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words-for-holland · 3 years

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Always Yours

Pairing: Tom Holland x Reader

Summary: Sometimes dating a celebrity is hard...but Tom & Y/N have always said no matter what happens they could get through anything. Some angst but a lot of fluff.

A/N: So sorry for leaving yall hanging! Life is just crazy right now and this blog needs a lot of TLC tbh!! Also ehh I def dont think this was my best work but enjoy?

“Oof” Y/N lets out as she plops on to her boyfriend who was lying comfortable on the couch. Tom groaned at the impact with a cheeky smile on his face, his arms instantly wrapping around Y/N’s frame.

“Y’know..there are empty seats right there.” The soft brown-eyed boy gestured with the flick of his thick head as Y/N raises her eyes looking down at him, pretending to be slightly offended.

“Oh I see how it is then. It’s cool...Ill just cuddle with Tessa instead. I know she would welcome me with open arms instead of—” As she slowly starts getting off his chest, Tom is quick to pull her back in, securing her with his strong arms. “No baby, I was just kidding. I want you right here, and Im never letting you go.” he pleas.

The only thing Y/N could manage was letting out a fit of giggles into his chest, a sound that Tom adored and would do absolutely anything to hear every minute of every day. They stay like this for a while enjoying the feeling of each other as they both run their hands into each others hair, the feeling of their chests moving up and down, the subtle thumps of their heartbeats, and the little slips of adoration that came out of their mouths. It was peaceful. A moment that nobody could really take a way because it was theirs.

Y/N casually pulls up her phone, and scrolls through Twitter when she noticed a particular tweet on her timeline. Her eyebrows furrow, as she read the 160 character message.

Why Tom Holland Should Be With Aaliyah Cole and Dump Y/N: A Thread.

She knew it wasnt a good idea to open up the thread. She knew very well that everything within the shallow string of tweets would be a complete waste of her time because it was made up by fans who just wanted to satisfy their fantasy of shipping Tom with his co-star. Who can blame them? They always had great chemistry, but it was part of the job and thats all it would ever be.

“You’re awfully quiet.” Tom murmurs, as he places soft kisses at the crown of her head. “Whats going on?” She was lucky her phone was facing away from Tom, quickly closing the app and pretending to be on one of her many tabs in Safari.

“Mmm..nothing.” Y/N lies softly, a tight-lipped smiled plastered on her face.

“Absolute bullocks. Youre not a very good liar.” He chuckles. “Tell me darling. Whats on your mind?”

Y/N rolls her eyes in response. She’s heard that comment one too many times in her life from everyone shes known. After not giving it much thought, she gives in, sighing heavily. “Dont judge me for what Im about to say.”

“Mmm...I think it might depend on wha— Ow” Tom reacts as he playfully rubs the side of his chest that Y/N hit. “Okay too soon for jokes. Go on.”

Again, Y/N sighs as she props herself up. “Its just ... well a lot of your fans keeps talking about wanting you to get with Aaliyah.” She looks down trying not to make eye contact with Tom, who she’d imagine was looking at her with annoyance.

Tom rolls his eyes at the ridiculousness. Not so much at Y/N but the fact that some of his fans just didnt want to accept the fact that he was happy with Y/N. If it had to come from his mouth to stop the stupid rumors and give his girlfriend peace, then hed gladly yell it from the rooftops for everyone to hear. “Thats it Im making a statement about it.”

Y/N’s eyes widen in fear, scrambling to prevent him from grabbing his phone on the table next him. “No no no no.” She repeatedly declines. “You’ll only make it worse.”

“Darling, Im not going to stand here and watch you get all insecure because of their delusional ship.”

“Yeah well Im not gonna be the reason your fans hate me because Im getting in the way of your friendship with Aaliyah Cole.” She fires back.

Tom was ready to open his mouth only to be cut off once again. “And you know better. That is how your fans will always see it.”

“Okay, are you done?” He calmly asked, cautiously observing her. Rarely did Y/N ever get worked up about anything, but when she had her tangents, Tom always made sure she got off everything she needed to say before he becomes her voice of reason.

“Yeah, I guess.” she says feeling defeated. “Look its whatever and Im tired, can we just let this go and forget this whole conversation even happened?”

Tom was unconvinced, but didnt want to push her further. So reluctantly, he gave in and wrapped his arms around Y/N as they both tried to lull themselves to sleep.

***

Y/N wasnt sure how she ended up in the Tube. It was strange how the lights flickered off the rusted tile floor. The train was no where to be seen, but off to the side of the railroads was pitch black, she could hardly see beyond. To her right she noticed herself standing in the corner of the room, and to her surprise Aaliyah was there. Her milk chocolate kissed skin, and fashionably long frizzy hair dropped down past her shoulders. Her figure long and poised, as she wore a rain jacket and sweats. An outfit only she could pull off and make it look like she was a model for Vogue. Aasliyah smiles brightly at Y/N.

“Hey Y/N.” She says cheerfully as a genuine friend would.

To Y/N’s surprise she greeted her back in the same tone. “Hey Aaliyah...uhh whats going on?” Y/N wasnt sure if she wanted the answer of how they both ended up in the Tube or if she truly wanted to know how her day went.

“Well Im getting ready to present at the Oscars.” She replies, a smile plastered as if she was so excited about it, almost too excited like she was keeping a secret.

“Really? Oh my god, that’s amazing! Im so proud of you Aaliyah! Who are you taking?”

Aaliyah pauses for a few moment looking back and forth, making sure no one else was around. “Okay can you keep a secret?” She whispered.

Y/N nods her head slowly, not having the slightest clue of what was going on. “Im taking Tom. I think he really likes me, and well...I like him too! Do you think maybe I should ask him when we go?” Aaliyah asked genuinely. It was almost like she had no recollection of Y/N and Tom being a couple. “I think we would look good together. Everyone is already making rumors and ships about us.”

Y/N backs aways lowly only to bump into a broad figure. As she turns around she sees Tom, emotionless and almost sad. “Y/N.” He speaks out. “I dont think this is going to work out. Im leaving you.”

Y/N’s heart quickens, and her breaths become shorter as she tries to find a way to run. Running and running into the darkness, until all she could hear was Tom’s faint voice calling out her name.

***

“Y/N! Y/N! Baby wake up please.” Tom cries as he gently shakes his girlfriend from her disturbed sleep.

Quickly Y/N opens her eyes and clutches on to Toms hoodie firmly. Back home, and in Toms arms. It was a dream was all she thought. A sigh of relief escaping from her mouth.

“Darling...” he speaks softly, worried about his girlfriend. “Are you okay?”

Y/N looks up at him and nods frantically. “Mmm..bad dream.”

“Yeah it seemed like it. You were so frightened...I was scared. What happened?” He’s looking at her, trying to read her saddened eyes, wanting to desperately understand what scared her so he could make it all go away for her.

Y/N looks down at her fiddling hands, as she sits on the couch. “I uhh...” she lets out a chuckle, thinking of the ridiculousness of it all. “I uhh...dreamed about Aaliyah going to the oscars and saying how she loved you and how you two are perfect for each other. When I turned around I saw you but you werent happy and said you were leaving me.”

Tom doesnt say a word, all he could think about was how sorry he felt to put Y/N in this position. Though both of them knew, It wasnt Toms fault, or anyone’s for that matter. Feelings are feelings and that was okay. No human being was ever born perfect and without insecurities.

Y/N always tried to be a good sport with situations like this knowing every shippers theory and evidence were hardly ever true, but at some point there was only so much she could take before it all came out like an oil spill. Maybe it was a sign that she wasnt good enough to be with Tom if half of his fanbase thought this way as well.

Tom cradled her into his arms again, holding her tightly and kissing the top of her head. “Darling, I know youre still doubting yourself about all of this, but please believe me when I tell you that I love you so so much and no matter what happens...Im always yours.” He whispers gently in her ear. “It was only a dream and these ridiculous rumors and theories are just that. No one woman in the world could ever make me feel the way I feel for you.”

Y/N blinks softly, as she stares into space. Afraid and in a weird way ashamed, its funny how something so small and so minimal could affect her self-esteem so greatly. Tom gently brings her head up, so her eyes can meet his. He rolls his thumb on the bottom of her soft lips. “Hey, I love you.” Tom smiles.

Time stopped for the both of them the moment Y/N looked into his eyes, she felt safe. All the bad words and thoughts slowly disappear. Tom was right, none of the things that anyone said about their relationship mattered. She knew Tom loved her, and how much she truly loved him. Isnt that enough? Of course not. It was more than enough. A smile slowly forming on Y/N’s face. “Theres that smile I love so much.” He comments.

“Im sorry, for being such a —”

“No. Its okay. You have a right to feel the way you did.” He picks up her hand and leaves a gentle kiss.

“I love you so much Tom.” She says pressing her lips to his. “I dont deserve you.”

“Darling, its me that doesnt deserve you. Im always yours.” Tom proclaims as he kisses her back.

#tom holland #tom holland imagine #tom holland x reader #peter parker #peter parker imagine #peter parker x reader

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orbitariums · 3 years

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𝐠𝐢𝐫𝐥𝐬 𝐨𝐧 𝐟𝐢𝐥𝐦 | 𝐛𝐚𝐜𝐤 𝐬𝐞𝐚𝐭 | 𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐯𝐞 𝐫𝐨𝐠𝐞𝐫𝐬 (𝟏𝟒)

omg! this chapter is a bit shorter than most and it’s lowkey a filler kinda sorta i just wanted to show them hanging out together and show their lives

next chapter is gonna be the same format but with a lil spice...

warnings: some smut, fluff an’ sweet domesticity :’)

word count: 6.1k

𝐠𝐢𝐫𝐥𝐬 𝐨𝐧 𝐟𝐢𝐥𝐦 | 𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐭 𝐟𝐨𝐮𝐫𝐭𝐞𝐞𝐧: 𝐛𝐚𝐜𝐤 𝐬𝐞𝐚𝐭 | 𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐯𝐞 𝐫𝐨𝐠𝐞𝐫𝐬

You screamed so loud that Steve poked his head out from the bathroom where he was brushing his teeth to check on you in the living room, where you were cooped up on the couch with your iPad, your eyes glued to the screen.

“You okay?” Steve asked through a mouthful of toothpaste, eyebrows furrowed in concern.

He was pleasantly surprised when you turned to face him and you were positively beaming, baring your glistening teeth in a wide smile, your eyes glittering.

“I keep getting orders!” you exclaimed, referring to your all new clothing store brand that you had in the works earlier that summer. Recently, it had been taking off just how you wanted.

Steve discarded his toothbrush and bounded over to you, making you drop your iPad on the couch as he scooped you up effortlessly, hugging you tight. You squealed with happiness, wrapping your legs around Steve’s waist. He was such a serious guy, it was nice when he made such a grand, intimate gesture like this towards you. He smothered your face and cheeks with kisses, leaving the last smooch on your forehead.

“I’m so happy for you, doll,” he grinned, his eyes glimmering just like yours.

The way Steve’s excitement matched yours just reminded you that he was rooting for you— he was on your side, which felt so rare for you. Steve was a rare treasure in your life, and you still couldn’t wrap your mind around how you’d found him.

You giggled, giddy with excitement,

“I’m so glad I have you to celebrate this with.”

“Who would I be if I wasn’t your hype man?” Steve asked, looking directly into your eyes with a smile on his lips.

“Steve, you are literally my best friend,” you grinned, your heart swelling by how taken aback you were with how deeply he expressed his love. “Now time for me to call my other bestie.”

Steve grinned,

“Does that mean I have to put you down?”

You laughed, rolling your eyes playfully,

“I mean, if you wanna give it away…”

“Noted,” Steve rescinded, setting you down on the floor before him where you returned to your favorite place— right under Steve, with him hovering over you and keeping you safe.

He kissed you sweetly on the lips before leaving you to call Aaliyah on the couch.

“Hey best friend,” she answered the phone with a trill.

“Hi girlie,” you grinned, absolutely shining.

“Ooh, someone’s in a good mood! What happened?!” Aaliyah straightened herself up in her bed, all ears.

“Your girl keeps making sales,” you glanced away from the camera as if it were no big deal to you, only to return with a big grin on your face.

“Okay work!” Aaliyah practically screeched, jumping out of her bed. “Girl, you need to come back soon so we can get drunk drunk. Like, drunk. Just for you.”

“I’ll be back, try not to miss me too much.”

“You seem to be having the time of your life, though, girl. I’m honestly kinda surprised. But like, pleasantly surprised,” Aaliyah commented— if only she knew.

She still thought you were spending your time in New York with family, she didn’t have a clue about Steve. You didn’t want to have to lie to her, but you knew it was the smart decision for now. Besides, it wasn’t like you were ridden with guilt— if anything, Aaliyah would understand your reasoning.

“I know, New York really is where dreams come true,” you noted sarcastically, earning a quiet chuckle from Steve in the kitchen.

“Okay, city girl. Just don’t forget where you came from,” Aaliyah smirked playfully. “For real though, I’m so proud of you.”

“Thank you, my love. I miss you.”

“Me too, girl.”

“So what have you been up to?”

For a few hours, you and Aaliyah caught up over Facetime. She filled you in on what you’d been missing at home, and how summer and school was going for her, since she was trying to get into med school now. In truth, it wasn’t like there was much to catch up on, since it had only been a week since you’d been apart, you just loved each other that much. You had to hang up when you saw the time, since you had a date with Steve at the museum. You were glad that he seemed to be getting more comfortable taking you to the more public places, even if it meant you both had to be discreet. But that wasn’t hard, you were so comfortable with each other that you didn’t bother much with other people, and others didn’t bother too much with you. You were too preoccupied with each other to even notice much of anything else.

You still didn’t understand how it wasn’t obvious that Steve was Captain America even when he was in his trusty disguise of glasses and a cap, considering how massive he was. You’d even noticed people staring in a mix of wonderment and desire when you were out with him, because he was quite the specimen. You never really got jealous, but you always found yourself gripping his hand tighter when that happened. Of course, he never paid other people much mind.

“You ready?” Steve asked, his back facing you as he heard you come out of the bedroom.

“Think so,” you chimed happily.

Steve turned around at the sound of your voice and immediately felt his heart drop to his stomach. He paused, unsure of what to even say. You were wearing a cream colored silk mini-dress, a gold plated necklace with earrings to match, along with heels. You were positively dazzling, even beyond your outfit— Steve truly thought you looked good all the time, but when you dressed up, you dressed up.

“Wow,” he breathed, truly at a loss for words, his eyes raking up and down your body. He was truly amazed by your presence— just being here made him feel like he was in the presence of a goddess. If you thought you were confused by how you’d won someone like him, you’d be knocked out by Steve’s disbelief.

You felt your cheeks grow warm at the way Steve was silently worshipping you. He looked so innocent, standing there wide-eyed in awe. It was almost as if he hadn’t seen every single part of you, as if you didn’t realize that his eyes were on you almost all the time— well, the latter was true. He never got tired of your beauty. You were truly timeless. But eventually, you laughed, shaking your head and stepping forward and taking his hands in your own.

“Close your mouth, you’ll catch flies,” you joked with him, reaching in to kiss his lips.

“You look incredible. When don’t you?” he smiled, looking you up and down once again. He gestured to your neck, furrowing his brows. “Where’d you get that necklace?”

“This one?” you looked down, then back up, shrugging. “Think I made it.”

“Of course you did,” Steve shook his head, chuckling under his breath. “Gorgeous and talented. How could I not guess that?”

“You’re so corny, Steve,” you snorted, pressing your hand against his chest. “I love it.”

He smoothly maneuvered his arm around your waist so you were close to him, leading you out the door.

“Shall we?” he pulled you close to him.

When you got to the museum, you both were glad to see that it wasn’t crowded, but not unnaturally empty. It almost felt like your circumstances were normal, and that felt nice and unique from your usual system. Steve never made it feel like the two of you had to be in hiding, but the illusion that the precautions weren’t so necessary here felt nice. Of course, it was only an illusion.

You were both always careful, but you were too enamoured by one another to let the issue of privacy stress you the way it did before. Steve’s previous anxiety surrounding keeping you both safe and secret had improved so much ever since you actually came around and lit up his life. He almost wished he had realized how much of a good thing this was sooner, then he would’ve had you right next to him ages ago.

The way Steve held your hand when you stepped out the car and all the way into the museum admittedly had you feeling incredibly special. He had you on his arm, but the way you were shining made it so clear that you were one of a kind, in a league of your own. You just happened to complement each other nicely, even perfectly. That was rare for even the closest of couples, so you were eternally grateful. You matched each other like chocolate and vanilla ice cream, explicitly sweet. You weren’t unaware of the eyes on the both of you as you strode through the museum— hell, together, the two of you looked like Greek gods, one beautiful inside and out, the other gracious, hulking, and strong. You might as well have been reincarnations of Aphrodite and Ares.

You had never been in this museum before, it was called MoMa, short for The Museum of Modern Art. Truthfully, you didn’t spend much time in museums back home. You were much more of an outdoors kind of gal, but you enjoyed being in this museum with Steve almost as much as you did day drinking at an outdoor cafe. The museum was undoubtedly fancy and sophisticated, making you feel right at home while you were all dressed up and always, always carrying yourself with poise.

Steve felt lucky just to be standing beside you, and the two of you enjoyed your time together drifting through the museum, fixating on one work of art from the next, taking your time and staying close together.

“Isn’t that you?” Steve joked, pointing to a marble statue of a beautiful woman who actually did look a bit like you.

“You’re too charming,” you snickered, squeezing his side.

He reached over and kissed your forehead,

“I know a work of art when I see it.”

You pushed your head up so you could reach his lips, pressing a kiss on his mouth, closing your eyes and shutting out the dim light of the museum for just a second, so you could get lost in him. When you opened your eyes, you and Steve made direct eye contact, gazing in each other’s eyes as if you were the only two in the room. Steve almost seemed to stand completely still, lost in the way your eyes glimmered like the water you spent so much time around back home. You knew you had him right where you wanted, and you gave his arm a squeeze as you bit down on your lip, hiding an impish smile.

“Come on,” you nodded towards the exit, gripping his hand and making your way towards the exit.

It was almost like you were lugging Steve behind you, the way he was following your lead like a helpless puppy. You had to fight the urge to cackle at how quickly he melted for you, just from a single kiss. Not only was he touch starved, but he was infatuated with you. That made matters even worse. Steve was a man with honorable impulse control, but when it came to you, looking so beautiful, kissing him so soft and sweet just how he liked, “control” was out of the picture. And now that you were leaving, it was clear what you were both getting yourselves into.

You got into the car, eagerly settling into the backseat. Steve, on the other hand, rushed into the driver’s seat and was about to start the car when you asked,

“What are you doing?”

Steve’s head nearly whipped back to look at you, and he furrowed his eyebrows.

“We’re gonna leave, right?”

You just stared at him for a moment, judgment plastered on your face. You blinked,

“It takes like thirty minutes to get home.”

Steve made a face, his eyebrow quirked up in confusion,

“You don’t wanna go home?”

You rolled your eyes, but you couldn’t help the smile that was tugging at your lips,

“Can you just come to the back?”

He swiftly climbed into the back seat and you chuckled,

“You’re so silly, old man.”

“‘S been a while,” he grunted.

Your eyes flitted up and down his face, and then met his eyes.

“Need you. Now,” was all you said in a voice so quiet that it was like you were telling him a secret.

You made eye contact with Steve once more and he understood, Steve barely even had the chance to speak before you were scrambling on top of him, pressing your lips harshly against his and opening your mouth, Steve following your lead and doing the same, your tongues in each other’s mouths as you kissed. It was less like kissing and more like you were trying to compete to see how long you could hold your breaths, moaning repeatedly into each other’s mouths and only consuming oxygen through heavy pants. It was like you forgot you needed to operate normally, the way you were rubbing frantically against each other and abusing your limited backseat space. Your dress was jammed against your legs because you hadn’t pulled it up properly, and your knees were knocking against the inside of the car.

“I wanna fuck,” you pulled away from his lips, only for him to pout at the lack of contact, resolving to kiss your neck instead, making your skin burn hot on the space where his lips were. You gasped from the unexpected feeling, Steve sucking at all the right spots on your body. He had you all figured out, from the first moment you got intimate with each other. But you didn’t get distracted from your main objective, pushing him away so you could focus, his chest heaving up and down below you. “Right now.”

Steve raised his brows. His face, already a flushed shade of pink from the abundance of physical proximity, darkened to a deep red.

“You… you want me here? Right-right now?”

Your jaw clenched. Just by looking into your eyes, which had darkened like a stormy, grey sky, Steve could see just how serious you were. You were determined you were to get what you wanted, and who was he to get in the way of your needs? Of course, he wasn’t quite thinking logically, but there wasn’t enough room for logic when you were smothering him like this in the car, no matter how spacious it was.

You nodded almost solemnly. You were like a cat in heat right now. If a switch had turned on in Steve earlier, then right now, a big red button was being pressed inside of you, only it meant “go.”

“Yes. Please don’t make me wait, daddy,” you purred, putting on your best angel face, and something stirred deep inside of Steve when you called him that, when you looked at him like that.

His voice went soft and he nearly cooed at you,

“‘M not gonna make you wait… it’s just…”

“No one’s gonna see us,” you leaned in to kiss him again, and pulled away before he could deepen the kiss the way he wanted to, leaving him to pull desperately at your waist. “We’re parked far away from everyone else, see? And it-it’s dark!”

Steve smirked at your frenzied reply, consisting of one excuse after the other,

“You really need this right now, hmm?”

“Don’t get cocky. You need this more than I do,” you bit back snarkily, grinding against his very apparent erection, which throbbed against your center. You bit down on your lip, failing to conceal a devious smirk. “See?”

“Yeah, I-I see,” Steve groaned, glancing down at where your bodies met in the middle, wishing you would take your dress off now. He regained his composure to ask you this one question. “Why so sudden?”

You growled, eager to get past the niceties of fucking,

“Because. Now shut up so I can do my job.”

“Oh wow,” Steve chuckled, raising his brows like he was impressed. “You’re very dedicated to-”

You weren’t kidding.

“Stop talking,” you said, putting your hand over his mouth.

He looked up at you, all the amusement drained from his eyes, replaced by desire and awe. He felt inclined to listen to you, amazed by the new side of you that was coming out all of the sudden. It wasn’t like he always dominated you, and it was obvious that you had Steve wrapped around your finger. But this… this was different.

You kissed him furiously, grinding against him with expertise, making him arch his hips up just to meet you halfway, but you weren’t letting him give in to the pleasure fully yet. You didn’t have time to waste, and yet you had all the time in the world.

You let the tip of your tongue slide against his, then your tongue trailed against his open lips, making him let out a low pitched groan, his eyes half lidded at the soft but prominent sensation. You wanted to make this quick, but every part of you was savoring the moment. It had been a while since you’d done anything so thrilling in public, even if you were sure no one could see you.

Steve’s hand snaked its way up your dress, wasting no time. It took him a minute to catch on in the beginning, but now that he had, he was right where you needed him to be. He went to push your underwear to the side and the look on his face was priceless when he realized you weren’t wearing any. He was pleased that you were even more accessible, but at the same time he was shocked. He hadn’t been expecting it.

“You aren’t wearing anything under that?” he asked breathlessly, his fingers circling your clit immediately, the pad of another finger dipping into your slit with ease because you were already soaking. “Fuck, you’re already wet.”

He started pumping a finger in and out of you, hitting a perfect spot and brushing up against your walls just right. You moaned and rode his fingers, hips thrusting up in the air as you threw your head back.

“Baby,” you panted after some time. “Take your pants off.”

You watched as he hurried to follow your commands, his pants and boxers pooling at his knees as he sat there with his dick erect against his stomach, both of you hot and restless. You practically lunged forward, grinding against him while he worked to unzip your dress, pulling it over your head. The whole event was a mess of clothes being flung everywhere, your bodies knocking into each other and the car seats. It was a blur, really, and you remember crying out when you first sunk onto him, wrapping your arms around his neck and taking him smoothly, slowly, as he watched you with his mouth dropped in an o shape and his eyes glazed over.

“Fuck,” you whined, taking his length. It was one thing to be beneath him, it was another thing to be on top and be stretched out like never before. It was like a completely different feel and a completely different angle, and still perfect nonetheless. “You feel so good baby, look at me.”

You forced Steve to look up at you, perking his chin up with your finger. He was shuddering, his thighs shaking each time you sunk down onto him. You were practically riding him into submission, and the thought made you smirk.

“You like this?” you cooed. “You like when I ride you?”

He nodded quickly, his Adam’s apple bobbing in his throat as he swallowed.

“Say it,” you demanded, inching your hand up his chest and settling your palm around his throat.

His hips bucked up inadvertently, and he groaned,

“Y-yes baby, I could fuck you like this forever.”

“Yeah, I bet you could,” you crooned, letting your finger trail along his face, your nail tickling his cheek.

As you got used to taking him, you began to ride him like a pro, the movement of your hips syncing with his effortlessly, bouncing up and down and grinding on him all at once. No matter what you did, the feeling was unbeatable for the both of you, and you couldn’t get enough. On top of that, you had clearly taken charge tonight. Steve was enamoured by you, goddess that you were, and he wanted you on top a lot more now.

Granted, it was the first time, but he only wished it could’ve happened sooner, because then he could cherish this feeling earlier. You took the lead with such ease, because you knew what you were doing and that was clear. Your sex appeal radiated off of you without you even having to try, and your confidence was just the cherry on top. Steve could tell you were enjoying yourself, shamelessly eating up his submission. You were being greedy, reckless. He wanted more and more.

Your movements were graceful and easy, your back arched to get that crucial spot for the two of you, arms wrapped lazily around his neck as you rode him like the perfect wave. He obeyed immediately when you told him to keep his previously wandering hands on your waist, watching in amazement as you led him, the captain.

You lowered your head down to his, pressing your forehead against his as you began to moan, and he could tell you were about to come by the way you squeezed around him. When you did, it was like an explosion. You nearly screamed into his ear, but instead bit down on his neck, leaving a bite that was sure to bruise. You kept riding him while you were coming, anyway, telling him to come with you and triggering his own orgasm, letting him fill you up with his cum. For a while, the two of you just sat there, Steve still inside of you, his head knocking against your chest, while you wrapped your arms around him.

❊

“I’m putting a looot of trust into you right now, you know that?” you pulled your shirt off, stretching your arms up above your head.

Steve laughed, shaking his head,

“No pressure.”

“I’m absolutely joking,” you leaned forward to give him a kiss while cupping his face, lingering at his lips for a few seconds with a soft smile before you pulled away. “I know it’ll turn out amazing. But I can’t stay still for too long.”

“It won’t take more than an hour, I promise,” Steve put his pinky out in front of him and you rolled your eyes before interlacing your pinky with his.

“As long as I’m with you, I don’t mind.”

“Okay. Your bra is real pretty, but that has to go, too,” Steve said, gesturing to your pink lace bra.

“Can you take it off me, please?” you smiled innocently, but Steve just stared you down.

“If I do that, you’re gonna try to distract me,” he stood his ground, and you chortled, cupping his face in your hands as you leaned forward,

“Steve, I would never. I understand the importance of the artist’s process. Here, I’ll even turn around.”

You turned so your back was facing Steve, your shoulders relaxing when you felt his big hands brushing against your skin, undoing your bra. You felt his bare hands roam up the expanse of your back and rolled your shoulders back into the all encompassing touch.

“Just trying to understand my canvas,” Steve muttered, his broad hands cupping your shoulders like he was giving you a massage.

You sighed, rolling back your neck until you could see a glimpse of him, a slight smile on your face. You crossed your arms over your chest to cover your breasts, making an X shape with your arms.

“I’m sure,” you replied, and he lurched forward to plant a kiss on your lips before leaning back, gesturing for you to lie down.

You lay down on your front side, your back fully exposed to Steve. Rays of light splashed against your back and shone in Steve’s softened face. You could hear him cleaning his paintbrushes in the mason jar of water that was balancing on the bed sheets, the brush clanking against the rim of the jar and the water sloshing around with the bristles. Your days with Steve were growing more and more intimate as the time passed on.

Steve had finally given in to your pleas that he draw more, but he took it a step further and decided he would paint instead, using you as a canvas. Steve caught on fast, and you loved that about him. Whatever you wanted to do, he was down, and he would go that extra mile because he wanted to, not because he didn’t feel like he had an option.

You tapped your feet against the bed sheets to the rhythm of the Jhene Aiko song playing in the background, and grinned to yourself when you heard Steve humming along. You put him onto so much that he didn’t even realize the things he was picking up from you along the way.

“Alright,” Steve grinned in satisfaction, dipping his brush into the selection of paints on his easel. “You ready?”

You gave him a thumbs up, giddy with excitement. Steve had to gently touch your ankles to remind you to stop shaking, and you uttered a giggly apology while he shook his head playfully.

“Never had such a difficult canvas,” Steve straddled the back of your legs as you lay still below him.

“Shut up,” you chuckled, cutting yourself off with a gasp when you felt the cool paint against your back. “Shit, that’s cold as fuck!”

“Language,” Steve smirked, and you barked a bitter laugh.

“This is coming from the man who was describing the ways he wanted to deflower my body in obscene depth this morning,” you clapped back at him, and he opened his mouth to reply, only to recede with a resigning sigh. Noting his silence, you simpered. “I win.”

“Just remember I am the one with total control over your body right now. One misstroke and this painting goes from Mona Lisa quality to absolute shit,” Steve reminded you, waving a finger in the air.

“Mona Lisa? Someone thinks real highly of themselves,” you poked fun at him as he continued to layer paint on your back to create a light blue base. “Besides, paint washes off.”

“I’ll lock you out of the bathroom,” Steve sniggered, much too pleased with himself for your liking. You swatted at him with a reprimanding hand and he dodged it. “Alright, alright. I won’t mess it up on purpose, I promise.”

“You better not,” you murmured, already sinking into sleep. You couldn’t help it. You were tired from being worn out this morning, because Steve did do everything to your body that he said he would do, namely fucking the daylights out of you. And, Steve painting on your back was oddly therapeutic in a way, and the brush against your back felt like feathers from a pillow, lulling you to sleep. So, you fell asleep as the sound of the music playing faded away.

You woke up to the sound of Steve’s deep voice in your ear, telling you to wake up so he could take pictures of you.

Your eyes trickled open slowly and you looked up at Steve who was laying on his side next to you, positively beaming. You smiled sleepily, the fog from your sleep starting to clear from the light Steve was emanating. His face was so close up, you couldn’t help but brush your nose against his and give him a butterfly kiss before kissing his nose with your lips.

“I finished,” Steve grinned in celebration, and in that moment you were sure you’d never seen him look so happy, except for when you stepped off the private jet and into his life.

“Baby,” you wrapped your arms around his neck and got up gingerly, so as not to mess up the masterpiece that was still drying on your back. “Lemme see.”

Steve got up quickly and dragged the full body mirror towards you, standing behind it and holding it up, a proud smile glued to his face. You couldn’t help but giggle at how satisfied he looked with the results, and your heart swelled to see him so happy and actually doing some personal hobbies outside of work. You were glad you were with him, and you were glad that meant he got a break from the hustle of his everyday life. This break wouldn’t last forever, but at least he was getting one. He didn’t often do things that he actually liked to do, he was so worked up. When he was with you, he was free to do whatever, and you actually pushed him to do the things he enjoyed.

You turned so your back faced the mirror, and craned your neck to see the work of art. It was a divine myriad of colors on your glowing skin, a light blue sky as the base, a painting of the sun and moon on top. The moon and sun each had eyes, a nose, and a mouth, and the moon was hugging the sun, covering its right eye. He had drawn swirly clouds and glinting stars all around to truly bedazzle the piece. You couldn’t stop smiling, it was truly beautiful and probably the most intimate thing you’d ever done with someone.

“Steve, you’re literally amazing at this. I’m serious,” you prodded him when he shook his head in embarrassment. “I mean look, you know it’s amazing, you’re so proud of yourself! And you should be.”

You scrambled over to him, tugging at the camera that was hanging by a strap around his neck,

“C’mon. Take pictures of it!”

“Yeah, just—” Steve cocked his head to the side, trailing off, and you realized immediately that he was distracted by your bare upper torso.

You shook your head, laughing to yourself, and stood up on your knees to pose for him.

“You can take some just for yourself, too,” you winked.

❊

You woke up to the feeling of Steve stroking your face with his thumb and kissing the top of your head ever so gently, the room dark except for the fuzzy light blue glare of the TV screen a few feet away. You snuggled into his chest, already laid up on top of him, both your bodies stretched out on the cozy couch.

You sighed sleepily and blinked up at him. He was fixated on the TV, halfway through the first Deathly Hallows movie. You’d fallen asleep somewhere towards the end of Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince, so you were quite pleasantly surprised that Steve let you lay on him for so long, and that he continued watching the movies. His blue eyes were unmoving, glued to the screen and thoroughly engaged in the story. You smiled below him and poked his chest, making him glance down at you with an unassuming “hmm?” sound.

“How long have I been asleep?”

“A long time,” Steve smooched your forehead, then your nose, and then your lips, suffocating you with his kisses. “How are you feeling?”

“Not as sleepy. We stayed up way too late last night,” you reminded him, and he shrugged.

“At least I’m almost finished,” he said, referring to the Harry Potter movies that you had stayed up late last night to continue.

“We gotta figure out your Hogwarts house,” you squinted up at him, making the calculations in your head. “I think you’re a Gryffindor. I am too.”

“Gryffindor, Hufflepuff… it’s all the same, isn’t it?” Steve sighed, and you gasped, sitting up on his lap and looking at him, appalled,

“Steve! Have you learned nothing from the past seven movies?”

He cackled, shaking his head,

“I’m kidding. I think so too, doll.”

You pushed his chest with a dramatic pout,

“Nevermind, asshole, you’re definitely a Slytherin.”

“Hey, I don’t wanna be a bad guy!”

“Boo fucking hoo,” you droned. “You get to be a hero all the goddamn time, take your Slytherin house placement and go. Also, you clearly haven’t been paying attention! Not all Slytherins are bad.”

“I’ll take being an Avenger over being a Slytherin any day,” Steve noted casually, and you couldn’t help but grin at the side note. You positioned yourself on his lap so you were straddling him and he put his hands around your waist almost reflexively.

“Yeah?”

“Of course,” Steve insisted. “My job is tough but, someone’s gotta do it.”

“You ever wish you weren’t like this? I mean… if you’d known things would turn out the way they did…”

You bit your lip in anticipation as you waited for Steve’s answer, because he was taking a while to think about it. You hoped you weren’t pushing a boundary here by asking this question, but Steve knew you had good intentions, and you knew him long enough to know that he wouldn’t be afraid to answer you.

He finally found it in him to give you a cohesive answer. He truly had to think, because it wasn’t a feeling he could quite put into words. People thought Steve was this stonelike, serious guy, but he was mainly just pensive. He was still the same Steve he’d always been, even before the serum, even before he became a figure of fame. Now, people just happened to take him a whole lot more seriously. People admired him. But all the while, he was still grieving, still trying to figure out his footing in this world. Now that he was with you, the process was going along much smoother.

He clasped your hands, bringing your interlaced fingers to his lips,

“I’ve been through a lot. And it’s hard for me to face things head on sometimes, but I wouldn’t change it for the world. I have to admit, though, it really has been nice just… being unseen. Just for a few days, being unknown by the world. Under the radar, I guess. I get to just be Steve, not Captain. And don’t get me wrong, I’d never complain about my responsibilities. I’m just a private person. I’m not in this for the fame and the attention. That’s the only thing I’d ever change. I just want to do what’s right. I don’t need the praise.”

You nodded, completely understanding. Whenever you and Steve had these deep conversations, you were glad, because you really both listened to each other. You said exactly what was on your minds without fearing judgment. You had kind of expected that to be Steve’s answer, the way he cherished his privacy and didn’t seem to care much for the frills attached to his honorable job.

Notoriety wasn’t Steve’s goal, in fact he figured he’d be better off without it. He was grateful for his work, but he didn’t need the fans and worship that came with it. You could honestly never grow tired of Steve talking about himself— his past, his present, his job, his fears. He hardly talked about himself anyway, he was always engulfed in one thing or another. You liked pulling things out of him, not because you wanted to be intrusive, but because you knew it’d be good for him. Besides, how would you get along if you didn’t truly know each other?

As he spoke, you nodded, taking in each and every word. You let your fingernails lightly scratch his face, trailing along his perfect superhuman skin, lulling him without even realizing it.

“I get that. You could be Steve Rogers and just save lives, and live just how you want to.”

“Yeah,” Steve smiled, gazing up into your eyes, the movie long forgotten in the background. He placed his hands on your hips as if to keep you in place where you were, locking you in like you belonged here and here only. “What about you? Would you change anything?”

You cocked your head with a small smile. You hadn’t been expecting him to ask about you, and it honestly wasn’t something you thought of quite a lot. Maybe if you were still hurting, you’d say yes. But, because your whole life had brought you to this point, here with him and happy with yourself, you couldn’t.

You shook your head, biting down on your lip, your smile expanding,

“No. I wouldn’t. I’m actually kind of content now. Healing’s a long process, but it’s worth it. And I’m with you, so it’s all worth it.”

Steve’s eyes glimmered when you said that, and his fingers dung deeper into your hips.

“Think this is probably the happiest I’ve ever been,” Steve said, and god, he didn’t know how much that meant to you.

tags later!

#girls on film #steve rogers #steve rogers fanfic #steve rogers fic #steve rogers smut #marvel #marvel fic #marvel imagines #imagines #steve rogers imagines #steve rogers x reader #captain america x reader #captain america #captain america smut #steve rogers reader insert #reader insert #marvel reader insert #orbitariums

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egcdeath · 3 years

Text

a blip in the reader-verse

chapter 6: extra! extra! read all about it

series summary: a minor mistake causes a shift in the multiverse that only you have the capacity to fix.

chapter summary: you kept your friends close, and your enemy even closer.

pairing: politician!andy barber x journalist!reader, steve rogers x reader

word count: 4k

warnings: american politics, fake dating/marriage, angst at the end, heavy codependent behavior at the end

author’s note: i saw @jtargaryen18 post about politician!steve a while ago and must’ve internalized it because this chapter pretty much wrote itself. just a heads up: all of my political knowledge comes from political sitcoms, so sorry in advance if i get some things wrong. another warning is that there are still some very unhealthy relationship dynamics at play here, so promise me you won’t be like reader okay?

previous chapter / series masterlist

Is Andy Barber Really the Best for Our Nation’s Future?

Opinion

by Y/N L/N

Feb 7, 2021, 4:36 PM ET

After tonight’s debate, the question that’s begged is if Andrew Barber is truly fit to run our country. Although he’s clearly a front runner for his party’s nomination, he’s shown time and time again that he may actually be our weakest candidate.

His weaknesses were highlighted during the debate, with his dodged questions and vague answers. At this point in time, it’s hard to tell if Barber has a platform at all.

With Super Tuesday just around the corner, I ask you to reevaluate your support for Barber. Though a charming candidate, it seems that that’s all he has, his charm. His policies are weak, and borderline impossible, and he certainly isn’t the right person to become the most powerful man in the world.

—-

When you became conscious, you were no better than unconscious. Your eyes opened and were immediately met with a harshness from the sun peeking through a window. You shifted away from the brightness, body sinking into a memory foam mattress while your nude form rubbed against similarly soft sheets. You sleepily rubbed your eyes before they flitted throughout the room you were in. Observing an oddly clean, generic looking area, you’d quickly connected the dots that you were in a hotel room. A rather fancy one at that.

Soft breathing came from next to you, and as you turned your head a bit more, you were met with the back of a fluffy and dark haired man. You weren’t completely sure, but judging by your history of finding your way to Steve, you’d assumed that it was some alternate form of your partner.

The man in bed next to you yawned, and haphazardly threw an arm in your direction, before rolling over to greet you, “morning sunshine,” he slurred sleepily.

The beard was a bit of a surprise to you. Though you’d begged and begged your Steve to keep it, he often refused for one reason or another. Seeing the man next to you who (what was now much clearer to you) a version of your boyfriend, was a rather pleasant surprise.

“Morning,” you responded in an equally sleepy manner, ignoring the rhythmic vibration coming from your night stand.

“Mm, you should get that,” he mumbled, pressing a disoriented peck to the side of your head while you reached over to grab your phone, which you could now see was the perpetrator of the vibrations.

“Hello?” you asked into the phone.

“Are you dumb? Or are you fucking stupid?” Aaliyah’s voice scolded through the phone. “Do you know what kind of position you’ve put me in? This is a fucking mess, Y/N. All for some dick? How could you be so careless?! Jesus!”

“What are you talking about?” You glanced over at Andy, and sat up a bit, pulling the crisp blankets over your body in an attempt to retain some form of modesty.

“Don’t play dumb with me. You’re fucking Andy Barber, but you’re writing articles about him like you just watched him kill your dog. You realize that this puts all of us at risk, right? You’re gonna lose your job, I’m gonna lose my job since I decided to edit and publish your shit, and you and I will lose any sort of journalistic integrity we’ve ever had, or will have, for the rest of goddamn time! Seriously, you could’ve had anyone, but Andy Barber? Andrew fucking Barber?” she groaned over the line.

“Uh, I’ll uh, call you back,” you whispered.

“You’re joking right? Are you with him right now?”

“Aaliyah!”

“Oh my god, you’re with him right now. You’re a fucking mess,” she huffed before hanging up.

Why did the universe have to send you off to such a shitshow?

You rolled out of bed, and sulked into the bathroom, desperate to find out what was going on. While sitting on the toilet, you scrolled through the wall of notifications; tweets directed at you, messages from confused friends begging you to call them when you had a chance, and even the occasional concerned email.

You grimaced as you read through each one of them, eventually clicking on the article that many seemed to be referencing, which included a paparazzi photo of you and this Andy Barber character entering a hotel together sometime in the late night to early morning, partnered with an article or two of your own criticizing him. At first, you wondered if he was some sort of celebrity, but what you ultimately found out was much worse.

He was a politician. A senator who was running to be president.

You screamed into your hands, before tossing your phone aside, and starting a warm shower for yourself. Perhaps the shower could help jog your memory a bit.

Stepping into the steamy chamber, and letting the water pelt down onto you did do wonders for you, and it gave you a moment of focus. With both your memories from this universe, along with the information you’d been given through your phone, you were able to piece a few aspects of the universe together.

You were a journalist, a popular one at that, Andy was Steve, but not Steve, and also a presidential candidate. Aaliyah was your editor, and a higher-up at the Times, and you were about to have your ass handed to you over an affair. At least Andy wasn’t married.

Your shower must’ve taken longer than you’d expected, as there was a soft knock on the door after some time.

“Everything okay in there?” a slightly muffled voice asked.

“Yeah. Just peachy. Why aren’t you more worried about this?” you called back.

“I have a good publicist. And campaign manager. I just have a good team,” Andy paused briefly. “When you’re ready, room service is ready.”

----

Over aggressive mouthfuls of fresh fruit and bitter coffee, you conversed with Andy.

“How are we gonna fix this?” You questioned while setting down your fork.

“Well, it’s simple. We just have to find some kind of spin to this whole story. Maybe you were just interviewing me, or getting a soundbite from me.” “Why would you agree to get a soundbite from someone who clearly has it out for you?” You set your fork down, and crossed your arms over your white robe clad chest.

“That’s a good question,” Andy nodded a bit, “a good question for someone else to answer.”

“Why don’t we let your publicist figure out how to play this?”

“I’d say I’m a bit of an expert at this at this point, but I’ll call my team.”

“You do that, I need to assess the damage to my career,” you huffed, moving to sit on the bed so that you could aggressively scroll on your phone in peace.

Andy called someone, and you patiently waited while he chatted with them.

“Okay, Y/N. We can’t leave through the front, so my guy’s gonna pick us up in the garage. We have like, half an hour,” he tossed his phone aside, then maneuvered himself to get in bed with you, setting both hands down on either side of you, and placing a soft kiss on your lips. He slowly began to inch down your body, untying the belt of your robe as he did so, when you interrupted him.

“What do you think you’re doing, Andrew?”

“We have time.” He looked up at you.

“We are not doing this. What do you think got us into this mess in the first place?” you frowned, moving one of his hands so you could slide away from him.

“Are you serious?”

“Yes! Why aren’t you taking this seriously! Do you realize that both of our careers are at stake here? I don’t want to lose my job because I’m having an affair with you. You shouldn’t want to lose a shot at office for a woman you’re not even with.”

“Come on, we’ve been doing this for almost a year, and you only have a problem with it now?”

“Yes! The public had no idea before! They’re going batshit now! And the worst part is that I’m the one taking the most heat,” you sighed, and Andy gave you a frown.

“I’m sorry, Y/N. You know I didn’t want this to happen.”

“It’s kinda too late for sorries now.”

——

You stepped out of your suite about five minutes after Andy left, suitcase in tow, blocky sunglasses on your face, and a heathered grey peacoat draped over your shoulders. Although you were stressed from the controversy you’d found yourself in, you couldn’t help but feel the buzz of excitement from having to hide from the paparazzi. At the same time, you felt quite bad for this version of yourself.

When you finally got out to the designated Cadillac, you asked for his driver to roll up the partition, like you’d done a million times before, then looked out of the tinted windows. The ride was pretty awkward, considering you were in no mood to talk to Andy, and Andy felt bad about the issues he’d imposed on you from his own carelessness. He set a cautious hand on top of yours, and though you were agitated, it did brighten your mood the slightest bit.

After what felt like forever, you arrived at his campaign building, and you were ushered into a small, soundproof space, with a large and round pine table in the center of it. Surrounding the table was a very tired looking Aaliyah, and… Tony Stark?

“How’s everyone’s weekend been?” Tony asked, breaking the ice as you and Andy settled into your seats.

“Are we really doing small talk right now?” Aaliyah deadpanned, “sorry, that was uncalled for.”

“Alright, straight to the elephant in the room then. You two were out spotted, big deal, happens all the time to politicians and their mistresses-“

“I’m not his mistress! You know this, Tony,” you huffed.

“Tony knew and not me?” Aaliyah gasped.

“Well-“ you began.

“Save it.”

“It was on a very need-to-know basis,” you muttered.

“Back to what I was saying. I suggest that we don’t address it, unless addressed.”

“I don’t know if you’re dense, or what, but that’s the exact opposite of what we need to do. We have to get on top of this story before the story is that you,” Aaliyah gestured at you, “are packing your shit at the Times.”

The door shot open, and quickly closed. A slightly flustered blonde man stumbled through. “Sorry to interrupt,” he began.

Aaliyah rolled her eyes at this notion, muttering a ‘sure you are’ to herself.

“We just finished polling numbers, and Andy, you’re up?” He projected the screen of his iPad onto a TV in the room, then passed the device over to Andy on his way to sit down.

“Thanks, Vis,” he gave him a curt nod.

“Why would our candidate allegedly hooking up with someone who hates him boost him in the polls?” Tony asked.

“Middle America loves a family man, you know that,” Vision said in a matter of faculty manner. “Andy has had a hard time connecting with that demographic because when they see him, they see an Elitist East-coaster.”

“Hooking up with a hot reporter does not make you a family man,” Aaliyah retorted.

“That brings me to my next point. If you don’t mind, I’d like to add a proposal of my own,” Vision stated, and received a shrug from the rest of the room. “Well, if we need to put a spin on this, the obvious choice is to explain that they’ve been seeing each other the whole time. Under wraps, of course. The photos the paparazzi received are not damning by any means, and look more romantic than sexual, to be quite frank. Y/N wrote those articles to throw the public off her scent, and she didn’t really believe anything she said, and Andy? He’s just a good, all American man who was tired of keeping his relationship under wraps. Everything’s to gain from this plan.”

“Well, I lose my journalistic integrity. That’s a pretty big loss to me. I may never work again,” you rubbed your forehead in a distraught manner.

“You won’t have to worry about working when you’re the First Lady. Think about it, if we can get votes from the swing states, we’ve secured enough electoral votes to have a Barber win. All over a little character rebrand.”

“Excuse me, the First Lady?” You nervously glanced between Vision and Aaliyah while you attempted to pick your jaw up from the floor.

“Well, yes. We can’t exactly get the full ‘family man’ look without Mr. Barber being a real husband.“

“Are we talking, real wedding?” Aaliyah questioned.

“Yes. You just have to be legally bound together for around four years, eight years tops. About twelve would be preferable, but I understand that not everything works out.”

“I don’t object to that,” Andy winked and nudged you a bit.

What a mess.

“Back to what I was saying, we’ll probably need about a two week PR period before we do a press briefing announcing the engagement. Give or take. During that time, we could have your publicist arrange all sorts of good photo ops for you two.”

“Either way, my career is ruined,” you sighed, and Andy set his hand on your back.

“Sorry, sweetheart.”

“You don’t have to do that. We’re not currently standing in front of 30 cameras.”

“Well, we should prepare for when we are in front of 30 cameras.”

“Is it though?” Vision interjected, bringing you and Andy back from your aside. “We can just deflect, maybe have a few of your friends make articles about how what you did wasn’t all that bad.”

“Is it not a valid criticism of me that I was sleeping around with the person who I was also slandering?”

“Is it not possible to criticize someone you care about? In fact, helping someone learn how to improve can be very romantic,” Vision shrugged.

There was a brief silence throughout the bunch while everyone pondered a counter argument.

“That right there, that kind of insight is why we call you the Vision,” Tony shook his head and proudly clapped the man on his back.

“So it’s settled then? We’re really doing this?” You glanced around at your peers while Aaliyah spoke. “Any objections, love birds?”

Andy shrugged, “I’d be happy to spend the rest of my life with her.”

You, on the other hand, weren’t so sure.

——

Barber and his Greatest Critic Break Bread Together on Friday

Y/N L/N Announces She’s Not Resigning from Senior Position, and That She’s Been Seeing Barber!

BREAKING! Barber Announces Relationship with Critic Y/N L/N

Is L/Nber the Ship that Shows us How Relationships Are More Powerful than Politics?

Our New Favorite Political Power Couple Showed Up Together at a Rally, and We Couldn’t Be More Excited.

Barber 7 Points Ahead in the Polls, Leaving Loguidice and Kline Trailing Far Behind

Was Y/N Really in the Wrong?

“L/Nber” Celebrate Valentine’s Day Together

These L/Nber House Hunting Photos Are Giving Us Life!

This was your reality for the next two weeks. The news cycle was filled with a plethora of articles about you, some criticizing you, some criticizing Andy, but most, supporting the two of you in your romantic endeavors. Unsurprisingly, the world loved a good story about two attractive people getting together.

During this period, you didn’t particularly feel like leaving, though the thought had certainly crossed your mind. You just weren’t sure that you wanted to be dealing with those terrible symptoms again in the midst of an already stressful stage of your life. At the same time, it seemed like the universe was not going to be fair with your time in this reality. You were convinced that you were here for the long haul, or at least, until Andy proposed to you.

Although it was a bit annoying, cameras around every corner, a watchful eye on everything that you or Andy even considered doing, you found yourself growing on Andy. In some ways, he was a bit more intense than Steve, whose personality had mellowed out a bit since the Snap.

This had been the first time in all of your travels where you felt like ‘Steve’ was the one pursuing you, and in all honesty, it made you feel good. Even if everything the two of you did had an aftertaste of artificiality.

You spent more and more time with him every day, staying together with him in hotels across the country, visiting local businesses with him to get the perfect photo op, and attending galas with donors. It seemed like in every candid photo of Andy, you weren’t too far behind. By the time the day of your proposal arrived, you weren’t even all that opposed to the marriage.

When the proposal finally arrived, the two of you were sat inside a rather fancy restaurant, finishing up your meal when Andy settled on one knee in front of you, “Y/N,” he began, and you felt the all too familiar tremble of your watch on your wrist.

You almost had to restrain yourself from exclaiming out loud. It’s not that you didn’t like Andy or anything, he’d genuinely grown on you. In the least cheesy way, it wasn’t him, but you. Being somewhere so unfamiliar for so long had begun to create a cumulative exhaustion that wore a bit more on you every day. Feeling homesick was an understatement.

You brought your hands up to your face, and gasped dramatically, squeezing your eyes shut to see if you could possibly produce a few tears, while mobile cameras and a few professional flashes were directed towards you. A few warm droplets slipped down your face, and for a moment you weren’t even sure how fake they were. It seemed like once they started, they couldn’t stop.

You missed Steve, your Steve, the man you’d fallen in love with. You missed your friends, teammates, and family. You missed the stability of knowing what the world held for you next.

In the midst of Andy’s proposal, in what should’ve been the happiest moment of your life, all you could focus on was your overwhelming desire to have a sense of normalcy in your life once again.

——

You woke up in a cold sweat, heart racing in your chest, and shaking your ribcage. You looked up to the ceiling of what you had grown to know was your room in the Compound, your real room, and felt your eyes well up in tears that stung you.

You sat up, and took as deep of a breath as you could manage, when you noticed Wanda sitting by your bedside.

“Oh good, you’re awake,” she said softly, coming closer to you, offering you a glass of water before sitting at the foot of your bed.

“Where’s Steve?” you asked, trying to gauge where you were.

“Honey,” she sighed softly. “I’m so sorry. He’s still missing.”

Your lip trembled as you took a sip. You really were back home.

“I know you’re hurting, but when you feel a little better, we’re going to Medbay. Banner decided that we should probably keep an eye on your vitals, but you were gone before we even had the chance to get you there.”

You gulped down the water, then set it on your bedside table, “so was that all just a dream or something? Why isn’t Steve back?” you huffed frustratedly.

“I don’t know why he isn’t back, but I don’t think you were dreaming. I was trying to watch your dreams, but I couldn’t read you, or your thoughts at all.”

“Hmm,” you mumbled, throwing your legs over the side of the bed, “let’s go.”

As you settled into the cold, and sterile medical facility you were hooked up to a plethora of monitors, and a cacophony of devices beeped as they read your physical state.

You tuned out the words being spoken around you, zoning out and looking forward to your vital signs monitor. Your mind wandered to your last few thoughts in your previous reality, the desperation to come back, to see your estranged lover again. You couldn’t help but to feel disappointed, lamenting the fact that you’d found your way home, yet felt the ever present void in your heart where your Steve used to be.

“Y/N?” a voice asked you, and you glanced in its general direction. “What happened while you were out? What did you see? Did it work?” Bruce pelted you with questions.

“I don’t know if I’m ready to talk about it yet,” you sighed softly, bringing a hand up to your neck and rubbing it. “The watch worked though, I was definitely in other universes. I just couldn’t reach him. Bring him home. I failed.”

“Do you think he’s really out there?” Bruce whispered to Wanda hoping that you might not pick up on it.

“I’m… I don’t know. I just don’t know how likely it is that we’ll manage to find him,” she responded in a hushed tone. You bit back tears as she spoke, resuming your empty gaze on the pixelated green text of your heart rate on the monitor.

“I’m sorry, guys. I have to go back,” you interrupted. “I can’t give up on Steve yet. I know he wouldn’t give up on me.”

“Y/N, you could be gone for centuries before you find him, then return back here with no time passed at all, and possibly no Steve. You don’t deserve to take on all of that pain,” Wanda set a hand on your shoulder. “Steve would’ve wanted you to move on from him. To find happiness without him.”

“I can’t do that, Wanda. Without him I don’t even know who I am,” your voice trembled as you spoke. “He’s literally been my only tether through all of this.”

“I just don’t know that this is the best thing we could be doing. Sure, you’re physically fine, but it almost seems like you’re doing worse emotionally than you were before you left,” Bruce added.

“I’m not!” you sniffled before continuing. “I’m just tired from going to all those new places.”

Bruce and Wanda didn’t seem too convinced. “Don’t you guys believe in me? When have I let you down on a mission before? I’m gonna find him, okay? I’ll find him if it’s the last fucking thing I do,” you blubbered.

Wanda’s hand slid down your shoulder, and to the watch that was currently on your wrist.

“Don’t,” you uttered, swinging your opposite hand to grab onto your own wrist. You were aware that there was absolutely no way you could overpower her in taking the watch from you, but even in your minor hysterics, you were able to think fast enough to press the round button before the watch was able to be taken off of you.

You, and your wrist shook. Wrist shaking from the watch, and promise of sending you elsewhere, and you from a mixture of sobs and adrenaline. Though not the most ideal exit, it was an exit nonetheless.

You weren’t even sure if you cared that you were on good terms with your teammates anymore.

You just needed to be with Steve again.

#steve rogers x reader #captain america x reader #andy barber x reader #andy barber x you #marvel fanfiction #ABITRV

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guessimjoiningthespidermanfandom · 3 years

Text

Hell and Back Pt. 2

Peter Parker x bisexual!reader

Peter Parker x fem!reader

Peter Parker x black!reader

Peter Parker x villain!reader

Warnings: Language, hospital mentions, mentions of drug abuse, allusions to suicide, allusion to self harm, self deprecating thoughts, a gun, mentions of knives, mentions of the dead, anxiety, signs of abuse, abusive and toxic relationships, and fainting.

Word Count: 6.1k

Songs: Pleaser-Wallows, 505-Artic Monkeys, Sweater Weather- The Neighborhood, Daddy Issues- The Neighborhood, Paper Planes- M.I.A, We come running- Youngblood Hawke, Young dumb and broke- Khalid, Do I wanna know- Artic Monkeys, Break the Rules- Charli XCX

“I smiled, I know as much as we get into petty arguments or try to annoy each other on purpose but I’d go to hell and back for those girls. And that’s exactly what I was going to do.”

A/N: There might be some typos and grammatical errors sorry for those, I you want to be added to the Taglist just message me about or comment it. I’ll have a google form for it soon.

Series Masterlist Previous Part Next Part

When I saw my little sisters, that all went away. Sure I still called them a lot but nothing could compare to actually seeing them in person. Sapphire launched herself into my arms and I stumbled back a bit.

“I missed you too,” I said.

I hugged Aaliyah too. When I entered the apartment I heard voices. My dad’s and some feminine voice.

I walked in to find some woman who couldn't be older than 25 in my kitchen. Talking and laughing with my dad. I didn’t want to assume anything or start a scene so I just went into my room to catch up with my sisters.

We were talking about some kid who gave me a DMT pen once and I was tripping balls which I probably shouldn’t be talking about, but I want them to feel comfortable enough to come to me. Makes it easier to keep them safe.

Our dad opened the door and hung in the doorway.

“Hey… Y/N do you mind coming here for a sec?”

“Yeah sure…”

I stepped out of the room.

“Is something wrong?” It wasn’t often that he initiated a conversation that would end positively.

“No,no, not at all, I just want you to meet someone,”

When I entered the kitchen the same woman from before was still there. My dad walked over to her and wrapped his arm around her shoulders.

“This is my girlfriend, Camilla”

I knew it . I knew it! I was trying not to be hostile toward her every problem I had was towards my dad so I smiled and waved to her.

“Camilla this is Y/N,” he pointed to me.

“Well I’ll let y’all get acquainted,” He said before leaving the room.

I sat on the kitchen island and waited for her to say something first.

“Look, I would just like to put it out there that I’m not trying to replace your mom in anyway.”

“Thanks I appreciate it,”

“Also, are you okay now?” She asked in a low voice.

“Huh?” I questioned.

“Your dad said you ran away,” Of course he did “and I saw the news with your school at the Washington Monument.” So I guess she knew more about me then expected. Not surprised she was the one to ask me and not my so called dad.

“Thanks for your concern but I’m fine, and sorry to cut this conversation short but I’m drained.”

“Oh, okay, have a nice night,”

“You, too,”

I didn’t have time to think about anything. I just made it back to my room and face planted onto my bed. My whole being was sore including my brain. I didn’t have the energy to change my clothes, to shower, to think about my dad being a pathological liar or anything else that happened today.

I was awoken by my dad. I didn't know how long I slept but the sun was out. I can’t remember the last time I was able to sleep while the sun was up.

“Hey we’re going out, for family bonding and I want you there with us,”

Family.

We ain’t ever been a family before why start now. Is what I really wanted to say but I sucked it up because again I hadn’t seen my sisters in a while.

The movie was really boring. If we’re being honest.

I pulled Aaliyah and Sapphire aside as my dad and Camilla were deep in conversation.

“You know how I was staying at Wade’s house right?”

They both nodded.

“What did dad tell you about this,”

Sapphire just shrugged and Aaliyah was the one to post.

“I dunno he didn’t say much like usual he just kinda said you just left,”

I felt my jaw tightening as I processed her words, my fist clenching by my side.

“Oh, oh okay,” I breathed in through my nose and out through my mouth a couple times “Well I just want you to know I’d never leave y’all without a very good reason, and I never won’t come back,”

By the time we got back to the house it was around twelve since we watched another movie and went to a restaurant. Then got ice cream. This is the most money my dad could’ve possibly spent on me in a long time. I mean he didn’t because I didn’t get anything and bought my own ticket. I didn’t want him to be able to use the fact he bought me stuff against me. I’d gotten tired of the “after I’ll I’ve done for you,” excuse.

I couldn’t sleep. No matter what I tried I couldn’t sleep. I tried NyQuil, melatonin, and even tea. The tea really did more harm than good.

This was an extremely stupid thing to do so don’t follow my lead but I was bored.

I grabbed a lot of useless shit from the floor of my room and made my way to the roof. I poured hand sanitizer on it and set it on fire. Putting aside the fact that it was really weird the fire was oddly beautiful. I sat there watching it for a minute before stomping it out.

I was going to text my friend Carmen but I realized she was supposed to be asleep and I didn’t want to get her in trouble.

I ended up scrolling through Zillow for a while then that turned into me applying for like four jobs. In which turned into me making spamming multiple friends saying we needed to hang out.

While I was on Zillow there was a relatively cheap apartment in Queens. Which was close to my school. It kept drawing me in for some reason. I bookmarked the tab.

Before I knew it the sun was up. I figured if I couldn’t sleep I would go on a walk to the park.

When I got back to the complex everyone was still asleep except my dad who walked outside like he was waiting on me. He grabbed my arm, squeezing it tightly.

He basically told me I looked like a prostitute. I was running so my sports bra and leggings were actually pretty appropriate. He said that I was probably going out to fuck people and that’s where I always was. I opened my mouth to defend myself.

“Actually I was just going to the-“ I was cut off by a sharp sting on my cheek.

He fucking slapped me. Hard at that. He then grabbed my arm even tighter than before dragging me into the house.

I don’t know what hurt worse my face or that fact that I wouldn’t be able to blame him being drunk on all the times he’d hit me before. He was just an ass.

By the time I made it back to my room it felt like my body was burning itself from the inside out. My face was red and so was my arm from my elbow to almost my wrist. To try to cool myself down I took a cold shower and took some Tylenol.

I still couldn’t sleep but tonight it was because it was so hot. I really needed a fan in my room. It was already 6 so I just decided to get a head start at the school. Not without taking pictures of my bruises before covering them with green concealer and foundation. I wore a hoodie for good measure.

I felt dizzy and decided it was probably best not to skate at the moment and I’m 90% sure I fell asleep on the subway. Apparently we had an art project due which I had no idea existed in the first place so I wasn’t going to that class today. Even though I did truly love Ms. Kramer. I was just gonna skip and go to Bri’s class. Which just happened to be chemistry.

I wasn’t surprised Mr. Cobwell asked no question when I walked in. I ate lunch in his class a couple times, he was chill. He continued on talking about Quantum Theory.

I made Flash move from his seat next to Bri which he immediately did. I guess he was scared of me now.

“Hey,” I said, placing my non bruised side of my face on the desk.

“Hey,” She whispered back. “What class are you supposed to be in?”

“Art,”

“Why are you there? You love art,”

“I’m not feeling it today,”

“Alright,” she nodded.

“Lemme use your AirPods,”

She reached into her bag handing them over going back to taking notes. That didn’t last long.

“What ya watching?” She asked.

“Bad Girls Club,” I smiled knowing she liked this show.

“What season?”

“7,” I whispered because now I felt too weak to waste my energy on speaking. I placed the phone on my lap and she took the other AirPod and before I knew I class was over with Tasha throwing trash everywhere.

I figured I was feeling sick because my blood sugar was low or something so I drank some Apple juice at lunch and called it a day.

Now time for Physics. I hate physics. Why would science ever require so much math?

It was so hot. Like on the face of the sun, hot but I couldn’t take my hoodie off because I felt like I’d sweat my foundation off.

“Are you okay?” Peter asked me “You look pale,” I swear if he doesn’t learn to mind his business.

“I’m fine,” I told him, not sure if I was trying to convince him or myself, I gestured to his notebook. “Do your work,”

“Alright fine,” he said reluctantly, glancing at me once before getting back to writing whatever we were supposed to be doing down.

I pulled my hoodie back over my head and sat up in my seat about to try to do my work again. But it was so hot and I was so dizzy that I couldn’t focus.

The world began to swirl and I knew the switch in my brain was going to flip off. I just didn’t have time or enough energy to tell anyone.

When I woke up I was in a bed in the nurse's office and the first thing I noticed was I didn’t have my hoodie. Shit. I used to make fun of people for passing out because how does your own body clock out on you? Until it started happening to me like last year.

I went into the bathroom and sure enough the giant bruise on my cheek and arm were kinda visible.

Again shit.

I patted my forehead with a cold paper towel because the nurse’s bathroom actually had paper towels unlike all the others, before the nurse came back.

“Hello, Are you feeling okay?”

I nodded. She smiled down at me before giving me water and checking my temperature.

“You have a fever,” she said after looking down at the thermometer “We called dad to come and pick you up but we got no answer. Is there anyone else that can come and take you?”

I shook my head, not trusting my voice.

I drank some more of the water before speaking up.

“I have a friend who’s at this school she could maybe drop me off?”

“I’m not sure if that’s allowed,” she said.

“You know what? Go back to class, get your friend and come right back.”

I pushed off the bed and headed out of the nurses office surprised to find Peter sitting on the bench outside it.

“Are you okay?” He asked me again

“Yes I’m okay” I nodded. Apparently I wasn’t as okay as I thought because I almost tripped over my leg trying to move. But Peter immediately reached his hand out to stabilize me. And I don’t know why that made me as angry as it was but I said “I don’t need you to help,” harsher than I need to.

“Sorry,” I said calmly almost immediately after.

“It’s okay,” He said scratching the back of his neck.

“If you don’t mind me asking where’d these bruises come from,”

“I fell,” was all I said. He looked skeptical but that was all he was going to get, I didn’t need CPS all up in my business. That’s also payback for him lying to me about “cat scratches”.

“Can you do me a favor?” I asked.

“Yeah, anything,” he said.

“Can you go get Briana from Mr. Dell’s class for me?”

“Yeah I’ll be right back,” he said before sprinting down the hallway. I giggled at his giddiness. It was still extremely hot everywhere my body was tingling.

Bri ran towards me

“Oh my god are you okay,”

“I’m fine, I just need you to talk to the nurse with me real quick,”

She apparently didn’t have her car with her today so she was a no go.

“I’m sorry girl,” she said, pulling me into a hug.

“It’s okay, go back to class now,” I said.

“Alright feel better,”

I walked back out of the office to find none other than Peter still waiting there.

“So what happened?” He asked.

“Looks like I’m walking home,” I smiled sarcastically. “Yay,”

“I can walk you home,”

“No, thank you”

“I insist,” I laughed again

“I still think that word is funny,” I said.

“Okay, now let me walk you home,”

We were walking in no general direction. No one but MJ and Bri know my address and I’d like to keep it that way.

“Wait, you need food,” He claimed.

We ended up at this place called Delmar’s Deli. I’d passed it a couple times while walking home and during my less legal “hobby”. I really wasn’t hungry at all. I took all of like two bites from my sandwich claiming I’d take it to go before throwing it away. It wasn’t bad, it was quite good, actually I just wasn’t hungry.

“My aunt is a nurse at an emergency room, she can check you out,” I hate anything that's anything like a hospital at all brings terrible memories, but I didn’t want him to know where I lived so I agreed. I’d ditch him then.

It took us a while to get there but by the time we did I had to stop and catch my breath. He offered to walk me home and got me food. What a Spiderman thing to do. I’d say I had much solid proof to go on by now.

“Peter!” The gorgeous brunette woman came over to the waiting room “What are you doing here don’t you have school?”

“Yeah but my friend-“ When her eyes ghosted over to my face she cut herself off. “Oh my God are you okay,” she referred to my bruises “What happened to you?”

“Did Flash do this to her?” She asked Peter and I had to stifle a laugh at that. I wish he would try to lay a finger on me.

“No, she just told me she fell, we’re here cause she fainted and I don’t know if the school nurse is very capable of actually helping,”

Is this a new thing Peter just decides to randomly worry about me for no good reason and forces me into taking care of myself. Because I hate it.

“Oh, ok,” She nodded her head. “Grab one of those questionnaires over there,” She pointed to the sign in table. “Are your parents going to come too?” She asked and I shook my head.

She and Peter moved over to the side and started talking about something I had no interest in. I grabbed the questionnaire and sat on the edge of the closest seat.

1. What’s your age?

That’s easy 15.

2. Specify your race

African American of course.

3. Select your highest level of education

Some high school

4. What’s your marital status?

Single never married. Unless you count that un-ordained wedding I once had.

5. Specify your employment status

A student.

6. Have you ever been treated in an emergency room (specify age)?

Yes, as a child.

7. Have you ever been rushed to the hospital? If yes, do you remember why?

Okay wow. Yes.

I sat on the cold bathroom floor, vision blurry from tears forming in my eyes.

“Y/N, you okay in there?” I heard my brother ask after lightly rapping his fingers on the door.

“Yeah, I’m okay!”

No I wasn’t. I wasn’t okay at all. In fact I was the farthest thing from okay. I glanced down at my thighs, you could see cuts from the night before and scars peeking out from underneath my shorts. I was sobbing at this point.

“I’m so sorry,” I whispered. I wasn’t sure if it was for myself or to everyone I knew I’d hurt by this. I already had the headache. I was just waiting for the rest of the pills to kick in.

I was holding onto the sink for support when the left side of my body started to feel tingly. The whole situation felt hazy. I was shaking hard before I fell, taking almost everything on the sink with me.

My head hit the bathmat and I could feel my heart slowing and hear my breath become shallow. I heard the doorknob jingle and that was the last thing before a feeling of true bliss and peace took over my body.

I could hear screams and sirens and I knew I was in an ambulance. Slowly I awoke with wires all over my body and an IV in my wrist. My limbs were dead weight, I couldn’t move.

A single tear fell from my eye alerting me off my surroundings. I quickly came back to myself. I made up the excuse of a family emergency and left.

I ended up halfway across the city. Then in Brooklyn visiting a friend.

I knocked on the window of Aaron’s apartment. I could see Miles sitting on the couch.

“How’ve things been over here?” I asked once I was settled on the couch as well.

“Uh, pretty tame, and you?”

“There was that whole elevator stunt and I almost fucking died which was fun.”

“Forgot you never take anything seriously,” He rolled his eyes.

I laughed in response “Well one of us has got to be fun for us since it’s clearly not you,”

“In celebration of me not dying I’m making sundaes,”

“Alright,” He said leaning back on the couch.

“Hey uh, When’s Aaron coming back?” I asked, getting the whipped cream out of the fridge.

“I’m not sure,”

This is actually like really fucking dangerous. Like it could kill me. It’s just I was already in pain and had a headache. I also wasn’t thinking. I’d already made the sundaes. I turned around so Miles couldn’t see what I was doing before I- Okay I’m not going to do this. Get it together God you’re acting like an addict. The amount of people who’ve died from inhalants were insane. There it is again death.

“Drawn anything new lately?” I asked, wanting to get my mind off of the topic of death that seemed to be plaguing my brain lately.

“Some small sketches,”

I got the text that’d I been waiting for. I’d been talking to Aaron for the past few days. I’m not sure how Miles would feel about that. So I haven’t said anything.

But I got the text.

Staten Island Ferry 3pm

I immediately popped up from the couch.

“I have to go like right now, it’s an emergency,”

I sprinted towards the door almost running into the punching bag in front of me.

“Y/N-“

It’d been a week and things were looking up. I had a great day yesterday without the use of any drug. But nothing good ever lasts too long. I didn’t have to worry about that now. What I needed to worry about, was getting Peter to stop falling on his ass.

I tried not to laugh at him and failed.

“It’s not funny,” he said, pulling me down with him as I reached out to pull him up. Soon he was laughing too.

I felt a vibration in my pocket and saw that Aaron texted me.

hey the results from the search came in.

what???? don’t play with me I’m on my way right now.

“Uh hey I gotta go sorry,”

“No it’s fine I probably should get home too,” He pushed off the ground reaching down for me.

“Do you wanna do this again tomorrow?” He asked a hopeful glint in his eye once we were both on our feet.

“Yeah sounds nice,” I smiled.

“Okay,” He nodded.

“Okay,” I echoed heading off.

Ned was being fucking stupid.

“NO!” I slammed my hands down on the table “You don’t stab anyone especially if you plan on using bleach to clean up the blood. At least use vinegar and lemon,”

“Okay, jeez,” he said reeling back, “How would you do it then?”

Before I could say anything MJ spoke up

“You could just use a needle full of air in between their toes, Their heart would fail”

“Orrr,” I said spinning around on top of the table towards Ned. “You could overdose them on potassium and by the time the police get there the potassium in their blood is back at a normal level,”

“Yeah that works too,” MJ stated going back to whatever she was drawing.

“You guys scare me,” Ned muttered making me smile.

“Where’s Peter?” I asked and Ned pointed across the room.

There he was sitting by Liz. It was cute I knew about his little crush on her. I’m sure the whole school did. Glad it’s working out for him. However that did not stop the pain in my stomach.

I got up from the table because suddenly I did not want to be at school anymore.

“Where are you going?” MJ looked up at me.

I shrugged. In all honesty I had no I idea where I was going. Somehow I always end up at Wade’s house when I don’t know where I want to go. He wasn’t home but I had a key. I can’t remember if he gave it to me or I stole if we're being honest.

Clearly I hadn’t passed by a mirror in a while because damn. I look terrible.

My eyes were red and circled with a dark hue from lack of sleep. I still had a yellowing bruise on my cheek. I was pale. I looked to be on the verge of death.

I looked frail, like at any second I’d just fall apart.

It was so unfair. My bones dragged down my body. The pieces of my soul that were mined out and removed from my mind. There’s a hole leaving me forever longing and I cannot fill nor feel. Hiraeth, a beautiful word for a ugly feeling. longing for a home that I never truly had, a home in which I’d never return. I would like to drift to where my spirit lies. It’s in the eyes of you and me and everyone in between. Drifting on a small boat in the sea. Viridian. Yes! That's the place I would like to be, that's where my soul lies yes you see.

I kept punching his punching bag over and over again. Until I was on my back on the floor begging my lungs to allow air into them with Time (Is) by Solange playing on loop. Something put it into my head that I had to kill Vulture. I’d never directly killed anyone but that was gonna change. Having people killed or knowing someone was going to kill someone and not doing anything about isn’t killing anyone in my book, but I’m sure it would be in Spidey’s

That’s literally Liz’s dad though…

Okay maybe I’d just get him locked up. Great now I gotta be a snitch. That’s new. I showered not even caring about my hair now my curls were sticking to my face. I was freezing now though. I didn’t know whether to be glad that my body wasn’t on fire anymore or be upset that I was covered in goosebumps.

Wade’s laptop was sitting right there on his bed. I was only taking a shower but, I think I should be allowed to watch Netflix and he wouldn’t mind, I was already on his account anways.

After like 3 episodes into this random show there was a folder that was calling to me for some reason.

It’d be okay to take a sneak peek. I thought to myself.

I clicked on it and it was locked. I guessed the password in like three tries. He’s really gotta up his password game. It opened to multiple folders, one with my mom's name. Okay I had to click this then.

I opened it which opened to more folders one titled ‘In Case of My Death’.

Okay, okay cool my mother has had a video of what to do all if she died all along. This would’ve come in handy five years ago.

There were three videos with the names of myself and my sisters. I clicked on mine then paused it.

Then unpaused it again.

I couldn’t do it. Okay, yes I could. I played it again. As soon as I heard the beginning of the word “hi”. I shut the computer off. I couldn’t do this. Couldn't do it because I was weak, I couldn’t handle myself. I was stupid and weak and a fucking disappointment. Guess my dad had been right all these years. I knew there was always some truth to the words he spoke only a matter of time until I started acknowledging it.

I don’t remember coming home to the apartment. And I definitely don’t remember writing all over the walls of my dad’s room. But I had a marker in my hands and it looked like a toddler had gone to town.

Holy Shit

He was actually going to murder me, in cold fucking blood. I trashed, the living room area, his room, and then mine. I was not coming home tonight. Looks like I’d need to find a new home now. At this point that sounded like a pretty solid plan.

I text my sisters a quick text ‘stay at grandma’s house tonight dad is going to pissed like Super Sayian mode’ before grabbing my go-bag which was: a bag of the essentials, like hygiene a couple shirts, shorts, hoodies, pants, and of course the flash drive can't forget the flash drive.

The flash drive that’s driving me crazy. I’d yet to open it though. I knew I was crazy because I did all this while fucking sobbing.

I wandered around for hours. Making my way to Brooklyn, Manhattan, Harlem, AND actual New York City.

Somehow I still ended up at Olivia’s door at the end of the day. I honestly believe we were soulmates. Most people don’t know you get many soulmates in a lifetime. I think Olivia and I would be the karmic kind. A karmic relationship is meant to help you grow, but it is never meant to last—it's often playing out a bad experience from a past life. I’m guessing I hadn’t grown yet because here I was.

She opened the door after a second. I’m surprised she did because I used our special knock so I knew she knew it was me.

“I can’t fucking do this anymore,” I screamed in her face.

“You're the one going off and being secretive and shit, like you’re scared I’m gonna hurt you or something,” she yelled walking up the stairs.

I followed after her,

“Maybe you would hurt me. I don’t know you are insane,” I said, tears brimming my eyes.

“Just because you have fucking daddy issues, doesn’t mean you have to carrying them into every part of your life,”

“I have daddy issues?” I screamed soon turning into me choking on a laugh making an unhinged noise “Oh, I have fucking daddy issues, now? Oh, okay,” I nodded.

“Your parents didn’t even fucking want you,” I pointed at her. “At least my mom stuck around before she died,”

“You’re an asshole, you know that?”

“Yeah well right back at you,”

“You’re fucking psychotic! Literally you’re so much like your dad and you don’t even know it, You’re trying to please him and he doesn’t give two shits about you, Wake up Y/N! Wake up.”

“I’m hard on you because I love you so much,” She claimed, but her love was suffocating.

“Oh yeah? I asked “Well i don’t know how much more of this ’love’ I can take,”

“Fine then,” She screamed.

“Fine,” I said before she slammed the door in my face leaving me standing out in the cold crying.

That wasn’t even the worse we’d said to each other. It was the first but not the last time we’d break up either. I do believe we loved each other though in our own twisted way. Well at least I know I loved her.

“Hey,” She said softly as she could sense I was due to break at any second. My cheeks were probably tear stained.

“Hey,” I whispered back.

“Are you okay?” She asked.

“No,” I shook my head. One thing I liked about her is I didn’t have to fake it around her, because masking my real emotions was so draining. At least I didn’t have to do it with everyone.

“Wanna talk about it?”

“No,”

“Okay,” she said softly “My parents aren’t home, so you don’t have to worry about them,” not surprised.

I nodded before she grabbed my hand bringing me inside.

“I missed you,” she said stroking my hair as I laid on her bed, my head in her lap.

“I missed you too,” I wasn’t lying my head drifted to her from time to time. It wasn’t that I wanted to get back together I just missed her presence.

She smiled sadly at me running her finger over the bags on my eyes.

“Heavy is the head that wears the crown,” She quotes.

“Yeah well, ’m not queen or princess and definitely don’t have a crown, so we don’t gotta worry ‘bout me,” I said.

“You’re a princess to me,” I gave a genuine yet tired smile at that.

“You can go to sleep, it’s okay,” She said.

That was the first time I was actually able to fall asleep and without medicine or having to go on a walk or do anything really.

I woke up in the bed alone only to find Olivia sitting at her kitchen island eating spaghetti.

She smiled when she saw me coming into view.

“Sleep well?” She asked.

“Yeah surprisingly,” How long had I been asleep for I wondered.

“It’s 10 pm,” She said, still being able to read me.

I made my way over to her and sat across her.

“So what’s really going on with you miss Y/N?” She questioned.

I shrugged “I don’t know, nothing,”

“Are you trying to convince me or yourself? Cause I’m not buying,”

I explained to her how my dad was being weird and how I wanted to move out now. How I had pretty much vandalized the house. How I found the video of my mom. Just everything. Well maybe not everything I didn’t tell her about Vulture because I feel like she’d try to do something and I didn’t want her to get hurt.

“Oh wow, damn... holy shit. Are you gonna watch your moms video?” She asked. Huh I hadn’t thought about that.

“I mean of course I will, yeah,” I nodded “Probably, I don’t know I’m scared,”

“Wouldn’t you rather just push the fear back and watch then wonder the rest of your life what it says.”

I sighed. Can't argue with that logic.

“I’m assuming you came here because you need a place to stay?” She said.

“Yes, I need a place to stay just for a while but I don’t want it to seem like I’m just using you I can find somewhere else,”

“Now it’s fine stay as long as you need but my dad gets back at the end of the month and we both know he doesn’t like you,” She chuckled at the last sentence and I laughed too.

I was on the ferry heading towards Staten Island now. I knew the sale was for these weird alien shits but that's pretty much all I knew. I figured I’d sort of “out bid” the buyers then get rid of everything. By outbid I mean straight up steal. Some guy in a white pickup truck is officially my target. Thorn was still on hiatus. Meaning no knives unless you count the pocket knife I always had on me, no suit. I did have a trejo though, you know just in case. I couldn’t help my mind from drifting to Pop Smoke’s “I got it on me”. I let out a small laugh.

I was hiding behind some car waiting for a crack in the plan to slip in.

That was until Spiderman showed up. It’s like he had a sixth sense to ruin all of my plans.

Shit

Well abort mission. Just as I started walking around to get to the side of the boat. The van I was next to had Vulture literally coming out of it. I knew it’d looked familiar.

I made it up to the top deck looking down on everything unfolding. So a quick rundown, the FBI was here, meaning Tony Stark or someone with government clearance probably did something because I highly doubt that Spiderman, the Spiderman that I’ve seen hit a window like a bird while swinging, had any government clearance.

See now I was looking to find a good time to make my escape. That was until that purple alien shit started spewing stuff beams of light through the ship. And fuck, I look away for one second and the new Shocker guy was gone. I turned around and saw he was running in another direction. I chased after him the rubber of my sneakers squeaking on the deck.

I jumped down onto Shocker’s back sending us both to the floor before he pushed me off. I was definitely going to be sore tomorrow and I’m pretty sure I heard something pull in my leg.

He jumped off onto the Vulture and I knew I couldn’t do anything anymore. Not like I was just going to shoot them down in public. I saw the light shooting down the middle of the ferry. I was gonna make a run for it but the loud squeal noise was so loud I fell over. Soon I was slung back into what I think was a bench not entirely sure I just knew it hurt like a bitch.

I’m pretty sure I feel unconscious for like 30 seconds.

But that was enough because the boat had already split in half and I couldn’t get to the deck or a lifeboat. However Spider-Man was frantically trying to get it together.

I was trying to be hopeful because everything was looking up, as the parts of the ship got closer together but I think we all know the saying ‘what goes up must come down’

Over the ringing in my head I could assume that things were fixed because people were cheering. One thing that comes from cheering is movement and if I learned anything from the elevator it’s that moving in a very unstable metal death box is not a good idea.

The ship was falling apart again until it wasn’t. It was pushed back together by I could only assume would be our government clearance guy Tony Stark. I looked out the window and yep there he was.

As soon as I got on solid ground I called my sisters.

“Hiii!” I exclaimed. “Where are you, are you okay?”

“Yes we’re fine, and where at grandma’s house like you told us to go to where else would we be,” I could almost hear the eye roll in Liyah’s voice.

“Okay little Miss attitude stay there until I can feel everything out with dad,”

“Alright,”

“Okay I love you guys,” I said, getting a small “love you too” from Sapphire.

“I know,” was the response I got from Liyah. I almost gasped the audacity of this child.

“Say it back,”

“Say it back,” She mocked, evoking laughter from both sides of the call.

“Okay love you too byeeee,” She said hanging up.

I smiled, I know as much as we get into petty arguments or try to annoy each other on purpose but I’d go to hell and back for those girls. And that’s exactly what I was going to do.

Taglist:

@tomdiddlyumptious

#peter parker #peter parker fanfiction #peter parker x reader #reader x peter parker #Peter Parker x Vigilante!Reader #peter parker x fem!reader #peter parker x y/n #peter parker x black!reader #peter parker x villian!reader #poc reader x peter parker #peter parker x bisexual!reader #peter parker x bi!reader #peter parker x thorn #thorns prick #spiderman x villian #mcu series #mcu x reader #peter parker x you #spiderman x thorn

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iwantitiwriteit · 4 years

Text

Slow Burn: Act I - Part 3

The Secret Session

Pairing: Chris Evans x Famous!Reader

Summary: There’s a secret audience member at your acoustic show.

Warnings: Profanity

Notes: Before you dive in, get in the zone with the moodboard + music specially curated to go with this part! Full of acoustic jams by a couple of my favorite artists. Read the previous part here.

The calm before the storm. That’s what the time before a performance is like for you. You politely demand minimal talking of anyone in the room, unable to help getting lost in thought before a show, often reflecting on the last couple years. Today is no different.

Honey, your song is on the radio!

Oh ‘cos you’re ‘famous’ now, you think you’re hot shit?

It’s not like you don’t have the money.

5 weeks at number 1 and counting!

I can’t believe how naive you’re being.

I can’t believe how jealous you’re being.

And the award goes to…

You won!

I thought you’d be happy for me.

I can’t do this anymore...

“So… that hangover of yours must be serious.”

You bring your eyesight from its fixed spot on the floor in front of you to look at Jimi. “What do you mean?”

“I mean you’re so lost in your thoughts, you didn’t hear me say ‘pancakes’.”

You whip your head around like a madwoman. “Pancakes?! Where?”

“Down girl. There are none. You fiend.”

“Then why mention it? Getting my hopes up like that…”

“‘Cos they’d go reeeealllly good with this obviously expensive, gourmet coffee someone named ‘CE’ sent you.”

“What?” You rush over to Jimi’s side and take the note from her hand.

“Mmhmm... cryptic ass note too. But I’m gonna guess not to you.”

Roses are red, coffee is brown. Boston’s known for tea parties, and I for putting my foot in my mouth. Forgive me? -CE

‘Brown’ and ‘mouth’? What a way with words, this guy. He really went through the trouble, though…

“Wanna tell me what you got up to last night? As your manager, I should know.” Jimi tilted her head and narrowed her eyes at you.

You cringed at the thought of recounting last night’s events. “Not really.” Throwing the note over your shoulder, you began inspecting the extravagant bouquet. “And I’m not hungover by the way. Just feeling— ugh, you know how I get before shows.”

“Nuh uh, sis. Now I’m pulling best friend rank. Hungover or not, you crept ya ass back into the hotel room close to 3 am KNOWING you had a show the next day, get sent coffee and flowers with cheesy apology notes by obviously rich randos, and on TOP OF IT ALL, are about to be away from me for what? 3 months?”

“4 months,” you reluctantly corrected her.

“4 MONTHS! And you REALLY THINK you’re not about to tell me what the hell happened last night? What do you think this is— Pretty Little Liars? Bitch, spill.” Jimi’s right… manager AND best friend. She deserves the tea… Why’d I give her this much power?

“Well…” Jimi takes a seat as you pace around, beginning to tell her about meeting Chris the night before.

“Chris Evans, Chris Evans? Like Chris motherfucking Evans?”

“Girl, yes!” you confirm.

You tell her about your stupid, potentially offensive joke.

“Ooooff. I’m not surprised, though, that’s on brand for you.”

“Ugh, I know— hey!”

You tell her how Anthony and Scott were obviously trying to set you up, and how Anthony was not helping the awkwardness you already established.

“Why, though??”

“Your guess is as good as mine.”

You tell her how things eventually turned around, you and Chris caught a little vibe, and that you were so sure he was flirting with you. How genuine he seemed, and how dreamy his eyes were, and—

“Wait a min—”

“Let me finish!”

Finally, you told her how you’d accidentally read Anthony’s text chain with Chris, and saw what Chris really thought of you.

“Well, damn.”

“I’m saying!” You breathe out exasperatedly as you sit down in front Jimi, leaning your head on her knee.“It's not that I thought we’d ride off into the sunset together or anything, but I just thought I’d read him as genuine. I don’t know… with all that’s happened the last few months, my judgment could really use a win.”

“Oh honey, I know. But what did I tell you? You—”

“We’re ready for you!” Saved by the stage manager.

“Looks like your stern talking to is gonna have to wait until after the meet and greet.”

“Immediately after. Have fun out there hun. Snatch some wigs!”

——————————————————————————

You didn’t see it, but last night Chris saw you enter the party. His breath hitched at the sight of you, dressed in all white, hair like a kinky-curly halo around your head. An actual angel. Somewhat dressed down from the other ladies in the party, but clearly confident and comfortable in your own skin, made you stand out to him. His mesmerization was interrupted by voices calling out in the distance. It was a couple of the younger actor boys, and he watched you chat with them.

Chris looked away when his phone dinged indicating he received a text. It was from Mackie, asking if he was ok. Can I catch a break? He exchanged texts, but wanted to return his gaze so badly to the sneakered beauty that caught his eye. When he looked up, you were gone, and he panicked a little. He finally found you outside on the rooftop patio, dancing provocatively… with Scott?

Chris made his way over to you, Scott, and Mackie. He admired the way you talked expressively about who-knows-what, but your animated faces amused him. When he got to you all, introductions were made; you’re an actress, soon making your film debut alongside his brother and friend. He tries to make small talk with you, but somehow finds himself being joked on for his own film debut, and he’s slightly returned to his sullen mood. I’m not in the mood for this. It’s always too good to be true, huh?

Alone with you at the bar, though, something happens, you change his mind— or rather confirm and further his initial intrigue. The two of you talk, laugh, and dance with each other for the better part of the evening, often catching yourselves gazing smittenly at the beautiful stranger opposite of you. He thinks that you're funny, smart, and confidently awkward. Chris appreciates your realness and was never more glad he came out despite his previously funky mood.

Unfourtunately, there was another change, a sour one. You’d seen Chris’ blind judgments of you. FuuuuUUUUUUcccckkk. He’d sent those texts before he’d even met you, ignorant to you being the musician that his brother and friend were trying to set him up with— they’d done a good job of making sure of that after he expressed his disinterest. But you didn’t know that, and believed that what he texted was truly what he thought of you after enjoying each other’s company all night.

Chris was embarrassed to say the least. He went to the bathroom to hide his shame. I finally, FINALLY hit it off with someone, and possibly blew it because I just HAD to choose this ONE time to be colorful in my word choice. I gotta make this right.

As quickly as he could, he’d gotten together a demonstration of remorse: a beautiful bouquet of roses and some gourmet coffee, a call back to the quips you shared last night, sent to your green room. He wasn’t sure what to say on the note, but remembering how much of a jokester you are, he went the cheesy, comical route, and prayed it went over well. Chris could’ve left it at that, but no, my curiosity had to get the best of me.

Just like you hadn’t seen him watching you last night, you hadn’t seen him watching you today. Today, however, he’s not the only one watching you. This isn’t qualified as stalking, is it? God, I hope not. Appropriately anxious and tucked in the furthest corner of the small, but packed venue, clad in a baseball cap, hoodie, and sunglasses, Chris heavily reconsidered his spur of the moment decision of coming to see your acoustic performance. Any chance of leaving was now gone as the lights dimmed and the presenter came on stage.

“In the last 2 years following the release of her debut album, today’s artist has taken music by storm! She’s had a #1 song in the country for 10 consecutive weeks— graced the covers of Rolling Stone and Vogue— top-billed major music festivals like Lollapalooza and Coachella. She’s even cleaned up at the Grammys this year and then gave the most talked about performance.” Damn… do I really live under a rock? “iHeartRadio, give a warm welcome to…”

Applause erupted as you joined your band on stage, taking your spot behind the microphone. You greeted the crowd with a shy smile and introduced the first song. “This… is ‘Stroke’.” The crowd erupts again around Chris, all in on what’s in store, leaving him the only one in the room unsure of what to expect.

Chris is mesmerized by your voice and amused by your quirky dance moves. But he feels conflicted, knowing that similar moves were done with him last night on the dance floor. When you danced together, it had felt like the two of you were in your own little world, but seeing you onstage sharing some of that with an entire audience made him feel a little… insignificant.

Your lyrics are smart, raw and moving and the instrumentation is captivating even in its stripped back state. Chris doesn’t think he’s ever heard music like yours before. He’s surprised by the subtly aggressive and sexual nature of it, considering how awkward and goofy and cute you were with him. However, he loves watching your outright confidence, your assertiveness, in action on stage. Wow, she’s fucking amazing!

“... thank y’all! Um… this next one is a cover of a song I’m sure you know and love.” The guitarist starts the iconic riff of Aaliyah’s ‘Are You That Somebody?’. Chris is taken back to hearing this song at many parties in his younger years where he mindlessly *and drunkenly* danced to the upbeat production. But hearing you sing it today, a little slower and a lot more vulnerable, the lyrics hit him differently.

“Oh boy, see I’m trusting you with my heart, my soul

I probably shouldn’t let you but if I

If I let you know

You can’t tell nobody, I’m talkin’ ‘bout nobody

I hope you’re responsible

Boy I gotta watch my back, 'Cause I’m not just anybody”

He’s reminded of your comments last night.

“Don’t you ever feel like you can’t tell people’s intentions? Like, you can’t tell if someone wants to be around you for you or… for what they think they’ll get in return. It’s just easier to stay in your own, comfortable bubble sometimes. I don’t know…”

She probably thinks I was trying to take advantage of her. God, I’m so stupid sometimes!

At the end of the set, there’s a round of deserving applause and cheers for you, and you beam at the crowd, thanking them. Chris can’t help but feel strangely proud of you; he barely knows you, but can tell you love what you do and give your all to it. He admires that.

When the lights come up and the presenter joins you on stage, Chris takes that opportunity to slip out early so as not to be caught in the rush of everyone leaving, risking him getting recognized. He gets his phone out to let his driver know he’s coming down and to meet him around the corner, hoping this will keep them from tipping off paparazzi. He then opens his music app to download all your music. It’s official: I’m a fan.

——————————————————————————

“Alright everybody, if you have tickets for the meet and greet… “ the presenter gives announcements as you leave the stage. Being the attentive performer you are, you noticed a tall, enigmatic audience member leave early. Normally you would’ve gently called them out, but something stopped you. A familiarity of the figure, the stature, the walk.

Your breath catches in your throat at the thought of who it could be. You start towards the green room to prepare for the meet and greet, although your swirling thoughts cause you to make little to no strides in that direction. What if it is Chris? Why would he come today? Was he really sorry? Or was he just bored and looking for a good laugh?

Adrenaline rushes you and you head in the direction of where the figure had gone. You scan the room and spot them, stomp up behind them, ready to have some words.

“Hey! HEY!” You reach and yank their hoodie off, “WHAT’D YOU THINK OF THE show…” your voice trails off at the sight of a toupee hanging in the pulled down hood, and the figure turns around. Shit.

“¡¿Qué mierda estás haciendo?!” The Spanish speaking stranger is loud, bald, and clearly pissed.

“Lo siento,” you offer with a sheepish smile and shrug, then turn on your heels and scurry off, slightly embarrassed by the scene you’d caused.

“What the hell was that?” Jimi asked with wide eyes. “Not what I meant when I said ‘snatch some wigs’!”

“I thought that was Chris…”

“You thought an extremely famous, A-list actor, who barely flirted with you last night, and clearly doesn’t think very highly of you, risked pestering paps and mobbing fans to go out of his way to come to your set today?”

“Well, when you put it like that…”

“And if it was? What were you gonna do?”

“I… didn’t think that far.”

“You didn’t think at all. Listen, I get that you’re hurt—“

“I’m not hurt! Ok… That’s not me. I don’t get hurt.”

Jimi sighs, softening her eyes and speaks at you with tough love and concern. “Whatever it is you’re feeling, you can’t let him or any other industry guy get in your head like this. Your career’s finally taking off like you wanted, and your personal life is less in shambles than it was a while ago. If you want everything to continue going in the right direction, you gotta get focused! You’ve got a movie role to slay! And many more amazing opportunities waiting for you after that because you made it all happen. I want you to remember that this next chapter is about focusing on what’s right for you, professionally and personally. Do NOT bring in the bullshit from the last chapter.”

It’s your turn to sigh. “But, I—“

“Aht-aht! No excuses. Are we clear?” You simply nod because there’s not much you can say. All you can do is mentally make a promise to yourself to not let any guy get you besides yourself, that you will be willing and ready for great things to happen to you. Jimi’s right… again! Dammit, I hate when she’s right.

Part 4

#chris evans fanfiction #chris evans fluff #chris evans imagine #chris evans x female reader #chris evans x poc!reader #chris evans x reader #chris evans x woc #chris evans x y/n #chris evans x you #slow burn series #chris evans one shot #chris evans series

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winnipegpatty · 5 years

Text

We’re Fatally Flawed | one | s.m. series

a/n: thanks to @fourtristattoos for helping me with some conceptual things. ily boo you are so good!

warnings: language

if you’re interested in the music

“Hey man, my name’s Travis Clark. I sing for We the Kings? I hear you have a band in Toronto?”

“That, uh, yeah that’s right,” Shawn stuttered.

“We want you to play with us on tour.”

Shawn stuttered on his side of the phone. He hadn’t heard that right, clearly. “You what?” He said like a fucking idiot.

Is this what a big break felt like?

At the young age of twenty-three, Shawn Mendes hadn’t don’t much with his life. After graduating high school, Shawn had done what a good kid does, and went to college. He came out two years later, with an associates degree in business. Since, he’s done very little that would make his parents proud. He only went to college to oblige them in the first place, but now, three years out of college, he had nothing to show for it. Shawn wasn’t lazy or anything. He wasn’t one of those kids that came home from college and then moved into their parents basement and did nothing with their life. Shawn just didn’t love business. He didn’t love school. He loved music. And music was the only thing he could imagine doing, no matter how unrealistic or unlikely it seemed.

Shawn wasn’t completely ungrateful for college though. If it hadn’t been for those two years he would have never met Mandy Stein. A beautifully tender hearted person that he now could call his own. They’d been dating for almost four years now. Mandy was starting her first year as a kindergarten teacher this year. She was so excited, and Shawn knew she was made for teaching. Her kind heart and her caring demeanor was perfect for molding young minds.

So while Mandy was preparing her first lesson plans and decorating her classroom, Shawn was in the garage of his and Mandy’s small home practicing with his band, Terminal. The band was Shawn’s entire life. He’d somehow managed to find some of the most incredible people who were willing to go on the journey alongside him. Mike, Zubin, Eddy, and Dave all made up the band along with Shawn, and aside from Mandy they were the most important people in his life right now. Terminal had been doing good lately, after two years of playing to nothing but empty rooms or friends, they’d finally seemed to hit some momentum.

They’d most recently been asked to been asked to open for a handful of bands that were big in Toronto. It was good exposure, for a band so unknown. Punk music wasn’t exactly the most popular in Canada either, but Shawn couldn’t find it in himself to make the music people would want to hear. He had to make what he wanted to hear. What he was inspired to make. Even if it meant that he wasn’t going to have the fame and success that he truly craved. Even if it meant he never got to play in front of a full stadium.

Tonight they had a show at the Scotiabank arena. It was the first of a three night run in front of the band We the Kings. When Travis Clark had personally contacted Shawn a couple months ago, Shawn hadn’t believed him. Thought the phone call was some cruel prank, but Travis was in fact very serious. He’d heard Terminal’s debut EP through a friend, and he wanted their band to open for them. It was insane, and the craziest thing the band had ever had the opportunity to do by a long shot. Tonight they’d be playing in front of over 15,000 people. The band was collectively losing their shit.

It was the opportunity of a lifetime. Over the next five days, Terminal would have exposure to over 40,000 new people who had most likely never heard their music before. People who had no idea that they were still practicing in a soundproof garage. In the past few weeks, Shawn had been doing everything he could to up their social media game with the hopes of attracting new fans after the upcoming shows. His sister Aaliyah had helped him with some special instagram layout or something that she said would catch people’s eyes. He didn’t know much about that, but he trusted her.

“You’re coming tonight, right?” Shawn asked Mandy through the phone, voice filled with excitement.

The band was at the arena now, getting ready for soundcheck. Shawn couldn’t even think, it was so surreal.

“Babe, you know I’ve got to get my classroom ready tonight.”

Shawn bit his lip, minding the thin black ring on his lip. “Oh yeah, but you’ll make it to one of the other shows right?”

“I’m not sure yet,” Mandy’s voice came through.

Shawn tried not to feel the little pings of disappointment that were coming for his heart.

“I’m just so busy, Shawn,” Mandy added. “School starts in a week and a half. And I’m nowhere near ready.”

Shawn nodded, “Yeah that’s okay. Get lots of work done tonight. I’ll see you at home?”

Mandy smiled into the phone, “We can celebrate.”

Shawn flicked his tongue over his lips, “Yeah okay. I gotta go now, we’re gonna sound check.” Shawn sucked in a breath, “Fuck...we’re gonna soundcheck. I think I’m going to cry, Mandy. I’m a fucking pansy.”

“No, you’re just living your dream. It’s okay to be emotional about it.” She smiled, “I love you, Shawn. You’re gonna kill it.”

“Love you too.”

___

“FUCKKKK!” Zubin yelled from backstage. “This is really fucking happening isn’t it?” He looked too Shawn hopefully.

Shawn nodded, “It is. Fuck, I don’t think I can breathe. I’ve never been this nervous before.”

Zubin clapped Shawn on the back, laughing maniacally. “We’re gonna tear the stage up. Toronto isn’t gonna know what hit ‘em.”

“Exactly!” Eddy piped in.

“Okay, I just...let’s go over it again okay?” Shawn nervously twirled the thin band on his right ring finger. “Opening with Mess of Me, then Voices. I’ll introduce the band. Then we’ll sing Native Tongue. Terminal, Take My Fire, and then we’ll close with Bullet Soul.”

“We got it man,” Mike hollered. “We’ve been practicing for weeks. Stop worrying. Let’s just enjoy it, yeah?”

Shawn wasn’t sure if he could actually stop worrying, but he did his best to just breathe.

A man with a headset came up to them, “You guys are on. The lights will come up as soon as the video fades out.”

They all hustled onto stage and Shawn could feel his entire body vibrating as he placed his hands on his guitar, ready to strike his first chord. Thirty seconds later, the lights rise and the arena erupts in a chorus of screams. Shawn starts the riffs of Mess of Me and on the second go around Zubin joins in. “I am my own affliction,” Shawn’s voice comes through the speakers like smooth honey, and the crowd screams for them. “I am my own disease.”

The chorus crashes in and the boys come behind him singing a chorus of oh’s before Shawn voice goes raspy, and he starts singing the chorus at the top of his lungs. He’s never felt more alive than he does in this moment. He thinks back to his happiest memories, and there is nothing that compares to this moment in time. He thinks he finally knows what it means to be alive. Nerves a thing of the past, Shawn jumps on the stage, guitar in hand, and owns the performance like he was born to do exactly this.

Mess of Me segways easily into Voices, and it all just feels so right. The rush of adrenaline Shawn gets as he walks down the catwalk with his microphone was unreal. People, who minutes ago had no idea who he was, are reaching for him like he holds the fucking world in his hands. It’s addictive. Shawn bends down reaching out to touch a girls hand who screams at him as he sings, “And I’ve got a army of voices in my head.”

He looks towards the other side of the catwalk and catches eyes with a person who’s actually singing the words like they know who they are. And if Shawn thought performing to a hyped up crowd was cool before, he knew now had just a sliver of what it could feel like with a stadium full of people singing back to you. He needed to know what that felt like.

Voices came to a head when Zubin shouted the last few words and the music cut out. Shawn ran back up the catwalk back to his mic stand.

“Hello Toronto!” Shawn screamed into the microphone. The crowd explodes with screams and shouts and clapping. “You’re looking extra beautiful tonight. It is amazing to finally meet all of you lovely people. My name is Shawn. Zubin is here on guitar,” Zubin played a sick guitar riff that had Shawn’s ears humming. “Give it up for Eddy on the keys,” Eddy followed Zubin in a similar fashion. “And Mike is smashing it on the drums tonight, eh?” Mike killed a drum beat before Shawn screamed into the microphone, “And we are Terminal, this next song is Native Tongue.”

___

“Celebratory drinks?” Zubin asked as the boys packed up their guitars and packing them into the van they’d come in.

“Hell yes!” Shawn roared.

Piling into the van, they headed to a nearby bar. It was already past midnight, but fuck it. When the opportunity of a lifetime presents itself, you fucking celebrate.

We the Kings had killed it on stage, and the concert was just amazing. Coming off stage had been disorienting to say the least. Shawn was covered in sweat, his heart pounding, his ears ringing, and his entire body vibrating from adrenaline. The first step into back stage was like being hit by a wall of silence. The ringing in his ears intensified and his body suddenly felt like it was in an overwhelming overdrive with no real output. After sometime, the feeling eventually subsided and Shawn was able to return to life. But he’d definitely never experienced an adrenaline rush quite like that before. He was willing to bet it was addictive.

At the bar they each got a round of shots before picking their drinks of choice. They sat at a high top table, discussing the feelings the night had induced in all of the. Each member going over things they’d never forget. Moments that were worth reliving over and over again. Somewhere in the early hours of the morning, a girl walked over to the group, drink in hand.

“Hey, you’re the guys from Terminal right?” She slurred slightly. “Just saw you tonight.”

Shawn smiled, “Yeah that’s us.”

Fuck they were already being recognized? This is what dreams feel like, right?

“You guys, were so amazing tonight.”

The blonde girl leaned heavily against the table, coming closer to Shawn. She smelled like coconut.

“Well, thanks.” Shawn smiled. “Glad you liked it.”

She pressed into Shawn’s side and whispered, “I loved it.”

Shawn felt a rush heat run up his neck and onto his cheeks as he looked at the other boys who were just staring at the spectacle.

“Well it was nice to meet you.”

“Yeah, it was,” she looked at each of the band members before turning back to Shawn, looking like she wanted to completely devour him.

She stumbled away, and Zubin whistled at Shawn. “Dude Mandy’s got some competition.”

Shawn rolled his eyes, “You know there isn’t anyone but Mandy. Not for me anyway.”

Zubin looked at Eddy making a special kind of eye contact before Eddy laughed. Shawn ignored them in favor of grabbing another bear from the bar.

It wasn’t until after three that Shawn stumbled into their home. He slammed the door a little too loud, cringing at the loud echo in his skull. Tomorrow morning wasn’t going to be fun. He walked into the kitchen, cursing when he stubbed his toe against the island. He shuffled around looking for the light, before finally finding it, illuminating the room in a warm glow. He quickly grabbed a glass, filling it with water, and swallowing down some pain killers. Turning off the light, he stumbled down the hallway, into the bedroom.

Shawn pulled off his shirt and jeans before falling into his bed with a huff.

“Shawn?” Mandy whispered, rolling over. “What time is it?”

“It’s almost 4 babe, go back to sleep.”

“How was the concert?” She mumbled instead.

“It was good, babe. Now go back to sleep.”

She turned away from him in the bed, and Shawn pushed himself up against her back, arms wrapping around her torso.

“We were supposed to celebrate,” was the last thing Shawn heard before he slipped into a deep sleep.

tagging: @fourtristattoos @peacedolantwins2 @rosecth @unhealthyobsessionwithmarvel

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#shawn mendes fic #shawn mendes imagine #shawn mendes #shawn mendes x reader #imagine #fic #fanfic #shawn mendes fanfic #shawn mendes writing #my writing #mine #writing

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cncoluv · 5 years

Note

Omg just think about a road trip with Joel. Cue heart eyes .

Road Trip with Joel Pimentel

Warnings: None, major fluff ahead

Sorry it took so long but @babyyynatty I hope you will enjoy it.

Joel x Reader

You and your childhood best friend Joel, whom you always had a crush on, but never pushed it because you didn’t want to ruin a great friendship, were planning something. You both wanted to take a trip down to Florida. You had never been, but Joel had. You had completely forgotten about it because it was about seven months ago that both of you had talked about it. When you first mentioned it, Joel wanted to show you around and be a tour guide. Currently, it was one week after the CNCO tour. You were at home in your apartment and you get a text from Joel, ‘Hey, can you meet me at Central Park in 15?’ You jump up out of your bed from watching Netflix and eating your ice cream in a panic. You clean up your house in 10 minutes and rush to put clothes on. You chose a yellow off the shoulder crop top that had red flowers, a white pair of pants with yellow ankle strapped heels. He was texting you during the time and telling you where in Central Park he wanted to meet you.

You were extremely excited. You felt like you haven’t seen him in years because of your work schedule and their tour schedule being so different. I was about 5:25 PM when you rushed out of your apartment. You knew it would only take 5 minutes to get there. You ran down there, even though your feet were hurting. When you got there, you were trying to catch your breath. All of a sudden, you feel someone hug you from behind. You smiled, “Hey, Joelito.” It seems as if he doesn’t want to let you go. You turn around to see him. You felt him slowly let you go and you smile. He pulls you in for another hug, gently holding your back. When you both pull away, you both chorus, “It’s so good to see you again.”

You walk to a nearby bench, sit down, and talk to him. He asked if you remember the conversation of wanting to take a trip to Florida and you nod, “Yeah I do.” He responds, “Well, we are gonna go now. Let’s go back to your place and get your things.” You get excited but then you think about your job. He seemed to notice your hesitation, “I already talked to your manager. She said that it was okay to take a week off; it would go as your paid leave. I got her number a while back at the Christmas party, before you ask.” You stop because you were about to ask him how he got her number, but when he explains, you calm down and agree. Excited, you head back to your apartment and he holds your hand the whole way back. He blushed at you several times when he looked into your eyes. You both goof off and dance around, because in the window of someone’s apartment, they were playing your favorite song. As you were dancing around, you were having the time of your life. There was a middle aged couple sitting on their steps and the male grabbed your hand, “We need more young people like you, who are not afraid of judgement, and who allows themselves to do what they want.” The lady beside him chimed in, “By the way, you two make a beautiful couple.” You wanted to let them know that you were not in a relationship, but you couldn’t bring yourself to it. You walked two more minutes to get to your apartment and right before you walk in, Joel asked something, “(Y/N), why didn’t you say anything when the lady said that we were a beautiful couple?” You responded in a quiet tone, “I didn’t want to hurt their feelings by saying we were just friends.” You open the door and walk in. He follows and says, “Wow (Y/N), this is nice. Have you re-decorated? It looks good.”

You thank him and jet off to go pack your things up for Florida. Within an hour and a half, you were ready to go. Joel sat in the room with you and you asked him a couple of questions about the tour. He responded quickly, but he was watching you the whole time. You asked him basic questions: “Where did you get to travel?” “Did you liked where you traveled?” “What was the experience like out there?” (etc.) He watched every movement you made and he even helped you pick out some of your clothes. He played music that you loved, so you were dancing around, singing, and packing up at the same time. He handed you the clothes that he wanted you to wear out of the closet as well. It was all shorts and tank tops, minus one fancy dress that you had, but you never really wore. He asked you to try it on. It was a beautiful red lace dress and you had the red pumps to match it. You reluctantly agree to try it on. When you walk out of the bathroom, his jaw dropped. “I have never seen you wear a dress and you look absolutely stunning in it! You are taking this on the trip. No question.”

You go to change back into the regular clothes and you come back out. He was still amazed at you and he walked up to you, “I really like you in a dress. You look beautiful in it.” You thank him and went back to dancing. You were being a complete goofball around him. He was laughing and joined you. You were folding your shirts and pants as he was dancing around the room to Michael Jackson. You laugh at him because he was having a good time and so were you. A little while later, you were finally finished packing, so you gather everything up.

You walk out of the door and ask him if you were driving or if it was him. He replied and said he was driving. He pointed at his blue hippie van. You stop dead in your tracks, because you were scared to mess anything up; it was a classic. He reassured that you were okay and that you weren’t gonna mess it up. After you got everything in the car and started to drive down the road a little ways, you asked what songs were you gonna play. You also asked about the kind of car games were you gonna play. He smiled, “Remember I asked you five months ago what were your favorite songs? I made a playlist.” You smile as he grabs your hand and kisses it. You looked startled and he apologizes, “(Y/N), can we just forget that that happened?” You agree and start to sing your favorite songs with the windows rolled down. He had also mixed in a few other songs, but he mainly listened to what you liked. You felt like a free spirit with the wind blowing through your hair. It felt like it was caressing you with the most gentle touch.

When you put your head back in the car, he smiled, “This is why I love you, because you do what you want, when you want.” You shockingly look at him and asked, “What did you say? I want to make sure I heard you correctly.” He didn’t speak for a long time. He pulled over and turned to you, “I wanted to take you on this trip because I thought that this would be a great bonding experience. I feel like I want more than just a friendship from you… I hope that I’m not making a fool of myself.” You don’t say anything for a moment, trying to process what was just said to you by your crush. He reacts quickly by saying, “Sorry I made that mis-” You cut him off as you kiss him with passion in your heart and love on your lips. He was taken back for a moment, but fought for dominance and won. His lips were sending a gentle spark of love and electricity coursing through your body. It made you weak and you wanted more. You made him stop. There was a certain window of time you had to pick up the boys. They were all in Virginia.

You both sit in silence for about five minutes. Joel spoke first, “So, (Y/N), how long have you liked me?” Surprised at the question, you turn to him, but you tell him the truth. “About 5 years ago, when I started to see your true beautiful personality. Joelito, I truly do love you.” His smile was radiant and his shy look came out with his pearly white teeth when he smiled. “Mi amor, I love you too.” You both were talking for about 3 hours about every time that you hinted at him that you really did love him in every imaginable way. You are tired, but you are trying to talk to him. You feel yourself drift off to sleep. You try to fight it, but you realized that Joel pulled over to wrap you up so you could rest. You hear him whisper, “Goodnight, my love. I don’t know what I would do without you.” Just then, you feel him gently kiss your cheek and forehead with the lips of an angel.

You wake up later and see Joel is still driving. You tell him to pull over so he could get some rest because he’s tired. You can see it in his eyes. He pulls over and you see the state line say “Welcome to Virginia”. You wonder how long you had been asleep. You check your phone as you get out of the car and you realize that it had been about ten and a half hours. He took some shortcuts and went over the speed limit like he usually does. When you get fully get out of the car and walk to his side, he grabs you and kisses you with a gentle hug in-between. “Mi amor, I never want to leave your side. I will marry you one day.” You blush and tell him that you would accept his marriage proposal any day. You also tell him that you love him unconditionally. He lets you go so you can drive. Joel texted the boys that he was only a little while away from them. You talked to him and told him about how you liked New York, and that it was weird to experience something completely new in Florida. He responded, “You are going to love where I’m taking you. I’m going to be your personal tour guide, forget anyone else doing it.”

A couple of hours later, you arrive at the hotel that everyone else was at. Everyone put their things in the van. You take off and the first thing that happened was that little Aaliyah wanted to be in the front to talk to you. Every once in awhile, she managed to escape Richard’s grip when he drifted asleep. Erick managed to slide up to you and talk for awhile about how the tour went and that Joel actually liked you. You explain to Erick what happened between you and Joel. He smiled, “Good, now he can stop talking about you to us.” You ask him what he means he said that Joel would always say things like, “I can’t wait to see (Y/N). Her eyes touch my soul and it makes me feel happy inside.” “ I can’t wait to see (Y/N) because she is very nice to me and she is very beautiful. I want her in my life forever.” Erick said that they always teased him about marrying you one day, and that you two were meant to be together. Erick went to the other boys and told them. Christopher said, “Bro, those two are LOVE. BUGS.” You laugh at him and turned up your music, but not too loud. Zab smirked, “I knew they were in love.” You smile and turn towards Joel. You saw him asleep; he looked so peaceful.

Several hours later, you start to feel tired and realize that you had passed North Carolina and were now in Georgia. You didn’t realize because the boys were playing games and reading stories with Aaliyah, much of which you read as a child, so it soothed you in a way. Aaliyah loved you and would set up her toys near you in the front. You made sure that you were driving safe. She would get you to play with her, even just using your arm. After a while, she was tuckered out and went to lay in her dad’s arms. Joel woke up and asked how long had he been asleep. You told him almost the whole day. At this point, everyone else was asleep. Joel said that he wanted to talk to you while the others were asleep from the long trip. He wanted to talk about marriage and having kids. He was asking if you wanted kids or not and you smile, “Yes, I do want kids.” He smiles and agreed, “So do I ,(Y/N). I have always wanted kids, but I never knew who the perfect woman was until I found you. I always wanted to be with you, but I did not want to ruin our friendship. It was too precious to me.”

Then, he asks you about marriage plans and that is a whole two hour topic in itself. You described to him what you wanted and everything. Everyone had woken up by the time, so you both finish the conversation, and explaining what you wanted at the wedding. The time passed so fast, you didn’t realize that you were just passing the Florida welcome sign. Joel tells you to get out of the car and that he was driving around for the rest of the time. You agree because you were not sure as to what he wanted to do. “I am taking you somewhere special. I hope that you like it.” You say that you are sure that you will. You all sang and danced along with the songs that were on the playlist. In the back, everyone was playing games and watching movies. They were telling you what happened.

He tells you to put a blindfold on and you do. You don’t know what it’s for or why you’re wearing it. When you stop, you’re confused at the fact that there was a lot of noise. Joel guided your walking. You realize that you are at Disneyland because you hear a kid say, “Hey mom, let’s check out the Mickey hats!” You tell Joel that you know where you are as he guided you a little more. He tells you to take the blindfold off. You see that you are at your favorite Disney movie area and he smiled, “(Y/N), I hope you like it and you take a ride around every favorite movie you love.” About three hours later, you were done and he said, “I want to take you somewhere else, mi amor.” He tells the boys he would be back. He left for a while. You went around for a little while more while he disappeared. He came back and apologized, “You’re coming with me. I’m sorry I left you for such a long time.” You went back to the van and he drove off, telling you to put your blindfold on again. You stop and he guides you to the luggage, where he takes your blindfold off. He ask you to look in your suitcase and get the red dress. You grab it and he puts your blindfold back on. Immediately, he guides you up some steps. You smell some amazing food as he opens up a door. He walks you to the bathroom and takes off the blindfold. You know you are in a restaurant, so you change into the outfit quickly.

When you come out, you see he has rented the whole building out, just so you two could have a date. It was an Italian restaurant, so you got the spaghetti and meatballs. You both shared a plate. You sit right beside each other, and just like in Lady and The Tramp, there was one long noodle and it caused you two to kiss. He kept kissing you; it seemed as if he never wanted to stop. You found it super cute because of this grand gesture. There was even music playing in the back and the owner, when he had come out with the food, left a note. You were anxious to read it. It said, “From: Joel” You looked at him while he ate the spaghetti. He was making goofy faces, so you laughed and opened it up. Inside was a handwritten letter saying, “Since the first day that I met you, I knew that you were a special part of my life. As I have gotten older, I realized just how special you were to me. I have always wanted to do this, but I could never find the right time. Today is the day.” You turn to Joel with tears in your eyes. You wipe them away and see him on one knee. He asked the question you waited your entire life for. “(Y/N), will you marry me?” You smiled, “Yes!” He puts the ring on your finger. It was beautiful and 14 karats. He kissed you and said, “I wanted this for a long time. I just never knew how to ask for it. Thank you mi amor, for always being there and caring for me. You have seen the good in me, even when I couldn’t see it in myself. I want to always be with you, and nothing will ever change that.” You agree with him and kiss him again. You finish your meal and walk out. The boys texted him congrats and you had driven back to Disneyland to pick them up. They all get in the van and congratulate you both. They were picking on you, making kissy sounds and stuff. You didn’t care. You knew exactly where you wanted to be and it was with Joel.

#cnco imagine #cnco #cncowners #joel pimentel #fluff

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seouledbysisi · 5 years

Text

New World

Chapter 1

Gianna & Mia

Mia ran into Gianna's room jumping up and down on the bed! “Girl you'll never believe what I just read online!” She yelled into Gianna's ear.

Gianna's eyes widened as she covered her ears. “Calm down! Have you been eating candy?”

Mia rolled her eyes. “No, I'm just super excited!” She squealed.

“Obviously! What is it?” Gianna was a bit annoyed. Not because of Mia but more so because of her boss.

Mia could sense that Gianna's attitude was off. She plopped down on the bed. “What's wrong GiGi?”

“My stupid boss is what's wrong.” She whined. “I'll be so glad when I finally graduate and can get away from that hell hole.”

Mia raised a eyebrow. “What happened?”

“I've closed every night since I started working there. I work my ass off pulling double shifts and everything. I ask for one night off so I can study for my finals and he said I have to find someone to cover my shift or else I have to work.” Gianna had been so stressed out lately. It was her last semester in school and it seemed like graduation couldn't get there fast enough.

A light bulb went off in Mia's head. “I have an idea!”

Gianna looked up at her with confused eyes.

“What's Adam's number?” She asked.

Gianna shook her head. “He won't cover for me. He barely likes working his own shifts.” She sighed.

Mia rolled her eyes and snatched Gianna's phone out of her hand. She dialed his number and waited for an answer.

“Hello?” He answered.

Mia exhaled deeply. “Hey this is Mia . I need a huge favor from you.”

He chuckled a bit. “What is it?”

“My best friend has a huge exam next week and if she doesn't pass she won't graduate so I need you to cover her shift tomorrow night if you don't mind.”

He held the phone for a second before answering. “What's in it for me?”

Mia rolled her eyes. “You get recognized as a good person?”

“I'm going to need something more than that!”

“Well what do you want?” She asked. She was becoming annoyed.

He began to laugh a little. “A date. . .with you!”

“Umm no! Something else.”

“Well I guess your friend might not be graduating as soon as she thought. Goodnight!”

Mia sighed loudly. “Wait!” She groaned. “I'll do it.”

“I figured you'd change your mind, pick you up Saturday night around 7.” he said quickly and hung up.

Mia almost threw up listening to his last words. He wasn't ugly but he was annoying and didn't show much respect for women. “You owe me big time!”

“He agreed?” Gianna's eyes widened.

“Only because I have to go on a date with him.” Mia had tears in her eyes.

Gianna hugged her tightly. “What would I ever do without you?”

“Nothing!” Mia smiled.

“I guess we'll both be graduating!” Gianna smiled big.

Mia nodded. She had almost forgot about the news she had to tell Gianna about. “So about what I read!”

”Oh yeah, share the excitement!”

“So, you know how NCT 127 are coming to the States?” Mia started.

Gianna nodded. “Yeah don't remind me. I can't believe the tickets got sold out THAT fast!”

“But that's just it, Gianna! We have another chance to maybe go.”

Gianna cocked her head to the right. “What are you talking about?”

“They're having a contest. It's a writing contest where you have to tell about why NCT is inspiring to you and what they mean to you. They're picking one winner from each state that they're having a concert in.” Mia exclaimed.

Gianna groaned. “So you're going to be that fan girl?”

Mia shrugged. “If it gets me a chance to see Johnny and all of the others then hell yes!”

Gianna giggled. “Well you go girl!” She began to walk away to the kitchen. Mia followed.

“You're the best writer I know, Gianna. I need your skills.”

“So you want me to write this essay for you? No way, you know I'm not into doing all that crazy fan girl stuff. Plus there's no way we'd win.”

Mia poked her bottom lip out. “Pretty please?” She said in a cute voice.

“That cute baby voice is not working on me this time.” Gianna shrugged and sat on the couch.

Mia rolled her eyes. “You have to do this for me! I'm going on a date with Adam for you. You realize how atrocious he is, right?”

“Yeah he is pretty horrible and I do appreciate you but I can't do it. I don't have time.” Gianna sighed.

Mia crossed her arms and pouted. “Did I forget to mention that if we win we get to spend a few hours with them before the concert?”

Gianna turned towards her quickly. “It's not working, Alonna.”

“Okay, I guess you don't wanna spend a once in a life time day with THE Lee Taeyong.” Mia hummed and walked towards her bedroom slowly.

Gianna was being pulled into two directions. She loved Taeyong with a passion, she was probably secretly his biggest fan but school was super important and with her hectic schedule there was no way she'd be able to write something up to par. She didn't want to be the reason that her best friend missed this once in a lifetime chance.

“. . .Ice across my wrist now I can barely see the time. I just made a million and I'm still not satisfied.” Mia walked back out of her room singing.

Gianna squeezed her eyes shut. She groaned. “Cause I need the bag on the regular, I spend the bag on the regular.” She finished singing the line for Mia and did the “regular, huh” dance.

“Don't you wanna hear them sing that live?” Mia asked as she grabbed Gianna's hands.

“When does it have to be submitted?” She asked.

Mia stretched her lips a bit. “Tomorrow by noon but I'll help you study!”

Gianna shook her head. “Oh no!”

“Lee Taeyong! Nakamoto Yuta! Johnny? Doyoung? Please!” Mia was giving her best at persuasion.

Gianna exhaled loudly. “C'mon girl! You better be glad that I'm in love with Taeyong otherwise I wouldn't do this. Plus, hearing Taeil hit his high notes is going to be life-saving.”

Mia grabbed her laptop and they began writing.

“Wait! So how many winners can their be?” Gianna asked quickly.

“So whoever wins will get two up front tickets.” Mia explained.

“But does that mean we both spend the day with them or just one of us?” Gianna wanted to be sure she was going to meet Mr. Lee too.

Mia giggled. “Yes, GiGi! You will meet Lee Taeyong in the flesh.”

Gianna's grin got bigger. “This better be the best essay I've ever written then. So when you think of NCT what's the first word that comes into your mind?”

Mia thought for a moment. “Edge! They have so much flare, they're so different from other groups. Not just K-pop though, just music groups in general. They're not afraid to be different and weird. They have their own style but it works in all the right ways. What about you?”

“Innovation. They incorporate all of these new styles and old styles and make it work. They don't stick to mainstream types of music, they give music life and a new meaning. It's creative to be honest. Kind of like a breath of fresh air.”

Mia smiled big as she was in awe. “The best air!” Mia blushed. “Write all of that. You have a way with words. You're going to be the best journalist ever when we graduate.”

“And you're going to be the best fashionista/stylist ever!” Gianna smiled as she continued to write. “How does their music make you feel?”

“Invincible! Like I could do anything in the world that I set my mind to.” Mia explained and she wasn't lying. NCT's lyrics were deep and they touched her.

Gianna smiled. She put the finishing touches to the essay which ended up being a lot longer than she anticipated but it was definitely a work of art. “You know even if we don't win these tickets, at least they will have some type of confirmation of how great they truly are.”

Mia read over the essay. “If we don't win, something's totally wrong with them.” She giggled and submitted the essay.

“When do they announce the winner?” Gianna asked.

Mia read over the rules and information for the contest. “Saturday. It'll be night here when they announce it but I guess day for them.”

“The concert is in what, 3 weeks?” Gianna asked as she thought of outfit choices. She wanted to scream and jump but that just wasn't in her nature.She was getting a little ahead of herself. They hadn’t even won yet but she liked to be prepared.

“Yeah, and to our luck it's on the weekend.” Mia was so ecstatic.

Gianna sighed. “You might have to go on another date with Adam so he can cover another shift for me.” She laughed.

Mia acted as if she was going to throw up. “This is a one time thing. You're just gonna have to quit your job, ma'am if they won't let you off.”

“I can't afford to quit my job!” Gianna giggled.

Mia raised an eyebrow. “You really don't have to stay at that crappy restaurant. Your mom pays all the bills for this condo. She's willing to give you money, Gi.”

“I don't want her to have to give me money too. She already does enough!” Gianna sighed. She was so grateful for her mom but she didn't want her mom to do any more than she had to.

“The coffee shop is hiring on campus. We don't make as much as you but at least you'd get treated better. Our manager is really nice. Plus we close at 7 so you'd be out of there by 8. I could put in a good word for you.”

Gianna squinted a bit as she looked out at the balcony. “I thought y'all weren't hiring?”

Mia looked confused. “Oh you're talking about when I told Aaliyah that we weren't accepting applications?”

Gianna nodded.

Mia looked away. “I may have lied.”

Gianna slapped her arm. “Why would you do that?”

“Because she's hella annoying! I deal with her enough in our classes, I wasn't about to torture myself anymore.”

Gianna laughed. “Well put me in a good word cause I'm sick of Javier!”

“I can call Marty right now if you want. We need the help because two people are leaving soon.” Mia grabbed her phone and dialed him.

The phone rang and rang. Mia was starting to think he wasn't going to answer. “Talk to me!” he picked up cooly.

“Hey Marty are you busy?” She could hear a lot of rattling in his background.

“Uh no. What's up?”

“So I know we will be having two positions opening, right?”

“Yeah, why?”

“Have you already filled them?”

“I have a guy lined up. I need someone else too though. You know anyone?”

“My best friend needs another job like asap!” Mia explained.

Gianna simply sat there listening to their conversation.

“You recommend her? Is he a good worker?”

“The best! She's very reliable.”

He became silent for a moment. “She wouldn't be able to start until the week after next week. Is that okay?”

Mia looked at Gianna for confirmation. Gianna nodded eagerly. “That's great! Yes. She can do that.”

“Okay well she can have the job, just bring her to the shop tomorrow so she can fill out some papers. Goodnight, Mia.” He said and hung up.

Gianna pulled Mia into a hug quickly. “Thank you so much for doing that. You're the best for real.”

“It's no more than you'd do for me. You let me live here rent free, I got your back no matter what!” Mia told her.

NCT 127

They were all sitting around the living room in their dorm. “So we all have to decide on the winning essays, right?” Johnny asked.

“Yeah. The managers are giving us free reign with this since it was our idea. We have to pick the best of the best; the essays that speak to our souls the most.” Taeyong explained.

Mark's eyes widened. “Well that got deep way too fast.” He laughed.

Taeyong's eyes snapped to him. “It's supposed to be deep. We have so many fans who didn't get a chance to get tickets for whatever reason, so we need to choose NCTzens who deserve it the most.”

Mark cut his laughter off quickly and nodded.

“We have to choose Vegas' and LA winners first since those are our first stops.” Johnny added.

Doyoung nodded. “We have to make a decision by Saturday. Have any been submitted yet?”

Taeyong looked up the submissions and seen so many. There were a few whose titles stood out to him. He kept scrolling until he came across one of the newest submissions. “A New World.” Taeyong said out loud.

All the guys looked confused. “What you got on your mind,boss?” Haechan asked.

The guys gathered around the computer to see what had Taeyong looking strange. “NCT as a whole brings new concept to music and gives fans, all around the world, the courage to believe in a better and new world that we can all strive in.” Johnny read aloud.

All of the guys faces were shocked in astonishment. “Woah!” They all said collectively as they read the remainder of the essay.

Jaehyun smiled. “I like that! I don't even need to hear anything else.”

Taeyong chuckled. “Let's not get too ahead of ourselves. We have two more days to receive essays, then and ONLY then will we make a decision.”

“You gotta admit that it will be hard to top that. It gave me chills knowing that someone believes in our mission that much.” Johnny stated.

“Yeah it was great and all but everyone deserves a chance. See y'all in the morning.” Taeyong answered and walked to his, Johnny and Jaehyun's room.

Jungwoo gave Johnny a small smile and rubbed his shoulder. “I know everyone felt what you felt but you know leader-nim is going to do what's best. You never know, something better may come along and maybe not. If that essay is meant to win, it will.”

Johnny shrugged. “I'm not stressing over it, I just think whoever wrote that has a really good heart and a nice set of writing skills.” He said with laughter.

#nct 127 #nct #nct u #nct dream #taeyong #lee taeyong #nakamoto yuta #jung jaehyun #seo johnny #haechan #jungwoo #doyoung #win win #mark lee #nctzen #fanfic #kpop #kpop idols

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ayacxo · 6 years

Text

The 2018 Relationship Age,Instagram,and more.

Firstly, thank you so much for reading this. I am used to journaling and this is my first time writing for public eyes, so enjoy!

Now to lets get straight to the point; the modern 2018 relationship. Do we believe its harder now than it was in the 1920's? Oh absolutely! I mean as a woman we’ve been exposed to propaganda our whole lives on the fairy tale where your fairy godmother blesses you with perfectly fitting, comfortable glass slippers(we all secretly prayed they would be the louboutins we all still dream about to this day) and we'd ride off into the sunset with prince charming and the end. Sorry ladies, never gonna happen! Why would we want it to be that way? We are the bad ass take no sh*t millennial's who swipe left if we think based on someones picture and 2 sentence bio we have a "connection". Sorry my tinder/grinder users, as basic as I just made it sound is truly how basic it is but this is a judgement free zone! But lets go down the list of the modern relationship of 2018.

YAS! Thank you fairy godmother!

Age

As Aaliyah said, "Age ain't nothing but a number!" If you're 23 like me that song has been in your life as long as you can remember(if you haven't heard it pause your reading and play it now). So maybe that was drilled into our minds through sultry R&B or its just simply the truth. I'm leaning more towards the simple truth. In my personal relationship my boyfriend and I are 7 years apart. As time has gone on, I have realized that everyone around me is dating with a 7-10+ year gap between them and no one's complaint is ever "He's just too old." I will say though there is always an occasion when I'm calling or getting a call that says, "...like he's my dad or something!" I always question this part of things like is this just how men try and show they wear the pants, or do these men just want us to not repeat their previous mistakes because they are older than us? I think its a sprinkle of both, and for us modern day relationship doers, my best advice on age gaps is 1.) trust your partners knowledge 2.) trust your life experiences as well to asses situations for yourself 3.) always stress the necessity for reciprocity in decision making, that way you both wear the pants. To conclude this I think that in 2018 it's better to date for what YOU like and want, rather than feel like because your close in age it won't be as successful or because there is an age gap he has all the answers. Don't be afraid to take charge trust me, you don't want to go to sleep dreaming of your man struggling to get into a pair of skinny jeans(no? just me? okay.) because your subconscious is telling you to make that decision.

Again, listen to the song if you haven't already!

Instagram

I planned to write this part last because it probably should be its own post, but I believe I can word it perfectly without over doing it so lets get into it people! Instagram is probably the most consistent social media platform I use currently, it has everything all on one app and I ask for nothing more. But I can admit it's created small issues in my relationship (truly small guys) and I mostly was the one with the issue. I grew up where dating meant you the put your anniversary date in your bio, posted every single picture you could with the sweetest caption from your favorite Drake song and you waited for all of your 900 followers to like it to show the world, you are in a relationship and a happy one. And then you date someone older than you and you realize, they don't give a f*ck about posting you let alone themselves on instagram.

"wait so you're saying you don't have instagram?"

And then we all are Jaden Smith, thoroughly confused as to how another human can exist with this mindset. And now this guy is your boyfriend and your 4 months in passing all the holidays without getting posted and you're like whatever its just Instagram I am a mature young woman, I am confident in myself. But as I recently discussed with one of my best friends is that what we really need to be saying to ourselves? Deep down everyone wants validation which is why Instagram is so important, just 10 likes and you know you're on to something, but what does it mean in the modern 2018 relationship, when you're not getting your recognition? Well here's how I can answer that by telling you my word for word head on experience:

Me: So why don't you post me on your Instagram? Are you just not that guy, or is it because we are still new?

Him: No, 1.) its MY Instagram so I post whatever moves me and 2.) I don't want to post you because it's no ones business

Me: Oh okay.

Me in my head: SO YOU'RE TELLING ME THAT I AM A SECRET?! IS IT BECAUSE ALL THE GIRLS IN YOUR DMS WILL THEN STOP SENDING DMS? AM I UGL...Wait no, that's never the case. *continues to rant*

So as you could imagine it took me about 3 days to wrap my millennial mind around this concept, and I came to the conclusion of "What more can I really ask for?" I am with him almost everyday, we talk all day, and when we don't we usually know each others plan for the day. Did Instagram really have to define what we're doing? No. And so ladies and gentleman (because don't get it twisted ladies men are usually way more offended you aren't showing them off than you'd think) here's my advice for this part of the modern 2018 relationship 1.) Post whatever the f*ck you want, whenever you want but don't do it for validation Instagram was meant to entertain the user 2.)Older men may or may not like to post you but if their friends and family know who you are then no Instagram post can give you anymore validation than that. 3.)Don't sit on your words,if something makes you uncomfortable say something because 9 times out of 10 what we think isn't what it is. All in all we young millennial gals take way better photos anyway, so its probably best we do the posting.

And finally the more..

So guys we are nearing the end of this post, and again thank you SOOOOOOO much for reading this far. But lets finish this strong; 2018. The year where you can barely tell pop culture and political news apart, is also the year of so much LOVE. And sometimes it's going to be love our parents can't understand, and that doesn't mean their advice isn't valid or your friends advice isn't valid. I just believe this is also a time to figure love out for ourselves. Figure out what we really do and don't like, who we do and don't like. What are the things that motivate us individually to want to spend time with someone? These are things that take time and self care to learn but it also takes WORK. Yes, relationships are work and not always the fairy tales we think they should be and that is okay. To conclude this I will give you my most modern 2018 fairy tale moment in my own relationship.

We actually laugh in bed like this over stand up jokes we try on one another before bed.

So if you know me you know Beyonce' is EVERYTHING I proudly stan for her and she put on the most epic amazing performance at Coachella this you (curse you but also bless you if you saw it live) and I was super bummed because I was working the day it was streaming completely missed the whole thing, so the next day I am sulking around watching everyone fan girl out and watching sad Instagram videos of the bits and pieces of this epic performance, my boyfriend who knows everything about anything on the internet is like, "Why are you watching it on Instagram I can just download it for you" I am still not trusting his computer smarts, "Like HD version not like someones phone like actual video?!" he's like, "Yeah." a few click clack patty whacks later he's like, " Here's the file when it's done it'll ding but if you want I am going to the roof when I come back I'll watch it with you." Now ladies this isn't the best story but understand not only did he get me Beyonce' but he wanted to watch it with me so now I am just reeling! Long story short, we watched Beyonce' cuddled up and thoroughly enjoyed it and that was my fairy tale. I want all of you reading this, skimming it, pretending to read to walk away with just this one thing; in 2018 no one but YOU can define what your relationship is and that is okay as long as it speaks to your character and serves YOU equally in happiness, and joy then do it, talk about what you do and don't like and remember that every fairy tale ends differently, and no fairy tale is the same.

Or maybe we do get to ride away into the sunset.

My Boyfriend pretended to hate this picture up until he saw my photog skills and proceeded to pose until we came out with this

#love #humans #people #life #millennials #relatable #relax #read #long reads #brooklyn #new york #instagram #blogger #blog #ask me anything #ask blog #tagged #beyonce #fairy tales #fairy

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shawnsassymendes · 7 years

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Potential Tattoos {Tattoos iii}

Warnings: pregnancy and miscarriages talk (duh), fainting, and my first attempt at flangst???

Summary: You and Shawn are breaking, but not in each other’s arms. Until you are. (i suck at these i’m sorryyyyy)

Word count: 2.4k

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5

Masterlist

____________________

You woke up to the feeling of someone wrapping their arms around you.

“Shawn?” You groaned, turning to see him.

“Hey, babe.” He smiled at you.

“I thought-I thought you left.” You put your hand on his cheek and looked up at him in confusion.

“I-I did. I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have exploded like that. That was wrong. I don’t even know what hit me. Please forgive me?” He looked at you through his lashes.

“How can I refuse such a handsome face?” You whispered after a moment of looking at him, causing him to laugh bashfully. Golden eyes glittering in the sunlight streaming through the curtains. You hoped your baby would have his eyes.

“What?” Shawn furrowed his brows at you.

“What? Did I say something?” You didn’t say that out loud, did you?

“You said-you said you wanted our baby to have my eyes? What-What are you saying, y/n?” He was sitting up now, confusion lacing his features. Not only that, but what seemed to be...anger too.

“I did-I didn’t say that, I-” You stuttered before he cut you off.

“There you go again with the lying. What is wrong with you, y/n?! This,” He motioned to you as he was getting up from the bed, “this isn’t the person I fell in love with.”

“What are y-you saying?” You whispered through the tears that were streaming down your face at this point without you even realizing it. He didn’t mean it. He didn’t mean it. He didn’t mean it.

“You know exactly what I’m saying.” He glared at you.

“Are you saying that you don’t l-love me anymore?”

“Are you sure I’m the one who started losing the love we had?”

“I never stopped loving you! Don’t throw this on me! I love you! I still love you! And what sucks is that I don’t think I’m ever gonna stop loving you!”

“See, I don’t think you do. People who love each other don’t lie to each other.” He seethed at you before storming out of his room, slamming the door behind him. Leaving you a mess on the bed.

____________________

“y/n! y/n wake up!” You felt someone shake you awake.

“What? What happened? Where’s- Where’s Shawn?” You shot up out of bed, rubbing your eyes. You looked to your side to see Karen sitting next to you.

“He hasn’t come back. Since last night. Darling, you were screaming.” Karen said, looking at you with sympathy.

“I was?”

“Yes, in your sleep. Are you alright?”

“I’m-I’m fine. What do you mean he hasn’t come back since last night?”

“I mean he hasn’t come back. He went for a walk after-after what happened. But when I woke up this morning, his car wasn’t here. I think he’s gone to the condo, dear.”

“Oh? I thought-I thought-Never mind. I’m gonna go...I’m gonna go freshen up, I guess.” You said, no emotion evident in your voice.

____________________

Everyone had told you guys that a marriage this young wasn’t going to end well. Everyone said that you would have an early, messy divorce. One of his aunts even told you not to have kids, so they wouldn’t be involved in it.

Obviously, you and Shawn ignored everyone. You were too helplessly in love with each other to take any of their concerns into consideration.

Maybe, just maybe, they were right all along. Would Shawn be calling himself a divorced man at such a young age?

His phone ringing cut his trail of thought.

“Mom?” Shawn asked into the phone, curious as to why his mother was calling him at 5:30 in the morning.

“I am so disappointed in you! How could you do this to your wife? Your wife, Shawn!”

“Mom, it’s the crack of dawn. Why are you calling about this now?” He huffed, already done with thinking about this.

“Because y/n’s screams woke me up. You know what she was screaming about, Shawn? No, you don’t. Because you left. She was screaming that she still loves you. She thinks that you don’t love her anymore. And honestly, I don’t blame her.”

Karen hung up at that. Leaving Shawn stunned, staring at his phone.

Why would you think that Shawn didn’t love you anymore? Of course he loves you. He would never stop loving you. He was just...confused. Why would you keep something from him? You never kept anything from each other.

He knew that you had separate lives. But you never kept something that seemed this big from each other. If his entire family knew, then it had to mean something. Right?

Then it hit him.

You thought he didn’t love you anymore.

He scrambled off the rug in his living room to the door, grabbing a hoodie and his keys on the way out. He couldn’t stop telling himself how stupid he was as he was driving to his parent’s house.

____________________

You sat down in shower, letting the water wash over your face. You weren’t thinking about anything in particular. Just taking in the peace and quiet in the bathroom. You were done with your shower, but you didn’t want to leave. It was far more peaceful than what was waiting for you in the ‘real world’.

You opened your eyes and looked over the bathroom tiles, noticing the occasional chip. You eyes trailed over the tub. Taking in the slight purple pigment that you and Shawn stained the tub when trying to prank Aaliyah. Needless to say, you were walking around with purple blotchy skin for a week after that. Aaliyah was too smart for you guys.

You chuckled, but you stopped when your ankle caught your eye. More specifically, the tattoo on your ankle. The one that both you and Shawn had. The one you and Shawn shared. The tattoo that expressed your love for each other.

Your fingers traced the delicate lines of the intertwined hands. Your eyes slowly went up to your stomach. Or what was in there. It was a product of you love, no wonder your mind lead your eyes there.

You had a little baby in there. True, they were still incredibly tiny. But there was a baby there nonetheless.

A little bit of you and a little bit of Shawn.

“Hey there.” You whispered, eyes tearing up. “I’m sorry I haven’t talked to you. It’s been a busy few weeks. I just wanted-no needed, I needed to tell you that I love you. So much. And so does your dad, he just doesn’t know it yet. But he’s gonna love you more than life itself. I can’t wait to tell him. He’s a little mad at me, but we’re gonna get over that. I promise. For you. For us. For our little family. I-”

“y/n? You still in there?” You heard Manny yell through the door, stopping the conversation you were having with your unborn child.

“Y-Yeah! I’m in here.”

“Honey, it’s been three hours. I think you should come out now.” He said loud enough for you to hear.

“Gimme a minute.”

You shut off the water and dragged yourself out of the tub. You wrapped the towel you had prepared around your body. When you opened the door and the gust of cold wind hit you, your vision started to go blurry.

“Dad? I don’t-I don’t feel so good. I’m-I’m dizzy.” You whispered, out of breath, before dropping to the ground.

____________________

Shawn unlocked the door to his parents’ house, only to be welcomed by his dad screaming your name.

“Dad?! What’s going?!” He bounded up the stairs. When he reached the landing, he saw you clad in a towel, limp as a paper doll, in his dad’s arms. “What happened?”

Shawn came to his knees in front of you and his dad. He cradled your head in his lap gingerly. “Did she have anything to eat?” His heart started beating rapidly when he saw your pale face.

“I don’t know. Karen?!” Manny yelled just as Karen and Aaliyah ran up the stairs.

“What happened?” Karen yelled, eyes wide as she took in the situation.

“Did y/n have any food before she took a shower?” Shawn cut in.

“No, I don’t think so.” Karen stuttered.

“Liyah, get me some-some sugar! Yes, get sugar!” Aaliyah bolted down the stairs and to the kitchen.

“This happened before?”

“Yeah, a couple times. She worries about me and forgets herself.” Shawn muttered to his dad just as your eyes suddenly fluttered open. You immediately started hyperventilating.

“Wha-What happened? What’s going on? Shawn? What?-”

“Hey baby, calm down. It’s ok. You’re ok. Everything’s alright. What did I tell you about eating before taking a shower, huh? You gotta take care of yourself, what if I didn’t come in when I did? You freaked mom and dad out.” Shawn said calmly, knowing that if he freaked out, you would too.

“I got the sugar!” Aaliyah toppled up the stairs and landed on her knees.

“Thanks.” Shawn muttered, helping you sit up. He took a pinch of sugar and sprinkled it in your mouth.

You let out a sigh of relief as the hollow feeling left your chest and you felt human again.

“What the hell just happened?! I thought you died!” Aaliyah yelled at you, but pulling you into a hug at the same time.

“I-I’m sorry. That hasn’t happened in a while. I forgot. I promise I won’t forget again.” You whispered into her shoulder.

“As long as you’re ok now, darling. You just had us worried.” Karen held herself back. She was going to say ‘well who wouldn’t be when a pregnant woman drops to the floor’. She needed to be more careful.

“Honey, you should go get dressed now. When you’re done, come downstairs and have some food.” Manny said, helping you up. You took a glance at Shawn to see that he was already looking at you.

That hurt puppy look on his face didn’t really help the fact that you decided to stick to the plan and not tell him yet. Even though you really, truly, desperately wanted to tell him, you knew that you shouldn’t.

It was for the best.

At least that’s how you’ve been trying to justify it to yourself.

____________________

“What do you think you are doing, young man?!” Manny scolded his son. He made sure to keep his voice low so you wouldn’t hear them, but the fire in his eyes was enough to show how angry he was.

Shawn knew it was best not to respond, so he looked down at his hands nervously playing with the hem of his shirt.

“I thought you were more mature than this, Shawn. No, I know you are more mature than this. What’s going on? This has never happened before. What’s different now, huh? Why so angry at each other all of a sudden? Just because you’re married now doesn’t mean you have to fight, you know that right?!”

“No, I know that! It’s just that-I’ve never felt like this before. I don’t know, I feel more protective of her now that she’s my wife. I don’t like that she’s keeping secrets from me. I didn’t care that much before, but her secrets have never been this big. At least I think this one’s big, I mean you, mom, and Aaliyah know. And I’m her husband, Shouldn’t I be the first to know?”

“Shawn-” His mom sighed, but you walking down the stairs brought silence onto their conversation.

“Feeling better?” Aaliyah asked.

“Yeah, much. Just starving.” You chuckled, tucking a strand of damp hair behind your ear.

You went to the fridge and pulled out the leftover pancakes from breakfast.

“So, what are we talking about?” You asked, still preparing a plate for yourself.

“You.” Aaliyah said bluntly.

“Aaliyah!” Karen said sternly.

“What? It’s true! Why would she just faint? It’s never happened before. Have you gone to a doctor about this, y/n?” Your sister-in-law asked, crossing her arms.

“Yes, I have. With Shawn. Last year. Said I might be slightly anaemic. It’s seriously no big deal. I just forgot to eat before taking a shower. I’m fine.”

“If you say so. But don’t blame me if I get a little over protective, cause I’m telling you right now that I will.” Manny said, eyebrows raised in disbelief.

“Dad, you’ve always been over protective.” You chuckled.

“True.” He muttered, a small smile making it’s way on his face. Everyone chuckled in agreement.

A comfortable silence fell upon you, that is until it wasn’t comfortable anymore.

Aaliyah left the kitchen to ‘do some homework’, which you knew she didn’t have. Karen and Manny left to ‘get some things done in the garage’.

“So, I guess we gotta talk now, huh?” You asked, sitting in front of Shawn with your cup of decaf coffee in your hands. You knew coffee didn’t affect pregnancies that much, but you weren’t taking any risks.

“Yeah, we do. Let me start. I’m sorry I flipped out like that. It was not okay. I know that we are our own separate people, but forgive me if I forget that sometimes. I don’t want you to tell me what you’re hiding until you’re ready, ok? I respect you and what you decide to keep to yourself.” Shawn let out a breath after what seemed to be a scripted and frequently rehearsed speech.

“I’m sorry I got you so scared. I didn’t mean to. I will tell you what’s going on, sooner than you think. But I can’t do it right now. You just have to be patient with me. I know it’s gonna be hard, for you and me both, but we have to be strong. And I’m not strong unless I’m with you, so please don’t ever do that again.” You huffed, jumping out of your seat and into Shawn’s lap.

His arms immediately engulfed your frame. He took in a lung-full of your familiar scent and his heart seemed to finally relax after a full day without you.

“You’re an asshole, you know that?” You murmured into his neck. You felt his laugh coming from his chest before you heard it.

“Yeah, I know.” He whispered.

____________________

Part 4 Part 5

Tag list: @handwrittenmendess @dreamingwithmendes @negative-love

#Shawn Mendes #shawn mendes x reader #shawn peter raul mendes #Shawn Mendes fluff #shawn mendes imagine #shawn mendes smut #aaliyah mendes #why is aaliyah so pretty #OK I might love aaliyah more than Shawn #aaliyah is the better Mendes #karen Mendes #manny mendes #thank you karen and manny #the fainting thing has happened to me a couple times

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breanne-says-boo · 7 years

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The Vampire Chronicles Facebook Interview **Recap**(5/4/17)

The Television Show

Production

As many know now, they will be working with Paramount Television and Anonymous Content

They want to stay fully engaged with fans in the production process

No set broadcaster, all options open (Netflix, Hulu, etc.) (Chris joked about it being on Facebook)

Next announcement will be when that network is decided

No timeline for production. They have no idea how long it will take. Script-writing is next. Chris is the one who will be script-writing, Anne will review

Chris: “She finished writing season 1 when she wrote the books!”

Pilot is done. Next are more episodes. They are starting the process and having several meetings with Paramount and Anonymous Content

Anne SWEARS the series will be 100% loyal to the books. (They named GoT as an example of doing this though soooooo)

Anne said compromises are inevitable but artistic control comes from good will and respect; you make it work by picking people you admire and trust. They worked with Paramount and Anonymous Content since they all agreed on a common vision and the end result of the series

No idea about locations of sets and whatnot

Don’t know if they will keep with the 80’s period of the books, however Anne wants to do Lestat’s pre-vampire period period-accurate

Neil Jordan may end up helping out on the project

Casting

Still taking suggestions from fans and looking fancasts up on imdb

Anne: “Lestat is always shaking his fists to those who would break him down…Scrappish impish…lovable hero” Chris: “--and he’s hot!! :D He’s gonna be hot. #LestatIsHot”

Chris and Anne might want to cameo in the series (joked about making a game out of it)

Some characters may change where “ethnicity is flexible”

Anne and Chris agree that POC being casted are important and will be considered in casting. The Millennial vamps (older gang) will most likely be largely POC.

Anne says she has taken notice of black fans showing their admiration of Aaliyah playing Akasha.

Anne gave a story about meeting an Akasha cosplayer who mentioned that she and her friends feel left out of high fantasy for being black and how Anne was moved by this.

Anne: “Akasha isn’t written as black or a person of color…she’s middle eastern” Me: ??? (Those aren’t...mutually exclusive???) Anne: “--but she could be a person of color.”

Marius was played by a black man in the musical and Anne thought he did a great job. Marius can be any ethnicity so long as he’s half Roman. She’d prefer to have Marius as blue eyes and blonde haired like Lestat but it’s “not imperative for him”.

Anne: “Louis at least has to be beautiful”

Armand has to look as described as well.

Anne wanted Cher to play Gabrielle.

Anne and Chris to be inclusive, but will always focus more on how fine the actor is. Talent is needed to get the role, not just looks.

Armand will be casted as someone who looks 17, but will be technically older. Not sure about age for Lestat and Louis (Anne is thinking early 30s)

Physical and emotional aging will be put into consideration (she gave Marius as an example as him looking like he’s in his 40s but being mentally older)

Plot and Episodes

They will tell the story chronologically in Lestat’s eyes so wolves-paris-so on. Basically, how knowledge unfolds for Lestat is how it will unfold for audience THIS MAY CHANGE depending on when they talk to producers, however this is not what they want in terms of how the events should happen.

Don’t want to cheat on Lestat’s life and skip out any details of it (go figure)

Stay faithful to the books and to Lestat’s story

Chris warns for us to be mindful of news that doesn’t come from official page

Lestat and Gabbi’s journey to be expanded

Origin stories of Marius and other older vampires will be shown and expanded on (done through the flashback stories Marius gives)

Blood and Gold will be involved but they won’t DO the story (so using that material for possible spin offs)

A lot about the Talamasca and especially David. Jesse too, but mostly David

(Anne: He’s close friends with Lestat in TOTBT Me: Is that what you call it? lmao)

TVL could be 2-3 seasons. IWTV may be one. Depends

Anne and Chris want to know what goes wrong in the translation from book to media in other series so they can avoid it

They’re keeping eroticism the same as in the books.

Lestat turning Gabrielle will be a big scene, as they feel this is when the series starts to truly bring the vampire world into view and Lestat really starts becoming a vampire. This scene is significant in asking the audience what they would do in that instance. Lestat turning will also be significant.

Characters and Character Relations

SOMEONE FUCKING MENTIONED LOUSTAT AS THE LOUIS / LESTAT SHIP NAME AND THEY BOTH LOST IT (which one of you was it? Hm?)

There will be a lot about Louis and Lestat’s relationship in the series (and Lestat and Nicki)

Anne says she understands how important queer relationships are and how they have driven the series

*On expanding on other characters* Chris: ...human characters like Jesse or Daniel Mollo- Anne: OR LESTAT WHEN HE’S HUMAN Me: :/

Anne doesn’t feel a need to make new characters.

More info on Théâtre des Vampires and the characters in that part will expanded as well

Chris and Anne openly acknowledge Lestat as bisexual and this will be depicted clearly within the show

On the topic of Armand, what that character means to Anne will shine, so he will gain a more sympathetic role outside of just the IWTV perspective. Both his dark side and his more childish, light-side will be shown

Jim Morrison of The Doors was Anne’s inspiration for Lestat’s singing voice and for the band (I forget but I think this was the song Anne named as being a good example. Though, I’m partial to their sexy song “5 to 1″). She describes Lestat’s voice as somewhere between a “barratone and tenor...Melodic”. (Something about Jon Bon Jovi also a little bit)

Mayfair Witches

Rights of Mayfair Witches not available to them (?) and thus, the crossover books are not a part of the VC TV series and, thus no show for them right now

Maybe Mayfair TV series in future. Anne doesn’t want them to play second fiddle to the vampires

Anne and Chris

They talked about the recent April Fool’s Joke. Anne apologized to Justin Beiber?? Why?? I don’t know (they weren’t behind the joke article)

Chris likes Riverdale (ew)

Chris worked with Anne on Ramses the Damned.

Someone in the VC Discord Server brought up the question of if Chris could/would carry out the VC books after Anne. Based off this interview, I think it’s very likely depending on how well the VC TV series goes. He seemed a little apprehensive about it, but he’s worked with his mother on writing and is familiar enough with her characters to care about them. I think it’s possible

Chris went to the VC balls in New Orleans as a kid

Chris’ A Density of Souls may get a chance to be a film. Chris is in discussion with someone about it (?? that’s what I got from the interview anyways)

*After Anne leaves to get Chris a Coke* Chris *to the camera*: She won’t let me out of the house. She won’t let me leave!! Me: Same

The Facebook Page and Other Information

Anne, yet again, made a little speech about how nerds mean a lot to Hollywood nowadays

“Readers know things about the novels that are valuable”

They have a record of fan comments that Anne reads every so often

They mentioned some of the fights going on in the FB thread

(Chris: There are some people with...strong casting choices. Anne: I got into fights with people lmao)

Anne prefers if you message her over the page rather than through emails

They cannot do much about given resumes and asking about jobs related to production. There will be a time for that later

Anne is in contract for two more VC novels. It sounded like her next novel is also included in the TV series’ contract, but I could have misinterpreted.

Anne asks about any regrets or things she would change from the books as she goes into the series. More fleshing out but that’s about it

Disappointing the fans is their biggest concern and worry

#tvc #vc #vampire chronicles #the vampire chronicles #the vampire lestat #lestat #anne rice

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brialavellan · 7 years

Text

ME:A spoilers

People who are more astute than me have written better summaries on the overall game.

Here’s one by @billowsandbreeze (mostly spoiler free)

Here’s another by @saarebitch (has spoilers)

And I agree with them re: game mechanics.

Summary: It feels like the spiritual successor to ME1 (in terms of the positives AND the faults)

But beyond that, I’m gonna just add little thoughts of my own that maybe other people haven’t touched on. Mostly just thoights going through my head as I play.

Under a cut - There are a LOT of story spoilers. Also a very long post.

0. Ok first of all, WHY CAN’T I SAVE???????

I have literally been playing this planetside/Nexus mission for close to 2 hours and NOT ONCE have I been able to actually MANUALLY save the game....what the fuck Bioware??????

I’m sorry, but I don’t like the idea of Bioware choosing when I should save, especially when I save for strategic reasons (i.e. right before a cutscene for vids and screenshots, or right before a major decision, or finishing a major questline).

This is a huge deal. I shouldn’t have to keep playing hoping to find a good point when YOU’LL decide to autosave for me. I’m an adult, sometimes I gotta turn off the game and get back to real life.

Y’all better fix this for the official launch, Bioware. This is a HUGE issue.

1. Liam was a joy from intro to the Nexus (which is as far as I’ve gotten). He’s full of wit and heart in equal measure. I really can’t wait to kiss him. Planetside, the dialogue was fantastic, it was a joy to explore while he was talking - and he talked a lot.

Cora’s far more reserved and professional but she has her shining moments. I got a Miranda vibe from her. I don’t like that - not because I don’t like Miranda, but because I don’t like the idea of someone more qualified than me having the stronger role. Maybe it’d feel less weird if she felt more like a protege - like myself, and less like she could kick my ass back to the Milky Way. She’s already been forged. I would prefer companions that need cooking like myself in this case.

2. The scanner is a pretty fun tool, but I could easily see it becoming a crutch. The first planetside mission did a decent job of balancing scanning with figuring stuff out on your own - I’m worried there might be quite a few side missions where it’s pretty much “scan to solve”. Seeing other playthroughs farther in i.e. Eos - especially before Peebee’s intro confirms my fear of what could happen.

3. The narrative is shaky so far. There were periods where it wasn’t going anywhere, then everything hits you at once. I think the story needs time to find its legs.

4. I don’t like SAM. I’m sorry, I just don’t. He’s a useful tool, but I’m not digging this “linked to an AI without my consent”. Even if it was to save my life.

------ 4a. I also assume SAM is the reason Cora’s not the Pathfinder even though she’s more qualified. It’s a weak justification tho.

5. I really get the impression I’m a wide-eyed recruit being thrust into the spotlight where I’m not qualified or even eager. Giving me DA:I flashbacks. And it also REALLY makes me believe I should not have been qualified for the Pathfinder team. I’m a newb surrounded by experts.

------5a. I also speak of experiences like dealing with Prothean artifacts. I would have preferred a bit more customization in that regard - a chance to CHOOSE how to respond when Liam asks me questions about my background. I don’t wanna make comparisons to DA:I - they are an entirely different team, but surely if the ME teams can borrow DA writers, they can also take some of the good DA concepts

6. I haven’t really had the chance to be an ass. Or to be angry. Ryder isn’t really my character, and I don’t feel any ownership of her the same way I felt I truly owned my other characters. This might be a side effect of the narrative and personal preference. Unlike most, I prefer vague backstories i.e. the Inquisitor. Maybe this will change over time.

7. Yes, there’s some goofy animations. Look, I like giving Bioware shit for it but at the end of the day, I don’t care. It’s funny. It makes for good reaction images. It’s A+ meme material - you think tumblr would be more forgiving for the memeing potential alone.

It just wouldn’t be Bioware without janky animations - I mean, y’all collectively find game breaking bugs in Bethesda endearing instead of aggravating to no end and absolutely unacceptable for a AAA gaming developer with million dollar budgets, so let Bioware have one “fuck-up” thing.

------ 7a. But I’m gonna be honest. With a non-default Ryder. most of the animations look....fine. There’s some blep moments but for the most part, the game (and the people) are gorgeous. I also did really appreciate seeing a teeny bit more diversity in skin tones and features - in the presets AND the characters. There can always be more, ofc. But my incredibly low expectations have been surpassed....for the moment.

8. The opening narration really sold the “spiritual successor” feel. Narration as stirring, the music was moving, the cinematography excellent - I have actually recorded and replayed the scene just to feel that lil burst of excitement and wonder I felt when I opened the game. I just hope the story catches up....I don’t want the opening credits to be the most exciting thing in the game.

9. Bioware still hasn’t learned that you don’t necessarily have to kill people off to move the story forward but whatever.

10. If Bioware can make me a custom mother for a picture in the Codex, they ALSO could’ve potentially brought her with us. A minor pet peeve but something that bothered me nonetheless.

11. I am SO tired of these white names. It’s not as much of a slap in the face as FO4 where the best I got for MENA names was Aaliyah and Muhammad but we got 5 variations of Fuck and Ass, but really? Scott??? Just one more thing showing that Ryder isn’t REALLY my character in the traditional RP sense.

12. This CC is INCREDIBLY disappointing. I’m 100 percent sure there’s already 50 Ryders that look like mine. I am satisfied enough with her appearance, but I’m really frustrated that I was stuck with the features of whatever preset I chose. When they mentioned DA:I, that was the CC I EXPECTED. What I got was laughable in comparison. However, I can take some heart in seeing presets that weren’t white people.

Also, one half-assed afro and pathetic excuse for cornrows is flat-out OFFENSIVE. Bioware has not listened in 5 years. Black people shouldn’t “wait for a patch” to make their own Ryders.

In conclusion: an enjoyable game with a great cast, a lot of great, well-written (and well voiced dialogue) with combat that’s SUPER fun. I need to look for my controller adapter, because the UI is so clunky, I STILL haven’t gotten used to the controls.

However, this, for me, is not a 60 dollar game, so far. I won’t be hurting if I wait a few months for the price to drop. And I will wait for the price to (inevitably) drop before I buy it.

#game: mass effect andromeda #mass effect andromeda #me:a #long post*

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mercyimagines-blog · 7 years

Text

Telling the Family

PART 2 OF THE WEDDING SERIES

< Part one

Part three>

You and Shawn had kept your engagement quiet for the next week, just wanting to have it sink in that you two were going to do it. You two were going to get married.

You sat up in bed, admiring the glistening diamond on your left ring finger, allowing God to give you a sign that this was still a dream. He never did, which you were truly thankful for.

Shawn had convinced you that sooner or later you had to tell each other’s families and you supposed he was correct about that. Karen just hearing that her son didn’t tell her the day after was already going to crush her, so waiting longer would surely cause her heart to ache. The fans, that would be a different situation. You and Shawn hadn’t discussed when you wanted to tell the fans. Perhaps not even for another couple of weeks.

“Do you think my mom’s gonna be mad at me?” Shawn asks you worriedly, having just gotten out of the shower.

You shake your head, being truthful.

“I think she’s going to be a little sad you didn’t tell her right away, but she’s definitely going to be happy, babe.” You rub your hand on his damp, bare back as he collapses onto the bed in front of you.

“Do you think your mom is going to be mad that you didn’t tell her we were engaged? I mean, I asked her to marry you obviously - but then no one told her if you said yes so...”

“Babe.” You chuckle, getting up from the bed and taking off the necklace you accidentally slept in. “You need to relax.”

“What are you doing?” Shawn asks, coming up behind you in his towel clad body and kissing your shoulder.

“I’m going to take a shower before we head over to your house to tell your family.” You state, heading over to the steamy bathroom where Shawn had been taking one previously.

“You could’ve stepped in the shower with me, babe. I don’t bite.” Shawn winked and ran his hands through his wet hair and you scoff, shaking your head. “Wait!” Shawn says rushedly and runs into the bathroom to look at himself in the mirror, fixing his hair.

You were going to spend the rest of your life with this goofball and you wouldn’t want it any other way.

As Shawn parked his Jeep in front of his family home in Pickering, where he no longer resides, you couldn’t help but notice the way his hands shook.

Instead of saying anything, you take his hand in yours and place a light kiss to the back of it, trying to ease his nerves. As you do so, your ring hits the streetlights causing you to glance at it - butterflies every time.

You both stepped up to the door and knock before entering, Aaliyah the first one you see.

She runs towards you two, giving Shawn a big hug first, and then giving you one.

Karen and Manny emerge from the kitchen where they had been cooking together and you could only hope that your marriage with Shawn was like theirs.

“We are so happy you two wanted to come over for dinner! We’ve missed you both, even though we say you about a week ago. Come on in, dinner is almost ready.” Karen smiles, her accent coming off very thick tonight.

Shawn and you take off your coats, and he smirks at you. Shawn had told you earlier that you were better off telling them at the beginning otherwise, they would see the ring and ask questions.

“Mum, dad, Aaliyah, we have something to tell you.” Shawn says, getting the attention of his family.

You sent him a nervous glance, but keep your left hand behind you.

Karen stopped and looked at Manny expectantly, then looked back at you, crossing her arms over her chest.

“Well, go on then, spit it out.”

You bit your lip and slowly reveal your left hand to your soon to be in-laws.

“Oh my god!” Karen squealed and Aaliyah’s jaw dropped.

Manny just looked at his son, shocked and not knowing what to say.

Karen comes up to you and hugs you both, kissing her son’s face.

“I can’t believe this!” Karen says, still so shocked.

“Congratulations, welcome to the family, Y/N. I mean, you’re almost a Mendes, but you’ve always been family to us.” Manny says, hugging you.

“Thank you, Manny.”

Aaliyah still hasn’t said anything yet, but she comes up to you and lifts up your hand - staring at the ring her brother got you.

“That diamond looks massive!” She exclaims and looks towards Shawn. “How much did you pay for that?”

“Liyah, really?” Shawn asks, rolling his eyes.

“Uh, yeah, because I think I should be getting some of that.” She rubs her fingers together jokingly and Shawn pushes her lightly, laughing.

“This is such great news, oh my god! Alright, well, Y/N, when are we talking wedding details? I would love to help!” Karen smiles.

She grabs onto your hand and examines the ring herself, in awe.

“You are going to be the first one I call when I start thinking about it, okay, Karen?” You reassure her and she nods, giving you another hug.

Let’s just say, dinner was all wedding talk and it gave you a warm fluttery feeling, this was truly happening.

You met your mother for lunch when you told her.

Unfortunately, Shawn was stuck in the studio and he wasn’t able to come, but you almost thought it was better this way.

“Sweetheart, this is such wonderful news!” Your mother wipes her lips on her napkin. “I can’t believe I’m saying this, but when you two first got together - Karen told me she was expecting you to be the one for Shawn.”

You smiled at the thought of Karen saying that to your mother and took another bite of your panini.

“I’m sorry your father couldn’t be here to see this.”

You slowly put your sandwhich down, not hungry anymore. Just the mere thought of your father was eough to ruin your mood for the next couple of days - not to mention your wedding.

“Yeah, well, maybe he shouldn’t have left us. So, it doesn’t matter.” You snap, angry that she brought that up.

Her lips wiggle as she averts her gaze and sets down her fork.

“So, have you and Shawn picked a date yet?” She takes a sip of her iced tea, her light eyes looking at you kindly.

Your eyes almost bulge out of when you hear her say those things.

“Date?”

Shawn sat upside down on the couch with his head hanging down by the floor - blood rushing to his forhead as his forehead crinkled.

You sat criss-crossed on the floor beside him, on you laptop. Your hair was in a messy bun as the sweatpants you took from Shawn’s drawer, bunched at the bottom due to him being taller than you.

It was nearing eleven-thirty, but what your mother said to you really got you.

“I really want a fall or winter wedding.” Shawn said, slightly strained due to being upside down.

“I would love that too, but why?”

His brown eyes narrow as he looks at you, “why are you asking why if you want that too?”

You shrug, looking at different style ideas for your save the date.

“What if we got married like December second or somewhere before the tenth.”

“Why before?”

“Because everyone has stuff to do for Christmas after.”

Well, this was true.

“What if we meet in the middle? Decemeber fifth.”

Shawn smiles, liking the sound of that.

“December fifth it is.”

“Okay, well...we have a date now.” You say in awe.

“How’s the save the dates coming?” Shawn asks.

You managed to create some save the dates that are plain white with large cursive that said: “save the date.” It faded into a cute picture of you two that lighty faded into the rest of the words.

The rest, was all under your names.

Y/N Y/M/N

and

SHAWN PETER RAUL MENDES

are getting married!

Pickering, Ontario

December 5, 2017

You turned your laptop towards Shawn who saw it and rolled over, so he was no longer upside down.

“I love it, babe. It’s all coming together, this is really happening.”

You smile at him and lean in to kiss him.

“It’s all really happening.”

You could say that again.

requests are closed at the moment!

guys I am so excited for the rest of the series and I hope you are too!!

#shawn mendes imagine #shawn mendes #shawn peter raul mendes #shawn mendes imagines #shawn imagine #shawn mendes fanfic #shawn fanfic #shawn mends blurb #shawn blurb #magcon #magcon imagines

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