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nocturnalghoul · 7 months

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Echoes

I once again had thoughts about Dew, Mountain, and Aether’s closeness, had to write it, and got lightly angsty (to nobody’s surprise I am sure). A short little piece where Aether attempts to play peacekeeper between the two and ruminates on their differences as well as how people continue on when you aren’t paying attention.

Words: ~1.2k

Rating: General

Below the cut for scrolling purposes

Aether still has no idea what Dew and Mountain had been fighting about for the past few days to have them both so riled up. All he knows is that they both are past a point of simply talking things out themselves, and that the other ghouls are weirdly refusing to get involved.

It can be easy to overlook how fundamentally different the two ghouls are given their closeness, but the events of the last week have been a perfect example. The way that the two ghouls handle upsetting events could not be more different. Dew has always been quick to get riled up, but also to push past everything, like a steam venting to relieve pressure. Mountain on the other hand has a slow temper, but once he is angry it's a much larger and longer lasting event.

Aether can tell that they are at a halfway point between how they handle their emotions. Dew is no longer boiling over with rage at the situation and beginning to cool down, and Mountain’s frustrations are still on an incline but not beyond the point of no return. Seeing them pretend to ignore each other in the kitchen early one morning, long before any other ghouls are likely to awake, seems like as good of a time as any. At least he knows the three of them won’t be interrupted.

“I don’t know why you two are so upset, but I can’t stand to see it anymore. We are going to talk about it, and if I have to pull the ‘everything we’ve been through together’ card I will” Aether states calmly, pulling out two chairs at the large kitchen table before finding his own preferred seat.

“It’s fine Aether” they both grumble in unison, shooting each other an annoyed look afterwards.

“Clearly it’s not. Dew, you have been in your ‘lonely wanderer clothes’ since this began and Mountain, you have that careful sorrow to your voice that only comes out before you go apeshit. Talk.”

One detriment to knowing somebody so well is that they know you as deeply in return. The two ghouls both know that he is right, and that he understands exactly what these minor details mean. They both slowly slink towards the open chairs on either side of him and settle in.

Aether waits patiently for one of them to begin as they clearly try and fail to not look accusatory towards one another. Finally, Mountain breaks the silence with a vague statement about how Dew has to know why he is upset, which the fire ghoul shrugs off like a feather, responding with an odd statement about the weather.

As much as Aether truly wants them to work it out amongst themselves, only using him for a moderator if they need one, it quickly becomes apparent that the two refuse to accomplish anything.

“Please you two, if you don’t want to resolve this for your own sakes then at least try for me. You giving it a fair shot is all I’m asking for.” Aether eventually contributes.

“What even is the use of all this Aeth? Let us just be mad at each other for a week or two and then eventually it will be like it didn’t happen. That’s what always happens.” Dew grumbles.

“Yeah, I know you love us and want to help, but it’s not your duty to try and fix it.” Mountain tacks on.

At least with their irritation pointed at himself, the two ghouls seem to marginally forget about their frustration at one another. Mountain’s comment however gives him a welcome hint that whatever happened is not as trivial as he originally thought.

“Oh trust me this intervention is for selfish reasons.” Aether interjects before Mountain can go on a whole long winded thing about matters they all have hashed out time and time again. “With the touring I don’t get to see you two as much as I would like anymore. Forgive me for wanting to actually have the little time I can spend with you two include you both and actually be pleasant.”

Dew and Mountain shoot each other a peculiar look across the table that he can’t quite place. It’s almost familiar, like a song heard years ago, but he is at a loss to its meaning. It’s weird, normally Aether could interpret the meaning of either of their looks without even thinking about it. He knows the two of them better than he probably knows himself.

Soon a flood of unwelcome thoughts of them forgetting all about the bond they share and him being left behind in the dust start to storm his mind. He knows it’s only a look, but unexpected development is shaking him nonetheless for reasons he can't place.

“I don’t want you guys to slip away is all” he tacks on weakly, silently cursing the slight tremble evident in his voice. He thought he was doing this for them, to mend the gap between the two ghouls, however he can’t help but feel like he has stumbled into a chasm between them and himself as well.

“You could never get rid of either of us even if you wanted to.” one of them declares. Aether is too busy focusing on the sudden grip of both of them launching from each side to pull him into a hug.

If Aether had known that sharing his own minor insecurities that manifested from missing them would have helped the two ghouls get along he would have done so sooner. That of course would mean he would have had to actually acknowledge how he was feeling about it all before now though, so maybe this morning was still the quickest course of action.

“I’m not going to give the details because it was originally about something for you that we still want to be a surprise, but I think both of us would agree that we let the argument get blown way out of proportion and become much more personal than it needed to be.” Mountain explains softly.

Aether feels Dew’s hair tickling his arm as the fire ghoul nods. “He’s right, give us the day to work it out amongst ourselves, but I promise that Mountain and I will take a walk along the good trail and talk it out okay? Without a doubt I can say that we both miss you more than words can say. As long as Mount is okay with it, I would love to meet up in my room after dinner tonight to catch up, just the three of us.”

Aether takes the bright smile finally gracing the earth ghouls face once again as the enthusiastic agreement it is. As he watches Mountain walk off to get trail snacks and Dew shambling to his room to change, he feels a little of their balance click back into place.

No matter how much time moves along the three of them will always have one another to lean on.

#nocturnal writings #the band ghost fanfic #the band ghost #mountain ghoul #aether ghoul #dewdrop ghoul

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gayofthefae · 23 days

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I just realized the absolute wait of El saying "maybe he's right" when Mike told her about Hopper.

That was a reveal. And it meant nothing to her. There is even a romantic trope of the situation they were in and they refused to do it. They could have drawn it out and had El find out at the end (although that would have antagonized Hopper) and that be the big romantic moment, but instead, she finds out in episode 4.

In season 3 episode 2, El breaks up with Mike because he avoided her then lied about it and she didn't know why. In season 3 episode 4, he tells her that the reason was because he didn't want Hopper to break them up...

And she didn't care. She didn't care! Like AT. ALL. Barely even acknowledged it. Then she said that since hanging out with Max, she had realized that him doing that was not the only issue in their relationship so solving that one doesn't solve anything and she was happy to stay single.

Uh.....DAMN. THEY LITERALLY DID THAT. If he had said what he said before she went to Max and that had somehow been the order, I think she would have taken him back. But instead, and instead of having a single conflict and solution, they used that conflict as an OPPORTUNITY, a starting point to jump off of for the next one. They wrapped it all up with that conversation in the first half of the season.

From there, the conflict was Mike telling El he loved her, something that was not the source of their breakup and therefore should not solve it, and El didn't really have a conflict pertaining to him as she was not seeking to initiate anything. Once he genuinely apologized, they got on good terms again and she was more willing to communicate with him about trusting her and allowing her to be independent now that Max had helped her realize that she wanted that.

But at the end of the day....they could have done a romantic angsty plot and didn't. Because that isn't what their arcs are. Instead, they said "yes, the breakup was for made up reasons, but once she was fully informed, she chose to stay broken up because although the original reason for the breakup was a miscommunication, she noticed that she had been happier since breaking up and that was more important."

I will never shut up about how season 3 grew on me as their friendship season and how, in connection to that, they made up about halfway through the season during the m&m scene (which was very downplayed ftr) and remained broken up for 3-4 more episodes.

Mike was trying to tell her he loved her but that was not the source of the breakup so it should not have solved it. Even if it had, he didn't anyways. And if it would have solved it, then why didn't she get back together with him immediately upon knowing? Or at least after a couple of days of him not being able to say it. You might all die again, especially you, there is at least some urgency to the situation. Why not make sure to get back together right before the big battle like Lum@x did in season 4?

And I will always remember the analysis about how her romantic moments with Mike coincide with her grieving Hopper. Here are the facts:

After finding out that the reason for their breakup was a miscommunication, she chose to stay broken up for other reasons she had since come to realize.

After making up and getting to a good place platonically, she did not initiate getting back together and neither did he.

After hearing him say he loved her, she did not initiate getting back together.

When he didn't work up the courage on his own, she did not bring it up to him in order to get back together

After her father died and she was moving across the country, big, jarring changes happening in her life, she initiated getting back together.

She had many an opportunity she did not take, initially directly denying the chance, but even after that seeming content with either getting back together if he initiated it or not if he didn't. That was always my interpretation from my first watch, that formulaically they probably would but she seemed content with either.

When introduced the option, she broke up with him. When given the full information and direct opportunity, she chose not to get back together with him for other, more credible reasons. After making up, when given indirect opportunity, she did not initiate getting back together with him.

tldr: They could have made a thing of it. They could have drawn it out. They could have made it big and romantic - like I thought they were going to when they introduced it in episode 1 as if it were the primary conflict. But they didn't. They said "yes, she broke up with him for faulty reasons, but that was just so she could realize how much she loves being single."

#elmike contrasts #elmike povs #stranger things #el hopper #first watch #elmike breakup #el hopper arc #elmike analysis #the duffer brothers #byler

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laurelsofhighever · 1 year

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Writer’s Year-End Roundup!

I was tagged by the lovely @asaara-writes and I’m going to cop out and tag anyone who wants to do this and hasn’t already XD

Overall, 2022 was a good year. I finally sorted my ideas out enough to get back to longfic. Mostly it was about planning but since that came easily in places I’ve also started proper writing, and as of today, I’m 12 chapters into my Prince Alistair AU and just about ready to start posting.

Outside Dragon Age, DOTA; Dragon’s Blood season 3 gave me some lovely inspiration and I’m pretty proud of te work I did there. The Wayhaven Chronicles also gripped me tight and would not let go, and aside from some solid oneshots I’m now pretty much halfway through the first murder mystery story I’ve ever attempted, complete with vampires. It’s been a lot of fun reconnecting with all the characters I’ve written about in this last year, especially since 2021 was still mostly spent in a nice creative primordial soup waiting for ideas to coalesce.

Special mention to the print version of Falcon, which is a project I started last year and hope to get finished this year so it can sit and look pretty on my shelf.

Words written: 75,307, of which 29,562 has been published. This isn’t as much as I was expecting considering how many hours it feels I’ve put in, but 1) it’s still the length of a pretty hefty novel and 2) I haven’t counted all the words that are just planning or notebook scribbling, so it’s actually a heck of a lot more.

New things I tried: The biggest new thing is the venture into the murder mystery genre with Like Glitter And Gold. Having to work backwards from the crime to the clues meant the whole story has had to be much tighter than I’m used to in terms of detail, which meant having a much more invested plan and many, many conspiracy board diagrams before I could actually start to write. It’s been fun, though. Apart from that, I’ve learned that I’m most efficient when I plan out a rough script for a chapter first and then try to fill it in, instead of writing a detailed draft on the first try. I’ll definitely use this going forward and hopefully it means I’ll have a bigger wordcount for next year.

Fic I spent the most time on: My Prince Alistair AU for sure. Partly because I’m having to replay the game to refresh my memory of the events and transcribe then rearrange a lot of the dialogue, but also because it’s given me a lot of problems with the structure. It’s also how I found out I don’t so well trying to make a polished first draft. Also also, Dragon Age: Origins is a ridiculously long game, with so much talking - 35k words in, and they’ve only just left Lothering!

Fic I spent the least time on: I always feel miserable on my birthday, so this year I channelled that energy into Once More Around The Sun, a Nate x Detective Leah oneshot that I pushed out in a day. Except for the epistolary chapter of Falcon, it’s the most I’ve ever written in a single day, so I’m pretty proud of it. Happy Birthday to me.

Favourite thing I wrote: I’m pretty pleased with everything I’ve written for TWC this year, in particular So Let Us Melt, And Make No Noise, a fluffy, angsty oneshot, and Like Glitter And Gold, the murder mystery longfic, because it’s been something new for me.

Favourite thing I read: New Year’s Resolution: actually bookmark fics when you like them! I have binged works by @serenpedac (TWC), @tarysande (Shakarian), and @viciously-witty (Labyrinth), and very early in the year I finally got around to The Revelation In All Things by @ellenembee, which is one of the most we thought out Cullen x Lavellan fics I’ve read. In terms of published works, I actually read published stuff this year! Highlights include The Lies of Locke Lamora, Nightwatch, Sistersong, and Ivanhoe.

Writing goals for next year: Finish the remaster and print version of Falcon so I can finally put it on my shelf, finish LG&G, finally start a proper first draft of my Post-Blight story, make separate masterposts for Dragon Age and everything else to pin to each of my blogs, and streamline the way I plot for the Prince Alistair AU. Should be simple enough...

#my writing #writing meme #year end roundup

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unforgivablengk · 11 months

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Yalllll I finally started Bleak Creek.

Bleak Creek

I’m listening to the audio book. At first I hated the narrator but that changed quickly. I am halfway through just from driving to a work event Wednesday and back yesterday. I’m at the point that I think is the climax, where they are rolling the ball at each other and Rex’s parents come up with news.

This book is wild and I need a rhink study guide.

1984 RANDL

I’d write more but there’s still stuff from the RandL video I want to say but I’m such a procrastinator.

Basically I think it’s interesting how they used and talked about maps to guide them and how difficult it was. It could be a parallel to people who say all the answers are in the Bible and use the Bible as a map but that that’s really difficult. Also that you can only ask certain types of people for help. This kind of deteriorates since the maps do eventually get them to each other.

Also that the video about recess/fun they missed out on together (what really may they have missed out on together?) is about them running to find each other and stressing that they are running out of time and won’t get there before the sun sets. 😭 and link getting there first and having an angsty time waiting for Rhett.

RANDL VIDEOS

So we know there’s at least 5 videos. We also know the 4th was supposed to be the most “risky.” We also know that the 3rd and 4th had to be switched because of something with production. It seemed like they made this video after the ear biscuits about the 4th being the most risky. So… was this originally the most risky one since it was originally #4?

#tlcobc #rhink #the lost causes of bleak creak #bleak creek #randl #rhett and link #rhett mclaughlin #link neal #1984 #deconstruction

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frostsong · 2 years

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9—04: (EC) DILEMMA.

noun: a difficult situation or problem.

rating: t

characters: jantellot de thelomaire, original characters, euphemie de dansereau

tags: unrequited, post-hw, angsty dragoon questions her purpose in life

summary: an odd reunion in the most unexpected of times.

wordcount: 484

“lieutenant.”

breathlessly he calls out to her, not unlike the others—even with everything said and done there was still fantasy in his eyes as he looked at her. he was an odd case, odder than the vast majority who had shared her bed at some point.

“jantellot.” a curt bob of her chin was all he was going to get—and eyes, of course. he did deserve that much.

“i…” his smile crept wider as he took a step closer—probably still wading out of his own disbelief.

“i didn’t know you were taking part in the reconstruction.“ she scoffed into an open-mouthed smile, still seated as if the stacked crates had been a throne.

“did you think you’d never see me again?” she giggled halfway through her words.

“anyway…there’s more waiting than anybody wants when it comes to what happens next for the order.” inside information—he could take it or leave it as he saw fit. not like there was much to be had from having been a dragoon in the first place. but euphemie was not one to let her bitterness blossom: she would not sit or lie down (at least alone), for it had a bad habit of trying to freeze her in place.

“i see…” nervously his eyes strayed from her own. had the war’s end humbled even him? euphemie would have expected more simmering frustration by way of the veteran—even if he saw far less of the direct action than her brethren dragoons. perhaps he did, but did well to hide it; judging by him having stolen none of her slain quarry she believed him to have more of a head on his shoulders than the other convictors. yet she couldn’t believe that conclusion entirely, for jantellot was well known for carrying his heart on his sleeve.

“and how has the convictory fared?” she was genuinely curious.

“...efforts have been made to transition our services into guarding merchants and travelers to and fro.” there was a quiet pride in his voice, and perhaps he deserved it—but again her mind returned to her dilemma, shared with the rest of her comrades, all downtrodden from a growing lack of purpose:

what happens, now?

jantellot was the least of her worries. all that he and his convictor knights had strove for, deprived of its meaning—

“you ought to visit—with all the waiting it is you speak of. i assure you it’s livelier than it’s ever been. one could say warmer.” if only she could have felt as happy as she should for him and the others—if only her mind could linger and stay in another realm of thought that wasn’t their corner of the congregation, barren and heavy with the silence and growing weight of their new reality.

she and envy did make a terrible pair.

so instead, she smiled and nodded—though her chin never drifted far from her palm.

“i ought to indeed.”

#ffxivwrite2022 #eggpens #jantellot de thelomaire #euphemie de dansereau

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xanfeursel · 5 months

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heard you were bored so here are some questions :) (i realized halfway through that these are all durgetash because those little shits have taken over my mind) do you like leaning into the angst of durgetash or do you prefer the more lighthearted (aside from the atrocities) dynamic? if larian dropped a gortash romance, is there any icks that would absolutely ruin it for you?

or conversely, what would be the best thing they could add in a hypothetical gortash route?

what were your biggest inspirations for lophi and vyper? do you prefer one over the other or are they equal in your eyes?

(hopefully you won't have to answer these since you'll get out of work soon)

HELLO ANON. im sorry to tell you infact waited till i actually got home to answer these because i have!!! THOUGHTS and OPINIONS about the questions asked . thank you very much btw these are all really good questions ill have fun answering

FIRSTLY, it all depends on the kind of durge gortash is being paired w imo. with vyper i tend to lean more into These Two Are Fucking Insane while w/ lophi i lean more into the sort of melancholic 'angsty' side of durgetash that i think can be real yummy too. and it's all because of who vyper and lophi are as characters pre-tadpole, too. vyper liked being a loud insane freakus while lophi was a lot more reserved and kind of a miserable mess, and that informs their relationships w/ the characters around them. i think both are good and fun to explore and i definitely like exploring the more angsty side w vyper x gortash and vice versa w lophi x gortash, so. i guess both. really. LOL .

secondly, going to answer both of the gort romance related questions in one, but i think i'm probably in the unpopular opinion that gortash doesn't really neeeeeeeed a romance and i could go without it in game. i do think he deserves more content and screentime, but that's something i can say about orin also, and frankly a Lot of parts of act 3. me and act 3 have a toxic on/off again relationship. alright.

that being *said*, if i was mr larian and i was to implement a gortash romance, i'd have it be something exclusive to a durge/evil run. or at the very least, have it have consequences with your party (i.e karlach leaving or something. love gort but i do not think you should go off romancing him scott free).

i Do think having it be exclusive to a more evil-aligned run would help add more actual content to doing an evil run (and god knows we need some with how bg3 seems to like punishing people who just want to do the evil options They Gave You) and would make the most sense, but all in all i'd just hope it's handled better than the mizora sex scene cause god how that whole thing is handled still pisses me off. hopefully this all makes sense

tl;dr, its a fun idea but i can very easily go without it especially knowing how the game treated its one other antagonist romance option

now for the lophi and vyper question... i do obviously have my biases towards vyper /looks at my blog theme/, but i genuienlly cannot pick favourites with them besides that... i use them both to explore different aspects of the durge origin in different ways bc despite what some other people say i Do think you can be very flexible w durge as a concept despite the pre-established lore for them ^_^ and i think it's very fun to play around with.

as for specific inspirations, lophi takes a lot of insp from vintage pierrot art + has accidentally gotten a very 1920s makeup vibe in My Mind. i should also note her name comes from the scientific name for anglerfish, cuz thats what i had in mind when giving her those freaky sharp ass teeth i always draw her with

and while of course, both of my durges are trans, lophi specifically was birthed from my want to make a dark urge that leans in as heavily as she possibly could in the whole trans allegory thing. so theres that as well!

vyper's specific inspos are harder for me to pinpoint cause he's much more of a 'made up as i went' character than lophi, given he was my First dark urge and i didnt really fully know what i was going into all this yet while making him (and also i was maybe a little bit high while doing so...lol) THAT SAID THOUGH, i did initially make him with akira fudo from devilman in mind. he has the horn style he does because it reminded me of devilman ... although the akira insp is very lose and barely effects his character now.. ~_~ despite bg3 being my main fixation atm devilman is still a very very important piece of media to me so vyper being loosely akira-pilled is not too surprising if you know me well enough lololol

#rev txt #THANK YOU AGAIN FOR THIS ASK THIS WAS REALLY FUN FOR ME TO ANSWER #oc:lophi #oc:vyper #long post

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zodiyack · 3 years

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In Regards Of My Ex

Pairing: Niklaus Mikaelson x Female!Reader

Warnings: Swearing, angst

Words: 2,125

Summary: Niklaus believes deceitful gossip from Aurora De Martel about his wife and takes his anger out on her. As a result, Y/n leaves and finds comfort with Cami and Davina, who call in backup to confront the big bad hybrid about his big bad dumbassery.

Note: I’ve been in a fluffy mood as of recently HOWEVER this idea was sparked when I was feeling angsty™ so...sorry but also not sorry?

Taglist: @matth1w, @redspaceace-writes, @fandom-puff, @simonsbluee, @darling-i-read-it, @jenepleurepasbaby, @sebastianstanslefteyebrow, @dpaccione

Masterlist | The Originals Masterlist

Part One. Part Two. Part Three.

“That wife of yours has been sneaking around with my brother. Breaking more hearts than just yours from what I can see.”

“I suppose some people just can’t see the worthiness of the king in front of them. If I were your wife, I wouldn’t be like Y/n. I’d be committed you and never give you fib tales like her.”

“You are aware that Y/n has been plotting something nefarious against you, aren’t you?”

“I know you wanted to marry someone just as sinister as you, but perhaps you should’ve checked where her loyalty lied before tying that knot.”

Aurora fed him stories such as these, and many more, each conclusion of the lies spewing from her mouth something appalling about Y/n. At first, Klaus didn’t listen, but as her stories grew worse and worse, the faux feeling of treachery intensified. He knew it was unwise to believe anything that came from the spiteful, jealous woman...yet, his distress caused pain to strike his heart and he yearned to know the truth.

Although, in this case, the “truth” wasn’t actually very truthful.

She often told him things like that Lucien was going after his girl for the second time, first with her when she had her chance and now, his beloved wife. Klaus merely brushed it off with an honest “he tries and I’ll stake him first chance I get”. However, Aurora wasn’t finished yet. She continued to lie and deceive Niklaus about the woman who she accused of replacing her in his life. The envy and loathing Aurora felt for Y/n was her motivator, but the woman was too far up a wall to need one in the first place.

“Are you telling me the truth?” He growled, keeping his eyes trained at the wall in front of them.

“Why do you ask?”

“I need to know I can trust your bold claims. So answer me, Aurora, are you telling me the truth?”

That smug little grin, masking her deluding ways. “Of course, Nik. I would never lie to you.” Her welcome into his trust was unsurprisingly taken advantage of when she traced her finger down his arm and then brought her hand up his abdomen slowly. Klaus shoved her invasive hand off of his chest though, giving her a warning glare.

“Thank you for informing me.” That was all he said to her before he made his way out of the room in the most hurry she’d ever seen him in.

Aurora smiled conceitedly. Her plans were on the right track. Whilst Nik didn’t have the same feelings for her now as he did way back during the beginning of their story, but Aurora was determined to stir those feelings from the dead as vampirism did him and her.

She drawled under her breath, “I will have you again, Nik.” her mischievous smile grew wider, “I will have you again, and nothing can stop me this time.”

“Blasphemy!” Niklaus shouted, veins popping out from the rage coursing in his system. He neared Y/n again, the slight fear in her eyes drawing a pause for a second, guilt stilling him, but his anger took the reigns once more.

“It’s not blasphemy! I would never lie to you!”

“The falsity of your deception proves otherwise, love.” He smirked, raising his brows as to question if she would battle his words yet again. Proof was what he needed, but his vexation had drowned out all logic, including his ability to see the proof he wanted so desperately.

“What deception? What falsehood do you believe to have come from my mouth? When I married you, I vowed to be truthful and loyal. You of all people on this fucking earth should know I always keep a vow.” She narrowed her eyes at him. The betrayal he thought he felt was temporary and fabricated, but hers was 100% genuine and seething within her.

“You say that but if you were indeed an untrue person, your answer would be no different.”

“Why do you insist on proving me a traitor!? What has pushed you so far past your breaking point that you actually accuse me, your wife, as a viper?”

“Don’t you pretend like you don’t know the malicious schemes you’ve plotted against me or the affairs you’ve had with men who obviously aren’t your husband!” He couldn’t stop himself now; “I’ve loved you for centuries and you decide to be disloyal and ill-natured?!”

“Says who?!”

“Says Aurora!” After the words flew from his mouth, a tiny part of him realized just how fucked up it sounded. Just how fucked up it was that he believed her over his wife, but the hybrid was stubborn. He was too stubborn to change his belief or admit his fallacious accusations were unjust without proper evidence.

Y/n knew Aurora and Klaus’ story. Her knowledge of the ancient and long forgotten tale made her reaction thousands of times worse. “Aurora? ...Huh. You choose to believe her- that manipulative, lying bitch, over me? I thought you knew me better than that.” She wiped away a rebellious tear, “I thought I knew you better than that.”

Disappointment hung heavy on her features, drawing a feeling of shame from Klaus. Y/n glared at him one last time, her knitted brows and vaguely teary eyes evidence of the heavy-heartedness that overwhelmed her. She bit the inside of her mouth and shook her head disapprovingly before turning and walking out the front gate-doors of the Mikaelson mansion. Klaus was alone.

The sounds of Davina’s giggles echoed, Cami sitting in front of her and chuckling heartfully as well. Their laughter died off when they noticed Y/n sulking through the front doors of Rousseau's. The place was empty aside from the two women having drinks and a friendly chat. Then Y/n entered and found a seat. The atmosphere, once cheery, suddenly felt melancholy.

“Hey, Y/n, you alright?” Camille’s smile was wiped from her lips. She felt empathy for Klaus’ wife and, as a friendly person in general, she felt overcome with the need to help solve the complication that made her feel so down in the dumps.

“I’m-” She was ready to say fine, Davina and Cami knew it, but she broke down in tears before she could even shape an “o” with her lips. Both women jumped up immediately and sat in the seats beside Y/n. Though Davina couldn’t stand Klaus, she actually liked Y/n and seeing her hurt sent searing pain into her own heart.

“It’s okay, hun,” Cami wrapped an arm over Y/n’s shoulder, her other hand rubbing her other shoulder and arm comfortingly, “take as long as you need, there’s no pressure, no rush, none of that. We’ve got you.”

And so they did. The two women took turns holding Y/n as she cried, and before long, she was ready to talk. She explained Klaus’ anger and the source of their fight, the source of the fake news he’d lashed out because of. Davina and Cami shared a glance when Aurora was mentioned, both women already hating her but equally despising her even more now. Y/n sobbed, crying into Cami’s shoulder about wanting Klaus to just believe her. She said she loved him and because of that, she felt pained by his lack of belief in her.

“He’s not worth it if he can’t see how wrong that decision was-”

“I know, but he’s my husband. I vowed to love him always and forever, to never leave his side, and I intend to keep that vow...so long as he doesn’t do anything to fuck it up any more than he already has.”

The sun began to sink into the dark, not fully quite yet, but still creating it’s beautiful array of colors as a final act before disappearing for the night. About halfway through Y/n’s rant, Cami called Hayley and gave her a summary of what she knew so far. A promise of arriving as soon as she could was returned on Hayley’s end before the line went dead and Cami returned to the table.

Still not entirely after sunset yet, Hayley swung open the door to Rousseau's, catching Davina and Y/n off guard. Despite being the one who called her, Cami stayed seated. Y/n and the witch beside her exchanged confused expressions.

“Are you just gonna sit there or are you gonna tell me what the hell I need to do to Klaus?”

Y/n chuckled softly, wiping away more of the salty tears, before standing and walking over to Hayley, greeting her with a hug. “You don’t have to get involved if you don’t want to-”

“No, trust me, I have to and I want to.” She pulled away and dropped her warm smile, giving Y/n the most serious look she could muster. And as she was Hayley Marshall, it was effortlessly pretty fucking serious. “Now, I want you tell me everything,” the mom voice came out to play, “don’t leave a single detail out. Then, we can discuss what we’re going to do about it.”

“Where is he?”

Rebekah had been informed by the pissed off werewolf and bartender everything that had happened, resulting in her becoming equally upset. She welcomed Hayley inside the gates and nodded her head up the stairs. “I haven’t said anything to him, so you’ll be lucky enough to catch him by surprise.”

The werewolf nodded in understanding before pacing toward the stairs irritability. “Thanks.”

“Make it hurt!” Rebekah’s voice faded away as she walked out the gates, leaving Hayley alone to find Niklaus.

Atop the stairs, she found no sign of anyone whatsoever, but that was only on the outside. If Klaus happened to be inside on of the many rooms, she wouldn’t waste her time searching. Instead, she waited, leaning against the railing and doing a breathing exercise Y/n taught her during one lonely full-moon.

After minutes of waiting, Klaus finally walked out of a door and started for the stairs. It wasn’t longer than a minute before he stopped in his tracks and realized he’d missed something. He shot a double take in Hayley’s direction, a puzzled expression quickly finding way to his face. It seemed as though he was contemplating whether or not her unexpected appearance was a good thing or a bad thing.

When he seemingly couldn’t make up his mind, staring a few minutes longer, a heavy sigh left her mouth. She was ticked off with him before, but after hearing everything Y/n had to say, she was furious. No, more than furious. The blood boiling rage was incessantly pounding in her head, all she wanted was cause destruction and pain. A rare thing for her.

But now was not the time to lash out, not yet. She inhaled and exhaled, Hayley shifted on her feet and looked around before turning her head to Klaus and beckoned him over to her with a come-hither motion of her index finger.

“What is it?”

She looked at him, flabbergasted that he’d even ask a question as stupid as that, “What is it? What is it, Klaus?” Hayley slapped him, the man doubling back and blinking in astonishment. And not the good kind.

“How dare you lay your hands on me, you-”

“So you’re gonna yell at me now?” She crossed her arms, and unimpressed look resting upon her face. “You know, personally, I think Y/n is better off without you but she’s broken and has been bawling her eyes out nonstop for hours on end, drinking away all the pain that you’ve formed into a stake and shoved into her chest.”

He stopped, fury fleeing his face as he experienced what felt like her words body-slamming into him.

“And guess who’s been there to pick out the splinters?” She poked her finger against her chest over and over again. “Me!” Her eyes never left his, telling him just how sincere about this she really was. “Me! Cami- even Davina!” Hayley threw her hands in the air, emphasizing the shock that came with the information. “Rebekah’s on her way over now, and I’m sure Elijah will see to it that he comforts his sister-in-law as much as he can, but you?”

“I-”

She cut him off, temper still unquenched, thirsty for vengeance. “Let me finish.” She growled. Hayley looked around the room in attempt to calm herself, but it was to no avail.

“You got her into this mess. I just hope you get both of you guys out of it.” She flicked her eyes back to his, giving him her infamous dead eyed glare. “I really hope you do. And you better do it soon. Because I won’t be there to pick the splinters out for you when she realizes she doesn’t need your sorry ass.”

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onlythebrave-mp3 · 3 years

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my top 2020 fics!

okay! so i recently jumped back into this fandom after a couple of years, and started reading fic again, and i wanted to rec some of my favorites that were written this year. there’s ten on this list, and i probably could’ve done like 30 but this is already so long lol. it’s kind of in a general order, so #1 is my fav for this year, but i tried not to focus on the ranking too much because it stresses me out and i don’t need any more anxiety so it’s ended up being a pretty vague system.

1. Our Lives, Non-Fiction (113k) by @indiaalphawhiskey

listen. I’ve reblogged this fic like 10 times. I’ve read it twice already and it came out less than 3 weeks ago. It is an instant classic, right up there with fics like TIF or Wear it like a Crown. It has gorgeous, gorgeous writing, a thoroughly developed plot and well written character development, and such a compelling story. It is a marcel/louis fic, and I usually shy away from that kind of thing, but i’m so glad i didn’t this time because god, this one is so good. Seriously, if anyone ends up reading it, come and rant to me about it and we can cry together. Halfway through the second chapter, I created a note on my phone so I could keep track of everything I loved, and my comment on that fic is essentially a love letter to @indiaalphawhiskey. It's just so good. If you’re going to read one fic off this list, read this one.

2. Loving You's a Bloodsport (106k) by @rosesau

okay i’m pretty sure this one made me cry like four times, which is a feat for me because i’m not usually a crier. Its soulmates with a little bit of a twist, and the plot is so well developed. Harry and louis’ feelings and their progression are written so vividly and i wish i could forget that i read it so i could go and read it again for the first time. It's also got some enemies to lovers, which is my favorite trope, and all of the side characters are beautifully developed as well. Prince!Harry, soldier!Louis, angsty soulmates. What more could you want? Oh and if you’re not convinced enough, here is a quote that fucking follows me around because its so beautiful: “Love and hate are two sharp knives balanced on a very fine line and I’ve cut myself on both because of you.” (ohmygod)

3. Mine Would Be You (114k) by @crinkle-eyed-boo

okay this one is listed at number three but it really should be 1c lol. I started this one at 11 pm like an idiot, and i don’t think i slept that night at all. It's Exes to lovers, and it's so well written. It switches between the past and the present, it's heartbreakingly beautiful, the breakup and resolution are both so realistically written as well, and there's a great ot5 plotline too that i really loved. This one was also an instant classic- i bookmarked it before i even finished reading it. It's also got beautiful art and Louis and Harry are both artists in NYC, which I'm a slut for. Please read this one, it's so good.

okay i just realized how long this got so i’m putting the rest under the cut

4. The Murmur of Yearning (93k) by @mediawhorefics (for some reason tumblr isn’t letting me tag them??) | mediawhore on ao3

I just finished this one, and my goddddddd it's so good. I read it in a day, and it's essentially 100k. Which isn’t that unusual for me except I did skip a class to get through it (an exam prep class. Not my finest moment but I passed. so.) There are tons of original characters that draw you in, and the whole world that is created is so fascinating and detailed. There's also no homophobia, so if you like historical fics but get triggered by that kind of thing, this is for you! Also, if you’re worried about the non-con elements, I'm sure you could message the author but also feel free to check in with me! I’ll definitely be rereading it in the near future and am totally up for discussing and crying over this fic with anyone.

5. Remember Me Fondly by @bluejeanlouis | kiddle on ao3

ahhhhhhh this one made me sob too! It's set in both the present and the past, and I fell in love with all of the characters. This one is also heartbreaking, but I promise there’s a happy ending. Also, they way this fic deals with the fame and the homophobia and tours that harry and louis went through -even if it isn’t actually canon and is set in the 90s- is so vividly painful and realistic. It's written half through a journalist’s eyes and half through harry and louis, yet the switch in pov is so seamless and fluid and adds so much to the piece. 11/10.

6. Nothing But You On My Mind (83k) by @absoloutenonsense | nonsensedarling on ao3

okay. I started this in the middle of the night, and told myself I'd read one chapter to see if I liked it and then I would go to sleep. I'm pretty sure I read like 6. It sucks you in right from the beginning, and there's such a well developed plot. And it's so unpredictable and all of the details are so nuanced and tiny and then you look back at everything after you’ve finished it and go oh. Ohhhhhh. This one is also enemies to lovers. Are we sensing a pattern here?

7. An Invincible Summer (44k) by @twopoppies | Brooklyn_Babylon on ao3

so as you can see this one is only 45k but i just love it so much that i’m rec’ing in anyways. It’s such a gentle, exploratory piece of literal art, and I kind of want to stay in the world that was created forever. Its set in the 1940s on a farm and i know @twopoppies has said that it started off as an excuse for barn sex, but it such a vivid story and its heartbreaking and emotional and uplifting all at once and please please please go read this. The only critique I have of it is that it's only 40k.

8. Somewhere in Between Lightning (99k) by @nauticalleeds, @shiningdistraction, and jassy117 on ao3

So this one's exes-to-lovers as well, and it's written in such a realistic way. Also i’m in love with the concept of louis on love island, despite the fact that he said he hates it. There's a sauna scene that I still think about sometimes. It's got just the right amount of angst and fluff and pining and despite the fact that it's set on a show that is usually pretty dramatic and unrealistic, this is written in a really beautiful but pragmatic way. I love it. i’ve got it downloaded on my phone so I can read little snippets of it sometimes if I have to wait somewhere.

9. You’ve Got My Devotion (Hate You Sometimes) (95k) by @harryrainbows | lucythegoosey on ao3

god so this one incorporates some of Fine Line into it, and wouldn’t say it's a song fic so much as it is written as a canon compliant fic that ties harry’s songs into it and its done so fucking well oh my god. Harry and Louis are exes in this one too (lol i'm sorry) and the build up of them getting together and the pining and longing is written really well.

10. At Risk, I Fold (15k) by @bearmustard | clare328 on ao3

so i know this one is only 15k, but I put this in the list anyways. It's canon compliant, and it does mention the stunts (as stunts), but don’t let that deter you. Harry and Louis are written almost exactly as i’ve imagined them, and this one is such a heartbreaking look into the resilience and love and bravery that they have. It made me cry despite the fact that it’s not really a glum fic. The only reason it is last on the list is because it's shorter and i was mostly intending this to be a long fic rec. The love that they have for each other really shines through in this one, and it’s super gentle and soft and sad and happy all at once and just please go read it.

#my fic rec #hoping this doesnt flop lol #if people like this i might do more #we'll see lmao #also #if you ask me who tops/bottoms #in any of these fics #you owe me $10 #reading fics specifically for who takes it up the arse is weird <3

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sailordiamondkitty · 3 years

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So... I've been on "PAW Patrol Movie" in cinema recently. And as much as I don't like the animated series (too childish for my tastes), I simply ADORED this movie. The soundtrack, the animation, the story... All PERFECT 🥰 Well, except of the fact that some scenes were less than perfect and needed some redo... So I grabbed the pen (keyboard) and wrote my version 🙃 It's a bit more angsty than original and I definitely wouldn't put it in kid's show. But it was fun to write nevertheless 🙂

The scene I'm talking about is 'Chase rescues Ryder' scene. So I started with that and went my way a few minutes after 😉 Enjoy

Oh and for the ones not familiar with the movie, here's the original scene:

youtube

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Ryder waited impatiently for the elevator to reach the top of the ridiculously high tower. He huffed irritated, as the idea of building something such high was as crazy, as it was dangerous. The soft ping indicated that he finally arrived at the destination and the door slid open.

‘Mayor Humdinger?’ He called out, stumbling out of the elevator, the storm outside easily swaying the already unstable tower, his eyes searching the office.

‘Yes, how can I help you?’ The man suddenly appeared behind the desk at the far end of the room, laying his hand casually on the flat surface of the table. The demeanour changed drastically when he noticed a person by the door. ‘Ryder? What are you doing here?’ He snarled furiously, his pack of cats hissing, sharing the despise for the boy with their owner.

‘This tower isn’t safe!’ Ryder called, trying to stabilize his movements. ‘We’ve got to get you out of here.’

The moment he finished speaking, the lights blinked and went down, darkness enveloping the room in an instant.

‘Oh no, the power’s out. That means the elevator’s dead. We have to go now!’ The boy tried convincing the man again, turning on the flashlight on his suit, the small light giving him at least a bit of comfort.

‘Nice try!’ Humdinger answered, crossing his arms. ‘I’m not going anywhere with you!’

Suddenly the room swayed again, this time harder and the sound of metal breaking sounded from outside. They were running out of time. Humdinger seemed to finally understand that, quickly lifting himself from the chair.

‘Okay, fine! I’ll go with you’ he decided, trying not to sound scared. He made his way toward the elevator, his cats attaching themselves to his legs, restricting man’s movements. ‘But I want to make it very clear, this is not a rescue! It’s… uh... an assisted exit!’ Humdinger exclaimed imperiously.

‘You can call in whatever you want, as long as you get in the elevator now’ Ryder replied, resisting the urge to roll his eye at the man’s antics. ‘I’ll release the cables manually from above’ he explained, using Mayor Humdinger’s body to lift himself up to the elevator’s hatch. ‘Once I’ve lowered you down safely, I’ll repel down the elevator shaft.’

‘Hmph, show-off’ Mayor murmured to himself, correcting the cylinder on his head.

Ryder bit down the reply as he looked down on the man in the elevator.

‘Even though we’ve had our personal differences over the years, I take no pleasure in doing this’ he said instead, his hand on a lever.

’Doing what?’ Humdinger asked warily. Ryder didn’t answer, instead pulling the lever, releasing the elevator as it started falling down at a rapid speed, Humdinger’s screams feeling the air.

‘Heh, actually that’s pretty satisfying’ he laughed to himself, eying the disappearing shape of an elevator and counting. ‘Three one thousand, four one thousand, five one thousand’ when counted to five, Ryder quickly pushed the lever back, stopping the elevator before it could crash at the bottom of the shaft.

While attaching grabbling hook to the metal bar, Ryder opened the communication channel.

‘Hey pups’ he called out ‘Humdinger’s out, I’m coming down.’

‘Nice job Ryder, see you on the ground’ came a reply, as he started descending.

Suddenly a gush of wind broke a part of the shaft, metal panel smashing on the other side.

‘Whoa, that’s not good’ boy commented, worry on his face. The next two panels above broke, nearly hitting him, as they fell. ‘Oh, that’s very not good!’

He continued descending, this time at a much faster pace, trying to leave the attached tower before it would, inevitably and definitely sooner than later, break completely. Wind howling through the shaft shook the rope, throwing Ryder over the shaft walls as he descended. He stopped the movement, trying to stabilize himself and that’s when another panel was torn out, this time right next to him. He stared at it for a few seconds, scared, trying to quickly decide how to best omit it. Suddenly the tower screeched, the metal holders finally loosing the battle with hazardous weather. Ryder’s terrified scream broke through the howling wind, as the tower fell, burying itself into the next building.

Ryder coughed, looking over the surrounding. Falling with the tower was not a pleasant experience and he made a mental note to try and avoid it for the future. He absentmindedly pushed the emergency beacon on his suit, red light flashing steadily. He eyed the debris that blocked his leg, stopping him from moving away from the site. He tried pushing it away, although with no avail. Ryder huffed, leaning his head back and closing his eyes.

‘Looks like I’ll have to wait for the rescue’ he told himself, the pain in his crushed leg indicating it was most probably broken.

At least the storm wasn’t bothering him here, the remains of fallen tower successfully blocking the wind. Some small parts of debris and dust fell from the ceiling and he coughed again.

‘Ryder?’ he heard a concerned voice from the side, a familiar one. He looked that way to see Chase descending the debris, running towards him.

‘Chase!’ he called, happiness in his voice. ‘I can’t believe you’ve found me.’

‘You can always count on me, Ryder’ German Shepherd puppy exclaimed with confidence as Ryder turned off his emergency beacon, switching it back to flashlight.

The broken wires shot a spark of electricity and Chase looked at them, worried.

‘Come on’ puppy said, turning his gaze back to Ryder. ‘We gotta get out of here’

‘I can’t , I’m stuck’ the boy replied, trying to push the large debris off his leg.

‘On three, pull as hard as you can’ Chase decided quickly, jumping over the broken rubble and positioning himself behind Ryder. ‘One.. Two.. Three!’

Ryder pulled the leg as Chase grabbed his shirt in his teeth, trying to help. After few seconds puppy fell backwards, as his teeth slid off the cloth.

‘It won’t budge’ the boy exclaimed, looking back at his friend, feeling hopeless. So even their strength combined weren’t enough.

‘One more try!’ Chase decided and Ryder obeyed, pushing the rubble again. At the same time, German Shepherd pup circled around, sliding under the fallen part, pushing it from underneath. They struggled for a while but finally managed to free boy’s leg. As he stumbled backwards, Chase quickly run from under the debris, managing not to get crushed by it. They breathed heavily, catching breath after the struggle.

‘We made it! Ryder, we made it!’ Chase jumped in the air happily, running over to his friend. He stopped abruptly though, seeing the pained expression on boy’s face. ‘Ryder..?’

‘I think it’s broken’ his friend answered, pointing at his leg. ‘It won’t be easy for me to get out of here in this state’ he added.

Chase immediately positioned himself at Ryder’s hurt side.

‘Lean on me, I’ll help you downstairs’ he exclaimed. Ryder didn’t hesitate, as he put his hand on puppy’s back, stabilizing himself.

‘You’re a good friend, Chase’ he smiled, as they took a few small steps toward the exit.

‘You are always there for me. It’s my turn to help you this time’ German Shepherd replied with honesty.

They were halfway through, when the nearby lighting shook the building. Some dust have fallen from the ceiling and Ryder looked up. He noticed the cracks all over the ceiling, small debris falling already.

Another shake and it was too late.

‘Watch out!’ Ryder shouted, pushing Chase away mere seconds before the rubble collapsed on the boy.

The weather finally stabilized when Skye crushed her helicopter into the machine, successfully ending the abnormal storm. She used her jetpack to fly down to the street, joining the cheering, as other PAW Patrol members surrounded her.

‘Do you see Chase or Ryder anywhere?’ Zuma asked, looking around to find the missing friends.

‘No, maybe they’re somewhere else’ Liberty wondered.

Suddenly there was a buzz on the comms and Chase’s worried voice came through.

‘Puppies, we need help!’ he almost shouted ‘We’re on the other building. Ryder’s crushed under the debris! I… I can’t get him out! And he’s not answering me either!’

‘We’ll be right there!’ Marshall replied. ‘Liberty, get some men to help us out, I’m not sure our strength would be enough to free Ryder. And call an ambulance too, it might be needed. Rest of you, follow me!’

The puppies rushed to the entrance of a building, as Liberty carried on her part of a mission. They didn’t have much time, as Ryder needed medical attention. Luckily the power in the city was back on as soon, as the storm ended, so they hastily made their way toward the elevator.

‘Chase, which floor are you on?’ Zuma asked, as the door opened.

‘15th, please hurry’ came a quick answer.

‘Don’t worry, we’re on our way’ Skye reassured him, as the door slid close and the elevator moved upwards.

‘Liberty, when you’re finished, join us on 15th floor’ Rocky called the Adventure City’s pup who became the newest member of PAW Patrol just recently.

‘I’m on it, see you at the top!’ she answered, the sound in the background indicating she’s already on her way with a backup. ‘The ambulance will be here shortly too, just finished the call.’

‘Good, we’ve arrived already, looking for Chase and Ryder’ Marshall said as the elevator stopped and opened.

‘Chase, where are you?’ Rubble called. The place was filled with fallen debris and parts of what used to be Mayor Humdinger’s tower.

‘Over here’ German Shepherd emerged from behind one of the biggest piles of rubble. ‘Quick, help me get him out!’

Another ping indicated that Liberty just arrived at the scene. They joined other puppies and together hastily made their way toward Chase.

The debris was huge and all they could see of Ryder, was his head and one arm, the rest buried underneath fallen parts of walls and ceiling. He was unconscious and bruised all over, from what was visible.

‘I tried to pull him out but I’m not strong enough’ German Shepherd pup explained.

‘And it’s a good thing you didn’t’ replied a tall, brown-haired man, one of the few accompanying Liberty. He crouched next to the puppy, eyeing the debris. ‘We need to carefully remove all of the rubble’ he instructed his companions. ‘Make sure not to move the boy, we don’t know how bad are the injuries.’

The work went swiftly, although not as fast, as the puppies would have wanted. About halfway through the work, the paramedics came and helped remove rest of the debris. Ryder was then moved carefully on the stretcher, the medics quickly looking for any visible injuries.

‘Well, his left leg is definitely broken, no doubt about it’ paramedic exclaimed, motioning the men to pick up the stretcher. ‘And probably right arm too. I don’t like the bruise on his forehead but it doesn’t seem to be very serious, hopefully. He’ll be fine, no grave injuries” he added, seeing the worried looks on puppies’ snouts, especially Chase’s. He leaned to pet pup’s head.

‘You did great, we’ll take it from here’ said the other medic, as they made their way towards the elevator.

The party exited the building, an ambulance parked not far from the entrance. People crowded the street, watching Ryder being put inside.

‘Poor boy…’ some lady gasped, while other nodded, agreeing with her.

‘He’s still just a child’ another added. ‘It should not have happen.’

‘It’s Mayor Humdinger’s fault!’ a man from within the crowd shouted, and people suddenly parted, showing the purple-dressed men in a middle of escaping.

‘What? How is this my fault?’ he argued angrily, the cats hissing by his side. ‘I didn’t ask to be rescued in the first place! Why should I be responsible?’

But nobody listened. Angry shouting escalated, people closing in on Humdinger. He screamed, scared, as he was enveloped by the crowd.

Chase didn’t look at the commotion, his attention solely on a unmoving frame of Ryder in an ambulance. As the paramedics began closing the door, he rushed forward and jumped inside.

‘I’m going with Ryder’ he exclaimed, laying next to the boy.

If the medic was surprised by a sudden movement, he didn’t show it. He closed the door and made his way toward the front of the car, as the other started the engine.

‘Come on, let’s follow them in our vehicles’ Liberty decided. ‘Skye, you take Chase’s police car, since your helicopter is broken.’

‘Yeah, will have to ask Ryder for a new one’ Skye answered sheepishly. ‘I really hope he got an insurance for it.’

‘Don’t worry, I’m sure he’ll figure something out’ Rocky cheered her up, putting his paw on her. ‘For now let’s focus on getting to the hospital.’

Other puppies barked with an agreement and split to get into their vehicles. Then they followed an ambulance, not noticing the frantic escape of Mayor Humdinger, as he managed to get free from the crowd. Not that it mattered. All it mattered now was Ryder.

First thing that Ryder felt was pain in his left leg. Broken, he remembered. He tried opening his eyes, but a bright light from a lamp caused him to close them again. He grunted, as he prepared himself for another try. This time slower, he let his eyes accustom to the lighting. He was in a room, hospital, judging by the look of it. There was something on his right, warm and fluffy, pressed to his side. Ryder moved his head carefully and saw Chase sleeping next to him on a bed. Boy’s moving must have woken him up, as he shifted and yawned, stretching his paws. Eyes locked with Ryder and puppy jumped up.

‘Ryder!’ He shouted happily. ‘You’re okay!’

‘I guess I am’ the boy answered, laughing softly. ’What happened?’

‘I freed you from the debris, we were trying to leave the building’ Chase answered. ‘You… there was a lighting nearby. It caused the ceiling to collapse. You pushed me aside but…’ German Shephard’s eyes filled with sadness and regret. ‘Liberty got some citizens to help us remove the rubble, then they moved you to an ambulance.’

‘Oh, Chase…’ Ryder moved slowly, embracing the pup. ‘It’s alright, we’re alright.’ He reassured him.

‘But you were hurt! I couldn’t do anything to help you!’ Chase argued. ‘I failed you…’

‘No, Chase, you didn’t fail me!’ answered the boy with a shock on his face. ‘You are the bravest pup I’ve ever met. I mean do you know any other who would jump over to the next building to reach me? I sure don’t. If it wasn’t for you, I would be still stuck there.’

The door suddenly opened, and a doctor entered a room with rest of the PAW Patrol behind him. He looked up from his notebook, noticing Ryder and Chase. A warm smile appeared on his lips.

‘Ah, Ryder, I see you’re awake now’ he said, moving to stand near the bed.

‘RYDER!!’ cried the puppies in unison, jumping on a bed to cuddle with their friend, licking his face happily.

‘Alright, alright, if you want him to get healed properly, I advise to give him a room to breathe’ the doctor laughed. ‘How are you feeling, my boy?’

‘Well, my leg and arm hurt and I’m a bit sore’ Ryder answered after a while, when puppies finally decided to stop licking him. ‘Other than that, I’m good.’

‘You’ve had an amazing luck. Except broken leg and arm, as you noticed, you’re uninjured. I advise lot of relax and you should be back to normal in about few months.’

‘Don’t worry, we’ll take care of him, doc!’ Liberty barked happily, swinging her tail. ‘Hear that, Ryder? No missions for you!’

Ryder laughed at that, along with doctor. Everything was fine.

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So there it is, hope you liked it 🙂 I noticed a few things I could change here and there, as I posted, but I decided to not rewrite the whole thing again 😅

#kitty aunt writes #paw patrol #chase #ryder #a bit of angst #redo of an original scene #more realistic that way IMO #not suited for kids tho i guess #but still fun to write #Youtube

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just--another--daydreamer · 4 years

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Jealousy

Izuku Midoriya x male reader

» Fandom: My hero academia » Genre: idk it’s a lil angsty » Requested (by anon): This one could be cute Izuku Midoriya X Male Reader HCs How does Izuku act when he's jealous? » Warnings: overthinking » Author's Note: the request said “cute” but my brain said nope... this turned out very different from my original plan idk. it’s also kinda long

Headcanon/scenario suggestions are open

You can find a link to my Masterlist in my bio

Izuku doesn’t easily get jealous over things he can’t change. For all his life, he had been surrounded by people with powerful quirks and instead of being jealous, he admired and studied them to become stronger

But when it comes to things that he can change; he can’t stop the feeling of envy slowly consuming him

So that’s exactly what happened when he saw you hanging out with Iida and Uraraka more and more

At first, he didn’t think much of it. You were all in the same friend group, and why the hell should Izuku mind his boyfriend hanging out with friends? There was no reason to be jealous

That, however, changed quickly when you cancelled your plans to go out into the city with Izuku

“Oh, that’s okay,” Izuku told you. “May I ask why you’re cancelling last minute?”

You hesitated. A little too long, until the point where it was suspicious. “I have plans with Iida and Uraraka instead.”

As soon as you were out of sight, Izuku began to doubt himself and overthink. Why did you hesitate to tell him? Why did you cancel your plans with him to go out with Iida and Uraraka instead? The four of you could have gone out together, so you clearly didn’t want him with you, right? Was it something he did or said? Maybe you didn’t like him anymore? Maybe-

Izuku knew a way or two to stop himself from getting consumed by his thoughts. Usually he would work out or do his homework, but this time, neither of them helped clear his mind. He kept spiralling down and down and down, and there seemed to be no end

He thought about texting you or calling you to ask if something was wrong. So many drafts of long messages were typed out and deleted again, before Izuku figured that he should talk to you in person

Iida, Uraraka and you came back late. A few of the other students had already gone to their rooms to sleep so the common area was fairly empty. Izuku was sitting on one of the couches, impatiently waiting while fidgeting with the zipper of his jacket. At first, he had tried following the others’ conversations, but soon their voices blended into one, making it impossible for Izuku to follow any of them. He was once again left with his thoughts

So, when you finally came through the main entrance, yawning in exhaustion from your long day at school and in the city, Izuku was a shaking mess

He watched as you said goodnight too Iida and Uraraka before you spotted him on the couch

You walked towards him and Izuku decided to meet you halfway, forcing himself to not look too nervous

“Do you want to eat dinner together?” Izuku asked and forced a smile. “Oh sorry, Izuku, but I had dinner in the city.”

“That’s alright.” He felt his heart drop. Ever since you had moved into the dorms, it was your tradition to eat dinner together

“It’s sweet that you waited though,” you told him. “Hey, how about you get some dinner and eat it in my room while I do my homework for tomorrow? If you sneak in quickly, Iida won’t see you and yell at you about food in the dorms.”

Before Izuku could stop himself, he agreed. Though, that sounded like a good time to talk to you about everything so maybe it wasn’t too bad after all

He ended up sitting on your bed, quietly eating his dinner while you sat at your desk doing your homework. Still not sure about how to bring up the topic, Izuku got lost in his thoughts and blocked you every time you tried starting a conversation

“Izuku, is something wrong?” He looked up and watched you as you sat down on the bed next to him. “You’ve been quiet. Did something happen?”

“Oh, it’s just…” Izuku could feel his cheeks redden and sighed to loosen up a little. “It’s just that I was kind of disappointed when you went out today with Iida and Uraraka and didn’t take me with you… It probably sounds silly, I’m sorry.” He turned his face away from you

“Wait, Izuku… Are you jealous?” – “Me? Jealous? No way! I mean – yeah.”

For a split second, he let himself take a glimpse at your face and he saw a sympathetic yet amused smile

“Izuku, I would’ve loved having you with us in the city today, but that would’ve spoiled the surprise.” – “Surprise?” – “Yeah. Because someone’s birthday is coming up.”

“Someone’s birthday,” Izuku mumbled. Who could that be? Maybe Todoro-

“Oh.” Izuku was sure that his face was as red as a tomato by now, so he hid behind his hands. “This is so embarrassing, Y/N, please forgive me!” he squealed as you laughed

“We were planning a surprise party for you but now that I’ve spoiled the surprise, can you at least act surprised on your birthday?”

Izuku nodded frantically

“This is so embarrassing; I was so worried!”

He heard your soft laugh again. “It’s cute that you were jealous, though.”

#izuku midoriya x reader #deku x reader #midoriya x reader #izuku x reader #deku x male reader #izuku midoriya x male reader #izuku #deku #izuku midoriya #midoriya izuku #x reader #x you #x yn #x male reader #x m!reader #bnha x male reader #bnha x reader

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sukiglycerin · 4 years

Text

yours, senpai || katsuki bakugou.

* pairing: pro-hero!katsuki bakugou x manager!reader (gender neutral!)

* genre: kind of,,, angsty not really, fluff

* words: 1,884

* warnings: all i can say is sorry shouto, usage of sEnpAi (used for upperclassmen) and kOuhAi (used for underclassmen), i keep doing manager!reader nd bakugou, reader has a bad day, cussing, bakugou being soft

* original request: okay so i’ve seen so many bakugou fics about him getting jealous but I remember having an idea to write about the reader getting jealous over bakugo for something so little because of them having a rough day i don’t really have the time to write it but if you get around to it and actually wanna write it i’d definitely give it a read

* a/n: this is finally here! i’m really happy with how it turned out. ngl, this was almost named “y/n and the terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day” but be glad i didn’t LKDSLFSL there will be a second part to this that’s just,,, pwp for fem!reader. so, look forward to that next week! @toishi is the best for proofreading this~~

bakugou always had girls over him. it was just a thing, a norm, that had come to be as a pro-hero. that didn't make you like it more, or anything, but you had to accept it. you knew it would never really change; even in your high school days, the kouhai named bakugou would be the talk of the girls in your year, fawning over his smooth skin and rugged look. (it was as though they'd completely forgotten the sports festival in your second year.) you never understood the appeal; to you, a third-year in the business course, bakugou was just an immature hero-wannabe, one of the boys that came a dime a dozen in japan. heck, this was a hero school; you were surrounded by them.

your first interaction with bakugou was in your third year. you'd been partnered up with a hero course student as a project, learning the ins and outs of marketing to a hero's strengths and managing said hero. girls absolutely ogled you for being partnered up with the bakugou, but you found it slightly revolting. to idolize a second year, a kouhai, who had anger issues and a terrible fashion sense? you did not see the appeal. if anything, you were concerned about how to contain the explosiveness of his personality and package it into a pretty looking present. his face constantly made the crudest of expressions, and the words that fell from his lips were completely vulgar.

after the project, your perspective of bakugou slightly changed; his face wasn't always unpleasant to look at (typically when he was off-guard) and his personality had softened a bit. he, at least, had the decency to call you senpai; according to a rumour from your friend, class 2a's infamous pretty boy, shouto todoroki, spoke quite plainly. too plainly. it was like he had a bone to pick with every upperclassman he talked to, not bothering to use the proper honorifics and talking shit when upset (the latter, though, wasn't confirmed by your friend, you'd just heard it around).

you kept in touch with bakugou, and the honorifics never really dropped, even though you'd told him it was fine to speak casually. you'd both graduated from high school, thus bakugou became a pro-hero and you started an office job at a hero agency. you worked your way up through the company, though it was an incredibly slow process due to the sheer size of it. it was then bakugou offered you a position at his agency; as his manager.

manager was a heavy word in your mouth. the only times you'd even echoed the job were your school project with bakugou and the one time you'd handed a schedule to a sidekick during one of your internships. besides, you didn't want to earn the job simply because you had the right connection; you wanted to earn it, and as of then, you didn't quite feel you had. when you'd voiced this concerned to bakugou, he bluntly told you that he believed you were fit. (your first reaction was: what kind of reasoning is that?) he then followed up that he was in desperate need of a competent manager, and that if you could do one day he'd be grateful and pay however much you asked. it was a surprising request from such a popular, in-demand hero, but you supposed it wouldn't hurt.

it has not hurt at all in the five years you've been his manager. the closest thing that has come to hurting would be the fangirls, and even then, most mean no harm. somewhere in the middle you'd started dating bakugou, and it was almost as if you were dating his fangirls as well, with the way they always tried to contact you or hammered you if they recognized you in public. thankfully, the latter was extremely rare.

however, today was not a particularly good day for the appearance of fangirls. whatever power in the universe had decided to awaken you on the wrong side of bed (literally, you found yourself face-to-face with a spider and two alarms too late), and now you were blessed with a meet-and-greet for bakugou.

fanmeets were held once in a blue moon for bakugou (thankfully), because he was more concerned about his hero duties than how his fanservice would make some girl's heart burst out of her chest. lucky for you, the universe blessed you to have one today.

really, the only thing you can think of as you drive to work is the sight of bakugou's face. he's always quite cute in the mornings; the rasp of sleep on his tongue and a slight pout he has when talking. it would be enough to reenergize you for the day, you know for sure.

conveniently, he is nowhere near his office when you arrive to work. you pull out the calendar on your phone and realize: he's currently being styled for his fanmeet, and you definitely won't be seeing him for another hour. you sigh, heading to the lounge to make yourself coffee. this was gonna be a long day.

conveniently, you burn your hand in the slightest making your coffee, and it seems to have started a time bomb of your patience. careful not to burn your tongue on the godforsaken coffee, it gets cold. you're stuck in an elevator with a bunch of stockholders who do not smell pleasant (a potpourri of conflicting fragrances is not ideal), and somehow, you almost trip up walking while fuming about the horribleness of your day.

conveniently, you forget where you put the paper copy of today's schedule and must begrudgingly adhere to the plain, unannotated one on your phone. the hold time for the fanmeet venue takes far too long for a priority customer (such as yourself and ground zero), and listening to eine kleine nachtmusik for the billionth time as the same monotone voice apologizes for the wait does nothing to brighten your day. damnit, mozart, it's morning, and you have 8 more hours of this shit. thankfully, the venue has not completely forgotten about your existence and you're able to confirm everything, and then you find yourself driving to said venue to meet up with staff. traffic is one hell of a nightmare to someone having a bad day.

you sit in your car, which seems extremely cramped and humid because you've been sitting in it for too long, clicking on and off radio channels to the point you make a rhythm based off the clicks and somehow your radio hasn't broken and traffic hasn't moved an inch.

you arrive at the venue on time with no bakugou in sight; ah, right, he's retouching his makeup and hair. he doesn't even need makeup, in your humble opinion; his natural skin is literally glowing. you're just about to approach bakugou (who, maybe on second thought, needs the makeup, considering how angelic he looks) when one of the staff asks that you check that the projector is on the right channel, and then the fans pour in. you try to convince yourself that each fan has spent an abhorral amount of money to get into this event and that you should treat them with respect, but it's so damn hard when they're all nosebleeding and making grabby hands at bakugou. you're grateful you're not a bodyguard, or you're sure you would've decked the teen with the green shirt who attempted to full-on makeout with bakugou before being politely escorted out.

you could barf at the fanservice so gracefully sown into the fanmeet; the way bakugou so effortlessly intertwines with a fan's, or how he ends a smooth line with a heart-killing smirk. it's absolutely disgusting recalling that you taught him all of that.

needless to say, you have a lot of pent-up frustration by end of the day. the fanmeet ended smoothly, though halfway in, you considered ditching your position as manager to become a nosebleeding, crying, grabby-handed fan just to make contact with bakugou. perhaps the last straw for you was after the fanmeet; as the two of you exited the venue, tired, a fan (probably around bakugou's age) approached bakugou for a picture. bakugou accepted, and she apologized profusely for bothering the two of you. you were stuck behind the camera, grumpily watching as she put her hands on bakugou. a rational part of your brain knew her touches were as polite as possible, but the rest of your brain selectively ignored this fact. you fumed taking the photo, gritting out a smile as you handed back the fan's phone (stopping yourself from smashing it on the pavement). who were these fans, taking away you from bakugou?

"senpai," bakugou deadpans as the two of you drive home. the word brings a sense of comfort to you; strange to an outside viewer, you know, but it somewhat acts as a pet name bakugou used on you. the word brings you back to simpler times, when you and bakugou were clear-cut senpai and kouhai, nothing else. even when you became his manager, the word "senpai" rolled so smoothly off his tongue, despite the roles being switched. you started having a penchant for the word, it becoming a word of comfort to you. for you, entangled in a strange manager/lover position to bakugou. senpai. it reminds you of who bakugou was, and how much he means to you now.

"eh? what's wrong? you've been lookin' upset all day," bakugou grunts.

"it's... trivial," you say. you rarely get jealous; you trust bakugou, and know he'd only ever have eyes for you. "let's talk about it when we get home." you make up your mind to discuss it rationally with bakugou when you get home. very rationally, with cuddles and all.

one thing that fans will never ever get are bakugou's cuddles, and you smile to yourself at that. they'll never know what it feels like to feel safe in bakugou's arms, to be enveloped in his scent, to feel home with bakugou, and be able to call him only yours. in that way, he's your little secret.

when bakugou asks what's wrong at home, you simply reply, "missed you." the two words are enough; he's stepping towards you, a little hesitant, and then his arms are around you, and the familiar scent of caramel greets you.

"had a bad day," you confess, "and watching all the fans and the fanservice..."

"fuck the fanservice," bakugou says, and his grip gets slightly tighter. "i'd leave it all for you, in a heartbeat. i'm... i'm only yours." you look at him, and he's looking away, face scrunched in a frustrated expression and cheeks dusted pink.

"you should know that, idiot," he grumbles.

you smile. "love you," you say, pecking his cheek softly. he flushes deeper at this, glancing at you then away again.

"don't make me say it back," he mumbles. "you know i love you too."

it's at night when the feelings of jealousy bubble again. you can't help but feel insecure, replaying the day's events in your mind. those girls had so much that you didn't - surely, they were much more attractive, much more sweet and kind.

"mine," you mumble, pressing yourself against bakugou.

"stop thinking, moron, and sleep," bakugou grunts. "of course i'm all yours."

#bakugou x reader #bakugou katsuki #bakugou angst #bakugou fluff #bnha x reader #bnha imagines #bnha scenario #bnha headcanon #bnha bakugou #bakugou headcanon #bakugou scenario #bakugou imagine #katsuki x reader #bnha fluff #bnha oneshots #luna's writing #*lunarequests

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crazys-art · 2 years

Text

the evolution of my oldest oc's design for today's mARTch (day 24 old & new)

(more about specifics under the read more)

ahhh, izzy, my favorite thing to torture. watch as the life drains from her eyes as i realize just how angsty i can make immortality!

she's had the same basics over the years: long brown messy hair, green eyes, baggy blue jeans, green shirt/hoodie, then in the second design i added her face scar, red scarf/kerchief, and boots, and really it's just been those with slight changes. personality wise though... oh boy.

originally, izzy was a character i made for an adventure time roleplay. it was a bunch of people on the official cartoon network adventure time forums roleplaying characters surviving in the aftermath of the great mushroom war, which, well, sort of inspired the direction her story would go on to have.

she was a 900 year old witch who looked 9 because... well, i was nine when i made her and she was very obviously a self insert but the ~lore~ reason i made up was that witches aged 100 times slower than humans. she was basically just a kid who was a witch. i had tried to be mysterious about her- making it a secret that she wasn't human, but i just. immediately had her say she was a witch because i couldn't take waiting that long.

then i learned what daggers were and thought they were so cool that everything changed /hj

surprisingly enough, this overly edgy version was my way of trying to make her not cringey. i didn't want to make a mary sue or anything so i leaned into that "strong female character means they're physically really strong" trope as if that was better lmao. also surprisingly enough even with that anime-ass haircut i still hadn't watched any anime yet at that point.

this is also when i started making the longer lifespan thing have a bit more weight to it. i. honestly didn't put that much thought into it so a lot of it was just generic like "people think immortality is a gift,, but it is really,, A Curse" stuff

then she had this third design, which is the one she's had for the longest amount of time. well, it did change sometimes, but the changes were all things that are hidden by her clothes, mostly various scars/amputations. at the beginning of this phase she was still that edgy generic "immortality bad" thing but this time she was actually immortal! at this point i figured out how/why she stopped aging & couldn't be killed and boy is there so much fun angst to play with there

during that design she's had some outlooks such as "hating everything" or "being extremely sad a lot" or "being a lot smarter than everyone else" etc etc. but then she got closer and closer to her current personality, which is: tired mom friend. i could go more into detail on that but it's also funny to just leave it there.

and yeah, newest design, all that's really changed is that i'm showing off her prosthetic leg that she got halfway through the last design but remained covered by her clothes. plus her resting face has gone from "angry" to "vacant" so that's fun :D

#oc: izzy #crazy's art #crazy's ocs #martch #martch2022 #csp

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crqstalite · 3 years

Text

Letters Home.

I made a mistake because this was originally meant to answer a prompt fill and then I forgot about it until now. So I tweaked it, but it still works I think.

I would rather not think about the fact the current majority of writing I've done for Lali and Joker is very angsty. That'll change, eventually, but it was begging to be written so here we are. It's a little shaky since I've written Joker himself maybe a grand total of three times but I'm happy enough with it.

Post-Thessia, minor (major?) character death mentioned. Lali/Joker.

"There's a new Blasto movie coming out, it doesn't look a lot better than the last one, but it'd be great to see with you when you're home again."

Her green eyes are still bright, her grin wide while she falls back on the collection of pillows decorating her bed. Her concerns then must've extended about as far as what was for dinner that evening, or tomorrow's assignment. Blasto wasn't one of her favorites, he knew that every time they'd watched one together, but she'd sat through every single one because it made him happy. Not that she didn't complain the entire time though.

It'd been a while since he'd been fifteen himself, but those concerns shouldn't have included Reapers in them.

"You must know about all the inaccuracies in the movies, huh? With the Council and stuff this has to be hilarious to you."

Joker isn't sure what feeling to name the one that's threatening to consume him while Hilary continues talking, rattling off that week's events. Teachers, classmates, her chores around the house.

The vidmail just seemed so normal. Everything had seemed perfectly fine when he'd checked in on them after they'd left Earth. Maybe that was an overstatement, nothing would've been fine but it was still manageable then. His father and his younger sister had intended to bunker down for as long as they had to, as long as they could while he'd promised them to try and get them off Tiptree. Nothing had seemed off. Nothing had seemed wrong. He thought they'd have time.

Six months later and he'd proved himself wrong. Time was in shorter and shorter supply. By the time he could turn his attention fully back to finding them nearly a week ago to do anything more about their situation, it'd been too late. He'd heard it over the extranet, part the long list of colony worlds flashing red every other hour. His blood had run cold while he'd hoped, prayed he wouldn't find his homeworld among the lost.

The galaxy felt like it stopped spinning when he did. In big, bright red letters, it'd said Tiptree, and he...it'd all felt like a bad dream then. That he'd look back and see it was some other colony out in the Traverse. Not his. It couldn't. It shouldn't have. It was so far outside of normal trade routes that it didn't make sense for the Reapers to seize it.

Yet they'd done so anyway. The last communications had gone out the day prior, and had stretched into silence since then. Where he'd be expecting a call today, instead his missed messages have remained dark. His 'tool won't connect to his father's, or Hilary's.

He almost misses when the door behind him opens, his hand missing the pause button on the video while he scrambles for it. He doesn't get a great glance over his shoulder, but it's enough for him to try and get his emotions back in check long enough to hold a conversation, "Shepard? Look, I'm sorry for what I said earlier."

"You've got the wrong Shepard, actually. I think." If the voice isn't enough to convince him, then the absence of anger in it does when he turns his chair to look at her. Smaller, softer, more concerned when Citlali pauses in the doorway compared to her elder sister. His girlfriend a sight for sore eyes, at least compared to her counterpart, "Sorry for scaring you, if I did.

"You didn't. Just, thought she was making the rounds again. And holding a grudge against your commander doesn't really bode well for you, as I've found." He can't find the energy to add a genuine laugh with the quip, and while Citlali smiles, it's one of the ones that's strained, "What? I feel like Alenko's walking proof of that."

"I guess, depending on how you look at it." She furrows her brow, maybe in thought, maybe in disbelief. He still can't read her very well, though it's not as if she makes it easy. Shaking off the expression, "Do you mind if I come in? You seemed...busy."

While Hilary's vid has gone quiet, he doesn't meet her eyes. The distraction might be better than nothing, even though he'd rather spend his time alone, most likely watching the last handful of mails from the month prior, "If you want to, sure. Did you need anything?"

"No. It's just...quiet around here. Thessia's on everyone's mind and it honestly feels too constricting." The door closes behind her, "If you're worried, Kodelyn's with Liara right now. I don't think she's going to come back up here for a while."

"Oh good. That'll probably give her time to cool off." Refocus her frustration with Thessia back towards comforting, always seemed like it fixed something in her. He might've been out of line, but he hadn't been expecting for her to explode at him like that. It seemed too out of character, and he hadn't been able to accurately predict it. The longer she spent doing anything else was probably extending his lifespan. Shepard wasn't predictable, but she rarely played the stereotype of the short-fuse Commander.

"Cool off?" Citlali quirks an eyebrow, "Was she mad at...you?"

"Surprising, I know."

"Weird. What'd you do?"

"Nothing." He says habitually, then sighs, "I don't know. Rough day for obvious reasons, she wasn't doing so well and I probably didn't make it any better."

"Oh." Citlali cringes, "She wasn't too upset with you, was she?"

"Probably not with me specifically. I just ended up as collateral damage."

"Collateral -- Never mind. She'll probably apologize when she's feeling more like herself. If she ever does." Her tone wavers at that, uncertainty on the other end of it, "Are you okay, though?"

His silence answers it for her. What does he say to that? Fine, only that I found out my home might be ashes and the only family I have left might be gone?

Well, he probably could.

"Sure. Fine."

Her smile's shaky, "Are you really fine, or are you just trying to get rid of me?"

"Never, I love spending time with you. You know that."

"Uh-huh. I'll suspend my disbelief, but only because you're sweet," She frowns at that, padding over to sit in the empty co-pilot's chair, turning it to face him, "If you don't want to talk about it, that's fine. You don't have to lie to me though."

"I'm not. Just dealing with...everything. All of us have our off days." The screen blinks when he turns back to it, Hilary's expression still frozen in one of amusement. His chest grows heavy again, this one was dated a day before the Reapers came through. This vidmail, the one like so many others that'd come before it, was one of the last ones he'd ever have of her.

And when he received it, he hadn't thought anything of it. He wouldn't go as far as to say he'd taken the ritual for granted, but he'd thought he'd receive another one. And another after that. He was careful to watch every one, and send back another as soon as he was able. His had gone unread.

"Fair enough." Citlali leans back, blissfully oblivious, "Long day. Maybe way too many things happened all at once."

"You could probably say that again."

"I'll refrain from repeating myself." She chuckles, "Can't wait to get back to the Citadel. The rest this crew needs is probably ticking up towards absurd."

"That bad in your professional opinion?" He asks, "I'd thought we were doing just peachy. Y'know, with the Council trying to absolve themselves of guilt and the galaxy crumbling around us."

"Thank God for night clubs." She responds, leaning back, "It just feels tenser than ever. Can't shake the feeling we're getting towards the end of whatever this is, and it's making everyone jumpy."

"Probably, yeah. Hopefully it'll be longer than a day or two when Shepard's done with Horizon. It'd be nice not running from Reaper forces day in and day out."

"Too exciting for you?"

"Everyone has their limits. just seems like there are more of them than ever lately, and they all want a piece of us." That much is true. The other half is that he wants a chance to search. Search the Citadel, search the surrounding systems. Maybe Hilary would be with the refugees, and he just hadn't found her yet. Maybe she'd lost her 'tool. They'd never been great at remembering each other's codes.

One hell of a time to forget, if she was out there, all alone and surrounded by the unknown.

Citlali turns her gaze towards the front window, then to one of the screens in front of him from what she can see, "Thessia-related matters aside, if you're willing to share, who's that?"

He hesitates, trying to find an answer while his throat tightens around his words. All he can do is send a picture of Hilary over to her screen. She halfway smiles when she receives it, one of her out in the yard during his last leave. Yellow sundress, celebrating the first day of summer, "Friend? Family? She looks just like you. Same grin and everything."

"Family. Younger sister, actually."

"Aw. Looks just like you." Citlali smiles, "What's she like?"

"Like any little sister, I guess." What was there to say? Why is he looking for adjectives to encapsulate the sister he loved, and why is it so difficult, "Smart, kind, practical joker sometimes. Occasionally gets on your nerves, but you love her too much to stay mad."

"As all siblings do. Feel like she'd be fun to have around. Guess you missed out on the curly hair gene, huh?"

"Had it when I was younger."

"Is she looking to follow in your footsteps? A pilot just like her brother?"

The lump in his throat almost doesn't let him answer her, and he plays with the bill of his hat, "Maybe. I don't think she ever really said anything about it."

"Big shoes to fill, I get it." The smile fades slightly when he doesn't follow up on it, "Where is she now?"

His voice is raspy when he tries to talk again, "I don't...really know. I don't know if she even still is."

Her face falls, furrowing her brows once she realizes, "I- Jeff..."

"Evac orders were sent out to Tiptree a couple of days ago. No news since, only that a handful made it...somewhere. Liara didn't say where." The orange lights in front of him start to swim in the water collecting in the corners of his eyes, "I don't even know if she made it offworld."

There's a flood threatening to burst behind his eyes, delicately held back for the last few days just by sheer will. Just the thought of the planet being turned into Earth, Palaven, Tuchanka...hell even what he saw of Thessia turns his stomach.

They didn't live that close to any major city, but they still would've been at risk if they sent any husks out that way. Any of the other grotesque monsters they'd seen lately.

Had she been looking for him? When it'd all happened, had he missed her call while they were in FTL? Just by a split second.

The thought of one them getting their hands on her, one of the sweetest girls in the galaxy who'd done nothing but act as a ray of sunshine in his life, it kills him to think about.

His hands are wet, he doesn't even realize until he hears Citlali's boots against the ground behind him. Her eyes are searching his face when she kneels down next to his chair, holding out her arms halfway in a silent question.

He accepts a moment later, wrapping his arms around her. She hugs him back, a quiet whisper on her lips when she returns the gesture, "I'm so sorry."

The dam breaks.

Big jade eyes that match his, a grin she lamented about every other day. The figurine he'd brought back for her, the Normandy, on her nightstand just in view.

What he'd give to see her again. Hear her voice again.

The galaxy crumbles away, tears streaming down his face.

"I love you, Jeff. I miss you."

#joker #lali/joker #oc #original character #veloker #jeff moreau

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smolbeandrabbles · 3 years

Text

When The Wine Wears Off - Nolan Sorrento x Reader (Ready Player One)

‘Direct’ Sequel to Sugar... I might have skipped a scene or two

@wltz-bby @happyskywhale

Author’s Note: Oh my gosh, okay. Okay. The thing I’m most worried about... and why it’s taken me more than a year after finishing it to post it is that it detracts from Sugar. I don’t want it to do that. But I also talked to my girl, my partner in crime ms. @mandy23b extensively about this and we came to the conclusion that I should post it. Sugar is the 4th most popular fic on my blog. And every time I get a note on it I get a shot of serotonin. I know how much it means to you. I would like to tell you, have no fear, there’s a third part.

@alotofrandomfangirling - as you are the original brain behind Sugar, I just wanted to personally thank you (again!) for all the joy Sugar has brought to me and others 💕

Disclaimer: RPO & associated characters nothing to do with me / I literally cannot not make everything I do have some kind of angsty twist to it and really someone should stop me / gifs not mine / lyrics not mine / completely tonally different from its predecessor.

Premise: You know the exact 3 word phrase that Nolan Sorrento wants to hear, but saying it will end up more trouble than it’s worth...

Words: 5013

Warnings: Angst/hurt / swearing / a massive misunderstanding & twisted viewpoint. / sexual connotations

______ The keys are still hanging in the front door You're hanging all over me And in between kisses I hear you whisper something 'bout loving me There's a half a glass sitting on the table The other half spilled on the bed I'm halfway believing you're really meaning Every sweet word you just said Or is it just that bottle of red When the wine wears off And the buzz is gone When the room starts spinning around and 'round Will you still be holding on Have we lost our minds Or is your kiss that strong Tell me will you still be mine Baby when the wine wears off When I wake up in the morning Will you be in my arms When the sun starts shining through those blinds Will you mean what you said in the dark Or will I have a headache and a broken heart I don't want you to stop kissing me now Keep on loving me laying me down I close my eyes and hide from these doubts Do my best to not worry about When the wine wears off ---

Nolan grabbed another bottle - one you were too busy kissing him to find out the year or place of - and carried you from his office. That tub of ice-cream was long finished, but you were still feeling the after affects; he was careful down the stairs and out onto IOI plaza. You'd both hastily re-dressed - but also knew there was no way that you were making it back to his apartment. Luckily, Nolan had his own (barely used one) on the plaza that offered the same kind of comfort. Hell; would it have mattered as long as it had a bed?

He pushed you up against the glass of the elevator, your legs around his waist and you sighing his name - it slowed for the floor both too quick and not quick enough. You already knew a multitude of bruises would be present along your neck and shoulders tomorrow. Nolan was only too content to add to them.

You reached his apartment and he finally put you down; but you were already loosening his tie again - Nolan chuckled, recapturing your lips, and pulled you into the kitchen. Setting the bottle down he collected two glasses, and poured as you teased his neck yourself - sliding your hands under his shirt as you undid the buttons; leading to you raking your nails across his skin. You liked the groan that rose in his chest to match the shiver that ran through him and into you at your close contact. You were sure you’d be drawing plenty of those from him before the night was through…

The wine was just as good, if not better than his 1999 bottle. But this one was clearly not designed to be drunk as slow. Or he simply didn't care; Nolan had downed the glass and was pouring another by the time you reached the bedroom, and you had a distinct feeling that it was the after effects of the first bottle calling the shots here. You were determined to keep up with his glasses though; so maybe it was all going to your head too fast... Dragging him down onto the bed you relieved him of his clothing far quicker than you had in his office - and soon enough you were one again. (This time ice cream not included.)

This was heaven and, with your hands in Nolan’s hair and him sighing your name just as often as you were moaning his, you knew you were exactly where you wanted to be. Probably for the rest of your life. And you had to tell him that... Kissing him you had to tell him that. NOW. Right now. No other time would possibly be more perfect. And you sighed it, about as romantic and blissful as you thought you could get, and every word the truth: "Nolan, I love you...”

He almost snapped out of it right then, almost a little confused. Nolan’s heart began to race but he swallowed hard to keep that feeling at bay. You were just saying what he wanted to hear... That was all, nothing more to it than that... But you'd never said it before. He didn't ask you to. Because that wasn't the relationship you shared. You were tipsy, hell, maybe you were completely drunk by now. But... I love you? There was no way you were saying that and meaning it. It just felt right to say it in that moment, he got that. He felt that too. But he fought the elation that made him feel - after all, how could a girl like you possibly love a man like him?

***

When Nolan awoke he had a pounding headache, and cursed himself. He knew he'd wasted a pretty good bottle of wine; and half of it was probably spilled around this apartment...

He rubbed his eyes, aware you were still there tangled up with him. Nolan turned with a gentle smile, you were good to him, and exactly what he wanted and needed when he needed it. You'd come into his life at a good time... Maybe the perfect time... He tucked stray locks of hair behind your ear to frame your face. And that made him smile even more. You stirred momentarily, mumbling something in your sleep, but didn't wake. Which was probably good, considering you'd have as much of a splitting headache as he did.

Nolan slipped from your embrace and crossed to the closet. He supposed that the board might call him in for a meeting today about Parzival and the big scoreboard... He cursed under his breath; this would all still work out. He had to believe that it would. He selected his suit, tie and shirt - dressing quickly he left you to wake up naturally, and decided the only thing for his headache was about as many aspirin as he thought he could handle! Nolan waited up for you, but as he did bits and pieces of the night previous flashed in his head, and that ‘confession’ of yours came around, and around, and around again… And he couldn’t shake it, or suppress it, no matter how much he tried.

His bedroom door closed, and you were already dressed and ready for the day, another flatteringly short black dress. Nolan smirked at that, shaking his head before turning back to his computer as he caught up on all the latest business news. “Morning…” But you still had that sweet as sugar voice. And ‘I Love You’ resounded in his head once more. “Morning.” His reply was almost too short, and his glance to you was wary. “…Are you okay?” “Yes.” Again – Nolan was playing too short. And you thought he knew it as much as you did. “Are you sure?” You took a step forward, unsure yourself. “Uh…” He looked around his apartment, anywhere but at you, and he took several deep breaths; most of which evoked sighs “Uh, I…” Nolan realised he might have to ask you about it, because you were getting close and closer and he couldn’t not answer you now. “Y/N… L-Last night you…” You weren’t sure where this was going to go, and part of you flushed because there wasn’t a lot you remembered, was he about to tell you something really embarrassing?! “…You told me… that you loved me.”

You stopped your walk, opening your mouth without a sound. Did you? Maybe that was accidental… but you couldn’t deny that was how you felt. But why did Nolan look so nervous about it? Did he think it wasn’t the truth? Was he worried it wasn’t the truth? “If I did, I meant it.” His face scrunched for a moment in confusion, like he wasn’t sure he’d heard you, “What?” but there was something seriously wrong with the tone of his voice, and the clarity that rose in his eyes – that you didn’t notice until it was too late. “I do, I love you.” You only wanted to give him assurance. To turn that confused frown into a smile, to make Nolan feel like you knew he wanted to feel. That man was starved of touch and love… And you were quite prepared to stand here and admit that you could step up and give him both.

It was a fatal mistake. “Don’t.” “Nolan… Wh…” “Stop it!” That confusion across his face was quickly turning to anger. “Why? Don’t you want me to… didn’t you hear what I…? I love you-!” You didn’t understand, why would he act like this over something he wanted so bad? He grabbed your wrist, and it was tight and painful, making you gasp. "N-Nolan-!" "Shut up! SHUT UP! I told you to shut up!!" You didn't think you'd ever seen him so mad, and that look in his eyes made you scared. "But I..." Your voice was meek against his tirade, "Nolan I lo-" "STOP IT! STOP-! DON'T YOU DARE SAY IT AGAIN!!" Apparently, that vice grip could get tighter, and when he was satisfied that you weren't about to open your mouth again, he yanked you out of the apartment. Nolan didn't once let you go, nor look at you, or talk to you. And you were on the verge of tears.

So this was the truth; that you would be just like everyone else. That you would tell him something like that to mock him in the cruellest way. Nolan might have been used to this, but it didn’t mean it didn’t hurt any less when it happened. But he wouldn’t have thought that you would be one of them; taking advantage of the fact that Nolan wanted to hear it more than anything. That you would make him believe it – just to make him weak and vulnerable, so he would say ‘I love you’ back heart bleeding just for you to flash a smirk, and laugh, and say ‘I’m joking. Who could love you?’. Well this time he wasn’t about to stand for it. Everything he loved always left. Nolan was beginning to think it wasn’t even worth considering, let alone waiting for. That he would every truly be loved by anyone. His behaviour right now was a trigger response, something he found uncontrollable because he was so afraid of those closest to him leaving. What it created in Nolan was a person angry and volatile, violent, unforgiving. A heartless man.

***

You entered the IOI HQ and his walking pace picked up. "Nolan-!" You tried again, hoping the panic was present in your voice and would let him know how scared you were, "Nolan-! Please-!" To no avail, he just kept dragging you.

Your eyes widened when you realised what floor he was taking you to. LOYALTY. Now you were desperate; you would do anything to fix this. You would do anything to fix it anyway - maybe you'd said it too soon. Maybe he didn't feel the same - and didn't want to feel the same. But to you that was okay. You could go back to what it was - why couldn't he let you apologise and go back?! "Nolan, I'm sorry---!!!" Your wail and pull against his grip didn't even make him turn around. He stopped, finally, outside a room and pushed the door open. "In here." "Nolan... I'm sorry... Let me fix this... Baby, I-" "DON'T." He raised his voice again, and like yours was shaking in panic, his was shaking in anger. "Don't make me say it again." He turned those horrifyingly cold blue eyes on you, "And I'm not your baby."

You stepped into a grey room, with tables and chairs - and a single window looking out onto the loyalty centre blocks. He slammed the door behind you and disappeared. You bit your lip and tried to take a deep breath; nothing helped as you rubbed your wrist - now red, and indented with his fingers. The tears started running. You couldn't go back here... Surely he wouldn't make you go back to loyalty over this? It was three little words. It didn't even have to mean anything no matter how serious you were about it. Nolan wasn't taking it well, and maybe he needed a minute to calm down... Maybe he just needed a minute... And you could talk it out, he could tell you there was no love between you and there never would be love between you. And that was fine with you, if that's what he wanted. If you got to be close to him that would have to do. You sat, body shaking, and covered your face with your hands.

Nolan please... Anywhere but loyalty again...

F'Nale almost looked at him in disbelief. "No." "No-!? Why not- I cannot go back in there-!" She folded her arms; "You made your bed Nolan, you can go lie in it now. I didn't drag her down to loyalty. I'm damn well not putting her back in the box." She jabbed her finger at him, "If you want her back in the loyalty centre, put her there yourself." "I can't." He looked away from her momentarily and bit his lip. "Then get her out!" F'Nale almost couldn't see the problem here, and she also kinda liked you. You seemed to do good things for Nolan that put him in a good mood - which made him so much easier to deal with. But, no, apparently now he wanted to be an idiot. Though she wasn't exactly sure what about, and wasn't about to ask at the way he was being so vague about it. He gave her a dark look. That was a no too.

She sighed, exasperated: "Nolan. You cannot keep her in holding. Either get her out, or put her back in loyalty. But if you put her in loyalty - you're dragging her to that box yourself and turning the system on. I'm having nothing to do with this. Last time I arrested her and put here in there YOU were the one that got her out!" "I know." He gritted his teeth, "And I shouldn't have." Oh. F'Nale hoped her face was stoic enough. This wasn't good.

When he returned and opened the door you had stopped crying. Nolan stepped back from the door, "Ms. L/N, please step out." "Nolan-" "Come with me." Even now he wouldn't look at you, or let you finish any sentences. But you were determined to show him you would do exactly as he said; nothing less. Damn her! He could tell as his eyes flicked to your face that you'd been crying. And that sent a shot of pain straight to his heart that he couldn't ignore.

‘Nolan, use your head. She's lying to you. A girl like that would never love a man like you. She's telling you things to get something from you. Who is she working for, who does she see and contact when you aren't around...? Remember what she's here for in the first place. And you know this is the right thing to do...’

He walked you down the rows of blocks, and you wondered where exactly he was taking you. You knew that the stairs at the end of the room would lead up a couple of floors to the War Room, and then his office, because you'd been escorted there by an employee when Nolan had given you his original proposal. Maybe he'd rather have this conversation there. That would make sense - it might be a screaming match of both of you trying to get your points across, even though you'd hope not. But he stopped suddenly, and turned to you. "Get in." You weren't sure he was serious at first, searching his face, with those hard grey-blue staring eyes. For once there was no getting passed that look."Nol-" He indicated to the tiny cell again. And you recognised the number immediately. It had been the one you'd been placed in originally. "No...NO, no, no, no!" His name became panic and refusal; "Nolan, please don't do this--!" "Don't make me pick you up and throw you in there, Y/N..." "Nolan what did I do-!? Please let me fix this...!" Why could he see how you felt about him? Why wouldn't he believe you? He was breaking your heart - couldn't he even see that?! "Begging won't save you now..." Nolan shook his head, and there was almost amusement to his voice. And you realised; he didn't believe a word you said. He thought that ‘I Love You’ was messing with him. That you couldn't possibly just say that for any reason other than wanting information that you might give to a clan... Maybe even this Parzival guy. Was that really what he thought of you?

But you were desperate: "Nolan, whatever you think of me, I swear I haven't done anything! I would NEVER do anything to hurt you... Nolan, please, I mean it... I-" He placed his hands either side of you, forcing you through the open door of the box, "Nolan, I love you." "Don't you DARE fucking say that lie again." He spat it. And you realise exactly what you'd done wrong. "Nolan-" "Don't even say my name again." "But, I-" He pushed you backwards, hard, and you tripped, slamming into the back of the glass structure hard. Ow-! Was about the last thing on your mind as the doors began to close on him. "NO!" You screamed it, running for the opening but all too late. "NOLAN PLEASE!!! PLEASE DON'T LEAVE ME HERE!!! NOLAN!!!" You slammed your hands against the glass, "Nolan! PLEASE!!!! I WANT TO FIX THIS!!! PLEASE!!!!" Anything but Loyalty. You knew what happened, people died here… And you knew your debts were about to increase tenfold.

Nolan Sorrento took one step at a time backwards, shaking his head. But he looked at you, he could hold your eyes. He could see how afraid you looked, how upset, how heart broken. And somehow all he could think was that you deserved it. He kept walking like this, when he could still see you hitting the glass but couldn't hear your voice... And eventually had to turn away. His heart was breaking too; but how else were you going to learn? The last thing you saw, even when you vision was blurry with your tears running, was his back as Nolan walked back up those stairs to his office. And you knew it was over.

You would be just another girl stuck in the system; and you'd never get to love Nolan again.

***

It felt like the easiest thing to calmly, coldly, walk away from you. He didn’t even feel the need to look back, and as he climbed those stairs out of loyalty and to his office, he was already planning to get rid of every trace of you from his apartment. It would take him no time at all and he would feel nothing. Nolan was done with you, and now you were back in loyalty, he’d more than just dealt with it.

It didn’t take long for his feelings to fine tune themselves and hit him full force – at first Nolan was incensed. Your lying to him had broken his heart, he could have had you with him forever had you not betrayed him in such a way. So anything he needed his loyalty workers to do that sounded hardest, he made sure went on your roster. And there was no shame in that. He wanted to make you pay. “Sounds hard?” “Probably, Sir…” Then he gave that spiteful nod that F’Nale was starting to hate seeing: “…Send it to 25-N.” He didn’t even use your name anymore. You were nothing but a number on a glass box to him now. She couldn’t say she cared all that much for you, besides improving Nolan’s mood - except now any mention of you did the exact opposite. But she had seen you, and she thought some of these more physical tasks would put way too much strain on your body. Nolan didn’t care; and F’Nale thought if she pointed it out, he’d only give you more. You were being physically exhausted, for emotionally breaking him. "Mr.Sorrento..." He pressed the button on his comlink; since that first Key things had gone from bad to worse. Parzival and his little gang of friends now had two Keys each. Nolan thought he had Wade Watts dealt with – but that plan had also obviously failed. And although the Sixers were getting keys themselves, it was still a high score system. They would have to crack that third clue quickly if he wanted any chance of taking over the OASIS... "What is it?" Nolan snapped; he had no time for this. "There's a problem down in loyalty." "Well, why isn't F'Nale reporting to me on it then-!?" "Well - she told me to contact you, Sir." "OH." Why!? "What is it?" "There's a medical emergency going on down here." "What kind of medical emergency?" With one of the people stuck down there? Why should he care? Come to think of it - why was he asking? He wasn't interested. "One of the women here has collapsed. She's unconscious but still breathing... We're administering care right now." He raised an eyebrow - why would F'Nale… "SHIT!" He yelled out loud, and panic hit him, "Which capsule!?" "25-N Sir..." Y/N-! "I'M ON MY WAY!"

*** He nigh on sprinted down to loyalty and took those stairs two at a time. Shit! Shit! Shit! Shit! Shit! What had he done-?! At what cost had he been so hateful? Even Nolan realised why he was running. It had haunted him for a while, but it was his decision, and he would own that decision. And he would keep you there to prove himself right. Still, that didn’t stop him from lying awake at night, or endlessly dreaming about your body wrapped around his… Awaking to hope this was all a bad dream and you would still be there. You never were. Nolan knew right then he was wrong, you never had any reason to lie to him. When he woke up like that all he wanted to tell you was that he felt the same about you too. But it wasn’t like you were out there living your life and he could call you up, and cry down the phone, and beg for you to come back because of how wrong he was. No. You were in Loyalty. And Nolan Sorrento had put you there himself – and now he’d damn well almost killed you…

But he knew, now more than anything, what he wanted. He wanted love, he always wanted love… but running faster than he probably had in his life, Nolan also knew this: he only wanted your love.

When he reached your block, you were crowded by a number of loyalty workers and Nolan’s own employees, including F’Nale and a medic. “MOVE!” He fought his way to you and everyone else stepped back. Those in Loyalty knowing better than to stick around whilst the CEO was in the room. You were breathing, barely conscious but Nolan didn’t care – and would ignore the medics protests to gather you in his arms. “Y/N?! Y/N, oh God… I’m sorry, Y/N…” “No…lan…?” Your brain was a little bit fuzzy and your vision blurry as you opened your eyes. Last thing you remembered you were in the OASIS, strength waning. And you weren’t anymore… Anyway, it couldn’t have been Sorrento, he never wanted to see you again and he’d put you here. But everything cleared, and you felt his familiar warmth and breathed him in. And then you were screaming at him. “YOU---! YOU FUCKING MONSTER!!!” You tore yourself from his arms, taking a few steps back, a little steadier on your feet than you expected considering your head was still spinning, “GET YOUR FUCKING HANDS OFF ME!” Nolan drew himself to height from his knees, in silence. Looking to F’Nale and the rest around you, he gave a signal for them to back off.

Whatever you were about to do, you both thought he deserved. So you went for him; nails at his face, fists to his arms and chest, as you screamed god-knows-what at him. “YOU BASTARD!! HOW FUCKING DARE YOU COME DOWN HERE!!! HOW FUCKING DARE YOU PRETEND THAT YOU FUCKING CARE ABOUT ME!!” Nolan took every blow you dealt him without much resistance. You weren’t exactly at full strength either; so both of you were also wishing that they hit harder. But you had enough power to scream at him like this. And those words echoed around the complex. And yes, Nolan though he deserved that too. “You better not think I’m gonna fucking THANK you for this! What, does rescuing me make you fucking feel better?! Asshole!” You spat, taking steps that he conceded. “At least you have the balls to look me in the fucking face…” And Nolan was; because he wanted to punish himself just as much – look at what exactly he had done to you, so that he could burn this into his mind forever. Just to show himself what a fucking idiot he was.

You backed away from him because he still hadn’t said a word, and you were just as furious with him for that. Because you wanted a screaming match – so you could watch him misstep all the way through it. “YOU BROKE MY FUCKING HEART, NOLAN SORRENTO. DO YOU EVEN FUCKING CARE?!” Then you snapped, “Don’t answer that, I know the answer. You’re here for your own selfish reasons. Wouldn’t let the girl you used to fuck die – huh?! Couldn’t have that linger on your conscience with all the shit I know you do in the name of this company!?” There was a slight flicker of emotion across his face, but he held firm on his silence. You wanted to break him. But even you weren’t sure you knew how you break a man who was already broken.

You shook your head, and felt your tears start to run; “…Do you even know how to love Nolan? Do you know how to feel!?” There was more emotion here, and his mouth opened, chest contracting. “Whoever hurt you did a damn good job…” You let your tears drip; you weren’t about to hide this from him. He’d made this. “…I don’t think you can know how to love – else you wouldn’t run from it. You would have just loved me back. How can someone who wants it so badly turn it away?” You took steps towards him again, “What kind of man are you!?”

It was the first time his eyes had lowered from yours. And still there was silence. Nolan didn’t know if he looked like he felt nothing, but it felt like his heart had been ripped from his chest. Numb and hollow and all his fault. His heart was broken too, and he’d done that to himself. ‘You have no one else to blame. How can you even stand to let yourself look at her…? Do you know what you’ve done? Do you REALISE what you’ve done, Nolan?’

That didn’t help either. Because you wanted him to look at you and see what he’d done. And you wanted words. No matter what he was going to tell you. If Nolan was going to pathetically apologise then fine; even though you’d laugh in his face about it. Those beautiful blue eyes raised to you again – you hated yourself for even thinking that - and suddenly he was once again stoic, his eyes just a little wider. You gave that silence 10 more seconds, to see if he would even attempt to say something pitiful. He didn’t.

You folded your arms, shaking your head at him and how unbelievable his whole attitude was; "Aren't you even going to say anything!?" Nolan Sorrento blinked, and swallowed thickly. He might as well be swallowing sand. Everything was ringing in his ears, and the silence was deafening. He felt void of everything save one emotion, and that look in your eyes. So he took that deep breath he should have taken before… "I love you too." The silence that hung over the room this time was much more awkward. Nolan wasn’t sure exactly what he expected from you, he knew you probably weren’t about to give him some kind of fairytale ending. To run those steps back to him, take him in your arms, kiss him and it all be forgiven – not after what he’d done to you, not after what you’d just screamed at him. But you didn’t give Nolan an emotional response at all. Your face wasn’t even shocked to hear it, there was simply nothing there. But the silence kept hanging, and he almost wanted to ask you the same thing – to beg you for a response. How could he? Nolan knew he had no right.

Instead you took another step back, the shake of your head steady and slow. You might have still pitied him, even if you hated him right now. But you couldn’t give him what he sought. “That’s just, way too little way too late, Nolan.” You swallowed, “That isn’t an apology. That’s almost worse than an apology.” Was he thinking you’d just accept his love now? That any of his actions - from your confession of how much he really meant to you to this one - showed any act of love from him whatsoever. Quite the opposite; a quest to make you pay for your ‘trickery’. Your eyes flashed as they hardened; “I know this is wishful thinking, but GOD I hope I never have to see your face again!” You shook your head once more, he had to know. Nolan had to know he couldn’t do this to people. That even the all-powerful CEO of IOI couldn��t make people bounce back. The only way Nolan would ever learn was if you walked away – and you prayed whoever the next girl was, that he treated her better.

You began walking, knowing exactly where the exit was; time to test his mettle. Test that ‘love’ he apparently felt. There was a murmur from the onlookers and security began moving to stop you, to haul you back to your little pod. Nolan was still watching you in silence, numb… heart broken. Deservedly so. But he stopped them, hand out. “Let her go.” “Sir!?!” “Just…” Nolan held, realising how much he was struggling to breathe. Lump caught in his throat. Maybe he’d cry; in fact he probably should. “…let her go.” And so he watched you leave, he didn’t know where you would go, or who you’d go to, but he knew they deserved you a damn sight more than he did – he watched you walk out of his life. And as he did Nolan Sorrento really wished that he couldn’t feel a damn thing.

---

Thank you for reading. I’m as sorry as I am thankful-! 😬🙈

#There will never be enough Nolan Sorrento on my blog #Nolan Sorrento #Ready Player One #Ben Mendelsohn #Nolan Sorrento x Reader #Linzi Writes #smol bean drabbles #199!#Oh my god I have SOOOO many damn words to edit this week that I'm happy this wasn't that heavy...#I hope you're all thoroughly prepared for fic 200 #I'm not that's a lot of freakin words to edit-!#This has /such/ Control vibes...#AH but I stayed true to her and she didn't laugh at the end. Which tbh I really LOVE. Like she just keeps proving him wrong #There's some DAMN good speeches on this one - I'm not gonna like that I'm proud of this-!#it's just very angsty #Hoping that the Sugar reblog gets it more love...#Worried /still/ on what this one might do to it #Very much looking forward to the other sequel to Sugar that's being written #Take your time - please - but I'm so excited!#I wrote this (the majority of it) on the plane home from my holiday in October 2019. That's how long I've been holding it back from posting

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bangtan-madi · 4 years

Text

on the 6 a.m. train — kim taehyung

Pairing — Taehyung x Reader

Tags — best friend!Taehyung, older brother!Jimin, unrequited love, one-sided pining, a realistically happy ending, eventual friends to lovers

Genre — angst (like a shit-ton by my standards lol), fluff at the end

Word Count — 5.9k

Summary — An unrequited love is the most difficult to get over, especially when the healing process is interrupted by another's sudden revelation.

Warnings — language, mentions of infidelity

Soundtrack — Drown by Boy In Space

Request — @mytaetaey

A/N — Okay love, you wanted this to be super duper angsty so I hope you like it lol! I think this is the saddest thing I've written for BTS thus far, and I usually don't do angst so...fair warning I couldn’t help but write a happy ending lol. Now, if you'll excuse me, I intend to write fluff only for the next week. (Also this ended up being so much longer than I originally intended so sorry for the delay in finishing!)

There comes a moment in every person's life that they must decide whether or not the one they love is worth giving up their own happiness for. The line between the healthy amount of support and care that loved ones give each other is often convoluted, never easy to see, only ever clear in hindsight. Sometimes it takes time and distance away from that person for you to see whether or not this pain is worth it.

You desperately need that time. You crave that space. The past seven years, particular the last six months, have been full of secret longing and wholehearted adoration towards a certain person who never returned your feelings. It hurt you to see him look at you as his best friend's little sister, and it absolutely crushed you when he looked at another woman with desire.

The way he looked at her, you wanted that.

But no longer.

Gripping your suitcase tightly, you turn and step up the stairs, onto the platform of the train station. The sun is just rising over the cityscape, bringing a subtle hint of gold across the buildings. You will miss Seoul and all her beauty. The way the birds chirp at dawn, the way the city sings at night, the fact that all your best memories are here.

You shake your head and focus on the near future. Your home has been Seoul for the last seven years, but before that, it was Busan. And that coastal haven calls to you once more. Your birthplace and family are awaiting you at the end of this train ride, and that fact makes leaving a little easier. There are few things that your mother's kimchi and your childhood bed cannot fix.

In your pocket, your phone buzzes for the umpteenth time this morning. You looked at it the first few times the calls and texts came in but have ignored it ever since you saw the context.

Don't go, your friends begged. Please stay. He feels the same. He's an idiot for not seeing it. You don't have to go, [Y/n].

You hadn't told any of the members where you were going, when you were leaving, or if you were leaving at all. All they know is that you're gone from the dorms in the morning when you usually join them for breakfast, and all your most important belongings are gone. The only two people you've told of your choice are your mother, who has known of the whole situation or some time, and your boss at BigHit, who agreed to let you work remotely for a few weeks.

Nothing they say will change your decision, so you retrieve your phone from the pocket with the intent to turn it off. The screen illuminates once again, and you read the contact name.

Him.

And below his name, a message:

"I called your mother. She told me where you were going and where you are now."

You swallow hard at his words, and another text pops up.

"I'm coming to you. I've been an idiot. Please don't get on that train."

You look at the time of arrival on your ticket, then at the clock on your phone. The train is ten minutes out, as you arrived early, and you pray to god that it arrives before he does.

Your decision has been made; you are leaving Seoul, your friends, and the man you love unrequitedly behind.

To strengthen your resolve over the next few moments, your attention shifts to the events of the past six months, every single thing that has led to this decision.

"We love you, Army! See you next time!"

You could hear their voices from the stage. Even from behind the scenes, with the crew rushing about with the last seconds of the show, Namjoon's voice was crystal clear. It had been a long night of performing, and you were worried that they had overexerted themselves on their last stop of the tour. They were all beyond exhausted, and you knew Taehyung always pushed himself far over his limits. From backstage, you could tell him fading between their songs.

A few moments later, the lights turned off, and the music began to fade. The boys disappeared under the stage, out of sight of the Armys, and were instantly ambushed by staff. You struggled to get closer, desperate to make sure they were okay.

You spotted your brother Jimin first. He was covered in sweat and breathing hard, but otherwise he looked okay. Namjoon and Hoseok were in similar states. Seokjin and Yoongi seemed to be tired but overall doing okay. Jungkook looked exhausted and had oxygen placed at his nose and mouth, but his attention was on someone else.

Taehyung laid against the support beam of stage, his breathing erratic and eyes glazed over. He was in terrible shape, and all of the members' attention was on him.

Jungkook shoved the oxygen away from his face and asked it be given to Taehyung. When the youngest started to keel over, the staff member returned it to him with a promise to find another.

You grabbed a spare oxygen mask from the table behind you and pushed through the crowd, kneeling by Taehyung's slumped figure. With a gentle smile, you pressed the mask portion to his mouth. "Breathe in, Tae. Just breathe. You're a little low, is all."

Taehyung did as you ask, breathing shallow, unsteady breaths in tempo with yours. To assist in cooling him off, you shoved the thick jacket from his shoulders and down his arms. Yoongi saw what you were trying to do and jumped in to assist.

"He pushed himself way too hard for the last song," Jimin coughed.

"He always does that for his solo," Namjoon murmured.

Turning towards an employee behind you, you asked, "Can you get me a bottled water, please?"

The girl nodded and ran off, quickly returning with what you asked for. You thanked her quietly and once Taehyung had a handle on his breathing, you offered the beverage to him. "Can you drink?"

He nodded, coughing a bit as you pulled the oxygen away. As he scarfed down the water like a man who hasn't had a drink in days, you ran your fingers through his sweaty and unkempt hair. He always loved it when you did that, said that the gesture made him feel relaxed and peaceful. You did it whenever you could, even if he never saw it as anything more than platonic.

Seeing the red in his face fade as the water bottle emptied, you turned to the other members, all of which look equally exhausted and drained. "Go get changed and wash up," you stated with a soft smile. "He's gonna be okay."

"Are you sure?" Jungkook rasped worriedly.

You gave the maknae a reassuring expression. "I got him. Go. We'll catch up."

Seokjin gave you a knowing look, just as Hoseok flashed a sneaky wink before walking off with the others.

After the roar of the crowd and staff started to die down, it was just you and Taehyung for the next several minutes. Between the oxygen and the water, by the time the others had washed up and changed into traveling clothes, you were bringing him back to the land of the living.

When he blinked away the haze from his eyes, his gaze finally shifted to meet yours once again. You offered a smile as you brushed his unruly curls from his forehead. "Hey there, welcome back."

For the first time since the show ended, Taehyung smiled. "Hi."

"You okay? Do you need anything else?"

He shook his head slightly, pulling himself up into a proper seated position. "'M okay. Just a little light-headed. And hungry."

At the last comment, you laughed and ruffled the curls a bit. "You really scared everyone, Tae, including and especially me. Why do you always have to go so hard?"

The brunet offered a shrug and leaned into your touch. "Just wanted to give the Armys a good show. Especially for the last one, you know?"

"I do," you agreed, "but you have to take care of yourself, too, you big idiot." Your hand dropped reluctantly from his hair, resting instead on his forearm. "C'mon. Let's get you to the dressing room. One of the boys or staff can help you change and wash up if you need it. Can't wait too much longer. Our plane leaves in a half-hour for Seoul."

Taehyung gave a dreamy smile as you mentioned South Korea, a place none of you had been in months since tour began. "Mmm, that's right. We're going home." He allowed you to haul him to his feet, keeping a steady arm around his waist to help him carry his own weight. "You didn't have to stay with me like that. I'm sure it was scary. Another staff member could have done it."

You shook your head adamantly, gazing up at Taehyung. Even covered in sweat and over-exhausted, he looked stunning in the dim stage lighting. "I had to make sure you were okay. Someone's gotta take care of your stubborn ass."

The twenty-four-year-old gave scratchy laugh at your retort, coughing slightly halfway through. "What did I do to deserve such a great friend?"

In his compliment, your heart stung a little.

Friend. Of course. What else would you be?

The phone buzzes in your hand, bringing you out of a six-month-old memory. Taehyung's name flashes brilliantly on the surface, and in a moment of weakness, you answer.

"Please, don't hang up. I didn't think you'd actually answer, but now that you have...please just..."

"What do you want, Taehyung?" you ask, keeping your voice monotone and controlled despite the roots of hurt spreading in your chest.

"You're on the six a.m. train to Busan, right?" Your lack of response gives him all he needs to know. "I know I'm cutting it close, but please, don't get on that train before I can talk to you. I owe you that. Please, [Y/n/]."

Tears form in your eyes, but you push them away. "You've been cutting it a little close for six months. I don't want anything from you; you owe me nothing. I—I need to go."

"No, no, please. Don't leave just yet. I know I've been stupid and blind and an absolute idiot. I've been absent from your life and haven't put in the work with our friendship the last six months. I didn't see that you were hurting, and I didn't see that my feelings had changed in the last seven years. I wasted so much time, especially the last half-year, on people and things that didn't really care about me. I don't know how to make up for that."

Your brows furrow angrily, and you grip the phone tighter. "You should have thought of that before you started dating her."

As it turned out, Taehyung met his girlfriend at that very concert. She was a special guest, another idol from an extremely popular girl group. You hadn't realized it at the time, but that night sparked something between the two idols that eventually led to a full-blown relationship.

After the flight back to Seoul, Taehyung was rarely at the dorms. When he was, he was giddy ad blush-y and very puppy-like. It was clear to everyone, especially you, that something was different. So when he told the group a few weeks later that he'd met someone, no one was shocked.

"Her name is Sun-ji," he explained one night as you both were clearing the kitchen of takeout trash from the meal. The rest of the boys were doing other things, but you wanted to spend time with one of your closest friends. One you felt you hadn't seen in weeks. "She's been on break from tour with her group, just like us, for the past month. She went to our concert in Tokyo! That's where I ran into her before the show. We just hit it off and...I really like her, [Y/n]. She's nice and so pretty and she gets me."

You bit your lip and forced your voice to stay even and your face to remain joyful. "She sounds amazing, Tae. I'm...really happy for you."

Taehyung flashed his infamous boxy smile, ecstatic at your false approval. "I really hope you'll like her, too. I wanna bring her around sometime soon, just to hang out or something."

"Sounds nice." You brushed the last of the styrofoam containers into the trash. "Look, I'm tired. I have an early day tomorrow. I'll see you later, I guess."

"Goodnight," he calls after you.

"Yeah, goodnight."

Hurrying to your dorm room, you quickly slipped inside and shut the door behind you. As soon as you were in the privacy of your own space, you let the tears cascade. Every emotion you'd pent up the entire night, ever since Taehyung brought up his girlfriend for the first time, let loose. You laid on top of your covers, curled up into a ball, and let the night take away any hope you had of that being your role.

You had waited too long. You'd let your fear and lack of action take away your chance to tell Taehyung how you really felt.

Now it was too late. He had someone else. He had Sun-ji.

And he was sickeningly, overwhelmingly, all-consumingly enamored with her.

"That's on me!" Taehyung's sharp reply comes as a surprise; it's the first time you've heard him upset at you in a while. You used to bicker and fight all the time, before Sun-ji that is. Ever since she came into his life, it was you that was consoling him after their arguments.

And those were not playful and silly, nor were they fixed with a simple apology and tight embrace.

"I know I fucked up! She was not who I thought she was. She's manipulative and controlling, and I didn't see it until I was too far in. She took be away from everyone I cared about: you, the members, my family, everyone. She was poison—"

"—That you willingly went back to, time and time again!" you snap, earning stares of other people at the station. "Six months, and do you know how many times I saw you crying because of her? Do you realize how many nights I had to pick up the pieces of your heart after she broke it? She cheated on you, and you still went back to her! I never, ever would have done that, Kim Taehyung."

"I don't have an excuse or justification...other than I was blinded by the good times."

"I know, but even in those times, I knew it should have been me," you reply, your voice tearful. "I was jealous, that's true, but when I saw you smiling because of her, I knew I could make you happier. I could make you happy without the baggage or pain or guilt that she brought with her. Or if not me, someone else! Hell, anyone else would have been better than her."

There's a pause before Taehyung sighs heavily. "Do you remember the first night you found me crying?"

You nod, even though he can't see, and shuffle where you stand. The memory is an uncomfortable one, but one you'll never forget. "Yes."

"I should've left her then. Not the second time, or the third, or two weeks ago when I finally cut her off. I should have stopped seeing her right then...and I should've seen how much I cared for you."

Your eyes close, and a few tears fall down your cheeks. "Too little, too late, Tae. I'm glad you cut her off, I really am, but I have to go. I hear the train. Please, don't try to stop me. You'll only make this worse for everyone."

"[Y/n], wait—!"

You end the call without hearing the end of his sentence. Turning your phone completely off and slipping it back into your pocket, you wait out the remaining couple minutes in memory-induced silence.

You found him curled up on the sofa, a blanket laid over his child-like figure, eyes and nose bright red. He'd been crying for an hour at that point and assumed he'd have much more time to himself as the other members and you weren't supposed to be home until the evening.

How unlucky he was that you had left the studio early. When you departed, you were exhausted, but now seeing Taehyung in such a vulnerable state, you were instantly revived. Hurrying over to kneel by the side of the sofa, you pulled the blanket down from his face.

"What's wrong?" you inquired, brushing your fingers gently across his cheek.

Taehyung wiped his nose with the back of his sleeve and blinked his tears away. "Shit, you weren't supposed to see this."

"But I have, so tell me what's wrong."

The brunet sighed and shook his head. You could tell by the way he was breathing and the way his eyes were watering that it was taking every ounce of strength he had not to break down again. "Sun-ji and I had a fight, that's all. I'm okay."

Your free hand rested on top of his. "Are you?"

Between your reassuring touch and concerned voice, it only took a few more seconds for Taehyung to crumble. His whimpers returned with the tears, and he reached out for you instinctively. You allowed him to pull you into the sofa with him, into his arms that caged you against him. The space was small, but with half of his frame lying on top of yours, his face buried into your shoulder, you made it work.

Though surprised at his sudden show of affection, you knew it was coming from a place of hurt and need. He needed someone to comfort him, someone he knew that wouldn't hurt him or push him away. Whatever Sun-ji and he had fought about, you resisted the urge to curse the woman for putting your best friend in such a state.

Curling around him, you nestled your arms around him and rubbed soothing circles along his shoulders and spine. Every now and then, you pressed a chaste kiss to his messy hair and whispered sweet nothings. Over the next half-hour, his sobs faded to sniffles once more, and his grip on you loosened to a comforting cuddle.

"You wanna talk about it now?" you asked, feeling his grow sleepy against you.

As you reached down to brush his tears off his cheeks, Taehyung turned his head so that his nose pressed against your neck. "I think Sun-ji is cheating on me."

Your entire body grew rigid at his whisper. "What makes you think that?"

"I saw her texting flirty stuff to someone who wasn't me. And the other night, at an event, she was sitting really close to one of the idols she'd performed with in the past. I think they used to date, but the way she was touching him...I..." He trailed off and shook his head slightly. "I confronted her about it, but she said I was being overprotective and territorial. So...we fought."

Not knowing what to say, you simply held him a little tighter and hoped that your touch was a comfort. "I'm so sorry, Tae."

"She made me feel like I was seeing things, like I was making things up or...or that I was stupid or something." Taehyung sighed heavily. "I mean, it's been three months. I thought...Well, maybe it is me..."

"No one should be treated like that. And for what it's worth, you're one of the most observant people I know. You don't see things that aren't there, you don't make things up, and you're far from stupid. She the idiot for treating you like this, or making you feel like you're not enough."

Taehyung gave a small laugh at your response. "You really don't like her, do you?"

You shook your head. "Not when she treats you like this. You deserve better."

"So do you," he murmured. "Seriously, [Y/n], you're always there for everyone, especially me. You deserve the world. I know you've said you're not really interested in dating right now, but if you ever change your mind...just be sure they're not going to break your heart. It's not worth it."

You bit your lower lip and rested your chin on his hair so he couldn't see your face. If he only knew how you'd gone against that advice for seven years now. Loving your best friend without them loving you back, that's enough to break anyone's heart.

The train can be heard before it can be seen. The high-tech piece of mechanical wonder speeds down the track at several hundred miles per hour, finally delivering on the promise of escape. Another minute and you'll be on your way to Busan.

"[Y/n]!"

Taehyung calls your name like it's the last thing he'll ever say. Voice loud and deep, he shouts it once more. As you turn, you see him bounding down the side of the platform. His eyes are wide, and his chest is heaving from the run. The station itself is expansive, and the platform is far from where he could have driven. He's come all this way to see you, and that alone is no easy feat.

You clench your jaw, trying to maintain your resolve as he approaches. "I asked you not to come."

"And I didn't listen." Taehyung slows and stops a few feet away, giving you some of the distance you asked for. His face shows confusion and guilt, some of which you're sure is there due to him showing up despite your request. "I couldn't let you leave without telling you how I feel, and not over the damn phone. In person."

"Don't play with me, Taehyung, please," you murmured, keeping your eyes away from his.

"I'm not. I'm completely serious." He takes another step closer. "Do you know why I finally broke it off with Sun-ji?"

"Because she's an unfaithful bitch who had it coming?"

He shakes his head. "No. If that were the only reason, I may have given her another chance. I would've hated myself, but you know how I give too many chances." A pause. "I broke up with Sun-ji because I realized...it finally hit me that I wasn't in love with her. I was never in love with her, and I never would be. And it hit me again that this was because I was already in love with someone else. Someone who's been my best friend for seven years, someone who's been there for me when I wasn't there for myself, someone who's been my strength and backbone ever since we became friends. I was head over heels for the only girl who's always been in my corner from day one."

The weight of his confession hits you. The longing expression on his face, the tears in his eyes, the emotion in his voice, all of it is heavy and meaningful and everything you've wanted to hear. And yet, you hesitate in your response. "I...Tae..."

"You don't have to say anything," he assures softly. "Just let me talk, then you can do whatever you want, I promise." After taking another step closer, Taehyung's lips tug at the corner to create a tiny smirk. "When I finally broke down and told the others, they called me an idiot. And I have been, for not seeing you until now and for not seeing that you felt the same. Your brother called me a moron, and I can't blame him. I don't know why I'd been so blind for so long, but now that I see you, I refuse to let you go without telling the truth."

He reaches for your hand, and you allow him to take it. His grip is tender and gentle as his fingers lace through yours. Taehyung's brown eyes have always been a weak point for you, but the way he's looking at you now—as if you're the only person in the world—is enough to make you shiver.

"[Y/n], I love you. Not just as a friend, but as something...something more. All that time I wasted with Sun-ji, I should've been spending with you." His grip on your hand tightens, as if giving emphasis to his confessions.

His gaze drops from yours as he continues. "I know our lives are crazy...and love is confusing and I'm doing this in all the wrong order, but please let me prove it to you. Give me the chance to treat you like you deserve. It's taken seven long years, but I finally see that all that time I called you my best friend, I was slowly but surely falling hard for you. It was so gradual that I didn't know it until I was in too deep.

"I know I'm too little, too late," he whispers, a wistful smile forming on his face as his free hand raises to cup your cheek, "but the heart wants what it wants. And mine desires you...if you'll have me."

You feel your cheeks burn as his words come to a stop. Despite not saying a word for the last several minutes, you feel breathless. The platform around you is bustling; hundreds of people are boarding the train, but your attention is solely on the man in front of you. It's like the world has faded away, and all that exists is you and Taehyung and this unnamed thing between you.

And yet, even after all of that, you still feel confused and hurt and lost. It's not as if your heart isn't singing in response to his epiphany; having him return your love is all you've ever wanted. And yet, you've finally come to realize that you need to take a good look at your life and your feelings. That's not something that can happen in five minutes, on a train platform, after a heartfelt confession. You know your feelings for Taehyung are long-suffering and strong, but you owe it to yourself to give both you and him some time to think.

It's such a paradox; the moment your best friend comes to you confessing his love is the moment you've finally become okay with it being unrequited.

The universe truly is a strange and ironic place.

"If you'd said that to me six months ago, I would've jumped at the chance," you finally say. "But now? I just...so much has happened, and even if you didn't love her, you really liked Sun-ji. I don't want you to see me as a backup or a fall-girl. I know now that I deserve better than being a second choice."

Taehyung's features soften at your reply, as does his voice. "You're never someone's fall-girl. You're no backup or second choice. If I thought of you like that, do you really think your brother or the other boys would've let me live?"

"True," you chuckle.

Your best friend mirrors your smile, glad to see the tension fading. "I know I'm over simplifying this, but I'll ask it anyway. Do you like me?"

Your response is immediate. "Yes."

"Do you love me?"

"Of course, I do—"

"—Not as a friend," he clarifies. "As something more."

"Taehyung..."

"Because I do."

His words aren't casual. There's an err of honesty and vulnerability to them. It causes you to let your walls down even more. You reach up to place one of your hands against his on your cheek, while the other drifts to his wrist. "Me, too. You know that, apparently."

"Then what's the issue? I know, it's a childish view on love, but can we just...start over? Start fresh?"

"I want to," you reply, looking up at him and realizing you both are closer than before, a breath away from each other. "More than anything, believe me. But I need time and space, Tae. I need time to think and work things out. I need to sort through my feelings and figure out what I really want. I need to get out of my head and heart and just..." Your sentence trails off, and you lower your head in embarrassment. "I'm sorry, I'm probably not making any sense."

"Hey, look at me for a second." Taehyung places a reassuring finger under your chin as you glance up. He flashes a mini-version of his signature boxy smile as he says, "If you need that space and time, then please, go to Busan. Go and think about your future and what you want and what you feel. I don't want to force you into anything you don't want to do. I've put you through enough. Take the time. Take the distance. Just know that if you decide you still want this—if you still want me—I'll be right here waiting for you. I'm not going anywhere unless you want me to."

"You'd really let me go, even after all that?"

Taehyung nods, though his expression is somewhat sad as he does. "You're a grown woman. You can make your own choices. If that means that you chose someone other than me, or if you chose to stay as friends, I...I can find a way to be okay with that."

An overwhelming sense of love and adoration flows over you, and you lean into his touch a little more by pressing his hand closer to your cheek. "How about...how about you come to Busan with me? I think some time to talk might do us good, away from the craze of Seoul and BTS and kpop. Where we can be just us. What about that?"

Your best friend's face brightens by a thousand, and he moves his hand from your face to his pocket. He retrieves a slip of paper and holds it up with an eager grin. "I bought a ticket in hopes that you might say something like that."

"You weren't going to force me, huh?" You cock a playful eyebrow, and Taehyung blushes.

"I was only going to use it if you decided you'd give me another chance. I wouldn't have gotten past the gate if I didn't."

"You've got balls, I'll give you that," you laugh, rolling your eyes as Taehyung continues to give a cheeky grin. "You really broke up with Sun-ji because of me?"

"Yep. Best decision I ever made--well," he stops mid-sentence, correcting himself. "Actually, second-best. Best was running here from the bus stop. I definitely wouldn't have made it if I took an Uber."

You shove him away with teasing hands, scoffing out, "You're crazy."

Taehyung doesn't let you get far. He chases after you slipping an arm around your waist and hauling you against him. His face comes incredibly close to yours; nose brushes against nose. His eyes dart from yours, down to your lips, and slowly rise back up. "Crazy about you."

"Okay, the cheesy lines are stopping right now, otherwise you're not getting on that train."

His eyes flicker from your face to the tracks behind you. His smile drops, brown eyes growing wider. "Um...about that...we gotta go."

As you turn your head, Taehyung grabs your hand and pulls you towards the train. The automatic doors are starting to close; you both were so caught up in each other and your mutual confessions that you must've missed the last call to board. Taehyung catches up just before it closes, and even though the alarm blares out of annoyance, the sides part once again.

Once you're both on-board, the doors close behind you. Taehyung wiggles his eyebrows and comments, "Cutting it close?"

"Seems to be the theme of the day," you retort, grateful to have made it with both Taehyung and luggage in tow. In a sudden realization, you eye his empty hands. "Wait, you didn't pack anything!"

"Um, yeah! You were going to leave, and it's six a.m. I didn't exactly have time to pack a bag. I barely made it in time to get a ticket."

Suddenly bursting into laughter, you lean your forehead against his shoulder. "I love you, but you are a huge idiot. Looks like shopping is on the agenda for this afternoon."

"Says the girl who got on a train at six in the fucking morning," he grumbles. "But I love you, too." Taking your hand once more, Taehyung presses a chaste kiss to your hair, causing you to look up at him in surprise. All he does is smile, a light dusting of pink across his cheeks. "C'mon, let's get a seat before this thing starts moving."

Nodding, you allow him to tug you to the back of the car, passing by several other people who are similarly attempting to get situated before departure. You find the farthest pair of booths to settle into, far away from the others. Taehyung takes the one across from yours, and helps you put your luggage in other overhead bin.

As your companion settles into his seat, you flash a grateful smile his way. He tilts his head as he responds, "What's that look for?"

"For giving me the time I need," you respond, knocking your knee against his. "And for spending some quality time with me. Feels like it's been forever since it's been just us two."

The boxy smile makes an appearance, and Taehyung pulls your feet onto his lap, a gesture he did often before Sun-ji. "In the end, you'll always be my best friend, [Y/n]. No matter what."

The train begins to move. Within seconds, both of you are on your way to Busan. Eventually, the conversation fades to blissful quiet. Both of you are feeling the effects of a six a.m. train ride across South Korea. Taehyung's gaze moves to the window, sleepily watching the scenery go by until he falls asleep with your feet still in his lap.

Your attention remains on him. Despite being tired, you're far too full of a complex variety of emotions to sleep. Joy and excitement, relief and hope, and love.

Love above all else.

Though it took some time and distance, the outcome is just as you'd hoped. And you knew then, on that homeward bound train, that Taehyung was worth it all.

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