not everyone was made to like you! you cannot convince people to like you, no matter how much dark femininity and sigma grindset and tiktok manipulator tricks you harness! even by going into interactions with the intent of forcing them to like you is not the right approach. all you can do is be patient, and kind, and open, and let people in when they want to. jesus
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I'm not having much luck on tiktok so I'm reposting/putting poetry here instead...
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♡₊˚✧ maybe I should kill him
he would be mine forever ₊♡₊˚✧
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I remember when I was younger going to all my friends houses, their family being so different from mine.
They didn’t need to ask for food, and double check from their dad they can have it so they wouldn’t get into trouble.
Their dad didn’t refuse to come into the living room because they were there, they didn’t get sent to their room just because he didn’t want them in the same one.
They were allowed to have sleepovers, friends over whenever they wanted, their mom wasn’t the one who said ‘I didn’t want anyone to see what we were going through’ it was mine.
And their dad never laid a hand on them, unless kind.
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i craved for someone to hold me but all i got was rotting swamp in my bowl and i drank it i drank every last sleazing drop hoping that maybe for one second it would bring me love but all it gave me was a rotting stomach and it burrows in me, the rot falls through my throat and past my clavicle and through my broken cracking ribs and through my pelvic bone where it rests and rots and spreads through my body spreading through my lungs and through my legs and through my arms and through my veins and through my brain until i am nothing but swamp rot and dandelion flowers and i love everyone who visits my bog but not a single visitor loved me.
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how to be loved
you have to love others.
you have to allow yourself to be loved. this means you have to open yourself for the person trying to love you. you can't just run away. you can't just close yourself off. you have to be brave.
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in this new year I want you to be alright. I hope you move out. I hope you have enough money to feel safe. I hope you abandon shame and forgive yourself. I hope you get enough sleep and some good news. I hope you laugh a lot and the heaviness of the world eases a bit. I wish you to be alright.
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I shouldn't feel bad for treating her how's she's been treating me, but I do, I really do, and it sucks becuz I love her so much and it feels like she doesn't give a single shit about me.
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