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sunlitmcgee · 2 years

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Behind the Scenes/Scrapped Stuff for Heal What Has Been Hurt Chapter 84

Well hey hey howdy heyo my sweet and darling readers! Or people who just follow me and watch me scream about my AU. Got another behind the scenes/deleted scenes style post for you, one that goes into detail about the recent HWHBH chapter that focused on everyone’s favorite goat child(girl edition), as well as just general stuff I had in my brain while writing that I couldn’t talk about in end-notes due to my brain being mushy and me having an interview.

TWS for mentions of body horror and gore, as well as custody battle-esque family struggles(again no clue how to describe it but yeah that’s close) +themes of abuse/trauma.

To start, I wanna say that I did really want to show how much of a 13 year old girl HWHBH!Lani is. Because that’s important to me when it comes to any child character I write/depict. It’s important to me that c!Benchtrio, c!Eryn, c!Purpled and every other child in the DSMP lore is shown as a child. As someone smaller, young, weak and very much helpless and very much at the mercy of the oftentimes cruel and abusive adults that rule over their lives.

HWHBH!Lani is a little 13 year old girl that was injured in an airship crash as a baby and who was separated from her family for 13 years until Jordan got tipped off by God and managed to finally find her.

She likes books.

She likes reading.

She loves to learn new things and figure out how the world works, whether it be through scientific journals and written histories, or through analyzing her favorite stories to dissect their themes and apply them to her general world view.

She’s shy and soft spoken but confident with people she’s close to.

She’s very mature but still so very very young.

She’s barely 4 feet tall next to her 7+ feet himbo of a dad. Yes HWHBH!Jordan is a himbo. So is HWHBH!Tubbo. Like father like son. Lani got the brains from her mama.

She’s a very sweet, very adorable little child. I love her so much and have be brain rotting over her and Jordan for a very long while. I deeply want to give them both a few spin-off chapters that focus on Lani’s school life as well as Jordan getting some therapy. But that is for another day.

The point is is that I need you all as readers to remember that these characters are all children. They’re kids. Sweet, small, vulnerable kids that have been used as pawns in politics and wars, as punching bags for sick monsters’ pleasures, as tools for selfish destruction and petty childish vengeance, and as scapegoats for the adults around them to put all the blame onto so that they could save their own skins and not have to accept fault for the evil shit they’ve done.

HWHBH!Tommy is 16. HWHBH!Beeduo are 17. HWHBH!Purpled is about 16 and a half. HWHBH!Eryn is around 19 while HWHBH!Beauty is around the same. HWHBH!Lani is 13.

They’re all so young. They’re all just kids.

Poor little Enderboo burns his feet when he runs through the snow.

Tubbo thought he was back in the firework box when his wings were coming in.

Tommy still gets nervous about his discs and worries someone will steal them.

Eryn barely understands why there’s a crater where their old home used to be.

Purpled plays with a cassette player he won at a drunk god’s gameshow.

Beauty teases her friend for wearing red all the time.

Lani follows Dracula Daily and has a cane that looks like Boo’s door from Monster’s Inc.

They’re all kids. Just kids. Good...good little kids.

They are kids, and I will write them as kids. As children. As smaller people who are weaker than the adults and who shouldn’t have to deal with whatever drama the adults have going on.

I got a few comments on that survey that say I “baby” and “woobify” these characters too much. I really don’t care if that’s what some readers think. These characters are children, and I will write them as such.

That’s what this chapter was supposed to be. A reminder that these characters are kids, and that as kids they will never be exposed to the issues the adults in their lives have to deal with, and will instead be left to live in relative ease and comfort as they should’ve always been allowed to be.

Adults can deal with the adult issues.

And the kids can just vibe.

This going to be a major theme going forward when it comes to XD

Now, onto some deleted scenes, yes?

Many scenes in this chapter were shortened down much like with chapter. I did this to save on time/pacing, as well as to add to the rather hectic flow that was there when Tubbo’s wings came in.

Originally I wanted to drag that out much much more.

There was going to be some vivid descriptions of how his veins snapped in some places so that the skin could come undone and his wings could push themselves free. I considered having it be interlaced with bits of Lani’s book exert thoughts that were lifted from some dragon hybrid anatomy books that her dad probably gave.

Decided that the rushed horror feel suited it better. Poor thing watched her goober of a brother get his wings and freak out because the pain triggered several trauma responses. Very upsetting, but dw. She’s gonna get into therapy.

Papa Puffy heals all wounds~

On top of that I had ideas for some more scenes about Snowchester. Things about the general environment, the different citizens, the various little shops/craftsmen stores where people go in to get things repaired. I wanted some stuff about Jack and how Tubbo’s considering letting him move back in. I wanted some more stuff about the lab and the tests Tubbo runs when it comes to engineering new kinds of fertilizer for the crops, as well as farm equipment and stuff that is generally more safe/productive than mass nuke production.

I really liked the idea of a scene where Tommy rides on Henry past the town’s school house and gets chased by a bunch of little itty children.

I still wanna use that last one. But alas, this was a Lani-centric chapter, so I felt all that would draw the attention away from her and her new life with her dad in Snowchester that’s meant to allow them to be closer to Tubbo so they can at least be CLOSE to a “proper” little family.

One other thing is that I planned on Tubbo turning into a full-on dragon form.

It was going to be triggered either by the pain from his wings or a bright flash that’d trigger his firework trauma.

I have a very vivid imagine in my head of a scene where Lani goes outside to find her dad, walks over near the water to look at the moonlit sea, looks up at the sky, and sees jordan and tubbo flying around while Tubbo screams and jordan tries to catch him.

The mental imagine of a massive claw composed entirely of starlight simply....manifesting itself,,,,,out of the sky, and grabbing them both is something I REALLY want to find a way to use.

But for now, I think I’ll leave it all there. This chapter was a very fun one to write. I deeply enjoy getting to step outside of the main cast’s POVs from time to time to get into the heads of other DSMP/DSMP-adjacent characters. It’s fun. Let’s me explore stuff we’d otherwise rarely get to see.

Next chapter is going to be one you’ve all waited for for quite a while. I fear some of you have expectations for how it’ll turn out and may be a bit disappointed at how it ends. But we’ll see, I do suppose.

Thank you for reading this! Feel free to reblog to add your thoughts or ask questions! Have a goob gay!!

#HWHBH #behind the scenes stuff #writing stuff #hwhbh!lani #hwhbh!jordan #hwhbh!tubbo #hwhbh!ranboo #hwhbh!XD #hwhbh!tommy #hwhbh!eryn #hwhbh!purpled #hwhbh!beauty #tw body horror #tw gore

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lets-groove-tonight · 2 years

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my first proper drawing of Tony Crynight's version of Springtrap in ~4 years! I was rewatching the series and MAN the brainrot hits hard /pos

I opened a new box of pencil crayons for this gdi /lh

( @tonycrynight hi hello I hope it's ok for me to tag you! love your work dude! :] )

#tony crynight #tony crynight springtrap #fnaf art #five nights at freddy's by tony crynight #i remember watching this as a 13 year old and being like 'hey that evil rabbit is kinda cool'#fuck yeah he is #THIS is what i mean when i say springtrap is my fav #not nasty peepaw afton /lh

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plan-d-to-i · 2 years

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Plan tell me what the books says about relationship between Wei Ying and Nie Huisang? Because I’ve been reading a lot of fanfiction lately and now I just can’t remember how it looked in canon

Answered here & here.

Nie Huaisang and Wei Wuxian got along quite well in the Cloud Recesses. Nie Huaisang was impressed and intrigued by Wei Wuxian's ideas re : cultivating w resentful energy. Unlike jiang cheng he does not constantly put him down. It's interesting to see the difference in dynamic especially in the moments were it's closely contrasted w jc's behavior:

Nie Huaisang thought for a while. “Actually, I thought what you said was very interesting,” he said, not entirely able to hide his envy and yearning. “To get spiritual energy you have to cultivate it yourself, and you can only form a golden core with a lot of hard work. It takes years for people who were born without talent, like me. It’s like I’m missing something because a dog bit me when I was in the womb. But all resentful energy comes from fierce ghosts and demons and so on, so as long as you can take it, you can use it. How amazing that would be.” …

Wei Wuxian laughed. “Right? Not using it is a waste.”

“Enough,” Jiang Cheng warned. “Whatever nonsense you spout, you better not head down that sort of dark road.” (Chapter 13)

(jc also dismisses WWX's ideas for the compass of evil and the lure flags...)

Changing the topic, he said, “If only there was something like fishing bait that could draw the water ghosts in. Or, something that could point in the direction they’re hiding, like a compass, that sort of thing.”

“Lower your head and watch the water,” Jiang Cheng said. “You’re letting your fantasies run wild again. Concentrate on looking for water ghosts like you’re supposed to.”

“Hey, mounting swords and flying was also only a fantasy once!” Wei Wuxian said.

Here NHS comes to tell WWX the good news that he probably won’t get punished meanwhile jc is hoping otherwise:

To prevent fuddy-duddies Lan the Elder and Lan the Younger from dragging him out of bed in the middle of the night to rain punishment upon him, Wei Wuxian clung to his sword the entire time he slept. However, the water was quiet and the air was still, and when the next day arrived, Nie Huaisang came to look for him, overjoyed at unexpected good news. “Brother Wei, luck is really on your side. Last night, the old man left for Qinghe to attend the Discussion Conference my clan is hosting. We don’t have to listen to lectures for the next few days!”

Without the old one, only the young one remained. This would be easy to deal with! Wei Wuxian rolled off the bed and laughed while putting on his boots. “Heaven’s charmed clouds are blessing me with shade.”

Jiang Cheng was beside him polishing his sword with loving care when he decided to spill cold water over Wei Wuxian’s head. “Just wait until he gets back. You can’t escape punishment.”

Keeping in mind that Wei Wuxian was perpetually punished and singled out for punishment in Lotus Pier this hits some type of way... NHS also asks for medicine for WWX while jc is just thinking of himself... as usual:

Jiang Cheng couldn’t have felt more awkward and had no idea how to answer, so Nie Huaisang beat him to it. “Brother Xichen, Brother Wei was punished by being hit over 100 times with the discipline ruler. Is there any medicine that could help him?”

...

Jiang Cheng was too embarrassed to talk about what Wei Wuxian had been up to. After all, all of them had egged him on to go and buy alcohol, and they all deserved to be punished as well. He could only speak vaguely. “It’s nothing. It’s nothing. It’s not that bad! He can walk. Wei Wuxian, why haven’t you gotten off yet?”

Ultimately though NHS and WWX don't have that many interactions throughout the book. The friendship aspect of their relationship was beefed up by cql/fanon. NHS didn't bring back WWX because he missed his bff, he brought WWX back because he realized WWX was the only one specialized enough in resentful energy to be able to manage NMJ''s resentful arm and solve the mystery.

He tried to search for his elder brother’s corpse, but after so many years and so much hard work, he could only find a single left hand. He was stuck at this step, without anything that could lead to the next. In addition, the left hand was abnormally fierce, too difficult to suppress. If it was left by his side, it’d keep on resulting in bloodshed. So he remembered someone. Someone who was best at dealing with these things, these problems.

The YiLing Patriarch.

But the YiLing Patriarch had been torn into pieces already. What should he do now? And so he remembered someone else. Mo XuanYu, who’d been kicked out of Koi Tower.

Perhaps to gain information from Mo XuanYu, Nie HuaiSang talked to him once. From Mo XuanYu’s grievances, he knew that Mo XuanYu had once read the fragmented manuscript that recorded an ancient, forbidden technique in Jin GuangYao’s collection. He then urged Mo XuanYu, who had had enough of the humiliation coming from his own clan members, to seek revenge using the forbidden technique of body sacrifice.

And which fierce ghost was summoned?

It was the YiLing Patriarch again, of course.

Mo XuanYu, no longer able to put up with his circumstances, finally painted the blood array, and Nie HuaiSang also used the opportunity to release the hot potato he was no longer able to keep: ChiFeng-Zun’s left hand.

From then on, the plan successfully began. He no longer needed to exert his energy on searching for the remaining limbs of Nie MingJue, instead leaving all of the dangerous and bothersome things to Wei WuXian and Lan WangJi.

These of course are all WWX's thoughts, so we don't know exactly what went through NHS's mind- as WWX himself caveats but probably close enough.

Wei WuXian stared at him for a while before finally averting his gaze. Conjectures were conjectures, after all. Nobody had evidence.

translation

In the end though, regardless of his relationship w WWX or of his motivation NHS is the one who made WangXian possible again.

#mdzs #answers #Nie Huaisang #Wei Wuxian #jiang cheng

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kpop-sports-books-series-fangirl · 3 years

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I’m sorry (Hunger Games)

Masterlist

Request form and prompt list

(Y/N) - Your name

Plot - (Y/N) was captured by the capitol and somehow manages to escape, but their former best friend, Finnick, and the Mockingjay are mad at them because they couldn’t save Peeta and Annie. (Y/N) volunteers to go on the mission to save Peeta, Annie, and Johanna from the capitol.

Warning - Super angsty, mentions of blood, torture, violence and gun shots

“...So, any volunteers?” President Coin asks everyone around the table. Gale Hawthorne is the first to raise his hand. “I’ll go,” he says.

The gloomy atmosphere of the room shifts to one of caution when I speak for the first time in two weeks. “I’ll go too,”

I can’t bear any more of the cold looks of my former best friend. And the glares from the Mockingjay. Was it really my fault that I managed to escape from the capitol? I saw my chance and took it. Being tortured for months was not a good experience and I got out as soon as I could.

I thought my ex-best friend would be happy to see me, but the only thing I see when I look in his eyes is pure hatred for me, pure hatred at the fact that I couldn’t save the love of his life, Annie. Not me, Annie.

Everyone looks at me, shocked at the fact that I’d volunteered to go back to the place that I was imprisoned and tortured. Everyone but Finnick. I looked at him. He avoided my gaze. Surprise.

Sighing, I exited the room, not even waiting for the meeting to be finished. I head back to my room, and look through my things once again, in case I won’t make it back.

I take out the box of my belongings from my district. I picked up the fishing hook that my father gave me the day before he was killed by Snow. I clutched it in my hand and continued looking through the box. The next thing was a necklace, my older sister’s necklace.

I tied it around my neck and observed it through the mirror my mother had bought for my 15th birthday. The last thing that lay in the box was a picture. The picture of me and Finnick back when we were kids.

I had just jumped on Finnick’s back and he ran around like crazy. My sister had taken a picture with her brand new camera which was gifted to her by our parents for her 13th birthday. She lost the camera and I remember looking for it for days and when it didn’t turn up, she cried a lot, feeling like she had betrayed our parents by losing the camera.

One evening, I couldn’t bear to see my sister crying anymore, so I had stomped over to Finnick’s house, dragged him out and made him help me search for it. We had decided to split up and cover more ground, but I got lost.

I tried finding my way back, but I couldn't, eventually, the sun started setting and I found a huge oak tree under which I took shade. My stomach grumbled out of hunger, and me being the 7-year-old I was, had started crying and drifted off into an uncomfortable slumber.

A few hours later, I was shaken awake by Finnick. “Hey, (Y/N), wake up,” He then noticed the tear stains on my face and pulled me into a hug. “Why were you crying?” He asked me. “I got lost, and I was so alone and I got scared,” I admitted to him.

He pulled out of the hug, keeping his hands on my shoulders, and said, “I’m sorry. I won’t ever let you get lost again. If you somehow do still manage to get lost, come to this tree, okay? And I will find you, I promise,”

“Promise?” I asked again. “I promise to always be there for you no matter what!” He says and goes to hold my hand. “I promise to always hold this hand,”

I smiled at him, and he led the way home.

He broke the promise. He broke the promise when he let me be taken by the capitol. Blinking the tears away, I set everything back in the box.

I felt a sudden urge to throw up and ran to the bathroom in my room and coughed out blood. This had been happening for a while now. I thought it was because of the torture that was inflicted upon me, but now, I’m not too sure.

I wash myself up and go to sit on my bed, trying to calm down.

I hear a knock on my door, and I stand up and open the door a crack so no one could even look in. It was Gale.

“We’re leaving tomorrow morning, and we’re meeting for the briefing in an hour,” He said. I simply nodded and shut the door on his face.

☽˚･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* ♡ *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧ ｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆☽

We all are geared up and waiting for everyone in the airborne division. We board the hovercraft and take off.

Everyone looks anxious. The hovercraft feels a little more crowded than I like with 7 people aboard. The red lights flashing doesn’t help the nervous energy in the air... Some people are reviewing the plans with each other and I see Gale looking over at me.

I look away and close my eyes, trying to prepare my mind for what I’m about to witness again.

Once we reached there, we entered through a secret passageway that we were informed about through our earpiece. We took out the two guards who were standing guard to the prison area.

One of the people took out a gadget and started to press some buttons, but I wasn’t concentrating, just trying to get myself mentally ready.

The doors opened with a loud hiss, revealing the huge chamber with cells. Everything was white, reminding me of the times when I was trapped in here with nothing else to look at.

All the memories of the place came rushing back.

I was sitting on the floor, clutching my head in an attempt to stop the immense pain traveling through my veins. I hear evil laughter and when I look up, I see Snow. “So, are you ready to speak now?” He asked. “Never!” I spat at him. “Increase it to the highest level,” he said to no one, but I knew that there were people watching and listening from the CCTV cameras, and immediately, the pain intensified by 20 times. I screamed so loud, the whole of Panem probably heard me. When the pain finally died down a bit, my throat was sore by how much I had screamed.

I was snapped back into reality when Gale snapped his fingers in front of me. I noticed that the alarm was triggered and red lights were blaring. I noticed that we have Peeta, Annie, and Johanna with us now and we were heading back to the hovercraft.

I stayed at the back of the group in case a peacekeeper came to attack and followed the rest out through a different passage.

Suddenly, I heard a few shouts “This way! They’re here,” followed by some gunshots. Everyone in front of me was running now, we turned right and hid behind the wall.

I spun around, signaling the others to continue going, and shot at the peacekeepers. They were shooting back of course, but I had a much better aim. I felt pressure in my abdomen and I shot down the last person.

I looked down to see I had been shot, but I covered it with my t-shirt and turned to follow the others.

I managed to jog back to the hovercraft without fainting, although the loss of blood was making me lightheaded. They were trying to get Peeta to trust them and board the hovercraft but he wouldn’t budge.

I couldn’t stand anymore and I collapsed on a seat in the hovercraft. I put my hand on the wound and pressed down on it, hoping to slow the blood flow.

“(Y/N), would you come and help-! What happened!?” I heard someone say in the distance, but I couldn’t make out who it was. I kept drifting in and out of consciousness.

It felt like hours till we made it back to district 13 and I was rushed to an emergency room. They didn’t have any sedatives on hand so they had to take out the bullet with me awake.

The pain was building up now that the adrenaline rush was gone. I couldn’t remember much that happened, just that fact that I was blinded from the pain, I had clenched my fists, trying to somehow grab something, and I heard beeps around me before I completely went out of consciousness.

Once I woke up, the doctors told me that it had been almost a week since the mission. When I had asked them if someone came to visit, they said no. I thought Finnick would come. I thought we were best friends. I thought-

I don’t know why I thought that anymore. If me taking a bullet for his love isn’t enough, I don’t know what else I can do for him. I might as well give up.

No one cares about me. I turned my head so that the doctor couldn’t see the tears threatening to spill from my eyes. I looked down at my hand, the same one Finnick always promised to hold. If he really was my best friend, he would have been there when they were removing the bullet, holding my hand, but he was probably celebrating with Annie.

No one needs me. After my family was killed, no one loved me. No one cared about me and no one needed me.

“We need to run a few more tests on you today, then you can rest,” The doctor told me. I nodded okay. “Doctor, how many days will I have to stay here for?” I asked him.

“You have very bad injuries and it might take more than a month to heal. If the test results are showing that you have another illness, then, we can’t tell until we figure out what you are diagnosed with,”

By the end of the day, I was exhausted and all of the test results had come back. I was resting in my bed, waiting for the doctor to come back, and he came in wearing a regretful expression.

“What happened?” I asked him. “Your results show that you have lung cancer,” “Can you treat it?” I ask even though I don’t know if I want to live anymore.

“We don’t have the resources to treat a Stage 1 cancer here, and you have Stage 4 cancer,” he broke the news.

I took a moment to soak it in before I asked, “How long do I have to live?”

“You should have had 1 month, but because of the bullet, your condition worsened and you just have two weeks left, I’m sorry,” he said and he left the room.

I have two weeks left. Two weeks of my life. I didn’t have anyone to say goodbye to anyways.

After a few days of moping in the hospital room, I find out that Annie and Finnick are going to get married.

On the day of the wedding, I still couldn't get out of the wheelchair, so one of the doctors took me to the wedding.

It was an okay wedding, mostly because it wasn’t me up there, beside’s Finnick. I was sitting at the back of the hall, so no one could see me, I didn’t mind though, I could just watch everything in peace.

Annie and Finnick kiss. They’re married. At least Finnick is happy now, I can see that smile on his face that I couldn’t put there.

A fit of coughs hit me, but the music is too loud and no one cares enough to take a look at me. I start coughing so hard that I’m thrown out of the wheelchair and I can see blood slowly pooling on the floor. A minute later, I collapse, still coughing. Until my eyes close.

Finnick P.O.V

It’s been two days since Annie and I got married, and I’m sitting on the edge of my bed, clutching onto the letter, trying not to cry.

I was just told that (Y/N) died during the wedding due to lung cancer. they left me a note. It said:

Hey Finnick!

I know by the time you read this I’ll be gone. Hopefully to heaven, but with all I’ve done, I wouldn’t be surprised if I go downstairs. Anyways enough about me. I was very angry with you for breaking your promise, but I figured, what good is it to die angry? Might as well live a happy two weeks of life I have left.

I want to get a weight off of my shoulders. I’m sorry I didn’t save Annie when I came back. I should have tried harder. I’m sorry.

I know you won’t miss me when I’m gone, but I’ll miss you. Your friendship. You were there for me through a lot of my hard times, so I want to say thank you.

Thank you for finding me when I got lost. Thank you for defending me against those bullies back in school. Thank you for the happiest times of my life. Thank you for being the reason my smile became just a tiny bit bigger. Thank you for being the reason my heart opened up more. Thank you for making me a better person. Thank you for being the reason to light up my life, even though I wasn’t yours.

Thank you Finnick, thank you.

I just want to say one last thing to you.

I love you.

I always have, even though you never loved me back.

Live a happy life with Annie.

Don’t you dare cry for me.

(Y/N)

I couldn’t stop the tears from flowing anymore. I was the reason for their anger in the last few days of their life. Only if I hadn’t hated them when they came back from the capitol and been thankful, maybe they wouldn’t have gone.

I didn’t even get to apologize to them. The last thing I said to them was “How could you not have gotten Annie back?!”

And they loved me? If only I had known before I met Annie because I was in love with them too.

A/N: I know the timeline is completely messed up, but I couldn't understand the exact timeline in the book, so I went with what felt right. Hope you enjoy it! :)

-TheBlueBookworm is out~!!!

#hunger games #finnick odair #finnick x reader #finnick x annie #finnick angst #gale hawthorne

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nightshade-minho · 3 years

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MOONSTORM [ iii ]

You know that feeling when you know you’ve made a terrible mistake?

Yes. That feeling.

It’s a feeling that never really goes away. You had to learn that the hard way.

Irrevocable actions, stupid mistakes. You were heart-wrenchingly familiar with all of it.

To err was human apparently. You...weren’t human, though.

It seems like being superhuman was insignificant, after all. At the end of the day, nothing mattered. None of your powers did.

Despite it all, you still lost him.

warnings: depressing shit (it gets better though dw) mentions of death, violence, sexual content, future smut

wc: 2.8k

moonstorm masterlist

It felt like the world had lost all color.

It had happened so many months ago, and yet it still felt like it happened just yesterday. The memories of stumbling out of his lair, covered in his blood and your tears, still fresh in your mind.

The image of his face, betrayed and yet so calm as he uttered those last words to you...it haunted you constantly.

You found yourself looking at the moon every night, dreaming about what could have been. The nightmares endlessly plagued your sleep as well, causing you to fear even your own bed.

No...even after Hyunjin's effects on you wore off, your own brain took on the responsibility of torturing you by conjuring up more heartbreaking dreams. Dreams which made you long for something you knew you’d lost forever- never to be yours again.

You never truly realized how much you’d gotten used to having him around. Life was so glaringly empty and meaningless without him. It was a complicated relationship…and yet it still left a giant hole in you. An all-encompassing despair that threatened to swallow you up.

With him gone, it just didn’t feel right to be a superhero anymore. How could you be the strong role model for everyone in the city to rely on when you knew just how weak you’d become? Even when the newspapers were covered with your heroics, even as the mayor addressed the city and expressed his desire to give you a medal for stopping yet another supervillain from roaming the streets- you stubbornly refused to don that costume ever again.

You stayed hidden through it all. You just couldn’t bring yourself to go out in public anymore. Your vigilante costume lay forgotten in the back of your closet- crumpled and sad.

It just...felt wrong. At the moment you felt nothing but pathetic. You didn’t have time to waste saving a snotty kitten stuck on a tree or stop a petty criminal from robbing a bank- all you were fit to do was eat ice cream straight from the can, and watch a soulless movie. The same routine, day in and day out. You hadn’t left your apartment in nearly a month, not even to buy groceries. Every second was spent wrapped up in blankets, pondering what you’d done.

Was that selfish of you? Probably. You were discovering new flaws by the second.

Sighing, you sat up a little, your ass almost numb from how long you’d spent lying down. Glancing up, you saw your father’s portrait looking down at you. You swallowed and slowly stood up from your bed, groaning to yourself. Why did he suddenly seem so disappointed?

Maybe a little bit of fresh air is what you needed, considering you were starting to believe the paintings were changing expressions. After all, you had work to do anyway- might as well take advantage of the nearby café’s free WiFi.

***

Here at last.

You sat down in the corner of the café, so tired you could barely move a muscle. But you had to get a move on with your life- the recovery should have happened by now.

And yet here you were, months later. Nothing seemed to be able to fill the hole he left behind, and even now you wished you could go back home as soon as possible.

Had it...had it been a mistake?

Of course it had. Your misery was evidence, and you weren’t sure how much longer you could convince yourself that you’d done it for the good of the city.

The truth was... Hwang Hyunjin scared you.

He made you feel things, made you want to be someone else entirely. Every ounce of rigidity and austerity you’d imposed in yourself disappeared every time you were with him. He made you want to give everything up- give up all the responsibilities and burdens you carried on your shoulders to be with him. To be like him- free.

It wasn’t Hyunjin who was a threat to the city. No, not directly.

It was you- or rather the lack of you.

This city needed you to survive, and if Hyunjin managed to change you...it surely wouldn’t have lasted long without your help. Hyunjin had never really been the city’s biggest threat- there were far worse villains and it was them who you really fought against.

He was more of just an inconvenience, someone you had to deal with from time to time. And then he’d struck that deal- after which the nature of your relationship had turned into something entirely different.

Every time he acted up, it was usually just a ploy to get your attention. And attention was exactly what he got. You’d reinforced his behavior like an idiot.

You told yourself it was a chore, but it wasn’t all that convincing. You’d loved spending those nights in his bed, loved the way he was an expert at making you come undone with his body and his words.

It really had seemed like a good idea at the time. The right thing to do. However, it was quickly starting to seem like anything but.

You sighed as your mind tried its best not to travel back all those months. Dipping a teabag into the liquid, you mindlessly observed the customers in the cafe. Many of them were young, teenagers who were heading out before class.

You sighed as you recalled your own high school days, the times Hyunjin and you had hung out in a cafe much like this one.

“You don’t have to help me with this project, you know.”

“Ah, shush. It’s our final year. I’m not going to leave you alone.” He smiled as he flipped through his books, taking a sip of his coffee occasionally.

“You act like you’re not sticking to me like white on rice the rest of the year.” You roll your eyes, chuckling to yourself.

“Don’t get snippy with me, missy.” He smirked, still thumbing the pages nonchalantly. “Or I’ll have to punish you.”

“You- I- what?” You wouldn’t admit it, but the thought caused a fluttering sensation in more than one place. It was a little bit of a shock, considering the two of you had done nothing more than make out and flirt, until now.

“Chill. I’m kidding.” He shook his head, looking up at you. “Unless…” He wiggled his eyebrows.

“Stop it! I’m supposed to be working right now.” You whined, swatting him with a rolled up paper.

“I don’t care.” He tapped his fingers on the table. “Hm...do you know what I’m thinking of right now, Y/n?”

“W-what?”

“Thinking about how easy it would be to slip my fingers under your skirt and play with that pretty pussy of yours. I’m pretty sure it’s soaked your underwear through by now.”

Fuck.

Your cheeks flushed as you stared at your plate. You couldn’t find it in yourself to respond properly- his mere words had already turned you to a mess.

“S-shut up.” You mumbled, reading out formulas aloud as you tried to divert your attention from it. Hyunjin let out a teasing chuckle at your lame attempt to change the topic, shaking his head as he stared at his book again, unaware you were looking over your own at him, pressing your thighs together subtly.

God, he was so...so annoying.

You snapped out of it, sighing as you looked around at the much less crowded cafe. Had it always looked so dull? So lifeless?

The thought of him was hurtful- it felt like a dull knife, screwing itself into you. Reminding you what you’d done.

You’d killed the love of your life.

And now? There was no way to bring him back.

***

“Murder is never something a superhero should resort to. A good hero always stays true to themselves- they only kill if it’s absolutely necessary.”

A cough.

“But of course...villains are exempt from that rule. Killing one villain’s life could save countless others.”

Hm. You weren’t exactly sure if your father was right. Although you were just a child, you still had some knowledge of morality.

Was he? Killing just...seemed wrong. You didn’t know if you could bring yourself to do it, no matter how evil the person was.

“Surely there are other ways to neutralize someone evil, Father?”

He narrowed his eyes at you, before shaking his head coldly. “Untrue.”

“The truth is, some lives are expendable, my dear Y/n…” Another cough, before he cleared his throat and fixed his gaze back on you.

“You must always look for the greater good.”

***

You still remembered the day you first met Hyunjin.

He was 13, and you were just a little younger. Your families were good comrades and allies, so your eventual meeting had already been planned.

The two of you were in the living room with everyone else as they talked to each other, mingling and chattering like adults usually did. Hyunjin and you made an unanimous decision to sneak out to the rooftop, and get to know each other better.

“So...our parents are allies now, hm? This means we’re going to see each other a lot more.”

“Of course we are! We’re both prodigies, like my dad and your mom...we inherited their powers, so they’re obviously going to want to cultivate those.”

“You speak pretty fancy for a 12 year old.”

“Hey, so do you! Besides, we’re gifted, aren’t we?”

“Hm.” He sighed, swinging his legs and inhaling. After a few seconds of silence, he spoke up again.

“Do you actually like having these powers?”

“Oh? Well, yeah...I do...my father tells me stories of his days as a superhero. I want to help people, just like him.”

He shrugged. “I don’t know. I’d much rather live a normal life. Get a normal job, find someone to love, and have a normal marriage in a normal town.”

You pressed your lips together. “To each their own, I guess. Personally, I just want to get rid of all the evil in the world and make my father proud.”

“Really?”

“Yep.”

“Evil…” He tapped his chin. “How does one even know the difference between good and evil?”

You raised an eyebrow. “What do you mean? I’m pretty sure it would be obvious in every situation.”

“I disagree. The distinction is blurry. No one knows for sure, and definitely not at first glance.” He sighed. “I would know.”

You brought your knees to your chest as you observed the city below. “Well, I guess you’re right…” you paused, your heart feeling a little heavy for some reason.

“Do you know?”

“The line between good and evil is thin, Y/n. I can’t say I know for sure. But do you know what will always help you remember?”

“What?”

“Your heart.” He said softly, glancing at you and offering you a small smile.

“Just do whatever feels right...trust yourself.”

***

You sighed and shut your laptop.

Home. You needed to go home, cause your heart ached too much. You definitely weren’t ready to go back to work yet. You hadn’t done anything productive today really, just drink coffee and reflect on your actions. Regretting....regretting it all.

It’d been wrong. The wrong choice, the wrong decision.

You knew that, now. There could have been another way. You shouldn’t have rushed into it like that...how could you?

You felt a surge of hatred towards yourself engulf you. It was all your fault, this pain you were feeling. You didn’t have anyone to direct this immense anger towards except yourself. You realized this little fact in horror, your heart clenching as you wished things could have been different.

Finishing off your coffee, you placed a few bills on the table as you left the café, heading home. Ready to burrow under the blankets again, wallow in your self pity and pain. There wasn’t much else to do except succumb to acceptance.

You made your way down the street, humming the saddest song you knew under your breath.

All of a sudden, you felt eyes burning into your back. Your own eyes widening slightly, you turned around quickly-

But there was no one there.

Weird. Sighing, you decided to go back to going over your plans for tonight in your mind.

Maybe watch a movie in hopes of triggering some sort of emotion in you...or maybe take a bath, light some candles and listen to depressing music- shit.

It happened again. Someone was following you- you could feel it. Uncomfortable, your breathing slowly started getting heavier as you tried to formulate some kind of plan in your head-

The next thing that happened was so sudden you barely registered it for a second.

Your hand was gripped, so tightly you felt it would bruise. Aggressive, shocking and swift as lightning- it took several seconds before you realized someone was trying to kidnap you.

“Stop! Leave me alone!”

Struggling against the person holding you, you caught a glimpse of the masked man and decided to scream, hoping to gain some attention from somebody, anybody. There was no way this was happening, not right now. Your day had already been bad enough, why was the universe so intent on rubbing salt in your wounds?!

The urge to fight had never been stronger. Yet there was no strength left in your body. You couldn’t fight back against this man- he was taller than you and somehow even matched you in strength. Unless you exposed your powers, there was no way you would get yourself out of this predicament. Somehow you managed to smack him with your arm weakly, making him hiss.

“Let me go, please!”

The coffee cup fell out of your hand, brown liquid spilling all over the ground as you were pulled into the dark alley so quickly, no one would notice. Your eyes darted about in panic, trying to work out a possible escape route when the masked man caged you in, his arms on either side of you.

A horrible sense of déjà vu enveloped you. It’s all you can do to not scream, trying to keep yourself calm so that you could escape.

It’s ok, breathe in...and concentrate.

The heat within you started to crackle, your palms beginning to burn up gradually.

Your eyes blinked as you decided to try and take a good look at the person holding you. Their head was covered with a black mask, their finger held over their mouth as they ran their eyes over your distressed expression.

Inhale. Exhale.

“What the fuck are you doing?” You hissed, staying still and pretending to give up the struggle. “Unhand me now, or you’ll regret it, trust me-“

“Shh! Y/n, please…” He shushed you, his voice shaky.

You stopped in your tracks.

Huh?

That voice…

“I’ll explain... but first we need to get out of here, fuck-” He looked from side to side quickly, scanning his surroundings.

Shit. Why does that voice sound so familiar?

“Who- who are you?!” You managed to get out, the heat fading away as deep, panicked confusion took over you instead.

There was a small sigh as your assailant stood up a little straighter, groaning. And then, his fingers deftly pulled the mask off, clutching it in his hands tightly.

Golden locks spilled out, a handsome visage coming into view. Plump lips and beautiful eyes, looking oh so familiar.

No.

It couldn’t be. This wasn’t happening. What the fuck, what the fuck, what the actual fuck was going on?

It’s him.

But it can’t be.

How? It’s not possible-

You’re definitely losing your mind.

The man’s breathing got quicker as he watched your expression morph from fear into one of pure, electric shock.

“I know you’re shocked, Y/n, but please listen to-“

Your chest started heaving, quickly rising and falling as your heart pounded against your rib cage.

This...could not be happening. What was this? Was this a nightmare? Yet another sick, twisted dream? He couldn’t be standing right in front of you...it was impossible. No. No no no no no no no.

It was all too overwhelming, and your brain and body seemed to agree on that. Your mind swam, your thoughts all over the place as you felt yourself sway on your feet.

“This- I-“ You stumbled over your words, tears slipping past quickly as you tried to form words to express what you felt.

Pain. Searing pain, taking over, spreading from head to toe.

Your breathing slowed as the world suddenly went black, Hyunjin’s shouts in the background fading away...until there was nothing but silence.

Pure, unadulterated silence.

#hyunjin smut #hyunjin angst #skz smut #skz angst #hwang hyunjin smut #stray kids smut #stray kids angst #hyunjin x reader #hyunjin scenarios #hyunjin imagines

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imonthinice · 3 years

Text

The Criminal Psychology Majors, Jason Todd x Fem!Reader Part 19/?

Word Count: 4.1k

Author’s Note:

Warnings: Mentions of the court system, fighting, swearing, no beta bitch we die like Jason Todd

Part 1) (Part 2) (Part 3) (Part 4) (Part 5) (Part 6) (Part 7) (Part 8) (Part 9) (Part 10) (Part 11) (Part 12) (Part 13) (Part 14) (Part 15) (Part 16) (Part 17) (Part 18) (Part 19) (Part 20)

Time Skip lol, February, next year. Finals.

She and Jason had been together for 6 months around February. When finals started coming up. The distance and tension between the two was fucking palpable. They hadn't fought or anything, but the stress between them had caused a slight riff. They just had space to focus on their studies.

They would see each other at work. She was his secretary. Everyone, all their friends, even their families, swore they just needed to bone. Which, considering they both heard about this from Bruce first, didn't mean they wanted to do it.

If you had asked Y/N, she would have said she wasn't dressing for Jason. But that was a lie. She was tempted to go with the advice everyone was giving them, especially before they went into their first finals exam. She walked into his office.

"What are you doing?" he asked.

"Well, I'm your secretary. Seeing if you need anything."

"I don't."

She turned to walk out.

"That doesn't mean you can walk out."

She smiled to herself, "Alright." She sat on the chair in front of his desk, "I won't walk out."

"Mhm."

She frowned, he didn't even look up from his computer. "What do you want me here for, Jay?"

"Close the blinds on all my windows, baby."

"It'll become dark."

"Good."

"Your eyes will fry from the light of your computer."

"Trust me, they won't."

"Uh-huh," she doubted as she closed the blinds.

Jason walked up behind her and wrapped his arms around her waist, resting his head in the crook of her shoulder. She smiled and leaned her head on his.

"Exams fucking suck," Jason said.

"Couldn't have guessed from the riff in our relationship, really? You don't say?" she sarcastically retorted.

"It's not like we had it easy this entire time, either."

"Fuck you don't say? At least my attacker was admitted to Arkham and my friends got out."

"Can't catch a break," he paused because his buzzer went, "Can't catch a fucking break!" he exclaimed, exasperated. He went and answered it, "Jason Todd, who's using Y/N (Last Name)'s buzzer," he said, sounding annoyed.

"Hey, it's Dick. You two aren't fucking right, B will be pissed."

"Shut up. We aren't. What do you want."

"Someone's pissed. I need paperwork."

"Come and get it."

She crossed her arms and laughed when Dick entered the room. She slightly waved. He slightly waved back.

"You know, you two should bone. But not here," Dick joked. He walked over to one of the many, many filing cabinets to search for the paperwork he needed.

"You're really just riding the wave into Jason running you down, aren't you?" Y/N said.

"Well, we're always up for sparring."

"It probably won't be sparring, Dick. You know your brother. He's staring daggers into the back of your head."

"For Valentine's, I'll be giving Barbara the stress of taking care of me after Jason beats me to a pulp."

"At least you'll get one last Gala?" she joked.

"Will you be coming?"

"She will," Jason said.

"Amazing. Don't fuck on the dance floor," Dick joked.

"Fuck you."

"Love you too, Jase," he turned to walk out, "Love you too, Y/N."

"I'll be sure to tell you I love you at your funeral, Dick," she joked as he walked out. She paused before turning to Jason, "Gala?"

"Come, please," he said before going to hug her. "I miss you."

"You see me every day, Love."

"But we haven't been," he paused, "Well, a couple. In weeks. I miss you. The fun one who got me to run down the streets of Gotham on a skateboard."

"Dress code?"

"White tie."

"Dammnit. Guess I'm shopping."

"I'll give you my debit card?"

"I don't need it, baby. However," she joked, "I sure will take it."

He laughed and forked it over to her, "Don't spend my Ph.D. funds."

"I will gladly spend your Ph.D. funds."

"No," he laughed, "Please, I need those."

"I mean if you insist I spend it all," she said, laughing.

"The Gala's later tonight, you can take the rest of the day off."

"Kind of you to do."

"I know, I'm a gentleman."

"Truly," she kissed him. "I'll see you tonight."

"Can I come to get you?"

"Feel free too."

"Alright. I love you."

"I love you," she said before she left the office.

Getting into her car, she fumbled with the mirror a bit. She looked like a mom. The bags under her eyes and the formal get-up for an office job did her in.

They had said "I love you" for the first time around Christmas. She wished she caught the moment where they were fucking around and she just said it.

The Christmas lights surrounded them, hung in the trees. They had gone to see the New York City tree in Times Square. He was setting up a photo to take of the two of them and she just said it.

She could have sworn his fucking eyes lit up with green. Like they glowed.

Reminiscing on those small moments with Jason was something that would make her smile without fail. That man somehow unlocked a new set of feelings, stronger feelings. She was in touch with herself.

She went to her house first, to see how A/N was doing. To see her on the steps. She pulled into the driveway.

"Hey, you good?"

"Huh? Oh! Yeah, of course. Why?"

"I have to go get a dress for a Wayne Gala trademark, do you want to come to help me?"

"Of course I do!"

---------------------

"I guess you could say we didn't narrow shit down about a dress," Y/N joked as she came out in the 16th dress she had tried on.

"Okay, well, that one is the best so far," A/N said, seeming like they finally made progress.

"Wow, this is news, we've narrowed it down."

"Honestly consider it a miracle. Thank God Jason let you go from work early. Are you getting a full day's pay?" A/N asked.

"Probably. I told Bruce I didn't want a full day's pay if I wasn't there, but Bruce said it was in my contract. I think he's just being generous," Y/N said with a sigh.

"Did you not read your contract?"

"I did! That's why I think he's being generous. I don't think I'd forget something like that."

"Watch you did forget those words. You should ask him to see your contract, if he's disobeying it then the board members are probably at his ass about it," A/N explained.

"God, please no. I would hate being a contention point for the board members."

"They probably want you fired. And they're probably mad that you won't be fired because you're with Jason."

"Well, I'm also just a great secretary"

"See, each time you say that I assume it's because you give him a little something-something under his desk every day."

"I'll have you know we've never had sex in that office."

"Did you have sex in another office?" A/N questioned.

"I'm pleading the 5th to any further questioning."

"Wait, oh my god."

"Nope! Going to go try on another dress and ignore you now!" Y/N exclaimed with a joking tone.

"This one's the best," A/N said.

"We're making progress! I'm thinking if I go with this one, I add gloves."

"God, are you trying to give Jason a hard-on?"A/N joked.

"I would like to plead the 5th to any further questioning on the matter," Y/N retorted.

"You're evil. If you're going to be evil, you might as well wear a suit."

"I wish. After all the shit I've been through, I want to stick it to the fucks who keep judging me. I'm already so jeopardized, though. Jason goes through a lot of shit dating me. I'll wear the dress."

"Old white people are old white people."

"Well, Bruce is nice at least. If he's judgemental, at least I don't hear about it on the news," Y/N said and twirled. "Yeah, this one. I like this one."

"I also like that one. There's something about silk. Always gets someone to look like 50 million dollars. Probably worth that too."

Y/N fumbled with the tag, "It's not pure silk, so it's less. Only 1000$."

"Only 1000$? God, that's like our rent."

"Rent is more."

"Well if we weren't in a house it would be the same. That's insane. That's like 3-4 months of groceries."

"I know it's a lot to us commonfolk, but Jason is rich. He wouldn't mind. We might, but he wouldn't."

"Yeah, but do you feel okay with spending that much of his money?"

"I have no idea. We'll see. I'll go try another dress on."

"This is cute," Y/N said.

"Well of course it is, it's probably worth your college scholarship, though."

"God, don't remind me of prices."

"It's hard to forget prices when we're given a lot of money to spend."

"We can't spend all of it!"

"What's he using it for?" A/N asked in a half-joke.

"He's getting a Ph.D. in Criminal Psychology when we graduate."

"Okay, okay. So he needs it."

"Yeah, he doesn't let Bruce pay his bills, remember. He's making his own money, minus the working-for-his-dad part."

"Yeah, the working for Bruce part seems a bit counterintuitive."

"If he's getting paid, it doesn't matter to him."

"What's it even like working with his family? Especially with the tension between you and Jason?"

"It sucks. Jason and I haven't fought, yet. We have to act like we aren't fighting. Which makes everyone think we are fighting. Which makes both of us mad. Because apparently," she paused, "The way to fix fighting is having sex, apparently."

"So have sex?"

"Shut up."

"Family on your nerves?" A/N asked.

"They're so involved, but I love them all. I just wish we had a moment alone, I know it's hard to do in a fucking office, but still."

"Go try on another dress. Show up looking like a million bucks."

"You are simply so right."

"I feel like this is the mature version of the black sparkly spaghetti straps one," A/N said.

"It's like you mashed a bunch of words together and suddenly I have to sell you my first-born son."

"Well, it's true!" She laughed, "It's a grown-up version, what someone, old white people, would expect of you."

"Old white people expect a lot."

"Jason's going to be one, one day," A/N joked.

"He's got not-white features," Y/N said, trying to picture his face. There was something about him. Something not-white. She had always picked up on it, but she could never tell what it was.

"Well, it's not like you can ask his mom her ethnicity."

"Jeez, that would be so rude of me to do. Let's just say it's... it's not my place."

"He's got secrets?" A/N questioned.

"Tall, handsome, mysterious. That's my Jason."

"A little bit of everything, all of the time," A/N said in a sing-song tune, specifically the "Welcome to the Internet" tune.

"Don't quote Bo Burnham to me, that album broke me," Y/N joked

"Who didn't it break? Oh, wait, probably Jason."

"He probably sobbed like a baby at it, I don't know where you got the "Emotionless" trope from, A/N."

"Can you blame me? He's a Wayne."

"Those are some of the most emotionally connected people I know? Like, genuinely, they're probably more in touch with themselves than you and I."

"Well, they don't exactly have the reputation for being able to discern their emotions, you know."

"You need to stop interacting with tabloids and their articles," Y/N said, seeming exasperated with the tabloids and the line of conversation. But that was nothing new. She hated the press, the articles, the paparazzi. She hated them all.

"Yeah, probably. You hate them for a reason."

"Do you not know about that time they made it so we couldn't get into our car?" Y/N asked.

"You did, you did."

"Fuckin' tabloids."

"Go try on another dress before you explode from rage."

"Valid," Y/N said, laughing.

"God, if only this wasn't a white tie event," Y/N said and sighed.

"I mean, you could just wear it."

"I will get my ass handed to me, however," she said, taking a picture, "Maybe Jason will just let me get it if I pay him back?"

"You don't have the money right now?" A/N asked.

"I need to get paid and I'll have enough," Y/N explained.

"Don't tell me this is worth more than our rent."

"I will just simply not tell you."

"Girl, you can't."

"Money is dumb and I hate it."

A/N laughed, "Which one do you want to go with?"

"Uh, probably the silk one."

"Temptress."

"I will literally buy and wear a corset to make Jason's life hard to get you off my back," Y/N laughed.

"I implore you to do so for the joke."

"Shut up," Y/N joked.

She still sent the picture of the last dress to Jason off-handedly. Asked him how he felt about it since she knew she loved it.

Why don't you just get it? He had sent back.

Can't afford it.

I can.

Please let me pay you back for this.

Just take me on a date.

I can do that.

You should.

I'll see you soon.

She laughed and grabbed both dresses.

"Jason's buying both?" A/N asked.

"Mhm! I have to take him on a fun date in return."

"You were probably going to do it both ways, honestly."

"You just know me so well."

-----------------------

They had gone and gotten the gloves before heading back to their house. Laughing and blasting rock songs the entire time. There was something about the bass running through the car and having the windows rolled down while screaming the songs. It was insane.

One of the songs they blasted was "I Think I'm OKAY" by Machine Gun Kelly and YUNGBLUD, switching out the vocals. It was fun to take breaks like that and, just enjoy each other's presence. Especially during finals season, where both of them were stressed because of their respective finals.

Everyone was stressed. Finals did that to everyone. Whether someone was in school or not, they felt the teenagers and college students lose their minds about it.

They got out of the car at their home and took the dresses inside. A/N went to go study in her room while Y/N went to go hang up her dresses. She entered her room and instantly remembered why she hated her laptop.

The laptop fan was deafening, it's why she barely had Jason over at her house anymore. She cleaned it constantly but, it kept going and going.

She brought it to the Wayne Manor over the Winter Break because she had work to do but wanted to see Jason, and everyone, everyone, commented on the thing.

They compared it to a screaming goat, an electronic mess, a horse-powered fan, anything they could put together with electronic, goat and fan, they called the laptop that.

Bruce even offered to buy her a new one, but she declined. She didn't think it was broken, so it didn't need to be replaced or fixed. If it was still in working condition, she was going to use it until it bluescreened on her.

Much to everyone's dismay.

She hated the fucking thing. So if she could drown it out with music, you bet your ass she did. She was grateful that her parents had sent it to her, but she assumed it was because they hated it too. She was right. No one liked that laptop.

She went to go shower. She figured if she fucked with her appearance and hair a bit, then the press would get off her back. She hadn't exactly tried to impress them thus far. But she wanted to just live her life.

She figured doing her hair, makeup, wearing the right clothes, she'd get harassed less. There was a lot of pressure dating a Wayne, she had realized.

She was constantly in the media, somehow she became an idol for little girls in the span of months. It was a lot for someone to take on. She embraced it normally. With open arms normally.

But A/N had told her that she started sleep-talking. Screaming about the eyes, the people watching her. She knew it was probably connected to the stress she was under dating Jason, but she really didn't want to deal with it.

If she ignored it, no one could tell her to deal with it. If she hid it, no one had to see it. She was looking into soundproofing her room so that A/N didn't have to see it.

Was it healthy to do that? Probably not. Probably far from the concept of healthy coping mechanisms.

She got out of the shower and started playing with her appearance. If she ended up with loud makeup and hair after this, she was going to just accept it.

She did end up with pretty loud eyeshadow. But her hair was fine, as acceptable as it could get for everyone judging her. Only nude lipstick that was just two, maybe three shades darker than her skin was what she needed. She kind of overdid the eyeshadow, so it had to be balanced.

Nerves by Icon for Hire was playing in her room. And in a way, that was how she felt. There was a lot of feeling in her, that she wasn't made for the life she was starting to lead. That being an idol was how she was going, but she couldn't do it.

She sighed and put on heels. White heels. It would be easier to put them on before the dress and gloves. The corset came on next. IT wasn't anything special, and she was capable of putting it on without help.

But then the dress.

"She loved that dress, but it wasn't the other one. The other one sparked a little bit of joy in her, while this one just conformed to everyone's opinions of her.

She wanted to wear the other one, so, so, fucking badly.

And finally the gloves. It was an outfit she thought was cute but would be torn to shreds in the media. She knew that.

The media liked to eat her alive.

Part of her wanted a break from it all. The other part wanted to do an interview with the press, to shit-talk all of them and make them weep. She wanted to be the one to destroy them.

Revenge was best served cold though, and the rage was far too hot in her head to even begin a proper essay on why they sucked.

She turned off the music in her room and was greeted with the lovely sounds of her computer fan. Comforting, but hatred.

Jason was going to be there any minute. Was she even ready for a Gala?

They had been through so much.

---------------------------------

She walked to his car. He brought one of the fancy ones.

"You couldn't just like, own a not expensive car?" she joked.

"Why would I do that?"

She laughed and handed him his debit card, "I don't know, to keep the press off your ass?"

"I think they'd find us no matter what," he said as he backed out of her driveway, "You look beautiful by the way."

"Thank you, Love. You're as handsome as always."

"Simp."

"Alas, I admit it," she joked as she turned on the radio. "I swear the media is going to have a field day today."

"When do they not?"

"That's fair."

"I'm sorry this school year's been fucking our relationship," he sighed, "We deserve better and a better chance than what we've been dealt."

"Unfortunately that's how school works."

"Fuck school sometimes. Not everyone gets as hit as badly as us."

"It's the psychology teachers. If any teachers are strict, they are."

"We still deserve a break."

"Well, there's always when finals are over."

"I swear we're doing something nice when finals end."

"That's not that hard to do."

The tension in that car was palpable. Truly, you could cut that with a knife. A diamond's edge.

They got to the Gala before anyone, except the Waynes.

"Hey lot," Y/N said.

"Y/N! Glad you could make it!" Stephanie said and pulled her into a hug, "The guys suck, so I like you the most today."

She laughed, "What did they do?"

"They won't play rooftop tag with me."

"Why do you even play that game?" Y/N asked.

"Agility! I'm a track star, duh. I drag them with me."

"Ah, how could I be so foolish," she laughed as Stephanie pulled her towards the other girls. Y/N waved at the boys while laughing. "You do know I have a boyfriend who wants to see me, right?"

"It's Jason."

"Good observation."

"Shut up. I claim you."

"You can't claim me!" she jokingly exclaimed, loud enough for the boys to hear.

"Steph, that's my girlfriend!" Jason yelled back.

"Not anymore!" She yelled as she pulled Y/N into the building.

"Explanation?" Y/N asked, "Do you have an issue or something?"

"I don't. Babs does."

"Go on?"

"Ask her."

Y/N sighed and walked up to Barbara and Cassandra, "I heard you have an issue or something?"

"Yes! You! Okay so," Barbara said, "We're all worried about you and Jason."

"Oh, Jeez," Y/N sighed.

"No no, listen. We can feel the tension. Have you been fighting?"

"I told you before, we aren't."

"Then what is it? 'Cause I'm known for being a detective, hello, I'm Jim Gordon's daughter. And even I can't figure it out."

"Probably exams. Exams suck."

"Oh! It's because you're not used to the fame," Cassandra said.

"Okay, Cassie. Listen, it's-"

"It is isn't it!" Stephanie exclaimed.

"Ugh. Yes. Are you happy now?"

"C'mon, it isn't that bad is it?" Barbara asked.

"It is. They've been at my throat with daggers ever since I met Jason."

"Who's been at your throat with daggers?" Jason asked.

"Don't worry about it," Y/N said before anyone could open their mouths and say to the contrary.

"Well, then. Everyone should be here soon," Bruce said. "Wish we had entertainment this time."

"Can't Y/N sing?" Tim asked.

"Uh, yeah?" Y/N said.

"So sing," Tim said.

"Tim. C'mon. Don't do me like this, man."

"Think about it," Bruce said and put a hand on her shoulder, "It could be fun."

She laughed and everyone scattered except her and Jason.

"So, the daggers comment?" he asked.

"Media reference."

He sighed, "You can always step out of the spotlight, my love. Step down, walk away from their eyes but still be in mine."

"I'll think about it."

He took her hands, "You should think quicker," he joked.

She laughed and he pulled her into the ballroom she knew all-too-well at this point. The first time she was there ran through her mind like no one was watching, the beauty in her memory for capturing it like that.

She knew once the pictures were released she'd probably attempt to paint it.

Galas were stuffy and full of people. She didn't like the people aspect. When strangers would come up to her and start talking, she'd get freaked out. They knew her, but she didn't know them.

She wasn't involved in getting to know people high-up in the world. She was a simple secretary who was dating one of the CEOs.

She'd get twirled around by people's sons. Stuck in dances and conversations. She almost always found herself with one of the Waynes after she ran from someone she didn't know.

She did figure if she sang she'd get away from everyone. So, in a fit of trying to get away, she found her way to Selina.

"Hey!" she said.

"Y/N! Are you running again?"

"Yes ma'am."

"Do you want to sing or something, Bruce said he asked you to."

"He did, and I figured, "Fuck it" so here I am."

Jason came up just as she said that, "Duet?" he asked.

"Now that's an idea and a half."

"You kids, always doing crazy stuff," Selina joked, "Le me see what I can do for 'ya."

"We're really doing this?" Jason asked as Selina slinked off.

"I guess so!" she exclaimed and he pulled her in for a kiss.

"Really saying "Fuck you" to the press today, huh?"

"Well, they're always saying "Fuck you" to me."

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frogboy0 · 3 years

Text

Amphibia season 1 rewatch + notes :)

So I just finished rewatching the ENTIRE season 1 of Amphibia and I have some notes on the episodes that stood out to me! There are some quick notes, a couple lengthy analyses and even some headcanons sprinkled in! It's like a written stew of season 1! I'll be doing a written Amphiba stew for season 2 too!!

It's kinda long so you could just skip this or hit the keep reading button and give it a read!

S1: E2 Cane Crazy

Anne shows general disregard over other people's things

(Mimicking Hop Pop and breaking his cane, throwing all the wood carving things that Loggle made, even a coo coo clock that she even said was nice (And for him to say it took 20 years to make right after she broke it))

S1: E2 Flood, Sweat and Tears

Anne would be the WORST during sleepovers and I LOVE IT!!! My girl is just being a tween, staying up late, playing would you rather and keeping everyone else up. I think that's ADORABLE and now I'm thinking about how sleepovers might've been back home with her, Sasha and Marcy…

She also just stays up late in general?? She reads dumb magazines and eats CRUNCHY snacks. She is really just 13,,,

And it looks like Sprig does it too, not as much as Anne (probably because he is younger than her) but it seems like it has to be in his terms. Before, he looked to be annoyed with it when he was trying to sleep. But, if he was awake, like in the beginning or at the end of the episode, he had no problem staying up playing would you rather!!!

S1: E3 Hop Luck

Anne: Old things are dumb!

And

Anne:* violently GRABS Sprig and shoves him against the wall* don't you DARE talk about pineapple in my pizza… Ever…

Anne:

Sprig:

Anne: Okay! Let's go get these ingredients!

HHHH ANNE!!! I love this funky little child SO MUCH!!!

Hop Pop loves these kids so much that he was willing to put aside his old, traditional family recipes in exchange for making pizza with them. My heart is gonna explode I'm-

Anne please don't make your surrogate frog brother get married just to get some pizza dough I'M BEGGING YOU-

S1: E3 Stakeout

Hop Pop: I'm a crisp 68!

Is Hop Pop actually 68 or does he mean more of 68 going on 80 68? Either way he looks great!

Anne has Blam Berry Blitz ("the drink that punches you in the face and doesn't stop") in her bag along with all the OTHER stuff we already saw (air pump, toe nail clipper, pencils, cat toys, bath bombs, etc)

Anne is officially those friends that have EVERYTHING in their bag no matter what.

I really like the relationship between Anne and Hop Pop, how they both in some way yearn for what was but in different ways (Anne wanting to go home and Hop Pop's olden ways when he was a little pollywog) but are still similar in how they try to remember. They try and try and try to keep what little family/friends they have safe and protected. They love the relationships they've formed with other people (And with each other) and would go great lengths to help and protect them!

Also I MAY be looking way too into it buuuut was Boulder-Tron (that rock dude that Polly hallucinated at the end) supposed to foreshadow Frobo??

S1: E4 Taking Charge

Okay quick one, Anne nearly having a whole ass panic attack when her phone dies because she couldn't look at her photos or videos of home actually made me sad. This girl is only a CHILD and her entire home and everything is gone and she for real thought she couldn't ever get it back,,,

Hop Pop: I mean, the part where the island itself is revealed to actually be…!

Sprig: No!

Polly: Don't!

Anne: Spoilers

I dunno why and again, I MIGHT BE LOOKING TOO DEEPLY INTO THIS, but maybe this is foreshadowing something with the land of Amphibia? That maybe there is more to this crazy land than we know? Maybe even a reason it, along with all the other universes even exists???

S1: E5 Breakout Star

AHSBWJOA ONLY EPISODE 5 AND ANNE ALREADY HAS HER PHONE'S LOCK SCREEN OF THE PLANTER FAMILY I'M-

S1: E7 Dating Season

Anne said that ⅔ of ALL soul mates start out as "just friends"

…

I'm looking at you, team Sashannarcy

S1: E7 Anne vs. Wild

Hop Pop's behavior at the end of the episode when Anne finally shows them the calamity box is awfully sus…

He doesn't say anything but "may I?" To inspect the box and then is like "Nope, never seen it" I just feel like he knows something and then adding onto it with the whole burying it to protect his family just sounds like… he definitely knows something, maybe not a lot but there is something he's not telling the others

Also, why would a book that HE has have information on the Calamity box??

(I fully support the Dr. P was a Planter and also possibly the pink frog who was friends with King Andrias theory)

S1: E10 Toad Tax

At this point, Anne said that she has already been in Amphibia for over a month now.

(And damn, Sasha's been in prison for like a month,,, yikes)

Also Hop Pop teaching Anne how to pay taxes is so adorable, she really is part of this family now guys,,,

And I love how Anne was able to win over the Wartwood people by being her natural, charming and not to mention caring self. Anne, like Marcy and Sasha, can be selfish because honestly what kid, especially a 13 year old, isn't.

But what matters is that she always tries to make up for it.

Yes she did join the arguably sketchy toads into getting the taxes from everyone in order to feel somewhat included in ANYTHING, but while she was doing it, she knew it was wrong. Anne knew it was wrong and tried to give back some of the stolen stuff. Hell, even at the end she risked her safety to protect people she felt didn't even LIKE her, like, Anne literally broke her arm from them because that's just how Anne is.

S1: E10 Prison Break

I always forget how like,,, SUPER cunning Sasha is. I mean, she was able to talk FIVE toads into quitting within a WEEK as a PRISONER. Like??

Grime: That's not a bird. It's a heron, a murderous predator that happens to love the taste of flesh

Sasha: Cute

The lines in this show I'M-

So Anne was a varsity tennis player and Sasha was a cheerleader and did Tai Chi. I still can't believe they were both jocks,,,

(Well, Sasha I get but Anne? Sweet ol' lil baby with the lanky limbs Anne???)

Hey um, why the FUCK does Grime have acid spit?

Sasha: *looking at photo of her, Anne, and Marcy* Hold on for a little longer, girls. I'm coming for you. And when I find you, we're gonna get home. But first, I think we're gonna have some fun with this place

Okay so this line right here. Now I may not be even remotely correct but this line, this last piece of dialogue spoken by Sasha right before the episode ends leads me to believe that she… doesn't take this world seriously.

At least not yet.

I think the 3 girls all see Amphibia differently: Anne as more of an obstacle, a wall preventing her from being home, Marcy sees it as an escape from her life with constant stimuli, and Sasha, she sees it as just really another thing to control. Everyone and their mothers know that Sasha can be a little more than controlling and we all know that she liked being lieutenant just a little too much.

This world is interesting to Sasha, not in the interesting that Anne sees it (who is interesting in the new people and the relationships she's formed) or Marcy (who is also interested in the relationships she's formed along with the thirst for knowledge and again, the constant stimuli in an environment where she isn't stifled and allowed to flourish).

No, Sasha sees Amphibia as interesting because it gives her something to control. In a world that is not your own, a world that you will leave eventually, who would actually FOLLOW the rules put in place there? Especially a 13 year old who is basically like a war commander who, even if she does do something wrong or breaks a rule or two, the only person who might even dare to stop her is Grime, and even then, he might just encourage it because it is season 1 and they aren't that close and he doesn't really care for Sasha at this point.

She also is actually very logical. Everything she does in Amphibia, all the morally questionable things she does, it is always for the same reason (or at least at first), to get her and her girls home. Wanting to sacrifice and kill Hop Pop at the end of season 1? Well The toads had promised if she helped, they'll help her find Marcy and bring the 3 of them home. She cares for Anne and Marcy SO MUCH that she is willing to go great lengths to help keep them safe.

But even though Sasha didn't really care about anyone in Amphibia besides Anne and Marcy at first, it doesn't mean she won't ever. We see countless times throughout season 2 of Sasha caring. She feels regret with her impending betrayal on Anne and Marcy, she cares enough to try and warn Anne about King Andrias' evil plans. Hell, even in the season 3 intro we see her and Grime at Wartwood and it looks like they're gonna be starting another rebellion against the king to help all the amphibians in Amphibia.

I just really like watching Sasha's appearance and knowing what will happen in the future with her character.

S1: E13 Trip to the Archives

Anne: I get this place. It's like a library from my world. Zoo books and manga, here I come!

So whenever Anne goes to the library, presumably with Sasha and Marcy, she'd go straight to books on animals and manga probably while Marcy did whatever work they needed (if Anne's dialogue in season 2 with Marcy always doing the work for their group projects was anything to go off on)

I dunno, I think that's kinda cute that Anne liked reading books on animals and probably reading all the manga that Marcy recommended.

Maybe Anne and Sasha would sit right next to each other while Marcy worked and read fun manga together and cackle with each other while Marcy tried SO HARD to concentrate and NOT infodump to them because she's read that specific manga 20 times and HAVE YOU GOTTEN TO THAT ONE PART WHERE THE MAIN CHARACTER GOES-

S1: E15 Wally and Anne

MOSS MAN!!

When Anne wakes up in the middle of the night and goes to grab Wally at town square, her hood is up and it's dark. The only thing we can make out of her face are…

Glowing blue eyes.

Glowing eyes that share an uncanny resemblance to the moss men.

And Anne loves doing elaborate, silly handshakes? That's so CUTE! Too bad none of her friends liked them as much as she did :(

When they finally reached the foggy mountain place, Anne noticed glowing blue butterflies and started to follow them, which led her right to the moss man.

WAIT ANNE ALSO DID ROCK CLIMBING BACK HOME?? FUCKING JOCK!!!

S1 E20 Reunion

Okay I WAS about to say that there wasn't anything to say about this last episode that hasn't already been said before BUT

The last couple moments, when Anne is holding Sasha off the cliff and trying to pull her up with the Planters, there's a couple interesting shots that I would like to talk about.

While the Planters were holding onto Anne, they say things like "Hang on, Anne! We got you no matter what!"

And even when the stone cliff starts to chip and break, none of the frogs back off, they don't loosen their grips, they just keep holding onto Anne.

And they will never let go.

Because they love her. Because in only 3 months, Anne was able to get a surrogate frog family and dozens of other frog friends in Wortwood. Because Anne has this amazing support system both literally and metaphorically. Because Anne is Anne. And Sasha...

Isn't like Anne.

Matt Bradly himself even said that both Sasha and Anne are different from Anne, Anne is the heart, the emotional connection in their logical worlds. Anne can make so many friends so easily and Sasha… Sasha became a war genral, she lost a fight against the one person who she thought would never fight back.

Sasha doesn't have what Anne has. She doesn't have the kind of skills to make such strong relationships, the kind where you risk your life for the other, in such a short amount of time.

Hell, they even play a song called "Lean on Me", Anne has people to lean on and they would lean on her just the same. She found these people, made these friends, formed amazing relationships, in only THREE months.

"Maybe you're better off without me"

And Sasha was only dragging her down.

Sasha loves Anne, she cares for her and would do anything to protect her. That's why she let go. She didn't want to drag Anne down, to hurt her more than she already has.

Sasha would do anything for Anne, even die.

Over all notes:

Season 1 is SUPER FUNNY!! The lines hit and they don't rely on toilet humor to get the audience to laugh. They use great one liners and physical humor that isn't fart or butt jokes. They do an excellent job on showing how crazy the world of Amphibia is through humor like how the animals are always eating each other.

I really like how the characters were crafted so carefully! And the storyline!!! You could notice things that get explored in season 2 and I can't WAIT to see how many bread crumbs were left to lead up to season 3!

HOW DOES ANNE KEEP SO MANY THINGS IN HER BOOK BAG???

That stuff is in her SCHOOL BAG, why would she bring it to school??? So far I've got an air pump, toe nail clippers, pencils, cat toys, bath bombs and an energy drink. WHY??? I wonder if she held on to any of Sasha or Marcy's things too or ever forgot to give them back

Also again, I'M STILL IN SHOCK OF ANNE BEING A JOCK. I don't even know why I am, I knew she played sports and stuff it's just,,, she's so lanky,,,

Her and Sasha are jock buddies and WILL shove other jocks in lockers if they ever pick on their nerd Marcy.

I also am in LOVE with Hop Pop's screams lmao

Be ready for an analysis of season 2!

#amphibia #anne boonchuy #hopadiah plantar #hop pop #sprig planter #polly planter #sasha waybright #Marcy wu #season 1 #analysis #my ramblings

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your--isgayrights · 3 years

Note

not sure if this is what you had in mind but i was thinking maybe kdj and hsy meeting briefly earlier in life (at 20/22 years old or sth)? maybe having a misunderstanding or an argument over something trivial (like interpretation of a book or who should take the last lemon flavored popsicle in the store) and somehow still managing to reach some recognition or understanding of each other. years later they would forget about each other but still remember that bizarre situation sometimes. i have no idea if that makes any sense but i believe in your writing and massive brain and powerful swag. xoxo

Aaaaah, Exe I'm sorry if this isn't exactly what you asked for... I was just like... what if that time Han Sooyoung and Kim Dokja almost met in the epilogue went a little differently and like... haha...

The first part is basically copied and pasted from that chapter before the twist, so go read that first if you haven't!

Han Su-Yeong staggered and walked closer to Kim Dok-Ja. Several passersby brushing past her looked back in suspicion.

Kim Dok-Ja was now walking down the subway’s steps.

Kim Dok-Ja, with earphones stuck in his ears and reading something on his phone while walking downstairs.

She knew what he was currently reading.

“—!!”

She barely managed to shout, but her voice still didn’t come out. So, she desperately chased after him.

Because of the story you wrote, author-nim, I was able to survive until now. Han Su-Yeong was also able to survive while reading the sole reader’s words.

She managed to write the next part of Yu Jung-Hyeok’s life through them.

She was able to endure her boring and stuffy teen years, the days she never wanted to go back to, thanks to those words.

This train is bound for… She spotted Kim Dok-Ja standing on the platform, waiting for the next train to arrive. A person hiding within the small world crafted out of letters to protect himself was standing right there.

Kim Dok-Ja, who didn’t know anything about the apocalypse about to happen.

Kim Dok-Ja, who’d get to live on the expansive world of the ‘Ways of Survival’.

Kim Dok-Ja, who’d get to meet the protagonist he so longed to become.

Kim Dok-Ja, who’d become the ‘Demon King of Salvation’.

Kim Dok-Ja, who’d sacrifice himself multiple times for the sake of his companions, and as a result, came to the 1863rd turn and met her.

Kim Dok-Ja, who was destined to become the ‘Most Ancient Dream’, the price he paid for loving a certain story too much.

[Your mental state is crumbling!]

[The main body’s ego is regaining its control.]

[Your Fable is being extinguished.]

Her legs grew heavy, and her arms didn’t want to move anymore. Her body was gradually becoming not hers.

Even then, Han Su-Yeong wanted to tell him.

⸢To tell him that he was definitely not at fault for this story being born. And to tell him that the things he was about to experience were not his sins.⸥

Because, her past 13 years existed solely to say those words to him.

⸢To say that, though you have grown up while reading this story, there’s no need for you to become it.⸥

She barely managed to muster up her strength, her arm coiling in on itself and preparing for her one last willful action.

[Your ego will convert into the ‘subconsciousness’.]

As she set her weak, pre-scenario body into that final decisive movement...

The twenty six year old Han Su-yeong who knew nothing of the soon to come apocalypse, woke up thrusting her fist forward into the face of some guy on the subway.

She would've thought she was still dreaming, if it hadn't been for the feeling of his soft cheek slamming against the hard bone of his teeth under the force of her balled up hand.

'What the hell? Why am I doing this?'

Han Su-yeong most likely would have asked herself these things if she had any more time to think before her punch had landed.

She got her answer, though. Despite never asking her question, that reason she was looking for became clear as the man staggered off his balance.

He made a futile attempt to right himself before being knocked to the ground. The phone that he had been holding so close to his face clattering screen-side up onto the concrete of the subway floor.

That was when she saw it.

She only had to read a snippet of the words on that phone screen to come up with an explanation for her own actions at that very moment.

[There are three ways to survive in a ruined world. Now, I have forgotten a few, but one thing is certain. The fact that you who are reading this now will survive.

-Three ways to survive in a ruined world

Author’s words: Thank you so much for reading ‘Ways of Survival’ up to here. I will come back to you with an epilogue!]

'Ways of Survival.' 'Three ways to survive in a ruined world.'

...

Yes, there was no doubt that this guy sat on the subway floor rubbing at his cheek deserved it.

Some latent evil of the world must be working to Han Su-yeong's advantage, because none of the commuter passing by spared her a second glance as she sorted out her own motives. They simply dodged around her and the man she had assaulted moments ago.

If Han Su-yeong had to write some train of thought into their actions, she might imagine these negligent bystanders saw something like an overly dramatic lover's spat. Something personal that they ought not get involved in.

Were it not for the pervasiveness of such a cliche recurrent in physical altercations between men and women, maybe they would see it for what it was. A question of honor between authors.

Because Han Su-yeong was certain that was who this man was. An author who was so shitty that he had created an alt to try and hype up his terrible novel.

That was right... It was years ago now, but Han Su-yeong remembered that unsubstantiated accusation of plagiarism on her first published webnovel, SSSSS-grade Infinite Regressor.

This shitty guy had made an alt account that was so obvious... it was something 'Dok-ja,' like he wasn't even trying to pretend he didn't make it just to pretend to 'read' his own webnovel...

If that didn't prove it, then it was also clear from the comments that he had left on every single chapter. When she was reading them, Han Su-yeong had known that if she were such a bad author that she would have to have just one reader, the words that he wrote represented that perfect amount of reader to author engagement that she would have desired.

But that sort of relationship... it was unrealistic. Han Su-yeong had been an author for something like 13 years now, and she had never had such a relationship in her entire career.

So it was obvious that a reader like that could only be written by an author with those same desires that she held.

And then he even had the nerve to wander out of his self contained fantasy, accusing her superior work of plagiarizing his shitty one just to draw in more views and commenters.

So of course he had a lot of nerve to be rereading his own damn author's note right where she could see hi-

"Can I help you?"

Han Su-yeong felt all of the hot air she had been blowing herself up with to justify her current situation deflate upon hearing that voice of his.

The man she'd injured looked up at her with hollow black eyes. Eyes that perhaps had only seemed bright while being illuminated by a screen.

His voice was mild, too. As if getting punched in the face were something that was merely tiresome to him, instead of something to stir anger or indignity. The reactions that Han Su-yeong had been mentally preparing herself to butt heads with.

Nothing about his reaction seemed to ask Han Su-yeong for her motives. There was no race to find an explanation behind those hollow eyes. No bit lip, straining to come up with a turn of phrase to become an appropriately biting retort.

This guy wasn't an author.

...

Hey...

Why had she punched this guy again?

"Sorry." Han Su-yeong found herself saying, as her body deflated, extended arm going back to her side. "From the behind, you looked like my shitty ex."

She let herself fall into the cliche.

"Ah. I see."

Han Su-yeong hated the guy's expression, just then.

It was one that said, 'Well isn't that just my luck?'

But she couldn't help but watch, as this unlucky guy stood up and picked up his phone, brushing it off instead of himself, as if it were more precious to him than his own body.

And when that Dok-ja turned around, Han Su-yeong only saw his back for a second, before the sight of him was once more swallowed up by the uncaring world of the subway station crowd.

#exe i know you're kind of lowkey evil and didn't read the epilogue all the way through and its ok i love you but im coercing you now ok <3 #Parts that are from the original are in italics they're from 535 #orv spoilers #also i know i usually do the names from the Rainbow Turtle translation but I decided to style match for this one #not beta'd #writing #ficlet #han sooyoung #han suyeong #kim dokja #hsy #kdj #orv #omniscient reader #also xoxoxo exe

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themagical1sa · 2 years

Note

Hey I saw ur fandoms and ur in resident evil fandom. Also I am in the fandom of Resident evil 8. :) my favourite part of re is part 8. Urs what's ur favoruite part of resident evil franchise?

Mm, that's hard to answer, admittedly! (´⊙ω⊙`) Let me explain why...

I was first introduced to Resident Evil by my dad -- this was around over 8 years ago now, when I was 10 years old. I found him playing Resident Evil 3, and I used to be behind him while watching him play. I used to be super scared of Nemesis then. 😱😆

Sometime after that, I discover the Hollywood film series version that has Alice in it (of which I call the Alice AU). I didn't get too into it after hearing that it had nothing to do with the video game's canon.

I don't fully get into Resident Evil until my dad and I purchase Resident Evil 5 for my Xbox 360. I was already 12 and about to turn 13 in a few months then. I have never been the same since -- I have finished the game countless times (mostly in the easy to normla difficulties) and have read the lore provided in the game. I would get Resident Evil 6 a few months later; admittedly, I have yet to collect all of the game's Serpent Symbols. They're harder to find than RE5's BSAA Emblems. 😅

Aside from reading the files provided in the games, I also found myself frequenting the Resident Evil wiki and reading about the characters as well as the canon's history. I was so geeked out that I practically memorized the events of the games and the CGI movies. I don't know them to the detail yet, but I am certainly knowledgeable enough to know significant events.

I remember being excited for RE7, but also a little upset that I wouldn't get to see my classic favorites (at least from the trailers and demos; I had yet to see that Chris Redfield was in RE7). I wasn't able to play the game then so I watched PewDiePie complete the game -- I remember being so confused with the new plotline and Chris Redfield working with Blue Umbrella. I mean, Chris Redfield, founder of BSAA who considered Umbrella Corp. as the bane of his existence, working with Umbrella? Something wasn't right about it, but it got explained to me in RE8. Again, I didn't have the hardware powerful enough to play it, so I watched Markiplier play RE8. At this point, I already warmed up to Ethan Winters enough to like him, but I still wonder where Resident Evil's overall story is going... I mean, the narrative sure has shifted since RE7, huh? Not to mention how Chris and the BSAA seem to be having a lot of disagreements lately... it really makes me wonder what's going on.

TL;DR Resident Evil has been a part of me since my childhood. I have been and always will be here for the lore and the characters, and so far I'm still intrigued to where the story will go. All the games are fun too, so it's really hard to pick a game. ✌️😗

Ooh, did I mention that I considered taking biochemistry because of Resident Evil? RE5 and RE6 gave me glimpses of what laboratory science looked like (though perhaps exaggerated) and I thought, "Damn, that's a cool job to have. Maybe i want to be a scientist, actually!" 🧑‍🔬🤔

Anyway, that's all from me! ✨

#[ 🗣️ | the magical girl replies ]#[ 👤 | glxssyhexrts ]#resident evil #biohazard #biohazard resident evil #resident evil biohazard #if you look in my resident evil tag / use the search bar on my blog to type 'bela dimitrescu' then you might find the layout I made for her #share ko lang

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extremelyblackandwhite · 3 years

Text

heiress - 2

pairing: bucky barnes x oc!reader

a/n: this is part two of a four part series based on a song lyrics sent to me by an amazing anon with a reader based on my favourite oc. hope you enjoy xx

“letters strewn across your bedroom floor. such beautiful words but you can’t remember who they’re for“

previous chapter

His memories had always been foggy. Even after slipping from HYDRA’s control, his memories were still foggy. He could remember almost everything through a sepia-like filter yet his memory as even more distorted the moment he looked at her. He had this gut wrenching feeling he had known her yet his foggy red tinted memories gave him no answer as to who this woman was and whenever he tried digging deeper into his subconscious. he would just get tired. Almost as if his own mind did not allow him to know her but he knew he must’ve seen her face or her figure somewhere and if he hadn’t then he must’ve known her in another life because whenever he looked at her, he felt comfortable. It was an odd sensation to explain, a deja-vu like feeling, a feeling which made him want to run up to her and held her into his arms but she was a stranger. Everything was strange here even Wanda who despite him having shared a few words with, looked so distant.

- When did Wanda have time to have two ten year olds? - Sam threw himself to one of the beds in the room the two of them had been assigned to. Sharon had gotten a different room yet Sam and Bucky were bunking together like 13 year old campers. - Also can she resuscitate people now? I mean, he’s an android but nevertheless. Oh my god, how did an android and a human had kids?

- Do you trust them? Sharon isn’t too convinced.

- Well, Wanda fought by our side so did Vision and Fury and Hill are with them. Unless they all turned evil, I think we can somewhat trust them.

- I don’t know, Sam. I ... I don’t trust the girl.

- They’re almost all girls, cyborg brain. Be specific. Did specificity did not exist in the 40s?

- The one who dropped her gun first.

- Maybe, she’s Pierce’s kid or so says Sharon. Maybe you used to babysit her.

- No, I ...

- Sergeant Barnes ... - Monica knocked on the door before allowing herself into the bedroom. - There were some letters in the file written by you. We believe it is not our right to intrude onto your privacy so we wanted to give them to you.

- God, every time I discover something about you, it makes you sound even older than you are. - Sam leaned against the bed frame as Bucky warringly took the letters from the Monica who left the room once her job was done.

The paper had grown old with time, yellowing around the borders of the Red Room envelopes they used to give the girls who behaved well enough so they could send their parents some news. He remembered stealing a few to try and write any memories which came through so he wouldn’t forget them when the officers erased him. Somehow they always found the letters yet there it was in his hands, a big stack of letters which seemingly hadn’t been destroyed. It was his handwriting that much he knew, however he did not know who Daisy was, he did not know who had the name to which the letters were addressed to.

- Who did you write letters to? Steve?

- Daisy. - he didn’t mean to reply but those words just seemed to flow naturally from him and he was entranced by the name in his handwriting alone.

The snow felt step onto the ground, it was cold, cold enough everyone was wearing jackets inside despite the heater being on and he seemed to have been transported back into his memories. Everyone was cold and covered but not her and no matter how hard he tried to make up her face, it was fogged up in his memory but he could see her, he could see her in her strap black ballet top and worn out pink ballerina shoes which she had particularly asked Madam B not to be replaced. He could see her, but he couldn’t make her out, he didn’t know who she was.

- Daisy, you’re going to get sick. - Bucky could hear himself speak but he wasn’t speaking, he wasn’t there, he was just reliving a memory.

- Don’t call me Daisy. I hate it when you call me Daisy.

- Hey, cyborg brain? Are you ok? - Sam’s voice was echoey until he touched his shoulder and then he was harshly brought back to reality. - Don’t bug out on me, I don’t know how to reset you.

- Yeah, just thinking.

The night was long, too long and he spent every minute of it reading every single letter he had written this woman until they were all spread out across the floor of the room; but we loved with a love that was more than love me and my Daisy, I’m sorry Daisy, I miss you Daisy. Daisy, Daisy, Daisy, Daisy. He had read that name more than a hundred times and he still couldn’t remember who she was yet he knew he loved her or that he had loved her. The more he tried to remember it, the more his head hurt, the more the blurry memories turned red. He didn’t known who this woman who had meant so much to him was. He shoved those letters under the bed and left the room while Sam was sleeping. He need to clear his head, clearly this woman hadn’t meant that much to him if he couldn’t remember her, but he knew it was a lie. He knew she mattered.

The sounds of his shoes against the floor made him forget about her, her the ghost of a woman he loved. He continued to walk, watching the walls surrounding him until a glass wall broke the continuous light blue of the walls. He peeked through it and there it was, the woman he felt he knew in a black suit on pointe. He was hypnotised by the constant plié to on pointe as if it was nothing. Bucky went around, opening the door to watch her more closely.

- How do you do it? - he asked, taking her by surprise. Turning around, she had fear in her eyes as she took a step back, something Bucky was used to. It no longer hurt as it used to. - The feet thing. I ... my sister used to watch ballet and they always did that.

- Oh, uhm ... it’s all about supporting your body weight onto your toes and wearing the right pair of shoes.

- I’m Bucky, by the way ... Uhm, thank you for not killing us.

- I’m Y/N. - she extended her hand to shake his. - Is the room alright? Do you need anything?

- Do you know who Daisy is? Sharon said your father is Pierce so I thou ...

- I don’t. - she interrupted him. - I don’t really know a lot about my father’s private life. I’m sorry.

- You’re too early for ... - Yelena entered the room in tactical gear, stopping once she saw someone other than Y/N. Her eyes searched for Y/N’s who were begging for help. - Fight training. Closed off fight training.

- Right, I ... I was just looking for the kitchen. - he said but was still gazing her eyes

- I’ll take you. - the blonde Russian gave him a tight smile, pointing towards the door and exiting with him.

The air that seemed to have been previously held on her chest came out almost in a wave and she felt herself slide against the mirrored wall until she was sat on the floor, head looking at the tall ceiling as if she were in catatonic state, and maybe she was, she didn’t know. How could she know if whenever he spoke to her all she could hear was that piano, that damned low piano and the mirage of him, the mirage of the life she wanted with him in Westview. She looked at her shoes, worn out, the pink satin which one was shiny new had black worn out spots over where there used to be an embroidered daisy. She was glad it was gone, she was glad it wouldn’t return. Nevertheless, she could still feel her ... Agatha, poking at whatever protected her mind. She could almost hear her calling out to her with promises of all she wanted. They had always gone after her ... the weak link, the one whose will was easy to break. It was no mistake the red room had given her the nickname Daisy out of all flowers they could’ve picked. She was easily broken, manipulated to be a strong fighter but easily broken by those who knew. She wondered if the Red Room was still out looking for her, looking for Yelena ... she wondered what control they still held over her, what control her father had over her. Both knew she was alive, both had tortured her with tapes of ... him. They knew she was alive, it was only a cat and mouse game until they took her away. Their experiment. Their unsuccessful successful experiment.

- God, he’s awfully chattier than I remember. - Yelena walked into the room, eyes lowering to where she was. - Who told you to take a break? Get up and fight me.

- He knows.

- Chill, Y/N. He didn’t even know what a waffle maker was until now. He’s not gonna break through whatever you made Wanda do to him which, by the way, I’m against. - the blonde sat next to her. - You let Monica hand him the letters, of course he’s gonna wonder who Daisy is. Terrible name.

- I’m sorry, Yelena, not everyone had the pleasure of having the code name Hyacinth. - Y/N teased.

- It was a great code name. The best code name.

- No, it wasn’t.

- Want the morning off? I could spar with Monica or Alexei. - Yelena gave her a kind look and an offer she couldn’t refuse. Last thing she wanted to do was to spar with anyone in her mindset. Yelena understood it, her too having dealt with her own trauma inflicted by the Red Room. In times like these, both girls had learned to leave each other alone to cope with whatever demons they had.

Y/N dragged her knees up to her chest like a kid, hair falling in front of her eyes as she fished for the dog tags under her shirt. She ripped them from her neck, letting the old metal tags slide through her fingers. She clenched the memorabilia of past emotions against her chest.

- Yelena said you were gloom. - Wanda walked into the room still in her pyjamas. - Besides your shield is down and your thoughts are loud. You ought to learn to control it someday.

- Well, you seem to love getting in people’s minds.

- Not yours. Whenever I get the particular pleasure of doing it ... - she sat next to her, still in her dressing gown. - You’re either feeling guilty or in such pain. I think it’s time you speak about it.

- She’s still in my mind ... Agatha. She lingers.

- What does she know? She couldn’t even give you an actually accurate mirage of Bucky. Two arms? Please.

- She’s gonna be after us non-stop, Wanda. She will pair forces with Ross to get what she wants and then all of this will be as worthless as it was. With Zemo if she needs too ...

- She can’t get to you, okay? - Wanda gave her a kind smile, the type of smile she gave the twins whenever one of them was sad but this time it didn’t help. She could hear her voice calling out for her, she could see the purple tint in her nightmares and while Monica and Wanda had learned to deal with it, mostly ignoring it, she could fell the witch’s influence in her stronger than ever.

She remained laid against the wall of the training room even after Wanda was gone. She looked at the ceiling, fingers toying around with the humidity in the air making it fall onto the ground like rain. Fitting, she thought. Yet again, whatever she could do always seemed to mirror whatever she thought or felt like. It was past midday when she made her way from the gym to her bedroom to get dressed. She knew better than to leave the hex unaccompanied but what surrounded it was wilderness and she always felt at peace in wilderness, the soft sounds of birds chirping and the water falls always made her forget the screams from the red room, the purple aura from Agatha ... it just didn’t make her forget Bucky. She had always wanted to see him again, to apologise ... to ... she didn’t know what to do, she just knew she got tongue tied whenever she saw him, the guilt eating her alive.

- Well, hello dear. - Y/N turned around, eyes shining white behind her iris as Agatha stood there in her purple peplum dress. - There’s no need for a fight, dear. I just want to talk.

- Well, I don’t ... - she took a fighting stance but the woman merely shrugged.

- I just came to give you a shoulder to cry. Word on the street is that your Bucky is around. Isn’t that wonderful, dear?

- Based on your illusion of him, I’d think you wouldn’t even recognise him.

- You know, you’ll always be my favourite out of the three girls. You and I are very similar, my dear. Besides, I can help you, I know how your powers work and it’s not for cheap tricks. I can help you with him, I know what it is like to have someone take the person who you love the most be taken for you but I can help you, dear. You and me, we can get what we want, what it’s rightfully yours.

- He’s not mine. - she meant her words to come strong, swiftly like the thunderstorm winds yet they faltered, as if they were only now registering in her mind.

- You know, dearest ... the good thing about the soul stone is that it made you who you are. The bad thing is, you’re not gonna be able to control what it gave you if your soul is in disarray. The more your mind battles, the more your ability will take hold of you.

- What do you mean?

- Why do you think Wanda got more powerful when things were falling apart in Westview?

- Y/N! - Monica’s voice made Agatha disappear in a cloud of purple mist. Y/N turned her head to the side to see Monica make her way through the trees, decked out in her fighting outfit. - What are you doing here? You missed the early morning brief and you’re in ... whatever you’re wearing.

- I just needed some time off. - she smiled. - Why are you in battle gear?

- Darcy’s sure one of the books must be in the Red Room ... the one where you were trained. - Monica sighed, less than happy to have to bring Y/N back to that place but if there was someone who could navigate it, it was her. - Yelena was not trained by ... him, so she does not know. Y/N, I don’t think ... I think you and him should talk.

- There’s nothing to talk about. - she forced a smile, following Monica back into the hex. - We are different people, besides ... I don’t think he would forgive me at all.

- Can you at least tell me what happened? What happened with him, what happened in Westview? Wanda says you’re in pain and I don’t want you to be in pain. You helped me when I was in pain, I wanna help you too. We’ve known each other for what? Five years discounting the Thanos thing? Six?

- I will talk about it someday. Just not today.

- Are you in the headspace to go with us? We can always try and see what Sergeant Barnes remembers if you’re not up to it.

- I am a professional agent. - she smiled. - I’m always prepared.

The sooner we get this book situation sorted, the sooner she wouldn’t have to look at him anymore. At least that’s what she thought and as such she had no problem returning to the place which she had escaped from years and years ago. Nevertheless, she was first and foremost an agent, someone who fought for others and for once she had to do just that. Be professional.

She got dressed in her traditional black tactic gear and jacket before heading down to the room where they kept most of their ammunition. It had been Jimmy’s idea to arm everyone involved in a mission just in case despite Y/N, Wanda and Monica being capable to hold their own without it. Even so, having a knife or a gun on them had made wonders before. Normally the people they go against aren’t exactly fair and she had learned that the hard way. As she opened the door to the ammunition room, she came face to face with him lacing up his boots. It was the most common action yet it felt so foreign to see him do it, to see him be in control of lacing up his own shoe laces. Part of her was happy for him, happy he was happy, happy he was his own person but the other part of her screamed for her to let it go of her insecurities, he was not the same man she had known and she was definitely not the same woman. She was guilty for more than half his pain and that, that remained the same.

Y/N ignored him, sliding past him to grab her own utility belt which was really nothing special except for the fact she had gotten everyone important in her life to carve their initials in them. Her point was if she was dying on the field, she had least had something which reminded her of the love which regardless of every bad thing she had done, still remained. She wrapped her belt around her waist and thigh, yet nevertheless it was still too loose. Damned belt.

- You’re putting it wrong. - Buck mumbled.

- Pardon?

- The belt. - he got up and walked up to her. - The second strap ... it’s too low on your thigh, should be higher.

- Oh ... - she moved her gaze away from him.

- Here. May I? - he asked her, hoping to meet her gaze but she merely nodded still looking the other way. Bucky unclasped the strap from her thigh, bringing it up further up, his knuckles brushing against the fabric of her trousers. She slowly moved her gaze to look at him and he fixed her belt before he moved up, eyes staring into hers. They seemed to look at each other for a lifetime, before he cleared his throat. - It should be better now.

- Uhm ... thank you, Sergeant Barnes.

- Cyborg brain, how long does it take to lace up some boots? - Sam’s voice reverberated through the room making the two take each a step back going back to the distance between them.

- I have to go. - Y/N grabbed her jacket, exiting the room as fast as she could.

The plane ride was equally unbearable with her sat in front of him, catching his eyes every once in a while. God, she used to love his eyes. She still remembered being tangled in grey worn out sheets, laying across his chest just looking at him, looking at those eyes which always looked the same even when he forgot her. Those blue eyes, they were always the same despite the two of them being different people from who they were in the Red Room. Speaking of the devil, it no longer looked like one. It was falling down, the once crown jewel of HYDRA had worn out with time. The red walls were fading to brown, the spotless rooms were now filled with dust and ghosts of memories. It was gone, so how come it still haunted her?

- Wanda and Sharon will take east, me and Sam west, Alexei and Yelena south and Y/N you can take north with Sergeant Barnes. - Monica suggested. Y/N shot her a way too familiar look, almost as if she were about to argue with her yet she understood the basis of her decision. After all, not everyone had ... a something controlling power.

She took charge into the very familiar north wing of the building. They kept most off the girls who were yet to pass to the red room there and it had been her home for years. Bucky however, was remembering things which he couldn’t fully understand. He knew this place yet he didn’t remember walking these halls, he remembered the pain. He could still feel the pain, the much too familiar pain of having all he knew be gone.

- You’ll take the right and I the left? Sergeant Barnes? - she put her hand on his hand, almost magically taking him away from ghosts of his pain. - Do you want to stop?

- Yeah, I’ll take the left. - he rebuffed her, turning left.

The room seemed to take him in, memories of his own strained voice as he yelled out for some mercy returned to his consciousness, memories of things he had said, things he hadn’t said. He swiftly turned around, turning his gun to the door before turning back again to see a woman standing in front of him.

- Woah lower the gun down, dear. - she had an eerily smile on her lips. Buck took a step back slowly but she moved her hand, a purple glow followed by the sound of the door closing. - I’m only here to help.

- Y/N ... - he tapped his intercom but no sound came from it.

- Yes, that’s exactly who we are talking about. You see I know who Daisy is, she knows who Daisy is. - she took a file from under her shirt. - Everyone knows who Daisy is but you. Now, I think it’s really unfair you don’t know so I decided to even out the game.

She threw the file onto the ground before disappearing. God, at least back in the 40s people only removed their faces. Bucky looked around, wearingly of his surroundings much more than he was before. This room. was playing with his mind yet the file laying on the ground proved the woman wasn’t a mere mirage of his mind. He kneeled down too grab the file, opening it to reveal a passport photo of Y/N accompanied by an information sheet. He read through the first lines quickly until one particular fact stopped him. Known aliases: Daisy.

taglist: @lookiamtrying

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amberwild420 · 3 years

Text

one step back, two steps forward (pt. 21)

masterlist

the secrets came to light 1

The ‘click-clack’ of the metal boots was heard before a raging female came in the view. The heroes of different ages sitting around the conference table watched with a batted breath as she entered and stomped right towards the glow stick of the league.

Hal was having a good day, there was no pending mission of the league or ova and he had a rare free time to himself. That was until the raging Amazonian came.

With her fist directly to his gut, the chaos started. Red hood couldn’t hide and burst out laughing at the neon glow stick. Some younger heroes also laughed although trying to cover it up with coughs.

Wonder woman looked down at the green lantern with a growl. She couldn’t believe when she had a conversation about the continuously ignored situation, with something so sacred in the circulation. And the fault was on their side.

How could you do this!? How could you ignore them?! I knew you were idiot but I didn’t knew you were this stupid! To think you ruled them out as mere prank call!

Now, they all turned serious. It looked like that Hal had received a call to justice league headquarters and ruled it as prank call when the call was serious and now the Amazonian was raging.

Wonder woman….

Batman called making the said hero calm though barely. Without a word he asked for clarification.

Yesterday I received a call about Paris situation……………

Wait….. Hal straighten up, suddenly remembering the event. ……..you mean to say that call about bunch of magic jewelry, kids dressed up in animal costumes and evil butterfly…………that was all true!

Yes Hal! Diana hissed, her poorly disguised glare was enough to shut him up.

Someone from the younger heroes raised their hand. Beast boy gestured towards green lantern.

You know, the way he put it, it did seem like a bunch of non-sense.

Diana face-palmed loudly before groaning. She questioned her sanity before looking at them.

It’s because it was not properly narrated. The first call was four years ago. When it all started. The kids were chosen out of whim and they had to learn it on their own. Now I got a call from the new member with new problems that I feel like I should tear my hair out!

Wonder woman panted as tried to catch her breath.

Excuse me, I’m emotionally distorted.

Hey, what was the magic jewelry again?

Aquaman asked slowly.

Miraculous.

Holy shit! Yeah, you messed up Hal!

Aquaman cursed as he took Diana’s side making other leaguers raise an eyebrow.

We would like some explanation if you want us to help.

Batman growled as he stared at the Atlantian and Amazonian. They looked at each other before sighing again.

Alright. But first you need to know the origin considering you don’t know the importance of such sacred artifact. Diana begins. Well, miraculous are magical jewelry bounded with tiny gods to sustain their existence. We call these gods Kwami. Kwamis have existed since the beginning of the universe. Being abstract creatures, each Kwami is formed whenever a new idea, concept, or emotion comes into existence in the universe, such as creation, destruction, balance etc. However, tangible creatures, like humans, could not see or sense a Kwami; so the Kwamis could only roam the universe without communicating with them.

That was until a mage successfully made magic jewelry where Kwami inhibit and communicate with humans. Arthur continued. We call them miraculous. By inhibiting them, these tiny gods bestow their power to their wearers.

Among many the strongest are the creation and destruction. Using them both gives you one wish regardless of what it is. You can ask for peace or to bring someone to life or overwrite a timeline if you want.

Many speedsters perked up but their next words send chills to their bodies.

That is if you are will to pay the equal price. Ask to resurrect the dead one and you might lose your loved ones.

That what sank Atlantis.

And the world war……

The great draught…..

Pompeii…..

……..

…..

There was utter silence before wonder woman started again.

Considering you guys have been reading it as natural disaster and human greed started a war, it was just a cover up so the existence of such sacred artifacts remain hidden. If it falls to wrong hands, it will goodbye lives and hello destructions.

There was pin drop silence, many looked uneasy as they tried to digest the information.

So now they are in Paris?

Normally they should be with the order of the guardians, but if what I was told correct then the order had fallen and only one guardian remains…………….

Is there a problem?

Yes……….because now the guardian is 17 years old child who is also wielding miraculous of creation.

There was another dramatic silence before all chaos started.

What do you mean 17 years old?! Do you mean they were 13 when they all started!

This is non-sense father! Those kids have their own city and I can’t patrol without any supervisor!

Holy fuck! Those were kids! Who the hell chose children with no training to be heroes!

I think you forgot baby bird, this is exactly B took us in.

They can change timeline!

The chaos stopped when batman cleared his throat.

Should we offer our help to them?

Batman asked wonder woman who quickly shook her head.

While it might be the right thing to do it isn’t the right choice. The enemy pry on the negative emotions to mind control you.

So it’s better to gather information instead.

How about I show you the calls we get first?

Wonder woman asked before turning towards the main computer.

#miraculous ladybug #One Step Back #two steps forward #justice league #wonder woman is angry #batman is scary #miraculous

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timextoxhajima · 3 years

Text

GEN Z SERIES, HYUNJAE: The Third Eye

"Will you choose to believe what you see or what you feel?”

Member: Hyunjae

Genre: Fantasy / Slice of Life / Supernatural / Angst / TW

Trigger Warnings: Rape, Self-Harm

Word Count: 5.8k

Taglist: @yn-am-pm @fleurseoul @sunwoowuvbot

The first time I knew I saw something that wasn't there, I was scared. How was an eight-year-old supposed to treat an elderly man who looked closer to a skeleton than a human being standing in the corner of the room... of an elderly's home?

I remember my mother combing my grandmother's hair while my father was helping me pick up my crayons off the floor when I saw him. Nurses were walking down the corridors in a hurry. I remember nobody noticed -- or at least, unlike the conventional way of death that has been portrayed in movies and books by the very cliché usage of the flatlining on the monitor. He had a good amount of hair for an old man in his nineties.

Then again, it might've been his deteriorating health that made him look older than he actually was when he died. Time seemed to pass a lot slower when they let me see them. Unlike the way his skin seemed to sink in between his ribs and wrap around the bones of his arms, his eyes were full of light. The kind that I recognised when I was at school. I didn't know then, because I was just a child he realised could see his soul. But I will never forget the blessing he placed on the top of my head. Every single word etched into my mind like carved into stone.

I told my grandmother about the man I saw earlier that day when my parents went to talk to the nurses of the elderly home. She was scared at first, when she realised her grandchild had abilities that not many had. Yet, she never told my parents, because she knew they would convince themselves that they could do something about it -- as if one could really remove the powers of a third eye all so easily.

Angels are not beings with wings or halos but instead, a bright orb of gold and white. The old man waved so dearly to me, after giving his children and grandchildren a kiss atop their heads though they couldn't feel it. He was 88, auspicious numbers in many cultures. Then when the orb of light drifted in through the window, I remember I could almost hear the sounds of kittens and puppies. But just as it neared him, I heard the familiar sounds of laughter from his children and grandchildren, then static sounds of radio and music I didn't recognise. I will later find out that the music belonged in the 40s.

The orb presents you with everything you've loved and enjoyed and held close to your heart in your life, and should you be content with what the orb has to offer you, then it must be time for you to go.

But where there is light, there is darkness. Where there are orbs of smiles and flowers, there are daggers of blood and evil lurking in the shadows. I was 13 when I saw evil in one of its many forms. I had a headache the entire day, a sign to tell me that my third eye is in close proximity with something that did not align with my believes and morals.

I had expected something to jump out at me through the reflection off the mirror, or a hand to burst through the ground and grab me by the ankle. But no, evil in one of its many forms does not need it to be horrifying and scary.

Her hair was long, and her face was covered in what looked like burn marks.

Does Hell burn through you so quickly?

She looks human, but her fingers were split down the middle, thorns sticking out every finger, in which on each hand she has ten.

As she graced the corridors of school, she sheds these thorns that drop like nails to the floor, waiting for someone to step on those facing upwards. Have you ever gotten a sharp ache or pinch in the soles of your feet when you're walking sometimes?

If you have, then you would've probably stepped on a Hell's Thorn, or at least, that's what I called it. I never found out if she could see me, but when I realised I could touch the thorns and kick them out of sight, they'd roll off into some corner before dissolving into red ash.

Over a decade of being stuck between two worlds. I've done enough reading to understand the dangers of prancing along this line, not being able to shut one side off completely. So, when the ghosts, demons and spirits hide in the shadows of my room, or stare at me point-blank in the middle of the day like a normal human being would, it becomes normal.

They are everywhere, even when you cannot feel them. It gets confusing, when they look more human than some human beings.

Just how much longer... or how much more can I stay like this?

"I don't know where your diary is. If you're telling me it's here, then I'm telling you it's gone."

You are standing right smack in the middle of the school field, afternoon sun beaming down onto your hair. Squinting your eyes, you look around the large space of artificial grass and beyond that, the tracks, where students were finding some fun in running laps in the summer heat.

"But..."

"Lee Eun," Your heart breaks, more than necessary, because this is not the first time you've done it. "What you're looking for isn't here. The building your locker was in was torn down 20 years ago and if it was there, it's gone now. Or at least..." She watches you turn around and stare at the ground beneath your feet. "It's not here anymore."

Lee Eun was a student from your school that graduated in 2000. But she lost her life the day she graduated, only because she hadn't seen the brick falling from the nearby construction site where the school building you attended now was being built.

The silence becomes unbearable so you look up, but you only see the two male students jogging along the track and nobody else in sight. The orb did not come to collect Lee Eun's soul; this is not over.

The sweat has stuck your uniform to your back when you return to class, and it becomes apparent to you that a particular shadow has not shifted an inch since you've stepped into the classroom. You weren't in pain, so this entity is not a demon. Yet, you cannot identify its gender. It had no face, no hair, just... a volume of shadow and darkness and if the girls sitting before it knew it was there, they'd probably scream their head off.

You know its staring at you with every intention in its spirit, though you cannot see its eyes. And it stays when the teacher enters the classroom with a new student trailing behind him. For a moment, your attention is diverted to Jang Jun Hyuk, hair brown and skin fair. The girls in the class were already ogling over him, it's not a surprise anymore. But the shadow turns to look at him, then at you, and the darkness dissolves into the beige wall behind it, vanishing as Jang Jun Hyuk bows and introduces himself.

Then the king of the class speaks at a volume you know you weren't supposed to hear, but consider it a special talent now that you've honed the skills of your third eye.

"Strange vibes," Lee Hyunjae was probably talking to Younghoon. "Don't you think there's something off about him?"

"Are you sure you're not just threatened that there's someone who rivals our popularity?"

Jang Jun Hyuk bows to the class, then is instructed by the teacher to take a seat diagonally behind you, right in front of Lee Hyunjae.

"Hey, new kid."

A frown gently presses itself into your forehead when you can hear Younghoon give Hyunjae a gentle whack on his shoulder.

"Where did you move from?"

"Ah, I moved from another city. My father was transferred."

The shadow was now standing by the door of the classroom, watching the teacher scribble on the whiteboard.

"Cool," Hyunjae offers a friendly laugh. That's more like him. "Join us at lunch, provided you don't have a crowd to hang out with yet."

“Uh, sure.”

The shadow turns to look at you -- even without eyes, you know it’s watching you.

By the time you have been dragged to the cafeteria by your friends (though most people tend to think you’re weird for talking to yourself sometimes), Hyunjae has doubled over on some bench cracking up at a joke Jun Hyuk made.

Your friends can’t help but to draw your attention to the new addition to the group of popular males.

“Man fits right in, doesn’t he?”

“At least he looks like one of them.”

“y/n,” One of the two call out to you. “What happened to... what was her name?”

“Lee Eun.”

“Right, the ghost from twenty years ago. How is she?”

The two look at you with wide, glistening eyes. Most people aren’t as accommodating to your abilities, so it’s a blessing to have them by your side.

“I haven’t seen her since earlier today. She said she had a diary in school but she never found it.”

“Well, maybe it is still in school somewhere, locked up in some lost and found box or lost in some locker. Why else would she still be here and can’t... you know, move on?”

You shrug. I wish I knew.

The library was always comforting. The silence, the sound of pages being flipped and the occasional clicking of someone’s keyboard. And strangely enough, the library’s never really a hotspot for other beings except humans.

The peace was, unfortunately, disrupted though, when Jun Hyuk shows up with his backpack and tie neat around his collar. You greet him subtly before returning to your notes, but he sits down opposite you and renders your desire to be alone useless.

“Hyunjae and Younghoon told me you would be here.”

The pen in your grip gets lowered into the ivory sheets, gaze travelling up to look at him through your lashes. “Lee Hyunjae and Kim Younghoon? Why would they tell you where I am?”

Jun Hyuk offers a shy smile, diverting his brown irises away from you for a second. “Because I asked.”

The cold air stings your nose when you suck in a deep breath. “Why, do you need help with work? Because I’m literally the worst person to ask--”

“No, I just needed to know where I could find you so I could spend time with you.”

Your heart begins to thump madly, because it’s not everyday that a guy is so straightforward with his intentions to someone he just met.

“Uh--” You purse your lips in a bid to form a coherent sentence. “That’s really... honest of you.”

Jun Hyuk grins sweetly, eyes halving into crescents and creasing his skin around his lids. He has a dimple in his left cheek, a detail that you wouldn’t have noticed if he wasn’t sitting directly opposite you.

“So, can I?”

Confusion strikes you, only because assumption is a dangerous thing we like to do.

“Can you... what?”

“Hang out with you.”

The whir of the air-conditioner in the library becomes a little louder alongside the thumping that was now difficult to ignore in your head.

The blood rushes up to your cheeks and you can feel your face catching fire, so Jun Hyuk eases it by restarting a conversation.

“Anyway, have you done the work from today?”

“I--” You look down at the worksheet he was taking out from his bag. It’s barely filled. “I’ve been staring at it for awhile now--”

“Not good at Math?”

“I’m better at...” Jun Hyuk takes the worksheet and gets up, scooting over to the seat next to you. A gulp finds a way down your throat. “...English and Literature...”

“Well, it’s your lucky day because I’m great at Math.”

Up close, Jin Hyuk smells like fresh linen.

Not a great sign. He knows what makes a girl tick.

Jun Hyuk spends the rest of the afternoon helping you with the worksheet, and the glimmer in his eyes...

“Are you listening?”

Your jaw slacks in surprise, blinking your attention away from staring at him. A chuckle sounds from Jun Hyuk, who looks away with the slightest hint of pride.

Jun Hyuk makes you feel like you are prancing on clouds for the next few weeks. The little notes he passed in class that earned the attention of his new friends, Younghoon and Hyunjae. The sweets and treats that he’d leave on your desk before school and the after-school study sessions were your favourite part of the day.

He’d expected you to be calm and collected when he took the initiative to hold your hand under the table, but he could read how nervous and anxious you got, so he thinks it’s a good idea to ease that anxiety with a kiss on your cheek.

Lee Eun was no longer around to ask you for her diary, but the faceless shadow was still tailing you when you were in the classroom. It’s never interfered with your daily routine though, thus you choose to leave it be and enjoy being a normal teenager for once.

Three months after you met Jun Hyuk though, you could tell Hyunjae was deliberately steering away from him, dragging Younghoon along with him. You can’t help but wonder if it was because you and Jun Hyuk were now romantically involved and that Hyunjae had probably caught wind of the fact that you could see things that weren’t there, leading him to ostracise Jun Hyuk.

Not that it had that much effect anyway, Jun Hyuk was a charming boy on his own; he didn’t need Hyunjae’s help to ‘make it’ in school.

The day carries on as per usual with Jun Hyuk staying in school to study with you. Hands busy scribbling away and eyes darting across worksheets, you’ve always admired how focussed he gets when he does his work.

In attempt to pull him out of his stress-bubble, you cap on your pen and lean into him, resting your head on his shoulder after making sure there was nobody else left in the library.

“Do you want to take a break? You’ve been going at it for quite some time now.”

“I’m just about there, just hold on a minute, would you?”

A pout surfaces on your lips. “I know. I just... do you ever feel bad that Hyunjae and Younghoon aren’t as close to you as before?”

Jun Hyuk finishes the line he’s writing and looks up at you. “Why would I?”

“I don’t know, I just... you must’ve heard the rumor that I can see ghosts. Aren’t you upset that they might be leaving you out because of that?”

“You can see ghosts?” He scoffs. His attitude feels strange today, though he hasn’t said anything wrong. “That’s just stupid. And no, I don’t really care.”

“Oh,” A pause halts you, so you can think of an appropriate response. “You don’t... believe in ghosts or spirits?”

“No, that stuff is for kids.”

The thought of Jun Hyuk not believing in something you were known to be able to see was strangely more discomforting than not.

“Why’d you ask about Hyunjae and Younghoon? I thought you weren’t close with those guys?” He’s placing his pens into his pencil case and keeping his worksheets in his file. You start doing the same.

“I-- I’m not, I’m just asking for your sake.”

“My sake?” He clears the table of his items and leans back in his seat. “Why would it bother me? Is it because you don’t get to talk to them anymore?”

“What? Why would that matter to me?”

“I don’t know, you were pretty smitten with Hyunjae just a few weeks ago.”

“Since when?”

“You think I didn’t notice when you were smiling at him when he was making those jokes-- they weren’t even that funny?”

A frown has finally cemented itself between your brows. “I’m sorry, where is this jealousy even coming from? Why didn’t you just tell me when you saw it?”

Jun Hyuk goes silent, and you can tell he’s upset just by thinking about it. Sighing, you rest your head on his shoulder again in a bid to appease his anger.

“Alright, I’m sorry, okay? I was just concerned that you might feel left out or anything. And rest assured, I wasn’t flirting with Hyunjae.”

Jun Hyuk hums in response, reaching your chin to pull you closer. Your heart starts to pound in your ear when he doesn’t hesitate to press his lips against yours, the sudden intimacy catching you off-guard and sending chills down your spine.

Something doesn’t feel right.

“Jun--” You manage to cough out, just as he starts to bury his nose and lips into your neck. “Jun Hyuk, not here.”

“Come on, there’s nobody here. Isn’t it exciting?” He smirks into your skin but it makes you feel dirty.

“Jun, we really shouldn’t. I’m tired today so...” Gently pushing him off, his eyes are now filled with the ache of rejection. Somewhere inside you, you hope that he understands. But you also hope he knows he’s being an asshole.

“I... I think I’m going to go,” Backing away, you can hear your heart in your ears as you reverse, returning to the table to clear your stationery. His footsteps come dangerously close behind you before you are yanked around violently, each of your elbows coming into tight restraint in his palms.

“Where do you think you’re going?”

“I’m going home,” When your eyes meet his, they are dark under the lighting. And even then, it seems like the man you trusted had turned to dust and blown away in the wind. “Please, let me go.”

“But don’t you trust me? Didn’t you say that you didn’t know what you’d do without me?” It’s horrifying when his nose comes dangerously closely to yours, his lips that were once part of a daydream now slowly being torn to shreds, forming an idea of a nightmare in your mind.

If you could feel darkness, you were sure you could hurl out nothing but black masses, when he aggressively pastes his lips to yours. There’s a stark difference being in love and being trustworthy... and being this person who was cutting off the blood supply from your face to your mouth now.

“Let me go, please!” Your strength is rendered useless in his tight grip around your wrists, and now he decides to shift his tongue to your neck, harshly sucking on the skin and flesh and making you want to hurl and sob instead. The struggle you offered was of no use to Jun Hyuk, not when he is able to shove you backwards and plaster your back to the study desk with all your pens and pencils under your back.

“Do you know what you’re getting yourself into?!”

“You should’ve thought about that before you kissed me first in the garden the other day, no?”

The tears finally stream when the betrayal sets in. Not even prayers would work anymore, would they?

Using his upper body weight to hold you to the table, the metal clinking of his belt comes like a warning when you can feel the tears wetting the strands of your hair.

“Jun Hyuk, please...”

“Shut up,” Ice cold fingers run up the length of your thighs and around your hips under your skirt, scratching your skin as he removes your underwear. “Isn’t this how much you trust me?”

Sobs run through gritted teeth as your chin tilts to the ceiling, his body absorbing every ounce of struggle and force you were exerting on him. But, it was so easily drained into him that you were gradually turning limp and lifeless. Hearing him undo his zipper while he wets and marks your skin with his tongue and teeth shuts off all your senses. Your eyes flutter shut with resignation, the shivering and trembling seeping away with your need to escape.

Help me.

Something fuses loudly. The lights go off.

“Who’s there?! Motherfucker!”

The zip goes back up, and the weight on you shifts away.

“I’m going to kill you!”

His voice wears away, getting softer with his footsteps.

Still crying, you pull up your underwear that was dangling at your ankles and push yourself off the surface of the table. Everything on the desk gets swept into your back before you stumble out of the secluded study area, the light of the late sunset greeting your tear stained face.

Reaching home feels like reaching the end point in a marathon, just that instead of feeling pride and glory, you were feeling nothing but worthlessness.

The lukewarm water feels like a gentle hug around your body when you sink into the cold marble, knees propped up and surfaced with your feet flat against the base of the bathtub.

Swollen eyes from crying but too tired to cry somemore, and you find difficulty in even remembering why you even fell for Jun Hyuk in the first place.

It was my fault for bringing it up. I shouldn’t have brought it up.

Maybe if I didn’t have this gift then I didn’t need to ask or worry about Jun Hyuk being ostracised. Maybe it shouldn’t be called a gift after all.

This pain is temporary, right? This small blade can do more than ease the pain. This blood that colors the water can do more than dry the tears from my eyes.

I wish I wasn’t born with this gift.

You close your eyes and let yourself sink into the tub, under the surface of the water. The water starts to feel thicker, and before you can count to five, it starts going up your nose.

But then it feels like you’ve been sucked into another dimension and thrown back onto your bed when you gasp, sitting up and choking out what feels like water in your throat.

Your hands fumble around yourself, and you wince when you look down at your wrists. The vertical cut looked more like a scar that’s already healed, rather than an injury you had chosen to inflict on yourself just hours before.

The clock strikes 3.33am, and while you would usually be kind of freaked out because 3 is not an auspicious number, you can’t help but to feel some kind of relief when you realised you were still alive.

The next few days you spend in the shadows. Jun Hyuk tries to apologise to you on more than one occasion, but when you glitch and nearly break down when he gets anywhere near you, your friends start to understand that something had happened.

Why would you want to take your life all of a sudden?

Mr. Shadowman doesn’t leave you alone though. Instead, it starts following you more aggressively, showing up in the strangest of places and in the most horrendous positions. You had seen it standing with its feet planted to the ceiling of the cafeteria, then again standing perfectly still behind the classroom door when the teacher closed it.

Then it finally follows you into the bathroom after school. You’ve changed your studying location to your classroom, so you wouldn’t need to worry about being alone.

But no matter how many times you see this shadow, seeing it curled up under the sink in the female’s toilet makes you yelp and jump backwards, not even enticing a reaction from it.

“You...” Gripping the edge of the sink, you squat and stare at it. “What do you need from me?”

“I wouldn’t go anywhere nearer to it if I were you.” Your eyes dart up into the broken glass above the sink. Seeing Hyunjae staring at you through the reflection, with the pillar hiding the rest of his body was surprising.

It dawns on you that whatever you were seeing, Hyunjae could see it too.

The shadow remained still under the sink, crouched into a mass like someone holding its knees to its chest. The water dripping from under the sink slips through the mass like it wasn’t there. Hyunjae spares you a few seconds to stare at it some more until he grabs your arm and pulls you out of the toilet.

“What the-- don’t touch me--” Yanking your wrist out of his hands, you jerk away from him. The impact pulls your sleeves upwards, revealing the bruises that Jun Hyuk had left on you just a few days ago -- and the scar of the cut down your forearm.

His attention is stolen by the marks, cuing you to nervously pull your sleeves back down as you steal a glance at Hyunjae’s face.

“Don’t interact with that thing,” He advises after a few moments of silence. “It’s been following you.”

Looking up with a harsh frown on your face, confusion and anger starts to seep through your bones.

“You mean to tell me you could see these things all this while?”

Hyunjae’s eyes fill with a tiny pinch of guilt, but he doesn’t look away.

“That thing is harmless,” Your thumb brushes across the area where the bruise was hidden under the material of your sleeve. “It saved me.”

“If it’s harmless or any bit human then why doesn’t it have a face? Or eyes or hair or a mouth?”

“So, you can’t see what it is either. Have you seen others? Ghosts, the angel orbs, demons--”

“Get this clear in your head, I am not here to discuss what you can see,” Hyunjae takes a step closer and looks at you with an expression you can’t read. Was he angry? Frustrated? Worried? Concerned?

“But do not engage with whatever that is. They only stick around if you entertain it, and right now, you are just short of becoming friends with it.”

“You make it sound like you know everything about that other world.”

“And you make it sound like you haven’t seen a demon and that there are no dangers of it.”

The proximity starts to make you anxious; his build is similar to Jun Hyuk’s and the physical confrontation starts to knock on your skull is all the ways possible. Hyunjae retreats when he notices your eyes are unable to meet his now, and he walks away with his fists clenched.

That night, you are unable to fall asleep. Not with the new revelation that Hyunjae can see the same things you do. Or was it just the shadow that he can see?

Has he seen the orbs or angels or demons?

You sit up in your bed, eyes adjusting to the darkness when a thud wakes you up. The crickets outside are loud in the silent night, but it takes you just a split second to recognise the shadow standing in the corner where the door meets the corner of the room.

Keeping your eyes peeled, you fumble around at your nightstand, searching for the button of the lamp. It doesn’t disappear though, when the amber light illuminates the cream-pink room.

“What do you need?” The query comes out more like a whisper, because most spirits you meet are ghosts who need your help or are willing to talk to you -- most of them have faces and eyes and have some resemblance to being human at some point of time in their life.

The shadow pulls itself off the wall, and turns from a flat, regular shadow into a mass of darkness; the same way it was in the classroom when you first saw it, then later under the sink in the bathroom.

This is the first time this has happened -- a shadow that was very obviously a being and yet you cannot decide if it was something harmful or something that once walked the Earth.

By now, the shadow is just about two metres away from your bed, yet you find yourself inching backwards because you cannot predict what it would (or could) do to you.

Then it lifts an arm that reaches out to you, darkness flowing like steam off its limbs as it gets closer to you. But just before it can touch you, a flash of brightness interrupts your interaction.

“Stop.”

Your room is brightly lit up for a split second, blinding you from seeing the shadow. So when your eyes come back into focus, your eyes are about to fall out of your skull when you recognise the back of someone you know.

Hyunjae was standing right next to your bed, between you and the shadow, now visibly a physical blob of darkness.

“You have no business here with her. You don’t even need to be here.”

Silence.

Hyunjae looks at the shadow intently. He is listening to it talk to him, but you hear nothing but the crickets chirping outside.

“Jang Jun Hyuk will be mine to deal with, not yours. You do not need to be here.”

Lee Hyunjae... just what are you?

“Seer but is she a...”

“What did you just say?” You blurt out when the strange croak gets to your head. Hyunjae flinches and turns around to look at you, eyes flickering with worry before turning back to the shadow.

Now, you can see blue orbs for eyes and skin pulled and stretched like it had been worn out through hundreds of years. It was neither a ghost nor human.

It didn’t look like Lee Eun or the elderly man you saw when you were 8, nor did it look like the female demon you saw at 13.

“Leave, you do not belong here.”

“To deserves she know.”

“Know what?” Impatience and fear was getting the better of you, and if Hyunjae was more than human, he would know. “...That I can see you?”

“No, she cannot know!” Hyunjae tries to block you from the ghoul. “That is not your place to tell her!”

The ghoul proves more powerful than Hyunjae and reaches right through him, creating a bright outline of his limb through Hyunjae’s chest.

“No!”

That was the last thing you hear just as the shadow touches your forehead, snapping your neck backwards and sending your memory into a dimension you cannot recognise.

“You will be blessed with eternal protection.”

That was the blessing the elderly man offered you when you were eight. Little did you know that he was merely reading a blessing pinned to your existence on its own.

"The son of Saint Michael had fallen in love with the fairy of the mortals. Saint Michael hadn’t offered the tiniest bit of worry or concern over his son becoming star-crossed lovers. Angels were meant to be with angels and fairies with fairies... Granted that even if you did know about his son’s feelings, you would eventually realise that it was against the laws of the world, for you were a gateway for the Good to seep into the mortal world. But what Saint Michael did not know was that the fairy his son had fallen in love with had stored the same amount of love he had for her in his heart.”

“The Heavens forbid star-crossed lovers between the two breeds of beings. Saint Michael himself couldn’t believe it when his son caved into his feelings right after you did. Fairies were fickle-minded; the only beings of the world of immortals that once walked the Earth as human beings. It was expected that you would provide the same love to the Archangel’s son -- but when he decided to embrace you in his all-gold halo of light... Saint Michael knew he could not afford losing the bearings of his son. He had decided that mortalising you would be a smart decision; keeping you close by letting you protect your ability to connect with this world but restraining you from ever returning to Hyunjae’s side.”

“Yet, like mortals, even immortal beings are unable to fight the strength of love. Hyunjae had decided descend to the world of the Humans and Mortals... to protect you by your side in your second life, allowing you to see him, touch him.”

The day you were reborn was the day Hyunjae had decided to humanise himself, albeit the process was draining and set him on a ticking clock from returning to the other world.

The ghoul looks at you, his blue eyes now revealing himself as a fairy who had disguised himself, in a bid to warn you before you had sold your heart to Hyunjae, something you cannot be with.

“You are paying the price for a fault that was his, do you not bear any resentment?”

The memories return. Flashes of Hyunjae smiling at you because he knew you could see him. The kisses that stained his skin because you were a mere mortal with abilities, and he was a being that was meant for more.

“How is this his fault?”

The fairy is silent, thinking of the words to say.

“Had he lived up to the responsibilities of being the son of Saint Michael, he wouldn’t have caved in.”

Your hair feels light around your shoulders, watching the fairy slowly morph into something less ambiguous.

“What would have happened if we didn’t fall in love in my first life?”

The fairy had grown wings that looks like glass, reflecting light into seven colors into the abyss beyond you. He looks at you, blue eyes never faltering.

“You would’ve become an Undine Fairy, and Hyunjae would’ve had to return to the world of the Skies--”

“And I would never see him again.”

He can see that you’ve had a glimpse into your past life; the forbidden love you had for Hyunjae now buried deep inside you. It feels like someone had just stuck a shovel 6 feet into your heart and dug out every remnant he could find.

“Would you have let him go, had he been true to his existence and you had become an Undine?”

“There’s no way I can answer that, can I?”

The fairy blinks and starts walking backwards. “The rules between the two Worlds are forged in stone, but everybody knows that the matters of the spirit and soul cannot be bound by tangible logic. Your choice depends on what you believe: will you choose to believe what you see or what you feel?”

The question echoes inside your head, and the world around you flashes brightly like you had just died and walked into heaven.

Your consciousness returns to current time, eyes fluttering open as your alarm clock rings you awake. Sitting opposite you, eyes closed as you watch him snoozing lightly despite sitting in a chair, you feel a pinch in your chest.

It’s not his fault, and never will be.

#hyunjae imagines #the boyz #the boyz hyunjae #hyunjae #the boyz imagines #the boyz fanfic #the boyz scenario #tbz imagines

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schrijverr · 3 years

Text

'Till Death Do Us Part

Part 1 out of 13

When Alex has to bring Philip to work, he and Thomas discover that they both have something in common: they lost their love. They form an unexpected bond and connection about this that grows into something more.

A medium burn with parental feelings about Philip and flowers.

On AO3.

Ships: Jamilton

Warnings: mentions of grief and death

~~~~~~~~~~~~

Chapter 1: Canterbury Bell Means ‘Acknowledging’

Alex ran a hand through his hair as he thought of who to call. Philip’s teacher had just called that today school would be canceled due to a mishap yesterday, but his usual babysitter wasn’t available on such short notice.

Maria and Eliza would usually be up to babysit, but they were away on their honeymoon, Angelica worked with him, so she was out, Laf was in France and Herc had that fashion show. He cursed, then looked at Philip to check if he’d heard.

Philip was oblivious. The five-year-old was happily munching on soggy cereal as he watched some kids show.

He was a well behaved sweet child.

Alex smiled and watched his son. It ached how much he looked like John with his freckles and little curls and in moments like these he wished the other was still there, so he wouldn’t have to deal with everything on his own.

“What are we doing today, Papa?” Philip asked.

“I’m going to work, do you want to come with me?” Alex made up his mind, he was sure Washington wouldn’t mind seeing Philip again and he knew Philip would be on his best behavior in the office.

“Yeah!” Philip cheered happily, starting to munch on his food slightly faster.

Alex chuckled at the sight, before sending Angelica a message of why he would be slightly late and who he would have with him.

Then it was bustling through getting the sock on the right foot and the shoes on, making sure Philip’s jacket was on correctly and his shirt not inside out, before almost forgetting his keys as they made their way out the door.

It was the first time since John’s death that Alex was late to work. It was only a few minutes, but it was more noticeable since he was usually way too early.

With Philip on his hip he rushed to his office where an email informed him that the meeting of the afternoon was rescheduled for now, but he could still make it if he hurried.

“Should we go see Grandpa George? Would you like that buddy?” he asked Philip.

He grinned as the boy’s eyes lit up and he bounced so much, he almost fell out of Alex’s arms as he chuckled: “Okay, okay, let’s go.”

Alex opened the door with an apologetic grin as he said: “I’m sorry, the morning was a bit hectic, I just got in.”

Philip wiggled out of his arms and ran to Washington, who caught the boy easily as he assured Alex: “It’s alright, son. Angelica told me already.”

With a sigh of relief Alex set his stuff down, not even bothering to correct Washington about the moniker, before calling Philip over to him and explaining: “I have to do boring work now, but I have some paper and pencils for you, so that you can color. Does that sound fun, Pip? Will you tell me if you need to pee?”

“Yes, Papa,” Philip promised, taking the coloring materials and settling down in Alex’s lap peacefully.

The love he had of drawing was something he shared with his Daddy and Alex always choked up slightly when he saw that concentrated face and the pencil. He was quickly distracted, however, by a certain Virginian saying something stupid and he mostly forgot about Philip in his lap as the meeting progressed.

About an hour into the meeting, Philip pulled on Alex’s jacket and whispered: “Papa, I have to go pee.”

Alex cut himself off mid sentence and smiled down at the boy: “I’m sure, Grandpa George wouldn’t mind if we take a small break to go pee. You hungry, Pip?”

“A bit,” Philip confessed.

“Well, then it’s a good thing, I have a little snack for you,” he said, as he got up, putting Philip down on his two feet as he took his hand, “Come on, buddy.”

Philip followed his Papa contently as Washington cleared his throat: “I think we can all do with a break, gentlemen.”

Thomas frowned. He already thought it quite irresponsible to bring a kid to work, but he supposed the reason must be good enough if Angelica agreed, however stopping a meeting right as they were getting somewhere was annoying.

The kid was cute though. Thomas had no clue who the mother was. Hell, he hadn’t even known Alex was married, or divorced with how he was married to his work.

Also, Grandpa George? Talk about nepotism.

He blinked as Alex got back with Philip. The kid seemed less fidgety and was eating a granola bar with little chocolate chips in it as Alex smiled down gently, not at all like normally. Though, Thomas supposed, he only got to see Alex when the other was yelling or presenting.

It was strange to see Alex so domestic. He had often pictured the other like that, but now it was even easier to picture him – sadly – with a faceless woman, which send a pang through Thomas. It was pathetic how he was crushing on an already taken coworker who hated him.

Though Thomas would never act on those feelings, so it shouldn’t – didn’t – even hurt... that much.

After Martha, he just didn’t know if he could move on like that, but he could allow himself to watch, to torture himself with what he never had or will have.

The rest of the meeting went smoothly with everyone pretending they didn’t notice the small boy crawling under the big table with play cars as he made soft ‘vroom vroom’-noises.

When everyone was leaving Alex squatted and called out: “Hey, Pip, you having fun there?”

“Yes, Papa,” the little voice called back.

“That’s great, buddy,” Alex smiled, “Would you mind moving? We need to go back to my office now, but you can keep playing.”

“But then my cars can’t go to their base under the chair and they need to, because the evil monkeys are after them and they have to go back to defend it,” Philip explained.

Alex listened closely and nodded: “Seems like they’re hardworking cars, Pip. Remember when I was working hard and then we went on a vacation to that cottage in the forest?”

That was a lie, sort of. He had been throwing himself into work because John’s death date had been coming up and Angelica had forced him to take a vacation, sadly backed up by Washington, though Alex had to admit it had been for the better.

“Yes?” Philip was obviously confused about the question.

“Maybe your cars also deserve a vacation,” he said, “They can go on vacation in my office and take a rest from fighting the evil monkeys.”

“Ooh, yes,” the little boy exclaimed as he made his way to his father, who double checked if all their stuff was with them.

When he turned to the door, he was surprised to find Thomas there, soft smile on his face as he waited. Thomas noticed and held up the keys: “It’s my turn to lock up.”

“Ah, well, thank you for waiting,” Alex said awkwardly.

“I didn’t know you had a kid,” Thomas started, trying to fill the strange silence.

“I’m not much of a family talker, but Philip is my pride and joy,” Alex told him, “He’s very smart, isn’tthat right, Pip?”

“Yes, my teacher says I’m very good, one of the bestest in class and I can already write my name. I also draw very good already,” Philip bragged, “And Papa always says I will blow eeeveryone away.”

“Oh, wow, kiddo, that’s pretty good,” Thomas humored the kid, charmed by his smile and excited gestures as he talked, kind of like Alex in a way.

“Well, bye Hamilton.”

“Ah, yes, bye Jefferson.”

They awkwardly went their separate ways, not used to the fact that one of them wasn’t stomping away angrily while the other yelled at them.

Alex shook his head, he felt weird with Thomas being nice to him. He had smiled at Philip and it was genuine, not his normal ‘I’m better than you’- smirk that made Alex want to punch him. It looked good on him and Alex hated how good it looked on him.

Sure, he’s always known Thomas was attractive, but he had a soft spot for people who were good with kids and it didn’t help the stupid feelings he thought he’d suppressed well enough. God, the other man hated him, what was he even thinking?

He tried to let go of the thought as he set Philip down with all the stuff to keep him occupied as he got to work, hoping to get his proposal for the financial planning of the company done.

Philip reminded him to eat lunch, because he was hungry and he went to Angelica, because Philip wanted to see Auntie Angie. For Philip he would do anything, the little boy had him wrapped around his finger.

Angelica was more than happy to eat lunch with them and humored Philip when she listened to his explanation of his car story line until he got distracted by the coloring place mats they had at the restaurant.

Then she turned to Alex and asked: “How are you?”

“I’m doing good, Angie, really. This is not me not taking care of either of us, I swear,” he said, already knowing why she was asking and slightly annoyed, “The school canceled last minute and the babysitter couldn't come and everyone else was busy.”

“Just checking, ‘Lex. We know how hard it’s been since John passed, we just worry,” she soothed his ruffled feathers.

Alex sighed: “I know, I know. I still miss him, but it’s getting better.”

“How much better? Not to be rude, ‘Lex, but you’re wound up. You need to get laid,” she said bluntly.

“Angie!” he exclaimed, glancing at Philip, “There are children here.”

“Yes, and he’s been too focused on his drawing for the past five minutes to pay attention to us,” she rolled her eyes, “But I’m assuming that’s a no to the getting laid.”

“I’m too old for casual hook-ups, Angelica,” he told her, “If I’m going back into dating, I’m going to look for something serious. But no one is looking for a widower in his thirties with a five-year-old kid. And I can’t commit to someone who isn’t going to commit to Pip. He doesn’t need that.”

Angelica nodded: “You’re right, just try not to turn into a sad lonely old man.”

“Like you’re becoming a lonely old woman?” he teased.

“Alexander!” she swatted him lightly.

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry, you’re as radiant as ever, a beacon of beauty and youth,” he retracted his statement with a grin.

“That’s better,” she grinned back.

“Papa, I finished my drawing,” Philip interrupted the two adults, almost spilling his drink when he proudly held up his place mat.

Alex smiled: “That’s beautiful, Pip. Want to take it home tonight?”

“Oh, can I?” the boy asked.

“Of course, buddy,” Alex ruffled his hair, carefully putting the drawing in his briefcase with his other papers, so that he could hang it on the art wall.

They returned to the office and said their goodbyes to Angelica, before Alex got back to work.

It was quiet for a while, then Philip said: “Papa, I’m bored, can I walk around? I can go to Auntie Angie? I promise not to dis- dis- bother other people.”

“Disturb?” Alex asked.

Philip nodded that it was the right word, then asked: “Please, Papa. I promise I’ll be good. I know where Auntie Angie is and if I can’t find you I’ll go to Grandpa George after.”

The boy put on his best puppy eyes, which he had inherited from John, and Alex had never managed to say no to those eyes, so he relented: “Be back in an hour okay? That’s when that big arm is at the four, alright? Be sure to tell Auntie Angie.”

“Alright, Papa!” the boy said, already bouncing out his office with the pent up energy of a small child who had sat for nearly the entire day.

Alex smiled and watched him go. He contemplated getting up to check if Philip made it down the hall alright, but stopped himself.

A memory flashed through his minds eye of John holding a baby Philip and smirking: “You can’t always be there, ‘Lexi. You gotta let him be his own man at some point.”

“But he’s a baby,” he had protested at the time.

John had leaned forwards and kissed his nose: “But he won’t be forever, he’s gotta grow up just like you did. Ain’t nothing wrong with a bit of independence, sweetheart. Letting go is good at some point, just start small.”

He could let go.

Walking down the hall of the office to an adult he knew wasn’t the ultimate danger Philip would face, this was good. A small start just like John had said.

So, with reluctance he focused back on his work and easily got into the zone again as he did. It was easy to loose himself into his work. He was sure that if Philip hadn’t been there, he would have worked himself to death.

Meanwhile Philip walked down the hall, skipping and jumping just because he could and wanted to. He was really planning on visiting Auntie Angie, but he’d already seen her at lunch, so when he saw something more interesting, he stopped.

It was the Mister from before, Jeff- something, it was a long name and Philip hadn’t been paying attention, though he recalled it being a familiar name. He felt bad now, the man had seemed impressed with him.

Maybe he would want to play with him? But he’d promised Papa not to disturb the other people.

Apparently he’d been standing in the man’s doorway long enough for him to notice and ask him if he needed anything and where his Papa was.

“Papa said I could go walk around a bit,” he told the man, “My cars are on vacation and it’s a bit boring and I don’t feel like coloring. Do you like cats, Mister?”

It seemed the man was startled by his sudden change of topic, but he smiled easily and said: “You can call me Thomas.”

“Okay, Mr. Thomas,” Philip nodded, “Do you like cats?”

With Mr. Thomas not actively telling him to go away, Philip decided it was safe to enter the office and Mr. Thomas just pointed at a chair for him to sit in, so he did. He looked at Mr. Thomas awaiting his answer.

“Sure,” he said, “Why do you ask, kiddo?”

Philip shrugged: “Uncle Laf calls Papa petit lion and Uncle Herc explained to me that it’s a type of cat. Auntie Eliza and Auntie Maria wanteda cat, but Auntie Angie is allergic to them, so she doesn’t agree. But Grandpa George and Grandma Martha have cat, though Papa doesn’t like him very much, even though he likes other cats. So I wondered what you thought about cats.”

“Well, I think cats are nice,” Mr. Thomas said.

“Do have a cat?” Philip asked.

Thomas gave up any pretense of work, he hadn’t wanted to do anything anyway and the kid was way more interesting. He shook his head: “No, my friend, Jemmy, is allergic too and I like having him come to the house.”

“Can’t do that if there’s a cat,” Philip said, nodding his head sagely as if he had all the wisdom in the world.

“Yeah,” Thomas laughed at the display, then said: “I don’t know if sitting in my office is going to be very entertaining, kiddo. I don’t really have toys lying around.”

“That’s alright,” Philip said, “You’re Jeff-” he hummed trying to find the name, “Jefferson?” he suddenly remembered, but he didn’t sound very certain.

Thomas nodded: “Yeah, Thomas Jefferson. Why?”

“Papa talks about you lots,” Philip confided in him, recalling why the name was familiar, “He says you’re a meanie, but I think you’re nice, Mr. Thomas. I think Papa does too, he just don’t wanna say it. He says you’re smart, he only says that about Auntie Angie.”

God, the secrets this kid had from Alex ranting at him would be enormous, but Thomas wasn’t going to interrogate a kid about what his father thought of him. A small part of him, however, preened slightly at the indirect compliment from Hamilton.

He pushed the thought down, the man was married and had kids.

“I don’t know, kiddo. Me and your Papa are,” he hesitated, how do you tell a kid that the most talking you do with his father is yelling insults at each other, “We’re not the best buddies,” he finished lamely.

“That’s sad, I think you and Papa would get along greatly. I like you and Papa says I have good taste,” the kid sounded proud of that and Thomas couldn't help but smile, “I think you have good taste too, Mr. Thomas.”

“Really?” Thomas asked curiously.

“Yes, I like your flowers,” Philip pointed to the vase Thomas had filled on a whim, because he’d been sad a few days ago.

“Thanks, kiddo. They’re Canterburybells,” he said, then had a bright idea, “Hey, since you and I have such fantastic taste, why don’t you help me pick out the colors for my presentation? Then I can read you a story if you’d like. I got books.”

Philip lit up and bounced to the other side of the desk, already telling Thomas loudly about which colors were the bestest.

In the end the presentation was yellow and magenta (Thomas was going to have a field day with that) with neon green letters. It was disgusting to look at and Thomas knew he was going to keep and treasure it, especially because Alex couldn’t say anything of it.

He had mostly stuffy old literature on his shelves in the office, but there was also a fairy tale book for when he needed to calm down, not that anyone knew about that, and he read Philip the tale of Hansel and Gretel.

When they were done Philip asked for the time, saying: “Papa told me to be back in an hour, when the big arm was on the four.”

Thomas checked the time, it was five to four. He turned back to Philip: “Well, then young man, you must be going. Here, I’ll accompany you.”

The five-year-old didn’t seem to mind him tagging along as they walked down the hall to Hamilton’s office.

What Thomas hadn’t expected was for the office to be empty. The laptop wasn’t there and only papers and empty mugs scattered the desk. Thomas quickly glanced down to Philip, who looked confused as he asked: “Where’s Papa?”

“I don’t know, kiddo,” Thomas told him honestly, he spotted a phone on the desk and mentally cursed, if Hamilton had forgotten his kid and phone he was going to scream. Though it was highly unlikely the man would leave that early.

Then he spotted a note on the desk: Angie or Washington, I don’t know which one of you Pip will look for. I got called by fucking Lee for an emergency (I doubt it actually is, but you know how he gets, the prick). I’ll be back before five, please just watch him for me. I’m so sorry.

Relief coursed through Thomas’s veins that Alex had at least been responsible enough to leave a note.

He turned to Philip: “Hey, the note says your Papa has been called away for a bit.”

“Oh, okay,” Philip replied, “What do I do?”

Philip really was a smart kid, probably got it from his dad. Thomas smiled: “I don’t mind hanging out with you for a little bit longer, but maybe I could call your mom?”

It was an acceptable time to be done with work earlyand Thomas knew Lee was as much of a prick as Alex’s note had claimed, and the man hated Alex. Ifhe could keep him busy, he would, just because it would piss Alex off.

“I don’t have a mom,” Philip told him.

Thomas knew Alex was bi of course, but with the kid he’d made the assumption. He quickly adapted and said: “Do you have a dad then?”

Philip nodded and Thomas was about to ask if he knew how to contact him, trying to ignore the pang of jealousy, when the kid said: “But Papa said I can’t see Daddy, because he’s living with the angels now.”

Oh fuck, Thomas had not seen this coming and he was floundering.

“According to Papa, he didn’t mean to go, but he can’t get back to us. We visit his special place sometimes,” Philip was oblivious to all the emotions Thomas was experiencing, “There are a lot of stones there, but we always go to one with Daddy’s picture on it and Papa cries.”

That was probably much more than Alex wanted him to know. He briefly thought of Martha and how they’d never had kids. He didn’t know how he would have explained her death to them if they had.

“I’m sorry, kiddo,” he said instead, “Must be hard with one parent, though it seems your Papa loves you very much.”

“He does,” Philip smiled widely, “He takes me to the park on Saturdays and we run around. He teaches me about all sorts of stuff, like dinos. Do you know about dinos, Mr. Thomas?”

Thomas was glad for the change of topic and nodded: “I’ve heard of them, but I don’t know much. Why don’t you tell me more about them?”

“Well, they come from eggs. I did too, did you know? Papa said he froze eggs and I came crawling out, just like a dino,” Philip told him excitedly. Thomas was confused about what on earth that could mean, but just nodded along to the kid’s babbling.

An hour later Alex stomped into his office, grumbling under his breath about what an asshat Lee was.

He stopped at the empty office, he knew Philip must be with Angelica or Washington, but with the note still there, he didn’t know which one. He went back into the hallway and saw Washington walk by. Stopping the man he said: “Perfect timing. Is Pip with you? I got called away and told him to find you or Angie.”

“No, son, he must be with Miss Schuyler,” Washington smiled, “How was it with Lee?”

“Sir, if you don’t want a verbal essay, I suggest you don’t ask,” Alex sighed tiredly. He just wanted to go home and sleep.

Washington chuckled then stepped into his office as Alex made his way over to Angelica’s office, he knocked on her door and opened it with a: “Hi, Angie, I’ll take Philip now, thanks for watching him.”

Angelica looked up from her work with confusion: “Philip? I haven’t seen Philip since lunch, Alex. What are you talking about.”

The blood in his veins turned to ice as he said: “But, he was going to you. He said he wanted to say hi. He’d be back by four, but I got called away. I left you a note. Are you sure you didn’t see him?”

“No, I wouldn’t lie about that,” Angelica said, “Why didn’t you walk with him?”

Alex was already beating himself up over it: “Fuck, I’m so stupid. I thought he would be fine, that I should let him go, be independent. I’m a terrible father and now something might have happened to Pip. God, what if he’s dead?”

“Hey, none of that, calm down, just breathe,” Angelica put her hand on his shoulder, “He probably got distracted. He’s still around, I’m sure. Someone else must have seen him.”

They got distracted by a southern voice floating down the hall: “Hamilton, there you are. I was wondering if I should start charging hours.”

“Papa!” Philip yelled excitedly, running up to his Papa, who crushed him into a tight hug with a sigh of relief.

“There you are. Pip, I was so worried. You said you were going to Auntie Angie,” he scolded the boy, “Don’t scare me like that again. I thought something had happened.”

“Sorry, Papa,” Philip sounded genuinely upset.

“It’s okay, baby, it’s okay. Papa didn’t mean to make you upset, I was just worried,” after soothing his son, he turned to Thomas and glared, “Do you often kidnap children?”

Thomas looked up shocked and in an offend voice replied: “Excuse you? I didn’t kidnap him. He showed up to my office telling me he was allowed to walk around. He asked me about cats and I just made sure he was okay. You should be thanking me, it could have gone a lot worse.”

Alex eyed him suspiciously, but was distracted by Philip: “He’s right, he listened to me back at the room with the table and I was just wondering what he thought of cats, then he let me help with his presentation and read me a story and then I told him about the dinos.”

“I know we have our disagreements, Hamilton, but I’m not going to be an as- meanie to a kid,” he said.

“Nice save,” Angelica smirked.

“Oh shove off, Angelica,” Thomas rolled his eyes good-naturedly, he liked the eldest Schuyler. He had met her a long time ago, back when Martha was still there.

Alex checked over Philip one more time, before begrudgingly acknowledging that Thomas had done him a favor. So, he said: “Thank you, Jefferson. For making sure Pip was alright.”

“No worries, man. I have a lot of siblings,” Thomas shrugged.

Angelica looked between them and smirked, before saying: “Here, I’ll go grab your stuff, ‘Lex. You and Thomas make sure you’re on the same page about this. I don’t want to have you screaming because of a misunderstanding, you do it enough without them.”

Philip walked off happily with his Auntie Angie, leaving Alex and Thomas on their own.

“Did he behave well?” Alex asked, breaking the silence.

Thomas looked confused for a moment, then smirked: “Yeah, he’s a sweet boy. Certainly didn’t get that from you.”

Alex chuckled: “No, he got every good bone in his body from John,” his smile was far away and soft, before he shookhimself out of it, “I’m glad you listened to him, he’s a good kid.”

“No problem, really,” Thomas shrugged.

It was quiet for a moment.

“Can I ask why he thinks he crawled out of an egg like a dinosaur?” Thomas asked, unable to help himself. He was just too curious and it was weird for a kid to think that. He just wanted to know what an earth Alex had told the boy.

The random question startled Alex, who laughed after a second. He explained: “Kids at school were asking how he could have two dads, so I told them that I froze some of my eggs and his other Daddy made sure they would work, before Auntie Eliza hatched him. I compared it to dinosaurs because he understands them and thinks they’re cool. I guess he only picked up some parts.”

“So, he’s not related to the Schuyler's?” Thomas asked, then elaborated, “Just with the whole Auntie Angie and Auntie Eliza he was talking about, I assumed his other parent was one of their sibling hoard.”

“No,” Alex said, “He’s completely mine and Johns.”

It was quiet for a beat, then Thomas said: “I didn’t know you were trans.”

Alex shrugged: “It’s not really something I tell people, especially with how they start calling me a mother, no thanks. Besides, it’s none of their business anyway. Philip is mine and they can keep their opinions of my parenting to themselves.”

Thomas nodded: “That makes sense. For what it’s worth, you’re a great dad. Philip is lucky to have you. I know you didn’t want me to know, probably, but he told me his other dad was living with angels. I’m sorry for your loss.”

“I don’t need your pity,” Alex bit out after a hard swallow. He didn’t need Thomas treating him differently just because his husband was dead, he got that enough as it was. He missed John dearly, but he was healing and the special treatment just made it harder.

He was surprised by Thomas’s reply: “I’m not pitying you, Alex. I just wanted you to know that he told me and that you can talk to me.”

“That’s-” Alex hesitated, slightly confused, “That’s… nice? I suppose. But you’re not really my first confidant.”

“I know,” Thomas shrugged, he seemed to be preparing himself for something, “I just know how some people don’t get it and it can be annoying, so if you ever just wanna talk, please do,” he pulled out a necklace from his shirt, on it were two golden bands, “I’m not messing with you, or pitying you.”

“I didn’t know,” Alex mumbled, feeling a bit sheepish for his earlier reaction, “How- How long ago?”

“Seven years,” Thomas answered, “Martha- she was the best, but she had heart problems. I knew we didn’t have long, but it still hurt. She was just too young.”

There were tears in his eyes and Alex could feel himself tearing up as well. He said: “The better ones always die first somehow, fuck. John- John died four years ago. Wanted to do one last tour, before settling down. They were already retreating when-”

He couldn't finish the sentence, but Thomas understood. It was weird how much it made sense that Thomas understood.

They’d always been each others equal. Both in debate and passion. They knew how to push the other and got why. They were the same, just different, so of course Thomas of all people would understand.

Both stood there in silence, tears still in their eyes, but content to just stand there.

At that point Angelica came back with Philip. She was about to start a sentence when she saw the state they were in: “Jesus, are you two alright? I swear, I leave you for a few minutes and-”

“We’re fine, Angie,” Alex quickly wiped away his tears and attempted a smile.

Philip ran up to him and with his arms demanded to be carried. When Alex obliged he asked: “Are you okay, Papa?”

“Yeah, Pip, Papa’s fine,” Alex assured him, “Remember how I told you about the missing sad. It was that.”

“Like when I can’t see Sockie at school and I miss him, right?” Philip asked.

“Exactly that, Pip,” Alex agreed, “Now, what do you say about going home, buddy? Does that sound alright? We can watch Moana.”

“I love Moana!” Philip chirped.

Alex turned to Angelica and Thomas and said: “We’re gonna go. Uhm, thank you both and, uh, I might take you up on that, Thomas. Now say bye, Pip.”

“Bye Auntie Angie, bye Mr. Thomas,” Philip said with a wave, a quick yawn escaping him after all the excitement as he burrowed closer into his Papa’s arms while they walked out of the building.

When they were gone, Angelica turned to Thomas with a raised brow: “So, Mr. Thomas,” she put extra emphasis on the name, “You’ve got yourself a social upgrade.”

“Shut up, I should have never told you about that stupid crush,” Thomas hid his head in his hands.

“I think you two would be cute together,” Angelica said, then she asked: “Why were you two crying, by the way? Are you okay?”

He put the necklace back and said: “I told him about Martha, seemed fair after the kid told me about John. I didn’t know Alex was a widower, nor that he had kids.”

“Yeah, ‘Lex used to love bragging about John and Philip, but ever since-” she sighed, “Well, you know. He hasn’t been the same.”

“I don’t think anyone can stay the same after living through that,” Thomas told her, “I was always saddened I had no kids with Martha, but after today. Fuck, I don’t know what I would have told them. I don’t think I could have handled it.”

Angelica shrugged: “It’s different for everyone, I think Philip saved ‘Lex’s life. He got up each day to care for him. Don’t tell him I told you that, I will slap you again.”

“I won’t, I swear,” Thomas held his hands up in surrender and luckily Angelica believed him, because she smiled: “Good, I know where you live.”

“You are terrifying,” he informed her.

“That’s why we’re such good friends,” she merely smiled, “Now, let’s go, you still owe me dinner for giving you private time with Papa Alex.”

Thomas flushed a bright red and told her he hated her, before following her out of the building as she cackled at his misery.

After that things went back to normal.

Mostly.

Somewhere he had imagined the interaction would be some revelation or something and the next day would be completely different.

But it just wasn’t.

They had a meeting in the morning, it was the first time they saw each other that day and within minutes it had turned into an argument.

Though, perhaps the arguments had gotten less personal. They had always thrown in slight digs at the other, believing themselves to know the man before them and judging the person they’d built in their mind, but when that fell away, it was hard to make digs at someone who understood.

So work returned to normal, with arguments echoing through the halls, which were now followed by civil conversation as they walked to their offices.

It was only a month later that it changed.

You know, this fic is getting much bigger than expected and has gotten severely out of hand. It was meant to be a cute Philip at work fic, but then I thought about past John/Alex (and not fucking Eliza over bc I love her too much for it) and now it hasturnedinto a gigantic angst pile turning fluffwith a slow burn thrown in there, something I have never written before, but I’m having fun.

#RR writing #Hamilton #alexander hamilton #philip hamilton #thomas jefferson #jamilton #Hamilton AU #angelica schuyler #george washington #'Till Death Do Us Part #'Till Death Do Us Part AU #'Till Death Do Us Part Part 1

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