#i have to be busy with something else so my brain can be stimulated enough to follow along with what they're saying

[thebeautifulfantastic]

i really need to find a new hobby that doesn't involve writing or speaking or singing or reading so that i can actually listen to all the podcast episodes i have saved on spotify so i'm considering going back to drawing... but when the fuck will i ever have time for that?

#i SO busy it's insane #but okay. at my part time job i listen to podcasts a lot #i'll just have one earbud in when there are no customers around and i'm just cleaning and i get my podcast fix that way #or if i'm organizing stuff at home or cooking #i would just like to have a consistent FUN thing that i can do where i listen to podcasts #because i'm a visual learner and i have adhd so if i just sit down and do nothing while listening to podcasts #i will NOT be able to pay attention #i have to be busy with something else so my brain can be stimulated enough to follow along with what they're saying #and i have so many good podcasts saved on spotify #ahh well i'll figure it out eventually #i'm not a GREAT artist but i was pretty good at certain things (namely horses) #and it would be cool to be able to draw again and maybe make some fanart #someday i swear i will get back to it because those were good time #belle speaks #from the vault (aka the drafts folder)

[the-s1lly-corner]

I was rewatching the Mulan films to get that childhood nostalgia, and I remembered how much I love Mushu...

So I thought "what would the cast of TADC x reader be like, who is practically a copy of Mushu's personality", I imagine that in appearance he would be a Chinese dragon humanoid but with his personality

TADC cast x mushu type! reader !

im finally back on my computer, woohoo! ill probably answer a few requests, since i wanna draw stuff today </3 i dont really like leaving my wips unfinished for more than a few days TToTT side note i gotta rewatch mulan, used to be one of my favorite movies as a kid (though i barely watched movies back then so uh uh its not like there were many contenders </3) relying on the good ol character wiki to help me through this because its been so long since ive watched the movie

CAINE:

i think caine would actually really enjoy you, a lot! in a weird way caine gives off similar energy, with the confidence and such you know? so you two probably bounce right off each other and build one another up... though sometimes this leads to more insane IHAs because you insist to caine that youre more capable than you actually are... as mean as that sounds... the only reason that things dont get too too chaotic is because caine, in my opinion, does hold some significant level of care for the circus members (at least as it stands for the pilot)

like would he die for them? probably not.. but he cares enough to keep the circus (mostly) safe and bothers with keeping them mentally stimulated and entertained; he doesnt even watch the IHAs himself so its likely that its not for his own entertainment

ponders

im getting off topic, though, point is i think you two would be friends !

POMNI:

honestly i struggle a lot with writing pomni, but i think the two of you would be friendly with one another ! i think she might be a little taken aback by your confidence, but hey, its not like its to anyones detriment, right? well... IHAs can get interesting, with you either insisting to run in, leroy jenkins style, into the conflict; or trying to push someone else to do (oftentimes ragatha, who i feel would be the most likely to do the most in IHAs if theres nothing pulling her away from it (cough cough checking on kaufmo cough cough)

honestly my brains a little fuzzy trying to remember mulan, but i feel like you and pomni would have a similar dynamic to mulan and mushu as well

JAX:

i think jax would try to push you more than he does the others since oftentimes your reactions are more... out there, youre so desperate to prove yourself as this big strong individual that you kind of make an ass out of yourself. and jax revels in your humiliation everytime someone manages to humble you.. in terms of the other stuff, i think he would tease and make fun of any abilities you have.. assuming you also have (some) fire abilities like mushu, jax would just call you names like "matchstick" and "lighter boy", making fun of your weak fire powers

RAGATHA:

as mentioned in pomnis part, you and ragatha have... an interesting dynamic... but i can also see you two having a similar dynamic to mushu and cri-kee . with you being bold and ragatha keeping you grounded. often you two end up together during IHAs with either ragatha seeking you out or someone pushing you to her

not much to be said, i think ! very similar dynamic, ragatha keeps you in check, though i think she would occasionally scold you if you did something particularly reckless

KINGER:

ooo this ones a hard one, but i think it would be similar to my personal take on what his and caines dynamic would be but with you as a fellow circus member rather than the ring master... has respect for you (though i think kinger would have respect for just about everyone who has come and gone to the circus, he doesnt strike me as the type to just diss others unless theres a reason he doesnt like the person... and even then he would mind his own business, i think) which... honestly, i can see this either making your ego more intense or actually mean something to have someone actually respect you.. ponders... character degradation(?) or character growth.. both are fun routes, i think! ill leave this one up to you...

slides my favorite kinger thing

you guys tell each other stories about your adventures, both of you hyping them up way more than they need to be

ZOOBLE:

writing zoobles part first because i think that they may be the hardest, but in the kindest way possible i dont think they would be able to stand your personality... maybe youre a little loud and out there, or maybe they just dont like your humor or often times self centered nature... i think they would tolerate you just enough to get through IHA but forming a friendship with zooble is going to be tough... though, they do find it amusing when you and jax butt heads

GANGLE:

very similar to pomnis part, i think... but like, gangle is shy whereas pomni is nervous so things are a little different... i think gangle would just along with most stuff you decide to do, that you rope her into, because she doesnt have a backbone to say no or suggest something else.. well she doesnt have bones in general but... you know? honestly she kind of envies you in a weird way, she wishes she had the confidence you have so sometimes she probably approaches you for advice.. how this ends up is up to you !

#tadc x reader #the amazing digital circus x reader #caine x reader #pomni x reader #ragatha x reader #jax x reader #kinger x reader #zooble x reader #gangle x reader

[sumeruin]

♫♪: minor writing smut, dni if uncomfortable!!

♫♪: pairing: dilf! kazuha x reader

♫♪: warnings: written by a minor, semi-public sex, brief mentions of overstimulation and oral (no areas specified), aftercare, mentions of scars, i think that’s it, but if i missed anything please let me know!!

♫♪: a/n: mindless rambles about dilf kazuha from 3am this morning <3 also, new header!! i haven’t had time to actually change up my theme yet, so this is the best are gonna get for now <3

♫♪: minor writing smut, dni if uncomfortable!!

ok… so dilf kazuha… (modern au obvi) maybe he bulks up a little more as he ages, gets more muscular, gathers some more scars all over his body. he still keeps his hair long, though now he wears it down most of the time, not having the time in the mornings to put it up between his kid and his job. sometimes he’ll put it in a little bun, when he’s cooking or doing something where his hair would get in the way, and it suits him so well.

i’m thinking he has a little bit of peach fuzz too. not a full beard or anything, but just enough for you to feel it when he kisses your thighs before going down on you, the hair adding that small, extra bit of stimulation to make you cum so much faster on his tongue.

he usually wears a casual outfit, just a thin, white t shirt, some grey sweatpants, and a pair of tennis shoes. between his job as a bodyguard and his kid, he doesn’t really have the energy for much else. except, of course, for those rare special occasions where he dresses up, usually for his date nights with you, and he wears a black and red suit. a red button up, with a black suit jacket, tie, and dres pants. these are also the occasions where he’ll put his hair up and wear some nice cologne (unrelated but i have a whole cologne/perfume rant about genshin characters in my head if anyone is interested) only because he knows you love it so much.

he takes you out to a nice restaurant, both of you practically clinging to each other as you sit at the table, and he always, without fail, takes you back to his house and absolutely ruins you afterwards, the perfect way to relieve a little stress after a busy week. and it’s not like you’re complaining, either. kazuha is very much a giver, making sure you cum at the very least twice before he even thinks about actually fucking you, leaving you more than satisfied and overstimulated, enough to hold you over until the next week.

sometimes, he’ll change it up, still very much a wanderer at heart, and take you somewhere calmer. maybe you’ll go stargazing one night, and he’ll get to fuck you under the endless, beautiful sky, pointing out all the constellations he can see while he’s balls deep inside of you, waxing poetic about how gorgeous you look under the moonlight while you cum for him. or you’ll go see the maple trees at night, and he’ll press you up against the bark while he slides your clothes off, taking care not to scratch or rip any of the fabric. it’s not like you’d particularly care if he did, you’re always too fucked out and tired from cumming your brains out to be able to think about your clothes, or anything besides him, really.

he has the best aftercare, too, even if he does sometimes have to wait a little bit until you can get back home. he always runs you a warm bath, and fills it with sweet smelling oils and flower petals reserved just for you, massaging some lightly scented lotion and body oils into your sore joints afterwards and holding you close to him strong, scarred body as you fall asleep. and he’s a great cook, always making you the best breakfasts after a night full of railing you into the mattress. his go to is french toast, but he’ll make you anything you want as long as you just ask him <33

#⋆⁺₊⋆ ☾ angel’s creations ⋆⁺₊⋆ ☁︎ #genshin x reader #genshin smut #genshin kazuha smut #genshin impact #genshin impact smut #genshin impact x reader #genshin impact x reader smut #kaedehara kazuha x you #kaedehara kazuha smut #kazuha smut #kaedehara kazuha #genshin kazuha #kazuha x reader #kaedehara kazuha x reader #kazuha #kazuha x reader smut

[ferretwhomst]

NICE my post got two notes anyways here's my thoughts on the pines fam handling over/understimulation as a neurodivergent and mentally ill family in my own personal canon

putting this under a readmore again because uhhh as always with my headcanons there's a lot and it'll probably be annoying to scroll thru over and over

if anyone else has any thoughts about this feel free 2 add onto this post <3 <3 <3 would love to hear it!!!!! ^_^

starting off with mabel, obviously she CRAVES stimulation so so badly and is constantly looking for something new to do, to the point where her default state is Slightly Overstimulated. i figure she also struggles with emotional dysregulation (even worse because mabel is literally just a kid and isnt equipped to handle heightened emotions with grace just yet sdfjjds) and she absolutely canNOT be understimulated or else she will explode the ENTIRE state of oregon. however a couple too many unpleasant sounds or textures or tastes at once and her entire day is ruined- well, it's not really, but it sure feels like it at the time. she starts angry crying and hitting things and only really calms down when she is completely separated from whatever was upsetting her or vice versa (her threshold for the amount of overstimulation she can handle before snapping probably lowers Significantly post-weirdmageddon), having waddles with her usually cheers her up a lot quicker though<3

ford is actually similar to her in a few aspects here, he too is running as far away from understimulation as possible, always sitting in his room tinkering with some new invention or running around catching some new creature to occupy himself. (he wasn't always like this! as a kid, between him and stan he was definitely and obviously the more docile one. but as an adult he feels the need to seek stimulation moreso because he needs to distract himself from his constant stream of often unpleasant thoughts) this has the unpleasant side effect of isolating himself from the people around him, but it's not intentional, it's just that busying himself with projects and studying the supernatural is his Default Solution to having nothing to do. it's comfortable for him. he also has the Thing where if he isn't explicitly invited to join someone, he doesn't feel comfortable doing so, even if he really wants to.

dipper and stan are completely different from mabel and ford in that they just. nobody ever told them that understimulation is not the default state of existing for everyone else??? so they just??? Put up with it regularly???? dipper stims frequently without realizing to combat this- clicking/chewing on pens over and over and pacing his room for example, but more often than not it isn't Quite Enough and he doesn't know Why. this is also why dipper's anxiety is So bad- sitting around without making an effort to distract himself from his many thoughts will often get him catastrophizing within minutes (him and ford probably bond over having Too Much Thought Head Full). in fact, if he didn't have mabel around to remind him to have fun and use his time wisely instead of getting stuck inside his own head for hours on end he would probably be a very different and much less emotionally stable person than he is in the show jsdjfjsda

stan doesn't stim very much except when he's genuinely scared or upset, in which case he is cracking his knuckles, gripping onto the closest fabric so hard it almost tears, pulling off his cuticles, picking at scabs etc etc (you can imagine how much he fucked up his skin in the days following both instances of him losing ford). he probably had very different habits when he was a kid though- because come on. stan was totally the poster child for audhd, constantly running around and being loud to satisfy his lil brain. however within a few years certain nd behaviors stop being "cute" to others and instead start attracting a shit ton of ridicule so now his only stims are ones which are inconspicuous and could be passed off as stress habits instead of being a clear sign of neurodivergence- plus he probably ended up developing shittier coping mechanisms while running around for 10 years after getting kicked out. but it's not like he can smoke or drink all the time with the kids (wendy and soos included) around though so his options are kinda limited

#sorry if this is inaccurate to anyone elses personal brain canon #this is just.... major projecting on my part LMFOAOO #ask to tag #ferret rambles #gravity falls #nd stuff #mabel pines #ford pines #dipper pines #stan pines #tw substance abuse #it's only briefly mentioned but jic

[fortheloveofwonderland]

🎵 But if you close your eyes, does it almost feel like nothing changed at all? And if you close your eyes, does it almost feel like you’ve been here before? - Pompeii by Bastille

Hi can i request and spencer reader for scarlets concert please

# milestone celebrations

Hello lovely Anon! Kind of a rewrite of 15.04 Saturday I guess. Artistic liberties were taken in that the Jeid confession never happened (like we all wish it hadn’t). Also the way Spencer talks about Pompeii is actually how the lead singer of Bastille described the meaning of the song in an interview.

I am still taking song lyric requests for my milestone celebration 🎵

Pompeii

Gif does not depict the appearance of the reader.

Spencer Reid x Fem! Reader

Summary - Spencer Reid is stuck in a rut, bored by his mundane life. But one conversation with a stranger prompts his whole life to change. And he knows he’ll never be bored again.

CW - slightly miserable Spencer, therapists, a lot of talk of Mount Vesuvius eruption and death, Spencer and his uncomfortable info dumps, self depreciating Spencer, one swear, mostly silliness and cute dog interactions.

WC - 4.3k

Spencer Reid was, for a lack of a better word, bored. Unfortunately for him, given his incredibly high IQ and his brain's need for constant stimulation, it was easy for him to feel this way. 

For a long time now he’d felt like he was living a Groundhog Day. His life became a series of tedious events that seemed to recur over and over again in the exact same way. 

His days started with coffee and the newspaper, whether he was at home or away on a case. He showered, towel dried his errant hair and dressed in some version of the same outfit everyday. 

Then he went to work, taking the metro at the same time everyday he was in DC or jumping into one of the SUV’s, always in the back seat, if they were away. 

The cases always seemed much the same as each other these days. People were being murdered, it was their jobs to stop the unsub. 

Time and time again Spencer found himself in front of a map working the geographic profile or he was utilised if there was a lot of literature as he was the only one who could get through it fast enough. 

He spoke to Garica over the phone, sometimes watched interrogations through the two-way glass, rarely conducted them. And when they had a suspect, he got on his Kevlar and piled into the SUV with the rest of the team. 

Whether they stopped the unsub before it was too late or not meant very little to him these days. 

And then he’d crawl into bed, sometimes his own, sometimes a random hotel bed in whatever town the team found themselves in. It didn’t much matter, they were all equally as lonely. 

And Spencer was just bored of it all. 

When he closed his eyes, it almost felt as if nothing had changed at all; like he’d been here before. The monotony of his days was getting him down. His impressive brain wasn’t being used to its full capacity and he felt it withering away inside of his skull. 

He didn’t feel challenged in any aspect of his life. His job had grown stale and maybe if he had something else to keep his mind occupied it might be ok. But climbing into an empty bed was by far the most soul destroying part of this perpetual deja vu loop he’d ended up in. 

How was he supposed to be optimistic when life kept giving him reasons not to be? 

Along with the boredom, Spencer started spiralling into a vicious pit of misery. It’s not that he was necessarily depressed, but he certainly wasn’t happy. 

He became snappy with the people he called his friends. He was easily irritable, quick to anger. Everyone had noticed. It didn't take a profiler to see Spencer wasn’t himself. 

But much like they always did, they buried their heads in the sand, busy enough with their own lives so they didn’t have time to worry about the youngest member of their team. It was a pattern he’d grown used to, another mundane facet of Spencer’s life. They cared, he knew that, but maybe they didn’t care enough. 

His days off were always the same too. 

He spent the mornings with coffee and a newspaper, showered and dressed before leaving his apartment. The home he’d once loved, his fortress of solitude, had grown so impossibly lonely that he couldn’t bear to spend more time there than he had to. 

Those four walls in which he’d lived for close to two decades now seemed hell bent on provoking him, reminding him how isolated he’d become. 

So he went out, to coffee shops, bookstores and museums; always in that order. He hated the rut he’d found himself in but he couldn’t for the life of him snap himself out of it. As much as he hated it, repetition was something he was good at. 

But something had to change. He had to find a way to banish the grey clouds that rolled over the hills, shrouding him in a constant darkness. 

And that was how Spencer Reid ended up on his day office in a therapist's office. 

His first three sessions went exactly the same, a constant theme in his life. His therapist would ask him what brought him here and what he hoped to achieve; in response Spencer would pretty much clam up instantly. 

In their fourth session, things played out a little differently. 

Doctor Santiago didn’t have her notebook on her lap when he entered her office like she had the other three times. Her hands were laced in her lap, her glasses pushed up on top of her head. Her expression was less amicable than usual. 

“Spencer,” she spoke before he’d even gotten comfortable. “I don’t mean to sound callous, but is it really worth wasting your money and what precious free time you have, coming here when you aren’t going to talk about why you’re here?” 

He looked at his shoes, one of which was tapping against the carpet, then he looked at his hands. He didn’t look back at Doctor Santiago when he spoke. 

“I’ve been reading a lot about Mount Versuvius and Pompeii.” He drummed his fingers against his thigh in time with his foots rhythmic tapping, 

“Ok…” Doctor Santiago frowned a little but hoped if she didn’t say too much so he would continue. 

“All those people who were just going about their days, lost in their own vices and then boom, it’s all over just like that. Posed forever in time as the dust settles around them. Do you know that approximately sixteen thousand people died in Pompeii?” He glanced up at her, his own expression contorted in confusion. 

“I didn’t know that.” The Doctor shook her head. “So you’ve been thinking about death?”

“No.” He rolled his lip between his teeth. “Although I suppose that would be the more obvious trail of thought. But once you get to know me you’ll realise my trails of thought are anything but obvious.” 

“I’m not sure I understand where you’re going with this then.” 

Spencer huffed out a breath, frustrated even though he was used to people never understanding him. 

“I’ve been thinking about stasis.” He mused and he watched as his therapist's brow furrowed. “Just imagine it, how boring must it have been, emotionally speaking, in the aftermath? Just stuck in the same position for hundreds and hundreds of years.” 

Doctor Santiago’s brow was furrowed so deeply her eyebrows were practically in her eye sockets. 

“But they were dead.” She stated the obvious.

“Logically I know that. But for some reason I just can’t help thinking about it. I keep having imaginary conversations in my head as if I were one of those people. Stuck in some kind of like, tragic death pose and having a conversation with the other people also resided to the same fate.” He frowned himself now as he spoke it out loud. 

It sounded even more ridiculous hearing himself say it. Was he really so bored that these were the kind of thoughts he spent his time nurturing? 

The doctor leant forward with her knees on her elbows, it was her job to quickly make assumptions about the things her patients told her and to read between the lines. 

“You feel like one of those people. Stuck in time while the rest of the world continues to move around you.” She stated it is a fact, didn’t ask. 

Spencer winced a little at her summation but nodded nonetheless. 

“People always see my IQ as a blessing, but actually a lot of the time it’s more like a curse. Boredom is so much easier for me to fall into, if my brain’s not being stimulated enough.” He ran his fingers over the crease in his slacks, hoping it would work to distract him from talking about himself. 

“And you feel like you aren’t getting enough stimulation?” She narrowed her eyes on him. 

“Not anymore. Not for a long time.” He agreed. “I love my job but it’s just not challenging me anymore. I feel like…let’s say the BAU is a city, like Pompeii. I used to love that city, but now it just feels like all the walls are tumbling down and I’ve been left covered in rubble, left in this monotonous death pose for all of eternity.” 

God that sounds morbid and very over dramatic, what is wrong with me? 

“You’re stuck in a rut.” Doctor Santiago didn’t seem perturbed, she’d probably heard a lot worse. 

“Undoubtedly.” He agreed. 

“You’re going to do something for me today.” She sat back in her chair, a smile toying at her lips which Spencer wasn’t sure he liked. “You’re going to go somewhere you wouldn’t ordinarily go, not a bookstore, not a museum. Somewhere new for Spencer Reid.” 

“That’s all?” He frowned sceptically. 

“No,” Santiago chuckled with a shake of her head. “I want you to have one conversation with someone you don’t know. Don’t talk about work, or your routine. Definitely don’t talk about Pompeii or death poses.” 

“See, here’s the thing with that,” Spencer swallowed. “In case it wasn’t clear, I am exceptionally socially awkward. I can’t just talk to a stranger. How about I come up with some conversation topics and next week we can discuss them and then-”

“Spencer,” she cut him off. “Today. It’s time to break you out of your rut, ok?” 

Goddamnit, why did I ever come here? 

***

The park was just about the least Spencer Reid place to hang out that there was, aside from maybe the beach, and he felt inherently uncomfortable. 

He was a middle aged man in a suit jacket and shirt, wandering a park on a Saturday afternoon, alone. He actually found himself willing his cell phone to ring and being called into work rather than go through with this. 

One conversation with someone he didn’t know. It was at its core a simple enough task. At least it would be for most people, people unlike Spencer who didn’t feel paralysed at the thought of talking to strangers. 

It was different at work, where part of his job was to talk to people all the time. He had some sort of authority in those situations, his presence was helping catch a killer. In the park he was out in the wild, thrown to the wolves. He was so far out of his comfort zone it made him feel nauseous. 

But for the first time in months, he wasn’t bored. And maybe Doctor Santiago had been onto something. 

He scanned the area as he meandered down the tree lined path that cut through the park, in search of someone who looked normal enough for him to strike up a conversation with. Most people weren’t alone, with their families, partners or kids or both. The only other people he noticed on their own didn’t look what Spencer would deem as normal.

He spent almost an hour wandering with the bright DC sunshine beaming down on him. Eventually he started to feel sweat gathering at the base of his neck and at his temples and ambled to the nearest bench. 

He shucked off his jacket and rolled his shirt sleeves up to his elbows. Feeling dejected and slightly fed up, he pulled his book on Mount Vesuvius out of his satchel and started reading it for approximately the seventy-sixth time. 

When Spencer was reading, his brain blocked off everything else that wasn’t directly on the pages in front of him. He couldn’t hear the sound of people chatting and laughing in the park, he could no longer feel the heat from the sun. He was lost somewhere in Pompeii. 

It was because of this that he didn’t notice the large, fluffy mutt running directly at him, or hear its owner calling for him to stop. It wasn’t until he felt something heavy pressing against his knees and his book being snuffled out of the way by a wet nose, that he looked up from the pages. 

The dog with its piercing blue eyes and a soft, fuzzy face stared at him, paws on either of Spencer’s knees and its tongue hanging dopily out its mouth. Spencer stared at the mutt for a moment or two, somewhat perplexed, before it dribbled on Spencer’s slacks and Spencer groaned in frustration.

“Gross,” He grumbled, giving the dog a soft push. “Get down.” 

The dog dropped back to the grass, but continued staring at Spencer while he found a handkerchief in his satchel and wiped his pants. 

“Beau! Beau, what are you doing?” A panted voice caused Spencer’s eyes to snap away from the dog and up to a woman running his way.

Spencer felt his chest tighten as he watched the grace with which you chased after the errant dog. 

“I’m so sorry.” You fought to catch your breath as you stopped in front of him and the dog. “He’s so much faster than me.” 

“He dribbles.” Spencer tucked the soiled handkerchief away.

“Yeah, dogs will do that.” You laughed, clipping the leash to the husky’s collar. 

“I could have been allergic.” Spencer stood up from the bench.

“Allergic to dogs?” You cocked a curious eyebrow at him.

“Dog saliva. A study showed that dog saliva contains at least twelve different types of allergy-causing protein bands.” He told you, stuffing his hands in pockets.

“Right, odd thing to say to someone you just met, but sure.” You shook your head.

“It was reported that a seventy year old woman had a severe infection of bacterium called capnocytophaga canimorsus, which likely came from her Italian Greyhound’s saliva.” He continued despite himself. 

“When was the last time you talked to an actual human being?” You pulled a face, patting Beau’s fuzzy head and causing him to mewl happily. 

“I talk to human being’s all the time.” He frowned, not understanding the question. 

“About dog saliva?” 

“No.” He shook his head. “Never about dog saliva actually.”

“Maybe don’t make a habit of it, it's kinda weird.” Your lip started to slowly curl up into a small smile. 

“Duly noted.” He shrugged awkwardly. “Does, uh…would you say this counted as a conversation?” 

Your brows knitted together, almost immediately wiping the smile from your face. 

“What would you class as a conversation?” 

“An informal talk between two or more people, in which thoughts, feelings and ideas are expressed.” He quoted the dictionary definition of the term. 

“Well, this seemed pretty informal. I shared my thoughts about you coming across as weird, as you shared your ideas about my dog’s saliva and my feelings towards it are discomfort. Seems like a conversation.” 

“I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable, I’m sorry.” He sighed to himself. “My therapist wanted me to have one conversation with one person I don’t know today and I guess I achieved that so please, don’t feel like you need to stand here and humour me any longer.” 

“I’m your homework?” The smile spread back to your lips.

“I mean, that makes it sound clinical.” 

“This was kinda clinical.” You chuckled and Spencer’s heart felt lighter than air at that sound. “Why don’t we try again. Hi, I’m Y/N and this is my dog Beau.” 

Beau barked happily at the sound of his name, his giant front paws tapping on the grass in excitement.

“Spencer.” He nodded with a tight lipped smile. “I’m sorry if I offended you or your dog.” 

“Luckily for you, neither of us are very easily offended.” You smirked, sidling past him and sitting down on the bench. 

Spencer faced you with a soft frown. 

“What are you doing?” 

“Sitting, isn’t that obvious?” You crossed one leg over the other and unclipped Beau’s leash again. “Off you go boy.”

Beau did as he was told and joyfully bounded away, but made sure to stay in your field of vision. Spencer looked between you and the husky as he started exploring trees with the use of his nose.

“You aren’t worried he won’t come back?”

“He’s very well trained. And besides, I have his favourite treats.” You patted your pocket. 

“Fair enough.” Spencer nodded and reached down for his things. “Well it was nice to meet you I guess. Have a good day.” 

“Where are you going?” You stopped him before he could walk away. 

“I, uh, was going to leave you to it?” He cradled the book and his satchel under one arm.

“You said you needed to have a conversation, so I sat down so we could have one.” You chuckled again and it was quickly becoming Spencer’s favourite sound. 

“Oh. Oh. Really? You want to have a conversation with me? After I talked about the bacteria in dog saliva?” 

“Yeah, I don’t really understand it either. But you seem…” You trailed off, unable to find the right word.

“Lonely? Creepy? Pathetic?” He tried, again causing you to laugh.

“Oddly endearing.” You corrected him. 

It wasn’t the worst thing he’d ever been called, and he’d take what he could get. He slid back down to the bench, ensuring to keep a comfortable amount of space between you and placed his bag and book in his lap. 

“Uh, just as a forewarning, I am not very good at small talk.” Spencer raked one hand through his hair. 

“Oh don’t worry, I already gathered that.” You glanced away from him towards Beau briefly before looking back at him. “So, can I ask why your therapist is making you have conversations with strangers?” 

“I’m stuck in a rut, I suppose.” He confessed, finding it strange how easy it was to want to open up to you. “My job, my personal life; it’s the same thing day in and day out. I’m just a little bored of it all.” 

“What do you do?” 

“If it’s ok with you, I’d rather not talk about it. I’m trying not to focus all of my energy, all of my personality into what I do for a living.” He rolled his lip between his teeth. 

“Ok.” You shrugged. “What are you reading?”

Spencer looked down at the hardback in his lap and turned it over to display the cover. He ran his fingers over it remembering Doctor Santiago’s specific instructions. 

Definitely don’t talk about Pompeii or death poses.

“It’s about Pompeii and the eruption of Mount Vesuvius.” He blurted out. 

“Oh, just some light and cheery reading then.” You laughed and if you kept doing that Spencer may very well fall in love with you. 

“It’s…meditative in a way.” He shrugged. “I was told

I shouldn’t talk about it.” 

“Your therapist told you topics of conversation?” You raised an inquisitive eyebrow. 

“More like she told me topics of conversations to avoid. Specifically, my thoughts on the boredom that must have been felt by these people trapped in these perpetual death poses after the eruption.” He mentally scalded himself as the words tumbled out his mouth. “Yet here I am, talking about it anyway.” 

You glared at him, noting your dog nearby out of the corner of your eye, but focusing on Spencer. He drummed his fingers awkwardly on the book cover. 

“Wow,” you inhaled sharply. “That’s gotta be one of the most depressing things I’ve ever heard.” 

“Probably why I was advised not to talk about it.” He sighed. 

“You’re a pretty dark dude.” 

“In my line of work it’s hard not to be.” He shrugged, he’d already gone against one thing Santiago told him not to do, he may as well go for broke. “I’m an FBI Agent. A profiler. I use psychology to track down serial killers.” 

Your expression didn’t change much, something which surprised him. You quickly glanced over at Beau again who was now making friends with a much smaller dog, before looking back at him. 

“That’s the same thing day in and day out?” You frowned.

“Not physically but mentally I guess. I, uh, I’m pretty smart…no that’s not true, I’m a certified genius. And that means I can grow bored easily. I guess I need a higher level of stimulation than most people.” He shrugged, noticing the way your eyes started to sparkle. 

“A higher level of stimulation, huh?” The smirk adorned on your lips and the way you spoke the word stimulation made his ears turn suddenly red. 

“Fuck,” he mumbled, his mouth dry and he had to look away from you. “Mental stimulation. Jesus Christ.” 

You smiled to yourself at his obvious embarrassment, enjoying the way you’d made him blush. You decided to change the subject, as much as you enjoyed it, you didn’t want to make him too uncomfortable. 

“So, a certified genius?” 

His eyes snapped back to you and he swallowed with a nod of his head. 

“Yeah.” 

“Well I can’t be very stimulating for you then? Mentally speaking of course.” You couldn’t help yourself. 

As predicted his blush spread to his cheeks and neck and he fidgeted with his bag on his lap. What you didn’t know was that he was trying to conceal the fact your words were causing a bulge in his pants he desperately wanted to hide. 

“Are you trying to fluster me?”

“Is it working?” Your eyes sparkled again. 

“Very much so.” He confessed. “For the record I find you utterly stimulating. Mentally speaking of course.” 

“Good to know.” You nodded, looking back across the park and spotting Beau staring at you. “Beau, heel!” 

The large and playful dog immediately started in your direction, bounding delightedly towards his owner. When he reached you, he slumped down on the grass by your feet and you popped a treat in his waiting mouth. 

“So usually after our walk I take Beau to a little cafe where they sell doggy cupcakes and I grab a coffee, unwind.” You pushed yourself to your feet and clipped Beau’s leash in place once again. 

“Oh, ok.” Spencer nodded, tucking his book inside his bag. “Have a nice time.” 

You narrowed your eyes on him, trying to ascertain if he was really this clueless or if it was just an act. You were quick to realise it was the former. 

“It was an invitation, dummy.” You chuckled. “Do you want to come with me? I love my dog but he’s not exactly…stimulating.” 

Spencer had to take a moment to compose himself before he stood as his legs trembled a little. He inhaled sharply and pushed himself up. 

“You want me to join you?” As asked by way of clarification. 

“Correct.” 

“Even after I talked about Pompeii and death poses?” 

“Even after that.” You nodded with a smile. 

“You don’t have to invite me. I was only strictly required to have one conversation so I think you’re off the hook now.” He slung his satchel over his shoulder before stuffing his hands in his pockets. 

“Are you really so naive that you don’t understand when a girl is asking you out?” 

“You are?” His eyes widened dramatically. 

“Yes!” You laughed. “Surely you’ve been asked out before?” 

“No, never. I mean, I didn’t know you were asking me out so maybe I have and I didn’t realise it.” 

“You are utterly precious, Spencer.” You shook your head. “Come on, let’s go. Unless you want to go back to your rut?”

“No, no. I am happy to be rut-less.” He nodded and the two of you, plus Beau, fell in step with one another. 

He let you lead him through the park, stealing glances at you as he did so. He’d never felt more outside of his comfort zone before and it was exhilarating. 

So many of his days had fallen away with nothing to show for them. Days upon days of the same, tedious tasks again and again. Nothing had changed for so long, every had felt the same, every time he closed his eyes. 

But finally things had changed. Letting you into his life would bring with it a shake up of his previously monotonous routine. 

He didn’t know it at the time, but his future would hold walks in the park whilst learning to enjoy the company of a dog. Random two am phone calls when you couldn’t sleep. Waking up next to your sleeping form, deep, meaningful debates in the middle of the night which would end up with lips silencing the other and body parts entwining. 

He had to look forward to your surprise visits to his office with baked goods and coffee. Sending flower arrangements to your work just to say he was thinking of you. Unplanned weekend trips to New York or Baltimore or wherever the two of you ended up. Spur of the moment date nights and spontaneous adventures, just you, him and Beau. 

But all of that was yet to come, the great unknown unfurling before him. All because he had one conversation with one person, and finally Spencer’s predictable life didn’t seem so predictable anymore.

Much like the citizens of Pompeii, who had to grow and adapt to their new city in the wake of the eruption that had destroyed so much, now it was his turn to embrace the new and uncharted. 

And quite honestly, he’d never been more excited. 

You glanced at him as you walked, a soft smile on your features and you boldly reached out and took hold of his hand in your free one. 

Spencer felt his chest explode at your touch and he already knew he never wanted to let you go. 

“So, tell me,” you asked as you strolled hand in hand. “Are you still bored, Spencer?” 

He couldn’t help the chuckle that left his lips and he gave your hand a soft squeeze. 

“I can honestly say, I’ve never been less bored in my entire life.” He sighed in content, slightly disbelieving how much his world could change just from a simple conversation. 

Today was one kind of Groundhog Day he would happily repeat over and over for the rest of his life.

#milestone celebration #spencer reid #spencer reid fanfiction #spencer reid x reader #spencer reid x you #spencer reid fanfic #spencer reid x y/n #criminal minds #criminal minds fanfiction

[greyeyedmonster-18]

never would forget how we moved

sirius x kingsley (starking)

(my submission for @cruelsummer-ficfest, my song was Starlight from the album Red. this song is truly one of my favorites. there's so much lightness and love after an album that is essentially a break-up album. this song to me is about hope for something that can be good in a sea of bla. please enjoy)

He felt seventeen again, the way his heart lept out of his chest, and the electricity surged through his veins as he stared across the garden at a man who commanded so much attention it might as well have been his occasion.

Kingsley wasn't one for ministry gatherings--at least the ones in London, preferring the ones from back home where the music went until the middle of the morning and everyone's smile seemed genuine. The ones here felt so formal. Stifling. Except for the man with the dark curly hair, and a loud laugh, who didn't seem to care about any formalities in the slightest. Kingsley took a sip out of his wine glass--even the wine was bitter--and watch as the man continued to tell a story, women, men, everyone eager to listen in and join in on the joke.

For all Kingsley knew, this man could've been speaking about the economy, inflation of galleons, and market-values, etcetera etcetera and everyone would've been enamoured. It was hard not to be. Kingsley was across the room and was still knocked out by a devil-may-care grin.

There was music playing, the kind that Kingsley listened to while studying all those years ago; "brain music" was said to be stimulating without overpowering to ensure maximum retention or something or the other, thoughts of his study skills falling sideways the closer he got to the man on the other side of the room with tiny gold hoop earrings and tattoos visible down the side of his neck. The people around him didn't even seem to know what they were laughing at anymore, keen to just be in the presence of this man.

I met Bobby on the boardwalk summer of '45...

"Excuse my interruption, I was sitting over there and heard the laughter and had to find out just what I was missing," Kingsley said, extending his hand, "Kingsley Shacklebolt. I don't think we've met."

"Now what makes you say that?" the other man asked, corners of his mouth tilting upward with amusement and silver eyes glimmered in the stars and fairylights above the garden. The crowd that had gathered around him began to disperse--Kingsley had just enough authority to be intimidating, and was just new enough to make everyone uncomfortable.

"I've never met a comedian."

"Ah now, don't tell," he responded, "that's my nighttime gig. By day, I'l just a simple member of the Wizengamot and a junior counselor."

Kingsley tried to keep his face neutral, hiding his surprise at the word junior counselor. Judging by the 5'oclock shadow and the confidence, Kingsley had pegged this man to be in his 30s at the bare minimum. And if that was the case, 30 was a bit...old.

"I see."

The other man let out a single, loud laugh, "Finally an honest reaction. Sirius Black," he dropped Kingsley's hand just as a silver platter of champagne glasses floated by, grabbing two off it with ease. He extended one of them to Kingsley, fingers covered with ornate rings that would've looked atrocious on...anyone else.

"I've heard about you," Kingsley nodded, accepting the glass, "you're giving my colleagues grey hair. I thought you'd be..."

"Better looking? I get that alot."

"Further along...legally," Kingsley cleared his throat around a sip of champagne and Sirius grinned.

"Had a bit of a quarter-life crisis and decided to step into the family business a few years later than most, reclaim my seat, so on and so forth. It's a great story," Sirius said, nodding a long with a wink.

"I'd like to hear it."

"Over dinner, maybe. Too long for drinks."

"Suppose..." Kingsley looked around, the stiff music swelling around them in a glorious crescendo, "Too long for drinks and a dance?"

For the first time since entering the conversation, Sirius looked surprised, eyebrows raising as he surveyed the scene. Telling a joke or two or three...or perhaps just being impossibly charming was one thing; dancing was a whole other.

"This isn't exactly Earth, Wind and Fire."

"All the more reason, I'll be able to hear your story better," Kingsley said with his own playful grin, stepping back toward the dance floor, champagne in hand, his other outstretched to Sirius. "I personally, love, this song. Catchy, isn't it?"

And I said, oh my, what a marvelous tune,

it was the best night never would forget how we moved.

Sirius clapped loudly, standing up at his table and cheering as Kinglsey wrapped up his speech, stepping down from the stage at the center of the room. A band was setting up behind him, the garden magically shifting from a boring ministry event to a party at the conclusion of his speech. Multi-colored fairy lights appeared in the bushes and air, reflecting on the grass. A constellation of rainbow stars everywhere they stepped. By the time Kingsley got to Sirius, he was smiling, two whiskey gingers in hand. The days of champagne and monotonous garden parties had disappeared when Kingsley became Minister of Magic, vowing in the privacy of their home that he would make the culture and climate bearable.

Telling Sirius that good thinkers, good people were too often run out of politics because of the environment and wanting to change it from the ground up.

Don't you see the starlight? Don't you dream impossible things?

"Great speech, very official," Sirius told him, kissing Kingsley quickly on the mouth once he was close enough. "I'm feeling so motivated, I want to ditch this whole thing and go straight to the Ministry to get to work."

Kingsley rolled his eyes, "That's a bit much, don't you think?"

Sirius grinned, dropping his voice and leaning close to Kinglsey's ear "You're right. However, I would ditch this whole thing and go straight to the ministry but only because your office would be completely free of interruptions..."

"Hmm..."

"Or we can get the dance floor started."

"Why not both?"

"At the same time? Minister," Sirius gasped, pressing a hand to his chest, and Kingsley laughed, leaning forward to capture his mouth in a kiss longer than the one Sirius had given him.

Their first dance had been at a party, a ministry party, right when Kingsley had transferred from Nigeria. Their second had been in the halls of Number 12 Grimmauld Place not long after, a record player in the living room playing Nina Simone.

They had lost track of dances they had shared over the years but always remembered to connect at Ministry parties. Always remembered to turn the unremarkable into a spectacle--together.

The whole place was dressed to the nines, and we were dancin'

Like we're made of starlight.

#starking #sirius black #kingsley shacklebolt #cruel summer fic fest #era number three #oh look! i did it for my own fest! #please enjoy all my starking fans #this ones for you #and for me

[dreamlandcreations]

Burnout recovery (?)

It took me a while to figure out why I was so down all the time. But I didn't take the "good news" that well tbh. Because:

"It takes an average time of three months to a year to recover from burnout. "

And I was like. NOPE. FUCK. THAT!

Well, the first few days after that were even worse because I kept pressuring myself to do something, anything other than lying in bed and staring at the ceiling. But even something as so no energy "task" as listening to music was making me... idk how else to say it other than itchy...

Anyway, eventually I just gave up, let it consume me and slept away like 2 days... AND GUESS WHAT? I felt a tiny bit better.

So I'd say the first step is just LET IT ALL FUCKING GO! Turn the nagging in your head off and stop caring about anything else than getting a good rest!

My work drove me insane for the last 3 years or so and tbh it took over my life far, far sooner than that. It wasn't healthy. Letting that go took like 2-3 weeks ( I had "help" from other tortured colleagues 🫶 talking helps!) and a lots of Youtube shorts about "this is business not personal". Yay to scrolling paralysis.

Yeah, and about that. I realised that with the burnout I really burned all the bridges that kept my autistic/adhd traits in check. I mean, I used to have a good balance, now I'm off the scale with both in the worst way.

I think the second step is just trying to stay in that kind of relaxed, "don't care" space while figuring out the reasons why I felt so terrible. Again, Youtube shorts about autism/adhd and work mentality really helped. It was like talking to someone without actually getting myself together enough to open up about this to a "real person" (it never would have happened, you know).

And this is the part from where this might not help anyone who doesn't have adhd (and autism?) but realising that I've become a shell of adhd behaviour was actually a big step. Especially with the adhd/autism traits comparison vids bc I just understood how I was functioning when I was doing all that stuff at once.

The next step(s) I took was trying to take care of myself. Eat, sleep, wash, clean up to feel better in my skin and in my environment. I made it a challenge (chasing dopamine seems to be the only way adhd brain can do stuff). Like I'll put on this song ( I wasn't really listening to it still) and do .... until it's done. It did not help at first. Just getting into a task without thought doesn't work for me. I needed to take a minute and visualise that I'm going to do this and this and this and I'll be done in 3 minutes. I prepared for the task mentally, I hyped myself up then I did it. And it worked. Then I got too much into it and overworked myself 😅

However cliché it sounds, the key is finding balance.

Now I can listen to music, I've read 14 books this year so far and reading 5 others now, and I'm planning my year and thinking about what I want to do in life.

I still have bad moments/days and that's okay. I am still not okay but I'm getting there.

I figured, I need to occupy (not overwhelm!!!) my senses to stop my mind from wandering (and torturing me) so now when I have to do something like dishes, I just put on an audiobook and try to let everything else go.

I still can't watch movies/shows. Which sucks bc I feel like I need visual stimulation too sometimes so idk what's up with that but it's a no for now.

Writing is still a NO! (that's a screaming no in my head). But I started to write down ideas again (something I didn't really do for months)

What I know would improve my health and most likely my mental state is regular exercise, but I'm not there yet. I still regularly skip/forget to eat more than once a day so that's a priority.

It's also difficult to leave the house tbh. The outside world is overwhelming and I don't go out if I don't have to (which is like once a week now).

What I do know is that if you want to do something DO NOT SIT DOWN! You'll never get it done. There's no "in a minute" or tomorrow. If you want it done, do it now.

I'm working on building a structure/routine in my daily schedule that gives me a guide so I wouldn't waste my days but doesn't limit or outright strangle me with too many limitations by being to crowded.

#ramblings #burnout #depressed #I'm feeling better #yay #? #adhd #autistic things #personal #you need at least a week off that's for sure #like totally off

[thistle-nightshade]

Reading with ADHD/BIPolar

Have you ever sat down, cracked open a book, and your brains goes, we are going to die.

And you tell your brain firmly, “No. Not dying. Reading.”

So you read one page and your brain goes Dying. Must get up immediately.

And you try and tell your brain that no, you are not in fact dying. But you realize that you haven’t comprehended a single word that you’ve read on that one page anyway. So you give up and go do something else instead.

Just me?

Reading used to be my escape when I was younger. I could disappear into a book for hours and not even realize my legs were cramping. As I grew older, it turned into more of a chore. There wasn’t enough stimulation, not enough positive impact for my brain to stay invested in a story. Books started to make me anxious, and it took me months to finish just one.

Here is what I have learned about myself that has allowed me to enjoy reading again:

Spoilers are the best thing ever.

Hear me out. The one exception to my reading hiatus was fanficiton. I couldn’t finish a book, but I could stay up all hours of the night on AO3 reading. It came down to knowing what is going to happen. Fanfiction follows known characters on new journeys and often includes a lot of really well known tropes. I could click on a new story and know exactly what to expect from the tags. This one was sad, that one had a happy ending, this one was all about a specific kink. Each new story felt safe because I knew what to expect from it.

I have recently started to incorporate this into all new media I consume. If you want me to watch a new show, you have to spoil everything for me first. My husband will pre-watch shows for me and then tell me what happens in them. My business partner recently spoiled the entire Alanna series for me. Rather than taking away from the excitement of the story, it gives me peace of mind. Instead of feeling anxious and wanting to get away from the new experience, it feels safe. I can sit back without a worry and just enjoy the tale as it unfolds.

Don’t set a 1 book limit.

My currently reading list — not to be confused with my to be read list— is 28 books long right now. I track it on StoryGraph and that sucker is SCROLLABLE. This baffles some people, but it’s a system that works for me.

I used to restrict myself to finishing the book I was currently reading before I started another. And it seriously slowed me down. There was all this pressure to slog through the words on the pages in front of me, whether I was enjoying them or not. I didn’t get much reading done that way.

Now, I start a new book whenever the mood strikes me. One thing that gets my brain involved in tasks (overcoming my executive dysfunction) is newness. A new book is exciting and I can’t wait to sink into a new world and meet new characters and taste the flavor of the writer’s writing style. That alone can often take me fifty or sixty pages into a book. But usually after that I slow down. And down. And down. Until I am not reading anymore.

But if I can pick up another new book and start the process again? Hells yes.

But what about all the unfinished books? you ask.

I return to those books when the excitement for them returns. I read a lot of different genres at once. History, culture, fantasy, sci-fi. And some things just hit right at different times. (I have been informed this is called Mood Reading). Sometimes I’m in a mental frame to tackle a big and heavy book on anti-racism. Or I can take it in small doses and read a light romance in between. Sometimes I stay in a book and a world for days, taking everything in and finishing a book. Sometimes I read a bunch of it, set it down for a few weeks or months, and then finish it later.

This allows me to read so many more books, and enjoy reading so much more, than I was before. Is it chaotic? Oh yea. Do I sometimes forget what was happening and have to recap? Occasionally, but not as much as you might think. Is every surface with relatively enough space for a book stack filled with a book stack? You bet.

It’s ok to not finish a book.

Sometimes a book just doesn’t vibe right. I used to force myself to finish a book, force myself to care about the writer’s words. I believed, and still believe, that everyone has something important to say. And I wanted very deeply to listen to all of them. But the reality is that I can’t. There are so many voices and so many books. I will focus on reading the ones that don’t drain me. If it is work to finish a book, I don’t finish it.

There are a few exceptions here. Some books are worth the effort. I try to read works from a lot of different perspectives. It’s been painful to read books that reframe the way I consider USA history. But they are important. Those books make the cut. But I give myself as much time as I need to read them. I take them in small doses, and I read something fun in between those doses.

Keep your trophies.

Part of what makes reading fun to me is displaying the corpses of dead trees that have been tattooed on my shelves. I am 100% a book hoarding dragon. I love my stash. I take aesthetic photos of my stash. I bask in it. Books and books and books arranged all around my home make me happy.

Maybe you save all the books you read from the library on digital shelves. Or you post a little blurb from all the ones you loved on your Instagram. Or you buy books and hoard them on your shelves. However you do it, keep a record of all the joy you got in reading your books. Then you can carry a little memento of that joy into the future. (This is important for those of us with shitty memories. Give yourself mementos to hold on to!)

Anyway, that is what has helped me return to loving reading.

In chaos and kindness,

Alyx

#adhd #bipolar #reading #books #neurodivergence #book dragon #spoilers #dnf #current reads

[magpie1oh1]

Where Is My Mind...

Where to begin...

I normally write privately in my physical journal, but recently, it has become more and more difficult to hold a pen with a steady hand. I love writing, but to satisfy my busy mind and quiet the silent screams that take place in my brain and body everyday, I need the writing to go a little faster. I need to get the noise out of my head and onto the digital page. I'm writing for myself. I don't want to explain my thoughts, my trauma or the dark passenger that dwells deep within me, waiting patiently for the breakthrough.

I have to write. My mind is racing today. Running on no sleep. That would be many thanks to the adderall I devoured earlier. It's my first day off in over a week and I've been craving some mental stimulation. Some intellectual intercourse. My tank is on E. My brain is beginning to atrophy. I feel so self important. A huge yuck to the people around me. I don't believe I'm being my authentic self. I have this shit fuck superiority complex that creeps up once in a while. I find myself looking at the very few friends I do have and I feel nothing. I want to feel something. I'm forcing myself to feel through these friendships, but I feel stagnant in them. 

I'm a body of water in a confined space. No current. No flow. I desperately want to move, to flood, to pour. I want to storm, but instead it's quiet. I don't find the people around me interesting or stimulating and faking my way through conversations and exhausting myself on a daily basis with the fake laughter and constantly having to be "on" is mentally exhausting and it's making me resentful. I want so desperately for someone else to pick up the slack. Allow me to power down. I'm craving a steady flow of conversation that doesn't involve work. I am not without force or vitality. I can feel it boiling inside of me, but there is no outlet. 

I value my friendships and I love them dearly and would do absolutely anything to make their lives easier and more fluid, but I am being held back. There has been no upward growth. I'm desperately trying to make my way out of the fisherman's net, but I'm constantly being pulled back in. Deeper and deeper. Not to put too fine a point on it, but I don't have much in common with them. I'm masking. My interactions with them are carefully crafted to meet each person's specific needs required for the friendship. I have just enough in common with each of them to sustain the relationship and I don't want to lose them. They matter to me, but I haven't found my equal, my counterpart, in either person. 

I have always been the soundboard in my friendships. People feel safe with me and they should feel safe. I create the space needed for each individual person in my life. Whatever their specific needs may be, I make sure they're met. I am able to relate to the sordid details of their lives without flinching or becoming uncomfortable. My childhood was filled with chaos and varying traumatic experiences, so, I'm more than just a little understanding of the fact that people's lives have static. I don't mind static.

I am the safety net, the soundboard, the comedic relief and should low tide begin to affect the flow of the conversation, I am the gravitational pull that brings it right back. At the end of the day, I am worn out and mentally exhausted. I have to self-isolate for hours to recharge my batteries and I feel like I've been fed on by a pack of energy vampires. Drained. Eaten alive. Nothing left of me or for me. 

I know how I sound. I feel all kinds of ick about myself, but I can't deny that this is how I feel and how I view my relationships with people. I'm carefully curated to fit certain needs for certain people. I have always been this way. I am not attempting to be anyone I'm not. I am simply giving others the leg room necessary to stretch and get comfortable. 

I have had very few people in my life that allowed me the luxury to just BE. I didn't have to entertain. I didn't have to perform. I was just a piece of furniture in their lives and it was wonderful. I could sit in silence, dissociate, converse, retrieve my peace and silence my thoughts because it wasn't necessary to have any. I didn't have to think or be clever or quick. I had only myself to fuel and care for. I haven't had that stillness and peace in a long time. 

I know other people must feel this way. Somewhere they're having all the same mundane conversations with people they love and care about. Muting the best parts of themselves just to give a little peace to someone else. Is it wrong? Are we ever one hundred percent ourselves? Who do we feel safest with? Where do we go to quiet the storm?

[cerebraldischarge]

R. D. Laing said, among other things, that the majority of the pain in the world is caused by trying to avoid pain.

Sure enough, we all can see that real solutions are often discouraged or discarded in favor of temporary or illusory ones. Homeless people are shoved out of certain neighborhoods using policing and/or hostile architecture - out of sight, out of mind, but it only makes their situation "someone else's problem". A politician promises higher wages, and if he keeps his promise, the prices will inevitably rise too - in the end, the policy has accomplished nothing. A drug dealer (on the streets or in a nice office - doesn't make much of a difference) promises to provide happy experiences or at least a significant dulling of sadness, and if his product works, the customer's thinking faculties are temporarily suspended or impaired in a desirable way - and then the drug wears off; the whole transaction only serves to perpetuate itself, causing the client to return every time he feels insufficiently intoxicated. A movement promises equality between the sexes, and gains enough momentum to enforce its version of social reality - but won't address the roots of sexual inequality: the physical basis of the hierarchy. If we were cynical, we could say, this way it ensures that it will always be needed. If the underlying physical condition (recurrent bleeding, reduced strength, and perhaps intellectual impairment) isn't addressed or cured, the struggle for equality can be perpetual and thus provide quite a few people with a job, in a rather Keynesian fashion.

And before you think this is just "capitalism", and the magic solution has already been found in the form of a collective system - well, in a way, you're almost right. Famine and genocide, which inevitably follow from the implementation of a socialist style of management, do solve the root problem for a lot of people. The fact that it does so in a painful, cruel, and degrading manner only bothers those who happen to care about such superfluous things. Refined leftist intellectuals may chalk it up to the necessary price to be paid for a perfect world, if they're so inclined. I wonder why they usually do so from a cozy, heated room with a well-stocked pantry behind them, but I suppose it's none of my business.

Here's the thing about economic systems, world improvement programs, ideologically motivated reality-altering propositions, and even the jaded approach of the medical industry (that is, instead of the impossible task of creating an environment that's suitable for everybody, we should be focusing on fooling ourselves into accepting the already existing conditions by means of chemical addictions, electrical stimulation, self-suggestion, or other "brain hacking" methods): all of this, and I do mean all of it, is some frantic flailing, the purpose of which is to avoid pain. Even when people voluntarily expose themselves to pain, like during a workout session, it's done with the express purpose of not having to deal with (as much) pain in the future.

Some people enjoy pain, either because they have developed a taste for it, or because they genuinely prefer some varieties - or "flavors" - of it to others. This is mostly fine as long as their practices don't require force to be inflicted upon another - in other words, if they don't hurt or enslave anyone in the process. (For the people in the back: if you are required to provide something "for free", and you don't have the option to refuse without punitive consequences, that's slavery, no matter what anyone may call it. And yes, the money you earn is included in this. Donation is voluntary, taxation is not. It's amazing that this still needs to be explained.) There are a million ways to enjoy pain, find delight in the experience, share it with like-minded folks on a voluntary basis, dealing with the inevitable chores of life one day at a time. I do not wish to shame anyone for doing so, nor do I think it's warranted to try to persuade them to do anything different. In fact, I'm happy for their happiness.

However, quite a few people would rather cut to the chase and get rid of pain altogether, at the root, by getting rid of their existence. Why are we conditioned to be afraid of them? Let's face it: the behavior that most people exhibit when confronted with such a person is obvious fearful, even panicked, behavior. Most people, when they encounter someone like this, will change the subject, silence them, run away, send them somewhere else to be someone else's problem; threaten them, restrain them, physically block them from taking certain actions; or emotionally manipulate them and then congratulate themselves about avoiding a perceived disaster. What has actually been avoided, though?

Something that will happen anyway in a few decades, typically in way more painful and inhumane circumstances, as the conclusion of a grueling, heartbreaking, sometimes mobility- and/or memory-shattering process. Congratulations, good Samaritan, you really did something great. Isn't it just so fulfilling, so meaningful? Don't break your bones patting yourself on the back…

I think one of the fundamental mistakes, one of the unspoken but pervasive bad ideas that enable this phenomenon is the theory of social contagion; the idea that "if we don't persecute the minority, our children will think it's okay to be like that, and will join them". This happened to left-handed people, autistic people, people who raised questions about religion, queer and transgender people, people who got married outside their race, and all kinds of "weirdos" through the centuries. It continues to happen in many places to this day to many of the aforementioned groups. What is very strange about this deeply embedded and extremely widespread implicit belief is that the target is often absolutely nonviolent, harmless, and in the grand scheme of things, even insignificant. Even murderers and rapists are treated with kid gloves (especially in a broader historical context) compared to an innocuous, but for some reason conspicuous behavioral minority. (I have recognized this scapegoat pattern in McCarthy's ideas, too, which is why I don't subscribe to them anymore, even though I do recognize his intent.)

Why do we, as a species, do this to ourselves?

What pain are we hoping to avoid by inflicting pain on those "weirdos" who didn't cause us any harm?

Riddle me this. I genuinely want to know.

#journal #thoughts #long text #tldr #human rights #TRTNLE #rd laing

[neon-junkie]

Ok so going off the fic with the batch taking your suppressors every once in a while, how would they be if you wind up going into heat? Would they do like a group session or assuming the heat takes a few days would they take turns? You've got this thought living in my head rent free

I do plan on writing a full fic where you go into heat, but for now, here are some thoughts. (gender-neutral reader)

I was meant to briefly write a few things for this, but uh, this is 2k words... sorry, not sorry hehe.

---

So, it all comes down to what your heat is actually like. Is it a single day thing? Does it last for a few days? Are you somewhat stable? Or are you a complete and utter mess? Are you whiny and desperate? Or snappy and demanding? So many factors to consider!

Either way, the Batch is going to help. They'll do a mixture between a group session, and taking it in turns. They chalk up a rota, and spend a few hours with you every day, taking care of your needs, however you see fit.

The first shift is spent with Hunter, of course. He's going into this blind, just like everybody else, since Tech can only find so much about your heats. You've not had one in years, so you're also uncertain on how things will go.

Hunter is extremely caring. He's heavily concerned, not just for your physical needs, but for your mental wellbeing. Hunter needs to make sure that your heat doesn't scramble your brain too much, and the second you show signs of things becoming overwhelming, he's there.

At first, he attempts to be calm and caring. He'll fetch water when needed, and ensures that you're eating, whenever you can stomach food. Hunter won't come onto you until you ask, and even then, he's still soft and gentle. Fuck, he's worried he's going to hurt you - you're hyper sensitive right now, so every touch feels tenfold.

It isn't until Hunter removes your underwear that he realises just how bad you are. Fucking hell, you stink, and Hunter has to shut his eyes and let out a deep breath as he attempts to calm himself. Curse his heightened senses, they're really not helping right now.

He wants to relieve you with his fingers and mouth, he wants to hold back as much as possible, but no matter what he does, it's not enough. You need to be full, over-flowing, stuffed to the brim, and after hours of listening to you beg, he finally snaps. Hunter swiftly fees his cock, leaving the rest of his armour still on, and pulls your knees up over his shoulders. He folds you in half, mating press style, and lets out a heavy sigh as he slides into your slick heat.

Even now, Hunter's trying so hard to be careful and gentle, but you're clawing at his armoured back, whining and moaning his name, and he decides that fuck it, he's going to pound this heat out of you, or at least attempt to. Hunter manages to keep you busy for a few rounds, enough to stabilise your heat for a few hours, until he eventually has to tap out from exhaustion.

His shift is up, thank the Maker, and he crawls back to his room due to exhaustion, leaving poor Echo to take over where he's left off.

Echo, like Hunter, attempts to be calming and gentle with you. It doesn't take a genius to realise that Hunter's just spent the last few hours tending to your needs, mainly because the air stinks of sex, but for now, you're stable.

Echo has a nap with you, letting you curl up against his chest, huddled under the warmth of your blankets. Thankfully, you manage to get some rest, only to wake up hours later with that throbbing pain between your thighs again. Your whimpers wake Echo up, and he's greeted to the sight of you mewling in his arms, grinding yourself against his thigh as your heat worsens as every second passes.

Sadly, Echo isn't entirely sure what to do. He's not hooked up with anyone since before Skako Minor, and despite not losing his cock in the blast, he hasn't really touched himself since then. He considers himself to be inexperienced, somewhat of a virgin, and he can't keep eye contact as he explains that to you. However, he insists that he wants to help, he just needs you to take the lead.

Despite the overwhelming desire to mate, you manage to suppress your needs, enough to give Echo the reassurance that he requires. This time, you're the one being gentle as you straddle him, slowly undressing him whilst you make out. Echo is the one whimpering as you slide down onto him, holding yourself steady until he gives you the signal to move.

Fuck, you're aching, burning up between your thighs, but you continue fighting your natural urges. Echo notices this, and encourages you to pick up the pace, telling you that he's content and relaxed with how things are going. You trust him, and you know that if he needs you to stop, he'll tell you to. With that knowledge in mind, you pick up your pace.

To your surprise, Echo begins bucking up into you. Your heat is so damn tight, wet, slick, and ah- Echo only manages to last a single round. Knowing that you're aching right now, he swiftly cleans himself up, and leaves a gentle kiss on your forehead as he tells you that he's going to get you more help.

Tech is surprisingly not on his holopad as he enters your room. He's somewhat formal, informing you that he's here to tend to your needs, and help however possible. You're biting back a laugh, but your cheeky smile is wiped off your face as Tech shows you the little device that he's been working on this whole time.

It's some sort of vibrator. You're able to attach it wherever you need it to go, and Tech helps fasten it in place, smirking to himself when the device turns on, and you instantly let out a groan. It's perfect, stimulating you enough to keep most of the heat down, but you're still aching to be filled up.

Tech has no problem filling in that role, and informs you that mating press is the perfect position to hit all the right spots. He swiftly strips down before manhandling you into position, and wastes no time sliding into you, letting out a groan as his cock begins filling you up. Of course, Tech's thrusts are calculated and accurate, paying attention to how you react to different angles, speeds, and so on. You tell him exactly what you want, and Tech delivers.

With Tech's accuracy, and the vibrating device working away, you reach peak multiple times, as does Tech. He fills you up, over and over, until you're overflowing with his (and the others) loads. Tech can't help but push his leaking release back into your hole, making a smug comment about how you seem to be so desperate to be filled up, yet you can't even hold onto what he gives you? Tut tut.

He's sweating by the time you two are finished, both out of breath, exhausted, and somewhat stable. Tech makes quick work of cleaning both of you up, and doesn't bother redressing as he crawls into your bed, pulling you tightly against his chest. Your heat is far from over, but for now, you can enjoy some more rest, before the next Batcher comes along to tend to your needs.

Wrecker is up next, and thankfully, he brings food! Haven just woken up, your heat hasn't returned to its agonizing state, so for now, you can enjoy some snacks whilst you and Wrecker mindlessly chat away.

After snacks and a cuddle, your heat begins building up once more, and Wrecker seems surprisingly eager to help you out. You've spent the last day being pounded over and over, leaving your hole open and leaking, giving Wrecker an advantage when he slips his thick cock into you. The others have filled you up perfectly, but Wrecker is something else, boarder lining painful. He remains still as you adjust to his size, and when you're ready, he goes slow.

However, Wrecker holding back and going slow only seems to make you worse, and you practically have to beg to get him to speed up. He knows he's big, and he doesn't want to hurt you, but seeing as you're almost in tears from the sensation between your thighs, Wrecker decides to pick up the pace.

When Wrecker delivers, he delivers, and goes above and beyond to help you out in any way possible. He's worth the stretch, and his massive frame is doing things to you, peering up through your hazy eyes to see nothing but Wrecker, towering over you, keeping you pinned beneath him as he fucks you senseless.

Wrecker's grunting and moaning as he cums, and he only needs to stop for a few, brief seconds before picking up speed again. How he can fuck like this is a mystery to you, but you're not going to ask questions, especially when you're this cock-dumb.

Finally, after hours of progress, and days of your overall heat, the burn is slowly starting to settle down, and it's only taken four men to help you out! Wreckers' load spill out of you when he finally pulls out - not like your bed isn't already soaked. He wraps you in a blanket and settles you on the floor as he pulls on some light clothing and strips your bedding, insisting on cleaning up before the final person takes over his shift.

When your bed is remade, you're left bundled up in it, and Wrecker ensures that he's smothered you in more than enough kisses before leaving your room.

Crosshair takes a while to arrive, and you almost drift back to sleep whilst waiting. He's brought you some water, and helps you up as he hands it over. He doesn't say anything, at first, but when he finally speaks, all he tells you is that your room stinks. Like, it reeks, and it's drifted out and smothered the entire ship. Crosshair is laughing as he tells you that Hunter has had to camp outside, as the smell is really getting to him, but Crosshair is here to finish things off.

Crosshair makes a comment about how you've saved the best for last, and places the kindest, most tender kiss you've ever felt on your temple, before he shrugs the blanket to you and gets to work. Whilst the others have been gentle in their own ways, Crosshair isn't - he knows what you need, and he's insistent that he's going to be the one who fucks this heat out of you.

Crosshair wants you on all fours, head down, ass up, wrists pinned behind your back. You're still stretched out from Wrecker's thick length, and Crosshair's chuckling as he slides in, making comments about how fucked out you are, about how you need five different men to satisfy you, about how needy and forgetful you must be if you forgot to take your supplements.

As Crosshair's pounding into you, you can feel everybody's previous loads being pushed from your hole, dripping onto the bed. Ugh, the covers are going to need changing again, but that chore disappears from your mind as Crosshair slips two of his fingers in alongside his cock, fingering you as he fucks you in an attempt to keep you full.

He can't help but make even more comments, both praising and mocking you for how well you're taking his fingers and cock. After the first set of orgasms, Crosshair flips both of your bodies over, and lays back on your bed. He has you lie on him, your back against his chest, and he holds your legs up against your shoulders as he begins fucking up into you.

Crosshair is grunting against your ear, leaving the occasional mark on your neck. He's not holding back - why would he? This is what you need, and Crosshair's here to supply it. One hand moves from your legs and wraps around your throat, whilst the other slips between your thighs to touch you feverishly. He's ordering you to cum for him, demanding it, and the final orgasm that you have almost causes you to black out.

During your hazy, fucked-out state, Crosshair carefully rolls you off him, and begins taking care of you. He cleans you up, helps you put some light clothing on, and curls up into bed beside you. Crosshair's large frame wraps snugly around you as he takes the position of big spoon, planting gentle kisses on your shoulder as he asks how you're feeling.

Finally, your heat is over, and now comes the following soreness from being fucked silly over the past few days. Oh well, it was fun, and maybe now you'll learn to take your supplements regularly?

#this was fun as fuck to write #tbbwriting #swwriting #nsft #the bad batch #the bad batch x reader #tbb x you #reader insert #gn!reader #gender neutral reader #smut #hunter x you #tech x you #echo x you #wrecker x you #crosshair x you #the bad batch x you

[hanazuma-inactive]

Hello, can i request with 2 characters? It's Semi and Ushijima with top male reader. Reader and Ushijima are couple. Their relationship is mostly Ushi being sub and will do anything reader told him to. Also reader a bit manipulative? Well it's easy for him to make someone do his bidding.

Reader told Ushi to touch himself inside an empty room while reader watching him and he order him not to cum without his instructions. Earlier that day, Reader told Semi to come to the room after school end and when he did appeared, he saw Ushi playing with his own body. The sight made him hard and reader whispering things that stimulate him more and usher him to mess up Ushi.

Reader enjoying the scene because he knew that Semi has feelings for Ushi and he's happy because he get a new toy to play with. After Semi cum inside Ushi, Reader pull him toward himself and pounding him hard till he collapse from the overstimulation. Also reader didn't neglect his boyfriend that's been begging him to fuck him and let him cum.

wrapped around your fingers, (nsfw) ushijima x top!reader x semi

pronouns: he/him (FEMALE ORIENTED DNI!)

warnings: degradation, 3 some, hella manipulation, adultery kinda (?), daddy kink a little, there's also some dumbification and some random usual top reader kinks i slapped in there and publuc sex kinda me thinks

a/n: i love these types of request, dark but definitely fun to write, i lean bottom but this was still really 🛐

_____

"c'mon semi, look at your crush over there~ all riled up, touching himself, and begging to cum. won't you help him out a little?" you said pointing at ushijima, still with a vibrator inside his ass. 

"y/n, p-please stop… this isn't right and you know it."

"oh i know very well it isn't, but who the fuck is gonna come and stop me? certainly not you with that hard-on in your pants." 

you wanted to ruin ushijima more and more everyday, that's why you came up with the plan of completely breaking his mind with a particular someone else in mind. semi eita, one of the setters for the volleyball team. you knew he had a crush on ushijima ever since second year but ushi chose you over him. his feelings didn't die away and in fact it probably grew stronger than before. you wanted to take this chance to also mess with him a little, and see what kind of interesting scene will happen in front of your eyes. 

_

bored, once again. it wasn't because you weren't satisfied with the relationship you had, you just simply wanted more risk and fun in it. ushijima is a very nice boyfriend even if he can be dense sometimes. he's obedient, especially to you. whatever you ask of him he'll almost always do it without fail. whether it was in the streets or in the sheets. the two of you were just out eating ramen till the filthy idea came rushing into your head. 

after going home, you told your boyfriend to wait for you in the storage room afterschool tomorrow and answer a video chat with only his video on. you whispered some questionable instructions into his ears and handed over him a small box for him to put in his backpack later. you told him not to open the box until tomorrow and he listened like a good boy. the rest of the night went on as usual but you were excited to see what will happen tomorrow.

during class the next day you continued to remind ushijima about last night and told him to make sure not to forget about what's suppose to happen later today. while you were enjoying lunch with your boyfriend you nearly forgot to inform the other person about this. you strolled in the semi's classroom casually and walked over to his desk finding him writing the homework that hasn't even been assigned yet.

"heyyy semi, how's it going?" you said with a sly look on your face. 

"oh hey y/n, i'm doing fine, do you need something?" semi said putting his pen down. 

"i was wondering if you had time afterschool today?" 

"i'm afraid not, i have something to attend to after school today, sorry about that." 

"are you sure you can't come? i would really appreciate it if you do, it's something quite important." 

"i really wish i could but i wouldn't want to push this off either-" 

"wakatoshi is going to be there." 

the air stiffened around the classroom as you saw semi tighten his fist. you knew he couldn't resist ushijima, and you didn't want to have to pull out this card either but he left you no choice. you can and will do anything to get what you want. semi turned his head but gave you a light nod in return. that was his signal of submission. 

"i'll see you 15min after school on the balcony~" you said with a smug look and your hands inside your pocket. 

the rest of your classes were so boring you nearly fell asleep. you wanted to get outta there and just carry out the rest of your plan. you were horny and you couldn't do anything about it, the thought of just fucking ushijima on his desk came into your mind a few times but was quickly brushed away after a while.  

you quickly left your seat after class after giving your boyfriend a kiss on the forehead and a small wink. you headed over to the balcony of the school while ushijima headed over to the storage room waiting for your video call. ushijima found out what you gave him in the little box and understood exactly what you meant. he loosened himself up and put in the vibrator at a low setting just like you asked. he then dialed your phone with nothing on but his shirt. 

"y-y/n, i did what you asked, is this good enough?" ushijima said with little moans coming out of his mouth. 

"that's it good boy, such a little slut for me aren't you?" 

ushi nodded his head while attempting to push the vibrator deeper inside him. 

"remember now, no cumming until i say so, alright darling?" 

"yes sir h-hah~" 

you let out a low giggle and put your phone inside your pocket on mute to greet the grey hair male in front of you. 

"hey semi, you're here." 

"yes, where is ushijima? i need to go soon." 

"woah woah what's the rush? follow me, i'll lead you to him."

semi was confused by what you meant but followed anyways. you led him to the storage room and told him to open the door himself. semi's heart began to race, afraid of what might be behind that door. his hands shook at the handle but eventually gained the courage to open it. he closed his eyes and pushed the door to see a heavenly sight he wouldn't even have seen in his dreams. 

ushijima was on the floor wearing nothing but a t-shirt, his eyes closed, moaning your name and playing with his nipples. you ordered him to not cum without your permission so there he is. left on the floor alone, edging himself, desperate to be a good boy for you. ushijima opened his eyes after hearing the door of the storage room creak. out of panic he covered his hard cock and sat up straight, only to find one of his best friends and his boyfriend standing in front of him.

"y-y/n? semi? what are you guys doing here?!" 

"aww look at you, following my instructions, good boy." 

"y-y/n! what is this?!" 

"hey darling, i never said you could stop, did i? now go on, keep pleasuring yourself, and if you do a good job i might just let you cum~" 

"y-yes daddy…" ushijima said as he returned to the position he was in before. 

"y/n! what are you doing! w-why did you even bring me here!" semi shouted out of rage. 

"c'mon semi, look at your crush over there~ all riled up, touching himself, and begging to cum. won't you help him out a little?" you said pointing at ushijima.

"p-please stop… this isn't right and you know it."

"oh i know very well it isn't, but who the fuck is gonna come and stop me? certainly not you with that hard-on in your pants." 

you were right, semi cock couldn't have been harder in his life. seeing his crush fucking himself with a vibrator and begging like a slut. he just couldn't control himself anymore. semi took off his pants and his cock bounced out of his underwear. he didn't even bother lubing himself up, he wanted to make ushi hurt, make him suffer for choosing you over him. while all of this was happening you were simply just an audience, enjoying the show put in front of you. 

"yah fuck you, fucking slut… such a pretty little whore for y/n over there huh? fucking take my cock bitch!" semi grunted. you could hear the rage coming from his voice and that only excited you more. 

ushijima was already out of breath, busy being fucked by semi. eyes rolled back, his tongue sticking out and his soft, overstimulated dick bouncing each time semi shoved further into him. 

you walked over to semi and whispered into his ear. 

"how good does it feel? to finally get what you wanted after so long." 

"shut the fuck up, a-ah you fucking bastard!" semi said as he came into your boyfriend, grunting and moaning out of anger. 

at this point ushijima was pretty much passed out but you haven't had your fun yet. while semi was trying to catch his breath, you quietly unbuckled your belt behind him and revealed your hard cock. you grabbed semi's hands behind him quickly and shoved your dick right into his ass, with no lube whatsoever. 

"a-ah! what the fuck y/n fucking- let me go! what are you h-hah~" 

"wow…look at you semi, just like your little crush over there you are also now getting fucked like a slut huh?" you said in a teasing manner. 

"fuck off a-ah… why are you doing this!" 

"oho? tired of playing nice are we? this is simply just payback, for fucking my boyfriend dumb. in return, i'm going to do the same for you~" 

if semi actually had the strength to fight back he would. however with the giant cock head hitting his prostate over and over again it makes it hard for him to even talk. you kept whispering sweet words into semi's ears telling him how good of a slut he is, fucking someone's brains out and immediately getting the same treatment. sooner or later you fucked the male onto the floor, ass filled with cum and so broken that he can't even stand up anymore. 

and there they were, both of your playthings, wrapped around your finger.

#haikyuu!! #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu x reader smut #haikyuu x male reader #haikyuu x m!reader #haikyuu x male reader smut #haikyuu x top male reader #haikyuu x top m!reader #haikyuu x top reader smut #hq fanfic #hq x reader #hq smut #haikyuu smut #ushijima #ushijima wakatoshi #ushijima x reader #ushijima smut #ushijima x male reader smut #semi #semi eita #semi x reader #semi smut #semi x male reader smut #ushijima x reader smut #semi x reader smut #hq semi #hq ushijima

[hollyhomburg]

Color me pretty

(Bts Little space au)

Summary: When it came to the littles, the caregivers knew there was no better activity than coloring. 

Tags: SFW, implied bts x reader, pure fluff, little space, little! kookie, Little! m/c, Caregivers! bts, 

W/c: 1.5k

A/n: If you don’t like this kind of content please just skip over it and pay it no mind! this is very sweet and fluffy. this can be read alone, but i did use the characters from my other little space ask au titled ‘the peanut butter to my jelly’ it’s linked at the end of the fic!  i wrote this drabble in one sitting! 

- On the nights that Koo and the m/c are non-verbal but still feeling energetic enough to need stimulation the caregivers have a special little ritual that they like to do. 

- it’s something tucked away, always ready to have on hand when they need it, it never fails to calm an overly excited or sugar high little; the blanket made out of a special material that can be washed after it’s doodled on, painted, and made new. 

- On those special days, the caregivers bring around all their ‘messy blankets’ the fort making supplies that no one minds if they get ruined, if koo gets his apple sauce on it or if a sippie mistakenly gets it’s lid taken off. they make a nest in the living room with markers and crayons and they’re allowed to get the blanket as colorful as possible. 

- The blanket is magic in the littles eyes! filled with simple flowers that they can color in as many times as they want! All the laundry fairy (Taehyung) has to do is pop the blanket in the washer and voila! it’s all ready for more coloring! no more marker marks. 

- I just picture her and Koo stretched out on it with half of their stuffed animals for “moral support” while cartoons play in the background coloring to their hearts content. Koo gets a little younger in his headspace sometimes than the m/c though they’re pretty equal in general.

- Eventually koo just gets so small that he forgoes coloring all together, instead busying himself with sucking on the end of a marker. while the m/c just giggles with her tongue hanging out, swinging her feet, the picture of adorable concentration as she struggles to keep her pink marker inside the lines.

- Occasionally one of the caregivers will come in to check on them. And they’d come pet over their heads and koo and the m/c just excitedly gesture to the mess they’ve made! their brains too cottony to make many words other than “flower! made’ pink!!!” koo in his little sing song voice going “flower flower flower~” 

- And whichever caregiver who is on “baby duty” will praise them, today it’s yoongi who takes a second to sit, each of the littles tucked under an arm. yoongi leaning in close and tracing his finger along their pretty lines. “you guys got so far today! almost all of them are filled!” he loves how puffed up both of your chests get at the praise. 

- He can almost tell how far down they were when they first started coloring. on the outside border the flowers are carefully patterned, but the ones just under where you where sitting are full of wilds scribbles. Yoongi reminds himself to take a picture before they wash it, wanting to save a memory of today. 

- “Oh did you make this for us little ones? I bet Joonie’s going to love it you know how much he loves nature! and you even gave each of them little stems.”

- And of course, eventually they find the m/c and koo are asleep in their little puddle of markers. Maybe the m/c has a little bit of purple splotch on her cheek. After they wake them up to put them to bed she whines softly when they clean it off her cheek “oh you poor fussy baby, don’t worry it will only take a second” her cute pout demanding a kiss for every rub.

- Eventually she presses into bed and koo kisses the faintly red spot on her face. his kiss a little wet and open mouthed but so innocent it makes the caregivers bookending them on either side coo. it’s as much of a sorry as koo can articulate right now. his mind feels like marshmellows and stuffed animals, like a too squeezed juice pouch and an empty packet of fruit snacks. totally devoid of big scary thoughts. 

- The caregivers are glad they made the decision to throw out all and every permanent marker in the house after the last little incident when Koo decided that people were a viable canvas. I think their whole house would be full of little doodles from the two littles. When they get big they always blush and say that they don’t need to pin them to every available surface. But the caregivers just shush them because they honestly love their drawings. 

-To the caregivers, their collection of drawings is a representation of the love they have for their two youngest. A mark of a healthy relationship- that they can give love in a way that matters to the two of them. Maybe jimin gets a tattoo of one of their flowers, a little purple one for koo and a pink one for the m/c on his hip at once point. 

- Maybe one day the m/c has what they affectionately call a ‘tiny day’ where she’s small and can’t seem to snap out of it. she tries valiantly, but after that catch her pouting down at her coffee and staring wistfully at her stuffy on the bed they tell her it’s okay. she can be small today and they’ll handle all of the big thoughts. 

- Of course they can’t stay home because they have a track due soon, and alas they are adults, so certain things have to be accounted for. There have been many times that the m/c has had to pretend to be at least a little big in public, luckily for the caregivers their littles are always remarkably well behaved. 

- They treat it as a game, today, bunny is a secret agent and cannot be discovered by anyone, sent to protect the princess. Nothing can happen to her as long as bunny’s there. But no one can see bunny- or else his powers are nullified. It does the trick. They love to see her nodd seriously when Tae weaves the story for her. it makes their heart hurt when they catch her talking to the bunny. “i gots you.” it makes it so hard to seperate from her for the day. 

- Seokjin packs up a day bag and gets her in the comfiest clothes possible and she spends the whole day quietly coloring in the corner of Joonie’s studio with her favorite bunny stuffie in her lap. She’s always careful to tuck him under her blanket and hide him whenever someone comes knocking, pretending to tap away on Namjoon’s tablet, but luckily no one pays her much mind, used to her presence. 

- When the noise and the stimulation gets too much for her namjoon puts her in a pair of noise canceling headphones that play soft nature sounds and pretty soon when he turns around to check on her he finds she’s nodded off in his couch. And he gets up to fix the blanket around her before he goes back to work for a few more hours. 

- She’s still asleep when the others finish up and decide to pry joonie away from work (a feat in itself) and when the others softly knock at the door she gets up, all bleary-eyed and honestly half-asleep rubbing at her eyes with a closed fist. almost tripping in happiness when she sees jungkook. hitting into his chest with a little ooof, almost tripping to get out of her blanket. So excited to see him- her favorite playmate “Koo play now!? koo get tiny!!!??” 

- Already the stress is weighing on Jungkook’s shoulders, his eyes getting all misty when he sees her bunny and the blanket and just wants to regress so bad. He starts to help her clean up the day bag but seokjin and Namjoon ease him away from it.

-  “You’ve got to watch her for us Kookie, can you do that? can you be a good boy?” by now they know how to softly nudge Jungkook into his headspace and it does the trick, lets him have a task before he can truly let go. they end up giggling softly with their foreheads pressed up against each other, telling stupid little jokes that are no doubt from jin and playing with each others hands. 

- On the ride Home, they both hold onto one of bunnies ears in the backseat of their car. Their heads loling by the time they pull into their safe underground parking garage ready for some snuggles and probably a nice relaxing bath for kookie because he hates feeling sweaty from practice when he’s little. He Just wants to sit and play with some bubbles and bath toys while someone runs shampoo through his hair, the soft-smelling kind that's meant for babies.

- Inevitably Koo always looks up from his bubble bath and points at himself and says “baby?” Hobi nods sagely while smoothing his hair into a goofy mohawk, “baby” he agrees.  

- But that’s not exactly true- the better term would be ‘their babies’

~Fin~ 

Please reblog and comment! Likes are nice- but they do little to support content creators! 

(You can find more little space content here)

#bts x reader #bts little space #bts age regression #jungkook x reader #bts fluff #bts comfort #little space #bts littlespace #bts #bts fanfic #bts au #bts poly au #jeon jungkook x reader #bangtan sonyeondan #sfw bts

[ushiluv]

Late Night Drive 

skate rat!suna x reader 

When you accepted Suna’s confession, you did not know that it also meant accepting to go on a late night car ride with him to the other side of town to vandalize some old skate park that “belonged” to a bunch of guys he didn’t like. (wc: 2330)

warnings 

anal, squirting, overuse of pet names, reader has female anatomy, use of daddy, sex in public but there’s no one around, overstimulation, this is kinda really fluffy, cervix fucking, use of the word cunny, let me know if i missed anything! not proofread yet 

note from the author 

 i really enjoyed writing this so i hope you guys will like it! let me know what i can improve. 

“Are you sure you wanna do this?” you asked as you sat yourself down on the passenger side of your boyfriend’s car.

“Of course, princess, when have I ever not been sure of something?” he responded with a sly grin on his face.

“ ‘m just saying we could be in a lot of trouble if we get caught.”

“We won’t.” he made sure you put your seatbelt on and started the car “And if we do, you could just show them your tits and-” the punch you landed on his arm stopped him from finishing his sentence.

“You’re horrible.” you mumbled under your breath.

He didn’t respond, opted to offer you a chuckle and a squeeze to your thigh instead.

Suna was quite the phenomenon and you’d be lying if you said that you didn’t have a crush on him prior to his confession. Truth be told, you had no idea he was into you; that’s why his confession came in as such a shock. You thought he was joking, so you lightly laughed when he spilled his heart out to you on a friday afternoon in a park near Inarizaki High. But the frown on his face and broken look in his eyes showed in every way possible that he was, in fact not lying. That’s why you quickly apologized and accepted his confession before admitting your own feelings towards him. You knew what kind of student he was and what he did in his free time, but you had no idea that he would ever drag you down with him in his rebellious tendencies.

After a few minutes of small talk backed up by Suna’s late night music playlist, you two arrived at the infamous abandoned skatepark. He got a bag full of spray paint cans from the backseat and handed you a pretty pink one.

“Thought of you when I bought it” he said after putting a black hoodie on.

A smile appeared on your face. “Oh how romantic of you my dear Rinnie.”

“Shut up.” he grumbled before getting out of the car.

After putting on one of his hoodies that he left purposely in the car for you, you got out and followed his footsteps. The place lived up to its name, it was abandoned. The rails were rusty, the bowls were full of dirt and weeds and the ramps seemed impossible to skate on. But, for some reasons that were unknown to you, not a single graffiti could be found on any surface. Your lovely boyfriend seemed to be the first one who had the idea of giving the palace new colours.  

“Why do people even come here? Seems gross to me.” you said as you took a closer look to the middle of one of the bowls. You swore you could smell death from it.

Suna shook the spray can he was holding. “Dunno.” He took your arm with his free hand and dragged you away from the bowl. “Just know they care a lot about this place for some reason. Come on now, I don’t wanna spend the night here.”

You followed him (not like you had a choice) and got ready to do your own share of damage. Suna giggled as he spray painted dicks and curse words all around the oh-so-important place and you could do nothing else than roll your eyes at his childish actions while you painted neon pink doodles. As you watched him paint a curse word that you were sure could not be found in any dictionary, you realize how deep in love you were with that man. Thoughts about your future together started fogging your brain and you could feel your cheeks heat up at the idea of spending the rest of your days with him.

“Babe look at- What’s wrong?” your arms suddenly flew around his waist and your face found place on his chest.

“Just thinking about how much I love you.”

You felt Suna relax as he placed a kiss on the top of your head.

“I love you too, baby, but look at what I just painted!” he turned you around, excited to show you his new artwork (if you could call it that).

It took about another twenty minutes for him to be completely satisfied with his new art piece. The place was definitely more colourful now, you had to admit that. Suna threw his cans and yours in his backpack and walked back to his car, hand in hand with yours.

He unlocked his door only and threw his backpack in the back as you waited for him to unlock your door so you could get it, but it seemed like he had other plans on how to end the night.

He walked around the car and reached to you, caging you between him and the car, arms on each side of your head.

“What are you doing?” you huffed.

He leaned down and licked the shell of your ear. “Just rewarding my princess for helping me tonight.” he whispered before leaving a trail of kisses down your neck.

Taking a hold of your shoulders, he moved you onto the hood of his car, bending you down against it. His hand moved from your shoulders to down your spine before finally squeezing your ass through your thin leggings.

“Been so good to me tonight, think you deserve a reward” he gave your ass a light squeeze.

“Y-yeah Rin, please.” it was crazy how that man managed to always make you forget how to talk.

As he knelt down on the concrete, he didn’t care about how you didn’t address him properly, he didn’t care about the little rocks that were digging in his knees through his sweatpants, all he cared about was making you feel good. He pulled down your leggings and panties, down enough for him to have a proper look at your already drenched pussy. He hummed to himself and thanked God, the Universe or whatever divine entity that was the reason for you to be in his life.

He didn’t waste any time and brought a finger to your already gaping hole, playing with it as he watched in awe at how much wetter you were getting from his ministrations.

“My little slut is getting turned on because she’s gonna get fucked in public?” he spoke “You’re so messy, princess, wish you could see this yourself.”

“Ah-” you jolted as you felt a finger penetrate you, “don’t tease me, daddy.”

“ ‘m not teasing, doll, you’re just eager.”

He removed the finger that was just in you and brought it to his mouth, sucking and licking at your juices that stuck to it.

“You always taste so good. Gonna let me have another taste, baby? Gonna let me eat your pretty cunny out in public?”

You whimpered. “Yes, yes yes, daddy please, wanna feel your mouth on me.” the cold metal of the hood started feeling really hot under your burning cheek.

“Whatever princess wants, princess gets.”

Suna gave a lick with a flat tongue to your labia, gathering your wetness in his mouth before wrapping his lips around your clit. His tongue switched from playing with your little bundle of nerve to licking your hole. The stimulation drove you crazy, you could feel yourself become closer at every flick of his tongue on your clit. He suddenly removed his mouth from your pussy and switched his tongue for his fingers. The sensation made you squeal from surprise. Three of his fingers were now filling your hole while his thumb took care of stimulating your hardened clit.

“Gonna try something, doll, alright?”

Too busy chasing your high, you nodded eagerly. You had no idea what he was saying, the only information you picked on from his voice was that he asked you a question and you trusted Suna with all your heart. That’s why your whole body jolted when you felt a finger press against the ring of your asshole.

“Rin!”

“Shh, focus on how good I’m making you feel. Can feel you clenching around my fingers, puppy, this is gonna make you feel even better.”

He spat against your hole and allowed the tip of his finger to go past the rim. The sensation was nothing like anything you’ve ever felt before but you couldn’t say you didn’t like it. You only were closer to your climax when you felt his finger try to go deeper.

“Fuck! Daddy!” you screamed as you gushed around his three digits.

“That’s a good girl, fuck.” Suna praised. “Fuck, you never came so hard. I knew that you were a slut but I didn’t know you were such a dirty one.” he teased as he let you ride out your orgasm. “Just need a finger in your other hole to make you squirt, uh?” his dirty words made you whine in protestation, you didn’t even know you could cum like that.

You pushed his hand away when the rubbing against your clit made you feel too overstimulated.

“Stop it daddy… ‘s too much.”

He got up and manhandled you onto your back.

“I know baby, just need to feel you cum around my cock now. Can you do that for me? Gonna be a good doll and squirt on my cock? Promise this will be all for tonight.”

You nodded weakly, still trying to get over the aftershock of the powerful orgasm you just had. He grinned at you and leaned down to kiss your mouth, leaving a small taste of yourself on your lips. His hands reached down for the hoodie you were wearing and the shirt underneath it, he pulled both up enough to have a view on your pretty tits.

“Knew you were not wearing a bra.” he gave a playful pinch to your nipples.

You whined and pushed his hands away before reaching down to the band of his sweatpants to remind him of what he was supposed to do with you.

“You’re so impatient, princess, you’re lucky I love you” he mumbled.

Your heart warmed up at his words, they were like a little reminder that you were his and he was yours. “I love you too, daddy.”

He completely took your legging off and pulled his sweatpants and boxers down to his thighs. His cock was hard and red, the mere sight of it was enough to make you drool. Bringing a hand around its base, Suna started to run his tip over your puffy clit, allowing his cock to be coated of your wetness.

“You’re so shamelessly messy, puppy.” he moaned as he put the tip in, “and so fucking tight. God, no matter how many times I fuck you- you were made to take my cock, right doll? No one else’s.”

“Hmm- Only yours daddy! ‘Was made to only take you”

He groaned as he bottomed out, the wetness of your previous orgasm making it so much easier. Remembering how hard you came earlier, he started fucking you harder with the only goal in mind to make you gush as hard as he just did. The tip of his cock was kissing your cervix and reaching that one spongy spot only him could reach. You were seeing stars- figuratively and literally.

“Daddy you’re so deep” you moaned.

“I know baby, but you love it right? You love having me this deep. Say it.”

“I love it daddy! No one- no one else can fuck me like you do.”

Satisfied with your answer, Suna didn’t take mercy on you and started pounding harder into your gummy walls. Feeling you clench around him, he spat on your hardened clit and started toying with it with his thumb, just like you liked. The added stimulation only heightened your senses. You could feel everything, from the way his thumb was rubbing circles around your clit to the hard vein on his cock that felt painfully good every time he thrusted into you. Before you knew it, your orgasm started building up in you much more powerful than the one you previously had.

“Da- Daddy ‘m gonna make a mess again.”

“Yeah? Gonna gush around me? Come on pretty I know you can do it, gonna make your pretty little cunny cum.”

His other hand started toying with your hard nipple and that pushed you over the edge, cunt spasming around him and juices squirting on his old black hoodie, you came on the hood of your boyfriend’s old car. You moans were nothing compared to the grunts and groan that left Suna’s mouth, he seemed to be enjoying this more than you did.

“Fuck, you’re so perfect.” a few more thrust inside your walls were enough for him to spill his load into you.

He leaned down on you and hugged you, chest pressed against yours. You two stayed like that for a second, in a comfortable silence just enjoying each other’s presence. After a while, he pulled out of you with a wince as he saw his cum spill out of your hole. He was quick to pick up your leggings and panties and helped you put them back on.

“Don’t waste precious cum.” he said as you pulled your leggings up.

“Maybe if you stopped fucking me raw-”

“Shh, you love it.”

He pressed a kiss to your temple and opened the car door for you.

“Get in, we’re getting food.”

You excitedly clapped your hands, ready to spend some more time with him.

“And then we’re going back to my house, really gotta make you squirt again.”

“You’re a fucking perv, Suna Rintarou.”

“You’re in love with this perv.”

You smiled, because that was the complete truth.

na: sorry for the rushed ending im exhausted </3 

#suna rintaro scenarios #suna rintarou #suna x you #suna x reader #inarizaki #inarizaki x you #inarizaki x reader #suna fluff #suna smut #skaterat suna #hq smut #hq fluff #haikyuu fluff #haikyuu!! #haikyuu smut #haikyuu scenarios #suna x y/n #inarizaki x y/n

[sirthisisa-wendys]

To Heaven and Back: Geto Suguru x Fem!Reader

synopsis: Surfing isn't always done on the water.

wc: 1.5k

tw: NSFW (minors DNI)

“You did pretty well out there,” you hear over your shoulder, and you turn to face the handsome surfing instructor that happened to be your friend’s brother-in-law. “You’re a friend of Nissa’s?”

“Yeah,” you begin, pushing your wet locks behind your face. “But you know she’s not coming. She backed out because her company has a major presentation due this week, and I’m heading back tomorrow morning.”

“Oh, that’s too bad.” Geto Suguru shrugs, placing his surfboard against the wall before pulling a lever that releases clean, fresh water over his entire body. You watch the rivers of water run from his hair and down his back, where bunches of muscles you can’t even name gathered together and made a path for the water to travel down past his waist and to his shorts. “Are you staying in the beach house?”

“Y-yeah,” you answer, eagerly trying to find something - anything - to get your mind off of the hunk in front of you, like the fact that your legs are getting tanner.

“Do you mind if I stay over for the night before I drive back to the mainland? I mean, it’s our parent’s beach house, but I don’t know if you want privacy or…”

“No, that’s cool!” you blurt, maybe a little too excitedly.

He turns to face you, smiling widely and making the shaka sign with his right hand. “Right on.”

_____________________________________________________________

The hot water from the shower soothes your aching muscles and you sigh, thankful the water hadn’t gone cold yet. You let Geto go before you as a sign of goodwill, hoping he wouldn’t take too long in the only bathroom you had available.

But when he came out in a towel and nothing else, you averted your eyes, praying to the higher powers that be in your head like a madwoman. It would be your fate that you were going to be stuck with him on your last night, but you quickly push those thoughts aside. Nothing would happen between the two of you. He was your friend’s brother-in-law.

You emerge from the shower and wrap a towel around your figure, padding into the master bedroom and digging through your suitcase for something suitable to wear.

And that’s when you hear it.

A pained groan.

Instantly, worry sets into your mind and you forget you’re in a towel. You follow the sound of the groan to the guest bedroom, and you peek into the room, hoping Geto wasn’t hurt.

He’s standing at the dresser, facing away from you with the towel at his feet. You realize he’s fully naked, his face screwed up in concentration with his eyes closed and his hand… his hand is… his hand is moving…

“Fuck, y/n…” he moans, and for a moment, you think you’re caught, but his eyes are still closed and you--

“Achoo!”

Your head bangs against the door, knocking it wide open, and Geto whips around, eyes wide; shocked, and slightly embarrassed at the sight of you in a towel. In his doorway. You stare at each other in silence, unsure of what to say to ease the tension in the room. You look down to his still erect cock and then back up at him, then you raise your chin slightly, arching a brow.

“Was I on my knees or were you fucking me?” you wonder, and Geto curses, charging up to you like a dog in heat. When he yanks you into the room and slams the door shut, you know you’re in for it, and you climb on the bed expectantly.

One hand goes to your face, holding it as he kisses you roughly, and the other yanks off the towel without hesitation. You don’t speak as he lays you across the bed and fondles your breasts, hoping that his mouth would find your sensitive nipples and stimulate you even further.

“Geto, holy shit,” you whine as his fingers reach between your legs and stroke your clit leisurely. His mouth finally drifts to your breasts and you arch your back slightly, pressing into his face with a sense of urgency. He slides one finger into you, his thumb still rubbing your most sensitive spot, and you groan low in your throat, urging him to do more.

He’s in no rush though, feasting on you like you were the main course and popping your nipples in and out of his mouth at will. The sensory overload is driving you insane, and you writhe beneath him, feeling the heady sensation of an orgasm building relentlessly.

“G-Geto, please…” When he hears your cries, he strokes your clit faster and inserts another finger, stretching you out easily. The orgasm crashes over you like a wave, and you convulse around his fingers violently, exhaling so loud that you can practically hear it echo throughout the beach house.

Before you can even come down fully, though, Suguru already has his cock ready to press into you. “Tell me you want this and I’ll give it to you,” he mutters, and you nod eagerly. “Use your words, ku`u lei,” he urges you, and you pant,

“Please, yes.”

The stretching that ensues is unlike anything you’ve ever felt before. Your mouth opens into an “o” at the feeling, not out of pain, but out of an overabundance of stimulation. Every vein, every pulse, every twitch… you can feel it tenfold. He thrusts into you slowly, lips coming down to yours and kissing you deeply as he moves within you carefully. But before long, your legs relax against the bed, and Suguru takes that as a sign that you want more. He presses your legs back with his hands and grips the backs of your knees before leaning onto them, pressing his entire length into you.

“You like that?” he breathes in your ear, and all you can do is mewl at the sounds of his breathing as he fucks you stupid. He hums and kisses your cheek, the sounds of slapping skin picking up again. “Fuck, this is some good shit.” You exhale and inhale rapidly, unsure if your lack of breath is because you’re overstimulated or if you’re just really into the way he’s got you pinned underneath him, but whatever it is… he’s got you down bad.

The bed is creaking angrily and your legs are shaking, but it seems neither of you cares. Neither of you wants it to end. But a shudder rips through you, and Geto feels it in the spasms of your cunt around his cock.

“Tighten up like that again and I might just--” He’s cut off by you doing it again, and he grunts, his strokes becoming sloppy and rushed, almost as if he’s about to cum. “Shit,” he groans, and you feel the twitching of his cock inside of you as your orgasm peaks, pushing you to the edge again. You both lose your minds in the beach house, moaning loud enough to startle the birds outside as you cum.

_____________________________________________________________

“I take it the three-day vacation was great,” Nissa mentions before shoving a bite of pie in her mouth, standing over your kitchen island. It had been a few weeks since you’d been on the island, but every single night you were reminded of the afternoon you spent on your back.

“Oh, it was fun,” you reply, trying not to let her see your face as you put the pie in the fridge. “I had a great time.”

“Did you go surfing with my brother-in-law?”

“Yeah, that was cool.” You conveniently leave out that he fucked your brains out twice and then cooked you breakfast before the shuttle took you off to the airport, hoping she wouldn’t prod any further.

“Oh, did I tell you he’s in town for the next two weeks?” You spin around, facing her with a confused look.

“Oh?” Nissa breaks into a grin, wiggling her eyebrows.

“And he asked if he could see you at some point…” The doorbell rings at that moment, and you inhale deeply, your face twisting into shock.

“No, Nissa. You didn’t.”

“Anyways, I have to go! Company business calls, you know.” Nissa sashays to the front door of your townhome, then puts her hand on the knob. “Oh, I wonder who it could be?” You try to stop her from opening it, but she gets it open regardless, and you see Geto Suguru standing in the doorway, eyes flicking between the two of you.

“Hey, Nissa. Didn’t know you’d be over here…” he rubs the back of his neck, his black hair tied up behind his head. “Hey, y/n.”

You tug at the edges of your shirt dress, trying to smooth your untamed curls back behind your face. “Hey, Geto.”

“I was just leaving. You’re cool with being left alone with Geto for a bit, right, y/n?” Nissa doesn’t wait for your answer before leaving the townhome, getting into her car, waving, and then driving off.

You turn back to Geto, who is grinning slyly.

“Put your shoes on and come on. I want to take you out for lunch.”

“Lunch?”

“I mean unless you want me to skip straight to the part where I’m eating you for dessert, which is fine.” Your stomach leaps at the sound of that, and you grab your shoes by the door and your keys.

“Where are you taking me?” you ask, and he watches you lock the door before whispering in your ear,

“To heaven and back, if you’ll let me.”

_____________________________________________________________

TAGLIST: @jotazinha @brownskinnedgirll @leanne-tamashi @amaris9 @vabybizzle @missbonekitty

(IF I MISSED YOU, PLEASE TELL ME/ FORGIVE ME)

#jujutsu kaisen getou #getou x reader #getou suguru #geto x reader #geto suguru #jjk geto #geto smut

[plethora-of-imagines]

Multitasking

AN: I’m not fully happy with this one. The idea was good, but its not really edited and I’m not too fond of the ending. But continuing to try and rewrite it isn’t getting me anywhere so I am going to post it for now. Maybe in the future I will come back and fix it.

Word Count: 1412

Warnings: smut/lemon, telepathy, cockwarming

Description: DW Kinktober Day 3; Prompt: Telepathy

You just wanted to have some attention, and the Master needs to finish his sums.

Tag List: @c-s-stars @queerconfusionthings @how-masterful @truthbehindthemysteries

Shifting uncomfortably on the Master’s lap you tried to distract yourself from the situation you had put yourself into. Unfortunately, there was no one to blame but yourself for your predicament. As much as you wanted to blame the Master, he hadn’t done anything wrong. He had told you when this started that he had work to do and there would be little attention paid to you. That really it would be a much better idea for you to just relax and entertain yourself somewhere else. Or to even go grab a book to read while you joined him if you really wanted to stay. You had been so certain that the appeal of you settled in his lap, warm and full of his cock would be enough to distract him from his work. It had yet to work. It had been ages already! It felt like he had been working on his sums for hours. How could he resist you ready to be fucked in his lap and continue to work with not even a little teasing? He hadn’t even bounced his leg or pressed a kiss to the side of your face.

Pouting you tried to enjoy the sensation of being so full and filled by the Master. Without him moving it was feeling more like agony. You were used to cockwarming but not for this long, not without him continuing to actively keep you aroused. You wanted nothing more that for him to move, even just to shift his weight. Anything would be a relief at this point. You wanted your thoughts and body to be filled with only him. Trying to be patient for so long was starting to take it’s toll on you. 

Yet you didn’t mutter a word of complaint. He had warned you that he was busy, it was your own fault for thinking you could change that. It had been your idea to beg him to let you cockwarm as he worked, hoping to derail his progress with a quick fuck. You had assumed he would give into temptation after half an hour at most. You had just wanted some attention, to be close to him. Clearly, your plan hadn’t quite worked out for you. So you tried to stay still, to behave. Because he was busy, and you didn’t want to disturb him when you had promised not to.

Almost as if he had been reading your mind, the Master shifted slightly so that his head could rest on your shoulder. Pressing a quick kiss to your throat before you feel an ache in your head. Like the very beginnings of a headache that you knew was coming on. Slowly the pain faded, leaving you with the strange sensation of your mind being cradled in warmth. Even after having experienced the sensations hundreds of times you were still not used to the Master being inside of your head.

"Hmmm someone's getting a bit impatient. You alright, love? Got somewhere to be?"

His teasing echoed in your mind, like your own thoughts but scattered. His mental laughter didn't help you to process his thoughts any easier. The laughter was quiet, almost as if he was trying to keep it from reaching your mind. The issue with that was that no matter how much he tried to shield his stream of consciousness away, your mind reached to pull him in with just as much force. 

“I can be patient,” you shot back at him mentally. Your own inner thoughts betrayed you with a soft admission, “or at least I’m trying.”

Fond amusement washed over you. How adorable it was that you were trying to play pretend when your body was now rocking side to side. Aiming to gain as much stimulation as you could from shifting your weight. 

Shaking your head you tried to get the Master’s thoughts out of your head. It was instinctual, your mind not wanting to accept that someone else’s thoughts were intruding upon where your own stream of consciousness should be reigning. It truth you wanted to know every thought the Master had, especially when they were about you. The moment you felt the semi-rough texture of the Master’s hands caressing your thighs you lost all semblance of thought. 

So close to where you needed to feel him, yet teasingly far away. You blissfully accepted every touch. Trembling when his fingers finally brushed over your clit. His cock twitching in pleasure simultaneously. Oh, sometimes you forgot that he could feel what you felt when he did this. Clearly, he knew that the build up had made for the most wonderful of pleasures when he finally relieved you of your anticipation. Again and again he repeated his teasing motions.

Stopping abruptly in his pattern right before he would brush over your clit he stole your full attention. 

“I have to get this work done. Be a good girl and be patient again?” He projected into your mind.

“Please,” you whispered into the silent room. 

You found your hand wrapped around the pen the Master had been using before his hands found their way to your waist. Slowly, you could feel the emptiness left as the Master lifted you off of his cock. Mind filled with your thoughts mourning the loss, until you rapidly found yourself filled again. Being yanked back down with a force that made you cry out in pleasure. This, this is what you had been patiently waiting for.

“I don’t know if you can really count what you were doing as patient. Love. Your thoughts had been screaming that you wanted attention. They made it even harder to concentrate than the feeling of your warm, tight cunt around my cock.”

You moaned wildly as his words entered your head, bringing with them echoes of memories of how he had struggled to keep him mind focused.

“Write down 62 for me would you, love.”

Startling you out of your mental haze you tried to focus on the mathematics the Master was now filling your thoughts with. Each lift and drop of your body as he made you ride his cock clearing your head again. You could barely understand the numbers, nervermind write them down. Yet somehow you managed.

“Next we need to solve for E equals,” interrupting his thought you reminded him that it was really him who was solving these impossible difficult mathematic computations. It was kind of him to mentally include you, but you both knew the truth was that you were his glorified secretary.

“And what a beautiful secretary you are, now where were we?”

“Solving for E=mc cubed, Master,” you mentally reminded him.

“Such a good girl, remembering your lesion on the extra temporal physics of the time vortex!”

Your mind seemed to heat up as if your brain itself was blushing. It wasn’t possible yet somehow that it what it felt like. Or maybe the sensation stemmed from the Master resting one of his hands against your very flushed cheeks. The heat he was feeling transferring into your own thoughts as a literal feeling of heat. 

You hands shook as overtime your arousal grew, building up until you felt ready to fall apart. It was a struggle to write down any of the numbers you could pick out of the Master’s head. How did he manage to do both solve mathematic equations and fuck you? You were getting distracted just trying to write down some numbers! You hated the fact that he could multitask so well.

A pleasure shot through you before the mental connection was broken. You could feel the Master’s release shooting into you. It felt heavenly, something you had grown to love more and more each time you felt it. It was then that you noticed. Your arousal hadn’t subsided at all, your little orgasm had been a reflection of the Master’s. Your body was still humming with need. You whined pathetically, it wasn’t fair. You could feel the Master’s cock softening inside of you.

“What happened to my patient good girl?”

“This is so rude, Master. I want to cum so bad and now I’ll have to wait, again.”

“Good things cum to those who wait.”

“Don’t pun at me,” you laughed, annoyed that you couldn’t manage to stay upset with him.

Besides you knew what you were getting into when you interrupted his sums. Honestly, as long as you got to spend time with him you were content.

#dwkinktober21 #kinktober 2021 #the master x reader #dhawan!master x reader #prompt: telepathy