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simplysable · 1 year

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My thoughts while playing New Vegas for the first time

#fallout #fallout games #reactions #fallout new vegas #new vegas #fnv meme #vulpes inculta #caesar’s legion #new california republic #ncr #daily search trends

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simplysable · 2 years

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Resident Evil Characters as Pictures in My Phone- Pt. 2

Alcina Dimitrescu

Donna Beneviento

Salvatore Moreau

Karl Heisenberg

The Duke

Mother Miranda

And, as a treat,

Ethan Winters

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simplysable · 2 years

Note

How would the Four Lords react to S/O who bakes really extravagant things for them?

Genuinely none of them would know what to do and I’m here for it

Resident Evil Lords With an S/O Who Loves to Bake 🧁

Alcina Dimitrescu

It’s two in the morning, what idiot maid is making a racket in her kitchen-!

Oh it’s you!

Why are you being so loud in her kitchen, of all places?

She sees you shove some bowls behind your back

“Nothing to see here, Alcina! Nothing! You should go back to bed, like, now!”

You were acting odd, but she was exhausted from her meeting with Miranda earlier in the day

“Okay, I will, but I want an explanation for this in the morning. Be quiet, please.”

She got an explanation in the morning

“Miranda was being a bitch, and the girls weren’t helping, so I decided to make you a cake to cheer you up. Surprise?”

Alcina was, in fact, surprised

You stayed up making this all night

And it was gorgeous

It looked like a goddamn wedding cake

Three tiers, fully frosted and decorated with little flowers

“Darling, you made this for me? Oh thank you! You must be exhausted! Come, take a break.”

She had no idea what to do

You made this for her? With your own two hands? And you took hours out of your night to make it instead of sleeping???

You baffled her

She loved you so much

She cooked you a huge dinner that night and praised your cake when you ate dessert

The girls ate that shit in minutes

God she loves you, and she wants you to know it

Donna Beneviento

…were those macaroons on the counter?

With little cursive Ds written in chocolate on top of them?

And a few set aside with little As on them?

You need to drag her out of her room because of how flustered she was (she hid)

Donna is the definition of bashful

She has no idea what to do with this! No one makes her things, especially not you!

She’s supposed to make you things, not the other way around!

Angie expresses Donna’s true emotions, much to your satisfaction (and Donna’s dismay)

“Hon, these things are the best things EVER! You need to make them more! Oh oh! You should make some for Heisy-weisy and put some special herbs in them!”

“…you know what I mean, right? We’re making the metal man get STONED!”

Donna hastily shoves her hand over Angie’s mouth to make her stop talking

It does not stop you from laughing

Or from planning

Donna really is thankful, though

She’s so happy that she found someone so amazing that would go out of their way to make macaroons for her

She’s smitten

Absolutely smitten

And a little embarrassed

Salvatore Moreau

Something wasn’t right

Not that something was wrong, per se, but something was just… different

The lake didn’t smell like it normally did

It was lacking the normal amount of stank, in Sal’s opinion

It almost smelled… sweet??

He followed the smell

And promptly broke down crying

There you were, in his gross kitchen, wearing an apron that Donna made for you

Holding a fresh, wonderful, dozen doughnuts, all glazed and frosted

You just fuckin.. made this for him!?? What-

You turned around, looked at your doughnuts sadly, and asked, “are you allergic to gluten?”

After stopping the flow of tears, Sal explained that no, he wasn’t allergic to gluten, he was just surprised

How did you even make this? And why did you make them for him?

Turns out, you had been requesting specific baking supplies from the Duke, and you stealthily hid everything until you were ready to bake

“But- but why would you do something for me? I’m so.. gross! I don’t want your wonderful treats to go to waste!”

You set down the box, walked over to him, and gave him a lil smooch on the forehead

“I made them because I know you have a sweet tooth, and because I love you, Sal! Do you think I would spend all that lei on baking supplies for someone I hated?”

He tearfully smiled, sat down with you, and ate the best damn doughnuts he ever had

He had no idea how to express his sincere gratitude and surprise other than showering you in compliments

He loves you, so, so much

“Wait, love, how much did you spend on the supplies?”

Aaaaand the waterworks are staring again

Karl Heisenberg

What in the hell was getting the lycans so worked up?? In his fucking kitchen, no less

They normally kept their dumb noses is places where they were supposed to be

But in his kitchen? And this hyper?

He thinks the fuck not

Karl storms in there, hammer blazing and bashing any lycans that were in his way

“What the hell is going on in here? Scram! Go the fuck away! Leave before I turn you into a soldat! Oh, what?”

You were in the kitchen, swarmed by a horde of lycans that were acting like puppies, feeding them something

“Oh, hey Heis. Sorry, I couldn’t get them out.”

“Well what the fuck were they doing in here in the first place?”

“They smelled the cookie batter and came running.”

“The what?”

He was confused

Why were you making cookies? The last time Miranda had them at their “meetings” they tasted like ass

Why were you baking ass

After you explaining that cookies normally don’t taste like ass, you shoved one in his mouth

He was pissed

But then very happy (even thought he didn’t really show it)

You made these for him? Well, he’s happy he picked such a babe to be his partner for life

“Hey, thanks! I’m gonna show these to Miranda and tell her how bad hers were.”

He loves your cookies

And so do the lycans

Hope you like the baking headcanons! Sorry this took so long to post!

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simplysable · 2 years

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Useless Technoblade Headcanons to Soothe the Soul

He can transform! He can be human one second with the pink hair, gold glasses and earrings, and then poof he’s a more of a humanoid piglin (the kind that cc!Techno says he likes in fanart)

He knows how to dance on pointe

He actually has a very green thumb, and tries to cover every available surface in at least one potted plant

He’s a very tactile person but because of the whole “Blood God” image, he doesn’t show it

He goes in Tommy’s old room under his house sometimes when the voices get really loud and he shoves his snout in Tommy’s old blankets

He misses his little brother more than he would ever be willing to say

Because he and Wilbur are twins, Techno normally stays in his piglin form while Wilbur stays more human so they can be more different than they already are

He once turned human in front of Tommy while he was recovering from exile and made him cry because he looks exactly like Wilbur

He’s a giggly drunk and only likes red wine

He knows how to play several instruments- he likes the calluses and it makes the voices quiet

Speaking of the voices, when they’re being very agreeable (so not very often), he can switch through certain voices like a radio

Because of his two idiot brothers, he says he hates musicals, but he loves them just as much (if not more) than his brothers

It’s not uncommon to hear “The Music of the Night” ringing through the cabin on a slow day

He’s sung the entirety of Hamilton for Dream more times than he can count because it pissed him off

Has tiny tattoos and scars all over his body

He’ll avoid water whenever possible because his piglin, Nether-lookin-ass wasn’t built for that

He needs to wear reading glasses

He steals Phil’s glasses

And Wilbur’s glasses

He forces Tommy to wear glasses because he knows he needs them

Sometimes he hoards fire res potions and then takes a dip in the lava lakes of the Nether

Throws snowballs at Phil at any given opportunity

I hope you enjoyed this nonsense

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simplysable · 2 years

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The Madrigals as Pictures in my Phone

Abuela:

Pepa:

Dolores:

Camilo:

Antonio:

Bruno:

Julieta:

Isabela:

Luisa:

Mirabel:

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simplysable · 2 years

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Resident Evil Characters as Pictures in My Phone

Alcina Dimitrescu

Donna Beneviento

Salvatore Moreau

Karl Heisenberg

The Duke

Mother Miranda

There’s no fucking reason I made this

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simplysable · 2 years

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Sick Resident Evil Lords and Their S/O Because I Crave Hurt/Comfort

Alcina Dimitrescu

She says that she’s fine, but she, in fact, is not

She and her daughters do the same thing when they’re sick so you could see through that facade in a heartbeat

She was a little flushed, hiding a sniffle, and drinking water instead of tea, wine, or coffee

“My darling, I’m telling you, I’m fine. Stop your fretting and let me work!”

Alcina tries to work, she really does, but you do Not let her

She’s angry with you? Too bad she’s getting bed rest

She’s missing an urgent meeting with Mother? Fuck off they can reschedule

Her daughters won’t leave her alone? They can get sick too for all you care you just need to keep them in one place so they 1.) don’t infect the household and 2.) get better successfully

“How could you tell I was sick? I hid it so well!”

“Alcina, love, you’re wearing a summer dress in winter while being covered in blankets, you’re flushed, and you feel like a furnace. You’re sick.”

“…Well say ‘I told you so’ already and get over here so I can smother you in sick affection.”

Donna Beneviento

She’s better at hiding it than Alcina, but you can still tell

Some of your medicinal herbs and tonics have gone missing, and Donna seems to be requesting you cook soup more often than anything else

Angie is also more docile, and you can hear her complaining from across the manor about a stuffed nose (even though she doesn’t breathe)

While she’s drinking tea or making a doll, you can hear her sniffles and sneezes

“Y/N, if you’re about to say something, you can shove it up your- ACHOO!”

At Angie’s extremely convincing message, you take matters into your own hands

You shut off the sanding machines, you hide the polish and the paint, you hide the screws and the bolts so Donna can’t make any more dolls

You drag her miserable self to bed while she holds Angie like a child’s toy

“I don’t need any help, my love. You don’t know how to heal me, even if it is just a cold.”

You couldn’t heal her her way, is what she meant

You knew this, so you paid a visit to the Duke

In a smiley face shopping bag he gave you was Benadryl, ibuprofen, Motrin, Advil, Vicks VapoRub, and every other over the counter drug you could buy

“Welcome to the world of twenty-first century medicine, Donna!”

Salvatore Moreau

He’s sick all the time, and he’s reassured you that at this point it’s normal for him to have a trash can at every door (just in case)

You didn’t like it, but he was right

You learned to not freak out when new piles of green acid-like substances showed up, but still, not a fan on your part

This was different, you could tell

Instead of vomiting, he was sneezing and blowing his nose constantly, coughing wetly and trying to hide it

“Darling, I’m fine, it’s just a result of the cadou. Mother can fix it at our next meeting.”

No she goddamn couldn’t it was cold season and Salvatore had obviously caught it

You don’t care if it was a “very important meeting” (it was just Mother Miranda mourning her kid and whining about needing a vessel), Sal was staying home

You slap a warm towel over his eyes, make a blanket cocoon, and make him wriggle in there

“Salvatore, I love you, and you’re sick. This is what sick people do to get better. I’ll be at the Duke’s to get some hot soup, you stay here, alright?”

With a grumble (and a smile) from him, you leave, but not before doing the “I’m watching you” move at him

He has no idea how he got so lucky

Karl Heisenberg

This idiot pushes himself so much that he simply chooses to ignore the fact that he’s sick

Either that or he has a Man Cold™️ and there is no in between (for the sake of fluff, I’m going with the first option)

In all honesty, you mistake him for a soldat at first because he’s so dead on his feet

You roll your eyes, grab any sharp object Heisenberg has lying around and prepare to McStab, but then you see the gleam in his glasses and put down the sharp thing

“Jesus, Heis, I was about to stab you! You look dead on your feet.”

At this point he is, but he doesn’t tell you that

You can see that for yourself

When he turns around, his eyes are red and puffy, and he’s paler than normal

He’s also shaking like a dog but you can’t tell because of how many layers he’s wearing

“You couldn’t stab me very well with a fork, hun. Nice try, though.”

You throw it at him and hold his hand, dragging him out of the hot factory area and bringing him to his room

He’s too hot and too cold at the same time, and he’s too tired to say no to being coddled

“Dumbass.”

You watch him while he sleeps and are always at his side, making sure he doesn’t get up and start working again

He pretends to hate it when he’s better, but he’s so touch starved he doesn’t protest to being coddled very much

Hope you liked the sickness, and I hope that you’re not sick reading this! If so, drink water. Also, at this moment, my requests are closed, but I’ll be going through my previous asks when quarantine eventually starts again. Hope you liked it, and stay safe!

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simplysable · 2 years

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Because I’ve been extremely inactive I’m going to give y’all a smorgasbord of useless RE8 headcanons

Alcina Dimitrescu

She has the entirety of The Raven by Edgar Allen Poe mesmerized

Knows how to tap dance

Talks shit about Mother Miranda with Heisenberg if she’s having a bad day

She likes her daughters to polish her claws because it makes her feel like a cat getting pet

Can and will put her adult daughters in time out for doing something stupid

Has, for some fucking reason, has met a president of the United States

She likes Billie Holiday

Listens to any new music she can get her hands on and listens to it until she knows all the words

Fascinated with the Black Plague

She picks Heisenberg up by the scruff of his neck if he’s being a little shit

She really wants to go to California because of their famous wine

Gossips with the Duke

Donna Beneviento

If she ever gets out of the village unscathed, she would be the biggest FNAF fan you’ve ever seen

She likes to read really smutty romance novels (not Fifty Shades, that’s pussy shit in her humble opinion)

Prefers hot chocolate over tea

She knits sweaters for the little bats that make their home in her attic

Very afraid of the dark

She likes to dress up and twirl in the mirror sometimes so she can feel pretty

Pink is her favorite color

Even though they’re her mourning clothes for her beloved family, she gets sick of the black

Poinsettias are her favorite flowers

She likes conspiracy theories

She gets sick of Mother Miranda faster than Heisenberg but she hides it better

She needs glasses

She buys the Harry Potter books from the Duke and loves them (she’s a Ravenclaw)

Salvatore Moreau

Friends fan

He likes murder mystery novels and shows

Owns an “I’m Sherlock-ed” tee shirt

He’s afraid of bunnies

He likes Disney movies, and The Hunchback of Notre Dame is his favorite

Knows all the words to Smells Like Teen Spirit

He collects stuffies and buys them whenever the Duke has them

Would spend hours a day on Minecraft of one of Chris’ men had it on their computers

Dear Theodosia is the only Hamilton song he knows, but it’s still his favorite

The clicking of Mother Miranda’s goats annoys him

Interested in the American civil war

Karl Heisenberg

Can play the keytar

Very good at Guitar Hero

His favorite video game is Animal Crossing, and his favorite villager is Bluebear

One time he went to Mother Miranda when he was sick just because he wanted to be held

He owns two sphinx cats and named them Fluffy and Fuzzy

He likes to make music boxes

Michelle by Sir Chloe hits a little bit too close to home

Borrowed HP from Donna, said he hated it, is actually a bigger fan than she is (Slytherin. This man is the most Slytherin bitch I’ve ever seen)

He likes armadillos

He’s a smart idiot

His favorite movie is Home Alone

Hates origami because he can’t manipulate the paper like he can metal and his calluses get in the way

He likes flowery candles

Here’s your nonsense merry Christmas

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simplysable · 2 years

Note

I would like to make a request. How the lords would react if they kill their significant other by accident?

(they bring them back at the end of the Day, dont worry)

Have a nice Dayor Night!

:0 you NAUGHTY wackus bonkus! Major character death? Angst? Oh fuck yeah you asked the right person bb

How the Resident Evil Lords Would React to Accidentally Killing Their S/O (And Brings Them Back)💀

Alcina Dimitrescu

TW- mention of getting chopped in half like Darth Maul, but nothing graphic, no worries

She was furious.

Mother Miranda took that fool’s side on yet another argument, and she was brushed aside

She had good ideas! She wanted to help in any way she could! Why couldn’t Mother Miranda see that?

You had accompanied her on this meeting, as Mother Miranda liked you and found you interesting

To snare the heart of the heartless? And to be smart on top of it? You were welcome to come to the meetings

You were leaving with Alcina, giving her some space when Karl came up next to you and wrapped a hand around your waist

(You weren’t thrown off by this, Karl was actually very physically affectionate!)

“I knew Mother Miranda made the right decision. I wouldn’t trust a tall vampire bitch either!”

That was enough for her

She growled, took out her claws, and swung at Heisenberg’s middle

But she didn’t know you were right next to him

She thought you were talking with Salvatore like you normally did

She sliced you clean in half, terror in her eyes as she watched you collapse to the ground

The roar she let out shook the mountains

She was beside herself, not even threats from Mother Miranda could calm her

“I’m bringing them back, I will!”

She pulled herself (and you lol) together enough to go to her basement and dig up some old books of hers

After a long, tense procedure, she waited at your bedside, your skin now unnaturally pale and your breathing extremely shallow

She was crying, holding your hand and muttering “please work, please, please”

Alcina didn’t know what to do if you were gone, you were the light of her life- what kept her going

You stirred, shocking her as you coughed up a fly

You looked at her, and looked at the scar wrapping around your middle

Alcina burst into tears

“My dear, I’m sorry, my anger got the better of me and I acted without looking or thinking! I hurt you, I killed you, and I brought you back as well as I could. I’m so sorry, my love, I’m so sorry!”

You coughed again, and another fly left your mouth

“Am I like the girls now?”

Alcina nodded silently

“…cool.”

Oh thank god, you were just fine

“I know this will take some getting used to, but I can’t live without you, I can’t!”

You held her hand, smiling

“It’s okay, I understand. There’s nothing to worry about, I’m back and I’m here to stay. Can you teach me how to fly?”

Donna Beneviento

TW- you fall off a cliff

Oh this was all her fault

This was all her fault

She was testing her hallucinations, making her pollens stronger because of the man-thing Mother talked about

She thought she closed the doors to her workspace, she did!

She didn’t

Her pollen was in your lungs, in your mind, intoxicating you

What you saw, you ran from it

You ran, and you looked back at the monster chasing you, and it had three sets of large, black wings and a bronze halo

Looking back at it, at her, the source of your friend’s misery, you fell

Right off the edge of the cliff that Donna’s manor was perched on

When Donna found you, maybe days later, she was silent

She stayed silent as she crashed down next to you, as she hit the ground, as she cried

She ripped her veil off and put it over your face, blocking your blank stare

She brought you inside and put you on her bed, and she just… stayed

Donna was by your side for days, weeping and staring silently as she rubbed your hand

Angie was there too, quiet, for once, as they grieved

…Angie

If Donna could put a part of her in a doll, then surely she could put a part of you in a doll, too!

You didn’t have a cadou, but she could manage

She brought you down to her lab, using her pollens and intricate procedures to extract your soul and put it into a doll of your exact likeness

It was scary to her, seeing you silent and still, carved by her own hand

Your wooden eyes clanked open, and you looked at Donna happily

When you talked, your mouth moved like Angie’s, but your voice stayed the same

“Donna, what happened? The last thing I remember is Miranda chasing me.”

That’s what you saw?

“My love, because of my hallucinations, you ran away from the house and fell off the cliff. I had to bring you back, I had to! I’m so sorry, please forgive me!”

You, still testing out your beautiful oak limbs, reached out to Donna and smiled

“If I’m a doll, then we can be together forever, right?”

Salvatore Moreau

TW- mentions of vomit, but nothing graphic because no thank you

Oh he didn’t know what to do

He was in his mutated form, and you came up behind him, a small meal in your hands

“Sal, do you want to talk about it?”

He whirled around, anger in his eyes

“No! Please give me some space!”

While he turned around, he slapped you with his long tail, sending you flying into the mountainside

You hit the rock with a dull thud, and fell into the ground, lifeless

“Dear?”

He looked for you, behind him, ready to apologize, but he just saw you, tens of feet away, dead

“My dear! Y/N! Oh no, no, no, this can’t be happening!”

Salvatore scooped you up gently and caressed your blank face

He doesn’t waste any time in trying to help you

He can grieve if this doesn’t work

Salvatore runs through the village in his monster form, uncaring that everybody is staring in horror

He runs to the church where Mother Miranda is waiting to hold a meeting, and he grovels at her feat

“Mother, please, Mother! Please bring them back, please! I’ll do anything, anything!”

Miranda had no desire to help Salvatore or you, but if she did, she would gain even more worship from the village and Salvatore

Plus she thought you were funny, and she liked that you were the only one brave enough to poke fun at her in good fun

“..fine. Bring them here.”

Salvatore was beside himself while Miranda put a cadou in you

He was crying, sobbing, retching, yelling, all in remorse because of what he did

It was his fault! It was an accident!

After hours and hours of crying, Miranda led him into her lab and brought him to the table

“Oh thank you Mother, thank you so much. I’ll worship you, you’re the greatest, Mother!”

She just left him alone with you

You, who now had gills and webbed fingers, who’s back was now just a bit more hunched than before

You smelled like he did, he could tell

“Uh, Sal, what happened?”

Your voice was like his! Oh no, oh no no no!

“My love, I’m so sorry! I hit you with my tail, and you died after you hit the rock! Mother put a cadou and you, and she made you suffer like me!”

He cried as you turned over and retched, a familiar green sludge coming out of your mouth

“Is this what you have to deal with every day? Oh Sal, it was an accident.”

How could you forgive him so easily? He was practically dying inside because of what he did to you

“Salvatore, listen to me. It was an accident. We can be together now, and you can tell me how to worship Mother like you do! I have so much to thank her for, show me how to say thank you!”

God, you really were just like him now

“Of course, my love. I’ll show you how to massage your back, as well.”

Karl Heisenberg

TW- a VERY brief mention of suicidal thoughts in the first bullet point, but nothing graphic, also mentions of blood and being skewered to a wall (again, not graphic <3)

Welp. Guess he may as well call it quits-

No, actually, you would kill him yourself if he didn’t already kill you already

He was just so angry, and you were just trying to help! But he had to go and screw that up, too

So now he had to look at you, tear stains on your cheeks as you were pinned to the wall with metal

Metal that he flung at you

He didn’t bother to clean up the blood, that would just make him look at what he did to you

He just looked at you for a couple hours, maybe days

He just… didn’t know what to do

He wandered around the factory, Sturm by his side all the while

Karl found himself at the Duke’s, who was, in all honesty, annoyed

“Heisenberg, is that not an army of the undead behind you?”

….OH

“Thanks Duke, you’re the best!”

“I know.”

Heisenberg stayed up for days trying to figure out how to bring you back without making you a mindless soldier

He did kidnap some of the villagers to test it on, but you didn’t need to know that

He had it down perfectly

He worked on you

He waited

He cried when you woke up, looking perfectly yourself, only with some new metal parts here and there

Karl Heisenberg didn’t let you go

Hope you liked this!! I feel like I did how they brought you back more than the reactions, but hey, I still liked how it came out. Request more things, if you will!

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simplysable · 2 years

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I lost the post because I accidentally deleted the draft instead of posting it, but the request was asking how the Resident Evil lords would react if their S/O was screaming for their help, but instead of something deadly, it was a little bug. This one goes out to all my arachnophobes <3

How Resident Evil Lords Would React to Their S/O Screaming for Them… Because of a Spider 🕷

Alcina Dimitrescu

“Alcina! Alcina, please help! It’s gonna kill me!”

You just wanted to break open a nice vintage that was in the kitchen, but then you saw it

Oh Jesus Mary and Joseph you were gonna die

The spider was fucking HUGE

It had so many legs.. and too many fucking EYES-

You didn’t think a Romanian tarantula would manage to worm its way into the castle but it’s here and you’re petrified

“Alcina!”

Alcina bursts in, claws unsheathed and golden eyes murderous

She looks around the room, sees nothing except for you, white as a sheet, staring at something in the room

She bends down to you, claws still out, and tucks you into her side

“What’s wrong, dearest? Was it the man-thing Mother Miranda was talking about? A stray lycan? Heisenberg?”

She was ready to kill any of the three options in a heartbeat

You, the light of her light, pointed to the corner of the room and trembled in fear

…it was a spider

You screamed for her, terror in your voice, because of a spider

She pats you on the head and goes to the spider, scooping it in her hands and throwing it out the window

She just kinda looks at you

“Listen, Alcina, I’m sorry for overreacting, but spiders terrify me. I have the diagnosed phobia and everything! Sorry if I made you worry, but-”

She was a little annoyed at first, but you really did have a diagnosed phobia of spiders

“My dear, there’s nothing to worry about. Next time, simply yell for a spider.”

Donna Beneviento

Donna was MORE than ready to make anyone who dares hurt you have the worst high of their life

Torture, murder, close family member’s deaths, paper cuts dipped in lemon juice hallucinations were just the tip of the iceberg

She heard you scream for your help, and she sent Angie in to see if you were hurt

“HaHAHAHAHAHA! Donna, you gotta see this, I’m dying!”

Donna stepped into the room and saw Angie on the floor, howling with laughter and pointing at you

You were in the corner of the room, shock-still, tears streaming down your cheeks and skin paling as a Romanian tarantula climbed over your head

She could sense the panic attack from all the way over there

She stepped over Angie and gently took the spider off your head, throwing it out the window calmly

She frowned at Angie, who was still laughing, and she crouched down in front of you

“It’s alright, my love. It’s gone now.”

Donna practically carries you to your rooms, and she lays you down as you come down from the adrenaline

“Wait here. I’ll set something up that kills any spiders that dare cross into our home.”

She did that

She ALSO had a very stern talking to with Angie, who was very guilty afterwards

Salvatore Moreau

He feels so bad that you’re so afraid of a little spider

You’re not afraid of him, but you’re afraid of a spider?

It confuses him, but he doesn’t make fun of you for it

Actually, he tries to make you see that spiders aren’t that bad

“See, love? I’ll just move him over here, there! He’s not doing anything.”

Sal will get books from Alcina or Donna all about spiders and tell you all the good things they do

“A lot of spiders eat mosquitoes! I know you don’t like those, either, so that’s good!”

“This one, right here, is very fluffy, and they get scared very easily. I don’t think it could hurt you if it tried.”

If you’re still really wary of spiders and ask him to stop because he’s scaring you, then all the books are gone

He buys weird spider repellent from the Duke

He lets in an extremely strange lycan who, for some reason, only likes to eat spiders, into his land

There will be NO spiders in this place, thank you very much

“I’m sorry love, I just wanted you to feel more comfortable with them.”

He tried to make you less afraid and that’s what made you feel better

Karl Heisenberg

He comes in running, every sharp piece of metal floating around him as he looks for what’s attacking you

“Kit, what is it? It’s in the corner- OH WHAT THE FUCK!?”

Turns out that Karl Heisenberg

A man who uses dead bodies in his experiments

And on occasion for fun

Who has the ability to manipulate metal

Has an army at his disposal

And is arguably the most fearsome lord in the village

Is afraid of spiders

He THROWS every piece of metal at the spider and hauls you over his shoulder, not looking back

“Kit, we’re staying in Alcina’s basement for the next week so I can have the place checked for spiders. I can afford it, don’t worry.”

Alcina was not pleased to find Heisenberg in her wine cellar (you, she could tolerate)

“Honestly, Heisenberg, you’re acting like a child! Go back to your damned factory and do whatever it is you do. You Y/N, are free to come over whenever you like.”

Both of you just kinda… huddled together for the rest of the day, looking for spiders

“Heis, is that a spider?”

*metal goes flying*

“No, that was a dust bunny.”

“So, spiders, huh?”

“Shut your mouth Kit, you acted the same way.”

After the factory is declared spider-free, you go to the Duke to buy a fly swatter, hairspray, and a lighter

“Ah! Would you be interested in this fine memory?”

The Duke has somehow got a picture of you and Heisenberg huddled together on your bed, covered in fluffy blankets, terrified, in a silver picture frame

“Free of charge!”

I hope you like this, and sorry for taking a while! Spiders! Ew! My asks are still open, btw <3

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simplysable · 2 years

Note

May I request how the ladies of Village remember their first meeting with their S/O who crash landed in the village and is dangling from their parachute high up?

Sure thing! Thanks for the odd request, love it! Sorry if I don’t do the Dimitrescu daughters justice, I don’t know their characters well enough. Here you go!

Resident Evil Ladies Meeting you for the First Time… In a Tree 🪂

(Just some backstory for it to make some sense!)

You were a pilot of your own small aircraft, and you were taking a video of the Romanian countryside for a tourist company that hired you. It was supposed to be a normal flight on a bright summer day, but a malfunction on the plane sent you careening downward. You deployed your parachute and fell into the woods, and you knew no more.

Meeting Alcina Dimitrescu

She was surprised, to say the least

She was going out for a stroll, but a bright bit of yellow and red fabric caught her eye

To find a human, dangling in a tree, half conscious, stuck

And there you were, blinking down at her dazedly

“My, my, what happened here? The last time I checked, humans can’t fly.”

You shrugged, still dangling

“I didn’t fly; I fell.”

That made the strangely tall, pale, extremely beautiful woman with gorgeous golden eyes and perfect red lips smile

“Do you need help, human? You look like a bug caught in a web.”

“Yes, please.”

Alcina was surprised when you didn’t flinch at her claws cutting the parachute, in fact, you seemed excited to see her claws

“Those are so cool!”

Alcina is grinning as she helps you out of the tree, setting you gently on the ground

Her frown faltered when you flinched

“You’ve hurt your leg, poor thing. My maids can patch you up.”

She was going to use you for wine, but her mind changed as you kept talking about her and asking her questions

“When you take your claws out, do they cut your skin? I think I have bandaids in one of these pockets.”

“You said you have maids. Do you live in a palace or something?”

Turns out, she did have a palace

After patching you up, she had the maids make tea, her cup smelling suspiciously metallic

“Tell me, you little thing, who are you?”

You talked into the night, only stopping when the sun came up

Bela, Daniela, and Cassandra Dimitrescu

They just wanted to hunt lycans in the nice summer heat, but they would totally be fine killing a weirdo in a tree !!

You, coming to, see these three young girls with sickles raising them to your chest

You, now much more awake but still drowsy, were now panicking in your tree branch cocoon

“What the fuck?!” Is the only thing that can leave your mouth

The brunette cracks up, the blonde and the redhead stare

The brunette, Cassandra, as you would learn later, slashes the ropes keeping you aloft, and snickers as you fall to the floor

“How did a human find their way all the way out here? In a tree, of all places?”

The three of them circle you, their sickles still drawn

“Cassandra, before we kill them, we could ask them questions.”

“Like what, dumbass? We can’t torture for information if they don’t have any to give or any we need.”

“We can ask about the modern world, and what’s happened!”

That snatched the sadistic girl’s attention, making her draw her sickle away from your chest

You scramble to a tree, backed up against the trunk as you stare at these abnormally pale girls with face tattoos and red stains on their lips

Yeah you can answer questions

You don’t wanna get stabbed by pretty ladies at the moment

You open and close your mouth like a fish, quietly asking what do they want to know

Cassandra squats down in front of you, and you can smell the blood on her lips, you brace yourself, but all she does is ask you one question

“What’s a Disney? I heard Sal mention something about that once, and it’s been killing me cause I don’t know what it is.”

That was not the question you were expecting

You explained still nervous, and eventually the movies came into the conversation

The other sisters, Bela and Daniela, sat down next to you, and you gladly explained everything they asked you to as long as their sickles stayed away

You were still afraid of them, but they were fascinating (and beautiful)

You wouldn’t mind staying in the village for a while

Donna Beneviento

She was going out to the walkway of her manor to clean the dolls hanging in her tree

But then she saw something much larger than a doll in her tree

It was you

A human, wrapped in a bright cloth and ropes, was hanging in her tree, wide awake and squirming

As soon as you saw her, you wriggled in the ropes

“Excuse me! Ma’am! Can you help me out of the tree? My plane probably went down in a forest or something, shit.”

She watched you struggle in fascination, the dolls around your head almost leaning towards you because of the breeze (or was that Donna’s curiosity?)

A sudden gust of wind blew past you, and you paused your struggling as Donna’s veil was swept away

Dear lord that’s the prettiest woman you’ve ever seen

Was it getting hot in the tree? You think it’s getting hot in the tree

You had no idea why someone so gorgeous would hide such a face

Donna, however, was mortified

She was sinking to her knees, grasping the veil on her head and yanking it down

She was close to hyperventilating

She wished she didn’t start Angie’s repairs

She needed Angie

You drew her attention, oblivious to her internal dilemma

“‘Scuse me? Uh, pretty lady? Can you please get me down from here? There was something shiny in the bushes and I wanna see what it is.”

…did you call her pretty?

“Yeah, I called you pretty! Have you looked in a mirror?”

Donna blushed under her veil, bringing a hand to her forehead

Donna cut you down and watched as you brushed yourself off, and blushed harder as your own face flushed when you looked in her direction

“Thank you. So, uh, what’s your name?”

“…Donna. Donna Beneviento.”

Mother Miranda

She was searching the village as the townspeople cowered in their houses, thinking about what citizens could survive a cadou experiment

She was looking to the horizon, thinking only of her daughter, when a flash of red caught her eye

She flew to you gracefully, landing in front of you silently

There you were

As a specimen, you looked perfect

Exactly what she was looking for

And quite attractive, if she was being honest

She saw you start to wake up, and she cut the chords you were strung up in, catching you in her arms

She plucked a stray feather out of her wings, gently caressing your face with it

“Shhhh, shhhhh, all will be okay. Go back to sleep, I’ll speak with you when you wake up.”

She flew off with you without another word

Maybe you didn’t have to be an experiment, there were many other townsfolk to become a subject

She smiled as she looked at you, asleep, and she knew that she wasn’t going to hurt you, even though she didn’t even know your name

Thanks for the request!! Hope you like the ladies seeing you struggling in a tree 🌲

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simplysable · 2 years

Note

Another request, but this time I'm kinda projecting. The lords with an S/O with a severe pollen allergy because I suffer every spring due to mine 😭

Sure thing! Thanks for another request, and I hope that you find some solace in this from when pollen drowns you in the spring <3 thanks again, and I hope you like it!

Resident Evil Lords With a S/O Who Has a Pollen Allergy 🌼

Alcina Dimitrescu

Oh she feels so awful when she sees you sniffling and sneezing every other minute

Your poor red eyes, your running nose, your scratchy voice, it makes her feel so terrible

She tries to keep the windows shut as much as possible so pollen from her gardens doesn’t get in the house, but it’s simply inevitable

Whenever allergy season rolls around, she has her maids put her house plants outside, just in case

She makes sure you drink lots of water, and even though you might not be physically sick, she makes you stay in bed

“I promise, darling, the repulsive weather will be over soon, and your winter will come around.”

Lots of tea

So much chamomile

She gently holds your hands away from your face as you try to wipe your eyes, making them redder than they already were

“Dearest, I know your eyes itch, but touching them will only make it worse. I’ll get a maid to get a wet cloth to put over your eyes.”

Even though she hates the winter, she can’t wait for it to come so you stop looking so miserable

Donna Beneviento

The manor is surrounded by flowers in the spring, so you’re miserable

There are beautiful flowers in Donna’s home, but you’re eyes are so red and dry you don’t have time to admire them

Donna has control of some of the pollen, but not all of it

“My dear, I’ll move my plants outside and let the pollen air out.”

That, actually, let’s more pollen in

Listen she hasn’t done this before!! The whole “partner” thing!! She doesn’t know what the hell to do, and your tired eyes and scratchy voice certainly aren’t helping

She panics

Her cadou reacts

She creates potent pollen

You trip balls

Angie is cracking up as you sniffle on the bed sadly, giggling drunkenly as you point at the blonde man with three fingers in the corner

“Oh darling, I can fix this. Angie, would you get some water for our dear?”

She mock salutes and toddles off, and Donna forces herself to calm down

When your allergies finally tide over, you laugh as Angie tells you about what you said

“You said this dumb blonde waltzed into the house and got himself killed by a big baby! This is fun, you should get pollen allergies more often!”

Salvatore Moreau

He, as a doctor, knows what to do

Water, tea, humidifiers, blankets, VapoRub from the Duke, the whole shbang

As a partner?

He’s so sad when you’re sick

He holds your hands so you don’t wipe your eyes, and he always carries a handkerchief with him in case you have to sneeze

He has scentless, gentle lotion to put on your red Cupid’s bow from all your nose blowing

As soon as you’re taken care of, he shifts into his mutated form and cried into the sky

“Mother Miranda, make the season pass quicker! Make winter come quickly, please!”

Your tired ass waddles outside in five blankets and leans against him, bonking your head on his tail

“Sal, can you stop yelling at the sky and come watch The Great British Bake-off with me?”

He’s okay with staying inside with you as long as you’re hydrated and well rested

And if that pretentious bitch doesn’t win the episode you’re watching

Karl Heisenberg

He has the same allergies as you, so you’re miserable together

You stay in bed with red eyes and sniffling noses, barely talking because of your sore throats

He doesn’t even yell at Sturm as much because he’s too tired

“Kit, can you yell at Sturm? I don’t wanna.”

You’re the doctor of the household since poor miserable Karl is too tired to do anything

You shuffle to the Duke, looking high as fuck with your red eyes, and you buy everything you need to fix your drama queen

“Ah, I see mister Heisenberg’s allergies have rolled around? Well, now he has someone to share them with.”

You just pay Sturm on the head when you pas him

“Thanks, kit. You’re a lifesaver.”

You become his personal body pillow for however long his allergies last

He’s also your body pillow

Because you’re both miserable

“Heis, it’s your turn to go to the Duke’s.”

“Fuck off, I’m dying.”

This lasts for a month

Hope you like it, you poor allergy ridden bloke! <3

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simplysable · 2 years

Note

Hi, I love your blog so far! How do you think the lords would react to being snowed in?

Absolutely!! Thanks so much for the ask, it might be small, but it’s nice to know people like my nonsense <3

I’m not sure how to do a line break on mobile so you’re getting this long ass list without breaks

The Resident Evil Lords Getting Snowed In (Plus S/O!) ❄️

Alcina Dimitrescu

To put it simply, she hates it.

Because of her cadou, she and her daughters can’t exactly find joy in the snow like you can

“Dearest, would you stay inside? You’re tracking the snow in with you when you come inside.”

You tunnel your way out of the castle like a bunny so you can dick around in the snow while Alcina and her daughters just stare

You try to make her happy, even though she hates the weather with a fiery passion

“At least the fires make it warm in the castle, especially in your chambers!”

“I bet the Duke has hot chocolate and marshmallows. I can show you what cool people do when they get snowed in.”

“Heisenberg can’t get in, right?”

That made her smile, finally.

She thought to herself and smiled, looking out the window happily

“I suppose this disgusting cold isn’t all bad. What are more modern things that people do when they’re trapped?”

Oh she shouldn’t have said that

You drag her to a window while you burrow outside and show her the art of making a snowman

You show her a snowball fight with you and some poor lycan that got stuck in the snow

You ripped a piece of bark off a dead tree and sled down a steep hill, which you didn’t know was steep until you were going too fast

When she was patching you up inside, she smiled at how happy you made her even though she hated what was around her

She doesn’t hate getting snowed in as much now that she has you

Donna Beneviento

Donna loves snow days

She loves that frost delicately covers her windows, and gracefully dusts her trees

The quiet stillness of it is very calming

She isn’t too fond of the cold itself, but she loves the snow (she has a Very Good™️ heating system in her house)

When it snows, she feels as though it’s time for a wardrobe change

She gathers up every doll from every nook and cranny in her house, and she lays them all out in front of you, silent excitement buzzing from her

She asks you to haul out a large chest she has in her room, and you open it with a smile

“It’s their winter clothes. I wanted to make sure that none of them got cold.”

She pulled out Angie’s snow gear, who donned it happily, and you and her got to work changing her dolls into the proper winter attire

“Donna, the craftsmanship on these are gorgeous! You should sell some of your clothes, people would love them!”

Being snowed in, she also can’t escape your compliments

Que a blushing mess at every compliment you give her, no matter how small

“I like the red ribbon on this one. It was a good choice!”

“Aw, the little boots look so warm! Good job, Donna!”

“You have a nice face.”

She liked being surrounded by newly clothed dolls, you, and beautiful white snow falling silently outside

Snow days weren’t too bad, in her humble opinions

Salvatore Moreau

Eh. He could feel either way about the snow, but he always likes it more when you’re around him

His home is pretty drafty, and he’s always kind of sick, so, like Donna, not a huge fan of the cold

It looks gorgeous, and it turns his home into a frozen wonderland that you have fallen on on many occasions

He loved bundling up, and the cold weather makes his aching joints feel nice

Listen, he was already going to, but if you’re the one that suggests a winter Hallmark movie,

This man loves you so much

He loves that your nose gets pink when it gets cold

He loves that you wear gloves that don’t match

He loves that he wears the scarf Donna knitted for you (that he commissioned)

“Donna will be happy to know you love her work! Should I get a matching one?”

He’s just happy when you’re around him, and he could honestly forget he’s snowed in if you spend enough time with him

He had walked into a wall of snow after trying to open a door, forgetting why he was staying inside in the fist place

You do things to this man-

Karl Heisenberg

This man is a husky

You have to haul him back inside when it gets too dark to see

He will go out frolicking in his boxers in three feet deep snow

You hate the snow because of this, because of the fact that you have to act like a parent watching their kid

“Heisenberg, you can’t fill the snowballs with nails.”

“The lycans won’t feel it, they’re dumb as shit!”

“Heisenberg!”

You like to watch his dumbass from the nice, heated factory

When he comes in, shaking like a dog, you throw a heated blanket on him and force him to make the hot chocolate

“I told you it was getting too cold to wrestle with the lycans.”

“Yeah, well they can suck my dick. It never snows this much, so I’m taking advantage of it.”

He will force you to play outside with him

You know

Like a child

Snowball fights taken too seriously, a snowman army on his roof, a little igloo village, a lycan eating a snowman,

He loves the snow, even if you don’t

He does get a little pissed off at the weather if it gives you a cold

“Not all of us are fucking huskies, Heis.”

Eh, he’ll just throw snowballs at the widow of the room you’re sleeping in

I hope you liked the headcanons, and thank you again for asking!! My inbox is always open, so keep the asks coming 😎👉👉

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simplysable · 2 years

Text

A Short Playlist Made for

Alcina Dimitrescu

Bizet’s Habenera

Elenor Rigby, The Beatles

I Hear a Symphony, Cody Fry

Claire de Lune, Charles Debussy

I Don’t Want To Set The World On Fire, The Ink Spots

Achilles Come Down, Gang of Youths

Killing Me Softly, Fugees

Blue Moon, Billie Holiday

7 rings, Ariana Grande

Dear Fellow Traveller, Sea Wolf

Paris In The Rain, Lauv

The Moon Will Sing, The Crane Wives

Fly Me To The Moon, Frank Sinatra

Dog Days Are Over, florencemachine

It’s Over, Isn’t It, Rebecca Sugar

Hello My Old Heart, The Oh Hellos

Choke, IDKHBTFM

This is my shortest playlist. Believe it or not, she’s a very difficult woman to find songs for. Anywho, I hope you like the mix, and remember that requests are open! <3

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simplysable · 2 years

Text

A Short Playlist Made for

Karl Heisenberg

The Masochism Tango, Tom Lehrer

Burning Pile, Mother Mother

Michelle, Sir Chloe

Do It All The Time, IDKHBTFM

I See Red, Everybody Loves An Outlaw

The Real Slim Shady, Eminem

Pumped Up Kicks, Foster the People

Saint Bernard, Lincoln Vlogs

Heart-Shaped Box, Nirvana

Back In Black, AC/DC

Rät, Penelope Scott

Loser, Beck

Mayday, TheFatRat

History Has It’s Eyes On You, Lin-Manuel Miranda

Hellfire, The Hunchback of Notre Dame

My Axe, Insane Clown Posse

18, Anarbor

Hayloft, Mother Mother

I hope that you like the songs I chose for the angry metal man! Alcina is next, and all I need to do is get some more songs on her playlist and we’re all good! Requests are open! <3

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simplysable · 2 years

Text

A Short Playlist Made for

Salvatore Moreau

Bubble Gum, Claire Cottrill

Take Me To Church, Hozier

Heart of Glass, Blondie

King And Lionheart, Of Monsters and Men

Lemon Boy, Cavetown

Oh Ana, Mother Mother

Ho Hey, The Lumineers

death bed, powfu

Oh, Klahoma, Jack Stauber

Love Story, Taylor Swift

Come Along, Cosmo Sheldrake

Young, Vacations

Love Like You, Rebecca Sugar

Face Time With My Mom, Bo Burnham

mean, leo

Needs, Verzache

Again, requests are open, and I hope you liked the songs I chose for fish boy!!

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simplysable · 2 years

Text

A Short Playlist Made for

Donna Beneviento

Silly Girl, chloe moriondo

Burn, Lin-Manuel Miranda

Isabella’s Lullaby, The Promised Neverland original soundtrack

The Moon Song, Beabadoobee

Mariposa, Peach Tree Rascals

It’s Been So Long, The Living Tombstone

Evelyn Evelyn, Evelyn Evelyn

Life Letters, Never Get Used To People

flowers, in love with a ghost

prom dress, mxmtoon

Willow Tree March, thepaperkitesband

Peach Pit, Peach Pit

Since I Saw Vienna, Wilbur Soot

Octopus’s Garden, The Beatles

The Record Player Song, Daisy the Great

Jolene, Dolly Parton

Madd Hatter, Melanie Martinez

Butterfly’s Repose, Zabawa

Honeybee, Steam Powered Giraffes

Remember that requests are open, and I hope that some of you will listen to the songs I chose for Donna ♥️ Sal’s playlist is on the way!!

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