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schrijverr · 4 months

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It Just Hits Different When It’s Batman

5 times a League member heard Batman use slang + 1 time they knew where the fuck he got it from.

This fic is based off this post by @wednesday-if-it-was-tuesday bc it was just too good! Hope you don't mind :D

On AO3.

Ships: none

Warnings: none

~~~~~

1. Flash

Barry is pretty sure he has to get his hearing checked as he speeds through a city, trying to find a series of bombs, courtesy of a new alliance of villains. He and Batman are on bomb duty, thus sharing a private com line as to not distract the others or be distracted as they coordinate.

However, Barry is very much distracted by his own partner in this whole mess, because unless he’s gotten a few too many hits to the head in recent years, he’s pretty sure Batman just reported: “The bombs look like yassified thermos flasks.”

“What?” Barry chokes, nearly tripping over his own feet as he does.

Batman doesn’t seem to notice, instead explaining the bomb, not his wording: “The casing looks to be made from plastic, likely to escape Superman’s notice. Start checking water pipes, I found this one near a toilet. I’ll report again once I figure out how to disarm it.”

Okay, questing his sanity later, finding bombs, now.

So he zooms off again, having to agree with the fact that the bomb does look like a yassified thermos flask. He wonders if he can use that in his report or if Batman will scold him for language. He has worked with the man for long enough that he knows Batman isn’t above hypocrisy.

Then he wonders again if he even heard it right. In the heat of battle, the brain sometimes does weird things, especially when someone thinks at the speed of light. Or faster.

He’ll put it out of his mind for now, maybe tell Hal about it just so he’ll have someone to share the bizarre experience with.

Clark probably has a thesaurus, he should probably also find a synonym for yassified. Does a thesaurus have slang too?

2. Green Lantern

It’s true that Barry had told him about Spooky saying yassified in that one battle, but Hal hadn’t truly believed that Bats was capable of something like that. I mean, look at him. The guy might be a weirdo who dresses up as a Bat, but he’s not a weirdo who says shit like yassified.

However, at the moment it is starting to look more and more likely. Fuck, Barry is gonna give him so much crap for not believing him.

The moment in question is Batman working with him on the stealth mission. It’s one for the Green Lantern Corps, so Batman is doing him a favor. Though Hal is starting to wish that he hadn’t done him that favor, because Batman has just said: “It looks like Luthor is being thristy for Superman again. For someone who hates the guy, he sure wants his attention a lot. That’s Kryptonian honing device.”

Hal doesn’t react, still thinking about the fact that he’s just heard Luthor, thirsty and Superman in one sentence. In Batman’s voice no less.

“What?” he says.

“A Kryptonian honing device,” Batman repeats, sounding as if he thinks Hal is stupid, not uncommon. “So he can hone in on Superman, find him. Something we need to do something about.”

Hal decides to take the smart way out and lets the whole thing drop in favor of focusing on the mission. He’s not just telling Barry, but Ollie about this as well.

3. Cyborg

Being in the Justice League isn’t much different than being on the Teen Titans. Like right now, being in a building that could explode at any moment unless he hacks into the system and stops that from happening.

Ah, good old life-threatening pressure.

Batman is fighting some of the goons in the background. They’re on their own here, with the others fighting through an army outside to get to them. But it’s mostly up to them. Batman yells: “Cyborg, status.”

“I’m getting through, but something is bugging me about this whole thing,” Victor calls back. “I think there is someone I’m missing that will allow me to crack this.”

There are a few grunts in the background as Batman fights on, while Victor starts to scan through everyone who worked for the organization, trying to find the missing link.

He is interrupted by Batman, who says: “I took a tour here once. There was an intern, Kyle Paulson, he was kind of sus. Look him up.”

For a second, Victor is thrown by the sus in that sentence, but he quickly focuses back on what’s important. Indeed finding Kyle to be the missing link that gets him to disarm the bomb. While Batman is taking out the last of the bad guys.

In fact, the whole thing slips his mind until he’s writing his mission report, going through the footage to get accurate information in there. Then he pauses again, before dismissing it. Those who trained under Batman are always prepared, maybe it’s not slang but shorthand to be useful in the moment. Or he’s trying to include him, sweet, though unnecessary.

Victor puts it out of his mind.

4. Green Arrow

Ollie doesn’t believe Barry or Hal for a second. Like, really? Batman using slang that the sidekicks are using?

Sure, Nightwing sometimes uses some here and there, but Red Robin is always very professional and Robin is closer to a Shakespearean actor than a TikTok teen. There isn’t anyone else he could have gotten it from and it doesn’t make sense with his whole ‘I am the Night’-persona.

Victor suggested it was to make the newbies more comfortable when he overheard them talking, but that’s even more ridiculous in Ollie’s opinion.

So, he’s not at all in the slightest prepared for Batman’s reaction when he shows him the new arrows he developed. Because Batman’s reaction is: “Hm, serves cunt.”

“Excuse me, what?” Ollie says, his eyes nearly bulging out of his skull.

Batman just stares at him, then in a confused sort of voice goes: “You know, it slays? It’s, you know, good? Positive.”

“Huh, what? No, I- I know what that means. How the fuck do you know?” Ollie splutters.

“I’m Batman,” is all he says. Then he walks away and leaves Ollie to stand there, still frozen in time, because what the hell was that? Batman can’t just do that, can he? That’s illegal. How does he even know that?

What Ollie doesn’t know, is that this was a calculated move. Bruce had overheard the three talking as well and decided to have a little fun. All the times before, it just slipped out in the heat of battle, but this one was purposeful.

Bruce knows Ollie would know what it meant, because billionaires Bruce Wayne and Oliver Queen have done TikTok trends in the past and try to keep up to date, despite their age. Not that Ollie knows it’s him under there.

And last gala, he left Bruce for the wolves – Vicky Vale – so now Bruce is dealing psychological damage to him as petty revenge.

5. Superman (and Practically the Entire League)

They’re in a meeting with most of the Justice League members that are present on earth at the moment. It’s not often they hold such meetings, since they are a little overwhelming and tend to drag on more than be productive.

However, Clark thinks it’s important to ensure there are avenues through which ever member can state their piece and be heard. So, here they are again.

Booster Gold is complaining about always being on the sidelines and never in the heat of the action, even though he’s a great hero. He’s claiming that there is a bias against younger heroes, despite the fact that the ‘old guard’ will have to give it up eventually.

Apparently, Batman has had enough, because he gets up and snaps: “We don’t have bias based on age, we have one based off skill. Maybe if you stopped abandoning your post and being someone reliable, you might get put out in the field more often. Now stop being salty about it.”

It’s silent.

Clark is scrambling his brain, to figure out the meaning. As a journalist he tries to stay up to date on current language use, however, the only person he’s heard use that word is Jon. The boy never explained, but Clark guessed what it means. Doesn’t explain why Batman knows it.

Then the silence gets broken by a snort, everyone’s head whipping towards the source. It’s Nightwing, a newer addition and one affiliated with Batman himself. The only one there brave enough to laugh at Batman, mirthfully asking: “Did you actually say salty?”

There is no change on Batman’s face, but as a longtime friend, Clark knows he isn’t emotionless. Indeed, when he listens close, he can hear the blood rush to his face, blush hidden by the cowl.

“That was not the point of the sentence, Nightwing,” Batman counters, the name a little bit pointed on is tongue.

“Okay, okay,” Nightwing grins easily, showing his hands in surrender, an act which is made null by him adding: “Just pointing out that this is an official meeting. You’re on the record and you know I’m reporting this to the others.”

Red Robin and Robin, Clark fills in mentally, the other two known associates. Everyone already guessed that Nightwing must be close to them as well, since the younger two are closer to being Batman’s children. Now that is confirmed.

“Thank you for reminding me,” Batman says tersely, before quickly pivoting to the next point on the agenda. No one calls him out for it.

However, just because no one calls him out on it, doesn’t mean they drop it. In the weeks after the incident, whispers make their way through the halls of the Watchtower as people speculate why or how Batman came to use the word salty and how out of character it is.

Clark can hear the gossip all over the Watchtower and he’s sure Batman is aware of it too, because some brave souls have asked about. Especially when some of the others talked about the incident not being the first one.

Batman hasn’t replied yet to any of the questions or rumors. Clark thinks he likes the mystery and chaos, likes that they don’t know why the hell he sometimes lets slang slip. Even Nightwing has been seemingly silenced, never commenting with a sort of professional ease at evasion.

Nightwing is the only clue they have, along with Robin and Red Robin, but none of them seem like the culprit.

It just doesn’t make sense and Clark can’t help but have his reporter brain itch.

+1. The Batfamily

There is going to be an attack somewhere in a major city in America tonight. They cannot figure out where, so there is a nation wide stake out at all the important places. Nearly the entire Justice League has been pulled out for it and even then they don’t have enough.

Batman insists on having a skeleton crew remain on the Watchtower in case the threat turns out to be a distraction. And when it is protested, he pulls out an army of associates none of them have ever heard about to fill out the last gaps in their observational net.

The sudden introduction of about six new Gotham vigilantes, which have apparently been operating inside the city as well as outside of it, would have been the main shock if it weren’t for how they are on coms.

Red Robin and Nightwing are known as professionals like Batman, while Robin isn’t a known entity in missions, though those who have met him, know him to be serious. However, with the introduction of the others all of that professionalism melts away.

It starts about 45 minuted into their mission when Spoiler’s voice suddenly crackles over the coms: “I fucking hate stake outs, they’re so boring.”

“I know right, my ass is starting to hurt,” Red Robin – to everyone’s surprise – replies.

“No chatter on the coms,” Batman dutifully reproaches like he always does, but he sounds less stern this time. It’s as if he knows they won’t listen, but says it because it’s his role to do so.

Red Hood ignores Batman completely, idly commenting: “I don’t know, stake outs always hit different for me.”

“That’s just because you’re boring AF,” Spoiler says, an eyeroll practically audible.

“Oi, take that back,” Red Hood says, offended. “I didn’t die to have you slander my name like that!”

This is horrifying news for most of the other people stuck on the coms, however, there is a cacophony of annoyed groans as well. Why anyone would be so blasé about someone mentioning their death, they don’t know.

Until, Robin says: “Cease mentioning your death as excuse. It’s unbecoming to be so reliant on one measly event. You’re not the only one who has died, don’t be – what was it? – ah, yes, don’t be basic, Hood.”

“Yeah, Hood, don’t be salty just because you’re becoming a boring old man,” Red Robin pipes up, sounding smug. That solves the salty mystery.

“Shut up, Replacement,” Red Hood huffs. “I can talk about my death as much as I want to and you can’t stop me.”

“Hood, please, stop talking about your death, you’re going to make B sad,” Nightwing suddenly interjects, stopping the conversation before it can get out of hand.

Those with super hearing will hear Barry mutter in a shocked manner: “Is he talking about Batman?” But he is overshadowed by most of the newly introduced (and already) known Bat-associates booing loudly.

“Don’t be a fucking suck up, Dick” Spoiler hollers, only those in the know picking up on the fact it’s his name. It’s the only time Batman won’t correct them, because not everyone will know it’s a name unless it’s pointed out.

“Periodt,” the quiet voice of Black Bat supports Spoiler.

“Hell yeah, that’s what I’m talking about, BB,” Spoiler cheers when she hears the other girl.

“That was the correct usage?” Black Bat asks.

“It was, well done,” Oracle’s kind voice comes over the coms, from where she is in her lair helping with coordination.

After that it all quiets down again for about half an hour, then Bluebird breaks the quiet again, complaining: “I can’t believe I had to stay behind in Gotham of all places.”

“You live there. Willingly,” Signal answers. “And I had to stay behind too, you know.”

“They’re sleeping on us, Signal, be upset with me,” Bluebird exclaims, indignantly.

“Okay, but tea though,” Spoiler says, most of the Justice League listening in are starting to learn she likes stirring the pot a little.

“Don’t be a simp, Spoils,” Red Robin says.

“Oh, look who’s talking about being a simp,” Red Hood snorts loudly. “I observed you, loser boy, you’re the simp.”

“It’s not as much of the serve you think it is to admit to stalking me,” Red Robin deadpans.

“RR, not to be that bitch, but you’re the OG stalker, maybe- maybe don’t do that,” Nightwing says cautiously, which is apparently funny enough that multiple people start laughing.

Meanwhile Red Robin complains: “Stop laughing at me, when I did it was totally different, I didn’t plan on killing any of you.” Which is mildly disturbing

“Oi, I never planned to actually kill you-kill you either,” Red Hood protests, even more disturbing. The Justice League is starting to wonder why Batman works with the man.

“Stop with the chatter,” Batman interjects again, before it can go further. “It’s not just us on the com lines now. At least try to be professional.”

And much to the horror of the League, who could never imagine doing such a thing, Batman gets booed. Again. This time directly.

Then to add to the horror, Batman doesn’t explode in anger, like everyone would have imagined, instead he just sighs. Defeated. Batman is like a cockroach, he doesn’t get defeated. However, these kids are managing.

Batman remains defeated too, because the Gotham vigilantes continue to idly chat all throughout the next hour. They are definitely bat associated, because they never reveal any information that could be tied to their civilian identity. Instead discussing other missions, general news, funny things they saw on patrol and personal grievances with the others on the line.

If this is what Batman deals with on the day to day, some are starting to see why he would prefer the heroes of the Justice League to keep their mouths shut on missions unless it’s important.

Most try to tune it out and focus on their own stake out, though the voices keep them awake. But they notice when Spoiler’s voice suddenly becomes serious as she reports: “Sus individuals moving towards the Mayor’s office.”

“Received, getting visual on your location,” Oracle’s voice replies, also snapped back into professionalism.

Spoiler reports their appearances and currently location, until Oracle has them, running a check on them, before confirming they have a criminal record and might be thugs for hire. Spoiler says: “I am going to move in.”

Batman says: “Do not engage, Spoiler, they could be a decoy. Try and get more information first.”

“Alright, alright,” Spoiler huffs. Then adds petulantly: “I’m not gonna do it, I was just thinking about it.”

Which sounds pretty reasonable for most listening in, who aren’t of the right age group to know the meme. Batman, however, does know, because he’s been subjected to it multiple times. So, he yells: “Spoiler, no!” startling some members.

A second later, there are sounds of a fight and Spoiler gleefully saying: “I did it.”

Batman lets out a frustrated growl, but Spoiler pays it no mind and she can’t truly get chewed out, because more and more start to report suspicious individuals moving in on the targets they’re watching.

Within minutes of it starting, Nightwing reports: “They’re decoys with targets. Not the main attack, but will do damage if they succeed.”

“Everyone make sure to take out the decoys,” Batman says. “Those without decoys, keep your eyes peeled, you might be at the real target.”

“Done with my targets, moving to help the others now,” Nightwing reports seriously, before he adds: “And can I just say that I’m the GOAT. Dibs on cookies for finishing first.”

“Okay, shade much,” Bluebird says.

“Don’t be arrogant, it’s unbecoming,” Robin retorts as well.

“Yeah, stop flexing,” Spoiler adds. “I’ve wrapped up too, by the way. You’re not special.”

“Let me have this,” Nightwing complains. “You already took all my shit, let me be cool. You all used to think I was cool.”

“Yeah, used to,” Red Hood scoffs. “Then we all realized you’re a looser.”

“Ha, get wrecked,” Red Robin snorts.

“Baby bird, wasn’t I your favorite?” Nightwing asks hurt, though over the top enough to show he is faking it.

“No, sadly, that was Hood,” Red Robin replies, sounding a little like he’s grimacing.

“No cap?” Red Hood asks, surprised.

“No cap,” Red Robin confirms.

“Now I feel kind of bad for you,” Red Hood says, before some bullets are fired. “Wrapped up here, moving to help.”

Red Robin seems glad to not have to reply and none of the other Gothamites do either. With what the League has heard so far, they’re also kind of happy the topic is being dropped, unsure what to think.

Batman’s associates are among the first ones cleaning up, however, soon others are joining them and the true battles grounds – yes, there are multiple targets, these people are organized (Batman will likely obsess until he has tracked down their organization afterwards) – are discovered and heroes move in to fight them.

Throughout the battle, everyone catches snippets of this strange, newly introduced group. A group, who works well together, like an oiled machine, yet obviously made up of highly competent parts that can act on their own as well.

Like Black Bat calling out: “Red Hood, yeet,” before those fighting alongside them see Red Hood boost her into the air, so she can come flying at the terrorists.

But they also make comments about the people they’re fighting and the others that are fighting alongside them.

Signal calling out: “Bluebird is pulling some sick ass moves. Another one for her on the slay-board, Oracle.”

Or Spoiler commenting: “Okay, not to be like that or whatever, but these terrorists are kind of looking snatched.”

To which Batman sighs: “Spoiler, please, no chatter,” in a vain attempt to get them under control.

“What?” Spoiler says. “I can appreciate when they’ve at least tried to pull a fit instead of that usual para-military, ninja type BS.”

“Go off,” Black Bat pipes up again and Spoiler cheers while Batman drops it. Defeated again.

They also check in on each other, with Red Robin hissing in pain, which is immediately followed by Nightwing going: “RR, you good, fam?”

“Gucci,” Red Robin replies. “Just low-key got stabbed.”

“There’s nothing low-key about getting stabbed!” Nightwing exclaims, getting called a hypocrite by many people, while Batman is already calling for Oracle to get a visual and for a medic to head Red Robin’s way.

By the time the battle is over, the Justice League understands how different the team is that Batman usually works with. If they were surrounded by heroes who talked like that continuously, they would have probably picked up some things here and there too.

Still, it fucking weird when Batman checks over his horde, before declaring: “You were all lit out there,” causing multiple of the kids around him to groan loudly, with Bluebird calling Batman a boomer.

Clark, however, sees a small uptick in Batman’s mouth. And in that moment, he knows Batman is doing it on purpose, that he’s enjoying it. That he’s fucking with them. He doesn’t know what to do with that, nor does he think that anyone will believe it. So, he decides to share the amusement and drop it.

They’re never going to figure out Batman.

A/N:

This work is going to get dated so so so fast lmao, but it’s fun rn (if ur commenting in the future, welcome to outdated slang vibes from someone who wasn’t that up to date with current slang when writing it, bc im secretly a grandpa).

Hopefully I didn’t overdo it to an unrealistic degree, but if I did, such is the story that was being told oops

Also this whole fic is just an excuse for me to write batfam banter bc I love it lmao

I didn’t include Batwing, Batwoman and Flamebird here, sorry, but writing the batfam is always so hard bc there are so many characters T-T

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azulaaaaaaah · 22 days

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rating every zuko ship (cause that mf is shipped with everyone)

CLICKBAIT!!! this isn’t every zuko ship just the main ones i immediately lied lol. idk if any of these are hot takes or not but please don’t crucify me (might do a part 2 where it’s azula ships)

Jinko - Zuko/Jin

6/10

awwww it’s cute (for what it is)

and what it is was one singular date that was never really mentioned again

i really appreciate how jin is so unperturbed by zuko’s awkward angst and just genuinely likes him

howevvver she’s kinda one dimensional (as she’s only in like an episode) and i just don’t see this going anywhere longterm

less a ship, more a vehicle for zuko’s character development lol

Jetko- Zuko/Jet

3/10

jet being zuko’s first gay encounter is canon in my eyes

don’t ship them however cause i hate jet with the fire of a thousands suns

similar issues to jin as well where their interactions are extremely limited so personally have no clue how this could be a long term thing

Maiko- Zuko/Mai

5/10

i am so impartial on this ship it’s not even funny.

i get that it’s canon. i get that izumi looks suspiciously like mai so it’s endgame. i just don’t see HOW?? it feels as if the writers realised zutara was becoming popular and were like ‘OH SHIT WE GOTTA DEFUSE THIS SITUATION SOMEHOW’

their relationship is basically just mai being a cold asshole and zuko being an angry asshole and there’s no change or development between EITHER OF THEM

however when they’re cute they’re cute !!!!

‘i love zuko more than i fear you’ COLDEST LINE EVER

however again it’s like - you had a crush on him as a kid. he was BANISHED. you dated for like a month as teens. you argued the whole time. he left again- and shortly after you saved him from prison, but then you were imprisoned partly due to his actions. you get back together again, he becomes the ruler of a country, and then you’re surprised it’s isolating him/making him even more of an asshole???

on the other hand we as a society need to admit that zuko is weirdly possessive of her (ig that’s a positive if ur a booktok romance girlie but im not). like if i was mai i wouldn’t put up with that toxic shit either

at the end of the day, i honestly don’t care that they’re canon lol- but i think they’d probably best as a bitchy best friend duo

Zukaang - Zuko/Aang

1/10

not round here partner. not round here

my first issue is the age gap is objectively extremely weird if examined in canon. leaving it at that

i get that this is grumpy x sunshine in a way the other ships aren’t to me- but we’ve only ever seen these two characters interact with each other when there’s (again) A WEIRD AGE GAP

they are bros in the least homosexual way possible

the cherry on top of this situation is: isn’t aang the reincarnation of his great grandpa? isn’t that giving slight, uh, inc*st vibes??? imagine if people shipped korra and jinora isn’t that just WEIRD???

Zuki - Zuko/Suki

8/10

is this my most controversial take ???

i am a sucker for bodyguard x royal family dynamics guys

and the fact that this is girlboss x malewife is even BETTER

suki seems the most competent at handling his pissy ass in a way the other people on this list aren’t

like she’s real. she’s not sugarcoating his situation, BUT SHES COMPASSIONATE !!

i don’t like throuples typically but suzukki is even eliter than this, which removes the whole ‘going against the bro code’ element that arises from them being together

also i feel like if you haven’t read the comics this doesnt make sense At All so please do

-2 points for the lack of tangible reason to ship them lol

Zutara - Zuko/Katara

7.5/10

okay this one makes the most logistical sense to me within canon (solely examined as a zuko ship not overall)

it really seems as if they were gonna make this canon and swerved circa book 2

LIKE CMONNNN OG ENEMIES TO LOVERS WHERE THE GUY ACTUALLY HAS CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT AND ISN’T JUST EVIL? FIRE X WATER? ITS INTRIGUING

something about this makes me uncomfortable though. (despite the age gap which again a little weird)

something about katara potentially becoming the fire lady is so… icky. she’s a waterbender. the fire nation tried to systematically erase her kind. her mother is killed by the fire nation because they think she’s a waterbender. and katara…. what, becomes part of the royal family? it just seems wrong, and like something she wouldn’t be into

also i feel like their arguments would be a little too NUCLEAR. there’s like, a 50% chance of divorce

she deserves a better ending than that is all i’m saying

to paraphrase the hunger games: katara has plenty of fire herself. SHE NEEDS THAT DANDELION IN THE SPRING MAN

(i’m a kataang truther)

Zukka - Zuko/Sokka

9/10

my zuko related otp!!!

bros to lovers guys, where zuko falls first but sokka falls HARDER !!!

ik this will never be canon and im happy with that. i know there’s not even a whisper of romance between them in the show, but i just think it’s c u t e .

sokka (like suki) is very likely to call zuko out on his shit, but less likely to lose his own shit (like katara)

this in my heart of hearts is 10/10 however is still problematic in a similar way to zutara

his mother is killed by the fire nation and he (presumably) becomes consort ?

however though, i would still say it’s not as ruhroh as zutara bc firstly, sokka isn’t a waterbender, and secondly, ‘consort’ is a lot more open to interpretation than i think fire lady is. in my opinion a consort ≠ a fire lady, just like irl a consort ≠ a queen. it kinda means he can still be ambassador to the southern water tribe/a leader of his own people, while just so happening to be married to the fire lord.

overall i can’t help but stan a friends to lover ship cmOn now

#atla #avatar the last airbender #zutara #zukka #maiko #jetko #jinko #zukaang #zuki #zuko #aang #katara #suki #sokka #shipping discourse #shitpost #kataang

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margotwhites · 2 months

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Jason Todd x Singer reader (fem)

Author's note: I received such a surprisingly positive reply from this! I haven't posted in months, so this caught me off guard completely. (Yes 15 notes is good for me lmao 🥹) In this version, Jason knows who reader are since the beginning. I thought it'd be more fun.

So, basically this a longer version of the first part + a second part. I intend to write this in chapters. Enjoy and please give me your thoughts ❤️

Part two:

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Jason Todd knew one thing or two about twitter. Or X, whatever. The thing is: he's at least three times a month in the trending topics. Not him exactly, but Red Hood. Red Hood is always there.

It goes from people hating on him, to young girls (psycho's in his opinion) calling him babygirl or daddy. He doesn't understands and he doesn't want to. He's not much one from social media, so when he is on the trending topics, normally someone from the family teases him about it.

This time is no different. Dick Grayson and Tim Drake are laughing way too hard. Looking from Tim's phone directly towards Jason. He sighs, closing the book he is reading. Currently they are all comfortably sitting on the library, eating Alfred's cookies and tea.

"What is it?" Jason asks, already regretting the question.

"Open twitter." Tim says, a huge smile on his face. Jason feels a chill down his spine because he knows it's going to be bad. Not that he cares. He doesn't give a shit about public's opinion.

But sometimes the comments about him, the mean comments wishing him to die... Those get to him. So he's prepared for that. For people hating, or for his fangirls fighting deciding who'd be his next imaginary girlfriend.

But he never expected to be shipped with someone else. He knows who you are. Everybody knows who you are. A talented young singer, that ascended till the top in less than three years. Doing some works on modeling from time to time for McQueen or Vogue or Versace, because you're that beautiful.

He wouldn't call himself a fan, but he does think you are musically talented. Anyway, everyone is shipping him with you.

And he doesn't know why.

"Why am I being shipped with her?" He asks, out loud. Before Dick or Tim can answer, Steph bursts into the library's door laughing.

"Jason-"

"I know."

She laughs again. He starts to scroll down the comments, until he finds a video of a live interview you did on Kurt's show, that prick. The journalist is famous for doing weird questions.

"So, everybody knows you have a bit of thing for vigilantism. How did that start?" Kurt asks, crossing his arms and giving the public a charming smile.

"Oh, it started with Batman, of course. I was a little kid when I heard the stories about the man that haunted the nights in Gotham. I am a L.A girl, but either way I absolutely felt enchanted. It's just so cool that is there someone out there that takes justice in their own hands."

Yeah, right. She's a fan of the Batass. Jason scoffs while watching the video, but continues anyway.

"And who is your favorite vigilante?" Kurt asked, leaning closer to her. He was a charming man, young and successful, just like her.

"Oh, Red Hood, definitely." She says that without a hint of sarcasm in her voice. Just a plain, simple answer.

"Red Hood? Isn't he a bit... extreme?" Kurt said, tilting his head.

"I think he is doing good in his own ways, and that is so freaking cool, you know? And I think his motorcycle is super... uh, how can I say? Hot." She says, and gives the public a little giggle. She continues:

"Which doesn't mean I agree with everything he does. But I find his persona interesting and refreshing. He's different from the rest, different approaches and all. It makes me curious about who is the man behind the mask."

"If you could say anything to him, what would you say?" Kurt asks, smiling.

"Oh! I'd probably ask him to take me on a ride with his bike. And to get a girlfriend. I think he needs a feminine touch in his life." She answers, with an amused grin.

The video ends and Jason doesn't really know what to think. You just said he needed a girlfriend. A feminine touch.

The truth is, he can't really disagree. When was the last time he felt a woman's body close to his? More time than he wants to admit. Months. Maybe more than a year. In his defense, it's not that he doesn't have the game. He just don't have the energy to play it.

Steph laughs takes him out of his wandering thoughts. He looks up at his siblings, an irritated expression in his face.

"Read the tweets, the tweets are the best part!" She says, chuckling again. Jason goes straight to the shipping hashtag. People saying they want to be Jason, people saying they want to be you, people saying they want to be the bed where you both - forget it.

He sighs and throws his cellphone on the couch, sitting back and beginning to read his book.

"That's it? That's your reaction?" Dick asks, tilting his head like a curious dog.

"It's just a bunch of tweets. People will forget eventually. Nothing I should worry about." Jason replies, not taking his eyes off The Catcher in the Rye.

Little did he know.

__________________________________________________

Okay. Maybe you shouldn't have said that. Maybe you were dumb and reckless. And now your agent and her team are almost killing you.

It's not your fault. You were always told to be honest, because your fun and outgoing (at least on stage) personality were one of your best traits.

"Are you crazy! This could have led to terrible repercussions. What if everyone focused on the fact that you support a murderer?!" Claya, your agent says, almost shouting.

"Well, they didn't. Now they are just shipping him with me." You say, trying to defend yourself. The truth is, behind the cameras and the stage and all the "popstar" persona you have to pull out, you are an introvert. You have two lifes.

"Yeah, and you should be grateful for it. This can even be a good sign. It seems people are interested in your love life. We can use that for our advantage." Claya says.

You adore her, really. And it's her job to figure it out how to make your career ascend. And she does it very well. But sometimes you just wish it wouldn't be about money or status. It would be just about how to do good music.

Anyway, you don't want to be ungrateful. You're living your childhood dream. So you take those thoughts out of your mind.

"Well, what do you have in mind?" You ask, blinking in confusion.

"We're going to Gotham. You're going to do a show there." Claya says, confidently and typing on her computer.

"Are you out of your mind? Shows in Gotham always go wrong. The Chase Atlantic show from last month was attacked by Pyg!" You say, trying to contain your agent's wicked ideas.

"Honey, don't worry. Maybe Red Hood appears in to save the whole ordeal. It couldn't be better." Claya says, standing up and closing her computer.

Claya and the team leave you alone to think. It's not like you have a lot of choice in the matter, anyway. If she says you're doing the show, you gotta do it.

But it's just a show, right? Nothing to worry about.

Little did you know.

#jason todd #jason todd reader #batfamily #jason todd fanfiction #jason todd deserves better #dc memes #jason todd drabble #jason todd x fem!reader #jason todd x you #jason todd blurb #jason todd fluff #jason todd smut #jason todd headcanon #jason todd imagine #jason todd x female reader #jason todd x reader

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wannaeatramyeon · 1 year

Note

Hello!! Recently found your page and when i tell you i binge read almost all of your lookism content i mean it.

That being said i would love to ask if you could do a scenario where y/n and Goo hate each other but fake date in order to make Gun jealous and of course annoyed (in Goo’s case), however in the end they both fall for each other.

Aww!! THANK YOU FOR READING!! Isn't this community great. Isn't Lookism great.

I LOVE fake date fics! Slight deviation to just trying to prove Gun wrong (the plot is thin, okay).

Goo Kim x Reader: Fake Dating

"Get your hands off me!"

"It's called acting, you bitch!"

"Dumb bastard!"

"Stupid hag!"

"Four eyed fuck!"

"Shit for brains!"

A door slams shut. You and Goo freeze for a brief moment before throwing yourselves at each other. Your lips smash painfully together, and hands wander. It's for authenticity, you see.

(And it works.)

Gun stops in his tracks, "What the fuck?"

You had been chit-chatting as you usually do during one of the lulls in your missions with Gun.

"-and winter weddings are sorta magical, y'know? I like the idea of getting married and having snow falling all around me. But summer with the weather, I-"

Gun has had enough of your mundane chatter. "How the hell do you find the stupidest shit to talk about. You can't even get anyone to date you."

You throw a punch at him, "We dated!"

He dodges your attack, "And we broke up."

"Fuck you, loads of people want to date me!"

Gun peers over his sunglasses at you, he knows you are bullshitting.

Ugh. You'll show this asshole.

"Hey, you big lump," you kick Goo's chair. Oops maybe a bit too hard. You cackle as he tumbles into a heap on the floor.

"AHH! What was that for, you dumb bitch!" Goo gives you the filthiest look.

(On paper you and him should get on like a house on fire. But the first time you met, he had opened his mouth and asked who brought along this pretty little bimbo. You tried to rip out his tongue for that. Well, the rest is history.)

"So..." You eye up the blonde dusting himself off and readjusting his glasses. Is this one of your worst ideas? Probably. "Wanna piss off Gun with me?"

"I don't need you to do that."

"But what if we can take it to new realms of irritation?"

"..."

"I'll pay you."

"Why didn't you say so, Princess! I'm all ears."

Goo had always thought you were a little weird. As if this doesn't prove his point exactly.

Whatever.

He's making money and irritating Gun. Two of his favourite things. Add in beating someone up in there, and it's his holy trinity.

Hmm, maybe he could beat you up after this. That would be fun. He gives you a sly glance as you're explaining the 'fake dating' and what it entails.

Seriously, what an oddball.

After Gun discovers you two all over each other, he turns around and swiftly exits.

He did not care for getting involved in your love life. That ship had long sailed.

The only concerns are with his own sanity.

Having you and Goo together is a dangerously irritating, annoying combination. It doesn't just increase his chance of getting a headache and into trouble two-fold, it increases it exponentially.

...And the fake dating begins.

"Sweetheart, this song reminds me of you!" Goo gives a mocking smile that only you could see.

Gun is sitting in the back while Goo drives and you occupy the passenger's seat. That's fine as far as Gun is concerned. The further he is away from the both of you while you have this little... thing going on the better.

He honestly could not care less. But even listening to you two flirting is like nails on a chalkboard. The headache is returning. He should really invest in some headphones.

"Aww~ You are so sweet!"

You run your hands along Goo's thigh then brutally dig your nails in as you pinch him. This fuck. Did he think you couldn't hear the lyrics? The woman in this song is a useless doormat.

Goo blows you a kiss in return.

"Cupcake!" Goo matches pace with you and goes to hold your hand. You hear Gun's unhappy grumblings from behind. "There's a new hot restaurant that opened up. We should go on a date!"

"I would love that," That really would be thoughtful if you guys were an actual couple.

"We can have a nice night out and walk along the Han river."

"Perfect."

Goo's grip on your hand tightens, he looks deviously at you. Oh no. You prepare yourself for whatever comes out of his mouth next.

"And afterwards we can go back to mine for dessert? You know what I mean? By dessert? That's how everyone phrases it right? To mean we will just fuck all night? With my big, huge, throbbing-"

You hear a stumble and cursing from Gun. You look at Goo and feel him mentally high five-ing you.

Heh. That'll teach Gun for being such a dick. This isn't such a terrible idea after all.

"Sweetheart! Don't I look handsome!"

Gun questioned his life choices.

You and Goo had insisted on running into a designer store for something quick. 'Something quick' had turned into an hour of Goo parading around in suits. And now Gun is waiting sullenly in the corner for you both to finish up whatever the fuck you are doing.

"Hurry the fuck up,"

"Gun, you sourpuss! It's for the HNH function tonight. Goo needs to look his best."

Goo definitely did look good, you'll give him that. The blonde has a great body and a keen eye for fashion.

"Honeybun?" you turn your attention towards your 'boyfriend' as he strides out the fitting room. The suit looks like it was tailored especially for him.

Oh. Has he always been this handsome? You start to think maybe he isn't so bad until-

"You said you'll treat me for showing you a good time last night?"

You must be a better actor than you thought. Your mouth doesn't drop open at his boldfaced lie and your face remains neutral.

This prick. No doubt he's going to rack up an absurd bill and make you pay.

"Let's have a closer look then," you walk over to him, playing the part of a sweet girlfriend. Your hand smooths out the lapel and shirt.

"Silly, your tie is all askew," you adjust the knot and tighten it until it almost chokes this idiot.

Goo doesn't say a word, just looks down at you with a smirk. You feel the urge to wipe it off.

"I do like this one," you say. Your hand reaches out to caress his face. He stills at your unusually tender touch, his next backhanded comment gets stuck in his throat.

You push yourself up on your tiptoes to press your lips to his.

As if on autopilot, Goo's arms moves to circles your waist, pulling you closer and deepening the kiss. Something about the way you fit with him feels natural.

You nip at his lower lip. Hmm, Goo really is a good kisser.

Gun closes his eyes and pinches the bridge of his nose. You two are getting on his fucking nerves. He really shouldn't kick your asses here. He takes a deep breath and counts to ten.

Scratch that, maybe one hundred.

Goo, with his arm around your shoulder, eyes your Uno cards.

He had already won a couple rounds ago, and now you and Gun are determining who between you is the loser.

"No cutie-pie, don't put the green one down. Gun will +2 you!"

"Don't help her out!" Gun growls at you both sitting across from him. He gets awfully testy even with silly games.

You hum and haw at whether to trust Goo as he studies your hand, trying to come up with a strategy.

"Put this one down," he ignores Gun and points at a particular card, "cross my heart babe!"

Fine. You follow his instructions.

Gun huffs and picks up a card from the pile. Guess he couldn't follow your colour or number.

Goo taps twice on his cheek. You giggle and reward him with a loud smooch.

"Like this,"

Goo comes up behind you, pressing himself fully into your back and helping you adjust the grip on the golf club.

You subtly elbow him.

"Watch it," you whisper.

"You're paying for my boyfriend services," he responds under his breath, a grin never leaving his face.

Your voice returns to its normal volume, "I thought I was doing it right?"

"Nooo Princess, your swing is all off!"

He rests his head on your shoulder, actually telling you about where your hands should be and correcting your stance.

If you were a weaker woman, you would be feeling butterflies, and your face would flush. You would think about how sweet Goo could be, and how fun he is in a relationship...

You see Gun from the corner of eye and quickly derail any straying thoughts. Instead, you turn and lightly graze your lips on Goo's cheek and shuffle your hips into his crotch playfully.

Goo, delighted at your movement, chuckles.

Off to the side, Gun facepalms.

You open your mouth obediently as Goo spoonfeeds you.

"Isn't it extra delicious when your Goo-bear is feeding you?" He flutters his eyelashes. God, this guy is so ridiculous you couldn't help but laugh.

"Do you have to fucking do that? I'm trying to eat here." Gun glares at the display.

"Don't be jealous just because you'll never know love like this!" Goo snaps before feeding you another mouthful.

Gun rolls his eyes. Why does Charles curse him with the most idiotic partners.

"Yeah I'll just pay for mine and the wifey's food," Goo smiles at the waitress, handing over some cash.

"Just pay for it all you cheap asshole!" Gun is exasperated. It's a goddamn hole-in-the-wall, not some fine dining establishment. The total is pocket change.

"Nope!"

"You fucking-"

The waitress clears her throat awkwardly.

"Pay for it yourself, you prick," Goo retorts as he nuzzles into your neck.

Gun angrily slams down some money.

"What's this?"

So much for doing work. Goo loudly makes an entrance into your office and wafts a piece of paper in front of your face. You snatch it irritably.

"My invoice!"

What? This wasn't the duration that was agreed.

You narrow your eyes at him, "But we're not done yet!"

"No, we're not."

"So?"

"So I thought I'll give you a 100% discount for the foreseeable, sweetheart."

Your eyebrows knit together. Does this mean what you think it means?

Goo is a picture of nonchalance, he perches on your desk as he examines his nails.

"You mean you actually want to...?"

"I'm having a good time. You look like you are too."

Hmm, you couldn't deny it. And you never thought kissing him could be so pleasant.

"So we're really...?"

Goo gives you a smile and a casual shrug. "If you want to, Princess."

How does nothing ruffle his feathers. How can he be so relaxed about this?

You mull it over. What's the worst that could happen? The last few weeks have been undeniably fun. You don't think you had ever laughed so much.

You school your expression and give him a nod.

Goo's easy smile turns into a toothy grin. He pulls you close and kisses you, like all the times he had before. But this one feels sweeter. Real.

Goo fucking Kim is actually your boyfriend. Who would have thought?

When you finally pull away, you both stay within touching distance, beaming at each other like morons.

"Bastard."

"Bimbo."

Goo suddenly frowns, and the magic breaks. "This doesn't change anything. You still need to pay the bill!"

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stars-n-spice · 2 months

Text

Thoughts on s3 ep 07!

fuckin bitchass episode broke my "no crying streak" of fuckin,, one episode, fuck you

anyways,, y'all know the drill,, spoilers and me screaming under the cut!

i love commander wolffe so much

when the clone assassin (who is Tech,, let's just be honest here,,) got out from under the rocks I was like, "Hey what the fuck,, that should've KILLED you" and was also like "ok so that's definitely Tech, why the fuck does he keep coming back??"

wolffe being like "these are clones" gave me so much hope,, baby I hope you come around and join your brothers,, I am BEGGING

something something,, being defective,, not following orders,, the clone assassin operative,, yeah,,

uGH wolffe looks so so so good in TBB animation

Batcher licking Nemec :(

Crosshair does a lot of,,, "I'll handle it",, he wants to feel useful I'm - :(((((

shakey hands,, ughhhh

the "operative" is surviving WAY too much for him not to be important

"we need to go" - "we're waitin on you" :(((

"she only bites half of the time" OH MY GOD,, PLEASE

I love you Batcher, you are the best girl

GET YOUR FUCKING DOG BITCH - IT DON'T BITE - YES IT DO,,

lmao i really thought they were going to get away and then they got fucking shot down,,

Wrecker's groan when Batcher jumped on him to get out of the ship asldkf;a

I'm so happy about Wrecker not getting a lot of screen time but I'm also not,, because to me less screen time means less of a chance of him dying or something but it also means less of me getting to see him

but everything he does on screen is wonderful,, he's amazing and I love him and he could just be standing there in the background just breathing and i'll be acting like he just blew up the death star or something

CROSSHAIR IS SUCH A GIRL DAD

I cannot get over Crosshair and Omega's dynamic oh my GOD

Star wars, you can't give us this good of a dynamic for only ONE season,, PLEASE let them survive

him checking up on her,, making sure she has all her things and sticks close :((( FUCK

I love how it sounds like it's physically hurting Crosshair to ask Omega if she's good and has her things together,, that's so funny to me

"You're just as bad as Hunter" - "Oh, I'm much worse." OH MY GOD.

screaming crying throwing up

i went, "Nemec and Howzer better not die" AND THEN LIKE TWO MINUTES LATER NEMEC GOT FUCKING SNIPED

i was so mad

CMON

Howzer changing his mind about Crosshair :(( wondering if he's thinking about Hera :((((

"Loyalty meant something to me" UGHHHHH, fucking,, AGGUHHH,, the essays that could be written on Crosshair and loyalty,, FUCK

oh the way Crosshair is as open as he is to talk about what happened :(((

godDAAMMNN

when Wrecker did the thing,, where,, he like,,, he um,, y'know,, like the,, move where,, and he,, he bashes,, bashes uh the two,,, bashes two heads together,, and knocks them unconscious,, hmm, yeah,,,

WRECKER PROTECTING BATCHER?!?!

that man is perfect oh my god,, fucking HELL,, I want him so badly,,

"I don't like that idea" - "too bad" AGHHHH YOUR HONOR I LOVE THEM SO MUCH

something something Crosshair doing the most to feel useful and needed UGGHHH

hey is it just me or did the animation for the water with the waterfall look,, like,, weird?? or strange?? idk,, it just seemed off to me

ALSO THAT FIGHT?? fuck that was cool

also if that really is Tech,, Crosshair got his ass handed to him by Tech lmao

BUT ALSO IF THAT WAS TECH,, the fucking angst man,, he seriously almost killed Crosshair,, holy shit

Howzer's new look is so,, MMh,, the,, fuck,, the holster straps on his thighs,,, the pouch on his chest,, ughh

the fact that these operatives like,, KNOW Crosshair,, they KNOW he went through the program and didn't comply the way he should've,, idk,, it's just,,

"you chose the wrong side" FUCKING LEAVE HIM ALONE MAN YOU'RE GOING TO KEEP MAKING HIM QUESTION SHIT AND HIS PLACE IN EVERYTHING FUUUCCCKK

Crosshair looked fucking terrified during that fight and for good reason too he was getting his ASS handed to him (granted he doesn't have much of one but still-)

also,, him being not super great in hand to hand combat got me thinking because,, dude's a sniper,, he keeps his distance,, his thing is long range shit,, and fucking,, boy if that doesn't reflect on his character,, not wanting to get close,, keeping a distance,, MAN

HOWZER TO THE RESCUE <33

for the like,, third time my assurance that this operative is Tech was ruined as he fell down that waterfall but I am a fucking FOOL

Crosshair said "thanks" that's fucking crazy

OH I'M SO HAPPY ABOUT REX AND WOLFFE HAVING A FACE TO FACE TALK (hunter and Cross take notes)

UGGHHH SO HAPPY I GOT TO SEE WOLFFE'S BEAUTIFUL FACE

i was so scared when Wolffe was like "I'm a soldier of the Empire" BABY YOU'RE NOT

PLO KOON COME GET YOUR SON AND FORCE GHOST TALK SOME SENSE INTO HIS FINE ASS

but then he let them go :((

Gregor showed up on the screen and I fucking,,, I fucking swooned

wolffe is going to be in SO much trouble after this,, oh my god,, I'm so scared for him

BUT THAT BETTER NOT BE THE LAST TIME WE SEE HIM FUCKING HELL

did i mention how fucking fine Wolffe looks in TBB animation??

there's so many fucking wide shots of,, characters on opposite ends of each other,, like,, fucking hell,, i get it

WE GOT THE SEELOS TRIO IN A SCENE TOGETHER AGUUHHHH

Gregor you are so fine

his new armor,, ughh

WOLFFE fucking,, mmmh,, shit

fucking knew the operative would survive that shit,, fucking hell

alrighty folk BUCKLE up,, seems like the next episodes we're going to start getting some confirmations about Omega!

cried when Rex and Wolffe were talking to each other

i was so happy the "i thought the end of the war would be the end to losing our brothers" conversation from the trailer was here because I was scared it was going to be a conversation that was going to happen after losing Echo or something,,, for now he's safe

ugh,, i already miss wolffe

#tbb #tbb s3 #tbb spoilers #tbb s3 spoilers #the bad batch #bad batch #tbb hunter #tbb crosshair #tbb echo #tbb wrecker #tbb omega #captain rex #captain howzer #commander wolffe

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phoenixyfriend · 6 months

Note

If you still do the ask meme: nr.1 for a timetravel Jangosoka?

26 Family Prompts Ask Meme

Accidental Baby Acquisition

This contains both intentional and accidental acquisition. (They'll give it back! Probably.)

------------------

"He's mine."

Jango looks at the woman he has, somehow, managed to fall for.

He looks at the baby.

He looks at her again.

"You adopted? Without asking me?"

"No, birthed him myself."

That baby is human. Fully human. There is no chance, in any way, that Ahsoka managed to have a fully human child. There's some shit about placentas or whatever. A tog can't surrogate a human and vice versa.

"Jetii--"

"Oh, I'm in trouble," she giggles, entirely too enthused about his annoyance.

"Jetii," he tries again, "please tell me you didn't steal a child."

"I did not steal a child," she confirms. "I just... acquired one."

"Acquired one."

"Yeah."

He waits in vain. He breaks and asks, "Ahsoka, how did you acquire this child?"

She smiles at him.

The child's name is Ferus Olin. He was not stolen, but given willingly by his parents for Ahsoka to take to the Jedi Temple on Coruscant.

"You could have just said so," Jango gripes as he fires up the engines. She laughs at him, and hikes the tot higher on her hip. "Don't act like it's not within the realm of possibility that you'd randomly pick up a kid and forget to warn me about it."

"Sure," she says, "but consider this: it was funny."

"You are not nearly as funny as you think you are."

Ahsoka rolls her eyes and addresses the kid instead. "What do you think, Ferus? Am I funny?"

The toddler--baby, really--stares up at her silently. There is something up with that kid, but Jango figures that's par for the course with Force Sensitives.

A slightly wet, very chubby hand lands on a lekku.

"That is saliva," Jango notes aloud, mostly because Ahsoka looks a little disgusted, and likes she's trying to hide it from the kid. "Baby drool."

"Oh, fu--shove off."

"Classy."

So like. Here's the thing. About carting around two almost-Jedi:

One of them is his age, and hot, and weird, and he's a little bit in love with her.

The other one is less than a year old, and should be relatively safe and sound to leave alone for five minutes while napping so they can do things like use the bathroom, or argue over the nav, or knock against the walls doing things that babies probably shouldn't know about.

Ahsoka says that Ferus was a rule-abiding guy in the future, uptight, even.

This means nothing, because the ship jolts out of hyperspace without warning while Jango's got his hand up a hot tog's skirt, and they both have to rush to the cockpit to find the literal baby has crawled onto the pilot's seat and somehow turned off the nav.

The baby continues patting, full-palm, at the controls.

"What the fuck?" Jango demands.

"Language," Ahsoka sniffs, and then picks up the baby and swings him around. "Who's a little troublemaker? You are!"

"What the actual--"

"Language!" Ahsoka snaps, a little harsher this time. "There's a baby."

"Yes, I noticed, it just knocked us out of hyperspace."

Ahsoka rolls her eyes. "It's fine. We just need to keep a better eye on him."

"This could have been deadly."

"Eh, doubt it," she dismisses. "I mean, with a normal kid, yeah, but I bet you ten to one odds that he did this because the Force told him to."

"I cannot explain how much that doesn't fill me with confidence."

She ignores him. She settles into the chair, toddler on her lap, and closes her eyes. This lasts for several minutes, and Jango tries to keep his impatience under control so he doesn't 'project' it into the Force or whatever it is that the Jedi are worried about. It would distract Ahsoka, and possibly more importantly, it would upset the baby.

"I've got it," she finally says. "A direction. He pulled us out a bit early, but the fact that we didn't overshoot it is a bit of a shocker in and of itself."

"A direction to what?"

She shrugs. "We'll find out."

The direction is to a fresh-faced teenage Duros by the name of Cad Bane, who's been floating around the guild's gossip lines for a few years now. He's good, for eighteen, but Jango hasn't met him before, and Ahsoka really doesn't like him--Jedi don't hate, supposedly--and that's enough for Jango to have zero interest in really networking here.

Also, Bane has a stolen toddler. Jango knows the toddler is stolen, because she's dressed in far-too-fancy clothes for Bane to bother with, and screaming her head off, and trying to bite him, and yelling about how she wants to go home. Surprisingly eloquent for a toddler, actually. She can't be more than four.

Jango wants to get involved. He's itching for a fight. He does not get one.

He gets the smaller baby, and is told to take care of said baby and be ready to catch the bigger baby--toddler--while Ahsoka handles the fighting.

It seems kinda personal. Jango leaves her to it. It's not like they need both of them to fight this literal teenager.

(He's right. They don't.)

There are now two small children on Jango's ship. One of them is barely-almost a toddler, and the other is barely-almost not.

"I am Padme Naberrie of Naboo," the little girl tells him, all care and important grandeur. "Thank you for saving me. When may I return home?"

Naboo. The noble kids from there are damn creepy. Also worth a good ransom or a better bounty, to some. It's not exactly surprising that Bane went for one of them. the family must be pretty influential somehow.

"Not sure," Ahsoka says. "We were on our way to Coruscant... do you have a number we can call? Maybe one of your parents can meet us on the way."

"That is ac-cep-table," the little girl sounds out. She even bows, a touch wobbly. "Thank you, Master Jedi."

Ahsoka is not a Master, and is only sort of a Jedi. She does not correct little Padme, because that would be a little mean, in Jango's estimate. The girl's just been through something harrowing, and even he's not that much of a dick.

"Do you know their contact info?" he asks instead.

They aren't on a convenient hyperlane for Naboo, so they're meeting Lady Naberrie on Corellia. It's several days there, which is still faster than trying to get to Naboo from where they currently are, and Padme spends an hour or two talking to her mother before the woman enters hyperspace and comms are no longer an option. Then she talks to her father, and asks about someone called Sola, and Jango's not paying enough attention to keep track of who's who in the life of a child that is not his.

He doesn't have enough beds on the ship for this.

He empties out a small armor crate and lines it with blankets, then sets it on teh floor by the end of his bed. It's big enough for Ferus, who probably doesn't care much for fancy things. Padme gets her own bed, because they're strangers and it would be odd to suggest she share with Ahsoka as a gender thing. The other, larger bed is then for Jango and his somewhat irritating and entirely too lovely Jedi.

He laces his fingers with hers, once they're in bed, autopiloting down the hyperlane. Padm's breathing has finally evened out, and Ferus hasn't woken up yet either.

"Do you want them?" he asks.

"Hm?" Ahsoka shifts, and when she speaks, it's sleep-heavy and muddled. "Want what?"

"Kids," he says.

She's silent, long enough that he starts to wonder if she's fallen asleep, but eventually she shrugs. "I'll take an apprentice one day, probably."

It's basically the same thing, for Jedi.

"Did I ever..."

He tries not to ask too much about his personal future. He knows how Galidraan would have ended, and knows that somehow, he had been involved in a clone army that tried to kill Ahsoka when she was seventeen. She tries not to tell him too much.

"One," she says. "Boba. A few years younger than me. And..."

She doesn't finish.

"And?"

"Maybe another time," she says.

He's gotten that response more than once. He knows it for the wall it is.

"Alright," he says. "You could... tell me about Boba in the morning?"

"Maybe."

Noncommittal. He's not entirely surprised.

"Okay," he finally says. He presses a kiss to her lek. "Goodnight, Ahsoka."

"Night, Jango."

#JangoSoka is a whole lot of 'she does things without explaining and he follows in her wake being impressed and kinda annoyed'#jangosoka #jango fett #ahsoka tano #time travel #ferus olin #padme naberrie #padme amidala #baby characters #star wars #sw legends #the clone wars #phoenix answers memes #phoenix files

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acescorazon · 4 months

Text

Title: Changes

Chapter: 9/?

Rating: M

Word Count: 2972

Chapter Excerpt:

Okay, yeah, he gets it.

“I’m supposed to be an emperor of the sea,” Buggy giggles, “And that’s my ship? That’s what's supposed to incite fear into the Marines? Okay, even I think that’s kind of funny.” He says and when he turns and looks at Mihawk, he’s silent now and just staring at Buggy as he laughs. Did… did I do something wrong, Buggy instantly thinks, sensing a sudden change in the mood. Was… Was he not supposed to laugh along… or…? “Uh, what’s wrong…?” Buggy asks, instantly forcing himself to stop laughing. Maybe… Maybe Mihawk just doesn’t like the sound of his laugh? Mihawk never likes anything Buggy says or does, so maybe that’s it. Maybe it was all fun and games until Buggy actually started to laugh, and now Mihawk’s annoyed by him again.

Mihawk blinks, looking slightly startled for some reason, “Oh, nothing.” He mutters, turning his head away as he reaches for his wine again, “I was just thinking about something…” Oh… Like how Buggy has an annoying laugh that’s super obnoxious. One that makes him want to punch Buggy in the face and regret that he even asked him to this dinner, right? Those kinds of thoughts, right?

|Ch1|Ch2|Ch3|Ch4|Ch5|Ch6|Ch7|Ch8|

Mihawk’s tent is quiet except for the occasional sound of silverware clanking against metal trays, and Buggy doesn’t think he’s ever had a more awkward dinner before. He sits at the very end of the couch, far away from Mihawk, quietly eating his meal as he continues to wonder why he’s even here. Mihawk greeted him when he first came in, but he’s been completely silent since then. Wasn’t he the one who wanted to talk things out? So, why is he being so quiet now…? Not that Buggy really cares, but still… He thought there’d be a lot more talking going on.

Just as he has that thought, Mihawk clears his throat, “Uh, so how was your day?” He asks, and Buggy glances over at him for a split second before looking away. How was his day…? Who gives a shit? If there’s one thing Buggy hates, it’s a bunch of pointless small talk. Still, he needs to put effort into being Mihawk's friend, whether he likes it or not.

Buggy swallows down a mouthful of his sea king before slowly replying, “...Good…how was yours?” He asks, not saying any more or any less than that.

“....Good.”

They exchange brief glances again, and Buggy cracks first, looking back down at his dinner tray a minute later. He’s unsure of what he should even say. Maybe he can talk about tonight’s dinner, but then again, there’s not much to say about it. It’s decent and that’s putting things nicely. Uh, what else could he talk or ask about…? Buggy takes a moment to think, but any potential conversation he could strike up with Mihawk eludes him, which is weird because Buggy has always been good at running his mouth, especially when it comes to things related to himself.

“The weather is nice this evening,” Mihawk states, and Buggy holds back a groan that’s building in his chest. Ugh, Buggy doesn’t want to talk about the boring old weather like a bunch of boring old men. The weather on Emptee Bluffs Island is always the same, warm and sunny, what’s there to talk about?! Still, Buggy nods, “Yeah, there’s a nice breeze tonight.” He replies, and Mihawk hums in response, and after that, the conversation is effectively dead and buried.

Buggy hates this, he's so bored and uncomfortable.

He looks around Mihawk’s tent, and there’s nothing remarkable about it. Mihawk’s been on the island for a couple of months, but he hasn’t bothered to decorate his new home at all. It’s devoid of all personality and basically looks more or less like something akin to a guest bedroom rather than someone’s actual bedroom that they sleep in. Buggy spots a couple of books stacked on Mihawk’s nightstand and his sword is tucked neatly away in a corner, leaning against his dresser, but other than that, the tent is pretty much spotless and empty with only the bed, the couch, and a few other small pieces of furniture in the room.

Mihawk reaches for his glass of red wine on the coffee table in front of the couch, “I asked Crocodile if he wanted to join us earlier.” He states as he grabs his glass and then takes a sip of his wine. As soon as Buggy hears Crocodile’s name, he tenses up. God, is he coming? No, no, he’d never come because he hates Buggy… But what if he does come… is this a trap? Are they going to beat Buggy u–

Mihawk sighs, shaking his head, “I don’t think he’ll be coming, though.” He says, and as soon as he does, Buggy releases a shaky sigh of relief. Oh, thank god, he thinks. He had a hard enough time trying to gather up the courage just to have dinner with Mihawk, he doesn't know if he'd have it in him to have dinner with Crocodile too. "He and I have been fighting a lot recently,” Mihawk mutters quietly, sitting his wine back down, “He’s just too stubborn for his own good.”

Buggy really doesn’t care about Hawkeye and Crocodile’s relationship. If they have a falling out and then disband Cross Guild then it might be the best thing to happen to Buggy yet, but then again, it could always result in Crocodile cruelly selling Buggy off like he said he would. Who’s to say what would happen if Cross Guild actually disbanded but maybe life would be slightly better regardless if it meant that Buggy was finally able to get away from Mihawk and Crocodile.

There is a part of him that’s curious though, and it’s not like he has anything better to talk about at the moment, so in a tiny voice he asks Mihawk to elaborate, “Why are you guys fighting?” He asks, hoping that Mihawk won’t snap at him and call him nosey or something, and then beat him up, “I’m not trying to be nosey or anything, I’m just curious. You guys seemed to be on really good terms until recently…”

Mihawk is quiet for a moment, and Buggy really starts to think that maybe he unintentionally pissed Mihawk off, until said man turns and looks at him again, “Oh, it’s nothing really.” He insists, “I just don’t like how he’s been acting recently… let’s just leave it at that.”

“Yeah, he’s a dick.” Buggy blurts, and a moment later breaks out into a cold sweat. He did not just say that. He did not just say that out loud. Good, god, he did not just say that out loud. He takes a deep breath and slowly peeks over at Mihawk, trying to gauge his reaction. It’s no use though, Mihawk’s face is completely unreadable. “Uh, sorry. I didn’t mean to say that, it just slipped out, and I… please don’t be mad at me.” He adds quickly.

“He’s not that bad when you get to know him,” Mihawk says slowly, almost cautiously, “I know he might seem like he’s a horrible person, but he has a good side just like you and I.” Okay, sure, Buggy will believe that when he sees it. He wants to scoff and tell Mihawk he’s full of shit, but he doesn’t for obvious reasons. “Crocodile is just extremely hot-headed, I’m afraid, and he often lets his emotions get the best of him.”

Whatever, Buggy thinks, looking down at his tray. He only has a couple of more bites of food left, and he thinks that he’ll just finish it off and tell Mihawk he’s going to leave because he’s tired or something. Things could be going a lot worse, but he still doesn’t want to be here. “His tantrums are funny at times, actually,” Mihawk adds, chuckling quietly. How could Crocodile’s violent outbursts be considered funny little temper tantrums? They’re horrifying, and Buggy’s been on the receiving end of Crocodile’s fury one too many times, so he doesn’t understand what’s so funny about any of this.

Still, Mihawk continues to chuckle to himself, “Like when he saw that new ship.” He says, “He got so mad and red in the face, and it kind of looked like his head was going to explode.” That… That wasn’t funny. Nothing about that day was funny, actually, and Buggy really thought that Crocodile was going to kill him after he saw their flagship.

Oh, to have the courage and strength Mihawk has.

“Yeah…” Buggy mutters quietly, unsure of how he’s even supposed to go about the very topic that gives him such horrible memories. He just kind of wants to forget that it all happened and change the subject to something random, but then Mihawk speaks up again, “You know, now that I think about it, the clown ship is kind of funny.” Huh? He thinks the ship is funny now? Is he drunk? Didn’t he call it hideous? Didn’t he hate it as much as Crocodile did? Why is it funny all of a sudden?

“The idea of three of the most fearsome pirates in the world traveling around in a boat with a giant clown as its figurehead is so ridiculous, it’s funny.” Mihawk says, and as soon as Buggy pictures it, though he still associates the ship with bad memories, he can’t help but chuckle a little. Yeah, okay, yeah, it is funny. The idea of a notorious group of pirates like Cross Guild traveling from island to island on a boat with circus tents and a clown figurehead that looks just like Buggy is kind of funny, and even funnier when you think about how the Marines will still take them as a serious threat even in their ridiculous ship.

Okay, yeah, he gets it.

Buggy’s brain takes a minute to process the… compliment? Yes, that was definitely a compliment, and he struggles to figure out if Mihawk’s telling the truth or not. It just seems too good to be true. How can he go from saying Buggy’s men are useless to saying he’s proud of them in such a short time…? “Do you actually mean that… or…?” Buggy asks in a tight, tiny voice. He holds his breath as he waits for Mihawk’s next words.

Mihawk nods his head, “They’re a handful sometimes, but honestly… Being around your men gives me a sort of nostalgic feeling. They remind me of a pair of rowdy kids i spent a couple of years looking after…” He says, smiling slightly. He chuckles again, “It’s been such a long time since i trained anyone, and, honestly, part of me missed it.” Is…Is he being serious right now? “There’s something so satisfying about taking someone under your wing and watching them improve right before your eyes…I don’t know… I just missed it.”

Buggy remains silent for a long moment, and now he’s the one staring at Mihawk, baffled at everything that Mihawk just said to him. He wants to question if everything that Mihawk is saying is true, but he gets the feeling that Mihawk is genuinely opening up to him for once, and he doesn’t know how to feel about that, at least not right now. “Oh, i see.” Buggy nods, “So, you actually enjoy training my crew…”

“I do.” Mihawk confirms, smiling as he does so, “I find their antics… charming at times, actually.” He says and then proceeds to tell Buggy a couple of stories from their training sessions. Buggy was a little skeptical at first, but the more that Buggy listens to Mihawk, the more he feels like maybe he was wrong.

Mihawk's voice is soft and quiet as he rambles on about Buggy's crew, and for the first time all night, Mihawk is actually talking about something Buggy's passionate about. There are two things Buggy likes to talk about: Himself and his children. So naturally as soon as he realizes that Mihawk's being genuine, he starts putting a little more effort into the conversation, sharing his own stories about his men and all their silly little antics, and Mihawk listens with bright, attentive eyes, leaning closer and looking like he actually cares about what Buggy has to say.

It's…weird… Everything's still so weird, but this one little thing puts Buggy's worried mind at rest for the time being and he finds himself relaxing a little. He finishes his meal, and somewhere at the back of his head he knows he's done eating and that he should wrap things up and go to bed, but instead he… He puts his tray on Mihawk's coffee table, continuing to listen to Mihawk as he talks, now about how Buggy's men asked him if he'd like to join them for dinner sometime.

Buggy's men are so cute… he really does love his crew! Who else would have the courage to ask the world's strongest swordsman to a meal? They know damn well what kind of person Mihawk is but they just don't seem to care! They're so fearless, and it makes Buggy proud. He laughs at the thought of his men grabbing a rather confused Mihawk by the arm and leading him to the cafeteria to eat with them and chat his head off.

Cute. They're just so cute and they bring Buggy so much joy and happiness...

Buggy looks up in the middle of his giggle fit only to find Mihawk staring at him again, no this time it looks like he's staring at Buggy's mouth, and he briefly wonders If he has something on his face like sauce his meal, but when he asks Mihawk about it, he shakes his head, replying in a rather nonchalant matter, "No." He tells him, and afterwards, he locks eyes with Buggy, and Buggy's brain scrambles to process the situation. Buggy can't hold his gaze, so he looks back down at his lap … What is he looking at then? Buggy wonders, and at that moment, he has the weirdest thought, but he quickly pushes that idea down because there’s just no way…

His brain briefly considers the possibility that Mihawk was looking at his lips, but there's no way. He doesn't even know why he had an idea like that, actually. It's so weird, and the idea makes Buggy's skin crawl slightly.

Buggy shifts uncomfortably in his seat and in the process, he brushes his knee against Mihawk's. He pauses for a second, trying to figure out when he and Mihawk got so close to each other, surely Buggy wasn't the one who moved, but… the idea of Mihawk inching closer to Buggy of all people is…stupid… it's ridiculous. Maybe they were a lot closer than Buggy thought they originally were. Yeah.

"Um," Buggy says softly, once again finding himself in the same awkward situation as before. He no longer knows what to say, but the silence feels so weird now. "So, uhm, you're really serious about wanting you, me, and Crocodile to start over…?" He asks.

"Mhm."

"Even though I'm a pathetic, useless coward?"

"You're not so bad," Mihawk replies, "We're a little different, but I think we can get along for the sake of Cross Guild." Huh? Seriously? "It might take a little while, but maybe after spending some time together we'll come to like each other." The idea of Buggy liking Mihawk is such a bizarre concept, he can't imagine any reality where he actually enjoys Mihawk's company and considers him his friend, still for the sake of his own well being he nods slowly, "Yeah…" he mutters, tucking a strand of hair behind his ear, "Yeah, that'd be nice… " he mutters, though he's not sure if he fully believes himself.

"Now that we've talked a little… I actually find you quite charming." Mihawk confesses, and Buggy finds himself smiling at the comment.

Wait.

Wait….

In an instant, Buggy grows confused. One, by Mihawk's compliment, and two, by his own reaction. Did Buggy really just… did he really just smile at Mihawk of a people?! Did he really give him a genuine smile and not one of those fake ones he puts on all the time…? Buggy eyes go wide as he tries to figure out what the hell is going on. Oh, this is weirding him out so bad. "Uh, I think I'm going to head back to my room now….uh, I had…fun?" He says, but it sounds more like a question than anything.

"Oh, uh…" Mihawk replies, again looking slightly caught off guard, "Oh. Already?" He asks.

"Uh, yeah…" Buggy nods, "I'm kind of tired…" It's a lie, and not a very good one but that momentarily comfort he felt around Mihawk is gone again, and replaced with a new feeling of confusion and maybe even a hint of embarrassment, but he's not sure why.

"Oh… I understand…" Mihawk chuckles nervously, rubbing the back of his head, "Right… it is getting a little late…"

The truth of the matter is, Buggy's pretty sure that it's not even ten o'clock yet, but that doesn't matter. He reaches for his tray on the coffee table, only for Mihawk to stop him, and offer to take it back to the cafeteria for him, and Buggy gives him a sheepish grin, thanking him and then standing up afterward.

Mihawk stands up as soon as Buggy does, "Buggy…" he calls out, and Buggy swears that this is one of the few times Mihawk's actually called him by his name, and he sounds strangely gentle right now, "Uh, let me walk you back to your sleeping quarters."

….huh?....why?

((A/N: Y'ALL MIND IF I SCREAM. AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH, Thank you. If you squint you can see the exact moment Mihawk starts feeling some type of way about Buggy and OOF.))

#cross guild #changes #my writing #screaming crying throwing up #if only i wasnt destined to ruin buggys happiness

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bruiserelliot · 4 months

Text

I'm absolutely obsessed with the @professorhephaestus Solar Trials world and I love me some good hurt/comfort so I tried to do full comfort.

Context: the trio (Jenny, Teddy, and Eigan fought a big bear made of ice or something on Pluto and got good hits in and won but still got their asses kicked and this is some time after that)

Teddy groaned as he opened his eyes, trying to get his eardrums to work again. He could smell that really clean wood smell that came from the infirmary. Oh, that's good, ship was good.

Less good was the way everything felt heavy, just just really heavy and achey. And cold. Ohh, cold. Right.

Note to self: don't fight a space ice bear with a shit casting wheel. Bad time.

Any other note taking that might've gone on in his head stopped when a bright light shone in his eyes. He squinted at the person he could now see standing over him.

"Eigan?"

"I'm afraid not, Theodore, the prince is still recovering from your... unfortunate encounter with the Ursa Polaris." Teddy rubbed at his eyes, resisting the urge to groan again when he was finally able to get his vision to focus on professor Hephaestus. He looked... Weird. Like, less put together than usual. Course for him that meant a few locs out of place and a wrinkle or two in his fancy cloak, but like, Teddy could see it.

"You three, I take my eyes off you for a second and boom, gone. Off fightin a polar bear," a grumble came from beside the professor, and thankfully with a little less effort, Teddy could see captain Aubrey. "I'm glad you and Jenny noticed Eigan wanderin off but maybe next time bring him back instead'a followin him."

"Sorry doc, gotta do it, for science. No, woman, or martian left behind," Teddy replied, not bothering to sit up, or acknowledge the small smile Captain Aubrey graced him with.

Oh shit, no woman left behind. "Is Jenny-"

"She's fine, Teddy, pulled the two of you outta trouble with that cast of flame."

"Truly exemplary work," professor Hephaestus said. Teddy closed his eyes, ready for the inevitable comparison, but it didn't come. Small mercies.

He looked down at the thick blanket covering him.

"Thanks. That, that's good. Glad she's okay... Eigan's okay, right?" He fiddled with the blanket's edge.

"Eigan's resting up in his room. Finally got him to lie down," captain Aubrey muttered, sounding further away, then close again. "Stubborn kid didn't wanna leave you alone." He smiled down at Teddy and Teddy absolutely did not blush, no, no he didn't. Absolutely not. He was feverish, definitely feverish. Yeah, from fighting the ice bear.

"Theodore, I must commend you for your quick thinking in battling the Ursa Polaris," the professor spoke up. "A large, though admittedly ineffective casting wheel, was... Clever."

Teddy opened his eyes, blinking the spots away as he focused on the professor. Was that? A compliment?

The professor wasn't meeting his eyes, and his Rector crook was turning a bit in his hands. Shit was the prof being nice? Had he been worried? Y'know what, no, his head hurt too much for this, he was probably worried about Eigan and Jenny, and Teddy... Well he apparently did something right.

He could live with that.

"Uh... Thanks? I think."

"You're welcome. Kindly recuperate in a timely manner... If possible." Teddy raised an eyebrow as the Martian left, fixing his locs on the way out. Captain Aubrey chuckled.

"That man, I swear sometimes." He turned back to Teddy. "What he means is, ya done good kid. Feel better, and quit worryin us." He passed Teddy a mug of tea, helping the boy sit up. Teddy gratefully held his chilled nose over the tea. Thank god for Captain Aubrey, martian social skills were tough to decipher on a good day. Give him Dr. Aubrey's good ol' southern hospitality to smooth everything over any day.

"Thanks doc."

"Sure kid."

#solar trials #teddy knight #professor Hephaestus #he cares #he's just bad at showing it #thomas Aubrey #the kidds are alright #i'm going to be insufferable #im so sorry but also #not?#i love relationship dynamics #solar trials fic

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capn-twitchery · 2 months

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hi this is @neathyingenue! your drawing of lt. grace and capt. twitchery was so dynamic and i would love to know more about their relationship if you'd like to share 👀

OHOHO rubs my hands together--you've activated my trap card >:3 (also thank you sm!! :D♥︎) SO-

short answer: their relationship is a complicated nightmare at best, and it changes a ton over time. they meet in weird circumstances, things stay weird for a long time, & they end up "together." what that means, i have no idea, bc i think they would die before they talked about it or said they were Actually Dating

long answer: they meet when twitch rescues a very nearly dead grace from the arctic. twitch thinks this poor guy looks very haunted, which is apparently interesting enough for them to reroute the entire ship so they have an extra couple months to hound him for secrets.

upon getting back to london, they want nothing more to do with eachother: twitch got all the secrets they could, grace wants to get far away from this weirdo, preferably as soon as possible, thanks

so they part ways, for a while. grace starts working with the constables (he thinks he can help people there. poor guy) they keep giving him the unwanted jobs: drag bodies back home, sort the paperwork, stand guard outside the cells because this new inmate is chatty and it's annoying everybody else and-oh, it's twitch. of course it is.

they get talking, since there's nothing else to do, and twitch is Very Persistent. they strike a deal: grace can use his connections to get twitch on the good side of the legal records, and in return, twitch will give him free zee trips when he needs it. twitch thinks this will be basically never, since grace has nothing going on, right? so they got the better end of this deal for sure-what do you mean he's on an unhinged revenge mission to murder a fucking master of the bazaar? oh, they have got to see this.

grace is too reluctant to zail himself, has no other contacts & doesn't know anything about the neath. twitch is his only real, consistent source, and they want to see & know everything about how it's going-- this is like the most interesting story in the world to them! so they're spending a lot of time together. a weird amount of time together, really, for two people who don't spend lots of time around any one person in particular.

and it's...kind of fun? sure, twitch is very unreliable, their weirdness is still offputting to grace, sometimes-- but less than it used to be. they're nicer than he gave them credit for, smarter, and their enthusiasm is infectious. and grace is very helpful, it turns out, and it's nice to have company in the captain's cabin, and making him smile instead of looking miserable all the time starts to feel kind of like an accomplishment, and- oh, no.

they both react to their feelings about as well as you would expect: ignore them! or in twitch's case, ask the ship's surgeon to surgically remove them (and get refused. cruel.) they both deny their feelings for a long time. it could never work anyway, right? they're far too different.

except, not really. grace later finishes nemesis, and after parting (somwhat bitterly) with twitch & a brief stint at the grand geode, he realises maybe the laws here fucking suck, actually--maybe he doesn't need to uphold them to help people. lucky for him, twitch has a hell of a rivalry with the admiralty & it's only a matter of time before they cross paths again. he deserts the admiralty in the midst of a naval battle, onto twitch's ship.

til i give either of them an ending, they stay together from that point--at least, as much as they want to. old habits die hard--twitch still likes zailing off to do weird shit, twitch is still a criminal, grace is very much not (more of a vigilante, i guess.) they still can't talk about what they are, they still clash sometimes. but they make it work! captain & (honorary) first mate.

(& twitch's crew breathe a sigh of relief. bc they've been waiting for their emotional brick wall of a captain to semi admit it for at least a year)

#THANK YOU SM FOR THE ASK i loved getting to ramble about this!!!#i'm sorry it was so long i tried to summaris as much as i could hehehe but i had more thoughts than i. thought (?)#i still have many more thoughts but this is very long already #hopefully it makes sense >:3 #londonmusings #inquiries #laconicmoon #twitchery #grace

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suzukiblu · 7 months

Note

disappointed missing fearless

Cut for weird alien biology kinky porn but mostly just for length. Also, I don't know if there's an actual established ship name for Slobo/Kon but this is technically from a YJ polyam fic either way, so idk if it actually matters right now, hah.

Pretty sure I posted at least some of this excerpt before, but this SHOULD be the extended edition.

"The Boy Wonder just had to be our token straight," Kon grumbles, folding his arms. Which is whatever, fine, preferences are preferences and the dude's still his friend and he would still very literally die either for him or on his say-so, but is the idea of letting Kon go down on him every now and then and maybe also making out a little somewhere in there really that unappealing? Like, seriously?

Bats are the freaking worst.

"What's it matter?" Slobo asks, wrinkling his nose at him.

"I mean, it doesn't matter-matter," Kon says with an exasperated sigh. "But also I just want to finally score some dick for once, man, and I still can't actually keep up with Bart's and Suzie only has one when she's in the right mood and Rob's isn't even into me, and I don't wanna go knock over a civilian for it, that's just–"

"And that'd be all the options for dick currently available to your picky ass, yeah," Slobo cuts in dryly, leaning in towards him with a pointed look. Kon turns red.

"Actually I kinda figured you were straight too," he says, glancing sidelong at the guy. "And very solidly monogamous, given all the time that you and Anita spend ignoring the rest of us in favor of rooms with doors that lock."

"We ain't monogamous, she just don't like gettin' interrupted when she's in the mood. Though yeah, you're right about the straight thing," Slobo agrees with a dismissive shrug. "But also, look, I'm Czarnian. Which literally none of you bastiches are. And gonna be frank here, you and Anita got a lot more biological similarities to each other than Anita and a Czarnian chick would, so at this point I don't really give a shit what kind of hole I'm fraggin' so long as whoever it belongs to's got somethin' interestin' to say about the process."

"Huh," Kon says, frowning to himself. "That literally never occurred to me as a thing that might be a thing, actually."

"I mean, what, are you attracted to Branx and Bolovax Vikians and Karnans and Martians?" Slobo snorts dubiously. "Or frell, even Czarnians?"

"Well, just the ones I like, but yeah," Kon says, a little puzzled by the question. They're all sentient species with free will and also he would absolutely let that one very specific Green Lantern just fucking step on him whenever the guy felt like it, so yeah, why wouldn't he be attracted to them? And . . . Kilowog, he's pretty sure said Green Lantern's name is? Kilowog's built like what a brick house wishes it could grow up and be. So Kon would definitely let him step on him. "Is that like . . . weird or something?"

"Galactically speakin', yeah," Slobo says wryly. "Though I guess you're already a hybrid so I probably shoulda expected you to be less discriminatin' than the rest of the universe tends to."

"So what, are you calling me a slut?" Kon snorts. "Like on a genetic level?"

"Depends how many people you've screwed, galactically speakin'," Slobo says.

"Not enough," Kon replies frankly.

"Then yeah, pretty sure you're a slut," Slobo says with another shrug. "Especially if you miss dick bad enough to get in a snit on the couch over it."

". . . I mean, okay, I haven't actually socialized with another dude's dick before," Kon admits grudgingly, making a face. "Unless watching gay porn counts, and to be honest I usually get bored if there's only one style of genitals onscreen so I don't do much of that. Just I just finally figured out that I fucking want dick and my options for getting it are frustratingly limited right now."

"Then wanna actually socialize with mine?" Slobo suggests, which is an approach that Kon appreciates the straightforwardness of. "Seein' as it don't belong to a picky control freak or a hyperactive speedster or someone with a real fraggin' inconvenient tendency to turn intangible when they come."

"Suzie does that?" Kon asks.

"Accordin' to Anita," Slobo replies with a shrug. "And since I trust her with my literal fraggin' life at this point, I'm assumin' this ain't the thing she's picked to lie to me over."

"Huh," Kon says. "Weird, but noted for future reference. And yeah, fuck it, let's socialize. Room with a lock, or . . . ?"

"Naw, give Wonder Girl the chance to walk in on us, she wants to see your indestructible ass get wrecked real bad," Slobo says with a smirk, then sticks with that straightforward approach that Kon so rightly appreciates and immediately yanks his belt open and whips his dick out right there on the couch. It is not remotely proportionate to his build, and Kon definitely means that as a compliment.

"Oh, is that the plan here?" Kon says, as someone whose mouth just went dry and who would also admittedly like to see his indestructible ass get wrecked for once. Like, that's a thing he'd like to get to do before he dies, that's all.

"Damn right it is," Slobo says, smirking wider at him and giving his cock a meaningful squeeze. Kon glances down at it speculatively, wondering exactly how Czarnians fuck. Said cock is currently actively rising to the occasion, and also getting increasingly disproportionate to Slobo's build.

Like. Very increasingly.

Damn.

"What'dya think? Wanna come on it, bastich?" Slobo asks with a leering grin and a very unsubtle tug. Kon flicks his eyes back to his face and just eyes him.

. . . then he eyes his dick.

It's actually, like, a very appealing dick. It might be a little smaller than Kon's own is, he thinks, but it's definitely comparable and still plenty damn big either way, all long and thick and heavy-looking, and it's got, like . . . ridges. Bumps. Textures. Like, Bad Dragon wishes it could design such a dick.

. . . Jesus, actually, is that a knot at the base? And–

Oh. Okay.

"Is your dick prehensile," Kon asks, officially just staring at it.

It waves at him.

"Is it?" Slobo asks with a smirk.

"Fuck," Kon says as a downright vicious stab of arousal goes through his gut, and then he very suddenly feels very weird. Slobo cocks his head, looking surprised.

Kon looks down at himself, because again, he feels weird. "Himself" is not there to be looked at.

Well, like, it is. Just not in very . . . "him"-type fashion.

"Huh," Kon says to the very nice pair of tits currently sitting all cute and perky under his S-shield. He blinks in absolute bemusement, and Slobo's expression lights up hungrily.

"Shit, you really do like me, huh," he says, letting go of himself and reaching out to put his hands around Kon's suddenly very, very narrow waist. Like . . . way too far around, actually. That's . . . an experience. Wow. "Never had Kryptonian pussy before."

Yeah, well, you're not the only one, Kon thinks only slightly hysterically.

"You can't get knocked up 'til you go through a full cycle, right, so can I stick it in raw?" Slobo asks like this is all just perfectly normal, which admittedly for all Kon knows about Slobo's life experience and alien biology in general it could in fact be. He thinks of several thousand reasons to say no, but given both who he is as a person and also how bad he really, really wants to finally score some dick for once . . .

"Yeah," he says, then half-reflexively flicks his eyes back down to Slobo's cock and licks his lips. Slobo grins.

"Nice," he says.

Anyway, Kon's suit lasts about five seconds after that. Which–it doesn't fit him quite right at the moment anyway, so it's whatever. It's very weird to see tits and ass and a statistically improbable amount of curves when he looks down at himself, but it's weirder feeling Slobo's hands and mouth roaming greedily all over said statistical improbabilities as the other pushes him down against the cushions. The prick hasn't even kissed him, which: rude much?

Not that Kon's really complaining, because if he wanted "polite" that bad he wouldn't be socializing with Slobo at all, much less his dick, and Slobo is currently making his way down his body and clearly on a mission to kiss him somewhere.

So yeah, the "weird" feelings are very rapidly losing out to the "holy shit, do that again" feelings.

"Holy shit, do that again," Kon says. Slobo grins sharply up at him and then Kon meets his clit and his clit meets Slobo's very eager tongue and anyway Kon now officially and intimately understands why people who've got one bitch so damn much when a partner ignores it. Like wow, does he ever. "Ohhhhh my god. Oh my god oh my god oh my god–!"

So that's pretty distracting, for at least a couple minutes there.

Not that Kon's brain is in any condition to be noticing the passage of time right now.

"Frag, you're already dripping. Wanna get off on my tongue a few times or just get straight to the main attraction?" Slobo asks as he hooks his hands around Kon's currently statistically improbable and also badly shaking thighs and licks his own very slick and shiny lips. Kon remembers the sight of the guy's big fat disproportionate dick very, very vividly, then immediately spreads his thighs as far as he can without the back of the couch interfering.

Possibly he damages said back of the couch just a little bit in the process.

Like, just barely.

"Main attraction," he says firmly. Slobo grins at him again.

"Damn, rolling out the red carpet here, ain't we," he says. "Gonna make a guy feel downright appreciated like this."

"Put your dick in me right the fuck now or I will put you through the fucking wall, asshole," Kon threatens, and of course it's Slobo, so he just grins all the wider.

"Fraggin' flirt," he says with obvious approval.

Then he puts his dick in him.

Kon's vision very literally whites out at the way Slobo feels sliding into him so big and hard and big and deep and big and good and he jerks up instinctively underneath him and makes some really, really undignified noises as his body seizes up. The couch might suffer a little more damage. Kon doesn't give the slightest bit of a fuck.

"Holy shit, did you just fraggin' come?" Slobo asks in obvious delight.

"Shut the fuck up," Kon barely gets out past the aftershocks making his whole damn body twitch and tremble under Slobo's, and Slobo laughs and sort of . . . rolls his hips, kind of, and Kon moans.

"Shit, you're tight," Slobo says, sounding approving again, and this time in a way that makes Kon shudder even harder than he already is. "And soaked. Feels like I just stuck it in somebody's sloppy seconds. What do you think, bastich, want the whole thing in your snatch? Think you can take it?"

"Yes," Kon chokes desperately, and Slobo does the only gentlemanly thing that Kon has ever seen him do, which is immediately just thrust into him balls deep.

That is definitely a knot, yeah, Kon notes.

And definitely Slobo's dick is prehensile.

The literal only reason that Kon doesn't fucking scream is because they're in a building full of active superheroes and god fucking forbid somebody come and "save" him right now. Like, Cassie can watch if she really is into that, but if anybody in any way tries to fucking interrupt he is gonna straight up just become a supervillain.

Unless it's a supervillain interrupting, he guesses, in which case he's just gonna take a page out of Wonder Woman's book and give them the Maxwell Lord special.

Either way, he emphasizes deeply with Anita and her locked doors.

Real deeply.

#kon el #slobo #superboy #not sfw #anonymous #rinfic #wip: gender? I hardly know her!!

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infoglitch · 7 months

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My very bad takes on rwby ships (the well known ones atleast. And yes most are jaune)

(i do not represent anyone except myself so do not judge others based on me because if you do. That's YOUR problem. Not the peoples you think I represent)

Hoi! I think its time I get crucified. Kidding obviously. This community isn't completely toxic, that much is obvious. Now let's get the obvious ones out the way

Bmblb.

Ok... time for the one I don't wanna touch because I don't have nice things to say.

Ok first. I don't mind this ship. Wanna get that out of the way because unlike most would assume. I don't hate or love this ship.

BUT. I got problems with how it was made fucking cannon. First off, fuck you rt and your "from the beeginning". I don't fuckin care how much you try to cover your incompetent asses. If the pants don't fuckin fit. Don't fuckin wear them!

Second. There was no real build up (you can argue there was. But it wasn't good. Anyone could have done a better job than rt). The only real thing that could "prove" this was planned was that yang "flirted" with Blake. Now you might be saying-

"oh but she explained her trauma to Blake that clearly means shes interested in her" in which. NO. Yes this moment is VERY good basis to build off these twos dynamic. And if rt kept building onto this by having yang slowly break down Blake's wall before eventually getting her to open up, I would be applauding rt for it, hell I would be a fan of it probably because for these two, it fuckin works! Blake clearly is alot more reserved and is rather prickly meanwhile yang is the rambunctious, ass-whooping, badass, and overall awesome ball of joy (sounds weird saying especially since yang is my favorite character). yet rt dropped the fuckin ball the moment sun showed up. Now I love sun and i enjoy black sun. But for the love of GOD if this shit is from the beginning than this clearly proves it was fucking not!

After volume three who did blake spend most of the time with in menagerie and rt was clearly trying to push? Not bmblb! BLACK-FUCKING-SUN. Let's give a round of applause to RT for making the dumbest decision of saying bmblb was planned from the start because bitch it was not.

And what did we get for yang. Oh only her trauma from one losing an arm and the fact she has PTSD from it. Oh yeah let's not forget the fact yang had ABANDONMENT ISSUES. Yet the moment her and Blake meet back up suddenly it doesn't fuckin matter because Weiss managed to somehow fix it by telling yang that Blake had suffered as well (i know that's not exactly what happened but point is I fuckin HATE the scene where Blake rejoins the team and yang is just "OK! I totally still don't have problems with the fact you left me and the team at both my and our teams lowest moment." Personally fuck you rt)

.....where was I again? Oh yeah rwby ships. So before I fuckin lose it at rt's incompetence at story telling, developing a romance and character building- let's move on to..... whiterose.... SON OF A BIT-

Whiterose

Look does the fact I don't care for BB and the fact I hate white rose with such a burning passion make me look like a misogynistic homophobic asshole a bad thing? Yes. But I just can't enjoy this damn ship because I just find it so FUCKING BORING!

I get it, it's "opposites attract". But I just don't care because this is so boring and basic that I can't even be glad a gay ship is actually popular instead of the same boring straight pairings.

I don't care if ruby could help Weiss be less of a bitch. Because that troop has been done to fucking DEATH.

There's not even the fact that it be a middle finger to Weisses dad because guess what he's already got his comupance and is also you know, FUCKIN DEAD. There's no satisfaction from any of this ship for me. Is it a bad ship? Fuck no we aren't even going to cover THAT!

But do I like this ship and hope it'll be cannon? No. And if it is? I won't care and I'm not even gonna celebrate it. You can take a fat piss on my grave before I say whiterose becoming cannon is the only option.

Now what ship is next- oh. Oh no. It's the ship everyone enjoys.

Arkos

Look I'm already gonna get fuckin crucified for my opinion of WR and BB. I don't feel like pissing off even MORE people!

... ok fine I'm saying my opinion.

I don't care for this ship. I don't care for pyrrha and I'm actively glad she is dead.

I won't even elaborate because this ship is dead and will gladly piss on its grave.

Rest in piss arkos. Overrated as fuck!

Next up is... rose garden. Finally a ship I dont mind supporting... but also... one thats gonna be hard to say

Rose garden

Look... their just fuckin cinnamon rolls and I love it!

"but you hated arkos yet both jaune and pyrrha were cinna-"

Uhp! No! None of your bullshit. But I will explain.

I don't care for arkos because I don't care for the fact pyrrha has no development. Not even a personality. She was always "the one girl that has feelings for jaune" which don't get me wrong, jaunes one of my favorite characters but I prefer the character he would be shipped with are actually characters and not... cardboard.

Now thankfully Oscar does not suffer the same fate. He's not infatuated with ruby, he is just a "kid" who just found a wizard stuck in his head and now he's off into a war he never knew about. He was timid (batshit terrified even) and yet when he sees the courage shown by the cast he slowly tries to be like them. with the moment between ruby and Oscar being a moment I fuckin love. Oscar is being honest and asking ruby why, why does she keep fighting? Keep marching into a unknown war that could very well kill her. And ruby simply answers by admitting she Is aware she might die, she even lost good people during the fall of beacon but she kept going because she wanted to be a huntress, she wanted to HELP people.

One of the many reasons I love rose garden is because these two fuckin dorks grow WITH each other instead of the simple "oh I'm the love interest of the main character I'm gonna be a cardboard cutout of the character I should be!".

I can't put it into proper words but I just love rose garden.

Whiteknight

Wait... are we actually talking about white knight and not another ship that I probably don't care about and get crucified because of them?

FUCK YEAH!

Gentlemen and ladies. I am proud to say I am whiteknight trash because damnit I love this ship.

I will say it now this ship is the shit that gives my Tumblr account LIFE. And like rose garden I can't even find words to describe how this ship makes me my brain go up with dopamine. This ship is just my favorite ship. Weiss and jaune have had so much buildup. Starting with jaune being a idiot and trying to flirt with a very much more cold Weiss (HA) To Weiss laughing at jaunes reaction to his voice after the high of depression that was V9! The little smile jaune had as he heard Weiss giggle. To the mother fuckin mature scene that has skyrocketed to memehood! I just love this ship because it is just everything I want out of a romance subplot!

Knightshade

Oh... oh we already at some.... unpopular ships.

Now this isn't exactly ship related as pyrrha was to arkos but I just don't like Blake, so you might be thinking "oh then you must hate knightshade". Well..

You.

Are.

WRONG!

I don't know why I like it I just like knightshade. It's cute, it's got enough crack to make it a crack ship, and the memes! The. Fuckin. MEMES.

God I love knightshade.

Knightfall

So... how do I say this?

I love this ship. Not joking I love this. I'd be peeved if this became cannon but as syndrome once said

"OH COME ON! YOU GOTTA ADMIT THIS IS COOL!" (Man was a salty man and died like a BITCH)

As to why?

The

Fuckin

ANGST!

I could write an entire fanfic of jaune and cinder fighting each other for days on end until jaune fucking loses but instead of killing him cinder just lets him live. To continue to fight as she gets some sick enjoyment from the attention.

That's all. (Also cinder please choke me with your thighs-)

[GLITCH HAS BEEN TEMPORARILY BANNED.]

Alright I'll behave. No thirsting, now onto.... Lancaster.... you know I can't tell if I want to be killed or be celebrated as a fuckin gift because this list is bizarre as fu-

Lancaster

.... where do I begin?

Ok I should probably state this now. I love this fuckin ship despite how... cliche it really is. I want these two dorks to be fuckin happy but I just can't say whole hearted this is my otp. It's just not for me, I'm sorry. But as you all know I have written.. some.. Lancaster fanfics (I am absolute jaune shipper trash, you can Bury me before I say any jaune ship is terrible except THAT! Even arkos ain't bad just overrated!)

But... yes I like this ship that why I'm writing fanfics in the first place I like alot of jaune ships (despite how much I hate THAT!) Because we'll most female characters that I pair with jaune have atleast some form of interaction. (Except silent knight. I just like that one because I like the "small murderous and tall gentle" dynamic. But we aren't covering silent knight.)

Now thats all I could say for Lancaster but there's one more sister that I wanna talk about but first.

For runner up on this list. Drum roll please.

🥁🥁🥁🥁🥁🥁🥁🥁🥁🥁🥁🥁🥁

Thank you-

.....

Huh I guess that drummer wasn't as dumb-

🥁🥁🥁🥁🥁🥁🥁🥁🥁🥁🥁🥁🥁🥁🥁🥁🥁🥁🥁🥁🥁🥁🥁🥁

Ok fuck you, your fired!

Now for runner up on this list (mainly because I like it but I don't have much to say-)

Martial arcs

(ha bet y'all rat bastards weren't expecting me to list a gay ship that I liked.)

Now all I have to say is.

🎶let them be fucking gaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay!~

OH YEAH!🎶

Now onto... my favorite one thats not white knight. The one, the only, the truest form of "what the fuck is glitch snorting"-

Dragon slayer

This is the one ship that has continued to be a ship I love dearly.

To me yang and jaune feel like they would be each other's wing(wo)man and would just be an ride to watch.

There wasn't even any evidence in why this ship could happen. But I still love it. Y'all can call it "just a write inserting themselves as jaune" but let me say this.

Dragon slayer is the Pinnacle of the most wholesome moments! Not even Lancaster can compare to the intimacy of this ship and yes! I AM TALKING OUT OF MY ASS BECAUSE I LOVE THIS STUPID SHIP AND AINT NO ONE TELLING ME I SHOULD BE ASHAMED!

....

Ok I think that's enough talking about Rwby ships for one Day because I've caused three things.

1) probably pissed off arkos, BB, and WR shipers.

2) weirded out quite literally everyone with my batshit insanity.

3) probably started a debate on what I mean when I say "THAT!"

Anyway have a great day/night/or what other time it is bitches, bros, and non-binary rat bastards

I'm off to get crucified because OH BOY did I probably poke the bear.

#rwby ships #rwby lancaster #rwby white knight #rwby arkos #rwby dragonslayer #rwby knightshade #rwby whiteknight #rwby whiterose #rwby bumbleby #rwby bmblb #rwby rosegarden #my opinions are terrible.#rwby knightfall #rwby #martial arcs

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a-court-of-moonlight-and-ire · 2 months

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Hello everyone, today I'll do something never before seen on the flames and darkness liveblog which is read TWO chapters!! Idk man, i havent been able to read more than one chapter at a time recently because this book suddenly turned into such a slog to get through, although granted that might also just be my mental illness making it more difficult. whatever, i'll be in treatment for that next week

Anyway, today I'll be reading chapter 44 which is the star fall chapter, and chapter 45 which is. a chapter. Knowing this book series nothing of note is gonna happen in that one but that wont stop me from reading it

Chapter 44

Okay, theyre mentioning Feyre not looking so emancipated amymore and it made me remember all the weird weight shit from the start of this book. Like, she was losing weight because she was throwing up all the time and then not eating a lot and everyone was constantly remarking on that and it was unbelievably uncomfortable, but then when Feyre officially joined the night court and everyone immediately stopped talking about it, it almost feels a little manipulative, if that makes sense. Like, this book is ostensibly about Feyres healing journey but the Night Court cannot, under any circumstances, have anything negative associated with it so her trauma basically just disappears so we dont have to see the unpleasant parts of her recovery, she has one (1) nightmare after she starts living there permanently, one (1) moment where she feels too depressed to leave the bed and a few moment where she acts out but then immediately feels bad for it every time

Ughhhhh Feyre is wearing a dress for this which is really frustrating but you guys already know how I feel about that so shant go into that much more detail on this

I swear Im not just saying this to be a hater, Feyres dress sounds so tacky too

yoooooooo is Cassian implying he'd like to wear a tacky ass dress too??

and yet hes just wearing a BLACK TUNIC bro Feyre is literally covered in diamonds from head to toe so she can look like a shooting star or whatever and Cassian doesnt even have the decency to wear a black tunic that glitters or something?? Or hell, maybe even a red tunic to match his siphons, idk, give me SOMETHING im gonna tear my fucking hair out

Feyre is wondering about the IC being her friends and its like, girlie theyre barely even each others friends and youve known each other for maybe half a year to their 500 years

Feyre is describing Azriel hungrily staring at Mor's ass and it reminded me of that one bonus chapter Ive seen discussions about where he's really horny about Elain in a way thats pretty uncomfortable, and a lot of ex-Elriels say that it made them stop liking the idea of the ship because thats when they realized that SJM was just gonna mutilate both of their characters for the sake of smut, but honestly I dont think she would even need to mutilate Az that much

I could not give less of a shit about the Mor/Cassian/Azriel drama but I have to admit its kinda funny reading about Feyre speculating so much about Mor's relationships knowing shes gonna turn out to be interested in women

Mor says that Rhysand was very upset after she had sex with Cassian and beat him up as hard as he could (#incest) but she says he wasnt upset because of her virginity but because of the danger she put herself in by losing it, which is like, first of all that seems like splitting hairs, he was still upset that she lost her virginity even though that was none of his business. And second of all, I think it would actually make sense for him to have the kind of archaic sexist beliefs that would make Mor losing her virginity upsetting to him, considering he was also 17 when that happened just like Mor and Im guessing there wasnt anyone around to teach him feminism. or maybe hes so feminist he came out of the womb believing in womens rights and didnt need to be taught anything

god, the inner circle dynamics are so comically fucked up I have no idea how they can stand being around each other

Again, Im not much of a Feylin girlie but "Your hair looks... clean." >>>>>>>>>>>>>> "You look like a women again." (???? whats thag even supposed to mean)

So Rhysand is not wearing a black tunic, but he is wearing wearing a black jacket which is equally disappointing. atleast he has his tits out i guess

Rhysand was gone for 50 years and yet his best friends are not spending any time with him at their first party together since theyve been seperated, thats what i call friendship goals

Yeah, I guess its kinda sad that Rhys missed out on important holiday that meant a lot to him while undr the mountain but you know who else had to do that? Literally everyone that wasnt from the spring court

So he doesnt wanna tell his friends, who are by all accounts doing alright because theyve spent the past few decades trapped in a beautiful idyllic city, about his trauma but hes perfectly fine traumadumping on a twenty year old woman who just started to recover from her own trauma

Maybe Im just in a bad mood but this bullshit where theyre getting covered in star spirits or whatever feels so joyless to me, like its not whimsical or fun to me

Okay so, Ive heard about Rhysand calling Feyre exquisite and it made me cringe just thinking about it, but it looks like theyve translated that to him calling her 'herrlich' which means the exact same thing but it sounds a lot less weird and bad. once again, thank you, Alexandra

Feyre really just said "You regret sexually assaulting me? But why?" huh

Chapter 45:

Okay, thats the end of the chapter but theres two more things that kinda annoyed me that I didnt feel the need to mention as I was reading. 1) Feyre kept going on and on aboht Rhysand being her friend, it felt so insincere, its like sjm say a post online right before she started writing this chapter that was like "in the best relationships, your partner isnt just your partner but also your best friend" and decided to put that sentiment in her book, and 2) I felt like there were so many moments towards the end of that chapter where Feyre is like "oh, ive never felt this way with anyone" and its very obviously alluding to how she didnt love Tamlin as much as she does Rhysand now, and it was just very strange to read, like Tamlin was haunting the narrative even though hes not even dead yet

Uhm. so i got really tired all of a sudden so I took a nap at this point and read some gay vampire fanfic to rejunivate myself and now Im ready for whatever happens in the next chapter

"I was a traitor. [...] Even though I oficially left Tamlin - it was only two months ago, after all. By Fae standards that was probably barely more than a day." Oh yeah, i havent been keeping track of the time thanks for reminding me that this story about immortals is moving at a breakneck pace for no goddamn reason. But also, as an author trying to write a grand long-lasting romance, why would you write this. I know Feysand are gonna get married at the end of book and now when I get to that point Im not gonna be thinking "wowwww such romance" Im gonna be thinking "damn these bozos did the fae equivalent of getting eloped in vegas after knowing each other for barely a week"

Oh, men of all ages are training at this camp? would you say some of them are. child-aged

Feyre is being all "its so cold here, im freezing in my illyrian leathers I cant imagine a child with no clothes surviving here for a single day, much less eight years" (referring to Cassian) and yet she doesnt spare a single thought to all the children who have to be at this camp as well because this is the camp that the batboys grew up in, its not like this is a different kind of camp where they dont train children

God I hate Feyre thinking about how fuckin powerful the batboys are especially because its like, Rhysand is literally their high lord, he already holds so much power over the guys running this camp we dont need a reminder that he could easily crush their minds or that his goons need more syphons to contain the totality of their power or whatever

I get that these guys are like, shitty misogynists or whatever, but I dont think Rhys throwing them out of the house they live in is some #boyboss move hes just being an asshole

Rhysand would never want to lock Feyre in a house for protection, but he does want to decapitate anyone who lays a hand on her which is soooooo much better

Rhysand keeps calling the.... "females" of this camp "girls" which implies one of two things: 1) hes talking about adult women, hes just calling them girls, which is not very feminist of our feminist king, or 2) hes talking about actual girls aka children which. thank god for our feminist king having equal-opportunity child soldiers

Its actually kind of surreal how theyre at the camp where the batboys spent their CHILDhoods and Feyre keeps talking about what it mustve been like for Cassian while the narrative is actively avoiding talking about children being at the camp at this present moment while also not outright stating "there are no kids here at this present moment"

"'[The clipping of the wings is] to ensure the safety of their women, they said.'" this reminds me of something @/kateprincessofbluewhales said in regards to Rhysand forcing illyrian women to train but not doing anything else to advance their rights, which is that the wing clipping mightve started as a way for men to help women dodge the 'draft' that seems to be mandatory for all healthy illyrians. I dont really have anything else to say about that, it just popped into my head and i thought it was interesting

Rhysand is talking about how at some of the camps, women are declared anti-marriage material if they train and how he cant do anything about that and its like, even if these women are not officially declared unmarriable or whatever, the misogynistic men that make up these camps are probably not gonna wanna marry a women who trains, so what difference does that really make

Also, he says the only thing he could do about 'laws' like that is to murder the warlords and take their children/trainees? under his wing and I guess he thinks he would have to do that for every camp that does that but honestly, I think just doing it once or twice would send a powerful enough message to discourage other warlords from being misogynistic. And he wouldnt have to raise all these children all by himself either, Im sure he could get the help of a few non-sexist men or even, gasp, some women. Like those priestesses living in that library Im sure some of the ones that have already recovered from their trauma somewhat wouldnt mind teaching some boys about the harm that misogyny does

Okay so the blood rite is called a Blutritual [blood ritual] in german which is a little confusing because a ritual is a pretty specific thing and I dont think the blood rite is that specific thing but whatever, it sounds cool enough

Ive said this before, I am not a Tamlin girlie, at best I prefer him to Rhysand, and I dont like or trust Rhysand at all, but imagine hearing that tragic story about how their families killed each other, leaving them as the only survivors and being like "I cant believe Tamlin killed Rhysands family!!" especially when its like, the only person Feyre actually knows Tamlin killed is Rhysands dad who sucked ass, its not exactly a great loss

I feel like i had a lot of thoughts about a lot of things in this chapter that I couldnt write down because theyre these abstract half-thoughts, so I think I'll let those marinate until theyre full thoughts and share them with you at some later date

#anti acotar #anti rhysand #anti feysand #anti acomaf #flames and darkness liveblog

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mcytblr-archive · 2 months

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Early MCYTblr Interviews: Anonymous

our interviewee today is the anonymous author of the "SBI Crit Post". he's asked to both remain anonymous and not to be sought out; he's been incredibly helpful and polite through this entire interview process, and i would ask you all to leave any residual feelings you may have from that time at the door. If you think you remember who posted it, please keep it to yourself. that said, let's begin!

Q: Before we begin talking about the ‘Crit Post’, I’d love to hear what your experience of MCYTblr was like before it was posted. Do you have any standout memories from this time?

A: Not particularly. There's some things that I guess looking back on nowadays is kind of wild, like how in the groups I was running in, shipping of any kind that wasn't DNF was super frowned upon (as in, I trigger tagged for IRL shipping)…but truthing wasn't really? Or, how back then the lines between 'critblr' and main mcytblr were super fuzzy. I hung out with both groups before the Crit Post to no issue. Oh!!! And this is a wonderful piece of MCYTblr lore that you may not know, but when I posted the Crit Post, I was apart of a MCYT art exchange themed after MCC called MC Creatives. I think it only happened once, and I can't exactly remember who ran it. They were a really nice DNF (? or just DTeam) blogger. I think it's cool to see that even back then the community was pretty tight knit and had overarching community activities like we see today. It's interesting to me that our fandom has missed out on some of the more important parts to being a fandom… not many big bangs, only one or two that I know of. It's very sad, but we are a weird fandom in general, and definitely a Modern Fandom, if you understand what I mean by that LOL. There is one memory that does stick out, completely irrelevant to this interview though. The fake Dreambur meetup. I pulled an all nighter for it. I was shaking. I drew fanart (though never posted it). Everyone was hysterical. And then it was faked and everyone went WHAT.

Q: As you let me know in your dms, you were the user who made the original “SBI Crit Post”. Would you mind giving a quick rundown of what it was exactly, for anyone who may not know?

A: I would, but frankly I barely remember anything about it. It was like… I saw someone being like "weird that we aren't as critical of SBI as we are of DT" and I thought, "Well, I can probably try?" and made shit up. It was nonsense. I can't even remember what I said about Philza. The points against the others were "Tommy is too young to be in this business" "Wilbur queerbaits" and… "Technoblade needs to be less honest about his ADHD he's glorifying it" or something like that. Again, it was nonsense at its best.

Q: What was your reasoning at the time for making the post? Did the overall culture around you play a part in it?

A: Here's the part no one knows: At the time of posting, I was 13 by maybe… one, two, or three weeks. And I'd spent almost the entirety of my time as a 12 year old in a community that was like "we need to be Critical of our Favorite Creators because this is Righteous and the Only Good Way To Engage With MCYT" and I was like "Everyone here is older than me and therefore endlessly smarter than me," and therefore just accepted it. You can see it very clearly in the part that was "critical" of Wilbur Soot. He was queerbaiting for what? Acting like he wanted to kiss men? Dressing nice? Ridiculous! But if we called Dream a queerbaiter (and never GNF, because everyone was convinced he was gay), then I thought surely Wilbur Soot could also be a queerbaiter! This made total sense to baby 13 year old me. It's not fair to really call that indoctrination: it's not like I was falling down an alt-right pipeline or anything. I was just a stupid kid with too much internet access who liked minecraft and knew nothing about like Dan & Phil or Septiplier (kind of thing that would make me suspicious of this activity--especially truthing). I thought I was fufilling some honor by saying "and yes, my favorite minecraft boys aren't without fault either!" The people that stayed friends with me after that… some of them were my closest normal non-Critblr friends, who refused to abandon me (shout out to you guys you know who you are), and the rest were the people in Critblr who were… okay with my behavior.

Q: I understand that the backlash to the post was very intense– what was it like from your perspective? Did it have any affect on you?

A: Lots. Lots and lots and lots. I lost a bunch of my close friends who weren't okay with what I'd said or how I'd doubled down, and it really messed with me as a kid in the middle of quarantine. There were times where I genuinely considered hurting myself irreperably as either a way to "apologize for what I had done" or just a way to stop worrying that everyone I knew was going to block me one day. Those feelings lasted for a long time, I still struggle with them to this day, over three years later (? I think). And I was kind of lead to believe that was an okay response. I recieved asks the night that it all went down where I was told I should hurt myself. Of course my own behavior wasn't cool, but neither was that. I know there was a post out there by a popular (at the time?) Technoblade blogger that detailed the faults in that post, but I never read it. All I knew about it was that people saw it, and harassed me because they saw it, and that the OP of that post hated me. It got to the point that seeing that blogger's URL caused me to have panic attacks, a ridiculous thing because that blogger as far as I know never actually did anything wrong. I don't know. Every once in awhile, someone in the server I'm in (hi some of you are definitely reading this :3 i love you guys) will bring up the post in passing and I'll have to mute the channel for 24 hours because I'm scared. Or even when we're discussing normal drama, if something feels too close to the Crit Post, or like it might come up, I'll get shaky and nauseous and have to mute the channel for 24 hours. It's weird, the shit being told to kill yourself because you did something dumb as a 13 year old can do to you.

Q: As a follow-up: What, if anything, do you wish had happened instead?

A: I don't know really. I guess the obvious answer is "I didn't make the post" or "I didn't double down", but I think the real answer has to be that I wish the community I was in hadn't taught me that what I was doing was an okay move.

Q: Do you have anything else to add about the Crit Post, MCYTblr, or the community as a whole?

A: Not really. I "retired" from MCYTBlr in I think 2022, but kept a passing interest in it for a long time, and I'm still active in a discord (hi again) comprised entirely of fans and retired fans. I loved MCYT, and in some ways, I still do. When I'm sad, I put on old Technoblade videos. When I'm really sad, I put on old Purpled videos. These things are my comforts, things that I haven't ever been able to give up. And that's good! Even if I don't talk about MCYT anymore, I'm glad it's there for me.

#Early MCYTblr Interviews #Volume 4 #Anonymous #SBI Crit Post

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