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tmntxthings · 2 years

Note

Haiiii! I was just wondering if you could do rise!turtles x gn!reader who has trouble eating? Like they don’t have an eating disorder, their body just doesn’t like to have food in it and makes them feel sick, so they take medicine to help them eat? Maybe it��s how the boys react to finding this out?

Food Issues

author’s note: lovely anon thank you for requesting and sorry for the wait <3 hopefully this is what you were thinking of c: this one hit a little close to my heart

warnings: eating issues, fluff, angst, comfort, unedited

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Raphael

Raph had kicked everyone out of the lair that night (except for dad ofc) because tonight was date night and Raph had been cooking up an idea, quite literally cooking hehe, he was fixing you an absolute bangin’ meal (and no it’s not pizza!)

He had searched up a whole bunch of date night menus and settled for something on the easier side since he wasn’t super confident in his cutlery skills. Chicken Alfredo pasta was on the menu tonight at the lair and it was finally done! Raph set the table, poured some soda in glasses and also took out some water too (options!)

Raph couldn’t stop his smile as he heard you call out, “Raph?” He looked back at the set table, he had chosen to sit the two of you closer together rather than across the table like the movies. Plates full of pasta! It all looked perfect, “Hey! I’m coming,” he said as he went to you

You were beautiful everyday but today in particular Raph noticed how much effort you had put into yourself for date night, you smiled warmly at him, your hair looked so soft, as it framed your face, you were glowing in a stunning outfit and Raph pulled you in for a hug, happy to see you

“You’re taking my breath away,” Raph said twirling you in a circle as he hugged you tight, you blushed “you do the same!” You said as you hugged him back just as tightly, “so date night?” you asked as he set you back on your feet

“Yes! I’ve got a bunch of stuff prepared,” Raph beamed as he took your hand and led you to the table, “I made us a meal first, then we can do whatever you want! I’ve got movies or games, or anything else you can think of!” he was so excited as he pulled out your chair for you, “thank you” you smiled as he sat down next to you

“Wow Raph! This looks amazing!” And it really did, your heart panged knowing you wouldn’t be able to eat all of this. Much less it would probably be a couple of bites since you hadn’t even thought to take your medicine today, you were in such a rush once you looked at how little time you had left after getting dressed and doing you hair, you’d spent about 2 hours in the shower!

Raph smiled at your compliment and started to dig in, he hoped it tasted as good as it looked and to him nothing seemed out of the ordinary, he felt relief he really didn’t want to mess up date night, the conversation flowed as Raph ate, and you pushed the food around with your fork, taking occasional bites hoping Raph wouldn’t notice

But since Raph had cooked this meal he was very much aware that you weren’t eating, “is it not good?” he sighed putting his fork down, he had cleaned his plate and you still had more than half of the portion of pasta he had put on your plate, “oh no Raph, that’s not it at all, your pasta is really good,” you tried reassuring him but he didn’t believe you, even as you forced another bite down

“I’m sorry I just, I’m not hungry… I didn’t take my meds before I left,” you admitted to him and now he looked a little concerned, “what do you mean Y/n?” You put the fork down and turned to him, “I don’t really eat much, so when I do I need to take this medicine or else I get really sick” and as soon as you said the word a wave of nausea rolled through you. You shot up to your feet, “Raph” desperation in your eyes, “I’ll be right back, I’m really sorry”

You held your hand to your mouth as you booked it to the nearest bathroom, almost not making it as you gagged into your hand, then slumping down to your knees as you held the toilet bowl and puked the few bites of alfredo you had eaten, tears streaming down your face, you had totally ruined date night and hurt Raph’s feelings on top of that!

You heard a soft knock on the door before Raph entered the bathroom and another onslaught of puking came up, he held your hair back and rubbed circles on your back, trying to soothe you, “Y/n you could’ve told me, I wouldn’t have felt bad! Especially now since the consequence is you hurting,” the both of you stayed in the bathroom for a while, until the puking finally subsided and you were trembling with dried tear stains down you cheeks

“I’m sorry,” you said after you had rinsed your mouth out with water and brushed your teeth (yes you had a spare toothbrush at the lair) “Nothing to apologize for Y/n, I just want you feeling better,” Raph hadn’t known anything about your eating issues and once you had told him, all those other times of hanging out and you rarely eating clicked, it seemed so obvious now

“Do you wanna go lay on the couch and watch movies?” he asked, holding your hand and smiling softly down at you, “I’d love that,” you nodded and the two of you cuddled up watching Lou Jitsu

Leonardo

“Say what?” Leo asked, needing a repeat of all of what you had just said, you groaned of course he’d make you repeat everything, “I’m not feeling so good today, but it’s not a big deal you don’t need to come and check on me,” you said into the phone. It was silent, “hmmm I think I shall come over, to help in your hour of need!”

“Leo, did you not just hear me?! I said-“ Leo cut you off and you groaned inwardly, “yes yes I know, but wouldn’t you feel way better way faster if your boyfriend was there taking care of you?” He didn’t know why he had to spell this out to you, he was coming and that was final! Of course he’d be there even if it was some crazy bad sickness

“Okay you stubborn blue turtle!” You quipped not even knowing why you dared try to stop him in the first place, once he got an idea, Leo was a force to be reckoned with, an unstoppable train wreck, “do you want me to bring anything in particular? what exactly is wrong?” his voice went serious towards the end, “it’s just my stomach,” you tried to sound light but Leo replied, “isn’t the stomach like a second brain or something?!” he wondered how much truth you were telling him and if he should be more worried

“I’ll be there soon,” Leo said in a hurry and promptly hung up. You fell back in your bed, you had been spewing up your guts all morning and when Leo had called wanting to go out and do something you had to say no, to which he whined and demanded for a good reason as to why, to which well it was already stated previously… thankfully the nausea had passed but your stomach was cramping and you knew you were dehydrated

“This is the worst,” you said feeling emotional as tears welled up in your eyes, sometimes you wished life was simpler, that you could eat whatever you wanted without consequences and didn’t have to constantly think about when your next refill of medicine would be ready, you blew out a breath telling yourself not to cry, it would be your luck that Leo would burst through the door the second the tears started falling

“Alright I’ve got Jupiter Jim and Lou Jitsu, what do ya wanna watch first?” It was crazy how you just knew he would barge in as soon as you had thought of the blue devil, you smiled as you sat up on your elbows looking at him, arms full of movies. “You pick,” and so he had Jupiter Jim Saves the Galaxy 4 in and running in no time

He got into bed with you, lying back on his shell as his arms went back, one behind his head, and the other pulling you in close. You followed suit snuggling into his side and making his heart melt into goo. When the first movie ended, neither of you got up when the credits started rolling and Leo asked, “do you know why your stomach hurts?”

He was peering down at you and you were looking up at him through your lashes, “yes..” you said softly when you didn’t continue Leo waited, “i ate something awhile ago and it didn’t agree with me, but I’m used to it” you sighed

He patted your tummy gently, “that sucks” and he looked so sad while saying it but you stifled a laugh, his word choice was always so straightforward, “yeah it really does” still trying to keep it together, you shook your head at him before sliding out of bed

“What I meant to say was..” Leo said watching you go to the tv, but you waved your hand telling him it was alright, “I know what you meant,” you gave him a smile then turned back to the movie selection.

“Alright you had your movie now my turn but I’ll be nice and let you choose out of my two options,” Leo smirked waiting for his two choices, though if he was a betting turtle… “let me guess,” he said as you simultaneously said “twilight.” Leo threw up his hands he had just known that was your first pick. Then you continued on your own “or sonic the hedgehog?” Leo thought for a split second “too easy, BLUE DEVIL!”

Donatello

Donnie knew something was up with you, because it just didn’t seem possible to him that you had only eaten one meal together in the entire span of your relationship which was 6 months 21 days 7 hours and 8 seconds.. 9.. 10 well you get the point, the two of you were going strong. But only a one, singular time you ate?

Yes, according to his calculations he should’ve seen you eat something 3 out of the 6 months at least, this seemed to be a big staple in relationships, well the internet said so. Donnie spun around in his chair thinking a mile a minute. He wondered if perhaps you could be embarrassed to eat in front of him, that seemed to be legit because a lot of people anonymously confided to that on the wide web.

But Donatello had continued to do research on this because first of all he didn’t like having only one option, six more and he’d start feeling like he was getting somewhere, by the third he came across illnesses or more along the line of stomach issues, he frowned why did he have a sinking feeling… maybe it was just the thought of thinking that this could possibly be true and that made Donnie sad

Yeah that was it, just the possibility because surely…hopefully you didn’t suffer from this, he wouldn’t wish it on anyone, and for you, he winced now he needed to know the remedies, just in case of a worse case scenario. Donnie stopped spinning, and continued researching.

“Y/n?” Donnie said quietly into his phone, “Heyy Dee, I just finished up some studying and was about to head over!” Well he could wait til you got here, it was probably a conversation better in person. “Okay sounds great,” though to you Donnie sounded far off, like he hadn’t really heard what you said

“You okay Donnie?” and he blinked, gripping the phone tighter, “just contemplating some things,” he managed to say, he predicted that he was gonna have to spill over the phone rather than what he wanted to do, wait for your arrival to go down on his knees and ask a million questions and then comfort you with a million solutions

“Contemplating what?” You became very serious because you had a feeling something was wrong, “what’s going on Donnie?” the seconds of silence broke as Donnie sighed into the phone, “Y/n, I’d much rather have this conversation in person but I think I’ve made the situation seem a lot more dire than it really should be”

You listened intently, as Donnie kept going, he was on a roll, in a monologue, “I was doing some research on what couples usually do together and a lot of that had to deal with eating and it made me realize you don’t eat in front of me and then I continued to research as to why some people don’t eat in front of others,”

He took a deep breath and continued, “among many other options one stuck out to me, stomach issues in lament terms, and I think this is the reason why but I want to be wrong, I want you to tell me I’m wrong but even if I’m right I want you to know that they have solutions out there and you don’t have go through this alone!”

The line went quiet as Donnie calmed himself, and went back to steady breathing, “…Y/n?” He winced wondering if he had just metaphorically dived head first off the London bridge. “I’m still here, you just amaze me sometimes” you said warmly now that you had caught up to speed with what was eating at Donnie’s mind. “You’re right, I do have said issues and I already have medicine that helps, it still hurts at times though,”

Donnie smiled in relief no jumping off of bridges, “we can talk about it more when you get here and hopefully with the help of science we can figure out a better solution than the medicine you’re taking,” you smiled tears in your eyes, of course he would do everything in his power to help you the second he found out.

Michelangelo

“Alright!!! Pizza’s here” Mikey hollered but it wasn’t needed because everyone was already waiting at the table. “About time!” Raph complained as he eyed the boxes Mikey was carrying hungrily. “It was a new delivery person, they kept walking back and forth past the alleyway,” Mikey laughed as he placed the boxes on the center of the table.

Everyone was immediately reaching for the first box, opening it up and letting the aroma waft through the lair. “Smells so good,” Mikey’s mouth watered. Grabbing two slices, one for him, one for you before heading further down the table at where you sat.

“Gotcha a slice!” Mikey smiled as he handed you the plate. “Thanks Mikey, though I’m not really hungry” you smiled back at him, he was so kind you thought, always thinking of others.

“But you’ve been at the lair all day today!” Mikey said confused on how you weren’t absolutely starving like he was, like Raph was, like all of them were. You shrugged wanting to move past the topic, you hadn’t thought Mikey would think anything of it because it was your usual excuse!

“When did you last eat?” Mikey asked after swallowing a bite of pizza. He was looking at you with worried eyes. “I had something yesterday..” you admitted softly and by something you drank some water and managed to get down a granola bar.

Mikey was frowning, “don’t humans have to eat three times a day?” and you nodded, he finished off his pizza and thought, “do you not like pizza???” It hurt his heart to say, he couldn’t believe that they had someone out there who didn’t like pizza it was just too good, but maybe that’s why you never ate at the lair, the menu here was mostly different varieties of pizza.

“It’s not that I don’t like it,” you said “I just don’t have the appetite for really anything” you sighed to yourself. You guessed there was no point in lying, Mikey would’ve found out eventually the more the two of you hung out. “That can’t be good!” Mikey’s heart was hurting in a different way now, he couldn’t imagine not ever being hungry

“I get hungry sometimes” you tried to explain, “I just feel awful afterwards and it usually comes right back up..” it was pretty gross to talk about especially at the table with food around, but Mikey listened intently with sad eyes, “is there anything I can do?” he asked wanting to help if possible

Gosh he was so sweet, you smiled, “I can go back to my place and take some medicine that usually helps” Mikey stood wanting to come along, “I’ll go too! I’m pretty sure we’ll need more pizza anyways”

The two of you looked down the table to see four empty boxes, the only slice that had survived was sitting on your plate! You giggled the turtles sure had been hungry, “Yeah” you agreed, “and this time I’ll pay because I wanna get my favorite!”

“You have a favorite pizza?!” Mikey exclaimed, “well yeah when I do get a little peckish I’ll buy a supreme pizza with stuffed crust,” Mikey was licking his lips, “sounds delicious!” and so the two of you left the lair, talking about other favorite foods, Mikey was making a list in his mind, that way he’d always have a least something at the lair you would want to eat

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yandere-daze · 2 years

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Oya oya, it's me again! (At this point, I can be labeled as the oya oya anon)

I wrote this after reading the ask where the player breaks down because of all the affection the idols have for them.

Living in the world of Enstars where 40+ idols are obsessed with you is very exhausting, especially when you are aware of their yandere behavior.

Feeling like you're not alone or being followed (Mayoi, Izumi, Mika), not being able to have a single moment of rest because there's always someone who wants to get your attention by being clingy (Ritsu, Rinne), asking you for a date (Kaoru, Natsume) or just wanting to talk with you (Leo, Wataru)

My introvert battery will die because of them

Home is supposed to be a comfortable and safe place, but when you are aware of everything that is going on around you, being alone is even scarier. You're focused on something (or you have your headphones in your ears) and you hear a sudden noise (hope it's your roommate or your cat/dog if you have one and you don't live in the ES dorms but somewhere else) and start to get scared.

Trying to fall asleep is hard too. What if someone has broken into your house and is watching you? Open your eyes to see if someone is really there or stay in bed under the best armor in the world (your blanket) until morning? (Both choices scare me honestly)

Also pray that you don't get isekaied on your birthday or Valentine's Day....

If it's your birthday, they will all want you to spend it with them. After all, it's a special day, you deserve the best, which also means the best person to spend this wonderful day with, right?

In the case of Valentine's Day, it will be hell. More love and affection than usual. After all, that's what Valentine's Day is all about, and maybe by doing this you'll return the feelings of one of them.

And I feel sorry for the people who work at ES or the other students who have to see this almost every day. Why are all these idols obsessed with the same person who seems to be quite ordinary ?

And sorry if I wrote more than I should have.

Ah I´m so late to answering this, I´m so sorry! But I really really enjoyed reading this, even when I first saw it!🥺

gn reader

tw yandere, obsession, stalking, possessiveness, jealousy

But yes, I agree so much with all of this! My social batteries are also pretty low so I would feel overwhelmed really quickly even in a perfectly normal and sane social setting but then adding on the fact that everyone is strangely fixated on you and honestly speaking quite creepy? That´s just too much, I think I would be fed up after a day or two djnfdlknf

But you also raise another very good point! You certainly wouldn´t feel very safe, even in your own room, simply because you´re aware of the lengths some of these people would go to just to get "close to you" or whatever else stuff they say. You always have to fear that there might be someone secretly watching you ( you´ve stumbled upon Mika when rounding a corner one too many times) and it´s most definitely freaking you out!

Man just thinking about someone potentially standing in my room and watching me sleep is super creepy! I don´t think I could bear to look either

But oh no, birthdays or Valentine´s day would be really scary, now that you mention it!

You probably wouldn´t be safe on any day where one of the idols celebrates their birthday either. I mean it´s their special day and they want to spend it with the person they love the most! Surely you can´t be so cruel as to reject them on their birthday, right? Just for this one day, they won´t let anyone else interrupt their time with you

On your own birthday the power balance might tip a bit more in your favor because it´s *your* day and so you get to order them around as much as you like ( not that they wouldn´t let you on any other day) but they still all secretly ( or not so secretly) hope that you will spend the day with them and no one else. Also if you thought the grand gestures and gifts you got were too much before then you haven´t seen anything yet. On your birthday everyone is going all out to both celebrate the day you were born and to show you just how much they love you!

Also speaking of love: Oh boy, Valentine´s day. Rip

You´ll be showered with gifts and their yandere behaviours will be worse than on any other day. It´s the day of love so now is the time to hopefully win over your heart! They´ll be so charming and attentive and trying to seek you out every single second of the day. You literally won´t be left alone at all, there´s always someone clinging to you or asking you to be their valentine. The rivalry and jealousy is also especially bad on that day because everyone of course wants you to “choose” them. They´re all hoping for a love confession from you but if you´re feeling to shy then they can take the first step and nudge you in the right direction!

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thesuetyouforgot · 8 months

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How would you rank the Pythons on who you would like to hang out with and (give reasons) why?

Okay so I got carried away a bit with my answer... And also ranking them was wayyy harder than I had expected but here we go

6. Terry Gilliam; I'm sure he's actually a really nice and funny person to be around but I just don't feel the urge to hang out with him at all. Neither is he my type nor do I have anything that I would want to ask him/talk to him about

5. Terry Jones; this is a really paradoxic one bc he's actually my fave Python and I adore him and his work so so much but judging from interviews and all, I think we wouldn't really get along in real life. I mean, yes I would have loved to meet him and see what he's like in person but I doubt it would have been an enjoyable time/conversation for either of us.

4. John Cleese; I feel like we barely know what he's like in private and I find it hard to get the measure of him tbh. I think we could have great conversations and could have a good time but I'm just not sure. There are times when I'm really intrigued by him and would love to get to know him but then there are other times when I become kind of put off by him and don't care about him at all. That uncertainty is why he ranks so low

3. Michael Palin; he's my comfort person no.1 and he seems like the most pleasant person to be around ever. I would just love to hang out with him! But at the same time I feel like it would become boring after a while of us hanging out. Because I feel like although he is super friendly and easy to talk to, it would also take a looot of time till he'd really let you into his life.

2. Eric Idle; I adore the vibes he gives off. He just seems to burst with positivity and hanging out with him would surely be an amazing combination of lighthearted fun and extremely interesting and deep conversations. The only reason he doesn't score higher in this ranking is because he is so witty and I'm not, so i feel a bit intimidated by that haha (also Gray is just my spirit animal and needs to be 1. here)

1.(sober) Graham Chapman; we're so similar in many ways and I would absolutely love to spend time with him. We would be unstoppable in terms of doing stupid stuff and joking around but could probably also be really boring/ordinary together (in the eyes of other people). Yeah, I'm sure we would get along quite well and even if not, I'd have a good time anyway just observing and admiring him haha

Thank you so much for the question, it was really fun to think this all through!

#asks #monty python #personal rant #Okay the Michael explanation is pretty stupid but I needed a reason why I'd rank Eric above him in this #yonderghostshistories

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bobbybutterfly · 9 months

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Saki Sanobashi fanart!

I kind of failed this week to post my Stardew Valley fic. The last two chapters are going to need some more work. Chapter four should be coming out tomorow.

Instead enjoy this picture!

TW for the post:

mentions of suicide and bullying

I love fandoms that pop up around stuff like Goncharov where there's practically no original work. I kind of want sometimes that people stop trying to find the Go for a Punch anime. Not because I wouldn't want the anime to be real. From what I heard it sounds fucking awesome. Shoujo Tsubaki is one of my favorite movies of all time. Probably because it reminds me of my favorite book Lolita.

The reason why I want people to stop searching for the anime is that Saki Sanobashi to me is the fanart and fanfiction. Saki Sanobashi can be so many things. But once we would find the anime, it would be one definitive thing.

Do you understand what I'm getting at?

Anyway. Here are some of my personal ideas for the story of Go for a Punch:

Saki (the girl in the picture) is a personification of the bathroom. The bathroom being like a Lovecraftian creature that feasts on people that commit suicide in it. First trapping people that have suicidal thoughts and then having Saki convince them to go through with it. Kind of like the view from half way down. Where you know you're going to die for certain but you're still alive. Maybe Saki is even a comforting presence, helping people to the other side.

The bathroom could be like a purgatory where you end up when you attempt suicide. I remember there's this girl in one of the summaries of the anime that is super optimistic about getting out the bathroom. She could represent life and Saki would represent death. Each of them trying to convince you that she's right with philosophical arguments.

In the first case I imagine that at first you would think Saki is just one of the girls. She then subtally manipulates all the girls into killing themselves leaving her the last one standing. All the bodies dissapear. Saki maybe smiles to herself. Then when the new girl wakes up in the bathroom and Saki pretends like she too just got there. Repeating the whole cycle.

The second case would be far more hopeful. Because some of the girls will get out of the bathroom in the end. Once again it wouldn't ever be said that Saki or the other girl are like supernatural beings. At first you would think that they are just like the other girls, ordinary highschoolers. At the end you would realize that maybe there was something more going on with those two.

In both cases the bathroom would be like a school one. And all the girls would be in a school uniform. Yeah. In the original they are suposed because anime got to anime. But in my versions the girls would committ suicide because of school bullying so the school thing is pretty importaint. They would also be from diffrent schools, so they wouldn't know each other before the bathroom. Maybe at the end of the second case two girls that survive by becoming friends end up meeting in the real world.

It's really late where I am. So I got to end this post quick. I don't feel like writting a fanfiction based off these ideas at the moment. For the first time in my life really I'm getting the help I need and I don't want to screw up my relatively stable mind thinking about the philosophy of suicide. Maybe when I'm going to feel better. But when I feel better then I tend to gravitate to happier subject matter.

Ither case, feel free to use my ideas for your own work. Please message me if you do because I would like to read it. I might even do some original art for it if I like it.

And don't forget to credit me!!!!

Bobby out!

#fanart #my art #digital art #procreate #digital painting #saki sanobashi #saki sanobashi fanart #fan theory #story suggestion #story ideas

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sissytobitch10seconds · 10 months

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All the Things Yet to Come Are the Things That Have Passed

Fandom: The Umbrella Academy

Summary: Viktor wished it could be Five with his whole heart and soul, but he missed his siblings so dearly that he doesn't really mind that it's them.

Warnings: Pregnancy, pregnant trans character, medical inaccuracies, starved characters, and general PTSD

Word Count: 6,103

Ship(s): Five Hargreeves/Viktor Hargreeves

Archive link!

A/N: It's the second to last fic! This is another small step forward in their healing process so while not a ton of stuff happens here it was very cathartic for me to write. While I will admit that I do enjoy putting my characters in really hard Situations, I love writing them healing for it almost as much. Thank you all for reading, I appreciate it so much! Stay sissy and bitchy everyone <3

Days were a lot easier to count when he was no longer trapped inside of the apocalypse. Viktor was still confined to a single room for the time being since Grace didn’t know what would happen if he tried to venture from the bed, but he felt safe there so he wasn’t complaining. He liked being able to tilt his head up and see not only his own vitals, but that of his baby. He could also turn to the side and see that Five was still there and still very much alive and okay. He was recovering slowly as well, which only made sense given how much of his power he had used to get them back to where they could really have a life.

It was nice to finally have some time to rest in a place that was clean and well-kept after living in the apocalypse for years on end. He’d even been able to have a bath with running, warm water and a washcloth that wasn’t threadbare and falling apart. He didn’t remember the last time that he had been fully submerged in water instead of just cleaning what needed to be.

Something that he had noticed on the harder nights when he was unable to sleep was that the house was a lot louder than he thought it was as a child. Five had helped him uncover his powers and learn how to use them when they first ended up in the wasteland, but it had just been them when they were there. Now Viktor was able to compare what it was like to hear things where he previously couldn’t before. The house ached and groaned as the wind pushed against the sides, tree branches scraping against the windows on the third floor and attic, the sound of people sleeping and mumbling as they drifted off.

When he was a child he had always been able to hear more than the standard person did but he had never been around actual ordinary people to be able to tell that. He thought that he had just had a talent for music even if he had no powers, but as it turned out, the medicine that Reginald had given him what just stunting his powers back enough that he wasn’t able to hear every minute detail like he could now. He had excelled when he was playing the violin because he was able to pick up on the tiny changes that a lot of other people didn’t, though.

Being back in the house that he had grown up in was both comforting and disconcerting. For a while, he had assumed that it wasn’t something that was ever going to happen for him and Five. They had been trying to so long to get back to a place where they belonged but to no avail. Now they were back, somewhere where it was safe for them to grow their little family, and it felt surreal.

The past couple of days had been very quiet as Grace tried to make sure that he slept as much as possible. She was very dedicated to the idea that rest like that was what was going to help both him and Five be able to recuperate rom the massive power dump that they had. He was inclined to believe her since she had been caring for seven super powered children since they were all four.

Every day he began to feel better and brighter, like the life was being dripped back into him through the IV in his arm and the feeding tube down his throat. He was uncomfortable because of it and the lack of movement that his body was unused to, but overall it was a wonderful thing to watch himself get better.

Eight days after his arrival, Luther knocked on the door to the infirmary and then swayed back and forth nervously. Viktor pried open his eyes from where he had been pretending to sleep to appease Grace. “You can come in, you know. I get that we look kind of scary after everything that we’ve been through but Five and I don’t bite,” he glanced over to his husband as he said that. Five had both used more of his powers and wasn’t at risk when being put under by a sedative, so he had been out cold since they had gotten back. Grace had explained that a sedative strong enough to keep Viktor asleep would affect the baby, which was something none of them wanted to risk.

“I just didn’t want to disturb you if you didn’t want me in here,” Luther explained. “We didn’t really have the best relationship before you left and you’ve been through a lot, so you don’t need any extra stress.”

“It’s okay, Luther,” Viktor assured him again. “I haven’t been around people other than my husband for the last decade but I can tell that you’ve changed. You’re welcome to come and sit with me. I could use the company of someone that’s not asleep.”

“Right,” Luther flushed and gave Viktor and awkward little smile. He crossed the floor and then lowered himself down into the armchair that was angled towards the beds for visitors that were going to be sleeping in the infirmary. It was something that Grace had included when they were children because of their stubbornness at wanting to be with their best friends and siblings. “I, uh, a lot has changed since you left. Including me.”

Viktor shifted so that he was sitting up properly and holding his stomach in his hands. “What happened? I know you can’t tell me everything, but it seems like even the house is different.”

The taller superpowered man thought about it for a moment, his eyes taking on a far-away look as he sifted through all of his memories. “Well, not long after you and Five disappeared, Diego left.”

“Where did he go?” Viktor asked worriedly. He had yet to see the marksman and while he and Diego hadn’t been the closest, the latter preferring to spend his time fighting with Luther or hanging out with Klaus, Viktor still cared deeply for his brother. Some of his fondest memories were of them working on music together when they were allowed to have their hour of extracurriculars of their choice.

“He joined the police academy for a while. Allison and I theorized that it had something to do with him wanting to help people but not being in Dad’s pocket. He left after less than a year after he joined it,” Luther explained.

“What happened after that?” Viktor asked. Knowing that his brother had left the Academy was reassuring, he wanted all of his siblings to be able to escape the strict control of the man that had abused them their entire lives.

That question took a little longer to answer than Viktor was necessarily comfortable with. “I don’t know,” Luther shrugged. “We never really kept in touch and at that point Dad had already sent me to a university so that I could study. I kept me going on missions all the way until he died and it was only after he was gone that I realized how wong he was for doing that.”

A warmth spread through Viktor’s chest. He knew that his siblings weren’t likely to keep in touch with each other when they were finally free to go their separate ways, there wasn’t much that bonded them together back then, but it seemed like they had been keeping track of each other enough to know that the others were okay. Even though they were all different people and they hadn’t been allowed to develop their personalities until they were away from Reginald, they had been raised together and thus belonged together in at least a small way.

“What about the others?”

“Well, Allison left on our birthday. She said that she was going to go to Hollywood to become a famous movie star. She was always talking about it, but she did it more after you all left. I think that it might have been her way of coping with the fact that you were gone. It hit us all pretty hard when we realized you weren’t come back,” Luther admitted.

“Did she make it? She was always the most melodramatic when we did those little plays,” Viktor smiled fondly. He and Five had reenacted a couple of the scenes from their assignments in between keeping themselves alive in their wasteland. It was something that had kept them close to their siblings while they were trying their hardest to get back to them.

“She did,” Luther nodded. “Her first big movie came out a year after she left and then she just kept making more. I think she got married recently too, to an actor named Patrick.”

Viktor smiled. “That’s wonderful. What about Ben?”

“You could just ask me, you know,” Ben said from the doorway.

Luther jerked in his chair and looked like he was about to leave, but the other ex-hero quickly motioned for him to sit back down. “I know that our last couple years in the Academy weren’t great, but we’re still family, Luther. You can be hanging out with Viktor at the same time as me, as long as he’s also okay with it.”

“I missed you all so much that I want all of you around me all the time. Not literally, I think I would get pretty fed up with not being able to hear my own thoughts or be alone with my husband, but I did missed you a lot,” he laughed. Despite all the time that had passed and the confidence that he had gained from being off his medication, he was still awkward and social cues were still very difficult.

Ben laughed as he walked over. He grabbed another one of the crappy chairs that were stacked in the corner of the infirmary from back in their school days, when they learned about medical procedures as they were performed on their siblings. “How are you feeling today, Vik?”

“Better,” the other nodded. “I think every day I’m beginning to get healthier. I can eat more than I did when I first arrived and Mom said that I’ve already gained two pounds. Hopefully most of that is going to Baby.”

That softened the air around them as both of his brothers were reminded of the tiny, unborn life that Viktor was harboring inside of him. “I still think it’s crazy that you and Five are actually going to be parents in a couple of months,” Ben commented.

“I know, it’s been hard for me to process too and I’m the one that’s actually pregnant,” Viktor laughed. It felt good to do that again. Ben had been fairly close with him and Five before they had left, so there was extra comfort when it came to hanging out with that particular brother.

They lapsed into silence for a moment as no one really knew what to say. Then Ben shifted in his chair, “So when you first got back we reached out to Allison and Klaus, they said that they would be flying back to come and visit you. I don’t know how long they’re going to stay.”

“Klaus and Allison are living with each other?” Viktor asked. He hadn’t been able to ask Luther about that particular member of his family before they had been interrupted.

Ben nodded. “He moved out there with her two years ago. He decided that if he was going to be able to get clean then he had to do it in a place devoid of all the memories he had before and where he didn’t know any of the drug dealers. He went to a rehab facility out in LA and has been doing really well since. I think he’s training to be a dance instructor at the moment, but the career ideas keep changing.”

Viktor had only been around for the beginning of Klaus’ substance abuse issues, they had started when they were all thirteen but had gotten radically worse a month after their fifteen birthday, but he was immensely proud of his brother for being able to do something so hard. “I’m gonna be happy to see them. Hopefully Five will be awake by the time that they get here.”

“Speaking of awake,” a voice from the doorway startled everyone other than Viktor. He had heard their mother approaching from when she had been down in the kitchen, a side effect of having to live paranoid of violent survivors and breaking buildings for the majority of his adult life. Grace tutted, shaking her head affectionately as she walked over to her children. “I’m very happy to see you all getting along with each other, but Ben and Luther are going to have to come back and visit another time. Viktor needs his rest so that baby of his can come to us strong and healthy.”

“Of course, Mom,” Luther replied as he got up. He stopped and awkwardly smiled at his brother before he finished his departure. “I’ll come and talk to you when you’re feeling up for visitors again, if you’d like.”

“I would like that,” Viktor smiled. He had barely known Luther, and had only seen the hard, protective outside of him when they lived together, so he was excited to get the chance now that things were different. Before they had a chance to say anything else, both of the brothers were ushered out of the room and Viktor was once again left alone with his husband.

---

Another week passed before something new finally happened. He was still having near daily ultrasound and doppler checks to make sure that the baby was still growing well inside of him. Nothing much had changed and the baby was steadily improving in health, but after so much anxiety about possibly losing them Viktor wanted to be sure as often as he could be.

He had also been growing in strength, which was most likely contributing to the health of his unborn child. He had gotten most of the monitors removed, but he still consistently had to be hooked up to an IV to administer fluids whenever he was feeling low and the feeding tube to give him some extra nutrients. He had begun to move around more, spending a lot of his days in the chair in the corner of the room instead of his hospital bed. He had also been showering himself instead of allowing Grace to give him a sponge bath. The first time that he had showered was something that he would never forget, and he had never felt cleaner when he cuddled up in his bed.

His newfound freedom when it came to mobility allowed him to nestle up in Five’s bed whenever he was feeling lonely. Luther and Ben still visited him from time to time to chat with him, especially after they convinced Grace to let them take their dinners up in the infirmary to keep Viktor company while he ate. Despite the company that he had from two of his siblings, he still felt isolated when his companion wasn’t by his side as Five had been for almost a decade.

Viktor was settled down in the chair of the corner and had been all morning. He had a book spread open on the arm of the chair and he was reading it out loud, his other hand resting firmly on his stomach. He had a blanket tossed over his legs to keep out the vague chill of the infirmary since he was still having difficulty regulating his own body temperature.

“Knock, knock,” Ben interrupted as he walked up to the door.

The other man didn’t mind at all, since he was starting to get bored of his activity anyway. If the baby had been moving or was actually there and he could see some kind of reaction, reading out loud would have been a much better thing to pass the time. Seeing as they were still soundly asleep inside of him, however, it was mostly just tiring his voice and making him frustrated when he stumbled over the words. “Just in time. I’m starting to go stir crazy in here,” he chuckled.

“Well, I have good news about that. Mom thinks that some movement would do you some good. As long as your joints aren’t hurting you too bad we can go for a walk in the gardens. Luther’s worked really hard on them since Dad died and they’re absolutely beautiful now,” Ben explained.

Memories of what the grounds had looked like back in the days of the Umbrella Academy came rushing back to Viktor. The grass had been cut so short in the few places that it was allowed to grow that it was basically like sitting on dirt. There was a singular massive oak tree towards the back gate of the house that none of them were allowed to go near. There had been no flowers, no shrubs, and instead of a path they had a race track that looped around the garden for when they had to run laps.

He wasn’t sure how he felt about leaving Five alone in the room, just in case he woke up. When he voiced this concern to Ben, he was half expecting to be met with rolled eyes and dismissal. Instead, his brother just walked over and gently took his hand. “I know that you’re worried. But Mom has him under pretty heavy sedation and she’s not going to be bringing him out of it for a while. There is a non-zero chance that he will wake up, that’s true. But if he does, then Mom or Luther will inform us immediately and I’ll use the Horror to carry you back up here through the window so you can be with him.”

Viktor fidgeted for a moment as he thought about the offer. He didn’t want to leave his husband but he was also desperate to get outside into the fresh air. The window in the infirmary had been opened a couple of times during his recovery, but Grace had been worried enough about them getting cold that she didn’t do it often.

“Alright, if you really promise,” Viktor nodded.

Ben extended his hand out towards the other man with his pinky outstretched, “I promise.”

Viktor laughed as he hooked his finger around Ben’s. He knew that his siblings were always going to be bigger than him because even when they were all very young he had been the smallest. Doing the last of his growing in a place where he didn’t have steady nutrients hadn’t helped in the slightest, but he was reminded of it based on the difference in their hands immediately.

After the decision had been made, Ben went downstairs and got Grace. She helped him into a pair of sweatpants, a t-shirt that stretched over his quickly growing stomach, and a jacket to keep away the chill. Their mother also had a wheelchair for him to sit in if he got too tired and so he could make his way through the house easier. She wanted him to walk outside to get some sun and proper fresh air, so she wasn't going to let him tire out by just getting down to the back door.

Ben was there by his side as he allowed Grace to push him out of the recovery room and down the hallway. The infirmary was on the first floor, which was specifically done so that it was beside both of the kitchens. He felt anxiety rising in his chest when his husband was removed from his view by the walls of their home. He had been asleep and unable to speak with Five since they had gotten back and when they were in the wasteland they hadn’t been exactly joined at the hip, but it was still disconcerting for him to be so far away from his partner after they had been through so much together.

He reassured himself by rolling what Ben had said over and over in his head. If something happened, Five was in the best hands that he could be and Viktor would be back in a second. It was a good idea for them to spend some time apart from each other so that they could get back to the life that they had promised they were going to have. They were always going to be one of those couples that was far too attached to each other, but they had always dreamed of having careers and education outside of Grace and Reginald. It was something that they were going to pursue after the baby came, but it also meant they couldn’t be in the same room as the other at all times.

Once they got to the edge of the garden, Viktor placed one hand on his stomach and the other on the arm of the wheelchair. Ben stood next to him as he slowly pushed himself up into a standing position, his hand out and ready to help his brother should he need it. As soon as he was standing, Grace left them to go attend to some of the household chores and keep an eye on Five like she had promised Viktor she would.

Ben looped his arm together with Viktor’s and the two of them began to walk through the opulent gardens that had taken the training space in the backyard. A lot had changed since Viktor was last back there. The running path was gone and had been replaced by an even stone walkway that weaved through an artful arrangement of blooming flowers and neatly trimmed shrubs.

“The air is so clear here,” Viktor commented softly. He tilted his head up so that he could see the crisp robin’s egg blue of the sky, which was only broken up by a couple of fluffy white clouds. He knew that it wouldn’t stay like that for long given where they lived, but it was a soothing to see anyway.

“Was it not where you and Five came from?” Ben asked carefully, trying hard to make suer that he didn’t trigger his brother.

“No, everything was covered in the dust and the air was full of all sorts of stuff. Something horrible had happened there, Ben. It made it so hard to live,” Viktor sighed.

The conversation dropped after that because it was clear that neither of them wanted to continue talking about the atrocities that Viktor had been through at the current moment. They were slowly walking down the stone-lined path to make their way through the garden.

They rounded the corner to see that three other people, who Viktor had somehow missed when they first left the house, were sitting there. He turned towards Ben with a perplexed look before he tried to figure out who was waiting for them around the bend before they got there. A smile split across his face when he saw the rest of his siblings, his heart fluttering like mad in his chest. He hadn’t realized just how much he had missed all the others until he was finally back and in front of them.

“Viktor?” Allison asked as she got tugged out of trying to mediate the conversation between Diego and Klaus. She got up from the bench that she had been sitting on and then reached slowly out to him, as if to ask if it was okay to check and make sure that he was real.

The other superhero barely even thought about whether or not he wanted to be touched as he grasped her hand and then tugged her closer to him. “Hey Allie,” he whispered as he then wrapped his arms around her fully to bring her in for a near bone-crushing hug.

“I thought that we were never going to get you back. When Ben called us I almost didn’t believe him, Klaus was the one to remind me that Ben would never do something like joke about you two coming home,” Allison murmured into her brother’s hair. Viktor had recently had Grace cut it so that it was at a manageable length he actually enjoyed. When he was in the wasteland, but he and Five had let their hair grow as long as it needed to and then lopped it off when they felt like they would hurt the other or themself by doing so.

She pulled away from him so that she could mop the tears off of her face with the side of her hand. “I’m sorry for crying on your shoulder. Do you want to sit down?” she asked as she gestured her hand towards the bench that she had been sitting on.

Viktor glanced over to Ben who gave him a small nod. He hadn’t been there to hear absolutely everything that Grace had said about his care, so he was trusting his brother to be able to help him manage it. Ben had always been more into the medical side of helping their mother in the infirmary anyway, Viktor had just wanted to be helpful.

Carefully, he walked over to the bench and then lowered himself down onto it. His bones were very fragile from having to suffer through his teenage years with barely any nutrients, so they weren’t tolerating the stress that came with having to spread what little they already had for a baby very well. He was in low amounts of pain pretty steadily throughout the day but it was nothing that he couldn’t handle now that he knew his mini-family inside of his family was safe.

The next person to hug him was Klaus, who threw his arms over his brother’s shoulders lazily to bring them closer together. “I’m glad that you’re back, V. Having to be the only trans person in the entire Academy was just too much for little old me.”

Viktor laughed, he had forgotten how good it felt to do that as often as he had been. “I think that you were able to handle all the attention that brought just fine. You never shied away from Dad when he was yelling at you to stop being feminine the way I did for being masculine.”

“Yeah but Mom said that medication had you all fucked up in the head on purpose. I relate to that too,” Klaus said, his face softening affectionately.

He wanted to steer the conversation away from that as quickly as he could. Ben walked over to the other side of the path and sat down on the cement blocks that separated the gravel from the grass and woodchips. Allison was standing restlessly by him, clearly having something to say but not being able to express it properly. She looked a lot more like herself than she had when Viktor had been looking at the pictures of her that Ben had brought him a few days ago. She was wearing a pair of brown chinos with a button-up shirt that she had tied the bottom corners of to make it a pseudo crop top. She had some of her hair in a bun on the top of her head, which had been her favorite way to wear it when they were allowed to do their own.

Viktor turned his head so that he was looking at the last person. He and Diego had always had a strained relationship, more than the one that he had with Luther. Diego had been struggling with the idea of being inferior to anyone but he also had a massive heart that was overflowing with empathy. He had tried to befriend Viktor several times in the quiet of the in-between moments when no one was looking at them, but he always threw himself in the opposite direction when he felt any kind of scrutiny tossed his way.

“Hey, Di,” he said softly as he looked over Klaus and directly at his last brother.

“Hey,” Diego replied awkwardly. “I’m glad you’re back too. E-especially with th-the,” he paused and his mouth twisted. Even after all the time that had passed, Viktor was still able to recognize it as the expression he made when he knew that his stutter was acting up.

“Me too,” Viktor placed his hand protectively over his stomach. “Five and I always knew we wanted kids, but we wanted to raise them in this time instead of the one that we came from. It’s like the universe was telling us that we were going to get what we wanted even if I wish that I had been in better health before I got pregnant.”

Allison listened intently. “My husband and I have been thinking about having a baby of our own. Klaus said that we have to find him a place to move to before that happens though,” she rolled her eyes affectionately at her brother.

“Dear sister, I have to deal with enough shrieking and screaming from beings that only I can see, I don’t also need it from one that everyone can,” Klaus huffed out in explanation. “Congrats on starting your own little family, Vik.”

It turned out that the only thing he needed to slot back into a space in the family was to reunite with his siblings once. Klaus and Allison were both staying at the Academy for the time being, having promised Viktor that they would be there until Five woke up. Diego still lived in The City like Ben and Luther did, so he came and visited but wasn’t actually staying in the building. Each of the siblings had been visiting Viktor and doing things with him to keep him from getting cabin fever.

Allison would sit with him in the living room and show him some of her favorite movies. She refused to let him watch any of hers, obviously embarrassed at the idea of the people that knew her most intimately seeing some of her earlier films. She would always make them a bowl of popcorn, going so far as to bring Viktor a little bowl of chocolate sauce to dip his in, and they would cuddle together on the couch. It was nice to hear sounds and see a television playing something other than the news in a house where Reginald would have never allowed that before.

Luther came and talked with him about what had happened in the past and some of the things that were happening to him now. It was clear he didn’t know what he was supposed to be doing with his brother and was trying his best. Eventually he settled on bringing some of the foods that he was learning how to cook up to the infirmary for them to share. They promised that as soon as Viktor was feeling well enough that he could be on his feet for more than half an hour at a time, they’d make something together.

Ben continued to visit Viktor and take him out to the gardens for walks. They went on one at two in the afternoon every day that the weather was good. They took the same winding path through the gardens and talked about the books that they were both reading. Viktor had recently developed some insomnia, which was very common for pregnant people entering the third trimester. He fought the panic that always waited for him in the deep parts of the night by starting what was essentially a book club with his brother.

Klaus was the one that really shocked him. He brought in hoards of knitting supplies and then began to teach Viktor how to make homemade clothes for the baby. Viktor hadn’t even thought that far into the future, too obsessed with the idea of health and safety to realize what the day-to-day logistics of raising a child would be. Klaus gave Viktor all the drama that Luther had been too oblivious to see or too shy to tell him during their talks.

Diego didn’t come and visit him for the first couple days after he had met up with all of the siblings again. Given that their relationship had been very strained when they were younger, it only made sense that he would be hesitant to come where he might not be wanted. He got bold after a little while and eventually visited with Viktor for what must have been six hours. For the most part, he’d just come and sit with the other man in silence while they both napped. Eventually he brought his guitar and began to help Viktor play a different instrument than his violin, one that he could play around his baby bump while sitting on the hospital bed.

---

Another two weeks passed while Grace was weening Five off of the sedation that he had been on while he recovered from his injuries. Much like Viktor, his body had also begun to respond positively to the nutrients that was being fed to them through the feeding tubes and his skin looked less sallow. It would take time and him actually being able to physically eat enough for his muscle to replenish back to what it had been when he was fourteen and healthy.

Viktor was sitting on the huge recliner in the corner of the room with a book opened on his lap. He was stroking his stomach while reading allowed to the baby inside, feeling a few fluttering movements from within. The baby had yet to move in a way that anyone else would have been able to feel, but Viktor could feel every tiny movement since the child was inside of him.

He glanced up as his brain convinced him that he was hearing something, that there was some other noise in the room around him instead of filtering from elsewhere in the house. He knew that it was ridiculous, he had been unable to hear anything from his husband in what had to have been months since they returned back to where they belonged. The breath was stolen from his lungs when he saw the hazel-green eyes that he had fallen so deeply in love with looking sleepily back at him.

“Five?”

“Hey,” he smiled like this wasn’t the best thing that had happened to Viktor since getting to hear their child’s heartbeat.

The pregnant man shut his book and let it tumble down to the floor as he struggled up to his feet and over to the other hospital bed. He hefted himself up with a smooth motion, the excitement and adrenaline preventing him from feeling the aches and pains that had been plaguing him since he got pregnant. “I can’t believe that you’re awake,” he whispered as he cupped his husband’s face in both of his hands.

“I thought that I could hear you talking and I wanted to see what you were reading. You always used to read out loud whenever I was having trouble sleeping,” Five murmured. He reached up and weakly turned his head to the side so that he could kiss at Viktor’s palm.

“I was reading to our baby, Five,” he replied. “They’re okay. You did it, you got us back to where we belonged safely.”

“I did?” his eyes widened almost comically fast.

Tears had long since begun to rush down his face and drip onto the blanket, but neither of them cared. They had never truly been separated, but Viktor had desperately missed the company of his husband amongst the visits of his siblings. “Mom gave me an ultrasound, I listened to their heartbeat and I got to see them. They’re growing so strong in there, they have ten fingers and ten toes,” he sniffled. They hadn’t been able to get that definitively, of course, but there was enough definition in the grainy black and white image that Viktor was fairly certain of his claim.

“They’re going to be okay?” Five asked. He looked down to the rounded bump on his husband’s front before he tilted his head back up to Viktor.

The other couldn’t say anything, just wordlessly nodding before he leaned down and stole another kiss. “We’re going to be okay, Five. The three of us aren’t alone anymore. We have Mom to take care of our injuries just like we did before we left and all of our siblings still really love us. We’re going to be able to raise our family after all.”

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atlafan · 7 months

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What Nick did to you I will never ever understand. I mean, to be honest, it always seemed that you did the most and tried the most for your relationship to move forward but it was easy to put aside as a ”guy thing”. And it’s so fucking horrible that they get away with leading women on for years with so little effort just to destroy things and go along their own way like it never happened! Like we want to be MARRIED and we want to have KIDS is that so much to ask???

Yeah it'll never make sense to me. Men don't think ahead. He called my dad the summer before he proposed and then sat on the ring for like almost two months. My dad was almost going to ask like hey what's taking so long???

The thing is, I wasn't super active on here in the first couple of years of our relationship. I'm not making excuses for him, but the first couple of years with him were great. He was attentive, and caring, and sweet. He would bring home flowers as a surprise every few months. We had a very beautiful 50/50 relationship. We still fought about things, it wasn't perfect, but I still felt like it was a good partnership.

I think things shifted after we bought our house, especially because COVID happened two months after we moved in. He wasn't used to me being home all the time. He wasn't used to having me home during his free time, and he wasn't used to not being able to just go for a ride to go shopping or something. He gets antsy, and the lockdown exasperated his anxiety.

Also, I think I just grew up. I was 21 when we met, I was almost 22 when we moved in together. He was 26 going on 27. So for a while he was super comforting because he'd be like, "You just finished school, it's okay to be overwhelmed about things". I felt like I could really lean on him for support. Then, as I got older, and we were in the house, I was like why am the only one who cares that the bathroom is dirty, why am I always nagging him? Then I just straight up started treating him the way he treated me. I let dishes pile up, stuff like that. And I was going on more long weekends because I became a Harry fan and going to concerts. I lived 2 hours from friends and family, so it wasn't out of the ordinary for me to go home for a weekend here and there. But I was starting to travel more. It was easier for me to take time off from work, and I would just pick up and go. If I wanted to do something with him and he wasn't able, I'd still go. I for sure outgrew him, but I loved him and we had Henry and the house, and we were so excited about our wedding. But clearly he was coasting along.

Now I'm 28. He stole some of my best years from me. I'm never going to meet someone new and Henry will be my only baby. He's sealed my fate.

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talenlee · 9 months

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Okay But What Gimmicks Can I Make?

Alright, I talked about gimmicks, which I find interesting, because, you know, they change the timing of a trick. They also unfortunately, change the economics of a trick, because in a lot of cases, there are some things you just can’t do, as a person, unless you’re absolutely amazingly good. Back in the day, the magicians had to work to be that good, but these days, there’s an economics to it that creates the category of, well, moneygicians.

whoah, authentically compression artifacted

I want to share a few short videos here, and let me tell you, magic as a community, with its particular kind of patter, can be really uncomfortable to share freely. Anything you look at here, the channels are probably okay, but also, don’t be surprised if like, one of these dudes is into NFTs or something. If you chase videos in this space you might wind up seeing someone doing old timey patter about dames and oh, take my wife, and yaw, ya see, and that sucks, especially to see people still doing it in like, 2019.

Look, I’m not going to print my own deck of cards with a double backer — a playing card with identical sides, each side showing the card back. I’m just not! But back when Dai Vernon first started doing things with double backers, they were either accidental misprints or, and I know some magicians did this, they were hand made, with the magician learning all sorts of things about making a card so they could split one in half down the centre, and apply the back of one to the back of another, using the right glues to restore it, and that was some craft.

These days I can just go buy a deck of ordinary playing cards that include a double backer. I don’t want a flashy set and I absolutely don’t want a marked deck — the more your deck of cards looks like a thing a magician buys, the more likely people are to assume the deck has something shifty about it. I like when props are completely examinable, and that means the gimmicks I like tend to be cheap.

If I gimmick the ten of clubs in my deck, and that ten of clubs comes from a deck of cards that costs four dollars, it’s not hard to have a second ten of clubs to sub out for the gimmick, you know?

Super Easy Magic Coin Trick Revealed (Perfect for Beginners!)

Watch this video on YouTube

Anyway, that means I tend to think of gimmicks as things to make not things to buy. But also, I don’t want to discourage interest in the gimmick, so I figured I’d show some gimmicks that I think represent the boundaries of ‘time invested’ to make for the effect you get. This is a trick for transferring a coin that lives on the outside of you deck box for a box of cards, promoted here by Sankeymagic. The video is ten minutes long, and features some bookkeeping stuff, but generally, that’s the simple point: There’s a coin glued to the box, so when you do a transfer of a coin off the box, it’s not getting transferred, and you can handle the box however.

I love this gimmick because it’s so unassuming and you can keep it literally constantly. You might not be comfortable with it, but for me, the deck for cards lives in my pocket, and the gimmick being on the box and also changing the way the box handles and feels is really cool – to me, this kind of gimmick is just inherently easy to keep in mind and make safe. The trick is a little expensive – after all, you need a coin, and if you’re not in a space you can recover it, any lapped or grounded coin is going to run the risk of being lost – and it does limit the kinds of coins you can use for a trick, but these days, people are unlikely to have coins on hand to do those tricks anyway. Who wants to handle money?

HARDCORE Sharpie thru CARD - TUTORIAL

Watch this video on YouTube

Alright, that’s a really simple, easy gimmick to make. By comparison, check out an extremely complicated gimmick to make that gets you a really vast effect. This involves busting out the needle and thread and making a multi-door, angle-specific, tool-focused gimmick that means you need to keep the right kind of pen around to make the effect look its best.

Have I made this gimmick? have I heck. This is however an example of how the level of artistry that goes into a gimmick is itself, a handcraft project. Remember when I described ‘gluing cards together’ originally? This is at that level. You can buy it, of course – I’m sure there are people selling versions of this gimmick! – but if you dont’ want to, you have this option and the pieces for making it aren’t expensive, they’re just detail focused.

Turns out a lot of magic stuff is detail focused, who knew.

Alright, though, that’s my opinion of gimmicks, but I’m a schlub who does magic tricks for little kids who… are now teenagers. That’s weird. Hm, don’t like contemplating that. Point is, I can talk a good game, but what about people with expertise? After all, the tricks I’m describing are props, but that’s not to say they’re the only way to do the tricks they’re showing, and professionally made, industrial machined devices can definitely get you easier effects…

Exposing Magicians For Having No Talent - day 79

Watch this video on YouTube

But are they better?

The answer is in any situation, ‘it depends.’ What you need and want to use in a performance is limited. If you’re doing things at a distance and you can afford it, I’d say buy gimmicked shit because you’re safe and nobody runs the risk of seeing or handling your props. They’re another way to outsource control.

But the tricks I like, they’re impromptu, and gimmick I work with are cheap, because it costs a lot to look cheap and, me? I can’t afford it. I have to be authentically cheap, after all.

Finally, I want to show you while I’ve got your attention on magic videos, I want you to check out this piece by Daniel Roy.

10 Levels of Sleight of Hand: 3 CARD MONTE

Watch this video on YouTube

First things first, I think Roy is a great magician, though I am not so skilled or aware as to tell you how he’s a great magician. I think he uses a very understated, calm style, I think he does a good job of making his actions feel slow and reasonable, he doesn’t do much of the flair or distinctive moements you might be used to when you see a more old-school style handler at work. Like, I like Sankey’s work but when you see enough of his work you’ll see how much of what he does is presentation that’s designed to make some exaggerated movements seem normal, just because you’re used to them.

Anyway, the thing about this video I like is that after Roy shows you a good trick, he then breaks down what Monte is. Not the trick – the card mechanics, I could guess at what he’s doing at each stage but I would be guessing – but rather what the whole setup of Monte is and what it’s for, and why we love using it as a framing device. It’s a game designed to scam you and you shouldn’t fall for a scam. Particularly, and vitally, in my opinion, he underscores that there are lots of other things about you that are vulnerable while you are being conned.

Magic is a performance, magic is for play, and you can get that safely and should respect those who can do it, because they’re (we’re?) the honest ones who’ll tell you we’re lying.

Check it out on PRESS.exe to see it with images and links!

#Making

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huge-enthusiast · 3 years

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Miraculous fic recomendations!!

This is just an excuse to show all my bookmarks? Yes. Yes, it is. I'm pretty sure most of this fics are really popular, but try see if you find something you didn't knew about!

All of the fics will be rated Teen and up audiences or lower. Also if I don't put the author's tumblr is because they didn't put it in the fic or/and I couldn't find it.

Pairing: Adrien Agreste | Chat Noir/Marinette Dupain-Cheng | Ladybug

knowing you by emsylcatac (they are not really the author of the fic but that's the account that says in the fic, the actual author doesn't have an account).

After dropping their transformations months ago, Marinette and Adrien see each other for the first time after being apart. They've both left too much unsaid and have to work to pick up the pieces of their confused hearts.

Chapters: 1/1

Post-reveal but mostly ladynoir, light angst with happy ending.

the last day on earth by Reiaji

The first time Marinette sees Chat Blanc, she's fourteen years old. The second time, fifteen—the third time, seventeen.

The closer she grows to Adrien, the harder it is to save him.

Chapters: 1/1

Post-reveal lovesquare, kinda heavy angst, hopeful ending.

tell me something i don't know by carpisuns (@carpisuns here on tumblr)

Do you think it still means something? To love someone, even if the universe said you had to?

The odds of having a soulmate are about negative one billion (or something like that). But somehow, like they always have, Marinette and Chat Noir find themselves together. They’re ready to finally tell each other everything, but it turns out that even soulmates have to keep secrets, and while their bond draws them together, duty forces them apart.

Chapters: currently 17/28 (WIPs can be exhausting but this one is 100% worth the wait!)

Mostly marichat but almost all of the lovesquare sides make an appearance, soulmates au, mostly fluff but it can get angsty if it wants to.

One Thing After Another by SKayLanphear

Marinette notices that, sometimes, Adrien acts a little out of the ordinary--like the time he stood in a cardboard box for no reason, or when he actually hissed at Nino. It's only when she starts to notice the similarities between Adrien and a certain feline that she begins to get suspicious.

Basically, Adrien acts like a cat when he probably shouldn't.

Chapters: 15/15

Mostly adrienette with one sided reveal by Marinette's side, miraculous side effects (by both sides wich is really cool!), it's fluff with a lil tiny angst for drama.

This would take some getting used to by Codango (@codango here on tumblr!)

Adrien peeked out from behind the chimney even as the magic of his own Chat Noir mask fell away.

She was still visible, her dark hair bobbing under the street lamps a couple blocks away.

“Marinette.”

Adrien blew out a confused breath. His fiery Ladybug… was the quiet little mouse who sat behind him in class?

“What. The.”

This… would take some getting used to.

Chapters: 8/8

Adrienette with one sided reveal by Adrien's part, awkward flirting, just fluff, nothing to worry about.

comfort food also by Reiaji!

In Marinette's house, cooking is a language of love, and Marinette loves Adrien more than most.

Chapters: 1/1

Adrienette with a little of ladynoir, super super fluff, a lot of insight into Marinette's chinese heritage.

The right side of his face by walkingonthestars (@hamsternamedmarinette here on tumblr!)

Marinette and Adrien are able to remain in their new seats in the back of the room at the end of Chameleon.

Chapters: 1/1

Adrienette, fluff with light angst.

it's a long way forward so trust in me by aloneintherain (@captainkirkk here on tumblr!)

“You’re not the only strong one around here, Chat,” Marinette said. She looked a little winded, but she wasn’t struggling to hold him up.

This close up, he could see the freckles on the bridge of her nose. He could see how that smug smile lit up her eyes. He could feel the strain of her arms—and wow, okay, he really wasn’t the only person around here with muscles.

Six times Marinette carried Adrien (plus one time he carried her).

Chapters: 1/1

All the sides of the lovesquare! Fluff with LOTS of mutual pining.

a fight that you were born to lose also by aloneintherain

When the prosecution starts throwing around the word victim in reference to Adrien, he has to stuff his hands under his thighs to keep himself from bolting out of the courtroom.

Adrien had felt unsafe during those last few weeks, but, until he had woken up and seen Father silhouetted in his bedroom doorway, that had only been paranoia. Father was controlling and cold, but he wasn’t hateful. Adrien was isolated. He was often hungry. And some weeks ago, when he had snuck out to visit Nino, sitting thigh-to-thigh on his bed while Adrien cried in that silent, crumbling way of his, he hadn’t argued when Nino put a hand on his shoulder and said, tentatively, That’s abuse.

But Adrien remembers being small and Father touching his hair after he’d aced another test; Father holding his scribbled drawings like they were something precious, and framing them around his office; Father, dressed as Hawkmoth, his eyes wild behind the mask, lashing his sword against Adrien’s baton; Father, collapsed against Mum, crying into her ashy hair.

Adrien finds out Gabriel is Hawkmoth, and Gabriel gets to bring his long-waited plan into action.

Chapters: 1/1

This one doesn't really focus in the ship that much as is an Adrien character study and an exploration of his relationship with his father, but they're still there so I put them here. Really heavy angst (this is one of this fics that haunt me in the middle of the night) with a happy ending. ❗TW: parental abuse, eating disorders❗

Supercut by LNC

Marinette loves her friends and Adrien can't deal.

Chapters: 1/1

Post-reveal lovesquare, again light angst, an exploration of Adrien's insecurities, Marinette Dupain-Cheng deserves the world, happy ending.

Madame Snare by jettiebettie

“Sounds like a lot of work for nothing. She should take this as a sign to have a relaxing weekend with no responsibilities.”

“It's a lot of work she put her whole heart into. It wouldn't be right for it to go to waste,” Adrien whispers to him. The look on Marinette's face is enough to cause Adrien's own heart to ache. If anyone deserves the satisfaction and pride from a job well done, it's her.

“Too bad there isn't anyone else who can walk in those death traps,” Plagg says. Adrien hums in thought, tapping his chin.

“I could.”

Chapters: 1/1

Marichat, episode-based, Chat Noir in a dress!!!, light angst but it's mostly just idiots being idiots and a lot of fun.

in the same sun by peachcitt (@peachcitt here on tumblr!)

"It’s hard to believe that I saw you last at the peak of summer, when the sun was close and warm - and so were you. It should go without saying that I miss you. I miss you something terrible."

"It’s been seven months to the day since I’ve seen you. I wish you were here more than anything else."

Two letters, signed with initials instead of names, found in Paris, France.

Chapters: 1/1

Ladynoir, just angst, that's it, written like letters. No ending, just pain.

an uncurtain discovery by Missnoodles (@ladyofthenoodle here on tumblr!)

When he returns from school on Wednesday afternoon, Adrien discovers the darkness in his own home. He struggles to come to terms with it. To his utter mortification and delight, Ladybug is nearby to rescue him.

(He does not discover that his father is supervillain. That will happen on a different Wednesday.)

Chapters: 1/1

Ladrien, it says it's crack, and don't get me wrong, is super funny, but I also found it sad as fuck?

An Open Secret by Kasienda

Adrien whirled around toward Marinette. She smiled at him.

He couldn’t smile back. He stared at her like the dumb blond model that he was often accused of being.

Something shifted in her expression. And her warm open Marinette smile transformed into Ladybug’s grin. He was looking at Ladybug right now.

He knew Ladybug’s name!

Her name was Marinette Dupain-Cheng.

And he couldn’t say anything! Not to Marinette! Not even to Plagg, who had confided two weeks prior that Master Fu was growing increasingly paranoid since the location of his home and hideout had been compromised. Their master had apparently decided that Chat Noir and Ladybug would have to give up their miraculouses if they ever discovered each other’s identities.

It wasn’t fair!

...

A fic where they both know, but can't openly talk about it.

Chapters: 4/4

Post-reveal... but is it? Mostly adrienette and ladynoir, fluff with light angst and them being absolute idiots at hiding their secret identity.

golden (like daylight) by okayanna (@anna-scribbles here on tumblr!)

Friendship, Adrien decided, shaking off the mental image of Marinette’s hurricane eyes and hesitant mouth, parted in a small, careful “o.” He had a very strong friendship with Marinette. That was all.

Adrien thinks a lot about words, love, and Marinette Dupain-Cheng.

Chapters: 1 + epilogue

Adrienette but has lots of ladynoir, another Adrien character study because I hate myself, it tries to not be angst but the writing will punch you in the guts and make you cry, it's so good.

Strangers in the Bright Lights by poodles (@ladybeug here on tumblr!)

Adrien is about two drinks in when he sees a girl at the end of the bar wearing black cat ears. It's kind of weird, so he watches her, and although it's crowded he can see her face when she turns around. She’s wearing a Chat Noir mask. He takes a quick look around- nobody else is wearing a mask. Just her.

Adrien finishes his gin martini and heads over to her. He could use some company tonight anyways, he hasn’t told anyone he’s back in Paris and Nathalie won’t arrive in town for another month. And it’s been a rough day, okay? A rough move! He’s not sure he wants to be back yet, and he spent most of the day in the Agreste mansion sorting through some photographs of his father he found in the study. Maybe he wants a drink and some stranger to tell him he’s pretty! That’s not a crime, is it?

Chapters: 1/1

Adrienette but it's also ladrien??? I think??? It's super super angsty but they're both drunk the entirety of the fic so it's also really funny.

Pick-Up and Chase by also SKayLanphear

After she accidentally trips into Adrien and apologizes about "falling for him," Marinette learns that he's no match for cheesy pick-up lines--whether they were unintended or not. And while she finds it flattering that he turns into a flustered mess with only a few words, Marinette comes to regret making him uncomfortable. That is, until she learns he's Chat Noir. At which point the phrase "just deserts" becomes a permanent fixture in her everyday plans.

A story in which Adrien is flustered, Marinette is smooth as glass at dropping lines, and Chat Noir gets the romance he was always asking for--even if he doesn't quite know how to handle it.

Chapters: 10/10

Adrienette with one sided reveal by Marinette's side, it doesn't say it in the tags but I'm pretty sure the characters are much older than they actually are in the show, so much fluff and so much flirting.

Pairing: Alya Césaire/Nino Lahiffe

Nino Has Done Nothing To Deserve This by GuardianKarenTerrier (@guardiankarenterrier here in tumblr)

It's nothing, really- just an innocent comment, a joke. But when they hear it, Nino and Alya come to a realisation.

There were, in retrospect, dozens upon dozens of hints. Now that they're suddenly aware of all their friend's flimsy excuses and rushed explanations, they're not only sure how they've missed it, they're not sure how anyone else has either. They realise that it had to be magic protecting their friends- and that same magic has ceased to work on the two of them.

Well, this means they'll just have to start watching over their friends themselves.

Chapters: 7/7

This is more a found family fic than anything else, Alya and Nino are the mom friend, has light angst but it's mostly identity shenanigans in the most bizarre way. ❗TW: eating disorders❗

christmas lights by demistories

Nino checks up and down the street, checking to make sure there’s no raging akuma headed his way before he crosses quickly and ducks inside the small café. He closes the door quickly before the icy air can blow inside and tugs his beanie down over his ears. He spots Alya sitting alone in the corner.

Chapters: 1/1

Just fluff!! Really short but really sweet.

hold on, i still want you also by Missnoodles!

Written for the @thedjwifizine ! Wich I also recommend if you wanna binge a lot of djwifi fics while also looking at amazing art!!!

Five times Alya ran into her ex, and the one time he stopped being her ex.

Chapters: 1/1

Light angst with a happy ending! I don't really like the ex-lovers to lovers trope but this one is the only exception.

I will continue to expand the list in the future! But by now I hope I was helpful in the search of new fics!

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house-of-laminations · 2 years

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Hi, hello, um, big fan here! I just, I love everything you’ve written and I just, I would love to know your thoughts on Lilith. I think about her constantly and I usually HC my MC thinks about her and kind of tries to talk to her. I feel like that one convo with her just, I don’t know, it makes me wish we could still talk to her. She showed us stuff, she saved us!! I just , I don’t know, I super want to read your thoughts on her.

💛 hello!

I do indeed have Thoughts™ on Lilith! Many of them! Let's see if I can string them together into some coherency - apologies in advance if this comes out essay-like...

In terms of their personal connection, I wrote a little bit here about Lilith's power in relation to MC but a tl;dr of it is that I believe that Lilith's power, her soul for lack of a better word, is MC's soul. However, growing up physically, mentally, and emotionally as a human meant that they don't have the knowledge or capability to utilize any of that power. It's only upon making contact with Lilith's grimoire - her memories - that MC gains the ability to be able to comprehend and access those abilities and memories. The way I see that manifesting beyond just 'sheer power' is deja vu. They experience new places that feel familiar, they remember conversations they've never had. Even their relationships are (comparatively) quick to spark with immortals who have been stuck in this emotional rut for presumably millennia.

I'm not sure if I believe there's enough of Lilith left to have full conversations with but I do think their connection goes deeper than just being able to speak to one another. Lilith's guidance is present in MC's choices and circumstances almost right from the get-go.

Lilith was a powerful angel who willingly ventured into the human world, spurred mostly by her brother's interest and curiosity. There, she fell for a human which ultimately lead to a schism in heaven and her brothers falling. It widened the divide between the three realms and ended in her 'death'. Her happy ending was to live out her days as a human, and after dying her mortal death she continued to watch over her brothers.

MC, meanwhile, was an ordinary human by all rights (canonically at least, leaving behind any personal headcanons). They're forcefully drawn into a realm beyond their own thanks to the curiosity of someone much, much stronger than them. They're surrounded by beings that at any point could consume them - mind, body, and soul. Nevertheless not only does MC's actions and presence ultimately lead to mending the relationships between the brothers, it also begins to bridge the gap between all three realms.

Lilith's love broke the world, but MC's love will build it (kudos to @demonfamilytherapist for that bombass line). There's a line towards the end of S3 (or so I'm told) in which [spoilers] Diavolo is working his hardest in order to allow MC to live with them permanently in devildom as the spouse of a demon lord/prince. Their stories are mirrors of one another.

The symmetry between their lives is something that could be coincidence, could be fate, or could just be an old tattered soul trying to learn from its mistakes. What Lilith helped break, MC is slowly helping to mend.

Sometimes MC feels a sense of comfort, of love and safety. It's not from their lover/s... but rather, from within. This is a contentment beyond mere self confidence. It's a soul who loves itself and who its become, who is grateful for the journey and excited for what's next.

There you go! My own personal thoughts and headcanons about the relationship between Lilith and MC... I'm a sucker for tragedy and angst at heart so I tend to lean away from actual conversations between the two - but that doesn't mean there's nothing between them. I hope this satisfies 💛

#rottenchoicesbroughtmehere #obey me lilith #obey me mc #obey me meta #obey me headcanons #i talk to a real human #rip ios users sorry you cant see this post #or likely any in this fandom

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ray-ray-writings · 3 years

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drabble idea: after Wilbur is killed by Phil, Fundy finds a smol arctic fox hybrid reader and cuz they're both foxes and the hybrid child looks abandoned, he adopts them. Then Ghostbur shows up and Fundy doesn't want him to have anything to do with his child. maybe some other relationships for fluff??? i'm just craving this rn -💍

So imagines won right? I sit down and go to write the imagine, and I just end up staring at a blank screen for what felt like forever. I know I said I would give you the option but I honestly couldn’t put anything in my brain for it. And because I spent so long staring at it, I lost a lot of time and so this is the only post for tonight…. I feel so bad. I’m sorry guys, I should have more stuff tomorrow. <3

TW: Parental abandonment.

This idea is so cute though.

So we all know that Wilbur wasn’t the best father. He really messed Fundy up and gave him some of those good good daddy issues to where he has a hard time trusting people. But I think that he would be out on a walk, clearing his mind, trying to think of anything but his father. He’d be in a snowy biome when he hears footsteps. At first he thinks it’s a mob of some kind, so he draws his weapon and creeps toward the sound. He catches sight of something white and at first he thinks it’s a skeleton, but then the thing moves again and he can very clearly see it’s an ear, a white fluffy ear… That’s odd. “Hello?” he finally decides to call out. There is a small squeak and a lot of rustling. When he wasn’t attacked, he figured it safe to move forward. He carefully approached and as he pushed some of the bushes out of the way to reveal a small child. In one quick glance he could tell this was no ordinary child. It was an arctic fox hybrid, the fluffy white ears and tail a dead give away. In his glance, he could also tell this child was in rough shape. Their clothes were tattered and torn allowing him to see just how skinny they were. His heart ached for the poor child, “Hello little one,” he greets softly, “What are you doing out here?”

You’d been on your own for a really really long time now. Your parents had brought you out here, told you to stay put, and left. You listened and so you waited for them to come back. But as the days went on, you began to understand what had happened. But nevertheless, you sat there and waited. Munching on the berries of the bushes, but it never quite fills your stomach. One day as you’re moving from bush to bush, a voice calls out. It startles you and you can’t help but let out a squeak as you fall to the ground in surprise. The bushes shuffle a bit and from over the top you find an orange headed man peering at you curiously. His eyes scan you quickly before he speaks, “Hello little one,” his voice soft and comforting as he speaks, “What are you doing out here?” You give him a little shrug and allow yourself to look him up and down. You’re heart thuds a little faster as you notice that he is also a fox hybrid with orange and black ears, an orange and white tail, and sharp canines poking out from his lips. “Where are you parents?” he tries again. Again, you give a little shrug and figuring you can trust this man, you speak, “Gone… Let me here.” His heart breaks at your sad and defeated tone. “They left you here? All by yourself? When did they leave?” Another shrug, “Two… three….. Weeks.” you mumble, looking down to the berry bushes, your fingers grazing them carefully. Fundy’s heart burns in anger as he thinks about how horrible your parents were for leaving their obviously amazing child to die in the woods. He’s about to speak when your stomach grumbles loudly causing you to flush in embarrassment. “Hungry?” Fundy asks, then mentally smacks himself. Of course you’re hungry your stomach just rumbled. But you nod sheepishly, still plucking at the leaves. “How would you like to come home with me. I can fix you up some fish. I have lots of fish at my house. You could eat as much as you’d like and you could stay as long as you want.” Not even caring if this guy was lying to you, you accept his offer, simply desperate to get out of the woods. Your head slowly rises from the bushes as you stare at Fundy who is smiling at you ever so softly with an outstretched hand. Carefully you raise your own arm and gently rest your hand in his, shivering at the warmth that spreads throughout your palm. “Let’s get going then kiddo.”

Fundy leads you out of the forest and towards his house. As you two walk, you two talk… Well he does a lot of the talking and you give small answers here and there. You tell him your name and he tells you his. He talks about where you’re going and how it’s extremely safe there and how he thinks you’ll like it. He leads you inside his house, sits you at the table, before making up some fish for you and him. He places the plate down in front of you and before he can sit to eat his own meal, yours is finished. To say he’s shocked is an understatement, but he quickly remembers you were out in the forest all alone for two to three weeks, maybe longer with nothing but berries. You’re looking at him super embarrassed, like you want to ask for more but are too scared too. “Hey, it’s okay,” he soothes, walking back over to you, setting his own plate down in front of you, picking up the empty one, “You don’t have to feel bad. Like I said, I have plenty of fish, eat as much as you like.” And so you do. You eat until you’re so full you can barely move. Your eyes are sleepily closing and then jerking back open as you try to force yourself to stay awake. Fundy notices this and laughs quietly to himself. Your eyes close for a little while, giving Fundy enough time to put his plan into action. He quickly stands up, moves to you, picks you up, and carries you to his bed. He carefully lays you down, tucks you in, and presses a kiss to the top of your head. “Sleep well darling,” he mumbles, not thinking much of it. “Thanks dad” you mumble back, clearly out of it. But the simple word stops Fundy’s heart before a huge smile grows on his face. He decides that he wants you to be his child, if you want. He can feel a connection and a strong desire to care and love for you and he wants to be that strong father figure that he himself did not have. The next morning when you wake up, you don’t remember what you said obviously. You also plan to leave and go back to the forest. You would thank Fundy for feeding you but you already feel you've overstayed your welcome. You make your way down to the kitchen, ready to tell the man who saved you, who you don’t want to leave, goodbye. Fundy is standing over the stove and at the sound of your footsteps his head turns and he grins brightly at you, “Hey kiddo! Have a seat! Eggs are almost done! I hope you like them scrambled!” Not wanting him to feel bad, you do as you’re told and decide to tell him after breakfast. True to his word, the eggs don’t take that much longer and soon he’s served you some eggs. You two eat together, talking a bit about how you both slept and stuff. And after you’re done, you’re just about to tell him but then he begins to tell you about his plans for the day and asks if you want to tag along and you do. You really do. It is then you decide that you’ll stay until Fundy asks you to leave, and if that means you’re staying forever… So be it.

Okay on to some more general headcanons and less plot type stuff haha

You two help each other in grooming your ears and tails all the time. I feel like they can be hard to get perfectly clean by yourself so you two do it together as a bonding activity. You would do Fundy’s first because it takes less time. Fundy does a lot of it and you just get the hard to reach spots and stuff, and makes sure there is no spot left unclean. However, when it’s your turn, Fundy takes complete control. He will make you just sit there and let him groom and take care of you. He is so careful as he does it. He cleans your ears and your tail carefully, making sure no dirt is left. And then he takes the time to carefully brush out the hair and make it very soft and very fluffy. It feels so nice. I would imagine you didn’t have the nicest parents, they literally left you in a forest to die, so you never got this special treatment or attention for your ears or tail. So the first time you two did this, you would be so confused. You didn’t understand what was happening or why you were being treated so kindly, which broke Fundy’s heart. I feel that’s also partly why he doesn’t let you help because he wants to make sure that you know that you will be loved and cared for as long as he’s in your life.

So that being said, you two are so affectionate with each other. Like you curl up together and cuddle on the couch all the time. It has a lot to do with the fox side of both of you. It feels really nice to be pressed against family of your own ‘breed’ so to speak. A lot of the time it’s a lot of you sitting on his lap or laying on top him while he holds you tightly. Again, he wants to make sure that you feel loved and wanted.

I feel like it wouldn’t take you long to call him dad. Like you accidentally did the first night, but you weren’t really awake for it. But I do feel like it would be a slip of the tongue on your part again. Just he does something for you and you give a quick “thanks dad” before you dead stop and stare at him. His eyes are also wide and filling with tears. “I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to call you that. I don’t want to make you uncomfortable. It just that you have taken care of me from the moment I got here and I--” Fundy would cut you off by pulling you into a tight hug. “It’s okay Y/N. It really is. It would be an honor if you called me your father” he tells you. Your heart soars in your chest as you hug him back. “Okay… Thank you dad.” You two go to sleep that night with the biggest smiles on your faces that you’ve ever had.

…….. Speaking of dads….. Ghostbur comes back. One day there is a knock on the door. You’re both confused because no one should be coming over to your knowledge. But Fundy gets up and he opens the door and his confusion turns into anger. “What are you doing here?” He spits out. You slowly make your way to the front room, hiding behind a wall but peeking your head around the corner to see what was happening. There in front of your father stood an extremely pale man in a yellow sweater and a red beanie. “Hello Fundy!” the man greets, oblivious to Fundy’s harsh tone, “I came to visit you! I wanted to see my son!” A gasp catches in your throat, this was your dad’s dad. He hadn’t told you much about him, he just told you that he used to be close with his father but as he grew more obsessed with politics, that bond broke bit by bit until it was completely severed by his death. “Well that sucks because I don’t want to see you. Go away now” Fundy snaps back, waving him off. Ghostbur catches his harsh tone now and a frown settles on his face, “Fundy please. I want to talk. I want to mend what was broken. You’re my son and-” “And nothing. You should have thought about that before you went and blew up our nation and then got stabbed by grandpa… So goodbye now.” Fundy moves out of the doorway and goes to close the door. When he moved out of the doorway though, he accidentally gives Ghostbur a direct line of sight of you peeking around the corner. He lets out a gasp and points, “Fundy who’s that.” Fundy looks over his shoulder and pales a little but because oh fuck. This is the last thing he wanted to happen. He clears his throat and looks back to the ghost of his father. “That’s Y/N… My kid” “I have a grandchild?” “No you don’t because you are no father of mine. Now if you’ll excuse me” and before Ghostbur can respond, Fundy has slammed the door closed. You’re a little worried as to what he’s going to say to you so you speak first after you walk all the way in, “I’m sorry” you whisper. “No, no, no baby. It’s okay. It’s not your fault. Don’t worry about it.” The rest of the day, Fundy is a little off. He tries to act normal but you can tell something is off. You don’t call him out on it though, you just let him do him.

But yeah. Fundy does everything in his power to keep you away from Ghostbur. He does not care a single bit if Ghostbur isn’t Wilbur, they were both still his father that practically abandoned him and so therefore he will not be around his child. His child will only be surrounded by those who love them unconditionally and will always love them. If you and him are out and public and Ghostbur appears, Fundy will take you back home. He doesn’t care if what he is doing is super important, he will leave and take you home. He also will not let Ghostbur in his home. Ghostbur does show up occasionally, hoping to catch another glance of you, but Fundy barely opens the door to the point where Ghostbur can hardly see him. Fundy will let Phil, Techno, and Tommy see you occasionally which hurts Ghostbur a lot, but there is nothing he can do about it. Fundy does not want his ghost father to be anywhere near his child.

But Fundy would be an amazing father. He knows what it’s like to be/feel abandoned by a parent and to feel ignored in a world full of family. So he makes sure you never feel like that. He loves you so much and makes sure you know that. Fundy would do anything for you, give anything for you. He loves you so much. His precious baby child.

Okay that ending sucked lololol. Again, I’m very sorry that this is the only post tonight. I got a much later start than I planned and it fucked everything. I’ll see you guys with more content tomorrow though (hopefully).

#mcyt #mcyt imagine #mcyt x reader #mcyt drabble #fundy #fundy imagine #fundy x reader #fundy drabble #ghostbur #ghostbur x reader #wilbur soot #tw: abandonment #💍 anon #anon #ray responds

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6blackfilin9 · 3 years

Note

I love your Anko fanart! Tell me, what are your views/headcannons on Anko X Kazuku?

hThank you so much for the ask, finally I can answer it

here is my big thank you for the waitng

In a nutshell, the shipp was created by accident while me and my buddy were working on our first Naruto AU in 2019, where Kakuzu and Deidara survived their shitty plotholes end eventually ended up in Konoha

Yeah

so, the shipp’s birth date is july the 1, 2019

anything like classy, aristocracy kind of tension-filled passionate gothic romance with playful, psychological games & hurt/comfort vibes with slight scent of rivalry is KakuAnko

Basically, they are: a very, very old man with absolutely horrendous background who’s trying to finally have his mother*cking 10 or 30 years of peace, and a rather young lady with a rocky youth who’s being good & noble yet has very strong antihero tendencies

You know, I think they do have potential, since, in fact, they seem to be very similar, at the core

They are both very pragmatic realists, the people of logic and reason, yet if Kakuzu’s irritability doesn’t affect him a tiny bit due to his ideal self-control, Anko’s can lead her to quite bad places, sometimes. They put their interests in the first place, and even though she tries to attach them to Konoha’s, she still has ‘personal’ things (I’ll write ‘bout it lower*). Their mindsets are so complicatedly organized that, at some point & way, it prevents them from having many close people, and makes them very hard to see through and predict

Both of them are very flexible & adaptive, independent individuals with similar outlooks on plenty of things and high intellectual level. They clearly can find plenty of traits that they would highly respect and adore in each other

Here I will speak mostly for “why and how” kind of things, bc both of them are terribly tricky to accurately figure out. But there will be some headcanons too

So, there are still some odds about them, due to the strong difference in their occupation, like, in plenty of cases they are really tricky to be brought together, because:

- Of the job

In original, Anko is a Konoha’s special jounin, and she is very dedicated to serving the country. Independently of whether she likes her job or not (depends on the plot), she orienteers at the people, at society’s gain from her work. So, accordingly, in any other AU her job is somehow connected to civil service, whether it’s something police-like, connected to science, or something like CCG in Tokyo Ghoul

Kakuzu, on the other hand, is a hitman and a persona non grata in literally all the five big countries, Konoha too (which makes it barely possible to bring them together in the original universe without hard complications or heavy drama. But still possible). He orienteers on his own gain alone, but, depending on the job, it can include others’ gain, too.

This detail makes him a saint once he holds supervising position in some company or any high position in the government (the better the working conditions of the staff now- the more money in the prospective), and the sheer nightmare once he has it on the opposite side of the law. Him as a mob boss is a complete different topic for discussion, but to get the point, in this case, the trouble isn’t him increasing the level of criminality (its rather vice-versa), but taking hold of too much control in the high and underground structures. Even as an ordinary hitman he’s rather tricky, since everything depends on the case

In most of the stories, they come to some sort of compromise, and how hard it is to reach it depends on how shitty his job is and how attached they are to each other at the moment

Like, in the above mentioned Shippuden AU and Harry Potter AU (which I also wrote with my buddy) everything went like clockwork, because there they are both more or less on this side of the law, in Tokyo Ghoul AU (which I also wrote with my buddy) it is a bit more complicated, with her being in-law and him being very much outlaw, in the Avatar AU (which I also figured out with my buddy, but we never happened to write it) it is also pretty smooth, with both of them being outlaws and then jumping out to the glory after all the shit is done, but in another Shippuden AU of mine, this all would be just a motherfucking bloody disaster

- Kakuzu is actually a hard nut to get attached to anyone

He lived too long to be truly afraid of anything, though. Its mostly because he doesn’t really need to get attached to or become close with someone to satisfy his need for communication. The man can get along with anyone once he wishes to, he can have countless acquaintances and plenty of buddies, but he doesn’t have many comrades and barely can call anyone a friend. Because he is used to lose everything and everyone he ever had or happened to have, because of his inhumanly lengthened lifespan.

It requires time for him to get used to the person, and then, eventually, in some cases, spend plenty of it to get attached

Plus, for him, due to his profession, each close connection is a really great responsibility for him. In most cases, he’d think twice of weather he is ready to take it or not

Though it of course has the personal factor, too

In Anko’s case, she has a grand privilege by being a very intelligent and keen woman, not just in cognitive plane, but in emotional, too. High emotional intellect is actually a rare trait, so she automatically stands out of the crowd for him. Even though it won’t guarantee his alliance, it will grant her his high respect and some sort of sympathy

- Kakuzu is, technically, an asshole

He does have his moral compass, which includes a great amount of common social morality, but he also has that “I am working” state

Even though Kakusu has a set of professional principles, and he still acts accordingly to what he thinks is right, one and the very same situation can be solved diametrically different once the context changes from working to casual and vice versa

This, and him being very independent and quite antisocial, makes the degree of assholeness depend on various factors

This can lead to major conflicts of interests, and if they are possible to have any compromise or not is strongly attached to the circumstances. After all, both are very, very prideful and dignified people

- In other words, the only major issue for them would be morality questions. It’s possible to make the case acceptable for Anko, since both of them ain��t truly squeaky clean, along with Kakuzu being willing enough to watch his borders

- She is provident and doesn’t really need a lot of money on a daily basis, which is much of a joy to him lol

- *they both seek for the stable ground, first of all

Taking in consideration the life conditions Kakuzu had in his youth (despite war state, he still stably had family, friends, grand respect from everyone, home, warmth and food) and how terribly he was torn out of his secured social environment, I believe what he seeks through all his bounty hunt and other money-connected manipulations is stability. Sustainability he had back then. The only way to have it in the conditions of our existent world order is to have money (and a very good mind and luck)

Anko has indeed much more altruistic motives, yet it’s still not that simple. It seems to be, on the first sight, yet considering the “Orochimaru related cases” and her very wayward behavior toward them, it’s clear she keeps her own motives and needs in mind oh so well. The service she has is very well payed, it allows her to do what she likes or believes is right, and to have the living conditions she finds comfortable. And only here, relying on the made sustainable basis, she does what she does

- Thus, they both illustrate the principle “first help yourself, next help the other” just right

- She knows she can keep an eye on him, yet it’s clear for her that her influence isn’t borderless, as well as telling him off some stuff is kind of a not wise thing to do. So in the majority of cases, she never interferes

- This is not common, yet he can actually change some plans if the situation is serious and the compromise can’t be found. He is that kind of person who works on a further prospective, and in this context, this would be the relationship with his loved one

- While Kakuzu is quite conflicted and has very reserved controversial persona, Anko is both controversial, conflicted, and sort of two-faced, on top of that

She is a very sincere, cheerful and humbly honest human being, yet she has some darker natural traits of her character that became rather strong with age and traumatic experience. Cunningness, guile, ways-depend-on-the-case and a bit of ruthlessness, that is. Moreover, she has some unsolved personal issues, which makes her even more twisted.

Like, remember the time when she confronted Orochimaru during the exam? And Kabuto, on the war? Getting rid of them is indeed beneficial for Konoha, but it’s clear that for her it is personal vendetta in the first place. She wouldn’t have tried to do this alone, otherwise, because these two are rather dangerous ones, to say the least.

She uses greater good to cover her real motives (even though it is not truly complete bullshit), and seems to have a terrible habit to keep silence about really important things, which makes her quite prone to lying, in some cases

And sometimes it very badly pisses Kakuzu off, since it makes her prone to doing useless but dangerous shit too

Yet this not any kind of separate hidden side, it is integrated into her personality, and coexists with her bright one. That’s where her violent humour comes from, for example.

But Kakuzu, on the other side, is completely monolith individual, yet sometimes his mindset can create contradictions when it comes to something important to him. but it's another topic

And seeing these layered constructions, and motives, they can pretty finely predict each other’s behavior. Not super-neatly, but they for sure see the basis. This is what helps Kakuzu to prevent Anko from doing some stupid shit, sometimes

- Anko has a role of an indicator for the people who don’t understand and see the changes in Kakuzu’s mood sometimes, since she usually reacts quite openly. Yet, when she has the same unreadable mask of cold, or one of guile, it’s a nightmare for them

- They prefer the non-verbal way to show their feelings, even though Anko is obviously the more chatty one

- They don’t say things such as “I love you”, or other sensual stuff like that really often, believing it to be some sort of cherished words that shall not be spelled mindlessly

- Anko isn’t majorly into PDA, but she fancies it much more than Kakuzu does. She has her whole moments of studying something with her hands, whether it’s a hand, scar or face. He’s more into passive display of affection, like wrapping an arm over her waist or leaning to her or something of this kind; they can allow themselves to (not sexually) kiss in public though

- She knows he doesn’t like to walk hand in hand due to considering it a youthful thing, so there are times when she intentionally walks holding on to his sleeve; generally they walk separately in order not to bother each other, but sometimes they walk arm in arm (like an old Victorian couple lol)

- Being older and wiser, Kakuzu eventually upholds some kind of mentoring position, yet he never considers himself any kind of a teacher or master to Anko, believing her to have a good head of her own. He is just insightful enough to break something through to her or give a word of advise

- This, combined with his highly powerful demeanor, also makes him have the leading position in their relationship

- Anko respects him much enough to fortify this, entrusting with plenty of life questions (like organizing the family budget), even though they make the majority of decisions together. Mostly because he is truly wise and highly experienced individual.

- This makes him one of the very few people Anko would actually listen to and take their opinion in consideration

- So basically they have equal relationship with some tendency to patriarchal order

- And it is, really, mostly economically-based disbalance, with him earning much more than she does

- Yet they never have any financial-based issues, since both of them keep in mind and respect the contributions of each

- There is major power play here, too. He has the absolute might, she has seduction. Anko loves how he makes her want to submit to him, let him have all the power, so she likes provoking him. And she knows he adores it, loves the subtle control she has over him

- They don’t have conflicts in their everyday life. Each knows how to avoid pissing one another off

- He cherishes her playful demeanor, her intellect. Combined with her cunningness, it allows her to rival him, in social sphere. The way she constructs her phrases, the way she speaks, mimics, moves, how bewitchingly it suits her feminine snaky features makes his blood boil and heart melt

- Both of them, actually, have rather specific kind of dry, dark humour. Kakuzu’s is very cynical, satirical, quite often menacing and subtly demeaning; Anko’s is very sarcastic and quite dirty, even gruesome and rather violent

- Sometimes they “fight” verbally as a form of a play. In some circumstances they may sound pretty vile, so some unobservant people mistake this for display of hate

- In general, Anko is the one to heat things up with her playful demeanor, which can include provocation and rivalry, and Kakuzu is the one to keep this energy in borders, accumulating it up to much more intense states

- They both put the comfort in the first place when it comes to household. Everything must be cozy, useful, silent and super clean

- Yet they are both very unpretentious and modest, really

- She absolutely adores when he is showing his serious, severe side, or powerful demeanor. She finds it incredibly suitable for him. She also likes how his real age is sliding out in this or that way. Like, even though he has rather young face (that of 37-40 y.o.), his eyes give away that he’ve seen oh so much more than it seems; the grumpy noises and grunts he makes, the lazy attitude in movements and the way how rapidly he finds a comfy pose once he has a chance to take a seat

- They are both rather patriotic, yet while in the most stories Anko’s feelings mostly lay towards the country she lives in, Kakuzu’s more often lay towards some places, so called small motherland.

- Kakuzu actually could be a source of deep, strong admiration and delight for her, despite all of his bullshit. The unbreakable will he has, mighty burning heart, all the wisdom, talents and mind. Being sent to fight god damn Hashirama, clearly a genius of his times, financial & management genius at the least. And, still, after all the hard times he’ve been through, he maintained the very strong sense of dignity and nobility, even though slightly twisted due to the profession and abnormal lifespan

- And the very same things can serve as the source for her chagrin: with all those traits, he could have been so much more rather than a criminal. With all the gifts he’ve got, he could have been of great use to society. He’s much easier about this, since his prospective is much wider and embraces decades (and in some universes even centuries) instead of months & years, and he knows that he’d be switching sides throughout his life, being on this and that side of the law, yet he still is a bit uncomfortable once it’s brought up

- They are deeply into science, which makes them atheists. He’s into medicine and human biology, she’s into chemistry and reptilian biology; both of them are nuts for physics, history and psychology

- They solve complicated physical and mathematical problems together time to time. She is the first one to have tea-breaks due to losing her temper over it, he tries to figure things out right until you can sense the smoke coming off his head

- Actually, they do have a stumbling stone aside from job & morality complications. And this is Anko’s attitude towards Orochimaru

What she does is basically ruins her life very-very slowly, maintaining the issues she has and planning to make him pay for all he’s done

Kakuzu knows exactly what is really going on with this attitude and why, but he can’t really do anything about it. Like, he knows he can’t make her change her mind or put something into her head

All he can do is really nothing but try to explain how those things are working, and even this option is basically a landmine field for him. At some level she does understand that he could probably be right, yet she just refuses to go back on her mind. And this is actually really dangerous, so at some moments they can fight quite badly about it

- He’s scared shitless to lose her, though; especially like that, even though he knows clearly that he will, anyway, sooner or later

- he knows that losing loved ones ends up with sheer disaster for him, yet he isn’t afraid to pay such a high price for those six, five or four decades of being with her. Because these decades are that of a paradise ones for him. Wife and family, as well as stable job, incomes and life conditions, are some sort of physical definitions of sustainability he craves. Especially family, yet it’s far ahead to plan

- The fact that he will have to bury her one day makes her rather depressed, as well as the knowledge that the only thing she can really do about it is to try to bring him as much happiness and comfort as possible before she dies

thank you, i'd say more, but it's too much already

#my art #naruto #naruto shipuden #akatsuki #naruto akatsuki #akatsuki kakuzu #kakuzu #naruto anko #mitarashi anko #kakuanko #they are very entertaining disaster

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stylesluxx · 4 years

Text

imprint – p.lahote

[warnings: angst, swearing, an anxiety attack]

summary: in which y/n thinks it's just the imprint talking | part two

word count: 6,171

masterlist

"Long night?"

You sighed and turned around to face your best friend. You've known Jacob for as long as you can remember. You went to the same schools (you begged your parents to keep you together) and his house was a two-minute walk from yours.

"Very," You nodded and turned back around to shove your chemistry textbook in your locker.

"I can't believe you spend your nights looking through this stupid textbook."

"I can't believe you think it's okay to bother me at 8 AM," You retorted playfully and shut your locker.

"Don't be friends with me then," He shrugged and wrapped an arm around your shoulder as you started walking to your first class.

"I hope those two idiots are on time."

"Embry and Quil? On-time? Come on, Y/N, let's be realistic here."

You laughed and shook your head as you walked into your Spanish class. You happily greeted your teacher and sat in your usual spot in the middle of the class. Jake took the seat next to you and you looked over at the empty seats Quil and Embry would later occupy.

The bell rang, signifying the start of the first period and you felt Jacob move to take your backpack off your back.

"You really must be tired," He chuckled and set the bag next to your seat.

"You have no idea," You yawned and put your hand up to cover your mouth.

Quil and Embry ran into the room, panting and heaving, right after the morning announcements ceased.

"Typical," You mumbled.

They apologized to the teacher for disrupting the class before moving to their seats. As they walked in front of your table, you stuff a foot out and watched Quil trip and push Embry forward involuntarily.

"Watch it, you clumsy idiot!" Embry whisper-yelled, making you giggle.

"It was Y/N's fault. She tripped me," Quil argued as they both took their seats.

Quil and Embry were a package deal. One summer you went to Boston to visit some family and when you came back, Jacob had made some new friends. At the age of eight, you were used to having Jacob all to yourself but the two idiots refused to leave you alone once you came back just in time for school. The two boys grew on you fairly quickly (they brought you candy every day to get on your good side) and the four of you grew super close, they were practically your brothers.

You glanced around the classroom to see if anyone was distracted by the two idiots but at this point, no one bothered paying the two any attention.

You noticed there was one empty seat left and you realized the spot belonged to Paul Lahote.

Paul Lahote was an enigma. Well, only to you. Everyone knew he was hotheaded and cocky but there was something about him that pulled you in. As deluded as it sounded, you believed there to be another side to Paul Lahote.

You looked away from the empty seat and fixed your eyes on the classroom door opening and closing. There he was, in all his glory.

Jacob scoffed and rolled his eyes as he watched you become entranced in the boy you had a crush on.

"Still don't know what you see in him," Jacob whispered.

"I have a thing for unrequited love," You shrugged.

Paul would usually walk in with a boastful smirk on his face but today it was replaced with a frown and his eyebrows were furrowed in discomfort.

He quietly talked to the teacher and handed her a note. She nodded and took the piece of paper from him, setting it on her desk.

He kept his head down as he trudged over to his seat by the window and sat down. His head immediately met the table, his arms in between his head and the desk to give him some comfort.

"Have you guys ever thought about setting alarms?"

You scoffed at this question that was directed toward Embry and Quil. It was lunchtime and your hand was moving fast, trying to finish your Spanish homework so you wouldn't have to waste time doing it at home.

"Ashley, do you think they've ever even heard of alarm clocks?" You questioned.

Ashley was first introduced to the group during freshman year. She was new to La Push but had no issue walking up to you and asking for a friend.

"I figured since it's the first day, we could just be each other's comfort," She shrugged.

Of course, she didn't know about the boys but she was soon introduced to them during gym class. Quil embarrassingly kicked a ball directly in her face, causing her to turn red, clearly infuriated.

"Of course this happens on the first day," You sighed and ran over to her. "Are you okay? I'm really sorry about my friend. He was born uncoordinated."

"Yeah, no kidding," She huffed and rubbed her red cheek that was beginning to swell.

She was still making Quil pay for the incident. Every time she wanted something from him, she'd milk the remind him of "the most tragic moment in La Push history."

She wanted him to get lunch for her?

"Quil, remember when you almost shattered my face? Well, I do. It was the first day of high school. Can you go get me lunch?”

He’d just sigh and shake his head before standing up and doing whatever she asked.

While Embry and Quil argued over whose fault it was that they were always late, Ashley turned to you, head on palm and elbow on the table.

"So how's day one million of crushing on Paul Lahote?" She teased and of course, Jacob just rolled his eyes.

You reached over and tugged at his long hair gently, making him swat your hand away.

"Day one million of my ordinary life is going great," You nodded with a smile.

"You do realize, he's just your typical arrogant asshole, correct?" Embry spoke up.

"Well, it's not like I'll ever have to deal with it. As if he'd even think about talking to me," You blew a raspberry and scooped up a spoonful of the rice sitting on your plate.

"Speak of the devil," Ashley grinned and elbowed your ribs, making you jolt up from your sulking position.

You watched as he practically dragged himself over to the lunch line and grabbed a tray.

Any other day you'd watch his pretty brown eyes follow around the prettiest girls at school and give them a wink. Any other day, your heart would drop to your ass and you'd sigh in defeat. But today his bright smile stayed hidden and you watched as he scowled uncomfortably.

"Looks like someone's in a bad mood today," Quil observed.

"Oh, thank you, Captain Obvious. What was the giveaway?" Ashley quipped, her and Quil rolling their eyes at the same time.

"You guys realize he's human and can have a bad day, right?" You asked and watched him flop into a seat at an empty table.

"Oh really? I would've thought he was a god the way he walked around here," Jacob spoke sarcastically while chewing his food.

"He's just... misunderstood."

—

Days went by and Paul just stopped coming to school. The day after he came in looking out of place, he came to school two periods in, and then the day after that he just left school early. That was the last time you saw him.

For the first couple of days, you looked for him but after a week, you just gave up. Weeks went by and there was no sign of him, you just hoped that he was okay.

"Still have hope your little boyfriend isn't a high school dropout?" Jacob teased as he saw you look over at Paul's empty seat.

"Are you obsessed with him?" You rolled your eyes and hit his water bottle obnoxiously, knocking it down. "You guys always bring him up. Are you sure you're not the one crushing on him?”

"Don't disrespect me. If I was interested in guys, it definitely wouldn't be Lahote; I love myself enough."

You rolled your eyes again and scoffed before telling him to “just shut up.”

Once the bell finished ringing, Embry and Quil rushed in claiming they weren't late. Quil learned to walk behind your table instead of in front and tugged at your hair.

"Jackass," You mumbled and rubbed your head.

15 minutes into the lesson, the door opened and shut but you didn't bother to lift your head until you heard the voice.

"I apologize for being late," He spoke smoothly and your head whipped up in shock.

You watched the boy hand a note to the teacher with a smug grin on his face.

"Look what the cat dragged in," Jacob mumbled and raised an eyebrow.

"He looks much better," You mumbled back as you watched him confidently walk through the classroom and claim his seat.

"Yeah, and he got all muscly and tall. How do you gain that much height so quickly?"

"And you're sure you don't have a crush on him?"

But Jacob was right. When Paul disappeared he was scrawny and 5'11" but now he was muscular and at least 6'4". And was that a tattoo? He wore a shirt that showed off his muscles and a tattoo that wasn't there when he disappeared.

Once Spanish class let out everyone rushed out the classroom and in the doorway, you spotted Jared Cameron. Paul walked out ahead of you and met Jared, punching his shoulder playfully and laughing at whatever his newfound friend had said.

And now that you saw the two together, you remembered that Jared too disappeared earlier that year. He was in your second-period math class and one day he was there and the next he wasn't. He also looked sick the days leading up to his absence and came back taller and muscular. You looked closely and saw they both had the same tattoo in the same spot.

"Don't stare too hard, Creep," You heard Embry's voice.

You shoved him away before turning around and walking to your next period.

The day slowly dragged on and before you knew it you were in chemistry, the dreadful class right before lunch. You listened to your teacher drone on and on about something you didn't understand. By the end of the lesson you realized you'd have to skip lunch to get some help, so you sent the group chat a quick text before grabbing your things and moving to the front of the classroom. You sat down and politely asked the teacher for help, which she happily agreed to.

You were in the middle of balancing a formula when you heard feet shuffling into the classroom.

"Do you mind if I pick up some of the work I missed? It's all been excused."

"Sure, Paul. Let me head upstairs and grab it from my office. Just wait here," The teacher said and stood up from the chair. "And keep going Y/N, you're doing great!"

You nodded and kept your eyes on your paper as she retreated from the classroom. You finished the problem you were on and started working on the next one but you were stumped. This problem was nothing like the first and different rules had to be applied.

"I can't," You muttered to yourself and tossed your pencil down on the desk.

You pulled away from the desk and raised your head to look at the board in front of you but your eyes met another pair.

You weren't expecting Paul to be leaning against the board directly in front of you, his arms crossed over his chest. He must've looked over when he heard you speak and your eyes met coincidentally.

You gave him a forced and awkward smile when you realized he wasn't looking away. His arms fell to his sides and his mouth gaped as he continued to stare.

"Uh, are you alright?" You asked him and gave him a concerned look.

Before he could answer, the chem teacher came back in the room with a stack of papers in her hands. Paul quickly turned his attention to her, grabbed the papers, and whispered a soft thank you before bolting out of the room.

You felt your cheeks grow hot in embarrassment and turned your focus back to the paper in front of you.

For the rest of the day, you tried to push that moment to the back of your mind. You couldn't believe that was your first encounter with Paul. You were so embarrassed you weren't even going to tell your friends because you knew you'd never hear the end of it.

The rest of the day and into the next goes completely uneventful until it's time for lunch.

You were at your locker with Jacob, switching out notebooks and binders, teasing him about how he was drooling in his sleep during first period.

"You were snoring too," You lied, trying to get a reaction out of him.

"You are such a liar. What do you even gain from lying?"

You laughed and went to respond but were cut off by the view of Paul Lahote walking in your direction. He turned to look at Jared who just shooed him over with a hand motion, before turning back around, his eyes on you.

You ignored Jacob trying to regain your attention and gave Paul a gentle smile and prayed you wouldn't embarrass yourself.

"Hi, I'm Paul. Lahote. Paul Lahote. I've never really introduced myself which is weird because you're... stunning and we're in the same grade and I think we have some classes together," He babbled on nervously, making your eyebrows crinkle while you tried to keep up with what he was saying.

"I'm Y/N," You cut off his rambling and reached your hand out for him to shake.

He looked at it for a second before looking back at you with a smile and reaching his hand out to meet yours. You stood like this for a few moments, your hand in his and his eyes on you in awe.

Jacob cleared his throat and pulled Paul out of his trance as he turned to glare at Jacob, dropping your hand in the process.

"Is there something you needed?" You saved Jacob from Paul's death glare with this question.

Paul's head snapped toward you and he started to grow red in embarrassment or nervousness, you couldn't tell.

"I was, uh, I was wondering if you'd go on a date with me?"

You lightly gasped, unnoticeable to anyone but you, and your eyes slightly widened.

"O-oh wow," You mumbled and bent your head to look at the binder in your hands, trying to avoid the three sets of eyes on you. You felt the heat rise to your face and a shy smile grow. You weren't used to this type of attention especially from the boy you've been crushing on for three years, so you were a mix of nervous and shocked and happy. You were feeling everything at once.

"Only if you want to!" He started to backtrack when you didn't give him an answer.

You looked back up at him and shook your head at his words but you realized it looked like you were rejecting him when his face started to fall, disheartened.

"No! I mean, no, I don't mean no. I mean yes, I'll go on a date with you," You stammered, trying to clear everything up.

"Okay cool," He nodded and his pretty smile returned to his face. "I'll pick you up Saturday at noon?"

"Yeah, okay, sounds good."

"Okay cool," He repeated before walking away, making sure to give you a shy wave as he went toward Jared.

"What... the hell was that?" Jacob broke his silence and looked at you wide-eyed as you kept your eyes on Paul's retreating figure.

"Looks like I got a date."

—

The days leading up to your date had to be the most delightful days you've ever experienced while in high school.

On Wednesday morning, you were greeted by a smiley Paul who was leaning against your locker.

"Good morning," You smiled as he moved off your locker and leaned on the one next to yours.

"Morning! I thought I'd walk you to first period."

"Oh wow, you'll be early to class today," You teased, making him laugh and nod.

On Thursday, Paul walked you to class again; of course, you weren't complaining, you'd take any opportunity to talk to him. On this day, he met you at the doorway of the chem room and walked you to the cafeteria.

You thanked him as he opened the door for you and got hot in the face when you saw Ashley give you a wink and a thumbs up from the lunch table.

He kept you company as you waited in the lunch line and separated once you sat at your table, softly bidding you a good rest of the day.

And on Friday, everything was repeated but with a new addition.

Paul was waiting for you in the lobby and usually, Jacob would be trailing behind you but it was boys night for the boys and girls night for you and Ashley. So Jacob was catching a ride with Embry and Quil and Ashley was already waiting by your Jeep.

"Do you just want my schedule so you won't have to wait longer than you need to?" You asked him with a playful smirk.

"Then I'd officially be stalking you," He played along and followed you outside. He took your umbrella from your hands, opened it, and held it over your head to shield you from the rain.

"Are you always such a gentleman?" You giggled and looked up at him, his eyes already set on you and filled with admiration. "And it's not stalking if I want to be pursued."

"Oh really?" He raised an eyebrow.

You turned away and gave Ashley a quick smile once you reached the car.

"Do you need a ride?" You asked the boy next to you, turning back to face him.

"No, I've got a ride with Jared. But I'll see you tomorrow?"

"Can't wait," You confirmed and took the umbrella from his hands.

You shut the umbrella and got in the car as Paul walked over to Jared. You set the umbrella on the floor in the back and your backpack on the seat. Ashley followed your lead and punched your shoulder in excitement.

"Stop it," You whined and rubbed your shoulder.

As you pulled out of the parking spot, you drove by Paul and gave him one last wave before driving home to start the weekend.

Paul arrived the next day at exactly noon. When you heard the doorbell ring throughout the house, you sprinted down the stairs to make sure neither of your parents got there before you. You already told them you were going out with a friend earlier in the week but they assumed it was one of the dorks you usually spent your time with and you let them think that. You didn't want to introduce them to Paul just for things to not work out. It even took you a while to introduce them to Ashley. People meeting your parents is a sacred thing, a rite of passage if you will.

"You look gorgeous. You are gorgeous!" He greeted you with a bright smile.

"Thank you, though I'm just wearing jeans and a sweatshirt," You shrugged and shut the door behind you. "No offense, but you look tired. Did you get any sleep last night?"

"Oh no, it's okay," He shook his head and his eyes fell toward the ground while he thought of a response. "I just was anxious about the date is all. Couldn't really sleep much."

He walked you over to his truck and opened the door for you, which you thanked him for, before going over to the driver's side. "Oh, I'm sorry to hear that. Try to get some rest tonight. Some tea usually helps me. I'll give you a couple of my relaxation teabags when you bring me back home. Just remind me," You spoke softly while giving him a concerned look. "Will do," He nodded and pulled out of your driveway.

He brought you to your favorite diner in all of Washington and was super polite. He was opening the doors for you, pulling out your seat, and even paid for the meal even though you argued against it. And though he was tired, he was clinging onto every word you said, leaning in to show he was interested. "Is that your favorite food?" He asked once the waiter took your orders. "No, but I do enjoy it," You shrugged. "What's your favorite food then?" "I like any kind of pasta," You said after pondering for a moment. "Spaghetti, ravioli, lasagna, and anything else." And that's how it went the whole time. Paul would ask you questions, trying to get to know you in any way possible and you'd answer and ask him questions.

It was fun, there was never a dull moment, and even when things were getting quiet, he'd crack a joke that'd make you burst into laughter. It was the perfect date in your eyes; he was so polite and caring or maybe it was just you giving your crush more credit than he deserved, but that still didn't change how you felt.

When Monday came around, Paul was at your locker and classes, waiting for you and walking with you. At lunch, he was standing by your chem class with a Tupperware bowl in his hand and a nervous demeanor.

"Hey, what's that?" You asked and pointed to the bowl he was gripping onto tightly.

"I, uh, I brought you pasta. It's spaghetti. You said that pasta was your favorite food so I kinda made you some. Well, I helped make it," He nervously stumbled over his words, making you giggle. You stopped walking once you got to your table and he held his arms straight out, handing the bowl to you. "Here you go."

You felt the heat rise to your face once again and you took the bowl from him. You glanced down at the bowl before looking back up at him and pulling him into a hug.

"This was so beyond thoughtful. Thank you so much," You praised him and rubbed his back with your free hand. You pulled away and held the bowl up to your eyes so you could see the food. You set your hands back by your waist again and locked eyes with his, both sets of eyes filled with amazement. "This was so sweet."

"Anything for you," He nodded.

"I'll give it back to you right after lunch. I promise," You told him and held out a pinky.

He chuckled and grabbed onto your pinky with his own, "I believe you."

He let go of you and walked off to sit with Jared but you kept your eyes on him and watched his friend grab onto his shoulders and shake him happily.

You turned to your table and sat down, already replaying what just happened in your mind.

"Wow," Embry started.

"I've never seen you that cheesy before," Jacob chortled.

"I've never seen Paul that cheesy before," Quil scoffed. "So are you gonna share that?" He asked and pointed to your bowl.

"Anyway, Y/N, how was the date?" Ashley asked, pulling your attention from the boys.

"Oh it was great, he was very sweet! I like him. I told you guys he's not bad like everyone makes him out to be," You swooned at the thought of how you spent your Saturday.

"It's like he can hear you, that stupid grin won't leave his face," Embry observed, making you turn your head to look at Paul.

"So what if he's happy? Y/N's happy," Ashley regained your attention and you nodded at her statement.

"Very happy."

Once you finished up the spaghetti, you excused yourself from the table and went to go rinse it out. You walked over to Jared and Paul's table; Jared was the first to notice since Paul's back was toward you and pointed at you. You gave him a small smile before turning your attention to Paul.

"The food was really good. I rinsed the bowl out but of course, you'll have to wash it when you get home. Thank you again though," You spoke gratefully and handed the bowl back to him.

He took the bowl from you and then you proceeded to lean down and peck his cheek before scurrying back to your table in shock by your actions.

"This is a proud moment for me," Ashley feigned tears and held a hand over her chest, making you laugh.

—

For weeks it seemed like the joy Paul brought to your life was never-ending.

You've gone on a couple more dates which you thoroughly enjoyed. He took you to the movies but fell asleep within the first five minutes. You laughed quietly and shook your head as you rested on his shoulder.

He explained to you how he sometimes has to work overnight shifts at his job, so you didn't fault him for being tired. You tried to cancel the dates and get him to catch up on his sleep, but he insisted on spending time with you, making you adore him even more.

The two of you were in Port Angeles for the next date and while it was freezing, you were both sitting on a bench outside eating ice cream.

"You're not cold?" You looked at Paul as you shivered.

"No, are you?" He asked and you nodded your head quickly. "Come on, let's go sit in my truck."

You stood up and he wrapped an arm around your shoulders. You leaned into his warmth and hummed happily at the feeling of him.

He opened the door to his truck and helped you get in then shut the door behind you. He got in on the driver's side, turned the car on, and turned the heat on.

"You have that big coat on and you're still cold?" He teased.

"You only have a sweatshirt on and still feel hotter than the sun."

He laughed and watched you lean back in the seat and go back to eating your ice cream. You felt his eyes on you for a while but you kept your eyes on the rain that started to fall outside.

"You know, you could always just ask to take a picture," You teased, looking at him from your peripheral vision.

"Okay." He took his phone from his pocket and faced it toward you. "Smile!"

You turned to him enthusiastically and gave him a big childlike smile before giving him a regular one.

"Let me see," You softly demanded, losing the rush of confidence you just had.

He turned the screen to you and showed you the pictures.

"You're so beautiful," He complimented as he set his new screensaver as a picture of you. The heat automatically rose to your cheeks and giggled happily.

"I could say the same."

You looked up at him and met his eyes, your heart racing, and your stomach full of butterflies.

"Do you mind if I kiss you?" He asked politely, looking from your eyes to your lips, and then back.

"No, not at all," You slightly shook your head and leaned in closer.

He filled in the rest of the space and his lips gently landed on yours. He set his phone down and both of his hands reached up to cup your face. With your eyes shut, you focused on the kiss and how soft his lips were; you knew you were instantly addicted, not wanting to pull away. But you had to breathe, so when you pulled away, you gave him one last peck before coyly turning around to face the windshield and finish your ice cream.

"That was perfect."

—

Paul arrived at your house a week later, pulling you by your hand energetically into the woods.

"Paul, where are we going?" You giggled as you held onto his hand while stepping over a log.

"We're going to the beach but I have to tell you something. Well... show you something. That's why we're walking."

"Oh okay, what is it?"

"So, you've heard the Quileute legends, I'm sure" He started and pushed a tree branch out of the way. "Jacob has probably told you. But what if I told you it was real? And I'm a shapeshifter?"

"Uh, I'd probably laugh," You chuckled and looked up at him.

"Well, it's true. I can, uh, I can show you if you'd like," He stammered nervously and rubbed the back of your hand with his thumb.

You raised your eyebrows and nodded hesitantly. He pulled his hand from yours and backed up. He shook his head as he kicked his shoes off and stripped out of his clothes.

"Paul?" You questioned.

"Just trust me. I need you to know that I'd never hurt you," He said before he started shaking and getting red all over.

Your eyes widened and your feet moved backward to get some more distance as he leaped into the air and was suddenly on all fours.

"Paul?" You said once more but shakier.

In front of you stood a huge dark silver wolf that was five times larger than your boyfriend that previously stood in front of you. At first, he was intimidating but then once he noticed your frightened expression, he started whining and the wolf tried to come closer.

You wanted to step back but you remember he said he'd never hurt you, so you tried to relax your mind and reached a hand up to pet his head.

He snuggled into your palm and huffed happily. You let out a breath of relief and giggled when he licked your cheek.

"My Paul," You nodded, coming to terms with what is.

He reluctantly pulls away from your touch and goes over to where he left his clothes. He picked his shorts up in his mouth before walking away and going behind a tree somewhere.

You assumed he needed to change back so you grabbed his shirt and sneakers off the ground, but stayed put otherwise.

He jogged back over to you in his human form, already holding his hand out for you to take. You latched onto his hand and he took his sneakers out your hands, but let you keep his shirt.

"So do you believe me?" He asked, sarcasm laced in his voice, as he pulled you along toward the beach.

You nodded but asked the question that sat in the front of your mind. "Does it hurt when you..?" You trailed off, not knowing the right term.

"When I shift?" He finished. "It used to hurt a lot like my whole body was on fire but now it just feels like little pinches all over my body."

"I don't like that, Paul," You frowned and shook your head at the thought of him being in any type of pain.

"Oh, me either, Darling," He said while pulling you closer and kissing your forehead. "Also, you can't tell anyone. Not even Jacob. It's imperative that you don't."

"Okay," You nodded obediently before demonstrating you zipping your mouth closed and tossing the keys somewhere in the trees.

"Silly girl," He smiled.

"And what about Jared?"

"He shifts too. Along with Sam Uley. I'm sure you know him; La Push is only so big. We think Jacob might be next. Him or Embry."

"There's nothing they can do to stop it?" You asked him, worried for your friends.

"If the lee-" He cut himself off. "Sadly, no. If they seem a little off to you, a little more on edge than usual, tell me. And try to get some distance, I don't want you getting hurt if they shift."

You slipped your sneakers off once you got to the beach along with your socks and stuff them into the shoes. You insisted that you sat right there the water would be able to touch your feet but still far enough where your clothes jeans stayed dry.

Paul dragged you out of the house while you were only wearing a tank top on your upper body, so the beach air sent chills throughout your body. You pulled on Paul's plain brown shirt and leaned against him, your own personal heater.

"So being this warm is a wolf thing?" You inquired.

"Yeah," He nodded. "There's also something called imprinting."

"And what's that?"

Paul looked around to see if anyone was close enough to hear but it was 8:00 PM, no one would be here unless it was one of the boys.

"Basically it's like a soulmate; a soulmate mixed with love at first sight. After phasing, I was able to imprint. It was completely involuntary, I didn't have a choice. When you see the person, your person, it's like nothing else matters. They're the reason you've been put on this earth. It's your job to protect them. be whatever they want you to be. A friend, a lover. You just will do anything for them. It hurts to be away from them for too long. You hurt when they hurt," Paul explained while keeping his eyes on the moon ahead of him.

"You know the feeling?" You hesitantly asked while turning to look over at him. You didn't want to ask in case you weren't his imprint but the curiosity took over and you needed to know.

"I imprinted on you. You're my imprint," He confirmed.

"Oh," You breathed out and turned to look at the water that gently touched your toes.

You received a lot of information today. And then to find out that Paul imprinted on you gave you a lot of mixed emotions. You were happy that you found the person you're supposed to be with forever but now you were looking at the whole relationship differently.

"So when did you phase?" You asked, keeping your eyes down.

"You remember when I was out of school for a bit?"

"Mhm," You hummed quietly and nodded.

"That's when. I imprinted on you that day you were getting help in the chem room."

"So..." You trailed off, trying to think of the exact words you wanted to say. "You only asked me out because you imprinted on me?"

"Yes," He answered quickly but then shook his head when he realized what you were trying to get at. "No, I mean no. It's not like that."

"I've had a crush on you since freshman year. I thought you'd finally noticed me and wanted me for me, but I guess it's only because of the imprint," You humorlessly chuckled and held your knees to your chest.

"No, Y/N, it's not like that-"

"Think about it, Paul. You've never noticed me before and our school is so tiny; La Push is only so big like you said. Everyone knows everyone and you still didn't notice me. You would've never even breathed in my direction had it not been for the imprint. I'm only beautiful, or gorgeous... or stunning, because the imprint tells you I am. You don't really think that and you don't really like me. Be honest with yourself," You ranted but still had a soft and gentle voice.

"Y/N..."

"I want to be with someone who chooses to love me. You are forced to love me," You sniffled and wiped your nose with your hand.

It was silent for a while after that and you just let the tears fall down your face. Somewhere deep down you knew everything with Paul was all too good to be true but you ignored it. You believed you were finally getting the fairytale story you deserved. But this wasn't it. It was like some twisted joke the universe was playing on you. And you just wanted someone to hold you. You wanted Paul to hold you and tell you everything would be alright. Despite how you were feeling, you still felt a sense of safety and home around him. But you couldn't fall into that anymore. You were now full-on bawling your eyes out and hiccuping while trying to keep the sobs from escaping your body.

"For your sake, l-let's still be friends. But for m-my sake, very distant friends-"

"Y/N, please-"

"Goodbye, Paul."

You stood up quickly and grabbed your shoes, trudging through the sand. You let a sob escape your mouth once you were a distance away. You felt it getting harder to breathe, so you picked up the pace, wanting to get to your destination before you passed out. There was only one place you could think of going that gave you the same warmth and homeliness you felt in Paul's arms. Jacob's.

[AN: omg I’m so nervous about posting this but I’ve been working on it for weeks and I’m really proud of it. thanks for reading!]

#stylesluxx #paul lahote #twilight #paul lahote imagine #paul lahote x reader #twilight x reader #twilight imagine #wolf pack imagine #Paul Lahote angst #Paul lahote fluff #wolfpack

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enigmawrappedinhypocrisy · 3 years

Text

*Request* Okay. Thanks! Could the reader be in to wrestling and her and barley are best friends? And something happened and they find out they’re falling for each other? And Ian is always teasing the reader? And a kiss at the end? Sorry if it’s a bit confusing.. again thanks!

Okay I’m not sure how to do this… and I’m not into wrestling… And i’m really bad at this getting things done thing… sooo… I’m sorry, I know this has been in my asks for 100 years. But excuses… And i’m tired of this being in my drafts sooo… However, Hopefully it's decent enough.

Fandom: Onward

Pairings: Barley x Reader (mention of grandchildren once but nothing that indicates gender... I think...)

Warnings: Bad writing, Quick Mention of drunk idiots harassing reader, I don’t know a thing about Wrestling, Fluff, very bouncy thoughts... a tiny little bit of almost angst.

❀✦ Master List✦❀

You met Barley at a wrestling match when a few drunk idiots decided to hassle you. As they tend to do…

You ran into the first, seemingly safe person you saw. You looked at him with puppy eyes and were grateful he understood your silent plea.

Barley smiled warmly and put his arm around you. He pretended to be your boyfriend until the guys lost interest in you and left. He made some jokes to lighten the mood and struck up a casual conversation with you, as if you really did know each other. You found yourself amazed and feeling better, it seemed this elf boy radiated security and gentleness.

Then, with a simple thank you, you’d parted ways; only to run into each other again at the local diner after the match. It was there you had sat and talked well into the early hours of the morning.

You learned he was interested in many things you were, and you just felt… content around him. By the time you had to part, numbers were exchanged, and he’d texted you before noon that day.

You began hanging out shortly after that. You were nearly always at each other’s house, and quickly became close with his family. His mother adored you and his brother felt comfortable enough to joke around with you.

All in all you and Barley were quite close.

But not as close as your family's seemed to think you were… or maybe hope would be more appropriate…

The weekend had finally arrived and you made your way to Barley’s house, as planned, after work.

There was a big wrestling event in the evening and you and Barley had plans to hang out and watch it together. It wasn’t out of the ordinary for you to spend a lot of time at the Lightfoot house so no one batted an eye when you showed up a little early.

Ms. Lightfoot welcomed you and let you know that Barley had called saying he'd be a little late, and she was going out with friends. As she was leaving she turned to wink at you telling you, with a knowing look, to have fun.

You thanked her as you felt your cheeks flush with warmth and made your way to the familiar living room. You didn't mind waiting for Barley, in fact, you'd be willing to wait all night if it meant spending time with him. Not that you would tell him that...

Lost in your thoughts about how dumb and sappy that sounded even in your mind, and the implications therein, you hadn't noticed Barley's brother come in.

You had spent a fair amount of time with both brothers since you’d first met Barley. So by this time Ian was pretty comfortable around you, sometimes even coming to you for help or advice. Especially when it entailed something he might have been too embarrassed about to ask his mother or brother about.

Ian had decided to take a break from homework, and get a snack when he found you lost in thought on his couch. When he came back from the kitchen only to find you with the same dazed expression several minutes later he decided to tease you a little.

"Barley late for date night?" Ian asks, his tone even, leaning against the wall an apple in hand.

"Yea- wait no! Why would you say that?" You blink taken off guard by the sudden question.

Ian raises an eyebrow in a ‘really?’ expression.

“Shut up” you try and fail to keep the blush from your voice. "We're just… eh… hanging out!" You defend a little too enthusiastically.

“Interesting that’s the part you chose to respond to…” Ian chuckles, before heading back upstairs. If you weren't ready to admit your feelings, who was he to do it for you… besides, this was far more amusing.

It wasn't much longer until Barley arrived home, a little disheveled. The match wasn't due to start for another hour, maybe more depending on how things went, and yet it looked like the elf boy had rushed home.

Why?

The only thought that continued to creep into your mind was you… he rushed home to see you. The idea of It warmed your heart, and filled you with a longing. A longing for a potential life where Barley was coming home after work each day to see you.

He'd find you cooking… reading… working on some project… and kiss you.

You'd ask him about his day… and he yours.

You'd share a pleasant dinner and end the night cuddled on the couch…

You’d be happy…

Ian's words run on loop in your mind and you don’t notice the way Barley’s face lights up upon seeing you.

Did Barley think you were dating? That this was a date?

Did he want it to be?

Did you?

You hadn't noticed you were staring until Barley brought attention to it.

"What?" You jump.

"I asked why you were looking at me like that?" he gives you his charming little half smile as he repeats, what you assume was, his earlier question.

"Oh, um… nothing… no reason" you blush and desperately avoid looking at him.

Barley watches you for a moment, clearly not believing your answer, but gives in with a shrug.

"I'm just gonna go put my stuff down and get something to drink… you want something?" He asks.

"Okay, um… no thanks" you try to sound casual all the while you're incredibly aware of your quickening heartbeat.

Barley nods before leaving you, calling to you from the kitchen. He asks about your day. You give a non answer in response and ask him about his.

He goes on to tell you about some funny thing his boss said in response to an irate customer, and soon returns to the living room. He hands you your drink before flopping down next to you.

You scold him as you nearly spill. Not really realizing he brought you something even though you told him you didn’t need him to… not only that, but it was definitely your favorite… why would he… how…

"Sorry my love" he smirks, clearly not sorry.

You roll your eyes giving him a little shove in response to the nickname. He often called you sweet things. Things you previously attributed to his personality or teasing but now they had you wondering.

When he called you those things, sweetheart, darling, dear… was he actually hinting at what he really felt?

You look at him out of the corner of your eye and quickly squeak noticing he was watching you with an indescribable emotion.

"W-what?" You try to act casual.

"What's wrong with you?" He asks, blunt and to the point.

"What do you mean?" You try and play it off, as if your mind wasn’t playing that little game with the levers and ball… and see you can’t even remember what it’s called… and it’s your analogy…

PINBALL! Your brain was playing pinball… the dinging buzzing things the ball hits against being the sudden and many thoughts… which makes you the ball? Or was the ball the thoughts… bouncing around… there goes the analogy again…

"You're being all quiet and…” he indicates you vaguely, “did my mom say something to you? She's been teasing me about grandchildren lately, she didn't say something like that too you did she?"

Your eyes widen and you suspect Barley didn't mean to let that slip out by the blush now coloring his ears.

"No… but um… what-what do you tell her when she asks about that kind of stuff?" Yeah super subtle…

Barley scratches the back of his neck, “I tell her we haven't discussed that…"

Wait…

"Why would we… Um Barley?" You push away your insecurities, fear that you’d read the situation wrong, and decide to just jump in with both feet.

Or tip over the machine? Does it work now? The analogy?

He 'hmms'.

"Do you think we're dating?" You try to phrase it gently but cringe when you hear yourself. You don’t want to come across rude, like you’re making fun of him… but also don’t wanna let on how much you’re starting to suspect you want him to say yes…

Barley looks away from you, practically purple at this point.

"Uh… no of course not…" It sounded small, nervous but... hopeful?

"Do… do you want to?" you manage to force out, slightly proud of your mostly even tone.

Do you?

You’re still not sure at this point yourself, you’d only just realized the way you feel about the elf boy that was your best friend. Did you want to risk that? What happens if this was just a little puppy attraction, lust thing… and whatever relationship you begin quickly sizzles out?

Barley is looking at his hands as he nervously fiddles with the zipper of his vest. He bites his lip and tries to avoid your gaze.

Oh…

You soften, “It’s okay if you do… I mean… wanna… um…” Now you can’t find the words, which becomes more difficult when Barley looks up at you, hope shining in his eyes.

“What are you saying?” he prompts, heart pounding in his chest. He hopes you can’t hear it.

You shift, turning towards him slightly. “Well… if you wanted to maybe go on a date or something…”

“Yes?”

“I’d probably be okay with that… I mean… if you want to” you add the last part, now desperately hoping this wasn’t some awful joke.

Barley smiles, reaching forward to brush a piece of hair from your face. “Do you wanna go on a date with me?” He asks softly, apparently having gained some confidence back.

You nod, leaning into his touch before you realize you’re doing it.

“Tomorrow night?” he suggests.

Again, you nod, not trusting your voice.

Barley smiles, his attention turning back to the tv. The match was starting soon, the announcers already talking about what they expect to happen. He leans back, his arm resting behind you on the top of the couch. Not an uncommon thing for the elf boy. What was uncommon, however, was you relaxing against his side and how right it felt.

Without a word, perhaps because he wasn’t sure he could trust his voice either, Barley brings his arm down around you, holding you against him.

If you had the courage yourself to look up at him, you would have seen the flushing upon his cheeks. But either way this was comfortable and you weren’t in a hurry to end it any time soon.

A few hours later Barley's mom returns home. Maaaybe a little drunk which results in her cooing loudly when she finds you and Barley asleep and cuddling on the couch.

This, and her half stumbling up the stairs, manages to rouse you and Barley from your comfortable nap.

Barley yawns, and slowly gets to his feet.

"Come on, I'll drive you home" he offers another yawn soon follows.

"Don't worry, I can drive myself" you stretch, not really pleased with the idea of making the trip home yourself.

"You're too tired- not safe" Barley half murmurs.

"You're too tired" you retort.

"You should stay here… on the couch… or I can take the couch" he stumbles over his words.

You nod in agreement flopping back on the couch. When Barley doesn't leave you raise a brow in question.

"I was just thinking…" he shuffles from one foot to the other.

You watch him with patient eyes, now a little more alert. You'd let him say what he needed, when he needed not wanting to rush him.

"I mean… if I don't drive you home I can't kiss you goodbye…"

His ears were a dark maroon by now and you can't keep the smile from your eyes. His sweetness, his bashfulness, just how God damn cute he was. And most of all… how much you wanted to kiss his pink tinted face.

So you did.

You stood, quicker than he could react, grabbed his face on either side, and brought his lips to yours. After a moment of shock Barley’s arms come around you, keeping you too him.

You can't say for sure if the head rush you felt was from the kiss or standing too suddenly, but you chose to think it was the kiss as you give him several more little pecks before eventually breaking apart with a yawn.

"Better?" You ask, your head falling forward to lean against his shoulder.

Barley nods before pulling back, calling a good night to you, and hurrying to his room.

You chuckle softly before flopping once again on the couch… there'd be time tomorrow to deal with all this… but for now… sleep was calling and the old couch was far too inviting…

*And that’s all folks*

#Barley Lightfoot #Barley X Reader #Barley Lightfoot x reader #Onward #Once again writing about something I don't know about #Request #Fluff

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yuta-nakamots · 3 years

Text

perfect - z.cl

Pairing - Chenle x Fem!Reader

Genre - fluff, angst, university!au, friends to lovers!au

Warnings - alcohol consumption, mention of drunkeness, lots of arguments, heavy making out, breakups, contains an aged up chenle (26-ish) towards the end

Summary - He’s definitely not your knight in shining armor, he may not be the one you bring home to mother, but he’ll be the one to give you flowers. Chenle is not the right one for you, but he is for right now.

Word Count - 5.2k

A/N - Bolded phrases are song lyrics taken from One Direction’s song ‘Perfect’ and inspired from the lyrics along with all the vlives where Chenle and the members have started yelling out the lyrics.This was supposed to come out back in January but school held it up and now Ana is gone hhhhh. I know she’s still on Tumblr but under a new url so if anyone wants to send this to her, to let her know that I did finish it, that would be nice.

Taglist - @astroboy-lele @in-my-neofeelings || fill out this form if you’d like to join my general taglist ^^

Written for the Sometimes Letting Go… Collab originally hosted by @sunryu who unfortunately deactivated.

When I first saw you from across the room, I could tell you were curious

The mutual attraction between you and Chenle was undeniable. Ever since the two of you first met as freshmen in an econ class, you knew he was your twin flame and he was yours. That initial meeting was almost comical, the way the professor said to pair up and talk to someone next to them for a bit and it seemed like everyone had turned away from you except for the boy sitting next to you.

It seems you both had the same realization as your heads turned and eyes met. “Well I guess you’re my friend for today,” he began, “hi, my name is Chenle. Pleased to make your acquaintance.”

“Y/n,” you told him, “the pleasure is all mine.”

“So, why are you in this class?” He asked, tapping his pen on his leather-bound planner.

You hesitated for a second as you thought about how much to tell him. “I’m majoring in business and this was just one of the mandatory classes in my plan.”

“Hm, same here,” Chenle shared, seeming the slightest bit amused at your similarity, “would you also happen to be in calculus this semester?”

“Section 3 at 10:30?” You counter.

Chenle broke into a smile, “that’s the one.”

“How about freshman seminar?” You asked.

“1:15 in the world language building?” Chenle offered, copying your answer from before.

“Wow,” your eyebrows were raised in actual disbelief, “did you steal my schedule or something?”

“No, but I do believe in fate,” the boy next to you confessed, “would you like to get lunch sometime before freshmen seminar?”

You nodded, “I’d like that,” you stopped mid-sentence when you remembered that you told your friends you’d eat with them, “I am gonna be eating with my friends though so I could introduce you to them if you’d like.”

“Want to bet that we have the same friends too?”

“No way, that would be too coincidental.”

And coincidental it was. Somehow your friends knew some of Chenle’s friends whether it be from high school activities, childhood friends, or even having just met in their own classes. Your small group of five had immediately doubled in size.

Of course, with such a large group of friends, there was much fun to be had and many memories to be made. During midterms is when you were thankful you were majoring in business and not something like biology or chemistry. You could still go out and have fun on weekends with Chenle and the majority of your friends, meanwhile a few poor souls had to stay back to study their ‘reaction mechanisms’ or whatever the heck those things were called.

You quickly found that you weren’t one for parties though you loved to hang out with your friends and have small little parties of your own in the dorms. Every single time, as you all got progressively drunker and started to clock out for the night, it was always you and Chenle left being the two most sober with no other choice but to take care of your friends over hushed conversations.

“How much vodka did Hannah even drink?” Chenle asked while you both worked on cleaning up the mess of solo cups and napkins surrounding your friend who had, unfortunately, drank over half of the bottle. You picked it up, waving it at Chenle to show him. “She’s gonna have a nasty hangover…or at least wake up super dehydrated.”

As you worked on laying a blanket across her, passed out on the floor, Chenle had managed to stuff all the napkins inside the cups he had collected and was busy aiming at the trash can across the room. Right as he was about to shoot, “miss!” you called out. The little stack of cups hit the rim of the plastic trash bin and fell to the floor. Chenle turned to you, sticking out his tongue and imitating the way you caused him to mess up before going to properly dispose of the rubbish.

Instead of simply placing it in the waste, he once again returned to where he stood before, with one eye shut, aiming for the bin. You let out a scoff, ready to disturb him once more. He shot you a glance, knowing what you were planning from the way you just stood watching him. But regardless, he tried again. “Airball” you sang as he released the short stack of cups, sending them flying to the foot of the bin.

Chenle let out a growl, childishly stomping his way over to you while you tried to quietly escape from his grasps through the mess of food and other miscellaneous items on the floor. From the hushed giggles and name-calling from the two of you as you both stumbled around the room, to the whispered late-night thoughts and affirmations spoken from your positions on the floor with your heads resting on the edge of a bed, you barely even noticed how fast time was passing.

“Are you going home for the holidays?” You asked him.

He shook his head, “it’s my first time getting to live away from my parents and whenever I do go back, they’ll probably be expecting me to bring some girl with me.”

You turned to look at him, “why would they expect that?”

“They’re both getting old and want to retire soon,” Chenle started, “so the faster I get married and take over the company, the faster they’ll get to live out the rest of their lives,” he explained.

“Well that’s not very nice of them,” you commented, “what kind of parents would place such high responsibility on their child like that?”

“Mine I guess,” Chenle sighed.

After a moment of silence, you sat up, unsure what to make of the next words to come out of your mouth. “If you want, I could go with you.” Chenle looked at you with his eyebrows furrowed. “Like, I could be your fake girlfriend or something so that they don’t bother you so much about finding one.”

“That’s…an idea,” he started, biting on the corner of his lip as he played out possible scenarios in his head. “I think that would only make it worse though since we’d both have to make up stories and tell the same information.”

“True. But we could at least make it look believable, don’t you think?” You reached over to pet Chenle’s head the same way you’ve seen him do to his friends. “Oh, Chenle, you’re so cute,” you cooed, “I can’t wait to marry you and be with you for the rest of our lives.”

He grabbed your wrist and put it in your lap, not very keen on the show of affection. “Yeah, I think we’d look like a pretty convincing couple.”

“Do we look good together though?” You pondered. “If we were to show up to an event or something, would we make people stop and stare at us?”

“Anyone can do that if they wear something weird or do something out of the ordinary-“

“Okay but that’s not what I’m asking,” you interrupted, “I’m asking, would we look good together as a couple?”

Chenle shrugged apprehensively, “sure.” Your eyes bore into him as if forcing a more legit answer out of him. “Yes, I think we would look good as a couple.”

It was as if you and Chenle were made for each other. Whatever one did, the other was never too far behind. It was absolutely no surprise to your friends when you told them Chenle had asked you out and you became official. While your college careers continued and friends came and went, Chenle was always with you. He was your solid island in the middle of a tumultuous sea, your oasis in a dried desert. You didn’t need anyone else around to have fun, just him, just the two of you.

But if you like causing trouble up in hotel rooms and if you like having secret little rendezvous

Being with Chenle was as wild as things could get. It meant impulsive plans and bad decisions. Weekend nights normally consisted of one of you driving with no destination in mind until someone got hungry. Even at that point, the night didn’t end.

Sometimes the two of you would stay out past midnight, not wanting to leave each other’s company just yet. The feeling of the wind whipping past you as Chenle drove or the thrill of gassing it down the freeway was almost dreamlike. One would think that at this point, you’d return home, but for you, your home was wherever Chenle was. If it meant staying in a small hotel room for the night drinking cheap wine out of paper cups then so be it, that was home.

“Baby, you already drank almost half of the bottle, leave some for me,” Chenle teased, his eyes glimmering under the low lighting. The brightness of the small lamp on the desk failed to reach where he was sitting, the cozy armchair too far in the corner for it to be illuminated.

“Come here and get some then,” you suggested, lazily winking at him before downing another shot-sized gulp and enjoying the burn from the liquid running down your throat. The bed you were sitting on wasn’t all that soft but you had already warmed up a little spot of it and gotten too comfortable to move.

Chenle raised an eyebrow at you, a smirk tugging at his lips. “I don’t think you want me to do that.”

“Why not?” Your expression mirroring his.

“You wanna find out?

“Maybe I do.”

He let out a scoff and within a second he was on the bed, climbing up and settling over you. His warm breath fanned your neck, the scent of alcohol filling your senses. “Are you sure about that?”

“Fuck around and find out, handsome,” you taunted.

You had barely even finished your sentence before Chenle’s lips were on yours, his usual soft and pillowy lips became hot and heavy against yours under the guide of the fifteen-dollar wine. You were sure that you were definitely getting tipsy but Chenle’s love and passion were even more overwhelming. It was moments like this when you felt that you were drunk off of his love and it was absolutely intoxicating in the best way.

If you like to do the things you know that we shouldn’t do, then baby I’m perfect

It was drunk weekends like this that led to a rocky start of the following week. It’s not that you and Chenle were bad students, it’s just that when you become totally infatuated with the person you love, you start to devote yourself to them instead of what actually needs to get done.

As sophomores in college, one would think that you’d have a little more self-control but with Chenle, you just couldn’t help it. He was worse than any drug you could ever take, to the point where your friends would have to intervene and keep you in your rooms until a substantial amount of work was done.

You called them annoying but really you should’ve been thankful to them for caring so much about you back then, and you are thankful, looking back on it. They always told you ‘distance makes the heart grow fonder’ and you wish you had listened to them. Maybe if you did, you wouldn’t have lost a relationship that you thought was practically flawless.

Perfect for you

In junior year, that is when your beautiful illusion finally began crumbling down. Your workloads grew heavier and your hours of sleep decreased. Chenle would often leave you on read, having opened your message in the middle of studying then forgotten to reply to it. Even when you childishly got upset at him for that, he’d always give you the same apology or buy you something cute as if money could shut you up.

With little to no distance between the two of you, it was easy for boundaries to be crossed and for problems to go unaddressed. You can feel like you know someone so well, that they’ll always understand what you mean and they can read your words like a book, but it didn’t seem that way anymore with Chenle.

He’d make fun of the way you always made him say ‘I love you’ at least once a day or some of your other pet peeves, including the way you had a Hello Kitty mouse pad that was ‘too childish for a college student to be using.’ It may have been out of love but it sure didn’t seem that way.

I might never be the hands you put your heart in or the arms that hold you any time you want them

Soon, the little pricks in your relationship spread past closed doors and into your schoolwork. Sharing a major and classes with your significant other was not exactly ideal, especially when they had different values and beliefs from you and had to argue for their reasoning.

“That just isn’t sustainable in the long run though,” you commented as you read through Chenle’s senior research report while seated opposite of him inside a library study room.

He ran a hand through his hair, leaning back into his seat, about to repeat himself for the fourth time. “It’s not about sustainability, it’s about the profit margin that’s being made. What don’t you get?”

“It’s not good for the environment, it’s not good for the people working in the factories,” you point out, “I don’t get how you can subject these things onto people.”

“Y/n, we’re business majors,” he stated plainly, “we study money, the economy, sales, company relationships, we’re not here to be environmentalists. Things don’t have to last very long, so much as they make a profit.”

“But we should think about the impact of our future businesses and their longevity in the world-”

“You should think about passing this class and stop being so prissy and uptight about saving trees or whatever the fuck you’re going on about.”

You were absolutely shocked at the words that had just come out of his mouth. This wasn’t the first time he had seemingly degraded you in this manner, but when it came to school and your own work, you were deeply offended at what he had said, especially since both of you had spent many hours on your respective projects.

“Chenle,” you began softly, “tell me you didn’t mean that.”

He refused to meet your gaze, “If I told you that then I would be a liar.”

“Look, you can’t just spew whatever bullshit you want and just expect that people won’t get hurt,” you criticized, only to be cut off once more.

“Then maybe you should learn to not take everything so seriously,” he snapped back.

“I...I think we need a break.”

“Agreed.”

“No, from each other.” Chenle’s head whipped up to look at you, his eyes went wide when he realized what you were insinuating.

“Baby no, you know it’s not like that,” he started, but it was already too late. You blocked his voice out of your head as you packed your belongings, just wanting to get out of this room, wanting to get away from him.

This wasn’t the first time you had fought with him in this way but it felt like you had finally lost all your patience. You were tired of always being told you were wrong and having your thoughts and ideas invalidated. As you stormed away from the library, you realized that maybe you needed to let go of things that no longer brought you joy.

Sometimes letting go...is a new start

After that incident, you did indeed have a fresh start. You slowly removed Chenle from your life and just in time for graduation. Whenever he tried to approach you on campus, you always turned the other way even if it meant being late to class. Luckily, you didn’t have many shared classes with him anymore and you were all the more grateful for it right now.

You’d come back to your campus apartment with the occasional flower or sticky note left on your doorstep asking you to give him another chance but you simply didn’t have enough time or energy to care anymore. Commencement was approaching and you still had yet to hear back from any of the companies you had applied to for internships.

But that don’t mean that we can’t live here in the moment

One of your friends had mentioned that Chenle had already received news that he was accepted into his family’s business, a large company in China, and you wished you could’ve been there when he had read the email. You could practically hear his yell of delight, his laugh when he’d turn to hug you, even if it was practically guaranteed that he’d get in, you missed it all so much but there was no turning back now.

It wasn’t until after commencement did you receive your own letter of acceptance from one of the largest foreign trade companies in the area after you saw Chenle for the last time. “Zhong Chenle, Bachelor of Arts in business management.” You remembered the immense pride and pain you felt in your chest, watching him walk across the stage to claim his diploma as you sat clothed in the same cap and gown only a few rows away. You wished you could share your emotions with him, but you had to remind yourself that he was no longer yours, he was no longer the man you first fell in love with.

‘Cause I can be the one you love from time to time

Four years have passed since that moment at commencement. In those four years, you’ve climbed your way up in the company, taking a hold of a directing position in project development and management. With all your success though, there was always one failure that kept floating through your mind. The number of sleepless nights and wandering moments you’ve spent thinking about all the ‘what ifs’ and the changes you should’ve made in your relationship have all decreased with time, but sometimes it all comes crashing back. You miss the memories you made with him and you miss being so young and naive.

Sometimes you managed to hear a thing or two about the company he worked for but you never paid much attention to it, always falling back into a spiral of guilt and calling yourself the sole reason why your relationship fell apart. Chenle would even pop into your mind at the weirdest times when you’d be thinking of anything but him.

Like the other day as you were staring out the window of your office, watching people and cars pass by, your memory of Chenle speeding down the empty highway suddenly resurfaced. The adrenaline you felt from the buildings and signs whizzing by, the slight buzz of alcohol you felt in your system, the cool air coming in from Chenle’s window, the warmth of his hand in yours. You couldn’t help but smile at it fondly yet it turned sour when you thought of the last time he ever drove you somewhere. You had argued with him about something dumb, you couldn’t even remember it at this point, and you even slammed the door before storming off to who knows where.

Or some months ago, you were interviewing possible new hires for the company and met someone from Puerto Rico. Once you finished the interview with them, you sat at the wooden desk while remembering the way you teased Chenle because he didn’t know how to pronounce Puerto Rico. You thought it was cute and even told him that, but it ended up in another fight because you may have spent a little too long dwelling on the topic.

But oftentimes when you find yourself thinking about him, you’d wonder how he’s doing. Is he happy where he is right now? What kinds of things is he doing for his job? Has he found a new girlfriend? What if he dated many other people after me? What if he’s married? Would he have children by now? Or most importantly, ‘does he still love me?’

And if you like midnight driving with the windows down, and if you like going places we can’t even pronounce

Regardless, you’d shake off all these thoughts and continue about your day, completing the tasks assigned to you. The majority of your time was spent conducting interviews and deliberating with the directors about who to hire for what position. It was quite fun, really. You got to meet all of the new hires before they came into the company and you felt empowered by the fact that you would be indirectly responsible for the future of the company in this sort of way.

On one particular day, everything felt like it was going just a little too well. Your hair was done just the right way, traffic was light, your coworkers seemed to all be in a good mood, but most importantly, there were no fat folders sitting on your desk, waiting for you to go through. Just a single sheet of paper with the list of the new hires coming in for their briefings along with the notes you were required to go over.

You didn’t bother checking it, seeing as how you had exactly two minutes left before the scheduled meet time, which was exactly the amount of time you needed to head downstairs to the conference room. You really should have checked the list though. It would have prepared you for the shock of seeing a certain someone sitting at the table in a suit that looked all too good on him.

“Zhong Chenle?” You audibly gasped, pausing in your tracks the moment you entered the conference room.

His eyes were already on you as if he knew you’d be the person to walk through that doorway at that exact moment. “That would be me.”

The other new hires looked around at each other sharing all types of glances. Worried, suspicious, surprised, questioning, nothing really all that positive. “Sorry, he’s just an old friend that I was surprised to see,” you quickly explained, trying to pull yourself back together.

Throughout your whole presentation, it was like all the attention in the world was directed at you. Never had you felt this nervous before doing something that was supposed to be so familiar. Every time your eyes glanced over in Chenle’s direction, his gaze managed to catch yours as if he was trying to speak to you without any words.

By the time you adjourned the meeting and sent the new hires off to their respective departments, it felt like you had run a marathon. Your palms were clammy, your legs shaky, your mind racing, and your heart was pounding.

Chenle was the only one left in the conference hall while you pushed in all the chairs and turned off the lights. “Looks like these years have done you well.” He commented, finally able to take in the sight of you now that there was no one else around.

“I could say the same for you.” His shoulder had gotten broader and any childlike features had left his face. He truly looked like he had grown into a man. The dark gray suit he was wearing fit the lines of his body so well, it made you think he could’ve been a model instead of simply becoming an office worker. “So how have you been?”

He did a classic Chenle shrug, “nothing much really. I started off being just a marketing employee, did some work, and got myself to be chief marketing officer. It seems you’ve gotten much further than I have, though. Project development and management?”

“Oh, it’s not anything huge. I just help with planning things out and doing all the paperwork for its execution. I only do interviews and help with hiring when we’re in season, which would be why I’m here right now,” you explained, motioning for him to follow you out of the room. “Your new supervisor is probably wondering where you are. I sent the rest of the newbies a few minutes ago already. I’ll just tell him that you had a few questions about our operations.”

“Wow, cheating the system? That’s not the way I remember you,” Chenle said with mock disapproval. You led him to the elevators, pleasantly surprised to find one still on your floor after you hit the ‘up’ button. Your eyes met with his while you gestured for him to go in. “Ladies first,” he had a cat-like grin on his face as you rolled your eyes and stepped into the elevator.

“So why did you decide to leave your company? Weren’t you going to take it over someday?” You ask over the squeaking of the doors closing.

Chenle leaned against the cold metal wall of the elevator, “I still plan to but I felt like they were just kind of babying me or treating me differently because they knew of my background,” he explained. You could only nod to acknowledge the fact that you were listening. “I told my parents that I wanted to get experience outside of the company and they didn’t really understand at first until I showed them my point of view and how it’s a little worrisome to perhaps, learn how to cook when you always have chefs around you giving you instructions down to the tiniest things.”

The elevator came to a stop and the heavy doors opened onto the floor Chenle would be working on. “But why this company? We’re not even closely related to yours?” You led him down the hallway in the direction of his supervisor's office.

“My parents were the ones who recommended it, actually. It would be a little risky to go to a neighboring one in the case of it being viewed as a betrayal or like some kind of inside mission so they said I should just come back here since I’d probably have a high chance of acceptance-“ you put a hand up to stop him from talking, seeing how many of the other employees had started to look at him due to his volume.

“Chenle, must I remind you that this is an office?” You gritted out, embarrassed in front of your colleagues.

He shook his head before turning to the mass of them, bowing politely then continuing in the same direction as before. Once both of you reached the head office at the end of the hallway, Chenle spoke up once more. “By any chance, are you free tonight?”

“That depends,” you began, “what are you hinting at?”

“Just seeing if you’d like to go out to dinner so we can properly catch up, I guess,” he proposed bashfully.

You hummed in thought, “mmm, put in a good word for me with your supervisor and you’ve got a deal.”

“Deal,” he agreed.

“Meet me in the lobby at 5:30, don’t be late,” you told him before knocking on the wooden door in front of you and allowing Chenle in.

If you like to do whatever you’ve been dreaming about, then baby you’re perfect

You thought Chenle’s wine phase in college would be just that, a phase, but it really wasn’t. He had ordered an expensive bottle of merlot even with all your insistence that you wouldn’t be drinking and even made him promise that he’d be sober enough to drive himself back to wherever his accommodations were.

He made a face of fake dismissal before picking up your last conversation. “So anyway, as I was saying earlier, my parents suggested that I come back here, especially since I got my degree from the university so I’m bound to get in.”

You were about to open your mouth to say something like “getting in is not a guarantee” especially coming from your experience in doing interviews and having to decide which applicants to turn down, but you decided against it.

“Initially, I was a little against it since I didn’t want to come back to somewhere I’ve already stayed at for some time,” he confessed, “but after I did some research on the company and found out that you’re one of the associates, I was a little more open to the idea.”

There was a break of silence while you started to link your thoughts together. “So you came here because you found out that I work here?”

“Yes, but also no,” Chenle stated, blurting the second part out rather quickly when he saw the shift in your expression. “It is true that I wanted to see you and how you were doing but it’s not just that. I figured that if you worked here and had such a high position, it must be a good place to work.”

“But what I’m hearing is…you came here because of me,” you state bluntly though your heart couldn’t help but let out a cheer of delight.

Chenle redirected his gaze at the neighboring tables. “You could say that, sure.”

“Chenle, what do you want out of this? What do you want out of me specifically?” You contended. His eyes continued to flit around the lowly lit space, not daring to meet yours unlike earlier in the conference hall. “What? Did you come back just expecting me to run into your arms? Did you think we would just pick up where we left off?”

Now he looked down at the white tablecloth, as if in shame. “Would it be wrong of me to ask for a second chance?”

You too joined him in staring at the table, wishing that he had answered ‘no’ to your previous questions. “It wouldn’t exactly be wrong, but it’s not right either. I’d be willing to give you a second chance if we agree to not call it that, but rather a promise.”

He finally looked up at you again, his dark pupils catching the dim golden lights above him. “A promise?”

You nodded. “We’re older now, we’re fully grown adults with jobs to do and taxes to pay. We’re no longer the same carefree college students we used to be.”

“Well yeah, obviously-“

“No, listen,” you interject, cutting him off, “we can’t just recklessly play with each other’s minds and feelings like we used to. No more games and no more ‘next times.’ If we try again, I want this to be a promise that we’ll both do better because we can and we want to.”

“If it’s a promise that you want then,” Chenle held out his hand with his pinky finger extended, “it’s a promise I’m willing to make.”

You linked your pinky with his before bringing your thumbs together and sealing the promise. Matching smiles appeared across both of your faces as you stepped into a new chapter of life with Chenle by your side once more.

Sometimes letting go is…perfect. So let’s start right now

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