#followed by immediately posting a screenshot of the post as though it’s breaking news | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

lastweeksshirttonight · 2 months

Text

What is this?? Lee actually following up on promises of posting longform writing??? I know, I'm scared too.

Last Lee Tonight (wherein Lee quotes noted political commentator Olivia Rodrigo) Season One, Episode Nine

(Original air date: 6/29/2014) Topics covered: Burwell v. Hobby Lobby, LGBT rights and discrimination in Uganda

Trigger warning: discussions of homophobia

"That is why I, personally, refuse to pay for Mennonite cabinets. Because Jason Bourne could, conceivably, beat someone to death with one of those things."

Because the last time I posted one of these reviews was (checks notes) August 2023, a brief recap of where we are in terms of the season developing is in order. Episode Eight was the first time the entire main story was put on LWT's YouTube page, after a very... scattershot approach to uploading segments onto social media. The show is also coming into its own - although the recap of the week segments are bouncing between being extremely surface-level, sometimes only one joke long, and closer to the current iteration of a small yet rigorous dive into a relevant topic for a few minutes before the main topic, the main stories are beginning to take longer form, even though they are still tied to the idea of the show being immediately relevant.

This episode is one of the few I think is, with a few exceptions, almost completely available on the LWT YouTube page worldwide. Both major segments are uploaded, as well as an extended interview segment. Looking forward, they do experiment with the idea of breaking up most of the episodes and loading them onto YouTube for the rest of season one. At least they're actually, um, loading the main parts of the episodes on YouTube from here on out. As I've said many times before, no one had any idea what kind of show LWT was supposed to be or what it would become.

Another fun fact - apparently you can no longer screenshot these episodes I bought on YouTube on my desktop with PrtSc. What the fuck. Is up. With that?! (aaaah~) Fuck you business daddy you complete sack of daddy-shaped shit. (Clearly I have my ways of getting around this, even if the screenshots seem a bit blurry to me, but... fucking hell, I'm just trying to take a screenshot OF SOMETHING I PAID FOR.)

ANYWAYS. There's an episode of LWT we're ostensibly discussing!

Our first topic is the 2014 World Cup. England has been knocked out, so the tournament is dead to John. Oh John. So innocent. So full of life. You have no clue about the shitstorm you're gonna drop on FIFA's doorstep next season.

At the World Cup, an Uruguayan player, Luis Suarez, bit an Italian player, something I totally forgot about. He also bit TWO OTHER PEOPLE. John calls the Italian player "a delicious piece of prime Italian steak" - I forgot that chaotic bisexuality has been baked into this show from day one but I love it.

(Based on the only hate comment I've ever received, I know someone will probably deign to tell me that John is not bisexual, which... I know. But the writing of this show has chaotic bisexual energy - in some seasons, like the one where John begs Adam Driver to chokeslam him into a table regularly, energy honestly isn't a strong enough word to describe whatever's going on - and I like acknowledging that element of the show.)

John mentions the week has been awash with depressing terrorism news but leads into a segment about Boko Haram being driven out of their hiding places by snakes and bees, an incredible victory for the scariest parts of nature. John is furious that scorpions have instead decided to hide in bananas in supermarkets instead of fighting terrorism. John's grin after delivering that joke is effervescent. He loves this kind of stupid, "now THAT'S a sentence"-style joke.

He's so happy y'all

We take a hard left turn into discussing Syria, and that the US is looking to send money to "appropriately vetted" rebel soldiers. The obvious question is asked - how do you vet rebel soldiers? John suggests a trade-school-style commercial to recruit potential rebel soldiers. (The offer is open to bees and snakes!) One thing I like about the early episodes that does still come through from time to time on the show are these sorts of Daily Show-style fake commercials and PSAs. They can get repetitive after seeing the segments they're covering, but there's usually some fun twists and chances for some real absurdities and escalations you can't do in the show proper.

Our first real segment follows after this, on Burwell v Hobby Lobby. You may remember this as the court case that allowed for Hobby Lobby, a crappy JoAnn's knockoff run by evangelical Christians who also stole artifacts for a bible museum, to not pay for an employee's birth control through the Affordable Care Act because it went against their religion. As a corporation. Because corporations are people now. God this country sucks.

youtube

At the time of airing, this decision hadn't been made yet by the Supreme Court, so John is going over the details of the case, including the questions at the center of it - do corporations have freedom of religion, and are corporations people? John confidently says "no" before realizing he has to actually discuss this, and I really want to live in 2014 John World. This whole segment has a lovely capper extending two ideas to their logical, absurd extremes - government cannot be an a la carte system, something John demonstrates by showing a wild variety of things people don't want to spend their taxes on which starts fairly even-keel but spirals into Fox News talking heads saying that their tax dollars are being spent on Mexican prostitutes. And on the flip-side, if corporations are people, well, people die. Amongst other things.

Something that's been a bit lost about this case in the ten years since is that a Mennonite sect that owned a kitchen cabinet making company also sued the government over providing birth control. I totally forgot about that.

Our "And Now This" segment is on politicians misusing the word 'literally'. Chris Traeger literally adored this segment. (It's short and is exactly what you'd expect. Not much to say here.)

The next segment is on LGBTQIA+ rights in Uganda. Interestingly, John introduces this segment by saying "finally tonight..." despite being only 12 minutes into a 30 minute show. Definitely had me checking the clock in confusion.

youtube

I appreciate that John opens this segment not sugarcoating anything happening to LGBTQIA+ individuals in Uganda, even before he gets into the details of the anti-gay laws there. While there's been segments prior that have been obviously extremely serious, this is the first one that feels like John is coming from a place of seriousness first, jokes second. There are plenty of jokes, yes, lots of very funny ones. But when you compare how this segment opens, with no frills or equivocating, to even the Hobby Lobby segment earlier this episode, there's a pretty obvious difference.

People really didn't know how to react to the line "the moral arc of the universe is long, and it bends away from Uganda." There's like one scattered laugh at that. I'm pretty sure it wasn't supposed to be a joke.

A lot of the details of this segment are deeply upsetting, especially post-Trump in a world where it feels like freedoms are rolling back everywhere and extremist hatemongers like Scott Lively are being treated more and more seriously. The fact that he was laughed at here in the past is refreshing, but knowing that he'd likely be a top senate candidate now is so distressing. There's a lot of things that can be seen in this show in hindsight, most of them so far more benign than this. Unfortunately, the exportation of homophobia now looks less like the death throes of a dying political position, as John posits here from 2014, and more like a big factor in sowing the seeds for this last decade's right-wing global surge.

That being said, Pepe Julian Onziema is a true portrait of grace under fire. The interview with Onziema in the show is extremely illuminating, the kind of interview that makes me wish John did more interviews. Onziema is a delight - I love his seriousness in speaking to the realities of living as an LGBT+ person in Uganda, and his bravery in fighting this fight despite the looming threat of severe prison time. Relatedly, "Sorry doesn't cut it" is such a great comeback to John apologizing for being part of two groups of people that brought this wave of homophobia to Uganda.

There is an extended interview with Onziema on YouTube that dives further into some of the specifics of certain social elements, like context into how Ugandan discourse took on elements of American homophobic talking points (like "gay people are recruiting children") and a timeline of Scott Lively's touring of Uganda. John manages to completely break him by singing part of an early hateful song about "the rainbow belonging to God" as well, which made me so happy. Turn those hateful things into ludicrously stupid ones to destroy them.

youtube

I do highly recommend watching this interview - it's one of the best things that LWT has ever done, still. This has stayed with me for 10 years.

Other notes:

Hey. Hey Lee. You gonna talk about the fit?: Yes of course I am, the meds didn't change my brain THAT much. We have a light blue shirt with a dark blue tie with lighter piping, and a gray suitjacket. This is a subdued look but I like the neutral slate color combination going on here. 8/10

I haven't mentioned the unique title cards for each episode of LWT yet, mainly because this is the first one I found really funny - it's a picture of Renaldo with the caption "Kickus Ballium". (New name for football ahoy!)

Please enjoy this incredible "I'm so smooth" looking freeze frame that I took while pausing the episode to write. So smooth.

"I've got to be honest, being British is sometimes a little like being an alcoholic. When someone says you did something awful, you find yourself going, 'Honestly, I don't even remember doing that, but yeah, probably, probably. I'm a dick, I'm a dick.'" He slipped so easily into that Ian Duncan mode for this line, I so hope he comes back for the Community movie.

#john oliver #last week tonight #last week tonight with john oliver #last lee tonight #Youtube #i am aware that i have spent over half a year on this and have only gotten nine episodes in

3 notes · View notes

southpaw-mrz · 7 months

Text

This is somewhat of an introduction of my page and the Sim I'm currently obsessed with. I go to school for creative writing and I'm an avid gamer, overall nerd, so I like to base my Sims off of characters from my stories or pull inspiration from things I'm into. Enough about me though...

Meet Tiger Stephens. Tiger grew up on the streets of Oakwood (Willow Creek), no parents, no money. The world has hardened him for sure, but he still has a huge heart under that tough shell. Tiger has had his fair share of run-ins with the law. The gangs of Oakwood raised him and taught him everything he knows. At the age of nineteen. Tiger became a street mercenary and moved to Mirror City (San Myshuno), running shady jobs for the criminals of the city. After a job gone wrong, he decided that the city was too much for him and he moved back to Oakwood to reconnect with his roots. Now twenty-two, he's back and adapting to the changes. Recently, he's discovered that his mother passed shortly after leaving him in a box in an alley as an infant for unknown and mysterious reasons.

(Jig looks so cute here, such a good boy ❤️ :3)

This is Jig, Tiger's German Shepherd. Truly man's best friend. Jig was an abandoned dog wandering the town and its outskirts until Tiger showed him the a bit of kindness. Tiger immediately saw that Jig was just like him: rough around the edges but still had a heart of gold. Tiger took him in and the two have become almost inseparable.

Outside of his criminal skills, Tiger is a skilled mechanic. You break it, he'll fix it. Not broken? He'll improve it. The thing Tiger yearns for is a true sense of family as he's never really had one. Will he find what he's looking for in his hometown?

(So there you have it! I'm entirely new to using tumblr as far as running a page and new to posting Sims 4 content period, so bear with me while I figure out a schedule for posting. As of now this is just a Sim whose life I wanted to follow and document and will be posting screenshots of what I deem important to his story. Hope you all enjoy!)

#showusyoursims #sims 4 simblr #my sims #the sims 4 #the sims gameplay #the sims screenshots #the sims #the sims story #simblr #simblog #first post #sims 4 legacy #sims 4 cc #ts4 cc

2 notes · View notes

rubye402 · 2 years

Text

So people have some thoughts on who 432 could be. I have my own thoughts I'd like to share, since a couple of people liked my thank you to Crows Crows Crows so hey.

Also, yes there ARE spoilers to TSP UD again. For the sake of it being spoilers and this WILL be a big post, I'll just add my thoughts below the cut.

So! Who is 432 in my personal hc?

Narrator... At least, formerly before TSP.

Let me explain this one.

So first off, a plot about doing a monotonous and tedious job and finding out the only reason you're happy with it is via mind control and the story is about breaking yourself free to live your life? That is 100% from the perspective of someone who has some experience in this environment, and I will not be convinced otherwise.

Like, we all KNOW a 9 to 5 sucks even if we don't work there, but to so heavily take place in an office building and one that specifically has a shipping department not far from there with shelves upon shelves of boxes is NOT the writings of a man who didn't work at a similar place. Especially when you consider WHY Stanley even exists. Quote from one of the new endings to UD

"I remember before this whole story got started. Back then I was - I was different."

"I used to make big decisions. I was passionate. I was sceptical."

...

"And then, somewhere along the way, I stopped making decisions."

"I became lazy. And I came up with - well..."

"I came up with a character named Stanley to do my thinking for me."

...

"Why did I invent Stanley? Was I lonely?"

"Yes perhaps that's it. Perhaps I needed to imagine companionship."

"And Stanley did make for a wonderful companion."

"Even if he was fiction."

...Not only do we get confirmation of why Stanley and his story was written. He was written to serve as Narry's companion through his life. More than likely, through his job, and his lack of friendly peers IN his job.

And even in the vanilla ORIGINAL game, there was this sheet of paper.

There's literally a whole ROOM dedicated to "Employee 432 peer reviews." No, I'm not joking. Here's a screenshot I took myself.

(Now, I don't wanna assume pronouns, but as a side note, Narry voiced by Kevan Brighting, a male voice, so the fact these papers have He/Him pronouns also fits into that this could be Narrator IRL assuming his voice ISN'T going through a voice filter from... Wherever he's talking from.)

Having all of these negative things said about 432, he might have stopped thinking for himself and just decided to follow along to please his peers. And as a reminder as to how NARRY handles negative feedback, what was one of the first "New Content" paths we see proper?

He IMMEDIATELY bends over backwards to have as little negative reviews as he could from other people. He IMMEDIATELY takes it to heart even though in the end, adding it only makes him unhappy with the final product. He IMMEDIATELY becomes self conscious after the first two critics.

"Only positive reviews of the Stanley Parable. That's my motto of today, and it's always been my motto! I'd do anything for the customer, Stanley."

And speaking of new content, we get to see more than the one place then the "wife" ending

For a refresher: We have the original apartment from the original game, the more expensive looking apartment in the... I don't know what the ending is called, but I called it the "bucket cult" ending, personally. And finally, the Memory Zone... House? Cabin? Property?

We'll say Memory Zone Cabin.

I have a feeling the cheap apartment was during Narry's time working mindlessly for the company.

The expensive either was before or after he worked there. Unfortunately, it's more likely it was before he started working, he lost it, and had to work at his 9 to 5. At least in my eyes.

And finally, the Memory Zone Cabin is, as Narry kinda confirmed it to be, his happy place. That would be the DREAM for him. To live somewhere cozy out with a whole lot of flora and nature. Might I add in the "Story" ending that we get something similar shown to us as a reward for playing Narry's story?

It's not the same exact location, obviously, but it's still very nature-y in theme.

Having all these other locations that isn't the office are usually apartments, or video games in the "Games" endings. Things that Narry COULD feasibly see in his real life to put into TSP. The Mind Control facility is very much mission control and general science fiction looking locations like what you see on TV. There's the museum theme for the "Escape" ending. Maybe the "Zen" ending was another thing like the Memory Zone of a happy place. All things that either one could come up with, or take HEAVY inspiration from in their real life.

The Stanley Parable's Story ending is the ending HE always wanted for himself. Stanley is his escapism character. In Stanley getting this ending, NARRY gets that ending. And when Stanley wanders away from going with this story, he's punished for essentially taking away Narry's one and only way to get a good ending, and so Stanley doesn't get a good ending if Narry doesn't.

Which makes the "Zen" ending all the more potent in sadness. While Stanley is essentially getting to do what Narry does to him of taking the potentially good ending with a very "I'm taking you down with me", Narrator truly doesn't feel genuinely happy himself all the time. This story he crafted is a coping mechanism, and he's desperate for it to work as best as possible. If you had anti depressant medication and they only work a portion of the time; essentially when they actually FEEL like working with and for you, how'd frustrated would YOU feel when they don't work towards them?

TL;DR: 432 has gotten so much bullying from his co-workers, that it wouldn't be a stretch to the imagination that he would want an escape. ANY escape he can find. So I can see 432 being a desperate Narrator making Stanley so he feels like he has SOME semblance of choices being made, even if it's for him. Taking real places he's seen, or taking the image of some happy places, and inserting them into TSP. I can see it being his escapism dream, and the ending of, ironically enough, breaking the cycle, being what HE dreams of most.

#the stanley parable #the stanley parable ultra deluxe #tsp #tspud #tspud spoilers #kinda #tsp narrator #tsp 432 #long post under the cut #And I'm only scratching the surface of my own TSP headcanons

40 notes · View notes

kalijhomentethi · 2 years

Text

Headcanons: Star Guardian Akali

You know, I’ve always written Akali being sad inside. She grew up not being loved in pretty much all her verses. She definitely needs help. It’s just not explored a lot (though mentioned here and there) since a lot of my threads involve her being in a good place. But in that new Star Guardian cinematic, Riot did not hesitate to slap us in the face with “AKALI IS DEPRESSED.” YES. SHE IS DEPRESSED.

I posted screenshots and divided them into four posts to represent the four arcs I noticed in the video.

Spiraling into self-doubt and depression

Fighting her shadow self / doubt

Doubt resurfacing and being unable to fight back against the corruption

Merging into one with her shadow self

The cinematic is aptly named “Shadow of a Doubt.” She’s constantly tormented by Fiddlesticks inside and outside of her dreams. She’s developed a deep fear of them. She hears her own voice whispering to her all the self-doubt she has kept bottled up inside.

When she meets her shadow self, she spares the other no mercy and immediately takes her down. She instantly tried to smother whatever negative feeling the shadow self represents. When the other disappears, she gets a false sense of security. But a deep-rooted anxiety can’t go away that easily. Both Akali and her shadow self struggle to get away from each other only to become one. And based on the ending, Akali is going to have to fight tooth and nail for the the shadow to leave because that shadow is the corruption seeping into her very being.

There’s a tear on the shadow’s face, which suggests that the corruption started from sadness, and it even took a step back in hesitation before charging at real Akali as if it had no other choice. And the fact that the shadow self was desperate enough to be rescued to reach out to Morgana of all people speaks volumes of Akali’s state of mind. Alternatively, it could also mean that Morgana is the one manipulating things to speed up Akali’s corruption.

Here are some quotes from her Star Guardian skin:

“Star Guardians burn bright then burn out. Doesn’t anyone care?”

“Sacrificing yourself isn't noble, it just leaves the ones you love picking up the pieces.”

“Does this friendship bracelet mean nothing to her?”

And an excerpt from the Twin Stars story - Chapter 14, Faltering Perspective:

“I think I get it,” Akali said, only half lying. “But, Kai’Sa, don’t shut me out next time. You can rely on me, too.” Kai’Sa nodded, but Akali shook her head. “Promise me.”

Akali lifted her finger, and Kai’Sa hooked it with her pinky, the petals of their pink and blue forget-me-not bracelets glittering in the starlight. “I promise, Akali.”

A small part of Akali worried that this was a promise Kai’Sa was going to break, another opportunity for Kai’Sa to pick Akali over herself. But Akali held onto that moment, their promise, regardless, even as she tried to forget all that had happened. All that had changed.

Akali buried her pain deep inside, where a tendril of darkness unfurled within the chasm in her heart.

And a few lines from the event:

Akali: You want me to work with Zoe? Do you not remember what she did?!

...

Akali: I don’t know what you saw. Obviously something different from what I saw.

Akali: I watched a paddle star destroy my old neighborhood. A building collapsed next to me with people still inside. I saw a Star Guardian actually die.

Akali: You saw... what? Lux saving the city? Being a big hero, getting a statue? They left us, Kai’Sa.

Akali: The old guardians are all gone. All of them! They left us here to do this ourselves, and now, I...

Akali: I am being hunted and tortured by... that thing. I can’t even go home at night by myself. I hear it everywhere. It’s following me!

...

Akali: Your obsession with being a Star Guardian is... I can’t deal with it anymore. Do you even care how I feel? Do you know what I see when I close my eyes?!

Akali: So many people I cared about are dead. And now there’s nothing stopping me from dying, too. And you don’t even care.

Akali: I took this stupid oath because I believed in you! You promised nothing would change!

The corruption started in Akali since she was a child. She witnessed her home get destroyed, people get killed, and found out the betrayal that happened within Ahri’s Star Guardian team. These events are engraved in Akali’s mind even years later, seeing as she doesn’t see Ahri in a good light. Not to mention that she and Kai’Sa had a fight before Xayah and Rakan’s arrival in the city. The best friends only reunited because of the chaos around them and the need to keep the other safe.

Present time: Whenever Akali is present in the client story event, her lines always involve her being angry at Kai’Sa not being able to give ample emotional support. Kai’Sa is always worrying about her role as the team leader. Akali is left to fend for herself alone. Not only does she feel like she doesn’t have anyone to count on, Fiddlesticks is also stalking her and making her life even more miserable, haunting her in every hour of the day. Morgana is there at school, always taunting them. The corruption has finally manifested with all these things happening at the same time.

She doesn’t need Kai’Sa to do heroic things to be like Lux. She just needs her.

#im rambling #i expected happy stuff w sg but nope all angst #note: i dont mean to step on toes/assume stuff regarding mental illnesses #i wanted to write about akali's struggles since the sg stories are not at all light-hearted #pls make sure to filter tw tags #headcanons #tw depression #tw depression mention #star guardian event spoilers

13 notes · View notes

dorka · 2 years

Text

Garbage Day newsletter today

Open in browser

Tumblr had a real big day yesterday

Ryan Broderick

Sep 9

Yesterday, Queen Elizabeth II died at the age of 96. To say it was a big day on the internet would be an understatement. The sheer amount of memes and shitposts generated in the last 24 hours may be more than I’ve ever seen in a single day.

I would divide those who did react to the queen’s passing into two groups: people who believed it was a serious and solemn occasion and those who, uh, did not. And I don’t think people in that first group had a very good time on social media yesterday. In fact, it turns out there were a lot of people on Twitter, in particular, that learned for the first time yesterday that the British royal family is, absolutely, a political institution and may not be as universally beloved as they had assumed.

While much of the social web was taking every chance they could to pop off a viral post, Tumblr was especially active. “Queen Elizabeth” is still the number one trending topic across the whole platform. Before we dig in here, I just want to acknowledge that today’s issue of Garbage Day is a bit dark, but I also think it’s worth pulling apart how the web has been reacting to the queen’s death because, as you’ll see, I think it says a lot about how the internet, as a whole, functions now.

To fully explain the bizarre online forces that turned the death of a 96-year-old monarch into an out of control viral frenzy on Tumblr, I think it's best to break this up into three small sections. So, first, let's talk about Tumblr's relationship to the queen.

(Tumblr)

Part 1 - Tumblr And The Queen

I was trying trace back exactly when jokes about the queen dying started on Tumblr and it’s hard to pinpoint. Though, I remember seeing memes about Tumblr users wanting to join the Irish Republican Army and create a 74-country Ireland following the Brexit vote. I know that COVID played a role, as well, with many users beginning to joke that the queen could die during the pandemic. And news reports over the last few years about her declining health only seemed to make jokes about the queen dying more frequent. Is this all super morbid? Yeah, for sure. But I can put some high level analysis on this.

There are a few things happening here. First, Tumblr is still very much an ecosystem centered on, oftentimes, extremely juvenile turf wars about social justice. The platform has mellowed out a lot since its peak in 2014, but it’s still a place where users are constantly pillorying each other over leftist and progressive issues. And I think sharing dark jokes about the death of the Queen of England was a way of keeping the peace — “yes, we may be viciously fighting with each other right now, but I think we can all agree that English colonialism is bad,” etc. Also, the Tumblr community’s relationship to news cycles is much different than what you see on Twitter. Content moves more slowly, so jokes tend to build up over time, diverging in confusing ways, and then snowballing into small cultural movements that become very sticky and immediately get mythologized into community lore. And, finally, Tumblr, since the days of Superwholock, has had a very intense anglophilic bent to it. And though it may not feel like it, I think the site collectively cheering for the death of the queen is directly tied to that.

(Paramount)

There have been a lot of variations on the general “Queen Elizabeth is going to die soon” meme across Tumblr, but I’d say the main one to be aware of was a series of screenshots from the movie Megamind. The original line reads, “There is no Easter Bunny, there is no Tooth Fairy and there is no Queen of England. This is the real world, and you need to wake up.” So users would cut off the final line as a joke and caption it, “like to charge, reblog to cast,” an illusion to using a magic spell in an RPG.

The meme got very popular after Boris Johnson resigned as prime minister of the UK in July. Now users are postin the full meme.

The site is also currently full of GIFs and uploads of the “Crab Rave” song by Noisestorm, which was first used to celebrate the death of Rush Limbaugh in 2021.

I reached out to Tumblr to see if I could get any data about exactly how big yesterday was for the platform. According to Cates Holderness, the head of editorial for the site, “Queen Elizabeth” had 403% more clicks than the second highest topic, which was Chris Pine.

“In fact, clicks to the ‘Queen Elizabeth’ tag were 518% higher than the average top-clicked tag so far in September,” Holderness told me. “As far as searches go, the top three searched topics yesterday were variations on the ‘Queen Elizabeth’ tag, and combined searches for those tags were 622% higher than the next highest searched tag, which was related to Stranger Things.”

Part 2 - The Tumblr Sexyman Bracket

Right, OK, so you’ve got all that. Let’s move to how the queen’s death is being processed among the wilder parts of the internet. To understand that you need to know about the “Tumblr Sexyman Bracket,” which wrapped up yesterday.

Twitter avatar for @sexymanOTD

Tumblr Sexyman OTD

@sexymanOTD

SEMIFINALS!!!

Image

September 7th 2022

1,052 Retweets4,985 Likes

A Twitter account called @sexymanOTD started a bracket earlier this week to decide who was the most popular Tumblr “sexyman”. This is a reference to the platform’s frequent site-wide obsession with unusual (usually) fictional men. The bracket included characters like Megamind (the site is going through a real Megamind phase right now), Loki, The Onceler, Sans from the video game Undertale, and Reigen from the anime Mob Psycho 100. Sans and Reigen ended up being the final two. And a lot of users really wanted to Reign to win because fan art of him is super popular on Tumblr right now. Sans ended up winning, unfortunately.

I say unfortunately because Sans, and the idea that people could find the cartoon skeleton “sexy,” has been a long-running joke on the site for years. Adding gasoline ot the fire, Undertale creator Toby Fox celebrated the win by writing a bunch of fan fiction about it yesterday.

(Tumblr/serslee)

What does this have to do with the queen? Well, ever since the #Destiel ship from Supernatural was made canon on the eve of the 2020 US presidential election, the Tumblr community has been obsessed with the idea of a weird fandom thing happening at the same time as a massive global news story breaks. Users now use screenshots from Supernatural to announce breaking news to each other.

Now, we need to look at how Tumblr trends began to interact with trends happening outside the platform.

Part 3 - The Conspiracy Theory That Princess Diana Was Reincarnated as Jungkook From BTS

As it became clear that queen had died yesterday, internet users also noticed that YouTuber Trish Paytas was giving birth. Immediately, folks on Twitter, TikTok, and Tumblr started joking that the queen would be reincarnated as Paytas’ baby. This is probably the least unhinged example of the memes I’ve seen about this.

Twitter avatar for @trulyrick

rick

@trulyrick

The soul of Queen Elizabeth flying across the globe to Trisha Paytas’ baby rn

Image

September 8th 2022

41,939 Retweets324,466 Likes

Interestingly enough, as pointed out by Twitter user @mitsukileaks, there was already a conspiracy theory on K-Pop Twitter from a while back that Princess Diana was reincarnated as Jeon Jung-kook from BTS.

This is where things get sort interesting from a technical standpoint and also wildly confusing. Because the queen died, Princess Diana also started trending. Which then caused “Jung Kook” to trend, as well. Similarly, because, as I said, Tumblr users make jokes about breaking news events by using screencaps from the show Supernatural, that too started to trend alongside “Queen Elizabeth” on tumblr.

So we end up with this utterly bizarre algorithmic confluence of different, but linked memes happening simultaneously around one news topic: Queen Elizabeth, Princess Diana, Trish Paytas, Jungkook from BTS, Sans from Undertale, Reigen from the anime Mob Psycho 100, the movie Megamind, the #Destiel ship from Supernatural, and, of course, crabs are all trending because of each other across Tumblr, Twitter, Instagram, and TikTok via their own community’s memes as well as screenshots of the other plarforms’ memes. And none of this is linear. It’s old memes combining with new memes, which all still currently evolving.

What’s even funnier is that a lot of outlets have done recaps of some of this this morning. So news organizations are trying to explain the Paytas connection or the crap rave thing, but there are a lot of outlets that can’t or don’t want to explain any of this stuff because it’s too dumb or too weird or whatever, but they still want the search traffic. Which is how you end up with the US edition of the British news outlet The Sun having a literal liveblog waiting to find out if Paytas’ baby’s name is Elizabeth or not. Which, if you weren’t on social media in the last 24 hours and didn’t know the whole joke about the queen being reincarnated would be utter gibberish.

Epilogue - This Meme Should Make Sense To You Now

(Tumblr/tiptapricot)

There are a lot of posts like this flying around right now, but I thought this one from Tumblr user tiptapricot was kind of the best example of the general state of the internet at the moment. There’s a few other references in there to just general Tumblr stuff, which, if you don’t get, you can always email me and ask about.

The point with all of these things is that because we have these centralized online feeds like Tumblr, Twitter, Instagram, and TikTok, big cultural moments are still getting compressed down into streams of information. But we also have pretty heavily fractured experiences of those centralized platforms. So massive global news stories get filtered through really strange prisms where no one’s really in charge of them anymore.

So, 10 years ago, an event like this would have happened and chances are you would have gone to your favorite news site and read a tweet roundup about it. Or maybe you waited until the evening news or maybe even the next morning’s radio show or something. Now, there’s just simply too much to recap. And too many recaps to parse. Which makes memes the main way we express and process things now. Nothing else can really cut through. And there’s probably no way we ever go back to the way things were. So if you found yourself yesterday — on any platform — wishing for people to be a little more respectful. Or a little less chaotic. Or wanted the headlines to be a little more organized. Or just wanted things to slow down. I kind of have some bad news for

4 notes · View notes

bestiesenpai · 3 years

Text

youtuber Sukuna

I beg you to read the shitposts I made about this, they are delicious. You don’t have to of course but...if you loved me you would :) s/n = screen name, and I hope you chuckle at Sukunas screen name

Content warning: uhmhm lowkey incel shit(mean internet comments and whatnot)

part two --- part 3

Name: Sukuna. Age: 25. Height: 6 foot 5 inches. Occupation: toxic Youtuber, fitness trainer and hot guy.

Sukuna wasn’t exactly known for being kind. He wasn’t nice to others, rarely having anything good to say about anyone, and he’d made a successful Youtube career out of it. First starting as a fitness trainer at his gym, through encouragement from his clients and the notion of a quick cash grab, he started Youtube.

He didn’t care about it and that reflected in the quality of his videos and editing. He didn’t have consistent uploads, just filming and posting videos whenever he wanted, analytics be fucked. But somehow, that worked out for him, and he quickly found himself with over two million subscribers just frothing at the mouth for his next video.

And those subscribers were some of the worst people. Sukuna didn’t care about fostering a safe space online for others, not in the slightest. His comment sections were atrocious, both on his Youtube and his Instagram. It was full of toxic men one-upping each other constantly and dragging on each other for not being able to work out as much as Sukuna did.

Sukuna was a large part of why his fanbase were so toxic. He himself often made bad comments about others, whether fellow creators or people that happened to appear in the backgrounds of his videos, and on more than one occasion he’d been ‘cancelled’. None of that mattered though, all he cared about was shitting on other people and making money.

Sometimes he played video games and posted it, but not too often. Sukuna often stated he wasn’t so much of a fucking lonely loser that he’d play video games all the time, and so the gaming videos he did post were few and far between. He played angry shooter games and GTA, mindless button clicking he could get lost in for a few hours for a video.

Laying in bed one night after uploading his most recent video, one where he rages at 12 year olds on GTA online, Sukuna was just scrolling through his phone mindlessly. After he uploads video game content, like clockwork, he gets recommendations for gaming channels. He only watches a few of them, mostly leaving mean comments saying what losers they are, but one catches his eye.

He’s never been recommended this kind of video before. The thumbnail is light and bright with some pink aesthetic lights in the back. But the most enticing thing is the person in the middle, cute pink cat ear headphones on and a bright smile.

“Let’s see…” Sukuna mumbles to himself, mindlessly clicking the video. He hasn’t even read the title, he only clicked it because they were cute, and here he is nearly blinded by the bright setup they have.

“Hi everyone, it’s (Y/N) here and I’m really excited today! We’re going to be playing this new game I found!” Sukuna is immediately enraptured by the sound of your voice, watching how your face changes as you talk. His eyes drift off to the decor behind you, cute plushies and healthy plants, and some twinkling fairy lights. There’s books as well, and your chair is one of those ergonomic gamer chairs he has as well but in pink.

Sukuna watches the video dumbly, totally in the dark about whatever you’re doing, but loving it all the same. All he knows is that he likes the sound of your voice, and when you laugh and smile at a funny part in the game, it makes a light flush come to his cheeks.

It only takes one video for Sukuna to spiral into more of your content. He watches a video on your gaming setup, and he’s surprised that so much technology can come in pink. He watches a video on how you edit, a few of you cooking in your kitchen, and even a few vlog videos.

He quickly subscribes to your channel, and when you plug your social media, he immediately goes there. Pulling up your Instagram, he stares at your profile picture and almost audibly coos at you for being cute.

Your profile is just as cute as your videos are and Sukuna barely remembers to follow you before he’s going through your whole feed, liking every picture he sees. Sometimes he leaves comments, only one word though, ‘cute’. He’s never liked something so outright cute before, it wasn’t who he was and it definitely didn’t fit with his brand.

Falling asleep after following you on every platform, Sukuna wakes up thinking about you as well. And he also wakes up to hundreds of comments from all his accounts, bombarding him with questions and screenshots from last night.

‘SUKUNA WHY WOULD YOU LIKE THIS SHIT?!’

‘OMG Sukuna liked (Y/N)s posts!!’

‘Sukuna is so gross and toxic, you better stay away from (Y/N)!’

‘SUKUNA YOU GAY NOW’

‘EW why the fuck do you like this bitch?’

There were hundreds of comments that he waded through. Most were from his fans, expressing disgust at how many photos of yours he’d liked and wondering why he, Sukuna, most heterosexual alpha male on the planet, would like a pretty in pink Youtuber who had bubbly intros and whined when their animal crossing villagers wanted to move away.

Other comments were from your fans, some in awe that he would like you considering how much he said he hated overly cute things. Other fans expressed concern, worried what this might mean for their favorite Youtuber. Did Sukuna want to cause problems, potentially hurting you? He did have a reputation of bullying others, so this wasn’t far fetched.

Checking your Instagram, you didn’t make any comment about it. There wasn’t any update or anything, but on his end he was being tagged in endless Twitter threads with screenshots of him liking your posts and commenting under them.

“For fucks sake.” He grunted, clenching his phone in his hands. The amount of notifications he was getting were starting to upset him and he nearly threw his phone to get them to stop.

Ignoring his phone for the rest of the day, Sukuna went to the gym like he always did and trained with his clients. Some of them brought it up to him, asking him if he had a mind break last night and forgot what he was doing. Sending them harsh glares, Sukuna refused to talk about it.

“Oh my fucking god.” Sukuna nearly wailed when he got home, finally checking his phone. His name and yours had begun trending, and the hashtag #protect(Y/N) was also. Muttering angrily under his breath, Sukuna turned on Instagram live.

“Okay what the fuck!” He shouted, seeing the live become instantly flooded with people all screaming about you and him. “You’re all fucking annoying, you know that?” Glaring harshly at the camera, he read some of the comments that went by.

‘WHY’D YOU LIKE (Y/N)S POSTS FROM 2017’

‘Are you two secretly dating??’

‘COLLAB!’

“Who gives a shit why I liked their stuff, you’re a fucking weirdo for keeping track of me. And we aren’t secretly dating, dipshits.” Rolling his eyes, Sukuna scoffed as more comments came in begging for a collaboration. “And think about it you morons, why would we collab? Our shit is too fucking different, what would we even film about?”

Sukuna stayed on Instagram live for nearly an hour answering questions asking about you. Every time he had to answer that you weren’t secretly dating, he got a little more annoyed. Not at the comments themselves but at the fact that it was true; you didn’t even know he existed.

Ending the live in a huff, Sukuna didn’t feel any better than before, and it was made even worse by the fact that everything he said was being relayed to Twitter, and you were tagged in every tweet.

“These idiots!” Staring at his phone, Sukuna couldn’t believe what he was seeing. On your Instagram stories, you’d posted a q&a for your followers, and nearly all of the comments were about Sukuna.

“Hi everyone! No, me and Sukuna aren’t dating!” You said, laughing a little to ease how uncomfortable you were. “To be honest, I’ve never even heard of him before! As you know, my content is very...different from his, so our circles don’t exactly intersect. But I’m always happy to have new followers and potential friends!”

“Fuck me.” Sukuna groaned, cringing at how uncomfortable you looked having to address the sudden onslaught of questions. For once he wished he’d actually given a shit about his online presence, so that maybe one day your circles could intersect. He knew he scared you, he scared a lot of people, and this was just proof.

“Uh, Sukuna if you see this, hi it’s nice to meet you!” You said in the next slide, puffing out your cheeks and waving cutely at the camera. It made Sukuna blush, and he hated it. “Thank you for following me and liking my content! I was very surprised that you found me!”

“Of course I did, idiot, you’re fucking cute.” He muttered under his breath.

“I know a lot of people are asking for us to do a video together and I know our content is really different, so don’t feel pressured to respond or anything, but the offer is open! If you’d like, we can collab on something.”

“On what?” He asked like you were there.

“I cook sometimes, and I know you cook too! Maybe we can make a cooking video? You can teach me how to make healthy food or something!” Sukuna could tell a fake laugh when he heard one, and you definitely had one right now. “Anyways, thank you! Bye Sukuna!” But hearing you say his name cutely like that made him not care.

He nearly responded right away, accepting the collab offer now that you’d spoken about it, but he didn’t want to seem desperate. He watched through the rest of your Instagram stories, going back and replaying the parts where you talked about him over and over and his heart clenched every time when you said his name.

In the dead of night, Sukuna DM’s you after watching your latest video and leaving the simple comment ‘check your DM’s’.

“Fuck, what should I say?” He’s suddenly stumped as he looks at the keyboard. Typing and retyping a message, in the end all he can say is hi. He doesn’t expect a reply, ever, but when he gets a vibration on his phone two seconds later he jumps to read it.

(S/N): hi Sukuna! :)

(cursedgod): hey

Real fucking smart, repeating what he just said.

(S/N): is there something you wanted to talk to me about?

(S/N): I hope you haven’t been annoyed at all the notifications you’ve been getting!

(cursedgod): No it’s okay

(cursedgod): we can collab if you want

Good Sukuna, good. Play it cool, don’t let them know that your fingers are actually trembling because you’re nervous.

(S/N): do you want to?? I don’t want to pressure you! I know we’re pretty different haha

(cursedgod): yeah, let's do it. Cooking?

(S/N): sure!

Looking around his home, he was suddenly assaulted with the fact that he didn’t have any furniture. He barely had a proper bedroom, just a mattress on a bare frame and a dresser. His lounge room was the same with his computer setup in one corner and then nothing else. There was only a couch, a mounted TV and a fold out table and chairs for his dining room.

(cursedgod): I know a studio kitchen we can use, I’ll send you the address

Thank god he’d done promo work for a brand in a studio one day, otherwise he’d be fucked.

(S/N): awesome! I’m free next Saturday!

And just like that, it was a date. Well, a meeting. Sukuna knew it wasn’t a date, but his heart still thumped like it was one. Confirming the time, he ended the conversation with a curt goodbye and obsessed about it throughout the night.

When the day to meet you came, Sukuna nearly ran late trying to pick out his clothes. He’d never cared about looking good or presenting himself well in front of others, whatever version of him he turned up in was what they got. But for you, he wanted to try a little harder.

Waiting outside the studio space, Sukuna rubbed his hands together nervously. You’d messaged a day or two ago offering to put the video on your channel since it probably wouldn’t fit his aesthetic, so he didn’t have to bring his shitty camera equipment.

“S-sukuna?” Snapping his head up, Sukunas mouth fell open looking at your curious face a few feet away, an Uber driving off behind you. You were even cuter in person, just his fucking luck. How was he expected to act like a normal person when his recent obsession was here looking better than he could have imagined.

“Hi.” What comes out is a grunt, not the smooth word he’d hoped. He can see you eyeing him up, taking in all the thick and corded muscles of his body. It made his chest puff out a little, he worked hard for this physique and to have you so openly looking at him made him happy.

“It’s nice to meet you!” Sticking your hand out, you smiled politely at him.

“Same.” Shaking your hand with a firm grip, Sukuna could feel the difference in your palms. Yours was soft and nicely moisturized and he had callouses everywhere and a few cuts and scrapes.

Opening the door for you, Sukuna led you to the studio space he’d rented out. It was a clean and modern kitchen, not unlike his own, but it had appliances and looked actually lived in. Helping you set up a few camera angles, Sukuna felt a pang of nerves hit him in the stomach.

“Sukuna, can we take a picture together?” You asked before starting, and Sukunas brow furrowed deeply. Why would you want to take a picture with him? His expression must have scared you, because you quickly backtracked. “F-for promo for this video, on Instagram and stuff!”

“Sure.” God, did he feel bad or what. He shouldn’t have made that face at you, now you wouldn’t look him in the eye. Crouching down to get the right angle for you, Sukuna watched you pick a cute animal filter.

“Just do what I do.” Throwing up a peace sign, you cutely tilted your head from side to side and smiled. Sukuna tried to do the same but he looked awkward, and most of all he was blushing pretty bad.

You snapped a multitude of pictures, some at different angles and some with different filters, and in all of them Sukuna was blushing at least a little. He managed to smile more as it went on, even laughing at one of the filters.

“Thanks! I’m going to post these really quick and then we can get started!” Giving him a brief smile, you turned back to your phone and set about editing some of the pictures. Looking over your shoulder, Sukuna could see that he looked like a blushing high schooler meeting their idol for the first time and not a grown man.

Once the photos were posted and you tagged him in everything, it was time to start. Setting up your marks on the floor, you took a generous drink of water and cleared your throat.

“Are you ready for the intro? I’ll start it and introduce you, okay?” You’d actually prepared a script for yourself, and showed Sukuna as well.

“Okay.” Stepping in front of the camera, Sukuna bristled at feeling you so close to him. Your arm brushed his casually as you were fixing your shirt, and Sukuna was glad he’d worn his most expensive cologne for this.

“Hi everyone, welcome to today's video! As you know, I’m (Y/N), and today we have a special guest today!” Throwing your arms in the air, you motioned to Sukuna.

“Hi.” He nodded, barely cracking a smile. He could feel you looking at him like you wanted to say something, but he didn’t look.

“So, many people have been asking for us to do a collaboration and it’s finally here!” Clapping your hands lightly, you rocked on your heels and nudged his shoulder with yours. “Do you want to tell them what we’ll be doing today?”

“Uh-” The playful nudge you’d given him was enough to make Sukuna short circuit. “I-I-” He suddenly couldn’t remember how to speak. “Rice?”

“Let’s try that again.” You laughed. “Do you want to tell them what we’ll be doing today?” This time, you didn’t nudge him with your shoulder.

“We’re gonna…” the words were on the tip of his tongue, they wanted to come out and be spoken but he couldn’t do it.

“It’s okay, it’s okay!” Nodding reassuringly, you took a deep breath in and out, and Sukuna shakily copied. “One more try?” When he looked at you, Sukuna expected to see a hint of annoyance in your face, but there was none. You were just smiling softly at him, waiting for his answer.

“Yeah. I’ll uh, I’ll get it next time.” Stepping away from the camera, Sukuna took a drink of water and cleared his throat. Cracking the bones in his neck, he took a deep breath and came back. “Let’s do it.” No more fucking embarrassments.

“Do you want to tell them what we’ll be doing today?” You asked for the third time, slightly swaying your body side to side this time.

“We’re gonna make katsudon today.” Finally, the words he wanted to say came out.

“That’s right! As you can see, Sukuna is really fit!” You immediately hopped in, giving his arm a brief squeeze. “And he knows how to make a ton of healthy meals!”

“Mhmm.”

“So I asked if he could help teach me, and all of you at home, how to make it!” Smiling at the camera, you waited a few seconds before relaxing and turning it off. “Did you like that? We can refilm it if you want.”

“No, it’s okay.” Running a hand through his hair, he pointed to the bag of rice he’d brought. “Let’s get started on this shit.”

Taking fifteen minutes to film the two of you filling up the rice cooker, when it was over, you set about getting aesthetic shots of the other ingredients. Sukuna tried to seem casual off to the side on his phone, but he was really watching you.

Getting started on chopping the ingredients, Sukuna somehow managed to say the things he was supposed to without stuttering too badly. He was amazed that you could make the things he was doing sound so interesting, your narration as you held the camera and tried to do things yourself was impressive to the man that barely knew anything about cameras.

“Sukuna, I need help cutting the meat.” You whined, tapping the meat on the cutting board with a knife. “I don’t remember how you showed me.”

“Here.” Without thinking, Sukuan grabbed your hand with the knife in it and moved it for you. “You just have to move your wrist more, it’s not that hard.” Doing it a few times, when Sukuna felt your chest expand with air against his, that’s when he realized how close the two of you were. “S-sorry.” Immediately jumping back, he stared at the floor.

“Thanks!” Giving him a smile, you kept at it.

“I’ll fry the meat.” Stepping in as soon as you were done, Sukuna already had the hot oil ready. He was eager to cook and do something with his hands instead of - what he felt like - was awkwardly watching you off to the side.

“Okay!” Grabbing the camera, you focused on the pan. “You’re really good at this, Sukuna!”

“T-thanks.” Staring directly at the pan, Sukuna didn’t look away. Even with the hot oil popping up from the pan a few times and burning his fingers, he didn’t flinch at all.

“Ow!” But you did. Your hand had gotten too close, and when Sukuna flipped the meat, some of the oil had gotten on your hand.

“Shit.” Abandoning the pan, Sukuna was ready to drag you over to the sink for some cool water.

“I-it’s okay, it was only a little.” Shaking your stinging hand, you point to the food. “But I think the meat might burn.”

“Shit!”

Narrowly avoiding disaster with the meat, when it came time to cook the eggs, you made a joke about how you liked your eggs in the morning and Sukuna burnt them almost immediately. While not an overtly sexual comment, the implications of the words still affected him.

Somehow, he managed to make the dish come together and while his plated dish didn’t come out the best, yours looked at least halfway decent with overcooked meat and burnt eggs. The only things not messed up were the rice and vegetables, and even then Sukuna was surprised.

“We did it everyone, we made katsudon!” Holding up the bowls, you smiled big and nudged Sukunas shoulder again. “You saw we had a few mishaps along the way, but that’s okay, that’s what made it fun.”

“Yeah, it was fun.” Sukuna chuckled. Despite him being more nervous than he’d ever thought possible, he had fun cooking alongside you.

“Sukuna, will you try mine? I made it super pretty and everything.” Holding your dish up to him, Sukuna wasn’t expecting you to do that. Now he felt bad that his looked so ugly and like a teenaged boy made it; he almost said no.

Eating yours though, somehow it tasted better than he was expecting. It must have been how you prepared it, and the fact that you cared so much about the presentation. Eating it in silence, he let you eat in peace as well for a few minutes and compliment the food to the camera.

“Alright, that’s the end of the video!” Putting your bowl down, you turned to Sukuna. “I had so much fun today, thanks for filming this with me.” Now was his chance to make everything better. Putting his bowl down and bolstering himself with confidence, Sukuna threw his arm over your shoulder and pulled you close to him.

“Thank you (Y/N), I really did enjoy today. I hope we can film again soon!” He squeezed your shoulder and smiled really big at not only you but the camera as well. He knew he was blushing, he knew that even the tip of his nose was a nice rosy shade, but he didn’t care. If people teased him for it, then so be it. But he wanted you to know how he truly felt.

“R-really? You want to?” You asked, looking up at Sukuna from your place smooshed against his body.

“Really.”

“Aww, well you heard it here first everyone! Sukuna wants to shoot another video with me!” Clapping your hands a few times, you waved at the camera. “Okay, bye everyone!”

“Bye.” Sukuna waved too, waiting a few seconds before letting you go and turning off the camera.

“Sukuna, did you really mean it? You want to film another video with me?” You were in utter disbelief. All this time, he’d just seemed very standoffish, if not a little awkward around you. You were happy to film this video with him, he had way more followers than you and it would help boost both your channels, and to hear him say that just made it even better.

“Yeah, I was serious.” Sukuna spoke around stuffing his mouth with the food he still had left. He was more hungry than he thought, the nerves doing a good job of twisting his stomach during the video. Now that it’s over, he can finally relax.

“That makes me really happy.” Eating the rest of your food as well, you leant against the counter. “This is gonna sound kind of mean, but I was really scared to film with you today. I thought you were going to be really mean.”

“Shit, you did?” He grimaced, letting out a sigh. “Sorry I had you worried.” He could already imagine the comments you would get from his fans.

“It’s okay! You’re actually way nicer in person, I was surprised!”

“That’s good.”

“And you’re really buff, you have muscles in places I didn’t even know were possible!” You laughed bashfully at that comment, and avoided looking at him when he stared at you in shock. “I couldn’t help but notice…”

Were you checking him out? Had you been checking him out this whole time and he didn’t even realize? He had seen you eyeing him up when you first met, but were you looking at him like that at other times as well? Now he’d really have to watch your video to see if it was true.

“Thanks, it’s my job.” Could he have said that any lamer? “My job outside of all this, I mean. I’m a trainer at this fancy gym downtown.”

“Oh, I’ve seen some of your videos at your gym! I know which one you’re talking about.”

“You do? You’ve seen my videos?” If he wasn’t surprised before, he was now.

“Yeah, you know I had to do a little research beforehand.” You nodded, beginning to clean up the dishes around you. “And I know you’ve already watched almost all of my videos, so it only seemed fair.”

Did you have to bring that up? Now Sukuna was embarrassed again.

“Y-yeah, I did.” Clearing his throat, Sukuna helped gather the dishes. He took up washing them, another task he could do to get his mind off you. As you took down the camera equipment, he nearly broke several dishes and utensils from scrubbing too hard.

“I’ll call you an Uber.” He said when all was said and done and you were back at the front of the building.

“You don’t have to, it’s okay.”

“No, I want to.” Quickly calling you a ride, Sukuna fiddled with his phone a little more. “Uh, could I- could I-” His voice kept leaving him, and he had to cough a few times. “Can I get your number? I really liked your camera shit and I want to improve mine.” Okay, it wasn’t a total lie. He did like your setup and wanted to make his just as good, but he really wanted your number to potentially talk to you more about things outside of Youtube.

“Sure! Go ahead and type it in.” You were quick to give him your phone, a cute pink phone case on the back of it. Typing it in, he can’t help but notice the little devil emoji you add by his name. He wants to ask, but your ride is already pulling up.

“Bye!” Setting all your camera gear inside the car, you turn and wave goodbye.

“See ya.” Just as you’re about to close the car door, Sukuna gets a burst of confidence. “Text me when you get home, okay?”

“Okay!” And off you go. Sukuna watches the car drive off until he can’t see it anymore. He takes his time getting to his own place, eagerly awaiting your message with every step. But even when you do message him, all he can do is send a thumbs up back and nothing else.

It’s about two and a half days after that that you text him again, letting him know you’re done editing and that you’re going to post the video soon. It wasn’t a very long video to begin with, so the editing was simple enough. Sukuna replied with what appeared to be a lackluster ‘can’t wait’, but on the inside he was shaking. He’d already screenshot all the pictures the two of you took together and added them to a folder.

“Here we go.” As soon as the video went live, Sukuna watched it. He was mortified as soon as it started at the blush so evident on his cheeks, and how it stayed throughout the whole thing. He groaned at the part where he helped you cut up the meat, he almost wishes you’d cut it out. Every little detail that made him embarrassed was there, every little nuance of his actions you’d managed to capture and make it cute.

(Y/N): How do you like it??

You texted him after twenty minutes, eager to hear his thoughts.

(Sukuna): it’s good, good editing and stuff

(Y/N): yay! I’m going to read comments in a few hours, you should too! I bet people will be really shocked!

(Sukuna): yeah no doubt

Oh, he was definitely going to read the comments. Whereas you were going to wait for a fair few to come in before commenting, Sukuna frequently refreshed the page and read the new ones as they came in. You were right, a lot of people were surprised, but he also saw a lot of his fans as well.

‘Ew Sukuna really cooked for that bitch? They can’t do it themselves?’

‘Yeah, why do they have to rely on him? Useless as fuck lol’

‘Sukuna only did this to get laid, (Y/N) looks like an easy fuck’

All of those comments, and many more, made his blood boil. Usually, he wouldn’t care at all about the comments, letting them fester in his comment section and spiral out of control. But for you, it was different.

‘Fuck off and die you pieces of shit. Leave (Y/N) alone or say it to my fucking face’

Sukuna sent that message, along with a variety of other threats, to all the people that insulted you. He didn’t care that this wasn’t his channel and that you would deal with it in whatever way you wanted to. He needed to defend you against the unwanted audience he’d brought you.

Luckily, after seeing Sukunas messages, all of his fans backed off. They knew how serious he was about his threats and there were many rumors that he actually did go and beat people up who said things he didn’t like. No one wanted to be on the receiving end of his torment.

With Sukunas name attached to the video and his heavy presence in the comment section, the video easily went viral. It was easily the most viewed video on your channel, getting on the trending pages of several different platforms.

(Sukuna): hey

It’s nearly a week after the first video that Sukuna messages you, and the hype is still going strong, and your follower count grows greatly from it.

(Y/N): hi! What’s up?

(Sukuna): do you want to film a video for my channel now? We can play a game, I have a few

(Y/N): sure that sounds fun!

Oh how wrong you were. The game Sukuna chose was a scary game, a shooter game with scary zombies and a lot of possible jumpscares. He doesn’t tell you either, so on the night of filming - he insisted on it being nighttime to get the full scary effect - you were caught off guard.

“I don’t know about this.” You whined once you saw the title. The two of you were video calling alongside playing the game together, and Sukuna’s eyes flicked to your figure on the screen.

“It’ll be okay, I’ll carry you, don’t worry.” He had started filming as soon as he’d set up the game, and you were filming yourself as well for him.

“You promise it won’t be too scary?”

“If it’s too scary just close your eyes and I’ll protect you.” Smiling softly at you, he started up the game. The beginning was fine, just a quick introduction to the game, but as soon as things started to get moving, you were scared.

“Sukuna a zombie is eating me!” You screamed, frantically pushing buttons in an attempt to get it off.

“It’s okay!” He quickly got rid of it, and made sure to stay close to your character as the story progressed.

“(Y/N) stay by me, there’s about to be a whole lot of them.”

“Close your eyes there’s about to be a jump scare here.”

“Don’t worry about getting that item, I’ll grab it for you!”

Sukuna nearly forgot he was being filmed, saying sweet things to you to help encourage you and make sure you weren’t overwhelmed. There were many parts where you screamed in fright and Sukuna was there to coo at you and tell you it was okay. He made sure that your character never died, making sure to keep you close until the end of the game.

“Sukuna, that was so hard!” Squishing your cheeks in your hands, you looked at him through your phone.

“It was fun though, wasn’t it? I had fun with you.” Completely abandoning the game, he stared down at his phone with a soft smile on his face.

“Yeah, when there weren’t so many zombies.” You stuck your tongue out at him, and it made him laugh. Leaning his head into his hand, Sukuna grinned when you yawned.

“Aw, are you tired? Better go to sleep soon.” His voice dropped to a lower volume, like you were right next to him.

“I will.” You yawned again and it made Sukuna yawn as well.

“Get off the phone and go to bed, you’re making me tired too.”

“Fine.” Whining out the word, you waved sleepily. “Goodnight Sukuna, I’ll send you the video files in the morning, okay?”

“Night.” Waving back, Sukuna waited until you hung up to turn his stuff off as well.

In the morning, Sukuna was ready to edit. What usually took him a week to edit out of laziness, he took only a day to edit this video with you together. Rewatching the footage, he nearly gagged at seeing how soft his face got when he looked at you, and most of those parts were left in because he couldn’t stand to watch them and fix them.

(Sukuna): videos up

The next day, he messaged you. Once again Sukuna patrolled the comments, swiftly deleting any that said even a hint of a bad thing about you. There was less this time, what with Sukuna adding a warning at the beginning of the video threatening anyone that talked down at you.

This video, like the first, went viral. But for a much different reason. Since Sukuna was emotionally unable to deal with how sappy he was and edit those parts out, everyone got to see how soft he was for you. If the comments weren’t mean, they were screaming about how you and Sukuna must be dating now, because why else would he look at you and talk to you like that?

And much to Sukuna’s dismay, there were also fancam edits of you two together. Any clippable moment of him being sweet on you in the videos you’d made together along with the photos you’d posted on Instagram were edited together and posted on Twitter. You both were tagged in every single one, making sure Sukuna saw all the videos of you and him together. He saved all of them too, delighting in the way you looked with him with all those pretty filters.

By the end of the day, people were trying to put a ship name together for the two of you and he’s seen you repost a few fancams with cute messages of thanks as well. Seeing you receptive to the fans screaming about the two of you made him happy, even if he was still too nervous to text you about anything outside of Youtube.

As more comments came in, people on Twitter were begging him to do a vlog with you. You had quite a few on your channel, going to cafes or filming what your day or week was like. Sukuna had watched them all and was jealous of every single person that appeared alongside you.

(Y/N): hey I’m doing a live on Instagram if you want to join me! I know people really like us together lol it’ll be great for views

(Sukuna): sure

Did you want him to join now? He’d just gotten out of the shower and thrown on a pair of sweats, he wasn’t exactly decent. But he didn’t want to waste time getting ready only for you to end the live.

“Hi Sukuna!” You smiled and waved when he appeared on the screen.

“Hey.” He waved back, not caring about the angle he was holding the camera in. He saw hearts begin to fill up the screen and comments started to fly by, almost all in caps about the fact he was shirtless talking to you.

“Guys, don’t be weird! Who cares that Sukuna is shirtless?” You tried to stop them, but it was clear you were flustered as well. You weren’t looking at him, peeking at him through the screen a few times.

“God you’re all thirsty as fuck.” Sukuna finally looked at himself on the screen. He was shirtless and in bed, hair slightly damp and tousled on his pillow. Reading a few comments, he shot up. “Of course I’m wearing pants, you nasty fuck!” Storming out of bed, he stood in front of the only mirror in his house that wasn’t in the bathroom and turned the camera around. “See, look!”

“Oh.” Gasping softly, you were glad Sukuna didn’t notice you screenshot the live. Clad in only gray sweatpants, Sukuna’s freshly cleaned skin gleamed in the light of his bedroom and every single muscle and edge of his body was on display.

“There, told you I wasn’t fucking naked.” Rolling his eyes, he flopped back down on the bed. None of the comments had gotten any better, all of them talking about how hot he was and how you were so lucky to know him in real life.

“L-let's talk about something else.” You stammered, not showing your face on camera for a few minutes. Sukuna laughed at the comments teasing you for being embarrassed, agreeing with some of them under his breath.

“So, what the fuck are you all doing here?” Sukuna posed the question at the chat, but at you as well.

“Well before you came everyone was talking about you...and you know how everyone has been begging for us to vlog?” You started off slowly, peeking an eye at his face.

“Yeah?”

“I wanted to call you to ask how you felt about that?” How he felt? Why did you want to know?

“You couldn’t have texted me that?” That wasn’t necessarily what he wanted to say, but it made you chuckle, so it was okay.

“No! I wanted to ask so everyone could know!”

“I don’t mind it.” If you wanted to vlog with him, he would do it in a heartbeat.

“So…” Worrying your lip, you looked off camera for a few seconds before looking directly at Sukuna. “Would you like to be in a vlog with me, at a cafe? It’s outside the city, kind of far, but we can rent a car or-”

“Yes.” Sukuna interrupted, nodding his head quickly. “I’ll come. We don’t have to rent a car, I’ll drive.”

“Really?” The comments were just as shocked as you were. Sukuna never filmed anywhere but his home and the gym, this would be a monumental occasion.

“Did you want me to say no?”

“No!” You screamed immediately, nearly dropping your phone. “I just- I wasn’t expecting you to say yes!”

“Well I did.” Sukuna bit his lip, running a hand through his hair and flexing his arm. “So I guess it’s a date, huh?” His normal asshole confidence was back now that you were appearing through a screen and not right next to him. A surprised sound came from the back of your throat, and you nearly dropped the phone again.

“Y-yeah! A date!” It felt good to have you flustered for once and not Sukuna. Laughing heartily at you, Sukuna smirked at the comments.

“Was that all you wanted to ask me or was there something more?”

“No, that was it!”

“Alright.” Licking his lip and letting his tongue hang out of his mouth a little, Sukuna watched you bite your lip as well. “Well I’m gonna go, I got stuff to do, but I’ll text you later (Y/N).” Dropping his voice as he said goodbye, Sukuna left the livestream.

“Holy fuck.” As soon as his phone was off, Sukuna let out a breath he’d been holding in. His heart was pounding hard despite how confident he was in his actions. Flirting was nothing new to him, but with you it felt different and like he’d never done it before in his life.

He watched the rest of your livestream while he finished getting ready for bed, laughing at the comments still teasing you about getting flustered with him. The notifications for Twitter were going off as well, and he knew for sure that there were new fancams for him to check out later.

(Y/N): Sukuna!! You’re so embarrassing!

Texting him after your stream, your cheeks were still burning at the memory.

(Sukuna): hey, you said it would be good for views and it was

(Y/N): I know…

(Y/N): did you really mean it, about coming with me?

(Sukuna): of course. If I didn’t want to I would have said no

(Y/N): that’s good lol!

There was a lull in conversation, and Sukuna nearly fell asleep waiting for you to either text him again or for him to figure out what to say next.

(Y/N): so, a date huh? Are you going to bring me flowers?

Now he was awake. He didn’t expect you to bring that up again, and his eyes flew open. Sukuna’s fingers hovered over the keyboard, mind going blank on what to say.

(Y/N): lol just kidding! I know you only said that for the stream! I’ll text you later about the details, I’m about to knock out

(Y/N): goodnight :)

Well shit. Now he definitely wanted it to be a date.

#jujutsu kaisen #ryomen sukuna #sukuna x reader #jujutsu kaisen fluff #jujutsu kaisen fanfic #jujutsu kaisen imagines #jujutsu kaisen scenarios

974 notes · View notes

cheri-translates · 3 years

Text

Headcanon - What he can teach you

Original title: 他能教你的

Original writer: 池离子 (chi li zi)

The principles he tells you and the knowledge he teaches you - they are all his love for you.

His love comes in the form of enabling you to fly independently.

[ VICTOR ]

You’ve never understood why Victor is always so strict with you, such as poking holes in your proposals. He not only gives you incredibly difficulty work, but also an incredibly short amount of time to complete them.

It’s ridiculous. Despite your numerous protests, he still leaves you with the work. He isn’t even willing to give you ideas on how to make amendments. Occasionally, when you make too many objections, he’d prepare your favourite pudding to placate you, and then return to his usual sternness.

Sometimes, you think that he doesn’t love you. All he sees is work.

“Victor... why are you like this? When other CEOs date, they love pampering their girlfriends. They won’t let her experience any trouble or tiredness. Why are you the complete opposite?”

You’re gripping the proposal he just asked you to amend. You’re enraged and feeling wronged, eyes brimming with tears.

Victor sighs. Getting up from his desk, he sits on the sofa at the side.

"Come here...”

You scoot over, akin to a petulant child.

"Come and sit on my lap."

Placing the proposal on the coffee table, you follow his instructions.

He embraces you.

“I was too impatient... I just wanted you to be a little more independent. You’re already doing very well, but I can guarantee that you can do even better. This way, you won’t struggle when faced with competition in the business world... I was afraid that if you relied on me too much, and if I was gone someday, what would happen to you? I can leave you the company and assets, but that’s not what I want.”

“If you have to leave me one day, I hope you’d be independent enough and wouldn’t need me to help you with trivial things. If you don’t know anything and an accident happens someday, I’ll never be at peace...”

"We’ll do things slowly, okay? I’ll teach you little by little...”

[ GAVIN ]

"Ahh I’m so tired! I don't want to practice anymore!"

You lean against the wall, letting yourself slide down.

“This will be the last time. Try to break free from me. It’d really be the last time.”

Gavin pulls you up, locking you in place from behind.

You’re extremely tired. After squirming slightly, you decide not to move anymore, letting yourself remain locked in his arms.

“Wrong. Your elbow should be here... you could have also stepped on my foot, but you didn’t.”

You signal to Gavin to release you, then slump onto the ground. Gavin follow suit, sitting down on the floor.

“Gavin, is this a new fitness method? You seem so fond of it... Isn’t running enough...”

“I’m teaching you self-defence for women.”

“Why? Having you around is enough! You can sense when I’m in danger, can’t you?”

Gavin tousles your hair.

"Yes... but what if I’m gone someday...? What would happen if I can’t protect you like I said I would?”

“I’d definitely keep you safe. But if you were to leave me one day, and encounter a gangster or robber in the street, what would happen? I want to ensure your safety, and also ensure that you can take care of your own safety.”

“You’re my most beloved person... I don’t want to see you get hurt in any way...”

[ LUCIEN ]

"Lucien! I can't reach for that book!”

"Why not try standing on a stool?"

"Lucien, how do I turn the water heater on...”

"Twist here... I’ll only teach you once."

"Lucien! I can’t tell if the omelette is ready. What should I do?”

"Turn the flames down, turn it over and fry..."

You begin to realise that Lucien isn’t willing to do certain things for you.

Even though he’s easily able to get the book down for you, prepare the bathwater for you, and make the best omelettes, you just can’t understand why he’s been sitting on the sidelines recently. In the past, he’d do these things for you in a heartbeat.

Which is why Lucien sees this current sight before him: You nestled in his arms, tears wetting the fabric of his pyjamas.

“Lucien... are you getting impatient with me... and finding me a bother...”

“Why would I? What made you think that?”

Feeling wronged, you splutter a response, telling him about how you’ve been feeling.

Lucien chuckles, then replies solemnly.

“I will never find you a bother... I’m very happy when you ask me for help.”

“It’s just that... if I had to leave you one day, who would you ask for help? When a book is at a high place, would you just give up and cry?”

"Do you think I can rest assured when the Silly Girl just learnt how to use the water heater and how to fry omelettes today?”

“If you really want to continue ‘bothering me’, of course I’m fine with it. But... I think you should understand in advance, or at least get used to a possibility that I might lose my life in the future...”

"When that time comes, you must be even more independent than you are now, so that I can be reassured. Is that okay, Silly Girl?”

[ KIRO ]

“Kiro! I’m so upset! I’m so sad that I’m about to cry!” You walk in through the entranceway, toss your shoes into the rack, and collapse on the sofa.

"Sorry, Miss Chips. I know you’re upset, but I have work to do. Could you talk to Anna instead? She could accompany you to shop for good food?” Kiro freezes for a moment. Without even turning his head, he continues with what he’s busy with.

It’s happening again.

Recently, whenever you share your feelings with Kiro, he’d choose to avoid it. You can’t help but think, does he dislike me? Or am I really clingy... Kiro already has to deal with so much stress, but still has to coax me every day....

After mulling over it, you decide to apologise.

"Sorry Kiro... I must be really clingy... Even though you’re a cheerful person, you’d definitely get annoyed by my negative moods... I’m sorry...”

“Miss Chips!”

Kiro finally stops what he’s doing, taking large strides towards you. Then, he takes you into his arms with a tight hug.

"That’s not it, Miss Chips... I’m not bothered by you at all. I’m very happy that you tell me these things, but...”

"If I were to disappear abruptly one day, who would you tell these things to? Will anyone accompany you shopping like me? Will someone accompany you to eat delicious food like me?”

“Each time you’re unhappy, you’ll only share it with me, and you rely on me. I’m really happy... but you have to learn how to rely on Anna too. She’s a very dependable adult, and I believe that she can take care of you if I have to leave someday.

"No matter when it is, I really like it when Miss Chips smiles..."

[ SHAW ]

“Miss, can I buy you a drink? "The strange man across the bar is holding two glasses of cocktails, offering one to you.

"No, I still..."

"Just one glass? You won’t get drunk. I just want to find someone to chat with."

"No, I... I..."

You keep refusing, but the man opposite remains enthusiastic.

"Hey, MC, what are you doing here? Let's go."

A familiar voice drifts to your ears, and two long legs in ripped jeans stride over.

"Shaw!" You stand up in surprise, lunging into his arms. Shaw was sensible this time and didn't wear clothes with rivets on them.

"And you. Don't ask someone else's girlfriend to drink. Let's go."

After that, he pulls you out of the dark and small bar.

"MC, what were you doing there?”

"Hehe, there’s some downtime at work, so I had to celebrate with a drink! I’ll also have a drink with you after your graduation thesis gets approved!"

"..."

"Next time, don’t come to such places. If you want to drink, drink at home. If you get drunk here, no one will care about you."

"No! I'll call you if I drink too much! You’ll come to pick me up immediately, won't you!"

Shaw releases your hand, and the street lamp casts an elongated shadows.

"Then what if I’m gone one day? What if I can’t rush to you in time? What would you do if you’re bullied by others? Are you stupid?"

It's the first time you see Shaw looking at you so seriously. Although the light is against his back and you can't see his facial features, you can vaguely see that his expression reveals an aura of worry.

“If I were to leave someday, who do you think would send you home? Who will help you reject the cocktail? Kiki?"

"Shaw... I...”

“Next time, drink at home. It’d be a little safer at home. Don't drink too much. It's best to bring a female friend with you.”

"Don't let me worry about you all the time, okay..."

–

More translated and original works: here

–

[ Permission to translate ]

池离子: OK! Just state that the source is LOFTER池离子. Also, if you’ve posted it, could you also take a screenshot for me? No need for the whole thing - just a little will do!

#mlqc #cheri shortcake

92 notes · View notes

neoheros · 4 years

Text

how would haikyuu boys handle getting shipped with a friend on tiktok? feat. kuroo tetsuro

kuroo tetsuro has a crippling tiktok addiction and he’s in denial about it but everyone around him knows because all he does in his free time is get on that app

that’s canon i’m not arguing with anyone about this

he’s the kind of guy to fall asleep from scrolling through his fyp and the moment he wakes up he looks for his phone under his pillow to watch more lmaooo

so anyways

you share classes with him and he’s not really the kind of guy to have crushes especially on people he’s not close with

but then one day he’s on his fyp and he stumbles on one of your videos

and he’s just like ?? woah

he recognizes you obvi, he’s not one to talk to people out of his friend group but he’s not completely ignorant to everyone else

he immediately sees that you have indeed quite the following and have almost majority of your posts going viral

so yea you can say he’d notice you more in class now

at first it was subtle, looking at you more when he’s spacing out or paying close attention to you when you’re reciting

he doesn’t even notice how he includes you more in his thought process until the day kenma pointed it out to him how he’s been a bit more distracted lately

he brushed it off thinking it wasn’t really anything serious

but then boy Oh boy !!!

he started noticing the fact that you’ve got a really nice room in your vids and your fave led lights are the red ones since you almost always use them

he’s also really into the fact that you upload more on comedic videos than dancing ones

but HONEY when you posted your take on the dance trend of savage by megan thee stallion ,,, he was GONEEEE !!!

he sent that video to kenma like five times in a row with the caption “aha brb gonna LIVE for this woman 😗✌️”

kenma be like: simp city population - u

at this point he just accepts it, like flat out he took it within himself to UNDERSTAND how much he’s crushing on you and kenma asks him if he’s gonna do anything about it and he’s like ????

like he gets how awesome he is and stuff cause duh captain of the volleyball team and most probably the most beautiful man on campus but you’re also really good in class and very attractive

not to mention that you’ve never even looked his way before

he was hurt, man !!

only he could feel as rejected as someone who actually did get rejected

nevertheless, he got over that and just woke up one day telling himself that he was gonna shoot his shot anyway !!

so one day in class, right after the lunch bell rang, he took a deep breath and rummaged his insides for every drip of confidence he could muster

he walked to your seat and you were kinda surprised because this boy right here has never once talked to you before

his opening line was “can i sit here?”

you were still really confused but then he said something about wanting to be friends and your heart was just really warm cause !!!! that’s so NICE !!

and he mentioned how he knew you from tiktok since you practically lived on his fyp

you were really embarrassed and he got to see in action how your ears turn really red when you get shy

kuroo, internally: “that’s so FUCKEN CUTE !!!!!”

he had to reassure you that it was indeed really cool that you made bomb ass tiktoks

you were so grateful cause like one minute you were having a terrible day because of your stupid teacher then bam this 6’2 beauty of a man came swooping in telling you you were terrific

you two became friends after that and it made you really happy to have someone as cool as kuroo as your best friend

kuroo likes to sit with you at lunch except when you’re with other people then he gets a bit dejected so he’s just “well damn maybe tomorrow then”

it’s all good though cause he has invited you to numerous of his practices and that’s when you SEE how amazing this man is at volleyball

one day you’re like “hey wanna do a tiktok with me?”

and he’s like “the one where you kiss me?”

you, flushed: DIPSHIT WHY WOULD YOU SAY THAT !!!!1!1!1!!

you guys do the one where you dance to supalonely by benee

it went OFF !!! 700k likes and a solid ass 2.7M views because apparently the viewers really like it when kuroo dances next to you in his varsity uniform and has sweat dripping on his forehead

your comments for the next two weeks are just like “bro post another one with kuroo please PLEASE”

kuroo: guess people just like me more :)

you: leave my mentions <3

sometimes you’d get people replying to your videos with “you and kuroo look really good together”

you see them but you most likely ignore it because even if you did know how much you liked kuroo, you didn’t wanna jeopardize the friendship, yk?

anyhow due to popular demand, you include him in your videos again and every time you do they always go viral !!!

it’s very cute especially when you do the ones where you snapchat him song lyrics and he answers even if he does know it’s a trend

“can they please just get together already, we all know they’re pining but they’re too coward to say it !!”

you: ok u know what user9728182829 since u’r so good at this why don’t u be the one to make tiktoks at a volleyball court and dodge all those stray balls 😤

you were so fed up with it that you actually tell kuroo about the entirety of tiktok shipping the two of you together

he was worried that you were upset because people liked you and him dating that he thought maybe you just weren’t into him

BUT THEN !!!

because of the corona virus all the schools shut down and people were forced to stay in their houses for quarantine

it was sad that everything got cancelled and you weren’t allowed to see your friends anymore

but that’s ok cause kuroo insisted to facetime everyday

you: why can’t we just text

kuroo: because what if you forget what i look like 🥺

you: hey i’m not that blessed ❤️

it was like the quarantine never happened since you still saw and talked to him everyday

sometimes he’d show up at your place but refuse to come inside cause social distancing

this mfer threw rocks on your glass window just to get your attention once

kuroo: i got you those edible cookie dough in pints !!

you: omfg 🥺👉👈

then he chucks it at you because he ain’t boutta break the law to get you food 😤

it’s ok though you have really good reflexes and it only hit your elbow the first 2 times !!

you got it all on camera and posted it on tiktok and everyone in the comments were LIVID at the fact that you captioned it with “best friends b like”

“i just know that kuroo is punching the air right now.”

“imagine risking the corona and still being friend zoned.”

“when you realize kuroo is actually the president of simp city.”

other times he’d snap you at 3 in the morning asking if you want anything from starbucks

no one:

your snapchat dms at 3:28 am: you really went to bed you SN A KE !!

and when you wake up the next morning you find out that this guy is still awake and that he’s been chilling in the starbucks parking lot all morning !!!

that’s ok though because other than the fact that his sleep schedule is completely wrecked he still got you your venti strawberry acai refresher

you: thank you sm 🥺 what do i owe you

kuroo: a kiss on the cheek

you: you can have the drink back ❤️

that’s when the new tiktok trend started and people were posting the hottest guys on campus or revealing their crushes since 1st grade

you, feeling brave because school is cancelled: aight bet 😎

you do a tiktok hopping on the trend and you captioned it with “now that we aren’t coming back to school here are the boys from campus that i’d date for real”

you stall for the first 30 second by vibing to the music and when the beat drop !!

you showed a picture of kuroo and you put in the text “kinda missing him too”

you were extremely regretting this but numerous people already saw it and the comments went on and on about how unsurprising this was

press f ma’am

so one afternoon while kuroo was scrolling through his tiktok, he was surprised by the amount of notifications he was getting

cause he doesn’t even post videos ??

he’s only there to watch funny stuff and leave insulting comments on your posts cause he’s a good friend

he checks and they’re all just tags of him in this one video and he was kinda worried cause what if it was a hate post ??

but then he saw that it was yours and he’s less nervous !!!

kuroo, texting you: if you diss me in this one i’m posting the screenshot of you falling asleep on facetime

so he watches it and ??????????????

bro he went 🥺

before he messages you he went straight for the comments and !!!!!

“who knew it was kuroo before watching the whole video?”

“don’t be shy put some more photos of him !!”

“if kuroo duets this i’m gonna make sure to never fall in love unless its like this.”

“y’all he did it boys!! he graduated from the best friend zone!!”

he’s still really surprised by this and he really hopes you’re not kidding cause bro you??? like him????

thanks to that comment he saw, he decides to duet your video by using the same sound and doing the same dance with the same caption “now that we aren’t coming back to school here are the ones from campus that i’d date for real”

and they’re all just pictures of you 🥺

it blows up but before you see it on your fyp he’s already asking to facetime and when you answer you swear he’s just got the biggest smile in the world i’m :(

kuroo: lol remember when you publicly told majority of the internet how much you liked me

you: lol remember when you weren’t talking ❤️

2K notes · View notes

reverielix · 3 years

Note

Excuse me Sir, Sorry to bother you. But frankly I'm new to this astrology topic but it's very fascinating to say the least.

Friend asked me to do a natal chart? No clue. Have no clue. Saw the previous post, was wondering if you help a stranger out here ? Lol.

Hi haha!

I’m a Miss but OFC I CAN TELL YOU MORE ABOUT IT! (Can you tell I’m excited? Lol) I’ll be seizing this opportunity to make an...

Astrology basics masterpost

Okay first off, the natal chart is a “snap shot” of the sky when you were born with the earth in the middle. There are 4 compounds that birth charts are made of:

1. The signs

You’ve definitely already heard of zodiac signs. In astrology, the sky is divided into 12 equal parts, each reserved for a sign starting at Aries and ending at Pisces. It goes like this: Aries ♈️, Taurus ♉️, Gemini ♊️, Cancer ♋️, Leo ♌️, Virgo ♍️, Libra ♎️, Scorpio ♏️, Sagittarius ♐️, Capricorn ♑️, Aquarius ♒️, Pisces ♓️

Basically, each sign is associated with certain character traits (which range many more than I or any singular source could encompass in short, I left a few links for gathering information in the end of this post). But it always depends on how evolved the person is. Aquarians CAN be detached if not evolved, but also have many more qualities such as their modality and element (which imply traits such as their innovative nature, intellect, hunger for knowledge, empathy, sociability,...)

So basically there are 4 elements (fire, earth, air and water) in astrology and 3 modalities (cardinal, fixed, mutable) which all carry certain meanings to them. Those elements and modalities are evenly distributed within the zodiac and move along the signs in the order I wrote them up above. So we start with cardinal fire (Aries), then we follow up with fixed earth (Taurus), after that we’ve got mutable air (Gemini), then again a cardinal sign but this time belonging to the water signs (Cancer), and so on. Additionally, all earth and water signs are of negative polarity while fire and air are of positive polarity.

The signs are the outermost circle you see when looking at your birth/natal chart. (On the left, where the arrow points, for instance, was Virgo ♍️ when & where you were born) They represent the way that you express a certain core part (3rd point) of yourself.

2. The houses

The numbers you see around the innermost circle with the lines in it are the houses. Each house is ruled by a sign in modern astrology: Aries is the first sign, so it rules the first house,...). This means that each house is afflicted with one sign and its qualities and traits.

Each house represents an area of life: The 4th house—ruled by Cancer—represents the home, comfort zone, where we crave for stability and emotional support as well as a lot more.

The angular houses ruled by cardinal signs, so: the 1st house (ascendant/rising), the 4th house (ic/ Imum Coeli), the 7th house (descendant), the 10th house (mc/midheaven) show in the picture you sent me with arrows and have a special significance in the chart + also have aspects (4th point) to them shown.

The first 6 houses are afflicted most with yourself and the last 6 houses have to do with your social/public self (e.g.: 2nd house has to do with resources and the 8th with shares resources). This can also be applied to each sign ruling the house.

3. The celestial bodies

When somebody asks what your zodiac sign is, you would answer with Capricorn, when in actuality, it’s just your sun sign (so one of many zodiac signs in your chart).

Each celestial body represents a core part of the human psyche/personality and also rules a/two sign(s) and with that a/two house(s). Another terminology for rulership can be domicile (e.g.: Saturn is in domicile in Capricorn).

Every planet is afflicted with the signs (and houses) in the form of essential dignity (whether in terms of exaltation/fall or detriment/domicile)

The sun rules Leo and the 5th house. These connections are made as to better understand each house/sign/planet and clarify/stress the connections between these three “compounds”. So, ruling Leo and the 5th house, the sun represents how we express ourselves and how we perform along with our egos, overall sense of identity and self-awareness among other things.

Before you say that you (know people who) don’t relate to their zodiac sign or don’t seem to present yourself/themselves like that at all: a placement (celestial body in a sign in a house) always depends on the aspects and also the house that nobody talks about. You’re not only a Capricorn, but a Capricorn sun in the 4th house conjunct Mercury,... (+ other aspects). Your sun in the 12th/7th/8th houses (houses, among others, afflicted with the subconscious) can mean that your way to express yourself is more in the background or not quite figured out yet. (With Leo in the 12th house that may also apply to you:) In the case of the 12th house, you may want to express yourself, but don’t exactly know how to...

Also, all of your chart matters! The sun sign is only a part of it, though one of the 3 most important placements (sun, moon, rising).

For the following paragraph keep in mind: personal/inner celestial bodies/planets (houses and signs matter equally), generational/outer planets/placements (houses matter most because they move slowly along the zodiac. the slower they move, the less the sign matters.)

The celestial bodies used in astrology aren’t limited to a certain amount as asteroids can also be interpreted/also have meanings but the most commonly used and talked about are: the sun, the moon, Mercury, Venus, Mars (Nodes, Vertex — aren’t celestial bodies but fall into the “sign & house are important” category and are a tool that function/are illustrated like celestial bodies), Jupiter, Saturn, Uranus, Neptune, Pluto (Chiron, black moon Lilith)

You can see each celestial body’s name listed with its symbol in the bottom right corner of the screenshot you sent me and can then look at the circle between the signs and house numbers for where they are placed.

Lastly, planets are afflicted with each other as well since generational planets can be higher octaves of personal planets, and “get along” or don’t “get along” just like the signs, whose compatibility is determined by...

4. The aspects

The expression of every planet depends on these! Aspects show the relationship between two placements and how they connect into one whole personality (Additional information about humans in general: our personality integrates at around the ages of 7 to 9. Before that, we have different needs and wants but not one integrated personality that is made of interwoven traits, qualities,...). They point out how many degrees two or more placements are away from each other (e.g. 180deg = opposition). So when you look at your own chart, you can see that Virgo ♍️ and Pisces ♓️ are in opposition to each other. This also means that people born during Pisces season and people born during Virgo season celebrate their birthdays approximately 6 months apart from each other (because the sun needs a year to transit through the signs).

There are major and minor aspects. Major aspects are usually displayed in the innermost space of the circle using different colored lines and are an umbrella term for: the opposition, the square, the conjunction, the trine and the sextile. Minor aspects are usually listed in extended chart selection options (semi-sextiles, quincunxes, quintiles,...)

Those are then divided into hard/challenging (square, opposition,...), neutral (conjunction,...) and soft/harmonious (trine, sextile,...) aspects. Example: your Sagittarius Mercury (communication, (early) education, rationality, speech, day-to-day expression, perfectionism/detail-orientation,...) in the 4th in a trine (same element, a “flow of energy”) with your Aries moon (emotions, empathy, feelings of security, nurture, comfort,...) in the 8th can indicate potential for the verbal expression of your emotions. You may let your emotions out by talking to people who you live with or your immediate family. Moreover, you could have a desire to write about your emotions in a philosophical/educational way to make others think, but decide to keep your writing to yourself or your closest circle nonetheless. One could chat about an aspect for sooo long just because there are so many things associated with the houses, signs, aspects and celestial bodies. There are so many different angles to take and you’re never done learning about astrology.

Whenever you ask somebody what sign is most compatible with yours, you’d look at the aspects between your sign and other signs to determine if your placements are in a harmonious relationship with each other, though synastry (astrology of compatibility between two birth chart) is much more complex then that.

Lastly, aspects don’t go specifically with one sign/house/celestial body, and some placements can also be unaspected. There are also things such as retrogrades, chart shapes, aspect patterns, dominant signs, persona charts, interceptions and much more but that would definitely go beyond the scope. Let me know if you’d like for me to make a post going in depth regarding those things.

How astrology on social media and day-to-day life has been altered to be regarded as something it is not:

The key is to view modern astrology less as a predictive tool or proof for assumption—because frankly it isn’t—but more as a tool to recognize psychological patterns and behavioral tendencies, which ultimately are what astrology illustrates through elements in the sky. So, no, actions cannot be justified because somebody has a certain placement. (As I mentioned above, it is crucial to regard that placements can be evolved or not evolved and therefore can “manifest” (not the candles in a circle for clear skin and money kind lol) differently). Lastly, astrology doesn’t tell you what to do and you alone have the power over your behavior. You can break free from the patterns illustrated and tendencies pointed out. It’s all about who you choose to be.

Please mark that the links for planets, signs and houses don’t encompass everything that the planets/houses/signs illustrate. For more information I recommend Hannah’s Elsewhere, astro-charts, astro.com, cafe.astrology or astrology.com (lmk if you know about more sources).

55 notes · View notes

farfromsugafanfic · 3 years

Text

Sutures - Chapter Eleven: Right Place

Genre: Soulmates AU, Idiots to Lovers, slight Enemies to Lovers

Pairing: Yoongi/Named Reader

Warnings (chapter specific): mentions of anxiety (sort of), exes who won’t leave you alone, family hospitalization, mentions of death

Synopsis: “A person often meets his destiny on the road he took to avoid it.” –Jean de la Fontaine

There was only one thing you and Min Yoongi had in common that night. You were both brokenhearted. You only intended to be together for one night, but when you both end up in the hospital the next day you discover that you are soulmates. It could kill you to be apart. As you and Yoongi attempt to sever the bond between you, will another be formed?

Previous | Series Masterlist | Next

You swung your legs towards the seat across from you, but they were just barely too short and they fell straight back down which caused Yoongi to chuckle. He sat diagonally from you with his feet resting on the seat beside you. He wore headphones and had his laptop in front of him. You hadn't even realized he was paying attention to you.

You held your knitting needles and your creation was nearly done. Yoongi had told you about his family dog--Holly--and you remembered seeing his picture in Yoongi's studio. You were knitting a small scarf that would tuck easily around his collar. You wished you had more time to make him something like a jacket, but Yoongi had sprung the trip on you, planning and taking on a large project like that took weeks to complete.

The scenery on the train flew by so quickly you could hardly make it out and it made your head spin if you tried for more than a few seconds.

"You seem quiet," Yoongi said. He hadn't taken his headphones off and you laughed at the thought that he simply had them in as a habit.

"You were working. I didn't want to disturb you."

Yoongi shrugged and lowered his laptop screen and allowed his headphones to fall around his neck. "You seem nervous." His gaze lowered down to your fingers that continued knitting as you spoke and looked into his eyes. You hadn't even noticed the way your fingers continued the pattern.

"I mean, I want to make a good impression on your family. I know we're not really together or anything, but I'm your soulmate and if they don't like me--"

"Exactly, you're my soulmate," Yoongi said. "Finding each other was less than one in a million. Almost less than one in a billion. And, don't they say that soulmates are often not just compatible with the person, but their family as well?"

"That's been the case so far," you said, remembering reading the Wikipedia article on the handful of other soulmate couples. "But, soulmate science is new and imprecise. And, I imagine for those who are different from their families or don't have good relationships with them, that can't always be true."

"I have a feeling they will like you," Yoongi said. "You don't have to worry."

You didn't get a chance to respond as the train lurched to a stop and announced its arrival in Daegu. The doors opened and you stood up. You and Yoongi had had the train car to yourselves, so you were able to stand up and grab your suitcase immediately.

"Are the press gonna be here?"

"I don't know," Yoongi said. "We didn't officially announce this trip, but I wouldn't be surprised if someone is following us."

You nodded. It was becoming familiar to see camera flashes and your face used as a cover photo. The thought of growing used to it sent a shiver down your spine as you extended the handle on your suitcase.

Yoongi stood beside you and your eyes met briefly causing his lips to turn upwards in a small smile. He reached up and pulled the mask you'd forgotten was looped around your ears and hanging around your chin up over your lips and nose.

"Just in case," he said.

---

You hadn't seen a single camera as you neared Yoongi's parent's place. You weren't sure if it was a blessing or a curse. Just because you couldn't see the cameras, didn't mean that they weren't there. You half expected to see a picture of you and Yoongi getting off the train in Daegu pop up in your newsfeed.

"We're here," Yoongi said. The car stopped and Yoongi was immediately out and walking around to open your door. You stepped out and gripped the handle of your suitcase, the bones of your knuckles feeling like they were about to burst through your skin.

Yoongi walked slightly in front of you and opened the door. The first thing you heard was a high-pitched barking and before you could catch sight of Holly, the brown full-sized poodle was jumping up on you in greeting.

"You must Holly," you said, crouching down and allowing the dog to rest its front half on your lap. "I've heard a lot about you."

"Ah, I'm right here." Yoongi's face contorted into a look of simultaneous amusement and jealousy.

You laughed as you ruffled the dog's ears and crouched down so he could lick your chin. "Oh, you're so sweet." You reached into your purse and pulled out the scarf you finished on the train ride and carefully tied it around his neck.

"Oh!" you heard someone exclaim from the other end of the room. "I wasn't expecting you two for another hour. Dinner isn't done yet."

"It's fine. We have to get settled anyway."

Yoongi's mother's eyes widened as she met yours. It was as if she had just noticed you. She stood just a few inches shorter than Yoongi and you could see they shared many features. From the slope of the nose to the way her eyes seemed to narrow in on you, the same way Yoongi's did in certain moments.

"You must be Sumi," she said. "It's so nice to finally meet you."

She reached out and pulled you into a hug. You tensed as she wrapped her arms around you. From everything Yoongi told you about his family, they were not outwardly affectionate people and so you had expected at most a firm handshake.

"I'm sorry," she said. "I just feel like you're part of the family already." She glanced over at Yoongi and back at you. "I haven't seen Yoongi this happy for a long time."

"Oh," was all you could get out. Yoongi had told them you were trying to sever the relationship, right?

---

Yoongi met his mother's gaze. Her eyebrow slightly arched, a look Yoongi had seen many times. Holly broke the silence with a bark signaling for you to reach down and pet him again. You crouched down so your face was level with his and allowed him to lick your chin.

Yoongi couldn't help but smile as he watched you. Your hair was ruffled from the train ride and he noticed the way your shaking hands calmed as they ran through Holly's fur. He crouched down next to you and met your eyes, a small smile simultaneously appeared on both your faces.

"I've never seen him warm up to someone so quickly," Yoongi said, ruffling the dog's ears.

"I guess he just likes me."

"Yeah," Yoongi said, his voice an octave quieter. "I guess he does."

Yoongi's phone buzzes in his pocket. His hand reaches for it, but he doesn't want to leave this moment. It wasn't like he was reliant on his phone, but with an upcoming album and the other members working on it in his absence, he couldn't ignore it.

Jihee's name appeared on his screen and his widened. He hadn't blocked her number purely because the texts after the break up stopped and with the whole soulmates thing, he'd honestly forgotten.

Yoongi opened the text and found a screenshot from Instagram where she'd posted a picture of herself laying on a bed with her legs straight up in the air. It wasn't the familiar slope of her calves or the arch of her back that caught his eye, but rather the black pumps she wore.

He recognized them instantly as the ones you'd worn and abandoned the night he'd met you and the ones you'd failed to get back from Minki. Yoongi had no idea how Jihee got a hold of them, or how she even knew their significance.

He screenshot the text and emailed it off to the legal team at BigHit. He knew the post would probably gain some attention, but he trusted it would be seen for what it was, an attempt to seek attention.

Blocking her number, he slid the phone back into his pocket. Yoongi knew he should tell you, but watching the way you adjusted the scarf around Holly's neck, he decided he'd tell you later.

---

Yoongi was starving and watched as each dish was placed on the table. His parents had made a bit of everything and as soon as everything was set he quickly reached for braised pork and his mom's homemade kimchi.

You grabbed a bit of everything and mixed it together with your rice. Yoongi reached out and grabbed a few more pieces of meat and set them in your bowl.

"You didn't eat much this morning."

Your eyes widened and Yoongi thought he caught your lips curl into an embarrassed smile.

"Sumi," Yoongi's mother said. "I'm so happy you came into Yoongi's life. We were getting a bit worried Yoongi would never find someone who made him truly happy." She glanced over at Yoongi's father. "Even in his past relationships, I never saw Yoongi like this."

Yoongi felt the heat rush to his ears and his feet fidgeted under the table.

You--despite Yoongi seeing the way you fiddled with your chopsticks indicating your nerves--smiled. "Well, I didn't really have a choice." You laugh, which normally made Yoongi's heart jump, this time made it fall.

While it was entirely true that you and Yoongi hadn't a choice in getting to know each other, there was a part of Yoongi that didn't want this to end. He wanted to see you play with Holly, see your hair splayed over your face in the morning, and your small smile when he gave you more meat.

"I am happy I met Yoongi though," you said. "Even if we can't spend the rest of our lives together and this is all some weird biological thing, these past few weeks getting to know Yoongi have convinced me that we are truly soulmates. I don't think soulmates always have to be romantic or end up together, we just get each other."

The table fell silent. But, it was content and for the remainder of the meal, the only sounds heard were light conversations and the sounds of eating. Yoongi couldn't help the swelling feeling he felt in his chest. He worried he would suddenly float off the seat like a balloon if he didn't try to stifle it.

You set down your chopsticks. "Thank you for the meal. I'll clean up my things and head to bed."

"Oh, no need to clean up. You're our guest. Yoongi, why don't you show her to your old room? I'll set you up a bed on the couch."

"Ah, mom, we're soulmates. Is that really necessary?"

"Yes," his mom said. "Maybe the poor girl wants a break from you."

His mom's quip made you laugh and he let out a sigh. "All right," he said. "Come on."

---

Yoongi led you to his childhood bedroom. When he opened the door, you were met with Epik High posters and notebooks lining the shelves of his bookshelf. You smiled at how distinctly Yoongi it felt. While it obvious his room hadn't changed much from when he first left home, you could still see hints of the man Yoongi would become. From the basketball trophies to the books about music production.

"Hey, I need to talk to you about something."

Yoongi's demeanor changed as he closed the door. "I got a text from Jihee earlier. She somehow got ahold of your shoes and posted with them. I sent everything to the company and I'm sure they will take care of it. I just wanted to warn you in case this blows up--"

"I trust you, Yoongi," you interrupted. "They've already said everything they could. It can't get worse than it already is and I know you'll do your best to take care of it."

You flopped down onto the bed and patted the bed beside you. Yoongi laid beside you. Your bodies were centimeters apart, but you didn't touch.

"Your parents didn't like Jihee, did they?"

Yoongi shook his head. "No," he said. "They tolerated her because I liked her, but they said they never pictured her as part of the family."

"Mine never liked Minki either." You were silent for a moment. "Maybe they knew somehow."

"Maybe," Yoongi said, his fingers brushing against yours. You turned and noticed he was still looking up at the ceiling, seemingly not noticing how his hand wandered to find yours. You wondered if it was a side effect of being soulmates. Your hands would always find each other.

The moment was severed when your phone rang. It was your mom and your stomach turned as you realized it was 5 am there.

"Hello?" You didn't care that Yoongi was in the room anymore. In fact, something kept you clinging to his hand.

"Sumi? You need to get here. Grandma's in the hospital and they don't think she has much time left. We're gonna leave her on life support until you get here because we know she would want you here. I don't know if it's possible without risking your own health and Grandma will understand--"

"No, I'm coming. I'll find a way. Give me a couple days. I'll be there, okay?" Your eyes were filled to the brim with tears and after you said your goodbyes, they rushed out. You weren't cognizant, but when you opened your eyes, you were folded into Yoongi's chest.

"Did you hear everything?"

Yoongi nodded. "I've already called a car to take us back. We'll be back in Seoul in a few hours."

"Yoongi, what are we going to do? You have a comeback soon. You can't just come with me to California."

"Shh, we'll figure it out. Just get your things together, okay?"

You nodded and got off the bed to collect your things. "Yoongi," your voice was still hoarse and barely there. "Thank you."

48 notes · View notes

jamaiskookie · 3 years

Note

can i request a soft fluffy little drabble of fanboy yoongi and idol reader?

soundcloud rapper meets professional idol- myg

it’s #starrieselcaday !! where everyone posts their selfie in the hopes of their bias replying to them! alternatively, yoongi is a shy fanboy and you’re an idol with an undercover account where you stalk your fans.

masterlist

listen

min yoongi is not a liar

HOWEVER, if you happen to ask him what kind of music he likes to listen to..... that’s a rare exception.

he’ll probably reply by rattling off some of his favourite hip-hop rappers etc etc (emInEM!!! KANYE!! THE CLASSICS!!!!! beyonce)

which,, is not entirely a lie, okay?? he DOES listen to those artists! but his greatest guilty pleasure is this ... idolgirlgroup UGH he feels lame just thinking about it.

not that it’s a pathetic thing, ya know? it’s just that he’s ~min yoongi~ jin literally told him once that he would be re-born as a rock and he AGREES WITH THAT.

it’s not like he’s ashamed of saying he’s a fan of your group, it’s just that it’s not expected of the stone-cold soundcloud-rapper yoongi.

but secretly, he winds down by watching your fancams, mass streaming your albums, screaming about your debut anniversary, the list goes on... the day in a stans life never ENDS GOD.

he literally screamed at his laptop and bursted into tears for a good 4 hours your last comeback.

he even got jimin and namjoon to end up liking his ult group!!!

seokjin refuses to ‘lower himself’ to their standards but everyone knows he secretly has all of your albums downloaded

the group (lomls) called dreamcloud consists of five members- yoona, jisoo, lia, chae, and y/n. the fandom name is called starrie, even though nobody knows how that came about??

(his favourite single is their newest song called cloud 9)

three guesses to who’s his bias gO!!

if you guessed y/n congrats you’re CORRECT. other stans say that the bias they started with is NEVER the bias they have no but you’ve been yoongle’s ult bias since debut and it’ll forever be that way!!!

he’s been bias wrecked approx. 30 times but we don’t talk about that.

like lia is THIS close to stealing the bias spot but you’ll always have such a special place in his heart :,-)

which is why when he sees the hashtag #starrieselcaday which was trended by you when you tweeted out a selca he POUNCES ON THE CHANCE TO POST A SELCA

on his secret fan account of course.

oh boy he really hopes nobody from uni is going to see this..,,, he’ll deal with it if the time comes.

he definitely spends 30 minutes with jimin trying to figure out where the best lighting in the dorm is and then an additional 30 minutes just taking the damn picture.

he ends up taking the photo in his black bucket hat (the e-boy one) with this slightly awkward half smile plastered on his face.

he kinda hates it but it was also the best shot out of the 2000 he just took so that one it is!! (he’s also pretty tired of jimin telling him to ‘pOSE’)

he just posts it on his twitter with nothing but the #starrieselcaday hashtag. it’s the first time he’s participated in these so he’s kinda ~nervous~ but whaddya know!!

other starries are already hyping him up in his mentions!! [proud tears] gosh he loves this fandom so freaking much. he links jimin’s selca below his, telling his followers to go hype jimin’s picture too.

it’s slightly concerning how big of a following yoongi has on his stan account.

#STARRIESELCADAY! ✨@/liabby

replying to @/ynssuga

you look so cute suga!!!! ur bucket hat omg where did you get it send LINKS!!!

dreamcloud D-14!!! ��@/starriejoonn

replying to @/ynssuga

so THIS is what you spent an hour doing with jimin. owo looking good my friend! 😎

jade 💜ot5 @/vitaminchae

replying to @/ynssuga

omg you did #starrieselcaday !!! congrats on 50k by the way!! we’re all anticipating your album review (keysmashes) <3

awhhhh

how cute!

see? best fandom.

honestly he wasn’t even aware that he hit 50 thousand on his stan account what the FRICK that’s insane!!

the only thing he does on this stupid account is give album reviews (which are quite useless at this point it’s always a 10/10) and scream about the comeback stages.

occasionally he’ll go on to remind his fellow starries to drink water and take breaks from streaming- because contrary to popular belief he can be soft.

☁️STREAM #CLOUD9 ☁️@/yoonsoohearteu

replying to @/ynssuga

hOOOOOOOTTTT!! woohoo!! why didn’t you tell us you were attractive irl?? 👀 ru single bby? 👉👈

yoongi snorts reading that comment, replying to tell @/yoonsoohearteu that he’s far from attractive and is unfortunately, single. it’s all y/n’s fault, he jokes in his reply. dreamcloud has raised his standards too much.

y/n ✅@/dreamcloudy/n_official

replying to @/ynssuga

💞💞💞

[blink]

[bliiiink]

[?????????]

wut.

are his eyes deceiving him? WHAT?

yoongi checks again, and sure enough, the little checkmark verifying your OFFICIAL twitter account lays next to your handle,.,, WHICH IS BELOW HIS POST.

he takes a deep breath, trying to recall whatever breathing exercise his therapist taught him just last week.

it doesn’t work.

“AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH- “

💤☁️.

“y/n!“ yoona calls from the kitchen. in your large XL hoodie, you step in, humming a ‘hmm?’ to your leader. all the other girls are camped out in their rooms, preparing for the comeback coming soon.

yoona’s scrolling on her phone with a confused look on her face.

“why is hashtag starrie-selca-day trending? did you tweet something or was it chae?“ she asks, and you hide a slight smile.

“oh yeah,“ you reply. “i tweeted my selca this morning. you guys can tweet out yours too.“

yoona raises her eyebrow. “okay,” she asks. “just be careful.” you blink.

“be careful... of?“

“make sure the agency doesn’t find out about your secret account you use to stalk the starries.“ you sputter, spitting out a random excuse.

“you’re too obvious these days, y/n,“ yoona says, not unkindly. “i figured that your comment wasn’t intentional... was it on that guy suga’s page? anyways, your official account didn’t reply to any other fan’s selcas, so maybe you should comment on some other fans twitter accounts too.“

huh?

what on earth is she talking about- OH NO.

you scramble to take your phone out, immediately clicking into your twitter notifications.

you groan when you see ‘y/nsuga’ is already trending. you should’ve double checked which account you were on before commenting, for god’s sakes!

this is amateur stuff, you scold yourself. how could you forget?

like yoona said, you begin commenting on other selcas, so it doesn’t look like you’re singling just one fan out.

(except you kind of already did that.)

yoona stifles a laugh. “so,” she says. “we’re not going to talk about how you commented three heart emojis on this guy’s selca on your secret account... right?”

your cheeks heat up. “please don’t tell the other girls.” you plead. jisoo unnie would never let you live this down.

it’s not your fault some of your fans are. like, really cute, okay?

this guy- ‘suga’. well, that’s the name you’ve been calling him in your head- since it’s the alias he goes by on twitter.

he was one of the first fan accounts opened on twitter- just when you debuted! he posts these detailed and insightful reviews every time you have new music, and he’s always been such a loyal fan!

(plus, it’s super fun seeing him shut down your haters!! he always comes up with the most awesome comebacks)

((your personal favourite is ‘y/n could single handedly step on you with the heel of her five inch stilettos while she continues to do the choreography perfectly. shut your bitchass mouth up’))

so is it a crime to check up on a devoted fan’s twitter page every once in a while... on your secret twitter account??

he still hasn’t replied to your comment, which you’re slightly down about. he’s just busy, you reason with yourself. it’s not like you can expect his world to revolve around you, you scold.

yoona nonchalantly waves her hand. “i already screenshotted the evidence though, so that’s going in my y/n blackmail folder.”

you let out a multitude of complaints, noises that mostly consist of various versions of ‘fuck you uwu’

at least it was yoona who found out first. she’s the most gentle in the group... even though she has blackmail folders for each of the members.

you reassure yourself by telling yourself that she’d never actually use the folders for real blackmail purposes.... probably.

looking down at your phone, you frown.

cute boy suga still hasn’t replied.

you don’t know it, but the only reason why is because he’s still screaming.

“AHHHHLHFH*HDFGLHHHHH?&$5FLIQJARSODFILJQWOI?!!!?!?!!”

#bts fanfiction #bts suga #min yoongi #min yoongi x reader #yoongi x reader #bts scenario #bts au #idol! reader #idol! au #bts imagine #bts fic recs #bts edits #yoongi smut #yoongi fluff #yoongi crack #yoongi fanfiction #btsgif #yoongi fic

225 notes · View notes

lastsonlost · 4 years

Text

Many of the women promoting the “cancellation” of men in comics, and demanding they post the recent empty promise known as #ComicsPledge, are in fact hypocrites. In this article, I’m going to present evidence of lies, collusion, rumor spreading, and, in my opinion, defamation and contract interference.

I personally know that they’ve colluded for YEARS to take down men. Specifically those with conservative politics and philosophies. This is an ongoing, coordinated effort. How do I know this?

Because I obtained access to their PRIVATE FACEBOOK GROUP.

This is Part 1 of the #Hypocralypse leaks

There is simply too much to put in one leak, so I will make the following three points for now.

1. The so-called Comic Book Whisper Network, which has been dismissed as conspiracy since 2016, is real, and I have hundreds of screenshots to prove it.

2. The Whisper Network has been targeting men and trying to destroy their careers, and use their connections in the comic book media to do so.

3. Whisper Network members have acted unprofessionally and unethically at best. At worst, they have engaged in what I believe could be illegal behavior.

MY STORY

I first heard about the Whisper Network back in mid-2016 from folks I knew at Image, DC, Marvel, and later, Valiant. Depending on who I chatted with, sometimes the group was called ‘The Women’s Network’, other times ‘The Whisper Network’, occasionally ‘The Whisper Campaign’, and eventually there were more conspiratorial names used mockingly (a friend called them a gender-swapped 4Chan, which became ‘FemChan’ to some insiders).

Regardless of the name, it was all the same group.

The same five or six names kept popping up in conversation over and again. As time ticked on, I noticed a trend on Social Media: half a decade of rumors, false allegations, cancellation attempts , and they almost always traced back to these same five or six people. The goal of this Whisper Network, according to industry folks, was simple: choose a target, smear them until they lose their reputation, their income, and are ultimately blacklisted – opening up job opportunities for the same people who started these smear campaigns in the first place.

Behind the scenes these “cancellations” are painted as morally or politically motivated, but in the end it’s all financial. As time passed, the group in question seemed more and more like a reality. I saw their influence. I saw things I knew to be verifiably untrue go viral online, appearing in what I thought were legit news sources. I felt angry and helpless seeing innocent people getting attacked, but did not know what to do.

A few years passed and by 2018 almost everyone I interacted with in the industry seemed to know about the Network, from top level editors right down to the letterers. It was an open secret, but no one was willing to speak up for fear of being targeted themselves. They knew the consequences.

And after all, this was a secret network. Without proof, there was no point in going public because members would just deny its existence, and use their media connections to smear anyone who challenged them.

THEN THINGS GOT INTERESTING

December 16, 2018, Whisper Network member Gail Simone, who joined the Network 6 years ago (4 years before the following tweet was posted), mocks “doofuses” who speculate that a “whisper campaign” exists.

At this point in late 2018, I was still skeptical of the Whisper Network’s existence. I’d heard many stories of individuals spreading rumors and lies, and plenty of malicious behavior was going on behind closed doors. Though I wasn’t ready to believe it was a coordinated effort, or collusion was involved. Then, certain people began openly mentioning the Whisper Network and my attitude changed.

March 26, 2019, Heather Antos, a member herself, did not outright mention the Whisper Network or her involvement, but she made what some took as a veiled threat to those who got on her bad side.

Heather “milkshake girl” Antos’ colorful backstory at Marvel, and later at Valiant, is notorious in the comic industry. A conversation about office rumor-spreading and bullying is never complete without someone bringing up a juicy Antos anecdote. Everyone has one.

Up until then, I still hadn’t seen ACTUAL PROOF of a larger scheme. But then, something changed in 2020.

January 8, 2020, Alex de Campi, who I would discover is one of the most active Whisper Network members, openly admits there is a Network. I have no idea if this was a slip or a brazen attempt to show off her power and influence, but this appeared.

Eventually, everything I had heard and read was confirmed beyond any shadow of a doubt after I gained access to their private Facebook group.

I WAS INSIDE THE WHISPER NETWORK!

This is the place where the Whispher Network has been colluding for years. And although their activity is not confined to just this site, from what I can tell, this was where they first met, and started their coordinated campaigns.

Members of the Secret Group called “Comic Book Women”

At present time, there are 440+ members of the secret Facebook group, called COMIC BOOK WOMEN. From what I can tell, a few are regular users, though many of them have never posted.

https://www.facebook.com/groups/comicbookwomen/

*unless you are a member, this will not show up in a search

Secret Facebook groups offer the same level of privacy as closed groups, but operate under a cloak of invisibility. No one can search for secret groups or even request to join them. The only way to get in one is to know someone who can invite you. Everything shared in a secret group is visible only to its members.

This secret group includes a list of members whose actions and connections speak for themselves. Members such as:

Zoe Quinn

Gail Simone

Alex de Campi

Heather Antos (aka Heather Marie)

Mags Visaggio (aka Magdalene Francis)

Mairghread Scott

And several key members of the group are women who work in the comics media and can be used to run damage control, including women like Heidi MacDonald of Comics Beat. They have contacts outside of the secret network as well, with some male allies in both comics and the media.

Just the fact that all of these folks were secretly linked in a private network came as a shock to me, considering their reputations and the accusations that they’ve made. Immediately I began to connect the dots…

They’ve denied for YEARS that they coordinate their actions in private. And yet they always coincidentally appear on Twitter, retweeting and amplifying each other’s accusations, signal boosting one another, and helping them gain traction. And their allies in media – Bleeding Cool and CBR specifically – will turn those same tweets into stories almost instantly & with no fact-checking or verification, sometimes within the hour.

I’m going to start explaining who the key actors are, and, from my perspective, how they coordinate these attacks.

KEY ACTORS

There are too many people to focus on at once, so I will have to break this into several posts, but I will start with one of the clear group leaders IMO.

Alex de Campi is well connected, despite never being part of the Big Two (since, from what I’ve been told management is well aware of her bullying, harassment, rumor-spreading and unethical behavior that goes back years, and depending on who you talk to she’s almost as notorious as Antos or Tess Fowler). She just wrapped up a graphic novel campaign on Kickstarter with David Bowie’s son, the Hollywood film director Duncan Jones. It grossed over $366K

All the while she makes baseless accusations while demanding transparency from everyone else.

Now, I’ll take you into their private network.

Two years ago, on May 13, 2018, De Campi launched a private campaign to target an independent creator, claiming she was using her connections to have Simon & Schuster cancel their book.

In addition to contacting the publisher, others in the Whisper Network coordinated their efforts to contact media outlets to have the narrative changed, according to the posts in this thread. Again, in my opinion, this could end up as a defamation or tortious interference case, and has many implications regarding media bias as well.

The following month, on June 23, 2018, de Campi posted private text messages between herself and writer Max Bemis in what appeared to be an attempt to damage his career. Despite Bemis being mentally ill (diagnosed with bipolar disorder in 2014), de Campi still posted the private messages with malicious intent IMO. According to US and UK law this is an actionable offense: posting private texts without both parties consenting.

431 notes · View notes