#the reply kinda came out of me in a way that she reacts to ash's stuff first and then answers the questions about her own

[suchalonelysunflower]

Tell Me a Lie (c.h)

Pairing: Calum Hood X Fem!Reader

Requested: Kinda yes!

Summary: Part 2 of Tell Me What You’re Thinking. The aftermath of the dreadful night that left two broken hearts along the way. Could they ever fic it?

Warnings: ANGST. Language, mentions of drugs and alcohol, mentions of cheating. Some grammar mistakes (I’m sorry, English is not my first language)

Word count: 5.8k

Author’s note: Holy! I never thought I would end up writing a part 2 of this, but I’m so glad so many of you requested it and supported it 🥺❤️ thank you so so so much. As you know: Reblogs, Coments, Feedbacks and likes are more than welcomed and encouraged! I’d love to hear from you guys and I can’t wait to see how you react to this and the question: if you were on the readers shoes, would you forgive him? Thank you so much, hope you like it and Happy Reading ✨🦋🌻

Part 1

My materialist // wanna be part of my tag list?

Calum stopped laughing at Mitchy a long time ago, but he didn’t seem to notice. Frankly, he was regretting his decision on inviting the singer today, knowing that he was completely high even before he got to the house.

He secretly envided Ashton who got away a few moments earlier, he couldn’t blame him at all as he wondered what he was doing in his kitchen and if he should go to make him company and leave Mitchy alone in his own world, not that he would notice either way.

But just before he decided to get up and leave, just like he could read his thoughts, Ashton walked into the living room. A feeling of relief washed over Calum as he saw his best friend approach, hoping that he could spare him some actual good conversations, but the drummer seemed too busy as he grabbed his phone from the coffee table and stepped outside to make a call, entering the house a few moments later to grab his jacket and his keys.

“Where are you going Ash?” Calum asked, almost begging him to stay and not leave him alone with Mitchy.

But Ashton didn’t spare a glance at him as he muttered through gritted teeth “I’m leaving”

Calum was confused by his friend's attitude, not knowing what caused his strange behavior. But before he could ask him, Mitchy beat him to it “Aw man! We are just going to the club to meet some hot chicks! You should come with us!”

And that was the last straw Ashton needed to unleash the rage behind his eyes, the same rage he was holding all night as he watched you cry in the kitchen a few minutes ago.

Calum watched as Ashton’s face completely disfigured itself as he started yelling.

“You are both such assholes!” He said, looking between Mitchy and Calum, making the latter one jump in his seat at the sudden outburst “Do you even realize what you did? You just made the most amazing person on this planet feel like shit cause you can’t keep your comments to yourselves!” He looked at Mitchy “You don’t know a single fucking shit about her to talk about her like that. If you knew her you’d know that Y/N is amazing the way she is and you should be ashamed of yourself for disrespecting such an incredible woman like that!” Then he looked at Calum, who looked like he’d just seen a ghost “And you… I’m so disappointed in you. I can’t even look at you right now. You were really going to cheat on her? Are you really that stupid to lose her like that?! To lose her at all?! Do you know how incredibly lucky and incredibly stupid you are?! I am disgusted with both of you. And Y/N doesn’t deserve to cry for such man babies who’d talk about her behind her back”

At the sound of your name, Calum’s world fell at his feet. Did you know what Mitchy and him talked about? That wasn’t what he meant!

“Y-Y/N-“ He said, gripping the edge of his seat. Ashton just looked at him with pity “She heard it all”

That was almost three months ago. Three months since he watched the love of his life walk away from him and leave him alone. Three months since Ashton had said a full sentence to him that wasn’t filled with utter disappointment. Three months since he cut ties with Mitchy, claiming that he never wanted to see the singer again and that he should not try to contact him or any of the boys again. Three months where every night he comes to an empty house, hoping that it was all a bad dream and that he’ll find you in the kitchen studying for your next test or waiting for him with a glass of wine just to talk and share a moment with him. But now you won’t even spare him a glance.

He knew he couldn’t blame you. That is the last thing on his mind when he thinks about that night and all that led to it. More often than not he would find himself turning and tossing on his bed, unable to sleep. The memory of your tear filled eyes and the echoing sound of your voice take over him as he relives that moment over and over again, still unable to find anything in him to make you stay.

If he could change the past, out of all the wrongs he’d done, he will make it right for you. He would tell Mitchy to go fuck himself, kick him out for disrespecting you that way. He would have gone to find you in his room, make you pack your stuff and take you away to that mini holiday you never got live. He would cover you in kisses and beg you not to leave him because he will miss you too much. He would tell you that he loves you more than anything in his life and that he is sorry he couldn’t love you more.

But time cannot be reversed and some hurts might never be healed.

And Calum misses you, Duke misses you. But he knows you are not coming back anytime soon, Ashton made sure to tell him that in one of the last conversations he had with him.

“I don’t want to talk about it,” The drummer said a few days later when he got sick of Calum constantly questioning him about you “And not only because she made me swear not to tell you anything. But because if I start talking about her and how you broke her, I cannot promise you it will end well for you. All I can tell you is that she is safe.”

At least he knew you were with Ashton, you always confided in him as your best friend. But that also meant that Ashton had to take sides and he made it very clear from that night that he was on yours. Luke and Michael stood neutral to the fight, knowing it would only hurt the band even more, but they told Calum that this time he was on his own if he ever tried to take you back.

And, then again, Calum cannot blame them. He knew that if they were in his shoes he’d do the same thing. What he did was horrible, the coward’s way to face things. And there was nothing he regretted more.

He tried to occupy his time with whatever came to mind, he could not stand being alone with his thoughts cause the only thing he did was think of you. So today he decided to go on a run.

It was a horrible thing that it didn’t work, cause after minutes or hours of running through the streets without a clear path, he ended up in front of Ashton’s place.

He knew he shouldn’t do it, that the right thing to do was to give you space. But when he saw the lightest shadow of your figure grace the window, he knew he had to see you, even just one more time. So he knocked on the door and prayed to every god he’d ever known that you would answer.

But nothing could prepare him for when you did.

You don’t remember much about the rest of that night. The night where you jumped in Ashton’s car and fled the house you used to know as home.

You remember Ashton having to carry you to his guest room, or at least you assumed he did it cause you don’t remember walking up the stairs. You remember crying, hanging onto his shirt and asking the universe why? Why didn’t he do anything? Why didn’t he fight for you? Why did you have to love him still?

You begged for Ashton to stay with you, the thought of being alone that night terrified you. But he replied that he was planning on doing it anyway “I’m not leaving you, Y/N” He said, and those were the most comforting words you heard all day until you fell asleep from crying too much.

The next morning you woke up alone and you didn’t know where you were. The sheets were not yours, the wallpaper and the pictures were unknown to you and the smell was unfamiliar. Unconsciously you reached your hand to the other side, finding it empty but still kind of warm and you wondered if Calum had taken Duke out for a walk like he used to do every Saturday morning that he was home.

Only when Ashton came into the room carrying a tray with a warm breakfast on it did you remember the incidents of the night before. Your eyes filled with tears again as you watch him lay the tray in front of you.

“I know you don’t want to hear this,” He said, his voice was comforting at best, but you couldn’t help but hear the pity that came with it “But you need to eat. I know you haven’t been eating anything since at least yesterday's noon”

You looked at the food and shook your head “C’mon babe, for me?” He asked, softly rubbing your shoulder “I know I’m not the best cook but at least I know this is edible” He joked, making you chuckle through the tears that were already spilling from your eyes.

“I don’t know what to do” You honestly tell him.

“Do you want to talk to him?”

“No.” You replied quickly “I don’t want to see him and I don’t want him to see me” Ashton looked at you and it almost seemed like he wanted to say something, but eventually just nodded at your wish “I just- I need to get my other stuff out of the house and-”

“I can let you know when he’s out. That way you won’t have to face him if you don’t want to”

“Thank you, Ash.” You smiled at him gratefully, placing your hand on top of his “I’m going to start looking for a new place soon and-”

“None of that” Ashton said shaking his head “You can stay here! I don’t have a roommate and, I’m sorry, but I don’t like the idea of you being alone” You opened your mouth to say something, but he continued “I promise I will talk to Calum that he is not welcomed here without my, and now your, permission. I won’t let him hurt you again”

That was three months ago and you can honestly say that you are doing just fine by now.

Yes, the first few weeks you spent them in your bed, crying and heartbroken at the thought of losing the love of your life. Calum was everything to you and it seemed like in the blink of an eye that “everything” crumbled right in front of you as you realized just how little you meant to him.

Many nights you tried to fool yourself into thinking that it was all a big misunderstandment. That you somehow misheard every word and it was just your brain creating scenarios that would never become a reality. However, the faintest echo of Calum’s laughter at Mitchy’s comments, his agreeability to go on with his plan, the things he said and the things he didn’t say… they were all still tattooed inside your head.

“A good fuck” That’s what he said. That was the only positive thing he had to say while his friend mocked you and humiliated you like it was nothing. Like if he hadn’t thought those things before.

You decided you wanted nothing to do with him. You blocked his number and deleted his number. You also begged Ashton not to cause anymore scenes between the two of them, knowing how badly it could affect the band if they let their feelings come between them.

A month went by, then two and now three, and not a day goes by that you don’t think of Calum and how he’s doing, if he has a new girl or if he ever got to meet that Vanessa girl. You knew it wasn’t healthy, but you spent so many years loving him that it was impossible to fall out of love for him, even after he hurt you so badly.

Ashton helped a lot. He always tried to cheer you up, even inspiring you to try yoga and meditation to help you clear your thoughts and bring new energy into your life. And, even if you hate to admit it, it worked! In these three months you found out things about yourself that you never thought of before. You realized that all your dreams were for you and Calum, yet none of those dreams were only for you.

Your career, your job… those were your dreams. But soon enough those dreams became shared once you met Calum, pushing them aside from time to time to accompany him on tour, or to help him write a song or two when he got stuck, or even just because he asked you to. You were more than happy to do so, but you did that for him, for the both of you, not for you.

With that in mind, you began to search for yourself, for your needs and wants. You aren’t quite there yet, but it helps you keep your mind busy from the heartache. And, slowly and steady, you began to feel more like yourself again.

Just like right now, you asked Ashton to grab some things from the store once he’s back from the studio, telling him you were going to try to cook some pastries that your mom used to make when you were little. He said he’d be home soon and that’s why you weren’t surprised to hear the knock on your door, knowing that he usually forgets his keys in every set of skinny jeans he owns.

You laughed at yourself, thinking of teasing him about having a set of keys for every pair of jeans he owned. Only this time it wasn’t Ashton who was standing at the other side of the door.

Calum swore his heart could not break anymore until he saw how your smile disappeared from your face when you realized it was him. You were looking good, better than him at least. Your hair was a little bit longer and you still wore socks inside the house. But your eyes… your eyes were different. They didn’t shine anymore with that gleam that got him completely hooked to your gaze, the gleam that was reserved just for him. Now, he could only see himself reflected in those y/e/c eyes and he could see the disappointment behind them.

The first thing that comes into your mind was his beard, he never used to have a beard before, he always kept his face clean and neat but now his scruff was decorating his jawline and you were not sure you liked it. His clothes were a mess too, you realized he came running as you took in the beads of sweat that covered his forehead, but his clothes seemed old and they were not matching. He never really cared about the clothes he’d wear when he was in a rush.

You took your time to meet his eyes, knowing that once you stared at those brown orbs you might just break down. But once you did, it was like you were able to stand taller, to stand up to him as the only feeling you had running through your head was doubt.

“What are you doing here?” You asked. Not a hello, not a welcome, not even his name. Calum knew he deserved none of that.

He flinched at the sound of your voice. The voice that once was sweet as honey, was now cold and hard like steel, just like it sounded before you left.

“Y/N I-” He said, pleading with a string of his voice, trying his hardest not to cry in front of you. Suddenly now he realized just how hard it was to see you again “Can we talk?”

You hesitated and Calum noticed that. He saw how you gripped the doorknob, and he hoped that you let him in despite knowing that he deserves to have that door close on his face.

“Please?”

You knew you couldn't resist him, not only that but something inside you begged for you to let him in, to hear him out. However, you could not help but feel a little bit scared. You weren’t ready to see him, but you have to.

With a sigh, you opened the door. You watched how his shoulders relaxed as he let go of his breath. He was as scared as you were.

Calum walked inside the living room. He hasn’t been here in months, but he can recognize your touch. You were everywhere in this room and he assumed that would be the case for all of the house as well. He recognized a few decorations that once adorned your shared home, you took them all with you when you left. Leaving him with not a single trace of you to hold on to.

You closed the door and followed after him. You found Calum standing in the middle of the room, checking the pictures you brought from his house, you knew he was trying to, even hoping to find himself in one of them, but all of those pictures were tucked away now, leaving all those memories behind.

Calum turned to you once you entered the room. He looked defeated, broken even, and your heart could not stand it. Even after all he put you through, you still care for him and you are sure you will always care for him, even when you don’t want to.

“I cannot start this conversation without saying how sorry I am” He said, hands in his pockets and eyes locked in yours. You could already feel the tears start to come but you held them back.

“Calum-” Calum, not Cal or babe or love. Just Calum.

He closed his eyes for a moment, taking in how the sound of his name now held no comfort for him “I need to say it, Y/N. Please” You nodded and he continued “I am an idiot. A stupid son of a bitch who lost everything before he ever realized what he’d done and I’m sorry, Y/N. I am so terribly sorry and I hope one day you could believe that” You wanted to say that you did, but he beat you to it “And I know that a simple sorry doesn’t fix things… fuck I don’t even know how to begin. I thought I was ready to see you and tell you just how fucked up I am without you but-” He started to choke up, his feelings were overwhelming even for you “When I look at you all I want to do is hold you close and it kills me that I can’t do that”

“I have no excuse, Y/N. No excuse that doesn’t make me sound like an asshole for treating you the way I did. Cause that’s exactly what I am, I am an asshole who lost the best thing that has ever happened to him just because he was too much of a coward to say anything.

But you have to know - you must know that I don’t think of you that way. I never did nor I ever will. Bab-Y/N, you have no idea what you mean to me and I know I’m shit at showing it to you but I swear, I swear none of what he said that night it’s true. What he said… I was so angry at him, I still am, if I’m being honest and that’s why I ended the friendship right there. I tried to convince myself that he was just high out of his head, that he says shitty things when he’s out of his mind and the only way to make him shut up was by following along to what he was saying. And I know it sounds stupid, fuck.. I don’t even know why I did it! At that moment I was just thinking that I didn’t want the night to end in an endless fight with him cause there was no way of shutting him up and now I wish I would’ve just kicked him out the minute your name came out of his mouth. I hate him and I hate myself for the pain I caused you. I know that it would be useless to say that if I knew you were there I would’ve ended it right there. But I know that even doing it behind your back was an act of disrespect and I’m so sorry. You didn’t deserve any of that, any of the pain or the tears… I’m still haunted by the memory of you leaving.

What I said that night was true. I had never and would never cheat on you, that’s not who I am and you know it. I wasn’t even going to go to that stupid club and meet the girl he wanted to introduce me. You gotta believe me on that one, I would’ve never forgiven myself if I did it. I can’t even forgive the thought of it or even the simple thought of faking to consider it for Mitchy to shut up… I would have never-”

“I believe you” You say.

Somewhere along his speech your eyes stopped trying to keep the tears at bay and just let them roll down your cheeks and into your shirt. You watched as he paced the room, trying his best to come up with the right words to apologize to you, to make you believe him when in reality you believed in him since the moment he walked through the door. You knew Calum and you know that his heart is always true. But his words did not make anything better.

“I believe you, Calum. I do. I just-” You snuffle “You said you just didn’t want to start a fight… Am I not worth fighting for?”

Calum almost ran to you when he noticed the tears. He always hated to see you cry, but now more than anything knowing that he’s the reason for your sadness.

“Baby, I’d start a war for you.” He said, cupping your face with his hands and delicately wiping your tears with his thumb “I’m sorry it took me so long to realize, but I’d do anything for you, my love. Anything.”

“Then why didn’t you?” You cried, pushing yourself away from him.

Calum’s heart broke once again when you pushed him away. He wanted nothing more than to console you but he knew he didn’t have the right to do so.

“Because I failed to realize that there was a possibility of you not being with me anymore” He said, confidently “When I think of you, I think of forever. I never thought that it will ever come to an end, that you could leave me at any point or that the love will just fade away… I thought about a family together, a life where it will always be you and me. I got too confident that I ended up losing you. I failed you, Y/N. I know I did, and I can’t forgive myself for that”

His eyes were honest as they stared at you. You could feel the burn in your throat as you tried to speak “I thought of a forever with you as well” You said softly.

Calum took a step closer. It was the first time he’d ever let his heart hope for some kind of saving grace, for some kind of forgiveness and a start over “Then, say we can try again. Say that we can get through this and we can fix it, because I want nothing more than to fix this and go back to what we once had, or to start over if you want! I just need you in my life, Y/N. Tell me we’ll be alright”

He knew it was a long shot, but he had to try. He didn’t take the chance to defend her before, but he was sure he was not going to let her go again if there was still a chance of a future together.

“I don’t know if we can”

Every ounce of hope fled through Calum’s hands as he processed what you said. He could feel the earth under his feet start to shake as his world came crumbling down once again.

“Calum, I knew you never cheated on me and I appreciate your honesty.” You said as you wiped out your tears with the back of your hand “But the simple thought of you considering it broke every trust I had in you, even if you weren’t being serious about it, I can’t stop picturing you with some random girl while I waited for you at home every night. And not only that but the words you said that night still haunt me. Mitchy’s comments weren’t as insulting as the fact that you didn’t contradict him in any way. I felt humiliated, Calum. Humiliated by someone I loved in front of someone who you knew didn’t like me and would take any chance he’d get to demonstrate that.

It took me weeks to realize that I didn’t do anything wrong, but I still believed that that was the perception you had of me all this time. How can I come back from that?”

Calum’s eyes were pleading, his expression remaining unmoving from the pain that he caused himself by hurting you. But he was determined to make it right.

“We can!” Calum said, desperately trying to reach for your touch as he grabbed your hand and started kissing it “Baby, no. No, no no no please don’t say that. I love you with all my heart and it kills me to know that I’ve wronged you. I’ll make it up for it, everyday for the rest of my life but, please, at least say we can try. I- I know I don’t deserve it, but please. I can’t live without you”

You pulled your hand away from him, slowly as you watched the tears pour down out of his eyes “I thought I couldn’t live without you either. And yet, I am. I’m learning to live my life for myself rather than living it for the both of us-”

“I never asked you to do it”

“You didn’t have to. I wanted to. I wanted your dreams to be mine and to be by your side cause I thought that’s the only thing I wanted in life, but I don’t know anymore, Calum. All my dreams were shared with you that I don’t even know if I have some of my own!” You watched Calum’s face slowly lose all kinds of hope he had left and you know you should’ve felt at least a little bit guilty, but that’s not the case. On the contrary, it felt like you deserve this time for yourself “But now I need to find myself, find what I want and what’s good for me and I need to do that alone.

I can’t force my feelings, and I cannot force myself to trust you again when I can’t. Calum, you have to understand that you are a whole new person for me now. I used to believe that you would never hurt me and then, you did”

Calum’s knees fell to the floor as he reached for you once again, holding onto your legs as he desperately tried to make you stay. Stay in any form or way, stay in love with him, stay with him, stay… anything for you not to disappear from his life once again.

“Please, don’t.” He pleaded at your feet “I won’t forgive myself for this. I’m so sorry, my love. My Y/N. Please, don’t. I can’t love anyone but you”

You gripped his shoulders, trying to stay balanced as the curly haired man cried, making you shred a new set of tears again “Oh, but you will.” You reassured him, hoping your tone was convincing enough “Your heart is big enough to love again, to love better. Of course you will”

“But I don’t want to” He separated from you, long enough for you to crouch down in front of him so you could wipe some tears from his face “D-do you want to?” He asked softly.

You saw yourself reflected on his red, puffy eyes. He was never a man that could share his emotions so openly and, even though you’ve seen him cry before, the sight in front of you completely shattered your heart, knowing that his was utterly broken as well. But you can’t lie about your feelings, even if they hurt.

“I don’t know what I want.” You whispered to him.

Suddenly, you hear the front door opened as Ashton’s loud and cheering voice came floating towards your ears. Your eyes widen at the thought of his possible reaction, he’d hate to see Calum here, knowing that he specifically asked him to leave you alone until you were ready to see him, but he’d hate more the fact that you are crying.

“Y/N! I couldn't find that weird ingredient you asked, so I had to ask a lady there that seemed like she could cook and she said that this will work better on your-”

His eyes fall to the floor where you are kneeling down beside Calum. His eyes flickered between you and him, showing all kinds of emotions as he took in the scenario in front of him. He noticed that you were crying and he was about to ask what the hell was going on, but you beat him to it.

You got up and wiped some tears from your face as you walked up to Ashton, grabbed his hand and led him to the kitchen. He reluctantly followed, leaving Calum alone in the living room.

“Okay, what the fuck?” Ashton asks in a hushed tone as he sets the groceries on the kitchen counter “What is he doing here?”

You sighed “I don’t know. Everything is fine Ash, don’t worry. He came to apologize and-”

“Did he say anything to make you cry?” He asked with concern. His hands were cupping your face as he wiped some tears from your puffy eyes, yet his hazel eyes never left your gaze for a second.

“We are both crying, Ashton. It’s fine”

You notice he is not convinced at all, but he won’t fight you on this. You’ve come so far that he is confident that you can defend and stand up for yourself again. He’s seen you broken so many times in the past few months, but he’s also seen you pick yourself up piece by piece like a phoenix.

“Are you okay?” Was the only thing he said. You can’t blame him for being protective of you, and you appreciated that. After all this time he is the only comfort you know won’t leave you behind.

“I will be, don’t worry” You said with a smile. He smiled back at you.

“I will always worry, love. Want me to leave you alone with him? I don’t want to but I feel like I won’t have a choice either way” You nod, “I’ll be down the hall if you need me to kick him out. I love you” He said, placing a kiss to your forehead and giving you a hug.

“I love you, too” You respond as he walks away.

You take a minute to compose yourself before going back to the living room where Calum is waiting.

Calum, on his part, was already on his feet. The tears were drying themselves on his cheeks as he watched you enter the room again.

“Sorry about that,” You said “He gets-”

“Protective, I know” Calum completes the phrase “He loves you, so I get it”

There is an awkward silence between the two of you, almost like if a wall was standing in the middle of the room, separating both of you in different paths. There were so many things left unsaid, like the way Calum felt guilty after seeing you with Ashton and realizing what he should’ve done months ago, or the way you noticed how he was closing up again, shutting himself out from his own feelings, but you both knew that now it wasn’t the time. You didn’t even know if that time would come.

Calum was the first one to talk after a while “And I get what you’re saying, I really do and I support you in every way… But I mean it when I say that i don’t want love if it’s not you” You sighed.

“And what will happen if it’s not me, then?”

He stays quiet,but a tiny smile creeps on his face as he is trying to offer you some comfort “I guess we’ll find out. But I’ll wait for you, Y/N. I will always wait for you cause I know that we belong together. And I promise I will spend the rest of my life trying to make it right for you. To prove my love for you”

“I can’t ask you to do that, and I won’t” You say after a while “We both need to figure ourselves out, to find a life without the other one around, and, if we do end up together, then that’s beautiful. But you have to be open to the possibility of another ending, Calum. I cannot stand around and watch you waste your life away”

Calum nods, he knows you are right, but that doesn’t mean he likes what you are saying. He will respect your decision, though. He knows his love isn’t fragile.

He knows that it was his time to go. He knows that he could still say so much, he could still apologize ten thousand more times and claim his love till infinity, but he knows you won’t change your mind and he can’t, no, he won’t blame you for that. So he turns to leave, but before he gets the chance to do it, you grab him by the arm and pull him for one last hug.

You don’t know what came over you, but a voice inside of you begged you to hold him closer, just one more time and remember what it felt like to be wrapped inside his embrace. And as you held each other close, somehow you both knew that this was a goodbye.

“This is it?” He asks after a silent moment of tears and snuffles, with face hidden in the crook of your neck, taking in your perfume and engraving it in his memory.

“I’m not sure,” You say “It might be”

“If it is. Could you lie and tell me you love me?” Calum pleads “Just for one last time?”

You pull him closer to you, “I could lie and tell you that I don’t”

Tags: @iknowyouthinkimbulletproof @talksoprettyjjx @mystic-232

And I also wanna tag some of the beautiful people who asked for a part 2, I hope you liked it ✨ @theshyspy @wonderlandiswhereitsatyo @wontlastimokwiththat @wldflwercal Thank you ❤️

#calum hood #5 seconds of summer #5sos #calum hood angst #calum hood fanfiction #calum hood imagine #calum hood fic #suchalonelysunflower #fanfic #calum imagine #calum 5SOS #calum 5 seconds of summer #ashton irwin #calum x reader #calum hood x reader #calum x you #calum hood 5sos #calum hood 5 seconds of summer #5 seconds of summer fanfiction #5sos fic #5sos angst #5sos dam #calum rec #part 2 #tell me what you’re thinking #tell me a lie

[serenasoutherlyns]

Not a Summer Crush Part Three

a/n: this one has some very fun special guests. bonus points for past calvak (s/o @storiesofsvu) in this one, and generally very fun cute pining. any feedback is forever appreciated!!!!!

Part Three

A week after you all had drinks, Rita Calhoun flew into Casey's office with a truly impressive amount of speed, banging the door against the wall, causing Casey to jump in her seat.

"Christ, Rita!" she said, catching her breath. Rita stared at Casey, like she was waiting for her to admit something. Casey had no clue what. "Can I help you with something?"

"Casey Marie Cabot Novak," Rita began. Oh God, not the whole full name, she thought.

"What did I do?" Casey asked, running her current cases over in her head, trying to come up with a place where she could've messed up. It was after the last jury of the day, and she was going over her usual end-of-the-day routine.

Rita closed her eyes and breathed. "Casey. Please tell me that you aren't having an affair with Caroline Haley."

That was not what Casey was expecting.

"What!?" Casey tried to say more things, but her brain was buzzing far too loudly. Where on earth had Rita gotten that idea?

"Don't play dumb with me Casey, just tell me, yes or no, are you sleeping with her."

"Literally, no? Absolutely not, obviously no, in no way am I having an affair with my junior colleague; and I resent your implication that I would, and I resent how you just barged in here and yelled at me."

Rita looked satisfied. Either she'd convinced her that she was telling the truth, or whatever authority she'd received this intel from was unreliable.

Casey continued in a more subdued tone of voice. "Who said I was sleeping with Caroline."

Rita took a deep breath. "Nobody did. I just guessed, and when all the pieces fell into place, I freaked out a bit." Casey looked at her. "I think the lady protests too much, though."

Usually, Casey would come back at her with an equally witty comment, correct Rita’s misquote, or, if she was feeling particularly flustered or tired, throw something. Instead, she sunk into her chair and hid her face in her hands, clearly distraught.

"Casey? What's wrong?" Rita asked, trying to pull her best approximation of sweetness out for her friend.

"You're right."

"I'm right you two are..."

"NO!" Casey almost yelled. "No," she reiterated quietly.

"What am I right about then?" Rita asked, somehow more confused than she was when she thought there was something illicit going on.

"I have feelings for her? I guess?"

"Oh, Casey. Did you tell Alex? I mean, it's pretty normal to be attracted to people other than your spouse..." Rita had taken a seat on her couch, obviously a bit uncomfortable with all this sharing of emotions.

Casey had progressed from the startled rage to a quiet sniffle, the kind one gets when they try to keep themself from crying.

"No," a sniff, "she told me."

"Alex noticed?"

"Alex brought it up. About a month ago."

"So, Alex is the one having an affair?" Casey dotted at her face with a tissue, collecting her composure.

"No, she isn't. Um, there's no good way to say it, but... We both wish we were, all having an affair, I guess? but we aren't?"

Rita whistled, a low bell noise. "That's... a situation for sure."

"It is."

"How did that conversation go? 'Hey babe, I like that new junior ADA, we should try to get her to be our third?'"

Casey scoffed. "No? We're not going to ask her out."

"Why not?" Casey just gave her a look, between incredulity and intrigue."I mean, you two are hot, she's gay, and literally nobody could turn you down."

"That's it though, isn't it? She's ten years younger than me, and we're kind of in charge of her at work. The power imbalance is less than ideal." Casey said, wistfully.

"You were sleeping with Mary Clark when you were 27," Rita said with a shrug.

Casey looked her in the eye. "How did you know that?"

---

Alex knocked very gently on Serena's office door. It was the end of the workday and Serena would be nearly done for the evening. A quiet "come in" came from inside, and Alex did.

Serena noticed something was wrong immediately. Alex always wondered how her friend was so perceptive.

"What's going on, Alex?" Serena asked, knowing that Alex didn't show up without texting unless something happened, in fact, she hardly ever made the trek uptown to her office space unannounced. She noticed a faraway look in Alex's eyes, saw her bite her lip, telltale signs that something was bothering her.

Alex closed the door behind her, leant against one of the comfy chairs in Serena's office. Alex always thought that if Serena wasn't such a good lawyer and passionate advocate, she should've been a therapist. Any space she was in was calm (really, she fit her name).

“Casey and I are, having a problem, I guess.”

Serena rose from behind her desk and met Alex, hugging her tightly. “Oh, sweetheart, I’m sorry.” She let go, sat down, and motioned for Alex to do the same. “What kind of problem, Lex?”

Alex laced her fingers together and then tugged them apart. “It’s Caroline,” she began. “Haley,” she added, like Serena wouldn’t know who she was talking about.

Serena looked at her expecting her to go on. When she didn’t, she asked, “Is she ok?” Alex nodded. “What happened?” Alex’s expression turned more worried, she looked away from Serena. Not a good sign. Serena ventured a guess, hoping she wasn’t right. “Casey isn’t…” Alex shook her head. “Good.”

Serena paused, even more unwilling to imply what she was about to, “Are you?”

“God no,” Alex said, whispering. Serena wondered why Alex even came to her, knowing how self-reliant she was. So... If nobody is having an affair? Serena gave Alex one of her classic looks, that always made Alex feel like her mind was being read. Serena knows that it isn’t that, but it never fails to get her to talk. If nothing else, Alex hates silence.

Alex breathed deeply and tried to calm her hands. She flips the conversation over. “What do you think of her, Ser?” Serena waited a moment to answer, hoping that Alex would open up before she said anything, but seeing that would not be happening, Serena thought about her question.

“I think she’s a wonderful attorney,” she began, knowing full well that your legal prowess was not what was stressing Alex out. “She’s obviously really smart, um, she seems to care a lot about her friends... she’s really pretty, um, I like her, I guess? I don’t know her that well, Lex.”

“Yeah. Yeah.” Serena looked at Alex again, as if to tell her that she was done talking for now. “Um, she’s,” Alex swallowed, took a sip from the travel mug she always carried, “unreasonably beautiful.”

Serena was taken aback at her friend’s choice of words, how she felt about the young attorney, yet, there was no affair happening, apparently. “Strong words. But, if neither of you are sleeping with her, what’s bothering you so much?”

Alex turned her gaze up towards the ceiling. “That neither of us is sleeping with her?”

Serena turned her eyebrows up, then narrowed her eyes, pushed her lips out, considering all the things that Alex could be implying as well as all the ways she could react. She opted for some humor, hoping to shock her friend out of her state. “All this over a threesome you haven’t had?”

It worked, and Alex gave her a thin laugh. “I guess so, yeah. Um, I don’t think either of us just want to have sex, though. I think it’s gone a little beyond that.”

Seeing Alex cheer up, Serena allowed herself to react more spontaneously. “Oh my god. You have a crush, and Casey has a crush.” Serena had an open mouthed expression on her face, the kind that would usually bother Alex when it’s at her expense.

Alex bit her lip into a sweet smile. “Casey’s pretty cute about it, too.”

“You should talk to her, Lex.” Serena said.

---

Ramin was sitting at the counter reading texts while you washed that night’s dinner dishes, drinking a glass of the basil lemonade you’d made (mixed with gin for the adults). Ramin could tell something had been bothering you all week, so he’d made your favorite for dinner, khoresh bademjan and rice (every time Ramin cooked, you thanked Ashley for having the sense to marry an Iranian man instead of the string of other French people he’d dated before him). You two had let Ashley go to bed early-- his company had a big premiere in a week that he was consumed by. The girls were long asleep. You danced around to the Googoosh album that Ramin had over the stereo, making him laugh with your dramatic interpretations of the violin lines. You got contemplative as you scrubbed a plate.

“Hey, Ram?” You asked as you stilled your feet and hands.

“Yeah, babes?” He replied, still looking at his phone.

“When you met Ashley, how did you know what you wanted, or that you wanted something with him?” You put the plate down, played with the sponge, turned around. Ramin bit his lip and looked at you. He turned down the music.

“I never like, made a conscious effort to decipher any of that. It was always very natural with him.”

“You never felt like, I don’t know, like, confused?”

Ramin shook his head. “No, no I didn’t. But Ash is so, uh, forthcoming,”

“Demanding,” you interrupted,

“I never had to guess with him,” he finished.

You nodded, picked up a pot to wash.

"Like, we were both single dads, so Léa wasn't an issue. And he never resented Lowell."

"People really did that?"

"You'd be surprised at how many people are jealous of a dead man," Ramin said, looking at the photo on the wall of his late husband with a newborn Léa. "Ash never was. And I just kinda, knew, you know?"

"I don’t, actually," you replied quietly. Ramin hummed.

"Why do you ask? You got a crush?"

You thought about outright denying it, going forward with your old strategy: deny your feelings until they disappear. But Ramin would know you were lying; and you were growing tired of pretending. Every wall that you'd built over the past few months knowing Casey and Alex started to crack. They wouldn't fall just yet. You shrugged noncommittally.

“Have you ever thought about what would happen if you met someone else?”

“God, I try not to.”

“No, like, someone you both want to, I don’t know, pursue.”

Ramin raised his eyebrows, took a sip of his drink. Smiled at you.

“Did someone ask you to have a threesome?”

Your cheeks burned and you held the pan up above your face. “No, but, ah, I think I want them to?”

Ramin’s jaw dropped, half natural reaction half exaggerated fascination. “Juicy,” he said.

“Pfft,” you replied to his teasing.

“Anyways, no I haven’t thought about that. I imagine it would be a lot of conversations and figuring out what everyone wanted. But also, like, I’m too old for that. And we have the girls and very busy jobs, I don’t think either of us has the mental or physical energy for that kind of thing,” said Ramin.

“You’re not that old.”

“I’m 35,” he said, lifting his shoulders and finishing his lemonade, motioning for you to get the pitcher back out of the fridge. He filled his glass again.

“You’re going to finish that before any of us get a second glass.” Ramin did not acknowledge your admonishment.

“I’m 35 and a widower with three kids. I think I get to call myself old.”

“Only because Ashley’s younger than you.”

“And you are a veritable infant.” Ramin retorted, eliciting a wounded look from you, then resolved to return to you. “So, who’re the lucky ladies?”

You groaned as you put away the sponge, the brush, the soap, and the dish towels. The kettle you had put on whistled. “Casey and Alex,” you replied with some effort not to explode at being genuine and sharing your feelings with a friend.

Ramin gave you a repeat of his earlier performance, except this time his jaw dropped in actual shock. “Lina!” He whisper-shouted, in the way one does when they’re trying not to wake up their daughters and grumpy husband. He whistled. “Did they ask you out?”

You bit your lip. “No. But, I wish they would?”

“You won’t get very far with wishing,” Ramin said, already having moved on to strategy, ever the analytical presence. “Also, you have to introduce me first.”

“I don’t have to do anything for you,” you said, teasingly, pouring the now-slightly cooled water from the kettle over a bag of mint tea and moving to the couch, Ramin following your lead.

“How hasn’t Ashley already told me all of this?” Ramin asked, citing Ashley’s famous inability to keep a secret.

“He doesn’t know,” you said.

Ramin nodded as he sipped his drink, then placed it on a coaster. “Probably smart.” He paused, got a mischievous look in his eyes. “I thought you didn’t do pining?”

You muffled a frustrated yell with a throw pillow.

---

"Mary told me," Rita said, "when you and I were involved," Casey gave a pained smile, remembering her first few years as an ADA in white collar, "she congratulated me, actually." Casey's eyes went blank. "I could've sworn I told you that then. What, Case, people talk about people. And she was right."

Casey let it be silent in her office for a moment. "OK, you knowing the details of my sexual past aside," she said, "what made you think I was having an affair?" She didn't want there to be any gossip around the office that could hurt you.

Rita took a second, looking very much the same as she did when she was preparing an argument in court. "Three things. You've been all jumpy and nervous, Alex has been spacey, and I mentioned you to Caroline and she got this enamored grin," Rita noticed Casey seemed surprised by her last point. "I realized as I was walking over to give you this, actually," she said, reaching into her messenger bag and producing a folded blue paper. "Sorry."

Casey sighed, reading the motion. Back to earth. "OK, Calhoun. See you later," she said, as good as shooing the lawyer from her office. They shared a quick hug before Rita left.

"Hey, Casey, if it matters, I think you should talk to her," Rita said as she left.

"I'll keep that in mind."

---

" I will," Alex said, "I have, kind of. Mostly to point out all the reasons it wouldn't work."

Serena considered. "What about all the reasons it would? I mean, you all get along well, your friends like her, it seems like it could be perfect, if you and Casey are on the same page?"

"The stakes are too high," said Alex, "what if she's not into us? What if it gets us in trouble at work, what would happen if we broke up with her? Or what if it breaks me and Casey up?" The last question she raised genuinely shook her up, Serena could tell.

"Those things are all bad, for sure," Serena replied. "I guess the question would be, is it scarier to find out or to never know?"

"I'm not sure. Hell, she probably wouldn't be into either of us, I mean, I'm 15 years older than her and we both have all kinds of baggage, it's kind of part of why we work; and she certainly must get lots of attention, I mean, she's beautiful," Alex stopped talking abruptly as she saw Serena's laughter. "What's funny?"

"Nothing," said Serena, "it's just that I haven't seen you this nervous about anybody besides Casey.

---

"What are you going to do about it?" Ramin asked you once the dramatics had passed.

"I mean," you said, "nothing? What is there to do about it? I can't pursue them, not without losing my job, so I'm going to have to just get over it."

"Or you could seduce them. Make use of your feminine wiles."

You rolled your eyes.

"Flirt," Ramin said, clarifying.

"Can one use their feminine wiles if all parties are women? I mean, aren't they just wiles?" You asked him.

"I don't know, you should find out," he said. Before you could get angry, he continued, "seriously. You should flirt with them, so they either know you're interested and they go for it, or they get too overwhelmed by how amazing you are and go for it in spite of themselves."

You looked at him. "Damn, Ram. For a guy who's only had three partners you really have some ideas about strategy."

He shrugged. "The worst that can happen is they don't respond to you, and then you know. Obviously, keep it appropriate and flirt with them both so it doesn't seem like you're trying to be a homewrecker."

"Maybe," you said, thinking.

---

#casey novak #alex cabot #calex #calex x reader #alex cabot x reader #casey novak x reader #svu fanfiction #svu fanfic #svu #fluff!! rita calhoun! #rita calhoun #serena southerlyn

[uhhhhyandere]

👉👈 more yandere dimitri pls,,, that last one you wrote,,,, WHEW

haha idk where this was going or like... what the plot is or even what it’s about... but i had fun HAHAHA and literally all that matters 

so here’s 8k words of purple prose and pointlessness and idk what else i love him so much... also not proofread bc I'm lazy. y’all stan a lazy ass author. 

warnings: gory, death of minor characters, kinda bloody too, injury, manipulation

”It’s stupid. I-I don’t think… I just don’t want to get my hopes up, Annie. It’s been years…” With Garreg Mach looming on the cliffside, memories began to resurface with each field and decrepit village you, Annette, and Mercedes passed. They were fields where you would train relentlessly in the early hours of the day. An excuse, you think, to see him more. Innocent enough. Who wouldn’t want to improve their skill with the future King of Faerghus? Under those very trees is where you would have clandestine meetings at the same time beginning after the celebration of your victory at the Battle of the Eagle and Lion. Undeniably, the best night of your life. 

You silently thanked Sylvain for slipping into the wine cellars and claiming you all had to finish the stolen bottles and clear the evidence. The only people still okay enough that night to do any cleaning were Mercedes and Dedue. Felix was technically okay too, but he left far before Annette was vomiting in the washroom to actually help out. 

Your drunken first kiss at your bedroom door that Dedue definitely did not see. The sober one the day after. The sneaky one after breakfast. Quick one after training. Goddess, the heavy one in the dead of night after you scurried upstairs that Sylvain and Felix one hundred percent did not overhear through the paper-thin walls of the dorms. Countless kisses under the shadow of covers, night, until the ball. If everyone and their mothers didn’t suspect something was up when you two did not even realize you were the only pair left dancing, all eyes on you, until Sylvain whistled from the crowd, well, you would be deathly concerned about them.

“But those memories are from a long time ago, Mercie.” You pulled yourself from your thoughts. “Thinking about them only hurts. This place, what’s left of it, only hurts.” Mercedes set a gentle hand on your shoulder. “You think after five whole years, it wouldn’t hurt as much, but I don’t think I’ll be okay until this war is over. Until the cause of this - of all this pain and misery - is put to rest. Back then, even if we could have died at the end of any month, I thought he was invincible. I fled Fhirdiad as soon as I heard. Like a coward.”

“You can’t honestly think that! The Empire was taking the city. If you stayed, you could have died too! Don’t think like that.” You rolled your head back to look at the dark sky. You would make it back before it starts, at the very least. 

“Everyone grieves in different ways, and it courses through us all at different paces. You have to let yourself hurt.” You shook your head, beginning to see the shadow of the village at the base of the monastery. 

“I’ve been hurting for years now. When I met up with Felix in Fraldarius territory, he told me that the distraction will get me killed. An hour later he saved my life in battle, so he's ever the same. I wonder if he decided to show today. Sylvain would inevitably follow then. I’ve always thought--hey, do you hear that?” You stopped your movements suddenly, holding your arms to stop them as well. FIghting. 

“Is it the Empire?”

“I don’t know, but we should help out anyway,” Annette replied. “Come on!” 

You expected the Empire, but you weren’t surprised when you encountered thieves attempting to saunter off with the abandoned riches of the monastery. It was just like any other weekend you were off the road of bandits with the Blue Lions to clear a path for bandits. 

Until you saw him. A ghost. As pale as one, at least. A hulking, nearly unrecognizable mass of strength shrouded in black and blue. Relentless, he tore through his path of thieves, the professor and Gilbert hot on his trail. The… professor? They were alive too? Your hand shook at your side. They’re both… okay? You swallowed. The professor always did tend to micromanage Dimitri. You realized you could not swallow with a closing throat, wobbling along with your chest. Wheezing, crying, freezing in battle. You heard Mercedes and Annette all around you behind a wall of fog. Legs shaking, you fell to the ground, hand tight to your chest. 

“Y/N, come on, get up!” It was Annette’s urging, but she stopped suddenly. Two sets of feet set up around you. A barrier to protect you as your muscles shook. Get up. You have to. Get off the ground and fight. Just as he always taught you. 

Your bow came out quick, sniping an enemy in Mercedes’ blind spot. Before you can do anything, argue it was your imagination that conjured the sound of his grunts and the blue of his eye, you had to survive to see them and keep track of Sylvain in the corner of your eye. He still tended to always look right instead of left. Were you not so shaken up, you would have reacted to seeing the rest of your old house in battle, but your mind kept filtering back. You did not see him again in battle. He and the professor were far ahead, after the familiar bandit you had dealings with from Anna, with the remaining three bandits. You, Annette, and Mercedes went to secure the area to make sure there was no bandit unaccounted for. 

Didn’t last, though, as you fell to the ground against the foundations of a destroyed house, legs outstretched and limp. With your palm being held tightly over your mouth, you squeezed your eyes tight to get any remaining liquid out.

“Y/N…” 

“H-he’s alive.” 

“We know. We saw-”

“He’s alive. I spent five years grieving for someone who was here. I-I should have known he was here. I thought about it. I thought about it, but then I second-guessed myself and said that it would only hurt more. Searching for the dead. Pining for them, but look. I-I don’t know. I don’t know if I can even face him.”

“And you don’t want to.” Felix’s voice was just as sharp as it always was. He was grimacing, pace fast as he joined the three of you. “He is not the Prince you fell in love with. He’s the boar that’s been festering underneath his polite smile” With an exhale through your nose, you looked away. Felix really could read you like a book. He scoffed. “You knew too, didn’t you? All this time. Of course. I shouldn’t have put it past you to push things under the rug as you always do.” 

“Felix…” 

“It’s true. It’s how they even got through the relationship. Not as perfect as you thought, huh?” 

“Felix, I think that’s enough.”

“No,” you interrupted. “He’s right. I knew. I was at the rebellion. I was at that battle that is ingrained into Felix’s memory. I was in the Holy Mausoleum when we found out the Flame Emperor's identity, but he never told me… I didn’t know the extent. You all knew he would hide me from all harm, including himself. Do you really think he would tell me whatever plagues him now? Though, I could take a good guess after spending a few nights in his room back then.” You swallowed, wiping away the remnants of your tears. “How bad is he?”

“A lowly beast.” 

“There you all are. Professor says to regroup. Says we have plans to discuss, if you all are interested - woah, you okay?” Sylvain scratched the back of his head. “Oh right, yeah. Well, I don’t know how long His Majesty is willing to wait. He looks pretty - uh - impatient.” You shook your head and used the wall to support you back to your feet. 

“Reunions like this are usually supposed to be happy, aren’t they? I-I’m sorry I’m ruining it on you all. I really am so relieved to see you all okay. It’s just… there’s a lot of emotion going on right now.” It was Mercedes’ hand on your back. You needn’t look to know. 

“You don’t have to face anything you aren’t ready for.”

“No, I need to see what he has become. It’s as Felix says. I can no longer ignore problems I must face. I can do it, but we still have to check the perimeter…” Sylvain shook his head. 

“Teach had Ashe and Ingrid do it right after you left.” Your professor always knew you better than you could ever know. “Well, let’s go then. Don’t want to keep them waiting on us too long.” His brown eyes came in close. “You hardly look like you’ve been crying, if that helps.”

“It doesn’t!” Annette stomped on his foot. “Y/N, it’s going to be okay. Me and Mercie are right with you!” A smile broke out on your face. Albeit sad, you nodded your head and believed her. Though you both knew, in the scheme of things, you were alone in this battle. 

“Sorry, teach. You know Felix. Walks like a grandpa.” Sylvain, as common as it is for him to be the asshole, was a kind soul. No matter how much he tried to hide it. You gifted him a small smile of thanks as he glanced back. You were in the back of the small group when you joined the semicircle surrounding Gilbert, Byleth and… and… you couldn’t do this. 

His hair has grown long and unkempt. Grease and grime painted his hair, his skin, his clothes. The armor he wore just a few shades darker than the circles under his single remaining eye but, oh, it still glittered brighter than the rainy sky. That was his eye. Though only one remained, it was his. This was your Dimitri. You clenched your teeth, for you could not cry anymore. Even if this Dimitri, from what you have heard, would not care for your tears, Dimitri five years ago would. You would stay strong for him if no one else. 

And when his eye met yours, goddess, the jolt was felt down your spine. You knew your face screamed your emotions. You were no Felix, Slyvain, or Byleth. Lips parting, your breath halted as he kept your gaze. Nothing on him reacted. Goddess, his gaze was so much more piercing. You did not dare to move.  As if you were a stranger, his eye flicked back to Gilbert as the knight continued to speak. Annette grabbed your hand from beside you and you squeezed so hard you watched her wince, yet she remained steadfast in holding yours just as tight. 

For the mornings spent under the trees in the field after training, you would not cry. Dimitri is alive. He is here. A few steps away, though miles remained in between, he was alive. Within his dead eye, people will find hope. You will find hope. You know Gilbert already has as he speaks about returning to the monastery to begin to plan for the retaliation against the Empire. You know the former Blue Lions have as well, as they follow the professor loyally back up the ruined stairs you used to trip on far too often. You wondered if Dimitri can feel your eyes on the back of his head, or if he has come to be numb to that as well. 

Annette did not let go of your hand until it was out of shock in the chapel. Its remnants littering the floors. Still, the peace of the goddess remained. Its silence was a lullaby to your worries. She, it had to be her, brought back the ones you love most. There was no other power. There couldn’t have been. Even though there was a hole where she used to stand, you thanked the rain beginning to pour in.

You would be strong for the boy Dedue would sneak you to in the dead of night. To wherever the Duscur man maybe, you would do it for him, too. 

But being brave and strong was always easy for the people in Ashe’s books. They did not hesitate through their fear. It pushed them to be the heroes they are, but you could not find that platform to jump from. A mouse approaching a wolf, a boar. You sought help from the expert himself. 

“Have you? I mean, have you tried to talk to him?” Ashe fiddled with the padding on his glove. 

“No, not yet. Felix, Ingrid, Sylvain, and Mercedes have, though. You should ask them. They can probably be more help than me.” Stepping onto the wall separating Garreg Mach from the cliff, you sat next to him, allowing your feet to dangle in the open air. 

“No, I think I need someone as scared as me. Someone who wants to be a knight from one of your books, but is the measly coward in the back used for poetic comparisons. Not that you are. I’m talking about me.” Ashe shook his head. 

“It’s only been a few days since we’ve arrived.”

“And you think I would have already sought out the man I fell in love with already? A faithful reunion. Not quite like the ones in the romances.” 

“I don’t think anything going on is anything like a book.” You furrowed your brows. “I know that’s crazy coming from me, but no book is like another. They have similarities, but they are all inherently different. This one we’re in now, this is ours. This is what people will be reading about and looking to for help. Us. No book can help us right now. I think only we can help ourselves and each other.” You kicked your heel against the wall repeatedly. It wasn’t what you wanted to hear. “You should try. If Dimitri will listen to anyone, it’s you or the professor, and they tried already.” You could feel your throat beginning to close up.

“What do I even say? What if I say the wrong thing? He’s hurt, Ashe. He always has been. I don’t want to… I can’t push him more. He’s not off the deep end yet. He can’t be. I don’t want to be the final straw. I know what I’ll say if I get too… emotional.” The man sighed, green eyes scanning the clouds. 

“Well, from my humble opinion, which you don’t have to take, is that, if what you’re saying is true, you’re hurting him by avoiding him.” He stopped fiddling with the leather. Instead, he placed his hand on your thigh. “He is, deep down, the same Dimitri we know. What if he was the same, and you were doing this?”

“That’s debating if he is the same underneath. Knights are torn, but I know he’s there. He wouldn’t so easily feed into it. I know it. It may be time and so much help, but he’s in there. This is part of him. This is not an imposter. This is just as much of him as the one we knew so well. It… has to be, because I don’t know what I’m going to do if it’s not.”

Nights seem to be falling earlier and earlier with nonstop cleaning, repairs, and supply running. Even if you wanted to, you lacked the time to seek the prince out. The greenhouse had to be fixed. The rubble had to be cleared. The holes had to be patched. Communication had to be made. Word was the Knights of Seiros would be arriving this evening. Preparations had to be made for that. How the hell did Cyril do this day-in and day-out? 

You were exhausted by the time Seteth and company arrived and set to meet in the chapel. The second time you’ve seen Dimitri since the bandits. The millionth time war efforts were to be discussed. Most of that work was carried out by Byleth and Gilbert. You only needed to follow orders, and your orders were to clean. Sorting out your emotions was just a side job.

“Y/N. Y/N. Are you listening?” Seteth’s scolding, something etched into your brain from the academy, broke you from your thoughts. However, you first regarded Dimitri, who looked at you the same as he did the first time, before having the courage to look at Seteth. 

“I-I’m sorry. Lost in my own thoughts.” 

“I asked if you have heard anything from Aegir? I know you were in contact with Ferdinand during the past five years.” Dimitri’s eye burned holes through your head. You could feel the sweat from it on your scalp. 

“Duke Aegir has been placed under house arrest, sir. Everything from their title and land has been stripped from them. I… haven’t heard anything since. It would be safe to presume that they will not be an in with the Empire.” Yours and Ferdinand’s history stretches only back to the academy; however, before you and Dimitri became official, you and he would occasionally… work some stress out. Casually. Dimitri always hated this fact, but he did his best to hide the jealousy from you.

“It’s not fair of me to judge you on what you have done in the past,” he said. “I will be more mature about my feelings.” Though the gleam in his eye now was all too familiar. 

“I see. Thank you.” Something within you kept you from meeting Dimitri’s eye. A fear he would look away, so you focused on Seteth, Gilbert, and Byleth as they discussed the steps to making Garreg Mach the Kingdom’ base. When the meeting ended, however, you did not listen to such fear. Dimitri spent his time in the chapel. The spectacle to gawk at. It was no surprise when he did not move as the rest of the group disperse, and neither did you. 

But he would not break first. Turning around, his cape followed him back towards the wreckage of where the altar used to be. You followed with steps as silent as possible. Opening your mouth to speak, you released only empty air. Inhaling, you tried once again, but a wall erected itself in your throat, cutting you off once more. 

“If you have something to say, speak.” His words, guttural, reverberated in you. Wringing your hands together, you took one last deep breath. 

“Dimitri.” 

“Do you wish to speak of the past?” His head turned, so you could only see one eye peeking from under his bangs. “The boy you loved is long dead. There is nothing here for you.” You shook your head and took an adamant step forward. 

“T-that’s not true.” A dry laugh escaped him.

“Is it not? Are you not frightened of me? Is it not why you have hidden yourself ever since you arrived? You know it as well as I.” You tapped your fingers against your thigh. You had to remain calm and patient. He was going to try to push you away, and you knew that. Do not stray from the path. 

“It was not you I was scared of, Dimitri.” Another laugh. This one wry. He turned around to face you then. You knew he had gotten bigger, stronger, but he stood so much higher than you. A power stance you would not succumb to. This is the same boy who broke a pair of scissors and was scared Mercedes would yell at him and smuggled sweets for you two to have late at night to study for your certification exams. “Do not tell me it is because you think you could have changed something. Prevented something. Nothing would have changed whether you were here in the past five years or not. Do not think so much of yourself.” 

You squared your shoulders. You did not want to take this route, but you had to provoke some type of emotion towards you. Something to tell you that you are more than the tool of war to use against Edelgard, and he had already given you a hint. 

“Then what about at that meeting, when Seteth asked me about Ferdinand? I saw the look you gave me. I’ve seen it before too. You cannot hide that.” His jaw clenched, and for a moment, you felt successful. “You can say anything you want. How I am insignificant, a tool to use, another body to die in your path to revenge, but do not-” you pointed a finger at him “-tell me what we had was nothing. I want to see what you see. I don’t want you to shut me out.” His eyes trailed down to your finger, and with an armored, gloved hand, pushed it aside. 

“So you admit it then? A tool at my disposal. To use and then break?” You shook your head, and your throat clenched once again. 

“You would add me to the list of people who already haunt you?” 

“You know nothing of the dead. Of what they say to me. There is nothing for me to be concerned about other than taking the head off of that girl’s shoulders. Should you die getting in my way, then so be it.” His lance to the heart, but you would not let the pain show. He was the same boy who broke his training lance and hit Leonie with the broken handle and fretted about it for the next month, despite the blood on his hands. You had to believe that. Latch on to that single hope. 

“You always did what you could to protect me. From Demonic Beasts, bandits, Felix’s words, but right now, I think you’re protecting me from yourself.” Metal against your neck. In a blink of an eye, his lance touches the skin. 

“Do not speak as if you know me, and do not speak anymore, or else I will slice your throat where you stand. Go away. If you return, I will not hold back, and I will use you to the bone.” A competition played out between your eyes, but, in the end, you succeeded. Walking out the monastery with a drop of blood on your neck, you did not allow any other droplets to fall until you crossed the bridge into the reception hall. 

You don’t who you cried for, or for how long until Catherine found you and guided you back to your room. Thoughts floated from Dimitri, his words, the past, to Dedue and his untimely passing and your peers that were now your enemies that Dimitri was ready to kill without hesitation and the reality of your death that could come in any battle here on forth.  

Three knocks on your door. Too hard to be Ashe’s, Mercedes’, or Annette. Not hard enough to be Felix yelling at you to train like he used to when he could find no one else. 

“Sorry. I was just passing by, and, well, wanted to check in.” The last thing you wanted Sylvain saying was that he heard your balling your eyes out. With shaky hands, you wiped your burning cheeks and unlocked the door for him to enter. “Oh, what happened? What’s that bandage from? Don’t tell me…” You motioned for the noble to come in and relocked the door. You didn’t want any more visitors. 

“Yeah, I talked to him.” 

“He hurt you?”

“I went too far. I-I shouldn’t have pushed him so deep into his emotions, presuming things he felt. It was just a scratch. I’m fine. You have the eye, Sylvain. You must have noticed the meeting.” You sat on your bed, while he spread himself on your desk chair. 

“I remember he used to come to me during those times. How he can show his love for you through other means. How he had lost you before even had a chance to try. He was so stressed, and so hopelessly into you. I thought he had it for the professor, but color me surprised when he sought me out for advice on you.” You shook your head. 

“Never should have started that with Ferdinand.” 

“Something about nobles, huh?” 

“Shut up, Sylvain. I-Look, I can’t even focus on the past right now. I use it to remind myself I’m talking to my Dimitri, and not the monster everyone fears. That, that man suffering alone in that chapel is the boy who got nervous every time we kissed, but… but it’s so hard. As soon as I saw him that day, I was shocked, overjoyed, but I knew something was wrong the same minute. He’s been alone for five years. By himself. The only people to talk to him were the dead. What kind of… I’m supposed to be the one that knows this, sees this, and helps this, but all I can do is cry in my damned room!” Sylvain was lighting fast to wrap his arms around you, and you clung on tighter to his shoulders. The sleeve of his shirt, the victim of your tears, saliva, and sobs until you had pushed your own self out of consciousness. 

When you woke the next morning, your head lied on a breathing pillow. It did not take much to recall the previous night and you let yourself relax under human contact. It was something you have missed dearly in the past five years, and you know, despite his reputation, Sylvain would never try anything with you. Your eyes, heavy still from crying so hard, lazily trailed across the room. The window Dimitri almost broke with his lance, the desk you both hunched over figuring out the mathematical side of tactics, the potted plant the professor gave you for your birthday that Dimitri also broke, but replaced with the long dead ones present. The broken locks on your door from - 

“Sylvain!” You jolted up, slapping his chest harshly. He woke with a groan while you stood and approached the door. 

“Mm, what?”

“Did you hear anything last night? Banging, or snapping, after I fell asleep?” He rubbed your pillow over his face, so you approached him, tore it from his hands, and smacked him. “Sylvain. My door is broken.” Brown eyes were wide and glowing under the sun from the window. He rushed to check out the damage. “I think I know who would have…” He met your eyes. “Which means he saw - “

“Yeah, I get it. I’m a dead man.” You shook your head. 

“Hey, hey, not yet. We could try to guess why he would come in here.” Sylvain rolled his eyes. 

“Isn’t it obvious? It isn’t to kill you. He already would have been in the chapel. Oh - we messed up. We messed up big time. I’m so sorry, Y/N.” You put your hand on his arm.

“It’s not your fault. You were here when I was sobbing. I can’t be mad at you for that. I’m mad at this whole situation. This war. Everything. You just need to avoid him at all costs. Stay with someone. Felix most likely. We could explain the situation to him, so he understands, and so he doesn’t think we… you know.”

“I get it. I get it.” 

....

“Absolutely not.” 

“Felix, it’s only until I get this sorted.” Felix groaned, tying his hair back. 

“I’m not playing babysitter, and I’m not letting you handle this on your own. You’ll get yourself killed.” You shook your head. 

“He wouldn’t kill me.”

“He actually told you he would.”

“But he wouldn’t. I trust that he wouldn’t, and if one of the two of us were to approach him, it could not be you. Out of the question. It would have to be me, and you both know that, and it has to be as soon as possible. I mean, as in-”

“Have you all seen Dimitri?” Ingrid popped around the corner. “It’s the Empire - they’re coming. Gear up and get ready. We don’t know what forces they’re bringing, but we cannot allow them to take the monastery again.” Of course, of all times. 

“We’ll worry about this later. Do not let this distract you on the battlefield. Focus on surviving and nothing else. Got it?” Felix held a finger to your face. You nodded. “Good. Come on, Sylvain. We’ll see you out there.”

Focus on surviving. You were always focused on surviving. Battle was not merely just slaying your enemies. You were the priority. Not the oncoming enemies. That fact never changed during battle. That was the first thing the professor taught you; however, his selfless behavior on the battlefield would have anyone thinking twice. When it comes to fighting with people you cared about, priority gets muddled. 

Dimitri was no longer focused on surviving. His priority was to kill, slaughter his way to Edelgard. Nothing else mattered. In this way, his fighting has improved tenfold. No reasonable person would want to confront him in physical combat, which made life harder for everybody else. Being a distance fighter, you, Ashe, Annette, and Mercedes were able to watch his back. Of course, Byleth couldn’t risk that many people micromanaging him. For strategy’s sake, it’s suicide. Mercedes was a critical healer and menace being trained a gremory. That source of power would not and could not be squandered. Ashe had worked incredibly hard to be a bow knight, and your most powerful archer can also not be used as a protector of one person. 

The job usually came down to you. Both by order of elimination and by your lack of ability to focus elsewhere. Your eyes were naturally drawn to the splattering blood and the behemoth of a man as the source. Byleth knew this just as well as you. You were the definition of predictable on the battlefield. 

But, the one thing you forgot was that, on a battlefield, nothing is predictable. To be able to predict the cavalier was able to reach you with his javelin was precautionary, week-one lessons, but, still, it sunk into your side. Unimaginable pain. The raw snap of impact. Warm blood cascading down your leg. Think… think! You had to get somewhere safe. Somewhere an imperial soldier wouldn’t finish you off. Hopefully, someone else would take care of that soldier before they reached you. 

Each inch was crippling. The gathering of bushes and trees seemed so far, and your energy was slipping exponentially fast. You’d be out from blood loss in due time. It even began to drip from your mouth and onto the already stained grass. Almost there. The moment your foot crossed the threshold to the hideaway, you went lip on your back. Smoke and flames met the already decaying sky. 

You glanced down your body. The javelin was at least a third in your body. Getting it out would just expedite the process, so you allowed yourself to lie your head back. Distant shouts and screams and metal clashing filled the air. The smell of the earth around you drowned out by the putrid scent of burning flesh. Something you never take note of while fighting for your life. 

Peace was not a word to use in these places, but you had no other one to use as you lied still. Is this what Dimitri meant? You wondered what he would think and say when he heard, or even saw, your death. Your death. Another nameless, pointless death in Edelgard’s ruthless path to her goal. You can see Mercedes and Annie crying. Maybe even Sylvain and Ingrid. Felix, perhaps, would cry, but you were sure he’d be pissed at you. And Dimitri… 

You sobbed. Perhaps you really were worthless, but you wanted to hope, to pray that he would be there each time you opened your eyes back to the gruel world around you. Each time, he wasn’t. 

Until he was. 

Blood dripped down his face, none of which was his own. It matted down his locks and dripped from each lock. Areadbhar glowed in his hand and dragged across the flattened grass and mud. The air was only able to jostle the very ends of his hair. His mouth opened, canines peeking from the corner of his lips. Leaving the smoke and fire behind him, Dimitri got larger and larger. 

Goddess, he was beautiful. Even as he stared with an empty eye down at you, you couldn’t help but gasp. An angel of death. You moved to rise, but the rip of his lance on your breast pushed you back down. His eye traversed down your figure to your wound. The weapon rose and fell with your breath. 

“Dimitri,” you breathed out. 

“I told you, did I not?” His chin rose and Areadbhar’s tip dug just a hair deeper. “Foolish Y/N. You are too weak for the thick of battle.” You squeezed your eyes shut. “But you will not die by imperial hands. I will not allow it. If you are to die, it will be by my hands.” Your fists gripped the grass. Dimitri hummed. “You won’t say that I wouldn’t? Or do you finally realize the truth?” 

“If you’re going to do it, just do it. Neither of us need this “ -you coughed -”stalling.” His elbow retracted and you winced, ready for the final blow.

“Y/N!” Sylvain. At the silence that followed, you peeked an eye open. Dimitri was focused on the source of the voice, giving you room to squiggle away until he forced the lance forward again. This time, the tip traced your left cheekbone. “Y/N!” Dimitri was daring you to speak, but, right now, you could hardly breath. 

“You said you were not scared of me, before. Are you scared now?” He paused. “You said you want to see what I see. Do you keep your word? Do you honor it?” Were you supposed to answer? Fear crippled your ability to formulate words. “You will not die yet.”  Areadbhar’s glow now dominated your left visual field. 

In a second, everything in that field went black, and you screamed. 

…

“I watched you go down,” Felix said. “You were at the higher ground, where you usually are in the midst of battle. You might as well have painted a target on your back if I can see you from across the plain, you idiot. That javelin went into your side,” amber eyes locked onto the bandages covering your side, “but I watched nothing touch your eye.” 

Thank the goddess for Manuela and Mercedes. Without an expertise in white magic, you would be long dead. By the same token, thank the goddess for Sylvain who found you bloody and passed out in the cover of the bushes and delivered you to them on horseback. 

Your fingers traced the bandages that wrapped around your head and covered your left eye. Everything to your left periphery and everything not covered by your right eye was black. It didn’t throb, didn’t hurt anymore, because there were no more nerves to send that pain to your brain. 

“What happened, Y/N?” Ingrid cut in. Her, Felix, and Annette stood around your bed in the medical bed. You shook your head. 

“I… I don’t remember. The last thing I recall is crawling towards the cover. I don’t even know if I got there.” 

“Liar.” Felix abruptly stood. “Stop defending that boar, and just say it.” Your mouth opened, but Ingrid cut him off. 

“Felix, are you saying you think Dimitri took her eye?” 

“I know it,” he snapped back. “I’m right, aren’t I, Y/N? Just say it. Say that beast took your eye while we were all distracted in battle.” Your eyes glanced to the others, unconsciously asking for help. 

“Felix, you’re adding unnecessary stress. Come on. We should give them space. We’re lucky they’re not dead” Her hand locked onto Felix’s arm. He grimaced, glaring down at you while he shook himself from her grip. 

“When will you ever start caring about yourself? There is more death than just physical.” He spit out before stomping out of the room. Ingrid sent you a sympathetic smile and followed her childhood friend out. Annette left soon as well under the excuse of giving you time to rest, but you could not rest. Dimitri’s face haunted you every time your working eye closed. Every throb was its own lance. Its own mark. 

His mark. 

You thought you were crazy the first time you reflected on why you and Dimitri’s eye total was the same as a normal human being. You thought you were insane for romanticizing it. It was terrifying. Inhumane. To you, at least, but to him, you knew, it was a mark of possession. That when people saw you, thought of you, it would always be connected to him, but it was also a threat. Not only to those who dare try to do you harm that isn’t him, but to you. I told you. This is what you get and will continue to get. 

You waited until the sun set, until the priests and priestesses would no longer be in your room to cry, so your pathetic cries of anguish would be bouncing off the walls in peace. Curling in on yourself, you buried your chin between your arms and stared into the dark room. Waiting and watching, a large silhouette emerged from the darkest corner and approached. Cold claws of his armor wiped away the tears on one cheek while simultaneously breaking the skin. You could only barely make him out through the moonlight in the open window next to you. Dimitri circled the bed, looking down at you from the side before bending down and planting his lips on your cheek. His warm tongue wiped at the newfound beads of blood, and you hissed at the contact. He separated himself just enough to look at the bandages around your eye. 

“I get it,” you said. “I get it.” 

…

Luckily (as lucky as you can get during the situation), the damage cut clean through the nerves, so all ganglion cells and connections to the optic nerve were completely severed. No nerves. No signal to the brain. No pain. Still, it would be a while before the tissue repaired and scabbed over. 

You didn’t know what to do with Dimitri, frankly. Part of you was terrified to even approach him. Another was equally as terrified, but this was out of what he would do if you were with someone else again. You were sure of the correlation between your broken door and your stolen eye. You wonder, then, what else he could have seen? Sparring with Felix or advice sessions with Ashe or… too many instances come to mind. 

Byleth pushed you to train more with your periphery severely impacted, and, when the time to march came, confined you to Garreg Mach until you were proficient enough not to get yourself killed. 

“Good,” was all Dimitri said on the matter. It wasn’t until your assault into the Empire that Byleth deemed you ready for actual battle. Up until then, you spent your time training. First, it was with the knights, until all of a sudden they no longer desired to raise arms with you. Something about the demon over your shoulder. You looked to Catherine, who glanced to the door, where a large shadow quickly disappeared. You inhaled sharply and pursued. 

“No one is willing to train with me. Do you have something to do with it?” 

“They can’t help you,” he responded. He quickly strode down familiar, overgrown paths down to the fields below until you both reached the same field he had trained with you in years ago. Dimitri spun around, raising his lance. “They don’t understand.” From your blindspot, he swung, and you barely dodged out of the way, feeling the very wind from the force. “Get up and arm yourself.” You quickly shuffled to your feet.

“Why? Aren’t you… don’t you plan to kill me, anyway?” 

“Equip yourself. I will not have filthy empire hands decide your demise, and I won’t have you staying behind on your own.” You gave up on trying to read into him. “Now, fight.” 

It was brutal. Unlike the helpful and cautious nature of his corrections and demands, you learned through mistakes. If your leg got slashed, you moved it the next time. If you were pushed and forced to one side, you adjusted your posture for the next time. Dimitri gave you no breaks, no time to tend to the cuts and bruises he gave you. There was hardly time to catch your breath before he was charging again, forcing your back against a nearby oak. He seemed to not be bothered or fatigued at any point. 

It would not be the first time your back was pinned against this very tree. Dimitri growled, his weapon lodged into the wood right behind your ear. A moment passed where it was five years ago, hands tight on your hips and heavy breaths swallowed by one another. Now, he pulled his weapon back and went in for another strike. 

“It’s dark. I think we need to go back.”

“You think they will not use the guise of darkness? That we will always fight when the sun is out? Arm yourself.” 

You limped back to Garreg Mach. The only real guide you had, with Dimitri’s brutal pace, was his footstep imprints and the sound of him pressing on. By the time you reached the gate, you nearly collapsed with Dimitri far ahead. Thank the goddess Anna was around to get help. Byleth’s dark cape flew behind them as they rushed through the market. They rushed you, as fast as you could go on weak legs, to the same bed you were confined to with your eye. Manuela dropped the elixir in her hand as you and your entourage busted through her door. 

“Goddess, what happened?! No matter. Get them inside.” 

Felix was going to kill you. 

But still, when you were able, you met Dimitri again in the same field. And again. And again. Until you were no longer on the verge of death each nightfall when you returned. Your former housemates did not hesitate to chastise you or even micromanage you, but, inevitably, they had to do their own work, and you set off. Felix gave you an innumerable amount of choice words before it seemed he gave up.

You were confident heading into the empire. No opponent you would face, close up or far, was Dimitri. They were far smaller, thinner, and weaker. You’d even say they seemed to have less physical intent to kill you compared to the blonde. You traded in your bandages to a white eyepatch similar to Dimitri’s except there was still padding for the raw skin underneath. Something that inevitably drew enemy forces towards you. 

“Y/N?” Despite the cruel, ruthless nature of battle, Ferdinand’s voice held the same noble gentleness. Your eye, wide and wild, met his. Across a stretch of corpses, the redhead stood tall, long hair matted down in the wind. You swallowed. “Y/N!” He called again, eyes wide behind you. In a split second, you turned to see an armored knight’s axe impending down on you. The next, a lance impaling them that breezed from over your shoulder. 

“You killed your own man.”

“He almost killed you.” You hurried to dislodge his weapon from the body.

“...Thank you,” you muttered, handing the lance back to him. Your eyes rose to behind his shoulder. “F-Ferdinand!” Your warning came too late. Dimitri’s blunt force knocked him to the ground. There was no warning, no room for words, before the sickening sound of death cracked in front of you. Again… and again… and again. You squeezed your eyes shut. 

“Keep your eyes open. This? Was your fault.” Blood splattered onto his pale features, adding to the pattern already decorating his skin. “Let’s go. Stay by me.” Not that you usually didn’t. Still, your legs would not move. Not with the fresh corpse between the two of you. “What?” Dimitri hissed out. “Are you upset? He was just another body in our way... unless it was something more to you?” You shook your head, taking a hold of your bow tighter. “Good. Let’s go.” Dimitri did not bother to even look back, and you… you could not even look down, and hurried to follow. 

You didn’t sleep for days. Ferdinand’s kind smile on your mind. You did not dare tell anyone of his gruesome demise. Though, looking at the detail, the monstrous nature of it, it didn’t take too much  thought to guess who was responsible for it. You couldn’t even bring yourself to celebrate Dedue’s return. The thing about him though was that he never let too many things go unnoticed. 

“How are you?” He simply asked, and you lost it. 

“-I couldn’t do anything. I-I couldn’t! Or… or I didn’t. Oh, goddess, I don’t know.” Your hands shook in front of you. “He can do what he will to me, but to others? Because of me? I… fuck. I couldn’t tell anyone. Felix and co. are already suspicious enough.” 

“I am sorry. I know those words do not mean much now, but, for what it is worth, I am.” He paused, furrowing his brows and focusing on the ground. “I-,”

“Y/N.” Dimitri hulked in the doorway. Where the hell does he come from? Dedue stood promptly. 

“Your Highness,” he greeted. Dimitri briefly regarded the Duscur man before focusing on you once again. 

“Come,” he said, and you followed, wishing Dedue a small farewell. Dimitri’s cape glided against the concrete. He led you across the bridge and into the empty echoes of the cathedral. It was far too late for any priests or students to linger. Especially with Dimitri lurking around in the late hours. “You still think about him.” 

“I still think about his death,” you carified. 

“Do not tell me you mourn for a man who was going to imprison you.” You scoffed. 

“He saved me.” 

“In order to take you back to the empire for information. Who else would he like to obtain than the one he grew feelings for? Do not be so naive to think he saved you so altruistically.” Your teeth dug into your bottom lip. 

“You don’t know that.” 

“I do. You and I both know how war works. Do you think Edelgard and her army would not use every former connection to get ahead? There is no line on the path to victory.  Being weak, showing compassion, is just how you get killed. How the enemy wins.” You shook your head. 

“You said you were going to kill me. Did you not save me for that reason? My death is the same no matter whose hands it is by. It will have the same impact. One less body between Edelgard and you.” Dimitri’s eye glanced downwards, then shot back up to meet yours with a small chuckle. 

“Are you not already dead? Have you not already succumbed to the wills of those who control your mind? Have you not already become your own form of monster?” You shook your head and took a step back.

“N-no, I’m not.” 

“You are not? You allow these cuts and bruises to litter your body. You allow your own eye to be stolen. You allow others to die. You allow all of this without consequence. You are a worse kind of monster: the one that allows another to live, to unleash without consequence. You hardly see the others anymore. You do not train with them, eat with them. They tend to your wounds and you run to get more.” Metal fingers gripped your chin and forced your head upwards. “I told you I would kill you, and I have.” 

HIs kiss was fire compared to the ice of his armor pushing against you. All-consuming, Dimitri’s lips molded to yours and his teeth pierced your skin. He licked at your lips, and you willingly opened your maw to let him in. You willingly allowed him to drown you out, to push you towards a pew and lock you between his body and the wood. He only separated to breath before digging for more, more. His tongue dragged across your own and touched upon your teeth, tasting your intricacies with increasing vigor. He inhaled every exhale you panted into his mouth. These were not the kisses Dimitri five years ago gifted you. 

“You taste the same…” he whispered. “Show yourself to me. Let us be dead together.” 

#yandere fe3h #yandere fire emblem #fire emblem fic #dimitri x reader #dimitri alexandre blaiddyd #yandere dimitri #yandere dimitri x reader #dimitri alexandre blaiddyd x reader #fire emblem x reader #fe16 #fe16 x reader #fe3h x reader #tw yandere #tw: yandere #tw injury #tw: injury

[iatethepomegranate]

We are not alone in the dark with our demons, Chapter 16

In which Caleb buys a house in Rexxentrum with Beau and Yasha, becomes a professor, learns to be a person separate from the trauma that shaped his life for so long, and begins the arduous process of preventing what happened to him from happening to anyone else. It gets far more personal than even he could have anticipated.

Chapter summary: Jester accidentally strikes a nerve and makes amends, and Caleb receives an unexpected message that is both welcome and frightening.

Chapter notes: Chapter title is from La Vita by Beverly Glenn-Copeland

***

Chapter 16: And the body says "Remember you gotta breathe"

Caleb and Essek finally emerged for lunch, and the Nein (minus Beau and Yasha) broke into raucous applause as they stepped into the main chamber of the Chateau. The place was empty at this time, and Essek dropped his disguise. Yeza and Luc were, mercifully, not present. But Marion was.

“I will fireball this entire building and scatter your ashes in the sea,” Caleb said mildly, dragging Essek, cheeks plum-toned with a blush, to the two remaining seats at the Nein’s table.

“That’s a very cool line, Lebby,” said Veth. “You should save it for the bad guys.”

“These assholes are good practice,” Caleb replied.

Jester leaned over the table to grab Caleb’s hand, waggling her eyebrows. “Did you have a good time? You sounded really weird on the Sending. Omigod were you guys having sex?”

Essek was incapable of retaining his composure around the Nein, and the plum tone of his usual blush was turning redder by the second. “Shut up, Jester,” he said weakly.

Caleb stepped in before this got out of hand. “All right, that’s enough. We will accept your congratulations in the form of food, if you don’t mind.”

The conversation moved on, and the colour had faded from Essek’s cheeks by the time lunch arrived. Caleb wanted to scour the shops for all the paper and ink he could find before heading back to Rexxentrum. He would need to visit Felix tomorrow, and figure out whether his parents would let him go back to school. Essek was stretching his safety a bit to stay around Caleb for a little longer, with the intention of sticking around until they found Nico. They would need to think of a more permanent solution than disguise spells eventually. So they made plans to pick up all manner of random components that were easier to source in a port city than the Empire. Just in case inspiration struck and they needed a piece of sea glass or a really cool seashell for some reason.

The seashell was Jester’s idea. She dragged Caleb to the beach to find one, just the two of them. Caleb was fairly certain there were no spells that required seashells as a component, but he generally did not say no to Jester if he could help it.

“Hey, Cay-leb.” She had been holding his hand since they left the Chateau, and she swung it as they walked among the damp sand.

Ja?”

“Fjord and Mama said I made Essek really uncomfortable at lunch.” She had an eye out for shells, scanning their surroundings, but her mouth was downturned at the corners. “I’m sorry. I was trying to be, like, funny about it? Because I think I really freaked him out this morning.”

“Ja, you caught us at an… inopportune moment.” That was putting it mildly. Caleb had worked very hard to get Essek back in the mood after that, suspecting that it would have spiralled into a long-term problem if he’d let that ruin things. “Essek is a private person. He’s coming out of his shell a bit, but it needs to be on his terms. Thank you for not trying to touch him.”

“Yeah.” Jester stepped into the shallows and plucked a shell from the sand. “Ooh, this one’s pretty.” She tucked it into her pink haversack. “Should I apologise to Essek? I don’t know if he’ll want me to.”

“He will appreciate the attempt.”

“You sound like Fjord when he doesn’t like my ideas.”

Caleb snorted. “Your ideas are wonderful, Jester, and he knows that. They can simply have… unexpected consequences. An apology sounds good. Just don’t… ask for details of what you interrupted this morning.”

“Can I ask you?” A cheeky eyebrow quirk.

“Bathtub sex,” Caleb said flatly. Because if she heard it from him, at least she wouldn’t be bursting to know anymore, and that would make this whole thing easier.

“Ooh. Very sexy.”

Caleb busied himself looking for a shell while blood flowed to his face.

“You know Fjord and I tried that once? He slipped and broke his tailbone, so I had to take very good care of him.”

Caleb sighed, and resigned himself to the fact his blush would not die down any time soon. “You are a caring person, Jester.” Caleb, personally, did not mind her teasing or oversharing; it was a sign of their friendship.

“Thank you, Caleb! You know I was bullshitting you about the seashells, right?”

“Ja, I know.”

“Help me find a weird one so I can scare Fjord later.”

***

Caleb gave Jester the space to talk to Essek upon their return, this time to Veth’s place. He set up in the kitchen/dining room to sort through what he and Essek had found at the market. Luc practiced shooting old bottles behind the house under Veth’s supervision while Yeza worked in the lab. Kingsey was watching Caleb work, asking questions about all the components he had picked up.

As Caleb sorted, he found a quiet moment to send a quick message to Beauregard to inform her of their plans. “Hallo, Beauregard. Essek and I will return home tomorrow. Is everything all right? Can I get you anything?”

Beauregard’s reply was a little delayed, stretching the limits of the spell. “Uh, yeah. We’re cool. Um, Nico snuck in when Yasha and I were out. Ate some bread, took his stuff, left a thank you note.”

Caleb dropped the pouch of pearls he had been counting. Kingsley dropped to his knees to pick them up.

“Careful, Magic Man,” he said, passing the pouch back, holding onto Caleb’s hand. He pocketed one pearl with his free hand, but Caleb couldn’t bring himself to care. “Are you good?”

Caleb took a breath. “Ja. I think so.” He cast another Sending. “How long ago? Could he still be in Rexxentrum? What did the letter say? Have you told the Soul?”

“Breathe, dude. I told Yudala. Haven’t seen the letter yet. Yasha just told me about it. This was maybe three hours ago. Can’t be far.”

Nico was either in, or close to, Rexxentrum. He’d chosen to come back. He’d taken up Caleb’s offer to go to the house. He’d eaten. He had his spellbook. His coat and shoes.

“Hey.” Kingsley was still holding his hand. “Breathe.”

“Ja, I’m getting that a lot,” Caleb said faintly. He took a breath.

Kingsley guided him to the nearest chair, pushing him into it. “Sit. I’ll find your boy.”

As he left, Caleb said, “I know you take that pearl, by the way. You need practice.”

“Yeah, fuck you, too.”

In the few minutes Kingsley was away, Caleb set the pouch of pearls on the table, put his hands on his knees, and breathed. Willed himself to stay calm. This was good news. It didn’t need to panic him. Nico wasn’t talking, but he was listening. That was a good thing.

It was also a lot of pressure, now that getting him back genuinely seemed possible. He would wait until he knew the contents of that note before he did anything. Then, depending on what the letter said, another Sending was probably in order. To let him know that he was welcome back any time.

Kingsley came back with every member of the Nein who was still in Nicodranas, which did include the one he had been looking for, just not exclusively. Essek crouched in front of Caleb, a new shell necklace swinging from his neck that must have been an apology gift from Jester.

“Are you all right?” He took both of Caleb’s hands.

Caleb managed to smile, just a little bit. “I’m fine. It was good news.”

“What happened?” asked Veth.

“Nico has been to the house, while Beau and Yasha were out. He left a note.”

Jester butted in. “What did it say? What did it say?”

“I don’t know. Beauregard could only tell me what Yasha told her. She is still at work.” Caleb’s brain was whirling, not quite clicking as neatly as he would have liked. “I… may need to leave early.”

“Or you could send Yasha a message,” said Fjord. Thank the Wildmother for his voice of reason, because Caleb was apparently incapable of thinking clearly.

“The spell only lasts a moment. If she does not have the letter in front of her…”

“I’ll tell her you’re going to message her so she can find the letter,” said Jester. “Then you message her and she reads it for you.” She was casting the spell before Caleb had a chance to reply; Fjord scrambled to count her words. “Hey, Yasha! Caleb’s gonna ask you to read the letter to him. Can you grab it now? He’s, like, kinda freaking out about it. Bye!” She listened, while Caleb gave her a look that he hoped indicated both his gratitude and also his barely-there annoyance that she used up so many words just to tell Yasha he was panicking.

Veth latched onto Caleb’s arm, pressing her cheek against his bicep. Caduceus began to heat water for tea, his go-to whenever shit went down. Caleb felt a little ridiculous for reacting so strongly to something good, to the point that all his friends were doing damage control on him.

“Okay, Caleb,” said Jester. “Yasha’s gonna grab the letter and read it to you.”

“Danke. I will give her a moment.” Caleb tugged on Essek’s hands. “Get up before your knees give out, for fuck’s sake.”

Essek floated upward, sitting criss-cross applesauce in the air so he remained only slightly above Caleb’s eye level. “Better?” he said, entirely teasing him for fixating on random trivial bullshit. Not that Caleb thought the condition of Essek’s joints was trivial. But Essek probably did.

Caleb ignored the teasing; enough time had probably passed for Yasha to find the note. “Hallo, Yasha. If the note is twenty-five words or fewer, could you please read it to me? Otherwise, give me a summary. Danke.”

Yasha wasted no words. “Dear Caleb. In brackets: Bren, question mark? Thank you for the hospitality. Sincerely, N. That’s all it says. Beau told the Soul. Not Astrid, though.”

Another spell. “Thank you, Yasha. I’ll tell Astrid. I will be home tomorrow.”

“See you!”

The spell faded away. Caleb had two more Sendings to cast, and then he could process all of this.

“Astrid, it’s Bren.” Using his old name was never comfortable, but Astrid was one of the few people he allowed that privilege. “Nico took up my offer to visit the house. He ate and took his things. Three hours ago.”

“He will not be far,” Astrid replied. “I will adjust the search orders, but you and Felix remain our best options. Enjoy Nicodranas.”

Caleb let out a long breath. “Okay, one more spell.” He cast. “Hallo, Nico. I hear you visited my home today. I will return to Rexxentrum tomorrow. You are welcome any time.” He held his breath, waiting for a response, cursing the word economy of the spell for forcing him into somewhat stilted language. He hoped it was good enough.

This time, Nico answered. “Hallo… Caleb? I’m not… I don't want to talk. But thank you.” That was it.

And that was a lot. Caleb found himself slumped in his seat, one more knot in his gut finally unravelling.

“He spoke to you?” asked Essek.

“Briefly,” Caleb said, barely getting the word out through a lump in his throat.

“That’s very good,” Caduceus said quietly, preparing herbs for the teapot. “You’re doing a good job, Caleb.”

A weak laugh. “I’m trying.”

“Keep doing what you’re doing,” said Fjord.

“We’re all very proud of you,” Veth added. Caleb dragged her into a tight hug.

***

One last evening in Nicodranas. Caleb and Essek stayed with the Brenattos again, during which time Nugget blinked in for a visit. Covered in mud.

“We’ve stopped trying to tell him where he can and can’t go,” Yeza said tiredly as Jester cheerfully hosed the dog down with her control water spell. “As long as he doesn’t destroy the neighbour’s yard again, he seems fine.”

“At least he comes back,” Caleb said. “Beauregard is still bitter about Professor Thaddeus.”

Essek sighed deeply; he had been on the receiving end of far too many rants from Beauregard, even though he himself had never met the owl. “Do not speak his name. She will reach across time and space to yell about him.”

“Who the fuck is Professor Thaddeus?” asked Kingsley.

“Beau’s asshole pet owl,” Veth explained. “He abandoned us the first time we boarded a ship, which we accidentally stole, and she curses his name to this day.”

Kingsley, who knew everything there was to know about the Nein’s bullshit at sea, simply nodded. “That tracks.”

Caleb was at risk of overthinking everything going down in Rexxentrum again, so he transformed himself into a golden retriever as soon as Nugget was clean and chased the blink dog around the Brenattos’ small back garden. And then Luc chased both of them, mercifully without his crossbow because Yeza had preemptively confiscated it.

Once all three of them were exhausted, dog-Caleb collapsed in a heap in front of the couch, resting his chin on Jester’s knee while she used one hand to give him scritches and the other hand to give Nugget scritches on her other side. Luc draped himself over Caleb’s back and fell asleep.

When Caleb turned back at the end of the hour, the boy didn’t react, so he resigned himself to lying on the floor with his now-human head in Jester lap. She kept giving him head scritches anyway.

“I wish I was watching,” Jester whispered. “This would be a very cute picture.”

Essek, smirking, hovered to sit in front of the four of them, and produced an illusion replicating what he saw. Caleb hid his face in Jester’s skirt instead of looking at himself, because he would want to kiss Essek if he examined the way the man looked at him. And he was trapped by obligation beneath a sleeping child. You did not move for sleeping animals or children (or Beauregards), unless you absolutely had no choice (or Mollymauk dragged you away to examine magic shit, but that was covered under the no choice category).

“Aw, are you shy, Caleb?” Jester said. “Could someone get my--oh, thanks, Fjord.” A soft scratching of pencil on paper.

“Would you do me a favour, Jester?” asked Essek.

Caleb laughed against the fabric of Jester’s skirt; he was already doing her a favour with the illusion.

“I’ll do you all the favours, Essek! What do you need?”

“Could I have a copy of that, when you’re finished?”

“Of course! I’ll hide some extra dicks in yours.”

Essek sighed. “Thank you, Jester.”

Caleb fell asleep for a time. He woke up on the couch with a blanket and Nugget draped over him. The smell of something cooking was in the air; the spices were somewhat familiar but he couldn’t quite place them. Probably something local. He listened to the clattering of the kitchen for a while, sleepily scratching Nugget’s head, until he finally found the energy to open his eyes. He was dimly aware there were others in the room, but Essek drew his attention. And held it.

Essek hovered by the arm of the couch closest to Caleb’s head, making notes in one of his old Aeor field journals. Caleb let nostalgia wash over him; he remembered that book. It was one of the last before they had finally ended their weeks-long expedition and turned to face the rest of the world and all its complicated bullshit. Caleb had been popping in and out with risk teleports for supplies and Trent’s trial (and turning down the job offer from Ludinus). Getting away from it all and unravelling secrets with Essek had kept him sane through all of it.

It had taken them a while to speak plainly about their feelings for each other. Longer than the rest of the Nein probably knew. But, ultimately, the main difference before and after Aeor was the amount of physical touch they shared, and occasionally its nature. But only occasionally.

And some of those changes had happened before they spoke of it.

Essek, not looking up from the book, reached out to lay his arm on the couch, fingers barely making contact with Caleb’s hair. He lifted the book into the air and let it hover, continuing to make notes. Caleb knew enough about Essek’s floating cantrip at this point to know he could float and cast a concentration spell at the same time, at least when he wasn’t under duress. And Caleb still found that very cool. Or maybe Essek was just extending his floating cantrip to the book. Still cool, either way.

Jester was cackling softly, drawing his attention. She had her sketchbook out again and kept shooting glances in their direction with a cheeky raised eyebrow. Caleb, trapped beneath a sleeping dog, resigned himself to his fate as Jester’s model once again. She and the rest of the Nein were coming to Rexxentrum shortly for his speech (oh fuck he had a speech in mere days at the Academy), so there would be ample opportunity for her to get this out of her system.

Oh, who was he kidding? Jester would never get this out of her system and that was one of many reasons he loved her. And maybe he would pull her aside later and ask for copies of her sketches as well. Essek would have to leave eventually, and it would be nice to have something to look at in his absence. Even if Caleb’s memory was good enough to keep an image in his mind, he liked having tangible things to remember his loved ones by.

The loss of the letters still ached sometimes, even if he had needed to let them go. The quilt the Nein had bought for him helped when he was at home. Maybe he could collect happier memories now. Yasha used to press flowers in a book for Zuala, and he had a bare spot in his book holsters now. Both of them could use some happier momentos. Caleb had purchased a pair of nice leather-bound journals from a bookstore earlier today; maybe he would give one to Yasha and see what she did with it. It would feel less weird than doing this alone. And Yasha would understand the need for it.

At some point during Caleb’s mind journey, Essek had begun to stroke his hair. Caleb closed his eyes and tried to stay in the moment. Treasure it. He buried his fingers in Nugget’s fur. The dog huffed in his sleep.

Kingsley had evidently started watching Jester draw at some point and whispered advice for where she could hide dicks in the drawing. Fjord sighed but didn’t stop him. Caleb couldn’t hear Caduceus, Veth, Luc or Yeza in the immediate vicinity. Caduceus was probably helping with dinner, and maybe Luc had been tucked into bed upstairs. Or was off playing outside again.

A louder clatter of plates caught Nugget’s attention and he blinked away, earning startled yells from Veth and Caduceus in the kitchen. Caleb sat up and stretched. His spine cracked a bit; he was getting too old to sleep on floors and couches comfortably. He dug his thumbs into the back of his neck, working the stiffness out of the muscle.

“You get that too, huh?” said Fjord. Numerically, Fjord was a few years younger than him at most, and half-orcs aged a little quicker than humans. Functionally, they were probably close to the same age. It was hard to tell, given Fjord had started to go a bit grey on account of seeing some serious shit.

Caleb grumbled a bit, the edges of sleep clinging to his consciousness enough that he was still a bit cranky. “Sometimes I forget I’m thirty-fucking-four.”

“Don’t you remember everything?” asked Kingsley.

“Ah.” He chuckled ruefully. “Not quite.” He did not bring up the fact he had only spent twenty-three of his years with the expected level of awareness for his age (more awareness, actually, in the case of his toddlerhood). Eleven years of little-to-no memory continued to fuck with his head, even years after the fact.

Even without saying it, he had managed to bring down the mood of the room. He was good at that. Jester had even stopped sketching. She had lost five years of her own, but at least she knew where they had gone. Not that Caleb would ever say that to her; it would sound crueller than he meant. And he knew she wasn’t sombre for her own sake, but for his, because she knew why Caleb was missing eleven years. And she was the kind of loving person who would freak out when she found out stepping on grass hurt it (because she had found that out). Even Kingsley caught the drop in the mood; Caleb wasn’t sure exactly how much he knew of Caleb’s experiences, but he did know bits and pieces. Which bits and pieces, however, was unclear.

Then Fjord stretched his arms upwards, a dull crack in his shoulders. “There we go. Can’t let you have all the fun, Caleb.”

Essek grimaced. “Agh, will you two stop that?”

Jester laughed, a little wetter than Caleb would have liked. “We should start a grumpy old people club. Essek isn’t invited because he’s, like, a toddler in elf years.”

“I beg your pardon!”

“He will sulk if we keep him out,” said Caleb. “Very childish behaviour, I know, but you know the fair folk are basically children until they’re five hundred.”

“Please! I am most definitely an adult.”

“Barely.”

Essek scowled at him, because Caleb was technically right. Essek had been an adult for about twenty years. For an elf? That was barely anything.

“And Jester, I’m sorry, but you are not eligible either. You are neither old nor grumpy.”

“But I gave away five years!”

“I lost eleven and have moderate joint pain,” Caleb replied mildly. “I even found a grey hair the other day.”

“Ooh, where was it?” Jester set her sketchbook aside, propping her chin up on hands braced on her knees. “In your dick hair?” Fjord coughed suspiciously like he had found his own fair share of grey hairs in that region himself.

“Ja, actually. Not where I had expected to find one, but here we are.” It wasn’t Caleb’s first grey hair; he’d found a few here and there before. But that one had been rather memorable.

Kingsley’s tail swished around the way it did when he was thinking something probably not appropriate for polite company. “Oh? How’d you find it?”

Essek sighed and opened his field journal. He was awful at lying to friends. Made sense, since he’d never needed that skill until a few months ago.

“Oh, Essek found it,” Caleb said, because the game was up anyway.

Kingsley smirked. “I thought so.” He didn’t push further; Kingsley was actually quite good at poking boundaries without breaking them. Most of the time. By now, he knew Caleb was very open to teasing of a sexual nature while Essek’s threshold was much lower. Jester, still chastened after whatever Fjord and her mother had said to her about making Essek uncomfortable, snickered a bit but said something.

Caduceus emerged to gather everyone for dinner.

#shadowgast #caleb widogast #essek thelyss #critical role #cr2 #fanfiction #my fics #the pomegranate's professor widogast fic

[allmygyus]

＊*✩Unrequited Love✩*˚＊

Trust (23/?)

[ prev : masterlist : next ]

⇢wordcount: 1,267 ⇢warnings: none that im aware of :<

After the podcast was finished, Jihoon, Seungkwan, Hansol, and Dino made their way to their dorms whereas you and Seungcheol were left standing outside the studio.

“So,” he put his hands in his pockets, “where are you headed off to?”

“Actually, I’m about to head to the practice room and practice,” you say while picking up your canvas bag and sliding it on your shoulder.

“Here,” Seungcheol said as he took the bag from you and slung it on his shoulder instead. “I’ll walk you there.”

He smiled at you and you nodded in reply. The two of you made your way to the building where the practice room was located. It was pretty serene in the campus since most students already went home and the ones residing in the campus were either studying at the library or just quietly hanging out with their friends.

“So,” he breathed out, “you’re positive that you and Mingyu aren’t in a relationship right?”

“Ye- yes. Of course! Were just- just best friends. Yeah.” you answered and laughed nervously. Talking about Mingyu with other people always made you nervous because of the feelings you had for him. You didn’t want anyone to find out that you were actually crushing on your best friend. 

“Hey,” he chuckled and changed the topic to make you feel more at ease, “why are you so nervous? If its because of that drunken hug at Junhui’s party. Don’t worry, it’s all good.”

“Oh my god,” you exclaim and the heat rushes to your body. You totally forgot about what you had done that night and how embarrassing it was. “I was so drunk that night. I’m really sorry Cheol.” You’ve never wanted to smack yourself in the face so badly.

“Y/n,” he laughs at your reaction. “I told you it’s fine. I just wanted to skip the Mingyu talk because it made you so nervous.” He looked at you fondly and while you still continued to walk and yank your hair down while repeatedly calling yourself stupid in your head.

“You know,” he said, “you give the best hugs.”

“Really?” you answer and look at him before returning your vision to the walkway. “Well, thats good to know at least.”

He smiled and nodded. “You’re a good President,” you say. “because, even though I am technically your under, you never make me feel that way. I kinda feel like we’re friends working together rather than being a PA.”

“That’s good to know Y/n,” he replied and felt a little flutter in his stomach. “And to me, we are friends working together.” he laughed and nudged you. “So loosen up around me, don’t be so professional all the time.”

“Noted,” you smile and felt more comfortable around him. The two of you stop as you face the doors of the practice room.

“Well,” he said while taking off your bag, “here is your bag. I should probably go now.”

“Thanks for walking with me,” you take the bag and smile at him.

“Where is she? Its-,” Soonyoung frantically bursts out of the door, scaring both you and Seungcheol, to first see you. He greets you warmly with a smile.

“Oh there you are!” he cheered. The smile on his face suddenly disappeared when he saw the person next to you. Seungcheol. Soonyoung was taken back because he didn’t expect to see the two of you together at this hour. He felt a bit of jealousy, even, seeing the two of you so close. 

“Hey Soonyoung,” Seungcheol nervously waves.

“Hi Cheol,” Soonyoung nods with a straight face. It was awkward now knowing the history between them. You were now very aware of their feelings towards each other and the friendship they used to share.

“Y/n, I’ll wait for you inside,” he says coldly and walks back into the practice room. You face Seungcheol and apologize on behalf of Soonyoung’s hostility.

“It’s okay,” he nervously scratches the back of his neck. “Honestly, I would react the same if I were in his shoes. No worries! I’ll head to my dorm now.”

“Okay,” you say as he starts walking away. “Head home safely!” You wave and he waves in return. You make your way into the practice room and greet Soonyoung.

“Hey,” you drop your bags to the floor and walk over to him. “Sorry I was a little late. The podcast ended-“

“You know,” he interrupted. “I know you’re his PA and you have to follow him around and help with student council things but just a warning. He’s not the person you think he is.”

Soonyoung spoke with his back toward you, both arms resting on the table and his eyes on the computer looking for the song that you chose to dance to. There was a fair amount of space between you guys and the tension was high.

Soonyoung wasn’t sure if he was reacting this way because seeing Seungcheol always hurt him. It reminded him of the betrayal he felt and the sadness of losing a friend. But now, seeing him with you somehow angered him. It was an unfamiliar feeling and it frustrated him.

“Don’t trust him too easily Y/n.”

You didn’t really know how to react because it was your first time seeing Soonyoung react this way. He wasn’t one to get angry often. He was just always smiling and playful and you didn’t know how to approach him because it frightened you to see someone who was always loud and happy to be so quiet and cold.

“Hey,” you quietly walked towards him while he continues to scroll on the laptop with his eyebrows furrowed. As the space between you lessened the pace of your heart hurried. Maybe it was because you were a bit scared of this version of Soonyoung or maybe it was something else. You wrap your arms around his waist. His body tensed up but relaxed shortly after. You rest your head on his shoulder and hoped that your best friend wouldn’t push you away.

“He told me,” you whispered and he turned around to face you, releasing from the hug. “About what happened to you guys.”

“Oh,” he frowned again.

“I’m sorry that happened to the two of you,” you rub his arm and reassure him that Seungcheol feels bad about how their friendship ended. Soonyoung pulls you into another hug and you embrace him, hoping that the negative emotions would just wash away from his mind.

“Thanks Y/n,” the both of you release each other from the embrace. You pat him on the shoulder and say “Now, stop sulking. You still have me, Seokmin and Mingyu.”

“I know,” he smiles and stares at you for a while and you stare at him with a smile in reply. The two of you stood there for a while and before the proximity could lessen any more, the music blasted through the speaker and caused both of you to jump and separate from each other’s grasp.

“Welp,” Soonyoung put his hands on his waist and clapped his hands once. “That’s probably a sign that we should start practicing.” He chuckled nervously and started the music, trying to ignore what had just happened.

You follow him and start dancing but the moment you two had was still replaying in your mind. You couldn’t ignore the fact that your heart was beating so fast and how close he was getting or how you even closed your eyes before the music came on. Now you were even more confused. Were you really catching feelings for two of your best friends?

Summary: ⤑ Soonyoung, Mingyu, Seokmin and y/n. It’s always been the four of them and y/n wouldn’t have it any other way. Y/n loved the three of them but she loved one differently. It’s their third year of college and y/n’s been debating whether she would tell the one she loved how she truly felt but would it be worth risking their friendship over? Along the way she struggles to realize what it is she truly wants.

Pairing: ⤑college student y/n x ??

taglist: @sunshineshouchan​ @dy-mglzz​ @suhfluffy​ @muhanuibean​ @itsdnguyenxoxo​ @unmanageable-day​ @ash-moon8 @444wjh

#seventeen #seventeen social media au #seventeen smau #seventeen au

[dumb-little-trans-writer]

Rust and Black Thorn Trees. Chapter 2.

The girl tiredly wandered, getting increasingly exhausted.

She didn’t know where she was.

She knew nothing.

What Miranda neglected to focus on, however, was the fact that she also transformed when on the brink of death, to attempt to find something, anything, to eat, or to wear.

She saw a pack of lycans.

She silently transformed, as how Mother taught her.

Or, more accurately, beat into her.

She stalked the lycans for the perfect moment.

They grabbed bunnies as though they were chips, the high-pitched screaming echoing through her ears.

As one of the lycans had a rabbits leg in it’s mouth, Dasha struck the lycan closest to her, slashing it’s throat. She quickly moved from lycan to lycan before they could react.

As she transformed back, she immediately started tearing the flesh from the lycans with her teeth. She found that eating right after transforming prevents the nausea and the puking, it doesn’t prevent the leaking of the liquid from her eyes and nose, though.

She binged, knowing that this may be her last meal for a while.

She could smell winter on the horizon, and this was her life for the next six years.

Over these six gruesome years, she was able to find the occasional lost tourist or hunter in the forests surrounding Heisenberg’s Factory.

She stole their weapons, and their clothing.

She found that she preferred men’s clothing.

The girl would transform less and less, using the limited ammo and resources she had.

Karl Heisenberg watched her last hunt, as it was the closest to the factory she’d ever been.

Risky.

Hmm, he thought as he watched her dance with the lycans.

With a shotgun shell to the face, of course.

“Hey, you know, there isn’t anyone who can sell you ammo around here,” Heisenberg said, walking toward the girl. She jumped, cautious, “if you run out, you’re kinda fucked.” he stated, putting out his cigar.

She had heard of Lord Heisenberg. Never met him though.

“What are you implying?” she spat.

“All i’m saying is that running out of shotgun shells during the wintertime, when it’s nearly below zero, can be deadly,” he paused, spitting on the cold leaves, “especially for someone as tiny as you.” he laughed at her glare.

“Don’t call me tiny.” she replied, walking past him.

In the recesses of her mind, she was okay with it.

Heisenberg led Dasha to his factory.

It was loud.

The metal clanging against itself, the periodic releases of steam, and the...chainsaw revving?

Heisenberg opened a hatch, and screamed “SHUT YOUR HOLE, ROTTEN CUNT.”

The revving stopped.

“Is one of your failed experiments down there, Karl?” she teased, taking off her jacket as the humidity made it extremely warm, and uncomfortably sweaty. It revealed how muscular she had grown. She was still slim, but a little buffer from when she was with Her.

He seemed taken aback by her calling him Karl, instead of Lord, or even just his last name.

He liked that she didn’t pay his status any mind, he knows he didn’t give a fuck.

“Maybe. I’ll throw you down there if you decide to say some shit.” Heisenberg said with a slight growl.

“I could take it, i bet.” she purred.

“Don’t tempt me, bitch.” Heisenberg whispered, emphasizing ‘bitch’

The girl lightly skipped down the hallway, amusing Heisenberg.

“If I didn'thave a spare room I'd make you sleep outside.” Heisenberg called. She turned and nodded, “It’s right over here.” he pointed to a door on the side of another hallway. The room they were currently in had the bare necessities, albeit it was a mess.

She really didn’t mind though.

She walked to the room he was talking about, and opened the door to a bed that seemed to be collecting dust.

In fact, everything seemed to be barely touched.

Despite her past with cleaning, she needed to at least dust everything down.

“You got something i can wipe this shit down with? Looks like a tomb in here.” she yelled.

“Yeah, gimme a sec, christ” Heisenberg seemed to be struggling with something. She left the room, confused, and then amused at the sight before her.

He seemed to be trying to fix his oven, or cleaning it, whatever he was doing, he was struggling with it.

“Pfft, need help?” she asked, smirking.

“I’d rather kill myself than get help from you.” he coldly replied, sighing as he took his head out of the oven. His face was slightly stained with ash, and he was sweating. She leaned up again the counter, looking at him with an eyebrow raised. Now that she had a closer look, he seemed to be cleaning to oven judging by the ash stained rag soaked in water he was holding.

“This isn’t how you do it, let me help you.” she demanded. Heisenberg was slightly surprised by this, but silently swallowed a bite of his pride, and stood up, arms crossed.

“So how do YOU do it?” Heisenberg asked in a condescending tone.

“You got baking soda?” she suddenly asked, “’cause we’re gonna need a decent amount.” she added, taking out the oven racks.

“I have a lot of it, i guess.” Heisenberg replied, slightly confused.

“Do you realize how much of a fire hazard this is? I might scrub your entire fucking house down at this rate.” Dasha exclaimed, “where’s the baking soda?”

“There.” he pointed to a cabinet. She opened it and grabbed the tin, holding it for a moment to see if she’d need another one.

“Vinegar?” she asked.

“In the same cabinet.” Heisenberg said, annoyed and impatient.

“This is gonna take a day, I hope you know.” Dasha laughed.

“Fucking WHAT?” Heisenberg asked, shocked.

“Yeah. I have to-”

“I DON’T EVEN KNOW YOUR NAME AND YOU’RE CLEANING MY OVEN.” Heisenberg said, frustrated.

“...Do you wanna know my name?” she asked, pouring baking soda and water into a cup, “or how to clean your own fuckin’ oven?” she said, sarcastically.

“Both’s fine I guess.” Heisenberg rolled his eyes.

“Dasha Jelíneková. That’s my name.”

“Dein Name ist schön...” Heisenberg muttered.

“...what?” Dasha asked, confused.

“Nothin’. Explain why it’s gonna take a day.” he quickly changed topics.

“Well, wiping down the interior with a soaked rag might get some of the grime off, but it won’t get it all off,” she paused as she mixed more baking soda in with the water to make a paste, “deep cleaning your oven like this also helps heat disperse evenly.” she explained.

“Seriously..?” he muttered, thinking about how his last meal was damn-near raw in some spots, and burnt in others.

“So, you take baking soda and water, make a paste with it like this,” she stuck the cup in his face, “you got rubber gloves, right?” she asked.

“Take a fuckin’ guess.” Heisenberg laughed at the question.

“Hand ‘em to me, dickhead.” she said, making a poor attempt to hide a smile.

“By the way, dunno if this has anythin’ to do with you, but i’ve been finding pretty large lycan carcasses that are either brutally killed and then eaten, or seemingly killed in self defense, all of ‘em had gnarly claw marks,” he paused, “know anything about that?” He asked. Her blood ran cold, but she tried to keep her composure. 

“Maybe it was a mutated Lycan.” she quietly said, applying the paste to every crevice in the oven. Heisenberg was confused as to why she was acting strange, and more importantly, how she knew the Lycans were caused by...that.

“Well, uh, keep an eye out, yanno?” Heisenberg uncomfortably laughed in the awkward silence.

“Can you plug the sink, and pour some baking soda on ‘em? Then pour the vinegar on ‘em.”

“Okay...what now?” Heisenberg asked.

“Wait for it to stop foaming, and stick em under the water. In the sink, i mean.” she explained, finishing applying the last of the paste.

“Okay...” he muttered.

“Now, we wait for at least ten hours.”

“...Are you serious?” Heisenberg asked, seemingly shocked.

“Why wouldn’t i be?” she replied, confused.

He looked down, “That doesn’t seem reasonable-”

“You don’t seem to be either, Mister Heisenberg.” she smirked at him.

“You know...” he started, “You should be happy I haven’t chucked you down that chute.” he threatened, towering over her small frame with a hand in her hair, mimicking a ponytail, pulling her close to him. He outwardly smelled like cigar smoke, gasoline, and sweat. His breath reeked of whiskey, his hot breath on her cheek. But she smelled more than just that, due to the experimentation with the Cadou.

She could smell what people feel, she always sort of could, but this was heightened by the experimentation.

This was new, it smelled like a heavy, rich devil’s food cake.

It smelled like sin.

She glanced downward at his crotch, and he was definitely pitching a tent.

“You really don’t want this, Karl.” she whispered. It was true, at least in her mind.

No one should want a monster.

She didn’t even know what she wanted, outside of Her dead.

Staring directly into his eyes, she gently placed her hand on the hand he was using to grip her hair. He violently let go, glaring and walking outside.

He hated how similar, yet different they both were. He wanted her to stay with him, despite barely knowing eachother.

It was a bag of mixed emotions.

Dasha followed behind, she found Heisenberg collecting firewood.

“I’m makin’ hotdogs.” he stated.

“On a fire, I’m assuming?” she asked, “i had to learn how to make a fire by myself. Got good at it too.” she bragged.

Heisenberg ignored her comment, “Can you get the ‘dogs and the buns for me outta the fridge?”

“Sure, what rack are they on?” she asked.

“Figure it out.” he coldly replied.

She scoffed, and went back inside, muttering to herself.

Heisenberg thought for a while while she was inside.

Why did she know about the Cadou? Why does she live in the forest? Is it by choice? I wonder if she’s useful...I wonder if Miranda- he thought. He zoned out, and realized his hands were dangerously close to the fire. He nonchalantly pulled them away, added a little more wood, and grabbed a chair. He thought for a moment, and pulled another chair over from the wood pile.

She came back, hot dog buns and hot dogs in tow.

Heisenberg used his powers to make two metal sticks come to him.

“What the fuck.” she whispered, taken aback.

“Oh. Here.” he said, handing one to Dasha.

“No, what the fuck was that-?” Dasha nervously laughed.

“Oh, yeah. I can do that. Only metal though.” Heisenberg explained.

“Huh.” she replied, giving a bun and a hot dog to him. He stuck the tapered metal point through the middle of the hot dog, and stuck it over the fire.

Dasha did the same.

They sat in uncomfortable silence for what felt like a hour, but really was five minutes.

Heisenberg, obviously, was the first to break the silence.

“So I know you’ve never really mentioned it, but I’m thinkin’ you LIVE in the forest, right?” Heisenberg asked.

“Yeah. Why?” she asked, holding the hot dog above the fire.

“Just haven’t really seen anyone willingly live in the forest.” Heisenberg shrugged. There was another period of silence between them as the fire popped and crackled.

“Do you live in the forest willingly?” Heisenberg asked, taking his hot dog off the metal stick, placing it into the bun.

She looked at him, and opened her mouth to speak, but couldn’t find the words to describe her situation. She blinked a couple times, trying to find the words.

“I don’t know.” she furrowed her brow, and had an unmistakable look of i’m-remembering-things-i-don’t-want-to-think-about. Heisenberg wasn’t amazing with emotions, despite being able to read someone like a book.

“Sorry.” he quietly said, looking away from her.

“You had no way of knowing. It’s fine.” She leaned towards him. Then, she took her hot dog away from the fire, and just ate it off the stick. This sight amused Heisenberg.

“How long have you lived in the forest?” Heisenberg asked with his mouth full.

“Around six years? Hard to keep track.” she said, after swallowing a bite.

“Damn. So how old are you now?”

“I don’t know, around twenty-three, i think?” she replied.

“That checks out.” Heisenberg smugly joked.

“At least I don’t look like I’m from World War II.” she retorted, laughing.

“And what if I am, huh?” Heisenberg joked, knowing he was in fact born around when WWII ended.

“I was kidding, shut the fuck up.” she laughed. Heisenberg realized that he really, really liked her laugh. Maybe it’s from the isolation in the factory, and now he finally has someone that seems to enjoy his company. This feeling scared him, just a little bit.

“Yeah, sure.” he laughed. There was silence again.

“This might be coming out of nowhere, but could you...refer to me as a boy? I know this is strange coming from someone who looks like me, but-” he got cut off.

“I get it, it’s alright. No worries. You got a new name?” he asked.

“Dimitri.”

“Still a pretty name.” Heisenberg muttered.

“I heard that.” Dimitri laughed.

“Oh.”

The both of them finished their hot dogs, and they went inside. It was getting cold.

“Starting tomorrow, you’re gonna help me around the factory. Otherwise I won’t hesitate to throw you out.” Heisenberg threatened.

“Alright, you’re gonna have to show me how it works around here though, depending on my job.” he replied, taking his jacket off. He got into his room and rummaged through his bag, looking for a tank top or something. He found a black one that he looted off of a tourist, and swapped into it. Even when it was freezing outside, it was mildly uncomfortable to wear a sweater like he was. He didn’t even think about his immense number of scars being visible, from various creatures and pitiful self-defense attempts. One benefit from the Cadou was that it gave him a healing factor. The only downside, in his eyes, was that killing himself was impossible. He walked out of the room, and into the living room. Heisenberg was making multiple small metal parts like gears and screws float in a certain fashion, making outlines of various things.

He sat on the couch that looked as though it was about to fall apart.

“You’re almost as scarred up as me,” Karl laughed as he pulled up his shirt, revealing a multitude of scar marks, and a happy trail.

Fuck, okay maybe I do know what I want... he thought. He felt a small tingling around his cheeks, as he laughed. He turned around and pulled up the back of his shirt to reveal some of the worst scars he’s gotten. Heisenberg felt himself tense up, his cheeks went red too.

“Can i..?” he asked as he reached his hand out halfway.

“Touch them? Sure.” Dimitri replied, scooting backwards.

He felt his calloused hands gently trace over all of his scars, even the smaller ones. Despite Karl’s rough and mean demeanor, he was so gentle. His hand gently ran down to his waist. He was surprised, but it was calming.

Karl pulled away, fearful of being intimate with him. He had just met the guy, why did he feel this pull?

“I was okay with that, you know.” he said, facing him and letting his shirt fall back to it’s place. He moved a bit closer, wanting the closeness of someone that he never had. “...Please?”

Heisenberg was confused. He was reluctant because of trust issues, yet Dimitri was the polar opposite?

Why did he come here..?

I wanted to use him as an experiment, why-?

“No.” he stated, “I can’t.”

He wordlessly left, Dimitri assuming into his room.

He sighed, and left into 'his' room too.

"Shit." he muttered, thinking about how bad that was. Dimitri went to sleep, trying to forget the entire damn day.

#karl heisenberg #daddy heisenberg #resident evil #resident evil village #fanfic #heisenberg x oc

[bastardtetsu]

{day 13} falling slowly | semi x reader

pairing: semi eita x gn!musician!reader

genre: angst, mutual pining or unrequited love depending on how you look at it

wc: 1.8k

warnings: a little swearing, reader who plays piano/sings, mention of a previous relationship, unresolved feelings, just a lot of pain

⍋⋆*❅｡. 25 days of fic-mas mlist .｡❅*⋆⍋

falling slowly eyes that know me and i can’t go back

—falling slowly; once (music & lyrics by glen hansard & marketa irglova, book by enda walsh)

“that song you just played— did you write that?”

you stood there, wide-eyed, staring him down as he turned to walk away from the spot where he had just been busking on the sidewalk. semi wanted to ignore you, but your resolute gaze already had a vice grip on him.

“yeah,” he grunted reluctantly.

“it’s very good.”

“thanks.”

despite his gruffness, you were still staring at him like your life depended on it. it was kinda unnerving.

“why’d you leave your guitar?” you questioned him with a sense of urgency, gesturing to the guitar semi had left in its case on the sidewalk. his expression hardened.

“i don’t want it anymore,” he muttered, casting his eyes downward.

“you should take it. those things are expensive, you know.”

“fine,” he grumbled, shooting you a glare as he stooped to grab the case by the handle, “i’ll sell it if it makes you feel better.”

“i know a shop!” you blurted out, “a music shop. where you can sell your guitar. i was just on my way there, actually!”

“…seriously?”

“it must be fate!”

those words made him cringe back then.

as the two of you entered the store, a cozy place packed with various instruments, you wasted no time making a beeline for the back of the store, dragging a confused semi along with you.

“where are we going? i thought we were here to sell my guitar,” he questioned.

“just follow me,” you insist. the determination in your voice told him there was no point in resisting.

you continued leading him through the shop, all the way to an old upright piano that sat towards the back. “the owner lets me play this whenever i come in,” you explained, your merciless gaze now fixed on the instrument, “it’s a beautiful piano. if i ever win the lottery, this is the first thing i’m buying.”

semi just watched you quietly as you stood there, marveling at it. he was able to appreciate the intensity of your stare more now that he wasn’t the subject of it - the way your eyes glimmered was actually kind of entrancing.

“so what would you like to hear?” you questioned, suddenly turning your gaze back on him as you sat yourself on the bench, “bach? mozart? something of my own?”

“oh, uh— whatever you want,” he muttered. there was clearly no use stopping you at this point, so he might as well comply.

you positioned yourself and began playing. it was a somber melody, gentle but distinctly melancholic. your concentration remained unbroken as your fingers danced gracefully across the keys, until the final mournful note echoed through the empty store.

“did you write that?” semi asked, a bit awestruck by your talent.

“no. felix mendelssohn did.”

“ah.”

“now you play me one,” you demand, eyes aglow.

“wh—no,” semi faltered.

“please,” you begged.

“no,” he stated firmly, his expression hardening again, “i just came here to get rid of my guitar.”

“what do you mean?” you protested, “your music is good, why are you giving up on it?” semi cringed at the sting of your question.

“there’s no point anymore,” he snapped, “it’s gotten me nowhere.”

“what, so you’re quitting ‘cause you’re not famous?”

“i’m not—“ he scoffed defensively, “you wanna play your songs for people who want to listen.”

“well i’m people,” you stated, your gaze on him more unyielding than ever, “and i want to listen. now play me a song.”

the rigidity of your stare was almost enough to convince him.

“no.”

however, just as semi turned to leave, as if by some sort of drama-induced miracle, a sheet of folded paper fell from his coat pocket, which you wasted no time snatching up before he could even grab at it.

“hey—“ he protested, “give it back, come on.”

“music is dead to you, right?” you taunted, “so isn’t this trash?”

“you know what,” he huffed, his patience at its limit, “fuck it—yeah, keep it. it was nice meeting you.”

“hey!” you barked right as he was turning to leave. his head spun around to find your eyes staring him down with the most intensity and desperation he’d seen from you all day. “you won’t die if you play this song with me,” you spoke to him sincerely, “please.”

he didn’t answer, but remained frozen where he stood, unwilling to break from your acute gaze as you lowered yourself onto the bench and placed your fingers on the keys.

you perused the slightly crumpled page while semi waited with nervous anticipation, reminding himself to breathe as you began to play the notes he had scrawled onto the staff.

as your fingers began to recreate the familiar motif with impressive precision, he gingerly picked up his guitar from its case by the piano, looping the strap over his head as he started to sing,

“i don’t know you but i want you all the more for that”

he sang tentatively at first, the words and notes like scratches upon an unhealed scab, until your voiced chimed in with a harmony,

“and words fall through me and always fool me and i can’t react”

semi began to strum at his guitar, more self-assured as the gentle tune continued, your voices and instruments moulding together as the music swelled into chorus after chorus. his reluctant voice became more and more powerful with each changing chord, each strum of his guitar more intentional as the sounds intermingled with yours, creating new discoveries within a painfully familiar refrain.

as the tempo slowed to a quiet halt, your eyes met with his again until you played the final chord in unison. you both stood there in silence for a moment, as if you were waiting for the final sound waves to finish reverberating, dissolving into the air.

“so where is she?” your question broke the silence.

“where’s who?”

“the girl in the song,” you clarified, “is she dead??”

“what—no, jesus,” semi sputtered, caught off guard for what must be the 75th time today.

“so where is she?” your gaze is on him again, adamant as ever.

“she left,” he uttered, his dejection covered by his brusque tone, “about six months ago. there was nothing else for her here, so—”

“so you still love her?”

semi’s face twitched, feeling his chest tighten at the question.

“no. we’re finished,” he stated shortly.

“no one who writes a song like that is finished,” you enunciated firmly, causing his breath to catch. “if you sing this to her, i bet she’ll take you back.”

“huh?” the ash blond’s face twisted into a confused scowl.

“i’m serious.” the gleam in your eye only affirmed your statement.

“no way,” he replied, “i’m not running after some woman who’s doing fine without me just so i can sing her some stupid—“

“it’s not stupid!” you nearly yelled at him before softening a bit, maintaining your resolute stare. “your songs are good,” you stated emphatically. semi felt his breath catch again, this time accompanied by a rush of warmth to his face. “do you have more??”

-

your heart nearly stops when you see it, breath catching in your throat as the sting of tears begins to prick your eyes.

the old upright piano you had spotted one day in a music store now sits in your living room, a large, bright red ribbon adorning its shiny wooden surface. there is no note, but you need no indication to know who it’s from.

he must be long gone now. he got a call from his ex practically begging him to come back, so of course he went. it doesn’t matter how many longing glances you caught as you helped him rehearse, or how much electricity you felt surge through your body every time you so much as brushed his hand while reaching for some sheet music.

he has unfinished business. you’ve both always known that, it’s why you tried so hard to keep your distance, even as you helped him produce a studio album, relentlessly encouraging him not only to keep pursuing music, but to keep pursuing her. it’s what he deserves. it’s not your place.

it doesn’t matter how much your heart wanted to leap out of your chest when his stern grey eyes stared into yours, uncharacteristically earnest, as he squeezed your hands in his and thanked you for changing his life. he was talking about the music. you’ve only ever talked about the music.

it doesn’t matter that no matter how hard you tried to maintain your distance - god, you really tried - his songs always pulled you back in. those songs aren’t about you. he wrote those for someone else, someone who he is destined to go back to.

it doesn’t matter that every time he played one he felt a shift, like discovering a new harmony, each lyric twisting into a different meaning. that somewhere along the way, he started singing them about you — you can’t think about that. it can’t be about that.

it doesn’t even matter that he said you were a part of his new life, starry-eyed and nearly breathless, imploring you with to run away with him and start a band together, make an album, just the two of you and all your beautiful music. it was just a silly fantasy. one can only entertain such a delusion for so long before you have to move on with your real life again.

as you lower yourself onto the piano bench, you imagine yourself back in the shop on that day, the ash-blonde musician you had just met scowling dubiously as you began to play the opening of one of his songs. you can almost hear the delicate strains of his guitar as he plucked the accompaniment on the strings, his voice growing stronger as he sang.

“and games that never amount to more than they’re meant will play themselves out”

you recall sitting with him at the top of a hill just outside of town one night, looking down at the warm lights of the city twinkling in the distant. he told you about the first time he ever felt scared. you told him you only saw him as a friend. could he tell you were lying?

“take this sinking boat and point it home we’ve still got time“

tears begin to well in your eyes, blurring your vision as you play. but you don’t even need to see the keys, because you know this song too well. it’s engraved in your muscle memory. no matter how hard you try, your body will remember.

“raise your hopeful voice you have a choice you’ve made it now”

“call your girl tonight,” you reminded him as you left the recording studio for the last time. he asked you to come over to his place later, but you’re not going. you know better than that.

“falling slowly sing your melody i’ll sing it loud”

the tears are falling freely now, wetting your hands and the keys, but you continue playing as if semi were right there singing along with you, creating sweet harmonies and stirring chords together, losing yourselves in the music.

you allow the song to engulf you, the melody washing over you like a wave of pure feeling as you bid goodbye to the man you fell unwillingly, irreparably in love with.

a/n: i’m not normally an angst person, or a huge semi simp really, but i still ended up hurting my own feelings with this lmao. i’d probably let semi ruin my life as much as he wants too, let’s be real. the songs linked at the top are definitely required listening for this one (the first link is them together in the music shop, the second one is the reprise at the end) and if you really wanna experience pain, find a bootleg of the show & watch the whole thing bc i truly struggled trying not to shove the entire musical into this one fic (once again if u need help finding it i may or may not have a link if u dm me)

taglist: @izagraceee​ @musicgetsmeoutofbed​ @azo-musxas​ @tsumurai @ghostlydiamond135 @animeboysimppp @starshaped-raindrops

#haikyuu!! #semi eita #semi eita x reader #semi x reader #haikyuu x reader #25 days of ficmas #.txt #e writes

[sirspud]

BREAKING NEWS

We interrupt your regular broadcast for more shitty wish-fulfillment fanfiction written by Australian dipshit, SirSpud. Links to this atrocity are found below, and an excerpt of this nightmare is under the banner.

Fanfiction.Net: https://www.fanfiction.net/s/13615322/11/Pokemon-Diamond-and-Pearl-An-Abridged-Novella AO3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24725101/chapters/81455863

Floaroma Town was, by popular opinion, one of the most beautiful villages in Sinnoh. The place was home to a massive flower meadow that sent wonderful aromas through the town, making it a retiree’s dream and a pollen allergist’s nightmare. It was here that the Floaroma Spring Contest was starting to begin in earnest. Stalls were being set up, coordinators were practicing, and a small army of TV crews had invaded the normally quaint and quiet town, trampling the local scenery in the name of ‘cinematic shots’.

It was here that our heroes had just arrived, having made their way through the Ravaged Path and through the light forestry of Route 204 to arrive in this picturesque little village. Like any Pokémon trainer worth their salt, their first stop was to the Pokémon centre for some healing, cheap food, and a well-deserved break.

It was here that Ash and Dawn sat at a small table in the communal area. They were currently waiting on Brock to finish up with his business, whatever that was, and had each bought a rather bland pasta dish, covered with cheese and sporting a few vegetables that had been boiled to oblivion. Beside them, sitting on the ground, Pikachu and Piplup ate from their bowls of dry, tasteless kibble, trying to pretend that they were instead enjoying Brock’s cooking.

“So…” Ash started to say, trying to break the silence that had settled upon them like a blanket of awkwardness. “New contest, huh?”

“Yup.” Dawn nodded, scooping a spoonful of terrible pasta into her mouth. “Hopefully it’ll go better than last time.”

“It should do. You’ve been practicing every morning, right?”

“Urgh. I tried to.” Dawn groaned. “But I’ve been having really bad dreams lately, so I wake up and I’m not in the right headspace for it.”

“Really?” Ash said sympathetically. “How come?”

Dawn looked up from her meal with pointed, deliberate slowness to give Ash an accusatory glare of disdain.

“Oh. Right.” Ash looked away for a moment. “…Sorry.”

“…It’s fine.” Dawn sighed. “The fact that Pachirisu still isn’t listening to me isn’t helping either.”

“Ah, that stuff just comes with time.” Ash said dismissively. “When I started out, Pikachu didn’t listen to anything I said. He got a bit better after we almost drowned and got attacked by a flock of Spearrow, but it still took a long time before we trusted each other.”

“…Sweet son of Arceus, dude.” Dawn looked up at her friend in concerned disbelief. “How many times have you almost died?”

“I prefer to think it in terms of how many times I haven’t died.”

“That means the same thing!”

The sliding doors from the atrium slid open, interrupting their conversation. Brock walked slowly over to their table, clutching his lower back in pain. Croagunk followed by his side, his ever-present creepy grin upon his face.

Ash looked at Brock as he came to the table. “…Nurse Joy?”

“…Maybe.” Brock replied reluctantly, sitting next to Ash and wincing as he did so. “I think he might’ve actually poisoned me this time.”

“So, was that why you wanted to do your stuff alone?” Dawn asked, unimpressed. “So you could harass the local single women unjudged?”

“Not originally, no.” Brock sighed. “I wanted to give both of your parents a call to let them know about the Hunter J situation, but the reception here is awful. Couldn’t even get a connection.”

“…Oh. Cool.” Dawn replied, trying to hide her alarm. “Uh, weird question, but… why would you do that?”

“Yeah, why?” Ash added quickly, almost panickily.

Brock raised an eyebrow. “…Because that’s the responsible thing to do?”

“Yeah, but, like, I can do that.” Dawn said hurriedly, chuckling nervously. “You don’t have to call her, I can call her on, like, my Pokétch!”

“Mm… hm.” Brock folded his arms at her. “So, why don’t you call her now?”

It was almost issued like a challenge. Dawn opened her mouth, closed it, then she spluttered, “Well, why doesn’t Ash call his parents on his PokéDex, huh?”

“Can’t. I don’t have an internet license.” Ash explained.

Dawn stared at him for a moment, trying to make sense of what he said. Quickly giving up, she said, “Okay, well… maybe I don’t have reception here either! Did you think about that?”

“The Pokétch uses a different network than the phones here, doesn’t it?” Brock asked neutrally.

“Different doesn’t mean better!” Dawn replied defensively, holding up the hand that held the watch and pointing at the device. She heard the atrium doors open again, but she ignored them. “This thing can barely reach people a hundred feet away! There’s no way it can hold a conversation all the way to Twinleaf Town! It also can’t send texts, or set alarms, or… tell me what date it is…”

Dawn lowered her hand and looked down at the device, hesitantly admitting, “…It actually kinda sucks.”

“I see you’re still the ideal model for financial independence.” A boyish voice said from the side.

“Shut up, Kenny.” Dawn replied automatically, turning around in annoyance. “If I wanted your sass, I-”

Dawn blinked in surprise as she registered who had just spoke to her. It was a young boy, around about the same age as her, sporting a green t-shirt with white stripes worn atop a long-sleeved undershirt that was also green, but a little darker. His hair was an unkempt dark auburn mess, his eyes a blackish-brown, and his face sported a mischievous grin.

“Kenny!” Dawn cried with delight, immediately leaping up to embrace him.

The boy spread out his arms welcomingly. “Dee-Dee!”

Dawn skidded to a stop, shutting her eyes tight in a grimace.

“I hate you so much.” Dawn growled exasperatedly as Kenny burst into laughter. “Why won’t you let me forget that?”

Kenny chuckled. “Hey, you stop reacting to it, I’ll stop teasing you.”

“Oh, yeah, that’s how it works!” Dawn snapped. “That’s like a mugger going, ‘Hey, I’ll stop robbing you if you stop defending yourself’!”

Kenny smirked at her, and though she tried, Dawn couldn’t keep up the irritation for long. She broke back into a smile and embraced him.

“I missed you, dude.” Dawn sighed.

“Me too.” Kenny said as the two friends let go of each other. “I thought you were going to tell me when you started your journey!”

“…Not gonna lie, I actually completely forgot about that.” Dawn said sheepishly. “First few days were… pretty intense.”

“Wow.” Kenny folded his arms, an expression of mock hurt on his face. “I can’t believe you’d just betray me like that.”

Dawn smirked, folding her arms right back. “You really wanna talk to me about betrayal? Who was it, again, who only remembered his best friend’s birthday at the last minute?”

“Erm…”

Dawn looked back at the others, who were kind of just staring awkwardly.

“I don’t wanna be rude, but… we don’t know who this is.” Ash said.

“Ah.” Dawn stepped to the side. “Ash, Brock, this is Kenny Greenfield – my best friend stroke tormentor.”

“Yo!” Kenny greeted.

#ash ketchum #brock #dawn #pokemon #Pokemon Diamond And Pearl #fanfiction #abridgement #parody #pikachu #piplup #kenny #diamond and pearl #honestly it's more of a retelling at this point #abridged #ao3

[trashyswitch]

7 Fluffy Balls of Joy

Chapter 7: The Puppies First Grooming (DIY Version)

The 5 Jacksepticeye Egos decide to try grooming the growing dogs for the first time. This leads to more hard work than they expected, and some play time too.

This fanfic is for Shannon. I hope you enjoy more of the puppies! :)

Henrik walked out of his bedroom and widened his eyes. They had gotten so big! Where did the time go?!

“Oh good lord...You’re getting very big!” Henrik reacted.

The puppies turned right around and howled towards Henrik. Henrik laughed and knelt down, looking at the puppies. “Hello babies! More like teenagers now.” Henrik joked.

“Good morning Henrik!” Jackie greeted.

“Guten morgen!” Henrik greeted back. “Zhey’re huge now!” Henrik reacted.

“I know and SO FLUFFYYY!” Jackie was fluffing up their fur.

“Yeah...Zhey kinda need a hair cut…” Henrik told him.

“Do they though?” Jackie asked.

“Ja. Zhey do.” Henrik replied. “And zhat’s vhat ve’re gonna do today. Ve’re gonna vash, cut and groom zhe puppies.” Henrik decided.

“But that’s gonna be so much wooorrrrrrrrk.” Jackie whined.

Henrik chuckled and looked at him with a side grin. “Should’ve zhought of zhat vhen you brought home 7 puppies and a mama.” Henrik told him.

Jackie sighed and nodded. “True…”

“Oh! Ound I have a collar for Angel!” Henrik declared. He picked up his little Angel, placed the puppy onto the couch, and hooked up the magenta pink collar to the puppy. “Zhere. You are mine forever!” Henrik declared.

“Yay! Another doggy’s been claimed!” Jackie declared.

“Yeah! I hope Marble is enjoying zhe new family.” Henrik said.

“The kids did seem really excited!” Jackie told him.

As soon as Chase, Jamie and Marvin were up, Henrik and Jackie explained to the boys that they were gonna get the pets groomed. And they were gonna do it themself.

Jamie widened his eyes and let out a breath. His whole face basically said ‘this is gonna take forever’.

“I know…” Henrik muttered.

“Not even magic will be able to make this go any quicker.” Marvin told him.

“I know.” Henrik told him.

“This has been a great experience so far...but I did not sign up for grooming a litter of growing dogs.” Chase reacted.

“Okay okay, ve get it! So let’s get started!”

The boys started off with cleaning the dogs first. All 5 boys got their swim trunks and bare backs on, and started cleaning the dogs outside. Each of them had a bottle of shampoo, and were getting the dogs all lathered up. Chase shrieked as his dog shook some of the soap off, while Jamie spat and made throat noises as bits of dog soap ended up in his mouth.

Marvin groaned as the dog he was bathing, winded up rubbing her body all over the grass as she was lathered with soap. Marvin put the soap bottle down and grabbed the hose. “Good enough.”

The boys each took turns to clean the soap off the dogs with the hose, and a bucket of water. Marvin picked up cups of water, and sumped it onto the dog to let it run off the body. Meanwhile Jamie was doing it the easier way with the hose against the dog’s fur. As soon as Jamie was finished, he passed the hose to Henrik.

“SCHEIßE!” Someone shouted.

Chase turned to look at the source of the sound. But he knew exactly who it was. It was kinda obvious…

It was Henrik...With his trunks down to his knees...and the dog holding onto them, pulling them aggressively…

HOLY SHIT it was the best thing Chase had seen all month! Angel was literally pulling Henrik’s shorts down in an attempt to play with him! And Henrik was basically naked right in front of them!

“Sie mich nicht an! Don’t look at me!” Henrik reacted, covering up his sensitive areas with his hand. His face was so red...he looked like a strawberry.

Jamie was the first to burst out laughing and actually snort in response. Chase bursted out laughing right after, followed by Jackie and Marvin. Everyone was laughing at Henrik while he got his swim trunks out of Angel’s mouth. “Trottel…” Henrik muttered. “Let go!” Henrik ordered. “Verschwinde!” Henrik spat.

Angel immediately listened to Henrik and let go of his trunks. With the boys still laughing at him, Henrik growled and pulled his swim trunks back up onto his bottom.

With that hilarious moment out of the way, Chase returned to cleaning the shampoo off of his chosen puppy. While a couple of the puppies proved to despise the water, Chase’s puppy seemed to like it! He was panting, running for the water, and trying to eat the water that came from the hose. Chase giggled at this and splashed a bit of water onto his face. This made the dog shove his face into the grass and rub his back all over the wet grass. Chase was laughing as he watched. But his laughter quickly turned to surprise the moment the dog jumped and tackled Chase onto his back with its wet body.

“Ahahahaw, come on man! So much for being dry…” Chase reacted.

“You’re a naughty little guy, aren’t ya?” Marvin teased Chase’s dog. “Yeah you are! Such a mischievous little nut!” Marvin teased.

The dog started barking and wagging his tail faster than the wind. He looked ready to sprint a marathon.

“What? You wanna run? Or jump around?” Marvin asked.

Suddenly, the dog pounced onto Marvin next and knocked him right down to the ground! “Ohoho man! You’re stronger than I thought!” Marvin reacted.

“He’s like a quarterback!” Jackie reacted.

Hey, that’s not a bad idea” Chase reacted. “There just might be a name idea for you!” Chase reacted. “Maybe Rebel? For Dublin Rebels?” He asked. “Or...” Chase added.

Jamie ran to Chase and fingerspelled a word for him:

‘B-L-I-T-Z’

Chase looked at the dog and smiled. “That’s perfect! Couldn’t have come up with anything better.”

Jamis smiled proudly.

“Blitz. His name is Blitz.” Chase decided.

Marvin smiled and knelt down to pet Chase’s dog. “Blitz...It suits him!” Marvin told him.

“Never heard of a dog being named something from football before!” Jackie reacted.

“Well, Air Bud is already taken.” Chase mentioned. “And I wasn’t gonna steal their name for the heck of it.” Chase added.

“True…” Jackie mentioned. “Alright! So we have Matilda, Angel, Marble and Blitz!” Jackie declared. “Well, kinda Marble...He’s off living with a new family.” Jackie added.

“Now: Let’s get these guys cut.” Marvin declared.

Boy oh boy, was that a process! Most of the boys only used scissors, while Henrik went for the full shaving to tackle all the hair. “If I shave it, I will not need cut it for a vhile.”

“But she’s gonna look ugly if you do that.” Chase warned. “You don’t want people cringing at your dog, do you?” Chase asked.

A couple seconds later, Henrik grabbed the scissors. “Zhey’re better anyvay.” Henrik told them.

“I wonder who told you that…” Chase muttered with a smirk on his face.

The dog hair that came off the dogs was overwhelming. Chase considered grabbing a vacuum cleaner to use on his clothes, while Jameson was fluffing his choice dog every 5 minutes to get all the hair out. Both cut and uncut hair would fly out of the dog’s coat and into his face.

“I wonder if paying for a groomer would be cheaper and less messy than cutting them ourselves.” Jackie asked.

“Cheaper? Nein. Less messy? Ja.” Henrik replied.

“I didn’t ask you.” Jackie told him. “I asked everyone but you, because we all know what your answer would’ve been.” Jackie explained.

“Youch…My feelings…” Henrik muttered.

Soon, the cutting was finished and the dogs were done. Jackie used a bag of treats to get the dogs to follow him, while Chase and Henrik gathered a majority of the dog hair with the vacuum cleaner. “Who knew we’d be vacuuming grass?” Chase mentioned.

“Not me.” Henrik replied.

“It’s not far off from a carpet, actually. It just breaks a little easier.” Chase admitted.

“Ja.” Henrik replied.

Chase smiled as the dawn looked cleaner. “All done!” Chase declared.

“Now to-” Henrik had turned around and stared with wide eyes at the new mess that had been made.

“Uuuugh...Jackie! Vhy?!” Henrik asked.

“Because they need it!” Jackie reacted.

It turns out that Jackie had taken the time to brush the dog's fur. This created a brand new gigantic pile of dog hair.

Henrik growled while Chase sighed. “I don’t even know if the vacuum can handle much more dog hair…” Chase muttered.

“Ve could make anozher dog vizh all zhis dog hair.” Henrik told him.

“Maybe even summon a new golden retriever with this much hair.” Chase joked.

“Ja, basically.” Henrik replied.

Henrik and Chase took the time to further clean up the lawn with the dog hair. “I wonder...does dog hair turn into a type of fertilizer? Or does it just turn to dead skin that looks like ash?” Chase asked.

“How about ve DON’T zhink of zhat?” Henrik suggested.

“What’s wrong Henrik? Don’t like the idea of dust mites taking over the lawn?” Chase teased.

“Nein! Nein nein nein! Deesgusting!” Henrik reacted.

“Awww, the poor doctor is a germaphobe! He’d better watch out! Cause there’s one evil germ he CAN’T wash off with water~” Chase teased.

“Vell, zhere’s technically-” Henrik’s words were quickly interrupted by a squeal of his own. Chase had squeezed his sides, causing Henrik’s knees to buckle. “VAHAHAIT! NEIN! NOT KITZELN! NAAAH!”

Chase sat right down onto Henrik’s hips and skittered his fingers all over Henrik’s belly. “kitzeln kitzeln kitzeln kitzeln kitzeln kitzeln!” Chase said in almost perfect german.

Henrik shrieked at that and giggled like a little toddler. Chase’s german voice sounded a little too much like his Dad’s teases from when he was a kid. “bihihihitte hör ahahauf damihihihit aaaHAHAHAHAHA!” Henrik’s laughter doubled in severity the moment his armpits were attacked.

“Oooooh! Ticklish in the pitsies, huh?” Chase teased.

“NIHIHICHE MEINE FÜHÜHÜHÜßE!” Henrik begged. “BAHAHAHAHAHAHA! ES KITZELT SO SEHEHEHEHR!” Henrik laughed.

“Damn! I can’t even understand you right now! All I know in German are the words ‘Nein’, ‘Ja’, ‘halt’, and now ‘kitzelt’!” Chase reacted. “And those all mean ‘No’, ‘Ya’, ‘Stop’, and ‘Tickle’!” Chase reacted.

“Teheheheuflisch! TEUFLIHIHISCH!” Henrik yelled back.

“I wonder what that means...Maybe ‘bastard’? Or ‘enough’?” Chase asked.

“IHIHIT MEHEHEANS EHEHEVIHIL, YOHOHOU IHIHIDIOHOHOT!” Henrik yelled back.

“Ooooh! You called me evil in German?! How dare you!” Chase reacted.

“Evil?! Well if THAT’S the case:” Jackie got into his superhero costume in a snap, and quickly started tickling Chase.

“Wait WHAHAHAHAT?! OHOHO NOHOHOHO!” Chase laughed.

“Jackieboy Man to the rescue!” Jackie declared.

Marvin ran to Blitz and put a treat into Chase’s pocket. “Hey blitz! Sick ‘em!” Marvin encouraged.

Blitz jumped at Chase and tackled the man down to the ground. “OHOHOHOW! Ohoho geheheez! OHOHO NOHOHO BAHAHAHAHAHA!” Chase bursted out laughing as Blitz started digging his snout into Chase’s hip. “BLIHIHITZ OHOHOFF!” Chase tried to tell him.

But the dog didn’t listen and just kept tickling as he dug for the treat. The dog made borking noises and dug its paws in to get the treat as well. But it was proving to be harder than he expected to get it out.

“HEHEHENRIHIHIK HEHEHELP!” Chase begged.

“Naaaaah! You’re fiiiiine! You’re getting zhe kitzeln! Kitzeln kitzeln kitzeln!” Henrik teased. “Ist Rache nicht süß?” Henrik joked.

“YOHOHOU BAHAHASTAHAHAHARD!” Chase yelled as he shoved his face into the grass. “IHIHIT TIHIHICKLEHEHES!”

“Entschuldigung, my irisch friend. I don’t quite understand you very vell.” Henrik complained teasingly. “Vhat does ‘tickle’ mean again?” Henrik joked.

“SHUHUT UHUHUP! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!” Chase laughed and squealed.

“Rude! So rude!” Henrik reacted. Henrik walked up to the dog, and removed the treat from Chase’s pocket for him. “Zhere you go Blitz.” Henrik replied. “Poor Blitz, being deprived of zhe treats. Especially for being a good boy!” Henrik said in a baby voice. “Good doggy! Zhat’s a good doggy!” Henrik started petting Blitz more and fluffing his fur around.

The dog woofed proudly and tackled Henrik to the ground to give him endless licks on the chin. Henrik giggled at the ticklish kisses and took them. “Zhahahank yohohou Blihihitz!” Henrik said to him.

The dog did one last bark of a reply before licking his face again.

Chase smiled as he watched. Perhaps the crazy grooming idea was worth the precious time with the puppies.

Soon, the boys decided as a collective to call a groomer for their dogs’ next haircuts.

#7fluffyballsofjoy #7 #ticklefic #dog grooming #hard work #ler!blitz #switch!chase #switch!henrik #ler!jackie

[keysszz]

Coming Out

A ROTTMNT Fanfic

Requested by @ash-the-sparrow-queen

He wasn’t supposed to have feelings.

He had a bad boy image to obtain; he had to act cool and suave like nothing would ever faze him.

(Though apparently if you were a “bad boy”, you had to understand the social construct and the overall point of society to fit that description. What he couldn’t understand was why a “bad boy” image was the complete opposite of what it was set out to be. The overall definition was just deceptive.)

But here he was in April’s apartment trying to tell her his secret, the feelings just flowing over him.

He didn’t exactly know how to put it in words, which was weird for him to admit. He always had speeches ready and the words could always just flow out of him (both scientific or just plain witty insults), but at the moment he just couldn’t speak.

April would understand him, and he knew that. Heck, even Leo would understand him, but every time he tried to talk to his twin he’d get nervous. He knew that Leo would never make fun of him or tease him, but he just couldn’t talk about it when he was near him.

Why did feelings have to be so tough?

By the amount of silence in the room, Donnie was beginning to get uncomfortable. If anything April should be the uncomfortable one, but by the way she looked at the softshell and waited for him to talk it seemed like she could sit there all day.

Taking a deep breath, he told her what he was thinking.

“I’m bi...”

He turned the other direction, not wanting to see April’s face whenever she responded. What he was startled by was when April rested her hand on his shoulder.

“Donnie, that’s ok,” she said with a small smile. “Have you told the others yet?”

“Not yet,” he replied. “I just don’t know how they’ll react.”

“They won’t think of you in any other way,” April told him. “You should know that Leo wouldn’t think of you differently. He came out and said that he was trans, like what, a couple of weeks ago? He’d understand, and so would everyone else.”

“That doesn’t make me feel any better,” Donnie sighed. “I just have a feeling that something is gonna go wrong.”

Silence filled the room, April’s hand still placed on the genuis’ shoulder. She held his shoulder and her grip got tighter as he talked.

“There’s a lot of stories out there, April,” Donnie said quietly. “And most of them end up badly. Some people don’t even accept them when they do come out... I know that my brothers wouldn’t do that, but something inside of me just doesn’t want to tell them.”

“You don’t have to tell them now,” April replied. “It took Leo a while for him to come out and tell everyone as well.”

For the first time in that conversation, Donnie looked up at April and raised his eyebrow.

“How do you know that?”

“He came to me first,” she smiled. “You guys kinda have a thing of coming to me before you talk to everyone else.”

Donnie looked at her for a little longer before staring at the ground.

“But give it time, whenever you feel ready you can tell them,” she continued. “Leo was a nervous wreck too. He kept saying that he didn’t know how to feel about you guys, he eventually said that he felt like you guys were gonna disown him...”

Donnie’s head shot up in shock as he looked at his best friend.

“But we’d never do that,” he countered. 

“That’s what I told him,” April replied. “He doesn’t feel the same way now that he’s told you, but he was an emotional mess that day.”

She could remember the interaction with the red slider like it had happened yesterday. Leo had come into her room in tears, not knowing how to tell his family about his gender. That night resulted with a movie and a lot of hugs, and the slider felt better now that April had given him advice.

April smiled again as she carried on.

“You two are similar in many ways, you know.”

Donnie chuckled a little as he looked back at her.

“Thanks, April,” he said with a smile.

“No problem,” she grinned. “Just give it time. If you don’t feel comfortable telling everyone else, then you can tell them later.”

She hugged Donnie, laughing when the softshell let out a grunt. Donnie leaned into the hug after a couple of seconds, and they stayed like that for a while. It was nice for him to have someone that would listen, and in time he would soon come out to his family.

... Maybe in a couple of weeks, but he would soon know the right time.

#rottmnt fanfic #rottmnt #rottmnt donnie #rottmnt april #rottmnt leo #april o'neil

[dadgonedeku]

Celebrating Bakugou’s Birthday Headcanons

💥🎊~SFW (very fluffy...the most fluffy)

💥🎊~Bakugou x Fem!Reader (mutual pining)

💥🎊~Happy Birthday to the little rat, here are some hcs to celebrate! 🥳

💥🎊~Tbh I should have just made this a oneshot because that’s basically what it is but in HC format because it’s easier for me to write whoopsies...🥴

💥🎊~I wrote this in like four hours so I’m super sorry if it sucks...it was honestly really hard for me to write with no motivation what so ever but I just wanted to make sure I got something out in time for the baby’s b day! Double whoopsies 🥴

💥🎊~Also long post triple whoopsies 🥳

💥🎊~ “Here we go, today is the day!” You say to yourself as you wake up in the morning, already excited for what’s to come.

💥🎊~ You see reader, you and the rest of 1A (mainly the bakusquad) decided to surprise the gruff explosion boy for his birthday.

💥🎊~ And as you got ready that morning, you decided to take a little extra time in making yourself look even more beautiful than you already were, examples being putting on a little more makeup than usual or even taking some extra time to learn a new hairstyle.

💥🎊~ You’ve had a crush on the ash blonde for a while now, ever since the beginning of the school year, and it only continued to grow as you watched him become stronger and develop more of a gruff softness with his classmates.

💥🎊~ So this was the perfect opportunity to show him how much you cared, and on top of that you had an excuse for you lookin even more ‘like a snacc’ than usual.

💥🎊~ “Y/N!!!! Come on hurry up!!” You hear you’re best friend Ashido knock at your door, you quickly finish whatever you’re doing and pull yourself together, taking a quick glance at how you looked in a mirror before opening the door.

💥🎊~ “Geez girlie, you look bomb, get it, bomb?” You huff a laugh at the bad joke as she takes in your appearance.

💥🎊~ “I don’t think I’ve ever seen you this spruced up before, well except for that one party you got to go too. Lookin good, ready to try and reel him in?” She teases as she takes a quick snap of one of your bra straps under your shirt.

💥🎊~ “Ashi!!! No. And besides, I’m sure he doesn’t even like me back anyways.” You shoot back as a bright pink blush paints itself on your s/c cheeks. Ashido was the only one who knew about your longtime crush on the ash blonde, and frankly she was the only one you trusted enough. Fortunately for you, she proved liable.

💥🎊~ “Ha, I wouldn’t think so, have you seen the way he looks at you whenever you’re paired up in a match or even during the sports fest?” She asks excitedly as she steps into your dorm room, following you over to your bedside table as you open the top drawer, retrieving a medium sized box wrapped in a bright orange paper, a green bow attached to black ribbons sitting on top of it.

💥🎊~ “No Ashido, and ya wanna know why? Because I’d be in the middle of a FIGHT then!” You playfully yell back as she lets out a laugh at your flustered face. “Plus, I’m sure that’s not even true anyways, there’s nothing special about me that would make him ‘fall in love’” You quote with your hands as you take the gift from your drawer, tucking it under your dominant arm as you grab your purse with the other.

💥🎊~ “Alright, think what you want. Just know that you are a tasty lady with a tasty bod and personality and if he don’t like it back, he doesn’t deserve you.” She chuckles with her hands on her hips as you roll your eyes amusingly in response, nudging her out of the door as you close it behind you.

💥🎊~ “Where is he right now anyways?” You inquire as you and Ashido make your way down the fourth floor hall to the elevator, “Doesn’t he get up really early in the mornings?”

💥🎊~ “Yep, sure does. To be fair I don’t really know what he’s doing right now, but he’s not in the common room.” She responded as the two of you stepped in the elevator, pressing the lobby button that would transport you to the common room.

💥🎊~ “Oh, well I hope someone came up with a good enough distraction so we have enough time to get everything ready.” You say hopefully as the elevator drifted downward, Ashido nodding in agreement. The rest was silence, a few moments going by before the familiar ‘ding!’ sound of the elevator alerted the two of you that you had arrived to the floor.

💥🎊~ You took a deep breath and fiddled with a necklace that hung around your neck, anxiety building of the unknown, and if your secret plan would actually work. Ashido placed a comforting pink hand on your shoulder and flashed you a small smile, you shot one back and took a deep breath, closing your e/c eyes for a moment before stepping out of the elevator.

💥🎊~ “There you guys are!” Kaminari waved happily from the common space, alerting the rest of your classmates that you and Ashido had finally shown. Well...all except for two?

💥🎊~ “Huh? Where’s Kirishima? Wasn’t he another mastermind of all this?” You ask curiously, placing your box on one of tables and signaling to Urakaka to keep an eye on it, to which, of course, she saluted with a bright smile.

💥🎊~ “Oh he’s keeping Kacchan occupied for now, they went to the gym for a workout an hour or two ago.” Your vibrant green-eyed classmate Midoriya replied with a grin, also holding a small box in his right hand.

💥🎊~ You took a sigh of relief, thankful that Kirishima had bought some time...but wait...Midoriya said a couple hours ago...

💥🎊~ oh no...

💥🎊~ “Wait?! A couple hours ago? That means that they’re almost done by now right?” You ask suddenly, startling a few of your classmates in the process, a couple seconds go by before all hell breaks loose, Iida resorting to shouting out orders to his various fellow classmates.

💥🎊~ You and the other girls were tasked with setting up tables and helping hang streamers from the ceilings, Urakaka’s quirk coming in handy as she would hold onto you as you attached the fragile paper material to the bland, off white ceiling.

💥🎊~ Orange and Black sheets were draped over the kitchen tables as Sato and Momo worked in the kitchen, whipping up tea and desserts for the class to enjoy during the party.

💥🎊~ To be fair, all of them would probably be chewed out by said birthday boy for ‘doing too damn much’ but deep down they all knew that he would appreciate it.

💥🎊~ Bakugou, however, never really thought much about his birthday, sure he celebrated it as a child but once he became a teen he kinda dropped it. He never really saw the appeal, I mean...all a birthday means is that you turn a year older right? To him it was just another day, so why did it matter so much to the rest of his class?

💥🎊~ Well, all of you had been through a lot as a class, with all of the villain attacks and heartache never seeming to end. It was rough, and it was hard to deal with. But the 21 of you still managed to get through it together, but part of you feels like Bakugou was hit the hardest by it all. Him and Midoriya of course.

💥🎊~ You’d never really seen him show any emotion aside from anger or brashness, maybe you’d even experienced some sass or a few cocky comments. But that’s about it....

💥🎊~ So why did you care so much about him?

💥🎊~ Why did your heart flutter every time you saw him?

💥🎊~ Why?

💥🎊~ You never realize that you had subconsciously tuned out the happy smiles and giggles and shouting as you don’t pay attention to the front doors opening and the immediate echo of “Surprise!” that comes right after.

💥🎊~ “Y/N!! Look out!” Urakaka shouts from below you, snapping you out of your thoughts, which only resulted in you to beginning to fall from the ceiling as you hear your female friend shout “release!” from underneath you. A scream rips from your throat as your body fails to react fast enough for you to catch yourself. You clench your eyes shut as your vision catches quick blurs of your classmates scrambling after you.

💥🎊~ 1000 thoughts rush through your brain as you brace yourself as best you can for impact in those quick couple seconds.

💥🎊~ But the impact never...came?

💥🎊~ “Oi, the hell was that for dumbass?” You hear a gruff voice say as your eyes open in shock, your mind drawing a blank as you stare up at none other than Bakugou himself, who had caught you in the heat of the moment with that sexy rapid reaction time of his-

💥🎊~ “I....uhhh...” You fail to answer as your eyes dart around the room, only for them to land on Ashido trying her best to hold in a laugh. “ I don’t really...know?”

💥🎊~ “Hah?! Whattaya mean you don’t know? You just fell from the ceiling! Watch how you release your quirk pink cheeks!” He shouts as he gently places you back on your feet, keeping a strong hand on your back to make sure you’re steady before removing it.

💥🎊~ Embarrasment rushes through your body, giving you shivers and goosebumps as you quickly look for Urakaka. “Urakaka what happened?” You unintentionally shout in her direction. She flushes profusely and shakes her hands in front of her before moving to cover it.

💥🎊~ “There was a huge spider right next to you on the ceiling, and I didn’t wanna startle you but I know how much you hate them so-“ She starts but interrupts with a very profuse “I’m so sorry I panicked!” that you can’t help but chuckle at. You calm down a little more and thank her for looking out for you before apologizing yourself, but you still can’t help the huge blush that rushes to your cheeks.

💥🎊~ ‘Omg omg omg that did nOt just happen he did nOt jUsT cATCH mE I-‘

💥🎊~ The worries voices of your fellow classmates snap you out of your thoughts once again as you rush to reassure them you’re okay.

💥🎊~ “Y/N are you okay?!” Midoriya and Kirishima ask in unison.

💥🎊~ “Ah! I’m fine! I promise!” You say, only before turning to face Bakugou, who was looking away...almost as if...

💥🎊~ ‘he was embarrassed too...’

💥🎊~ “Thank you, Bakugou.” You say lightly as you flash him a small smile of gratitude, only for him to reply with a rough ‘tch’.

💥🎊~ “Okay! Now that that’s over let’s get this party started!!!” You hear Ashido yell eagerly over the rest of the class, soon enough shouts of agreement could be heard as Sato and Momo appeared from the kitchen with Tea and Cupcakes, along with an actual birthday cake that was hidden in the back of the kitchen.

💥🎊~ You hear a “Tch, nerds” from behind you as you rush to the goods, your classmates following close behind as you help Momo and Sato set up the food and drinks.

💥🎊~ The day continued on with Bakugou putting up an annoyed front as you all agree in shouting happy birthday, blowing kazoos and pulling strings on confetti poppers as he reluctantly blows out the array of candles that are placed on the huge 3-tier cake that Sato had been working on all day. It was truly magnificent, white fondant draped over each of the layers, decorated with orange and green stripes with black frosted roses trimming the third tier, ‘Ground Zero’ written in cursive along the top of the cake that was encased in the roses.

💥🎊~ “Holy crap Sato!! You really went all out!!!” You hear Kaminari say behind you as you hear the clicks of phone cameras sound off around you, all of your friends recording and taking pictures to remember the happy moment.

💥🎊~ A few more minutes pass and each one of you has a cup of tea and a cupcake in hand as you all parade around the birthday boy, much to his surprise and slight annoyance, but he’ll never admit that deep down he was thankful for the enthusiastic celebration.

💥🎊~ Cheap, plastic party hats are passed around and even Mr. Aizawa partakes in the festivities, wishing the ash blonde his own happy birthday as he retrieves a cupcake and teacup himself, much to your surprise.

💥🎊~ Soon enough it’s time for present opening as Kaminari nudges the birthday boi over to the couches, the other 19 of you taking sitting positions accordingly around a coffee table that was filled with presents from everyone.

💥🎊~ “The hell is all this for?!”

💥🎊~ “For you Bakubro, duh.”

💥🎊~ “You extras do too damn much.”

💥🎊~ “But you still love us anyways.”

💥🎊~ “Tch.”

💥🎊~ His gifts include all different items, from boxes of pocky and video games, to even hoodies and fitted shirts and sweats, and of course a custom pair of black crocs with the words ‘ground zero’ spelled across the front in the little attachments...wonder who those could be from?

💥🎊~ “You’ve gotta be kidding me Shitty Hair...”

💥🎊~ “Don’t hate the player man, hate the game.”

💥🎊~ Your eyes widen as you see him reach for your gift to him, and you immediately find the courage to speak up and excuse yourself to the bathroom, when really, you were lying and choose to sneak outside instead.

💥🎊~ “But Y/N isn’t that your gift?” You hear Sero inquire.

💥🎊~ “Yeah but it’s fine! I really gotta go though.”

💥🎊~ “If you say so...”

💥🎊~ You quickly look back and notice that he opens it slower than the other ones, taking out a small index card you had placed in the lid of the box, you quickly glance through one of the window, only to see him reading it before you hide yourself from view.

💥🎊~ ‘Meet me outside, it’s important’ The card read, written in messy f/c gel pen.

💥🎊~ He sighs before quickly standing up and brushing off anyone who questions him, he grunts out a “Ill be back soon, screw off and don’t worry about it.” Before walking towards the front door.

💥🎊~ To his and your surprise...no one followed, and no one even seemed to question it.

💥🎊~ You feel your breath hitch in your throat as you hear the front door open and see Bakugou step out, turning to face you and letting the door close softly behind him. He flashes you the card and you give a small nod in response, almost as if the two of you had just silently confirmed the reason why you even wanted him here in the first place.

💥🎊~ “Well, what is it?” He asks with his usual gruff tone, but for some reason it feels much softer than earlier.

💥🎊~ “Umm...well I-“

💥🎊~ The worry comes up again as your mind decides to draw a blank on you once again, and you can’t help but blush profusely and look away. Why? Why are you like this? Why can’t you just say what you want to say? You hate it, you dread it. This empty and tingly gut feeling in your stomach, almost as if it is truly churning to the sounds of your embarrassment.

💥🎊~ “Well? Out with it already, don’t have all night ya know.” He replies bluntly as he leans back on the rails of the front porch, crossing his arms in front of him as he switches his gaze to the wooden ground instead of your flustered form.

💥🎊~ ‘Come on, out with it already y/n! He’s right here, right in front of you. He paid attention, he didn’t come out here for no reason. Just come on...say it....do it.’

💥🎊~ “Alright, think what you want. Just know that you are a tasty lady with a tasty bod and personality and if he don’t like it back, he doesn’t deserve you.”

💥🎊~ ‘fuck it, here goes nothing...’

💥🎊~ “If you’re not gonna say anything then I’m just gonna go back inside, this is a waste of my time.” He says, causing you’re eyes to widen and tear up. You shake your head silently as he turns his back to you, walking toward the door and reaching his hand out to the handle.

💥🎊~ ...but you grab it just in time...

💥🎊~ “Stop...” The word that exits your lips is barely audible as he feels the shake in your voice.

💥🎊~ “Hah? What is it then? You wanted me to come out here? So if you’re not gonna say anything then I don’t see the appeal in wasting-“

💥🎊~ “ I like you.”

💥🎊~ You feel the world stop around you and the silence that immediately follows as you prepare yourself for the worst. Good lord, the words just came out...they just escaped your lips and you could barely even handle it.

💥🎊~ “What?” Is all you hear back...

💥🎊~ ‘screw it, it’s too late to go back now...’

💥🎊~ “ I like you...Bakugou. I do...and I’m sorry if it’s weird or anything and honestly I’m okay if you don’t feel the same way...but I just want you to know anyways...”

💥🎊~ He only stares in silence, crimson eyes widened with shock.

💥🎊~ “I’ve felt like this for a long time to tell you the truth, and if I’m being honest I’ve tried to shake it off countless times but i just can’t get you out of my head. Whenever you show up and show out, whenever you talk about your dreams of becoming the number one hero...I can’t help but smile and think about how hard you must be working, and how far you must be pushing yourself to get stronger. And I feel it in my heart whenever I see you look my way or whenever you stand tall with a huge boasting smile after you’ve just won a battle. You’re amazing Bakugou...and I know that you’re gonna make it. I know that you’re going to get where you want to be, and I can’t help...but...we’ll I can’t help but long to be there with you as your journey continues...”

💥🎊~ more silence...

💥🎊~ “and I want to be there for you when you finally reach your goal...if you’ll have me of course.” You can only look down at the ground, twiddling your thumbs in anticipation as you let the words just explode from your lips...silence...more and more silence...“I love you...Bakugou.”

💥🎊~ The moments pass painfully slow as the silence fills the air and you feel heartache set in again.

💥🎊~ “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to say all of it at once. I’m sure it’s a lot and I don’t want to-“

💥🎊~ “Shut up.” Is all you hear, and before you can even register the sound of Bakugou’s boots hit the wood...you feel strong and calloused hands engulf your face and wipe away your tears.

💥🎊~ tears you didn’t even know you were shedding...

💥🎊~ “Baku-“

💥🎊~ “I said shut up...ya damn nerd.”

💥🎊~ And you do...as you instinctively reach for his waist, wrapping your arms around it as your bury your face in his chest, finally letting out the sobs that you had kept in for so long...it was finally out...and he finally knew. And all you could feel was relief as you felt his right hand come up to rest on the top of your head.

💥🎊~ “Tch...you girls...always so damn emotional...just like Deku....” You hear him huff out in a short chuckle as you giggle slightly through your tears.

💥🎊~ “I’m sorry...”

💥🎊~ “You know...I’ve been thinking about it...”

💥🎊~ “Oh?”

💥🎊~ “and I think I love you too...Y/N.”

💥🎊~ It takes you a few seconds to even register the words that come out of his mouth. He lets you pull away from his chest and take a few steps back...e/c eyes meeting crimson ones as you stare at him in disbelief, mouth agape.

💥🎊~ “Yo- Your- hold on...you’re joking right?” You whisper with a shaky voice, just loud enough for him to hear as you bring a hand to clutch your chest.

💥🎊~ “Do I look like the type of person who jokes about shit like this? Idiot, of course I’m not joking.”

💥🎊~ “Then that means-“

💥🎊~ “Yeah...I like you too, dumbass.”

💥🎊~ “Holy shit...” You don’t even finish your sentence as you squeal, your hands rushing to cover your mouth, tears starting up again.

💥🎊~ “Oi...” “Holy shit.” “Oi!” “Holy shit.” “Oi!!! Y/N!” You finally snap out of it as your gaze switches back to his, he gives you a look that means it’s time to go back to being serious and you do, pulling yourself together before turning to face him again.

💥🎊~ “So are we gonna do this or what?” He asks bluntly, holding out a pale, calloused palm your way.

💥🎊~ It takes you a few moments to respond...but when you do-

💥🎊~ “Yeah...let’s do it.” You say as you take the hand that reaches out to you, only to be pulled into a deep, sweet, and intimate kiss as the sun sets on the horizon.

💥🎊~ Your first...and his first.

💥🎊~ “Happy birthday...Bakugou.”

💥🎊~ “Katsuki, call me Katsuki.”

💥🎊~WOWIE ITS FINALLY OVER WOOO!!!! HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO THE RAT AND IF YOU SOMEHOW REACHED THE END OF THIS POST I APPLAUD YOU! This took so much thinking for me to write out the way I wanted and honestly I’m pretty darn proud of it...so I hope you enjoyed it too! If you like it then please lemme know what you thought!!! I love talking to you guys! Have a good night and happy 4/20/20!!!🥰🎊💞

#bnha #boku no hero academia #my hero academia #mha #fluff #headcanons #bakugou katsuki #bakugou x you #bakugou x reader #bakugous birthday #happy birthday #happy birthday bakugou #4/20 #celebrating bakugous birthday #happy birthday you feral rat #female reader

[kimnjss]

[ quickie— ]

NAMJOON

he would be running late for his meeting with the managers. the two of you had spend the night watching movies.

he ended up falling asleep on the couch, wanting to finish the last half hour when you decided to go to bed.

you were in the shower, practicing self care. your hair wrapped up in a hair mask underneath a shower cap.

a avocado face mask covering your skin.

the should of the shower door swinging open would pull you out of your concentration.

“joon! i’m kinda in here.” he’d just barely nod at your words, getting in behind you.

“i’m late.” he’d grumble sleepily.

“let me just wash my face and i’ll move.” he’d nod his head with a yawn, stepping closer to wrap his arms around your waist.

“you smell so nice.” his head would nuzzle against your neck. you’d smile back at him. “it’s that body scrub you got me.”

his hand would drop lower until his fingers were between your legs. the tips of his fingers brushing against your clit as he pushed your legs apart.

“i thought you were late?” you’d wonder through a moan.

“i am.” he’d reply, while lining up the tip of his cock to your entrance.

you’d gasp as he pushed himself deep inside of you, your hands falling against the tiles.

JIN

your hands would nervously pull at the ends of your dress, staring at your reflection in the mirror.

“don’t you think i should go with the black dress? she might like that one better.”

jin would roll his eyes you’ve changed your outfit three times before.

“babe, would you quit your worrying? you’re just meeting my mom.”

your eyes would widen at his words. “just meeting your mom!? what if she hates me and decides she doesn’t want her son seeing someone like me anymore? what if she--”

he’d cut your sentence short with his mouth, his hands settling on your hips as he turned away from the mirror.

“she’ll love you, because i love you.”

his words would do very little to calm you, your body twisting to stare in the mirror again.

“alright well, do i look bland?”

he’d laugh with a shake of his head. “no, you look hot. just relax.”

his hands would move up toward the strap of your dress pulling it down to expose more of your shoulder as he’d lean down to press wet kisses against your shoulder.

that was your favorite spot to be kissed. he’d trial kisses up toward your neck as his hands hiked your dress up.

“so pretty,” he’d grin, the tips of his fingers brushing against the lace of your panties.

“babe!” you’d smack his hand away, staring at his smug face through the mirror. “she’ll be here any minute.”

yeah and you need to relax.” he’d bring his hands back to your panties, pushing them down your legs before pressing his mouth against yours.

you’d react instantly, wrapping your arms around his neck and kissing him back sweetly.

he’d lead you toward the bed, hovering his body over yours as his hand reached into his jeans, pulling his cock out.

his lips would press open mouthed kisses against your cheeks, neck and lips as he’d align the tip of his dick with your entrance.

“i love you. so she’ll love you.” he’d mumble as he presses another kiss to your lips, thrusting forward.

you’d moan. “i love you too, baby.”

YOONGI

 “you think they’re in there waiting for us?” you’d mumble, leaning over the middle part of yoongi’s car. your hand rubbing against the crotch of his jeans.

yoongi would hiss under your touch, his eyes leaving your face and landing on the front door of the dorms. “maybe.”

weeks before the eight of you hand planned a camping trip, it seemed like something you’d keep talking about but never doing-- until it was here.

you and yoongi had spent the night at your house which was miles away from where the boys lived.

throughout the entire drive, you couldn’t keep your eyes or hands off of your boyfriend and now that he was parked you couldn’t resist any longer.

“we can be fast right? i want you so bad.” you’d pout, lifting your body up to whisper in his ear your lisp pressing against the shell of it.

yoongi would do very little to fight against the urge to take you right than and there.

his hands would wrap around your waist, lifting your body up and onto his lap ash e took your mouth in a sloppy kiss.

his hand would slip down the front of your jeans, the tips of his fingers teasing your slit. “how are you already so wet?”

you’d shrug. “you’re sexy when you drive.”

he’d claim your mouth in another intense kiss while his hands worked the buttons of your jeans, tugging them off and tossing them into the passengers seat.

as yoongi would press open mouth kisses against your skin, you’d work on freeing his cock from his jeans.

you’d keep your eyes on his as you sunk down on his length, watching the change in his expression as your tightness squeezed him.

your hips would move against his rhythmically, your hands resting on his shoulders as he held onto your hips.

“fuck, y/n. ride me just like that baby.”

HOSEOK

“we’re on in fifteen, hobi.” namjoon would say as he passed the two of you he’d nod slightly, brows lifting as he turned his attention back to you.

you’d laugh instantly, knowing exactly what was going through his mind.

“you’re such a horn dog! i said i’d show you after your show.” you had made a seat of his lap, legs wrapped around his waist and forehead pressed against his.

hobi would rest his hands on your ass, the tips of his fingers massaging into the flesh.

“why wait when you can just show me now?” he’d smirk, pressing an open mouthed kiss against your throat. “we got time.” 

you’d giggle at the feeling of his mouth against your skin, already feeling your body heating up. it didn’t help when he began using his teeth.

“show me~,” he’d whine. you’d shake your head, leaning forward to press your lips against his.

his tongue would quickly take over your mouth, twisting and pushing against yours as he used the grip he held on your ass to pull you tighter against him. you’d moan as he began to trail kisses down the side of your neck.

“come on, show me.” his hands would pull at the hem of your jeans. you’d roll your eyes, sliding off his lap and leading him toward the nearest bathroom.

he’d grin wide at you as you went to lock the door. you’d roll your eyes and laugh, tugging your jeans down.

in fancy writing there would be the henna tattoo you got for his birthday.

“that’s hot. you got my name right there... like i own it.” he’d smirk moving to close the space between you.

you’d flush at his words, “because you do.” you’d mumble out, watching his change in expression.

hobi would cover your mouth in a hungry kiss you could feel how hard he was.

“we don’t have time...” you’d groan, feeling the roll of his hips. “we do.” he’d insist before loosening his jeans.

JIMIN

the smirk on his face when he chose your seats told his entire motive for asking you out tonight.

you nearly rolled your eyes.

jimin’s grin would only grow wider as he settled in the seats at the back of the movie theater.

you’d sit right beside him, settling the bag of popcorn on the floor beside your feet.

“i can’t wait for the movie to start.” he’d grin, taking your hand in his. you’d laugh. “i’m sure you can’t.”

the lights would dim as the beginning credits start to roll and you’d sit like that for a while.

it wouldn’t be until the first act came to an end would his hand drag yours onto his lap setting it on the hardness of his cock.

you feigned a surprised expression which he chuckled at.

without a second though, his lips would find your exposed neck. your hand would gently palm him through his jeans he dropped his arm around your waist.

jimin would easily lift you up into his lap, his hands hiking your skirt up toward your waist

the loudness of his choice film, his insistence of you wearing this skirt, picking seats all the way in the back. “you planned this, huh?” you’d look down at him with a smirk.

“of course,” he’d laugh, pressing a soft kiss to your lips. his fingers would push your panties to the side, finding you wet for him.

you were always wet for him.

with one hand, he’d align himself with your entrance, craning his neck to watch your reaction as you took all of him in.

TAEHYUNG

his hand would slip underneath the table and between your legs easily. he’d been teasing you all day so feeling his touch made you sign in relief.

tae would have his elbow propped on the table, his chin resting on his palm as he listened to yoongi’s words.

they had no idea what he was doing to you underneath the table.

his fingers would work against the buttons on your jeans. it would surprise you how quickly he’d be able to unfasten them.

it would take just a few strokes of his fingers against your clit to have you squirming.

you bit at your lips, trying to keep your moans inside as you concentrated on the conversation in front of you.

when tae would apply more pressure to your nub, your hand would reach down to grasp his wrist.

“i have to use the bathroom!” you’d announce, earning weird glances from the people at the table.

moments later, the bathroom door would push open.

you’d be half surprised to see tae’s head of red hair peaking around the door. “you good?” his smirk said it all.

“i’m great.” you mocked. he’d roll his tongue over his lower lip as he stepped further into the bathroom, flicking the door locked behind him.

“come here,” he’d mumble, his index finger tilting your head up. tae would cover your lips with his mouth, easily pushing his tongue through.

the kiss would quickly grow heated, his hands dropping down to feel your ass. the sound of your moan only urging him on.

with a swift movement, he’d turn your body around, easily behind you over the counter.

his hands would tug your jeans down while you’d squirm, desperate to feel him.

tae would waste no time with freeing his dick from his pants, shoving your panties to the the side and sliding deep inside of you.

JUNGKOOK

the second the door would push closed paired with the last sounds of the hyung’s goodbye, jungkook would jump to close the space between you.

his lips would find yours, taking your mouth in aggressively.

you’d laugh at his eagerness, your hands finding his chest to push him back slightly. “what’s with you?”

“what’s with you?” he’d repeat, leaning back to trail his eyes over your body. “how do you expect me to keep my hands to myself while you’re dressed like that?”

you’d take a moment to look over your outfit. it was hot, so you wore shorts and a tank. you had no idea it would effect him like this.

jungkook would move forward once again, this time his lips landing on your neck, his hands finding your ass.

one thing you weren't’ ever able to resist was the way jungkook kissed our neck. he knew it too.

it also wasn’t a secret how you were always ready for him.

 “what if they come back?” your words were rushed and you barely listed for the answer as you peeled his shirt from his body.

jungkook would shrug, dragging your shorts down your legs. “we got to be fast.”

your lips would meet hungrily, your hands moving to the front of his jeans to unbuckle his belt.

your hands would be fast with sliding underneath his boxers, wrapping around his hardened member before pulling it out.

he’d groan at the feeling of our warm palm against his skin. “fuck,” he’d hiss.

you’d giggle, covering your mouth with yours once again while positioning yourself over him.

jungkook would react instantly to your tightness swallowing him. his head drawn back and his eyes falling closed.

“slow, i won’t last.” he’d warn, making you wonder how long he’d been in this state for.

slowly you’d begin to rock your hips against his, arms hanging off his shoulder and head bowed at his chest.

m.list

#namjoon #namjoon imagine #namjoon smut #namjoon reaction #jin #jin smut #jin imagine #jin reaction #yoongi imagine #yoongi smut #yoongi reaction #yoongi #hoseok #hobi imagine #hobi smut #hobi reaction #jimin imagine #jimin smut #jimin #jimin reaction #taehyung imagine #taehyung #taehyung smut #taehyung reaction #jungkook imagine #jungkook #jungkook smut #jungkook reaction #bts #bangtan boys

[bapyess1r]

Amphetamine

WARNINGS: you already know lol

Chapter 2

Talia’s POV

I was awakened by the sound of live music being played in the distance. I winced a bit as I looked over the clock. 9:30 AM. ‘Are they practicing already?’ I thought with a groan as I sat up. I scratched an itchy spot under my messy bun and stood to crack the bones in my back. Stretching my arms, I made my way to the bathroom. I almost startled myself as I noticed my swollen eyes and dried drool in the corner of my mouth. I had to fix it. I briefly adjusted my nose ring before ridding myself of the large tee shirt and began my shower. I took a deep breath as I stepped into the hot water, basking in the pleasantness of the morning sun coming through the windows. I could hear some solos being played from the shower and began to imagine Sam with his guitar in hand. I grinned, actually excited for the night ahead. Then I remembered him pointing a pistol at me and pouted a bit. I couldn’t just forget about that. What started off to be a great morning suddenly turned dull from the thought. I changed into a black AC/DC crop top (cut off purely because I was bored), white cargo pants fitted to every curve, and beat up black converse, the laces wrapped around my ankles. I combed my hair and put on a fair amount of makeup, thick black wings lining my eyes and lashes not too long. ‘Don’t wanna fly away and shit…’ I thought with a brief guffaw. I left the bathroom, drying my hair a bit more with my towel as my Godmother left from the kids room carrying her baby boy. The youngest of her three.

“Good morning, night owl! I was afraid you weren’t gonna wake up in time, you were up and out so late.” She laughed.

“I know! I’m sorry! I hung out with the band for a while after practice- hey baby!” I was distracted by their youngest daughter, Ava, who walked up to me with open arms in hopes to be picked up. Of course I did. She wrapped her arms around me as I sat her up on my hip, continuing the conversation as I followed my Godmother to the kitchen. “And that Sam guy came back so there’s that….”

“Oh yeah?” She smoothed a blonde strand of hair behind her ears as she put JJ in his baby booster seat.

“Yeah. I spooked him on accident but he was really nice about it.” I told her, skipping over the part about the gun as the baby gave me a big juicy gummy smile as he laughed joyfully. ‘Oh to be that carefree again…’ I thought with a smile as I turned on Disney jr for the kids and started on breakfast.

“Oh so you’ve met him already?” She began to grab bowls and spoons for the kids before walking to the kitchen, passing me as I made way to the stove.

“Yeah. He’s kinda cute for an old guy.” I smirked.

“He is good lookin’, right?” She whispered to me with a girlish grin, hoping her husband hadn’t heard. It was adorable. “Are you gonna play with the band tonight?”

“Well I was but he wants to play with just them tonight since it’s been a while. I’m gonna play next weekend.” I prepared to make bacon and eggs as she poured cereal on the booster seat tray and in the bowls for her daughters.

“Well that’s very nice of you, Talia.” She sounded proud of me. But I was honestly just being courteous.

“I wanna go see Sam!” The oldest of the three, Mariah said, waving her spoon in the air as she smiled at her mother.

“You’ll get to see him tonight when they play tonight, sweetie! You guys wanna go hear some music before bedtime tonight?” And with that, the girls cheered. “James gets off early today so you won’t have to worry about watching the kids tonight.” She said to me.

“Thank you! Because I had not a clue about how I was gonna watch the three of them and prepare for the block party.”

“Did you need me to ask your Godfather to stop somewhere and grab anything?”

“I may need some ice. Possibly some lighting fluid for the grill. Marcel is gonna grill what I prepare. And then Louie and Jules were gonna go purchase the alcoholic beverages…” I wiggles my eyebrows thinking of how absolutely trashed I planned on being tonight. And my friend from New York was supposed to come down and visit as well. Remembering that- “SHIT- I mean….dang…” I switched up my language, remembering I was in the company of children. “I forgot I have to pick up Anna from the airport! I’m gonna have to pick her up.”

“Do you need the car seats for the kids? I can set them out for you when you get ready to go.” She asked as I scooped up all of what I cooked into a plate with a piece of toast.

“That would be great! Now… I’m gonna take my breakfast to my spot on the docks and consume a bit of Can- Do- Nicotine.”

“Ok. I can take care of them til you’re done but then I gotta go to hospital.”

“Will do!” I hollered, grabbing my cigarettes and lighter on the way out the door.

As I exited into the driveway, I could hear the band practicing behind closed doors. I bobbed my head to what I thought might’ve been Orange Crush by R.E.M. It sounded almost exact. I sat down with my legs hanging off the ledge of the docks and lit my cigarette, ready to relax and consume breakfast. But then they stopped playing. “Booooo!” I said to myself in disappointment. I wanted to catch Sam singing; guess I missed it. I took a healthy drag and it wasn’t too long before he found himself outside with me.

“Y’know I definitely recall finding this smoke spot a long time ago.” He said and I turned with a large grin. He was decked out in a tight white v neck and a bold palm leaf printed Hawaiian shirt, his eyes hidden behind black shades. He smiled at me as a cigarette dangled from his mouth as he tried to light it against the winds.

“Finders keepers. And you were here to be fair.” I said before scooping the eggs and bacon onto my toast and holding it like a taco, taking a massive bite out of it. With an amused chuckle, he sat down and joined me. “Nice duds.” I gestured to his outfit of choice for the day with a slight look of judgement.

“What- you don’t like this?!”

“I didn’t say all that… It’s just an interesting look.” I giggled, diverting my eyes to the calm morning sea.

“You don’t like it.”

“I…. think there’s better Hawaiian shirts out there. Ones that don’t give off narc vibes.”

“Now I look like a cop?!”

“The shades and the conceal pistol doesn’t help your case either.”

“Wooooooow…..” he said in disbelief causing me to deliver the ugliest laugh. “Speaking of…. I just wanna apologize again for how I reacted to you last night. It was a long night and I’m still a bit jet legged.”

“Where’d you come from?”

“Peru.”

“Oooo what’s in Peru?”

“The Lost Treasure of Lima…” he waved a hand across the horizon of the sea for dramatic effect. Shit, it worked on me. I ooo’d in the background and allowed him to tell me about it. “Captain William Thompson was supposed to be in charge of transporting all of Lima’s riches to Mexíco as they were about to be on the edge of a revolt. He couldn’t resist the temptation of all that money and turned pirate.”

“How did I know this was gonna be about pirates?”

“What can I say? I’m a sucker for a good pirate story.” He smirked before continuing. “Basically, he and his crew were caught by the Spanish, they made a deal that they’d take them to where they ‘allegedly’ buried the treasure, got them as far as Cocos Island which was pretty close to Costa Rica, then split up to divvy the treasure. They managed to escape the jungle and were never seen again. The Spanish still never found the treasure.”

“And you did?” I asked, extremely impressed.

“I did not. Unfortunately.” he replied sourly, taking a drag of his cigarette. “We were close though…”

“What stopped you?” I asked, letting the nicotine fill my lungs. He sighed and began fidgeting with his lighter again.

“Would you believe me if I said we weren’t allowed to hunt there?”

“I see…” I definitely didn’t believe him. He didn’t seem like the type to just stop when he was so close. I began to finish the last few bites of breakfast and lit a second cigarette.

“What are your plans for the day? Seeing as you’re not playing tonight.” He said with a sneaky smirk.

“Go ahead and rub it in.” I joked. “I am preparing a few foods for Marcel to grill after your set.”

“A woman after my own heart!” he dramatically placed a hand on his chest and began fanning himself. I felt comfortable enough to punch him in the arm playfully. “Whatcha cookin’?”

“Devilled eggs, potato salad, chicken salad, kebabs, I have some chicken I managed to marinate before bed last night, burgers, and corn on the cob. And I have YET to start on a good chunk of these things AND I’m watching the kids until my Godfather gets off work. I also have to pick up my best friend from the airport. She’s visiting this weekend.” Just thinking about all of it, I got stressed out all over again.

“Well you do have a lot on your plate. Who’s your Godfather?”

“James Edwards.”

“You’re James’s kid?! Shit. I’m in big trouble.”

“How so?” I asked with a curious smile. He readied his mouth to answer but I could tell he made the decision to change the subject.

“Listen, I’m done rehearsing for the day. I can come over and help with the kids while you cook and run n’ grab your friend.” he offered. I looked at him with so much hope.

“Oh my god would you really?”

“Yeah! I love those kids! I kinda missed 'em since I’ve been gone.”

“So you’re close with my Godfamily then.”

“James and Barbs are good pals of mine. They never mentioned you to me not once.”

“I just moved here a month ago. I guess right before you left-” Just then I was interrupted by my Godmother’s call. “That’s my cue.” I began gathering my plate and ashed out my cigarette, he did the same.

“I’ll come with.” He smiled. For some reason, my stomach lurched and I became really nervous about it. If we were going to work together on the band, I was going to have to get used to it. He hopped up from his spot and offered a hand to me. With ease he pulled me up and grabbed the plate out of my hand to trash it for me as I walked towards the gate. Still, he beat me to it and opened the gate for me, gesturing to the entrance all corny-like. “Ladies first.” he said rather smoothly. I took an exhausted deep breath and brushed by him quickly, not allowing him to see my burning red face. “Howdy, Barbs!” He greeted my Godmother as she rushed to her car but stopped to hug him briefly and hand me JJ. “Hey, slugger.” He poked the baby in his little pudgy tummy and I smiled.

“Hey Sam! I heard you got in last night! We missed ya around here. Been too quiet.” she said opening the door to get in her silver accord.

“I’ll take the compliment.” he chuckled heartily. “So just a heads up, I’m gonna help Talia with the kids while she cooks and runs her errands.”

“That’s sweet- are you sure? I know you just got home.”

“Nah, I’m well rested and ready to get this show on the road. It’s no problem, really.”

With that she sighed. “Well the kids will be happy to see you, that’s for sure.” she quickly checked her watch before turning her attention to me. “Now, I gotta go. They’ve eaten breakfast. Just let ‘em play for a while, give them lunch, put them down for a nap. They should be good to go until James gets home.”

“Got it.” I nodded before she winked at me and smiled at Sam as he closed the car door for her. Sending her off with two heavy pats to the hood of the car.

He followed me into the cool air conditioned house and with a sigh he took off his bold hawaiin shirt and wiped the sweat off his face with it before hanging it on the back of one of the bar stools. As soon as the kids saw him they screamed their heads off swarming him. “AYE! There’s the little princesses!” He shouted, scooping them both up into his big arms. A man with kids was easily one of the most attractive things on the planet and he was really doing it for me. My thoughts were interrupted by a sharp tug on my hair. JJ had grabbed a fistful and tried to eat it.

“Lord, child….” I grunted as I tried to pry my hair out of his strong little baby hands. JJ just giggled at my struggle. “I love you, but you’re a pain!” I said kissing his forehead.

“Are you gonna stay to play, Sammy?” Mariah asked him, sweetly.

“I sure am, sweetheart.” he winked at her and she hugged his neck tighter.

‘Christ, that adorable!’ I thought as I walked over to him to give him JJ.

“Alright kiddies, while I’m doing a bit of cooking, you guys are gonna hang out with ‘Sammy’.” I said, emphasizing his little nickname to tease causing him to dart his eyes my way. I winked at him and backed away into the kitchen. “Have fuuunnn….” I sang as I stalked off. And with the kids outta the way I began to prepare for tonight's shindig. Just when I was getting started, I got a text on my phone from my best friend Anna.

Anna: I’m in the air, should be there in a few hours!

Me: get off the phone! Ur in a fucking aircraft!

Anna: well fine! Be that way bish! <3

Me: see you in a bit! Lol

#samuel drake #sam drake #samuel drake x reader #sam drake x reader #sam drake smut #uncharted 4 #uncharted #uncharted x reader #sam drake fanfiction

[calpalirwin]

According to Plan

A/N: It’s the finale y’all!

And away, and away we go!

~~~

Chapter 15

Madison

~~~

It felt so good to have Ashton back. I think we were both a little taken aback by the ease we each felt- as if nothing had ever changed.

I watched from the porch as he chased Jude around the backyard, like he had never not done it.

“I hope you like mac and cheese and chicken tenders. I don’t get to make anything more sophisticated these days,” I told him later, after he agreed to stay for dinner.

He let out a small laugh. “It’s fine.”

I smiled. I loved being able to hear his voice and his laugh. Jude had his same laugh: a little high-pitched giggle. I loved that. My boys. 

Jude came running into the kitchen, cutting off anymore conversation.

The dinner conversation consisted of Jude rambling about his toddler adventures, with me stepping in to correct his wording (for all of our benefit) or provide more detail for Ashton. His told Ashton about how his favorite animal was a dinosaur, especially the raptor from that one movie (Jurassic World, I told Ashton) even if it was a little scary (Nightmares, I winced at the memories). And of course, they both talked about soccer.

After dinner, I sent Jude down the hall to pick the pajamas he wanted to wear after his bath. He ran off and came back with soccer pants and a dinosaur shirt. “That’s what you want to wear?” I asked, as Ashton and I tried not to laugh at the clearly clashing attire.

“Yep!” was the hearty reply.

I shrugged and went to get his bath ready. We sat in the hallway outside the bathroom as he splashed around in the water. “I’ve missed this,” I said, almost sadly after a quick peek on our son.

“Bath time?” Ashton asked, incredulously.

“No,” I shook my head. “This. You. Doing everyday things with you. I didn’t know how much I missed it until now.”

He wrapped his arm around me and kissed my head. “I’ve missed it, too.”

“God, I love being able to hear you,” I said, leaning into him.

“Me too.”

After a few more splashes in the bathroom and stolen kisses in the hallway, I got Jude out of the tub and into bed. 

Ashton leaned in the doorway as I crawled into Jude’s bed with him, and grabbed a book. I read the book to Jude as his eyelids grew heavy with sleep, using a different voice for every character. When I finished, I closed the book, and looked at him, already asleep. “Night, Judder-bug. Momma loves you,” I whispered, kissing him and then carefully making my way out of the room. I flicked on a nightlight and turned off his lamp before gently closing the door behind her.

“You’re an amazing mom,” Ashton told me, kissing me softly.

“You caught us on a good day,” I whispered, kissing him back.

We made our way to the living room. “Do you want something to drink?” I asked. “I think Mike has a case of beer. Or do you still not drink?”

He laughed, “Beer’s fine.”

I disappeared for a minute and came back with two bottles. I handed one to him and took a sip of mine. “There used to be a time when you didn’t like to drink,” I remembered.

He shrugged and took a swig, wincing. “Still not my favorite, but I’ll have a beer every now and then. What about you? I didn’t take you for a drinker.”

“I’m not,” I said, taking another drink. “It’s root beer,” I laughed at my joke. He looked at his label as I continued to laugh. “Yours is real,” I told him, “don’t worry.”

He laughed with me, there in the dark, as we each drank our drinks. “So, I’ve been thinking,” he said, as he finished up his beer, spinning the bottle in his palm. “I want a relationship. With Jude obviously, but you as well. We didn’t end on a bad note, hell we barely ended at all. So, if you’re willing, I want to at least try to be a family.”

“I’ve waited a long time for you to say those words, and to actually hear them.” I told him, putting my bottle down.

“I told you I’d always love you,” he shrugged.

“You also promised you’d find someone who made you happy.”

“I did. I found two people who make me happy, actually.”

“Okay,” I smiled at him. “If that’s what you want, sure.”

“It’s not a matter of what I want. It’s a matter of what I need.” He pulled me into his lap and was about to kiss me, when Jude came into the room, tears in his eyes

“Judder-bug,” I said, getting out of Ashton’s lap and going to him. “What’s wrong?”

He pushed me away and crawled into Ashton’s lap. Without a second thought, Ashton wrapped Jude in his arms and started rubbing his back. “Shh,” I heard him soothe, “it’s okay, bud, I’m here. You’re safe, I got you.” Ashton continued to rub Jude’s back and soothe him as Jude’s cries subsided and he fell back asleep.

“Does that happen a lot?” he asked me after he had carried Jude back to bed and kissed him goodnight and he curled up next to me on the couch. 

“Sometimes,” I admitted. “More so now since we moved. He’s still getting used to having his own room. That was the quickest I’ve seen him calm down.”

“Yeah?”

I nodded against me. “I thought because he was still young, that not having you around wouldn’t make much of a difference. But, I guess sometimes you just need your dad. I’m really sorry I kept you in the dark.”

“It’s okay,” he said, kissing me. “We’re together now, that’s all that matters.”

We talked well into the night. I told him how I had found steady work at a local photo studio, so I was staying put. He told me he had steady work at the shop with his dad. We debated about whether it made more sense for us to find our own place or if he should just move in with me. We ultimately decided that he would move in, because Mike was still planning on moving out. “I know it’s not the apartment at Duke we always talked about,” I said.

“No, it isn’t,” he admitted, laughing. “It’s way better.”

When we finally made it to my room, we still didn’t sleep, both of us too busy making up for lost time.

Ashton slowly moved in over the course of the week, while Mike slowly moved out. Throughout the week, while Ashton formed a bond with Jude, Ashton and I reformed ours. Both of us were glad to see that the love was still there. Friday night, it was just the three of us, our small little family. We laughed as we went to bed that night, still in a daze at how fast our lives had changed.

~~~

Chapter 16

Ashton

~~~

A week after Madison and I found each other in that diner, I decided it was time to take her and Jude to my parents’ house. My family knew that we were back together and I had given up my apartment to move in with her, but I still hadn’t told them about Jude. I didn’t want them to react badly, so I was nervous as we drove over there for lunch.

“Not Nana and Papa’s,” Jude said as we pulled into the driveway.

“No, it’s not,” Madison agreed. “It’s Daddy’s parents’ house.”

Jude frowned. His face said everything I was feeling- that this could all go horribly wrong.

I knocked on the front door before letting myself in, closing the door behind Jude and Madison. “Hey, I’m here!” I announced as we made our way to the kitchen where my mom and sister were.

“Ash!” my mom exclaimed coming to hug me, like she didn’t see me practically every day.

“Hey, Mom. You remember Madison,” I said.

“Of course. Madison, it’s so good to see you,” she smiled.

Madison nodded politely.

“Madison, you remember my sister, Lauren,” I introduced.

“You’re so much older now!” Madison marveled. It was true, Lauren was only 10 when Madison first met her. Now Lauren was going to be a sophomore in high school.

Mom and Lauren looked at me questioningly. Madison noticed and explained. “I got the Cochlear implant a few years ago. It’s working very well.”

Mom and Lauren smiled, happy for her. “And who’s this?” my mom asked, crouching down next to Jude.

“This is Jude,” I explained, “our son.”

In complete southern charm, my mother’s eyes went wide and she chose her words carefully, to hide her surprise and probable anger. ”Lauren, why don’t you take Madison and Jude outside so Jude can play,” my mom smiled, as my sister eagerly took Jude’s hand and went outside, Madison following after them.

“A son, Ash?” my mother whispered furiously as she walked out of the kitchen and towards my dad’s office. “That boy… you saw fit not to tell us?”

“It’s a complicated story, Mom,” I said, following her.

“You best get to explaining yourself,” she said, rapping on the door and walking into the office.

“Oh, Ash! Good, you’re he- wait, what’s going on?” my dad asked, once he took a good look at my mom’s face.

“Oh, wait’ll you hear this,” my mom tsked.

I rolled my eyes. “Remember how I said I got 2 messages from Madison right after I left for Duke? Turns out she was pregnant.”

“Pregnant? And she…?”

“Yeah. I have a son, Dad.”

“How long have you known?” came the obvious, but incredibly stupid question.

“Not that long, obviously. I never messaged her back. I found out last week when I found her at the diner.”

“So, she didn’t see fit to tell you for four years?”

“She knew I wouldn’t have stayed at Duke if I’d known. She didn’t want me to give up Duke for her. Especially since I kinda dumped her for it, y’know.”

“And you’re sure he’s yours?”

I clenched my hands into fists and screwed my eyes shut, trying to control my anger. Of all people, my dad should understand what I was going through. And he had the audacity to ask if Jude was mine? Of course he was mine. 1.) Madison would never do something like and 2.) Jude looked just like I did at that age. I unclenched my fists and opened my eyes again as I started talking. “Did it ever matter that I’m not biologically yours? No. You raised me like your own. I’m doing the same thing. Look, I’m not asking for your support or permission. She’s the only girl I ever loved, and he’s my son- biologically and otherwise, trust me- There’s no option where I’m not with them anymore; there’s no option where I don’t love them with all I have. You taught me that.”

My mom and dad smiled at me, my dad not-so-stealthily wiping at his eyes. “Alright,” he choked out. “Let’s go meet…”

“Jude,” my mom told him. “Our grandson’s name is Jude.”

~~~

Epilogue

Madison

May 2025

~~~

“Get the bubbles, look!” I heard Ashton say from the back porch as he blew more bubbles. It still took my breath away every time I heard his voice. It was just as I had always pictured- just as good as he looked.

“Bubbles!” our daughter cheered as she tried to catch them in her little hands.

“Look, Savannah,” Jude told her, blowing a big bubble for his little sister.

Her green eyes danced and her brown curls bounced as she twirled around in childlike wonder. “Momma, look!” she told me, spotting me in the doorway.

“I see,” I answered, sitting down with them.

“Hey,” Ashton smiled, wrapping his arm around me.

“Hey,” I smiled back, leaning into him and breathing him in. A marriage and a second child later, and I still couldn’t get over the amazement. After all these years, I still felt as safe in his arms as I did for the first time at seventeen.

We sat there on the porch, watching our kids play with reckless abandon. “Did you ever think we’d make it this far?” he whispered.

“You and our family are the best things I never planned for.”

#according to plan #chapter 15 #chapter 16 #epilogue #finale! #thanks for reading! #ashton irwin #5sos #galcal irwin

[artificialqueens]

Elastic Heart - Part 4 (Branjie) - Mia Ugly

A/N: Things are heating up. A bit. Like at least a simmer. 

Brock was an emotional child. He said it on the show and it’s the truth. Growing up, he was labeled “too sensitive,” the little boy who rescued spiders instead of stomping them, who cried over books (don’t even get him started on Where the Red Fern Grows) and was quiet at birthday parties. It didn’t take him long as a teenager to realize that being that sort of person was not okay at all (what are you GAY or something?), and so brick by brick, he built walls. 

You keep walls up long enough and you start to think they’ve always been there. That you’ve always been a private person, the kind that would make a joke instead of acknowledging a shared pain.  The kind that would force a smile while the world was ending.

You start to think, maybe, you were born with those walls around your heart.

Maybe the walls are your heart.  

But Brock knows that even brick doesn’t last forever. In Toronto you’d see the old buildings starting to crumble in the winter, damaged by water that froze and cracked their foundations.  Brick walls can chip, can shatter.  Brock’s spent his twenties and early thirties in perpetual maintenance because he knows (he knows) you let a little bit of emotion through, you lose a little bit of self-control, and you lose everything.

Sometimes he feels an odd sort of - not jealousy exactly, but something hungry around queens like Yvie, queens that can go places, be self-righteous and furious and vulnerable, without falling completely to pieces.  Queens like Silky who can rage and shout and then move on like the storm never came.

Queens like Vanjie.

Episode 6 is a tough watch. Vanjie crying in the werkroom is physically painful, and Brock puts on a brave face, smiles for his friends and does not let his walls down. He can’t afford to.

Episode 7 is tough in a different way. It’s beyond uncomfortable watching himself talk about personal things on television, hard not to feel like the worst sort of demure Canadian stereotype.  He watches Untucked at an after-after-party, and that’s even worse. Everyone seems to love his stupid face, mugging for the fucking camera (and he remembers being a little buzzed but nowhere near as drunk as the world seems to think he is.  Those cocktails are more than half ice and probably watered-down vodka anyway.)

More than that, though, is the sight of Vanjie. He hates the way her eyes go dark with surprise and injury after Yvie calls her out. He hates the argument that follows. He even hates the sight of himself building a fucking pillow-fort (incredible legs aside, he’s not blind). It seemed funny enough at the time but now - not so much.

Sometime around 2 am, his phone rings. 

Brock is not asleep. He fumbles for a moment on the side table, forgetting briefly that he’s in a hotel and not in his own bed. (He’s always in a hotel these days.  And that’s fine.  It’s fine.) 

“‘lo?”

“Hi mama.”

Breathe in.  Hold.  Breathe out.

“Hi papi.”

There is music in the background, dulled slightly but still Brock can make out the thump of a DJ, the thunder of a dancefloor. Jose must be in the dressing room of a club. 

Brock imagines him, shining with sweat after a show, out of heels but still in lip gloss.  If he closes his eyes he can see him, an image distorted by fantasy and loss, bright strokes of crimson oil-paint. 

“How you doing?” Jose asks and Brock swallows down a million replies that are too painful to say. 

Instead - because he bottles up his feelings like a normal person - he says “Good.” (There are walls around his heart, and they are wrapped in thorns.) “Good. How are you?”

“I’m good.” 

Both of them breathe together, and it’s simultaneously too intimate and too distant. The last time they spoke - the last time Brock heard this voice there were tears in his eyes and bile in his mouth and ashes all over the runway - 

“Good,” he says stupidly, and Jose laughs. 

It’s a brittle sort of laugh, but Brock still  wishes to God he hadn’t heard it.  Jose’s laugh is something deadly, a poison-tipped arrow straight to the heart.  

“Just watching the show tonight, girl. Thought I’d give you a call.”

“Okay.” Brock hesitates to respond, certain he’s going to fuck this up.  It’s the first time in months he’s got Jose on the phone; fucking it all up is the only possible option. 

“It’s a trip, hey, seeing it on TV. Feels like I’m watching someone else.”

“Yeah,” Brock says.  Fuck, he’s really cementing those accusations of having no personality. Say something. Say something.

But he doesn’t. There is too much unsaid between them, all those words stacking up behind Brock’s teeth when he tries to speak, his throat when he tries to swallow. He’s imagined this conversation too many times to count, and now all he can do is listen in silence to the sound of Jose’s breathing, still audible over the music that’s pulsing like a heartbeat in another room.

“Loved you on Untucked, making all them faces. Must’ve been hard listenin’ to me go off in the background, feelin’ so embarrassed.”

“I wasn’t –“

“Gotta build a pillow fort to hide in or some shit.  Real hilarious. Real comedy queen.”

“It wasn’t like that,” Brock interrupts, but now that he thinks about it – he can see how it might have looked that way.  And he knows Jose was feeling sensitive already about that night, can remember the moment afterwards in his hotel room (“I wanna be better than that,” and his hand on Jose’s throat, sparks flying from their lips, his tongue -) 

Stop.

He can’t think about that right now.

“Whatever,” Jose says at last.  He sounds exhausted. “I’m not coming for you. Sorry, I’m working too much, not sleeping. You know how we do. I’m kinda fading out.”

He sighs, and Brock swears he can feel the ghost of that sigh against his neck. It raises goosebumps all up the length of his arms, his shoulder blades.

“Where are you?”

“NYC, baby. Where you at?”

Brock almost doesn’t want to tell him. “Saskatoon, Saskatchewan.”

“The fuck - that ain’t a real place.”

“Swear to God.  It’s in Canada.”

“Ha, now that explains it. Didn’t know you got cell service up there, in your igloos or whatever.”

“You are such a dick.”

“Don’t lie, girl, we know you love -” Jose stops himself. Brock can basically hear the smile sliding off his face. 

He’d forgotten how easy it was, when it was just the two of them.  Forgotten how fast he could fall.

“Anyway, um.” Jose clears his throat.  “I called because of all this online shit – I shoulda said before – it ain’t me. I didn’t want you to think - cuz I’m not postin’ shit right now, and –"

“Wait. What?”

“Yeah, I shoulda told you sooner. My manager’s paying someone for it, some toddler or something, right? I know we’re s’posed to be all nasty for the fans but it just –“

“It’s not me either,” Brock says quickly. “Someone else is writing it.”

There’s a short silence on the other end of the line. Then Jose laughs again, warm and real this time (Brock has to put out a hand to steady himself even though he’s lying down.)

“Girl, what? I didn’t know that! That’s crazy! Meanwhile I’m feeling so – all these queens tonight were reading me for it, and I was like ‘bitch, mind your business!’ This is some kinda twisted.”

Brock laughs too, helplessly. This whole situation is so fucking ridiculous, it’s unbelievable.

He’s riding the high of Jose’s laughter, feeling like he can breathe for the first time in months, and that’s the only reason he says: “It’s good to hear your voice.” 

Jose stops laughing.  

There is silence again, only broken by the bass thumping in the background. Brock thinks about how quickly he could be in New York if he caught a standby flight.  If Jose asked him - 

Say something, Brock. Fuck’s sake, say something.

“Thought you’d’ve heard enough of it by now.” Jose’s gone a bit quiet.  Brock wonders if he has that crease on his forehead that means he’s upset. Wishes he could smooth it away with the pad of his thumb.

“That will never happen.” He can’t imagine a world where that voice doesn’t do something to him, doesn’t wake up some hidden place that hasn’t seen sunshine in years. “Jose -”

The music suddenly gets louder, and there’s another voice in the background. Jose says something that Brock can’t quite hear.  Someone else laughs.

“Shit, girl, I gotta go. You be good now. I’ll -“ Jose cuts himself off abruptly. Brock waits. Waits. The rest of the sentence never comes, but Jose doesn’t hang up. Brock hears him swear under his breath.

It shouldn’t be like this, Brock wants to scream into the phone. You knew me.  You knew me once.  You left glitter on my pillow.

“Can I call you?” he asks instead. “Later. Or whenever. Just to –” He suddenly doesn’t know how to finish that sentence.

“To?”

“Plan,” is the first word that comes into his head. “Plan - for that episode.  Like, how we’re going to react.  What we should say.”

“Oh.” Jose takes a deep breath. “Sure, yeah. I gotta go, Brock. You – call me later.”

“Okay. Um. Try to get some sleep.” 

“Not much chance of that, girl. But what ya gonna do?”

The call ends. Brock closes his eyes.

The sudden silence feels heavy on his chest, like one of those weighted blankets Nina’s always telling him to get.  He puts his phone to the side. With his eyes closed he can still see that back-room in the club, Jose taking off his lashes, rolling his shoulders. Brock can almost feel sore muscles beneath his hands, and his fingers twitch against his sheets.

Oh if you were mine. 

That’s from a song, right? He can’t remember which one, but it runs in his head as he doesn’t sleep, over and over like a pinwheel spinning.

(And Brock doesn’t know it now, can’t feel it, but somewhere in the walls he’s built, a crack is starting to form.  

It spreads through his foundation, shifting it just slightly.  Not enough that anyone would notice.  

Not yet.)

* * *

The night after Farm to Runway, Brooke is wired and awake and trying unsuccessfully to get into a trashy thriller that her mom leant her - when there’s a knock at her door. 

She doesn’t know what to expect  when she opens it. Maybe a P.A. with a note from Vee, maybe a producer about to institute a strict “one-cocktail-per-Untucked” limit. 

She’s not expecting Vanessa herself, wearing shorts and a loose t-shirt, looking more nervous than Brooke’s ever seen her.

“Hey mama. Can I come in?”

“Uh -”

Behind Vanjie, a little baby-lesbian with a badass haircut and Harry Potter glasses gives a short nod.  

“This is Maya, she’s real sweet, she said we got five minutes. Bye Maya!” Vanjie steps through Brooke’s doorway, shutting it behind her.

“Holy shit.” Brooke just stares at her for a moment. “You’re breaking all the rules now, huh.”

“Yeah, just call me muthafucking Willam. This your digs, huh? Shoulda known you’d be crazy tidy. Bitch, you even got shit hanging in the closet? GIRL. You hang up your t-shirts? My Abuela woulda loved you, for real.”

The hyperactive and adorable narration isn’t totally abnormal for Vanjie and yet - something about it strikes Brooke as odd tonight. Uneasy. 

“So - you came here to check out my room?”

“Nah, I just. Thought I’d come see ya. Didn’t get much chance to - to -” Vanjie’s  hands flutter through the air, restlessly. “Wanted to talk in the van but you know, with Big Silky around, there’s not much chance of that.”

“Okay…” Brooke sits down on the edge of her bed. Vanjie can’t seem to stop moving, shifting from one foot to the other. “What did you want to talk about?”

“All that, you know, shit this evening.” The corner of Vanjie’s mouth twitches up. “Thought maybe you’d be feeling some kinda way about it.  About me.”

So that’s what this is. Brooke follows the movement of Vanjie’s hands - pulling at a sleeve, ruffling her hair, twisting together like rope.

“I don’t -”

“Don’t say nothing, lemme finish. I don’t know why it got so real tonight, fucking Yvie coming for me  - but I’m not getting into it again, she has her own shit to deal with and we’re gonna - we’ll be good. But I clocked the way you were looking at me, there was a moment there - and I thought I had to tell you, you know, that I don’t do that shit on the regular. That’s not me.”

“Wait - you don’t have to apologize or -”

“I don’t wanna be that bitch. You know, I’ve been that bitch before, and I wanna be better than that.”

“Vanjie,” Brooke stands back up, stepping across the room and stopping the movements of Vanjie’s hands with her own. 

Vanjie immediately looks up at her, tilting her jaw back like it’s a challenge.  

Her fingers are warm. They slide gently against Brooke’s. 

“I like the way you are,” Brooke says, and Vanjie does that odd, slanted smile that Brooke’s seen so many times in the werkroom, the one that makes something spark and stutter in Brooke’s chest. 

“Who wouldn’t?  I mean -” Vanjie does a little shimmy but doesn’t let go of Brooke’s hands. And self-deprecating is not really something Brooke thought she’d see in this queen, but that’s what this feels like.  Whether the girl is shimmying or not.

“Yes, we all know you’re fucking gorgeous. But I don’t just mean - that.” Brooke’s throat is getting tight, and she flashes back to her conversation with Ru that afternoon (talking about serious things always makes me cry.  It gives me anxiety just thinking about it.) 

Fuck.  Congrats Brooke on being the whitest person in Drag Race herstory.

“I mean.  I like the way you are.” Brooke releases a breath, and if she gets teary-eyed now she’s going to throw herself off the balcony. She removes one hand from Vanjie’s grasp, lifts it to the side of Vanjie’s face. “Like, all of it.”

Something creases between Vanjie’s brows, a tiny flicker of pain that is instantly smoothed over. She doesn’t say anything for a moment, and then she leans her head into Brooke’s palm. 

“Bitch, why your hands so soft?” Vanessa murmurs, and Brooke drags her other hand up over Vanjie’s throat, and wishes that the world outside that closed door could just go away for one night. Just give them one night alone together, give Brooke one night to touch Vanjie every where she wants to, memorize the freckles on her hips and the ticklish places on her knees and suck her off and hold her close and kiss her until she was drunk with it, kiss her until

- you know what, fuck it.

Brooke hauls Vanjie up, off the ground and into her arms. Vanjie laughs low and rough as she wraps her legs around Brooke’s hips, and Brooke walks them backwards until Vanjie is pressed against the hotel room wall and they are kissing, mouths open and hot and wet. 

When their hips grind together, it feels like a gun going off. Brooke’s knees are shaking already.

Vanjie uses her tongue like it’s a weapon, kisses as demanding as her personality, and Brooke’s never felt like this, never. This isn’t a quick peck in the werkroom or backstage lounge, this is finally getting Vanjie where Brooke wants her, finally getting her alone. 

“Will you fuck me?” Vanjie pulls back, eyes dazed and lips swollen.  “I want you to, I been thinking about it -”

“Oh my god,” Brooke whispers, because yes to that, right now that is the only thing she wants in the whole world. 

Vanjie’s hands are on Brooke’s t-shirt, pushing it up as she scrapes her teeth along the edge of Brooke’s jaw.  Brooke frees one of her hands to fist it in Vanjie’s hair, tilting her head back so their mouths meet again.

“You gotta,” Vanjie says, “Please. I can’t stop wanting it.” 

“Okay.” Brooke’s beyond reason at this point, can’t think about anything except the warm body writhing against hers and how to get them both naked as soon as fucking possible.

A knock at the door makes them both freeze. 

Their eyes meet in horror - like they’re teenagers whose parents have come home too early - before the absurdity of the situation hits them both at the same time, and they start giggling like idiots. 

“Start the clock, bitch!” Vanjie yells, and Brooke snorts with laughter, and then they’re kissing again, smiling against each other’s lips. Brooke waits for reality to kick in, hoping it will take its time.

But it doesn’t (the knock at the door comes again, slightly more insistent.)

“Damn it.  Okay. Okay. Just -” Brooke reluctantly lowers Vanjie to the floor, both of them moaning at the delicious slide of contact between their bodies. “I’m not getting us kicked off Drag Race.”

“It’d be worth it, baby,” Vanjie purrs, batting her eyelashes until Brooke has no choice but to lean down and kiss her again, hands winding in her hair, Christ, she tastes like peppermint and cream soda and -

“Wait.  Okay.” Brooke drops her hands, fists clenching. “No, don’t look at me like that. I can’t - “

“Like this?” Vanessa grins all sly and sexy up at her.

“Yes, like -” Brooke has to take a few steps backwards, putting some distance between them while she can. 

“Ugh, you’re a monster, it’s not fair.” Vanjie straightens up her shirt, tries to pat her hair into something less obvious.  “You get to look so fine, and send me packing?” 

“It’ll be worth it,” Brooke says, not certain what she’s talking about.  Worth the wait? Worth the prize? Worth a month in a sparkly warzone shooting glances at each other over sewing machines?  “When I win, I’ll make it up to you.”

“Ha! Fuck that, Mary, you just try it.  You can use some of my money to wipe your tears.”

“Oh my god, you’re such a dick.” Brooke shakes her head, and Vanjie winks.

“Yeah, well, you know you love it.” She crosses to the door. “Night night Brooky Poo.”

Brooke stares after her long after she’s gone, knees still shaking.  

Mouth still sweet as peppermint.

#rpdr fanfiction #brooke lynn hytes #vanessa vanjie mateo #branjie #angst #canon compliant #smut #eventual happy ending #elastic heart #mia ugly #conceit welcome #submission #s11 #on set fic

[itisannak]

His (Ashton Irwin Smut)

Summary: (Y/N) admits on a red carpet interview that she has a celebrity man-crush (other than her secret boyfriend, Ashton). Which makes Ashton's eyes turn green.  Based on Sexual Prompt #36: "You are mine. Do you understand me?"  (Smut / Oral; female receiving) (Request) (Words: 2k)

I look at Ashton who smiles at me across the red carpet; fuck, he looks so good in his silky shirt and styled hair, it makes it hard for me to concentrate on my red carpet interview. "So, no date tonight, (Y/N)?" The interviewer asks me, making me chuckle. "Actually, I have 4 dates tonight. I came with 5sos, but, typically, they ditched me for the cameras." I giggle, pointing their way. "You guys seem close." She states and I nod. "We are. They were kinda the first people I met when I moved to Los Angeles." I smile, my mind flashing back quickly to when I first worked with them. "You've worked with them multiple times in videos. Any chance we will see you in any videos for songs from their newest album?" "Uh, you will have to ask them that." I snicker and bite my lip. "Ooooh, secretive. You are single, right? Any MCMs you are excited about seeing here tonight? Maybe we can help ya, girl... Hook you up." The interviewer gives me a big smile. I shrug my shoulders, feeling my blush already crawling up my cheeks. "Uh... Skeet Ulrich. When my manager told me that the Riverdale actors would be here, I screamed. I've been crushing on the guy ever since I watched Scream. So, if he is seeing this and he is available, I am right here." I giggle awkwardly, bringing my hand to cover my face. "Awww, she is blushing, guys. Skeet, if you are watching this, your girl is right here." The interviewer chuckles and I laugh nervously. "Thank you so much for the interview. Have fun on the award show." The interviewer dismisses me with a hug.

I walk towards the guys' way, smiling and waving screaming fans. The guys are dismissed as well by their interviewers and they seem to pause for a minute and wait for me. I pace faster, holding up my dress and trying not to trip on my high heels. "How did your interview go?" Calum asks me as I approach them. "Like every other red carpet interview. They asked a bit about my projects, who I am wearing tonight, and primarily, about my relationships, especially with you guys." I sigh as we enter the stadium. Calum chuckles as Ashton strokes the back of my hand. "Did you..." "Let anything slip? No Ash, I am not an idiot." I shake my head at him and he nods. "Good. Good girl." He whispers with a wink.

The whole show passes by before my eyes and I am soon found in the afterparty. I try to catch up with some of my co-stars since a whole summer went by without seeing them. Ashton is off to get some drinks and chat a little bit with some of his friends. My eyes keep on traveling back to him, hoping to catch a glimpse of his eyes on me. And of course, I do. His gaze burns my skin, making me feel jittery throughout my conversation with my friends. "Excuse me." I hear someone say from behind me, accompanied by a tap on my shoulder. I turn around to see Skeet, smiling at me. I yelp and cover my face in my hands, trying to calm my beating heart. "You are (Y/N), right?" He asks me, the charming smile still decorating his face. "Yeah. Oh my God, it is so good to meet you." I say in one breath. "It's good to meet you as well. I heard your interview. Well, the part about me. And I have to admit, I am flattered, but I am dating someone currently. But I would love to have you on the Riverdale set someday to hang out." He says, making my heart flutter. "Aww, thank you so much. I am kinda seeing someone currently, but you know, I didn't want to make it public yet, so no need to feel awkward. I would love to visit you on set." I reply, smiling brightly at him. His hand touches my arm lightly in a comforting manner while he responds to the smile. "Great. I will Dm you to talk about the details. Have a great night." He cheers, pulling me into a hug. I feel warm and fuzzy; my teenage crush is hugging me. "You too. Thank you so much for coming over." I coo, hugging him back. "I am so glad to meet you." He chuckles.

I turn back to my friends after Skeet walks away, trying not to feel too embarrassed by their smirking faces. "You should have seen your reaction... You guys looked so cute together." One of them says in a baby voice, making everyone burst out laughing. Before I could react, I feel a hand wrapping around my wrist, pulling me until I am completely turned around. "We need to talk." Ashton hisses through his teeth, his face looking tensed. I watch as his eyes shine under the light, looking darker than their usual green-ish color. "Now?" I ask, almost whispering. "Now." He almost growls, pulling me along as he begins walking.

I feel like everyone is looking at us as he drags me across the teeming room. Ashton pushes me into one of the venue's bathrooms; for a moment, my breath hitches at the thought of it being occupied, but phenomenically, it seems empty. "Are you crazy? Everyone saw us... And what if someone was in here?" I exclaim as he shuts the door. "Do I honestly look like I give a fuck about who saw us or who could have seen us?" He replies, jaw clenching as he turns to look at me. "Are you ok?" I ask again, feeling goosebumps crawl along my skin. "Do I look like I am ok? What did he want from you?" He asks, approaching me. I feel a little intimidated by his attitude, I have barely ever seen him like this. "He came over to say hi." I mumble and watch his eyes shine as he chuckles sarcastically. "And why did you hug him?" He asks me, now a step away from me, standing tall and threatening. "Because I have been a fan of his since I can remember myself." I stutter, stepping back, but soon my back collides with the wall. "More than a fan. You still drool over the guy whenever you see him." He barks at me, face inches away from mine. "Can you calm down? I don't get why you are jealous." I gasp. "Because you admitted that you are crushing on him on camera, and then, a few hours later I see him hugging you. People see him hugging you. Photographers see him hugging you. How is that supposed to make me feel?" He growls. "I don't know how is that supposed to make you feel. Honestly, why would you feel anything about this?" I bark back, making him grumble. "You are dating me. No one should be touching you. You are mine, do you understand me?" He shouts at me, pointing a finger at me. "I am no one's. And if you don't want others to be near me, walk right outside and scream at the top of your lungs that I am yours. I know I would do it in a heartbeat if needed. And I know that you wouldn't, so spare me this whole jealousy outrage and get out of my face." I rumble and his eyes go wide.

"That's it." He shakes head and pushes me into a stall. "What are you doing?" I ask, trying to read him. "You are mine. Just mine." He groans, kneeling down in front of me. His hands are on the hem of my dress, gathering it up in a bunch on my upper thighs. "You are not wearing anything under that, are you?" He asks, hands already reaching for my sex. "Good girl, following daddy's orders and forgetting your undies back home." He says in a throaty whisper. I watch him lick his lip, smirking at me as my face stays straight. "You are so hot when you are mad, princess. But let's see if you can stay mad at me for long." He chuckles teasingly. "What are you doing?" I ask again but in response, Ashton just chuckles and brings his tongue to give my core one long lick. I shudder at the feeling of the wet, slick tongue against my bundle of nerves, causing Ashton to chuckle. "I licked it, so it's mine. You are MINE." He whispers before he uses his hands to spread my legs and gain better access. He sounds ridiculous, but I have to admit that I am fluttered o His tongue runs around my clit, using the tip to outline the bulging nub. My hands fly to his hair, fingers tangling in his short curls as he masterly rolls his tongue on my clit. Ash hums as he uses the flat of his tongue to get to my entrance, which he traces the outline of and before thrusting it in. I release a moan and grip onto his hair even harder. Other than the feeling of his tongue on my hole, the slight feeling of his teeth on my nub of nerves gives me chills, the good kind of ones. His hand creeps up my thigh and I feel his fingers get closer to my core.

His lips attach back to my clit and his tongue on my entrance is replaced by his long fingers. It feels like pure ecstasy is running through my body. He sucks harshly, while his free hand is running up and down my thigh. His fingers pump inside me, every second stroke pressing on my spot. I am a moaning mess standing upon him, trying to control my twitching legs. "Daddy loves it when you do that." Ashton chuckles as he resurfaces for air. His fingers still move inside me, now faster than before. "Ash..." I whimper weakly, rubbing my core against his face as his lips get closer to it. Ashton eats me out eagerly, lightly biting on my bundle of nerves and making me shiver. His breath on my skin makes me clench around his fingers, which are still pumping inside me. "Ashton, I am so fucking close." I almost scream, pulling on his hair as he looks at me from down there. "I know. My face and fingers are covered in your juices." He chuckles, only leaving my clit for a moment. "I fucking hate what you are doing to my body." I groan before my voice gets too high and my body is engulfed by my peek. "Look at that pretty pussy. My pretty pussy." He whispers as his fingers still thrust in me, giving me more of the warm feeling that courses through my body.

Once I get out of my high, Ashton removes his fingers, making me feel empty suddenly. He stands up pressing his body on mine and bringing his fingers to my lips. "Open, princess. Taste how good you taste." He whispers, parting my lips. I swirl my tongue around his digits, not breaking eye contact with him. He looks at me with calm, sparkly eyes, warming my skin as they stay on me. "I adore you. I love you. And when I say you are mine, I don't mean you belong to me, but that you belong with me. And if you need me to tell everyone you are mine and I am yours to validate this, then I'll do it. And I am sorry that I caused this whole scene, I just saw you with him and my mind got fuzzy with anger." "If you are going to eat me out every time you get jealous, I might make you jealous more frequently." I giggle, cupping his face and pulling him into a kiss. "Don't, please. You can just tell me you need your clit in my mouth. Or just spread your legs for me, I'll get the message." He comments, not taking his lips off mine. "Now, are you ready to go tell the world about us?" He asks me, stroking my cheek. "Actually, let's not tell anything. I mean, they will kinda find out, eventually." I reply, biting my bottom lip. Ashton shakes his head, chuckling as he presses his lips on my forehead. "What am I going to do with you..." He chuckles again, opening the stall's door for me.

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