#i expect this to change after my first reread. maybe i’ll determine what’s going on with rickon

[strangesmallbard]

i think my ideal endgame for the stark kids is they all rule winterfell together—one rules in name (bran, most likely) but they all fulfill a critical role in rebuilding winterfell and the north. on a basic level: sansa takes on a diplomatic role and handles noble politics, bran and arya are like a weirwood networking warging spy team, and rickon uhhh runs real fast with wolves and will be the tank in any battle. he’s 7 right now though. i think post resurrection jon becomes some kind of king beyond the wall, helping bridge westerosi northerners with the wildlings.

out of all the starks, i think arya could be the one most likely to have kids; something something building her own wolf pack. if westeros was still regular, all the kids would still be expected to get married and reproduce, but post long night westeros feels post-apocalyptic to me in that previous systems no longer work. surviving nobles might want to put the system back in order but they slowly learn that telling the stark kids what to do is a failed endeavor. they’re making the game now. i don’t think this is necessarily the happiest ending—imagine a room full of the most traumatized teenagers trying to rebuild a country ravaged by ice zombie—but i do think it could culminate all their individual arcs in a satisfying way.

#i expect this to change after my first reread. maybe i’ll determine what’s going on with rickon #he feels more symbolic right now: the oldest stark (a dead king) and the youngest stark (more wolf than boy and he doesn’t remember his mom) #something there you know! #yell.txt

[shurisneakers]

shut in [8]

Summary: When your high profile mission goes terribly wrong, you’re forced to hide in a safehouse with a man you’ve never met before. With seemingly nowhere else to go, you’re forced to work together to figure out who is trying to have you assassinated before it’s too late. (Sam Wilson x Reader, Hitman AU)

Warnings: cursing, implied abuse, death, implied ptsd, injuries, guns, anxiety

Word count: 4.2k

A/N: oh my god oh my god sam stans how are we feeling djkghdfjkhgdf. no thoughts only sam wilson in ep1 of tfatws <333

i also appreciate feedback so if you would like to, please consider dropping me an ask or comment ly guys!! 

here’s my ko-fi if you’d like to support my writing <333

Previous Part || Shut In Masterlist

“Hey, I’m just going to step out for today.” You looked up from the doodle you were making on the corner of the paper. “Catch you later? Just find me if you need anything.”

“You okay?” You automatically sat up straighter, blanket creasing under you. Something was amiss in his body language.

“Yeah, just-” He seemed like he was struggling for words. “-Brooklyn.”

You didn’t get what he was making a reference to until it suddenly dawned on you.

It was the codeword he had suggested right at the beginning of your time in the house. If he was in danger you were sure he’d tell you, at least an inkling of information.

But no, this was for some time alone, further confirmed by the distant look in his eyes.

“Oh.” You blinked. “Take all the time you need. I’ll be here if you need.”

He gave you a smile that didn’t quite reach his eyes, turning around and leaving the room.

You were left staring after him, the drawing you were making of the house layout discarded on the bed. You were working on strategies, vantage points- anything that could help in case something went wrong.

Was it because of the dumb ‘moment’ you had shared two days ago? It didn’t seem like it because he hadn’t brought it up at all and God knows you would never. Was it something else that had happened, something you did?

Stop overthinking. He probably just needs a day to himself.

You had spent almost a month in each other’s company and he had never once complained. He had a tendency to be petty about minor inconveniences, like you trying to watch a movie when his favourite segment on the local news channel was going on. He liked the cooking show they hosted.

He had never made it a point to specifically tell you that he needed some time to himself, much less use the word.  

“Get yourself together,” you whispered to yourself, shaking off the nagging feeling you had.

If he had an issue, he would have voiced it. He never shied away from doing that before and you knew he wouldn’t start now.

You forced yourself to think about something else, grabbing the copy of American Gods you had already gone over once before but were subjecting to a reread. Opening the page you had last left it at, you were determined to distract yourself.

Nearly twenty minutes later and exactly zero pages since you had started, you realised that no matter how much you forced yourself to get into it, you went over the same line over and over again, not a single word registering in your head.

“Motherfucker,” you groaned, letting the book fall on your face. You took a long look outside the window, mind drifting.

It was a nice day out. Maybe some sun would help.

You lifted your legs off the bed, taking your book with you to the kitchen. You could get a nice sandwich-- the same as the last three fuckin’ weeks but you digressed-- a glass of water, and you could sit outside for a while. A mini picnic.

You opened a new packet of sliced bread, taking two out before stopping. You pondered over whether you should make him a sandwich for when he returned, knowing that he didn’t eat lunch before he left.

You thought about it for a good minute before rolling your eyes, pulling out two additional slices to make him one as well. It was just a sandwich. It wasn’t a big deal.

Tucking your book under your arm, you carried your lunch and a glass of water to the patio around the back.

The wind rustled the leaves and the sun wasn’t harsh. The low buzz of insects was the only sound that kept you company.

The air was crisp and you instantly felt better than you had all day in the room.

Setting your stuff down on the bench, you sat down, inhaling deeply.

The book suddenly didn’t seem so impossible to complete as you tried once more, slipping into the pages easily. Even after you finished your food, you continued to lounge about there, too engrossed and content to move.

You didn’t notice the afternoon go by, evening coming and going just as swiftly. You swatted at the occasional fly but nothing else bothered you.

It felt like summer break. At least what you thought it would feel like. You never had one, being homeschooled about things from various people in the organization. There wasn’t a singular, long break. You were just forced to adapt.

You didn't know how to deal with the suffocating realisation of knowing there were so many things you missed out on. It grew the longer you spent time away. You just shoved it away, forcing yourself to deal with it another day.

He comes back when the sky is slipping into shades of orange, a backpack on his shoulder. There was a patch of sweat around his neck and his head was hung low as he walked.

“Hey,” you hoped it didn't look like you were waiting for him. It could easily be taken as you camping out there, waiting for your husband to return from a hard day in the fields.

Sam looked up at your greeting. You noted that the bruise on his nose was starting to change colour but the swelling had reduced from how bad it used to be.

“Left you a sandwich on the counter if you’re hungry,” you added. He nodded in acknowledgement, making his way up the stairs and into the house without another word.

You let out an exhale, feeling a little better knowing that he was at least back in one piece. No reason to believe otherwise other than the anxiety you had developed over imagining the worst case scenarios.

You picked up your book again, intending to finish off the last bit before you went back inside for the day.

About half an hour later Sam re-emerged from the house, your attention snapping to him as the door opened and shut. He had changed into a new pair of clothes, looking a little cleaner like he was fresh outta the shower. He had a sandwich in his hand that he had already taken a few bites out of. You wondered if it was the one you left for him.

You didn’t expect him to take a seat next to you on the bench. He didn’t look at you or open his mouth to talk so you followed suit. You continued reading, or at least tried to, as he just sat there, finishing his sandwich without any kind of other interaction.

There was a strange tension he wasn’t addressing. He instead leaned back, arms crossed behind his neck to support his neck and closed his eyes. His foot tapped against the wooden floor and rather than getting annoyed, you found solace in the repetition.

“They recruited me on this day,” Sam said to no one in particular. His eyes were still closed and his feet still tapped against the ground. “Parents died when I was a kid, I got shifted around orphanages and homes a lot. Finally Ransone had someone pick me up.”

You closed your book softly, setting it down beside you. That’s what was bothering him.

Secret adoption is what they called it officially in the business, but around the organization it was just known as the recruitment process. Every record of Sam being alive would have been destroyed to maintain anonymity.

To the world he just… disappeared.

It was a day that clearly brought with it so much pain. You were too young to remember when you joined, and no one had kept track either. You supposed it was for the good.

It was supposed to be a happy day, one filled with new beginnings. Maybe that’s what he would have thought when he got picked. It’s what you did.

“I’m sorry,” you said, not having anything else to offer. You relieved your memories everyday in your head. Having a morbid anniversary of sorts would no doubt drain the life out of you; remembering one singular day that would trigger the rest of the decisions you made in your life.

He didn’t say anything in return. You turned your attention to the sky, finding it easier to look at that than the disturbed look on his face.

“Do you regret this?” he asked out of the blue.

“All of it,” you replied, without skipping a beat.

“Every single one, huh?” Sam’s one eye opened to peer at you.

“It wasn’t up to me to take someone’s life away.” You were just a child. You knew nothing other than what you were taught; so then why was it so fucking hard to forgive your past self for straying into this. “Even once I realised that I couldn’t leave.”

You didn’t form any relationships while you worked with Ransone. Whoever you did allow yourself to care for ended up dead or worse, sometimes as a cruel lesson to not make friends in the organization you worked in because all they served as were distractions and liabilities. Others were plain scum; people who you knew were using you but you didn’t care. The loneliness hurt worse.

“What about you?”

“I’d give anything to go back and change things,” he admitted. He didn’t have a say either. It didn’t make things easier.

“You regret all of ‘em too?”

“Mostly,” he said. “One of them I don’t.”

“That one must have deserved it then,” you deduced. It was the only logical explanation you could think of; the worst of the worst.

“Nah. I let him go.”

It took a while to register what he said.

“What?” You twisted your body to look at him.

“First mission I ever did.”

His hands were shaking lightly, barely holding on to the gun. This wasn’t what he was taught. Stay calm. Stay calm. Stay calm.

He had already managed to get his way into the house through the back. His partner had taken care of most of it and Sam only had to knock people out. He hadn’t had to kill anyone yet.

But now his partner was injured outside the door. Quick shot to the leg, a punch in the face and he was out cold. Sam was already in the master bedroom by the time it happened. He had no idea about where his partner was, only the crippling fear of being left alone and the nerves from the threat posed to him if this didn’t go right.

He knew he didn’t have enough time. He had only a few minutes to kill him and get out of there before his family returned.

The man itself was sitting at the study table, his back towards Sam. Just pull the trigger and get out of here. It was deadly silent.

“I know you’re here to kill me,” the man said suddenly. Sam nearly jumped but instead tightened the grip on the gun.

“Stay where you are.” He sounded confident.

“I’m not planning on going anywhere.” His chair swiveled around, letting him face Sam. His hair was white with a beard that matched. He was dressed down in his pajamas, a robe covering him. He didn’t look nervous.

“Stop talking.”

“You’re younger than what I expected,” the man observed, not paying heed to what Sam was in. He was a considerable distance away. “You’re not even legal yet, are you? I got kids, I would know.”

Sam didn’t say a word, only lifted his gun up to align with his forehead. “I said, stop talking.”

“I’ve made mistakes. Several, actually,” he mused, “It’s why your boss sent you here. I’ve accepted my fate.”

“Then it should be easy.”

“Oh, it never is,” the man chuckled. “It doesn’t get lighter. You learn to ignore it but it’ll weigh on you for the rest of your life.”

Sam’s jaw clenched. It would get easier. It had to.

“I doubt that’s what you heard, however,” he continued. “Ransone’s a bit… unstable. It’s in his blood, but you- you don’t look like you could live with it.”

Ransone’s history was well known enough that rival gang leaders knew it too, apparently. The man would have been delighted at his infamous reputation.

Just shoot him. Just shoot him and end this.

“What’s your name?” the man asked, taking a sip from the tumbler he had in his hand. “You’re going to be the last person I talk to. It’d be nice to have a name.”

“Sam,” he whispered, inwardly cursing himself.

“Sam. That’s a strong name,” the man said, clicking the roof of his mouth with his tongue. “Are you sure this is what you want to do, Sam?”

It wasn’t.

“I don’t have a choice.” He hated how defeated he sounded. It was a weakness.

“They want you to believe that. It takes away your freedom. I would know, I’ve used it.” The man smiled, setting down his glass. “I’ll tell you this though, Sam. You always have a choice.”

“Stop talking, man.” Sam pulled the safety off.

“Once you go down this way, there’s no way you can escape. Someone will always have to die; either him or you.”

“That’s not true.” He could leave at any time. He just needed-

“You’ll see for yourself.” The man leaned back on his chair, resigned. “But for now, go ahead. I’ll make it easy for you.”

He simply closed his eyes and sat back.

You waited for Sam to continue.

“Couldn’t do it,” he said, shaking his head lightly. “Son of a bitch got in my head and I knew what he was doing too. Told him to get the fuck out before my partner shot him in the face.”

“Does Ransone know?” You were still reeling from the incident he recounted. You didn't know what else to say.

“Holds it over me every damn day,” he scoffed. “Some fucked up way of saying that I owe him one.”

To be frank, you were surprised Sam was still alive to tell you. Everyone knew that Ransone forgiven the first mistake someone made, but this was huge. If it were anyone else, he would have had someone try out a hundred different ways to push Sam to the brink of death and back; having him begging for the release that death would bring.

“He hasn’t ever cashed in that favour?”

“He did. Had me take out the leader of the Ten Rings after that.”

“So then why did you still continue?”

“I did something extremely dangerous a couple of years ago that he found out about recently. Used that to get me to come for this mission.”

He didn’t elaborate what he meant and you didn’t ask him to. You supposed it was a story for another day. This was heavy enough.

“He wants to get rid of me as much as I want to get away from him, trust me. We’re the weird, toxic relationship those self-help Instagram pages warned you about.” Trust Sam to make a dumb joke during a conversation like this. “Probably the only time someone from the gang let their target go and not died.”

That wasn’t as true as he thought he was but you didn’t want to seem like you were one-upping him. You didn’t want him to think you were making this about you.

“You remember the big break you were talking about?” you tread carefully, gauging his reaction before you continued. “The one that pushed me up the ranks or whatever.”

He gave a small hum of acknowledgement, bringing his hands from behind his head to fold across his chest.

“Similar story, ‘cept Ransone doesn’t know.”

“What?” His eyes shot open. “How?”

“I was so tired of him treating me like a child. Everyone around who joined after me was out there doinghardcore missions and I was stuck with petty shit.” You didn’t know any better. You wished you had. “So he told me if I made it through this one, he’d send me on more.”

This wasn’t your first mission. You had handled hits before, mostly in the shadows, from a distance.

This was different. It was broad daylight, waiting behind a wall near the gated entrance of the house for a car to pull up.

A challenge, Ransone had posed, with strict instructions to do it in broad daylight. If you got out of this undetected, he’d consider sending you on more sophisticated missions.

“Highly stealthy. They’re dangerous,” you were warned. “You won’t know what hit you if you’re caught off your game.”

The low rumble of the car outside the gate alerted you of your target’s arrival. The gates weren’t going to open, the guards were dead.

The car stopped, waiting for the path to open up. When it didn’t the car’s engine slowed to a stop. The man in the driver’s seat got out to open the gate, giving you a clear shot.

You took a deep breath, clenching your eyes shut for a second before taking aim.

The body hit the gravel and you quickly made your way to the car. You could see the woman in the backseat gaping at where the man was standing a few seconds ago. She was struggling against the door, trying to escape.

She finally succeeded, the door opening suddenly as she stumbled over herself trying to get out.

“Stay there,” you commanded. She slowly looked up at you, face white as a sheet.

“Please,” she croaked. “Don’t hurt us.”

“I’m sorry.” You truly were.

Her face changed, dropping the facade immediately. She just looked on in acceptance, not making an effort to move. Manipulative. She almost had you convinced

You held the gun over her, pulling the trigger. A single shot. Her body slumped over.

You stared at her in silence, expressionless. You let out an exhale, tucking the gun back into the waist of your pants, stepping over her body to leave.

A small, staggering breath made you stop in your tracks. It was so slight you barely heard it. You took a step back, trying to trace where it came from.

You ducked your head to peer into the car, your heart stopping. Your hand instinctively reached for your weapon.

“What the-” you muttered, facing a boy who looked only a few years younger than you. He was staring straight ahead, muscles in his jaw tight.

The son wasn’t supposed to be here. He was supposed to be abroad, according to the case file. Unless there were two of them you didn’t know about, this boy wasn’t supposed to be here.

“Listen,” you began, but he didn’t look at you. Just stared straight ahead, body trembling. He was scared. He didn’t show it.

“Show no mercy,” Ransone’s voice rang in your head.

“He’s a child,” you murmured to yourself. Your gun felt heavy in your hand.

Show no mercy.

You could only imagine what would be in store for you if you returned to Ransone with some tale of sympathy. This boy was only a few years younger than you. He didn’t have anything to do with this.

Show no mercy.

“Kid,” you called out. He slowly turned his head. “Go on. Get out of here.”

“What?” he asked, voice hoarse.

“Leave. You can’t be seen if someone comes back,” you urged. “I won’t be able to help you.”

“You killed my mom,” he jeered, unmoving.

“I’m sorry. I had to.” Your voice was quiet. Your hand clutched at the hood of the car to keep your balance. “But I don’t want to hurt you. Go.”

When he didn’t shift, you slammed the hood of the car, scaring him enough to pull at the door and stagger out of the car.

You turned your back to him, not waiting to see where he was going. The more deniability you had, the better.

“Did he make it?”

“He did,” you divulged the information you had found out a while ago. It was a messy confrontation to say the least but you got out unscathed.

“And Ransone doesn’t know.”

“There’s no record of this kid. He thinks he was at boarding school.” You shrugged. “Wasn’t going to correct him either.”

“If he did find out-” Sam trailed off.

“I’d be dead,” you concluded. “Being his favourite wouldn’t matter.”

“Why was it such a big deal, this mission?”

“She was a part of a major gang that Ransone was losing to.”

Sam just nodded knowingly, looking ahead again. You knew he’d done missions like this as well. Things like this were common so it didn’t need further elaboration.

“This job sucks,” he let out.

You gave a short laugh. That was an understatement.

“I want out. Can’t keep doin’ this for much longer,” he continued, however, to your surprise. “Don’t wanna keep doin’ this.”

You bit your lip, eyebrows knitted in concern. “You will.”

“How?” You hadn’t seen him like this before, this hint of desperation in his tone that left as quickly as it came. “I’ve tried, everything just comes up short.”

“I’ll help you.” You wanted to, God you did.

“You gonna kill him for me?” He looked at you. “‘Cause that’s really the only way out of this.”

If you were pushed to the limit, if he was on his knees in front of you and there was a gun in your hand pointed at him; would you be able to pull the trigger? Would you be able to kill the only constant you’d had for more than half your life?

“I can’t,” you muttered, dejection making its way into your thoughts.

“I know,” Sam said softly, “I wouldn’t ask you to either.”

You took a moment to observe him. The sun did him good. There was a soft glow to his skin, the colours of the sunset dancing in his dark eyes. Laugh lines were becoming more prominent around them, only adding to its charm.

He was a good man. He deserved better.

“I’ll find a way,” you sounded determined, “I promise.”

You didn’t say that very often. Your word didn’t mean a lot to people in the business, but it seemed to, to him.

“Thank you.” He appeared taken aback but didn’t show it in his words.

You simply sent him a smile, a reassurance. You knew what you had to do, just weren’t sure how.

He was right. There wasn’t a way out of it other than the one he proposed, but it wasn’t an option. You had to find another.

You would. You’d figure it out.

“It’s Cinnamon, by the way,” he said without any context.

You looked at him in question.

“My embarrassing nickname.” This was not where you saw the conversation heading but you were delighted all of a sudden. “My ma used to call me that all the damn time. Mortifying.”

“Cinnamon and Buttercup.” You didn’t bother hiding the grin that spread across your face. “World’s best assassins.”

“If that name ever leaves this conversation, I’ll know who to murder.”

“You couldn’t even if you tried,” you said playfully, nudging his shoulder.

He shrugged, face relaxed. “T’was worth a shot.”

An unintentional pun you snickered at. You didn’t tease him any further, just filed the name away as a memory. Maybe you’d use it later.

“Have you ever let anyone go after that?” You didn’t want to keep coming back to this conversation but you liked having someone to relate to.

“No.” Sam shook his head. “Didn’t want to test my luck.”

“Me too.” One had been enough. You lived in fear for so long, waiting for someone to pull the plug and tell him what you’d done. That fear only grew everyday, finding a place at the deepest corner of your mind to fester.

“It’s what I meant when I said Serpentine had a motive to want me dead,” Sam said, piquing your interest once more.

“Huh?”

“The man I was supposed to kill- he was their old head. He disappeared after that and no one heard from him but it pissed off everyone, right from Ransone to their stupid gang’s janitor,” he explained, your eyes going wide with every word. “So the irony is, if we’re right, I might have led us into this situation. They’re looking for revenge.”

“Holy shit,” you uttered under your breath.

“I just assumed he died of old age if someone didn’t get to him first. He looked like he was one birthday away from the grave anyway.”

“How are you still alive, Sam?” you asked in wonder.

“I’d do it again.” He laughed, a deep one from his stomach.

He was reckless, clearly. Happily and unashamedly so. And if you continued to hang out with him after this was over, he’d probably get you killed in some stunt or two.

But maybe you’d deal with that if the time came. 

He leaned back again, this time no creases on his forehead from stress. He looked at peace.

You sat together in silence. You occasionally stole glances at him as the sun set in front of you, a small smile on your face.

You leaned your head on his shoulder tentatively. You could feel him tilt his head to look at you and you prepared to have him ask you to move.

It never came. Instead, he scooted closer to you, letting you rest against him more comfortably. Your heart skipped a beat; barely but surely. 

A realisation quickly hit you, suddenly before consuming you. Your stomach sank.  

“Fuck.”

Next part

#sam x reader #sam wilson x reader #mcu fic #sam fic #sam wilson fic #sam wilson fluff #sam wilson angst #sam wilson series #falcon #falcon x reader #the falcon x reader #hitman!sam wilson #hitman!au #shut in fic #marvel fic #marvel #mcu #sam wilson #the falcon #sam wilson fanfiction #marvel imagine #marvel fanfiction #sam wilson imagine #sam imagine

[official-weasley]

Meant to Be (Charlie Weasley x OC)

What happens when Bill brings home a girl and Charlie is completely awestruck by her?

WARNINGS: curse words, angst

Chapter 11

Charlie

I woke up the next morning wishing I was dreaming. I felt like not getting out of bed at all but I will not allow my feelings to interfere with my job. It was the only good thing I had going for me now that I lost all hope of ever being more than friends with Rhylee.

I got up and thanked Merlin when I saw that it was cloudy. If I would go to watch the sunrise and she would be there, I don’t know what I would do. I was so upset last night that I forgot to check my team’s schedule for the next month.

I was still determined to fix my relationship with Bill. I simply have to. It’s time to return to my roots. Being grateful for my job and being the best sibling I can be. That’s what I was all about before I met Rhylee and my world turned upside down.

I sighed and got out of bed. I sat down at the kitchen table, the timetable in front of me. Theo has two days off this week and so does Evan. John and Andrew are free the week after that. And then I could take time off when Rhylee comes back. It was hard to be two people short at once during mating season so we had to plan accordingly.

It’s settled then, I will go and visit Bill at work in three weeks. Hopefully, he won’t slam the door in my face. I still can’t believe what an idiot I am. I really messed up.

I decided to go to the nearby village and check out their library for books I could give Rhylee for her case. I didn’t want to be a part of it anymore but I didn’t want to show her how much she hurt me either. The sooner it’s over the better. And I wanted to help the dragon. I don’t want a single one to be executed if there is anything I can do to prevent it.

I could apparate to the library but I decided to walk instead. It’s supposed to be my day off anyway and why not take it for once. I don’t remember the last time I had a day off and if last night isn’t good enough of a reason for me to take a little break then I don’t know what is.

My mind was completely blank walking there. I didn’t have the energy to think about anything. Every time Rhylee or last night came to mind I tried to shake it off. I can’t think about it because it breaks my heart all over again and I can’t keep doing this to myself.

I only had a broken heart once before. It was when Emma and I broke up the summer after we graduated from Hogwarts. We started dating a month before our sixth year and we were very happy together. She was my first love and I wouldn’t change a thing. When I found out I got a job at the Sanctuary we started to talk about our future. She applied for a position to be the Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher at Ilvermony and when she got her letter we knew it will be very difficult for us to see each other.

We both started right after graduation and we barely had the time to write to each other during summer. I was busy learning, getting acquainted with all the dragons, and getting assimilated to the working schedule and she had to train all summer and prepare to start the semester in September. When we finally had a chance to see each other in August, we both knew it’s not going to work out no matter how much we would like to try long-distance.

We agreed that it’s better if we go our separate ways and broke up. The only time we communicate now is when we send each other a birthday card.

It hurt, letting her go, but at least I had a choice. At least I knew what I was doing and I had a clean slate. This was nothing like it and it terrified me that I was still so attracted to Rhylee even though I don’t know what she was playing at. It’s like I just can’t let her go.

I spend a few hours in the library, going through books, making notes, trying to think of anything that might provide evidence of the dragon’s innocence. I was glad I decided to go. It was a good distraction and I forgot just how much I love reading, checking facts, and learning something new, especially if it had to do with dragons and other creatures.

I found a book on creature trials and one called Dragons and the Law. I decided to give them to Rhylee so she could see if they could be of any help. I dreaded not knowing when the trial is going to happen because it meant I didn’t know for how long I will have to pretend that I am okay with us being friends. I was planning on distancing myself from her as soon as everything is over.

Besides those two books, I took a few for myself. If I wanted to find myself again, I have to start reading as I used to. It made me happy and I think I will need a lot of those moments if I’ll be working alongside Rhylee for what can be the rest of my life.

I went for a run when I came back and paid Ernie a visit. His positivity and cheerfulness were something I needed to surround myself with. I don’t think I ever spent so much time in his office but damn he made me laugh. He gave me a letter from my mum and Ron and a package from Fred and George. At this point, I wasn’t even expecting anything from Bill.

I am glad that I’ve opened mum’s letter first as she warned me that the twins might send me something from their newly opened shop. They did it! They finally did it! They told me about it in one of their letters and made me swear I wouldn’t tell mum. I wanted to give them some money as I supported their dream but they said they are well taken care of.

I have no idea where they got the money from but I just wanted to be there for them. It made me feel good to be a good older brother to at least 2 of my siblings.

Because I was so ecstatic for them I decided to open the gift they sent me anyway. I carefully unwrapped it and slowly removed the cover with my eyes narrowed and my head leaned back just in case something would jump out. I have learned through the years that with them, you have to be prepared for anything.

It looked like candy. They were joking, right? I took it out of the box and found a little note at the bottom.

Something to prank your mates with.

Thank you for being on our side, Charlie.

Love, Fred and George

I felt like crying. I know to them it was a simple gesture but this meant so much to me. It was right what I needed. At least I did something right. It warmed my heart that they felt supported by me and I couldn’t wait to visit their shop.

Something to prank my mates with, huh?

I picked up one of the wrappers. It looked like regular candy. I squinted my eyes to read the label.

Ton-Tongue Toffee.

That didn’t sound so bad. If it wasn’t their invention I would dare trying it but I knew better. Perhaps I will give one to Theo. He always liked to talk too much, maybe these could fix that.

I spent the rest of the day reading on the sofa. Merlin’s beard did I miss it. How could I not have an entire wall of books in my home? I need to write to Hagrid if he still has that one book about dragons he used to lend me when I was still in school. I would love to reread it and I loved the illustrations in it.

When I finally tore my eyes off the book to check the time, I couldn’t believe it was time for dinner already. I decided to put on some clothes.

Yes, I was reading naked.

I live alone and I felt like it and there’s nothing anyone can do about it.

It was the new Charlie!

I tucked the books for Rhylee under my arm and exited my hut.

I knocked on her door and the second I did I heard movement inside.

“Charlie, hi.” She looked even more upset than she did yesterday.

The dark circles under her eyes indicated that she slept almost as little as I did.

“I don’t want to bother you.” I started. I saw something shift in her eyes. “I was in the library this morning and found these two books that I reckon could help you with the case.” I explained.

I couldn’t believe how calm I was. I don’t know if it was because I was still mad at her or I simply didn’t have the energy to care anymore. My heart was still bumping against my rib cage but it was easier to ignore it this time.

“Thank you.” She carefully took the books from my hands, her eyes on mine.

I hated the way she was looking at me. As if she was sorry. As if she felt bad for what happened last night. I hated that I could read her like a book and I hated how much I wanted to ask her what’s wrong and why is she so upset as it was clear, something was going on in her life.

We might be friends but I can’t be there for her right now. I have to get my life in order first. I have to take care of myself and my family. As much as I wanted to, I can’t make her a priority again because I know the second I do, I will fall right back in and I can’t trust myself with getting out.

And she has Nick for that, right?

“Want to come in?” She said as she went to put the books on her coffee table.

“No. I’m going to go have dinner with the guys.” My voice was completely emotionless.

“Oh. Okay.”

Don’t sound so disappointed, Rhylee. You don’t get to sound like that. I can’t feel sorry for you.

“Look, about last night…”

“Don’t.” I shook my head.

I don’t want to talk about it ever again. Especially not with her.

“It’s okay. I understand.” I smiled awkwardly as I didn’t know what else to do.

“It’s just…” She bit her lip and bowed her head. “I…”

“Look, Rhylee. It’s really not a big deal.”

It was but okay.

“I have to go, they are waiting for me.” Without waiting another second I turned around and walked away.

Fuck, why was it so hard! I just left her standing there in the doorway. It was killing me but I knew it was the right thing to do…for me at least.

I sat next to Andrew and started eating my dinner. I just remembered that I haven’t eaten at all today. They were all waiting for me to say something but I pretended I was too busy eating to notice.

“Charlie, we’re sorry about yesterday.” Evan was the first to speak.

“Yeah, it wasn’t our business and we shouldn’t have told you to go and see her.” John followed.

“It’s okay. I’m glad you did it.” I mumbled with my mouth full.

“You are?” Theo looked puzzled.

“Yeah.” I finally swallowed the food. “If you didn’t I don’t know when I would make a move and it already took too long for me to find out she was dating someone.”

“I still can't believe it.” Andrew shook his head. “I know she’s very private but one might think you would mention your partner at least once.” They all nodded in agreement.

“Or at least that she would tell you.” Peter spoke for the first time.

“Why me?” I looked up at him.

“Well, you’re better friends with her than we are. You went running together and you trained her and…you have history.” The lot nodded their heads again.

“Doesn’t matter now, does it?” I tried not to sound too disappointed.

“We’re sorry, Charlie.” Evan said gently.

“We promise, we won't mention it again.” Andrew put a hand on my shoulder and squeezed it.

“Thanks.” I really appreciated that they understood and didn’t press the matter further.

I couldn’t be angry with them. They only wanted me to be happy and they couldn’t know it would turn out so bad. I definitely didn’t expect it.

“What are you going to do now?” Theo asked after a brief pause.

“I’m going to talk to Bill.” I put my fork down. “Rhylee told him that we slept together so that confirms why he hasn’t been writing to me for so long. I haven’t seen him in two years and I can’t believe I let this happen.” I pressed my fingers to my temples.

“Charlie, everybody makes mistakes. You’re only human.” Peter said slowly.

“Do you think he’ll be able to forgive me after such a long time?” I lifted my head.

“Get off it, Charlie!” Theo slammed the table with his fist. “He’s your brother. Of course, he will!”

I wish I had Theodore’s confidence in that. Bill is the nicest, sweetest guy I know and he didn’t hold a grudge against anybody.

But two years!

I would kick my arse if I was him. And then I would heal myself and do it again.

“Peter, I will take two days off in three weeks to go and see him.” I remembered that I have to tell him if I leave the Sanctuary.

We could take a day or two off if we scheduled it in advance without saying anything like I did today. But if you plan on being outside of the Reserve we had to tell Peter so that he knew that if anything goes wrong or if he would need another pair of hands that he can’t come and knock on your door for you to help.

“Charlie, if you want we can switch days and you can go in two days.” Theo offered.

“That’s very nice of you, mate.” I smiled.

That meant a lot to me.

“But I have to figure out what to say to him anyways and I need to find a way to ask one of my siblings to tell me where to find him. I don’t want mum to know that we aren’t talking. It’s a miracle I was able to keep it a secret for such a long time anyway.”

“In three weeks it is.” Peter made a mental note.

“You’re going to be fine, Charlie.” John said. “Just give it time.”

“Yeah, I know.” I sighed.

First I get my brother back and then I’ll focus on mending my heart.

#harry potter fanfiction #charlie weasley #charlie weasley fanfiction #the weasleys #weasley family #hp imagine #charlie weasley x oc #charlie weasley imagine #the burrow #harry potter imagine #weasley fanfiction #charlie weasley x mc #bill weasley #harry potter #wizarding world

[multisfabulis]

Wayfinder’s Voyage

Oceanic (Chapter 1 | 2)

Word Count: 5785

I hope everyone enjoyed reading this! I'm honestly super anxious while I'm typing this because, not only is this my first fic in the KH fandom, this is also my first ship fic so I'm feeling a lot of pressure.

I want to apologize if the characters seem OOC in this, I was mainly going off of memory and a Wiki because I didn't want to sit through an entire LP of BBS just to get a few details accurate. It already took me a month and a half to write all of this and I didn't want to take up more time.

I do have more Terraqua fics in the works, as well as a couple other KH fics in general, but those will probably be posted way later. I just wanted to test the waters with this fic and see how I do so...

So some things to note:

*Both Aqua and Terra's first scenes in this fic were made entirely for the purpose of giving them build-up while not diminishing Ven's importance to them. I was already going to be fucking with canon a lot but I also didn't want to leave Ven to the wayside so I created those scenes. You'll see Terra's in the next chapter.

*I feel the need to apologize for the second half of the second scene because that still feels like word barf, even when I know why I wrote it like that. I hope the intention behind those words is still conveyed clearly but I'll understand if it's not.

*As for the last scene, I completely misremembered the sequence of events leading up to the end. I already knew that scene was going to be changed somewhat just for the context of the ship but I think it's pretty clear which parts I changed on purpose and which parts I was winging it. It's been years since I last watched that scene, it was super late into the night, this was my third rewrite, and I felt satisfied with my work before realizing I fucked up and decided to go along with it.

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     Today started out like any other normal day. Aqua woke up, did her morning regimen, and set off for the great hall to begin her studies. She and Terra, her friend/rival, were to train under the watchful eye of their master Eraqus in the hopes of coming one step closer to fulfilling their lifelong dream. They would one day surpass the rank of apprentice and become Keyblade Masters in their own right, something she wished would arrive sooner rather than later.

     Then came time for their daily duel. They would often spar with each other as a way of proving their capabilities in battle, seeing what areas they could use improvement in, and showing off the techniques they had learned from past fights. This seemed to be no different from their previous clashes.

     She was on the defense, blocking and deflecting each blow Terra threw her way with relative ease. He managed to find an opening she didn’t account for and all but jumped on the opportunity. He charged in, his Keyblade held high, and she only had a split second to raise hers in an attempt to guard against it. Yet, whether it was due to a miscalculation on his part or her just reacting too slow, he ended up hitting her unarmored wrist. She quickly backed away, letting out a cry of pain as both Keyblades were dismissed in a flash of light. Eraqus rushed over to check if she was okay.

     Terra was beside her with remorseful apologies spilling out of his mouth but she barely paid them any heed. Her eyes were focused on something much more alarming, something she knew Eraqus saw too. Emanating from Terra’s hand was an aura of Darkness, which vanished as soon as he noticed it. He tried to defend himself to Eraqus but the damage was already done.

     Their master had an almost zealous hatred for Darkness, believing it’d bring nothing but destruction in its wake, and sought to rid the Land of Departure of any, even if some laid dormant in his apprentices’ hearts. This was a constant problem for Terra, who always seemed to harbor enough to fall back on, be it consciously or not. For it to flare up during training, that drew Eraqus’s ire.

     It was hard not to feel sorry for Terra as he was being harshly scolded. It wasn’t like he was trying to use Darkness, at least not intentionally. She knew that it was only an accident but it wouldn’t help stop the shame he undoubtedly felt. He’ll probably curse himself for being too weak and letting Darkness in yet again once he thought no one was around, an occurrence she’s been privy to more than she had any right to be. She needed to talk with him once she had her wrist taken care of.

     With a hand on her back, Eraqus began leading her out of the great hall. She looked over her shoulder to catch one last glimpse of Terra before leaving. He hung his head in shame as he clenched his fists in what she believed to be anger. It was just as she expected. She turned her head back to face forward, hoping he wouldn’t blame himself more than he already was.

     They made their way over to the infirmary, where Eraqus gently took hold of her wrist to examine it. She could see now how bruised and swollen it was from the impact as she winced with every slight movement. He was able to determine she had a sprained wrist, which she regarded as a miracle. With the amount of force Terra had in his swing, she was thankful it didn’t result in a break. She was to keep it wrapped and iced for a couple days till it healed, something she had no problem with.

     After it was bandaged, she was told to take it easy until then. She asked Eraqus about Terra and he said he’d have a talk with him once enough time had passed for things to settle down. There was an undercurrent of regret in his voice, made even clearer by the expression on his face. Their master may be strict but he still cared for them, similar in the way a father would for his children. This gave her some hope in that he realized what happened was an accident and he’d forgive Terra. Time would only tell.

     She spent the rest of the day in the library. She figured she’d get some studying done if she couldn’t practice with her Keyblade for the next few days. Try as she might, though, she could barely focus on the words she was reading and that was if she didn’t reread the sentence to understand it. Her mind kept wandering to Terra, whether he was okay or not, and what he was doing right now. Worry gnawed at her heart until she couldn’t take it anymore. The sun was beginning to cast orange and violet hues across the sky when she decided and rushed out to find him.

     He wasn’t in the great hall or his room when she looked in. Searching all around the building yielded no results, either. She wondered where he could be, her anxiety growing as she saw night quickly approaching. He had to still be in the Land of Departure and the only place she hadn’t checked yet was the mountain. She ran out to the Forecourt and then beyond its boundary.

     Stars were twinkling into existence by the time she reached the winding path leading up to the mountain. If it weren’t for the lights set alongside the dirt road, she would’ve been stumbling about blindly in the dark. It was when she arrived at the overlook just before the summit she found him.

     His back faced her as she saw that he was sitting on the edge of the cliff. Taking a few steps closer revealed him to be looking down below the mountain with an indiscernible expression. It was troubling to see him like this. What happened earlier today had to be weighing heavily on his mind.

     Tentatively walking forward, she called out, “Terra?”

     He stiffened and quickly turned around to face her, asking a barrage of questions like, “Aqua, are you okay? How’s your wrist? Is it bad? It’s bad, isn’t it?”

     “No, no, it’s all right, see?” she replied, showing him her bandaged wrist. “Master said it was only a sprain and that it should be okay in a couple days as long as I took it easy.”

     He let out a sigh of relief, no doubt feeling some of the guilt be lifted off his shoulders. “That’s good. I don’t think I would’ve forgiven myself if I managed to break your wrist.”

     “Well, you didn’t, so don’t beat yourself up over it, okay?”

     Silence fell between them. She noticed him staring at her wrist with clouded eyes, despite her assurances of being fine. Before she could think of a way to broach the issue at hand, he spoke up.

     “Aqua, I’m…I’m sorry about what happened earlier. I swear, I didn’t mean to hurt you, it was an accident, and---”

    ��“I know, I know! You don’t need to apologize, I know you would never try and hurt me,” she interjected, trying to comfort him. “I’m more worried about you and how you’re doing after Master had those…words with you.”

     He averted his eyes from her. It wasn’t the first time she’d seen Eraqus scold Terra like he had before and those always left him feeling horrible with himself. She was used to being the one to get him back to normal but something told her this wouldn’t be as easy as previous times.

     Turning away from her, he said, “I deserved it. Master was right, I could’ve seriously hurt you.”

     “But you didn’t and that’s what matters,” she replied.

     “I was wielding Darkness, Aqua!” he exclaimed, taking her aback. He ran a hand through his hair before continuing on, “I thought it was gone. I thought I had it under control but I guess I don’t. Maybe it never left.”

     “Terra…” She walked up to him and placed a hand on his shoulder. “It’ll be okay. You’ve gotten rid of Darkness before, you can do it again. You just have to---”

     He brushed her off. “What if I don’t? What if I’ll always have Darkness inside me?”

     “What are you saying?”

     “Maybe I’m not meant to be a Keyblade Master. Maybe I’m just destined to fall into darkness. It’s my fate to lose my heart and become a Heartless.”

     “That won’t happen, Terra. You’re strong enough to resist it and---”

     “What if I’m not, Aqua? How else would you explain why I keep having Darkness come out of me? You can’t, can you?”

     To her horror, he was right. There was no way she could explain why Darkness lingered inside him, even with the numerous attempts to rid himself of it. It wasn’t because he had a weak heart, that much she was certain. So what was the connection between the two? Was Terra right in that he was destined to fall into darkness, either by losing his heart or some other means?

     The thought rocked her to the core. She didn’t want to believe his fate was to be lost in a hellish abyss until he was put out of his misery. He was her dear friend and he deserved so much more than being reduced to a lowly Heartless. She refused to accept it, which was why she decided to do something about it.

     “You won’t fall into darkness, Terra,” she affirmed, stepping around him to meet his gaze. “I know it.”

     “How? How can you be so sure?” he asked.

     “Because I won’t let you.” She took hold of his hand in a gentle yet firm grip. “I promise I won’t let you fall into darkness.”

     He seemed genuinely shocked by her words. She meant what she said and she planned on upholding her promise. It may be hard and it may even be treacherous at times but it’d all be worth it if he remained in the light.

     “And, if you do fall, I promise to always guide you back home,” she added, giving his hand a squeeze.

     “...You have that much faith in me, huh?” he asked, his voice barely above a whisper.

     “Why wouldn’t I?” She cupped his cheek. “You’re my friend, Terra, and I know you’re strong enough to resist its temptation. I’ll just be there to remind you every so often.”

     He said nothing, instead deciding to pull her into a hug. She was surprised by this, seeing as how he wasn’t a very affectionate person, at least in the physical aspect. She was about ready to question him on why he was doing this when she heard him whisper in her ear:

     “Thank you, Aqua, for believing in me.”

     Her heart fluttered in her chest from the sincerity in his voice. She could sometimes be slow on the uptake but this had to be a new record. It was only now she realized just how much her vow must’ve touched him and how badly he must’ve been feeling before she showed up. She was glad to have cheered him up some. Thus, she returned the hug and answered,

     “You’re welcome.”

     Terra wasn’t going to fall into darkness, not if she had anything to say about it. He won’t be led astray. She’d be his anchor to the realm of light. A promise is a promise, which she wholly planned to keep.

     Aqua breathed in deep and touched the tip of her paintbrush on the small piece of glass sitting in front of her. Drawing it upwards left the top half in a pretty shade of cyan blue. She continued to paint with delicate and meticulous strokes until she was satisfied with her work. The bottom half was then covered in a dark blue, which almost matched the ocean she imagined in her mind. Once the piece of glass was completely painted over, she gingerly picked it up and set it aside to dry. One down, four more to go before she moved on to the next phase.

     She was in the process of making her Wayfinder. She already crafted two others that happened to be sitting off to the side, one in amber and one in green. She hoped to give them to Terra and Ven soon once she was done creating hers. Seeing as how she and Terra were meant to have their Mark of Mastery exam in the near future, they were meant to be good luck charms and Ven was getting one simply because it’d be unfair if he was left out. They also had another purpose to them, something she thought was rather poignant and was the main reason she wanted them.

     Wayfinders were said to be designed after star-shaped fruit called Paopu, which were also said to tie friends together. If they carried these on them, nothing would drive them apart. They’d even help find one’s way back to them if they were ever lost. It may be silly of her to believe in this but it struck a chord within her when she first heard it and, in some ways, she wanted it to be true.

     The question of what would happen after she and Terra aced their exam had weighed heavily on her mind for some time. Eraqus had told them they could either travel beyond the Land of Departure and expand their horizons or succeed him and protect their world from Darkness. They hadn’t decided yet but she wondered what the aftermath of her choice would be. Would she choose to leave or stay? Whatever it may be, it meant Terra would have to contend with the other. Maybe the reason this was troubling her so much was because a part of her deep down was afraid of losing the two people she considered to be her best friends.

     She knew she had nothing to be scared of yet she worried all the same. It wasn’t like the bonds she shared with Ven and Terra were so weak, they’d break upon setting foot outside their home. Their strength would remain steadfast, even if the three of them were far apart from each other. She just needed to remind herself of that whenever she was lost in her thoughts.

     The last glass piece was painted and she put it beside the others to dry. With that out of the way, the next thing to do would be setting the five glass pieces into place and soldering them to the frame so they wouldn’t fall out when she held the Wayfinder facing up. It was too late to do it tonight but she would get straight to it after her training tomorrow.

     She glanced over to where the other two Wayfinders were sitting. She stood up from her desk, reached her hand out to grab them, and sat back down. They shone brilliantly under the golden light pouring in from her window. A lot’s happened over the last few years.

     She never thought Eraqus would take in another apprentice but it was at the behest of an old friend so that’s how Ventus came into the picture. Fragile was the best word to describe him when they first met, like he could collapse at any moment. It fit him even more when he actually did from Terra’s bombardment of questions, falling into an almost come-like state for several days. Her skepticism as to whether he was capable of becoming a Keyblade Master only grew when Eraqus said he was amnesiac and that was why he fainted. How could someone like him become Master when he was so weak, for lack of a better term?

     Yet he managed to prove her wrong. The more time he spent with the two of them, the stronger he got, to the point he was able to keep up with them in battle. He wasn’t as powerful as Terra or as magically gifted as her but he made up for it with swiftness and sheer tenacity. The only reason he wasn’t taking the Mark of Mastery exam along with them was because of his age, though she believed it was also due to him needing to outgrow some things, like his rebellious streak for example. He’d be a great Keyblade Master one day, she was sure of it.

     Terra’s changed so much over the years. He was no longer a child struggling to keep his head above water as he flailed his Keyblade about. He’s grown into a strong and capable man she was proud to call her friend and rival. He’d be her fellow Master in due time as well and then they’d stand together to protect both theirs and many other worlds from Heartless someday. At least, that’s what she envisioned before things somehow became different between them.

     She couldn’t quite explain what changed between her and Terra. It wasn’t like the way they interacted with each other was different from normal. They still met up every day to talk and train so that couldn’t be it. The only thing she noticed was…well, things she had never really noticed from him before. Not that they were never there but they were only starting to make themselves known to her.

     Before Ven, she’d only seen three sides to Terra. The dutiful pupil to their master, the reliable confidant to her, and the introspective self-doubter when he thought he was alone. It was only after Ven entered their circle she saw the kind and protective side of him, almost like he was an older brother to him. She always knew those qualities existed within him but it was different seeing them in action to someone other than her. It’s only now she’s really acknowledged them.

     He was still her friend but there was a deeper meaning now. Her feelings towards him were different than her feelings towards Ven and maybe that was because she’s known him practically all her life as opposed to the four years for Ven. Maybe all this was was her growing up and becoming an adult, which meant changing feelings and realizing that things were going to be different for her now, whether she liked it or not. Throw in the anxiety of potentially drifting away from him and she was left with a jumbled up mess of complications she struggled to put a label on.

     All this was doing was giving her a headache. She should be focusing on the road ahead instead of thinking herself into a corner and letting her mind run wild. She’s so close to accomplishing her dream and she couldn’t risk anything jeopardizing it. Whatever answers she wanted, she’d find them after becoming Master.

     She looked down at the Wayfinders still held in her hands and pressed them close to her chest. She let out a heavy sigh as she tried to calm herself. Different was new but it didn’t have to be bad. Change was a part of everyone’s lives and she and Terra were no exceptions.

     Things may be different between them but it didn’t mean they were bad. It could mean they were good and she just couldn’t see how yet. As long as they were together, nothing truly bad would happen. That’s what she hoped.

     Aqua sat at the end of the dock, watching the sun set over the horizon. A warm, pleasant breeze was blowing through, carrying with it the strong scent of salt. She could hear the ocean’s waves rolling along the sandy shore and leaves from the trees behind her rustling. This was everything she imagined a beach to be like. The only things missing from it were Terra and Ven.

     The Destiny Islands was what this world was called. She only stopped by with the intention of taking a short rest but it was after reality began to sink in she had to give herself something more than that. She needed a moment where she could think clearly, decompress, and just breathe. She needed this before going back out there and starting the whole process over again. That’s where she was now.

     Where did it all go wrong? She finally managed to achieve her dream of becoming a Keyblade Master but it felt like a hollow victory when it turned out Terra failed the exam on account of his Darkness flaring up again. Then she was asked by their master to keep an eye on him in case he strayed too close to darkness, which she didn’t agree with but knew it was out of concern for him so she followed. It was through that she learned of the questionable acts seemingly committed by Terra and it caused her to doubt him and his resolve. When she met up with him and Ven at Radiant Garden and she revealed the truth of her being there, their trust in her was shattered.

     Then she found out Ven was being hunted down by a masked boy, who had ties to Master Xehanort. He’d been pulling strings behind the scenes and he was dragging Terra along for the ride. An encounter with the masked boy in Neverland left her exhausted yet she still trudged on before arriving here. All she was trying to do was make things right so why did it turn out like this?

     Maybe she wasn’t cut out to be a Master. They were supposed to keep the balance between light and dark, protect the worlds from malevolent forces. If she couldn’t even protect her best friends, the two people she treasured above all else, then what good was she? Eraqus was wrong in making her a Master, much less his successor. She never should have become one.

     She took out her Wayfinder and just held it. The orange hue of the sunset washed away the once vibrant blue into something dull and dark. Her heart grew heavier the longer she looked at it, running her thumb over the token in the center. Nothing would drive them apart, huh?

     It was never that she thought of Ven as weak or doubted his capabilities. It was never, ever that. She just wanted him to be safe, to be unharmed because she knew she couldn’t always be there to save him. There was a part of her that still viewed him as the fragile boy she first met who fell comatose from one too many questions. Sure, he’s grown much stronger since then, but she felt the need to protect him regardless. He was her dear friend and she wouldn’t know how to live with herself if he got hurt and she wasn’t there to help him. She’d rather have him hate her for being overbearing than risk losing him because she wasn’t cautious.

     She wished she could express how sorry she was to Terra. She vouched for him to Eraqus, swearing he was strong enough to resist the dark temptations, yet hearsay was all it took for her to lose faith in him. Xehanort’s machinations framed him as someone he wasn’t and she fell for it so easily. It honestly pissed her off that he was manipulating and taking advantage of Terra and his trusting nature. While he wasn’t exactly innocent in this, it was clear as to who the real mastermind was. She wanted so badly to apologize to him, to tell him she should never have doubted him.

     Her grip on the Wayfinder tightened as she felt her eyes beginning to burn. Did they have theirs still, she wondered. She wanted to believe they did but was it childishly naive of her to cling to that narrow hope?

     She was a horrible friend to them. She caused one to lose faith in her and she may as well have betrayed the other. She may have pushed Ven too far away for him to come back and drove Terra further into the darkness. She wouldn’t fault them for wanting nothing to do with her anymore. She wouldn’t, either, if the roles were reversed. Were their bonds now severed?

     No, they couldn’t be. The magic she placed on each of their Wayfinders was still active and she could still feel Terra and Ven’s hearts through hers. That had to be her silver lining in this. Even if the cord connecting the three of them together frayed till it was only a thread, that thread was unbreakable.

     She needed to protect them. She couldn’t let Xehanort and that masked boy do whatever they wanted with them. They wouldn’t hesitate to save her if she were in the same position so she shouldn’t, either. They were precious to her, she’d do anything, even give her life, if it meant they’d be safe.

     She stood up from the dock, Wayfinder still in her hand, and looked up at the now starry sky. She didn’t know where they were but she didn’t need to. Her heart was going to be her guiding key.

     They needn’t worry much longer. She was going to find them and the three of them were going to stop whatever Xehanort had planned. Then they would share one more night under the stars, like they had all that time ago.

     May they find a way to each other once more.

     Aqua watched on in horror as the man in front of her stabbed his Keyblade into his chest. She wanted to cry out his name but she couldn’t find the strength within her to do so, having thoroughly exhausted herself from their fight earlier. His body went slack, his Keyblade vanishing into thin air, as a portal of swirling darkness opened beneath him. He fell back and, quickly realizing where it led to, she dove in after him.

     She had to save him. It may not have been Terra, not completely, but his heart was still in his body, she just knew it. Why else would he have let her go when he was so close to finishing her off? She couldn’t leave him to wander in the Realm of Darkness for all eternity. Even if it meant bringing Xehanort back, she’d never forgive herself for doing that to him if he was still in there. She made him a promise and she was damn well going to keep it.

     The first thing she noticed was how cold it was. It wasn’t freezing but it was still too chilly for her liking, evident from her shivering. She felt like she was stuck in an empty black void as she searched around for any sign of Terra. She was eventually able to find a dim light just a few meters below her, a light she recognized as his. Summoning her Keyblade, she changed its form to that of her Glider and raced towards the light, not once taking her eyes off it.

     It didn’t take long to reach him. The light grew dimmer and dimmer the closer she got before dimming completely upon seeing him. He looked to be just sleeping, even when he was plummeting straight down to what she considered to be hell. She grabbed onto his arm and struggled to lift him onto her Glider, only managing to accomplish that feat by sheer force of will. Giving him a quick once-over revealed no visible wounds and he seemed to be breathing normally. Relieved that he was physically all right, she turned the Glider around and began heading back up.

     She had him and he was going to be okay. They would be back in Radiant Garden soon and she was going to fix him. She and whoever else could help her were going to find a way to get Xehanort’s heart out of him. Then she and him would go home and wake Ven up, like she said they would. They’d be together again. Their master may be gone now but they’d have each other to lean on and support. The hope of them being reunited again was the only thing keeping her going at this point. After everything that’s happened, she needed this to come true. She almost wanted to pray to whatever power there be to grant her wish, to give her this.

     Well, a deity or some other higher being there was heard her and sneered. Her heart dropped once she saw the portal they came in from starting to close. They were still so far away and it was shrinking with each passing second. It would be gone by the time they reached it, leaving them stuck in the Realm of Darkness with no way out. She looked over at Terra’s unconscious form and, knowing what had to be done, made her choice without any hesitation.

     That was when it hit her. She finally found her answer and she wanted to scold herself for taking so long to realize it. She finally knew what Terra was to her and it was so easy, so simple to understand that there was really no excuse. He wasn’t just a friend to her, he was more than that, he deepened beyond that. It was only natural, in some ways, for her to have fallen for him.

     She loved him. She loved everything about him, from his ability to want to see the good in people to his devotion to her and Ven. She can scarcely remember a life where he wasn’t a part of it nor did she want such a life. He was irreplaceable, someone she confided in, a man she could talk to about anything without fear of judgment. He was her rock, her dearly beloved. She loved him, which was why she was able to decide on her fate with little regret.

     She was going to take his place. Her promise came out of a love different from what it was now but she planned to uphold it all the same. Her love for Terra was stronger than her hatred of the man possessing him and she couldn’t bear to leave him behind to die in a hellish wasteland. It only hurt to know she wouldn’t be there to help guide him back home, to her and Ven.

     She disembarked from her Glider and went around to the side. Terra appeared to be holding onto the handles somewhat, which seemed to be the only reason he was staying on it instead of falling. She brushed the back of her hand against his cheek before resting it on his, giving it a gentle squeeze. She was going to miss him when she was gone but this was for the best.

     “We’ll meet again someday.” She squeezed his hand again. “Even if so much time has passed, we’ll meet again.” She was giving both him and herself false hope. “I’ll always be with you, okay?” She didn’t believe she would find a way out. “Goodbye, Terra.”

     Then she let go and began falling. She didn’t take her eyes off him once as she fell, even when it became too dark for her to see him clearly. She wanted him to be the last thing she saw if she were to possibly die in the next few moments. She only wished she could’ve amended things between her, Terra, and Ven before their grand battle in the Keyblade Graveyard but she was resigned to contend with this. She’d be okay with taking that regret to her grave.

     Tears rolled down her cheeks but she smiled through them. She saved him from a fate of wandering the dark realm alone. She hoped Terra would win out in his fight against Xehanort and reclaim his body as the image of him finally disappeared from her sight. Maybe, just maybe, they’d meet again in the next life.

     She closed her eyes as she let the darkness overtake her. It was then she heard herself say those three little words that carried with them so much meaning. Whether she said them aloud or she only imagined she did, it didn’t matter. All she wanted was for those words to reach Terra’s heart, to let him know why she did what she did. That was her last thought before succumbing to the cold.

     “I love you.”

#airi's writing #terraqua #aqua #terra #ventus #eraqus #fanfiction #kingdom hearts #canon divergence

[im-bakugous-bitch]

Shoto Todoroki - Heartbreak

**A/N Hey guys!  I know it’s been a long time since I wrote anything, and I wanted to post something since I haven’t in a while.  I have finals this week, and then I’ll be free for the summer and be back to writing for you guys!  In the meantime, I originally wrote this as a TodoDeku piece, but changed it to x reader so I could post it here.  I hope you guys enjoy!

Shoto had been distant lately.

It was all you could think about.  For some reason it felt like Shoto had given up, but he couldn’t have.  You still walked that path that brought you close to both your houses and kissed when you parted ways.  He was still saying “I love you”.  Just because he was distant and busy didn’t mean it was over.

That’s what you told yourself, at least.  Deep down, you knew it was all lies.  You just preferred to live in ignorance, even only so you could call him yours.  You were unhappy with how Shoto brushed you off on a daily basis, but you were willing to put up with it.  You loved Shoto, you’d seen the good times and believed you could get back there if Shoto would just put in some effort.  He didn’t even have to do much, just show up.  You loved enough for the both of you.

When Shoto announced that he was going on a trip for recommendation students, your heart broke. Shoto would be out of the country for nearly three weeks.  But the more you thought about it, the better you felt.

Maybe time apart was what you needed.  Maybe Shoto just needed some time to himself in order to see just how important you were to him.  Then he’d come back and things would be good again, right?

You couldn’t have been more wrong.

Shoto had been gone seven days, and you were feeling good.  Shoto was having an awesome time on his trip, which made you happy.  One day you had sent Shoto a photo that made you laugh, to which Shoto responded with many funny photos of his own.

That small action alone reassured you more than words ever could.  Just like it used to be.  Everything was going to be okay.

Turns out, you could have been more wrong.

You were talking with Ochako when it happened.  “I think it’ll be okay,” you said.  “I think when he comes back, we’ll go out to dinner somewhere, then cuddle on the couch and watch a movie.  Just like we used to.”  As you finished your sentence, your phone chimed.  You checked who was messaging you and smiled when you saw Shoto’s contact photo. “It’s from Shoto!”

Look, I’ve been feeling this way for a few weeks and I really just need to do this now. I’m breaking up with you and I’m sorry I’m doing this over text, I feel like an asshole.  I just wanted to do this sooner or later because I didn’t wanna give you false hope.  I just haven’t been feeling the spark between us from when we first started going out. I’m really sorry, I hope we can still be friends and things can stay mutual between us.

You screamed.  You didn’t know what else to do, so you just let out a loud wail.  Your stomach dropped as your eyes immediately began to water.  

What had happened? Things were going to be okay!  It was all going to be okay!  Why did he have to quit?  You threw your phone down as Ochako moved to sit beside you.  

“Shh,” she said in an attempt to soothe you.  She rubbed your back gently, watching you scream and shout for the next minute as you came to terms with what was happening.  She didn’t even need to read the text to know that you had just been dumped.

After your moment, you wiped your eyes and looked down at your phone.  You reread the message again and again, just to make sure you were seeing it clearly.  Maybe you were imagining it.  Or better yet – maybe this was all some horrible nightmare.  You weren’t sure what you’d do if it was real.

You wanted to yell at Shoto.  You wanted to scream and cry and hold him close and beg him to stay.  Why had he done this?  Why were you only worth a text?  After nearly nine months together, you had given him your all and Shoto had given nothing.  You’d done so much for Shoto to make him happy.  Why didn’t you even get a face-to-face breakup?

You’d known it was coming.  You said it was going to be okay and tried to trick yourself into really believing it, but deep down you knew the truth.  

Shoto had fallen out of love with you.

Not tying and sending the million pleading things you wanted to say was one of the hardest things you ever had to do.  You sat there, phone in hand, trying to come up with something to say.  You couldn’t just leave that on open.  But what does one say to something like that?

It’s okay, I understand.  Don’t ever hesitate if you change your mind.

You regretted the message as soon as you hit send.  You shouldn’t have said it was okay, because it sure as hell was not. Shoto had become this central figure in your life, the only person you could be around without ever getting tired. He’d become your everything and he just left.  He just gave up.  He didn’t even try.

Actually, it isn’t okay.  I wasn’t expecting this.  I’ll be honest, I knew you were going to leave me, but I thought I meant enough to you to at least be worth a face to face – or phone call at least!  Video chat!  Anything besides a TEXT MESSAGE!  Guess I overestimated my importance to you.  

You stared at the typed-out message on your phone for three whole minutes.  Your finger remained close to the send button, but never came close enough to send it.  Eventually, you backed down and erased the message.  You were hoping maybe in a day or two, Shoto would change his mind. Maybe he’d realize what an awful mistake he’d made.  If you sent that message, you knew there’d be no going back.

You stood up, causing Ochako’s hand to fall off your back.  “I’m going for a walk,” you said plainly.  You walked away without waiting for a response.  It was cold out, but you didn’t bother to grab a jacket.  It was getting dark, but you didn’t bother to grab a flashlight.

You walked around the UA campus for what felt like hours.  Every passing second felt like its own forever.  You’d started crying again at one point, but you weren’t sure exactly when that was.  It wasn’t until you heard a voice call out to you that you wiped away your tears.

“Young l/n?”  You’d recognize that voice anywhere.  All Might, your favorite person in the world. Well, second favorite to Shoto. “What are you doing out here?”

For once, you didn’t want to talk to All Might.  You just wanted to be alone.  You pushed past your hero’s fragile figure, not giving an answer as you ran off.  You could apologize later.

All Might chased after you, grabbing onto your shoulder.  “What’s wrong?”

You felt weak.  You were supposed to be training to be a Hero, and instead you were acting like some heartbroken teenager.  Even though you were a heartbroken teenager, you shouldn’t have been acting that way.  But you couldn’t help it.  It was all you could think about.  You wiped your eyes and sniffled as you looked up into All Might’s blazing blue eyes. “Sh-Sh-Shoto d-d-d-dumped m-me…”

All Might’s gaze softened as he let out a sigh.  “I’m sorry, Young l/n.”  He put a hand on your shoulder, but to his surprise it was just brushed off.

You didn’t want to see anyone.  You just wanted to be alone so you could cry.  For the last couple of weeks, people had been telling you the relationship was coming to an end.  Whenever you’d confide in your friends about your relationship problems, you’d always hear the same thing: “It’s only a matter of time, y/n.”

All Might gently reached out to you again, pulling you close into an embrace.  All Might was the closest figure you had ever had to a father, and you was basically All Might’s child.  It killed him to see you in pain.

Once pulled into the hug, you lost control.  You gripped onto All Might’s white t-shirt tightly as tears streamed down your cheeks and incoherent sobs left your lips.

The rest of the night after that was just a blur.

Next thing you knew, you were waking up in your bed.  Not your dorm bed – your home bed.  You’d forgotten UA was getting a week-long break and you were going home for the week.  Your head was pounding, you could hardly recall the previous day’s events.  You opened your phone and typed in your passcode, 74686, spelling out Shoto.  When it didn’t work, everything came flooding back.  You’d changed your password.  You’d changed your lock screen.

With a simple text, Shoto had changed your life.

Fresh tears welled in your eyes, and you buried your face in your pillow.  You were determined not to let them fall this time.  You had to be strong.

After only a few minutes, your mother knocked on your door.  “y/n?” she asked as she turned the doorknob and pushed the door open.  When she saw you sitting up in your bed, hugging a tear-stained pillow, her eyes filled with sorrow as she rushed to you. “I’m so sorry, honey,” she said gently as she held you close, and you cried into her shoulder.

The week carried on just like that.  Late Sunday night, you returned to UA.  You immediately ran into your dorm and laid face-down on your pillow until you fell asleep.

The following morning was the hardest yet.

You were waking up early to meet Shoto before class.  You’d sent Shoto a message; you had some things you wanted back, plus you wanted answers.  You planned to ask why he’d done it.  Why you hadn’t been good enough.  Why you didn’t get a face-to-face conversation.  You had a million questions flooding through your mind, and you planned to ask all of them.

But when you saw Shoto approaching, they all disappeared.

You stood up from the bench you were sitting on with Ochako and Tsuyu.  You followed as Shoto led you around a corner before leaning against a wall.  In his one outstretched hand he held your requested belongings, and once they were taken he crossed his arms over his chest.

You studied him. He looked fine.  No bloodshot or swollen eyes, no tear-stains, nothing.  He looked totally unaffected by the whole thing, and that hurt more than the initial break-up.  Not only did Shoto not care enough to break up with you in person, he didn’t care at all.  He looked like he was already over it.  Just a week shy of nine months together, and Shoto felt nothing.

Shoto raised his eyebrows expectantly at you, as you were just standing there and staring at him. You had your million questions you wanted to ask, dozens of ways to ask them, but you could only get one word out:

“Why?”

Shoto shrugged his shoulders so nonchalantly that you wanted to punch him.  “I just…didn’t feel it anymore.”

The billions of pieces your heart had shattered into even more.  Your heart was beating so fast, your eyes were already beginning to water.  You couldn’t cry in front of Shoto, but you couldn’t think of any of your other questions. You opened your mouth to speak, but no words came out.  What could you even say to that?

Shoto pursed his lips as he looked you up and down.  “I’ll see you around.”  With that he walked away, leaving you shattered and broken, standing there with your retrieved objects fallen to the ground and forgotten, as tears raced down your cheeks.

#shoto #shoto x reader #todoroki #todoroki x reader #shoto todoroki #shoto todoroki x reader #todoroki shoto #todoroki shoto x reader #my hero academia #my hero academia x reader #mha #mha x reader #boku no hero academia #boku no hero academia x reader #bnha #bnha x reader #my hero academia shoto #my hero academia shoto x reader #mha shoto #mha shoto x reader #boku no hero academia shoto #boku no hero academia shoto x reader #bnha shoto #bnha shoto x reader #my hero academia x reader shoto #mha x reader shoto #boku no hero academia x reader shoto #bnha x reader shoto #my hero academia todoroki #my hero academia todoroki x reader

[iknowyouthinkimbulletproof]

If this is the last time- Calum Hood

A/N: first 5sos fic! Calum hood x y/n. Y/n’s gender is female for this fic, it just made it easier to write, my apologies to anyone it might upset, but you can always request. based off of If This Is The Last Time by LANY. Feel free to correct any mistakes! i don’t know if anyone will like this, but i do soooo.

https://open.spotify.com/track/3bsRMvQja4huvPWo1S5ONc  

NOT MY GIF

plot: Entries for y/n’s last diary/book.

2077 words. * marks song lyrics 

-

y/n’s diary:

(June 8th 2081) There's nothing better than the support of your family, so imagine having been admitted to the hospital and having every person you’ve grown to know as family waiting for you to leave the hospital. We knew it was coming, that one of us would have to go, but we didn’t know who and when. It’s me and soon. I’m not afraid though. My family’s strong, I know they are. Today he told me I looked beautiful, like he has every day of our life together, but it felt different. It was like a reassurance that no matter what, he meant his vows. Everything felt different today, even the simple touch of his hands while he drove me to the hospital.  Especially the way our children said they loved me this morning. I’m ready. There's no point in fighting the cancer, it’s too far along and I'm far too old.

*I know we're gettin' old*

(January 15th 2082) It had begun after the boys last tour, the realization that we were no longer as young as we used to be. Our children started high school and y/s/n starting his own band, following in his father’s footsteps. y/d/n was too, but she had taken the football/soccer approach. They were good at it too. y/s/n having the same beautiful voice as Calum, but preferred the drums. He learned from a young age, he never really stopped admiring his uncle Ash. Which was really Ashton’s fault, almost spoiled him as much as Luke did y/d/n. Luke never got the girl he wanted, so he treated her as if he was one of his own. All the boys did, but Luke was like a second father to her. Which didn’t help with the Cake rumors during touring.

*the lines on our hands have changed, But you still look at me the same*

(September 29th 2082)  My life has been amazing, maybe not from the start, but from the moment I laid my eyes on Calum Hood, the past didn’t matter. Nothing matters, nothing but him. Well until my  children of course...and then my grandchildren. He stood by me for all of it and I love him for it. He promised forever and that's what we got. There's nothing I could ever do to repay him, or at least in my eyes. 

*Hey, mom, guess what? You're really tough.*

(November 15th 2082) This is for my children, I hope you’re reading. I love you, I'll always love you because there’s no way not to. From the moment you were both born to the moment your children were born, I was amazed by the amount of growth possible. I hope one day you’ll have the same joy I did watching your grandchildren being raised by the amazing creatures you created. I hope that one day when you pass, it’ll be surrounded by the ones you love.  Thank you for giving me the opportunity to love you, I don't know what I did to deserve you, but I'm very grateful. 

*And I know you did all you could. Just to make sure my life was good*

(December 25th 2082) It was worth it, all of it. The pain, the tears, the blood. My life is complete.

*Sorry for the fights and the tone of my voice, Sorry for the nights when I made the wrong choice*

(January 1st 2083) Not a lot of people know, but Calum and i’s relationship was almost torn apart when our children were in high school. It had nothing to do with them of course, but life for Cal had been stressful. He had confessed he felt like he had no purpose now that he thought his career was over. Of course it wasn’t true, but he was like a bull in a china shop. After many nights of hushed fighting, y/s/n had gotten into it. He had convinced his father to start therapy and got him into football/soccer again. From then on, y/d/n got him to become her team's coach and he stayed there until retirement, he said he felt complete after retirement. 

*Life is flyin' by and it's hittin' me now. I hope it's not, but*

(January 5th 2083) Sitting here rereading all of my old diaries, has me regretting not taking the course of treatment. I'm gonna miss everyone. That might be hard to believe considering I will no longer be roaming the planet, but everyone means so much to me.

*If this is the last time, please come close*

(January 12th 2083) It's too soon.

*I love you with all my heart, you know. I don't wanna cry, I'm bad at goodbye*

(January 13th 2083) This is my written goodbye for those who I love. 

Michael you’ve always been my best friend. I appreciate you taking me in like you knew me forever, like I was there with you and Calum throughout school. I'm sorry I didn't give you another niece to spoil, I know you wanted one you didn’t have to say it. With everything in me, I hope you're the last one of us here, I trust you the most other than Calum to take care of our families. If you are, I hope I don't tear you apart, we’ll all be up here waiting for you.

Luke, where do i start, i owe you 30 bucks. You always said that I would go before Cal, you were right. Don't worry, no hard feelings, none of us actually expected it so soon. But you better be there when my first great-grandchild is born. Make y/d/n name them after me. I'm just kidding, although…… 

 Ashton, thank you for being the big brother I didn't know I needed. Thank you for loving my family like your own and for taking care of Cal when I couldn't. I’m coming to join you right now, see you soon brother.

Kristal, Sierra, and kay-kay…...Bye my bitches, see you soon. I'm just messing with you, you better keep your stubborn asses on this planet a while more. I'll be taking care of ashton for you kay.

For the fans, who have loved my not so small family, there will be a 5sos reunion waiting for you when you pass, but not too soon.

y/d/n and y/s/n stick together or you grounded. I love you, I already said everything I needed to say to you, take care of my grandchildren.

Now Calum, i don’t think i need to write anything for you, we’ve always been honest with each other. Don’t come see me until you’ve met our great-grandchild, stay there for a while until you have enough memories to share with me. Hold our children tight, i know i won’t get to anymore. Just because I'm leaving doesn’t mean you don’t get to spend more time with me, I'll be watching you. When you join me, we’ll get to spend more decades together, and just like the first time you met me, you won’t be able to get away

*If this is the last time,Then let's do the things we always do,Like go to the mall and buy some shoes*

(January 16th 2083) My last day before I'm on bed rest, for the rest of my life in fact. y/d/n was determined to take everyone in the family to the mall. I didn’t get anything of course, but I did suggest a couple of clothing items for my funeral. My funeral, that’s weird to think about. I did get Calum a pair of shoes though. His feet will not walk in with the raggedy old shoes he loves so much.

*I don't wanna cry, I'm bad at goodbye. If this is the last time*

(January 21st 2083) Here I am, on my deathbed, writing what will probably be my last entry. Calum on the other bed in the room, of course he had it pushed next to mine. “We haven’t slept apart in decades, why start now.” I hope he doesn’t take it hard, but I can feel it coming. I can feel the pull. Watching the monitors and seeing the numbers change drastically. We've been saying goodbyes for a while now. As much as it pains me to say this is my final goodbye. Goodbye.

*Hey, dad, what's up? Miss you so much

Yeah, the shade of your hair has changed

But I look up to you the same*

(March 20th 2085) y/n asked us to turn her diary’s into a book series, we had, this is my continuation of the last one. y/s/n has promised to keep publishing them after i’m gone. He said he knew how much it would mean to his mother. Unfortunately this is my last entry as well. I will be joining y/n soon, i knew i wouldn’t make it long without her, i was right. They say i’ll probably die in my sleep sometime this week. I have our children staying with me, waiting till I go. I already said my goodbyes to our grandchildren and my brothers. My mother has been gone for a while, I can't wait to see her again. Mali wished me luck and said she would see us again. I hope it’s not too soon, I want her to be there while y/s/n and y/d/n grieve a second death. y/n said she wasn’t afraid, i understand now. Anyways, I guess this is goodbye. 

*Taught me how to fish, taught me how to ride a bike*

(July 25th 2086) Hey guys, it’s y/s/n and y/d/n this time. I hope you enjoyed reading mom, and some of dad's writings. I'm not quite passing yet, but my sister and I thought this last book is not quite done yet. We wanted to add our goodbyes to mom and dad as well. Maybe we shouldn’t write it here, but it feels right. We wanted to say thank you to all the fans who have supported our parents for decades, or even the newer ones. So thank you, you made our parents who they were and in return, made us and our families who they are. We love it thank you. So, goodbye dad. It might be a few decades till we see each other, but we are currently teaching my son how to ride his bike, just like you did me all those years ago, thank you for that. y/d/n is teaching hers to fish, we know it wasn’t mom's idea of fun, but she always did it with us, so now we are doing it with our families.

*Taught me how to love, how to treat a woman right. Life is flyin' by and it's hittin' me now*

(September 6th 2086)  y/g/d/n here, i asked mom if i could write something as well, just wanted to thank my grandparents for everything! That's a lot to thank for, I know, but I forgot before they passed. I also wanted to inform them that I finally started college, makes me think of what they would have done if they were here.

*If this is the last time, please come close

I love you with all my heart, you know

I don't wanna cry, I'm bad at goodbye

If this is the last time

Then let's do the things we always do

Like go for a drive or watch the news

I don't wanna cry, I'm bad at goodbye

If this is the last time*

(May 7th 2090) The last entry of the last book of my grandmother’s series. It’s y/g/s/n for your information. The last written update, it’s been years since grandma wrote in this book, but she got what she wanted, uncle Michael truly was the last of the bunch. He’s here waiting for his turn, but he did what was asked of him….and Luke. My first child wasn’t named after grandma, but when we were having our second Michael jumped at the opportunity, he’s holding y/n right now. He said she looks like a young grandma, so i guess it’s fitting. He’s on his way to join our family right now, I'm the last to say goodbye. I know you probably heard it a lot in this book, but thank you guys for everything, we love you.

#calum hood x y/n #calum x reader #calum hood #5sos imagine #sad imagines #fluffy angst? #fic #imagines #sorry not sorry #Lots of Love #-Lizza

[booksandwords]

Invision by Sherrilyn McQueen

Series: Chronicles of Nick, #7 Read time: 1 Day Rating: 5/5

The quote: “Well, aren’t you a cheeky one?” “So says my father. It’s ever a fault of mine that I don’t know my place. But who better to know my place than I, says I? And who so better to determine it? For I will not be hemmed in by anyone else’s expectations. This is my life, such as it is. And it will be lived under my rules so long as I have it.” — Caleb Malphas & Lilliana

I am not tagging this with a spoiler warning but read on at your own risk. Invision (and this review) contain spoilers for the wider Dark-Hunter verse.

Let's start with something important to those reading Chronicles of Nick and The Dark Hunter Universe. I'm not sure where Sherri is up to in her story of Jaden in the DH books (I'm picking and choosing my way through them), but I know Jaden is an upcoming book that should lay his story bare. Invision may contain massive spoilers for Jaden's book. That reason only Jared knows? Yeah, that is in here and that piece of lore is unlikely to change between the two. Most of the spoilers I tag in this review are relevant to not just Invision but Jaden. If you want to go into Jaden's story without prior knowledge do not read Invision. And I apologise in advance this review gets quite long.

This is another book with a whole lot of story to tell. And it leads well into Intensity, the last book of the series. Well may not be the right word it ends on a cliffhanger. There is a lot of lore added, we finally get an explanation of pith points in a way that makes sense. We meet some new characters and learn a lot pf backstory on some of the characters that we already knew. But there is a lot of time spent on family and found family as is normal. It turns out that even less of the characters than we thought are strictly human. I enjoyed this a lot it helps me understand a lot more and I live for Sherri's lore.

My queen is back. Hello, my beloved Lilliana. Never has a character so long dead had such a lasting and irrefutable impact on a series while barely appearing. Xevikan's Myone is also a powerful woman. We finally find out how Caleb met Lilliana met. Including the wonderful exchange "Are all demons as gigantic as you?" "Depends on the species." "Are all women as brave as you?" "Depends on the species." (Lilliana & Caleb Malphas, p62). She chose his name because of its meaning "the faithful, fearless warrior who defends what he believes with everything he has" (Lilliana, p66), which isn't far off the Hebrew meaning. Myone was Xev's anchor his reason for existence the reason he was willing to do so much. His story isn't this dissimilar to Braiths in a way. Blessedly the brothers are back on speaking terms.

Book random dump

Reading Cay openly admit brotherhood with Xev is something I needed to see and made me smile.

"I think I know now why the gods made the two of you so incredibly hot. You'd be insufferable otherwise"  Kody (p.85) about Caleb and Nick. I mean I can totally see why people tell Kody to ask her other boyfriend. She stopped pretending a while back.

I like the choice to interchange Kody and Nyira now. But what is Nyira? It doesn't appear to be a name.

This is the first time I've seen any indication that Simi will get her own story.  Kody knows who her husband will be. There were only three options in the room at that point. Jaden, Xev or Caleb. All will exist is the DH universe. Jaden needs good in his life. I'll take that and run.

Cadegan is more complicated than I thought. In his bio he calls Thorn his lost brother, Noir gives aways his parentage Thorn is his father. Well, Son of No One just got bumped up my tbr.

Is this the first time we've heard Caleb's full designation? Esme Daeve. Like Nick thrives on fights, rage.

Bout time we got a demon hunter. Didn't expect that character though.

“He was a chaos god, Nick. The god of blood disease, fire, plagues, famine, violent death, fear, and destruction.” (Caleb p.175) Good lord Xev. You really did get all the fun stuff, and he's the Malachai's blood slave.

As a side point, I'm adding a could of pieces of general tidbits because I keep forgetting them.

The six generals of the ušumgallu. Grim, Bane and Laguerre who live permanently earthside. The others who had to be called, Xevikan, Livia and Yrre.

Nick's six generals (chosen at the end of Instinct). "Nashira. Xev. Dagon. Aeron. Kody. Caleb." Narshira is the yōkai formerly trapped in Nick's Grimoire. Aeron the forgotten son of the Morrígan. Dagon, son of Noir and Hekate, aided Lycaon to create the Were-hunters.

The six primal gods. Those of the light; Razer, Cam and Verlyn (aka Jaden). Those of the dark; Noir, Azure and Braith. Braith is complicated, while she aligns to the dark she is more grey. Two of the primary gods are missing; Razer and Braith. Verlyn was captured. Making me wonder... is Razer in play already and just not revealing his identity. Cam is Menyara, Verlyn is Jaden both are known in DH but their identities aren't known.

So... Parentage. Who is related to who is a big deal in the CoN series. But relatives are power and mostly seem to be an indicator of where your allegiance should lie. There is a theme that appears of the abandoned half children acting out of spite for one parent at least until they find themselves. As Xev puts it “Born of both sides. Forever lured between them. Never trusted by either, and cursed by both.” (p.287).  Nick's line is particularly important. Did anyone else not realise that Xev was Nick's Grandfather during that wonderful bomb drop during Chapter 8 of Instinct? I reread it knowing the truth and yeah the indication is there. Mostly in the way he looks at Cherise, maybe she favours Myone more than we know and in the way he speaks. But it isn't said. And I really think it needed to be. In light of this and other revelations halfway through Invision, I decided I needed to make a small family tree because good lord this should not be that complicated but it feels like it is. I think there are minor allusions to Nick's tree somehow being connected to Kody's (through the primordials) but I can't figure it out. I'm writing this after I binge-read Intensity which adds a whole lot more so I'm adding it to that review instead. Beware spoilers if you go there.

One last thing from Dream Warrior... “I’m helping to train the new Malachai and I just wanted to know something.” “That is?” “Does anyone else know you’re related to him?” (Jared and M'Adoc, p.314). By Dream Warrior Nick is in his mid-twenties and everyone knows he's the Malachai. My question which is not answered there. Does Jared know? He's powerful and Nick is his blood he should be able to pick it. I've always thought Dark Hunter was the Ambrose timeline but I don't think it is. Theoretically, M'Adoc doesn't exist in that timeline.

God this review is long. I knew that anyway. My Goodreads review does have the worst of the potential Dark-Hunter spoilers, they relate to Jaden.

#invision #sherrilyn mcqueen #book review #chronicles of nick #sherrilyn kenyon #omg lilliana my queen i love so much #spoilers on goodreads #ktreviews #read 2021 #younglings

[puckngrind]

What’s In A Name:8 - J. Toews

Chapter 8

Where we left off: Bekah accompanied Jon to the NHL100 Gala and he suggested they could live in Chicago together.

Warnings: smut, language

Word Count: 3,396

Series Masterlist ) Puck ‘n Grind’s masterlist

Untitled.

His season ended in round 1 and anyone could see the disappointment all over Jon’s face for the first few weeks after being knocked out in four games. Bekah came to game 1 and wore the jacket he bought her with his name and number on the back. The conversation from LA still hung over their heads but was not discussed by either with the end of the season. Work was crazy for her and summer flew without seeing Jon much. She did take a Friday off in August to take the long weekend go see him at home in Canada. She could see why he spoke about home the way he did. It was peaceful even with the sounds of slap shots waking her up one morning. She toed out to the kitchen to see coffee already made and prepared to her liking of a splash of honey and cream. She hummed while taking the first sip realizing it was exactly how she made it. The large window in the back eliminated source of the sounds echoing through the house. Jon was working out on his mini rink in the backyard. She opened the door with nothing on but one of his old, warn UND shirts on.

“You are crazy Tae!” Bekah emerged with coffee in hand leaning on the railing of his deck. Jon laughs and starts to make his way to her.

“Determined is usually the adjective used Beks.” His sweaty lips dip down and brush against hers. “Determined. Also, good morning.”

He was very determined to get her to Chicago. He knew she loved the city but the conversation in LA was looming over every discussion of a weekend with him. It took a ton of effort for Brynn convincing Bekah to go for the Blue Jackets and Blackhawks game in October. She helped Bekah wiggle some of work accounts during a few lunches and wouldn’t stop talking about it until they booked their flight. Bekah was working so hard that she resisted at first but Jon was thankful for Brynn’s persistence got her to his city.

Brynn rolled her eyes when Bekah walks in from the parking garage in her playoff jacket within Toews airbrushed across the back and a I heart Chicago T-shirt under. “I’m happy for you friend but you are an Ohioan damnit!” Brynn laughs and links arms with Behkah so they can head to the arena.

Jon scored and had an assistant handing the Blue Jackets a lose. Brynn laughs as the two friends embrace near the locker rooms and head their separate ways. “Have fun you two.” She waves more at Jon than Bekah.

“Nice game Tae.” Bekah looks up at Jon as he takes her under his arm.

“I felt your energy, Baby.” He kisses her lips. “Let’s head home.” The words lingered but weren’t touched by either one.

Bekah loved the way Jon smelled post game. It was intoxicating especially as he pressed into her making her legs push hard into his ass while she moaned out his name loudly.

“Come on Beks.” Jon encourages feeling Bekah’s orgasm coming. His not far behind. Bekah’s back arches up and he works faster. Reveling in the way their bodies moved in sync.

“Jon, I...” She moans out while her toes curl tightly into his legs.

“Merde Beks! Je t'aime.” Jon grunts out as he climaxes and collapses into Bekah’s trembling body.

“Uh, what did you just say?” Bekah tries to catch her breath. “Tae?” Jon whinces realizing the gravity of his words. “Jon.” Bekah tries to move him but he just lays with his head in her neck attempting to catch his own breath. “Jonathan! What the hell did you just say?”

“It was French Beks.” He finally moves so she can see his face.

“You orgasmed in French? You’ve never... have you ever... wait. What did you say?” Bekah questioned.

Jon’s mind and heart are racing. Of course he loved her. But saying it in French while cuming wasn’t exactly the way he wanted to tell her for the first time especially when they hadn’t established anything beyond exclusivity. “Babe, I don’t know.” He rubs the back of his neck.

“I swear I heard t’aime. Isn’t that love?” Bekah feels the heat coming to her cheeks. Her hand swiping at sweat on Jon’s hairline.

“Beks. Maybe. I don’t tend to remember what we say in the moment. Plus my brain is hardwired for both languages. Remember, I learned French first.” Jon searches her eyes and sees a smile appear.

“Well that was new. I didn’t hate it but it was new.” She kissed his lip tenderly. “Does it mean something when you brain switches like that?”

“I don’t think so mainly comfort I guess but we’ve been pretty comfortable for awhile. Seriously Beks. I don’t think I’ve ever done it before, ever.”

“Interesting.” Bekah struggled her shoulder out of not understanding before kissing his lips and Jon was thankful for the dropped conversion.

Work picked up for Bekah again. Her firm was given the task of the Cannonball for the CBJ foundation. As the marketing department she was stressed. She took a few days at Christmas and spent them in Chicago. His family didn’t join this year because of the schedule but he was thankful to see her in the mist of maybe her biggest project yet. All-Star break came and went. Jon didn’t make the All-star team so he came to Columbus and spent time with her but mainly in bed then she was off to work. Brynn didn’t mind when he suggested lunch out and invited her knowing they had a standing lunch date.

The week of Cannonball Brynn walks in with flowers. “These were delivered for you.” Bekah could hardly see her tiny best friend over the ginormous bouquet. Bekah’s eyes bug out of her head when her eyes adjust to them. She has only received flowers once at her office and it was when her grandfather died and they were from Brynn and Derek not her boyfriend. Jon sent her flowers for her birthday but to her apartment and not to work.

“Holy shit Rin!” Bekah gets up to grab the flowers and places them on the ledge behind her desk.

“There is a card.” Brynn points towards the center of the roses. “I didn’t read it. Still sealed.” Brynn’s face lights up as Bekah fishes out the note and opens it.

To the purrdiest lady at the ball,

You have worked so hard and I’m so proud of you.

Always, Tae

Bekah’s heart skips a beat and her face has a smitten smile across it.

“Does he always end his notes that way?” Rin questions.

“What? Huh?” Bekah rereads the card and looks at her best friend puzzled.

“Always, Tae. Does he always sign things like that?” Bekah just nods gliding her fingers over the text. “Very similar to that tattoo you have isn’t it.” Brynn flicks her finger to Bekah’s left side where the Always yours tattoo was.

“He’s done it before seeing the tattoo.” Bekah’s brain remembering the note she kept in her wallet from when he gave her his jersey. Butterflies erupt in her stomach thinking about the similarities.

“Yeah, just adding to the list of your no name thing there Bekah.” Brynn breaks the silence caused by Bekah’s realization. “Those flowers are stunning! I’m gonna let you call that handsome man.” Brynn waves from the door and Bekah turns to inhale the arrangement of red and white roses.

She picks up her phone and calls Jon.

“You didn’t have to but they are beautiful. Thanks Babe.” Bekah hardly let’s him say hello.

“Oh, well deserved. You worked your ass off for this western rodeo campaign and I just wish I could be there to push you across that dance floor, Beks.” There was a silence that they both let happen.

“I miss you.” Bekah finally whispers.

“I miss you too Beks but I gotta go. I’ll talk to you later.”

Cannonball got Bekah all nervous. She ended up wearing the same dress that she did for the NHL 100 gala with some major convincing from Brynn. “You worked hard, that dress is amazing why not wear it and we can enjoy ourselves.” It definitely didn’t go with the theme and Bekah considered if it was too much for an event she was technically at for work. The fundraiser was perfect. Being country themed the players showed up in hats and bolo ties. About half way through Bekah felt the weight of the project lift off her shoulders as she started to mingle among some of women from the Chicago trip and the team. Her comfort level in the hockey world had dramatically changed and even Seth Jones noticed it when they were talking. He had run into her and Jon at the All-Star game in 2017 that became the focal point of the conversation. Bekah crawled into bed way later than she expected and didn’t wake up until her phone was ringing before her alarm.

“Hey Tae!” Bekah knew it was only Jon calling that early.

“Why the fuck do I see Josh fucking Anderson’s arm around you on Twitter?” Jon chokes out through his teeth.

“Huh?” Bekah sat up and rubbed her eyes.

“I was looking through the tag from your event and scrolled to see a picture of that cocky new call up Jacket with his fucking arm around you. Bekah... I... I....”

“You need to breathe Jon. No one had their arm around me especially Josh.” Bekah grabs her tablet from the nightstand to find this picture. The mention of Josh’s name made Jon almost growl.

“Well it sure as hell looks like he’s all cozy with you.” Bekah can tell Jon is pacing the floor. She hears the hard thud of his feet even over the phone.

“Jon! We. You and me, we are exclusive. I’m not seeing or talking or flirting with any other man.” Bekah scrolls as Jon breathes heavily into the phone. She finally sees it. From the angle of the photograph it does looks like Josh’s arm is on the small of her back and not whatever he was propping himself on. A small smirk on Josh’s face as she is talking to Seth. “Jon, Honey, I’m looking at the picture right now and I was just talking to the boys. Seth was asking about what part of the All-Star game I enjoyed since he saw us in LA. The conversation was about YOU,Tae.” Bekah waits and hears Jon swearing in both French and English. “Jonathan Bryan Toews calm the fuck down. You have a game tonight and you cannot be all like this.”

“Like fucking what Bekah? Pissed that my woman is looking like she’s talking to another man and one that is in my profession and one that I have to play soon. Pissed that we won’t call this what it fucking is because we live in different states or are scared or whatever it might be? My head hasn’t been in the right space and it’s hard to lead a damn team when I’m this way.” Jon stops pacing and can hardly hear over booming from his pulse in his ears.

“I... I don’t know what to say Jon.” Bekah feels the prick at the corner of her eyes.

“Well maybe you need to figure that out. I need to get to the rink and settle down. I’ll talk to you later Beks.” Jon hisses and hangs up. Bekah pulled her pillow over her head and starts to cry. She wasn’t even sure why she was crying but she just did it. Jon’s word echoing in her thoughts as she did.

The two texted a few times in the next few weeks and even Brynn could feel there was something off. “Bekah, he’s coming in town tomorrow night after their home game. You need to talk to him.”

“Rin, please don’t.” Bekah looks up from the salad she’s just pushing around with her fork.

“Call what you two have whatever you want but it’s something and in the last few weeks you’ve been a puddle of a human instead of the annoyingly hot for Toews bestie I’ve come accustomed to. You two make each other better you know?” Brynn stares into her best friend’s eyes seeing all the confusion that was stirring.

“But Rin.” Bekah whispers.

“Just go talk to him.” Byrnn spells out and Bekah knew she was right.

She texted Jon asking to meet in the lobby. He said he had a late team meeting but could slip out for a moment. Bekah’s heart beat faster and her cheeks flooded red when she sees him walking towards her.

“Hey Beks.” Jon leaned down and kissed her forehead.

“I’ve missed you.” Bekah blurts out.

“I’ve missed you too.” Jon stands close but not too close. “What’s up?”

“We haven’t seen or talked to each other in awhile.”

“Yeah, we’ve been busy.” Jon rubs the back of his neck looking down at her and she sees his pocket buzz.

“I... I... fuck... why is this hard?” Bekah whispers almost to herself as Jon’s pocket buzzes again.

“Beks, I don’t know but I really have to go. Tomorrow night, after the game I’ll meet you down in the tunnels like always okay?” He dips down and kisses her cheek before jogging off.

Bekah shook off the odd exchange and the next day wore her Toews jersey as she had been doing the last few seasons. Brynn’s eyes were bright when she got into Bekah’s car and saw the familiar jersey but said nothing. The ladies were closer than normal for this game and when Jon skated by during warmups she saw a slight smile across his face.

The game was not great and Bekah could swear she saw Jon push Josh after the whistle and words were exchanged but when Brynn said she didn’t see anything she wrote it off as paranoia. The Blue Jackets won and when Anderson scored in the third Bekah felt Jon’s eyes on her while the entire arena erupted in cheers. After the game, as always, Bekah waited for Jon between the home and visitor’s locker rooms. Bekah getting chirped by a few of the player who saw her in the Toews jersey and recognized her from Cannonball. Bekah sees Jon and starts toward him. His expression soft as he makes his way to her.

“Bek-caw!” A booming voice behind her calls out. She turns to see Josh with his hands to his mouth.  Seth, and Boone behind him in the tunnel. The boys all wave and she waves back then turns to see Jon standing in front of her. A grimace now flooding his face.

“Ready?” Jon pulls his arm tight around Bekah and she felt his whole body was tense.

“Yes, Tae. Let’s get outta here.” Bekah squeezed Jon and the two made their way to his hotel room. Once inside Jon drops on the bed kicking off his shoes but fully clothed in his suit. “I’m sorry Tae.” Bekah curls up into him and she can feel the tension radiating out of him. Jon finally groans and moves their bodies. Stripping Bekah’s clothes off first then his own in almost silence. Just the sounds of movement and kisses filled the air. He slinks down her body and presses his tongue into her core.

“Fuck Jon!” Bekah jumps and he presses his hand down at her hips to keep her body in place. He’s relentless and doesn’t let up after an orgasm rips through her body. His fingers curling into her as he sucks and flicks at her clit. Bekah yells out his name as the second orgasm crashes over her with even more of an intensity than the first. Jon only let’s up for a moment while he adjusts her legs and slams his throbbing cock into her. The room now filled with curses and moans. Jon biting at Bekah’s shoulder while she claws at his back. He thrusts hard into her then stops. Her eyes that are screwed shut fly open and the intensity of Jon’s eyes was a lot to take. Pupils blown, the look of want and a hint of something she couldn’t put her finger on before he rolled his hips out and slammed back into her. Bekah’s hands fly up to brace herself with the headboard. Jon’s hands move so he’s on his elbows with his lips ghosting her lips. “Mine.” He whispers then presses his lips on hers. Bekah feels Jon twitch deep inside of her which causes her body to climax again. Jon rolls off of Bekah. His hard expression softens and he kisses her then heads to the bathroom. She expects him to return but when the shower turns on she pads over to the bathroom.

“Tae?” Bekah looks into the shower and Jon’s forehead is pressed against the tile and the water is running down his back. He doesn’t move or answer. “Baby?” Bekah enters the shower and wedges herself between the shower wall and his body. Jon’s eyes closed and her hand comes to cup his cheek. “Jon?” Bekah runs her thumb across his cheek.

“I’m sorry Beks.” He opens his eyes and looks at her.

“Sorry for what?” She keeps her hand in place and blinks the spray from her eyes.

“For everything Beks. For everything but I’ll start with my behavior in bed just now.”

“Jon.” Bekah goes to kiss his lips and he moves.

“Let me finish. I got jealous. I got pissed off. I didn’t talk to you. I have let you and my team down. I just...” Jon takes a deep breath.

“Jon, let’s get out of the shower and talk okay?” Jon nods his head and let’s Bekah lead him out. She dries them both off and snuggles into his chest in bed.

“I’m sorry.” He says again and runs his hand down and up her arm then pulls her body flush with his.

“You keep saying that.”

“I mean it.”

“And the jealousy thing?” Bekah looks up at him.

“I couldn’t see beyond a poor camera angle and got angry that these local guys could see you almost daily. That they could easily have you if they wanted to.”

“But they don’t and they won’t.” She reassures him. “And the whole mine thing?” Bekah whispered out and rubs her shoulder.

“Fuck Beks did I hurt you?” Jon kisses the spot that already looks like it’s bruising.

“It was in the heat of the moment and I’ll be fine. But Mine Jon? The possessive sex thing isn’t exactly you.”

“I know. I just... fuck.... fuck... fuck.”

“You fuck?” Bekah laughs. Jon sits up on his elbow and looks down at Bekah.

“Bekah. I love you and I know we said we aren’t naming this but I love you and I’m a fucking idiot for not telling you this years ago.” Jon leans down and kisses her lips.

“Jon...” Bekah breathes out.

“And not just love. I don’t want to live without you honestly. When we leave each time it gets harder. When that hint of cinnamon smell from your pillow is gone I find myself in the kitchen trying to replicate it but it’s your smell. You. I want you. I want you to come to Chicago, run my new foundation, build a life with me, together. Je t’aime Rebekah. I said it once before and didn’t realize then that I meant it but I do.” He drops back down so their faces are inches apart.

“Jon.” Bekah places her head on his chest. He combs his fingers through her wet hair.

“You don’t have to say anything Beks. I don’t want you to say it back unless you mean it. I’m okay with being just this. Okay? Just know that’s what I want is more and if you don’t then we keep doing what we are doing but if you consider even a little bit of what I just said that we can start slow and not all at once. I’m in this for the long haul Beks.” He hand glides under her chin and slowly moves it to look her in the eyes and kisses her lips again.

“Okay.” Bekah quietly says.

“Okay? Okay to what Beks?”

“Okay....”

#what’s in a name fic #WIAN #jonathan toews fic #jonathan toews #tazer me 19 #love a damn blackhawk 🤦🏻‍♀️ #happens in the 2017 2018 season #j toews fic #j toews

[tortuerex]

My honest, humble, and not-objective-at-all opinion about LORDS OF THE SITH

LORDS OF THE SITH by Paul S. Kemp, published in 2015 (canon)

Real quick plot summary : The Free Ryloth Movement, led by Chad Syndulla, attempts a massive attack on the imperial forces, in hope of killing Darth Vader and the Emperor and strike a fatal blow to the Empire. Things didn't exactly go as planned.

I've FINALLY managed to finished the book, started weeks (months?) ago. Actually, I finished it less than 15 minutes ago. And I really enjoyed it. So why did it took me so long ? I'll go back to that point later.

First of all, let me tell you I didn't exactly found in this book what I expected to find. And in a good way. Judging by the cover and the resume, I was prepared for a book mostly about the Emperor and Vader, but I'd say approximatively half the book is about them directly. (I mean, with the exterior narrator talking about them.) The rest of the book is about Cham and his movement, the Twi'lek rebels, and his relationship with Isval. And Isval was my favorite character in the book, she was really well written and her story is so interesting. Kemp managed to bring so more life in all these secondary characters.

I'll try to be cohesive because since I've just finished the book but begun it long ago, I have to go back to my notes about the first half.

I've loved learning things about the Twi'lek's history and traditions. I finally know why some male twi'leks have sharpen teeth and not female ! (In case you don't know, well, that's tradition. But Isval sharpened hers to show she's a hunter too.)

The whole passage of the book with Isval going downtown to literaly hunt imperials and save prostitutes Twi'leks gave me goosebumps. Definitively not a thing I was expecting in a « Sith Lords » book, but it was awesome, so dark, so shady, I was feeling the unhealthy atmosphere of the district. First I was thinking « Ok, he's suggesting she's a former sexual slave and that this is the kind of district these things happen in. » And then I was like « Ok that's not suggested anymore, that's pretty explicit right now. » I didn't expect a Star Wars book to talk to me about sexual abuse and prostitution, but boy it was so strong and hard to read.

And to be honest, I'm really thankful to Kemp for not being patronizing about it. Isval is not a broken little thing, she's a warrior, she had a really bad time in her life, and now she's fighting to help other girls, and she's fueled by hate.

And about Isval, her relationship with Cham was really touching as well. We kinda see it grows before our eyes, not invading the mission nor polluting their discussions, but slowly showing more and more, from chief to subordinate, friend to friend, freedom fighter to freedom fighter, and finally acknowledging that from the very beginning, they were more than that but never had the opportunity to take their chance.

We'll talk a bit about the Sith side of the book too. It was very enjoyable. Exploring the relation between Vader and the Emperor felt like a force hand tightening your chest. The Emperor is perpetually testing Vader (and everyone else). Everything he does, everything he says, has a purpose. This man isn't tied by the mortal rules of luck and probability. Everything is planned and calculated. And Vader knows it. Every word the Emperor speak has a reason, and Vader is like « What did he mean ? » and then « Ok, that's what he meant. »

Vader having flashes of his past life, his former friends, the Clone Wars, Padmé... Every one was heartbreaking and the Emperor KNOWS it. He used them, to keep Vader hateful, to constantly remind him he's a tool of a greater force, and every sentences he said could have been finished by « So... who's the boss ? ».

He's the boss.

You can feel how strong and inflexible they are, there is so many good descriptions of their strenght and determination.

A bit about the secondary characters : I liked Belkor, he was interesting. I liked seeing how he slowly turn insane through the book, ending up talking to a corpse. He's the opposite of the Emperor, having to constantly change his plans depending on other people or just because of misfortune, being manipulated and mocked, and finally snapping out of his mind because of pressure.

Moff Mors was cool too. I would have love to learn more about her, about her past life, but the little we know about her explains perfectly who she is. I felt a little frustrated by never knowing what happen to her at the end, because I personnaly doubt the Emperor will forgive years of non-interference and laziness (damn she was supposed to handle Ryloth!). It's implicitly said she's redeeming herself, but seriously, Palps, do you even redeem bro ?

My biggest problem with this book can be resumed in one word : LYLEKS. The passage with the Emperor and Vader fighting Lyleks was way way way way too loooooooong. I really felt it like a break in the momentum. And speaking of break, I had mine at this point. Bad luck, but hard weeks of work happened at this moment in my life, I had to put the book down while reading this passage, and it was hard coming back to it. Everytime I was reopening the book and seing the Lyleks everywhere I was like « Nobody got time fo' that ». It was a real let down.

To be honest, it almost felt like this whole passage was added in the book completely artificially. Like Kemp has finished his book and the editor said « Hey man that's a cool book you wrote, but what about more Sith kung-fu fighting ? Like, maybe, 40 pages of it ? »

It felf so weird and useless compared to the rest of the book. So unnatural. And it's the only part of the book where I've found severe incoherences. Vader deigniting his lightsaber two times on the same page (without having turning it on in the meantime), and few pages later the same thing but this time with igniting it. Like this passage was rushed and hadn't been seriously reread and corrected.

This was a serious problem because as soon as I've finished the Lyleks passage, and Vader and Palps were running into the young Twi'lek girl in the forest and then heading toward her village, the tension was back again, the apprehension of what was going to happen next, and everything then come one after another very smoothly and I was trapped again in the suspense.

So WHY ? Why would you stop this so effective momentum with an endless fight when we all know the outcome of the fight ?

This being said, what would be my opinion on Lords of the Sith ?

PRO :

- So much characterization. Every character is unique, even the secondary ones. Every motivation, backstory, personnality is understandable and relatable. That's for me the strongest force of the book.

- A good story. That may sound stupid but it's not. Writing a original story in a so vast universe isn't easy. You can't just repeat things that have aleady been told in another Star Wars media, you have to be creative. In this book the stakes are high for the heroes, but may seems lower on the scale of the galaxy. The whole point is... will it be the case ?

- The suspense. Like I've already said, having appealing secondary characters is a licensed book is super important to keep the suspense. Sure, Palps, Vader and Cham won't die. But you don't know about the other ones. And you care about them. You've learnt to know them, to love them.

CON :

THE LYLEEEEEEEEKS

TO CONLUDE :

A very important book to read. Don't expect to see crazy sith things all the time like you may think you will because of the cover. You'll see some sith shits (like Vader boarding a enemy ship alone in deep space), but that's not what important (yet that's impressive, to say the least). You'll learn about Vader, how he feels, his anger, his neverending pain, you'll learn about life on Ryloth, slavery, humiliation of having your planet under imperial jurisdiction. You'll learn about imperials too, human being working for the Empire, how they feel too, their backstory, how they are not just bad guys in uniform blindly following orders.

That's a very deep book for so many reasons (except Lyleks.)

I hoped you liked this review, I'm sorry about the time it took me to write it down. I may take a break because the next book I'll read won't be a Star Wars book (but a book lended to me by a friend so I have to finished it to give it back).

With the hot days slowly returning I have hope to read more seriously in the times to come, because one thing I enjoy is reading in the sun, but as always I won't make any promises I can't keep. I still have to write some reviews for old books I've read (Dark disciple, Wrath of Darth Maul, Ahsoka...) and still got new books to read (including Bloodline), but they will come in time.

As always, take care of yourself, of your surroundings, and enjoy :) Tagging @maulpunk !

#starwars #star wars books #dark vador #palpatine #twilek #lordsofthesith

[sinsdaycorp]

Would u be willing to list below some of the avalance fanfics?

Sorry that it’s taken me so long to answer this, I haven’t been on a laptop in a long time so I haven’t had a chance to really look at my inbox… 

So, this has also given me a good reason to go through my bookmarks and reread some Avalance (:

Hope these recs are good!!

– –

Forever with No matter where you are (I’ll be there) - moonlitprincess

“She remembers the day Sara changed her name in Ava’s phone, remembers the way the late morning sunlight had streamed in through the windows and fallen on Sara’s bare back so that her skin was warm to the touch, remembered the way the sheets had bunched at Sara’s hips as she lay on her stomach, Ava’s phone in her hand and scrolling through contacts until she reached her own name.

“What are you doing?” Ava murmured, reaching out to trail her fingers lightly over Sara’s spine.

“Changing my name on your phone,” said Sara, locking the phone and tossing it back onto the pillow between them. “I’m now your little bird.”

Ava chuckled, leaning forward to press a kiss to Sara’s shoulder. “Why?”

“So if either of us ever get caught, you won’t get implicated as being associated with Sara Lance.””

OR

an avalance ocean’s 8 au.

– – 

Guns hidden under our petticoats - plinys.

Ava is certain that this is a joke, and if not, the worst possible assignment the Time Bureau has ever given out. The assignment of monitoring Sara Lance - future threat to all of time and history, and currently Starling City’s very own Black Canary - certainly isn’t what she had been hoping for when she’d been promoted, but Ava’s determined to stick to the non-interference rules and make the most of it. Though Sara has been known to throw a wrench into many people’s carefully made plans.

– –

A million miles away - plinys.

Sara upgrades her phone to the latest OS - meant to be innovative enough to seem nearly human - and finds herself falling for the voice that’s always in her ear.

(A Her. AU)

– –

Forever with your hands in my pockets - plinys.

“If only there was something I could do to help my grade,” Sara says, her voice sugary sweet, “I’d do just about anything?”

“Well, you could start by doing your homework.”

(Or: Sara’s five step plan to seduce her political statistics TA into giving her a good grade.)

– –

Summer slipped us underneath her tongue - plinys

“Wait, you didn’t think that I wore my Bureau suit around the house, did you?”

– –

Silence - plinys.

“We should play a game,” Sara insists.

“How about the silent game,” Ava suggests.

– –

BASICALLY ANYTHING BY PLINYS!!! 

– –

Don’t you like you, cause I like you - CoffeeAndArrows, moonlitprincess

But before Ava can turn to run away from the door, it swings open to reveal Sara Lance standing in front of her. Her hair is bundled into a messy bun on the top of her head, two stray strands framing the sides of her face. She’s wearing a SCHS soccer hoodie and skin tight shorts that only come halfway down her thighs, revealing muscly, freckled legs that Ava has to work very hard not to look at. Her feet are adorned with grey fluffy socks which Ava is avoiding calling adorable in her head in fear of starting to associate Sara with any word remotely cutesy and affectionate.

Sara’s expression is genuinely surprised for several moments, eyes wide and startling blue. Her lack of makeup and the dim, golden light of the corridor highlight the freckles that are littered across her face.

Her eyelashes are really blonde, thinks Ava. How did I never know her eyelashes were blonde?

OR

a high school au in which sara and ava have been each other’s arch nemesis since freshman year, but when ava’s parents react badly to her coming out, it’s sara’s doorstep that ava shows up on when she doesn’t know what to do.

– –

The day before you came - Phoebmonster

“So, the brief is …” She tapped her fingers on the wheel. “Make your Mom believe you’re really gay and give you some peace and quiet next year.”

Ava nodded, and Sara grinned.

“Right, I can do that.” She said, more to herself than anything.

aka the ‘i’ve hired you to pretend to be my partner to annoy my family at christmas but i think i’m really falling for you’ AU that Absolutely no one asked for.

– –

Cause I see sparks fly (whenever you smile) - mrsavalance.

“Excuse me, one of the flight attendants said that this seat was still free. Is that correct?” You are frozen in place when you find Sara Lance staring at you with those piercing blue eyes. You cannot help but stare at them. They seem to appear to be even bluer now that she is standing right in front of you, than they are on screen. You quickly avert your gaze to the empty seat next to you, which you had placed your bag upon as soon as you figured out that no one was going to sit there, and if she noticed you staring, she doesn’t comment on it at all, which you are immensely grateful for.

or

The Avalance celebrity au, nobody asked for.

– –

i just wanna spend the nights with you - moonlitprincess.

based on a tumblr ask: “i had been on a few casual dates with this girl and we went back to my place yesterday and we were gonna y’know…fuck for the first time. anyway she takes off her shirt and it turns out she has a six pack (an honest to god could grate cheese on it six pack) and i was so surprised/turned on that i couldn’t breathe and passed out, hit my head and she had to drive me to the er. i have 4 stitches. she’s probably never gonna call me again lmao”

OR

college au where ava is only MILDLY crushing on campus heartthrob sara lance and can totally 100% be chill with a casual hookup … until she realises sara has abs. (ft. our favourite ladies being useless gay disasters & plenty of unexpected feelings)

– –

The One With the Bet - WardenRoot.

Ava loses a bet to Sara, the terms of which states that the loser has to do whatever the winner says

– –

Scars - WardenRoot.

Ava sees Sara’s scars for the first time

– –

What if I’n weak and I need you tonight - WardenRoot.

Ava finds Sara crying in her room after a not so successful mission and tries to comfort her.

– –

Will You Be My (Fake) Wife? - WardenRoot.

“So what you need from us is a date?”“A fake spouse, yes.”

When an object from the future gets displaced, Ava needs the help of the Legends to go undercover and retrieve it

– –

So, I guess I’m trying to say, anything by WardenRoot also? 

– –

Sweet Girl - TML9115

Sara is turned into a five year old. The legends with the help of Gary convince Ava to watch her.

– –

More than a Clone - StoryChanger

Ava is attacked in her own apartment and barely escapes to the Waverider. Sara and her team work together to figure out why she was attacked and discover that someone close to Ava maybe a traitor.

– – 

The Holiday Party - ffgirl21

In a last ditch effort to help Sara get over her recent breakup, Laurel drags Sara to her law firm’s Thanksgiving party where she runs into Ava Sharpe, a corporate lawyer at Laurel’s firm.

– – 

Nailing The Canary - notthegoblin

Ava Sharpe is a spy tasked with capturing the elusive Canary. Can she keep focused on her mission when Sara Lance catches her eye?

– –

A Special Kind of Real Fake Love - karadanverz

In order to catch a time-traveler that’s trying to erase the Time Bureau from existence, Ava and Sara must go undercover at a couples retreat for a week so that they can catch him.

– –

Camp Waverider - Notabeautifullittlefool

The summer camp AU that I was literally the only one to ask for.

– –

all these roads lead back to you - Phoebmonster

She could feel it now, something that wasn’t there before, clear and mysterious like the pools of water in the caves, sat at the edge of her mind. If she just reached out -

(An artefact gives Sara and Ava the ability to read eachother’s minds. it goes about as well as you would expect.)

– –

So, I went through all my bookmarks and took out a lot of options from this list because they weren’t all complete. 

I hope you enjoy these fics, because I surely did! 

Also, if you have a twitter, there’s A LOT of SMAU’s on there that have me in stitches.

– –

https://twitter.com/jesmacalIans/status/1124792102557290498?s=20

– –

https://twitter.com/saviourxsara/status/1111513658209624065?s=20

– –

https://twitter.com/katlikescats_/status/1122598940162052097?s=20

– –

https://twitter.com/Iegendsofau/status/1038175307839225856?s=20

– –

https://twitter.com/plinys/status/1079173574781530114?s=20

– –

https://twitter.com/katlikescats_/status/1080932001941766144?s=20

– –

https://twitter.com/mrsavalance/status/1092893264473194498?s=20

– –

https://twitter.com/jesmacalIans/status/1080450697915781120?s=20

– –

https://twitter.com/jesmacalIans/status/1088810889632010240?s=20

– –

Hope you enjoy each and every one of these as much as I did. 

#Avalance #Asks #Avalance Fics #Avalance AU's #Sara Lance #Ava Sharpe #Fanfiction #bettertobebisexualxoxo #Long Post #fic rec #Avalance Fanfiction Rec #Avalance Fic Rec

[princesskokichi]

kokichi bringing shuichi back with the necronomicon

WE LOVE ANGST HERE GOOD KOKICHI SIMP ANON

also this is set place in a time where shuichi died in the killing game, and kokichi did not take it very well 

i wrote a short about how kokichi deals with shuichi’s death immediately after he dies, but it kinda sucks so i won’t be posting it unless i get quite a bit of feedback for it, but if you want the short, message me and i’ll send it to you ! 

also this is written in paragraph form and not listed butttt you know how it be - mod kokichi

It was completely unlike him to seek refuge in something as stupid as the Necronomicon. After all, it was just so,, stupid, it was so stupid. He knew something like this wouldn't work, simply because it was impossible to raise the dead

Even though he knew that, why did he steal the book from Shuichi's room? And why was there a little doll made out of his bedsheets that he made all last night, sitting there staring at him with button eyes? With Shuichi's hat covering its entire face, the doll being far too small to actually wear Shuichi's hat, he set it upright on his bed, making sure that it wasn't going to fall over and potentially fuck everything up. He'd written Shuichi's name on the back of the doll in case monokuma or whoever the fuck was orchestrating this couldn't understand who he wanted to bring back

He wanted Shuichi Saihara back, more than anything else. He wanted him back more than he wanted to end this godforsaken killing game.

Kokichi had read and reread the rules over repeatedly in his head, trying desperately not to screw this up.

Not that it would work, of course.

Who would believe in such a stupid thing?

But when you're out of options, sometimes the things you have to stoop down to make no sense at all.

He carefully burned the entire book down into nothing but ashes, collecting those ashes into a small container he got from the kitchen area. Throughout this entire thing, he set his bars low, but still, there was this feeling in his heart that maybe, maybe this might just work. Maybe he could get his Shumai back.

God, this entire thing was so stupid, so why did he feel the need to continue?

Kokichi wanted - no he needed - to exhaust all options before giving up hope on Shuichi, and that wasn't like him at all. He was never one to cling to hope or belief. What happens in the world is what happens in the world and nothing will change that, but if blind and unnecessary hope could somehow bring his only friend back to life, then so be it.

So what if Shuichi had told him he was always going to be alone? Or if Shuichi most likely never thought about him like a friend but more as an enemy, just as everyone else did.

Whether Kokichi had lied to himself to believe Shuichi was his friend or not, he wanted him back. He,, needed him back. He needed Shuichi back so much, the desire wrapped around his heart and choked it mercilessly. Shuichi had to finish this killing game. He had to because no one else was going to be able to pull through. No one else could finish the killing game but Shuichi, the Ultimate Detective.

No, Shuichi wouldn't finish the killing game as the Ultimate Detective, but rather as himself. As the boy that liked reading novels at three a.m and could have been found at the library at any point in time if it wasn't for Kaede and Rantaro's deaths that still haunted him in his dreams. He was going to end this stupid fucking game as Shuichi. And Kokichi was determined to help, no matter the consequences of his actions.

If everyone else hated him in this game, if even Shuichi turned his back on Kokichi, he didn't care. Getting the only trustworthy person to play this game alive again was the only way.

Because of this need, he continued overworking himself, although he didn't know he was overworked or mentally exhausted. As an all-nighter turned into an all-weeker, and now he'd come to the only conclusion that he could think of and it was nearing its final stages, he didn't know that he was running on nothing but the sheer hope that this works.

As he sprinkled the ashes over the effigy he'd created, and repeated Shuichi's name three times, just as it was told in the Necronomicon. This was the hard part, the waiting.

Kokichi closed his eyes tightly, resting his head on his bed. He was afraid to talk or think about anything other than resurrecting Shuichi in case it screwed everything up.

He waited.

And waited.

He must've been waiting like that for at least an hour or so because the sun was rising up from his window, not that he could see it. Kokichi breathed out a sigh, and as he opened his eyes, he felt a light tap on his shoulder.

" Uhm-"

He spun his head around, coming face to face with the person he'd been trying so hard to bring back.

" Saihara-chan- You're-"

"I'm sorry, do I know you? Where am I, actually?" Shuichi looked around the room, his eyes wide as he tried to take in all of the strange objects around him that Kokichi had collected and put in his room. "Uh, last I checked my teacher said I was going to school. This isn't,, a school. So where am I?"

"You're in my room, Saihara-chan. You're the transfer student at this fucking school. You're the Ultimate Detective, you know."

"I am? Last I checked I was just a regular high school student."

"No, you just haven't gotten your first memory, I swear. This will all start to make sense when we talk to Monokuma and-"

"Mono,,, Monokuma? What kind of name is that?"

It took at least three days for Shuichi to finally be able to introduce himself back into the group. There was so much that he needed to learn in such a short amount of time that he was practically confined to the classroom in the beginning of the hallway the entire time, only really allowed to eat some food and sleep when nighttime came. Because of the short time frame he had to learn everything, no one knew he was back in high school.

Kokichi didn't know how it happened, but during these three days, while Shuichi was learning stuff about the school and the way things worked around here, they almost became,, actual friends. Shuichi was leaning on Kokichi to explain what was happening around him when he didn't understand what the Monokubs or what Monokuma was talking about.

They truly bonded, probably. So why did Kokichi feel so bad?

Ah, yeah, because he brought him back into the killing game where Shuichi would live in agony until he found out how to escape. It was a cruel fate to put him back into, but Kokichi needed him there since he didn't know how to end the killing game himself, and as long as Shuichi was there, there wouldn't be any more killings, right?

Right?

There were expected conflicted reactions when Shuichi walked through the front door, wearing his hat to cover a little bit of his expression.

Maki and Kaito had the worst reactions though, screaming in horror once they saw Shuichi and realized that this wasn't an elaborately pulled prank; the Shuichi in front of them was the real Shuichi.

"Sh-Sh-Sh-Shuichi??" Kaito screamed, his face contorting to that hideous face he makes when he's terrified, "I thought- I thought you were dead."

Monokuma popped up out of thin air, scaring Shuichi shitless. "That's because the Necronomicon brought him back ~ ! Ah, isn't that fun? Perhaps it wasn't a waste of a motive at alllll!"

"H-holy crap the bear can teleport?? Why didn't you ever tell me this Oma-chan?"

Maki took a step forward, her hand up as if she wanted to touch his shoulder to make sure he was real. "Why- why are you talking to Oma like he's a friend? He- he-"

"Sorry, sorry! Nishishi~ It's not like I wanted to see your reaction or anything like that."

Shuichi's shoulders slumped down a little bit as he pouted and crossed his arms over his chest, "Jeeeez, Oma-kun, you're so mean sometimes."

This isn't Shuichi.

Kokichi scratched the back of his head, smiling, He teetered back and forth, shifting his weight between his feet and swaying his head a little bit. "Yeah, you're right. Hey, after this, want to go to the library? There are a few things I really want to check out there. Plus, I heard that there's lots of good novels."

"That sounds boring, but alright."

"Ah, then perhaps the gym? There's an awesome dojo around here."

"A gym? That sounds more entertaining, I say sure!"

Everyone had the same look of distraught strewn across their faces. Maki winced, clenching her fists tightly as she shied away from everyone. Kaito's eyes were cast to the ground, unable to make eye contact with anyone in the room as he followed Maki out of the room silently.

Kokichi wanted to hide away forever, practically drowning in these overwhelming emotions that not even he could repress. He wasn't such an emotional person - that wasn't his character. So why did this revelation hurt so much? Was it because he was just playing dumb and trying to convince himself that it had worked? Was it because he lied, to himself and to the people around him?

And.

Who had Kokichi "brought" back to life?

#danganronpa #danganronpa v3 #v3 killing harmony #danganronpa v3 killing harmony #killing harmony #kokichi oma #danganronpa kokichi #shuichi saihara #danganronpa shuichi #necronomicon #danganronpa imagines #imagines #mod kokichi

[i-just-tardis-blue-myself]

Hello, anon!!

I’m guessing you’re asking me this because of the post I made regarding ff the other night. The truth is, I didn’t get to read many whouffaldi fics in ff and I haven’t read a whole lot whouffaldi fics since then. I always circle back to the same authors and stories, because when I tried to read new stuff after it didn’t affect me the way they did back in the day.

So the four authors I mentioned in my early post are the ones I would recommend you to check out. They were, I dare say, the hottest whouffle writers at the time. They all started by publishing Eleven/Clara (good old souffez)  and Other Doctors/Clara fics, so if you ship “whouffle” and not only “whouffaldi” you’ll find a gold mine worth of fiction. They all ended up writing Twelve/Clara stories, but not as many with the exception of maybe C1araosw1ad who posted her last whouffaldi fic in 2019.

So that being said, here are my recomendations:

Frombluetored

Heartlines (rated T)

An unknown threat sucks the Doctor and Clara into a parallel universe and leaves them stranded. While biding their time, they encounter the Clara of that universe and her achingly familiar husband.

This story has an especial place in my heart because Heartlines takes place in the same universe of  “Of adoration and chaos” an Eleven/Clara fic written by the same author. I’d say “Of adoration” is one of the best souffez fics out there and you don’t need to read it to understand Heartines, but you’ll be missing a great piece of fiction.  

Everest (rated T)

AU. The Doctor, recently promoted to CEO after the early passing of John Smith, enters his new job with short-lived surety. And then he meets the COO, Clara Oswald, who's just as determined to show the Doctor who's really in charge as she is to show him he'll never live up to his predecessor. Unfortunately for them, control doesn't exist in matters of the heart.

This one contains heavy subjects, so if you aren’t comfortable with high rates of smut and unhealthy coping mechanism this story isn’t for you. This fic wasn’t an easy ride, but it was worth the effort.

Banged up ( rated M)

There were many things Clara Oswald expected when she entered prison. Catching the eye of the prison's most notorious inmate was not one of them.

I remember this fic being really, really sexy, but also sad and angsty af. It is also unfinished and you might want to avoid that level of masochism, but hey, where is the fun in that?

Paper machine (rated K+)

Clara Oswald's timeless relationship with the Doctor, as seen through the eyes of her smitten student.

This fic is so precious and adorable. I love it to pieces. It contains a bit of 11/clara too, like most of frombluetored  fics.

E1evenc1ara

In another life (rated M)

A collection of AU one-shots featuring Clara and the the Doctor (Ten, Eleven, and/or Twelve). These are all written in response to prompts supplied by my tumblr users, which will be displayed at the top of each story.

Listen, the second story broke me in million little pieces. I’ll never over that pain. Totally worth it tho.

Again, If you dig Eleven/Clara, I would recomend you to check out The IT guy and its sequel Postcards from New York  by the author.

Dreamcatcher (rated T)

This is supposed to be a doctor x clara but I couldn’t picture any other Doctor than Twelve. I’ll die on this hill.

Happy Endings (rated M)

The Doctor and Clara attend a Royal Wedding in the thirty-first century where they have a bit too much to drink.

They get drunk, they bang, the Doctor is a wrecked mess after, but everything turns all right. Pure bliss, my dudes.

D Veleniet

Hold onto me (rated K+)  

Clara stood frozen, reeling from too many emotions to even name. All she could do was stare. "Doctor?" She approached him slowly, carefully. "What's happened to you?" She swallowed against the grief that threatened to cloud her voice. "Why are you acting like this?"

The author wrote this fic in 2013, before series 8 aired and reader, the way she was on absolute point with Twelve’s characterization. I mean, Twelve being a grumpy old Scottish lil shit pointing out Clara’s physical “flaws” to deflect from the fact that he’s absolutely in love with her check. Twelve being a huge ass softie for Clara check. My heart being compromised by their dynamic and how much they love each other CHECK (also I’m so greatful Twelve never called Clara “wee” in the show, I would have slapped him)

Untouchable (rated M)

Clara stopped missing the touches, stopped smarting from his flinches when they would accidentally brush up against each other or bump arms. She stopped wondering what had changed so much inside him that had made her physically repulsive to him now. Then one night she agreed to a set-up on a blind date.

This is a sexy sequel for Hold onto me in which everything hurts, but also everything is very hot. So yeah, yeah.

This author wrote, problably the most famous eleven/clara fic back in the day : The other has my heart and its sequel More than you know They were litsed in every fic rec and rightly so.

C1araoswa1d

The Tethers Between Hearts (rated k+)

On a quiet little planet, the Doctor shares something very important with Clara.

If I could cover myself with this achingly soft piece of writing, I would. Because I can’t, I do the second best thing which is rereading it over and over, until I feel all warm and fuzzy inside.

Waking Dreams (rated T)

(Doctor Who AU) Life is complicated enough for Clara after an accident puts her young daughter in a coma, but through her only means of communication with the girl - an in-dream interface system - she's meets an odd company representative who promises to help her along, quite possibly in more ways than she could ever imagine.

Welcome to Angstown, populatiom : THIS FIC

A Mirage in Time  (rated M )

After Clara, the Doctor seeks out an Echo to help him move on… and finds himself just as perplexed by her and possibly just as in love.

I love C1araoswa1d’s writing so much, specially the way she depicts Clara. IDK man, part of my undying love for the character comes from the way she characterizes Clara in her stories. So yeah, please go and read all her fics. They are amazing, specialy How to fall in love with a time traveller and A path out of the dark

Bonus track, my dudes.

Anon, I know you asked me for my favorite ff.net whouffaldi fics, but I cannot left twelveclara out of this list. Her fics are iconic and you have probably read them, but fuck it.

History, like love

There are planets orbiting her eyes and her mouth tastes like the ocean; in her head she hears a shatter, like her soul has pried her ribs apart in a desperate, aching attempt to reach his. “If I could have picked anybody,” he murmurs, “it would have been you.”

My favorite soulmate au ever written in any fandom. periodt

But we’re so happy

from the outside looking in; so, maybe river’s right. people always stare at what they can’t touch.

punk rock au. Perfection in all its unfinished magnificence.

#whouffaldi #whouffle #souffez #fic rec

[perspective-series]

Injured Perspective (12/12) FINAL

By: @arc852 and @hiddendreamer67

Warnings:I think we’re gucci fam

First Chapter || Previous Chapter || Next Chapter

————————————————————————————-

 Patton sighed as tapped the pencil against the desk. He had a blank sheet of paper in front of him and he was trying to figure out how to word his apology the best. Should I start with dear, Logan? Or is that too formal. Maybe, hi, Logan? Ugh, why is this so hard.

 Patton had messed, he knew that now. But how did he put it into words. He put the lead to the paper and simply started to write. He didn’t let himself think much as he did, just letting his thoughts poor out on the page.

 When he was done, he read it over. He sighed, he hoped this was enough. He knew Logan probably would never forgive him but he had least wanted him to know he was sorry. He grabbed the note and looked around for where to put it. He ducked underneath the desk, thinking this was the best place and set it down there.

 He then stood up and grabbed his coat. He needed to get out of the house for a little bit. Besides, maybe if he was out then Logan would be more willing to come and see it.

Logan paused, having been watching through the vents. He waited until he was sure that Patton had truly left before he ventured down to read the note.

 Logan,

Hi, er, I don’t even know if you’re ever going to see this. You’re probably long gone right now, which I completely understand. I was...terrible. I had it set in my mind that I needed to protect you and that the only way to do that was to keep you here with me. Even...Even if it was against your will. But I realize now that I was wrong. It was wrong to trap you and keep you here, even when you were still sick. 

So, I just wanted to say that I am sorry. So, so sorry. I know you must have been pretty scared and I was a jerk for ignoring that fear. And for acting like I knew best. And treating you like a child.

  I’m sorry to Virgil too, for everything I did to him and making him worry about you. I’m glad Roman was a better person about all this. 

I wish I could make it up to you but I know the best way I can is to not bother you anymore. To try and forget this even happened. I promise, I will won’t come after you or Virgil. I’ll leave you alone.

  Love, Patton.

P.S. I am really really really really really really really sorry. :(

Logan read it and reread it several times before he decided he had analyzed every detail. Yet despite his thorough search, Logan still wasn’t sure what to make of the note. It certainly seemed sincere enough, and Logan appreciated the gesture.

Still...as Logan looked around the bedroom, he let out a small shudder. There was still that underlying fear that this was all just another trap to get Logan to come back. 

Committing the note to memory and scolding himself for staying out in the open so long, Logan went back into the walls.

------------------------------------------

 Virgil sat down on his makeshift bed, waiting anxiously for Logan to come back. He knew Logan would be able to tell right away that he didn’t pack, so he would have to jump into his plan to convince him right away.

 Hopefully he could.

There was a knocking at the door, Logan announcing his presence before coming in anyways. He looked around the room.

“...ah.” Logan said, his expression hard to read. It was clear he had guessed Virgil’s intentions.

 Virgil stood up. “Look, I know what happened to you was bad. I get that. But...I still think we’re safer here. If anything, Roman is there to help us out but even so I think he’s convinced Patton to leave us alone.” Virgil sighed. “A trip like the one we were going to take could very well kill us. It’s better if we stay here, where we already have a good system going, right?”

“You keep insisting Roman has been helping you out.” Logan remembered back to the human’s conversation before. “But how can we know for certain? They might seem apologetic, or sincere, but… I just don’t see how we can guarantee trust without putting ourselves at risk.”

 “Well...I’ve basically been putting myself at risk this whole time.” Virgil told Logan. “I’ve been in and out of Roman’s presence more times that I can really count, and trust me, he had plenty of chances to keep me. But he always just let me go, even if he didn’t agree with my plan.”

“But what about Patton?” Logan spoke almost timidly, still afraid of not Patton himself but what he was capable of doing again.

 “Roman said he had a change of heart and I trust him.” Virgil spoke, not wavering. “And if Patton was lying, I at least trust him to help us out again if he does try something.”

Logan was quiet for a moment, mulling this over, which was a good sign.

 “Please Logan, with Roman on our side, we’re safe here. Possibly more so then we were before all this.” Virgil said.

“I am...uncertain.” Logan said finally. “I know you, and I trust your judgement. But at the same time, I have concerns.”

 Virgil thought for a moment, thinking back to what Logan said. “What if you...came with me to meet him?” Virgil suggested hesitantly, bracing himself for Logan’s reaction.

Logan considered this. “You’re quite sure it’s safe?”

 Virgil nodded. “On my life.”

“Alright.” Logan nodded. “Then I shall accompany you.”

 “Okay.” Virgil said, hardly believing he had convinced Logan to actually meet Roman. “Let’s go then.” He started through the familiar pathway.

“What, right now?” Logan hesitated, standing in the doorway.

 Virgil paused, looking back. “Uh, yeah. No better time like the present, right? If...you know, you’re up to it?” Virgil asked.

Logan drummed his fingers on his leg, debating. When he finally decided it would be best to not delay, Logan took a deep breath and followed.

 Virgil shot him a smile and continued on, hearing Logan’s footsteps behind him the whole way.

 He paused at the entrance, turning to look at Logan. “Ready?”

“As ready as one can be, given the circumstances.” Logan nodded.

 He placed a hand on his shoulder. “It’ll be okay.” Virgil promised before he turned and pushed open the door, running out into the open and motioning for Logan to follow.

Logan ran after him, missing a step when he caught sight of the human in bed right there. It was jarring, willingly putting himself at such a high risk like this in the middle of the day.

 Virgil reached the nightstand first, climbing up it. He looked to Roman, who looked to be asleep, but he knew too well that looks could be deceiving. “Roman?”

As the human turned over, Logan took a startled step back, freezing when Roman opened his eyes.

“...oh!” Roman tried to keep his shock to a minimum, not wanting to startled Logan further. “I, ah, I see you were successful then.”

 “Yeah, kind of.” Virgil looked at Logan. “Logan agreed to come here and meet you. To see if we really are safe here.” He smiled at Roman. “I’m sure you’ll have no problem convincing him of that.”

“Absolutely!” Roman perked up. “Er, how, exactly, do I prove that?”

 “Uhh…” Right, how could Roman prove it. “We can start with questions? Logan, I’m sure you have some, right?”

“Ah, no, I’m content to observe.” Logan said, uncomfortable with the human’s attention on him.

“Sorry.” Roman winced. “There’s no need to be nervous, I swear on my honor I won’t harm either of you.”

Logan just nodded, not sure if he believed that but knowing the human wanted a response.

“Ah...would the two of you perhaps join me for breakfast?” Roman suggested. “Mayhaps I can win you over with my cooking skills.”

 Virgil snorted. “You do make some mean eggs...apparently.” He still didn’t really remember all that.

“Do you want a lift?” Roman was about to offer his hand, but paused. “Or, you can walk yourselves, if you prefer.”

“I prefer.” Logan assured him.

“That’s fine!” Roman hurriedly backed off on his offer. “Ah, in that case, I’ll just head to the kitchen. Any requests?”

 Virgil glanced at Logan and knowing this was supposed to be convincing, turned to Roman. “Actually, Roman, I’ll take that lift. If you’re still offering it.”

Roman looked uncertain. “Sure?” He slowly put his hand down on the nightstand, expecting Logan to run away at any moment.

Logan, to his credit, did not run.

 Virgil smiled and climbed on, looking back at Logan after he was settled. “We’ll meet you there?”

“No, I’ll… I’ll go with you.” Logan declared, not wanting Virgil to be alone.

“You don’t have to do that, Logan.” Roman assured him.

“It’s most efficient.” Logan spoke with the voice of a man whose mind is made up, and with determination he joined Virgil.

 Virgil smiled at Logan, placing a hand on his shoulder as he climbed on. “Proud of you, L.” He whispered. It was a big step, willingly putting your life in someone’s hands.

Roman was always cautious when carrying Virgil, but he was extra cautious this time knowing how crucial it was to win Logan over. He went slowly, making sure his crutches didn’t slide against the tile.

“There we are.” Roman joked, setting his hand on the dining room table. “Please exit the Roman express.”

 Virgil slid off and onto the table. “Thanks Roman.” He turned to Logan. “That wasn’t so bad, right?”

Logan nodded. There was actually something familiar about the action, actually. Despite everything, Logan only feared Patton because of his intent to keep Logan contained; the human had never harmed him. 

“Alright, some mean eggs, coming up!” Roman announced, turning instead to the stove.

 Virgil grinned. This was actually going pretty good so far.

 Unfortunately, it had to be ruined as there was a jingling of the doorknob. And that was all the warning they got before it opened. Revealing Patton.

 “Hey, Roman, I-!” Patton froze as he took in the sight before him.

“Patton.” Roman kept his voice level, carefully eyeing between Logan and Patton. “Now’s...not the best time.”

Logan felt his heart pounding, glancing to Virgil if they should run. This trip was about trusting him, after all.

 Virgil met Logan’s eyes and then went to Patton. Instead of backing away, he took a step forward. With Roman there, he felt braver.

 “Stay where you are.” Virgil tried.

 To his surprise, Patton nodded. “O-Okay, I won’t move…” Patton fidgeted with his shirt. He was happy to see Logan and even Virgil again...but the look of fear on Logan’s face told him that maybe he was better off just leaving. Although, he just promise to stay still.

“Is it better for Patton to leave?” Roman asked the borrowers directly. Honestly he thought so, but the way Logan hadn’t turned and bolted gave him hope.

 “It depends.” Virgil looked Patton in the eyes. “Are you here to take Logan back?”

 Patton’s eyes widened and he held his hands up in surrender. “No! No, I actually just came back to help Roman fix breakfast. I wasn’t even expecting to see the two of you here, b-but even so! I...I’ve realized my mistakes. I don’t want to keep you anymore, that was wrong of me. I actually wrote a whole note about it, maybe it would be better if I went and got it.” Patton murmured the last bit to himself.

“I read it.” Logan informed him, and he was surprised his voice didn’t shake.

 Patton’s eyes widened. “You...You did? Oh, uh, well...what-what did you...think?” Patton asked, nervous. Virgil looked at Logan questionably.

“I...thought it was sincere.” Logan admitted. “But I still have a large query of doubts, and I don’t think one note excuses your behavior.”

 Virgil nodded, Logan did have a point.

 Patton sighed. “I...I know.” Patton bit his lip. “Maybe...maybe we could talk about it?”

“Maybe you could join us for breakfast?” Roman suggested gently, encouraged by the way everyone was acting civil.

 Patton’s eyes widened. “Yeah! I mean, can I?” Patton asked, looking down at the borrowers.

 Virgil looked at him warily. “Logan? It’s up to you.”

“I think that’s acceptable.” Logan nodded. 

“Great!” Roman grinned, putting on some more food. 

It would certainly be a tense meal, but nonetheless Roman was looking forward to it. Despite Patton’s impaired view of borrowers, it seemed there was a chance to repair these friendships after all.

#injured perspective #perspective series #part 12 #another one bites the dust #borrower!virgil #borrower!logan #human!Roman #human!patton

[les-mis-still-makes-me-cry]

Lily Evans Definitely Has a Boyfriend Chapter 2

Enjoy! Chapter 1 is here

Every hour that passed seemed longer than the last. Lily was certain that Remus lived fairly close by, so she was on tenterhooks all afternoon, thinking at any moment Scarlett would flap back through the window. How long could one trip take?

Petunia asked Lily at dinner if she and her “boyfriend” (Lily could hear the quotation marks in her sneering voice) wanted to come to the dinner on Saturday, to which Lily replied that she was sure he would just LOVE to come, she’d just have to write to him and ask.

“Oh, how wonderful,” Petunia replied, sarcasm lacing every syllable. Lily quickly ran upstairs to pretend to write the letter, avoiding any further questioning about her secret relationship.

The sun was just setting when Scarlett returned. Lily raced to the window to catch her, frantically untying the thread attaching the letter to her leg. She started to open it, when she was distracted by Scarlett mercilessly nipping her finger.

“Ow, that hurts you daft- oh, I promised you a treat, didn’t I,” Lily realised. Scarlett hooted in affirmation, ceasing her assault when Lily laid out some of her favourite treats.

Lily quickly opened the letter and started scanning Remus’ neat handwriting.

Dear Lily,

My holiday was pretty standard until I received your letter, which I found highly entertaining. It’s probably not what you want to hear right now but this is possibly the funniest mess I’ve ever heard of you getting into, and that’s including that time you thought Slughorn was flirting with you. I’m still confused at how you supposedly hate your sister, yet want to spend days planning a wedding with her and her friends. You two make me glad I don’t have siblings.

I would love nothing more than to get involved and help you become a bridesmaid, however unfortunately for your plans, I can’t help you this Saturday. There’s a certain monthly engagement that I can’t cancel, as much as I would like to, and I’m sure you want to ensure your sister and her fiancé remain bite-free for their big day.

I hope you can find another actor to play the part, maybe Slughorn isn’t doing anything this weekend (one day I’ll maybe stop bringing that up, but it’s unlikely). Please do keep me in the loop and let me know how it all turns out.

Your friend,

Remus

P.S. Can I still claim on the grovelling some time?  The boys have something planned for the first day back and we could really do with a blind eye being turned. Don’t ask me anything else, I’ve been sworn to secrecy (but it’s mostly harmless, I swear).

Lily sighed in frustration and flopped back onto her bed. Dammit. She hadn’t checked her lunar chart since the astronomy exam in June so she had no idea the full moon was so close. She felt a pang of guilt that she hadn’t thought to check, knowing how much it hurt Remus being reminded of his condition, and knowing that she was one of the few people in the world he trusted to keep it secret.

She’d heard speculation about it for years from Snape, of course, but he was so obsessed with making those boys seem evil she had just put it down to overactive imagination at first. Over time though, she began to see how his theories might line up with reality, noticing the regularity of Remus’ visits home and his exhausted demeanour surrounding them. The fundamental difference between Lily and Snape, however, was that Lily simply didn’t see how it was any of her business. Remus was an alright bloke with terrible taste in friends, and that was all she needed to know.

Lily hadn’t even meant to let Remus know that she had guessed what he was. They were just finishing rounds together one Wednesday night, heading back to the common room after shepherding a sleepwalking Ravenclaw back to her tower. Remus stretched and yawned, already looking a little pale despite Lily’s calculations that the full moon wasn’t until next week.

“What- day are we- patrolling- next week?” he managed to say through his yawn.

“Tuesday, but I can get Marcella to cover you if you won’t be up to it,” she said without thinking, taking off her jumper now she was safe in the warm common room rather than the draughty corridor. When she got it over her face and saw Remus’ stricken expression, she realised what she had just said.

“I mean, not that you wouldn’t be up to it, can’t think of any reason you wouldn’t be okay next Tuesday-” she started babbling, before Remus cut her off.

“Did Snape tell you? He swore to Dumbledore that he wouldn’t say anything,” Remus’ whisper seemed tiny in the empty common room. His face had gone white despite the red glow of the dying fire.

“No, no, I haven’t spoken to him in months and even when I did he never said anything concrete, I just realised that his theory sort of made sense,” Lily quickly replied. Remus stared at her for a long second, biting his lip. He seemed to be trying to figure something out something very complex.

“But you’re still happy to patrol with me and stuff? I don’t want to make you do anything if you’re not comfortable being around… what I am… and I know it’s a lot to ask to not tell anyone, but Dumbledo-” He was cut off by Lily throwing her arms around him.

“Don’t be an idiot, Remus, I’ve known for months and it hasn’t stopped me being your friend. I would never tell anyone.”

After a moment’s hesitation, Remus’ arms closed around her and held on tightly.

***

Lily smiled at the memory, before the sinking feeling hit again, realising that she was still date-less for Saturday night. Remus would have been so perfect as well, she mused. Shame there would be no way of convincing Tuney to change the date, since Lily suspected that would simply result in her losing any chance of being a bridesmaid.

She reread Remus’ letter, hoping for guidance on what to do next.

I hope you can find another actor to play the part…

Who could she possibly get? Obviously, any muggle boys she knew from primary school were out, Petunia already knew them all better than Lily did. All the other Prefects apart from Remus were fairly good friends, but even Lily admitted they were a bit too… reserved for this kind of venture (she stopped herself from using the word dull). She didn’t know any of the Ravenclaw or Hufflepuff boys in her year well enough, and the one Slytherin she knew all too well was absolutely not an option. So that left her with just…

Lily put her head in her hands, finally reaching the conclusion she had been trying to avoid. She knew exactly who would love to pretend to be her boyfriend for an evening, hell, he’d be happy to do it for the rest of the summer. And Merlin knew he would love a chance to pull a prank on someone new, deprived of new targets being stuck with just his family all summer. And, Lily thought begrudgingly, he did have a sort of charm about him that tended to make people like him even when they were determined not to, which Petunia most definitely was. And he wasn’t as appallingly arrogant as he had been a year ago. And he wasn’t the worst-looking bloke in the world, although Lily would never have admitted that unless Veritaserum was involved.

“Fine,” she groaned, reaching for another piece of parchment. Her quill hovered over the page, wondering how to start this thing.

Potter,

She immediately vanished the word with her wand. She was asking a huge favour, now was not the time for surnames.

Dear James,

She vanished that too. She couldn’t have him getting the wrong idea before they’d even begun.

Why was this so difficult? She wondered. In person she seemed to have no issue talking to Potter, or indeed coming up with ever more creative ways to decline his proposals (although she was out of practise on that one). It must be the subject matter throwing her off, Lily convinced herself. After all, how often does one ask a boy who fancies you – or at least did for a while – to pretend to be your boyfriend?

Come on, Lily, it’s just Potter, she admonished herself. Get a grip. Dipping her quill back into the ink, she began to quickly write.

James,

It’s Lily. I know I’m probably the last person you expect an owl from in the holidays but I’ve got myself into a little bit of a pickle, and I think you’re probably the only person who can help me get through it.

I told my sister I had a boyfriend so that I could be a bridesmaid in her wedding. It’s a really long story, but that’s the gist of it. The issue is that I currently don’t have a boyfriend to go with to the dinner on Saturday night for the whole bridal party, and without going to that dinner I have no hope of being a bridesmaid, or ever having any sort of friendship with my sister again.

I am NOT (Lily underlined this twice) asking you to be my boyfriend, just to be clear. What I am asking, stupid as it sounds, is if you want to use your flair for drama for a good cause for once, and pretend to be my boyfriend for the evening. If your Saturday night is free and you fancy playing a Muggle at a nice restaurant, send an owl back as soon as you can.

If you say no I’ll just have to tell my sister you got dragon pox and died tragically this Wednesday out of the blue, and I’ll grieve you accordingly, but know that you’ll watched like a hawk for all of next year (Remus mentioned a certain first-day-back prank that you would very much like kept quiet. I’m not saying I would spoil it, but McGonagall may be pointed in the right direction. Yes this is blackmail, but desperate times, Potter.)

Anxiously awaiting your owl,

Lily Evans

That ought to do it, she thought. She folded up the letter, wrote James’ name on the front, and took it over to Scarlett, who twittered indignantly at being sent out again so soon.

“I know, I know Scar, but this really is urgent. I’ll give you as many treats as you can eat as soon as you’re back, I swear,” Lily pleaded. Scarlett stopped trying to flap Lily away, which she took to mean begrudging acceptance, and tied the letter to her. “It’s for James Potter, I’m sure you can find him.”

Scarlett immediately soared out the window, trying to get back as soon as possible for those treats. Lily marvelled for the thousandth time at how incredible it was that owls could find people so easily, despite Lily having no clue where Potter lived at all.

James, she mentally reprimanded herself. If he was going to be her fake boyfriend, she should probably start with civility. She wondered if this was a good idea after all. Would she even be able to convince Petunia that she was in a relationship with a boy she had been repulsed by the presence of just a year ago? Would he even want to do this with her?

Lily needed something to distract herself from her doubts. She decided to go downstairs and make herself a cup of tea before she tried (in vain, she suspected) to get some sleep. Making her way to the top of the stairs, she groaned inwardly seeing light still coming from the kitchen below. Lily prayed it was her mother, not Petunia.

Thankfully it was her mum, finishing up the last of the dishes from dinner. Lily breathed a sigh of relief and switched the kettle on, picking up a tea towel to help dry off the stack of wet dishes.

“Thanks, love,” her mum smiled, hugging her as best she could without getting her soapy hands on her daughter. “I thought something was maybe wrong earlier, you left dinner quite sharpish.”

“Yeah, I was just…” Lily struggled to think of what to say next.

“Too eager to invite that boyfriend to dinner?” Lily’s mum elbowed her, a knowing look in her eye. Lily welcomed her mother’s excuse.

“Yeah, I’m not sure how long the owl will take to reach him, I’ve not sent him anything before now,” she said.

“Ah, I did think it must be a recent thing. I couldn’t believe you hadn’t told me about him yet!” said her mum reproachfully.

“Ah well, with all the end of year madness to write about I guess I just didn’t think. Plus it wasn’t really such an official thing, it just kind of… happened,” Lily babbled, wondering how little she could say to satisfy her mother. Luckily, her mum was a romantic at heart, and anything Lily said was enough to make her mum sigh happily.

“That’s always the best way, isn’t it,” her mum said dreamily as she absentmindedly scrubbed at a saucepan. “Sometimes they just sneak up on you, and before you know it you’re in love.”

“I’m not in love with James!” Lily squeaked, shocked at the very idea. She cringed at her mum’s next words.

“Ah, maybe not yet, but it’s early days yet, dear,” Lily’s mum smiled. “And his name’s James, is it? That’s a nice name.”

“Yeah he’s… a nice boy,” Lily ventured, hoping her mum wouldn’t notice the twinge of sarcasm in her voice.

“Well I can’t wait to meet him. And I’m so glad you and Petunia are going to have the wedding to bond over, it’ll be a nice change from the bickering.” Her mum finished washing up and started putting away the dried dishes. Lily rolled her eyes.

“Yeah, like me and Tuney won’t find something new to fight about there,” she muttered.

“You two don’t know how lucky you are,” her mum said wistfully. “I always wanted a sister to dress up with, and talk about boys with, and-”

“Help each other sneak out of the house with,” Lily finished the speech for her. “Honestly mum, it just sounds like you think Tuney and I haven’t given you enough trouble over the years, I can sneak out and drink if you really want. I’m still underage in the Muggle world, you know.”

Her mum laughed loudly. “Absolutely not, you cheeky girl. I should probably be grateful that you two never put your minds together like that, I’d lose all authority.”

“What authority?” Lily quipped, and her mum swatted her with the tea towel.

“Shut it, you,” she joked. Her face grew serious again as she took the last of the plates from Lily. “Really though Lil, promise me that you’ll do your best to get along with Petunia until the wedding? You only get married once, and you know how much your sister loves Vernon, I don’t want anything to put a damper on her special day.”

Immediately Lily thought of several choice remarks about Vernon and Petunia, but seeing the look on her mother’s face she realised now really wasn’t the time to play comedian.

“Of course I’ll try mum, I don’t want to ruin Petunia’s wedding. I’ll be the best bridesmaid ever,” she said with as much sincerity as she could muster. Her mum gave her a tight squeeze.

“Thank you so much love, you were always the mature one. Don’t tell her I said that,” she whispered into Lily’s hair. Lily stepped back and mimed zipping her lips, smiling back at her mother.

“Now off to bed you, you may be an adult in your world but under this roof you’re still my daughter,” her mum ordered, swatting her once more with the tea towel.

Lily dodged out of the way quickly, grinning as she poured out her cup of tea. “Yes, ma’am,” she said. She headed back upstairs, her mum following closely behind after turning out the kitchen light.

Still smiling, Lily sat down her bed and took a sip of tea, feeling it warm her up. She regretted that she couldn’t have chats with her mum like that more often, given that she was away so much of the year. Letter writing was okay, but writing always felt so impersonal, so detached from real life. It could never compare to being home with her. She was thrilled to be a witch, but leaving behind her mum every year was as hard as it was at eleven.

But that wasn’t for another month, she reminded herself, clearing the sad thoughts from her brain with another sip of tea. She glanced over to Scarlett’s empty cage, wondering how long it would take for her to return. It was a strange reality of Hogwarts life, she mused, that you could live with people the majority of the year and yet have very little idea of where they actually came from.

Despite her earlier doubts, the tea did in fact tire her out, and within half an hour she was sound asleep.

***

As soon as she woke the next morning her eyes went straight to the window, but Scarlett wasn’t there tapping to get in. She sighed, resigning herself to another day of anxious anticipation. She started to get dressed for the day, trying to prepare what she was going to reply to Potter when Scarlett returned. Would he say yes, she wondered? It had been a year since the last time he asked her out, and Lily knew several girls had tried to go to Hogsmeade with him throughout 6th year. Not that she paid attention to gossip, of course. She wasn’t interested in who Potter was dating, unless it meant that she was without a partner on Saturday night.

She was just heading downstairs for some breakfast when she heard a hoot from the front door. Lily frowned. Why wouldn’t Scarlett just go to her window like always? She tried to continue on to the kitchen but there was another hoot, louder this time.

This was weird behaviour for any owl, and Lily’s was always the model of good behaviour. Maybe she was hurt? Lily rushed to the door, not wanting Scarlett to suffer. She unlocked the front door, and opened it.

Looking down for an injured owl, she saw nothing but a pair of feet in brand new trainers. Her eyes travelled up, and there he was, his hand already buried in his messy black hair. Lily’s jaw dropped.

“Potter?” she croaked.

James smiled in a way he clearly thought was charming.

“Now, is that any way to greet your fake boyfriend?”

***

Chap 3

Thanks for reading! Future chapters uploaded to AO3 here and FFN here :)

#marauders fic #harry potter marauders #marauders era #marauders fanfiction #marauders headcanon #harry potter fanfiction #harry potter #fanfiction #fanfic #jily #jily fandom #jily fanfiction #pro jily #jily fluff #jily fic #jily fic rec #fic rec #new chapter #writing #james and lily #james potter #lily potter #lily evans #remus lupin

[ghostlywritten]

Too Nice To Say Goodbye Pt. 2

A/N: Look, a bias wrecker.

For those, who are waiting on an update for ‘Uncertainty’: I’m having a tough time coming up with an interesting plot, because the third season royally sucked in my opinion. I’m gonna try, but it will take a while.

Words: 3,5k+

Part 1 

It took you a huge amount of self control to keep the tears at bay throughout the night. Haechan was fidgeting nervously every now and then next to you, his eyes constantly flickering over as if he was afraid you would blow up at any minute.

You almost rolled your eyes. You were not going to cry in front of anyone. You had never even cried in front of Mark despite all the time you’d shared together so far.

‘Speaking of’, you let your eyes wander to your ‘boyfriend’ or whatever he was right now, who was completely immersed in the show, his arm loosely hanging over Yeri’s back of the seat. 

‘They would look good together,’ you realised, noticing the admiring look Yeri would occasionally throw at him. You had known about her feelings right from the beginning. Not that she was mean to you or anything, she was just as nice as Mark. It was the quiet but passionate way she always looked at him when she thought no one was watching. 

You felt uncomfortably out of place. As if you were the villain standing in the way of their love. The best friends separated by a third person, because they hadn’t yet acknowledged or admitted their feelings to each other. It was so cliche, it was sickening you.

For the rest of the night you kept to yourself, nursing the one drink you had as you watched the others chat animatedly over mindless discussions. You wondered briefly if they had known all along what you had just concluded for yourself and felt your cheeks warm in embarrassment.

‘I can never show my face here again,’ you thought to yourself as you bid them goodnight after a few hours, the cold air refreshing as you stepped out with Mark in tow. You breathed in deeply, finding it easier now to keep your emotions in check since you got out of that stuffy room (and away from the lovesick eyes of Yeri).

“That was cool, right? Just us chilling, all relaxed and stuff,” Mark commented, sighing blissfully as he fell into step beside you. You had decided to walk the short way to Johnny’s flat earlier but you started to regret it now as it seemed to be a much longer route than you had in mind, not to mention the wind being freezing cold. 

“Mhm,” you hummed, stuffing your hands into the pockets of your sweater. Usually you would hold on Mark’s hands as they were always mysteriously warm but it was too awkward now. 

Everything was uncomfortably awkward with him now. 

Two weeks passed and you were retreating more and more into your shell, shying away from any sort of contact with the NCT gang. You couldn’t help the humiliation you felt, knowing how you were the unwelcome third wheel standing in the way of the best-friends-to-lovers relationship. They were probably all waiting for you to just be left behind and for the actual love to start blossoming between Mark and Yeri. 

But although it was quite easy for you to stay away from them and have all these bitter thoughts you just didn’t have it in you to break up with Mark. Your love for him was achingly real and it hadn’t wavered a single bit, despite the situation.

You still smiled when he did, you still laughed when he did, you still gave him a kiss on the cheek whenever you woke up first and you still longed for his touch, even if it was just a simple intertwining of your hands at night whilst he was fast asleep.

You never went as far as that anymore. Never initiated anything when he was fully conscious, not wanting to make him feel awkward. You had to cringe whenever you thought back on all the skinship you had done and how discomforting it must have been for him. 

‘When has he stopped finding comfort with me?’ you wondered sadly, trying to distract yourself with some studying. Keyword, “trying”. All you did was stare blankly at the screen of your laptop, rereading a line without taking in its contents as your eyes grew more and more tired with each passing second. 

A door opened and fell shut, shaking you awake from your mindless state. “I’m home,” Mark announced and you heard him stop his shuffling as if he was expecting an answer. 

You opened your mouth to shout back the usual “Welcome back, love” but the words died on the tip of your tongue and you just pressed your lips together, swallowing tightly. 

“Y/N, are you home?” Mark called out, walking further inside.

“I’m here,” you said quietly just as he passed by the kitchen, causing him to jerk in surprise. 

“Oh my Jesus, you scared me,” he breathed out, laughing as he held his hand to his heart. Your own thudded out of rhythm upon seeing his dimples. 

“Sorry,” you said with a wry smile before you looked back at your screen, pretending to read whatever you had put up. You actually didn’t have to study anymore since graduation came up in a month but it wasn’t like Mark knew about that.

“What are you up to?” he asked, ruffling his black hair as he took out a water bottle from the fridge, handing you one as well. 

“Just some post-studying,” you replied vaguely but he smiled anyways, patting your shoulder, “Yo, keep it up. You are going to slay,” he encouraged and you chuckled at his choice of wording. 

He had always been a promoter for hard work, cheering you on to keep going when you were close to giving up. You admired and simultaneously felt grateful for that trait as it helped you through the toughest exam periods. 

“Thank you, Mark,” you said softly, glancing at him lovingly but quickly averting your eyes, wondering if that had already been too much. Your shoulders slumped slightly. Were you really supposed to tiptoe around your boyfriend like that, thinking over which move was the least loving in order not to make him uncomfortable? 

No, you were not. And yet, you couldn’t let him go. Even if it wasn’t fair for the both of you. 

You failed to notice his face fall slightly. “Hey, is everything alright?” he asked, placing a hand on your shoulder. You flinched slightly in surprise, causing him to raise his eyebrows. Was that probably the first touch he had initiated in a long time? 

“..Um, yeah I’m good,” you said, quickly changing the subject, “And you? How was your day?”

“Oh, it was great. Donghyuck did such a funny move today at practice...,” Mark started off, sitting down on the seat next to you as he rambled about his day as usual. You smiled slightly at his excitement, closing your laptop and resting your head on your hand as you turned to listen to him, using times like these to stare unabashedly at him and engrave his every feature in your mind for the future. 

“...and yeah, it was just dope. You should have seen it, Y/N,” he ended, wiping his eye after another laughing fit he had.

“I wish I had,” you commented lightly, not really meaning it. You were perfectly fine with not seeing them again as bad as it sounded. 

Mark’s smile faded slightly and he cleared his throat, “Actually, the guys have been wondering where you are. They haven’t seen you in a while...,” he trailed off and your heart skipped a beat. They asked about you? Why? Or was he just using it as an excuse because he was wondering himself? “I never noticed before but you have not been around for movie nights and practices in weeks...” Your heart deflated into a pout at his words and you broke the eye contact, looking down at the counter instead. 

“Yeah, I’ve just been busy with...studying and stuff.”

“But...aren’t you graduating in a month?” he asked with furrowed eyebrows. 

“You...know about that?”

“Yeah, Donghyuckie told me.” It just seemed that he was going to keep lifting and dropping your heart tonight. How did Donghyuck remember anyways? You had only briefly mentioned it to the whole group. 

“Yeah, but I might be called into an oral exam if they can’t decide on my grade,” you lied lamely, sighing inwardly when he nodded in acceptance.

The frown didn’t leave his face though and he scratched the back of his head. “Why didn’t you tell me you were going to finish college soon anyways?” 

You shrugged, “It’s not a big deal.” 

“Not a big- Y/N, you are graduating!” he exclaimed, “How is that not a big deal?!” You stayed quiet. “Were you just going to accept your scroll without me cheering you on from the crowd?” A smile crept up on your lips, your heart warming at his sweet gesture. Mark was just the nicest guy you had and would ever meet. You could tell he still cared for you even if he didn’t love you anymore. And maybe that was why you held onto him. 

Your ‘boyfriend’ grinned back and you couldn’t resist reaching out to him. He stood up, letting you wrap your arms around him and rest your head against his chest. “Just tell me the date and time and I’ll be there,” he muttered into your hair and you nodded wordlessly, listening to the steady beat of his heart. 

A month passed and you felt like time had almost reverted back to when you both were deeply in love with each other. Mark had seemed to realise how you were drifting away and even though he didn’t understand why, he never forced you to tell him. Instead he was determined to coax you out of your shell, asking you to go out with him to a new restaurant, playing video games until late at night and refusing to let go of you in the morning. 

You tried to guard your heart but couldn’t help but enjoy his attention again and soon you were falling back into his arms, giving in to the urge to clutch onto him like a koala. Especially at the point where you started kissing again. It was the fifth consecutive night you had spent playing Mario Kart together and you were as usual failing to beat him in any round, causing him to whoop after every win. 

“Ahh, I guess it should get boring to win against you all the time,” Mark teased as he wrapped his arms around  you when you eventually refused to play another round, “...but nah! It’s always fun!” he cackled at your sour expression and you had a hard time fighting the smile from your face. 

“Yeah, yeah I got it. You’re the best,” you uttered, playfully rolling your eyes and he squeezed you closer, suddenly causing his face to be inches from yours. Your expression turned somber as you traced all his features with your eyes, poking his dimple. It deepened when he smiled wider, his own dark brown eyes flickering between yours and - your heart fluttered - your lips. 

You stilled when he drew closer, his breath hitting your face, watching his eyes flutter close as he brushed his lips against yours before fully placing them on. You stopped breathing, your eyes closing on their own, relishing in the familiar yet foreign feeling of his mouth on yours, his hand on your jaw, his fingers tracing your skin and you couldn’t stop yourself from drawing him closer by his shirt, deepening the first kiss you had shared in a long time. He let out a low groan, his chest vibrating against your fingers and to your delight you could feel his heart race as you ran your tongue over his lip a-

A phone ringing interrupted your sudden makeout session. You broke your kiss, breathing heavily as you looked up into Mark’s eyes. He looked dazed with his cheeks flushed and hair messed up and you had never found him more beautiful than now. “I think it’s yours,” you huffed and it took him a second to focus before nodded absently, grumbling under his breath. He took his phone out of his pocket, squinting at the screen light. 

“It’s Donghyuck inviting us over to Johnny’s flat,” he said chuckling, “He’s mad that we’ve been neglecting the movie nights.” You smiled, slowly regaining a normal breathing pattern as you straightened yourself up. “Shall we go tonight? They haven’t started, yet.” Freezing, you thought back on Donghyuck’s comments about your relationship and how the embarrassment you felt the last time you were there. 

“Uhh, I’m not really in the mood for a movie,” you excused yourself quickly, faking a yawn, “I’m pretty tired actually. But you go ahead and have fun!” Mark frowned slightly, glancing down at his phone before putting it away, “No, it’s okay. I will go to bed with you.”

You raised your eyebrows in surprise but decided not to comment on it. He trotted after you towards your bedroom and you wondered whether you would continue where you had stopped when you got interrupted, your cheeks flushing slightly. No one could blame you, it had been a while since he had kissed you. 

“You know, you haven’t been hanging out with me and the guys for a while now...,” Mark approached the subject again as you both slipped into bed. 

“Oh really?” you squeaked, cursing yourself for your high pitched voice, “I didn’t notice.”

“Yeah, it’s just they have been wondering what’s up. I told them it’s nothing because...there’s nothing, right?” he asked uncertainly, facing you as you laid on your back. You swallowed down a cough when you found your throat had turned dry.

“No, of course not. I’ve just been busy with graduation coming up and stuff.” Mark nodded in agreement, seeming pleased with the excuse and you bid him goodnight before automatically turning to your side, used to facing away from him now. 

But tonight he shuffled over, wrapping his arm around you as he snuggled into your back. He planted a kiss on your head and your heart melted when he intertwined your fingers together in front of you. 

“I’ll make sure the guys and I attend your big day!” he said, his voice already sleepy and yet he managed to make your heart burst with affection. It meant a lot to you since everyone else had rejected coming - mainly your parents and close friends - due to busy schedules and such. 

You sighed, feeling happy to know you had someone to look at after you accepted your scroll.

-

But you wouldn’t have someone to look at. As you stood waiting in line in front of the stage, waiting for your turn, you wouldn’t have someone to look at. You would constantly glance down at your phone, waiting for a message to explain why he and his friends weren’t there yet.

You would disheartingly go up the stage, shake the principal’s hand with a tight smile, take a picture whilst your eyes would flicker over the crowd in vain until you had to leave the stage with a hanging head. 

‘Something important must have come up,’ you thought, worry clenching your chest, ‘What if he got into an accident?’ You immediately reached for your phone and dialled Mark’s number, growing nervous with each dial tone when he picked up. 

“Hey Y/N, I’m so sorry!” Mark picked up, frantically apologising and you sighed in relief at hearing his voice. 

“It’s okay, Mark,” you said, “Are you alright? You didn’t get into an accident, did you?”

“No no, it’s all good, I’ve just held up at practice.” You nodded. That would have been your second guess. 

“Did you lose track of time again?” you asked good-naturedly, simultaneously hating and feeling fond of this trait.

“Yeah, kind of. It was an emergency,” You nodded again even though he couldn’t see you, “Yeri was crying because she couldn’t keep up with the others. Seriously, I’ve never seen her break down like this before...,” his voice faded into the background for a second as you took in his words, “It took me and the others a full hour to calm her down. Man, she must have been holding it all in for so long...”

“I see,” you whispered, closing your eyes tightly and clenching your hand into a fist. 

“I’m really, really sorry, love, for missing your graduation. I know it’s really important!” Mark apologised again and you distantly heard a chorus of ‘sorry’s from the guys, including Yeri, “I can make it to the after party-”

“No, don’t bother, really,” you said, not able to hide the bitterness in your voice. Someone called your name, asking if you needed a ride. You turned over to one of your fellow students, who had been your roommates before you moved in with Mark, and gave her thumbs up.

“Y/N?” Mark asked, a little apprehension colouring his tone. 

“I’m not going to stay for long anyway. And you should you stay with Yeri-ah,” you muttered, dying to hang up. 

“But-”

“See you,” you ended the call, taking in a few deep breathes to calm yourself. ‘This is your day, Y/N. Don’t let anyone ruin your day,’ you thought sadly. 

-

The party was in full swing, people lingering around in circles with their respective families and friends, chatting up storms with glasses of champagne or wine or whatever they wanted. 

To say you felt like the odd one out was an understatement, being the only one without a single acquaintance around, you were forced to stand with your former roommate’s people, akwardly making conversation with them. 

“Are you alright?” your colleague would whisper-ask you every minute and you would always nod until you couldn’t even lie anymore with the tears brimming in your eyes. 

After an hour you decided to call it a day, realising that you wouldn’t be able to save any joy you had with graduating. Sighing deeply, you watched the puff of air as you walked your way home, finding peace in the silent night with the occasional refreshing breeze. You suddenly felt so tired, tired of pretending, tired of holding on when it was so pointless. 

You knew you had to eventually set Mark free and the time had come now. ‘I will ask him to come over tomorrow,’ you decided, figuring he would stay at Yeri’s or wherever she was to keep her company. To your surprise, you saw him standing in front of your apartment door, an adorably confused expression on his face as he searched his pockets. Knowing him, he had forgotten to take them in the first place. 

His features brightened up when he noticed you walk over, “Y/N, thank Jesus you are here! I probably lost my keys again.” 

“Hey Mark,” you greeted him quietly, slipping your keys into the lock and opening the door without stepping in. 

“Hey jagi...,” he called you gently, noticing your distress and holding onto your arm, “I’m really sorry I missed your day. You know, I wanted to be there so bad..”

“And I actually believe you, Mark,” you said, turning to see him smile his beautiful dimpled smile, “But I don’t think it’s enough...anymore.” You watched his face slowly drop as he registered the words. 

“Wait- what do you mean?” he asked, stepping closer but stopping when you moved back, crossing the threshold to what was once the home for both of you.

“I mean, we should end it here.”

Mark’s eyes widened, shock crossing his features. “W-what? Why??” 

You held up a hand so he wouldn’t get in, closing the door. “Please, just stay over at someone’s else for tonight. I will have my things moved out by tomorrow.”

“Moved out where- Y/N!” he pressed his hand against the wood, preventing any form of barrier between you. By now, you had a hard time keeping your tears in and you just wanted to be out of his sight before he could see them, “ Where the hell are you going? Why are you talking like this?”

“Because you don’t love me anymore, Mark!” you finally shouted out the words that you had kept in your heart, breaking it in the process of finally stepping out of the constant denial. “You don’t love me anymore,” you sighed, this time quieter and more defeated, “I can tell, everyone can tell...and I know you are too nice to break up with me so I’m doing it for you.”

“But I do love you...,” he uttered, his mind racing to find out what made you think that he didn’t in the first place, but the hesitation was clear in his voice. 

You shook your head with a sad smile, “You don’t. So please...just go.” Your voice cracked at the end, freezing him into place and you took the moment to close the door on him, and you relationship. 

A few months later you would see a heavily disguised boy holding onto a hand of a petite, equally disguised girl walking down the streets, into the cafe you would usually find yourself in and you would immediately realise just who they were, causing you to turn your back on your’s and Mark’s favourite place to go on dates.

End...I guess.

Help me Get Coffee Support?

#nct angst #mark angst #marklee angst #nct mark angst #mark #mark lee #nct imagine #nct oneshot #mark oneshot #mark imagine #nct127 #superm #nctu #nct

[glare0322]

sooo i was rereading overlord protocol (cause of quarantine) and completely forgot about shelby’s nightmares of wing dying and how alone she felt. i thought, hey what if those nightmares never stopped and one thing led to another ending in this short story being created...

✇ ✇ ✇

length; 1,760 words

pairing; wingelby (but shing or unconventional tactics is the better ship name don’t at me)

✇ ✇ ✇

The darkness dripped into an all-too familiar scene. Slow crashing of the waves against their wooden boat, the night sky painted with deep blues swirled into blacks dotted with glimmering stars, the overbearing salty smell of the ocean, the nightlife making their unique sounds all around them. His dark eyes catching the light of the sky, a peaceful smile that only grew whenever he caught yet another glimpse towards her, the white amulet standing out against the otherwise dusky scene.

Shelby loathed it all. The terror had driven her to despise this picture perfect setting.

A sigh escaped into the air before the most unpleasant moment unrolled. On cue, he reached for her hand gazing out onto the skyline as he did. Shelby gripped onto his hand tight, trying to conjure all the strength she had to maintain a solid grip he could not break from. Maybe just maybe if she held on, the story would play out differently. Tears were already finding their way onto her redden checks as her cloudy sapphire eyes looked up to him.

He was so content which made her already torn state more apparent. She should be grinning just like him, but that was impossible under these circumstances. "My mother used to tell me stories of the sea," he started as Shelby silently mumbled the familiar sentence. "Simple Chinese folklore you could find in any children's book, yet the way she told them never ceased to bring the characters out of the pages and into life."

Her heart ached as she realized the final outcome would still be inevitable even if she had a grip of steel. The evidence was piling up by the second: past experiences never changing, the destination, and worse of all were his words. Shelby could site his calm-toned sentences from having heard them rattle in her head for days on end before. So when the final sentence was delivered, her blood ran cold. "She would have loved to meet you," she said in sync with him, matching every detail of his sentence expect for the tone. While he had spoke a sentence laced with love only allowing a small pane of sadness to shine through, her rendition was much more somber.

The warmth that came from his hands was gone almost as quick as she dove into the deep ocean to follow him. She kicked as hard as her legs willed her, making sure to never let him out of her sight. Her lungs burned with the need for air along with her muscles now screaming from exhaustion. She could not give up, not yet. However, no matter how much she willed, he was disappearing into the shadows far too quickly for her to catch up with him.

"Wing!" she screamed allowing the water to entrap her lungs. Shelby reached for his hand and felt a small snap as he descended far beyond her reach, never to be seen again. She did not have any air and the water now clogging her airway only intensified the pain. Pushing through the overwhelming discomfort, Shelby made her way back to the surface and soon found herself back where their boat should have been.

As usual, the wooden boat was long gone and unable to comfort her crushing loneliness. This time, the loneliness came with an even more frightening moment. Sitting in her tightly closed hand was Wing's amulet from his mother. The white comma shaped charm stood out like a sore thumb against the pitch black water.

Why did she have it?

Shelby never got a hold of it. The scene usually went that he disappeared leaving her completely isolated, but this time differed. The amulet that sat in her hand spoke two messages to her. The first comforted her. Shelby's frantic mind jumbled together that maybe it was a sign of hope; that he would always be there for her. Yet as the thoughts arranged themselves the true meaning presented itself clear as day.

Wing would be gone and no matter what she did, it would stay that way. There was no saving him.

The tears returned as she slowly drifted with nothing but a reminder of her failure. Soon they turned from silent tears to full sobs as the loneliness set in like usual, only this time it was amplified by the amulet.

✇ ✇ ✇

Shelby woke with a start, immediately sitting up in her bed. Her irregular, quick breaths filled the room, over powering her roommates soft snores from across. Just as they were present in her nightmare, the hot, heavy tears were now tumbling onto her gray bed comforter making their arrival onto it present with small temporary stains. She swallowed hard as she tried to slow her rapid breathing, yet was unsuccessful.

'Just as I was in saving Wing' she thought trying to wipe away the tears before they overtook her bed sheets. Her eyes, still lingering with tears, drifted over to her Blackbox and slowly she reached for it. The time read 5:47 A.M. and she slumped into bed. There was way she was going back to sleep, so she was left there to wallow in her feelings of abandonment and failure. Shelby hastily thought of something to escape her feelings for a little longer. She knew that they were allowed to leave their rooms in a couple of minutes and Shelby already had a destination in mind.

As she got out of her bed, Laura's almost quite snores once again reigned over the room. Shelby gazed over to her roommate and a comforting smile found its way to her face.

A textbook for Advanced Villainy Studies sat open in her lap with one of her freckled hands rested on the pages along with her Blackbox, now with a black screen, sitting right beside it. As she made her way towards their bathroom, Shelby thought of Laura and Otto's most recent project: a secret channel just for them to talk on. It would take a genius to accomplish it, so it was a good thing there were two geniuses working on it. Both of them knew if they were successful, there was no possibility to keep it hidden for longer than a week.

The painful memories of her nightmares began to catch up with her as she quickly turned into the bathroom with her uniform in hand. When Shelby caught a glimpse at herself in their mirror, her gloomy feelings only worsened. Her messy blonde hair now being accompanied with puffy eyes and streaks along her cheeks where her tears were still carefully gliding down.

As if it were any morning, she got her uniform on and brushed out her bed head. Leaving the bathroom, she grabbed her Blackbox and headed straight for the door.

The sound of water from the waterfall in the accommodation area immediately sent her back to her previous terrors in the ocean. The strong emotions haunted her as she stepped out into the hallway to take her to the huge cavern that was accommodation area seven.

✇ ✇ ✇

The LED light in the room strained her eyes, just a little as Shelby stepped into the room full of equipment for training. Her hand traced the seem of the punching bag before she got into a ready stance. Just like she had done many times over, her fist collided with the bag swinging it back just a little.

The loneliness, sadness, and fear had finally reached her and there was no possible way of outrunning them now. She concentrated on her blows to the bag as if it was her nightmares that she was beating instead of the punching bag.

She wanted them to stop pestering her. The previous emotions swirled into anger as her punches became faster with more power behind them.

The peaceful look he gave her as he told his story and eventually his final line.

Another strong hit to the bag.

The chilling water engulfing the both of them and soon taking him away from her reach.

One more powerful swing at the equipment.

And that stupid amulet taunting her failure.

As she went to deliver another hit, a hand cut in front her causing her to punch that person's palm rather than her target. Her breath hitched as she prepared to tell off the person for getting in her way. However, once her fiery blue eyes met his she recoiled back a little.

"Your poor technique caused these," Wing told her mentioning her bloody, scraped knuckles that she had not even noticed. Shelby has been so focused on her nightmare that she had neglected the pain now coursing through her hands.

"Guess Ms. Leon is not going to be happy her best student is suffering an injury that will effect her results on the test today," she joked trying to distract him from her distant state, or her tear stained cheeks.

Although a small smile found its way to his face, his eyes still were serious and full of concern. "Shelby, what happened?"

How could she answer? There would be no way to convey her hidden pain and concerns of her terrifying nightmares to him. The overbearing loneliness she felt after he disappeared or fears now surrounding that pendent hanging from his neck. Her nightmares have now ruined something she has to see every day; it's mockery from her night terrors carrying over to real life.

"Well..." she began as her eyes trailed down to the floor. While looking at the floor she noticed him still holding her scraped hand with the same determination she had in her nightmares. Along with this, she became aware of the warmth from his hands and remembered how in the boat it disappeared right before he left. Anticipation built up as she waited for it to leave, just like it always did.

But it didn't. He was still there, patiently waiting her response to his question.

She felt that loneliness lift off her shoulders along with all the worries she had been escaping from all night and this morning. Shelby felt able to breathe normally, felt her senses return, and more importantly felt trust in the fact Wing was going nowhere.

Well until some psychopathic villain with a most likely well deserved grudge against the school came again.

"Come on big guy, I'll tell you as you bandage up my knuckles." Shelby let a smile along with a giddy feeling overtake her as she held onto his hand and led them out of the room.

#hive #h.i.v.e. #wing fanchu #shelby trinity #shing #unconventional tactics #oopsie its a lil angsty #they could stab me and i’d say thanks #wingelby #winglby