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#hands down my favourite album this year and truly truly did so much for me seriously
taegularities · 8 months
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i wish i had the words to explain what yoongi and his d-day did for my mental health this year. i really wish i had the power to somehow let him know that i related to every word he said in that album and everything he spoke about in his documentary, and that his wisdom and reassurances really pushed me forward like nothing else all these months. ugh i wish.
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sanstropfremir · 10 days
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best choreos of 2023!
not gonna lie, this year was a rough one for choreos. like with the actual music itself, this year was profoundly complacent and very few choreographies were truly inspired and willing to do something original. i was actually afraid for a bit that i was not even gonna be able to fill out a top ten list, much less having any runners' up. so here's a list of runners' up:
new dayz - trendz
spotlight - yunho
wormhole - n.ssign
neverland - nine.i
baggy jeans - nct u
koong - xikers
vuja de - yunho
bouncy - ateez
journey - woodz
and my favourites:
circle - onew
youtube
i have a bit of a love hate relationship with the circle choreo bc on one hand i LOVE it, the imagery and idea is beautiful i think it's one of the few choreos this year that actually embodies what the song and the cb were trying to say. but on the other hand, as a contemporary dance enjoyer it is.........let down by the fact that kpop is a predominantly hiphop based genre and the backup dancers are not up to snuff for this type of choreo. kaspar did a pretty good job choreographing it but hiphop and contemp/modern are notoriously hard styles to slide between for dancers, and i really think they should have actually got a modern choreographer and a modern troupe. it would have significantly upped the quality and given the stages that extra gut punch.
grl gvng - xg
youtube
honestly you really could sub in any xg choreo from this year here bc they were all stellar, but the commitment of grl gvng clinched it for me. the costuming, the makeup, the style of movement all tell such a clear story that i would have included it on my list regardless of what the album was, but the transition from hesonoo to xgene to grl gvng is fucking UNREAL. it's so refreshing to see a gg actually commit to a concept that isn't pretty bubbly straightness and to not compromise on it regardless of how much people bitch, right down to the choreo. there's something immensely satisfying about seeing a choreo about how these girls are alien cyborgs and have it actually LOOK like they are alien cyborgs, the intentional clunkiness and 'offputting' movements and all. i've been begging for an actual real concept like this for years and finally. finally it has been delivered.
chrome arts - onlyoneof
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its not a choreo list by me if there isn't an ooo one, and once again they came right out of the gate at the beginning of the year with something batshit insane. the knee walk move is crazy. i love it 10/10.
killer - key
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unlike a lot of the other entries on this list, i don't think killer has as concise of a concept other than "the 80s", but the great thing about it is that you absolutely can successfully pull off a more abstract concept if you do it well. this is such a strong choreo with good images and composition, plus a lot of 80s references in the moves themselves, and sometimes that's all you need if you put the right care into it. this is actually one of the few choreos that i've seen that correctly capture the feel of an mj choreo from the 80s, which seems to be a real challenge for a lot of idols. i will say that i think it would have made more sense to me if this had been a repack to bad love, bc it has the same vein of nostalgia vibes and a very similar feel in the shapes of the choreo, but really they're all part of his retro series so it's not a substantive complaint.
the rizzness - taemin
youtube
don't speak to me don't look at me i'm literally never recovering from this in my entire life. i cannot fucking believe he made me say with full conviction that ""the rizzness"" is one of the best taemin bsides but also of fucking course he did. this is black rose but eviler (complimentary). it's so interesting to see how versatile taemin's style is and where his true strengths lie. obviously his title track choreos are perfectly tailored to his body and his abilities and they are all unreal choreos on their own. but there's something about the way that he carries himself when he does more hiphop based choreo that has such a natural power to it. it's so clear that this is the style that he started learning dance in and especially now that he's become much more settled in his body since he got back from the military, it's so obvious how much love he has for this song and this way of movement that i don't think any of his title tracks will stack up in the same to it in my eyes.
don't call me - dkz nine to six
youtube
insane. insane insane insane. i love everything about this. it's weird its creative it had very clear imagery that supports the song, it says fuck capitalism, what more could you possibly want. honestly one of the best choreos of the last couple years. i'm also gonna include nod here too bc it was the bside they promoted and it has crazy choreo also, and highly recommend ppl listen to digital love, the other bside. very strong release from dkz this year despite all the shit they went through.
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here's hoping 2024 is better!
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CONCERT REVIEW: ALANIS MORISSETTE W/ GARBAGE AT ROGERS ARENA - JULY 31ST, 2022
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Few Canadian solo artists have had the impact and influence Alanis Morissette does. Performing from a very young age, she released Jagged Little Pill when she was only 21. It won multiple Grammys including Album of the Year, has sold over 30 million copies, and influenced many subsequent artists. It is generally acclaimed as one of the greatest international debuts ever – and it’s no surprise a tour celebrating its 25th anniversary was just as amazing.
Opening the show were alt 90s rockers Garbage. Formed and based in the US with Scottish singer Shirley Manson, this band shares status with Alanis in being huge icons of their era. They played in front of a giant backdrop of two stone angels, with strobe lights, flashing colours, and energy just as, if not more intense than many newer bands I’ve seen. 
Garbage played for almost a full hour, with stage presence that really brought the house down. In the early evening just after 7pm as they came on, most of the audience was sitting. But a few songs in, almost everyone was standing, dancing, and pumped. You could really feel the mood in the room as the crowd began to warm up and rock out. 
They circled through 12 songs, including their most recognizable hits “Stupid Girl” and “Only Happy When It Rains.” Shirley commanded the stage in a sparkling, dazzling black onesie. She ran around lots, shaking back and forth as only a seasoned cool rock star can do. She interacted with the audience a lot – in fact much more than Alanis ever did. She told a story about how, on tour in Edmonton, Alanis left the band an unexpected gift in the dressing room – a broom. “This is where gender divides us, because all the men in the audience are confused, and all the women are saying hell yeah, a broom!”
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She wished Vancouver a very happy Pride (as our festivities were happening that weekend), asserting that Garbage would always be allies to the LGBTQ – which received massive applause. She referred to today’s “weird conservatism” and gave a passionate and fiery speech about women’s rights and bodily autonomy relating to abortion, complete with curse words, emphasizing “my body, my choice.” Dedicating a song to the young women in the audience, it was clear Garbage is just as cool and compassionate as ever.
Garbage really got everyone excited for the main event. Just 25 minutes or so later around 8:30 the lights dimmed. It started with a video retrospective detailing Alanis’ life and career over the years. Snippets of interviews, movies, and parodies of her music throughout the 90s were shown. It was a reminder of her past and current impact, with some truly hilarious sketches laughing at herself. She came on stage alongside her full band and immediately launched into the upbeat, empowering anthem “All I Really Want.” 
This tour was featuring Jagged Little Pill played in its entirety. I wasn’t sure if she would be performing the album in order or mixing the setlist up. I wasn’t even sure if she would be playing any songs off her other records. In the end, she performed the thirteen tracks out of order and played between five to ten other songs. Some of these were just snippets/transitions between more familiar tracks, and the focus was definitely on JLP. As a longtime fan very familiar with the album and her other eras, I thought this was a great decision. It ensured a better mix between faster and slower songs, saving some of the best for last while diversifying the whole set. 
Jagged Little Pill is an album that’s honest, heartfelt, and empowering. It’s sarcastic and sad, yet also encouraging and optimistic. The lyrics are poetic yet catchy and personal yet universal. So many of the choruses and even verses had us all singing along. “Hand in My Pocket” had us going on about being poor but happy. “Head Over Feet,” a personal favourite of mine, had me almost in tears humming along about not being surprised if someone loves you for all that you are. There was the classic hit “Ironic” that had everyone chanting about rain on your wedding day. (Isn’t it ironic, don’t you think?) And of course, she closed the main set with her most heated and arguably recognizable hit – one of the most angsty and exciting breakup songs of all time. In that moment, we were ALL here to remind you of the mess you left when you went away. (You, you, you oughta know.)
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What struck me most about the performance was just how youthful and similar to the studio recordings Alanis sounded. She’s been in the industry for three decades, consistently touring and recording. She’s had three children and gone from being barely out of her teens to middle-aged. Nevertheless, with the notes and pitch hit, you’d swear she hadn’t aged a day. Her music is both pop and alt-rock and involves lots of screaming, stretching, and wailing. I think it really speaks to her talent and stamina that the live sound is so clear and present.
In addition to the music, a striking feature of the show was the imagery. Almost every song had an interesting visual accompaniment. Videos of dancing teens, scheming men, and fiery flames amongst others backdropped Alanis at fifty feet tall. There were psychedelic and cosmic backgrounds, dishes being broken, peace signs for “Hand in My Pocket,” and stained glass church windows for “Forgiven.” (You know how us Catholic girls can be...)
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The non-JLP tracks were a solid mix of her later years. A standout was one of her latest singles, “Reasons I Drink” – a rather funny yet emotional and probably all-too-relatable tune. I wasn’t sure if the set would be intimate and solo or upbeat and detailed. In the end it was the latter; not once did Alanis perform solo or on the piano. This never took away from the experience, and she still played the harmonica and guitar at times. 
The encore was beautiful, touching and emotional. She began with “Your House” – a hidden track on the original album – and comedically restarted the song three or four times to a different tempo and musical style. (“No, that’s not it…”) Alanis circled through her 1998 track “Uninvited,” which included a few candid family photos of her, her husband, and three young children, to lots of applause. Finally, we finished with the cheerful and sweet hit “Thank U.” This was accompanied by the stage backdrop showing dozens of tweets from fans with the hashtag #ThankYouJLP25. These tweets had messages stating what these people were thankful for—everything from comic books and live music to family, friends, and life itself. It was touching and personal, and a great way to include fans from around the world. 
Rogers Arena holds over 18,000 people, and the show was sold out. I think it’s amazing that two women who peaked in the 90s can not only sell out an arena in 2022, but rock a crowd of all ages delivering the highest quality show possible. Being in that arena was like stepping back in time, reliving and experiencing glory days with the young and old. This was my first arena concert since 2019 in what was a different world, as I’m sure it was for many in the audience. It’s really great to be back sharing and experiencing live music again. I couldn’t have asked for a better return to large shows. 
Written by: Cazzy Lewchuk
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tameila · 2 years
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May Week One Albums.
May 2nd: My Name is Michael Holbrook, MIKA
favorite(s) before listen: Tomorrow
favorite(s) after listen: Tomorrow, Tiny Love, Ready to Call This Love, Tiny Love Reprise
May 3rd: Favourite Worst Nightmare, Arctic Monkeys
familiarity: went into the day with no album prepared and this was a recommended one on the front page. Between Heardle and the restaurant in Chicago that I ate at over the weekend with my friend, it felt that Arctic Monkeys had been cropping up and saying it was their turn!
favorite(s) before listen: Fluorescent Adolescent, Do Me a Favour, 505
favorite(s) after listen: Fluorescent Adolescent, Do Me a Favour, 505, D is for Dangerous, Brainstorm, This House is a Circus, The Bad Thing, Old Yellow Bricks
standout lyric: "perhaps ‘fuck off’ might be too kind”
May 4th: Toxicity, System of a Down
familiarity: recommended by @jabletown​ ! as a person who consumed AMVs during my middle school years, uh...yeah, I know System of a Down lol
favorite(s) before listen: Chop Suey!, Shimmy, Toxicity
favorite(s) after listen: Chop Suey!, Shimmy, Toxicity, Prison Song, Bounce, Aerials, Arto
May 5th: Hypnotize, System of a Down
familiarity: Hypnotize is my favorite System of a Down song, so I had to throw this album in too
favorite(s) before listen: Hypnotize
favorite(s) after listen: Hypnotize, Dreaming, Kill Rock n’ Roll, Stealing Society, Tentative
May 6th: Tell All Your Friends, Taking Back Sunday
familiarity: it’s the start of my birthday weekend! I’ve been excited to return to Taking Back Sunday’s albums ever since I started this project but kept holding them off, but my birthday? it’s the perfect time! I have always felt like TBS doesn’t get nearly enough attention and love. they’ve always been one of my favorites from their heyday of music. I’m most familiar with their first three albums and then their sixth, but they’ve released an album as recent as a couple years ago so I’m interested to see how they’ve changed over the years
favorite(s) before listen: I would say that the only song on this album that I’m not overly familiar with is “The Blue Channel”
favorite(s) after listen: This album is a classic but I was amazed that I found myself not getting into it that much. It’s definitely still a nostalgia listen and I enjoy each song, but my top favorites are You’re So Last Summer (this song is truly top tier), Ghost Man on Third, Cute Without the ‘E’, There’s No ‘I’ in Team, and Timberwolves At New Jersey
standout lyric: i mean...come on, the most iconic lyric has to win...”The truth is you could slit my throat / And with my one last gasping breath / I'd apologize for bleeding on your shirt” this lyric fundamentally changed me as a person when i first heard it
May 7th: Where You Want To Be, Taking Back Sunday
familiarity: I relistened to some of my favorites off this album a few months back and -- my god, the way I probably, legitimately hadn’t listened to those songs in a decade and yet the lyrics came to me like I’d listened to yesterday. Out of their first three albums, I slept on this one quite a bit. I had my favorites and I’d ignore the rest of it, which is why I’m particularly excited to do a full listen through since I discovered new favorites when I did that with Louder Now last year
favorite(s) before listen: Set Phasers To Stun, A Decade Under the Influence, This Photograph is Proof (I Know You Know), One-Eighty By Summer, Number Five With a Bullet, Little Devotional, ...Slowdance On The Inside
favorite(s) after listen: Happy to report back that this is a no skip album! I wouldn’t say that any of the songs that I hadn’t listened to before Wow!’d me, but it was nice to experience the album as a cohesive whole
standout lyric: “Well, my best side was your worst invention”
May 8th: Louder Now, Taking Back Sunday
familiarity: hands down my favorite of their albums! I did a full listen through of this album last year and ended up falling absolutely in love with “My Blue Heaven” to the point of anger at my younger self for slighting it -- to the point of taking up this project to, in part, explore older albums with great songs that I may have slept on.
favorite(s): No skips! No skips! An amazing album from start to finish. As started, My Blue Heaven has become one of my favorite TBS songs, but Miami and MakeDamnSure are also high on the list. Miami is one of those songs that just makes me want to stand in the middle of the street in my suburban neighborhood at midnight and scream iykyk. and MakeDamnSure is not technically a queer song...but it’s a queer song.
standout lyric: "I'm just asking you to hear me / Could you please, just once, just hear me?”
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hoonhrt · 3 years
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MUSIC SHOP 
: pairing — idol! heeseung x music store worker! reader 
: genre — fluff 
: album recc. — case study 01 by daniel caesar and any of the albums i mentioned throughout the story! 
: a/n — this is a little more on the lengthier side so please know that before reading! (i couldn’t help myself i luv hee too much) 
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it was a slow day at the shop. the dim fairy lights hung around lowly, making the atmosphere feel even slower. you walked around the store pushing a small grey cart that held all the albums, records, and cassette tapes one could ever imagine of, placing everything in their correct spots for future consumers to find. 
the sound of a faint bell was heard from the back of the store. where you were, indicating that someone had came in. you flatten out the front of your sweater and rush to greet the costumer. you are met with a tall man dressed in all black from head to toe, water droplets fell off the shoulder of his jacket and you make a mental note to mop the floor later. 
“hello! welcome to moonshines music. please let me know if you need help with anything, i’ll be happy to assist!” you cheerfully exclaim. you welcome costumers with a joyful energy that even cheers them up, it was your thing. the costumer pulled down the black mask from his face and waited for you to react. he was a slightly astonished when a reaction never came. no gasps, no eyes widening, no realization of who he was. just you with a firm smile on your face waiting for him to walk away and start shopping. he eyes you for a little before nodding his head and makes his way to the direction of the CD albums.
he pondered this feeling for a little. he wasn’t used to not being recognized. i mean, everyone knows him. he was on ever magazine cover and topped all the charts with his music. his face was plastered on every product poster that covered the walls of the busy city. so how could you not? he thinks that maybe you didn’t want to scare him off or bother him with pictures and autographs,  inflating his ego a little bit. but still, why did you not say anything? 
“excuse me! do you mind helping me out?” you could hear his voice from across the store as he shouted for you. jogging from your previous to his still figure. 
“how can i help you?” continuing on your energetic personality. he didn’t have a real reason to ask for help, he was just too intrigued by you and needed a reason to converse with you. he looks around the store frantically for a minuet before looking back behind him to the CD’s he initially walked towards. “can you choose an album for me?” he blurts in your face loudly. 
this wasn’t the first time someone asked for music recommendations but he walked in with confidence so you assumed he was a man who knew his music. “uhh yes um— do you perhaps have favourite genre that you maybe like?” you question him. he just stares at you, his lips folded in with a blank expression on his face. he shakes his head no. you politely nod again, now even more conflicted with what to recommend. you trail your eyes around the store till you see through the window next to the door. the sky is crying, whilst gray clouds surround it. the streetlight emitting an orange hue that reflect the fallen rain drops on the glass and you suddenly remember the small drops of water that trickled down his jacket sleeve when he first entered the store. 
walking behind him you scan for the letter D section and begin to search for the album. letting out a soft ‘hmm’ before pulling out the album and handing it to him. “Case Study 01 by Daniel Caesar. perfect for rainy days when you aren’t lost in your thoughts.” you end with a smile on your face. ‘so they really have no idea to who I am, huh’ he thinks to himself. he looks down at the album in his hands than looking back up at you. a gentle smile reaching his lips. he follows you to the cashier register and pushes the album towards you. “that’ll be $10.15! card or cash?” he whips out his wallet and takes out a credit card. you can’t help but notice it was a black card, a card only the richest of people have. you wonder how this man can be so rich and why he is buying from a tiny music store in the middle of a unknown area. 
you’re pulled away from your thoughts when the sound of the machine goes off,  indicating the purchase has gone through. you delicately place the album into a tiny bag and hand it over to him with glee. “enjoy the album sir! if you ever do comeback, let me know what you thought about it!” you say in a courteous manner. the young man now looks at you with a toothy grin on display for you to awe at. he nods in affirmation before exiting. the atmosphere becoming quiet again. you hoped to see that man again. 
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another week has rolled around. you hum under your breath a silly little tune from a song on one of your many playlists, sending another customer off a new record they seemed to be extremely excited about. your job wasn’t much but seeing people share the same love for music as you was something that never failed to make you love life. wiping down the cashier, you hear the door chime and see the same handsome man from last week. you catch a glimpse of the clear sky and the natural light of the sun from out the door as he enters. 
“i LOVED that album! you described it literally perfectly, it fit the vibes of the weather sooo much but didn’t leave me agonizing about life like how the rain usually makes me feel.” it made you so happy and almost accomplished to have someone come back and praise you for your music choice. you were about to start telling him it was no big deal before he proposes, again, to choose another album for him. you look at him a little unsure, you honestly didn’t know what to give him this time and you were scared he wouldn’t like it this time. he can see the anxiety flush over your face but lets you know he is looking for something this time. “give me your childhood favourite album. like, you know every single lyric for every song on this album.” your eyes go wide as you practically jump towards the shelf. he giggles quietly, thinking how cute you looked. 
you prance towards the shelf knowing exactly where it was. in your hands was the Up All Night by One Direction, you shove the album into his hands with a passionate smile. he looks at you and tries to hide his judgment from you, which doesn’t work as you can see his eyebrow arch up and study the album in slight disgust. “hey! i danced to this album every night before i went to sleep for 3 years as a kid okay? it’s my favourite album!” your bottom lip pushes out, gazing at him with eyes the resemble a cute puppy. he throws his head back lets out a laugh that you think you could listen to for hours on end. 
just as the prior week, he passes you the album to scan through and pulls out his card to pay. he was about to make his way out before you stop him. “can I have your name?” you requested. you took a liking to the kind guy, he had a pretty face and laugh that you particularly enjoyed. he checks his phone and swiftly swipes through the millions of notifications he has, then gazing back up at you. a genuine look plastered on your face. a look that feigned innocence, kept promises, and truly enjoyed life for what it was. “heeseung. my name is heeseung.” 
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you tug the key out of the door lock with a little force. the moon created a source of light and comfort as you made your way away from the shop and towards the subway station. you worked longer than usual and fatigue was the only thing felt within your weak bones. a car pulled up next to you, the window rolled down and revealed the person that has been occupying your thoughts recently, heeseung. 
“on your way home?” you nod. “hop in, i’ll drive you home, we can listen to some music while we’re at it.” now you usually don’t just get into random peoples car, but you trusted him. who else would listen One Direction because someone asked them to? 
his car was black from top to bottom, mirroring his outfits that he always wore. the windows were tinted and it looked intimidating from the outside, but on the inside sat a doe-eyed boy with the prettiest smile to exist. heeseung’s hand reaches out to turn up the volume of the car sound system. the sound of Frank Ocean’s voice fills up the empty sound within his car. it was song you were unfamiliar with. you ask what song this was and he lets out a dramatic gasp, almost looking offended. “you DON’T know this song? I guess pretty people can have flaws huh,” he turns his head to watch you flush a pink shade that can still be seen despite the darkness. a sight he thinks is quiet lovable. 
the car ride to your home lasted much shorter than you wished it did. you two talked about everything under the moon. favourite songs, old childhood friends, past lovers. heeseung enjoyed the fact that you didn’t know his career identity. to the world he was Lee Heeseung, world renowned singer and model, but to you he was just, heeseung. a young boy who loved music and loved the world involved around it. you made him feel like a regular person again. 
as you open the car door to make way into the glass doors of your apartment complex, heeseung grabs your wrist and pulls you back into the car. “how about... i lend you my favourite album this time, and next week on—” he checks the schedule his manager sent him, “saturday at 6 pm, i pick you up and we can talk more about it hm?” he holds his phone towards you with a cheeky smile on his face. you shake your head in disbelief as you bit back a smile of your own that is creeping on to your face. “I’ll see you then, hee.” your heart skipping beats as you walk away from the running vehicle. 
unbeknownst to you, an excited heeseung punches the air rapidly with excitement. he silently screams into the night like a kid. feeling as if he was on cloud 9 to have scored a date with someone who’s a) the most beautiful person he’s ever seen and b) someone who likes him for his truest self. 
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cafedanslanuit · 3 years
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chapter guide | prev. chapter | next chapter | extra content
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✖   —   chapter summary: after receiving a text from zeke, you go out to meet him, leaving porco behind. your head is full of questions and you're not quite sure how you're going to confront him about last night's events.
✖   —   pairing: porco/reader & zeke/reader
✖   —   chapter tags/warnings: college au, protected sex, zeke calls you a good girl, mentions and/or descriptions of parental emotional abuse/traumatic childhood, hurt/comfort, fluff, referenced cheating. 
✖   —   a/n: beta read by my friend @ofoceansandtombstones​ <3 the title of the chapter is a reference to “oh daddy” by fleetwood mac.
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chapter two: oh daddy
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The only sounds you could hear when you got to the tennis court Zeke asked you to meet at was the ball being hit with the rackets and grunts from the two blond men you were expecting to see. Even if Reiner was a part of the swimming team along with Zeke, he always indulged his friend into playing with him, especially in the early mornings.
Neither Zeke nor Reiner realized you were there, too focused on the game, so you walked to the bleachers and sat down, forearms resting on your knees and hunched back as you watched the game.
Reiner was one of your only friends that liked being around Zeke, which really baffled your mind as the only one who knew about your dirty laundry was Porco. Yet, even after two years of being together, Annie wouldn’t even try to start a conversation with Zeke the multiple times he was over at your place. Armin, being the sweetheart he was, tagged along with her, only saying hello or goodbye while making a beeline towards Annie’s room. Pieck, Marcel and Bertholdt also made sure to avoid interacting with him, each of them in their own ways.
You sighed, pressing the bridge of your nose. You didn’t have the time to worry about it that morning.
A hard hit from Reiner made Zeke miss the ball and turn around to retrieve it. This gave Reiner the chance to look around, waving at you when he noticed your presence. You gave him a small smile and waved back.
“Your girlfriend is here.”
Zeke turned around quickly, his grey-blue eyes finding yours. You hated how a smile crept up your lips even after the disastrous night you had spent. His boyish grin and friendly wave would always bring warmth to your chest, and that spoke about how much your heart still belonged to him.
Your eyes were so fixated on each other you didn’t notice Reiner chuckling softly at the way you were looking at each other. Walking around the court, he called up Zeke, startling him and shook his hand. You didn’t listen to what he was saying but after a short conversation, Reiner turned around, waving at you again and started walking out the court. Zeke gestured to join him and you nodded, getting up and walking to the court with your hands in your pockets.
The moment you stepped a foot inside the court, Zeke started walking to you and met you halfway. He grabbed your face and placed a kiss on your lips, humming happily to himself. You kissed him back half-heartedly, your hands still secure inside your pockets without an ounce of need to put them around his neck like usual.
“You look so beautiful,” he said once he pulled away, holding your face tenderly.
You gave him a strained smile.
“Why did you call me so early?” you sighed.
Zeke’s grin didn’t waver, instead pressing a kiss on your forehead.
“Give me a second,” he said excitedly, before turning around and walking to the backpack that was against the wall. He left his tennis racket next to it and, after rummaging for a short while, he came back holding a baseball and a glove in his hand.
With a hand on the small of your back, he guided you until you were on the edge of the court. He carefully put the glove on your hand and ran back to the other edge of the court, both of you staying just on one side of the tennis court.
There was a part of you that wanted nothing more than to throw the glove away, stomp on it and demand answers from him but Zeke’s eager smile was nothing like you had seen before. He was really excited about this and even if you weren’t sure as to why , you felt compelled to follow along.
Zeke threw the ball at you and you took a couple of steps back to catch it with your glove. You winced in pain, your muscles still mad at you for drinking so much last night. You threw the ball as hard as you could but it didn’t reach your boyfriend, instead falling to the ground. Without saying a word, he shortened the distance between the two of you and threw the ball again.
A silent game of catch started between the two of you under the morning rays of sun. Seeing how happy Zeke was made you remember why you had fallen in love with him in the first place. He only smiled like that when he was around you, a huge grin on his face and a small couple of wrinkles on each side of his eyes. It was completely different from the way he smiled in social events and you couldn’t help but feel your heart flutter knowing it was only you that could see him like this.
It had been almost two years since a junior that sat a few seats away from you at your History of Philosophy class had asked to take a look at your notes at the end of your second class. He confessed it was his third time taking the course as he has failed it twice already. It was his last chance to pass the course and he had seen you taking a lot of notes and answering questions right, hence he was asking for your help. You couldn’t help but giggle at the image of this tall junior asking for the help of a freshman but you agreed and even offered to help him prepare for the exam if he really needed it.
That was the first time he truly smiled at you. And since then you had been hooked.
From a hidden makeout session at the back of the library to him introducing you to his half-brother, you had suddenly become the ‘it couple’ on campus. Zeke always took you out to social gatherings along with his classmates, presenting you as his girlfriend and keeping an arm around your shoulders at all times, letting everyone know who you were with.
Time went by and he even took you to his grandparents’ house, a lovely old couple that lived on the edge of town. You had dinner with them and smiled as they went on and on about how much they loved and were proud of their grandson. As they told you endearing but slightly embarrassing stories about Zeke when he was a little kid, you couldn’t help but notice they didn’t mention his parents in any of the stories. When you went to the kitchen to help his grandmother bring the dessert you tried looking for a picture of his parents and didn’t find it either. But you knew better than to ask.
The conversation ran long and when you two noticed, it was already too late to drive back, so you both decided to stay at their house for the night. After his grandparents had gone to sleep, you sat in front of the chimney, sitting next to each other, your head on his shoulder and enjoying the soft music coming from his phone. Fleetwood Mac’s ‘Rumours’ album was one of Zeke’s favourite albums and it was slowly starting to become yours as well.
A sniffle distracted your thoughts.
You pulled away immediately, kneeling and holding his face tenderly. It seemed Zeke had been crying for quite some time now and your eyes filled with worry.
“Baby, are you okay? What’s wrong?” you whispered, your thumbs wiping the tears running down his cheeks to his beard.
“I miss him,” he mumbled.
“Your dad?” you asked softly.
Zeke shook his head and averted his gaze from you. You turned his head back to you again and pressed a kiss on his forehead.
“You can talk to me, Zeke. Stronger together, right?” you said with a soft smile. He reciprocated it with a small nod.
Words fell from Zeke’s mouth like a broken dam, tears falling from his eyes quicker than you were able to kiss them away. You listened to him in silence, your fingers running across his dark blond locks, trying your best to soothe him as he tripped over his own words, painting a picture of his childhood.
He told you about their parents and their strong alliance with a political party when he was a kid. How they would talk to him about the party’s history and why he should be on their side, often getting irritated at him for not remembering all the details. He blamed himself for being too young to understand, for not paying enough attention when they talked to him about it. When a chance arrived for him to apply to a scholarship for middle school in a very prestigious private school, both his parents registered him, saying he should study hard to get that scholarship so he could start talking about the political party to the sons and daughters of the high class, so more people could support them.
But Zeke had never been good at school. He reminded you the reason you had met was that he had already failed a course twice, only salvaging it because you tutored him. So when he was ordered to get that scholarship, he studied day and night, sometimes not even going to bed because he wanted to make his parents happy and going to school without having slept even for a minute. But his scores were still low, igniting long and loud fights between his mom and dad, making him silently weep inside his bedroom as he listened to how much of a disappointment he was.
“You’re not a disappointment,” you interrupted him. His eyes that had been set on the chimney turned to you and he lifted the corners of his mouth.
You knew he didn’t believe you.
“They were taken by the police a few days before my scholarship exam. Turns out the political party they were into was… a bit radical.” He didn’t comment further and you thought it was best not to ask for details. “So I came to live with my grandparents. I was enrolled in public middle school and got a sports scholarship to get into university, hence why I’m a part of the swimming team.”
“Are they still…” your question died in your lips.
“In prison? No,” Zeke sighed, taking his glasses off and passing a hand across his face. “They got out after a couple of years. My mom died in a car accident shortly after and my dad remarried Eren’s mom. He lives with her now. Honestly, she’s a very sweet woman, she has always been kind to me. I don’t know how she stands him,” he said with a small chuckle.
“Even so, it’s okay to miss him, you know? Families are… complicated. So it wouldn’t be wrong for you to miss him from time to time.”
“I meant I miss Ksaver,” Zeke said, a sad smile on his lips. He took your hand in his, playing with it absentmindedly. “He was my science teacher at elementary school. He noticed how much I was struggling and how little sleep I was getting. He offered to tutor me some afternoons and we always ended up playing catch for a while before I had to go home. I think I was only able to go by because I could always look for spending my afternoons with him. We kept in touch when I went to middle school and he was always willing to help me out whenever I needed help with my classes or with the girls,” he said, a chuckle escaping his lips. “He lent me his jacket for my first date and he was the one I told about my first kiss with a girl in high school.”
You smiled sweetly, squeezing his hand softly.
“I wish I could have introduced you to him. But he… died, a couple of weeks after I started uni. Cancer. I never knew,” he said bitterly, biting the inside of his cheek. “So being here, listening to my grandparents tell you stories about when I was a kid… just made me remember him, you know? And shit— I really miss him.”
That night when you went to bed, you made sure to hold him a little tighter as he laid his body on top of yours. The feeling of his beard scratching your skin as he kissed your neck made you claw your nails on his muscular back. The room was filled with the sweetest breathy moans as you tried your best to be silent so you didn’t wake his grandparents up.
He pressed a long kiss on your lips before getting off of you, rummaging through his pants and trying to find a spare condom in his pockets. You waited as he put it on, fingertips gently tracing his forearms as a subtle reminder you were still there. Zeke hovered over you with a loving smile, his grey-blue eyes locked in yours making you feel as if you were the only woman he had ever even glanced at.
He slid into you, your lips parting as your body adjusted to his length. He started at a calm pace, his pelvis rubbing just right against your clit, making you see stars every time he moved. You held tightly on his muscular arms, moving your hips as you desperately craved for more.
It wasn’t long until he was pulling out of you, turning you on your stomach and thrusting inside of you again. It didn’t surprise you, he had always shown a preference for fucking you from behind.
Zeke’s hands were holding your waist tightly while he kept bucking his hips against you, his hot breath tickling your ear. The low grunts coming out of his mouth as he buried himself in you were all you could think about as you muffled your moans on the pillow. His fingers were digging on your skin, for sure leaving marks for you to find the next day, a hobby you had grown fond of ever since you started sleeping with Zeke. He was relentless, hips rutting against you without mercy, each thrust getting deeper and deeper inside of you.
“Shit, you give it so good to me, baby,” he grunted, bitting down on your shoulder. You whimpered, closing your fists on the sheets as you tried to arch your back even more to him. “Yeah, just like that— such a good girl to me.”
The way he increased his rhythm for a few seconds and then stilled behind you let you know he has reached his high. You felt as he rolled away from your body, lying on your side with a content smile, lips parted as he tried to regain his breath. You smiled softly at him and caressed his cheek with your knuckles.
Maybe it was a stretch, but you wished to have the power to stop him from ever getting hurt again. You wanted to protect that smile at all costs, not even letting the cold air touch him or anything that could ever threaten his well-being again. It was at that moment that you decided you would make sure he was the happiest man he could be as long as you were there.
As you saw Zeke smile as he threw the baseball, you remembered your vow. He was really the prettiest when he smiled. After your last throw, he caught it and gestured to you to come closer. He kissed you once again and this time you melted in his touch, the familiar taste of his lips taking you back to that night in front of the fire. He put the glove and baseball into his backpack and took your hand, placing a small kiss on the back of it.
“C’mon. Let's get breakfast.”
Finding an isolated spot on campus was easy, both of you sitting down under a tree. On your way there, Zeke had bought a couple of juice boxes from a vending machine and once you had gotten comfortable on the ground you realized he had packed a couple of sandwiches for both of you. You took one and smiled at him as a thank you.
“Have you thought about trying out for the baseball team? Bet you would do great there,” you commented, taking your first bite.
“I… I honestly haven’t played in forever,” Zeke said, shaking his head. “Hell, I hadn’t played like this since Ksaver died.”
“What changed?” you asked softly.
“Found this baseball while looking through my tennis stuff this morning as I was leaving to play with Reiner. So I brought them with me because…” he made a pause, looking down at his sandwich. “I wanted to play with you. I wanted to— to share this with you. You know how much it means to me and I couldn’t think of anyone else I wanted to do this with after all these years.”
You smiled at his words and right when you were leaning to kiss him, the memory of Yelena leaving his house hit you. Right. You had seen them, how had you forgotten about this?
Zeke noticed the way your smile dropped and furrowed his eyebrows in concern.
“I saw her kissing you,” you said, in a makeshift stern voice. Zeke’s frown deepened.
“What?”
“Yelena. I saw you kissing Yelena last night when she left your house,” you said, the pressure on your chest making it hard to talk. You took a deep breath, trying to alleviate it.
“Wait, wait, last night? Where were you?” he asked, confused.
“I— a few houses away. I wanted to say hi but I saw her and— I saw you two kissing, Zeke, aren't you going to say anything?” you demanded, your voice breaking at the end.
“Baby, I was confused as to why you were saying this because we didn’t kiss. I have never kissed Yelena in my life.”
“Zeke, I saw you,” you said in a pained voice. “I fucking saw you and—”
“Wait, was that why you called?” he interrupted you. “I’m sorry, baby, I really am. I’m just having trouble understanding because we never kissed. The closest thing to that happening was Yelena kissing my cheek goodnight and that’s it.”
“But I—”
“You just said you were a couple of houses away. Don’t you think you could have confused a friendly kiss on the cheek with her kissing my lips? As if I would ever let her,” Zeke said, taking a sip of his juice. “She knows how much I’m in love with you. Hell, I’ve even told her how I plan to marry you once you graduate.”
You felt your cheeks heating at his words and then immediately shook your head, trying to focus.
“Porco saw you too.”
At this, Zeke’s calm expression turned into a disgusted one.
“Baby, please,” he sighed, rolling his eyes. “Porco will say anything to get you away from me. You know he’s in love with you, right?” he asked. You averted his gaze, looking down at your sandwich. “He’s so obvious about it. He’ll say anything to make you doubt your relationship with me enough for him to get a chance. Bet he kept insisting on you leaving me after you mistakenly believed Yelena kissed me last night.”
Memories of Porco’s arms around your body and his hazel eyes looking at you as he kissed your palm crept inside your head, guilt leaving a bitter taste in your mouth. Zeke was right. You were a few houses apart and all you had seen was her kissing the corner of his mouth, never a full kiss on the lips. And on top of that, you had been drinking a lot. There was a big chance you had perceived the moment differently and… Porco had definitely egged you on your distrust.
“You did nothing wrong,” Zeke assured you, taking one of your hands in his. “You trust people too much, you’re too good. But please don’t believe Porco’s intentions are innocent in any way.”
You nodded, keeping your head down. At this, Zeke scooted over to your side, grabbing your face gently and kissing your forehead. You smiled at his action and lifted your face until your lips met. A chaste kiss was exchanged, making the both of you smile.
“I’m sorry for… insisting on this but can I ask you something else about last night?” you asked in a small voice.
Zeke nodded. “Sure, anything that will make you feel better.”
“Why was Yelena with you last night? Why did she leave so late?”
“Yelena was going through a rough time, stuff with her family and the fact she likes girls,” Zeke explained, biting down on his sandwich. “Her family is very religious so it’s… a touchy subject. She needed to talk and we did just that— talk until she was feeling better.”
You nodded, still with a small frown on your face.
“But I asked you, I— I called you and I asked if the movies were fun by yourself.”
“And I told you I always preferred watching movies alone,” Zeke reminded you. “I didn’t lie, I really do. I’ve told you this before. Besides, I didn’t just want to air out her business. It was private for a reason.”
“But her Instagram—”
“Darling, don’t mind her. Please, as far as I know, she could have made that post in case her family saw it. She’s not even out on campus, so… I don’t know,” he shrugged. “But don’t think about it too hard. She’s my friend but trust me when I say she’s not worth your time.”
You felt stupid. So damn stupid for ever believing Zeke was cheating on you. All of Yelena’s Instagram photos made so much sense now that you knew she was trying to present herself as straight. Surely you would have preferred her to use any other guy than your boyfriend but… it just made sense. Since Zeke was the only one that knew about her sexuality, she made sure not to foolishly lead him on since he knew it was all a charade.
And the fact Zeke wasn’t asking about Porco— God, you didn’t deserve him. You had just admitted to being outside with Porco at three in the morning and he hadn’t batted an eye. He didn’t need proof or to interrogate you to trust you would never cheat on him.
“Stop worrying your pretty head around it. We’re good, okay?” he assured you, nudging your shoulder playfully. “Let's just forget about this whole thing, okay?”
“Okay,” you smiled.
Zeke took one last bite of his sandwich, shaking his hands to get rid of the crumbs. He scooted until his back was against the tree and pulled you by your wrist, content in how you were giggling as he set you between his legs, with your back on his chest.
“Thank you for meeting me this early without notice. When I found Ksaver’s baseball I just knew I wanted to share that moment with you,” he said, resting his chin on your shoulder and putting his arms around your waist. “I’m so weak when it comes to… remembering things from my past. But I know I can always count on you. You’re so much stronger than I am. Always have been.”
Your mind went back to Porco pushing you away after you tried to kiss him just a few hours ago.
“I don’t know about that,” you whispered.
“But you are. And that’s one of the reasons I’m so in love with you,” he smiled, pressing a kiss on your shoulder. “One of the reasons I plan to ask you to marry me as soon as you graduate. We’re stronger together, remember?”
Your heart fluttered at his words.
“Yes,” you nodded with a soft smile .”We are.”
343 notes · View notes
kanmom51 · 3 years
Text
JM JK timeline.- my observations how they grew over the years
Disclaimer: these are my own opinions and conclusions.  Feel free to disagree, but hate or aggression will be unacceptable.
2017 - Part 3
Ooh, we have reached a major event here.  Serendipity. 4 September 2017, or is it 1 September 2017 (??), as I will explain bellow. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BEMaH9Sm3lQ&t=16s .  
Or what I like to call:  JM’s love ode to JK.
Now tell me this: If Jimin’s song Serendipity was released 4th September 2017, and uploaded to BangtanTv on 5th September 2017, why is the date stamped on the MV 1 Sep 2017? 
 Does that date mean something? Let me think for a second….oh, it does, doesn’t it?  It’s someone’s birthday !!!
JM tells us himself: “All of this isn’t just a coincidence”.
Serendipity is a beautiful love song, and I honestly believe it is JM’s love ode to JK, a birthday present to his love.  
I am aware that Jimin is not the one who wrote the lyrics for the song.  RM did though.  RM, that at this point was very much aware of the relationship and JM’s great love for JK. RM that had written JK’s Begin, a song that everyone agrees is a very personal song of JK’s.  
The “I am you, you are me” line actually originated from a song released by Zico in early 2016.  There are theories that Jikook used a reference from that songs MV (the band aids on their fingers) during a Puma fan sign on April 2nd 2016.  So, if this is true and the line had special meaning for them to start with, and it found it’s way into the song lyrics... feel free to make your conclusions...
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And although we have no way of knowing just how involved JM was in the process of writing this song (did he ask for a love song? Did he give ideas to insert into the song, like destiny, not being a coincidence, the cat?), but at the end of the day, JM ‘owns’ the song, believes in what he is singing.  When he talks about the song you can feel the emotional personal connection he has with the song.  This is his song,  and he sings it for JK.  And JK knows this is Jimin’s gift to him.  
Serendipity related, check out the 18th September Dance with DNA Vlive -  https://www.vlive.tv/video/42069 .
JK’s reaction when JM says Serendipity is his favourite song.  So cute. The thing with this one is that you could easily overlook it or not read too much into it. Only Suga’s reaction here is the tell all.  
At the point that JK is acting all shy and smiley to himself, Suga moves closer to him, whispering “Jungkookah”, something that brings on a change to JK’s entire facial expression.  There’s even a slight head nod from Suga when JK wipes the smile off his face.  
Suga hinting to JK not to be so obvious, only made it more obvious.  I also noticed that just before JM starts singing Serendipity, just after he was asked what his favourite song from the album is, JK looks sideways to Suga, as if he knows he isn’t supposed to react too obviously – looks a bit like little JK might have been scolded or reigned in prior to the live broadcast.    Remember that this is really quite a short time after the song’s release, so JK’s excitement, happiness, is still really fresh.  The song is for him, and it’s JM’s favourite...
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I am not going to analyse the MV, but there are many who have done so before me.  Was JM involved in the planning and did he have any input to the choices made?  Idk.  There is a similarity to the motif of the DNA MV. Is it a coincidence that the dominant colour used is JK’s favourite colour? Who knows. But doesn’t the song say “all of this is not a coincidence”?
Add to that JM starting to use the paw print emoji by JK’s name on Twitter?  A coincidence? Mmm… interesting.
From this point on it is clear that “you are me, I am you” is a JM and JK thing. 
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21 September 2017 BTS comeback show.  JK was in charge of putting together each of the members DNA.  Very enjoyable.  But why did JM have to mention again that JK comes to their room to sleep?  Also, how does JK know that JM doesn’t wake up Hobi when he is playing games late at night?  JM telling us how he now learnt how to play games – then what games was JM good last year (re: Vlive 22 April 2017)?
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22 September 2017 Love Yourself fan sign– JM singing Serendipity, JK joining in.  How happy JM looks when JK sings “just let me love you” with him all while making eye contact with each other at that point. The way JM looks at JK while singing the song.  Singing to him.  
Still think Serendipity is not JK and JM’s song?
They have a way of looking at one another that sometimes make me feel like I’m intruding on a very intimate moment.
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24 September 2017 SBS Inkigayo Super concert – found it!!!  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fb-_jkdxgh4 start watching at 3.36min.
This is the one I remembered, where JM, saw the need to grab JK’s butt, run his hand up and down his back side, right through the crack, repeatedly. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v7fv0CaQT9M start watching 11:30min , JM walks to his place past JK, lightly brushing his hand against JK.  
When I mention the brushes or light touches – this is what I mean (see attached photos).   Obviously, there will be those who say it wasn’t intentional, that he was walking by him and didn’t mean to touch him.  I say bollox to that (excuse the language).  
First, there was plenty of room not to walk so close to JK.  Second, if you notice, he circles JK only to make it back to the same actual side he was on to begin with.  All he had to do was back up, just like JK did, and not circle JK to make it to his place on stage.  Third, to me it looks as if he was aiming to touch JK’s hand, only it was too high up.
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26 September SBS MTV The Show.  Happy happy boys.  
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30 September 2017  Love Yourself fan sign Sinchon –  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SMIdoK9rfAI .  
Another one I was looking for.  I have seen this moment and wasn’t sure where or when it was from.  This is one of those clips Jikook’s use to show Jimin being jealous, and to be honest, first time I saw it it made me wonder too.  But watching it again and again, I have come to the conclusion that that wasn’t the issue.  
To me this is more JM being protective than JM being Jealous.  Setting the boundaries for V when it comes to JK, and it is something we see with JM more than once.  
JM wasn’t happy.  V wasn’t happy.  Boundaries were set.  
I actually wrote a separate post about this moment.  
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1 October 2017 BTS live – https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qwU-NOMLvqQ 
Tipsy JK must be a Jikooker. His guard is down, inhibitions are gone and he becomes really chatty and tends to say and do things that he most likely regrets later on.  We didn’t see the members drink what seemed to be alcohol, but the vibe I got from JK’s talkativeness and behaviour during the live was that he was tipsy.  Not outright drunk, but tipsy.
To the fan’s request to show his abs, JK starts checking himself out, looking under his T-shirt, only to be scolded by JM to keep it to himself.  This is also the first time we hear him Jikooking, talking about eating with Jin and JM, referring to them as Jin-jikook, and then turning to JM, while the others try to call them by another name (I wonder why…).  Did I not say tipsy JK is a Jikooker???
3 October 2017 Run BTS episode 22.  https://www.vlive.tv/video/43438 start 7.00min.
JM turns to JK asking him to vote for him.  The softness in JM’s voice when he asks him acting all coquettish.  The way JM approached JK and the way he spoke to him, that’s not the way someone talks to his mate, or to his ‘brother’.
There was a softness in the approach to JK.  coquettish is the only way I can describe it.
 Love hearts were added by the show’s editors, not me !!!! 
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12 October 2017 BTS countdown. Can be found on Dailymotion. 
All JM had to say was one word – Jungkookah and JK, surprisingly (not) chose him.  The look of joy on their faces at that point.  And again the editors with the heart emoji effects.  Uhm… 
JM and JK’s team was the team chosen by the fans, and guess what song they both choose to sing, as JM piggy backed JK? Their song obviously… Serendipity.  
And yet again, JM gets to tell us JK comes to his room to sleep.  We hear you JM.  We hear you.
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Jimin birthday surprise (BangtanTV 1 November 2017) - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6aAhNAl53ZY.
JM gets flowers sent from his father.  J-Hope and Suga pretend JM’s dad has arrived to surprise JM, Suga pointing and saying he saw him.  JK slowly backs up, shocked and alarmed smile on his face, trying to move behind RM.  Then the boys start laughing.  
Now, why do I think this is a moment worthy of my timeline?  Well, when the boys start laughing, revealing it was a joke, the one Suga points at, laughingly, is JK.  
The whole thing feels like a joke on JK, not JM.  JK is the one being teased.   Why would JK be so stressed out from JM’s dad being there?  And why would the boys be teasing him like that? Hm…
The funny thing is that the camera is on JK and Suga, not on JM, who was supposedly just told his father was there. That feels slightly strange to me. Wouldn’t they want to catch JM’s reaction? Not JK’s?
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28-30 October 2017 JK and JM Tokyo trip together.  This trip was long anticipated by JM.  He had been looking forward for his trip with JK for a long time.  It was a private trip planned and paid for by JK as a gift for JM.  What we know about the trip is mostly what they tell us in retrospect.  
Saying that, this was truly a memorable trip for them both, and they both can’t seem to shut up about it, talking about it at any possible moment.  JK telling us how JM stayed up (only JM?) until 5 am, so they both woke up at 12pm and missed out on plans they had for the morning, JM tells how they went shopping in Harajuku, how during their trip was the longest walk they took, referring to their trip during interviews.  As I mentioned – a memorable trip.  
31 October 2017 - When returning from the trip JM posts a selca/selfie.  I know I said I won’t be doing this, but rules are sometimes meant to be broken, and this specific selca is gorgeous, so…
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BTS Wings tour Japan documentary - filmed October 2017, published 12 November 2017 - https://www.dailymotion.com/video/x7sz5rq .  
Both acting cute together. For some reason, they are the only ones that are paired for the one on one interviews, when Suga, Jin and Hobi were all interviewed by themselves. 
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 Felt like JM and inhibitions were strangers during the group interview.  
Not really sure what JM was searching for in JK’s thigh during the group interview (when V was talking) – tupping, fingering and squeezing JK’s thigh.  And yet again RM and J-Hope’s reactions to die for.  Hobi eyes on the action throughout the whole episode, and RM when he notices, I would pay a lot of money to know what was going through his head at that point.  My educated guess is: “God, please get me out of here, why did I agree to be the leader????” LOL.
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Then when asked what their impressions were when coming to the dome, JM tells how JK was crying, all while caressing JK’s ear.  JK tells how he was emotional, and they look at each other.  All the while, RM’s face when JM touches JK’s ear, only to continue to place his hands on their shoulders respectively.
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JM continues to surprise, telling viewers to anticipate for JK’s sweat.  The minute he says that, RM turns to look towards Suga, the vibe I get is: “god, please help me here…”.  
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Then JM goes on to tell us how in his opinion JK’s sweat is beautiful, Holy water.  What???? J-hope repeats JM’s Holy water, then glances for just a second towards RM and looks down nervously – great save Hobi.
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The group interview was shot on JM’s birthday.  Maybe that had something to do with his good un-inhibited mood.
8 November 2017 – GCF in Tokyo - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XrTNLkqGrlc  .
While the Tokyo trip was JK’s birthday gift or JM.  GCF Tokyo is JK’s love ode to JM.  
One of JK’s grand gestures.  Up there with RB, as far as I am concerned.
This is not an analysis of GCFT, but I do have a few words to say on the matter. Explain why in my eyes this is a JK’s love ode to JM.  
This video was filmed and edited by JK, and JK alone.  It supposedly documents their trip together.  It was his choice and his alone to edit and publish this video and did so to JM’s surprise.  
In the video to start with, he lets us know that it’s the two of them, but from there on, other than seeing JK through the mirrors in the elevator while he is filming JM, the one we mostly see is JM.  JM smiling, JM goofing around, JM eating, JM enjoying himself on the Tea Cup ride at Disneyland, JM walking, JM dancing, and as a whole just JM having the time of his life. For a video that is documenting a trip to Tokyo, there is not too much of Tokyo we get to see.  
The end credits name JK as the photographer, director and editor, while naming JM as the actor.  
There is a strong romantic vibe to the video.  
JK’s editing choices, including his music choice for the video are well thought out.  His choice to edit to the beat of the song.  All cleverly thought out to accentuate both the footage and the lyrics of the song he chose:  ‘There for you’ by Troye Sivan and Martin Garrix.  
JM told us already: “this is not a coincidence”.  
The level of preparation from JK, acquiring the rights to use the song, the amount of time it took to go over the footage and edit the video, all while managing to do that will a full working schedule (working throughout the night). This was clearly something big for him.  His joy and pride when it was uploaded to Youtube, clearly showed, him smiley and dancing.
2 days prior to GCFT, on 6 November 2017, JM published his short clip of the trip.  JM too took the time to edit a cute footage of the trip, documenting both of them having fun. Putting them both side by side only emphasizes the difference and showcases just how much GCFT was all about JM, being JK’s love ode to JM.
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To be continued...
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nmikaelsonimagines · 3 years
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Better Man: A Klaus Mikaelson Imagine
Request from Anon: could you do better man from that album :) btw I love your writing <33
Hope this is okay for you lovely, and enjoy x 
Want to hear the song? Find a link to it just below:
Better Man
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Find me at a quarter to three, cigarette in my hand I'd be at every party, I wouldn't miss a chance
Leaning against the wall, Klaus watched Y/N mingle with her friends. He’d been here for two hours now, Y/N having convinced him to come along so he could be introduced as her boyfriend.
It had taken a lot of persuasion, some that wouldn’t be suitable to describe without a warning. He smirked as he remembered it all, his eyes falling to Y/N, the way her dress fit her body. God, she was beautiful, and she had the smile to make sure of it.
That smile was on her face now as she walked over to him. Klaus hummed as she wrapped her arms around him, resting her head on his shoulder, music still thumping in his ears. But he drowned all of that out when she spoke.
“Thank you for coming tonight. It means a lot.” She leant up and kissed his cheek, her lips lingering.
“Wouldn’t have missed it for the world, love.” And he wouldn’t have. Klaus wouldn’t have missed the chance to see that smile on Y/N’s face, would’ve gone to a thousand parties with crappy music and drunken youths if it meant seeing her happy.
She had changed him, he knew that. A hundred years ago, he never would have dreamed of such a thing.
New friends again and again, gone when the morning comes Demons I try to defend, but I couldn't get enough
Klaus was only here because he needed to be. If he didn’t show his face, the Governor wouldn’t endorse his family, and then the Mikaelson mansion would be knocked down. His family, homeless, again.
He didn’t like the Governor, saw him as a seedy old man who kept looking at Rebekah like she was something to eat. Little he did know that it was in fact the other way around. If it had been his choice, Klaus would have killed the man on sight and then taken all his money for himself, but he had promised Elijah to behave.
So he had trudged his way over to the Governor’s evening party, and was now leaning against the wall, a permanent scowl on his face.
He didn’t change it when she looked at him, a small smile on her face. The girl was pretty, yes, but she had that look about her that told him she would be in for more than sex. Klaus wasn’t ready for a relationship, not after the disaster that was the last one he had had. He continued to scowl at her until she moved on.
Over to Kol. Klaus rolled his eyes at his younger brother, knowing full well that by the end of the night the girl would be fully satisfied, but dead. One look at the Governor eyeing up Rebekah had Klaus giving in to the demonic voice in the back of his head, and he made his way over to Kol and the poor, unsuspecting human girl, with every intention of taking her off his brother and feasting on her himself.
Kol would get over it, moving onto another in the space of ten minutes.
If he had to endure this night, he might as well enjoy himself.
So much for behaving.
Fading away, fading away Wake up to someone with nothing to say
It didn’t matter that when Klaus woke up next to Y/N the following morning, they had nothing to say to each other. It didn’t matter when she hummed contentedly as he kissed his way up her neck, along her jaw line, before gently biting down on her earlobe. It didn’t matter when she threaded her fingers through his hair and pulled him to her, devouring his lips with her own.
They’d stumbled home last night, drunk enough that the rest of the world seemed blurry, but not so that when they made love, it faded away as it always did, just the two of them moving in perfect synchronicity.
It seemed they were headed back down that route this morning as their kisses grew more and more urgent.
Klaus still had nothing to say as Y/N climbed on top of him, his hands on her hips as she looked down at him. She was truly beautiful, and he couldn’t quite believe that he had lived centuries without her, didn’t dare imagine the next centuries without her.
He wanted her to know that, to make her feel like she was his entire world. He had never wanted anyone quite like he wanted her.
She had changed him, he knew that. Fifty years ago, he never would have dreamed of such a thing.
I'd never change, thought I'd never change Then you come and change it all
Klaus watched from the breakfast table as the young lady hurried past him, her head down and her cheeks flushed. She had been fun, a well-needed distraction and a moment of company. Elijah wasn’t speaking to him, and the rest of his siblings, well, they were currently in the middle of a very long sleep.
He had picked up the girl at a party, having noticed her dancing to the loud 70s music thumping through the club. It wasn’t to his taste, but she was, and it wasn’t long before he had persuaded her to come home with him, straight into his bed.
As he watched her leave, the door slamming behind her, Klaus wondered what Elijah would have said. He knew that his older brother would have scolded him for his sexual activities, for the broken hearts littered throughout the years.
“Well, at least I didn’t drain her,” Klaus would have snapped back. He had moved on from that particular activity a long time ago, leaving the mixture of sex and food to his younger brother.
“Why can’t you just find someone to spend your life with?” It was always that, or at least, a variation on that particular question. Klaus always scoffed, just as he did now imagining his brother’s words. Elijah wanted someone to come along and change Klaus, someone who would tame him.
Klaus was sure that would never happen. He had never even entertained the idea that he would be wrong.
With your love, your love, I'm a better, better man Darling, all of my wrongs, they led me right to you
“Good morning.” It was the lilt of Y/N’s voice, the way she leaned up onto her toes and kissed his cheek after he’d showered, that made Klaus smile. It was an ordinary, everyday activity that never failed to amaze him.
He watched as she turned back to making him breakfast, eyes trained on the slope of her back, the way shoulder blades that he had lovingly adored with his lips only a few moments before, moved as she did. Shoulder blades made for wings, and it wasn’t unusual for him to expect white feathers to burst forth from her skin.
He took the time to think, to look at the woman who had been his path to redemption, picking up the pieces of the hybrid that had fallen from grace more times than anyone could count. Y/N made Klaus better, in all senses of the word, her love for him making him see where he had gone so wrong over the centuries.
He walked over, wrapping his arms around her from behind, and murmuring against her temple.
“I love you, Y/N.”
He didn’t say it very often, not even to his siblings.
She had changed him, he knew that. A year ago, he never would have dreamed of such a thing.
Wrapped in your arms, I swear I'd die for Your love, your love, I'm a better, better man
Klaus scowled at the woman standing in front of him. She had been left by her friends to keep an eye on him, some part of an elaborate plan to make sure he was out of the way whilst they did whatever it was they were doing. Y/N. That was her name.
He decided pretty early on that he didn’t like her, especially when she tried to speak to him, a smirk to rival his own playing on her lips. He had considered killing her, but there were protection spells on her that he had no hope of breaking, and so had taken to pretending she didn’t exist.
Of course, that hadn’t proved very successful as she’d continued to taunt him, causing him to turn and glare at her. She just smiled, eyes twinkling in a way that he would have thought was beautiful if his blood hadn’t been boiling.
“Oh, so you are listening to me. Good to know.”
She was arrogant and clearly proud of herself, reminding Klaus too much of himself. He hoped this would be the last time he saw her.
Never in a million years did he think that one year on, he would be wrapped in her arms, kissing her like she was his only source of life. Elijah had told him that one day he would meet someone just like him, someone who would make him see his flaws, someone he would be willing to die for, someone whose love would make Klaus Mikaelson a better man.
It didn’t cross his mind, the thought that it might be her.
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dickspeightjrs · 3 years
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Better Than Regretting (au / 2.5k words / secret relationship / arranged marriage)
ao3 link
“You marrying a woman? Now that’s something I’d like to see,” Dean laughed from where he was stretched out on Castiel’s bed.
Castiel stopped his pacing across the room to glare at Dean. “This isn’t funny, Dean. My family are trying to arrange a marriage that I want no part of.”
Dean’s expression didn’t change and Castiel rolled his eyes. He wished his boyfriend would take things seriously sometimes.
There was no logical reason why Dean and Castiel would even know each other, let alone develop a relationship. And yet, here they were.
Castiel and his family came from old money. The wealthy life was all he ever knew. Though he would never call himself spoiled, Castiel knew he was privileged in more ways than one.
Dean, however, was orphaned at sixteen and was now helping to raise his younger brother, Sam, and send him to college in the fall.
They’d kept their relationship a secret from Castiel’s family from the beginning. Old money meant old traditions and Castiel knew his family wouldn’t approve of his sexuality or his choice of partner.
It worked for them for two years. Until now.
Upon him turning twenty-five, Castiel’s parents decided it was time for him to get married and they’d lined up a nice girl, Daphne, from a family that they knew from the country club. It just so happened that Castiel’s father also wanted to go into business with Daphne’s father. A coincidence that was not lost on Castiel.
“Come on, Cas,” Dean implored, “this is crazy. There’s no way you’re gonna marry this girl. I don’t care how much money her family has.”
Castiel was quiet, a million thoughts racing through his head. He was carefully avoiding Dean’s gaze.
“Wait,” Dean sat up straight on the bed. “You’re not thinking about actually going through with this?”
Castiel looked at Dean’s confused expression and quickly looked away again. “We could still see each other. It wouldn’t be any different to what we’re used to,” he murmured.
Dean stood up to come face to face with Castiel. He forced Castiel to make eye contact and looked into Castiel’s eyes with a pleading gaze.
“Cas, I love you,” Dean whispered. “I know I don’t say it enough, but I do. And I know you love me. You can’t do this.” He reached out a hand to hold Castiel’s.
“But my family.”
“Fuck your family, man.” Dean hissed. “They don’t care about you. If they did, they wouldn’t be doing this.”
“You know I can’t tell them about me, about us.” Castiel begged.
“For fuck’s sake, Cas. I’m not saying you gotta out yourself or tell them about us. I know how dangerous that could be for you.” Dean sighed. “Just stick up for yourself and tell them you want to live your own goddamn life!”
“It’s not that simple! I don’t see why we can’t just carry on as normal. You know I’ll never feel for her what I feel for you.”
“I know that. But to everyone else, everyone you know, she’ll be yours. And I don’t want to be the reason someone cheats on their wife.” Dean shook his head sadly. “That’s what my dad did to my mom, and you know how that ended. That poor girl you’re gonna marry doesn’t deserve that.”
“What are you saying, Dean?” Castiel asked, heart beating hard against his chest.
Dean sighed wearily. “I’m saying either tell your family to go fuck themselves, and come be with me and Sam. Or you stay with them and we end this.”
Castiel didn’t know what to do. He truly loved Dean more than anything. He wouldn’t take back one second of his time with him.
But he didn’t feel strong enough to leave his family. Castiel couldn’t imagine his father’s reaction if he said he wasn’t going to marry Daphne.
Castiel knew something like this would happen. His relationship with Dean was always too good to be true. They were too different. And those differences would always find a way to tear them apart.
Looking into Dean’s eyes as he made the realisation of Castiel’s decision was the most heart-breaking thing Castiel had ever witnessed.
Dean nodded to himself. He tried to avoid Castiel’s gaze but Castiel could see the tears forming in his boyfriend’s eyes.
They stood in silence for a few moments before Dean cleared his throat and looked back to Castiel. He took a deep, steadying breath and walked towards Castiel.
Castiel held his breath and stayed still.
Dean lifted a shaky hand to Castiel’s cheek and wiped away a tear Castiel didn’t realise was there. He looked lovingly into Castiel’s eyes before pulling him in for a soft kiss.
It was the most gut-wrenching kiss of Castiel’s life. It was a goodbye.
When Dean pulled away, he looked one last time into Castiel’s eyes, gave him a sad smile and moved away.
Castiel watched as Dean collected his jacket and keys. He watched as Dean walked out of his bedroom and didn’t look back.
Castiel remained frozen on the spot, tears now flowing freely down his face. He only moved when he could hear the deep rumble of Dean’s car starting up outside and fading into the distance.
Then he was left in silence.
 *  *  *
 Castiel felt sweat drip down his back under his shirt and suit jacket.
He hadn’t wanted to get married in the height of summer, but time had clearly been of the essence. The deal Castiel’s father made with Daphne’s family would only be complete once the wedding was over so Castiel’s father was eager to rush through the marriage. The wedding was set for a Saturday in late July – only two months after the initial engagement.
Which also meant two months since Castiel last saw and spoke to Dean.
He sighed a little in relief when the doors to the church opened, letting in a waft of air that, though wasn’t necessarily cool, was cooler than the oppressive heat of the church. Standing at the altar waiting for the ceremony to start was starting to feel like a lifetime in the sweltering heat. The doors were left wide open, along with the windows, to get an airflow through the building.
People were starting to arrive and take their seats. Castiel couldn’t say he even knew most of them. They all seemed to be associates of his father. Castiel didn’t have many friends and the only friends he did have he made through Dean. He hadn’t seen them for months either. Though, he didn’t blame them for staying with Dean.
He felt a wave of sickness go through him at the thought of Dean. He truly did miss him.
The feeling of a soft hand on his shoulder made him turn. It was his brother, Gabriel, the only person in the church who knew what Castiel was going through.
Soon into the beginning of their relationship, Dean and Castiel had been caught in Castiel’s bed by Gabriel.
Castiel had thought they were alone in the house. His parents had just left for a vacation and Gabriel was meant to be visiting friends. It turned out that those friends cancelled, and Gabriel came back to the house to hang out with his brother.
Castiel had panicked for a minute before Gabriel just laughed and held out a hand to Dean who had shaken it awkwardly, painfully aware of his near nakedness. After a little teasing and promising not to tell anyone, Gabriel had eventually left them alone.
Gabriel gave Castiel a reassuring smile and patted his shoulder. “Hang in there, bro.”
Castiel smiled nervously in response. He couldn’t muster the energy for anything else lest he break down and cry right in front of everyone.
He didn’t want to do this at all. He regretted what happened with Dean ever since it happened. But he knew he had to be loyal to his family. And Dean would never take him back now anyway. Castiel had thrown away any chance of that.
The priest walked up to Castiel. “The bride is here. We’re ready to begin.”
Castiel simply nodded and got into position. They’d rehearsed the wedding countless times so everything ran smoothly. Castiel had felt it a little unnecessary but he wasn’t going to argue with his father.
The music began and Castiel looked at the entrance to see Daphne walk down the aisle. She truly did look beautiful in her dress. Castiel felt another wave of nausea hit him at the thought of dragging her innocently into this mess.
The ceremony soon began. It was quiet around the church as the priest went through his sermon.
Castiel muted the words. Again, he hadn’t been involved much in the content of the ceremony. It all felt fake. Like if God was really looking down on them now, he’d curse Castiel for making a mockery of marriage.
Sweat once again dripped down Castiel’s back. He was sure he might just pass out from the sheer exhaustion of the heat and the thoughts rushing through his head. He hadn’t been right ever since Dean left.  
Zoning out from the sermon completely, Castiel let himself drift to some of his favourite memories with Dean.
The sticky heat on his skin reminded him of last summer with Dean. He’d managed to convince his parents to go to their summer home without him. He’d had three whole months of summer without his parents and spent all that time with Dean.
Castiel remembered the warm smell of Dean’s skin against his own one night after they’d had sex. Dean was laughing at something Castiel had said that Castiel didn’t even intend to be funny. But Castiel never minded. Dean’s laugh was beautiful.
Dean had whispered against Castiel’s ear, as he placed delicate kisses along Castiel’s skin, that spending the summer with Castiel had been more than he could ever dreamed.
Castiel hadn’t understood at the time. He loved spending the summer with Dean too, but all they’d really done was hang out with his brother a little and take long drives in Dean’s Impala.
But now, he got it. It had been the simple things that Dean had treasured most. Castiel would give anything to be back in that car with Dean at his side, singing along to whatever rock album he’d put into the tape deck that day. They’d pull over, after a while, to a deserted area and trade lazy kisses until the sun started to fade in the sky. Then Dean would drive them back, this time with only the sound of the engine to accompany them.
Castiel was sure he could still hear the sweet rumble of the engine.
He blinked back to reality when he realised the priest had stopped talking and was looking past Castiel and frowning.
Castiel knew then that he wasn’t imagining the sound. The Impala could be heard roaring in the distance. And it was getting closer.
Frowning a little in confusion and barely daring to hope, Castiel turned and faced the same way as the priest. Daphne and many of guests also shifted to see what could be causing so much noise.
The frown left Castiel’s face when the shiny bonnet of a sleek black car pulled up onto to curb directly outside the church doors.
Castiel was frozen in place and held his breath as he saw Dean get out of the car and walk around to lean against the side door. He made eye contact with Castiel but otherwise made no move to enter the church.
Castiel could feel eyes start to turn back to him. No one knew of him and Dean but Castiel’s demeanour must have clued them in that Dean was there for him.
In his peripheral vision, Castiel noticed Sam in the backseat of the car. Boxes were piled up next to him.
Then it clicked.
Sam was going to Stanford for college. Dean was taking him and probably not coming back. This was Castiel’s last chance. Dean was giving him one last chance.
Castiel finally unglued his gaze from Dean and turned to Daphne next to him. She just gave him a small reassuring smile. Perhaps Castiel hadn’t given her enough credit when he’d thought she was just a naïve girl.
He turned to look at his brother stood behind him. Gabriel just grinned wildly, slyly, like he may have had something to do with this.
The priest cleared his throat and it spurred Castiel into action.
Regaining eye contact with Dean, he stepped down hesitantly from the platform.
The movement was tracked by Dean whose face went from one of determined nonchalance to one with a slight flicker of hope. It was a change that onlookers might not have noticed. But Castiel did. He knew Dean better than anyone.
It was the smallness of hope in Dean’s eye that made Castiel know he had all the information he’d ever need.
Without a second’s more hesitation, Castiel broke into a run, not looking back. He only kept his eyes on Dean as he saw the man’s face turn into an ever-widening grin.
The intense heat of the Kansas sun hit Castiel as he flew out of the church doors, but it was nothing compared to the sheer strength of the arms that immediately came up to wrap around Castiel’s body.
Castiel put his face into the crook of Dean’s neck, taking in his scent and reassuring himself that this was really happening.
Dean squeezed him again and breathed in Castiel’s scent too.
They were only broken apart by the sound of the window being lowered in the car and Sam’s voice coming out.
“Um, guys? I hate to break up the reunion, but Cas’ dad is coming, and he doesn’t look happy,” he warned.
With wide eyes, both men snapped out of their trance and turned to see Castiel’s father storming his way down the aisle, his face redder than Castiel had ever seen it. Gabriel was making a feeble attempt to calm their father down but the grin on his face betrayed his attempted determination.
Dean and Castiel quickly scrambled to get into the car.
Just as Castiel’s father reached the car and was about to open the passenger door, Dean turned the ignition and they peeled off down the street towards the highway.
Once they were clear of the church, Dean chuckled. “So Cas, how does California sound to you?”
Castiel looked at Dean and knew he was trying to hide his nerves. He reached over to grasp Dean’s hand. Castiel had let go of Dean once before. He was never going to do it again.
“It sounds perfect.”
Dean smiled and brought Castiel’s hand to his lips, not taking his eyes off the road in front of them. “Good.”
Castiel smiled too. But, despite the sure feeling that he’d finally done the right thing, he couldn’t help but feel guilty for leaving Daphne like that. She may not have been that happy with the arrangement either, but he felt bad for leaving her without a word. He thought that, perhaps when they arrived in California, he’d write her a letter explaining everything and hope she’d forgive him.
As if sensing Castiel’s thoughts, Dean gave Castiel’s hand a little squeeze and shot him a cheeky grin.
“Not having second thoughts already?” Dean teased.
“Never,” Castiel shook his head. “I’m glad you crashed the wedding.”
-
A/N: Based loosely on the song ‘Crashed the Wedding’ by Busted
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innocence - 24
PAIRING: bodyguard!bucky barnes x innocent actress!reader
WARNINGS: none
A/N: i took three weeks to post, i am very sorry but i’ll now be posting the holiday chapters i was supposed to but i got lost in eating mince pies. hope you enjoy xx
NEXT CHAPTER
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   - Bucky, what are you doing? - Y/N smirked as she returned from set, still dressed in a scandalous dress covered by a beige rain coat. Small droplets of water covered the beige waterproof fabric which rolled onto the ground as she made her way further into the small flat. 
Bucky was sat in bed, looking at a pile of clothing thrown next to an open old military green rucksack by his feet. A few worn out brown leathered tags we attached to one of the handles and had she been wearing her glasses, she could’ve probably guessed what it was written on them. The brown haired man rose his head at the mention of his name, eyes widening at what she was wearing. He was used to seeing her in tight, revealing dresses but this dress was something else and he wondered how she could walk with such a skin tight garment. 
    - I’m just deciding what to pack. - he shrugged, trying to forget about the dress his girlfriend was wearing. 
   - Just pack warm. - she sat next to him, leaning her head against his shoulder, an immediate smile extending in her limps. - Mum said it might snow. Can you imagine, a white Christmas?
   - Did they give you a bad time on set?
A bad time? A bad time was an understatement. She had gotten an earful from everyone who passed by her that day from her manager to her personal assistant to even Mr. Hayworth who just screamed about how stupid she was. Even half the cast was upset, not enjoying the publicity it would bring to the movie and while she would normally end up crying in her trailer, Chuck ensured to follow her around to make sure she was alright. Yet, none of it matter. It was the last day of shooting before she got to go home to her parents and forget about the mess she had willingly created. It was only a day before she could spend the holidays with someone who chose her and kept choosing her for the first time. It really didn’t matter if she had a bad time, things were starting to look up for her. 
    - Other than the stripper dress? Not as bad. - she giggled. Bucky looked at her, trying to peak through the coat. - I was thinking ... maybe we should have a nice long bath together? I’ll light some candles, get some nice wine from the shop down the street.
    - You little vixen, I still have to go see my sister. If I take a bath with you I will end up staying much more time than I should. - Bucky kissed the side of her face. - Did you wear that dress just to tempt me?
    - I would never. It is not my fault you cannot control yourself. 
    - That dress is staying until I come back, though.
    - I want to come. - she got up from the bed, pulling the dress from her body and grabbing her white jumper and pair of jeans from the wardrobe. - You’re meeting my family, it’s only fair I meet yours.
    - I’ve told you already, princess. We don’t wanna poke the media, they’ll bite us back with no mercy. I don’t want people hurting you because of me.
    - You can’t sneak me into a care home? My, my, Mr. Barnes, I thought you could get anyone into anywhere. Your CV said so.
   - Are you doubting my abilities, princess? - he grabbed her by the waist, pulling her closing to him before starting to tickle her sides. - It’ll be boring to you, my princess. Just stay here, put back that tight little dress and I’ll make it worth your time.
   - No way. I’m meeting your sister. 
   - No baby pictures, Y/N. 
   - I would never. - she wrapped her arms around his neck, pulling him in for a hard felt yet soft kiss. - Only childhood stories. 
Bucky rolled his eyes, handing her the jacket and hat as they made their way onto a taxi. Bucky visited his sister a lot but he’d never mentioned Y/N. Not that he didn’t want to, of course he did. In all honesty, he could speak about his girl for as long as someone allowed him. However, Y/N was still a public personality and he wouldn’t want to let something out that she wasn’t comfortable with people knowing. Besides, he knew how much his sister still adored to gossip and he wouldn’t want to possibly hurt Y/N or be the cause. 
She, on the other hand, was excited. She knew Steve and Steve was the oldest of Bucky’s friends but she never thought she would get to meet someone from his family or that he’d even want to introduce her to someone from his family. After all, he was a war hero and Y/N was an actress from a small town in London who everyone seemed to despise at the moment.
The man drove them up to small complex building of what seemed to be newly built flats. Bucky was the first one off the taxi, running up to her side so he could open the door. It always left her feeling like a school girl; the pageantry, it is. She never believed she would find someone and the fact someone rushed to go and open the door for her and held his hand out.
    - Anything you’d like to confess before I ask your sister? - Y/N teased, hugging him side eyes as he led her to the entrance.
    - Do not believe what she says, I did not date too many girls.
    - Steve disagrees with that.
    - How would you know what Steve agrees or disagrees with? 
    - I called him to wish him happy holidays.
    - I didn’t know you and Steve were friendly.
    - Don’t be jealous, love. I’m not stealing your best friend. - Y/N pinched his cheek playfully as the two of them stopped in front of a wooden door with the number 35 in gold numbers pinned to it.
Bucky knocked on the door, announcing himself before holding Y/N once again close to him. He went through his mind, wondering if there was anything Rebecca could tell which would upset her. Sure, he used to be a bit of a womaniser in his youth but Y/N knew that. He hadn’t gotten anyone pregnant, he hadn’t proposed and ran off, he was off the hook. Still, he didn’t like the idea of Becca telling Y/N about his past quests.
Y/N waited patiently until someone held the door. The first thing she noticed were her eyes, the same as Bucky’s and she could recognise them anywhere. The woman had perfectly styled grey hair and a smile on her lips as she recognised her brother.
    - Who is this lovely girl, Buck? You didn’t tell me you’d bring company, I would’ve gotten some biscuits. 
   - This is Y/N, she’s my girlfriend. 
   - Steve told me you were seeing someone, I just didn’t think she’d be this pretty. Come in, come in. - Becca grabbed Y/N away from Bucky leading her to the living room. - What you wanted is in the bedroom, Buck.
   - Behave. - Bucky told his sister before he went into the bedroom to look for what he had come in from. 
   - I have some photos I think you’d love to see, darlin’. - she pointed the couch for Y/N to sit in before waddling to the big mahogany bookcase. She had a huge collection of books from old classics to new contemporary masterpieces which Y/N would love to read someday. The house itself was cozy, way more comfortable than other care homes she’d seen but she guessed Bucky would’ve only allowed for the best for his little sister. - It’s been ages since I’ve seen one of Bucky’s girlfriends. Not that he used to bring them home, but I used to sneak in and take a peak. You’re definitely the prettiest of all of them. 
   - Thank you. - Y/N couldn’t help but feel her cheeks heat up.
   - Ah, there it is. - she dropped a photo album on Y/N’s lap. - My father gave my mother a photo camera and she went crazy with it. Too many photos. However, when Bucky was born, it was a special occasion. Dad used to say she wanted a professional photo taken with her Jamie. 
She pointed at a photo of an woman probably in her early 20s holding a baby wrapped in several blankets, accompanied by a man who Bucky resembled very much. Her fingers traced the face of the baby, a little smile forming on her lips. It was nice to see him like that, normal. No mentions of the Winter Soldier, no pain, none of her constant drama due to her profession.
   - He was the eldest of four and despite what my mother would say, he was always the favourite. The only boy. He got away with whatever he wanted.
   - Bucky has three siblings?
   - Three sisters. Some of them didn’t survive. It was war. - her voice softened with sadness as she turned the page for a photo that Y/N wasn’t expecting to see. The same woman from before, his mother, was hugging a shirtless Bucky who had some boxing gloves on. Her face contorted into curiosity as Bucky exited the room and leaned against the couch, standing next to the two women.
  - What are you two ladies looking at? - Bucky kissed Y/N’s head, putting his hand on her shoulder. 
  - I think Y/N is very curious about your welterweight boxing past.
  - You did boxing?
  - Princess, I was a three-time YMCA Welterweight boxing champion. - Bucky closed the album before any of the photos of him with some of the ladies he used to hang around with showed up. - Becca, we should get going. We have an early flight tomorrow. 
  - You need to bring her more often. - Rebecca got up from the couch to accompany them to the door. - Did you find what you were looking for?
  - Yes, Beccs. Thank you so much for keeping it all these years.
  - Pretty sure mum would come back to haunt me if I hadn’t. Have fun meeting the parents. - she kissed Bucky’s cheek allowing for the two of them to leave. Bucky immediately wrapped his chunky knitted scarf, something his grandma had knitted for him ages ago, around Y/N’s neck, pulling her to his side.
He couldn’t truly remember a time where he was this happy, so full of need to continue living. She really brought him to this sort of weird normality where his past didn’t seem to affect him or at least not as strongly as it usually did. The two walked into grey skies, it was probably going to rain but none of them cared, walking side by side like those couples on Christmas songs. 
   - A boxing champion? 
   - Knock it off, princess. - Bucky helped her into the taxi, telling the driver his address before fastening his seat belt. - It was a long time ago.
   - Do you miss her? - she questioned, leaning her head against his shoulder, watching the horizons run through in blurs. - Your mother. Rebecca said you were the favourite.
   - Rebecca is always saying that. - he scoffed. - I do miss her. She was a swell lady, always caring about us, not complaining whenever she had to travel around because of my father. She was the best mother someone could’ve asked for. She would’ve liked you.
   - You think so?
   - I know so. Dad would’ve liked you too so would aunt Ida. Of course there’s still my nephews and nieces and their kids, but they don’t really want to speak with me ... - she didn’t need to ask why, she could see it in his eyes why and it made her sad. It made her sad to think of his family not wanting to be with him, specially during the holidays. - But I’ve had Rebecca and Steve for all these years. They’re my family and now I have you.
    - Well, I can’t promise my family will like you but they’ll definitely found the fact I have a boyfriend amusing. 
   - You mean to tell me I don’t have any ex boyfriends I’ll have to fight once we get to London?
   - That’s just unfair, Bucky. You’re a three-time boxing champion. 
   - You’ll never let that one go will you?
   - Nope. Dating a three-time boxing champion is a new identity I can get used to. 
taglist: @disasterbii @lookiamtrying @buckysteveloki-me @americasass81 @jamesbarnesappreciationclub @lostinthebeans @mariahthelioness29 @buckyandsebastian @peaches-roses-sins @theadorasabditory @sipsteacasually @saiyanprincessswanie @booktease21 @noiralei @learisa @everythingisoverratedbutgreat @uglipotata72829 @naturalthrone22 @husherstan @mandiiblanche @vicmc624 @newyorkgoddess @itsallyscorner @chipilerendi @emzd34 @writerwrites @bluevxnus @that-girl-named-alex @captnrogers @nsfwsebbie @sarge-barnes-sir​
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joheunsaram · 3 years
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To Make A Power Couple - 06 (knj)
Chapter 6: Garlic Pasta and I Miss You-s
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THIS IS A REPOST SINCE I LOST ACCESS TO MY OLD ACCOUNT. PLEASE FOLLOW THIS BLOG FOR UPDATES ON THIS SERIES.
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Summary- Namjoon visits his parents and Yoongi and Y/N bond over their past.
word count- 4.5k
pairing- idol!namjoon x ceo!reader
rating- R
genre- series, fluff, angst, action, slightly smutty, strangers2lovers
warnings- drinking, talk of mental health and panic attacks, violence, blood, stalker
a.n- sorry for this chapter being late! i had major burn out this last few weeks but I finally got it out. Tell me what you think!
taglist - @beach-bitch-bitch-beach, @sscheherazadee, @rjsmochii , @jinjccns​ , @joyful-jimin @sideblogger @agustdpeach @diamonddia-mond
“I hate you Kim Namjoon! Get out!”
Namjoon looks at you with an amused smile as he drops his bags at the door of your bedroom. You’re sitting in your bed, your comforter fully around you, even on top of your head, as you loudly blow your nose, some show blaring on the television. Even though he feels bad about passing on his cold to you, he can’t help but find your red nose and whining adorable. The past few months since Namjoon returned from tour had been few of the best you’d had in Korea. Although you both still had remarkably busy schedules, you had found a routine of spending time together at least once a week, usually ending your Saturdays together to spend as much of the Sunday together as possible. It didn’t matter how you spent your time, whether it was spent going out on dates or sitting silently reading or cuddling, all that mattered was that you were together.
“Aw baby, I’m sorry!” He sat on the edge of the bed, wrapping his arms around your burittoed body. He kissed all over your face obnoxiously, much to your chagrin as you groaned and tried to get him off you, worried to get your snot on him. “Okay. Tell you what. I’ll cancel going to my parents and stay here to take care of you!” He punctuated that with another kiss on your lips. Hey, he’d already suffered through this cold, might as well take advantage of being able to be near you now.
“No! Shut up! You’re not cancelling.” Since things were slower at work, the company had decided to give Namjoon and the boys the week off. He had spent the first day with you, going to the most recent Ji Hye Yeom exhibit yesterday, and was going to go visit his family for the next four days. When Namjoon told you he was planning to spend the majority of his vacation with his parents, he was bracing himself for a negative reaction, a learned response from his previous relationship. His ex would always hate that he would visit his family for extended periods when he got time off and wouldn’t prioritize his relationship with her. He was surprised and relieved to hear you not only excited that he was visiting family but encouraging him to spend more time, upping his initial ask of two days to four. He liked that you always encouraged him to call his mom when he was on tour, as did his mom, so much so that she had started to say ‘my beautiful daughter’ whenever she referred to you in front of him.
Namjoon stood up as he watched you rant about the importance of visiting family, one arm out from your duvet heaven as you waved it about to emphasize your points. He almost giggled at how endearing you looked sniffling through your tirade, hair a mess and voice a little hoarse. Taking off his jeans to get comfortable, he chuckled at your wide eyes and dramatic gasp.
“No! We’re not having sex right now you maniac!” You whine as you lie down with the covers over your head. Namjoon gets into bed, pulling the comforter from over you to sneak inside, his arms snaking around your grumbling form to pull him to his chest. Although you complained, you snuggled into him, feeling the safe comfort that only Namjoon provided you.
“I just wanna nap with you before I leave.” He kissed the top of your head as he tangled your legs with his. You poked your head up from where it was hiding in his chest to look up at his smiling face as he cupped your cheek to place a chaste kiss on your lips. Caressing the skin once he leans away, he looks at you adoringly.  “Sorry for getting you sick, baby.”
———————————-
“Your boyfriend is a tyrant. Please never get sick again.” Yoongi took off his beanie and mask and shook his head to fluff his hair as you went through your phone to finish placing the order for takeout. After talking to Namjoon about how you had spent all of yesterday recovering, and even facetiming to ensure him that you were fit enough to be working again, he still didn’t believe you, forcing the only member of his band that was in Seoul during his vacation to make sure you were truly alright. You would be annoyed if your heart didn’t skip a beat at his overt concern. You were glad to spend time with Yoongi - he was pretty similar to you and you both had been slacking on hanging out lately. A few months ago you had decided to host a whiskey exchange where you would share bottles of your favourite liquor together, only for it to fall apart after two hangouts due to your busy schedules and Yoongi’s new relationship. It was nice to be in his company again, his mellow energy a great contrast to your usually loud friends.
“What did he say?” You question, laughing. Yoongi had called Namjoon many funny nicknames before but hearing him call him a tyrant made you laugh, picturing your boyfriend getting stern and demanding someone pay you a visit.
“You wanna see?” Yoongi chuckled as he pulled his phone out, navigating to the group chat and handing it to you. You couldn’t help but smile as you read Namjoon pleading to the group to check in on you, asking if anyone was around. Yoongi said he was around but refused only to relent once the other boys pressured him and Namjoon pulled in a favour Yoongi owed him from 2015.
“Ooof. Honestly, it’s not that bad. Good to know Jungkook would literally kill for me though, and that you hate to hang out with me.” You threw an ice cube at him from where you were putting them in your glasses.
“He wouldn’t. He’s just a suck up.” He dodged your attack, sticking his tongue out in triumph. “And you know I had to make Namjoon suffer a bit.”
Rolling your eyes at him as he smirked, you watched him pull out his bottle from his backpack. Your Craigellachie 16 no match for his Glenfiddich 30, you chastised him for buying such an expensive bottle for just the exchange. However, you were not going to say no to a glass of that and the two of you sat in a comfortable silence as you enjoyed your drinks. You were the first to break the silence.
“How’s your bae?”
“Oh haven’t you heard? Bae is no more! Broke my heart and left me to suffer.” Yoongi scowled as he dramatically grabbed his chest, before downing his drink. If you didn’t know any better you would’ve thought he was joking but his usual deadpan was missing.
“Shit… I’m sorry Yoongs.” You looked at him softly, making him scoff.
“It’s fine. Going to get a sick album out of this.” Yoongi waved you off, as he reached in his backpack again to bring out three bottles of soju. “Let’s get drunk!”
“That’s… one way of looking at things. You want to talk about it?” You knew he didn’t want to talk about it, it was probably still fresh and you didn’t want to impose but you wanted to give him the opportunity to share if he wanted to.
“Nah it’s fine. It was the usual anyways. ‘You’re always busy.’ ‘Why won’t you share your feelings with me?’ ‘Do you love me more or your career?’ I say good riddance.” He scoffed once again as he poured himself some more whiskey, sipping it blissfully.
“Well good to know you’re not hiding your pain.” You narrowed your eyes at him, but decided to get drunk with him anyways, taking up his offer to refill your glass. You had an extremely light day at work tomorrow with it being Friday and all, plus you knew that once Yoongi got drunk he would tell you how he was feeling. He was a very talkative drunk.
“Oh you know it. I’m nothing if not in touch with my feelings!”
Soon you and Yoongi were wasted, sitting on opposite ends of your couch as the television played the ‘important videos’ playlist on Youtube, laughing maniacally at each random short video that popped up. The food you had ordered was sitting on the coffee table, half eaten and getting cold. Having not heard Yoongi’s giggle in a while you looked away from the screen to see him staring into space, a slight frown on his lips.
“Dude. You good?” You poked him with your foot to break him out of his thoughts.
“Yeah. Sorry just realized I’m single again. Fuck.” He looked at you with wide eyes, as if he had just had an epiphany. You frowned at him, sad that he was feeling this way. In the past six months, you had come to learn that although Yoongi often talked about how much he loved being alone, in reality he put a lot of pressure on himself to find someone to be with.
“You know you’re worth more than a relationship, right?” You placed your hand on his, smiling reassuringly.
“Don’t go all Dr. Phil on me. I’m not that sad. It was like two months but it felt nice to call someone mine, you know?” He rolled his eyes at your concern, but held your hand tighter as he finished his sentence, averting his gaze with a melancholic look. He looked at you again sighing. “How did you get over your last breakup?”
“Um… not healthily. I almost sold my company.”
And so for the next hour, you told Yoongi of how messed up your previous relationship had made you. You don’t think you had talked about it in depth about your breakup with Beomseok for years now, but somehow drunk off extremely expensive whiskey and extremely cheap soju it felt natural to share the details about your most toxic relationship with Yoongi. Beomseok and you met when you were initially still in Canada, visiting Seoul in hopes of expanding. You were busy and he tried to help you as you adjusted to a new country, but as your relationship grew so did his tendency to ensure you relied on him. As hard as it was to admit to Yoongi, Beomseok had made you dependent on him, so much so that when he left you after two years of you accommodating him, you broke down. You started having terrible anxiety, using alcohol and cigarettes to take the edge off. Panic attacks became the norm so much so that you had contemplated leaving your position. You couldn’t see your friends, worked from home, and just buried yourself away. It took half a year of self destructive behaviour and for you to wake up in a bed with someone you didn’t remember to knock some sense into you and get yourself into therapy. Yoongi then talked about his own relationship issues, the two of you bonding over your struggles with mental health and shitty coping mechanisms. It was weird to think that Yoongi hadn’t been one of your close friends before this night.
It was around two in the morning by the time Yoongi left and you felt the emotions of the night catch up to you. You hadn’t thought about Beomseok in years, and thinking about him made you feel extremely sad for past you. You didn’t deserve how he treated you and you wished you could go back in time and shake some sense into yourself, and save the heartbreak. Lying in bed, drunk and emotional, you mourned for your old self and her faith in the world. However, looking at your phone you saw the photo of you and Namjoon - him standing behind you with his arm on your shoulder as he pretends to take a bite off your cheek as you grimace - and you were reminded that you were in a much better place now with a much better man. To say you looked forward to Namjoon returning tomorrow would be an understatement.
———————————-
Namjoon: I’m back!!! Namjoon: I miss you!!! Namjoon: Come over!!! Namjoon: I’m cooking for you!!! Y/N: Um… should I call poison control now or later? Namjoon: I’m back after almost a week and this is the welcome I get? Y/N: Babeeeee you know I love you! Namjoon: Prove it. Eat the pasta I’m making Y/N: Did anyone at least help you cook it? Namjoon: IT’S GOING TO BE GOOD. COME OVER. Y/N: Ok ok. No need to yell… Namjoon: Good. See you in an hour? Namjoon: I’m at the dorms btw Y/N: See you soon jooooooonie Y/N: I miss you too btw Namjoon: I love you too btw
You punched the code to the dorm and were greeted by a very excited Moni as you entered. The white dog jumping up at your legs, his tail wagging wildly behind him. You bent down in the entryway to give him a few scratches behind his ears, cooing and calling him a good boy.
“All this love for Moni, what about Joonie? I’m a good boy too!” You heard Namjoon shout out as you made your way through the large living room towards the kitchen, Moni playfully following.
“Aww is my good boy jealous?” You set your eyes on your boyfriend huddled over a cutting board, concentrating hard on cutting what seemed to be garlic, his jaw set. Namjoon was dressed in a blue overalls under which he wore a black sweater, the hood atop his head, the hair of which was now back to his natural dark brown, his nose scrunched as he attempted to keep his glasses from slipping. You don’t know if it was not seeing him for a while or the fact that he looked so cuddly, but you felt butterflies, your stomach somersaulting. You hadn’t felt them since the beginning of your relationship, and you were a bit unnerved that he still had that effect on you six months later.
“Holy shit. You look like a hot minion!” You almost yelled as you walked towards him, startling him enough to look at you with wide eyes under his black rimmed glasses and yelp.
“Don’t scare me like that! I almost cut my hand off!” He tried to glare at you but was soon smiling widely as you ducked under his arm to stand directly in front of him between the counter, putting your arms around his neck as you pulled him into a kiss. It felt amazing to have his plush lips against yours again, his familiar scent enveloping your senses till it felt like you were drunk off of him.
“I missed you,” you whispered against his lips. Your hands found your elbows as you pulled him in closer and deepened the kiss, making him moan, his tongue massaging yours as his hands went to your hips, pulling you to him. Before you could lose all your senses you felt a sharp poke on your lower back, and you reluctantly pulled away to look behind you.
“Joonie! You’re still holding the knife!” You said in alarm as his eyes widened again and he dropped it on the counter immediately before looking at you sheepishly and apologizing. “Control yourself. I don’t want to spend the night in the hospital!”
“Then stop distracting me! Go sit there and watch me make you the best pasta of your life.” He smirked and his eyes followed as you moved around the island to sit at the stool, bending down to pet Moni as he settled at your feet. Namjoon knew he was a terrible cook, but he had spent the time at home perfecting this recipe, subjecting his mom to the first few horrible tries, till he figured it out. It was a simple five ingredient dish but it was the first he’d learn and he’d be lying if he said he didn’t want to impress you. You always cooked for him, from experimental recipes you had found online to traditional Korean food that was second best only to his mom’s, and though he was always happy to do the dishes, he wanted your reunion to be special. He cooked almost quietly, blushing slightly at your words and looks of encouragement, plating it like restaurants would before placing it on the dining table and sitting next to you with a bottle of wine, anticipating your reaction.
“What the fuck? You can cook!” you exclaim as you dig in for another bite. Namjoon lets out a breath he didn’t know he was holding as he grinned at his success, finally digging into his meal. “I love the garlic. But damn, is this your way of telling me you don’t wanna kiss tonight?”
“Baby, I find even your gross morning breath irresistible, a little garlic’s not gonna stop me.” he laughed and you scowled at him, nudging him with your shoulder, as he leaned over to peck your lips. You weren’t trying to placate Namjoon, this pasta was absolutely delicious, the right amount of seasoning and everything. It warmed your heart that despite his firestarter tendencies he went through the effort to make you a home cooked meal.
As you ate, you talked about your days apart. You recovered from your cold within a day and had been back at work, and even though he scolded you for going back too fast Namjoon loved the way your eyes lit up when you talked about how you had managed to renew a contract with a client today, switching the period from their usual 1 year to 5 years. You had been working on this for a whole month, taking it upon yourself to attend meetings with not only the directors of this company but even the interns. He squealed with you at your success, high-fiving you and finding your excitement extremely adorable. You also talked about how after two bottles of soju Yoongi had finally admitted you were now his closest female friend and he agreed that you both should now tease him about it relentlessly.
Namjoon told you about how excited everyone was to have him home for that extended period of time, and how healing it was to be around them after the cacophony of tour. Apparently his sister had recently started learning how to make loom bracelets and he showed off the purple one on his wrist, telling you about how he had a matching one for you in his bag. Namjoon looked refreshed and you were glad you convinced him to spend the extra time home. He had also managed to bring back another bonsai tree to add to his collection, taking the time to explain how in a few years he could potentially tap the mini maple for some syrup. The image of your clumsy boyfriend trying to tap a tiny tree made you laugh. As the conversation continued and you both finished your food, you saw his mood dip a little. You silently lean forward cupping his face, as he nuzzles into your touch.
“My beautiful, hardworking boy. What’s wrong?” You coo with a soft smile on your face as your thumbs stroked his cheekbones and he pouts exaggeratedly before his hands go around your waist pulling you into his lap.
“I missed you.” He whispers as he nuzzles his face in your chest, his arms tightening around you. Namjoon felt cocooned in your sweet floral vanilla scent, and even though he’d been home just this morning, this felt like home too - just being in your embrace. He felt his heart swell with adoration as you stroked his hair slowly, whispering affirmations into his ear, slowly forgetting his worries about not spending enough time with you.
Usually when you both met after being apart, it was all desperation to get naked, but for the first time this felt much more intimate. He could hear your heartbeat and it soothed him. He suddenly envisioned both of you old and weathered in each other’s arms and he couldn’t fight the grin that made it on his face. He showered you in kisses, moving from your chest to your neck to your jaw and finally to your lips, where he stayed, kissing you firmly as his arms wind tighter around your waist. You lost yourself in his touch, wanting nothing more to be consumed by him as you tugged lightly at his hair, swallowing his moans. Before things could escalate you get startled by a loud thud.
“Wow! Right where we eat!” Jimin clicked his tongue in disapproval, as you both sheepishly stared at him.
“Noona!” Jungkook exclaimed as he came over to Namjoon and you, dragging you into a hug as he kissed the top of both of your heads. The two men seemed overly excited, and as Namjoon explained to you how he thought he was alone in the dorms tonight since no one has been around in weeks, the two interrupted to say that they had come to start a movie marathon, hoping to stay up all night since they had the day off tomorrow to marathon the Batman franchise as they had a bet going on as which one was the best.
“Do you guys want to join us?” Jimin asked politely as he munched on leftover pasta on the table. You excitedly opened your mouth to speak but before you could get a word out, Namjoon looked at you sternly.
“Nope.” He refused the boys as he looked at you, leaning in close to whisper in your ear before he nipped at it. “Baby, ignore your obsession with Batman. I want my dessert.” His voice was a few octaves lower than usual and his words made you shiver, a blush creeping up your face as a nervous giggle escaped your lips. Maybe you could skip rewatching these old movies, just once.
Bidding a quick goodbye to the boys and ignoring their smirks, you both made your way to Namjoon’s room. As soon as you were out of sight, Namjoon pulled you into another kiss, slotting your lower lip between his, making your heart race as he walked you down the hallway towards his room. You almost tripped over his bags haphazardly strewn in front of his door.
“Sorry, didn’t have time to go to my room yet.” He chuckled against your lips as his grip on your hips stabilized you. You giggled as you turned around to open his door, his lips on your neck instantaneously as he rubbed his growing bulge against your butt. His touch had you breathless as you moved in his room, Moni following closely behind you. Removing himself from you he picked up his dog and moved him outside murmuring an apology to the whining canine as he shut the door.
Without wasting any time, he pinned you against the door, your makeout session getting heavy. Your eyes were screwed shut as you mewled, his lips along your neck igniting a fire in you. Your hands moved from his hair to the buckles of his overalls, snapping them off as they fell to the ground unceremoniously. “Oh look! Easy access!” you exclaimed as he smiled against your skin.
His lips met yours again, his hands kneading the flesh of your sides under your shirt. You could kiss him like this forever, the way his tongue explores your mouth as if he doesn’t already know every crevice of your body, as if he’s worshipping you. His kiss slows down, turning from a sloppy fiery heat to intentional moves made to make you moan as he moves you towards the bed, dropping you to the middle as soon as your knees hit the back of the bed. He stands above you removing his shirt with one hand as you move backwards and soon he’s slotting himself between you.
“Fuck I love you.” He whispers as he kisses your cheek, moving towards your ear. You moan loudly as he grinds against you. Your hands run over his back, feeling the muscles as he continues to kiss your neck, biting it before soothing it with wide licks of his tongue. You used to be embarrassed by the marks he left behind but somehow as time passed you craved them. Jiyoung had even nicknamed him your vampire, and you’d be lying if that didn’t make you giddy.
Realizing you were still fully dressed you pushed at his chest, making him lie next to you as you straddled him, one of your knees almost slipping off the edge of the bed. You giggle at your clumsiness as he holds your hips to steady you and you slowly unbutton your shirt. As your skin becomes visible he runs his hands up your stomach to your chest, squeezing each breast as he reaches your neck before pulling your face to his.
“Mhmm… my pretty girl.” He almost growls as he pulls you into another heated kiss, his hands cupping your face as you grind on him. Suddenly you feel a tug at your hair, making you moan into his mouth, breaking the kiss. Before you know it you are on the floor, laughing at your clumsiness as you see his confused face, eyes still closed, lips puckered.
However, your laughter dies as you hear a loud screech. That’s when you feel that your hair was still being tugged as you looked up to see a tall, bulky woman, probably in her late thirties calling you a slut. Before you can even register what is happening you feel a sharp pain across your face as you realize you’ve just been punched. You taste the iron before you notice drops of bright red on your chest.
You cup your nose with one hand as you hear chaos ensue. Namjoon yelling your name as Moni barks loudly outside the room. You are aware that you are still lying on the floor but your eyes refuse to open as you hear scuffling before the door being slammed and Jungkook���s voice.
Everything’s a blur and you hear a loud blood curdling scream. Before you can register that that noise came from your mouth you hear your arm snap just as the most pain you have ever felt in your life turns your arm numb. You don’t remember much after, only grunts and shouts of your name. The last thing you hear is Namjoon’s voice calling your name repeatedly as he holds your head.
——
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charming-2d-boys · 3 years
Note
36, 29, 12 for feitan please 😼
An abundance of Feitan requests ♥️
Thank you for requesting! 🙇
12. “Give me attention.”
29. “How is my wife more badass than me?”
36. “That was kind of hot.”
A/N: I’m extremely sorry for not posting and being so absent, it’s exam period here right now until the end of January and things are hectic and confusing also on the verge of dropping out 🙃
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   If anyone would’ve asked you how you’d managed to reach this point, married and with a kid already, you weren’t sure about what you’d answer. How could you tell them that you were married to one of the most ruthless members of the Phantom Troupe? Or that you got married a few years after meeting and dating? And that right now, you were at an amusement park, both of you watching as your little boy was running around, looking at all of the people dressed up as characters and all the rides and sweets available? Yeah, you didn’t know how you’d be able to explain, but you didn’t need to. Nor did you really want to. Feitan’s lack of care for what others thought about you was probably rubbing off on you.
   “Be careful!” You said loudly, hoping your son would listen and won’t run off, out of your sight, or trip. Though you had a feeling that if it did happen, Feitan would be fast enough to catch him. Luckily, the park wasn’t so crowded, so you could see him pretty well. A few seconds later, your kid came back, smiling widely as he came between you and your husband, holding onto both of your hands as he tugged you after him, rambling about wanting to go and hug one of his favourite mascots. Both you and Feitan smiled at his enthusiasm and let yourselves be tugged. You soon saw one of his favourite TV show characters, taking pictures with various other kids while your son was bouncing up and down as he looked up at you with a pleading gaze.
   “Wait for your turn and be polite when you ask them, okay?” You didn’t really think he’d do otherwise, but it was good to remind him since he seemed so enthusiastic. Your son only nodded before you both waited for his turn to come. When he went up to the mascot and you heard him politely ask for a hug and a picture, you couldn’t be more proud to be one of his parents.
   That was how you spent the day - your son’s birthday, to be more precise. Going to different characters to take photos, eating, going on the appropriate rides for his age, buying souvenirs... Even Feitan came with you, even if his expression was pretty sour. He didn’t really enjoy such childish activities, but he was willing to put up with it for the day. Truth be told, if his son came to him to play, he hardly ever refused, he was that whipped.
   Even as you were opening the door while holding a bag full of souvenirs you’d acquired, you could see Feitan holding your son on his back. He had fallen asleep on the way home, tired from running around and eating to his heart’s content. You just had to take a photo, it was too cute to not do it. Feitan grumbled when he saw you smile at your phone, moving to your son’s bedroom to put him to bed. You arranged everything you’d bought before changing into more comfortable clothes and heating some leftovers from the day before for you and Feitan to snack on. When he came back, also dressed in his home clothes, he sat down next to you and took some food while you looked through the photos you’d taken the whole day. The smile on your face made Feitan happy, knowing that all of you had had fun.
   Well, that pretty much ended when you only continued browsing the photos, occasionally eating. Now that your son was asleep, Feitan wanted to spend some well-deserved alone time with you and wanted all your attention to be on him.
   “Give me attention.” You spared him a glance, smiling before you cuddled up to him, also showing him the photos you’d taken. Feitan could’ve taken your phone and put it away, but seeing those pictures with you and having you close was a good compromise as well.
   The memories of the day were still fresh in your mind, but seeing the photos, you discovered different things that you hadn’t noticed at that time: unflattering expressions; a baby curiously looking at the camera, probably curious about the coloured accessory tide to the phone; a brother and a sister shoving ice cream and fairy floss at each other’s faces. Some of them were honestly funny and others just plain weird, but it was all in good fun and you hoped to develop them and make another photo album. Feitan loved showing some of the photos to the Spiders when they asked him or you. After all, your son was also considered someone close to the Phantom Troupe and would be protected at all times, no matter what.
   “Look at this one, Fei!” You laughed, showing him a photo of you and your son. You were holding your kid, who was laughing and having the time of his life, behind you while you had a toy sword - that he’d wanted - towards a dragon mascot, whose hands were up in the air as a sign of surrendering to you. Feitan snorted.
   “How is my wife more badass than me? Protecting our son while I was just a background character.” He tutted, shaking his head as an arm went from your shoulders to around your waist, pulling you in.
   “Well, daddy was busy buying us drinks, which is why I had to ask another mascot to do this for us. But don’t worry, I’ll protect you as well if I have to.” You smirked and he snorted again, pinching your side in retaliation. He could protect himself and the two of you just fine.
   “Still, that was kind of hot.” Feitan knew how you could be when you were truly mad and though he found it sort of funny and attractive, he always thanked whatever was up there when it wasn’t directed at him. It rarely happened, but still. Watching others be on the receiving end of your anger was always entertaining. And anyway, if anyone had a problem with you or his kid or even him, they’d soon realise that they’d made a huge mistake. After all, he vowed to take care of his family.
   “Look at this one, isn’t it cute? I’ll print it and put it on the wall.”
   “No way.”
   “Yes way. Our son is the cutest and he definitely took after you. Look at his cheeks!” The photo in question was the last one you took. Your son’s cheek was squished against Feitan’s shoulder, as his arms were dangling on each side and he was being carefully held, while Feitan was smiling lightly, an absolutely enamoured look in his eyes as he caught sight of his son’s face so close to his. A true father-son moment. “I can’t wait to show this one to the others!” You were too enthusiastic, but Feitan wouldn’t have it any other way.
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kylosupremeimagines · 4 years
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Clyde Logan A-Z Fluff
(Special thanks to @driversmutbucket​ for helping me with this!) 
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A = affection (how affectionate are they in day to day life? Do they show affection publicly or keep that more in private?) Pet names, oh god, the amount of pet names that man has for you. At the beginning of your relationship you actually thought he had forgotten your name. Darling, sweetheart, baby, doll, sweetness, sweetie, honey, precious, angel, pumpkin, sweet pea....etc Clyde Logan is one affectionate teddy bear. He is so sweet with you that he gets teased about it by his friends and family- Jimmy often pretends to vomit. In public he makes it know that you are his woman.
B = best memory (what is the best memory they have with you) Even if it’s a little cheesy, one of his best memories would be his first date with you, no matter how long he knew you beforehand. It shows that you have an interest in being more than just friends with him and gives him hope for a future family. He will remember even the smallest of details such as which way your hair is parted.
C = cat or dog person (this is pretty obvious) Dog, he loves their loyalty and unwavering affection,  although he doesn’t have one of his own, he would love to have one eventually. It would be comforting to know you had a protector when he was working long nights at the bar.
D = dreams (what do they want to do in life?) It is simple, really. A big family. With you.
E = evenings (how do they spend their evening? So they go out? Do they read?) If he isn’t working, Clyde loves having dinner with you, then snuggling up on the sofa with you and reading. Enjoying the peace and just being with you.
F = first date (what was it like?) He wanted to do something extremely special so he brought you out to a lake, planning a cute little picnic. There wasn’t really anyone else around and he brought your favorite foods, so it was perfect.  He even brought some wine, but wouldn’t make you drink it if you’re not a fan or don’t drink alcohol. He manages to kiss you, and stars was it the most loving kiss you could ever share with someone.
G = giggle (what is their laugh like? What makes them laugh?) He’ll laugh at just about any hilarious thing someone does, and certainly shows his teeth in that wide, amazing grin of his. His laugh sounds genuine to his entertainment, coming deep from the chest.
H = hugs (do they like hug? What kind of hugs do the give?) Clyde Logan is a goddamn teddy bear. He gives the best hugs. Warm, firm and enveloping. He loves cuddling you, he could all day. Sometimes he does. He isn’t particularly cuddly with other people, being a bit shy. You know once he has babies of his own he will hardly put them down due to all the cuddles he will be giving.
I = instrument (do they play an instrument?) Considering that he only has one hand, he can’t exactly play any instruments. But if he used to play, it most likely would’ve been an acoustic guitar. Though now he still can sing pretty decently.
J = joy (what brings them joy in life?) Family. It’s all he really needs to be happy in life. He would give every ounce of love to his family to the point some people believe it’s a bit excessive. However he would not care about their opinion as his family and the ability to love them gives him more joy in life than he knows what to do with.
K = kisses (what kind of kisser are they? Shy? Passionate?) Clyde can be quite the mix with his kisses. Usually he will be loving with them, not afraid to show you physical affection. He’ll run his thumb over your cheek as he leans down to deepen it, lips dancing passionately against yours. He loves that one second yet meaningful good morning kiss.
L = love (how do they act when they have a crush) Jimmy once referred to it as “love drunk”. When he met you he was completely distracted, couldn’t think of anything else but you, and he told you as much. He would mess up drinks at work- something he never did, trip over his own feet when he saw you and be unable to form sentences.
“My brother is damn love drunk on ya y/n, it’s like aliens have removed half his brain.” Jimmy Logan
M = memory (what’s their favourite memory?) Over your time together, his favorite will end up being your wedding day. It symbolizes that you truly will spend the rest of your lives together. And it would make one great day. Imagine the sex that night with Clyde 😉
N = no (what is their pet peeve?) Clyde likes  to know where you are and that you are safe. He hates it when you don’t let him know your plans, or don’t answer your phone or reply to his messages. He will work himself into a state, thinking the Logan curse has struck again if you don’t get in touch in a timely manner.
O = occupation (what’s their dream job?) To be a father. That’s the ultimate for Clyde. He is happy running Duck Tape, and doesn’t yearn for anything beyond that in his career but being a father? Dream job.
P = parent (what kind of parent would they be?) An absolute bloody pushover. He will spoil his kids rotten, shower them in love and affection and let them know they are goddamn miracles to him. Clyde will be the kind of dad that has your children’s friends wishing he was their dad. Your place will always be filled with your children’s friends, noisy and happy.
Q = questions (do they believe in the super natural? Aliens? Anything along those lines) He isn’t too sure what to believe but considering he’s a firm believer in the so called Logan Family Curse, it’s probably safe to say that he does believe in something. He gave into the old ghost stories his siblings would tell him as a kid and it would scare him shitless. He refuses to deny the existence of some intelligent life out there in space. And the list goes on.
R = romantic (are they romantic during the relationship?) Clyde May doubt how well he can express his love, but sometimes he can do so without even trying. You can see the love in his every action, ever facial expression, every gesture. He will remind you how much he cares and do little things for you. Although sometimes it’s with advice from Mellie, he plans the best dates for you. And man the list goes on.
S = smile (what makes them smile without fail) You. It doesn’t matter if he’s physically with you or you pop into his thoughts, you will make him smile each time without fail. Overall his family will do the same as it’s the most important thing to him.
T = together (how clingy are they? How long do you two spend together per day on average) Clyde adores you beyond belief but he knows how to keep his boundaries. He wants to be around you as often as he can but knows when to back off. It’s not like he can’t handle being away from you as long as he knows that you’re doing alright and are safe.
U = unbearable (what habit do they have that’s unbearable? What habit do you have that they find unbearable) Clyde has the tendency to pay more attention to how others are doing before he checks in with himself. He asks you a lot how you’re doing, sometimes to the point where it’s a few times an hour. It can leave you to worry about him when he’s neglecting himself.
V = videos (do they take lots of videos or photos during your relationship?) Opposes to video, he’s more likely to take photos. Why why put together a whole photo album that you can look back on years down the road and reminisce about your life together with the family?
W = wedding (what was the wedding like?) The wedding would more than likely be out in the woods right by the family’s cabin. All your friends and family would be there, Little Sadie would be the flower girl, and Clyde would be more handsome in that suit than he’s ever been. Overall it would be a great time, and you’d even be able to stay at the cabin for your honeymoon if you wanted. Though, he will feel a little off not having the ring on the traditional finger so you two decided that you too would wear yours on your right ring finger.
X = eXtra (what’s an interesting fact about them that they don’t tell anyone about?) Not that it should be anything for him to be embarrassed about, but he has a huge soft spot for animals. He had a dog he adored in his childhood, and a lot of other pets that came in and out of his family’s lives. He wouldn’t be opposed to having a few animals with you; though he wants to get at least one dog.
Y = yuck (what do they hate? Could be a food, sent, word anything) Other men perving on his woman. RIP them, cause he will go straight up feral on their ass.
Z = zzzz (how heavy of a sleeper are they? How do they sleep? What mood do they wake up in? Really any sleeping headcanons) Clyde is always happy to wake up when you are in his bed. He loves those slow lazy mornings where you cuddle and  make love lazily. His sleeping is a bit all over the place. Sometimes he sleeps incredibly heavily, other times restlessly, especially if you aren’t there. He still has occasional PTSD nightmares from his service. Luckily they are becoming less frequent.
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yeocult · 4 years
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lover’s guide | s.mg
genre: fluff, slight ansgt, college au
wc: 4.2k words
synopsis: 5 steps to love by song mingi
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step one: being noticed
“mingi, are you even listening?” the male jolted up at the sudden call of his name from his professors, earning a few stares from his classmates.
“um y-yes.” he mentally slapped himself for stuttering. mingi sighed and closed his eyes, desperately trying to kill off the feeling that welcomed itself into his mind.
just a few days earlier, during lectures when he laid his eyes on you. he thought it was maybe admiration at first. you were one of the top students of the class and the way you carried yourself with such grace was so attractive to him. your range of style was captivating, each day came with a new outfit. he liked the way you were confident and also was experimenting with different styles. not to mention you killed every look.
the sudden attraction seems like one of those middle school crushes that he could get over within three days, maximum. but even after three days, he didn’t. he couldn’t stop himself from staring at you from across the room and he often caught himself thinking about you.
he would use every chance he got to interact with you, although he couldn’t say he was the best at it. he knew that small smiles whenever you two pass in the halls or that silently complementing your choice of accessories was not enough for you to get the hint of his crush on you. but he did it anyway.
today was nothing new. mingi found himself stealing glances at you once in a while, especially since lectures were long and he rather had his focus somewhere else than some boring discussion about costume history from the professor’s monotone voice.
“mingi can you be any more obvious? if i was them, i could feel you basically staring into my soul from across the room.” his friend whispered leaning closer to mingi to avoid making a scene. mingi scoffs and wooyoung earned an elbow to his side. “don’t word it like that…” mingi fixes his eyes on the professor to avoid getting called on again, “is it that bad?” he quietly asked and wooyoung nodded.
the boring lectures came to an end and granted him a long desired freedom. since it was his final class for the day, he was free to go home and take that nap he craved for. wooyoung was long gone with yeosang as they walked out of the room together, while mingi was a rather bit slower when packing his supplies.
it wasn’t until you came up to him that he felt his whole body freeze. his insides were jumping and he didn’t know if it was from excitement or nervousness, probably both. you held onto your tote bag with one hand while the other was playing with the hem of your shirt as you approached the tall male.
“hey mingi!” you happily greeted him and mingi mirrored your smile and waved back at you. your smile was continuous, how could he not smile back even if he looked like a huge idiot. 
“i really like your style. you always stand out,” you paused for a moment realizing how that sounded. “you dress really well, um your style is different from others, i like it.” you added for clarifications, not wanting to sound impolite or anything in that manner.
within less than a minute, you manage to make mingi do cartwheels in his head and the happiest man alive. “o-oh thank you! i actually made this shirt myself. it didn’t turn out well so i just wear it casually—sometimes even to bed…” he trailed off. “thank you, uh i really like your earrings, by the way, they’re pretty.” he tells you. mingi wanted to evaporate right now after so much he just stuttered and rambled right in front of you. he shyly scratched his nape, hoping his nervousness didn’t make the air awkward.
your soft giggles filled the lecture room as you thanked him. then you waved cheerfully and made your way towards the exit, leaving mingi there stunned. you noticed him and that was all mingi needed to know he was in love.
step two: being friends
mingi has been falling asleep with a soft smile and waking up with full energy the past week. because ever since you interacted with him, you two have grown closer. he felt more comfortable and less shy around you. the short greetings have turned into telling each other how his days went and him listening to you praise the new album your favourite group released. the two of you would walk to the bus station together after the bell rings, spending lunch breaks together, and facetime once in a while.
he learned a lot about you during the period he started to hang out with you more. mingi took note that you often wore dangly earrings over studs and that you like to eat strawberries to fuel your body during study sessions. he also learned that you went into fashion major simply for the interest and passion of it, he admired you for that. mingi likes to think that your jewelry choices match you fairly well; bright and attractive.
the two of you have been spending lunch breaks together. during those times, you noticed that mingi is a slow eater and he told you he also makes music with one of his friends, hongjoong, who was a year older than him. you noticed his little habits of laughing with his whole body. throwing his head back and sometimes clapping his hand in amusement. although he might come off intimidating or cold to some people, mingi is definitely the most wholesome person you’ve come across and you still can’t wrap your head around his duality.
you two would sit at the bus station waiting for your ride home. mingi’s place was within walking distance but he insisted on waiting with you. after all, it was a perfect opportunity to spend more time with you. and if there’s anything mingi likes more than you, is spending time with you.
the both of you were browsing your phones while waiting for your bus to arrive. getting bored with the lack of notifications on his phone, mingi leaned in to glance at your phone screen.
“you like cats?” mingi asked you as the both of you watch some fluffy cat video on your instagram feed. you shifted your phone for the better view for him and nodded. 
“they’re just so cute, right?” mingi hummed in response. he held back on telling you that he thought you were way cuter than the cats, but decided to save it for another time. you proceed to tell him that your mother is allergic plus that you probably wouldn’t have much time to take care of a pet being in college and all that. he watched your eyes filled with glitter as you continue to watch more cat videos on your screen.
the bus finally arrived and you quickly stood up. it saddens him a little that he couldn’t watch you become all smiley over cats.
“thanks for waiting with me again, mingi. i’ll see you tomorrow.” you gave him a quick hug from the side and softly smiled at him. silently hoping your swift  action wasn’t weird or sudden to him, because you really were appreciating the little things mingi does for you. including companying you while your bus arrives. 
mingi softly smiled at you. “anytime.” he kept his response short because knowing himself, he wouldn’t know how to speak normally with stutters and rambling if he continued.
he tried to cover up the fact that he’s blushing like a fool right now and his heart is beating extremely fast over a simple and quick hug. didn’t go very well as mingi stood there with his cheeks painted a crimson colour and heat rushes throughout his body. a damn hug. you simply warped your arms around his figure and made your way towards the bus like nothing had happened. like you hadn’t made mingi the happiest person alive.
overtime, mingi was proud to call you his close friend. even though that wasn’t what he exactly hoped for, he hoped for a little more actually. but at the end of the day, he was happy nonetheless to have you with him.
step three: first date
today’s a special day, making you want to doll yourself up more than usual. “is this too much?” you’ll never admit it out loud but being around mingi made you feel a bit timid and shy. the total opposite of how people view you, bold and charming.
you weren’t the type to care about what others thought about you. after all, fashion was how you expressed yourself and you didn’t limit yourself to one style. if you felt like adding one more hair clip to your hair, then who’s gonna stop you? on days when you’ve lost your confidence, mingi would be the first person to compliment you. and that was all it took for you to truly appreciate yourself.
“w-what? no! you look amazing, you always do.” mingi pointed out how your nail polish matches your hair clips and you felt at ease, your body loses its stiffness and you softly smile at his compliment.
mingi on the other hand, felt like he was always overdressing. maybe choose something a little more simple? tone down with the colours? those types of thoughts kept mingi from truly playing around with his wardrobe. he admitted, he was insecure. that all changed when he started to hang out with you. your confidence brushing on him made him careless about what others might think of him. he started layering jewellery and wearing that flashy jacket because he can. you had noticed your little influence on him and you loved that for him.
“you don’t look too bad yourself.” you helped mingi break from his shell and gain confidence, mingi made you feel comfortable in your own skin.
the bell chimed at your entrance. your eyes light up at the environment. the welcome scent of coffee wafts through the air and the soft melody playing in the background automatically brings joy to your face. you’ve never been to a cat cafe before, seeing this amount of cute cats casually walking around has added ten years to your life. mingi and you settled to a small table by the window with a few cats already sitting there on the shelf. the sun shined through the glass, warming up the seat and table. while you busy yourself with your new furry buddy, mingi left to order a few drinks and dessert for the both of you.
as he waited in line, he thought about how lucky he was to even be here with you right now.
“so…” mingi takes a break from drawing figures on his sketchbook and meets your face. you hummed and pulled your laptop screen lower so you can see his face. the two of you were studying together in the library, helping each other in various topics covered in today’s lessons. mingi was always grateful that your schedules line up with his. meaning all of his breaks, he can spend time with you since you were off as well. and since you were both fashion majors, it only made sense if you both helped each other out.
“i have a friend, he works at this cat cafe and i was wondering…” pause. his eyes lowered at his hands fidgeting with his pen. “if you wanted to go with me tomorrow?” he continued but couldn’t help to lower his voice almost to a whisper as he shyly asked you out. he knew how much you loved cats and thought it was a perfect idea to take you to visit the cafe one day.
your face immediately lights up at the idea of a cat cafe. “mingi are you serious? i would love to!” you send him a big toothy grin as you were so excited to be able to go with him. “it’s a date then!”
mingi swore his heart stopped beating and his nose forgot how to breathe for a second at your words.
“you’re deep in love aren’t you prince charming?” his friend from behind the counter teased. san grinned at mingi while typing in his order into the machine. it seem like wooyoung had already told san about mingi’s little secret.
he rolled his eyes, as if he doesn’t get ridiculed enough from wooyoung and yeosang in class already. “and what about it?” mingi scoffs, pulling out a couple bills and handed them to san. 
luckily for him, you weren’t around to hear it. although parts of him wished you could hear what just san said because he doesn't know how long he can control his feelings anymore. but mingi wanted his confession to be a bit more romantic rather than his friend blurting it out, so he kept quiet and waited. you were currently occupied with your phone, filling up your photo gallery with pictures of them while waiting for mingi to order.
“it means you should probably do something about it.” san winked, handing mingi his receipt before heading back to prepare his drinks. mingi knew exactly what he meant about that. he knew exactly what he should do about these uncontrollable feelings. but he just couldn’t find the courage to do it anytime soon.
he sighed and glanced towards the table where you sat. he was really glad he brought up the idea of bringing you here because mingi realized how endearing your love for cats was. even from afar, the way you gently pet the cat by the window makes his heart melt. no complaints from him though. if they can make you smile non-stop, then that’s all it matters.
“order up for lover boy.” san announced playfully, snapping mingi out of his thoughts of you and bringing him back from reality. mingi rolled his eyes and blatantly ignored his friend’s word, taking the tray of food in his hand. hearing san giggle from behind him only made him more annoyed but he quickly calmed down at the sight of you playing with a cat’s paw.
“hey. i got your favourites.” he placed the tray in the middle. you thanked him as you took a bite into your strawberry shortcake and a sip from the iced americano. you felt butterflies in your stomach, you couldn’t help but to feel this way towards mingi because he never fails to remember all the little things you’ve told him.
the two of you enjoyed your drinks and desserts and talked about anything that came to your mind. mingi was an easy person to talk to. no matter what you talked about or how long you would ramble on a topic, he was listening to every single word that came out of your mouth. sometimes you would carry the whole conversation and he didn’t mind. and neither did you because something about not worrying or stressing over if you were being boring or annoying was what made you love talking to mingi. your voice was like music to him, he could listen to it all day long. he propped his chin on his hand as you continued to talk.
you jump up slightly at the furry feeling the side of your leg. you melt at the sight of a persian cat making figure eights around your legs. another kitten nearby was on its back, all sprawled out. you both were in awe at the sight of all these cute cats around the place. while you fixed your gaze on the cats, mingi had his eyes focused on you the entire time.
step four: confession
everything was going fine. until it wasn’t.
self-doubts and anxiety starts creeping in and you feel weak. you were unsure, because nothing good has ever lasted this long. you had no idea this would happen when approached mingi. but after that day, you found yourself looking forward to talking with him more. and over time, of course, you fell for him. who wouldn’t?
it felt odd. suspicious. everything was going so smoothly with you and mingi. he makes you feel excited to wake up every day and spend your breaks with him. he makes classes and college a little more bearable. you love the way he unconsciously caress your hand under the table like it’s a habit. you love the little things he does for you like sharing earbuds while waiting for your bus. mingi was an angel towards you.
it was too good to be true.
you were hidden underneath your blanket in a fetal position, curled up with your knee to your chest as you quietly sobbed in your room. you felt terrible. how you’ve been avoiding mingi recently ever since this unsettling feeling started to creep in. you tried to bury your whimpers and sniffs as you heard your door creak open and felt the bed dip.
“hey.” no response. he couldn’t see your face. the only thing he could hear was the shaky breath that you tried so hard to hide from underneath the covers. he could tell you’ve been crying for the past hour or even days considering your current state.
“leave me alone,” you snapped at him. mingi pursed his lips at your jarring words, deciding to push it away because he knew you didn’t mean any harm.
he’s noticed, he always does. today is sunday, he hasn't seen or heard from you ever since friday afternoon. even so, you disappeared right after classes ended and he couldn’t get a hold of you. you weren’t at the bus stop as you normally would, it had mingi worried to death. he started to think about his past actions or words to see if any of that had made you upset, but none came to his mind. opting to just stay by your side for now.
“i haven’t seen you in so long, is everything okay?” he asked but got no response. the lump in your throat prevents you from telling the truth, so you kept quiet. you could only shake your head from underneath the covers.
“i’m here for you, i don’t want you to go through this alone.” mingi took a deep breath. he didn’t like seeing you like this. he settled on the bed right next to your figure, you flinched at his touch when he patted your shoulders gently. he didn’t say a word, he allowed you to continue crying, letting out any pain that has been trapped in there. 
and with that, you slowly pulled the covers down. revealing your glossy eyes and puffy lips from the endless hours of crying in your room.
mingi quickly took you into his embrace because he just couldn’t stand the sight of you crying. he’s been dying to hold you. he tells you that everything is okay to be okay and that it’s okay to cry. maybe silence was the best medicine for now, but he felt the urge to tell you that things were going to be okay. he lets you cry in his arms, allowing you to break down as he rubs your back. you buried your face into the warmth of his chest as he held the back of your head and rubbed your back. soft whispers from mingi calmed you down, you focused your mind on his smooth voice to escape the unsettling thoughts that welcomed itself into you.
you pushed yourself off him and took a shaky deep breath, it sounds like you were going to break and tears would storm down your cheeks again but you quickly collected yourself.
“i’m sorry.” you whispered, wiping your face with the back of your hand. you didn’t know what to do now. tell him? or make up an excuse on why you’ve been down lately? tell him that you were afraid that he would leave you? or push off the topic and hope that he’ll buy it?
you played with your hands as you sat there helpless in front of him, until mingi’s voice broke your racing thoughts. “it’s okay. take your time.” he took both your hands in his, caressing your hand with his thumb gently, like he always does. holding them like you were going to disappear any moment now, leaving him alone.
a comfortable silence falls between you and mingi as you both sit on your bed holding each other's hands. until you blurted out the words you’ve been holding back, words you’ve been thinking over and over.
“i love you.”
mingi froze at your sudden confession. releasing his grip on your hands and his eyes widened. he felt like his heart was about to explode. the fluttering in his stomach, feeling hesitant of what to say back because he was definitely not expecting this so suddenly. 
“i…” he began, unsure of how to properly explain the complexity of his feelings, “i love you too, ever since i laid my eyes on you.” chuckling at himself at how cheesy he sounded. unashamed of how stupidity in love he sounds right now, because letting you know how important you are to him was his goal.
giggling at how adorable he looks when he proposed his feelings, loving how he can make you smile despite you being a mess just a couple of minutes ago. loving how being here with you, makes you forget all about those negative thoughts. you took his hands into yours once again. a wave of relief washes you over because now. you didn’t have to worry about anything anymore, not when he’s by your side.
“it’s just…” you drop your head down at his hands as you play with his fingers, “nothing this good as happened to me and i just…” you trail off, feeling the tears in the corner of your eyes coming back. just afraid of you leaving me, was what you wanted to say but couldn’t. mingi notices and instantly intertwines his hands with yours.
“hey, it’s okay. i’m going anywhere, okay?” he reassures you, like he was reading your thoughts. lifting up his hand intertwined with yours to your eye level as his little proof. his action didn’t fail to make you smile.
“thank you, mingi. for being with me.”
“like i said, i’m always here for you. now c’mere.” opening his arms wide with a huge grin plastered on his face as an invitation for you to melt in his arm. you hurled in his arms.. finding solace in the crook of his neck, feeling his warmth and taking in his scent. 
the room was filled with little sniffles from you, sounding like a toddler who’s favourite toy went missing. “sorry for getting my snot on your shirt.” you shyly chuckled for ruining the slightly romantic atmosphere.
“it’s okay, only because i love you.” if hugs healed, mingi would hold you forever.
step five: being a couple
“close your eyes for me?”
“don’t tell me what to do.”
“you—” mingi sighed. “just do it, please.”
“okay, only because you said the magic word.” you quipped with a smirk.
mingi scoffed. when you shut your eyes, he leads you in front of the mirror. he pulled out the handmade necklace he’s been working on the past couple of days. his hands, unlike the rest of his body, were cold. he carefully brushed your hair out of the way then carefully clipped the two ends of the necklace together. turning them to the front and letting them sit on your collarbones.
it was a simple gold chain with a charm, representing you. he was aiming for a piece you would be able to wear casually, fitting with everyday outfits as well as complementing your other jewelry pieces since he knew you liked to layer them.
with anticipation, you asked if you can open your eyes, mingi hum a tune in response. “i got you a little something, i hope you like it.” slowly opening your eyes to reveal mingi’s gift. heat crawling up your face when your eyes laid on the beautiful piece of gold jewelry resting around your neck. there laid a charm, a key.
“baby…” you gazed at your new favourite jewellery while trying to hold back tears. getting on your tippy-toes, reaching for his cheeks to give him a quick “thank you” kiss.
mingi flashed you a huge satisfied grin, “ta-da! we’re matching!” he pulled his own necklace that was hidden under his shirt with the brightest smile on his face, the type of smile that turned his eyes into crescents. instead of a key, his was a lock. you were in awe at the connection and how thoughtful it was.
“thank you mingi, i love it so much.” you wasted no time wrapping your arms around his neck and a quick peck on his cheeks that made his heart burst into a million pieces.
in a short amount of time, you two managed to brighten each other’s day effortlessly. mingi has never been so wrong about his little crush on you lasting three days. even though it was silly, he thanked himself every day for choosing to wear that shirt. who knew something he put so little thought into could turn to be the best thing that’s happened to him? he was so proud to be in love with such an incredible person. a love he would cherish for life.
“thank you for loving me.”
-
happy birthday to the best boy, song mingi <3
148 notes · View notes
smileyjaeminies · 4 years
Text
Hey, stranger
Synopsis: You are preparing to say goodbye to uni life and take a leap of faith into the unknown. What happens when you are met with an unexpected visitor? Decisions are tricky… Will you be able to make the right one?
Word Count:  7,5 k
Genre: ex- boyfriend au!, angst
Warnings: smoking, drinking, fighting, cursing
Member: Jungkook, ft Namjoon and Lisa from BlackPink
A/N: This took every last cell of my energy to write. I think a part of me will live within this work. Say hello to my new favourite piece.
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  If life was full of crossroads, you could clearly see the one waiting for you only a few steps away. Could the butterfly effect be true? Could every single choice you make drastically change the outcome of every day ahead of you? How could you ever be sure a decision was right?
  Could you trust your heart? Or would it always lie to you? Your head? Or would it force a decision on you? Could you take a friend’s advice? Would it be right to listen to someone else when the result only concerns yourself?
  Still lost in thought, you pry open your window slowly as to not make any sound. You take your legs out first, climbing on the steps of the narrow fire escape. It creaks under your weight, a familiar and almost comforting sound. You squeeze the cup of tea in your hand, hoping that its heat will seep into your fingers. A wisp of air makes you shiver, your teeth threatening to clatter together.
  You shouldn’t be out. You are dressed in your home clothes, leggings and an old oversized hoodie, not nearly enough to save you from the cold air outside. Yet you don’t mind, allowing the cold to surround you as you wrap a blanket around your shoulders.
  You glance back inside, your room in complete disarray. A big suitcase is sitting opened in front of your closet, filled to the brim. Everywhere around your room are opened boxes, some of them half empty, others overflowing with your possessions. The walls seem empty as the fairy lights that used to decorate them are packed in one of the boxes. The collage of pictures that accompanied them is now stored in an album.
  You reach for it, getting comfortable on the fire escape again as you shuffle through it. The smile on your face only keeps growing as the memories come back to you. Your first day in uni, your first dorm, countless pictures of you and your roommate, Lisa, from various adventures from 3am liquor runs to stressing over exams.
 With every picture, you see the passage of time. How you moved out of the dorms and into your first apartment, your first day at your shitty part time job to pay rent. You and your friends’ first time at karaoke night, only for it to become tradition. Beach days and hikes, laughs and crying sessions.
  Lost in the array of pictures is a picture of him. Your first instinct is to bury it, shoving it under all the other pictures. You scoff, turning to look at the skyline for a while. You try to pry him out of your head, but your heart is yearning to look at the picture again. You shake your head again and again, trying to think about something else, anything else.
  Your hands move on their own accord, looking though the mess you made to find his picture again. You find it at last, a sigh escaping past your lips. The picture sports you and Jungkook, your (now) ex-boyfriend, happily smiling with matching peace signs framing your faces. Jungkook’s hair is hidden under a bucket hat, messy strands peeking through, while his eyes shine brightly, a million little stars hidden away in their depths. Next to him, your smile has taken over your features, almost making your eyes seal shut. You both look so happy, so good together, like puzzle pieces that fit perfectly.
  You can feel your heart twist inside your chest. The memory behind the picture surfaces quickly, as it from the days you were still trying to impress each other. For your first dates, you would take turns showing the other your favourite places around the city, trying to get to know each other better. This picture was from an outing at one of Jungkook’s favourite pastry places.
  With Jungkook, every day was an adventure, every day brought a surprise. He always went down roads no one ever treaded, happy to make a path for himself where there was none. There were no easy choices with him, only right ones.
  You knew if you kept looking at that part of the pictures, you’d find more traces of him. After all, he had been a big part of your life for almost two years. So you went ahead and looked through the pictures, from your one year anniversary, to meeting his parents, then yours, silly pictures taken on drunk nights, memorabilia from your road trips.
  Tearing away your gaze from the photos, you changed your position, now sitting cross-legged as you beheld the sky line. Your thoughts were bringing back memories from your relationship, as if a film was playing before you and you couldn’t stop watching.
  You recalled your first meetings, soft hellos on the elevator or when you were grabbing your mail. You soon learned that he lived with his best friend on the floor above you, apartment 4C. You and your own best friend were currently residing on apartment 3C. Coincidence? Maybe.
  Then again, perhaps not. For random meetings were one thing, but him walking out to your beloved fire escape more and more often could not be incidental. The first couple of times it happened, a comfortable silence reigned over you after a timid greeting, both of you cherishing the time to get lost in your thoughts.
  You almost jumped out of your skin when he finally walked up to you one day in one of your favourite cafes. You remember well, how he managed to gather up the courage to walk up to you, messy flock of brown hair and all, using his favourite greeting, one he saved only for you.
  “Hey stranger”, the sound of his voice plays in your head.
  After that day, lonely hours on your fire escape became hang out sessions as you talked about what was on your minds, letting go of all your worries. You found solace in him and he grew to trust you more and more. Those stolen moments turned to actual dates when you finally got fed up and asked him out. As you got to know him better, you discovered that the mysterious guy living a floor above you wasn’t mysterious at all.
  Jungkook was… his own galaxy. How could someone’s presence be so enticing, screaming at everyone to take note of him, while he was introverted and quiet? How could someone excel at basically everything he did, everything his hands touched turning into gold, yet be so blissfully unaware of it? How could someone be so passionate, pouring himself into his work, whatever that may be, while remaining unsure of himself?
  He was full of contradictions indeed. And those contradictions became the cause of your relationship falling apart. He made you happy, even in those last days, you truly felt happy when you were with him. But more and more obstacles came to stand between you. You had lost your way of connecting and he seemingly wasn’t interested in getting it back.
  The screaming still lingers in your ears. You can almost hear the glass breaking as you both screamed at each other, desperately trying to get the other person to listen.
  Yet you don’t regret speaking up that day. If anything, it showed you what you already knew. You were both too caught up in yourselves to be someone for the other person to love. While you still cared for him, you knew that staying your distance was what you both needed.
  Especially now. You truly couldn’t fathom how the opportunity for you to get away had just bounced onto your lap. You accepted without a second thought, knowing it was just the opportunity you were searching for. And here you were, packing, ready to start traveling as the personal assistant of one of the most influential photographers in the fashion industry.
  The industry was complicated of course, yet you had always loved it dearly. You had made your first skirt at the age of 13, only for your love to grow as you started unfolding more fashion secrets. From altering thrifted clothes, to making your own, to studying fashion in university, you were dedicated to your dream. Now, you were caught up in it, finally landing the break you wanted to enter the exclusive world you have only caught glimpse of until now and making your dream into reality.
  A knock came from your door, violently snapping you away from your thoughts. You twisted around a bit, calling for them to come in. Lisa’s head peaked from behind your door, a smile lighting up her face.
  “Hey, you” she called, walking over to you.
  “Hey baby” you answered, smiling back at her, the nickname effortlessly flowing from your lips.
  You scooted over, inviting her to sit next to you. You got comfortable on the small space, leaving your legs to hang out as you snuggled under the blanket. Your head came to rest easily on her shoulder, fitting perfectly in position as you both watched the city lights flicker before you.
  “At least you’ve opened up the boxes” she teased you.
  “Hey!” you said, poking her stomach as retaliation, “I’m almost done with my closet and I’ve packed all my books! That only leaves…” you let your voice trail off, your eyes skimming your room.
  “Literally everything else” she joked again, and this time you couldn’t help but laugh with her.
  “Do you need help, baby? I know this must be hard for you mentally” she asked, her tone sweet, deprived from the joking attitude she had only moments before.
  You needn’t think for an answer, only shook your head firmly.
  “I need to do this myself. Come to terms with it.” You told her.
  You felt her nod as a comfortable silence reigned between you. After a few moments, you felt her arms around you tighten. Without a word, you tightened your own hold around her waist.
  “I’m going to miss you so much” you whispered.
  “I’m going to miss you too. It almost feels like I don’t know what to do with myself now that you’re leaving.” She told you.
  You had nothing to say to that. You and Lisa had been stuck at the hip for years and yet, you knew it was time for you to move on. From the very first day you met her in your assigned dorm room, to today, when your paths would inevitably split up, Lisa had been an invaluable friend to you. It was hard for you to imagine a life without her next to you.
  But you weren’t scared. You knew her better than she knew herself, and vice versa. She understood you and you knew that she would always be there for you. Your friendship was strong. It would hold out.
  “You know”, she broke the silence “Joon texted”
  Your eyes widened at the mention of the boy. Namjoon was Jungkook’s roommate and best friend, currently hidden away inside the apartment above you. You looked back at your best friend before asking,
  “What did he say?”
  “Well… It appears that he let slip to Jungkook that you’re leaving. And he didn’t take it very well” she admitted.
  “Oh?” you asked.
  “Apparently he’s throwing a temper tantrum up there. So I thought…” she was saying, when you cut her off.
  “No. Lisa, no” you said sternly.
  “Y/N,” she begun, only for you to cut her off again.
  “No, Lisa, don’t. I don’t want to see him. I don’t want to talk to him. I just want to drink my tea and pack in peace” you told her.
  “Is that enough? What about closure?” she asked you.
  “I’ve had it. It’s been six months. If he wanted to talk it out, he should’ve done it a long time ago” you answered.
  “If that’s what you want…” she said, her voice trailing off.
  “That’s what I want. I’m leaving this place and him behind me. I only ever need you” you said, trying to give her a comforting smile.
  “Oh shut up you cheesy little shit” she said, cuddling further into you.
  After a few moments of silence, Lisa slowly started to draw herself away.
  “I’m too cold for this. I’ll see you later?” she asked, climbing back inside.
  “Sure. I’ll try to finish up so we can have those drinks we talked about. Girls’ night?” you offered.
  Lisa’s face lit up as she nodded eagerly. You loved the thought yourself, putting your phones away for a while and just having drinks with your best friend sounded like a dream. You wrapped the blanket tighter around yourself as you got lost in your thoughts once again.
  You watched silently as cars passed from the road under you, hurriedly trying to get to their destination. Not a lot of people were out, and those who were, were maneuvering through the streets, rushing to return to the safety of their homes.
  There’s a storm coming. You thought, watching dark clouds filled with rain make their way towards the city. Funny, the weather always found a way to match your mood. Your eyes turned to the open boxes once again as you struggled to form a plan to get through packing as fast as possible.
  Then, the familiar creaking sound of a window opening above you startled you. All your muscles tensed up, your body going on overdrive, your senses heightened. You tried to keep your head straight, silently praying that he just opened the window to get some air, that he wasn’t going to get out.
  Your prayers went unanswered.
  The fire escape creaked loudly as more weight was pushed on it. You heard him huff lightly as he settled down, getting comfortable. Your mind could already see him, even though your eyes couldn’t, his legs spread in front of him, cigarettes in hand, back leaning on the wall as his face was colored by the blinking lights of the city.
  “Hey, stranger” Jungkook called you, causing your breath to hitch at your throat.
  You masked your shock by taking a sip of your tea, trying to brush Jungkook off. However, he had other plans.
  “I know you can hear me. It’s okay if you don’t want to talk to me, just don’t fucking ignore me.” He snapped.
  You didn’t pretend you didn’t hear him this time. You scoffed, annoyed but his stubbornness, turning to look at him, your eyes searching for his. He was sprawled across the staircase just like you expected, his hands busy swirling around a pack of cigarettes. His hair was longer now, you noted, parted square in the middle, curls falling effortlessly to frame his face. His doe eyes were the same, holding your gaze as his tongue moved out of his mouth to wet his lips.
  “Hello, Jungkook” you said curtly.
  “Well then, that wasn’t that hard, was it?” he asked, his lips turning up into a smirk.
  You shook your head, not wanting to lead him on further. It seemed that he was also out of things to say, for silence overtook you for a few moments. Jungkook then opened his pack, placing a cigarette between his lips and fumbling for a lighter. Having located it, he lit his cigarette, taking a big swig of it and letting out a puff of smoke in the shape of a ring.
  His eyes found yours again, for yours were already on him, watching his movements. Something flashed in his eyes then, so quick you didn’t have time to put a finger on it. Without a word, he tossed the pack on your lap.
  Your eyes shifted from the cigarettes to him as you tried to figure out what to do. Your mind drifted back to the thought of crossroads as you grabbed the pack with your hands. Lisa’s voice also replayed in your head. Closure. Such a silly thing.
  You opened the pack, picking up a cigarette and putting it between your fingers. You reached out, motioning for Jungkook to pass you the lighter. He reached for you, lighter in hand, your hands brushing a little as you got the lighter. Sheltering the small flame with your hand, you lit your cigarette, the familiar feeling of smoke filling your lungs overtaking you.
  You blew out the smoke in a puff, failing to make a ring identical to his. You placed the pack and cigarettes some steps above you and in Jungkook’s reach. He tossed them back inside, turning his attention back to you. Only this time, you weren’t looking at him.
  Your eyes had drifted away, back onto the bustling city as the cigarette in your hand burned like a beacon. Jungkook felt his heart twist inside his chest, felt his hands yearning to touch you, his lips to be placed upon yours. He managed to quiet his thoughts, assuming a stoic expression as you turned back to look at him.
  There was something in your eyes, something Jungkook had never seen there before. He tried to hold your gaze, but you looked away too quickly, your eyes falling on the inside of your room.
  “Shouldn’t you be packing?” he asked, testing the waters.
  “Well, I am here now” you said, turning to look at him once more.
   Jungkook’s mind was flooded with possibilities, things he’s never told you, things he wished to tell you, for so long. You were desperately trying to read him, wishing that you know what was happening inside his head.
  “Jungkook…” “Y/N…” you spoke up at the same time.
  You chuckled, Jungkook soon following suit. Still, after all those months, you were in tune. You looked at him, smile still settled on your lips as he returned the look. He motioned for you to go first and you took a swig of your cigarette, trying to buy yourself some time.
  You opened your mouth to speak up when a drop of rain fell on your hair. You were startled, flinching as you turned to look at the sky. He flinched too after a few seconds, a droplet of rain dropping on his shoulder. Slowly but surely, large drops started falling from the sky all around you, leaving you to giggle like a child.
  “Want to take this inside? Help me pack, keep me company, whatever?” you asked, the words tumbling out of your mouth before you could stop yourself.
  He raised a brow, looking directly at you as you fumbled with your blanket, trying to get it over your head to shield you from the rain. Once you met his eyes again, he was still curiously regarding you. You put out your cigarette, throwing it away and waiting expectantly for his answer.
  With one last drag, Jungkook put out his own cigarette, getting up. He was hovering over you when he said simply,
  “Let’s go”
  You smiled up at him, happy with his answer as you pushed your way back inside. You threw the now damp blanket in a corner of the room, suddenly self-conscious of the awful mess. You heard him shuffle his way in, landing rather ungracefully on the floor under your window.
  “You’d think that after doing this so many times you would have gotten the hang of it… You disappoint me Jeon” you joked.
  Jungkook glared at you, causing you to laugh loudly. You reached for your phone, going to text Lisa that you had someone over, as you always did and vice versa. Your hand hovered over the screen, hesitating to open the messaging app.
  Telling Lisa would… Complicate things. She’d ask questions after, questions you couldn’t answer because in all honesty, you didn’t know why you called him over. How did you go from not wanting to see him or talk to him to inviting him over? You weren’t really sure. In the end, he’d exit the way it came. No trouble at all. Right?
  Yes, your mind answered for you. Lisa definitely doesn’t need to know.
  You realized Jungkook was talking to you, making you turn abruptly on your heels.
  “Sorry, I was kind of daydreaming for a second. What was that?” you asked.
  Jungkook smiled at you, slightly shaking his head before saying,
  “I just said that you looked very concentrated for a person staring at a black screen”
  “Oh shut up” you said, making him raise his hands in surrender.
  You huffed loudly, placing your hands on your hips and looking around your room, trying to decide where to begin. One glance at your vinyl collection made the decision for you. The small stack, which only grew over the years, was an easy thing to check off of your list. Grabbing the box closest to you, you sat yourself down at your desk chair, a comfortable distance away from the shelf your vinyl had resided in… Until now.
  Glancing briefly at Jungkook, you found him still sat on the floor, eyes locked on the screen of his phone. His eyebrows were furrowed together in concentration and without glancing at the screen, you knew he was keeping himself busy with a game on his phone. Still exactly the same, your mind added. The silence between you wasn’t awkward, but it was tense, so you decided to speak up.
  “You know, you could always sit on the bed. Or actually help me pack”
  “So you brought me here to do your dirty work for you? No thanks” he said.
  “Oh come on, you can’t just sit on your phone! Just do the board games or something” you urged him on.
  He got on his feet, making you think that he would actually do as you asked. You turned back to the task at hand only to jump at the feeling of his hands gracing your shoulders lightly.
  “I could always do you” he said, his tone low.
  You almost lost yourself in the touch, when you snapped yourself back to reality, flinching away from him. You were glad you couldn’t see him, it only made your next words easier.
  “In your dreams Jeon.” You said in an attempt to lighten the atmosphere.  
  You heard him mutter something under his breath, before actually making his way to grab a box to fill with your board games. He settled down, getting to work without a word. Your mind was running on speeds you didn’t know possible, your shoulders still tingling where his hands had touched you.
  At some point you heard him laugh out loud, making your racing mind cease, your attention brought back to him. You looked at him shyly from under your hair, somewhat afraid to meet his gaze head on.
  “Remember when we used to have best friends vs best friends board game nights and Joon would kick your ass in Name, Animal, Plant with words like, oh, I don’t know, fucking Hyacinth or something?” he said, still chuckling slightly.
  You too laugh at the memories. While you and Jungkook were still together, you, Lisa and the boys would often meet up for game nights of board games, loads of food and alcohol. You fondly remembered those nights, were everything was normal, there was no weight in your chest and your smiles came as easily as breathing.
  “Remember that night Lisa sprained her ankle while we were playing charades?” you retorted.
  He broke into a laughing fit, clearly recalling the crazy night that followed the incident. So many memories came to mind, replaying in front of you effortlessly. So many happy memories, so many smiles, laughs and inside jokes, so many things connecting you.
  What went wrong? Your head screamed as you watched Jungkook’s back. He was animatedly reminding you of all that transpired one night where Namjoon believed himself “Extremely sexy” and tried dancing to ‘Havana’ by Camilla Cabello. You, of course, where there, and you recalled the event quite vividly.
  But there was something about watching him retell the story, the corner of his lips turning up as he spoke, his eyes getting smaller and smaller as laughter sealed them shut. His words were often stopped by laughing fits and he turned around to see if you were watching now and again. Each time, you’d meet his eyes, nodding in encouragement as you threw your own two cents in, pushing the story further.
  Having him with you made you feel weird and safe at the same time. You appreciated the company, he always found a way to make you feel at ease and after a while the conversation flowed naturally between you, as if you were two old friends… Which you were. Kind of. Furthermore, the night had a tone of finality in it.
  It was strange for you, sitting in a room with him, surrounded by your things and burdened with so many memories and yet not being able to touch him. You were holding yourself back, filtering your actions, words and emotions carefully. You were balancing on the edge of a cliff and it would only take so much for you to tip into your demise. You stole glances at him, not yet ready to study him openly. You recognized all the small mannerisms and quirks that made Jungkook, Jungkook. But still, you were reserved, keeping your voice down and your laughs short, not being able to lose yourself in him, his presence, his voice, his laugh, his words.
  It shouldn’t surprise you how easily you worked together, moving in different parts of the room and wrapping things neatly. You knew the other well and still, you were in tune, giving the other space when needed or rushing to help sort something out. You could read each other with a simple sideways glance, which could be part of the reason you still hadn’t met his gaze since you came inside.
  You didn’t need to give him instructions or anything, he simply took initiative and started placing your belongings in boxes, trying to save you space and fit as many things in as possible. After sitting on your suitcase, squeezing it with all your might in a final attempt to close it, it was over.
  You stood with your hands on your hips, a final huff leaving you as you admired your handiwork. The boxes were neatly placed one on top of the other in a corner of the room and Jungkook was now dragging your suitcase to sit with them.
  “I guess we make a pretty good team, huh?” he asked.
  And it had happened. You’d tipped from the edge. You felt the tone of the room shift, his seemingly innocent question bouncing off of your walls in an unending echo. Your heartbeat picked up, your hands getting sweaty as you fumbled for words to answer him.
  You sat on top of your bed, craving for some kind of comfort. He turned to look at you then, his doe eyes finding yours. It took all of your strength to muster up a smile, shaky as it was. It sufficed, for you saw Jungkook nod a little, seemingly mulling over his own words.
  “How about some music?” you asked, taking your phone on your hands.
  “No, not you, I’m designated DJ, remember?” Jungkook stopped you, already opening Spotify on his phone.
  You gave him the finger, laying back on your bed and waiting for him to play something that fit the mood. Jungkook admittedly had his way with music. He listened to a huge array of different artists and was happy to provide you with playlist for any given emotion or situation. Your favorite one, one of the last tokens of his you held dear, was the one he had named after the city you lived in, managing to capture its vibe perfectly.
Remember when we first met?
You said, “Light my cigarette”
 He absolutely did not. You shot up on your bed to find him already looking at you from under his curls. A cheeky smile made its way to his lips as your head swirled in circles. He sat back, challenging you with a look.
 He played your song. Your fucking song. On one of the first times you hanged out with him, still in the awkward phase you only bumped into each other and shared a few words on the fire escape, you discovered you both harbored the same love for a singer named Troye Sivan.
  As your relationship matured, blossomed into a true companionship, ‘Strawberries and Cigarettes’ came out. And it fit. It fit like a glove, just like the faint cigarette taste that adorned Jungkook’s lips and the strawberry flavored gum you were somewhat addicted to. It fit in the way he taught you to make smoke rings and the road trips you had gone on together. It fit in the black jeans he always wore, the spare lighters that you always seemed to find in the bottom of your purse and fighting over boxes of candy.
  And even now, it fit. Because you were leaving, ‘giving your heart a holiday’. Because you were wondering if you’d teach each other fate.
  The song softly played as your thoughts raced inside your head, Jungkook patiently waiting for your reaction.
  “Turn it off” you finally found the strength to say, holding his gaze.
  Your voice came out low, shaky and you cursed yourself for not being able to have more conviction. He did as he was told without a fight, as you got on your feet to look outside the window, anything to avoid his eyes. The storm was still going strong outside, the rain playing notes on the metal of the fire escape.
  You took a few deep breaths, making an effort to calm yourself down. Too preoccupied in your thoughts, you didn’t hear him get up or walk up to you. You jumped when you felt his hands on you, trying to wrap themselves around your waist.
  His movements stopped momentarily, obviously waiting for you to shove him away. When you didn’t, he eased his arms around you, placing his hands in the pockets of your hoodie.
  What the fuck am I doing? You asked yourself as Jungkook rested his head against yours and you instinctively melted at the touch. A few moments of stillness and tranquility passed, until Jungkook moved, placing a kiss on the side of your head.
 Your eyes fluttered closed, as all your other senses heightened, the feeling of his hands around you, his scent, his movements, all way too familiar. He breathed in your scent, stopping there for a few moments to ground himself. Then, his kisses moved, first to the shell of your ear, then your temple, your cheek, to arrive and settle on your lips.
  He still tasted the same. The thought made you want to cry as you felt his hand cup your face to keep you in place. You allowed yourself to savor it, savor the way he felt pressed against you, his lips on top of yours. Your legs turned to jelly as your hands grabbed his shoulders to keep you steady. You felt yourself slip back into a time when this was not a rare occurrence but everyday life, when you were awarded with kisses for the smallest of feats and when your lips on his didn’t feel like a breath of fresh air but rather coming back home after a long day.
  Home. The word abruptly brought you back to reality. You pulled away, untangling yourself from him.
  “Stop” you said, still no conviction in your voice.
  “Y/N, just-” he started but you cut him off.
  “No, Jungkook. No. This is closure okay? This is it. I’m leaving tomorrow, you know that. Why are making this harder for me? Why should we re-open old wounds?” you asked him.
  “Because they haven’t fully healed, Y/N! Look, I know you’re leaving tomorrow but…” his voice trailed off, his hands curling into fists.
  “There are no buts, Jungkook! You helped me pack for Christ’s sake, you helped me wrap up things here. It’s done. I’m doing this” you said.
  “Then why would you kiss me like that?” he asked.
  The question hit you like a ton of bricks. Why did you kiss him indeed?
  “I don’t know.” You answered truthfully.
   He scoffed, pressing his body on top of yours once more. He grabbed your hand, placing it over his heart. His movements were abrupt and rushed, his hand pressing yours so hard it almost hurt. You felt his erratic heartbeat as he spoke up,
  “Do you feel that? That’s my heart, still crazy over you. All night, it took everything in me not to kiss you. But I did. And when you kissed back I… I thought there was a chance. Just tell me. Tell me you don’t want this” he said.
  “Jungkook…” you started, your voice trailing off as your thoughts got clouded by your close proximity.
  Taking a step back, you were pushed against the wall, his body caging your own, arms on either side of your body, eyes baring into yours. You felt like you couldn’t breathe, let alone think, everything becoming too much and too intense. You desperately tried to collect your thoughts, find a way to get to him, make him understand why you couldn’t.
  “I have to go. This is something I have to do, for me.” You explained.
  For a few moments, there was silence. Neither of you moved as your eyes were stuck on the necklace dangling from his neck, a small anchor. Your gift. You just couldn’t take it anymore. It felt like you were being dealt with blow after blow and it was all too much. Not baring the silence any longer, you weaseled under his arms as you spoke up.
  “This was a mistake. I’m… I’m sorry I kissed you, I thought it was closure but… It’s clearly not. You should go” you told him, turning your back on him as you desperately tried to keep your voice from breaking.
  “Y/N. Please.” he begged.
  You shook your head, your hair whipping around as the tears started to blur your vision. You looked at him with the corner of your eye, not strong enough to face him head on. His expression was open, his arms dangling on his sides, defeated.
  “I need this, Jungkook, more than you’ll ever know. I need to get out. I need… I need to start over. Please. Don’t make this any harder.” You tried to explain.
  Finally, something flashed in his eyes. Could it be realization? You’d never know, for he pried open the window forcefully, turning around to look at you again.
  “For the record, I’m not sorry. I don’t take anything that I said or did back. I still love you. Always will.” He said.
  Without waiting for your reply, he got out into the staircase and the rain. A few droplets landed on your window seat, but you didn’t care, only watched frozen as he walked away from you.
  A few moments later, your tears slowed down enough for you to close the window.
  “I still love you too.” You whispered onto the glass, a sob chocking you.
  Eyes bloodshot and nose running, you went to find Lisa in the kitchen. Once you walked in the room, Lisa took in your disheveled state and rushed to your side. When she gathered you in her arms, new tears found their way into your eyes.
  “Oh, baby” Lisa said, rubbing soothing circles down your back.
  “He was here” you stated.
  “I know. Joon texted me the screenshot once Jungkook texted him” she told you.
  “Traitor. I didn’t want you to know” you mumbled.
  “I know. But you weren’t sly either. I could hear you laughing clear as day” she said.
   “Fuck. This place isn’t soundproof at all. Thank God I’m leaving” you joked through the tears.
  “Hey. I’m stuck here for another two years for my post grad. Show some respect” she joked back, wiping the tears away from your cheeks.
   “Now sit your ass down. I’m busting open the good wine and we’re going to talk about everything tonight” she said, giving you a theatrical spin.
  And talk you did. As you got through the whole bottle, even bringing out a second one for a couple of glasses, you talked and talked about what transpired that night, Jungkook and Namjoon, school and work and everything in between.
  That night, none of you bared to be alone, so you found yourselves sharing Lisa’s purple comforter on either sides of her bed, your legs tangled together to feel closer to each other.
  This is it. Last night. Your head kept repeating as sleep finally claimed you.
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   Morning came quicker than you expected, the blaring of your alarm startling you awake. You groaned at the sound, turning it off as quickly as possible before turning to lie on your back. Lisa stirred next to you, as you knew she would, taking a couple of minutes before opening her eyes.
  You stared at the ceiling for a few moments, your brain trying to fully wake up before you peeled the comforter off your form, leaving Lisa to scroll through her phone. You washed up quickly, getting ready and you meeting Lisa in the kitchen for breakfast.
  Only this time, she didn’t greet you with her usual soft smile. She slowly peeled her teary eyes from her mug to watch you walk in.
  “Oh baby” you said, immediately rushing to her side and wrapping your arms around her.
  Your own eyes filled with tears as your best friend sobbed into your shoulder, holding you tightly. You whispered soothing words in her ear, trying to calm her down, reassure her that you were going to be just fine. She composed herself, and you poured two bowls of sugary cereal, one for each of you and a mug of coffee for yourself.
  You nibbled on the cereal in silence, both evidently trying to hold back tears. With a glance at her phone’s clock, Lisa was the first to break the silence.
  “We should go” she announced and you just nodded at her words.
  You moved to your room, dragging your big suitcase with you, leaving the boxes to be picked up in a day or two by the moving company. You checked your purse for last things, making sure you had everything. Your eyes scanned the small room, your heart swelling with nostalgia and your eyes getting teary again. You perched the purse further up your shoulder, before whispering a goodbye to the room that had been your safe place for almost three years.
  You dragged your suitcase to the living room, where Lisa was waiting for you. Again, you looked around a room that held so many memories of you and your friends, lovers, passing people and everyone in between. You had to close your eyes for a moment to stop the tears. With one deep breath and a firm nod, you turned to Lisa.
  “I’m ready” you announced, closing the door behind you.
  The ride to the airport was filled with silence, as a random radio station provided you with music. None of you paid too much attention to it, both too preoccupied with your own thoughts. You looked out of the window, your eyes racing over the familiar streets of the city you studied in. You remembered how lost you were the first times you had gotten out on your own. Now, it felt like the city was imprinted in the back of your hand.
  Finally arriving at the airport, you and Lisa unloaded your suitcase from the back of her car and she offered to carry it until you checked in. After finding the correct counter and checking in, you and Lisa sat down in a nearby bench. A few moments passed by, before she started rambling, clearly nervous,
  “Do you have anything to eat? Maybe you’ll get hungry on the plane, let me go get you something”
  You got hold of her hand before she could stand up, pulling her back in the seat next to you.
  “Baby, I’m fine. Can we just… Sit here for a few minutes before I go?” you asked her.
  Lisa didn’t reply, only nodded a little before resting her head on your shoulder. You rested your head on top of hers, a sigh falling from your lips. At that moment, you were content.
  The time flowed by too quickly for your liking and before you knew it, the airport speakers announced that your gate was opening in only 10 minutes. Your eyes met Lisa’s as both of you got up to walk to your gate. Your movements were slow as you walked, your hands entwined.
  When you arrived, you were surprised to find Jungkook standing in front of the gate, legs clad in black jeans, a black hoodie thrown on top, hair a complete mess. His chest was heaving, his eyes searching the crowd franticly before they met with yours.
  His lips formed your name and you felt a smile creeping on your face. He run towards you and you opened your arms to welcome him. His body hit yours like a tidal wave, as he gathered you up in his arms, crashing his body on yours as if he was trying to consume you.
  Giggles bubbled through you as you felt his arms tighten around you. You buried your face in his neck, breathing him in, the all too familiar scent of his aftershave, cigarettes and soap.
  “I just couldn’t let you go” he mumbled in your ear.
  Your eyes filled with tears as you drew back, desperate to get one good look at him. He let you, your eyes locking in an intense stare. You raised your hand, softly running it threw his hair as his eyes fell shut, melting into your touch.
  A million questions rushed through your head. How did he get here? Why? Why now? Why him? You silenced your mind, choosing to savor the moment, burying your face in his neck once more as his hands moved to wrap tightly around your waist.
  Breaking apart for the last time, you smiled at him as he did the same.
  “Maybe they’ll be a time for us again. We’ll find our way back to each other” you said.
  “Yeah?” he asked innocently.
  “Yes.” You said with certainty, reaching up and placing a small peck on his lips.
  Then, you left him, turning to hold your best friend once more. She squeezed you with all the strength she had and you did the same. Moving back, you raised your pinky and she didn’t hesitate to lock it with her own.
  “Fuck you” you said simultaneously, an old tradition, a token of your friendship.
  Having said your good byes, you moved towards the gate, your steps sure and steady. After the employees checked your ticket, you were allowed to pass through.
  Turning back one last time, you waved to them, sat close together near the gate. You could tell Lisa was crying now and you mentally thanked Jungkook for being there for her, hand across her shoulders. With that last wave, you took a step forward, a step closer towards your new life.
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  After the bad sleep you had the previous night, it came as no surprise to you that you drifted off not even halfway into the movie you had picked to watch on the flight. You were awoken by a flight attendant softly tapping your shoulder and informing you that you were about to land.
  The nerves decided to kick in at that exact moment, making your leg bounce uncontrollably throughout the landing. The woman that sat next to you eyed you closely, but you hardly noticed her stare. You almost darted up from your seat the minute you touched the ground, but you quickly composed yourself, trying to calm down and have some patience for the few remaining moments.
  When the ‘seatbelts on’ sign was turned off, everyone around you bounced to their feet. You too followed their suit, pulling on your coat and gathering all your things. With your purse perched up on your shoulder, you disembarked from the plane, only for you to get lost in a river of counters, checks and searches.
  After all the necessary procedures were over, you were finally able to stand in line and wait for your suitcase which gave you the perfect opportunity to take out your phone to text your mom and Lisa. After shooting out quick texts to both of them that you landed safely, you rummaged through your coat’s pockets for your earphones. Having located them, you plugged them in, opening up Spotify and leaving your favourite songs to play on shuffle.
  Familiar lyrics flowed in your ear, lyrics you had heard only hours before as ‘Strawberries and Cigarettes’ played, Troye Sivan’s voice taking over your senses, clouding your thoughts, leaving you confused and dizzy. Why Spotify? Why would it play here, on your new beginning? Why couldn’t you escape him?
  But then again, you knew that you’d carry Jungkook inside you for a long time yet. He wasn’t an easy person to escape and you weren’t ready to let him go. Maybe this was teaching each other fate. The smile grew on your lips unbeknownst to you as you realized just that:
  The last chapter of your story hadn’t been written just yet.
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bumbershots · 3 years
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A CERTAIN ROMANCE
CHAPTER ONE: JUEVES
Author’s note: Hello! I’ve decided to give it a go, this is my first chaptered fic in this website. This story just occurred to me a while ago and I’ve tried my best to make some sense out of the concept which honestly is forever changing on my mind. I hope you don’t find many grammar mistakes, if you do please let me know. Enjoy! (:
Story masterlist ** Word count: 2.3K ** 
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It's been years since Harry last had to use the tube, but it's not as hard as he thinks, buying the ticket was fairly simple and soon enough he was sitting on the train comfortably. The northern line wasn't too busy, no delays were announced through the speakers, his journey to Ladbroke Grove station was going to last around thirty six minutes. He suddenly can't remember how long the ride would be on a car. Maybe it's time to start using the London Underground a bit more, contributing to saving the planet, lessen his carbon footprint. With all the aeroplanes he takes a year, he should use it from now onto the rest of his life, he thinks with a bit of guilt.
He changes to the Hammersmith and city line with ease, passing by lots of people, no one truly pays attention to him. The school girls that would usually come up to him and ask for a picture are too busy gossiping among themselves, the grown up adults that are more fond of his solo work are too immersed into their own thoughts about annoying bosses. Harry likes to blend into the crowd that's gathered now at the station and awaits for the train. In the eyes of the others, he's just another guy patiently waiting for the train to hop on and get to his destination. Even though he was on his way to meet with the team that will take care of his house renovation, a property valued approximately on £4.175 million.
The train arrives and he follows the multitude that pile into the wagon, he isn't lucky to find a seat this time but doesn't mind as he finds a good spot to lean against, the doors close just as he skips the ABBA song he doesn't feel like listening at the moment and settles for Hanson instead. He bops his head along the tune before slipping back the mobile in his pocket, eyes traveling along the passengers' faces, trying to guess what they're up to.
A group of lads wearing the Tottenham jersey discuss the latest game, one of them praising Kane's goal and regretting him missing the next match. Harry knows a thing or two about football, he even plays it regularly with his friends not so far away from his home, but he doesn't keep up with Manchester United, perhaps he can do that from now on he thinks before letting his gaze fall upon the pack getting down on Baker Street and the few ones hopping on. Most of them are tourists chatting about the Sherlock Holmes museum, the singer smiles, remembering the first time he visited it with his family, many years ago. Sometimes he longs for those days to be back, so he can do the typical touristy things with the people he loves the most once in a while or have a date without a good amount of lenses focused on his every move.
Not that he regrets being a well known musician, actor, model. It comes with a lot of perks. But he's just moving on from a breakup that might have been his fault. He's a workaholic for sure, even though he's supposed to be taking it easy, his mind can't help but keep throwing song ideas for the next album. That is why Jeff suggested the home renovation, knowing that the project will keep him busy for about three months, maybe more if the contractors up sell their ideas.
Harry makes his way out of the station in one piece and without being spotted, he checks the address again on his phone, confirming the place where the meeting will be held is within walking distance and makes his way before choosing a Pink Floyd song for the six minute walk. He pulls his coat tighter around him, relishing in the forever changing weather of the city, this time he will stay and enjoy it in full, maybe even delight in the autumn too, have his mum over for a couple of weeks, maybe he'll even stay longer and take her to the ice rink.
Just as Harry plots on where to go when his favourite person pays him a visit, he reaches the private front garden off a beautiful car-free garden square. He remembers to text Jack, who doesn't take long to appear in the distance and unlock the gate for his friend.
"You're impossibly early mate," the man greets with an amused chuckle.
"Sorry, had to take the tube because of what you said about car-free development, probably miscalculated the time." Harry admits sheepishly, scratching the back of his neck as Jack leads the way through the garden. "Is this where they filmed Notting Hill?" He wonders with another look around.
"Couple of scenes that didn't make the cut, our neighbour Mrs. Black will tell you all about it, if you happen to run into her around Hugh Grant's birthday." Harry laughs as they reach a private entrance with a well-maintained front garden adorning the forepart of the property, he follows Jack inside the home where a strong coffee scent greets them both.
The musician quickly scans the large open plan kitchen/reception room with large glass sliding patio doors to a delightful independent garden where a round table is surrounded by four mismatching chairs. He doesn't remember Jack's old place, but it certainly didn't look as the dream home they're standing in right now.
"Thanks for agreeing to do the meeting here mate," Harry's words are sincere his companion can tell, he tries to shove it off as if it's nothing, handing him the mug with coffee while he pours another one for himself, "I know it can be a handful, the NDAs too." Now he's almost blushing.
"We should be thanking you H, work from home for the next couple of months, my dream come true." Jack manages to make him laugh and feel at ease again, just before the steps of a third party come from the stairs and grow closer towards them. "Just in time, Harry this is Fernando Gonzalez, my housemate and architect of the team." He introduces the tall man to his friend and watches them shake each other's hand, "Fernando this is our client, Harry Styles."
"It's a pleasure to finally meet you Mr. Styles," his voice is soft and melodic, like an aerophone instrument.
"Please call me H, all my friends do," the musician knows this is business, but he wants to have fun too, like Jeff suggested. And the guy looks way too young to be calling him Mister Styles.
"I warned you Fer, he likes to keep it easy, breezy." Jack says motioning both of them to follow his lead and sit down in their dining table that is covered with house design magazines, floor plans of Harry's home and a couple of what the pop star assumes are sketch notebooks. "Alright, tell us about your vision for this project." In all honesty, Harry doesn't know how to answer that.
He fights the urge to say that he had purchased the property knowing that not much is needed to be done to the décor. The style and the flow of the house is already lovely. After a quick glance at the plan he thinks that maybe, more room is needed and, most importantly, a new kitchen-dining-living space that would be grand enough to entertain in, but cosy enough to be the central 'hub' of his home.
"The windows, for starters, have to be replaced." He begins with a tone so confident that the pair before him don't suspect he's improvising the whole thing. "New bathrooms, perhaps from Lusso Stone, demolish an existing rear extension from the top and design and build an entirely new expansive ultra-modern one, like the one at Lou's home." Jack nods understanding what he means, "I also want a kitchen diner extension, pink granite worktops, if possible." Harry finishes before grabbing one of the magazines and starts flipping pages just to look busy.
The whole project can take six months, they let him know, through the summer and autumn. He's elated at achieving double the time he hoped for in the beginning.
"We'll send the paperwork to your team and see you next week to sign it once they approve it," Jack concludes the meeting as they all finish their coffee. "Are you busy on the nineteenth?" His friend's voice is warmer now that he's not on business mode, it makes Harry smile.
"I don't think I am, why?"
"It's Freddie's birthday, you should come, catch up with the lads," Harry nods while thinking about it, a bit unsure because it has been a while since he's seen the rest of the pack, he's not sure they'll welcome him just like that. "They're always asking about you, could be like old times, lads doing laddy stuff," the green eyed musician chuckles at that, not sure if he wants to go back to those activities of their youth.
"Sure I'll go, text me the address a few days before," his friend nods in approval to his request, "I better get going, I have to pick up my sister for dinner, see you both next week." The youngest nods and shakes Harry's hand before Jack leads the way out the house and square. The sun is setting now and the sky is a mix of pink and purple hues just as the two men bid their goodbyes until they meet again in a week's time.
Harry scolds himself for buying a one way ticket earlier instead of sorting out an Oyster card, he'll do that next time, he thinks before stepping into the train and finding a seat in the middle section of it. Led Zeppelin is a good soundtrack for his journey back home, for some reason he is craving the powerful, noisy, speedy rebellion that came with the band's songs, he loved to get so lost in the music that whatever activity he did came in second, every single time. Which is why he almost didn't get off at the King's cross stop, he hurried out of the vehicle, laughing to himself for being so immersed into the music.
The way back to the northern line was now familiar, but not as busy, he decided not to walk too fast after confirming that he had enough time to go home and take a shower before going over to Gemma's. Waiting at the platform he decides to change his playlist, again. Just as he's about to settle for Wings, out of the corner of his eye he spies what the person next to him is listening to and he stops from hitting play on his own device.
The who.
It's been ages since he heard them, three years if he is being honest. The train arrives and the girl next to him puts her phone in her coat pocket as she prepares to board the wagon, Harry does the same, but instead of training his eyes on the descending passengers, he lets them focus on her. She's wearing a nice burgundy coat, a black newsboy cap, high-waisted jeans with a blue polka dot blouse tucked underneath them. She's much shorter than he is, probably about Helene's height, he thinks as they make their way inside.
Without meaning to, he follows her and leans on the wall, across from her. She doesn't seem to notice how his stare is burning holes into her face, he's itching to ask her where did she buy the red boots she's wearing. Harry knows the moment he speaks to her, it will all go to shit. Some of the school girls sitting nearby might recognise his voice, his dimple could pop out to play and give him away too. She might also think he's a creep and kick him in the shin, leaving a nasty bruise that would heal in about a week, unlike the invisible one in his ego.
"Are you telling me, you developed a ten feet tall crush on someone you saw on the tube?" Gemma asks later that night, her fork full of linguine was stopped mid-air, making her brother roll his eyes but nod bashfully. "I'm speechless." The fork resumes its trajectory and she chews her pasta slowly.
"It happens to everyone, only because you both know that there's almost no chance to see each other again." Harry shrugs and bites a piece of bread, still feeling weird about the situation.
"Did she make eyes at you?"
"What?" He's completely taken off guard by his sister's question, his northern accent coming out and making him drop the 't' at the end.
"Yes, did you flirt with each other making eyes," Gemma's eyelashes flutter as if she was a Disney princess meeting her love interest for the first time, Harry shakes his head in denial, "what was it then?"
"I don't know! It was weird, couldn't take my eyes off of her but... she didn't even notice, I sound like a dirty man," he does, his sister agrees but the pink spots on his cheekbones tell a different story.
"I once had a crush like that, with a cashier at Waitrose," she remembers before sipping her wine, "he was nice to look at, one day he wasn't there anymore, just like that." Gemma sighed and took her younger sibling's hand on hers before adding. "If our lives were a Nicholas Sparks novel, perhaps we would be getting ready to have a date with those lovely people but..." Harry laughed and gave her hand a gentle squeeze.
"How's the sunnies collaboration going?" He asked before taking the last of his gnocchi. Listening to his sister talk about things that she enjoyed was the highlight of his days, he managed to push his silly underground crush to the back of his mind.
But there was the truth of what Harry couldn't see, or say. He'd probably like to have a shot with a girl like that and if Gemma could only see her, she would agree. Agree that there might be a story around there.
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