dark and deep in meaning. Usually to reflect the artist’s own personal struggles, but they were created so long ago that this was their only way to cope. They had no one to talk to because no one would believe them. But their canvas would. Their canvas would believe everything the artist said, no matter how traumatizing or life threatening it may have been. It was always there for them.”

“Like a therapist?”

“Exactly. Just like a therapist. We’re lucky most of us get that access to support. Back then… this could’ve been this artist’s last painting…”

“Right.” Both their voices trailed off when they realized where this conversation had led to. An ultimate disaster. They decided to move to the next room. Sculptures, exactly what Harry was looking forward to.

“I’ve always been fascinated by the effort that gets put into the making of these pieces,” he claimed, jogging up to one and almost falling over the thin banister around the artwork. He pointed to the tall, marble man with his cutest bunny smile plastered on his face. “Like, come over here,” he beckoned Nova over, “look at all these little details! You can practically see the skin texture.”

“I can see that you’re a lot more into sculptures than I am,” she said, taking the closest look she could at the face of the man, then down his torso (avoiding the privates) and down his legs to his feet. “I think they’re really cool.”

“What, because they don’t have as much spiritual and mental meaning behind them like those paintings?”

“Not entirely,” she started to explain, “I just think that more of a story can be told through the paintings. Having visually pleasing pictures is easier for me to appreciate when I can interpret it in hundreds of ways than having a singular face. Yes, full of detail, but where’s the story? So, I guess, yeah, paintings are deeper than sculptures.”

“That’s an interesting argument.”

“Are you going to start one?”

“No. I stand by my point, though. I still like my sculptures.” He smiled and gazed back to the marble figure. Nova didn’t care about the sculpture, though. She stared at him. His dark curls fell perfectly into place on his forehead. They swayed when he moved his neck up and bounced when he put it back down. His smile was like a fireplace on a cold, winter evening, sitting by the fire with a cup of hot chocolate in their hands. They would snuggle together, squeezing their shoulders against each other for extra warmth. His smile is like honey, freshly gathered from the hive. The more bees, the more work, and the more love put into it, the more beautiful it became. When that majestic grin spread across his innocent face, there were slight creases around his eyes. Little wrinkles, but not from age. Never. He’s much too young. Those creases complimented his eyes as well as a bright blue sea and sun setting on the horizon. Calming, cool breeze, slight disruptions in the sky. Yet, instead of a blue sea, his sea was green. A fern green with hints of hazel wood and polluted waters. They sparkled in any light. From the natural light seeping through the window pane to the light calling her towards him, coming straight from his heart. Near that glisten in his eyes was his button nose. 

When she ran her finger down the bridge, over the knob, and down to the tip, he would squirm and throw her that grin. Her finger would move straight down to his lips. His top lip was thin, perfectly shaped by the indentation in the middle. Moving across to the left and right are the most marvelous curves on a pair of lips she had ever seen. Down onto his bottom lip, her finger would trip up, sending the softness vibrating like the thickest guitar string. The next part that catches her eye is his neck. Baby smooth skin, all the way down to his collarbone and his chest. His arms, torso, down to his legs and feet. His backside and ankles deserved more attention.

When their eyes met, her face flushed with a strange shade of pink and red. Not quite maroon, just a bit lighter. Her blood pumped through her veins at an alarming rate, unhealthy, some would say. He grinned for her again. Her hands shuddered like being put into a freezer, but she was burning up. All of his grace and his truthfulness sum him up as the most wonderful man she had ever met. Nothing before had applied to him anymore. It was over for good, and they both knew it.

After exploring the rest of the museum, he made a suggestion.

“That was great. How about we head home now? My legs are starting to hurt.” He said, sitting down on a nearby bench in front of a huge, abstract box painting, filled with reds, blues, greens, and yellows, jumbled together in perfect harmony.

“Good idea.” Nova sat down next to him, their elbows touching. She stared down at his hand on his lap. Her fingers trailed up his leg, tapping his kneecap, which he surprisingly didn’t notice. Their fingers intertwined slowly, taking each finger and placing it in between each other. They said nothing, other than smiling. An apologetic smile came from Harry, yet a forgiving smile came from Nova. She looked out and saw a group of girls staring at them, pointing at Harry. She let go of his hand. One of the girls got on the phone and was still staring at him, excited out of her mind. One had her phone out and tried sneaking a picture.

“I-I think we should go.” She grabbed his arm and pulled him out, quickly ending up on the sidewalk and rushing down the street.

“What’s wrong?”

“People noticed us. Some girl was on the phone and another took some pictures.”

Hand in hand, she practically sprinted down the street, dragging him close behind. They were both out of breath by the time they reached the street of her apartment, but they were greeted with a not-so-pleasant surprise. At least five black cars, paparazzi came tumbling out, snapping pictures right away, charging at them. They threw each other frightening glances as he wrapped his arm around her shoulder, pulling her down the road. The cars came up faster and so did the photographers. Faster than they appeared, they ended up right on their tails, cornering them. 

When Nova tried to escape, she was met with hard ground, the sidewalk crushed her face. Everything became blurry, but she felt a hand snake around her hips.

“Nova!” Harry’s hands ran across her back and over her shoulders, picking her up. A stream of thick blood slipped down her face. He covered it up with his finger, but the paparazzi were still snapping pictures of them on the ground.

She wasn’t able to tell what it was, but Harry did something remarkable to make the paparazzi scurry into their cars like little rabbits rushing away from a predator. 

“It’s alright, Nova. We’ll get you safe.” He led her down the rest of her street as she let tears and blood stream down her face. It stung, along with countless parts of her body that hit the sidewalk harder than she expected.

Her apartment was blurry from tears. He sat her down on the couch and got her a tissue. She could see his hands were covered in blood. If anyone else saw him, they’d think he had killed a man.

“Keep your head up and squeeze it hard, alright? I need to get you some gauze and hydrogen peroxide. It’s in your bathroom, right?” She nodded and he whisked himself away to get the first aid materials.

He came back with what he promised: a new bottle of hydrogen peroxide, rolls of gauze, boxes of four different sized bandages, and some paper towels. He sat down next to her and wiped her cheek with a soft tissue. Tears rolled down her cheeks and they wouldn’t stop.

“Shhh, it’s okay, darling. We’ll get you patched up, alright?” He lightly and slowly rubbed her abc and planted a kiss on her cheek, making her cheeks flush an unexpected pink. When she cried like this, she became incredibly cold, shivering from the top of her head all the way down to her toes. She would layer herself in t-shirt after hoodie after bath robe, trying to make the cold and the pain go away. Heavy layers provided her a comfort she would never have gotten from anyone else, unless he was there.

Harry began unrolling the gauze and placing a paper towel on the coffee table. He got to his knees and folded up the gauze, pouring tiny droplets of hydrogen peroxide on it. He sent her an approving glance, to which she nodded back, knowing that it might sting. It did, as he applied the gauze to her arm where part of her had fallen. He took off the gauze and wiped it with a damp paper towel. To her, this implied that it was a clean cut and no dirt crawled in.

“Let me find the rest of your cuts, love.” The way that he called her “love” made her stomach churn. She hadn’t heard him call her a term of endearment in so long. It was something she longed for, for countless days and nights, just to be known as his “love” or his “sweetheart.” Nothing warmed her heart more than that.

He traveled across her body, searching for every nick, bruise, and cut he could find. There wasn’t much he could do about the bruises, however, other than lightly poke them to see how painful they really were. She winced at the pain of a couple on her face, which he kissed for extra comfort.

After patching her up with bandages and wrapping her small muscle in gauze, he pulled her in and let her onto his lap, placing a kiss on the top of her head.

“I’m really sorry.” she whispered, falling back onto his chest. He ran his hands through her hair, lightly scraping the tip of her scalp, then pulling at the ends, twisting them around his fingers.

“Why?” His voice was soft again, like that night on the phone. She could barely keep her eyes open. Every few seconds, they fluttered open again. She wanted to look up at him, but she couldn;t crane her head back far enough to see his whole face. Just his soft hair and the very edge of his hairline.

“Because I got us caught again.”

“Darling,” he kissed her head a few more times and ran his hands up her face, trying his best to avoid poking any bruises, “it was my idea to go out together. I should be the one apologizing, so I’m sorry. I’m the one that got you hurt, so I take full responsibility.” He sighed and kissed her again. If only they could stay like this forever…

“It’s alright. You saved me from being trampled, though.”

“I’d do anything for you. I made a mistake, so I tried my best to fix it,” he explained.

“We both made mistakes and fixed them, right?”

“What do you mean?”

“We’re back together. All of that is behind us. We’re never gonna mention it again.”

“Never.”

“You promise?” She asked, turning her head to slightly face him. She had a bad feeling her neck looked incredibly strange, so she just turned her entire body, lying completely on top of him. He was surprised by this sudden movement and smiled, placing yet another kiss on her forehead and a new one on the tip of her nose.

“I promise.”

“Are you sure?” He laughed. He missed all the times they would tease each other, playing around, either with words or with each other. Having all their good memories flood back was better than no memories at all.

“Yes, love, I’m sure.” His arm snaked around her back and his hand grasped her waist. They cuddled in silence for a few minutes until Nova broke it.

“H?”

“You haven’t called me that in a while,” he smiled, stroking her hair, “what’s up?”

“Am I good enough for you?”

Harry looked mildly offended, “Why wouldn’t you be?”

“I don’t know,” she sighed, running her finger across his chest, down the firm outlines of his tight shirt, down to his stomach. He flinched and held in a giggle. “I just don’t think I meet your standards.”

“Honey,” he said, “you’re the entire reason why I have standards.”

“I’m not perfect enough. Look at me.” She picked her head up off of his chest, but he took it in his hands and closed the gap between them, sending sparks through their veins.

“Nova, you’re nothing but perfect.”

i'm not a big fan of the ending, but yk. gotta push through.

i was thinking of turning off the ask my anything chat because of mild hate comments (it's really hard for me to stay motivated when i know someone doesn't like it). so it might be a while until the next one shot.

i do appreciate the support i've gotten through this one shot, though! for those who did enjoy, how did you like it? i pantsed my way through this whole thing. that's why there's little plot holes, so it's not perfect lol.

#harry styles #niall horan #fanfic #harry styles fanfiction #liam payne #louis tomlinson #one direction #writers on tumblr #angst #fanfiction #harry styles fluff #fluff

[pumpkinbirth]

In a home birth, the husband tries checking for dilation in his labouring wife (don't blame him he's curious) and unintentionally stimulates her G spot multiple times.

This turns into fingering and vaginal sex. The midwife sees them getting at it and decides to give them privacy for the moment.

"Okay, she said she'll be here as soon as traffic lets up." You said, turning your attention back to me after ending the call with our midwife. I just nodded at first, letting out a series of measured breaths as I rode out this latest contraction. A look of sympathy crossed your face as you returned to my side, your hand coming to rest on mine, petting my swollen, twin-filled belly.

"I can feel them moving around so much," I whined softly, resting my head back on the mountain of pillows keeping me propped up on our bed. "Just wish I could start pushing already."

"I'm sorry, baby...how much longer until you can?"

"Not until I'm fully dilated, and I won't know when that is until she gets here." I replied, frustration lacing my voice. There was just silence for a minute, as you wracked your brain trying to remember one of our prior meetings with our midwife, when she'd explained how dilation worked. Eventually, you spoke up.

"If you want, I could try checking you...?"

"Would you?" I asked, looking up at you hopefully. At this point I was desperate for any kind of relief, even from an amateur checkup. Affection brightened your face as you kissed my cheek, brushing my hair behind my ear.

"Of course! Pretty sure I remember how she said to do it," you murmured, repositioning so you were situated between my legs. Gently spreading my thighs wider apart, you took in the sight of my laboring pussy; flushed, sensitive, still glistening with my water that had broken a few hours ago. Before you could get too distracted by it, you refocused yourself. Carefully you traced the seam of my lips with two fingers, eliciting a quiet sigh from me which soon escalated into a moan as I felt you easing those fingers inside me.

Swallowing thickly, you started to feel around as best you could, probing for my cervix. You stopped when I suddenly bucked my hips, and looked up to see an embarrassed smile on my flushed cheeks.

"S-sorry...felt really good when you did that."

You grinned broadly, your fingers resuming their search. After a few minutes, you'd finally found what you were looking for. As you carefully got a feel for how open I was, my hips twitched again as one of your knuckles pressed against my clit.

"So sensitive, huh?" An amused chuckle left you, and all I could do was blush deeper. "Well, unfortunately, I don't think you're all the way dilated yet," I let out a frustrated huff at this, but you continued. "Good news, though, is I think I've found a way to take your mind off of waiting."

"How's tha-aahhht!!" I started to ask, but soon let out a startled yelp as you drew your fingers back just a bit, now purposefully curling them against my g-spot. You raised an eyebrow suggestively, and I immediately nodded, catching on quickly. "Please, babe...I wanna feel good...!" I whimpered as you kept curling and uncurling your fingers, your thumb pressed firmly against my clit. In the meantime you used your free hand to quickly undo your pants, tugging them down enough to free your cock.

"Fuck, of course...god, you look so good like this," You withdrew your fingers but kept rubbing my clit, slicking the head of your cock with my juices before shallowly thrusting inside me. Everything was so overly sensitive that just feeling the stretch of you inside my cunt was almost enough to make me cum. The feeling was also enough to trigger another contraction, and I moaned loudly through this one, my hands gripping fistfuls of the sheets.

The sensation of my cunt constricting around you was unlike anything you'd ever felt, and you didn't waste any more time, building up an intense pace as you fucked me through my steadily progressing labor.

The chorus of our moans was enough that we didn't even hear the front door opening, or the footsteps down the hall. By the time the midwife was halfway through our bedroom door, you'd hitched one of my legs up onto your shoulder, fucking me deep and watching reverently as my belly bounced with every thrust.

Instead of announcing herself she ducked back out into the hallway, letting out a soft chuckle. "That's one way to help things along."

#pumpkin answers #pumpkin writes #pregnancy kink #labor kink

[fandom-imagines-stories]

Risk Assessment

Don Eppes x Reader

Words: 3844

Part Two of Three

Summary: As your feelings for each other push boundaries you’d both set for yourselves a long time ago, Don distances himself during a tough case and you have to decide if your relationship is worth the risk.

Notes: I know it’s been a minute, but I haven’t forgotten about my Don fans out there (we are few, but we are powerful haha) I love this show and the brother dynamic and Don’s emotional complexity is just so fun to write. I will hopefully have the last part up at some point soon. 

More Don: HERE 

-

You took the stairs two at a time, heart beating out of your chest, and mind reeling. You didn’t hear the nurses asking you if you needed help over the panic in your head. All the news said was that there was a shootout between a suspect and FBI agents. Many casualties, including one agent in critical condition. 

So when Megan called you that he’d be here, you’d almost gotten sick waiting in traffic. How she’d known to call you, you hadn’t given much thought to. 

By the time you reached the right floor, you couldn’t breathe, your eyes were blurring with tears, and your legs wanted to give out. But you kept going. 

Doctors rushed by with a gurney and all you saw was the blood. 

You started to follow them. 

He found you first. 

Don put one hand on your shoulder to stop you from rushing after the gurney and one hand on your cheek to bring your eyes to his. 

“Don,” you sobbed, shaking your head and blinking away tears, worried he’d be gone when you looked again. “I thought- I hadn’t heard anything and I-”

“I’m okay, baby. See?” He motioned to the bandaged cut on his forehead. “I’m fine. Just take a deep breath for me, sweetheart.” 

“Oh my God,” you threw your arms around his neck. “Thank God. I saw the news and I just knew you were there. I had this awful feeling and then Megan…” You trailed off, burying your face in his neck. 

Don nodded. “Megan told me she called you, but your connection got cut off.” He pulled back to kiss your forehead. “I’m sorry for worrying you, but I’m okay. I promise.” 

“No, I’m sorry,” you sniffed, wiping your face with the back of your hand. “I should have waited. Instead, I barged in here like, well, like the FBI.” 

He led you over to some chairs where you could both sit, not letting go of your hand. From around the corner, Megan came with a pair of coffees from the cafeteria, stopping when she saw the two of you. She ducked back behind the corner before either of you saw. 

“You’re really okay?” You asked, fingers grazing the wound on his head. 

“Yeah,” he shrugged. “I got pushed out of the way by…” His eyes followed the trail of doctors hurrying with the person you’d seen before. “Her name’s Anderson. Took a bullet to the neck.” 

“Jesus.” 

“Worst part is, the guy got away.” His grip on your hand tightened. “This sicko that’s been shooting people in broad daylight and we almost had him and he still got away.” 

He swallowed hard and kept his eyes on the hall. 

A silence fell between you as you calmed down and his shoulders tensed. Finally taking a deep breath, you sighed. 

“Don, I’m so sorry.” 

He let go of your hand. “It’s not like you pulled the trigger.” Don ran his fingers through his hair and sighed. “You know, you really aren’t supposed to be here and I think I’ve freaked you out enough for the night, huh? Why don’t you go back to your place and I’ll meet you there?”

You were taken aback, but not totally surprised. When it came to stuff like this, your boyfriend wasn’t the most open. But, then again, neither were you. It was something you had in common- bottle it up and hope it doesn’t burst. 

“Yeah, okay.” You stood, kissing the top of his head. “I can make something up for you, if you want? I think I’ve still got some of that pasta you liked. I can throw it in the microwave.”

“That’d be great, actually.” He tilted his chin up, pulling your lips to his for one more kiss. “I’ll call if anything else happens, okay? And I promise, if the connection goes bad, I won’t leave you hanging.” 

“I’ll hold you to that, Agent Eppes.” You kept looking back at him as you left as if waiting for him to call you back. But he didn’t. So you left.

Now with the seat open, Megan crossed the room to sit beside her team leader.

“So that’s the mystery woman,” she said, handing him the coffee. 

“Mystery woman?” He scoffed. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“Come on, for the past four months you show up to work with this big grin on your face and then this happens-”

“Speaking of which,” he interrupted. “What the hell were you thinking calling her? You know, it really freaked her out. She didn’t know what happened and she comes sprinting in here like, I don’t know, I’m dying. I hate doing that to her.”

“Don.” Megan shook her head. “You’re the one who told me to call her.” 

His brows furrowed. “What?”

“I mean, sure, you were kinda out of it from hitting your head, but you just kept saying, ‘Y/N. Call Y/N. I want to see her.’ So you gave me your phone and I called her,” she explained. 

Don leaned back in the chair, piecing together bits of fuzzy memory. He took a drink of coffee. 

“Huh.” 

Megan nodded, drinking from her own cup. “So you guys seem pretty serious.” 

“Megan…” He groaned. 

“I’m just saying, if she’s the one you’re asking for in your hour of need, it can’t just be a fling, right?”

“Isn’t it a crime to harass the guy with a head injury?” 

She opened her mouth to rebuttal, but both agent’s focus switched to the doctor approaching them. And from the looks of his expression, it wasn’t good. 

-

You heard more details on the news than you did from Don. In the days following the shooting, authorities were in an intense manhunt for a man named Pete Nicholsen, the lead suspect in a series of killings involving a hooded shooter in public places. 

Agent Anderson was paralyzed from the neck down. 

That, you heard from Megan. 

In fact, you hadn’t heard anything from Don in two days. 

It was Charlie who invited you over for dinner. He said things had been tense and that having some company might be nice, especially since you and his brother seemed to get along at the lecture. 

He told you he might be in the garage, so he left the door unlocked. But when you opened the door, it was the older Eppes brother you saw first. 

Don sat in the living room. While there wasn’t any light, you could tell it was him by the way he sat, leaned forward with a beer in his hand. Like he had the weight of the world on his shoulders. 

“Hey stranger,” you greeted softly. 

Don’s back straightened up and his head whirled around. 

“Hey.” A small smile graced his lips and he stood to meet you. “What are you doing here?” 

“Charlie invited me. He thought a guest would make dinner less… tense.”

“I see,” Don grunted, running a hand down his face. “So he still doesn’t know?” 

You shrugged. “I didn’t tell him. He just thinks we ‘get along.’”

“I wonder what gave him that idea,” he smirked, putting a hand on your cheek and pulling you in for a kiss. 

You sighed against his lips, melting into his touch. You hadn’t stopped thinking about it for two days. Thinking about how he was at the hospital. That same tension was there now, even as he kissed you. 

“Don,” you said, pulling away. “Are you okay? I know that there’s been a lot going on, but you kinda vanished on me and I’m not going to lie, I’ve been pretty worried. I mean, I have to learn everything from the TV and sure, I get that maybe you don’t want to talk about it but-”

“Honey, slow down,” Don sighed. He leaned against the back of the chair, nodding. “You’re right, I had to step back for a couple of days. With what happened to Anderson and then you showing up at the hospital thinking it was me, when it should have been me, I don’t know, there was just a lot going through my head I had to deal with, okay?” He took your hand, running his thumb over your knuckles, slowly going back and forth to calm you down. Or to calm him down. He couldn’t really tell. “But I’m back now, alright? You don’t have to worry.” 

Despite his reassuring words, the tone of his voice only increased your already growing concern. You remembered the gut-churning panic you’d felt when you thought he was the one in that hospital bed. You thought about every surge of electricity you felt spark in you whenever he smiled. Even now, the way he was looking at you, guarded and all, you still just wanted him to look at you for forever. 

This is what you were afraid of and yet you didn’t want it to stop. 

“Don, I-” You started but were cut off by the sound of footsteps. 

“Hey, Y/N, you’re here.” Charlie beamed. “Dinner’s almost ready.” 

With his brother’s eyes on you, you stepped away from Don to join Charlie in the dining room, letting those three terrifying words die on your lips. 

-

It was your turn to play the ‘dealing alone’ game. Not out of pettiness, but out of protection. While your heart was so full and your chest ached when he wasn’t around, your brain reminded you of all the reasons you hadn’t wanted to let things get this far to begin with. You told yourself a long time ago that nothing was worth the risk of getting hurt again. 

And all of it was because of a stupid four-letter word. 

The repetitive rattle of your fingers against the table helped tune out the rest of the cafe. Unfortunately, that included your lunch date.

“You okay there?” Megan asked with an amused smile. “You look like you just joined Larry in space for a second.”

“Sorry,” you sighed, shaking your head. “I’ve just been thinking about a lot.” Sliding your empty plate aside, you eyed her curiously. “Like why you asked me to have lunch. I mean, don’t get me wrong, I’d love to have a badass FBI best friend, but this just felt a little out of the blue.” 

“Alright, you’ve got me there,” she admitted. “Though I wouldn’t mind having a brilliant criminology professor in my back pocket whenever I want to remind the boys that this job isn’t all about running around with a gun.” 

You both laughed and you felt some of the weight on your chest lighten. 

She took a drink of her coffee. “There is something I wanted to ask you about, if it isn’t overstepping our budding friendship…” 

“You’re wondering about how I know your team leader.”

“No, I know about the class you teach with Charlie, and Don complained about his little guest appearance the whole week leading up to it,” she said. A smirk teased her lips. “I was more wondering why you two are keeping your relationship a secret.” 

Your mouth fell open and she laughed. 

“I read people for a living, remember?” She pointed out. “I had some suspicions, but when he kept asking me to call you when he had that head injury and you came running into the hospital like John Wayne, it pretty much confirmed what I thought.” 

“He asked you to call me?”

Megan nodded. “Oh yeah. You were all he could talk about when he was all loopy. It was pretty cute, actually.” 

You covered your growing smile with your hand, imagining Don doped up on pain meds and rambling about you to his co-worker. But then you remembered the circumstances and remembered who was really hurt that day. 

“So you figured it out,” you shrugged. 

She pointed a finger at you playfully. “And you haven’t answered my question.” 

“It’s,” you took a deep breath, “complicated.”

“With Don? Shocker,” she teased. 

You both finished your meals and paid. On the way out, she put a hand on your arm, giving you a smile that was somewhere between friendly and concerned.

“This job can be a lot to handle, especially when you're involved romantically with someone in the field,” she said. “And I know Don isn’t much of a touchy-feely kinda guy, but I think that you’ve been really good for him. I mean, I’ve really never seen him so happy. But, like I said, I know it can be a lot so if you ever want to talk, I’m around, okay?” 

You laughed. “Thanks, but I pretty much wrote the book on ‘emotional detachment.’ I think I can handle Agent Eppes.”

She lifted her hands in mock surrender. “Maybe that’s even more reason to talk to someone about it.” 

With a look that conveyed the phrase ‘just think about it,’ she went back to her car and you walked back to yours, trying your best to shrug off her ability to not only read you, but also the issues that you were starting to notice in a relationship she shouldn’t even know about. 

-

Charlie was in the middle of explaining to the class the ways equations can be used to track the spread of a bioterrorism attack when you saw him. You looked up from the notes you were taking and there he was. Standing outside the window. Waving at you. He looked like a normal guy. Nice haircut, clean clothes, new-looking backpack. But something about him seemed familiar. While you couldn’t place from where, something in your gut was telling you to not look him in the eye. 

No one else seemed to notice him and he was gone by the end of the lecture. Still, you couldn’t shake the unease from your nerves. 

“Earth to Professor Y/L/N,” Charlie teased, waving a piece of chalk in front of your face. “If you really thought it was that boring, you could have just said so.” He smirked and took a seat across from you. 

You looked around. The students had all left and you hadn’t even noticed. 

“It was really interesting, Charlie. I’m sorry,” you sighed. “I guess my head is just somewhere else.” 

“Yeah, you uh,” he nodded, “you’ve kinda seemed that way for a while. Is everything okay? If the class has too much to your plate, I can take over some more of the grading-”

“Don’t be ridiculous. You already do too much as it is.” You stood, packing your class notes into your briefcase and hugging it to your chest. “Besides, I’m fine. I just haven’t been sleeping well.” His concern only deepened so you came up with something more reasonable than dreaming about his brother choking on his own blood with a hole in his throat. “New neighbors. Probably just some partying college kids.” 

“Uhuh,” he hummed, narrowing his eyes. Whether or not he believed you, he didn’t press the issue. Charlie wasn’t exactly great when it came to emotions and, while it was deeply bothering him to see someone he liked to think of as a friend in a bad place, if it wasn’t solvable through math, there wasn’t much he could do. 

“Do you want to go grab some coffee?” You asked, hoping to change the subject. The last thing you needed right now was a line of questions that you weren’t ready to answer. 

“Coffee sounds perfect.” 

You were both halfway to the campus cafe when you heard the shots. At first, you thought someone had set off fireworks or something, but you remembered the man outside of the window. You’d seen him on the news. 

Pete Nicholsen.

-

He took the stairs two at a time, sprinting into the courtyard where campus security, police, and other FBI had already gathered, along with a whole audience of students and staff. Don didn’t give himself time to think. He just ran.

Don spotted Sinclair first, standing over the body of a woman with Y/H/C hair. She wore a blazer and had a briefcase busted open just a few inches away from her hand. He tried to calm his breathing as his mind went into a frenzy. 

The call was shots fired at Cal Sci. One casualty. Female. He only had one thought. 

What had he brought you into?

“Who is it?” He asked his fellow agent. 

“We’re looking for her I.D. in her things now,” David explained. 

“I need it now, damnit!” Don ran around to the other side, hoping to be able to see the woman’s face, and tried to prepare himself to see yours.  

“Agent Eppes!” A voice called from the crowd. 

He spun on his heel, frantically scanning the group of students. 

“Don!” 

He turned again and saw you. 

All of the breath in his lungs exhaled in a sigh of relief. He motioned to Colby that he’d be right back and rushed across the courtyard. It took every ounce of control he could muster not to pass the police line and pull you into his arms just to make sure you were really there. 

“Are you okay? Were you out here when it happened?” He asked, making sure to keep a step away to maintain his composure. “Where’s Charlie?”

“I’m fine. And he’s working with Larry to get a jumpstart into figuring out where this guy could have gone after he-” You caught a glimpse of the body through the crowd of law enforcement. “Oh my god.” 

“Hey, just look at me, okay?” He whispered. “Keep your eyes on me, sweetheart.” 

“Don.” You blinked, took a deep breath, and focused back on him. “Don, I saw him.” 

He froze, that same sinking weight in his chest coming back. “What?” 

“He was outside-” You ran your fingers through your hair, trying not to panic. “Nicholsen was outside of the classroom. With me and Charlie. He waved at me like he knew who I was.” 

Cal Sci. One Casualty. Female. 

“Okay,” he cleared his throat and nodded. “Okay, then I’m going to need you to come with me. And we should go get Charlie.” Don motioned to Colby and the others again, pointing in the direction of Charlie’s office. They continued investigating the crime scene. “This just got a lot more complicated.” 

He helped you push through the crowd, his eyes scanning every face expecting to see Nicholsen’s confident smirk looking back at him. Once out of the way of the scene, Don found a deserted hallway and let his barrier break. He locked you in his embrace, cradling the back of your head with his shaking hand. 

“I don’t have to tell you what I thought when I got that call,” he said against your shoulder. 

You rubbed your hand back and forth across his tense shoulders. “I guess we’ve traded places this week.”

Don pulled back. “That’s not funny.”

“I’m not trying to be,” You looked at him and those dark eyes and nodded determinedly. “I want to catch this guy, Don.” 

“No.” He started walking toward his brother’s office. “You aren’t touching this case anymore. Neither is Charlie. This guy knows who you both are. I’m not giving him a chance to take another shot at you.” 

“You can’t be serious-”

“What do you think that is?” He shouted, spinning around and pointing back toward the courtyard. “It’s a message, Y/N. That is a warning shot. The next time, he isn’t going to miss and I can’t let that happen. I-” 

Three words lingered on his lips, brought out by the terrifying thought of losing you. 

Don swallowed hard and continued down the hall. “We have to go.” 

The truth was, he had two thoughts when he got that call.

Please not her. 

I love her. 

And it scared him to death. 

-

His apartment was dark. When you unlocked the door with the key he’d given you, it didn’t even look like he was home. But once you got into the living room, he was there like he’d been at Charlie’s place. Alone. In the dark. With a bottle of beer in his hand and a blank stare in his eyes. 

“Don?” 

He jumped, blinking up at you like you’d pulled him out of a trance.

“Hey. I didn’t even hear you come in,” he said. He sounded exhausted, but there was something else too. Something that worried you. 

“I looked over some data with Charlie. He thinks he might be able to figure out how to finally catch this son of a bitch.” You sat on the arm of the chair, rubbing his shoulders. 

He shrugged you away. “I thought I told you that you were both off the case.” 

You stood again, crossing your arms. “And you thought that was going to work?” You scoffed. “Have you met your brother?” 

Don set the bottle down on the side table so hard you thought it might break. 

“Damnit, Y/N, you saw the guy outside of your classroom,” he snapped. “He shot a woman on your campus that matches your description.” He stood too, looking you in the eye. “He’s still out there and you think this is a joke?” 

“Charlie isn’t going to hide, Don,” you fired back. “And neither am I. The quicker we find this guy, the quicker all of this is over, right?”

“It isn’t that simple.” 

“Don,” you sighed, reaching out for him again. This time, he didn’t pull away, but when your hand found his cheek, you recognized the look in his eye. 

Conclusion. 

“Donnie, what is this about?” 

He took a deep breath and gently took your hand away. “I don’t think I can do this anymore.” 

You opened your mouth but found your throat had gone dry and the air had left your lungs. 

Don clenched his jaw to keep himself in control. Already, a voice in his head was screaming at him to stop, repeating those same two thoughts from before. 

Please.

I love her.

But that was exactly why he had to. He’d realized today how much he had to lose. And he couldn’t bear the weight pushing down on his chest. Maybe it was time to let it go. 

As the tear slipped down your cheek, he hated himself for the weakness that got him there. He couldn’t protect you. He wasn’t strong enough to face those emotions of panic and loss like he got a glimpse of today. You deserved someone who could hold you without thinking about everything going wrong. 

You didn’t say anything. You just went into his bedroom, grabbed a few of your things, and walked to the door, stopping to look back at the man you’d fallen so totally in love with and loved him all the same even though your heart was breaking. 

“I thought we were worth the risk, you know.” Was all you said before closing the door behind you. The apartment fell into a silence that seeped into his head. 

Don sat back down and stared into the dark. 

#don eppes x reader #numb3rs #numb3rs imagine #don eppes #charlie eppes #rob morrow #david krumholtz #megan reeves #crime drama imagines

[horrorslu7]

Karma is my boyfriend.

Summary: Your ex boyfriend was always very controlling, mean, and just plain toxic towards you, thankfully you got out of that relationship and started dating Corey who was way nicer to you and was a very devoted lover. Unfortunately ghosts from your past haunted you but karma was always on your side.

Pairing: (Post-Michael) Corey Cunningham x fem!reader.

Trigger warnings: Murder, past toxic relationship mentions.

You weren't always lucky with your partners. I mean luckily now you had Corey, he might be a bit hot-headed, possessive and such but he was never mean to you.

Sure you had some arguments here and there, like every other couple, but he was never hostile to you, he has never screamed at you or made you feel bad about yourself.

Quite the opposite actually, your past relationship was toxic and your ex had made it his goal in life to make your life miserable and to ruin your self-esteem, the relationship ended a year ago and you decided to move but that wasn't the kind of damage that can be repaired quickly.

And yes, a year is quite a long time, but not long enough to fix your self-esteem completely or your trust in people and yourself. Having a boyfriend doesn't magically solve those problems no matter how amazing he is, but it does help when he's supportive.

And Corey was a very supportive boyfriend, not only supportive, he was a devoted boyfriend. There's nothing he wouldn't do for you and he made sure you knew that.

Time and support helped you realize how amazing you were, and how you didn't deserve to take any abuse from anyone no matter what.

It was quite a surprise when a friday afternoon like any other, you and Corey went to the supermarket to pick some things up for dinner and after paying and leaving, you ran into your pathetic looking ex boyfriend in the parking lot.

He wasted no time to approach you, almost as if he was waiting for you, he immediately started to tell you "how surprised he was to see you doing so good, even tho you were dating the towns weirdo".

That was enough for you to slap him as hard as you could just before telling him to fuck off and get away from you. Corey was surprised and also very proud.

But Corey was also very angry at your ex for even showing up, who does he think he is trying to come after you? He had his chance and wasted it, he hurt you and the memories of the things he has said and done to you haunted you to this day.

In Corey's eyes, your ex didn't even deserve to breath the same air as you, and he would make sure your ex won't do so ever again.

Once you two made it home safe, Corey put the groceries away and then went to sit with you at the couch.

"Are you okay? Do you wanna talk about it?" He said with a comforting tone putting his hand on your back and caressing it.

"Its fine, I'm just..." You started to answer and paused halfway trough to sort out your thoughts. "I didn't expect him to come back, how did he know where to find me and what does he want?"

"I don't know the answer to any of those questions but I promise that he won't hurt you ever again." Corey said putting his hands on your shoulders and then pulling you in for a hug as he started to plan what he will do to that waste of a human that was your ex.

You smiled with your head on his chest and pulled apart only to kiss him, he gladly kissed back and after a few minutes you two broke apart.

"I'm gonna go get dinner started okay?" You said looking at him with a smiled while holding his hand.

He nodded and kissed your forehead, after you went into the kitchen he went to your shared bedroom and changed into much older and used clothes. He didn't want to get his usual clothes dirty with that pig's blood.

After changing he went to the kitchen and told you his step-father texted and asked him if he could go help him out with an important last minute job and that he would be back before dinner was ready. You nodded and told him to go. He told you to call him right away if anything happened.

Corey got on his motorcycle and started driving around, honestly he had no idea where you ex could be but luckily he found him.

Your ex was in a dark and abandoned alley next to a nightclub with poor security if any. Corey got off his bike with a hand on his pocket where he had a knife.

"And what are you doing here? Kids preschool is on the other side of town and is closed by now, champ." He said trying to push Corey's buttons.

Which he didn't need to, Corey already hated him. "Very funny." Corey answered with a blank expression.

"I see her taste became worse after me." Your ex said and proceeded to laugh closing his eyes throwing his head back, Corey took the opportunity to take the pocket knife out and stab him on the neck.

He fell to the ground with a shocked, desperate and scared look on his eyes, trying to scream for help. But instead of his voice, only blood came out.

Corey got on top him and stabbed him again repeatedly. "I don't know why you came here, but that was the last time you will ever bother her again." He said with an agitated voice.

After he made sure your ex died he got up and took off his jacket and then shirt, thankfully the jacket didn't get too dirty, the blood stains were barely noticeable. He took off his shirt and put it on inside out so you wouldn't see the blood and then put on the jacket.

Before heading home, he stopped at the gas station, went to the bathroom to wash his bloodstained hands and then bought your favorite ice-cream.

"I'm back!" He said with a cheerful tone and went into the kitchen where you were finishing dinner. "I bought dessert." He said after kissing you.

"Really!? My favorite!?" You said excited after seeing the ice-cream and hugged him. He giggled and hugged you back just to put the ice-cream away after.

"I will go take a shower before dinner is ready okay? Do you need help with anything? " He asked.

"No, it's fine, go take a shower." You answered with a warm smile.

Usually the metallic smell was normal when Corey came back from work, tonight seemed a little different but you tried to brush it off. I mean what else could your lovely and caring boyfriend be doing at this time of the night?

#corey cunningham x reader #corey cunningham #corey cunningham x you #halloween ends #inspired by the song karma by taylor swift

[whoevenknowswhatimwriting]

Chapter Three's out! Remember to check trigger warnings (although that's less of a problem with this one imo)

Dare set his knife down, careful not to touch the blade, though comforted somewhat by it being made of stone inlaid in the hilt, not iron. It was safer.

He was alone then, since Amon had left a few minutes ago, planning to corral Kaya and Kaz into somewhere they could eat.

Dinner had been a process, and a longer one than Dare would have expected. Peel and cut vegetables, add them to a pot full of stock, and let them cook into a soup. No meat, which he found strange, but there was a loaf of bread to cut and toast. He had no idea where they got it from, since it looked generally fresh and they didn’t have any way to make it.

It felt good, to have something there that he had made, even if he’d just helped. And it was going to be eaten. So it wouldn’t be there for much longer.

But either way, he could do it again. And he probably would.

Dare had decided that he liked cooking. It was simple. He was in control. It was right. He was safe.

And the knife that sat across from him was stone.

Amon knocked quietly at the door, then ducked his head inside.

“I’ve successfully wrangled my sister, and am in the process of luring Kaz out of its workroom. It keeps almost all of the light out of there, I have no idea how it sees. It says to tell you it’s almost done.”

“Thank you. I think the food’s ready.”

“Should be. You want to help bring it in? I can give you directions, and take a second trip for whatever you leave behind.”

“Okay. I can handle the cauldron.”

“You sure? It’s heavy, I can take it. It always seems like it’ll be fine until you’re halfway there and can’t set it down without spilling.”

Dare shook his head. “I can do it. I’m stronger than I look.”

“Alright. Don’t hurt yourself, lift with your legs, not with your back, and all of that.”

“I’ll be fine.”

“Sure. Should be the last tent on the right, table’s at about waist height so don’t let the cauldron drop below there. It’s awful lifting it back up. I’ll go check in on Kaz again, since it’d burn the midnight oil eternally if it needed light to see. I might need to help out a bit to convince it to exit its doom cave.”

“Thank you.”

“Don’t thank me, you’re helping. See you in a bit.”

Dare had her hands full. Literally. The good news was, they were full of the stew cauldron, and it was a perfectly manageable weight, at least for her.

She eased it down gently, careful not to spill, and leaned against the table.

Kaya was sitting at the table, legs crossed and feet up on the chair next to her, arm slung around the back.

“Is there anything you need me to do? I’ve already got dishes set out, so there’s that, but I’m here to help if you want.”

Dare blinked quickly, then shook her head.

“Okay, well, tell me if you change your mind.”

She turned around, sliding her arm off the back of the chair and her gaze to Dare’s. She paused for a moment, exhaled deeply, and started talking.

“So, have you thought much about whether you want to stay here? Obviously you’re free to go, but if you want to stick around, we’d be happy to have you as a friend and not just a visitor.”

Dare didn’t respond, didn’t know if she should. Instead, she stared at her hands, arms suddenly holding her steady, propping up a wooden statue of a person with termites in her veins and rotting organs turning to mulch.

“I… uh, I’m sorry, I…”

Don’t cry, please, please, don’t cry, hold it together, you can’t fall apart at the first kind thing someone says. 

Kaya was standing then, blurry and wavering in Dare’s glazed eyes, but with clear concern etched into her face. She reached out a hand, but pulled back before actually touching Dare, fingers hovering by her shoulder like an open door. 

Dare folded into herself, arms crossing over her chest and knuckles white and clenched around her biceps. Hold yourself together, that’s it.

The next time Kaya stretched her hand towards Dare, palm up like an invitation, she leaned into it, practically collapsing against her into a tight hug. She tucked her head down and felt fingers reach up to the base of her skull, almost catching on the chain in her left ear.

“Hey, love, it’s okay, you’ll be fine. Is something wrong?”

Dare felt like she might rip apart, because nothing was wrong, but here she was. Breaking down, like she’d always felt just on the verge of. And what was worse was that it felt good to be able to cry and squeeze her eyes shut and just be held. To be safe enough, to feel safe enough, to do so.

She stood there, still as a stone, for another minute. After that, she pulled away, wiped her eyes, and sat down. 

Back straight, eyes forward, she said, “I don’t know what I’m going to do. But I know I want to stay.”

#writeblr #writing #writer stuff #writing community #writers on tumblr #writers and poets #writerscommunity #my ocs #ocs #original character #tw: sharp objects #tw: trust issues #tw: trauma #tw: distress

[nicoline1998enilocin]

Yours, Forever | Chapter 7

PAIRING | Bucky Barnes x Female!Reader

WORD COUNT | 3.1K

SUMMARY | After three months in Italy, Y/N was finally back home in New York, but things don't go according to plan. When Bucky comes back from a particularly bad mission, he is avoiding anything and everyone, until he gets pushed to his breaking point and Y/N has to pay the price for his mistake.

WARNING(S) | This is your official trigger warning. Do not proceed if any of these topics upset you. Swearing, violence (choking), mental health struggles.

A/N | Hi everyone, thank you so much for reading my first ever fic! I would like to start off by saying that English isn’t my first language (I’m Dutch after all 😉) so every mistake you find – spelling or otherwise – is completely my own. I would appreciate you spreading the love about this fic, and I ofcourse hope you enjoy reading it as much as I enjoyed writing it!

Likes and reblogs will be very much appreciated 💜

Main Masterlist | Bucky Barnes Masterlist | Series masterlist | Chapter 6 | Chapter 8

The last day of the Italy trip had arrived, and both Y/N and Eve were sad to see their 3 month vacation come to an end, seeing how much fun they had. Once they are at the airport, they have to say goodbye again and it is just as painful as the first time when Y/N left to move to New York. After they said their goodbyes they each went to their respective gates, and waited for their planes to leave. Eve had a short flight ahead, but Y/N knew she was in for a long one and couldn't wait to see Bucky again, to cuddle him for as long as they possibly could, to kiss his perfect lips again until they can't think straight anymore. The flight goes without problems and little turbulence, and she even manages to finish 2 books she had downloaded onto her Kindle, so she made a mental note to update her reading goal of this year.

She got off the plane and texted her dad she arrived safe and would come see him later when she had the chance, she had a lot to catch up on with him, and ofcourse a lot of photos to to show him as well. Once she found her suitcases she moved into the arrival hall with a huge smile on her face, in the hopes to see her boyfriend again, but it dropped as soon as she saw Steve, not Bucky. ''Well, I'm happy to see you too!'' Steve said joking as he came up to her with his arms spread so he could take her in his arms and give him one of the bear hugs she loved so much. ''Sorry, I was expecting Bucky, he said he would be here, that's all. But I'm happy to see you too, you know that right?!'' she said, and looked behind Steve expectingly, to see who we was talking to earlier.

''Didn't know you needed a babysitter to get out of the compound, Rogers!'' Y/N joked when she looked at the man behind him, walking up to him with her hand stretched out. ''Hi, I'm Y/N, I'll be Steve's colleague soon when I start working for S.I. and Tony.'' she introduced herself. ''Uh, hi! I'm Lucas, Steve is my-'' ''Friend! He's just my friend.'' Steve quickly said, he didn't want anyone to know he has a boyfriend yet, since they only started dating a few weeks ago. And after all, he only came with him because he had no other choice, since Bucky mentioned last minute he was supposed to pick her up at the airport and they were in the middle of a date. ''Well, it's nice to meet you, Lucas!'' but Y/N already put 2 and 2 together that they were together. The crimson color on Steve's cheeks didn't make it hard to guess.

''Steve, why is Bucky not here? He specifically told me he would be the one picking me up today...'' she asked, not really sure if she wanted to know the answer. ''The team got called out on a last minute mission for a few days, so he asked my to pick you up since I'm still not cleared for field work yet.'' he explained. Both Lucas and Steve took one of Y/N's suitcases after some protest, but they insisted so she just went with it. Once they were almost at the car, Y/N said ''it's okay if you sit in the front Lucas, my legs aren't as long as yours anyway so you could use the leg room.'' with a knowing wink to Steve, and he felt a little relieved when he saw that. They got in the front and he immediately put his hand on Lucas' thigh as he drove them home, and Y/N couldn't be happier for him, he deserves it. The ride was silent, but she didn't mind after such a long flight, she couldn't wait to see her bed again.

Steve drove them to the Avengers Compound like Tony had asked, so she could sleep at his place and be there with Pepper, that way she didn't have to be alone on the first few nights back. ''Hey Pepper, how is my favorite momma to be doing today?'' she said and smiled at her when she saw her round belly again. ''Actually, you're just on time, she just kicked again for the first time in a few days, and you'll be the first to feel it, even before Tony!'' she beamed at her, and put Y/N's hand on the place where she could feel the baby kick. It was such an amazing feeling, and Y/N honestly couldn't wait to experience a life growing inside of herself one day. It would never cease to amaze her what the human body was capable of.

''My god, this feels amazing. Does Tony know she kicked at all, or are you going to wait to tell him?'' ''He does know she kicked already, and told me specifically not to let anyone feel the kicks before he got the chance, but I just can't say no to you!'' Pepper laughed, making the baby kick again. The two ladies get comfortable on the couch, Pepper with a glass of water and Y/N with a glass of white wine, she felt like she deserved one after the trip she just had. ''I have to tell you something, but you can't tell anyone! Steve just picked me up from the airport and apparently he has a boyfriend! He came along, but the weird thing is that when he wanted to introduce himself as Steve's boyfriend, Steve quickly said he's his friend...'' It's a good thing she knows him by now and she knows Pepper won't tell anyone, but Y/N really had to tell someone.

A few days later, the entire team comes back from their mission, and Steve and Y/N decided to wait for them in the hangar where the Quinjet would land, so they could both welcome them home. They landed it safely and as soon as the ramp opened, everyone came running towards Y/N for the hugs they so desperately needed and she was so willing to give to them now. Everyone, except the person she wanted to see the most, Bucky. He didn't even look at them but instead just walked straight into the Compound without saying a word. ''Sam? What's going on with Bucky?'' she asked carefully, but she felt a stinging sensation in her chest because he didn't even care enough to look at her. ''I don't know, he was the same as always when you're not there. He was still this staring machine we all know and love.'' he said, but his brows were furrowed in worry now. This wasn't like Bucky, and all of them were wondering what was going on.

The next week doesn't change anything, Bucky just keeps himself locked in his room, this mission hit him harder than he thought it would, he should've just listened to Tony and stayed home. He knew this was gonna be a hard mission with his past with HYDRA, but he didn't want to admit it. And now he is locked in his own room, not willing to come out for anything or anyone, just alone with his own thoughts and nightmares. With the flashbacks that have taken him over completely. He doesn't notice when he gets texts or calls, he doesn't answer the door when someone is there. Not when Steve knocked, not when Y/N was there to talk to him. He didn't care about anything else, he just wanted all the thoughts and nightmares to stop. He wanted to stop crying but he couldn't, this mission had proven to be too much for Bucky.

After yet another week, Y/N comes up to his door and bangs on it, hard. She can't take it anymore and demands to be let into his room, this isn't healthy she says. ''Bucky, please. This isn't good for you, and we miss you man. Hell, I miss you the most. I just wanna see my boyfriend, I wanna be there for you. WHY DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND I JUST WANNA HELP? Why doesn't that get through your thick skull?!'' she said, and that was a step too far for Bucky. He stormed out of his room and grabbed Y/N at her throat with his vibranium hand, squeezing harder than he intended but he just wanted her to stop talking. Steve and Tony heard something and came running into the hallway and went for Bucky and Y/N when they saw what was happening.

''BUCKY, WHAT THE FUCK! YOU'RE FUCKING HURTING HER!'' Steve yelled when he pulled Bucky off of Y/N with a firm tug, and they both fell back into his room. She collapsed onto her knees and tried to crawl away from him when Tony picked her up. ''It's okay honey, you're okay now. I won't let him hurt you, don't you worry about that.'' he said softly, reassuring her while trying to sooth her when she's crying and struggling to breathe. ''I'll take her to the medbay, please make sure he doesn't go anywhere near her Rogers!'' Tony said while rushing her off to see Bruce. When he was looking over Y/N Tony was calling Pepper and telling her what happened, saying that Y/N would be staying with them for a while longer, because he doesn't trust her anywhere around the Compound by herself right now.

As soon as Bucky pushed her against the wall, he immediately regretted his action, but his brain short circuited and he couldn't let go of Y/N. He had a release for his pent up anger, and was glad when Steve pulled him off of her, because God knows he couldn't have done it himself. He cried for hours and hours afterwards, not being able to comprehend the fact that he took his anger out on his perfect girlfriend. Although, he wasn't sure that's what he could call her now. Not after what he just did, and he couldn't wrap his head around why. He fucked up the one good thing in his life he had going for him since escaping HYDRA, since being back from Wakanda and having the Winter Soldier erased from him. But deep down he knew he would always be there, and this proved just that. He knew he didn't deserve her, but this is something he never meant to do. When he opened his bedroom door to go to the gym to get his anger out, he saw something silver shining on the floor. Y/N's necklace, he accidentally ripped it off her neck.

Bruce decided it would be the best to keep Y/N sedated for a little bit, in order for the pain medication to do it's work and for her to be able to breathe a little bit without pain. There are deep purple marks around her neck, wrapping almost all the way around, and she had a nasty head wound from where Bucky pushed her hard into the wall. ''I just don't fucking get why he would hurt her like that. She doesn't deserve this.'' Tony said to her dad, who he called too. He knew that the only other person she would want to have there, is her dad. ''Hey sunshine, it's dad. I'm not sure you can hear me, but I want you to know that I love you, so incredibly much. Tony called and I dropped everything, I literally dropped the apple pie I was making,'' he said laughing through his tears. ''You're safe now sunshine, everything is going to be okay.'' he said before he couldn't hold himself together any longer and started sobbing with his head on her hand, which he was holding with both hands.

When Y/N woke up, her dad and Tony were there, and she was happy to see the both of them, but at the same time she was in a lot of pain as well. ''Hey sunshine, it's okay. You don't have to talk, I know it hurts.'' her dad said with a soothing voice as he looked up to her. ''I have talked it over with Tony and we decided it is smart if you live with him and Pepper for a little while, so you can get back in the rhythm of work again once you're ready.'' and all she could do was give a small nod. ''I already got some of your clothes there, and some of your personal belongings like your laptop, iPad, some of your favorite books and a few photos, so you can make it a bit more like home.'' he said. Her dad gave her a kiss on her forehead and with a last 'I love you sunshine' he walked out the door and went back to the bakery, his heart feeling heavy in his chest.

It took about a week for Y/N to fully be settled into Tony and Pepper's house, which she would call home for the foreseeable future. She slowly got back into work, for now just working a few hours a day from home with Tony. The two of them took great care of her, and her dad visited most nights of the week after work. ''Hey sunshine, I'm happy to see you again!'' he said, and he was earlier than expected so he could join them for dinner. ''Hi dad.'' she said in a soft voice and a little smile. It broke his heart to see his little girl like this, but he's eternally grateful she's still alive, he even brought her favorite treat for dessert, his chocolate and caramel brownies.

After two weeks at their house, Y/N got a little restless and wanted to go back to the office again, even if it was just as an excuse to get out of the house. She didn't really want to see anybody there, the only one she could stand to see was Tony, and maybe Steve, but not the rest of them. When they get called in for an emergency meeting by Fury, they don't have a choice but to go. Tony doesn't want to leave Y/N alone, so she comes too. They walk into the conference room and to Y/N's delight, it's only Fury there. ''Hi Nick, how are you?'' she asks softly, and he can't believe what he's seeing. ''What the fuck happened here Y/N? You know I don't like my favorite person hurt like that?!'' Fury said, and Y/N couldn't help but smile when he said that. She loves the fact that a tough guy like Fury has such a soft spot for her. ''It's nothing, Nick. I'm fine now. It's just the bruising that has to go down, but it doesn't hurt anymore.''

''Fine? That doesn't look 'fine' to me. Who did this to you? Because I will personally and the motherfucker responsible for hurting you.'' Fury growled. ''Please don't, it has been handled. I promise!'' Y/N exclaimed, even though Bucky hurt her, he doesn't want any of that to happen to him. She feels like she deserved it, she had pushed him past his limit anyway. He didn't want to see her, and she shouldn't have bothered him. ''How is everything going at S.H.I.E.L.D.?'' Y/N asked, trying to change the topic, because she was not really comfortable talking about it. ''As long as everything still goes to shit I still have a job, so can't complain.'' he said, and he touched her arm with a soft, reassuring squeeze, letting her know he was on her side.

Slowly the Avengers walked into the room, and they were relieved when they saw Y/N was there, but they were worried that she wasn't her normal, cheerful self. Even though everyone knew what happened, nobody mentioned it, most of them just said hi or waved at her, until Steve came in. He walked straight up to her, asking for a hug. ''Is it okay if I hug you, Y/N? I just need to make sure you're still okay.'' and she agreed reluctantly. She wasn't in a hugging mood, but she didn't want to say no to Steve. Even though she didn't really hug him back, he still said how happy he was to see she was okay, before letting her go. Bucky walked into the room last, still looking a lot worse for wear, and Y/N immediately flinched at the look of him and went to stand behind Steve. ''It's okay, he won't hurt you again,'' Steve reassured her, keeping both his hands on her behind has back.

The moment Bucky walks into the conference room, he notices all eyes were looking to the front of the room, where he saw Y/N. They made eye contact and she flinched and quickly hid behind Steve when she saw him. He couldn't believe that he did that to her, he saw the purple handprint around her neck and his eyes were filled with regret. He sat down at the far end of the table and the briefing started, but all he noticed was Y/N, and the tears streaming down her face while Tony held her close and rubbed her back soothingly. He should be the one soothing her, not Tony. But he fucked that up when he attacked her, when he almost choked the life out of his precious doll. When the briefing was over, everyone slowly left the conference room, but Bucky stayed behind. ''Doll, can I just talk to you for a minute? I want to tell you how sorry-'' he started, but quickly got cut off by Tony.

''You don't get to call her doll anymore. You lost any and all privilege of that when you decided to hurt the one person who cared more for you than you could even imagine. When you hurt the woman who loved, hell, still loves you more than anything, but you had to go and fuck that up, didn't you? Because for some fucking reason, you can't see a good thing when it's right in front of you!'' Tony said, and Bucky got mad at him. ''You don't get to talk to me like that Stark. I would choose your next words carefully, or you'll be next.'' Bucky threatened him, and in his anger he punched the wall with his vibranium arm. This made Y/N flinch again and made her cry even harder, letting out long, hard sobs when she was held by Steve, in the safety of his arms. Bucky's gut just got filled with more and more regret when he saw that.

#bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes x y/n #bucky fanfic #bucky x female reader #bucky x y/n #bucky barnes

[mystic-ocs]

Spin the Bottle

Word Count: 1,039

TW: Underage drinking and kissing, slight misgendering as Zane hadn't come out yet and Yashira refers to them and Atticus as "her boys".

I was working on OC Kiss 2024 when I realized this didn't quite fit the prompt, so I decided to finish it and post it here. Takes place when Yashira was in high school (so ~8 years ago).

Yashira leans against the wall as she sips at the cup of vodka someone had offered her. This party was turning out to be kind of lame, and she almost envies Atticus for skipping it to hang out with Zane instead. She wishes she’d done the same. She considers leaving and doing just that, maybe after sobering up a little since alcohol was a trigger for Zane, but then Rose bounds up to her.

“Shira! Come join us!”

Yashira pulls her arm back. “Join us in what?”

“Spin the bottle.”

She considers going with her initial though of just leaving, but the idea of kissing leading to getting laid makes her second guess that decision. “I guess I could do one round.”

Rose cheers as she leads her over to a circle of people sitting around an empty bottle of alcohol (she isn’t knowledgeable enough yet to tell what kind given the lack of label). “Got one more.”

She can’t help but feel a little resentful when the boys around her cheer, likely expecting an easy lay if they get her. Then again, she’d been thinking about the exact same thing just moments before so can she really judge them all that harshly?

She takes a seat between Rose and a guy she vaguely recognizes as being in the grade below her but can’t remember his name.

At first the game proceeds normally, but after a couple spins and even more alcohol, the kisses start getting more intense. Then it happens.

Yashira reaches out to spin the bottle, looking bored as it spins past the boys to land on… Rose.

Somehow that was the first same sex kiss that had come up, and Yashira’s only mildly surprised that it would happen to her. “Well. Uh…”

Rose shrugs despite the cheering around them. “You can spin again if you like.”

“Nooo,” someone slurs. “No one else got a respin.” This naturally leads into people cheering “Kiss her. Kiss her.”

Yashira shrugs. “I guess I can try anything once.” She crawls closer to Rose. “If you’re okay with it, I mean.” She knew Rose was an out lesbian, but she wasn’t sure how the other girl would feel about being used as an experiment.

“Shira, baby, you’re too hot to say no to.”

Yasihra laughs. “Fair enough.”

She cups Rose’s neck and pulls her closer, ignoring the drunken cheers that erupt around her as she kisses her.

To her surprise, the kiss isn’t as unpleasant as she would’ve imagined. It was warm and dry (unlike some of the guys she’d kissed) and Rose’s lips were softer than anyone she’d ever kissed before. It was… interesting.

She feels Rose’s tongue trail along her lower lip and opens her mouth, eager for more. She can’t remember the last time kissing a guy had felt this good. If it ever had. Did this make her a lesbian?

She eventually pulls away when the need to breathe gets too great. Rose beams at her. “Now, I get to say I’ve kissed the hottest girl at school,” she jokes.

Yashira laughs. “That’s not as big of an honor as you seem to think it is.” She’d kissed a lot of boys before, after all.

“Ah, but how many girls can say they’ve had the honor?”

Yashira tilts her head. “Fair enough.”

A few minutes later, Rose gets up to get more to drink and Yashira follows her. “Sooo… about that kiss before.”

Rose grabs a beer from the fridge. “Sorry if I made you uncomfortable. I might’ve gotten a little carried away. I just… you’re so-”

Yashira interrupts her, “I wasn’t uncomfortable. I actually, uh,” she looks around anxiously. “It was… nice. I was… I was kinda wondering if you’d like to do it again.”

Rose blinks. “Excuse a what now?”

“Would you like to do it again?” Yashira asks, now feeling self-conscious.

Rose continues to stare. “I’m dreaming, right?”

Yashira reaches out to pinch her, chuckling when Rose yelps. “Nope.”

“Then hell yes.” Yashira would later find out that Rose had had a crush on her since the moment Atticus introduced them. 

“Are you sure it’s okay though? This… I’m not sure I’m gay. I just-”

“Want to experiment?” Rose finishes for her. Yashira nods. “Yeah. I… I normally wouldn’t be, but it’s you. And we’re friends. I think?”

“Of course.” She wasn’t as close to Rose as she was to Atticus and Zane, but there were very few people she liked as much as she liked as much as her boys.

“Then yeah. It’s cool.”

“Cool.”

Yashira grabs Rose’s wrist and leads her up to one of the empty rooms around the house where the party was being held. “So I don’t know how lesbian sex works, so I’d rather just stick to making out.”

Rose chuckles. If she can tell Yashira is nervous, she doesn’t comment. “Fine by me.”

Yashira nods. “Right.”

Rose settles on the bed and pats the space beside her. “Come sit.” Yashira obeys. “You were so confident about kissing me earlier,” she teases.

Yashira snorts. “Earlier I wasn’t questioning my sexuality.”

“I imagine it’s not much different from kissing a boy,” Rose comments. “Just with more boobs.”

Rose nestles up against Yashira, putting an arm around her waist as they lay down. “Just relax. I’d say pretend you’re kissing a boy, but that might defeat the purpose.”

Before Yashira has a chance to answer, Rose leans in and kisses her again, immediately working to deepen the kiss, which Yashira allows. 

At first, it continues to have that weird feeling that she’d gotten earlier, but as time goes by, it becomes easier. After a couple kisses, it becomes clear what part of the problem is. She’s never been the submissive in a role before, and she’s not about to start now.

She hooks a leg over Rose’s and flips them so she’s on top. Rose gasps, bucking against her in her surprise. “S-sorry,” Rose stammers. “I-you-that… fuck, that was hot.”

Yashira chuckles. “It’s fine. No sex, but everything else is fine.”

Rose nods. “Right. Yes. Good. More kissing?”

“Yes, please.”

Rose entwines her fingers in Yashira’s hair, tugging her down back to her level and kissing her once more.

#Yashira #oc writing #writing

[loserchildhotpants]

October is a minefield of triggers for me, so I generally float through it, derealized and violently numb, with random lightning strikes of paralyzing anxiety, and that's just... normal. For me. I don't expect anything less.

I didn't hear from any of my family on my anniversary. It was a big one - Nathan and I have been married for a decade now. I was strong-armed into a wedding, I didn't want one, I wasn't comfortable performing socially like that at 19 for people I barely spoke to, that barely knew me, but my mother steamrolled past me like she always does, and I hate memories of my wedding.

I hope to have a re-do sometime, if/when there's ever expendable income again.

Anyway, I wasn't even taking it that hard. My sister sent a gift a few days beforehand, my MIL called the day of, and that was the extent of what I heard from relatives/loved ones.

Then my Aunt texts me a few days after the anniversary w lots of photos of my cousin proposing to his gf and the blow out engagement party they're throwing right now - pictures of the dessert table with homemade, personalized goodies, and balloons, and all sorts of feel-good, celebratory stuff.

It's a group chat, so it's actually my sister that mentions to my Aunt that my 10 wedding anniversary just passed - I could feel my sister's frustration. I was belatedly congratulated, and then the acknowledgment of my impending birthday was brought up, and I explained I'll be turning 30 - this also came as a shock, and that Nathan and I just bought our first home 2 months ago also comes as a shock.

Whatever. My Aunt couldn't have known that any of that would be hurtful, and it's not her fault that my parents are just absent and deeply ambivalent about me.

The next day, I wake up to texts from both my parents (neither of which speak to me at all, really, so it's always jarring to see a notification from one or the other, nevermind both at the same time), and my mother is telling me to call her, and my father is demanding to know about my moving, demanding my new address.

With my father, I could tell he was embarrassed, and so probably angry. I brought up the fact that he'd spoken to me two or three times in the months before I moved, wherein I told him about the home buying process, and around what time we'd be moving -- we were in contact because he needed me to sign stuff for his last will and testament.

He knew I was moving, he knew I was buying my first home, he just didn't care enough to remember, and then is angry with me that his sister is like 'why didn't you mention Melanie bought a house??' and got caught not giving a shit. I sent him my new address, and he deigned to finally passive aggressively reply to me with a 'thanks for the update' the following day.

As for my mother, she was calling to ask how old I was turning. She flew right past my missed anniversary - again, which was HER making - and I wouldn't be mad, I really wouldn't, if it had been MY wedding. It wasn't, though - it was HER fun party, and it's pretty fucking insulting to have even her forget about it. She has a lukewarm reaction of surprise to my being married a decade, gives a half-assed 'congrats' and then asks about my birthday.

As is typical for her, she has nothing kind to say about me, nothing about being proud or interested in my plans or anything, just wants to know if she can send money for a dinner and spent 10 minutes complaining about how this makes her so old.

When she asked how she was supposed to remember my wedding anniversary, I brought up that she was the one that planned it and set the date ? That didn't evoke anything, and when I told her the date, thinking she'd put it in her calendar or something, she was like, 'oh, that's the same day as [my renter's] birthday! It'll be easy to remember now!'

And I almost just... hung up. Astonishing to me, truly, that that's where I'm at on her scale of significance.

To be honest, I don't want attention from my parents on my birthday. In fact, I really wish they'd be consistent for fucking ONCE in my life and just fuck off for all of October the way they do for every other month of my life.

They don't talk to me, they don't provide anything, they're critical, judgmental, and mean, and I limit my contact with them so that I don't drive myself to further illness.

I just wish they'd stay away. I prefer the silence. They don't care and I know they don't, and I don't have to see and hear about how much they don't care, until it's October, arguably the hardest time of year for me, and then they have to find ways to jumpscare me and complain about how my existence is somehow inconvenient for them.

Like, I know. You've let me know my entire life how inconvenient I am for you. That's why we don't talk. Can you fuck off again now? Why are you here??

It feels like being bombarded with extended family information and then immediate family interactions shoved me from 'gently dissociative,' to 'violently derealized,' and I've never been able to pull myself out of derealization.

So nothing is real, and nothing matters, and neither do I, and I'm turning 30 on Monday, but that's not real, and talking is so much effort -- making words is so much effort, and they don't matter, the noise isn't even real, I'm just shoving air into difficult shapes when I could be sitting in silence and decomposing much more peacefully.

There isn't a point to this, really. I don't feel anything. I mean, I feel things, but like, several degrees away from myself.

I really want to be happy, and to feel happy, not just to objectively understand I'm experiencing happiness, but to feel it. And that's... I dunno. A mountain on the horizon that gets smaller in the distance the more I hike towards it.

It's really difficult to see my Aunt being a Mom for her kids, being present and happy for them, doing stuff that makes them happy, being involved -- it's hard to watch anyone else experience maternal and/or paternal warmth and pride that I'm constantly denied.

It's really hard to have both my living parents effectively orphan me because I am at once too much and too little.

I lie awake at night going 'what's so wrong with me? What'd I do wrong?' -- I'm turning 30, and I'm still up at night, going 'why doesn't my dad like me? Why does my mom make me feel badly about myself on purpose? How can I change to make them proud? To make them love me?'

And the answer is that I can't do anything, they won't change, nothing I ever do is going to be good enough, they're both self-obsessed, emotionally immature people with varying degrees of personality disorders they refuse to acknowledge, much less work on, and academically understanding that does not, in fact, silence the lonely, crying child inside me.

#personal #melanie lives #long post #im really fuckin tired #is tired an emotion?

[drawing-way-outside-the-lines]

➖ Mature content, 18+ ➖ check the trigger tags each time ➖      

Chapter 8 - Runaway. Episode 2.

Evan: *With teary eyes I read the sms from my sister, she had found Andy, he was okay, and she told me where they were. A place I had visited with Andy not so long ago. Why didnt I think to go there yet? I had just assumed he was in town, not in the outer part of it. I quickly sms'ed her back, just a quick 'stall him, I will be there in 10!' and as I slid the phone back down my pocket, I leaned against my bike as the sobbing emmerged from deep inside me. 5 minutes later when I was all cried out, I got back on my bike, dried my eyes and set in the direction of where Lily and Andy were located.* Andy: *He looked up at me with red puffy eyes as I walked towards him and Lily, they were sitting next to each other in the tall grass, he didn't say anything, he just half smiled apologizing, although I didnt think he had anything to apologize for. I slowly sat down next to him, observing him for a short while, to see if he had any bruises or cuts, and finally he spoke, soft and hoarse, it was easy to tell he had been crying and screaming a lot* I'm okay… you dont have to look at me like that. I didn't do anything stupid, and I didnt touch alcohol or any other shit like that. I'm dealing. *He blew a bit of extra air out his nose in a laughing manner and lit a cig* Lily was good company *he winked at her as she smiled to him.* Lily: I tried my best *Her voice was as always calm and caring, and she chuckled softly as she tussled his mohawk, making it messy and even more sexy than normally, which made it hard for me not to smile. She had arrived few days before, to make me aware she had digested me being in a gay relationship, and she was okay with it. And as she said 'now we just wait for the rest of the family to follow'. I had smiled and nodded, but in my heart I knew that wouldn't happen any day soon.* Andy: *He leaned his head on my shoulder, and wrapped an arm around my arm closest to him* I missed you.. Evan: *I gently kissed his hair, sniffing him in as my nose got burried in the now black mohawk, whatching the gentle blue shine in it, which the moon so beautifully played with. It was a great color for him, and although he had only had it a few days, I had already gotten used to it. But that didn't mean I didnt miss his electric blue hair he had had since New Years* Andy: What are you thinking of? *He suddenly looked up at me curiously* Evan: *I chuckled silently* You. As always. Andy: *He chuckled softly and I couldn't help but notice my sister was smiling as if she was watching two puppies playing. Which naturally made me blush, and in return she only smiled even more. And if that wasn't enough, Andy noticed it, grabbed my chin and leaned up to me to plant a soft kiss on my lips, almost whispering as he spoke again* I'm sorry I scared you. Have you been crying? *He tilted his head and looked concerned, then sighed deeply and pressed his hair against my chest, grabbing on to my half open black blazer jacket* I'm so sorry, I just needed to get away, I felt like I was going to explode. It's hard to explain. I felt something inside me I hadn't felt for a while. And I didn't know how that would turn out, so I had to get away from everybody. Evan: *I frowned a bit and looked questioning at my sister, but she only shook her head in return, indicating she didn't know what was going on* Andy: *He let go of my jacket again, and twirled a finger around a strand of my hair* so what did you think about me? Evan: *I chuckled softly, this was one of the moments where he was almost like a child, so soft, so innocent, so pure. I couldn't help but love him a little bit more, wanting to take him in my arms and protect him from the world. I smiled softly and brushed a strand of the mohawk away from his forehead, speaking in a lowered warm voice* I was thinking how proud I am of you. That you didn't hurt yourself, or anything else along that line. Andy: *He nodded softly* I'm trying to do better. Evan: *I smiled softly in return and planted a gently kiss on his forehead* I know you do.

#unicornmanes #Evan Thompson #Andy Shaw-Thompson #Andycorn #Lily Ophelia Thompson