#I call them Rhys tho | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

danikamariewrites · 9 months

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Oooh how about a batboys x reader fic where the reader was being a brat and Rhys was supporting her so Cass and Az restrain them before having some fun and making the other one watch?

Brat Squared (SMUT)

Poly!batboys x brat!reader

A/n: this did awoke something in me👀 help.

Since it’s midnight I’m going to bed but I wanted to gift you all this first. I’ll be back later today tho. since I have the day off I’m going to the gym and then doing some shopping 😊

Warnings: smut, foursome, dom/sub dynamics

You giggled standing back to chest against Rhys. He had one arm around your waist and the other was stroking your cheek as you both looked at Cassian and Azriel who were not in the mood.

You’d been a brat all day. You had no patience and were doing things to distract them from working. You even interrupted their end of day meeting.

And of course Rhys felt like giving in to you today. Cassian and Azriel were sick of him rewarding your bad behavior and went as far as calling him a brat as well.

“Come now. Look at her, she just wanted our attention didn’t you baby?” You bat your eyelashes at the males now towering over you. “Yeah Rhysie. I just wanted to be with you guys all day.” Cassian scoffs, “You were both bratty today. And I think our little brats need to be punished hmm?”

Azriel’s shadows slither between you and Rhys, pulling you apart. Cassian grabbed you, unceremoniously tossing you on the bed. Azriel grabbed Rhys who had a shit eating grin on his lips. The High Lord snapped his fingers and all four of you were completely bare.

As Cassian crawled over you, you felt his hardness rub against your thigh. You let out a breathy moan at the feeling, starting to grind on his thigh. Cassian brings his hand to hold your hips in a bruising grip. “No sweetheart. You wanna act like a brat you’re going to take the punishment.”

He picked you up, bringing you to his chest and flipping you so you face Azriel who has Rhys on his knees. His shadows swirling around Rhys to keep him restrained, his hard cock hitting his lower stomach as he tried to move his hips. Azriel’s hand was gripping Rhys’ short onyx hair forcing him to look at you and Cassian.

“You two had all day to play with each other and now your going to watch Azzy play with him while we have fun.” You whimper as his hot breath tickles your neck, Cassian’s words going straight to your core.

He laid you so you were propped up on your elbows, pulling your hips up so your ass was in the air. His hand came down and smacked on of your ass cheeks so hard you lurched forward. You let out a cry as he pulled his hand back to spank you again.

After ten spanks your ass was red. You could still feel. Cassian’s hand print on you and you were sure it was still going to be there tomorrow. You shifted your head so you could look up at Rhys who was just as helpless as you right now.

His cock was leaking precum as Az left marks with his mouth on Rhys’ neck and chest. You moaned at the sight above you. Mother above they were just perfect.

Cassian pulled you from your thoughts as he pulled you back to his chest. You tilted your head back to look up at him with a needy expression. “Are you ready to listen and done being a brat?” “Yes sir.” He kisses your forehead. “Good girl, baby. Now tell me what you need and maybe I’ll give it to you.”

You let out a breathy moan, “Please sir, I need you to fuck me. Need you inside me please.” Cassian and Azriel both let out dark chuckles. “Look at you using your manners. Our little brat is so polite isn’t she Az.” “She is. This one on the other hand,” he yanked Rhys’ hair harder, “needs to learn from her.”

Cassian sits, pulling you to hover just above his cock. “You’re going to ride me like a good girl while we watch Az and Rhys.” You whine as he runs the tip of his cold through your wet folds.

You go to make grabby hands at Rhys but Cassian catches your wrists, pulling them behind your back. “No baby, you can’t touch Rhysie. This is your punishment remember? Just watching, no touching.”

Cassian pulls you down on his cock, not letting you adjust to his considerable size as he helps you bounce on him. “There you go baby. Just needed one of us to fuck you huh? That why you were bratty all day?” You mumble out an uh-huh followed by a babbling of other words. You keep your eyes on Az and Rhys just like Cassian told you too.

Azriel moves to kneel behind Rhys snaking his rough hands down his toned body. He stops at the base of Rhys’ cock to leave light teasing touches. Moving his hand up he starts spreading precum around the head of Rhys’ cock. He lets out a moan, dropping his head back and thrusting his hips at Azriel’s touch.

“Please, Az.” He moans, “please touch me.” Azriel hums and begins sucking on Rhys’ pulse point. Before Rhys can begin whining Azriel wraps his hand around him and begins pumping him.

You let out a deep moan. Between Cassian’s cock hitting all the right spots and the sight before you, you were overwhelmed. You were close to your orgasm and knew if you came without permission Cassian would edge you all night.

You and Rhys made eye contact as your mouth fell open in a silent scream at the new angle Cassian moved you to. You heard Rhys start to beg Az to let him cum but couldn’t pay attention.

Keeping your eyes on them you begin to beg Cass, “Please sir, please let me cum, I need to-“ he cuts you off with a laugh. “I know your about to cum baby. I can feel it by the way your gripping my cock.” He thrust hard to prove his point. “I was t going to let you, but since you asked so nicely go ahead baby.”

Moving your hips faster you could feel your orgasm starting to build. A few more thrusts from Cassian and you came around his cock, slumping backward as he used you for his own release.

Once he finished you looked to Rhys just in time to see him release all over Azriel’s hand. The sight made your pussy wet all over again, wishing Azriel’s fingers were inside you, fucking Cassian’s cum into you.

Rhys smirked as he whispered into Azriel’s ear. His shadows let go of Rhys and he leaned back, propping himself up on his elbows.

Az and Cass switched places. Before you could comprehend what was happening Azriel was running his fingers through your folds, pushing two into your heat. You moaned at the intrusion. Az leaned over you, “Ready for round two, baby?”

tags: @nyotamalfoy @auggiesolovey @bubybubsters @baybay123455 @msiecrane @aroseinvelaris @twsssmlmaa

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lili-of-the-wildfire · 3 months

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okay fine, u all forced my hand in this one. these are MY azzie headcanons, mostly based on what’s canon in the books but i’m nothing if not a woman who would have been forcefully lobotomized so there’s also some delusion sprinkled in. enjoy 😙 (not proof read or correctly punctuated or even coherently arranged, we die like men on this blog)

* he may be a bit quiet in some situations, especially when meeting people who’s intentions he hasn’t quite figured out yet, but if he does nothing else, he’ll offer up a small smile in greeting. he’s not just going to sit there aloof in a corner, sans introduction.

* he’s a total vibe reader tho, his line of work has made sure of that. like he just knows when something is off about someone even if there is evidence saying otherwise. and he’s right every time, damn him.

* he tucks his hands behind his back out of habit, not necessarily shame. he used to be far more insecure, but as the centuries dragged on, he’s become less and less ashamed of what was done to him as a defenseless child.

* that’s not to say he’s fully healed and moved forward, just that time has given him some perspective and wisdom.

* (btw he loves hand massages with your lavender and lemon verbena lotion and he is not afraid to admit it)

* when he gets himself into trouble he tries to slink off into the shadows slowly, instead of disappearing all at once. nobody has a problem calling him out on it, but sometimes he honestly does get away with it.

* he has TASTE! he took one look at cassian and feyre’s gods awful decorating and didn’t even remove his outside clothes before he was fixing it.

* he and his mate’s house would look like something out of a Williams Sonoma holiday catalog.

* the two of you would put up lebron numbers on a joint pinterest account in a modern au.

* he’s quick as a whip with his dry humor and comebacks, and while cassian may be his main target, the two of them combined?? Mr. your mother and Mr. two hundred years at least TOGETHER? jesus it’s a wonder rhys came out of Illyria with the ego that he did.

* he differs from his brothers in that PDA is not his jam. he’s not getting blowjobs at the dining room table or fucking in tents while people die outside. he’s definitely not fingering you for the first time in a shabby inn, either. he’s more publicly reserved than that because he favors romance more.

* you know how rhys/feyre and cassian/nesta fucked before they were in any sort of relationship? azzie’s not doing that with someone he genuinely wants to pursue a relationship with.

* consider the following: does a man who’s spent centuries pining after the same woman come off as anything other than a romantic? no, lovely reader, not in the slightest.

* he’s got the softest heart, i just know it. while he’s kind, he has his reserved exterior, but i think once you get past that as a relationship develops, he’s so tender and thoughtful.

* his gift to nesta was so personal and thoughtful despite their superficial relationship, and he expected nothing in return. imagine what he could come up with for someone he knew on a more personal and intimate level!!

* his gifts may not be as over-the-top extravagant as Rhys would prefer, but they’re so well-planned and personal because he actually listens to you! and he watches you! and he takes the time to actually think about what would be useful and meaningful for you (Mor could NEVER, luv u tho baby)

* while he’s not overtly sexual, Azriel is a FLIRT! a shameless flirt! he doesn’t need to resort to poetry because when you exasperatedly tell him “stop trying to distract me, I’m busy!” he just arches a thick brow, looks you up and down and says “make me.”

* BROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

* And your cheeks heat a bit because he’s looking at you like he knows exactly what you’d taste like and he’s starving for it and then he just laughs and you realize you’re a fly that got stuck in those honey-trap eyes again

* So you huff and roll your eyes, turning to leave the room but a hand on your wrist tugs your momentum backwards and suddenly there’s another hand cupping your cheek, thumb stroking along your jawline.

* A deep hum rumbles from the back of his throat, his gaze dragging from your mouth up to your eyes, “Do that again, I like watching your eyes roll back for me.”

* ladies/theydies i am PROFUSELY sweating !!!!!!!!!

#azriel x reader #azriel #azriel fanfic #acotar

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starryhiraeth · 10 months

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Toddler Headcannons

Acotar & Tog

PT 1 here-

Acotar pregnancy Headcannons

(Btw I’m so sorry it’s been so long, I’ve been doing my exams and I’ve been so busy with them but I’m back so please feel free to request anything)

(There might be spelling errors, idk I did read through it but it’s anyones guess at this point🤷‍♀️)

Rhys-

•He might as well shout from the tallest mountain that he has a daughter

•Will bring her EVERYWHERE, even high lord meetings, she’s just sitting there ether on yours or his lap, or she’s playing with toys in front of you

•You cant tell me Rhys isn’t the parent to dress his kids in thousands worth of designer clothes that they are going to grow out of within like a month anyway

•SPOILED FUCKING ROTTEN, she is SO cheeky, most times her giggles will echo throughout the halls. She has absolutely NO FILTER, at the high lords meeting she’ll point a Beron and repeat what she heard Rhys say when talking about him “Ginger cunt” it was quite an awkward meeting after that

• He literally can’t say no to her, and she knows this, all she has to do is the puppy/baby doll eyes and she gets whatever she wants

Azriel-

•Your two daughters are polar opposites, of course they had Illyrian wings and Az’s hair but they have your eyes and Az adores it, he’s very protective over his daughters

• Thea is much more gentle than her sister, when she was younger she was scared of her shadows but now they are a comfort to her and Az taught her how to wrap them around herself like a blanket (she has gotten stuck a couple times tho)

•She usually does that blanket thing whenever she’s snuggling with Az, they are both very calm so she defo a daddies girl

•Petra is a mini psycho, not really but she is much more wild, when she was a baby she would have massive tantrums whenever she wasn’t near you, she’s a mummas girl, and was never scared of her shadows but instead used them to freak out her sister #sistertings

•Like I said, Petra was much more wild, like she would act first and think later, this stresses Az out SO MUCH because he’s scared something will happen to her but it brings him comfort when he sees her finally calm while asleep laying on you whilst your on the sofa

Cass-

•Goes flying with Jaxs almost everyday, it gives you a mini heart attack every time but you trust that he won’t drop him, Cassian would rather fly into a volcano then put your son at risk

•Jaxs is prone to having tantrums, he doesn’t mean to be stroppy, he is just very emotional and doesn’t know how to explain is and so he cries and sometimes hits

•The first time Jaxs hit you in a tantrum, he was 2, it wasn’t hard and he tried hugging your after but Cassian was pissed, he put Jaxs on the naughty step and was scared his son would just get more violent, to which you had to explains that Jaxs just had big emotions for a small child and is learning

•After that you all fell asleep in an armchair, you in Cassian’s lap and Jaxs in yours, somehow it was beautiful and chaotic, Cassian held you both closer and couldn’t remember a time when he had been so happy

•When he’s not unhappy, Jaxs is the most rambunctious, you can’t count how many times he’s come to you with a red mark on his face because he ran into a glass door, he’s a sweetie though and such a carbon copy of his father, also I can totally see Cassian wearing those baby carries that go across the front, with no shame, he’s comfortable in his masculinity

(Btw, he’s still hung up on the fact that you didn’t let him call Jaxs Cassian Jr)

Lucien-

•Lucien is very warm, idk how to explain it but I imagine him giving very homely vibes

•Kalea is the same, she likes staying close to her parents and really likes nature, so much that every Saturday you all go on walks in the country side

•There, Kalea chases butterfly’s and picks flowers, though the orange ones are always here favourite

•She doesn’t really have a favourite parent, she just finds comfort in both of you and is a little cautious meeting those she doesn’t know but when she gets to know then she is super cute

•You two are Lucien’s entire world, nothing, and I mean nothing could make him happier then playing board games in pyjamas as a family, Infront if the firelight whilst the sun sets

Eris-

•So-Berons dead!

•Anyway, he DOES make tiny thrones next to yours and his for your sons, Idris is the older one but Maël is the one who acts older, Idris is the one accidentally setting trees on fire whilst Maël judges from a distance

• Maël will usually be found in your lap, playing with whatever necklace you have on and trying to relax when suddenly Idris, with the tips of his hair on fire comes running through the hallways yelling like a madman and 2 seconds later Eris is running after him

•After that Maël will probably mutter something like “They crazy mama” to which you just nodded

•Eris will make some serious changes to the decor in your house, whilst growing up all Eris remembers is the lifeless dark hallways so he changes that immediately, he is determined to be better than his father and give his children a happy childhood

Helion-

•Yuna is the probably one of the most spoiled children ever! And I mean like- if it were a modern AU her room would be worth like 30Mil by the age of 5

•Her favourite colour is gold and she is absolutely covered in it! Gold clothes, gold jewellery, gold glitter, gold everything!

•speaking of gold glitter, it’s everywhere! And if you think for one second that Helion is embarrassed to be covered in gold glitter then I’ll just let you know that he is the one who keeps buying it for her, He wears the glitter and wears it proud!

•Your lives are luxuriant! Just imagine, in a row, Helion, you, Yuna, all in massage chairs with cucumbers on your eyes and face masks in silk robes detailed with golden flakes…you lucky bitch

•Yuna will sit on her fathers throne ALL THE TIME, she’ll be high lady one day and she knows it, actually there were many times where you sat on Helion lap on your throne and Yuna had a mischievous smile on her face as she sat on her fathers throne all by herself

Dagdan-

•Okay so- Rune and Zara kind of hate each other, they are always arguing and I don’t mean normal sibling arguments, it actually worries you and since Dagdan thinks that twins are important and doesn’t like them fighting, he’ll sit them in a room and tie there hands together when they argue. Think:

•and as much as you feel bad for your babies it kinda funny

•the only time the twins get along is when they are making CHAOS

•Setting the throne on fire ✅

Trying to jump into the cauldron ✅

Stealing their great uncles crown and throwing in a nearby river ✅✅✅

•You and Dagdan love them but sometimes you’ll put them in Brannagh’s room and just take off, for her to look after them for a couple days 😂

Tamlin-

•soooo- there was a joke on my last post in the comments about Tamlins kid being born with dark hair and purple eyes and as funny as I thought that was, I’ll continue will my original plan😂

•Tamlin originally thought he would want a son but when your daughter arrived he couldn’t have ask for anything more or different, he loves her more than life and have every plant based nickname for her “Petal” “rose” “Lily flower” and the list goes on

•Persephone is the sweetest child that ever was, she had Tamlins hair and your eyes and lots and lots of freckles, she also has dimples ☺️

•She is know an as the “The realms Joy” throughout spring court and the people love the little princess though Tamlin sometimes worries that the harshness of become a ruler will kill her happiness, you assure him that she’ll have people by her side to help her

•She does this really cute thing where she’ll go up to someone, usually you or her father and ask what your favourite flower is, it doesn’t matter if you’ve already told her, she’s little okay? She forgets these things!, anyway she’ll ask your favourite flower and after you say it she’ll nod her head and march out of the room only to return 25 minutes later with basket full of the flower that you named and maybe a couple weeds she’s just so happy she could give them to you and Tamlin will have them put in a vase every time, weeds and all

Im so sorry this took like a century to write 😂

Anyway, exams are over so I can write so much more now and I’m open to requests

I’m honestly kind of surprised how much I wrote for Tamlin, but I guess it’s Tamlin fans lucky day, your welcome 😉

Anyway ummm

Bai?❤️

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sunnybyler · 28 days

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i’ve been sitting on my thoughts for so long but i just have to get this off my chest. i don’t like to yuck ppls yum so if you like e/riel pls scroll away nd keep having your fun it’s not my problem. however some of y’all can get mean as HELL and as an elucien i have to get this off my chest. (also warning for gwynriels i’m with y’all i defend y’all here however i do go in a bit on az in this so fair warning). i truly have no idea why e/riels cling so hard to the azriel bonus chapter in acosf because that chapter, more than literally anything else in the series, proved to me that e/riel is absolutely NOT going to be endgame. let me explain:

1. it is explicitly stated that azriel did not think of his relationship with elain outside of a sexual nature. i think some ppl get kinda annoyingly puritanical when trying to make this point when it’s like 100% certain lucien had sexual thoughts of elain too. the point isn’t the thoughts themselves. the difference here is the explicit mention that he didn’t consider anything with her outside of that.

2. the point above ^ is further exacerbated by the fact that az did not give a flying fuck if he killed elain’s MATE. even if elain hasn’t accepted the bond, it would still be extremely painful for her based on what we’ve seen with rhys, feyre, and even rhys’s parents (who weren’t good for each other, yet we saw how rhys’s dad lost it when she died). now of course us lucien lovers know damn well he would never in a million years call a blood duel to try to claim elain (and fuck u rhys for saying that, i usually have your back but come ON you are not the only male who can respect their mate’s autonomy). but az doesn’t know that!? in fact seems to agree with rhys that he could. ppl argue on who would win that fight — my opinion hinges 100% on if powers are fully unleashed but that’s not the point at all. no matter WHO wins, elain is going to feel responsible for someone’s death. of course it wouldn’t be her fault if men decided to be fucking stupid, but with the little we know about elain shows that she would feel so guilty if that happened. but azriel doesn’t seem to give af that anyone fighting to the death over her is the last thing she would ever want. not only did az not think of elain outside his fantasies and therefore not fully care for her, but he doesn’t seem to even KNOW elain in this chapter. now, i could go in on this in acosf as a whole. but i’m keeping it to this chapter alone.

3. and further on THAT point, az doesn’t really give any reasoning on his interest in elain outside of this insane “three brothers/three sisters” thing he fully pulled out of his ass. tbh i almost thing this is sjm’s way of addressing the fan theories on that. now i get it to some extent from az’s pov — seeing his brothers happy with these sisters must fuck with your head after you’d all been bachelors together for 500 years. especially considering how he’s felt unworthy of love his whole life and this seems to support that insecurity of his. i get that it makes him feel ostracized from them, and that he’s now an outlier not being with an archeron. i get that. i do. i sympathize with him here. however that does not change the fact that he isn’t speaking of elain like she’s her own individual here — hell he fully calls her “the other”. i think part of this conversation was him being frazzled, i give him a bit more grace than some do (tho he pissed me off BAD in this scene), but we were fully in this man’s head. did he give us a full reason why he liked elain besides his brother’s mates and his sexual thoughts?? they would’ve at least crossed his mind when rhys was grilling them if sjm was trying to set up her next romance here. as it is, we have literally nothing to imply azriel actually likes elain herself and not the idea of being closer with his brothers.

4. az has kinda a habit of ignoring the reality of the women he’s attracted to in some way. he has his own version of them in his head that he puts on a pedestal. now i could do a whole psych eval on this man and how he thinks he’s unworthy of love and therefore only allows himself to have feelings for women he knows/thinks he can’t have. but to focus on this chapter alone, my points above ^ about how he doesn’t really think of elain outside his fantasies/bringing him closer to his brothers and not really understanding her pretty much wraps it up there. i mean he even talks about how he thinks his scarred hands don’t belong on her because she’s so perfect in his eyes. that’s not love, that’s obsession and it’s unhealthy. he clearly thinks himself below elain and ignores that she has her own flaws too.

5. aaaand i saved the biggest for (almost) last….. GWYN. this is a genuine GENUINE question. why in the fucking hell. would sjm make half the chapter focusing on az & gwyn if she was teasing e/riel. like that makes no sense. not to be annoying and mention chekhov's gun but that idea applies to relationships too. i’m sorry but she couldn’t be more explicit about her future romances. you could argue “oh well it’s because there’s gonna be a love triangle”. y’all. elain has. elain has a mate. there already IS a love triangle. there was absolutely no reason for her to bring gwyn into this chapter other than her preparing us for a future relationship, literally none. especially with all the romantic subtext (hell not even subtext, just TEXT). gwyn getting him to talk about himself so easily when he’s so quiet usually, him taking the idea of making her happy and he “buried the image down deep, where it GLOWED QUIETLY” (which SCREAMS mating bond to me but even if it’s not it’s clearly something he cherishes deeply), the SHADOWSINGERS SHADOWS SANG FOR HER!?

6. the fucking necklace regifting. oh it’s bad. OHHH ITS BAD. when the girls realize it’s gonna be SO messy but im hoping sjm doesn’t go the stupid cat fight route bc neither of them did anything wrong. az did. i’m sorry i’m dunking on him so much in this post i rlly don’t hate him i just think he needs like decades of therapy (which tbf don’t we all) which i unfortunately don’t think sjm is going to give him before giving him his romance. but even the biggest azriel lovers have to admit that this was insanity. a few points on it here. first, if it’s so easily regiftable then it couldn’t have been that well thought out in regards to elain. say what you will about lucien’s gifts, even argue that he gave her jewelry too. but elain was actually shown wearing pearls. az’s gift seemed shallow to me — it was something pretty, and elain’s pretty, and it had a flower, and elain gardens. it’s clear lucien put SO much more thought into his gifts, whether he succeeded or not (which i need to remind y’all — we still don’t know. maybe she liked the gifts maybe she didn’t, but regardless she acted the way she did bc of her feelings about the bond, not the gift). and azriel has spent so much more time with elain than lucien has. if that necklace really felt like elain to him, he could’ve kept it or returned it. but nope. buddy gave it to a whole other girl bc he could easily associate it with someone else. he clearly felt some special pull towards gwyn too, going out of his way to give it to her. he had ONE meaningful conversation with her. i already discussed the quote earlier that makes me think mating bond personally. but no matter what, him giving her the same gift he gave someone he was pursuing romantically is a clear sign of what’s to come (and probably a setup for some sort of drama that i don’t think im mentally ready for).

so there we have it! why i think that the bonus chapter thoroughly proves that e/riel is not going to be endgame. i honestly think it’s possible they might be a thing for a minute (tho i could also see this being the closing of that chapter), but i don’t think it’s going to last. sjm just gave us too many blatant hints that elain and az would NOT work together long term, and that azriel in particular is more suited for someone else. i might’ve missed some points bc there is SO much that goes down in this tiny chapter so lmk if there’s other stuff you picked up on!

#elucien #gwynriel #acotar #acosf #acosf bonus chapter #elain archeron #pro elucien #pro gwynriel #gwyneth berdara #azriel #anti e/riel #lucien vanserra #elain x lucien #gwyn x azriel

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loonylooly · 8 months

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at this point i'm wondering what sarah is thinking when writing her love interests, like ok it's clear she finds them hot but like....are they good people

Rhys:

UTM lap dance shenanigans

throwing Feyre into danger constantly (Weaver, destroying cauldron, getting the book from Adriata, etc etc)

Still not doing jack shit about wing clippings in Illyria?? Emerie is right there, Rhysand, go enforce your damn laws

Insulting his wife's sister constantly

Almost killed his wife's sister cause she dared give her important medical information

Locked Lucien (MY BOY!!) in the house of wind

Locked Nesta in the house of wind

Didn't give Mor any warning that time he made her face her abusers and she cried i think (ngl i forgot most of it)

Ignoring Hewn City even tho...Kier is like the only bad guy we've seen from there?? Surely there's decent people in Hewn City, don't gotta make everyone suffer

Nesta windhaven kidnapping intervention so she stops spending Rhys' money (if it was really about her own sake, they would've put a stop to it much earlier)

Seemingly alienates everyone in Feyre's life that could and would stand up to Rhys for Feyre's sake. Lucien? Nah, shoo. Nesta? Nah, shoo. Weird thought but Tarquin? Yeah, makes her steal his book.

And last but DEFINITELY not least; demon baby wife death

HE COULD'VE TOLD FEYRE... OR ATLEAST NOT THREATENED TO KILL HER SISTER FOR TELLING HER WHEN HE HOULD'VE TOLD HER IN THE FIRST PLACE??

THERE'S PROBABLY MORE BUT MOVING ON

Cassian:

Barely ever stands up for Nesta in the IC

Aids in kidnapping Nesta to Windhaven so she stops spending whysand's money

Laughs at Nesta when she falls down the stairs

Aids in punishing Nesta for daring to tell Feyre important medical info

Constantly going agaisnt Nesta's wishes and trying to "save her" when she doesn't want him to

That one time Azriel asked Nesta if Cass had pushed her down the stairs...Like are we gonna ignore that?? Personally I'd have a quarter life crisis if my closest friend, who is like my sibling and has known me most of our lives, seriously entertained the idea that i would physically assault the girl I like

general aggressiveness all of ACOSF

aids in bulldozing Nesta's apartment

Rowan goddamn Whitehorn (Who I've yet to see people bashing him somehow,,, HoF rowan was like if ACOSF cassian had a horrific murder baby

Left his pregnant mate alone during a war cause he wanted to prove himself....like..idk man if i had the choice between war and taking care of my pregnant wife i'd pick the wife (did he know she was pregnant? i've kind of forgotten by now)

Rowan's kid would've been hundreds of years older than Aelin.....just think abt that

Literally everything he did to Aelin during training in HoF

Their argument where he PUNCHED HER IN THE FACE

Threatened to whip Aelin...I repeat....Threatened to whip Aelin, an ex-slave....

Told Aelin it'd be better if she died 10 years ago (unprovoked?? bitch you met her like 2 weeks ago just cause she's getting on your nerves doesn't mean you gotta wish DEATH upon her)

Literally was relieved to find out she was only 19 because if she was a few years older she could've been THE CHILD OF HIS BEST FRIEND.

No issue with marrying the cousin of his best friend's child....Imagine if he hadn't met Aelin first.. If he'd met Aedion first, Aelin would've always been the relative of his friend's son to him

FOR THE RECORD i hate all of the SJM age gaps but rowan and aelin's specifically irks me because Aelin LITERALLY CALLS HIM OLD throughout the WHOLE SERIES

Literally tells Aelin he doesn't care about what she's been through and that she is nothing to him after she confronts him for leaving her

Puts Luca in danger by sticking him on to a frozen lake with a monster inside where he'll DIE if Aelin can't save him

Funnily enough, some of the only seemingly decent person guys in SJM 1. Are completely forgotten about in the books or 2. SJM had to make them violently unlikeable

Like we've got:

Tarquin, seemed like a pretty good guy, rightfully pissed that the IC stole his family heirloom, shows up like twice in the books (LET HIM COME BACK SARAH I LOVE HIM)

Tamlin, was pretty decent in book 1, was made violently unlikeable in book 2 onwards

Chaol, very strong morals, generally a good person, loves his wife, made violently unlikeable and boring in late CoM, HoF, and QoS (ToD is one of my favorite books in the series, will praise ToD till the day I die, my boy EARNED his own book)

Aedion, seemed like a good person, strong morals, spent years trading his dignity for the sake of Terrasen, loved his cousin above all else, made violently unlikable in KoA (even tho I think he was justified in being angry about it, i'd be SO pissed)

Sartaq, good guy, strong morals, Nesryn's chapters were some of my favorites in ToD, Sartaq is one of my favorite SJM love interests, i'll never forgive author lady for forgetting about him in KoA (tho i guess she forgot about everyone from ToD? Yrene and Chaol are the only important ones, she barely even mentions Nesryn even though Nesryn's BEEN an integral part of the gang since QoS, giving her the Suki from ATLA treatment)

#acotar #sjm #sarah j maas #throne of glass #tog #anti rhysand #anti rowan #anti cassian #anti nessian #anti feysand #chaol westfall #sartaq #tarquin #tamlin #aedion ashryver #nesta deserves better

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nikethestatue · 3 months

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so confused how people see Az as an entitled fuckboi but still ship him with their beloved Gwyn when:

1. This man pined over Mor for 500 YEARS. Not days, hours - YEARS. He is 540 and pined over Mor for 500 of those??? Insane.

2. The reason he moved on from Mor was Elain - this is not debatable, that is canon text. Cassian (you know, lord of bloodshed, the MOST reliable narrator, Velaris fashion police) even notes Az has moved on. Nesta knows WHY Az has moved on. Az clearly shows he is at the very least, attracted to elain (obsessed, head over wings, but potato potahto I guess)

3. This man was tortured by his family. He does not have good self esteem. He already thinks his position as spymaster/lead torturer is bad, he is ashamed of his own hands and struggles with feeling worthy on a GOOD DAY. He knows it’s wrong to have feelings for Elain (bc she has a mate and he was ordered to stay away from her) but HE STILL HAS them. He can’t help it, he loves her?? Is that not the most heart wrenching thing youve heard?? How is he entitled when man himself doesn’t feel worthy of even touching her NECK???

Like how can you read that bonus chapter and say “yeah Az is an incel he is a fuckboi only lusting after elain” like this dude is clearly torturing himself with the feelings he has for her ?? How is he only after sex?? Do we want to whip out Cassian & Rhys’s POVs about their mates? The same thoughts.

It boggles my mind, truly, to attempt to understand gwynriel. elucien - I don’t ship but I do understand. They have been declared mates…that’s about all they have but at least that is there.

How can they be out here saying Az is evil incel fuckboi but then ship him with Gwyn… a priestess that was SA-ed and going on her own healing journey?? It makes no sense.

“Oh but elain needs light and azriel is just darkness she won’t be able to understand him” idk seems like it’s been said multiple times they understand each other without a single word.

“Elain can’t handle his darkness, Gwyn will heal him” … heal him how exactly? Through her laughter and song and pliable bones? Like she is not a therapist. She is bad with secrets (canonically). She can’t even leave the library. So what makes HER capable of handling “azriels darkness” like ?? What is she going to do someone please genuinely tell me? I would ask a gwynriel but they will get angry and tell me I’m a monster against SA victims or some bs.

Also what the actual hell is this so called “azriel’s darkness”?? Why we doing this “I can fix him” mentality in 2024? Sure man has got self image insecurity issues but it’s something HE has to fix … himself…

All I ever see from gwynriels is the craziest shit they are trying to pass off as theory because they literally hate elain!!? They ship elucien… only so it gets elain away from NC

They send her to spring court to be with tamlin and the flowers. They send her to day court to be with sunlight(? Even tho the night court has… sun…?)

They say she will turn evil. They say it’s only lust between them. They say she looks bad in black (this girl is described as having beauty to bring kings to their knees… I don’t think people care that she allegedly cannot pull off black)

They hate elain because elain is beautiful and kind and sweet and NOT a warrior and they don’t connect with her. And the loooooove azriel bc honestly a man who doesn’t say anything is just easier to shape to someone’s own fantasies. And they looove Gwyn because she is pretty enough (not devastating beauty) and vague enough that they can self insert.

And elain is also still a character in development. But the few things we know about her were apparently dammning enough that they have written her off completely.

But the fact is she’s the only character relevant enough and has shown an interest in azriel that is reciprocated. So why are we even fighting still? It’s been over since SJM wrote “death and the lovely fawn” even after she made her mated to Lucien.

He is only an incel fuckboi when it comes to Elain though. It's never with anyone else. With Gwyn he is a gallant hero.

Yeah, I never understood what qualifications Gwyn possesses to 'heal Azriel's trauma' especially considering her extremely, EXTREMELY limited life experience. She is 28, acting like she is 13, because she's lived in a closed environment all her life, had her basic chores, but everything was taken care of for her. Then she moved to the Library, where she is in the same situation. Not denying *her* trauma, but she barely dealt with it herself, and until Nesta, didn't do a very good job at it either. She only just began functioning, though still unable to join society and doesn't want to leave the Library. Even to go to a wedding! And this is the person they think is going to 'heal' Azriel's darkness? Can 500 year old 'darkness' even be healed? I feel like Azriel is what he is and I don't think there is much 'healing' that's going to happen. He is essentially Lorcan--he'd thaw for his girl, he'll be friends with Cassian and Nesta, and that's pretty much it. And the girl who'll accept him, who already accepted him is Elain.

Also, GA girlies need to remember that it's not a woman's job to 'fix' a guy and his 'darkness'. It's Azriel's responsibility, if he so desires.

Will never hear an Elriel talking about Elain 'healing Azriel's darkness'. Homeboy better take care of that himself because there is Dusk Court shit to take care of.

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miyaniacs · 3 months

Text

Corrupted by Darkness

- Chapter 7 -

Chapter 6 ; Wattpad ; AO3

A/N: Hey.. sorry for not updating... Uni got in the way ... I hope you like the chapter tho :) And thank you all so much for reading and the feedback <3

"She bonded you way before I did."

The words keep on repeating in my head.

Sanguis bonded me... A big white dragon with dead black eyes. Noctis wasn't even surprised I knew how she looked like. He knew I saw her in my head... that I saw her in my head on the worst day of my life.

It was dark outside as I looked through the widow in my room. Something seemed off, it was way too quiet, no animal was seen outside and when I somehow managed to saw one, it looked like it was running away from something. Resting my head on the window, I scratch the cat on my lap and close my eyes. Just when I'm about to fall asleep, my cat gets up and hisses at something outside of my window. "Huh? What's there?" I ask her and press my face against the window trying to figure out what she's hissing at.

Suddenly two dark eyes appear right in front of my face.

My cat screams and tries to attack whatever there is.

Then I feel it.

Every cell in my body starts to burn and something's pushing... against me from within.

"No!" I scream out as I fight against it, throwing everything my soul has to offer against the intruder. I scream and scream and scream, but the burning sensation is too much.

From somewhere I hear my parents voice and I feel their hands on my body. I try to answer, tell them to go away and leave me alone, but I can't form words, I just keep on screaming.

Tears run down my face as I feel my parents hugging me, shaking me, screaming at each other in panic. I need to warn them. Need to tell them to run, run from what I'm loosing control over. It's pushing against me, trying to take control over my body, I feel it's power, it's soul, it's thought and everything screams death.

"I'm sorry." I whisper as my mind goes black and I it taking control over my body. The last thing I see are the faces of my parents crying red tears.

"Hey little one... hey... heyyy... you're awake." A soft deep voice echos in my head. As I open my eyes I stare at the night sky ... within someone's eyes.

"What...who are you? Where are my parents?" I panic and look around. I'm in an unfamiliar room, its rather small yet cozy, the windows allow a look at a beautiful small garden, the sun is out and shines in the room, showing small particles in the air.

"You're save here. I'm Rhysand and you're in my home in Velaris."

I open my eyes and close my mouth. I really need to stop screaming in my sleep.

"Nea? Are you alright?" Liam calls out from the other side of the wall.

"Yes." I yell back.

"Are you sure?"

"Yes Liam, go back to sleep."

Rolling my eyes I get up in my bed, put on my small light. The light illuminates my the skin on my wirkst, making the small mark on the inside glow. A smile spreads across my face as my fingers trace the form of the small dragon. Taking a deep breath I get up and start searching for my coat.

The wind blows around me and I pull my coat closer to my shivering body. As if being in a trance something inside of me pulls me towards the flying field. I need to see him, I need to feel save, need to put off the mask I wore for way too long.

Taking a few more steps I stop.

"Noctis." I whisper and his glowing eyes appear in the dark of the night.

"Let go of her." His deep voice echos through my body.

"No." I reply and smile.

"Why her?" He asks.

"Don't know... she looked happy."

"And you needed to destroy that?"

"No I wanted it... but she didn't want me..." I sigh and fake pout.

"That's why you killed them?" He snarls.

"Yup." An evil smile spreads across my face, "That little bitch closed me off, hid me in the darkest parts of her soul. But I manage to sneak out. Not often but I did... "

"You sneaked out on that night with Rhys."

"Yes. I was bored, her life was too boring, I needed to spice things up."

"Spice things up?!" Noctis hisses.

"Yeah. She was about to discover her bond with Azriel ... and since his already snapped..." I shrug.

"It's been years... you're strong enough now to materialize your own body now." Noctis breathing gets heavier and heavier, he tries his best to control himself but its too late. The anger inside of him is too much. The flames shoot out of him. Light blue flames cover the body of his rider and a sinister voice laughs inside to them.

"Feeling better now my love?" Sanguis smiles and looks up at Noctis.

#acotar fanfiction #acotar headcanon #acotar x reader #xaden riorson #xaden x reader #azriel x reader #azriel x oc #fourth wing #acotar oc #azriel fanfic #fourth wing fanfic #fourth wing x reader

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nyxreads · 1 year

Text

"I am a Shadowsinger — it's not a title that someone just made up."

Is it romantic tho? Calling Azriel a "Shadowsinger", is it special?

Everyone who called him by his title (I'm gonna exclude all the times Feyre called Azriel "shadowsinger")

ACOMAF:

King of Hybern:

Ch 65:

He smiled at me. “If any of you interfere, the shadowsinger dies. Pity about the other brute’s wings.”

ACOWAR:

Eris

Ch 26:

Eris looked me over. The crown and dress. “You didn’t think that I knew your shadowsinger would come sniffing around to see if I’d told my father about your … powers?

Jurian

Ch 53:

“Then find them,” Jurian said. He jerked his chin to Azriel. “Send the shadowsinger, send whomever you trust, but find them.”

Ch 54:

Alone, Jurian said, “Tell the shadowsinger I’m sorry about the arrow to the chest.”

Ch 65:

Jurian’s grin was a slash of white in the gloom. “If you hear screaming, don’t panic.” His diversion. He smirked toward the shadows. “I hope you can carry three, shadowsinger.”

Rhysand

Ch 64:

“You get them in and out again, shadowsinger,” Rhys said to Azriel as I walked to the spymaster’s side,

ACOFAS

Amren

Ch 19:

“Thank you, Shadowsinger,” she said, inclining her head.

ACOSF

Ch 7:

Jurian:

“Send that shadowsinger of yours to track Briallyn,” Jurian ordered, his face grave.

Cassian:

Cassian ignored the barb. “Yes. What you know, I want to know. I will notify you of any movement on my father’s part regarding Briallyn. So send out your shadowsinger. And when he returns, find me.”

Ch 8:

Nesta:

She set down her teacup. “Is that a threat, Shadowsinger?”

Ch 14:

Eris:

Eris kept his eyes on Rhys. “I assume your shadowsinger is off doing what he does best.”

“I can delay my father from allying with Briallyn and starting this war for a little while. But not forever. A few months, perhaps. So I’d suggest your shadowsinger hurry.."

Ch 60:

Gwyn:

Gwyn threw Azriel a withering stare as she strode past him. “See you tomorrow, Shadowsinger,” she tossed over a shoulder.

Let's see how many people called his hand beautiful — Oh! Wait, only one: ELAIN

ACOWAR Ch 24: I couldn’t tell if she was looking at his blue Siphon or at his scarred skin beneath as she breathed, “Beautiful.” Color bloomed high on Azriel’s golden-brown cheeks,

credits to: @merymoonbeam and my Elriel friends lol <3

#pro elriel #elriel #azriel shadowsinger

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acourtofthought · 6 months

Note

Can't wait for Elucien's book (I hope it's next!!!), but I'm also preparing myself for a whole lot of "but e/riel was planned, she retconned it blah blah blah". I basically block any E/riels I come across because I'm just not interested in them or their ship, but I still see some crap from time to time (the art is pretty tho).

Like they really think Sarah will write not one, but TWO books (Elucien + Gwynriel) instead of writing ONE book she supposedly really wants to write (E/riel). Like Eluciens and Gwynriels broke into her house and are holding her hostage until she writes the books lmao

I agree, the art is beautiful and their vision of Elain is typically lovely.

But yeah, I know we can all predict their backlash if Elucien ends up as endgame (PLEASE let them be next, it's been so long coming for them and especially Lucien - end his suffering! 😭).

I don't know how anyone can claim she retconned E/riel if that happens considering Elain and Lucien were made mates in book 2. MATES. There is nothing so special as a well matched mating bond so how can two mates ending up together be a retcon?

For every E/riel relationship "hint" that popped up, SJM also provided us the mallet to knock that hint back into it's hole (sort of like a game of Whack-a-Mole.

Elain wears cobalt when she first meets Az? Cobalt is revealed to also be Graysens color.

Azriel took Elain out to the garden? Only after Lucien first suggested it and Feyre called down her orders to Rhys through the bond.

Azriel offered to take Elain to see how her seeds here coming in? Only after Feyre first offered to take her.

Feyre questions why Elain and Az aren't mates but then never speaks of Elain and Az as a thing again. And yes, Rhys says sometimes the bond picks poorly but why did the bond pick poorly for his parents? Because his father was cold and vicious while his mother was soft and fiery. Between Lucien and Az, who is more cold and vicious? Neither is a bad guy like Rhys's father of course but really, people are LYING to themselves in they aren't willing to admit Az is a lot more like Rhys's father than Lucien. And that means he would not be right for Elain who is soft and fiery like Rhys's mother.

Azriel figured out Elain was a Seer? Only because Feyre begged him for help and he winnowed away after her plea to search for answers. Not to mention Feyre knew that Elain foresaw the ravens coming before Az did, she just didn't know that made her a Seer. And Cassian was not the one to discover Nesta's true powers so clearly it's not a romantically coded thing.

Azriel lent Elain TT? Only after Cassian offered her a dagger then Mor begged him to sit out of battle. Had the female he loved not cried to him to stay safe, Az would not have had TT to offer Elain in the first place. And Elain only took it after Feyre's reassurance she wouldn't need it (not when Az first gave it to her). Also, SJM very pointedly told us that Elain returned it to him and "did not look back". It doesn't matter what Az offered because in the end, Elain did not want it.

Azriel might have gotten her a Solstice gift the second year but he was relieved not to have to get her one the first and looked at Mor with yearning while Elain was sitting right in the room with them 😬 What a disturbing romance right? Az drooling over Mor while the apparent "love of his life" is beside him?

And yes, Elain and Az nearly kissed but since when has that ever mattered in an endgame pairing? Feyre and Tamlin did way more. So did Nesta outside of Cassian.

Az also then told Elain she was a mistake and ended up feeling happier an hour later after spending time with another female.

So where exactly would SJM be retconning E/riel when for every positive interaction there is an equally negative one (when it comes to their ship)?

For every example of buildup she turned around and knocked them right back down to the ground.

#anti e/riel

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blacktreacle22 · 24 days

Text

Elriel design choices?!

!!!!! Spoilers for ACOMAF, ACOWAR and ACOSF

Just some thoughts that may have been voiced already somewhere on here (or on tiktok, or instagram, or reddit (where i have also posted this….):

Just a small context: I am new (NEW) to the fandom (finished the series a couple of days ago, read them in about 2 weeks, now I am listening to them bc I am feral- next stop: ToG and CC!!)

So, when listening I either find myself rewind to listen to specific wording OR find myself wanting to do something else with my phone or just my hands or anything (like a sudoku or something).

Literally a couple of minutes ago, I was like “hmm what do I do, do I just sit in bed and listen? I don’t want to fall asleep and not know where I left the audio off” so I just stared at the picture of the book cover for ACOWAR (I read them on kindle) and as I was staring (really looking this time) i thought: “Is that Truth Teller? I mean, silly me, of course it is, it is the weapon that killed the King of Hybern, the big bad of the trilogy, duh!”

But then, on closer inspection I noticed something in the lower left corner that very much resembles a rose, imo. We already know what the rose is a symbol for, so I will spare you the Elain imbibed with spring-like qualities description. After that, I looked at the intertwined shapes of smoke, mist, tendrils, whatever you wish to call them and realized the one forming the rose is particularly lighter and the ones in the back are particularly darker- just like, you guessed it, shadows and light.

“Oh well, it could just mean that the Shadow D*ddy offered the really important weapon to the person that killed the king, not that big of a deal” (again, I will spare you the she’s-the-only-one-he-has-ever-entrusted-the-weapon-to discourse).

Or, dare I say, it was a really conscious design choice?

(REALLY IMPORTANT MENTION: when i started voicing this post in my head, the ACOTAR cover in my memory, had Tamlin’s beast on it, which I realized is actually Andras but I still made it work, I think)

I thought:

“hmm, interesting that you should have Andras on the first cover, serving as the event that triggered the whole story AND a testament to Tamlin’s power (shapeshifting- dual nature);

“interesting that you should have Rhys’ beast form on the second cover, him being the main love interest (on the book that the mating bond snapped in place and changed the story further) AND a testament to his dual nature (especially him being half-Illryan);

“interesting that you should have a dual symbolism (light and shadows, Az and Elain) both of them having a second nature of sorts, on the third cover, them being the people that basically made the story end;

So, not only are we keeping in line with the “dual nature symbolism” (which will most likely play a big part in Elaine’s book- with her being a seer) but we are also adding a duo on the center stage;

Not only are we referring to pivotal people/moments in the story, but we are putting them together in the spotlight;

If we are also to consider the fact that, in ACOTAR, we are hinted at Feysand (it is true, it happened, it is on page) in ACOMAF at Nessian (happened), I wonder what could possibly be hinted at in the third? Specifically now, that I have seen this book cover more clearly.

++++ the cover of ACOFAS is a flower, which again, great symbolism for… you guessed it, ELAINE. I do agree that it can also suggest spring, but what I think is even more important is that in spring, things are REBORN. So rebirth, a new beginning, a new story to tell, a new cycle of books.

And if you think about it, there is a new story to tell for each sister (even tho we had Feysand for the trilogy, they will still be there, and with Nyx that is a new beginning).

We have ACOSF, with friendship, love and healing.

And we have whatever is in store for us with Elaine’s book (bc I am so tired of bashing on her as a character, like it is going to CLEARLY be her book).

PS: I know it is not necessarily a good worded theory but this is my first ever post on reddit and it is currently 3 in the morning so I do hope I made sense for some people at least 🙏🥲

PPS: I am a hardcore Elriel shipper, THO, if everyone is happy and it is well written, I could eventually (months later, warm up to other ships- I am only here to read and appreciate amazing posts so please no ill-thoughts)❤️

#elriel #acotar #pro elriel #elain archeron #elain x azriel #pro elain #elain acotar #azriel #shipping #azriel shadowsinger #love #sjmaas #sjm books #sjm universe #acotar 6 #having faith #this fandom is kinda scary #elriel shipper staying strong because I have a tendency to spoil myself #acotar spoilers

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divinemare · 8 months

Text

Legend of a Mortal Love

┊ ➶ rhys x oc

┊ ➶ part five

part four

‧͙⁺˚*･༓☾

Velaris was like nothing she had ever seen in her life. Not that she had seen much, tho. But still.

Ariadne spent hours a day walking through the city, accompanying Rhiannon and Mor going shopping for the incoming Winter Solstice. And they had even asked her her opinion sometimes.

“What do you think about this?” Rhiannon asked, taking a mug that read ‘as hot as my ass’.

She tried hard to keep a straight face, and even tho the mug seemed to be the most ridiculous gift ever, Ariadne nodded anyway.

“It looks like something that…uhm, it’s ok, it’s funny,” she managed to stop herself before she got to say what was truly on her mind, but Rhiannon noticed it immediately, since she did that almost all the time.

“Something like what?” The female raised a dark eyebrow, and Ariadne knew there was no escaping that look.

“Like something…I don’t know, I may be wrong,” Ariadne brushed the subject off, but Rhiannon did not.

“Ariadne, you can tell me anything, you know? We’re far from court now,” Rhiannon told her that at least twice a day.

But still, she was a court princess, and Ariadne was…

She let out a sigh and looked into the beautiful violet eyes. Rhiannon always encouraged her to speak her mind, to say whatever she wanted to say, like also Morrigan had been doing since they got to Velaris. It was still hard for her, to “speak her mind”, every time she had tried to in the past, it had ended up in beatings and nasty bruises, and everyone she had ever witnessed speaking too much their mind, always ended up dead.

“I think…it might be something Cassian would like,” she finally said it, realizing how stupid it had been to keep it quiet.

Rhiannon smiled, like she too had been thinking the same thing.

“You’ve been paying attention, huh?”

Ariadne’s cheeks caught a little bit of color, but she nodded anyway. “I like to observe, it’s everything you can do while working in court. No speaking, no distractions, just work. Silence does have its advantages, tho, one learns to listen, to keep quiet and observe.”

And quiet was exactly how Rhiannon had fell when Ariadne spoke. She recognized that expression in the female’s face, Rhiannon tended to make it every time something about Ariadne’s…life situation, got mention, and it made her feel bad that she had been the one to brought the subject up.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to upset you.”

“No! No, you don’t have to apologize for anything, Ariadne, I should be the one apologizing,” the female left the mug on the counter and sighed, grabbing Ariadne’s hands.

Mor had somehow managed to get rid of the chains. Both on her wrists and on her ankles, and every step she gave, every movement she made, felt weird, but somehow…good.

Ariadne had never been without her chains, not even as a child, only for the moment she went to bed an even then, there were chains in her ankles. Not having them on her felt as if not having a part of her, as weird as it sounded, but she was getting used to the feeling of her skin being free of the metal. Skin that was, for the first time in her entire life, healing.

She was getting dangerously used to not having them, that was.

“And why would you do that?”

“Because…you know,” for the first time since they had met, Rhiannon seemed to not be able to meet her stare. “This,” she rubbed a delicate, manicured hand over the bruises and scarred skin of her wrists, then finally looked up into her eyes with heaviness in her own. “And everything else.”

“Rhiannon…”

“Rhi, please call me Rhi,” the request sounded like a plea, and Ariadne’s throat bobbed trying hard not to let the knot in it win.

“Rhi…” the nickname felt too personal rolling off her tongue, too intimate, like they were…friends. “This isn’t your fault, you don’t make the rules.”

“I know, but-”

“Let’s go look for Morrigan, shall we?” Ariadne quickly shut the female’s sad intrusive thoughts down, and instead gave her a small, but sincere, smile.

“Oh, so she gets to be called Rhi, but I get called ‘Morrigan’?” Rhiannon’s cousin was at the back of the very female, lifting an indignant eyebrow while holding something on her crossed arms that had a blinding, too sparkly color.

“Sorry…Mor,” the blonde’s face lighten up, and she gave Ariadne a big smile before walking up to them.

“Much better. Now, what do you think of this?”

Lifting up the blinding, too sparkly thing she was holding, both Ariadne and Rhiannon contained their horrified faces at the pair of neon blue sparkly socks.

“And those are for…” Rhiannon asked.

“For Azriel, obviously, since the only color he seems to at least like is blue, and he needs a bit more color in his closet than black.”

“Honey, while I agree with you that Azriel does need more color in his closet…that, that would give him a stroke if he ever saw them,” the violet eyed female couldn’t contain her laughter anymore, and Ariadne allowed herself to smile a bit.

“Come on! They…” Mor eyed the socks, then sighed and her shoulders sank in defeat. “They do suck, don’t they?” Rhiannon bursted out a laugh, while Ariadne couldn’t help the little smile at her lips also.

She wasn’t gonna lie, she liked the females, and she had seen why Rhiannon was so fond of Cassian and Azriel, too. But, a part of her, was extremely confused. For one side, she wanted to convince herself she didn’t belong there —maybe because she so obviously didn’t—, yet another part of her really, really wanted to. She wanted to sing as freely as she had been wishing to since the first day Rhiannon took her to the Rainbow and she saw the performers on the streets, she wanted to laugh freely like Mor and Rhiannon did, she wanted to join Cassian’s conversation when he so evidently was trying to include her, but she also felt like, somehow, being here, but mostly enjoying being here —because she was, she really was starting to enjoy life for the first time—, was treason to her people.

It sounded ridiculous, yet…she couldn’t help but feel that way. Fae were monsters, the ones that had enslaved her people for centuries now, she owed all her tragedies to them, yet…here, in Velaris, everything was so peaceful, so…out of her reality, people didn’t look down at her when she was walking on the street, and Rhiannon and her family had never treated her like a slave. The opposite, really, they had tried to convince she didn’t had to be a slave here.

Ariadne’s heart was truly at conflict right now, but that had turned to some sort of inspiration for her in the long run.

One day, she started humming a melody, a random one that came straight from her head, then she started putting words to that melody, random words, words that came from her heart, from all the conflicts in her mind, and, progressively, whenever she was completely alone, she would start mixing those melodie’s and words into songs she would sing for herself.

She hadn’t done that in years. Since her father’s last breath on earth.

They used to do it together; whenever she was afraid, her father would tell her to create a song, to mix random words together, and then he would put a melody to them. The songs would go from how dirty the floor was, to how much her chains hurt, to how bright the stars were.

Years later, she realized her father had done all that in attempts to detach her from their awful reality. It hadn’t worked so well after she grew up and could no longer ignore and detach herself from the cruelness of being born a human.

Yet it had happened again some days ago, when she again visited the Rainbow with Mor and Rhi, she felt it again, the need to put into words and melodies her feelings and thoughts.

It scared her, what that meant.

༺ ♡ ༻

The Winter Solstice was the reason why they had come to Velaris in the first place. The Night Court had a big celebration for this day in particular, since it was the longest night in the year.

Ariadne helped Mor and Rhi to pack their presents. Everyone would be leaving to have a quick dinner with the High Lord and the Lady of Night, then they would come back for the actual celebration between all of them.

They luckily didn’t take her with them, instead left Ariadne in the townhouse with a million protective guards on it. She thanked those hours alone, because she managed to get her hands on some paper and a quill and start writing some of the songs she had been having stuck on her head.

When she was a kid, her father taught her how to read and write, saying she would one day need it to contact her brother. Ariadne had never known how that would ever be possible at all.

Until his lath breath, her father had never stoped believing her brother was alive. They had been separated when the Fae came to capture her family, he had been sent somewhere else, and Ariadne couldn’t even remember his face by now, the last time she had ever seen him was when she had been around 5 years old.

If he was still alive, she would never be able to find him, or him to find her. Not in the world they were living in, as the people the were forced to live like.

She wrote about him in her songs, too. If only because ‘the lost star’ sounded good in a song.

She wrote about the Rainbow, about Velaris, about winged males and females, about blonde beauties and star-filled eyes, and families that felt like a taste of wind for a person that had only ever tasted dirt. All until she heard the door of the house open, and was taken away from her deep concentration.

Ariadne felt a tug of panic for a second, and quickly hid the sheets of paper in the box she had been hiding the rest. Then remembered she wasn’t doing anything bad, and the people that had arrived weren’t guards, only Rhiannon and the others.

She mastered some composure before going downstairs to see the young Fae entering the house.

“How was dinner?” She asked Rhiannon, who rolled her eyes and scoffed slightly.

“Boring, but that is the normal effect my father has on every fun affair, so it could be said that it went just as it was expected. Have you eaten anything?” Ariadne shook her head, she had forgotten about food while being so immerse in her writing.

Rhiannon didn’t give her much time to protest before she was dragging her down to the kitchen, and while everyone else got ready to exchange presents, Rhiannon sat with her and made sure she ate, while complaining about the dinner and her father.

When Ariadne was over, she said she could go back to her room to leave them alone, but both Rhiannon and Morrigan had looked at her as if she had grown a second head and sat her down between them.

“It’s Winter Solstice, Ari, you’ve got to celebrate!” Rhiannon had encouraged, and Ariadne accepted the invitation.

She didn’t have anything to gift them, since she got no money whatsoever. So she couldn’t help but feel bad when Mor had pulled out a pair of ugly socks and given them to her.

“To keep you warm,” she had said, and Ariadne had almost cried.

She had never received a present before. And even tho the socks were terribly ugly, the thought had been beautiful.

“Bitch! I wanted to give her my present first,” Rhiannon said, scoffing at not being the first to give Ariadne a present.

Ariadne swallowed the gulp in her throat while Rhiannon pulled out a little box and handed it to her.

When she opened it, Ariadne couldn’t help but gasp at the sight of the small black pearl necklace.

“This is…” She looked up at the female, her eyes inevitably holding some tears now.

“To honor the day we met,” Rhiannon said with a smile, taking the Night Pearl necklace and putting it on Ariadne.

She had only been given two gifts, but those gifts were more than she had ever possessed in her life.

“Thank…” her voice broke, and she swallowed hard to avoid the tremble in her next words. “Thank you, I’m sorry I-”

“Don’t even apologize for that, Ariadne,” Rhiannon stoped her before she could apologize for not getting her and Mor something, and the blonde female only hugged her tightly and told her in a whisper that she could consider her gift as a thank you for helping her with the other gifts, since for the first time ever, nobody had nothing bad to say about her presents.

“I…got something for you, too,” the shock she had been was interrupted by Azriel’s voice.

When Ariadne raised her head, she saw he was talking to her. She couldn’t help but to open her eyes and mouth in shock.

“For- for me?” They hadn’t talked much since they met, Ariadne was shy, and he was not a male of small chatter, either, but they had both shared something; little acknowledging, understanding looks when they saw each other’s scars.

Two days ago, Azriel had found her scratching intensely her wrists, since it was the first timeher skin ever got a chance to heal at all from the chain’s damage. He had helped her, prepared some hot water for her to relax the itching, then showed her his hands, and briefly told her the story of the scars in them.

She had then understood why Rhiannon had fallen for him. They were a perfect match, and he was a companionate male, she hadn’t helped but feel happy Rhiannon had someone like him by her side —even if they weren’t official, everyone else around them knew they would be.

“What is it?” She asked with her mouth dry in astonishment when the male nodded slightly.

“It’s a tonic for your…” Azriel pulled a little bottle out of his leathers, and looked down and her wrists and ankles.

At her scars.

“Oh,” now she was absolutely out of not only words, but breath as well.

“Rhys’ mom bought it for me a long time ago, and it really did helped me with…” he looked down at his own scars. “It won’t heal the scars, but it will make them less painful and scratchy, I promise.”

Now the tears in her eyes were almost imposible to hold. She murmured a shaky thank you, and took Azriel’s hand so he could feel the shaking in hers and understand just how thankful she really was. The male smiled slightly at her, and put a hand on her shoulder, squeezing slightly.

“Ok ok, my turn!” Cassian pushed Azriel aside to hand Ariadne his gift.

He handed her a leather notebook, wrapped perfectly with a purple ribbon.

When Ariadne looked at him a little confused, he smiled proudly and got way too close to her, almost making her back away for the surprise, and leaning in her ear.

“So you can write all those songs I’ve been hearing you sing.”

When he backed away, his smile was compassionate and light.

“I didn’t…I couldn’t get you anything, I’m sorry,” her voice shook, as much as she tried to avoid it, and she felt the first tear rolling down her cheek before she could stop it.

This people…they had known her for so little, specially Azriel and Cassian, and yet…

“Come on, a hug will suffice!” Before she could move or say anything, Cassian wrapped her in his arms and lifted her up slightly.

She had never received such a warm hug. Not since her mother died, at least. And it was in that moment that Ariadne couldn’t help but silently cry while she allowed Cassian to hug her, and she herself wrapped her arms around the big male.

“Happy Solstice, Ariadne,” both him and Azriel said when Cassian put her back down.

She was out of breath, out of words. She kept her head down so they wouldn’t see the tears streaming down het face.

“I’m sorry, can you…can you give me a moment? May I…” She made the best attempt to wipe away her tears and looked back at Rhiannon, wanting to ask for permission.

The female obviously noticed her red, crystallized eyes, and immediately stood up to take the potion and the notebook from her hands.

“Of course you can, you don’t have to ask, Ari, go,” the violet eyed female smiled understandingly, and nodded towards the exit of the common room.

Ariadne thanked everyone in a low voice, then hurried out before she could keep making a fool of herself with the tears that did not wait to keep appearing.

༺ ♡ ༻

The balcony was the only place she finally found a bit of calm in. She could still hear the laughter coming from inside the house, but she tried to focus on the stars on top of her head than in the pounding of her heart.

It was surreal, all of this. The people inside, the gifts they had gotten her…everything felt like a story of her own songs, and not her reality.

She wasn’t mad about it, not even sad. She discovered that while she stared at the sky and silently talked to the stars. That’s what scared her the most. That she wasn’t really against this whole thing, that she was actually, for the first time in her life, not feeling fear, not feeling dread, not feeling anger. For the first time in her life, there were tiny moments during the day she forgot to feel all those things.

Ariadne took a deep breath, trying to absorb the star’s serene energy, to take in the happiness and peace in the air and keep it in her heart for as long as she could.

Then the window to the balcony opened, and the strangest feeling rose in her neck at the presence that came in.

She didn’t had to turn around, by the way the hairs in her neck stood on end, she already knew who was standing behind her even before he spoke.

“I got you a present, too, but I didn’t got to give it to you before you left,” Rhysand said, the window to the inside of the house closing behind him.

When Ariadne turned around, she had the chance to take him in, truly take him in. His wings were out, relaxed, just as his shoulders were as well. His eyes had a unique light Ariadne had only seen shining in the stars, and his face was much more handsome in the moonlight, as if the night literally suited him to perfection.

Here, in Velaris, it seemed as if Rhysand relaxed into a new person completely, gone were the scowls she had so often seen him make, the furrowed brows and the sharp edges of his face. It was as if the city soften him, or maybe it was the people inside the house, or both, she would dare say.

“I’m sorry, I-”

“No need to apologize, or to explain yourself. You’re not at court, Ariadne,” he rushed to cut her words off, a small, relaxed smile on his beautifully thin lips.

“Rhiannon tells me that all the time,” she sighed, leaning in the railing of the balcony.

“Because it’s the truth,” Rhysand approached her side, taking the same position she was, leaning in by her left.

“But for how long? Rhysand? A couple days more?” She looked at him, both harshness and tiredness dripping off her tone.

She had noticed that, only with Rhysand, she found herself being insolent, a little too much herself, some times. Maybe it was the way he purposely drove her to act like that, or something else entirely she hadn’t stop to think about.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to sound so harsh,” she adverted her eyes from his violet ones.

“Yes, yes you did,” her head snapped back at him, just in time to see the tiniest smile in his lips before he quickly took it back and pulled out something from a pocket of his black pants. “Here,” it was a thin, simple envelope, with only her name written in front of it.

“What is it?” She took it in her hands, and stared at him with a confused frown.

“Your Solstice present,” he answered with a tone of obviousness that made her want to roll her eyes, but she abstained from as she carefully opened the envelope.

Ariadne pulled out two papers from it, and stared at them in utter confusion.

“I’m sorry, I have no Idea what this is,” she admitted to Rhysand, and the male cocked his head to one side with a grin.

“They’re theater tickets, for tomorrow night.”

“Theatre?” Ariadne opened her eyes, this time in surprise, while Rhysand only raised a nonchalant shoulder, putting his hands in his pockets.

“I’ve noticed you like to hum to yourself when you think no one’s hearing. And Rhiannon mentioned how your eyes practically lit up when you saw the performers at the Rainbow. So I thought you might enjoy a function.”

Something in her chest tighten at the thought Rhysand being this attentive towards her. But it still didn’t surprise her that much, he always seemed to know how to read her before she learned how to read him.

“That’s…really thoughtful, thank you,” she smiled, genuinely smiled at him for the first time since they had met.

“But…” Ariadne raised her eyes from the tickets in her hands to look at him, one eyebrow higher than the other.

“But?”

“There’s a but,” it wasn’t exactly a question.

“There’s no…” Now it was his turn to raise an eyebrow, and when Ariadne saw the amusement in his violet eyes, she sighed and lowered her head again. “Okay fine, there is a but,” she swallowed hard, not being able to gather the courage to look up as she talked. “I don’t…know what a theatre is,” she felt stupid, as if it was something she should know by logic, but Rhysand didn’t mock her or made fun of her in any way, but instead seemed to be unaware of the little smirk that slipped on him.

“You will, tomorrow night.”

Ariadne simply nodded, and sighed when silence settled over them. Something in her heart was threatening to pound so hard she knew he would hear her if he concentrated, so she quickly opened her mouth to avoid that happening, if it hadn’t already did.

“There’s two,” she held out the two pieces of paper, and Rhysand nodded.

“Great observation.”

“There’s two because…” Ariadne raised one of her eyebrows, and he gave an only step closer.

“Because I will go with you.”

At his words, she tried harder to lower the overwhelming beats of her heart, knowing for a fact Rhysand had already had to hear it. Ariadne swallowed discreetly, and raised a questioning eyebrow.

“You will?”

“Yes,” he answered with no hesitation, making her look up at him.

There was only pure, total seriousness in his violet gaze, making Ariadne all the more confused.

“Why?” She couldn’t help the tone of her question, and quickly bit her words down at how harsh it had sounded.

“Don’t flatter yourself, Ariadne, I bought two because I love the theatre,” he shifted his weight on his feet as if uncomfortable, putting his hands in his pockets and adverting his eyes from hers.

Ariadne cursed herself internally for not figuring that out earlier. And felt embarrassed as she look down to the two theatre tickets.

“Yeah, right. Im sorry.”

Silence settled for a long while, Ariadne waited eagerly for him to walk away and stop making her feel the hot shame on her cheeks, yet that did not happen, as Rhysand never seemed to get the hint of her heartbeats sounding like hammers against her chest.

“So…are you coming with me, Ariadne?” Her name rolled off his tongue like sweet honey, coating each syllable with slow precision.

Ariadne raised her head towards him again, analyzing the harshness and softness of his stare, the angles of his face that hinted something else hidden in those sharp lines.

Today had been an unbelievable day, one full of feelings she had never thought she could feel again, and so it may have been those mixed feelings that made her heart flutter with the tiniest bit of excitement, and smile at the male staring at her with galaxies in his eyes to mutter words she probably will regret later.

“I would love to.”

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ae-neon · 1 year

Text

Elain is Elain. Nesta is...Illyrian??

Sjm's attempt at a slur? Maybe.

There's this moment Feyre tells Rhysand he has to either forgive lol both her sisters or treat them both badly girl if you don't

And he says "Elain is Elain"

I don't think he meant anything bad by this. Like somehow, good and bad, he can accept different sides of her. It probably has to do with the way Elain shrinks herself, doesn't get in his way or step on anybody's toes. It's probably just misogyny.

BUT I have seen good takes on how this is condescending bs so that's probably up to personal interpretation. It's probably just misogyny the remix.

Then he says something like "Nesta is... Illyrian. And I mean that as a compliment." but he definitely doesn't mean that as a compliment lol?? In fact more often than not "Illyrian" as a reference to people and culture (not weapons or fighting) is used as a derogatory statement.

Like what is Rhys trying to say? Illyrian women live in an extremely misogynistic society that mutilates them as common practice. So it's not exactly like they're known as fierce and independent. And if they were wouldn't that be a good thing considering how they're treated? Is he talking about the men then ?? Is he saying Nesta has the spirit of an Illyrian warrior or some shit?

Essentially all Nesta did was openly not like Elon and the Gang but lots of people do that? Is Tamlin an Illyrian too? Beron?

It's not a compliment.

Everyone in the IC is racist towards the Illyrians and that attitude is perpetuated by the 3 bat bitches themselves. That's how Feyre, who didn't even know what an Illyrian was, comes to form her own prejudices against them - because she's taught racism. All the while appropriating their culture.

It's obviously more nuanced irl but it's like constantly degrading black people and black cultures and then saying you called someone "ghetto" as a compliment. (From an own voice perspective)

Like in the mouth of someone else? maybe, but with a track record of prejudice and racism?? it's highly unfucking likely.

Even tho at the end of the day Rhysand's beloved fridge women were Illyrians too? Is he saying his dead mother and sister acted like Nesta? Probably not. It's a common hypocrisy shown by moc who approximate whiteness. So him being Illyrian and having female Illyrian relatives means nothing. Ask any woc.

"Nesta is Illyrian" was a derogatory statement on both ends.

One hilarious thing about sjm being a typical white feminist is that her subconscious commentary on moc is so spot on because moc and white women are each other's natural equal opposites

#acotar #sjm critical #anti rhysand #anti azriel #anti cassian #anti ic #nesta archeron #elain archeron #anti sjm #anti inner circle #racism in fantasy #nesta deserves better

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epersonae · 10 months

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Because you said we could ask anything I wanted to ask about the whole meta level to the whole "rpf but not rpf" thing? I feel dense for not picking up on whatever is being commented on but I haven't been able to pinpoint anything.

Then again I'm not an RPF person at ALL but I've been following your stuff and I blew through WFU like it was nothing so there must be something special going on.

Before I get into it, this is the first time I've tried to put any of these thoughts in writing other than in rambly DMs, mostly I've thought about this out loud or talked in voice chat or a few times in person, so it may be a bit incoherent!

I'm also tagging in @gaypiratebrainrot, who I'm sure will have a quite different but intersecting take - I took what they did and ran with it in my own way. (I feel exceptionally fortunate to have had them both as an editor and as a friend who encouraged my various ramblings on this topic.)

That said, below the cut are my thoughts about the "meta level", which I think fall into two categories: constructing characters and the role of fanfiction inside of the story.

First, the whole process of constructing characters. For me, it was a very deliberate thing; with Ed and Stede, it's figuring out how to balance the canon characters and (the public perception of) the people who perform them. This, with the bonus complication of the actors having talked about how they feel about the characters in relationship to themselves, for me at least makes for a very self-aware writing experience. (And an entirely new conception of parasociality, I think it permanently changed my mental landscape!)

In WFU this is also addressed directly in the text by the characters themselves talking about AUs:

“It’s sort of like, you take the essence of the characters and their dynamic, and see how they might behave in different worlds,” Wee John says. “It’s experimental. You’ve got your coffee shop alternate universes, your sci-fi alternate universes, your actor alternate universes—” “Yeah, but, like, isn’t this the actor alternate universe,” Frenchie says, gesturing around them. “Like, Stede and Ed are kinda like alternate timeline Rhys and Taika.” “No, no,” Wee John says. “It’s all about transporting enough elements of the character for it to read like the same person, just living a different life. You couldn’t just write a story about Ed and Stede and call them Rhys and Taika.” “It’s kinda like, reinforcing the idea of some inherent self, though,” Frenchie says. “Like, as if we have some kind of soul that would be consistent across circumstances, instead of all of us being dynamic living bodies that are massively shaped by the events of our lives. Whole thing sorta reeks of cartesian dualism.”

There was a great post that I saw recently that talked about AUs and understanding what are the core aspects of characters in the canon and how to translate them into a new setting, using the term "concretes", which I immediately added to my vocabulary. So these guys, WFU Ed and WFU Stede, have this strange mix of concretes (both canon and fanon), and in writing my piece, I'm also trying to match the concretes of WFU while expanding out the universe that they exist in. (This is true to a lesser extent of other characters who have a one-to-one match canon to IRL, which hasn't yet come up in my work but does a little bit later tho it is in my other fic of WFU, a secret third thing.)

Which leads me to the construction of Mary and the unnamed wife (her interior-to-my-head name is Carlita, fwiw; I actually have a "alignment chart" of variations of her name that maybe I'll throw onto this post) - because they don't match that pattern. Which made me conscious on a different level of how I was creating these amalgams: the vanishingly small amount of information I know about either Rosie Carnahan-Darby or Rita Ora or Carly Rae Jepsen, and deliberately so! I didn't want to write RPF; I wanted to match the not quite one thing or the other of WFU, and so these two women are amalgams in a different way, with different ingredients, and they're also constructed from archetypes: the Manager Wife and the Pop Star, and the whole cultural soup around those ideas.

(I have a whole separate thought about the character of Javid Denkins but that's kind of a spoiler at this point. tl;dr: It's a very goddamn funny joke that ends up having bonus meaning.)

I am forever grateful for a specific little bit of canon that was in WFU, because it let me do something different in my work: Ed takes his coffee with seven sugars (and a little bit of godawful creamer), and so when Mary and the wife meet and have coffee, suddenly that has meaning in comparison to Ed. A canon bit of goofery can become something about diet culture, and that gets to be a whole new thematic thread through the story.

And then there's fanfiction as a story element within the fanfiction. We handle it very differently, I think, between my work and WFU, because we're looking at different aspects and from different perspectives. Among other things, it fundamentally changed my approach to learn that both Rita and Carly Rae had RPF written about them over a decade ago, when both women were in their 20s.

But in both cases, fanfiction is woven through as both contrast and mirror to the story, which is of course itself fanfiction. In both stories, Ed's fic reading habits say something about him and Mary's attitudes (about RPF in particular!) say something about her. The wife's reactions to both of these things, as well as her prior experience, shape how she interacts with them. The existence of tropes or characters say something about us, the readers and writers, as well as about the world that these stories' characters live in.

For me, both the fanfiction element and the character construction end up being partially about how much is it ever possible to know anything about another person. The obvious limits, in the case of someone who is in the public eye - I love this bit from WFU: "built [...] from a handful of Youtube interviews, my Twitter feed, and a level of horniness that would fix the climate crisis if only we could harness it for renewables", and I started joking that the wife was "three youtube videos and an architectural digest article in a trenchcoat", even though it's quite a bit more complicated than that.

But not just famous people: Mary makes assumptions about Ed and his wife based on their public personas; Ed makes assumptions about Mary based on pieces of past history through the lens of his feelings for Stede, and the wife's exploration includes piecing together information from Mary's social media and Ed's fic reading habits. All we can ever know about another person is what we observe, whether that's a public persona or their words and behavior. (There's a secret third level of how much can one ever know about oneself, but that's probably a different post.) And that circles back around to the writer and the reader: how much do we know about the canon characters? the famous people? the characters in the story?

(MASSIVE shout out to the phenomenal beta team of @gaypiratebrainrot, @veeagainsttheday, and @emi--rose for pointing out where I needed to really boost this question of who knows how much of what and when. Their incredibly smart observations did so much to help me bring out that theme among others.)

I don't know if that even answers your question, but it's some of the extra material that's been in my head as I've been writing and editing. I also had never read any RPF (with the curious exception of a notable No Reservations - Narnia crossover) before WFU and it basically melted my brain, which I have continued to process through the experience of writing for the benefit of all the broken hearts. So yeah, something different going on here for sure.

#anon asks #my writing #my fic #the conscious effort of Making Some Guys (gn) out of parts did something to my brain #(I'm not mad about it)#also a thing I've said about RO more than once: everything I know about her I've learned entirely against my will #but I just stole bits and pieces as they fit the story I wanted to tell #hope I am anywhere in the vicinity of answering your question anon #also all the folks I tagged: pls add on with your thoughts #this philosophy shit is easy

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unhealthyfanobsession · 2 years

Note

Angsty prompt with Nesta recovery arc: day of her wedding is soured when Cassian is once again distracted by Mor, whom she reluctantly invited as a bridesmaid per his request. Feyre has been more enamored with the wedding itself than reassuring Nesta’s nerves. Rhys is holding the check over her head even tho she insisted he didn’t need to pay. Amren is just being a bitch and souring the whole evening with her attitude against marriage. (Perhaps an omen?)

Finally done with being second, she sneaks out the back with The Valkyries in tow and a couple hundred bucks Eris gives her (was supposed to be a wedding gift but better suited as a runaway bride advance - he’s loving it! Much blessings and thank you for the drama!!) and roads trips to anywhere with her best friends. A weekend of clarity and a phone discarded in some church bathroom.

Creative liberties to the writer - you never disappoint!

Ok so if you squint then I kind of fulfilled what you asked for … I started with good intentions I swear but it just took on a life if it’s own! Always dangerous to give me creative liberty 😉

“You look so beautiful,” Elain smiled. She smiled and for a second Nesta almost believed her. Almost deluded herself into thinking that this happy, gentle, sweet, make no conflicts version of Elain was real and not just a facade she put up to avoid sharing Nesta’s fate.

Not that Nesta’s fate was bad. It was good, of course. It worked out. Everything worked out exactly as it was supposed to. Right?

Nesta placed her hand over Elain’s on her shoulder and smiled back, “Just like the drawings.”

Nesta pretended she didn’t see Feyre’s eyes flicker dark even as the first ounce of genuine light entered Elain’s.

“Drawings?” It was the first word Mor had spoken all day - a fact that Nesta had been, up until this second, extraordinarily glad of. She had invited Mor to her bridal suite (or whatever it was called for a mating ceremony) out of courtesy more than anything else. Respect for her relationship with Cassian - confusing and annoying as it was- and because she knew Mor was the sort of girl who would die to see a wedding dress before everyone else.

She was right on that score if the way the blonde’s entire spine straightened up the second Gwyn clasped together then final pearl-inlaid button was any indication.

“Nesta and Elain used to draw their wedding dresses on the back of sheet music when they were supposed to be studying piano.” Feyre’s delivery was simple and free of bitterness. Mor’s eyes were not.

“You didn’t joint them?”

“Feyre was never a fan of girly things like that,” Elain’s jaw worked hard with the force of her plastered on smile. “We asked her to draw a wedding dress with us once and she drew a huntsman’s cloak instead.”

Feyre grinned at the memory, “I did, didn’t I?”

“More practical, you said.” Nesta didn’t add that Feyre repeated the sentiment again once they were back in the cottage and her and Elain were fantasizing about their wedding gowns while Feyre was hunting.

“But you love beautiful dresses,” Mor half pouted. Yes, Feyre loved to go shopping and feel silks and dress in starlight with her new friends.

“I like wearing beautiful dresses when they are placed in front of me as Rhys and you do … I don’t spend my free time thinking of them.”

Nesta felt Elain’s hand clamp tighter on her shoulder. She squeezed back in acknowledgment. The shared frustration.

“I suppose you had more important thing to think about.”

Was this going to be the rest of Nesta’s life? Waiting for Cassian in a pretty dress while his family reminded her of every sin she committed as a child? Would he defend her? Would he tell Mor to stop, if he was here? Would these subtle jabs and hairpin pricks ever cease? Shouldn’t Nesta know the answers to these questions before she accepted eternity?

Choosing Cassian had never been easy, but it had always been worth it. His family though …

No.

Not his family.

Just Mor.

What did it say that Nesta trusted more entirely in Rhysand to defend her against Mor’s comments than her own mate? Rhysand who wouldn’t stop showering her in gifts and wouldn’t hear a single bad word about her from anyone. Rhysand who took a debt for a debt. A language he and Nesta understood completely. Rhysand who owed Nesta 3 lives that he would never repay. That she never wanted him to repay.

Cassian owed her nothing but himself. And it was enough. Cauldron and mother and wall and old human gods, it was enough. But … was it enough when he was not there?

That had always been the question, hadn’t it.

Hand stitched silk tightened around Nesta’s middle. Squeezing her organs together and trapping her nerve somewhere deep inside her rib cage.

A huntsman’s cloak, her little sister wanted.

Ironic, that so many years later she sent a huntsman to trap her wicked elder sister’s heart.

And of course he succeeded.

For a very long time Nesta convinced herself that it didn’t matter, if he trapped her heart or she gave it willingly. But suddenly, in this room, with Elain’s hand pressing down on her shoulder and Mor’s glare so thinly veiled and her sins splashed across Feyre’s face even on this day … suddenly, nothing mattered more.

“It’s ok,” Elain whispered. “Do it for both of us.”

Gwyn’s eyes shot up, bright teal reflecting off of shining white. Emerie stood where she had been watching quietly from the corner.

“Any summit,” her Illyrian sister said. “Any battle.” Her gaze flickered to Mor and the High Lady. “Any choice.”

And just like that, her organs loosened. Shifted back to their proper spot, floating free among her blood and muscle.

Nesta wanted to run, and if she did, more people in this room would cover her tracks than try to claw her back.

She was not where she was all those months ago. She was better. She was freer. She was … loved.

Loved by her sisters. Blood and found.

Loved by her brothers (in-law but every bit annoying enough to count as the real thing)

Loved by her mate.

Loved by … loved by herself.

And that made all the difference.

With one foot out the door, Nesta did something she never could have done a year ago. She admitted what she truly needed in that instant. “Everyone get out.”

They did. Without question.

And with a single tug of a golden string…

“Cold feet, sweetheart?”

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