#anyway I moved out of my uni room today and a year ago when I moved IN me and my mum rowed the entire time | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

mountttmase · 1 month

Note

And there it is😌🩷

Waking up next to Mason was your favourite thing in the world. Today though, you weren’t afforded that luxury. POOR GIRLY WOKE UP WITHOUT HER HUBBY

Mason was up earlier than you anticipated but after another night of him worshipping your body, you didn’t even wake up fully as he moved around. Ever since your wedding a month ago he was even more touchy than usual but you weren't complaining about any of it as you wanted him just as much. However this morning you needed to recover from the way he’d put you to the test last night knowing you wouldn't see each other for a few days and you ached deliciously. EHEHEHHEHEHE GIGGLING🤭🤭🤭🤭 NAUGHTIES

THE LETTER DIDN'T FAIL TO MELT ME EVEN IF I'VE ALREADY SEEN IT BEFORE

You had some errands to run today, but you didn’t want to leave without finding at least one more. Thankfully the next one wasn’t hard to find and as you made your way into the dining room the bright bunch of flowers sitting in the middle of the table caught your eye immediately. FLOWERSSSSS🤭🌸🌸

OMG THOSE FLOWERS ARE SO PRETTY 😭

THE TEXTS😭🫠

I WANT TO GO THERE AND HELP HER WITH PAINTING 😂 NEED SOME RELAXING ACTIVITIES

As you pulled apart the frame, you realised it had two sides, one containing a photo for yours and Mason's wedding day whilst the other seemed to have dried flowers from your bouquet pressed between the glass. I'LL CRY

PLEASE DON'T CRY MRS MOUNT😭😭😭😭

The next note was staring you in the face. Attached to the back of the door so you’d see it on the way out and you laughed as you popped the box down to read it. HIM KNOWING EXACTLY WHERE SHE WAS GOING TO BE IN THE HOUSE

You’d known Seb since you were babies. Your mums being best friends that had magically gotten pregnant at the same time and whilst you weren’t as close as you once were, he was like family and you had a permanent invite to any party he threw in order for you not to rat him out to his mum. SAM, WE LOVE YOU

Logan was in the year above, a popular guy and way out of your league but you fell for his charms quickly. You never understood why he’d gone for you but he had and the pair of you started dating shortly after you’d met. He was sweet and sensitive and made you feel on top of the world but right now you wished the ground would swallow you up. THERE HE IS, THE PIECE OF SHIT

‘Oh shit! Sorry, are you alright?’ You suddenly heard. Feeling a hand on your arm as the stranger you’d walked straight into tried to steady you and when you looked up you were met with a face you didn’t recognise. HIIIII🤭🤭🤭🤭

‘No it’s okay, I wasn’t either’ he laughed. Scratching the back of his neck nervously and you couldn’t help but find him endearing straight away. ‘You sure you’re alright? Looks like I’ve seen a ghost’ HE ALREADY CAN READ HER PERFECTLY 😭

‘I know I’ve asked, and I know you said you’re fine, but are you sure? You can tell me you know. Nothing like spilling your secrets to a stranger’ HE IS MY FAVOURITE HUMAN

‘What about you, do you still play?’ You asked, hoping if you spoke about him he’d forget to ask about you and thankfully your plan was working. LITTLE GENIUS😂

‘Yeah it’s different, glad to be home though’ he chuckled before bumping his shoulder into yours. ‘Anyway we’re meant to be talking about you, not me. Stop changing the subject’HE KNOWS HER SO WELL EVEN IF HE DOESN'T KNOW A THING ABOUT HER

‘I don’t even know. He’s a year above and already at uni. I thought things were fine but he text me a few months back saying I distracted him too much and he wanted a fresh start from everything, including me, and I haven’t seen or heard from him since’ you shrugged. ‘Like it was so out of the blue but we’d only been together for around six months so i didn't take it too hard but it’s still a bit shit to see him’ HE IS WHAT I LIKE TO CALL A PIECE OF SSSSS 🤭😂

‘I should be getting back out too, but I’ll see you around probably’ NOT HER RUNNING AWAY😂😭

You didn’t get a chance to hit call though, a tall shadow looming over you and when you looked up it was number one on your list of people you didn’t want to be acquainted with. OH NO THERE HE IS😒😒😒

‘Ah there you are’ you suddenly heard. Looking to your left to see Mason walking towards you with two drinks in his hand and a cheeky smile on his face. ‘You left your drink in the other room, gorgeous. I got you a fresh one’ he smiled. Passing you a cup before wrapping his now free arm around your waist and kissing your temple gently. ‘You alright, mate? I’m Mason, y/n’s boyfriend. You are?’ I'M SCREAMINGGGG

THE FACT THAT THEY REALLY SEEMED TOGETHER WHEN THEY TOLD LOGAN HOW THEY MET AND EVERYTHING 🫠

‘What the fuck was that’ you laughed, turning to face him but keeping close so he would keep his arm around you and thankfully he did. KEEPING CLOSEEEE

‘Well lucky for you, I don’t see that as a bad thing’ he winked and you felt your cheeks flush. ‘Unless you want me to piss off?’‘Nah, I think you’ve earned your spot’ you told him, biting your lip cheekily and the way his eyes flashed to your lips made your tummy flutter. OMGGGG I LOVE THEM

Throughout the night you’d ended up practically sat in Mason's lap. His hands rarely leaving your waist as you got to know each other and you didn’t see Logan again that night. Whether that was because he’d left or was just staying out of your way you didn’t know but you were so wrapped up in Mason you didn’t care. I'M SCREAMING, KICKING MY FEET, GIGGLING

You couldn’t get over how gorgeous he was. Big brown eyes and a killer smile but it was his goofy personality and his insistent need to make you laugh that was really winning you over. He was cheeky and silly and the way he kept looking you up and down made you blush. THE PERFECT MAN HONESTLY

‘Mate, I promise you I’m not gonna hurt her. I know we’ve been drinking and stuff but I actually really like her’ he confessed and you felt your tummy flip at his confession. ‘Do you think she’d go on a date with me?’OBVIOUSLYYYYYY

‘You can be y/n’s man of honour’ Mason joked ‘I bet you’d look great in a dress’ SILLYYY

‘Hey girlfriend, I’ve been looking for you’ GIRLFRIEND 🤭

‘Well, funnily enough I have no idea who Kate or Jess are and even if I did I still think I’d have had my eye on you’ he winked and you felt yourself blush as you hid in his shoulder. ‘What? I’m serious’ he laughed, his free hand coming to your thigh so he could lift it over his lap and move you to straddle him. You’d never been in this situation before, alone in a room with a boy you’d only met a few hours prior but you knew you didn’t want to stop so you went with it and placed your arms around his neck as he held you at your waist. HE IS IN LOVE

‘Just for tonight?’ You teased pulling back to look at him and the pretty smile that took over his face made your knees weak. ‘We can extend my contract if you like. Depends if the terms are favourable though’‘How about you take me to that ice cream shop we had our first date at and we can discuss it further’‘Deal’ he breathed, but before you had a second to think he planted his lips on yours. MY BABIES ARE GOING ON A DATEEE

THE KISSED THEY KISSED THEY KISSED THEY KISSEDDDD 🚨🚨🚨

‘I’ve wanted to kiss you all night’ he whispered when you finally broke apart for air, nose bumping into yours gently but you still didn’t have the confidence to look at him properly and kept your eyes planted on his chest. ‘Me too’ you giggled. ‘You know, I’ve never kissed a boy at a party before. Let alone be in a room alone with one’ CAN YOU HEAR ME SCREAMING????

Mason was cut off by the sound of the door opening. The pair of you quickly looking to see who’d interrupted you and to your shock it was Logan. His face bemused as his gaze landed on you and you knew your underwear was on show as your dress had ridden up but Mason was quick to move you to his side so you were shielded from him. OH WHAT A PLEASURE TO SEE YOU IN THIS EXACT MOMENT

It was still bare like all the others but a red box on one of the shelves at the back caught your eye. There shouldn’t have been anything in here so you carefully walked over to reach for it and your suspicions were confirmed when you saw the infamous lined paper neatly folded and taped to the lid of the box. You wanted to read the note first and not ruin what was inside so as carefully as you could you peeled the note away and unfolded it. MY FAVOURITE NOTEEEEE

THOSE LITTLE SHOES 🤭😭😭😭😭

It seemed like the last resort but you carefully opened every drawer until you came to your special underwear section. There sat a black box with the tiny note you’d been going crazy over and you quickly opened it with excitement to see what he had to say. OH THIS IS THE CHEEKYYYY ONE

THE FACT THAT HE IS ACTING LIKE THE BIG MAN HERE BUT WHEN HE'LL SEE HER IN IT HE'LL BE LIKE 🫠🫠🫠🫠

EHEHEHHEHEHE SHE IS PLAYING TOO MOUNT🤭

SHE MADE HIM PIZZA, SHE IS ME😌😂

Another note greated him there, this one attached to the fabric softener and he had a feeling you were about to ask him to separate his washing out but he still opened it with a smile. Thinking to himself he’d do it gladly if it meant it got him one step closer to you. AHHAHAHAHA POOR BOY WAS TERRORISED 😂

OHHHH THE MYSTERIOUS STAIRS🤭

Good boy huh? He thought, the term making him smile as he could tell what sort of mood you were in but he followed your instructions and went into the back of the cupboard where he found the door in question. GOOD BOYYYY

‘What the hell, did you build a staircase while I was gone?’ He joked, rounding the corner to hopefully see you but all the air left his lungs once he had. I LOVE HIS SILLY SIDE

‘Hi Mase’ you whispered. Catching on to how nervous he seemed as he played with the hem of the t-shirt he was wearing and avoided your eyes but you wanted him closer no matter how blushy and stuttery he was. HE IS NERVOUS

‘Sorry, you're making me nervous’ he whispered, his cheeks flushed but his eyes were happy and that made you smile too. ‘Can I have a kiss please’I'M SCREAMING

‘I think just after that note I left you with the shoes. I just wanted to make sure you’re fully on board like I don’t want you to think I’m forcing you into anything-‘OH MY LOVE

‘And you’re gonna be the best dad’ you whispered, watching his face light up before pressing a soft kiss to your lips. HE REALLY IS

‘You could never’ he told you truthfully before finally getting to do what he’d wanted to do with you for days. The same Mason you’d always known and loved but a new beginning on the horizon and you couldn’t wait to finally start the life you’d always dreamed of. OLLIE ON THE HORIZON 😌😌

BESTIE

OMG

I KNEW A LOT ABOUT THIS ONE BUT YOU DIDN'T FAIL TO SURPRISE ME

I LOVED EVERY LITTLE PIECE OF IT

ALL THE NOTES WERE PERFECT, AND I KNOW ALL THE EFFORT YOU PUT INTO THEM, SO IM SOOOO PROUD OF YOU

I LOVED THEIR FIRST MEETING AND HOW THEY IMMEDIATELY FELL FOR EACH OTHER

THE LIMGERIE WE CHOOSE🤭🤭🤭🤭 WE DID A GREAT JOB HONESTLY

I HONESTLY DON'T KNOW WHAT ELSE TO SAY....LIKE YOU LEFT ME AT A LOSS OF WORDS

THANK YOU SO SO MUCH FOR THIS ONE🩷🩷🩷 LOVE YOU AND YOUR BRAIN EVERYTIME A BIT MORE😌🩷

THANK YOU SM BESTIE

and thank you for the initial idea and helping me with all the ideas you’re just the best 🩷 and I’m so happy you liked it 😭🩷

LOVE YOU SM BESTIE

0 notes

hannahsrambles2 · 2 years

Text

Little life update that no one asked for:

I think I’ve mentioned before that I’m a university student and I live in student accommodation. This is my third year in this place and my god has it been a mess and I’ve only been here a week.

So the night before my parents and I were due to come down they rang up and asked to follow up on a email that had been sent a couple of weeks ago letting me know they weren’t finished remodelling my new flat so they’ve moved us to a new one. I didn’t receive this email. I’d like to point out that the remodelling of the whole accommodation was supposed to be done early September, they started in March and so far have accomplished three blocks…

So my new flat was on the fourth floor, the very top. We had to drag everything up the stairs to a room that was literally falling apart. Anyways I spent a week in this room, unable to unpack shit because I was due to move back out into the new room on Friday.

I had realised when I made it here that I had left my student card, very important thing that lets me into the uni and scans my attendance. My dad posted it for me when he got home. I have no idea if it had arrived because I was dumb when I moved into my new flat and handed the keys over because I forgot to check the mailbox for that flat. So now I have to wait till Monday to ask reception if I can get into it, not only that but to get back into the old room because some of my clothes have disappeared, I remember getting them ready to put in the suitcase and when I emptied that suitcase today, they weren’t there. So that’s fun.

Also I came back from food shopping only to find out one of my flatmates has broke out oven door. The outer layer is only glued on anyways so they’ve probably pulled too hard and it’s come away. I reported already and all I got was “if I see a contractor tomorrow I’ll let them know, if not you’ll have to wait till Monday” we can’t use the oven at all because it’s health and safety issue, use the stove part just not the rest!

And another thing: I had to carry a lot of heavy shit down four floors, across the courtyard and then up two flights of stairs. I am very bruised and still recovering. I had to take painkillers last night because my arms were in so much pain, I couldn’t even lift them.

So yeah, life’s great. At least I don’t have a mouse like last year x

0 notes

devotion · 3 years

Text

say it right → t.h

summary: you show a little contempt towards something tom loves. maybe somehow coaxing you into liking it will change your mind. in other words, he fucks you.

prompts: college (uni), porn without plot (?), small town.

warnings: fluff? + smut 18+ minors dni!! extended warnings below the cut.

notes: this ticks my boxes for the prompts on @rosyparkers’s fic bingo! also, no hate towards anyone studying history (i love it) just !! got stumped a bit with the plot but you'll see ;)

word count: 3.2k+ | masterlist

❀───❀───❀

ex. warnings: mentions of alcohol, dom!tom, bratty behaviour, a bit of ice play, fingering, slight degradation, dirty talk, kitchen (unprotected) sex (be safe!), one orgasm denial, pussy slapping, creampie.

❀───❀───❀

"fucking finally."

tom groans, tossing his backpack to the side after greeting you in the kitchen. settling back into the sofa, he exhales loudly; 'mentally drained' would be putting it lightly and the only reason to explain his pain is because university is stabbing him in the gut lately. however, it's fortunate that it was his last day of term; almost a month of no classes to deal with. and the smell of food wafting in the air is enough for him to forget his worries for a while.

luckily, you took your time walking back from the same uni an hour or two ago, having finished class earlier. tom was at a trip at the time you told him, the slightest bit of upset now that you couldn't get ice-cream on the way back home; only a little custom you both arrange at the last day, and to start the break on a high note.

with a text saying he was almost home, you prepared him some tea─just the way he fancies it. he'd be lying if he said he didn't notice the littlest things, one of them right now being the frequent clink of your ring when you pick your cup of tea. being married and in a six-year long relationship does that. and it subtly makes him smile at the thought of how far you've come. together.

after placing the mug in front of him, you see tom extending an arm around your midriff and before you know it, you're on his lap, his mouth brushing your hairline. then, your lips─meeting them in a sweet kiss. his grip on your bare leg tightens only focussing on how soft he feels against your mouth, how addictively you invade all his senses. like every other time, that same carefree warmth permeates his senses as you're within his hold.

once you hear the timer go off, you pull away, pecking him on the nose. tom releases you, nose ticklish and feeling almost intoxicated after such a short kiss.

"did you have wine?" tom asks you, tongue swiping his lip, savouring the flavour, "can taste it."

you wink in response. "m' mate gave it. left some for you if you want." at that, you head into the kitchen.

"what you making?"

"you know that extra pizza you made a few days ago?" he inclines his head in understanding at your reply as he gets up. "got it out the freezer and popped it in the oven. and can i just tell ya, smells fucking amazing."

he chuckles. the cooking class as an extra-curricular activity works then.

tom tags along behind you, shrugging his blazer off on the way there and hooking it on the coat hanger. he rolls up his polo shirt too and disregards it, the material making him feel stuffy. he feels under-dressed anyway, with you in just a silk robe and no bra─which is normal.

switching the oven off, you spin to see tom only in his slacks and black vest─a perfect fit, for sure. though you don't see a difference if he went shirtless; it's been a while where all of his tank tops, shirts included, have just been showing every crevice and defined structure of his abs and chest.

every time he comes in the room shirtless─now because of weeks of training with his mate, harrison─you've been left in somewhat of a dizzy state. he looks far more than sexy when he arrives home from the gym, in a way you can't particularly describe. you haven't mentioned it in fear of slacking due to the exams you had these past two weeks, knowing full well what would happen if you did. though, you admit it would've helped if you pointed it out, instead of him coming in front of you every now and again like... this. it's like he just wants you to say it.

as if his ego isn't inflated enough.

you roll your eyes at the thought. unbeknownst to you, he catches it, smirking.

it's working, he thinks.

but immediately the buzz of his phone effaces the thought of prompting you further. he'd have to leave flexing his biceps later in the evening.

tom gets distracted by the photos he's taken earlier on in the day, rather than harrison's text. you're taking the pizza out of the oven when tom asks you, making you whip your head around, "wanna see where i went to today?"

tom raises an eyebrow at you, waiting for an answer.

you hum, knowing briefly what he's talking about. he had mentioned it a week ago saying he was to go to a place nearby─somewhere in cirencester─as a treat from the history department and studying your market town.

"c'mere, look," his eyes light up, phone in front of your face as he explains, "this building, right, is the 'cirencester lock-up' where the criminals were kept back in the day."

you sit atop the table as he moves to come stand in front of you, examining the pictures-- for almost a minute. then, compelled to do anything but frown, with both your hands, you tilt his head with your forefinger so he could look at you. mindful of his love for the subject, you question him, "this... is the place you went to on your trip, is it?"

"yeah," his ruffled eyebrow furrows, "why? is it not what you expected?"

"well... thought it would be more... grand is all. looks a bit, dunno... shabby─"

you hear him gasp before you have the chance to continue. "─this is history!" he exclaims, before shaking his head at you; he couldn't believe his ears. "big or small... it means so much to this area. sure, it looks old, but they're literal gems of time's past."

the distress on his face is evident - that you can see. it's beyond him why you feel like this. but then again─the drama gcse he took in secondary school offered him the ability to stress a light situation far too much. up till the point, it looks a bit silly when he's being dramatic. to you, this was one of those times.

meanwhile, when you stare tom down, eyebrow raised, the brief aspect swims in the forefront of his mind─that being, you have a tendency to become a puddle whenever he hopes to cajole you into anything, regardless of what he wants. right now, either due to his boredom or you underrating history, it doesn't matter. tonight he decides that it's just going to be about you and him. with a little fun twist.

"i'll just pretend you didn't say anything for my sanity..." he trails off, a slight teasing tone present in his voice, "for now."

"thank god," you mutter. the light of the sun outside reflects on tom's rolex, the same one you gifted him on your anniversary, almost blinding you as its redirecting near your eyes; it's dusk, and the blinds aren't closed yet─also revealing a really beautiful sunset outside which you haven't had time to admire yet because of him. "can you also not blind me? much appreciated."

advancing towards you, he laughs dryly, head coming in level with your own. his happy demeanour from the moment he came home has changed: he's biting his lip, gaze boring into your own with his jaw tight shut.

but then, what really gets to you, the most poignant sound that makes your heart drop is that... he tuts.

you swallow; knowing tom, you feel like it's not really the end. with that in mind, you're not prepared for what's to come. yet immediately, your thighs squeeze together because of the electrical-like current that passes through your body─all the way to where you want him.

in short, you know you're his. heart, pussy and soul - his. and he certainly acknowledges that. your legs slightly go apart at the thought, ready to give any indication for him to bury his head where it rightfully belongs. it's hard not to - especially with the warmth that's radiating from him, his breath hot as he's a few centimetres away, as if luring you already.

the sudden change in atmosphere brings a chill to your spine. the control within his hands is powerful. and you're his victim.

tom gets the message. yet, he doesn't give in all at once. he wants to enjoy you, savour you, adore you. to simply rush would ruin doing all of those things.

"let's focus on how good you've been for me these past few weeks, yeah?" he starts, retreating back to the freezer. he dives in and then, shuts it, an ice cube at hand.

the confusion on your face doesn't go unnoticed; firstly, only one? second, he doesn't use ice except with gin. and there's none of that in the house. unless...

placing the ice cube on the table next to you to stop it from melting, he continues, "maybe after, i can fuck that attitude out of you."

it takes seconds for you to remark, "just because of history? seriously?" you resist the urge to roll your eyes, turning your head to the side, "for the love of fuck."

he shrugs his shoulders, "yep, that's me. i love to fuck," his arms come on either side of you, "any excuse to fuck you."

"so you're basically admitting that you're being a dramatic bi-"

at once, your bottom lip is captured with tom's, swallowing your words altogether when you deepen the kiss yourself. pulling away a little, his voice is raspy when he speaks, "my girl is always so ready for anything."

he knows you're wet, you suppose. it only burns the fire within you moreso at your implication. just as the belt of your robe is untied, your breasts are being caressed by tom's large and callous hands.

tom moves to kiss the underside of your neck, "my woman," a nip at your sweet spot, "my wife," another kiss at your clavicle, "my everything." the primal desire in his kisses grows with each kiss and the affection in his words is sufficient for you to bring him closer, crying out to him for more.

you plead, "tommy-"

"always ready for my cock," he starts again, making your breath hitch in an instant. you bite back a moan at his brazen choice of wording.

"what was that?" he presses, "you can't take it can you? my pretty girl can't take it."

"'course i fuckin' can't."

tom brings the ice cube from earlier over your clothed pussy, grateful for the cold weather. the extreme difference in temperature makes you hiss in delight, body quivering. already, water drips from tom's hands, and it's hard to tell whether it's your arousal or the melting ice.

after moving your navy blue panties to the side, he swirls it around your bundle of nerves again, hips jerking upwards. not only do you notice the cheeky glint in your husband's eyes, but the absence of the ice cube too as his own thumb replaces it.

"already melted?" tom chuckles, "this─" his middle and forefinger slaps your clit with a slight force that makes you yelp, "─warm for me, yeah?"

he doesn't give you a chance to respond, a finger entering your wetness in a heartbeat. whilst his thumb circles your clit, he adds another digit, starting to move in and out in a slow manner─watching you unravel before him.

"you feel so good for me, princess," he coos, leaving a sloppy kiss on your cheek.

darkness soon prevails the room, though not fully, as the street lamp outside only grants tom the pleasant view of your yearning state. a few minutes go by with your chest heaving─letting out aching breaths of air that sears the walls of your lungs. the only thing that treat tom's ears is the squelching sound your cunt produces. his cock twitches at the noise, feeling it pulsing the more the seconds tick by. he feels restrained in his boxers; it's a shame you're not witnessing how hard he is as your eyes are shut tight.

but it's not too long when he feels you convulse around him, because he starts going on a pace that would be considered merciless at this point. whines turn into loud moans, the pressure building up.

owing to this, your legs are shaking, unable to lay off the climax that's approaching. instantly, when at the same moment you become so close, the coil inside you on the borderline of snapping, your attention is averted towards tom's ridiculous belief. again.

"history is what makes us today, don't you believe that?" he pants.

you knit your eyebrows together, trying to focus on cumming first. yet, you snap your eyes open, to see him licking his lips, "t-tom, please─" you falter, chest heaving.

"no," tom responds bluntly, ceasing his movements then and there. his fingers─wedged deep inside your pussy─tense as you somehow suck them in further at his disapproval. you were so near to what you wanted. he goes on, "say it─"

"─gosh, you're insufferable, tom."

he responds by pressing his thumb harshly on your throbbing clit, making you whimper.

"i said say it," tom repeats, "say it right so you get what you think you deserve."

"say what, tom, huh?" you snap through gritted teeth, "history is great?"

"yes, for crying out loud."

"do i get bonus points if i act like i care?" you prompt, seeking to provoke him further; if irritating him will get him to fuck you, then so be it.

he flares his nose, reluctantly pulling his fingers out your dripping cunt. you gulp as you see him remove his trousers as well as his boxers, his cock springing out bold and unbound. you're enticed at his length, no matter how many times you've seen it─stiff and thick and his tip leaking pre-cum. tom catches you licking your lips and you're now more aware than ever of the hunger that lingers in his gaze.

as he strokes his cock, tom's eyes darken as he scans your figure. your body yearns for more, and it shows; the way your body arches up, the way your hands clutch the edge of the counter so tightly─you look so beautiful under his torture.

"just have to prove it to me, darling," he draws closer, "scream my name," he growls, his tip prodding your entrance to which you shakily gasp at the familiar sensation, "when i stretch your walls, i fucking want people to know that i make you feel good,"

"you gonna do that for me, princess?"

his free hand grips your hip, sliding behind to your ass to bring you closer towards the edge of the surface. after squeezing your bum, he slaps it─evoking a sharp jolt of your hips to move forward. the abrupt action causes the aching tip of his cock to slip inside your warm hole whereupon you both groan at the contact.

"reckon i could make you cum in five minutes?"

you shake your head, smirking, "two."

he grins, shutting his eyes and sinking in ever so slowly. he breathes out, "fuckin' ell."

your head falls back, moaning in agreement. fucking hell, indeed; he feels so snug, your pussy accustomed to his size easily as he reaches further. like it was made for him.

whilst your fingers claw into his shoulders, tom moves down to kiss you, mouth hot and wet as it explores every inch of your own and tongues moulding each other repeatedly. you take the chance to clamp around his hips, placing your foot below his ass─allowing him to drive into you deeper.

tom recedes, grunting, "oh."

forget seeing stars─you feel like you can picture planets as he rocks into you. it goes to show how long you've gone without fucking. long enough for your orgasm to be building so soon. two minutes it is. or maybe tom understands your body too well, bottoming out as soon as he sees your jaw going slack. the angle that he's pounding in at is beyond perfect.

soon enough, the shockwaves that edges nearer in your stomach compels you to shove your hips, meeting his strong thrusts without thought. tom's name rolls off your tongue over and over again, the volume of your voice amplifying the more he hits that spot deep inside you─up till the point you're screaming. just like he asked you to before. and there you are, cumming, clenching around his dick as you fail to remember your surroundings. and unfortunately, your neighbours, too.

it's rather quick when you hear tom crying out your name into your neck after you. his thrusts become sloppy, given that he's draining as much of his cum inside you─spending of what he has in him. eventually, he comes to a stop, as well as the harsh bite of his teeth below your jaw. you feel turned on again but not adequate enough for your body to want to come again; you're absolutely spent.

"were you teasing me the whole time?" he mumbles into your chest a minute or two later, still inside you, creating circles with the pads of his fingers on your waist.

the answer you give him lies in the glimmer of your eyes when he looks up at you. "of course i love history, babe," you tease, "glad i pissed you off, though."

"this is why we can't have nice things," he whines, "you're always fucking my feelings over."

"awh no," you murmur, "you know i love you and your inner-nerd of history."

a blush appears on his cheeks. "forget it, now the pizza's cold," he pouts, head resting onto your shoulder.

"your fucking fault, babe," you remark, palms smoothing over the sides of his head, "now eat it."

he has different plans. "wouldn't mind eating you out actually. much better," he murmurs, hands coming to sit on the inside of your thighs. he stretches them again, cock slipping out of your cunt. the whimper you let out is because you feel empty.

you crave to feel stuffed again.

"you really know how to change the mood very quickly. innit, tom?" you ask.

he ignores you; once he's in line with your core, his eyes lock with yours, your breath hitching at the prospect of him giving you head. even after fucking you senseless, you feel like you won't be able to take it.

tom's tongue is already prepared to dive into your hole─some of his cum he's dumped inside moments before decorates your thighs and dribbles onto the floor, though more of his seed seems to still be confined inside you.

it looks heavenly. all his.

"may i?"

❀───❀───❀

#tom holland #tom holland fanfic #tom holland fanfiction #tom holland smut #tom holland x reader #tom holland x you #tom holland x y/n #tom holland x reader smut #smut #tom holland preference #tom holland one shot #rosyficbingo #lmk what u think btw !!!!

518 notes · View notes

kuromochimi · 3 years

Text

Kageyama x Reader x Atsumu

A Minute Too Late

wc: 1,007

Content & Warnings: college setting, fluff, angst, suggestive parts in the following parts, please do not read if you’re not comfortable with talking about skinship and sexual topics!!

Playlist

You were ecstatic to say the least. You couldn’t believe that you were about to go to university with your whole high school squad. It for sure doesn’t happen very often. High school friend groups usually went separate ways for college but here you were with all of your closest friends.

You were moving in at the moment and you were more than glad to have yachi as your room mate. Across the girls’ dorm building, the two dorm units directly facing yours was occupied by the rest of your friends. One room being kei and tadashi’s while the one next to it being tobio and shoyo’s. After dropping everything off in your room, you decided to take a little walk around campus. It would have been nice to go with the rest of them but they were all busy at the moment. See, they all had already moved in 2 months prior. The clubs which they have chosen ahead of time required them to stay at the university dorms earlier than regular students for preparations or training and that includes today too.

While walking around, you noticed that you’ve been going around in circles. It was a really big campus after all and you weren’t exactly the best with directions. You had to admit, you were kinda lost.

“That’s exactly what having friends are for!” You thought to yourself.

Group chat conversation:

<yn: you guys I think I’m lost..>

< yachi: I can’t get out of club yet yn I’m sorry 😭>

<tadashi: me and tsukki are swamped with tasks too>

<shoyo: I’ll be out in 30 minutes if you can wait>

<tobio: I’m done training, where are you?>

<yn: I’m.. at this huge ass fountain in front of a building with brick walls>

<tobio: alright, wait for me there>

As you put your phone down, your stomach grumbles signaling your hunger. You grunt before taking a seat beside said fountain.

10 minutes

24 minutes

37 minutes

48 minutes

You have been waiting for kageyama for approximately an hour now. Your hunger seeming to have already passed and your mood was already declining too. You stood up to walk around and hopefully find your way back to your dorm but you were stopped by a familiar voice behind you.

“Now now what’s the pretty manager doing alone around here?”

You look back to see a handsome, tall, blonde man wearing a shirt from another university.

“Atsumu san? It’s been a while hi!” There was surprise in your voice and also a pleasant tone from seeing a familiar face.

“Yn!” He extends his arms for a hug and you immediately reciprocate his actions.

“So, what’s a girl like you doing alone here?”

“Oh I was waiting for tobio but I think he’s running a bit late.”

“You look like you’ve been waiting for a while now. How about grabbing something to eat?”

His offer was tempting and you were hungry too so you went ahead and agreed to him, shooting kageyama a quick text that you were fine and that he could head straight to the dorm once he’s finished with his current engagements. You weren’t mad at him though. You understood that maybe he had other things to do for club and he would never leave you waiting there on purpose anyway.

Atsumu took you to a nice ramen place right outside campus and you’re quite confused as to why he seemed so familiar going around when he doesn’t even look to be going to the same university as yours.

“So yn, what’re ya majoring in?”

“I’m a liberal arts major. But atsumu san-“

“Please, drop the formalities, atsumu is fine”

“Okay so atsumu, why were you at my uni anyway? You’re obviously wearing another university’s track suit”

“Oh well I went ta visit samu. He goes here”

“I’m just surprised. I never expected to see you again like this. Last time was during the training camp?”

“mhm and you totally rejected me too”

“Oh grow up atsumu. That was years ago.”

“That was only two year ago sweetie”

“Whatever”

The first time you met atsumu was at nationals. Karasuno’s first time attending. You were a first year and he was a second year. Next time you met was during training camp where he accidentally hit your arm with a serve which he felt super bad about so he made it his mission to make it up to during the whole training camp. Even tried to ask you out but you immediately rejected him because you already had your eyes set on someone else.

“Dinner’s on me by the way. I think it’s time for me to walk you back to your dorm. It’s getting late”

With a simple nod, you got up and walked out of the restaurant.

Kageyama’s pov

Just as kageyama was about to grab the rest of his things so he could come pick you up, his coach called for him

“Kageyama, you’re a very promising player. You just got there but I have been receiving dozens of invitations and offers for you. Mind staying a little longer so I could tell you about them?”

Thinking that this wouldn’t last more than 10 minutes, kageyama agreed and immediately lost track of time.

“That’s about it. Please tell me which ones you want to attend so I can respond to them.”

Kageyama acknowledged his mentor’s words. He checked his phone in panic once he realized that he stayed way past just 10 mins. He was met with a text from you telling him that you were fine and that he could head straight back once he’s finished. Despite your reassurance, he still felt guilty.

As he was nearing the dorm complex, a familiar figure comes closer, reaching the gate at almost the same time. It was you. Only, you were with another tall figure. Definitely too muscular to be tsukishima or yamaguchi. Too tall to be hinata. His eyes finally adjusted to the semi-dark setting and recognized the guy. It was Miya atsumu.

Notes:

> yn has been karasuno’s manager together with yachi since their first year in high school

> yn dand atsumu didn’t regularly contact each other and only ever talked during volleyball events

> among the karasuno squad, yn is closest to kageyama

#kageyama x reader #atsumu x reader #kageyama fluff #kageyama angst #atsumu fluff #atsumu angst #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu fluff #haikyuu angst

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theasstour · 3 years

Photo

𝐅𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐬.

𝐖𝐎𝐑𝐃 𝐂𝐎𝐔𝐍𝐓: 𝟏𝟎.𝟏𝐤 𝐍𝐁: 𝐚𝐥𝐜𝐨𝐡𝐨𝐥, 𝐚𝐧𝐱𝐢𝐞𝐭𝐲 𝐝𝐢𝐬𝐨𝐫𝐝𝐞𝐫, 𝐛𝐨𝐝𝐲 𝐢𝐦𝐚𝐠𝐞, 𝐞𝐱𝐩𝐥𝐢𝐜𝐢𝐭 𝐥𝐚𝐧𝐠𝐮𝐚𝐠𝐞, 𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬 𝐨𝐟 𝐬𝐞𝐱𝐮𝐚𝐥 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐭

Monday, 25 September 2017

It was strange to Y/N that she was enjoying herself as much as she was just then in an educational setting. In school, she had never really liked any of the subjects besides English, and here at uni, she got to sit and listen to professors who were truly experts on English literature ramble on about Othello and specific analysis on act 3 scene 3. She loved every single second of it, and was sure she could sit there for hours on end just listening to her professors. At one point she was sure this would all get tiring and she’d hate University, but in that moment, hearing her professor, Richard, talk about things that truly interested her, was such a breath of fresh air compared to what she had experienced previously.

The door to the lecture hall opened, and since the doors were right by the blackboard where Richard stood talking about Othello and the ‘temptation’ scene, all eyes landed on the blonde girl in pink shorts and a white jumper. She smiled at Richard, mouthing a “sorry” before taking the first free seat she could find, which was conveniently right beside Y/N. The two girls shared a small smile themselves before Y/N went back to focusing on the lecture happening in front of her. Y/N was hunched over her notebook, writing something off from the PowerPoint slide displayed on the wall in front of her. She did not know how much time went by, she was listening too intently to care about that, but suddenly, the blonde beside her rested her back against the seat and leaned a little closer to Y/N.

“This is quite boring, innit?”

Y/N looked to her left, and to her surprise, realised that the girl who had walked in late was Chloe. The same Chloe who she had met when she registered a week and some ago. She must have been too caught up in the lecture to pay proper attention to her surroundings.

Chloe let out a small chuckle, nodding in the direction of the PowerPoint before she continued to whisper. “The lecture. I knew we’d be discussing Shakespeare in Introduction to English Studies, but Othello’s just fucking boring, innit?”

“I…” Y/N looked at the PowerPoint for a few seconds, then back at Chloe. “Sure.”

They were quiet for a few seconds, Chloe just studying Y/N, eyes searching her face. “You like Othello.”

Y/N felt a sudden urge to relate to Chloe. Since they had met earlier and since she hadn’t made tons of friends on her course yet, she wanted Chloe to be her mate. If they got off on the wrong foot today, they might never sit next to each other again.

“It’s not as good as Twelfth Night, not as bad as Julius Caesar.”

Chloe continued to just look at Y/N, but suddenly, a smile came creeping over her lips. “Take it you like Shakespeare.”

“I like analysing his work, yeah.”

“More of a Modernism, and sometimes Postmodernism, girl myself.”

“I’m not big on either of those.”

Chloe let out a small chuckle again. “You won’t be taking Postmodernism next year then?”

“Not if I can help it.”

Chloe only crossed her arms and stared ahead, still smiling. For a second Y/N was afraid she might have said something to make Chloe detest her, but the next, she reminded herself that she had to live her truth regardless of what anyone said about it. “Guess we’ll just have to enjoy each other’s company in the core modules then.”

Y/N felt a few butterflies in her stomach at that and could not help smiling back at Chloe when their eyes met again.

“How come I haven’t seen you at any Freshers parties yet?” Chloe asked.

“Been busy applying to jobs and such,” Y/N explained. “Gotta get one as fast as possible ‘cause I need money to live.”

“Ahh, fair.” Chloe nodded. “One of my course mates, Hayden – think they’re up there somewhere –“ Chloe pointed with her thumb over her shoulder, indicating further up the lecture hall. “Has decided they’re going to start an Uno society.”

“Uno?” Y/N frowned. “As in the card game?”

“Yeah,” Chloe laughed. “I’m sure it’ll be nice and all, but they’re very passionate about it. Have yet to come out with me, Thian, and Annalise. Those are my other course mates, by the way.”

Y/N nodded. Was she just incompetent at making friends or was Chloe just very good at it? How had she made so many friends, made a small group by the sounds of it, and Y/N had barely talked to anyone on her course yet?

“Hayden promised to come out this Friday, though,” Chloe smiled. “You should come, too.”

For some reason, both nerves and excitement rushed through Y/N at that. She smiled back. “I’d love that.”

“Wicked. It’s at my Dinwiddy flat.” Chloe rolled her eyes. “Uni accommodation at Helmond is a huge piss take, I tell you. I feel like there’s mould everywhere.”

“That’s just UK houses in general. We’ll all die from it one day.”

“It’s literally disgusting,” Chloe said. “Also, one of my flatmates never does his dishes. It’s minging. And it’s started smelling, too.”

“Oh, my days.”

“Yeah.”

“I’m glad I just immediately moved in with my best mate instead of going through the whole uni accommodation thing. At least I can be assured that they do their dishes and no food’s left on the kitchen counter for too long.”

“Oh, that sounds lush.”

The people around Y/N and Chloe were all starting to pack their things and get out of their seats. Seeing as the two of them were sat by the edge of the row, they had to get up rather fast and let people through. So, that’s what they did. Y/N put her notebook and pencil case in her rucksack and slung it onto her back before she and Chloe made their way out of the lecture hall and out into the hallway beyond.

“There they are,” Chloe grinned, waving as she saw a small group of three standing by the wall a bit further down. “Come say hi.” Though Chloe wasn’t looking at her, Y/N assumed she was talking to her, so she followed her over to the rest. “Gang, this is Y/N, the one I met while we were both registering.”

“Ah, you’ll be Y/N, then,” a man with protruding cheekbones, a strong jawline, and deep set, brown eyes said. The Viet man’s smile lit up the room they were standing in, and it made Y/N’s overthinking ebb. “I’m Thian, pleasure to meet you. Chloe told us she met you, but never saw you since.”

“Proper rude of the universe to keep us away from each other for so long,” Chloe said.

“I’m Hayden,” a smaller person said with the greenest eyes and long brown hair. They too had a smile like Thian’s, but this one displayed crooked teeth, which made Y/N more at ease with her own bottom teeth that were the same.

“And I’m Annalise,” the last one said, her hair dyed an unnatural dark red colour that Y/N absolutely loved. “I think I saw you in a Critical Reading seminar.”

“Oh, yeah, I think we might be.”

“We’ll have to sit next to each other next time!”

Y/N could detect a slight accent, but she could not tell where Annalise was originally from. She suspected Germany, there were tons of international students here after all, but Y/N did not want to assume.

“Guys, we have to plan the first Uno society meeting,” Hayden said, looking at the time on their phone. “It was so nice to meet you, Y/N, but we’re in a bit of a hurry.”

She just smiled. “No, totes get that. I need to get back to my flat, anyway.”

“See you around, then,” Chloe smiled, waving as the four of them walked off.

Y/N walked home to Orsman Road. Though she knew there would be less walking if they took the tube, it would also mean that she had to walk on and off boiling hot tube trains and stations, and she was not about to do that. She was sweating enough in the late September sun as it was, she did not need the tube to contribute to her sweat moustache as well. Instead, she plugged her earbuds in and listened to her most recent playlist on Spotify, humming along to her favourite tunes as she walked.

She stopped by Gregg’s by Dalston Kingsland station, buying herself a sausage roll and an iced latte before walking the rest of the stretch home. Hackney bustled around her, with tons of cars, double deckers, and mopeds driving by, as well as all types of people milling to and from work. The early autumn sun was still a little too hot, but it seemed like most Londoners were soaking up the sun while they could. They were walking by in shorts, tee shirts, and summer dresses, while the only reason why Y/N was dressed in her tee shirt and trousers, was so she would not quite literally go up in flames on the way home.

Y/N arrived at Orsman Road not long after her trip to Gregg’s, and walked up to the flat. She locked the door once she was indoors, checking the kitchen and the living room to see if anyone was there. To no one’s surprise, none of her three other student flatmates were home in the middle of the day on a Monday. She walked up the stairs and to her room, letting her door be open so she could air out a bit more. Her windows had been open all day, so her room smelled fresher than normal as she entered. That just reminded her that she had to buy some scented candles or air fresheners to liven up her room.

Putting her rucksack down by her door, Y/N started looking through the two bags that she had yet to pack out from. In one was most of the stuff she’d put on her desk when she finally bought that, and in the other were loads of decorations that she had yet to bring forth. She started pulling out fairylights that she wanted to hang across her room or over her wall, when she heard footsteps. Out of the door directly to the right once you came up the stairs, came a man with short dark hair and a strong build, thin lips and pale skin. He must have heard movements outside his door, because his eyes landed on Y/N almost right away. However, he smiled at her and Y/N immediately knew who this was.

“You’re Y/N, then,” Mason said, walking over to stand in the doorway of her room. “Mason, your third flatmate.”

“Thought I’d never run into you,” Y/N smiled, making his smile grow.

“Yeah, got here like two days ago, and have been all over the place since. Helped some of my mates move into their flats, been at work, and at rugby practice.”

She nodded. “Busy man.”

“Very busy.”

“Lucky I caught you now, then.”

Mason nodded his head. “Would have eventually. Knowing Nath, he’ll probably end up forcing us all to bond as a flat at one point.”

“Sounds horrific.”

“It was. It will be,” Mason laughed, leaning against the doorframe and pushing his hands into his grey joggers.

Y/N furrowed her brows. “It was? He’s done it before?”

“Yeah, our first year. He made everyone in our flat bond, he especially talked about flat yoga sessions and shopping trips when he was drunk or high as a kite.”

She dropped the fairylights and turned her full attention on Mason. “You lived together your first year?”

Mason just looked at Y/N, blinking a few times. “Yeah.”

“All three of you?”

“All three of us. Me, Nathan, Harry, and like five girls.”

Y/N felt like screaming, but lucky for her dignity and Mason’s ears, the front door opened and closed. Nathan’s singing could be heard all the way upstairs. Instead of screaming, Y/N called Nathan’s name, not caring that Mason saw just how annoyed she was now. Poor bloke had no idea what he’d just said. Nathan strolled up the stairs and looked in Y/N’s room’s direction, his face lit up at the sight of Mason and Y/N together.

“What a view!” he grinned. “What’re you two bonding over?”

“Right now we’re bonding over being your friend,” Y/N said.

“Which I’m sure you’re both honoured to be, yes.”

“And I just heard you’ve lived with Mason and Harry for the last year, but have not told me,” Y/N said, ignoring Nathan’s previous comment.

Nathan looked to Mason, and then back at Y/N. “No, Harry moved in later. He lived in another flat first, hated it, and since him and Mason were good mates, he got to move into our place since one of our flatmates dropped out our first week.”

Not caring that she would smudge her makeup, Y/N ran her hands over her face. “How long did he live there, Nate?”

Silence for a second or two. “Start of second semester till we moved out.”

Y/N let go of a heavy sigh. “Nathan, why didn’t you just tell me?-“

“-I know, I know, I know,” Nathan started, walking into Y/N’s room and sitting down on the floor beside her. “I’m a shite friend.”

“You really fucking are,” Y/N said, swatting Nathan’s hand away when he tried to take hers. “Harry was both of our friend when he lived in Notts those months, and I literally had sex with him.”

Mason took a small step back in pure shock, blinking rapidly as if an eyelash fell onto his eye.

“Don’t I have a right to know you’re living with him?” Y/N asked.

“You do. Of course, you do. I just… I thought I told you at one point, and when I got home and I found out I hadn’t told you… I didn’t know how to break the news.”

“How about just telling me?” Y/N shrugged her shoulders. “Instead of hiding it from me like that.”

“Technically, I didn’t hide anything ‘cause I thought I-“

“-Nathan, I’ll literally skin you alive-“

“-Fine, I should have told you,” he groaned, taking her hand this time and holding it tight in his. “How can I make it up to you?”

Y/N thought for a moment, but came up with the perfect solution. “By coming with me when I go out with my course mates on Friday?”

Nathan just looked at her, blinking once. “My punishment is to… go out with you and your mates?”

“Yes. I barely know them, I need moral support. No matter how bad the person giving me said support actually is.”

Nathan looked down at their hands, patting hers slightly. “I’ll come.”

“Thanks.”

He continued to look down at their hands as Mason’s quiet footsteps back to his room sounded throughout the first floor. “I do have a lecture that finishes at 7pm-“

“-You’ll skip that lecture if you so have to.-”

“-Yes, ma’am,” Nathan answered without hesitation, kissing her hand and getting up from the floor. He gave her a small smile. “And I’m sorry. I know I should’ve told you.”

Y/N nodded. “Is there… Is there more you haven’t told me? In regards to Harry?”

Nathan pretended to think for a few seconds, eyes getting big as if he remembered something.

“Nath?”

He chuckled. “No, nothing.”

Y/N hit him on his calf before he walked away. “You’re bloody buying the first round of drinks on Friday.”

“As I should,” was all Nathan said before he danced off to his room. Y/N picked up her fairylights again, trying to get them out of the messy tangle they were currently in so she could finally make this room look like her and her new home.

Friday, 29 September 2017

Y/N was nervous. She was usually nervous before going someplace she had never been before, or to meet people she had never met, but it was never like this. Her nerves were almost always drowned by her natural eagerness to be around people, to be surrounded by friends and strangers. However, this, her first pre-drinks at uni with other people, had her feeling a little too nervous for her own tastes.

She loved parties. Fuck, if she could party every single day, she would. She did not care about the hangover that came the following day, as long as she had a good time the night before. At home in Nottingham, she would have loved to party as much as she had in London, but for some reason, meeting as many new people as she had, made her nervous for some reason. It was weird to Y/N because she loved making friends, but it was different here. She had yet to figure out what about University that triggered this reaction out of her.

A knock sounded at her door and she grunted, which Nathan took as a good enough sign for him to be allowed entrance. He grinned, sitting down on Y/N’s fluffy dark blue duvet cover and looked his best friend up and down.

“Lush,” he said.

Y/N glanced at the mirror in front of her again, running her hands down her sides. Her black ruched detail ribbed crop top fit her perfectly, making her tits look exceptionally good, and the gold necklace and earrings topped it all off. The crop jeans in light wash blue were tightened at the waist by a black belt with silver eyelets, the black lace up boots made her almost as tall as Nathan. Though Y/N had been out on town in Nottingham with this very same outfit, she was unsure about it now. There was a familiar fear in the back of her head; one that had not visited in a while, one that would lay low until it saw fit to paralyse her. Y/N was experiencing only the tip of the iceberg now. The rest would reveal itself later, it would all melt and drown her in nervous ticks and anxious tendencies.

God, she hated how nervous she was. This was not like her at all. Nathan knew this, which was why he picked up on how unusually quiet his best friend was. He got up from where he was seated on the bed, walking over to Y/N and placing his hands on her shoulders.

“What’s up?”

She took a deep breath, looking at him in the mirror. “You remember the party at Jack Lloyd’s?”

“When we were 17?”

“Yeah, and I was nervous to wear that tight-fitting dress? ‘Cause of my stomach?”

“Yes, even though you had no reason to be nervous.”

She sighed. “Well, I’m feeling like that now,” she admitted. “Not as intensely, but it’s there and… I haven’t felt this nervous about being seen in a long time.”

“What do you mean ‘being seen’?”

“When… When you’ve had and still have a hard time accepting yourself, it’s hard to let others look at your body ‘cause you don’t want to exist outside your own head, if that makes sense? Being seen means people will have an opinion, it means they’ll piece together this image of you before even getting to know you. It means them judging you on your looks alone before they get to actually know you.” Y/N shrugged her shoulders a little, Nathan squeezing them ever so slightly. “My confidence is much better now, but I still have those moments every so often when that 17-year-old girl I used to be will come back and whisper something discouraging into my ear.”

Nathan nodded, wrapping his arms around her neck and bringing her to him. She melted into her best friend, taking a grip of his forearms. “I know it’s much easier said than done, but focus on now. You’ve come so far, and though that 17-year-old is part of the reason why you are who you are today, she’s got nothing to do here. 19-year-old Y/N has come so far, she has no time revisiting the past ‘cause she’s going to a party tonight, and it’ll be fucking fantastic, yeah?”

Y/N chuckled, closing her eyes as Nathan planted an encouraging kiss to her cheek. “Guess you’re right.”

“Of course I fucking am.”

She laughed.

“Now, get your vodka, tequila, sourz, or whatever the fuck you’re drinking, and let’s go.” Nathan let go of her and walked to the door, opening it. “You got Chloe’s address?”

“Yeah, it’s Dinwiddy, flat 10.”

“Uni accommodation?”

Y/N huffed, reaching for her purse and putting it over her shoulder. “Did you expect my first-year mates to live anywhere else?”

“Not really. Dunno why I’m shocked.”

Y/N searched through her purse, checking she had everything she needed before reaching for her plastic bag where her drinks were.

“Still remember when I lived in Coopers Court with Harry and Mason. Oh, how time flies.”

Y/N stopped short, narrowing her eyes. “I still cannot believe you didn’t tell me anything about you living in the same flat as Harry your first year at uni.”

Nathan sighed.

“Cannot believe you didn’t tell me he went to Helmond. Cannot believe you wanted us to live together without at least informing me-“

“-Mate, are we done with this?”

“Don’t think I’ll ever be done. You tricked me into this.”

“I did not.”

“What did you think was gonna happen when I found out?”

“We’ve been over this,” Nathan said. “I didn’t think it’d be that big of a deal. Harry did not react like this when I told him I promised to live with you my second year, your first year.”

Y/N rolled her eyes, having already heard this.

“In fact, he did not mind one bit living with you.”

“I mind living with him.”

“Clearly, or else we wouldn’t still be having this conversation.”

Y/N tutted, walking past Nathan and down the stairs. “I’ll let this argument be for the time being, but expect me to pick it back up again tomorrow when my mind’s not all over the place. I want to be able to fucking destroy you.”

“Great. Can’t wait.”

Y/N and Nathan started walking in the direction of Dinwiddy, the biggest uni accommodation at Helmond, where most students ended up staying. Parmiter Street was a mere 30-minute walk away, and though they could have easily taken the tube, they both knew that it would be best for them to get some fresh air before drinking. Y/N also wanted to walk off some of her anxiety, though she was fairly certain that would not happen. On one hand she was looking forward to meeting Chloe and the rest of her English Lit gang, on the other, she was nervous. Her nerves came more from fear of experiencing the same blinding anxiety she had when she was younger, for that same feeling of helplessness and bottomlessness that it had brought her. What if it appeared when she was drinking? What if it got worse as she got drunk?

She hated how moving away to London and to University had brought her so much doubt. It was like she had to figure out who she was all over again. Here, it was only Nathan who knew her. Well… him and Harry, but the latter did not count. If Y/N so wanted, she could become a new version of herself. She knew that was something uni offered; finding a new you and shaping it into a person you want to be. There were several things Y/N wished she could change about herself. She had a horrible temper, was a little too loud at times, took many things far too personal, and more. She was unsure how much independence and a new environment could help make her a better version of herself, but she hoped Helmond and London could help her to some degree.

Once they arrived at Parmiter Street, Nathan walked straight onto Dinwiddy campus grounds and showed them the way to flat 10. The brown brick buildings rose five storeys high around them, shaping a small T formation with some benches along the stone path where people could sit on the few occasions when the weather would allow it. Nathan had been there the year before, loads of his friends from his Criminology course had lived at Dinwiddy accommodation and therefore hosted pre-drinks there. Nathan knew his way around, and, sure enough, he showed them right to flat 10. On the right hand-side, the first building, Nathan strolled over to the entrance.

He met Y/N’s eyes, trying to get a picture of just how nervous she was. After all, these were her friends, and had they been home in Nottingham, she would not have been this nervous at all. Nathan was not anxious at all, and he had never talked to – never met – Chloe or any of Y/N’s course mates.

“Listen,” Nathan said, giving Y/N a small smile. “If it gets too much, we’ll just go home, yeah? I won’t leave your side.”

Y/N smiled back, nodding her head. “Yeah. I’ll send Chloe a text saying we’re here.”

“We could just ring the doorbell.”

She looked at him. “Nath.”

“Y/N.”

“What were phones invented for if we’re just gonna ring people’s doorbells? I’m sending her a text.”

Nathan reached forward and rang the doorbell, making Y/N raise her eyebrows at him and take a deep breath as not to throw him against the brick building.

“Yes?” came from the speakers beside the doorbells. It was Chloe.

Nathan nudged Y/N, nodding in the direction of the speakers. She glared at him. “It’s Y/N.”

“Ahh, brill!” Chloe unlocked the door for them and Nathan opened it, letting Y/N enter first. They walked over to the stairs, looking at a sign there that showed them flat 10 at the topmost storey.

“They don’t even have a bloody lift, do they?” Y/N asked Nathan as she looked around.

“Gotta walk, mate.”

“Fuck me,” Y/N groaned as they began their ascent.

“I’d rather not.”

Despite herself, Y/N laughed a bit. They made it to the fourth floor, and Y/N knocked on the door as Nathan breathed heavily beside her.

“Hi,” Chloe smiled as she opened the door, stepping aside to let Y/N and Nathan in.

“Hiya,” Y/N smiled back, feeling her heart beat hard inside her chest. Something about Chloe’s smile, the reminder that she had invited Y/N over, that she wanted her there, settled atop Y/N’s shoulders, making them sag to a comfortable level. “Brought my housemate, hope you don’t mind.”

“Not at all!” Chloe said, turning to Nathan.

“Nathan,” he smiled. “Thanks for letting me come here.”

“Don’t mention it,” Chloe said, closing the door and showing them the way down a corridor towards the shared living space where a heavy bass was throbbing. The fluorescent lights overhead in the hallway resembled those at a petrol station, making Y/N squint as she entered the living room. There sat everyone she had the pleasure of meeting earlier that week. Hayden, Annalise, and Thian were all around the table with a glass each to drink. Y/N smiled at them, waving her hand as they all grinned back at her. She still felt like she was intruding.

“Y/N, Nathan, do you like sambuca?” Chloe asked, walking over to the kitchen bench to fetch plastic shot glasses.

“Never say no to sambuca, ey?” Nathan grinned, nodding for Y/N to go sit down so he could follow her lead. “We’ll have a shot each of you’re handing out.”

“I am, indeed,” Chloe said, getting two shot glasses and walking over to the table, placing the glasses in front of Nathan who looked absolutely ecstatic.

“Thanks, babe,” Y/N said.

“You lot playing a drinking game?” Nathan asked, getting his drinks out to mix them all together into his paper cup.

“Yeah, we’re playing Never Have I Ever,” Hayden answered. “However, if no one drinks, everyone’s got to take a sip except for the person asking, but the person asking’s gotta take two if no one drinks.”

“Ahh, alright,” Nathan said. “Creative. Love it.”

“This is Y/N’s friend, Nathan, by the way, guys,” Chloe said as she came back over with shots for everyone.

“Oh, yeah, this is Nathan. He’s a second-year, we live in a flat together in Haggerston.” Y/N suddenly felt stupid for not introducing him right away so that Chloe had to. She felt her cheeks heat up, but she refused to look like she felt headless. Instead, she got her vodka and cranberry juice out, mixing it as Nathan spoke beside her.

“We’ve known each other forever, so she moved in with me and my flatmates this year instead of moving into uni accommodation,” he elaborated.

“You knew each other in Nottingham?” Chloe asked, and, for some reason, the fact that Chloe remembered that made Y/N feel all kinds of warm.

“Yeah, been best friends for years.”

“How nice that you got to live together here,” Chloe smiled in Nathan’s direction, then at Y/N.

“It is, isn’t it?” Nathan said, looking at Y/N and giving her a small wink before going back to his drink.

“Right, we need to take advantage of being first-years and get drunk as often as possible,” Thian said. “So, tonight needs to be good.”

“It’ll be good regardless,” Annalise retorted, taking one of the shots from the tray Chloe had brought to the table.

“Where are we going, anyway?” Hayden asked.

Thian nodded. “Pub or club?”

“Don’t really feel like clubbing tonight, you know what I mean?” Chloe asked, the other three coming with exclamations of agreement or nodding slightly. “Pub then?”

“We have a pub right by us,” Nathan said. “Only 30 minutes away and it’s the best one in Haggerston, in my opinion anyway.”

Y/N wrinkled her nose some. “The Stag’s Head?”

“Yeah, it’s always full and they sometimes got live music and everything.”

“We could go there, yeah,” Chloe said. “If everyone’s in.”

“Could we take a bus there?” Hayden asked.

“30 minutes isn’t a long walk, though,” Chloe chuckled. “As long as Nathan and Y/N show the way, we won’t get lost.”

“Don’t count on my navigational skills when I’m under the influence, babes,” Nathan said, making the others laugh.

“We’re better off using Google Maps, he might just show the way to the Gregg’s by Dalston Kingsland where he thinks the entire staff’s got a crush on him,” Y/N said before taking a sip of her drink, laughter erupting again. It felt good, like a pat on the shoulder, and Y/N instantly eased. Maybe she had not lost her old self at all, maybe she could still feel at ease, even around new people.

“They all flirt with me, and who can blame them?” Nathan shrugged his shoulders, whipping his head to the side so his lush, curly red hair dangled at the top of his head, grinning his wide smile and making the lip piercing shine in the fluorescent lights overhead.

The rest of the night went on, and it was easier to talk to everyone as time progressed. Not only because Y/N got more and more intoxicated, but she also just felt better after getting to know them all. Hayden always laughed the loudest, and their laughter was also very infectious, making it hard not to chuckle along with them. Annalise, though she sometimes stuttered over a few English words, was incredibly considerate and would urge Y/N to continue on with her story when others did not hear her. Thian offered Y/N tons of shots and complimented her on her outfit, making it easier for Y/N to feel good and seen, as she had been terrified of back at the flat. Chloe was easily the boss, and did most of the talking, though no one seemed to mind. After all, Chloe had introduced everyone to everyone, so people knew her the best out of everyone.

As time went on, Y/N just felt better. It was easier to talk to everyone and, at one point, she thought she was back at home in Nottingham, introducing herself to strangers at a party. They all made it easy to forget just how nervous she had been. It made her look forward to seeing them in her other lectures and seminars the coming week and all those weeks after that. Maybe these were the people she would spend her time at University with, and that excited her.

Bottles emptied and the volume inside the uni flat had increased massively. It was close to 9 when Chloe suggested they leave, and assured Y/N that she could leave the little she had left of her vodka at her place to pick up another day. Y/N took her up on the offer, insides warm from both alcohol and Chloe’s hospitality.

Nathan showed the way towards Haggerston and The Stag’s Head, arm entwined with Y/N’s for most of the way there. At one point however, Y/N let go of him and ended up walking beside Annalise and Thian, talking about one of the texts they had to read by Tuesday. It was such a mundane conversation, complaining about course work and talking about coming deadlines, that it felt like they had been mates for ages. The chat flowed so easily, the laughter rolled off their tongues, and it just made sense for all of them to be together, walking along the dark London streets in their tipsy states, making their way towards what would hopefully be the first of many trips to a pub.

They arrived at Orsman Road and they could hear The Stag’s Head before they saw it. Y/N had never paid it much attention. She knew she would end up popping by once or twice during her time at uni, but she had not envisioned her checking it out that first week. Nathan held the door open for everyone, resting a hand at Y/N’s back as he followed her indoors last.

The pub was small, but Y/N was sure that it was bigger than it appeared late on a Friday evening. Straight ahead, in a V formation, stood the bar, a wall filled with bottles of all alcohol imaginable behind it, lit up by red light which fit the dark red of the counter surrounding it. Far down to the left, it seemed the rest of the pub disappeared from view, but judging by the stairs Y/N could see, she supposed there was a loo somewhere in that direction, and it also looked to be where one could go to reach the smoking area. People were both sat and stood by the bar as well as booths along the walls. What appeared to be the stage further down to the right was unoccupied by any performers, though a few lads stood there with a pint each. There were no free tables, and this put a damper on the mood quite quickly.

Nathan, however, pulled them all towards the smoking area and they were all pleasantly surprised to see a free table and two benches untouched. Fairylights hung over the outdoor space, from the house and over to the fence on the other side. It lit up just enough, made it possible to see, but not too bright for people to squint when walking out into the night. A few empty pints and a smoky ash tray stood in the middle of the table, but Nathan put the glasses on the brick fence before everyone sat down.

“Alright, I’ll pay for your drink,” Nathan said, smiling at Y/N. “Anyone wanna come to the bar? Y/N’ll watch the table.”

“Ah, yes.” Chloe got up, the rest of the gang following along and walking towards one of the two entrances to the pub. Y/N got her phone out, looking to see if she had any notifications she had to check out, but there were none. She was about to resolve to scrolling aimlessly through Instagram, when she heard a slightly familiar voice.

“Hi there.” Mason sat down on the edge of the opposite bench, a cigarette in hand and a small smile on his lips. “Didn’t know you and Nath would come here tonight.”

“Oh, hiya,” Y/N smiled. “No, we didn’t know where we’d go after pre-drinks. He suggested this place, so we brought some of my course mates with us here.”

“You going out later?”

“No, think we’re just gonna stay here.”

“Yeah, this is a chill place,” Mason said, puffing out some smoke.

“This is my first time here.”

Mason raised his eyebrows. “Is it?”

Y/N smiled. “You think I should’ve come here earlier?”

“More to do with the fact that our flat just loves this place, thought Nathan would’ve at least taken you here already.”

“He did now.”

“It’s my favourite pub around here, and Harry-“

“-Mase!” Nathan exclaimed, grinning as he came over with two gin and tonics. “You’re here as well!”

“Yeah, it’s a Friday night, innit?”

“Hi,” Chloe said, sitting down beside Mason with a wide grin on her face. It seemed like she wanted to introduce herself or to be introduced, but before Y/N could say anything, the conversation resumed.

“Hey,” Mason answered, looking back to Nathan who seemed to be ecstatic to see one of his flatmates. “Hear you haven’t taken Y/N here till now.”

Nathan sighed. “Not like I didn’t want to, just haven’t gotten the opportunity.”

“What’s so good about this place?” Y/N asked, looking from Nathan to Mason.

“Just close, innit? Also, it’s crowded, but it’s not as crowded as most pubs down by Kingsland Road,” Nathan elaborated.

“You lot have a good night, yeah? Need to get back to my mates.” Mason leaned past Chloe, stumping the rest of his cigarette into the ashtray before he got up, walking over to a big group of lads. Chloe stared after him as the rest of the conversation around the table started back up again, Y/N pretended to not see how she was checking him out. It felt like she was intruding on a moment that was not meant for anyone but Mason to see.

“You’re living with him?” Chloe asked.

“Yeah.”

“He’s well fit.”

“Guess.”

Chloe giggled. “You’re taking the rule to not shag one of your flatmates seriously, then?”

“Shouldn’t everyone?” Thian asked, furrowing his brows. “It only complicates everything.”

“How? It’s only a shag. It’s not like you’re gonna fall in love with them,” Chloe said.

“Can’t really control your emotions, though.” Nathan shrugged. “Two of my flatmates last year shagged. He had feelings for her, she just wanted a one night stand. Didn’t end well.”

Y/N put her drink back down on the table after a long sip. “Well, if you’re clear beforehand and make it clear that it’s only for this night and there’s no emotions behind it other than temporary bliss, then that’s okay, isn’t it?”

“Nah,” Hayden said, shaking their head. “It’s an unwritten rule. Don’t shag your flatmates.”

“Is it a serious rule?” Annelise asked, furrowing her brows.

“It’s got serious consequences,” Hayden answered.

“But if you’re both aware it’s only a one time thing, then is it serious?” Y/N asked.

“Babe, sex is complicated. You’re always just gonna be connected in a way, you know?” Nathan said.

“I can promise you I’m not connected to Ollie Lee in any way, shape, or form,” Y/N huffed, sipping her drink again as Nathan laughed, the other joining in because of Y/N’s obvious distaste in this Ollie Lee.

“Was he awful in bed?” Chloe asked, smiling as she looked between Nathan and Y/N.

“No, I was just desperate one night last year.” Y/N rolled her eyes at herself. “Let’s just say that mid-shag he asked me if I had to go to the toilet, and when I said no, he told me that whenever I felt like I had to, just pee on him instead.”

Gasps erupted around the table, and a second later, everyone started howling with laughter. Nathan kept on hitting his thigh, leaning into Y/N and laughing. Though it was a fairly embarrassing story on Y/N’s part, her definite lowest of low, she could not help feeling good about making everyone laugh like this. Looking around at everyone, she suddenly felt very good about herself, despite this being her worst sex story ever.

It was not like Y/N had fucked her way through Nottingham and had tons of stories to tell. In fact, she hadn’t shagged that many. She had had sex with eight people, three of them being women, one non-binary, and the other four men. She had been very vocal about the fact that the best sexual encounters she had had, were with women. They had all been so nice, and though it had never escalated to anything romantic beyond that one night together, they had made Y/N feel the best she’d ever felt. She suspected women just knew what to do, that they cared how she felt and did not solely care about their own release.

The group ended up just sitting around and talking for a while. It was nice to go somewhere outside of the uni setting and get to know some people, this was what uni was all about, or so Nathan had told her countless times. These people were as anxious about making friends and being liked as she was, but there they all were, making friends and going outside their own comfort zone.

At one point, Y/N had finished her drink and went to get another round for her and Nathan. The pub seemed to be even more packed now that it was closer to midnight. Everyone wanted to drink the week away, to forget about their lives for a little while and just spend time in good company. Y/N strolled over to the bar, looking up and down the counter to see if any of the bartenders were free to help her. The second her eyes landed on a familiar figure, she halted.

Harry’s eyes were already on hers as he stood almost right opposite her mixing a drink. He let go of a sigh, looking down at whatever he was mixing.

“You…” she started, raising her eyebrows. “You’ve got to be fucking everywhere.”

“Only ‘cause you’re every single place I usually am,” he said, continuing to make whatever drink he was making.

“Do you work here then?”

He looked over at her, raising one of his eyebrows. “I’m not a hallucination now?”

Y/N rolled her eyes.

“Can’t believe you thought I was a bloody hallucination.”

“Believe it. It’s all Nathan’s fault anyway. I’ll never forgive him for forcing me to live with you for a year.”

Harry let out a dry laugh. “To answer your question: no, thought I’d help out behind the bar to get me adrenaline going.”

“Well funny,” Y/N said. “You got me cracking up, can you tell?”

“Last time I checked, I got you laughing pretty hard, yeah.”

“That’s literally two years ago now.”

Harry finished the drink, putting it in a glass and placing it in front of the person standing just beside Y/N. Her eyes first landed on the watch on his wrist, the nice brown leather, and then her gaze travelled upward. She looked up at the man who was already staring at her, giving him a smile when she smiled at him. Their eye contact was put to an abrupt end when Harry poked the man’s hand holding the drink with the card machine. Y/N looked back at Harry, and then at another man with strong build and big, curly hair who stepped into view beside Harry.

“I’ll take care of her, Kai,” Harry said.

This Kai looked at Harry, blinking once before he met Y/N’s eyes again.

“She’s my flatmate,” Harry elaborated, making Kai study Y/N a bit more closely before he nodded once. He was very good looking, with a broad nose, almond-shaped eyes, and full lips, his brown skin glowed in the dim lights of the pub.

“That new one,” Kai said.

“Yeah.”

Kai smiled then, nodding in Y/N’s direction. “Nice of you to come check on Hazza. It’s always hectic on Fridays.”

“Oh, our other flatmate took me here, I didn’t come by choice.”

Kai’s eyebrows rose on his face and he looked at Harry who barked out a laugh, shrugging his shoulders at Kai as they exchanged a look. Harry walked over to stand right in front of her, signalling to Kai that he could take care of this one. Kai walked off, taking someone else’s order.

“Even feistier than I remember, you are,” Harry said.

She cocked her head to the side as Harry gathered a glass for her drink, already assuming that was what she was going to get. “You didn’t seem to have a problem with it before.”

It left her lips before she even registered she was thinking it. Harry only took a deep breath before meeting Y/N’s eyes again, clearly choosing to ignore her statement. “What can I get you, Y/N?”

“Sex on the Beach, please,” she said. “Two of them.”

“Alright.” Harry started making them right away, signalling to someone that he’d be right with them after this. Y/N looked around her, meeting the gaze of the man who had just stood by her at the bar. He raised his glass in her direction and she smiled back. She definitely had to go talk to him after this. He seemed to be a bit older, maybe five years older than her, but just for tonight, she did not care.

Y/N glanced back at Harry and watched him, fascinated by how fast he managed to make the drinks. “How long have you worked here, then?”

“A year abouts,” Harry said. “Worked in a hotel when we moved to Brum. Tended to work at the bar when the bartender was out.”

Y/N nodded, eyes on his hands as he poured ice, shots, and all types of alcohol and liquids into her drink. “You lived there till you moved to London?”

“Yeah.” They were quiet for a moment, both of them remembering all of the things that were left unsaid between them. All of those words, moments, and memories they had created during those months the two of them had crossed paths in Nottingham.

He cleared his throat as he put the drinks down in front of her. “If it makes you feel any better, I didn’t much like Brum.”

Y/N took a grip of the glasses. “And why’s that?”

“Dunno. Just didn’t find my footing proper.”

“In the two years you lived there?”

He shrugged. “Guess not.”

Y/N clicked her tongue. “Was it that bad?”

“Nah, I met tons of ace people and Birmingham’s a decent place, but…” He shrugged again. “Dunno.”

“Hmm,” she said, trying to decipher his words and if he was being truthful or not.

“Anyway,” Harry said, nodding to the drinks. “Take that other drink to Nathan – as I’m sure it’s for him – and when you bring that middle-aged man home later: please, be quiet. I have rugby at 11 tomorrow morning.”

Y/N’s mouth fell open. “How dare-“

“-Y/N, what’s taking so fucking long?” Nathan shouted as he came up next to her. His eyes fell on Harry behind the bar. “Oh… forgot to tell you Harry works here.”

“Nath, shut the fuck up,” Y/N said, looking from Nathan and back at Harry.

Harry nodded towards the door, silently telling them to fuck off, and they did. They walked back to the rest who were still sitting by the same table outside. Nathan took his drink from Y/N and sat down, but just as Y/N was about to sit down, she heard someone clear their throat behind her. She looked over her shoulder rather fast, blinking a few too many times when she locked eyes with the same man who had been standing beside her by the bar.

“Hi,” he said, giving her a broad smile.

Y/N almost felt herself blush. “Hey.”

“I’m George.”

She smiled. “Y/N.”

“Pleasure to meet you, Y/N,” he said, he gestured at the bench where she had just been about to sit down. “Mind if I sit down with you?”

Her smile widened. “Not at all.”

Y/N felt fucking terrible. Her room was too hot, too humid. Body sticky with sweat, limbs aching, throat burning with yesterday’s alcohol, and head throbbing, she opened her eyes slowly before shutting them again, groaning into her pillow. She hated herself for not drinking as much water before bed as she usually did when coming home from a night out. Sitting up, she looked down at the man beside her, racking her brain to remember what his name was. She ran her hands over her face, reaching for her glasses so she could see something, but quickly realising she left her contact lenses in the night before. Her eyes were so dry it hurt to blink and she suddenly realised why her head was hurting more than normal. Cursing herself, Y/N got out of bed with her glasses perched at the top of her head, picking up a tee shirt and some tights, pulling on her fluffy dressing gown before she made her way out of her room as soundlessly as possible.

She stumbled her way to the bathroom, locking the door behind her. First thing she did was take her contacts out, struggling to do so as the contacts were so dry, her eyes having dried out with them. She splashed water in her face next, then drank the equivalent to the Atlantic Ocean before splashing even more water on her face. She then put her glasses on, realising that she had to let her eyes relax some after what she had just put them through. It took her awhile to gather up the courage to go to the toilet, where she made herself throw up the nausea she was feeling before having a very long peeing session.

Moments of the night before came rushing back to her, and as she sat there on the toilet, she remembered more and more. The name George came to her like out of a fog, and then the details started falling into place. She remembered how he’d bought her more drinks, how the two of them had sat talking all night about nothing in particular. She remembered his hand on her thigh and him leaning into her to whisper in her ear. Then they were in her room, her front against the mattress and his weight on her back. It was all hazy after that, most of it just a mess of limbs and chasing a release that she had never caught up with. Though Y/N usually made it clear that she hadn’t come, she was too worn out to tell George. She remembered falling asleep almost the second they were done. To say she had been underwhelmed was an understatement.

When she was done, she walked down the stairs for the kitchen. Once again, she was left stopping right in her tracks as she walked in. Harry stood by the stove, eyes on the pan in front of him where he was making eggs, a few asparagus and peppers cooking beside the two frying eggs. For a moment, she debated walking back upstairs and leaving Harry to it, but then he glanced over at the door to his right, meeting her eyes right away. He gave her a tight-lipped smile before turning back to his breakfast. God… Y/N wanted to set herself on fire. It’d be better than staying inside a room with Harry alone after years apart.

He wore rugby shorts that reached mid-thigh, a white tee shirt to go with it, and a hairband to keep his hair out of his face. Y/N realised just then that he was getting ready to leave for rugby as he had told her yesterday he would. She could remember him doing rugby when they knew each other three years ago as well, but she didn’t think he’d still be doing it.

The small conversation they had in The Stag’s Head the night before lingered in the air between and around them. That was reason enough to turn and walk upstairs again. But as Y/N remembered who was waiting for her in her room, she stepped into the kitchen. She got two slices of bread and put them in the toaster, getting some butter and milk out of the fridge as she waited. She watched Harry’s back as she filled the kettle with enough water, quickly looking away when he moved to put his eggs on the two slices of bread on his plate. Biting her lip, Y/N got a mug and a teabag, looking back over at Harry as he stood holding his breakfast plate. Y/N took a deep breath, knowing exactly what she had to do.

“Okay,” she said only a second before Harry turned around to face her, mouth open as if to say something. He must have noticed the tension as well. “We need to talk this through. We can’t live together for the next year if it’s gonna be like this. Just gonna put that out there right away.”

“Yeah,” Harry sighed. “I’ve been thinking the same thing.”

Y/N leaned her hip against the counter, feeling relieved that she was not the only one out of the two that had thought about how incredibly awkward this was. “You’ve thought about it too?”

“Of course. I’ve been fuming ‘cause Nathan didn’t tell you sooner, and I’ve also found it annoying how I’m the bad guy in your eyes when this wouldn’t have happened if it wasn’t for Nate.”

Y/N rolled her eyes. “I haven’t thought of you as the bad guy-“

“-Y/N,” Harry said, putting his plate down on the counter again. “You’ve been angry at me this whole time. I can tell.”

“My frustration with you has got nothing to do with this situation, but all to do with how you just left without even saying goodbye before you moved away.” Y/N crossed her arms over her chest. “I’m trying to not blame you for this as well, but you’re right, Nathan’s the one that made this happen, we should be angry with him.”

“So you have been mad at me.”

“Well, you’re here, aren’t you?” Y/N narrowed her eyes. “Isn’t it just easier, no matter how stupid the reason, to just find more things to make you angry at a person? To make you hate them even more? Isn’t it just satisfying to find other ways to be frustrated with them?”

“No.”

“You’re no fun.”

“I am.”

“Anyway,” Y/N continued, getting her bread slices out of the toaster to put butter on them. “Why didn’t we say anything? If we’ve both thought it’s been awkward, I mean.”

“You’ve been busy shagging men 10 years older than you, I didn’t get the chance.”

“Look at you not being frustrated or annoyed with me.”

“I told you to be quiet last night,” Harry said, getting a fork and putting some asparagus and paprika in his mouth. “You weren’t.”

Y/N got the kettle as it finished, pouring some hot water into her mug. “So, what you’re saying is that you’ve been angry with me.”

“Not angry, just…” Harry sighed. “Fine. A little angry last night, yes.”

Y/N smiled. “And he wasn’t 10 years older than me, he’s five years older.” She paused. “I think.”

“Right,” Harry said, eating more of his breakfast. “Listen…” He swallowed. “I think we should just… We should just address it.”

“Yeah.”

They were both quiet, looking at the other and waiting for them to say what they were both thinking. Though it looked like he was about to reach for his bread to take a bite, Harry stopped himself. Instead, he took a deep breath, and said, “It was fucking terrible. That first time…” He trailed off, narrowing his eyes before he ran a hand over his face, remembering it all over again. “I didn’t even last a minute. It was mortifying.”

“It wasn’t half as mortifying as you trying to go down on me afterwards.”

Harry let out a small laugh. “Yeah, that wasn’t really…” He sighed. “I’m sorry.”

“No, we were both part of it. You don’t have to apologise for that.”

“You hear all these stories about how losing your virginity is supposed to be so beautiful, but it’s not. It’s really fucking not. Especially if you lose it to someone else who hasn’t had sex before, it just makes it double as awkward.”

Y/N nodded. “It was shit. Both of us were shit.”

“Exactly.”

“But I hope you know the reason I’m frustrated with you isn’t because of that.”

Harry looked away, biting at his bottom lip before he said, “Yeah, I know why.”

“Good, just wanted that to be clear.”

Harry nodded, taking his bread slice in his hand, making sure the egg wouldn’t fall off before he brought it to his mouth. “Well, now that we’ve addressed that, let’s just move on.”

“Let’s.”

She gave him a small smile before taking her teabag out of her mug and throwing it in the bin. There was still some tension in the room, but not enough for Y/N to want to set herself on fire like she had wanted to before. Just as she was about to take a grip of her plate and cuppa, the sounds of footsteps made her look up. George, who had been asleep last time Y/N checked, walked by the kitchen, halting as he saw Y/N and Harry standing there in the kitchen. He gave them both a smile Y/N could tell was forced, and then walked straight for the door without a single word or a second glance. Y/N and Harry looked at one another, sharing a look before they both chuckled ever so slightly.

“Cracking bloke,” Harry mumbled.

“Innit,” Y/N huffed, picking up her breakfast. “Have fun at rugby practice.”

“Cheers.”

She walked by him, hoping that her room did not smell of George or anything resembling alcohol or sweat. If it did, she would hit her head against the wall. But, lucky for her, George had left the door open, which had given the room a little bit of time to get the smell of last night out. After putting on her fluffy duvet cover, she opened the windows to let some fresh air in, and left her door open as she sat down in bed with her laptop, tea, and breakfast.

Just as she was about to put her plate down on the nightstand, she noticed something already laying there on top of her books. Adjusting her glasses, Y/N squinted at the object. She put her plate down on her duvet cover and reached for the wristwatch George had left. It was the nice leather one she had seen last night by the bar, the one that had caught her attention first. The digital clock seemed to have stopped working, displaying a random time that Y/N in her hangover state could not tell anyone what was. She was too fucked to even try and understand the numbers in front of her.

She put the clock back on her desk, hoping that she’d run into George soon so she could give it back to him. Or maybe Nathan could stalk Facebook and find him so she could message him there to tell him. She was glad she hadn’t exchanged phone numbers with George as she did not want to meet him again, but right now, she wanted to give him his watch back.

Y/N heard the front door open and then close, indicating that Harry had just left for rugby, and, as far as she could tell, she was the only one currently awake in her flat. The morning was quiet, she felt oddly at peace as she put on Fleabag and sipped her cuppa, and little did she know, this would be one of those rare moments over the last three years that this emotion inhabited her body.

NEXT UPDATE: Sunday, 7th March, 9PM GMT!

Huge thanks to my AMAZING beta reader! 🏛️ @aileenacoustic 🏛️ @devil-in-bw-the-sheets 🏛️ @sunflowerstache 🏛️ @fromyourstrulyh 🏛️

FIC PAGE | COME TALK !!!

#harry styles #harry styles fanfiction #harry styles x reader #harry styles smut #harry styles x you #harry styles fluff #harry styles angst #harry styles fic #1dff #AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHGIWGOJGI PLS COME TALK !!!!

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lightsovermonaco · 3 years

Text

His Good Sweater: Chapter 4

Masterlist

Thank you as always to my best friend and Beta reader @acollectionofficsandshit for putting up with me and my ramblings ♥

Word Count: 3.8k

Recommended song: "ily (I love you baby)" by Surf Mesa and Emilee

You'd never been more thankful that you kept a change of clothes in your car than you were after the race at Silverstone. You'd showered again, changing back into the sweaty tee and leggings. The clean emergency hoodie and jeans were a blessing, and casual enough for a night on the town.

Most of the crew had left, only a few poor souls pouring over race data or packing up essentials. James let you into the trailer yard this time without hesitation. "We really should just get you a key," He teases, "Sure would make my life easier."

Rolling your eyes, you give the tower of muscle a pitiful shove. He doesn't move an inch. "Thanks James. I'll ask Pierre to look into it."

A sudden wave of tiredness washes over you when you make it back to the trailer. You flip through the channels on the tiny television, settling on an analysis of the day’s race.

“And a brilliant drive from young Pierre Gasly, wasn’t it John?”

“I completely agree Martin. Gasly took advantage of every slip up by Mercedes and Red Bull and he has to be commended for that. Max made some rare mistakes and…”

You smile to yourself, their praise washing over you. Yawning, you curl up on Pierre's bed, the familiar smell of cedar lulling you into a light sleep in minutes.

**********

A gentle touch to your cheek wakes you some hours later. You crack your eyes open, greeted by a smile brighter than the stars in the night sky. You taste eternal sunshine on his lips when you kiss him, your soul sparking in response to his light.

"Good morning," He murmurs, thumb rubbing along your jaw. "Sleep well?"

You snuggle closer to him, eyes closing once more as you soak up the warmth. "Is it time to go out already?"

"It is. But we can stay here if you want to." He brushes a stray hair off your face. The gesture is so tender, if you didn’t know any better you’d never guess he could turn into the seasoned, take-no-shit racer you’d seen hours before.

You shake your head. You couldn't let him miss out on celebrating his victory with his closest friends. Besides, you hadn't seen any of them for a span of time longer than a few minutes in months, and truth be told, you missed them all.

Those boys had a knack for turning the simplest of outings into unforgettable adventures. You had been sworn to secrecy on numerous occasions after Pierre recounted drunken escapades that usually ended with Max sleeping somewhere preposterous, like a claw-footed bathtub in a fancy suite.

“Where are we going?” You ask sleepily. “Somewhere nearby?”

Pierre tugs you up until you’re sitting. He pulls you back against his chest, arms wrapping around you as he sets his chin on your shoulder. “Yeah. Maybe ten minutes away.”

You lean your full weight against him, admiring how perfectly your bodies slot together. “Can I leave my car here?”

“As long as you’re okay with it staying here until tomorrow, that’s fine.” He coaxes you to stand and presses a kiss to your temple as a reward. Your limbs are still heavy and uncooperative. Pierre winds an arm around your waist, supporting you and assuming the position of your rock as he always did.

"You don't sleep here," You state simply, looking at him for confirmation. He shakes his head.

"Wouldn't be enough room for two anyway." He gestures to the tiny twin sized bed and shrugs.

Your brow furrows. “Am I staying with you tonight?” You honestly had not considered it. The jet usually left early and you had assumed he would want to get as much rest as possible. But now that you had experienced waking up next to him, you realize how much you want his face to be the first thing you see when you open your eyes each morning.

“Of course you’re staying with me. I’m taking every second of your time that I can get.”

You bite your lip and lay your head on his shoulder. The idea of falling asleep in his arms was enough to shake any lingering sleepiness. “Okay.” Confident that you could hold yourself up, you step out of his grasp. “Ready.”

The few mechanics roaming about the grounds are enough to keep you cautious. You walk through the paddock a hair's breadth apart, although every nerve screams for you to touch him. Every time your arm grazes his, electricity ripples across your skin. All you want to do is hold his hand, but there’s enough prying eyes that you restrain the impulse.

You can tell he feels it too by the way his fingers curl and uncurl at his sides. And he's biting his cheek, you notice. A nervous habit of his and a clear indicator that he'd retreated inside his own head, likely contemplating if he'd truly deserved to win today or not.

Every few months his doubts crept in, the devil on his shoulder reminding him that Horner hadn't deemed him good enough to keep his seat at Red Bull after only a handful of races.

You'll never be as talented as them, is what you'd imagined it whispered. They're only here because they pity you. What makes you think you deserve a seat?

It couldn't be farther from the truth. Deep down, Pierre knew that. Driving in Formula 1 meant being under constant scrutiny from the public and sportscasters. Making an error meant debates about whether you were good enough and rumors about seat security.

There were no such errors today. You'd heard the commentary after the race; everyone was raving about his performance. Not one person had dared say he didn't deserve it.

Not wanting him to suffer alone, you subtly wrap your pinky finger around his. "You're okay," You say softly, his head whipping to you. "You deserved that trophy today. It was some of the best driving I've ever seen, everyone agrees. You deserve a trophy every time you get in that car. You'll always be my champion, even if the world tells you otherwise."

It takes a moment for it to sink in, but he nods and releases your pinkie. "You're my grounding rod," He says, lips curling in a knowing smile, and you can't hold back your laugh.

"Leave it to you to turn a romantic moment into a cheesy one." Instead of saying you're my rock like any normal person, he had to bring up the time you'd embarrassed yourself at the bar a year or so ago. He'd let you prattle on to poor Dan about building grounding rods of all things, and how you'd thought your professor's way of designing such a system was flawed. Pierre would never let you live that down, it seemed.

Max spots the two of you first, waving from where the boys had gathered outside Red Bull. “About time you showed up! We’ve been waiting for ten minutes!”

“She fell asleep,” Pierre says simply, his confidence back. “Takes her awhile to wake up.”

“Whatever, I’m just glad you’re here,” Daniel says, throwing an arm around your shoulders and tucking you tight to his side. You couldn’t help the broad smile creeping onto your face, twin to the aussie’s as you hug him back.

“We missed you,” Charles says, falling into step beside you. “I never hear from you anymore!”

You grimace. It was true, while the three boys had texted you quite frequently the past few months, you had barely responded to them. You felt guilty about it, knowing they were taking time out of their packed schedules to catch up. But uni had been kicking your ass and the only one you’d found time for was Pierre. Looking back, you were glad he had been the exception.

“Yeah, sorry about that,” You say. “Lots of projects.”

“And that new internship,” Max points out. Your eyebrows flick up, gaze flicking to Pierre. You had been awarded an internship a month or so ago at a local engineering firm in London. It was only part time work, a few hours a week, but it was enough. The only one you had told was Pierre.

Pierre grins, the gesture a silent apology. “I may have spilled the beans.”

You cut him a glare, the others laughing at your attempt at being intimidating. But you couldn’t turn away from him, not when he was looking at you with the same pride you had felt when he’d won earlier that day.

“Uber’s here,” Charles announces, checking his phone.

“Where?” Daniel asks, and Charles indicates a black SUV parked at the curb. Daniel and Max exchange a look, shouting “Shotgun!” at the same time. Both boys break into a full sprint, feet pounding on the pavement. Daniel wins - barely, leaving Max and Charles to squeeze into the back seat.

Pierre follows you into the third row of seats, his hand immediately engulfing yours. Your stomach flips, glancing up to find a reassuring smile on his face. You could barely focus on what was said for the first half of the ride, hyperaware of the callouses rubbing your skin. The world around you erupts into color at the touch, completing the part of you that you’d never realized was missing.

The remainder of the drive is filled with laughter, jokes, and plenty of selfies with the driver. It wasn’t every day one could brag about having four world class drivers in your car; you couldn’t blame the man for being excited.

By the time you arrive at the bar, your sides are already splitting with laughter. “First round is on you, Ricciardo,” Charles says, wagging a finger at him. “Punishment for bringing up the Abu Dhabi incident again!”

“Jokes on you, I was already planning on it!” He glances at you and winks. “Gotta congratulate the winner somehow, right?” Little did the Australian know, you had already congratulated Pierre a few hours ago, and you doubted that a few shots would outshine that performance. You hope the pink tinge that rises to your cheeks with the memory isn't obvious and you duck your head just in case.

A blast of air conditioning hits you as you all stumble into the bar. All eyes fell to you and the ragtag group of drivers when you entered, silence blanketing the patrons. The bartender slams a fist on the wooden bartop, rattling glasses and making you flinch.

“Been wonderin’ when you lot were gonna show your ugly mugs!”

Daniel, Max and Charles erupt into friendly laughter, shaking the man’s hand and making small talk. You look to Pierre for an explanation.

“Tradition,” He murmurs. The noise returned to a normal level around you, though you could feel the glances thrown your way. “We come here every year, but only if one of us wins at Silverstone. Been awhile since that happened.”

"Ah," You say, nodding dramatically. "Yes, very long time." Pierre grins, shaking his head.

"Who won this year?" The man - William, Pierre informs you- asks. He towered over you when you sat on the sticky bar stool, tall and lanky but well muscled and certainly not someone you would expect patrons to try disrespecting. He was already pouring five shots of a fine Irish Whiskey, waving Daniel off when he tried to start a tab. “My treat.”

Max claps a hand on Pierre's shoulder. "This one claimed the crown, for once!"

"Wey hey!" William says, passing out the shots. "Everyone else crash out or what?"

"You should watch the replay," You say, knocking Pierre's shoulder with your own. "It was amazing. The move he used to get past Max-" you bring your pinched fingers to your lips in a chef's kiss. "Gorgeous."

"Much to Max's despair," Charles adds, raising his shot. "To the underdog!"

You all echo the sentiment, the boys knocking back the strong alcohol with practiced ease. It didn't go down as smooth for you, burning your throat and making you wince.

Daniel laughs. "Not used to drinking with us anymore, huh?"

"Must have lost my edge," You say, the woody taste lingering in your mouth. "I'm sure it'll hit me hard in a half hour or so, too."

**********

Well, you weren't wrong about the alcohol hitting you like a punch to the gut. Two shots later and you were swaying like a sailor on his first excursion out to sea, Pierre's shoulder the only thing keeping you from toppling off the bar stool.

Pierre's eyes were bright as the others poked fun at him, William joining in with a witty remark now and then. His laugh wrapped around you like a warm blanket, keeping you content and grounded.

"Hey Pierre," Daniel says at one point, "Don't look now but that table of girls has been obsessed with you all night."

Pierre, blitzed as he was, pays no attention to Dan's warning and turns around. A loopy grin was plastered on his face, turning back and shaking his head.

You may not have been able to think straight, but your stomach lurches. Instantly sobering slightly, you follow Dan's gaze to the indicated table to your left. Three beautiful women sat there, whispering behind their hands and clearly speaking about Pierre. One bit her lip and caught your eye, giggling. Her looks were universally attractive enough that she would be anyone’s type, Pierre included. The possessiveness in the gaze she raked over his body set your blood boiling.

This… was not a scenario you wanted to play out. You didn't know if Pierre was ready to tell his friends about your relationship yet. You knew he wouldn't let any of those girls have the light of day, but he might let them fawn over him a little, just to protect your secret. And it would kill you, but you would have no choice but to let it happen.

"I'm good," Pierre says, sipping the beer he had been nursing all night.

"Come on mate," Max pushes, a wicked grin on his flushed face, "That blonde is so your type."

No she isn't.

You’re already staring up at Pierre when he turns to you. You have always worn your emotions on your sleeve for anyone to see, and it only got worse when mixed with alcohol. Pierre smiles softly, taking mercy on you. Slowly, he takes your hand and threads your fingers together before turning back to the boys.

"One of you can tell them I’m not interested. I already have my girl."

Heart beating wildly, you scan your friends faces. They were all wide eyed and slack jawed, staring at your joined hands. Pierre gives your hand a gentle squeeze, reminding you to breathe. He read you like an open book, offering reassurance when you needed it most.

"It's about fucking time!" Daniel roars, breaking the tense silence. Your shoulders relax, grinning along with the others. Pierre beams at you, knocking your shoulder to say I told you so.

"Does this mean I get a break from listening to you obsess over her every weekend?" Max asks, giving you a meaningful look.

"Likely not," Pierre answers. "I'm still just as obsessed as before. Maybe more." Max pretends to gag, earning him a playful punch from Charles. God, it was so freeing for your relationship to be more open, even if it was just between your closest friends.

"I'd just like to point out that I told you two this would happen years ago," Charles says matter of factly, pointing at Max and Dan. "Should've taken you up on that bet."

Your mouth hung open. "You were going to bet on us being a couple?"

"Oh come on," Max says, rolling his eyes. "We all knew it was coming eventually. We just didn't know when!"

Pink stains your cheeks, but Pierre laughs and leans in to kiss you. Remembering the girls behind you, you press a little closer to him. Under the guise of placing a kiss to his cheek, you meet the blonde's eyes and smile sweetly.

The woman preens, mouth twisting. Good. Pierre was yours, and now that he'd admitted it, you could let those girls know it. His hand slips to your thigh, squeezing hard. A clear warning that you were venturing into dangerous territory. You didn't care.

The alcohol in your veins makes you bold, and you want to drive your point home. They could look all they wanted, but he was coming home with you. You push the boundary farther and bite the soft skin of his neck just hard enough to leave a mark. Pierre's hiss finally makes you pull back and look up at him innocently.

"Get a room," Daniel teases with a wink. You smile at him, mumbling an insincere apology. Your point had been made. The arrogant smirk had been wiped from the woman’s face, replaced with a grimace.

"I think it is time for us to get going," Pierre says, annoyance flashing across his face. Oh, you had stoked the fire and now you would have to face the consequences.

"We're just getting started," Charles complains. Pierre slaps a few bills on the counter and gets up without responding.

"Bye guys!" You call over your shoulder as Pierre drags you towards the door. They all wave back, Max's lower lip jutting out in a pout. Your eyes slid one more time to the blonde, who had her arms crossed over her chest. You give her a wicked, taunting grin and return her earlier wink.

Pierre halts so quickly that you run into him. “Why are we leaving?”

“You know why,” He growls, flagging down a cab. “You didn't like how she was looking at me, so you did something about it. You might not have noticed, but every man in that bar had their eyes on you. So I’m following your example and doing something about it.”

Your brow furrows. Pierre won’t meet your gaze, and your eyes fall to the purple mark on his neck. You didn’t like his tone; it bordered dangerously on anger. “Are you… Are you mad that I did that?”

Tears threaten to spill when he finally looks at you. God, you were a blubbering drunk. When your lip wobbles, his anger fades and he sighs. “I’m not mad. I just… I didn’t think you’d want me flaunting our relationship yet. When you did this-” He gestures to his neck- “I could barely keep my hands off you. Not when I saw the guy walking up to you.”

You sniff, trying to conjure the image of the bar. “I didn’t notice anyone.”

“Yeah, cause I dragged you out here before he could say anything.” Pierre pulls his hood up and sighs. “Trying to catch a cab here is harder than overtaking Hamilton.”

You laugh harder than you should at the off-hand remark, following after him as he trudges down the sidewalk. “Why are you not drunk? I feel like you should be drunk. You won a race. They were feeding you shots one after another.”

“One of us had to be responsible and make sure we got home okay.” He smiles over his shoulder at you. “And I knew as soon as you had that first shot it would have to be me. Didn’t you notice me handing the shots to the other guys?”

“No,” You say, rubbing your eyes. “What about the boys? How are they gonna get home?” Pierre stops, forcing you to do the same. He tugs your hood up, makes sure his is secure enough to hide his face, and grabs your hand.

“I already told Seb to come round them up in an hour or so. They’ll be fine.”

You don’t respond, too busy trying to put one foot in front of the other and not fall on your face. It doesn’t help that your vision is a tad blurry. Finally you give up and whine, “How much further?”

“It’s right there,” He says, pointing at a towering glass building just across the street. “In five minutes, you can be tucked into a cozy, fluffy suite and you can rest all you want, my love.”

You hum at the words, warmth flooding your veins from more than the liquor. “I like that.”

“What, the building?” He asks, amused. He helps you cross the empty street, making sure you’re paying attention to where you’re going.

“Noooo, what you said,” You clarify, leaning on him as you try to navigate the handful of steps leading to the hotel.

He’s quiet until you reach the elevator. “My love,” He murmurs, and you grin up at him.

“Mon… mon coeur,” You manage to say, somehow pulling the French phrase out of the dregs of your memory. The words are slurred and you know that you absolutely botch the pronunciation, but the intent is clear. You may have lived in France since you were 18, but learning the language wasn’t a requirement when almost everyone knew english as well. But the two of you had spent many hours watching Pierre’s favorite french films over the years; some of it must have unintentionally rubbed off on you.

A disbelieving smile tugs at his lips. “How do you even know what that means?”

You shrug. “Just do.” The elevator doors open and you step out, Pierre following. You halt, not knowing which hall to take. You glance up at your companion for help, only to find him staring back at you. “What?”

He shakes his head and leads you down the corridor to his room. It's a spacious corner suite, with huge windows facing Silverstone that give him a perfect view of the track. You make for the window but Pierre’s hand on your wrist stops you.

“I don’t think so, it’s time for you to sleep.”

“But I just wanna see,” You protest weakly.

“Nice try. I know you. You’ll sit in front of that window for hours if I let you.”

You give in only because he was right. Cityscapes of any kind drew your attention like a moth to a flame. You pouted anyway, but let him take you to the bedroom. Gentle pressure on your shoulders had you sinking into the plush mattress, groaning at the luxurious softness. Pierre laughs as he helps you out of your shoes and jeans, leaving the hoodie.

Eyelids drooping, you climb under the covers Pierre had pulled back for you. He tucks you in and kisses your temple. You grab for him, tugging on his shirt until he stoops down and gives you a proper kiss. When he steps out of your grasp, you panic.

“Stay,” You mumble, fear bubbling in your chest. He had to stay, he couldn’t leave, not when you only had this one night left-

“I’m just taking off my shoes,” He assures you, his weight sliding in behind you to settle against your back. You sigh, moulding yourself to him as best you could. Being in his arms was somehow familiar, even if he’d never held you like this. It felt like home.

“Pierre?”

“Hmm?”

“I love you.”

Pillowy soft lips press to the nape of your neck. “I love you too, mon coeur.”

Tagging: @flashcal

#pierre gasly #pierre gasly imagine #formula 1 #f1 #formula 1 imagine #f1 imagine #formula 1 fanfiction #formula 1 fantasy #formula 1 fanfic #formula 1 fic #f1 fanfic #f1 fanfiction #f1 fic #f1 fantasy #formula 1 rpf #f1 rpf #pierre gasly x reader #pierre gasly fanfiction

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hockeyforthefirsttime · 3 years

Text

Home For Christmas- Mat Barzal

AN: This is no shame, I started this before Christmas with the intention of finishing it as well... bitch I didn’t, so here we are.

Word count: 4k

TW: bad parenting, mentions of cheating, kind of angst? idk

Sitting alone by the kitchen table, you watch the snow fall heavy over the town. You’re supposed to be working on your masters thesis, but your mind is a thousand miles away, 2 185,4 miles to be exact.

And even that far away, Mat is still everywhere to be seen in a town he’s never been in. He’s in the cafe with the really bad coffee and the really good cakes, he’s in the window reflection in the old thrift shop you used to go to when you were younger. And you can imagine him so easily outside on the front porch, playing in the snow.

In all honesty that would be ideal, having him here. But he’s not, he didn’t have the opportunity to come. You understand that. You understand that he’s got his own traditions, family and friends to see.

But when you left JFK to come to the cabin in Alta, you wished that he was by your side, you by his. Instead of the snoring man that sat on your right hand side the entire flight. At least you got the window seat.

Your parents went out to have dinner or visit some friends, you don’t care enough to remember.

All you could think of was how Mat had been babbling about how excited he was for Christmas, and going home. And how you deep inside dreaded coming here. It’s not that your parents don’t love you, they just love the idea of the past you. Mat cares for you a lot, you know that, you’ve settled for that. But you haven’t had the heart to tell him how your parents only care for perfect facades and flaunting their riches. That's also why you haven’t told them about Mat.

The snow is still falling over the perfectly decorated front lawn.

You’re still thinking of Mat and how he would look with rosy cheeks from the cold, when your parents move in through the front door whilst talking in low murmurs.

“Y/N, darling? You’re still awake?”

Your mother asks, not yelling though, never yelling. She waits until she can see you from the hallway.

“Yes, still kind of working.”

You answer politely.

“Oh, you’re still writing your thesis?”

Quickly as she comes around the table, you switch from the spotify tab, to the uni home page.The lie comes smoothly and she doesn’t notice, she never does.

“My little hard worker, you’re gonna be such a good psychiatrist one day.”

And your heart sinks all the way down to your stomach. You’ve never told them that you switched majors three years ago. Or that you’re not writing a dissection of the human mind, but rather a song. As well as a thesis.

“Hey, I’m gonna go to my room.”

Your mom nods at you with what almost resembled a fond smile. Passing your father in the hallway you see him slip something into the pocket of his already hung coat.

“Night sweetheart.”

“Night dad”

You smile half heartedly while balancing your books and laptop in your hands.

No matter how nicely the property is decorated, no matter how hard you try, you’ll never be what your parents expect you to be. They are much like their cabin in your opinion, pretty and inviting on the outside, shallow on the inside.

You don’t know how to handle this. Because while you grew up a lot around here, New York feels like your home now. With pictures on the walls and tiny memories littered around the place. The bedroom you’ve always had in the cabin hasn’t changed much since you last were here. Pictures of people you no longer talk to still hang on the vanity you never used.

Crawling underneath the thick duvet, you pull your phone off the charger on your nightstand. There are a few messages on snap chat and instagram you’ve missed. Mostly friends from college, all in their respective homes with their old friends and family.

You close both of the apps, and sigh when you see the wallpaper of your phone. It’s a picture of you and Mat. You’re dressed in a hoodie with his jersey over it and his arms slung around your middle from behind, the both of you smiling at Beau behind the camera. You remember that day.

It was in the early days of your relationship and only the second or third game you had been too of his. The Islanders had played the Rangers and won, Mat scored twice and it was overall a good game. The WAG’s had all started to head for the locker room hallway, while you set your path for the exit, planning on meeting Mat back at his apartment. Lauren was the first to see you trying to sneak out. And had instantly called you out on it. She’s a miracle worker with people, and within seconds she had figured out how scared you were that Mat wouldn’t want you there. After all this was a team win, and you didn’t quite feel like you were a part of the team. Not yet at least.

And despite your fears, Lauren convinced you that he would love to see you first thing as he exited. And he had been. His already beaming face had swept you up in his strong arms and spun you around. Mat truly was and still is at times more excitable than a puppy.

-----

You wake up abruptly from someone yelling. That someone you quickly recognize as your father's voice. And your heart drops, even though the words are muffled, you can imagine the scene. Your mother, sitting at the kitchen table, in the same spot as you sat last night, telling him to calm down and stop yelling. Your father pacing in front of her, screaming about something you can’t quite figure out what is yet. He is obviously ignoring her.

Picking your phone up from the mattress as you sit up, there doesn’t seem to be anything new. You enter the messages app and shoot Mat a message, telling him to call you in thirty minutes.

With a sigh, you pull the warm, comfortable duvet off yourself and drag your body out of the bed. Everything in the room seems a little colder, and you know it’s probably because of the badly isolated windows. That’s probably why the cool floorboards tickle your feet when you step on them. Luckily there is a pair of thick socks on the floor next to the bed, so you pull them on and walk to the door.

Carefully you let the door creep open silently.

“- and why couldn’t you just leave it be?”

You hear your father yelling.

“Because you’re my husband and I love you, you’re not supposed to have a second phone, much less a second girlfriend.”

Immediately your stomach sinks. Your dad has a mistress? Then it was probably the second phone he slipped into the coat pocket last night. God, christmas spirit, eh? You shut the fight out of your mind instantly, not wanting this to be your christmas. In this moment you hate all the bad hallmark movies you’ve watched with Mat. Not for having watched them, but for letting them give you hope of a normal christmas.

On autopilot, you start packing the bag you never finished unpacking. It takes fifteen minutes for you to finish. Your phone starts ringing as soon as you zip the back shut. With a deep sigh you answer the phone.

“Hi Mat.”

“Hey, babe. You okay?”

You can hear laughter in the background and the smile in his voice. You hate yourself for the next words.

“No, not really.”

The admittance lies heavy in your chest, but some of the weight seems to lift off when you speak the feelings into existence.

“I’m sorry, is there anything I can do?”

It's like the world disappears for a minute, and just hearing his voice calms you down.

“No, I don’t think so, I just don’t think I can handle this right now. ‘M just gonna head home to my apartment. I can’t take my parents right now.”

It’s a relief to get the words out of your mouth and into existence. You can imagine him right now, with the cute frown on his face and the cogs and wheels in his brain turning.

“Hold on, you’re not gonna spend christmas morning alone are you?”

“Why not? It’s not really different from what I’m used to, and it’s already the 23rd today anyway.”

“That gives you just enough time to fly here!”

Your heart soars at the thought of waking up with Mat in his childhood home, but reason strikes you seconds later.

“Mathew, I’m not gonna intrude on your family like that.”

The sigh he releases on the other end of the phone, is followed by a small chuckle.

“You’re not intruding. I promise. Plus they all love you.”

------

You order an uber straight after calling Mathew. When you open the door to your bedroom, the yelling still hasn’t stopped. The log walls have always been pretty soundproof, but you swear, right now there is an echo in the house. Silently you close the door behind you. Your dad is still ranting on about how none of this is his fault, and how some things women simply don’t understand.

You sigh and take off your shoes to make your steps even quieter than usual.It’s not that your father isn’t kind, it’s just that he seems to have been too kind to another woman. And it puts a great deal of fear into your heart. It makes you scared that Mat might do the same.

You shake the thought (almost) out of your head, Mat is not your father, and you are not your mother. Still, you can’t help but feel like your mother deserves better. Leaning against the door frame, you pull up your phone and start scouring the web.

The uber app alerts you of your rides arrival, and you go into your travel backpack and pull out a piece of paper and a pen. Quickly you write down the number and name of both a divorce lawyer and a couples therapist. Your coat is already on and your bag doesn't have wheels, so it’s a silent endeavour to the other bedroom in use on this floor. Your parent’s room.

It looks like it always has. Everything is neatly put behind closed doors and the bed is perfectly made. No knick knacks on the bedside table, not even a book or an alarm clock. You sigh, put the note on your mothers side of the bed and leave.

You’re glad the kitchen doesn ‘t have a clear view of the hallway, your parents are too immersed in their fight, to notice the fact that their child is slipping through their fingers. They don’t notice you walking away from them.

------

The airport is not so surprisingly filled only with stragglers and people who are most likely working this christmas. The pine trees are decorated and everywhere, but you don’t feel as sick to your stomach as you usually do. Quickly you find your gate. It’s got a great view and you watch the snow fall under the lights of the airport and sip the holiday drink you uncharacteristically got from the coffee shop beside the gate. You have already checked in the luggage, so yet again you pull out a pen, but also a worn and torn leather bound notebook that’s been with you since the start of your degree.

The songs usually come from poems but somehow this one is different. You start the melody quickly, writing down notes and sometimes little words that you feel make sense with the melody. Your hands start to itch for the ivory and ebony keys of a piano, but just as the feeling arrives the flight attendant calls up your flight and you have to pack up.

The plane is only half full, so you get a row to yourself. Resting your feet across the two free seats is a little uncomfortable, you’ll admit as much, but the feeling of having the piano at least on your computer is settling some of the itch.

-----

Mat comes alone to pick you up from the airport. He’s standing in the parking lot leaning against his car. The second he hears you approaching he looks up from his phone, pockets it and meets you halfway. Immediately he hugs you tight.

“Hi babe, I missed you.”

He says with a low voice into the scarf wrapped around your neck. You just hug him tighter. The tension that took a hold of your body during the layover, is releasing from your body. Mat’s entire being is like a weighted blanket covering you.

When he lets you go, you miss his warmth, but it’s short lived. He picks up the bag you dropped to the snow covered ground and puts in the trunk before opening the passenger door for you. Upon entering the car, you are engulfed in everything Mat and warmth.

“You gonna tell me what’s going on with your family?”

You sigh at the question, knowing it was going to come sooner or later. To be honest you’re glad he asked now, and not back home, back with his family. It’s just, how do you explain the entire messy situation to Mat, without getting pity points? You don’t want to feel like some charity case or, even worse, like some spoilt child who can’t handle the situation.

Instead of dwelling over it for too long, you decide to jump into it as he starts the car and enters the freeway.

“My dad is cheating on my mom, and she found out last night. I think they were up the entire night just arguing. I just left a note on mom’s bed with the number of both a divorce lawyer as well as a couples therapist.”

You rant off, state it matter of factly. Trying to shut off your emotions.

“Are you okay Y/N?”

Mat asks. Simple as that. He asks you if you’re okay, and you can’t quite handle it. The tears are pressing on behind your eyes. And you look out the window, trying to hold them back. But when he puts a hand on your thigh, you let the first tear fall.

“No.”

And it really is as simple as that. You’re not okay. And you hate it. Just in that second your phone starts ringing in your back pocket.

“Sorry.”

You say as Mat looks at you. He just gives you a soft smile. You check the caller id, and see it’s your mom. Quickly you clear your throat and wipe your tears away.

“Hello mom.”

You answer, trying to sound neutral.

“Y/N, where are you? Did you go to one of your friends here? I can’t find any of your things.”

She sounds confused to be honest.

“Yeah no, I left, I’m on my way to my boyfriend’s house.”

You hear her suck in a breath. Probably trying to calm down. You do the same, hoping for a calm conversation.

“You didn’t tell me you had a boyfriend? Where are you?”

You sigh, know it’s gonna be a long conversation.

“No, I know, I didn’t tell you on purpose. He lives in New York usually, but he’s from Canada.”

Ideally, you know, this would be a conversation to have with Mat, about why you haven’t told them about him, before you had it with your mother.

“You’re in Canada?”

“Yes.”

“Well, what does he do then?”

“Mom..”

You start to avoid the question, but she interrupts you.

“No, I want to know what he does that makes you think it’s okay for you to run away from your family right before christmas.”

In that second, just a split second, you get a little fight in you.

“First of all, it wasn’t his call, he invited me, when I called him. Originally I was just gonna go back to New York. Alone. Second of all, I am not interested in spending christmas around you and dad when you can’t figure out your lives. Third of all, he makes me feel safe and appreciated and I can’t imagine being anywhere else right now.”

You can feel the tears streaming down your face, but you don’t care.

“Fine, if you are going to be like that then.”

“I am gonna be like this mom.”

“Fine.”

She says, and then she hangs up the phone. And to be honest you’re kind of glad she did.

“That sounded rough.”

You nod and close your eyes. You don’t want things to be this way. You truly don’t, but it the way it is.

“You didn’t tell them about me?”

Mat asks. Possibly sounding hurt.

“No, I was scared that they were gonna be who I know them to be, especially upon finding out that you play hockey for a living.”

He sinks a bit back in the driver’s seat.

“You think they wouldn’t like me?”

He definitely sounds hurt.

“I think they would like your image, your paycheck and what you could do for them publicly.”

You answer earnestly. Before continuing.

“They want a solid paycheck and all the nice things in life. The things that prove that they’ve got a lot of money, and that about sums it up.”

“Oh, well that’s not good.”

Letting out a sad chuckle, you nod your head. You can tell you’re closing up on his house because he seems to be driving slower now.

“I hope you know I’m not into you for the paychecks.”

“No I know-”

He turns and smiles at you.

“You’re in this, for the amazing sex, eh?”

“Oh, for sure.”

You smile and take his hand.

---

Waking up is always kind of heavier in the winter, but with Mat’s arms wrapped around you in the morning, it’s just something else. You fell asleep in one of his hoodies and flannel pj pants. You’ll admit it, it is a bit too warm, but hell it’s so worth it.

You can feel him behind you, bare chest rising slow and steady. Soft snores escape him every now and then, but his arm around your waist stays there. Mindlessly, you start tracing shapes and letters on the back of his hand. You feel his hand start twitching, and all of a sudden he squeezes you tight and pulls you on top of himself.

“I love you too.”

He smiles up at you with his bleary eyes. Your cheeks heat up. You didn’t think he’d actually notice the letters you had been spelling out on his hand. So you hide your face on his shoulder and stay there. Just placing small, light kisses there.

“Can you say it? Like out loud?”

He asks you, quietly.

“That I love you?”

Immediately you feel him smile into your hair.

“I love you Mat Barzal.”

And you swear, you can feel his heart skip a beat in his chest.

“Merry Christmas, by the way.”

You say, feeling content. This is by far the best Christmas morning you’ve had, and you haven’t even gotten out of bed.

“Oh shit, it’s Christmas morning!”

And before you know it, the light is on, and he’s out of bed and pulling on a shirt and a pair of sweats. He turns and looks at you expectantly.

“Well, aren’t you coming?”

He asks, moving in your direction. Mat all but drags you out of the bed and barely let’s you go to the bathroom to brush your teeth, before meeting his family downstairs. And it’s a glorious sight that meets your eyes. The christmas tree is decorated with little lights and different colour baubles?, as well as glitter. It looks homemade, and not like the perfectly decorated trees that have made their mark on your childhood.

The sight of it causes you to stop dead in your tracks. God, how you love the normalcy of this. The morning is filled with laughter, jokes and copious amounts of hot chocolate. It’s not until the end of the gift unwrapping, that Mat slips away from you, claiming that he has to go to the toilet.

He returns a few minutes later, carrying a big box wrapped in paper. It doesn’t take you long to notice that all eyes are on you.

“Maty, I told you no gifts.”

You sigh, but you can’t help the smile that creeps onto your lips as you see how giddy he is.

“I know I know, and originally I was going to stick to it, but I saw this in the store and I know you said you’d manage without it, but I just couldn’t help myself.”

And as you listen to him rant his heart out to you, realization dawns on you.

“You didn’t seriously..”

Your sentence trails off as you watch him carefully place the box down on the dinner table.

“Please, just open it?”

And he knows you could never resist his pleading, just as well as you do. Nodding, you head to the table and start unwrapping the way too expensive gift. Soon the logo of the electric keyboard begins to unravel to you, and tears are seriously prickling behind your eyes.You pull the sleeves of the hoodie over your hands and wipe the tears away.

“Mathew, this is seriously the best christmas gift I have ever gotten.”

You mumble. He comes over and wraps you up in his arms again, and you can feel him smiling, how his entire being is happy, and maybe a little proud of himself. His mom and dad gush over how cute the two of you are, whilst Liana rolls her eyes with a fond smile.

“Well, why don’t you play us something sweetie?”

Mats mother asks you carefully once you unwrap yourself from Mat.

“Yeah, I can do that.”

And just like that the living room is cleared enough for you to set up the keyboard along with a chair from the kitchen. You even go back upstairs and find the chords you have written down for the song you wrote in the airport.

Testingly, you play a few chords. That is the moment you notice how quiet they’ve all gotten, so you decide to speak up, just to shake the nerves a little.

“Okay, so this is kind of a rushed song, I wrote it on my way here, but I do hope you like it.”

And then you start playing the first notes. You do love how the keys seem to find their way to you right away, like you’ve been playing this keyboard for a long time already. And then the words spill from your mouth. And you just sing.

Careful what you say

This time of year

Tends to weaken me

And have a little decency

And let me cry in peace

But there's a place where I

Erase the challenges I've been through

Where he knows every corner

Every street-name

All by heart

And so it is a part of my

Courageous plan to leave

With a broken heart

Tucked away under my sleeve

I wanna find home for Christmas

Let me find home this year

I wanna find home for Christmas

Let me find home this year

I'll pack my bags

And leave before the sun rises tomorrow

'Cause we act more like strangers for each day

That I am here

But I have someone close to me

Who never will desert me

Who remind me frequently

What I I can truly be

And so it is a part of my

Courageous plan to leave

With a broken heart

Tucked away under my sleeve

I wanna find home this Christmas

Let me find home this year

I wanna find home this Christmas

Let me find home this year

I don't know what my future holds

But I know who will love me

I can’t tell you where I'm from

But this one loved me to life

And so it is a part of my

Courageous plan to leave

With a broken heart

Tucked away under my sleeve

I wanna find home this Christmas

Let me find home this year

I wanna find home this Christmas

Let me find home this year

Playing the finishing keys, you look up from the keys, and see both Liana and Nadia smiling through a few tears. Mike is holding his wife close as he smiles at you. But Mat, he looks at you like you hung the stars in the night sky.

Quickly you get up from the chair and wrap your arms around his neck. Closing your eyes, just letting yourself be completely enveloped in him.

For a second though, he pulls slightly away, just enough so he can look you in the eyes.

“I love you so much, and you’ll always have a home with me.”

Your heart swells ten times bigger than what your chest is made to encompass.

“I know. I love you too.”

#mat barzal #mat barzal imagine #mat barzal blurb #mat barzal fic #new york islanders #new york islanders imagine #new york islander fic #new york islanders blurb #nhl imagine #nhl new york islanders #nhl fic #nhl blurb

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pitviperofdoom · 3 years

Text

I wrote something for Aspec Archives Week!

Prompt: Wish/Pride

Warning for internalized aphobia, some elements of exclusion

(AO3)

He had a test the following day on a unit that had been giving him trouble, so he was too absorbed in his lecture notes to notice the growing gathering until someone brushed past him to join it.

Jon glanced up, faintly irritated. He didn’t have much of a right to complain; he was in a student lounge, not a library, and there were no rules limiting chatting and gathering here. There was only one of him, after all, tucked away at a corner table where no one was paying him any mind. He could always move.

His memory tugged at him. He’d heard something about a club meeting here today, hadn’t he? Someone had announced it, at some point…

Halfway across the room, one of the other students glanced up and noticed him staring. A tentative smile broke out on her face, and she jerked her head at the others settling down on the couches and armchairs. “You here for the meeting?”

“The…” Jon hesitated. “What was it, again?”

“LGBT coalition,” she answered. “We meet here every other week?”

“Oh! Oh, I…” Embarrassment stalled his tongue—his presence now felt like an intrusion.

She was still looking at him, polite and open and welcoming even though what she was offering wasn’t—it didn’t have a place for him, he didn’t need it, and they certainly didn’t need him taking up their time and space—

“I’m just ace,” he blurted out, lamely. The word felt odd on his own tongue. He’d never spoken it out loud before, much less to describe himself, and the moment it was out, he was seized in the grip of sudden doubt. He longed to take it back—what if he was wrong, what if he just wanted the attention that came of stepping outside the norm—? “I’m not really…”

The girl shrugged, still polite. “That’s okay. Everybody’s welcome, if you want to join us.”

It wasn’t—he didn’t really count—

“Thank you,” he said, and turned back to the notes in front of him. The girl must have turned her attention back to the group, because she didn’t press him, and neither did anyone else.

The meeting went on, but Jon had a test coming up and only one day left to study for it, so he tuned them out.

That was fine. It had nothing to do with him anyway.

***

Jon wasn’t altogether sure when his mind made the switch. There was no spark, no grand epiphany, anymore than there had been when he first understood himself at all. It was a gradual process, full of maybes lingering in the back of his mind, testing it like ice beneath his feet, until one day he simply understood it to be true.

He thought about that day from time to time, that quiet afternoon he’d spent in the student lounge, surrounded by notes, with possibility blooming just within reach.

He hadn’t reached. And now here he was, his school days well behind him, smarting from the missed opportunity.

The button was a small victory, but it felt like a hollow one. The point of these things was to share them with someone, to show them off to those who understood, and now…

It was with quiet resignation that he fixed it to the strap of his bag. Too little, too late—the time to show these things off was long past him. All he could do now was wear it and imagine a world in which he’d been a little less pathetic.

***

“Nice button.”

Jon’s eyes were beginning to smart from the screen. He’d missed his required break again, too absorbed in the project in front of him to acknowledge the promise of a tension headache in his forehead. He looked up reluctantly, and did a double-take when he realized that Tim was sitting on his desk, on top of his accumulating stack of printed articles.

“I beg your pardon?” Jon blinked hard, several times. Tears welled up from strain, and he wiped them away on the heel of his palm. The research office was drafty, and his hands were cold enough to soothe his aching forehead, as well.

“On your bag,” Tim explained, pointing. “Spotted it from across the room and thought, thank God, you know? Last place I worked was a bit stuffier, you’d never see people showing off.”

“I’m not—I’m not showing off,” Jon spluttered. Truth be told, he’d forgotten the button was even there.

“Right, wrong choice of words,” Tim said, wincing. “Think I’ll get yelled at if I swap my mouse pad out for one of my own? It’s got bi colors.”

Jon relaxed, just a little. Tim was older than him by a few years, but he’d only started at the institute last month, and the idea of having any sort of seniority on him was… odd, to say the least. “I doubt anyone would mind,” he answered. “No one’s said anything to me.”

“Fantastic!” Tim beamed. “Reminds me of my uni days. We should start a club.”

Jon laughed humorlessly. “Now that might catch Elias’s attention.”

“Might be a good thing. You do anything for Pride around here?”

Jon paused, wracking his brain for a moment. “What month is that, again?”

“Take that as a no, then.”

“I’ve never had anyone to do it with,” Jon replied, which wasn’t quite true. He’d had Georgie, once. But that had been a long time ago, and they’d never…

It’d just been too new to him. Too much like a gray area between two sides of a binary, before he’d known better.

“Seriously?” Tim went on, oblivious to what was going on in his head. “Where’d you go to school? Nobody does pride like university kids.”

Instinctively, Jon glanced around at the rest of the office. The other desks were unoccupied, which was odd considering how sure he was that someone had been around to overhear this. Where was everyone…? Oh. It was lunch already. Where had the time gone?

“Just never had the chance,” he said. It came out unexpectedly bitter. “At the time, I was…”

His voice trailed off. He’d never told anyone about this. Georgie had already been out of his life, and he’d just… never had anyone else to tell. But here was Tim, looking at him without a trace of judgment, open and expectant like he was actually interested in what Jon was saying.

“I knew I was ace at the time, but I didn’t realize I was anything else, yet,” he finished. “So I just… never joined any of the…” He gestured vaguely.

The expression on Tim’s face shifted. It was the first time Jon had ever seen him look cautious. “You know ace counts as queer, right?”

“Oh, yes,” Jon replied. “I know that now.” He shrugged, easing a page out from under Tim. Obligingly, Tim got off his desk to let him. “But I didn’t then, and… well, that’s that. Missed my chance, I suppose.”

Tim snorted. “Jon, you can’t miss your chance to make friends.”

You can if you’re me, Jon thought. Out loud, he said, “Still wish I’d known better, back then.”

“Ah, well. Least you do now.”

“I suppose.” Jon finished neatening his research notes. “Was there something else you wanted?”

“Yeah,” Tim said brightly. “I’m still a bit new to the area. Where are the good lunch places?”

“There’s a cafe just down—” Jon began, before Tim waved him off.

“That won’t work, I’m afraid, I’m useless with verbal directions,” he said airily. “In one ear, out the other. You’ll have to lead the way.”

Jon stared at him. Tim stared back.

“I have work…” The protest withered on his tongue. “Fine. But I won’t be making a habit of this.”

“Sure,” Tim said brightly.

It was not the first time Jon had ever been wrong about himself. It would not be the last.

#AspecArchives #the magnus archives #jonathan sims #tim stoker #tma fic #fanfiction #tales from the pit

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levis-hazelnut · 3 years

Text

Summary: when you and your best friend, Hanji, were younger, you had made up stories about your dream guys - what they would look like and how you would meet. What happens when the one you had made up appears to be real?

Warning(s): mentions of abuse (if you squint). Please do tell me if there are anymore.

Taglist (closed!): @castellandiangelo

Status: completed!

part 1 > part 2 > part 3

series masterlist

The raven-haired female marched closer to him, digging her index finger into his chest which I smacked off. She gave a dirty look which I countered with the nastiest face I could muster, and she soon turned away from me and crossed her arms, glaring at Eren, who still stood strong. "I'm tired of you, Mikasa. You either cancel our date or avoid me and go cheat on me with some idiot. I can't even use the fingers on my hands to count how many times that has happened. And, another thing, I may have been afraid of you at the start but now, I see no point in that. Your threats mean nothing to me. So, if you dare to try and do anything to any of my friends, especially (Y/N), you'll be sorry that I was the one you chose to mess with." "Wait... Was it her that made you act all rude and like a dickhead to me last year?" I suddenly realised. "Yeah. I'm so sorry about that, (Y/N). But can you keep your words for later, please?" he asked politely and I nodded with an apologetic smile before leaving the living room and going to my room to give them some privacy.

I dropped onto my bed, staring up at the ceiling and thought if it was a good idea to bring Mikasa here. Well, it's too late to stop her now, and I'm doing this for Eren's sake. I just hope that he doesn't end up hating me for the rest of his life if something goes wrong. ~/~ A slam woke me up and I sprang up into a sitting position; my eyes were widened as I looked at my surroundings, seeing that I was in my bedroom. All was silent in my apartment, so I decided to get up from my bed and creep into the living room, only to find Eren sitting on the sofa. His elbows rested on his knees as he pinched the bridge of his nose. His teal orbs were hidden and I slowly approached him, voicing out a small 'hey'. His head tilted up and I gave him an uncertain smile as I sat next to him and draped an arm around his shoulders. "Everything okay?" "Not really. Well, I'm free from the burden of having a girlfriend. But it still feels like I lost something important." "Of course you're going to feel like that. However, you'll soon realise that there's nothing to mope over because you can now enjoy your life without worrying about anything. Other than uni, bills and all that other shit," I added reassuringly. "Do you want hot chocolate or something?" "No. I just want to lie down." I shifted a little away from Eren and patted my lap, wordlessly telling him to rest his head on my lap. He gave me a small smile and laid down on his back with his legs stretched across the sofa, leaning his head on my legs. He covered the top half of his face with an arm and both us remained in silence. Getting bored, I decided to fiddle with Eren's fingers. I leaned down and stuck one of his fingers into my nose, but he didn't even pull away so I put the index finger to his lips. That's when he tried to take his finger out of my grip. I softly laughed at the slight entertainment I earned when I got a reaction from him. "Idiot," he breathed before closing his eyes. "Thanks, hun. I know I'm an idiot." He snorted and then told me to hush so he could relax. I shut up and joined him, once again falling asleep as I tilted my head back to rest against the sofa. My hands still gently gripped one of his as I drifted off into a nap that wouldn't be disturbed until Hanji came home. It's not my fault I stayed up watching Netflix when I knew I had a lecture in the morning... Well, it is my fault, but still. Surprisingly, we weren't woken up even when Hanji had come home. Maybe she was considerate enough to let us sleep, or maybe she knocked out as well. The latter was more likely because she would never be that thoughtful to let me rest properly. Eren and I had fallen asleep at around eleven, and I awakened from my snooze at half-past two. The brunette probably had an early start at work today, which is why he was still asleep when I woke up. His head was still on my thighs so I decided to stay on the sofa instead of moving and waking him up. Luckily, I had my phone on me so I wasn't going to get bored by staring at the black screen of the TV in front of me. "(Y/N)!" "Shh. You're going to wake Eren up," I whisper-yelled to Hanji, who was about to burst our eardrums. "Too late," a gruff voice spoke and I glanced down to see that Eren was awake. I smiled at him before he lidded his beautiful eyes again. "Hi, Hanji, by the way," he muttered. "What's wrong with him?" the female with glasses inquired and I shook my head, telling her that it wasn't something to talk about right now. "So, how was breakfast with Levi~?" "It was nice. He basically knows everything about me, whereas he barely told me anything about himself. Obviously, it's not unusual since we literally just started to get to know each other, but it felt like he was hiding something. And that made me realise that I live my life out loud. Is that a bad thing?" "Only if the person you're talking to is shady," the male stated with his eyes still covered. "So, today, it could be seen as a bad thing." "Eren, let me love him," I whined. "Though, I see why you're concerned." "Did you tell him about Levi?" "Yeah. Because he was working when me and Levi went to the cafe. He saw how comfortable I was around him and decided to question me about it." "(Y/N), I love and care about you. Wouldn't you be the same if someone I created in my brain years ago suddenly appeared out of nowhere?" "Well, when you say it like that, it sounds dodgy." "I'm saying the truth, so he is dodgy. Hanji, back me up." "... I kind of side with (Y/N). Both of her previous relationships didn't work out, so maybe Levi's here to solve that." "Tch!" Eren finally sat up, fed up with the shit that Hanji and I were spewing. "I understand you're thrilled because of the fact that your 'dream guy' has shown up. But how can you trust him right away when you don't even know him? (Y/N), you said yourself that he was hiding something. Please, just don't get yourself into danger by trusting someone you just met." "I'll be fine, Eren. One day, I'll prove to you that I was right to believe in him." "Oh, I got Levi's number, (Y/N)." "Give that to me right now," I squealed and leapt towards Hanji. "Wait." My male best friend stood up and approached Hanji, taking the piece of paper before I could. I pouted at him as he put the paper into his pocket before crossing his arms. "I'll give it to you when my suspicions are gone. Until then, you only speak to him in person and don't tell him your whole life story." "Whatever, Dad," I muttered, resisting the urge to roll my eyes. "Don't get annoyed just because I'm looking out for you," he said with a quieter voice than before. "I used to get irritated because you would constantly interfere with my life, but then I realised you always did it to protect me. I'm doing the same. So, don't blame me when something happens." Even though I was still mildly annoyed at Eren, I brought my arms around him, needing a hug from one of the best people I've met. He looped his arms around my form and drew me closer to him, stuffing his face into my hair. "Awww!" "Hanji, get in here," I said, my lips moving against Eren's clothed chest. I soon felt another person jump into the embrace as I giggled along with the male who lightly laughed. "I love you guys.” "Love you, too. Anyway, I think I'm going to head home. It's been a... troublesome day." "Damn, I almost forgot about that. How are you acting so normal?" "You guys are hiding something from me!" Hanji complained "(Y/N), you can tell her. I'm going to go," Eren announced and pulled away from the group hug. "I'll see both of you soon. Let's go out one day since we haven't in a long time." "Yeah, we should. You can bring Mika--" "Bye," Eren cut her off with a grin as I followed him towards the front door. "... Thank you, Eren." "I'm just returning the favour. Just promise me that you'll keep a distance between you and Mr Hot And Annoying Guy." "I'll try. And he isn't annoying. I love him," I replied just to tease Eren, who frowned. "I'm joking. But seriously, he isn't annoying. Okay, bye, my prince." "Bye, my queen," he smirked. I softly laughed at our stupidity and closed the door before locking it. Just as I was about to turn around, I heard something similar to a horde of rhinos in the corridor, coming towards me. Of course, I knew it was Hanji so I didn't get frightened by it. "Tell me what happened!" "Okay, okay. Let's go sit down." She followed me into the kitchen where I got a snack - a pot of cubed pineapple and a fork - and sat down on a barstool at the kitchen island, starting the story as Hanji sat opposite me on the other side of the island. She never knew about Eren's difficult relationship with Mikasa, so I began with telling her the first problem. And then, about some of the events when she cheated on him, forced him to do things he didn't want to, avoided him, threatened him, and about today. Surprisingly, no words came out of her mouth as she intently listened, sometimes showing shock or concern. "And that's why he cut you off when you were about to tell him to bring Mikasa when we go out," I finished off. "Wow... I thought they were going to last long." "Yeah, because she put on an act. She's a toxic girl, and I'm glad Eren broke up with her." "Why did you never tell me about this?" "Because I'm an amazing friend who doesn't tell others about someone's secret. Anyway, I need to do some work. But first, I'm going to go freshen up since I've looked like a decaying corpse ever since I woke up this morning."

~/~ A loud laugh exited my lips when I witnessed a very angry Levi sit next to me in the lecture hall. He just glared at me as I continued cackling until my stomach hurt and tears pricked the corners of my eyes. A click of the tongue was heard from the male beside me as I started to calm down, wiping away the moisture that resided on my face. "Are you about done, darlin'?" he asked bitterly and I nodded with a grin staining my lips. "Yep... Now, tell me why you're wearing that?" I spoke, stifling another cackle that threatened to leave my lips. He rolled his eyes before responding, "I was having tea on the way to school, with Isabel and Farlan, and some fucking idiot decides to bump into me. I spat some profanities at the idiot since he caused me to drop my tea on my shirt. Luckily, my trousers aren't spoiled. Anyway, I asked Farlan if he had a spare shirt or something in his bag, but he didn't. I didn't want to, but I had to ask Isabel and she said she has a top. She handed it to me with nervousness because it happened to be this - a stupid pink, unicorn t-shirt. I have no idea why she had this of all things in her bag but I had no choice but to wear it even though it's so fucking small and stupid. Please tell me you have a hoodie or a jacket so I can hide it." "Yeah, I have this hoodie." I chucked the black, zip-up hoodie at him after he told his story, which I chuckled at a few times. But damn, because the shirt was small on him, I could really analyse his abs. The fabric outlined his perfectly sculpted form and I just wanted to trace my finger over all the lines. How much does he work out? "Thanks," he mumbled, slipping it on and zipping it up. "No problem, Mr Moody. I'll suffer in the cold for you." "It's not my fault you decided to wear a crop top." "And it's not my fault you spilt tea on yourself." "Well, I'm not going to five lectures today, wearing a unicorn shirt." "Ugh, don't remind me that we have five lectures. I can't wait for this day to be over." "... Oi, darlin'? It looks like that guy wants your attention," Levi pointed out and motioned to behind me, towards rows on the other side of the hall. I turned my head and my eyes met Jean's, who had a smirk on his lips. "Oh my god! Jean!" I exclaimed and sprang out of my seat, pushing past Levi, who blocked my path, and rushed to the brown-haired male, tightly hugging him. "Where were you this whole time? You don't know how much I worried for you! I started to think you died!" I frowned and resisted slapping him across the face for the sudden disappearance. "It's a bunch of stories. And since Professor Mike has just entered, you should take a seat." "You bastard, you're explaining everything to me at lunch." "Yeah, I will. Now, go sit down next to whoever that is." I nodded and quickly went back to the row where I sat with Levi and a couple of other people who minded their own business. He threw me a questioning look, which I acknowledged, but kept silent for a moment as I had my attention on our lecturer. "Jean Kirstein. I've known him since secondary school, where we kind of dated. He's been gone for like a month. No one heard from him during that time and he hadn't told anyone he was going to disappear. People, including myself, literally thought he died," I summed up quietly to answer Levi's wordless inquiry. "I swear, I'm going to punch that smug face of his later." "Hold on... You just said you dated that guy?" "We were fifteen I think, and he asked me out, so I said yeah. Before that, though, he had asked me several times, but I didn't trust him or take him seriously because he's a serious flirt and a dickhead, who I love dearly, no matter what I say about him. Back to the point, we were together for about five months, but we felt like we were forcing it. I don't know, it just didn't feel right to me, so we decided to stay friends. I'm glad we aren't awkward around each other or whatever because I wouldn't want to lose him even though he still flirts with me and pisses me off." "I see..." Levi replied as if pondering about something. "You have some weird friends/friendships." "Oi, I treasure my friends because they are the best I could ask for. Some I met in secondary school, and some I met here. Eren and Hanji are the only ones I've known for the longest. I've been friends with Hanji since I was like four or five, and Eren - since I was nine." Wondering why I'm telling him so much about myself even after Eren's scolding? Basically, since I didn't attempt to keep a distance myself and Levi, Eren decided to barge in again (he doesn't even come to the same university as us and he still somehow interferes). We had another (not small) argument, and I chose to be a bitch about it by talking to Levi and hanging out with him most of the time. But I haven't gotten his number, and we haven't been to each other's house yet since we have only known each other for two weeks and I do think that it's a bit too early for that. I am mature enough to make my own decisions so Eren doesn't need to get involved. "Me and Eren are kind of... dealing with some problems right now. I mean, I want to talk to him, but that means we'll have to talk about the topic of our argument. What if that just makes things worse? He's a great friend, he's been there for me all the time and I don't want to lose him either. And damn, his eyes, I could stare at them all day," I was more mumbling to myself than actually talking to Levi, but I'm pretty sure he still heard me. "And his ass," Levi added quietly, letting a small smirk creep onto his lips. What I learned about Levi was that he doesn't smile or laugh, but he smirks. "But seriously, it sounds like you got a crush on the guy." "Keep your mouth shut, Ackerman. I love him as a friend, nothing more." "What are you arguing about?" he asked, pushing my retort to the side. "Uhh... I would prefer not to share." "Okay." He shrugged and we both decided to focus on the lecture and make notes instead of chatting away. He wasn't the one to stick his nose into other people's business and I was glad about that. ~/~ The sound of skin smacking skin against echoed in the canteen over the voices of students. Jean's head was forced to turn ninety degrees to the left once my hand connected with his.

Hey, I wasn't being violent or rude, don’t worry. He gave me permission to slap him because he knew how angry I would be since he left without saying a word. "Thank you," I muttered and picked up my handmade sandwich. "Do you feel better?" He rubbed his reddening cheek as I nodded. "Yes. Now, explain." "Well, a couple of days before I left, my mum's cousin died. She was really close to him, my mum and her aunt lived near each other when they were younger so my mum and her cousin always used to hang out. They kind of grew apart since they moved away from each other, but still tried to stay in contact. So, we went to Germany to see my mum's family and to attend the funeral." "Oh my god, I'm so sorry. Now, I feel bad for being annoyed with you and slapping you." "Don't worry about it," Jean said, giving me a small smile. "And we were there for a month because my mum decided she wanted to spend as much time as she could with her family. I'm sorry for not saying anything about it or telling you while I was gone. I was so busy and had a lot on my mind." "Yeah, I understand. I'm so sorry. Ugh, I bet you hate me now." "(Y/N), stop stressing over it. I don't hate you," he told me, lightly laughing. "Anyway, what have I missed?" "Not much. People thought you died. Eren broke up with Mikasa. I made some new friends: Levi, Isabel and Farlan and they're all very nice. Eren and I got in an argument and that's about it." "I'm surprised he finally dumped her. And, what happened between you two?" "He's just being overprotective." "And you never are?" "... Kind of. But, he's not letting me do what I want," I pouted like a little child. "I'm sure he's doing it for your own good." "Since when did you decide to side with him?" "When it concerns you." I rolled my eyes and continued eating as we carried on conversing, getting interrupted by a Levi. I looked up at him questioningly as he plopped down in the space next to me. "Where's Isabel and Farlan?" "They both went home since they have no more lectures today." "Aw, so decided to sit with me - your best friend?" I teased as he clicked his tongue and rolled his eyes. "Oh, Jean, this is Levi. And Levi, this is Jean." "Hi," the raven curtly spoke as Jean responded more politely. I was about to speak up but my phone's buzzing prevented me from doing that. I fished it out of my pocket and answered it. "(Y/N)?" "Yes?" I replied with uncertainty since I haven't gotten a call from him in a week. "Are you still at uni?" "Yeah, why?" This time, I spoke more confidently. "When do you finish?" "I have one more lecture." "Okay. Can you meet me at the cafe after your lecture?" "Why?" "I want to talk to you." "... Sure. Bye." I sighed and ended the call as the two males I sat with looked at me in question. "None of your b--" I was cut off when my phone rang again and I answered it. "Hey. What do you want, Hanji?" "Could you get some snacks on the way home?" "Please don't tell me you invited people over." "Hey, they're your friends as well. Most of them are, anyway." "I'm not in the mood for people right now. And I'm meeting Eren at the cafe after. So, since you're inviting them, go get the stuff yourself." "But I'm home, I don't want to go out again." I huffed. "What time did you tell them to come over?" "At around seven." "Fine. I'll get whatever you want, just send me a list." "Okay. Thank you so much, (Y/N)!" "Whatever. I'll see you later." "Bye!" "I never got an invite," Jean fakely whined. "Yeah, because she probably thinks you're dead. She hasn't seen you yet." "Oh, yeah. Can I come, though?" "You ask her. I'm sure she'll be happy," I told him before looking at Levi who was about to speak up. "Don't even think about it, Ackerman. I don't want you stalking me." "I wasn't going to ask if I could come. I was going to--" "Hey, Levi~" All three heads turned to a group of girls who stood behind me and Levi. I immediately rolled my eyes since I knew why they were here - they wanted the oh so charming Levi to notice them and try and get a date with him. He's only been here for two weeks and he's like a freaking celebrity. "Hi..." "Are you free later?" "No, sorry. I'm... going bowling with (Y/N)." I briefly frowned before morphing it into a smile to the girls whose eyes lingered on me. Oh, how jealous they were. "Oh, that's sad. We probably could have done something better. Maybe another time." "Yeah, sure, whatever." The three girls walked away, making sure to give me a dirty look, and I lightly punched Levi's arm. "Hey, don't bring me into this. I don't want people hating on me just because I hang out with you. Just give those bitches what they deserve and straight-up reject them. Unless, of course, you want them to be all over you." "I do not want them all over me, but I don't want to 'straight-up reject them' because that's... rude." I scoffed tauntingly. "I never knew you cared about others' feelings." "Well, you've only known me for a couple of weeks. You either have good judgment or just jump to conclusions." "The first one. Jumping to conclusions, which I don't do, causes problems." "What about the time--" "Shut your mouth, Jean." "That will be difficult if I'm kissing you." I playfully rolled my eyes and a smile remained on my lips as I lightly kicked his shin under the table. The table was silent for a minute so I decided to check the time, noticing that we have to get to our last lecture in a few minutes. There was no rush so we chose to stay sitting and just relax before flooding our brains with gibberish. ~/~ "(Y/N)." I slightly shifted in my seat to turn around upon hearing my name. There stood my (male) best friend who gave me a little smile before sitting down in the chair opposite me. He noticed the iced tea placed on the table in front of him and his smile slightly widened as I sipped on my coffee before leaving it on the wooden surface. "What did you want to talk about?" I inquired. "I'm sorry for--" "You don't need to apologise. I've done the same thing to you but you somehow put up with me. I'm sorry for not listening to you even though you're just caring about me. And, since I was angry with you, Levi sort of knows my whole life story..." I confessed as Eren sighed and leaned back in his chair, taking a sip of his beverage. "But, we haven't exchanged numbers or told each other where we live." "Good. I'm going to give Levi another two weeks before making my judgment. Only then will I give you his number." "... I missed talking to you. Sorry about everything." It's not only your fault. I get that you don't want someone to mess with your life." "And I might just hold back a little on barging into your life." "I'm actually glad you got involved, to be honest. I would still be controlled by Mikasa if it wasn't for you." I gave him a wink and a grin. We stayed there for about an hour, just talking and laughing before we decided to head home. Even though he would have to go home in the opposite direction, he walked me home. It wasn't even dark either so I scolded him for wasting time but he brushed it off with a grin and rested his arm over my shoulders. "Oh, shit," I whispered and Eren questioned what happened. "Hanji asked me to get some things for her since she's organised a party of sorts that I don't want to be there for." "Oh, yeah, she invited me, but I didn’t feel like going,” he told me as I abruptly changed our route. "And since you don't want to be there, why don't we drop off her things and leave? We could do something since it's Friday and we have nothing to do." "Hm. I don't mind. Where do you want to go?" "Don't know. Wherever our feet take us." He shrugged. "Okay, let's do that, then." After getting whatever was on Hanji’s list, we dropped it off before promptly leaving. And then, Eren and I had mindlessly walked around until we found ourselves at a bowling alley. "Oh, (Y/N)!" a shrill voice called, catching my attention as I took a sip of my slushie and watched Eren throw a bowling ball down the lane, knocking down seven of the pins. He turned around and I smiled at him, knowing he wouldn't be happy. I could tell he was forcing back a scowl as he approached me and the other three: Isabel, Farlan and Levi.

#levi ackerman #levi x reader #levi ackerman x reader #aot #aot fanfiction #aot imagines #snk #snk fanfiction #snk imagines #attack on titan #shingeki no kyoujin #reader insert #x reader #anime #dream guy #modern au #series #i need to see a pic of levi in a unicorn shirt pls ty

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laventae · 3 years

Text

Serendipity

Summary: You accidentally bump into Suna once, then a second time, then a third time.... before it starts seeming like fate has already decided its course for the both of you.

Pairings: Suna Rintaro x F!reader

Genre: Mostly fluff, College/Uni au

Word count: 3.4k words

Part: 1 , (2) , (3) , (TBC)

(A/N: I suck at writing summaries but anyways. This is/was supposed to be part of my [HQ Boys - Pretending to be your boyfriend] series, but I really wanted to make this slightly longer than my usual one-shots. Also, this story will probably have every cheesy trope you know, so, proceed with caution and I’m sorry. I couldn’t help myself.)

THUD

‘Okay, what the fuck is going on?’ you think as you slowly try to open your eyes.

Looking at your bedside table, you reach for your phone and check the time

7:35 A.M

‘Ugh... it’s too early for this shit...’ you think as you yawn.

You remember your shift at work starts at about 9 a.m., so you decide to sleep for a bit longer.

You place your phone back down on your bedside table, and turn in bed, covering your face with a pillow.

THUD

“Goddammit, what’s going on outside?!” you exclaim, getting out of your bed and heading for the front door.

You open the door hastily, and find your landlord standing in the hallway of your apartment building, then notice multiple moving boxes scattered around, and movers talking some of the boxes into the apartment opposite yours.

You’re both startled when you open the door, but she softens as soon as she notices it was you.

“Good morning, Mrs. Saito. What’s going on?” you ask her sleepily.

“Goodness, I’m sorry they woke you up as well, sweetheart. The new tenant told me they were moving in today but I didn’t know the movers were coming this early and causing this much of a ruckus!” she exclaims, looking like she was just as annoyed by the noise as you were.

“Well, the new tenant certainly didn’t make a good first impression, huh?” you say, trying to lighten the mood.

She chuckles softly, “I guess not. They’re not even here yet, so I’m just going to have to stay here until the movers are done” she sighs.

“Want me to make you a cup of coffee?”

“Oh, that’s alright, sweetheart, you should go back in and try to get some more sleep” she says, waving you back into your apartment.

You try to insist, but you feel too tired. Instead, you just nod and go back in, closing the door behind you.

Sighing, you head to your bedroom again; you figure you should try to get a bit more sleep in before you actually start getting ready for work.

-~-~-

After tossing and turning in bed for a couple of minutes, the noise wouldn’t get any quieter, so you thought you might as well get out of bed and head to your part-time job a bit earlier than usual.

You start getting ready, and make a quick cup of coffee to give Mrs. Saito on your way out. She thanks you and you go on your way.

When you first moved into your apartment about 2 years ago, you were able to find a pretty decent part-time job working as a barista at coffee shop nearby. It was only about two blocks away from where you lived, so it was super convenient; and a plus point, you were never late.

Checking your phone again, you notice the time

8:35 A.M

“It’s still so early...” you yawn as you take out your headphones and play some music to listen to while you walk to the coffee shop, talking your time.

After about 15 minutes of enjoying your morning walk, and window shopping on the stores along the way, you reach your destination and open the front door.

“Goodmorning, y/n!” you hear your boss call out to you as soon as you enter, “Early as usual, I see”

You chuckle as you head in his direction, “Oh, you know me, always excited to get to work!” you joke.

He laughs, “Yesterday was your last day of your second Uni semester, wasn’t it?” he asks you.

“Yeah, made it out in one piece thankfully”

He laughs again, “I’m sure you did well, I've seen how stressed out you’ve been about it but I also know how hard you’ve been studying, don’t worry” he assures you as he points to the chairs in the shop, silently asking you to help him out with setting them up.

“How do you know that?” you sigh, grabbing a few chairs and setting them down.

He stops what he’s doing and looks at you, “You think I didn’t notice the dark circles you kept coming in with, during every shift, for the past couple of weeks?”

“Was it that obvious?” your eyes widen.

“Definitely” he answers and you both laugh.

After setting up the last few chairs, your boss speaks up again, “Alright, why don’t you head in and get ready, I’ll just be out here setting up the register before we open in a couple of minutes”.

You nod and walk back to the staff locker area.

-~-~-

The day goes by slowly, as usual, and after a few hours, you take your break and head to the staff room locker area to relax and have a (late) breakfast.

‘I really need this right now’ you sigh as you take a sip of your coffee, feeling more tired than usual, and blame it on having to wake up super early that morning.

You check your phone and notice a text message.

1 NEW MESSAGE

You open it.

FROM ‘Wifeyy <3’: “Heyy! Call me when you're on your break!”

You smile and shake your head, dialing up her number.

It rings a couple of times before your best friend picks up.

“Hey y/n!!” she yells excitedly

“Hey Hina,” you laugh, “What’s up?”

“Just wanted to remind you that we are going out tonight to celebrate my birthday, you still remember, right?”

“Oh, was that today?” you joke

“Y/N!!!”

“I’m kidding, I'm kidding, you know I'll be there” you shake your head

“Good! I'll also be inviting some of my friends from Uni, but I want us to hangout still. It’s been a while since we’ve actually caught up. And I'm finally gonna be able to come to your city!”

The both of you actually met during your first year in University through mutual friends. Even though you both were in different majors, you hit it off right away. And after that, the both of you always tried to make time to hang out, whether it was between classes, during lunch breaks, or whenever the both of you had the time.

However, it was sometimes hard to meet up during weekends, since she lived in the city next to yours, so whenever she had the chance to come to your city, or you were able to go to hers, you guys would always spend it together.

“Yeah, I guess with exams and all it was hard for us to actually see each other”

“Exactly, anyways I’m excited for tonight!”

“Yeah, me too..!”

“Hey, do you sound more tired than usual, or is it just me?” she asks you, sounding worried.

“Oh, it’s nothing, I just woke up super early today, not willingly though” you sigh, “don't even ask, I'll tell you about it later”

“Alright... if you say so”

“Anyways, I gotta get back to work now, so, I’ll see you tonight, okay?”

“Alright! Dress sexy, okay? You promised we would dress up!”

“Yeah, yeah, I'll try my best” you both laugh before hanging up.

-~-~-

It was about 5 p.m when you finally reach your house, after leaving your part-time job, and finishing up some outdoor chores you had for the day.

You sigh as you get off the elevator to your floor.

You notice the empty hallway as you walk to your apartment; you suppose that the movers were already done and have left at this point.

You glance over to the door opposite yours at the end of the floor’s hallway.

‘I wonder if they're home yet...’ you think before you unlock the door of your apartment and go in.

You sigh as you place your groceries and bag on your kitchen island and start putting everything away.

You were supposed to meet Hina later tonight, at around 7 p.m, to celebrate her birthday. That meant you had a couple more hours to spend at home, so you decide to make some lunch/dinner and watch a movie on Netflix.

-~-~-

“Hey Hina, I’ll just go outside and answer this call real quick alright?” you try to call out to your friend as you get out of your chair, but she looks at you confused, the music playing loudly in the pub and the bustling of the people inside made it hard for her to hear your voice from across the table.

You point to your phone, and as realization hits her, she nods.

You attempt to make your way out of the pub, trying to worm between the people inside and make your way to the door. However, you suddenly run into someone before you reach the door, and accidentally drop their drink.

“I’m so sorry!” you tell them, looking up and noticing it was an old man, long white hair settling over his shoulders.

He looks annoyed at first but then his face relaxes when he sees you.

“I can pay for the drink!” you tell him apologetically.

“Oh, that’s alright, gorgeous, it was just a mistake” he answers you, smiling.

‘Okay...’ you think as you get a weird feeling in your gut.

“Would you like me to buy you-”

“Okay, Bye” you cut him off, smiling awkwardly, feeling uncomfortable with the way he was looking at you; you reach for the door and leave the pub.

It suddenly gets much quieter, and you feel yourself relax, finally being able to breathe.

Honestly, you didn’t really get a call from anyone, you were just feeling tired, and wanted to take a break from all the noise.

You check the time on your phone,

11:54 P.M

You sigh, ‘I wanna go back home...’

It’s not that you weren’t having fun with Hina and her friends, but you were frankly not that close with them, and even though they are all very nice, having to be social for a long time takes a toll on your mental and physical strength sometimes.

Startled, you turn around when you hear the door of the pub open again behind you.

“Hey,” you hear Hina say as she approaches you, “is everything okay?”

“Yeah sorry, that was just my mom checking up on me” you lie to her, putting your phone back in your bag.

She nods, but you know she's slightly suspicious of your answer as she eyes you carefully

“You tired?” she asks you.

You chuckle nervously, ‘well, that didn’t take long’.

“Yeah, I'm really sorry, it’s getting late and it’s kind of been a long day”

She chuckles, “It’s okay, I thought your battery might have run out by now”

You couldn’t help but chuckle as well. Then you look at her apologetically.

“Yeah, I think I might head home for the night, is that alright with you?” you ask her, feeling bad you couldn’t stay longer.

She laughs and goes in to hug you goodbye, “You know it’s fine, I’m just glad I got to see you today! But, promise me we would hangout together again soon?”

You sigh, relieved, “you know I'd cancel any plans I have, just to see you” you shake your head as you hug her back.

“And promise me you’ll think about that date I wanna set you up on” she giggles as you both let go.

“Yeah, yeah, I'll think about it” you reply, used to her trying to set you up on these blind dates that you don’t necessarily really want to go to.

“Alright. You want me to call you a cab or walk you home?” she asks as you turn around and start leaving.

“No! It’s fine, my house is literally a couple of blocks away, go back! Have fun!” you say assuring her, and waving her to go back and hangout with her friends.

“Are you sure, y/n?”

“Yess! Go!” you tell her, and turn back around, walking away again.

-~-~-

After walking for a few minutes, you notice how quiet it was outside, except for the few open pubs you passed by earlier. I mean, it wasn’t really a huge surprise, it was getting pretty late, and almost all stores in the area were closed at that point. But, because you weren’t usually out that late at night all alone, it somehow made it feel even emptier and quieter.

You look up at the sky as you walk on the sidewalk and notice a few stars scattered along the night sky. It makes you smile and you close your eyes and take a deep breath.

‘I wonder how many of those are actually just satellites...’ you think to yourself as you open your eyes, and you can’t help but let out a small chuckle.

You feel your phone vibrate and notice you got a text message.

1 NEW MESSAGE

You open it.

FROM ‘Wifeyy <3’: “Heyy! Text me when you get home safe!”

You smile as you read the message, but then feel a sudden chill down your spine.

‘Weird...’

You put your phone down and suddenly start hearing faint footsteps behind you.

‘Alright, that’s fine... it’s just someone walking home as well’ you try to assure yourself but can’t help but still feel anxious.

After a few minutes, you still hear the foot steps behind you, slowly getting closer. That, somehow, making you feel more anxious.

‘I’m just overthinking this right?’

You try to increase your pace, to check if they really were following you. Even if they weren’t, you hope to try and lose them all together. It didn’t help that the way to your apartment would be to keep walking straight, and the alleys around the buildings on the way were blocked off at the ends, not making it any safer for you to try and find a way around.

But then you hear the person behind you increase their pace as well.

‘Fuck’ you think, feeling scared and panicked, ‘they're definitely following me, aren’t they?’

You panic as you think of what to do next, then decide to take out your phone and call someone.

‘Who the fuck do I call? Hina? The police? I-’

Your thoughts are interrupted when you hear someone yell something from the sidewalk on the other side of the street you were walking on.

Your head snaps to where the voice came from and you notice a guy running up to you, “Babe?”

You try to back away before the boy reaches you, but, “I’ve been waiting for you, what took you so long?” he asks, pulling you in for a hug.

“I don’t know yo-!”

“Someone’s following you” he whispers in your ear before letting you complete your sentence.

Your heart stops when you hear him say that and you begin to feel your eyes tear up.

He pulls away, looking at you, and you suddenly notice you stopped hearing the footsteps coming from behind you.

You look back and see a man standing in the middle of the street, your eyes widen when you notice his long white hair.

‘That’s the fucking creepy old guy from the pub, I knew he seemed off!’

“My name is Suna. I was just in that supermarket over there, on the other side of the street, when I noticed him following you” he tells you quietly, as he subtly points at a store behind him. You look over his shoulder and notice a small, old looking supermarket, with an ‘Open 24/7′ neon light flickering over it. “Do you want me to walk you back home?” the boy asks you, and your eyes snap back to him.

You’re then able to see him much clearer, his pale, yellow eyes looking into yours. He had a blank expression on his face but you could hear a hint of worry in his voice.

You feel a tear roll down your cheek and you hesitantly nod at him.

“It’s okay, it’s okay, I'm here” you hear him say as he puts an arm around you, pulling you closer, and walks with you in the direction you were originally going in.

After a few moments, you hear the footsteps behind you, again, but this time they started to sound more distant, as if the creepy, old guy was walking away.

Your heart starts calming down a bit as you both walk silently for a few minutes.

You then feel the boy remove his arm from around you and you slightly stumble.

‘Was he supporting me this whole time..?’ you think to yourself as you try to steady yourself back on your own feet.

He turns around, “I’m sure he’s gone by now” he tells you, looking back at you.

You turn around to check as well, and feel yourself finally be able to breathe again when you don’t see anyone behind you. You look back at the boy and nod.

“You live around here?” he asks you and you finally notice where you were.

Realizing you were only about a block away from your house, you stop.

“What?” the boy asks as he turns around to face you, when he realizes you weren't walking next to him anymore.

“This is me” you answer quickly, pointing to a random building you were standing in front of.

He was nice enough to help you back there, so, it's not that you weren’t thankful, but you were still feeling a bit anxious, and you didn’t want to take any chances.

“Oh,” the boy says, looking up at the building you pointed to, then looks back to you, “I'll watch you go in” he continues, putting his hands in his pockets.

“Oh, uhm, okay..” you nervously say, turning to the building.

‘Shit... I hope the entrance door isn’t locked...’

You reach for the door and push it.

‘Oh, thank god...’ you sigh, relieved.

You quickly turn back to look at him again, and notice his eyes following you.

“Thank you”

He just nods at you, a blank expression still on his face.

You get inside the building and the door closes behind you. You weren’t sure if he was looking so you make your way to the elevators. You pretend you pressed a button, hoping he stopped looking at you through the glass door at that point.

You look behind you and notice he wasn’t there anymore, so you run slowly towards the door and see him walking away.

You place a hand on your heart, and sigh again. You close your eyes and take a few deep breaths.

‘Why does it feel like it’s been a really long night...?’

You decide to wait for a few minutes, making sure he wouldn’t still be around the area when you try to run to where you actually lived. It was probably a couple of buildings away so, if you make a quick run for it, you think, you would definitely make it.

You open the glass door slowly and take a quick peak around the street.

‘Nobody’s here...’

You take a quick breath before you make a run for it.

As you thought, it easily took you a minute or two to get to your building. You quickly push the entrance door and run to elevators.

As soon as it arrives, you get in and press the floor you lived on.

A few moments pass before the elevator doors open and you can't help but breathe a sigh of relief as you’re welcomed with your usual empty, but now comforting hallway.

You step out and head for your apartment when you notice someone standing at the door opposite yours at the end of that hallway, trying to unlock it.

‘Oh, it’s probably the new tenant...’ you think as you walk to your door.

It was pretty silent so you decide to at least welcome them, hoping it would make the awkward silence less... awkward.

“Hey,” you say turning to face them when you get to your door, “You’re the new tenant, righ-” but you quickly stop and your eyes widen when the person turns around to face you.

‘Wait, isn’t he the guy that just walked me back ‘home’??’

He still carried a blank expression on his face, but you notice his eyes slightly widen when he notices who you were as well.

‘Fuck, Fuck, Fuck... What do I say?’ you panic as you both stand there, looking at each other.

“Oh, you live here?” he breaks the silence, sounding pretty calm.

“Oh, yeah,” you say turning around and quickly unlock your door and go in, “Goodnight!” you yell, panicked.

You accidentally make eye contact with him one last time before you swiftly close the front door, leaving him there, looking blankly at your apartment door instead.

‘He’s my new neighbor??’

(HQ Masterlist)

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uzuitengensfourthwife · 3 years

Text

Roommate (Suguru Daishou x fem!Reader) College AU

Warnings: some teasing, my bad writing but other than that none

Word count: 2371

Authors note: and this too was written back in October LKADNHDJF Im so sorry but this just had to be posted here at some point, so why not now? *proceeds to lip bite* Anyways lmao skdnnf I think suguru is so damn underrated and he isnt even as bad as people might think he is so yeah, here is my oh so badly written suguru fanfic. Enjoy!!

(2 months ago)

It was Friday evening, a day you and your roommate usually binge-watched movies and series, but not today. The sudden change in plans was a change you didn't want. After all, the change of plans meant helping your roommate to pack his stuff and help him bring it into his new Unit. A Unit that was far away from his previous one and it made you feel dejected. You wouldn't be able to see him that often anymore and for once you grew close to someone outside of Japan.

, Ow c'mon Y/N. Don't be sad. I bet your new roommate will be nice as well.'' You let out a grown as you let yourself fall down on your bed. , Yeah but he's not you and you're like my only friend here in the Unit.'' Christian let out a chuckle and then suddenly got up from his kneeling position, getting his backpack and suitcase. , Well, you'll be alright, '' he threw some of his last stuff in his backpack. ,,After all my new Unit isn't even that far away.'' - ,,Christian, what is 'not far away' about 30 fucking minutes?'' you huffed in annoyance, sitting up again death glaring your 'ex' roommate. His laugh filled up the room as he threw his backpack over his shoulder, it was time for him to go, and then again you felt miserable. You wanted him to stay, but it was his decision after all. After two full years with Christian you knew you weren't the reason why he left, he left for other plausible reasons.

,, Alright let me help you then.'' You announced, grabbing one of his bags opening the door for him. A smile was plastered across his face as he walked past you with all his belongings. Letting out a last sigh you followed him, hoping your future roommate would be as subtle as Christian...

After helping Christian carrying and unpacking his stuff in his new Unit, you just made it back to your Unit. You were tired and felt like a piece of shit. Christian was one of the only people you interacted with on campus and the only one in your unit. The rest of your friends attended Universities in Japan, mostly in Tokyo or Osaka, just the minimum was somewhere outside of Japan, including you. Moreover, it was hard for you to find friends since you lacked in social skills. And having a new roommate would totally throw you off, you didn't even know how you wanted to welcome him, you were just too socially awkward for this.

So when you finally opened the door to your little 'apartment' and discovered a new pair of shoes next to all of your shoes, you freaked out. He was already here and you literally had nothing to offer him. Not even goddamn chewing gum. This would most definitely turn into some second hand embarrasment, you were sure about it. You closed the door when you suddenly heard footsteps slowly coming your way. ,,I'm really sorry that I just barged in but you weren't here so I let myself in.'' There he was, standing in front of you. You recognised him right away. Suguru Daisho, the high school rival of a friend of yours. ,,Well well, if that isn't our Miss Nekoma Manager, Y/N it is, right?'' he leaned onto to wall, giving you one of his smug smirks.

,,Of all people, it really just had to be you, huh?'' you spat out ironically, slipping out of your shoes as you walked up to him. ,,Ouch Y/N, you hurt my heart.'' Letting out a fake sob, he touched his chest and tried to look as hurt as possible which made you sigh out in annoyance, so you walk past him showing no reaction. ,,Jesus, you're no fun.'' - ,, Never intended to be fun, especially when it comes to you.'' As you replied to his complaint, you just plopped down on the little couch, already missing Christian. You really were so close to just change units as well. It hadn't even been 5 minutes yet, but here you are already considering to move out. What an awful day you had. And your next years in Uni would get even worse with him as your roommate.

But things turned out quite differently.

You imagined living with Suguru must be the most annoying thing ever, but you were so wrong. First, you really thought he was just trying to get on your sweet side and then act like an asshole again, but you started to reconsider when he brought home some chocolates for you. It wasn't just that, no he did so much more for you, and all of that in just two months.

He cooked for you, whenever he had time. When you woke up every morning, there was breakfast on the table. He helped you with studying and kept his distance whenever he knew you needed some time for yourself. And most importantly, he never invited friends over, since it didn't take him long to find out you just couldn't interact with people. Of course his teasing side would come out sometimes, leaving some comments here and there, but he changed and not only by a bit no, he changed a lot and even for the better.

Living with him was easier than you thought.

And yet, yet the old things would obviously come back because today you wanted to tell Kuroo, who was and still is one of your best friends from high school, that Suguru was your roommate. God, you were nervous. You knew Kuroo has always hated him and he will most definitely not stop hating him, even despite the fact that you grew quite close to him.

So when you pressed the 'call' button on your laptop, you really just didn't want to tell him, but you had to. Even if you wouldn't tell him now, he would find out somehow. You really wanted to tell him in person, rather than him finding out and then getting mad at you as well.

Once his faced showed up on your screen you smiled and waved, shoving away the nervousness you just had. ,,Hey Hey Tets!'' - ,,Hey! How're you doing over there?'' he smiled, taking a sip from the cup wich was located right next to him. ,,Well Im doing pretty good! How're you and the boys doing?'' Kuroo's face turned dark, making you worry, but once you've heard his answers you couldn't have expected less from such an idiot as him. ,,Well we're all doing pretty good.... and yet I feel broken, Kenma's ignoring me once again.'' He sobbed ironically, making you smile in an instant. You had to admit it, you missed the old times. The time you guys were still in Highschool, enjoying life and just having fun. But over all you just missed your friends, you always see them hanging out with each other, going on trips together while you were stuck with boredom and nothing but schoolwork. Of course your friends were part of the University life as well, however it seemed like they had much more time than you. Less worries than you.

,,You know Tets... I miss you guys a lot.'' You whispered as you nervously played with a stuffed animal, that was standing right next to your laptop. Showing affection wasn't really your thing, yet you missed your group of friends way too much to just ignore it like that. ,,Awe Y/N, we miss you too! Once you're back we're definitely going out somewhere! Oh and you should bring Christian as well!! Come to think of it.... where is Christian?''

You chocked on your saliva. ,,Oh god are you okay?'' Kuroo worriedly stated as you coughed. Why now, you had nearly forgotten about it, and yet all of the good had to come to an end. So when you finally stopped coughing you assured your friend that you were okay, but you most definitely weren't okay, you didn't even know where to start. You couldn't possibly just go ,,Ah yeah forgot to tell you, but Christian changed units. Suguru and I are now roommates.'.There was no way you could tell him. Literally no way.

But while you were overthinking this whole situation, suddenly Suguru made his entry.

,,Eyo Y/N can you-'' - ,, What is he doing here?'' Kuroo frantically yelled as he regocnised Suguru, pointing at him through your screen. Great, you thought. This could've gone better if you had the guts to bring it up earlier, but of course your friend had to find out like this. Luck was definetily not on your side today. ,,Oi roosterhead, still lying about your height huh?'' Suguru smirked as he placed himself right behind you, moving closer to the laptop. ,,Get lost.''Kuroo scoffed and now looked at you while still pointing at Suguru. ,,Why's he here?'' he repeated himself, not leaving you out of his sight once. Yet you looked away, trying to avoid his gaze as much as possible, you would even prefer hiding behind Suguru than sitting here. ,,He's my new roommate... Christian changed units.'' You whispered slowly looking back to see if he was still watching you.

Suguru took his chance and moved closer to you as he purred. ,,Wait, you didn't tell him babe?'' Oh god you forgot the petnames he had for you and you hated him for using them on you now. After he moved in and you finally got along pretty well, he started with all these ridiculous pet names, just like honey. And oh god...this was definitely not going to end well.

,,Can you tell him to fucking leave?'' Kuroo asked, seemingly annoyed of your roommates presence. ,,Alright alright I'll leave, just don't forget our business later.'' and with that he left your room.

The sudden awkward silence that was between you and your best friend was more than just uncomfortable for you. In fact, you hated it, you just wanted to disappear. ,,How long?'' He was the first one to finally break the silence and you knew he was upset, after all Suguru just walked in and you didn't tell him at all. ,,Two months..'' you whispered, full of regret. Kuroo then sighed, hand on his forehead as he leaned back to process what he has just heard. ,,Two months? God.... why didn't you tell me?'' - ,, Listen I was scared.... I know you don't like him but we got along so well..'' you stuttered, trying to avoid his gaze again. Honestly you were scared. All this time you were scared that you might lose your friend, although this might be a stupid reason to end a friendship, you were still terrified.

,,Hey that's fine Y/N, liking each other and having a relationship is fine! Im not even mad I promise!'' You looked at him as he smiled, to let you know that it was fine. All you could do was smile back and be thankful that he wasn't mad at you. ,,Oh and we're not really in a relationship..'' You stated and let out a nervous giggle. Kuroo on the other hand leaned in closer and then whispered. ,,Yeah right hon.'' - ,,Kuroo.'' You warned, holding up your finger just as you were about to scold him. ,,Anyways, seems like you have some unfinished business with the snake, so go for it.'' You huffed, ready to protest that there was no business to finish, but before you could tell him otherwise he disappeared from you screen.

Sighing out in annoyance, you got up from your chair to go scold your roommate for his bold words he has spoken during your videocall. So when you saw him doing some schoolwork you seated yourself in front of him, death glaring him. ,,Just what exactly were you thinking?''you hissed in such a sharp tone, that even suguru backed off for a second. But he quickly collected himself and leaned in closer just to smirk at you. ,,What do you mean babe?" he asked, his voice soft and unbothered. You groaned again, leaning in closer as well. ,,He thinks we have a thing." - ,,So?" his reply was bold, just like as if he didn't care about your current situation at all, which was weird to you since he usually never acted or talked to you this way.

You answered him, voice quiet. ,,So you're just going to leave it there?''

The confusion was plastered all over his face. You didn't really know what left him so confused, but you needed answers and as for that you waited for an answer. ,,Wait wait wait.'' he said, holding up both his hands. ,,Is that disappointment I hear?'' - ,,Never.'' You leaned back, looking away and thinking how to continue this conversation, which obviously seemed pointless to your roommate. But it wasn't pointless to you, your friend literally just hung up on you just because of this stupid statement the guy in front of you had made. ,,Why did you say these things? What did you even mean by unfinished business? That's not appropri-'' you got cut off midsentence. ,,We still haven't decided what we wanted to cook this weekend. That's what I meant babe.'' he stated, as he held up a paper with an amused expression.

,Oh' you mouthed, sitting there in embarrassment as you tried to avoid his gaze. The embarrassment just grew bigger as you realised what you were actually thinking about.

,,Well well, it's okay to have these thoughts about me. But next time you might as well share them with me.'' His grin grew bigger, putting down the paper he just lifted up a second ago. That's it, you thought, he has crossed the line. You then suddenly stood up, cheeks flushing red as you huffed out in annoyance once again. ,,You're the worst.'' you muttered, stomping away to your room in an instant, shutting your door. But something was odd. No, you... you felt something odd happening to you.

You then realised your fastened heartbeat, your hot cheeks, still flushed in a light pink shade,you...you were confused.

Just.... what... what was this feeling?

#daishou suguru #haikyu x reader #suguru x reader #daishou x y/n #haikyuu!!#suguru daisho x reader #daishou fluff #daishou #suguru #suguru daishō #haikyuu

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writingsfromhome · 3 years

Text

Bad Timing IV

A/N: To all the soft hearted crybabies requesting it: here’s part 4 to dry your tears from part 3. Thanks for all the interaction with this series, you guys are the best! <3<3<3<3

Part 1 / Part 2 / Part 3 / Part 4

---------------------------------------------------

I take my coffee to the little patio in the backyard of my childhood home, breathing deeply. It was a couple weeks since the traumatic incident at the bank, the one where I nearly died and found a way to live again. The higher ups practically begged me to take paid leave, I had a feeling they just didn’t want me to take anything to court. I’d told them I would take the month, and knew I would hand in my resignation thereafter. I enjoyed my job as much as the next person but it was too much for me. It felt like closing a door on a chapter of my life that I wanted to move on from.

And now, I could truly relax, I wasn’t running away from anything for the first time in my life. After everything that happened in that small restroom at the back of the bank, Harry and I came to a peace. And I’d only moved on from there.

“You’re up early,” my dad comes into view, a cup of tea in hand. “Your flight doesn’t leave until tonight right?”

“Yeah, just thought I would appreciate the views before I go back to a city,” I move my feet off the chair so he could sit.

“You can come here anytime.”

“I know,” I wrap my hands around my mug. “Coming here it just...reminds me of mum. And it’s hard...”

“This is how I stay connected to her,” he pats the table between us. “She loved this place, her garden and those darn birds she fed all the time.”

“You feed them now,” I look to the birdfeeder filled lovingly to the brim with seeds.

“I do it because...” he says quietly. “It’s what she would want.”

I think about my mum, what she would want. It hurt when I thought about how she left me, married and happy in love. And then how much hurt I went through, always wishing she was there. In some way I know she knew--wherever she was. But I wish I could hear her, I wish I could have a love like she had.

“So, when do I get to meet this new boy of yours?” My dad asks.

“Dad, you know his name’s Alec.”

“I would if I met him, put a face to the name.”

I roll my eyes, my dad was a bit overprotective after everything that’s happened in my life. I think he felt guilty in a small way, him and Harry always got on--we teased them about their bromance. He was just as blindsided as me. But I’d told my dad everything that happened the first night I came over. He hadn’t judged, just listened, hugged me tightly, and left to make me a cup of tea. That was the most expressive my dad got.

After Alec took me back from from the hospital, I asked him to stay. And he had stayed since, making it official from casual to dating. It was scary but life was too short to hold back I had learned. I had to hold onto a good thing when I had one.

As for Harry, he hadn’t called me since that day he visited me. I’d left him a couple texts--when I was discharged home, and again to ask him how he was doing a week later. He’d sent a thumbs up and that was it. I thought we were okay, but he blew me off even when I tried to call him. It hurt a little, but I’d been so busy packing and getting on, that I let him be for now. I would wait until after visiting my sister to find out where his head was at.

H’s POV

It’s been nearly a month since I walked out of Y/N’s hospital room, and we’d just about tied all the lose ends from the case. The only thing about it all that lingered on my mind was Y/N. I missed her more than I had all these years apart, but I sat in the ache of wanting. It was time I catch up to the consequences of my past actions. I turned to writing, starting again after years of thinking I no longer had a passion for it. It felt freeing.

She’d texted me, called me too. I tried not to respond even though everything in me wanted to pick up the phone and ask her out to dinner, invite her over for a movie, ask her if she wanted to take my car and drive out somewhere like we used to after exams in uni. But I let her be, imagining that she was happy somewhere. With Alec, or whoever she wanted to be with.

The last thing I expect, is for her to be standing outside my station late Thursday night.

“Y/N?” I almost don’t recognise her. Gone was her stern bun and smart suit. Strands of her hair frame her face, like a piece of art on display. She has on a loose jumper and tights, a bum bag strapped across her chest that she roots through for something.

“Harry!” she drops her hands. “I’ve only been waiting here for...20 minutes, when your receptionist said your shift ended?”

“I had to finish up some paperwork. Why didn’t you call me?.”

“It’s not like you would’ve answered.” her hands on her hips, attitude dripping from every inch of her. “You’ve been avoiding me.”

“You look different,” I dodge the topic.

“I know,” she zips up her bag. “I had the month off, officially resigned today. I have absolutely nowhere to be. So I’m looking the part.”

“It looks good,” I say truthfully. She looked relaxed, like the Y/N I used to know. “You quit your job?”

“I had enough of that bank,” she shrugs. “I went to see my dad for a bit, and visited my sister. She’s doing well.”

“Ah,” I was glad she’d taken a break. She was glowing. “Seriously Y/N, you look really good.”

“You,” she points her finger at me. “Are not allowed to say things like that after ghosting me. I thought we...came to an understanding. You left me again.”

I open my mouth to say something, but her words hit me. She was right, I’d left her again. Fuck.

“Yeah,” she crosses her arms when I go speechless. “You admitted to your mistakes, apologized, and then left me. How do you think that’s made me feel?”

“I thought it was best if I left you alone,” I walk out of the way from the entrance and she follows me to my car, parked in the lot. “I just wanted to give you space--a chance at being happy.”

She scoffs, leaning against the driver’s side door. “Thought it was best for who, Harry? Who are you to define my happiness? It would’ve been nice just to hear you were doing okay!”

“I’m sorry!” I stumble for another excuse but I come up with none. “The truth is, seeing you with Alec that day I...it was hard for me. I couldn’t be around you like that.”

“What’s that mean?”

“I...” I look at her, looking at me expectantly. She was a woman with an agenda, she had come here looking for answers and wasn’t going to leave until I gave them to her. “I want you to be happy, all that shite. You can’t do that with me around. And it’s hard for me seeing you with someone else...I can’t stand to be in your life like that. Where I’m just...your ex.”

“So you’re saying, it took me nearly dying for you to realize?” Her eyebrow quirks up.

“In a way,” I huff. “It just, took me being around you to remember what I left, when we ended things. It also made me realize the mess I left behind-”

“Don’t you dare feel sorry for yourself,” she calls me out like nobody else could. It makes me laugh nervously and she takes it the wrong way. “Don’t laugh, I’m serious! I’ve felt sorry enough for the both of us for years. And maybe Y/N from a month ago would’ve wanted you to suffer a little bit, but not anymore. This last month...I’ve just felt so free and happy Harry. I get what you mean now, I get it. And I’m alright.”

“That’s great, I’m happy for you Y/N.”

“Yeah, I mean I get it, but you did go about it in the worst possible way-”

“I know.”

“I’m not done,” she pushes my shoulder. “Anyway, just because you did some shitty stuff, you don’t deserve to suffer okay? Move on. Onward. Not backwards.”

I’m taken aback again when she pushes herself off my car and wraps her arms around my shoulders. I slowly envelop her into me, savoring the feel of holding her even if it’s just for a moment.

“You deserve happiness,” she says in my ear. “If that means ghosting me, I won’t fight it. You just...have to let me know.”

“That’s not called ghosting,” I say as she separates herself from me. I want to pull her back but I stuff my hands in my pockets.

“Potato potato,” she waves her hand. “I should go. Just...take care of yourself Harry.”

Y POV (1 year later):

“That’s wonderful news,” I smile at my client who gathers their materials back into their portfolio. “I’ll have my assistant forward the contract over tonight. I look forward to working with your team.”

I shake hands and watch them leave the room before collapsing into my chair. I knew starting your own business was hard, but this last year was a bumpy road. I’d started my own consultation business, and only had two clients. This was my first big-deal contract I’d signed; I was promised two whole years with this team!

I reach for my phone to tell Alec, but I remember we weren’t talking. Well, I wasn’t speaking to him--he’d told me last night before my big meeting that he’d been offered a promotion at work. But the catch was it was in the Edinburgh offices “which works out perfectly for us! Your sister lives there, we can visit them often...what do you think?”

I’d been so angry then. Firstly, he’d sprung the news on me the night before a big day, and second he’d already made the decision for us. I was so angry I’d just gone quiet, and told him I had a big meeting the next morning.

My fingers itch though, to tell someone. My fingers hover over Harry’s name.

Every since I confronted him last year at work, he disappeared again but not completely. He texted me a few times, once on my birthday, another during a heat wave in the city asking me if I wanted to grab drinks. I wasn’t available and he hadn’t really texted me since. I knew he was a phone call away, and he knew the same of me. Yet neither of us ever picked up the phone to call each other. I wasn’t sure why, but we were still giving each other space.

Well fuck it, I think. I call him and he picks up on the fourth ring.

“Y/N?”

“Hey, are you busy?”

“Uh no--hold up, wait. Not you...Sorry Y/N give me a second.”

I bite my lip, he could be at work, I should’ve texted him.

“Hey,” Harry’s tone is different now, softer and the background noises quiet to almost nothing. “Sorry it was so loud in there, we’re celebrating a birthday--Serena, the receptionist you remember?”

“Oh yeah,” I have a vague picture of her in my head. “Don’t let me keep you from the festivities-”

“Why did you call? S’no big deal, I’m not a big cake person anyway.”

“Ooh, cake? Eat a slice for me, I don’t get enough sweets living with a health nut...” I trail off realizing who I was talking to.

“I’ll save you one if you swing by?” Harry suggests after a beat of awkward silence. Another second passes as I consider what he’s asking: he wanted to see me.

“Uh, okay! You don’t have to ask me twice,” I grin, a strange bubble of excitement making it’s way through me. “My office is actually not too far from your station. I’ll walk it.”

“Your office? Where are you these days?” Harry asks as I slip my bag over my body and head out the door. I was exactly an 8 minute walk from his station--I’d mapped it when I found the place cheap online.

“I’m renting a whole office! It’s all very professional--I mean it’s like, one and a half rooms..oh and I have to share the toilets with the whole floor-”

“That’s good, so there’s no way you’ll be caught dead in there if you’re sharing it with the floor,” I hear the laugh in his voice.

“That’s a very insensitive thing to say,” I scold him.

“It’s been a year, c’mon Y/N.”

“We almost died!”

“We weren’t going to die. You’re alive right now!”

“Thanks to a really bad detective and a toilet seat,” I say and relish at the sound of Harry’s laugh on the other end of the line.

“That’s not how you thank someone who saved your life,” Harry finally says when he’s done laughing.

“You didn’t save my life, I was never going to die in the first place remember?”

“Touche,” he laughs. “Get over here faster, I want to see your face.”

“I’m trying!” I speed up. The background noise grows louder on his side again and he apologises. “S’alright. Anyway I just called cuz I had good news and nobody to share it with immediately.”

“Tell me.”

“Long story short, I started my own consulting firm! Finance advice--stuff like that, and I signed my first long-term contract! With an actual client not just for like, a project! I’m-” I squeal, I couldn’t help it. “It’s such a big deal for me I’ve been struggling just breaking ever since I started up.”

“Y/N I’m getting you the whole bloody cake for that,” Harry says. I finally turn the corner to his station, nearly jogging at this point.

“Only if Serena doesn’t mind.” I joke.

“In that dress, who would mind,” he says. I pause on the street, he could see me. I squint but he’s nowhere in sight. And then there, he steps out from the steps and waves. I don’t bother taming the smile on my face and neither does he.

“I see you Detective,” I shout.

“I saw you first!” He shouts.

In an instant we’re rushing towards each other, bodies crashing as I wrap my arms around his neck and squeeze hard. It felt like a reunion.

“How did we go this long without seeing each other,” I say when we pull apart. “I’ve actually missed you.” With the closure between us and no baggage weighing our memories down, I’d actually begun to feel nostalgic about Harry every time I thought about us--usually the friendship, not quite the marriage.

“I don’t know,” Harry pulls me close to him again. “I think we gave each other too much space this time around. We’ve got to find a better middleground.”

“I think we’re standing on it.” I joke.

“Hey, Styles!” A voice calls from the entrance. “Stop snogging your girl and come back in here. Serena’s wondering why you’re running away from her big day.”

“I’m not snogging anybody,” Harry calls back. “And I’ll be there in a minute.”

“Bring her with ya, we’ve got plenty of cake!”

Harry looks down at me and I raise an eyebrow. “You think they’ll let me have more than a slice?”

“I’m their commanding officer, I can tell them to let you have as many as you want.”

“Lead the way,” I grin, half excited to see Harry and half excited for the baked goods. Harry grabs my hand and leads me in. Unfortunately, enough people recognize me from the bank heist that Harry has to explain we’ve known each other for a while. Fortunately, enough people remember me to ply me with sweets to make up for Harry screwing up my case. I have zero complaints and celebrate the day with free cake.

H’s POV

My phone vibrates with Y/N’s text, she was here for lunch. Ever since she called me a couple weeks ago and we decided we couldn’t live without staying in contact, we tried to pop over for lunch whenever we could. It felt like old times. Being Y/N’s friend again was what I was missing out on. I was finally living the version of my life that felt right. I had a bounce in my step, I felt happy when I woke up. Even my officers teased me, trying to allude that I was getting some until I threatened them with paperwork. But I was brighter at work too.

I text Y/N that I would be a few minutes more, and when I finally go into the lobby to meet her she’s having a conversation with Serena.

“Man of the hour,” Serena says as I walk up. “Your girl’s here.”

“I can see that, thank you.” Serena insisted on calling Y/N that despite telling her multiple times we weren’t together.

“Serena was just telling me all the wild things she got up to for her sixty-fifth,” Y/N winks at Serena. I didn’t want to be part of that conversation so I drag her by the arm out of the station.

We walk in silence towards a small sandwich shop around the corner from us. I grab her swinging hand to catch her attention, and she gives me a small smile before turning away. But she keeps her hand in mine.

She’s unusually quiet, and I wait until after we’ve ordered to broach the subject. Before I could, she blurts out: “Alec's got to give his final answer today.” I nearly choke on my sandwich. She’s told me her predicament last week when I noticed she looked upset and wouldn’t let her be until she told me. I was gutted, but it didn’t seem like she wanted to go.

“I...that means, hm.” I gather my thoughts--and all my emotions too. “Have you decided if you’re...moving with him?”

“I dunno, this is an amazing job offer. I could be closer to my sister too but...I just don’t know. My life’s in London, my new practice too. How can I leave it all?”

“That’s tricky,” I say even though deep inside I was relieved it sounded like she wasn’t going. “Couldn’t you just move your practice there? Travel to London when you had meetings? You could always stay with me if you needed.”

She huffs, there was more she wanted to say but she keeps it in. I push her to open up. “It’s just, he sprang this on me a couple weeks ago and he just expected me to follow him. I love him, I do. But that’s asking a lot! It’s only been a year or so, and it’s nice to know he’s serious enough about me to want me to go with him. I just...”

“And we only just reconnected again,” I try to sound lighthearted but when she looks at me I can tell she knows I feel more than I’m letting on.

“Can you imagine?” She raises her eyebrow. “If I told him I’m staying because I just reconnected again with my ex...”

“Ex-husband makes us sound older than we are.”

“We are old,” she puts her sandwich down and sighs. “You wear orthopedic shoes Harry.”

“I won’t take offense to that,” I look down at my shoes. They were comfortable on the job. “So...I’m not factored into your decision at all? Whether you want to stay or not?”

I see the emotion in her eyes; she was conflicted. “I dunno,” she finally says.

“Don’t let me hold you back,” I say even though I wanted to beg her to stay. “You love him right? Maybe you should...”

She stares ahead, her face falling. I knew Y/N’s face before a cry, so I reach my hand out and clasp hers over the table. She squeezes my hand once before removing it, I felt like I did something wrong.

“Anyway,” her face brightens up again, though the look in her eyes stays. “I watched that new movie you recommended and it was awful...”

She changes the subject swiftly, and I don’t object. I didn’t know how to tell her to stay without being selfish, and I didn’t know how to tell her it was okay to go and act like I was telling her the truth.

But near the end of my shift, the evening receptionist buzzes me she was letting my girlfriend through. I don’t bother correcting her.

“Hey Y/N!” one of my officers calls out to her when she walks into the floor. “We’re all planning on throwing you a party.”

“For what?” She stops by his desk. I notice Detective Cole eyeing her, before joining in.

“He actually has a life now, he’s usually a lot more bossy with us.”

Y/N turns to me, eyebrow raised. “I’m afraid the party’s a little premature. But I’d never say no to cake.”

My heart sinks, she was going. I watch her walk towards me and she notices my expression, the smile is gone from her face by the time she reaches me.

“I told Alec I would try it out, 6 months. See how it goes...I can see my sister more often, help her out with my niece...” It sounds like she’s coming up with excuses to justify herself to me.

“That’s...” my words get stuck in my throat, the lie was too big to get out. “Your sister will love that.” I settle with. I take her hand and walk her out to a more private hallway. “When do you leave.”

“Two weeks,” she bites her lip. “I-I’m gonna miss you Harry. We just got into a flow and-”

“We’ll still talk.” I pull her in, I couldn’t bear to watch her face fall apart in front of me. And I didn’t want her to see my own face crumbling. I tuck her under my chin, “We’ve got phones, and you’ll be in London sometimes for work right? We won’t be like before, we’ll still talk.”

I know she can feel my heart racing, and I want her to know what she was doing to me because my mouth can’t seem to tell her. I hold her for a little longer, and when she goes, I know my unit won’t be throwing any parties for her in a while.

Three Months Later:

I’m in bum mode by 8pm that Friday. I’d had a long week, a tough case with no breaks and finally had an evening off so I changed into sweats the second I got home, taken a hot shower and washed the week off.

The knock on the door surprises me. The peephole doesn’t distinguish who’s outside, a hood covering their face. I decide to open the door, to find a teary Y/N hundreds of miles from home.

“Y/N-”

“I wanted you to tell me to stay.” she says to me immediately. Her tears continue dripping onto her cheeks. I stare in confusion, wondering for a moment if my lack of sleep had caused me to hallucinate her.

“Wha-”

“When I told you about the move...you told me I should go. I wanted you to tell me to stay Harry! I thought you would’ve told me to stay.”

I move aside silently, so we weren’t having a conversation where my neighbours could hear.

“How was I supposed to know that?”

“I don’t know!” she throws her bag, coat, and phone down on the floor in a heap. “You just were! I thought when I told you, you would say-”

“I didn’t want to tell you what to do with your life based on what I wanted! I thought I already established that!” Suddenly we’re arguing.

“You never had an issue before!”

“Well look where it lead us,” I move away from the door and back to where I was previously relaxing on the couch.

“A country apart!” She’s hot on my heels. “Didn’t you want me to stay?”

Some part of me is still completely confused what was going on, but Y/N’s fiery frustration overflows into my cup and an invisible force pours it down my throat.

“Yes. Yeah! Of course I wanted you to stay!”

“So why didn’t you say that?” She cries.

“I was trying not to be selfish!”

“Well you just pick the worst times to be selfish!”

“I never said I was good with my timing.” I mumble.

“Don’t treat me like-like some fragile porcelain Harry!” Y/N gets right into my face. “I’m not! I’m different, I’ve grown from that fragile place. I don’t need you walking on eggshells around me, I just want you to be honest!”

“When am I not honest?” I shout back.

“You haven’t been honest with me for months! Just say what you feel Harry, stop bloody holding back all the time! I just want the real you!”

“Fine!” I explode. “I love you Y/N! I love you so much it physically hurts me to be near you and not be able to hold you. I want to be able to kiss you like I used to, I want to go back in time and warn myself to get it right! I want to tell you how amazing you are and how sorry I am every day. I can’t! We’ve both got our own lives! I’m not being dishonest I just don’t want to fuck with your life again! I’ve accepted that I’m nothing more than an ex and your best friend!”

That stops her in her tracks. Her chest heaves as she swipes at her cheeks, and then she pushes her hands into my chest. I stumble but catch myself. She pushes me again, big tears rolling down her cheeks, and I stumble onto the couch. She turns and paces to the door and back.

“What are you even doing here? Aren’t you supposed to be in Edinburgh?” I finally ask the question I should’ve asked the second I saw her.

“Sure,” she throws herself onto the seat next to me and buries her face in her hands. “I...I didn’t want to be there. I just had to leave, and I couldn’t stand my sister going on about what a catch Alec was. How I should feel lucky. I had to get away. I never should’ve left London...I just thought maybe Alec was my chance at a fresh happy future, and you told me to go so I thought you didn’t want me to stay. But I fucked up there too, and I just had to go. And I came here with nowhere else--I can’t even live in my own home for three more months...”

She trails off. It was a lot of information to process. I don’t know how long we stay on the couch like that, a foot apart in silence.

“Everyone I know will probably think I’m just an idiot for coming here of all places, but this was the only place that made sense because I--Harry I think I...” She glances at me. “I...”

“I know,” I say after she struggles to say what she wanted to say. But I knew.

“But I feel so guilty, I’m doing to him what you did to me...it’s not fair.”

I didn’t think about it like that, I realise. But this situation was more complicated than that, I tell her. We had history, she’d moved to a whole new country for him, he must know somewhere Y/N didn’t actually want to move. But the parallels between her situation and ours are clear as day. I don’t know what to say.

“Stay the night,” I put a hand on her thigh. She doesn’t move it off. “Get some sleep, when you wake up tomorrow, make your decision. You know how I feel...and you know how you feel.”

“You’re right,” she lays her hand on top of mine. I thread my fingers through hers and hold on. Her puppy eyes tear me apart, I want to gather her in my arms and kiss her misery away. But I don’t want to add to her guilt.

“Let me get you something to eat, you’re probably hungry.” holding her hand was getting painful. I leave her alone in the living room, so she could collect herself. If someone told Harry three years ago this was where I would end up, he would’ve laughed in their face.

Y POV:

I couldn’t believe I did that, I think as I sit on the 5 hour ride back to Edinburgh. I felt untethered yesterday, after arguing with Alec all week because I was just miserable when I wasn’t in London. My sister’s pressure to be happy with what I had, I felt like I had no one to turn to who would understand me. And that had driven me into Harry’s arms, the train ride there fueling my frustration and anger. It had accidentally exploded in Harry’s direction when I got to his place but I was glad for it. He’d told me how he felt. And it was complicated as hell for me but somewhere deep inside, I knew where this was leading.

When I get back home to a worried Alec, we sit down and have a hard conversation. It breaks my heart leaving him, but after one last night together I pack most of my things and head to my sisters. The irony isn’t lost of me, hers was exactly where I went to when Harry and I split.

My sister tries to be supportive but I by the time the three months are over, I feel suffocated with her overprotective nature, and the full house she lived in.

“You’re just going to do what you want to do aren’t you?” She asks the day she drops me back off to the station. I’d spent the rest of the three months at hers--I couldn’t go back home to my house anyway and something about going back to London for another man felt wrong. I’d seen Alec a few times in those months. The last time was last night, we’d shared a few drinks and maybe some kisses. But it was a final goodbye last night, heavy but final.

“I don’t want to be a bad person,” I say. “I just don’t want to feel stuck somewhere because I feel bad.”

“You’re not a bad person,” my sister brushes my hair behind my shoulder as she hugs me tight. “I love you. Mum would be so proud of you for following your heart, you always did play it too safe.”

“I guess my rebellious phase just came a little late.”

“Ever since you met that Harry guy, you quit your stable job and haven’t been the same since,” she wags her finger at me like a stern maternal figure. She breaks character when she laughs and hugs me again. “M’gonna miss having you here. The kids loved having their aunt around.”

“I’m sure they’re happier having their play room back.” I joke to cover up how sad I felt leaving them too. Even though most days felt like we were walking all over each other, it felt like growing up in our small childhood home again; a nice reset before I headed back to London.

The train ride goes by quickly, and I settle back into my home over the weekend, getting my furniture out of storage and cleaning up after the last tenants. I’d been gone only 6 months but the second I walked through the door, I knew I was home again.

Letting Harry know I was back makes me nervous so I put it off for the week. I show up at his flat the following Saturday, wringing my hands as I wait for him to answer. I didn’t even know if he was home.

“Y/N,” a shocked voice says as I turn to walk away. Harry studies me as I stand awkwardly in his hall. “You’re back.”

I hear what he doesn’t say: you never called me after you showed up three months ago. and what happened to you?

“Hey,” I brush past him into his flat, fiddling with my jacket as he locks the door. “I’m back in London.”

“I can see that.” He eyes me. “Alone?” He asks, and again I hear the words he doesn’t say.

“Alone,” I smile. “I just needed...time to figure things out. I’ve been staying with my sister.”

“Full house?” He says, knowing it before I had to say it.

“So full,” I laugh, and just like that everything is okay. He takes my jacket from me and hangs it in his closet, like he knew I was going to stay a while. “There were too many mornings when I woke up to my niece just staring at me, waiting for me to wake.”

“Aw, they must miss you now.”

“Yeah,” I follow him through to his living room. I remember the last time I was here, sort of embarrassing looking back. “I was missing London though. And...you.”

He looks up. “Are you-”

“Harry,” I swallow what I need to say. His gaze is laser-sharp and it’s slightly intimidating to admit something like this. I’d given my heart to him before, and here I was giving it again after I’d spent years healing from what he did to it. It felt right, but also foolish. I guess love would always feel a little foolish.

“Y/N,” he says after I don’t say anything.

“So,” I walk up to where he stands near the window, the afternoon sun illuminates his handsome face. I reach up to touch it, no longer able to keep my hands to myself when he was so close. My breath catches as he closes his eyes against my palm, his lashes casting shadows on his cheeks.

“Y/N,” he keeps his eyes closed, like I would disappear if he opened them.

“I’m finally home,” I tell him, feeling the familiar lump in my throat as my eyes tear up. He opens his eyes then, they’re also pooling with unshed tears. It makes me laugh; he arches a brow. “We’re both here, in each other’s arms finally and...we’re crying.”

“We’re not a very typical pair, are we?”

“Nothing typical about us.” I say and he chuckles, kissing my wrist. My heart stutters in my chest.

“You’re either crazy or just incredibly forgiving, giving me a second chance at this.” Harry says outright.

“It’s us I’m giving a second chance to,” I slide my hands up, locking them around his neck.

“D’you think we’ll get the timing right this time?” He whispers as he lowers his face.

“We better,” I keep my eyes on his mouth, the one I’ve thought about kissing for the last three months. And then, finally, his lips are on mine and I nearly cry out of relief having him in my arms. Harry, being my Harry again.

His hands clench the fabric around my waist as he pulls me closer to him, his lips leave mine and he kisses my cheek, my jaw, my temple, before he crushes me to him.

“Harry I-” I couldn’t breathe, but my strained voice gives that away and he lets me go. I’m surprised to see the tears now trailing down his face. “You’re crying,” I swipe at the fallen tears.

“I’m just so happy,” he takes my hands off his cheeks and clasps them against his chest. “Y/N I’ve only dreamed of this, I didn’t think the universe cared enough about me to let me have this reality.”

“You and your poetry,” I smile.

“I guess you’re my muse,” He pulls me back to him, this time in a sweeter kiss that lingers. Tears pool in my own eyes as my heart tries to process the enormity of emotions I was feeling. “C’mere, I just want to hold you.”

He leads me to the couch and I lay down next to him. We take in each other, face to face, the grins reflected on both of us is impossible to wipe off.

“I love you Y/N, to the sun and back.”

“Isn’t it the moon and back?” I ask.

“Sun’s further out,” he smiles like he was expecting the question. I laugh, he kisses the tip of my nose and pulls my leg over his, his arm snaking around my waist so I’m snug against him.

“What am I gonna do with you Styles,” I brush one of his curls back.

“You’ve got forever to figure that out,” he says simply. My heart races at the thought. We’d bungled the first round we spent together, but after all these years apart I had a feeling that we really would have forever this time around.

With all the emotions fluttering inside of me, all the baggage unpacked and out of sight, and Harry’s loving expression looking back at me; I believed in us.

1.5 Years Later (H’s POV):

The house is quiet when I get in--it was half past 11 and I knew Y/N was probably asleep. I texted her a couple hours ago I would be home soon but time had slipped away as I worked. I hoped she wasn’t upset.

I move stealthily through the hall, eventually making my way to our bedroom where she lays sleeping. She’d left the lamp on beside her, and I move around to her side so I can close it. I notice the open book beside her--she fell asleep while reading it again. I set it down on the drawers and tuck her hand into the covers, the subtle diamonds on her finger glows yellow under the soft lamp light. Just looking at the engagement ring sparks a rush of love for the woman before me.

Y/N had surprised me a couple months ago when she proposed to me. We’d were dating again for almost a year and a half--this time it really felt like we’d gotten the timing right on our relationship. We were happier and more in love than we’d ever been. During a candlelit dinner one night, she had pulled a chair up beside me and presented me with the ring and an ultimatum.

Apparently she’d noticed that I was always on edge--like I was waiting for her to realize that she didn’t actually forgive me for all the awful things I put her through. And she was right, but it wasn’t until she said it out loud that I realized it was an anxiety I had. I was waiting for her to realize she could do better than me--leave me the way I left her. But she proposed to show me she wasn’t going anywhere, and she showed me her own ring her father gave her--her mum’s ring.

I was blown away by her observant love, again, how she knew me better than I knew myself. I reassured her I wasn’t going anywhere either, not now or ever. And we decided we didn’t want to set any dates, we were taking it slow. Being engaged was a promise and that was all for now. I wanted to live up to Y/N’s standard, give her and her family a reason to trust me again--not only would they kill me if I ever did anything to her, but I’m pretty sure my own family would kill me too. They were over the moon when they found out we were giving it another go.

“Harry?” Y/N mumbles as I slip under the covers a little while later.

“Sorry for coming home so late,” I whisper. “I got a bit carried away with the case.”

“What’s new,” she shifts to face me, the moonlight from the windows barely illuminating her face. “M’just glad you’re home.”

“Me too,” I pull her towards me. Home, it was this house we’d moved into last year. But mostly, it was this beautiful woman in my arms who opened her heart to me despite everything. I don’t know how I got so lucky. I tell her that.

“S’not luck,” she mumbles. “The universe--our stars are finally aligned.”

“My star was pretty dim, I’m surprised yours found it.” I tuck her hair behind her ear and kiss her temple. “You found it by luck.”

“No. Your star’s always burned the brightest in my universe,” she tucks her face into my neck. “Even when I didn’t want it to be, it was still noticeable.”

“You outshine me in every way in mine,” I lean away so I can hold her face close, resting my forehead on hers. “I love you so much.”

She smiles in the dark, and leaves a kiss on the corner of my mouth. “I love you, and I’d love you more if you came home on time.”

I chuckle, “I’ll try. Tomorrow.”

“Mhm,” she says sleepily. I’d let her sleep, I think as I pull her leg over mine and hold her against my chest. Even though I hated coming home by the time she was asleep, finding her in our little safe space, and being able to hold her close as we fell asleep was my favourite part of the day.

***

The day is nearly over but the paperwork on my desk says otherwise. I sigh and slump in my chair, this was the worst part of my job.

I begin filling it out, and I’m not even halfway through when the phone rings. Serena’s on the other line, “Styles, your patient fiancee is here for you. I don’t think she’s staying patient for long though.”

I tell her I’d be out, smiling as I put down the phone. Y/N was making sure I kept my word from last night, and I would. For her, I would get in extra early tomorrow just to be sure I had the evening with her tonight.

“So when do I get the invitation to the wedding?” I hear Serena say as I walk out to the lobby. She’s putting on her coat to leave and Y/N’s bundled up herself. “And then when do I get to see the mini Styles’? I better be around to see them!”

Not many would, but I notice the slight tension in Y/N’s shoulders at the sensitive topic. I step in.

“You’re worse than my mum,” I tell her. “And she’s actually going to be the grandmother.”

“We just want to see our babies’ babies before we bite the bullet!” Serena shrugs, walking out from behind the counter. “I’ll see you tomorrow Harry, Y/N it was lovely seeing you as always.”

We wave her off, and then I wrap my arm around Y/N and we walk out to my car.

“That’s the first question everyone continues to ask me,” Y/N says as we walk. “When the date is.”

“Does that bother you?” I check in.

“A little, but only because it leads to even more questions when I say we haven’t set a date.”

We get into the car, and I ask her the other question I wanted to know: “And the baby thing? Does that...bother you?”

She turns her body to look at me, tilting her head as she tries to read me. “It doesn’t...does it bother you?”

“No,” I say honestly. “I’m happy where we are. All that stuff can...come after. I’m just-I’m happy with you.”

“Good talk then,” she grins. I can’t help but lean over for a kiss then.

“Well I don’t mind the baby making part,” I tell her. “But I think the actual babies can wait.”

She pushes me away as her cheeks flush like we hadn’t been dating and married and dating again for over ten years. “Sometimes I think you’ve just got one thing on your mind.”

“Yeah,” I say as I start the car. “That’s you.”

“Is that what distracted you so bad when you were working on my case? Because you were totally distracted and we almost died-”

“We were never going to die!” I say over her--this was a common topic of conversation between us.

“I was going to bleed out and die!” She tries to speak over me.

“Oh now you were going to bleed out? You were never dying!” I shout even louder. And we keep going for most of the way home until Y/N catches sight of a dog at a crosswalk and begins to coo at it through the window.

“Maybe we should get a dog,” she starts on another of our reoccurring topics. I sigh, ready to launch into why we should wait. And that’s how the rest of the ride home goes. Not that I minded, I could discuss the same topics with her over and over for eternity.

“You’re just threatened by a dog,” Y/N continues as we park and head up to our front door. “Because then my love would be split between both of you.”

“Yeah sure, that’s it.” I roll my eyes at her silly reasoning. But I still grab her hand in mine and kiss it as we walk in. My stomach flutters when she gazes at me as the door closes behind her.

“I’m going to wear you down soon,” she says as she takes my coat from me. I take them both out of her hands and leave them in a heap on the staircase, kissing her so she stops talking. She smiles against my lips, knowing that she was wearing me down, and I’d give her anything she asked for. Anything to make her happy. I loved her infinitely.

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ptergwen · 3 years

Text

last christmas | pt. 2

❆ series masterlist ❆

w/c: 2.5k

warnings: one suggestive joke and a couple of angsty moments

a/n: yo i forgot that harry was actually in this movie as an extra? that’s kinda funny to me but anyways pls send requests (ik it’s annoying i keep asking i’m just so bored y’all help) and enjoyyy

━━━ *:･。.

today feels better than most days. the throbbing headache you usually wake up with isn’t there. plus, you have your date with tom later. it still feels surreal to say that. it still feels surreal he’s your friend’s brother, and you only found out three days ago.

you throw on some sweats and head into the living room. your roommate alex is in front of the tv with a bowl of cereal. she puts it down, the spoon making an obnoxiously loud clink. you’re sensitive to sound, so you unintentionally wince.

“sorry, y/n/n. i thought you had the day off, no?” she asks, lowering the tv for your sake. you smile at the gesture and go to grab your coat. “i do. i just wanna get breakfast.” “we have stuff here,” alex reminds you and picks up her cereal for emphasis. she’s careful not to drop the spoon this time. laughing to yourself, you shrug into your coat.

“i’ll pass. i wanted to say hi to harry, anyway.” “right, tonight’s the night.” she turns her head towards you and smirks. “you’re shagging his brother.” your eyes go comically wide. “no i’m not! he’s taking me out somewhere,” you defend and button up your coat as fast as you can. it’s time to get out of here.

“i’ll make plans just in case,” alex calls out as you shuffle to the door. “yeah, bye!” you shout back. you planned on asking if she wanted anything, but you were too distracted. oh well.

━ ❆

the café isn’t too crowded when you get there. harry is on register, so he’s probably in a good mood. he eyes you curiously when you step up. you give him a big smile.

“you’re not in today,” he says quietly, pushing up the santa hat he’s wearing. you stifle a laugh. you’re all supposed to dress up festively, but you don’t. your manager made an exception. one of your co workers is watching harry, so he fixes the hat. it’s not done without a long exhale.

“i’m here for coffee,” you explain and glance up at the menu. harry squints at you. “you couldn’t have gone anywhere else?” feigning offense, you put your hand on your chest. “why, you don’t want to see me?” “when you’re supposed to be home resting, no.” he taps a button on the register. “what can i get you?”

“first of all, i have a date later. that won’t be happening,” you tell him smugly. he would try to act annoyed, but he’s honestly happy for you. tom, too. “can i have an iced coffee with liquid sweetener? please?” harry raises an eyebrow. “room for milk?” “sure,” you almost chirp. he can’t help but grin.

“i haven’t seen you this happy the whole time i’ve known you,” he mumbles while punching in your order. your smile fades into a concerned grimace. “is that okay, do you think?” harry looks up at you again. “why wouldn’t it be?” “because, i mean, it’s only one date. it could end up going no where.”

you lean over the counter so you can talk quieter. “what would i be happy about then?” “excuse me?” a woman interrupts your conversation louder than necessary. you’re trying to search harry’s face for an answer, but he doesn’t give you one. “one second, sorry,” he apologizes to the customer. you stand up right again.

“tom wouldn’t do all this if he didn’t feel something,” harry nearly whispers while you get out your money. you read your total befofe he could tell you. you let your hand linger in his when you hand him the cash. “you’ll have more than one night of happiness. you deserve it.”

you’re starting to get a bit emotional, so you pull your hand back. you nod and manage a small smile. “thank you, harry. really.” “you’ll let me know how it goes?” he checks. “tomorrow, yeah. have a good shift.” you give him a finger wave and go off to get your coffee. he waves back.

━ ❆

tom gets a text from harry a few minutes after you leave.

y/n is really special. don’t be a div tonight.

he scoffs at his phone and shuts it off. your smile pops into his mind then. he only got to see it once, but he can’t seem to forget it.

harry is right. you are really special, and he better not mess this up.

━ ❆

you and tom decided on eight for your date. he’s meeting you outside your place because wherever you’re going is in walking distance. you bundle up accordingly in your fluffiest jacket and some earmuffs. you’ve never worn them before, but they’ll be your best friend tonight. they’re also cute. this is the time to be cute.

tom buzzes to let you know he’s there at eight sharp. his punctuality is kind of a surprise. you don’t know much about the real him, but this is rare from what you’ve gathered. you tell him you’re coming and hop out the door.

the thing alex said earlier does cross your mind, and she did leave you the apartment. never mind all of that. you try to think of anything but that before you get outside.

“hey,” tom greets as you walk down the stairs. he grins playfully at your attire. “you look cozy.” “you don’t.” he’s wearing a thin black jacket with a flannel underneath. it’s not ideal for the middle of winter in london. a smug smile pulls at your lips.

“you’re gonna walk in that?” you gesture to his outfit, moving so you’re next to him. he hums. “i’ll let you tease me for it the whole way there.” the two of you start walking side by side. it doesn’t take long for you to fall into step. “the whole way? how far is it?” you raise an eyebrow.

“twenty minutes maybe? it can’t be too bad. we have loads to talk about,” tom says rather suggestively. you look over and he’s smirking. there’s never a dull moment with this man. that’s actually just what you need right now. “true. you start,” you prompt him, your arm brushing against his. “tell me all about you.” he leans closer to you instinctively.

“well, i’m an actor. obviously,” tom shrugs like it’s no big deal, making you laugh quietly. he really likes your laugh. “besides that. like, what do you do when you’re not acting?” you ask, eyes fixed on him. he’s so pretty under the streetlights. all the time, really. “this is so boring, but i love golf. i’m rubbish, though,” he says the second part under his breath.

“and i thought you were good at everything,” you tease, tom faking a frown. “no, but seriously. it’s probably nice to do some regular stuff when you can.” he exhales in a way that seems reflective. “exactly, i like having some separation. what about you?” “what do i do when i’m not acting?” you ask sarcastically. “sure,” he plays along.

you think about it while you turn the corner. tom watches you intently, like you’re about to say something actually interesting. you’re not. “not much anymore.” he’s about to ask what you mean by anymore, but you keep going. “i took a gap year from uni, so i’ve been getting that sorted,” you continue, looking up at the dark sky. this isn’t your favorite discussion.

“makes sense. what are you studying?” also not your favorite discussion. “i’m undecided. i was thinking about psychology, but...” you search for something, anything you can to change the subject. the first thing you see is the first thing you mention. “your ears are bright red right now,” you giggle and point at one. tom presses his hands to them, feeling how cold they are.

“damn, you’re right,” he gives in to your conversation from earlier. without thinking about it, you pull your earmuffs off. you put them around his head instead. they’re pink with white snowflakes on them. tom looks cuter with them than you do, you think. “here. these should make them a normal color.”

“aw, but i don’t want you to be cold,” he protests and goes to take them off. you grab his hand before he can. “i’m not.” grinning, he properly takes your hand in his. your fingers lace together like you’ve held hands a million times. he lets them drop between you two and keeps leading the way to your mystery spot.

you swing your hands back and forth, smiling when you feel his grip tighten. tom pats one of the earmuffs. “i think we’ll both be warm once we get there.” “where exactly is ‘there’?” you laugh out. it was supposed to be a surprise, but you have to know. he points at something straight ahead. you’re still too far to see it.

“yeah, i can’t tell what that is,” you confirm. his reply is a satisfied hum. “good. let me keep you in suspense for at least five more minutes.” “you’re cheeky, aren’t you?” he chuckles and swings your hands again. “i’ve been told.”

you two finally end up at a hot chocolate stand. there are white lights strung in the trees surrounding it, music playing quietly into the night. the atmosphere welcomes and comforts you as soon as you get on line.

“i figured it would be nice to get one of these rather than making them for a change,” tom fills you in. he seems unsure of it now that you’re here, his voice lower than before. harry’s text is replaying in his head. he wants this to be good enough, more than good enough. should he have planned something more? his nerves die down when you squeeze his hand in yours.

this is the perfect low pressure date you’d hoped for. the focus is on each other and not some fancy meal. you were right about the movies not changing tom. “this place is really cute. i like it.” you move up on line together. “and my hot chocolates kind of suck, so yeah. it is.” “no, i bet they’re delicious,” he reassures you with one of his famous eye crinkling grins.

you chat more about your barista skills and all the kitchen disasters harry has had to save you from. the story of the time you made foam explode all over the countertops has him giggling. his laugh is contagious, so you end up joining in. your laughter eventually quiets because it’s your turn to order.

“hi, we’ll have two large hot chocolates?” tom orders for you two. you shoot him a curious look. “large? i’ll never finish.” the sizes here are huge, which is part of their gimmick. it’s also why tom found it interesting. the joke is that the stand itself is small, but they have gigantic drinks.

“leftovers, then.” he winks at you. you’re disappointed you have to let his hand go while he pays. the cashier says your drinks will be ready shortly. tom thanks him and turns back to you. “you probably got in so much trouble, huh?” he asks about your work horror story. you look him over for a few seconds.

you’re shocked how genuinely interested he is in everything you tell him. there are much cooler things he could be talking about, but he wants to hear from you. it makes you feel like there’s something between you two already. like, you’re old friends or soulmates or anything bigger than two strangers on a first date.

even though it’s still early to tell, you definitely have a connection of some kind.

“nope. i’m better at cleaning than i am at making cappuccinos,” you remark, the cashier coming back with two large hot chocolates. tom hands you yours first. he takes his after. “thank you so much,” he tells the man again. “have a nice night,” you add. the two of you take your drinks to a small table under a tree.

you sit across from each other, tom setting the earmuffs down. he pushes them back to you with a smile playing on his lips. “i like those better on you,” you murmur before taking a sip of hot chocolate. “pink’s my color,” he agrees and does the same. it’s so good that you decide to have some more, even though there’s steam coming from the lid.

“maybe i will finish all of this.” “i knew you’d like it.” tom laughs behind his cup. he got all worked up about it for nothing. you’re having one of your best nights in a while, which almost makes you not want to bring up the next topic. it’s sadly inevitable, so you might as well get it out of the way. christmas.

“so, do you have any plans for christmas?” you start, downing another sip. tom puts his drink down and leans back in the chair. “i’m staying over my mum and dad’s. we’ll have our traditional holland celebration.” he smiles to himself just thinking about it. you’re happy he has something to look forward to. you don’t.

“are you doing anything?” there’s the big question. people usually get awkward when you go into detail, which is exactly why you won’t. “actually, no.” his excitement changes to confusion. he furrows his eyebrows and sits up again. “you don’t celebrate?” “i do, just not anymore. not this year, at least.”

tom is extremely curious what this ‘anymore’ is about. it’s the second time you’ve mentioned it.

“i used to love it. my christmas spirit ran out, i guess,” you eleborate, eyes shifting down to the frozen grass. tom almost frowns. it’s not because he pities you. no one likes that. christmas is one of, if not, his favorite times of year. he just wishes the whole world could be happy this holiday season. the lovely girl sitting in front of him, especially.

there has to be something he can do.

“no, you can always get it back,” he says softly, searching for your eyes. “i’ll help you.” you look up at him again and blink back the tears you feel coming. tom must feel so lost right now. he wouldn’t be with context. you’re going to tell him what happened when you’re ready because you do want him to understand. trusting him feels like an instinct.

“how?” your voice comes out even quieter than his. you pick up your drink to distract yourself. “let’s see,” tom thinks aloud. he snaps when he gets an idea. “have you done any decorating?” “my roommate put up a tree. she never did the ornaments, though.” he gasps over dramatically, earning a laugh from you.

“you can’t leave a naked tree sitting around.” “i told her it looked stupid,” you sigh and sip your hot chocolate. tom holds out a hand for you. “we should go to the shops”

it would be easy to say no. it would be easy to go back home and hide under your covers and avoid the missed calls from your family. the catch is, easy isn’t progress. you can’t move past this unless you work to get it done.

you take tom’s hand and stand up from the table.

“we should also get a ride this time.”

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