#i tried so hard and from what. to jump the favoritism scale down to hated with the teacher that was our sponsor that i thought i could

[tulipberrysimss]

OC deep dive with my favorite gal Izzy🫶🏻✨ thank you for the tag @cupidszone !!

What uncommon/common fear do they have? She has a fear of failure, she was the oldest child in the household and had to step up and pave the way, which led to some extreme anxiety especially when she started failing in school. As a child she did develop a fear of being inferior. 

Do they have any pet peeves? Izzy HATES when there’s dirty dishes either on the table or in the sink, IT GOES IN THE DISHWASHER, her husband and son are so bad at putting dirty dishes where they are supposed to go and she constantly has to remind them. She does have a habit that is her son’s biggest pet peeve, she clicks her pen whenever she’s writing and it drives him crazy. 

What are 3 items you can find in their bedroom? A miniature model of her rocket ship, one of her son’s old teddy bears and a lot of sketches of upgrades for the rocket

What do they notice first in a person? Their sense of humor! Whenever she was feeling down while growing up, her cousin would always cheer her up with a couple of jokes or a funny story. 

On a scale of 1 to 10, how high is their pain tolerance? A solid 8/10!

Do they go into fight or flight mode when under pressure? Depends on the situation! She goes into flight mode if she’s arguing with someone in her family since she doesn’t want to come off as disrespectful and if it’s someone outside the family or her little brother, she goes into fight mode. If it’s a difficult task or work she goes into fight mode immediately cuz she enjoys solving difficult situations. 

Do they come from a big family/are they a family person? She comes from a big family! She grew up with her parents, two younger brothers, her aunt and her son and whoever her aunt was seeing at the time. She is a family person but never wanted a big one of her own. 

What animal represents them best? Probably a penguin

What is a smell that they dislike? B.O, her son is so bad at showering and he works out every day too. She hates the smell of shellfish as well. 

Have they broken any bones? The joints in her left shoulder are somewhat unstable so she tends to dislocate her shoulder quite often. 

How would a stranger likely describe them? Introverted and hard to get close to. She’s a loner with trust issues after all. 

Are they a night owl or a morning bird? Night Owl 100%!! Since she spent a lot of years as a single mom, she realized she only ever had the night to herself and that’s a habit she can’t get rid of. 

What is a flavor they hate and a flavor they love? She hates the taste of oranges or any type of citrus really. She loves loves loves sweets though, especially caramel!

Do they have any hobbies? Rocket science and chess, which sounds so boring to a lot of people but she can really spend hours just zoning out with anything mentally challenging. 

Boom, surprise birthday party! How do they react to surprises? She’d be absolutely MORTIFIED to be in the dark about this. And having a bunch of people jumping out and screaming happy birthday sounds like nightmare material. She really doesn’t enjoy being the center of attention either. 

Do they like to wear jewelry? She doesn’t care much for jewelry, other than her wedding ring and earrings, she doesn’t bother with anything else. 

Do they have neat or messy handwriting? Her handwriting isn’t intelligible to anyone other than herself, she’s always in such a rush to write when inspiration for the next rocket upgrade hits or when she needs to calculate math formulas. 

What are two emotions they feel the most? A good mix of anxiety and happiness, they tend to come and go in a circle. 

Do they have a favorite fabric? There’s just something about corduroy that’s so appealing to her. 

What kind of accent do they have? I can’t imagine that she has an accent but she does use a lot of “difficult” words, she tries to tone that down when talking to others but they tend to slip out. 

I don’t know who has done this but consider yourself tagged if you haven’t already!✨

#nsb extras

[biotic-boshtet]

1-10 for the ryder ask meme!

Thank you!!!

fifty questions for pathfinder ryder

Canon says that Ryder served in the Alliance. Did your Ryder(s) serve? Any regrets or ambitions? Do they miss it?

Natalie Sara Ryder was well on her way to the coveted N7 designation. By the time the full scope of Alec's research came out and nuked her career, she'd made N3 and was ready to undertake N4.

She definitely misses the structure and tight chain of command in the Alliance.

2. How did your Ryder feel about the Initiative prior to leaving the Milky Way?

She thought it was a very interesting concept, kinda hard to fully comprehend the scale, and she only came along because her career was in ruins, her mom was dead, and her brother was going with Alec. She didn't have anything or anyone left in the Milky Way to stay with.

3. How does your Ryder feel about the Initiative now?

She hates how up in the air everything is. How fragile what little sense of order they have is. They should have handled the uprising better.

4. How does Ryder feel about being the new Pathfinder? Scared? Excited? How do they feel about all the attention they’re getting?

Natalie is terrified. The entire fate of the Initiative is resting on her shoulders, and she didn't even really want to be here. It sucks, man.

5. What was your Ryder’s relationship with their mother?

She loved Ellen so much. Ellen was vocal about her love and pride in a way Alec never managed. Natalie spent more time with Ellen in the end than Alec or Scott. Losing her mother shattered her.

6. What was their relationship like with Alec?

Natalie was constantly struggling to get his approval. Whenever she'd talk to him, he would always tell her about what her brother was doing and how proud he was and this and that and he always thought she knew how proud of her he was, but he often forgot to say those words, out loud with his voice, often enough to actually make sure she'd believed it. He'd tell anybody in the universe how proud he is of his kids until he's blue in the face, but when it comes to telling them? He forgets. his kids love him but its like there's a wall between them that doesn't really come down.

7. Does your Ryder have any regrets about coming to Andromeda? Is there anything they miss in particular from the Milky Way?

She really really misses the food. Its hard to find pizza or ramen or dumplings or barbecue it a whole other galaxy. I don't think she regrets coming though.

8. Any tattoos or piercings?

Both ears are full of 4 and 5 piercings each. 3 up each earlobe, then a double helix in her right cartilage and a regular piercing on the left.

9. Does your Ryder have any scars? If so, where?

She'd got a dimple on her left thigh from a stray bullet during her first live fire exercise. She's got another scar right below her left ear from a bit of shrapnel during N2 training.

10. What’s your Ryder’s personality like?

She's pretty mellow when she doesnt have 60,000 +/- souls relying on her. She tries to collect a rock from everywhere she goes. Thinks puns are really funny. Her favorite color is purple. She snorts when she laughs. She'll tackle problems head on, and if that doesn't work she'll try again until it does. Delicate political machinations are lost on her. She'll biotic punch someone over shooting them any day. She uses the jump jets almost exclusively for rock climbing assistance.

#natalie sara ryder #ask meme #mass effect andromeda #pathfinder ryder

[astaroth1357]

Brothers Accidentally Make the MC Cry

Hello, this is the obligatory italics blurb that I have to put under my titles or else things look weird and it bothers me. Don’t mind the blurb. The blurb is a friend. (Though I could start writing pieces of a little story up here just to see if anyone even reads them… Hm…. Ideas, ideas...)

Warning: Angsty

Lucifer 

If he were being honest, he’d say that a part of him had always feared this would happen...

Lucifer likes to tell himself that he’s invincible, but everyday stresses can get to him just like anybody else. And like other people, he may not always act his best when he’s dealing with a full plate…

The MC hadn’t meant to make his day harder when they told him that they accidentally broke a lamp. It was a genuine accident! But Lucifer was still dealing with the fallout from another one of Mammon’s failed schemes, Satan had cursed all of his ties again, and Beel had eaten every scrap of food in the House… for the second time that week...

In comparison to everything else, a broken lamp was quite minor, but for Lucifer it was just the last straw and, for just a moment, he lost control…

His palm slamming against his desk hard enough to snap its legs and send it crashing to the ground. He scarcely knew what kind of look he had on his face, but whatever it was, he had made his human jump back in shock...

Really, it was silly for them to assume that he had gotten that upset over a lamp, but he saw tears starting to gather in their eyes all the same as they stammered out a quiet apology… 

It felt like an ice spike to the heart. Damn his temper… He really ought to have been more careful with them after… well, everything he’d done before…

He was quick to go over to them, catching their face with his hand and giving them the most sincere apology he could muster while wiping away their tears… Overreactions aren’t becoming of him and he hated to cause them pain… 

He, of course, took care of the lamp himself as penance and on the surface that seemed to be it (but to anyone paying attention, he had softened up on the MC considerably for at least a week. They probably could have sworn in front of Diavolo and he’d let it slide, he felt that bad about it...)

“I’m sorry, MC, I shouldn't have reacted like that… You haven’t done anything wrong, I promise… Please, there’s no need to cry…”

Mammon

Oh? What's that? His heart is now in a million pieces now...? Well, that seems fair…

He and the MC were out on one of his gambling nights and he was actually on a killer winning streak for once! Jackpots around every corner, he was rolling in it!

The MC had tried to convince him to just throw in the towel early, take his winnings while he had them and bail, but he wasn’t hearing any of it.

In hindsight, their insistence must have really shown how much the MC cared about him and wanted him to keep his earnings... but in the heat of the moment all he saw was someone trying to spoil his one night of fun.

To be fair to Mammon, it’s rather rare for him to lose control of his anger like he did. But when they tried to pull him away from the roulette table, he genuinely snarled at them and told them to get lost...!

Fortunately, he regretted his actions immediately after he saw the hurt in their eyes…

If their goal had been to get him to step away from the table, they achieved it. But only because he got up to pull them into a hug while stammering out apologies… Watching them actually shed tears hurt worse than any rope Lucifer had ever tied around him...

He spent the rest of the night away from the casino and trying to cheer up his human like his life depended on it... Seeing them in pain just tore him up that much.

"Ah, come on MC… I'm sorry, honest…! Please don't look at me like that, I'll do whatever ya want okay...? Just no more cryin…"

Leviathan 

Now thinks he's the worst, literally the worst. Lower than lesser demon spit. Lower than Cerberus' shit. Lower than… well, you get the idea…

Levi can get very… intense when things involving his passions are brought up. This can be a fairly endearing quality… but it also means he gets disproportionately impassioned about seemingly minor things.

Levi ended up snapping at the MC when they let him over-sleep one day. This wasn’t unusual for them to do as Levi’s sleep schedule was notoriously shitty, but they shouldn't have done it that particular day…

An item he wanted on Akuzon was going to go live that morning and he had to be awake to participate in the bidding. He had mentioned it to the MC the day before, but he blew past it so quickly they didn’t actually remember…

He found out that he missed the bidding after he woke up and he was pissed. Genuinely enraged that they didn’t remember to wake him up to the point that he was shouting and baring his fangs! 

… Really it was not a good look and he should have known better.

The look of fear and the tears gathering in the MC’s eyes snapped him out of it like a hard slap to the face, and somehow, it stung even more than that would’ve... It wasn’t long before he was crying along with them, practically begging for forgiveness...

He made it up to them by having a private showing of their favorite movie using a projector in the Planetarium, cuddling with them under a blanket while still, occasionally, muttering apologies under his breath.

“M-MC…? MC don’t cry…!! Please don’t cry, I- I’m sorry!! I… MC… I’m so sorry…”

Satan

Like Lucifer, he always worried this would happen and he hated when it finally came to pass…

He’d spent all his life learning how to restrain his temper, but it’s not a perfect science. There are the occasional times where the heat of the moment gets the better of him and he does something he regrets…

The MC had walked in on him one morning while he was fuming about Beel leaving the fridge empty again. It hadn’t been the first time they’d seen him like this, but this time he was absolutely furious.

He had told Beel again and again and again to get his snacking under control or to, you know, get up early and get more food so the whole family wouldn’t spend the morning starving but noooo! Mr. I’m Hungry never thinks about anything but his own stomach and then leaves whoever’s on kitchen duty to pick up the slack like some dimwitted muscle-bound meathead and THEN-!!

When the MC tried to take his arm to calm him down, he jerked their hand away from him and roared right in their face. He may not be a lion, but the full sound of a pissed off demon could make humans have breakdowns all on its own…

Which was more or less what the MC began to do as he gripped their wrist, panicking while taking shallow, stuttered breaths…

Satan's anger left him swiftly and he let them go, only reaching out to touch them again when he tried to wipe the tears from their cheeks… He had to coo and beg for them to calm down, which was only so successful because he was fighting back tears himself… 

On a scale of 1-10 of the worse things his temper has ever done, he'd rank this a firm 200... He refused to touch them for about a week afterwards and it took a long time for him to trust himself again… He just didn't want to hurt them...

"MC?? MC…? M… Oh no… MC, I'm so sorry, I would never hurt you! I… I wouldn't dare… please believe me..."

Asmodeus 

Oh baby! Sweetheart! Love of his life!! No, please no… don't subject him to this…

MC and Asmo were out dancing and some witch came by to try and flatter him.

Now, Asmo is a flirt normally, but get a few drinks in him and well… Let's just say his love of attention overrides his better judgment far more often than it should and friends don't let friends go home with creepy witches.

When the MC told the witch to scram, Asmo was confused and, frankly, quite irritated. That lovely lady had been stroking his ego in all the right ways and his human just scared her off so rudely!

Under most situations, Asmo would have kept his cool better but the haze of Demonus made his tongue loose... which let the venom fly…

He couldn’t quite remember what he said. The words left his mouth so quickly that they slurred together on his clumsy tongue, but it must have been enough because the MC flinched away from him.

That hurt all on its own, but as he started to process the pain in their eyes… he had never sobered up so fast...

He had their cheeks cupped in his hands and were kissing away their tears within the instant. Though the loud music at the club should have drowned out his apologies, the MC could see it written all over his equally tearful face…

He pulled them into his arms and then out of the club shortly after, the fog of Demonus that plagued him just moments before had long left him and all he knew was that the MC needed to be brought home and cuddled… stat.

“M-MC…? I’m sorry was it something… did I…? I’m so sorry… Please don’t cry…!”

Beelzebub 

He really didn't mean to shout so loud… honest... 

Beel becomes a completely different person when he’s hungry. He’s not entirely to blame, as his hunger can get so intense, but he still can snap from time to time when he really doesn’t mean to…

It was right after one of his practices and Beel hadn’t gotten a chance to eat in a few hours by the time the MC came to grab him from RAD. That already had him in a bad mood, but practice hadn’t gone too well for him either… 

He honestly didn’t realize how sharply he snapped at the MC when they asked him how he was. The irritation and frustration of the day all hit him at once and he became much harsher towards them than he ever intended…

It must have been the shock of seeing ever-sweet Beel suddenly get so aggressive with them that startled them so. He saw a couple tears gathering in their eyes before they could hide them and his heart just sank…

The MC was picked up in a crushing bear hug before they even let out their first sniffle. Beel didn’t even have to say how sorry he was, they could feel it in every squeeze he gave them. All while he completely ignored the growling of his stomach...

Beel wouldn’t let them go until he was certain they’d forgiven him which, honestly, took a while. Mammon was the one to ask why he had carried them all the way back to the House like a baby but… well, he didn’t need to know, now did he?

“MC, I’m sorry… I shouldn’t have shouted… Are you alright...?”

Belphegor 

Stubborn boi is stubborn and trying really, really hard not to crack right now...

That's not going to last long.

Belphie can be a bit of a brat and since he's the baby of the family so he's used to getting his way. He and the MC don't argue a ton, but when they do, he always digs his heels in and refuses to budge an inch on anything.

So what started out as a simple disagreement on how often Belphie would flake out on his chores turned into a kick-the-door-down argument over how much his laziness left the MC to pick up the slack...

It ended as all their barn burning arguments do, with demon-form Belphie sitting cross-legged on his bed refusing to look at them and the MC angrily pacing about the room until he cools off…

And then he heard it.

First a sniffle… and then a hiccup. Another sniffle then muffled whine…

Oh no… not this… Why are they crying…? They don't normally cry…

To his credit (or perhaps discredit), he managed to hold out for about two minutes before he finally glanced back at them. Seeing the MC wiping their tears all alone on the floor crumbled his resolve real quick.

The MC found themselves enveloped by Belphie's arms before they even noticed he got up. Naturally, he was pouting and trying to make it seem like "not a big deal or anything" but they could tell by the nervous twitch of his tail that he was hurting too…

Needless to say. Belphie started remembering his chores a lot more after that.

"Humans are so fragile… I didn't mean to make you cry, you know? I'll get things done just… Don't cry… please…"

#obey me #obey me shall we date #shall-we-date-obey-me #obey me lucifer #obey me mammon #obey me leviathan #obey me satan #obey me asmodeus #obey me beelzebub #obey me belphegor #obey me headcanons #obey me scenarios #obey me imagines

[taro-im]

Tsukishima Calls you Fat~

warning: kind of angst to fluff

*******ALSO ALL BODY SIZES R BEAUTIFUL *******

this is just a scenario so pls love your bodies

also this is my first time writing so sry if it sounds cringey or weird 😶

Tsukishima and you are about to go to your first year of college

Tsukishima and you have been dating since your first year in Karasuno, in your third year you were starting to stress out more because of exams, career paths, and the future

So during your last year you have been stress eating it has been a bad habit of yours to stress eat, you didn’t pay attention to how much you ate because you were more focused on exams and getting into your dream college

You barely spended time with your boyfriend Kei Tsukishima you guys haven’t seen each other after graduation …………….

Finally you got into your dream college, it felt like you were on Cloud 9

The first person you called was Kei and he was so happy for you

Him and you got into the same college and planned to rent an apartment together in 2 months………..:…………………………………………….

One day you were in the bathroom and noticed you gained more weight than usual, you went on your scale and noticed you gained 10 pounds you were shocked and disappointed in your self, how did you gain 10 pounds in only 3 months? you blamed yourself and beated yourself up about it

Then you decided to go on a diet, you felt embarrassed if Tsukishima saw you like this, you didn’t hung out with him, you lied and texted him “ I’m going to my home town for the summer” You barely ate, all you did was run and exercise all summer it was always very hard for you to loose weight since you were a child

Finally you only lost a couple pounds, you felt more confident and happy

lil time skip college starts soon

it has been the day you’ve been waiting for, seeing your boyfriend after 2 months of only texting each other, you jumped into his arms and hugged him so tight and he patted you on the head and said “ idiot your hugging me too tight I’m not going anywhere come one lets put our things in out apartment” you giggled and both started to unpack and settle into this new place that you will be sharing with your loving boyfriend

You and Kei talk about how your summers went and cuddled under the beautiful view of the Tokyo night sky

time skip 4 months of living together

It was a very stressful day for you, you had 2 big projects due in a week, that would affect your grade. You haven’t stressed ate in a long time tbh when you ever were stressed you would either barely eat or eat to much but you would never noticed

You and Kei never really saw each other only in the morning, He worked part time at a music store and the job ended at twelve so you only had a glimpse of each other before you went to school, that whole week you stressed ate and binged, finally it was time to turn in the assignment and you gotted an A on both you were so happy and all the stress was gone, you celebrated with one of your friends from high school at a restraunt, she looked at you and said “ omg y/n you gained so much weight what happened did you stress eat again???” Suddenly you mood was sour, she enjoyed the dinner and you barely touched your food, you looked in the mirror in disgust and noticed you gained that weight back you hated yourself for it so you tried you best at starving your self, you lost most of the weight you gained and felt a little better

Today was a Saturday, Tsukishima was off and today you and him finally got to spend time with each other after a long time even though you both live together you barely saw each other or texted each other then you used to, it felt like your relationship was falling apart

Tsukishima wasn’t in his best mood today and you didn’t even knew that he got fired from his job. While Tsukishima was in a bad mood you were so happy he got to stay home today so you figured that you and him could cuddle and watch movies together so you made cookies and brought snacks from the store and went to his room……………

“Keiiiii guess whattttt I made cookies for us and some snacks we could watch a movie and cuddle together” you said in pure excitement not noticing he was pissed “ not now” he groaned “come on we haven’t spent time with each other for a long time it will be fun” you said, “Can you fuck off Y/n I’m not in the mood right now and it looks like you’ve gained weight so I think it’s best not to eat any cookies or snack right now you should be in a diet” he said in anger and frustration, your face wall full of embarrassment, you holded in your tears, you didn’t even know what to say all you could think of to say was “ sorry for bothering you I’ll just throw the food away” you left and closed the door trying to hold in your embarrassment, guilt, and anger you were trying your best to loose that weight you only had 1 meal a day you haven’t had snacks since the project which was a month ago, your friend called you fat but you didn’t really take close to heart because she was only being honest, you tried your best but now suddenly your boyfriend tells you this? You feel so lonely, even though you both were bo the living in the same roof it feels like you were more distant then ever, all your insecurities when into your head.

After that fight you saw Tsukishima more often but it was so awkward, you tried avoiding him he would try to start a convo with you but you would cut him off and say “ sorry I have um I have something important to do” and you would go to your room, he would always be in the living room studying, you felt really petty for ignoring him but you just couldn’t go back to normal he didn’t even apologize, you took his words to close to heart and barely ate just water and some granola

“Hey Y/n I brought your favorite cake today and your favorite drink come eat with me” he said, He literally just called me fat 2 weeks ago the fuck? you felt so angered and said “just throw it away I don’t want to get fat” “who called you fat you look fine?” He said so confused, you had tears from built up anger, tears trickled down your face making Tsukishima shocked and hugged you tightly “darling what’s wrong why are you crying who made you upset?” He said confused “you literally called me fat 2 weeks ago, and told me to fuck off i just wanted to spend time with you, and you just got angry at me” you said sniffling, Tsukishima suddenly remembered what happened 2 weeks ago he was so angry that he accidentally took his anger out on you “I’m so sorry Y/n I’m such an idiot… I took out my anger on you that I didn’t even payed attention to what I said, that day I got fired from my part time job and I wasn’t in a good mood I’m so sorry baby I didn’t mean to hurt you” he said sounding regretful “It’s ok Kei I’m sorry to hear that you got fired are you ok?” You said concerned “It’s ok but I just needed a little more money to get you that bag you saw in high school I was going to surprise u for yur birthday but I can’t buy it now” he said, so the reason why you didn’t see him that much is because he wanted to buy that bag In display during high school which was really expensive… he really remembered that one time you went to Tokyo together in highschool, You always thought that your boyfriend never really noticed but he did. Both of you makes up with each other but Tsukishima was mostly sorry and you both decided to go on a date tommorow and spend the whole day together

#haikyuu angst #tsukishima scenarios #tsukishima kei #tsukishima oneshot #tsukishima fluff #tsukishima angst #tsukishima x reader #haikyuu headcanons

[bbangsoonie]

good for nothing

member: juyeon genre: angst (royal au) word count: 4,635 synopsis: despite being the first born and the kingdom’s princess, you lived your whole life in the shadow of the crown prince born to a concubine. in your plot for revenge, a fool in love comes along your path. warning(s): violence

kingdom masterlist

Princess Y/n. You were the first born of the king and queen, educated beyond societal standards for girls, and incredibly beautiful. Yet, you were disregarded and looked down on since the moment you were born. Your brother, who was born to a concubine, was the crown prince and received much greater respect. The reason? You were a girl. A good-for-nothing girl as your father called you on multiple occasions.

The king was ashamed to have his first born be a daughter. He also felt threatened by your rejection of the status quo. Because of this, he grabbed every opportunity to make you submit to him.

You were exceptionally smart but no one cared to notice. Your desire to learn was ignored and you were forced to embroider butterfly patterns instead. At a young age, you realized your place. You knew your designated fate was to be a political pawn meant to be married off at a beautiful age. To protect the royal family that never considered you as one of their own, you were to marry a complete stranger one day.

However, just because you realized your place didn’t mean you accepted it. You defied the rules at every chance you saw. You remained a headache for the king, but a small enough headache to avoid his wrath.

Unbeknownst to him, you were well versed with the dirty politics of the country. Ever since you were a little girl, you would eavesdrop into the ministers’ conversations and manipulate the eunuchs to take a peak at written grievances sent to the king. You knew about the starving peasants he ignored and the bribes he received. As you grew older, you became hungry for power. When it became apparent that the king was blocking any hope for you, you were determined to take as many people down with you. You refused to suffer alone.

The king always berated you for being greedy. Greedy for education. Greedy for acknowledgement. Greedy for a life that was more than just being a good wife. He reminded you again and again that you would never have a voice in official affairs.

Every time you left his chamber after another lecture, you made sure to humiliate the embarrassment the kingdom called the crown prince. You would outshine him one way or another. Whether it be pointing out his grammar mistakes in front of the scholars or exposing his secret palace escapes to the queen, you would dampen his mood for the day. It was the only thing that gave you a speck of joy.

There was also only one thing that gave you something to look forward to. For years, you had been conspiring against the royal family. You despised the royal family and its classist, sexist, and pretentious values. You planned on getting rid of it once and for all. The kingdom deserved a leader that would rule benevolently. Slowly but surely, you gained the loyalty of several ministers. Soon enough, you would be able to execute the meticulous coup d'état.

But until then, you had to continue to be nothing but the king’s puppet. Which included meeting your fiancé. You were introduced a week ago and wedding preparations were already in full swing.

The man you would be forced to wed, Lee Juyeon, was the first son of the Chief State Councillor. You didn’t like him the moment you saw him. He was a pretty face that grew up with his father’s full love and support. He was both elegant and masculine; he was the definition of perfect and you hated it. A person had to have flaws to be likeable.

For some crazy reason you couldn’t wrap your mind around, Juyeon was infatuated with you. He visited the palace every day just to have you decline his request for a meeting. He was persistent.

Unfortunately for you, he was also crafty. He figured out that announcing his arrival to the king was an effective way to see your face. The king was delighted to see the Chief State Councillor’s son head over heels for his daughter and thus, to your annoyance, daily meetings were arranged for you two.

“Tell me, Lord Lee, what about me is worthy of your obsession?” you asked.

You were sitting at one of the gardens within the palace walls. He had insisted on the location because of its romantic beauty.

“Then tell me, Your Highness, what about me is not to your liking?” he grinned.

“Do you wish to hear the answer of the princess or the answer of Y/n?” you raised a brow, making him laugh.

“You amuse me, Princess Y/n,” he turned his head to look at the pond.

You sighed, wondering how long you had until you could return to your residence. The man next to you was oblivious to your feelings as he rambled on about the dates he wanted to take you on. He caught your attention when he mentioned sneaking you out of the palace for half a day.

“You would really risk taking me outside of the palace?” you perked up.

He was excited to see you finally engaged in the conversation and nodded profusely. He promised to set up an elaborate plan for a smooth date. Grudgingly, you accepted his offer. Your wish to see the village overwhelmed your wish to avoid your soon-to-be consort.

The next day, a court lady secretly found you to notify you of his plans. To evade the eyes of palace maids, you were to escape through a path not commonly used. She helped you scale the wall and you froze when you saw Juyeon on the other side. You sat on top of the wall and he extended his hand for support. With a tight smile, you held his hand and jumped down.

He pulled the veil over your face to keep your identity hidden, blushing when his hand slightly brushed your cheek. He hopped onto the horse and gestured for you to do the same. Hesitantly, you held his hand again to climb on.

Using the excuse of maintaining balance, he urged you to hold on tightly. You weren’t left with an option when he sped up, prompting you to instinctively hug his waist. You didn’t have to see his face to know that he was smiling like a fool.

At last, you finally arrived at the village. Fascinated at the change in environment, you looked like a child surrounded by toys. Chuckling, Juyeon admired the view in front of him. In his eyes, you were prettier than any flower and sweeter than any candy. Feeling his gaze on you, you cleared your throat and began walking.

There was so much to look at. He caught you staring at the rows of yeot and purchased the confectionery without you asking. You immediately popped one into your mouth and he laughed when your cheeks expanded to resemble a squirrel.

“Are you teasing me?” you frowned.

“No, I am appreciating your adorable and lovely appearance,” he answered as he handed you the bag holding the rest of the yeot. His words didn’t fluster you. You simply rolled your eyes and resumed walking.

His long legs were quick to catch up with you. Enjoying your presence, he watched as you fawned over little trinkets. It was a new side of you that he had never seen.

Stopping at an accessory shop, you scanned the norigaes displayed on the table. One of them caught your eye and you held it up for a closer look. It was a beautiful pale pink color that perfectly matched your current hanbok.

“It seems a norigae is better at capturing your heart than I am,” Juyeon pouted.

“Perhaps it is prettier than you,” you shrugged.

“Is this an implication that I am pretty? To a certain extent?” he beamed.

“How do my words become that?” you exclaimed.

With another laugh, he took the accessory from your grasp and went to pay for it. You blinked at the sudden sight of his back, noticing for the first time how broad his shoulders were. When he came back to your side, he held the norigae in front of you but pulled it back when you reached out for it. He pointed at the bag of yeot and opened his mouth. Baffled, you turned around to walk away.

He caught your wrist and spun you back around. He bent down and your face stopped an inch away from his. His usual shy self was gone and he had a confident smirk on his lips.

“Does your heart not sway even at a close distance like this?” he asked. This time, he caught you off guard. When you finally came back to your senses, you hurriedly shoved a piece of yeot into his mouth and stormed off.

“Y/n, you make me laugh too hard and too much!” you heard his voice call out, making you blush crimson with embarrassment.

With your upcoming wedding looming over your head, it became increasingly difficult to communicate with the ministers. There were too many eyes to be wary of. Juyeon, of course, was one of them.

As you spent more time with him, you realized how sentimental he was. He brought you small, meaningful gifts and loved to tell you about the meanings behind each flower.

“Did you know that the plum blossom is one of the indications of spring's arrival?” he asked one day. “They can bloom as early as late March.”

“I think it is quite obvious that it is spring,” you commented, pointing at the variety of flowers surrounding you.

“My personal favorite flower is the rose of sharon,” he continued. “It is nicknamed the “immortal flower” and means “eternal blossom that never fades” because of its resilience. It regrows despite harsh conditions and even after it is damaged. Amazing, isn’t it?”

You hummed, looking for the flower he was talking about.

“I used to hope that our kingdom would take after the flower. We have survived through many tragedies and I hope that we will survive through anything else that tries to beat us down,” his words pricked you for some reason. Would your rebellion be seen as a tragedy or as a heroic deed?

“Now, I like to think that our love will be like the rose of sharon. My love for you will never fade and I will continue to pine after you despite your harsh words. Even if you hurt me, my feelings will transcend time,” he smiled. “The flower does not bloom until July. My wish is to go see them with you. Would you bless me with your presence when the time comes?”

You observed his lovestruck expression and couldn’t bring yourself to say no. Again, you were at a loss trying to understand why he was so besotted with you. His childlike innocence was almost pure to a fault in a place like the palace.

“I shall consider it if you teach me how to swing a sword,” you proposed.

He couldn’t hide both his shock and happiness. He was confused as to why you wanted to ever hold a weapon but glad that you were slowly opening up to him. Without a second thought, he agreed to your proposition.

Juyeon was full of bliss at the thought of spending more time with you. Teaching you swordsmanship would allow him to be intimate with you and he was thrilled. At your first secret lesson, his heart raced at your proximity as he guided your hands on how to properly wield the blade.

A week passed by and you quickly improved each day. Eventually, you became skilled enough to land a fake jab. Seeing your proud smile, he grinned as well.

“I guess I should be on edge now. If I annoy my princess one too many times, my life will literally be at your hands,” he joked.

“Do you regret training me?” you smirked.

“Ah, was this all a part of your plan?” he pretended to gasp. “Either to kill me off or to threaten me to obedience?”

Not finding his joke funny, you blankly stared at him. Noticing the sudden chill in the atmosphere, he awkwardly laughed.

“Do not worry, Your Highness. I will always do as you say. You do not need a sword to make me behave.” he smiled.

You hated to admit it but he had grown on you. His constant attempts to tear down your wall had finally made a crack. You had to stop before he became your weakness.

For the first time in a while, you were summoned to the king’s chamber. Expecting another reprimand, you dreaded the walk there. To your surprise, however, you were greeted with a smile he hadn’t given you in years. It kind of freaked you out.

“You called for me, Your Majesty?” you bowed.

“I hear you have been getting along wonderfully with the Chief State Councillor’s son. Finally, you are fulfilling your duty as this kingdom’s princess,” he commended.

What a back-handed compliment. You wanted to roll your eyes at his passive aggressiveness. Holding back your urges, you politely smiled instead.

“I just wanted to let you know that I will be in a hurry to complete your wedding. I need the Chief State Councillor’s support to find a suitable wife for the crown prince,” he announced.

“Is my marriage merely a way for the crown prince to find a wife with a powerful family?” you shot back.

Your question turned the mood scarily sour. You felt his anger rise as he chastised you for your impudence and disrespect.

“The crown prince is the future leader of our kingdom. He is more than deserving of the immense care, thought, and effort that goes into picking his consort. His consort will be this kingdom’s queen and will be the one to bear the next king. You are nothing but a useless girl who will belong to a different family.”

“I am still a member of the royal family, am I not?”

“You are just a good-for-nothing girl that will leave this palace soon,” he spat. “Now leave. You are dismissed.”

On your way out, you ran into the crown prince who looked at you in a way you found to be offensive. You paused your steps and turned around.

“I wish you fertility, Crown Prince. After all, the kingdom relies on your performance to produce an heir to the throne,” you said, lacing your words with venom. “I would imagine you would hate having to adopt a nephew.”

You could tell you had gotten under his skin yet again and left satisfied. You loathed and condemned your family with a burning passion. You couldn’t wait for the day it would all come to a bitter end.

While you were brooding, you didn’t notice Juyeon sneaking up on you. When you finally saw him, you nearly jumped. Your hand reached out to cover your heart, trying to calm it down. Sheepishly, he apologized for startling you.

Trying to keep you from walking away from him, he held onto the hem of your sleeve. Your heart softened at the gentle manner he treated you with. Ignoring your instincts, you let him cling onto you. Instead of making you turn around to face him, he walked in front of you.

“Will you accompany me to the garden today as well?” he asked earnestly.

Knowing that the court ladies were watching, you reluctantly accepted his invitation once again. This time, he surprised you with a bag filled with yeot. He looked so proud of himself for remembering your love for the sweet treat that it made you laugh. As a reward, he grabbed a piece for himself. Unaware of the smudge it left on the corner of his lips, he was conscious of your gaze and tried to look attractive.

“Worry not, Your Highness. You will get to look at this face every day and every night once we marry,” he assured.

Despite his wise exterior, he had a goofy side to him. He was pure and innocent—everything you weren’t. You could see why the king favored him so much.

“I do not understand why you are so eager to become my consort,” you suddenly blurted. “You know that it is just a flashy title that does not award you with much privileges. It is an empty position; you cannot hold office without a special order from the king. Do you simply see yourself as a stepping stone for your father to bring honor to your family?”

“Is my love for you an acceptable response?” he asked after some thought.

“Is it truly worth your dangerous status as the princess’s husband and king’s son-in-law? The royal family has many enemies,” you warned.

“I will be the one to protect you from such enemies,” he declared.

Was he naive or has his affection for you blinded him?

“Princess Y/n,” he said solemnly as he held your hand. “I promise to love and protect you for as long as my heart beats. No, even after it ceases to beat, I will still yearn for you. I will not demand or expect you to do the same. Even if your feelings for me are not as strong as my feelings for you, I will not blame you. But will you please give me the chance to try to win you over?”

His confession triggered an alarm in your head. He was never supposed to fall for you this hard and you were never supposed to allow him to. He had no idea how cunning and conniving you really were. Only the people in the palace knew how cold-hearted you could be. You had to be in order to survive.

You refused to give him a reply and pulled your hand away. His face fell but he forced himself to smile again. In an attempt to break the tension, he made a random comment on the weather.

After you two parted, you decided to speed things up to initiate the revolt. Once you joined hands in marriage, Juyeon would inevitably end up a target as well. If you wanted to spare him, you needed to overthrow the corrupted royal family before he became a part of it.

It was officially the day before the insurrection. To be honest, you weren’t really nervous. This was what you had been anticipating your entire life.

Yet why did you have a moment of weakness when you saw Juyeon that afternoon? He approached you with that boyish smile that did wonders to your normally rational mind. Feeling what you believed was pity, you wanted to leave him with a pleasant memory.

So you ended up convincing him to sneak you out of the palace again. This time, you were a lot more enthusiastic. You wanted to try all the pastries and insisted that he taste them too.

“You seemed to have a lot on your mind these days,” he carefully pointed out. “Has the problem that has been bothering you been resolved now?”

“It will soon,” you eluded.

You stared at the man in front of you, observing his features. He was, without a doubt, good looking. You could see why all the court ladies, palace maids, and girls of the village were so smitten with him. But you still didn’t get why he chose you to fawn over. Maybe it was because of the lack of affection you grew up with but something about having someone care for you was unsettling.

You had suitors court you before but none of them were as devoted as Juyeon. He always came off as genuine. Perhaps his sincerity was what made you lower your guard.

“I promise to lavish you with such outings if that is what makes you happy,” he proclaimed, almost making you laugh.

“Why do you make so many vows?” you inquired.

“I am a man who keeps his word and you are the only one I give it to,” he grinned. You wondered how happy he had to be to smile so often. You rarely had reasons to be smiling.

He glanced down at the table and examined the rows of binyeos. Holding one up, he held the hair pin against your hair.

“May I gift you this binyeo?” he asked.

You pursed your lips, feeling just a tad bit of guilt. You were used to being showered with extravagance but with Juyeon, it was different. There was an emotional value attached to each present.

“Only if you promise me one other thing,” you negotiated.

“Of course. I will do anything you ask of me,” he responded.

“Promise me that you will not visit the palace tomorrow,” you said sternly. He looked at you with curiosity.

“Tomorrow is… a day of mourning for me. I do not wish to see you until the day after,” you lied.

“This is the first time you have expressed your desire to see me,” he lit up at your last sentence. “I will prepare a magnificent date for when I see you over-morrow.”

You almost felt sorry for his naiveté. And you almost—just almost—felt sorry for deceiving him.

The fateful day arrived at last. You stood, taking one last glimpse at your reflection. Subconsciously, your hand reached out to touch the binyeo in your hair.

The roars of the royal guards and the clanks of combat rumbled throughout the palace. With a determined look, you left your chamber. The sword in your clenched fist dragged across the ground as you made your way to the throne hall.

When you finally busted through the door, the king sat as if he had been waiting for you.

“I should have known that this was your doing,” he scowled. “Was your luxurious life as a princess not enough for you? Could you not fight the temptation of avarice?”

“Nothing about my life was ever comfortable,” you corrected. “I always had to play along to match your mood in order to avoid being married off to an old man just out of your spite. You tried to drill your toxic mentality in me because my individuality terrified you. You made it a point to constantly tear me down. So I made it a point to see your demise.”

“You have always been this sly ever since you were a little girl. I knew I would regret your birth the moment I saw your eyes. And I was right. You are nothing but a vile bitch.”

“For the longest time, I thought I was deserving of your hatred. But I came to the realization that you simply belittled me just for being a girl. Do not forget, Your Majesty, that the womb inside me is the same as the one that bore you the crown prince.”

Mockingly, you approached the throne. It was incredible how that one seat gave its owner immense power.

“Speaking of which, why is it that only men carry on the family name?” you questioned. “Do you not realize that women are the ones who carry on the precious bloodline you always speak of? It is the body of women that conceive and grow another human inside them. It is the body of women that suffer through labor to deliver you children and nurture them to good health. The only thing you do is spread your seeds like a fruit. And then blame women for your own infertility.”

“All throughout history, it has been men who carried on the royal bloodline. What makes you think that you are worthy of special treatment?”

“Bloodline, bloodline, bloodline,” you rolled your eyes in irritation. “Do not fool yourself. It is not blood you care about but name. Men may carry on the nameline but we are the ones who give you the royal blood pumping in your veins.”

You sloppily lifted the sword to the king’s neck, smirking.

“I knew you would be the one to bring my downfall,” he glared.

“Well, how does it feel to have all your fears come true, my king?” you taunted. “You were always afraid that I would either surpass you or ruin you. Now, I will be the one to end this damned bloodline. This good-for-nothing girl will take back the royal blood that was given to you by a woman.”

With that, you slashed his neck. Blood splattered across the wall and on your face. You grimaced, wiping away the warm liquid. You were surprisingly calm in front of such a gruesome sight. That was, until Juyeon came bursting through the door.

After he had parted from you the day before, he could not get you out of his mind. Something about your eyes had been melancholic. Your words sounded like a foreshadow and it left him feeling disturbed. So he broke his promise and went to the palace to see you again. He was alarmed to see the chaos ensuing and immediately searched for you. However, he never expected the situation he stumbled into.

“P-Princess Y/n,” he stuttered, making you aim the weapon at yourself. You never intended or wanted him to witness this.

“Do not come any closer,” you warned.

“Your Highness, please. Put the sword down,” he begged.

“I cannot,” you gulped. “This is how it must end.”

“We-we can run away. Together. We can leave everything behind and I will keep you safe,” he said as he tried his best to stay calm.

You wanted to both laugh and cry. Your life was a suicidal mission. You knew from the beginning that you would not be able to survive. If you failed, you would be executed for treason. If you succeeded, you would be executed to officially end the royal bloodline.

You had to admit, you slightly wavered at one point. Juyeon’s promise to make you happy was enticing. To someone who never strayed close to emotions before, he was like a miracle. He made you feel all sorts of things that you were glad to have experienced.

“I apologize, Lord Lee,” you sadly smiled before you stabbed the blade into your stomach.

“No!” he screamed as he ran to your side.

You slowly fell to the ground with Juyeon’s arms wrapped around your body. His hands shook above the wound as he cried, knowing that he couldn’t take it out without ensuring your death. He never thought that what he taught you would be used against yourself. If he had known that this was what you planned on using your skills for, he never would have taken your offer.

“I am afraid I will not be able to go see the rose of sharons with you,” you said as a tear escaped your eyes.

Your vision began to cloud and you felt the life in you leave with every breath you took. You didn’t even realize that your hand was gripping his clothes, crinkling it. Another tear rolled down your cheek as your head fell back, your neck unable to support it any longer.

He desperately clung onto you, holding your head in his bloodied hands.

“I will bring the flowers to you,” he affirmed.

“Another promise,” you chuckled.

“This one I will be sure to keep,” he stated as his own tears fell to your face.

Next to the weapon embedded in you was the norigae he bought you the first time you escaped the palace together. He looked up to see that you were wearing the binyeo he bought you as well. He sobbed, holding onto you tighter.

“I hope to be reborn as a rose of sharon. That way, I can come see you every spring,” you whispered before you closed your eyes for the last time.

tag list: @dearseungie​ @cuppasunu​ @reverienostalgia​ @elcie-chxn​ @parfaitz​​ @lovelyutas​ @mochinyu​ @leejaeyeons​

#deobiwritersnet #the boyz #tbz #juyeon #the boyz angst #tbz angst #juyeon angst #the boyz fics #tbz fics #juyeon fics #the boyz imagines #tbz imagines #juyeon imagines #the boyz scenarios #tbz scenarios #juyeon scenarios #lee juyeon #the boyz juyeon #tbz juyeon

[kazcosmo]

haikyuu boys and their s/o being insecure about their body

a/n: this is so self-indulgent don't look at me. warning(s): body image characters: sakusa, osamu

sakusa kiyoomi

you two are shopping for clothes to wear for a celebratory party the MSBY team was throwing because of a huge win

you're gushing about a dress you thought looked really pretty

so you tried it on

but then you walk out of the fitting room without the smile you had before

mans got his brows furrowed and asks you what's wrong

was confused with what you replied

because what the fuck did you mean by "It doesn't look pretty on me, omi."

can't you see how pretty you are with literally anything you wear??

"I told you, it doesn't look good with my body type." he watches you try to hide a frown from him, loathe to ruin this shopping trip with your disappointment. You don't meet his eyes, staring at the dress instead as you try not to think about how you're gonna need to start a diet because of how nothing, nothing looks good on you. Maybe it was because you didn't look good yourself-- "I haven't even seen you wearing it." His words snap you out of your thoughts, but it doesn't stop them from returning, each destructive thought sharper than the last because he's asking to see you in a dress, and oh god, he'd see just how awful you look in it. "No." Your voice breaks when you answer, and you mentally curse yourself for it when his fingers hold your chin, tilting your head upwards for your watery gaze to meet his eyes that had a distinct softness reserved just for you. He asks you why and you break, telling him about how bad you looked in it, how bad you looked and he listens, his own heart breaking a little as he hears you pour your insecurities out to him.

"Hey, look at me, you're beautiful, alright? Prettiest girl I've ever seen." He tells you, holding you close. "It doesn't matter what you wear, what shape of your body is, because I'd still love you, you know that?" He's the softest he's been, soft in a way he could only be when you're with him. "You could wear a sack and I'd still fall for you all over again." You let out a small snicker at his last statement, and he finds himself being able to smile again. It hurts him when you think of yourself that way. Because to him, even beautiful was not enough to describe how pretty you were.

In fact, you were just so pretty that he'd bought that little velvet box a few days ago.

miya osamu

you've always known he was observant

you just didn't know how much

he watches you open a package- it's clothes you ordered online

and he listens to you as you tell him just how excited you were to try it on, all of the clothes you bought were cute, you say

and he certainly notices the change in your mood once you were finished on trying them on

and he takes note of how you've started to eat less and less since that

so he confronts you, worried about you starving yourself

and boy, was he mad when you said "maybe i need to, so i'd finally look pretty."

he wasn't gonna have any of that

"What?" The sharpness of his tone makes you flinch. He really doesn't mean it but he can't help it, not when you're being like this. Hating the way you look, again. It's not the first time he's caught you doing so, he's only just decided to confront you now because all those subtle little things he did to help you no longer worked. And he knows you'd try to deny the fact that you're hurting, the way you're doing now.

You don't bother to repeat yourself, scoffing instead as you hid your insecurities beneath a poor imitation of annoyance. "Are ya tellin' me you've been missin' out on meals on purpose?"

"So what if I am?" you huff, wanting to keep up a facade despite knowing he'd see through them immediately. He just grumbles at your response, already knowing how hard-headed you are, so he shuffles to the kitchen and you hear him rummage through the fridge, muttering words too low to be heard by you from where you were.

You follow him begrudgingly when minutes pass and you start hearing the somehow angry chopping going on in the kitchen. "What are you even doing?"

He sends a glare in your direction, "Ya haven't been eating that long that you forgot the ingredients to your favorite meal?" Your heart flutters at what he's trying to do for you, then it stops.

"I... I can't eat that, 'Samu." You fiddle anxiously with your fingers, mind jumping to pictures displayed as you stepped onto a weighing scale.

"Yes you can, and ya will or I'll have'ta make you." You shoot him a glare, finding his back facing you as he heats the pan. "I told you, I can't--"

"I know you want it. Stop denyin' yourself of what ya want, alright?" he sighs, back still facing you. "! don't care how much you weigh, m'kay? Numbers on a weighing scale won't change the fact that I love ya so eat up when I'm done cooking this for ya."

He feels you wrap your arms around him and he turns around, quick to pepper kisses all over your face. he lets you bury your head onto his chest, not minding when he feels your tears through his shirt. He just holds you, for as long as he could, before he chuckles, reminded of something cooking behind him,

"Okay, now ya have'ta let go, can't have things burnin' down in front of the girl I wanna marry. Can I?"

#haikyuu scenarios #haikyuu sakusa #haikyuu osamu #miya osamu #sakusa kiyoomi #comfort #fluff #tw . body image #haikyuu fluff #f!reader #osamu fluff #sakusa fluff

[neonacity]

HYACINTHE | CHAPTER 4: JAEMIN X READER

SUMMARY: 

Na Jaemin is far from being your typical 20 year old. Instead of slaving through college, he wastes away his hours cracking safes. Weekends that should be spent partying with friends consist of illegal races on good days and small scale bombings on bad ones. 

Na Jaemin is far from being average, unless you consider being a member of Seoul’s top organized crime family normal. There is no such thing as a sense of normality and peace in his trainwreck of a life, so when he met a barista who was brave enough to call out his dangerous taste in coffee, he was like a moth to the flame. Everything about her is normal, which means she is forbidden to him, in all sense of the word. So why, then, does he always find himself at the front steps of her shop, breaking all his personal rules even if he wishes he could stay away?

A/N + Disclaimer: this is a side story to Black Daisies, my main mafia fic feat. 0T23. While the plot is based on the main story, this can also be read as a standalone fic. As usual, this is purely a work of fiction and in no way am I implying any member of NCT to behave the way I write them here. 

TW: crimes, heists, potential death, mentions of drugs and other illegal activities.

PAIRING: Jaemin x Reader 

CHAPTER 1 / CHAPTER 2 / CHAPTER 3 / 

FIC TRAILER

MASTERLIST

"Hi. Can I have one iced americano, no sugar, with an espresso shot, please?" 

 My hands froze and hovered momentarily on the drink I was preparing as I heard a male voice say that from the counter. I didn't turn around to check who it was, but my boss—who is currently helping me man the cafe today—was quick enough to dash the pit-pattering of my chest. He hooked the order slip on the board in front of me and my eyes immediately raised to read the name there. 

"One to-go, americano for Youngho." 

I sighed internally. Whether it be from relief or disappointment though, I don't really know. A part of me wanted to be in denial of my emotions, but I realized you can only go so far if the person you are trying to fool is just yourself. 

It's been almost three months since that night that I last saw Jaemin. I wish I didn't know the exact number of days that passed since then, but I do and I couldn't help it. Every little detail of what happened was still marked fresh in my mind, especially the feeling of hollowness that exploded in my chest when I woke up that morning to see them gone.

If not for the chip on the edge of the table left by Jeno as he tried to hold a half delirious Haechan down that night, I could have easily brushed off everything as a fleeting dream. But it isn't. It is a nightmare, at least in my part. 

He really meant it when he said he would leave me alone. 

There were no calls, no messages, no visits, nothing. It was like he didn't exist at all, the past year spent with him nothing but an imagined illusion. 

We were back to being strangers again, exactly like how he wants to. If you think about it, it's selfless of him to do this, but I hate it. I hate it with everything I have. 

Why? Because now I have to live through the feeling that I'm the only one suffering from all of that has happened. I couldn't watch the news anymore without thinking about him. For heaven's sake, I couldn't even get an iced coffee order without freezing like a statue because I remember him. I hate it. I hate every single moment without him, as much as I didn't want to admit it.

I placed the plastic cover over the finished drink with a soft sigh before turning to hand it over to the customer. At least I can still manage to put out my well-practiced, service smile. 

"Iced Americano for Youngho," I called out into the receiving area as I slipped a straw on the cup sleeve. A tall man looked up and walked over to me to receive it. 

"Thank you for coming to Brick and Beans. I hope you visit us again soon," I said in autopilot, my words so well-rehearsed that I didn't even have to think through while delivering them. The customer smiled at me before giving me a wink.

"I sure will. Thanks for this, sweet cheeks." He turned and left the shop, leaving me slightly confused. 

My attention was then called by my boss who had just finished wiping down the counter. The man—who really has been more of a father figure than an employer for me—gave me a warm smile and motioned me over. 

"Can we talk? I have something to tell you." 

I briefly glanced at the clock. It isn't my break time yet, but the store is empty so I guess it will be fine. I shrugged. 

"Sure."

"Grab a cake for you and me while you're at it," he nodded towards the pastry fridge before walking towards the nearest empty table. I wordlessly took two slices of basque cheesecake, his favorite, before following him. The man has a mean sweet tooth and we both know it.

He was silent for a little bit as he took the fork to take a bite of his treat. I waited patiently for him to speak, hands politely folded over my lap.

"I'm going to sell the cafe." 

I blinked and stared. I wasn't expecting that at all. 

"You're… what?" 

He sighed and leaned back against his seat. He looked a little sad over what he just said but he managed to offer me a small smile.

"I'm getting older. You know how much I love this place because I started it with my late wife, but I really can't continue to manage it anymore. My children, unfortunately, do not have any plans of continuing the business. And they've been asking me to retire, too." 

I nodded slowly, taking the news bit by bit. 

"Do you already have a buyer, ahjussi?" 

"I do. It is kind of strange, actually. Someone offered to buy off the franchise at such a perfect time. And for a very good price, too." 

That made me smile. I've had this job ever since I started college so it makes me a little sad that it's going to have a new owner, but I really am happy for him. I just hope whoever buys it off takes care of it really well. The old man loves this place to bits. 

I felt him take a hold of my hands from across the table. I looked up and was met with a fatherly smile. 

"Don't worry. You won't lose your job. The new owners said that they aren't planning to change anything here and I told them that they had to take you with them." 

That made me almost want to burst into tears. I squeezed his hand back in return. 

"Ahjussi... You didn't have to do that. I can always look for another job." Who am I kidding? I know it will be hard for me to land another sideline especially with all the financial hiccups I am already dealing with so this is really sending me over to the edge of tears. 

"Nonsense. You are part of this business. You've done so much for this place so you deserve this. Don't worry, they said yes to my condition." 

I gave his hands another squeeze and he answered back with a fatherly pat. 

"Thank you…" 

"You're welcome. Just promise me, when you become a doctor, you'll give me free checkups, okay?" 

"No, I won't. Because you will always be healthy and won't need my help at all," I said with a wrinkle of my nose. 

That sent the two of us laughing. 

"When will the new owners take over?"

"By the end of the month," my eyes rounded with surprise and he nodded in understanding. "I know, I know. It really happened too fast. I can't turn down the offer though. To be honest it was way beyond what the business is worth." 

I sighed. "Well… as long as you are sure about them." 

"I am. For now, I'll be here for a bit with you. I just need to enjoy my last days here. So just don't mind your old man, okay?" 

I grinned. 

"Only if you promise to give me a free cake every day you are here." 

He reached out to ruffle my hair. 

"Deal."

----

It was a slow day at the cafe so my boss decided to turn down the jazz music that usually floats from the speakers in lieu of the television volume. It was an odd hour in the afternoon and I found myself smiling as I watched him flip the channels over to look for a good show to watch while I dried some mugs. Just then, the overhead bell on the door dinged, welcoming with it a pair of uni-looking kids. 

My boss looked over, but I was quick to jump to action instead. "I'll take care of it," I mouthed to him, to which he gave me a smile before turning his attention back to what he was doing.

"Hi. Welcome to Brick and Beans. What can I offer you today?"

"We'll have one dirty chai latte and one irish coffee over ice. Make it to go. " 

The couple offered their names and I nodded as I punched their orders on my POS. "Would you like some pastries to go with that?"

"No, that's all."

"Got it, you can wait over there to the side. I'll have your drinks with you shortly," I said with a smile. The girl pulled the boy over into the receiving area to continue their conversation. 

"So what I'm saying is, we gotta go. Tonight is going to be epic. The bets will be high for sure. We can get some mean cash if we put it in the right car." 

The other gave a soft snort and started drumming his fingers against the wood of the counter. I let their conversation act as white noise while I worked behind the bar.

"I don't know. You're not even sure who is going to be there." 

"Jeno is in the line-up. That at least is confirmed."

I dropped the metal scooper I was using on the floor with a resounding clang. 

The three others in the room looked over to me as I hurriedly picked it up with shaking hands. I gave all parties a sheepish look before turning on my back to continue what I was doing. 

This time, I was full-on listening. 

"If Jeno's going to be there, then it is a goner. There's no chance for others. It'll be full-on suicide," the boy said thoughtfully. The girl, however, shrugged in reply. 

"They said the others might come, too. You know, to make the run a little bit more balanced," she offered. 

"You mean the seven?"

"The Four, at least."

"Oh shit."

"Uh-huh. So I'm telling you, we gotta be there man. If we can't bet then fine, but we have to see it. It’s been ages since they actually went on lane." 

I didn't really know how I managed to finish what I was doing, not with how hard my heart was beating in my chest. I'm not sure how many Jeno's there are in this part of town, but I am sure as hell that there is only one who is a member of a seven-piece 'group.' 

"Here's your order," I said thinly as I pushed the finished drinks over to them by the counter. The boy offered his card and I took it quickly, all the while thinking of what I should do next. The few seconds of me typing away at the terminal was the longest quarter minute of my life.

"Here's your receipt. Thank you for coming and see us again," I said, my voice a little weaker than usual. The couple gave a quick bow before turning to leave, drinks in hand. 

There are two ways this could go. I could let them out of that door and have my only possible chance of getting in contact with any of the boys leave with them. Or I could call after them and…

I whipped around to call out to my boss, my figure already halfway out from the bar. 

"Ahjussi, I'll be back in five minutes, sorry. I promise I'll be quick!"

He had barely looked up when I started running out the door.

-----

"Excuse me!" 

The duo looked back at me, then at each other in confusion as I tried my best to hurry up to them without landing on my face. God, why do they walk so fast? They were just a few seconds ahead when they left the shop! Thankfully, they stopped at my call, giving me a chance to skid before them as I tried to catch my breath.

"Um… Is there a problem? We paid, right?" The boy asked me with an odd look. I waved my hand before finally trying to answer. 

"Yes. I uh—"

Well, I obviously didn't plan this out clearly. How do I say this now without sounding like a lunatic? 

"I heard your conversation earlier. You were talking about Jeno."

The pair exchanged glances again, this time tinged with suspicion. It was the girl who answered this time. 

"Yes, we were. What about it?" 

"I… I just want—to maybe know where he is? You were talking about tonight's—"

"The drag race?"

I stopped for half a heartbeat before nodding. 

"Yeah. The race. I wanted to come, too, but I don't really know the address." 

The boy cocked his brow at me in blatant suspicion. It took all of me to pull out all the basics I learned from drama class back in high school to remain calm before his withering glare. 

"You know Jeno but don't know the address? That doesn't make any sense," he said as he crossed his arms over his chest. "If you've been in one before you should have been included in the text blast."

Oh shit. 

I could feel my palms growing cold from nervousness. Still, I tried pushing on. 

"W-well, I was invited before by one of them. But then things fell apart and I started not getting any of the...texts anymore," I said, not having the slightest idea of what I am saying myself. What's ironic though was that what I just blurted out was sort of a half-truth, too.

Apparently—and miraculously—it also made sense by the look of understanding that dawned on their faces. 

"I see…" the girl trailed off. She cleared her throat and looked at her friend before glancing at me again. 

"Look, I can give you the address, but promise me that you never got it from me when someone asks, okay?" She asked. The boy looked at her incredulously.

"Are you crazy? She was already shadow banned!"

She shushed him and waved her hand off to shut him up. "Look, this is a girl thing. Don't mess with it. Just go ahead to the car, I'll take care of it." 

He scoffed but stalked off towards the direction of the parking lot. 

She turned towards me again and pulled her phone from the pocket of her leather jacket. I watched as she unlocked the screen before showing it to me. 

"Do you have your phone with ya? Here, take a photo of this address." 

I swear I could almost kiss her. I scrambled to get my phone from my back pocket and didn't waste another second to take a snap of her screen.

"Thank you so much." 

She nodded in understanding before locking her phone again and shoving it into her pocket. "Hey, a girl's gotta stand up for another. Who was it? Was it Haechan?" 

"Um…" 

She didn't wait for me to finish. 

"Really, whoever it is among them, I can't really blame you. They're all cute, but they do need to be taken down a notch when it comes to girls. Those boys," she tsked. "Dangerous." 

Oh…

Oh. She thought I was an ex-fling who wanted to teach one of them a lesson by crashing the race. I let that sink in before a frown settled on my features. 

Well, aren't you one? The devil on my shoulder cackled at me sardonically. 

"Glad to have helped though. But remember, you didn't get it from me, okay?"

With a wink, she strutted off, leaving me staring at her retreating form. 

----

I told myself I simply wanted to see him again. 

I reminded myself that for the hundredth time tonight as I parked my car on a free space by a gravel road, my eyes roaming the darkness beyond. The place looked deserted, and I had to do one last check if I really put in the right coordinates on my map before finally turning off my engine. The road beyond was wide but uncemented and to its left is a half unfinished building with metal banisters reaching out to the sky like skeletal arms. I swallowed. Every little thing about the space beyond screams danger.

Which probably means I am in the right place. 

I reached out to zip up my jacket and pulled the hoodie over my head before getting out of my car. My sneakers crunched on the gravel as I made my way towards a low wall circling the building beyond. 

Just try and take a look. You don't have to talk to him. You can keep your distance. 

I repeated that in my head again and again as I approached what I assume to be the entrance. A part of me still wants to berate myself for doing this but I am too far gone to try and play the denial game again. I want, no, I need to see Jaemin's world.

The moment I passed through a crack on the wall, it felt like I stepped into a different world. It opened up into an even wider area, the shadows of a multi-lane road behind the abandoned building beyond. Milling around is a throng of people, some smoking, others sipping on red cups on their hands. Some cars were parked against the wall I just passed, their headlights on with music booming out of their rolled down windows. 

I tried to swallow the lump on my throat as I looked around. Already, I felt out of place in the crowd, but I steeled myself to push on, my hands digging deeper into the pockets of my jacket.

"Hey." 

I looked up to see a boy around my age wave at me. He was also holding a red cup and what looked like a bundle of paper. My eyes widened as that came into focus when he got closer. 

Money. 

Wads and wads of cash. 

"You put your bets already?" He asked as he stuffed the bills into a small belt bag hidden beneath his oversized shirt. He pulled his phone out then, unlocked the screen, and looked at me, waiting for an answer. 

"Uh…" 

He gave me an odd look.

"Who are you betting on?" He asked again. 

I gave the first name I could only think of. 

"Ja-Jaemin," I stuttered.

That earned me a low whistle from him as he typed away at his phone, probably to record my choice of 'player.' "I don't know, man. Dude seems pretty out of it lately, but whatever floats your boat." He stuck out his hand to me then, and it took me a few seconds to realize what he was asking for. 

"Oh," I scrambled to grab my purse. I was in the middle of pulling my card from my wallet when I saw his face. Slowly, I put it back to reach out for bills instead. 

"Cash only." 

I sheepishly handed him the last few hundreds I have. He took them, expertly flipping through each bill to count them off. 

"First time, eh?" 

I nodded. 

I watched as he slipped the money into his already overflowing belt bag, thinking that he would leave after that. Instead he nudged his head towards the direction of the building and motioned me along. 

"Come on then. At least try and get a good look at your first race." 

I blinked in confusion but ran after him as he started walking away. 

We stopped at the front row of the half ring of people that had already gathered in front of the abandoned rafters. Just then, a huge spotlight shone over the road behind it, driving everyone to erupt in cheers. Parked in a single line at the foot of the road are five cars, headlights opening one by one.

"Jaemin's the yellow one," the boy nodded towards the one occupying the third lane. I stared. I know next to nothing about cars, but I know enough to be sure that none of the ones in front of me now are something you can buy from your run-of-the-mill auto dealer. Lowered, with shining reams, and a low motor hum that reverberated to where I was standing, I could only briefly compute in my head how much each of those customized rides must have cost. 

I heard the boy beside me snort amusedly. "Your first race and you get to see this. I'm telling you, this happens once in a blue moon," he said with a smirk. I didn't say anything, my gaze never leaving the yellow car. 

Slowly though, I noticed the crowd's noise die down dramatically the same time that a petite form walked out from the building. The woman stopped in the middle of the road and raised her hand into the night sky, a small pistol in her grasp.

Everyone has gone so quiet now that you could almost hear a needle dropping. Just then, the resounding bang of a gunshot pierced the air. Few other large spotlights turned on simultaneously, revealing the snaking road ahead that was disguised under the darkness earlier. I gasped. The roaring sound of engines blared beyond and with a new uproar from the crowd, the cars were speeding ahead, leaving trails of light in their wake. 

My heart was beating so hard against my chest as I tried my best to follow the speeding cars ahead. I was only able to comprehend the real expanse of the road the moment each ride took over its lanes—the place looked more like an abandoned air dock field more than anything else. I was barely aware of my nails digging on the palms of my hands as my eyes switched from Jaemin’s car and the others, particularly on the deep red one that he was currently toe in toe with. The space between the two were a hair’s breadth away and I could almost swear their sides would collide any second. 

That went on until a curve on the road appeared. It was the last turn before the finish line and the crowd turned wilder as the nose of each car tried its best to take the lead. I didn’t even realize that I was holding my breath until the last second when the yellow one took over the inner space of the road before swerving successfully ahead.

Everyone around me erupted in cheers. I gave my own gasp, hands covering my lips before joining the rest.

Jaemin’s yellow lambo parked on the finish line, the rest of the race participants trailing behind. I watched as his door opened, revealing his beautiful wide grin and tousled hair. He was glowing, cheeks flushed from the adrenaline. I was so caught up in the image that I barely noticed Jeno appearing from the red car, followed by Renjun, Mark, and Haechan from the other rides. 

I couldn’t hear what they were saying, but I watched with a smile as they huddled over Jaemin, playfully pushing and cajoling him for his win. They looked happy, carefree.

But it seems like they aren’t the only ones who were out there in the road. My gaze moved back to Jaemin's car when I saw his passenger seat open. As if in slow motion, a girl got out of it, wearing the same wide smile the others have. The group hooted at her as she joined their huddle. 

That’s when I felt as if time has stopped.  

The smile on my face slowly faded as I watched Jaemin wrap his arms around her before pulling her into a tight hug. 

---

A/N: Hey guys! This is going to be the second to the last chapter of Jaemin’s side story! I originally wanted to finish it in one go, but I thought it would be nice to release the epilogue on Nana’s birthday! So yes, that’ll be out on the 13th, lol. Thank you so much to those who have continued reading this side fic! <3

Chapter 5 (END)

Taglist: @negincho​, @springdaybreaks​, 

#nct dream #nct dream mafia #nct dream mafia au #nct jaemin #jaemin x reader #lee jeno #huang renjun #mark lee #lee haechan #zhong chenle #park jisung #nct angst #nct fluff #nct imagines #nct au #nct mark #nct renjun #nct jeno #nct haechan #nct chenle #nct jisung #nct-writers #nct mafia #nct mafia au

[branded-witha-j]

For @lilacprincessofrecovery

From the first moment you walked through the door, The Joker became secretly enamored by you. You were out of place, that was for sure, the club full of hooligans and women that would cut you just to watch you bleed. But you were different, like a flower growing out of concrete. The job was last resort for you and it took a while to get used to everything, the bartender position insanely lucrative but demanding. But you took to it quickly, showing up without fail to work your place behind the bar.

J liked to watch you, his crystal eyes never letting you stray from his sight for very long. You were his polar opposite, kind when he was cruel, soft where he was hard. You were a mystery to him and many nights slipped by before you were suddenly tasked with the job of delivering drinks to his VIP section. It was an odd request, your job was to make them, not deliver them, but you did as you were asked.

With a tray of drinks and The Joker's favorite bourbon, you carefully crossed the main floor, miraculously making it the roped off area without spilling anything. It was guarded heavily but they let you through without a fuss, your nerves getting to you as you climbed the steps. And there he was, the man himself, his green hair even more vibrant this close up. You felt yourself beginning to shake, not from fear necessarily, but something closer to attraction. He was dressed sharply, everything immaculate about him, and he seemed 100% uninterested in you.

One of his goons gave you a slight shove and you had to struggle not to drop the entire tray. He wasn't alone, the other drinks for his company, but he seemed even less interested in them. But they greedily snatched up what you offered, your own hand trembling slightly as you lifted the bottle and presented it to him. He didn't even look at you, waving his hand in a way of dismissal.

His main guy, the tall one that didn't talk much, leaned in and told you quietly to leave it on the table. You did what he said immediately, your hands smoothing down your apron as you asked if anything else was needed. It was the woman closest to The Joker, the one that was trying the hardest to get him to notice her, that responded, her voice nasty.

"Get lost, bitch!" She eyed you up and down disdainfully and you flinched, taking in a deep breath to say something but turning and rushing off instead. You could hear the group laughing and almost fell down the steps trying to get away. The crowd was thick and unforgiving and it felt like forever before you made it to the bathroom. It was crowded, but a stall was open, and that's where you locked yourself inside. Your throat was burning and as soon as you had some privacy you burst into tears. Her words didn't so much hurt you, but humiliated you, especially in front of him. You knew that you were making a mess of your makeup, but you couldn't stop the tears from pouring down your cheeks, not noticing that the bathroom grew suspiciously quiet.

You sniffed, the sound echoing and not swallowed up by the hum of restroom conversation, and you jumped from a knock at the stall door. Clearing your throat, you weakly told them occupied, but another knock followed. Wiping quickly at your cheeks, you smoothed down the front of your clothes and opened the door.

And there he stood, The Joker looking up and making eye contact with you. It sent a jolt of surprise and fear down your body and you had to clutch at the stall walls to keep from falling back.

"I won't hurt you."

That's all he said, as if his presence in the women's restroom was normal and required no explanation. Of course, you asked for none, stepping forward and out as he moved. You caught your reflection in the mirror and wiped at your eyes, hoping he hadn't noticed you had been crying.

"No one will bother you again." The statement was blunt and he pulled at his cuff to straighten it. Your eyes followed and you couldn't help but notice fine little droplets of red at the cuff of his pristine shirt. He turned abruptly and left you standing there before you could ask what he meant or why there was blood on his shirt.

Stunned and feeling like your heart could beat out of your chest, you turned to the mirror to fix your makeup, a smile spreading across your face. The feeling didn't leave you for the rest of the night, your good mood carried home and giving you the best dreams as you finally fell asleep.

You returned to work the following night, excited and giddy to see him, and his absence at the VIP section put a damper on things. But the following night he was back, perched above the club, looking down but never quite in your direction. More people were brought into his circle, most of them women, and it didn't take long for your jealously to take over. They were tall and thin, everyone fawning over them except for the man they had their eye on. The Joker remained indifferent to them, until one night he didn't.

A week after the interaction in the bathroom, you looked up to hand a drink over to a patron when you spotted The Joker across the way. The group he sometimes invited to his VIP section was not there, but a single woman, her hands on him in a way that was brazen and familiar. That was the night you went home and decided you were going to change, that you would be that woman one day.

You stood before the mirror in your bathroom after a shower and took inventory of all the things you hated about yourself. Your thighs were too big, your stomach too round, your arms too flabby, the list went on and on. They were all the things the woman didn't seem to have, so it only made sense that The Joker would not like these things either. These thoughts were common for most of your life, but you had felt a moment of reprieve, feeling comfortable for the first time in a while.

Now you felt sad but determined, wanting to give him something perfect, wanting to have him reach up and wrap his hand around your throat the way he did with her. Your own hand lifted and ghosted over your throat, finding it hard to bring your fingers around it like he had with her. Your hand dropped, something akin to fire in your eyes, and your resolve was made.

You purged that night, the first time in many months, and it made you feel empty but excited. The next day was the same, but you paired it with an intense workout, not stopping until dizziness made you.

Determination kept you going, even if the nights at work were starting to get harder, your energy at an all-time low. It didn't take long for others to notice, a co-worker asking if you were ok and your friendly smile and denial putting her at a temporary ease.

It was the same every night you worked, some nights he was there, some he would be absent. And as the number on the scale started to drop, it only pushed you to do more, your desire to be by his side putting you in danger. You lasted as long as you could, though you tried to ignore the pain and headaches, not realizing you were on the floor until you felt yourself lifted.

It was a Friday night, always the busiest out of the week, and The Joker had been surprisingly absent. He was always there on the weekend, that was the time the club made the most money, so you were shocked when you opened your eyes and realized he was carrying you. The music was still going, but nearby patrons were turning to watch, your face beginning to burn as J carried you down a hallway and up a set of stairs.

You were embarrassed that he was carrying you, letting out a weak protest as he shouldered his way into an office. It was elevated over the club and gave him a view of the entire floor. He must have been here the entire time and you wondered why he came to help you.

He placed you on a nearby couch, sinking down next to you and cupping your face in his hands. You were overwhelmed with the contact, eyes widening as he leaned closer to get a good look at you.

"Are you sick?" His intimidating eyes darted around your face and settled back on yours as he waited for your response.

"No, sir, I'm fine. I'm so sorry for causing a scene..." He silenced you with a finger to the lips, clicking his tongue as he released you and turned to a figure you had missed by the door. It was the tall, silent goon, and he left immediately to get some water and a wash cloth.

It left the two of you alone and The Joker turned to look you up and down, your heart pounding as he reached down to stroke across your arm. You tensed as his cool fingertips made contact with your feverish skin, stroking up to your bicep and across your collarbone. The clavicle was more prominent than the last time you were this close and his eyes remained there, slowly turning dark like an approaching storm.

"Did you do this to yourself?" His question went right to the source and it surprised you more that maybe he actually noticed what you had been doing for him. It made you smile, but the snap of his metallic teeth made you flinch and it faltered on your face. "You were perfect the way you were."

Your face fell and you couldn't stop your eyes from welling with tears. He responded to it instantly, lunging to catch you by the throat, lifting you upright. His face was dangerously close to yours and you felt dizzy with fear and desire. His hand was where you had wanted it for so long and it was perfect.

"I wanted you to find me beautiful...like that woman...I just wanted to make you happy."

He jostled you into silence and his voice was steady, eyes staring into yours unwavering as he spoke.

"You were the only beautiful, pure thing in this shit hole. Those women you want to be like so much are empty and soulless and willing to do anything for attention. That was never you."

You were shaking, a combination of fear, attraction, and hunger. What he was saying to you felt unreal, especially coming from The Joker, and you thought for certain you would wake up any moment. But his fingers pressing into the skin of your throat felt too real, the scent of his expensive cologne soaking into the fibers of your clothes too crisp for a dream. You were exactly where you wished to be and had put yourself through hell to get here. The irony of it all was that he had liked you the way you were before.

He broke contact as his guy returned, placing a tray of everything on the table next to you both. He backed away, turning back again as The Joker addressed him.

"Pull the car around and get me a table at Libre." J turned to look you, a smile slowly creeping across his face. "Their food is to die for."

#jared leto #leto joker #leto joker one shot #leto joker fanfiction #joker request #reader request #plus size request #plus size reader #tw: ed mention #lilacprincessofrecovery request

[im-thinking-arson]

Hi wow depression is a hell of a thing.

I'm sorry for the relative silence here, considering everything that has been going on in the last (roughly) year and a half it has been really hard to focus on any creative outlets. Everything has felt pretty heavy as I have been piecing together what exactly happened to myself and the people I used to share a community with.

Although my former FC is basically non-existent at this point, I feel it is appropriate to say that I no longer associate with its' leader @morganaux (sernoudenet on Twitter and formerly here) and to clarify why.

I have been struggling with what to even say about the situation. There are so many layers that I don't honestly know if any single cross-section could explain all there is to unpack. When it takes multiple people six months to explore everything they know as fact... I think that shows its not so much of a 'he said, they said' scenario as the few people who still support Morgy have tried to claim.

I feel guilty not speaking up sooner, considering this person is a member of the FFXIV community who I'm fairly sure some of my mutuals follow. Its so hard to speak out when he publicly acts innocent, like he has quietly moved on and refuses to acknowledge what he's done.

The reality feels so cold in contrast, with the knowledge I have- that he has done this multiple times before, burning down or wearing down those he has hurt with false sincerity; claiming innocence, claiming people misunderstand the significance of the intentions behind the knives in their backs, claiming he is the truest victim of the mess wrought of his own actions.

He quietly retweets fan art, cute animals, head canons, and all kinds of fandom things- but also others' tweets to identify with their own traumas- the same traumatic thoughts and feelings he incites in others through a mixture of gaslighting, lashing out, and playing the victim. He tweets passive aggressively about people he feels the victim of, (justified or not) even amid posts about his dearly beloved OC.

At this point I should just block him and try to scrape all memory of what I went through from my mind, but un-fucking-fortunately I know him too well to believe it's over when it's over. He still makes passive aggressive tweets about people he hasn't talked to in one, two, ?? years, a person who was a good friend to him for 10 years before he scapegoated them to maintain his own sense of righteousness.

Seeing as I witnessed him maintain not one, not two, not three- FOUR venting channels in his own discord, including at one point one specifically made for sh*tting on a single person, defending it's use and encouraging others to participate saying 'this is how victims cope'...

I know it's not over, and if he had a single shred of...anything... He could leverage against me he would have already tried to 'cancel' me. I'm not turning my back again to see if he decides to throw another knife.

For a long time I wanted to believe I had simply misunderstood the situation, that his intentions weren't so self-serving. The more I saw, the more I heard testimony from others that matched my own, the more I began to un-repress and process my own memories and connect the dots... And the less sense his own account made.

While I tried to maintain my friendship with him I ignored all the red flags, my own rise in anxiety, the isolation I felt. I felt so much pressure to fit into his equation, to be a supportive friend, to keep track of how he was feeling that I stopped taking care of my own mental health.

All the while he got angry for people not checking on him when he asked for space, threw a fit when anyone failed to accommodate his whims, and even accused his three closest friends of purposefully excluding him by taking screenshots without him in them or even hanging out together when he was offline..

And he would have people believe that most of the issues he was involved in centered on his friends not communicating with him. But in my case at least, nothing could be further from the truth.

I told him I felt uncomfortable with the fact his (at the time) friend had publicly lashed out at me in his discord server for stating my opinion. He suggested I work harder to befriend this person, that he couldn't and wouldn't approach his friend about it because he wasn't a FC member and only there as a friend of himself and his two closest friends.

He lashed out at a former friend (and FC mate) of mine -on my behalf- because they wouldn't stop messaging me while I was at work... And when this person subsequently put me on blast thinking I had put him up to it I mentioned considering posting my side of the story- to initially be shamed (by the person mentioned above) for suggesting I protect myself, stating it could make things worse for the people who had already publicly attacked this person...

I approached him about another former friend of his angrily ranting about a character I had though at the time they knew I was planning to RP (I had spoken about it both in-game and in a discord we all shared) because I didn't know them well enough to feel comfortable saying that made me feel uncomfortable and unwelcome in the space. I approached my former friend because I knew from experience he took things like this seriously and he was the one who had invited this character TO role play in the first place.

He reacted by telling this person he had no idea why I was upset, asked them to address an issue they had no context for - prompting them to write an apology, and then reinforced their worry that I hated them by saying I "probably disliked them since [I] hadn't written them an apology" in return. I had thought they both wanted to drop the subject because he stopped responding about the situation.

He decided the situation was resolved and kept inviting us around one another for at least four months while keeping up the illusion that I disliked this person despite me trying to remain friendly- and said nothing about the situation until AFTER he had nuked his FC and almost everyone was done with his bullshit. I had asked him to be honest about the situation and finally got "[name] thinks you dislike him" ???

(I might add more details about these situations because it's honestly much more of a mess than it might seem, but I'd probably have to write a fucking book to explain everything well in-sequence of events.)

But those examples aside, I told him up front that the favoritism he showed and my concerns being glossed over was messing with my head, that I didn't know if I felt safe in his FC, that the whole situation was making me feel like I was losing my grip on reality, that at one point feeling like I was being discouraged from defending myself was beginning to make me feel su*cidal. These are things he knew.

He reacted to this ignoring both cause and effect, ignoring me unless I reached out first or it concerned RP, continually inviting me to hang out with people he knew I felt uncomfortable with (or vice versa) and normally turning down anything I invited him to do otherwise- including several times that I offered to help him with Eden or dungeons he wanted to farm when he previously said he was free to do so. A couple of times he declined saying he was waiting to see if he could convince another friend... and then threw a fit about 'no one wanting to help him' despite declining my offer and not reaching out to me after his other friend declined (I was still online but he decided to vent on discord instead).

Behind my back he talked shit about me, enough that someone who had known him 10 years and was familiar with his behavioral patterns qualified it 'constant' bashing, whenever I came up in conversation. And even included confronting me about the three situations I mentioned above in a plan he was working on to 'fix' his FC, as if he thought I was reaching out to him to stir up drama.

Eventually it came out that the friend I mentioned in the first example was emotionally abusing his friends (and I found out later told him two of them were talking shit about him- prompting HIM to lash out at them). One of them mentioned that person had still been talking shit about me 6 months later on a private account and when I got upset that THREE people I had thought were my friends didn't tell me, I made a few jokes in poor taste (that I do now regret) about the situation to try and prevent myself from having a mental break down.

The person he led to believe I hated left the discord server at that point and he decided to divert some of the blame for (in his words) 'being worried for this person's life' -whom he had attacked over the situation- to me... blaming them leaving and him having trouble contacting them on me.

I told him if this former friend was indeed attacking people and he was so worried we needed to talk about the situation, since in other situations his response was to ignore the hurt caused. He blew up about me messaging him at work, he blamed me for every situation I had brought to his attention. He went to his mods to rant about me and sent one of them to scope out the situation in hopes they could shut me up.

This is the friend of 10 years, who quickly became concerned and not for the reasons he had hoped. They shared a few screenshots of things said to gaslight me behind my back as the conversation progressed. Eventually the other mod jumped in and, knowingly or not proceeded to gaslight me FOR him, based on what they were told. By him.

They reinforced everything he was saying in guise of a neutral perspective and my efforts to prevent a full-scale breakdown failed. I lost all grip on reality for several days- in which at some point I wrote an apology to him for accusing him of several things that were later proven true- and one thing he, himself, proved he'd lied about to the other person involved.

I spent almost two weeks in a self-imposed social break to sort everything out and attempt to cope with what I was told was reality. I fell into the deepest depression I've been in since I had to run away from home, and honestly if it wasn't for my wonderful SO and our house mates, I might have really hurt myself.

It turns out another situation had been brewing parallel to my own. People had been coming to the social mod, the friend of 10 years, with their own worries about him. Almost every. Single. Member. Including at least four people who came forward with fears that if they did a single thing that he interpreted as an insult or threat they would find themselves exiled, called out, and ranted about in a jumbled mix of truth and fictional-malice until their own friends turned on them to support his victim complex.

These four people came forward on the condition that their names be kept anonymous to protect their identity. He didn't take kindly to this, quickly demanding names so they (his mod team) could handle the situation. The mod refused, knowing he has a history of lashing out at any criticism against him and to protect those who were already afraid of bringing the problems up to Morgy.

He reacted by lashing out at this person, claiming they ruined his life, and attempting to weed out those who had spoken out against him by kicking anyone he didn't feel 'safe' being around from his FC. He posted a message in his FC discord about resuming his 'reign of terror'... Which, even if it was a joke, was in in poor taste after pruning his FC of anyone he didn't think could be convinced of his 'good intentions.'

I missed this first culling of his FC members, I assume, because I had apologized and at the time submitted to his version of events. He approached me soon after I noticed the changes in the discord and FC roster; claiming he really wanted to work things out and remain friends- going as far as to say he was so nervous about my reaction that he was shaking.

I wanted to take him at face value despite everything that happened because yeah, I did want to believe he was sincere, that he was a good friend, and that all of it had been an unfortunate misunderstanding. And at first I did until I started talking to other people who knew him and getting their side of the story. Nothing he said added up. Between first-hand testimony and over a hundred screenshots from multiple people the ONLY things that were clear and consistent were that he lied and fit his narrative to whatever he wanted to achieve.

He tried to reduce conflict by omitting information, he controlled people's perception of one another by how he spoke about them and how close he let them to himself and others, he built a support group by polarizing his friends against his 'enemies' and if anyone had a problem with him... They were wrong, and got added to the pile of 'aggressors' he had accumulated over the years, to be bashed and spit on for years to come.

He may have sensed my change in opinion when I directly asked him to help me reach out to the person who thought I disliked them-  managed to come to an understanding and we mutually apologized for the situation... Without his meddling. Or maybe when he realized I was still on talking terms with the people he had lashed out at and directly asked him why he had kicked people who did absolutely nothing to him... Or it could be that I kept in contact with the person who 'ruined his life' by trying to protect his friends from him. I don't know.

While we were still talking he tried to identify with me and bond over the feeling of loosing the FC, a group of people that despite the anxiety, and pain I had felt in the environment he'd built I did deeply respect and care about... Despite the dissolution of that group and the abuse I suffered being -at the core- his own fault. He even went as far as to say my description of the PTSD and fear I was experiencing described exactly how he was feeling, too.

As our conversations further weighed on my mental health I had to take a break from interacting with him. I was honest again, with what I was told, what I knew, and asked him for honesty about the situation... What he had said about me behind my back and why because I wanted to hear it from him. I wanted to see if he would acknowledge the harm he caused both to me and the rest of the (former) FC.

He never did, and probably won't. He asked for some time to tend to his own stress levels and mental health and then blocked me on all social media and discord, and kicked me from his FC without ever making an effort to reach out.

Of the few people who are still close to him, one of them suggested that "maybe he just decided he didn't want to be friends anymore." But after him begging to have a conversation to iron out all the facts, claiming to be so anxious about such a conversation going well that he was 'shaking', admitting that what he did hurt people and that my being wary of him was understandable, asking me -directly- to let him know if he did anything 'shady', and stressing he REALLY wanted this conversation to take place when we were both able to handle it because of how important he felt it was...

I feel like its fair to say that him suddenly cutting off all contact isn't quite so simple. He could have done that at any point. Before pointedly ignoring my concerns, before gaslighting me, before blaming me for the results of his own actions, before accepting an apology for accusing him of things he did legitimately do, and certainly before directly telling me had no real problems with me, that he it was super important to him that we remain friends, and that I deserved his honesty.

I'm not going to try and tell anyone who they should be friends with or not. Frankly, people can change and in a lot of cases experiences with individuals will be different.

But on that same note, if I had known then what I know now I might have saved myself from roughly two years of anxiety and avoided the state of dissonance I now find myself in. I still have moments where I want to doubt the things I experienced first hand. My mind is still trying to repress my own memories to cope.

A part of me still cares about him despite everything because as far as I knew, he was my friend and I am still trying to reconcile what I found to be true.

At this point I feel like I should say please don't harass Morgy if you read this, but honestly? If you have any reason to hold him accountable go for it. He needs it. And if you have any gut feelings about him or anyone in his circle please listen to it. The few supporters he still has are willing to ignore anything he has done previous to the fall of his FC and have shown they are willing to debate and accuse people who speak out about legitimate concerns involving him.

If anyone has any questions I am willing to answer them and share the proof I have.

And in the off chance anyone wants to (further) argue with me about my experiences or whether or not I suffered enough to be considered a victim, please Google some images of a hand giving the middle finger. But if after that you still really want to play stupid games? I can find you some stupid prizes.

I don't owe him my silence. Or peace of mind. The only thing I owe him is to be as entirely, brutally, honest as possible given the information I have. I think it's a fair offer considering the mind-numbing volume of honesty he -still- owes all of us.

- - - - -

I may add more onto this. Unfortunately the entire situation is a lot more complex, but I wanted to get the backbone of my own experiences out there and there is so much bullshit it can't all be seen from any one direction. A lot of the circumstantial evidence loops back into other situations and makes it hard to comprehensively represent everything on any sort of singular timeline. As I said in the beginning there is a reason it took a small group 6 months to piece it together.

I am far from the only person hurt, and the entire situation was a mess with people feeling unnerved or pressured into going along with his agenda. For the most part now that I have more context I don't blame most of the people involved for their own actions. I fully support those who can't or won't come forward about the situation whether they just want out of his drama, or are afraid to come forward.

#ffxiv community #ffxiv rp #Morganaux #Morgy #Ser Noudenet #ffxiv twitter

[cc-pdf]

Eclipse

Izuku Midoriya x Reader

Word count: 2400

Warnings: none

(Quirkless AU)

The fluffy haired boy had finally worked up the courage to ask you out, although he didn't tell you where you two would be going. He was so flustered when he asked you. His face was so red it looked like he was going to explode. He mixed up quite a few words too. Of course, you couldn't say no to those precious little eyes of his. If it wasn't for how bad you felt for him then you probably would've said no. You barely even knew him, but you knew it took him a lot of confidence to ask you out. Most of your friends had picked on you for saying yes.

Izuku was pretty shy and most definitely a nerd. His hair always looked like he just rolled out of bed. And, well, his fashion choices were.... okay. A couple people would pick on him sometimes, but not too often. You could tell he was pretty smart, but most of the time he seemed kinda awkward. As expected your friends would prefer you to go out with a popular boy that's on varsity teams and always pays attention to his looks. You would probably prefer that too, but you didn't want to hurt the little green haired boys feelings. You knew he was a pretty delicate boy.

A couple months ago your boyfriend had broken up with you. He had brown fluffy hair that always looked perfect and shining blue eyes. He was on the varsity football team of course too, his dad was the coach. He was nothing but perfect to you... well at least you thought. Your friend had set the two of you up at a football game several months ago in the fall. You liked him a lot especially because of how most girls were jealous you were dating him. It made you feel above everyone else. He was pretty nice but sometimes he would pick on other kids. Not harshly though. A couple months ago he had started to slowly ignore you. You took the hint and you haven't talked since. He found another girl. She was about 5'7 with beautiful long caramel hair. She had perfect skin and her body's curves were sure to make any boy swoon. Every time she walked past you could smell the sweet sent of expensive perfumes. She was any boys dream girl. The way he had just forgotten about you left a gaping hole in your heart. You're still not over him. His name just makes your stomach swirl in sickness.

Izuku Midoriya is smart enough not to go for bitchy popular girls, but he knew you were different. You were much nicer than the rest of them and he could tell you especially hated it when they picked on people like him. Sometimes it made you giggle though, which you felt wrong for doing. You didn't really act as cocky or stuck up as the rest of them either which confused him. He thought you were just absolutely stunning with that luscious h/c hair and those bright e/c eyes. During class he would always study your features in awe. He felt as if you were almost trapped in the world of popularity. He knew he could never get with someone that's friends with the populars, but he couldn't help but try.

It was a Saturday night and for the past half hour you had been working on getting ready. You were dressed in a comfy crew neck and a light colored skirt. You only had light makeup on, just some lipgloss and mascara, you didn't really need to impress the boy too much. You and your friends group chat was blowing up that night, they wouldn't stop teasing you about your little date. You ignored the messages, it annoyed you how petty they were sometimes, although you could agree with most of the things they were saying. You were startled as you heard a quiet knock on your front door.

"Sweetie! I think your somebody might be at the door!!!" Your mom said sweetly.

"Coming!" You yelled out from your room quickly finishing your mascara. You sighed and walked out of your room and to the front door. You slowly turned the door knob and opened it to the boy, as expected with his wild evergreen hair and his lazy outfit.

"Hi, y/n." He said almost shaking from nervousness.

"Hi!" You said with a smile. His cheeks were growing furiously red and he was trying his best to hide it. It made you giggle a bit.

"I'll be back Mom! Bye!!" You said as you quickly shut the door behind you.

"So, you never told me where we're going." You said trying to break the silence because you knew he was too scared to speak.

"Oh.. uh I thought we could go to one of my favorite places." He said shyly scratching the back of his neck.

"And where's that?" You asked curiously.

"It's a surprise." He said trying to hide his blushing face once again. He couldn't believe he was even talking to a girl like you.

"What's that you have?" You asked pointing to the long box in his hand. You really hoped he didn't get you a present. You already felt bad enough.

"You'll see." He said while starting to walk on the sidewalk.

"How long will it take to get there?" You questioned him.

"Only a few minutes." He said looking down at his feet.

You two silently walked along the sidewalk in the brisk night to your destination. It was pretty awkward but you dealt with it.

Finally you had arrived next to a cement wall. It didn't look too exciting. It was pretty confusing as to why he would bring you here. It looked like the outside of a dump.

"Here I'll help you over the wall." He said nervously.

"What? We're climbing that wall? I mean I don't usually scale walls on dates. You're nuts." You said sassily.

"Come on you can do it." He said trying to encourage you.

You ran up to the wall on your tip toes peering over it.

"Woah..." You said underneath your breath.

"Neat, right?" He said walking up next to you.

"What even is this place?" You said gazing over the wide field.

"It's the plane graveyard." He said trying not to sound too nerdy.

(Here's some pics if you don't know what a plane graveyard looks like. It's basically where they bring a bunch of old planes from wars and stuff.)

He grabbed your waist gently and helped you over the wall. He was trying so hard for his face not to turn extremely red. He then jumped over the wall after you. He led you over to one of the planes, stroking it as he walked by.

"This is the real history, not the stuff we see in those history books." He said studying the plane.

"Wait, are these real bullet holes?" You asked closely examining the holes in the metal. He smiled at you, he didn't know you would actually find this interesting.

"Yep!" He responded, walking over to the next plane.

He dragged his hand along the wing of the next plane as he walked towards it. You tried to too but you couldn't reach since you were just a bit shorter than him.

"The Navy found this one last year off the coast of Japan." He said looking at the wreckage.

"They did a corrosion study on it... after 40 years at the bottom of the ocean this is all it rusted." He said focusing on the front of the plane.

"Our grandparents sure knew how to make stuff." He admired the plane with only a few spots of rust.

"H- how do you know all of this stuff?" You asked looking up at him.

"Well, a pilot from 44, came back a few weeks ago to look at this. He stood here and looked at this thing the whole day..." He replied while taking a few steps back to take in the sight of the whole plane.

You looked at him in shock. You knew he was smart, but you didn't know he knew all of this.

"Hey! come on." He said jumping into the plane.

"A- are you sure we're allowed to do that." You said starting to get nervous.

"Yeah, nobody ever comes here anyways." He said waving you over.

You sighed and jumped into the seat next to him.

He opened the slim box he had been lugging around, only to see a small telescope.

"Here." He said handing it to you.

You gently took the telescope into your hands. You looked up into the dark night sky through it.

"Oh my god... look at all those mountains up there." You said fascinated while studying the bright full moon through the telescope.

"And valleys, canyons, and planes..." He trailed on.

"What's that thing up there that looks like a... star sapphire? What's that?" You said studying the different sections of the full moon.

"An asteroid hit there... it made a crack in the moon 100 times the size of the grand canyon." He said looking over at your precious face.

"And... on the right is the sea of tranquility. The first space ship from earth landed there. The day I was born..." He said looking back up at the sky.

"That's why you're so into astrology, right?" You said passing the telescope back to him.

"Astronomy." He corrected you softly.

"No, well up there it's just a future world..." He said looking into the telescope.

"By the time I'm my Dads age, people will be living there, and working. Maybe even us..." He continued on, placing the telescope on his lap looking back into the shining stars.

(Queue music. I would suggest listening to Eclipse by Pink Floyd right now.)

You looked over at him and gazed into his dark green eyes. You couldn't help feel fascinated by the way he explained those things. You weren't much of a person to be interested in space, but there was something about the way he stated these things. Were you falling for some nerd you barely even knew? You questioned yourself. It couldn't be. But nobody had ever done something like this before for you. It was a whole new feeling. For sure your old boyfriend would've never gone out of his way to do something like this, let alone even know anything about astronomy.

You two sat in silence for a few minutes gazing up at the thousands of stars in the late sky. You looked over at him and smiled a bit. He jumped a little when he realized you were looking at him.

"Oh, sorry." You said looking away.

"The moon, it looks different now... It's not as mysterious or romantic." You said playing with your hair.

"Well I'm sorry I ruined it for you." He said quietly looking down to his feet.

"You didn't ruin it, you just changed it, I guess..." You said staring into the big moon.

"You know... I had never actually studied the sky like this. Because of you, I think I have a whole different perspective on it now..." You said still admiring the different sections of the starry sky.

"What do you mean by perspective..." He asked in shock. He didn't know he would have this much of an effect on you.

"Like, I didn't know there was so much to look at... It's actually pretty interesting." You said pointing to each star trying to count them.

He gently smiled at you.

"You're different." You said.

"W- what?" He said confused.

"All of my friends think you're just some little loser. They pick at you all the time. Before this I thought you were just some random nerd that cared way too much about school." You said with a saddened expression.

"Yeah... I know." He said looking down, scratching the back of his neck.

"You're not though..." You trailed on.

"W- what do you mean?" He stuttered.

"You're actually pretty interesting. Now that I realize it... there's a lot more to you than what people say. You're pretty cool, you know." You said looking down at your feet.

"Oh, I- I didn't know you thought I was c- cool..." He said still stuttering.

"Could you ever count how many stars there are up there?" You questioned him, changing the subject.

"No." He giggled at you.

"Actually, theres supposed to be a solar eclipse happening soon... maybe we could go see it." He said turning around to look at your e/c eyes.

"That sounds pretty intriguing... How about, make it a date." You said looking over at him. You were actually pretty interested in him. He was much more than you thought before. Your friends were all wrong. Even if he is just some nerd like they all say, he really knew how to make you feel... special.

His eyes had lit up from your response.

"Uh... yeah sure." He said rushing his words while looking away trying to hide his rosy cheeks.

"Oh my gosh... it's already 9..." You said while looking down at your watch.

"Wait... that's a pretty nice watch." He said looking over to see it.

"Oh yeah... it was my grandfathers. Actually he was in the Vietnam War." You said moving your finger around the rim of your watch.

"Well, he must of been a great man." He said while jumping out of the plane onto the dirt.

You two had walked home that night, holding hands, while still studying the night sky. That night he had changed your whole perceptive on humanity. From now on you wouldn't focus on what everyone else said about someone. If you wanted to know they type of person someone was you would get to know them, not base them off of what everyone else said. Although your friends weren't thrilled by the fact you were falling for the schools so called loser, he was nothing but perfect to you. That night Izuku Midoriya had faded all of the thoughts of your old boyfriend away. He was different from the other boys... in a good way.

AAAA okay that was kind of cheesy but I hope you liked it. :)

#mha izuku #izuku x y/n #izuku midoriya #izuku midoria x reader #deku #deku x reader #deku x you #deku x y/n #izuku x reader #mha #mha drabble #mha x reader #mha x you #mha x y/n #bnha #bnha x reader #boku no hero #boku no hero fanfic #mha fanfic #my hero academia #my hero academia fanfic #my hero academia x reader #boku no hero academia #quirkless izuku #quirkless au

[numbaoneflaya]

You can count on me to pull up with a thousand of questions sbdhdh. A3, A22, C5, D3, F3 for Jilly ; A18, A23, B9, C1, H2 for Nirn ; A5,B9, C8, D1, I5, for Thurwen ; A9, A13, C1, E8, and G6 for Valkya? 😏

A3, A22, C5, D3, F3 for Jilly ;

A3.Do they have any emotional or psychological conditions? Are they aware of it? Do they try to treat it?

Shawty got that stockholm syndrome in a way. She is…. Sometimes aware of it, though she wouldn't call it that any more. Maybe at first in the basement she was more aware, but now that she can come and go she thinks its a thing of the past. tries not to dwell on it. Kind of in a “well its literally not that bad its kind of fun its kind of romantic were just quirky <3” way, will get mad if someone insists she has stockholm or that the relationship is fucked. Will get enraged and upset on Vincent's behalf, probably cry and yell at you.

A22. Is your OC intended to be found generally attractive? Unattractive? Average? Is there a reason why?

I intended her to be fairly average, maybe kind of cute. It's generally the way she dresses/acts in public that draws attention, not her looks. I tend to make most of my ocs on the average scale besides a select few.

C5. Do your OC’s morals and rules of common decency go out the window when it comes to those they don’t like, or when it’s inconvenient? Aka, are their morals situational?

Good question…. Jillys morals are pretty simple- always be kind and nice, murder and hurting other people is bad, and you shouldnt lie. She sticks to those pretty strictly herself despite the situations she gets put in, often to her own detriment. But she doesn't always put a stop to those behaviors from the people she surrounds herself with, so she's sort of accomplice to bad acts of violence just by not snitching. So somewhat situational? She tries not to think about it.

D3. How comfortable are they with the idea of death?

Not comfortable! She hadn't seen a lot of it before her early twenties and was always sort of sheltered. dead fish are flushed down the toilet bcs they go to the ocean to live again, right? Thought cows and such all died of old age peacefully before they were made into burgers until she was like… twelve. 💀Won't kill mice and other critters despite her prey drive bcs she would feel too bad. And this is just for animal death, she's much more uncomfortable with human death. Also a thing she tries to ignore.

F3. Could they ever live in a “tiny home”?

God no. She hates small spaces unless she's hiding in them and tiny homes have no room for all the shit she stashes! No room for zoomies, or climbing on the furniture, or wrestling around on the floor. It would be filled with junk within a week.

A18, A23, B9, C1, H2 for Nirn ;

A18. Do they get jealous easily? Do they feel bad if they do?

He's never had much to be jealous of, as he's never really been over involved in romantic relationships. They were usually mutually beneficial and somewhat clinical in nature. Hes also pretty sure of himself and his value as an asset and lover. If he finds someone who peaks his interest and they become an item though, he might get jealous if he catches them flirting with other people. Hell be peeved at first but know flirtation in business has its value, so to make himself feel better might flirt with someone else while they are nearby. Make a game of it, see who wins.

A23. Does your OC place much importance on their appearance? Do they feel confident in it?

Appearances are crucial to him and spends a lot of time and money making sure he looks his best. He needs to appear above the rabble and impenetrable, dressing well and having immaculate posture and an air of both grace and otherworldliness.

B9. What kind of humor does your OC like the most? Slapstick, ironic, funny sounds, scare pranks, xD sO rAnDoM…

Definitely not one to find fart jokes funny. Very rarely laughs genuinely or full heartedly, he keeps all his expressions of emotion close to his chest. Sharp sardonic wit is appealing to him in the right circumstances, even a jab directed at himself can make him chuckle if it's well formed enough. Irony almost always gets him, even if its dark irony or gallows humor. Bit of a hard nut to crack. Would laugh enough that hed have to cover his mouth with his hand if he were to see Felix fall face first into mud, though. More often than not you can tell he finds something amusing by a gleam in his eyes and a slight squint.

C1. Does your OC have a moral code? If not, how do they base their actions? If so, where does it come from, and how seriously do they take it?

Well he used to have a real moral code :/. Now I mean…. The ends justify the means. By any means necessary. He considers his family's needs first, then the good of the world, then any individual in the world. Has ordered executions of entire families, had babies stolen and sent away, sent armies to certain death knowing full well they would all die, commanded individuals be tortured for information, sacrificed many in what he considers to be a game of chess where he is the player and others are the pawns. He finds senseless violence and savagery to be unforgivable, but if violence has a sense and purpose to employ it, then he will do so.

H2. Is your OC a thoughtful partner, in whatever aspect of that you want to cover?

Nirn tends to be a very thoughtful and attentive person in general, just for the wrong reasons lmaoooo. But with a lover? He's going to be utilizing that to show them how much he cares and using his powers for good. Mention you like a certain fabric while shopping one time and then complain your favorite tunic has a wine stain in it several months later, he's going to be taking your measurements for a new one in your preferred material without a moment's notice. Very keen on picking up moods, expressions and tone. Also has a very good memory. He doesn't really think about it but gifts are how he shows his love. Also a great attentive listener.

A5,B9, C8, D1, I5, for Thurwen ;

A5. Are they good at handling change in their life?

I would say so, yeah. Shes been used to things constantly changing since she was little and has had little to no control on outside influences. Shes also not one to over think about the past and lament, shes more of a one foot in front of the other, the only time is the present kind of gal. Of course large changes like becoming a warden were a bit more severe, but shes mostly able to think in the present as long as she has immediate problems to deal with.

B9.What kind of humor does your OC like the most? Slapstick, ironic, funny sounds, scare pranks, xD sO rAnDoM…

Slapstick is always gonna make her laugh as long as nobody gets seriously hurt, even if its her own ass tripping into a tree. Not a fan of scare pranks, 0/10 recommend trying to scare Thurwen. You will end up with a broken nose at best and an angry elf. Likes puns, but she's the one to groan at them and try and hide the grin spreading across her face. Gallows humor but only if its her in the gallows, otherwise doesn't find it funny at all. If a little kid calls someone a fartcicle she will be tears in the eyes giggling, which is hard when your warden commander and everyone looks toward you to be serious and mature gyshsdhdfsghsd.

C8. Is your OC more practical or ideal morally? I.e., do they hold people to high expectations of behavior even if it’s not realistic for the situation, or do they have a more realistic approach and adapt their morality to be more practical?

She definitely holds herself to moral ideals and is very hard on herself, but has realistic moral expectations for others. She can understand self serving and people only wanting to survive and she will only give people a little bit of shit for it, no one's perfect. But then she expects herself to be perfect and berates herself constantly for not living up to the hero of ferelden warden commander ideals.

D1. How religious is your OC? What do they practice, if anything? If they don’t associate with any religion, what do they think of religion in general?

Atheist ever since her mom died when she was a kid, but now Shes in a weird mixed state ever since the urn of sacred ashes where shes like. fuck the maker, but Andraste is cool I guess. So respects/believes in the power of Andraste while thinking the maker is a piece of shit and the chantry sucks ass. Even she doesnt know what she really believes, but she did see the ghosts of Andrastes disciples and Shartan, used her ashes as healing salve, killed an old god, etc. So shes been in a weird place recently, crisis of faith/non faith pretty continual.

I5. Are they a good cook?

I mean…. She can cook basics. Shes been feeding herself and the alienage kids since she was old enough to walk so she knows how to get protein and make things edible. Does it taste good? Probably not. She didnt see her first spice till she was 17 years old, but she can skin a rabbit in seven seconds.

LA9, A13, C1, E8, and G6 for Valkya? 😏

A9. Does your OC make a lot of excuses? For themselves? Others?

She tries to excuse bad behavior of herself or others a lot, yeah fgdgdsfhdhs. Mostly she doesnt have to make excuses for herself because she can wholeheartedly be like “yeah i fucked up but whatever im sexy and large and awesome and everyone loves me 🙄whatever baby” and when other people fuck up shes pretty sympathetic even though they are not as large nor as sexy. Shes very used to forgiving and excusing herself its totally alien to her when she really fucks up and is suddenly like wait… valkya…. Did bad?? What is this feeling. Shame?? Guilt?? IMPOSSIBLE.

A13. Does your OC have any phobias? If so, where did they come from?

She hates those giant bugs in morrowind and valenwood a whole fucking lot but I wouldnt exactly place it as a phobia. Those huge mosquitoes and haorvers got no respect but she really hates the morrowind bugs ever since they knocked her over and jumped her while she was pants down peeing drunk as hell in the sand :/ never forgave. Never forgot.

C1. Does your OC have a moral code? If not, how do they base their actions? If so, where does it come from, and how seriously do they take it?

She was raised in a healthy household that tought the basics, prety much “harming others needlessly, stealing, torture, rape, dessecrating the dead, being selfish and not doing right by others, etc etc all basic bad things” are her morals. Her morality is basically treat others how you want to be treated. And if they treat you badly, then have fun beating the shit out of them to show everyone else not to fuck with you. Its a pretty nordic morality in that way. Her morality is also since she was ‘blessed’ with being so large and strong, that she has to also look out for the little guy who cant protect themselves. So If someone treats them how valkya wouldn't want to be treated, then beat the shit out of the person harming them to show them the little guys got backup. Her parents raised her to be a hero and thats p much how she sees herself, which has its benefits and its fuckin problems.

E8. What’s one of your OC’s biggest regrets?

Fucking up Dem and Dariens relationship for sure dude :/ valkya always gonna be sulking over that one. She doesnt regret becoming a vestige, even though it would have made her so much happier not to be because it ended up saving so many people and the world. She regrets not spending more time with Naryu, regrets always having other life saving business she had to run off to, regrets not cherishing the time they had together. Regrets not telling Lyris how she feels, either. Regrets not being able to save as many people as she should have, regrets she wasnt stronger in coldharbor and didnt break out herself. But she tries not to think about it <3

G6. Do they have any favorite childhood memories?

When she was seven she once spent two months training to hold her breath underwater, because her cousin always held it longer and won the gold bet. She trained for hours almost drowning in the river until she could comfortably hold it for up to three minutes. During the next holiday when they all got together again the competitions were on and they both went under- her cousin won, holding their breath for four more minutes before they decided to come up. This was the first lesson she learned that shocked her world view- you always need to know your opponents capabilities. (after she lost 26 gold in the bets, her mother later had to inform her that her cousin was an argonian.)

#thank u beloved this was good to go thru while in class when i should have been paying attention gfhsdhds #valkya #jilly #nirn #thurwen #the ladies and the gilf #presented without evidence; valkya be stupit kinda :/ #HOW DO U DO URS SO FAST... SUPER POWERS

[chokemeanakin]

Would you consider writing something short and sweet about Obi with a fellow jedi? Like maybe he comes back to the temple exhausted after a tiring mission and thinks about confronting his partner about what they're doing not being ok but then the moment they're alone she's like "I made you tea! And food! Let's cuddle!" And he thinks 'Nope, I'm definitely not ready to give this comfort up yet'

Thank you for the request! I’ve never written an obi-centric fic before but I actually really loved doing this. I hope you like it! ❤️

Masterlist

It’s You- Obi-Wan x gn Reader

Obi-Wan walked down the ramp of his ship behind the rest of his clones. It felt good to be back on stable ground, the safety promised by the Republic’s capital where the Jedi Temple was swarming with military personnel. However, an overwhelming sense of dread had slowly been building during his flight home, replacing the pride of his victory on Won’kito with anxiety and disappointment.

He had almost blown the mission.

The bomb had been set, and the droids were booking it out of the city. There were 60 seconds left before the 212th battalion realized the city would soon be dust and rubble, and Obi-Wan was the only one who could reach through the ray shield with the force in order to disarm the bomb.

By the time he reached it, there were 15 seconds left. Citizens were being rushed out of the city as fast as possible, but there was just no way they’d make it. They had been blindsided, set up, distracted, and now they were too late.

When Obi-Wan got the code, there were 10 seconds left. He couldn’t get through the ray shield. No matter how hard he pushed and prodded and willed the force through, he kept hitting a wall.

9...8...7...

He almost left.

As the bomb flashed red with every second it counted down, his mind flashed to you. How devastated you’d be when you found out he didn’t return from his mission. How miserable you’d look in all black, standing at his funeral and trying to hide your soul-crushing grief. How you’d never forgive him for leaving so suddenly, and how much he didn’t want to say goodbye.

As the numbers flashed 6, then 5, then 4, Obi-Wan considered jumping through that broken window and scaling the building rooftops to get as far away from the blast as he could. To save himself, but doom everyone else. The thought was gone in a blink, but his bones were shaking, muscles tensing, ready to carry out his selfish plan.

It was wrong.

3...2...1...

By some otherworldly blessing, he had finally managed to push through the barrier and enter the code. The bomb screamed as the explosion circuits began, then choked off once they had been broken. Obi-Wan felt his head rush with oxygen-deprivation— he’d been holding his breath for too long, but he couldn’t move. He was shaking too much.

It was only when the ray shield died and the bomb went dark did he dare to breathe again. He clutched at his chest, gasping, feeling for his heartbeat as if surprised it was still there. Then Cody’s voice came over his com, congratulating him on a job well done.

Now, he was back on Coruscant and his legs were just starting to stop trembling. It was easy to put on his brave mask for his soldiers, to pretend like he had everything under control all along. He was good at putting up masks, at hiding his feelings. He had hidden his feelings for you from the Council for so long, after all.

But deep down, he knew that had to change. Jedi weren’t supposed to feel, they were supposed to let go. How could he preach this to Anakin at every turn if he could not do so himself?

His attachment to you had gotten the best of him, and had almost caused the destruction and death of an entire city. He had almost succumbed to the pressure of your love, almost doomed thousands of people just so that he could live. Why him? Out of everyone, why should he have gotten out alive?

He knew what he had to do, but it didn’t stop him from dreading every second of it. Each step toward the room you two shared in the Jedi temple was like a step toward the execution block. His limbs felt numb, but his chest was burning. He cursed himself for getting into this mess in the first place, knowing how wrong it was yet being unable to ignore his undying attachment to you.

Feel it, and let it go, Obi-Wan chanted to himself over and over again. His heart was already breaking for you. Your face when he’d tell you you had to stop this thing you had going. How devestated you would be, his precious little fawn, broken and crying and hurting all over. All because of him.

He opened the door slowly, swallowing the lump in his throat when he glanced around the corner and caught sight of you. You were in the kitchen, hair tied up in a sloppy bun, pouring over something on the stove with the utmost concentration. Your tongue was sticking out in that adorable way it always did when you were thinking hard, and you were wearing one of his shirts.

He leaned against the doorway, watching you for a moment. The last few seconds of peace and happiness on your face... oh, how it would kill him to see you crumble.

“Obi-Wan?” You suddenly looked up, peering around the corner at the door. Your face brightened when you saw him. “You’re back!”

His heart dropped to his feet. You came bounding up to him, a mug of tea in your hands, face beaming with excitement. “I missed you so much! Come in, you must be so tired and hungry. I’ve been making your favorite dinner all day, oh and here’s some tea...”

He let you drag him to a chair on the island where he sat before a bubbling pot. The smell was heavenly, and the mug of tea warmed his stiff hands. He was so used to coming home to a dark, empty apartment before you... he hated the thought of going back to that after he let you go.

“Are you okay?” You asked him, face falling when you noticed his silence. Obi-Wan took a deep breath, inhaling the steam from the mug to try and clear his mind, to think of the words he had to say, to force them out of his mouth—

“I’m okay.” He finally managed, chest aching. He brought his hand up to tuck some flyaway hairs behind your ear, lingering there to cup your cheek.

“You’re just very quiet. And... you look sad. Did the mission go well? I should have asked when you arrived. I apologize.”

“It’s alright, the mission was a success,” Obi-Wan said. But I need to talk to you about something... about us.

He couldn’t get the words past his lips. Not when your cheeks were flushed that perfectly pretty pink, your heart beating with a languid bliss, so happy to see him, so enamored with his presence, so in love. It would be a crime in itself to rip that away from you.

“I’m so glad you made it back unharmed,” you covered his hand on your cheek with your own, fingers dwarfed in comparison to his. His heart melted at the sight. “Now sit back and drink your tea. The food will be done in a moment— you must be starving— and then we can go lie down and rest because you look so exhausted, and I’ve already got the bed all made up and the fluffy pillows are on your side this time...”

Obi-Wan leaned forward and pressed his lips against your own. So warm. So sweet. So his. He wanted nothing more than to hold you, nothing more than to keep tasting you like this.

His mind was screaming at him to let you go, to break away and tell you that you needed to stop seeing each other. To break off this love before it became unbreakable. But it was too late. His heart soared for you, and the kiss sealed his commitment to you.

He did not want to give this up.

Not just the tea, and the food, and the warm welcome home after a long, hard mission. It was you. Every atom in his body reached out for you, called for you, and he was weak. A true Jedi would not have fallen victim to his feelings so easily, but he had never been the perfect Jedi to begin with, had he? No matter how hard he tried, no matter what mask he put on, he could not deny the hold you had over him. There was simply no way he could follow through with it, no way he could turn you away now.

“Thank you, darling,” Obi-Wan whispered against your lips. His hands gripped your waist, pulling you flush against him, and he basked in the soft, warm feeling of your body against his. No, he would never give this up. “I love you.”

#obi wan kenobi #obi wan x reader #obi wan fic #obi wan angst #obi wan fluff #obi wan x you #obi wan x y/n #star wars fic

[guessimjoiningthespidermanfandom]

It Takes Two to Tango

Peter Parker x bisexual!reader

Peter Parker x fem!reader

Peter Parker x black!reader

Peter Parker x villain!reader 

Warnings: Language, guns, knives, violence, self destructive behavior, mentions of mania and depression, mentions of bipolar disorder, descriptions of tattoo guns, slight slut shaming maybe, a bong, allusion to corrupt government, mentions of prostitution, mentions of parental neglect, and mentions of piercings.

Word Count: 6.5k

Songs: Drew Barrymore- SZA, No Role Modelz- J.Cole, Baby Blue- Action Bronson, Little Dark Age- MGMT, Gansta- Kehlani, Shutter Island- Jessie Reyez, Good Days-SZA, King’s Dead, Kendrick Lamar, and Saint Bernard- Lincoln.

“Which was odd because usually he talks the most on these rides. After we got over the initial awkwardness of the whole fire and Vulture thing we fell back into the way of things. Well if he was going to play this game I would too because what’s that saying? It takes two to tango.”

A/N: Hold on tight a lot goes down and it’s not looking up anytime soon. 

Series Masterlist  Previous Part   Next Part 

I was running faster than I’d ever had before the heels I had been trying on? Not helping my case. Since this is apparently my brand now I backed myself up onto the edge of the building. 

I had a gun trained on me.

“Come with us Y/N please,” 

“No! Who the fuck is Y/N?”

“Don’t play dumb ma’am we’ve done extensive research on you and we see you’ve done the same with us,” 

I rolled my eyes.

“Fuck you! I have no idea what you’re talking about and this is harassment,”

“You’re cornered there’s no way out,” 

The man wasn’t going to shoot me. No one would’ve come all the way out here and have chased me for this long when they had a gun if they were really planning on killing me. They would’ve done it already. And if this was who I thought it was I was not going with them. 

“Just come with us, we’re on your side, we’re not trying to hurt you,” That sounds exactly like someone who was going to hurt me would say.  

“Yeah says the man who has a gun aimed at me,” I rolled my eyes. 

“This is simply a safety precaution, just make this easier for everyone,” 

I looked back at him before making my decision. I was getting the hell out of here now. 

I bent backwards towards the street underneath me. Instead of free falling I put my hands behind me going into a backbend kickover grabbing onto the ledge. 

Using my legs as a propeller I launched myself closer to the wall. I’d gotten lucky and the walls had protruding bricks that I could scale. 

The man who I think was from SHIELD was hot on my tail. So I had to move fast. I scaled my way to the nearest balcony jumping into the pool in a leap of faith. 

I’d made it in thankfully. Guess my story wasn’t over.

Then I had to run. I was running down the streets. Thankfully this was New York and no one would bat an eye at someone who was drenched head to toe running down the street. They’d just pass me off as another nut job and go about their day. 

So much has happened I feel like this is an episode of shameless. You really were too busy to tune in last week you skank ass bitch? I almost died twice and I still managed to check in, whatever, just pay attention to the next clip. 

“So that building exploded and that loud siren noise I think I told you about was going off in my ears and when I left the plane with Vulture and Spidey were fighting by a crashed plane and Vulture put too much power onto his wings and they were gonna blow up. And I got mad like fucking top of the anger iceberg mad. So when I was like on the verge of blacking out like fucking fire came out of my hands and disintegrated those wings. Like they turned to ash before my very eyes. Then I had a panic attack of course and that’s pretty much it,” 

“Uh… I just called you here to tell you I found something about that SHIELD guy who came after but, I’m glad you’re okay,” Felicia told me.

“Sorry… I guess I got too excited,” 

“What'd you find?” I moved over to her in her spinning chair. 

“Look and see for yourself,” She moved out the way.

I sighed plopping down onto the small twin bed.

“I know what you’re doing,” I said, picking up a piece of popcorn. 

“What are you talking about?” Carmen asked as if she was genuinely confused. 

“You’re trying to trick me into eating and sleeping, which is totally not fair because if I want to wallow in self pity I should be able to,” 

“I know what happens when it gets bad and I’m not letting you get there again,”

I sighed again. She is always claiming that she sees herself in me and she wants me to be the best version of myself. 

She acts like since she’s one year older than me that she’s my mentor or something.

 Plus she also thinks I have an undiagnosed and untreated bipolar disorder so who’s to say everything else she says isn’t a lie also. 

We were watching a Wrinkle in Time and I knew I was going to cry when the girl’s dad came back. I always did and I didn’t want to cry today. 

“Wanna go do something?”

“Sure... Where are we going?” 

“Out,” 

I tried on a lot of Carmens clothes and ended up wearing the most extravagant outfit I’d ever worn. I felt extremely giddy for no reason in particular. I was wearing a puffy skirt and corset. We were walking about the streets of Brooklyn with no clear destination in mind just talking.

“I just find it funny that all you have to do to be famous on Tiktok is be white and skinny like smoke a cigarette in a subway station or some shit,”

“Why don’t we get famous?” 

“Now how would we get famous,” I poked. 

“I’m offended that you don’t think we could,” She stopped on the side of the street. 

“Gimme your phone,” She demanded in a kind way.

I plopped it into her palm. 

I’d honestly forgotten where I was for a second because I’d zoned out yet again. She put the phone back in my hand and she had made a Tiktok account for the both of us. 

She was only checking to see if I liked the account name because she took the phone right back afterwards.

I didn’t mind. 

“I should get a tattoo right?” I asked, putting another one of the chamoy gummy worms in my mouth. 

“How many do you have now?” 

“I think like twelve?”

“And that’s not enough for you?”

“Noo! I like the ones I have. I just want a bigger one.” 

“Then do it?” 

We were actually in walking distance of a tattoo parlour I just didn’t trust them. Never cheat on your nail tech or hairstylist and it goes the same for tattoo artists. 

Two subway rides later we were in Queens. I walked up to the front desk and was about to ask for my go to artist but she walked out the back room before I had the chance.

“Y/N, ‘s that you?” She asked. 

“The one and only,” I twirled around in my dress. 

“This dress is very different than your usual style but I can’t say I don’t love it,” She pulled at the fabric then glanced up her eyes, lighting up in recognition. She gasped “Is this Carmen?” 

I nodded “My bad lemme introduce you to each other. Carmen this is Enchantress and you already know Carmen apparently,” 

I’d played a Russian roulette sort of thing with my tattoo Pinterest board just clicking one with my eyes closed. Then there was the buzzing of the gun moving along my skin. Puncturing it in a way that felt extremely bittersweet. 

I never understood people who said tattoos hurt. I could always barely feel them. They felt like a simple scrape over your skin. Also at this shop they still give you the wrapping for your tattoo but it’s filled with ink still so you can move it around in the bubble. I like messing with the ink sack. I think that’s why I come here so often.

I was admiring the tattoo on my lower abdomen in the mirror when I was startled.  

“Wait!” Enchantress exclaimed, starling me “I just realized you got a piercing. Come here,” She beckoned. 

She turned towards me 

“It’s actually super straight, did you do this?” 

I opened my mouth to respond when Carmen answered for me.

“No, some girl did it for her in her school bathroom,” I really gotta stop telling her everything. She’s always snitching on me.

“I want to be mad but I can’t because it actually looks super healthy,” She titled my chin up to get a better view “However if it gets infected I’m beating your ass,” 

We exited the shop after I paid well, Carmen paid but I’ll pay her back. There was a pretty hefty discount too, because Enchantress loved me apparently, I loved her too. She’s an older sister figure like my role model. I mean she was when I was a few years younger. I think I’ve grown out of role models.

I felt a sharp uncomfortable sensation in my body which sort of felt like those anxiety brain zaps but located in my abdomen. 

I looked behind me and there was something off about this man who was standing a few feet behind me. I accidently made eye contact with him and he bolted off. 

Weird. 

“Y/N are you even listening to me?” 

“Huh,” I turned in Carmen’s directions “Sorry what'd you say?” 

“I was saying that since you got a tattoo, I’m gonna cut and dye my hair,” 

“Cool what color?” 

“I don’t know yet let’s go just to CVS ‘nd decide there,” 

I was sitting on the kitchen counter behind the chair Carmen was in as I applied the bleach to her hair singing along to the song playing. 

Why is it so hard to accept the party is over?

You came with your new friend

And her mom jeans and her new Vans

I set the bowl of hair bleach onto the counter hopping down to get ready for my favorite part of the song. 

And she's perfect and I hate it 

I sang it loudly moving my hands around like I always do releasing my energy. It was almost like therapy. Who am I kidding SZA is therapy. 

I used the bathroom and I couldn’t find soap. I looked under the cabinet and found the soap. I also found something else I wasn’t expecting to see. I brought it back into the kitchen with me.

“You have a hello kitty bong?”

She grabbed it from my hands examining it. 

“Well actually I stole it from my sister,” 

“No way, this is Dinah’s? Because she just got ten times cooler,” 

“All I know was she got back in college, then she just stopped using it,” 

I finished Carmen’s hair which for some reason she trusted me enough to cut curtain bangs for her honestly they didn’t look too bad. It was just very time consuming. 

“Okay but are you sure, how’d you know he’s gay?” Harry questioned leaning back to look at the kid again. 

“Just watch,” I raised my voice just enough for him to be able to hear me “Charlie!” 

He turned around as if he were stunned that I was talking to him. 

“Who me?” He asked.

“Yes you,”

“Oh,”

“So can I ask you a question?”

“Yeah sure I guess…”

“What’s your favorite Percy Jackson book?”

“The answer Lightning Thief is pretty basic but it’s my favorite or maybe the Titan’s Curse, I’m not sure,” 

“Okay cool, thank you,” I turned back to face Harry “See,” 

“That doesn’t prove anything but okay,”

“He knew more than one book in the Percy Jackson series that tells me all I need to know,” 

“I know more than one Percy Jackson book,” He eyed me.

“Yeah and you’re gay,”

He just huffed. Got him there. 

“He still wouldn’t fuck you though,” I sat tucked my legs underneath me.

“Whatever shouldn’t you be in your class? Which is it again?”

“Physics,” 

“Oh…”

“Oh what? Don’t oh me,” 

“You’re avoiding Peter,” 

“I’m not avoiding Peter,” I totally was. Just Harry thinks I’m doing it because I like him. I didn’t tell him that but I might've let him believe it, because how do you even go about telling someone Hey I’m avoiding the person because fire came out of my body and they saw it.  I’d sound insane. 

As I was walking to the gym and by to, I mean away from, but that’s not the point, I could’ve sworn I saw the same man from Saturday in the window near the crowd of students. 

Accompanied by the same gut feeling. 

I pushed my way into the gym. To avoid him. I bumped into someone. Off instinct I got defensive but then I heard an 

“Oh, sorry. Sorry!” Once they’d turned around I realized it had been Peter. Just my luck. 

“You’re fine that was basically my fault anyway,” 

I was going to just walk over to one of my friends but they weren’t here and Liz literally just left the school. So I had no escape. 

Well there was one escape. There’s always a way out.

“Y/N!” The female gym coach called. 

“Yes?” I rolled my eyes.

“Where are your gym clothes?” 

“Probably in the locker room...” 

“Why aren’t you wearing them?”

“I didn’t feel like it,”

“You need to change for your grade, participation is important,” 

I picked up my backpack off the floor before pushing open the doors to the girls locker room. Instead of going towards my locker I headed straight for the metal doors leading into the hallway. I went to the space I always seemed to drift to when I had nowhere else to go. 

The teachers bathroom. 

I know that sounds weird but it’s the only one I can lock. I stole a key a while back when I went to get my phone back from one of the teachers. 

I guess Carmen was a psychic or something because one of the videos she’d posted on our group account of us eating in the dresses, me getting that tattoo, and dying Carmen’s hair had blown up. 

I did not see her take any of the clips but the proof was right in front of me. 

The video had half a million views and I assumed that was because of all the comments helping pushing the algorithm.

Some of them were nice like

hey lol 

you’re both gorgeous omg 

That tattoo is cool af 

I want to be you 

I should pay you to do my hair lmao

I can't tell if i want to be you

The other half were like 

No child should be getting a tattoo you look so young

That is the devils sign I’m praying for you. 

Why please Go To God✝️✝️🙏🏻🙏🏻♥️

Im praying for you 

At first I was confused as to why half of the comments were people praying. Then I realized it was because Carmen had on her pentagram necklace. 

I’m definitely not complaining about the comments though because they got me that many views, likes, and follows, but the ignorance upsets me. A pentagram only represents Earth, Air, Water, and Fire it’s about balance. 

 I think it’s cool, kinda like the Avatar. It has nothing to do with Satan. I didn’t really want to think about Fire. I was still freaking out about Friday. It hadn’t happened again so maybe I dreamt it or something. 

Somehow I spent the rest of gym and half of what should’ve been me heading to detention responding to every Christian’s comment with something dumb or witty. 

I was walking towards the detention room and was startled by Peter. Again.

“Hey Y/N?”

“Yes?” 

“Um… this is gonna sound insane but,” he paused looking down fiddling with his hands. 

My face twisted up in confusion as to why he still hadn’t spoken. 

“Are you gonna to speak…”

“Oh. Oh!” He looked back up “Yeah you remember my internship right?”

“Yeah…” I guess he was going to act like I didn’t know about him being Spiderman again.

“So now Mr. Stark is interested in you and wants you to come with me upstate,”

“Why me?” 

“I’m not sure, but if you’re coming someone is outside waiting for us,” 

I’m sure this was just another attempt to lure me into some SHIELD mess. However Peter had no idea about Thorn or any of the other fucked up shit I’d done. So it would look suspicious if I didn’t go. Because what kid or any other person wouldn’t want to meet Tony Stark. 

“Okay then, what are we waiting for?” 

The ride there was completely silent. I spent the whole time texting Carmen as she complained about her boyfriend. I really hated him oh my God. Peter had gone into the building about 15 minutes ago. 

“Okay, if he’s always getting on your nerves and trying to control you why are you still with him?” I asked in the snap meant for Carmen. 

“You know why, I’m not going to say it because then you’d get mad at me,” She sent a video back.

“Thank you I do not want to hear about your boyfriends dick-,” I was interrupted by a knock on the window “Okay I can’t talk got to go,” I sent the video before sliding across the seat pushing the door open. 

“What happened?” I asked as Peter sat back in the car. 

“It was a test,” He said, providing no further elaboration. 

The back window was rolled down and the guy who drove us here. Happy, I think. There is no way that was his real name. He stuck his face in the window. 

“Hey, the boss wants to see you now,” 

I turned back to Peter and whispered.

“The boss? Am I about to walk into some mafia meeting,” 

He just laughed at that. 

“We don’t have much time,” Happy urged. 

As we began walking the halls of the giant building as I pocketed random trinkets that I could sell for a quick buck. 

“So what’s your real name?” I asked Happy since this whole time he was leading me it was a silent ride. 

He continued to ignore me.

So I asked again. I could tell from his body language that I was getting on his nerves. 

I asked twice more and by the time the last sentence came out of my mouth we’d already reached our destination. He walked away not before mumbling a quick I hate kids. 

“Y/N it’s nice to meet you,” Tony greeted as he reached out to shake my hand. I allowed it.

“You’re a lot shorter in person,” I pointed out after releasing his hand. 

“Not the first time I’ve heard that,” He reached for a bowl putting something in his mouth. “Grape?” He offered.

“No thank you,” Not like they’d be poisoned  or anything, no one had even gotten the chance to question me yet. Also there was the fact that he was eating them but this could be a Princess Bride situation. Not taking any chances. 

“Okay,” He clapped, dusting his hands. “Let’s get to the point now,” 

“So I’ve been informed that you had an instance with pyrokinesis,” He continued after I nodded. “I was hoping to research this to get to the bottom of this,”

“So you want to use me as a lab rat?”

“No of course not, the research would be used purely for your personal benefit,” 

For my benefit my ass. They were going to turn me into a lab rat or a soldier.

“Okay I’ll think about it,” Thought about it. A hard hell no.

“If you do choose to do so since you are a minor I’ll need parental consent,” 

“Of course,” I nodded.

There was a pamphlet that I wasn’t going to read. I wasn’t really going to ask for permission. Was I? If I wasn’t then why was I back at ”my” house. 

I just missed my bed, it was messy but it was mine. 

I started sobbing for no reason at all. Maybe it was the old sketchbooks on my bed, or my mom's broken jewelry box. It could’ve been the smell of incense that never left from the lack of ventilation. It was probably the pile of crystals on my dresser. Then again it could’ve been the nazar eye amulet from the broken bracelet on the ground or the hole in the wall where I used to keep my favorite knife. Maybe it was all of those things. Maybe it was so much more. Maybe it was something different entirely. Maybe it was the colors of the wind. Who knows. 

My eyes stung as my eyeliner dripped down and into them. I blinked the tears away as I went through all my clothes and I mean ALL my clothes. 

I found another bodycon dress. I slipped it on after stuffing a few other articles in my bag. I continued searching to the very back of my closet and I found an old purse. There were at least $50 in the back pocket and in the front pocket there were- Oh. 

There was a small plastic bag with at least 500gs of Xanax. I must’ve left them there after Washington.

 I wasn’t going to take them. I really wasn't; I just put them in the bra. You know for safe keeping. I heard the front door open and made a break for the balcony. 

Although I’d regularly seen my sisters. I still hadn’t seen my dad since I’d left. They’d seen him a couple times though he was fine with the idea of them staying at our grandma’s for who knows how long. He doesn’t care as long as he’s still got that girlfriend of his. I can only imagine what he told her about us not staying with him.

 I jumped down the stairs of the fire escape and my heart almost jumped out of my chest. As something hit my calf. 

I looked down to see it was just Salem climbing up my leg. I lifted her up to my chest nuzzling the top of her head. 

“Hiii baby!” I cooed in a baby voice. 

I now more carefully made my way down the steps so as to not disrupt her. Now I was going to go straight to my grandma’s house to drop off the clothes, but I wanted to go shopping before it got too late.

 I already had no money so I have no idea why I thought it was a good idea but there I was with a $300 charge on my credit card. 

I probably looked insane walking around the mall with a cat in my backpack and black streaks underneath my eyes. 

If you’ve never done this I highly recommend it. Every subway train comes with carts and the last cart is a door with railing and no other restrictions. You can just sneak into the very back. 

The wind hitting your face is the most freeing thing in the world and you can scream as loud as you want and no one will hear you. That fact can be unsettling to some but to me it’s beautiful. 

Releasing your true emotions to no one but you and yourself. I closed my eyes holding onto the railing with one hand and Salem in the other. I put her back into my backpack before sitting down. 

Since the app is addicting, and you can’t tell me it’s not, I opened Tiktok and the first thing I saw is a guy pouring what I hoped wasn’t I thought it was into a bowl. 

So naturally my first reaction was to make a video about it because who doesn’t overshare on the internet. 

“Tell me why,” The track rumbled underneath me, making Salem whine, I picked her up letting her cuddle into my chest. 

“Okay, I have a cat now but-” The track rumbled again “It’s so fucking loud but tell me why I opened this hellfire app and see some dude pouring cum into a bowl, I hate everyone,” 

Within like six minutes of me posting it I had multiple likes and comments. 

The only reason being is that Harry dueted.

 I gotta say being the kid of a mayor and a multimillionaire gives you some form of clout. So he had a pretty heft following.

Harry’s similar to me in the way that we’re mean to our friends. So naturally  we’re ”mean” to each other. 

“You look stupid,” Harry claimed in his video “Also who’s fucking cat did you steal put it back and get in the trains properly and go wash your face,”

I hadn’t even realized I was on my new account at first. 

Of course I made a response video. 

“First of all this is my cat, her name is Salem and she’s adorable” I mean not really but she belongs to no one else, and I feed her. “Second, ignore my eyeliner. I actually think it looks kinda cute,” Lie, It just made me look crazy. “Also how'd you even find this account so fast? Stalker. I’d advise you shut up before I post your phone number then you’d have to ward off groupies. I’m sure you’d like that though.” 

I’m pretty sure the majority of the people in our comments thought we were being serious. So in turn they commented things like I have no idea who you are but I’m on your side, is this gonna be another scandal, or here before the news is talking about it. 

I’m not complaining. His history of scandals got me to 5k followers for the pure assumption that I was involved in some other secret. 

My mind was moving at 100 miles per hour. It felt like I was on a whole bottle of adderall.  I was going somewhere. At least I remember I was supposed to be somewhere. I’m pretty sure my grandma’s house was where I was going. Right?

“No weapon against you shall prosper mija,” My grandma squeezed my hand “You are stronger than you know,”

“I know. Thank you,” 

I’d got here and we had a 30 minute conversation about my mental health without outright saying anything about mental health. It was just mostly her taking shots at my dad. With the exception of her telling me I was dressed like una furcia. 

“Okay well,” I pushed up off the couch “I just came to bring some clothes and I need to get back anyway,” 

“Get back to where, where are staying?” She asked. 

“Oh you remember MJ right?” I lied. 

“Oh yes, I like that lil’ girl,” 

I went into the guest room to where my sisters were staying. I could hear rustling as I got closer to the room. I flicked on the lights. To see both of my sisters asleep. It was only 10:30 so that was highly unlikely.

“I know you’re not sleep it’s just me,” 

They peeled open their eyes, sitting up. 

“I come bearing gifts,” I announced kneeling down next to the bag. 

I placed the bag on the floor carefully so I wouldn’t hurt Salem.

Sapphire squealed when she saw her. 

“You got Salem? I missed her!” 

“Well actually, I just brought clothes,” I dumped them on the bed “Aaliyah come here?” I asked. 

She hopped down from the bed. 

“All of Sapphire’s clothes are over there but I know we’re like the same size so pick what you want,” I told her. 

She took at least half of what I had but I wasn’t complaining because at least she wasn’t going behind my back and taking them. 

“Okay but like am I really allowed to hate my father like cause,” I tried to move only to immediately lose balance “Shit- but like can I even hate my dad if I do the same shit he does, like maybe, maybe it’s like some contractual blood magic shit and I’m just destined to be a shitty person,” I was sending videos to some group chat I didn’t know who was in it because I couldn’t really read the name I just know Harry was the only one responding. 

“I get it being like your parents is scary but you’re not and I won’t let you be like that, now get some sleep please,” Harry reassured. 

“NO! It’s like,” I struggled to get the sentence out “It’s like crazy because before I existed it like someone fucking planted this, like it- it’s a-,” I hit my forehead on each word as if I could physically knock them out. “It’s a seed in my brain and it’s only going to grow as I get older and I’m just gonna be an asshole, it’s fucking happening already and I-“ Carmen came into the living room I flipped the camera onto her “Say hi!” I slurred. 

“Y/N you okay?” She said making her way over to me. I stopped the video and sent it. 

“I’m fine how are you?” 

“I thought you went to bed,” she ignored my question. 

“I did. Then I couldn’t sleep,” I leaned back onto the couch. She crouched down next to me feeling my forehead.

“You have a fever,” She claimed.

“No I don’t! Why does everyone keep saying that?” I whined. 

“Are you high?” She moved closer to my face. 

“No I’m not fucking high,” 

“You’re slurring your words,” She pointed out moving into the kitchen “What’d you take?” 

“What?”

“I said what’d you take,” She going into one of the cabinets “I know you’re not drunk because you don’t smell like alcohol and you don't smell like weed, so I’ll ask you again,” 

“I didn’t take anything, I'm not high!” I explained. 

“It was Benadryl wasn’t it?” She came back into the living room and handed me a glass of water. “You know that stuff kills people,” 

“Yeah I think I of all people would know that,” Truth is I wasn’t lying. I didn’t take anything. I don’t know what’s wrong with me, maybe sleep deprivation.

“True,” She sat down on the floor next to me “You know how I said I can tell when it’s getting bad,” I nodded. “Well like I was saying before it’s getting bad for you-”

“No it’s not,” I interrupted “I’m literally the happiest I’ve ever been today,” 

“I was getting there,” She held her hands up in an attempt to placate me “That’s just the calm before the storm it’s mania,”

“I’m not manic! Stop trying to psychoanalyze me I’m perfectly fine,” 

I must've woken Salem up because I could hear her footsteps as she paddled over to me and sat in my lap. It’s like she knew when I was getting angry. 

“That’s the thing you’re not fine, just let me know when you’re ready to admit that,” She pushed off the ground using her hands “Try to get some sleep please and thank you,” 

I think it was the weight and warmth of Salem on my chest that finally lulled me to sleep like a weighted blanket. 

“Sapphire!” I yelled to catch her attention “Stop running you’re gonna hurt yourself,” 

She slowed down before making her way back to Aaliyah and the other kids at this birthday party. 

I sat back down on the table’s bench before getting back on my phone. I saw this post one time about how people use technology to distract themselves so they can't have the chance to have a depressive thought. Then I decided to prove that theory wrong so I put my phone up and I thought. 

And boy did I have a lot to think about. The biggest thing on my mind was why. Why did Tony Stark come after me? Why did the guy with the gun come after me? Why did my mom feel the need to make an “Incase I die” video? Why did she have connections to people like Kingpin? Why did she even know Wade? Wasn’t he some science experiment gone wrong? 

Then that got me thinking what if I was a science experiment gone. What if that’s why Tony Stark wanted to experiment on me. What if that was under the orders of someone from SHIELD, because how would he have known about me otherwise. 

Welp, there was only one way to find out. 

“Okay I’m in,” I settled. “What do I have to do?”

“Uh are you sure?” Tony asked.

“Positive,” I affirmed. 

“Well first we would probably do some blood tests and an MRI. Then see where that takes us.” He looked back over at me “Can you do this tomorrow?” 

“Yeah tomorrow works for me,” 

“Great,” He clapped his hands together “I’ll send Happy to pick you up from school,” 

“No it’s fine I can get here myself.” 

“It’s a different location,” He revealed. 

“Okay tell me where it is and I’ll make it there myself,”

“I can’t not even I know where it is,” 

“Fine, I’ll do this, but only if I can bring a friend,” I requested “You know for safety reasons?”

“Safety reasons? Do you not trust me?”

“Not really…” 

“Wow okay, you can bring this friend,” 

“Who doesn’t trust Iron man?'' I heard him mutter to himself as I made my way out of the building. 

I always thought the apocalypse would come in colors. The sky flashing from red to pink to purple to orange. Then there would be a loud sound almost like the Big Bang. Then nothing. I had a vivid imagination when I was younger. 

I guess I was wrong though because it was already here and the sky was as blue as ever.  And the air was as humid as ever in this crusty ass building. 

“I told you already I’m not a soldier you’re gonna have to pay me for this,” I spoke into the comms.

“Shh,” Tony hushed “Just wait for your target.”

Life hadn’t been all that bad. Just for the past two weeks I’d been training with Peter since at the end of the week that I agreed to testing, Spiderman joined in the Avengers officially. Which, good for him I guess. 

Trying to get my brain back on track now. I’d been training with Peter and now we’re going on our first mission. I was not loyal to Tony at all. Nor would I ever be. I’m not calling him Mr. Stark like Peter does either, he doesn’t deserve it. I was trying to look up my mom with the information Felicia gave me and I saw she was listed as level orange in a shield file. Whatever that means.

One thing it meant was I couldn’t back out just yet now.

This would be one deep inside job.

“Peter?” I whispered into the comms

“Hello?” He asked.

“Where are you?” 

“I’m guarding the entrance like I was told too?” He asked more than stated. 

“Well, come here,” 

“But Mr. Stark said-“ 

“I don’t care what Mr. Stark said come here,” I interjected without even thinking about the fact he could’ve been listening in somehow. 

“Yes?” He questioned once he was standing in front of me.

“Take my role for a second,” I pulled my gun out the holster “You know how to use a gun right?”

I thought back to the last time we’d actually fought as our alter egos. Except then he didn’t know it was me and he still doesn’t. He definitely didn’t know how to use a gun then let’s just hope he did now. 

“You know what, I don’t have time just take it,” I placed the gun in his palm before speeding off.

“Wait!” He called out “Aren’t you defenseless now?” 

“I’ll be fine baby boy,” I called back.

I made my way into the farthest depths of the warehouse. I’d been here once before. That was before I knew Felicia and we’d gotten into a scuffle about a diamond. Let’s just say I was young and I went home bruised that day. 

Apparently I was under the impression she had it and she was under the impression I had it this whole time. So maybe. Just maybe it was still there. It was somewhere in the back last time I checked.

 There it was. I grabbed it and recoiled when I heard a voice accompanied by the sharp zap in my body. 

“Looking for something?” They asked. I turned around only to be faced with a large burly almost Frankenstein looking man. 

“Oh yeah I was looking for you actually, you just made my job a lot easier,” 

As if my words were a signal for him. They probably were. He lunged forward towards me with his left side fully open. I evaded and left a sharp kick to his side. 

He wailed out in pain before slinging me backward as I tried to reach for the diamond off the floor. 

I skidded across the floor before hopping back to my feet. 

“I found the guy,” I spoke into the comms.

“Who are you talking to?” The target teased. 

“Your mom,” I taunted. 

“Hey!” He cried. 

“Where are you?” I heard Peter ask I didn’t get a chance to answer because the man swung at me again. 

That hit made contact with my shoulder. He continued to swing and I continued to walk backwards. I realized almost too late that I was backing myself into a corner.

I’m not sure where or who I heard this from maybe Wade but sometimes the only point your opponent has his guard down is mid punch.

 I scrambled for my knife, fingers dancing around the holster on my waist as my feet continued to slide along the pavement underneath me. Just as the man swung at me again I sent my knife towards his torso. Except it didn’t make contact. And I had never missed before, especially not from this close. 

I was confused until I realized it was because I heard that all familiar wet sticky sound of Spider-Man’s web shooters except this time I was glad to hear it. 

Peter webbed the man's arms and mouth all while my fingers went lax in shock for only a moment but one moment too long. 

The knife clattered to the ground making a noise that drew Peter’s attention. I tried to swipe it away with my foot but Peter had already grabbed it. 

“This is Thorns knife,” He spoke calmly and I wasn’t sure if it was directed at me or if it was for himself.

“And how would you have Thorns knife unless you were,” I saw his eyes light up as he made the connection. “Wait, you’re Thorn, holy shit, I’m so stupid how’d I not notice before,”

“Peter seriously you can’t tell anyone,” 

He looked up as if he were just noticing I was still there. 

���Don’t worry I won’t be saying anything at all,” 

Yeah, this was definitely the apocalypse because I don’t know if it was just me but life was ending.

Another silent ride and I realized exactly what he’d meant when he said he wouldn’t say anything. He was giving me the silent treatment. 

Which was odd because usually he talks the most on these rides. After we got over the initial awkwardness of the whole fire and Vulture thing we fell back into the way of things. Well if he was going to play this game I would too because what’s that saying? It takes two to tango. 

Taglist: 

@tomdiddlyumptious​

#peter parker #peter parker fanfiction #peter parker x reader #reader x peter parker #Peter Parker x Vigilante!Reader #peter parker x you #peter parker imagine #peter parker x fem!reader #peter parker x poc reader #peter parker x black!reader #peter parker x bi!reader #peter parker x bisexual!reader #peter parker x villian!reader #spiderman x villian #spiderman x thorn #mcu series #mcu x reader #mcu x y/n #peter parker x y/n #Thorn Series #Thorns prick #peter parker x thorn

[thelandofall05]

Geometry in motion: Abstract painting in Nathan Chen's programs

It should be remembered that a picture – before being a war-horse, a nude, or an anecdote of some sort – is essentially a flat surface covered with colours assembled in a certain order,

– Maurice Denis, French symbolist painter.

Abstract art (from Latin “abstractus” – “drawn away”) is a non-figurative, non-objective art, where artists distance themselves from objective referents and use the visual language of colorful splashes, lines, geometric elements in various combinations. Abstract art has many styles: abstract expressionism, suprematism, geometric abstraction, op art, etc. This genre uses colorful shapes instead of realistic images. Wassily Kandinsky, one of the founding fathers of abstract art, believed that one should not analyze paintings objectively, but an effect on the emotions of the observer.

Abstract artists aspired to perceive the world with all its phenomena, forms and colors. One of the main ideas of abstract art is the fusion of painting and music. Kandinsky described Richard Wagner as his inspiration. Dutch painter Piet Mondrian was fond of modern rhymes, jazz and boogie-woogie, and named his canvases after music pieces.

Figure skating is an amalgamation of music, image, choreography and technique. The debate on what is essential in the fusion of the athletic and the artistic sides is going to go on forever. Like abstract art, figure skating consists of prescribed elements such as jumps, spins, steps, and turns that strictly comply with the rules and, at the same time, appeal to the emotions of the audience. Skaters develop their own style and become true artists and creators.

For example, the American skater Nathan Chen is famous for his minimalist costumes and for building his programs around abstract images rather than a specific character. Nathan chooses music with short but memorable titles (Nemesis, Caravan, La Boheme, Rocketman), tries himself in various genres (soul, jazz, chanson, flamenco) and expresses a wide range of emotions in his programs.

Like many abstract artists with a solid background in traditional art and impeccable technique, in years as a junior Nathan performed classical programs. He also tried his hand at iconic references, like Michael Jackson and did so brilliantly. However, can we call him an abstract artist now? Well, why not. For him the ice becomes a canvas, technical elements turn into a palette of colors, and the athlete’s body transforms into a tool that creates the masterpiece.

photo cred. Toshifumi Kitamura / Getty Images

Suprematism is an art movement that uses geometric abstraction in combinations of basic figures like circles, squares, lines, and rectangles painted in various colors. Suprematists reject all references to the figurative world and “earthly” meanings. Their paintings lack directions of up and down, left and right. Like in outer space, all directions are equal. The experience of color and shape is processed through the lens of the observer’s internal world. Malevich's "Black Square" is the symbol of Russian avant-garde and one of the most famous paintings in the world of art.

Just like the “Black Square" was Malevich's calling card, Nathan's short program “Nemesis” (music by Benjamin Clementine, choreography by Shae-Lynn Bourne) is the most recognizable in the skater’s career. Like a magnet, it captures attention of the audience at the rink as well as the ones watching the livestream. The simple costume, the sharp movements, the performance full of rebellion – all had the energy of a diamond in the rough of the rarest black color. Here Nathan is not a lyrical hero. Instead, like a suprematist, he portrays a strong emotion and ignites intense feelings to the powerful vocals of Benjamin Clementine. Nathan named “Nemesis�� his favorite program where he could be himself. The skater flies over the ice with the resolve of an inescapable fate, reminding us that Nemesis was the goddess of revenge and the mother of karma (Nemesis is, Nemesis is, Nemesis is the mother of Karma). And like the “Black Square”, one can love or hate this program, but it is impossible to forget.

photo cred. Icon Sportswire / Getty Images

One of the ideas of abstract expressionism was to abandon structured composition and to produce large-scale, non-objective imagery. This movement developed in the United States and was considered purely American in spirit, being monumental, romantic and highlighting the serious questions of individual freedom. Barnett Newman believed that an artist is a choreographer of space. He infused his paintings with harsh flat color, thus predating the minimalist artists. A distinctive feature of his works – the so-called “zipper" – defined the structure of the paintings.

The music from the movie “Desierto” accompanies Nathan’s long program “Land of All” (music by Woodkid, choreography by Marie-France Dubreuil and Samuel Chouinard). The movie tells us about the fates of immigrants in the United States. Chen said he was not aiming to cover this topic and fill his performance with political meaning. Instead the program highlights the subject of individual freedom with the key message clearly stated in the lyrics (I came to break the wall that rose around you to see the land of all). The dark, gloomy atmosphere of the program foreshadows the danger and suggests seeking a way out. Newman said that we are making cathedrals “out of ourselves, out of our own feelings”. In his long program beginning with the lyrics "I took a chance to build a world of mine", Nathan showed that the solution lies in the individual freedom, in the freedom to choose and to express oneself.

photo cred. Raj Mehta / USA TODAY Sports

The term “hard-edge painting” was coined by the writer, curator and the Los Angeles Times art critic Jules Langsner. While studying the works of several painters, he found something  they had in common, namely a particular sharpness of edge and a clarity of color. This style of painting developed among Californian painters as their reaction to the more painterly or gestural forms of abstract expressionism. At that time Langsner worked on an exhibition, featuring works of Karl Benjamin. This exhibition was called the “California Hard edge”. 

The short program “Caravan” (music by Duke Ellington performed by Fanfare Ciocărlia, choreography by Shae-Lynn Bourne) is another iconic program of Nathan’s. The idea of the program belonged to the choreographer. Nathan described this program as a fun opportunity to dance to the music that people would actually want to dance to. Interestingly, Nathan chose the long program music in contrast to the short one. A simple costume and his naughty curls, high technical difficulty and the evocative footwork full of playful choreography, Western jazz flavored with notes of the East – all these make “Caravan” the cheerful and sunny performance that you would enjoy watching over and over again. 

photo cred. Margarita (zhem_chug) Voronkovskaya

Action painting is a genre in which the paint is spontaneously splashed or dribbled onto the canvas. The finished painting becomes a physical manifestation of art. It seems that an artist acts unconsciously, bringing their pure emotions to the canvas. They create a painting publicly, making a kind of performance from their actions and splashes of paint. Jackson Pollock, being one of the best known representatives of the movement, considered his style of work spontaneous and emotional. He defined it as "a natural growth out of a need", when spontaneous painting was directed by the subconscious instruments of creativity.

Nathan’s long program “Rocketman” (soundtrack to the movie “Rocketman”, choreography by Marie-France Dubreuil and Samuel Chouinard) can be regarded as an anthem to movement and athleticism. Complicated jumps matching music accents required lots of strength and concentration from the athlete, at the same time preparing the audience for the blast of emotions in the final choreographic sequence. His loose hip-hop movements had an organic quality of a dance floor improvisation. His passionate performance brought the house down again and again. In the act of creation the skater turned the ice into the canvas, splashing steps and turns like paint. And only when the music ended could the athlete and the audience breathe out. The program can be divided into two emotionally different parts. At first the skater presents the audience with a series of gorgeous quad jumps that set the rhythm of the performance like a metronome. And then he launches the explosive choreography of his final choreo sequence in the end.

photo cred. Jay Adeff / U.S. Figure Skating

The term “neoplasticism” was coined by an artist named Piet Mondrian. The guiding principle of the style was the dynamic equality of the horizontal and vertical lines painted with the primary blue, red, and yellow. Mondrian created his unique works from the basic geometric compositions. He perceived the world as a contrast of the vertical and the horizontal, the positive and the negative, the masculine and the feminine. The asymmetry of figures that we see in his paintings symbolizes unity and synergy of the Universe. The works of Mondrian influenced many contemporary artists. Many styles of modern art like minimalism and pop art hail back to Mondrian and the "De Stijl" group. 

In Nathan's long program of the 2020/2021 season (Selections from Philipp Glass, choreography by Shae-Lynn Bourne) the first thing that immediately catches one’s attention is the bright royal blue color of the shirt and absence of decoration except one vertical line of the same royal blue but of a different fabric. Mondrian considered the vertical line to be a symbol of masculinity. According to him it began at the center of the Sun. This is a totally abstract program without a specific name or character. The spectators get neither hints nor limits and decide themselves whether they are watching a lyrical tale, or an attempt to find oneself, or a portrayal of the power of nature. The energy of an entire ocean is hidden in simple sounds, smooth movements and restrained expressiveness. And at any moment the ocean can turn violent and merciless. No wonder that as the admirer of the Dutch artist, the skater chose the music of the minimalist composer for his long program. Like Piet Mondrian, Nathan Chen creates his own minimalist aesthetic of movement.

***

Studying the history of abstract art we can conclude that there were several reasons for this style to develop. The hope for changes in the pre-revolutionary society was one of them. At the beginning of the 20th century lots of people were tired of the dominant traditions in the way of life in general and in the arts in particular. They desired something new. The abstract art, which some would consider a kind of art extremism, gave them what they wanted. Without exaggeration abstract art became a new era in painting. 

The changes that are currently happening in figure skating can be undoubtedly called a technical revolution. No one is surprised by quadruple jumps and their quantity, or the age and gender of the skaters. It seems very soon everything will be attainable for everyone. Nathan is one of the pioneers of this revolution. In his programs he shows that athletes can be great technicians AND artists on the ice. And like true artists, athletes can now shed past restrictions and express themselves freely, showing all kinds of emotions, thoughts, and feelings in their programs. 

#figure skating #nathan chen #team usa

[out-of-this-town]

The trouble of owning a dragon

Fairy Tail, Nalu, friendship, romance & fluff

Lucy ends up becoming the owner of a small, troublesome dragon. However, owning a dragon is not a simple matter -especially when the dragon turns out to be not a dragon.

Chapter 2 (ao3) (ff)

Lucy would have stuffed the dragon into her bag if she didn’t think he would dig his way through it. But now that she was standing at the train station, she wondered if sacrificing her favorite bag would have been worth it. Natsu seemed beyond agitated and ready to take off at any second. 

He was sitting on her shoulder, tail wrapped tightly around her neck and claws digging hard into her shoulder. She had tried easing his grip on her a few times, but it only worked for a minute or so before he was back to clamping onto her. Lucy could tell he was nervous about something, she just didn’t know what. She had expected this to go like it had yesterday, with him hissing at every human that looked their way. But no, it wasn’t like that at all.

Natsu’s odd stillness and neediness to hang onto her had started that morning, when Lucy had tried telling him how to behave on the train. He’d started making distressed sounds and clawing at her luggage. She knew he was trying to tell her something, but the problem was, she didn’t speak dragon. 

And now he was just sitting in his place, not making a sound, staring at the train tracks with unblinking eyes. He hadn’t so much as looked at the man that had bumped into her on the way here!

Lucy was getting more worried the longer this went on. He hadn’t even finished his breakfast! Had she broken him somehow? What was she supposed to do with an ill dragon? She didn’t think that any vet in Magnolia was qualified to treat dragons. Ugh, this whole dragon business was a nightmare!

Petting the side of his head with her hand, she tried calming him as much as herself with the repetitive movement. Even though Natsu hadn’t hurt her in the small amount of time she’d had him, she was still a little distrustful of the dragon, half expecting to be bitten for touching him. He didn’t bite her though, he barely acknowledged her at first. She stroked her finger against his scaled cheek a few times before he lightly leaned himself against her hand. His gaze didn’t stray from the train tracks though.

“Natsu,” she cooed softly, trying to distract him from whatever it was that was causing him worry. Reluctantly, the dragon tilted his head to look at her. “What’s wrong?”

She wasn’t sure why she kept talking to him as if he could actually answer, but somehow it felt right. There was an odd spark in his eyes when she talked to him, something that told her he wasn’t just about his instincts; he was far smarter than that. Like he was capable processing and understanding in a way that wasn’t normal for an animal of any kind.

Natsu looked at her a with serious eyes before his head snapped towards the sound of the approaching train. He inched closer to her head and leaned against it.

Was she imagining it or was the dragon trembling slightly? 

The sound of the train whistle had Natsu standing on his hind legs and screeching in distress while his wings flapped in alarmed manner. Well, one of them was flapping, the other just rammed against her cheek repeatedly. 

Was he afraid of the train? How was that possible? Dragons didn’t travel with trains... Unless he’d been transported with it earlier and the experience had traumatized the poor creature. 

Lucy cursed herself for not asking more questions from the shopkeeper. Was he the one to traumatize Natsu, or was the wizard who sold him responsible?

“Hey, Natsu, it’s going to be okay. Trains aren’t that bad. Whatever has you so spooked about them is not going to be a problem, I promise.”  Lucy tried to soothe him, though her words seemed to fall on deaf ears.

She wanted to hug him close, partly to try and calm him and partly to make sure he didn’t take off on his own. Nervous dragon loose on the crowded train platform was just asking for trouble. She couldn’t act on her wish to hold him though, since she had to keep a hold of her luggage. The best she could do at the moment was try and grab his tail again if he decided to make a run (fly?) for it.

Of course she could summon one of her spirits to lend a hand, but Lucy was a little worried about how Natsu would react to something like that, and this definitely wasn’t the place to find out. Once they were back in Magnolia however, the celestial mage planned on familiarizing Natsu with all her spirits. She had a feeling they would be needed to help her manage the dragon.

As the train rumbled to a stop at the station, Lucy kept one hand at the ready to catch him while also murmuring soft words of comfort, though she didn’t think it was helping much.

Lucy waited until most of the crowd had filtered out of the way before making her way into the train. Natsu was tense on her shoulder, his claws biting through her shirt and into her skin. Deciding that reprimanding him would be cruel considering his current state, Lucy tried her best to walk with quick and steady steps to their seats. Beyond glad that she had managed to book both of the seats in order to avoid any incidents, she pushed her luggage next to the wall and sat down. 

Prying Natsu off of her shoulder turned out to be surprisingly difficult. He was sitting rigidly and his claws were tangled in the material of her t-shirt. It took some tugging as well as ruining her shirt, but she had him sitting on her palms just in time for when the train to started moving. 

And just like that, Natsu was laying flat on her hands, the bright red color of his scales dulling before her eyes and turning a concerning shade of light pink. Even his unusually warm body seemed to cool in an instant.

“Natsu?” she whispered, poking him gently with her thumb. All she got was a little grumble. “...Are you motion sick?” She really couldn’t think of another reason for his sudden look of illness.

Tail wound tightly around his small body, Natsu tucked himself into a little ball and nuzzled her palm.

“Oh, you poor little thing.” 

She held him close to her chest with hand while using the other to fish out a few napkins from her handbag. Carefully so not to pounce him around too badly, she tugged the napkins under the sick dragon -just in case. “Would you like some water or food? I think eating something salty might help.”

If the sound he made was any indication, he didn’t. 

Lucy stroked softly along his back, murmuring what she hoped were comforting words and trying her best not to jostle him. The next few hours would be long for the tiny creature and she felt awful for unknowingly putting him through this. What a horrible way for him to spend the second day with his new carer.

Hopefully he won’t hate me after this, she thought grimly.

When the ticker inspector stopped to chat with her, Lucy felt terrible for being relieved of the dragon’s current condition. But honestly, letting your dragon tear into a train employee was a sure way to get kicked off the train... Though Natsu would probably be happy about that.

Hours later, when they finally arrived to Magnolia, Lucy nudged Natsu to crawl around her neck, where he hung limp. While cursing at the way her hands were cramping after petting him for so long, she gathered her bags and rushed out of the train as fast as she could. 

She really hoped that some fresh air would be all that the dragon needed to feel better. And luckily, it really didn’t take long for Natsu to start lifting his head in order to look around. Lucy suspected that the heavenly scent from the bakery was a great motivator for his improved health.

“Don’t even think about it,” Lucy warned when she saw him eyeing a burger stand. “Food is going to have to wait until we get home.” She wasn’t going to temp faith after surviving the train ride without any incidents.

Natsu growled in displeasure and gazed longingly to where the food was located. But thankfully, he remained on her shoulder even he wasn’t happy to do so. Lucy reached up to scratch under his chin, hoping to placate him. “I’m glad that you are feeling better.”

He looked at her, still offended for having been denied food but he seemed to cheer up when she promised he would get to eat soon . He clicked happily at her before nuzzling her cheek. Stars, he was adorable.

As soon as she pushed open her apartment door, Natsu shot off her shoulder to explore. Lucy was slower to follow him to the living room, dropping her bags to the floor, she watched as Natsu flew around the room before landing on her dresser. He sniffed and poked at the nick-knacks there, and Lucy could only hope that he didn’t try to eat anything there.

She took the time to empty her luggage while Natsu got busy crawling around every available surface. He was very interested in the bed, rolling on the blankets and digging himself under the covers. The next time she looked up, she found him nosing through her desk and the papers there. She didn’t waste time jumping up to shoo him away. “No! Don’t touch those, I’ve-”

But Natsu wasn’t listening to her since he was already speeding towards the kitchen. Lucy grumbled under her breath and followed after him to make sure he didn’t destroy anything.

They were both disgruntled to find that Lucy did not, in fact, have anything to eat in her kitchen. As it turned out, she had forgotten that she had planned to do the shopping once she’d been paid for her latest job.

Lucy slammed her head against the fridge in frustration. Her two options were to go shopping with hungry and less-than-happy Natsu (because leaving him alone in her apartment seemed like a bad idea) or head to the guild and eat there.

It wasn’t difficult to decide that the guild would be the better option. None of her friends would sue her for the damage Natsu did, and her guildmates would have to meet the dragon sooner or later -might as well get that out of the way. And she did need to go inform Mira that her mission had been a success and she was back, safe and sound. So the Guildhall it was.

“All right then.” She plucked Natsu off the kitchen table where he was sulking and held him in front of her. “We are going to head for the guild where we can eat. BUT! No biting or clawing at anyone unless I tell you to, got it?”

He only wagged his tail in excitement over the promise of food.

Lucy let him clime to his usual spot around her neck before snatching up her bag and marching out the door. She had hoped to feed Natsu at home and then try to introduce him to some of her spirits -she still needed to see if Aries wanted to make a contract- before venturing into the crowds with him, but this couldn’t be helped. Though she would have felt far more comfortable knowing that she could safely call for her spirits to help if Natsu went on a rampage.

Luckily the streets were calm and Natsu was more focused on the prospect of food than he was on the passersby. Lucy tried to distract him further by telling him about her family at the guild. She was pleased to find that he seemed to be interested in what she had to say. He became very excited when Mira’s cooking skills were mentioned and grumpy when Gray’s stripping habit came up. All in all, she was curious to see how Natsu would settle in.

The dragon on her shoulder tensed when she walked through the massive double doors of the guildhall. There weren’t that many people around, but Natsu shifted nervously as Lucy replied to the few hellos that were yelled in her direction.

“It’s all right. They are all friends,” she cooed at him while trying to pry the claws off of her shoulder. She took a seat at the bar, grateful that the others were sitting around the tables and no one was nearby to harass Natsu just yet. That is, until Mirajane popped up from behind the bar, startling the poor dragon badly enough that he nearly fell from his spot.

“Lucy! You’re back! And you brought a friend.” Mira’s eyes zeroed in on Natsu, and she giggled when he hissed at the barmaid. “Can’t say that we’ve had dragons inside the guild before.”

“No, Natsu,” Lucy reprimanded him sternly when he made a swipe towards the other woman. “This is Mirajane. The one I told you about, remember? The one who won’t feed us if you bite her.”

Natsu looked between Lucy and Mira a few times, before he dared to move himself on top of the bar. He approached the new person carefully, keeping his eyes nailed to her like he was expecting an attack. Mira lowered her hand slowly for him to sniff. After a long minute that had Lucy biting her lip nervously, Natsu sat back and gave what looked like a nod. The two women took that to mean that he was accepting Mira as not a thread.

“Oh my, aren’t you adorable.” Lucy could tell from her tone that the she-devil was finding it difficult not to cuddle the scaled creature. “How on Earth Land did you get yourself a dragon?”

“Ugh, not on purpose.” Lucy shook her head, still finding it hard to believe that she had an actual dragon. “It involved a sleazy, blackmailing shopkeeper -whose shop you should never visit, by the way- and my desperation to get Aries’ key.”

“Oh, you finally found the key! Loki must be pleased. And I’m sure Aries is happy to have a home with you too.” Mira clapped her hands together in a joyful manner and smiled widely. She knew just how long Lucy had been looking for that one key.

Lucy shrugged and glanced at Natsu, who was following the conversation with narrowed eyes. “I haven’t had the opportunity to talk to either of them yet, but I’m planning on it once we’ve had something to eat.” She smiled hopefully.

“Say no more. I assume you want your usual? And...uh...what do dragons eat?”

Lucy decided on a large steak for Natsu, though she had to assure Mira that the dragon could definitely handle the big meal despite his size. And he seemed eager to prove her right with the way he inhaled the meat as soon as it was placed in front of him. Lucy ate her burger and fries with more manners while chatting with Mira about the details of her last mission. 

“Has Happy returned yet?” Lucy asked after finishing her milkshake. Natsu had seemed to fall into a food coma next to his plate.

Mira shook her head. “Not yet. I got a word from Wendy right after you left for your job; they got sidetracked at the beginning of the mission and are just now getting started with their monster hunt.”

Lucy frowned a little at the information. As annoying as the talking cat could be, she was really missing the little guy. They’d been friends and roommates for the past three years that Lucy had been in the guild, and the cat’s presence in her life was something she had gotten used to. Recently though, Happy had started tacking along on their newest member’s quests -Lucy assumed that it had to do with the female cat that was always glued to Wendy’s side. Not that Lucy could blame the cat for his interest -heavens knew that Lucy would have ditched Happy in a heartbeat for the chance to go on adventures with a hot dude.

And maybe it was better that Happy wasn’t around just yet, since it gave Natsu the time to grow used to his new environment without the added stress factor of having to share his home and Lucy’s attention right away. 

Or he would grow used to it being just the two of them and the addition of Happy would bring a disaster.

“Do you happen to know where Levy is? I could use some help researching dragons.”

“Oh yes. She had a fight with Gajeel this morning and she stormed out. Said she had a headache and wouldn’t be back until tomorrow.” Lucy wondered what Gajeel had done that was bad enough to drive Levy out of the guild library for a full day.

The Celestial mage slumped in her seat a little. She didn’t wan’t to bother Levy with this if she was still pissed over the dragon slayer. Of course she could do the research on her own, but Levy would speed up the process considerably. And Lucy worried that Natsu would grow bored if all her focus was solely on the research, and that he would end up destroying the books. Levy would -understandably- murder them if that happened. 

“When she shows up, could you tell her about Natsu and that I need help researching dragons?”

At Mira’s agreement, Lucy said her goodbyes, scooped up the still passed out dragon and headed for the door. While she usually liked to hang around the guild, it seemed best to give Natsu time to grow used to all this. Sticking to short, food filled visits at first so that he would associate the place with good things (those being food and attention from Lucy), before starting to introduce him to the other members of Fairy Tail.

She was just about to reach the doors when someone slammed themselves right into her back, knocking Natsu out of her arms and onto the floor. He was quick to pounce back to his feet, angry eyes and hisses directed at the person pressed to her back.

So much for nice and calm introductions.

“Lucy! You gotta help me! It’s Erza, she’s gonna ki-” Gray stopped his fear filled rambling as soon as he noticed the growling creature on the floor. “Shit! The fuck is that? Lucy get back!” He yanked her behind himself and got ready to use his maker magic.

Before Lucy had time to tell Gray to back down, or to calm Natsu, the dragon had already launched himself at the ice wizard. She had to scramble to get out the way, when Gray took instinctive steps back to avoid the attack. 

“No!” She watched in horror as Gray swung a bat made of ice, hitting Natsu with a sickening thud and sending the tiny dragon flying across the air. Natsu didn’t seem injured though, he flapped open his wings in order to stop his momentum. 

For a moment he hung in the air, eyes flicking between Lucy and Gray. She took a careful step forward, holding her hands out in a calming manner. “It’s okay, Natsu. Gray didn’t mean to-”.

She didn’t get to the end of the sentence before Gray reached his arm out to stop her from going too close. After that, it was no surprise to Lucy that Natsu dove towards Gray again. He threw up his arms, making an icy shield to hide behind. Natsu managed to stop just before hitting the obstacle while also starting to breath fire towards the shield.

Lucy stared in alarm, uncertain on what she should do. It was doubtful that either of them would listen to her now, and stepping between them seemed like a good way to get hurt. Before she could waste any more time, a new voice broke in.

“Gray! What do you think you’re doing?” Lucy’s eyes snapped towards Erza, who was looming behind them, looking as intimidating as ever -even with strawberry cake smeared across her shirt. Both Gray and Natsu stopped what they were doing, their attention drawn towards Erza. “If you think that just because you’re fighting a dragon, I’m going to forget about you knocking over my cake, you are mistaken.”

Oh, poor Gray.

“N-now, hold on...” The ice-make wizard had gone pale and was now trying to inch his way towards the doors, remnants of the shield melting on the ground and Natsu completely forgotten. “I-I didn’t mean to do that, it was an accident.”

Erza grabbed Gray by the labels before he could make a run for it, and hauled him up. “You didn’t even apologize!” She shook her head in disappointment. “Honestly, I thought you were raised better. But it seems I need to teach you some more manners.” 

Lucy watched with mild worry for her friend, as Erza dragged the petrified Gray away. The guildhall had gone completely silent, all the occupants having been caught up in the entertainment of the past few minute. 

Natsu was still hovering in the air looking baffled, when Lucy snatched him back into her arms. “Well, we’re going now!” she shouted over her shoulder as she rushed outside. Natsu had started to struggle in her arms, intending to go back and finish the fight. 

“No, Natsu. Gray is a friend. What happened was an accident and you two shouldn’t fight.” Lucy tried her best to get him to settle, but the dragon tried to wriggle his way to freedom until they were back in the safety of her apartment where he just sulked and glared at her. He huffed at her words and flew away from her.

“Do not give me that look. I’m not letting you hurt my friends.” Lucy collapsed onto her couch and motioned the dragon to fly closer. “Or them you. Come here, I need to see that you aren’t injured.”

Not that she would know what to do with an injured dragon. Stars, Porlyusica would scowl her all the way to hell, if she brought a dragon in for treatment.

Truly, there had better be some kind of ‘how to’ -guide for taking care of a dragon.

Natsu took his time before deciding to land in her lap in order to let her inspect him. She was very gentle about touching along his sides and pushing carefully against his stomach, worried that the hit Gray had give had caused some serious damage. She was relieved to find that Natsu didn’t seem bothered by her poking, meaning that there was probably no broken ribs or internal bleeding.

“Oh, thank the Stars. We don’t need to risk our lives visiting Porlyusica,” Lucy breathed out and started to run her fingertips lightly over the laid-down spikes along his spine. Natsu seemed to enjoy the petting, judging by the way he was stretching his back into her touch. If he was a cat, Lucy was sure he would be purring.

Eventually, he tipped over to lay on his back like a dog wanting to get it’s belly scratched. Lucy laughed a little before doing just that. Underneath his chin seemed to be the sweet-spot for scratching.

Marveling over how warm he was, she smoothed over the scales, taking note of the fact that the scales were far softer on his stomach than they were on the other parts of his body. 

She also found that he had a single white scale just under his jaw, which stood out against the deep red that otherwise covered him. How odd. 

When she tried to stop the stroking, he wrapped his tail around her wrist to drag her hand back. He was far too adorable and she couldn’t make herself stop the petting just yet.

Soon enough, Natsu was relaxed and snoring, the stress from earlier forgotten. Once she was sure he was sleeping deeply enough, Lucy risked summoning Virgo as quietly as she could.

“Good eve-” Lucy cut off the spirits greeting with a frantic shushing and pointing towards the sleeping dragon. She didn’t even want to think how he would react waking up to stranger in the room.

Though Virgo, the masochist that she was, would probably thank Natsu for the mauling.

“Hi, I’m sorry. I kind of need your help right now, but please try not to wake Natsu.” Lucy looked at the spirit pleadingly.

“Of course, Princess. What would you need me to do?” Virgo whispered back, already looking eager to receive a task.

“Could you go grocery shopping for me, please?” Lucy cringed a little. She felt awful about asking things like this from her spirits, but taking Natsu to the market might be too much after what happened earlier. “I would do it myself, but Natsu has already started one fight today.”

“I would be happy to.” Virgo’s eyes were shining with happiness, which eased Lucy’s guilt a little. “Would you also need assistance with the dragon?”

“No, thank you. Natsu is a new addition to our family -he just needs some time to adjust before meeting you all.” She scratched his chin with a little more pressure, smiling at the way one of his back legs (paws?) kicked in response.

“Alright. Do you want me to inform the other spirits of his presence?”

“If you don’t mind. He might be a little protective of me, but I would like him to meet you all. He’s going to tack along to my missions and it would be good if he had no problems with you guys popping in.” Lucy looked up quickly, remembering what had started all this. “Could you also pass along my apologies to Aries for the delay with summoning her? I have been dying to meet her and talk about maybe making a contract, but I got Natsu at the same time I got her key, so things have been kinda hectic.”

Virgo smiled softly and nodded. “I’ll be sure to tell her. We are all very excited about you finding her key. Loki has already made a list of ways he can show you his gratitude.”

Lucy was still mulling over the threat that was Loki’s gratitude, while Virgo collected Lucy’s wallet and left the apartment.

Natsu was a little like a cat, in the sense that once he decided to fall asleep on her lap, she couldn’t find in in her heart to move him. So instead, she spend a good hour sitting on her couch petting him. Virgo had returned, filled her kitchen and left for the spirit realm long before the dragon finally decided to get up.

The rest of the day was spent cooking for tomorrow (Natsu seemed puzzled by the suddenly full fridge) and cleaning the apartment, with Natsu sticking close by the whole time.

When the sun started to go down, Lucy gave Natsu a rundown of tomorrows plan. He was not happy at the prospect of having to meet Lucy’s spirits. Which meant that Lucy felt the need to give him a good long lecture on how biting your friends was a bad thing that we don’t do, before letting him crawl into bed with her. He, of course, spend a considerable amount of time traveling under the covers and refusing to settle down. Lucy suspected that it was a revenge for the lecture. She was already pretty annoyed by the time he finally decided to curl himself into the crook of her shoulder. 

As if sensing her less-than-good mood, he poked her cheek with his snout a few times, instantly melting her.

“Alright, alright,” laughing a little, she gently nudged his head away from her cheek. “Just go to sleep already.”

After one more nuzzle to her chin, he laid down, his head resting over her neck. Lucy couldn’t help but feel a little happy as she fell asleep.

#fairy tail #Nalu #nalu fanfic #natsu dragneel #lucy heartfilia #My writing #the trouble of owning a dragon