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sleepyangelkami · 10 months

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Okay but imagine - Tommy and Maria have a daughter (reader obvs) and is shy and quiet while ellie is all outgoing n stuff eeeek they would make such a good couple

CRYBABY e.williams

☆ WORD COUNT - 7.6K

ELLIE WILLIAMS X FEM!READER

☆ SUMMARY - reader is tommy and maria's daughter and while she had always been on the shyer side, she can't help but fall into a loop upon becoming best friends with the ellie williams. and how on earth is she going to come to terms with the sudden feelings bubbling insider her when she finds ellie has begun to pay more attention to her 'fling' cat.

☆ warnings - mushy fluff, angry love confession, kissing, loser lesbians?, stupid grumpy x sunshine trope (my absolute fave), reader is kinda innocent, slight suggestive themes, angst if you squint, mentions of cat, reader is mentioned to be shorter than ellie, tinsy bit of tommy and maria slander? mentions of bullying, intended lower case, nothing i write is ever proof read 🩷

the princess of jackson. ellie williams could remember the day when she very first met her, the prized possession, the adored and loved. you.

of course, you were both only fourteen then. ellie williams stood with a small scowl on her face, standing parted from joel as he had a heated conversation with tommy, your father. she hadn't even noticed you, too caught up in her own feelings. she needed to get to the fireflies and quickly, she had no time to 'dilly dally' while waiting for tommy miller, she had decided he was nothing but a cowered, unwilling to help.

she only met the man, so naturally such an opinion hadn't stuck with her. but then, oh how she hated his stupid face. rolling her eyes over something stupid he had said, she turned her eyes to his wife, who was standing off near her, though completely engrossed in the conversation between the two older men. And then, her eyes landed on a pretty girl, standing in a woollen jumper that hung from her frame, covering her hands whole. you.

it was that moment, ellie realised, that she had fallen completely head over heels for y/n miller. she didn't know you then, you were just a child and a shy one at that. you stood practically clinging to your mother, hands fiddling with one another as you listened to your father raise his voice, nothing new, it was apparent that tommy miller had anger issues at times.

she merely stared, too embarrassed to so much as part her lips fully, simply turning her nose up. it wasn't until you turned your head that you noticed her impending stare. instantly, your face heated up like a match lit on fire. eyes widening slightly, you whipped your head back around, ignoring the way your hair now covered your face from her view but she could still... sense it, the way your face had turned beat red. if it were anyone else, she would have chuckled, threw her head back and laughed at whoever was embarrassed to make mere eye contact amiss an apocalypse. but she didn't laugh, didn't even smile. instead, her face softened into an expression you were still yet to decipher.

it didn't take long for you and ellie to meet again.

you didn't talk to her before she left, didn't even bid her a hello or a goodbye. she simply stared as you all but cowered behind your mother. your mother introduced you, however, knowing you weren't going to do it yourself. "this is y/n, y/n this is ellie." and you simply nodded as ellie wore a small smile, growing more impatient to leave the town as the seconds scraped by.

and you thought you had gotten away, weaved your way out of making a new friend, you always did hate it when maria pushed you. you were adored in jackson by all the elders, all the adults and yet if there was one thing you couldn't do, it was talk to people your age. let alone a pretty girl like ellie williams.

but when the girl reappeared soon after, your parents were just over the moon about a girl your age living so close, having such a close connection with your family as your uncle practically took her in. you could remember the first day you were told to talk to the girl, you remembered hating every single second of it.

you had to walk all the way from the main hall to her house, and for some reason the fourteen year old girl was given her own house, you weren't sure of, maybe a bad call by your father. nonetheless, you didn't think much of it, too focused on the angry mumbles tumbling from your lips as you puffed your cheeks out, reddened with the cold. you had to return a jacket, a jacket for god sake. you hadn't felt like it when tommy pulled you aside, shoving a green jacket in your hands and telling you to return it to the girl, stating she'd need it in the morning. you simply cringed, stating that your uncle could return it when he was passing home but of course, your parents would never give up a chance for you to communicate with teenagers your age, and so, they shoved you out the main hall door.

you cursed every star and constellation that she had managed to leave it behind. looking back, you weren't even sure why she had been in the hall in the first place. she did so many jobs for the town it was difficult for you to keep track. you almost grew envious of how everyone had come to adore the girl. it wasn't as if they had adored you any less, you simply envied the way she could keep the conversation flowing with the people of jackson, how she stood up tall and didn't have to glance down at her fingers every five seconds, attempting to come up with some form of a response. unlike you, that is.

puffing out another breath, you ignored the white smoke in front of you, painting an image that you had been smoking. it was almost humorous, the thought, y/n miller would have gone near no such thing. you brought a balled fist up, knocking on the door gently. almost instantly, you retracted it back to your side, chomping down on your bottom lip. you didn't know why you were so embarrassed but you could feel your face getting hot already and for the love of god it was the middle of winter in jackson.

you mentally cringed when no one answered the door, knowing you'd have to knock again. what if she had heard it and chose to neglect it? what if you came off much too annoying? what if she opened the door in the middle of knocking? what if she was in the bathroom? your thoughts were cut short by your own actions, knocking on the door once more only this time, not as softly. and when you received no answer this time, the door slowly creaked open.

eyes widening, you turned to look around as if casper the ghost would appear at any given moment. you slowly pushed the door open further, who leaves their front door unlocked in the middle of the night? you made a mental note to remind ellie to lock her doors, you know, if you ever actually gained the confidence to speak to her. swallowing harshly, you peeked your head in from the front door. "ellie?" your voice slightly raspy. "uhm, ellie!" attempting to project your voice just a little louder this time, of course failing in your attempts.

then your eyes caught it. her.

she was sitting at her desk, pen in hand and bushed brown ponytail sitting on her back. you took note of the earphones plugged into her ears. of course she hadn't heard you, you could practically hear her music blaring from where you stood all the way at her door. you had been near ellie at least a thousand times by now, she was always creeping close, her eyes always strained towards your face. you always pretended not to notice the way her eyes would stay fixated on you, the way you completely ignored her presence every single time. not on purpose, obviously, but you knew the minute you were pushed into her bubble, you'd find some way to absolutely humiliate yourself, you swore yourself against that, embarrassing yourself in front of ellie williams. and yet here you stood, awkwardly holding her jacket in your hands as you slowly entered the room. her house wasn't massive but it was very homely. shutting the door with your back facing it, you called out her name again in hopes of her somehow hearing you despite the loud music plugged into her ears.

you bit down on your bottom lip, moving closer to her. you reached your hand out, wincing knowing you were going to scare the girl however you truly did have no other choice. you softly patted her shoulder causing her to completely whip around.

you flinched as her book went tumbling to the ground, a yelp falling from her own lips as you took a step back, eyes screwed shut momentarily.

"y/n, jesus christ!" pressing a hand to her chest as she ripped the earphones out from her ears, heart thumping quickly.

despite no one scaring you, your own heart was thumping swiftly against your chest. "sorry, sorry!" instantly feeling guilt washing over you.

"you're okay." the girl chuckled, pushing the ear buds onto the table. "just scared me is all." puffing out a breath to show she was merely breathless from the scare.

"sorry, i didn't mean to." instantly falling to your knees to pick up the book that had fallen off the table. "your door was open and you had earphones on — i called your name but you didn't hear me- did you draw these?" suddenly, your breath caught in your throat, rambling being cut off as you peered down at the sketchbook in your hands, filled with mystical drawings. there was a dragon splayed across two pages along with gargoyles hiding at the corner of the pages, many other creatures you didn't even know the name to on the pages.

"uh- yeah." sitting back in her seat. her eyes were glued to yours, watching your face as your own eyes scanned across the page, face shifted into complete awe at her amazing art work. you stayed silent, eyes blown wide in complete shock. how could someone so young be so... talented?

raking your eyes over the drawing of the dragon once more, you tried to ignore how well the creature had been captured onto the single page, head tilting as you viewed such shading you thought only artists could do. "they're... amazing." breathing out as you looked back up, handing her the book as you suddenly realised you had been overstepping.

"thanks." she chuckled, taking the book out of your hands. with your eyes glued to the ground, you let her take it from your soft grasp. but when her fingers brushed against yours, you tried all that you could to not look up at her with pink flushed cheeks, simply ignoring it as it seemed she had. she placed the book back down on the table, turning in her chair to view you once more. "uhm... did you need something..?" she hadn't said it in a rude way but it was enough to send you back to reality.

"oh!" looking down at the green jacket in your hands. "uhm, maria and tommy said to give you this, you left it in the main hall." it was simply easier to call your parents by their first name in front of ellie, you didn't wish to embarrass yourself by calling them mama or daddy in front of her, it was beyond shameful so you simply stuck to their names, shooting your hand out to hand her the jacket.

"oh, thank you." grasping the jacket but this time her fingers never grazed yours. "probably gonna need this in the morning. last thing i need is to be going on patrol with no jacket." laughing softly at the very unfunny comment before tossing the jacket to the side.

your head perked up. "you're on patrol?" confused brows furrowing together.

"yeah." she squirmed in her seat. "why, something wrong with that?"

"no, no." you quickly defended, shaking your head. "it's just... you're a little young for that, no?"

she shrugged her shoulders. "nothin' i haven't seen before." you nodded your head at that, a little unsure but nonetheless, you were not one to interject. if she said she knew what she was doing, she probably did, after all she had spent more time on the road than anyone else in jackson. "hey, uh, the storm has gotten pretty bad out there." you turned your head in confusion, eyes peering out the window. she wasn't lying. snow now tumbled down outside at a much quicker pace than the small flakes that had fallen on you on your way there. "why don't you stay here for the night, probably too dangerous to walk back now anyway."

you turned your head back slowly, mind registering the words ellie had just spoken. you had never had a sleepover before, and you were sure that this wasn't a sleepover at all, but your mind couldn't help but jump in ecstasy. "uhm..." your parents wouldn't even notice, if anything, they'd be over the moon at the thought of their daughter spending time with someone her age. "are you sure you don't mind?" shuffling your feet against the wooden floor, hopping from foot to foot.

she almost laughed at you, blinking at you. " 'course not." as if you were being absurd. she stood from the seat, pushing herself towards her drawers. "you can wear some of my clothes for the night but they uh, might be a little big." she eyed you, noticing that you were shorter than her, not by a great amount but enough to make her clothes baggy on you.

"i don't mind." you smiled gently at the girl who was already grinning at you. "thank you, ellie." you weren't used to people your age being nice to you. usually, they were beyond rude which was more or less why you had put yourself in a shell. you knew you'd get nowhere in making friends so what was the point? your parents obviously thought very differently. so it was safe to say that ellie williams, a rather scary teenager, being quite kind to you was a rather foreign feeling, something inside you screaming at you, stating that she was playing some kind of a joke on you, it was a game, all a game. but the way her eyes softened when she looked at you had your knees weak and the wall you had built up slowly chipping.

she shrugged, tossing a long white shirt your way. "that's what friends are for."

you caught the t shirt. friends? the ellie williams wanted to be your friend?

that was the first sleepover of many. ellie williams was an exact opposite of you, that was the exact reason why you were the perfect match. everyone in jackson adored you as if you were their own daughter but despite that, you were rather reserved. you didn't have many friends your age, dina and jesse maybe, but you weren't close with them, not like you were with ellie. she was outgoing, bubbly, everyone adored her just as much, the only difference was that she was much more popular with the people your age. she had gone through so many girls it baffled you and now she was on the next, cat was her name, and ellie seemed infatuated by her.

but despite her going through her fair share of girls she always told you one thing, as corny as it was that you were 'her main girl' always and forever, you couldn't deny that the words had your cheeks heating up an embarrassing amount.

you were never good with people your age, not good at keeping conversations or starting them. you always had a problem with opening your mouth around them but with ellie, it was the exact opposite. she was so easy to talk to, a complete breath of fresh air in a world you never imagined yourself being happy in.

you did everything together, went everywhere together, you were practically attached to her hip by the time you were both nineteen. like now, as you stood with your hands on her shoulders in attempts to keep your balance. she was leaned down on one knee, the other propped up with your left foot placed on it, tying your shoelaces with ease. "should we check the east estate?" you questioned, fumbling with the fabric of your gloves. this wasn't a new thing, it seemed as though you always tracked around with your shoe laces untied, ellie constantly commented on it, stating that you'd someday fall and break your head open. you always rolled your eyes and called her dramatic until you actually fell over and then she'd bend down and tie them for you, despite your angry protests. today wasn't like no other, the white snow dusting across the knees of your jeans served as proof.

"jesse and dina did yesterday." she shrugged. you had been designated patrol partners upon the day of your very first patrol, you begged your parents to assign you together. they tried to get you out there, talking to other people and making new friends but after too many nights of you returning with tear stained cheeks, they decided that ellie was enough. her face suddenly contorted. "yeah we should probably check." patting the back of your calf to let you know you could bring your foot back down.

the boot on your foot crunched against the snow while you looked up at the girl as she stood, taller than you, she had grown a great deal since she was fourteen. "thought you said jesse and dina checked yesterday." following her in the snow, she knew the tracks much better than you did.

she gave you the smallest of smirks that you couldn't understand. you were so innocent, she thought, then again it was hard to be educated in a world alike their own. "they weren't doing anything except for getting in eachother's pants, sweetheart." that pretty nickname that always had your cheeks set aflame.

a mix between the pet name and the words that had fallen from her mouth as if it were nothing had your whole face a beat red. "oh." fell from your lips while the girl chuckled at you, fixing the straps of her backpack. you were thankful to be standing behind her now for you were sure that if she had been at eye level with you, she would have seen your flustered face and that was simply something you didn't need her seeing.

the east estate came into the clearing quicker than you thought, you had also finished much earlier than intended so there was nothing to do other than raid the nearby houses. "so..." you trailed off, attempting to make conversation from behind ellie, her gun in her hands as she peeked around a corner, nervous as your nonchalant figure stood behind her, gun hidden somewhere in your bag. you really were too clumsy for this job. "how are you and cat." the name rolling off in a way you didn't like, it made you almost disgusted in yourself.

"fine." she opened the last bathroom door, shoulders relaxing as she began rooting through the shelves. you made yourself busy in the bedroom that was attached to it, you couldn't imagine living in a house so big. "I told you we're not serious."

"wouldn't matter if you were." you mumbled so lowly that the girl didn't even hear it, she had just assumed that you dropped the subject altogether. the silence was swiftly cut off when you opened a box, finding a chess box inside. "oh my god!"

ellie came out from the bathroom swiftly, her gun clutched tightly between her fingers. you hadn't even noticed her demeanour slouching as she realised you were excited, not scared. "hey, weren't you lookin' for one of those?" nodding at the box of chess inside your hands.

"yeah, it's so cool!" it was a glass set, the one that you had in fact, been searching for. you adored chess, it was a way to ease the mind but you had never come across a glass set, as badly as you had wanted it. "wonder if the people who used to live here liked chess." you placed it down on the bed and moved around to the other side of the room, pulling open one of the drawers.

"what are you doin'?" leaning against the doorframe of the bathroom, you turned to her baffled, confused as to what you were doing wrong. "I mean, why aren't you packin' it?"

you shrugged your shoulders, glancing back at the set. "no room in my bag." and you were travelling on feet today meaning you didn't have your horse to carry an extra bag. your own bag had been filled to the brim with both food and some medical supplies along with your gun lost somewhere, you didn't have room for a stupid chess board. besides, you were sure that if your mother saw you bring it in through the gates she would wear a disapproving face and tell you that you shouldn't be looking out for things like that, you were out there to get stuff for the town, there was no need to be so selfish.

ellies brows were furrowed. "but you wanted it." as unfair as the situation was, you simply rolled your shoulders with a small laugh.

"doesn't matter." you stated, closing the drawers. "it's not that important anyway." ellie loved tommy and maria, truly, but she couldn't deny that they were more leader than they were parents at times. they often belittled you, stated that your interests didn't matter, that you were truly just a spec in the massive town but ellie knew they had to realise you were much more than a member of jackson, you were their daughter. "should we go back now?"

ellie took a glance out the window, it was beginning to get dark. "one more house, then we can go back." to which you nodded her head and exited the bedroom. the bedroom in the next home was an exact replica except for the different sheets and the wallpaper, along with the fact that the vanity was from a different store. this made you realise that the houses were probably already furnished before they were sold. "oh, look." ellie spoke as you looked up from the magazines you were flicking through. "cat loves cats, ironic." she laughed and stare down at the necklace in her hands, a black cat pendant on the silver chain.

you moved closer towards it, it truly was pretty. it reminded you of how ellie had given you a necklace once of a pink gem heart, you still wore it around your neck every day. you ignored the rising bile in your stomach and swallowed harshly, unsure if why you suddenly felt a little hot. "why don't you bring it back to her?" looking at it over ellie's shoulder. the sudden thought of ellie standing behind cat, clasping the back of the necklace together with a smile on her face caused your head to spin, and not in a way that you liked. you couldn't understand why you were feeling like this, perhaps it was because ellie williams was your best friend and the thought of her leaving, picking someone over you, was truly bone crushing. or perhaps it was because you never really had a best friend before and you didn't wish to loose the one you had made.

"nah." plopping it back down on the table. you furrowed your brows at her, if she knew that she would like it, why not gift it to her? when ellie turned, she noticed the confused look on your face. "I told you, it's not like that." and suddenly you were hyper aware of the necklace around your neck that she had gifted you, surely you weren't like that either. then again, it didn't really count because it was for your birthday and as your best friend, she probably just felt the need to buy something for you. maybe it was pity, maybe it was guilt, you just had to accept the fact that ellie williams in no way felt that way for you. then again you didn't either, right? so what was the big deal. perhaps you were just jealous that you thought your best friend had picked a new friend, you decided to ignore it, swallowing down the annoyed feeling. "you okay?"

you swallowed, pushing your feet around. "are we ready to go back?" dodging the question completely, it was easier to do this than lie, you didn't like to lie, especially to ellie. lying that you were okay was one thing but you knew ellie, she wouldn't leave it there, she'd make you promise and you don't break promises.

ellie knew better than to start something here, now, so she simply nodded her head, pursing her lips as she picked her bag up off the ground. "yeah, lets go." you nodded your own head, making sure to fix the straps of your bag before leaving the house you were in, ready to walk back to jackson with snow crunching beneath your feet.

the walk home was quiet, not an uncomfortable silence but instead one that hazily loomed over you both, one that you were well used to by now. "so..." kicking the snow underneath her feet, ellie cleared her throat. "your mom talk to you about that party tonight?" it was a gathering in the main hall, one with alcohol so naturally ellie's brain wired itself into believing it was a party, she had convinced herself and everyone around her.

you knew better than to contradict what she was saying and instead nodded your head. "mhm." humming. "you going?" you turned to face her, nose upturned. you were always forced into these events, whether you wished to be there or not. usually, the reasoning behind this was to 'get you out there' was what your parents told you, anyway, stating that you 'needed people in your life other than ellie' you begged to differ, ellie williams was enough for you.

"probably." kicking the snow underneath her feet, you could hear something in her bag rattling, you shrugged it off for cans hitting against one another or something hollow holding small continents that didn't take up enough space. "can't leave you all alone now, can I?" and despite the fact she spoke with a grin, you nodded your head, knowing that the only reason she was actually going was, in fact, to make sure that you weren't alone. "why're you so silent today?" though you had only begun your silent spell the minute the name 'cat' was uttered from the girls lips.

you shrugged your shoulders. "jus' tired." but you couldn't wear the image from your head. cat turned around as ellie tied the necklace to her neck from behind. cat wasn't a girly girl, though, unlike you, no, she never wore skirts, had little to no jewelry and was rather tough, you supposed that had nothing to do with being girly but everything to do with your insecurities. you were shy, small in tough situations, ellie was sort of a protector, you supposed you were insecure in knowing that ellie didn't have that weight on her shoulders when she was with cat, she didn't have to worry about 'taking care of her' not in the way she did with you, you couldn't deny the guilt that begun to sprout.

"y/n." ellie chuckled, slightly tugging on the bottom stand of your hair to get your attention, you pushed your head away, gazing up at her, you hadn't noticed the way your eyes ever so slightly had begun to gloss over. god, you thought, this was beyond embarrassing. or at least, it should have been. your face should have been red raw and you shouldn't have been able to form a coherent sentence, but it was ellie you were talking to, she knew you inside out, better than you knew yourself, there truly was nothing to be embarrassed about. "get out of your head." and she knew your overthinking like the back of her hand, she knew that once set off, you fell down a not too sweet rabit hole and despite the fact she had absolutely no idea what you were thinking about, she could tell that expression from anywhere, in desperate need of an escape, she provided you with one.

"sorry." you spoke lowly, eyes gazing down at the wet patches on the knee of your jeans, from when you had fallen in the snow beforehand.

"nothin' to be sorry for, angel." head turned upwards as the gates of jackson came into her view. "i'm gonna tell joel to come too, you think your mom and dad need anything?"

you assumed joel would be coming anyway, seeing as tommy was his brother, but you hadn't known for sure, joel wasn't exactly the most reliable man you'd ever met, despite the fact he was your uncle. "doubt it but you should tell him to ask daddy anyway."

you both entered the gates of jackson, smiling to jesse as he took your bag off your back without a word. "will do." ellie turned, a smile slowly curving up on her lips, but before you could bask in her angelic features, she was stumbling backwards, hands pushing out to hold herself and... cat up. cat had thrown her arms around her as if she were a long distant girlfriend, meeting her in an airport, ellie's own hands came down to her waist to stablize her, you suddenly felt the bile rise to your throat, you were going to be sick.

as your breathing turned shallow, your mouth dry and cold, you ignored the way your eyes suddenly stung and simply turned around, you couldn't face it, the sight of them had become too much. you could vaguely remember hearing your name being called from behind you, though you couldn't remember if it were jesse, ellie or even cat who had called it, one task at hand, getting home.

luckily for you, your house wasn't mere minutes from the gates so you arrived home rather briskly. the only downside to this, your eyes had become red rimmed and it had not yet wore off, your mother also stood inside the kitchen with a woman named donna, a lovely woman who was helping out with tonight's gathering. "hey sweet-" she cut herself off, noticing the small tears in your eyes. "what happened?"

you turned, embarrassment filling your face. "I- uhm, cut my knee really bad, gonna go up to the bathroom and clean it." you were a bad liar, a terrible one even but what else was there to say? you couldn't even decipher why you were sad yourself. you couldn't possibly be... jealous? could you? no. not a chance.

"show me a look." she almost demanded, voice still as soft as honey.

"no- no, it's okay." already halfway up the stairs as your concerned mother stood next to a confused donna. "it doesn't even hurt that bad, i'll be down soon." and without waiting for another word, you had pushed yourself right up the stairs and into the bathroom, locking the door.

for as long as you could remember, your bathroom had been a solitude for you, a safe haven. sure, your bedroom had a lock but it wasn't used unless emergencies so you knew better than to use it every time you were upset, which proved to be often as you grew up and realised just how utterly sensitive you were. you sat on the bathroom floor, breathing irregular but you squeezed your eyes shut, pushing your head onto your knees and wondered, what was all of this even from? surely, you weren't that upset just because you thought you weren't ellie's favourite anymore.

whatever the case, all you knew was that the tears didn't stop until later that night when you sat in front of your vanity, applying little blotches of make up.

you weren't typically a make up girl but you knew you had to do something to get rid of these stupid tear stains on your cheeks. finally, you had fixed your face enough to know that no one, not even ellie williams herself, would be able to spot how hard you cried that morning. then, you slipped on your dress that your mother had picked out for you.

(the dress bc i want you guys to be able to see the idea i had with this)

and in less than a half hour, you stood inside the main hall, a bowl of treats in your hands as you went around to the younger ones, passing them out, also passing them out to the adults who stared a little too long, making their longing and shame both very apparent. you didn't mind however, smiling sweetly before offering them one to which they greedily dug in.

you spoke to a lot of people that night, stopped to conversate with some that you wouldn't have if you were under different circumstances. you could feel eyes piercing into you, the ones belonging to giddy teenagers who, for some reason, found enjoyment in what you could only guess was talking about you. you didn't much care for the teenagers of jackson, sure, you adored ellie williams with your whole heart and you found comfort in dina and jesse, an on and off couple from the minute you met them but other than that, you didn't really have friends. they made you feel different, a kind of different that made you question if there were something wrong with you, there had to be, if so many people truly could not get along with you. you talked to the elderlies, to the adults, even to the kids, but the teenagers... the teenagers you steered clear of.

you spoke to dina and jesse earlier that night, however, they had run off the minute the alcohol that they shouldn't have been drinking hit their system and suddenly they had disappeared into thin air. your eyes searched the room as you bit on your thumb, well aware of the teenage laughter behind you, aimed directly at you.

where was ellie? it was approaching eleven o clock, some people had headed home, the couples too lazy to wait any longer, the parents who's kids needed their rest, some of the elderlies who needed sleep just as much as the kids. ellie said she'd be here, the thought of her missing it because she and cat had some sort of run in made your stomach sick and yet it was the only thing you could think of, it had to be the only excuse. i mean, cat was no where to be spotted either.

you sat at one of the tables, chin resting in the palm of your hand, your shoes had begun to get uncomfortable and your hair seemed too tight, you were sure a little mascara had smudged beneath your eyes too, despite the many times you rubbed it away with your finger. ellie wasn't one to not stick to what she told you, she wasn't one to stand you up either. but you knew how it was, cat was hers and she was cats despite the many times she told you they weren't, you knew that, so why were you disappointed to think she chose her over you?

the thought of ellie hugging her tight, kissing her lips, even down her neck, you could feel your stomach turning. you wanted nothing more than to get the image out of your head. to your luck, or maybe not, you were brought back to life with a tap on your shoulder. "y/n, hey!" that was a voice you recognised all too well, your stomach turned even more than it already had. was there anything that was going good for you that night?

you turned around, standing up as if you were nervous to be in the girls presence, she giggled at this. "hi, kady." kady was a pretty girl, one that was beyond popular, for reasons you were still unsure about. sure, she was pretty, she had a large circle of friends but to this day you couldn't decipher why people liked her. she was a cruel teenage girl, one who invalidated others to make her own head bigger than it already was, truly, it was a surprise to you that she could even fit in the door.

upon the years that you grew up in jackson, kady had always treated you as though you were someone below her. and maybe you were, you had grown used to the way she acted around you, her unacceptable behaviour towards you had grown seemingly acceptable, simply because you wouldn't stand up for yourself. "having fun by yourself?" she had a grin on her face, one that would have looked polite and sweet but truly was nothing other than conceited. "oh gosh, i don't mean it like that." quick to correct herself noticing the way your face had fallen. "I just mean... you know, i thought ellie would spare some time away from cat for the evening but i guess not."

you simply shrugged your shoulders, not wishing to buy into this any longer. "she's probably just busy." mumbling. you always felt yourself become smaller around kady, as if you were truly a child once more and she was picking on you once more, causing you to go running home to your mother with dewey eyes, they brushed it off with you being too sensitive.

"probably with cat, if you know what i mean." wriggling her brows at you suggestively, you simply bit your lip and turned away. "i was kinda surprised when they got together, i always thought you guys would get together."

your head snapped towards her at that statement. "what?" suddenly your breath grew short. "why would you think that?" you had a secret, one no one could know, not even the pages of your diary, one you had begun to accept that very morning, now, however, you wished nothing more than to flush it down the drain.

"come on, y/n, we're not blind." rolling her eyes as she crossed her arms over her black tank top. "you follow her around like a lost puppy, it's pathetic." your gut twisted, her words forming a knot in your stomach. "i mean, it's probably for the best she's with cat, i don't think anyone would be able to stick a relationship with you."

you looked up, ignoring the way your eyes annoyingly began to sting. you hated how sensitive you were, you were a crybaby, an annoying, pathetic crybaby. "kady can you just... leave me alone." your voice broke, as did your heart, shattering right on the floor in that very second.

"god, do you hear yourself?" she was laughing, as if any of this was truly funny. "face it, y/n, you're never going to be anything other than the irritating little girl you were as a kid, you're never going to change, you're never going to get someone like ellie williams to love someone like you." what did that even mean? your mind spun, your head felt queasy, your eyes hazy.

you didn't say anything else, you weren't going to entertain it, you pushed past a laughing kady, practically throwing her head back at the state you were in now.

you pushed past everyone else, ignoring the strange looks you got at the sight of your tear stained cheeks, ignoring the way your throat begun to hurt an abnormal amount. only one thing in your mind.

"you're never going to get someone like ellie williams to love someone like you."

it rung through your mind causing your whole body to shift, you wanted to go home, get to bed and cry. you wanted to cry your heart out and ignore ellie williams for eternity. why? because you knew that you had already fallen deeply in love with her and there wasn't even the slightest possibility she felt some way remotely alike that to you. you blamed yourself, not her, but that didn't mean you could ever face her again.

just as you though the night couldn't possibly get any worse, already drowned in the heavy rain pattering against your skin, fat tears rolling down your cheeks. you walked directly into something, or more specifically, someone. arms instantly reached out, stabilizing you both. you turned your nose up, just about to apologise for your rudeness before you caught sight of who it was. "y/n, what-" you cut the brunette girl off before she could speak anymore.

"where were you?!" your hands pushed her back and ellie stumbled backwards, stunned at your actions with wide eyes and mouth fallen agape. "you told me you'd be there and you weren't! you told me you would!" she couldn't understand why you were so mad and why your face had been covered in mascara and ugly fat tears that clouded your pretty eyes.

"y/n, i'm sorry i didn't think it would be a big deal-" attempting to walk closer to you once more. "I was with cat and-"

"of course you were!" taking your own steps back, ellie's brows furrowed in confusion. "you're always with s-stupid cat!"

ellie couldn't understand where all of this was coming from, she thought you liked cat for you had gushed over how sweet she was a number of times before she and ellie were ever even a thing. "y/n, i'm sorry!" she pushed herself towards you but before you could get away, her hands were falling on your forearms. "i should have been there, i know, i'm sorry, i messed up."

you shook your head, ignoring the way your tears had mixed with the heavy rain pattering against your frail skin. "y-you picked her." your words just above a whisper and due to the heavy rain, ellie had hardly heard you.

"what?" sudden confusion washing over her. ellie was a girl of her word but it wasn't rare for her to not show up to things, she always apologised profusely and did everything in her power to make it up to you, what was rare, however, was this reaction sprouted from you.

you turned your head, sighing heavily and squeezing your eyes shut, you wanted to be at home, in bed. "it doesn't matter." hands moving to wipe your face, ignoring the way ellie's own hands fell from your arms, causing instant warmth to be retracted. "i'm sorry, i'm sorry." suddenly, you felt as though it were all your fault.

ellie was your best friend, albeit, just a friend. she owed you nothing. and you had no place to be this angry with her for being with someone when you were nothing. "what- no, no, why are you sorry?" you shook your head once more, taking a step back. she wasn't having it. she was in front of you again in an instant, her hands coming down to take in your face.

silence washed over you both, the only sound to be heard was the constant patter of rain against the ground beneath you and your breaths that had grown slightly heavier now that you were so close. her warm hands completely contradicted your freezing face, a beautiful contrast as they slowly caressed your pretty skin. "talk to me, angel." her words a soft lull. "don't shut me out."

your mind was racing as ellie williams stood exactly where you wanted her, where you needed her. but would you risk everything you've ever created with her for something she may not even have thought about before? no, you told yourself, you couldn't. but the louder, the stronger, part of yourself screamed at you to. "i can't say it." you opted for, mouth scrunching in distaste as your voice wobbled like a child. an absolute crybaby.

ellie shook her head, auburn locks shaking with it. "yes you can, baby." thumbs moving against your skin. "say the words and i'll make the sentences if i have to just... say something." and the way her own voice cracked, the way her desperate walls began to fall down, suddenly, you wondered if she already knew. she had to have. did she think the same way you did? had she already had this conversation a thousand times in her head like you did? did she imagine this very scenario a million times over just alike you did?

suddenly, your head felt light.

suddenly, your breath slowed.

suddenly, your thoughts fell right out of your mind.

suddenly, her lips looked so sweet.

suddenly, your own her on hers.

you pushed your head upwards, your lips crashing into her own. her hands instantly fell to your waist, holding you. your own hands were brought up, sure the cloth of your sleeves were still stuck to your hands but you didn't care, for you would have much rathered to hold her face no matter the situation. slowly, the tears vanished as your lips moved against her own, you melted into her, in a way that you had never melted before, you were a puddle. ellie took over in an instant, her face pushed against yours, lips moving hasitly as if she was scared you'd disappear.

however, you eventually pulled away for air, your lungs squeezed together as you panted against her lips, one hand holding her cheek, the other at the back of her neck. you looked up at her with your pretty doe eyes, a smile soon formed on her lips as they curved upwards. "just so you know." she panted, too out of breath. "i'd choose you." lips pushing against yours for a gentle peck. "a million times over."

that night was filled with a thousand more kisses and a gift from ellie, surprisingly enough. a certain glass chess set sitting a top her bed as she grinned at you. it was like that. not with cat but with you.

main masterlist/ellie's masterlist

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artthemasquerade · 5 months

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She was their Deity

"Like a deity, Miki is what keeps Akira and Ryo going, it is what makes her love and hate them both for all eternity. Because to them now, she is nothing but a symbol to fight wars over. A saintly love without flaws and a deep regret that’ll never truly be forgiven. Because Miki will never be allowed to be a human being in their eyes again, for in their eyes and through her end, she has become divine."

Okay so I've finally gotten around to watching Devilman Crybaby, and I don't hate it, I actually like it a lot more than I thought I would despite its flaws and oh boy are there some flawwsss (holy shit they did Sirene so fucking dirty in this series!!! Worse part of crybaby for real) and I can't say I was 100% fond of how they depict Ryo (before going into this series I did headcanon that they were portraying Ryo/Satan as someone who had lived in such a warlike mindset for so long he couldn't get out of it even when he thought he was human, and thus couldn't live in peace, Akira was the only thing that gave him peace but he couldn't admit it, if he admits love exists and thus sorrow exists and that'll slow him down from doing what needs to be done. Maybe I'm just coping but whatever it works for me, and if that was what the creators were going for then they needed to make it more clear and have more eps cause the break neck speed this series had really hurt it! But I have to say the last four eps were really good and ep 9 and 10 really brought me to tears like damn the series had good bones it just needed more time!😭Also I needed more Zennon pleasseeeee!

Crybaby really made Miki an almost saintly character and while I do like that she ultimately helped Akira by inspiring every devilman to come out and fight for humanity, I do miss her feisty side and her being just a normal teenage girl being unfairly murdered all because Akira had lived with her family and how society tends to punish women especially teenage girls who are barely involved more harshly than the people directly involved. But whatever those are different takes and honestly both are good but ya know personal preferences and hey since I like to play with time loops in my AUs its one of those possible things (tho I will say that my crybaby verse is much more edited and Sirene has pretty much the same motives and arc as she did in the manga and ova cause woww nope not having what happened crybaby)

But more nice things I will say about the series, I really love the music, it is amazing and also I love the intro so much, I've been listening to it a lot and I try to watch it when I watched the next ep! I love the ink blotty look to it and the symbolism!And that's what lead me to make this picture, cause yes my ot3 exist even in my crybaby verse, but oh boy is it messy!XD Since Miki is pretty saintly in crybaby, I wouldn't be surprised that Akira and Ryo would come to see her as a saint after her death, Akira mourning her loss and Ryo regretting letting her die. So I did some grayscale shading with the watercolor brush in procreate and it was fun to mess around outside my usual style and yes I gave Ryo his sideburns, he needed them back! XD it was fun to play around with my style and maybe I'll do something like this again sometime, maybe not crybaby related tho.

Btw if you like what you see and want a commission drop me a direct message on tumblr, instagram, a note on deviantart or artistree https://artistree.io/missn11

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bug-the-chicken-nug · 1 year

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i know this isn't really The Point they're going for in v9 but man i wish Alyx could just be like.

Genuinely a really sweet, caring, sensitive kind of girl, with the flaws that can come with that instead: Shy, naive, a crybaby, kind of a coward, scared to hurt anyone's feelings, etc.

With the theme of her original story being that it's about learning to stand up for yourself and others, while also staying true to yourself.

Because in the context of her being a black girl (girls typically read as more "naturally" mean and aggressive) and her being in a show about girls who are all supposed to be conventionally strong and brave and good at fighting, this *does* actually loop back to being subversive, and it could be used in some genuinely interesting ways.

Mainly I'm thinking of the girls like originally discussing the story in a way that indicates their culture sees it as a "babyish" story. In the early volume, Yang and Weiss keep taking cheap shots at it all and rolling their eyes at their memories of what a boring little goody-two-shoes Alyx was, and how trite and childish it all seemed even when they were little kids themselves.

Blake tries to defend it, but they don't take her defenses too seriously, while Ruby is too moody to have much input on it either way, but Yang mentions that even Ruby mostly only liked it for the bright colors.

And then a lot more denizens turn out to remember and miss Alyx, in the case of ruder or blunter ones often straight up making commentary about how the girls don't measure up to her.

This offends the group at first, because to be fair some of these comments really are pretty fuckin uncalled for, and plus, they just don't really... Get it.

Despite Alyx hating to fight and having been written as crying and shaking the one time the events of the book forced her to, despite her not even actually *winning* that fight, almost everyone here seems to regard her as more heroic and admirable than our mains.

And Ruby is the first to truly see why: Because for all of her faults, at least Alyx was always *careful* and *considerate*. Alyx always admitted it when she needed help, and didn't try to bite off more than she could chew. Alyx was patient and diplomatic, she *listened* to people, didn't make promises she couldn't keep, and didn't even have a Semblance, but still managed to make things *better* for each character she met, not *worse*.

Meanwhile, the group has still just been causing trouble everywhere they turn up, and they're starting to realize that they can't blame *all* of this on the Afterans just being weird.

This would also end up tying in well with the troubled reaction Ruby has to getting Crescent Rose back, although I would not have Jaune have it, and only have Ruby get it back after an epiphany about how she doesn't actually *need* it to do what's right, or to have a positive impact on others, but keep her conflicted emotions on finding it again, as the weapon reminds her of her own past overconfidence and recklessness, her own belief that she could both literally and metaphorically just cut right through anyone or anything that didn't agree with her.

Also as much as a ton of people hate Jaune right now I honestly think he would've been a cool "villain" to illustrate the flipside of these messages. Like. Neo's great and all but she feels really superfluous and not exactly compelling enough to be the primary villain of the volume at this point.

I'm imagining Jaune being the same age, but the one with Penny's sword now, physically unable to let go of it, in some sort of daze of grief and self-loathing that's being further amplified by some aspect of the Ever After.

He is driven chiefly by a belief by if he'd only been "stronger", everything would've been better.

And in a twisted way, he gets his wish.

It turns out his Semblance can actually resonate with and empower a lingering "imprint" of Aura in Penny's sword to both make it stronger and to give him a sort of bastardized shadow of the Winter Maiden powers.

(Winter still has the "real" version, this is like explicitly a twisted, harmful bootleg version that would also be animated differently from any other usage of Maiden abilities.)

Using it harms him as well, and it's noted that Jaune seriously might eventually freeze himself to death just by continuing to hold on to the sword. His presence is also always preceded by a sudden chill.

Ruby quickly realizes and begins to have a crisis over the implication of Jaune being able to tap into a lingering fragment of Penny's Aura.

Namely, does that mean Penny is in some way... *actually still there?* And potentially *suffering*?

You could use the blacksmith lady to like foreshadow and then kinda explain how all of this is even a thing, so it's less confusing.

And then we get an actual answer to this question! 'Cause the big climax of the volume is now Jaune smacking the group around, they just barely get the upper hand again, and then Jaune uses the last of his strength, shifts the sword into MAXIMUM OVERDRIVE, everything looks Real Bad, but then...

The sword just... Explodes?

And out comes Penny's glowy green Aura ghost, who Jaune inadvertantly powered up enough for her to materialize herself, and whose first order of business is to turn around and briefly apologize before slapping the shit out of Jaune... Which goes right through him physically, but DOES seem to be able to immediately exorcize whatever horseshit was corrupting him.

Her second order of business is to be like "FINALLY! NOW maybe you'll LISTEN to me, Jaune!"

While Ruby is just standing there gaping like "A."

Before anyone (including the audience) can get their hopes up, Penny quickly explains that this is likely only a temporary affair brought about by how much Jaune has strengthened her, and that she can "already feel herself fading", but then smiles and adds on that she's super excited to see Ruby (likely followed by trying and failing to tackle-hug her because that just makes Penny fly straight through her)

Ruby, still, except this time she's clearly tearing up: "A,,,"

Followed by a conversation where Ruby gets closure and Jaune comes clean, but then Ruby confesses that honestly, even with Penny trying to tell her that she asked to be sacrificed and that Ruby should forgive Jaune... Ruby can't. At least not yet.

Ruby ruefully adds "No wonder nobody here really likes me..." to that, to which Penny immediately replies

"But *I* like you!"

And Ruby just scoffs and goes "Do you? Even though your death is my fault too?"

And Penny just sadly replies "Of course. Do you really have so little faith in me?", which kinda gets to Ruby, as it reminds her that her funk is negatively affecting others too. And that in a way, insisting that she's the worst person in the world is still a form of self-centeredness, just as it was to believe that she had all the answers.

She's silent until Penny begins noticeably fading away and dissolving into particles of light, which has Ruby going "Wait! Don't go! Jaune! Jaune, do something!"

But Jaune is of course Spent As Fuck and also probably has lowkey been struggling to stay conscious through this whole conversation, so they have no choice but to make this quick.

Penny gives Ruby one last fond, sorrowful look and says "I'm sorry not everything can go like it does in this story, Ruby. But you? You're still *writing* your story. And I for one can't wait to see how it ends! "

"You're not going to, though! You're never going to, because you-because you're-"

"Once again, Ruby: Do you really have so little faith in me?" Penny says with a teasing grin, before disappearing completely.

Aaand thats a wrap.

Yes it's weird and kind of cheesy, but your honor, my defense is that this whole show is weird and kind of cheesy.

#rwde #very slight nuts and dolts but i intentionally didnt lean into it #its not the point #this should be able to stand perfectly fine platonically

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moss-the-moon-moss · 1 year

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Hallo, I'm posting this entry like a week late but it's better than nothing tbh. Anyways this is my first weekly music update, i basically just talk about what music i really like from that week. I will be talking about new music i find, my favourite songs, what playlist im listening to the most and show my spotify stats as well😋

This week, due to the announcements related to Melanie Martinez's new album, I have gone back to my roots and have been listening to all of my favourite songs by her. Melanie has been one of my favourite artists for years now, probably since just before k12 came out!! It's really hard to decide on my favourite songs by her since I really like all of them; despite this I have still decided on my favourite song from each album/ep. From crybaby we have 'pacify her'; from k12 it was a bit harder to decide but i'm going to go with 'highschool sweethearts', and lastly from the after school ep we have 'The bakery'. In the last week almost all of my top songs have slowly become melanie, she's just really amazing like that I guess. Anyways i'm super excited for the new album, her new form is really pretty💕

Here is a playlist with all of my favourite melanie martinez songs!!

Some of the other songs seeping into my spotify stats are from a playlist I have called "WHAT IS THIS MELODY ''. This playlist has quite a bit of crystal castles in it. In Fact the overall theme of this playlist is just crystal castles and other songs that I think are kind of similar. I think that my favourite song this week was probably 'Goth' by Sidewalks and skeletons, this song is on the previously mentioned playlist as well!! I just really love how the song sounds, it's a good one to listen to on loop while doing things😊

Other artists I've listened to a lot this week are Lana Del Rey and Glass Animals. I really got into Lana near the middle of last year due to my friend who is a lana stan, and I'm honestly very grateful for it. Lana has so many amazing songs, i just sometimes feel like i'm on another planet listening to them, she managed to place in my top 3 artists during spotify wrapped last year lmao. I don't particularly have a favourite song by her at the moment but i think ultraviolence and art deco may tie with each other. Anyways moving onto glass animals, they have been my favourite band since around 2016. I initially found them through sally face and creepypasta animated memes; 'pork soda' and 'The other side of paradise' , , they really had a chokehold on us all istg. My favourite album by glass animals is probably 'how to be a human being' . Every single song on that album is a masterpiece, I literally cannot dislike any of them if I tried. My favourite song from HTBAHB is probably 'pork soda'; from zaba its 'black mambo'; from dreamland 'space ghost coast to coast', and finally my favourite single is 'golden antlers'🥰

Heres my favourite songs by glass animals!

And heres my favourites from Lana <3

Majority of the music at the top of my stats came from me listening to them on loop for hours at a time and also from exclusively listening to the same playlist for weeks. I haven't actually listened to them in a while. They're just still up there from listening to them so much. Fun fact "miss you" by south star has been in my top 20 for months now, i listened to it 399 times last year and i can't seem to get rid of it from my stats now. Anyways, I am now currently working to get rid of those songs from my stats😭

#Spotify #music #musicislife #indietronica #glass animals #lana del rey #lana stan #lana is our queen #melanie martinez #indie music #k 12 album #crybaby #sidewalks and skeletons

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satrs · 1 year

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ᴍɪꜱᴛᴀᴋᴇꜱ - ɪᴢᴀɴᴀ ᴋᴜʀᴏᴋᴀᴡᴀ x ꜰᴇᴍ!ʀᴇᴀᴅᴇʀ°4

Warnings: insult, gaslighting (like once), overall angst

"Get your crybaby ass on the couch. We need to talk."

His words rang your ear in a loop, filling you more with rage with every minute passing. "Izana, if you don't drop this childish act right now, I will-" "What? Leave me? Y/n, you know damn well you wouldn't. Your're to dependent on me. Look at yourself. Crying when I'm gone for just a few days. Your're the one with the child-like act." he interrupted you, again.

How many times did he interrupt you or ignored you the past few weeks, ignoring your pleas? Four times? Six times? No. Way to many for you to count. You were tired. Tired of the day, tired of him, tired of everything. You can't stand it anymore.

But you were to exhausted to argue with him. No, not now at almost four a.m.. "Go fuck yourself!", you shouted at him, voice cracking and making your way to the bedroom.

Quickly, he walked after you in quick steps, taking a hold of your arm, "Where do you think your going? I said-" " I don't care what you said fucker! And don't fucking touch me!" It was your turn to interrupt him now, swinging your arm out of his hold and storming into the bedroom.

"Y/n. Y/n! I said get back right now!", he walked after you, only for you to slam the door shut with a loud bang, locking it.

Trying to calm himself with a deep breath, he leaned against the door, "Y/n. Open up the door so we can talk this out", he said in a much calmer but tense voice.

He waited. One minute, two, three. His patience was running thin. Four minutes. Five. He snaped. Banging at the door with loud bangs and screams. "If you don't open up the door right fucking now I will do it myself! Do you hear me?!"

On the other side, you were sitting on the floor, back facing the door. Tears steamed down your face and your face was laying in your crossed arms while you heared the banging and screaming on the opposite side growing louder.

After what felt like forever, the opposite side suddenly fell into silence. The only sound that could be heared were your cries and... a phone ringing? Trying to surpress your tears, you focused your ears on the sounds you could perceive from the other side.

"What?!", Izana's loud voice rang your ears, making you jump slightly. After a long silence, you recognized Izana's voice again, "hold on a second", in amuch calmer tone now, listening his footsteps growing more faint, until there was complete silence.

He's probably gone. I hope so, you told yourself, standing up and opening the door but just slightly so you could see if someone was standing there. He really pissed off huh?

Whiping the tears from your face, you walked to the bed, plopping yourself on it, closing your eyes, I don't know how much longer I can keep doing this. You took in a deep breath, falling into a deep slumber.

"Couldn't you wait until tomorrow for this?", Izana's annoyed voice was heared on the other end of the line, making Mikey roll his eyes. "It's already tomorrow. And I think you want to know about this." "Mikey I swear to god-" "We got another track." Mikey interrupted him.

Izana jumped up from the couch in the living room of the estate, ears pearking up at the words mikey spoke, "Shinchirio?", his voice turned into a whisper, waiting for Mikey to continue.

The blond haired male let out a sigh, "Yes. My man saw someone that looked similar to him. It was about one hour ago, in the nearby town at a gas station."

The eyebrows of the white haired male knitted at that, "Well? Did you check?", he asked, expecting an answer.

"Of course we did, in vain. He didn't leave any traces. He didn't buy anything he just stood there and waited for someone. Before my man could confront him, a darkish blue 100 audi oldtimer stoped and he steped in. The license plate was covered. The car drove off to fast to be followed."

Izana listend carfully, waiting for him to continue, "Izana look, I don't think it was him. If he would be still alive, what I doubt, this behaviour doesn't suit him. At all."

"He is. I'm sure of that. He must have some reason to act like that. Tell me, did you saw him die? Or saw his dead body?" "No but-" "There is no 'but'. His ashes are not on the grave, nor at your old house", Izana interrupted him, rage filling his voice, "It seems to me that you just wish for him to be dead. Don't you have any shame, doubting the existence of your brother?", Izana questions, being met with silence.

A heavy sigh from Mikey broke the silence, "Alright, we'll keep looking. I'll leave you alone for now I bet Y/n missed you. By the way how is she?", he quickly summoned a new set of questions. Izana turned to the stairs at that, looking up in the direction of the bedroom. "She's fine. Keep me updated", he replied.

"Will do. See ya", with that, the call ended. The white haired male made his way up into the bedroom, mind clouded with the information he just got. I knew it, he's still alive. He needs to be. He definatly got an explanation for his dissapearance. Maybe he is wanted? In danger? I will find out at all cost. And bring him back.

He was now standing infront of the door, noticing the small gap. It's unlocked. There is no light either. Did she fall asleep? He walked into the room, turning on the light. He saw your sleeping figure on the bed, eyes slightly red and puffy with dryed tears on your face.

He walked up to you, looking at your sleeping form. Missed me? Doesn't look like it . He lifted his hand to your face to whipe the rest of your tears of with his thumb. Was I to harsh?, he asked himself, caressing your cheek. "I'm really stressed right now you know? And your tantrums don't make it better", he said, knowing that you can't hear him.

He brought his face close to yours, giving the top of your head a kiss, "I'm sorry my love, but this has priority", he lowly whispered, turning around to walk out of the room, ready to go to bed in the room next to yours.

Mistake number two.

#izana x y/n #izana x reader #izana kurokawa #tokyo revengers #tokyo revengers fic #tokyorev fanfiction #tokyo rev fluff

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yunalai · 10 months

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pre-corruption battle boss qiyana hcs pls? will take any crumbs

crybaby. always crying. if she wasn't crying she'd be pouting.

her code basically shackled her to being a helpless victim for decades, so while her mind was desperately trying to escape that horrible loop, she couldn't physically do anything;

hated the Ixtali brothers — in fact, she fantasized about killing them many times before Veigar finally reached her;

she was such a background character that every time her game's booth was updated, she became a smaller and smaller figure on the side illustration;

her code had beginnings of a "dark princess" idea that the developers dropped;

whenever she wasn't in a cutscene, she was angrily shouting at either of the protagonists or the villain — something they often ignored after listening to it for so many years;

the developers had also wanted to give her her own game, but never did due to her lack of popularity;

#axewhirl #⍙ — [ answered ]#⍙ — [ about ]#⍙ — [ battle boss ]

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mr-smith-stories · 2 years

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Mr. Smith #16: Mr. Smith The Lawyer

Saturday morning on the tenth of September, Mr. Smith woke up at dawn, rubbing his tired eyes as he ambled down in the direction of the kitchen of his parents’ home. He passed by the living room where his friends were smoking God- knows- what in a bong, probably glue again, with just a touch of catnip, because Kittty claimed it “gave kitty cats a rush.” As he passed by, an intoxicated Kitty swatted at Mr. Smith’s feet from his box in the corner, causing Mr. Smith to nearly trip and prompting Simon to burst into tears.

“You could’ve hurt Mr. Smith! He could’ve fallen and died! How could you? He’s only thirty years old, he can’t die now! He has his whole life ahead of him!” Simon sobbed.

“You’re so weird!” Amy said. “He would’ve been fine! You’re such a little crybaby!” Simon began to sob harder.

Mr. Smith went into the kitchen and poured himself a bowl of cereal. Today was his first big case as a lawyer, and he wanted to be prepared. Mom had told him it wasn’t good to go to trial on an empty stomach, so Mr. Smith decided to be a good boy and listen. He ravenously consumed his fruit loops, while Philip came into the dining room and sat down.

“Hey, Mr. Smith,” Said Philip. “I was talking to the others, and we all agreed. We want to watch the trial and support you there.”

Mr. Smith smiled and swallowed another spoonful of cereal. “Ok. The court case begins at 8 this morning.”

Philip nodded. “We’ll be ready. There’s a first time for everything, as the saying goes, right, Mr. Smith?”

Mr. Smith scratched his head. “Saying? I don’t know what that is.”

Philip shrugged. “I guess I set the bar too high. We’ll see you there, Mr. Smith.”

Mr. Smith went back upstairs and changed from his pijamas into his favorite suit, which he’d worn so many times it had holes in the sleeves and stomach area. He still wasn’t sure how the giant hole across his stomach area had gotten there, but he thought he looked professional enough.

Mr. Smith got into his car with his Dad in the passenger’s seat because he was too high to drive, and hit the gas. In the backseat were ten grocery bags. “What’s all of that?” Mr. Smith asked his father.

“Um, no-thing,” Said Mr. Smith’s father, Harold, crossing his fingers behind his back.

“You’re crossing your fingers behind your back. That means you’re telling the truth, right Dad?” Mr. Smith asked.

“Right, son. Just like I taught you in your psychology classes at the puppy farm. It means I would never lie to you,” Harold said.

“I love you, Dad. Thanks for helping me get this job.” Mr. Smith said.

“This judge is a sucker. All it took was a popsickle and the job was yours.” Harold sighed contently.

Once they arrived, Mr. Smith ran through the crowd with Harold trailing behind, and Mr. Smith’s stomach jiggled through the hole in his shirt. People were staring but Mr. Smith wasn’t sure why.

They were ten minutes late already, because Mr. Smith had forgotten what a green light meant and held up traffic for several minutes while cars honked at him until he remembered to go. Mr. Smith found his client, Bill Stevenson, shirtless in overalls and chewing on a piece of straw, looking very sophisticated before his big trial. Someone had accused him of internet fraud, catfishing two gay teenagers for money from their savings. Mr. Smith hadn’t paid attention to their names when he was hired, but he figured he could just act like he knew what he was talking about once they got to court. And now that day was finally here! Mr. Smith’s big moment!

Mr. Smith threw open the doors. “Hello, Judge Johnson! Hello, court people! I’m ready for my fifteen minutes of fame-“ Mr. Smith paused upon seeing the opposition, decked out in suits, and gasped. “YOU! The teenage gay geniuses are my oppopreposition! Oh shit! Oh no! What do I do? Now you’re going to ruin my career and make me look STUPID!”

Harold Smith used Mr. Smith’s tantrum as a diversion and slipped away to hide behind the podium. There was some whispering while the judge was obviously turned around and then the judge smiled and nodded, before turning back to face the crowd.

“Decorum!”’Shouted the judge, pounding his gavel. The courtroom quieted down, except for two girls giggling behind Mr. Smith- Susan and Amy.

“This reminds me of the time I went to court! The zoo was suing me because I tried to take a selfie with the alligators, and they had already warned me after I had tried to take a selfie with the lions the week before. I told them all to shove it. I did not deserve that $500 fine, it was so annoying! Good thing Mr. Smith’s father bribed Judge Johnson with those twinkies! Now I don’t have to pay a cent!” Amy said.

“Oh my God, the same thing happened to me after I took a selfie with the bears that tried to eat Mr. Smith! The zoo said I didn’t learn my lesson from what happened to my friend, and I said Mr. Smith isn’t my friend! I only hang out with him for his drugs!” Susan replied. They high fived each other.

“Are Leo and Ritchie, like, under arrest? Oh my God, they’re like, so stupid! Especially Leo! Did you know he’s a psychology major? I don’t think psychology is even real!” Amy drawled.

“Oh my God, they’re so annoying! WE’RE like master criminals, and compared to us, they’re, like, DUUUMB! We get away with everything!” Susan gave Amy another high five.

“Please, be quiet! We are trying to conduct a trial! If you don’t be quiet, you’ll be forced to leave!” Judge Johnson snapped.

“Fine. What-ever. We’ll listen,” Amy pouted.

Mr. Smith stood up, and heard snickers around the room, but was unsure why. He began his speech. “Bill Stevenson, my innocent client, is a victim of the corruption of society as a whole! Oh, this case represents the decline of morality in America and in this entire world! This will lead to the end of times- earthquakes, floods, tsunamis! All because Leo and Ritchie wrongly accuse my client of fraud!”

The Judge seemed impressed. “Did you write this speech yourself?“ He addressed Mr. Smith.

Mr. Smith began to mouth things and gesture with his hands. “It was too hard so Bob and Frankie did it for me, Your Horror.”

The Judge stifled a laugh. “Don’t you mean Your Honor?”

Mr. Smith scratched his head. “I don’t know what that is.”

“O-kay. Please continue.” Replied Judge Johnson.

Mr. Smith continued. “Leo and Ritchie, the rich elite! Oh how hard it is to be poor and working class like my client, stuck with a mediocre lawyer like me!” Mr. Smith paused. “Wait, Your Horror, what does mediocre mean again?”

“Don’t worry about it. Please continue.”

“As I was saying, Leo and Ritchie exploited the system by hiring a prominent lawyer to represent them! My client, Bill, poor Bill, is a symbol of the corruption of this society! Leo and Ritchie are stuck up rich jerks, and are not geniuses like me! They will never get away with this, I tell you! Never! I swear it on my mother’s grave, after corruption of society leading to the end of the world kills her! It’s all YOUR FAULT, Leo and Ritchie, the not- geniuses!” Mr. Smith wiped a tear from his eye over the emotional weight of the end of the world Leo and Ritchie would surely bring about.

The Judge turned around, and when he again faced the crowd had cheese puff dust all over his face and hands. “Very clever speech. Please continue.”

Mr. Smith felt a burst of confidence. He, at thirty years of age, would finally be a success! He would win this case and become a world renowned lawyer, defender of the helpless victims of rich sons of bitches like Leo and Ritchie! All he had to do was prove his one billion level IQ and the world would know his name- at least his last name, he was still too embarrassed about his first name being Petunia. “First of all, it’s because you’re GAY! Gay people are going to be the downfall of this great human race! You think that just because you like MEN means you’re better than us, and that you can sue people whenever you want! Well, I have one thing to say to YOU, Leonard Philips! I am NOT gay and never will be! You won’t convert me to the dark side!”

“My sexual orientation has nothing to do with why we’re here! Bill Stevenson is a fraud!” Leo insisted at the stand.

Mr. Smith addressed the witness. “Do you even KNOW what the word fraud MEANS?!”

Leo rolled his eyes. “Yes, do you?”

Mr. Smith began to gesture with his hands and mouth things. “No, I was hoping you would tell me. ANYWAY, Bill is an innocent man, I tell you! Leo and Ritchie are the TRUE criminals! Leo BULLIED the other students in his high school by being smarter than them! A stuck up intellectual who cared more about philosophy than to make the students who were mean to him feel better by intentionally FAILING ALL HIS CLASSES, like he should have done! Leonard Philips is a menace, I tell you! A menace! And Ritchie is almost sort of just as bad!”

“What did I do?” Asked Ritchie from his seat.

Mr. Smith pointed an accusing finger. “YOU are a bully too! You flicked Philip once and he began to cry! You’re a menace, just like Leo Philips! You have too much money and it made you spoiled, so you bully others to feel better than them! You’re immature for calling me childish just because I stamped my foot! I do NOT act like a six year old girl! YOU, sir, are responsible for your actions! You need to grow up and take responsibility instead of blaming others for your problems, you big MEANIE! If I lose this case and then my job, it’s all YOUR FAULT!”

“You just contradicted yourself.” Ritchie said with a snort.

Mr. Smith gasped. “Don’t swear at me! This is what I’m talking about! Immature BULLIES, both of them! If I don’t win this case, I’m going to quit, I tell you! Quit!”

The Judge turned around and then when he refaced the crowd, was holding a bag of Lay’s Potato Chips. He began eating them and remarked, “Fascinating point, Mr. Smith. Please, go on.”

“The evidence is all here! Bill Stevenson swore on his college diploma that he didn’t do it! You heard that, ladies and gentlemen of the jury! He may not have graduated high school, but I know he must have gotten that diploma somehow, because he told me, his trusted genius lawyer!” Mr. Smith yelled.

“This is a court of law! You can’t just take his word for it!” Leo argued from the stand.

“Oh, and I’m supposed to take yours? YOU are still a little child inside! You’re trying to bully my client because you have the emotional maturity of a toddler! Only someone who acts like a three year old would do such a heinous thing like accuse MY client of fraud! But at the end of the day, YOU must face yourself in the mirror! You must deal with the shame of how selfish and sadistic you are! YOU could put my client behind bars! It’s not fair to poor Bill Stevenson, an innocent man who you have viciously victimized!” Mr. Smith stamped his foot.

Leo raised his voice, exasperated. “I just want back the money he cheated me out of! Ritchie and I are planning on getting married when we turn 18, and we need that money!”

“AGAIN with the homosexuality! Your sexuality is NOT AN EXCUSE FOR ACCUSING MY CLIENT OF CRIMINAL ACTIVITIES! He is an innocent man, wih a wife and children! An innocent man whose life has been destroyed by your lies, by your homosexuality! You have devastated the heart and soul of this community, but never again! I think YOU should be behind bars! You think you’re better than us, but I’M the genius here! You need to be taught a lesson about disrespecting your elders!” Mr. Smith picked up a reporter’s pen and threw it across the room.

“I’m not making excuses! We just want to be together! This is ludicrous!” Leo snapped.

Mr. Smith gasped. “Your Horror, the oppopreposition is trying to call attention away from what we are trying to discuss here! Leo has been using so many words that I do not understand, and it’s not fair! He’s trying to confuse the courtroom and make me look STUPID! Throw him behind bars for his lack of respect before he makes a mockery of this courtroom!”

Leo snickered. “I think you mean “opposition.””

“Again with the large words! How on earth do you expect us to understand you when you use words we never learned in Kindergarten? How can I further my career as a lawyer if you confuse me into making bad arguments! You are a bully and are just trying to distract us from the truth! That YOU AND RITCHIE are the frauds!” Mr. Smith wiped sweat from his brow. Being a lawyer was such hard work! Thinking of all these complicated arguments was really taking its toll on him already. He had no idea being successful took so much energy!

“Opposition is not a big word!” Leo argued, desperately looking at the judge.

Mr. Smith took out a miniture white board he had brought with him and began to write big vocabulary words on it. “There are so many words that end in -tion, how am I supposed to keep up with them all? Frustration, hibernation, nation, motion! It’s hard enough to remember those, and I even forget what hibernation is sometimes! How am I supposed to remember all of those giant words? It’s too hard, Your Horror! Do you agree?”

The Judge now appeared to be sucking on a lollipop, but Mr. Smith wasn’t sure where he’d gotten it from. “Yes, yes, very clever. You make many excellent points.”

Mr. Smith prepared to drive the point home. “Not only do they use big words, but they are ATHEISTS, Your Horror! They have turned away from Jesus, my favorite film actor! I bet they haven’t read the Bible OR seen any of his movies! It is a crime against human nature to not have seen Jesus Christ Superstar! They will both bring about the end of times!”

“Jesus was NOT a film actor! Did you think he was in Jesus Christ Superstar?” Leo asked incredulously.

Mr. Smith scratched his head in bewilderment. “It’s his most famous film. All movies about Jesus feature him in it playing himself. He’s been in countless biographical films about himself!”

“Oh my God, you’re such an idiot.” Leo sighed.

Mr. Smith addressed the crowd. “I now call Ritchie to the stand!”

“Oh my God,” Ritchie groaned. “This is ridiculous.”

“Again with the cursing! Come to the stand and don’t be a stuck up intellectual jerk! I’m the genius here!” Mr. Smith stamped his foot.

“Just ask your questions, dipshit,” Ritchie said.

“Ok,” Said Mr. Smith. “What time did I wake up this morning?”

Ritchie replied, “I dunno, 7 am?”

Mr. Smith gasped. “Not again! You’re doing this all over again! It’s my worst nightmare come true! You can’t be smarter than me!”

The judge pounded his gavel. “You’re not here to try and prove you’re smarter than the opposition!”

“But I AM a genius, right, Judge?” Mr. Smith asked.

Mr. Smith saw a finger tap the judge’s shoulder, and the judge turned around again. This time when he turned back to face the crowd, he had cotton candy stuck to his face. “Um, yes, you most definitely are. Continue, your arguments are profound.”

Mr. Smith began to gesture and mouth things, pointing to places in space. “Does profound mean my argument is smart enough for a preschooler to understand?” He scratched his head in bewilderment.

“No, you idiot. Oh my God, you’re such a vapid moron!” Ritchie snapped.

Mr. Smith scratched his head. “Does vapid mean I smoke electronic cigarettes?”

“Jesus Christ,” Swore Leo from his seat.

“Please, continue, Mr. Smith,” Said the judge, who was now drinking a smoothie.

“Question one,” Mr. Smith began. “Why is this money so important to you? Is it important enough that you would wrongly accuse MY client of fraud to steal his hard earned salary?!”

“Leo and I intend to get married once we turn eighteen. He told you this already.” Ritchie said.

“But… do you HAVE to marry Leo? Why don’t you just let poor Bill here keep his money?” Mr. Smith scratched his head.

“We just want to be together. We’re in love,” Said Ritchie.

“LOVE?!” Mr. Smith exclaimed. Then he finally remembered he needed to be professional. “Define “love” for the court, please.”

“Uh, it means I care about him more than anyone so I want to marry him?” Ritchie said, annoyed.

“But… why?” Mr. Smith asked.

“Why? What do you mean why? I love him.” Ritchie looked confused.

“Why do you… LOVE him?” Mr. Smith choked out.

“Because he’s the smartest person I know and he cares about me more than anyone,” Ritchie replied.

“But… he’s a robot,” Said Mr. Smith.

“A robot?” Leo snapped.

“Yes, an emotionless robot. HOW can you care about anyone when you’re a cyborg? How can we even accept anything a cyborg says as true? You probably work for the government! It’s one giant conspiracy!”

“I’m not a cyborg, you absolute moron! I’m a human being!” Leo snapped.

“But… you’re emotionless! You bully people by being smarter than them! It’s cruel and unjust! All humans are supposed to have equal rights, and you take away their right to do as well by being smarter than them! It’s like I’ve always said, you strike fear in the hearts of others, a fear of insecurity, inadequacy and despair! You are a menace! Do you hear me, everyone? A menace!” Mr. Smith pounded his fist on a nearby table where his client was sitting.

“This isn’t even relevant to the case!” Ritchie snapped. “I’ve had enough of this! You come in here acting like you’re better than us because you’re straight, but you’re a total dumb ass!”

“Shut up, devil spawn! I’M the genius here and we both know that’s what me winning this case is really about!” Mr. Smith yelled.

“That’s the POINT! You’re not even taking this seriously! The only reason you’re still here is because your father is bribing the judge with food!” Ritchie shouted.

The Judge looked up with a piece of a hot dog sticking out of the side of his mouth. “Mmf!” He tried to speak. He swallowed the rest of the hot dog and protested, “How DARE you! I haven’t been eating FOOD while this session has been going on!”

“Everyone can SEE you!” Ritchie was exasperated.

“Can YOU see anything?” Mr. Smith asked the jury. They all scratched their heads in confusion.

“Oh my God! This is ridiculous! This is an unfair trial and this judge is just STUPID, just like you, Mr. Smith!” Ritchie yelled.

“Shut up, devil spawn! You can’t deny my obvious one billion level IQ! You’re just envious of me!” Mr. Smith yelled back.

“Quiet, Mr. Smith!” The judge pounded his gavel. “I’ve made up my mind. The jury is dismissed, I’M deciding this case!”

“You can’t do that in a court of law!” Leo desperately argued.

“It’s MY COURT, you asshole! I’m in charge here, this is my domain! But today’s your lucky day, because despite Mr. Smith’s father’s bribes, I’m ruling AGAINST HIM. No one calls me stupid!” The judge pounded his gavel again. “Bill is sentenced to fifteen years in prison and must also repay all the money he stole from Leo and Ritchie! Court is dismissed now! Bye losers!”

Mr. Smith then ran to the podium, grabbed the judge’s gavel from his hands and chucked it at a juror. Then he grabbed some of his father’s food from behind the stand and dumped it all over the floor. He then grabbed a water bottle and began pouring water all over the floor. “No drink for you!” He yelled at the woman whose drink he stole. Then he shouted, “Time for my dramatic exit!” He ran through the aisle, but he had forgotten he poured water there and slipped and fell on his face. “Oh no!” He grabbed a chair to hoist himself up, but accidentally knocked over the chair, falling with it. “Help!” He yelled. Then he finally remembered how to get up, but he forgot which way the exit was and tried to run past the food he had spilled on the floor, but instead slipped again in some ice cream. “Oh no! Now I look stupid!” Mr. Smith yelled. He tried several times to get up but kept slipping in the ice cream.

“Do you want some help?” Ritchie asked, offering his hand.

“No!” Mr. Smith yelled. “I won’t be condescended to by someone smarter than me!”

“Alright,” Ritchie said with a laugh, following Leo out the door.

Soon everyone had left, so Mr. Smith sat for fifteen minutes alone in the courtroom eating the ice cream with a spoon he found on the floor. “Yummy!” He smiled, feeling a lot better about how dumb he had looked, and even his failed career.

Finally after another ten minutes, Philip ran in through the door. “We all forgot you were here and left! Sorry! Here, let me give you a hand,” Philip offered Mr. Smith his hand.

“Philip, you’re my knight in shining armor,” Mr. Smith said with a sigh. “I love you. But no homo.”

“I love you too. Let’s get married- but still no homo. As long as we say it, we’re still both straight, we’ll just be single forever because a marriage has to be exclusive.” Philip said.

“Ok!” Mr. Smith said. Then they ran out of the courtroom away from the spilled food and drinks holding hands while saying “no homo” to everyone they met, got in Philip’s car, and Philip bought Mr. Smith an expensive engagement ring. Three days later they married at the puppy farm, and then drove off into the sunset with a “just married- but no homo” sign on the back of Philip’s car.

Fin.

***

#silly story #mr. smith #funny story #cute gay couple #fiction #fictional gay couple #amy and susan #original story #leo and ritchie #philip and simon #kitty #that awkward moment when you the judge are caught being bribed with food in the middle of the trial #marrying your best friend but saying no homo so it’s completely platonic and heterosexual

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sadistgalore · 3 years

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Chapter 12: Burn Together, Friends Forever

Previous | Next | Masterlist

Taglist: @elliei-m

Please let me know if you would like to be added/removed from the taglist.

CW: Heavy dehumanization, pet whump, torture, burning, branding, conditioned whumpee, slapping, verbal abuse, kicking, referenced whump of a minor (nonsexual), implied starvation, Luther is his own warning, boils, impalement, left outside in the cold, implied noncon

Harper’s stomach dropped as soon as she heard the bastard’s voice, and heard a hard whimper behind her.

“Naughty, naughty girl, Harper. I don’t think your master would approve.”

Harper huffed. “You lied. You said you had a dog, not a human!”

Luther glared. “What’s the difference?”

“The difference? You people are fucking impossible!”

“I would watch your attitude, kitty. You’re just making this worse for yourself.”

“H-Ha-Harper,” said a voice behind her. The girl turned around, seeing Killian look up with tears in his eyes, trembling. “D-D-Don’t m-m-make h-“

“Doggy.” A voice cut him off. “That sounds an awful like talking to me.”

Killian lowered back down. Harper noticed this, and her police instincts kicked in once again. “Stop talking to him like that. You’re mad? Then take your anger out at me, you’ve hurt him enough.”

Luther smirked. “Fine, kitty. Come here.”

Harper looked once more to the shaking boy, then followed the orders given. Luther went across the room, looking towards the wall lined with Dark’s torture devices. He finally picked a long metal cord with a wire attached to it, and plugged said wire into the wall.

“I don’t know why Edward insisted on picking a defiant one like you, there’s so many other trained pets with black hair he can just buy for a few hundred bucks,” he muttered, beginning to loop the cord around her right arm.

“Sorry that me trying to preserve my dignity is a problem for you,” she spat.

Luther chuckled, hand moving to a button attached to the cord. “We’ll see about that,” he finished as he pushed the button.

At first, Harper didn’t feel anything, but soon felt a warm sensation after thirty seconds or so. That sensation only kept growing into a burning pain. She gasped, soon realizing what Luther was intending to do, and began trying to pull it off.

Luther grabbed her hand, “Bad kitty. You better stay still unless you want Doggy to have this looped around his throat.”

Harper looked up, eyes beginning to form tears, and put her hand down. She soon screamed as the heat only increased, the hot metal burning into her arm.

“Ruff!”

“No, doggy. Your punishment is later.” Luther said without even looking up, admiring the smoke coming from the kitty’s arm.

“S-stop, please! I’m begging you!” Harper screamed, beginning to grow nauseous as she smelt more and more of her burnt flesh.

“Just another minute,” Luther hummed, causing Harper to yell in frustration.

That minute felt like hours, during which the pain became too unbearable and she fell to the floor. She writhed on the ground, other hand burning as she tried to pry the clip off to no avail. Luther bent down, ignoring her defiance, and pushed the button on the wire.

“Such a crybaby,” he said as he walked towards his shackled dog.

Killian began whimpering loudly, crying out as Luther began to unshackle his wrists.

“You’re a very bad doggy, you know that?” Luther said as he cupped his face, feeling the tears streaming down his pet’s eyes. “How are you going to make it up to me?”

“B-bark-“ Slap.

“Stupid mutt. Use your words.”

“I-I’ll,” Killian started, not quite sure how exactly he was going to make it up to his captor. “I’ll be a b-bet-ter dog-“ Slap.

“Well you’re pretty fucking terrible at that, aren’t you?!” The man yelled, making Killian flinch back. “Answer me! Aren’t you a bad dog?”

“Yes sir-“ Instead of a slap, Luther punched Killian hard in the face. He got up, beginning to kick him to each word he spoke. “Stupid. Fucking. Dog! Why are you using your words?!”

“I don’t know what you want from me!” The young man screamed, Luther seeing a defiance in his eyes that he hadn’t seen since he was 17. Killian soon snapped back to reality, cringing at the cruel smile of his captor.

“No, no, I’m sorry. Please, I didn’t- ruff! Ruff, ruff, bark, woof!-“

Luther grabbed his hair and began to drag him upstairs. He stopped as he passed the girl on the floor, the coil around her arm now turning into a dull red instead of the fiery orange. “I’ll be back kitty. Once I’m back, I expect you to have dinner prepared for me only. Neither you or the doggy are getting food for a while.”

He didn’t stop to hear the choked gasps of the kitty as he walked upstairs, ripping the poor boy’s scalp as he continued to be dragged. Once they reached the kitchen, Luther threw the dog on the ground and stepped on his neck to prevent him from escaping.

The man grabbed a pot and filled it with water, setting the gas stove burner to high as he waited for it to boil. The boy was crying openly, not bothering to whimper or whine as he saw the rare aggression in his captor’s face.

“Oh, Killian,” Luther sighed as he leaned against the counter, foot still pressing on the dog’s neck. “You were doing so well, I thought I finally broke you.” Killian’s cries filled the room. “Still, you’re too incompetent to follow the rules.”

After a few minutes of more sobbing and the man’s silence, the water finally stopped boiling.

“You need to learn, pup,” Luther said as he grabbed the pot handle with a towel. “The only one who can give anything in this world,” he dumped the pot on the boy, ears straining at the blood-curdling scream that came with it.

“Is me.”

____________

“Wonderful dinner, kitty,” Luther complimented as he finished the last few bites of his steak.

The girl said nothing, completely exhausted from trying to ignore the unbearable pain on her arm and using what little energy she had to cook a meal for the bastard.

She can’t imagine what Killian must be going through, though.

The said boy was still on the kitchen floor, screams long since stopped and have resorted to painful crying. His face was an angry red, only a few boils on his face since he covered most of the splash with his arms. But those were scaly and irritated, raw skin being exposed. Harper had mentioned giving him some medicine, but one angry look from Luther was enough to shut her up.

Luther stood up from the table, and snapped his fingers. Harper moved hesitantly towards him, Killian didn’t. “Your punishment isn’t over. Since you two want to bond so much, you can bond in the cold outside. And no meals for three days. Clear?”

Harper nodded, dreading the thought of being chained up outside into the freezing cold.

Luther gripped her chin. “I said, are we clear?”

“Y-Yes, sir.”

Luther said nothing as he walked towards a drawer, pulling out chains that had very thick cuffs attached to the ends. He tightly gripped her burned out, smiling as she screamed in pain. He dragged her outside and pushed her to the ground outside the porch, connecting the cuff to her ankle and linking it to the wall. He left, and came out with Killian who was also crying out in pain. He did the same procedure with him, and then flipped a switch on each of their ankle cuffs.

Harper flinched as she felt spikes just grazing her skin, regretting that as they seemed to break contact and draw blood.

“Hurts, doesn’t it?” Luther smirked, seeing the girl’s face in pain. They are spikes embedded into those cuffs; the more you struggle, the more they get into your skin. So you don’t try to run away, of course.”

Harper resisted the urge to roll her eyes and looked towards Killian, who was now crying again.

“I hope you learned your lesson today, kitty. I’ll be sure to tell Edward about this.”

“You branded my fucking arm,” Harper growled. “Dark said not to scar me.”

Luther gave the girl a cold glare. “You’re gonna learn, like all of his other pets did, that I’m going to do whatever the fuck I want with you despite if your master likes it or not. I’m sure you’ll see that in the nights we’re going to spend together, kitty.”

With that, the man walked back inside, content that his new playthings wouldn’t try running away.

Harper tested Luther’s claims by doing little movements with her ankle, but the spikes only dug into her skin more.

“Shit,” she whispered as she slumped against the porch behind her. “We’re gonna be impaled even if we moved an inch.”

Killian whimpered, but remained still as he curled up against the porch wall. Harper looked over to him, seeing spike-like scars on his wrists and ankles. “This isn’t the first time he put these damn cuffs on you, isn’t it?”

The boy shook his head.

Harper looked at him with a sorrowful look; she spent mere hours with this man, how long had Killian been with him? “Hey, we’re gonna be okay, alright?” Harper started, gently placing her arm on his non burnt shoulder. “I’m a police detective for Washington, D.C. My friend has been investigating this group for years, a rescue will come for me soon.” She said it more to herself than to Killian. “I promise.”

Killian listened to her words, but couldn’t get himself to believe her. He might have been a street rat, but he’s been missing for seven years. He’s met other pets like her, with reputations and hopes of being rescued. But he’s also met other masters, ones that have too good of a reputation to ever be met with repercussions for what they’ve done to their pets, like Luther.

But Harper was nice, nicer than most people he’s met in almost a decade of hell. Maybe the cycle will change. Maybe his torment will finally end.

He looked up at her, and smiled, and was met with a warm smile back. He nuzzled into her, and closed his eyes when he felt her arm wrapping around his back and running it gently. Together, they could try their best to remain warm.

Harper rested her head on Killian’s, and yawned as she prepared for an uncomfortable and cold night of sleep. “One day, Kill-”

Killian groaned. Harper chuckled nervously. “Sorry, I like giving people nicknames. ‘Kill’s’ not a good one?”

The boy shook his head, Harper thought some more.

“How about Ian?” She got a head nod in affirmation.

“Okay, Ian, one day we’ll get out of here together. From now on, I’m gonna do whatever I can to protect you, alright?”

There was silence for a moment, just their steady breaths filling the space, then a very silent,

“Alright.”

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stardustryewriting · 3 years

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Forgiveness isn’t easy

Summary: Midoriya accidentally reveals, that he was told to kill himself once. Bakugou seems to feel more guilty than originally expected, so they decide to talk it out.

Or: The author was pissed Bakugou's suicide taunt was never talked about in Canon, so she wrote a fix-it-fic. Sort of.

Also on AO3: here

Also, also I kinda messed with the timeline. But since this is about the interpersonal relationship between Izuku and Bakugou, it’s not too bad.

Lunch breaks weren't the most exciting part of a hero's day. Fighting villains was of course, taking the number one spot, in that perspective. Going on patrol, rescue missions and even filing reports were also decidedly more important events in a hero's work life. Lunch breaks were at the very bottom of the list. (Not that there was an actual official list. Just the one in Izuku's notebook.)

Still, Izuku couldn't really complain about being allowed to share his lunch with the other interns from other companies, most of which were his classmates (among them the three upper-class men known as the big three). Sitting in a big circle hearing them share stories of all kinds of life events while enjoying some semi-good food was a highlight of the day. A much needed highlight after the bummer that was finding out they weren't allowed to sit in the meeting. 'Don't worry about it, just a regular checkup on what everyone last heard from the league of villains', he heard FatGum assure Kirishima and Tamaki. Which was more than they had gotten from Endeavour. He just warned them not to stick their noses into other peoples business.

And while Izuku was disappointed at first, listening to Uraraka enthusiastically telling a story from her middle school time more than made up for that. He loved seeing her happy. Also seeing how relaxed everyone was, big smiles, talking about insignificant stories was so peaceful. A much needed calm contrasting their usual hectic life. Just sitting back, listening to Kirishima chime in, telling them about similar stories he had, while watching Todoroki who listened very attentively, soaking up information he was never able to get because of his upbringing, calmed Izuku in a way he never quite thought possible. Just existing, listening, laughing, vibing. He was truly happy. Of course it wouldn't last long.

"What about you Deku? Any great stories from middle school?", Uraraka asked innocently, big eyes full of excitement, as if she was expecting some wondrous adventures. Kirishima also smiled brightly, leaning a bit towards him, eyes shining. Todoroki shifted so he was facing Izuku more and Tsuyu next to him quirked an eyebrow questioningly. Only Bakugou stiffened, barely visible and shot him a look like a warning. Don't you dare, Deku. That's none of their business. Izuku was sure, had Bakugou actually said what he thought out loud, he would have used more swear words, but he got the gist even without them.

"Not really. To be honest, I was a bit of an outsider in middle school. So I did nothing great or fun at all", he stuttered, gesturing wildly with his hands in the process and trying to get them to leave it alone. He could feel the heat in his cheeks, it got worse with every word he said. He was sure they were beet red right now. That wouldn't help his case at all.

"Nah. I don't believe that", Kirishima interjected, conforming Izuku's fears. Kirishima let himself fall back on his butt supported his upper body on his arms, palms flat on the roof and smiled mischievously at Izuku, "I bet you got up to some great adventures and you just don't want to share. Were they embarrassing?" He winked at that and then laughed at his own joke for a second.

Izuku could feel himself trembling. He could feel the slight shake in his legs, not bad enough to be obvious yet, but it would be soon, could feel his heart rate spike and the sweat flowing more. Even worse, he could see Bakugou grinding on his teeth, his stare getting worse by the second and he knew it would become a metaphorical death stare soon. A few months back, before he even started UA, he would have been afraid of it becoming a literal death stare. Old Izuku would have run at the thought of that. And while he wasn't that Izuku anymore - wasn't the crybaby Deku anymore, but instead was the Deku that never gave up - he still wasn't too keen on provoking Bakugou. He could face him, could go toe to toe, but he would rather not. Not unless there was any real need to. And there wasn't any right now.

"It's alright, you know. We won't laugh. None of us were their best possible version in middle school", Uraraka coaxed him gently, mistaking his silence for embarrassment instead of the mortification it really was. Izuku didn't know how to answer that. He couldn't lie to them. They were his friends, they were always honest with him and they deserved at least as much in return. But he also couldn't tell them the truth - that Bakugou and his friends had bullied him relentlessly from the age of four until the end of middle school - so he decided on the middle way. A half truth wouldn't hurt anybody. (In retrospect, this was probably his biggest mistake, ever.)

"No really. I was bullied quite badly by some kids. I don't like to think about it", he said, trying his best to keep up his smile, so Uraraka wouldn't feel bad for asking the question. She did regardless, of course, because this was Uraraka and she was as loving as they come. But Izuku tried to reassure that no, he wasn't mad she asked and no, she didn't bring up all the bad memories again and no, he didn't consider her a bad friend because even though he hinted at it occasionally - when there was no way around it in a conversation - he never stated it outright so she couldn't have known. Yes, Uraraka was still his friend, he wouldn't end their friendship over something insignificant like that, was said more than once too. She really took this to heart.

"What exactly do you mean when you say 'bullied'?", Todoroki asked, after Uraraka had somewhat calmed down and while Kirishima and Tsuyu both went to shut him down ("You can't just ask something like that, dude" and "That's really impolite, kero") Izuku was just glad at least something was normal. Todoroki being out of the loop on everyday teenager stuff, as sad as the reason behind it was, was their measurement for a normal day. And this might still stand a chance at being another normal day.

"Ah, you know, the usual. Having things stolen, being mocked and called names, being told to go kill myself, being shoved around and beaten. Normal bullying stuff."

"Being told to go kill yourself?", Uraraka, Kirishima and Tsuyu exclaimed simultaneously and very loudly. Loud enough to have everyone look at them. There went the chance of this being another normal day, Izuku thought sadly, while trying to think of a way to diffuse the situation. He had done it again. He let something slip that should have never been known by another soul and the fallout was enormous. He could see Mirio walking over to them and he really didn't know how to explain the situation to his upper class man. He didn't even know what to say to his friends, who were still staring at him, silently demanding answers but also with much more pity in their eyes than Izuku could stand. He was sure Uraraka was about to cry and he felt the pressure behind his own eyes announcing the arrival of his own traitorous tears. But he wouldn't. He wasn't the Crybaby Deku anymore, after all.

"What are you guys on about? You're louder than normal", Mirio inquired gently, after he arrived in their little circle. He came to stand behind Uraraka and let his eyes wander shortly over every member of the group, before they landed on Izuku. Mirio mustered him a bit more thoroughly as if he was checking in on him wordlessly. Izuku nodded and tried to show a reassuring smile. He knew he failed even without having to look at Mirio,could feel himself shaking so much that it just had to be obvious by now. Not that suppressing that reaction would have helped him. Not now, when he was already so deep in this situation. So instead he did his best to swallow around the lump that was ever growing in his throat and took as deep a breath as he dared without it being too obvious. He tried to answer Mirio and hated how much his voice was shaking, despite his best efforts to calm down. The tears weren't far away anymore, and he hated that too. He wasn't the Crybaby Deku anymore.

He refused to be the Crybaby Deku any longer.

"It's fine, we just shared some old school stories and I have some not some not so pleasant memories. We try to be more quiet, promise."

"Bullshit", Kirishima exclaimed loudly and it took an awful amount of self-control for Izuku not to flinch. He couldn't, he told himself, not anymore. "A stolen pen or some taunting words that's a not so pleasant memory. Being told to kill yourself is just all messed up, dude. That's wrong on so many levels."

"Yeah. That's not something you just gloss over so easily", Uraraka agreed immediately in a voice that left no room for argument. Not that Izuku would have known how to argue with that. They all took it much too seriously. It wasn't like Izuku had even considered it. At least not for long.

"It was just once guys", he tried again to calm them down once more, "I don't think he even thought about it too much." And really Izuku can't help his eyes looking at Bakugou for even just a second. Bakugou, who was uncharacteristically quiet ever since that discussion started.

"If I may", Todoroki interjected carefully and Izuku couldn't decide if he was happy about this or not, "what exactly did they say?" So definitely not happy about this. If anything that was even more cause for concern. How should he answer this? Honesty was off the table. Being honest would mean admitting to being quirkless. He couldn't possibly do that.

"I, ah-. I mean… You see. I mean they said… Uhm-"

"Jump off the roof and hope you'll be born with a better quirk in your next life."

All of their heads snapped towards Bakugou so fast that Izuku worried for their necks. He himself couldn't face his oldest classmate even though he knew he should. He wasn't a coward anymore, he should be able to face Bakugou. But he couldn't. Instead he kept his head down and played with his fingers hoping that the attention was off of him for good.

"Oh yeah", Kirishima said suddenly, brightly, as if he forgot the weight of their topic for a second, "You and Midorya were in the same middle school, right. You know the guy who said it?" And there it was again, the heaviness that had taken over their lunch break, seeping back into Kirishima's voice.

"I did it", Bakugou said with a tight voice, as if bracing himself for the worst. That got Izuku to glance at him. He wished he didn't. Those tight, hunched shoulders, the careful looking eyes, the tension in his body - as if he was ready to run as soon as the need arises - looked so wrong on Bakugou. Out of the corner of his eyes he could see his friends surprised expressions, as if none of them could believe what they just heard. Of course they couldn't. They knew of Bakugou's explosive temper and the harsh way he worded everything. It was attributed to him being insensitive. Not to him being a bully.

"What? That's a really bad joke", Kirishima said, tone more pleading than anything else. Please tell me you're joking hanging in the air between them, unspoken. The others seemed to hold their breath, the uneasy silence between them stretching until it became unbearable. Until it was hard to breathe. Izuku couldn't stand to look at it any longer, he wanted it to be over. He had to say something. Anything. He needed to end that situation. Bakugou was faster.

"It's not a joke. I said that and then I went off laughing", Bakugou confirmed, sounding way too calm in Izuku's ears. Almost resigned. That couldn't stand.

"Dude-", Kirishima mumbled weakly, leaving the word hanging in the air, as if he wanted to say something else. He wanted to, Izuku was sure. But much like everyone else, he had been shocked into silence. There were a million things to say, all of them tumbling over each other in Izuku's head.

It was such a long time ago.

It hurt then, but I'm over it.

It was mostly a joke, I'm sure.

I knew Kacchan long enough to know it wasn't meant like that.

It's fine now, I promise.

What he said instead was: "I only considered it for a week." It was decidedly the worst of all the things he could have said. It was enough for all of the heads to turn back towards him, still way too fast and he could see Uraraka considering what she wanted to say to him for that, could hear the gears turning in her head. Just as much as he could feel Kirishima getting defensive in his stead.Over him. He decided he needed to be faster than both of them.

"I mean, it wasn't that bad honestly. I knew Kacchan long enough to know how he was. The bullying had been going on for long enough already that I didn't even take it that seriously. It wasn't even that bad", he could feel this spiralling more and more out of control with every word he said, so he decided to just be silent instead. He was obviously only doing more damage.

“Please don’t make a big deal out of this”, he pleaded, finally, because it was obvious he wasn’t getting himself out of this situation anytime soon.

“Make a big deal?”, came the incredulous reply - from Bakugou, which surprised everyone including Bakugou himself - while everyone turned their heads yet again, “I told you to kill yourself, hell, you just said you considered it and now you’re saying they’re making too big of a deal out of this? You really are just a shitty nerd.”

“Maybe”, Izuku answered quickly, because he felt more than he saw, that everyone was getting ready to defend him once again, “but the past is in the past. I’d like it if it remained there.”

Bakugou seemed to consider him for a while. Then his eyebrows drew together making the infamous angry crease on his forehead. Something which Izuku knew firsthand meant he was ready to blow up. He didn’t. Instead Bakugou looked around, shrugged his shoulders and quickly left the group with just a mumbled `Whatever`.

No one tried to stop him.

They all turned to Izuku, eyes full of worry, stumbling over themselves and each other, while similarly trying to assure he was fine, as well as trying to advise him to talk about his experience to someone. Izuku promised he was alright, that he would look for help, if he felt like he needed it and that there were no more suicidal thoughts in his head. The last one was a half-lie, that he mostly told them to reassure them. Thankfully, no one questioned that too deeply, only Mirio looked as if he didn’t believe a word Izuku said.

Mentally he prepared himself for a long afternoon.

____________________

He was both right and wrong. While the afternoon did drag on for what seemed like forever, thanks to a combination of boring patrouille with no incidents and a look into what a hero’s paperworks look like, he hasn’t felt any tension between himself and Bakugou, which was the main thing he feared.

That was of course mostly, because Bakugou avoided him like the plague, when he could. He went on patrouille with one of Endeavor's sidekicks, instead of them, chose another sitting space for the paperwork than he and Todoroki did and even worked a bit overtime, to avoid having to go home with them. When he was forced to interact with them, because Endeavor explained or showed something and he required all three of them to be present, Bakugou treated him very normally. Which meant hostile and with demeaning nicknames, but no one could point out the difference.

It made Izuku tense. He always expected a big explosion, figuratively or literally, to be around the corner. Like the smallest thing would set Bakugou off and then all of them would suffer the consequences. But it never came. Bakugou’s personality provided some smaller emotional explosions, which all of them were used to by now, but the big one was missing.

Izuku didn’t know if he was supposed to be happy about that. He kind of wished it would just go off, that Bakugou would just throw it at him, so they could be done with that. Of course, he couldn’t say it to Bakugou like that, that would set off an entirely different, completely unwanted explosion, which would help no one in the end.

Izuku had considered if the potential consequences were worth another fight with Bakugou. Fighting was how Bakugou communicated the best with Izuku, it has been since they entered U.A. - probably even before that, if Izuku considered everything. So maybe another fight, to help Bakugou with sorting through and expressing his feelings, would be worth another house arrest. Then again, no one guaranteed him it was really just house arrest and not expulsion, he would be facing.

So, no fight then.

Still, he needed to find a way to either talk to Bakugou (unlikely) or just make the other blow up in his face (more likely). He would’ve liked to ask for help, but the only one in Endeavor’s agency who knew what happened on that roof was Todoroki. And while Todoroki was a treasured friend that Izuku wouldn’t want to miss, interpersonal relationships weren’t really his strong suit. So asking Todoroki for help was out of the question.

He pulled his phone from under his pillow, to sort through his messages, trying to figure out if another one of his friends would be helpful. Iida had sent a message, stating that Uraraka had informed him of what happened on the roof and offering to listen, if Izuku wanted to talk to someone. Uraraka and Tsuyu had both sent messages, asking if he felt alright, and he sent them some short, reassuring answers, because he still felt bad about everything that happened.

At the very top of his chats, however, were some messages from Kirishima, that Izuku was hesitant to read. Because while Kirishima was defending him in the moment it happened - and Izuku knew he was too nice to ever blame him for anything that happened on the roof - he was still Bakugou’s friend. His best friend even, probably. (If Bakugou had something like that, which Izuku wouldn’t know.)

What could Bakugou’s best friend have to say to someone, who complicated their entire situation?

Logically, Izuku knew Kirishima was probably just checking in on him too, maybe even trying to lighten the mood with some absurd fun facts, or bad jokes he’d gotten from Kaminari. He knew Kirishima wouldn’t even dream of blaming him. Still, he hesitated to open the messages. What if Kirishima said something about Bakugou? Would that be good or bad in his current situation? Then again, Kirishima might be the only one who could help him understand Bakugou in his current situation.

Uraraka was too emotional, she would be mad at Bakugou and she would encourage him to some “righteous fury”. Tsuyu never really liked Bakugou, she always thought he was too loud and too rude, so she never really tried to get to know him, beyond the surface level they needed to work together. Even then, that barely worked. Iida had too strong of a personality, he clashed with Bakugou in the past because of it. So really Kirishima was his best bet.

Taking a deep breath, Izuku opened the seven unread messages.

Hey Midoriya, read the first, I hope this thing on the roof didn’t get to you too badly.

I tried to get Bakugou on the phone and over text, but he doesn’t respond to me.

Or to anyone else really. Must be a sign he feels bad.

Maybe you could try talking to him?

Only if you’re up to it of course. If not, no worries. Knowing Bakugou, it’ll fade eventually, anyways.

Anyway. If you wanna talk about anything, know I’m here. I’m not too great with advice, but I’ll try.

Really, you shouldn’t be facing this alone.

Izuku read through all of them, more than once while trying to process everything Kirishima had said. Bakugou wasn’t only avoiding him, he was avoiding all of them. Did he feel bad, like Kirishima said? Izuku knew that his middle school time was a mostly unpleasant memory for him, being bullied and deliberately excluded, not having a single friend. Most of his teachers were annoyed with him, because he constantly came to try and talk about the bullying, so he eventually stopped talking to them outside of class matters. Which meant most of his interaction with other people were classes, being made fun of and his mum.

It was a lonely time.

Bakugou, on the other hand, had been the king of the school ground. He was academically smart, like Izuku, but unlike him he never bothered the teachers, so he was pretty well liked with the staff. Their peers always thought his quirk was super cool, so they willingly followed Bakugou everywhere he went and easily joined in teasing Izuku. No one batted an eye when teasing turned into bullying and Izuku didn’t even recognise it himself, until long after middle school was over. Even now, he didn’t like calling it bullying.

Was Bakugou really feeling bad about that time? Did he hate his middle-school-self, as much as Izuku hated his?

Maybe, he should take the help Kirishima had offered, between the lines.

Hey Kirishima, he began texting, I promise I’m fine. I’m a lot tougher than I look, after all. But about talking to Kacchan. I think that’s a great idea. How do you think I should approach that?

____________________

An hour, and several text messages later, Izuku found himself standing in front of Bakugou’s room in Endeavor’s agency. It was the one at the very end of the hall, right across from Todoroki’s room and next to Izuku’s own. He never knew Endeavor had bedrooms in his agency, but now that information was permanently engraved in his mind. (And in his hero notebook). It wasn’t particularly helpful in his current situation, tho.

Izuku took a deep breath, reminding himself of Kirishima’s encouraging words and knocked on the door. He heard shuffling from behind it and a string of curse words way more colorful than Bakugou’s usual. Just then, Izuku remembered that Bakugou always went to sleep early and was probably already in bed, when Izuku decided to come over. His timing couldn’t have been worse. Maybe he should just go and pretend he was never there.

Just as that thought entered his head, the door creaked open. Bakugou was wide-eyed when he recognised Izuku for only a second, before his trademark annoyed expression took over his face. So much for just vanishing before Bakugou could see him. Not that he would’ve actually done it.

“What?”, Bakugou grumbled annoyed, but thankfully not looking like he had already been asleep. Actually he wasn’t looking at Izuku at all, which was out of character enough that Izuku was actually worried.

“I wanted to talk about...”, the roof? Not really. It had started it all, but it wasn’t anything controversial. The roof-situation was pretty straight forward, even if all his friends acted like it was the big thing of the day. “...middle school.”, he finished lamely, because he figured that would be a way better starting point. At least there was some actual conflict there.

“Yeah, because it started in middle school”, Bakugou murmured sarcastically, rolling his eyes. Nonetheless, he turned and walked back into his room, leaving the door open. Izuku figured this was as much of an invitation as he would get. Not trying to look for a fight, he just scrambled quickly and wordlessly into Bakugou’s room.

Looking around, he realised that while Bakugou might have not been asleep, he must have been trying. The covers were thrown back and messed up and the pillow looked like it had been laid on. So he did disturb Bakugou. He couldn’t help feeling guilty.

“You wanted something”, Bakugou reminded him, not as unfriendly as usual, but also not nicely. It was accompanied by a glare that told Izuku he wanted to get this over with as soon as possible. Too bad, Izuku would take as long as he gets.

“Yeah”, he drawled, trying to figure out how to phrase this best, “what do you mean, when you said it didn’t start in middle school?”

“I never said that”, Bakugou was quick to correct, sitting himself on the ground in front of his bed and crossing his arms in front of his chest. He leaned back against the bed, glare permanently on Izuku, as if he was trying to figure something out.

“You implied it”, Izuku answered easily, trying to muster a reassuring smile, but thinking better of it. Bakugou would probably take it as Izuku thinking of him as weak and that would start another fight. Izuku was trying to end a fight, not looking for a new one.

“So what”, Bakugou said defensively, looking away from Izuku for real now, and instead staring at the floor.

“When did it start for you?”, Izuku inquired, trying to find a balance between being careful, to not sound accusing and not being too careful, so Bakugou wouldn’t take it as Izuku making fun of him. Talking to Bakugou has always been a balance act for Izuku.

Bakugou mumbled something that Izuku didn’t understand, then drew his legs to his chest, wrapping his arms around them and putting his face on his knees. He looked strangely vulnerable like that, so very not-Bakugou, that Izuku was convinced he hallucinated for a second. He pinched his leg to make sure he wasn’t. That was new.

He moved to sit beside Bakugou, before he could think of whether that was a good idea or not. With his back against the bed and his legs outstretched on the floor, Izuku looked over carefully, to determine if Bakugou was okay with that. The other looked at him funny for a moment, but didn’t say anything against it, so Izuku figured it was okay. There was still an arm length of space between them anyways.

Regardless, Izuku felt like this was the closest he got to Bakugou in years.

“Can you repeat that?”, he asked carefully keeping the careful tone out of his voice to not patronise Bakugou. He knew that would only make things worse.

“I said it stated, when I refused to take your hand”, Bakugou repeated, sounding annoyed, but some other way than normally. Izuku, for his part, was mostly confused.

“What?”, he said like an idiot.

“When we were, I don’t know, maybe six”, Bakugou explained and now he sounded like he normally sounded, when he was annoyed at Izuku, “I fell in that river and you offered me your hand to help me out. I thought ‘Why is that quirkless idiot looking down on me’. I was such a stupid child.”

“I wasn’t looking down on you”, Izuku provided, because it was the only clear thing on his mind. Bakugou still thought about that? That was so long ago, even Izuku barely remembered that day.

“No shit”, Bakugou barked out, laughing humorlessly at the entire thing, “It spiralled from there. I antagonized everything you did as you looking down on me and I began hating you from there.”

“And then it reached its peak in middle school?”, Izuku asked, unsure if he read where Bakugou was going with this right.

“And then it reached its peak in middle school”, Bakugou conformed tonelessly, like he had no more power for any emotions other than resignation.

“Wow”, Izuku breathed, looking away from Bakugou and staring at the wall instead. That was a load of information and he had no idea how to process any of that. Bakugou thinking he looked down on him, when it was really the opposite? And then, he had been antagonising Izuku for that long? He got that Deku was meant to be an insult, but he always thought it stemmed from ‘Kacchan’ being taken as too cute by Bakugou, not from actual hatred. That was a lot to stomach.

“What did you mean when you said you considered it?”, Bakugou surprised him by asking, Izuku expected to be thrown out, actually.

He didn’t actually know how to answer this. He would love to lie to Bakugou, saying that he just mulled it over in his head, but that felt wrong. Bakugou had been honest with him, so he deserved honesty in response.

“Did you know that one of the staircases was always unlocked because of potential fires? I figured out a way from there to the roof. I actually made it on top of the railing one afternoon. I was just standing there, looking over the courtyard and thinking ‘Maybe I will have a quirk, next time’. I almost took the step, and then I remembered Mom would be all alone, inconsolable and I backed out. I thought of myself as a coward then, but now I’m glad.”

He didn’t dare look at Bakugou, even when he heard the other’s breathing hitch. Knowing he was so close to ending it all, actually scared him still to that day.

“Shit”, Bakugou breathed, sounding like he had trouble swallowing and Izuku laughed humorlessly.

“Yeah shit”, he agreed, lifting his eyes to look at Bakugou and finding the other boy already staring at him. He had tears in his wide-blown eyes, looking like he was on the verge of a panic attack and Izuku was trying hard to remember the breathing exercises they learned in the theoretical rescue class. Luckily he didn’t need those.

Bakugou caught himself, looking away from Izuku and slouching against the bed again.

“You almost killed yourself. And it was my fault”, he said, still sounding breathless, but appearing a lot more calm overall. That was, until Izuku saw the single tear sliding down Bakugou’s cheek.

“No, it wasn’t”, he hurried to say, hoping to provide some solace to Bakugou, “Being quirkless is a lot worse than just some bullying. Not having the prospect of being a hero took almost as big a toll on me. And there were plenty other things.”

“Bullshit”, Bakugou yelled and Izuku cringed, glad that Todoroki was a heavy sleeper. Bakugou would’ve woken him up, “I put the idea in your head. I started the whole mess. Hell, I’m responsible for ‘Deku’.”

“Deku is my hero name, you know?”, Izuku reminded him, trying to diffuse some of their newly acquired tension.

“Yeah, whatever the hell that’s about”, Bakugou shrugged, not paying him much mind. Like he was trapped in his own thoughts and if his facial expressions were anything to go by, those weren’t pleasant.

“It’s symbolic”, Izuku provided, hoping to ease some of the burden, “It’s supposed to symbolise that I’m not the old crybaby Deku anymore. I’m Deku, the hero. I’m there to help people and I’ll never give up, no matter the obstacles. It means that I’ve learned from my past, but it doesn’t define me.”

“That’s sappy”, Bakugou said, trying to suppress a sniffle.

“Yeah, maybe”, Izuku agreed easily, fondly remembering the day Uraraka gave a new meaning to the name, “but it’s also true. I’m able to work with you, because I’m not overly attached to the past anymore.”

“S’that also why you’re able to forgive me so easily?”, Bakugou asked sarcastically.

“Yep”, Izuku said grinning, popping the ‘p’ to emphasize. He apparently had caught Bakugou off guard with that answer, if the wide eyes and the silence were any indication. They looked at each other silently for a while. Izuku gave Bakugou space to figure out what he wanted to say, while Bakugou just seemed overwhelmed with the situation as a whole.

“You shouldn’t”, he concluded eventually, looking away from Izuku once again, “I was shitty and you should hate me.”

“I told you before didn’t I?”, Izuku was intensely looking at Bakugou, as if he could will the other to return his gaze, “The past is in the past and I’d like it to stay there.”

Bakugou scoffed at that, looking at Izuku challenging, and Izuku already tried to find where he went wrong. He knew this could only end in a fight, it always did with Bakugou. This whole talk had been way too peaceful and Izuku made the mistake of indulging in it, instead of being careful.

Bakugou surprised him, when instead of challenging him to a fight, he just said: “Okay. I think I can do that.”

Deku blinked once. Twice. Trying to figure out if this was some sort of joke at his expense, again.

“Just”, Bakugou began, interrupting himself to take a deep breath. He let go of his legs, to stretch them in front of him like Izuku did and then turned to face him better. He scooted a bit closer, leaving only half an arm length between them, so Izuku could now reach out to him, if he wanted. He wanted to, but he didn’t want to ruin their new-found peace, so he held himself back.

“I’m sorry, for everything”, Bakugou pressed, after taking a deep breath, stubbornly staring into Izuku’s eyes. It wasn’t the best apology Izuku’s ever gotten, but considering who was in front of him, it was a big step in the right direction. So he smiled at Bakugou, as a sign he accepted the apology.

He had a feeling Bakugou would have a much harder time forgiving himself than Izuku did.

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urlocalbunny · 4 years

Text

.dacryphilia - ethan.

warning: throatfucking/ he gets off on elo crying about ANYTHING in her life just like the author. i kinda felt like i self inserted because damn, last week i cried over soap!

i did not proofread AGAIN lolol

enjoy this 1.326 words of cursed content!

Some things never really impressed Ethan. After all these years going to clubs every day, he noticed the patterns in every chick's strategy to seduction. The way their hips swayed, their staring, and the way they'd talk.

He created even some patterns to make them like him a little more, even if Beliath stole the show and cockblocked him every time.

But Ethan did not know one thing: why the fuck crying made him pop a boner harder than he ever could with any fuck.

Every time he saw someone crying, he felt the blood rush to his lower half. Of course, it was not every time. Sometimes the situation panicked him too much to want to do anything, but if he was calm and some girl started crying, he would fucking love it.

That's why he was pumping his dick so hard right now.

Eloise and Ethan argued a few days ago. She got angry and shed a few tears, yes, but her pretty face all wet, and her cursing was so fucking hot that he practically couldn't stop cumming. Every time they would argue over something stupid like laundry or dishes, Eloise would cry. She cried often, and Ethan didn't even feel bad because even if she ended up being right, she would sniffle, so his head didn't keep cursing him for jacking off to a crying girl.

He just really wished she was sobbing when he was inside her, just the way she would cry, and the tears would fall off...

"Fuck yes, Eloise, ugh!" He whispered, cumming again all over the sheets. He was starting to get angry. He thought about her crying, and he popped a fucking boner even if his hands were full of cum.

His dick was red and overstimulated this time, so he finally laid down, trying to catch a break that did not last long because he took a bath and cleaned his room. He felt fucking ridiculous.

"Ethan, are you in there?" Raphael called, knocking on the door. "It is about Eloise. She got mildly injured, and she is waiting for you in her room right now."

He shot up, humming something positive and listening to the older vampire getting inside his room. Catching his bag, he almost jumped his stairs to her bedroom. What could this dumb girl have done to herself? A broken rib? A concussion?

As soon as he reached for the handle, however, he froze. Eloise's tiny cries made his dick throb. He felt guilty, so he rushed in and sat down to finish this and run away. When he opened the door, he saw her on the bed with a cut on her arm.

"What did you do to your arm, pest?" He grumbled, catching a pillow and resting on his lap to hide his boner. Her face was red, and she was sniffling.

"I was trying to make me a sandwich." She pouted, showing him the cut. He sighed, starting his job of cleaning her wound silently and finishing it with bandages.

"You better stop doing this kind of stupid thing to me. If you can't cut a bread, how are you supposed to cut somebody's throat when it counts?" He scolded, cleaning his hands. "the cut is enormous, Eloise! Looks bigger than the fucking bread I brought itself!"

Her face scrunched up, and she looked at him as if he just told her she wasn't worth it, or like he kicked a dog. Or even like she was the kicked dog.

He knew that face.

"Hey, I'm just saying this because I wo-"

"Why are you so meeean?" Her sobs filled the silence in the room. Ethan's dick was throbbing so damn hard that he felt the urge to moan.

"Stop fucking crying every time I try to take care of you!" He snarled, making her sob harder. "Shit, I'm not going to hurt you!"

"I know, but I can't stop crying! Hic- you know I'm a crybaby!" She lamented, making him wriggle his body in anger.

The pillow fell off, and it was too late as her eyes zeroed on his very, very hard dick. "What the fuck, Ethan?" She threw a pillow at him.

"Look, I can't help it! You're crying so hard that I-" she gasped.

"You get off on me crying?" She asked.

Silence.

"Look, I'm going to leave. Fucking forget about this." He ran off and closed the door, but then he winced. "How stupid, Ethan! Hypnotize her!"

He came back, ready to reach for her, but her hand grabbed the loops of his pants first. She seemed surprised... Excited, even? She then kneeled and giggled. "Hey, I- can I see it?" The girl asked. "You got hard..." She whispered, her eyes never leaving his pants.

"Why would you try to see it?" He asked, backing up a little.

"Well, I've never touched one before, you're right here, and you're hard over something random. Besides, you've been getting to cum while I was angry. You could make it up to me."

Ethan sighed. That was the worst situation possible. But he should make the most of it now that he got busted.

He unbuttoned his pants and let his dick slap the bridge of her nose. She grabbed it.

"You're big." She said lowly, squeezing it to see him hiss. "Turn around, hold yourself against the wall," she blew air into the tip. He rutted. "You're responsive too."

"Are you making an essay out of it, or you're going to suck my cock?" He answered flatly.

She shoved him inside of her mouth and slurped as a warning before starting to Bob her head. He took one of her hands, putting it on top of what she couldn't handle. She pumped him. He'd say this was being rough because of her lack of experience, but the look on her face gave off that her roughness was because he nagged at her.

Little did she know that that's just how he liked it. He started to push his lips lightly, feeling her throat engulf him, and then he was gone. Eloise choked, humming angrily at his lack of warning, but then she pulled him towards her carefully as to say she would be alright with him fucking her throat.

He then pushed, feeling the way her tight throat swallowed and gagged around his cock, making tears stream down her face.

Another wet sound made Ethan look closely, seeing her dress lifted. She was touching herself.

He could not help but moan as she gagged around him, holding his thigh for support and occasionally feeling him up.

"Are you okay?" He breathed, getting a thumbs up and another slurp as an answer. He kept going. Her hair was around her face, and her eyes were shining so brightly when she looked at him. She was still crying, but now it was because of the way he fucked her throat, maybe because fingering herself felt good? He didn't know, but he didn't want it to stop.

She hummed around him urgently, her legs shaking under her.

"Fuck, are you- are you cumming because I'm fucking your throat, baby?" He cooed, snickering when she seemed to agree. He was not far. "I'm close too, so swallow everything, alright?"

He kept pumping, trying to hold in, to relish in the feeling of her moaning against his cock and her teary eyes looking at him.

When she sniffled, it was just too much.

His legs stilled, and his muscles seemed to flex where she held him, swallowing as best as she could. He didn't want to pull out, but he did to see that she didn't let one drop fall.

"Fuck... That was..." Ethan started.

"Hot as fuck?" She rasped, resting her head against his thigh. He helped her up.

"I hope that was not a one-time thing." He said lowly, moving to taste himself in her mouth.

"Well, I do cry a lot." She laughed.

"Kinkshaming after sucking me off, huh? That's kinky."

"Shut up."

#moonlight lovers headcanons #moonlight lovers fanfiction #moonlight lovers #moonlight lovers ethan #bunny's writing #kinktober 2020 #ethan x eloise #ethan headcanons #ml ethan #nsfwbunny

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sortavibing · 3 years

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Hii could I request a matchup please?

My name is Eva, i'm 17 and any pronouns work for me.

I'm asexual but for a romantic relationship i usually prefer boys.

I'm 5'2 and i have grayish blue hair at the moment. I don't stick to any specific clothing style, I usually just wear what I like tho. I have pretty big eyes ( I used to be called an alien bc of them when i was little) and I am half russian.

I am a libra sun, leo moon, sag rising and an ESTP 8w7. I was told that i am pretty intimidating when you first meet me, but after you get thru this facade i am usually a really hyper person. I joke around all the time and sometimes i can be pretty mean but nothing too bad. I love anything that gives me an adrenaline rush (i'd risk anything most of the time just to have fun). I really like having late night talks and laughing with my friends. I dislike when i'm told what to do and when people pry into my life. I usually like to keep things light hearted in my relationships. My favourite color is blue (many of my friends have told me that they associate me with it bc my ig account is blue themed and i've had blue hair for almost 2 years now). I am really interested in the spiritual side of life.

My top kin is Ryo from devilman crybaby, and from haikyuu i kin Tendo and Oikawa

In a relationship I look for a partner that will keep things exciting between us and is able to make me laugh a lot.

(thank you in advance for this♡)

hi eva! thank you for requesting! ack i tried to dye my hair grayish blue, but i didn’t tone my hair or bleach it enough, so now it’s a really dark greenish color and i am suffering😐 anyways here’s your matchup!

generating matchup...

matchup: complete

i match you up with tendou!

what first drew him to you was how you shared a lot of the same traits as you did, so he was really excited that he found someone who is able to be as chaotic and spontaneous as he is. he immediately wanted to get to know you better. he wasn’t really phased that you first came off as intimidating, and you guys quickly became really close with each other.

tendou will ask you to dye his hair, and tell you to surprise him with any style or color that you think would look good. so far, he has had nearly every color of the rainbow, different clumps of hair dyed different colors, and that greyish blue you have so he could match with you. his favorite color so far was hot pink, and he has done it at least 3 times.

he loves to listen to you rant about whatever comes to mind, and he will be sure to chime in and agree or disagree with whatever you are saying. you guys have gotten into playful arguments about the stupidest things like if a frog worked at mcdonalds would they get paid the same amount as a human. you guys do get deep sometimes, but most of your conversations are on crack and it’s god tier comedy.

tendou will call you at like 3am and just bother you until you sneak out of your house, and for the rest of the morning you guys will just go insane, like mixing different energy drinks, climbing statues, and vandalizing cars (with washable chalk spray paint :)). tendou’s snapchat story is full of blurry pics and videos of you guys doing this shit, and at this point, people are so used to it that they don’t even question what you and tendou are doing.

he thinks your eyes are really pretty, and he will never stop telling you just how beautiful they are. he has experienced people calling him mean names in his childhood as well, so he just wants you to know that everyone who was mean to you was full of shit and they were all lying through their teeth.

tendou loves when you surprise him by going to his games. he definitely plays better when you are watching him, and whenever he successuflly shuts down a block, he will scream “DID YOU SEE THAT EVA!” and point at you. after the game, he will show you his teammates, and he will keep on talking about how lucky he is to have you, and you are his good luck charm.

one of your first dates with him was at a boardwalk amusement park, where you guys just went crazy and went on all of the highest, scariest rides with like no breaks in between, and it was just one adrenaline rush after another. after you guys finished every ride you wanted to go on, you and tendou got some ice cream and walked down the shore to calm both of your nerves down, and tendou chases the seagulls while you laughed and took videos.

every few weeks, you guys have late night karaoke sessions in the comfort of your room, and you and tendou just sing (pretty badly) all those loud, fork in a blender type beat kinds of songs (money machine, NEVER MET!, molly, etc.) while jumping on the bed and just enjoying each others company.

he loves to give you his hoodie, or let you wear one of his jerseys because it shows everyone that you are with him, and you aren’t afraid to tell people that you are his s/o. since most people didn’t want anything to do with him when he was younger, you not being ashamed to say that you are his s/o makes him feel much more accepted and happy with himself.

overall, you guys are such a chaotic couple, and whenever you guys are together, it’s just a constant loop of “what crazy shit will we do next”, and it’s honestly the best thing ever. you guys care about each other very much, and tendou just wants you to know how beautiful and funny you are, so he will tell you at every chance he gets.

i hope you enjoyed! i’m trying out this sort of new layout, and i think it’s nice so imma do this from now on :)

#haikyuu #tendou satori #tendou #haikyuu matchups #haikyu #haikyuu!!#haikyuu headcanons #haikyuu imagines #tendou imagines #tendou headcanons #tendou x you #haikyu headcanons #haikyu imagines

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girlfromthepast · 3 years

Text

Hey future me,

Today is April 9, 2021 - 12:18AM and I am in my room, it’s kinda raining, listening to a Taylor Swift playlist and is honestly in the verge of crying. I really hope that your dumbass will not forget the password for this account and that you’ll eventually read this again in the near future.

Four months. Four horrendous months and everything that I have been through the past months felt something that would definitely kill me instantly. My mind is so clouded every time that I would try to write a journal or entry how’s my life been doing. There are so many things that I want to forget but I somehow also don’t want to forget them because I want you to realize that no matter what shit was thrown to me now you made it. You have been so brave that even if you want to give up, you didn’t.

I wanna say that I am so, so, so proud of you. No matter what or who person you have become I know that you worked hard for that and I know that you will use it for the betterment of everyone. I hope that you are fine in all aspects because right now as I am typing these words, I am crying so much because I don’t know what future holds and I will entrust everything to you. I am so tired. I want to give up so much. My heart hurts every time I remember memories I really want to bury 12 feet under ground.

January 18, 2021 - around 7pm was probably the night you don’t want to remember but I want you to look back and remember how everything started. I want you to know that matter how much it hurts, it’s a part of a very unfortunate event in your life. It was probably one of the days that I have thought that after all the overloading crammed school activities are done, I want to treat myself and even hang out but none of it is happening until the day that I am writing this right now. There are so many things that I want to note but it will probably be too long but I just want to let this out for a moment because I will definitely burst any moment and I may not even notice that.

Lately I have been crying so hard. I cannot sleep without crying. Every time that there is something that would remind me of how ruthless this times are to me just pierces right to my heart and soul. My mother has been and always will be my anchor no matter what other people will tell. The memory of my mother crying just hurts so fucking much. Lord, I know you probably don’t need me to shout or even silently whisper the words I have been longing to say. You know Lord that at the back of my heart, there is a silent scream asking you why? I am so sorry for doubting you from time to time but it just hurts but I know that trials will never last longer and questions will eventually be answered because you know what is the best thing that should be placed in the palm of our hands. I would only ask for your guidance Lord, no matter what circumstance we will be facing I hope you will never leave our side.

I was never the best person to begin with. I don’t know many people or even close as much as anyone else. I never really thought that moral support during hard times is really assuring. I hope you are surrounded right now by people you really trust and really cherishes you genuinely. I have probably cried for the people that I thought would hold me close and tight but has chosen to let go and be distant from me. It will always be the phrase that, “Ah I forgot. They also have their own lives and they must go on with it. While I’m here, stuck in a time loop of a nightmare that I can’t seem to wake up from.” I know that it’s selfish. It’s very silly but I hope and praying you are enjoying life now. You worked hard to achieve happiness okay? Not to burden more your heart. Let go of all the baggage that your poor heart is carrying because they will only fill the storage for more important ones.

Closest people whom I really thought would be there isn’t with me right now. My friends are really limited and I don’t even know where to stand. It’s like I’m walking on egg shells because I’m afraid. I am so afraid that if I would create a simple mistake it would be so much easy to drop me like a stray cat. I am so scared that they would eventually leave too because of our situation right now. It may be an inevitable situation and I know if this will happen, I hope that you were able to take it no? I am the most awkward person I it triple the hardness of how to socialize with people. I am lucky to have people checking on my sometimes and would actually want to hang out with me. I hope you have become independent right now because it is so hard to be attached and be reliant to people. I seriously don’t want them to think that I am such a needy person. I have never thought that I would reach this moment that I am so scared people would tell that I am over reacting and so much emotional.

How are you? I really hope you have gotten fat and is seeing a therapist. I hope that you are happy because that is something that I would also like you to experience. Do you have a boyfriend? Probably not. You are probably living with cats and dogs lying somewhere. Could you afford corgi now? That is something that you always wanted to have right?

Is there another term more suitable to describe a person aside from being strong? Ah, brave. You probably are that person. You have been so brave and I am so proud of that because you are not just simply strong. I am sobbing and even trying to smile to silence my cries from my two Aunts right in the next room. This will probably not be my last entry but this would be the first and I hope you will get to go through these letters and would laugh and still listen to Taylor Swift and you know probably cry since you definitely one crybaby. Breathe tefanie. Never forget your roots but let it grow into something beautiful

April 9, 2021

1:00AM

In my messy room

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wwwafflewrites · 4 years

Text

Of Daydreams and Realities

Chapter 3: KAZ 2Y5

You came to around dusk, the day succumbing to its dying sunset. The sky was dark. You were flat on your back, with grains of gravel and concrete woven into the fabric of your shirt.

Two feet from your face was a dumpster, with squatting grey legs and a wide green base, smelling of rotten produce. You used its side as leverage to stand, raising your eyebrows as blood rushed away from your head and your vision went dark. And after a moment of patience, you found your balance.

You meandered some. Based upon your rough deductions, you had landed smack in the middle of nowhere, next to a rickety gas station.

You peaked around the faded building and confirm your suspicions, eyeing the few cars littering the lot. And one just so happened to fit your fancy. "Woah, sweet car," you mumbled as you neared the vehicle, admiring it's subtle beauty. It was a 1967 Chevy Impala. The hood was sleek and glossy, the headlights were... oh.

KAZ 2Y5.

Oh.

You stared. This has to be a joke, denial immediately kicked in. You just continued to stare at the license plate. Your hands shook—and jeez, your anxiety just wouldn't chill already—so you steadied them on the hood of the car, leaning in as you processed it all.

Looks like we're in Kansas, Toto.

You heard the bell of the gas station's door sing and you booked it. Past the road was a forest of thick vegetation, and if you could just lose them in there…

They probably think I stole something.

You could hear them behind you. So you pumped your arms and pushed your limits. This was life or death. Nobody touched Dean's Baby. Especially not you.

You made it to the ditch, and just as you were about to throw yourself into the trees, your collar snapped back. You collapsed in a pile of coughs and heavy breathing as more arms pinned you from above. Dean was literally straddling your waist and Sam was pinning you to the wet grass.

Naturally, you began to cry. You were just overwhelmed, but it was humiliating. However, all you could think of was that nightmare you had had of them. Dying once was enough.

I'm going to die.

For a moment, everyone caught their breath, yours hitched as you cried silently.

The hunters shared looks. They're agreeing to kill you. "Wait," you gasp, "just wait, please, I'm sorry."

Sam tilts his head a bit, his expression unreadable. "Sorry for what?"

"F-fo-for-"

Dean snapped, "For what? And what's with the crybaby act?"

His anger only made you frantic, wiggling underneath him. "Please don't kill me," you sob, hiding your face with you hand and cowering. You're twenty-two years old, get a hold of yourself.

"Well, do you deserve to be killed?" Dean was straight to the point, pinning you harder as you squirmed in fear.

"I d-d-don't think so. I just woke up and saw you..."

"Then why run?" Sam asked.

"Because I know who you are," you say with tear-brimmed eyes, heaving the words, "And now I won't survive this. Not this time. And you-you-you two are not going to help. You'll just make it worse."

At your response, Sam frowned deeper, his expression crinkling in thought. "How about you come with us and explain it all, so we can talk."

You shake your head vigorously, cheeks pink from your breakdown. "Did you not hear me? You'll only make it worse!"

But they've apparently made a silent agreement, hoisting you up and dragging you to the car. Your feet dig into the concrete, trying to find ground, but your toes only skid. "Let go of me!" You scream like a banshee. It's your last and final strategy for escape. Play the victim. "Let go!"

They faltered, but then plowed ahead faster.

A worried but timid employee ran out of the gas station, and the brothers showed their fake badges to the kid, who only nodded in compliance with wide eyes and retreated.

"Don't believe it! They are not cops! It's a fake!" You shrieked, but there was no use.

You attempted to kick Dean where it hurt, but he completely blocked the move by shoving you into the back seat face first and slamming the door. You were forced to readjust in the awkward position, and by the time you had, the doors were locked and the brothers were both in the vehicle.

"If you kick the windows you're going in the trunk," Dean warned, but you weren't even thinking about it. You'd be dead before you lifted your feet.

Dead, dead, dead.

A new panic rose as you pictured all the ways you could painfully die. You could only imagine all the djinns, the witches, the wendigos, the kahn worms, and all other creatures that could easily overpower you. "I'm going to die," was all you could say, terrified. Your lungs heaved, and you planted your face in your palms. Just don't think about it… just forget it… just forget…

A hand landed on your shoulder and you looked up to Sam, who looked so young. "Just tell us what's going on so we can help you."

Angry and afraid, you lash out. "You kidnapped me, that's what. You're making it worse. And you can't help me."

"You'd be surprised by how often we hear that."

"No, I wouldn't. But this is something you can't help. And if you say 'try us' I will kick your windows out, believe me."

They share another look like they're telepathic. "Did you even have a ride? We were the only people at the station besides the kid."

You froze. You didn't even think about that. "...Yeah. Yeah, I had a ride. I was parked in the back… by the dumpster."

Dean nodded. "Right. By the dumpster we just threw seven vampire heads into? Got it."

Sam looked to his brother in exasperation. "Dean…"

"I know a lie when I hear one." Dean shrugged.

You must have rounded the corner right as they disposed of the decapitated heads and bodies. How convenient. "Oh."

"Yeah, oh. We almost thought you were a vamp too. So, now that we're on the same page, what was that all about?" Dean demanded.

"That was… I'm not a vampire."

"We know. But how did you get here? You don't have a ride, and we're literally in the middle of nowhere."

You pinch your lips for a minute. “You won’t understand.”

“Try u...uh... why not?” Dean said, smooth like crunchy peanut butter.

You glare, raising a hand in a pinching motion, “You are this close to losing a window.”

“Why not? I can guarantee we’ll understand,” Sam said.

“No. You can’t. You won’t.”

There was silence. The hidden try us was infuriating. But you didn’t care anymore. “I know you. I know your history, I know your eating habits, I know your family, your friends, your life. All of it. But you don’t know me.”

There’s a long pause.

“She’s right, Sam, I don’t understand.”

Sam just shakes his head at his brother and turns back to you. “How? Time travel? Alternate dimension?”

You sigh. “Yes? You guys are a TV show where I’m from. And yes, like that one time with Balthazar, but also... no.”

“Explain.”

“I don’t know how to.”

///

Night had crept along rather quickly, and you shifted yet again in your seat. “So have you found…” The bunker, you wanted to say, but you were too exhausted to explain. “Are we headed to a motel, then?”

Dean was the one to respond, as Sam is asleep. “Yeah.”

“Figures,” you mutter.

You end up stopping at The L8 Nite Inn, which, in your opinion, was the most horrendous name in existence.

They herded you about like a lost sheep, roughly pulling your shoulders this way and that. They directed you like you would disappear if they blinked.

In all honesty, you wished you could.

The hotel room was shabby but warm. The brown walls glowed from the soft, yellow lamplight and the curtains were drawn. Eventually, a cot was rolled in, to which you dumped your few salvaged items.

Nervously, you prepared for bed, avoiding all eye contact. These guys were the real deal. Hunters. They hunted demons and witches and ghosts. They had scars. You hadn't thought this through. You hadn't thought any of this through. The next time you woke up in an unfamiliar place, you would not explore. No exploring. You were grounded from exploring.

Huffing, you curled up on the cold sheets, shivering a little.

Looking up, you found the boys staring. Dean immediately reacted. "Woah, wait. There is no way you're sleeping on a cot," Dean says.

You paused. "You guys always take the beds."

They share a look. "Well, I just. You're a g—"

"Girl?"

"—guest." Dean finished. He paused. "Hey! No! I'm not se—hey, nuh uh. Get that out of your head." He let out a sigh before sending a sly smile your way. "What I mean is Sammy here is going to take the cot."

Sam took five full seconds to comprehend what Dean had just said. "What?"

You panicked. No arguments. No matter how good natured. No arguments, please no arguments. "Hey, no, no. I'm cool with a cot. Seriously. It's comfortable."

Dean watched you. "You sure?"

You nodded.

A bit later, the lights went out.

///

You tossed and turned.

If you fell asleep, you could very well wake up in Sherlock. And while you loved the show, you weren't quite ready to be observed by his eyes. You didn't want to hear what you already knew.

This had hardly begun and you had already broken. A raw nervousness had begun to inflate within your stomach—a bloated, unpleasant bubble of anxiety—and you were sure it was steadily growing.

To sleep or not to sleep.

If you sat up very quietly, perhaps the Winchesters would not notice. Maybe you could avoid sleep. Perhaps even escape. If you could escape, you may be able to break this loop.

All you had to do was rise ever-so-slowly without the bed creaking. You dared to sit up.

Creak.

You winced. First the door, now the bed.

You were completely still, listening. Nothing reacted… maybe they didn't notice. You pulled your legs over the side of the bed, biting your lip hard as it let out yet another squeak.

A glance to the Winchesters. Nothing.

You sighed, carefully standing. The door was to your right, just within reach. If you could just tiptoe—

"I wouldn't do that."

You spun around.

Dean was sitting up in his bed, eyeing you. You couldn't read any humor or anger or irritation, but you also weren't great at reading faces.

When you decided to sit back on your cot, he flopped back down. You fumbled with the covers, stalling. You decided that, as much as you would love to, you would not rest your head against the wall.

You couldn't face Sherlock yet. In past dreams, he'd been rather cryptic. But if these new dreams—if they even were dreams, they were so vivid you were convinced they were real—were anything to go by, you would be facing a fully-charged detective very near his flat. With your luck, you’d be stuck in Baker Street, 221B.

And even if you could avoid Sherlock, where would you be off to? An American in London, with no belongings or money to offer? You'd be snuffed out before a week had passed. No, your only hope would be Sherlock. And you really weren't ready for that yet.

"You're not going to get any sleep like that."

You rolled your eyes. Dean was sitting up again, stretching a little. Just sleep, you thought, leave me be. "I'm well aware, thank you."

His forehead wrinkled as his eyebrows were drawn up. "If you think you can outlast us, then you're very, very wrong. Do yourself a favor and get some shut eye. You'll appreciate it in the morning."

You shook your head gently. Not knowing what else to add, you replied, "I'm okay."

"...Right," Dean said. "And why won't you sleep?"

Your eyes drooped. You were too tired to have this conversation. "I don't want to face him right now."

Dean stiffened. "Who?" He looked... murderous. You could only assume he was picturing the worst. Why shouldn't he? He was a hunter. He expected it. When you met his stony gaze, you realized you'd definitely said the wrong thing.

You hesitated.

You would regret this. You really really would regret this. But the words fell out of your mouth, anyway.

"Who?" He repeated icily.

"Sherlock Holmes."

#superwholock #supernatural #sherlock x reader #sherlock holmes #sherlock #tenth doctor x reader #tenth doctor #10th doctor x reader #10th doctor #doctor who #x reader #dean x reader #reader #dean winchester #sam winchester #john watson #fanfiction #fanfic #@jay-bel

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waterparchive · 5 years

Text

Toxic Fandom, Public Heartbreak, And The Feedback Loop

Travis Riddle – October 29, 2019

Fandom by Waterparks is one of my favorite albums of the year, regardless of the fact that…I am friends with the band. There was not a single track that immediately stood out as my favorite like Take Her to the Moon and Peach on previous albums--but I think that's because everything on this one is so good, it's impossible to choose one. I Miss Sex/War Crimes/I Felt Younger would probably comprise my top 3, but every song is fantastic. And the album is on the shorter side but you truly don't feel that length, these songs all go through so many different movements--lyrically and musically--that every song is just dense as hell and it feels a lot longer than it is, while still not feeling overwhelming or messy at all. It flows great and hits some really interesting themes.

This write-up was initially sent to Awsten on the album’s release date, and I’ve edited it a little below for clarity/brevity, because I would not shut up about it.

1. Cherry Red - Starting the album off with that bark/yell is so tight. A year and a half ago in that parking lot going to get crawfish together I didn't really "get" this song, but after hearing the album several times it really clicked for me. I love how it acts as kind of a setup to the whole thing, getting the listener into your mindset and introducing one of the main themes of the album. I also like how it continues your color motifs; "blue and yellow let’s get together and be green" has now gone bad and turned to sour green, and it seems like cherry red is replacing yellow (red + yellow = orange hmmmmm). I also love how "You know I died for you" ties into the closing track, "I said I loved you to death so I must be dead."

2. WWHN - A really great choice for the first full song of the album to set the tone for the Fandom theme in contrast with Cherry Red setting up the emotional side of the lyrics. It's also a goddamn jam so it's great at hyping up right at the start hahah. I've probably told you everything about this already but I like what you're saying in this, and how it's something probably every single artist goes through in their career, but no one seems to say in a critical way (that I’m aware of). I'm sure this and other songs will make some fans upset because they're being called out but I like that, and it's some stuff that needs to be said.

3. Dream Boy - Lots of good stuff about fan expectations in this, dressed up in metaphors and really catchy pop to catch people off-guard. Love the phrase "Build-A-Boy, pick your pieces" and "Do you believe in love and is it because of me?" With people's weird way of crafting their whole lives and beliefs and desires on these celebrities that they don't know personally at all yet are so invested in.

4. Easy to Hate - I feel like this is the most straightforward and "simple" song thematically, but man it is so catchy. The sound effect that I'm sure is your voice in the opening before the verse is so damn cool. I like this first real hint of the colors turning to red. This is thematically pretty similar to other demos like ********* and Play and stuff so with how catchy and big this chorus is, it's easy to see why you chose this one to cover that topic. I'm also a sucker for someone doing the chorus in a song but stripped down like you do here. Those harmonies in the final chorus are also soooo good..........

5. High Definition - You're on some Imogen Heap-ass shit here and it's dope. I like this as a single choice since I feel like the emotional side of the album really hinges on this track--it's not a breakup album in the typical sense (aside from like Easy to Hate and Worst), but rather it's about the aftermath of the breakup and the emotional state surrounding that, the doubts and insecurities and vulnerabilities of losing trust in everybody due to one person’s actions, and this song is such a direct and succinct and sad encapsulation of that. Hate how this whole song makes me feel for my friend but it's also really pretty and good.

6. Telephone - This is some real Hellogoodbye-ass shit here with the ending of the chorus hahah. The juxtaposition between this and High Definition is interesting, basically both songs coming to the same conclusion--not committing to a relationship--but in totally opposite ways. With this one basically being "I won't tell you how I'm feeling, I'll just go write lyrics/sing voice memos/tweet." Is this about the damn pretty Target girl you tweeted about once? "Now I'm living on a target" and "all these aisles feel like miles" hmmmmMMM. This wasn't my favorite when I first heard it but it realllllly grew on me and now I love it. The chorus is so good and I love what you're doing with the music/harmonies in the background of it. Also the dumb shit after "I'll follow" always makes me laugh. Then the dichotomy between this/HD is emphasized in the closing Wedding Singer sample which I feel like represents the fandom; you’re going through this huge emotional turmoil, but we’re reaping the benefits by getting great songs out of it.

7. Group Chat - It works as a goofy little interlude but I also like what it says thematically (if I'm not just pulling this out of my ass anyway). On one hand it seems to me like a commentary on the inanity of some fan group chats, how in some of them they all act like they're best friends but really it's just a surface-level friendship. "My name's [whatever] and we're all friends! :D" and then also with the effect on your voice, seems to imply to me how mentally draining everyone in the fandom can sometimes be on you more so than Geoff and Otto.

8. Turbulent - I know some people just gotta have their metaphors and shit in their lyrics but I love how direct this song is. Just plainly stating things makes them feel so much more raw and real. I can't see how you could more powerfully convey the anger and hurt than with "I'd unfuck you if I could." Also the "sOoOoO" in the second chorus is still best part (also the barks). Also the pitched-down backup vocals are tight in this song, really gets you into the frantic, pissed off headspace.

9. NBA - I like the potential double meaning of the chorus in this one; everyone in LA looks like you cause I'm missing you and seeing you everywhere, but also it’s kind of insulting, like "everyone in LA looks like you, you're not special." But aside from that, another very pretty albeit sad song. The chorus with full instrumentation and harmonies really hits hard. I also like the 11:11 connection with tying breath in knots; you're always really great at bringing back recurring images and lines in your writing, it makes your discography feel really connected and like you're actually writing these things, it's not some producer in a studio writing lyrics for you. These songs all lead into each other; the songs on Fandom could not exist without what came before in DD and Entertainment. That evolution is always really interesting to see, how these different motifs recur and change their meaning over time. I assume the main metaphor of this might also be a callback to Crybaby with “chasing through dreams in bloom.”

10. IMHSBALIDWDA - Definitely one of my favorites, it's just so damn fun. And once again some cool vocal effect you have going on in the background, which I always love. The lyrics here are fun but also biting; I've been thinking of this as a commentary on how fans don't really care about an artist's well-being or life even if they try to act like they do, they just want new songs and good performances and new merch etc. etc. no matter what it means the artist is going through or how they feel when they sing these emotionally devastating songs. So the chorus to me is kinda like a self-care anthem in a way, setting aside all the negative stuff and admitting to yourself hey, at least I feel kind of better now; maybe not entirely better, but I'm getting there.

11. War Crimes - Another song with sad lyrics but musically it goes so damn hard, another favorite. "I'm forgetting how to hate myself" is one of my favorite lyrics on the album, as is "My death will be the fandom." I don't even totally know what to say about this song cause sooo much is going on and it's just crazy. "Let's go!" is also a favorite moment. And the "I saved my own life" calling back to Not Warriors is tight.

12. [Reboot] - Hey is "I need to sleep alone" a reference to Sleep Alone!!!!!?!???? I've already talked to you about this song a lot too so I don't have much new to say. The vocal effect on the bridge is dope. The breaths before verse 2 are maybe my favorite part, as well as what you do on "all on you" including holding out "you" into the chorus. And whatever's going on in the background at the end of that second chorus, I can't tell if it's vocals or instruments or what, but it sounds really cinematic and cool.

13. Worst - This new version is so cool, it has so much texture that the demo didn't. Vocals are also really pretty. The added bass and electronics really add a lot of rhythm and an interesting vibe to this; the bass is almost jazzy in a way? But then the electronics/percussion are almost like a dance beat but really stripped down? I dunno, it's such an odd combination, especially with the guitar just being acoustic. One of the most interesting songs on the album sonically despite being comparatively "simple" at first listen.

14. Zone Out - My least fave just because it's such a simple interlude, but what I like that it does is like...basically comments on the preceding songs I guess? It's like a question to the listener. At the beginning you've got Dream Boy setting up their expectations, then this comes at the very end and essentially asks them, "After hearing all of these angry heartbroken songs, am I still your dream boy? Do you still think love exists because of me even though I've gone through all this and don’t believe in it myself?" I like that it makes the listener confront their previous feelings and expectations before we dive into the finale.

15. IFYWWM - First off I absolutely love the effect you put on the vocals at the start of this, especially with how that effect abruptly cuts off; it's so weird and interesting and I never get tired of hearing it. The difference between the demo and this final version is amazing, I love this song. And "I said I loved you to death so I must be dead" is such a great one-two punch; it hits hard as a "fuck you!" line with being a way to say you don't love her anymore, but then you realize how sad it is that the effect has been this emotional death that pervades the entire album and eventually leads right back into Cherry Red. Which is also a depressing ending; it's so abrupt without any closure about anything talked about on the album, and the way that it circles back into the opener kind of implies to me that maybe there's a sense of circularity to everything, it's unending, the songs will always be fueled by heartbreak and the emotional trauma will never go away and dealing with it in the public eye of the fandom will always be overbearing.

http://www.travismriddle.com/blog/2019/10/29/toxic-fandom-public-heartbreak-and-the-feedback-loop

#travis riddle #fandom #waterparks #waterparks band

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chac-ozai · 5 years

Photo

A cut straight out of a ficlet I wrote for @ryu-no-joou about Modern AU Chac’s struggle with a falling out with his best friend Teldryn.

What the hell, why not post it?

Jealousy

“Chac Ozai went from being “Single” to “In a relationship””

Teldryn scrolled passed it in a hyperactive haze, the big heart symbol beside Chac's name link caught his attention, and he scrolled up. His heart dropped, what the fuck is this? For the first time in weeks Teldryn clicked on his best friend's FB page and was amazed at what he'd missed by unfollowing him a few months ago. There where dozens of pictures of him taken by someone else, a bright smile on his face; there was some of him posing on someone's old car, of Chac climbing a tree shirtless, of him asleep on someone's couch with a giant lizard resting on his bare chest.

“Who...the...fuck.” Teldryn started to sweat, something in his heart squeezing at the sight. He was jacked up tonight, it was no different than the rest of his days lately, but the next set of pictures sent Teldryn's mind spiraling downward. Chac was hugging on a man taller than him, he had well-defined muscles and a ashen-brown mohawk. His best friend looked enamored with this unnamed person, and a fire started in Teldryn's gut.

From one picture to the next Teldryn paced up and down his apartment, Junie following him dutifully. The guy had no facebook profile, and he looked WAY older than Chac; what the fuck?! When he scrolled passed a picture of Chac kissing the rough-looking guy he saw that both Sirius and Vorstag had “liked” the image, Vorstag had a comment below- “You both look happy! I'm glad you decided to get serious.”

…..”Serious”?? How did he not know about this guy? This blatant ripoff? In a fit, Teldryn scrolled through until he found Sirius on his contacts, messaging him a long block of text after taking a screenshot of Chac kissing the stranger.

He sent it as an attachment, and underneath- “Who the fuck is this guy? I find it dsisturbing that Chac would keep this infomartion for me, how long has this been going on? I ahv been busy and so that means everyone can just cut me out of the loop? Wha'ts his name? Where did they meet? Chac must be going mad for dating a man that old. What the fuck”

Teldryn was smoking a cigarette furiously in his bathroom by the time Sirius bothered texting him back, the guy on the other end was fucking pissed and it showed clearly through the tenor of his text. Sirius wanted to complain directly to his husband but they where both at their jobs, choosing to just screenshot the incoherent text and send it to his husband. Oh, he had something to say to Tel for this.

“If you had bothered to talk to Chac at any point in the past few months you'd have known he's dating a new man. Guess what he got done with crying over your dumb ass. He's happy for the first time since YOU chose the fuckin powder over your best mate. What the fuck do you have to say anyway, you don't love him and you damn well don't want to date him. I bet youre high right now. When you're sober you won't give a shit. Leave Chac alone.”

Teldryn suddenly felt like hitting his head against something, it was a rush of energy and painful emotions that struck him deep. He was going to destroy his fancy new phone but decided to attempt a coherent text back, threateningly.

“Give me his name. What's his fucking name.”

Sirius got nervous. Teldryn had been very unstable the last he saw him and he hated the idea of him getting involved in Chac's love life again. “Why, Teldryn? Planning on committing a murder? You jealous Chac isnt crying over you anymore?”

Teldryn never sent a text back. Sirius was irrationally worried and had projected these ideas to Vorstag, wanting to find a way to keep Chac safe. Neither of them knew the proper route to take, and for the married couple Teldryn had once again seemed to disappear from their lives. Months went by.

Chac was filled with an energy he hadn't known in a long time; music flowed from him at his live show like it had been once when he was inspired by love. He felt as if it was back to the way it was, his eyes bright and shining for the crowd of fans who had rejoiced the return of their local musician. Chac was offered a drink by a fan and he sipped at it, a high five going out to the fan who had long sought his return. These early summer months, warmth on the breeze and music in his heart, Chac was feeling perfect right where he was.

“I've been working on a song for a little while now, It's my first time trying it out but I want to dedicate it to someone very important to me in the audience somewhere. He doesn't know I've been working on this, but you know who you are and I guarantee every word in it's for you, babe.” Chac got comfortable on his stool and prepped his violin, tapping his foot on a variety of pedals until a long came to life. He scanned the crowd and saw Gage was sitting by himself with a worried smile on his face.

What was that boy planning? Porter thought to himself. Chac swayed as he began to play his violin, coming to life in a dramatic Orbison vibe.

“Walking, spend a lot of time walking

That's what people do, getting over you

Smiling, did you see me smiling?

The whole act's just for you

What else can I do?

People say I'm better off alone, So I'm trying, trying, trying

Oh please, if you see me cry

I apologize, I'm a little crazy, crazy crazy”

Gage had no idea what to do with himself, tears welled up in his eyes before he even had a chance to man up. He picked up his shirt and covered his nose and his mouth, eyes locked with Chac's. He knows they've had a rough patch, but the soul that Chac's voice projected towards him was too much to bear. Chac's singing mouth was smiling as he saw Gage crying like a baby in that corner, could see his big strong boyfriend reduced to a puddle by the sound of his voice.

“Please, if you change your mind

I won't change mine

So i'm trying trying trying

I'm on my knees, I'm on my knees!

I know you're over me

and it's driving me crazy, crazy, crazy”

These lyrics where meant for him. Every word Chac cried out was a direct message from his heart to the Dunmer's. Teldryn was sure of this as he watched from far away enough that the musician wouldn't see him.Was this what he was doing, calling out in a fit of passion to him week after week at these shows, and Teldryn hadn't been there to hear it? Not sober but coming down, Teldryn's mohawk cruised through the crowds of young people like a shark's fin as he flanked the stage. He was looking for a better view, but was pushed to the back as the song crescendos into nothingness, followed by a roar of applause.

“Thank you. That was a rough one.” Chac placed his violin down and opened his arms up, walking through the crowd and towards the lonely table where Gage sat wiping up his tears. Teldryn's hawk eyes locked on the sight of Chac going to hug the man he'd seen in the pictures and despised. The older man had his face buried into Chac's shoulder, both of their arms looped around each other and hugging tightly. For the first time, Gage wasn't ashamed of the public display; he was however..ashamed of everything else.

“I'm sorry, baby.” Gage choked out, his voice ragged.

“I forgive you. Love you.” Chac kissed his right eyelid and left for the stage again, his heart feeling renewed.

Teldryn could have killed the man with his glare. From a dozen paces back and over a sea of shorter folk, Teldryn glowered at the man Chac claimed to be in a relationship with. Charlatan! He receded into the depths and got another drink to calm his nerves, listening to Chac fall back on the old songs he used to listen to every weekend night in the past.

People recognized him there, and that was obviously so- Teldryn was at almost every single show Chac performed in the past years, only recently having given up his place as his helper. He thought about the lyrics Chac sang out, begging for a change of heart..that he wasn't over him. Fuck that being about what's-his-face over there, that big crybaby. Teldryn's heart shook in his chest at the memories of these concerts, how Chac had promised Teldryn once upon a time that every love song had Teldryn at it's center.

The concert was over before Teldryn could decide what to do with himself; he was a few drinks in and had just enough chutzpah to make his entrance; yes. He came here for a reason and that was to see Chac, screw the other guy being there. Chac made his grand exit speech and was folding up his equipment with the help of Gage when Teldryn fixed his lapels and strode up to the scene.

“Just when I thought I'd never see you again,” Teldryn spoke, his voice proud and so unique. “Fabulous performance, Chac. As always.”

Both men turned from their work to look at the tall Dunmer, Chac's every feature went stark with shock-

“Teldryn! Holy shit, since when have you been back?!” Chac felt awkward but opened his arms for the hug that Teldryn went for, stunning red eyes casting a quick glare at the older man beside them.

“Not long, not long.” Teldryn sighed, holding onto that hug long enough to raise an eyebrow. “Couldn't come back home and not say hi!”

Chac pulled away and looked to Gage immediately, who wasn't smiling but looking at the very gay-looking Dunmer with a mysterious expression. “So, uh, Teldryn. This is my ...friend, PG.” He stammers, opening a palm towards Gage.

Obviously, Gage wasn't going to touch him. He did a nod, his features dark. “Feel like I've seen'ya around.” Gage comments, Teldryn chilled to think that Chac was dating a southern guy.

“..Uh, Teldryn is featured in a lot of the advertisements around Times Square..maybe that's it.”

“Come now, Chac. Don't introduce me like that. How do you do,” Teldryn extended his hand, glaring at Gage- “Chac and I go miles back. He's my best friend.”

“Huh.” Gage reached out and practically crushed Tel's hand in his own “Best friend? Strange, I haven't heard of you at all since the time I've been dating Chac.”

“...dating?” Teldryn feigned surprise, he slapped Chac on the back and the musician was utterly red-faced. “Well there's a twist and a half! Why don't I buy you two a drink and maybe we can do a spot of catching up?”

Chac was so torn, he hadn't seen Teldryn in person for so long he'd forgotten how he looked, how the very air that clung around him seemed to just be so taken by his presence. Gage had noticed it too, he was glowering at the thought of this dandy stranger wanting to reconnect with Chac. What was going on here?

Chac was going to say no. He should have, but by god when Teldryn looked at him with a smile that could warm hell over, he couldn't help but say yes. “Yeah, I'd like that. PG, how about you? Do you mind?”

Hell yeah, he minded. Porter had a killer headache kicking in from all the tears he'd shed before, but now he had to sit around and keep Chac happy while he caught up with this supermodel?”

The three of them sat down, Chac in the middle with his drink. Porter immediately went to scan his phone, he wasn't looking at anything in particular but he'd be damned if he wasn't listening to every little thing the two of them shared. Chac held Gage's hand, but everything else was affixed to Teldryn as he told a grand story about Hollywood.

“-and then I opened the door to the set medic and saw him trying to fish the shoe out of his ass before the director came back from break.”

“PPFTTT HAHAHA!” Chac howled, hard enough to spill his damn drink on his knee. Teldryn seemed so kind to offer him a napkin before Gage could reach them, Chac reaching up and wiping a tiny tear away from his eye. Teldryn was making him laugh nonstop, maybe it was the anxiety of finally seeing Tel again or just forgetting how fucking hilarious he always was, but he could not get himself to stop giggling. Long minutes went by before the bar was closing up, and Teldryn had exactly what he wanted.

“Well it was bloody grand to see you again, I'm home for good so if you're in the area...”

“Yeah, Tel. That sounds good. Maybe we can chill with Sirius and Vorstag again, get the whole gang together.”

“Whatever you want.” Tel went in and did it, he gave Chac a kiss on the cheek before heading off, Gage staring daggers at the beautiful Dunmer as he left the bar. They still had more packing to do and Porter was simply floored by what just happened; Chac was never like that until tonight. A giggling, soppy mess.

“Known each other long, I take it.”

“uh..Yeah, 7 years. He's been in and out of the friend group as of late, last I heard of him he was doing commercials in Hollywood.”

“Yup, heard that. He mentioned it maybe 5 times. You guys ever...ya know, date?”

Chac could immediately see where Gage was coming from after that comment. Shit, was he really that giddy around Teldryn?

“No! No, he's straight. I think he's dating a Nigerian model right now.”

“Hell, He coulda fooled me.” Gage didn't feel his heart hurt any less by the statement, but he kept it down.

“Yeah, people say that. He's just uh, very British...um, enough about him, eh? Let's get back home and get to sleep.”

“Uh huh. You're the boss.” Gage said flatly. He had some digging to do tonight, even if it meant making a dumb FB profile to do it.

#my gay art #Porter Gage #Chac Ozai #Chacozai #modern AU #FO4 #Teldryn Sero #fanfic

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