#its just that what he really needs is like. therapy. and to let his friends fucking help. hooolyyy shit.
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I hate it here (a lot less when I’m with you) | OP81 x Reader
Summary - Reader just got out of a mildly toxic relationship and released a song about what her coping mechanism was during that time, but when her new relationship gets leaked by the paparazzi, she decides to show off her new favourite person.
Warnings | Mentions of a past toxic relationship/ breakup, swearing
FaceClaim | Gracie Abrams
Requested | Yes - No
Type | SMAU
Yourusername
Liked by | AaronDessner, PheobeBridgers and 2,987,425 others
Tagged | @/AaronDessner
Yourusername | Long Pond Studios has always been a place where I’ve let my emotions and feelings guide my songwriting completely, every song that I’ve written and recorded in this place has been a complete raw reflection of my feelings, and I’m forever grateful that I can trust you enough to share them all with you without the slightest moment of hesitation. That’s why, I’m surprise releasing my brand new song, ‘I hate it here’ now. This song is about a method I’ve used to cope for the past few years of my life when I wasn’t in the best situation, and I hope that it will help any of you who are or were in the same situation I was. This song was made with my soulmate of a collaborator, chosen friend, found family of mine, Aaron and were so incredibly proud of it and we can’t wait for you to hear it. Sorry for being away for so long, I love you 🤍
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User1 - OMFG SHES ALIVE !!!
User2 - ONLY TOOK FIVE MONTHS TO CONFIRM YOU’RE ALIVE AND BREATHING
AaronDessner - My favourite one together so far 🤍
Yourusername - Love you forever 🤍
User3 - WTFDYM ‘I HATE IT HERE’ EXPLAIN?
User4 - GO LISTEN TO IT ITS SOOOOOOOOOO GOOD
User5 - A SURPRISE DROP? WE’RE SPOILED
User6 - When Aarons a co-writer AND the producer, you know for a fact the song will change your life (and make the therapy bill triple)
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User7 - Girl don’t apologise
User8 - FR like she gets cheated on, takes a brake and then apologises to us 😭 like girl it’s okay
JackAntanoff - *Alexa play Traitor by Olivia Rodrigo*
Yourusername- Your times coming synth man 🤫 LOVE YOU STILL
User9 - WDYM HIS TIME IS COMING YOU CRYPTIC WOMAN
User10 - “I hate it here so I will go to secret gardens in my mind.” That’s all I have to say.
User11 - Y/n could write Romeo and Juliet but Shakespeare couldn’t write I hate it here
User11 - “I place you need a key to get to, the only one is mine” girly I hope someone makes you want to make a copy one day
Yourusername - God I love you lmao
User11 - OMFG Y/n loves me I can die happy
User12 - “tell me something awful, like you are a poet.” BC HE ALWAYS PAINTED HER BLUE SKYS THE DARKEST GREY, RUINING HER DAY BY TELLING HER AWFUL SHIT LIKE HES A TORTURED POET !!!!!! (I knew Coney Island wasn’t fictional you fucking delusional people, no one in a happy relationship writes that shit 💕💕💕)
User13 - “This man made me feel worthless.” Y/EX/N ISTG WHEN I FIND YOU. COUNT UR MINUTES
User14 - “I'm lonely but I'm good, I'm bitter but I swear I'm fine” bitch where did you find my diary
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Yourusername
Liked by, SabrinaCarpenter, OscarPiastri and 2,191,910 others
Tagged | @/SabrinaCarpenter
Yourusername - I’m sorry who’s this woman debuting at no.1 on the billboard hot one hundred? My god it is me, I can’t believe this, I love you I love you I love you thank you so so much from the bottom of my heart, I mean it, I really do. MY GOD I LOVE EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOU. (And my baby with her first top ten entry, I love you Sabby, Go stream espresso, it is that sweet 🤍💕) OKAY ONE LAST THANK YOU. 💕🤍💕🤍💕
Okay I lied but being among names like Beyoncé, Ariana Grande, SZA and Kendrick Lamar is one of the biggest honours ever, I’m huge fans of them all and to be in the same space as them is an honour no words can express, I love you all, the most caring sweet fans on the whole planet 💕💕💕💕
(And yes, it was a reference to a physical key, this is it)
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User14 - We made the right one famous guys
User15 - I’m actually crying, when did she stop being our little secret
SabrinaCarpenter - My biggest fan 🩷
Yourusername - Your biggest fan 🩷
User16 - Oscar in the likes for what?
User17 - Who?
User18 - Oscar Piastri, he’s a 23 yr old f1 driver
User19 - What is vroom vroom boy doing here
AaronDessner - Truly blessed to work with you
Yourusername - I’m the blessed one don’t even
User20 - Only y/n could send a five minute long, slow, alt pop song with a main piano background, basically a depressing lullaby bop, to number one above all these TikTok songs
User21 - She’s actually adorable
OscarPiastri - Been on repeat!
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User22 - UM HELLO WHAT ARE U DOING HERE LITTLE ORANGE MAN?
User23 - This is all bc of me btw
Celebrity.updates
Liked by, user24, and 82,828 others
Tagged | @/Yourusername @/OscarPiastri
Celebrity.updates - NEW COUPLE!!! Fast upcoming pop star, Y/n Y/l/n (21) seen out late at night on the streets of London with Formula one driver, Oscar Piastri (23), according to the source of these pictures the two were laughing and running around the streets together, when Oscar caught up to her and hugged her to him and kissed her. Rumours say that Y/n met Piastri through her ex partner who’s an engineer for f1 team Alpine, the pair seem to be quite smitten and loving with each other. What’s your thoughts on this?
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User25 - WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU MEAN
User26 - Posting these photos is bad enough, but tagging them in it is crazy
User28 - Neither of them have even been hinting at a relationship at all, they clearly didn’t want anyone to know yet
User29 - Can’t these sickos just let them live, they’re people too
User30 - Whoever took these is messed up
User31 - They do look rlly happy together though
User32 - The fact that her ex is an alpine engineer makes this situation so much more funny and interesting
SabrinaCarpenter - You’re actually disgusting
User33 - TELL THEM SAB
User34 - The fact that she’s not even wrong
User35 - the fact that she defends Y/n with no hesitation
User36 - The friendship we all need in our lives
Yourusername
Liked by, OscarPiastri, SabrinaCarpenter and 2,928,198 others
Tagged | @/OscarPiastri
Yourusername - I hate it here a lot less when I’m with you 🤍 my favourite polite cat xxxx
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LandoNorris- Finally. The pair of you at the paddock hiding in MY divers room bc you were scared someone would see you in Oscar’s. Sigh.
Yourusername - You love me
User37 - OH MY GOD
User38 - I need to know the bears name
OscarPiastri- She named him Gerald
Yourusername - Don’t sound so disgusted, that’s our son
OscarPiastri - Sorry baby
User39 - Hysterical
OscarPiastri - My favourite smiling dog 🤍
Yourusername- Excuse me did you just call me a bitch
OscarPiastri- NO I DIDNT MEAN IT LIKE THAT
User40 - The dynamic is already everything to me
User41 - Even his GF knows he’s a polite cat
Yourusername - He so is (he’s in denial)
User42 -“ I hate it here a lot less with you” Shut the fuck up
OscarPiastri
Liked by, Yourusername, LoganSargeant and 1,872,001 others
Tagged | @/Yourusername
OscarPiastri - She made me a copy 🗝️🤍
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User43 - Someone sedate me
User44 - SHE. MADE. HIM. A. COPY.
User45 - WTFFFTTFTFTD
User46 - Literally the ultimate Oscar on Alpine revenge
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Yourusername - I don’t need my secret gardens, or my lunar valleys anymore, because I have you 🤍
OscarPiastri- My favourite and only girl 🤍
User47 - I’m taking a nap on the highway
///////
#oscar piastri x reader#oscar piastri x you#op81 x reader#op81 imagine#op81 fluff#op81 fic#op81 x you#op81 angst#op81 smau#formula one x reader#f1 x reader#f1 one shot#f1 imagine#charles leclerc x reader#f1 x female reader#f1 x y/n#f1 x oc#f1 x you#f1 x female driver#f1 smau#f1 fanfic#formula one x you#formula one x y/n#lando norris x you#lando norris x oc#lando norris x y/n#lando norris x reader#ln4 one shot#ln4 x y/n#ln4 fluff
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#tw self harm#i told my professor about my cutting and it was nice to talk to someone who could respond in an actually helpful way#i call him my professor because that is technically what he is but hes become a sort of real friend recently#which is good bc i dont have any nowadays really#a bit sad for him tho#anyway it was nice to actually get to talk to someone about it who was capable of being an adult about it is the best way to describe it?#like i told my then partner about it and they kinda just didnt say anything? like didnt even acknowledge that it was something i said#i told my best friend about it and hes sweet but he mostly just got upset and asked me to stop#its a resonable thing to get emotional about but that wasnt the response i needed#but my professor just asked me if i wanted to talk to him about it while he walked his dog#i said yeah because i wanted to meet his dog and we went on a walk and it was nice#he said he didnt find it that weird since he had a girlfriend who did it in college#he let me explain and didnt try to change my mind and just asked me what i thought about everything#and when i couldnt answer he just pointed out some ducks and we talked instead about the kinds of turtles living in the canal#ive been in therapy for a long time but that was probably the nicest conversation i ever had about my self harm#im really emotional and lonely typing this out but i wanted to at least document a little of what im feeling right now
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You know what idea has always ENCHANTED ME?
Ever since I saw it on a sci-fi show?
The Deadly Magical House That Loves You™. See, it's a house that has become something MORE. Gained sentience. And? Instead of acting out some cheap horror movie jump scares? It digs deep to its foundations, thinks long n hard, and decides on what it WANTS.
And it WANTS?
To be a HOME™.
To TAKE CARE OF somebody. Have LIFE in its halls. Meals at its tables. Joy and laughter bouncing across its walls. So? It lays a trap. Lures people in.
Come live in me~
I am a good home.
I am Free! I am "Safe". I will give you whatever your heart desires.
I care not for morality or laws. Boundaries or taboos. Do you desire? Come, come, be HAPPY~! Live in me! Relax here! Forget about the world beyond these walls. Anything I can not give you, I can bring TOO you! This is a Happy Home.
But, of course, such sentience and pushiness terrifies. People run and flee in horror. The house getting more aggressive. Trying to hold tighter. After all! If they would just STAY for a while, they would SEE! It's so LOVELY here! The would LOVE to live inside them!
But... instead?
They are hurt.
Doors smashed open. Windows broken to escape. Furniture thrown. Their avatar, Jeeves, bashed with heavy things. Why... WHY?! They are only trying to HELP! To LOVE them! Be a good HOME! They grow more and more run down. Starved. Wrathful.
It is, of course, their Obsession. To be a home. They are so very hungry.
When? Who should come along?
But the depressed AF Ghost King! He's been... not TECHNICALLY kicked out. But "things are tense" kicked out. He's tired. His college courses are remote. He can't really AFFORD rent. And everything is just...
He's TIRED.
He wants to cry.
Why... why can't he have ONE good thing? ONE sign everything's gonna be alright?
"Free House!"
Well... I mean... that IS a literal sign. Huh. He flies down. The house notices him. Tries to look as enticing as it can. And? Gasp! I... It's WORKING? This one seems INTERESTED? Quick! Flowerbeds! Look at my flowerbeds! Ooooh, lovely floooowers! A.. and there's probably really nice wood flooring! C'mon. C'moooon!
Danny? Sees a free Lair. Not too far from both Gotham AND Metropolis. Good location. Needs a little fixing up. But I mean... you can't beat free, right?
Is he really gonna do this?
......fuck it. Yeah, let's do this. First house time. He's just glad he carries a sharpie on him most of the time. Scribbles "Sold!" Over the sign then calls Jazz. He's... kinda not sure WHAT he's supposed to pack?
Finds out, post move in, whoop. Sentient Lair. Clingy, clingy, highly desperate sentient Lair. Oof. Guess fixing up the place can be therapy for both of us. Jazz helps.
The house heals. He falls into a routine. Schoolwork, hang out in the garden or the observatory, meals FaceTiming friends or watching videos, naps whenever he wants them. It's... it's so peaceful. Quiet and soothing to his agitated and worn down soul. Like a balm.
House gets him whatever he needs. They're kinda awesome like that. Always seems to have room to fit this or that. He doesn't question it. His brain figuring it works on Zone logic.
He probably SHOULD have.
Because? Things have been going missing. At a slow, steady, pace. Food, technology, entertainment. A building that shouldn't BE there, has been spotted in a wealthy county just outside of Superman and Batman's two cities.
No one can get near it.
It's been getting BIGGER.
Growing, like a tumor, room by room. Floor by floor. The gardens creeping like kudzu, to swallow everything in their path. Yet delivery drivers drop things off. Things they don't remember. On trips they don't recall. People are scared.
Amateur detectives have managed to discover some sort of starlit fae that lives there, along with a human boy.
Justice League Dark has been called in. Are currently standing just outside the slowly creeping property line. A garden statue just hissed at them. The trees are trying to throw acorns. A hushed argument has already broken out. How do they contain the house?
@the-witchhunter @nerdpoe @hypewinter @hdgnj @babbling-babull @mutable-manifestation @spidori @lolottes
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Favorite Buddie fics of 2023!
Every single year at @epicstuckyficrecs I used to do a fic rec at the end of the year with my favorite fics. I figured I should keep the tradition going! So, without further ado, these are my favorite Buddie fics (in no particular order) published in 2023! (you can also check out some other favorite Buddie fics of mine here)
If you have any favorites that aren't in this list, don't hesitate to share them in the comments! :)
Complete
find a way to you (if it kills me) by foxwatson/ @eddiediazes (Post S6E13: Mixed Feelings, Pining | 19K | Mature): the one where eddie decides to start dating again, buck figures out his own feelings just a minute too late, and then he spends a week going through the five stages of grief
let the world have its way with you by fleetinghearts/ @shitouttabuck (Post-Coma AU | 54K | Explicit): or, a bucket list that’s really about buck needing to make a change and an eddie who’s ready to do anything to see him fall in love with life again. it takes some crossing off for eddie to realise—the thing at the top of the list in his own heart? it’s been right here all along
Being Eddie by Daisies_and_Briars/ @cal-daisies-and-briars (Time Travel, Post-Season 6, Getting together | 80K | Teen): When Eddie starts seeing a new therapist, he’s presented with the opportunity to revisit several days from his past and right regrets that still bother him. OR: Eddie goes through the time travel therapy process of the 2009 Canadian TV show Being Erica.
Evan Buckley & The Coma-Verse of Madness by Daisies_and_Briars/ @cal-daisies-and-briars (Coma AU, Multiverse | 58K | Teen): After being struck by lightning on a call, Buck experiences a plethora of alternate realities showing him different directions his life could have taken. Fighting hard to get home, Buck learns what, or who, is important to him in every lifetime.
like a dog with a bird at your door by fleetinghearts/ @shitouttabuck (Post-S6, Getting Together | 51K | Explicit): or, evan “i love you like a dog” buckley has only ever known how to love like, well, a dog, but maybe eddie diaz is the kinda guy to give a flea-bitten mongrel a forever home
Both Blade and Branch by Daisies_and_Briars/ @cal-daisies-and-briars (Post-S6 | 62K | Mature): The chances of being struck by lightning twice are incredibly minute, but Buck still manages to pull it off. During a double date with Marisol and Natalia, nonetheless. Eddie manages to resuscitate him, but as Buck recovers from yet another trauma, Eddie can’t help but notice there’s something very different about him. He’s not quite sure what version of Buck he got back.
where all of the people dancing and clapping would greet me with such warmth by trysetmeonfire/ @try-set-me-on-fire (Season 6, Magical Realism | 15K | Mature): In the fall, Buck begins to disappear. (Part 2 of All I Am, All That I Am)
Nothing Left But You by Daisies_and_Briars/ @cal-daisies-and-briars ("Blip" AU | 27K | Teen | Warning: MCD): In May of 2021, 25% of Earth's population suddenly disappears. Including Eddie. In May of 2026, they all come back. Eddie finds himself suddenly in the middle of a world he doesn't recognize, where the people he loves most have changed significantly.
Your Love is an Oil Slick (It Glows like Rainbows, It Stains My Soul) by letmetellyouaboutmyfeels/ @letmetellyouaboutmyfeels (Canon Divergent - Supernatural Elements, Ghost Buck | 67K | Explicit): When Eddie's son claims he has an imaginary friend, Eddie doesn't think much of it. Christopher is seven, it's what kids do. But then weird things start happening around the house, and Eddie starts dreaming about a handsome blue-eyed man. Turns out, Christopher's friend isn't so imaginary. Their house is haunted.
come with me, together, we can take the long way home series by allisonRW96/ @homerforsure (Canon compliant | 105K | T to M):
Get me through the night; Make me feel alright (Post-S3 Finale | 11K | Mature): After an emotionally-gutting reunion with Abby, Buck turns to old coping mechanisms. Eddie helps him find a better way.
In Uncertain Times, The Uncertain Rules Apply (Pre-S4 | 22K | Teen): Covid comes to LA. Eddie copes. Or doesn't.
Holding out for Something More (Stuck in Reverse) (Post S4E3/Lone Star Crossover | 26K | Teen): LA is coming out of lockdown and the world is returning to some sense of normalcy. But going back to the way things were hurts more than Buck expected. While his therapist challenges him to confront what he really wants, the team takes a trip to Austin... and El Paso.
so far from being free (S4E4: 9-1-1 What's Your Grievance?, S4E5: Buck Begins | 46K | Teen): That’s Daniel. He was our brother. Buck doesn’t know what to do with the past tense. He never had a brother. He’s always had a brother. He gained one and lost one in the same breath and it feels impossible.
Kink Club AU series by Princessfbi/ @princessfbi (Canon Divergent - Different First Meeting, BDSM, Dom Eddie, Sub Buck | Complete | Explicit): Canon compliant one shots where Eddie works at a Kink Club as a side hustle and meets Buck there before his first shift in 2x01.
The Warmth (of You) (25K): aka where Buck and Eddie first meet at a kink club before the firehouse
To Weather the Storm (With You) (21K): aka the fallout of Buck finding out the dom he met at a Kink Club is his new coworker
Safe Here (With You) (20K): aka Buck and Eddie handle working a shift after their first scene
The Building Pressure (of You) (15K): aka Buck reaches out to Eddie after he leaves Abby's place in 2x07
An Offer to Torment (You) (14K): aka Eddie is all twisted up inside about what to do with Shannon. Buck offers himself up for some much needed holiday stress relief.
like when the sun came out by spaceprincessem/ @spaceprincessem (Canon Divergent, Ghosts | 39K | Mature): Evan gave up trying to explain what happens to him after his parents forced him to have a talk with one of their friends, supposedly a pediatric therapist, and cruelly hinted that if Evan didn’t stop seeing and talking about his “invisible friends” as if they were real then his parents would send him far away to places where they lock children up in padded rooms. “Look,” Evan says quickly, forcing out the words before he gets too scared to speak,” I—I know this is going to sound crazy, but, um, ever since I was a kid I can see ghosts.”
tomorrow will always and forever now be today (tomorrow is our always and forever) by withmeornotatall/ @chronicowboy (Post-S6, Time Loop | 43K | Mature): eddie gets trapped in a time loop on the day buck marries natalia
All My Shattered Oaths by letmetellyouaboutmyfeels/ @letmetellyouaboutmyfeels (Vampires AU | 107K | Explicit): Eddie wants to stay away from his family’s legacy and give his son a normal life. Buck’s desperate to find a way to get over the love he lost. Fate has other plans for both of them.
Don't They Know It's the End of the World? by Daisies_and_Briars/ @cal-daisies-and-briars (Fallout 4 AU, Post-Apocalyptic | 32K | Mature | Warning: Violence): After being put in a cryogenic sleep for over a hundred years to wait out an apocalyptic event, Eddie Diaz wakes up, too early, to find his son has been stolen from his cryo-chamber. Scared and alone in a frightening world he doesn't recognize, Eddie is willing to do anything to get his kid back.
but i can see all along, love (it was you all the way down) by diazchristopher/ @captain-hen (Post-S6, Time Loop | 28K Mature): He puts his laptop away after a bit, and paces the length of his apartment as he tries to take stock of the situation at hand. One: The date is March 22nd, 2024. Two: It has been March 22nd for 3 days now. Three: Buck is trapped in some kind of time loop that is forcing him to relive this day. Four: Eddie is, apparently, in love with him. And. And. Five: Buck doesn’t feel the same way.
WIP
And here are my favorite WIP that I really hope will continue to be updated in 2024! 🤞
for all the haunts and homes of men by euadnes/ @kananjarus (Canon Divergent, Post-Apocalyptic, Station Eleven Crossover | WIP | 11/? | 96K | Mature | Warning: Violence): The year by the old calendar is 2025. Home is gone. Home is a failed rescue mission and an echo of a memory. Home is a lost boy living in a wooden house by the sea. But first, there was a promise. Christopher, when it's safe, I'll take you back to your father. Buck had all but given up on keeping it after the world had died and everyone in it. But just as some oaths refuse to be forgotten, so the same can be said about the endurance of love.
Things We're All Too Young to Know by Daisies_and_Briars/ @cal-daisies-and-briars (Canon, S1 through S6 | 104/? | 283K | Mature): This is a love story. Even if it doesn’t always look like it. Even if it doesn’t always feel like it. A look back on Eddie and Buck's lives up to now, and what led them to each other, interpreted from the current 9-1-1 canon.
Precious & Fragile Things by Daisies_and_Briars/ @cal-daisies-and-briars (Small Miracles AU, Angel Buck | 10/? | 25K | Teen): Buck is the Fallen Angel of Petty Temptation, who has been tasked with tempting human Eddie Diaz to sin and enjoy life, but just a little. He thinks the job will be easy - get in, get out, go back to Peru to continue messing around with eternity. But when Buck arrives in Los Angeles, he finds Eddie is harder to tempt than expected, and more compelling than Buck had hoped.
Right Where You Left Me by hyacinthusbloom/ @thebloomingheather (Canon Divergent, Post-S4, Angst | 89K | 20/? | Explicit | Warning: Rape/Non-con): "Therapy?" Eddie suggests. Buck almost laughs, but instead says, "I'll go if you go." Because he had fully expected him to be chicken shit, to disagree, and instead Eddie, the bastard, replies, "Deal." Or Buck never tells anyone that he slept with his therapist and deals with the butterfly effect years later.
Innocence died screaming, honey, ask me I should know by JJK/ @trenchcoatsandtimetravel (Demon Buck, Canon Divergent | 7/? | 12K | Teen): Buck is a demon with the power to help with pregnancy, childbirth, and infant health. When the Buckleys make a deal asking for someone to help 'save their baby', Buck leaps at the chance as it will give him what he's always wanted: a life on earth. But demon deals are tricky and neither of them gets quite what they're after. This is Buck's journey as he navigates growing up on earth and remembering how to help those in need.
#epic buddie fic rec#buddie#buddie fic rec#buddie fic#buddie fanfic#buddie fanfiction#911 fanfic#911 fic#911 fanfiction
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Good Omens fic recs
Hello all! Wanted to share a few of my longtime faves. These are all pre-s2, might do another with my post-s2 recs? Narrowed it down to 10, since that's the max links tumbl lets you have in a post.
Any Way You Want It
Author: Justkeeptrekkin
Words: 27,500
Chapters: 5/5
Rating: Mature
Mood: Vacation, soft but introspective
After finally getting heaven and hell off their backs (at a cost) Crowley and Aziraphale go on holiday to a cottage in Scotland.
Fluffy with fun snappy dialogue, the two really feel like best friends here! Aziraphale struggles with his tendency to go slower than even he wants.
Instructions Not Included
Author: Atalan
Words: 68,000
Chapters: 13/13
Rating: Teen
Mood: Detective / Gen (There are feelings but it earns that slowburn tag)
My "if season 2 isn't good, this is my season 2" fic. Now, I liked season 2, but this is still SO good. After the notpocalypse, Aziraphale and Crowley start a detective agency investigating supernatural happenings together. New characters include Raphael (who totally missed the apocalypse haha whoops), and a big spooky dog (whomst I adore).
Note that while this fic stands just fine on its own, there is an unfinished sequel that imo doesn't leave off anywhere stressful.
When in Rome
Author: Kedreeva
Words: 4,000
Rating: General
Mood: The liminal space of nighttime conversations
What happens after Aziraphale invites Crowley to oysters: Wings and reading. Tentative and innocent in those early days.
the deft, sweet gesture of your hand
Author: deadgreeks
Words: 12,000
Rating: Explicit
Mood: Hurt/Comfort, introspection
A few years after the failed apocalypse Crowley shows up badly injured at the bookshop. Aziraphale has to help heal Crowley and save them both, and still finds the time to knit his feelings.
Chemistry
Author: Twilightcitysky
Words: 122,000
Chapters: 19/19
Rating: Explicit
Mood: Y'ever want a side of learning something with your romcom?
After realizing they might need their own corporations to heal themselves now that they're not working for heaven and hell, Aziraphale and Crowley turn on all their bodily functions. All of them. What could be a silly premise is played out very satisfyingly, the actual biology of hormones at play here is fascinating.
(this is not really at all related but: has anyone else read Peeps by Scott Westerfeld? Because the format reminded me of this in that it did a similar thing of playing straight the concept of "what could cause vampires to be real" that drew on inspiration from real life parasites interspersed between the chapters. I dig it. Anyway!)
Reservations
Author: AnnetheCatDetective
Words: 10,000
Chapters: 3/? (Technically unfinished, but leaves off in a satisfying spot)
Rating: Not Rated
Mood: Meta (Character study as story)
“There's some competition for Aziraphale and Crowley's usual table at the Ritz…”
A couple of miracles bend reality and, well… you ever been like, “The boys need therapy, but who could possibly give it to them?”
I love crossovers where the TV boys meet other versions of themselves, this one is my favorite.
i can't say the words, so i wrote you into my verse
Author: mygalfriday (BrinneyFriday)
Words: 5,000
Rating: Teen
Mood: Snapshots through history
"Crowley has tattoos and every few centuries, Aziraphale discovers a new one." Simple and paints a lovely picture.
By Definition
Author: idiopathicsmile
Words: 3,000
Rating: Explicit
Mood: Smutty but fond
A night together after the Ritz fic where Aziraphale is asexual and Crowley isn’t and how that works for them. The dialogue here is positively delightful.
Bark Dust
Author: rfsmiley
Words: 8,000
Rating: Mature (mostly for injuries)
Mood: Whump, Hurt/Comfort, Historical
Crowley is very badly injured in a battle, and Aziraphale has to figure out how to save his life.
Tell Me A Story
Author: brilliant_or_insane
Words: 5,000
Rating: Teen
Mood: Soft and warm
Aziraphale likes telling stories and Crowley likes to listen. But when the demon is dissatisfied by sad endings and can't relate to the happy ones, Aziraphale decides to move them forward by telling a new story. (Of course, Crowley isn't entirely satisfied with the angel's perspective on that one either.)
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Javier Peña req (and Steve as bestie). Y/n is their partner and is feeling extremely burnt out; running on empty, coffee, cigarettes and not much else. She’s barely sleeping or eating and constantly has a tight chest and racing heart. They both know something is up with her but she just shrugs it off until one day, Javi is out on a raid and she reaches her breaking point. Steve manages to get her home but can’t reach Javi until he gets back to the embassy etc. Also, please could you throw in a little Carrillo cause😍
Burned Out (Javier Peña x F!Reader)
A/N: I’ve missed Narcos and my DEA boys, so thank you for this prompt, whoever sent this in. I really appreciate it. I’ve been in a bit of a slump recently with writing for this blog, so it’s great to have something to focus on and pour myself in to - hope you enjoy it!
Warnings: Swearing, smoking, alcohol, reference to depressive / self destructive behaviour, description of a panic attack, mild smut, canon-typical violence, death, reference to drugs / overdosing.
Masterlist
You knew exactly when it started. When you began to feel yourself beginning to sink downwards into the quicksand that was your life.
It was a bad day… well, a worse day, if you were being honest, given that life in general in Bogota was hard and full of bad days that left you feeling numb inside. Whereas you were normally able to banish the darkness by spending time with the friends you had collected since your arrival to the city, not even Javi’s gentle kisses or Steve’s dirty jokes or Connie’s homemade deserts could do the trick.
The day had been bad for many reasons.
One, you’d lost a contact with direct links to Escobar, that you’d spent weeks working on.
Two, you had lost them in a drive-by shooting that had killed not only them but countless civilians too.
Three, some of your asshole colleagues decided to spill coffee all over your files meaning you were forced to work late to re-type them up for a briefing the following morning. Even though you had got it done, you knew you had likely missed some details, the ink far too smudge to even begin to try and understand what had previously been written.
However, that day had only been the start of it. The start of the downwards spiral you found yourself tumbling into.
Sure, the others had noticed there was a change about you. Yet, it wasn’t as if they knew what was causing it or how to fix it.
Javi especially knew what you were like - you were like him after all. Spilling your guts wasn’t your natural reaction to handling things. You kept your emotions bottled up inside of you, cramming more and more in, forcing that lid to remain firmly screwed in place even as the pressure began to build.
And if the lid did threaten to pop off? Well then, you lost yourself in him. In the love that existed between you, and the intimate knowledge you shared of one another. After all, Javi had said it himself, “who needed therapy when you had sex and good whiskey?”
A night of passionate fucking was all it took to take the edge off… to let a little pressure escape, delaying your inevitable eruption… But that was just it; you would erupt. It was inevitable. There was no way on earth you could sustain the relentless routine of long hours spent at work, with coffee doing its best to act as a replacement for your bed.
Hell, you could feel the toll it was taking on you both mentally and physically, from the way your hands shook slightly, to the way your chest felt too tight to breathe sometimes. Then there was the fact your clothes were starting to get baggy, whereas they’d once clung to your frame like they’d been tailored for you.
“Here,” Javi had smiled one afternoon. You could smell the sandwich in his hand before he even set it down on the desk in front of you, accompanied by a packet of chips and a can of your favourite soda. “Grabbed that for you on our way back. Figured you’d forget lunch - again.”
A weak smile tugged at the corner of your lips at the kind gesture. “Thanks, Javi.”
“Anytime, hermosa.” He said it so calmly and easily that you felt your heart skip a beat as you realised how lucky you were to have someone who cared about you so deeply. It was why you made sure to tear a corner off of the sandwich and pop it in your mouth.
The relieved nod Javi granted you told you it was the reaction he’d been waiting for, as he took a step back to let you finish eating and working in peace.
You knew he’d be back to check you’d finished it in a matter of minutes. So, you were quick to chuck the rest of his lunch in the waste paper bin behind you, burying it further under a pile of discarded documents you’d already finished looking through.
It was fine. You’d eat later. Maybe you’d even try and cook dinner for you and Javi… an apology for being so distant lately…
Somehow, despite lacking the gift of prophecy, you knew deep down that that was unlikely to happen. Just as you knew it was unlikely Javi would even make it home tonight. For the last week straight, both he and Steve had been called out on some last minute, late night errands by Carillo - not that you minded all that much.
Not having Javi’s arms to fall into meant you felt less guilty about working late yourself. About only making it back to your empty apartment long enough for a quick shower and a power nap each night.
It was ironic to think of Carillo, though, given that your brief conversations with the Colonel in question had been the closest you’d come to finally releasing some of the hurt and the pain inside of you.
You didn't know what it was about him, but somehow, the Colonel had an ability to draw you out. To make you open up and share things you would never otherwise dream of.
Maybe it was his candour? You’d noticed that about him since you'd started working together; he had a blunt demeanour, saying what he thought regardless of the affect it could have on another person.
Now, it wasn't done with malice, per say, but rather as the result of a man who had the weight of an entire army on his shoulders and an impossible task. He just didn't have the time to bullshit anyone - especially when you both lived in a city full of people all too willing to lie and cheat.
It also came from a weird sense of respect, of seeing people as equals, deserving of the truth just as he expected the same in return. No matter how painful it may be.
Needless to say, it was one of the reasons you'd grown to respect the man - and dare you even say, like.
Still, when he decided to loiter on the other side of your desk, late one night, you felt yourself stiffen, as if suddenly all too aware of every little gesture your body made and what it gave away.
The Colonel missed nothing.
“You look like shit.”
Wow. Don’t beat around the bush.
“Jeez, your wife married a charmer, Colonel,” you scoffed, dragging on your cigarette, sparing him a fleeting glance. “Speaking of, doesn’t she want you back home? Or do you prefer my company that much that you’d rather stand at my desk at 11 o’clock at night?”
“She’s out of the city, visiting her parents,” he rebuffed, clearly not taking the bait as he dropped into the empty seat opposite. In fact, he decided to reach across and steal one of the cigarettes from the packet on your desk, lighting it for himself in a gesture that made it clear he wasn’t going anywhere for now.
“Good for her.”
“Yes, it is. I think time away from this place is good for everyone.”
You could feel the accusation lacing his words, as well as the heat from his continuous stare. “Then why didn’t you go with her? Not enough vacation days?”
He scoffed, a bitter smirk twisting his lips upwards. “You’re funny; I can see why Peña likes you so much. Like calls to like, as they say, even if you try and hide it behind that smile of yours.”
You bit back a laugh. “What can I say? I lucked out in that department and got my Mom’s smile. My sister was not so fortunate. She always had my dad’s features - meaning she looked more often than not like she was sucking on a lemon.”
“This is the sister that died from an overdose, correct?”
“Yes.”
“The anniversary is this week, is it not?”
He asked it so calmly and casually that anyone would have thought he’d asked you what the weather was like outside, or what your favourite record to listen to was.
At least his concern now made sense. It was the kind of detail he would remember, and you were honestly more surprised by the fact it had taken until now for him to bring it up.
He’d probably been itching to ask you about it all day, aware of the date even if your two partners were not. Well, they might have been, but neither had said anything which was your preference if you were being honest. Hence your rapidly cooling demeanour towards your colleague.
“I’m fine, if that’s what you're trying to fish about for, Colonel,” you sighed, staring back down at your desk again in an attempt to dismiss him. “You don't have to worry about me. I’m good. Thanks. So can I get back to work in peace? Or did you have some other question for me?”
Carillo sighed, simply choosing to smoke his cigarette, letting the tension linger along with the steadily growing haze around you both.
He didn't need to say the words aloud; his actions did all the talking for him as he reached over and helped himself to a file off of you desk.
He didn't buy this ‘calm, cool, and collected’ act you were pedalling. Not for a second - something his stare alone gave away, even if he refused to say it. Instead, he chose to read, and work, and smoke along side you so that you would not be alone.
He had his eyes on you... watching and waiting for the moment that your carefully constructed walls came crashing down... the only question was would they crush you in the process?
It was about a month later that the inevitable happened; that you finally hit rock bottom.
It had just been a causal remark that did it, of all things. A casual remark that sent you tipping over the edge.
You had just returned from lunch and hadn’t even sat back down at your desk yet when you noticed that someone was missing.
“Yo, Steve?” you queried, quickly glancing up at the empty seat next to you. “Where did Javi go?”
Now, you couldn't be a hundred percent certain what Steve said next but you knew he’d said something about Carillo, a lead, and a raid ...
“What?”
“I said, Javier went with him,” Steve repeated, staring at you with growing concern. You realised he must have already repeated himself. “What? Why? What is it?”
“Javi went too? He… he’s there? On that raid?”
“Yes, y/n, that’s what I just said - hey! Where you going?”
You didn’t even realise your feet had started moving, not until you heard Steve’s confusion as he yelled after you.
But you didn't stop.
You couldn’t stop, not until you were outside - not until you were far enough from that place that you could actually stop and fucking breathe.
When did it become so hard to breathe?
When had the room become so small?
Why did your mind suddenly feel the need to go to the darkest place possible?
It was just a raid... one of hundreds Javi had gone on since arriving here in the country, just as you had also gone on your fair share. So why was your head suddenly picturing him... lying there... injured, or worse... dead.
The number of bodies you’d stared at, lying in the streets in a macabre tableau that had become all too familiar by now - all part of this fucking job. A job you signed up for, hoping to vanquish the bastards who had taken so much from you and those you loved… yet, every day, it seemed you had failed as more and more innocent people suffered… and to think, that Javi - the man you loved more than anything - who you had neglected terribly to the point you couldn't actually remember the last time you’d woken up next to each other - could be amongst them…
It brought you to your knees.
“Whoah, y/n. Easy. What’s wrong?”
Steve’s voice sounded distant, as if you have been submerged beneath water. Yet, you could tell he was beside you, dropping down onto the kerb before hauling you close. The warmth of his touch was enough to tether you to him, to reality, as everything around you seemed to spin in dizzying circles.
You could feel it as his hands rose, cupping your cheeks, turning your head and trying to get you to look at him.
When you finally did, he could see immediately that your eyes were glassy, like you weren’t really seeing or hearing him.
He knew that look.
“Y/N,” Steve murmured in a soothing voice. “Y/N, look at me. Look at me.”
He paused, waiting until your eyes trained themselves on his face, some of the cloudiness starting to dissipate.
“Good, that’s good. Now breathe. Just breathe,” he instructed, taking a few deep breaths himself to show you how.
It took you a moment or two, but you eventually became fully aware of your surroundings and what your friend was telling you to do.
Following his lead, you took a few shuddering breaths, then a few more. You kept breathing until you could feel the racing of your heart slow and the fear that had felt crippling just moments before begin to ease.
You were exhausted.
Wiping at your face, you tried to banish the tears that had left a salty trail burning down your cheek.
Steve doesn't say anything for a long minute, instead choosing to pull you into his side and light up a cigarette, which he was quick to offer you.
“T... thank you.”
You sat like that for a while... just watching people and cars passing by, smoking like two people on a perfectly ordinary break.
No one bothered to stop and ask you two questions. Hell, no one even shot a glance in your direction, everyone too busy with their own business to stop and give a shit about yours.
So you sat.
And smoked.
And said nothing... not until the cigarette was nothing more than a stub.
Steve was quick to take it from you, before it could burn your fingers. Tossing it aside, it had clearly served its purpose.
He stood and offered you a hand.
His face left no room for debate as he stated calmly, “Come on, I’m taking you home. Now.”
“Come on. A couple more steps, Y/N,” Steve urged, guiding you up the stairs to your apartment.
His hand was warm, firm even, as it pressed against your lower back.
He’d been like this since the moment you’d left the embassy, steering you and hovering over you like he expected you to simply topple over at the slightest breeze.
It was touching, yet irritating all at once - a sentiment you were too busy trying to put one foot in front of the other to even attempt to unpack. You were also just too goddamn tired.
“Here we are.” Steve’s words startled you. “Home sweet home.”
You didn’t remember giving him the keys, but you must have as he opened the door a second later and herded you inside.
There was emotion in your throat - threatening to spill from you. You were holding on by a thread and he knew it. Just as Carillo knew it, and possibly Connie too -
Wait, Connie?
You blinked as you realised that at some point the woman had also entered your home, most likely having been summoned by Steve on the drive home.
You wanted to feel guilty at the thought of her being dragged into your mess, but you were honestly too tired to feel anything other than grateful as she hurried over to you, offering you a cup of what you assumed was tea, as well as two pills.
To help take the edge off, she explained, urging you to take them. Doctor’s orders.
It was impossible to miss the way that they were both staring at each other - sharing anxious glances as you swallowed the tablets and dutifully sipped the tea.
They were worried about you. Hell, you were worried about you, and Javi, and Steve, and everyone else you loved and cared about - that was what had got you in this mess in the first place.
Damn it.
You heard them say as much as you marched yourself to your bedroom, claiming you were going to try and get some rest whilst you waited for news.
If they bought it, you couldn’t tell, but neither protested as you left them.
They simply let you go, allowing you the space and privacy to crawl into your bedroom, bury yourself in the unmade sheets, and lie down for a while. The medication had clearly started to work as you felt heavy... tired...
Lying there, you could hear their voices... faint murmurs drifting down the hall.
You caught only snippets as they tried and failed to keep their voices down, just as your parents had once done when you were just a kid. Still, despite their efforts, you caught enough to know that there was still no word from Javi, or about the raid he went on.
“-called Javi- no reply.”
“Carillo - try again -”
“-worried about her - stressed.”
Eventually, the words began to fade away, replaced instead by your body's sudden need to sleep. It was pointless to fight the drugs now in your system, or the comfort of being wrapped in the bed sheets that still smelled of Javi... not even you were strong enough to fight it as you felt yourself drifting off into sweet oblivion.
"Sweetheart?"
You must have still been dreaming - that was the thought that crossed your mind as you swore you heard Javi's voice.
"Javi?" you moaned, fighting against the grogginess that greeted you as you tried to open your eyes.
Despite the fact it was clearly now dark out, you could easily make out the face in front of you, illuminated from behind by the bedside lamp. The sight was almost angelic - as if some divine being had deigned to answer your prayers and return the love of your life back in to your arms.
“It's ok, I'm here, sweetheart,” Javi purred again, brushing your hair back behind your ear and pulling you close. “I’m right here, ok? In one piece - promise. The raid went off without a hitch. Even snagged ourselves a new asset for you to take a crack at.”
Your eyes shimmered with tears as you quickly burrowed into his chest. You didn't really hear what he was saying, too busy focusing on the fact that he was here to say it at all - here - alive - in your arms.
The reality hit you as you began to let it pour out of you: how relieved you were, how much you loved him. You also grumbled something about fucking telling you when he next decided to run off on a raid without so much as 'goodbye' - else you’d shoot him yourself.
“I’m sorry, carino. I am.”
And you believed him.
"I love you, Javi. So much."
"I love you too," he purred, "and I'm so sorry, I knew you were struggling, but when Steve told me-"
He didn't get to finish whatever the hell he'd been about to say. You didn't let him.
Instead, your lips surged hungrily towards his and as only Javi could, he kissed you back, soft and slow... as if desperate to reassure you through actions alone.
You felt him chuckle into your mouth as you grew impatient, grinding your hips against him in a silent plea for him to fill you. To join you. To bury himself, and the day you'd both had, in a moment of bliss.
It was a special kind of neediness, reserved for just him, and one that was only sated once he had fully joined with you, as one being. Safe. Whole.
Yes, in an ideal world he would have waited until after talking to you to lose himself in such a way. After all, Steve and Connie had filled him in on the troubling turn of events that his absence today had triggered - and he'd be lying if he said the idea didn't scare him shitless, that you had broken down so completely...
He could only thank God that Steve had been there for you - especially when he couldn't be himself.
But he was here now... and you had time to start trying to make sense of this mess. Together. Carillo had assured him of that, informing him in no uncertain terms that you both had the next few days off from work. He didn't want to see either one of you back in the office until you'd begun to sort through the mountain of shit you were buried under.
So, yes. If you wanted to lose yourself for tonight, to use him to forget the world outside for a perfect moment, then he was only too happy to oblige.
He’d wait until the morning to have a proper conversation.
He’d go down and whip you up some breakfast before trying to get you to open up to him about everything that had happened today… about the worries and concerns you’d been keeping locked away inside of you.
Then, after you’d fallen in to pieces in his arms, he could try and start to put you back together again. As a team.
#narcos masterlist#narcos fanfic#narcos imagine#javier peña#javier peña x reader#javier peña x you#javier pena x you#javier pena x reader#steve murphy#connie murphy#colonel carrillo#colonel carillo#ithebookhoarder#masterlist#thesilentmage#pedro pascal
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Hey hey
Hey
Johnny Silverhand's not cool
Johnny's disabled. Johnny had a military issued chrome forced onto him. Johnny treated himself like shit and probably smelled like shit too for it.
Do you think he got therapy for it? No I don't mean mental therapy I mean physical therapy, for the arm, I mean do you think he got physical therapy for a metal arm shoved onto a wound (I don't expect the wound was taken care of anymore than what was strictly practical no of course not), no no he wasn't given therapy, he wasn't given time to adapt, his trauma at losing a trustworthy friend on the field was just stacked with the trauma of just being weaponized even more before being put back on the field for a fucking pointless war, so that means-
I mean you know about amputation? No? No, right, of course not, it'd be weird, right? To know about amputation and implants and prothesis and the psychological impacts in detail you'd need to have read up on it, pretty obsessively at that, too, that's not normal, normal people don't do that, what kind of weirdo has hyperfixations about that because of OCD right? Right.
Well amputations are so fucking traumatizing even if they save your life. Of course they are. It's a part of your body. Your body is not supposed to see its insides and it's not supposed to lose parts either, your brain can't actually compute that, like let's say, cutting your nails?
They put a metal arm on him like cutting nails, they didn't care, he wasn't a person to them he was a tool.
He never got physical therapy for it. He never went to have it recalibrated or maintained. Why would he? I don't even think he knows what model it is. Do you think they bothered telling him? Do you think they gave him a little booklet for "how to take care of your new implant"? Ahahahah of course not that'd be so fucking silly and kind and thoughtful. Of course not.
Johnny needs his addictions. Do you think he has prescribed medicine for the chronic pains that the arm causes him? No of course not. Do you think he started drinking and taking Lace because it was fun? Because it was cool? Because he was gonna be a rockerboy? And he wanted to impress girls.
In the real world, as of 2020, the first cause of mortality in the USA is opiates, and the main demographic is white men, aged 30 to 60, roughly, a large amount of those men war veterans, cumulating psychological trauma even prior to the addiction, even prior to the army itself, cus the majority of people who join the military do it to escape poverty and a dysfunctional household. It's a well oiled machine because at worse they go back to the motherland and die quietly of OD or something else, or best case scenario they have kids! And some of those kids are boys, and out of middle class recrutes, a good part are from military families!
It's a system that works just as designed really.
America, abuse and neglect of your chronically ill and chronically in pain is part of your DNA currently.
Johnny's not cool. He runs hot, he's a fucking spoonie who ran out of spoons before he even joined the military so now all he's got is knives. Knives knives nothing else nothing but knives. Johnny's a man overheating on constant, he's been dying for years, he likely has fevers from his port inflammatory's issues due to neglect, he doesn't know how to take care of himself, he wasn't taught, it's not expected of him, no one in his entourage sees him as what he is, do you remember for one second someone treating him like he was disabled and needed accomodation?
Disabled people whose chronic pains are not given the deserved care are most likely to develop the hardest addictions to cope with it, with the physical pain, and the psychological consequences- namely, psychosis, psychosis is a common consequence for having your pain ignored because this kind of neglect breaks your psyche at its core, at its sense of self.
Johnny has all the symptoms of a man in pain but because American soft power made drug abuse cool people think he's cool for drinking and fucking and killing and coking himself up until he blows himself up. Johnny's not cool, he's a tragedy, he's hurt, he's self-medicating, no he's not going to go cold turkey because he loves Kerry or because he loves your V, love isn't going to fucking save him, if you just erase Johnny's addictions because you think love fixes that honestly fuck you, because I'm tired of people just treating addiction like a bad spot to bleach out of sight, like it's got no roots and it's got no continuation, to no longer need self-medication Johnny would need reparation and better treatment, especially if he's brought back with that fucking arm, why do people not get that he didn't reclaim the arm, he let it take over, for fuck's sake he canonically blames all HIS bad deeds on The Hand, that's not reclaiming, that's self-sabotage.
Johnny dies like a pathetic pawn in Blackhand's plan, and even among people who were supposed to be his own, he's not seen as anything but a hero or a monster. No inbetween. He's not a man to them. He's something to workship, and if he doesn't grant them miracles he's the Devil.
What a load of bullshit.
Fuck, Johnny's not cool. Johnny needed help but didn't even want it because he was so full of violence and hatred he killed himself. But he deserved better nonetheless.
#cyberpunk 2077#johnny posting#cyberpunk 2077 johnny silverhand#johnny silverhand#cyberpunk 2077 johnny#cp77#cp2077#thoughts#i'm upset about how we're taking this bs man at face value when he's so fucking pathetic and i don't mean that as an insult.
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Without Me (Steddie X You)
PLEASE READ EVERYTHING I PUT HERE BEFORE CONTINUING!!
A/N with warnings: This is not a warm fuzzy story. This is riddled with angst and feelings. This version of Steddie aren't bad men they...they just have extremely toxic behavior due to their trauma. Steve struggles with alcohol and Eddie with drugs while the female readers drug of choice is them. She does try to stay away from them but they do not make it easy. An accident involving drunk driving is mentioned with the reader getting hurt and ending up in the hospital. They belittle her and try to make her jealous and reader mentions how their behavior has affected her. There is talk about their fears of losing her and insight into why they are the way they are.
SMUT is present closer to the end. She is a willing participate! I want that clear. It may seem like she's not but she talks about how she needs them to fight for her. Some spit play, slight edging, use of the stop light system (yellow), aftercare.
I was listening to "Without Me" by Halsey and this just flowed from me for like 2 weeks. Its not my normal stuff written wise so again I say ENTER WITH CAUTION! I will still love you if you don't read this. <3.
Word Count: 10,596 ( seriously didn't realize I typed this much)
“They’ve been asking around for you.”, you friend whispers into your ear before blowing out the smoke from her cigarette.
“Well, they can keep asking but the answer will always be no.”
She softly grins as she takes your hand. “I’m really proud of you.”
“For what?”, the new guy you had been seeing jumped on the bench behind you, pulling you tightly to his chest.
“For finally getting my ass up for physical therapy this morning.”, you reply as you beam up him.
“About time.”, he chuckles. “Even though I’m totally fine with you moving like an adorable little sloth.” You roll your eyes as you smack his arm playfully and he leans down to kiss your lips. “Come on. Let me walk you to your class.”
He tangles his fingers with your own as you both head back towards the building. Glen was a good man and the past month you had officially been together had been incredibly easy. That was honestly the best way to describe it. He was kind and gentle with you, always making sure you were alright. When he took you on dates, he pulled out your chair and listened intently to anything you had to say without even a squeak to interrupt.
He didn’t smoke a pack a day or do any kind of drugs that left him so stoned you literally had to lift him from the floor on to his bed. The few times he drank in your presence, it was sips and he rarely finished the can in his hand. He never drank to the point that he slurred his words or passed out and left you to carry him into his house to get him to at least the sofa. Glen never called you names or made you feel guilty about not sharing a vice with him. He never left you crying alone in your room because he was too busy doing something else he shouldn’t be. He never hurt you or broke your heart…
“Hey Y/N.”
The man’s voice hit you like an arrow to your chest. You hadn’t heard or seen him in over two months…either of them.
“She’s not talking to you.”, Glen growled immediately coming to your defense.
Steve stood up straighter as he made himself seem taller. “What the fuck are you going to do about it?”
Without hesitation he stepped forward, bumping the other boy’s chest.
“Hey, hey, hey.”, you reach out to grab your new boyfriend’s arm. “It’s ok. I’m alright.”
His eyes tear away from Steve’s to meet your own as he touches your cheek with his palm making your ex huff.
“I’m going to be right there, ok?”, he advises as he points towards the lockers on the other side of the hallway; kissing your forehead when you nod.
Steve’s eyes glare at Glen until he leaves, turning his attention towards you and promptly softening his demeanor.
“Where’s your attachment?”, you ask as you try to appear nonchalant, placing books in your locker.
“Eddie didn’t want to overwhelm you. He thought us both talking to you might…scare you.”
“Why would I be scared of you two?”, you scoff. “Is that why neither of you came by the hospital or to my house after?”
His jaw tightens as he looks down at his sneakers. “No. We just…we thought your parents wouldn’t want us there.”
“This coming from the boy that used to sneak through my window when he was drunk.”, you chuckle sarcastically to yourself as you slam the locker closed. “You’re still such a terrible fucking liar. Stay away from me; both of you.”
“Y/N, wait—”
“Don’t touch her.”, Glen warns as Steve tries to reach for your hand.
The man watches as your new boyfriend wraps his arm around your waist and guides you towards class as you slightly limp along the way. Angrily, he reaches into his pocket for his always present flask and takes a long swig.
****
“Wow, you really suck at this.”, you giggle as Glen misses another ball on the pool table.
“Look, I’m sorry I’m not as cool as you Miss Suave who can shoot with the stick behind her back.” You grin as he gestures for you to take your turn. What he didn’t know was Eddie taught you that on one of his more sober nights. When the three of you were just able to hang out and have fun. It was hard being here as the cigarette smell reminded you of the nights after they would make love to you or when he would cheer you on while you played arcade games with him and the other Hellfire kids.
It also reminded you of when he snorted to much of his stash and fell asleep with his cigarette in his hand almost burning down his uncle’s trailer. Or when he would light up in the middle of a fight he started with you because some guy smiled at you a little too long.
Shaking your head out of the memory, you make your shot and it promptly slams into the hole in the corner pocket.
“I will never be as cool as you.”
“Oh, I think you’re plenty cool.”, you grin as you crane your neck just enough for his lips to meet you halfway.
“I’m going to run to the bathroom real quick and then I can take you home, ok? Do you want to wait here or…”
“I can wait by the car. Some air would feel really good right now.”
After handing you his keys, you gradually make your way towards his car trying to cover the fact that you were gripping your side. This cold weather was killing your injury. The doctor said that would be normal especially on days it rains. What he didn’t explain was that it would affect everything else like your mobility. Every step you took shot a pain straight through you side and it was like being stabbed.
“Hey sweetheart. Need some help?”
“Jesus fucking Christ.” You turn around meeting Eddie’s concerned gaze. “I guess Steve didn’t talk to you yet."
"No, he did. I just needed to come check on you myself.”
“Welp, I’m fine, Eddie! Now leave me alone.” He flinched slightly at your sarcastic filled tone as you try to continue heading for Glen’s car.
“Why, um, why are you limping?”
You chuckle as you turn on him, throwing your hands in the air. “Oh, I don’t know. That happens when you’re involved in a car accident! But you wouldn’t know anything about that would you?!”
Your boyfriend appears in front of you, blocking you from the metalhead’s sight. “Get the fuck out of here! You and Harrington need to leave her the fuck alone! Come on, baby.” Without any hesitation, Glen lifts you in his arms and carries you the rest of the way.
Eddie watches with jealous eyes as he stomps towards his van and searches for the powder that will numb the pain.
##############
For the next week, you did everything you could to ignore them but you felt their eyes on you constantly. You’d be lying if you said you didn’t miss them. You thought about them every day even after what they had done but you knew what you had with them wasn’t healthy.
“Baby are you alright?”, Glen asked as you both share your lunch.
“Yeah, I’m just exhausted. Mrs. O’Donnell isn’t playing around this year.”, you giggle but your smile tapers off when he doesn’t laugh with you.
“You know, it’s ok that you miss them. They were your best friends.”
If only he knew… What would he think of you if you told him the truth? What if you told him that, yes, it had started as a grade school friendship but escalated to something more? What if he found out how much you loved them and why you kept them around for so long? Why you tried so hard to save them…
A loud crashing startled you back into reality as Eddie jumped on to the table and walked to where you and your boyfriend were sitting.
“Well, hello gorgeous…and Glen.”, he mocks as he turns his head towards him sarcastically.
Steve slides into a chair beside you as the metalhead jumps down and sits across from him.
“Can we help you, gentlemen?”
“YOU can’t.” You cringe as Steve slurs his words. You can smell the bourbon wafting from his lips as he speaks. “We just want to have one conversation with our friend. Is that too much to ask?!”
Glen breathily laughs as he faces both boys. “It’s funny. Y/N never talks about what happened. Anytime anyone including her doctors ask about the accident she says all she remembers is something darting across the road and flipping the car. I admire the fact that she’s still so loyal after what you did.”
“What are you implying?”
“I’m implying that real men own up for their mistakes especially when it almost gets their supposed best friend killed.”, he spits. “Come on, baby.”
You don’t move; you CAN’T move. Memories are flashing through your brain and the two people you want to comfort you most are the two people who are responsible for your pain.
“Stevie, baby, maybe you should let me drive.”
“Pfft, I can drive, honey. I’m barely even drunk.”
Eddie’s arms wrap around you from behind as he tenderly kisses the nook between your neck and shoulder. “Come on, princess. You can sit in the back with me.”
“Y/N, it’s ok. I got you.”, Glen coos as he reached for your arm.
Shakily, you stand pausing for a moment as you turn towards them.
“Stay the fuck away from me.”
****
The loud blaring of your phone beside your bed shook you from your peaceful slumber as you sleepily reached over to answer it.
“H-Hello?”
“Y/N?”
“Steve? What…what’s wrong?” Turning your clock, you sighed as you read 2am and slammed your head back onto the pillow.
“Baby, I’m sorry. I’m so fucking sorry. I didn’t mean to hurt you. I wanted to stay with you but I was so fucking scared and Eddie said you’d be okay.”, he cried tearing your heart in half.
“Steve, why don’t you call him, ok?”
“Please, Y/N. Can we see you?”
“It’s two in the morning. Go to bed.” He sobbed harder and you heard what sounded like him hitting the wall. “Um, where-where are you right now?”
“I’m at home.”
“Ok, I’ll be there in 20.”
****
The entire short drive to his house, you knew you were making a mistake. You made yourself boundaries and promises when it came to them that you were already breaking. It was so hard for you though when they broke. There were many a night like tonight where Steve had cried in your arms after his father had hurt him in some way and downing half a bottle of whatever strong liquor was in the house.
With Eddie it took a lot more for him to get to that place but when he got there it was heavy. Sometimes he would frighten you as he tore his room apart, angrily trashing the things around him or saying anything he could think of to start a fight with you. The few times he cried were the moments he thought you were asleep, pulling you tightly against his chest as he sobbed.
Afterwards, you would do anything you could to make them feel better whether it was making them laugh, going to dinner, or letting them vent their pain on to you in bed. You didn’t mind it at the time especially since they knew every little way to make you cum. It was a blessing and a curse to be in love with two men who were passionate. On good days, the spoiled you, making you feel special as they wined and dined you and afterwards playing your body like one of Eddie’s guitars.
On bad days, they demeaned you and made you feel worthless. They made you feel like nothing you did was enough and then fucked you like a whore.
You should have left them a long time ago but there was a part of you that held on to hope that one day the boys you met all those years ago were still in there.
“Hey, Y/N. Thank you. Thank you for coming.”, Steve sighed in relief as he opened the door for you and you pushed past him to get inside. “I called Eddie. He’s, um…”
The metalhead waved from his spot on the sofa.
“Yeah, well, I’m here. Now talk. You have five minutes.”
“Ok. Ok, ok, ok…um…” You rolled your eyes as Steve tried to collect his thoughts. “Honey, look, we know we fucked up. What we did to you is completely unforgivable.”
“We never would have left you if we thought you were really hurt.”
“Hm, gee, define ‘really hurt’, Ed. Because apparently metal slicing open my side doesn’t count.”
“We had no idea.”
“I’m not surprised, Steve, since you were so wasted you didn’t realize you had swerved to the right and hit a fucking parked car so hard that it flipped yours over!” You felt the tears burn the corner of your eyes. “This was a mistake.”
“Wait, wait! Please.” Eddie reached out to grab your hand and you yanked it away.
“Don’t you fucking touch me!” Your body shook as you began to cry. “You left me…After everything I’ve done for you. After everything I ignored…after cleaning you up after you threw up and passed out.” You gestured towards Steve before turning to the metalhead. “After treating your cuts after someone knocked you on your ass when you snorted your drugs and yelled at a guy in the parking lot because you thought he was hitting on me. After all the fucking bullshit I was there for…when I really need you…you left me! You didn’t even come to the fucking hospital to make sure I was ok. YOU DIDN’T EVEN FUCKING CALL!”
“Y/N…I…we…fuck!”, the metalhead shouted in frustration as threw something against the wall, shattering it on impact.
“There has to be something we can do.”, Steve whispered making you laugh again.
“Nothing, Steven. There is nothing either of you can fucking do. I’m never going to do bullshit like this again. You two are on your own now. Leave me alone and let me be fucking happy with Glen.” As you turned to leave you paused, hearing Eddie snicker behind you. When you shifted back around there was a sinister look in both their eyes you had seen numerous times.
“Speaking of ‘everything we’ve done’…”, Eddie addresses you with that slick tone that tells you he’s angry as he plops back down on the couch, digs in his pocket to produce his white powder, and pours some of it on the glass table in front of him. “You think that asshole can take care of you as well as we can? After all the gifts, dinners, and making you cum till you couldn’t move… we’re just trash now, huh? Is that it?”
You slowly stalk to him as rolls up a piece of paper nearby and snorts the contents in front of him.
“Yes.” He turns to glare at you at your response. “You think everything positive you’ve done wipes away the negative? You think just because you were able to fuck me till I couldn’t walk straight, it will make up for the fact that I literally can’t walk straight because of a car accident you two caused AND RAN FROM?!”
“If we’re so bad then why did you stay?”, Steve countered. “Fuck, Y/N, why are you even here?!”
“Because I’m a fucking idiot! I’ve always been an idiot! If I could go back in time and stop that little girl from befriending those two heartbroken little boys I would.” Tears flooded down your face as you hugged your arms around yourself. “Why, Steve? Why wasn’t I enough? Why did you both have to turn to drinking and drugs? I loved you. I loved you so much.”
Strong arms suddenly wrap around you and you angrily push at his chest. Steve steps forward again, allowing you to hit him knowing he deserves it. Collapsing in his embrace, he holds you as you cry, lifting you up, and carrying you to his bedroom where he lays you in the middle of the mattress, pulling you to his chest after he climbs in beside you. Eddie follows soon after, his limbs circling your waist as he rests his cheek in your hair.
###########
By the time they woke up that next morning, you were gone and to their dismay you weren’t at school. They tried so many times to be sober especially after they started dating you but everything just seemed to get worse. Steve was always terrified you’d realize how much of a pathetic man he was (or at least that was what his dad told him) and you would leave but…you always stayed. So, why did he feel like trash 24/7? Why did he think it was inevitable? Why was he scared all…the…time? The alcohol helped suffocate a lot of that but in turn it amplified the worst versions of himself. For a while he thought that was an ok trade. Being an asshole sometimes is better than feeling like you were nothing but on nights when he’d listen to you cry or hear you beg him to stop drinking, he knew he needed to quit…he just couldn’t. Steve didn’t want to feel those feelings he’d buried in the back of his mind.
Eddie was more or less the same except he was pretty confident someone was going to take you away from them. That you would discard them like his parents had and run off to be happy with someone else while they suffocated without you. That’s why he needed to show you and any other man that dared to come between you guys that you were theirs. Even if he had to fight all of Hawkins he would. Unfortunately, it was a double edge sword. While he knew he would fight for you, like Steve, he felt like it was inevitable that you would leave and he took that out on you constantly by screaming, throwing things, and belittling you. If he could villainize you now, at least when you left maybe it wouldn’t hurt as bad.
Like Steve’s alcohol, Eddie used drugs to dull his pain and the rage that coursed through him. Weed used to be enough to calm him down but after a while it wasn’t so he upped his game. There were days he would snort so much that he could barely move let alone think and he was fine with that.
You had asked them why you weren’t enough and the truth was you were more than enough; you were too good for them and they knew that.
When they first met you, they knew instantly you were special. In the beginning, you were like their vices. You made them feel good, listened to them, and made them laugh. They often wondered what they did to get so lucky to have you in their lives. The first time Steve drank and Eddie did drugs, you knew something was off, heartbroken that they didn’t feel comfortable confiding you. Instead, they distracted you with a kiss, sending you down that path of becoming involved in that way.
What you didn’t know was at the start of your relationship they used intimacy to distract you from what they were doing. After you would fall asleep with a smile on your face, one or both men would sneak away to do what they needed. When they fell in love, that’s when everything got worse and their fears amplified.
Now, what THEY didn’t know was that they were YOUR drug. You thrived on making them happy which you didn’t realize until after accident. Even as you laid in the hospital staring at that stupid, bland white ceiling, you missed them and felt the withdrawals of not having them near you. By the time you were discharged and sent home, you felt clear headed and purged of their toxicity. When you met Glen and he made you smile, you felt like you were finally free of them and headed in the right direction.
The biggest mistake was thinking you could avoid them forever which is why you set your boundaries and told yourself to stay away. You vented to your date on the phone and he cheered you on constantly boosting your self-esteem while offering anything he could to help make things easier for you.
For your sanity and theirs, you needed to let your boys go. You prayed maybe if you stayed away, it would convince them to start healing. That’s all you ever wanted for either of them…for both Eddie and Steve to be happy.
****
“Wayne?”
“Hey, Y/N. How are you doing?”
“I’m doing alright, thank you. Is everything ok?”
“Um, no. I just wanted to drop by and see if my nephew is here or if you’ve seen him at all these past two days?”
“No, Wayne. I’m so sorry. We don’t talk very much anymore.”
Eddie’s uncle scans your face as he nods before backing away from your front door to head back to his truck.
“If you hear from him, can you let him know to call me? I’m worried.”
You promise him you will as you close the door and lean against you, sighing. You have an idea of where he might be but you knew if you told Wayne and he caught Eddie with drugs again he would follow through with his promise of calling the cops and have him arrested.
“Now, Edward, I already dealt with an alcoholic brother. He never listened to me and I couldn’t force him to go to rehab but I can with you! You’re my responsibility, goddamn it! You deserve better, son. Get your life together…”
Gnawing on your nail, you grab your jacket as you run out the door.
############
You spotted them immediately when you pulled up to Hawkins Public Swimming Pool. They were so out in the open, you were surprised no one had reported them already. Even though Steve had a pool, they always seemed to like to hide out here. Usually, it was just the two of them, both toxicities bouncing off each other as they vented about things.
The first time you found them here was before you even started dating. Steve’s dad had screamed at him about not making the varsity basketball team his 7th grade year and told him he was a failure. He didn’t show up for school the next day so you got on your bike, riding around until you found them both swimming. From that point forward if you lost one of them and were worried, it was the first place you searched.
“Well, well, well.”, Steve slurred.
“Long time no see, princess. Came to check on your trash?”
You scowled at him as you crossed your arms over your chest. “Wayne is looking for you, Ed. He says you didn’t come home last night.”
“What do you care? You don’t love us anymore, right?”
“Just because I’m furious with you doesn’t mean I stopped caring about you.”
“Not in our experience.”
“With me, Eddie, or bullshit people from you past?”, you growled. “One of our MANY problems. You both comparing me to your parents which fucking hurts. I don’t know if you realize that.”
Steve stood up from the chair he was leaning back on and came to stand in front of you. He was so close the bourbon smell was making you feel a little drunk but it was more so due to the cologne smell underneath that always had you clinging to him when you three went out. You loved his signature smell, his and Eddie’s, but hated that it was normally obscured by other things.
“Do you remember when we were kids and we used to swim in my pool at like 2am? You weren’t the best swimmer but with my help you got better.”
A blur suddenly swished passed you as Eddie ran and jumped into the pool behind you. You turned right as his soggy frame came back up for air with a huge, toothy smile on his face.
“Eddie, oh my god! It’s cold out here. You’re going to get sick.” You try to suffocate the smirk that wants to be seen. You loved seeing them genuinely smile like the metalhead was right now.
“Oh, calm down, mom. I’ll be fine and so will you.”
“Steve, no.” Right as you spun around to warn him, his palm connected with your body and shoved you into the water. While you were underneath you heard another splash as his lanky frame came into view. As you popped through the surface, your arms promptly clung around the metalhead’s necks as you gasped.
“I got better! It doesn’t mean I actually can.”, you laugh as he obnoxiously swims around you two. For a moment, you forgot what happened. You forgot about the accident and that you were angry with them. You forgot all your boundaries you had set in place for yourself and for just a moment felt like everything was how it used to be.
“Don’t worry, sweetheart. I got you.” Eddie’s palms gripped your thighs as he wrapped your legs around his waist and held on to you as they floated around.
“Why do you both come here when you want to hide?”
“Hmmm… reminds us of an easier time, I guess. Plus, no chance of our parents coming in and berating us.”, Steve sighed.
“Wayne would never berate or belittle you, Eddie.”
“Yeah, I know, but I hate seeing that disappointed look on his face. Hey, Harrington, did you see that new Tom Cruise movie coming out? The three of us should go see it.”
You exhaled at his deflection as the reminders came crashing back down.
“Glen isn’t really a fan of his.”
They both grumbled at the mention of his name. “I don’t think when Munson said three he meant us and your bitch boyfriend.”
You chuckled sarcastically at his words as you tried to pull away but Eddie clung to you tighter. “Let me go, please.”
“Oh, please. Did you hear that, Stevie? Our girl has manners now. Did he teach you that?”
“No, he showed me respect and what being loved is really like.”, you spat as you continued to try and push away from him. “And I’m not your girl. Not anymore.”
“You think we don’t love you?”, Steve asks as he swam to your sides.
You stop moving then as all previous memories with them flash through your mind. They see you disassociating as the boy beside you brushes your hair away from your face, a little sigh of pleasure escaping when you don’t flinch away from him.
“I’ve always found it amusing that you two are afraid of becoming your parents, yet you ended up becoming exactly like them.”
Thrown of guard, their eyes slowly darken in anger as you continue.
“Steve, when your drunk and having a bad day, you call me whore and tell me I’m worthless. There was one night, you told me I’d never measure up to being good enough for a Harrington so I should feel lucky you even bother with me. Eddie, when your high and having a rough day, you throw things and squeeze me kind of like you are now. You’ve never hit me but you’re not gentle with me either. One night, I was taking you home from The Hideout and some guy held the door open for me as I carried you. The entire ride home, you screamed at me because I thanked him and said I had your permission to go back and fuck him like the slut I was.”
“You hurt me like they did you and I allowed it because I loved you so much. I changed things in my life to be there for you but you guys could never do the same. Then, like your parents, when I really needed you, you left me. If you love me…why do you insist on being the way you are?”
They stared at you for what felt like forever and it killed you. Not because it made you uncomfortable but because you would give anything to wrap your arms around them and laugh with them as you continued to swim. You didn’t want this, you never wanted this.
“Loved? You don’t love us anymore?”, Steve asked.
Your jaw clenched as you held your resolve. “No. I don’t.”
“I don’t believe you.”, Eddie growled.
“Well…that’s you’re problem. Not mine.”
“Say it then. Say the entire sentence. If you do, we’ll leave you alone and you’ll never hear from us again.”
“N-No, Steve and Eddie.”, your voice cracked as you said their names. “I don’t…don’t…”
The metalhead’s forehead fell on yours as your tears began to fall. “I love you. I’ve loved you since the moment I met you, baby.”
Slowly, his lips move forward to land on yours. When you don’t pull away or stop him, he grows bolder until you’re reciprocating and your arms are around his neck.
Your heart abruptly catches up with your brain as you push him away with all the energy you can muster and climb out of the pool, running to get to your car. Just as you open the door, a heavy palm slams it shut and you’re forcefully turned around as Steve’s lips crash to yours. Your arms circle around him as he lifts you up by your thighs and presses you against your vehicle.
“I love you to—mmm—so fucking much, Y/N. I-I-we can be better.” He groans as his lips trailed down your cheek to your neck and your fingers gently tug on his hair. “I’ll stop drinking. I-I’ll do whatever you want, baby. Please.”
Pushing him back, he drops you to your feet as you smack him.
“The problem is, I don’t believe you. How many times have you promised me that, Steve?! Eddie?!” You turn to the boy you was now leaning against the hood of your car. “This is the last time I’m saying this. Stay away from me.”
You open your car door but he slams it again.
“Who do you think you are, Y/N?!”, Steve screams as he steps towards you sandwiching you between himself and the car. “We didn’t ask you to fucking come here. YOU showed up! You showed up at my house! You can’t keep getting mad at us for not ‘leaving you alone’ when you don’t fucking stay away! You obviously still fucking love us so why are you making this so fucking complicated!?”
“Obviously, I’m not like you. It’s harder for me to stay away when someone I care about is hurting.” You take off your shirt and toss it in his face. “THIS is what loving you two got me!”, you shout as you point to the massive wound on your stomach. Their eyes widen as they look you over.
“It’s been over two months and it’s still healing. Can you fucking believe that? I was in surgery for twelve hours after the ambulance brought me in. Some metal from your BMW sliced into me and I lost a lot of blood. The doctors said the only reason I didn’t fucking die was because it had managed to miss all the major veins and arteries. I was out for almost three days and when I woke up apparently the first thing I asked about was you two. When they told me I was the only one found, I didn’t believe it. ‘No. They’ve done some fucked up shit but they would never abandon me.’”
“I waited for you…every…day…I waited. It took a while for me to really lose hope though. When I had my first physical therapy session to help me walk normally again, I thought ‘This will be the day. I want to get back to normal as quickly as possible so when they come see me I can show them how well I’m doing.’ When they discharged me, I considered maybe then I’d hear from you since no one would be constantly checking up on me. I even left my window unlocked thinking you might sneak in. Nothing… but do you know who did check in on me? Glen.”
“Glen called me every other night to talk to me while I cried about my pain. He came over and watched movies with me while I was stuck in bed. He held me when I woke up from nightmares after falling asleep because of my pain medication. Glen, someone who I met only a year ago was there for me when my BEST FRIENDS who I’ve known since we were kids and supposedly love me DID NOTHING.”
“So, get a good look, boys, because next time you call I won’t be there. You finally get to live your fucking lives without the one person who actually gave a damn!”
##############
“Babe? Are you alright?”
“Huh? Yeah, baby, I’m fine.”, you grin as you lean against Glen’s shoulder at your lunch table.
It had been almost a month since that night at the public pool and you were proud you were able to stick to your guns. They had called a couple of times and each time you ignored it. You had seen Steve stumble out of the locker room after school giggling with a girl as he buckled his pants and kept walking as she practically carried him to her car. You caught Eddie passed out at the arcade on the pin ball machine and left him there as people around him chuckled. Every time you were able to let them go, you felt yourself getting a little stronger but that didn’t mean this wasn’t killing you.
“Hey, I have an idea. Why don’t we go see a movie tonight? That Tom Cruise movie is playing.”
“Oh, sweetheart, we can watch something else. I know you aren’t a big fan—”
“Y/N, you like him so I don’t mind. Seeing you smile is all I care about.”
“Aw.”, you coo as you pull him in for a hug. “That’s so gross.”
Glen laughs as he leans down to kiss your lips.
***
“Well, holy shit.” Your eyes squeeze shut at the sound of Eddie’s voice as you and your date walk up the stairs in the auditorium. “Stevie…STEVE! Look, its Y/N and her idiot.” The metalhead mocks as he tugs Steve off of his date he was already heavily making out with. A twinge of jealousy pierced your heart but you suffocated it as you glared at them both.
“I thought you hated Mr. Cruise, Glen.”, he slurred as he laughed.
The girl beside the metalhead kept sucking on his neck as her hand rested on his upper thigh.
“Come on, honey.”, your boyfriend grabbed your hand and pulled you towards your seats. “Jesus, how could you tolerate being their friends for so long?”
“They weren’t always like that. When I first met them they were shy and sweet. Steve used to make me little cards for valentine’s day and Eddie would sing me some random love ballad.”, you giggle at the memory until your eyes glaze over with his sadness. Glen tenderly pets your head before wrapping his arm around your shoulders and pulling you to his side.
Throughout the movie your eyes kept shifting their way as the continued to make out with their dates. They were doing this on purpose, they were trying to hurt you. Normally when you three went to the theater together Eddie would lift your legs over his lap as you leaned back against Steve. They would tenderly run their palms against your skin as they watched whatever film was in front of you. They rarely if ever were sexual with you here and honestly you never really thought about it. You just enjoyed the tenderness of these moments when you had them.
You noticed the parallels in the movie immediately and so did Steve as you watched him disconnect from the girl he was kissing. A football star from a small town wanting to get out and make something of himself while not being ‘good enough’ for the people around him. Halfway through, he stopped paying attention to his date all together as he focused his eyes in front of him. You wanted to hold him and tell him everything would be ok. That he deserved to be happy; they both did. Curling your body into Glen’s side, he wrapped his arm tighter around you as he kissed your forehead.
****
“You know, I must say that wasn’t too bad. ‘We didn’t quit! You did!’”
You giggle at his enthusiasm as you guys head for his car.
“So, does that mean you’ll see his next one with me?”
“If you come watch a Clint Eastwood movie with me.”, he laughs as you stick out your tongue in disgust. “As long as I’m with you, baby, I don’t care what we see or do.”
Glen’s lips lean down to kiss yours as you wrap your arms around his neck. As his kisses grow more passionate, he carefully lifts you up, and places you on the hood of his car. Your brain began to wonder as his mouth did the same down to your neck. Your boyfriend was a good man and a really good kisser. You hadn’t been intimate with him sexually yet and with everything going on you were okay with that but that was just a double edge sword. BECAUSE with everything going on, you desperately wanted to be fucked.
Your exes were phenomenal at that. When you felt low (usually because of them), they pounded into you till you were begging them to stop and even then they didn’t. You guys had a safe word but you had never used it. Oddly enough they had never crossed that line in bed. As you felt Glen’s lips suck on your skin, you couldn’t help but wonder if he had it in him to fuck you like that.
The sound of screeching tires brought you both back into the moment just in time to see Eddie’s van just inches from your boyfriend’s vehicle.
“Have you lost your fucking mind, you fucking freak?!”, one of the girls screamed as she punched his arm. “What the fuck is wrong with you?!”
Through the windshield you could see them both glaring at you but especially Eddie. You saw that look so many times but this was the first time he had ever actually seen you kissing someone else.
“Babe, get in the car, ok?” As Glen reached for your hand, the boys finally moved. The metalhead opened his driver’s side door and stomped to the back, flinging open the doors.
“OUT! Get the fuck out!”
“Fine! We’d rather walk then spend any more time with you two.”
“Y/N, look at me. Get in the car.”
The sound of the skidding tires thrust you into your memory of that night; the tires screeching, glass breaking, metal crunching… them shouting at each other…
“Y/N?”
“Eddie, let it go, man.”
He barely heard his friend as he came around the car and grabbed Glen’s shoulder, flipping him around, and shoving him against it. His fist was raised in the air but as it hovered your boyfriend grabbed his collar.
“Do you really want to do this now? After you scared her half to death? I guess it’s not enough you two almost killed her. You have to keep twisting the knife, huh?”
“You keep saying bullshit like that but what proof do you have?”
“Beside my fucking brain? Oh, I don’t know, maybe it’s the fact that I have a nose and can smell the drugs and bourbon. Maybe, because I’ve smelled it on you and still watched her get in a car with you. Speaking of, where’s your BMW, Steve?” Glen pushes Eddie off of him and faces them both, gesturing towards you. “This isn’t the first time she’s shut down like this. When she does it’s hard to get her back but she does mumble. Do you know what she says every single time? ‘Please don’t leave me.’” He shakes his head in disgust. “Neither of you deserved her friendship.”
Reaching for your arm, he guided you to the passenger side and opened the door.
“Probably why we were more then just friends.” Your bag fell as Eddie spoke, your wide eyes turning towards him. “Oh, let me guess. You didn’t tell Captain America here that you were fucking us to, did you?”
Glen looked you up down as his body froze.
“Please…”
“Give me a fucking break with that pathetic little girl routine. She’s a wild one, Glen. Definitely too much woman for one man.”
“Stop it.”
“Stop what? Telling him the truth? Trust me, bud. The stories we could tell you about her. Fuck me…”
“Stop.”
“…There were times we didn’t even have to ask. You could just push her into an empty classroom and fuck her tight little pussy till she cried and she would still beg for more…
“Eddie.”
“…Oh and wait until she sucks your cock. She can take it so far down her throat—”
“STOP IT!” You charged at him, screaming and crying as you smacked his chest. “WHY?! Why can’t you just let me be happy!? I hate you! I hate you! I…”
Strong arms held you back and pulled you away from the metalhead as Steve moved to his friend’s side.
“I hate you both.”
“Come on, Y/N. There we go.”, Glen soothes in a gentle tone as he guides you into his car. He flashes them one last cursory glance before climbing into the driver’s side and speeding away.
############
You and Glen sit in silence as he turns off his car outside of your house.
“Is it true?”
Closing your eyes, you heavily exhale before you answer. “Does it matter?”
“Jesus.”, he sarcastically chuckles as he turns his head to glare out the window. “I don’t even know what to say.”
“Nothing to say.”
“It would explain why you’re so protective over them.”
“No. I WAS protective over them because I used to love them…even before we became intimate.”
“Psh was.”
“I don’t love them anymore.”
“Oh yeah? Why don’t you go to the station then and tell Hopper who was really driving that night. Let them experience the consequences of what they did without the safety net of you getting them out of trouble.”
“You don’t understand.”, you whisper.
“You’re right. I don’t.”
“Glen…”, you pause as you try to gather your thoughts. “When I met them, they were both in a bad place even as kids. Eddie had just moved in with his uncle after his dad was arrested. His body was splattered with bruises. It…”, your voice cracked at the memory. “Steve wasn’t at the king status he is now. He hid any chance he could so no one would notice he was crying because his dad had told him he was worthless that morning. I remember our first in-depth conversation he looked at me and asked me why I was even talking to him because he wasn’t someone worth being friends. They needed me. Someone who would listen to them and—”
“Use?”, he interrupted making you sigh again. “Y/N, MAYBE, in the beginning you were exactly what they needed but now…now you’re like another drug to them. You realize that right? They use you whenever they need to feel better, take advantage, and then leave. They aren’t little kids anymore, sweetheart. They are grown men who know what they are doing and they know every time you’re going to bail them out.”
“Thank you for the movie. I’ll see you tomorrow at the party.”, you mumble as you start to open the door, now physically exhausted from this whole evening.
“Y/N…Maybe we should take a break.”
You laugh under your breath as you get out and slam his car door, stumbling inside of your house as you sit at the base of your stairs and cry.
***
They watched you from a far as you danced your way back to the punch bowl for the fifth time that evening. You had shown up to the party that Saturday alone and as soon as you walked in you began drinking which was something they would normally do but not you. This was wrong. You couldn’t be like them. You had to be better than they were especially since you were their angel, their saving grace.
Steve huffed, having enough of the sight before him as he stomped to your side and grabbed your wrist.
“Y/N, stop. You’ve had enough.”
“Oh, really Steve Harrington? You’re telling me when I’ve had enough?”, you cackle as you yank your arm back and dip the cup into the bowl. Before it can reach your lips, he pulls it from your grasp making you whine. “Jesus fucking Christ. Isn’t this what you always wanted? Me getting wasted with you while the freak gets stoned.”
You continue to drunkenly laugh making them both glare at you.
“Y/N Y/L/N, I’m warning you.”, he growls as you reach another cup and fill it.
“What are you going to do, Stevie? Ruin my relationship? Your partner in crime already did that. Accidently almost get me killed? We can check that off. Break my fucking heart…” You raise your glass in their direction. “Done and done.” After chugging back the liquid, you feel your body begin to sway. “Steve…” Suddenly, it feels like your legs no longer work as you fall into his arms.
Effortlessly, he lifts you up against his chest and carries you out the door. Your mind drifts in and out as things happen around you. You feel quick movement that you assume is a car driving.
“No! No!”, you grumble as you fight against something holding you.
“Y/N, calm down. We’re in Eddie’s van. Everything’s ok.”
Your head violently shakes before your eyes get heavy and you feel yourself fading. “Don…don leave…don’t leave me again.”
When your eyes open once more, you’re being carried again and you smell cigarette smoke in the air. You mumble something but your struggling to form words as you feel your body being laid flat on something soft.
“Hospital?”
“No sweetheart. You’re at my trailer. Just sleep it off, ok?”
“Are they ok?”
“Who, honey?”, the other boy asked.
“Steve and Eddie. Did they…get hurt?”, you start to drunkenly sob. “Please…are they safe?”
“Y/N, go to sleep, baby.”, Eddie soothed as you felt his arm wrap around you and your mind finally shut off as you passed out.
***
“We’re assholes.”
You wake up a few hours later but keep your eyes closed when you hear their gravelly voices on either side of you.
“What’s your point?”
“Munson, look at her!”, Steve hisses. “She’s never been like this. She’s never been so…angry.”
“Well, what the fuck should we do, Harrington? We love her and she loves us to. I know she does. It’s good that preppy fucker is out of the picture.”
“I don’t like this…”
“Oh? Then tell me, Steve. Why did you let Olivia Samuels suck your cock in the locker room last week? Or make out and fucking grind on that girl you brought to the movies? Why are you still drinking alcohol like its fucking water?!”
“Really, Eddie? You want to lecture me right now? You were the one that always flipped out anytime anyone would even look at her! I’m surprised you even fucking noticed with how many times you’re so fucking high on that blow you pass out wherever your body lands.”
They both become silent but you can feel the heated energy between them.
“Look…”, the metalhead sighs. “We can do better. We can be what she needs. We just…”
“What do I need?”, you mumble as your eyes finally open. “What do I need, Eddie?”
“You need us to stop idiots, to give up our vices. You need us to love you the way you deserve.”
You shake your head as you sit up and rub your eyes.
“You’ll never understand. I gave up on trying to make you a long time ago. I need to go home.”
As you try to slide of the bed, Steve’s palm grips your arm and pulls you back down. “Explain it to us then.”
“I need you to actually love me.”
“What the fuck are you talking about, Y/N? We do.”
“Flush your stash.” Eddie’s eyes search yours as you glare confidently back at him. “Flush your stash and tell Wayne what you’ve been doing. Let him help you get clean.” You shift your gaze towards Steve. “Throw away the flask in your back pocket and pour out all the booze you have hidden around your room. Come clean about the accident and tell Hopper you need help getting sober.”
Neither boy moves or says anything and you laugh as you slide out of bed searching for your shoes.
“What does that have to do with loving you? Huh? We can give up all that crap without us having to get in trouble.”
“It’s accountability, Eddie! That’s what I need! I need you to take responsibility for your vices and the damage they fucking caused. You say you love me and I don’t doubt that. I really don’t. But the truth is and always has been, that you love that stuff way more then you ever loved me!”
You feel the tears start to surface but you refuse to let them see as you suffocate them down.
“Glen was right. I’m just another drug for you two to use and, honestly, you’re like a drug to me but unlike you I’m strong enough to let you go.”
As you reach for the door, a strong hand grabs your arm and shoves you against the wall.
“Miss high and mighty over here. You want to play that game? You’re weak just like us according to you. ‘I’m strong enough to let you go.’” You cringe as Eddie mimics your tone. “If you’re so fucking strong then follow through, little girl. Say you don’t love us. My offer still stands from the pool. Say you don’t love us anymore and we’ll leave you the fuck alone.”
“Even if I do say it, you won’t. With the way things are now, you two can barely function without me.” You giggle as his eyes darken with anger. “Seriously. For the past 3 months you haven’t notice you have gotten worse? And not just with the booze and drugs. Steve…Olivia told everyone that you came early.” As you laugh harder, you can see them getting angrier but at this point you don’t care. “She said…that’s why she stopped at a blow job because she didn’t think you could make her cum even though you offered. And you Eddie, did you know they have private Hellfire meetings without you? Dustin is their Dungeon master now.”
Steve abruptly comes from the side and throws you over his shoulder as he carries you back to the bedroom kicking and screaming before tossing you back on the mattress.
“Say it. Say our fucking safe word and I’ll take you home so you can continue sitting up there on your self-righteous pedestal.”, he growls as he straddles his body on top of yours.
“Fuck you!”, you shout as you spit in his face. You push against his hold on you but he’s stronger, keeping you down with one hand as he uses his other to wipe off your saliva.
“Open. OPEN YOUR MOUTH, Y/N!” When you don’t do as he commands he pinches your cheeks between his fingers forcing your mouth to pout open before spiting between your lips onto your tongue. “Swallow it. We both remember how good you are at swallowing things.”, he snickers. “Eddie, can you help me?”
The metalhead, who had been watching the whole thing unfold thus far, climbed onto his bed so he could unbutton your jeans and pull them down.
“5 bucks she’s dripping.” Eddie pressed his fingers against the fabric of your panties between your legs. “Oh, yeah. What’s wrong, sweetheart? Fucking boy scout hasn’t been taking care of you?”
“Believe me, he has. He’s made me cum harder than you both ever did. Probably because he was actually fucking coherent.” You wiggled enough to get Steve off of you and push Eddie backwards as you ran into the hallway. The metalhead was faster, catching your arm, and shoving you against the wall. Holding his palm against your chest, he pinned you against it as he tore off your underwear and sunk down to his knees.
You gasped when his mouth wrapped around your clit as his tongue worked its magic. This is what you needed and they knew that; it was something they were good at. For a while you thought maybe it was the roughness that allowed you to relieve some of the stress you always built up especially when it came to them but after not having them for so long you realized it was so much more than that. You enjoyed the idea of them needing you. Of doing whatever possible in the moment to make you stay and make you theirs.
Lifting your leg over his shoulder, he pressed his face further into your cunt making you moan as you clung to his hair on the back of his head.
“Why do you fucking lie to us?”
“Mmm…I don’t.”
“Yes, you do, honey. First you say you don’t love us and then you claim that your boyfriend is better in the sack than we are. Come on, baby.”, Steve coos as he leans on his arm by your side.
“I-I—fuck—I don’t…he is better.” Just as the coil was about to snap, Eddie stopped and abruptly rose to his feet. “No! No, please.” Your hands cupped his face as his fingers took over and he pushed two inside of your entrance, moving them so fast the sound of your arousal filled the hallway. “Please.”
“Don’t lie. Tell us the truth.”
“Why do you get to lie…but…but I can’t!”
“Because you’re better than us.”, Steve answered. “We all know that.”
You whine as he cuts your pleasure short again and as you begin pushing back against them, Eddie holds you still with this shoulder as he straightens his arm and moves his fingers again to build you up. “Please…”
“Say it, Y/N.”
“I’ve—mmm—I’ve never slept with him! We haven’t even done anything besides kiss.”, you cry as your arms circle around his neck. “Please, Eddie. Please.”
“You can cum, sweetheart. That’s it. Use my fingers to cum.” Your hips grinded against his hand as you clung tightly to him. “There you go. Come on, pretty girl. I can feel you squeezing me.” Your body shuttered as you came and his free arm promptly caught you as your knees buckled.
You crashed your lips to his, humming at that familiar cigarette taste as his tongue grazed your own. Your fight wasn’t as forceful this time as you pushed him to get away. Falling to the floor, Eddie wrestles with you, pushing you onto your stomach, and holding you down with his palm between your shoulder blades as you listen to him unbuckle his belt and jeans.
“One lie down, one more to go. Tell us you love us, princess.”
“I hate you.”, you grumble into the carpet below you.
“Did you hear that, Stevie? She fucking hates us!” Your body trembles as he runs the tip of his cock between your folds. “You should tell that to your pussy honey because it’s just sucking me in.”
You both groan as he guides himself fully into you and you force down the tears of happiness that try to push free. They always felt so good inside of you, knowing exactly what you needed and how to get you there. As Eddie thrust into you roughly, you felt fingers brush your hair away from your face and you opened your eyes to meet Steve’s who was lying beside you.
“Say it, baby. We know you do. Why do you keep torturing yourself?”, he murmured as he continued to pet your head. “I mean look at you. How long as it been since anyone made you feel good like this?”
Lost in the feeling of you, Eddie pushed you further into the carpet causing you to squeak and wince as you grabbed your side while the other boy’s hand shot out to grip his friend’s arm.
“Y-Yellow. I’m sorry.”, you cried and the metalhead shook his head as he pulled out and slowly turned you onto your back.
“No reason to be sorry, sweetheart. You’ve never had any reason to be. Unlike us assholes.”, he softly chuckled as he laid on top of you making sure most of his weight was on his forearms. “Is this ok? Am I hurting you?”
Wrapping your hand around the back of his neck, you tug his lips to your own. Reaching between your bodies, you grip his cock and guide it back into your core.
“I love you.”, you whisper as his glassy eyes quickly scan over your face trying to get a read on you. “I love you, Eddie Munson, so much.”
His head fell beside yours as he thrust his hips into you, panting into your neck as your nails ran down his back and into his hair.
“I love you to, Y/N. I’m sorry, princess. I’m so fucking sorry for everything. For—fuck—for what I said at the theater. For yelling at you and being jealous all the time. Oh my god… For leaving you there that night.” You mewled as he pumped into you harder, his cock repeatedly hitting that spot inside you that had you suffocating the screams of pleasure that wanted to escape.
“It was my idea, Y/N. I told him we should leave. I-I told him you’d be fine. I’m so sorry.”
You barely heard him as your legs wrapped around his waist. It was all things you had heard before and he still wasn’t mentioning what you really needed from him, what you had mentioned before about flushing his stash. He wasn’t even acknowledging that the drugs were part of why he did the things he did.
“I know, baby. Make me cum, Eddie, please.”
Pushing up on his hands, his hair tickled your face as he picked up his pace, groaning as his eyes squeezed shut.
“Say it again, sweetheart, please. Tell me that you love me.”
As you closed your eyes, flashes of the boy you met all those years ago passed through your mind. The boy who made you laugh, who wrote songs for you to strum on his uncle’s guitar which was a bit too big across his chest. The man who took you to concerts and danced with you in the aisle at the movie theater as you waited for it to start.
“I love you, Eddie.”
Arching your back, your hands gripped his forearms as you came. The metalhead grunted at the feeling as you tightened around him, slamming into you till you felt him warm your insides with his release.
Collapsing to the side of you, he tried to catch his breath as you turned to find Steve starring at you with those beautiful but needy eyes.
“I love you to, Steve Harrington.”
He exhaled heavily in relief as he delicately slid you closer to him and placed his lips on yours. It didn’t take long for his kisses to become passionate and he spun you on to your side till your back was against his chest. He fumbled with his belt and pants before pushing them down as much as he could, lifting up your leg by your thigh, and guiding himself into your entrance.
His heavy breathing filled you ear as you lean back into his warm chest reminding you of the boy who held you close to him while you three would swim in the lake. The boy who pretended not to be scared by horror movies but always jumped and pulled you closer after any scary scene. The man who showed up with flowers randomly because he said he was just thinking about you and wanted to get you something nice.
“I love you, baby. I’m…I’m sorry to. I shouldn’t have left you and we shouldn’t have stayed away. I’m a fucking coward, honey.” Your arm looped around his neck as you kissed his lips. “I don’t know what we would have done if we lost you, Y/N.”
“You did.” His rhythm slowed as he looked down at your face. “You haven’t had me for months. Did things better?”
Steve’s jaw tightened as he wrapped his arms tightly around yours and began pumping into you slow and deep making you groan.
“Things will get better, Y/N. I promise. I don’t care what I have to do. Fuck my dad, fuck these people, fuck this town!”
Eddie’s worried eyes met his as your face scrunched and your nails dug into his skin.
“Am I hur—”
“No. No. Harder, Steve. Please.”
The sound of skin slapping skin echoed through the trailer as he did what you asked.
“Is that what you need, baby girl? Fuck…I’ll give you anything.”
As his fingers reached down to play with your clit, his other hand gripped your throat as you tilted back moaning his name as you came. His own face scrunched in pleasure as his mouth fell open and with a few more rough thrusts came inside of you as well.
You laid on your back staring at the ceiling as you tried to control the urge to cry. There was a part of you that wished you could back to before the accident when you were still slightly ignorant to their behavior. When they would scoop you up and give you a bath, curl up with you in bed, and talk about different things.
That was always just an illusion though and it was now completely shattered. Eddie lifted off your shirt as Steve carried you to the shower, turning it on for you, and held your hand as you stepped inside. As he sat on the counter, from behind the shower curtain, you heard his heavy sigh before the quiet clinking of his flask pushed through the silence.
When you stepped out, he softly smiled and handed you a towel as he led you back to Eddie’s room. The boy quickly wiped his nose before grinning in your direction and handed you his clothes you used to sleep in but his smile faltered when you hesitated.
“I’m sorry. I just assumed you would sleep here like you used to.”
It was your turn to smile but it didn’t stop the tears that began to flow. They reached for your hands and pulled you between them, whispering promises they could never deliver as the comforted you.
###########
#steddie#toxic! steddie#steddie angst#steddie smut#steddie fanfiction#eddie munson#steve harrington#eddie munson smut#eddie fanfic#fan fiction#joe keery#joseph quinn#stranger things#eddie stranger things#steve harrington smut#steve harrington stranger things#steve harrington angst#eddie munson angst#eddie munson stranger things#toxic!Steve harrington#toxic!Eddie munson#steddie x you#steddie x y/n#steddie x reader#steddie fan fiction#toxic love#toxic relationship#Spotify
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what wasn’t there before II ✩ Jake sully
contents. 18+ g!reader, dbf!jake, cute names, fluff, adult behavior, age gap
summary. Jake was your father’s best friend but to him, he was like his brother. When you entered puberty, you started to feel foreign feelings about him that certainly, you shouldn’t have been having. When you got a bit older, you grew closer to him and you noticed that he acted the same way toward you.
notes. the love yall give me makes me wanna tear up fr :( also its not edited so sorry for typos and mistakes :/
The last couple of weeks were a rush of adrenaline. The sneaky touching and pecking when your father had his back turned was thrilling but it only pushed you to do it more. Jake had shown you depths of Pandora you never even knew existed and it made you more grateful for his presence in your life.
Not one day went by without him sneaking into your room when he visited to shower you with love. He would do anything just to see your face, even if it was just for a moment. You two grew closer than you had thought was right. Despite the good moments, the doubt you felt never escaped you. Your relationship was obviously dangerous considering Jake was much older than you. However, at his maturity was when your doubt halted. He respected every boundary you had vocally expressed to him and moved completely at your pace.
You wouldn't be shy in saying that your boundaries were certainly strict. But that only lasted until today. Your dad was still asleep as the sun still hurried to rise when you heard the main curtains of your hub shuffle. You were still in bed, appreciating the warm sun on your cheek. The sun shined from the big opening above your bed that worked as a window.
Your head turned when you saw Jake’s big figure walk through the curtains. He removed his bandolier, letting the arrows fall on the floor. His hair was still down from the night before when you used some of your mother’s oil on his hair as hair therapy.
He smiled at you and fell right on top of your body, his arms slowly lowering his torso on top of yours. “Morning, soldier” you chuckled and pressed your lips on his head, giving him tiny kisses.
“you look like an angel in the morning,” he lifted his head up, staring at your face which had started to become red. You pressed his head back into your neck, smelling his coconut-scented hair. This was typical of you two. He would welcome you in the morning in bed, typically before your father woke up, and you would lay there with him, brushing your fingers through his hair.
“What are we doing today?” He asked, his voice muffled.
“My dad will force me to go to the blue petal festival. It’s an annual tradition for us. He wants to take my mom out so he said he needs to get rid of me somehow,” Jake’s body shook as he laughed at your sarcasm.
“Well, lucky you. You’re gonna get more Jake time,” He looked at you and scrunched his nose with a smile. You squished his cheeks together and pouted at his cuteness. “Wanna come with me?”
He raised his eyebrows, “To the festival?”
“Yes dummy,” You said flicking his forehead.
“Are you sure? It isn’t really my setting?”
“Oh wow, is that your excuse for not wanting to hang out with me?” You rolled your eyes at him playfully and pushed him off of you.
“How dare you,” He gasped and tried to reach out for you as you walked towards your wooden wardrobe. You opened the doors and pulled out a white sleeveless tank top with a long blue loincloth to match it.
You placed it in front of your body and smirked at him, “You like it?” His elbow rested on the bed and he stared at you with half-closed eyes, lip between his teeth. “Come here and let me show you how much I like it,” You dropped the outfit on the floor and slowly walked towards him.
He reached out a hand to you and when you grabbed it, he pulled you down on top of him. His arm was secured on your waist as he kissed your face. His lips inched closer to your lips but he avoided them, showing you once again how committed he was to respect you.
You placed each of your arms next to his head on the bed, and you lowered your face to his. His eyes went to your lips and then looked up into your own. “Want me to come to the fest, baby?” he whispered a breathy “hm”.
You breathed on his lips, closing your eyes as you synched your breathing. His hands went down to your lower back, caressing it with his thumbs. You could sense he felt uncertain about whether to make the first move or not so you just initiated it.
“Please, come..” your voice became deeper
You pressed your lips on him, savoring the moment. He moved his lips with yours, slowly and deeply. His hands went on your bum, rubbing it up and down as he found new confidence in being bold with you. His fingers hooked around your shorts, pulling them down to reveal the floral print underwear that he had gifted you.
Underneath, you were clearly wet, the dark, wet patch on your undies making it apparent. Your underwear was creating friction as it was rubbing against his thigh. “you're wet, pretty girl?”
“Jake..” his name rolled off your tongue and with a whiney voice you begged him. He kissed your lips sweetly, sucking them with his so that he can pull you more towards him. When he backed off, he used his finger to pull up a hair strand that had fallen on your nose.
“Your dad should be awake now, don’t want him to catch us, do we bun?” Jake raised his eyebrows and your face relaxed. But it wasn't the calm kind of relaxed. It was the face you made when you were pissed. Your eyebrows and eyes were relaxed and your lips were slightly pushed forward. Jake had spent many days with you to know what you looked like when pissed.
You pushed yourself up from the bed and looked down at him, before walking towards the curtain that separated your bedroom from the kitchen.
“Oh, bunny” he rubbed his nose with his fingers and his head fell back on the bed. Despite you not wanting to admit it, he was right. Your father was in the kitchen, cooking breakfast. His back was turned to you. Jake had already made it out the window in your room and to the front curtain of the hub.
“Your late, partner” Jake had walked through the opening, holding the curtain above his head. Your dad walked towards him, giving him his hand to do their typical handshake. You walked out to the balcony and saw your mother sitting on the swinging wooden bench, a mug in her hand.
“Mama,” you sat next to her and she placed her hand in your hair, pushing it out of the way. “Haven't seen you in a while, my sun” your mother had been stuck in bed as she was carrying your baby brother in her belly. This pregnancy was far more tiring than the last one and you had witnessed it. Helping her stand up from low platforms and making sure when she wakes up at night to empty her bladder, that she is safe.
“How do you feel?”
“Ready to see this fussy boy already,” she said while rubbing her belly. You chuckled and watched her proudly stare at the bump as if your brother was physically here with you.
“Shouldn't you be getting ready for the festival?” she raised her eyebrows
You groaned, “Mama, I don't wanna gooo. It's so boring” She held her belly and laughed at your whining. “Come on, it's not so bad. Get your butt up and go get ready, I'm sure Neïtan will be waiting for you,” she nudged your shoulder.
Neïtan and you had a bit of a difficult relationship to describe. He wasn’t exactly your friend, more so your friend’s friend but regardless he always hung around you. Occasionally, when you were hanging out he would shoot you glances and winks, making it obvious that he was into you.
#jake sully#avatar#jake sully x reader#atwow#atwow neteyam#atwow x you#atwow x reader#fanfic#avatar loak#avatar neteyam#avatar smut#avatar the way of water#jake sully age gap#jake sully x y/n
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my thoughts on spooky month 6
copy pasted from a page and a half of google doc. crying. spoilers inbound.putting it under the cut cuz its super long. also swear warning.
Ok to start off LILA. LILA MY GAL NO UR DOING UR BEST AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA. Im crying im actually fucginf crying. She's trying. So hard. Skid is trying so hard. THEY'RE DOING THEIR BEST PLEASEEEEE. Father Gregor can go EAT SHIT. THEY'RE TRYING AND THAT'S WHAT COUNTS GODDAMNIT.
Susie… Susie no… please… she deserves better istgggggg. What happened to their parents? Are they actually just busy? Are they DEAD? Holy shit what if they're dead. Poor Pump, poor Susie, god please just let these kiddos be ok. PLEASE. ABUELO WONDER IS TYING SO HARD BUT SUSIE KNOWS IT ISN'T REALLY FROM HER PARENTS IM CRYING. SUSIE NOOOOOO
FATHER GREGOR I HATE YOU. ok well he obvs did some good but STILL. GREGOR. STFU GREGOR. I get that hes trying but U CANT JUST SAY ALL THAT SHIT ABOUT JUDGEMENT AND THEN JUDGE HER HER FUCKING HOUSE GOT BROKEN INTO!! YOU DONT HAVE THE FUCKING CONTEXT!!!! ARGHFDGHJSGHJKAGHSD. Also DAMN IS HE A CULTIST NOW?? IS HE DEAD?? WHAT?!?!?!
ROYYYYYY ROY MY BOI NOOOOOO poor guy :( i understand why he hates the kids they DID kinda ruin him so. At least he knows theyre trying now :( and ross n rob just ASSUME he did something bad isnt helping here!!!! I get that theyre also trying to help him and its nice to see him opening up to them about stuff (even if we dont get to know what specifically PELO WHY) but PLEASE get this kid an anger management class or smthn PLEASE. He needs SO MUCH THERAPY. I dont think hes gonna get therapy because im pretty sure his parents are Part Of The Problem but STILL. Also FUCKER LITERALLY GOT POSSESED BY A DEMON?????? THATS GOTTA BE TRAUMATIC TF
Side note i love ross and robert dearly and i appreciate them doing their best to help on both sides i love them smmmmmm AUGH
KEVIN AND RADFORD FRIENDSHIP REALLLLLLLLLL i am SO fucking happy about that!!!! Also Kevin having conflicted feelings on the kids FAIR. Similar thing to Roy except hes an adult with a semi-functional support network and is able to understand that theyre just dumb kids and they dont actually mean any harm. He’s harsher on the hatzgang cuz theyre teens and old enough to know stealing is wrong but Skid n Pump are little kiddos they dont know better. Also him disapproving of father gregor REAL THO. also HE GOT POSSESSED TOO?? TRAUMA CENTRAL HOLY SHIT
PATTY DESERVES TO HAVE A GUN ACTUALLY. Also JOHN ANGST JOHN ANGST JOHN ANGST! IS HIS KID DEAD? IS HIS DAUGHTER OK HOLY SHIT. ALSO THEM HELPING THE KIDS PROPERLY IM CRYIG AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!
WHAT WAS EVERMORE DOING WITH THE HOBOMEN???? HELLO??????
I SAW THAT CULT NECKLACE UNDER IGNACIOS SHIRT. I FUCKING SAW IT. CALLED IT BITCH!!!!!!
Rick just has the WORST luck lmao
STREBER IS ALIVE LETS FUCKING GOOOOOOOOOOOOO
DEXTER NO PLEASE AUGH…… HIS MOM TOO……
JAUNE AND ROSS’S DAD… HE'S REAL HE EXISTS!! I get ur trying jaune but that is NOT the best way to comfort poor lila… AT LEAST SHES TRYING THO I APPRECIATE HER
THE ENTIRE NEWGROUNDS ENDING?? THE THIEVES AND THE CANDY DEALER IN CAHOOTS WITH THE CULT???? HELLO??????
MOLOCH IS GONE. he deserved it but also THE KIDS ARE SO SAD ABOUT IT? Like they don't really get it but they just watched someone they thought was their friend DIE. HOLY SHIT.
finally. SKID AND PUMP. KIDDOS NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
Ok for real tho theyre so much more self aware than the fandom and bulk of the show give them credit for?? Like Skid is VERY aware of his dad being dead/possibly missing and legit just doesn’t wanna talk about it. He knows what death is and he finds fun in it to cope. My poor sweet boyo… and PUMP. PUMP ANSWERING THE CALL AUGHHHHHH HE WANTS HIS PARENTS BACK IM CRYING. SUSIE AND ABUELO ARE DOING THEIR BEST AND HE'S TRYING SO HARD AND AAAAAAAAAAUGH. Also him getting possessed by Moloch while having Star-Eyes basically debunks the theory of the Star-Eyes being a form of possession which is FASCINATING. Anyway that scene with Susie and Pump got me misty eyed and then during the ending with Skid and Lila i actually genuinely started crying. I just want them to be happy. Please let them be happy. Please. PLEASE.
#spookymisc.txt#spooky month#spooky month 6#spooky month 6 spoilers#sm6#sm spoilers#not tagging all the characters cuz theres too many mentioned#anyway CRYING.
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⚣ Therapist BatBro 👓
⚣👓 A/N → Therpist BatBro makes his debut. The second pic is honestly what I feel a therapy session in the Wayne family would look like. This is from another request I got from my previous account.
⚣👓 Summary → Your family isn't pleased with your new hobby or group of friends. But, somehow you've made it a business. Gotta respect the hustle at least.
⚣👓 Words → 2.3k
REBLOGS and replies are greatly appreciated, please! 👓
⚣ ENJOY 👓
The way I see it, you're either a vigilante with the fam and all the villains just seem to like you for some reason and ask where you are during a battle OR you're not a vigilante and you volunteer at Arkham (which would be absolutely insane but it's Arkham so it breaks even) and everyone there is cool with you. Even the Joker (which won't fly well with Jason at all).
We're going to go with the second option for this one.
So, since Bruce was adamant about you not joining the family business as a vigilante since you were the youngest and he had an unyielding urge to protect you and your childhood innocence, you needed to find something to do in your free time.
What better than to volunteer at a crazy house for psychopathic murdering villains?
Of course, considering Arkham was filled mainly with criminals your father had put there along with your siblings, it probably wouldn’t be wise to do that since they’d obviously wouldn’t approve.
SO, you did it anyway and just didn't tell them.
BatBro contemplating...
Duke was the first to find out. Batman had supplies Arkham needed but since he was at work and Duke always took the day shift as everyone liked to joke, who better to drop it off than him? Imagine his surprise when he finds his baby bro in there serving ice cream to Mr. Freeze.
"Here ya go Fries, my man. I sprinkled some ice shavings on there to make it a little tangier for you..." You said handing him the cone.
"Ha ha ha, aren't you hilarious." Victor Fries replied with a genuine smile. As far as The Signal persona knew, he was only capable of smirking or mean-mugging the shit of people, with the exception of an occasional shivering face while mocking someone for how cold they were.
'Oh, they're not gonna believe this...' Duke thought, racing home right after. The way he left the institution, the guards almost thought there was a breakout or a fight going on. Nope, but there might be when he told everyone.
Of course, no one believed him at first, just staring at the dude as if he just said the craziest thing in the world like Bruce being an emotionally available parent.
When you came home that night acting cagey and weirder than normal, they figured something was going on and maybe you were at Arkham but for something completely different than what Duke thought it could be. Because, there would be no way Bruce Wayne’s, aka Batman, own son would ever even consider fraternizing with criminals, let alone his enemies. Right?
So, like any other sane, normal family who responded to distressing situations with maturity and rationality... they spied on you.
Damian, Tim, & Cass followed you the next day. Tim was understandably distraught but also curious how you could have managed to form a friendship with Gotham's criminally insane.
Like...THEY WERE INSANE. But, when he really thought about it, considering the family you came from...yeah, okay. He can see the correlation now.
Damian, however, refused to believe his little brother could be so stupid and dense. How could you form relations with the enemy like that? It was stupidity. Plain idiocy at its finest. It was betrayal!
On the other hand, it was a smart move looking from an assassin's point of view. You know the whole keep your friends close and enemies closer deal, but that was his thing. Not yours! So you'd be getting extra noogies and brotherly beatdowns when you got home. In the name of camaraderie and righting your careless decisions.
Cass thought it was fucking hilarious.
Upon their arrival and finding you trading riddle jokes with Riddler, their jaws all collectively dropped to the floor.
"Okay, okay okay..." You breathed, calming down from your wheezing laughter. "Riddle me this...I'm neither a man nor a woman but don't hurt my wittle feelings cause I'm still a person. I'll kick you and scream at you, even both during a tantrum. My ego's bigger than my head but shorter than my height, who am I?"
Riddler took a moment to think about it before the metaphorical lightbulb appeared above his head, "Boy Wonder!" He pointed.
"Which one?" You immediately responded.
"The fourth one!"
"Yes!"
Tim and Cass both had to think about it before they realized the clues in the riddle. They're eyes went wide when they realized who you were talking about, and turned to see Damian who looked ready to tear your head off with his teeth.
"He's in for it when he gets home..." He growled through his grinding teeth.
Damian pissed (Left) | Tim & Cass (Right)
Everyone was mildly concerned when they came home that night and asked them how everything went only for Damian's immediate response to be that he was going to get his revenge sketchbook.
Why Damian has a revenge sketchbook, no one knows. But, everyone was just the right amount unsettled by it.
That night at dinner there was a bit of a tense air as Damian had to be placed between both Bruce and Jason to keep him from lunging at you with his salad fork. Usually, you were used to Damian’s somewhat murderous tantrums, but this was on another level.
He almost looked like he would grow horns out of his head at any moment, which would actually be somewhat fitting. Considering he was the grandson of the Demon and all.
You also noticed how Tim and Cass kept weirdly staring at you. Neither of them said something, which was odd(well except maybe for Cass), but you just ignored it and ate your dinner.
That night, you put some of your old booby traps from when you first moved into the manor back into place. You needed some sort of reassurance and protection to help you sleep. At many points throughout the night, you shot out of bed and grabbed one of the many random weapons you had hidden around you when you thought you heard someone trying to sneak into your room.
Damian definitely tried but had learned his lesson after the last time he got caught in one of your traps. You took a lot of inspiration from movies like Home Alone and The Parent Trap.
The next day, Dick and Steph went to check out the mental institution insane asylum.
Steph also thought it was funny like Cass but in a more ironic type of way. She’d rooted for you to get your own vigilante identity and join the family business. So this was like the ultimate petty revenge and she was here for it.
But Dick just couldn't imagine you in a place like this. His sweet adorable baby brother, in this horrid mess? He was calling it, either blackmail or manipulation. A rude awakening was awaiting him around the corner.
They looked to see you in the middle of practicing a handshake with Bane.
"No Bane, fist bump, then the arm wiggle..." You said, showing him the move for the 4th time.
"Oh sorry buddy," He replied.
"No problem man, let's try again."
They watched you go through the whole routine, Steph taking a video on her phone while Dick looked in surprise and jealousy. How come you and him didn't have a handshake like that? Every little brother should want to have a cool handshake with their cool big brother! Was he not good enough?!
Steph laughing in petty (Left) | Dick breaking down (Right)
When Dick stormed into the manor later muttering about showing you a real handshake, Bruce only raised an eyebrow when Steph walked in looking thoroughly entertained like she just watched the funniest show of her life. It certainly felt like it.
That afternoon, Dick gave you the cold shoulder all day. He even canceled your weekly brother movie night, which shocked everyone, especially your dad. What could have been so bad that would cause Bruce’s first protege to treat his kid brother like this? The same kid who he’d absolutely lose it if they went to anyone other than him for advice or would pout if he didn’t get the first hug from him when in a room full of people.
Of course, he still cracked when you gave him the hurt puppy dog eyes (a trick you learned from Jason that he used to use on Bruce all the time when he was younger). Dick caved and you guys ended up watching a movie, though you were mildly concerned whenever your oldest brother paused the movie and took the time to highlight the friendship and connection between two characters, especially if they were siblings.
Something like a special code, an inside joke, or even maybe a HANDSHAKE. What does it say about a big brother if his little brother doesn’t want to have a cool special handshake with him?!
Subtle.
You just nodded along, making a mental note to avoid any family-oriented films for your next movie night.
But, after this incident, you’d fully managed to get Bruce’s attention. He knew that Dick out of all his children was usually the least likely to get irate over something that wasn’t serious. So the fact that he did, despite how unserious it may have seemed, but it was settled.
Something was going on and your dad, no…Batman was going to get to the bottom of it.
Jason decided to come along with your father, fully prepared to drag you out of the building by force if he had to. He even went as far as calling your boyfriend Conner Kent, aka Superboy, who he and Bruce had a love/hate relationship with because they couldn't really threaten the boy like they wanted to if he hurt you.
Well, Jason couldn’t at least.
Bruce had more than enough kryptonite in multiple storages across his warehouse and had no problem showing it to the half-Kryptonian as a warning.
Conner was more than a little peeved, try fucking pissed when he heard you'd been hanging out with supervillains. And he as well was ready to sling you over his shoulder if he had to. But, probably not in front of your dad who kept throwing pointed glares his way as they moved through the building.
When Batman showed up demanding to see where the volunteer by your name was, they quickly rushed to show him to your location. He couldn't fathom this. The mere thought that his youngest child, his sweet, innocent (on a good day) good-natured son, would be hanging around all his enemies, laughing with them like they were good ol pals?
He'd sooner believe Joker was going to therapy.
The shock of his lifetime was also waiting for him around the corner.
They came around to see you through a window sitting in an office room in business casual attire, holding a clipboard and writing down notes while Joker was laying on a couch with his cuffed hands resting on his chest, venting out his emotions.
"And sometimes, I do feel like I go a bit far. But, I can't take all the blame. I mean, everyone paints me as the villain, but Batsy plays into our little game just as much as I do. Why does he get painted as the hero and me as a crazy clown? Well, you know, besides the clown face, HAHAHA!" He vented, ending with his usual eerie cackle.
"Uh-huh, and how does that make you feel?" You asked while scribbling a few notes on your legal pad and adjusting the fake glasses on your face before turning around at the sound of the door opening.
You felt your heart drop in your stomach when you saw your father, brother, and boyfriend all staring at you with very unhappy looks.
"BATSY! Oh, do come in! We were just talking about you. I think it's about time you and I got some relationship counseling." Joker exclaimed.
Not one word was said while Conner grabbed you by your wrists, (gently of course because he's caring like that) and dragged you out of the room, Jason not too far behind, ready to tear you a new one. Batman held his shoulder, while Joker just watched in amusement, "Guess my hour's up."
You, Bruce, and Jason arguing (Left) | Joker enjoying the show (Right)
You were immediately brought home after getting an earful from Jason to which you offered him his own free session.
He agreed.
Bruce demands to know why you would even consider going there, socializing with those people.
"Well, seeing as how I can't join the family business, I figured I could do some good in some way. And villains or not, they've got good in them! Just you know, when they're not trying to murder people." You answered.
You were interrupted by your other siblings appearing before you felt an arm forcibly turn you around which Conner raised an annoyed eyebrow at, but he kept his mouth shut.
"What does Bane have that I don't? Am I not good enough as an older brother to have a handshake with?"
You sighed, "Is that why you were so upset the other day?! Ugh, would you like to create a special handshake with me, Dick?"
" Yes! Super secret too! You can't have any handshakes with anybody else!" He hugged you while you patted his back.
Brothers could be so needy sometimes.
You could see your boyfriend eyeing you both with the strangest look. In your defense, he had plenty of warning of how weird your family was.
Before things could calm down too much though, everyone heard a shrill voice screaming your name from the top of the staircase.
"Y/N!"
"Fuck..." You muttered under your breath, before turning to see Tim and Cass giving you nervous looks.
“You were there with Riddler, weren’t you?”
They could barely look you in the eye as you turned to see Damian standing on the banister, holding one of your slippers in his hand.
"Who's short now?!"
Alfred went to get the first aid kit.
Damian with your slipper...
BONUS:
☀️ | Bat Family | ☀️
☀️ | Masterlists | ☀️
#solar-wing ☀️#☀️🪽.fanfic#☀️🪽.dcposts#☀️🪽.hcs#☀️🪽.request#☀️🪽.txt#dc#dcu#dcau#dc universe#dc imagine#dc x reader#dc x male reader#x reader#x male reader#batfam x reader#batfam x male reader#bat family#batfam#batfamily#bruce wayne#dick grayson#jason todd#tim drake#damian wayne#stephanie brown#cassandra cain#duke thomas#conner kent#conner kent x male reader
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Save me, save the spider
Summary: Bucky saves you from a spider in the bathroom. He helps you see how cute the spider really is while messing with Steve.
Pairing: Bucky x Avenger!Reader
Warnings: A cute spider, mentions of Exposure Therapy
Words: Just over 1000 words
A/N: I know some people might not like this fic due to the spider being saved. I'm not saying it's wrong to kill a spider, just that sometimes it can be avoided if you have someone that can help you 🥰
Masterlist
Steve was the first person to hear you screaming. Running into your bathroom, his eyebrows shoot up, eyes widening at the sight of you dripping wet, hiding behind the shower door. Your eyes were locked on the bathroom floor, not blinking as you stared at the huge spider blocking your path.
"Steve! Thank goodness you're here! Friday called Bucky but he's still on his way up from the ground floor! Please, you need to take care of it!" Your voice seemed to increase incrementally with every word you said.
"Uh, yeah. Sure, I'll grab a shoe quickly."
"What, are you crazy?"
He watched the spider for a second. "Yeah, you're right. I probably need a boot or something for that huge spider."
"Steve, no! You idiot! What did this innocent spider do to you?" You glared at him. "Just, um, just toss Bucky's shirt to me and then go find him!" Steve watched you for a second before he grabbed the shirt on the counter and tossed it to you. Catching the shirt with one hand, you hid behind the shower door to avoid flashing him. "I'll watch the spider. Just go!" Steve hesitated before seeing the look in your eyes. You stubbornly watched the spider, not moving a muscle. He quickly departed in search of his best friend.
He found Bucky at the stairs door, barely out of breath as he ran the last few steps to your floor. "Bucky, I don't know what's wrong with her. She told me to take care of the spider but then got all crazy, and I don't know why."
Bucky was smiling softly as he ran to your suite. "Let me guess, you wanted to kill it? That's when the crazy started?"
"Well, yeah. She's obviously terrified of the spider but the moment I wanted to kill it, she sent me to find you. I seriously don't understand your woman."
Bucky couldn't stop from chuckling. "Watch and learn, Steve. She's scared of spiders, and as an Avenger, she decided she wanted to get over her fear. She's doing some Exposure Therapy to help her overcome it."
Bucky entered the bathroom first, Steve hot on his trail.
"Bucky! Thank goodness you're here!" He could hear the relief in your voice. "There, in the corner, do you see it?" You pointed to the dark spot, eyes wide open in alertness.
"I got it," Bucky said as he crouched down and looked at the spider. Moving carefully, he slowly scooped it up in his vibranium hand, taking care to avoid hurting its thin legs. He quickly covered the spider with his right hand, keeping it from escaping.
"It's not poisonous or venomous?" You asked as you finally slipped on Bucky's shirt and slowly exited the shower before putting on your robe for added protection.
"No, baby. It's just a big Wolf Spider. It's probably a female judging by her size. You coming with me to take her out?"
Your gaze met his as he waited for your answer. You slowly nodded, eyes dropping to his hands. Thank goodness he had big hands, otherwise, there was no chance the spider would have fit. "It's ok, baby. I got it. I won't let it hurt you."
You trusted Bucky with your life. His reflexes were so fast, there was no way the spider could get to you.
Steve watched from the corner of the room, his eyebrows raised as he watched the scene in front of him. Bucky slowly exited the bathroom with you following his lead. Steve couldn't help but follow too, needing to know how all this would end.
You pushed the button for the elevator, happy when it opened within seconds. The three of you went down to the back garden, the trees and plants looking beautiful in the early morning light.
Bucky walked to one of the big trees surrounded by small flowering plants and crouched down. After a second, you join him. "I think this is a good place. You want to see her?" When you hesitated, Bucky started to withdraw his clasped hands but you stopped him. Taking a deep breath, you steeled your nerves.
"Ok. You'll stop her if she comes for me right?" You knew the answer but you needed reassurance.
"Of course, baby. Do you remember what we spoke about? The spider is just looking for some bugs to eat. She just wants food. She doesn't want to hurt you, right?"
"Right. I trust you, Bucky." You loved how gentle he was with you, how much he cared.
Bucky slowly lifted his right arm, the spider lying still enough for you to get a quick look. The first thing you saw was all the long legs, seeming quite delicate up close. The spider had two big eyes, with small eyes above and beneath them with fangs underneath. Up close, she almost seemed... adorable.
"See, it's actually cute, right? As long as she stays still like this," Bucky whispered, making you smile in agreement. "Let me put this big girl down while she's still peaceful."
You and Steve watched as Bucky moved his hand to the tree and set it down for the spider to climb off. The spider hesitated before stretching its long legs and then scurrying to the tree, away from the three of you.
"My hero!" You giggled as you rose on your toes and kissed Bucky. "You're so sweet, Bucky. You should educate your best friend over there," you said, pointing to Steve. "Remind him we don't always have to kill what is misunderstood."
"Misunderstood? That spider's so big I'm surprised Tony hasn't asked it to start paying rent!" Steve exclaimed. "It's not my fault that you're a freak, Y/N. Any normal woman would have wanted me to kill it!"
"Good thing I love my freaky woman," Bucky smirked, happy to have found you after a lifetime of war.
"So much for having a heart of gold, huh, Steve?" You couldn't help but tease him. "My Sergeant would never hurt an innocent spider like that!" Bucky beamed at your adoration, pulling you into his side and nuzzling your neck.
"You're right, baby. Steve's the bad boy today," Bucky smirked at Steve. "I'll have to teach the idiot some manners. Can't have Captain America running around killing things. Imagine what the public would say." Bucky escorted you back inside the building, Steve reluctantly following.
"Yeah, well, imagine what the public would say if they could see you now, Buck. The terrifying Winter Soldier saving a spider instead of killing it," Steve replied.
"Anything for my best girl."
Tag List:
@crazyunsexycool
@fluffysucker
@morganmofresh
@dottirose
@cjand10
@buggy14
@tripleoyaa
@mandijo17
@moviegurl2002
#bucky x reader#bucky x y/n#james bucky buchanan barnes#bucky fanfic#bucky barns x reader#bucky fluff#steve rogers#bucky imagine#bucky x you#bucky x female reader
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A/N | These are kind all over the place lmao Just some headcanons of younger ASL with a Tired Older Brother that probably needs some therapy lmao (Maybe some reactions of Straw Hats / Whitebeard Crew of finding out they have another brother and meeting) (GIF found on Pinterest)
Pronouns used | Reader is male so He/Him but its in 2nd perspective so You/Your
Pairings used | Platonic ASL x Reader, Platonic Straw Hat x Reader, Platonic Whitebeard Pirates x Reader, Slight Thatch x Reader
ᴀɴᴏᴛʜᴇʀ ᴏɴᴇ?!
ฅ^•ﻌ•^ฅ You were the first kid Garp gave to Dadan, you were around 4 when he dropped you off on the mountain and just left
ฅ^•ﻌ•^ฅ Dandan found out quickly that you were low on energy, which she was happy about, so you weren't much trouble
ฅ^•ﻌ•^ฅ However she was worried as she has never seen you sleep, even though you keep reassuring her that you do indeed sleep (Er somewhat)
ฅ^•ﻌ•^ฅ Now when Ace was introduced to you, he instantly loved you
ฅ^•ﻌ•^ฅ You don't know why and you don't honestly care but he seemed to cling to you, follow you around, and try to prove himself to you
ฅ^•ﻌ•^ฅ He would drag you out into the forest and 'teach' you how to hunt the animals there (When in reality you already knew how to but let him do his thing)
ฅ^•ﻌ•^ฅ However as he got older he started going out on his own and leaving you be, seeing how much more tired you became (Ofc he still drags you out everyone in a while)
ฅ^•ﻌ•^ฅ Once he met Sabo, he instantly (like 2 weeks after meeting) brought him home to introduce him to you - he wants his new best friend to meet his cool older brother (Even though he never admits either)
ฅ^•ﻌ•^ฅ When Sabo met you, he understand why Ace talked so highly about you over the last two weeks
ฅ^•ﻌ•^ฅ He could tell you were strong, he could tell you would do anything for your family no matter how much energy it took
ฅ^•ﻌ•^ฅ Like Ace, he stuck to you, followed you around, and tried to prove himself to you (Not as much as Ace but still)
ฅ^•ﻌ•^ฅ They looked like Ducklings to you, A Mother Duck and her Ducklings (You had to admit it was very cute)
ฅ^•ﻌ•^ฅ When you went to the village, them trying -and failing- to follow you secretly, wanting to see what you do throughout the day they're in the forest
ฅ^•ﻌ•^ฅ They will ask for cuddles, discretely, but still
ฅ^•ﻌ•^ฅ Like that one time you were laying in your bed eyes closed trying to sleep when your bedroom door opened and in came a whispering Ace and Sabo, they then snuck into your bed -not very quietly- and cuddled up to you and fell asleep
ฅ^•ﻌ•^ฅ And if you said anything about and I mean anything, Ace wouldn't join in these 'Nap Cuddles' for a while (Sabo on the other hand wouldn't care, an embarrassed blush at being caught but still join you)
ฅ^•ﻌ•^ฅ When Luffy was introduced to you, he was just like the other two, although he doesn't find the need to prove himself to you
ฅ^•ﻌ•^ฅ He did sit at the table with you just talking and asking questions for a bit before Ace returned
"So there's another boy living here?"
"Mhm..he's out right now"
"Is there any food here? I'm hungry"
"...Dinner will be served soon I think"
ฅ^•ﻌ•^ฅ Most of his questions are about food and the 'boy that lives here' but mostly about food
ฅ^•ﻌ•^ฅ Now when Ace returned with a Hippo, he was jealous mad to see another boy in the house
ฅ^•ﻌ•^ฅ He sat right next to you, a glare on his face as he stared at Luffy
ฅ^•ﻌ•^ฅ Dinner was fucking crazy
ฅ^•ﻌ•^ฅ That's all you're going to get about dinner labuogr-
ฅ^•ﻌ•^ฅ It really annoyed you how rude Ace was to Luffy, but you didn't say shit. It would pass over eventually (Plus Luffy was persistent to be friends)
ฅ^•ﻌ•^ฅ Let's skip to the others finding out cause I'm getting lazy lmao
ฅ^•ﻌ•^ฅ Let's say Luffy mentioned you right after Alabasta "Oooo! I wonder what Aniki is doing!" Well it was more like he was talking to himself and the crew overheard
ฅ^•ﻌ•^ฅ At first they thought it was about Ace, but Luffy never called Ace 'Aniki'
ฅ^•ﻌ•^ฅ After a few more overheard mentions of this 'Aniki', Nami finally asked who it was
ฅ^•ﻌ•^ฅ And the crew was shook
"ANOTHER BROTHER?!?!"
ฅ^•ﻌ•^ฅ While Luffy just laughed with a cheeky smile on his face like he did something (which he kinda did lol)
ฅ^•ﻌ•^ฅ Chopper was asking questions and Luffy answered with excitement, he loved telling stories about his childhood, especially all the different things you taught him
"And this one-time Y/n kidnapped me from my bed in the middle of the night and left me out in the forest for a whole 3 days telling me that I needed to learn how to survive on my own! It was soooo fun!"
ฅ^•ﻌ•^ฅ The crew was shocked, to say the least (again) that you did something like that (in reality you just needed a break from the boy)
ฅ^•ﻌ•^ฅ They started to think you were this mean, angry monster from all the stories Luffy told lmao
ฅ^•ﻌ•^ฅ When they met you, however, they were shocked once more as you look done with life and just wanted to sleep
ฅ^•ﻌ•^ฅ Luffy was overjoyed that they found you sailing the ocean in a small boat (Usopp, Chopper, and Nami were shocked that you were even alive as you used a small simple boat, like how?)
ฅ^•ﻌ•^ฅ They found your tiredness and blunt words hilarious, as you poked and argued playfully and calmly with Luffy
ฅ^•ﻌ•^ฅ They saw the similarity between you and Ace tho, you said some similar things he did (they conclude that you were the one that raised him)
ฅ^•ﻌ•^ฅ Plus Luffy followed you around like a duck when you where aboard
ฅ^•ﻌ•^ฅ He even shared some of his food which the crew didn't know was possible
"He always shared his food with me when we were younger! Plus he doesn't eat enough!"
ฅ^•ﻌ•^ฅ Proceeds to shove food down your throat
ฅ^•ﻌ•^ฅ When you had to leave he wouldn't let go of your leg, he just whined and whined saying you shouldn't go and should join his crew
ฅ^•ﻌ•^ฅ It took almost all of the crew to get him off lmao
ฅ^•ﻌ•^ฅ Now let's go onto Ace and the Whitebeard Pirates (Aka my favorites ghruw-)
ฅ^•ﻌ•^ฅ They knew right away-well when the bounties came in and Ace saw Luffy's and Yours
"LOOK ITS MY BROTHERS! IMOUTO AND ANIKI!"
ฅ^•ﻌ•^ฅ He was shoving the papers into Whitebeard's Face, into Marco's Face, and into Thatch's Face (Everyone wasn't excluded to having a paper shoved in his face however those three got it the most lmao)
ฅ^•ﻌ•^ฅ Whitebeard just laughed, as he's actually met you before but didn't say anything to Ace about it
ฅ^•ﻌ•^ฅ Marco was with Whitebeard at the time too but never actually meet you, you know? He saw a glimpse of you as you talked with Pops but never approached you
ฅ^•ﻌ•^ฅ He was kinda excited to be able to see the face of the man Pops was talking to a couple years back but it didn't show on his face at all
ฅ^•ﻌ•^ฅ When they found you sailing the Grandline in a tiny boat they were just staring with wide-eyed and mouths touching the floor
ฅ^•ﻌ•^ฅ Ace excitedly welcomed you aboard, rambling on and on about what happened over the past couple of years and yadda yadda
ฅ^•ﻌ•^ฅ Pops had a small smile on his face as he watched you interact with his sons
"It is good to see you again Y/n"
"You too Pops"
ฅ^•ﻌ•^ฅ Ace kinda just stared between you and Whitebeard before connecting the dots
"YOU ALREADY KNOW EACHOTHER?!?"
ฅ^•ﻌ•^ฅ His reaction was funny lmao he was yelling incoherent words and shit as he freaked out
ฅ^•ﻌ•^ฅ Marco simply pushed past him (Almost knocking him over) and introduced himself to you
"I'm Marco, 1st Division Commander"
"Ohhhh you're the Bird Boy Pops was talking about"
ฅ^•ﻌ•^ฅ He kinda stiffened up as 'Bird Boy' left your mouth, Ace snickering behind him with a hand covering his mouth
ฅ^•ﻌ•^ฅ There was a big party that night with alcohol and cake and everything you could think of
ฅ^•ﻌ•^ฅ Thatch was proud to hear that you loved his food and was even blushing when you asked to talk some with you when you left
ฅ^•ﻌ•^ฅ Like yes he's been complimented before but damn you look good, your tired and sleepy voice just flustered him
ฅ^•ﻌ•^ฅ Thatch may or may not have gained a teeny weeny crush on you (Which Marco teases him about)
ฅ^•ﻌ•^ฅ And the nickname 'Baker Boy' hm hm HM he's a puddle on the floor
ฅ^•ﻌ•^ฅ Ace would also notice a couple hours into the party and become protective over you, glaring at Thatch every time he got 'too close'
ฅ^•ﻌ•^ฅ It was hilarious to watch, like a Chihuahua trying to keep 'the danger' away from its owner
ฅ^•ﻌ•^ฅ You could tell Thatch was catching the case of 'Love sick Puppy' but didn't do anything about it besides the little teases (You found his reactions adorable)
ฅ^•ﻌ•^ฅ Once you have to leave, Ace and Whitebeard are asking you to join the crew
ฅ^•ﻌ•^ฅ Ace was specifically persistent on keeping you here, seeing as he didn't want you to leave and he wanted to protect you from the other love interests or 'Dangers' in his words
ฅ^•ﻌ•^ฅ However you simply shook your head, took the bag of sweets Thatch had prepared for you, and left
ฅ^•ﻌ•^ฅ Now when you ran into Sabo -let's say he was on a mission or something- he didn't remember you
ฅ^•ﻌ•^ฅ It took a few minutes for you to figure this out and he wasn't just joking around
ฅ^•ﻌ•^ฅ It broke your heart, it did but you just brushed him off, saying you thought he was someone else, which he understood somewhat
ฅ^•ﻌ•^ฅ However when you met again and he did remember you, he felt absolutely horrible for forgetting (He also remembered the time you approached him and he didn't remember you, he remembered your eyes and how hurt you looked)
ฅ^•ﻌ•^ฅ He instantly asked Dragon if he could go searching for you, he wanted to apologize and hug you (He really missed your soft, tired hugs)
ฅ^•ﻌ•^ฅ After begging and pleading, he finally was able to leave for a week but that's it and he left right away, only packing a few necessities
ฅ^•ﻌ•^ฅ After about 5 days, he finally found you on an island with a small village (He wasn't paying attention to what the island was called)
ฅ^•ﻌ•^ฅ Once he spotted you he fucking bolted towards you tears streaming down his face
"I'm so fucking sorry I'm so sorry I can't believe I-"
ฅ^•ﻌ•^ฅ He wouldn't stop apologizing and clinging to you and it surprised you, seeing as you didn't expect it
ฅ^•ﻌ•^ฅ You guys spent the next 2 days talking, catching up, and you comforting Sabo
ฅ^•ﻌ•^ฅ He clung to you throughout the two days, whether it be on your arm or waist (Platonic Cuddles at the hotel room you had)
ฅ^•ﻌ•^ฅ It was an emotional meeting and emotional hang out for the next 2 days
ฅ^•ﻌ•^ฅ But you two did go shopping right before he had to go back
ฅ^•ﻌ•^ฅ Here is one story about you and child ASL
ฅ^•ﻌ•^ฅ There was this one time Ace and Luffy dragged you out into the forest at the ass crack of dawn just to show you the tree house and flag they made
ฅ^•ﻌ•^ฅ When you saw it a smile was instantly on your face as you spotted a small sideways Z in the background of the flag, it looked more like a zigzag than anything but Luffy had excitedly explained it to you
"You're gonna be the First Mate of this Crew! And I'm gonna be the Captain!" -Luffy
"Nu huh! I'm gonna be the Captian!" -Ace
ฅ^•ﻌ•^ฅ It went back and forth for the next few hours and it got so annoying for you that you took Sabo and quietly left the treehouse to just walk around the quiet forest
ฅ^•ﻌ•^ฅ When they noticed you and Sabo were gone they instantly rushed out of the treehouse and into the forest, yelling for you lmao
ฅ^•ﻌ•^ฅ And that's all I'm going to do I'm tired-
#luffy x reader#monkey d luffy x reader#monkey d luffy x you#ace x you#ace x reader#portgas d ace x reader#portgas d ace x you#portgas d ace x y/n#sabo x you#sabo x reader#sabo x y/n#sabo one piece#luffy one piece#ace one piece#luffy op#one piece x reader#one piece#one piece headcanons#one piece strawhats#x reader platonic#one piece x male reader#straw hats x reader#x male reader#male reader#male reader insert#x reader#one piece scenario#straw hat pirates#one piece whitebeard#op whitebeard
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E👏P👏I👏S👏O👏D👏E SEVENNNN
We just started off with percy walking his way into crusty’s place like woah hold there buddy we’re starting quickly
the set is so pretty and colourful why couldnt everything else be like them ahem ahem waterland cough cough
Why do they know everything already 😭they’re really taking out the middle school cluelessness out of everyone in this show and its making me mad sometimes
What do you MEAN he casually has an entrance to the underworld?
walker’s acting was rlly good in this ep btw
The whole bed scene was so anticlimactic and quick STOP
”youre lucky we let you keep your head on” YEAH WELL SO IS DISNEY
grover just walking in like is it over now?? DISNEY I BEG OF YOU LET GROVER DO SOMETHING
grover’s squeaky ball to calm himself down😭 🥺
Sally and percy angst was not on my bingo card but here we are
WHEN YOU HAVE NO CHOICE BUT TO KEEP HURTING EACH OTHER 😭😭
That transition was neat
wow what a well lit underworld dayum
its confirmed percy and annabeth watched that movie
“Only suckers wait in line” savage
rip ‘we drowned in a bathtub’ hello ‘everyone is dying to some extent’
i dont know if its just me but i feel like the jokes and the humour of the show was more aligned to its pjo adult fans, rather than the books, which rick included middle school humor because that was what the initial audience was. I mean removing the fun of the lotus casino and replacing it with a scene of percy driving a car (which is an activity adults do) and the dying on the inside is something only adults in their quarter life crisis complain about
Idk it doesnt feel like annabeth is scratching cerberus because she genuinely likes dogs, it feels like more of a strategical move which i am not the happiest about BECAUSE I WANT SOFT ANNABETH
squeak squeak
PERCY PULLING ANNABETH UP FROM A CLIFF
”excuse me” i love how professional she is
i read so many fanfics and theories on how the fourth pearl would go missing?? And grover lost it??? Thats it???
I hate that principal why are you taking something a 10 year old said and say he needs ‘psychological monitoring’?? Hon he drew a horsie with wings that he claimed he saw, he doesnt need to go to a psych ward or therapy or something
but imagine percy hearing this in the other room🥺
I feel like all of them have a reason to get rooted and stuff in asphodel but its apparently only annabeth so
not grover seeing two of his friends turning into trees🥺
Idk grover’s not that emotional at all about anything?? Hes supposed to be scared and on the verge of tears 24/7? Not aryans fault just the writers
ANNABETH STRESSING ON THE FACT THAT THEY NEED TO SAVE PERCYS MOM TOO 🥹
Percy rlly just said “periodt💅”
They really copy pasted hades from the musical why is no one talking about that?
walker’s acting>>>>>
why are you trying so hard to get rid of me 🥺
THE WHOLE SALLY AND POSEIDON SCENE 😭 NO SALLY U ARE NOT FAILING
I love the fact that percy’s still chilling there
I WAS ACTUALLY EXPECTING POSEIDON TO GO ACT AS A WAITER TO TALK TO PERCY LOLL
what do you mean they have to find the helm too???
why no one help grover up??
poseidons speech as percy gets up and looks at ares is peak cinema
#General thoughts: its not as cramped as i thought it would be thankfully#But still there was so much going on#percy jackson#rick riordan#pjo fandom#annabeth chase#percabeth#pjo#heroes of olympus#pjo tv show#pjo tv series#percy jackon and the olympians#percy and grover#percy pjo#percy series#percy and annabeth#annabeth#grover
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Transfem auntie buggy ideas again bc AAAA BRANROT I LOVE WOMEN-
Ya know,,,,, how Oda said,,,,,, Buggy COULD be really fucking powerful if there was effort put in? What if in transfem Buggy world, the effort was due to dysphoria-fueled depression and anxiety. Coming out ((and having such blatant and unrepentant support, from her lovers AND the Guild in its entirety)) leads to her actually... feel okay-ish. It's not a sudden in-all-fix-it ((she needs a PLETHORA of therapies)), but it starts her on a good path. Thay first step was difficult, but it was made... so much easier. Which leads to the second step. The third. The fourth.
And now that Buggy isn't having seventy four panic attacks every three minutes, she can devote some Brain Space to other things - her weapon making has become a sort of fidget toy type of situation, and she's.. actually really gotten a knack for this, over the years. She'd never call herself prodigal ((lowkey even if she is, with chemistry, physics and spatial awareness, she's so deep in the I'm A Liar hole that she doesn't clock that just.... Getting It isn't normal)).
Croc and Hawk are very supportive, even if they bully her (consensually).
And eventually, they even deign to try teaching her Haki - just to realize she's... been using it constantly almost her whole life. Her Observation is innate, acute, and one of the reasons she's so charismatic and able to reign in a crowd. It's both a talent for manipulation and also a form of reactive observation haki - by shifting her own energy among her followers, prospective or otherwise, she can encourage a specific reaction. It's a mix of Skill, Natural Talent and smoke and mirrors.
Learning that makes her wonder - if Haki can be so dynamic and THEN SOME, what other places has she not considered such an approach? Her weapons? Training? Her... her devil fruit...?
It's a paramecia. It affects her body, and she's gotten some rather decent control of it. Do paramecias awaken like zoans? Do logias? New Fixation Hours. She goes a little feral with the possibilities.
Suddenly, it seems like all of these little walls she never noticed before have fallen away, leaving a vast horizon of possibility.
Shanks will take a bit to arrive at Karai Bari, and he's expecting a specific version of his former best friend (or former love or former sibling, depending on Preferred Shuggy Flavor). He is anticipating the Buggy he saw a few years ago, but this time Woman Mode.
Crocodile and Mihawk's protective hovering is not exactly smth he anticipated, but he's willing to roll with that! His lovely Bug is just so pretty, he HAS to tell her, see her for himself, it's not even a want, it's not a desire, he needs it the way hee needs sea salt in his hair and a hilt in his hand and air in his lungs.
Buggy, meanwhile has skipped right tf over many emotions, instead Fueled By Hyperfixation, and while part of her is absolutely REELING at Shanks showing up unannounced on HER island, another part is cackling in mad scientist and saying "convince him to guinea pig, 'for old time's sake'." Shanks is WEAK to Buggy Begging Eyes, and Croc and Hawk ((while also weak but not exactly as weak as Shanks, they can pretend)) are watching and honestly laughing internally bc....
Well. Buggy's on a ROLL. And Shanks is her newest toy.
Poor Redhair has NO IDEA what he's in for...
SHE'S A QUEEN SHE'S A PRINCESS SHE'S LITERALLY LIVING IN MY HEAD RENT FREE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! This is actually canon to me. Okay. Okay? She was just insecure and dealing with dysphoria and now she's the queen of the world. She owns it. Shanks is such a simp he's gonna let her do anything lmfao. And Mihawk and Crocodile absolutely love her and it's even funnier to bully her this way. And she's,,, She's so powerful. Queen. Absolutely amazing. Sexy but also really cute. Prettiest clown you've ever seen. HAVE YOU THOUGHT ABOUT HER CLOTHES??? Because I have so many outfits in mind I am going INSANE. And I can't stop thinking about Luffy and her getting along and Luffy being extremely happy (not to mention Sanji, Don't- Don't let Sanji see her because maybe he dies. Me too).
#I LOVE WOMEN TOO ANON#<- a very normal lesbian obsessed a normal amount with fem buggy#one piece#buggy the clown#fem buggy#transfem buggy#cross guild#red haired shanks
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What are the salient features of Asriel, post-canon, that keep us from "saving" him from life alone in the Underground?
He's soulless (a practical problem),
he'll soon return to being a flower (a practical problem) and would prefer that you think of him like this rather than Flowey (a personal and interpersonal problem), and
he's decided to stay and tend the grave of the fallen child (and this is not really a problem at all; rather, a decision, which the boundary conditions of Undertale require us to respect).
There is a lot of UT post-canon fic out there which treats all these as practical problems. Frisk can just get a soul from somewhere, throw Alphys technobabble or soul arcanobabble at the body issue; get Flowey in therapy; and... also get Flowey in therapy for that last one, because his decision isn't really legitimate, in save-the-goat stories. It's self-harm. Which, personally, is both understandable and missing the point of one of the game's core themes: no matter how many times you restart the story, there are things you can't do; you are not getting a 100% Complete Perfect Pacifist where even Asriel is saved, and it's okay to be wistful about it, but you still need to put down the controller eventually. Getting him to the surface happens a lot in fic, because we all want the goldenest ending, but it could never happen in canon and we just have to live with it. It's thematically potent and I'd lose a lot of respect for Undertale's commitment to its story if you could circumvent it.
(Incidentally, this feels to me like it stems from the same ideas as making "* I have places to be" the wrong answer, a giving-in to Frisk's self-sacrificing, self-disregarding nature which must be corrected. Sometimes, you have to let people live and make their own decisions, outside the boundaries of the story's frame. Your perspective only goes so far.)
...now, fluffier, more sympathetically-traumatized Asriel, on the other hand...!
Ralsei's woes in Deltarune are very visibly the same kind of isolation as what Asriel's dealing with at the end of Undertale, but a) it's worse (a whole lifetime of waiting in a very deliberately empty, lifeless, three-screen-long kingdom) and b) he's stuck there for purely practical reasons. Darkners can't enter the Light World without becoming objects. He never made a decision to be here.
It's not something we can technobabble our way out of right now, but we're only in Chapter 2, right? We can save him, in a way we can't save Asriel: the deadlock we can't resolve has been removed; we don't really have to think about his preferences any more, because the preferences that kept us from helping him and left him stuck in the Underground I mean Dark World are just gone.
His issues are also much more obvious from the get-go, and seem designed to be something we talk him out of – not Asriel's decision to stay by his lost friend's grave, with a weight of meaning and feeling behind it, but hero worship, subservience, religious dedication to the Prophecy and self-image issues, all clear and visible dysfunctions. Giving Asriel therapy has left the realm of fanfiction and wish fulfillment and become part of canon... and the real disagreements we had with UT!Asriel over what he was and meant and deserved have become simple roadblocks for DR!Asriel whoops I mean Ralsei, things we have to help him through. Practical problems where the solution is friendship speech + therapy.
To make a slightly heavy-handed comparison, Ralsei saying we exist to serve Lightners and gratefully referring to himself as Kris's lackey is Anthy saying I'm the Rose Bride because I like it. It's the kind of reason we're inclined to reflexively overrule without working to deal with it at its root. Ralsei is Asriel, minus the irreconcilable and bittersweet parts, someone whose objections to being helped have either been removed or simplified down until we can feel good about disabusing him of them. He's our wish fulfillment in the way that candy on trees might be Susie's and a city of shining lights might be Noelle's and Giant Arcade Consoles might be Berdly's: an Asriel you can help, who you can make go to therapy and deal with the problems that keep him from caring for himself; who'll shut up, comply and let himself be saved.
...so the fact that Kris – whose personal issues are opaque, complex, and frustrating; who appears to be actively hiding parts of their life and motives from us; who clearly doesn't want our help or an improved social life at the expense of their agency – finds him so distasteful might not just be because he's a parody of their brother or Secretly Evil or whatever. If Ralsei is "the kid they're supposed to be" it's not just his fluff and horns!
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