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orikiys · 5 months

Text

✿ ✿ 〞 comparing you to their ex

✰ pairings: ot8 skz x fem!reader

✰ genre: romance, lots of angst

✰ warnings: cussing, skz mentioning reader’s insecurities, skz being red flags, slight mentions of manipulative behaviour, hints at cheating but no cheating, mentions of breaking up ( ikk it’s a lot because i just can’t fathom the fact that it’s been nearly 3 months since i last wrote angst )

✰ word count: 2.6k+ words i will better myself

౨₊ৎ chan

“i don’t get you these days,” you scoff over the call as you remind yourself of the main reason why you even bothered in the first place to get him a tub of ice cream in hopes that when he arrives back home he can rest and dig in.

“there’s nothing to understand babe. i told you that i can’t come home today,” the words slip out of his mouth without hesitation and the tone so casual that it makes you stare at his caller id in disbelief.

“i thought you were in the car on your way home?” you mutter nervously.

“i lied. i didn’t want to worry you plus there’s too much work baby. can you please try and understand that, hmm?”

“this won’t work on me. you lied chan! why would you lie? you could’ve just told me and i wouldn’t have wasted my time setting the couch and deciding on movies and buying you ice creams!” you sigh deeply.

“see? this is why i lied. because i knew you would scream at me when it isn’t even my fault,” you remain silent after hearing his words and there’s still evident clicking of keyboard from the other side.

“why are you trying to put the blame on me? chan it’s fucking 2 am and this is not the first time i had to stay up waiting for you to get back just for you to not come home!”

“who told you to wait? sleep for all i care! at least my ex didn’t bother me like this,” he mumbles but it’s hard not to hear him when your ears are just waiting for any sort of apology, instead they are welcomed with this.

“wow, thank you for telling me your true feelings. make sure you go back to her,” there is sarcasm in your words, but it’s only meant to hide the real fact of how bad it hurt you and maybe he knows it or maybe he doesn’t.

“baby i–” you end the call and before you know it, the tears start to flow down your cheeks.

just when did things go so wrong?

౨₊ৎ minho

he knew how easy it was for you to be overwhelmed. it was unfortunately not that easy to comfort you since nothing would make you feel better. but minho was there. always. he would sit beside you for hours and talk endlessly until a word that escaped his mouth would lift the corner of your lips.

it always felt so much better when you had someone helping you deal with your problems. it reassured you that someone truly did have your back. you couldn’t be any more thankful for having met lee minho.

it had been a few hours since you had locked yourself in your room, call it childish but being alone helped you gather your thoughts. while you sat on the floor with your head in your hands, minho kept banging on the door impatiently.

“open the door! stop being so immature and just open the door!” he yells as he starts to bang harder making you flinch at the action. with a defeated sigh, you get up and unlock the door before coming face-to-face with a flush faced sweaty minho. he stares at you angrily and grabs your wrist a bit too tightly before doing a quick scan of your body for any signs of injuries.

“do you even know how worried i was? gosh how can you even be so careless? i don’t think that i’ve ever seen my ex act that way,” the last part of the sentence is quieter as he trails off when the realisation strikes him.

“say that again,” you say, as if daring him to repeat his words. he looks away before muttering.

“i’ve heated up food for you, go eat it.”

“stop trying to change the topic! i heard you mention her loud and clear,” he groans at your words and looks back at you.

“so what if you heard me? i didn’t mean it and you know it,” he mutters and tries to grab a hold of your hand but you slap his hand before it can touch yours.

“i don’t think so i know it anymore minho. where is the guy i fell in love with? he would think at least a thousand times before saying something as hurtful as this,” you chuckle bitterly and walk past him.

maybe eternally was just a word meant for the world of fiction.

౨₊ৎ changbin

as soon as changbin’s feet crossed the line of the entrance to the apartment, his brows furrowed upon witnessing the messiest house. the smell of stale vegetables made him scrunch his nose in disgust and he covered his mouth with his hand before trying to search for you.

there you were, scrubbing the glass table vigorously and he sighed, “seriously?”

“what?” you look up at him in confusion making him look away.

taking a deep breath he looks back at you, “can i not expect the house to be in safe hands for even a day?”

“binnie it’s not like that i just—“

“i don’t want to hear your excuses anymore! we divided the chores equally then why don’t you do your part properly? i wish my ex had been here,” he spats and before you know it he bumps his shoulder against yours before walking away. not one ounce of regret.

all you wish was to turn back the time.

౨₊ৎ hyunjin

“you’re being dramatic hyunjin. i’ll be fine, besides i have my friends with me,” you try to reassure him but he wouldn’t budge even an inch from his firm decision.

“ the one who flirts with you? that friend?” he scoffs as if you just said something ridiculous.

this wasn’t the first time where hyunjin acted as if his words were meant to be obeyed. but he did very much mind the fact that you trusted some guy over him. no matter how hard you explain, he just finds one or the other way to insult your friend.

“don’t say that! you don’t know him that’s why you say it.”

“ i don’t care! i have no interest in knowing anything about him. don’t you think you’re being a little too carefree around him? i know guys like him pretty well,” he mutters while glancing up at you.

“stop behaving like you know everything!” you yell and glare at him. the remaining patience left in you had all reached the saturation point.

“stop being so damn adamant! that guy is no good! he’s trying to steer us away, if my ex was here she’d choose me over him,” he confesses and you can feel your heart drop and that feeling of suffocation begins to engulf you.

“right now i’d choose him rather than choosing you,” you spat and look away without letting him speak any other word.

perhaps even love marriage no longer reminded you of the good choices.

౨₊ৎ han

“do you think any girlfriend would trust their boyfriend around his ex?” you spoke as you followed him around the apartment as he picked up his things and placed them in his backpack.

“i think yes,” he mutters and glances at you for a second before looking away.

“well i don’t! she’s a manipulator jisung, listen to me! stop believing her lies!” you plead trying to remind him how bad she was.

“babe, you’re clearly exaggerating the situation! she’s just my client and i have to attend to her for today,” he sighs exasperated and rubs his temples in frustration.

“jisung… look i know it’s for your work but tell me how and when did she become your client? because for as long as i know your ex used to be a hairstylist,” you try to convince him to believe you but he does not even give you a glance.

he just sits on the couch with his legs crossed and his left arm rubbing his temples, his eyes are shut and his face is lowered, so you can’t predict what he’s thinking right now.

“babe, she’s my client, that's all i know and all i care. if she wasn’t my ex i’m sure she wouldn’t be that insecure in this situation,” he snapped, annoyance written bold on his forehead as he stared at you. all you could do was bite your lower lip and try not to give in to your mind telling you to cry. you couldn’t be any weaker, could you? you shouldn’t cry on these small things, you try to convince yourself but the way his expression does not falter makes your heart ache a little more.

“wow jisung, you’re so cool for using my weaknesses against me,” you mumble and stare at him blankly. your sentence was formed as if it were a joke, but there wasn’t any smile on your face. he looked up at you expectantly, that you were finally going to let him go.

so you did.

you let him go for good.

౨₊ৎ felix

“why are you doing this?” you sigh as you watch him browse through his wardrobe.

“you’re guilty and you have no right to say that,” he scoffs and continues to search for something particular in his wardrobe.

“where’s my brown hoodie?” he questions, turning around to look at you expectantly. his eyebrows are raised and there’s not the familiar expression of playfulness in his eyes anymore.

you gulp and lean against the wall, trying not to portray that the situation was that serious, “i don’t know,” you shrug and look down at your nails.

“you don’t… know? are you being for real right now?” he snaps and your gaze switches to him.

“stop yelling, i’m standing right in front of you,” you warn him with a defiant look in your eyes.

“fine, sorry. will you please tell me where all my hoodies are?”

“they’re in my wardrobe,” you mumble and watch as his gaze hardens back again, which makes you internally groan. just why were the two of you fighting over this stupid matter?

“babe please! i’ve told you a hundred times that the brown one was my favourite and i don’t like anyone wearing it. if my ex was here she wouldn’t have done this,” he ran a hand through his hair growing frustrated that you both didn’t understand each other.

“look it’s just that i don’t like it when someone does what i clearly told them not to,” he sighs and presses his face in his hands and lets out a muffled groan.

a minute of silence was all that was heard before you took your cue to speak, “it’s just a hoodie lixie, you didn’t have to take it this far,’’ the tears came as quickly as they fell. you had grabbed your coat and bag, heading for the door. you didn't think anything else could hurt you. but you were wrong.

he just stared down at the floor unmoving, he had no clue what to do anymore. all the time he spent courting you, all the flowers he brought you, were they nothing?

౨₊ৎ seungmin

“um, miss? the restaurant will be closing soon, we’re so sorry. would you like us to book you a cab?” you glance up at the waiter and shook your head with a tight smile on your face before heading out.

the night was surely chilly, but you didn’t care. at least not when you dolled up just for kim seungmin to not show up. it was supposed to be a dinner date with just the two of you as it was your third anniversary. three years of the two of you dating. three beautiful years… coming to an end?

you were tired. tired of constantly checking on seungmin just for him to hand up on you. tired of constantly worrying when he’ll come home just for him to say sorry everyday. tired of being played by his lies and broken promises. you were extremely tired and torn apart.

“babe-!” seungmin panted as he jogged up to you, the sight breaking your heart even more. it would’ve been better if he didn’t come looking for you. maybe then your heart wouldn’t hurt to say no to him next time.

“i’m sorry! i came here as soon as i got done,” he huffed and you threw him a quick glance. judging from the way he is breathing heavily he really did.

“clearly,” you mumble and look away, not giving in to him this time.

“baby, my boss held me back. you know how he acts during the end of the month, right?”

“no i don’t. and seungmin stop making excuses. if you wanted to, you could’ve told him or at least informed me? i was sitting in the restaurant for 3 hours looking like a total joke! do you enjoy this? enjoy making me suffer?” you yell and shrug his hand that was on your shoulder.

“don’t be like that, come on. i said i’m sorry. forgive me please?” he mutters and smiles a bit, in hopes you would say yes.

“i’m done with this,” you retort and begin to walk away but halt upon hearing him.

“dammit! i’m a grown ass man and i have a job that pays me! the same job that lets us eat! it’s just one date we can reschedule it next month as well! why do you have to be so stubborn all times? my ex would have more understanding in this situation,” he scoffs and you turn your head to stare at him with bloodshot red eyes.

“why did you have to make me fall in love with you?”

౨₊ৎ jeongin

there’s a soft smile plastered on your face as you knock on the door to jeongin’s dorm along with his members. the two of you had been dating for just over a year now and things were going pretty smoothly.

the door opens and you’re welcomed by felix’s wide grin as he pulls you in, “hey! you’re here!” you nod and give into his enthusiasm before looking around.

“jeongin’s inside,” felix chuckles when he notices you glance around the house, “what are you waiting for? you can go,” you smile sheepishly at his words and glance at the small bag food that you held in your hands before knocking on his door.

jeongin opens the door and you smile up at him but your smile falters when there’s no signs of happiness in his eyes. he just looks tired.

“why are you here?” he questions with eyebrows furrowed as he glances at the box in your hand and then back to you.

“i thought since you didn’t have lunch maybe we can have it together,” you mutter and lift the bag and show it to him but all he does is look at it blankly before scoffing.

“i told you i wanted to be alone!” he whisper yells and glances around the house. with a reluctant sigh he pulls you in the room and closes the door.

“jeongin… i wanted to be there for you baby,” you mumble and still try to muster a smile.

“well i didn’t want that! do you ever listen to anyone except you? i see you everyday! every single day! what else do you want from me? can’t i spend a day without you clinging around? i wish i never broke up with my ex,” he glares accusingly at you and you clutch the bag in your hands tighter as if it would decrease the pain.

“thanks for telling me i guess. at least i’ll know now whether you were faking it or not,” you head for the door before he can say anything.

“i’m sorry–” his words are cut when you leave the room and fling the door close in anger.

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spidybaby · 4 months

Note

Wenasss✨ Not me sneaking into your inbox🤭😅 to kindly ask for Bad Kind of Butterflies part II, please and thanks!🤣🫶🏼

Bad Kind of Butterlies | Part Two

Summary: Pedri regrets his actions and tries to get back to you.

Warnings: fighting, cursing. Physical fight. Part one

"Pedri, the ball. Keep your eyes on the fucking ball." Xavi yells. "God, what's going on with you today?"

Pedri can't even look at Xavi in the eyes, he has sis eyes glued to the floor. He can feel the looks of his teammates burning him.

"Miss that ball again, and you're benched." Xavi says, stern tone.

"I'm sorry, Mister."

He tries his best to focus on the ball, trying not to miss it or not miss the goal to the net, but he can't keep his mind on the field.

Gavi, playing with the other half of the team, stole the ball from him, making Oscar sound the little whistle.

He just observes the way Xavi is yelling. Tired and really not that interesting, he can't seem to understand a word that's coming out of his trainers mouth.

The training goes on for another half hour, and then they're all reunited in the salon to plan the next game.

The "Real Madrid vs Barcelona" typical classic.

He focuses all his attention on speech Xavi is giving the team. Turning his head to see Ferran typing something on his phone.

He makes the lining, Xavi kept his promise and bench him for the next game. Leaving the possibility of getting back if he improves in this next two trainings.

"Estas bien?" Ferran asks, taking him to the side for them to be alone.

"I'm not sure." He sincerely says. He can't keep secrets ti Ferran. "I just need to keep my head around what's important."

"And she's not?"

"The thought of her is making me be benched. I think I had enough of her for the rest of the week."

He turns to the dressing room, ready to collect his belongings and leave. No shower, no nothing.

But to his bad luck, Ferran is quicker and stops him by the arm. "You can't keep doing this. This is not healthy, Pedro."

"What am I supposed to do?" He angrily says, removing his arm from the hold of his friend. "She won't listen to me, she changed her number, she changed her apartment building. It's like she disappeared."

Ferran was holding the bitter "I told you" He had been keeping since after the party.

When a very angry Gavi told him about the words Eric said to his date and then to Pedro, he was pissed, he wanted to fight him. But, like a rational person, he calmed Gavi down and helped fixing the situation.

What he could help was the disaster Pedri did, yelling at you and fighting with gavi over the words of Eric. Words he warned him about.

"Just please call me if you need anything." He pats Pedri on the back and walks to the showers.

He nods, grabbing his stuff and walking back to his car. He wants to run away from everything and everyone.

Once he makes it to his car, his head feels like it's going to blow up. He'd dizzy and tired.

The way his heart is pounding like crazy and he feels like passing out scares him. This isn't news to him. He was having a panic attack.

He tries to breathe, counting things like you thought him. Five things you can see, four things you can touch, three things you can hear, two things you can smell, and one thing you can taste.

Once he's calmed enough to at least drive himself home, he calls Fer, asking him to be home "I need you, Fer." He says crying.

His brother was worried, his whole family was. He wasn't the sweet, happy and very enthusiastic boy they known. He was now this confused and sad looking boy.

Pedri can't even seem to move upstairs to his room, he can't help the tear falling down, he can't help the blame he feels.

His relationship with Pablo was broken, his relationship with Eric is almost non existent. All thanks to him.

He can't blame Eric for it, he was the one who did all the bad stuffs, hitting your friend, hurting you by not trusting you.

He remembered your words like if you were just telling them to him.

"You're not dumb. You're such a smart man. So I need you to use that intelligence to understand that if you keep doing this shit, you're losing me."

But did he lost you?

He wanted to heard you voice, wanted to hear about that interview you told him about the day of the wedding. He wanted to hear about your new workout routine.

But he can't, because everytime he calls you he hit voice-mail. Everytime he goes looking for you he remembers that a new person lives in that apartment. Everytime he tried to look up for your social media profiles you weren't there.

"And that fucking sucks." He tells Fer, not knowing how else express his feelings.

Fer understand the struggle you both are going through, from his brother side is the blame of making you leave and not being the man you deserved. And he also understand that you want Pedri to change and to fight for you.

Ferran and Fer tried his best to talk to you and convinced you to give Pedri a chance. Thing you denied, you made a promise to yourself, he needed to prove to you that he changed.

You wanted the relationship you had before, the trust, the unconditional love. You wanted to feel joy again, to feel like you could be with him again.

You can't say you had it worse, but you were struggling as well. Sira had to force out of bed and to a local park. You cried like a child in her lap, telling her how much you needed him.

"You don't need someone who can't make an effort of changing. You need to understand that."

She was right, you needed someone who will be there for you in bad and good. During hard and easy.

"Good morning sunshine." Sira yells opening the curtains. The sun hit directly to your face, making you groan and turn around.

"oh, no ma'am." she pulls the duvet in a quick motion. "I made breakfast, get up."

She gave you five minutes to wash your face and brush your teeth. You can't help to feel a little annoyed at the wake-up call Sira pulled.

"Eat, please." She serves the breakfast to you, giving you a fork and a kiss on the cheek.

The day was bright, the sun was shining so much, the view from your apartment was breathtaking, making you feel happy instantly.

"I can't believe we're going to graduate tomorrow." Sira yells while doing a little dance. "I'm so happy for us."

"I am too, thank you for sticking up to me after all this time."

You walk over to her, giving her a big hug. She separates a little, reaching for the grad hat you have in the corner, putting it up on you.

When you broke up with Pedri you had a very bad time, you were in denial, somehow blaming yourself for the things that happened.

Then was the rage, it was not your fault, it was Eric's and Pedro's fault. He was the one believing the disturbing mind of Eric.

Then came the sadness, you were crying like crazy, in the shower, at the movies when Sira and Kyle took you out, at the parking lot of the building.

And now you're just blue.

"We have to go get the dresses, eat and let's go."

When the lease for your apartment concluded. You wanted to move to a smaller place, wanting something more "home like"

Sira was not okay with the decision, she convinced her parents on sharing a Apartment with you while you both figure your life out.

The moving was heartbreaking for you, specially because you couldn't run away from the memories.

"When you graduate, we're moving together. We can remodel the house, giving it your touch, make this place our home."

You used to laugh, thinking it was crazy for him to think about settling down at barely twenty one. "You'll change your mind, Pepi. "

But he cut you off, telling you that there was no other thing in his mind. He can't picture a future without you in it.

"I invite Pablo to the ceremony, and Fernando." You confess.

"Are you sure about that?" She asked worried. "I mean, Pablo I guess but Fer?"

"My family isn't coming, so I have the tickets and the closest thing to a family here is you, your family that is already attending and the González."

"Okay, if you think that's the right think to do, I'm not saying anything."

🪷🪷🪷

"Squish, all of you, let me take a picture." Luis Enrique says. "Okay, in three, two, one, cheese!."

You smile, arm around Sira and Karla.

After what felt like a whole photoshoot, Sira was ready to greet some family members that joined the ceremony.

"Y/n!" you heard at the distance.

You turn around, looking for the voice. It was your favorite angry bird. The big white bouquet of flowers doesn't go unnoticed.

"Felicidades, preciosa." He hugs you with one hand, the flowers getting in the middle of that. "Oops, sorry. This is for you."

"Thank you, Pablito." You hug him carefully this time. "Thank you for coming."

"I was happy when you sent me the invite, Sam says hi and congratulations."

"Are you coming to my party?"

Pablo was about to answer but someone calling you name again interrupting him.

"Fer!" You say, happily about seeing him again. "Thank you for coming." You say, getting squish between his arms.

"Felicidades, hermanita." He kiss your cheek. "Mom and dad are so proud of you, they send their congratulations to you."

You smile at him, the warmth your heart is feeling is making you blush. "Thank you." You whisper. "Pablito and you need to tell me if you're coming tonight."

"I will, what about you, Fer?"

"I can't wait."

PabloGavi has added to his story

Yourusername has added to their story

🪷🪷🪷

"Okay, it's game day time. Let's finish preparing ourselves, and let's go warm up." Oscar says, excited about the match against RMA.

"Pedri, can I have a minute outside, please." Xavi calls.

He was trying his best to concentrate, head in the game. Even if that sounds like a high school musical thing to say.

"Mira, I know I said that I was benching you." Xavi began, making Pedri nod. "I'm going to make an exception, I'm making Marc play for twenty minutes then you're in."

"I promise that I won't lose the ball." He smiles like the cat in Alice in wonderland. "Gracias, Mister."

Xavi pats his back, smiling back at him. He knows that Pedri has the range, he just needs to take it out in the right place. The field.

Pedri has added to his story

"Finally, a game that was worth to watch." Kyle says, eating the remaining pop corn from the bowl.

This game was very important for the Barcelona, they needed this game to keep themselves at the top of La Liga.

And they did it. They won.

Pedri scored a game thanks to Pablo's passing the ball to him.

"He played really good." Karla comments.

"Yeah, he did." You whisper.

You were proud of him, he was your golden boy after all.

You remembered the first game you went to. He gifted you a shirt with his number. He sent a car to come get you.

That was the first gol he ever dedicated to you. You remember the way you felt, the smile on his face, the aura of the stadium. It was simply magical.

And now you're supporting him from the comfort of your home. Because no matter what, he was all that to you.

But where you still all that to him?

You always kept those thoughts for yourself, your friends were done with you talking about him. Always ending up crying.

"So are we going out tonight?" Karla asks, turning the TV off.

"I don't know if I want to go out guys." You say, washing the dishes from the dinner. "I'm not feeling well."

"A Tylenol and were out and about, my lady." Sira says laughing at your face.

"Fine, but I don't want to he out till five in the morning, please."

"Deal."

Yourusername has added to their story

The party was good, you ended up not inviting Kyle because you were feeling like having a girl's night out.

Karla got invited to a vip club that was on the way of your apartment, you were on your way there.

"We're going to the vip section." She says to the bodyguard at the entrance, showing him a picture. "Thank you."

The club was way fuller than the last one, the aura was way better too.

"Y/n, let's get a drink." Sira yells.

"Let's just take Karla to her friends table and we can go, okay?" You yell back, she nods.

Karla was seeing this dude that was a manager of some new footballers, they were young like in La Masia.

The other dudes at the table invited you to different drinks, since they got special treatment because of their vip status.

Karla has added to her story

You were thankful with your friends, they were making you have so much fun.

"Girls, I'm going to the bathroom." You say to your friends, getting up from your seat and walking to the little outside bathroom they have for the vip rooms.

You got knocked up a little by someone, hitting you shoulder with the door frame. "Fucking idiot." You say to yourself, smoothing the hurt area.

You were washing your hands when someone moved the doorknob, knocking desperately at the door.

"Wait, I'm almost done." You say drying your hands with a paper towel. The person on the other side keeps knocking like crazy. "It's been five seconds like wait." You say.

You open the door and to your surprise the face on the other side of the door is a familiar one. "Y/n?"

"Ferran, hi!"

He walks inside the bathroom, making your way out impossible since he closed the door. "Joer', it's so good to see you." He hugs you for a few seconds.

You can smell the alcohol in his breath, making you scrunch your nose. "Are you alone?" You ask him.

"No, I'm with some friends from Valencia."

"Okay, take care Fer, I need to go back to my friends." You wanted to leave so he can use the bathroom.

"Wait, I want to talk to you." He stops you from opening the door. "Please give me your number."

You think for a few seconds, not sure about the proposal. "What if I wait for you outside?" You smile at him.

"You won't run away?" He asks, you shake your head no. "Pinky promise?" He elevate his pinky finger over to you.

"Pinky promise." You smirk while intertwining fingers with him. "Hurry up." You say, walking outside for him.

A few minutes later you see Ferran dance walk over to you, you smile at this goofiness. You missed that.

"Tell me, Mister paella." You joke, mentioning his nickname you and Pedri gave him.

"I wanted to tell you, more like ask you for a favor." He says breathlessly. "I know you might say no, but I want to try."

You knew where this was going, but you let him continue with his speech. Nodding your head to let him know you heard him and to continue.

"I know that you probably are in a better place and you are moving on, but please heard me out. Pedri is not alright, and you don't own him nothing after the stupid shit he pulled, but please you need to talk to him."

You sigh, you know that he was not having the best development during training or at the matches. Fer told you that already, but he didn't asked for you to reach to him.

"I know I'm asking for too much." He continued. "I'm just out of ideas of what to do with him. Xavi is about to beat his ass, Oscar too, Gavi and him don't even look at each other. We almost beat Eric to the ground with Gavi."

"He deserves that." You scuff. "But I'm not sure what you expect me to do?"

"Can you maybe call him? Or text him?" He asks. "Or I don't know, send him a dm if you don't want to share your number with him."

You think about it for a good minute, you knew that he was struggling, you were too, but you wanted to maybe help him even when he didn't deserved that.

"I'll reach out to him." You finally say. Making Ferran jumps from excitement. "I'll try to find a good time, okay?"

He nods excited, hugging you and giving you a quick kiss in the side of the head. "Thank you, if you need a ride home you can tell me."

"Thank you, I'm good, my friend is driving us." You wave him goodbye. Both of you go back to each vip rooms.

🪷🪷🪷

"Look at this cd" Pablo says, passing the 1989 cd. "What are you doing this December?"

"Well, I was thinking about spending my December here in Barcelona." You say, helping him organizing some pictures. "Aw, young Pablito." You say, showing him the picture.

"Stop that." He laughs. "So you're not going back home?"

"I mean my family is not going to be there, so I might as well be alone here."

"You're welcome to spend time with Sam and with me. Also with my family and me."

"Thank you, crunchy guy." You joke with him.

Now that he's in recovery you can visit him more often. You love watching new movies and shows with him because you have the same taste.

"I want to ask you something." You say, not sure how to approach the topic of Pedri. "But you can tell me if it makes you uncomfortable."

"Okay?" He says, eyes scrunched.

"Ferran and I were at the same club and we find ourselves in the bathroom." You began. "Long story short, he asked me to call Pedri."

"Y/n, I'm not the best to give you advice on this."

"I just need guidance, Pablo." You confess. "I'm not one to ask you anything but just be honest with me."

"Joder" He sighs, hands on his face. "What do you want me to say?"

"How is he?" You ask worried. "Is he doing okay?"

"He came to see me at my recovery the other day." He says, hand scratching his head. "He asked me to forgive him."

You let him take him time to tell you everything.

"We talked and it's not like we are on speaking terms like we used to but we are better."

"That's good, I think you both needed that." You say honestly.

"Now, to answer you. I think he's doing better little by little. He's not the best at hiding his feeling and you know that, he tents to get quiet and death looking." He laughs at the last part. "But, if you want my opinion, I think he needs to fight for you. A call or a text will not harm anyone."

You nod, taking everything he says into consideration. He was right, Pedro had to make some sacrifices for you.

"But, you can do what you think is best." He says, hands in the air.

"Thank you, angry bird." You hug his body, careful with his leg. "Love you."

"Can you show me love in a form of a sandwich?" He asks, batting his eyelashes like a little kid. "Pretty please."

"Just because you're my little baby." You tap his nose with care. Making him laugh. "I'll be back."

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"I was thinking about doing a baking course." You tell Sira, you're at the pool at her parents house. "I want to learn how to do Christmas cookies."

"My mom knows how to, you can ask her to teach you."

"That's better, you're right."

You keep looking at your phone, it's been three weeks since the talk with Ferran and two since the talk with Gavi.

Today they announced that Pedri was feeling some pain in his muscles, so he wasn't training. You know how much that affects Pedro mentally.

"Hey, what if we go change? I kinda want to go shopping." You say, getting out of the pool and walking over to the towel. "You coming?"

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Siramartinezc has added to her story

🪷🪷🪷

"I'm going to take a shower and we can eat, okay?" You say, hands full of bags. "Chao bella, take a shower please."

You leave everything on a chair next to your bed, the phone in your pocket feels heavy, you know you want to make that call.

You dial his phone number, sitting with your legs crossed on your bed. Your heart is beating like crazy.

"Hola"

Your breath is gone, you suddenly lost the ability to talk.

"Hola?" He repeats.

His raspy voice, his heavy breaths when he's trying to catch air. Simply him.

"Hola." You whisper.

Now is his turn to lost the speech ability. He's frozen. It's been months.

"Y/n?" He asks, not believing you're the one on the line.

"Hola." You repeat. "Te llamé en mal momento?" (Did I call you at a bad time?) You ask, bitting your nails.

"No, de hecho no estaba haciendo nada." You can hear a door closing. "How are you?" (No, I was actually not doing anything)

"I'm good, dealing with life. What about you? I heard about your muscle pain."

Your voice is low, you feel scared of saying something wrong. Even though you're barely at the beginning of the call.

"I've been better, I'm missing the Dallas game." He sighs. "I just feel like every time I'm feeling confident about coming back, my body gets fucked up."

You humm in response, letting him vent his frustration.

"I'm tired honestly, Xavi and Oscar are at the edge with me and I think that with the team. Frenkie barely came back, the team sucks, Gavi is hurt."

"I'm sorry this is going like that." You say, being honest.

"I don't even log into social media anymore. On Twitter and on Instagram the haters keep comparing me with Jude, with Vini, with Rodry. I'm so done, Y/n."

"Ay Pepi, I wish I can say something to make you feel better. But you know I suck at that." You laugh, making him laugh too. "You know you're amazing, and that if Xavi and Oscar get frustrated they don't feel your pain, that's why you have to be open with how your body feels."

"I do, believe me that I do, but I can't help but think that every time I say my muscles hurt, they gave me this disappointed look."

The way his voice break makes your heart hurt. You know from past experiences that his mental health goes down day by day if he overthink about the topic.

"And my parents and Fer try to tell me off of this ideas and I don't think it's working. I just wish I can turn my brain off for the night so I can sleep well tonight."

His breathing is getting heavier by the second, you can pick what's going on. He's overthinking and about to have a panic attack.

"Oye, tell me about that game you wanted to buy." You ask out-of the blue, making his mind think of another think.

"Game? What game?" He asks, voice breaking.

"Yeah, the one you wanted to buy. That one with the cars on it." You explain. "And what about that drink you wanted to try, did you tried it?"

"The green one?"

"Si, that one. Did you tried it? Was it good?"

"It tasted weird, and the game I never bought it. Lost interest on it."

"Okay, what about your mother croquettes?"

"They're so good, I broke diet the other day at Adrian's birthday party."

You can hear the breathing being hard but not as heavy as before. You relax, laying fully on your bed.

"Te amo." He says. "I'm sorry about everything, I'm so dumb. You told me that I was losing you and I never changed. It's my fault you're not next to me, that you're not at my games."

"Pedri, let's not do this." You interrupted him.

"Let me say it, Y/n." He begged. "I need to get this out of me, it's eating me alive."

"Okay, keep going."

"I know Fer went to your graduation. I cried myself to sleep that night, and every night after I lost you. I can't think of anything else." He sobs, making your heart hurt. "And my parents are so fucking mad at me, because how could I lost the girl of my dreams?"

"Pedro." You tried to make him stop.

"And my father told me how disappointed he was of me. He was so mad when I told him the truth. I can't keep doing this without you. You were supposed to be laying next to me, calling this place your home. I'm sorry."

"This is not why I called."

"Tell me what I have to do for you to forgive me." He begged again. "Tell me how can I fix this. Please."

"Pedro, stop."

"Please."

You wanted to hang up, not wanting to give up on all the progress you've made. In the promises you made to yourself.

"I think we both need to take a breath." You laugh nervously. "Please, breathe."

All you can hear was the heavy breathing from your and his side of the call. Your mind running a mile per second.

"Can we met, please?" He asks. Your heart was saying yes, but your mind was more coherent.

You were about to answer when Sira stormed into the room asking you to try something. Pedro heard the voice of her and wondered if you were at his parents house.

"I have to go." You say, hanging up the phone quickly. "What?" You ask Sira, she's looking at you with narrowed eyes.

"You okay?"

"Yes, I was about to take a shower but my mom called."

"Was it bad?" She asked worried. "Do you want to talk?"

"I'm fine, I'm just getting in the shower and then we can have some of that green thing you have in there." You tap her nose and walk quickly to the bathroom.

Pedro was laying on the couch he has in his room, his head pounding like crazy, the tears falling from his eyes, wetting his face.

He walks to his bathroom, he needs to wash his face. He needs to relax and breathe like you told him to.

The way he feels lighter after telling you how he feels was refreshing, his shoulders don't have the weight they used to five minutes ago.

His reflection is like a stranger to him. His dark circles under his eyes now darker, his weight every day less. He can't keep doing this to himself.

You feel the same way as you look at your reflection. The tears pooling that you don't want to let wet your face.

You take deep breaths, the sound of shower and the steam makes you be back from your thoughts. You got into the shower, sliding down the bathroom wall while hiding your face into your hands.

Pedro can't seem to find a way to stop his tears, knees on the floor while the sounds of his painful cry interrupt the peaceful silence of his home.

🪷🪷🪷

"You sure you're okay with me going to this party?"

Ferran invited you to his sister's birthday party, you and her were good friends thanks to Sira. Sadly due to the breakup, Sira didn't wanted to come but sent her a gift.

"Yes, go and have fun. I'm fine here with my book and with my coffee."

You kissed her on the cheek and went on your way, you asked Fer if he was coming but he told you that he was about to leave to Tenerife.

"But if you wonder or not." He says with a funny tone. "Pedri will be home."

You knew that Ferran sister didn't invite him, she told you herself. So you were fine with at least not having to tip toe around.

The party was at this club that Ferran rented for her party, you loved the pink and white theme she chose.

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You were enjoying yourself, finding some in common friends you haven't talk to in a while, the vibes were good and the night was refreshing for you.

You were retouching your makeup at the bathroom. You heard knocking on the door, thinking that maybe they found that the downstairs bathroom was full.

You take the last look at yourself in the mirror. Adjusting you jacket and opening the door, you find the person you wanted to dissappear from this earth.

The way he roll his eyes makes you angry, he was annoyed at your presence? You should be the one that's rolling the eyes at him.

"Move, please." You say, stern tone.

"You're leaving so soon?" He smirks.

You don't think twice and push him to the side, you can hear him fall over to the little sofa that was outside the bathroom.

You walk downstairs, finding the birthday girl and saying your goodbyes to her and to Ferran, who was next to her.

You were walking to your car when you feel someone grabbing you by the arm and throwing you agains a car door.

You groan at the pain that's growing on your side. You put your hand against your ribs, you find hard to breathe.

"You really think you can treat me like shit?"

"Are you out of your right mind?" You whisper, not fully recovered from the impact. "What the fuck."

"You're such a fucking bitch, making my friends be against me, making my team be against me."

"What the fuck are you talking about? You did this to yourself, Eric"

You tried to walk away from him by pushing him but he grabbed you back and stamped you back again. Making the car alarm sound.

"Eric, what the fuck?" You hear someone yell.

You notice how Ferran was running to where you are. Pushing Eric away from you. He shield you with his body.

"Why is everybody defending her?" Eric yells, getting closer again.

"Don't fucking dare."

"I just don't get why everyone believes she's the innocent girl she pretends to be."

You scuff, he's the one mad at you as if he didn't ruined your relationship. "You were the one telling Pedri shit and making him doubt me. You ruined my relationship"

"Oh no, I ruined your little gold digging act? Are you not able to afford rent now?"

"Fuck you." You spat, feeling rage grow inside of you. "Maybe if you use that mind inside the field you would be a good player and not the trash you are."

"Enough!" Ferran yells. "You, go away." He points at Eric. "Now!"

He grabs your arm, making you walk away from the scene. You keep your hand on your side, trying to smooth the area where is hurting.

"Can you drive?" He asks, you nod slowly. "What the fuck, what the actual fuck?" He whispers.

"I'm fine, you can go back to the party, Ferran." You whisper. "Thank you."

"Are you okay?"

"I'm in shock but I'm fine, don't worry about me. Please don't let this ruin the party." You hug him, his hands on your back trying to calm you down.

Even when you don't cry or show any emotion, he knows you're not okay.

"Tell me when you're home"

"Yes, I'll dm you, thank you."

He's back inside once you're on your way at the driveway. You're on autopilot, feeling hazy from all the emotions you're feeling.

You don't even notice the turns you make until you're outside his door. You turn off the car, taking your phone to text him.

You waited for barely two minutes, the door of his house opening. You take your seat belt off and stretch to the passenger door, opening it for him.

"Hola, preciosa." He says, worried expression on his face. "Are you okay?"

"Want to go for a ride?" You ask, ignoring his question. He nods, asking you to wait for him.

Once he collects his keys and a sweater, he hup up your car and you began the drive. You have a destination in mind.

Hes quiet, not sure if he's supposed to ask you again if you're okay. He's just enjoying seeing you after so long.

"It's too cold for just that jacket." He says, eyes up and down your body.

"It's fine, it keeps me warm." You say, the stern tone of voice worries him. "Seatbealt on." You say when the annoying alarm goes off.

"Yours is off too." He points at your chest, you just groaned, putting the seatbelt on.

Your drive to the highest part of the park. The beautiful view of Barcelona at night welcome you. You turn the car off, getting out as soon as you can.

You wanted to scream.

All you wanted was peace. You wanted to feel like you used to feel before all of this. You wanted to be able to go home and find your boyfriend there or go to his place and share things about your day, share moments with him.

The hands of Pedri on your shoulders feel heavy, you take a step, making the contact break.

"Do you trust me?" You ask on the verge of tears.

"With my life." He answer, not wasting a minute.

"Then why did you do that to me?" You let the tears fall down your face. "Was I not a good girlfriend?"

"Y/n, don't say that." He shake his head no. "You were the best thing I ever had."

"Then tell me, what it was?"

"It wasn't you, it was me. All me." He elevated his voice. Not at you but at the heat of the situation. "It was all me, I was the one who got those stupid ideas in my head, I trusted you, I knew Kyle was nothing but your friend, I knew you were just friends with Pablo, I know you would never do nothing to hurt me."

"What about the day I left?" You ask, the aftertaste is bitter on your mouth.

The thought of that day bring nightmares to his mind. The things he told you, the shit he provoked. They way he pushed you over the edge to the point of making you leave.

"I don't have a problem with the way you dress, I love your style. I don't have a problem with how much you love your friends, I love your way of acting, the way you love everyone, I don't have a problem with you being friends with Pablo, I love you and I love how my friends are your friends."

He take a deep breath, feeling like the air in his lungs is not enough. Feeling like the cold air is making breathing hard.

"And I'm sorry about the way I treated you, the way I was acting, I never meant to make you feel bad about my insecurities. I was the problem. I was the one who let someone else get into my head, I was the one who made the mistakes, and i was the one who made you feel like I didn't love you."

He gets closer to you, hands on your cheeks, drying the tears. Your hold his hands with yours. "But I love you, don't ever think that I don't." He whispers, kissing the top of your nose.

You nod, grabbing his face with your hands, caressing his cheeks. You pull him towards you, pressing your foreheads together.

"I love you too." You say after a while, pulling away from him. "But I have to love myself first. And I need to see that you changed."

Even when your words burn his heart, he understand. He wanted to prove himself to be what you needed, the person you can trust. He wanted to be all that to you again. Because you're all that to you.

"I'll do anything to prove to you that I changed. I'll wait as long as you need to, I want you to trust me again."

"I miss you." You hug him, arms locking behind his neck. His hands don't miss a minute to intertwine behind your back.

"I miss you more." He kisses you neck. "I promise I will prove you that I can be the person you deserve."

You enjoyed the warmth of his body against yours. You can't help but think of how he was right and your jacket was definitely not enough. You giggle a little.

"What's that?" He asks, smiling.

"You're right, it's too cold." You sniff, feeling the cold reach every part of you.

He separates and undo the zipper of his sweater, hands on each side opening the sweater for you to hug him and get more warm.

"Now that's better." You say, kissing his collarbone, making him smile against your hair.

🪷🪷🪷

"Last christmas I have you my ass, but the very next day you fuck my best friend, this year I'm fucking you dad and I'm also fucking your cousin."

You laugh at Fer singing Cardi's remix of the Christmas song. He was helping you with baking christmas cookies over FaceTime.

Pedro and you have made amazing progress, he was proving himself day by day.

"To think that a year ago today you guys were at the top of a cliff at the park solving your issues." He jokes, making Pedro give him the finger while laughing.

"Good thing your bother knows how to redeem himself." You second Fernando's joke.

"Joer, hablan de mi como si yo no existiera y estoy aquí parado, no me imagino cuando no los pueda escuchar." He laughs, making you smile and shake tou head at him. (You guys talk about me as if I'm not standing right here, I can't imagine what you say when I'm not present)

"only good things, mi amor." You kiss his cheek.

"Bueno, yo los dejo, I have to help mom with some things at la Tasca." (Well, I'm out) he waves you goodbye and cut the FaceTime.

Pedri has added to their story

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You two spend the rest of the day decorating and eating the cookies. Making Pedri break his diet, but he was okay with that.

"Oye, ven pa'qui." (Hey, come here) he calls you.

you walk over to him, he's sitting on the couch. A elf hat on his head. You can't help but smile at his cuteness.

"Yes sir?" You ask.

He possess his hands on your waist, pulling you towards him and making you fall on his lap. "Do you like how the house is looking."

"Very much, I love our home." You say, hugging him. "And I love you."

He smiles at you, looking around. He can't help but feel proud of himself. He proved you that he was worth a second chance. That he was your person and that he loved you more than anything.

He was happy you were happy with him. And that was something he knew he couldn't lose. Not you, not your love and not your future together.

"I love you more."

✨️✨️✨️

🏷: @gulphulp @jack1n @girlidekanymore @gadriezmannsgirl since you asked for part 2 🤭✨️

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haechvn · 1 year

Text

Hold On

Pairing: Shuri x Reader

Warning: Angst and a lil fluff. Shuri is a little bit moody but who can really blame her

Summary/Request: y/n is a lab specialist and is sent to work in shuri’s lab after during that year after t’challa passed on (hurt/comfort) then maybe y/n was in the market when the tallokan attacked and shuri protects.

Word Count: 1.9k

Author’s Note: Takes place during Wakanda Forever so beware of spoilers.

I am working on a few rn but KEEP SENDING REQUESTS. We didn’t just have Shuri star in her OWN MOVIE for y'all to be ignoring her. You guys should be ashamed. Don't play with me, play with yourself. Enjoy my loves!

“Shuri, I get what you are trying to do but are you sure recreating the herb solely in a lab will give you the same results? Aren’t there any cultural lines you’d be crossing or something? Maybe we should ask the Queen about this first,” you quipped as you steadily chased Shuri around her lab, hoping to get her to reconsider her next steps with the current experiment.

It has been over a year since the sudden passing of her older brother and the only life she has been able to live is that of a mad scientist - nothing more and certainly nothing less. Of course she still took proper care of herself but her only desire was to find a way to crack the code that could have saved T’Challa’s life. That pain is with her everyday so to combat that, she has put together a squad of the most brilliant minds in Wakanda to help her efforts and that is where you come in. Working alongside the Princess as a Lab Specialist, who is an expert in working with organic matter and analyzing foreign and home-based substances. Truth be told, Shuri adores her entire team but values your opinion and work above all. Maybe it's because your eyes keep her up at night. But in this situation, no one's words were really as important as her own. At least, that’s what she thought.

“I know what I’m doing,” she seethed stentoriously, speaking as if every word was its own sentence. Stopping abruptly and turning around for you to greet her rigid eyes, her jaw clenched and the veins on her forehead looked like they wanted to break free. Shuri did not want to have this conversation with you again because as more time passed, the more her patience with this project wore thin. Why does everyone still view her as a child? Why can’t her plans be good enough? Every cell in your body told you that you had yet again irritated the Princess.

“I'm tired of everyone questioning me as if I am not the smartest woman in the world! Go to the market like I requested and pick up the items I asked you to so we can go back to experimenting and stop all this talking. That’s an order.”

Scoffing at her disrespectful tone, you continued on, wanting the Princess to fully think through the ramifications of what lies ahead. She may be royalty but she was also your friend so to hear her speak to you this way without any regard of how you may feel made your heart crack just a bit. You had done your best to be there for her during this very difficult last year and always offered a shoulder to cry on but she has unknowingly begun taking her anger out on you. Her taut voice introduced many onlooking eyes peering over to the previously quiet conversation the two of you were having. Crossing your arms in front of your chest, you held your ground.

“How long will this go on for? You constantly treat your colleagues like we are nothing but mere pets to you. Didn’t you bring us in so that we could help you find ways to solve your problem? That is what I am trying to do here and I don't understand why you can’t see that. I just want you to be safe,” you let out with your voice slightly cracking, exhausted from arguing and the constant back and forth. Sure you kept her on her toes from time to time but this just became too much. Thinking about what could happen if she ingested the curated herb and Bast forbid something went wrong. You wouldn’t be able to forgive yourself. No. You can’t let your mind go there.

Not letting her answer your questions, you bowed to the Princess and spun on your heels, signaling your exit from the lab with your coat rustling behind you. Quickly rushing out, you could hear her sigh and beckon you towards her but your head was held high as you trekked forward. You didn’t wish to be disregarded any further and the Princess clearly needed some time to think.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“That’ll be 12 Wakandan dollars pwease,” said the young girl selling herbs, plates and bowls with her mother. Dots and stripes dance on her face and her smile reminds you of the one Shuri used to carry. It has been so long - too long so maybe this will bring that back to her.

Thanking the girl and her mother, you start to head back to the lab but not without appreciating the breathtaking beauty of the culture in Wakanda. Such peaceful and vibrant people to match the ethereal aura of this wonderful nation is something that can only be witnessed with your own eyes. In the distance, you made out the figure of a certain Jabari leader smiling widely and waving his enormous hands at you. M’Baku has really proven himself to be a formidable and dependent member of the Wakandan civilization. Just as you lifted your hand to greet him back, you heard the girl and her mother that you bought from scream in anguish.

Whipping your head around, all you could see for miles was water exploding out of thin air. Everywhere started to flood and all the stores and their owners began disappearing before your eyes. Clutching the materials that Shuri requested, you tried your hardest to outrun the waves if that is even possible. You can’t even swim so trying to head towards the water was completely out of the question, especially once three foreign figures rose from the shore. Just like in those cliche horror films, you naturally lost your footing and all you could think was Wait. Atlantis is a real place??!!

Scared for your life, you gathered yourself up and continued onto the palace until the sweetest melody you have ever heard entered your senses. Dropping everything from your grasp, in a trance you found yourself facing the mysterious figures again, this time in the direction of a man adorned in gold, jade and what is that? Vibranium? However your thoughts were no longer your own and all you wanted to do at this present moment was obey the orders of the singing siren before you. Chaos and destruction ensued around you but all you felt was peace. An eerie peace that sent chills down your spine but whisked your mind away from any current circumstances. Your mind knew he was about to kill you.

On your way down to kneel in front of this unknown enemy, your name was shouted out at you from the heavens above. The voice held fear and grievance in it and it snapped you out of your hypnosis. It was the Princess. Up above in a ship with what looked like Nneka, waving you down endlessly in hopes to get your attention. Even during her most vulnerable moments, Shuri looked absolutely glorious. Maybe it’s the way her curls fell forward as if they were reaching out to you or her deep charcoal eyes that seems to call you hers. Either way, with the world crashing down around you, you still couldn’t help the butterflies in your chest every time you laid eyes on her.

Before you could register what was happening, her figure dove out of the aircraft and was headed straight towards you. It seems as though she cracked the code. Landing stealthy with her back turned towards you, her black panther suit seemed to glow in the sun. Decorated in gold and silver from top to bottom, you couldn't hold in your shock. Shuri had always said that the black panther died with her brother but it seems as though she was terribly incorrect.

“Namor. I guess this makes me your enemy now,” she stalked towards him as he slightly trembled in surprise.

Shuri’s languid movements reminded you of her brother but much more graceful and slightly less calculated but magnificent nonetheless. Intense blows were exchanged between the both of them as you scampered away to find safety in an attempt to avoid the crossfire. Namor eventually catapulted himself away from the Princess and made his way towards the Royal Palace. Getting ready to run in his direction, the Black Panther halted and turned to finally face you.

Your heart was pounding profusely as she neared you and her helmet disappeared. Her eyes held the story of everything she had been through yet she still carried on like royalty, with such poise and dignity.

She’s here. She’s here. She’s here. She really came here to save me.

You have never seen the Princess kneel before, especially not in a public place so your eyes went wide as she went down on one knee and grasped your hands. Her chest was going up and down at an alarming rate and the grip she had on you started to burn.

“I’m so sorry I-. I had hoped you were-. Ugh! I can’t believe he almost-,” her words failing her at every opportunity. Tears dropped onto your joined hands and her back shook with her cries. When Shuri had received a distress signal, she had no choice but to take the incomplete herb in an attempt to even the playing field with the submariner. It scared her even more to know that he was attacking the market, the same place she had sent you to in a fit of rage. She couldn’t even believe she used that tone on you of all people so the thought that that might have been the last conversation between you two - no. Not again. She shook her head over and over, not daring to look you in the eyes because she didn’t deserve your kindness. From the outside looking in, Princess Shuri was losing it and this new mantle she now carried was already beginning to be too much for her.

“Stand up! You are a Princess,” you bellowed, your heart breaking at the sight. Though you shared the same frightened feeling as her, she needed someone to be strong for her and who better than you.

"We can have this conversation later but your people need you. Your country needs you. Show them who you are, Shuri. Then come back to me.” You couldn't believe you were here offering this kind of counsel to the Princess. You two have really come a long way.

Her head snapped up, curls dancing across her forehead, showcasing her cherry red, tear-filled eyes. She really thought she lost you.

Quickly gathering her strength, she called for Nakia to “beam us up” and take you to safety. As you are being lifted up, her arms softly wrap themselves around your torso while your chests are conveniently pressed up against each other. Shuri’s eyes haven’t been able to leave yours and they are saying all the things her lips and insecurities wouldn’t allow her. You nod and offer a small smile, knowing that that’s the best thing you could muster up in the moment. Her eyes traveled between yours and your lips over and over. She licked her lips out of nervousness and tried to see if her actions would be accepted before she leaned forward to close the gap between you two. Just as her ready lips grazed yours, Okoye’s voice screeched and pierced through her earpiece.

“My Princess! The Royal Palace is underwater!”

1K notes · View notes

thegreymoon · 20 days

Text

The Story of Minglan

Bitch, you just tried to strangle your daughter. What maternal instinct?

And the only reason you took your son when you abandoned her was because you thought you could get more money for him.

***

OH MY GOOOOODDDDDDDDDDDD 🤬🤬

THIS REPULSIVE PETTY PIECE OF SHIT WASTE OF AIR!!

Seriously, I despise him more than Manniang!

My guy, quit while you're ahead! You lost the girl because you were spineless. Get over it and stop embarrassing yourself! 🤬🤬

***

LMAO, what else is he supposed to do?

Let's say it's been four or five years since Manniang ran off. This child was two at most at the time. He would be six or seven now. What are you talking about? That is still a whole baby!

I love (and by love, I mean hate) how disposable children are in this society unless they are sons anchoring their mother's position in their respective households.

***

Oh, shut the fuck up, you bitter, pathetic loser.

***

Drag him, Tingye!

I am so sick and tired of his bullshit.

***

NOOOO, BUT DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND, HE IS THE MAIN CHARACTER OF THE ENTIRE UNIVERSE!

OF COURSE, MINGLAN WAS SUPPOSED TO WAIT UNTIL RETIREMENT FOR HIM TO GET HIS SHIT TOGETHER AND SUFFER ALL KINDS OF INDIGNITIES IN THE MEANTIME!

HOW DARE SHE NOT BUILD A SHRINE TO HIS ESTEEMED PERSON AND PUT HER ENTIRE LIFE ON HOLD SO THAT HE CAN FEEL IMPORTANT?

With all that said, this actor is beyond fantastic, I can see why people are obsessed with him. I hope to watch him in a more sympathetic role next time.

***

LMAO, look at the pot calling the kettle black 🤣🤣

I cannot with this loser of a man.

***

If he had not been born rich, he would have been the founding father of the incel movement, blaming every man with even a semblance of a spine on his inability to fuck.

***

Oh, sure, it was for the government 🙄🙄

Your jealousy is palpable. You can't even convince yourself.

***

LMAO, what the fuck.

This is a dead child you're talking about! Your child! And you are mad you cannot get money and status because of him?

***

She's right, though, she did make the biggest fool out of him.

***

Good for you for slapping her, Minglan!

I've been waiting for someone to do it for ages now.

In fact, so many people in this drama deserve slapping. It's about time you got started on that.

***

Aww, he found his dead baby 😢

***

Wait, that's all?

THAT'S ALL??

WE DO NOT EVEN GET A BEHEADING 😭😭

Not only does her sorry ass not get punished in any way, he will continue to provide for her for the rest of her life. Sure, she will not be living in a manor in luxury as his wife, but she will have a roof over he head and food to eat, plus he will have to employ people in the middle of nowhere to make sure she doesn't go causing trouble again.

She should be in prison instead. Or in some hard labour colony, which I'm sure there are plenty of in Song Dynasty China. OR BEHEADED!!

And what about his maternal Bai relatives? Do they at least get arrested/exiled/beheaded? They have been REPEATEDLY trying to kill him for YEARS!

I am very disappointed with this resolution.

***

Well, I am glad this is over.

Honestly, as far as I am concerned, this whole Manniang subplot has been a huge blight on this otherwise excellent show and a black stain on Gu Tingye as a character. Big thanks to @ruizhi for filling me in on the details from the novel so that I can understand the writing decisions here better. Obviously, I realise that I am in the minority for disliking these decisions (and Gu Tingye as a character) because from what I have seen, he is a firm favourite among the people who watched this drama and everyone is on board with this sanitised version of his character arc.

I have to be honest, if they had kept his harem from the novel, I probably would not have touched this with a ten-foot pole, because I freely admit that I watch c-dramas for the pretty people and idealised romance. I also know that this would have made Gu Tingye more realistic and thus harder to project on, which is ironic because my complaints here are the lack of realism and easy ways out since they decided to include his other women in the drama too. Harem stories depress and infuriate me and I do not watch them unless there are very compelling reasons for me to pick them up, so out of a couple of hundred dramas on my to-watch list, this one would probably not have made it to the top if it had been closer to the source material.

Even as it is, all this is precisely why I put off watching Minglan for the longest time. I knew it had polygamy at its core and this made me disinclined to start it, even though it was warmly recommended by many people in whose good taste I trust. I eventually only started watching because a c-drama friend of mine told me that there is no harem here and that Minglan and Tingye were monogamous and ride-or-die for each other, so Manniang showing up early on was an extremely nasty surprise.

With that said, now that I am here already and very invested in this story, I've long since come to terms with the fact that romance is not the main focus of this show and adjusted my expectations. I am really enjoying it for what it is, which is a family drama focused on women's struggle and suffering in this hell system that they must learn to navigate or die destitute, which is why I am especially irked by this cheap trickery they are employing to make Gu Tingye's and Minglan's relationship more "clean" than it actually is. You cannot have it both ways. Either these characters are realistic people of their time or they are not. Either you are sticking to the book version of them in the adaptation or you are not. But these cake-eating writers (as in wanting their cake and eating it too) definitely tried to get away with both and ended up with huge inconsistencies in their story that irritated me enough to sit down and write this entire screed.

Like I said in my comments on my previous Minglan post, this is the exact thing that made TTEOTM unwatchable for me and landed it on the list of the worst dramas I ever subjected myself to, despite my unceasing obsession with Luo Yunxi. Obviously, I am feeling this on a lesser level with Gu Tingye, because overall, the writing of Minglan committed fewer crimes than TTEOM and remains solid on all other fronts, so I am still invested in the story overall, him as a character and him and Minglan as a couple, but the writers here are just as much cake eaters as the writers on TTEOTM. They looked at this bad boy who worked for a story in another medium precisely because he was morally compromised in some way, wanted that for themselves, but then could not or would not follow through, either because they feared they would alienate a big portion of their audience, or because the Chinese censorship board wouldn't let them get away with it. Then they did this ridiculous thing where they tried going, "Yeah, he's bad, but he's not really! He was set up! It was a misunderstanding!" And ended up blowing a giant hole in their whole story.

If they didn't want to explore Gu Tingye as a man of his time making the same selfish decisions as other men of that time, then they should not have had him acting like one. They should have had a logical and consistent reason why he didn't keep mistresses and concubines (such as, idk, seeing his mother suffer or something) and not introduce Manniang in the first place. What was the point of her in the plotline if we were not going to see him and Minglan make the hard decisions, either to treat his illegitimate offspring as lower-class citizens so that her biological kids could be afforded all the privileges of their rank (which would obviously not sit right with the modern audience), or go with the modern moral code that the show wants them to have and deny Minglan's bio kids by treating all the children equally (which could have been done legally if Minglan was to adopt them, but of course, she was never going to do that)? If you never intended to go there, then why bring in Manniang and her kids in the first place?

In my opinion, if they wanted Gu Tingye untarnished in this way and his love with Minglan unburdened with the baggage of other women and stepkids, they should never have kept Manniang in the adaptation. Once they brought her in, there was no stuffing that genie back into the bottle. The shadow of book!Tingye has been around since the adult actors took over and it is not even the non-monogamy that is an issue for me now, but the character inconsistency and the extremely cheap sleight of hand that they pulled in an attempt to smooth it over.

Here is the thing. Every time I start on a story, be it a book, movie, drama, or whatever, there is a certain premise that it promises to fulfil, which comes with the expectations and limitations of the genre. I adjust my standards accordingly, so if I sit down to watch a fluffy romcom with a young, naive intern falling in love with the son of CEO, then I will judge it on how funny it is and whether the main couple is hot enough and has enough chemistry to keep me invested till the end. I am not going to be particularly worried about the power imbalance and the IRL implications of such a setup, my main concern will be if the main couple look like they are having good enough sex and if I can shoehorn my own escapist fantasy into that dynamic. However, if I start a show that deals with misogyny, patriarchy and sexual harassment of women in the workplace, then you cannot dump the privileged son of the CEO into a relationship with the main heroine and expect me to root for it, unless he is right there beside her, taking his father to court for abuse of power and dismantling the system from within. This is, IMO, what this drama failed to do with Gu Tingye. You cannot promise me a Xiao Qi and deliver a Sheng Hong with the serial numbers filed off.

Based on what I've heard and read about the original novel, book!Tingye is not that much better than Sheng Hong. He had multiple women and illegitimate children that he was playing favourites with based on their birth and rank. He sabotaged his older son and indirectly caused his death so that Minglan's children would not have competition. His daughter by Manniang was just as traumatised as Minglan. He had concubines, who were also technically wives with no way out of a hell marriage, whom he then discarded when it was convenient for him. The only reason this marriage was a victory for Minglan is that she was now the favoured wife with the highest rank, thus her circumstances in life dramatically improved. I understand why they didn't want to portray this to a wider audience, and that doing so would have seriously dented Feng Shaofeng's reputation as a heartthrob in the c-ent industry, but then they shouldn't have opened that can of worms to begin with.

I feel like they should have cut the Manniang storyline completely if they weren't going to do it properly, or, idk, had her go off the deep end much earlier and kill her kids off before he got with Minglan. That could have been used as a catalyst for his change, having him go, "That's it! No more mistresses and concubines for me!" Then we could have seen the rest of it play out as it did (minus Manniang) with a REASON, with his family pressuring him to take in a wife and concubines, him saying no, then falling in love with Minglan and moving on from there naturally and giving us a clean, idealised romance that is not typical for their time.

However, once they brought in Manniang but did not bring in all the nasty stuff implied with him having a kept woman and illegitimate children, they shot themselves in the foot because now Gu Tingye's character was in conflict with the story's internal logic. We have seen how this world functions, we have seen how concubines and the children of concubines are treated. Naturally, once they introduced Manniang and her kids (but especially her son), we were expecting to see exactly what happened in the novel, because this is the premise of the story and the laws by which the world it is set in is governed. The fact that this didn't happen did not make me sigh in relief and think of Gu Tingye as a good guy, it made me question why the story never went there. The cowardly shortcuts out of this predicament and the cheap trickery the writers used to avoid it made me feel like the story was "lying" to me, which is maybe a ridiculous word to use because this whole thing is fiction and therefore a lie. But I could no longer suspend my disbelief, immerse myself in the narrative and root for these characters. Suddenly, they felt fake.

Also, I feel downright insulted by these writing choices.

"Yeah, Gu Tingye had another woman but that's OK because she was actually evil so she doesn't count and he was right to abandon her and have his true romance with Minglan! 😀"

"Yeah, he had a son that he would have had to have been grossly unfair to or not have Minglan's kids get the full extent of their privilege of rank, but that's OK, because the kid just conveniently died! 😀"

"Yeah, his daughter should be traumatised in a hundred different ways from having such a biological mother and dealing with the inferiority complex from growing up right next to Minglan's legitimate children and knowing that in the eyes of society and her own father, she is lesser than them, but don't worry, that's OK, because we are making her suuuuuuuper well adjusted! 😀"

"Yeah, if Chang'er had lived, the audience would have been forced to confront the fact that Gu Tingye was very much a man of his time and that Minglan was also no benevolent saint and that they would have treated children that are not biologically hers as second-class citizens, just like Sheng Hong and Wang Ruofu did in the Sheng household! But that's OK, we'll just kill his illegitimate firstborn son so that you don't have to think about that! 😀"

As a character, Gu Tingye feels so disingenuous because of these shortcuts the writers took to scapegoat Manniang and absolve him of the consequences of being just like the other men in this drama. Would he have been an idealised c-drama hero that girls could pin their fantasies on if they had kept his novel characterisation? Absolutely not. They made him more attractive and palatable to a wider, modern, likely younger-leaning audience at the cost of the story's internal logic, plot coherency and character consistency, and that, for me, is a much bigger writing crime than him having a harem and treating his illegitimate children as lesser-than.

Again, this is an adaptation and nobody put a gun to their heads and forced them to include Manniang. If they had wanted Gu Tingye untarnished and idealised, they should have handled her differently. They cannot have it both ways.

With that said, I realise that I am in the minority here because most viewers were obviously very happy to let this slide (just like they were with TTEOTM). Again, most viewers will not agree with me on Gu Tingye because he is obviously a favourite ML for many, but for me personally, the overall drama loses lots of points on him, especially because of Manniang.

In any case, there are still more than twenty episodes left here for me, so onwards and forward to better plot points and character arcs! 😅

#the story of minglan #tsoml spoilers #tsoml ep51

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t0ast-ghost · 17 days

Text

S2 Episode 9 (Metamorphosis) Wait wait wait. I'm watching this episode on April 5th, this is so special (I know this won't be posted till days later but holy crap):

- I like hows there's just a mission that somehow requires the captain, first officer, and head medical officer to be on the same shuttle escorting one person

- I will not blame McCoy for anything (sorry. not sorry actually)

- They always take the Galileo

- Oooh pretty lighting

- "I'm not imagining you am I?" "We're real enough." Kirk what kind of fucking answer is that?

- "Food to a starving man. All of you." Saying this after he just shook Spock's hand is crazy…

- They’re conferring

youtube

- So the companion wants.. companions?

- SPOCK ITS BEHIND YOU

- The companion snap crackle popped the shuttle and Spock

- “It attacked you?!” Bones is shocked. “I’m not a scientist or a physicist, Mr Spock.” He says this with a smile and it’s such a moment between them

- This episode is like “if you love me let me go” and it’s such a deep love between them and holy shit

- hey siri what’s a “Judas Goat”?

- THEY FUCKING SHOT HIM

- McCoy watching his boyfriends die and begging the companion to stop

- “It isn’t your fault.” “I’m in command, Bones. It makes it my fault.” “How do you fight a thing like that?” “Maybe you’re a soldier so often that you forget you were also trained to be a diplomat.” Bones advice!

- Okay it just violently goes back to Scotty’s log. YESS UHURA AND SULU CONTENT!

- “It’s a big galaxy, Mr. Scott.” “Aye…”

- McCoy’s just standing there looking pretty next to Spock and Kirk in this episode, isn’t he?

- “The idea of male and female are universal constants, Cochrane.” Bull fucking shit, mate

- “You’re not a pet. You’re not a specimen kept in a cage. You’re a lover.” “I’m a whut!?”

“For all these years, I’ve let something as alien as that crawl around inside me, into my mind, my feelings…” So he wasn’t upset when he thought he was being treated as a caged animal/pet by a male or non gendered entity, but as soon as it’s a woman who’s in love with him... (its fair that he’s freaking out but like…what?)

- The boyfriend’s explaining why this guy should continue to date the cloud of sparkles. McCoy and Spock can agree on smt at least

- “No. I- I don’t want to die. I’ve been good at my job. But… I’ve never been in love. Never. What kind of life is that? Not to be loved. Never to have shown love. And he runs away from love.” This is such a heartbreaking and beautiful scene from the Ambassador

- “Companion, do you love the man?” “I do not understand.” “Is he important to you? More important than anything? Is he… as though he were apart of you?” SCREAMING CRYING THROWING UP WHAT IS THIS

- “But you can’t really love him. You haven’t the slightest knowledge of love— the total union of two people. You are the companion, he is the man. You are two different things. You can’t join. You can’t love. You may keep him here forever. But you will always be separate. Apart from him.”

- Jim just poured his fucking heart out and we know it was about them I’m dying and crying about this

- “What did you hope to gain by that, Jim?” “Try to convince her of the hopelessness of it. Love sometimes expresses itself in sacrifice. I thought maybe if she loved him… She’d let him go.” Oh my the parallels of it. This is about Spock and McCoy. He wants to be with them, but he knows he can’t let them go and so he sacrifices himself for them. Leave me alone in this hole of misery and self deceit.

- Loneliness, oh god the loneliness. Her eyes show so much in this scene

- I love when bones stands there like a NPC or lego character (oh my god I want a Bones Lego figurine)

- I’m just going to say it. I think this guy is bisexual. And it’s not just because of the colour of the sky.

- “As long as you grow old together.” You know who grows old together…. I’m fucking going I’m going off. Spock, McCoy, and Kirk grow old together (is what I’m getting at)

What.. what happened to me. This episode.. bye…

(Edit: I know canonically they’re not dating but I like to take all the evidence I can to support it. So if some of this stuff is a bit nonsensical… I’m sleep deprived as shit and it’s finals)

Masterpost

Episode written by Gene L. Coon

#Youtube #star trek #star trek the original series #star trek tos #tos kirk #captain james kirk #tos spock #s'chn t'gai spock #spock #tos mccoy #tos bones #leonard bones mccoy #zefram cochrane

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il0vewomenz · 1 month

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Kaede, Kokichi, Himiko, Maki, Ryoma and Angie with a S/O who doesn't stop and keep trying to escape throught the tunnel

When Gonta shared what he had discovered, you were filled with excitement. You were eager to see if it could help you and the others escape, so you all quickly went there.

However, as you and the others continued to fall, Kaede was about to convince everyone to try again when Kokichi interrupted her:

"You know what really hurts? Being denied the right to give up in an impossible situation...You won't let us give up and no matter what we say, you have the moral high ground...When you say we can't give up, you're not inspiring us-you're strong-arming us!"

He said.

"We shouldn't have to push ourselves...Lets just find another way out, okay?"

But you didn't want to.

"No way! I am not giving up!"

You shouted. There's no way you'll stop now when you've already started. And as you shouted it out, you began to try the tunnel option again. You didn't even care if someone would join you or not.

Kaede :

When Kokichi mentioned that she was "troturing" the group, she realized she was being too pushy. And your determination to keep trying didn't help much, as she thought it was because of her. She didn't want you to get hurt, after all.

But she couldn't stop you. You were too determined and didn't listen to a word she said as you went ahead.

But, of course, you failed.

"Y/N, are you okay?"

You didn't have time to reply.

"I gotta try again..."

You muttered to yourself. And you tried once more, only to get injured this time. Kaede quickly grabbed your arm and shook you a bit.

"Y/N, that's enough!"

She yelled out with a mix of worry and a hint of anger. But she wasn't mad at you, no. She was mad at herself. She thought she had pushed you too far and blamed herself for your injury.

"Alright..."

You said, feeling exhausted.

"Y/N... I'm so sorry."

She said.

"Huh? What are you sorry for?"

You asked, confused as to why Kaede thought it was her fault. In your eyes, she had done nothing wrong.

"Kaede, don't blame yourself for that!"

You reassured her.

Himiko :

Himiko was exhausted. She couldn't comprehend how you had so much energy. It must be because you relied on her magic, right? That's what Himiko believed, at least. Despite your repeated attempts, you failed once again.

"Nyeh... Y/N, I've run out of MP. You can't keep going."

She told you.

Your determination wavered, and you couldn't help but chuckle. Deep down, you knew her magic wasn't real, but you decided to play along.

"Oh, I understand! I guess I can't continue."

You said.

"Did you get hurt? If so, once I have enough MP, I'll heal you with a spell."

Kokichi :

When you disagreed with Kokichi and decided to give it another shot, he didn't try to stop you. As you attempted once more and, unsurprisingly, failed, Kokichi exclaimed:

"Y/N! You really shouldn't continue! You'll end up hurting yourself!"

But you chose not to heed his warning. It's Kokichi, after all... It's hard to tell if he genuinely cares or if he's just being his usual self.

In your second attempt, unfortunately, you ended up injuring yourself.

"See, Y/N? I told you so! But you never listen to me... It's because you hate me, right!? WAHHHH! You're so mean!"

You simply crossed your arms and patiently waited for him to finish his tantrum.

Later on, he would complain to Kaede, saying that she shouldn't have been so pushy because now his "beloved Y/N" was hurt. When you told him not to blame Kaede, he put on a sad facade.

"Y/N... You clearly don't understand!"

You let out a sigh.

"Do you even care, or is it all just a lie?"

You questioned him, and in an instant, his sadness disappeared, replaced by a mischievous grin.

"Nee-heehee! Maybe~? After all, I am a liar!"

Ryoma :

When you kept pushing yourself, attempting and trying over and over again, exhaustion started to take its toll. I mean, who wouldn't feel tired after all that? Just as you were about to give it another shot, Ryoma intervened:

"Y/N, it's clear that you're exhausted. That's enough for now."

"Ah... I'm not tired..."

You claimed, but it was obvious that you were lying. Your legs were even trembling

"Yes, you are. I can see it. But I suppose it's not my place to dictate what you should or shouldn't do."

He remarked. Summoning the last bit of strength and energy you had, you attempted once more. Unfortunately, it turned out to be a terrible decision. Now, not only are you even more fatigued, but you've also injured yourself.

"Hmph... Are you finished now?"

"Yeah... I think so..."

Maki :

Wow, what a determined idiot you are! As she observed your desperate attempts, she believed you would give up soon. However, you kept pushing forward. Even when exhaustion set in, you refused to quit. Unfortunately, you ended up getting injured. She couldn't help but let out a sigh.

"Stop it, you fool. It's pointless. You're not getting anywhere with this."

She expressed. Yet, your determination was unwavering. You yearned to escape so badly. One more try couldn't hurt, right? At least, that's what you thought. Oh dear, it hurts so much. Maki just stared at you with an annoyed expression. She approached you.

"Stop being so reckless."

She said coldly before tending to your wounds.

"Sorry..."

Angie :

She was really enthusiastic. Every time you attempted, she continued to cheer you on.

"Come on Y/N!"

Unfortunately, you couldn't succeed. Despite your repeated efforts, you ended up getting hurt and feeling a bit embarrassed, especially with how much she was rooting for you. In the end, you still lost.

"Nayahaha! You gave it your all!"

She said with a smile.

"Don't stress! Atua will ensure you recover quickly!"

She reassured you. She then checked to see if your injuries were serious.

"Y/N, since you're already bleeding, why not offer some blood to Atua?"

#danganronpa v3 #dvr3 #dvr3 x reader #danganronpa #danganronpa x reader #danganronpa x y/n #kaede akamatsu #kaede akamatsu x reader #maki harukawa #maki harukawa x reader #himiko yumeno #himiko yumeno x reader #kokichi oma #kokichi oma x reader #ryoma hoshi #ryoma hoshi x reader #angie yonaga #angie yonaga x reader #gn s/o

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charles-leclerc-official · 17 days

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not me giggling and laughing all through the mclaren section bc man. they were so fucking sure the fight would be nor-lec but then charles (beloved beautiful man that he is) simply. did not stop and went 'sucks to suck i guess' bc lando cooked his tyres in like. 10 laps(www tumblr com/petit-papillion/747288838196592640 - last laps have the same time between lando and charles. one is on 10laps tyres the other on 26laps tyres)? carlos having normal tyre wear and charles going 'couldn't be me' and having neg tyre deg in fucking suzuka???

the way that leclerc can match pace with max??? so fucking beautiful. let's not also forget that rb had major updates in suzuka while ferrari is running still at baseline and will be doing so until at least miami or imola iirc! kissing with tongue everyone in the ferrari aero department for that

best quotes

There was really no way for them to see that coming. It’s kind of hard when your main competition decides this is the weekend he’s going to challenge the laws of physics.

But I think the fact that Mclaren kept trying to figure out when Charles was going to pit for his second stint and then he just didn’t really threw them off and had them making some weird pit calls.

As would max say, simply lovely! ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

(I am also hitting that hopium so hard you've got no idea)

Yeah, this is how you know Charles is a true Ferrari fan. That was literally just psychological warfare against that entire team.

And I do like Lando and Oscar, don't get me wrong anyone, but as a Ferrari fan I legally cannot support Mclaren, you all understand.

But hopefully that cleared some things up because in the moment I saw a lot of Mclaren fans very confused by what the hell their team was doing.

I don't even really blame Lando, he did what he could with his car with the team strategy they were running, it was just so so so wrong.

Charles has the ability to cripple and entire team, they are just sopping wet cats after that.

Thank you for the quote pulls <3

#luci answers #race analysis talk

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yandere-sins · 2 years

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A Merman’s Tale

And now, for the finale... Thank you all for sticking around and reading this story ♥ Took much longer than anticipated, but I hope you guys enjoyed it and thank you everyone for sending in your thoughts and chats about this story ♥ Please make sure to read the warnings and prepare for a long last chapter! Enjoy!

Warnings: Yandere, Violence (Manhandling the reader, Killing of a fellow merman), Gore (Blood Mention, Teeth Mark mention, Mention of losing a leg), Reader breaking/giving up, Mermaids, Big monsters with big features, Possessiveness, Pregnancy, Mention of Abuse, Very long post

[Part 1] - [Part 2] - [Part 3] - [Part 4] - [Part 5]

»»———————— ♡ ————————««

Atreo's fascination for your wounds was sickening.

Not just on the surface of 'he put them there,' but also from the pain he induced by dragging his wet fingers over the still bleeding flesh, saltwater mingling with your blood. You let out a long, pained groan as he once again clawed deep in your shoulder, licking his lips while grinning like the madman he was. Even when you two were resting, he seemed hungry for more of the delicious milking you two did just minutes ago. Or had it been hours? Lost in the feeling of pain and pleasure you didn't know how long you had been lying on top of him, face planted in his chest and his hands roaming your sore and weeping body.

At least his breathing was helping you calm down. You had fallen asleep right after getting fucked by him, but you weren't spared his attention-seeking touches that woke you up in a bad mood. "You good, little coral?" he asked, his voice vibrating in his chest and causing goosebumps on your body. A shitty reaction, but after being thoroughly sensitized to him by now, who could blame you?

"- am not," you grumbled, barely able to raise your voice. "Water," you added laboriously, and Atreo's torso twisted beneath you. Not enough that it could throw you off—he was way too massive for that—but you felt every bone and muscle churn inside you as he did, causing you to hiss in pain.

Immediately he halted before his hands gripped your arms, forcing you to bend and move to his will. "What's wrong?" he demanded to know, and you could feel his concern and worry as you continued to groan in pain.

"Stop! Just stop!" you yelled at him. Miraculously, he listened to you. A small victory after being ignored many times before when you asked him to stop at any point prior to this. "Ah, fuck," you groaned, forcing your way up and off him with Atreo's help. His eyebrows furrowed as he rolled himself on top of you, propping his massive body on his arms at each side of your body. Atreo's genuine display of concern passed you as you kept moaning and feeling your wounds open and bleed again. But it was there, his touch against your cheek gentle as he called for your attention.

"Human…" he grumbled, forcing your head straight up again. But you could barely open both eyes, even when he carried the weight of your head in his hands for your relief, your body heating up even more against his cold skin. "Human, tell me what's wrong!"

His demand was dully noted by your throbbing head, but you let out a long sigh as you leaned into his palm, nuzzling it to spread the cold all over you. "It hurts," you complained softly, muttering into his hand. "Everything hurts…"

You didn't need him to touch your forehead to know you had a fever, even though it was still low. Naturally, your body was doing the best it could to help you, especially while you were always in danger with Atreo so near. But forcing at least one eye to open, glancing into his, he didn't seem to be so fearsome anymore. If anything, it was him who looked scared.

It was just for a moment, his expression turning serious almost immediately as he caressed your face carefully, soothingly spreading the natural cold of his body. Almost as if he was trying so hard to finally understand you better. "You are very warm… What do you need, pearl? Tell me what I have to do and I will."

God, if only you knew. Medicine, rest, protection. Everything except the last being things you wouldn't be able to get here. And even so, no protection from him. "Water," you repeated weakly, and Atreo reached over to the nightstand, taking the magical keg from it. It was a wonder that thing even survived the vicious fucking you two went through, feeling like Atreo trashed everything with his tails—including you. But he held up your head for you, so you wouldn't have to strain yourself, letting the water flow down your throat with a few gulps. It did help. A little bit, at least.

But not enough.

Taking a deep breath once the water cleared up and was removed from your throat, you looked over at Atreo, hovering over you and putting away the keg with a somber expression on his face. Very different from his usual chipper, egoistic or predatory demeanor. When his eyes flashed back to you, he lit up for a moment, his body tensing and showing off his refined muscles as if he was trying to woo you with his mighty appearance. However, he immediately returned from wanting to impress to being concerned again as you didn't react favorably, staring motionlessly in his direction. Hovering over you, he brought his face down, dragging his lips shallowly over your cheek and jaw. Hearing the rumble of a purr coming from him, soothed your mind, even if your body was unable to relax.

"Is it better?" he asked, and you let out a breath you didn't know you were holding, too exhausted to show all the tension and fear he installed in you. Slowly, you shook your head, and Atreo bared his fangs. Not in anger. Or at least not anger directed at you.

"I… We… What do you do about your wounds?" you asked him softly, hoping he'd not get mad at your question again. Instead of an answer, he scoffed, puffing his chest proudly, and you knew exactly what he would say. It was almost as if you knew him well already. "I don't get wounded," he announced, and if not for feeling weak, you might have laughed at the lie. You knew he had scars. Even if they were barely visible, you could feel them when you did touch him.

When you didn't answer, a weak smile the only thing changing about you, he looked away, roaming your body. The reflection in his eyes was a pitiful sight, but it humored you that his expression turned even grimmer the longer he looked at you. "Do they hurt? My… marks…" he asked hesitantly, reaching another finger out to caress them. You flinched. Hard. Maybe even before he touched you, but it was enough to make him recoil. His attention snapped to you, and you curled up in pain, be it physical or mental.

"I didn't want to- I…"

Well, that was new. You hadn't seen Atreo flustered or overwhelmed before, and you certainly didn't prefer it to his dominance and egotistical ways. Maybe things had changed. He did talk a lot about mates and life together. Pups, as he called it. You shuddered, remembering his love-drunk rambles while he plowed into you with no regard. Urgh, you really didn't want to think about the pain below your waistline, your brain mercifully hiding it to keep your sanity.

Atreo looked around now, and you weren't sure what he saw. It was hard to follow his quick movements, harsh twists and turns, but whatever it was that caught his eye, he only grew more concerned, it seemed. Exhausted, you let your head fall to the side, cushioned by a pillow. It was nighttime again, the room not very bright even with the blue lights above you. But the water surrounding the bed didn't look as clean anymore, and you had an inkling why.

Blood. Ew.

Yeah, you hated that. Especially since it was your blood. But it seemed to do the trick as it unsettled Atreo, even more than it unsettled you. "Are you still bleeding?" he asked, and you lazily lifted your arm, which you could feel throbbing even though you didn't doubt the other wounds looking just as poorly. Drips of blood fell from the injury, and Atreo almost paled. "It's not supposed to take this long to close…" he muttered, and you huffed, not needing to say anything to remind him you were human. His weird underwater logic wasn't applicable.

Taking a deep breath, you settled back into the bed completely, losing even the last bit of strength. Atreo moved into action much more rapidly than you thought he would, gathering the blanket he had thrown off in his mating frenzy. It was sopping wet, but he still placed it over you, shaking you ever so slightly as he moved to wrap it around you, even if you had to endure the stinging of your wounds. "I'll…" he mumbled, seemingly still thinking about what to do.

"I'll be back," he finally explained, having come to a conclusion as it seemed. "Don't leave, and be quiet while I'm gone, Mate."

You wanted to scream, "Of course I'm not going anywhere, you bastard!" but instead, you just grunted in understanding, your eyelids leaden. Everything seemed to want to knock you out these days, but you understood why. Reality wasn't better than your dreams. Atreo kept tugging you in some more, purring and smoothing the woven material over you until he could be sure you were dozing off comfortably. All with as much care and gentleness as he possibly could muster. You let out your breath as you heard him slither away, the water swapping around as he exited the room, and you suddenly felt very free with his presence gone. Enough so you could drift off to sleep in peace, not caring if it would be a good or bad dream you'd have.

»»—————♡

Stirred by the sound of water, you awoke, still dazed and uncoordinated. The blanket had kept you surprisingly warm, or perhaps the pain had saved you from thrashing and throwing it off, so it had time to heat. Time was a non-existent concept underwater, but you felt like you'd been out for a while and yet, not long enough. The aching all over your body hadn't ceased, but it felt like your wounds had closed at least, even if you felt no less dirty and hurt.

"Atreo…" you mumbled, wanting to scold him for waking you. When had you two become close enough that you thought you could scold him? Whatever. He made you into this mess, so he could endure some verbal lashes from you as well. You barely settled back against your pillows when you felt his weight creep up on top of you, hands falling to your sides. A palm cupped your cheek, thumb traveling from the tip of your nose over your lips that parted instinctively, but you forced them close quickly, getting nicked by his claw. Groaning over the new pain, you tried to open your eyes, finding them to be glued and crusty. You'd have to rub them first, so you merely sighed, still not strong enough to fight with him.

Much to your frustration, Atreo returned to licking your wounds, and you groaned, annoyed. "Pretty, pretty human," he mumbled, his voice so hoarse and growly, it felt weird against your skin. Peeling you out of your warm blanket, he nibbled at your shoulder, traveling to your collarbones and down to your tits, leaving a tickling sensation everywhere. You shuddered, feeling your anger rise until he found his way to your bite mark, tasting it with an appreciative chortle. You cried out briefly in pain as his tongue licked you incessantly.

His hand clasped over your mouth before the sound could even travel beyond the bed and you choked, suddenly robbed of air as the huge palm covered most of your face. "Shhh!" she hissed at you, and suddenly, things turned from weird to alarming. Forcing your eyes open, you expected your—your?—monstrous merman with his gray skin and endlessly dark eyes to look at you. But after the initial annoyance settled, your eyes finally managed to focus, snapping wide open when you met his gaze.

Not black, red. Clashing with the blue lights inside the nest. Instead of gray skin, the mermaid was much brighter, white almost, with pitch black markings dragging down his back and tail like a blanket. And he was large. Atreo was a huge monster, but this one should have barely fit the hole in the ground used as an entrance. You had no idea who he was, what he was, or why he was here. But for a moment, everything was silent, no bubbling water or loud breaths around you. The calm before the storm.

And before you knew it, you screamed.

Much, much louder than you ever had before.

Forcefully you were crashed into the bed, more brutal and crude than Atreo ever did it, perhaps caused by your assailant's size compared to Atreo's. Your body was already in pain before, but this sure as hell didn't help. Something cracked beneath you, and it was either the bed or your back. All you could think was fuck, fuck, fuck, and how you'd fit into this body wholly. It was massive, gigantic, absolutely enormous. Swallow-you-whole-sized. And now this giant body moved forward, his forehead bumping into yours while his eyes never closed to blink, only staring at you. "Shhhhhhhhhh!" he repeated himself, this time even more incessant, and you whimpered pitifully, tears shooting into your eyes, as a reaction to this intruder.

You had questions—so many of them. But even if you had a chance to talk, you probably wouldn't have been able to utter a word. "Do you want him to come and rip us both apart?" the unknown merman hissed, and your breath hitched as you realized who he was talking about. The situation really didn't look so good from an outsider's view. And you had tiredly promised Atreo to stay quiet and inside, though, to your credit, that's exactly what you did. But you didn't want to know how he'd interpret this situation.

So you shook your head as best as you could, and he huffed, his hand remaining. Still, he returned to your body, loosening the eye contact and returning to lap at what he could reach. "So tasty," he murmured, and you shuddered some more, goosebumps erecting all over your still intact skin. "And so… wasted."

The merman looked up, his expression less than subtly annoyed, and you could barely understand the reason. "I can't understand how he can toy with you like this and leave you to bleed out." Lips curling into a grin, he crooked his head to the side, a truly nasty expression on his face. "I thought only we orcas played with our food, but it seems we're not the only one."

"Helped me find you, though," he admitted, burying his massive head in your chest and taking a deep breath. "You have such a lovely smell. And you don't taste half bad either, even though I was surprised to find a live human."

You were still in a lot of shock, trying to understand everything he was saying and unable to look away from this new threat. For the first time, you wished Atreo was here. You didn't like how Atreo looked at you, but you realized you liked this… orca, even less. All you wanted was peace and quiet to heal and gather your strength. Why was there one disaster after the other coming for you?

Feeling the tears sting in your eyes, you bit your lip, trying to stay as quiet as possible as you sobbed into his palm. His expression didn't turn rueful, but also not confused as you cried like Atreo had. Just plain indifferent. "It hurts, doesn't it?" he asked you, plain and simple. A fact, rather than the question it was worded as. You nodded, and he let his eyes skim over you. "Can imagine. At least we eat our prey after playing."

His words weren't as comforting as he might have thought, though perhaps, he just didn't care. Too fast for your liking, a grin returned to his lips. There was nothing sincere about him, no expression and no action. A killer, psychopath, perhaps. He had no empathy for your misery. Instead, he reveled in it and his superiority that he believed to have over Atreo. And yet, you were foolish enough to listen as he spoke, fixing his gaze back on yours.

"Do you want to leave? Go back?"

Your eyes widened. Deep down, you knew that you couldn't trust these human impersonators. That mistrust must have shone through your eyes, and the merman grimaced in return. "Ah, come on," he chuckled. "No need to be so wary. I'll get you back to shore for, let's say, a small price."

Free hand falling to your leg, he dragged it down, briefly brushing past the bite mark there, and you shuddered. Not just from pain but from fear of his offer. He wasn't wrong. You could complain about how unfair it all was, especially that you had to pay for your freedom. Still, in the end, if leaving and getting out of this misery at only the price of your leg was an option, it was worth the risk. You just had to be put on a lively beach and you'd probably be saved before bleeding out. The pain didn't really matter in your consideration. Only survival and freedom, with or without your leg.

He could see you were considering it, his grin turning into a smirk as he was probably thinking about his dinner. It would be double the victory, taking you from the sharks and getting to eat human meat even if it wouldn't be much. But from what you gathered, he seemed to like playing more than actually feeding. Maybe it was a mad deal. Perhaps you were an idiot for thinking this could work. It was still at least your leg on the line. But you gently muttered the word he wanted to hear into his palm, "Okay."

You must have gone completely insane to agree, but as your situation turned out to be, it was either this, dying, or staying with Atreo—possibly until you die pitifully in this underwater home because of him or even worse: old age. The thought alone of spending the rest of your life here, bored until you go crazy, was scary enough to make the price worth the loss.

"Then," he muttered, tapping his fingers to his lips. You cringed, remembering what Atreo did to supply you with oxygen. The orca grinned wider, seeing your eyes drip with disgust. "I think you know what to do."

He finally let you go, retracting his hand and allowing you to take a deep breath. It was appalling to think you'd have to cling to him, rely on the air of this stranger. But there were crazier things you were going to do than this. Like sacrificing your leg. Maybe when you got to shore, you'd manage to kick him and make a run for it. That was unless you were too far from the beach and had to swim. There was no way you could race him if it came down to that. Reaching forward, you ignored all the sore bones and strained muscles trying to hold you back, aiming for his huge neck to hold on to.

However, before you could find a grip on his body, he suddenly jerked, his eyes widening once again. Though this time, it wasn't in intimidation, and it wasn't fear or domination as he didn't even look at you. It was an expression you knew well, perhaps too well.

Fuck.

In a matter of seconds, limbs were flying, claws were grabbing at everything around you, and you let out a horrified scream as you cowered into yourself, watching as the merman was dragged out of the nest, briefly getting stuck in the hole because of his size before being pulled through it regardless. Cold wet slapped into your face, keeping you in the present, the water level rising briefly as you could watch the fish outside the nest hurriedly swimming away.

And then, in a cloud of blood and stirred-up sand, two massive bodies mingled.

No, not two. More, with new ones joining by the heartbeat.

You couldn't breathe, couldn't stop looking. It reminded you of those wildlife documentaries of piranhas swarming around the chicken those reporters would hang into the water. The tumbleweed of bodies must have started beneath the nest but now was floating upwards, coaxing you to follow, to keep watching. But it hurt too much. Your whole body ached to move, and the bed was unsteady after enduring both Atreo and the orca.

Luckily—or in your case, unluckily for you—you didn't need to wait long.

Perhaps a few more breaths until a shadow dropped to the ground. Before you could lean forward to see who it was, something jumped out of the water, ramming into you with full force and throwing you back into the pillows. This time, you opened your eyes right away, knowing whose face it was hanging in front of you, dripping seawater on you. Atreo seemed crazed, completely mad as he bared his fangs, his visage deformed by aggression. Not surprising after the fight, but still scary to witness.

You ducked away from him as he kept glowering at you viciously. Was it guilt? Or maybe just the submission he had bitten into you? But when he opened his mouth, you expected him to scold you and ask why you agreed to the deal. What you were doing with the orca. Instead, he grabbed your shoulders, squeezing them tightly.

"Mine!" he yelled furiously, his eyes falling from yours to your neck, arm, and side. Everywhere he bit while screaming "Mine! Mine! Mine!" repeatedly.

"You're mine, do you understand?!"

Shaking you, you couldn't hold back the tears, sobbing uncontrollably. What should you do? What would appease him? Was he angry with you, or was this just his way of assuring himself you were still here with him? How could you make this right?

Without thinking, you forced your arms up, even against the grip on your shoulders he had. His strength was unmatched, but you had to do what you could with your limited reach. Crying, sobbing, you threw yourself at him, hugging him tightly and squeezing your eyes shut. If he was angry enough to throw you off him and into a wall, you didn't want to see it.

"Yours!" you yelled, agreeing with him against your will and better judgment. "I am yours!"

And against your expectations… that did it.

You felt his wet, scaly tail wrap around your legs, snaking all the way up to your hips, and Atreo's hands fell from your shoulders to your back, allowing you to cling to him. "That's right," he muttered, rubbing his face into your hair while you shook. "All mine."

The two of you remained like this for a while, every other thought than appeasing your captor banished from your mind. "I fell asleep… I was so tired. I didn't know," you sobbed against his neck, feeling all the scales running down from under his hair. But you continued to nuzzle up to him, even dragging your tender cheek against his gills affectionately. "You reached for him," he confronted you, and you sobbed harder. What now? Would Atreo believe a lie?

But before you could attempt to escape the grizzly fate you had already created in your mind, he hugged you tighter against his chest, whispering his words so quietly you almost didn't hear them. "I thought I lost you. That he'd take you with him. That you'd leave me…"

"No," you breathed. Liar. "Never."

"That's right." Atreo noticeably relaxed, the tension leaving his muscles. "How dare that bastard comes for you! He should have never gone so far as to touch you!"

He believed it. You couldn't believe it. Atreo always seemed so skeptical and wary around you. Declaring you as his mate really did change him. Good for you.

At least as good as this situation was.

Even though he seemed hesitant to let go, he eventually pushed you away, caressing your face for a second before letting his eyes roam over you, checking you. You let him do as he pleased and tried to help lift your arms and legs when you could, but now that the tension seemed to fade, it felt almost worse. The question nagging on you, you decided to ask when he turned you around to examine your back, probably searching for traces of his enemy. Though aside from the bruises his actions probably caused you, there wouldn't be so much to see.

"Is he dead?" you asked, whispering softly. Careful not to make yourself look guilty by showing too much worry. Instead, you opted for playing scared and intimidated. Once again, he believed you, and you counted that as a total success. With his massive arms wrapping around you, Atreo pressed you against him in a way of comforting you, purrs rumbling in his chest, and you touched his arm, feigning thankfulness for his protection.

"He won't bother you ever again," he revealed, and you were surprised that he didn't boast and show off his victory. You had a hunch that by the looks of it, other mermaids had joined the tussle, and it wouldn't be a surprise if the orca was simply overpowered in the end. Kind of felt bad. But knowing Atreo would give up his victory of tearing the orca apart himself to be with you was… dreadful.

Picking you up, he wanted to settle you in, but felt the broken parts of his bed as he leaned on it and growled in frustration. Instead, he pulled you on his lap and, from a pouch you hadn't noticed being thrown through the room before, fished out a small box of what seemed like ointment. It smelled like a punch to your gut, but you tried to swallow the bile rising in your throat as Atreo began smearing it all over your body.

He wasn't frugal with coating the cuts and bruises he could find, though he did hesitate at his marks. It was clear that he didn't want or intended to let them fade away, but eventually, Atreo overcame his hesitations, applying a light layer of his mermaid medicine.

Once that was done, the stench wasn't as putrid or noticeable anymore, probably shut out by your senses to endure it. Atreo grabbed the blanket again, wrapping it around you until you were warm and cozy. Using his body to make up for the broken parts of the bed, he rested you on top of him, and you yawned, the happenings nothing short of exhausting in all possible ways. The whole adventure had been exhausting, with you being in constant pain and enduring threats to your life that you didn't even wish on your worst enemy. But here you were, still alive, no inch closer to the freedom of living your normal human life.

You were done with it. Even if you tried, you didn't think you could fight it. You hated it, and it felt like you were disappointing everyone, especially yourself. But there was just so much pain and fear involved that you could no longer handle resisting. Atreo was winning. Slowly but surely, he had been breaking you, cracking your will whenever he could. When Atreo spoke next, cradling you against his chest like a child, asking, "Who do you belong to?" you replied in his favor.

"You."

"Who?"

"You, Atreo."

"Who?"

You yawned. "You. Always."

"That's right."

His hand was a mix of cold and comfort against your back, gently rubbing it and effectively lulling you into sleep. All you wanted was to fall asleep and wake up from this nightmare for real this time. Pretend like nothing happened and maybe come to your senses in a hospital after you swallowed too much seawater. Maybe it was just a coma dream after all.

And if not? You'd try. Try to get hurt less, try to endure your new life, and gain the favors of anyone who'd come to you, especially Atreo. There was no use trying to escape on your own again, and no one else would probably dare to come over for a while after what happened to the orca. But even if you could just have the chance to heal, maybe that would help you start a new fight and find your way out.

From now on, it could only get better.

There was only room for improvement in your situation. You couldn't sink any deeper than the bottom of the ocean you had already reached.

»»—————♡

You thought.

But as the curious faces of countless mermaids of all ages peered into the nest with translucent walls that Atreo called your home, you remembered your thoughts of that night bitterly.

With your belly swollen, you were due to give birth soon. Birth to the first child of the pack leader and his chosen mate. Atreo's hand cupped yours, rubbing over your abdomen housing and creating his kid. He already knew, way back when the orca tried to help you, what he had done to your body. Being extra careful now that you were carrying his spawn to term. Pup, that's the word he used for it.

Turned out it was a whole tribe event when someone was pregnant, and Atreo loved showing you off. You had to beg for privacy and clothing to cover yourself with. You got neither, and it took a long time to get used to the ogling of just as naked half-humans as you were. From morning till night, merfolk looked at you, waiting, hoping to catch a glimpse. As if it wasn't enough that the idea of their leader with a human was already perceived with scorn, they laughed at you with no shame at the size your belly grew to accommodate the monster inside or at your tiny little legs and the way you were fed by hand since Atreo wouldn't let you do anything on your own.

It would be a water birth. So much you had decided. A proper spectacle that fitted someone as eccentric as Atreo was for abandoning traditions and taking you as his mate. Everything else, from your diet to exercise, had been directed and conducted by Atreo, and you spent your whole pregnancy either in his arms or in your bed, suffering with little to no relief from modern medicine. Though, to his credit, he brought you to the surface a few times—when he felt like you deserved it—so you could swim around until you were exhausted.

There was nothing around you when you breached the water. Just... ocean. No mountains or harbors in sight. It was terrifying. You doubted the orca could have helped you—would have helped you. It was probably just a way of playing with you for his amusement. Being able to swim around for a while was almost healing after being stuck below the surface for so long. But everything else was as despairing as it could be. You always felt hundreds of eyes watching you aside from Atreo now. Waiting, curious and famished. You almost considered it lucky if this pregnancy was going to kill you in the end, but Atreo seemed to have a different opinion.

"You're going to be such a good parent," he purred, stroking your plump tummy. His eyes roamed from your belly to your breasts, just as ready and eager to have this baby as you were to get it out of you. His gaze went from affectionate to excited, and you knew he could barely wait for a taste. So far, you had denied it to him, saying it was all for the baby, and he seemed to respect that at least. Who'd know if your baby would even drink milk? This was as new for you as it was for the merfolk who were wholly underprepared for your kind of pregnancy. But Atreo was excited regardless. Nothing and no one could destroy his happiness, it seemed, not even his fellow merman and maids teasing him about his choice of mate and strange child that was soon to be welcomed into the tribe.

"And then we can finally…"

His sentence drifted off, as did his hand, below your belly and between your legs. Credit to him, he seemed to understand that the massiveness he could fill you was a bit too harsh for your pregnant body. It didn't save you from bites and arguments while your hormones were raging. But he became a little more agreeable, and perhaps that was the only perk of pregnancy and the most freedom to act and speak your mind you'd ever get in your life again. Unless you were forced into another pregnancy, that is.

Swatting his hand away, you glowered at him, reminding him with a subtle nod about the onlookers. Atreo pursed his lips and let out a long, annoyed sigh. As if he was the one suffering and not you. Idiot.

"When do you think it's time?" he asked you, back to grinning from ear to ear like the proud dad he was.

"Not sure. A week? A month?"

He sighed again, this time in longing. He was much too excited for an event you were not. And if you were honest, as much as you wanted the baby gone from inside you, you'd probably miss being treated almost decent by Atreo as long as you were pregnant. And you really could refrain from babymaking ever again if you were to survive the pregnancy. Because Atreo wanted more. He told you as much. Seven, eight. A couple dozen if your body would do it. You had no idea how long merfolk supposedly lived, but he said it as if it was the most natural thing in the world. His world. And yours now, too, sadly.

"It'll come when it comes. You can't rush these things–"

A sudden sting in your abdomen and you felt water that was certainly not the one swapping around you gushed out. You stared at the wall in horror, meeting the curious eyes of a younger mermaid. She cocked her head to the side, not understanding what was happening.

You can't rush. And you can never expect these things.

That's how your life was now. And you'd sink deeper and deeper no matter what you did. Even if you thought you had reached the bottom of the ocean, there was another hole opening up for you to slip into.

And Atreo would follow you, no matter where and how far he had to go.

All for his mate.

336 notes · View notes

lotusmi · 1 year

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whew, so this is a LOT for me right now, I felt really down about the void because I kept trying and couldn't enter yet I came across the post about the DMT video where everybody seemed to get either lucid dreams or enter the void. I read that the video will at least give you something, so I was really excited to try it since I thought that the fact that Almost every post I read is about somebody getting some time of results from the video ,I would too. But to my disappointment nothing happened, I tried again and again yet nothing. this is making me very frustrated and I'm bringing my anger on everybody around me, I'm hating on my family members and blaming my religion because I think its the reason why everyone can enter but I can't. I feel like crying because whenever I try for the void and it didn't work I would brush it off and not care even though deep down it hurt. Time is going soo fast and I'm scared I won't manifest in time , at the beginning of the school year when we had a four day weekend I was like this is my time to shine yet nothing happened, I didn't give up hope and decided to try again during winter break, yet to no avail and now its spring break and the school year is basically done and I couldn't even get one wish granted from my wish list,I'm scared the spring break is the last long Break I have to make I change, What if it doesn't work, then I spent a whole school year basically getting nothing. I really feel like the spring break is my LAST chance because there is so many things I wanted to happen that I still have hope can happen if i just enter the void.

dude, if you expect me to pet your head while you had the audacity to write me all this text obessing over the void you were very wrong...

I am very firstly just start saying AGAIN that I am not a void blogger and all those void shit are not my business at all and it seems that you did not even read the posts I made about the void, I know if you did read you would not be despaired like that.

"I read that the video will at least give you something, so I was really excited to try it since I thought that the fact that Almost every post I read is about somebody getting some time of results from the video''

NOTHING in the outside world has more power than you. And there's nothing to change or 'expect' to save you. Nothing outside of YOU can save YOU because the creative power of the whole universe is in your imagination. You do not need the void, a method, a sub, you NEED yourself.

"The great importance of knowing all you need to tap into the void is SELF is that you will stop checking new subliminals, new methods, seeking for information or trying to wonder what you are doing 'wrong'. You have to go straight to the wish fulfilled feeling, you change SELF. All you are searching for is Self." READ THIS POST!!!!!!!

"But to my disappointment nothing happened, I tried again and again yet nothing"

Yes of course, and nothing would NEVER change if you won't change your assumptions about yourSELF. This is not even about the void anymore. As you keep this state of never getting in the void or even this state of 'my life is shit' shit will keep happening to you and this is never going to stop unless YOU DECIDE TO. 'tried tried tried' I don't want you to try anything, you don't have to try. You just have to accept a completely new concept (assumption) about this by deciding you are at your new, desired state. Creation is finished, it is done. There's nothing to create. You just have to understand it is done. And if you read my posts, you would know I would recommend you revising this 'failure' as it never happened, don't accept it! By keep thinking and thinking you are only creating more failure, you can revise or ignore, but keep dweling in failure like a victim will imply your victim state.

"this is making me very frustrated and I'm bringing my anger on everybody around me, I'm hating on my family members"

I don't even know what to comment. This is not your family problem, it is yours. Why keep putting the fault in others? You should be embarassed of guilt trip others like that when you are The Creator of your reality.

"I think its the reason why everyone can enter but I can't"

well the problem will NEVER be outside. It's always within. So it there's any reason, the reason is you. You are the Cause. "The entire outer world is solely produced by imagining." + The power in you is the exactly same power in everyone that succeeded. The difference are the assumptions you hold.

"Time is going soo fast and I'm scared I won't manifest in time"

Time is not real and fear is an illusion. + Creation is DONE. There's no such a thing as not having time. You have to understand that manifesting is done in IMAGINATION and there's no past or future in the mind, there's only NOW. So assume you are and have what you want NOW.

"yet nothing happened"

Nothing happens 'out of nowhere'. You have to assume in your favour. You have the power. No one is coming to save you or to pick you and put you in the void. YOU have to take control.

"I couldn't even get one wish granted from my wish list"

You are the only creator in your reality, if you had knew that your imagination was your real reality and accepted your desired there by fulfilling within your desires, ALL your wishes would be granted now. ��Dwelling on past irritations or hurts perpetuates them and creates a vicious circle that serves to confirm these negative emotions.” Neville Goddard

"I'm scared the spring break is the last long Break I have to make I change, What if it doesn't work, then I spent a whole school year basically getting nothing."

What you won't see is that the future is being made by you RIGHT NOW. It's not some random crazy thing that will happen to you. But what you assume to your life. Again, there's nothing to change outside of you, all you have to change is yourself, within. EVERYTHING STARTS FROM WITHIN, YOUR IMAGINATION. + Why are you concerning by it won't working at this point? Literally, I already said that you have to start ignoring those doubts, you already know that doubts are not real and you should not pay attention to any of those annoying thoughts since thoughts DONT manifest. What you accept and identify yourself as being or having DO. You are literally assuming failure to your future omg...

"I really feel like the spring break is my LAST chance because there is so many things I wanted to happen"

Why would it be the 'last chance'? This does not even has any sense at all. You can revise all your past literally as you want. + Just assume those things already happened in your future

"I still have hope can happen if i just enter the void"

The void is just a method. Omg. Stop obesessing over it. You can have all you want my fulfilling your desires within. Stop putting a method in a pedestral. This literally looks soo unhealthy not gonna lie. Work in your Self Concept, manifest without the void WHILE attempting to tap, learn better about the law. Read this, this, this, this.

"All changes must first come from within himself; and if he does not change on the outside it is because he has not changed within. But man does not like to feel that he is solely responsible for the conditions of his life" - Neville Goddard

#loa advice #neville goddard #law of assumption #loa blog #loa tumblr #living in the end #manifesting #lotus's advices #the void #the void state #void state

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rainbowchewynuggets · 1 year

Text

TMA Encore #12

Jon stares down into the gaping corpse of the prison. A stale air current breathes coldly on his neck.

Jon: If this tape has reached any of the members of my team, I would hope that they’d understand that I’m choosing to remove myself from the board to prevent something terrible. And that I’m sorry for doing it. And for everything, really. I… I should have told you all what was happening from the beginning. At the time, I told myself that it was for the better. But I’m realizing that I have a poor metric for those sorts of choices. I knew something was wrong early on and kept it to myself anyway. It was just easier to pretend that I could handle it myself. Clearly not.

He tries to summon some levity, but his throat is too tight.

Jon: You deserved better. You deserved to know.

He squeezes the little silver lighter in his other hand.

Jon: If you haven’t found this tape, it might be because we’re all still down here together. I shouldn’t do it, after all we’ve done to try to make it through this. I don’t want to. I’d just be making the same mistake all over again. But here I am.

He looks at the lace of fuse cord sticking out of each stick of dynamite, maybe six inches from the lighter’s flame.

Jon: It shouldn’t feel this easy. I should be in a much worse place mentally to even consider either option. It just… feels logical. As much as I’d like to blame an external force, I think that would be too easy. The point might be entirely moot, since I can’t seem to light this fuse any more than I can throw myself off. I can’t get myself to back away, either. Maybe I’m just waiting for a cue. A scare or something to let me know when it’s time to get going. Always seems to do the trick.

He can’t think of any more quips to distract himself. He can’t think of anything to say at all. He stops the recording and sets the player down on the ground beside him. The lighter thumps nervously against his leg as he scans the black void at the base of the Panopticon.

Not-Jon: Hello, Jonah.

Jonah meets him with his most unsurprised look.

Jonah: Nice to finally meet the creature that’s been stalking me.

Not-Jon allows himself no reaction beyond a difficult swallow.

NJ: Old habit.

Jonah looks him up and down. Not-Jon’s eyes are locked on him.

Jonah: Are you quite alright? You look uncomfortable.

Not-Jon strains to stand up straighter against the wall. Jonah waits for him to move, but he remains struggling to stay propped up where he is.

NJ: I suppose I should have thought to lock up the archives.

Jonah: Just figured I’d give you a hand. An ambitious design requires careful execution.

He steps back and rests against the opposite wall, facing the strange creature.

Jonah: Though, I must admit that I’m impressed. I never imagined you could become such a willing propagator for your patrons. Especially after what I heard on those tapes.

NJ: “Willing” with no other choice.

His voice is hard and sharp.

NJ: This way, they’re all likely to make it out alive. I at least haven’t stooped to sacrificing bystanders and victims.

Jonah: A credible threat reaps the same benefits, whether it’s followed through or not. You know that. There isn’t really room for ethics in our line of work.

Not-Jon is miserably silent.

Jonah: And I’m afraid you may have pushed some of your pieces a little too far.

Jonah takes out the three fragments of the ring. Not-Jon gives them a long look before tearing his eyes away back to Jonah.

NJ: Oh. Well. That would explain why this is so much harder than I thought it would be.

His sardonic tone can’t disguise the shaking in his voice. He gasps, winded from talking.

Jonah closes his fingers and moves to the back of the tower.

Not-Jon attempts to follow. He can barely move his feet and has to slide along the wall by one shoulder. Jonah reaches behind the cavernous remains of the stairs and pulls out a shotgun. He takes a shell from his pocket and loads it, then points the nose of the barrel at Not-Jon at point blank range. Fear is plain on his target’s face. He lets the moment sit, drinking it in.

The gun fires. The slug shatters bone and burrows into Not-Jon’s chest. Gunpowder burns the exposed flesh. He doubles over like a crumpled piece of paper. One hand holds the wound, the other is pressed against the floor with his legs bunched under him. He grits his teeth as he clings to his last ounce of strength, which threatens to leave him with each passing moment.

Jonah takes a step closer and kneels to meet the creature’s burning hateful eyes.

Jonah: It must be terrible. After all that careful planning and work, some underestimated detail arrives at the last minute and puts you back in your place.

Not-Jon wheezes painfully.

Jonah notices a running feeling in his hands. The broken ring has turned to dust, its illusory purpose served. Jonah processes this a second too late.

Not-Jon’s defeated act vanishes. He lunges and clasps his hands around Jonah’s throat. They struggle and hit the floor. Jonah is pinned as Not-Jon chokes him, vaporized blood rising from his hands.

NJ: It really is terrible, isn’t it?

Not-Martin’s concentration is broken. His sight turns probingly in the direction of the central watchtower.

NM: Oh, god.

Using Jonah’s sphere of influence as a gateway, the Entities push outward, overextending themselves. Not-Jon’s awareness expands beyond the Institute. Far, far beyond. He can see and feel the presence of the competing Entities’ places and objects of power. Their prowling avatars. Their euphoria. Their malice. The fear, misery, and ruin they create. Despite all that he’s done to dilute it, it saturates the earth. It seeps through endless fissures made between worlds, waiting only for enough points of cohesion to bring the Entities through.

The interference is agony. His head is filled with splintering wood.

He can’t stop here. He has to get rid of all of it. No trace can be left behind.

It can’t wait any longer. It’s the only way.

The only way.

Tim and Sasha are lost in the dark. They were at opposite ends of a complicated room when the flashlight ate through its last battery. They can’t find each other. A rushing sound approaches them with a flash of blinding light.

Not-Martin grabs hold of his younger double just before the flash floods their tiny cell.

————

Next comes the scary part.

First

Index

#the magnus archives #mag200 spoilers #magnus pod #tma fancomic #jonathan sims #martin blackwood #sasha james #tim stoker #jonah magnus #elias bouchard #not-jon #not-martin #the entities #tma encore 12 #cw suicide #cw violence #cw gun violence #cw blood #cw body horror

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theageofsims · 29 days

Text

The Age of Sims 2.7 - Part 12- "Lost in the City" LANGUAGE WARNING

To be cold, hungry, and lost in the city was a trouble that William did not have. While he wasn't getting the home grown food he was used to, he was still able to get by with what was available to him -- and the cold was hardly an issue since he had felt numb when it came to his nephew since his disappearance.

No matter how many times he tried to make himself understand or the few times Gloria had reminded him -- he still blamed himself for the beaten path that Peter had found himself going down. He broke a promise that was worth breaking -- a promise he should have never made to him in the first place, and on one hand he was solid on his decision... until the guilt started to creep in and he flipped his approach on the subject.

----------

"You're lucky I answered."

"I thought I'd save you the trouble -- any luck?" "Don't you think if I had any I would have called?" His tone flat. "We can't trust that you would because you kept a secret from us once before."

"Alright -- wait a minute. I made a promise to someone who wouldn't even need to confide in me if his own father would have pulled his head out of his ass 28 years ago." He said angrily as the stress of the situation began to rile him up. "Do you think I expected him to come banging on my front door during a routine college break?"

"You know he always thought highly of you."

"Once upon a time when he was a little boy. Once he started growing up I was just his uncle who had a stick up his ass about everything--" He paused as he heard her laugh, "Yeah -- laugh it up, Kath."

"It's hard not to. I don't think any of us have ever seen you laid back... carefree... at peace." She trailed on, trying to find memories of their life together that could possibly prove what she was saying -- completely wrong, but she kept coming up empty handed. "It's just who you are."

"Yeah well, it's a damn good thing I am who I am -- at least I'm on top of things so the kid's got a fighting chance."

"Look William, I don't know how much you expect me to do when it comes to Peter. Unlike you, I haven't retired completely and neither has Nash. On top of that we've got two dogs and I ended up watching Noah for longer than originally planned because you can't seem to stop disrespecting his mother--"

"That woman has no idea how much more that kid needs. All she does is bounce around from here to there, living the glamour life in Del Sol Valley -- yet still can't make it beyond soap ads! We should NOT be raising HER child--"

"THEIR child." She corrected him, "And you need to cut her some slack--"

"No. I'm not cutting her anymore slack than I already have. When you're taking care of Noah it's just you and your husband. When I'm taking care of him, it's Bella and I -- you don't know how frustrating that woman is especially when she disappears or stays out later than planned."

"What are you saying, William?"

"That I'm doing the fucking best that I can. I haven't got a live-in partner that is willing to help me raise Noah half of the year. The best I can do is allow her to stay in my house -- which is where her and Noah are at this very moment." He inhaled sharply, suddenly bothered by that reality more than he probably ever realized before.

"I would think you'd appreciate having the company instead of being alone all the time--"

"I'm not alone!" He snapped, now so far deep in a bad mood.

"Well I just assumed--"

"Don't." He shot back.

"Well, I mean... I'm sure she would understand why you have Bella staying--"

"Of course she understands. She's a very understanding person!"

He heard his ex wife sigh over the phone. A sigh he had heard her make a million times during their decades long marriage.

"I don't know what you want me to say--"

"Don't say anything. We both have made adjustments to our lives because Peter can't get his shit together and his son would have suffered greatly if we hadn't stepped up to the plate -- but in the meantime the kid's mother should do what she signed herself up to be -- a mother, and more importantly -- that loud mouth in the background should have stepped up to be a fucking father to his son from day one!"

"William--"

"Do me a favor -- don't fucking call me while you've got that asshole there."

"Will--" She tried, but it was too late. He had already hung up.

#the age of sims #sims 4 #sims 4 story #ts4

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ihopesocomic · 10 months

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It's awful that people are trashtalking something you've clearly worked hard on because of a video that I thought was actually harmless and very helpful. What makes it worse for me is that you both spoke up from a place of oppression and yet you're getting 'if only you'd kept your traps shut and let me enjoy my cartoon lions, then i'd respect you and your work'? Disgusting. I can tell how done you both are with this situation and I think I speak for everyone when I say I don't blame you at all.

I think my favorite part of the whole thing was we weren't even the first and only people to make a lot of the points we made in our video. And all those people who said it first were quickly dogpiled and didn't say anything afterward until we posted our video. It was really something witnessing whole-ass adults saying how amazing MP is for its "mature themes" and "good representation" of queer/disabled people, while in the same breath ridiculing those who come from one or both of those groups who dare try to point out serious flaws (it doesn't really matter whether the fans are also queer/disabled, you just. Don't do that when you're an adult? That's shit I expect from children.)

So frankly we're tired of it. Its unacceptable, and too many of them are well into their 20's. Everyone else who is a MP fan has had perfectly normal reactions and discussions with us, I don't know why everyone else takes it so personally to the point they have to defend objectively harmful tropes just because their favorite pointy lion is attached to it.

Everything RJ has said before, and in my case, what, am I not allowed to point out tired old offensive lesbian tropes? Because I've been doing it a long time, and I'm gonna keep doing it until people stop making offensive lesbian stereotypes LOL (And like I've said before, these are stereotypes that were old years before MP came out. Guess that's on me for assuming people would care about butch lesbians in the year our lord 2020.) I'm not gonna stop just because you happen to like the show. You can either listen or not. It doesn't help that MP is a lot of peoples' first exposure to queer characters in animation. And since it's made by professionals, why would they doubt it, am I right? lol

I've talked about how I'd fix Hover many times, and none of those times had been what we're currently doing with Storm. It would be easy to turn Hover into a character that's closer to myself and call it original. But guess what, I'm not the only kind of butch lesbian out there. I wanted to show appreciation to the kings out there that aren't taller than their girlfriends, that don't have the deepest voices, or the biggest muscles. Cuz contrary to popular belief, butches are diverse. Which means we aren't crass chucklefucks who abuse our partners. You'd think that'd go without saying, but here we are. Not only does it STILL happen in media, but an off-putting amount of people relate to Hover, or like her without bothering to understand why a character like Hover would be offensive to some of us.

Which is all it boils down to. We've been very consistent with our opinions for the last 3 years and people make the exact same arguments against us. They don't want to learn, because if they did, they'd at least acknowledge what we have to say instead of making assumptions every single time we mention MP. - Cat

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reidingandwriting · 4 months

Text

when (s)he sees me, part two > p.p.

Word Count: 1.8k

Ship: Peter Parker x Reader

Warnings: Hurt/comfort, mentions of an unhealthy family dynamic (parents divorcing, mention of child abandonment)

The after effects of Peter's love confession that didn't quite go as planned. You had reacted... negatively to say the least. After some time apart, you decide it's time to talk to Peter again.

Link to post on AO3

✨ Masterlist ✨

Part One

Monday. Your first day back at school since you broke up with Peter- your first time seeing him since you broke his heart. You had turned your phone off Friday morning; you skipped school Friday and between MJ, Ned, and Peter, your phone had continuously gone off for several minutes.

You were greeted by twenty missed calls and seventy-five texts when your phone powered to life. Ten calls from Peter, five calls from May, three from MJ and two from Ned. Several texts from Peter and your friends, a handful from May, and even one from Tony Stark. The last text you had gotten from Peter had been Saturday night, the most recent ones from MJ, and you quickly scrolled through her texts as you walked out of your apartment. Once you made it outside, you were surprised to see MJ standing on the sidewalk.

“MJ? What are you doing here?”

“What am I- what am I doing here? You don’t answer any of my calls or texts for four days and you wonder what I’m doing? What the hell happened, Y/N?” MJ asked and you ducked your head as you noticed the attention you two were getting.

“I’m sorry,” you said after a moment. “Let’s.. Let’s walk and I’ll explain.” As the two of you began the walk to school, you started to recount everything that had happened. You told her about the dinner with Peter, from Tony Stark picking you up until you got home that night. Your eyes stung with unshed tears when you told MJ about Peter’s love confession, and MJ draped an arm over your shoulder.

“So that’s why you’ve been ignoring all of us. Shit, can’t say I blame you. What are you gonna do? When you see Peter today?” MJ asked.

“Hide. And cry. A lot of hiding and crying is on the agenda for today.” You sighed. “I know I should talk to him. I want to. But I don’t deserve the chance to talk to him again.” You flinched as MJ flicked your forehead and you brought your hand to your head. “Ow!”

“Don’t be an idiot. You should talk to him. Not for yourself, but he deserves closure.” MJ knew enough about your family to understand why you had reacted the way you did, but she also cared about you and Peter both, and she was unafraid to call you out. You knew Peter deserved the closure, you knew it. But actually facing him? Easier said than done.

“I will, I will. If he even lets me talk to him. You didn’t see him, MJ. Every time I close my eyes, I keep seeing his face after I ended things. After I told him I didn’t love him when there’s no one in the world I’ve ever loved more.”

“Sappy.” MJ teased and you scoffed. “Maybe try not hiding when you see him and tell him that. He wants to talk to you, you and I both know he does. You may have to talk to him first, but.”

“I owe him that much,” you said.

“You do,” MJ agreed. “Or I’ll lock you both in a room until you talk to each other.” MJ’s threat was not one you wanted to test her on, because you knew she’d do it. You and MJ continued to talk as you walked to school and you slowed to a stop when you saw Peter and Ned a few feet away. MJ called your name then followed your gaze, and she frowned when she saw the two boys. “C’mon. Let’s go inside.” You nodded and dropped your gaze to the ground as you followed MJ inside, and you did your best to ignore the burning feeling of Peter’s gaze on you.

“Are you gonna talk to them?” Ned asked and Peter kept his gaze ahead until you were no longer in sight. “Peter.”

“Hmm?” Peter looked over at Ned who frowned. “Sorry. I don’t know.” Peter sighed. “I don’t know if I can handle them running away from me again.” The sting of rejection still felt fresh, the weight heavy in Peter’s chest. “If they come up to me… I don’t know. Maybe. You didn’t see them, Ned. It’s like I was looking at a stranger instead of the person I had been dating, the person I was in love with.” The person I am in love with. “Come on, we’re going to be late to class.” At least I have until third period before I have to see Y/N.

Third period came by too quickly for Peter’s liking. Peter busied himself with flipping through his physics textbook as you took a seat beside him. Assigned seating, gotta love it. Peter felt your gaze on him and it took all of his self control to keep his eyes ahead of him. Luckily, class started shortly and Peter heard you sigh before your gaze shifted off him as you started to take notes.

Halfway through class, a folded piece of scrap paper ended up on Peter’s notebook. Peter quickly glanced over at you and he noticed a torn corner on the page you were writing on. Peter quietly unfolded the paper and read the words written on it.

Our spot during gym?

Peter glanced over at you again, this time meeting your gaze. He nodded once before he looked back at his notes, and he felt… anxious. Hopeful. Terrified? All of the above. Peter looked up at the clock. Just a few hours until he talked to you again. God, was he ready to face you again?

Spider-Son: I’m so nervous, I could throw up

Spider-Son: You should come check me out, Mr. Stark

Why am I checking you out?

Spider-Son: Y/N

Spider-Son: They want to talk to me during gym

Shit.

You don’t want to talk to them?

Spider-Son: I do. But I’m also scared to. I’m scared to hear what they have to say. What if they want to apologize?

Would you?

If you need me to, I can get you. I have some time before my next meeting

Spider-Son: I don’t know what I will do

Spider-Son: I want to leave.

Spider-Son: But

Spider-Son: But I need to hear them out

Okay, kid. Call me if things go south, I’ll send Happy to come get you

Are you still coming over after school? DUM-E misses you

Spider-Son: I’ll be there :D

Peter took a seat across from you in the library study room. You and him were the only people to ever use the study rooms, and you both frequented them whenever you needed some peace and quiet. The librarians loved you and Peter, so they rarely bothered you when you were inside.

“Hey,” you said after a moment, and Peter looked up at you.

“Hi.” The silence that used to be comfortable between you two felt awkward, suffocating. The tension in the room was thick enough to cut with a knife and you took a deep breath.

“Thank you. For meeting me. You didn’t have to, and I know I don’t deserve it. I’d like to explain myself for what happened Thursday night. You don’t have to talk, but I’d like for you to listen. If you don’t want to listen, you can walk out right now and I won’t hold it against you. But I would like to explain why I reacted the way I did, if you’ll hear me out.” What felt like an eternity of silence passed before Peter spoke again.

“Okay.”

“You know I live with my older sister?” You asked and Peter nodded. “My parents weren’t happy together. They constantly fought, and as I got older, the fights got worse. My father blamed me and my mother just. Pretended I didn’t exist. At the end of last year, my father finally had enough and there was a huge fight before he left. The things he said… they stuck with me. My mother packed up and left in the middle of the night a week after, and I’ve lived with my sister since.” Your voice wavered.

“I’ve never seen a healthy relationship, Peter. I’ve never seen two people who really love each other. My whole perception of ‘love’ was fights, angry words, and insults. My parents didn’t love each other, and they didn’t love me or my sister. And I’m so scared I’ll be the same as them. I know you’d never… but I’m scared I’d hurt you. And in my attempt of trying to save you from being hurt, I ended up hurting you anyways.” A tear slid down your cheek. “I do love you, Peter. And that scares me. And I ran. I wish I could go back and stop myself from running, but I can’t.

“What I can do is apologize.” Your eyes met Peter’s warm brown ones. “I am so, so sorry, Peter. I wish I could take it all back and we could go back to how we were before. All I can do now is apologize and do my best to make it up to you. I understand if you can’t forgive me or if you don’t want to be friends anymore, but-“ The sound of a chair scraping against the floor startled you, as did the familiar feeling of Peter’s arms around you. You couldn’t stop the flow of tears that started and Peter turned your chair to face him, pulled you up and hugged you tight.

“I’ve got you, I’ve got you,” Peter soothed and you clung to him as if he would disappear if you let go. Minutes passed before either of you spoke again, the only sound in the room being the sound of your sniffles and Peter humming as he held you.

“I missed you,” you whispered and Peter’s grip on you tightened.

“I missed you, too.” You shifted to look up at Peter, whose own eyes were watering. “It’ll take time for things to go back the way they were. But I’m still in love with you, and I don’t want you out of my life. We’ll work through it. Together.”

And, yeah. Together sounds pretty nice.

A month later, the Avengers Compound was full of laughter. Happy and May Parker were seated at the dinner table, Pepper Potts and Tony Stark seated across from them. Ned and MJ sat at one half of the table, and Peter and Y/N sat beside each other, hands interlocked. Peter laughed at something MJ said, and Ned gestured wildly with his hands as he told a story, Y/N butting in with their own comments, and Peter’s eyes shifted to Y/N, a fond smile on his lips. Y/N caught his gaze, and everyone in the room could practically see the heart eyes the two had for each other. Things were great, as they should be. Peter hoped there could be many more days like that, and Y/N had every intention of making that happen.

#mcu x reader #avengers x reader #mcu #peter parker fanfic #peter parker x y/n #peter parker x you #tony stark #gender neutral reader #peter parker is precious #peter parker needs a hug #irondad #aunt may #spiderman x reader #flynnsfics

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bjornswoman · 2 years

Text

Right person wrong time

Requested by @rochyu.

Author's note: Hey people! I am back. I know it's been long and I am sorry for that but I had to manage some serious things that kept me away for some time. Sorry for making you waiting too long. I hope you will like it. I hope it's like you wanted this to be, because it's a request inspired by this scene of Game Of Thrones. Well, till the next time have fun and take care.

Pairing: Ivar x Reader.

Genre: Drama, sad, romance, angst.

Summary: You had an affair with Ivar.

Warnings: Mentions of cheating, beating, miscarriage.

Men don't deserve anything.

You were late to understand that to survive in a world full of hungry for power men is not easy. It had never been easy for a woman in power. But that wasn't the only reason men didn't deserve you. You loved and you got betrayed. You payed for it with the worst way possible and the man that you didn't believe that would be like all the others was just the same and maybe worse.

Anyways, those traumas made you who you ended up being. A queen. Somehow you managed to survive from vicious men.

By telling vicious men nobody could leave behind Ivar the Boneless. He was the man you thought different from the others. Not because of the deformity of his legs. Nothing like that. But from his character. They called him cruel and other words related to monster, but he wasn't only that. At least that was what you believed at first.

But you did your mistakes. Ivar wasn't the only one to put the blame on. Sometimes you even caught yourself thinking how it would be like if you ended up together somehow. How it would be like if he didn't sail to England and didn't die. You had to admit he had a thing for that place he hated it with every bit of his cold heart. His heart wasn't that cold eventually.

Back there, you were just the woman of a new crowned king. A man you hated with every bit of your heart. You felt some of the hate Ivar did for England. Arvid wasn't the right man for you and you knew that from the beginning when your father, another king, married you off to him. Arvid was cruel and you got to know it with the worst way.

Well, you hated the man and then—after a couple of months of your wedding—Ivar came in the picture. The young king of Kattegat plotting an alliance with your husband. That was how you met each other. At first, his curious blue eyes were stuck on you. Then he was talking with you. You grew to like him and he did the same. You even made plans in your mind about a future with him. A future that was impossible to have.

All this fall away after your first and only night together. He had confessed during that night that due to that deformity he couldn't have children, but as the story proved some time after that night, he could. He had impregnated you. You wanted to tell him, but he wasn't around anymore, he was back in Kattegat, and at the same time you were trying to hide it from your husband.

Apparently, you were awful at hiding.

You walked inside the Great Hall of your house after your husband's demands. Ivar was already there. When your eyes met, you could see the confusion in his curious blue eyes.

You were about to take your place next to your husband. You were going to sit on your seat next to his throne. But as you walked closer to him, his hand stopped you. Arvid held his hand in front of you and stopped you. You obeyed and stopped there, looking at him. You couldn't imagine back then that he had managed to find out about your secret thing with king Ivar.

Ivar and his men were behind you, seated at the tables of the Great Hall. You didn't dare to look back at him, but you could feel his gaze burning your back. He could sense that something was wrong too.

Arvid stood up from his throne, grabbing his axe from the floor next to him his men gathered around you two. You looked at them and then at him. You felt afraid. You weren't going to let anyone see, as you were still the queen, king Arvid's wife.

Ivar was looking at you, his brows collided as he was watching what was happening around there. He was angry, it was obvious, but he was cleverer than to cause a scene. But what it came to you, he didn't know what was happening to him. Ivar saw red. Well, even worse he saw black. In the thought that you were in trouble made him sick, made want to kill everyone inside this room, but that wasn't a wise thing to do.

Arvid raised his sword and pointed it to you. You felt like you wanted to look at the floor, to look like you were guilty about something, but you didn't do it. You kept your face straight on him, watching each move he did. He walked closer to you still pointing that axe to you.

"Do you know the reason you are in this position, (Y/N)?" Arvid asked you as he placed the blade of his axe on your chin and lifted your face a bit. Before you could even speak, say that you didn't know, he did it for you. "You are here to answer about your latest treason." He spoke again looking at you. After that you were sure that he knew what you did and with who.

"My king, please let me—" You were about to beg about something anything, you just wanted to save this child and Ivar. Even if he seemed like he didn't even care about your condition, you wouldn't want him to get hurt.

You were no shieldmaiden, no woman who could fight. You couldn't even lift a sword, but for this child you were able to do everything.

As you spoke, your eyes got wet. You couldn't keep your tears. You were weak. You were weak in the eyes of Gods' and you hated that but you couldn't keep it anymore. You didn't care that you were humiliated, not when your child was still fine.

"You betrayed me with the worst way, woman. You cheated on me with another man. You humiliated me. Killing you would sent a message to whoever thinks that he can betray me and get away with it, but that would cause me more problems with your father. So I have to punish you with another way." When he finished talking, he threw the axe on the floor next to me and walked but to his throne. Arvid sat on the seat and looked at you. Your cheeks were wet with new tears that you were trying to keep in so hard. A smirk formed on his face as he was watching you. "Bo." He spoke to one of his warriors and he moved closer to you. Your eyes didn't move from your husband's figure as you were waiting for his next commands. "And leave her face. I like her pretty." That was his last command before Bo punch you

First he punched your belly and your screamed. Your hand met your still tiny belly and cried. You wanted to fight back. You needed to fight back for your baby. You had fallen after his punch. When you stood, you saw him coming again.

"Not on the belly please. Please!" You cried but he didn't listen. He punched you there again and you fell. You tried to stand up again, but you felt terrible pain in your belly. "My baby..." You cried silently as you saw the blood on your dress. You closed your eyes before you try to stand up again. You were humiliated. You had lost your baby. You had nothing left.

When you opened your eyes, they moved on Ivar. He was stood now. All angry. But his men were holding him back in place. It wouldn't be beneficial for him to start a war with Arvid.

That was the moment you understood that Ivar didn't matter. He wasn't worth all this humiliation at the end of the day and that was one of the worst parts of your punishment. The first one was the loss of your baby.

"Oh, yeah. I forgot to say that my dear wife was with another's child." Arvid said as he stood up from his throne, just to make this scene more intense. "Don't you think my lady is a little bit overdressed? Unburden her." He spoke and Bo kicked you and you fell.

His axe cut off your furs and then your dress. You were crying the whole time, but it was all silently. You were grieving only for your child. You didn't care a bit for your humiliation and your lost pride. Before the dress fall from you, Ivar was the one to step up. But it was too late for him to help you. After the loss of your child you didn't care anymore.

"Enough!" Ivar yelled and jumped in front of everyone before they could stopped him. He grabbed his cloak and threw it over your shoulders, as his bodyguards helped you stand, without being exposed.

"This is getting interesting." You heard Arvid say, as the fight was about to begin, because that was what was going to happen after this. Two of Ivars personal guards walked you away from there. You were crying the whole time and declined the help they offered you.

That was the moment you realized you were all alone. That women in this world, in the viking world were either powerful or powerless. They were treated either like a piece of meat or they were famous shieldmaidens or queens. And you were tired of being the first. You were tired of men treated you like you were their property.

After some time that you were rubbing your hurting belly and crying silently, Ivar found you. He had some bruises on his face and blood all over him. He dismissed his guards and came close to you. His hand found your belly. You could see the tears forming in his eyes. You could never think that Ivar the Boneless could cry over something.

"I wish I knew about this child." He spoke as he was caressing your belly. "I would share with it all the old Norse stories I know." He continued and stopped touching your body. Ivar looked at you, but you avoided to. "You should have told me." He whispered and that was the moment you snapped.

"What?! Are you blaming me? If you had stepped in before he had the chance to hit me, this child would have been well! I would have been well! If you hadn't left me at the first place, nothing would have happened!" You snapped as you walked away from him all mad. You knew that you shouldn't blame it on him. It was all you fault. You shouldn't have trusted any man. You shouldn't have let this happen. You were married. You didn't choose Arvid, but you were his wife.

Ivar snapped too. This was too much for him as well. He wanted a child all his life and he thought that he incapable of having one and after it happened he lost it that way. And apart from that he was losing as well. The only woman he had grown feelings for.

"How dare you blame this on me? You were the one who didn't tell me about my child! You were the one was married with another at the first place!" He yelled at you. You started crying again after that, but not out of fear, out of anger. You were so angry and so sad at the same time that you couldn't control your feelings. Apart from everything you felt angry with you for being so weak, for not being able to control you and never start this thing with Ivar. "I killed him." Was the only thing he said before he walked away from you.

And that was the last time you saw him.

The truth to he spoken, you thought countless of times how it would be like if you stopped him. If you didn't let him go. If you left with him. So many ifs that you thought about.

After that memory, you became strong. You trained a lot and became fearless. But you still loved him. After all this time that blue-eyed man was stuck inside your head. When you heard about his achievements you felt happy. Lowkey, you always hoped about an encounter. A chance with him, as you preferred to call it.

Ivar was what people call right person, wrong time.

Maybe you were wrong. Men didn't deserve, but there are exceptions in everything. So on second thought Ivar was one of them. And that was the reason he left that day. He knew the part of the story that he was wrong and you knew yours.

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