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captains-simp · 3 years

Note

Hi can you write a carol fic where carol and fem!reader are exes but reader is also a villain so she constantly pisses off carol just to get her attention 🥳 happy ending too plz

Girlfriends to enemies to yearning enemies to lovers??? Where has this idea been all my life?

1.5k words

[ masterlist ]

Buy me a coffee ☕

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

"She's at it again." Natasha sighed as she watched the TV screen carefully. Carol groaned loudly and hid her face in her hands, not wanting to look up at the screen to see the havoc you had caused.

"Fuck sake, y/n." Tony mumbled but felt a regrettable sense of pride deep down at seeing your latest handy work. Played to perfection. As always.

Stark had been your mentor once. Everything you knew you learnt from him and while he never would have taught you if he knew what you would do with his teachings, he couldn't deny that your skills were unmatched.

You never hurt anyone. Well. You never killed anyone. There was always someone who might have gotten a little battered in an explosion, but it was never your goal to murder. You just wanted a certain blonde's attention.

"Maybe you could-" Steve started but Carol cut him off as she grabbed her jacket from the back of the couch and called out over her shoulder.

"Yeah, yeah, I know the drill." She mumbled begrudgingly and left the common room area with a faint glow starting to appear around her.

You swung your legs excitedly as you watched the scene still unfolding beneath you.

The building was still ablazed. Appartments. Shitty shitty appartments. Every one of them had mold growing in the corners, damp in the ceilings, barely functioning heating and questionable water.

The people who lived there couldn't afford to upgrade or even repair their homes and the landlord wouldn't do anything. So you decided to burn it down.

Carefully planned, of course. Most of the preparation had been around securing future homes for those who lived in that shithole. It was a complicated process, especially giving the anonymity of it. But it would be successful. And the landlord? He would be stuck with a bill he should have been paying for a long time, you made sure he couldn't get the ex tenants to pay either.

It was a good day.

You weren't a vigilante as such. Not any more. You had given it a go but you didn't have the tracking or assassination skills of Natasha so you never got any big targets. It wasn't enough. Not when all you wanted was to prove you had the strength to look after yourself and then some. That was what it was all about.

You had worked tirelessly to prove it ever since Carol broke up with you. She had always been fiercely protective. But when insecurities and paranoia started building too high she couldn't shake the distressing thoughts that something could happen to you one day. Something that was caused because you were so close to her. Something she couldn't prevent.

She still loved you. That much you knew. That was what kept you going. You knew Carol wasn't overjoyed at the things you did, there were times you weren't either. But you had to get her back. She was the love of your life and you'd be damned if you gave up what you had the way she had.

It didn't take long for her to arrive. There wasn't anyone else around because while you didn't want to broadcast your location to everyone, it needed to be enough for the Avengers to find you.

"Hey baby!" You grinned up at Carol as she landed infront of you, stoic expression wavering at the enduring name. "How've you been?" You continued in a sing song voice.

"Stop that." She said, not as firmly as she hoped she would sound.

"Rough week?" You asked as you sat down on the ledge and patted the spot next to you. Carol looked around at her surroundings and you rolled your eyes.

"Fine, we'll go somewhere more private." You raised your voice at the last word, hoping whatever camera they had found you on had audio and picked up on what you said. Carol grimaced at the volume but followed you anyway.

"So how is work?" You continued and you strolled down the path next to the blonde.

"I'm not here for a catchup, y/n. But for your information you're making it a pain in my ass." She huffed and you smiled, remembering all the times she ranted about work to you. Now she probably ranted about you to work. Or did she never want to talk about you? Your smile dropped with your stomach at the thought but you quickly recovered.

"So what are you here to do, Captain?" You teased as you got to the bottom of the path and walked a few feet into an old tunnel and stopped to face Carol.

"You need to stop this, y/n." She said firmly. You considered her for a moment.

"Do you think I can look after myself?" You asked seriously.

"Y/n-" Carol sighed.

"Do you?" You continued, wanting to know more than anything. She looked up and considered you too.

It had been a year since she broke up with you, a year that you had changed a lot in. Not just mentally. Your once soft hands were now calloused and slightly red. Your soft smile now held something more to it, something that you had to keep back and locked away. There were scratches and cuts scattered across your body. But really what changed most was that you were alone. There was no one to watch your back anymore.

Despite your efforts to show Carol how strong you were, you were more vulnerable then than you ever had been in your life. Maybe that was why she finally had enough.

"I do. I think you always could." You nodded because yes, that's exactly what you wanted her to understand.

The blonde looked down at her own hands, her eyes flickering to yours every so often. You knew what she wanted. You reached out slowly and gently entwined your rough hands that seemed to still feel so perfect against her own.

"You've really been a pain in my ass, you know that?" She asked and you couldn't help but laugh because that's an understatement.

"So have you!" You exclaimed through a laugh. "You think blowing up buildings is easy?" Carol laughs this time, ready with a come back as always.

"Well for me it's-" You punched her arm before she could finish making her laugh more. God you missed that laugh.

"Cocky as always." You mused and stroked your thumb over the back of her hand. She hummed in agreement, clearly more focused on your movements.

"I'm meant to take you in." She admitted and you weren't quite sure what to do. Yes, you want Carol back. But your goal was always to make her see how capable you were. You had been blinded by the goal and done things she never would have approved on. Carol knew you were strong, but now you might have become someone she can't love. You never thought that far ahead.

"Just...visit me?" You asked hopelessly. She looked up at you and you were taken aback by seeing tears welling in her eyes. You untwined your hands in an instant and reached up to cup her face but felt tears of your own upon seeing her conflicted face.

It was only then that you stopped to realise everything she must had been through in that year apart. The things you put her through.

"I'm sorry." You admitted as tears streamed down your face. "I never meant to- I don't know I thought, well I wasn't thinking." You rambled in shame and Carol brought her hands up to your face too and brought you forward to rest your foreheads together.

"I missed you." She spoke out quietly. "I never stopped missing you, or loving you." She pulled away slightly to look you in the eye and you saw the truth shining back at you.

Then, she brought you closer again, closer so her lips were right next to your own. She stopped to hesitant, wondering if following her heart was the right choice. But when you closed the gap to kiss her she knew it was right. That you could figure things out like you always did.

You kissed her with everything that had built up inside of you for that year apart. The plans, the yearning, the love. All of it. You had waited such a long time to be with her again, unsure if it could even happen, and yet her lips felt as perfect against yours as ever. Like a distance had never grown between you.

Carol pushed you against the tunnel wall as she kissed you back with everything she had. You were everything to her. You always had been and it had never wavered.

When your lips became bruised and breathing became an issue you both pulled away and stood in each other's embrace for you didn't even know how long.

"What now?" You couldn't help but ask.

"We'll figure something out." Carol said as she laced your fingers together again.

"We?" You asked, wanting to pinch yourself to see if it was all real.

"Yes, you and me. Together." You sighed and pulled her closer towards you where you could burry your face in her neck.

"Thank you for giving me a chance." You whispered.

"Thank you for never giving up." Carol whispered back.

#carol danvers #captain marvel #brie larson #captain marvel imagines #captain marvel x reader #carol danvers x reader #carol danvers imagines #marvel

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swinterr · 3 years

Text

fic rec vi ♡

hi!

this is a another new set of fic rec and i’ll probably do a compilation of genre (?) just like the first ones.

made some changes like tidying up a bit and adding summary, for those that doesn’t have any summary i’ll try my best to add my own summary (it will probably be shit tho, i ain’t making a smut summary guys, i’m not confident in my describing a fic ability but i’ll try my best. if its in italic it means i made the summary hehez ) if the summary is shit, i made it okay.

read and support the fic and authors here: the fic rec ♡

a for angst

f for fluff

s for smut

// for series or list

nct

jeno

no title by @tyongf-nct | s

- smut blurb.

body guards and boyfriend by @pastelsicheng | f

- sometimes the only way you can really get some alone time with your boyfriend is by making his job hard.

lipstick smears by @kopikokun | f

- jeno never thought trying to get his makeup artist’s attention would be this hard.

jaehyun

[10:30] by @moonttaeil |

- a lockdown moment.

[2:40] by @nct-jungjaehyun | f a

- cute quality fluff time with bf!jae with a dash of angst.

[11:41] by @jeongvision | f

- family time with apples.

just like magic by @starryhyuck | f s

- jung jaehyun’s body count is almost as high as yours. however, after yuta spreads a nasty rumor, you learn that jaehyun’s always imagined those girls to be you instead.

love to hate me by @moonctzeny | s a

- you and jaehyun meet as sm trainees, developing a friendship until he debuts and you decided to leave the company and pursue a solo career. when you reunite again in a music show and he acts like he barely knows you, you stubbornly begin a series of hate-brimmed sex rendez-vous. your touch-and-go relationship continues on, until a song collaboration will force you both to deal with all your repressed feelings for each other.

moving on by @ddeonghwaa | f a

- reader has been chasing jae for some time but when she moved on jae suddenly enter the picture.

sun&moon by @ppangjae | f a

- asking jeong jaehyun to accompany you to your family’s 1-week christmas vacation as your boyfriend has its consequences. one can surely get through 1 week of pretending to be in love with an enemy, right?

snack run with a snack by @kopikokun | f

- on your usual movie night with the members, they assign you sudden snack collecting duty. you’re a little peeved, but at least jaehyun offers to tag along. Unfortunately for you, things really aren’t going in your favour tonight.

lover boy by @neoct-zen | f s

- bunch fics of lover boy jae and reader.

jungwoo

one more time, please by @haequarius | f s

- you don’t know what you and Jungwoo are, but you are certainly weak for him.

jealous by @whiplashsan | s

- jungwoo is all smiles and sunshine until he gets jealous, and he just so happens to get jealous over the smallest things when it comes to you.

doyoung

sugar, spice and everything not nice by @alreadyblondenow | s

- doyoung getting your ring size wrong, unprotected sex, kitchen sex, slight fingering, wedding tragedies.

no title by @ncteaxhoe | s

- dom!doyoung, rough? i need holy water.

the little one by @ethaeriyeol | f

- a gift of life; female reader x husband!Doyoung; fluff, light angst, married au

lucas

exquisite taste by @weishenkonbini | s f

- smut but with a fluffy ending.

for you always by @labyrinthsofyou | f

- in which you surprise yukhei when he forgets about your date.

6:19 by @cozykpopblurbs | f

- a cute fluff ft kun and winwin.

10:18 pm by @nctsoftarchives | f

- reader supports lucas at his superm debut stage.

16:47 by @sichengssmile | f s

- a fluffy smut. lucas a big boi.

missed you by @tokyobts | a f

- after you and yukhei broke up, yukhei still has feelings for you. he reaches out to you at school and tries to get you back. at first you avoid him but later his actions manage to make your heart flutter. you’ve come to a sudden conclusion that you maybe still want him in your life.

johnny

34 + 35 by @domjaehyun | s

- you and your husband johnny decide to take your marriage to the next step.

i couldn’t wait a little longer by @alreadyblondenow | s f a

- you two were never together longer than two days, but the feelings, oh the feelings that you have for each other is clear as the day. it was a never-ending try of making the relationship official. johnny tried, you tried but it never happens.

what happens in korea, not stays in korea by @alreadyblondenow | f s

- a week vacation in korea for your sister’s wedding became even more exciting when a famous dj had a crush on you. johnny was sure that it’s love at first sight. not putting both of your careers on the line, you two had no regrets when the time comes and you finally leave.

laundry day by @immabiteyou | s

- a domestic fluffy smut.

make a wish by @sluttyten | s f a

- you’re jungwoo’s sister, and he’s made it clear he wants you and Johnny to have nothing to do with each other. so you and johnny start fake dating to piss him off.

want it all by @sluttyten | f s

- you are entirely innocent to the point of being naive. johnny is not innocent, but he loves that you are because it means he can teach you everything you don’t know.

sungchan

wish i was her by @softsungchan | f a

- you wished you were her, laying in Sungchan’s arms and feeling his warm breath on your neck, giggling about sweet nothings whispered into the starry night. You wished for it to be you, the girl he liked.

2:21 am by @the32ndbeat | f

- sungchan being whipped, thru a text message.

haechan

14:52 by @ukiyoexo | f

- a cute haechan and reader ft the reader’s baby sister moment.

prince’s order by @nsheetee | f

- prince haechan nurses you after you faint, and orders you to stay with him until you feel better.

sweet treat by @markresonates | s

- haechan takes you for ice cream but all you can think about is sex with him. when you act like a brat, eventually you end up in the bathroom. with no panties.

clingy by @love-mi | f

- I’m not clingy! I just love your company and constantly want to be around you and have your full attention at all times

mark

hyuck is always right by @luvrenjun00 | f

- ceo!mark x reader ft baby donghyuck. a tooth-rotting fluff.

taeyong

snow storm by @whereisten | f s

- a fluffy smut whilst a snow storm.

1:59 by @smoll-tangerine | f

- reader and taeyong ft my favorite game (where i always die first) among us!

bts

taehyung

is this allowed 1 2 by @seokiie | f s

- how were you supposed to know bts would be filming at your coffee shop today? how were you supposed to know a certain curly-haired boy would take a liking to you?

cabin pressure | f by @jiminrings | f

- pilot!y/n who accidentally became famous bc of a viral post about her, best friend!jimin!, taehyung having a shy lil crush on you aND ot7 being meanies for a tad bit :((

art major!tae and biochem major!yn | f by @jiminrings | f

- tae’s cold and probably needs a friend more than he needs a model, y/n feels this nEED to take care of him, a term of enderment then a dash of emotional constipation and a sprinkle of jealousy :D

gank mid lane by @kimtaehyunq | f s

- gank / verb: (in a video game) use underhand means to defeat or kill (a less experienced opponent)

birthday surprise by @ephemeralkookie |

- like every year, you prepare a little surprise for your boyfriend’s birthday, one that you’ve been preparing for days. and after a very tiring day, taehyung only wants to spend the night in your loving arms.

jungkook

cookies & cream | s by @1kook | f s

- jungkook will watch a thousand cheesy christmas movies if it meant making you happy. (and maybe having his dick sucked.)

unholy night | s by @ephemeralkookie | f s

- after a christmas day passed with the Jeon’s family, Jungkook decides to transform the holy night into an unholy one.

‘a short’ abstinence | s a by @seokiie | s a

- maybe blue-balling you boyfriend (who has an insanely high sexual drive) wasn’t the best.

in which she’s done with him by @minstrivia | a

- jungkook angst/fluff where he always pushes oc away (who confesses her feelings but was cruelly rejected) and insults her but she always comes back to take care of him when he’s drunk or picks him up from his one night stands and she finally decides to leave him alone.

bad influence by @noteguk | s

- in which you know jungkook is a bad influence on you, but you can’t avoid falling for him every time.

jock!jk and shy art major!yn by @jiminrings | f

- established relationship ft. jock!jk and shy art major!y/n, y/n gets an unexpected pep talk and jungkook doubts himself, and either so much tears or so much dUST according to kook

special affair by @1oserjk | f

- sugar daddy au except it’s just jk spoiling u thru animal crossing

fairy of shampoo by @ironicarmy | f s

- sundays are for relaxation, house cleaning, and happiness.

abstract ft bob ross by @mimithings97 | f

- paintbrush in one hand, joint in the other and you sitting on his dick is what jeongguk wants. and what jeongguk wants, jeongguk gets.

badboy!jungkook by @jungshookz | f

- badboy!jungkook falls for good girl reader ft the boys and the reader’s apple.

growing by @lesgetittkookie | f

- dad!jungkook teacher his daughter how to walk. super super cute family/domestic fluff.

quiet, baby by @bratkook | s

- i don’t how to write a summary on smuts so imma just put this. reader and jungkook doing something in the subway.

still want that by @whatifyoulivelikethat | s

- fucking min yoongi ex-girlfriend? a terrible idea. being hopelessly in love with her at the same time? an even worse idea. knowing he was being used and still doing it anyway? ah, Jeon Jungkook, what are you doing? part 2 of savage love.

desiderium by @jeonggukingdom | f s

- “we’ve been at it like rabbits, how are you still so horny?”. a newlyweds!au smut.

chapstick by @softyoongiionly | f s

- based on the time Jungkook said he needed someone to scold him so he’d remember to put lip balm on. or jungkook’s had a really long day and the only that can make it better, is seeing you.

lover boy by @jingukk | f

- jungkook likes you. a lot.

unexpected confession by @sunkissedjk | f

- you gathered up the courage to confess your feelings, but it seems everyone in school knows about it before you could even find him.

string attached by @ephemeralkookie | s

- jungkook is what we can call your sexfriend. No strings attached, just you and him having fun and releasing the huge pressure and stress of being idols. But after spending an entire day together, you realize that maybe he’s not just your sexfriend.

no title by @himbojk | f s

- dilf jk.

astro

eunwoo

ceo!eunwoo by @m0onbean

no title by @yutopiada | f

- a cute idol!reader and eunwoo moment at a music show.

disney by @bangchan-sonyeondan | f

- a cute date with eunwoo at disney. reader likes vintage things hence using a disposable camera.

baby, it’s cold outside by @fresh-outta-jams | f

- a cute cold christmas fluff with eunwoo ft. the boys. reader went to the boys’ place for a sweater and cocoa gift exchange.

got7

yugyeom

cruel brothers by @imsarabum | f

- jackson and jaebum have always acted as if they were your big, overprotective brothers. so when they both walk in on you and yugyeom in a very intimate position, things get a little tense!

txt

soobin

a special night by @gyuluster | f

- an intimate insight on the first night of choi soobin’s wedding, consisting of kitchen floors, witches and an eternity of love.

boughs & branches by @jeogiyall | f

- decorating the tree with boyfriend! choi soobin from txt! fluffity fluff fluff with a lot of cute fluff thrown in and a dash of christmastime fluff.

sleepy binnie by @immabiteyou | s

- “i’ll let you do anything if you just touch me now. “ a sleepy soobin smut.

cake by @immabiteyou | s

- reading waiting for mc soobin with the guys. a cute fluffy smut moment.

kpop oc/s

seri by @ggukkiedae

anyway, thank you again for the writers please take care and be safe!

please free to recommend your favorite fic that i haven’t feature yet.

if the links won’t work and i labelled some fics wrong please let me know and i’ll try to fix it as soon as possible!

support the fic and the writers!

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bkdk-writings-dump · 3 years

Note

for a prompt could you do something with Prince Izuku and overprotective royal guard Kacchan? Congrats on 15,000 btw!!

Thanks for the prompt! This one was very fun to write! But I mean, I love fantasy AUs, so of course I enjoyed it :)

Midnight Rendezvous

Katsuki had been serving as Prince Izuku’s royal bodyguard since the day he completed his knight’s training at sixteen. He was of noble blood himself, which is part of how he landed the auspicious position in the first place, but also because he, being less than a year older than the prince, had been one of his playmates when they were young. They hadn’t seen much of each other in their early teen years, but when it came time to choose a bodyguard, that remembrance of a childhood friend was no doubt a draw, as there would be many times when keeping the prince company would be one of his duties.

In the three years Katsuki had been serving under him since, that old bond had slowly but surely rekindled into a new friendship. Izuku had been all too eager to chat with his bodyguard, but Katsuki felt it went beyond his duties to make more than smalltalk when necessary, and so remained very closed off for the first year or so of his employment. Izuku was as persistent as ever, though, and slowly wore down Katsuki’s walls, worming his way into the knight’s once-hardened heart.

Now, as much as he was loath to admit it, Katsuki was more fond of the prince than was likely appropriate: more fond, even, than he thought Izuku was even trying to make him. The truth was, he was desperately in love with the prince, but suffered every day to push down those feelings and never reveal them, since it would be impossible for Izuku to reciprocate them.

The other reason he suffered every day, though, was that the prince had a nasty habit of breaking rules and doing stupid things that put himself in danger, forcing Katsuki to constantly have to chase after him, go looking for him, and when he caught him, reprimand him for his foolish behaviour. Sometimes he theorized that Izuku only did it because he liked the attention or because he was bored, since somehow he knew well enough which things would be truly dangerous to do, and which things would verge on danger without truly presenting any consequences, and only went for the latter option. Thus, Katsuki had no choice but to let it go in the end, and Izuku never learned his lesson.

Frankly, Katsuki was getting tired of that. Partly because it made his job that much harder, and partly because Izuku’s recent string of escapes grated on his nerves for a far less noble reason.

Izuku had been sneaking from his room at night, tying his sheets together and using them to repel from his balcony and sneaking off to who knows where.

Katsuki, not allowed to actually wait up in the prince’s bedchamber for the sake of privacy, sat up and listened each night for sounds of movement just out in the hall, but somehow Izuku always evaded him, either being so quiet that he didn’t catch him, or perfectly timing his escapes to the moments when Katsuki inevitably drifted off. This left Katsuki restless from waiting up all night trying to catch the prince in the act, and annoyed because he could only guess there was one cause the prince had for stealing away each night; he must have a lover that he’s sneaking off to see.

Thus, Katsuki was also struggling between being genuinely frustrated with the prince’s lack of sense of personal safety, and being unfairly jealous that Izuku was visiting someone else in the night, leaving Katsuki to pine hopelessly for him without any chance of requitement in sight.

That very night, the prince had managed an escape again, and Katsuki had only realized it because it was windy outside and he heard the open panes of the window swinging out and hitting the wall. Alarmed by the noise, he’d entered the prince’s bedchambers to check on him, and found his bed empty and stripped. Enraged but completely unsurprised, he went to the open window and saw the usual rope of bed sheets hanging down, tried to one of the metal posts on the balcony’s railing. Katsuki groaned and ran a hand over his face. Why was this his fate: to endlessly and fruitlessly try to reign in the most foolish prince that ever lived?

Sighing, he pulled up the chair from the prince’s desk and took a seat next to the open window with his arms crossed. He’d pull up the bedsheets and close the window to force Izuku to find another way back into the palace just to teach him a lesson if that didn’t mean endangering the prince more, so instead he was forced to leave the evidence of his escape untouched and simply wait for him to return. He’d asked about getting locks for the windows when confiscating the key to the balcony door proved useless in stopping Izuku’s escapades, but somehow no one else quite took the prince’s safety as seriously as he did, and so his requests never came to fruition, and Izuku happily slid out through his window each chance he got.

And for what? Katsuki shut his eyes, rolling his head to the side as painful images of the prince in revelry with his secret lover at that very moment flashed through his mind. Katsuki hated that he didn’t even know who it was. He spent nearly every second of the day with the prince, and yet somehow he had missed that crucial moment; he hadn’t seen it when he fell in love.

He heard footfalls from below then, and straightened back up. The prince was returning, and he had to prepare his usual reprimands. Would he be harsh today, angry? Or disappointed, try to guilt trip him? He wasn’t sure he could manage anything so nuanced with the fiery rage of jealousy coursing through his veins, so when he heard the usual groans of effort that meant Izuku was climbing back up towards the balcony, he decided he’d just wing it, and say whatever came to mind, since his mind was already so focused on chastising the foolish prince anyways.

Outside, he heard Izuku haul himself back up onto the balcony, his feet hitting the stone and tired breath panting out. Katsuki gulped, keeping himself as quiet as possible as he listened to the prince gather up his bedsheets, toss them through the window, and then start to clamber through it himself. Katsuki sat waiting in the darkness for the perfect moment to reveal himself, when Izuku’s feet touched down right where he’d left the pile of bedsheets on the sleek, wooden floor, and as soon as he let go of the windowsill, he yelped and began to topple over, his foot slipping out from under himself.

“Izuku!” Katsuki yelled, instinctively sanding up and reaching out to stabilize him. He grabbed him by the shoulders and pulled him into his chest, and Izuku gasped and froze up, his back flush to Katsuki’s front.

“K-Kacchan!” Izuku stuttered out his nickname, and Katsuki gulped, heat rising to his cheeks at their closeness, but instead of letting go, he wrapped his arms tighter around his prince, trying to be protective, although somewhere, pushed deep to the back of his mind he knew he was just being possessive.

“What the hell do you think you’re doing?” Katsuki asked, growling right into the prince’s ear. Izuku shivered in his grasp, and Katsuki couldn’t help the satisfied smirk that rose on his lips.

“I-I… I tripped?” Izuku squeaked out.

“Ha! Nice try, but you know that’s not what I’m talking about,” Katsuki laughed, finally releasing the prince so he could slam the window shut and keep the cold breeze from chilling the room any further.

“How many times do I have to tell you to stay in your room at night?”

Izuku smiled at those words he’d heard a million times before, and Katsuki ground his teeth together. The prince thought this was some kind of game, didn’t he?

“I don’t know. As many times as it takes, I suppose,” he giggled.

“But you never listen! You never, ever just-just…!” Katuski huffed, the words getting stuck in his throat he was so frustrated.

“Do as I’m told?” Izuku finished for him with the cutest little tilt to his head.

“Ugh!” Katsuki threw his hands over his eyes. That was the other problem: it was so hard to be angry with him when he was so adorable all the time. He must have got away with everything as a tiny tot with those big ol’ doe eyes, and now he was still just as spoiled.

“Don’t worry Kacchan, nothing happened. I’m totally fine! See?” Izuku said, reaching out to take one of Katsuki’s hands and put it over his heart so his guard could feel that it was still beating. Katsuki felt his cheeks flush, feeling the prince's pulse under his skin for longer than was probably necessary, but then he ripped his hand away and averted his eyes.

“I can tell that much, obviously,” he scoffed. In the corner of his eyes, he could see Izuku’s smile falter slightly.

“Well, is that all, then? Or are you going to give me a time-out, too?” Izuku joked, though there wasn’t much heart in it. Katsuki turned to him with one eyebrow raised, and Izuku shifted from one foot to the other, eyes flitting away and a blush on his cheeks if Katsuku’s eyes were seeing right even in the dark room.

“What, do you like it when I reprimand you?” Katsuki asked, mostly as a joke, but then Izuku was reaching down to snatch up his pile of sheets and burying his face in them as he brought them back over to his bed.

“I do not!” he yelled, muffled into the fabric, his embarrassment ringing through clearly.

“You do! You absolute idiot, you do!” Katsuki laughed, following him to the bed with an amused smile on his face.

Izuku sighed, then, dropping his sheets onto the bare mattress and turning back to face Katsuki with his arms crossed.

“And? What of it?” he asked, pouting adorably.

“Nothing. I’m just surprised,” Katsuki shrugged.

“And I’m surprised it’s taken you this long to realize,” Izuku huffed, and then Katsuki dropped his smile, brows creasing as he thought over the implications of that. If he really felt that way – but then, no, that didn’t make any sense.

“Well,” Katsuki muttered, his anger and jealousy rearing it ugly head once again. “It’s a cruel game you’re playing, making me so damn worried about you all the time.”

“I–” Izuku opened his mouth, but whatever he wanted to say got stuck in his throat.

“No, no, I don’t want to hear you try and justify it. I’ll be too tempted to believe you,” Katsuki rolled his eyes, but then found himself biting his lip, tempted to say more. “Izuku, honestly. Who is so important that you have to go out there and risk your life each night to see them?”

“What?” Izuku blinked in surprise, his arms dropping.

“You know what I’m talking about, don’t act stupid now,” Katsuki huffed, his eyes datring between Izuku’s face and the unmade bed in front of them, unable to hold eye contact for more than a second at a time.

“No. No, I don’t. You think I’m going to see someone?” Izuku tilted his head in that perfectly adorable, curious way, and Katsuki felt his cheeks flare as he finally lost it.

“What the hell else would you be doing? I’m not stupid, Izuku, I know the markings of a lover’s tryst when I see one, and you–you–you–”

“I what? What, Kacchan, spit it out already so I can explain to you how very, very wrong your assumption is,” Izuku shouted back, looking just as angry and hurt.

“Huh?” Katsuki came to a full stop, completely taken aback.

“Oh, now he’s quiet,” Izuku rolled his eyes, and then reached out to grab the front of Katsuki’s shirt, pulling his face down so their lips crashed together in a searing kiss, all that anger melting easily into passion – a shared passion, if Katsuki’s senses weren’t deceiving him, which, when Izuku lips parted from his and he had a moment to think, completely shattered his perception of reality.

“Wait, what?” he said, blinking fast and staring blankly at the prince he was so shocked and confused.

“I’m not sneaking out to see anyone, you idiot. I’m sneaking out to get your attention!” Izuku admitted, his cheeks so flushed by then Katsuki knew for sure they were red, even in the darkness. “It’s the only time you… you… seem to actually care about me, when I do something reckless and you have to reprimand me… tell me how p-precious my life is and how hard you work to protect it.”

“W-what?” Katsuki shook his head. “Then where the hell are you going at night?”

“I don’t go anywhere in particular,” Izuku shrugged. “I just walk around the gardens long enough until I think you’ve probably noticed and then come right back, hoping you’ll be up here waiting for me.”

“But… why like this? With the sheet and the balcony and in the middle of the night? Surely you see how it all looks?” Katsuki asked.

“I – well, I do now, but assure you I wasn’t thinking very much about the escaping part,” Izuku admitted, and then bit his lip as he moved closer once more, taking one of Katsuki’s hands into his and squeezing apprehensively. “I was much more focused on the coming back part, and how…” he paused, gulping, “How it would mean we’d been alone together, in my room, in the dark, with you all… all angry and passionate and concerned. Surely you can see how that all looks?”

“I… hadn’t thought of it that way…” Katsuki admitted, his voice clawing its way out of his throat.

“Well… are you thinking about it now?” Izuku asked, pressing closer until he was practically rubbing up against Katsuki’s side.

“I – Prince Izuku, you realize this is highly inappropriate, don’t you?” Katsuki asked, but his voice was breathy and he couldn’t make himself pull away.

“Somehow I don’t think you care about that as much as you say,” Izuku responded, his big green eyes shining even in what little moonlight slipped into the dark room, and Katsuki felt his roslove break like a dam against a flood: how he could he ever say no to those eyes?

“Damnit, Izuku,” he cursed, and then took the prince by his waist, pulling him in so their chests were flush against each other before kissing him, slow and sweet at first, but as Izuku softened to the touch, his arms coming rest around Katsuki’s shoulders, the pair pressed closer and closer still, until they were ravishing each other with all the passion of years of repressed feelings.

Panting, Izuku pulled away with eyes lidded and lips kiss-swollen, and Katsuki watched with a particular glee he’d never experienced before as a strand of spit still connecting them thinned and the split, dripping down each of their chins in a mirrored line.

“Does this mean you’ll behave from now on?” he asked, not really caring if it killed the mood, and Izuku giggled, shaking his head.

“Kacchan!” he chastised by slapping a hand to the knight’s shoulder, but then he settled himself down, and was smiling up at him with just as much love and lust and teasing intention as before.

“Maybe… but oh, I do love to watch you chase after me,” he said.

“You rascal,” Katsuki clicked his tongue, and then squeezed his arms around Izuku as he dipped his head to nip at the skin of his neck.

“Eep!” Izuku startled, squirming in his grasp, but soon let out a breathy moan that revealed how much he really liked the attention, and melted pliantly into Katsuki embrace.

“You make my job miserable, you know that?” Katsuki asked, the words breathed right into Izuku's ear. The prince shivered deliciously, but even all that wasn’t enough to make him docile in his answer.

“Interesting,” he corrected. “I make your job interesting.”

“That you do, prince,” Katsuki scoffed, but there was nothing mean in it, and he promptly returned to lavishing Izuku’s neck with kisses and bites, enjoying all the sweet sighs and moans he elicited from his sweet little prince.

Interesting, indeed. If keeping the prince company in this way was to be part of his job, now, Katsuki supposed all the headaches and frustration had been worth it in the end.

#bakudeku #katsudeku #izukatsu #my fic #prompt fic

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leonardhoee · 3 years

Text

Ikevamp OC: Sandro Botticelli

Birthday: March 1, 1445

Zodiac Sign: Pisces

Height: 173cm (5’8)

Past Occupation: Artist

Vampiric Type: Lesser Vampire

MBTI Personality: ENFJ- A

Build: Lean, but toned. He says his best feature is his ass. Everyone agrees

Fashion Style: Modern day Sandro would wear light academia or cottage core. He would also wear a maid dress or skirt just because he’s proud of his thighs. In Ikevamp’s time period however, his priority is always comfort. He’s wear leather pants with either a white silk or cotton button up. (Tiddies out ofc because he is shameless)

Background: Turned in 1510 by Lorenzo de Medici, Botticelli was initially unaware that he had even died and been resurrected as a vampire. As someone who greatly appreciates life, he was angry at first about being brought back without his permission, and immediately left the Medici court. For several decades he traveled the world and realized there was so much undiscovered beauty just waiting to be discovered and immortalized by him. Since then he made it his goal to seek out that beauty wherever he could, and create a painting so extravagant and ethereal that it would put the sun, moon, and stars to shame.

Personality: He is one of the most outgoing people in the mansion. He is not afraid to speak his mind and often compliments random people he meets in town. He is very genuine, almost to a fault. He always sees the good in others and can be a bit naive at times, only because he choses to believe people at face value. His authenticity and trust in others, inspire the people he cares about to believe in themselves and become more confident. He also tends to have a flair for the dramatic, basically the embodiment of “I’ll get over it, I just need to be dramatic first”. He can be a bit dreamy and carefree, tossing awareness of his surroundings. (One time he went horseback riding with Leonardo and saw a pretty flower. He spaced out, thinking about how he would paint it in the hands of a beautiful person and ended up getting thrown off his horse when he almost rode into a tree. A true himbo). His carefree attitude however, can leave him a bit detached from people. While he’s very empathetic, he doesn’t know what to do when those emotions are coming from him. Finding beauty is his motivation after being brought back, but what happens when he realizes beauty isn’t the only reason he’s so drawn to you?

In Love: At first, he simply thought he was attracted to you for your beauty. After all, that’s the reason he was drawn to people in the past. He understand’s beauty very well, but he doesn't know what true love feels like from his own perspective. A major conflict for him would be realizing that the reason his heart races after time you smile at him, isn't because he simply finds you worthy of his art. He is hopelessly in love with you.

“Oh don’t worry, I’m just holding your hand because its pretty haha...”

He can be oblivious at the beginning and won’t understand why you’re jealousy that he’s admiring other people for their beauty. It’s only because he wants them to be art subjects right?

But once he has come to terms with his feelings, he will be the sweetest lover you can ask for. You are a goddess to him, his one and only muse, and he will make sure you know that he worships every single part of you. (He will definitely ask to paint you nude because “beauty such as yours absolutely must be captured. I only hope I can capture your radiance the way you deserve Amore”)

Hobbies: Painting, Meddling in people’s business, Stargazing

Dislikes: Dishonest and close minded people, Spicy Food

Favorite Food: Crème Brûlée

Hated Food: Banana

Weaknesses: Physical fighting, Math, Situational awareness.

Speciality: Making people smile, Chaos

Extra Things:

-Lorenzo brought him back because he believed it would be a waste for the world to loose such talent so quickly.

- He arrived at the mansion to surprise Leonardo after hearing he was still alive. It was supposed to be a temporary stay but he fell in love with Paris and asked Comte if he could move in with them.

- Sandro is a great singer and dancer and is often asked by Mozart to sing one of his pieces for him. However he only agrees if he is allowed to draw Mozart after. (He can’t help it, Mozart and Jean are so ethereally beautiful, they just have to be drawn.)

- While he is extremely talented artistically, he doesn't know how to cook, wash dishes, or hail a carriage. Sebastian has officially banned him from the kitchen after he set the cupboards on fire trying to make a cake. (Theo nearly had a stroke after taking a bite and realizing he mixed up the salt and sugar)

- He is already very hyper, and he is not allowed to touch coffee. One time Arthur gave him a cup and he was awake all night trying to turned all the residents into the perfect models. He carried their sleeping bodies to the garden and arranged them to resemble the 12 Olympians. Jean woke up the next morning curled up at Comte’s feet and since then he has banned Botticelli from visiting his room or painting him.

- Botticelli originally met Leonardo while they were both studying in Verrocchio’s workshop, and he considers Leo to be like an older brother to him. Being the two college-age dumbasses they are, they decided to move in together and start working as waiters in a nearby restaurant. After most of the staff died from the plague, Leonardo came up with the bright idea of rebranding the restaurant, calling it called "Le tre rane di Sandro e Leonardo" (the Three Frogs of Sandro and Leonardo), and serving gourmet cuisine. It ended up being a failure because most of their customers were not used to the innovative new food being served.

- A threeway with Leonardo is definitely a possibility for you.

- He has a pet peacock named Juno.

- Sometimes he lays down in the garden and watches the clouds imagining different animals based on their shapes.

- Surprising Botticelli is very good friends with Dazai, and his positive outlook on life has helped Dazai appreciate his own existence. None of the other residents understand their conversations but it makes perfect sense between them.

- He cannot handle spicy food. One time Dazai slipped chili powder into his dinner and his face turned red while he teared up. To this day he internally shudders every time he sees the others eating something spicy without flinching.

- He tries to avoid conflicts as much as he can because he tends to get emotional very quickly. Being so empathetic can be draining to him and getting into a fight hurts him more than it will ever hurt the other person.

- He loves making random sketches of you and the other residents, and he will leave them your respective rooms with a small note reminding everyone that they are appreciated.

- His love language is physical touch and he has a habit of kissing everyone on the cheek or forehead.

- Something about Napoleon’s room is so cozy and welcoming that it makes him sleepy. He’s woken up cuddling Napoleon many times. Yes they have kissed each other.

- Though, he doesn’t like taking naps with Leonardo because sleeping on the floor makes all his bones hurt.

- He has a sweet tooth that rivals Theo. Between the two of them, any desserts Sebastian buys, are eating within 2 days.

- Sandro loves shopping with Comte and he constantly asks Leonardo to let him pick out a new wardrobe. He cringes every time he sees those mismatched boots.

- Shakespeare is the only resident that makes him a bit wary. He is very good at figuring out when people are lying and Will’s personality unsettles him.

- Besides Leonardo, Vincent is his favorite resident. Sandro appreciates how kind and welcoming he is, and his favorite pastime is painting with him. If he ever hears people talk bad about Vincent he will not hesitate to give that person a piece of his mind.

- Sandro is a bi king who develops crushes very easily, but most of them are fleeting and superficial. He had a major crush on Leonardo that he quickly got over after they became friends. When they lived together, Leo would often tease him for his habit of falling for people so quickly and moving on within a week.

- Modern Botticelli would be a major Ariana Grande, Harry Styles, and FKA Twigs fan.

- One time he was running to show Dazai a pretty butterfly he found and he was so distracted by it that he didn’t notice the tree branch right in front of him. He ran into it so hard that he knocked himself out for 30 minutes and Napoleon had to carry him back inside the mansion.

Other characters he is similar to: Ranpo Edogawa, Tamaki Suoh, Grell Sutcliff

I’m going to be using Ikevamp Botticelli so you can follow that tag if you want to hear more about him!

#ikemen vampire #ikevamp #ikevamp oc #ikevamp botticelli

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extremelyblackandwhite · 4 years

Text

exile

pairing: carter baizen x reader

warnings: angst & smut (18+)

a/n: this one has been in the working for a while. enjoy.

based off “exile” by taylor swift and “tightrope” from the greatest showman

I think I’ve seen this film before and i didn’t like the ending, you’re not my hometown anymore so what I’m defending now? You were my town now i’m in exile seeing you out. I think I’ve seen this film before ...

The music was softly loud in a manner that one could only describe as annoying for conversation starts. Women dressed in the newest gowns straight of the catwalk and men tied up into various shades of suits. People walked around carrying trays of expensive champagne and every corner of the room seemed to have an ice sculpture everywhere. Everything was splendid and wondrous but Carter was much more interested in the figure leaned against the marbled column. Hair pulled up and held by several golden pins, skin decorated in white ruffled fabric descending up to her knees, matching heels on her feet as a key shaped necklace hanged from her neck. She was like a vision of time, an hallucination of a memory that was long, long gone. She was gone but near and Carter couldn’t help but feel all his pride slowly slip away from him.

If there was a woman who could say she had held his heart, it was Y/N. She was the daughter of one of his father’s friends, a partner and share owner in most of the law firms around New York, and a French socialite. She carried herself with the elegance and innocence that no Upper East Sider had and Carter had been hopelessly enamoured with her. How could he not? He could still close his eyes and see her, he could the very first time he met her, his mother surrounded by other ladies at tea laughing about new founded gossip but there she was, sat in the chair swirling the platinum spoon on the warm liquid of her tea cup.

She always found a way to make him laugh, she could always find a way to make him feel like he wasn’t as shallow as he thought he was. Carter loved her the way he could love no other woman but he had to let her go. Her father clearly wasn’t found of having his only child, his precious daughter, dating an ex gambling addict with a bad reputation, and as such he sent her away. She had asked him to help her, she didn’t want to go somewhere alone but he didn’t. At the end of the day he knew he would eventually break her heart. He had tried writing her but every letter he wrote her came back, unopened. He wondered why she was back, out of all places she had decided to go to Columbia. She hated New York, she always hated the fake plastered smiles and the ambitions her parents had for her, she hated the noise and would much enjoy to run away to the Hamptons during Autumn and Winter. Carter still remembers driving down to the Hamptons near twilight to find her laying on top of an old blanket. It was tattooed on his brain, the serene look on her face as she pulled onto the worn out sleeves of a sweatshirt she had purposely bought oversized. Sadly, alongside with that memory was the memory of him driving away from her home, leaving before she could even notice.

- Carter. - he turned around at the mention of his name, an old lady stood in front of him whom he could swore was Y/N’s grandmother. Or, at least, the one she enjoyed to speak about. - I didn’t know you were in town.

- Sister’s getting married.

- My congratulations to Caroline. - she smiled. - Oh, have you met my granddaughter? She should be here somewhere here.

Carter was going to refuse meeting a granddaughter he already knew a bit too well, at least better than her father would’ve liked, but the woman had a death like grip on his tailor velvet black suit and was already walking him Y/N’s way. His throat ran dry and he felt his body fill with static like feelings as she turned around at her grandmother’s request. There, at the sight of her face beautifully and delicately preserved in time with little to no signs of time pulling on the skin, he felt like he was the old type of man, ready to drop everything at the belief that someone was made just for him. She stared at him as if she had seen a ghost, a dead being which had never left her but that she was only noticing now.

Second, third, and hundredth chances, balancin' on breaking branches. Those eyes add insult to injury. I think I've seen this film before and I didn't like the ending. I'm not your problem anymore so who am I offending now? You were my crown now I'm in exile seein' you out. I think I've seen this film before so I'm leavin' out the side door

The parties were always the same no matter how much time had passed. The glittering chandeliers and fake smiles for seeing someone whom they hadn’t seen in ages and could barely remember the name. Lily van der Woodsen had been the one to host the party, insisting to Y/N’s mother she should attend as a way to get to know some of Columbia’s students but there was no one that Y/N didn’t already know. She had gone to Constance for a few years until her father decided she was clearly going through a dark path. A dark path named Carter Baizen.

Last she’d heard of him he was doing some humanitarian documentary work but others perceived him as more of a intense gambler rather than the portrait of humanitarian. Other than that, she’d never seen him since she was 17 going on 18 on his car listening to his favourite bands and discussing running away. After her father sent her to Connecticut for boarding school for her companies with the eldest Baizen child, she didn’t hear from him ever again.

As she sipped on her second glass of champagne, she heard her grandmother’s voice booming which made her turn around to see the last person she’d ever expect to see. Once again, she was merely a young girl waited on the steps of her apartment, constantly checking the watch for a man that never came. Things were never clear but looking at him, looking into those eyes only added salt to a wound which had never healed and was instead covered through layers and layers of “You’ll be alright”.

- This is my Y/N. She’s gonna be a human rights lawyer, we’re so proud of her. - her grandmother poured out love and pride in her voice, something Carter definitely didn’t use to hear from her own mother. - Y/N, this is Carter Baizen. He’s Caroline’s brother, you two went together to Constance. Do you remember?

- We’ve met before. - there was a sort of icy softness to her voice, no longer the honeyed, happy sound she used to speak in whenever they would walk down the Upper East. No, this was cold, almost as if she had surrounded herself by walls yet soft as if she was still able to show the cracks in her armour. Heaviness settled in him, looking at her, looking at the one he would dub as the one who got away. She didn’t get away, he went away.

- I should go check on the other guests. - her grandmother excused herself leaving the ex almost lovers staring at each other through mirrors of past distorted memories.

- I didn’t know you were at Columbia. - he grabbed one of the passing glasses of champagne, not entirely sure of what to say. He never knew what to say near her but this time, this time he knew nothing he could say would made up for what he did.

- Brown isn’t what I had in mind so I transferred after I finished my first year. Dad thought Columbia would be a good fit. - she stood too far from him, further than he’d like. She used to always be so close, so close he could smell her vanilla and honey perfume, so close he could feel the fabric of her clothing against his hands. Close enough to consider kissing her but that was no longer the case, she was far and her heart was locked. - What about you Carter? Last I heard you were in Machu Picchu.

- My uncle got me an chief financial officer job at his company in London. Been spending some time with Serena but I’m mostly here for Carolines’ wedding.

- Serena? She was at the same boarding school as me. Didn’t know you two were close.

- I guess you could say we are close. On and off.

Her curious facade fell as the corner of her lips almost falling into a frown. She didn’t know what to feel if anger or sadness but as a tray passed by, she set down her half full glass on the silver tray before mumbling “excuse me”. She moved through the crowds of people with her hand in front of her eyes, strangled cry in her throat.

- Y/N, wait. - he followed her, he followed her like he should’ve done years ago. He chase her up the stairs of the van der Woodsen residence, knowing it like the palm of his hand, however she was still faster than him and rushed over to the small balcony on their guest bedroom, stomach hitting the metal railings which adorned the small outside place. - Y/N!

So step right out, there is no amount of cryin' I can do for you. All this time, we always walked a very thin line. You didn't even hear me out (you didn't even hear me out), you never gave a warning sign (I gave so many signs). All this time I never learned to read your mind (never learned to read my mind). I couldn't turn things around (you never turned things around) 'cause you never gave a warning sign (I gave so many signs) ...

- I really don’t want to speak to you. - she let the tears flow down her face in silence, regretting how her mind seemed to show her images of the times when things were clearer. Times when they would just be kids joking around in central park or times when she would purposely let her hand wander, hoping he would grab it but he never did. The times she would look him into the eyes for longer than usual, hoping he would try to kiss her, but he never did.

- C’mon, dove. - he walking up to her but she moved away.

- Don’t call me that. - she punctuated every single word as if he had offended her.

- Why are you upset?

- Why am I upset? - she lifted her head, streaks of black mascara rushing down her face. She’d been here before, she’d been disappointed before and she didn’t like it so why was she here again? Why didn’t she just ignore him and went back into the carefully constructed world she had built for herself. - You always told me you were afraid of commitments, that you didn’t want to be shackled down to anyone and I understood it. I understood it and stood by you and waited, waited for things to change and you ... you just weren’t worth it. You wasted my time only to get on a relationship with Serena out of all people. You just weren’t worth it.

It stung, it stung worse than anything he’d ever felt before. He wasn’t worth it, he just wasn’t worth it and he knew it. What he didn’t know and was still processing as if he was living some twisted dream was her words. She waited, he knew she had waited for him but he didn’t know what else she had waited for. Suddenly all those fall nights in the beach where she would fall asleep on his shoulder, trying to pull her out of revision sessions after she started crying due to stress, her pretending to let him win whenever they played poker. She had waited and she was right he wasn’t worth it.

- Why Serena? - she questioned, heart heavy with emotions too ugly for her to even let unfold.

- I don’t know.

- Do you wanna know how long I waited for you on those stairs? - he wanted to say no, he didn’t want to remember it, he didn’t want to think of it. - I waited for 5 hours, I waited as long as I could until my parents shoved me on that train because of you. You didn’t write or ...

- I wrote you everyday. - he still had those letters, stacked on top of his wardrobe in England wrapped in the red string she used to wear around her hair like a headband and had left in his drawer during a particular cold day. He thought he should’ve burn them years and years ago, let it go but something stopped him. The mere thought of her just touching the letters stopped him from discarding them, from burning the only thing which was still hers. - You sent back each and every letter.

- I never got any letter from you. - she wanted to scream at him for using his lines, his tricks on her. - Stop lying to me.

- I wrote to you everyday for two years. - he grabbed her arm, impeding her from leaving this time. As if this simple act could make up the biggest mistake of his life. - I wrote to you every day and when I stopped having any words I wrote down all your favourite love letters. After two years, I thought ... I thought you probably had someone and I didn’t want to ruin that for you.

- You wrote to me? - she softened, almost as if she couldn’t believe his words. Her mother definitely would’ve told her not to believe him, “the Baizen’s have a way with words, no wonder they have a publicity and ad agency” and her father would send her straight to Brown if he even dared to dream his precious and only daughter was back with the man he had sent her away from. Her inhibitions fell like a castle of cards and blew away as she stared at the man whom she had loved since she was fifteen and had last seen at seventeen years old. She should know better, she was three years older, no longer innocently in love with the older boy from St. Judes. She should know better, she should know better but she didn’t and looking into his eyes and then his lips she decided to do something she shouldn’t.

Placing on herself on her tippy toes, she held his shoulders and leaned her lips against his. Carter immediately grabbed her, afraid she would slip away or that she was some fragment of his drunk imagination but no, she was here. As he held her close to his body, lips moving in such a synch it could be describe as symphony like, he could feel her, he could feel her warmth, the ruffles of her dress against his fingers. No, she was here. She was here.

The two of them stumbled backwards into the guest bedroom, too heated in their minds to care about the fact the door was unlocked. His hands came up to the straps which held her dress to her body, ripping it off her and leaving her in a probably too expensive white lacy lingerie with a tiny jewel in the middle of her chest. He was too worried to feel her, to kiss her to even look at her racy form, ever so beautifully revealing. Her finger danced over his jacket, pushing it off him. He helped her discard of the jacket, throwing it somewhere in the room and thus interrupting the kiss. She laid against the expensive Egyptian cotton sheets, and that’s when he first took a good look at her. The lingerie looked tailor made, almost glued like a second skin, enhancing her bossom which he only wanted to lay his face on. His lips were partially open, hair broken open from its confines and sprawled all over the white sheets. Fuck, she was a vision.

He climbed atop her, eyes fully darkened with lust as he stood over her before leaning to kiss her again, hand pushing on the back her knee and caressing the skin of her thigh. His other hand came to her back, releasing the strap which held the garment in place. He was just a simple pull away from seeing it, from seeing her in what he only dreamed off in drunk nights. He didn’t want to pull it away just yet, he wanted to look at her and look he did. There was so many things he wanted to do to her but right now he just wanted to bask in her intimacy but she was not interested in that, trembling hands coming to unbutton his white shirt, pushing it down his arms. His once soft skin was now defined, no longer the 18 year old he was but someone whom she would thought to be out a men’s health magazine. Her hands moved through his chest, feeling the ridges and scars of time that had laid there before they lowered to the zipper of his trousers.

- No, dove. - he grabbed her hands in his, putting them above her head and holding them there. - No, let me take care of you.

He started to kiss her neck, starting at right at the end of her ear down to her collarbones and up to the start of her breast where skin meet the lace of her lingerie. Slowly, he pushed the garment off her, mouth lowering to take her nipple in between his lips. The girl let out a soft moan, hand tangling in his polished hair as changed attentions to her other breast sucking hard enough to leave marks. She wanted his marks. She wanted to bare them, to do the wrong thing. He moved from her chest down to her navel, making her moan at the lack of teasing until he got too close to her mound. He looked up to her, devilish spark in his eyes.

- Tell me, dove. How well did they fuck you in boarding school?

- I will if you tell me how well you fucked Serena.

- Oh, dove ... are you jealous? - his eyes flickered with a sense of wild pride he couldn’t explain. Her moved up, licking his lips before kissing her jaw. - Don’t be jealous, my little dove. I thought of you every time I fucked her.

His fingers moved inside of her all her making her hold onto his neck, pushing him onto the space between her neck and shoulder. He smiled, biting onto the plump skin while he pressed his fingers deeper into her heat. His fingers moved in and out of her, slowly, teasingly, pushing sweet yet pornographic sounds from her as he hit that perfect spot. His thumb rubbed abstract-like figures on her hardening clit, putting her in a hypnotising-like state which made her reply to each and every move he had.

- Fuck ... coming here to the Upper East in that little cocktail of yours. You’re all grown up aren’t you, dove? Fuck, I missed you. - he pressed his thumb harder on her climb, kissing from the spot he had just bitten to her shoulder, only to bite it too. That sure would leave a mark her daddy would love to see, oh he surely would love to. - Are you close, dove?

- Carter ... - she moaned in want, feeling that familiar knot only she could cause herself starting to tighten.

- You’re so fucking stunning. - he rose his head from her shoulder, crashing his lips against hers and his fingers keep moving in and out at a now faster pace. She breathed in and out, letting out sounds which only incentivised him to keep going, small smile on his lips as he keep kissing her, teeth grazing at her bottom lip. She could feel the knot tighten until it suddenly released, having her moan against his lips as the sound turned into pure static energy. - Aren’t you a stunner? Don’t fall asleep on me just yet, dove.

She could barely move her head, still recovering from her orgasm as he left her lips to pull down her zipper. Looking up as well as she could, she watched him remove his formal trousers along with his underwear revealing his sizeable member. Mindlessly, she bite her lip, smirking through her daze as he pumped himself a couple of times, pre-cum gathering at the red tip of his member.

- You’re not a good girl at all, are you dove? - he questioned in a teasing manner before returning to top her, grabbing her hands once more and holding them tight above her head. He ran the tip of his member up and down her slit, collecting the wetness from her former orgasm. - Come on, dove. Tell me, tell me you’re mine.

- I ... I’m y...yours. - she spoke through the breathlessness that he seemed to naturally caused in her not expecting the harsh thrusting to begin as soon as those words exited her mouth. He held her hands thightly, thrusting into her in and out with little to no gentleness. He couldn’t do gentle and she didn’t want him to do so, relishing as he seemed to hit her g-spot which sent her eyes rolling to the back of her head. - Carter, I’m yours.

- I fucking know, dove. I know. - he said through his teeth, growling at the way her pussy milked him in such a way he needed more self control than ever. He continued with no relent, free hand coming to rub her nub which made her lose whatever inhibitions she had left. She was putty in his hands, moaning mindlessly without a care in the world.

- I’m gonna cum. - she cried out, turning her head to the side as he leaned to kiss her neck, noticing how hard it was becoming to ignore how she was milking him. Few more thrusts and she came crashing from the high she had been in since the start, moaning his name out loud as he growled before collapsing to her side, not wanting to hurt her. She let out a shaky breathe, feeling him cum drip out of her and onto the sheets. This surely was no house guest etiquette but she really wasn’t in the mood to care.

He turned his head to look at her, sweat dripping from her forehead and gluing the hairs close to it to her skin as her chest went up and down trying to calm down her heart rate. She was surely a sight. He carefully threw an arm over her, pushing her flush with his body before kissing the top of her head.

- I’m so sorry. - he blurted out, not sure what to say, how to apologise for things that were long gone. - I’m so sorry.

- Just stay this time. - she kissed the palm of his hand. - Just stay.

- I will, dove. I promise.

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mortedeveles · 3 years

Text

broken bones & broken hearts.

SUMMARY: At the end of the day, you realize that as best friends or lovers, Oikawa Tooru and you are never meant to be together.

PAIRING: Tooru Oikawa x fem!reader.

THEMES: ANGST- just angst, romance, childhood friends to lovers. [ONE-SHOT] [CUPID’S ARROW WRITING EVENT]

WORD COUNT: 5.7K (around 5744 words)

TAG’S AND TW’S: mental health issues, angst themes, breaking up, relationship issues, neglection, mentions of injuries & blood, somewhat suggestive content (sex is mentioned like once)

before you read (!!!): This one-shot is part of the writing event, Cupid’s Arrow!! You can find the masterlist as my pinned post on my blog :) If you’re interested in more Valentine’s Day themed works, please make sure to check it out!!

SUPPORT YOUR CONTENT CREATORS! REBLOG! <3

You should’ve known that falling in love with Oikawa was a clear mistake. It was written in harsh bold letters, a dreadful red that was anything but forgettable. Before becoming your lover, he was your friend. And you should’ve kept it at that.

But then again, you weren’t the quickest at sensing danger; from pulling your hand away from the roaring flames. You lingered, and waited, didn’t move until you felt the scorching heat of the fire on your delicate skin until you were burnt, the pain spreading throughout your body, like venom seeping into your veins.

You were his friend for years. You should’ve known how committed he was to volleyball, what extent he’d go for the sport. He poured his entire life, sweat, tears, and blood into it. Volleyball was his priority; but so were you. Or at least, that’s what you tried to tell yourself.

But as volleyball began to consume his life, spreading like a wildfire throughout his mind, the Oikawa you knew began to change.

The beautiful and mesmerizing roses that adorned his soul began to rot and fall until all that was left were dozens of thorns, deadly and painful. Leaving you to cry over rotten petals. He would spend less and less time with you, postponing dates and forgetting important events. And suddenly, you weren’t a priority in his life anymore.

Left you tugging at the other side of the rope, tugging with all your strength and willpower, only for him to drop the other end completely. Abandoned in static silence, with nothing but heartbreak and tears.

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Tooru was never good at keeping promises.

I’ll make it to tonight’s date, I promise, he told you with a brief kiss before heading out.

He didn’t make it. Left you sitting alone in a fancy restaurant, dressed up because you wanted to impress him tonight, only for him to never show up. You lost the count of how many times you checked your phone’s clock that night, or how many times you called or sent a message. They all went unanswered.

‘’Where were you?’’ you uttered once the lights flickered on. Sitting in the living room in the dark, you raised an eyebrow when the door swung open. His parents had been out for the weekend, and you had already informed yours that you would spend the night at your boyfriend’s.

Oikawa jumped, before giving you a nervous smile. You quickly assessed his appearance, unsure how to feel. He was in his volleyball uniform, forehead slick with sweat, sporting some bruises on his legs and arms. You didn’t miss the way some of his fingers were taped together, or how his knuckles were stained with dried blood.

‘’You….’’ were at a loss of words. ‘’You ditched me for the tenth time just to...practice volleyball?’’ Your words were nothing but honest, and yet, they were harsh whips of poison on Oikawa’s wounds. He cringed slightly, before swallowing nervously.

‘’I’m sorry, baby,’’ he murmured, ‘’I was going to make it- I swear I was going to, but then I lost track of time and well…’’

‘’This happened.’’ You finished the sentence for him, crossing your arms over your chest in disapproval.

He sighed, lowering his gaze to the floor. ‘’I’m sorry.’’

Eyeing his bloody knuckles, you frowned. An exasperated sigh left your lips. With a gentle tug on his upper arm, you took him to the bathroom. He watched you with a questioning look on his face but remained silent.

‘’Your knuckles,’’ you explained. ‘’We need to get them patched up.’’ His eyes softened.

‘’No, it’s okay,-’’ he held out his hands in protest. ‘’I’m fine. Besides, I should be making it up to you, not like this. Don’t fuss over me, let me take care of you.’’ The determination was clear and loud in his words. A sad smile hung on his lips.

Pursing your lips before breathing deeply, you insisted on him sitting on the toilet. He sat down with a reluctant frown, eyes following your movements.

‘’You can make it up to me,’’ you agreed. ‘’But after I patch you up, m’kay?’’

‘’Okay,’’ he hummed in agreement. Within a few minutes, you pulled out a medical kit and began to gently dab at his knuckles, kneeling between his open legs.

The night was quiet, almost gentle, after your small argument. Oikawa merely hummed a song you couldn’t recognize while you mended his hands. After spending a few minutes in silence and being almost done cleaning his wounds, you felt Oikawa’s lips press a kiss on the top of your head. You raised your head, meeting his warm smile and soft eyes.

‘’Thank you,’’ he murmured. ‘’I know I haven’t been paying enough attention to you… and I’m sorry about that. You don’t deserve that. I’ll make it up to you, I promise.’’ his hand settled beneath your chin, slowly pulling you closer until your lips met.

His warm breath fanned over your lips, every stroke of movement fueling your heart with such intense fondness and familiarity that only Oikawa possessed. His hands cupped the back of your head, fingers rubbing at the base of your neck, while your own crawled and wrapped around his neck, pulling him closer. Lips kept moving, tugging and dancing, until the two of you ran out of breath, slowly breaking apart with heaving chests. His forehead leaned against yours gently.

‘’I love you,’’ he murmured while rubbing his thumb over your lips. With a content smile, you wrapped your fingers around his thumb, squeezing it tightly.

‘’I love you more, Tooru.’’ And you meant it.

His lips returned to yours, this time attacking with much more fervor and neediness. Within a few seconds, he had your legs locked around his waist, holding you in the air as he sought towards your bedroom.

And for a few moments, in those moments where your lips couldn’t bear to leave him, when all clothes left your bodies and nothing but soft moans and loving whispers were said, you allowed yourself to forget. Forget all the broken promises, all the disappointments. Forget all the thorns that had stemmed in your relationship, inevitably hurting both of you. Oikawa was in your arms, he was with you, and that was all that mattered.

You could deal with the ugly thorns later.

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He first asked you out on Valentine’s Day. Now that you look back at it, your heart squeezes at the memory. You loved Oikawa with everything you had. He hadn’t rearranged his priorities yet- volleyball was a part of his life, but had yet to overtake all of it.

It was a hot, sizzling summer. The two of you were nearly done with secondary school and were soon on the way to high school. Specifically, Aoba Johsai. The high school of Oikawa’s dreams. As loyal best friends, you decided to follow him, to support his dreams- and the school also offered a handsome looking program of a career you were highly interested in pursuing. It all worked out.

Today’s holiday loomed over you like a dark and suffocating cloud. After witnessing Oikawa politely reject several girls- while hopelessly pining after him, it was safe to say your mood wasn’t the best. But he was quick to notice, and since the two of you had no romantic dates for the holiday, decided to go to the local carnival as friends. Just like old times, as best friends and nothing else. Everything troublesome shoved to the side, just to cheer each other up.

‘’Y/N-chan!’’ He called out to you, waving and sending a wide smile. You grinned in response, quickly walking away from the junior high’s building, and racing towards the entrance gate, where Oikawa stood, leaning against the gates.

‘’Took you long enough,’’ he said teasingly. ‘’Now c’mon, let’s go,’’ without hesitation, he wrapped his arm around your shoulders, the close proximity leaving you to walk along with him with burning cheeks. Not that he noticed, his eyes were on the carnival that was a few minutes away from the school.

‘’I didn’t take that long!’’ You protested, shaking your head. ‘’My teacher was holding us back because we didn’t answer the last question he gave us,’’ you pouted, and the boy laughed loudly. His hand squeezed your shoulder, and your heart thumped loudly at this. You wondered if he could hear it, beating too fast for its own good, desperate to leap out and land in his hands. Wanting to be his.

To your sides, you heard some of your classmates giggle, and felt dozens of eyes on your hands. Despite what everyone in your school thought, Oikawa and you weren’t dating. And as much as you’d like to, that wasn't your reality.

The two of you simply were affectionate and close with each other, having known each other since the fourth year of elementary, the two of you grew up like a pair of troublesome siblings. But you didn’t see Oikawa that way- no, your heart yearned for him. But anytime your hopes got up, they would immediately be crushed to the ground.

He saw you as a sister, you were sure of it. Heard him talk to Iwazumi, about how you meant so much to him, but as a friend. Nothing less and nothing more.

It didn’t help that the boy was gorgeous. One of the downsides of being his best friend for years was constantly being approached by shy, giggling girls who asked if you’re his girlfriend- or asking you to deliver him a love letter, bowing their heads before you, eagerly holding out a cute pink envelope.

‘’Hurry up!’’ Oikawa’s eager voice pulled you out of your thoughts. ‘’I can see the yatai stalls from here, let’s go!’’ He dropped your hand and began to jog towards the food stands, and you laughed briefly, before racing after him. The carnival had set up on the local but wide park, with fields of grass stretching ahead, trees, rocks and flowers littering the ground.

‘’Last one pays for the food!’’ You said, shooting him a grin as you raced ahead of him. Heard him gasp loudly behind you, before picking up his pace and racing like never before, leaving you in the dust. You stopped for a moment and laughed at his speed, recollecting your breath as you bent over your knees.

When you raised your head, you chuckled at the sight of Oikawa standing eagerly at a yakitori stand, quickly returning to you, holding two yakitori skewers. The sight of the roasted chicken, seasoned with tare sauce made your mouth water. In a matter of seconds, you ran up to your friend, quickly grabbing one of the yakitori.

‘’Hey!’’ He protested, but you saw the humor in his eyes. You smiled innocently, biting into the chicken.

‘’Thank you for paying, Tooru, even though I lost.’’ he shrugged nonchalantly, throwing an arm over your shoulders, the two of you walking away from the food stand. You blended in with the crowd of people, surrounded by food stands, kids running past you and the carnival’s rides echoing in the distance.

‘’Don’t sweat it. I’ll be your date for today, so I have to be a gentleman, don’t I?’’ He said with a sleazy smile, and you snorted, unamused.

‘’Whatever you say, crappykawa,’’ you crooned and grinned when he gasped, looking genuinely offended.

‘’Who taught you that-?! Was it Iwa-chan?’’ He pouted. He stopped in his tracks, crossing his arms over his chest, looking away from you with a dramatic sigh.

‘’I can’t believe you call me that too,’’ he grumbled, left shoe tapping against the ground. You fought back the urge to snort and giggle at the same time and instead, watched the boy carry out his dramatic antics with a small smile.

‘’I’m heartbroken! Truly, I can expect this type of behavior from Iwa-chan, but you-,’’ he pointed his finger at you, emphasizing his point. You let out a stifled giggle. ‘’-I expected better from you, Y/N-chan.’’

With a thoughtful hum, you tapped your finger on your chin, before smiling. ‘’What can I say, Tooru? Iwaizumi has given me some great names for you,’’ with a giggle, you patted his shoulder. ‘’And they really suit you…’’ slowly tensing your body, preparing to race off. ‘’...Shittykawa!’’ You broke into a run, giggling and looking back, watching as Oikawa’s eyes widened before he raced after you.

‘’Hey! Get back here! I’m not done with you yet!’’ You giggled, ignoring the few stares of the other people in the carnival, racing past food stands, without any particular destination, just determined to outrun Oikawa. And by the way you heard footsteps thudding on the floor closely behind you, he was getting closer. So you sped up, forcing your legs to work at a faster pace. The crowd began to disperse the more you ran, leaving behind food stalls and entering a rather empty area of the carnival, nothing but trees and grass in your surroundings, and a few rides, but they were at a considerable distance.

With a loud squeal, you were tackled onto the soft grass, giggling as Oikawa hovered above you, a smug grin on his face.

‘’Oooh,’’ you cooed. ‘’You caught me, crappykawa!’’ Your laugh grew louder as he groaned in annoyance, dropping his body on top of yours. You let out a loud oomph! as he continued to whine into your shoulder.

‘’Tooru,’’ you complained. ‘’You’re too heavy, get off!’’ With a slightly maniacal laugh, the boy pulled himself up, offering you his hand. You swallowed, and instead rejected his hand and got up on your feet. You missed the flash of hurt in his eyes, and smiled at him awkwardly as you patted your clothes.

‘’Well then,’’ he looked at you with a smile that made your heart skip a beat. ‘’Let’s have some fun now, shall we?’’

The two of you had raced towards every ride possible, screaming your lungs out together, usually leaving the rides with loud giggles and satisfied smiles. Every now and then, your hand would brush against Oikawa’s, and you would meet his gaze. Immediately, you would spring back, face burning. The boy would react similarly, his face flushing as he awkwardly scratched the back of his head.

Soon enough, the bright sky began to slightly darken, and the sun began to set. Touches of warm orange and hints of purple blended with the baby blue, clouds moving positions, opening a path for the sun.

After the both of you stuffed yourselves with so much food you nearly puked, Tooru pulled you towards the Ferris Wheel. The tall ride was perfect for the occasion; with the sun setting, and the air warm but soothing, it would be quite the sight and experience.

With an excited smile, you sat in one of the compartments with Oikawa, sitting across each other. Your knees brushed against each other, and you watched as your friend’s head bobbed as he swallowed visibly.

Once the two of you were seated, the ride quickly began to move. Gears shifted and the somewhat old infrastructure groaned, which was slightly concerning, but you quickly forgot about it when Oikawa began to talk.

‘’So,’’ he started, ‘’How did you enjoy Valentine’s Day with me?’’ The brown-haired boy gave you a crooked smile, and you gave him a smile of your own.

‘’It was fun. Thanks for spending the day with me Tooru, even if you had the choice to go with one of your fangirls.’’ He laughed at this.

‘’I wouldn’t want to spend the day with anyone else but you, Y/N.’’ Your heart somersaulted, and Oikawa wouldn’t stop staring at you.

‘’You don’t mean that,’’ the words left your lips before you could stop them. At this, Oikawa frowned and leaned closer to you. Your mouth felt dry. Trying to back away, you leaned backward, only to quickly meet the metallic wall of the compartment.

‘’What do you mean?’’ Within a few seconds, the atmosphere shifted. Gone was the playful but serene atmosphere, and was quickly replaced by a tense and stuffy environment.

You swallowed nervously and looked away, deciding to gaze at the scenery at your left side. Trees swayed beneath you, the carnival full to the brim with people, running, walking, and screaming. The sun gently enveloped you the higher the Ferris Wheel took you, but you didn’t mind.

‘’You’re my best friend, Y/N. What do you mean I wouldn’t want to spend today with you?’’

You could sense confrontation, and it was the last thing you wanted to deal with. Wanted to hop off right away and run away from it. As far as you were concerned, confessing to Oikawa Tooru wasn’t in your agenda anytime soon.

And yet, here you were. Wetting your lips before letting out a shaky sigh, slowly turning around to meet the boy’s gaze.

‘’That’s the problem,’’ you said in a low voice. ‘’To you, I’m nothing but your best friend. But to me, Tooru, you’re so much more than that. I...I like you, a lot.’’

He was silent for a few heartbeats. That was enough for you to feel rejected, to feel your chest tighten painfully, feeling a wave of painful emotions approach you.

‘’I know you don’t feel the same way,’’ you quickly interjected. ‘’But since you want to know, that’s what I meant.’’

The brown-haired boy let out a soft chuckle, and your eyes quickly snapped to his. He was watching you with a confused, but now relieved and soft expression.

‘’And who told you that?’’ Shifting in his seat, you swallowed as Oikawa got closer, his nose nearly brushing against yours.

‘’Told me what?’’ You repeated in an impossibly small voice, feeling your face grow warmer as the distance between your best friend and you decreased until it was nearly nonexistent.

‘’That I don’t return your feelings,’’ his lips slightly parted, and you watched them intently, swallowing when you watched the boy swipe his tongue over them. Couldn’t keep your eyes off the pretty, pink, and plump lips, especially when they were so close to you.

So close that if you merely moved forward in one swift movement, they’d be against yours. Just like forbidden fruit, Tooru Oikawa was so close in your reach, yet so far-so unattainable.

Being so focused on his lips, your breath hitched when you finally registered his words. You met his eyes, searching for any lies or doubt in them. You found none. Felt your heart thump loudly when you saw nothing but honesty.

‘’Wait…’’ your jaw almost dropped to the ground. ‘’What?’’

Instead of replying verbally, you gasped as Oikawa suddenly surged forward, and his lips were on yours. But then you froze, overwhelmed and confused. You had never kissed someone before- what were you supposed to do? At your sudden hesitance, your best friend pulled away. He watched the hint of fear and uncertainty in your expression and felt his heart drop to his stomach.

‘’I’m sorry,’’ he quickly said. ‘’Did you not want me to-’’ This time, you were the one surging forward, silencing him with your warm lips.

Both of you were inexperienced and were moving slowly and carefully. And yet, that didn’t stop it from feeling so sweet and warm. Oikawa felt you smile against his lips, your arms sliding to wrap around his neck, pulling him closer.

‘’This means you want to be my girlfriend, right?’’’ The boy said between kisses, and you pulled away to giggle.

‘’Yes, Tooru, I want to be your girlfriend,’’ now nearly seated in his lap, you sent him a shy smile.

‘’Good…’’ he mumbled. For once, the usually confident and flirty boy was a mess. Pink cheeks

and slightly ruffled hair, he could barely meet your gaze. ‘’Because I really want to be your boyfriend.’’

➴➵➶➴➵➶➴➵➶➴➵➶➴➵➶

Your eyes were burning, tired from being used all day. Class after class, endless notes to write resulted in you being exhausted. But that didn’t stop you from being excited. After the incident from a few days ago, in which Tooru stood you up and you ended up mending his hands, he took the initiative and said that you should have a home date together. It made your heart warm. Because for once, it felt like you weren’t the only one putting effort into this relationship. If he was willing to plan and set the date for you, then that was a good thing, right? There was still hope for the two of you.

Except that as soon as your hopes got up, they were crushed. Since Oikawa was going to handle the date, he asked you to stay away from his house after school, until five o’clock, so he could get things ready for you.

So you spent a few hours at your house, doing some homework before getting ready for the date. To say you were excited was an understatement. Finally, after so many canceled dates, you would be able to spend some alone time with your boyfriend. Just Oikawa and you, and nothing else in between.

And true to your word, you arrived at Oikawa’s house a few minutes past five o’clock, wearing an outfit that made you feel confident and pretty. You rang the doorbell and waited. And waited. Minutes passed by, and no one opened the door. Confused, you furrowed your eyebrows, deciding to knock instead. Again, no response.

With an exasperated sigh, you peeked through the windows, stomach twisting when you noticed the lights were off. No one was home.

Fumbling with your fingers, you quickly fished out your phone from your bag and dialed Oikawa. The phone continued to ring, and your boyfriend wasn’t picking up. After the sixth ring, you were sent to voicemail.

‘’Heyo! This is Oikawa. Unfortunately, I’m not available right now, so please leave a message.’’

He had to be kidding. You quickly ended the call, feeling overwhelmingly conflicted. You weren’t sad. You didn’t want to cry. How many dates had he stood you up? The amount was genuinely laughable at this point.

‘’Would it kill him to make an effort?’’ You muttered harshly as you decided to sit on the house’s doorstep, biting the inside of the cheek.

You spent an hour or two sitting outside the house. Every now and then, a car would drive past the lone street. The trees swayed in the distance and the wind howled in your ears. It was already dark, and you could spot some bright stars in the sky.

And by the time Oikawa showed up, you were so close to losing it. It took much of your restraint to not cry, sadness and fury were fighting over control over you, transforming into a painful combination.

‘’Glad you decided to show up,’’ you said quietly. You raked your eyes over Oikawa’s appearance. He was in his volleyball uniform, school backpack slung over his back, carrying in one hand two bags of groceries, and in the other one, his school uniform.

He met your gaze but remained silent. Maybe he was feeling guilty and didn’t know what to say. But you were far past thinking about that.

‘’Do you remember what you said to me on Valentine’s Day?’’ You met his gaze, tears pricking from your ears. Slowly, he shook his head.

‘’You said you really wanted to be my boyfriend,’’ you laughed, harshly wiping away at your tears. ‘’Well, it sure doesn’t feel like it.’’

‘’I’m…’’ he croaked, and you took notice of how his eyes began to water. ‘’I’m sorry.’’ You merely smiled at his apology.

‘’So, what was it this time? Did Iwa-chan want to practice his spikes over time? Had problems with the first-years? Go ahead Oikawa, tell me what’s your excuse this time.’’ He recoiled at your use of his last name. You always called him Tooru, sometimes shittykawa or crappykawa, but never just his last name, Oikawa.

‘’I was practicing my serves,’’ he murmured. ‘’They need to be better. But- I wasn’t planning on standing you up, I swear,’’ he held up the plastic bags in his right hand. ‘’I just came back from the store, I got the ingredients to cook you dinner...’’

‘’This is pathetic,’’ you quickly stood up, shaking your head. ‘’I can’t take this anymore!’’ You cried out. Tooru reached towards you, but you flinched away.

‘’No,’’ you whispered. ‘’Don’t touch me. I’ve had enough, Oikawa. I know volleyball is your passion. I know, okay!? I’ve been to all your matches. Cheered for you, comforted you when you’d lost your match. You’re amazing,’’ you let out a dry laugh.

‘’And that’s the problem. I...I don’t fit in your life. I don’t think I ever did,’’ you looked up at him with a shaky smile, but watery eyes and tear-stained cheeks.

‘’Don’t say that.’’ His voice was clogged with emotion. He dropped all his bags, and pulled you into his arms, even if you struggled. ‘’Don’t say that, please. You fit in my life. You’re my girlfriend, I love you, I need you.’’

With a gentle push, you slipped out of the setter’s arms. For once, he didn’t stop you. Only watched you with teary eyes as his lower lip wobbled.

‘’I need you too, Tooru.’’ You said with a small smile. ‘’You have all of me, and I only have parts of you. And I’m sorry, I really am.’’

‘’But I can’t love you like this. I can’t love you knowing that volleyball will always be first, that I’ll only get slivers of your time, and the sport will have your full and undivided attention. You’re going to be a superstar, baby,’’ you hiccuped. ‘’And I’m only going to drag you down.’’

‘’No,’’ he shook his head. ‘’No, no, no.’’ In a few steps, he pulled you into his chest, and you cried into his shirt. His head settled on top of yours, hands desperately holding your face.

‘’I’ll be better, I promise. I’ll-I’ll make more time for you, and-and I’ll make a schedule! We’ll have more dates, and I will be at your side. I...I promise.’’ His voice was shaky and you watched his tears along with yours, stain his shirt.

‘’Don’t make promises you won’t keep, Tooru.’’ You pressed a kiss on his cheek. ‘’Didn’t your mom teach you that?’’ You chuckled softly.

‘’Please…’’ he cried into your hair. ‘’I love you. Don’t leave me.’’

‘’I have to.’’ You slowly removed his arms from your body. ‘’You know that.’’

He sniffled in response. You stepped closer to him until your nose was brushing against his. Tooru quickly understood, and his lips crashed into yours with great fervor, moving desperately, hungrily. You were just as eager to reply, and subconsciously, both of you knew why. This was your way of saying goodbye.

➴➵➶➴➵➶➴➵➶➴➵➶➴➵➶

You were second best, and would always be second best. You weren’t enough for him, you never would be. His heart was set on volleyball, and it had always been.

How could you ever think he could love you? When you met, he had already given his heart away to the sport. And yet, he made space for you. Gave you small fragments that you thought were his everything; but were nothing but measly pieces, pieces you desperately hung to.

Your relationship with Tooru Oikawa was nothing but an unsteady foundation, the product of lovesick pre-teenagers, naive and hopeful as ever. Created for comfort, for tranquility, and most important of all, created with hope. But now? Now that all the veils have been revealed, when all truths have been spoken, and when there is nothing left to say, it’s bittersweet.

Bittersweet to the point you can’t bear thinking about it. It makes your stomach queasy, makes your heart ache, with tears bubbling up in your eyes. And at the same time, it fills you with such serenity and nostalgia, it makes you forget the pain and replaces it with fondness.

But only for a moment. And a moment is not enough.

You still loved him, and he still loved you. Your paths that had once been tightly intertwined as children, slowly began to untangle throughout the years, choosing very, very different paths. Paths that couldn’t be tied together, too difficult, too painful, to remain as one.

They only met briefly, intertwined tightly, but just as fast as they intertwined, they quickly untangled. Oikawa Tooru was a person who was meant to reach the stars, to shine brightly above all. And what were you compared to him? You were your own person. But your path was far different from his. And no matter how hard you tried, Oikawa Tooru was not your path.

Fate was cruel. It ripped you out of your fantasy and reminded you of how Oikawa would always choose volleyball first. You would never be his first choice. Made you realize that once the rose-tinted glasses were off, when everything was stripped naked and the bare truth laid before you, your paths were never meant to stay together.

The last sentence fully sinks into your mind as you shift in your seat. The cheering and roaring of excitement, loud screaming, and claps of encouragement echoing in the gymnasium. Watching Oikawa in the court feels like playing with poison; it hurts, hurts so much, remembering that you’ll always be his second option, and right now, you’re witnessing him shine brightly. Shining in the field of volleyball players, coaxing intimidation and awe into others. He was in his territory, ruling over all like a Great King. Without you.

It’s one of Oikawa’s best performances. His spikes are brutal as always, leaving a deafening silence before the audience uproars and cheers. His skills are polished, and all of Seijoh is hungry for victory. Before you know it, the match ends and Seijoh has won. You watch as they all shout in glory, hugging each other fiercely.

Usually, by now, you’d be racing down towards the court, jumping into Oikawa’s arms, smothering him in kisses. The thought pulls at your heartstrings, making you swallow a lump in your throat. The setter seems to remember as well, as his gaze meets yours, staring and lingering, but not moving.

You want to go back to him. Race back into his arms, pull him into a desperate kiss, try to convey all your desires into the flurry of kisses, and have him laugh and slowly pull away with swollen lips.

But you can’t. Not again.

This is for the best, you tell yourself as Oikawa and his team shake hands with the other team, and you don’t surge forward. You don’t cry out his name, watch as his eyes widen as you proclaim your love for him once again, just like out of a romantic drama. You don’t, and instead, you watch as he shakes hands firmly, a brief light of satisfaction in his eyes, before walking away from the opposing team. It’s for the best.

It’s okay; you don’t stop him from exiting the court. Your heart stutters as he suddenly stops, and glances at you. His lips part open, and even from this distance, and you can see the mix of emotions flashing in his eyes.

It’s for the best; you turn on your back and quickly exit the seating, as squeals and whoops of excitement continue to echo in the stadium.

This is for the best, you tell yourself. Then why does it hurt so much?

➴➵➶➴➵➶➴➵➶➴➵➶➴➵➶

His lungs are burning.

There’s a painful ache in his thighs, especially in his knee, the type of pain that probably shouldn’t be overlooked, but he can’t find it himself to stop. The moment he caught sight of your face, of your tired and weary eyes, he froze. Thank god he didn’t notice you until the match was over- if he had seen you sooner, he might've messed up a serve, and lost the match.

Stop it, he curses himself. This is why you lost her. Stop thinking about volleyball, and think about her first.

Once the referee blew the whistle, once he had shaken hands with the opposing team, once he saw you, he ran. Dropped everything and raced outside when he saw you retreat from the gymnasium, forced himself to run even though his body was screaming, forced himself to run towards your quickly disappearing figure.

He shouted. Shouted your name, tears nearly sprouting from his eyes, shouted until his throat was raw. But you didn’t turn around. Not once. You kept running, running further and further away from him. He didn’t blame you, but that didn’t mean he wanted it to happen.

When he reaches the end of the street, he barely notices it was a dead end. His heart shatters and the voices in his head scream the loudest they ever have. You’re nowhere in sight.

A dead-end, he thinks bitterly. Of course, he had to reach a dead end.

‘’Y/N…’’ he calls out one more time. His voice is ragged and his throat is burning, but he still calls out for you. But you never respond. You don’t step out of a corner of darkness or appear behind him, quickly racing towards him and embracing him in your oh so loving arms. Instead, Oikawa’s only response is silence. Deafening silence, so thick and tense he finds himself letting out a loud sob, dropping onto his knees, hands tugging at his hair harshly.

He’s selfish. Oikawa knows this very well, and yet, he still strung you along. Allowed you into his heart, even when he knew that in a few years, once he had graduated high school, he would be off, racing after his dreams. But the moment he first touched your lips, he stopped caring. When he witnessed your smile, all he could think about was seeing it again. Didn’t care about the implications, the pain his selfishness would bring. All he wanted was volleyball, and you. Was that too much to ask for? He loves you.

Oikawa’s always been told that as the setter of Seijoh, he brings out the best in his players. Knows how to play their cards to the fullest. And even outside the court, he was the same. Always coaxing smiles and giggles out of people. Making people feel at ease around him.

Then why... did he only ever bring out the worst in you?

a/n: okay so... this was a monster to write HAHAHAH the first time, i deleted about 2-3K ;> because i didn’t like the direction the one-shot was going towards. but finally, it is complete ✨ and this is my first time writing full blown angst + oikawa, so please let me know how it was!! admittedly, this isn’t one of my best works :’D but i hope y’all enjoyed! feedback is greatly appreciated :3

if you enjoyed, PLEASE REBLOG! LIKE AND/OR COMMENT!

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sunshine-stars · 3 years

Text

I probably won’t end up writing this but I’m having so much fun with the jatp six of crows au so:

SPOILERS FOR SIX OF CROWS AND CROOKED KINGDOM

Reggie is Nina

They’re both bi

Love food so much

Wear red

I wanna see him with heart render powers but hate having to use them cuz his parents always fought and used them against each other ouch

I can’t describe it but it just FITS

Dates Matthias (WHO WONT DIE IN THIS CUZ I LOVE HIM)

Willie is Jesper

Adhd

I would love to see him with Jesper’s cocky attitude

The guns omg

Gay

I can see him having trouble with gambling cuz he always think that this time he’ll get it right

(OMG THERES A MUSIC VIDEO ON YOUTUBE WHERE THAT LINE IS ABOUT JESPER AND ITS AMAZING HERE)

Suppressing his powers - prolly doesn’t realize he’s a powerful ghost in jatp and doesn’t realize he’s a Fabrikator

And it just fits that his mom died when he was young and he has a dad he always feel like he’s disappointing ouch

Hopelessly in love with Wylan

Alex is Wylan

Blonde lol

Gay

Idk if he’ll have dyslexia simply cuz I don’t and I don’t want to represent it wrong so I’ll either not include it or do tons of research about it

Realistically I could write him with a stutter instead cuz I have one but idk

Dad doesn’t accept him because he’s gay and maybe dyslexia and treats him like he’s stupid and worthless ouch

It just kinda seems like Alex would’ve had a rich snobby family

I project onto both of these characters

Dating Jesper

Or wait maybe Alex should be Matthias idk I’m just brainstorming rn

Ofc he’d still have anxiety and he’d just make a lot more sarcastic comments than does in the books

THE BANTER BETWEEN HIM AND WILLIE

Julie is Inej

BADASS SPY JULIE OMG

Also tell me Inej isn’t a lil bit gay cuz her and Nina obviously flirted in the books

And Julie’s bi so it fits

She seems like she’d be the most religious out of all of them

Cuz cross and stuff and just imagine Julie praying to the saints after her mother died and just ouch

After losing her mom she walked away to the next town and got kidnapped and ouch

But in this they find her in Fijerda and are just so amazing

Imagine her saying “I will have you without armour, or I won’t have you at all” to Luke

Dates Luke

Luke is Kaz

Ik this seems weird but hear me out

Ran away with older brother cuz parents didn’t accept his love for music and other reasons

Why am I making everyone run away in this omg oh well

Then older brother dies ouch

So Luke completely turns to music and closes himself to get by and joins the Dregs and ends up at the top

But he’s less closed off and scary as Kaz cuz I just can’t see that but still a bit less Luke like

I feel like Luke would actually be scary smart but the impulsiveness and puppy dog ness just gets in the way so people don’t realize that

Dates Kaz

Bobby is Matthias

Gremlin done with your shit energy

I can see him with backwards ideals in Fijerda and coming to Kerch and just being like what everything I learned is wrong???

DOESNT DIE IN THIS

I don’t have a lot of strong reasons for this but I can feel it

Dates Nina

Carrie

Matthias’ sister

Goes to Kerch with him

Same everything I learned is wrong???? But has a harder time accepting it

Insecurities

Enemies to lovers Flarrie

Flynn

Went on a walk with Julie and got captured with her ouch

But they stayed together the whole time

Just awesome dynamic with Julie

Enemies to lovers Flarrie

Anddddd more plot stuff

It’d be more lighthearted than six of crows but more heavy than jatp

Ya know how the original crew was Kaz Inej and Jesper

Instead it’ll be Kaz/Luke, Wylan/Alex, Nina/Reggie, Matthias/Bobby, and some Carrie

Kaz is the same

Wylan/Alex runs away/gets kicked out a lot sooner and Kaz recruits him sooner

Nina/Reggie is the same but a bit more with them than at the start of six of crows

Matthias/Bobby and Carrie get freed by Kaz a lot sooner

Matthias/Bobby and Nina/Reggie HATE each other and can’t stand to be around each other but eventually fall in love

Matthias/Bobby is constantly annoyed with all of them but needs them to survive but secretly is fond of them

Carrie joins in sometimes

Inej/Julie and Flynn come in a lot later and Kaz/Luke saves them before they go to the brothel

Jesper/Willie goes to Kerch a bit later and Wylan/Alex recruits him instead of the other way around

They obviously do the heist

And they have a lil band

ALEX/WYLAN PLAYS DRUMS AND FLUTE

Wow I got carried away with this

Any feedback is really appreciated!!!! Feel free to make suggestions or whatever!!!

#jatp #julie and the phantoms #six of crows #soc #fanfic idea

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erensnubs · 3 years

Text

𝑳𝒂𝒖𝒓𝒊𝒆 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝑱𝒐

Hanamaki Takihiro x GN! Reader

Based off of the Laurie and Jo Scene in Little Women

Summary: Sometimes first loves never work out

Content: Angst, pure angst

From pirate ships, to being monarchs and warriors of old, you and Hanamaki Takahiro, were best friends.

He was the little boy who moved in next door, snot running down his nose, hands stained with dirt as he offered you a piece offering of roly polies and leaves.

You were the little kid who rolled around in the mud and terrorized the other kids by throwing sticks at them.

Needless to say you immediately became best friends. And menaces to your parents, the neighborhood kids and society in general.

You were together from the young ages of kindergarten, you were there to witness Hanamaki's awkward stage of puberty. You were there to witness him making other friends than you and lovers.

He was there when he saw you make other friends than him, dating a lot of people. He was there when you were scared of going to middle school, was there when you had anxiety over grades.

You were there for each other all the time, ups and downs, triumphs and trials.

So it was natural, that Hanamaki fell, completely and hopelessly;

In love with you.

You're running in the grass, rolling around with Hanamaki laughing your asses off. You guys have just graduated highschool and the two of you, being the dumb bitches you are decide to skip the family party to celebrate your accomplishments.

“We’re adults now!” You yell, half skipping down the hill and eventually trip.

You pick yourself up and start screaming.

“I’M FREE FROM THIS GOD FORSAKEN TOWN! WE’RE FREE!”

Hanamaki laughs, “Yeah says the one who barely passed history.”

He grabs you by the arm and drags you through the flowers of the field and sets you down, all the while you giggle deliriously.

Usually Hanamaki would be laughing along, making stupid jokes about your laugh.

But he doesn’t.

And it scares you.

Before you even open your mouth to say anything, Hanamaki plops down beside you and thoughtfully asks,

“What are we going to do, [Name]? After here?”

The question sounded serious not like those ones where he asked you if he looked sexy for prom or if his crocs match the vibe of the weather that day.

You paused to take in the question.

“Well... I can’t really answer that Hiro Out of our whole friend group we’ve always been the floaters. The ones that never really know what we’re doing...”

Hanamaki turns his head around, baby hairs sticking onto his skin from the sweat of running. His eyes are looking at you, no they’re looking through you.

He breathes out a yes, like he’s been holding something from you. A secret he didn’t want to tell.

You turn away abruptly hoping he doesn’t see your slight change of attitude.

“Iwaizumi’s going to America, Mattsun is getting ready for college, and you know Oikawa is going over to Brazil to pursue volleyball.”

“I honestly don’t know Hiro. I get that we can’t be kids who run around more and throw dirt at each other,” you say laughing softly.

Hanamaki scoffs, “But you wish it was like that huh?”

You sit up and pick the grass from the ground and throw it randomly into the air.

“Of course! I still want to get a pirate ship and go and travel the world with you.”

Hanamaki raises his eyebrows, “And steal gold from random people?”

You smile cheekily, “Of course. Then we’ll build our chocolate empire, something that could rival Willy Wonka’s.”

Hanamaki stands up and puts his hand out to you.

You grab it, but why do you feel like the gesture is something much more than a friendly hand?

The two of you start walking, swinging your arms around as you joke about your chocolate factory, your pirate ships, the adventures you’re going to have.

The sun was setting, the long, green blades of grass turning yellow as you and Hanamaki run through them, creating scars and bumps on your skin.

You were going to miss highschool. You were going to miss groaning about exams and certain substitute teachers. Miss skipping classes with Mattsun and Makki to go get wasted with cheap alcohol.

You were going to miss Oikawa and his stupid smile and Iwaizumi and his stupid nicknames. You were going to miss crying with the 3rd years over lost volleyball games.

Hell, you were probably going to cry when Oikawa and Iwaizumi left to continue their lives. You might even cry when Mattsun goes to college even if he isn’t going overseas.

But at least you had Hanamaki. Your dearest friend. Though your relationship has gotten deeper and you were able to confide with each other, you were still the 2 children that fought other kids on the playground.

You could always, always rely on him. Because you never changed with each other.

“[Name]?”

You turn around and see Hanamaki. His eyes glowed with something.

And it was not of the setting sun.

“Yes?” You say, the sky turning darker as moments pass.

“I know we talk about us being adventurous and going with the flow... but I feel like we could do something more, you know?” he says it quietly, his thumb subconsciously rubbing yours.

You look up at him, “What do you mean? You just want to suddenly work a 9-5 job in a corporate company? We talked about this Hiro...”

He looks taken aback, “No no, that’s not what I meant [Name].”

Hanamaki gets quieter, “We could always be little kids, playing with swords and sticks. Together.”

You pause as Hanamaki looks up at your eyes. Together? You’ve always been together? Always.

Wait.

He couldn’t possibly mean.

You pull back from his grasp,

“No Hiro I can’t do that. Please no.”

You start walking away from him and he advances as he argues, trying to salvage something.

“[Name], no I love you and I have always loved you since we were little! I can’t imagine myself being with anyone else besides you!”

You walk faster and wrap your arms around yourself, “No, no, no. Hiro you’re being ridiculous.”

“Yes, YES!”

“No! We can’t!”

“[NAME]! COME BACK HERE LET ME SEE YOU!” Hanamaki says running towards you.

You spin around and stare at him, “We can’t work Hiro! I could never love you that way, and I would be lying, God I would be lying if I said that I did. Our whole life together we’re going to be pretending.”

He runs his fingers through his hair in frustration, “Why?! We were just talking about doing adventures together! Why is that any different than what I proposed!?”

You stomp your foot onto the ground, “Did you not just listen to me you dipshit? I could never love you romantically! Ever! I care for you, I worry for you but Hanamaki you are my friend. My closest friend. You are the one thing in my life that hasn’t changed so quickly and then you pull this shit?”

Hanamaki starts yelling now, “BUT I MAKE YOU HAPPY! AND YOU MAKE ME HAPPY! WE HAVE BEEN TOGETHER SIDE BY SIDE, FOR YEARS [NAME]! YEARS! I HAVE DONE EVERYTHING I COULD HAVE TO TELL YOU I LOVE YOU!”

You start shaking your head, “No, don’t say that.”

Hanamaki starts rambling, “You always tell me that words and actions are your love languages-

“Stop.”

“And I’ve been doing it, [Name]. I have. I have been there for you, anywhere and-and-”

“Takihiro stop.”

“And I can’t feel like this anymore. I can’t let you slip through my fingers and watch you run away from me like everyone else has-”

“TAKIHIRO STOP IT!”

The only things that you could hear were the sounds of your breathing and the crickets in the grass.

“Takihiro, you’re being a child. You’re being stupid and ridiculous. Do not let the fantasies of a boy ruin your future,” you say sternly, begging for your tears to not fall onto the ground.

“You say that, [Name], and then run from everything that requires commitment,” he says sharply.

“You’re a coward, [Name]. You’re hurting me.”

Hanamaki is stepped away from you know and he starts walking away.

“My life has no meaning anymore-”

You scoff, “Takihiro your love for me isn’t worth your life!”

Hanamaki walks away and his voice is racked with sobs. Oh god he seriously does love you.

Why?

“Takihiro come back here!”

You’re running towards him now, grabbing his arm but he pushes away.

“Takihiro think with your brain! Just because we can’t be together the way you want doesn’t mean we have to sever all ties!” You say breathlessly.

“I mean think about it, we could have never worked. You hate the fact I don’t eat your favorite ice cream, you constantly like to go out and I like staying home.”

“I don’t care-”

“I hate meeting your other family members because they look down on me, my family members have always been skeptical of you-”

“I don’t care about that-”

“And we would be miserable, Takihiro. Absolutely miserable with one another-”

“No we wouldn’t,” he says stopping and grabbing your arm. Your noses were touching as his thin lips tried to connect with yours.

You pull away.

“Admit it Makki. We are better off as friends, not lovers,” you say finally.

“I’m ugly and I don’t care about my appearance like your other lovers do. I’m brutally honest with you and sometimes you cry about my opinion and-”

“I love you [Name].”

“I’m lazy and have no real goal in life, I have no foundation no, no rock or something. I don’t have a drive, Hiro! You’re going to be stuck with someone who doesn’t care.”

“I love you.”

“And you’re going to find someone else, a nice person, who likes eating your ice cream and dresses up. Who has a clear goal in life and someone your family will love-”

“No one could ever replace you, [Name]-”

You throw your hands up in frustration, “You’re mixing platonic and romantic feelings together and turning it into some big thing!”

“No, I’m not.”

“Yes you are.”

Silence surpasses you again and Hanamaki starts walking away.

You spoke up, “But-”

He turns around again and looks at you with hope. Hope for something more.

“That I don’t think I’ll ever be with someone romantically, Makki. I’ve gone years without.”

Hanamaki scoffs and starts to laugh cruelly,

“I don’t believe that, [Name]. You’re going to find someone, and you’re going to fall hard.”

You sneer, “How do you know?”

“I just do, you’re impossible to not fall in love with. You’re the sunshine in my life.”

“Takihiro don’t say that, please.”

He looks back at you, “But you are! You are my world, my-”

“LEAVE ME! OH MY GOD LEAVE ME!” You yell at him and turn away.

This was the 1st time Hanamaki hears you with that voice.

"[Name]-"

"JUST GO PLEASE-"

"YOU WILL FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE [NAME]!”

You spit out your words, “OH REALLY YOU THINK I WILL? ME? THE PERSON WHO TURNED YOU DOWN?!”

“YES! YES [NAME],” Hanamaki says.

“You’re going to fall in love with someone and you’re perfect, care free life will turn upside down and they’re going to love you. And you’re going to be perfect with each other-”

“HANAMAKI-”

“And I will watch. I will watch you grow and love this person. I will watch it happen because I still love you and I don’t think I’ll love anyone else.”

“And I will watch you, I will watch you [Name], and- and,”

You couldn’t bear to see his tears fall from his eyes, so you turn away.

“I will imagine that it could have been me and you-”

“Hanamaki please-”

“I don’t know what to do with myself but I will still take care of you and I truly love you, forever and-”

“Hanamaki-”

“I won’t ever stop, [Name]. Ever,” he says softly as he tries to reach out for your hand.

You pull away, your voice breaking.

“Hanamaki, go. I don’t want to see you right now,” you say softly.

You don’t have to turn around to see him crumble. You can feel it.

Because your heart was crumbling too.

“I’ll go... get back safe, [Name],” he adds.

You don’t say anything back, and hear the slow movements in the grass as your best friend walked away from you.

Forever.

The sky is dark, the stars seemed ashamed at your argument, and they don’t shine like they used to from years before.

You stayed in the grass, silent tears on your face as you shielded yourself from the cold with your arms.

You wanted to go home, but home wasn’t a place

It was a person. And his name was Hanamaki Takihiro.

But home loved you, and you didn’t love it back the way they wanted.

More tears flowed from your eyes at the sudden thought emerged from your eyes.

You had no home anymore.

AN: Another random little oneshot I did for my boy Hanamaki! Please comment your thoughts or reblog and like! I need constructive critiscm loves so I know what I can write and appeal to!

Taglist: @saladskittles

#hanamaki x reader #hanamaki takahiro #hanamaki oneshot #hanamaki angst #haikyu angst #gn reader #haikyu oneshots #hanamaki scenarios #hurt/comfort #angst #hanamaki x gn reader #hanamaki x y/n #hanamaki x you #little women #laurie and jo #tina's fics⌨︎#tina's cafe menu☕︎

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jostenneil · 3 years

Note

idk why but whenever you mention misery romance I always laugh because I’m like that. Whenever I read a romance shojo manga I always look forward to the conflict and the different ways lovers hurt each other. as much as I like wholesome couples, I like things to be shaken up a bit. Do you have any favorite miserable romance pairs?

just going to do short summaries with these since i have quite a few

tesadora and perri / the lumatere chronicles / when they were kids he tried to drown her and she carved a permanent scar into his forehead bc their peoples were severely at odds with each other and there’s just. so much misery it’s so good “we’d do cruel things to each other” and every time i evaporate

eugenides and irene / the queen’s thief / enjoyment of this series rests entirely upon going into it unspoiled but here’s a banger quote “i have been living with your grief and your rage and your pain ever since. i don’t think - i don’t think i had felt anything for a long time before that, but those emotions at least were familiar to me”

narnie and jude / jellicoe road / what happens when your parents die in a car crash and then all that’s left is your brother and the three friends you make except over the years everyone leaves or dies and what’s left is just you and a boy who can’t forgive each other for surviving

marco and connie / gangsta. / sometimes love is leaving the mercenary life behind bc seeing a girl cry after you kill her parents rattles you to your core and you spend every waking day after resolving to do better and she’s got anger and hope enough to hold you to that standard, to “a terrible curse to carry”

sasuke and sakura / naruto / we’ve already been over this but i think het hero worship is sexy! love it when girls are hopelessly in love with traumatized boys who make them cry and they have to suck it up and keep moving forward all the while their heart is breaking

bruce and talia / dc / extension of the above! sometimes romance is you and the dashing, brooding hero who swoops in to save you on occasion but is too emotionally unreliable to follow through all the way, so you save yourself and shelter yourself within the walls of your own heart despite the yearning and aching and knowledge that he loves you eternally

arata and taichi / chihayafuru / when the new kid in town is poor and you make fun of his pants and push him into a puddle but then somehow get roped into this weird freaking card game he’s insanely good at and now all you want to do for the next six years is be good enough for him to look at you as an equal. “a boy who showed me his cowardly side” haunts me

kou and aoba / cross game / ah, the inevitable crash and fall into love with a boy whom your sister loved first, before she drowned in a river over the summer at the age of ten, and you said to yourself, i’m going to hate this boy forever, i’m going to hate him for taking away my time with my sister. and then you don’t. you don’t hate him even a little bit

nate and elena / uncharted / i know tlou is the more famous nd game but frankly idgaf bc no one can give me on-again-off-again trauma drama like these two do. the way she almost died so they got married and then he LEFT? and then they got married again and he decided to go on another suicidal treasure hunt that also nearly broke their marriage like this is coney island by taylor swift ft. the national but as a video game saga

kakashi and obito / naruto / sorry to bring another naruto ship into this list but i simply feel like people die so often on the hill of narusasu when they don’t even come close to these two. like obito gave kakashi his freaking eye as he was dying and then kakashi killed the love of his life, and obito still had enough grace to go for the kill with minato first instead

the mcs’ polycule / wolf’s rain / there’s just a perfect element of misery romance in being a wolf who honors your friends by snapping their necks when they’re on the verge of death and want to go out of the world without suffering for long. a tragic tenderness if you will

suou and munakata / k project / i will be honest i hardly even remember the plot of this anymore it’s been like a decade since i watched it but you know when you’re constantly fighting each other to the death and one of you dies in the other’s arms, that’s always great misery romance. also spoilers ig lol now you gotta figure out which one dies :)

tsumugu and chisaki / a lull in the sea / when all of your friends and family are frozen underwater bc of the whims of a sea god! and you are the only one left on the surface! and a boy and his family take you in and you fall for him all the while but your heart resists and resists bc there’s a boy whom you love still left under the sea, not growing up while you do! and the boy on the surface loves you and waits for you anyway! GOD

kurogane and fai / clamp / every other clamp series has tragic gays but imo they are the best like there’s just so many blood pacts made between these two. it’s always a unique brand of misery romance when you give away parts of yourself to ensure another person’s survival and all they can do for a while is loathe you for it, bc they don’t believe themselves worthy of surviving

my head kinda hurts now but this is like a starter pack ig. maybe one day i can come up with more gjfkldhlgf

#mine:recs #asks

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it-begins-with-rain · 4 years

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Asian TV Recommendations: Masterpost

I’ve decided to consolidate my Asian TV Recommendations to a single post!

*Updated 10/04/2020: Dance of the Phoenix, The Lost Tomb, Reunion: The Sound of the Providence

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A Love So Beautiful

Language: Mandarin Chinese

Can the pure love of 17-year-olds endure through all the challenges of college and adulthood?

Chen Xiao Xi and Jiang Chen are high school friends and neighbors who grew up together. Xiao Xi is happy-go-lucky and doesn’t like to study much but she has a talent for drawing. Jiang Chen is popular for his good looks and high grades, but is cold and indifferent to other people.

Their friends include swimmer Wu Bo Song, who will do anything for XiaoXi, the dorky and over-confident gamer Lu Yang, and Lin Jing Xiao, the most beautiful girl in school (who Lu Yang is hopelessly in love with).

How will the realities of life shape the friendships and love lives of these young adults?

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Abyss (Netflix Original)

Language: Korean

Abyss is a spherical orb that has the power to raise the dead- with a kick: If you were a good person, you are resurrected younger and more attractive. If you were a bad person, your body could change into any form (generally you are at least decades older).

This is all well and good, until kind-hearted (yet unattractive) Cha Min is resurrected as a young hottie and given the Abyss. He finds an old man dead in the road and uses it to save him- unwittingly resurrecting a violent serial killer on his way to murder Cha Min’s best friend and lifelong crush, Criminal Prosecutor Se Yeon.

Cha Min resurrects the vain and petty Se Yeon (who returns to a body identical to her professional rival) and together they must hunt down the murderer- whatever his new face may be.

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Arang and the Magistrate // The Tale of Arang

Language: Korean

The foolhardy ghost of a young woman seeks to discover the truth behind her unjust death and meets a magistrate named Eun-oh, who has the ability to see ghosts.

She is in possession of a distinct hairpin given to Eun-Oh’s missing mother- meaning Arang was holding it when she died. Eun-Oh and Arang’s search for her memories and his mother will become the focus of gods and ghouls alike.

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Ashes of Love // Heavy Sweetness, Ash-Like Frost

Language: Mandarin Chinese

Jin Mi is the secret lovechild of the Flower Deity and the Water Immortal, conceived before the Flower Deity suffers a fatal wound.

The deity gives birth to a baby girl (Jin Mi) on her deathbed, and foresees the infant will face a terrible trial by her 10,000th year. To save her from her fate, the Flower Deity gives Jin Mi a pill that makes it impossible for her to ever feel romantic love. Upon her death, she forbids anyone in the Flower Kingdom from revealing the fact that she had a child.

Several thousand years later, Jin Mi is a bumbling little fairy trapped in The Water Mirror- a gilded prison where low-level fairies can live in peace. Jin Mi believes she is a small Grape Fairy, and lives a happy (if not dull) life within the Mirror with her friends.

When a charred bird falls from the heavens into the Water Mirror, Jin Mi decides to eat save the poor little ‘crow’-- who in reality is Xu Feng, the mighty phoenix son of the Heavenly Emperor. Her decision to not eat save the Fire God will put them at the heart of plots and schemes, romances and adventures spanning the Flower Kingdom, Heavenly Realm, Demon Kingdom, and the Realm of Mortals.

**Trigger Warning: Contains reference to off-camera sexual assault.**

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Because This is My First Life

Language: Korean

Nam Se-Hee is a single man in his early 30's. A highly logical and anti-social man, he is constantly pressured by his family to find a woman and marry her- something he has no interest in whatsoever. The only things that matter in Se-Hee’s life are his cat and working so that he can pay off the mortgage on his house in 30 years.

Yoon Ji-Ho is a single woman in her early 30's. An assistant drama writer, she has lofty dreams and barely two pennies to rub together. The home she and her brother live in is cramped and small- doubly so once she finds out her brother has been living with a wife he never told her about. Ji-Ho is forced out of her home and- due to her financial situation- moves in with a “young woman” she’s only met via text- Nam Se-Hee.

Events unfold that will force Ji-Ho and Se-Hee into a corner from which they can only find one way out:: Enter into a strictly contracted marriage, absent love, romance, or sex, and keep up their ruse around family and friends for a period of two years.

But as time goes on, the cold and robotic Se-Hee and hopeless Ji-Ho begin to develop feelings for one another beyond that of a Landlord and a Tenant. It is only too easy for them to slip into the roles of Husband and Wife.

**Trigger Warning: On-Camera attempted rape, numerous instances of sexual harassment and non-rape assault (ie, groping)**

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Cunning Single Lady

Language: Korean

Na Aera, a woman left with crippling debt after divorcing her husband, learns her ex has become a millionaire off a mobile app she inspired during their time together. She forms a plot to seduce her ex husband, re-marry him, and then take him for half his new net-worth. Her ex is well aware of this plot, and has been waiting for a chance to get some closure of his own for their abrupt split.

There are two questions the pair must find the answer together: How do you scheme against someone if you accidentally fall in love with them again? And why did Na Aera really decide to leave her husband in the first place?

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Dance of the Phoenix

Language: Mandarin Chinese

Feng Wu, a former genius girl in the Junwu Continent, was attacked by her old enemy Zuo Qingluan. In the attack, she lost not only her memories and abilities, but her “phoenix blood” which made her powerful.

In order to save Feng Wu her secret tutor, Master Mu Jiuzhou (a hero thought long dead whose soul is bound inside a ring Feng Wu wears around her neck), exhausted his vitality and fell into a deep coma.

The forces Master Mu Jiuzhou were trying to keep at bay are roiling again, readying for war unless Feng Wu can recover her memories, her power, and survive long enough to release him from the ring.

But if Feng Wu at full power couldn’t stop the evil Zhuo Qingluan’s attack and save herself, what chance does “normal person” Feng Wu have?

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Dear Judge // Your Honor

Language: Korean

Han Soo-Ho and Han Kang-Ho were born as identical twins, but live totally different lives.

Han Soo-Ho is a seemingly righteous judge, respected by all and beloved by his mother no matter how cold and dismissive he is. He is corrupt to his core and sells desired sentences to major corporations, no matter who gets hurt in the crossfire.

Han Kang-Ho, raised in his brother’s shadow, is a petty criminal with 5 separate prison terms under his belt. He flaunts the law and lives an angry and miserable life as the nobody his mother tells him he is.

When Han Soo-Ho is abducted by people intent on getting their own brand of justice, it coincides with Kang-Ho needing somewhere to hide. He secretly takes his brother’s place as a judge. He intends to just cut and run, but begins to fall for judicial intern Song So-Eun, whose blind faith in the justice system is both misguided and infectious.

Han Kang-Ho, once considered trash by his own family, suddenly finds himself highly respected and admired. As a veteran of the criminal justice system he knows every trick and trap, but will he use his knowledge to rake in the dough like his corrupt brother, or will he wield his newfound power to bring mercy to the law?

**Trigger Warning: Contains partially on-camera rape, references to rape, assault, and themes of assault-related PTSD**

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Fairyland Lovers

Language: Mandarin Chinese

Bai Qi is a “spiritual doctor” who travels the world to rid spirits of their obsessions and stop them from becoming monsters. Eons ago he himself was at the threshold of becoming an Evil Spirit, and was saved by a Divine Warrior who helped him find a way to move past his darkness before tragically losing her life.

Isolated from the world and alone with a sprig of his lost love’s peach tree, Bai Qi meets the sunny but hapless actress Lin Xia. Not only does the tree come to life in her presence- and not only can she use the tools left behind by his lost lover- she also has the same face.

Curious, Bai Qi enters into a co-habitation agreement with Lin Xia and she helps him cleanse souls before they can turn into Evil Spirits. As their lives intersect, a memory that Bai Qi sealed away for over ten thousand years begins to surface.

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Flower of Evil

Language: Korean

Baek Hee-Sung seems like the perfect husband.

A craftsman, his hard work allowed his metal-working studio to flourish and he provides a good life for his wife, Detective Cha Ji-Won, and their young daughter. But behind his perfectly sculpted mask hides a dark secret that even his wife does not know:

Baek Hee-Sung is really Do Min-Soo, a boy believed to have aided his father in a series of grizzly serial-murders 18 years ago.

Unfortunately, secrets have a way of coming out, and as a homicide detective, it is Cha Ji-Won’s job to uncover as many of them as she can. A murderer strikes, leaving behind all the hallmarks of the murders committed by Do Min-Soo’s father. Ji-Won finds herself on a dark path that could destroy the very foundations of her happy life.

Who is Baek Hee-Sung? What really happened eighteen years ago? And what will Cha Ji-Won do once she realizes just who she is married to?

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Guardian

Language: Chinese

Super-Detective Zhao Yunlan meets university professor (and powerful supernatural being) Shen Wei and the two men are instantly drawn together by a past one cannot forget and a future the other cannot guess. As they grow closer, they find themselves at the heart of a high-stakes supernatural battle between unknown enemies.

Will the heroic duo’s unique talents- and special bond- be enough to help them outwit the forces of darkness?

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Handsome Siblings (2020 Netflix Edition)

Language: Mandarin Chinese

Hua Wuque is a pillar of righteousness and virtue, the only male disciple of the powerful Yihua Palace cultivation clan. An orphan, he was taken in by the clan leader and her sister and raised with only one goal in life: to find and kill Jiang Xiaoyu, a mighty villain and enemy of Yihua Palace.

So who is Jiang Xiaoyu? Also known as Xiaoyu’er, Jiang Xiaoyu is an orphan himself- the same age as Hua Wuque in fact- raised by the five most feared and hated villains in the world within the confines of the Wicked Canyon. Into Jiang Xiaoyu the villains poured their knowledge, tricks, and ruthlessness, seeking to create the ultimate villain. There is only one problem: As he was raised in the Wicked Canyon and surrounded by nothing but villains, Jiang Xiaoyu mostly uses his abilities to… harm villains and protect the weak.

When Jiang Xiaoyu comes of age and leaves the Wicked Canyon (or rather, becomes too much of a trickster for the villains to handle anymore), Hua Wuque is unleashed to venture from Yihua Palace and hunt down his enemy.

But how could someone kept confined in the Wicked Canyon for the first 18 years of his life be a threat to Yihua Palace? And why must Hua Wuque be the one to kill him (under direction that Jiang Xiaoyu cannot die naturally, be killed by someone else, or kill himself)?

There is a piece of the story Jiang Xiaoyu and Hua Wuque do not know: they are orphans of the same tragedy, in which the divine hero Jiang Feng spurned the love of both leaders of Yihua Palace for a beautiful servant named Hua Yuenu. Hua Yuenu was forced to commit suicide and Jiang Feng killed himself rather than submit to the Ladies of Yihua–

Leaving behind newborn (non-identical) twin sons.

Yihua Palace’s plot is a simple (if OTT) act of vengeance against Jiang Feng’s memory:: Force one brother to murder the other, then reveal to Hua Wuque the sin he has committed and let it drive the boy insane.

Will the truth come out before Wuque finds and kills Xiaoyu, or will the evil Ladies of Yihua Palace finally have the vengeance they have waited for for over 18 years? As Wuque and Xiaoyu’s paths cross more and more they strike up an unlikely friendship, even knowing there is no escaping their dark fate.

**Trigger Warning: Later episodes include off-camera sexual assault and on-camera depictions of near-rape.**

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Hello, My Twenties

Language: Korean

With different personalities, life goals, and taste in men, five female college students become housemates in a shared residence called Belle Epoque.

Trigger Warning: Season 1 contains scenes of abuse and forced confinement; Season 2 deals with severe PTSD.

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Hi My Sweetheart

Language: Taiwanese-Mandarin

Xue Hai is a kindhearted (and extremely wealthy) but naïve man who has been sheltered by his big sisters his entire life. He decides to go to college in China- where no one knows him- under the name Da Lang and with the image of a poor scholarship student. There Xue Hai meets the dominant, friendless, and rebellious Bao Zhu. Naturally the two fall in love, but after 4 years together, just as he’s going to reveal his identity and propose, Bao Zhu viciously dumps him.

Fast forward three more years. Xue Hai has transformed himself into a handsome but ruthless playboy who treats women as nothing more than toys to be used and cast aside. When he chances across Bao Zhu once more, he decides to launch a campaign to destroy her heart as thoroughly and mercilessly as she did his.

Except Xue Hai is missing one important piece of their love story: Bao Zhu only left him to protect him from her domineering mother, and she has been searching for her beloved Da Lang ever since.

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Hit the Top // The Best Hit

Language: Korean

A free-spirited idol vanishes in the early 90s and reappears in 2017 where he is given a second chance to mend his previous relationships, form a bond with a son he never knew existed, and perhaps solve his own suspected murder before fate throws him back where he belongs.

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Hotel Del Luna

Language: Korean

Nestled deep in the heart of Seoul’s thriving downtown sits a mysterious hotel, the likes of which no one has ever seen before. Old beyond measure, the building has stood for millennia, an ever-present testament to the fact that things are not always what they seem.

The Hotel Del Luna is the final place on this earth lost souls pass through before they move on to the other side. For centuries the hotel has been under the control of Man Wol- a greedy and suspicious immortal.

When the multi-faced goddess of Fate plants a human in her path to take over as Manager of the hotel, she gives him a task: discover the truth of Man Wol’s grudge and heal her weary soul before Man Wol succumbs to past hatreds and destroys herself forever.

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The King’s Avatar

Language: Mandarin Chinese

In the online multiplayer game Glory, Ye Xiu is well known as the undisputed master of professional sports- though no one outside of the professional teams actually knows what he looks like as he hides his face from media and fans. A player since he was a child- and raised largely in professional player training camps- Ye Xiu has no understanding of the outside world.

Halfway through the season, the money-hungry company behind his team, Excellency Era, forces him out and replaces him with an undisciplined hot-shot. Penniless and with nowhere to go, Ye Xiu crosses the street and enters the Happy Internet Cafe. The owner is a diehard fan of the mysterious Ye Xiu, and hires Ye Qiu as an IT manager not for his experience, but for his shared love of the game.

When Glory launches their tenth server, Ye Qiu throws himself into the game once more. Equipped with ten years of gaming experience, memories of an unfinished pledge to a dead friend, and an incomplete self-made weapon, Ye Qiu will rise from the ashes, forge a new team, and take back his crown.

**This drama sees actor Yang-Yang once again assume the role of Legendary Gamer, as he played previously in ‘Love O2O’ (Recommended below)

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The Lost Tomb**

Language: Mandarin Chinese

50 years ago, a group of Changsha grave robbers known as the “Mystic Nine” dug out manuscripts of the location of treasures from the Warring States period, but soon after almost the entire group was hunted down and slaughtered.

In the present, the young grandchild of the sole survivor, Wu Xie, discovers a secret within his grandfather's notes as well as half of a silk manuscript that may reveal the location of the lost tomb. But there is one problem- the other half of the manuscript is held by a shady organization of tomb raiders eager to break in and steal whatever cultural relics are inside the tomb.

Wu Xie has a "National Treasure” moment and decides that in order to stop the objects in the tomb from vanishing into the black market he will break in first and recover whatever is inside (’I’m going to steal the Declaration of Independence...’).

Wu Xie is helped on his journey by his beloved “Third Uncle” Wu Sanxing, his uncle’s right hand man Panzi, and the mysterious Xiao Ge - a tomb raider who seems to know of traps before they are sprung and whose hand has been mutilated in a way not seen among tomb robbing families in over a century.

They expected to find a lost tomb, perhaps chase away some thieves, and learn about an exciting piece of lost history. What they did not expect was for the tomb to strike back, the dead to rise, and the past to fight and keep what secrets it holds.

Who exactly are this alternate group of tomb robbers? What are they searching for? What exactly is protecting the tomb? Whose side is Xiao Ge truly on? And- most crucially- can Wu Xie survive long enough to find the answers?

** This recommendation is part of a broader series of shows and movies, all adapted from “The Gravedigger’s Notebook” and its sequels::

The Lost Tomb (2015)

The Lost Tomb 2: Explore With the Note (2016)

Time Raiders (2016 movie)

The Mystic Nine (2016)

Tomb of the Sea (2018)

Reunion: The Sound of the Providence (which gets its own recommendation below; 2019-2020)

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Love O2O

Language: Mandarin Chinese

** O = letter, not number

Wei-Wei has both beauty and brains. A computer goddess, she aspires to be an online game developer. In her spare time, she plays her favorite online game ‘A Chinese Ghost Story’- where she has made a name for herself as the top female player on the entire server.

After her online husband dumps her, she gets a message from legendary player Yixiao Naihe- asking to become her online husband (marriages in-game offer certain benefits and quest lines single players cannot achieve).

Little does Wei-Wei know that Yixiao Naihe is also her college senior and the most desired man on campus, Xiao Nai.

Will their online chemistry lead to a real-life romance? Yes. Of course it will. It’s in the title.

** Can’t get enough of Xiao Nai (Yang-Yang) as the Legendary Gamer? Check out his new show ‘The King’s Avatar’ (Recommended above).

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My Roommate is a Detective

Language: Mandarin Chinese

Shanghai in 1925 is caught between gang leaders and the European powers colonizing China.

A resourceful young police officer named Qiao Chu Sheng is on the trail of a brutal but devious killer. Realizing that the police force will need some extra help with this difficult case, he decides to form an elite crime-busting detective team. He reaches out Lu Yao, a Cambridge graduate a slick con-man.

Qiao Chu Sheng has learned that Lu Yao has remarkable powers of deduction and a brilliant mind – and believes he can help crack this difficult case. To round off the team, he enlists the help of Bai You Ning, a focused young female reporter for a daily newspaper. A free-thinking, independent young woman, she has a strong sense of justice – and pledges to help catch the killer.

The trio form a small detective squad that specializes in solving strange and unsettling murder mysteries.

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Mystic Pop-Up Bar

Language: Korean

Mystic Pop-up Bar tells the story of a mysterious outdoor drinking establishment run by an ill-tempered woman named Wol Joo, an innocent part-time employee named Han Kang Bae, and a former afterlife detective known as Chief Gwi who visit customers in their dreams to help resolve their problems.

To atone for a devastating mistake in her past life, Wol-Joo must aleviate the suffering of 100,000 individuals. After 500 years the counter stands at 99,990, but the impatient judges of the afterlife are tired of Wol-Joo’s bad attitude and increasing hatred of humanity.

She now has just one month to save 10 people, or else her soul will be destroyed forever.

**It’s worth noting the heavy similarities between Mystic Pop-Up Bar and Hotel Del Luna, though it should be said that Mystic Pop Up Bar’s script was finished first while Hotel Del Luna was made more quickly. The similarities between the two shows appears to be coincidental.

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Oh My Emperor

Language: Mandarin Chinese

Fei-Fei, a young doctor, is wounded in an accident and finds herself trapped in the ancient and mystical nation of Huang Dao. The people of Huang Dao are ruled by a king born of the stars- the physical embodiment of one of the twelve zodiac constellations. To keep discord from arising among the people, the Twelve Zodiac Masters govern together to keep the peace.

But a thirteenth sign has been forcibly subjugated, it’s Lord executed, and its people scattered to the wind. The lost sign- Ophiuchus- is rising once more- and Fei-Fei is its (unwilling) Master.

It only complicates matters slightly that Fei-Fei finds herself between the handsome and charming Master of Aquarius and his nephew- the cold Master of Capricorn (who is also the Emperor). Can Fei-Fei keep her identity secret long enough to solve the mystery of the Ophiuchus purge- or is Huang Dao doomed to destruction?

**This drama is a showpiece for members of the Chinese pop group X-Nine, do not judge it by the same standards as a traditional drama. Showpiece dramas tend to be a bit silly.

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Oh My Ghost

Language: Korean

Soon-Ae is the ghost of a woman who died a virgin. Believing getting laid is her only chance to move on before she becomes an evil spirit, she possesses the body of Bong Sun- an introvert with extremely low self esteem.

Acknowledging it isn’t an ideal arrangement, Soon-Ae decides help Bong Sun and focuses her seductive attentions on the man Bong Sun is secretly in love with. Bong Sun reluctantly agrees, hoping Soon-Ae’s influence will make her more outgoing and self-assured.

There are two problems with the girls’ plan once it goes into motion: Bong Sun’s colleagues worry she has had a mental breakdown and refuse to take advantage of her; and the longer Soon-Ae is in Bong Sun’s body the more she remembers of her own brutal assault and murder.

Soon-Ae’s unfinished business might have more to do with justice than tapping a hot chef, but can she solve her murder without putting Bong Sun in danger?

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Psychopath’s Diary

Language: Korean

In the wrong place at the wrong time, kind-hearted and timid Dong Shik plays witness to a gruesome murder. As if that weren’t bad enough, he stumbles across the killer’s diary-a horrible record of his heinous crimes and the psychotic ramblings of a narcissistic sociopath.

Chased by the killer, Dong Shik runs into traffic and is hit by a police officer. After waking up from a brief coma, Dong Shik is left with 2 things: total amnesia, and the murderer’s diary. Dong Shik mistakes himself for the serial killer, and his personality begins to twist.

Can a timid man become a monster? What of the actual serial killer? With no diary to ground him, it’s only a matter of time before the killer loses what little control he once had.

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Reunion: The Sound of the Providence**

Language: Mandarin Chinese

Wu Xie, “Fatty” Wang Pangzi, and the quasi-immortal tomb raider Xiao Ge (AKA Zheng Qiling, Kylin, and “Poker Face”) have faced many dangerous tombs together over the past twelve years.

Now, it is time for them to go on their last great adventure as the so-called “Iron Triangle” before Wu Xie sets off on the journey all must eventually make: death. He always thought his end would come in a dangerous tomb, but instead it will be lung cancer that claims his life. With only 3-4 months left to live, Wu Xie hides the truth of his illness from his friends and family, revealing the truth only to Xiao Ge.

Once upon a time, Wu Xie was told that when a man meets his death he must do so with a clear conscience. But something has been weighing on Wu Xie- his Third Uncle’s disappearance at the end of their first adventure. Right on time, a message from his long lost uncle appears, setting Wu Xie on a desperate mission to find him before the cancer eating away at his body destroys him at last.

This will most likely be Wu Xie’s final journey, but he will do anything in his power to make sure his friends and family will be safe long after his time is up. In the final 3-4 months of Wu Xie’s life he will seek to unravel the mystery of the “Thunder City”- starting with the most dangerous tomb he’s ever explored, The South Sea King’s Tomb.

The sound of thunder hides a secret men have killed for, but is there really a way to hear the words of gods within it? Someone clearly thought so, but who? Is Uncle Sanxing still alive, or is someone in the shadows guiding Wu Xie to them?

Wu Xie’s enemies thought he was dangerous before, but now he is a dying man with a mission. There is no telling what lengths he will go to in order to achieve his goals. He might just manage to die in a tomb after all...

** This recommendation is just the latest installment in an entire series of stories adapted from “The Gravedigger’s Notebook” and related novels::

The Lost Tomb (2015)

The Lost Tomb 2: Explore With the Note (2016)

Time Raiders (2016 movie)

The Mystic Nine (2016)

Tomb of the Sea (2018)

Reunion: The Sound of the Providence (2019-2020)

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The Romance of Tiger and Rose

Language: Mandarin Chinese

Chen Xiao Qian has dedicated her life to making her dream of becoming a well-respected screenwriter come true. Standing on the production set of sweeping dramas she penned through endless blood, sweat, and tears, Xiao Qian can hardly believe what she is seeing: her work, come to life!

Except it isn’t a set. And her work truly has come to life.

Her script is a simple one: the heirs of two rival cities who seek to destroy one another enter into a doomed romance that will lead to endless betrayals and a war that will kill the male lead, Han Shuo.

There is just one problem- Xiao Qian wakes in the body of Han Shuo’s first wife on the day he will murder her! The only way for Xiao Qian to return to this world is to survive the story, but in keeping herself alive longer the script begins to change, and Han Shuo begins to fall in love with the wrong person.

At first it is easy for Xiao Qian to keep herself alive- just go along with the script! But the story wants to return to the original plot, which means characters who should be friends become enemies, enemies become friends, and Xiao Qian might not live long enough to find her way home.

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Secret Healer // Mirror of the Witch

Language: Korean

Once upon a time an evil shaman helped the Crown Princess conceive twins- but into the Princess’ womb she also cast a dark curse capable of destroying the nation. Her plans were thwarted by her former mentor- who at the command of the Princess consolidated the curse from two twins into just one- the female child. The world believes the shaman destroyed the princess, burning the baby in holy flame to purge the curse- but instead he decides to raise her and try to help her break the curse upon her.

If she dies before the curse is lifted, it will unleash hell and destroy the nation. To break the curse she must fulfill wishes- but the evil shaman’s life is bound to the curse she cast so long ago. As the curse starts to break, she realizes the child is not as dead as she was lead to believe and begins a campaign to root her out and destroy her.

The princess forms a bond with a young scholar who becomes entangled in the princess’ curse and will stop at nothing to help free her. Her curse carries a catch though: Anyone she loves will die... and anyone who loves her will also perish.

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Strong Woman Do Bong Soon

Language: Korean

A freakishly strong- but totally sweet- woman is caught between the love of her arrogant but handsome boss and her disinterested lifelong crush.

Her boss wants her to embrace her supernatural strength and use it proudly, but she loves that her crush treats her like someone weak and in need of protection. Bong Soon will have to chose for herself if she will suppress her strength for her childhood crush or unleash herself to protect those she loves.

A murderer prowling the streets might make that decision for her though...

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The Untamed

Language: Mandarin Chinese

On the cliffs of the Nightless City, upon defeating his enemies in a bloody slaughter, the cruel and vicious Yiling Patriarch- Wei Wuxian- threw himself to his death.

Sixteen years later, he is resurrected by a madman and given a second chance to right what went so terribly wrong long ago. Wei Wuxian reunites with the honorable, righteous, and stern Lan Wangji- his confidant, soulmate, and best friend.

How can someone as upstanding as Lan Wangji befriend the monstrous and hated Yiling Patriarch? What turned the happy and popular Wei Wuxian into the man who slaughtered thousands at Nightless by weaponizing the souls of the dead?

And what terrible secret was Wuxian resurrected to unearth?

The past is not always what it seems, and there is no clean line between right and wrong.

**This story is told in two sections: Episode 2 enters a 30-episode flashback sequence showing Wei Wuxian’s path from popular youth to the monster upon the Cliffs of Nightless, with the first 1.5 episodes, and the last 20, dealing with the “present”. Don’t worry if you’re lost when the show starts, that is by design.

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You’re Beautiful

Language: Korean

Go Mi Nyeo has only one goal in life: To take her final vows and become a nun. Her twin brother, Go Mi Nam, desires nothing more than the life of an idol so that he can use his fame to find their missing mother.

Go Mi Nam’s dream is in jeopardy after a botched surgery and his twin must put her life on hold to quite literally step into his shoes and cover for her brother.

She joins the band A.N.JELL and quickly ends up on the bad side of their more devil-like leader. Can Go Mi Nyeo hide her true identity from her band-mates long enough for her brother to return?

No. No she cannot. By the end of the first day all but one- the goofy and loving Jeremy- know that she is no man... But they let her think she’s fooled them. It’s funnier that way.

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W: Two Worlds

Language: Korean

Is it possible to live in the same place at the same time, but in a completely different dimension?

Yeon Joo is a second-year cardiothoracic resident doctor. Her father, creator of the world famous web series ‘W’ suddenly disappears one day. While searching for him Yeon Joo finds a strange man covered in blood and only barely manages to resuscitate him before the words “To Be Continued” flash across her vision and he disappears.

When she returns, there is a new chapter of her father’s blockbuster series available online- one that features a doctor with her exact name and clothing saving a man covered in blood...

Where is Yeon Joo’s father? How is the story updating itself? As she is dragged into the world of ‘W’ with increasing frequency Yeon Joo and the story’s leading man, Kang Chul, must answer the most important question of all:

Is it possible something from that world escaped into this one?

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Well Intended Love (Season 1: Drama Version)

Language: Mandarin Chinese

Seasons 1 and 2 of “Well Intended Love” feature the same stars playing the same characters, but the storylines are alternate-universes of one another telling the story from a different genre. Each season is its own wholly contained entity that does not impact- and is not impacted by- the other season in any way.

A third-rate actress with leukemia becomes entangled with the handsome but cold CEO Ling.

In order to receive a bone marrow transplant and contniue her career as an actress, Xia Lin enters into a secret marriage with Ling Yi Zhou. Despite the conspiracies and misunderstandings they encounter, the two begin to find true love.

But one question nags at Xia Lin’s mind:: Why did the cold, controlling, and distant Ling YiZhou need her to play the role of wife?

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Well Intended Love (Season 2: Rom-Com Version)

Language: Mandarin Chinese

Rising TV superstar Xia Lin finds herself embroiled in scandal after a run-in with business mogul Ling Yizhou at a party. To clear up any misunderstandings the two prepare a joint press conference-- where Xia Lin is stunned by Ling Yizhou’s statement that the two are- in fact- an engaged couple.

Ling Yizhou convinces Xia Lin to play fiancee for a period of one year, after which they can go their separate ways. To save face in front of her fans, Xia Lin agrees. She gradually begins to fall for the lovable and doting Ling Yizhou.

Someone works in the shadows to destroy everything Ling Yizhou holds dear- and the closer he gets to the heart of the conspiracy, the more he realizes Xia Lin may have a target on her back as well.

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What’s Wrong With Secretary Kim

Language: Korean

Can you be so self-absorbed that you have no idea what’s truly going on around you? Yeong Joon is Vice President of his family-owned company, Yoomyung Group. He is so narcissistic that he doesn’t pay attention to what his trusty secretary Kim Mi So is trying to tell him most of the time.

After nine years of making Yeong Joon look good and stroking his very large ego, Mi So decides to quit her job, citing a desire for a life outside of work and the chance to fall in love. Yeong Joon does not take the disruption of his routine well, and decides the only logical course of action is to make Mi So fall in love with him, thus guaranteeing she will stay by his side.

A dark secret from Yeong Joon’s past may hold the key to why he can’t let her go, but will Mi So stick around long enough to discover the truth?

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413 notes · View notes

bangstanfics · 4 years

Text

Ode to Safe Travels || JJK

☆ Pairing: Knight!Jungkook x Princess!Reader

☆ Word Count: 4.8k

☆ Rating: 17+

☆ Genre: Medieval au, royalty au, star crossed lovers, romance, angst, and more angst

☆ Warnings: Major character death, implications of smut

☆ Summary: It was a forbidden romance that was bound to end up in tragedy. You both knew that, and yet that didn’t stop you from falling hopelessly in love with your metaphorical and literal knight in shining armor, Jeon Jungkook.

☆ A/N: My first ever fic, oh gawd I wasn’t sure when (or if) I was going to post this, but Valentines Day seemed like a good day. This short story is part of my “A Second Chance at Love” series (a series about lovers whose circumstances caused them to not end up together during their first life, but are given a second chance when they are reincarnated) and is the prequel to my main story “Chasing Stars.” Also, all the italicized writing is the present, and the regular text are flashbacks of the past. Yes! That was done with a purpose and no I won't directly say why (unless you figure it out owo). Enough of my blabbing, I hope you all enjoy!! :)

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I’ll be with you, forever.

It was his promise to you as he sat in his barren cell, deprived of the basic necessities of life - food, water, human contact. The shackles around his arms denying him access to one last touch of your skin, to caress your cheek and brush away the tears that you couldn’t stop from falling. His big doe eyes that reflected stars now reflected your contorted expression, overtaken with grief. Despite his circumstances, he managed to smile and attempted to ease your fears with his words.

God, how you hated yourself in that moment. There he was, waiting for his moment to come on death’s vendetta, yet he was comforting you. You, the princess who spent her sheltered life behind the castle walls, ignorant to famen, war, and poverty. You, the princess who was always draped in the finest silks and gold and carried herself with too much pride. You, the princess who was always pampered by servants and knights alike, adored by the entire kingdom.

Finding solace in his words was a privilege you would not allow yourself to have in that moment.

“Would you like to have a different meal prepared, your Highness?” the voice of the servant cut through your heavy thoughts, pulling you back to the present. You glanced down at your untouched food before turning your attention back to the girl. She was new, you noted, and unaware of the fact that your lack of appetite had nothing to do with the food, and everything to do with the memories of him that constantly flooded your mind.

“No,” you answered after a moment of silence, “This will suffice.”

She waited, as if expecting more, but when you offered nothing of the sort she bowed her head respectfully and left the dining hall, leaving you alone to replay that fateful day over and over again.

He was right, though. Even after his passing, you saw and heard him everywhere you went. His hushed voice in the wind, calling your name. His shadow trailing your footsteps of abandoned corridors. His lingering scent in the sheets of your chambers. Even now, in this massive hall with the long table stretched out before you, you could feel the weight of his presence sitting in the empty chair across from you. The ghost of his smile barely visible to your eye and yet you can remember it so distinctly. However, rather than comfort, it only served as a bitter reminder of the future that was abruptly taken away from you.

You closed your eyes once again and allowed your consciousness to drift back to that day, resuming from the point where you hopelessly reached your hand through the bars in an attempt to seek refuge in the warmth of his arms. He did the same, extended his hand out towards you, but the chains that restrained him to the wall only allowed him to move a few feet. Your desperate attempts to reach each other proving futile against the cell bars.

“Please don’t leave me,” you pleaded through your sobs, “Please don’t leave me all alone. I can’t do this without you.”

His smile was weak, but reassuring, “My love,” his voice barely above a whisper, all the might and confidence you were so accustomed to hearing had disappeared, “Don’t say that. You are the strongest person I know. Hell, the strongest person in this nation. Do what you always do when you fall, jump back up and keep moving forward.” You shake your head, unable to speak through your broken sobs. You wanted to tell him he was wrong. The truth behind your unwavering nature was not an iron will, but the knowledge that if you fell, Jungkook would be right there to catch you and help you back up.

“Jungkook please,” you tried again, “Let me fix this.”

“But there is nothing to fix,” he tried to reason, “Our destiny had already been mapped out in the stars long ago. I know you do not believe in these myths and folklore, but sometimes there are moments in this lifetime that are meant to happen to allow others destinies to fully take course.”

This destiny he was so fixated on, meant nothing to you if he wasn’t there to take part in the journey with you. You wanted to tell him that, but the words stayed as a lump in your throat as you stared into his brown orbs. The unwavering determination was set ablaze in his eyes, as he sent you a silent message - he was doing this for you. In that moment, you were faced with a burden so great that the mere thought of it left the impression of the universe’s vast loneliness coursing through you.

You had to leave him.

Turn around and allow him to take part in fate’s cruel plans.

“I love you,” were the final words you had to offer, “I love you so damn much,” your cries growing louder with each passing declaration, knowing it will be your last.

“And I love you,” he projected what little strength he had into this confession, so they would never leave you, “Even after my time in this world has come to an end, my love for you will not end with it.”

You felt your hands tremble at your sides as the desire to embrace him one last time overwhelmed you. To brush your lips over his and murmur sweet nothings into his ears to reassure him that your heart was forever his and nothing, not even death, could break that bond. Your lover, your best friend, your world. He was it all and so much more.

With a heavy heart, you rose from your spot on the ground and left without a second glance. Too afraid that if you did, your resolution would break and you would run back to Jungkook’s cell. Instead, as you traveled down the dimly lit hall, you broke into uncontrollable sobs. The force of your whimpers reverberating through your chest, causing the halls to echo back your sorrows. Your hands found their way to your hair as you began rummaging through your locks, searching your head for an answer. A swarm of profanities whirled your mind as they attempted to escape through your mouth. You physically had to bite your tongue to prevent yourself from revealing your location to the castle guards. But the insanity of the situation was getting too much and with each passing second your hope continued to dwindle close to nothing. You frantically shook your head, forcing the negative thoughts away. Jungkook already had given up, so you knew you couldn’t do the same.

You were at a loss for breathe as you found yourself hyperventilating, knees succumbing to the reality of the situation. Was there really nothing you could do to save him? You clawed at your chest, desperate for air as your head sunk lower and lower, eyes meeting the concrete floors. Your vision was filled with nothing but the gray cracks and crevices, hoping to find a silver lining in any one of its imperfections. But there was nothing and when you realized this, you screamed. An ear curdling scream meant for the heavens, hoping they would hear your plea and allow Jungkook to live.

“Your Highness, are you alright?” a heavy breathe brought you down from the memory you were reliving and you realized you were no longer seated at the dining table. To your side, the familiar face of the Head maid with a look of concern etched onto her features. Of all people you had to encounter, you just had to encounter her - Mrs. Kim. The same woman who helped raise you and feed you when your parents were busy managing their kingdom. The same woman who kissed your wounds and was your shoulder to cry on. The same woman who gave birth to one of your closest friends, Kim Namjoon. The same woman who betrayed you.

“Don’t touch me!” you immediately recoiled from her touch, the momentum of your movements, bringing you down to the floor as a result.

“But Your Highness--” Mrs. Kim reached out to help you up, but you responded by scurrying further back, until your back hit the end of a wall.

“Don’t touch me! Don’t look at me! Don’t help me! Just get away!”

Mrs. Kim was visibly hurt by your words, you could tell by the way her eyes clouded with tears, but you couldn’t stop the words from spilling from your mouth. Afterall, she was the one who revealed your relationship with Jungkook to your parents.

“What if… we ran away together?” you whispered to Jungkook one night after love making. Your naked bodies intertwined between the silk sheets of your bed, as the soft rays of the moonlight peeking through your windows enhanced Jungkook’s features. His doe eyes seemed to sparkle more, his smile was bigger and brighter than you’ve ever seen it. Then again, you could attribute that to the fact he had an orgasm not even ten minutes ago, but still - he seemed different. A radiating glow. You wondered if you had one too.

“Where would we even go?” he decided to entertain the idea, although deep down he knew it was impossible. Your parents would spend whatever resources necessary to bring you back here to Reeva. Afterall, you were, not only the eldest, but the most qualified of your siblings to inherit the throne. Your younger sister, a carefree spirit who would rather spend her time exploring the city than learning how to write eloquent letters to convince an enemy kingdom to decrease their tariffs, did not have the knowledge or skill to be a bridge between the people and the law. Your younger brother, a fool most people would describe him, but you saw him as a man with no ambition. He was indifferent to the world and would rather spend his time exploring the beds of the young maidens in the castle. That left Reeva in your hands.

“Anywhere. Everywhere.” You finally decided as your answer, “The world has so much to offer us, Jungkook. Why stay in a place that forbids us to love each other just because I’m seen as heir to the throne and you’re seen as my protector.” Jungkook loved hearing you talk about your immense love for him. The way you would sacrifice everything for him. He had never known a love so deep and pure. Growing up as an orphan, he thought love was a concept that didn’t exist. People would abandon each other eventually, it was only a matter of time. Yet, with you, no matter how many times he failed or made himself look like a fool, you remained by his side and encouraged him to get back up. He reached out his hand and gently stroked your cheek, admiring the way you released a content sigh at the physical contact.

“A place where we could love each other freely…” he tested the idea with his tongue, saying it out loud for the first time. He had to admit, a swarm of butterflies invaded his chest at the mere thought of being able to hold your hand freely in public. Without any spectators giving him dirty looks, or covering their mouths to point out how you carried an air of grace, while he carried himself with the mannerism of a commoner.

“Mmhm… Doesn’t that sound nice?” you smiled sleepily, your previous activities with Jungkook draining you of most of your energy, but you still had enough power to lean forward and press your lips against his in a soft, sweet kiss. You could feel him smile against your lips before releasing a low hum of agreement.

The moment, like every beautiful moment in life, did not last.

The door to your chambers was forced open with a great kick. Startled, you and Jungkook pulled away from each other, as your first instinct was to cover yourself up with your linen. Guards came swarming into your space and surrounded the bed you shared with Jungkook. You couldn’t even process everything that was happening. The motion of the clustered bodies moving like a blur, until two distinct presence made themselves known. Your blood ran cold as you noticed the fire that ignited in your father’s eyes as he took in the scene before him - you and Jungkook in your bed together, naked and covered in love bites. He didn’t even give you time to explain yourself before he was marching over to Jungkook’s side and drawing the tip of his sword to your lover’s neck.

“Father wait--” you tried to reason with him, thinking he was about to drag the blade against Jungkook’s throat, but he proceeded with words rather than action, much to your surprise.

“You will be tried for high treason against the royal family. You will be stripped of your title as a member of the Battle Triumph Soldiers. And you will no longer be known as a knight of Reeva. Should you be found guilty of your crime, there is only one punishment fitting of such betrayal - death. Do you have any objections?”

You sucked in a deep breathe at the word “death” knowing well that the council (comprised of your father, mother, your father’s advisor Sir Lee and Commander Bang) would unanimously find Jungkook guilty. The hard stare your father sent Jungkook was meant to be intimidating, you could tell, but all you could see in his eyes was pity and despair. He was, after all, the one who took Jungkook under his wing and trained him to be the man he is today. Despite the tough front your father always portrayed, you always knew he had a soft spot for Jungkook. He was every inch of what the king wanted your brother to be, but could never achieve. But at that moment, he was casting all emotions aside and using his head to make every decision. The King couldn’t risk a scandal like this being exposed to the other kingdoms. They would seize it as an opportunity to cast doubt over his authority and possibly overthrow him. Jungkook was no longer a boy orphaned by war, he was a man who had to take responsibility for his actions.

“No, I have no objections.”

Wide eyed, you whipped your head to the man next to you and looked at him in disbelief. Was the post-orgasm high interfering with his brain? You sat up straighter, carrying an air of dignity that had been instilled into you since birth - you weren’t about to let these men make you feel ashamed for making love to the man you love - and started to protest on his behalf, “On the contrary, he objects to every statement you just made!”

“You will hold your tongue until--” your mother began, but your father raised a hand to silence her.

You decided to use the opportunity to continue talking, “Father, I beg of you, hear me out. None of this was Jungkook’s fault. It was I who initiated this- this- this whole thing. He refused all of my advances, saying he knows his place, but I convinced him that his rightful place should be with me because I--” you paused, unsure if your words was making the situation better or worse for Jungkook, but you were desperate to cling onto anything that would resolve this mess, even if it meant revealing the truth, “Because I lo--”

“I’d hate to reveal my intentions in front of everyone like this, Princess, but I thought I should save you the embarrassment of your next words by speaking my truth.” All you could do was blink inquisitively at Jungkook, whose demeanor and attitude had suddenly transformed into one you had never seen before, “And that truth is… I used you. Well, used your body more specifically.” It was like choking on air as you listened to Jungkook’s confession. Nothing was holding your throat hostage, yet you were finding it difficult to breathe. Why are you doing this? You wanted to scream at him. Why are you lying so effortlessly in front of everyone? Why are you trying to take all the blame? “You made it so easy for me too. With the way you practically flung yourself at me every time we were alone. I almost felt bad stringing you along... Almost. Then again, sleeping with you did also pose some benefits seeing how I got to sleep in these luxurious chambers rather than my worn out closet space.”

Jungkook’s “confession” landed him a swift blow to his face, courtesy of your father who either believed his story or wanted to believe his story just so he could portray Jungkook to be the villain in this entire mess, “Father, stop!” Your first instinct was to jump in front of the dark haired boy and use your own body as a shield, but the guard closest to you captured your arm, preventing you from doing so. Your father took another swing at the knight and the momentum of his hit threw Jungkook to the floor with a loud thud. You watched in horror as the King pulled his leg back and swiftly landed a kick to what you presumed, judging from the suffocated groan, was Jungkook’s abdomen. “Enough!” you finally yell with a force so great, that even the guard gripping your arm was startled. With a ragged breath, and tears on the brink of escape, you yanked your arm from the guard and crawled to the other edge of the bed to where your father was standing, “Please, have mercy on him,” you begged, head hung low and hands clasped together as if you were praying to a saint. From the corner of your eye, you focused on Jungkook’s remorse expression and apologized mentally that you couldn’t do more for him. You couldn’t gauge your father’s reaction, but you knew he must have been furious seeing his heir to the throne on her knees, for a man who didn’t possess an ounce of royal blood.

Your father cleared his throat, a sign for you to raise your head. His eyes lacked emotion so you couldn’t tell what he was thinking, “Guards, dress him and lock him up in the dungeons. I don’t want him in my sights for another second,” he finally commanded. Two men quickly found Jungkook’s discarded articles of clothing and dressed him before dragging him out of your room. Your eyes followed his body’s movement, even when he was out of sight, all you could do was stare helplessly at the door, “Leave us,” your father commanded the remaining guards, who quickly scurried away from his tone.

“How did you know?” you finally decided to ask after a moment of silence. Your eyes were still transfixed on the empty doorway, waiting for his answer, until a new figure came into view. She hung her head low in shame and her shoulders slouched forward to make herself seem as small as she felt at that moment.

“I have eyes all over the castle, my dear. As loyal as they are to you, they will always prioritize their loyalty to me, their King.” You couldn’t even process his words as an overwhelming sense of denial rushed through your system. Not her. Of all the people to betray you, please not her.

“Mrs. Kim?” you called out weakly, afraid that speaking her name out loud would confirm your fears. However, as soon as her name was called, she took the remaining steps to enter your room and make her presence known, “How- How could you?”

She bit her lip back in guilt, seemingly a loss for words to justify her actions. However, what came out next only made your hatred for the woman grow, “I’m so sorry. I have nothing else to say except that I’m so terribly sorry and that I hope you can find it in your heart to forgive me.”

A harsh tug on your shoulder brought you back to reality as you realized that Mrs. Kim pulled you back to your feet and began shaking you frantically.

“I know you can never trust me again after what I did to you, but all I ask is that you listen to my reason for doing so.”

“I refuse! No explanation can take back the consequences of your actions. You have betrayed not just me or Jungkook, but Namjoon and the rest of the Battle Triumph Soldiers. Do you not see the pain in their eyes during war tactic conferences as they stare at the empty seat that once belonged to Jungkook? Or how Namjoon still expects Jungkook to pull one of his antics right before training? Maybe you’ve seen how Seokjin still sharpens and polishes Jungkook’s sword every morning? Or noticed how Yoongi still eats half his meal because he thinks Jungkook would ask for the rest of it? Can you tell Hoseok is still the first to take off his gear because he expects Jungkook to jump on his back? Do you see Jimin linger at Jungkook’s door? Longing for a friend to confide his struggles to? Have you watched Taehyung visit Jungkook’s grave with flowers and just cry uncontrollably? Because I’ve seen it Mrs. Kim. I’ve seen it all. And seeing them go through that reopens every wound Jungkook’s death has caused and refreshes every ounce of hatred I have towards you.” Mrs. Kim can’t even think of a response to your confession. Her grip on her shoulder fell as she stood motionless in the middle of the hall. A quick observation of your surroundings helped you determined that you were in the middle of the West hall, the hall that leads to the battle arena.

Your blood ran cold as the gates of the arena stared you down, taunting you with the knowledge of what that place represented. As you expected, Jungkook was found guilty of treason sentenced to death. How you wish your father showed mercy by making it a quick execution. Rather, he chose to spark a flame of hope within you by sentencing him to a duel - a battle to save his life. Jungkook was a talented knight, that was an undeniable fact that the entire kingdom knew, but his opponent, Sir Hyun, was exemplary. As the Head Knight, nations quaked in fear when they crossed his path and would rather be met with a death by a blade than at the hands of Sir Hyun. He was relentless when given a task and always made sure to leave no victim behind. A madman is what most would call him, and they would be completely justified in their beliefs. The bottom of your lip began to quiver as flashes of that day played out.

Jungkook dragging his practically lifeless body to the center of the arena.

His opponent’s merciless attacks on his weakened body.

Jungkook’s poor attempts at defending himself.

The battle ending with a fatal blow to your lover’s chest.

“Princess?” Mrs. Kim tried capturing your attention when she noticed your rigid state, but it was no use, you couldn’t escape the image painted inside your head. The only man you ever loved lying in a crimson pool, choking on his own blood. The way you ran to him and held his head in your lap as your tears decorated his pale face. The quiet hush that fell over the crowd as they watched you cradle your lover back and forth. The heartbroken wails that escaped your lips as you desperately yelled for anyone to help him. The audience only offered silent murmurs of what they speculated was going on. Your parents, the King and Queen of the kingdom, astonished by the events unfolding in front of him.

“Mother! Father! Please, I love him!” Their silent judgment only brought fresh tears to your face as you realized they would offer no aid to the dying man. His voice called out what sounded like your name, so you focused your attention back to him, leaning closer so he wouldn’t strain himself trying to speak up.

“D- Dont be afraid of go-goodbye.”

You frantically shook your head, refusing to believe this is where it ends for the both of you, “No, no, no. This isn’t goodbye, it can’t be. I refuse to accept it.”

His weak smile caused you to grimace, knowing how much effort it must take for the small action, “It’s okay…” he muttered, his voice notably getting fainter, “Because I promise you… I’ll find you again.” Your brows knitted together in confusion at his words.

“Wha-What do you mean you’ll find me again?”

He broke into a smile at your inquisitive stare. How is it that even as death lay waiting at his door he could still see every detail etched into your face. From the small crease in your brow, to the small crinkles around your glassy eyes as you tried to decipher his words. Knowing that it would be Jungkook’s last time seeing your face he made sure to take in every detail and appreciate the beauty that you are, “One day…” he began, the throbbing pain in his chest was slowly subsiding. He wasn’t sure if that was a good sign or a bad one, but he welcomed the peace, “We’ll be together again.”

Still confused by his words, thinking his wound was making him confused, you shook your head once again, “I don’t want to wait until one day. I want to be with you right now. Now. I wanted to live the rest of our lives together. Have children together along the way and start a family. To grow old and watch our generations prosper. Doesn’t that sound nice, Jungkook?”

His smile turned into a painful one. Not because of his injury, but because he could perfectly see the future you described. Two children, one boy and one girl, running around a small cottage as you sat in his lap with eyes full of love at the children you two had created. At night when the children were in bed, you and him would be awake, confessing your heart’s desires through touches and kisses. He could see it so vividly in front of him that he almost convinced himself that he wasn’t currently dying, but Jungkook knew. He knew it was unattainable.

“It sounds wonderful.” he confessed, voice growing weaker, “And we don’t have to say goodbye to that dream, just… until next time.”

At the mention of ‘until next time’, you understood what he meant. Reeva had a tradition when seeing their knights off to battle in foregin territory. From a young age, every inhabitant of the kingdom was required to memorize a stanza entitled an Ode to Safe Travels. You always found it ridiculous because you thought it was nothing but a poetic way of saying goodbye. As you grew older and wiser, you realized it was not a poetic goodbye, but a promise to be reunited once again, whether it be in this life or the next one. And so with a tear stained face, you inched your face closer to Jungkook and whispered your farewells.

“For honor, you part from this kingdom,” your voice was broken from tears as you recite the lines you have spoken countless times to Jungkook before he was sent off to battle, but this time it was different because you knew he would not return from the place he going to, “In glory, you find victory in the next.” He raised a hand to brush away a few of your tears and hold your cheek in the palm of his hand. You welcomed his touch by leaning into it and holding it firm against your face, “Safe travels wherever the wind carries you.” You watched as tranquility took over his features and his eyes began to flutter close. Your heart clenched painfully at the sight and you squeezed his hand that was resting against your cheek in hopes of transferring some of your life force into him. However, dragging on the seconds into minutes would not extend Jungkook’s life so you forced yourself to finish the rest of the poem, “And may the stars guide you back to me,” He used his remaining strength to force a smile, sealing his promise to be reunited with you once again, whenever that may be.

“For honor, you part from this kingdom. In glory, you find victory in the next. Safe travels wherever the wind carries you. And may the stars guide you back home.”

-Reeva’s parting ode to their knights

#btsbookclub #jungkook au #jungkook x reader #jungkook angst #reader insert #bts #jungkook fanfic #bangstanfics #Ode to Safe Travels

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bakutae · 4 years

Text

second button

pairing: ushijima wakatoshi x reader

context: where he gave away his second button of his school uniform after graduation to a girl, and it's not you

author's note: my first haikyuu fic 🥺 i hope you like itttt this is a special little fic for my bb @shiggywiggy whom i got inspiration for this fic from 🙆‍♀️ also, sorry this fic took so long! i was busy revising for an exam the entirety of this week so-

guys i swear this will be the third and final time i'm reposting this fic 😩 a biiig thank you to @tamasoft for telling me to lessen down my tags 🥺

The gentle breeze that blew by tousled your hair along with it, stirring some dead leaves lying lifelessly on the floor from their slumber.

Soon, leaf by leaf, the leaves start to dance along with the wind, the bright morning reflecting off rays of sunshine, coloring them streaks of white, blinding you.

A somewhat comforting hum reflected into your ears and you tucked a lock of hair behind it, sighing in satisfaction as you made your way to school, a certain sense of determination hanging from the atmosphere.

Today, you were going to do it.

No regrets, no hesitation. Nothing.

You were going to muster up all the courage you tried to desperately hang on to and walk up to him, with a totally not awkward smile plastered on your face as your face heated up automatically, without any command, and you will tell him how you felt.

Well, indirectly, at least. It was the method where your heart would not explode from nerves.

Asking for his second button of his uniform was practically a confession already, and your heart clenched in excitement as the moment edged closer as the school began to fill your line of sight.

There was no reason he would say no.You had noticed how he had looked at you before, you weren't going to deny that. He probably thought he was slick though, with his right hand holding up his chin, looking at you from his seat at the back of the classroom.

What he didn't know, was that you weren't actually looking at your friend while talking to her whilst facing Ushijima, since that was where your friend conveniently was when she initiated the conversation.

As her distinct chatter about her newfound boyfriend faded out into the background, you let out a tiny gasp when your eyes flickered over to meet his for a split second.

He instantly broke off the eye contact and your lips curled upwards. Catching your friend off guard, you stood up aggressively, accidentally slamming your delicate hands on your table and a wince slipped past your lips.

Silence filled the classroom for a while as your classmates threw incredulous looks in your direction and you raised a hand in apology.

"Why'd you suddenly stand up like that, y/n? That's so unlike you. Anyways, did you know that Kai brought me to get taiyaki yesterday? And since he was broke he could only get one for us to share! Romantic much?"

Seeming to have recovered from her moment of briefly stun, she continued to blabber on about her lover, euphoria brightening up her features significantly and you nodded, though clueless as to what she had been talking about ever since her presence was grandly made by herself.

You then noticed the slight blush that tinted over Ushijima's cheekbones and your eyes widened. Ushijima has never looked any better, with the bright sunlight seemingly shining on him and him only in the dull classroom.

Eyes tracing over his facial features, you admired his eyes that were currently glued to the floor in obvious boredom, but it could be from the embarrassment too, you wouldn't know.

His brown orbs, brighter than ever now that some holy light was shining on him.It almost seemed as though his eyes were slightly... diluted. Your heart took flight at the newfound observation. After all, you had read up that if a guy's pupils dilated while looking at you, it was a sign that he liked you.

Anyway, he wouldn't be romantically attracted to the floor right?

"I'm heading over to Ushi's table, uh maybe we can catch up later after school?" You told her, and displeasure filled her eyes at your words for a second, but they were gone right after you blinked.

"I told you y/n, Kai and I are going to get more taiyakis after school! Have you even been listening?"

Her eyebrows curved just to form a slight frown and she crossed her arms in front of her, all while puffing her cheeks out in exasperation.

"Ahh... Right, of course! Well then, tomorrow! There's always tomorrow."

Without waiting for her reply, you sauntered to Ushijima's desk, when you noticed Tendou creeping up behind Ushijima slowly and you stifled a giggle.

Feigning ignorance, you waved a hand in front of Ushijima's face and his shoulders jumped, as if he didn't notice you coming over.

"Ushi, why're you so quiet? Where's Tendou?"You eyed Tendou as you said it, sarcasm dripping off your words, watching him in amusement as he glared at you playfully, placing a finger over his mouth to silence you, white tape around his fingers catching your view.

As if knowing something was up, Ushijima turned around, but not quick enough before Tendou could violently slam his hand down onto Ushijima's back and you watched as his jaw clenched tightly suddenly.

Uncontrollable giggles flowed out from your tongue, as you blissfully looked at the duo, before Ushijima could react to Tendou, he peeked at you, as he watches color fill your cheeks from laughter, he didn't even feel the need to get revenge.

He just watched you intently, as Tendou threw an arm around your neck and whispered into your ear.

"Damn, you got Wakatoshi wrapped around your finger don't you?"

⊱ ━━━━.⋅ εïз ⋅.━━━━ ⊰

"Ah, y/n. There you are." A deep voice rang out, piercing through the crisp fresh air. Your eyes fluttered around the place and you caught sight of him.

You already knew who it had been, even without turning to look at him physically, you would have known. You've grown so used to his voice from hearing it everyday, and you were going to miss it. You were sure that the two of you would be separated after high school and that thought made you incredibly upset.

There he was, even the clouds that hung above him seemed to look more cheerful than the grey ones everywhere else. However, you forced a quick smile, an attempt to conceal your emotions, and you opened your mouth to reply to him.

"Ah, Ushi! I was meaning to ask you..."

A streak of clear liquid splashed onto your face and you blinked, eyes widening as you looked up into the sky. There was no trace of the clear weather just moments ago and you shivered as a gust of ice cold wind blew past the two of you.

"W-well, I'll tell you later maybe? After graduation? Meet me after it ends at the school's entrance, the same place we're at now alright?"

"Aren't we in the same class? Why the school entrance?"

"I don't...know. The school entrance just sounded cool."

Lies.

You didn't want everyone to hear you ask him for his second button. You didn't want anyone to know about your crush on Ushijima. You didn't want to be running down the hallways for the toilet when he rejected you.

It was all your your own selfish needs.

Ushijima just nodded and began walking away.

"A-ah! Are you not waiting for me? Come on now! We're in the same class you know? It's not as if I were in Tendou's one."

Stuttering, you stomped your foot on the hard floor and pouted, staring at him in joking disbelief. He simply stopped in his tracks, turned his head to the side just a bit and said coolly,

"Well then. H-hurry up and match my pace."

The way his deep voice would occasionally crack was music to your ears, and this happened to be one of those rare blissful moments.

Your cheeks heated up despite yourself and you picked up your speed and chased after him, and significantly slowed down when you were next to him.

The walk back to class was quiet. But it wasn't one of those awkward silences; it was in fact comforting. His presence next to you made your heart squeeze in your chest and a finger absentmindedly twirled a bunch of hair around your finger.

Honestly, you didn't know why you did it. Was it for your own boredom? Or was it so that he would maybe notice you? Your eyes found itself constantly drifting to his hand. His hand was almost twice the size of yours, and you pictured how it'd look like in your mind.

His thumbs gently caressing yours, the callous from his volleyball experience would only make the entire experience even more real. Those were the hands of the guy who has insane spikes, no doubt about it. It even looked the part up close. Such muscular fingers could only be achieved through tireless training for years.

A shaky sigh was let loose at the thought of his spike hitting you and instantly breaking off your arms.

"What are you glancing at?" He asked, staring at you intently.

"I- uh, well nothing."

Your arms flailed around from his sudden comment and you feel it collide with his, a crisp 'smack' sound bouncing off the walls.

Oh my.

Your clumsiness just had to ruin it for you. You berated yourself for slapping him unintentionally and making a fool out of yourself in front of the person you are hopelessly in love with.

"Oh my, Ushijima, I'm so sorry! I didn't mean to accidentally hit you! Oh gosh my clumsiness has done it again!"

Darkness was all you could see as your eyes shut and you stopped walking, waiting for his response with your heart practically leaping out from your chest in anxiety.

"Y/n... Why are you acting so weird? Graduation nerves?"

Your eyelids flew open and you opened your mouth, just to flimsily close it back again.

"Y-yeah. Let's just call it that."

To hide your obvious embarrassment and crimson cheeks, you dashed off before a word could be slipped out from him.

That was close.

You weren't ready for him to know about your feelings just yet.

⊱ ━━━━.⋅ εïз ⋅.━━━━ ⊰

"Last but not least, Kaito Fuyushima from Class 5. I present to you, Class 5 of 2020."

You watched with disinterest as you clapped your hands impatiently for the group of students standing at the front of the hall to disperse and for the graduation to be over and done with quickly.

With every tick of the clock, the tempo of your heartbeat began to pick up and you stole a glance at Ushijima, who was a couple of seats away from you. He was in his graduation attire, his square hat nowhere to be seen on his head and his graduation roll chucked to the side of the foldable chair.

Your line of sight traveled further back, as you noticed the empty chair that was meant for his parents to sit.

With his father residing in California, naturally no one had come to celebrate his graduation with him.

Glancing at your mother who was in the parents' corner and tracing back to the empty one few chairs to the right, you shook your head vigorously and whispered his name.

Among the noise in the hall, you were pleasantly surprised when he looked at you and nodded. Not expecting him to even hear you, your eyes widened and your hand moved on its own, giving him a thumbs-up with a wonky smile plastered on your face.

He looked away for a second and you cringed internally.

Such a goddamn embarrassment, y/n. Great job.

You were still in deep thought, mentally reprimanding yourself when he suddenly turned towards you once again. You swore you saw that slight blush on his face as his gaze met yours.

Looking at him in anticipation, you held your breath in excitement as a small smile cracked away his stoned facade and he raised his hand, seemingly returning the thumbs-up.

"The principal of Shiratorizawa Academy would like to give Ushijima Wakatoshi from 3rd year, Class 3 a special plaque to thank him for all the honor he brought to the academy with his exceptional skills he displayed in his volleyball games."

Ushijima's arm instantly fell limp as all eyes in the hall were on him. You grumbled in response, what great timing.

"Nice Ushijima!" You heard Tendou screech out as he clapped his hands together. Soon, one by one, everyone, including yourself, vigorously clapped your hands together while chanting Ushijima's name, like how you would in his matches.

The room suddenly fell into silence.

Ushijima Wakatoshi, who was anybody but sentimental, had let a tear drip down his face. You watched as he bit his bottom lip, an obvious attempt to stop crying.

You felt so useless, unable to do anything but watch him as he cried in silence. Though they were joyful tears, your heart still tore into pieces the same.

Bile rose up your throat as your vision clouded up. The first tear broke free and you sniffled. It was horrifyingly loud and soon pairs of eyes were peeking over at your direction.

"Y-y/n, please don't cry! I didn't want to cry yet-" Your classmate sitting next to you shook your arm, desperately trying to get your tears to stop. However, her voice cracked amidst her sentence and she fell into silence, and you watched in tears as water began to line her lower eyelid.

As if it were a contactable disease, all the students in the hall, other than the year 2 emcee, were bawling towards the end of the ceremony. Bittersweet feelings bloomed inside your chest, slowly eating you up.

You were really going to miss this school. Shiratorizawa Academy really had taught you a lot of things, not just basic subjects off the school. It brought you to your first high school crush, and taught you what volleyball really meant.

It wasn't just a club, or just a sport. It was the beautiful chemistry between all the players in the team that made Shiratorizawa's volleyball team that great. Of course, Ushijima was the ace, and was insanely good at it. However, he didn't make up the team.

Without Eita or Shirabu setting for him, he was nothing but a fish out of water. No amount of skill could ever let him spike as well as he did. Without Tendou, he wouldn't be the Ushijima he was today. There wouldn't be anyone who was always up in Ushijima's face, Ushijima might not even have a best friend.

It was each of them that made it possible. The single gears that fell into place perfectly, those that spun so well, was because of all their effort put into volleyball, and the unbreakable friendship they bond.

There were so many moments where their great play has had you in tears, shrieks of joy or even great anxiety. It was alright, even if they lost. After all, they had played together, and it just showed how humanly they were.

No victory is determined right from the start just because of your pride or score record. And that was alright.

Such undesirable, indescribable feelings gripped you as you sat rooted in your seat, blinking away the rapid tears that were staining your graduation gown.

Ushijima shakily made his way to the stage and firmly shook the principal's hand, before receiving his well-deserved plaque. The principal motioned him to the podium and he tapped on the microphone, not even flinching one bit as a screech shot off the speaker.

He then bowed, and all you could see was his luscious brown locks. As he got up, he cleared his throat and hoarsely spoke into the microphone.

"Thank you for your support. I will continue to make Shiratorizawa proud and uphold the school's name."

Brusque but meaningful; Ushijima described in three beautiful words.

That marked the end of the graduation ceremony as Ushijima stepped off the stage. You shot up from your seat, tightly gripping on to your scroll and holding your graduation cap in place. Making your way to Ushijima, you realized that he was getting further and further away from you. There was no sea to part just for you.

Watching him go back to class alone in disdain, you felt a tap behind your shoulder. It was the same girl that sat next to you during the ceremony.

"Y/n! Let's go take some photos with the girls to commemorate our special day!"

You were about to decline, when reality struck you. Today might have been the last time you were about to see your high school classmates. Ushijima could wait for now.

So, you willingly let yourself be dragged away by your friend for a small photoshoot in class. When you went back to class, Ushijima wasn't there anymore.

Strong uncertainty began swirling inside of you at the thought of Ushijima blindly waiting for you and you sent him a quick text, just to make yourself feel better.

'hey ushi! i’ll be a little late since the girls and i are going to take photos together to celebrate our special day tgt :-) i hope you don’t mind waiting!’

Within a minute, your phone buzzed from the notification of his reply.

'Sure, y/n. Take your time.’

'Thank you so much Ushiii! ;)'

The moment you hit send, you groaned at the winky face you had accidentally sent to him. It was supposed to be a colon, but it turned into a semicolon instead.

But with the worrying thoughts you previously had long gone, you made your way between two of your classmates’ arms and linked them together with yours, posing for the picture with wide smiles on all your faces.

After almost ten minutes of nonstop smiles, you all finally had enough and you left the classroom, after changing out from your graduation attire, with some of the girls yelling a quick goodbye from behind you.

Neither of you were really going to cry; the class had already planned for several meet-ups during the upcoming holidays after all.

You made a mad rush to the school’s entrance to see Ushijima’s well built figure standing there, waiting for you. The smile was once again evident on your face as you jogged there, yelling his name in the process.

This was it. It was now or never.

"Ushijima! M-may I please have the second button of your uniform...?” You stopped in your tracks and in your sentence as you noticed the second button from his uniform gone, and to find it replaced with nothing but fabric and some leftover thread.

Of course. Ushijima and you were just friends after all. There really was going to be nothing happening between the two of you.

"Ah- you want that? A classmate of ours came up to me in private and asked for it, so I gave it to her. I’m sorry y/n.”

Your mouth fell open like a fish that was out of water. You had already seen it coming, but it didn’t mean that it wouldn’t hurt. In fact, it was far worse from just ‘hurt’. It was as if a thousand knives pierced through your body and was being pulled out slowly.

You swallowed the lump in your throat and you were about to tell Ushijima that everything was alright. But you knew, deep down, you weren’t. You were slowly rotting inside, and all for a stupid high school love.

Letting out a dark chuckle, you looked at Ushijima once more with that loving undertone you always had when your attention was on him.

You were trying to mentally prepare yourself to let go of those unrequited feelings you had for him.

One, two, three.

And away those feelings went.

Or at least, you ardently told yourself. Maybe the more you emphasized that thought, the quicker it’d go away.

Letting out a shaky breath, you looked at him, hoping that you’d appear looking as a determined person in his eyes.

"Eeh...? What do we have over here? Y/n asking for Ushiwaka's second button? Hmm... Let's see here... But the second button is gone? Oh man, y/n, looks like your confession was rejected after all!"

"T-tendou?"

You whispered as Tendou appeared from behind you, and looked at Ushijima's once neatly sewed on button.

"C-confession?"

Ushijima looked stunned, as a weird expression overtook his usual expressionless features. His mouth shaped almost into a square and his eyebrow raised in confusion.

"Ushiwaka, do you really not know what it means when you give away your second button? It means you accept her love confession bro."

Tendou rubbed his temples and let out a long sigh.

"Oh. Then I didn't mean to give it to her."

A small flicker of hope was lit inside you, and you looked at him with expectancy, hoping he'd say the words you wished fervently for him to say.

"Ushiwaka... How idiotic are you, really? Don't you think you have a bigger issue here to solve?"

Tendou said, nodding at your direction. Thank god for Tendou being there, you knew you wouldn't like how it'd end if he wasn't around.

No, it's fine Tendou! It was pretty stupid of me anyways! I was just trying-"

"I wouldn't mind giving it to you y/n, well if I still had it, of course."

"But you don't."

"But I don't."

You both said at the same time, and your eyes met in an unbreakable stare. You heart your heart contracting and releasing more violently than ever as you gazed into his beautiful orbs.

It was as if time had stopped just for the two of you and everything else faded away. You were looking at him, and he was too.

"Ugh, gross. Get a room you two." Tendou stuck his tongue out, which was incredibly childish, and squeezed his eyes together and Ushijima let out a slight chuckle.

The rasp to the chuckle instantly got to you, and colored your ears pink as the sound vibrated in your eardrums.

So, uh, y/n. Can I take you out?"

Without thinking, you answered.

"Like on a date?"

"No, he's going to take you out with one of his powerful spikes. Of course he's taking you out on a date you idiot! Well, at least that's one thing you two share in common."

Both you and Ushijima gave him a pointed look and you moved towards Tendou to give him a gentle push on the head.

"Tendou is salty that he doesn't have a girlfriend yet, isn't he? Come on, stop acting as if you aren't jealous!"

"Don't touch me! I'm not jealous, you are!" Tendou yelled out as he began to run away from you, and you gave chase slightly later than him.

The nerve-wracking moment was long gone; replaced by these blissful moments you wished that would last forever.

Now that you and Ushijima were in a relationship, everything fell into place. With you gleefully chasing after Tendou and Ushijima watching with an exasperated sigh, it was perfect.

That was the most perfect way to end your high school life. Way more perfect than you could ever imagine.

Taglist: @bnha-homeroom, @sushij1ma and @shiggywiggy

Message me to be added in here!

#haikyuu #haikyuu fic #haikyuu!!#ushijima wakatoshi x reader #ushijima wakatoshi

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hanscom · 4 years

Note

reddie enemies to lovers

(I keep trying to convince myself to finish this, but it hasn’t happened yet and it’s been over a year since I started it. So here, have some hockey enemies to friends nonsense.

Fair warning: this is the same game as we all know and love, but the ins and outs of professional hockey detailed here are made up. I don’t know the specifics about what goes on off the ice, okay? Correct me if you must, but I highly encourage you to just embrace the fact that I don’t know what the fuck I’m talking about.

Also, I love you all, still and forever. Thanks for following me even after all this time.)

Pairing: Richie Tozier/Eddie Kaspbrak Rating: T Word count: 2,948

It’s cold in the arena.

It’s worse, down on the ice. The air is sharp and stinging on his face, in his lungs. His skates are steady under his feet. The lights are blazing overhead. He can’t smell much except the sweaty inside of his helmet, but he imagines it smells like popcorn and hoppy beer. It smells like game day. It smells like home.

Richie doesn’t think there could be anything better than this.

He’s skating backwards around the rink, gliding fast across the freshly buffed ice, content in the knowledge that no one is going to run into him. His team has gotten pretty good at working around him. They’re starting to become a pretty effortless unit, for the most part. It’s something Richie is pretty fucking proud of.

He whooshes past Ben and around one of the rookies, shouting joyful nonsense that echoes off the ice. They yell back at him, but he can’t make out the words over the sound of his skates and the blood rushing in his ears.

And then Stan skates out from the tunnel and into his way. Richie twists fast to the side, digging down, slowing to a quick stop. Ice sprays up under his blades. Stan, unimpressed as always, doesn’t move. “Are you done showing off?” he asks, his mouthguard hanging from his helmet. The only time he ever takes it out on the ice is to give Richie a hard time.

“What’s that?” Richie says. “I can’t hear you from down there.”

Stan is the smallest guy on the team. He’s almost a solid foot shorter than Richie, and he’s constantly sore as fuck about it. Richie doesn’t get it. If Stan were any bigger, any less quick on his feet, he wouldn’t be half the player he is. Stan’s a winger. His entire hockey career revolves around being fast. And, anyway, Richie’s kind of big for a centerman, but you don’t hear him bitching about it.

They’re close to the goal. Mike is standing there in the crease, suited up, his hulking equipment making him look massive. “Are we really doing this again?” he calls, but he’s laughing about it.

Richie digs his skates in, gliding an easy circle around the goal. “We sure are,” he says, grinning. “You know Stan plays a better game when he’s pissed off.”

“I could play a better game than you in a coma,” Stan shouts. His face is red, some combination of cold air and actual anger. Stan’s normally a pretty level-headed guy, but Richie gets under his skin, shakes him up, makes him mad. His game has gotten a thousand times more aggressive since they met. Bill sometimes jokes about putting him on defense, but he never will. Stan as Richie’s left wing is pretty much the only reason the Portland Pioneers ever score.

It’s not that their right wing is bad, exactly. He’s just… not good. Richie can say that. He’s not the captain, like Bill. He’s not even an alternate, like Stan and Ben. He doesn’t have to be diplomatic. He doesn’t have to play nice. Hockey’s not a nice sport. Hockey’s about being fast and smart and violent. Right winger Patrick Hockstetter might be mean as hell, but he’s also slow as fuck and dumb as a box of rocks. Richie can work with a lot of things, but he can’t fix stupid.

But Richie’s trying not to think about it. He doesn’t need to go into the game expecting Patrick to fuck it up for them (again). It’s bad luck. And Albany’s a good team. Richie has to focus if he’s going to pull this one out.

—

The Pioneers lose in overtime, which is devastating. Losing always sucks, but it’s even worse, watching Albany celebrate on their ice.

Afterward, the locker room is quiet for a long time, aside from the five minutes Coach spends yelling at them for their admittedly awful performance. When he retreats back to his office, the team slowly strips out of their equipment, made sluggish by defeat. They’re all tired. Richie is already starting to ache, his body finally registering all the time he spent up against the boards. Bill and Ben are in even worse shape. Both of them already have bruises blooming across their ribs, across their backs. Albany played rough. The Pioneers haven’t had to fight that dirty in a long time. It makes the loss feel even worse, somehow.

Richie has just finished dragging on his street clothes when Bill finally speaks up. He has changed into the full three-piece suit he wears to impress the media circus waiting outside for him, and his hair is still damp from the shower. He looks sort of ridiculous, standing there in full monkey costume in front of the team, who are all in various states of undress. But he’s still the captain, so when Bill tells them to listen up, they do.

“You guys played really hard tonight,” he says. He’s trying to sound light-hearted, uplifting, but Richie has known him for a long time now. He’s just as crushed by the loss as everyone else — probably more so. There’s a small waver in his voice that says it all. “I know this isn’t the outcome we wanted, but that doesn’t change how well you all played.”

Richie looks down. It’s sort of worse, knowing they did well but lost anyway. They gave it their all, but it wasn’t good enough. It fucking sucks. Richie sort of wants to punch something. He sort of wants to sleep for a few days straight.

He really, really, really wants a right winger who can shoot a decent shot.

It’s not a very charitable thought. Patrick has played worse games than this one. But Richie’s too tired to play nice, and he can’t stop replaying all the shots they missed, all the times he was open and so was the goal but the puck was nowhere to be found and neither was Patrick.

Richie thinks, without meaning to, about Albany’s right winger. Thinks about the way he had sped across the ice, faster than Richie, faster even than Stan. He’d played a good game. A damn good game. Richie sort of really hates him for it, which isn’t fair. It’s not that guy’s fault Richie doesn’t have a solid line. But he is most of the reason Albany scored and scored and scored again, so Richie reserves the right to hate him, just a little.

Stan and Mike ask him out for a drink, but he declines. He wouldn’t be good company, and besides, he’s beat. So he bids them goodbye and leaves out the back, ball cap pulled low over his eyes to hopefully deter anyone from recognizing him. It works. He gets home without incident, makes himself a late dinner, and flips on the TV to watch a few highlights, because he’s an obsessive masochist. Pittsburgh beats Chicago, then Nashville loses to Dallas, and then he’s watching himself skate furiously down the length of the Pioneers’ rink. He groans, but doesn’t fumble for the remote. Helplessly, hopelessly, he watches Patrick lag behind. He watches Albany’s defense wrestle the puck away without much of a fight. He watches that tiny fucking demon of a right winger swoop in, taking control of the puck with an ease Richie can’t help but admire. God, the guy’s good.

The announcers call him Eddie Kaspbrak. The name sounds familiar, in the way that all good players sound familiar. Richie can only watch so many highlights in a night without picking up on a few things, and this is clearly not the first beautiful pass Kaspbrak has ever made. Richie makes a face and finally shuts the television off. He doesn’t need to relive Kaspbrak’s seamless pass to center, that perfect shot down the crease, the way Mike’s knee guards slapped to the ice a split-second too late. It was hard enough to watch in real time.

One day, he’s going to have a right wing like Kaspbrak, who can keep up and knows how to bank a shot. But today isn’t that day, so he gives up and goes to bed, upset and pissed off and stoking his quiet, irrational grudge against Eddie Kaspbrak.

—

Trade negotiations roll around. Richie tries not to worry about it, but he does. Everyone does.

In the end, it’s Patrick. Which isn’t surprising, exactly, but feels so much like everything Richie has ever wanted that it scares him. He finds himself waiting for the other shoe to drop.

In late February, two weeks before the trade deadline, it does. Bill makes the announcement after a rough, sweaty afternoon practice. Richie is tired as fuck, still breathing heavy, but all the air jams up in his throat when Bill breaks the news.

The Portland Pioneers have acquired Eddie Kaspbrak.

—

Kaspbrak, in person and without all his gear, is even smaller than he looks on the ice.

He’s younger-looking than Richie expects. They’re the same age, but Richie has taken a few good hits over the years that have knocked his face a little out of whack. He has a crooked nose, twisted teeth. The entire left side of his jaw had to be painstakingly rebuilt three years ago when he took a puck to the face, which left his smile sort of lopsided.

Eddie doesn’t look like he’s ever taken a hit. He has a smooth, even face. Nice teeth. He’s good-looking, is all Richie’s saying. Richie didn’t expect it. He’s not sure why it catches him off-guard.

They meet for the first time off the ice the day the Pioneers are scheduled to play Carolina. Morning skate is optional, but Richie drags himself in anyway because Bill expects him to, and Richie’s a sucker who doesn’t want to disappoint his captain, even after all this time. It’s not even that early when he stumbles in but he feels bleary and sluggish, pulling on his gear without participating much in the locker talk. Stan tries to rile him up a few times, but gives up fast when Richie refuses to take the bait. Mike nudges him when he walks past. “Rough night?” he asks, grinning like he knows the answer. Richie spent his night with a microwaved pizza and the highlights reel, but that’s nobody’s damn business, so he shrugs.

And then Bill comes out of Coach’s office. The team doesn’t exactly snap to attention whenever he’s around, but the chatter dies down to a dull murmur. Especially when someone follows him out.

Kaspbrak is wearing street clothes — sneakers, jeans, a fucking polo shirt. Richie wonders if that’s the sort of thing he always wears or if he dressed up for them. He looks more comfortable than he probably should, standing in front of a group of strangers who, up until this point, have only known him as an opponent. He’s smiling. He is just — really good-looking. Richie is sort of hung up on it.

“This,” Bill announces, “is Eddie. He’s going to practice with us this morning.”

The season hasn’t even officially ended. Patrick got pulled from the roster when the trade was announced, but he’s still around. His locker’s not even empty. Richie doesn’t like the guy or anything, but that has to be a tough pill to swallow. Richie can’t even imagine what being replaced like that would feel like.

On the other hand, he really, really wants to get out on the ice with Kaspbrak. He wants to see what the guy can do, up close and personal.

It’s a tough thing, being both impressed and annoyed by the sight of someone. It’s made worse by the way Bill stares him down until he manages to force a smile in Eddie’s direction. Kaspbrak grins back at him, easy. His teeth are stupidly perfect. None of them are chipped or anything. Richie can’t remember the last time he met a hockey player with a perfect face. Something about it freaks him out.

Bill claps Eddie on the shoulder. “Welcome to the team,” he says. Most of the guys echo the sentiment. Richie mumbles something that sounds close enough and finishes lacing up his skates.

He doesn’t have to play nice with Kaspbrak. He just has to play well with Kaspbrak. There’s a big difference, and Richie is clinging stubbornly to it.

—

The thing is, Kaspbrak is really fucking good.

Richie knew. Of course he knew. He hardly ever lets the losses get to him, because God knows there have been too many to remember them all over the years, but he’s been hung up on the Albany game for months now. He’s watched the playback more than once, and has most of Albany’s season saved to his DVR.

But it’s different in person. Kaspbrak is so fast. So steady on his feet. Richie hasn’t been impressed by something as simple as skating since he was a kid, but the way Kaspbrak does it shakes him up. The guy skates like a dream. Richie is so jealous, and so impressed, and so fucking confused. He’s spent the better part of the season hating this guy, and now he’s here, gliding around Richie in wide circles, lapping Bill and Ben and even Stan, looking like maybe he’s not even making much of an effort.

Morning skate is easy, most of the time. Everyone wants to be at their best for that night’s game, and half the team didn’t even show. But Eddie throws the dynamic off, makes them all a little hot and hungry for some actual play, and before Richie knows it, Mike and his rookie are guarding opposing nets and Richie’s facing off with Bill, staring at him through the grate of his helmet, his mouthguard clenched between his teeth. It’s not a real scrimmage. They don’t have enough players to run a real game. But Richie doesn’t care, because Stan volunteered as Bill’s winger, which left Kaspbrak all for Richie. Richie can feel him, on his right, just outside the face-off circle. Richie has this weird, sudden urge to look back at him, but then the puck is on the ground and there’s no time.

Bill is a vicious center. He’s not as fast as Richie, but he’s stronger. There’s a reason he plays defense. His body is one solid line of muscle, and he’s not afraid of using it. He shoulder-checks Richie, almost knocks him off balance with the force of it, but Richie bares his teeth and refuses to give up ground. Bill is probably a better player than Richie is in the long run, but Richie is the best center the team has ever had. He wrestles the puck out of Bill’s reach and bears down on the ice, shooting across the rink. Eddie is ahead of him. Richie hasn’t had a winger faster than him in so long he almost forgets to make the pass.

Eddie doesn’t hesitate. He moves like a blur, so fast it’s hard to keep track of his stick against the puck, driving it effortlessly forward. Mike is braced in the crease, his big body held wide, but he’s just not quick enough. Eddie comes at him from the side, bent down, stick jumping from one side of the puck to the other. And then it’s over. One second, he’s barreling down the rink, and the next, the puck is in the net — a perfect backhand shot.

It’s just practice. There’s no cheering, no booming announcement, no music. But Richie feels the same way he always does, his pulse loud in his ears, his heart tight in his chest.

“Kaspbrak!” he roars. “You son of a bitch!”

Eddie has the kind of smile that could melt the ice. He looks so pleased, so proud. Richie skates to him and throws an arm around his shoulder, smacking his helmet.

“We went easy on you!” Stan shouts, because he’s a sore loser.

“You kidding?” Richie yells back. “You couldn’t have caught him if you tried!”

Eddie’s shoulders shake. Richie leans into him, grinning, thrilled beyond measure. They drift a little on the ice, aimless, anchored together.

“It won’t happen again,” Bill says. He’s a competitive motherfucker, which makes him a great player and an even better captain. It won’t be easy, getting the puck away from him again.

Eddie grins up at Richie like maybe he’s up for the challenge.

—

Eddie scores two more times. He insists that they don’t call it a hat trick, considering it’s just practice and he’s scared of jinxing it. Richie doesn’t care what they call it. All he knows is Eddie scored three fucking times, and he assisted all of them. He doesn’t even mind that he wasn’t the one to make the shots. It’s better, almost, watching Eddie do it.

Bill lets morning skate go longer than normal, probably hoping to pull out a single goal, but after awhile he finally calls them off the ice. Richie is dripping with sweat when he peels himself out of his equipment. He didn’t realize how hard he’d been working. It hadn’t felt like much, being out there on the ice, falling into Eddie’s rhythm, into his gravity.

Eddie hangs back while everyone files out, looking around like maybe he’s still taking everything in. His hair is wet from the shower and his face is flushed. Richie nudges him on his way out. “Sure you can’t play with us tonight?” he asks. It’s not possible, but it makes Eddie beam.

“Won’t be long,” Eddie assures him.

Richie doesn’t say so, but he can’t fucking wait.

#reddie #it fic #sometimes i write things

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