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#big boy your new bff
catfindr · 5 months
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𝐏𝐥𝐮𝐬 𝐎𝐧𝐞
Pairing: childhood bff!Chan x fem!reader (non-idol au) Word count: 3.4k Genre: Fluff 🥰💖, Smut 🔥❤️ (angst if you squint) Warning: Weddings... (lord help me), pro best friend chan, mentions of familial favoritism, semi rough sex? , soft dom!chan, sweet name calling(babygirl, princess), slightly jealous chan, comfort, lord someone teach me how to make better warnings, i think thats all? (someone needs to teach me to proof read.)
A/N: THANK YOU FOR 100 FOLLOWERS I LOVE YOU <3 I'm working on improving the formating of my works so >.> bare with me if some of the stuff doesnt translate over well on different devices, especially the text message part >.>
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When you were young, you often got compared to your sister, your sister who loved pink and poodles and tutu skirts. She was younger than you by a year and yet, she always out did you, always was a step ahead, always beating you in everything. Yeah, you loved her, but the pain of comparison drove a wedge between you two.
You were 5 when you met Chan. He was very silly, always playing games and smiling, you happened to attend the same school and after he stood up for you against an older boy at the park you two were inseparable.
Chan, who sang for you. Chan, who shared his food with you. Chan, who taught you how to dance. Chan, who teased you for acting like a nerd. Chan, who was your best friend.
Chan was sitting on the couch in your apartment, watching a cringey romantic comedy with you when your phone rang. You gave it a glance and cringed, your grandmother's name appeared on the screen with a image of the woman with an almost plastic smile.
"You should probably answer." Chan said, "Would make it worse if you didn't."
You gave your best friend a side eye. "Nah really?"
He laughed lightly as you answered the phone.
"Hi, honey, you are joining us this year for the whole family get-together aren't you?" The old woman's voice came through the speaker to your ear.
"Of course Grandma-" You started.
"That's what you said last year, and you didn't come."
You made a face, the reason you hadn't gone was because you were sick. "Things happen Grandma."
"And the year before that?"
You pursed your lips, glancing at Chan. You weren't avoiding your family really you were just... avoiding the conflict that ensued when you were with your family. And by conflict you meant the constant onslaught of questions and disappointed looks you got whenever your family asked about anything you were doing with your life.
"And anyway, it's been so long since we've heard from you, we want to see how you've been, keep the family together, bring new people in along the way." Your grandma sounded so happy.
"What do you mean?" You were confused by the "bring new people".
"Oh dear. Did your sister not tell you?" Your grandma sighed, "She has a surprise for us this year."
You sighed. Your little sister always was one better than you, or two, or ten...
"Y/n?" Your grandma's voice brought you out of your daze and Chan leaned forward looking at your face.
"I'll be there this year grandma, I promise."
"Alright. Bye bye honey."
"Bye..." You said in a small voice hanging up.
Chan smiled slightly at you. "So?"
"Help."
His eyes widened slightly before darting around. "You know I really would if I could read minds but it's awfully sad I cant."
You rolled your eyes at the man. "My family dislikes everything I do."
"And?" Chan leaned back, raising a brow.
"They don't dislike you."
"What are you trying to do here?"
You clasped your hands and gave your best friend the most innocent pure pleading gaze. "Come with me, so they won't hate on me."
Chan made a face. "No-"
"I'll pay for the wifi in your apartment for the next two- four months." You grabbed your friend's big hands in yours, "Please!"
"Just because they don't hate me doesn't mean they won't hate on you." Chan said exasperated.
"BUT they'll find someone to compare to you so I won't have to be put down by this." You give him a pleading look.
"Y/n. I've done a lot of dum shit before this is my limit."
"Channie!" You begged. "Come on! I'll pay your netflix subscription too!"
Chan groaned. "Fine! You're making me feel guilty."
"AH! You're the best Chan." You smiled hugging you friend.
He rolled his eyes and patted your hair. "You're lucky netflix is expensive."
So there you were dinner, with your family, your grandmother quick to jump and compliment Chan and compare your father and uncles to him when they were his age. Everyone complimenting your sister and asking her what the big news was. Your dad looked about ready to leave when your younger sister stood. tapping her spoon against her glass gently.
You looked at her, she smiled at you, a smile you couldn't read.
"I have a big announcement to make." She looked at her boyfriend. "Well.. we have a big announcement to make."
"What is it dear?" Your mother asked.
"We're getting married!" Your little sister jumped and smiled. Everyone started clapping.
The initial excitement and congratulations ended, leaving a gently chattering at the table.
Cue your grandmother.
"Y/n dear, what about you?"
Silence.
Everyone looked at you.
Your sister sighed slightly. "Granny, you can't pester her. Give her time, she might get married before 40."
A soft laugh rippled over the table, you stared at your little sister. She smiled innocently, your fist clenched under the table. So what if she was younger and prettier and more successful. You made a move to excuse yourself but Chan grabbed your fist under the table, you relaxed your grip and his fingers slipped between yours and squeezed gently. Your heart skipped a beat and you looked up at your best friend, smiling.
Her Majesty the Queen 01:53 She was obviously out to get you.
Butt Hunter 01:53 I agree
🐶 01:54 Go to the wedding in white.
Baby Chick 01:54 💀
. Me 01:54 I'm NOT going to my sister's wedding in white!
Beanie boy 01:54 He's giving real solutions here.
Squirrel 01:55 Just don't go?
Bread. 01:55 All you do is avoid conflict.
Squirrel 01:55 NO I DONT
Noodle Spirit Survivor. 01:56 shut up. it's 2 in the fucking morning.
. Me 01:56 Sorry Chan, we'll shut up now.
Beanie boy 01:56 Erm actually it's 1:56 AM
🐶 01:56 It's called silent old man.
Bread. 01:56 LMFAO
Baby Chick 01:56 LOL
Butt Hunter 01:56 I don't think his phone box has a silent button.
Squirrel 01:57 😭
Her Majesty the Queen 01:57 💀
You put your phone down and picked up the invitation to your sister's wedding, 4 months... all you had was 4 months to get someone to go to the wedding with. You sighed, going to the app store and downloaded for the nth time, tinder. Cringing.
You had four months to at least meet some expectations, get a nice guy for maybe a month or two, ask him to be your plus one to your sister's wedding then what? You shrugged to yourself and shoved your phone under your pillow before going to sleep.
Chan realized he was screwed, he watched you get ready for another date.
"Honestly." You sighed sitting down to put on your makeup. "I might just go with a random guy. Or maybe I could take Hyunjin or Jisung."
He pursed his lips. Was he even an option for you? What made this guy from tinder so important you had to doll yourself up to go see him. Chan bit his lip, you were his best friend, he could fix the problem, he could be your plus one, he could ask. but he didn't. He was too scared to.
He remembered his conversation with Changbin and Minho a few days earlier. Maybe he was being too much of a pussy. He'd known you for ages, he knew how you liked your coffee and the music that calmed you down, he knew what part in silly romance movies made you cry, he knew when you were uncomfortable and when you were too angry to speak.
"If you keep beating around the bush with how you feel you might never get a chance."
Changbin's words rang in his ears and he bit his lip.
"Y/n what if-" He started.
The doorbell rang as you finished applying your lip stick. "Oh, I gotta go Channie." You stood and hugged him. "Wish me luck."
"Good luck." Chan gave you a small smile and the moment you were out the door he was cursing himself for not stopping you. "Damnit."
Chan wished he hadn't wished you luck. You and Seokmin, your date, apparently hit it off. For the next two and a half weeks Chan felt like a third wheel in his own friendship with you, if you weren't on the phone with Seokmin, you were texting him, and if you weren't texting him, you were talking about him.
It really came to a head when Hyunjin invited the entirety of the group chat to go out for karaoke and you were busy with Seokmin the day off.
It hand't really been his intention to show up at your place angry, just the thought of you not just ghosting him but the whole friend group. He knocked a few times. no response.
Chan knocked again. he still got no response. Sure the key in the dirt of the potted plant hanging under the sign of your apartment number was for emergencies only, but this was an emergency. (to him anyway.)
Chan opened the door and entered your apartment, expecting to hear lewd sounds or... what else was he really expecting. But as he approached your door his heart ached. It wasn't a sound he heard often from you but it was one he could recognize any day. Chan pushed the door open slowly. You sat on your bed, hugging a pillow, eyes red and puffy, tears streaking your face, you didn't notice him until he closed the door gently behind himself.
"Are you okay?" he asked quietly.
You quickly wiped your tears. "Of course, why wouldn't I be?"
Chan sighed. "Come here." He sat on the bed and opened his arms.
You leaned into him muttering, "Seokmin is a dumass."
"What happened?" Chan asked, rubbing your shoulder gently.
"He blocked me." You sniffed. "Out of the fucking blue."
Chan hummed softly. "His loss."
You looked up at your friend, "You're so dum."
"Nuh uh, I think I'm pretty smart princess." Chan smiled gently.
"I don't think so." You laughed softly.
He looked down at you. "'M smart enough to stay your friend."
You nod slightly, "I stayed attached to you at the hip is more like it."
"Didn't have a problem with it."
"Chan." You rubbed your friend's arm.
"Hm?"
"Go with me."
"Where?" he asked dumbly.
You sat up and flicked his forehead. "You know where."
"I don't get anything out of it." He rubbed his forehead.
"I'll uh..."
"Worry about it later." He huffed and stood, smoothing your hair. "Should we get (comfort food)?"
"I was wondering when you'd ask." You punched him softly and led the way out of your room.
The day of the wedding you were wearing a long pastel blue dress, and Chan a matching suit, it wasn't the first time you'd matched with your best friend, but this felt more special. Your grandmother and parents gave you side ways glances during the wedding procession, and once the reception had started so did your grandma's vulture like flocking.
"Y/N i really thought you would've come with someone other than Chan, maybe your sister was right you just need time." the old woman sighed.
You sucked in a breathe but Chan grabbed your hand under the table, his words making you freeze, "Is there a problem with me attending as her boyfriend?"
You turned to Chan and he squeezed your hand as if urging you to play along.
Your grandmother looked at you stunned. "What? Since when?"
"The dinner really opened my eyes, maybe guys don't approacher because I'm around, I do look like her boyfriend don't I?" He glanced at you, "Why not give it a shot?"
Your family must have heard your grandmother's cry because your mother and father came over a few moments later and you watched as Chan worked his charm, a mask on his face the entirety of the time.
Your sister looked between you and Chan, blinking quite a bit. As your parents congratulated you on not being single for the first time, you felt like you out did your sister, you looked at Chan, he smiled gently at you and your heart jumped.
After a lot of drinks and cake you decided it was time to head home.(Chan had to drag you out.)
The ride back to your apartment was quiet, you were too buzzed to speak and Chan was focused on driving.
Chan smiled softly, glancing at you. "Wasn't so bad was it?"
You took a moment before you spoke. "Did you mean what you said?"
Chan's brows furrowed, "About what?"
"Did you actually think of me like that after the dinner?" You looked at him.
Chan sucked a breath, squeezing the wheel. "Would you believe me if I said yes."
"I don't have a reason not to."
Chan pulled off the highway onto the smaller road that lead through the city and to your apartment.
"Well?" You asked.
Chan bit his lip and nodded. "I meant what I said."
You remained quiet until he pulled into your apartment complex. And even after he got you into your apartment. You stood there, looking at... Chan. Chan who knew you better than you knew yourself, Chan who always calmed you down, Chan who got angry for you, Chan who bought you food when you were sad and held you until you grew tired of it(you never did you never could), Chan your...
"You meant it?" You were completely sober now, picking up the conversation as if you hadn't been silent for the past half hour.
Chan nodded.
"Is that all there is to it?"
"No." he breathed, stepping closer to you.
"Tell me. What else?" You asked quietly.
"How do I even begin?" He laughed slightly. "I'm sorry-"
"Why are you apologizing?" You looked at him confused.
"For not telling you how I felt from the get go." he smiled, "If there's anything that makes me sleep at night it's you, if there's any place I feel safe it's with you. You make me more happy than I can describe with words alone, there isn't another person I'd be with in any life." He reached and caressed your cheek. "I wanted to fight myself when I let you go out with Seokmin. I want you, I need you, I..." He paused, scanning your face for a signal, any sign to keep going.
"You're going to shut up now when you're at the climax of your speech?" You laughed slightly.
He smiled and rolled his eyes, "I love you. I always have."
"You're really an idiot." You kissed him gently.
Chan blinked in shock. "I-"
You smiled, proud of yourself. "Now-"
Chan grabbed your face and pressed his lips to yours again, you stared for a moment before relaxing into the kiss wrapping your arms around his neck. His tongue fighting yours before he pushed into your mouth to taste you, biting your lip gently.
"Wanted to do that for so long." He breathed against your lips, pulling away slowly.
You grabbed his collar. "If you don't finish what you started I will."
Chan's eyes widened and a smirk grew on his face. He kissed you again and his hand moved to the back of your dress. "May I, princess?"
"You may." You giggled as he removed the dress and your made quick work of his buttons before he shrugged off the jacket and shirt, picking you up and carrying you to the bed.
You squeaked as he threw you onto the bed and got on top you. "Nervous?" he asked laughing lightly.
"No... Of course not." You said looking away.
He smiled and turned your head to face him kissing you passionately before he moved to suck a dark mark just next to your jaw. "So pretty, just for me."
You gasped softly and nodded. "Just for you Channie." Chan continued his assault on your neck before removing your bra and smiling at your chest, he kissed your lips gently. "This is my favorite part of you," He moved to kiss your chest, sucking a nipple into his mouth and biting gently, relishing in the cry that escaped your lips, "But this is second best."
You blushed, "Stop doing that?"
"Doing what?" Chan chuckled against your right breast, pinching the left.
"You-"
"Huh?" He kissed down your belly and bit hard beside your belly button.
"Ow-" You gasped and grabbed his hair.
"Gotta make sure they know you're taken if you wear a crop top." he murmured and moved lower kissing your thigh and pulling your legs apart. "This is mine hm? I think I waited for it long enough." He kissed your thigh before pulling your pantie off. He tossed it haphazardly over his shoulder. He took amount to admire you and you shifted slightly.
"Channie. You're staring." You muttered.
"That a problem princess?"
"Pervert." You rolled your eyes as Chan tugged you to the edge fo the bed.
He rubbed your clit with his thumb applying just enough pressure to make you moan, he smiled. "That feel good?"
You nodded, panting.
"Use your words." He said rubbing your clit a bit faster.
You moaned and tried to move away but his hand came to hold you down. "No, no."
You blushed, "Meanie."
He smirked kissing your belly before slipping a finger into you. You moan as your wall clenched around his digit, he moved it in and out slowly, thumb still working at your clit.
You gasped and bit your lip as he pushed another finger into you. He paused looking at you.
"What?" You tried to move for friction but he held you down.
"I want to hear you."
You blushed furiously, eyes wide.
Chan laughed lightly and started fingering you again, his middle and ring finger curling to find your g-spot.
You let out a loud cry and Chan smiled, he moved to kiss you, his tongue forcing its way into your mouth, he started grinding his palm into your clit as his fingers moved deeper. You moaned into the kiss and squealed, legs kicking slightly. Chan slid a third finger into you and you squirmed.
"It's too much!" You whined.
"I think you can take it." He said kissing your neck, "Just a little bit more, princess, wanna feel you cum on my hand."
You moaned louder as he pinched your nipple, sucking on the other one. You gasped as he started grinding his tented crotch against your thigh.
"Are you going to cum for me?" he cooed into your ear. "Cum for me, please, princess."
You moaned loudly as you came hard on Chan's hand.
He hummed and lifted his fingers to his mouth, licking them clean before leaning to kiss you. "You taste good babygirl." He stood to remove his pants letting them fall to the floor.
You moaned at the lewdness of the action as Chan moved between your legs, tapping his cock against your clit.
"I'm gonna make you feel good, make you mine." He said, his voice thick with lust.
You bit your lip and nodded. "Please. "
Chan smiled kissing you gently as he pushed into you.
A throaty moan erupted from your throat and Chan groaned. "Sound so pretty," He pulled out slowly and pushed in deeply, you cried out at the slight burn. "I'm sorry baby," He kissed your cheeks gently. "Can I move now?"
You nod and before you could ground yourself Chan was pistoning into you, fucking you as if he wouldn't get to again. You held onto him tightly, clawing at his broad shoulders. He moaned and squeezed your hips tightly. "You're so tight princess."
He moaned softly against your neck, kissing and biting, leaving marks that would surely become hickeys by morning, as he rutted into you over and over. You moaned louder, panting into the heated kisses he granted you. The bed creaked and slammed against the wall with the force of it all, the sound of sin slapping against skin filling your bedroom, you were positive the neighbors could hear but it wasn't like you had room to care.
Chan's hand slipped between your bodies and he began rubbing your clit. "C'mon baby. Cum for me again."
Your mouth fell open in a silent cry as he began thrusting into you harder, hitting your g-spot.
"Cum for me princess." He said through grit teeth.
Another thrust sent you toppling over the edge and you came hard, vision going white as you let out a broken cry. Chan followed quickly, his thick length throbbing inside you as you milked him for everything he had. He kept thrusting his gaze distant and glassy.
You whimpered and trembled as he overstimulated you slightly. After a few more thrusts he finally slowed down and relaxed on top of you.
"Let me take you out on a date..." He muttered against your shoulder.
"I'd like that." You said running your fingers through his curly hair.
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What da cringe ending 😭 I really want to thank everyone for 100 followers LOVE YALL <3 requests will reopen soon, I'm still busy with school but I hoped you liked this it took really long to make.
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jungshookz · 5 months
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smitten: y/n (reluctantly) agrees to go to jimin's big halloween bash and she forgot how much she actually hated parties
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➺ pairing; jeon jungkook x reader
➺ genre; smitten!miniseries!! bff!kook and smitten!y/n!! university!au!! honk honk humour!! the boohoo angsty wattpady fic of your dreams!! the pining and yearning is off the charts!! jimin’s still an asshole but what’s new!! 
➺ wordcount; 9.2k
➺ summary; putting on a smile while watching ji-eun cuddle up to jungkook is already hard enough, but when y/n is (reluctantly) invited to jimin’s massive halloween party, she can’t help but even more out of place. 
➺ what to expect; “you know, you’re my best friend and i wanna make sure that everything is… good between us.”
➺ currently playing on cee.fm; favourite crime [olivia rodrigo]
➺ smitten: part one [the almost confession]; part two [the incriminating note]; part three [the date]
»»————- 👻 ————-««
you’re pretty sure you’re in hell. 
you’re not sure what you did in your past life to have deserved this, but past-life y/n must’ve killed a baby or set an entire village on fire or something to that degree because you’re pretty sure that in this current timeline, you’re in hell 
you stay quiet as you munch on your (slightly soggy, unfortunately) sandwich, scrolling through your phone (but not really paying attention to your instagram feed because apparently you’re a glutton for punishment and you keep wanting to look up and just stare at jungkook and ji-eun in all their coupley glory) while your foot taps anxiously against the ground 
you know that if you say you can sit somewhere else to give the two of them some privacy that jungkook will insist that you stay, but you feel like the longer you sit here the faster the people around you will see that you’re just a big ol’ monster truck sized third wheel
you could lie and say that you have to go to the library to get some work done, but jungkook’s really good at knowing when you’re lying to him (apparently you have VERY obvious tells which you were very unaware of) so that’s not going to be a feasible plan either 
it’s just that being here is incredibly uncomfortable but it seems like the only option you have is to stay and sit through it — which, again, reiterates your point of you being pretty sure you’re being punished for something you did in your past life
“my handsome boy…” ji-eun giggles lightly, reaching over to adjust the collar of jungkook’s jacket before leaning over to kiss him on the cheek, “i like this jacket a lot.” 
“yeah?” he gives his girlfriend a boyish grin, looking down at his jacket before looking back up at her, “lucky for you, you can borrow it anytime you’d like-“ you glance up at them, the little voice in your brain stopping you from interrupting them to say that that is a nice jacket because you chose it for jungkook — and you feel like that comment could potentially lump you into the pick-me-girl-best-friend category which you’d very much like to avoid 
“borrow? no, i’m stealing it-“ 
“no way! i got this thrifted for, like, fifteen bucks, i’m not letting you steal it-“
“alright, then you better sleep with one eye open the next time i stay over at yours because this is a nice jacket-“ 
you can’t help but look over at the empty seat next to you on the bench as you let out a quiet sigh… you have never felt so horribly single in your entire life. 
and it doesn’t help that it’s cuffing szn this cuffing szn that all over your social media — your tiktok feed has not been very friendly to you as of late, the app flooded with countless videos of cute couples bundling up for the colder seasons
if anything you need to be cuffed to the wall before you go crazy and rip your eyelashes out from frustration 
unsurprisingly, jungkook and ji-eun are a couple now, but really, are you surprised? jungkook is great, ji-eun is great, they went on a great first date (thanks to you, let’s be honest) and all the dates after that went well too because it lead to jungkook asking ji-eun if she wanted to be exclusive with him 
you knew that things were going well when jungkook started hanging out with you less and less
and then when they officially got together, you didn’t think it could possibly get any worse but your already puny twice a week hangouts turned into two hours a week before he’d zip off to spend time with ji-eun
in fact, within the last two weeks, he’s only hung out with you once… which is fine, because you understand the honeymoon stage and you understand how giddy people can be when they get into a brand new relationship and just want to spend all their time with this new person 
you know for sure that if you were the one who’d gotten into a new relationship, you’d definitely want to spend as much time with your person because why wouldn’t you want to do that? you really can’t blame the guy 
you have other friends you can hang out with, but it’s just not as fun because even when you’re having a good time with them, your mind keeps wandering back to what jungkook is doing with ji-eun 
and of course, when jungkook mentioned to you over a quick lunch one afternoon that he was planning on asking ji-eun to make things official, it’s not like you could tell him that it was a horrible idea and that he shouldn’t be dating ji-eun without ruffling feathers and raising brows of suspicion 
the only person it would be a horrible idea for would be you, and you’re not enough of a dickhead to ruin a potentially good thing because of your own desires  
and obviously, she said yes because why wouldn’t she say yes?
you know, there really isn’t a way for you to talk about this situation without sounding like the most bitter person on the planet, so perhaps you should move on now  
“okay, i’m putting you two on drinks duty for the party!” jimin seems to appear out of thin air and you turn your head to look at him standing at the front of the table with an armful of flyers and the usual bossy, snarky persona that literally drains you every time you have an interaction with him, “unless you’re too busy making out to handle that.” 
“no, we can handle it-“ ji-eun rolls her eyes playfully, pulling away from jungkook before reaching over and plucking the list from jimin’s slim fingers, “jesus, jimin. twelve bottles of vodka??” 
“i’ll give you my credit card, just put all the charges on it-“ jimin shrugs, sliding in next to you before nudging you over a little, “this is going to be my greatest party yet. i’m charging $10 an admission and i’m renting out this huge house- i don’t think you can even comprehend how massive this party is going to be. it’s gonna be so much better than last year’s one.” 
“i remember hearing about your party last year!” you chime in, offering jimin a polite smile even though he’s not looking at you, “it sounded like it was super fun.” 
“so, you guys are on drinks, so that’s covered-“ jimin makes a tick on his clipboard before nodding to himself, “decor is covered, catering is covered, rent for the night is covered…” 
you poke your tongue against the inside of your cheek, slumping in your seat a little and resisting the urge to roll your eyes
you still have no clue what jimin’s problem is with you, but at this point you’ve gotten used to the way he acts like you literally do not exist at all 
you mentioned it to jungkook one time, wondering if maybe you were just looking too far into it and that there was nothing to take personally to which he responded with an enthusiastic nod and a “no, i also get the vibe that he doesn’t like you and i have no idea why… just let him be an ass if he wants to be one, don’t stoop to his level. life is too short to waste energy on weird people.” 
so if jimin wants to continue being an ass to you, you’re just gonna let it roll off you like water off a duck’s back 
“funny enough, y/n and i were gonna go to your party last year, but the kids in y/n’s building were trick or treating so we decided to stay home and watch horror movies and hand out candy instead-“ jungkook clears his throat, eyes flickering over to you for a brief second, “we also, like, decorated the doorway like it was a haunted apartment to freak the kids out. and y/n had this great idea to have a cauldron filled with warm spaghetti and she told the kids it was brain stew-“ 
“oh my god, i forgot about that-“ you snort, “i feel like we should’ve done, like, warm pudding instead or something, but the spaghetti kinda had the same effect and my kitchen smelled like an italian restaurant for two weeks after that-“ 
“let’s talk costumes!” jimin interrupts you, smacking his palm down on the table before pointing his pen at ji-eun and jungkook, “please don’t show up in anything tacky.” 
“we were thinking barbie and ken!” ji-eun grins, “not tacky, totally trendy — i know we probably won’t be the only barbie and kens in the room, but it’s just so trendy and i loved her pink sequinned cowboy outfit- or if that’s not available, i think the 80s skater costumes were a vibe-“ 
“i can’t whait to talk about horshes and capitahlism wiv a bunch of ovher kensj.” jungkook laughs lightly with a mouthful of sandwich, dabbing his mouth with his napkin before crumpling it up into a ball and tossing it at you
you scowl playfully when it bounces off your forehead and lands on the ground 
“you could go as allen, y/n. that’d be pretty funny.” jungkook swallows his bite, and you want to tell him that he doesn’t have to include you in every part of the conversation because you can practically see the pity for you radiating off of him in waves 
you know for a fact he feels bad that he’s not been able to hang out with you as much lately because every time you do hang out he always brings you a drink or a snack with sympathetic little puppy dog eyes
and every time you have lunch with him and ji-eun he’s always making an effort to include you in the conversation — especially when jimin is around because again, it’s pretty clear the guy doesn’t like you 
you and jungkook spent an entire afternoon trying to figure out why he didn’t like you so much, but you couldn’t come up with any conclusive results, so now whenever jimin is around, jungkook makes even more effort to include you in the conversation 
“allen was my favourite character, so that’s not even a bad idea.” you chirp, pulling out one of the flyers from jimin’s neat pile before looking at it for the details
“oh, right. yeah, you can come too, i guess.” jimin clears his throat quietly, taking the flyer back from you with a chuckle, “…you don’t seem like you’d have anything crazy going on on a friday night.”  
“i can come too? i thought that everyone was invited to this thing?” you raise an eyebrow, pointing to the little note on the flyer, “all it says is general admission.”
“…right.” jimin smiles sweetly at you, “and i suppose i’ll waive the fee for you since you’re… friends with jungkook.” 
“how sweet of you.” you respond curtly, offering a smile just as sweet before letting it drop as soon as he looks away
you are absolutely dreading having to go to this party. 
»»————- 👻 ————-««
“are you sure you don’t want us to come and pick you up? ji-eun has space in her car, you’d just have to sit in the back with all the drinks n stuff-“ 
“i’m good, jungkook, really-“ you mutter, pausing for a second to smudge out your lipstick before leaning back in your chair and turning side to side to look at your finished look 
not that this is jungkook’s fault, but the fact that the two of you really haven’t been hanging out as often gave you a lot of time to think about what you wanted to dress up as for jimin’s halloween costume, and after a solo spooky movie binge the other weekend, you decided that you wanted to dress up as emily from the corpse bride
sure, it’s been done so many times — but you love the movie and you love emily and you had so much time to get everything you needed for this costume so why not dress up as her?? 
you reach up to adjust your blue wig, tugging at it slightly to make sure it’s nice and secure 
“i’m just gonna uber there! plus, my place is kind of out of the way if you guys are already headed to jimin’s.” you clear your throat, “thank you for the offer though. make sure to let ji-eun know i really appreciate the gesture.” 
“okay, i will…” jungkook murmurs, and you can tell by the tone in his voice that he wants to say something but he’s holding himself back, “i guess i’ll see you at the party, then? we’ll probably be there in about forty minutes.” 
“yes, i’ll see you guys at the party.” you nod, wiping the leftover blue lipstick on your fingers on a tissue before reaching over to get ready to press the hangup button 
“y/n?” jungkook’s voice crackling out from your phone speaker makes you pause, and you pull your hand back 
“yea?” 
“we’re- we’re good, right?” the question is somewhat of a surprise to you due to its weirdly serious, non-jungkook nature, your eyes flickering down to look at the contact photo you have set for your friend
he grins like a maniac at the camera, eyes wide and lit up with excitement at the cheesy corn dog he’s holding in front of him 
the corner of your mouth twitches in a fond smile at the memory of that day — jungkook was convinced he’d be able to eat three corn dogs in one sitting and the day ended with him basically destroying your toilet and then refusing to let you use it until the smell cleared out 
“what do you mean?” you clear your throat quietly, lips parting to say something else before you press them together and decide against it
“i mean- i know we haven’t been hanging out a lot lately so i just-“ jungkook coughs, “you know, you’re my best friend and i wanna make sure that everything is… good between us.” 
“i-“ you pause again, gaze averting to the side as you think about his comment 
if you’re being completely honest, you don’t think everything is good between the two of you — the first reason why being the fact that you are still completely and utterly head over heels in love with him, and the second reason being that he’s in a relationship with someone else and you’re really not sure how much more of this you can take before you go insane 
but this isn’t exactly something you can hash out over a crackly phone call, and you’re really not in the mood to potentially destroy two relationships at once 
you really don’t know what you’re going to do about this emotional mess, but what you do know is that you’re going to have to take it day by day until you’re eventually ready to face it head on — and tonight, your only job is to smile, enjoy being young, and have lots of fun at what you’re sure is going to be an amazing party despite it being hosted by someone who hates your guts for no reason 
“we’re- we’re good, kook.” you manage to push out, despite the words practically fighting their way out of your mouth, “you’re my best friend, too.” 
“okay. so i’ll see you soon?” 
“yea.” you look at yourself in the vanity mirror, wondering if the sadness in your eyes will make your costume that much more believable, “i’ll see you soon.” 
»»————- 👻 ————-«« 
the six pack of lime seltzer water (you got the fancy kinds in glass bottles) clinks in their cardboard carrier as you walk on the sidewalk, blue heels clicking against the pavement as you follow the path leading up towards the house that-
“holy shit.” your jaw drops at the sheer size of this literal mansion — what looks to be an endless number of burgundy bricks separated by neat, thin layers of cement that are stacked on top of each other, two large, white columns that cast identical shadows on the curved sidewalk leading up to the large, black front door, and not to mention, the insane halloween decorations: huge spider webs stretched over the door and windows, fairy lights wrapped around the columns, a stack of pumpkins sitting by the front steps kardashian-style 
you don’t like jimin but you have to hand it to him, he sure can throw a party 
“s’cuse us, sorry!” a trio of girls dressed up as sluttier versions of the powerpuff girls brush past you, bubbles turning around to shoot you a grin, “love your costume, by the way!”
“oh, thank you!” your face immediately breaks into a wide grin, “you guys look great, too-“ 
the random compliment lifts your mood up slightly — you know you’re more than capable of making friends anywhere you go, so if jungkook is too busy mingling with the other couples, you know you’ll be fine 
and hopefully jimin will be too busy playing host to give you any attitude tonight 
you lift your dress up as you make your way up the steps, the corners of your mouth lifting in an excited smile when you see taehyung standing by the door greeting people and collecting their $10 by… having them tuck the bills into the waistband of his boxers
“magic mike?” you laugh, taehyung’s right eye dropping in a wink before thrusts his hips towards you 
“you know it, baby-“ he coos, reaching over to pinch the fabric of your dress to pull you towards him, your cheeks flushing when you stumble into his chest, “be nice to me and i’ll give you a lil lap dance in one of the private rooms-“ 
“taehyung, i swear to god, do not let any of those bills fall into your boxers because i’m not touching anything that touched your penis-“ jimin pops up behind taehyung dressed in a veryaccurate joker costume, his usual blonde hair dyed completely green for the look 
“hi, welcome to the party, $10 an admiss-“ the sweet smile immediately drops from his face when he realises it’s you, jimin leaning back slightly, “wow, corpse bride!” jimin nods, looking you up and down, “seems fitting.” he mutters under his breath, watching as taehyung tapes the neon orange bracelet around your wrist 
“nice to see you too, jimin.” you raise an eyebrow, lifting the six pack up with your other hand, “i didn’t want to come empty-handed, so i brought some drinks!”
“you brought six drinks for a house party? six sparkly waters, too… interesting.” jimin scoffs lightly, plucking the carrier from you before offering you a saccharine sweet smile, “how thoughtful of you. drinks are in the kitchen - first two shots are free, and then it’s $15 a shot after that. cocktails are $5 each, mocktails are $3- you seem like a shirley temple girl anyway- and all of it can be paid through venmo. the bartender will answer any other questions you have. bathrooms are upstairs, and the results to the costume competition will be announced at the end of the night. there are fifteen winners, and the votes are made by everyone here, so you might have a shot at winning something here.” jimin steps aside, gesturing towards the party, “have fun!”
“thank you, jimin.” you smile politely, stepping into the house and immediately rolling your eyes as soon as you turn away from him
so you weren’t able to completely avoid his dickheadedness, but hopefully that’ll be your only interaction with him tonight considering he’s probably going to be busy playing businessman all night 
$15 a shot is kind of insane, though 
you keep your phone pressed flush to your chest as you manoeuvre your way through the packed floor, the neon lights flashing and disco ball glimmering from above making it damn near impossible to navigate this place without bumping into backs and stepping on toes  
the DJ pumps his arm up into the air as he continues spinning his fingers against the discs, the crowd going wild as the song builds up to the chorus 
you can already tell that most of the people here are drunk (you can smell it, too) and you know, if you can’t beat ‘em, why not join them? 
you can find jungkook later, and alcohol is definitely going to make this night a little easier to handle 
“hi!” you smack your hands down on the marble countertop when you finally make your way to the bar, the vampire bartender turning to glance at you over his shoulder before tossing a cloth over his shoulder, “i want- something. shots, a drink, anything-“ your voice is already straining from the way you’re basically screaming over the music but this seems to be the proper way to communicate at a party like this 
“wait, y/n?” your eyes light up when you realise that it’s none other than namjoon in charge of the drinks (and you wonder if your friendship with him will mean he gives you more drinks without charging you for it) and you let out a gasp as you lean over the counter to grasp onto his wrist
“namjoon!” you grin, “oh my god, thank god, finally someone i know at this damn party. why didn’t you tell me you were going to be here??”
“why didn’t you tell me you were gonna be here?! i haven’t seen you at the library at all, otherwise i definitely would’ve talked to you about it- what can i get for you?” 
“top-shelf tequila, baby. i saw the list of brands that jimin bought - i want the most expensive one.” you raise an eyebrow, namjoon laughing to himself before nodding 
“alright, i gotcha- you need any chasers with that?” 
“you got cranberry juice?” 
“for you, i’ve got anything-“ namjoon smirks, holding a finger up to excuse himself  
it’s five seconds later that you’re presented with not one, not two, but three shots of tequila, namjoon winking at you as he slides the cranberry juice chasers over to you as well
“you better take these before jimin realises i’ve given you a freebie- i’m about to take a break here, someone else is gonna come in a sec to replace me- you wanna dance?” 
“um, of course i do!” you can’t help but squeal excitedly, “take one with me!” you push a shot glass towards him, namjoon shrugging before picking up the shot and downing it in less than two seconds
you take your second shot, eyes squinting as the burn of alcohol trickles down your throat 
you immediately shudder, reaching for the cranberry juice and tossing it down the hatch 
“oh, jesus-“ you hiss, shuddering against before sticking your tongue out in disgust, “god, that cranberry juice does not help whatsoever-!” you don’t get much of a chance to say anything else before namjoon has his slender fingers wrapped around your wrist, giggles bubbling out of your mouth as he drags you towards the crowded dance floor to join the rest of the drunken crowd 
»»————- 👻 ————-«« 
okay, so maybe this party didn’t turn out to be as bad as you thought it was going to be! 
“that- oh my god-!” you throw your head back in laughter when namjoon pulls out the worst dance moves you’ve ever seen, your eyes pinching shut as you clutch at your stomach 
you’re not sure how much time has passed (to be fair, it’s gonna be hard to tell how much time has passed when you’re at a massive house party with flashing lights and nothing but the sound of speakers booming to guide you) but you know you’ve been having a lot more fun with namjoon than you’ve had with jungkook these last few weeks) ((in fact you’re having so much fun that you almost forgot you were supposed to be heartbroken that the love of your life is with someone else, but also, that could probably be the alcohol taking over)) 
you know at some point you’re going to have to go over and say hi to jungkook eventually because you don’t want him to think that you’re purposely ignoring him or something — after all, it’s not his fault that he likes ji-eun and it’s not something you can pin on him and grill him for — but for now, you’re going to dance a little more, sing a little more, and- 
“i gotta pee!” you gasp all of a sudden, realising that you haven’t peed once since coming here and there’s a lot of tequila sloshing around in your system
“what?” namjoon furrows his brows, reaching up to tap against his ear, “too loud, can’t hear you!” 
“i gotta go pee!” you repeat yourself, pointing towards the staircase leading upstairs, “’m gonna go pee n then ‘m gonna come right back-“ 
“oh, pee?” namjoon nods, finally catching your words before stepping aside a little, “okay, i’ll be right here!” 
»»————- 👻 ————-«« 
the silence of the bathroom is more than welcome as soon as you step in and flick the lights on, not at all surprised to see a pair of elegant looking wall sconces lighting up the space 
you squint your eyes as you lean into the mirror, double checking that your makeup is still somewhat intact and you don’t look insane 
“hm. not bad.” you mutter to yourself, turning your head from side to side before nodding, reaching down to pull the endless amounts of tulle up so you can hopefully not piss all over yourself in your tipsy state 
you set the lid down as the toilet flushes, turning the tap on and rinsing your hands underneath the cool water 
“oh, damn-“ you wince when you realise you’re washing some of the blue body paint away and you quickly turn the tap off, shaking the water off your hands before reaching for a neatly folded cotton towelette of course, because regular paper towels aren’t fancy enough for a park jimin party 
you give yourself one last glance in the mirror (you could use a little more lipstick but it’s dark down there so no one’s going to be able to tell anyway) before flicking the lights off 
“oops! i’m sorry-“ you apologise instinctively when you open the door and stumble right into someone, taking a few steps back before looking up to see that it’s jimin, “oh, hey…” you clear your throat quietly, standing up a little straighter before offering him a meek smile 
you always feel like you’re in trouble when you’re around jimin and it’s the worst feeling in the world 
like he’s the principal and you just got caught cheating on a test and he’s about to call home to tell your parents as punishment 
or he’s an officer and he’s about to test you with the breathalyser and you know you’re going to fail because you definitely can’t walk in a straight line right now 
“why am i not surprised that you clearly don’t know how to handle alcohol?” jimin snorts, holding his hands out in case you fall over, “you better not throw up all over me, this suit is custom made-“
“i wasn’t throwing up in the bathroom, i just went in there to pee-“ you roll your eyes, placing both hands on your hips before shaking your head, “you are ridiculous, you know that? even if i was throwing up in your stupid fancy toilets, the normal thing to do would be to ask if me i was okay and if i needed some water! you- you are just so self-centred and just-“
“yeah, uh-huh-“ jimin reaches up to pat the side of your face with a smile, “by the way, if you were looking for jungkook, he’s at the VIP booth with ji-eun and the rest of us.”
“oh, perfect!” you nod, thankful for the information, “i’ll pop over and say hi in a bit, i think it’d be good to sit down too because my heels are kind of killing me and i wouldn’t be surprised if i had, like, a million blisters right now-“ 
“woah, i never said you were allowed to be in the booth with us.” jimin scoffs, pressing a hand against your shoulder to keep you from moving, “silly girl.” 
your lips part slightly as you look at him, and for a moment the only thing that can be heard is the faint boom and bass of the music playing from downstairs 
“are you… serious?” you ask, unsure if jimin’s joking with you or not
the bored expression on his face tells you that he is indeed, super serious 
all of this just feels so incredibly cliquey and immature and stupid and you know that you’re supposed to be the bigger person because jimin clearly won’t be and you like to think that you’re ten times more emotionally mature than him but he’s making it harder and harder for you to not want to shred up his nice suit with a pair of scissors and cuss him out in front of everyone 
“i’m dead serious. i’m just telling you this so that you don’t embarrass yourself when your drunk ass stumbles over and tries to join us.” jimin says as if it’s the most obvious thing in the entire world, “enjoy the rest of the party, sweetheart.” he brushes past you to head into the washroom and-
“you’re a fucking dickhead, you know that?” you snap, jimin stopping in his tracks before turning his head slightly so you can just make out the side of his face, “i think i’ve been nothing but nice to you ever since i met you, and to be honest, i can’t even think of one reason why you are constantly so fucking rude and overall just unpleasant to me. i don’t say anything when you purposely cut me out of the conversation, i don’t nag when you ignore my questions and comments but respond to everyone else’s, and most importantly, i’ve never called you out for being a jackass when i think i’ve had every chance and opportunity to. if you have a problem with me, then just say so so that we can hash this stupid weird rivalry out and just get along. your best friend and my best friend are in a relationship, and i think it’s in everyone’s best interest that we at least try to get along-“
“oh, shut the fuck up, y/n.” jimin scoffs, turning around to face you, “you know, you always act like you’re better than everyone else, that’s why i don’t like you.”
you feel your shoulders stiffen at the comment before you shrug, crossing your arms over your chest, “well, i’m sorry if i’ve given you that impression but that’s not my intention, i don’t think i’m better than you, i don’t think i’m better than everyone else, and i can’t control how you feel about me but-“ 
“oh my god, even when you’re confronting me about being a dickhead to you you’re still being a sensible goddamn person, it’s like you’re purposely trying to piss me off-“ 
“okay, well, i’m not going to apologise to you for literally being myself because there’s nothing i can do about it. this is a you problem, not a me problem, so if you insist on being such an unreasonable drama queen for however long we’re going to have to spend time together, then i think the solution here is just for you to ignore me — which, you’re already doing a stellar job of, congratulations — and in return, i’ll happily ignore you.”
“i hate when people aren’t themselves. i pick up on that shit right away, and i gotta tell you, y/n, you might be the fakest person of them all.”
“what the hell are you talking about?” 
“i think we both know you’re hiding something from all of us. i think you’re hiding something from yourself, too. i think you’re lying to yourself.” 
there’s a pregnant pause in the conversation and for a second you want to ask him what exactly he’s implying here, but… 
“alright, jimin, well-“ you turn around to head towards the stairs, “you’re fuckin’ being weird, and i’m just trying to have a good time, so i’m just gonna go back down-“ 
“yeah, have a wonderful rest of your evening, corpse bride-“ 
you resist the very strong urge to whip around and literally just strangle the man, but you remind yourself that before you had this little interaction you were actually having a very good time 
“y/n!” jungkook stands at the bottom of the staircase as you make your way down, being careful not to trip over your heels, “hi!” 
“jungkook! oh, there you are- i was wondering where you were-“ you loop an arm with his as you drag him through the hoards of people and towards the bar (you really need a drink and it looks like namjoon is back on the clock)
“there you are!” he laughs lightly, reaching over to tap your hand gently, “i’ve been texting you all night trying to figure out where you were but- is your phone on do not disturb or something?“
“no, it’s not! i’m sorry, i should’ve checked my phone-“ you smile sheepishly, “i’ve been dancing with namjoon this whole time but- where are you guys sitting?”
“i don’t know, some area that jimin squared off for us and a few others- ji-eun’s been asking about you, she wanted to say hi-“ 
“oh! oh my god, yeah, i should probably go say hi to ji-eun-“ you gesture for namjoon to get you some water and he nods, grabbing a cup and filling it up for you, :your ken costume turned out great, by the way-“ you laugh, patting jungkook’s bare chest, “it’s, uh- it’s really giving horses and the patriarchy.”
“thank you, thank you- and your costume turned out so cool too, we should watch corpse bride again when we eventually have another movie night-“ 
“sure! sure, for sure.” you clear your throat quietly, a moment of awkward silence settling in between the two of you 
your friendship feels so… different now 
like there’s this unspoken air of something in between you and jungkook like an invisible brick wall 
and maybe it’s the liquid courage currently sloshing around in your body and the leftover exhilaration from finally calling jimin out on his bullshit, but now you have the urge to talk to jungkook about the weird tension 
“hey, kook, listen-“ you reach up to scratch the back of your neck, “there’s something i’ve been meaning to tell you but i’ve definitely been putting off for a while…” 
all of a sudden, a drum roll begins to boom from the speakers, the spotlights darting around the crowd before shining towards the main stage at the front of the room, whoops and cheers bouncing off the walls as jimin waltzes his way towards the microphone, a cocky smirk on his face as he raises his hand to get people to quiet down 
“oh, shit, the costume competition results!!” jungkook nudges your side as the two of you turn to face the front, “we can talk about it later, i wanna see who won what- i voted myself for best ken costume, so-“ 
you let out a breath you didn’t even know you were holding and you nod, thankful for the interruption 
maybe it’s a good thing you were interrupted 
telling him in the middle of a party probably wasn’t the best idea, anyway
»»————- 👻 ————-«« 
once again, you really have to hand in to jimin 
the man truly knows how to throw a party, because it seems like just about everyone is having the time of their lives — and this costume competition just made things so much more fun
there are definitely a lot of good costumes here tonight and jimin decided to change it up with twenty-five different categories to go through so he’s kind of speed running through the names 
most scary costume, most realistic costume, most well-made costume: he’s got a lot of categories to get through 
you keep a content smile on your face as the costume contest continues to go on, enjoying jimin’s commentary to the point that you nearly forget that the two of you hate each other and he totally just disrespected you like he’s never disrespected you before twenty minutes ago 
“i wonder how that guy made it look like his head was floating… that shit was so cool.” jungkook claps his hands along with the crowd and you nod enthusiastically
“i know, right?! i’m sure he probably took it off tiktok or something - we can definitely look it up after the party and maybe we can try to recreate-“ you stop yourself mid-sentence, suddenly remembering that you guys haven’t exactly been the closest as of late so it feels weird to be offering to do something together, “um-“ you clear your throat, offering a half-hearted shrug, “yeah, we can, like, look it up later or something. maybe you and ji-eun can figure it out and let me know.” 
“yeah! or- you know, you and me-“ jungkook licks over his chapped lips, “like- you know, like- old times or whatever-“
“yeah, yeah- maybe! maybe-“ 
“now, before i announce this special category, i have something to read because-“ jimin sucks in a breath through his teeth before cocking his head to the side, “well, let’s just say it’s some context for the best simp costume of the night.”
you can’t help but frown at the strange category — out of all the halloween costume competitions you’ve been to, “best simp” has certainly never been one that you’ve seen before 
“just wanna remind everyone that this is just a costume competition, everything is based off the costume you’re wearing.” jimin adds, taking a slip of paper out of his back pocket before unfolding it with nimble fingers, “so, uh- you know. don’t take anything seriously, you know? just gotta loosen up and have fun.” 
your brows dip slightly at the weird disclaimer 
something about this doesn’t feel right.  
“dear j, this is something that i’ve wanted to tell you for a while but have never had the courage to until now. throughout our entire friendship, you’ve been so kind and loyal and honest with me, and i think that you deserve the same, so this is me being honest with you.” jimin speaks into the microphone, reading the words off the slip of paper with a tone of amusement laced in his powder-soft voice, “to be honest, i’ve liked you for nearly a year now, and i’ve tried so many times to push those feelings down but it’s clear that my feelings aren’t going anywhere anytime soon…” he recites, a smirk twitching at the corner of his mouth as he puts the piece of paper down, “any thoughts on who the winner could be? or should i keep going?” 
your eyelids flutter slightly at the weird change in mood of the lines and a strange feeling of familiarity of those words
“me at that one hot english professor.” a voice pipes out from the crowd and that gets a round of laughter 
you laugh along politely, but you can’t help but feel as though something is off 
something is off
something is very, very off
“i cherish you as a friend and the last thing i want to do is to make things weird, so… you don’t have to worry about my feelings, you know?” 
oh my god. 
you feel the blood immediately drain from your face when you finally realize why these lines are so familiar — it’s because they’re from the note you wrote for jungkook when you were going to tell him you liked him. 
your brain begins to work overtime to figure out how the hell jimin got his hands on that note and why the hell he’d think it’d be okay to read it aloud to this massive group of people and what the hell he’s even doing right now  
“what i’m trying to say is that i like you, j. i like you so much that i don’t know where to even put my feelings, and i’m sick of holding my feelings back and pretending that i’m fine with being just your friend.” 
you know that jimin’s never really been a fan of you, but even this seems like too much of a dickhead move even for him 
you pluck at the cuff of your sleeve anxiously, tracing your steps all the way back to the day you were going to tell jungkook about your feelings for him and the note that you’d accidentally given him that you were hoping was rotting away somewhere in a dump yard but clearly isn’t 
jungkook said he’d given ji-eun the note to spit her gum out into 
but what if she uncrumpled the paper and saw the note?
and what if jimin was there when she uncrumpled the note? 
and then they read it together and ji-eun mentioned that you were reciting this aloud in the bathroom and-
your heart starts to race in your chest and you feel the hairs prickle on your arms as anxiety begins to bubble in your stomach, and you know that no one’s looking at you but you feel like everyone’s looking at you 
you feel sick
you feel like you’re going to throw up and explode at the same time 
“how could you like someone for a year and not tell ‘em?” jungkook snorts, nudging you with his elbow, “who do you think the poor sucker is who said that?” 
“beats me.” you breathe out, feeling yourself shrink slightly when you notice jimin starting to scan the audience, clearly laser-focused on finding you, “i have to- um, i think i need some fresh air, it’s a little warm in here-“ 
“oh- okay-“ jungkook doesn’t get the chance to say much else before you’re turning around, pushing yourself through the crowd of people and trying your best to stay calm 
just breathe
in and out
in and out 
in and out in and out in and out oh my god HURRY UP MOVE MOVE MOVE-
you’re sure that no one will notice if you slink out through the back
and you can always text namjoon later and say that it was great spending time with him but you had a personal emergency and needed to leave the party earlier 
and if jimin decides to expose you, at least you’ll be gone and out of this house and nowhere near any of these people and you don’t have to look at their stupid sympathetic faces and you don’t have to deal with- 
“and the best simp of the night goes to our lovely corpse bride.” 
you freeze when the spotlight lands on you, your heart going a hundred miles a minute as it starts to beat harder and faster in your chest 
you only manage to turn your head weakly to glance over your right shoulder, catching jimin in your peripheral view before you’re slowly twisting around to face him, feet glued to the ground 
“why don’t you come up here and accept your sash, corpse bride?” jimin smirks, plucking the satin sash from (a shocked looking) taehyung’s arms before raising it up in the air slightly, “congratulations on winning, you get two free drinks from the bar. one for you and one for… well, probably also you. get on up here and claim your coupons!” 
you feel your face burning bright red in humiliation and you’re unable to tear your eyes away from jimin, your hands clenched into tight fists at your sides
this is a nightmare
this is actually a nightmare 
this is traumatising in so many ways 
the music seems to quiet down, a loud silence washing over the room as people look at you with expressions of confusion on their faces, everyone clearly a little thrown off at the weird category 
eyes, there are just a million pairs of eyes on you and you feel like you can’t move or breathe or even do anything but stand still in shock
it’s only then that you notice the calculating look on jungkook’s face, his eyelids fluttering slightly before his eyes widen and his head snaps up and over to look at you
his lips part slightly as his eyes dart over the features of your face and you feel your entire body flushing in humiliation and shame, forcing your eyes away from your friend and back to the dickhead on the stage 
“you are really something else, park jimin.” you manage to mutter out before turning on your heel and pushing your way through the crowd, people stepping aside to let you out 
“aw, where are you going? you had a great costume, that’s all we were trying to say!” jimin laughs, actually laughs into the microphone before shrugging, tossing the sash over his shoulder before moving on, “alright, well, more drinks for me, i guess. the next category is best couple’s costume-“ 
“y/n- y/n, wait!” jungkook’s voice is the one thing you hear among the music and bustle of the crowd but he’s the last person you want to talk to right now so you pick up your pace upon spotting the front door 
tears blur your vision as you finally burst out into the open air, your chin trembling as you try your best to keep your composure and not completely burst into tears
“oh my god, oh my fucking god-“ you whimper, sucking in large breaths of air 
run, run, run, the only instinct you have is to run, and you reach down to yank both heels off before taking off into a sprint, the grass slightly damp beneath your bare feet 
it feels very cliché to be running out of a mansion in a big poofy dress, but you can’t even take the moment to laugh at yourself because the only thing you can focus on is the fact that everything has changed completely and you’re forced to face reality a lot sooner than you would’ve liked 
“y/n, come on!” you turn to glance over your shoulder to see jungkook hot on your trail, “you can’t just run away from a discussion you don’t want to have, we need to talk because we both know that things have been off since i started dating ji-eun and now-“ 
“okay, well, now you know, then!” your chest heaves as you come to a stop to catch your breath (you have no idea why you thought running would be a good idea, you get winded after thirty seconds on the treadmill), spinning around to face your friend who skids to a stop, tripping over his feet a little before standing up straight, “the secret’s out, jungkook. we finally solved the puzzle. i love you. i’ve loved you for so long that i don’t even remember when i started feeling this way, but all i know is i love you. you’re the first person i think of when i wake up and you’re the last person i think about before i fall asleep. i would literally drop everything i was doing if you needed me, and you’re the only person i want to spend my free time with.” all the words that you’ve been holding in for the last who knows how long finally spill out, your mouth running uncontrollably, “i love you so much that i helped you set up your date with ji-eun, i love you so much that i’m willing to run in the rain just to get you a teddy bear and a bouquet that’s not even going to me, jungkook, i-“ you blubber, reaching up to wipe at your eyes, “i don’t know what to do. there is no one else in the world i’d rather be with than you, jungkook, and i- to be honest, maybe it’s a good thing that jimin did what he did because you do deserve to know the truth and you do deserve to know how i really feel about you. if this didn’t happen i think i’d just keep it to myself for the rest of my life, but you deserve to know this. i love you, jungkook. i love you and i don’t know if i can keep being friends with you if you’re dating someone else because it’s actually killing me on the inside-“ 
“i love you, y/n,” jungkook breathes out, and you feel yourself letting out a breath that you didn’t even know you were holding
relief 
for the first time in a long time, you feel relieved, like a massive weight’s just been lifted off your shoulders 
you feel your heart soar in your chest, and suddenly it’s like all the humiliation and shame has completely washed away, and suddenly you have the feeling to run back into the house to thank jimin for doing this because you know you wouldn’t have said anything if it weren’t for this slightly traumatising experience 
“i love you, i do, but… not in that way.” his shoulders droop slightly and you feel your heart beginning to crackle like a delicate glass sculpture, each splinter creating more damage than the last, “i love you like you’re the first person i call when i get good news because i know you’ll be proud of me, or when i get bad news because i know you’ll be there to comfort me. i love you, like i envision you standing next to me at my wedding fixing my tie or calming me down when whoever i end up marrying is walking down the aisle. i love you like you’ll be fun auntie y/n who spoils my kids with shopping sprees at the mall and who allows them an extra scoop of ice cream after dinner. i love you because you make me a better person, i love you because you encourage me to be the best version of myself i can possibly be. i love you because you remind me to be smart and kind and humble and honest and i trust you to be the one to put me in my place if i ever need it but i-“
“stop.” you feel nauseated hearing all of these words coming out of his mouth, telling you that he loves you because and he loves you because but not just i love you too. “just stop, jungkook.” you know that you can’t control someone else’s feelings but you can control your own reactions, and if jungkook would’ve kept rattling on you don’t know what you would’ve said but you know you probably would’ve lashed out at him 
and it’s good that you finally got your answer, right? he loves you, but not in that way — not in the way that you love him 
“y/n, please-“ jungkook whispers, reaching out for you, his eyebrows scrunching together when you take a small step back, wrapping your arms around yourself, “please, i can’t lose you as a friend, you mean so much to me-“ 
“i need some time.” you manage to force out, the sickening feeling of humiliation and shame and embarrassment and disappointment and frustration and anger swirling around in your stomach, “i just need some time.”
“how much time?” 
“you should probably go back to the party.” you clear your throat quietly, offering your friend a weak smile, “i heard you and ji-eun were up for best couple’s costume. not saying that jimin rigged the system or anything, but-“ 
“y/n, how much time?” jungkook’s looking at you with sad puppy-dog eyes, and though it breaks your heart to see him like that, you need to put yourself first for once 
every instinct inside of you screams to console jungkook, to reassure him and let him now that you’ll still be around but you just need some space from him and the whole situation 
your eyes begin to water again as you press your lips together, shaking your head quietly, “i’m gonna go see if i can catch the bus home.” 
»»————- 👻 ————-«« 
(- “the FUCK is wrong with you, huh?!” jungkook barks, slamming jimin up against the wall before grabbing two fistfuls of his shirt, “you sadistic fuck, who in their right mind would ever fucking do that to another human being?!” 
“i’m the sadistic one?” jimin laughs, reaching up to wrap his fingers around jungkook’s wrists, “are you fucking serious? you’re the one whose been dangling yourself in front of y/n like a damn carrot to a starved rabbit-“ 
“what are you talking about?”
“you can’t stand here and honestly say that you didn’t have an inkling that y/n liked you more than a friend. i’ve seen the way you talk to her, i’ve seen the way you look at her, i’ve seen the way you are around her- you think i’m the evil one? at least i don’t take advantage of my friends who are CLEARLY head over heels in love with me and would obviously do anything i wanted them to do and ask them to help me set up a date that i’m taking someone else out on-“ 
“get a fucking life and mind your own damn business for once, you motherf-“) 
🎙️ console y/n or call out jimin because what the hell was that?! (talk to my characters!) 
📚 why not explore the rest of the library while you're here? (go say hi to yoongi and y/n in la vie en bonsai!) 
💫 or perhaps you want something shorter to read? (drabbles and mini series!)
🌟 or something even shorter? (teeny tidbits!) 
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teapartyprincess4two · 3 months
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‧꒰ა ☆ ໒꒱ ‧ MASTERLIST ‧꒰ა ☆ ໒꒱ ‧
☆click each individual name to access series☆
🧸fluff 🦢angst 💋smut 💌headcannons
🎀platonic fluff ✨AU 💃🏻Latina reader 💐sad
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‧꒰ა ☆ ໒꒱ ‧ Sturniolo Triplets ‧꒰ა ☆ ໒꒱ ‧
⭒ Big Sister- Sturniolo Triplets 🎀
summary: Reader is a couple of years older than the triplets, having lived a completely different life to theirs by the age of 25 and is invited onto the Cut The Camera Podcast as a special guest. Reader and triplets retell stories of their childhood and learn more about the readers past.
⭒ Big Sister Pt. 2- Sturniolo Triplets 🎀,🦢
summary: After visiting the triplets in L.A, the reader returns back home and works with her brothers to plan another get together. This time the triplets visit her, taking a trip down to the Lone Star State.
⭒ Big Sister Pt. 3- Sturniolo Triplets 🎀
summary: Your brothers have always been overprotective of you, and they do a good job of showing it while filming with Sam and Colby.
☆N. Sturniolo☆ (click for series)
⭒ Truth or Dare- N. Sturniolo 🎀
summary: Nick and his best friend always find themselves playing truth or dare.
⭒ 4 In The Morning- N. Sturniolo 🦢,🎀
summary: Your best friend Nick comforts you after receiving some unexpected news.
⭒ Talkative- N. Sturniolo 💌,🎀
summary: head cannons of Nick with a yapper bff!
☆M. Sturniolo☆ (click for series)
⭒ Full Set- M. Sturniolo 🧸
summary: Reader is a well renowned nail tech in L.A and due to her growing popularity has become everyone’s go-to nail tech. This leads her to become a workaholic, stunting many of the areas of her life. Three regular customers work towards changing that.
⭒ In Denial- M. Sturniolo 🦢,🧸
summary: It’s hard to admit when you’re in love, especially when the person you love is so different from you. But, as they say, opposites attract.
⭒ Small Town Dreaming- M. Sturniolo 🧸
summary: There’s not much to do in this small town but fall in love.
⭒ Heartbreak Girl- M. Sturniolo 🦢
summary: Matt’s in love with you, but you’re too in love with someone else to realize it.
⭒ Heartbreak Girl PT.2- M. Sturniolo 🦢,🧸
summary: Matt tries moving on, but you reel him back in every time.
⭒ Manage- M. Sturniolo 💋
summary: You’re Matt’s secretary, in charge of overseeing everything related to his schedule. Everyday when you come into the office he suppresses the urge to take you then and there. When on a work business trip, he can’t hold back anymore.
⭒ I’ll Play Your Game- M. Sturniolo 🦢,🧸
summary: You’re the Pastor’s daughter, all eyes are always on you. So, why not put on a show?
⭒ Intrusive Thoughts- M. Sturniolo 💋
summary: You’re forced to sit on Matt’s lap during a long roadtrip and once you arrive at your destination he lets his intrusive thoughts win.
⭒ Intrusive Thoughts PT.2- M. Sturniolo💋
summary: The morning after yours and Matt’s night together, you go for round two.
⭒ Carnal Desires- M. Sturniolo💋
summary: You join Matt and his family on a vacation, and get lost together while on a hike. Instead of freaking out, you two take advantage of the sudden alone time.
⭒ Talkative- M. Sturniolo 💌, 🧸,💋
summary: head cannons of Matt with a talkative, yapper girlfriend!
⭒ A Cold Sunday- M. Sturniolo🧸
summary: You and Matt spend a cold Sunday morning together, snuggling up and keeping warm.
⭒ Urban Cowboy- M. Sturniolo🧸
summary: Matt, a city boy, tries one upping you, the best bull rider in town, only to be met with a painful outcome.
⭒ Why Do You Care?- M. Sturniolo 🦢,🧸
summary: You’re naive and let yourself be led on by someone you believe has good intentions, but one day Matt puts him in his place and ends up confessing his feelings to you in the process.
⭒ Parenthood- M. Sturniolo 💌,🧸,💋
summary: head cannons of dad!Matt.
⭒ Lipstick- M. Sturniolo💃🏻,🧸,💋
summary: Matt’s nervous to meet your family, but after making a good impression you treat him to a night full of kisses and lipstick stains.
⭒ Happy Birthday- M. Sturniolo 💐,🧸
summary: Over the course of working together for years, Matt picks up on everything and despite not understanding it completely, he comforts you through the hurt.
⭒ Tough- M. Sturniolo 💌,🧸,💋
summary: head cannons of Matt with a tough girlfriend!
⭒ Weakness- M. Sturniolo 💋
summary: You fight your inner desires, but ultimately let your weakness consume you.
⭒ Actress- M. Sturniolo 💌,🧸,💋
summary: head cannons of Matt with an actress girlfriend!
⭒ Affectionate- M. Sturniolo💌,🧸,💋
summary: head cannons of Matt being affection with his touch starved girlfriend!
☆C. Sturniolo☆ (click for series)
⭒ Corner Store- C. Sturniolo 🧸
summary: Reader works at a shitty corner store in order to make some money to help her out with school. She really hates her job, but one night one coworker works hard to change that.
⭒ Way Over Love- C. Sturniolo 💋
summary: Rumors spread like wildfire, especially in this new digital era, so it’s best to keep everything a secret. After so many drunk calls and missed texts Chris is way over love. Or is he?
⭒ Shopaholic- C. Sturniolo 🧸
summary: No matter how hard you try, you just can’t stop swiping your card.
⭒ Unplanned- C. Sturniolo 🧸
summary: Becoming a teen mom was never in your plans, but you and Chris had to learn to make the best of it.
⭒ Candy- C. Sturniolo💃🏻,🧸
summary: You were sweet as candy and Chris couldn’t stop himself from taking a bite, leading to an internet scandal neither of you anticipated.
⭒ Talkative- C. Sturniolo 💌, 🧸,💋
summary: head cannons of Chris with a talkative, yapper girlfriend!
⭒ Parenthood- C. Sturniolo 💌, 🧸,💋
summary: head cannons of Dad!Chris.
‧꒰ა ☆ ໒꒱ ‧ Johnnie Guilbert ‧꒰ა ☆ ໒꒱ ‧
(click for series)
⭒ Collab- J. Guilbert 🧸
summary: You and Johnnie pretend to date, faking it for so long that it became real.
⭒ Vampire- J. Guilbert ✨, 🦢, 🧸
summary: You’re just a princess who fell in love. The only problem is that he’s a vampire and your father has promised your hand in marriage to someone else.
⭒ Bad Day- J. Guilbert 🦢,🧸
summary: Johnnie is the moon and you’re the sun, always bright, bubbly and energetic. Nobody believes that someone as positive as you can ever have a bad day, but when you do Johnnie is ready to comfort you through it.
⭒ Babygirl- J. Guilbert🧸
summary: You didn’t choose a life in the limelight, you were just famous by association, and now you’ve earned yourself the nickname “babygirl” by the entire internet.
⭒ Monster- J. Guilbert 💋
summary: Tara plays matchmaker, earning Johnnie the night of his life with you in a bar restroom.
‧꒰ა ☆ ໒꒱ ‧Jake Webber ‧꒰ა ☆ ໒꒱ ‧
(click for series)
⭒ Messy- J. Webber 💋
summary: Jake is a regular customer at the diner you work at, eating the same meal everyday before returning back to work. One day, when you’re taking his order, you can tell he has much more sinful intentions than a quick meal.
‧꒰ა ☆ ໒꒱ ‧5SOS‧꒰ა ☆ ໒꒱ ‧
☆ C. Hood
⭒ coming soon…
☆ A. Irwin
⭒ coming soon…
☆ L. Hemmings
⭒ coming soon…
☆ M. Clifford
⭒ coming soon…
‧꒰ა ☆ ໒꒱ ‧Lip Gallagher‧꒰ა ☆ ໒꒱ ‧
⭒ coming soon…
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curvykittyyssmutfics · 4 months
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pervyroomate!Satoru who can't believe his luck when you answer his online ad for a roomate: "What made you seek out a male roommate, honey? Ain't cha scared the big bad wolf is gonna get ya in your sleep?" You scoff with a heavy eye roll. "Fuck no." He can't stop the smile slowly forming on his pretty face. 'Ya should be.' He thinks, already imagining how'd look naked and squirming beneath him as he made you cry on his cock.
pervyroomate!Satoru that despite his amazing mouth-watering muscles, he mostly watched as you move your belongings into his spacious 2 bd apt: "What the fuck, Gojo? You specifically demanded I not hire movers as you're 'stronger than any of those limp dick fuckers.'" You can't see how he leans against the wall amused, arms crossed and intently staring at the way your small cotton shorts gets lost between your plump brown ass cheeks as you struggle takin boxes to your new bedroom. "Sorry, the views just so damn spectacular. Lookin so fuckin good, baby." Your cheeks warm in embarrasment as you abandon the heavy box, rush into the room and slam the door. Satoru only chuckles, fixin his raging boner as he heads downstairs to get the rest of your stuff.
pervyroomate!Satoru does anything he can in the upcoming weeks to rile you up by any means: "Gojo, put on some goddamn clothes for christ sake. My girls are gone be here soon and none of em wanna see that fuckin shit." You grumble as you sit on the couch and turn on the Netflix app. He laughs heartily, dramatically ploppin down next to you. Its impossible not to notice how his naked chest ripples, how low his black briefs sit on his hips. His hypnotic ocean blue eyes linger on your thick cocoa thighs before meeting your gaze. "Fabrications. Your BFF cornered me in our kitchen just the other day.. Damn near begged me to dick her down. Wanted so bad to tell her I'm savin that for you." He leans in close to your stunned face to whisper his last sentence and gets up, heading to his bedroom. Your left starin at his spot on the couch with wide eyes and wet panties.
pervyroomate!Satoru purposely switched out the dark shower curtain a few months into you moving in with a clear one, finding any reason to disturb your alone time: "Hey y/n, need to brush my teeth real fast." Doesn't bother knocking, quickly stepping in before you have time to cover your wet body. His eyes seem a shade darker as he scans up and down your soapy, naked frame. A small 'fuck' escaping his pretty lips as he stares unashamed. "Gojo, what the hell?!" You screech, arms quickly covering your glistening breasts as you cup your other hand over your pussy. You could literally melt on the spot at the way she clenches at his intense gaze. "Get the fuck out!" The damn pervert looks on for a moment longer, actually having the audacity to palm his cock a few times. "Okay okay, baby, damn. Why you gotta be like that? You showed me yours, don't you want me to show you mine?" He asks with pouty lips as he finally backs out the bathroom, arms raised in surrender. You stop shielding your tits to throw a bar of dove soap at his stark white locks. He only chuckles, quickly shutting the door to avoid impact. "Fuckin creep, Gojo!!"
pervyroomate!Satoru flirts with you relentlessly, crossing every boundary and every line over the next few months: "You gettin the snacks, babe?" Satoru calls from the front room. You roll your eyes at the pet name before you feel a stinging SMACK! to your plump behind. "Ow, Gojo! You fuckin asshole. Quit it!" You swat at the childish nuisance but he dodges your attack easily, leaning against the kitchen counter a few feet away. Fuckin guy has spent the better part of the day smackin your ass while yelling 'Smack Ass Friday!' like a damn teenager. "Awe, come on pretty! Love watchin how your ass bounces when I do it." He coos at you before swerving a bag of doritos you quickly chuck his way. "Boy, I don't give a fuck. You touch it again and you're goin down." It's insulting how lightly he takes your threat; walking right up, grabbin a handful of each ass cheek and smashing your hips together. His half hard dick feels chubby as fuck against you, girth of him makin you gasp and clutch as his shoulders. Your insides clench at the feelin of him pressed against you. "Fuck, I been waitin to go down on you. Name the time and place sweetheart." He tells you sweetly, swiping his thumb across your bottom lip, kissing you on the cheek and retreating to the living room. Damn this man must love leaving you speechless, heart and pussy fluttering to his dirty words.
pervyroomate!Satoru notices how much you love how he smells: whether it's his natural scent or cologne. You take his shirts without his permission too often, only wantin the ones he'd previously worn. Loves how he comes home late one night and catches you in one of his stolen white t-shirts. Neckline pulled up to your nose, tittes jiggling wildly underneath as you play with yourself. He stares between the crack of your bedroom door, hand swiftly squeezin at his dick as he watches you mindlessly rub yourself over your underwear. y/e/c eyes shut tight, quietly moaning his name like a fuckin prayer. "Toruuuuu! Fuh-uuuck Satoru, love how you smell. Mmmm, soooo good. Want you so m-much, need you to fuck me Toru!" His mouth hangs wide open as he humps his hand faster atop his light blue jeans, absolutely entranced how you frantically rub at your throbbing lil pearl. "Ahhhh! Oh my god, Toru please!" He's so greatful for a front row seat to witness you cum like a fuckin virgin. Fuck are you one?Can't help his deranged whisper as he commits the scene to memory. "That's it, baby. Cum for me. Fuck.. I know that lil pussy's so gushy for me right now. Can't wait to see it up close, gonna make her cream all over me pretty girl." Head pushed back into your fluffy pink pillow, pretty y/h/c hair splayed out makin you look like a goddess in the throes of passion to him. "Wanna cum on your cock, Satoruuuu!" His shirt rides up on you, showing him how your tummy pudge jiggles as your body convulses into an arch. You bite your lip to muffle the rest of your pleasure. It's okay. The sight is enough for Satoru. He paints the inside of his new jeans immediately, free hand cupped over his mouth as his eyes roll back, his hips repeatedly jerking his clothed spasming cock into the palm of his hand.
pervyroomate!Satoru who asks you the nastiest shit just to see you sexually flustered: You're in bed reading, back against the headboard with Satoru's head in your lap. Your hand carelessly cards through his soft hair, nails lightly scratchin at his scalp. So cute the way he whines at you to continue everytime you accidentally pause as you get to a good part in your book. "Hey baby?" His voice so innocent that you know for a fact the next words outta his mouth are gonna be filthy as fuck. "Yeah?" "How come you only call me Satoru when you're on your back, fingers in that pretty lil pussy?" His tone is laced with the genuine wonder of a child asking a simple question. Your jaw might as well be on the floor. "G-Gojo!" Shocked exclamation half accusatory, half scolding. "What? I really wanna know, y/n. Sound as pretty as you looked in my shirt when you moan it like you did the other night; made me cum so hard listenin." He's lookin up at you upside down but you're absolutely mortified, using your book to hide your face. What do you even say to him right now? "Aww, baby don't be shy. I do it when I think about you too. Cept I usually have a pair of your panties up to my nose." He shares with you happily and unapologetic, pulling the book from your fingers to toss it to the floor. "I wanna hear you say it like that again." Turning on his belly to leer at your clothed pussy through your tiny bottoms. Your breath picks up in anticipation, starin as his fine ass leans foward and gives a slow lick from slit to clit. The urgent, intense sensations has you squealing out his name as you slide both hands into his hair. "Satoruuu!" Slidin your shorts to the side, admiring your moist plump pussy lips. "Fuck baby, say it again. Just like that." He commands you, latching onto your sensitive lil button. All you can do is comply, buckin into his mouth as you wail 'Satoru' over and over to the damn heavens.
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fictionalstorybyme · 6 months
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Jaxson is a young hot dude and he knows a bit about how some people, boys mostly are in awe of his self-proclaimed awesomeness. He was very confident from years earlier and now at age eighteen he had a new group to torture with his cunning seductive smile and friendly manner. But he always had an agenda. He scoped out the students at the beginning of classes. He would trot in everyday in outfits that were made his admirers droll. His slender body was tailor made for the classic look of jeans and sneakers. He was able to pick out the various fetishes of each of the many who adored him as he flirted easily with boys, girls and teachers. He could map out a plan to get them to fall in love with him and used that to dominate and control them as he pleased. He possessed an arrogance and knew how to show his displeasure with a single look. An example was Ryan…
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He had this way of making you feel you were the only person in the room, the party, the world that counted to him. His ability to focus on you with 100% of his soul, that attention was crazy addictive. He created inside jokes that he could pass along a crowded with just his expressive eyes. It seemed every time you looked for him, he was already looking at you. Our eyes met and he winked and did a facial gesture or stick out his tongue and made me laugh. It seemed every time that I wanted to leave, he was by my side and asked me. “You wanna get something to eat (when I was hungry) or just go for a ride in his convertible. He had this sixth sense of what was going on inside my head. “Trouble with the big brother?” “Trouble with your mom?” “You can talk to me if you want, you know I’m always here. Quiet is good, too.” The thing is that he was always right. How he could tell if the situation was my big brother or my younger brother, he just read me like a book. It was really nice when i thought it was because he really cared. I had the house swept for spy shit, but nothing. He would have been the one, and i ain’t gay. But for him, I don’t know how it’d work, IF it’d work, but one thing was for sure. JAX KNEW ME KNOWS ME STILL to this VERY day. Jaxson knows me better than anybody and everybody combined.
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He keeps saying it’s in my head and that, yeah he had other friends. We were in high school, after all and our job was making and being friends. TRUE! He swears to this day, I was the real deal in his mind. THE BFF. “But Ryan,” Jax said, “You know you’re not gay. I know you’re not gay. So, understand I had to have other friends. I never wanted to say this, because: If I had said, “I L❤️ VE YOU” and your mind would be be in turmoil. I knew we made a good friendship match. Maybe at the beginning I might have thought it’d be cool to have one of the premier guys that i’ve ever known and had the distinct honor and pleasure to know and be friends with convert to the other team. Girls attempt to change guys like me to be straight. Would I actually be your friend if I attempted that with you? I KNOW I WOULDN’T HAVE BEEN HAPPY! Maybe for a the honeymoon period? That’s why it’s called the honeymoon period. It doesn’t last. If I had have said this earlier, Ryan, I’d never ever forgive myself. Ever! I really have always put your needs and wants ahead of mine. Always! I never wanted you to do anything just to please me and not please yourself. That’s what the people who get called that disgusting name. If loving me turned you into a fag, I’d sooner kill myself than permit that. I’m not that kind of guy who is selfish and wants to see if you’ll change teams to be with him.” “I get it, Jaxson. I really do. You are right. You never tried to convert me or suggest i experiment to be sure. But why didn’t you tell me that so i could shield myself from the eventual pain and suffering?”
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“For the same reason you didn’t tell me you were certain you were straight, Ryan. I didn’t know for sure just like you didn’t know for sure.” Ryan nodded and agreed, allowing all the rage and anger to dissipate and desolve into the either. “ONE THING WE DID KNOW FOR SURE!” Jaxson said. “WE WERE THE PERFECT COMBINATION OF WHAT LIFETIME FRIENDSHIPS HAVE IN COMMON. OPPOSITES ATTRACT AND RESPECT. If I didn’t respect you Ryan, I’d try to have you in my bed every night with experimenting as the reason why. Thats why we go to college. To try new things. You admitted you had a crush on me.” “A HUGE CRUSH!” Ryan corrected. “You were infatuated with me. Is that a fair statement?” “Yes,” Ryan said. “Well, I too am a human being capable of having crushes and being infatuated with another.” Jaxson said. “I had a huger crush, so infatuated was I with you that i couldn’t eat for ten days, because my infatuation turned into love. You don’t try to change the one you love into something they are not! You are not gay! I know that because Ry, I wanted you so bad, but you never picked up a clue. Am i correct?” “One hundred percent!” Ryan answered. “So we’re just friends?”
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theemporium · 8 months
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can i request a pt2 of being luke's bff and dating quinn?
thank you for requesting!🫶🏽
part one
.
“This is gross.”
“Mhm.” 
“I might actually puke, you know.”
“Mhm.”
“Just fully projectile vomit like the start of Pitch Perfect—”
“Are you done yet?” 
“No,” Luke deadpanned as he sat across on the other side of the firepit, his nose scrunched in disgust as he took in the sight of you sitting on his oldest brother’s lap. “This is inhumane to put me through and I won’t stand for it.”
“Big word there, Moose,” Quinn teased, the hint of a smirk on his lips that only infuriated the boy further.
Luke took the news of your and Quinn’s relationship about as good as you expected him to. It was a whole theatrical ordeal when you returned to Jersey after your week away at Quinn’s. It took you a week after you came back to finally get the guts to tell Luke, and the following week was spent listening to Luke whine about how out of every guy you had to date, it just had to be his brother.
He got over it eventually when he realised how happy you two made each other, and ended the week by saying he was just glad it was Quinn and not Jack.
But that didn’t mean he wanted to spend the whole summer watching you paw at each other right in front of him.
“This is torture,” Luke concluded after a few moments, his eyes narrowing slightly. “She’s my best friend.”
“She’s my girlfriend,” Quinn retorted.
“She is sitting right here,” you spoke up as you glanced between the two boys. “If you don’t behave, I’m spending all summer with Jack and Trevor.”
“You say that like it’s a bad alternative,” Trevor commented.
“Because it is,” Quinn grumbled, only to receive a soft slap on his chest from you.
“Be nice,” you told him with a stern look.
“Yeah, Quinn, be nice!” Jack repeated, a shit-eating grin spread across his face that he knew would only piss his brother off more. 
“You too,” you said with a mocking glare, but the smile on your face ruined the impact. You opened your mouth to say something more, only for a shiver to run down your spine. 
“Cold?” Quinn frowned but he was already moving before you could stop him. In seconds, his hoodie was placed in your hands as he gave you a soft smile. “I’m fine with the fire anyways, promise.”
“Thanks, babe,” you murmured with a smile as you leaned down to press a quick kiss to his lips before pulling the hoodie over your head, letting the smell of his cologne and the warm fabric overwhelm you.
“UGH THEY ARE KISSING NOW!” 
You rolled your eyes. “I’m not above doing more to shut you up.”
Luke’s face instantly scrunched up. “Ew no, my room is right next to his. Don’t even think about it.”
Quinn snorted. “Well—”
“MOM!”
.
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ellecdc · 1 month
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He's loved, Sirius (Sirius finds out about Remus' relationship w/ you & Reg) 🫧 The Dancing Queen (Remus' first party with you and Reg) 🫧 Master Regulus (you & Reg get into a fight, angst with a happy ending) The Origin (poly!moonwater x reader beginning headcanons) Summer at the Potters (Effie takes in you & Reg) Big Brother Sirius (Sirius being readers [adoptive] big brother) Messy (the boys vs your mess) Bitten (you were bitten over the hols, feat. bff Barty + big brother Sirius) Girl's Night (you come home drunk after a fun night with the girls [+barty]) 🫧 BSL for Dummies (moonwater introduces themselves to mute!reader[gn]) Flu Blues (the boys find out fem!reader came home from work sick) 🫧 Whoopsie? (headcanon's of moonwater finding out reader is pregnant) ->Pregnant? (afab rem!reader tells the boys she's expecting) -> the fusser and the coddler (readers first trimester) -> I'm spreading the news (you & the boys tell your friends/2nd trimester) -> our baby has four feet? (you & the boys find out it's twins) -> There's Two!? (the twins are born and introduced to their family) moonwater in the bedroom headcanons (18+)
🫧 = elle’s favourites
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norrisreads · 19 days
Text
you belong with me #OP81
PLOT : so what happens now, that you've confessed your long term crush towards your very own bestfriend. Will everything turn out great and smooth for you, or will there be someone else to replace that heartache of yours?
PAIRING : oscar piastri x reader! lando norris x reader!
WARNINGS : slight angst, fluff!
a/n : i’ve decided to disregard the inspiration from ag “we can’t be friends” & my english isn’t fluent so pardon the errors 🙏🏻
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Was avoiding the oscar piastri, who happened to be your very own bestfriend who you’ve confessed to, possible? The answer to that question is no.
You’ve found yourself gotten closer to lando, with him aiding you and providing you with support you’ve never knew you needed. You currently just landed a job with Mclaren, focusing on social media marketing, which could’ve meant there’s a huge chance of you bumping to Oscar for work purposes.
Things have been so much worse for you eversince the confession, countless rumours were spread wildfire on the internet, comments on your social medias was all related to oscar’s and you friendship, it had gotten out of hand to the point you’ve decided to create a new instagram page and deactivating the previous instagram page.
Currently, you were out with your/bff/name to celebrate lando’s birthday in a big club located in Monaco. You aren’t really a huge club enthusiast but since it’s Lando’s special day, you’ve decided to go ahead with the plan and the future you should’ve stopped you.
Because, here you are currently emptying your guts out while sitting in the freezing tile restroom of the loud club you're now in. Eventhough the purpose of this club outing is celebrating Lando's birthday, but here he is holding your hair and wiping away your smudged liner tears, caressing your back smoothly.
With your best friend, guarding the restroom door while admiring both of you, and then you hear a click sound
"not to ruin the mood, but you guys should totally date" showing lando the photo she’d just took, “send me that”
"really, now? not the time”
Sobbing while still trying to empty more of what you have drank in the last few hours
"i am just saying, look who’s here being lovey dovey taking care of you, eventhough he has to be out there to entertain his own birthday party?”
rolling your eyes, “you shouldn’t have forced me to drink that many cups, lan”
glaring at lando, which he successfully avoid
“did he ever contact you?”
“he, as in oscar piastri” your/bestff/name added on to her previous question
shaking your head letting her know a “no”
“Dickhead” you could hear Lando’s muttered
“hey, don’t let this affect the friendship the both of you had”
lando sighs, “he’s not talking to me, i’m just doing the same”
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lafilledhiver just posted a story
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seen by oscarpiastri landonorris charles_leclerc
lafilledhiver happiest birthday my london boy landonorris luv you forever (do not take me out for the next 24/36 hours)
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It has been a few months since lando’s birthday celebration, both lando and you were currently seated on the second floor of the mclaren’s hospitality.
Lando has successfully convinced you in accompanying him to the current season grand prix, and here you are currently in the suzuka circuit.
Though, following lando for the current season grand prix, has it’s pros and cons. Rumours regarding you started to grow, especially as the wag’s instagram page managed to let your instagram page get known to the whole world, and now your comment section has just been filled with either your situation with both of the McLaren boys.
And, the one rumour that has been rising up for the past few days, was regarding lando’s current relationship with you.
Yes, you are currently dating the mclaren driver, lando norris. Did you ever expected this to have happened? no.
Few months back, just a week after lando’s birthday, he had confessed to you drukenly.
You were taken aback, but you thought back on what your/bestff/name said when it was the night of lando’s birthday party and you agreed, on dating lando norris.
Dating lando norris, healed you. Everything you did with oscar, you’ve done it with lando, except it was 100% better because you finally knew that this is how love feels like.
while you were trying to engulf yourself to your current workload, lando has just been right beside you, going though with his team on strategies for qualifying. You’ve tried giving them the space the team needed, but lando refused to and pushed you back to your sear which was beside him.
Then you felt, a phone sliding between the space of lando’s and your’s computer. There was another article stated, “Mclaren drivers tension explained, and it was all because of y/n”
“explain, now. Both of you” there oscar was, standing there with rage
“there’s no explanation” shrugging your shoulders
then oscar faced lando, “you’re pathetic, going after own my best friend” punching lando to the ground
“what the fuck oscar?” trying your best to seperate the both of them, with max holding on to lando
“what the fuck is wrong with you, y/n. What is wrong with you. Why him? My own teammate?” oscar voice has gotten louder and louder, which you’re so glad that all of you were currently in the staff’s area and thankful that it’s soundproof
ignoring oscar, you told lando that you’ll be back and you just needed a talk with oscar, which Lando agreed on
“let’s go”, grabbing oscar’s hand and pulling him to his driver room, and slamming and locking the door behind you.
“talk” oscar could sense that you were angry with the sudden change of your demeanour , and when you’re angry he knew it’ll be tough for him to explain
“look, i don’t know what has gotten to me alright? Lily showed me that, and i guess anger just took over me?”
you shook your head, “not reasonable for you to punch my boyfriend, explain or i’m never giving you a second chance”
he sighed, “lily broke up with me”
and with that coming out of oscar’s lips, you couldn’t help but to be shocked
“what? how did that happened?”
“this”, oscar pointed to the space between us, “lily thinks i am in love with you”
“well, are you?” you asked him, while raising your brows
he nods, which made u automatically faced him
“oscar, what?” and before you could continue whatever you’ve wanted to say, oscar cut you off
“look, when you left, something in me died, it’s as if i don’t look forward to anything anymore. At first i thought, it’s because you were always right beside me and i had to get used to being alone but it’s not that.
way before i met lily, i really liked you, but i was just scared. Scared that it will ruin whatever friendship we had, and i treasure the friendship more than ever. Then, when you left lily and i had a talk, she’s the one who showed me the article of lando and you”
“keepings tabs on me, i have a fan” you scoffed
“she liked you, she was just jealous over you. She broke up with me, because she wanted our friendship to reconcile, and she pushed me to kinda have a talk with you. y/n, meeting you will always be my favourite memory but you being a memory will always break my heart ” oscar’s palms were now on your shoulders, which meant you were forced to face oscar’s face
“osc, i no longer have feelings for you. It’s true, i am dating lando, and i’m happy. He makes me feel seen. Whenever, i am around him, he makes me feel the happiest person in the whole world. I use to feel that way with you, but now it’s a different person”
you felt oscar’s palm slowly releasing from your shoulders, “i am happy for you y/n and I understand, i guess something just took over me when i realise i’ve lost you to lando. Something that was once could be mine”
“I should go, you should have a talk with lily. Fix the relationship between the both of you, you are each other soulmates”
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lafilledhiver_ instagram page
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lafilledhiver_ just posted
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liked by oscarpiastri landonorris maxfewtrell and others
lafilledhiver_ receiving princess treatment from my very own london boy landonorris
↳ landonorris who is that fine babe??????????
↳ maxfewtrell that fine babe is your girlfriend
↳ oscarpiastri gross, ew
↳ lafilledhiver_ he’s lost plesee pick him up lilyzneimer
↳ lilyzneimer on it 🙏🏻
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Eversince oscar and you had the talk, things between the both of you has gone exceptionally well. Oscar relationship with lily is getting better, and there were times that the both of them would join lando’s and you dates.
The four of you were currently on a double date, oscar and lando both at the supermarket getting some groceries while lily and you were both in your shared house with lando
“thanks for hearing out oscar by the way, he loves you alot lily, trust me” smiling towards lily
“i’m sorry about the way i act towards you back then, i was jealous on how kind and soft osc was towards you, and now i finally realise. You’re really too kind for the world, y/n”
And just a few minutes afterwards, you could hear the door lock getting unlocked which signalled that the boys were back.
Both lily and you stood up to help the boys with the groceries, “are you feeding for the whole village?” with the amount of snacks, instant food in at least 2/4 bags
“we got distracted” oscar laughed
“clearlyyyy” lily’s rolling her eyes sarcastically
then u felt lando’s arms around you, “ i got you those puffs that you loved, you are running out of them. Got you those frog chocolates too that you seem to love so much with the amount that i’ve seen you sneaked in my bag. There’s others, it could filled the fridge for at least while i am gone”
Facing towards lando’s face, and giving him a quick kiss on the lips, “you’re the best, this is why you are my boyfriend”
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Lando had left you for the Azerbajian grand prix, you decided to take some time off and have time to yourself.
Did you miss Lando? Of course you did, but it helped with lando facetiming you every time he was given a short free period, with him explaining his day, the car, the strategy
You’ve also decided to stop working under Mclaren, and instead found something to do that you’ve always been wanting, opening up your very own small cafe in the neighbourhood that oscar and you grew up in
Lando was iffy about it at the start but slowly supported you, giving you advices on what he had learnt from his current company, going furniture and equipment shopping with you, following you to the store every time the renovation team called for you
You’ve never not once regret getting lando norris as the love of your life, and oscar piastri as your best friend because it is reallt the best of both worlds.
lafilledhiver_ just posted
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liked by lewishamilton maxfewtrell lnfour and others
lafilledhiver_ i said yes
↳ y/bff/n i manifested this, congratulations luv!!!!!!
↳ maxfewtrell finally 👋, no refunds y/n
↳ lafilledhiver_ there’s a year warranty
↳ maxfewtrell not applicable for sale items sadly 😔
↳ landonorris guys??? really????????
↳ lilyzneimer i’m so happy for you 🥹
↳ lafilledhiver_ oscarpiastri you’re next
⋆ ˚。⋆୨୧˚ author note ˚୨୧⋆。˚⋆
Thank you so much for waiting, originally there was another plot that i had in mind to publish, but i've realised that tumblr has deleted my newest draft which led to the plot to be changed! Do let me know if you would like an alternate ending, where reader will end up with oscar! Once again thank you so much for the support, i've never knew that people would actually enjoy reading what i've put out so far in my blog!
⋆ ˚。⋆୨୧˚ taglist ˚୨୧⋆。˚⋆
@vicurious28 @epsiespace @hopefulcupcakerebel @randomgirlnumber13 @leclercdream @yourbane @hellof-1 @evie-119 @saachiep81 @invictusrey @cmleitora @icedoutmay @mimosa6 @d3kstar @daemyratwst
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hollytoshaw · 30 days
Text
singer!y/n | harry lewis
summary: singer!y/n & wroetoshaw are the internet's fave couple (fem reader)
a/n: love love love singer x youtuber au my fave. also the song 'golden hour' mentioned in my head is the kacey musgraves one so if you need to imagine something listen to that!
requests: pls keep sending them in but don't send other blogs the same ones cos then we'll all be doing the same things xxx
rest of my work hereeee : masterlist
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y/n_username posted a photo!
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liked by ksi and 950,201 others! y/n_username last night on the graham norton show! had so much fun. also performed a new single from the album so go watch now!!!🎤💘
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taliamar just amazing🤭 ↳ y/n_username love love love you
faithlouiseak omg she famous famous ↳ y/n_username hahaha stop
wroetoshaw prettiest girl in the world ↳ y/n_username loveeee youuuu
w2slover3 omg her live performance of golden hour was amazing
ksi goat
sidemenfan neeed to watch asap
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y/n's album features in sidemen guess the song
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- y/n_username posted a photo!
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liked by reneerap & 940,204 others! y/n_username so excited to announce i'm going on tour!!!! here are the dates for my european tour. tickets go on sale on friday. supporting act is the one and only talia mar <333
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taliamar I'M SO EXCITED
freyanightingale my girls!!!!!
wroetoshaw can't wait x
r0sielewis OMG POPSTAR
faithlouiseak my bff is an icon>>>
geenelly slay
sidemanxfan i need tickets
harryxlewisfan selling my house if it means i can get y/n tickets
w2slover imagine if harry goes on tour with her
ynharryfan talia x y/n i'm in love
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y/n_username posted a photo!
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liked by wroetoshaw & 840,204 others! y/n_username back home with my boys before tour begins <3 tagged: wroetoshaw-
taliamar so cute
faithlouiseak so gorg babe
freyanightingale herrrrrb
wroetoshaw love you my girl
sidemanxfan omg tour is nearly starting
harryxlewisfan so wholesome
w2slover how are we gonna survive without a month of y/n & harry content ↳ y/n_username he'll defo be at all her shows!!!
ynharryfan harry in the third pic>>>
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EUROPEAN TOUR nov 04-nov27
tour day 1! - london, uk
y/n_username posted a photo!
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liked by taliamar and 982,029 others! y/n_username tour day one complete!!!! london you were incredible. ty taliamar for being the best supporting act ever. also big thank you to my biggest supporter for coming along with us, i love you lots wroetoshaw! see you in two days berlin!!!! tagged wroetoshaw ,taliamar
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sidemanfan4 ur so pretty 😍😍😍
calfreezy sick first show mate
callux loved it
wroetoshaw sounded a bit off key sometimes xxx
r0sielewis was amazing thank u for inviting me!!! 😭
w2slover I CAN'T wait for your concert
sidemenw2s2 omg harry being there to support her????
w2sluvy/n i was in the crowd and could see harry filming her for the whole concert??? so cute
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tour day 2 - berlin, germany
y/n_username posted a photo!
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liked by ksi and 832,029 others! y/n_username day 2 of the tour complete! berlin you were amazing. i love love love being in germany and this show made me love it even more. thanks to all that came out to support. next stop paris!!!
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sidemanfan4 😍😍😍
wroetoshaw so fit
w2slover when she gave a shoutout to harry>>>
sidemenw2s2 i saw harry backstage omg!!!!
w2sluvy/n such a slay outfit
faithlouiseak you look insaneeee
taliamar such a good show babe
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tour day 3 - paris, france
y/n_username posted a photo!
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liked by wroetoshaw and 982,029 others! y/n_username day off tour to explore paris!!! can't wait for the show tonight, see you all there xxx tagged wroetoshaw
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sidemanfan4 mum and dad
calfreezy give me a free ticket
wroetoshaw fit geeza in the last pic
r0sielewis miss you both sm xxx
w2slover omg exploring paris together so cute
sidemenw2s2 such wholesome babes
w2sluvy/n love my parents
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y/n_username posted a photo!
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liked by ksi and 832,029 others! y/n_username PARIS you were amazing!!! big kisses to everyone that came to support. love love love performing in france, french fans you are amazing. and taliamar smashed it again, best support act i could ask for! tagged taliamar
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sidemanfan4 i just know harry's jel of her back up dancers
wroetoshaw best outfit so far
w2slover did anyone see the papparazi pics of harry and y/n???
sidemenw2s2 the pics of them cuddling walking round paris omg
w2sluvy/n such a slay outfit
faithlouiseak i love ur face
taliamar best show so far!!!!
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151 notes · View notes
lovebugism · 1 year
Note
hi hello "love you on purpose" absolutely devasted me with it's cuteness and i cannot wait for part two!!!! 💗
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✶ ┄ LOVE YOU, ON PURPOSE (ii)
part one | part two
summary: steve can't seem to stay away from the local freaks. he's more surprised to find himself falling for one of them. you have trouble believing that someone like him could want you in the first place. he wants to prove to you that he's not king steve anymore. (18k)
pairing: steve harrington / eddie's bff!reader
tags: strangers to friends to lovers, mutual pining, idiots in love, slight angst, hurt to comfort (sorta), fem!reader TW smut 18+, lots of intimacy and affection and awkwardness, p in v sex, talks of insecurities, reader has an allison reynolds-esque transformation but with a better ending (outfit inspo x, x), probable typos
a/n: welp. here it is. the final part of this 30k+ word fic. it was very fun and very painful to write and i'm very glad it's finally done and out in the world! thanks for all the love on the first part btw reading all the feedback has easily been my favorite part of writing this <3 with that being said, get comfy, get a snack, and enjoy! xoxo
˗ˋˏ ♡ ˎˊ˗
Falling over you is the news of the day.
If yearning had a shape, you’re pretty sure it’d look an awful lot like you. 
The clumsiest of humans, fresh into her adulthood but still feeling like a child most days. Soaking wet, born yesterday. A caterpillar weaving her cocoon and trying to figure out where she fits in the world. The girl who decides she belongs right next to this big, boisterous, multi-colored butterfly she couldn’t stand a year or more ago.
And Steve Harrington, he was… Well, he was the kind of poem people spend their entire lives trying to write. 
He was the perfect mixture of beauty and warmth, of mystery and obscurity — the line where the pink of a sunset meets the purple of a starry night. He was all of this rolled up into a twenty-something-year-old boy. A fumbling butterfly that’s getting used to his new wings.
Maybe if you were talented enough, you could write the thing yourself. There’s something powerful in knowing that you could compose some dainty requiem so much bigger than yourself. A beautiful thing that would stand the test of time because there would never be anything else like it. 
It wouldn’t be because of you, though. You passed Ms. O’Donnell’s English class by the skin of your teeth, so your writing leaves much to be desired. It would be your muse that would enamor the masses come the next several centuries, because there will never, ever be another Steve Harrington.
At the very core of this poem would read a universal truth: I have fallen in love with his enigmatic being, and now I’m dealing with the consequences.
Well, you’re trying to deal with them, at least. You’re not having a very easy go at it.
Most of the time, you feel like a thousand bricks have piled on top of you. The jagged edges scrape up your arms and press varying shades of purple into your skin. They crush you underneath their weight, but you don’t try too hard to climb out from under them. You couldn’t even if you wanted to.
You feel a little stuck underneath all the feelings you have for Steve. 
You’re not quite sure what to do with them all. They’re too heavy to lift; there’s too much of them to crawl out. It all leaves you feeling a bit trapped. 
It’s a good kind of trapped, though. 
Once the hurt passes, the weight starts to feel like you’re being swaddled in a blanket. Or a cocoon. 
As scared as it makes you, as overwhelmed as you feel, you don’t want this puppy-like adoration to end.
But sometimes, the scrapes sting more than they usually do. The scabs split and start to weep. The faded bruises turn purple again, then to blue and black, and they ache all over. They remind you that girls like you don’t end up with guys like Steve, and the harsh realization turns the comforting weight of being in love into feeling like you’re being buried alive.
Steve is a pretty boy. He’s a rich, prettyboy who wears vintage jeans and drives a new Beemer and has never wanted for anything in his life.
And you’re… whatever the total opposite of that is.
You wear whatever’s cheapest at the thrift store or what Eddie lets you steal from his closet. You drive a rust bucket that belonged to your dad until he lost his license, so the thing practically rotted in the backyard until you got yours. And all you’ve ever done is want for things because you’ve never had anything.
And the one thing you want the most is something you’ve never been able to admit to anyone. Not even Eddie. Not even yourself. 
Screw new clothes or a car fresh off the lot. You don’t want popularity — you don’t even want money (though it certainly wouldn’t hurt). You want so desperately to be loved that it makes your bones ache.
All you want is someone to hold your wrists and kiss your palms, to cradle you when the thunder is too loud and the cracks of lightning make you shake, to be a hiding place where you can keep every secret and be certain it stays safe.
You want someone to smile at you the way Steve smiles at you. You want to feel held the way he makes you feel held — without ever touching you. You want to feel wanted the way he makes you feel wanted.
You want Steve. 
And you’re not sure how long silly love songs will substitute your yearning.
“What do you think about Steve?” you ask Eddie out of the blue.
He was in the middle of a rant about his latest campaign, but you hadn’t heard a single word of it if you’re honest. The butterflies in your stomach were too loud.
The boy sits across the room at his desk, back hunched, while he scribbles ideas into his tattered Dungeons and Dragons composition journal. You’re sprawled out in the middle of his bed like you have been for the past hour, making constellations of Steve’s face from the marks on his ceiling.
“I think he’s an asshole,” Eddie answers without missing a beat.
It makes you roll your eyes. You shouldn’t have expected anything less out of him, really. You toy with the frayed hem of your crop top and rephrase. “Okay, but do you think he likes me?”
“I know he likes you,” he scoffs. “That’s the problem.”
You smile widely to yourself, then purse your lips to the side to keep it hidden. There’s no one looking to see you grinning like an idiot, but it doesn’t make you feel any less like one.
“He wants to take me on a date tonight,” you confess out loud for the first time.
It wasn’t like you to keep something like that from Eddie. Or anything. At all. But you found yourself hiding it like some kind of dark secret. A distant part of you was terrified that it was all in your head, but it’s been three days since Steve asked you now. Which means you’ve spent three days pinching yourself.
You haven’t woken up yet.
“Like, a date date,” you clarify and rise on your elbows to study the boy across the room. 
You feel the need to explain yourself because movie nights and rides around town and hanging out in the break room after closing don’t feel nearly as serious as Steve wining and dining you. It feels much more official now, as though the line between liking someone and like-liking them has been drawn.
“And I’ve never been on a date date before—”
“What about the one time you went out with, uh…” Eddie trails off as he aggressively erases something on his paper. He stills and squints over his shoulder at you. “What was his name? Matt? Marcus?”
“Mason,” you correct and try not to shudder at the memory. “And I left him at the restaurant because he asked me how big my boobs were within the first ten minutes, so he doesn’t count.”
A grin pulls at the boy’s face. He chuckles to himself. “Oh, yeah.”
“And I know I shouldn’t be so nervous about it ‘cause it’s just a dumb date, like… We’ve been alone together a billion times now, you know? It’s just…” you ramble in one breath, then trail off with a huff. You flop back onto the mattress rather dramatically. “Steve Harrington doesn’t date girls like me. He dates girls like Nancy Wheeler. And, as far as I’m concerned, they were a matching made in fucking heaven— I mean, I didn’t know them back then or anything—”
“Obviously,” Eddie murmurs. “That was a train wreck.”
“—But they looked fucking perfect together, Eds!”
The image of them walking the hallways of Hawkins High isn’t hard to picture. You can still see Nancy in her pretty pleated skirt and pink manicured nails and Steve with his stupid hair and brand new Ray-Bans. They owned the school like their parents owned Hawkins — it was practically kismet. 
You try to picture him and you together, and it doesn’t come as effortlessly. 
It’s like trying to wedge pieces from opposites puzzles together; it just doesn’t work. 
And it’s different from anyone Steve’s ever dated. It’s different from anyone you’ve ever dated. People look at him and his pretty girlfriend and gush, “oh, wow, they look good together.” People look at you and a guy with smudged eyeliner and heeled boots and whisper in disgust, “oh god, they deserve each other.”
You won’t get any of the kindness that Steve is used to, only stares from strangers as they try hopelessly to figure out whether or not you’re dating — because surely, he wouldn’t stoop low enough to date someone like you.
“And I don’t wanna…” you waver, trying and failing to put your fears into words. “I don’t know, I guess I’m just scared.”
Eddie shakes his head to himself. “You don’t need to be scared, okay?” he mumbles, his attention still turned down to his notebook.
“Oh, thanks, Eds. I’m cured,” you monotone.
“I just mean that—” he cuts himself off with a deep sigh and swivels in his chair to face you completely. “Steve’s a douchebag, alright? But he’s a good douchebag.”
Your brows furrow. “…What?”
“He used to be an asshole and everything, but… I don’t know, I guess he turned out to be a pretty good guy— and if you tell him I told you that, I will kill you,” Eddie explains in one breath. The half-hearted threat spills from his mouth,and he goes suddenly soft. “He’s not gonna hurt you, okay? I promise. I mean, the guy’s practically a fucking teddy bear.”
A smile pulls slow at your lips. 
It’s the nicest thing you’ve ever heard him say about Steve, despite having been friends with him for nearly a year now. The foreign kindness comforts you well enough. If Eddie didn’t think Steve was every bit the good douchebag he says he is, there’s no way he’d let you go anywhere near him.
“Yeah?” you mutter.
“Yeah,” he echoes with a huff, obviously upset about having to admit such a truth. Then he shrugs. “And if he does hurt you, I’ll beat him up. Which, with his track record, I’m guessing it wouldn’t be too difficult.”
A laugh tumbles from your mouth. “Thanks for looking out, Eds.”
He only grumbles in response.
And even though he complains the entire time, he drops you back off at your place and helps you agonize over what to wear. He sits on your bathroom counter to keep you company while you shower, then holds your makeup bag in his lap while you get ready. He only comments once about how differently you’re doing it.
Then the boy lounges on your bed, legs crossed and back propped on the headboard while you rifle through your closet. In true Eddie Munson fashion, he’s got something to say about everything you pick out.
Your white sweater is too tight, he tells you, and the fuzzy texture feels too weird. The plaid skirt you pull from the depths of your closet is too “christmas-y” and “totally not your color.” He tells you he likes your boots better as he helps you with the finicky buckle of your Mary Janes, then snaps the band of your knee-highs when he stands again.
Eddie tells you all of this because it’s easier to tease you than to say what he really thinks — that it feels like you’re in high school again and trying out styles that don’t suit you.
He loved you the way you were, in black and leather and silver chains and fishnets, because he knew that’s what you felt good in. You found your identity in your unconventional style and you sparkled in it.
And you were still pretty like this, dressed in brighter colors and looking like the girls that used to bully you in high school, but it’s so obviously not you. More than anything, it irks him that you’re doing all of this for Steve ‘The Hair’ Harrington.
But Eddie knows that you’re nervous — he can tell by the way you’re talking a thousand miles a minute and checking your appearance in the mirror every couple seconds like something might’ve changed. He also knows that you’re still skeptical about this whole thing. Because you have no idea that Steve looks at you like the whole world could crumble around him, and he wouldn’t even blink.
You don’t know that you have nothing to worry about.
So Eddie figures he’ll wait to make fun of you. Save all his teasing remarks for when you’re gushing about the date the next day.
But you’re already aware of all this — how different you look. You hardly recognize yourself when you look in the mirror. You’ve traded in your shades of black for something brighter. Your blowsy hair is clipped back out of your face. Your makeup is more conventional and modest than you’re used to.
You look less like the freak you usually are and more like a wild thing that’s been tamed.
You feel pretty. 
Or, at the very least, the idea that Steve will think you’re pretty makes you feel pretty.
It makes all the imposter syndrome worth it. 
You stand in front of the full-length mirror and tug the scratchy socks up and over your knee when they start to slip down. You rise once more, giving yourself another once over, then nod in approval — pleased with the costume you’ve put on.
A fleeting through with a mean, green, bleeding heart and a mind of its own scratches bitterly at the confines of your skull.
Eat your heart out, Nancy Wheeler.
˗ˋˏ ♡ ˎˊ˗
The ghost in you, she don't fade.
Steve, riddled with chronic feelings of inadequacy, overcooks the chicken and spritzes too much cologne on himself.
He had always been the kind of boy that loved things a little harder than he should’ve. 
Ask any plant he’s ever owned that he accidentally killed with every leaf he overwatered, frightened that anything less would be neglectful. He was always so scared of them dying that he suffocated them until they wilted anyway.
He thought he might’ve grown out of all that until he realized he did the same thing with Nancy. 
He squeezed her too tight and she squirmed at his smothering, called him bullshit and pushed him away so she could breathe again, then stomped on his heart until she was certain it stopped beating for her.
And therein lies the state of limbo Steve Harrington has lived in all his life — between loving something too much and not enough. He hasn’t yet found that balance that stops plants from dying and people from running away.
He isn’t quite sure how to be anything other than the man he is now. 
His conscious clings to your every move. He thinks about when he’s awake, and when he isn’t, he hopes he’ll be lucky enough to dream about you. He bothers you at work all day, then asks if you want to go for a ride when you’re off because he hates being away from you. The nights get too cold when you stray too far. And even though he’s never been much of a chef, he offers to cook for you because he wants to show you he cares enough to try.
Steve’s the kind of guy that overcooks his chicken because he’s terrified that you’ll get sick if it’s not done enough. He’s the kind of guy that douses himself in cologne, then breaks the bottle because he’s terrified of not smelling good enough. He wants everything to be enough for you. 
Steve Harrington, for once in his life, wants to be enough for somebody. 
But now all he is, is a stupid boy that never learns, who smells like he’s trying to overcompensate for being a terrible, terrible chef. 
When Nancy broke his heart, he wasn’t sure he’d be able to be this person again. Steve was scared he’d become someone he didn’t recognize — someone who didn’t care enough to water plants because, hey, they’re gonna die anyway, right? Because he gave and gave and gave, and had nothing to show for it but a stupid wilting flower.
Steve made a dark room of his broken heart. A boogeyman lived there, too. It made him scared that he’d never be able to love someone like he loved Nancy.
But then you came out of nowhere — this beautiful, loud, and mysterious thing that exudes every color of the rainbow when she laughs, despite her blacker-than-black wardrobe. You smile at him like you’ve never been hurt, like a sun that’s never known the night. It makes him feel like he can be that too.
The two of you seek a similar solace in one another. You fill each other’s voids without effort and without trying, like puzzle pieces or halves of an orange.
Steve met you and he realized that he didn’t get his ability to love from Nancy. He had always been a lover, a boy who could love something deeply, and that didn’t go away when she broke his heart.
And sometimes it was awful. It was painful and frightening more than it was anything else — love. It was doubtful and envious and distant. 
Love makes you selfish and creepy and uncharacteristically overbearing. Love makes you worry about your hair and overcook your chicken and drench yourself in cologne. Love takes a hell of a lot of hope, and that’s what he feels like when he’s with you — hopeful. Like he’s never been hurt before.
A surge of optimism and apprehension hits him like a bolt of purple lightning just behind his ribcage when the doorbell rings. Mostly because he knows you’re waiting on the other side of it. His hands shake when he opens the door, but not because he’s scared. He’s just full of hope and buzzing with its foreign intensity.
Steve finds the rest of his life standing on his front porch, dressed in all the trappings of his past.
You’re smiling wide when you see him, the same whizzing ball of hope that he is now, and clutching a bottle of wine. You’ve traded your usual grocery store alcohol for something bottom shelf from an actual liquor store. The sunshine grin you’re wearing is about the only thing familiar about you now.
With your hair pulled back, brows combed neatly to match the pretty makeup you’ve spotted gingerly on your features, dressed in foreign colors with knee-high socks and kitten heels — you look nothing like yourself. It’s a costume you’ve got on, still so pretty but pretending in some way.
It has Steve startled for a moment, thinking Halloween came a whole six months earlier and he never got the memo. Then he realizes you must’ve gotten all dressed up for him, even though you never had to. Just like he didn’t have to try and play chef to impress you.
Both of you are just stupid idiots who care too much, making it painfully obvious despite your best efforts to keep it hidden.
“Hi,” you grin sheepishly through a foreign, pale pink, and glossy mouth.
Steve’s too busy gaping at you to respond in a timely fashion.
The wind billows through your hair and sends strands of it flying in your face. And even though he can’t remember a time when you’ve ever worried about the wild halo on your head, you’re quick to tuck them back into place again. 
With most of it pulled back and combed with obvious intent, your face is left unhidden. Your neck and shoulders and collarbones are too. And you’ve got on this tight sweater and pretty skirt and tall socks that make your legs look longer. All of your usually concealed features are heightened. 
The dainty swipes of mascara, eyeshadow, and blush only accentuate them further, though your spots are attentively covered with foundation that isn’t exactly your shade. It’s a bit lighter than your skin tone, like you’d gotten it some time ago when you were still a bit paler.
You look less like the loud, plucky girl he’s come to know and someone more timid, delicate, and polished.
You’re so pretty he damn near forgets how to speak. His tongue swells and every word he could use loses meaning at the sight of you. But it isn’t you, and that only confounds him further.
It’s like you’ve covered yourself in body paint. The real version of you is hidden somewhere underneath it all, glimmering somehow more golden than the flaxen you’re playing pretend in.
When Steve realizes he hasn’t yet answered you, it feels like it’s been ten minutes or more. In reality, no longer than five seconds have gone by.
“Hey,” he greets finally, in an exhale that gets caught in his throat halfway through. He clears it and smiles shakily. “Hi.”
He steps to the side of the doorway and ushers you inside. He wipes his sweaty palms on his slacks when he thinks you aren’t looking, but you catch him in the act when you turn to face him again. Your grin widens and you trap it between your teeth.
“Smells good in here,” you compliment, walking slowly backward with your hands clasped behind your back.
“Thanks,” he accepts your flattery with an awkward hand on his neck. “Yeah, uh— I kinda burnt the chicken a little bit, but everything else should be good. At least, I hope it’s good. It’s kinda hard to mess up a salad, right?”
He laughs under his breath, then starts to ramble without realizing it.
“I’m not the best cook, as it turns out. I mean, I thought I could at least fake it, you know? Fake it ’til you make it, or whatever that bullshit saying is — but there is no faking the tornado I just had in the kitchen. I don’t think I’ve made a bigger mess in my life. But, uh, yeah… And don’t worry! I didn’t put tomatoes in the pasta. Or the salad. Or the sauce. I know you don’t think them, so…”
You’re in the middle of beaming and trying very hard not to laugh when he hits you with that one. 
Steve, like you, is having a very hard time shutting up just now. He’s in the same web of nervousness that you’re spun up in too. He’s all tangled and trying to weave words that make sense, though everything things his mouth in half-thoughts.
But then he says something so strangely profound out of nowhere, and it makes your pounding heart stop without warning. He’s just talking about fucking tomatoes, but you understand that — in some weird, roundabout way — that it’s much deeper than that.
You’d told him the mundane little detail in passing some time ago. At the diner, when you picked the fruit from your burger with a grimace on your face. You said it tasted like battery acid and tainted everything it touched. He took it back to the counter when you weren’t brave enough to. 
“Here you go, Punchy. Your battery-acid-free burger,” he’d joked when he set the fresh plate in front of you.
And he remembered all that. He tucked that tiny piece of information about you into the very back of his mind so that he could use it to make you happy later on.
That’s adoration at its core, you figure. Somewhere in all those minuscule remember-ings.
“You remembered that?” you wonder aloud in a bemused sort of whisper.
Steve has already moved on. He’s rambling about the broken spout of his cologne bottle but stops the second he realizes he’s doing it.
Of course, I did, scoffs the little voice in his head. I’m sorta obsessed with you, as it turns out.
He doesn’t tell you that, though, for reasons he finds are quite obvious — the most significant of which would be running you off entirely. So instead, he just shrugs and tries to be cool, despite having already established how terribly uncool he is.
“Yeah. I remember everything.”
When the two of you settle at the dining table, Steve realizes he’s eaten most of his dinners alone until now.
His parents stopped caring sometime around middle school. His dad got too busy with work, started staying after-hours to catch up on paperwork or screw his secretary. And his mom didn’t care because she was too busy getting wine-drunk on the phone with whatever book club friend that was just as miserable as she was. 
Steve would fork at his cold pad thai while he listened to his mother’s muffled rant about who went where and who wore a hat.
He couldn’t find it in himself to eat in his room. The empty dinner table was the only sort of stable routine he had in the swirling uncertainty of being a teenage boy.
But now he’s got you. 
He hopes he never stops having you. He doesn’t want to go back to being alone like that again, not after he’s found someone that can fill an entire room with their laugh.
The cackle you let out at Steve’s terrible, terrible cheese pun — “yeah, I guess you could say I cooked this all on my provol-own — echoes through the dining room. Even though he knows you’re laughing at him and not exactly with him, he figures it’s a small price to pay to keep hearing such a heavenly sound.
It reminds him of the real you, the one underneath all the foreign regalia. 
The rays of your usual sunshine peek from the clouds you hide behind. You’re way too bright to stay hidden.
Steve can tell you’re watching his every move. You eye him from across the table with the intent of doing everything he’s doing, lest you might do something wrong. He puts his napkin in his lap, so you put your napkin your lap. He cuts his chicken with his fork and knife, so you cut your chicken with a fork and knife — though you quickly realize you’re not quite as dexterous as he is for all that.
It’s endearing. The kind of cute that makes his heart hurt just a little bit. He hides his smile and happily abandons the conventional things he’d been taught to do. He eats with his fingers and then licks the pads of them, grinning when you giggle and do the same. 
It’s not something he’s used to — grabbing pieces of cut chicken with bare fingers and slurping noodles without having cut them first — especially not when he’s trying to impress a girl. But he can tell the lack of etiquette makes you more comfortable, and that’s all he really cares about.
He offers you another serving once you’ve finished your first. You decline politely with the mutters of “oh, no, I couldn’t,” but he’s seen your appetite. You could down five burgers at the diner and not break a sweat if you’re feeling hungry enough.
It’s one of those little heart-wrenchingly adorable things you do that both shock and enamor him. But, for a reason he can’t name, you’ve decided that part of yourself was too deplorable to add to your costume.
Steve only scoffs at you in response. He scoops more chicken and pasta onto your scrapped-clean plate despite your refusal.
You’re grateful he doesn’t let you get away with your stubbornness. Truth be told, you were still sort of starving.
He’s just grateful you don’t think his mediocre cooking skills total a complete dealbreaker.
Steve tries to fight you when you offer to help him clean up the kitchen. He tells you to make yourself at home on the couch while he tidies up, ushers you to pour yourself a glass of wine and pick out a record while you wait for him. 
But you have issues with authority and take little fondness in being told what to do. So, in true Punchy fashion, you do the exact opposite of what he tells you to do.
You roll up the sleeves of your pretty sweater and stand next to him at the deeply set sink in his kitchen island. “You wash, I’ll dry?” you offer.
He doesn’t argue, only nods. 
He’ll let you take the blame for not wanting to be too far away from him. It’s easier than admitting his own guilt in the matter. ‘Cause sometimes his heart breaks when he blinks and he has to miss you for the faintest fraction of a second. 
“You seriously don’t have to, you know—”
“Stop saying that,” you scold and snatch the dripping plate from his hands. You swipe a towel over the ceramic with a meticulous ease. “I actually like doing dishes, okay? I do them at all time. I’m practically a professional at this point.”
“Yeah?” Steve laughs, shooting you a grin as he dunks his hand into the warm, sudsy water.
You love that stupid smile so much you’ve started to hate it. 
It’s soft and so sincere, just wide enough to reveal the dimple in his left cheek. The gentle grin drips with so much honey you can practically taste it. It’s so tender it makes you feel unworthy, so full of love it fills you with a distant rage that he might’ve looked at someone else with it.
You have to duck away from his gaze before he can catch you blushing. 
“Yeah. That’s, like, my one chore when I’m over at Eddie’s,” you respond with a shrug. “Because, you know, Wayne’s always working and Eddie’s… Eddie, and he really shouldn’t be trusted with anything remotely sharp or breakable, so…”
“What about when you’re home?” he wonders, simply for the sake of keeping the conversation going, but noting how the mention of home makes you tense.
“Uh, yeah. I mean, considering every time I go back, it looks like there’s been a tornado, doing dishes is just one part of the shit pile that I need to clean up, you know? My parents are usually on some bender — or still passed out from said bender — to take care of the place while I’m gone.”
Steve sees how distracted you’ve gotten as you keep wiping down a bone-dry plate.
“But, uh, anyway. Point is, I think I’m destined to have a career as a professional dishwasher.”
When your gaze flits back to Steve’s, he forces a smile at you.
He’s noticed how you always seem to talk about your best friend and his uncle without ever mentioning your parents. He understands now that it’s because they weren’t your family, not like Eddie and Wayne were. The small Munson clan was your home, it seems, and he fights to steer you back that way.
“So, you stay with them most of the time, then?” he redirects innocently as he hands you a freshly washed wine glass.
“Yeah. I think I’m pretty much Eddie’s personal caretaker these days.”
“Wow,” he marvels playfully, wide-eyed and grinning. “On top of being a professional dishwasher? You’re really doin’ it all, aren’t ya, Punchy?”
“Mm-hmm. I am a real jack of all trades, Harrington,” you joke back with a commendable finesse and flash a teasing smile up at him. The pastel-colored lipstick has mostly disappeared from your mouth now. You look more like yourself.
“And Eddie— he’s got this crazy scar on his hand from when he was a kid, and he was helping Wayne wash the dishes. He, like, blindly reached into the water or something and stabbed himself. Knife went straight through his palm.”
Steve winces.
“Yep. Now he says he’s too traumatized to help do the chores,” you reminisce with a distant laugh and set the glass upside down on the drying rack. “I don’t mind, though. I like doing them on my own. Gives me time to think, you know?”
“I’m standing right here,” the boy beside you scoffs, feigning offense.
“You can be the exception, Stevie,” you assure with a grin.
Maybe it’s the look you give him. Maybe it’s the nickname he used to hate, but now makes his heart skip a beat or two — or three. Maybe it’s all those things and the way your fingers brush his wrist when you move to take the pot from his hands. Either way, something shifts and he forgets how to use his fine motor skills.
The pan slips from his fumbling hands and yours and plops back into the water. The metal bangs loudly when it hits the bottom of the sink. Both of you jump back to avoid the splash.
“Shit. Sorry,” he apologizes, eyes scanning your form to make sure he didn’t make a total mess of you.
“It’s okay,” you promise with a gentle laugh and swipe the towel in your hand over your sweater to remove the droplets clinging there.
Steve scrunches his nose. “I feel like I might’ve just ruined my co-dishwashing privileges.”
“Just a little,” you quip.
You give him no warning before bringing the waffle-patterned nettle up to his cheek to dry him off, too. He flinches at the suddenness of the action but melts into your touch without thinking twice.
“You know, you have a pretty cool scar, too,” you tell him, mostly out of the blue, while you dab at the stubble on his jaw.
Steve’s gotten used to all your abrupt mannerisms and the way you flip-flop between topics with an expertise only you seem to possess. He likes that about you, though. There’s never a quiet or still moment when he’s with you.
“Yeah?” he hums back.
You nod and move down to his neck. “I felt it a while ago, during our Night of the Living Dead marathon—” of which Steve has no recollection. He can’t remember a damn thing from those movies, but can still feel the tingle of your mouth against his own. 
“—On the back of your head. Felt pretty gnarly.”
You switch the towel to your other hand and use your free one to swipe through his hair. Your fingers muss at his hour or more of hard work, but your touch is a far better reward than nearly quaffed hair. You weave through the chocolate strands until you reach a marred, barren line.
“Right… there.”
Steve, still buzzing with your touch, manages a breathy chuckle. “Uh, yeah. It’s a… It’s a really long, really stupid story.”
“Wanna give me the short version?”
The grin you give him is impossible to say no to.
“I’m a super klutz,” he summarizes with a shrug and a sloppy grin. 
He mourns the loss of your touch when your hand slips from his hair. “Well, now I have to hear the story.”
“It’s dumb. Like, seriously—”
“I like dumb,” you assure quickly to stop whatever self-loathing he was about to spew. “I’m best friends with Eddie Munson. I think I can take it.”
“Touché,” he chuckles under his breath. The remaining dishes are left forgotten in the depths of the soapy water when he turns his back to him. He leans his weight on the countertop and grips the edges of it in his hands. “You see, I did this really smart thing when I was a baby where I’d, you know, crawl backwards—”
“Crawl backwards?” you repeat with an incredulous laugh.
“Yeah. I’d push with my hands — beep, beep, beep,” he flattens his palms and presses them against thin air to demonstrate it for you. “Always in reverse. I mean, it makes sense, right? You gotta push to move.”
“Sure,” you shrug. A laugh tumbles from your mouth shortly after.
“Did that until I reversed my way down a flight of stairs and hit my head pretty damn good,” he concludes with a wince. It’s like he can still feel the pain sometimes.
“Wow,” you marvel. “So, like… When people ask if you were dropped on your head as a kid, the answer would be—”
“Yep…” he sighs, then laughs when it makes you laugh. He looks over at you with sparkling cinnamon eyes. “It explains a lot, doesn’t it? I think, like, right out of the gate, I’m super confident, you know? But I’m also a total idiot, which is just a brutal combination.”
“I have noticed that, actually,” you confess with a gentle sort of smile.
“Yeah?” he winces.
“Yeah. You do this thing sometimes where you get all… suave and cool,” you tell him, squinting and lowering your voice a few octaves for effect. “Like you’re trying to be King Steve all over again. And then you, like, trip over a stack of DVDs or something because the universe is trying to humble you.”
“That is a… really good way of putting it, actually,” Steve confesses with a laugh.
“I think it’s sweet.”
“Well, the good thing is, I get a big enough thump on my head, I can change, you know? I can learn. So, I guess I’m pretty glad somebody bumped my head before we met. ‘Cause things probably would’ve turned out… a whole lot differently.”
Steve watches your face contort from understanding to confusion. Your manicured brows pinch together and your doe eyes squint over at him. He watches you break down his words in real time. 
“Somebody…” you murmur under your breath. “You mean… Are you talking about Nancy?”
“Yeah, uh… She gave me a— a pretty big thump, you know? Worse than the one I got falling down those stupid stairs,” he tells you with a reminiscent smile. 
It makes you feel like a total idiot, standing in front of him like this — a carbon copy of the girl that tore his heart to shreds.
“I deserved it, though. I mean, you knew me back then, I was a… a total asshole. And sometimes, I think I still would be if she didn’t, you know… if she didn’t… totally rip my fucking heart out,” he concludes with a sad sort of laugh. “Now I’m kinda grateful she did. As bad as it hurt — as angry as it made me — I think, in a lotta ways, it made me better.”
“Better?” you echo quietly.
“Yeah… If she didn’t break up with me when she did — if I didn’t get that dumb thump on my head — I wouldn’t have changed. I wouldn’t be… here right now. With you,” he confesses, revealing more of himself than he ever has before, to a girl he wouldn’t have been caught dead with a couple of years ago.
He looks beside him at this costumed girl — at you — and he sees someone he probably would’ve given the time of day back in high school. The lack of dark, baggy clothing makes you look approachable — like you won’t actually bite him for coming near you like the rumors always said.
And Steve’s self-aware enough to know he probably would’ve treated you like shit back then. He would’ve fucked you just to fuck you, then only talk to you when he needed you to do his homework for him. And you wouldn’t have been the first girl he did that to either, and the thought makes him want to puke.
He’s glad he’s found you when he did. He’s even happier you met him where he was at, in that awkward in-between stage of growing up where you’re trying to be someone different while still finding comfort in staying the same. You never complained even once when he reverted back to his old ways.
And even though you’re standing right next to him, your chest nearly brushing his arm with every heavy breath you take, he finds himself missing you. 
You’re not you — not without the fun outfits and the crazy hair and all your rings that clink together every time you move. He misses how the metal felt against his skin and the way they’d get caught in his hair.
You’re still beautiful like this, but it’s a strange type of beauty. One that both of you know doesn’t belong to you. You fit into it like baggy jeans or a too tight shirt. You’ve squeezed yourself into a ball to try to fit into a world far too small for you, because you thought that’s what Steve wanted.
“I’d still be that King Steve douchebag… Partying every night, getting drunk out of my mind, never settling down like I…” The words get trapped in his throat. He clears it to force them out. “Like I always wanted to, you know?”
“Right,” you murmur, voice not strong enough to be any louder than that.
“So, yeah, I don’t know. I guess, in some weird, roundabout way, I’m just to tell you that I’m not that guy anymore. King Steve,” he admits and presses his hip into the counter to face you fully.
When you gather the strength to look up at him, you find his gaze already dripping with honey and staring down at you. He’s all soft and mushy and twinkling with the adoration he’s got for you. And when he smiles, it’s so terribly sincere and coated with a distant sadness that’s been playing on the edge of his voice this whole time.
“And I know you might still see me as that guy. I don’t blame you. Honestly, I don’t really deserve to be looked at any differently, not after how I acted towards you—”
“Steve,” you breathe out in a tender sigh. “It’s okay—”
He shakes his head to himself. His eyes squeeze shut when his chin falls to his chest.
“It’s not. It’s… It’s really not. I just—” he inhales sharply, chest deflating on the exhale when his gaze turns back to you. He looks sterner now, but still so tender. “I just want you to know that I’ve changed, okay? I am changing. And I don’t want you to think I’m the kinda guy you have to change yourself for.”
When the weight of his words finally hits you, it feels a bit like being punched in the stomach.
It knocks all the wind out of you and makes it hard to think about anything other than the sudden loss of breath. Like a kid who’s fallen off the monkey bars and flat onto their back, you can’t do anything but writhe through the ache and hope you’ll be back to normal soon.
You got dressed that evening thinking you were the master of deception. You perfected your subterfuge and awaited Steve’s inevitable swooning because you looked like all the other girls he’d fallen in love with. 
But he sees through every inch of your pretending with his secret x-ray powers, and now you’re just a stupid girl standing in front of him, soaking wet with embarrassment.
It’s a little like when he and Tommy and all his basketball goons would make fun of you. They’d talk about you like you weren’t there while they tossed tiny crumbled up pieces of paper into your hair so they could watch you struggle to get them out. But, at the same time, it’s not like that at all. Because now he’s apologizing, and telling you that he likes you, and that you never had to change a single damn thing for him at all.
You’re equally as self-conscious, though, and feeling like a total idiot for thinking you could even pretend to be halfway normal.
“Oh…” is the only thing that leaves your mouth in that moment. Your mind is still going a million miles a minute. You want to blurt out an apology and an explanation all at once, while simultaneously turning into a puddle at his feet and disappearing entirely.
But rather than break down, you stay standing. Too stuck in your head to feel all there.
Steve seems to notice your trepidation almost immediately. His eyes widen and his brows raise and his pretty mouth falls open to let all of his reassurances spill out. 
“And it’s not that I don’t think you’re pretty! You’re— You’re perfect like this too, but I just…” he inhales and takes the tiniest step closer to you, putting an unsure hand on your waist. “I like you the way you were before. And this isn’t… This isn’t you.”
You blink back stinging tears and turn your gaze to where you toe your Mary Jane’s into the kitchen tile. You go to twist your rings like you always did when you were nervous before realizing you’d left them all at home.
“I just wanted to be like the girls you like,” you confess quietly.
“You are like the girls I like,” Steve corrects with a gentle laugh. “‘Cause I like you.”
Your eyes are all glassy when they flit back up to his. 
Even though you don’t look quite like yourself, the way you look at him hasn’t changed. You still gaze at him like you can see right through the nice hair and the dumb smirks and the stupid persona he puts on when he doesn’t feel good enough the way he is. You look at him like you’re in love with the boy he tries like hell to keep hidden.
The exact same way he looks at you.
“I think I just got a little spooked. Girls like me aren’t supposed to end up with guys like you.”
“I stopped believing in that shit a long time ago,” he admits with the shake of his head. “The whole soulmates-love-at-first-sight thing, it’s all… bullshit. If I’m gonna love someone, I’m gonna do it on purpose.”
Steve watches the lingering sadness in your eyes ebb to something sunnier. Your gaze sparkles and suddenly you’re beaming at him, not bothering to conceal the effect his words have on you. You don’t think you could even if you wanted to.
“I like that,” you murmur in approval, then more loudly proclaim: “Screw soulmates! Let’s start loving people on purpose!”
The two of you laugh about this promise you’ve just made to each other without really saying it to each other. It sort of goes unsaid — if I’m gonna love you, I’m gonna do it on purpose and let’s love each other on purpose. That’s what you mean, and neither of you has to say it out loud because you get it. 
It’s that exact realization that makes Steve’s heart flutter something fierce. Suddenly, the urge to touch you becomes too great to bear. He wants to feel you like he did on the couch of his theater room, when a film he could barely recall crackled in the background because the feel of you was too loud for him to hear anything else.
He needs you like that again, on him and all over him. The ache is a palpable one.
The boy squeezes your waist again, as though to remind you he was still there. Or, perhaps, to remind himself that you were still there —the real thing and not something his brain conjured up.
“It’s not totally insane how bad I want to kiss you right now, is it?” he wonders quietly to you. The low, sultry nature of his voice is not at all forced like it usually is when he’s trying most desperately to flirt with you. His words are just naturally weighed down by his desire for you.
You shake your head in a silent promise, then command through a grin, “Kiss me stupid, Harrington.”
Steve doesn’t waste a second.
He’s been anxiously awaiting his chance to touch you all night. He does so now with a vigor that makes you feel all of that anticipation. With one hand on your waist and the other cupping your jaw, you can feel his buzzing skin as it presses against your own — like the static of a television screen. His fingers settle between the strands of your hair while his thumb absentmindedly rubs along your cheekbone. 
The softness of his touch makes you hum against his mouth.
His lips are familiar like home — more than, because sometimes you think you’ve never really had one. 
There’s never been a cozy, warm, and tender place where you could rest your tired bones. Eddie’s trailer, maybe, but it wasn’t yours. No matter how often you slept within the four walls of his bedroom, no matter how hard you pretended like you’d lived there all your life, it would never belong to you.
But Steve could. 
Steve could be yours.
And you wouldn’t even have to pretend either. It would be for real this time.
His mouth was welcoming and pleasant and gentle, far more than you’ve ever gotten out of four walls and a roof. The plush pink of his lips — the cushion of his bottom one you like to dig your teeth into and the rough pad of his tongue that explores your mouth like undiscovered territory — is perhaps the softest thing you’ve ever known.
Even when he kisses you harder and guides you until your back is pressed against the edge of the countertop, it’s still so, so tender.
Steve’s hands migrate to your hips. His fingers clutch the fabric of your skirt as he cages you against his weight and the counter, as though out of fear you might slip away.
Your touch mirrors his desperate one. You cling to him with a similar intensity, balling the fabric of his navy blue Henley in one hand while you waltz through the pretty strands of his neatly styled hair with the other. You let him kiss you the way he wants to kiss you, keeping your obedient mouth plaint for him while he opens your mouth wider with his tongue.
His touches turn bruising, and yours go soft like summer rain.
Steve holds desperately onto you, like any moment he could wake up and none of this could be real. He kisses you like he won’t ever get to kiss you again, having no idea that you’ve already started to build a home in him. 
Meanwhile, your fingers tips trail like drops of water down his chest and stomach. They settle at his waist, on the top of his belt, and linger along the leather edge of it. You’re not quite sure what to do next — if you should wait for Steve to say something or if you should go ahead and take the lead.
Your sudden hesitation makes him nervous.
Steve’s lips click wetly as they part from yours. He peers down at you through heavy lids, amber eyes swimming with honeyed desire. His lips are pinker now, and swollen from being kissed so ardently. His brows pinch in concern. “We don’t have to do this if you don’t w—”
You barely let him get the words out before you press your mouth to his again. Your hands twist at the collar of his shirt to bring him back down to you. You stand on the tips of your toes to meet him halfway. 
“I want to,” you mumble, practically slurring from being so drunk on his touch.
“I wanna treat you right—” he tries to tell you. Some of his words are muffled against your mouth because you find yourself totally unable to stop kissing him now. “—Take things slow with you.” 
You smack a final kiss to his lips. When his honey eyes flutter open again, he finds you wearing a mischievous sort of smirk. There’s an accompanying teasing glint in your glazed over eyes.
“You can do all that when you’re inside of me,” you promise lowly, bold in a way neither of you are used to. The brazen nature of your dirty words is foreign but no less exciting.
They make Steve’s head get all swimmy and his cock tightens as it stiffens in his slacks. His spine tingles with his borderline overwhelming desire for you.
“Have mercy…” he murmurs within a heavy breath, more to himself than to you.
˗ˋˏ ♡ ˎˊ˗
And love, is only heaven away...
Steve’s curtains match his wallpaper.
It’s a questionable blue and gray plaid that you doubt he picked out himself. The framed pictures of sports cars only add to the boyish flair of his bedroom. It doesn’t look like him, though. None of it does.
The only real trace of Steve The Hair Harrington is the poster of Christie Brinkley hanging beside his window, diligently placed right next to his bed. It’s a blown-up Sports Illustrated cover — a beautiful, soaking wet woman posing less than effortlessly against a palm tree in all her blonde-haired, blue-eyed, perfected-bodied glory. It’s the most King Steve you’ve ever seen.
All the minute details of his bedroom make you giggle.
“You have great taste, Steve Harrington.”
He grumbles in annoyance at your teasing as he clicks his door shut behind you.
“Well, you can thank my mom for my great taste, okay? She decorated the place when we moved in, like, forever ago. I just haven’t, you know, gotten around to changing it yet.”
“I can tell,” you laugh and turn to him with a smirk. “Really cool bedsheets, by the way. I mean, seriously. This is state-of-the-art design here, Stevie.”
It isn’t until he’s being pelted with your relentless teasing that he remembers he’s got dinosaur-patterned linens spread out on his mattress.
Steve typically likes to alternate bedsheets in between washing them. His plain gray ones would’ve perhaps been more appropriate for times like this, but they were in his hamper along with another set of plaid ones. His dino sheets may be immature, but they’re no less comfortable. It’s not his fault they just happened to fall on the week you were coming over.
“Alright, Punchy—” The boy rolls his eyes and splays two wide hands on your sides, pressing himself into you rather shamelessly. You wonder if the clothed stiffness against your lower stomach is just your imagination. Any other teasing remarks dissipate from the tip of your tongue as your eyes widen.
Steve notices your silence and smiles. “—You wanna keep making fun of me, or do you wanna make out some more?”
“I think we can do both,” you answer with a shrug, resting your hands along his waist. “I’m quite the multitasker, Harrington.”
“Yeah?”
You nod.
“Wanna show me?”
You nod again, smiling wider now.
He smashes his lips into yours again. You meet him halfway. It’s all too easy to fall back into the swings of things — the desperate mouths and longing touches. Maybe because you’re always desperate and longing for him. And, with the way he’s clinging to you now, you figure he must always be those things for you, too.
You relish in all of his little touches, in the duality of them. He cups your jaw so tenderly yet clutches your hip like he’s still trying to discern whether you’re real or not. Then his palms slide around your waist and up your back until he’s all but hugging you. It’s too sweet a gesture for how he’s prying your lips open with his mouth to slip his tongue inside. 
His hands settle, finally, at the very bottom of your sweater. They linger at them hem, not pressuring you to do anything, just waiting for you to make a move. 
You part from him to abide by his unspoken want. Your trembling hands work together to free you from your top. You’re more than grateful to pry the itchy thing off of you.
Steve doesn’t get the chance to admire the bra you wear. He catches a glimpse of frilly lace, but there’s little time to praise your topless form before you’re pulling him into another searing kiss. It’s full of tongue and teeth now, far more hungry that just moments ago. Your fingers slither through his hair and curl in the strands. You keep him firmly locked against you as his lips trail down your neck.
He finds your most sensitive spot in record time — the one just under your jaw, right beside your racing pulse. Your legs nearly give out when his tongue runs over it. A breathy moan exhales from your mouth before you can stop it and you feel him smile against your neck. He doesn’t comment on it, just keeps kissing you there in the hopes that you’ll do it for him again.
You do.
Steve sucks and nips at your delicate skin, and you revel in the feeling of his mouth. Head thrown back, you let him paint your neck in varying shades of red. Some will disappear come morning; others will darken into souvenirs for you to admire for the next few days.
The thought of him marking you drives you nearly as crazy as the feeling of his lips against you. 
You stopped trying to hold back your whines somewhere around ten of them ago. It was easier, you found, for him to kiss you and to let yourself enjoy it than be hyperaware of all the sounds you were or weren’t making. Steve seems to like it when you moan for him, anyway. Every time you do, he kisses you harder, holds you tighter, and hums out his own subtle moans against you.
He digs his teeth into your skin. It makes you whimper. The desperate, high-pitched noise fades into a lower moan when the rough pad of his tongue rushes out to soothe the bite. He moves on to kiss you elsewhere. You shiver when your spit-slicked skin meets the cool air.
You don’t notice that you’ve hitched your leg up his hip until you feel his warm hand on your thigh to hold it up for you. His fingers inch up until the tips of them rest beneath the hem of your skirt.
You don’t bother to hide how much you want him.
He doesn’t bother to hide how badly he needs you close.
“Wanna make you feel good,” he mumbles into your neck, smiling when his words make you whine. “Can I make you feel good?”
You nod when the words get stuck in your throat.
He parts from you for the first time in several minutes. His heavy gaze meets your own. “Can you say it for me?” he asks, not teasing you, just wanting to make sure you want this. Him.
“Want you to…” you start, then swallow when your voice is tighter than expected. You manage the rest through bated breaths. “…to make me feel good.”
Steve kisses you again, a long and thorough stamp on your lips, followed by several tinier pecks. Then his mouth starts its journey down, down, down your body, stopping only to admire your exposed chest. He’s more than pleased to find that what you’re wearing is hardly a bra at all.
It’s a sheer thing with dainty lace detailing. He figures it’s more for decoration than to push up your breasts. There’s no padding at all. Just a pretty tulle number that leaves very little to the imagination.
You watch him intently with a smile, enamored by how enamored he seems to be by a pair of boobs. You never thought yours were much to ogle over, but Steve presses tender, wet kisses to them anyway. He takes the plush between his teeth, sucking on the delicate skin to leave a blossoming bruise there. He only trails further down when he’s satisfied with the mark he’s branded you with.
Steve falls to his knees with a soft thud upon the carpeted floor. The faint sound is much more obvious in the quiet of his bedroom. He looks somehow prettier below you — soft and delicate and sweet like chocolate syrup or marshmallow fluff. But he’s still got this air about him, something stern and domineering, that tells you he’s still got all the power.
He presses a kiss to your thigh, just above the top of your sock, then several more further up. His fingers raise the fabric of your skirt the higher his lips travel. And, strangely, you’re not all that nervous about being half-naked in front of him. It’s hard to be when he’s kissing you like you’re a beautiful thing that deserves to be touched so tenderly.
Steve keeps pushing up your skirt and stills when he reaches the apex of your thigh, right where the top of it meets the joint of your hip.
Your underwear doesn’t match the bra you’re wearing, he finds. It’s orange all over and spotted with bats — the color has faded slightly, like you’d bought them some number of Halloweens ago.
It’s endearing. Everything about you is endearing. Even when you aren’t trying.
“Hold it up for me, yeah?” he asks you with your skirt in his hands.
It shouldn’t surprise him when you do the exact opposite. You step back from him to shove the thing down your legs, then leave it in a pool of forgotten fabric on his bedroom floor when you gravitate towards him all over again. 
His hands rise to your outer thigh and rub soothingly along the warmed skin. You wonder if he can feel the goosebumps pebbling there. The smirk he flashes up at you tells you that he does.
He’s got a twinkle in his eye when he teases you. “Really cute underwear, by the way.”
“I was obviously very prepared for this,” you retort with ease, making fun of yourself just as effortlessly as you can make fun of him.
“I like them,” the boy assures. “I really like them. Very on brand, Punchy.”
“Would you like me better out of them?”
Your arched brow and knowing smirk, kept caged between your teeth, is met with a bemused gaze. Steve’s eyes go wide at your forwardness.
“Uh, yeah— I mean… yeah,” he nods with a breathless chuckle. Then, more sincerely says, “Only if you still want to.”
You scoff at his timidity, though it’s more at yourself than him. “Look at me, Steve,” you answer plainly, motioning to your half-naked form and the damp spot forming in your underwear. “If I didn’t want this, you’d know by now.”
Steve huffs out a laugh, just before pressing a chaste kiss to the black bow of your panties. He noses at the softness of your stomach while his fingers curl around the hem. He tugs them slowly downward, giving you ample time to stop him if you wanted. 
A part of him is still convinced that none of this is real — you, namely. Truth be told, he’s waiting for a smack to the face and a rant about how all of this was just bullshit.
It never comes, though.
Instead, he gets a sheepish grin and a sparkling gaze as you hold onto his shoulder to step out of your underwear. The giggle that spills from your mouth when he tosses them over his shoulder makes him smile. 
Your pussy is as pretty as the rest of you. It’s more manicured than he imagined for a girl as wild as you. There’s a tuft of hair on your pubic bone, cut down and shaved around the edges. It leaves your lips bare and glistening with your accumulating slick.
Steve’s all but salivating at the sight of you.
“You wanna put that mouth to work, Harrington, or do you wanna ogle some m— oh,” you try to tease him, all amused at how he looks like he’s never seen a naked girl before, knowing full well he’s seen plenty. But your taunts evaporate from your tongue when he finally puts his mouth on you. They ebb into a breathy, high-pitched moan.
The tip of his chiseled nose smushes against you while he licks at the rest of your pussy with a practiced tongue. 
It’s more than obvious he’s done this before. Enough to have become a borderline professional at it. He finds your sensitive button within seconds and with minimal effort. Your legs are already buckling, practically turning to jelly, and he’s only just started. 
He latches onto your lips with a swollen pink mouth. His warm, wide hands wrap around the backs of your thighs to keep you steady and anchored against him.
Steve kisses your cunt like he’s making out with you. He opens and closes his mouth in slow, rhythmic motions, rutting his tongue along your glistening skin all the while. He’s sloppy with intention. Every touch is meticulous. He’s trying to figure you out, trying to learn what you like the most and what makes you moan the loudest for him.
Steve’s attentive. He’s ambitious and ardent. It’s like he enjoys kissing you down there, and not like he’s doing you a favor so he can get something in return. He moans against you like it’s every bit as pleasurable for him, as it is for you.
He alternates his efforts while he discovers you like unexplored territory.
You giggled like it tickled you when he stuck his tongue into your cunt the first time, then moaned when his nose nudged your clit. “Your mouth is so good,” you’d praised through bated breaths, but your whines had gotten too quiet for his liking. He opted to give his tongue a break and latch his slick lips to your swelling clit.
You liked it most when he sucked you there. At least, he figures you must, with the way your mouth parts in a silent cry and your hands dart to his hair to push him further into you.
“You like that?” Steve asks you, just to be sure. He pulls enough away so the words are intelligible, but still close for you to feel the vibrations of them against your skin.
“Yes,” you answer in a broken sigh.
Steve barely lets you answer before he’s licking a flat stripe up the length of your pussy. He slows methodically when the tip of his tongue catches your puffy clit, just so he can see your legs tremble. They do, rather intensely so, and he revels in the way your thighs quiver at his temples.
He wishes he’d laid you down before putting his mouth on you. He regrets not getting to spread you open, to part your soft folds with his thumbs, and admire you the way you deserve to be admired. 
But to be under you this way is a reward in itself. To get on his knees for you, to let you grind your hips against his face, it’s heaven. He never wants to stop feeling you this way.
“Please, Steve…” you moan breathlessly. “Please, please, please.”
You plea like it’s a mantra. Your voice grows tighter and tighter the closer you get to your peak. 
Steve’s not entirely what you’re begging for. You’re not either, really. You just know that the pleasure is swelling. The wringing knot in your stomach is close to snapping. The thought alone is borderline overwhelming. You want to run away from the crescendoing feeling and keep it locked against your pussy all at once.
“Steve… Steve, please. I’m— fuck.”
“You can take it,” he promises, speaking the words into your cunt. His lips smack when he pulls away from you, just for a moment to catch his breath. His chest heaves and his tongue darts to graze his bottom lip. “It’s yours, baby. Just take it—”
You’re a goner the second he wraps his lips around your clit again. He suckles there like his life depends on it. Your hips twitch and you tug at his hair when you come, perhaps a bit rougher than you realize. Steve delights in the burn at his scalp. He groans shamelessly into you, a hearty grumble that rolls over every inch of your body.
You make the mistake of looking down at him in the midst of your undoing. You bring your chin down to your chest and open your fluttering eyes to peer down at the boy below you. He’s already looking up at you, you find, with his own bleary gaze. His cinnamon eyes glitter up at you and you melt for him.
Something about the sight of Steve on his knees for you, face snug against your cunt, and gaze lidded with desire makes you keen. Your hips flex, then still against his mouth while you gush for him.
“There you go,” he murmurs against your cunt. “There you go, baby.”
A high moan gets hung in your throat at his praise. It escapes in a delicate cry when your orgasm pummels into you full throttle. You’re whining and terribly sensitive when the buzzing feeling starts to ebb.
Steve laps at your weeping cunt while you writhe. 
He knows to leave your throbbing clit alone now, but seeks to prolong your pleasure in other ways. He gathers the honey you leak from your pulsating hole with an eager tongue and doesn’t relent until you’re twitching away from him. Only when you’re tugging him off by his hair is he satisfied.
Then he goes effortlessly soft again.
He presses little kisses to the burning flesh of your thighs and runs his palms along the backs of them to coax you back to the earth again.
When your cries fade to more contented sighs and your eyes find his again, he smiles sweetly up at you. Too sweetly. He shouldn’t be grinning so tenderly, not when his lips and chin and nose glisten with your slick.
Steve wipes his mouth with the back of his hands as he rises to his full height in front of you.
“Was that… Was that good for you?” he wonders, suddenly sheepish like he wasn’t lapping at your pussy a minute or more ago.
“Are you kidding?” you retort, trying to laugh at him. All that comes out is a fatigued scoff. Your hands twist in the fabric of his shirt and you lean heavily against him when his arms wrap around you again. “I don’t think I’ve ever come that hard in my life.”
That nearly does him in right then.
He leans to press a languid kiss to your mouth. There’s a foreign musk to his tongue now that wasn’t there before. You hum a moan against him when you realize it’s you that you’re tasting.
“Can I suck you off?” you blurt.
Steve freezes. 
There’s hardly a thing he wants more than to feel your warm mouth on his cock. He’s been hard and aching since the second he got you into his bedroom. And that’s exactly why he knows he won’t last.
He usually jerks off before dates for that exact reason. At least, King Steve did because King Steve knew wherever he was going, he was getting laid. He wouldn’t have the reputation he did if he only lasted eight seconds.
He would’ve gotten himself off before you came around, made sure he was able to last as long as you needed him to if he’d expected you to need him at all. But he wasn’t expecting any of this to happen — especially not for you to come against his mouth and ask to give him a blowjob minutes later. 
He didn’t invite you to dinner in the hopes you’d put out after. Call him old-fashioned, but he enjoys spending innocent time with you. He would’ve been more than happy to cook you dinner and kiss you on the cheek before you left.
But here you are, wanting more.
You never stop surprising him.
“I mean, it’s only fair, right?” you shrug at his silence. “You deserve to get off too.”
“You don’t have to. Not just because I did it for you—”
“I’ve been hearing about your dick since the tenth grade. I’m pretty sure I’m the only girl in the class of ’85 that hasn’t seen it. The least you can do is let me give you a measly blowjob,” you confess lowly.
Steve, knocked senseless at your words, starts working his belt off without a second thought. His hands fumble with the buckle while he smirks at you. “Yeah? What have you heard?”
“Oh, you know. The usual,” you answer vaguely and saunter the short distance to his bed. You plop down on the edge of it and lean your weight on your palms. “Just that you have a monster-sized dick and that Marianne from Soc nearly broke it when you took her virginity.”
“That was a rumor!” he defends as he steps out of his jeans. His shirt goes next. He pulls the thing up and over his head with an admirable sort of finesse, leaving his toned torso and hairy chest on display for you. 
“The monster-sized dick or the Marianne from Soc thing?”
He doesn’t entertain with an answer, just drops his boxers and lets you figure it out for yourself. 
His cock is already hard and glowing a faint strawberry color at the tip with neglect. It curves to his right hip and hangs there, weighed down by its own size. The hair upon his pubic bone rises to meet the happy trail on his lean stomach, trimmed slightly but still a bit wild. Tanned skin, heavy balls, and a singular vein that trails like a river from the base to the head — Steve Harrington’s got the prettiest dick you’ve ever seen.
You don’t even realize you’re gawking at him because you’re too busy trying to figure out how either could be rumors. You’re looking at beast right now, a wild thing that tiny, little Marianne from Soc certainly couldn’t handle. You’re not even entirely sure if you can.
Steve blanches at your hesitation. He sees you retreat into your head and rushes to bring you back. “Hey, we don’t have to… We don’t have to do this if you do want to. We don’t have to do any of this if—”
“I want to,” you assure quickly, eyes widening when you realize how quiet you’d gone. You can imagine how mortifying it must’ve been, for him to get naked in front of you and be met with total silence. “You just… have the biggest dick I’ve ever seen.”
His concern ebbs to a relieved smile. “Well, thanks for stroking my ego, princess.”
“I would love to stroke something else,” you quip with a playful grin that’s far too proud of such a dumb joke.
Steve rolls his eyes but doesn’t bother to hide his smile. 
He wants it on record, though, that he’s not grinning at your mindless innuendo. It wreaks too much of Eddie. You both seem to possess a similar sort of humor in that way, in how you can make anything into a joke — particularly a dirty one.
“Thanks for stroking my ego,” Steve would say and Munson would joke, “Well, we both know nothing else of yours is getting stroked, Harrington, so it’s the least I can do.” And Eddie would’ve been right. But Steve would never let him know that.
The boy settles in the middle of his bed and watches with a glittering gaze as Eddie’s best friend climbs between his legs. She spits into her palm and starts tugging at his hard cock with it. Steve isn’t sure of what to do — if he should rub it in this boy’s face or keep this piece of heaven to himself. He decides on that latter when your lips wrap around his leaking tip.
You’ll tell Eddie about all this tomorrow. He’s your best friend, after all — Steve will be doing the same with Robin, no doubt. And that alone is a reward in and of itself.
Getting him into your mouth was easy in theory, but you quickly find that it’s a harder feat than you realized. Steve’s not just long, he’s wide, and the combination makes it nearly impossible to take him fully. 
You pay extra attention to his strawberry pink tip to make up for what you can’t reach. He seems to like that more than anything else. Pearly pre-come leaks from there and you happily lap up his dribbling honey. Steve shudders every time your tongue meets his mushroom tip. His cock keeps drooling for you, so you keep doing it.
You work the rest of him with your palm, made slippery with your spit. Your free hand anchors around his thigh.
The combined effort isn’t something Steve’s particularly used to. 
Most girls choose one or the other. They either try to swallow him whole or opt to use their hands when they know that they can’t. That is, if they even want to suck him off at all. The foreign attention you give him drives him to the edge embarrassingly quickly.
“Hey, we should, uh— we should maybe stop,” he cautions tightly.
You detach from the head of his dick with a soft pop, but keep working him slowly with your palm. Your brows pinch together with concern. “You okay? Is it not… Is it not good?”
“What? No! It’s not— It’s not that. It’s great. That’s the… That’s sorta the problem,” Steve assures with an awkward laugh. “I’m not gonna… I probably won’t last much longer. And if you wanna… you know…”
“Fuck?” you finish for him with a teasing grin.
“Yeah. Then we should, you know, maybe stop now.”
Your hand stills at the base of his cock. Steve can finally breathe without the worry of bursting entirely.
“I mean, we can stop if you want to. You know, no pressure or anything, but… I don’t mind. I was sorta looking forward to you coming in my mouth.”
And how the hell was Steve ever going to say no to that — to you? He’s never denied you of anything before, and with that godawful track record, he wasn’t exactly equipped to start now.
Your mouth wraps around him again. You kitten lick at his tip and moan at the musky taste before sucking at his blushing head.
It feels good — it feels great — but he’s plagued with a lingering worry. 
He wants so desperately to fuck you, more than he needs to breathe, it feels like. But your mouth is too perfect a thing to deprive himself of. He’s scared it’ll take him too long to get hard again, or worse, that he won’t be able to at all. 
The thought of embarrassing himself in front of you, of not making you feel as good as he wants to make you feel, is an unbearable one.
There’s no way he’s stopping you, though. How can he when you’re sucking him off like your life depends on it? Your hand tugs and squeezes at the base of his cock while your tongue laps at his drooling tip. And on top of all that, you moan against him like making him feel good is making you feel good, too.
“Holy shit,” Steve forces through a tightening throat when your tongue dips just below his head to lick where the pale blue vein fades. His neck stretches as he digs the crown of his head into the pillow, revealing all of the pretty tendons you want to sink your teeth into.
“Your mouth is— fuck… Your mouth is fucking perfect, babe, shit.”
All of his little reactions spur you forward. 
You want him to keep praising you. You want to keep making his legs shudder and his hips twitch and his cock jerk in your mouth. So you double your efforts, just to hear more of his pretty whines that get stuck in his throat.
When you duck your head to pay the same amount of attention to his balls, Steve’s a total fucking goner.
His hands, both of which were obediently fisting the bedsheets, immediately dart to your hair when you suck his sack into your mouth. One warm palm cradles your jaw while the other clings to the back of your hand. He doesn’t push you or force you to take him further — he just holds you.
“I’m gonna come,” he grunts before a groan climbs out from his throat. His head falls back again, but he forces it upright a moment later so he can keep on watching you.
His hips stutter when you hum a moan against him.
“Yeah? Is that what you want?” he manages through heavy pants. “You want my come?”
You nod with his balls still in your mouth, then pull off of them with a pop to put his cock back in your mouth. 
Steve gives you exactly what you want no more than ten seconds later, spitting several loads of his come onto your tongue. It tastes like what had been leaking from his tip, just a bit saltier and far more potent with so much of it in your mouth at one time.
Steve’s thighs tremble around you and hips buck wildly despite himself until he’s given you everything he can possibly give to you. 
He allows himself only a few moments to relish in the aftermath of his swirling pleasure before reaching for the box of tissues on his bedside table. He rises to his elbows to hand you the napkin when his dick slips from your mouth. 
“Here, you can—” he says, trying to offer you something to spit into. It’s a habit he’d developed after the tenth or so girl refused to swallow.
You’ve already wolfed down his come, though, and wiped the excess at the corners of your mouth with the tips of your fingers. You don’t let a single drop of him go to waste.
All this time, Steve assumed he just tasted bad. He figured that must’ve been why no girl ever swallowed for him — not even Nancy, the only other girl he was ever really serious about. And they were together for two years. On the off chance she ever actually wanted to give him a blowjob, he knew her swallowing his come was totally out of the question.
Steve never minded, though. He was a giver more than he was anything else and he preferred most to finish inside. But now, with you, he sees just how much he’d missed out on. It feels a bit strange and unearthly levels of gratifying.
The boy breathes out a laugh and falls back against the mattress. The tissue falls from his limp hand onto the carpeted floor as he revels in his post-orgasmic haze. With his head still swimming and his legs still tingling, his glassy eyes find the speckled ceiling above him but don’t focus on anything in particular.
“Was that—”
“Don’t even finish that sentence,” he interjects softly. 
There’s no use in asking if you were good or not. Surely, you could answer the question just by looking at him. He’s a puddle of a man in the middle of his bed, pliant and at your mercy.
You giggle and slither in beside him, pressing your mostly bare body into his side. One leg wraps over his own. The warmth of your slick pussy lingers at his hip. You prop your head up with your fist while your other settles along his chest, busying itself with the tufts of hair there.
“That was, like, really good,” you praise with a sheepish beam. You wish you knew bigger words that might be able to describe it better. Really good doesn’t come close to explaining how heavenly it felt to come in his mouth, for him to come in yours. “You certainly lived up to all the rumors, Harrington.”
“You say that like we’re done,” he chuckles at your conclusive tone.
Your eyes flit from his face to his softening cock lying limb on his thigh, then back to his face again. You arch a skeptical brow. “No?”
“Not even close,” he shakes his head defiantly. His honey eyes flit between the both of yours. “I need to fuck you, babe, I just… I need a few minutes. If that, you know— If that’s okay with you…”
“You just give me life-changing head. So, yeah, I think I can give you a couple minutes,” you promise with a playful, but not insincere smile.
Even after having his mouth on you, and your mouth on him, you still like kissing him the most.
No amount of pleasure can sate the feeling of having him so close in this way. There’s nothing equally gratifying as sucking his bottom lip into your mouth or feeling the wet muscle of his tongue running itself over your own. You’d be more than happy to kiss him like this until sunrise.
Steve’s hands stay locked on either side of your head while he pries your mouth open with his own. He’ll occasionally pull back to admire your spit-slick, kiss-bitten lips for a moment or two. Then he’ll flash you a smile, like you’re a piece of finished artwork he’s happy with, before pulling you back down again.
You lean just over him, elbow digging into the pillow beside his head as you rest your weight on your arm. That hand twists itself within the strands of his hair, fingers lazing in the chestnut halo on his head. Your other migrates down his body, touching him with feather-light grazes to coax him hard again. 
His stomach tightens when your nails sweep over the thin trail of hair there. His stiffening cock twitches where it lazes along his inner thigh.
“Top or bottom?” the boy mumbles between languid kisses. His eyes flutter open long enough to catch the brief flash of confusion on your face. You don’t stop pressing your lips to his, even amid your uncertainty.
“Like bunks?”
Steve sputters a laugh against your mouth. He pulls away so he can look at you. “No, like— I meant, do you wanna ride me? Or would you rather lay down?”
“Oh. Shit. Sorry,” you stammer quickly. You figure the question must’ve puzzled you because no guy has ever asked before. This kindness is still a tad bit foreign. “I just— I wasn’t thinking.”
“It’s okay. It was cute,” Steve assures with a smile so soft it has to be sincere.
“Um… I don’t— I mean, I don’t know. Is that, like, something you want me to do?”
His right hand leaves your face to find his cock. He wraps his fist around himself, pumping slowly to keep himself hard for you. “It’s whatever you want, okay? Promise. I just thought it might be easier for you if you were on top. So you can take things at your own pace and everything.”
“Yeah,” you affirm within a heavy exhale. You feel yourself growing wetter at the mere thought of being on top of him like that. You nod until the words catch up with you. “Yeah. Okay.”
It isn’t your first time being in this position, but something about straddling Steve’s hips feels foreign. You’re starting to notice that most things you do with him feels that way — new and strange and alarming. Even the most innocent things, the mundane shit you’ve done a thousand times before, it’s all brand new with him.
You twist your hand behind your back to unclip your bra. Steve watches you with wide eyes like you’re doing some sort of magic trick. When you toss the piece of fabric somewhere on his bedroom floor, he spits into his palm to wet his cock.
His eyes flit from his hand, to your glistening pussy hovering just above his lap, to your face. “You can, uh— You can rub yourself on me, if you want. You know, to get it wetter. I don’t have lube or anything. I’m sorry.”
“It’s okay, I’m…” you trail off. I’m more than wet, you’d almost said. That felt a little too overzealous, though, so you settle on telling him: “I’m okay.”
“You’re still on the, um, the pill, right?” he wonders, feeling a bit lame for remembering something you’d said in passing so long ago.
You complained once that birth control made you feel crazy. You said it affected your mood so drastically sometimes that it didn’t feel worth it to take. That was weeks ago. A brief conversation you’d left in the Family Video parking lot. 
You nod wordlessly in reply.
Steve holds the base of his cock to keep it steady for you as you pierce yourself with it. 
Taking his blushing head was the easiest part. The sensitive tip slips so effortlessly into you, just bulbous enough for you to feel it but not enough to stretch you out. It’s a Goldilocks just right sort of feeling that has low moans crawling from the depths of your throats.
Down, down, down a couple more inches and that’s when the ache starts to set in.
His girth stretches you in an unfamiliar, but no less satisfying way. As good as it feels, the burning sensation is a hard one to ignore. It’s like a fire, a distant one. It’s sort of like reaching your hand toward a flame while your brain screams at you to not get any closer.
It’s a lot like that, actually.
Your brain cautions you about taking him any deeper than you have now lest he might totally split you in half.
“Sorry— Sorry. I’m sorry,” you sputter suddenly, a little embarrassed that he’s only a couple of inches within you and you’re already having so much trouble. With your chin tilted towards your chest and your eyes squeezed shut, you refuse to meet Steve’s concerned gaze. “It’s just… It’s kind of a lot.”
“It’s okay,” he assures quickly. He rubs two soothing hands along your hips and fights back the urge to thrust further into you. You don’t see the gentle smile he looks at you with your eyes closed. “Take your time.”
A little over a minute and a pep talk later, you finally build up the courage to sit on him fully. Come, you can do it, your inner voice spits at you. Stop being a baby. It’s just a penis, don’t be such a bitch. 
Your face scrunches when you slide slowly down upon him. Steve expects you to stop and take a break for anothera moment like you’d done just before. He’s more than surprised when you try to take him completely.
“Whoa, whoa, whoa. You don’t have to— holy shit, babe— don’t hurt yourself— fuuuck.”
You breathe out a heavy sigh of relief when he’s finally sheathed within your pulsating pussy. A lazy, lopsided smile makes its way to your lips, delirious with pleasure and pride. 
Both of you exhale faraway moans at the new feeling, heads falling back on their own accord. You’re already more than gratified and you haven’t even moved yet. He’s reaching parts of you that most guys don’t on their best day, making you feel full without trying. Even without his thrusting, the minuscule twitches of his cock are already driving you toward an orgasm.
“Can I tell you a secret?” you ask him suddenly, smiling lazily at the ceiling. 
Steve’s adams apple bobs as he swallows. Then he nods.
“I’m already really fucking close,” you confess with a breathless laugh, face crumbling under the weight of your pleasure halfway through.
Steve chuckles, then groans quietly. “Can I tell you a secret?”
“Uh-huh.”
“I am, too.”
You laugh together and your coinciding embarrassment fades like an ebbing tide. The intimate confessions affirm what you were already more than aware of — that the both of you are just a couple of lovesick idiots who are head over heels for each other and in so far over your heads that you can barely breathe.
You’re spurred on by the sight below you. Steve’s wild hair and amber eyes and swollen pink mouth make you ravenous. He runs his tongue over his bottom lip, looking like the sight of you makes him hungry too, as you start to grind your hips over his lap.
He guides your rhythm with two wide hands on your hips. Your pace is slow, every roll of your hips is experimental, and he revels in every second of it.
You start by rocking back and forth over his lap, then by moving in small circles to add stimulation. When get more confident, you lift yourself up and down over his cock. He’s able to hit your most sensitive spot that way. Steve seems to like it too, because you feel the subtle jerks of his responsive cock.
He accommodates your every move — thrusting his hips in time with your bouncing, then flexing them to reach as deep as he can within you.
“That’s it…” Steve murmurs, mostly to himself. He’s not exactly trying to praise you, but his words send lightning strikes of pleasure to your pussy anyway. He keeps babbling to himself. “That’s it, baby. Take it. Just like that…”
You support yourself with your palms on his hairy chest when you double your efforts on top of him. Steve groans at the lewd sound of your slick thighs clapping over his lap every time you move down on his cock. Your cunt quickly drenches his lower stomach and the small thatch of pubic hair just below it.
You too easily forget that fucking is a marathon and not a sprint. 
You overexert yourself quickly in your attempt to rush toward an orgasm and the effects of your sudden fatigue make your legs feel numb.
“Sorry,” you apologize breathlessly when you’re bouncing slows to a stop. You collapse to your elbows, nose nearly grazing Steve’s, as you swivel your hips slowly over his lap. You try to laugh at yourself. “My legs are just getting a little tired… I haven’t done this in a while if you couldn’t tell.”
Steve smiles sympathetically up at you. His hands leave the plush of your hips to cradle your jaw. He gazes at you with a stern sort of gentleness. “Stop apologizing. You’re good,” he promises, then pulls you softly down to peck your mouth.
He rolls his hips up into you and grunts when it makes you whine. “So fucking good…”
Steve tells you to tuck your knees further up his torso and you obey without thinking. You tuck your face into his shoulder and let him cradle the back of your head with one hand while the other settles on your ass. 
He grips you there rather shamelessly, fingers digging into your plump skin, while he bends his knees behind you. He plants his feet on the mattress and thrusts up into you without warning. 
His pace is already a relentless one, having no need to work himself up to a rapid pass as you had. Being basketball team captain has done wonders for his stamina, it seems. He drills up into you and keeps drilling into you without tiring. 
He keeps you securely pressed against him all the while and you relax into his embrace, happily letting him fuck you in his own delicious rhythm as he’d done for you.
The new position stimulates you from all angles. Steve’s hard cock pounds into your weeping pussy. Your swollen clit catches the coarse hair on his taut stomach with each of his thrusts. Your pebbled nipples drag along his furry chest.
It leaves you a whining, writhing mess on top of him.
“You like this?” he murmurs in your ear through broken pants. 
He’s partly teasing you. He knows you mustlike what he’s doing to some degree because you’re moaning something fierce into his neck, peppering too sweet kisses in between your pretty whines. But he also wants to know that you like it. He wants to hear you say the words.
He feels you nod against his shoulder. “Yes...” You sigh, then whimper. “Yes, yes yes—”
“I knew you did,” he affirms. You can hear the smile on his face. You’re not sure if he’s mocking you or not. You’re not sure if you particularly care either. 
His stubbly jaw grazes your cheek when he turns his head to press a kiss to the burning skin. “Knew you’d like it… Takin’ my dick like a fuckin’ champ, babe.”
“Wanna be good for you,” you confess against his sweat-slicked skin, your voice high and wet like you’re close to crying.
Steve tugs at your hair, not enough to hurt you, just enough to pull you from the refuge you’d sought in the nook of his neck. He finds that your eyes are glassy with unshed tears, brows pinching and swollen lips softly agape. His amber eyes are just as wild, heavy with hunger.
“You are good for me, baby,” he promises and seals it with a searing kiss to your wet mouth. He means it in more ways than one and prays you understand. “You’re so good for me… Fucking perfect, babe— shit—”
His cock twitches in your snug slick when you clench around him. He tightens the grip he’s got on your ass and spreads you wider to pound harder into you. You hope his scorching touch will leave bruises come morning. You want to remember how it felt to have him touching you this way.
“Steve…” you sigh, helpless.
“Hmm?”
“I’m gonna…” you start, then whimper when you feel the familiar pleasure start to crescendo once more. It takes a moment for the words to return to you. “I’m about to come.”
“Touch yourself,” he blurts.
Your lidded gaze widens. You peer down at him, bemused by his sudden request. “Huh?”
“Touch yourself for me,” he repeats, groaning when the request makes you tighten around him. “Want this to be good for you, too.”
He says this like you’re not already in heaven. You listen to him anyway, though, and squeeze your hand between your slick bodies to find your sensitive button. You rub at your clit until your thighs tremble around his waist. You try your best to ride through every bolt of lightning the pleasure shoots down your spine, despite the distant fear that you won’t be able to weather them.
“Yeah, there you go,” he praises lowly. “Keep rubbing your clit for me…”
Your free hand stays locked in his hair. Your grip tightens within the chocolate strands as you near your peak. Steve revels in the ache, groaning into your shoulder when the burn at his scalp spreads. 
You’re already gut-wrenchingly close. You can feel the coil in your belly tightening, a struck chord crescendoing — and then Steve changes the angle of his hips. He flexes them suddenly and his thick cock probes something much deeper inside of you. Something that’s never been touched before — not by another guy or a toy or you.
It’s tender, and much more sensitive than your clit. Your vision strays for a brief moment as a white-hot flame of pleasure makes you jerk against him. You gasp sharply, then forget how to breathe when a moan gets caught in your throat. Your hand stills between your slick bodies as you freeze on top of him.
The wet cry finally spills from your mouth after several long seconds. It’s as long and delicate and wet as the orgasm you gush around Steve’s cock.
The flame burns red hot just before you come, then turns to simmering embers when your cunt numbs from the intense pleasure. You blink, and suddenly the fire is burning blue. The rest of your body becomes a casualty to the inferno.
“Yeah? Is that the spot, baby?” you hear Steve wonder. He murmurs the words in your ear, but you don’t hear them. They sound muffled and far away. 
You hope he doesn’t expect you to answer. You’re not entirely sure if you can form words anymore, or any actual conceivable thoughts. All you can do is suffer through every overwhelming wave of your orgasm that leaves you a crying and convulsing mess on Steve’s lap.
“Holy fuck—”
The boy slams his hips against you with a final, dense clap that sounds deafening in the quiet of his bedroom. Your gushing and fluttering cunt milks his cock. The feeling of your weeping pussy and the sound of your pretty whines throw him headfirst into his own orgasm. His thrusts still as he twitches within you. A moment later, you feel the subtle tingle at the base of your spine when he spits his come inside of you. 
His come paints your welcoming, rippling walls. It’s warm, like the first sip of coffee in the morning or fuzzy socks on cold feet. It blankets you in a sinful comfort.
Steve noses at your cheek while he rides the high of his climax. He rolls his hips slowly into you, much softer now that his cock has grown so sensitive. He clamps his mouth shut between his teeth to stifle his too loud moans and desperate whines. They’re forced to crawl from his throat as suffocated grunts.
You mourn the loss of not seeing his face while you’re tucked so securely into the nape of his neck. It’s a work of art you can imagine so clearly — his pinched brows and scrunched nose and parted lips. But you relish in the searing hold he has on you now, happy to hold and to be held.
The shuddering is slow to subside, especially from you. The aftershocks of your orgasm keep your hips spasming over his lap. Steve groans into your shoulder every time your pussy quivers around his softening cock.
And then the two of you just lay there. You hold onto each other and try to catch your breaths. With the both of you covered in a fine sheen of sweat, your skin sticks together with every tiny movement. The feeling of it makes you smile. You feel like the two of you really are melting together.
Steve’s fingers part from your wild strands of hair and take to tracing the expanse of your damp back. You hum in contentment at the feeling, nuzzling your nose up and down the right side of his neck. 
The moment is melted ice cream and early morning rain and marshmallow fluff. It’s spring mornings on the porch and warm breezes in the fall. It’s a soft and familiar thing that’s still so, so new.
You think you could spend forever here, if you had to. In Steve’s bed and in Steve’s lap and with all of Steve’s languid touches.
But sex is different when you’re an adult. 
When you’re a teenager, you get to be irresponsible. Carelessness sort of comes with the territory. You have sex in a dirty bathroom of a bar you snuck into and don’t think twice about the implications of any it. But as an adult with bills and a nine-to-five and groceries you’ve got to get once a week, all you can think about is how inconvenient a UTI would be.
“I should probably use the bathroom,” you murmur, already grieving the loss of his touch before you’ve even parted from him. 
You leave the safety of his neck to peer down at him. His heavy lids mirror your own. 
“I have this thing where if I don’t piss after sex, I feel like I’m gonna be, like, cursed or something. Kinda like when you break a mirror and you’re stuck with shit luck for seven year— or however that dumb superstition goes,” you ramble, voice heavy with fatigue and lingering pleasure. “Anyway. Yeah. Plus, I should probably clean up, too.”
Steve breathes out a laugh at your sudden prattling but humors you nonetheless.
Somehow you manage to pry yourselves off of each other — you, feeling significantly emptier without him inside you and Steve, already shivering with the lack of your warmth all over him. 
You separate just long enough for him to wet a washcloth in the sink while you piss just a couple feet away from him. The bathroom connected to his bedroom seems to be a foreign sight for you — a least, that’s what he assumes because you rave so enthusiastically about it the entire time. 
It’s all Steve’s ever known, though, so he finds it difficult to do anything but nod along with your rambling. More than anything, he’s glad you’re not as weighed down by the domesticity  of the moment as he is. Because he, for one, feels a little like he’s been hit by a freight train. 
Perhaps spending so many years all alone has made him sensitive to closeness.
You sit on the marble countertop and rest your forehead on his shoulder while he cleans you up. He runs the warm cloth along your delicate folds and wipes away traces of your slick and his come that glisten on your thighs. He pleats the rag and does the same to his softening cock and surrounding skin. 
It feels so strangely intimate, more than the sex somehow.
Steve tugs on a fresh pair of boxers and gives you a faded Hawkins Phys. Ed tee to change into. The loose fabric and baggy fit feels much more familiar than the costume you’d initially arrived in. He might be happier than you are, though, to finally get to see you in your most natural state — makeup sufficiently smudged away and ill-suited clothes forgotten on his floor. 
You crawl beneath the mussed navy comforter of his bed and smush your face into his pillow. “See? The dino sheets aren’t so bad, are they?” the boy teases when you hum in contentment. 
The mattress dips beneath his weight as he settles in beside you.
You smile but don’t open your eyes. “I’m just sleepy… Sue me.”
“It’s barely nine o’clock, grandma.”
“It’s your fault,” you argue, voice dripping with exhaustion. Your skin purrs as he reaches blindly beneath the covers to rub his palm along your forearm.
He grins softly to himself. “Yeah?”
“Yeah. You wore me out, Harrington.”
“I’ll make it up to you in the morning, ‘kay?” he promises, then laughs when you smirk and raise your brows — eyes still shut. “Not like that, you perv. I was talking about breakfast. I make a mean scrambled egg.”
You tell him you’re looking forward to it, to breakfast in bed and breakfast in bed. He falls further for you somehow, despite his lingering disdain for your silly little innuendos. It’s the price you have to pay when you love someone, he figures, like when your crush gets a bad haircut or has shit music taste. 
It’s a quirk he welcomes along with your many others — your rambling and forgetfulness and social unawareness and inability to sit still. All your little idiosyncrasies weren’t obstacles he had to get over to love you, just more reasons for him to.
And it isn’t this one-sided thing, either. Most people would look at the two of you — at the dowager king and local freak — and they’d think he was doing charity work to love you. But Steve’s got peculiarities of his own. 
His best friends are a fourteen-year-old nerd and a closeted lesbian because they were the first two people in his life that didn’t judge him. He chews on the ends of pens and pencils, and his handwriting is shit because he never cared about school. He buys things without ever looking the price tag, then leaves them to collect dust in his room because he never really needed them anyway. He still feels the need to be the center of attention sometimes because the faintest hint of disregard makes him feel neglected.
These are all things you’re aware of. Most of them came with being the wealthy, popular kid from the right side of the tracks. And you liked him anyway — no, you liked him because of them. You adored him through all the heavy shit, and here he was, doing a shit job at pretending to like metal music and horror movies.
“Are you asleep?” Steve wonders after a few moments of velvet silence. He’s still looking at you, one arm propped beneath his hand and the other toying with your fingers splayed on the mattress between you. He hasn’t been able to stop looking at you.
“Almost,” you mumble in response.
“Can I tell you a secret?”
Your heart stops at the innocent question, tired eyes flying immediately open and knocking you out of your fatigued stupor. 
All of a sudden, it’s 1984 again. You’re the weirdo who bites people and Steve’s royalty who’ll fuck anything that walks — and here you are, in bed with the asshole. For a moment, you expect Tommy Hagan to bust out of the closet with a tape recorder and for Steve to tell you this was all just some stupid bet.
It’s a pang of blue lightning, an ice pick to your abdomen, that lasts no more than a couple of seconds. 
Internally, you curse yourself for getting so worked up. You make a promise to yourself to work on all that — the regressing and the disbelief that comes with the not-feeling-good-enough bullshit.
“Yeah?” you finally answer.
“I don’t actually like Dio. Or Def Leppard,” he confesses, finding it hard to meet your gaze  like a child who’s been caught in a lie. He focuses on running his thumb over the irregular pattern of your chipped nailpolish. “And I don’t collect vinyls either, not really. I just… I kinda just said those things so you’d like me.”
And, compared to the web you were just spinning in your head, that’s nothing.
“Ooh,” you wince playfully. “Def Leppard I could take, but Dio? I don’t know… That might be a dealbreaker, Harrington.”
He only smiles because he can tell you’re making fun. “I could learn to like them, you know? If it means that much to you. That’s what we’re doing now, right? Loving things on purpose?”
You capture your smile with your bottom lip between your teeth. Your eyes sparkle at him when you nod. “Yeah… We are.”
“Which means you could learn to like football and Bruce Springsteen,” Steve jokes and shifts on the mattress so he’s closer to you. 
Your feet bump together, then entwine effortlessly. He plops his head on the same pillow you’re using. The proximity leaves your faces no more than a couple inches apart. 
You scrunch your nose, wondering if you should hide your disgust in his playful request or make a joke out of it. You don’t do either. “I could… If it means I get to keep you.”
“Keep me?” he scoffs. “Good luck, getting rid of me, Punchy.”
“Who said I wanted to, huh?”
“You will. When you get sick of me.”
He’s smiling like he’s kidding, but you can tell there’s an edge of self-loathing to his tone. 
Your hand crawls from beneath his own and settles on his stubbly jaw. You run your thumb over the cheek, effectively sealing your promise into the blushing apple of it. “I’m never gonna get sick of you, Steve Harrington.”
His brows raise. “No?”
You shake your head against the pillow, then shove the side of your face further into it when you get nervous. There’s a timid quirk to the corners of your lips and a more sheepish glint in your eye. “You don’t get sick of people you love,” you tell him.
Steve opens his mouth to retort. He wants to tell you that he gets sick of Dustin all the time, but that it doesn’t mean he doesn’t love the little shit. He gets sick of milkshakes and pizza and Cheers re-runs when he consumes too much of them in a single setting, but he loves all those things too. 
You get sick of things because you love them, he reasons, because you love them too hard and you hate how much you need them.
He doesn’t get the chance to argue any of this, though.
“Not when you love them on purpose,” you clarify with a sunshine-coated grin.
That shuts him up real quick.
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untilnextchapter · 9 months
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Masterlist : Criminal Minds
Criminal Minds
Spencer Reid x Reader
* = Smut (Minors DNI) II Beware of the TW please
Basically anything from @imagining-in-the-margins but here my very favourites:
Different dialects (Fem!Autistic!Reader. Spencer is trying to tell Reader he likes her, but it feels like they speak entirely different languages.)
Impromptu (Fem!Reader learns some shocking news when a case lands her in the hospital.)
Fairytales (Dad!Spencer comes home to his very tired wife and even more tired child who refused to go to bed without a bedtime story from their dad.)
Growing Pains (Spencer finds unfamiliar lingerie in the laundry. When he confronts his wife, he learns it belongs to their teenage daughter.)
From @fortheloveofwonderland (check her whole masterlist, you won't be disappointed):
A Memory Locked in the Heart (Fem!Reader, eighteen years ago you met a boy named Spencer Reid whilst visiting your mother at Bennington Sanitorium. This time you are meeting under entirely different circumstances; across the table of an interrogation room.)
Mothers Daughter (fem! single mom! Reader, your mother was a keeper of secrets. She kept them so well, for so long she even managed to keep them hidden from herself. And now you find yourself face to face with the love of your life after ten years, you find yourself starting to wonder if you are your mothers daughter after all. Reunion Challenge)
We continue with the lovely @foxy-eva (all her masterlist is worth the checking, just go go~):
Reflections (Fem! Reader, the kindness Spencer Reid shows to a child seems to impress Fem!Reader a little too much)
Lipstick Stains * (Fem!Reader, the shade of your new lipstick is too much for Spencer to handle)
Miscellaneous Authors:
Any Other Weigh @reidsaurora (Fem!Reader, a small collection of stories about the times Spencer told Y/N about how big their baby was getting every week)
The Lanky Guy in Room 603 @samuel-de-champagne-problems (Fem!Reader, Meeting in the delivery room with midwife Y/N)
A Trip to Remember @dr-spencer-reids-queen (Mermaid!Reader, For three thousand years, you’ve known only what the lake has to offer you. No human contact for three thousand years, yet, always being surrounded by them. Everything changes when you meet Spencer Reid)
Dear Theodosia @violetrainbow412-blog (Fem!Reader, Dad!Spencer stays one afternoon to care for your three-month-old twins and reflects on how much he loves them)
Darling & Dandelion @eideticmemory (Fem!Reader, Spencer is a lot of things to you. Your baby daddy, your lover, your best friend, and a massive pain in your ass)
Friends to lovers with Spencer @gtgbabie0 (Fem!Reader, Spencer needs comfort)
BFF @babymetaldoll (Fem!Reader, Spencer meets his best friend from school after 12 years apart)
Wife @specialagentlokitty (Autistic!Reader, Spencer Reid with a wife who is autistic and when she comes to visit the team doesn’t know what to do until Reid comes and finds her sitting at his desk)
10 Days @boldlyvoid (Fem!Reader, it's Spencer's first father's day and he's extremely emotional about the little love of his life that he's only just met. he spends the day with his baby, Edwin, and his wife, crying and happy about how wonderful new little lives are)
Here for you @weird-is-life (Fem!Reader, 4 times you take care of Spencer and one time he takes care of you)
[Not named] @tinyluvs (Fem!Reader, Being Spencer’s girlfriend and meeting the team for the first time)
[Not named] @ddejavvu (GN!Reader, Spencer Reid and s/o who bites their nails)
Aaron Hotchner x Reader
Basically check all the masterlist of @specialagentlokitty but here are my favourites Aaron ones:
Please help me (Teen!Reader, Reader has abusive parents and Hotch and reader are neighbors and reader asks Hotch for help knowing he’s an FBI agent) TW: Abusive Parents
Safe (Child!Reader, Aaron rescues her from a kidnapping but then refuses to leave her side at the hospital)
As slow as you need (Fem!Reader, Hotch x reader where reader flinches) TW: Mentions of abusive ex
Miscellaneous Authors:
Can't Lose You @reidsaurora (Fem!Reader, When Hotch gets attacked during a case and ends up in the hospital, Y/N realizes she can't lose him without telling him about her feelings)
Derek Morgan x Reader
The first time @specialagentlokitty (Fem!Reader, Dancing at JJ's wedding)
Obsession @dr-spencer-reids-queen (Fem!Reader, You’re a target for someone who is obsessed with you, and so you offer yourself as bait to catch the guy)
Like a date? @dr-spencer-reids-queen (Fem!Reader, Your older sister brings you to her work, and you get a lot more than you bargained for)
Spring Carnival @storiesofsvu (Fem!Reader, Sweet time at the carnival)
Placing bets @cafeacademia (Fem!Reader, Since you started at the BAU, you and Derek have picked up a fun way to get to know more about each other. By making bets, the person who wins gets to ask any question they like to the loser and the loser much answer truthfully. But maybe there's a bit more that just a bit of fun to the bets...)
It's Always Been You @reidsaurora (Fem!Reader, When Agent Y/N Y/L/N gets injured on the job, Derek Morgan is the one to take care of her afterward. However, neither of them expected that him simply cleaning her wounds would turn into a love confession)
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cheesus-doodles · 4 months
Note
Hi hi I wanted to request some kakucho. Poor kaku he’s so sweet but also secretly deranged. Imagine like petting his hair and then turning around and suddenly this man is dagger glaring at everyone like mine! People telling you he’s scary and you’re like kaku? No I think you’re mistaken..like you could do anything to him like put bows in his hair and he’s like :D but the moment you leave he’s like :l
awww yes I support this! Kaku needs love on this blog as well imo, hashed out an entire BFF Kakucho here by accident so hope you enjoy anon!
also mini update, going home will be out next week! cross my heart
Masterlist
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I would say to me Kakucho comes off as someone who needs to be given a reason in order to function in life. In canon, this purpose would be given to him by Izana, which would be to serve him as a king, but when Izana leaves the orphanage to go with Shinichiro and then to run the Black Dragons, Kakucho is once more left without a purpose.
It wouldn't seem like a big deal at first, but slowly as the months drag on, this boy would find himself simply drifting through life, pretty much detached from the ongoings around him - there's nothing for him to really focus on besides physical training now that Izana was busy without him, and Kakucho himself doesn't have any particular goals that he is chasing except to server Izana. Of course, this all changes when he meets you.
You are no doubt a very headstrong person, someone who has no qualms doing whatever you like whenever you like, and would not back down on things that you believe in. And you also treated this boy to a lunch after he helped you beat up a bunch of bullies even though you didn't need the help, because you appreciated it anyway. Kakucho isn't a very trusting person to begin with because of his difficult childhood, but you definitely managed to sway his first opinion of you with that simple act of nothing asking for more.
Very selective with how much information he shares about himself, and you were the same, though you did manage to dig out that Kakucho didn't really have anyone else to spend time with, and so you invited him to hang out with you if he was up for it, saying that he was welcome to join your friend group for study sessions. On the other side of being so stubborn, what Kakucho saw was that you were also just an average student with an average number of friends, and leading a very normal life. You were kind yet stubborn, loved your friends and loved hanging out, and when Kakucho did hesitantly take up your offer for the first time, he fell head over heel for the chance at leading a very normal life, a chance to forget the harsh past he came from.
It helps that the more time he spent with you, the more he felt that he had a new purpose, a new person to serve, especially given how stubborn you were, and there he started his slip into yandere tendencies - you were, after all, the one that gave him another chance at life, a chance to be normal. And Kakucho would cling to that with the same vigour with which he would later cling to Izana. Extremely, extremely loyal, you can always count on this boy being there for whatever you need no matter the time of day. Starts slowly with offering to run and grab coffee for you "on his way" to a study session, and then would turn up outside your house to walk you to school, which would quickly turn into Kakucho offering to do any of your house chores.
All the while he slowly increases the pressure on your friend group to leave you alone, increasingly isolating you from everyone else so that he could keep you to himself. You only needed him after all, you didn't need anyone else - and you needed to focus on him so that he could serve you wholeheartedly. Would absolutely allow you to do anything to him without complaint, and yes, that includes putting bows even though he barely keeps any hair. You wanna hold his hand, sure! You want to dance with him in public, say no more. Want him to run to the other side of town to buy you a slice of cake at the break of dawn because it always runs out? Do you even need to ask?
Once he starts actively trying to keep you and your friends apart is when he starts to dagger glare everyone else around you, but that is as much as he would do when you are present. Because a servant deals with his royalty's issues silently and out of sight. Still a sweet boy at heart, he wouldn't throw hands except when he deems it absolutely necessary - in his mind, he doesn't want to keep you from your friends, no way. He craves the normality that you lent him with your presence and your way of life, but these people aren't your friends. All they do is sabotage you, drag you down, keep you from shining.
He would find you better friends.
Pleases Kakucho greatly that when Izana finally returned to him, and he found that you were indeed compatible and could exist side by side with his king with little conflict. He could serve two royals at the same time of course, but it would be so much easier if the two of you didn't overlap and cross each other - he didn't want to have to pick sides. Would introduce you to the rest of Tenjiku the moment he thinks its safe enough because these people are much better friends than those so-called scum from your school.
No lie, the day you first introduce him as your BFF, I think Kakucho would just melt away from happiness. Izana would be extremely amused.
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nisuna · 5 months
Note
I wonder what about mad / jealous bff yuji who have the beggest crush on reader i just need angry six w him idk why
I'm living my best life right now 🥰🤤
Thank you for your take!!<3
<3masterlist<3
~short drabble~
TW: rough sex, yuji is crazy strong, wall sex, jealous yuji, angy sex, slut calling, manhandling, but really sweet in the end
"You can't go home with him." he deadpanned
"Huh? Who do you think you are, my boyfriend?? Well you aren't so you have no say in this!"
"What if I wanted to be!" he screamed back
"What?", you scoffed.
"You heard me and I'm not asking you because you're being such a slut in front of me right now. Somebody ought to put you back in your place. You know damn well that I can fuck you better than he ever could!"
"Uhm.."
"Oh shut it!!" you both growled at the guy next to you making him leave quickly.
"Oh yeah? Then give me all you got big boy!, you challenged and he did indeed give you all he got.
He's got you in prone bone, smushing your face into the pillows below you.
"I have to fuck the slut out of you"
"Yeah well keep trying then," you lied. Yuji was way stronger than he looked. Under all of those loose clothes was a big buff man, who was nothing like the best friend you remembered. You tried hard not to salivate and moan as he pulled his shirt over his head after shoving you down on the bed.
While getting your guts rearranged you just didn't want to admit that this was the best fuck of your life and it got on Yuji's nerves.
"Enough, I've had it with you." his relentless hips came to a halt as he pulled out of you.
"What do you mean-"
"Shut it and stand up. Back against the wall."
You cussed under your breath as you obeyed. "Don't try anything funny I'm not in the mood." You let out a high pitched shriek after you felt him lift you up by the ass hooking your legs behind his back. You were desperately holding onto his shoulders in his surprisingly steady grip.
"You always talk about being manhandled by big strong men. Let's see if you can really handle one."
You were at a loss of words as he sank you down on his cock, the new angle hitting much deeper. Your resolve crumbled a bit as you moaned out his name right in his ear.
"That's better."
And as soon as he started moving you up and down against the wall you lost all of your self respect.
"Yuuujii~ wait slow down I can't-"
"Oh sure you can look at you sucking me in you just don't wanna let me go. I got you baby." his voice softened, making you relax in his hold as mewls and whimpers left your needy mouth. To save you some embarasent you began biting down on his shoulder to muffe the sounds you were making. Much to your dismay that didn't help you very much as it only spurred him on to fuck you even harder.
You were getting dizzy chanting his name as your eyes rolled into the back of your head. "'M sorry Yuji I didn't mean to make you mad. I've been good right can I please cum."
"Play with your clit and cum on my cock. Let yourself go baby." he grunted between thrusts. Thank yous spilled out your mouth as you maneuvered your hand from his shoulder to your throbbing clit.
You were rubbing it in sync with his thrusts, getting goosebumps as Yuji kept hitting your spongy spot inside. "'M close.. please don't stop", you whined slightly scratching his back.
"Don't worry, I wont. I got you, make a mess of me.", and you swear you never came as hard as right now, pressing your lips against his greedy mouth trying to muffle your pathetic moans. And he ate it all up, his rhythm getting sloppy as he felt himself getting close from you clenching around him.
He broke away from the kiss momentarilly to whisper against your lips. "'M gonna fill you up, make you nice and plump." And with that he slammed his lips against yours, really giving you his all.
He was gentle when he lifted you off his cock and tried to set you down. And he was there to catch you when your legs gave out, hugging you tightly and whispering into the crook of your neck.
"Sooo..can I be your boyfriend now?"
"Maybe."
"Aw cmon!!!!"
"I'm kidding I'm kidding! Sure," you giggled pressing your lips against his grin.
-----
Feel free to send me your Hot Takes as well ^^
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horanghaeluvsinniehae · 3 months
Text
SKZ!BFF DRUNKLY CONFESSING PT.2 pt.1
||BANG CHAN||LEE MINHO||SEO CHANGBIN||HWANG HYUNJIN||HAN JISUNG||LEE FELIX||KIM SEUNGMIN||YANG JEONGIN||
Disclaimer:the beginning might be bad but it gets better i swear!😭
!Also please read my note at the end!
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You were so excited to see Lix because well -the obvious- that you like him a lot and you got so so happy when he said he liked you yesterday, even if he was drunk. You stand by the saying that drunken words are sober thoughts so you believe that he actually likes you and isn’t just saying it.
You cleaned up the kitchen (it was a big mess and it’s almost the first thing people see when they come through your door) and got some tea water boiling because you know that Felix likes to drink tea whenever he’s at yours.
After a while a knock was heard on your door and you excitedly went to open it. A big smile was evident on your face as you opened the door and it got even bigger when you saw him standing in the hallway with his signature brownie box in his hand.
“Hi Lix!” You greeted the boy in front of you. “Hi y/nah!” He greeted you with just as much excitement. “Brought you some brownies!” He held the box up proudly. “Aww Felix thank you so much!” You thanked him and took the box. “Come in please!” You told him and went to put the brownies on the counter.
Your heart started beating quickly as you observed the box that had a note on it that said: to lovely y/nah, i hope you’ll enjoy them!. Your heart was literally melting, this boy is so kind and just amazing.
“Is that my tea that I’m smelling?” He asked happily and already moved to the kitchen cabinet to get a mug out. You smiled and nodded your head. “Of course it is! It should be ready by now but don’t burn yourself please!” You warned him because it wouldn’t be the first time that he burned himself trying to drink his tea. “Okaay. You want me to pour you some too?” He looked back at you as he asked and and you nodded back to him gratefully.
While he got your teas ready you sat down on one of your barstools around the kitchen island. When he got ready he sat down next to you and placed your tea down in front of you carefully. You pulled the brownie box open and pulled it between the two of you.
There was a bit of silence, but it wasn’t an awkward one. You were both sipping your teas, munching the brownies and thinking about what to say next.
“Y/n…I would like to apologise for yesterday. I know that you’re not mad at me and that I was drunk but that doesn’t mean that what I did was right.” He looked at you and had a little ashamed pout on his face. “Oh Yongbokah, I told you not to be sorry! It’s all okay, you didn’t hurt anyone so please don’t feel bad!” You said then shyly added-“and i…really liked what you said Lix…” You looked at him with a soft smile and he immediately returned it.
“So you don’t mind that I like you…like a lot?” “Not at all! In fact I really like you too! A lot!!” You said happily and at that he put his hand on yours. “Y/nah, then if we like each other would you be mine?” He asked and looked at you so fondly that you thought you'd melt right then and there. “Of course!! Omg this is so amazing ahh!” You said, being so happy about what just happened.Felix kissed your cheek shyly and you both looked at each other feeling giddy.
The rest of your afternoon was filled with more brownies and tea, but also lots of cuddles and telling the boys the good news. Of course they all cheered and were so happy for you guys. They’ve been waiting for this moment and got so excited that it finally came true.
A/N: hi guys…um I’m so sorry for being inactive:( i just had no idea what to write, but then i got an idea and i think it turned out well(?) anyways! I don’t care of i sound desperate, but i really want you guys to request because i don’t have much ideas(literally like zero) but i love writing!! So please even if you have a small idea or just a thought or a big idea please write it to me in the requests!! Here’s my guide how to request so no-one will be sad that I didn’t do theirs for some reason!<3 I’m sorry again and I hope this one brings some smiles to you and thank you for reading my work!!Please take care of yourselves and be safe!❤️‍🩹
taglist: @justwonder113 (if you want to be on it either comment or write in requests please<3)
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two-red-lungs · 1 year
Text
I Can’t Hardly Stand It
BFF!Eddie/Fem!Reader NSFW
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Summary: College guys, despite your best attempts, have been leaving you high and dry and desperate in the bedroom. Now, with you back in Hawkins for winter break? Let’s just say your six-foot-something best friend is looking like a real good way to relieve some of that long-standing sexual tension. 
That is, if you don’t ruin your friendship in the process. 
Word Count: 5.5k
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How do you ask a friend to be more than a friend? To lift a foot and place it, however tentative and skittish over the well-established boundary? To enter into a realm of unknown, unfamiliar feelings that, in all likelihood, could destroy that friendship? Crumble it to dust? How the hell does one do that, exactly?
It was a question you had been turning over and over in your head for days, hoping that contemplating it enough would bring you a sudden enlightened answer. But nope. It was still the same agonizing question. You thought it, and in your mind you saw Eddie’s eyes. Big, brown, wet and wide. 
How do you ask your friend to fuck you?
When the idea first came to mind you discarded it like a deer stumbling away from a car on a highway. The thought was obscene. Way outta line. You and Eds… you went back years. Maybe a decade at this point. You and him in fifth grade, goofin’ it up out on the playground in the Indiana winter cold, play-fighting with sticks as swords. And now, him calling you once or twice a month: the connection long and expensive and only affordable if all you said was hi, how are you, that’s great, talk to you later. But NYU was your dream school. He knew that. He’d encouraged you to take the scholarship, to get the fuck out of the sleepy town that too often trapped people in little lives that went nowhere. 
And you did. You did it. Packed your shit and left, moved into a freshman dorm buzzing with excitement and academia and dirty laundry. It was fun. New York was big and loud and alive and full of cute boys to meet. Oh, meet them you did. Date after date, smiling faces, clumsy, heated kisses. 
That’s where the problem really was, see. 
You wanted it. The big sin. La petite mort. And without fucking fail, every single skinny-legged eighteen-nineteen-twenty year old you collapsed into bed with was baaaaad. Like, painfully, stupidly, unbelievably bad. Their breath stank or they sweat too much or they popped off like bottle rockets against your bare thigh after just a minute or two of naked squirming and sloppy makeouts. And that left you alone, buzzing with a deep, red hunger. Unfulfilled, day after day. Month after month. It made you realize you needed something more. Someone you could talk to, tell what to do, share information and words with without it feeling awkward or dictatorial or rude. Someone who wasn’t, by and large, a stranger. 
Your mind went to one person and now you just couldn’t fucking shake the idea. Kept seeing it in your head. Kept thinking what if.
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The plane from JFK landed back in Indianapolis for winter break. Snow was high outside, brilliant diamond-white against cerulean sky, icicles trimming the roof over the pick-up zone in great crystal stalactites. Your breath was fog in the air. And, right on time, god bless him, the familiar brown-and-tan Chevy Nomad van came rolling up with tire chains that growled against the heavy ice. 
Your heart jumped directly from your chest into your mouth. Eddie rolled down the passenger window. 
“Lookin’ to hitchhike, hot stuff?” He was grinning ear-to-ear, brown eyes crinkling. Ever the comedian. When you muddled through the dirty snow and tugged on the locked handle a few times, that grin got bigger. “Gas, grass, or ass. Can’t let you ride for free.”
“You let me outta the cold right now, Munson, or I’ll have to resort to violence.”
“Oooh, scary. Fine. Get in here.”
 He’d driven three hours out to get you, through a small snowstorm and over miles of ice, and three hours back. Not a single complaint. Not a peep. No, instead, Eddie was all sunshine smiles and wicked, warm cackles, asking about your adventures in the city and pulling animated reactions. His rings winked in the cold winter light slanting through the van’s dirty windshield, and his hair was just slightly longer (and drier) than when you’d left four months ago. But he was the same old Eddie, really. Taller than you by a million miles. Soft, broad lips with a sprinkle of new-growing mustache. Bitten fingernails, long eyelashes. A voice like tire rubber and tobacco smoke, which he reeked of. 
Funny. It was easy to downplay how much you missed him when you were sequestered in the warrenous dorms at NYU. Now, with him a foot away, watching his veiny hands tap tap tap on the wheel to the rhythm of ‘Rattlehead’? There was heat in your bones. Lapping across your skin, over your cheeks when you glanced down at his narrow thighs, the way they flexed when he accelerated. You hadn’t considered the what if throughout the years of being friends with him. Now it wouldn’t leave your brain. Now that what if brought new thoughts. New need-soaked mental imagery. 
Christ, you were hopeless. A single thought about Eddie’s legs flitted through your mind and it brought that roaring wall of unfulfilled heat back with a vengeance. You needed a drink, or several. Or maybe a mallet to the head.
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When the Hawkins town sign blew past on the frosted asphalt road to town and Eddie offered you a beer, you leapt at the chance. Especially when he’d enthused about his uncle already booking it to his shift at the plant by now. It wasn’t until you were stomping snow off your boots on his stoop in the late afternoon sun, walking into his shared trailer and getting hit by that unequivocally Eddie smell that you realized the error of your ways. Maybe, just maybe, hanging out alone with the guy you’d been sexually fixating on for weeks in the place you imagined him in the most at night, a hand between your thighs in the dark, wasn’t a good idea. 
Eddie popped the top off a heineken in the narrow kitchen and handed it to you. His fingers were icy from the winter chill, smooth against yours. You hid the way your hand jerked a bit by bringing the drink up to your mouth, not even bothering to set down your carry-on before taking a hefty pull. 
“Two more months and I can buy these babies on my own. Twenty-one, here I come.” He boasted warmly. His mane of hair shimmied and shook as he fought with the cap on his own bottle: it popped off, plinking against the cabinet before escaping to the linoleum ground, and he scurried after it. You got a long lecherous view of his broad, lithely muscled back under his tight Megadeth shirt before he stood up again, blowing hair away from his mouth. “Won’t even need to use the shitty fake ID ol’ Ricky had made for me.”
“It is pretty crappy.” You agreed. Your mouth was dry. God, you two were so alone right now.
“Yeah. I’m, like, genuinely surprised nobody’s called me on it yet.”
“Is Charles still manning the gas station? That guy’s ancient. He probably doesn’t have the energy to call the cops on you when you’re buying a six-pack.”
Eddie snickered and fuck, it was like liquid sunlight, all soft and good. Another thing you hadn’t realized you’d missed, its effects diminished over the phone. “That’s totally it. Hadn’t even crossed my mind.” He leaned on the counter and sipped his beer, looking down at you and tilting his head to the side. His hair followed like water. “Damn. I kinda missed you, Agatha Christie.”
You swallowed, hard. It was difficult to be under his gaze, now. Knowing the fantasies you’d had. Those brown eyes dredged up every sweaty, slick-fingered moment of imagination between your sheets. “You expect me to be surprised by that?” You replied with a plastered-on smile. “The six-hour commute and free beer kind of gave it away.”
He thunked a hand against his chest. “Foiled again. You see right through me. C’mon.” His beer bottle clinked on the fridge as he passed you, swaggering to him room like he was king of the world. “I got a new strain shipment and a ‘lil freebee along with it. You’re gonna dig it, for sure.” He turned around in his bedroom doorway with dramatic fury, a hand clutching each side. “Two words: Purple haze.”
“Lead the way, king ditchweed.”
“It’s not ditchweed!”
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It wasn’t ditchweed. It was, in fact, a nice, smooth smoke. That’s what you elected to focus on, passing the blunt between you and Eddie on his bed, the window cracked just enough to circulate the air but not enough to turn his cramped, messy room into a freezer. 
He was leaned up against the headboard, all relaxed, that smile-crinkle under his eyes near-permanent. Eddie took the blunt from you and took a hit, exhaling through his nose: vapors curled up the sides of it and into his curtain of dark hair. 
You remembered your fantasy from a week ago, about the ball of that thick nose pressed hard against your clit while his broad, flat tongue punched deep into your— you cleared your throat and shifted around, working sensation back into your buzzing cross-faded limbs. 
Well, the sun's gone down, and you're uptown. And you're just out runnin' around: I can't hardly stand it, you're troublin' me! Lux Interior was whining, Elvis-esque, on the record lazily spinning on Eddie’s player. “Okay.” You conceded. “This is good.”
“The song, or the weed?” He brought up a sock-clad foot to deflect your attempt at hitting him, laughing. “What? New York mighta changed your taste in music. Mighta made you forget how good the Cramps were, and shit.”
“You know I was talking about the weed, dummy.” Soft, sentimental affection in your voice was as unmistakable as anything. You just couldn’t help it. Eddie smiled, pressing his lips together and looking away: your eyes drifted to the tendons in his long neck. Beautiful. You wondered how they’d feel under your tongue. 
“So. Tell me about the city boys.” He said after a few moments of comfortable silence. When you groaned and put your face in your hands he chortled. “Seriously! Are they cool? Do they do slam poetry? I bet they’ve got you just hooked, huh. Ridin’ the subway and shit.”
“We don’t have to talk about boys, Eds. I can’t imagine that’s entertaining for you.” 
The metalhead shrugged and took another drag. “Can you blame me for wanting to keep tabs on your bodice-ripping paperback escapades?” He cupped his face, mimicking a cherub. “That’s just how good of a friend I am.”
“Alright, alright! You ham.” You turned that what if over again in your mind. “It’s been. Weird. I’ve met a lot of guys, sure, but. I dunno. They’re not… great?”
“Define not-great. Do I need to kick someone’s ass?”
“How honest do you want me to be?”
“Uhh, mega-honest. Obviously.”
“Eddie, they’re shit in bed.”
Eddie exploded into a cacophony of coughs, thumping his chest and bending away from the headboard. Only when he was done, eyes watering, did he speak, giving a disbelieving shake of his head. “Wow, that was… honest.”
“Hey, you asked.” The ragged hem of your comfy travel shirt was looking really interesting right now. You chose to focus on it. “I’ve, uh. Been with a couple guys, now, and each time, they’re just…” You sucked on your teeth, trying to phrase it tactfully. “Selfish. Like I’m not even there. Like they don’t care at all about me. And I’m half the fucking equation in that— that goddamn horizontal tango, you know?”
“That sounds pretty frustrating.” Eddie, for once in his life, sounded serious. His voice was soft, like he cared. 
“Trust me, it is. I thought about calling it quits a couple of times, y’know? But I’m human! I got… wants. And needs, and stuff.” The silence after your words was deafening, and the record switched softly-playing tracks. The what if came back. And fuck it, you were a little high and a little tipsy and hey, if bringing this up ruined everything, you’d be on a plane to New York in a few days anyway. “You know how you used to, like… joke? When we were high? That it was just you and me, whining about being lonely, and we should just.” You struggled. “Help each other out. Let off steam.”
Eddie stared. And stared. His eyebrows lifted. For a moment you were worried he would be frozen for eternity. “Uh. Okay. I, hah.” A laugh of disbelief jumped out. He pinched his nose and shook his head. “Okay, uh. If I’m, uhh… misinterpreting this, feel free to, like, punch me. Just… full force. You, uh…” God, how many interjections could this man use? “You wanna. Have sex with me?”
“It’s so weird, I know.” Your words were a blurting, flushed, panicked tumble. You hadn’t really registered it until he said it out loud. “It’s so totally weird, and I shouldn’t have said anything, seriously, just forget it—”
“No, no.” He wetted his lips nervously, that pink tongue darting out. Eddie’s eyes were wide. “No, uh. It’s— I get it. We all, like. Get a little backed up sometimes, right? Nothing to be ashamed of.”
“God, you did not just say backed up—”
“You know what I mean!” He ran a hand down his pink-flushed face, hunched forward and cross-legged, close enough to touch. Close enough to feel his body heat. “Jesus. Jesus shitfuck.”
“Eds, let’s just pretend I didn’t say—”
“We could. We could do it.” He interjected. That tongue between his lips again, trapped, a little slice of wet, shining pink. “Um. I, uh. If it’s something you wanted to do.”
Your stupid betrayer heart was drumming double time, making your palms clammy and face red. “You don’t have to say yes because of me.”
“Hey. You’re a chick, and I’m a dude, and that’s like, basic biology 101 so… I wanna.” His gaze, skittish, like he was a timid fawn, met yours for a second and it was like steel against flintstone. It sent a zing up your spine. “It’d just be like… helpin’ each other out, and shit, right?”
“Yeah.” God, your mouth was dry. You hadn’t felt like this, shaking like a virgin, since you were sixteen. You’d laid yourself emotionally bare in front of him. Told him you needed to be touched. Loved. And he’d said yes. “Just helping.”
A beat of silence. Then another. Then another. Eddie leaned forward and then you were kissing.
It was a wet, searing thing. Like a current of electricity was passing between you, hot and bright and so, so unlike anything you’d felt at fucking NYU. He grunted against your mouth, leaning forward into you. Then there was a hand on your knee and god, fuck, fuck your life, that wasn’t supposed to feel good. That wasn’t supposed to feel like your skin was lighting up gold under his palm, and yet here you were. Illuminated by his touch like a celibate. 
“You gotta,” Eddie spoke in breaths, crowding you against the thin wall of the trailer, heat bleeding from his chest through his shirt, “tell me what you need, ‘kay? Promise?”
“More.” You replied immediately. You grabbed at him on instinct, getting a fistful of his shirt, tugging it up, up over his head: he moved with you immediately, pulling it off like it offended him, and oh. His nipples were dusky-dark pink, his pectorals small hills. The skullish demon head over his heart was staring you down. 
Eddie pressed a sloppy kiss with searing lips to your upper cheek, eyes centimeters from yours. Looking at you all gentle and needy. “Can I take your shirt off? Please, I wanna—” He swallowed and his adam’s apple bobbed. “Wanna see you.”
“Yeah.” Your voice trembled like an autumn leaf. “You can see me, Eds.”
His hands were so broad and firm. They rolled your shirt up over your head: Eddie hissed through his teeth. “God, fuck. Fuck me, man. Look at you.” That dark brown gaze was locked on your tits, the way your bra cupped them together. “Those New Yorkers have no idea what they’re missing, man.”
“Eddie.” You said softly. His gaze snapped back up to you, framed by dark curls of hair. “Touch me.”
“Yeah. Yeah, I can, uh. I can do that.” His lips parted as he touched you, hot palms traveling up your ribs, over your shoulders. He dipped his head, planting kiss to your collarbones: it was like you’d been shot, a slow, scalding heat spreading from that point. Eddie held one of your hips and slowly, ever so slowly, eased you onto your back. You knew he could see your jackrabbit heart racing in the veins on your neck, see the way your shallow breaths were so fucking fast. 
When you pawed between you two, sticking an arm against his burning-hot stomach to fumble with the fly of his jeans, he made a choked noise and grabbed your wrist. Eddie was breathing heavily against your face, holding himself over you with one arm braced by your head. “Wait, wait.” He took a deep breath. Hairs tickled your face. “Uh, just. Just wait.”
“I wanna touch to you too, Eds.”
He looked like the words falling from your lips were as good as head. “Jesus— not yet. Not— I don’t wanna end this too fast, and if you keep, haah—” another expletive when you pressed fingers blindly to his fly, down against his dick, “— doing that, that’s where we’re gonna end up.”
With a hum of frustration at being denied, you tilted your chin up in a demand for another kiss: he conceded without a fight, saliva-slick lips heady and addictive. You felt like you could kiss him forever, like this: the curtains drawn, early dusk darkening the room, his skin against yours sending frissons from your head to your toes. You pawed like an animal. Fingers clutching his back, feeling his shoulder blades move under his skin, his ribs expand and contract. 
When you brought a thigh out, knee bending to hook a leg around his narrow hips, he seemed to make up his mind. “Fuck, okay.” He broke the kiss again. “D’ya think— can I take your pants off?”
“Yeah. Yeah, god, Eddie, please.”
Like it was a goddamn race Eddie had your buttons undone and you were helping him shuffle your pants down and throwing them to the floor. He made another noise in the back of his throat and rested himself at your side, up on one elbow. Eddie put a hand on your sternum and slowly, agonizingly slowly, dragged it down. His face turned up to you every once in a while: checking in. Making sure you were still here with him. His fingers caught on the hem of your underwear for a second and you sucked in a breath, but he kept going. 
Feather-light pads landed on the lips of your pussy over your underwear. So light you could barely feel it. They traced up and down in slow, careful circles. Eddie looked almost hypnotized by the fact that he was even touching you: he watched his own hand like it was a magic show. 
“Tease.” You huffed out, bucking up slightly against his fingers. 
That crooked smile returned. “Nah.” He looked at you with affection. “Just tryin’ to make it good.” Those finger pads went up, up, up. Eddie tracked your expression, lips parting gently when your eyes bulged because oh, yep, that was your clit he’d caught for a second. He focused in on that little stiffening nub, snug under damp fabric, and the muscles in your stomach curled. “Ohhh, fuck. You like that, huh? Yeah?”
“Yeah.” You barely eked it out. “Feels nice.”
“Bet nobody gave her any attention at your college, huh?” His words hit you like thunderbolts, and you swore you felt yourself clench around nothing. Eddie’s tongue was trapped between his teeth again. He thumbed your clit round and round in circles. 
“Eds.” Your voice was a warning, desperate though it was. “More, c’mon.”
“Tell me what you need.” Maybe with someone else the words would have come out commanding, domineering. But Eddie was looking down at you with those big wet eyes like you’d hung the moon, like he’d do anything to please you, lips parted all rosebud-soft. 
“Get inside me. Please. Just— your fingers, put them in, please.”
Still laid out long beside you, his fingers crept underneath the hem of your underwear, rasping against your trimmed bush as he slowly pulled the fabric down, down, down, till it pooled around your knees. “Fuck.” He said again, intelligently. “Fuck. Fuck. Can’t believe you’re letting me do this.” A finger ran down the parting line of your folds as he spoke and you jerked like a woman possessed. “Can’t believe you’re letting me touch you, god.”
His finger hooked at your soft, sopping, willing entrance. “Wait.” You blurted. His veiny hand froze. “Two. Two, uh, fingers, Eds.”
“Okay, yeah. Okay.” His voice shook. And then those long, calloused, beautiful fucking fingers were delving into your flesh, just thick enough for a little stretch, a little delicious addictive burn: if you weren’t so hyper turned-on by the sight you’d be embarrassed about how absolutely sopping you were. 
Your walls fluttered around his fingers and he looked like he’d died and gone to heaven. “So warm.” Was all he got out unevenly. There was no warning before he was slowly and rhythmically fucking you with his fingers, the slick squelch loud as thunder. The sight of his broad hand disappearing between your gently parted thighs was... addictive. You held his forearm tight as he fingered you, your grip moving with each slow thrust. 
This was fantasy. This was perfect fucking gratification. Sweating nearly-naked on his messy duvet, surrounded by his quintessential smell, Eddie inches away from you all laid out with a tent in his jeans so hard it looked like it hurt. This was just like your daydreams. Better, even.
You let your head fall to the side, where he was laid out all long next to you. It rested against his chest. You could feel the hum of his hummingbird heart behind the flesh and bone. “Eddie...” the word was a breathy sigh, but it earned him dropping his head over yours, pressing a wild, wet kiss to the crown of your head, leaving his mouth there. He groaned into your hair when you squirmed, thighs shifting, clenching around his fingers. 
“Shit— sorry, hold on, thing is fuckin— killin’ me, hurts so bad.” He muttered hoarsely, pulling fingers from your heat to fumble with his fly. His digits were too slick to get a grip on the zipper and oh man if that didn’t do something for you. You reached across your stomach without a second thought and pulled it open, and hello.
Eddie was so hard it looked like it ached. The head of this fat cock peeked out from the top of his briefs, so red it was nearly purple. It was shiny, smeared with drooling precum that slicked up the turtleneck skin around it. 
You thumbed the shaft over the fabric. Eddie sounded like he’d been socked in the gut. “Ohhhhkay.” He wheezed out. You crept upwards, dragging down his underwear and popping his bobbing cock out. It twitched, kissing his hair-dusted abdomen for a moment. God. You’d never wanted anything in your mouth so badly. You bet he tasted good: like salt and skin and Eddie.
The noises he made when you cupped him, running a loose grip up and down his shaft in lazy pumps, should have been illegal. They made the soft, wanton and slick heat between your legs feel like a bonfire, like an ancient calling demanding you do what humans had been doing for centuries before you. 
You wanted to swallow him to the base. Wanted to stay there for eternity, feeling him throb under your fingers and feeling his fingers in you. But poor Eds was on a timer. And you wanted as much as you could get. 
“Eds...” You trailed off, looking at him, how he held himself coiled-up tight while you touched his dick, like he was focusing so hard on not cumming. His wide eyes glittered in the low light. You kissed him again: quick and messy. “Can we...”
“Yeah.” His reply came out as a squeak and he cleared his throat. “Yeah. Please.” 
“We need a condom.” 
“Right.”
He was off the bed like a shot, shaking the mattress, flinging open bedside table drawers like a mob croney coming to collect debt money. He rifled through their contents with extreme (almost desperate) prejudice. The prize was found: a shiny gold-foil-wrapped Trojan. Seeing him stand at the foot of the bed, framed between your knees in front of you, dick twitching in the air and foil between his teeth? That was a sight that was going to be burned into your mind for the rest of your life. 
Eddie tore open the condom with his teeth and spat out the corner. He fumbled to roll it on with shaking hands. “Shit.” He hissed, the condom springing off several times. It was like someone had set him to vibrate. 
Your hand closed over his bigger one. Slowly, together, you got the condom on: shiny and off-white on his cock. 
He was still huffing like a racehorse. You couldn’t blame him: your body was alight, all active like you’d run a marathon. You didn’t know what it was: it was never like this with other guys. Little touches didn’t set you on fire. Gentle, caring fingers didn’t make you gush. 
With Eddie’s help you laid flat onto your back once more and eased your hips to the edge of the mattress. He stood between them, thighs pressed against mattress cover. His hands were warm on your thighs: kneading them, drifting up and down a few times while he looked down at you, his chest patchy with blush. 
“You sure?” He asked. There was anxiety in his voice. This wasn’t just being handsy. This was all the way. 
“Yeah. ‘M sure.” When he let his cock rest on your pelvis, hefty and scalding, you swallowed hard. “It’s you, Eds. I trust you.”
Eddie bit down on his lower lip, hard, and lined himself up with you. It was only when the head of his cock nudged your slick entrance and your pussy clenched rhythmically in reply, in excited hopefulness, that you realized how true that statement was. 
That’s why this was taking you apart. Not because it was sex. Or good sex. Because it was Eddie. 
He pushed into you slow with a hand clamped down on each thigh and it was like seeing god. The breach was fat and full, heat on heat, no resistance. You both made noises. He fit you like a goddamn glove. 
Eddie swore, over and over, when he got up to the hilt. His eyes clenched shut, face screwed up, steeling himself against the overwhelming pleasure. And for you, that was agony.
“Eds, c’mon, please, please move.” You weren’t above begging. 
“Fuuuuuck me, man.” He groaned out all high and breathless, and then he was clenching his teeth and snapping forward, hips bumping against you so hard it made the fucking bed sway. He fucked you like he was trying to keep you, like he was trying to make this the best you’d ever had: he even canted his hips up, hunting for that spot inside you that he’d read made girls go mad. 
“So good, so wet, god, so good,” Eddie rambled like a lunatic, a drop of drool falling free from his red lips. “So fucking warm, huh, aren’t you? Yeah you are. So nice and warm, warm on my dick, fuck, love how fucking soaked you are.”
You were in heaven. No, somewhere better. Somewhere where sex wasn’t a sin and you were getting your guts rearranged by your best friend, the guy who knew you the best, who saw you, the real you. “Eddieeeee.” You almost couldn’t get it out, breath punched out of you so deliciously with each thrust. “My clit, Eds, touch it.”
He brought a hand to it instantly, fingers sliding through the wet where his cock spread you open and dragging it up in rough, wild circles around your clit. You could see all his dark-eyed focus was on you: fucking you, filling you, giving it to you exactly how you had needed it for so long. Taking care of you. 
Fuck, that thought was gonna make you cum.  
“More, please,” You begged, “so close, Eds, so—”
“God, fuck me man, you— you have no idea how long I’ve wanted to see you cum, oh my god.” Eddie spoke like he couldn’t stop himself, all disjointed and panting over the pornographic slap of his balls on your ass. “Wanted to see it for so long, please, please, lemme see it, lemme see you—”
His begging, his disclosure, his desperation— you went careening off the edge into the abyss while he rubbed frantically at your clit, and you swore your eyes rolled up into the back of your skull.
There it was. The thing you’d been craving, bone-deep, for months. 
The perfect orgasm. 
Drifting back to earth, you had a body made of melted butter. A body made of summer sun and amber. Pure contentment radiated through every single immaculate cell. 
Eddie was still fucking you. Short, uneven thrusts, sweat beads rolling down his chest, long, wild hair sticking to his face. His brows were down in focus, lost in sensation. You lifted two shaking legs and wrapped them around his waist, locking him into your snug cunt. He looked up at you in hazy, pleasure-drunk shock, and then you squeezed down on him as hard as you could. 
“Fuck!” Was all he barked out, and then he was doubling over, staggering forward against your hips, pelvis stuttering. Gripping your thighs like lifelines. He thrust once, twice, three times more, and then Eddie— your exhausted, beanstalk-tall, wild-child Eddie— collapsed on top of you, heavy as all hell. The crown of his head was right under your nose, and you could feel his ribs against yours. 
He couldn’t see you right now. You let yourself smile fondly, satedly, into his hair. 
Together you breathed raggedly, radiating body heat. The clock in the kitchen, past the ajar door, continued to tick. The silence was no longer charged: it was honest, relaxed. Fulfilled. 
“You’re so heavy.” You said eventually. 
“Thanks. I’ve been working out.” Eddie’s voice was muffled in your tits. After a time, though, he raised his head. Propped himself up a bit on his elbows over you. Spat hair out of his mouth. “So, uh.” His lips opened and closed like a fish, awkward and unsure. “Was that, um. Good for you, or...?”
“Of course it was good, Eddie. Obviously! Don’t ask stupid questions.” You replied with mock seriousness: an age-old bit you’d always done with him. A sign that hey, no camaraderie lost, right?
He played along, looking mock wounded. “Well, I didn’t want to assume. It’s not like it went on for an hour, or ended with a squirt, or—”
“Okay, okay, I get it.” You laughed. He was staring at you in that fond way again. The guitar pick on his necklace tickled your clavicle. “I mean... we have the rest of the night, right?”
He looked stunned. He blinked a few times. “I mean— yeah, like, if that’s something you want to—”
“I want to.”
Another blink. The tongue made its reappearance. “Okay. We can... okay. Yeah.” The slow grin began its climb onto his broad face. “We can totally do that. All-nighter.”
“Don’t get cocky.”
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The Munson landline was a little ragged, but it worked. “Yeah, mom, I can’t wait to see you too.” You said into the phone tucked between your ear and bare shoulder as you leaned against the kitchenette counter, hand in a bag of chips. You watched Eddie fight a box of waffles for their delicious cargo and pop four into the toaster. “The snow’s just real bad right now. You know how it is. I’ll get in tomorrow, I swear.”
Eddie slowly shook his head, hands on his hips, hitting the disapproving church-mom pose. He mouthed for shame and wagged a finger. You threw a chip at him. It plunked ineffectually off his bare chest. 
“Love your too, mom. Yeah, I’ll sleep warmly tonight. Bye.”
“Oh, you’ll be sleepin’ warm, alright.” 
“I knew you were gonna say that!”
“How could you possibly know what I was gonna say?”
The two of you returned to amicability, trading jabs and scoffs and sparkling smiles: but in your mind, somewhere in the far back, you held on to what he’d divulged in the heat and fervor of the moment. That he’d wanted to see you cum. Wanted to see it for ages. 
He’d thought about you. Like you’d thought about him. You tucked that away for later. Now, though? Now you were laughing your ass off while Eddie juggled burning-hot waffles with his bare hands before dumping them onto a plate and flapping his singed palms about like a bird. 
So. How do you ask your friend to fuck you? Turns out, sometimes, you just ask.
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