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amarimaryllis · 3 years

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I Never Writ, Nor No Man Ever Loved (Ushijima x Reader)

Pairing: Ushijima/Reader

Prompt/Summary: Shakespeare wasn’t wrong, you’re just afraid of admitting the truth. Alternatively, Ushijima Wakatoshi’s first love never died.

Tags: Angst, Haikyuu Timeskip Spoilers

Note: I used she/her pronouns for the reader, You might wanna reread the ending of “All The World Drops Dead”, I gave Ushijima’s mom a name, Ushijima’s a rich boi, Bold Italicized sentences are excerpts from the poem “Sonnet 116” by William Shakespeare

Warnings: Swearing, Heavy read, Author doesn’t know how off-seasons work, Mentions of separation

Part of A Sensitivity to Ephemera

Ushijima Wakatoshi was your antithesis, in a sense, and somewhere in the sky, Cupid laughs.

Way to go for putting the most incompatible people ever, am I right?

You found beauty in the temperance of words. Enjoyed their sheer ability to paint a hundred stories with only strokes and letters. Words meant everything and nothing all at once, and snippets of different stories appeared with each changing context. Ushijima, on the other hand, found beauty in the directness of words. Observed in the brutal honesty that constantly leaves his lips. He preferred to have it all laid bare, no hidden meaning, no ulterior motive. What you see is what you get.

Let me not to the marriage of true minds

Admit impediments. Love is not love—

It was with words that you two ever even met, back in your first year at Shiratorizawa. Ushijima was not the best at literature, or any subject aside from Physical Education, and you were the panacea that the concerned teachers had offered as a remedy for the ace. It was a rocky start, but eventually, the relationship had grown into something more.

A literary genius and an athletic prodigy.

A master of language and her stumbling apprentice.

And eventually, a poet and her muse.

You never thought it would work out, but somehow, it did. And you were thankful that it did because you wouldn’t be where you are today. Standing in front of a large window overlooking the city, reminiscing on the events that led you to your present reality.

—Which alters when it alteration finds,

Or bends with the remover to remove.

Ushijima comes up from behind you and grips your hips with his large hands before he presses a tender kiss on your nape. “What’s on your mind?”

You smile as you turn around in his grasp to wrap your arms around his neck. “Nothing much.”

Ushijima raises a brow as he moves his hands from your hips to your waist. “By nothing, I’m guessing you mean anything and everything.”

You grin as the two of you begin to sway to the silence. Dancing to nothing but the sound of your breaths and the noise from the city below. “You know me too well.”

“You haven’t changed a bit.” Ushijima smiles as he pulls you in for a kiss.

You smile into the kiss, wrapping your arms tighter around Ushijima’s neck to pull him closer to you. The telltale signs of lovesickness had been set in motion in your body once more: warming cheeks, speeding heartbeats, and crashing lips.

As you find yourself pulled deeper into Ushijima’s embrace, you wish for the world to freeze this moment. Unmoving. Unchanging. Immortalized in your memory and for the rest of your waking reality.

A few days after your engagement with Ushijima, you found yourself in the place where it all started. Shiratorizawa had not changed at all since you left. Sure, the notices hung on the wall, the faces that roamed the rooms, and the shape of the shrubbery had changed, but everything else was the same as you remember it.

You shut your eyes, take a deep breath, and it’s almost as if you’re transported back to 2012. A year of loss, victory, stagnancy, and change. So many had happened, and it all rushed past you in the blink of an eye.

“Love—“

“Yes!” You stand up straight from the bench, eyes wide open in an attempt to pull away from your little flashback. “Yes, hi. Sorry, Toshi, I was… Lost in thought. Are you done talking to Washijo-sensei?”

“Yes.” Ushijima chuckles softly as he flicks your forehead lightly. “You should be more observant of your surroundings. What if it wasn’t me who found you?”

“But you did, didn’t you?” You grin up at him only to see him looking ahead.

You turn around and your eyes land upon a familiar sight.

Warmth floods your cheeks and Ushijima laughs as he wraps his arms around your waist, resting his chin atop your head. “I remember Tendou catching us there.”

You smile fondly at the memory as you look at the tree beside the volleyball gym. “Not my fault you kissed me all of a sudden.”

“Not my fault you look absolutely irresistible.” Ushijima’s warm breath tickles you as he leans down to whisper against the shell of your ear, placing a quick kiss before he lays his chin back onto the top of your head.

O no! It is an ever-fixed mark

That looks on tempests and is never shaken;

Ushijima Kimiko’s eyes were burning holes into your skull. It was clear from the moment you had stepped into the house that you were not welcome. That you were not the one she wanted for her son.

There’s bitterness in the way she looks, the way she acts, and the way she speaks. She’s eloquent, so well-spoken that you wouldn’t have noticed the insinuation of each backhanded compliment she threw your way. Her son seemed to be oblivious to the silent war of undertones and context buried underneath your exchange of seemingly harmless words. It had gone on for the entirety of dinner, his mother unforgiving and you unrelenting. If she thought her disapproval would send you running, then she was sorely mistaken.

After dinner, Ushijima leads you to his room. A place you had not acquainted yourself with because this was the first time Ushijima had brought you into his home. Your lover sits on the bed, watching you while you familiarize yourself with the setting.

“So this is where you grew up.” You smile to yourself, choosing to bury the events that transpired earlier into the darkest corners of your mind in hopes that it would be consumed into the void. “Nice room.”

Your eyes trace over every inch of the room, taking in what you can to better understand the man that you were soon going to marry. It’s plain, nothing revealing anything personal save for the pictures lined up and hung on the wall.

There were many different faces. A young girl, a few boys, some familiar, some unknown. There were also pictures of some teenagers, particularly the members of the Shiratorizawa Volleyball Club.

“Is something bothering you, love?” Ushijima asks from his bed where he’s currently seated. “You haven’t been talking much since dinner.”

You froze on the spot, having an internal debate on whether or not you should voice your concerns.

“Come here.” Ushijima beckons you to come closer and you do. You stand between his legs, placing your hands on his broad shoulders as you continue to look at the pictures behind him. Ushijima reaches for your hand on his shoulder, intertwining your hands there as he plays with the ring on your finger. “Something’s wrong.”

“Toshi…” You sigh, giving in. “I don’t think your mom likes me very much.”

It’s Ushijima’s turn to tense up. “My mom doesn’t like anyone.”

“Yeah well… I think she hates me.” You fiddle with Ushijima’s collar. “God, I hope not. I really wanted her to like me too…”

“In time.” Ushijima smiles as he pulls at your hand to make you cup his cheek. “But for now, let’s talk about it at home.”

It is the star to every wandering bark,

Whose worth’s unknown, although his height be taken.

Ushijima sits alone on the couch, waiting for you to come back. You had left after a heated exchange, unable to stand being in the same room as him, it seems. A few weeks had passed since your visit to his childhood home, and things in your relationship have been somewhat rocky since then. While Ushijima wanted his family to accept you, he knew that their disapproval wouldn’t stop him from pursuing a life with you. You were the person who stood by his side when nobody else was there. The world would have to end before he let you go.

But you didn’t understand that. You were still stuck in the events that transpired at the dinner table while Ushijima was already walking towards your future. He knew he shouldn’t have invalidated your concern simply because he could stomach going against his mother. He just wanted this argument to end, he had an Olympic game tomorrow, and he didn’t want to walk in there with a heavy heart that would most definitely affect his performance.

The ringing of the doorbell pulls Ushijima from his thoughts. He stands up and walks towards the door to answer it, wondering who it could be since he did not remember inviting anyone.

When he opens the door, it is not noticeable, but there is shock written on his face. “Sato-san, what brings you here?”

“Ah, Waka-kun! Your mom told me I’d be able to find you here.” Sato pushes a paper bag into Ushijima’s hands, her eyes disappearing into lines as she gives him a bright smile. “I just got back from Cali, and I wanted to give you your souvenir and some ingredients from Kimiko-san…”

“Ah, thank you.” Ushijima gives a soft smile as he grips the paper bag tighter in his arms. He knew that his mother was in the area, visiting so that she could watch her son’s game tomorrow. “Would you like to come in for some coffee?”

“Ah no! It’s fine.” Sato waves her hands, smiling as she turns the offer down. “I have to go meet up with a friend.”

“Ok then.” Ushijima nods. “It was nice seeing you again.”

“Same here.” Sato moves to walk off. “I’ll be off then.”

Love’s not Time’s fool, though rosy lips and cheeks

With his bending sickle’s compass come...

When you come back home, Ushijima is quick to pull you into his arms. A string of apologies falls from his lips, weaving their way into your hearts as you melt into your fiancé’s embrace. The walk had cleared your mind enough, and you knew that Ushijima had a point. If he was willing to brave it out despite his mother’s disapproval, then you would do so as well.

After all had been said, and the issue was closed, you both retired for the night. Ushijima lays on his side of the bed, and you on yours. You turn to your side and are met by Ushijima’s broad back. Scooching closer, you wrap your arms around him, press a kiss onto his nape, and mumble, “I love you.”

You wait a few seconds for a reply, but you are met with silence. You sighed and wrapped your arms tighter around him, nuzzling your face between his shoulder blades. He was probably asleep.

Ushijima was wide awake. Memories of a young girl with bright eyes and rosy cheeks running through his mind. And as he loses himself to vivid images of the past, sleep never laid itself upon his eyes that night.

The next day, you make Hayashi rice from the ingredients that his friend had delivered, and you wish him luck.

Apparently, that luck wasn’t enough because the Japan team had lost to Argentina that day, and as much as you wanted to comfort Ushijima, his mother had gotten to him first and was now talking to him inside the stadium.

You waited outside of the venue, sitting on the steps that led up to the doors that opened to the realm of competition and Olympic athletes. You could only wait it out, not wanting to bother your fiancé and his mother in fear that the latter might attack your very being once more.

The sound of footsteps comes closer, and you turn around quickly in hopes to see your lover, but you are met with the sight of their trainer instead.

“Oh, Iwaizumi-san!” You stand up to bow. You notice the red at the corners of his eyes as if he had been crying. You don’t ask. It was normal to be upset after a loss. “You guys fought well, Iwaizumi-san.”

Iwaizumi smiles but it doesn’t quite reach his eyes. He moves to sit beside you on the steps, and you follow suit. “Hey, L/N-san…”

“Hm?” You reply with a hum. While Iwaizumi and you were not close, you two were still familiar enough with each other to carry a casual conversation. “What is it?”

“You’re a writer.” Iwaizumi states, but there is hesitance in his tone.

You can’t help but snort. “No shit.”

Iwaizumi glares at you, and you suppress a laugh. “Ok, I’ll stop, but yeah, I am. Why?”

“That means you’re good at the poetic symbolism shit right?” Iwaizumi asks for confirmation and you resist the urge to laugh at his choice of words.

“I like to think that I am good at the—“ You use your hands to show air quotes, “—poetic symbolism shit as you said.”

“Does first love never really die?” Iwaizumi asks and you nearly choke on air.

Iwaizumi is looking at you expectantly, and you look like a deer caught in the headlights. Out of all the things that could happen in your life, talking to Iwaizumi Hajime about his love life was not something you even thought of ever happening. Not even a single bit. It’s silent, and you realize that Iwaizumi is waiting for a reply.

You pause to think, not wanting to give Iwaizumi a half-assed answer that could make whatever he was going through worse. It seemed like Iwaizumi was more hung up over this than he was over the game they just lost, and while you don’t know the full story, you realize its gravity. “It’s something people like to say… Haven’t quite understood it because I’ve never felt it…”

You smile sadly. It seems like Iwaizumi wasn’t given the similar luxury of living out the rest of his life with his first love. “First love never dies, but true love will bury it alive.”

“And what if your first love is your true love?” Iwaizumi asks, his fists clenching as he looks down at the steps.

“Then you’ll spend the rest of your life mourning a lifetime that was never meant to be yours.” You sigh as you pat Iwaizumi in the back. “You never really know if it’s true love, Iwaizumi-san. Tomorrow promises nothing, after all. The only time you’ll ever truly know is when you’re a breath away from death and reliving your entire life.”

“Fucking hell.” Iwaizumi mumbles to himself. “Love is hard.”

“It is.” You smile. “But whatever the situation, Iwa-san… Don’t deprive yourself of the opportunity to move on, yeah? It’s kind of like volleyball.”

Iwaizumi turns to look at you. “How so?”

“Well, when you get blocked during games, do you stop spiking for the rest of the game?” You raise a brow.

It’s silent until suddenly, it’s not. Iwaizumi is laughing. He’s standing up, and he pulls you up before enveloping you in a hug. “You genius, I hate that you have a point.”

You reach around to pat his back, happy that your words somehow enlightened him. You knew that this enlightenment was brief and that somewhere along the way, Iwaizumi would be tempted to give up, but you were glad to have at least given him a way out. “As I said, I’m good at the poetic symbolism shit.”

A cough interrupts your little hug session with Iwaizumi, leading to the both of you pulling away and turning to the source of the noise.

It seems like the universe just loved screwing you over because standing at the top of the steps were three people: two familiar faces, and one that was teetering between remembrance and oblivion.

Ushijima Kimiko looked smugly angry. Her son looked confused, tinges of betrayal creeping into his eyes. The young woman beside them on the other hand looked absolutely livid as her eyes flitted between you and Iwaizumi.

“How scandalous.” You could hear Ushijima Kimiko whisper to her son. “Are you sure this is the woman you want to marry?”

You pretend you don’t hear it, forcing a smile and a bow. “It’s nice to see you again, Ushijima-san.”

Iwaizumi on the other hand does not let the comment pass. “There’s nothing scandalous about the situation, Ushijima-san. I simply asked my friend for advice and showed my appreciation. She loves your son too much to ever even think of looking at other people.”

You notice how the stances of Ushijima and the young woman relax.

“I’ll keep that in mind.” Ushijima Kimiko’s smile is tightly lipped.

The drive to Ushijima’s penthouse was silent and absolutely tense. Ushijima’s knuckles were practically white with how tightly he was gripping the steering wheel. You can see the creases between his brows deepening as he clenches his jaw in both frustration and concentration.

“Who was the girl from a while ago? She looked familiar.” It was a seemingly harmless question on your end. You didn’t want to talk about the game because they did lose. You didn’t want to bring up his mother because that would be another argument. You didn’t want to talk about Iwaizumi because you figured that maybe the hug you shared was the reason for his frustration. So you decided to settle with the one thing in that situation that had no heavy feelings attached.

Well, you were sorely mistaken.

Ushijima tenses up before he relaxes. “She’s my childhood friend. She used to be my closest friend until middle school.”

“Ah.” You nod to yourself. “Cool.”

“She means nothing to me now, if that’s what you’re worried about.” Ushijima quickly added.

“Ooooh, did little Toshi have a crush on her?” You tease, trying to use this opportunity to lighten the mood.

Ushijima tenses up before a fond smile makes its way to his face for the first time since this morning. “She was there for me throughout my childhood. She helped me get through my parent’s separation.”

You didn’t know why, but you finally realized why she looked familiar. It was minimal, very minimal… But there was a large similarity between her facial and body structure and yours. And as you realize this, the conversation you had with Iwaizumi echoes disturbingly through your head.

Love alters not with his brief hours and weeks,

But bears it out even to the edge of doom.

Although they had been given a month-long break after the game, Ushijima was still out most of the time. Some part of you was bitter over the fact that your fiancé chose to spend more time spiking balls and playing with his teammates (that he already plays with on a regular basis), but you don’t pressure him to stay. If that made him happy, then you were happy with it as well. But still, some part of you wishes that he would just stay in with you and cuddle while you type your next piece on the laptop.

Later that night, Ushijima comes home with his arm slung around Kageyama who looked like he had just walked through hell and back. There’s a dopey grin on his face as he reaches out for you and crashes his body against yours. The smell of alcohol fills your nostrils, and you scrunch your nose up in disgust.

“Please take care of Ushijima-san.” The setter bows lightly before straightening up.

“Thank you for bringing him home.” You smile at Kageyama who blushes a deep red.

“I’ll take my leave.” Kageyama bows and walks off.

You shut the door once you see that Kageyama has made it to the elevator.

“You’re so pretty…” Ushijima’s grin is wide as he cups your cheeks. Nuzzling his nose against yours before peppering kisses all over your face. “Can’t believe you’re here…”

Ushijima presses you against the door and leans down to capture your mouth into his. He presses against you, grabbing at your wrists to wrap your arms around his neck as he pushes his mouth harder against yours. There’s desperation in the way he digs his fingers into your hips as he lifts you and pulls at your legs to wrap it around his waist.

“I love you so much…” Ushijima whispers between kisses as he nips at your neck. “Don’t ever leave me again… Fuck.”

Ushijima’s hand creeps under your shirt, trailing on your skin while his other hand supports you against the door. As good as it felt to be finally receiving attention from your lover, you grab at his wrist to stop him. “Toshi, you’re drunk. Let’s go to bed first, yeah?”

“What happened to Waka-kun?” There’s a pout on Ushijima’s face, and you would find it endearing if you weren’t confused by the words that left his mouth.

Choosing to chalk it up to his drunken stupor, you just smile, unwrap your legs from his waist and bring him to bed. “You need to sleep.”

Once you two were settled in bed, Ushijima nuzzled himself into your neck as he wrapped his arms around you from behind, positioning himself to prepare for sleep.

His breath tickles your neck as he mumbles, “Don’t ever leave me, please.”

“I won’t.” You smile as you sink deeper into his embrace. “I love you too much to do that.”

“You love me?” Ushijima was a talkative, sappy kind of drunk, it seems. “Really?”

“Very much.” You mumble as you intertwine your fingers with his.

“You’ll stay with me forever, right?” Ushijima’s voice is weak, almost as if he was afraid of what your answer could be.

“Of course.” You answer without a second thought.

You can feel Ushijima kiss your neck before his breathing starts to slow. It’s a whisper, the way he says it, lips brushing as he lightly mouths the words into your skin, but you hear it clear as day.

“I love you, Fuyumi-chan…”

If this be error and upon me prov’d,

You stare blankly at the Instagram profile on your laptop screen, your hands on the table as you focus all your emotions into clenching them as tight as possible. The apartment is quiet, but the noise in your head is a different story. Voices, faces, and emotions flood your brain, each wave stronger than the last as it threatens to drown you into the void of your head. You briefly wonder where it all went wrong.

When Ushijima decided to get drunk? No, it wasn’t.

When Iwaizumi hugged you after their loss at the Olympics? No… It wasn’t that either.

Maybe when you had visited Ushijima’s childhood home? No. Although it seemed like it went downhill from there… It wasn’t that.

It all went wrong the moment you allowed yourself to fall in love with Ushijima Wakatoshi.

“Good morning.” Ushijima smiles as he sits across from you on the floor on the other side of the coffee table.

You force a smile. “Slept well?”

Ushijima freezes for a split second before recovering. “Had a good dream.”

“Good for you.” You don’t know how much longer you can pretend like your relationship wasn’t falling apart. “About the wedding—“

“We’re having it in 2 months right?” Ushijima interrupts you, and for some reason, it looks like he’s trying to avoid something. “I’m still on vacation, so I’ll be able to help you and the coordinator plan it—“

“Let’s call it off.” You interrupt with a smile.

“Do you want to move it to a later date?” Ushijima furrows his brows as he reaches over, grabbing your left hand, his heart sinking when his thumb brushes over skin instead of silver on your finger. “Where’s your ring?”

“Wakatoshi,” You start with a smile, your voice as steady as it could be while a war rages in your head, “I don’t want to get married anymore.”

For someone who understood words best when they were said directly, Ushijima Wakatoshi was having a lot of trouble understanding you right now.

Ushijima’s frown deepens, but he continues to speak casually. “That’s fine. We don’t have to be married to love each other, right? That’s just a formal ceremony—“

“I’m leaving, Wakatoshi.” You attempt to pull your hand away from his grasp, but Ushijima holds it tighter.

There are tears in his eyes as he looks at you, and you’re almost tempted to stay. Ushijima crying was not a common sight. You had only seen it happen once in the entirety of your relationship, and your heart breaks at that thought.

“When will you come back?” His voice is desperate as he looks into your eyes, searching for any sign indicating that you’ll stay. He finds none.

You can only smile. “I’m sorry.”

You stand up and shut your laptop, walking off to your room to pack your things. You didn’t want to make this harder than it had to be. You didn’t want to see him cry, and you didn’t want him to see you cry. If this was love then it seems that Shakespeare was wrong, or maybe what you have isn’t love. But if it isn’t love, then why did every single step away from Ushijima’s crying figure feel heavier and more painful than the last? Why did you yearn for him despite the stabbing in your chest?

When Ushijima hears the door of your shared bedroom close, he opens your laptop, wondering if he’ll find an answer there.

And he did.

Sato Fuyumi’s unmoving face stares back at him, a smile etched onto her face as the sun shines brightly behind her. At that moment, Ushijima understood. Last night was no dream, it seems, but he had blurred the lines between fantasy and reality and that led to the inevitable decay of whatever it was that you two had. With that, Ushijima stood up and walked to your shared room, one last time.

“I’m sorry.” Ushijima states from the doorway. He expected you to be packing your things, but he didn’t expect that seeing it would hurt this much. It was almost as if you were ripping his chest open with each clothing you pulled from your shared cabinet.

“I know.” You whisper, unable to trust your voice.

There’s silence as Ushijima sits beside you on the floor.

“Toshi...” The name feels heavy in your mouth as you speak. “Did you—“

A sob somehow manages to break free, and now you were crying.

Ushijima pulls you into his chest, guilt and despair filling his chest as he feels you sob and shake in his hold. He wishes he could make it all go away, but how could he when he was the reason you’re this way in the first place?

“Please tell me the truth…” You grip at his shirt, your forehead pressed onto his collarbone as you let the tears fall one after the other. “Did you… Did you ever love me?”

Ushijima answers with no hesitation. “I did.”

You cry harder into his chest as you mourn the lifetime that could’ve been yours. Images of a distant life fill your head: a home in the countryside, a young boy, a young girl, a loving husband. You allow yourself to bask in the illusion for a second before you pull yourself away. You were afraid that if you had stayed any longer, you’d never be able to walk away.

“We can make it work, Y/N.” Ushijima pleads one last time. “This is just something we have to work through. We’ll get past this and then we’ll live the rest of our lives together. We’ll go to the countryside when I retire, raise our kids there—“

You cut him off. “Stop.”

“You could write from there. It’s peaceful, no one will disturb—“

You cry harder into his chest, gripping tighter at his shirt. “Stop please, just stop already—“

“We can still make it work, Y/N. Just stay—“

“Just stop!” You pull away, daring to look into Ushijima’s eyes. “It’s never going to work. We would be living a lie if I agreed to all of that. It’s clear that you’re still in love with her, and you always will be!”

Ushijima’s shoulders slump down in defeat, and he lets you cry it all in front of him.

“And what if your first love is your true love?” Iwaizumi asks, his fists clenching as he looks down at the steps.

“Then you’ll spend the rest of your life mourning a lifetime that was never meant to be yours.”

Your own words haunt you.

I never writ, nor no man ever lov’d.

You realize it now, looking back.

Years of denying the poet only for you to agree with him in the end. It took you 3 years, but now, you were ready to admit that Shakespeare was right in all he said about love. Everything around you was just pointing in a different direction, you just didn’t realize it when you were still in the middle of it all.

It was a mess you no longer wanted to revisit, but you brave through it for your friend.

You watch the love of your life mourn a lifetime that could’ve been his.

Ushijima Wakatoshi watches as the love of his life goes down the aisle.

Sato Fuyumi smiles as she sees the love of her life waiting at the end of it.

Iwaizumi Hajime looks ahead one last time as the love of his life sits somewhere in the crowd.

And somewhere in the sky, Cupid laughs.

A/N: I feel like this should be classified under “Angst/No One Gets A Happy Ending”. Also, I finally gave Iwa some closure AHHHHH I hope you guys liked this one! Feel free to drop my by ask, I’m always up for a discussion, after all. 💖

#ushijima x reader #ushijima wakatoshi #haikyuu #haikyuu imagines #haikyuu x reader #genre.angst #cont.spoilers #tw heavy angst #tw swearing #tw separation

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spencerreidslove · 4 years

Note

Angst but maybe no spoilers bc I’m only on s1😅

A/N: You are BOLD for reading fanfic when you’re in season 1. I could never. I was actually really excited to write this beacuse I’ve never written anything with Elle before and I love her. I tried not to spoil anything but we’ll see if I did a good job.

————

He was drifting. You could tell.

Three phone calls and no answers to any of them. You thought about calling Penelope and asking her if Spencer was ok, but you didn’t want to bother him if he was in the middle of the case.

It was dark outside and he still wasn’t home. Spencer said that they would be celebrating his birthday at work, which they did a few days ago, but then they got called out on a case.

Earlier today, Spencer had briefly called you and said that he would be home tonight. It was nearing 2 am and and he still wasn’t home.

You sighed as you looked at the cupcakes you had baked and put them in the fridge. Vanilla with chocolate frosting. Spencer’s favorite.

Maybe they ended up getting delayed with the case or the weather was bad and they couldn’t fly. It didn’t matter.

You went into your bedroom and slid into bed. You had work tomorrow and it wasn’t worth it waiting up for Spencer.

The next morning when you woke up, Spencer was in bed beside you. He was fast asleep, and you didn’t want to wake him, so you quietly slid out of bed and made your way to the kitchen.

You stood there for a moment before pulling out boxes of cereal and started making coffee. You were going to make waffles, but if you started now they wouldn’t be done in time for you to leave for work.

As you sat and ate your cereal, you flipped through the pages of a book. A little while later, Spencer came out from the bedroom, rubbing his eyes.

“Mornin’” you said, glancing up from your book.

“Hi.” Spencer said. He opened the fridge, and looked at the cupcakes that were sitting there. On the top in purple frosting they spelled out “Happy Birthday”

“Did you get delayed last night?” You asked, going over to the sink and rinsing your bowl.

“Yeah. Bad weather.” Spencer said quietly. You sighed. For being such a good profiler, Spencer was a horrible lair. Whatever had kept him last night it wasn’t weather.

“Well, we can celebrate tonight, right?” You asked.

“Yeah, unless I get called away.” Spencer said. You went back into the bedroom and got dressed. A few minutes later you were leaving to get to work.

“Bye, Spence! Love you!” You called out to the bathroom where Spencer was showering. You hoped the silence on his end was due to the water.

Over the course of the last few weeks Spencer seemed to grow more and more distant. His calls were brief, conversation short.

You knew deep down it was coming to an end, but some part of you just hoped it would all go back to how it was.

When he said “I love you too.” Instead of ignoring you or hiding away in the bathroom so he didn’t have to answer.

Today you were hopeful. Spencer was gone on a case, but he had been gone for three days, so you hoped he would be back today.

Around three, you got a phone call. It was from Elle. Even though she worked with Spencer, you, her, and Penelope had become fast friends.

“Happy Birthday!” She said as soon as you answered.

“Thanks!” You said, laughing. “Are you guys done with the case.”

“Yeah, we’re headed to the airport now and it’s a long flight so don’t expect Reid to be home til late.” Elle said.

You chatted for a few more minutes before she said she had to go because Morgan was bugging her.

Later you got calls from everybody but Spencer saying Happy Birthday to you. You hoped that was just beacuse he had a surprise planned, but deep down you knew that wasn’t it.

You stayed up on the couch watching your favorite movies and TV shows until nearly midnight. You decided to get ready for bed and then give Elle a call ask if they were off the plane yet.

You got an answer after a few rings. “Hey.” Elle said when she answered.

“I just wanted to know if you guys were off the plane yet.” You said.

“Yeah, we landed two hours ago.” Elle said. “Is Reid not home yet?”

Your silence was the answer.

“I’m sure he’s just planning something for you. You know the kid, he probably just got carried away in Party City or something.” Elle said, trying to reassure you.

“Yeah, I’m sure he’ll be home soon.” You said. After a few more minutes, you hung up and grabbed a book and sat down on the couch.

You read for a little while before you fell asleep.

Around 3 am, you woke up to Spencer leaning over the couch and pulling a blanket over you.

“What are you doing out here?” Spencer asked with the most care in weeks.

“I was waiting for you.” You said, waking up. You took in his appearance. Spencer wasn’t holding any bags, or anything special, he looked how he normally looked.

“Why?” Spencer asked. “You shouldn’t have waited.”

You took a long look at his face. “Spencer what was yesterday?” You asked.

“Tuesday. The 18th.” He said.

You shifted so you were sitting up. “What else?”

Spencer didn’t answer.

“You have an eidetic memory and you don’t remember what yesterday was?” You said, getting a little upset.

“No? Should I have?” Spencer said.

You scoffed. “It was my birthday, Spencer. Everybody remebered but you. I even got a message from your boss telling me happy birthday but you couldn’t bother to remember!”

Spencer paused, before realization dawned on his face. “I didn’t mean to forget! I just...with the case, I only got back half an hour ago!”

“I know you’re lying. I called Elle to ask when you had landed. You got back at 10. Where were you?”

Spencer didn’t answer.

“Where was so important that you couldn’t be home on your girlfriend’s own birthday?”

“I was at JJ’s for dinner. I lost track of time and fell asleep there. I meant to be home sooner...but.”

You paused, trying to collect your thoughts. “Is that where you’ve been going recently? To JJ’s?”

Spencer’s silence was the only answer you needed.

“You don’t love me anymore, do you?” You asked.

Spencer didn’t answer.

“Do you?” You asked, needing to hear him say the words.

“No.” Spencer whispered. “I don’t know how it happened. I loved you until I didn’t.”

“Get out of my apartment.” You said quietly.

“Y/N, what?”

“Be glad we never moved in together, and get out of my apartment. I will bring you your stuff tomorrow. But for now, get out.”

Spencer grabbed his bag and quietly left. The moment you heard the door close, you broke down and sobbed.

Your heart was broken in two. You loved Spencer more than you had ever loved another person, and just like that he was gone.

He didn’t love you anymore.

Maybe you were never meant to be together from the start.

Tags! (Open)

@rexorangecouny @magnificentmgg @rachelxwayne @itsmyblogandillreblogifiwantto @andreasworlsboring101 @just-damn-bored @zhuzhubii

#aaron hotchner #cm #criminal minds fanfiction #david rossi #derek morgan #dr spencer reid #emily prentiss #jennifer jareau #spencer reid fanfic #mgg #elle greenaway #spencer reid imagine #spencer reid x reader #spencer reid fluff #spencer reid fic #criminal minds x reader #criminal minds fic

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morganaspendragonss · 4 years

Text

this is the part where the silence takes hold

in which i say fuck the sparrow academy and dump 1300 words of angst because i’m not over it.

spoilers for season 2 in case the tags don’t filter it

ao3

Five days after Ben saves the world, there’s a knock on Klaus’s door. He hasn’t really left his room since they got back to 2019, sometimes venturing out for food or another bottle of Dad’s booze, but he hasn’t spoken to his siblings.

They’re all staying at the Academy for a while, save Allison who went back to LA to see Claire as soon as she could. Diego and Vanya will probably be leaving soon, too, and then it’ll just be Klaus and Luther and Five.

He should be happy. They saved the world twice over, all in one fell swoop. Everything is back the way it was. He finally has some peace and quiet - something he’s been searching for his entire life.

Thing is, Klaus kind of hates the quiet.

Quiet means Ben is really gone. He forgets sometimes, and goes to say something, a, “Hey, Ben,” slipping from his lips before the silence drags out and Ben is gone.

So he gets drunk. He plays loud music and ignores his siblings because they don’t get it. How could they? They did their grieving thirteen years ago, or seventeen, depending on how you look at it.

Five days after Ben saves the world, four days after they come home, there’s a knock at Klaus’s door. He doesn’t answer, hopes whoever it is will go away, but the knocking just becomes more insistent, driving spikes into Klaus’s head.

“Klaus, open the damn door,” Diego calls, impatient. Klaus rolls his head to stare at the door but doesn’t move otherwise. Easier, he thinks, just to wait for Diego to let himself in.

A minute later, he does. He raises an eyebrow at the empty bottles scattered around the room, at Klaus slumped on the bed, but doesn’t appear otherwise surprised. Maybe Klaus would be offended by that if he could even feel anything right now.

“Come on, Klaus,” Diego says, voice unbearably soft this time. “Dinner’s ready, and you haven’t eaten and - Jesus, Klaus, have you just been existing on booze since we got back?”

Klaus shrugs. Turns away from Diego. “Just leave me alone.”

“I’m not leaving until you get your ass out of bed,” Diego says. His hand lands on Klaus’s shoulder and for a second Klaus can pretend it’s Ben. But the hand is too heavy and too big and the grip too tight as it tries to pull him up and out, and Klaus tries to fight against it.

Problem is, Diego is far stronger than Klaus. He yanks Klaus into a semi-upright position, scowling at him now. “You know,” he comments. “Ben wouldn’t want this for you.”

And Klaus sees red. “Fuck you, asshole!” he yells, summoning all his strength to shove Diego away. “You don’t know what Ben would want, you don’t know shit about him!”

There are tears stinging Klaus’s eyes and Diego looks like he just slapped him across the face. Klaus would feel bad, but now his anger is draining out of him, leaving his chest yawning and empty. Ben’s disapproving face mocks him in his periphery, but Klaus blinks and he is gone, really gone, Ben is gone.

Klaus sighs and slumps against the wall. “He would be so pissed at me,” he says quietly, just as Diego turns to leave. “You know I was sober for three years back in the 60s? Fell off the wagon just after I met Allison.”

Diego half turns towards him, body still tight with anger. Klaus can’t blame him for that. “Oh yeah?” he asks, voice carefully controlled. “What happened?”

“Oh, you know,” Klaus says airily, waving a lazy hand. “Lost love, 60’s homophobia. The usual.”

Diego doesn’t seem to know how to respond, his mouth opening and closing like a fish. “The sucks, bro,” he gets out eventually.

Klaus scoffs. “Yeah.”

“And…” He shuffles awkwardly, hands clenching and unclenching at his sides. “I’m sorry about Ben.”

Something breaks in Klaus’s chest, an overwhelming pain erupting in his chest. He squeezes his eyes shut and curls into himself, tears beginning to slip down his cheeks. “I’m sorry, too,” he chokes out. “I shouldn’t have said he wasn’t there, I should have - I could have manifested him.”

“What?” Diego breathes.

Klaus nods, a sob escaping him. “All those years we were together, he missed all of you. He hated being a ghost, hated that I was the only one he could talk to. I think he even hated me sometimes.”

“Klaus -”

“He was right to,” Klaus interrupts. “I was an asshole, and he was too, that was why I didn’t say anything. I wanted to get back at him. But now he’s gone, and he never even got to talk to you all, and it’s my fault, Diego, why did I do that?”

Diego is silent for a long time, so long that Klaus begins to suspect he’s left. Normally, he relies on Ben to tell him these things, but that’s the point of the silence, isn’t it?

“Well…” The floorboards creak, making Klaus jump as Diego comes to sit next to him. “I got to talk to him, you know? When he was -”

“Possessing me, yeah.” Klaus sighs again, looking up at Diego. “He shouldn’t have done that.”

Diego frowns. “He - What?”

“I didn’t want him inside me,” Klaus explains tiredly. “Can you imagine, having your body violated so...thoroughly? And by your dead brother, no less? I let him in for a little while because I felt bad for him, you know? The guy just wanted to talk to a girl, but then things got weird and you showed up, and I told him to get out of me but he wouldn’t. Fucking hell, Diego, it hurt.”

Diego looks suddenly guilty. “I told him to stay inside you,” he whispers, horrified. “Shit, Klaus, I’m sorry, I- Is that what happened at the bar with Dad?”

“Yeah, except he didn’t warn me that time. Asshole.”

“Ben was always the nice one,” Diego says. “When we were kids. Hard to believe he would do that.”

Klaus shrugs. “Not really. Being dead did wonders for his personality.”

Diego’s got that look on his face - not-quite guilt, not-quite grief, but somewhere between the two. “He sounds like a prick,” he says after a long while.

Klaus laughs, mixed with a sob. “Yeah. Yeah, he was,” he says. “He would have fit right in with the rest of us.”

“Yeah.” There are tears in Diego’s eyes now, and Ben smiles in the corner of Klaus’s eye. Then Klaus blinks, and the smile is gone with the rest of him.

“How do you do this?” he asks Diego. He waves his hand - Goodbye - and hopes Diego will understand.

“Do what?”

No luck, then.

Klaus chews on his lip, fingers tangling in his bedsheets. “You know. Move on. Say goodbye. I’ve never… Not even with Dave, but I’ve never had to - you know - with Ben. He’s just always there. And now…”

“Now he’s not,” Diego finishes quietly. He takes a trembling breath. “Man… I don’t know. It takes time. But we can help you through it. If you come down for dinner.”

Diego stands and holds his arm out to Klaus. Klaus stares at him in disbelief. “You’re a dick, you know that, right?”

Diego shrugs. “Makes two of us. Come on, you can’t change what we did back then, but maybe you can make up for it by telling us all about Ben.”

Klaus hesitates. He eyes up Diego’s arm, then glances at Ben’s corner. It’s empty, but of course it is.

Ben is gone, after all.

Klaus waits a second more, letting the hurt overwhelm him for a second, hurt over Ben and Dave, both dead, both gonegonegone. Ben is gone to a place even Klaus can’t reach, and he’s not sure he could summon Dave if he tried (and, oh, how he’s tried), and all he’s got left is memories.

Ben’s smile. Dave’s laugh.

Ben’s bitching. Dave’s embrace.

Memories. His to keep. His to share.

He takes Diego’s arm.

#tua spoilers #umbrella academy spoilers #the umbrella academy #umbrella academy #tua #tua season 2 #klaus hargreeves #ben hargreeves #diego hargreeves #dave katz #klave #tua fanfic #fanfiction #my fanfiction #writing #my writing #yall i made myself cry writing this what the fuck

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kyber-kisses · 4 years

Text

What About Y/N?

Dean Winchester x Reader

Warnings: spoilers for season 14, blushy Dean, idk my dudes

Summary: When John is yanked into the future he sees that his oldest Son still hasn’t made a move on y/n.

A/n: this has been swimming around in my head for awhile so I’m finally writing it. I hope you guys like it! If you wanted to be added to the forever taglist, just hit me up.

When you returned to the bunker after a rare solo hunt, you had no idea what insanity you were about to walk in on. The only thing you were looking forward to was a much needed hot shower, a decent meal, and maybe enough time to get through an episode of Game of Thrones with Dean. But that was a long shot even.

Parking your car in the garage, you took your time gathering your things and walking down the hallway towards your room. Throwing your duffel onto your bed, you stripped the dirt and blood stained clothes from your body. Dean and Sam could wait. The hot shower was your top priority right now.

You knew you had made the right choice, ten minutes later stepping out of the shower and feeling like an entirely new person. And fresh clothes only made it that much better. Wrapping a towel around your hair, you ventured out of your room towards the library. It was good to be back. It was good to be home.

“Sam! Dean! I’m back from that Wraith hunt in Washington!” You announced, ascending the stairs into the library, busying yourself by rubbing the towel through your hair in an attempt to dry it quicker.

The brothers had been so per-occupied by the event unraveling in front of them that they failed to remember you would be returning tonight. Your voice sending them turning in unison to face you, revealing the figure partly hidden behind them.

And then things got weird.

You were stopped dead in your tracks at the sight of one John Winchester, standing very much alive between his two sons. Meanwhile your towel was still pressed against your hair.

“What- the- hell is happening?” You stated slowly, eyes darting between the brothers. Dean shot you a smile, beaming at the sight of you.

“Hey y/n! Our Dads back!” Dean grinned, bringing up the obvious. You dropped the towel, eyes still wide as you nodded slowly.

“Yeah.” You breathed out, “ I can see that.” You put your hand up in a half wave at their father, still trying to steady your breathing. “ Hey, John. How’s it going?” You tried, still looking very confused.

You were one of the very few that had been in the Winchesters lives long enough to have known John, hell, you met them when you were in your pre-teens. The point was, John knew who you were and you knew who he was.

John let out a light laugh, an amused look on his face. “ I’m doing alright y/n. Thanks for asking. Apparently it’s been awhile.”

You locked eyes with Dean again, silently asking for a explanation. “Yeah, you could say that.” Dean could see that you were dying for an answer so he quickly stepped forward.

“Y/n, I was just gonna go out to grab stuff for dinner, you wanna tag along?” He asked, grabbing his jacket off the nearest table along with the set of keys for Baby.

“Uh yeah- sure.” Your words coming out slow as you had trouble taking your eyes away from their father. This was too weird.

As Dean stepped down the stairs, you quickly forced your body into motion, following him down the hallway. Once you knew you were out of earshot you turned to your best friend.

“Okay, mind telling me what I just walked in on?” You asked, looking over at Dean who, if you were being honest, who looked happier than you had seen him in a very long time. A huge smile on his face as he looked over at you.

“I’ll explain on the way. Long story short, Sam and I found a pearl that can give you what you want most in the world- or something. One minute there was nothing and then all of a sudden, BOOM. Dads standing there with a shot gun pointed at the two of us.”

“Well that definitely sounds like your dad.” You nodded, sliding into the passenger seat of the Impala.

Over the next hour Dean filled your in on the entirety of the story. From the odd wishing pearl to the fact that it wasn’t a permanent thing. While John was here, time would continue to warp and change. They would have to reverse the wish after dinner. You could see the sadness in Deans eyes as he told you, and you wanted nothing more than to be able to fix it for him.

When you returned to the bunker, you helped Dean unload everything from the car, pausing mid way to the kitchen. Dean stopped when he saw you frozen in the hallway, adjusting the groceries in his arm as he walked back over to you. “ you alright?”

You let out a sigh, giving the green eyed hunter as small, faint smile. “ Dean, I shouldn’t be here.”

Dean let out a huff, giving you a confused look. “what the hell are you talking about?”

“This is a family thing Dean. You always talked about wanting this. I’m not going to intrude. I’ll just go back into town for the night.” You shrugged. Moving past him, you stepped into the kitchen, setting the groceries on the table.

“Okay, first of all-“ Dean corrected you, moving to set his own bags down next to yours. “ You are family and second, I want you here. You’re my best friend.” He turned to look over at you, a smile lighting up his face.

Oof. There it was again. That one little title that had you so conflicted. Of course Dean was your best friend as well, but you also wanted something more than that. And you were sure Dean didn’t feel that way about you. “Are you sure? What if they don’t want me here?” You questioned.

Dean gave you another annoyed look before turning to unpack the groceries. “ are you kidding me? My mom loved you from the moment I introduced her to you and my dad? Even though he would never admit it, he thought of you as his other kid.” He chuckled. “So in conclusion. Your staying and that’s final. Got it?”

“Alright fine.” You exhaled, smiling over at the older Winchester. It was good to see him happy.

*. *. *. *.

And that’s how you found yourself seated down at one of the library tables, wine glass in hand as you watched Sam and Dean retell an old story about how the three of you had to go digging through a pond when Dean lost the keys to the impala during a wraith hunt a few months back.

You smiled into your wine glass as Dean rolled his eyes. Another memory came to your mind, making you slap Dean in the shoulder. “You gotta tell em the story about the fairy!”

Dean whipped his head around to glare at you, wide eyed. “ I’m not telling the fairy story y/n.”

“I’m sorry- fairy story?” John questioned, leaning forward with a raised eyebrow and a light smirk.

“Oh yeah. It’s one of Deans greatest victories.” You nodded, a grin appearing on your face as you took another sip of wine. “ He fought a fairy.” You swiveled your head, sending Dean your growing grin.

“I haven't heard this one either. Now I’m interested.” Mary laughed, leaning forward in her chair and resting her chin on her palm as she looked to her eldest son.

Without much choice, Dean groaned, diving into the story about how he was abducted by aliens and then forced to fight a fairy. The whole time you were trying to keep a straight face, but with everyone else laughing it was terribly difficult.

“It was a little glowing, hot naked lady.” Dean sighed, looking down at his hands which were folded in his lap.

“And then what happened Dean?” You smiled, trying even harder now to hold in your laughs.

“And- and she hit me.” He mumbled in defeat, sending you back into a full fit of laughter along with everyone else at the table. You were laughing so hard tears were streaming down your face as you grabbed your stomach. The rest of the Winchesters not far behind you.

“Oh god, I’m gonna pass out.” You heaved,looking back over at Dean who was shaking his head, only this time he had a small smile on his face.

“Okay get your laughs out.” He sighed.

“Oh, we are.” You laughed again, wiping away the tears on your face. You looked over at Dean, eyes locking almost immediately. You gave him another smile, silently apologizing for teasing him. The smile was returned, which made your heartbeat quicken.

You didn’t see it, neither did Dean, but for a good portion of dinner John was watching the two of you, smirking at the playful and childlike banter between you. Sam and Mary had noticed it too, but they were used to it. You and Dean dancing around each other , both afraid to make the first move.

It reminded John of him and Mary way back when. When times were simpler. Just two young idiots very much in love.

As dinner finished up, you helped clear off the table, you and Dean maneuvering around each other in perfect sync. It was interesting to watch to say the least.

As Dean left with the last of the dishes, heading towards the kitchen, your eyes settled on John, who was leaning against one of the pillars in the library.

You ventured over, tucking your hands into the pocket of your sweatshirt. “ Is it weird? Seeing how much they have changed?” You questioned.

John turned to you, letting out a breath. “ it’s definitely weird, but I can still see somethings haven’t changed.”

You tilted your head, wondering what on earth he was referring to. Shaking it off you sighed, “ you should be proud of them. They have helped a lot of people and they’re easily the greatest men I have ever had the joy of knowing.”

“I am proud of them. Hell, I got no words to express how proud I am of those two. I mean, Dean is still stubborn as hell-“

You let out a laugh, turning your head towards the kitchen.” Yeah, and I don’t think that’s going away any time soon.” You agreed, also realizing there was still work to be done. “I should probably go help in the kitchen.” You ended, giving John a nod before walking away.

You passed Dean in the hallway, who sent you another smile and gave your shoulder a squeeze as he entered the library.

Once John knew you were out of earshot, he turned to Dean, raising an eyebrow. “ I can see you still haven’t told y/n how you feel?” He smirked.

“Is it really that obvious?” Dean sighed, dragging a hand down his face as he fell into one of the chairs. John sitting down across from him.

“Yeah, Son. It’s still insanely obvious.” John laughed, picking up his glass of whiskey. “ I just feel bad for Sam, having to go all these years watching you two dance around each other like a couple of kids.”

Dean let out a defeated laugh. “How do I know if she even feels that way about me?”

John rolled his eyes, leaning forward. “ You two really are blind arn’t you? Just tell the girl. You’ll be fine Dean.”

“How do you know that? Y/n is a loose canon, you never know what you are gonna get with her!” He exclaimed, throwing his hands in the air before letting them run down his face again.

“Just trust me on this.” John sighed, still mildly amused by how his eldest was reacting.

Dean was quick to lean forward, pointing his finger at his father. “Alright, but if this goes wrong, I’m blaming you.”

*. *. *. *. *.

This was not how you expected your night to go when you initially got home. You thought it would just be another night of microwaving takeout and watching some dumb show with Dean. And then you got the exact opposite. A full home cooked meal, a night of laughter, and a very happy Dean Winchester. Your heart was fucking full.

But slowly as the night came to a close, you could see Dean starting to sink, the inevitable goodbye he would have to give to his father drawing ever closer.

You eventually found yourself perched on one of the tables, the jade eyed hunter by your side. Mary and John were having one final discussion together, and Sam was leaning against one of the pillars in the library, clearly lost in his thoughts.

Turning your head, you looked over at Dean, a small sympathetic smile tugging on your lips. He looked so sad, and it broke your heart. Carefully you reached over, intertwining your fingers with his and leaning against his shoulder.

“It’s gonna be okay Dean.” You sighed, feeling his hand squeeze yours. You were keeping him grounded through this whole thing. Keeping him sane. He was grateful to have you in his life.

“I know- I just- I’m tired of saying goodbye to people.” He mumbled, going to rest his head against yours.

“Well I’m not going anywhere- you’re stuck with me till the end Winchester.”

“Good. I wouldn’t want it any other way.” He agreed with a light chuckle, eyes falling towards your intertwined hands.

It was unusual, he didn’t think anything of it at first, but now? He was only just realizing that you had never held his hand before. Sure there was the I’m grabbing your hand and pulling you with me while we run from this monster sort of hand holding, but this was different. This was gentle and loving.

You watched as his eyes stayed locked in your hands, slightly amused by how intrigued he looked by it. You smiled, taking your free hand and placing it on his face, before pressing a sweet and firm kiss to his cheek. The action surprising the both of you slightly.

And then something happened, that you never expected to see in a million years. A warm red bloomed across his face, his eyes quickly looking away. He was blushing. Dean Winchester, your best friend since childhood was blushing, turning into a rosy faced mess.

And it was fucking adorable.

The two of you out so caught up in the moment that you failed to notice the grinning Winchesters in the doorway.

*. *. *. *. *.

“You keep these boys out of trouble for me, you got that?” John grinned, pulling you in for one last hug.

You let out a light laugh, stepping back. “I don’t think the strongest power on earth could do that. But I’ll try.”

Moving back, you watched as one by one said their final goodbyes. The pearl that caused this all to happen, sitting ominously on the table next to you. Dean stepped forward, his father pulling him into a bone crushing embrace.

“She adores you, you know.” John stated slowly, low enough that you couldn’t hear it. “I can see it in the way she looks at you. So can Mary.”

The beginnings of what could only be a smile tugged on the corners of Deans lips as he slightly nodded. Yet at the same time he looked pained. Too much was going and he didn’t want to lose his Dad again.

“If you love her, tell her. Even if your scared it’s not the right thing. Even if your scared it will burn your life to the ground, you say it, and you say it loud. You got that, Dean?” John continued, grabbing Deans shoulder and pulling into another crushing hug.

All Dean could do was nod. His dad was right. You never knew how this life would play out- when your time was up. Life was too short to wait in fear.

“Now let’s get this show on the road.” John chuckled, pulling back with glossy eyes that matched everyone else’s.

You watched with a sad smile as the Winchester family collapsed into one last group hug. They all looked so terribly sad, but happy at the same tile that they got this at all.

“Get in here y/n. You’re our damn family too.” Before you could register it, you were being pulled into a massive Winchester sandwich, nestled snugly under Deans arm.

This was nice. To have a family. To have people who loved you. To have a home.

It took the strength of all of you combined to pull away from each other, Dean stepping back to the place where the pearl lay. Mary remained next to her husband, their hands wound tightly together.

You could see Deans own hand shaking as he picked up the bowl to smash the pearl. He was breaking. Doing what you could, you reached out taking his empty hand in yours once again. He looked down in surprise, before going up to meet your eyes in understanding.

“It’s Okay. I got you.” You assured him. He slowly nodded, showing you he understood.

You looked back towards John, who sent you and Dean both a wide smile. Who knew your lives could so quickly change in matter of hours.

And then Dean brought the bottom of the bowl down hard on the pearl, shattering it in one go.

You felt Dean slightly jump in pain besides you, his hand gripping yours tighter as he ignored the tears freely rolling down his face, eyes frozen on the spot where John had been standing just seconds prior.

You could tell he was heartbroken. Shifting the bowl from his grasp, you wound your arms around him, pulling him into you. “It’s alright. I got you. I got you.” You repeated, running your hand up and down his back in an attempt to help calm him. Though delayed, he moved to wrap his arms around you, chin coming to rest on your shoulder as he sank.

“Thank you.” He mumbled, attempt to regain his breathing.

Everything was going to be alright. He was gonna make sure of that.

(A/N: Tell me what you guys thought! this things been sitting in my drafts for ages and I finally finished it. If it gets enough notes ill write a second part.)

#supernatural #dean winchester #dean x y/n #dean x reader #dean winchester one shot #dean winchester x reader #dean winchester imagine #spn x reader #spn x y/n #spn one shot #supernatural x reader #bi-danvers writing

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staliasjeronica · 3 years

Text

Riverdale S5 Ep11 Thoughts *Spoilers*

thoughts under cut to keep tag from being cluttered :)

- Oh yeah I forgot that Chad was blackmailing Veronica about the dirty dealings in her company even though it’s not her at all (unless it’s just been so long and I’ve forgotten but she’s my baby and I feel like I would’ve remembered but-

- Hiram and this dumb prison is one of the worst things for this show it’s a constant plot of people escaping and it’s so annoying like sure Hiram owns it and he was in the jail but no one has, like, taken him back to jail…??? Hiram is a fucking disease smh

- “back to remote learning” why didn’t you just stay that way though… like even right now in covid schools are opening back up and kids are complaining because it’s still not safe so like… just… go back to it??? I’m so not built for this world fasdhfkahf

- Veronica and Smithers 🥺🥺💞💞

- the way Veronica hugs Archie is so cute bc she’s so tiny but like she always gives her all and Archie is just 😐 never giving anything ahjfsdfsh it’s quite sad you can tell how done KJ is with Varchie lol

- “I really hate that I’m dragging you through this.” … what about constantly pulling him into your mob boss father mess that the writers refuse to allow you to escape from?

- “until you and Chad are officially done, I think we should keep our distance.” Varchie bones!!! you just KNOW that Archie has been looking forward to this because that man is whole heartedly in love with Betty and has been since forever and that while Chad prolongs the divorce papers, Archie will not be waiting for Veronica considering he doesn’t want her. Varchie = bones we love to see it!

- now who tf would join Penelope Blossom’s ministry… no one, realistically.

- can Cheryl stop being given the craziest and usually most boring plots ever please...

- Not someone holding a gun to Tabitha literally don’t hurt Riverdale’s best girl weirdo

- these bitches really haven’t aged huh…. poor Veronica though being robbed but like they stole some watches or something and the opal like that’s all you take..?? okay-

- Fangs 💞💞💞💞💞 also rip to him having to work with his ex tho

- STOP HAVING ARCHIE GO TO HIRAM WE’RE TIRED

- You know considering the whole reason why Hiram is still here as the villain and ruining Veronica’s life/growth to keep her in his plots al because Mark is a big soap opera celeb and apparently brings in money, you’d assume they would give him GOOD shit instead of everything he’s gotten. If they hadn’t of hired Mark can you imagine how much better off the show would be if they didn’t have to keep him around bc of his status????? God why-

- Reggie’s always there for Veronica muah…. oh fuck me I guess fjasjkdf

- “I work for one Lodge and it’s not you.” lmao okay??? you acting like that’s a flex, and that you’re working for the better Lodge who literally left you to die after the Serpents thought you shot Fangs so-

- MARTY BEING WHY REGGIE IS WORKING FOR HIRAM…….. YOUR DAD IS ABUSIVE LET HIM HANDLE HIS OWN DEBT??? God both Veronica and Reggie are always fucked over when it comes to their parents huh

- don’t you just love when they make characters act ooc for a plot ahhhhhh it’s totally fun to watch and totally not frustratingly annoying

- “FOR OLD TIMES SAKE.” 💞💞💞 we love Veggie even though they made Veronica act ooc and hurt him back then and they weren’t given an actual chance.

- “don’t be such a Betty” now why is Betty so surprised she only ever had fun when she was with Archie, when she’s with Jughead all she did was do what she wanted and order him around so likeefjhakdfh

- “he shouldn’t really be my problem anymore.” BUGHEAD BONES YASSSSS

- I know it was just a sound they used but like that squish sound when Darla kicked Tom’s face… did she like smash his face in damn what is this The Walking Dead?

- see the problem with them randomly bringing characters/parents in when they need them is that they’re never around so like no one really cares… like they could have utilized the parents so much (and Skeet and Marisol never would have left) and it would have been so much better than random appearances that make them look incompetent and awful parents because they’re never there during all the other times their kids need them. but we have to see the two toxic parents that won’t go away constantly??? literally what the fuck

- Betty calling Jughead’s writing cringey wbk she’s never liked his writing she was just stroking his ego bc she was his gf and had to be supportive lmaoo

- why are these 60+ year old men beating up Jughead like for why???

- so they just forgot that Tom was checking in on the convict huh gotta love dumbing down characters for plot!

- Fangs with his switchblade muah

- jealous Tabitha muahhh over a password

- “wait THE BETTY?"

- Cheryl looks so good

- Find meaning in his death… girl didn’t you not care that your husband killed your son over the illegal maple stuff I forgot the plot but it was something illegal and dumb

- “drain the vein” …...

- Reggie helping muah

- Why is Archie acting like an ass? like sure he doesn’t know that Chad is abusive and toxic but c’mon fucker you cheated on her and never apologized and you don’t even wanna be with her in the first place so why are you acting like you’re personally hurt sit down

- God Archie really hates Veronica huh… I don’t even blame him considering the shit she’s brought him into time and time again.

- Jughead was kicked like maybe five times yet he was fine falling out of a two story window and the serpent imitation but now he needs antibiotics..? plot convenience!

- literally don’t remember anything about Doc tbh or him talking to Donna and Bret like—

- ever since Negan people are obsessed with bats with barbed wire.

- also! yes please kill Hiram <3 I know they end up saving him bc of the opal but c'mon

- they searched basically nothing for five seconds wow such great detective work you guys!

- we know you just want his manuscript Jessica

- Cheryl with her rainbow skirt how cute!

- “daddykins” girl you’re like 25

- Veronica acting like she cares about Hiram fjsadhkfhas these guys thinking that they’d kill Hiram even though they need him lol

- bad bitch Ronnie we love her even though she’s gonna have to save her father to save others and get her opal </3

- not Veronica calling Archie first and not Kevin considering Kevin’s dad is there…. this is the pandering va fan service bs we have bc it makes no sense and it’s so forced

- Fangs knowing Archie rides with tools in his truck mmhm that’s a little sus idk how but archiefangs agenda coming through!

- no one would actually believe that Jessica ashkjdfsj and they take this bait…??? you gotta be joking lmao

- Jug got to help doc this time 🥺😭

- …. tell me why when he said boyfriend I immediately thought of Reggie I hate myself for wishing fahsdjkfsafj

- okay as cheesy and corny and awful the fight scene is since they posted a clip of it, them working together is so refreshing and nice we love leader!Veronica bc she’s so good at it. but the show only cares for Betty which is funny since she’s an awful detective fbahsdjfj

- my god enough with Jason’s body!!!!!!!!! you burned his body please let him stay dead let his body rest

- okay but the back and forth from Betty and Jessica is so good like I wish we could get that kind of rivalry drama type stuff all the time. too bad they refuse to let Veronica act like a normal person and get angry at being cheated on and such :/ when will Veronica slap the fuck out of Betty

- he’s not a blameless victim but Betty take responsibility for how awful a person you are PLEASE

- THE VOICEMAILLLLLLL Jughead only speaks the truth! it’s weird that he only realized what we all knew about Betty after but whatever, finally he gets upset like damn. also jeronica crumb he’s the only one to ever include Veronica smh ALSO Cole acted the fuck outta this voice mail muah

- the way Betty just sits there uncaring… she really is a freak huh god when will someone punch her in the face and take her ego down a million notches she’s so annoying

- “that’s darkness.” …?? what?

- the way bh’s relationship parallels jughead’s with Jessica though. the unhealthy habits, the bad energy, etc. except Jessica left it and Betty didn’t and it turned Betty into whatever the fuck this is. I miss s1 Betty :/

- so when will they sue Jessica for drugging them? mmhm probably never

- poor Tabitha being the only one who cares about jughead tho

- oh no I forgot there was a random musical number…

- you’re gonna have Betty and Tabitha act like THAT and not put them together so rude

- when will Cheryl be free from her mom. is was like turned on by abuse or something sigh why do the toxic (and most boring!) parents get plots and screen time and everyone else doesn’t...

- Veronica would be able to do Moree than pepper spray but whatever only Betty is allowed be “badass"

- fangs being fangs ugh so sexy my babyyyyy

- Trevor Stines is so attractive it’s a shame they only bring him back for five seconds to traumatize Cheryl over and over again though </3

- wow varchie in a pop’s booth what season is this again??

- god it’s so upsetting how amazing varchie would have been as just friends…

- the way he smiled at Veronica was so contradicting to the blank, “please don’t” expression when she was telling him she was gonna get divorced as fast as possible. why can’t he just admit he doesn’t want to be with her!!!!!! my god they’ve put off barchie long enough just let them be together so their characters can finally act in character and stop being so awful and annoying

- “this cause” what cause you fucking weirdo

- not Hiram threatening the mayor he could literally be your downfall if we had good writers fjasdkjfasf

- jughead how would you have killed him with a small wooden basket

- I like doc so much but I know we’ll never see him again until we randomly need him seasons from noow

- Betty wasn’t hit by the drugs until after the message though… how would she not remember? it didn’t seem to be doing anything to Betty until the bunker

- hopefully since they’re friends now Tabitha can make Betty act like a decent human being <3

- the way Tabitha looked at Betty please stop doing this to me...

- maybe we can finish that dance!!!!!!!!!!!!!! jabitha rising bughead dying we love to see it!

wow that episode felt like it was two hours long but thankfully I finally finished it… don’t have many actual thoughts but anyways hope you enjoyed my live blog of my thoughts!

#Riverdale #Thoughts #Spoilers

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courage-a-word-of-justice · 3 years

Text

Fairy Ranmaru 3 - 5 | TWEWY 3 - 5 | HGPC 6 - 12, 22 - 24 | Back Arrow 7

Adding the tag for Fairy Ranmaru, because that's the only anime I have really set for this season.

Fairy Ranmaru 3

· Update: For some reason, I didn’t quite realise he was speaking English the first time and then repeating himself in Japanese. It’s only a very short scene, which is probably how it happened.

· LOL, that one well-timed beam that only vaguely obscured Uruu’s butt…

· If I heard small Uruu right, he calls her okaasama and not okaasan.

· LOL, Asahi (morning) = Yuuhi (evening) beer.

· I wonder what’s up with Houjou? Is he gonna be evil, like (SPOILERS!) the manager in Mahou Shoujo Ore? Why doesn’t Houjou have wings, anyway? Update: Notice the main quintet get rid of the wings in some shots and then conjure them when necessary. It might just be Houjou hasn’t needed his wings yet…

· Hmm…I’ve been thinking about how Japanese HypMic fans buy lots of CDs and merch (crazy amounts, have you seen the shrines???) to do something similar, but their purpose isn’t really to keep their characters’ careers going in as much as it is to further a plotline…so is it really on the same level as this [buying all the photobooks for the sake of helping the relevant celebrity succeed]? I dunno, you decide.

· LOL, conveniently-placed light beams are really terrible this episode.

· …wow. That got…uh…suggestive (?) (I was really shocked when I saw that the first time. How did they manage to get away with that on late-night TV???)

· We went from Madoka Magica -> moe world -> ukiyoe world…what’s next?

· …uh…suggestive? (x2)

· They really like the pot theme, huh…?

· I dunno if that was meant to be poignant that Ranmaru said Uruu was crying on the inside, but…I laughed at it.

HGPC 6

· Wait, so why was Nodoka’s mum unemployed? Was she moving for work? Update: Seems she quit her job because Nodoka was hospitalised.

HGPC 7

· (no notes, sorry!)

HGPC 8

· SKY appears to be “Sukoyaka”. Update: Yep, later you see Chiyu with the track outfit and it says SKYK.

HGPC 9

· (no notes, sorry!)

HGPC 10

· (no notes, sorry!)

Back Arrow 7

· This general with the big beard kinda looks like Archie (from Pokemon).

· Hmm…I think I like Prax already, with the sole exception her Briheight looks rather similar to a palette-swapped Muga.

TWEWY 3

· This song must mean so much more to people who’ve played the game…(The OP, I mean.)

· Shoumetsu…it means “erasure”, technically. Will wait and see if it means more in context.

· Subaru using his normal voice as Beat. I think Ichiro is also his normal voice, or slightly gruffer and/or lower.

· Tower Records, as anime fans know, is an anime/music store. They’re well known for their “no anime, no life” stuff (exhibit A: the HypMic Rhyme Anima version).

· Ooh, Shibuya Marui. Reminds me of the one I saw in Akihabara.

· One of the signs in the back says “Shibuya First Bank”.

· “…1 Days” (sic).

· Why do I seem to recall Neku can only use one of his badge powers as a time…? Where did I learn that from?...I don’t know.

· The final boss defeated in episode 3. There is surely more around the corner…

· Ohhhhhhhh! That’s a big twist!

TWEWY 4

· Parco = this department store chain. Known mostly for P’PARCO shopping centres.

· *opens calculator on computer* The square root of 10814 is 104…Shibuya 104. Update: It’s 109 in real life, but 104 here.

· Are those…crabs? *Crab Rave plays in background*

· The Reapers at the top have cardinal directions in their surnames, but Uzuki doesn’t. That’s because her first name means the 4th month of the calendar. Update: Kariya has the character for “hunter” in his surname, too.

· LOL, Yoshidaya (in the back, a parody of Yoshinoya).

· I wonder, why is Joshua’s power so similar to Neku’s fire pin…?

· Rhyme has “dream” as one of the kanji in her name.

· Kangaroo Noise…(*thinks about HypMic ARB* Not more kangaroos…) (<- kidding)

· Oh no! I read spoilers before this so I knew Beat was going to become a Reaper, but…oh nooooooooo!

HGPC 11

· Exploding dandelion seeds…now that’s novel!

HGPC 12

· Ah, so here’s Batetemoda’s intro…(he’s such a chuuni…)

HGPC 22

· Skipped a bunch of episodes because I saw them already.

· The decision to write “Asumin” without the U is a bit weird, I think, but still a valid one.

HGPC 23

· (no notes, sorry!)

HGPC 24

· (no notes, sorry!)

Fairy Ranmaru 4

· LOL, he (Juka) tossed poor Bakkun…

· LOL, censorship bottles.

· Brass ring. I’d never heard of the term before and I’m an English (kinda-)native speaker. (Technically Cantonese is my first language, but English is my best.)

· Did you see Uruu’s rubber duck?

· Bakkun’s a couch now! Cute!

· …so basically, Juka is a healer. Got it.

· Note how the F is green now…

· I always look away at the kiss scenes. They’re a bit of a waste of time, methinks.

· LOL, the randomly-placed effects and beams over Juka’s bits.

· Oh, Sunflowers. That would explain why Starry Night is Juka’s painting in the OP, like Uruu’s is the Great Wave.

· …and here’s Starry Night now, right on cue.

· JKRM???? (Shouldn’t that be L…?)

TWEWY 5

· The A in “CAT” looked slightly like it had cat ears.

· Wait, if this was with flip phones back in the day, did they still have apps then…? Or was it programs?

· Ooh, orange badge.

· ”Fresh Humburger”, LOL.

Fairy Ranmaru 5

· Note the opening segment has a plain chatreuse background for Ranmaru (aside from a scratched effect, like someone’s rubbed a pencil lead over it), fireworks for Homura, the Wave for Uruu, Starry Night for Juka and…I don’t know what Takara’s is, but it’s bright yellow and has spots on the edges.

· LOL, Bakkun’s use of sauces. If they only eat curry, why do they have tomato sauce and mustard, anyway…?

· I don’t think I ever properly understood what “out to lunch” meant…”temporarily not in command of one's mental faculties.” There you go!

· The sign’s F is gold this time…

· Yeah, around when she said “you bought all my vegetables”, I noticed the boxes said “carrots”, “potatoes” and so on. I didn’t even know “carrot” had kanji until yesterday, believe it or not (and I learnt that from a HypMic fan comic…*sweatdrops* Samatoki hates carrots).

· I dunno why, but men in anime sure seem to be proud of eating meat…

· LOL, weirdly-placed light beams over Takara’s butt. (I don’t know whether to call the staff “cowards” for refusing to showing the full butt or not.)

· Even the money has pots on it! I love how this anime keeps on going with that joke…(lel?)

· As it turns out, fuhen means “unchanging”. Yaochou likewise means “fixed game”, but it’s a pun on the word for “grocer” (八百屋, readyaoya and sharing the first two kanji, hence the English translation of “Fixed Grocer”).

· Oh! I had to think about it a little, but Ruise = Seiru (sale) backwards. (Update: Sort of, there's a line in the middle that has to be covered for with the I.) “Oshida”, I think, is meant to mean “authority”, so to put that with Fuhen would mean something like “eternal authority [over Ruise and her dad, due to their debt]”. Update: You know when the bull gets pushed out of the ring? That’s called oshidashi.

· Hmm? That star badge Takara wears in human form seems to be that yellow thing on his shoulder in fairy form.

· Hmm…come to think of it, “bull” was the name of a type of stock market speculator…What a pun!

· Why does Takara keep licking his lips???

#simulcast commentary #Fairy Ranmaru #Back Arrow #The World Ends With You #Subarashiki Kono Sekai #Healin' Good PreCure #Chesarka watches F-Ran #Chesarka watches TWEWY #Chesarka watches Back Arrow #Chesarka watches HGPC

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gumnut-logic · 4 years

Text

We’ll Be Home For Christmas 5.1

Title: We’ll be home for Christmas

Day Five – Here on Tracy Island – Part 1 Prologue | 1.1 | 1.2 | 2.1 | 2.2 | 2.3 | 3.1 | 3.2 | 3.3 | 3.4 | 3.5 | 4.1 | 4.2 | 4.3 | 4.4 | 4.5 | 4.6 | 5.1

Author: Gumnut

20 Jun 2020

Fandom: Thunderbirds Are Go 2015/ Thunderbirds TOS

Rating: Teen

Summary: The boys can’t fly home for Christmas, so they have to find another way.

Word count: 3313

Spoilers & warnings: language and so, so much fluff. Science!Gordon. Artist!Virgil, Minor various ships, mostly background.

Timeline: Christmas Season 3, I have also kinda ignored the main storyline of Season 3. The boys needed a break, so I gave them one. Post season 3B, before Season 3C cos I started this fic before we saw it.

Author’s note: For @scattergraph. This is my 2019 TAG Secret Santa fic :D

No, I haven’t forgotten about this fic, and yes, it hit the six month mark about two weeks ago. I started writing this 8 Dec 2019. I’m nearly there.

Landmark, though. It is now officially my longest Thunderbirds fic, overtaking Gentle Rain today at around 60,000 words, depending on which word processing program it is sitting in. Never expected it to be this long.

This chapter pretty much wrote itself. It is almost like a role call of the five brothers and their states of mind. So a little bit of all the bros in this. I hope you enjoy.

Many thanks to @i-am-chidorixblossom @scribbles97 and @onereyofstarlight for reading through various bits, fielding my many wibblies, and for all their wonderful support.

Disclaimer: Mine? You’ve got to be kidding. Money? Don’t have any, don’t bother.

-o-o-o-

Day Five: Here on Tracy Island

Virgil woke late the next morning. It was a pleasant awakening, slipping from deep sleep to doze to a peaceful warmth beneath the covers. His room was dark. Darker than his cabin on A Little Lightning and with decidedly less sway.

He lay there for a while, enjoying the lack of need to get up and do anything and the absence of pain. He had slept the sleep of the dead and was thoroughly rested. There was something to be said about sleeping in your own bed at home that no holiday anywhere could provide.

But honestly, he wasn’t one to sit and do nothing for long, his brain kicking into gear while he lay there, listing off things waiting to be done. A visit to Two to reassure himself she had been checked over and was ready should she be needed. Not that he didn’t trust his family, it was just for his own peace of mind.

He should be able to get away with it so long as he didn’t spend too much time down there.

It took him a full half an hour of random rumination to realise that it was Christmas Day.

Oh shit.

The clock said eleven am.

His family...

He sat up abruptly and was thoroughly reminded of how stupid such a move was.

Oh, for the love of...

He grunted and rolled over until his face was smothered in his pillow.

The medic in his brain listed off the reasons why he shouldn’t have done that and why he needed to be careful and, goddamnit, he was sick of this. It was only an appendix, for crying out loud.

Stupid surgery.

That could have been so much worse.

He was being a spoilt child.

He let out a breath into his pillow, its warmth wrapping around his face. Another week and he would be fine.

But now, it was eleven oh five on Christmas morning and he was holding his family up.

He clambered out of bed with minimal complaint from his body, into the shower, a shave and into his familiar red flannel, jeans and boots.

It was such a comfort to be home.

He blow-dried his hair, gelled it up and made himself presentable.

The man who stared at him from his bathroom mirror was one appendix less and a whole pile of experience more.

He hummed to himself, tasting the notes in his throat. He could feel the soft whale skin under his fingertips, hear the lap of the water, the breeze in his hair...

And the music.

His eyes were closed without permission, the imagery taking over his mind. His fingers tapped against the bathroom vanity marking out the beat and rhythm of what he was trying to say, the pictures warping into abstract and lack of understanding.

Salty and long spoken, the notes repeated.

He didn’t know how long he stood there under the bathroom light, eyes seeing another world somewhere below the ocean surface.

By the time he shook off the haze it was eleven forty-five.

Almost lunchtime.

Alan would be foaming at the bit.

He pushed himself away from the sink and killed the light. Walking carefully across his room, he shook himself, rolling his shoulders. Get it together, Virgil. Your family is waiting for you.

Out through the door, down the corridor and, screw the stairs, he was taking the elevator.

It swallowed him whole.

-o-o-o-

Gordon had been up since before the sun. It was a sign that he was home. A session in the pool brought familiarity into the equation. There was definitely a difference between swimming in the pool versus the ocean and it had nothing to do with water salinity.

The ocean was beautiful and he adored it. But the pool sported no threat, no need to monitor his surroundings beyond the presence of a mischievous brother or two, leaving him to be able to focus on his stroke and let his mind wander.

The pleasant warmth of well used muscles pulling him forward through the water, simple thought processing...and considering the last few days, there were a lot of thoughts awaiting examination.

Some he had managed while piloting A Little Lightning on the home stretch, but there were still more needing answers and tactical decisions.

Sam. Mel. Scott. John. Virgil.

As far as he knew, Scott was still planning on inviting the neighbours over today. That would place Sam within reach of the apparently resistant Virgil.

He understood where both men were coming from. Virgil needed time and Sam was just a ball of eager energy.

Gordon was stuck between the two.

Push came to shove, he would side with Virgil regardless. He had too. But he really didn’t want to be divisive. If Virgil would talk just a little, it would help not only Sam and himself, but it might assuage the ball of worried energy that was Scott.

His arms sliced through water until he reached the end of the lane, his body automatically flipping and turning into the push off surge in the opposite direction. Air, splash and his hands slicing through the water again.

Okay, he would admit that he was worried himself. At first it was just amazing. His brother could sing to whales! A breakthrough. But yesterday he witnessed exactly how spaced Virgil became when singing and everything screamed wary. Humpback whales were beautiful creatures, but so big and so possibly unintentionally dangerous.

He couldn’t let Virgil anywhere near a whale alone. It just wasn’t safe. There was so much they didn’t know and the urge to protect his gentle brother just swelled in his heart.

They needed to investigate further. Find out exactly what was going on. Make sure his brother was safe. That it didn’t affect any water rescues.

They couldn’t afford to have Virgil spacing out in the ocean at random. As it was, Gordon wasn’t going to let Virgil anywhere near the ocean during rescues for the foreseeable future. He could stay up in Two.

Safe.

Whale song could travel around the globe.

His native realm had become a hazard for his big brother and that was unacceptable.

They had to find out what was going on.

John and Eos had made a good start, but Sam and himself needed to investigate further and soon.

Virgil needed to cooperate for his own safety.

Gordon broke his stroke, pushed himself to the side of the pool and rested his head on the concrete a moment, letting his body float randomly.

Blood pumped through his ears, his heart still running at exercise rate.

He needed to convince Virgil.

Somehow.

-o-o-o-

Scott revelled in the early dawn light. His feet pounded on his wonderfully familiar route around the Island. A trek he hadn’t laid eyes on for a week.

His runners crunched volcanic gravel beneath them.

The sun was just rising on Christmas Day, the beautiful weather hanging strong, the sea a stretch of glass disappearing off into the horizon. His current trajectory pointed him directly south where he knew beyond the glass lay Raoul Island. A single spot in a sea of blue, so similar to the even tinier spot that was Tracy Island.

Same sea of blue.

A pokey tree appeared on the side of the track, its red flowers quite glorious in the morning sun, and he found himself grinning. Sure, he knew the correct name of the pōhutukawa tree, but Alan’s name was so much easier to pronounce and it made Mel laugh.

His legs took the strain as he jogged up the rapidly steepening trail.

If he was honest with himself, the whole no strings attached thing was a lie. He found himself thinking about the woman more the longer they were away from Raoul.

And they only left yesterday.

As soon as the sun was high enough in the sky to be polite, he would be contacting Raoul with his invitation to her, Sam and Liam. It wasn’t the only time he had invited people to the Island, they weren’t entirely hermits, but it was rare and the first time in a long time.

And he was so looking forward to it.

Penny and Parker were due after breakfast as was the tradition. As soon as everyone was awake, they would have their present opening party, always a major family event. More for the company and laughter than the presents themselves.

He could almost hear Gordon declaring it ‘Tracy style’ complete with the arm movements to compliment the claim.

But Mel...it was like he was excited to show her the Island, perhaps because he knew she would be very interested in the ecosystem that had developed here since their father had begun repairing it over a decade ago.

And he was staring at it right now as he followed the path around the back of the Island. Pokey trees, palms and ferns were everywhere a foothold was available. Scott knew very little about their ecosystem beyond the need to keep it safe. Gordon and Virgil were the ones who knew most about it among the brothers. Gordon focussed on the sea and Virgil sometimes helped out with animal numbers and photography for the scientific group.

But Mel hadn’t been here since Dad...

He grunted and hurdled a rock he hurdled every morning as the slope inverted and started heading down. The view was stunning.

Despite the glass of the ocean, the swell still crashed on the back cliffs of the Island, jagged volcanic rock resistant to the relentless pounding.

Hopefully she would consent to the visit even though it was late notice.

He did have a Thunderbird, after all.

-o-o-o-

John hadn’t slept much. He never did when something was on his mind. His everything drove him to find a solution, particularly when a brother was involved.

Eos never slept, so she was the perfect insomnia companion.

There was also the factor that he was home, but he really wasn’t.

He was missing Five.

Now he was back on the Island, everything was screaming at him to go home.

Not that he didn’t like the Island, quite the opposite. The Island contained his brothers, his grandmother, Kayo, his family and he adored his family.

But the stars were calling to him. His body ached to feel the release from gravity. He wanted his home.

He ignored it.

His body needed gravity. It was an undeniable fact. It had evolved under the pressure exerted by the planet and while his mind adored the stars and the lack of gravity, nature demanded its return under the ‘use it or lose it’ mandate of life on Earth.

So, tired, but awake anyway as the sun hit the front of the villa, John made his way down to the pool where he found Gordon, as expected, in the water, but unexpectedly, not swimming. His head was lying on one arm at the edge of the pool, his body floating lazily behind.

John dropped his towel on a lounger and, bare footed to the edge next to his brother. Folding himself into a seated position he dropped his feet to dangle in the cool water.

“Gordon?”

“Hmm?” His head rose a little blearily. “Oh, John, hey.”

“Merry Christmas.”

“Huh? What, oh, Merry Christmas, John.”

A frown. “You okay?”

Gordon flexed his shoulders. “Yeah, just thinking.”

“Virgil?”

“Yeah.”

John sighed. “Same. But you do know he’s okay?”

“Yeah, just thinking it through.”

John pushed himself into the water and couldn’t help a relieved sigh as the water took away so many of the effects of gravity, cradling his body. “Swim with me?”

Brown eyes turned to him and John saw a reflection of his own worry in their depths. “Sure.” Gordon pushed off from the edge, his movements graceful despite his distraction.

John moved to the lane next to Gordon’s preferred and lined up beside his fish brother. Gordon shot him a brief but grateful smile before pushing off the end in a careless surge into stroke. He was metres ahead before John had even shifted into form.

Typical.

Show off.

But he couldn’t help but smile as he pushed off the edge himself, automatically moving into a strong but leisurely stroke in warm up.

Swimming denied verbal communication, but it wasn’t needed, the two of them just keeping each other company.

By the fifth lap, John started pushing himself, putting his body through the exercise needed to keep it healthy. He had no delusions of keeping up with Gordon. He just paced himself as his body needed it. Twenty laps in, he eased up a little and checked on his brother.

Gordon was still going. John brought himself to a halt, treading water, muscles pleasantly buzzing.

“Hey, John.” The astronaut startled, turning in place to find Scott standing on the edge of the pool. His running gear appeared well used, sweat stains prominent, and he was still breathing heavily. “Just letting you know that I’m going to be taking One out in about half an hour.”

“You going to get Mel and Sam?” Gordon was suddenly beside him. It was a sign of how tired John actually was that his younger brother startled him almost as much as Scott had a moment earlier.

“Yeah.”

“Can I come with?”

“Don’t you want to be here for when Penny arrives?”

John arched an eyebrow in Gordon’s direction. The fish had been looking forward to Christmas for that very reason. Before Virgil’s illness, it had been Penelope this, Penelope that. Apparently, he had the ‘best’ gift lined up for their first Christmas as a couple. Whether or not that was still going ahead considering recent events, John had no idea. Gordon hadn’t mentioned it since Virgil fell ill.

“I thought you had the fastest plane on the planet, Scotty.”

Their eldest brother snorted. “Plane, yes, younger brother, no.”

“Hey, I can be fast.” A strawberry blond frown. “Regardless, I need to speak to Sam.”

Scott eyed him a moment. “Virgil?”

Gordon sighed. “Yeah, Virgil. Gotta handle this delicately.”

Scott’s lips thinned. “Okay, then you better be ready in thirty because that’s when I’m leaving.”

The fish was already climbing out of the pool. Wet footprints marked the concrete as he strode to his towel.

Blue eyes turned to John. “You okay? You look tired.”

John let water run through his fingers. “I am, but I’ll live.”

Voice quiet. “Virgil?”

A single nod, voice equally quiet. “Virgil. Eos, Gordon and I will work it out. We just need time.” And patience. Admittedly, he didn’t have much of that where his brothers’ health was concerned. He could fake it, but it didn’t mean he felt it.

Scott’s expression was thoughtful. “I know you will do your best. Don’t forget to look after yourself.”

A groan. This was why Virgil was always adamant that he was fine. I single hint of something wrong and their biggest brother was all over them, his concern obvious. “I’m fine, Scott.”

That earned him a grunt and John actually struggled not to smile at his brother’s exasperation. John swam to the pool edge and pushed himself out of the water. A wave in the direction of the rising sun’s reflection. “The pool is all yours, dear brother.”

Scott eyed him. “Thank you.”

The morning breeze cooled John enough to raise goose pimples on his arms. Before he could reach for his towel, Scott was handing it to him.

Ever the big brother. It was John’s turn to eye him back. “Thank you.”

Scott smiled at him, a definite smirk on those lips. He knew exactly what John was thinking and had likely done it on purpose. “Anytime.”

Hmmm. “Merry Christmas, Scott.”

Those blue eyes widened as his big brother obviously realised that despite all the preparations underway, despite the tree they had stacked with presents the night before, he had still managed to forget the significance of the day.

It was John’s turn to smirk.

But Scott recovered quickly, tilting his head, a small smile on his lips. “Merry Christmas, John.”

With that he turned and headed off into the house.

-o-o-o-

Alan loved to sleep in. He shared this love with his second eldest brother. Getting up early sucked big time and he had no coffee addiction to help him.

But there was one day of the year when you could witness the youngest Tracy out of bed, while not early, at least a decent time where breakfast could still be called breakfast and not lunch or even brunch.

Christmas Day.

Alan adored the day. Presents, food and family, what more could a guy ask for?

So, eight am found him stumbling down the stairs to the kitchen in search of the second and third items on the list. He found Grandma at the kitchen table eating her fruit and yoghurt.

Alan made no effort to be quiet, but she didn’t appear to realise he was there, staring out across the lagoon. “Grandma?”

She dropped her spoon with a clatter as it hit the bowl. “Alan!” She clutched her hand to her chest, gasping. “You frightened me. Gave my old heart a kick in the pants.”

“Sorry, Grandma. Are you okay?”

“This time. Though I wouldn’t recommend doing it too often.” She held out an arm. “C’mere and give me a Christmas hug.”

Now that was something he was quite happy to do. Grandma hugs were always appreciated. “Merry Christmas, Grandma.” He held her tight.

“Merry Christmas, honey. Are you hungry?”

Uh, that was always a loaded question and there were important indicators related to that. “Where is everyone?” He had expected to find at least John down here. His space brother would eat his breakfast staring out into the lagoon and follow it with work on his tablet just to be around family in his own way. But not today.

“Scott and Gordon have gone to Raoul to collect Ms Fisher and that scientist friend of Gordon’s.”

“Sam?”

“I guess. They were both in quite a hurry to leave.”

That set Alan grinning. “I think Scott likes Mel.”

An arched eyebrow. “I thought she liked Virgil.”

A snort accompanied the grin. “I don’t think she is Virgil’s kind of girl.”

Of course, that was the very moment Kayo decided to enter the kitchen. She had obviously been on a run, dressed in shorts and a high cut top.

“Who’s Virgil’s kind of girl?”

Alan’s eyes widened. “Um.”

Green narrowed at him. “What are you up to, Alan?”

“Nothing!” He held out his hands. “What did I do?”

“I’m more concerned with what you are going to do.”

“Suspicious, much? I’m going to eat breakfast, that’s what.”

She continued to eye him. “No practical jokes today.”

“I wasn’t planning on it. Gee, you’d think I was Gordy or something.”

“Gordon will be contained by Lady Penelope. You, however, are not.”

“And what? That makes me some kind of prank genius?”

“Genius, no, annoyance, yes.”

“Hey, Merry Christmas, Kayo. How about a little of the spirit?”

She glared and him and grunted before turning away and stalking off.

“What’s up her skirt?”

“Alan!”

“Well, you saw her. I didn’t do anything!”

Grandma was quiet a moment. “She has things on her mind.”

“When doesn’t she?”

“Let her be.”

“I didn’t do anything!”

Grandma sighed. “Things will work themselves out for the best.”

Alan stared at his grandmother. What on Earth was going on? Did everyone know something that he didn’t. He sighed. Wouldn’t be the first time. “I’m going grab some breakfast.”

“Yes, dear.” And Grandma was staring out at the lagoon again.

What the-?

Alan grabbed the refrigerator door and flung it open, his eyes raking its contents. Perhaps food would fix things.

A glance at Grandma found that she hadn’t moved.

There was definitely something going on.

-o-o-o-

End Day 5 Part 1

#thunderbirds are go #thunderbirds fanfiction #thunderbirds #Virgil Tracy #Gordon Tracy #Scott Tracy #John Tracy #Alan Tracy #Grandma Tracy #kermadec fic

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chemicalcindercat · 3 years

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Frisk freed the monsters from the underground, completing a true-pacifist run. She was living happily on the surface with her monster family. Everything was perfect. Until it wasn't. When Frisk gets hit by a car on her way over to Sans house, everything changes. Not only does Frisk forget herself, her friends, and all of her adventures in the Underground, but something else has changed. Frisk glitches the Multiverse.

Chapter Summary: Frisk did not expect to have this many “best friends”.

Chapters (8/?): 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8

Fandom: Undertale

Rating: T (For violence and hints of adult themes)

Relationships: Sans x Frisk, Underfell Sans x Frisk, Underswap Papyrus x Chara, Slight Underswap Sans x Frisk

Additional Tags: Amnesia, Lost memories, Hurt/Comfort, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, ...Have I mentioned there is Hurt/Comfort?, Hurt, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Goat Mom is best mom (Undertale), King Fluffy-Buns - Freeform, Sad Asgore (Undertale), Female Frisk (Undertale), Aged up Frisk (Undertale), Like duh she’s an adult i’m not a pedo, gross, Verbal Frisk, Frisk has a voice in her head, Sans is a depressed bean, Papyrus is so innocent, Frisk glitched the multiverse, oh whoops, spoiler alert, more tags will be added as we progress

"Well, Ms. Dreemurr, it would appear you have a mild case of Amnesia." The doctor said, flipping the pages on his clipboard. "You hit your head pretty hard when that car slammed into you. You're lucky it isn't worse." He looked at the worried couple standing in the corner of the room. "Her memories should be back by the end of the week. We'll keep her here for tonight, but tomorrow she can go home. She doesn't have any broken ribs, or really anything wrong except for the memory loss, which is practically unheard of for an incident like this. But anyways," The doctor turned back to the confused girl laying in the hospital bed. "If you need anything, just hit the buzzer on the bed next to you." And with that he left the room.

As soon as the doctor was gone, the couple turned to look at the girl. They were strange, the girl could tell. She couldn't remember anything past 10 minutes ago, when she woke up, but something told her that goats weren't usually able to walk, talk, and be, well, normal people.

"Um...Frisk, are you feeling well?" The woman asked, worried. The girl thought for a moment. Was she feeling fine? She honestly didn't know. How could you know if you were feeling fine, when you didn't know what fine was? She didn't know if fine for her was everything being perfect, or terrible. So instead of answering the question, she answered with a question of her own.

"'Frisk'? Is...Is that my name?"

The woman looked like she was about to break down in tears, so the man took over. "Yes, dear, that's your name. Frisk. Do you really not remember anything?" Frisk shook her head. "Well, uh...I-"

"She's your 'mom', Toriel, who you live with; He's your 'dad', Asgore, who you don't. They're divorced, you're adopted, and I'm Flowey, your 'best friend'." Frisk jumped. She had forgotten about the flower on the desk next to her that could talk.

"N-now, Asriel, that's no way to-"

"My name is Flowey." The flower corrected. Okay, Frisk was confused, to say the least. What in Asgore's name were they talking about? Before she could ask, the door slammed open, a blue fish-woman entering, with a yellow lizard-woman following behind nervously.

"Frisk!" Yelled the fish-girl, running over to the hospital bed. "We heard what happened! Are you okay? How are you feeling? Did you break anything? Because that would be cool and yet suck all at the same time. Did you finish Mew Mew: Kissy Cutie? Are you-"

"U-undyne, M-maybe we shouldn't b-bombard her with s-so many questions at o-once? Her head p-probably hurts." The lizard girl interrupted. Undyne looked at her, before looking back at Frisk.

"Oh my Asgore, I'm sorry! Are you okay? Does your head hurt? Are you-"

"Undyne, Frisk has amnesia." Toriel announced. Both Undyne and Alphys turned to look at her.

"What??" They said in unison.

"Y-you mean… Y-you don't remember us? You d-don't know who we a-are?" Alphys asked, walking over to Frisk. The human girl simply shook her head.

"I...I don't remember anything. And no, I don't know who you are. Who are you?" She asked.

"We're your anime pals!" Undyne said, putting her arm around Alphys' shoulder and grinning. Alphys blushed.

"E-every T-Tuesday you come over t-to our house and w-watch anime with us." Alphys explained. "T-this week, the newest season of M-Mew Mew: Kissy C-Cutie is airing, a-and we were going t-to watch it together. You r-really don't remember?"

Frisk looked down at her hands sadly. "No...I don't...I'm sorry."

Toriel came over and hugged Frisk. "It's okay, my child. There is no need to apologize. Do not blame yourself, child; There is nothing you can do. The doctor said by the end of the week, you'll remember, and I'm sure he is right. All we have to do is wait."

Frisk wasn't sure how she felt about this woman she couldn't remember hugging her, but she decided she kind of liked it. Besides, the lady seemed to need it more than Frisk did. Before Frisk could say anything, the lady stepped back, and the door slammed open again. At this point, Frisk was surprised it hadn't fallen off it's hinges. This time, there were two skeletons who entered the room. One was really tall, as tall as Undyne and Asgore, with a red scarf. He was also carrying what appeared to be a plate of home cooked spaghetti. The other one had a blue hoodie, and was shorter, maybe even shorter than Frisk. Once she thought about it, Frisk realized she didn't know how tall she was; She hadn't stood up yet. Would she even remember how to walk? She started panicking, wondering how she would remember to do normal, everyday stuff.

Calm down, Said a voice in her head. Quit panicking about everything.

Before Frisk could respond, the tall skeleton came over and set the plate down on the desk beside her.

"HERE YOU GO, HUMAN! THE GREAT PAPYRUS HAS MADE YOU SOME YUMMY SPAGHETTI!! FEEL FREE TO EAT IT WHENEVER YOU FEEL LIKE IT, FOR IT WILL SURELY BE THE BEST! NYEH HEH HEH!" He yelled, and Frisk winced a little, not expecting it. She smiled softly at him, not knowing who he was.

I sure did have a lot of friends. She thought.

Yeah, no kidding. Said the voice in her head.

...I just wish I could remember them…

The smaller skeleton pushed past the bigger one, with a nervous grin on his face. "how ya feelin', kiddo?" He asked, his voice surprisingly deep compared to the other skeleton.

"Um...well...I-"

"NONSENSE, BROTHER. WHY ASK HOW SHE IS FEELING WHEN SHE'S IN THE HOSPITAL?" The tall skeleton interrupted. Frisk couldn't believe it. Were they really brothers? They were so different! The skeleton turned towards her. "BUT DON'T WORRY, HUMAN. I'M SURE MY SPAGHETTI WILL MAKE YOU FEEL BETTER IN NO TIME!"

"yeah, kid, eat up. boneappetite." The shorter one said. The bigger one groaned.

"UGH, SANS, DO YOU HAVE TO MAKE PUNS RIGHT NOW? YOU MIGHT GIVE THE HUMAN A HEADACHE!"

"nah, look at her, paps. she likes it, you should know that by now, ya numbskull." Oh, so I like puns? That's good to know. Even as Frisk thought this, she could immediately tell it was true. When Sans (was that his name?) made a pun, she had struggled not to laugh.

"BROTHER!!" The taller skeleton protested. "WHETHER SHE LIKES IT OR NOT, A HOSPITAL IS HARDLY THE PLACE TO MAKE PUNS!" He yelled.

"geez, paps, who broke your funny bone?" The shorter one asked, winking at Frisk and stepping closer to her. Something inside of her pulled, and she could tell that he was really close to her. "so anyways, bucko, how're you feeling?" He asked softer, so that only she would hear.

"Well, I just-"

"Heya Papyrus, how're you doing?" Asked Undyne, throwing her arm around the taller skeleton's shoulder. "I know the situation isn't the best, with Frisk and all, but are you still up for some training today?"

"YOU BET, UNDYNE!" Papyrus said loudly. "AS LONG AS THE HUMAN IS ALRIGHT, THAT IS! THE GREAT PAPYRUS MUST BE THE BEST FRIEND EVER, AND A GOOD FRIEND WOULD TAKE CARE OF HER!"

"You're right, Papyrus, but I'm her best friend! Remember?" Undyne argued.

"SUUUUUURE, YOU CAN BELIEVE THAT IF YOU WANT, BUT IT'S WRONG!"

"Guys, I-" Frisk was interrupted by Flowey, suddenly defensive.

"Whatever, you idiots can pretend that she likes you better, but I'm obviously her BeSt FrIeNd!" Flowey claimed, in a demonic voice that sent a shiver down Frisk's spine. Suddenly everyone started talking all at once, Undyne and Papyrus still arguing over Frisk, Flowey hissing at everyone, Alphys nervously asking Asgore how he's been, Toriel joining in the conversation. All of the noise, and all of the new information was really giving Frisk a migraine. She sank deeper under her blanket, trying to block everything out.

Someone grabbed Frisk's hand, and she immediately jumped and yanked her hand back, to see Sans with a look of confusion and hurt. It quickly faded back into his normal smile.

"so, kid, what is it you've been trying to say this whole time?" He asked. Frisk gulped nervously as he leaned closer to her, and she leaned away from him a bit. Doesn't this guy know anything about personal space??

"I...Well, uh...Who are you, exactly?" Frisk asked.

Everyone immediately stopped talking and turned to Frisk.

The pupils in Sans' eyes disappeared, leaving two empty eye sockets, a look of pure shock. For a couple of moments, nobody dared to say anything.

"WHAT DO YOU MEAN, HUMAN?" Papyrus asked, being the first to break the silence. "'WHO ARE WE?' IT IS I, THE GREAT PAPYRUS, AND MY BROTHER SANS, YOUR-"

"frisk, what did the doctor say? what…wh...you...you really don't remember me? remember us? anything?" Sans asked, his pupils returning and studying Frisk closely.

All Frisk could do was shake her head.

"I… I have amnesia."

Before anyone could say anything, Sans was gone.

#update #fanfic #Amnesia #frans #amnesia frans #angst #and so THE PLOT THICKENS #heh #we’re just getting started >:)#mwahahaHAHAHAHA

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today-only-happens-once · 5 years

Text

With Great Power - Chapter 5

Title: With Great Power – Chapter 5

Catch up (or read on AO3) here!

Fic summary: Thomas Sanders is just a regular social media personality. But when he gets bit by a spider during filming one of his YouTube videos, his whole life is about to turn upside down—whether he (or the aspects of his personality) want it to or not. Platonic LAMP/CALM + Character!Thomas. Spider-Man AU.

Chapter word count: 3,515

Chapter warnings: cursing, nightmare mention, anxiety mention, minor spoilers for Danny Phantom.

A/N: Almost a month later, here’s chapter 5! So sorry for the delay. I hope you enjoy it! <3 Shoutout to @creativenostalgiastuff for her help as always. Edited by yours truly so all mistakes are mine.

Tags: @captain-loki-xavier, @human-dictionary, @the-peculiar-bi-tch, @mining-pup, @band-be-boss-blog, @asexual-trashbag, @samathekittycat, @why-should-i-tell-youu2, @theobsessor1, @always3charcoaltea, @changeling-ash, @logical-princey, @crimsonshadow323, @flickering-raven, @smokeyrutilequartz, @dontbugmeimantisocial, @liz-a-bell, @black-king-white-knight, @soijusthavetoask, @analogical-mess, @marvelfangeek09, @vigilantvirgil, @princelogical

Sorry for the delay, everyone! Thomas types out for Twitter, a couple days later. Wasn’t feeling great but we’re back at it! New CT coming to you soon!

He pauses, then looks up at Joan across from him, sitting on a chair in Picani’s office. “Hey, what if we did a livestream tomorrow?”

He still feels bad for having gone MIA for a week. Or, as MIA as Thomas ever really went. He’d texted Joan, Camden, and Talyn basically every day to tell them he still wasn’t feeling his best. It wasn’t… a total lie, he’d told himself despite the guilt that sat uncomfortably in his stomach. It definitely hadn’t helped that he’d consequentially been postponing finishing up the filming of Cartoon Therapy due to his absence. It had been a couple of weeks now without any video to post on either channel.

Joan looks up from laptop poised across their lap. “Uh, I can do that. As long as it ends before 6, ‘cause my piano lesson starts at 6:30.”

Thomas smiles. “Perfect. I just feel bad for making them wait, y’know?” To make up for it, he adds to the tweet, we’ll be having a Livestream tomorrow at 4! Open to everyone, not just members. Hope to see you all there!

“You can’t help that you got sick,” Joan replies as Thomas sends the tweet out. “They understand.”

“Yeah, but… y’know.” Thomas lifts a shoulder. “I just wanna do something for them.”

“It’s cool, man,” Joan replies. “I think it’s a good idea. And it’ll give us a nice break from the editing and shit.”

“Speaking of—” Thomas grabs the pen and journal prompts from the bookcase behind him—"how’s Camden handling his part of things? I haven’t talked to him about the vid in a while.”

“I think he’s almost done,” Joan replies. “We just gotta finish the last of Picani and we should have the rest of the footage he needs to finish his section.”

Thomas nods and adjusts the knot in the pastel green tie around his neck. It had seemed like every time they’d tried to film the rest of Picani, something got in the way. Thomas loved acting and he loved the filming stage of videos, but a small part of him just wanted to be done with it. The sooner he could be done filming, the sooner he could focus on… more pressing issues.

“Then let’s finish Picani,” Thomas says lightly. “We’ve just got the last scene with Valerie’s character, right?”

Joan nods. “Yep. Shouldn’t take long at all.”

“Awesome.” Thomas glances in the viewfinder and pushes the bangs that were falling into his eyes out of the way. “Ready when you are.”

Joan hits record on the camera, then looks down at their script. “I have to be the adult, y’know?”

Thomas taps his pen against his mouth, looking carefully at Valerie’s sightline. “You know, Elena… Danny’s older sister feels that way for much of the show, too.”

“What do you mean?”

“Well, Jazz is only a couple of years older than Danny. But she often feels like she has to be the adult in the family because she sees her parents as a bit… immature.” Thomas leans forward slightly. “So she acts way older than she really is. But that mentality ends up backfiring on her when she takes it a little too far.”

“Too far?”

Thomas places his pen on top of his journal in his lap. “In Season 2 Epsiode 7, Danny has to fight a ghost that can only be seen by kids while he’s on vacation with his family. Since Jazz acts and thinks of herself as an adult even though she’s only 16, she can’t see the ghost and starts to think—along with her parents—that Danny is going crazy.” Thomas pauses, remembering that they’d wanted to cut in with a video clip there. Then he continues. “Though her concern is well-intentioned, it leads her to trapping Danny and the ghost goes after their parents. It’s not until Danny is able to get Jazz to act like a kid again that she’s able to see the ghost, and ultimately help to save her family.”

Joan rolls their eyes to keep in character as they read Valerie’s lines. “Fine, but my family’s not under attack by ghosts.”

Thomas sighs. “You’re right. But the point is that Jazz thought acting like an adult was helping the people around her, when it really wasn’t. When she actually started acting her age was when she was able to be the most help—especially to her little brother, who was the whole reason she’d been acting so much older in the first place.”

“Huh…”

“From that point on,” Thomas continues, “Jazz tries to find a balance. She’s a mature person, and nobody was asking her to change that. But she also comes to understand the importance of still being a kid. She learns how to balance the two in a way that doesn’t ask her to sacrifice any part of who she is.”

Joan pauses. “I… guess I could try that. Maria isn’t a little kid anymore, even though I still think of her as my baby sister.”

Thomas gives a small, encouraging smile. “It’ll take some time. Learning balance is not as easy as flipping a switch. But it’s something we can continue to work on. It might even help your relationship with your sister in ways you don’t expect.”

Joan gives a single nod. “I’d like that.”

“Great!” Thomas grins. “So I’ll see you next week?”

“Definitely. And… thanks, Dr. Picani.”

“Any time, Elena.”

…

“We can tell them. Should we tell them? We can tell them. I think. Wait…”

Thomas laughs as Joan stumbles through their thoughts about half an hour in to the livestream. He laughs even harder when he sees the chat blowing up with people asking Joan to just say it already. They’d decided to go back to Thomas’s apartment for the livestream, if only for sake of tradition. Not every livestream had been from this location, but Thomas wanted some of the normalcy back. And Joan, though they’d seemed puzzled, didn’t appear to mind.

“I’m good to tell them who it is,” Thomas says.

“Wait, who as in the…” Joan arches an eyebrow. “Or…” They tilt their head. Perhaps strangely enough, Thomas knows exactly what they’re asking.

He laughs again. “Real name, not the character name.”

“Yeah, okay. That’s what I was thinking.” Thomas and Joan both look back at the camera.

“It’s Valerie,” Thomas says. “The new character we’re introducing is played by my friend, Valerie. Some of you probably know her, since she’s been in… a good number of our videos. We got really lucky that the schedules worked out, since she’s auditioning in Orlando at the moment.”

“Yeah, she’s actually been in a lot,” Joan says. They start counting on their fingers. “Reasons to Smile.”

“On the Spot in the Spotlight,” Thomas supplies. “Which we’re still planning on bringing back.”

“The first Tongue Twisted.” Joan snaps their fingers and points at him. “She’s been in a few of your shorts videos, too.”

“I feel like we’re missing something.” Thomas glances at the chat and smiles at the people shouting SANDERS SIDES in all caps. “That’s right! Goodness gracious, she was in two of the Sanders Sides videos.” He shakes his head. “Sorry, guys. Guess I’m still a little out of it.”

He manages a small, apologetic smile. But a moment later, there’s a flood of messages in the chat telling him not to worry, asking if he’s feeling better, reminding him to rest and drink water… he feels a sharp twist of guilt. He tries not to linger on it.

“Let’s see… other questions….” He watches the chat closely, the knot in his stomach loosening slightly as the messages filter from well wishes to questions again. One of them makes him frown. “Someone’s asking if I’ve seen the Ekko videos?” He glances over his shoulder towards Joan. “I haven’t. Is that a new thing? I don’t know if I’ve heard of them.”

Joan looks suddenly uncomfortable. They shrug, but its awkward and forced. “Yeah. It was all anyone was talking about a couple days ago.”

Thomas hadn’t been checking social media over the past week. A part of him felt relieved that they’d at least moved on from trying to identify who “Spider-Man” was. “What are they?”

Joan gives him a quick look. “I’ll… tell you after the livestream.” Thomas couldn’t quite read their expression, but there was a warning look in their eyes that made him nod his agreement. Whatever it was, Joan didn’t want to talk about it with an audience. They wanted to change the subject.

At Thomas’s nod, Joan leans forward to read the scrolling chat feed until they find a different question. Thomas glances at the screen as well, and sees a few questions with “Spider-Man” in them—they go too fast for him to identify what exactly they’re asking—and feels himself tense. Joan doesn’t seem to even notice the questions.

“Here’s one,” they say after a brief pause. “Thomas, if you could be any kitchen appliance, what would you be?”

As the livestream continues, Thomas finds himself falling into old, comforting habits. He’d always had fun doing livestreams, especially ones with Joan. He appreciated their ability to be thoughtful and intellectual one moment and crack a joke that would make Thomas’s stomach hurt from laughing the next. A part of him feels like he appreciates it now more than ever. Joan is his best friend, and he can tell them anything.

Well… almost.

The idea of telling them about the recent… abilities Thomas had come to acquire made his stomach squirm and his heartbeat quicken. He couldn’t quite explain why. Joan would probably be skeptical—even Thomas hadn’t believed it at first—but the powers were something he could prove, a voice that sounded an awful lot like Logan reminded him. He’d been proving his abilities to himself all week, after all. Maybe he knew there was a chance that Joan would freak out and never talk to him again. They wouldn’t do that. The thought sounds like Patton.

Even so, something whispers safer to not tell them in the back of his mind, and Thomas can’t help but believe it.

“I gotta go soon,” Joan says. They look at Thomas. “Should we end with Mind Meld or something?”

Thomas pushes his bangs out of his eyes. He smiles. “Yeah, let’s do it.” Thomas pauses, thinking of his first word. “Okay. Ready?”

“Yeah.”

“3. 2. 1. Giant,” Thomas chimes at the same time that Joan says, “Apple.”

Thomas laughs. “Giant and apple?” He makes a face. “I don’t even know where to go with that.”

Joan grins in amusement, then thinks. “Okay. I think I have one. Super and apple.”

Thomas stares at them in uncertainty before he gets an idea. “Okay. I do too. It’s kinda weird, though.”

“3. 2. 1. Honeycrisp,” Joan says at the same time Thomas spits out, “New York.”

“I was thinking like, a giant apple. New York?” Joan laughs. It makes Thomas laugh too.

“I was thinking like, ‘giant as in ‘big’ and then—”

“And then you went to Big Apple,” Joan finishes. “Okay. I kind of get that. Honeycrisp and New York. Uh.”

Thomas’s eyes widen as he frantically tries to think of some sort of connection before one occurs to him. “Okay! I think I got one. It’s… broad-ish?”

“Broadish?” Joan starts laughing again. “That’s very helpful.”

“Okay, like,” Thomas waves a hand. “Kinda broad.”

Joan furrows their brow before shrugging. “What the heck. 3. 2. 1.”

Thomas says ‘vendor’ and Joan says ‘food’. It takes another round before they both eventually end up saying ‘restaurant’. Thomas grins when they finally get there. He looks back at the camera.

“Took us a minute but we got there! Thanks for sticking around, guys. This was a lot of fun. Super glad we had the chance to do this.” He glances at the chat, laughing at all the reactions of people playing along. In the midst of the messages—some of them now transitioning to sweet goodbyes—he sees one that catches his eye.

oof after that ekko vid I could use a new reasons to smile

Something uncomfortable sits in Thomas’s chest, but he flashes a quick smile at the camera. “Love you all! Bye!”

He stops the livestream and closes his laptop. Joan sits back in their chair, the spark of amusement from the game of mind meld fades out of their eyes. He’s reminded suddenly of the solemn, uncomfortable look Joan had given him when he’d asked during the livestream about whatever the ‘Ekko video’ was about.

“I saw that message. I know what you’re thinking,” Joan chimes in quietly after a moment. “It’s… not something you really wanna watch, dude. Trust me.”

“Why?”

Joan sighs and reaches for their water bottle. “It’s just… this thing that freaked everyone out. I don’t know how to explain it, but Talyn had nightmares after they watched it.” They take a drink. “I think it’s just someone trying to get some attention. The best thing to do is probably not to give it to them, y’know?”

Thomas nods absently as Joan pushes back from the table and heads towards the kitchen. Talyn didn’t really spook easily. They played horror games for fun in the dark alone. Thomas had never really been that kind of person. But he can’t deny that he’s curious. A part of him does want to know, if only out of a morbid kind of curiosity of what could have that kind of impact on his friends. Even though Joan had talked about Talyn’s reaction, it was clear to Thomas that it had bothered them too.

Dishes clatter in the sink as Joan sets the water bottle they’d borrowed from Thomas amongst the plates and bowls that Thomas hadn’t gotten around to cleaning yet. Neither of them said anything, letting the whir of the AC unit fill the uncomfortable silence between them. Something about it had gotten under Joan’s skin. Something they weren’t telling Thomas.

Thomas opens his mouth to ask them about it when Joan interrupts him suddenly. “I don’t know, man. It was weird and it felt like a warning of some sort. Maybe that’s why Talyn and I both felt a little paranoid after we watched it.” Their dark eyes flicker up to Thomas as they turn from the sink to look at him through the cut out opening above the counter into the living room. “I just don’t really want to dwell on it.”

Thomas caves and nods. “Okay.”

“But if you want to do another Reasons to Smile, that might be fun. A few people in the chat were suggesting it. Maybe that’d be a good idea.” They cross back into the living room and grabs their jacket from the back of the chair.

“Sure,” Thomas says, still a little lost in his thoughts. What could be so bad about that video? “Yeah, I’ll reach out to Camden and the team and whoever is in town to see if they might wanna join in. Maybe I can get Lee or Mary Lee to join this time.”

“Cool.” Joan stops after they’ve pulled their jacket on. Thomas can feel their gaze on him. “You okay?”

Thomas blinks and shakes his head to clear it. “Yeah. Just worried,” he says honestly. He offers a faint smile. “You and Talyn don’t usually get freaked out easily.”

Joan gives him a look. “We have anxiety,” they deadpan teasingly. Thomas huffs a laugh, even though it does little to expel the tightness in his chest. Joan sighs softly. “Really, Thomas. We’re okay.”

Thomas nods again. “Okay.”

“I gotta run,” Joan says, sounding faintly apologetic. “I’m gonna be late for my lesson.”

Thomas gives them a smile that he hopes is reassuring. “Go. Love you.”

“Love you too.” Joan closes the door behind them.

…

Thomas slips his phone into the back pocket of his jeans and cranes his neck up towards the night sky. It’s little late to be posting the Sunday Shout-Out video, but he liked the nighttime. The parking lot is empty except for his car, and even though he knows he ought to just go home given the hour, a part of him wants to stay out just a little longer.

Thomas sighs and jumps up on the trunk of his car and sits. He fold his hands behind his head and leans back against the windshield, looking up at the stars. Most of them are drowned out by the streetlights that illuminate the lot, but Thomas doesn’t mind. A cool breeze plays with the ends of his hair. It’s calming.

Thomas sighs and closes his eyes.

“I really ought to insist that you go home before too much longer, Thomas.”

The internet personality smiles faintly at the sound of his Logical Side’s voice. He cracks an eye open to find Logan standing beside the car, his arms crossed over his chest and an eyebrow cocked. Thomas’s lips curl up in a faint smile.

“I know, Logan.”

“If you know, then why do you appear to be falling asleep in the middle of an abandoned parking lot?”

Thomas sits up. “I wasn’t falling asleep.”

Logan hums, seemingly unconvinced. “All the same. Optimal rest is necessary for you to maintain a healthy lifestyle.”

“I know.” Thomas shakes his head a little, still smiling, and leans back again. “But this is nice.”

“This?” Thomas can hear the skepticism and confusion in Logan’s voice and tries not to laugh.

“Yes,” Thomas replies. He shifts over. “Take a seat. Try it out for yourself.”

There’s a brief pause, and Thomas isn’t sure whether or not Logan is going to take him up on the offer. Then Logan climbs up on the car, mirroring Thomas’s position beside him except for the folding his hands across his stomach rather than behind his head. Thomas smiles again. He’s a little surprised, although he supposes he shouldn’t be. Logan was the part of him that sought to learn, after all. And if Logan didn’t understand the appeal of something, he could usually be convinced to try it at least once.

“See?” Thomas says after a moment. “It’s nice.”

Logan doesn’t reply right away. “Perhaps.”

“The whole day was kind of nice, actually,” Thomas continues. He lets his eyes drift closed again. “It felt… normal.”

“Normal is a widely subjective term, Thomas.”

“Normal for me, I mean.” He takes in a deep breath of the night air. “Filming, livestreaming, hanging out with Joan. I think maybe I needed that. I needed a day to just be… normal again. Maybe not everything has to change, y’know?”

Logan doesn’t say anything. Thomas feels him shift beside him and he cracks an eye open. Logan is looking up at the sky. The streetlights reflect off the lens of his glasses. A short gust of wind tugs at the end of his stiped tie. There’s something in his expression that Thomas can’t quite read.

He doesn’t dwell on it. Thomas follows Logan’s gaze back up to the sky. “Do you remember,” Thomas asks, “when I was like, seven and wanted to be an astronaut?”

“Yes,” Logan replies. “I do remember that. It was an aspiration that lasted for nearly a full year.”

Thomas glances over at him. “Do you wish I still wanted that?”

Logan adjusts the frame of his glasses before folding his hands across his stomach again. “I don’t believe it’s that simple. I was more than content at your chosen field, Thomas, short-lived as your use of it may have been.”

“You’re talking about chemical engineering.”

“Indeed.” Logan is still looking up at the sky above them. “Although, such fields of study have many unexpected benefits. Perhaps it will prove useful yet.”

The corner of Thomas’s lips curls up in a faint smile. “Perhaps,” he says, echoing Logan from a moment ago. A comfortable silence settles between them. For all the times that Logan and Thomas had been at odds with each other, he’d never doubted that Logan was doing his best to look out for him, just like all of them always did. Most of the time, Thomas found Logan’s company a quiet kind of grounding. Calming. Tonight was no exception to that.

Thomas listens to the crickets and sound of distant car tires rolling on pavement for a long moment. His eyes drift shut again.

“You are getting tired,” Logan says softly, moments before Thomas was about to fall asleep. “I really must insist that you go home to ensure your safety.”

Thomas blinks his eyes open and sits up. He scrubs a hand across his eyes, bangs falling across his face in the process, and smiles tiredly at Logan as the Logical Side sits up beside him.

“You got it, Logan.” He pauses, the smile a little. “And… thanks.”

…

#sanders sides #sanders sides fanfiction #spider-man au #sanders sides spider-man au #platonic lamp/calm #character!thomas #with great power #wgp #wgp fic #tw cursing #tw nightmare mention #tw anxiety mention

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xwaywardhuntress · 5 years

Text

Family Don’t End In Blood (Part Two)

Summary: Do mistakes make us bad? The plan to deal with Jack.

Pairings: Dean x reader

Warnings: Season 14 finale spoilers.

Word Count: 1500+

Disclaimer: I do not own Supernatural. This is fanfiction only. Please do not redistribute my writings on other sites, horrible or not. Thanks!

Part One

Finding Jack had become a priority to everyone after Mary’s small post hunter funeral gathering, all for different reasons. Dean wanted to find Jack to get some sort of revenge for his mother. Castiel wanted to find Jack to talk to him as he still believed in the Nephilim. Sam wanted to find Jack before Bobby and his crew found him. Then there was Y/N who was more worried about the conflicts within Team Free Will itself.

It was obvious to her that everyone was not seeing eye-to-eye. Castiel had left to go to heaven to see if he could ask the remaining angels for help. Y/N was very doubtful they would be of any help, but she knew Castiel was trying his best to find Jack first before anyone else. When the angel came back with the news that heaven would help to locate Jack, everyone was skeptical about it.

As if timed perfectly, Sam had found articles where a man who wrote lies and rejected God was found dead by being turned into a statue of salt and then an accused fake health healing woman died from being swallowed up by the ground. Deaths that referenced something “Biblical” according to Castiel. There could only be one responsible. Jack.

After finding a ‘biblical’ case that didn’t lead to an immediate death concerning a pastor being consumed by worms, the team had left to visit the cursed man.

At the hospital, the idea of being consumed by worms was disgusting. Y/N found herself unable to stomach it and the odor that came from the man as she found herself waiting outside of the hospital room. It didn’t take too long till the boys had exited out of the room that held the worm man.

“Sorry about earlier. The smell was just so strong and gross.” Y/N apologized. “What did y’all find out though?”

“The guy confirmed it was Jack and he said Jack had told him he was carrying out heaven’s orders.” Sam explained.

Everyone turned to Castiel. The angel knew what they had all been thinking. “I’ll go to heaven and find out what’s happening.” He said.

The boys and Y/N agreed to let Cas look into it as they headed back to the bunker.

Arriving back at the bunker, Y/N could not stop thinking about the smell and the idea of worms crawling out of human skin. “I’m going to go shower.” She said shivering at the thoughts as she began heading to her and Dean’s room.

Dean smiled back at her, nodding his head. When Y/N was out of view, that’s when he turned to his brother with the plan he had thought of earlier. The plan to stop Jack once and for all.

The shower had felt great. Y/N walked out to the bunker war room, expecting to see the boys, only to find it empty. Sam’s laptop had been open on the table and not locked, which meant she probably just missed them. The younger Winchester would never leave his laptop open and unlocked due to the fact that Y/N and Dean could not be trusted with it. Dean would download porn and Y/N was known to mess with the computer settings just for fun. As tempting as it was to mess with Sam’s laptop, she decided she’d leave his laptop alone as she turned around to begin walking through the bunker halls looking for the Winchester brothers.

When she caught wind of their voices coming from the torture room, she made her way over. Arriving at the foot of the entrance of the room, her eyes landed on the Ma’lak box and the boys standing by it. She didn’t have a good feeling about the sight before her. “What are you boys doing in here?” She asked walking up to them and the box.

Sam turned to her looking perplexed, “Dean thought of an idea on how to handle Jack.”

She glanced at the markings on the box before them. This definitely wasn’t going to be a good idea. She looked over at Dean waiting to hear this idea of his.

“As I was saying, we put Jack in here. It was built to hold an archangel, it should hold Jack too.” The older Winchester explained.

“And then what?” Y/N asked crossing her arms.

“Then, we seal him in here and everybody’s safe.” Dean spoke confidently.

She chuckled, “What? We going to throw him in the deepest part of the ocean? Just like what you had planned to do when you had Michael in your head?” She knew that losing Mary took a heavy toll on Dean, but for him to suggest to lock Jack away was absurd. Jack was still family to her, even with what happened to Mary. No one was perfect. Not her. Not Sam. Not Dean. Especially not Jack. Did that mean that those who weren’t perfect deserve to be treated like the bad guy?

Y/N looked over at Sam who she could tell was very conflicted with this idea.

“Y/N, sweetheart, this is for the better. We can just keep him here till we find a way to get his soul back.” Dean answered.

That was the last straw. She couldn’t do this, listen to his ridiculous plan, especially if he had to lie to her to get her to go along with it. Dean may have been good at lying to others about pretending to be what was needed in a situation, but he wouldn’t be able to fool her.

She fisted her hands beside her as she looked at the box. “No. I’m not going along with this. There has to be another way.” She turned her back to them and left, heading straight for her car keys and the bunker entrance door. Neither of them had called after her, but she heard Sam say one sentence before she went out of ear range. ‘You shouldn’t have lied to her, she can tell better than anyone when you lie.’

Grabbing her keys, she got into her 1969 Camaro as she drove off to give herself some time away from Dean, the Ma’lak box, the Jack problem, everything. During the drive, she had begun feeling sick to her stomach again. She pulled off to the side, only a couple of miles away from the bunker. She got out of the car quickly, walking over to the open field on the right side of the road as she bent over dry heaving.

She was unaware of how long she had spent feeling like she wanted to throw up with nothing coming out. Eventually, she felt her body finally calm down and return to normal. Walking back to the Camaro, she fell bottom first onto the dirt ground leaning against her car.

She placed her head in her hands as she began questioning when did it all go wrong. Was it when Jack killed Michael? Or even further back when they brought Jack back from the dead, sacrificing his soul? How could no one have seen the changes in Jack after all that had happened to him?

The answer she sought was actually pretty simple. She didn’t want to see a change in the Nephilim. She remembered what Donatello had told her and Dean when they brought Jack to him. The prophet had never really confirmed Jack had no soul, but at the same time, he also hadn’t confirmed that the boy still had any portion of his soul at all.

Her head began to hurt thinking about it all when she felt the ground below her shake.

“What the hell? An earthquake?” She questioned as she stood up and used her car for support. When it stopped, her first thought went to Dean and Sam and the bunker. She quickly got into her car.

As she was about to start the engine, Castiel appeared beside her in the shotgun seat. The angel stared at her for a moment as if noticing a difference about her but had decided to not speak of it. Jack would be his priority right now. “Y/N. I need your help.”

“Cas? What is it? Is everything okay? The earthquake just now…”

“It was Jack. Dean and Sam tricked Jack to get into the Ma’lak box but he broke out and is now on the loose. I know you probably aren’t happy with Jack too, but I need to find him. Duma was manipulating Jack and told him that his actions would please you and the Winchesters. We just need to find him and talk to him.” Cas had been pleading for help to someone he thought was on Dean’s side.

She closed her eyes and took a deep breath. Her initial instinct after the earthquake was to get back to Dean and Sam, but Dean was only seeing red when it came to Jack. Hearing that he had gone through with his plan to try and lock up Jack saddened Y/N. Dean wasn’t in a reasonable state of mind, no matter what anyone said to him, he was set on one goal: to stop Jack at any cost. She opened her eyes coming to a resolve, “I’ll help, Cas. Let’s go find Jack and bring this family back together.”

Cas was surprised by her answer but a thankful smile appeared on his face.

Next: Part Three

Feedback is welcome!

FDEIB Tag:

@polina-93 @awesome-badass-cafeteria-sauce @deanwinchestersmydaddy @witch-of-letters

#dean winchester x reader #dean x reader #Dean Winchester #supernatural spoilers #Supernatural #Spn fanfic #Supernatural Season 14 #Family Dont End In Blood

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bluephoenixdruidicprincess · 5 years

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SPN 14x18, Absence -- Review

The controversial episode is at last upon us. This week we had 14x18, Absence and I have some thoughts on this episode. Now, I haven't read any other metas for this episode before writing this so I apologize if I'm repeating thoughts that have already been vocalized. There will be spoilers so I strongly advise against reading this if you haven't seen the episode.

Overall Thoughts

We'll begin with how I felt overall with this episode. Structurally, this was a very good episode. It had two central purposes it needed to fulfill and I think it did a very good job with that; saying good-bye to Mary and the culmination of Jack's descent into the Dark Side. The music was perfect. The cinematography was fantastic in this episode. The framing in these shots were beautiful. It really made you feel like you were in the episode. Cinematography often tells a story in much the same way that writing does and I really appreciated how well the cinematography was telling this story. Like for instance, the moment in the very end of the episode where they're burning Mary's body and it's being done at a crossroads and the camera pulls away at the very end to reveal the crossroads, it just gives you this very eery feeling of how things are not okay. It's symbolic of the crossroads Sam, Dean, and Cas are currently on. Where do they go from here? How do they tackle this conflict they're currently in? Which path do they take? And it's also very telling that Sam and Cas are on a different crossroads path than Dean in that scene. Sam and Cas are on the crossroads that leads to the impala which is symbolic of home and family and Dean is on a completely different crossroads path. And of course, the crossroads can also be seen as representative of the crossroads Jack is currently on, as well. Where does he go from here? Because of his one action, a reflex at that, everything has changed for him and he has no idea which path to take. Should he take the path that leads to the impala? A part of him is afraid to do that because he knows nothing will be the same again even if the Winchesters accept him despite what happened to Mary. Or should he take a different path that he's never known before? He's also scared to do that because it's unfamiliar as well. So that one pull away shot did a fantastic job of depicting all of that in a few short seconds.

Saying Good-Bye to Mary Winchester

I'm of two minds on the death of Mary Winchester Part Two. I don't particularly appreciate what this show does to its female characters in order to provide man-pain. But I do definitely feel like in this moment, Mary fared better than a lot of the other female characters in this show's past. This episode basically served as an entire memorial of Mary and that's something we don't typically get a lot of on this show so I will give the show that. And I also appreciate the symmetry in her death. In her first death, she was trying to protect Sam from Azazel and essentially at the same time, protecting Sam from his own fate, protecting Sam from himself. And in this moment, 14 years later, she's also trying to protect Jack from himself. So always and forever in her last moments, she's trying to protect her children and I admire that. And I also enjoy the opposition of her death in which her first death was something that was no doubt quite painful for her but her second death was something that was painless and she probably didn't even realize it was happening. I'm a little salty that her death was something that happened off-screen and that it wasn't a "blaze of glory" kind of thing and that it was something as stereotypical as a mother trying to protect her child but at the same time, I also can appreciate that as well. If that makes any sense? And I enjoy the idea behind Mary finally being at complete joy and peace with John. Now, is this The John or is it a representation of her memories? Who knows? I like to think it's The John, though. What with everything that happened in the 300th episode. Is it strange that John's name also wasn't included on her door? A little. But that's not to mean that John doesn't have another door that leads to that same heaven. As humans, we like to think in straight lines but heaven wasn't created by humans so I doubt it functions in a straight line capacity.

I always figured Mary was going to die eventually so it wasn't really all that shocking. She's basically had one foot on Death's porch since she first met Billie in season 12. And I've been thinking on Amara a little bit on this and on whether or not the Universe as its own entity actually approved of the resurrection of Mary. Perhaps, Jack's existence was the Universe's way of rectifying the decision that Amara made. I feel like we've seen both with Mary and Samuel that the longer you're dead and then brought back, you come back just a little bit different. You feel off in a way, like you shouldn't be there. I think Samuel tried to hide it by latching onto Mary and thinking, "If I just have Mary back then maybe this feeling of wrongness will go away." And a lot of season 12 I think played into Mary trying to figure out a place in the world all the while still feeling like she was somehow "wrong". She eventually got to a place where maybe not feeling 100% like she belonged, but she found contentment and she was able to kind of bury it down. But anyway, that's just a head canon I play around with sometimes.

I loved how so much of this episode was done in flashbacks paying homage to Mary and showing exactly what she meant to each of them and I thought that was very nice. All to culminate in the very end of them in the funeral having to say good-bye to her.

Let's Talk About Jack

Jack was really interesting in this episode. Particularly, in his dealings with what I refer to as Negative Jack. Yeah, yeah, I know. It was in the form of Nick and/or Lucifer but at least my reading on it was that it's not about Nick or Lucifer directly. What Jack was seeing was an amalgamation of the negative issues he houses inside his subconscious. All of his insecurities and fears, it popped up to appear as Lucifer because that's how Jack views Lucifer. He views Lucifer as everything he fears to become, everything negative about him essentially. And that's what Mark Pellegrino was actually depicting. Not Lucifer, not Nick, but Negative Jack. Of course, the show could easily come back and say that parts of Lucifer slivered in from that botched resurrection of Nick's but until that happens I'm going with this. And it's a really interesting concept. We've all had those moments where we've allowed out negativity to take over us and cause us to make decisions that maybe aren't in our best interests or what's not particularly good for us. And it's really interesting to see Jack going through this with the aid of a physical manifestation of his own negativity. We're basically seeing Jack's negativity influencing his decision making. He's afraid that he has no soul and that's the reason why Negative Jack tells him what he's feeling is only a muscle reflex, that in actuality he doesn't feel guilt about Mary. Jack, of course, does feel guilt about it but the Negative side of him is afraid that he isn't so it's influencing him in that direction. He fears that the Winchesters will never forgive him so Negative Jack tells him they'll never forgive him. And even if they did, "they'll never trust you again so you shouldn't trust them." It's Jack's Negativity based out of his own fears and insecurities that's telling him to cut his ties and reasoning with him that that's the best course of action, he's losing to that negativity.

And in regards to Jack and the botched Mary resurrection, I was getting some hardcore flashbacks to Full Metal Alchemist and I loved it. The whole idea of necromancy and Rowena saying that Jack was not in a state to do this kind of spell it just really reminded me of the "give and gain" aspect of Full Metal Alchemist where when practicing Alchemy, in order to gain something you have to give something up. Now in Full Metal Alchemist, the "give" aspect is much more literal and physical but that's FMA not Supernatural, a whole different set of rules. The fact that Rowena was talking about how Jack's current mental state could affect how the spell went, it was interesting to think about that the spell could essentially call upon the caster's mental state to basically serve as the "give" ratio thereby you're giving a piece of yourself to bring someone back which is also quite reminiscent of what happened earlier this season with Lily Sunder. And what the spell takes from you can affect what would be brought back. If Jack was calm and positive, maybe he could've brought back Mary? But the spell feasting on his negativity could've called upon anything and brought back an evil ghost or maybe even Azazel himself? But I also think due to Jack's desperation and a sense of feeling like he needed to do this as opposed to wanting to do this, there was a sense of emptiness in him which is why an empty shell was brought back. He didn't feel like he needed to bring back Mary because it was the right thing to do, himself being dead earlier that season perhaps wishing he was being given more of a choice in the matter maybe, but he felt like he owed it to his family to bring her back. Throughout the episode, I never felt like Jack WANTED to bring back Mary, it always felt like he HAD to. And when you feel you have to do something out of obligation and not from a general want, it can create this emptiness in you. But that's how I look at it.

All in all, I enjoyed this episode. I thought it was really interesting and I'm going to give it a B. I thought it was very well executed. It gave us a lot of interesting material to think about and I enjoy that. And I’m excited to see where the remaining two episodes of the season are going to take us.

Tagging @metafest like usual. Sorry, y'all that I didn't really contribute last week. Last week was an episode I didn't have any thoughts on, meta or otherwise.

And if you're wondering about my take on the "you're dead to me" aspect of the episode (as I was a little vocal about it during the promo), I'm going to tackle that in another post. I don't want to really burden my friends at Metafest with my Bitter Cas Fan opinions on that.

#spn 14x18 #spn 14.18 #14x18 #14.18

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4s-status · 6 years

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“I’ll be back” The Theory on 4S

This is a long one, and is also extremely image heavy. This theory contains heavy spoilers for all of II Season 2. For simplicity, I’ll be referring to MePhones as their numbers.

So I’ve been trying to compile this for a while now, but I believe that the II team has been hinting at 4S returning. In fact this has been going on for quite some time now, as early as "A Kick in the Right Direction.”

We know that, as of the end of Season 1, 4S’s code is within 4, because he downgraded himself to revive 4. We also know that 4′s initial death is heavily tied to Bow, and her own death.

"A Kick in the Right Direction,” the 5th episode of Season 2, begins with talk of Bow and how 4 cannot recover her due to also being dead at the time. We also get a glimpse of 4 looking at a “MeOS” update on his system for a few moments, and when Marshmallow walks up he acts like its something she shouldn’t see.

“This will cause your MePhone’s appearance to drastically change, and turn into a weapon of mass destruction. Oh, and you can’t switch it back... EV-ER. So yeah, make a choice.”

Remember that 4S had to downgrade to revive 4. Also, 4S was built to be dangerous, at least towards 4. This upgrade sounds like it would return 4 to 4S, and make him unable to return to 4.

Now onto the obvious episode, “Theft and Battery.”

Its come to my attention there’s a bunch of moments where 4′s screen turns partially or even mostly red while he is glitching out, which would be an obvious nod to 4S. There are even moments of glitch with only blue and red mixed. I think the II team wants to make sure we don’t forget 4S exists. Note that most of the red and red/blue glitches occur right before he shuts off. Also note that the bottom of 4′s screen even seems a bit redder, though this is more noticeable when 4 tells MePad to “hurry it up already.”

(sorry for the image wall)

We learn a lot about Meeple later in this episode, but nothing else is specifically relevant to this theory. There are ways it can be related, but it wouldn't directly support my point.

Jump to “Kick the Bucket.” Fan is flipping out about his “two teams win in a row” theory. He holds up this sign, exclaiming about how “anything is possible now.”

“Each team must win twice in a row in order to split the focus equally amongst the contestants. There are more subtle ways of doing this, but those would require genuine creativity. If anything occurs to somehow disrupt this monotonous pattern, well, basically, barriers will fall from alignment, a hole will be forged in the depths of time, pasts will be exposed, and other otherworldly forces will reign, among other things, probably.”

Barriers will fall from alignment: Marshmallow leaves the parameters of the show and does not return.

A hole will be forged in the depths of time: All of “Alternate Reality Show,” the next episode.

Pasts will be exposed: We saw to the past and other parallel futures in “Alternate Reality Show,” but I do not think anything major was “exposed.” I believe this may refer to 4S, as he is a part of the past that could very well be “exposed.”

Other otherworldly forces will reign: Cobs???????? “Anything is possible now”...

Moving on to “Alternate Reality Show,” it may have just been a segway into 4S returning in the coming episode. Nothing specifically relating to this theory happened, just that it heavily nods to Season 1 is enough.

Now, this isn't all. You may have noticed 4S being hidden in many episodes, and the wiki will tell you that. That’s just another way the crew wants to make sure we don’t forget him. I know @cspel (it won't let me tag sorry) mentioned to me this one in particular from “Marsh on Mars.” (He has his own theory on 4S that you can read here.) I think it’s interesting the animator decided to depict 4S as being sad or scared.

Now, everyone remembers those lovely character pages that were coming out on Wednesdays not too long ago. Its interesting that not only do competitors from Season 1 do not get pages, but neither do 4 and his cohosts. I think this may be because they could maybe give 4S a page too and do them all at once, but I know this is a stretch.

Finally some personal opinions on how this could go down. A recent tweet by Adam has a background done for the upcoming episode of a sunset.

It is likely the episode will come out at the end of the month, and as such could be a Halloween episode. It is worth noting that 4S first appeared in Season1′s Halloween Special. Also, we know the contest will be Treasure Hunting. This may in itself have something to do with “pasts will be exposed”, as discoveries are made when digging something up. In fact, all the choices for contests for the upcoming episode had to do with digging in some way...

But anyway, that’s my theory. I don’t really have much more to say, but feel free to ask me questions about it!

#ii #inanimate insanity #mephone #mephone 4 #mephone 4s #evidence #long post #THIS TOOK TWO HOURS

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pass-the-bechdel · 5 years

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Dollhouse season one full review

How many episodes pass the Bechdel test?

92.3% (twelve of thirteen).

What is the average percentage per episode of female characters with names and lines?

46.83%

How many episodes have a cast that is at least 40% female?

Nine, over half (six of those were 50%+, one of them 60%).

How many episodes have a cast that is less than 20% female?

Zero.

How many female characters (with names and lines) are there?

Twenty-eight. Thirteen who appeared in more than one episode, six who appeared in at least half the episodes, and one who appeared in every episode.

How many male characters (with names and lines) are there?

Forty-two. Eleven who appeared in more than one episode, five who appeared in at least half the episodes, and three who appeared in every episode.

Positive Content Status:

Not good at all. The series is rife with violence against women and involves sexual assault on a constant basis, with acknowledgment or exploration of such inclusions intermittent and interlaced with excuses. Needless to say, it never even gets close to flirting with an above-average content rating (average rating of 2.76).

General Season Quality:

A mess. There are elements of good things here, and some episodes that utilise that potential, but mostly this is a show that doesn’t seem to know what it wants to do or how far it really wants to pursue its own promises, and it is full of dead air and extremely questionable storytelling, wrapped around one of the least-dynamic lead characters I’ve ever seen. It’s a recipe for failure, and a disappointing one at that, because done right, this could have been truly amazing.

MORE INFO (and potential spoilers) under the cut:

Let’s nail down how consent works, because it might be the most important issue at the heart of this show that the writers just don’t seem to understand: consent is not a binding contract. Real consent is

1. ongoing (may be revoked at any time if the individual in question wishes; must be re-established or renegotiated if the circumstances originally consented to change)

2. enthusiastic (if the individual becomes uncertain/uncomfortable with conditions, actions must halt until consent has been renegotiated and re-established)

3. informed (an individual cannot consent to terms that are obfuscated or omitted; consent gained through lies or trickery is not consent at all), and

4. willing (coerced consent - whether through threats, ultimatums, manipulation, or other means - is not real consent. If the individual is placed in a position where declining is not a viable safe option, they cannot give consent).

Pretty clear-cut, really. With that in mind, the only way that the Dollhouse could operate in an ethical manner would be if the dolls were genuine volunteers who were restored to their original personalities after every engagement, so that they could consider the requirements of each job as they arose and pick and choose which ones they were comfortable fulfilling; it would then also require that their imprinted personality include strict parameters agreed to beforehand to preserve their ability to revoke consent if their boundaries are violated. Of course, there would still be LOADS of ways for the technology to be abused, but that’s an irrelevant discussion in context, because that’s not how the Dollhouse operates. Many of the dolls are not willing participants from the outset, but even if they are, after being stripped of their personalities and memories they lose the power to make informed choices and their enthusiasm is all programmed in, and it’s irrelevant anyway because they are not presented the opportunity to give or deny consent in their ongoing situation. Whether or not the dolls can consent is not up for debate: by definition, plain and simple, they cannot. To suggest otherwise is kinda the same thing as when people say that marital rape isn’t a real thing, as if signing a marriage contract permits your spouse to override your bodily autonomy anytime they want. Consent can be fickle, subjective, and highly conditional, and those are all good things because they protect the basic human right to personal sovereignty. Consent is not a binding contract.

Despite occasionally throwing around lines about how ‘you can’t consent to being a slave!’, the show doesn’t want to commit to the idea that the dolls are, unequivocally, being abused, and the failure to be morally assertive on that point leads to some seriously reprehensible presentations, most notably in terms of rape. The oft-repeated lofty idea behind what (theoretically) makes the Dollhouse ‘good’ is that they give people ‘what they need’, which mostly means fulfilling sexual fantasies. Naturally, this makes all of the Dollhouse clients who acquire a doll for sexual purposes, rapists. They know that’s what they’re getting into, too, they know that they’re paying big bank to have a person brainwashed into fulfilling their desires, which by definition means that the person is being denied the capability to give consent. This isn’t a naughty secret being hidden from the client; it’s a known factor which they’ve decided they don’t care about. They’re ok with taking advantage of this person in order to fulfill their ‘need’. Thus, the fact that Joel Miner just wants to play house with an imprinted version of his dead wife is not cute or romantic, it’s still rape, but the show doesn’t treat it that way: it’s directly handled like we’re supposed to be happy that he gets what he wants, in the same episode as the writing finally bothers to dabble vaguely in the concept of consent issues after it turns out that Sierra has been raped by her handler (while NOT imprinted to think she wants it). Thus, the episode in question draws a straight parallel between the idea that there’s ‘real rape’ (what Hearn does), and then there’s innocent wish fulfillment (what Miner and anyone else who bothers to have their victim programmed first does), and we shouldn’t conflate the two. Except, obviously, we should conflate the two. Both are rape. There’s not a moral grey-scale here, that’s like arguing that if you drug someone first so that they can’t resist, that’s less assaultive than if they were cognizant enough to struggle. Both are rape, both disregard the bodily autonomy of the victim and deny them the right of choice. ‘But I really miss my dead wife!’ doesn’t make it better, and it certainly doesn’t make it ok. And giving people ‘what they need’ at the expense of others is not virtuous - especially when you factor in the price tag attached to a made-to-order sex slave.

The above-referenced episode is one of the most egregious examples of this at play, but it’s a recurrent issue throughout the series, and not one that’s gonna go away. The story is not interested in analysing the fact that DeWitt has repeatedly raped Victor; her conflict about the issue revolves around the feeling that she - like the other Dollhouse clients - is pathetic for ‘needing’ programmed service. And while Ballard expresses misgivings about the idea of raping Mellie, he still does it, repeatedly, and there’s no condemnation from the narrative; we’re supposed to see this as a complication to Ballard’s moral compunctions, that he’s confronted with shades of grey in the black-and-white world he had imagined, but there are no shades of grey. You knowingly committed rape. More than once. The first time they had sex, when he didn’t know she was a doll? THAT is something Ballard can feel conflicted about, because he didn’t do it knowingly, he was not able to make an informed decision, his own ability to consent was impaired and he’s entitled to feel abused by the Dollhouse machinations that put him in that position. THAT is legitimate conflicted emotion. Going “fuck you, Dollhouse, you want to send me a sex slave, I’m gonna take out my conflicted emotions ON HER through what I readily recognise as rape”, that’s...not something a character can do and then still hang around on the show representing any kind of morality. That’s not even anti-hero material, that’s villainy, and if we respond to Hearn’s crimes by snapping his neck against a coffee table, why is Ballard still roaming around feeling righteous? The show is so sketchy on morality, it doesn’t even present Ballard’s attitudes as self-delusions, it isn’t exploring his descent into evil. Even from the first episode, it was unclear where the story really sat with Ballard, seeming simultaneously aware of the fact that he’s not as pure and heroic as he imagined himself, but also never pursuing the idea of exploring a more complex moral reality. If ‘now he’s a rapist but he feels bad about it (but not bad enough to NOT DO IT IN THE FIRST PLACE)’ is supposed to suffice as ‘deconstruction’, boy howdy, I got news. You can’t even pretend to deconstruct anything if you’re too busy equivocating to have an opinion in the first place.

I’ve used this word so much already in relation to this show that it’s starting to lose its meaning, but what Dollhouse really suffers from is a misogyny problem. I touched on it already in the episode ‘Omega’ when I talked about how Alpha’s ruminations on the nature of the self/consciousness/etc are undercut by the intense misogyny of his character and story, because his presence in the narrative and his impact on other characters is so heavily tied up in the violent expression of his misogyny that there’s no room for a clear-minded discussion of anything else, and in truth the entire series suffers from the same affliction. Misogyny is so ubiquitous in the story at the same time as being so rarely acknowledged that they can’t engage meaningful thematic discussions about anything else; misogyny is the elephant in the room, and so much space is being dedicated to it, there’s nowhere to squeeze anything else in edge-wise. The refusal to acknowledge the clear-cut nature of consent and thereby the inherent sexual assault built into the frame work of the narrative is part of this, but it also represents an insidious division between ‘real misogyny’ and the various kinds that the show doesn’t want us to acknowledge, the many and sundry equivocations it is entertaining in order to avoid having a moral backbone. Alpha literally slicing up women’s faces is ‘real misogyny’ (by the writers’ definition), and a character like Nolan putting Sierra in the Dollhouse so that he can have force her to have sex with him is ‘real misogyny’ (quite contradictory since Nolan still has his doll programmed to want him, just like all the other clients; apparently it’s only rape if the perpetrator is a mustache-twirling cackling supervillain type). Tanaka slinging off about ‘whores’ is ‘real misogyny’ that Ballard can take umbrage with, but Ballard’s infantalising obsession with calling women ‘girls’? We’re not batting an eye. The fact that Echo is repeatedly engaged by one Matt Cargill, whose rape sexual fantasy is all about teaching a ditzy inexperienced girl new things? Cute! Echo being violently beaten in more than three-quarters of the episodes this season, sometimes multiple times per episode? Eh, that’s normal. That’s normal writing.

The ‘real misogyny’ is the stuff that the writing deems worthy of being called out, and like with the issue of creating a false grey-scale to excuse ‘softer’ rape crimes, this creates a situation in which more low-key misogyny can skate by unchecked because we’re being encouraged to view it comparatively, instead of objectively. If you’re talking about a violent serial rapist and you say “he calls women ‘girls’ all the time, too!”, it sounds like you’re being silly, because hello, there are much bigger problems to talk about. On the other hand, if you don’t sit around making softening comparisons, you can actually talk about how women being infantalised by men is a big problem that is part of a larger tapestry of misogyny, especially disturbing for the intersection with sexualisation (HUGELY at play with the dolls in their ‘doll state’), and relevant to the discussion of pedophilia (which, incidentally, the show featured TWICE in just thirteen episodes, but without any kind of exploration or commentary that would suggest an actual reason beyond the voyeuristic fetishisation of sexual violence which is this show’s bread and butter). Because the misogyny problem on this show is so all-encompassing (along with the rape-apologist grey morality, it is built into the framework of the series itself), the fact that it is never acknowledged and brought into the thematic conversation of the story blows a hole out the side of the writers’ ability to have any kind of sophisticated conversation about the morality of their subject matter: the combination of oblivious sexism and wanton avoidance leaves the moral compass of the story...nonexistent, really, smashed to pieces and rendered useless. It’s like they didn’t want to have to talk about the morality of the Dollhouse at all, they just wanted the narrative conceit of programmable people and the opportunity to indulge various objectifying fetishes, but since that’s not how storytelling works they figured they’d ramp up the ambiguity and pass off the lack of nuanced discussion as ‘shades of grey’, despite how inappropriate that is with sex trafficking. Thus, you get a show which treats “but if the perpetrator is sad, is it really rape?” like that’s a legitimate question.

Honestly, we could unpack this show forever, because all of it needs unpacking, because it’s riddled and stained irrevocably with garbage in a way that is pervasive and complicated, but I’m gonna let this lie for now. We’ll talk about it all more as season two unfolds, and when I review that season’s developments and eventually, the full series (save me). There’s loads of stuff that I didn’t even touch yet, so at least I know I won’t be starved for content. I did know that, coming in, I knew it’d be an unhappy mess. The one thing that really surprised me about season one is how little the narrative actually discussed its own invoked themes, I thought they did better than that - perhaps season two will fill that void a bit. Maybe Echo will get hit in the fucking face less, too. I’m not gonna bet on that. After all, what would this show be without women turned into sex objects and then violently punished for it? Well. For starters, it would be better.

#Dollhouse #Dollhouse season one #Bechdel Test #female representation #full season review

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peter-is-the-best-avenger · 6 years

Text

Mother Knows Best P.3

Previous Part

Pairing: Best Friend!Tom Holland x Reader

Words: 938

Pronouns: Her/She

Warnings: So first off, I’m really sorry that this is so late, and this part kinda sucks as well. Infinity War really messed with my head, and I haven’t been able to think or write straight since. Also, it’s worth mentioning that this story is pre-IW since I started writing it before the premiere and I’m also in denial of its very existence.

The atmosphere during dinner was very lively, the conversation topics changing like the seasons, since there was so much to catch Tom up on, and so much he wanted to say about his travels. Tom was currently raving about how amazing the press tour was and about all the places he visited, wildly gesticulating about how incredible his fans were. You watched how his eyes radiated as he passionately described his trip to Tokyo, and about how it was now his favourite city in the world.

The two of you kept catching each other’s gaze during dinner, neither of you having said a word to one another since your ‘moment’ in the living room. You couldn’t help but feel Tom’s eyes on you when you were brought up in conversation, mainly by Nikki, of course.

A couple of dodgy dad jokes later, Dom began praising his youngest’s recent sporting victory while Tom listened keenly.

“Alright, Padstaman!” He exclaimed, high fiving his little brother, who was grinning with pride.

“Woah, we’re getting off topic here, Tom. You were about to tell us who dies in Infinity War?” Sam asked. He had been trying to pressure his brother into revealing a spoiler all evening.

“No I wasn’t?” Tom tilted his head, raising his eyebrows.

“Is it Steve? I betcha it’s Steve.” Harry pestered.

“Bruv, even if I knew, I wouldn’t be telling you. Now quit asking me already!” He raised his hands in defence, earning a huff from the fanboys on either side of him. Nikki decided to change the subject before somebody lost their temper, deciding to tell her husband about what both you and her had accomplished together over the past week for the Brother’s Trust.

“This girl right here is a trooper. She worked tirelessly today, without a break, just to get the venue in order for tomorrow, and she’s been out and about this week gathering heaps of donations too.”

“Wait really?” Tom croaked, “You didn’t have to do that, Y/N.”

“But I wanted to.” You echoed his words from earlier, maintaining eye contact for the first time since dinner began. You watched Tom’s face light up with admiration, and you suddenly became paranoid that everyone in the room could hear your heartbeat quicken.

“By the way,” Nikki spoke up, “I think we might have a spare toothbrush that you can have Y/N, and we’ll find you some pyjamas for the night before you leave?” She offered.

“No point, she’ll probably end up wearing something of Tom’s, anyway.” Harry muttered under his breath, receiving a sharp elbow in his side, courtesy of Tom. “It’s true though. Don’t pretend you don’t enjoy it.” Sam whispered, backing Harry up. Nicki watched this exchange and rolled her eyes, chuckling to herself as she sent a subtle smirk your way. You caught her expression, causing your eyes to travel over to Tom whose cheeks had a slight pink hue to them, no doubt yours did too.

“Well, uh, it’s getting late anyway,” Tom cleared his throat, “We should probably start making tracks. Y/N?”

“I agree. Thank you for dinner, it was delicious as always.” you thanked Tom’s parents as the two of you stood to leave.

“I’ll see you to the door.” Nikki abruptly said as she left the dinner table. “Y/N, go up to the bathroom, will you? There should be a new toothbrush in the cabinet above the sink. Tom, can I speak with you for a moment?” You went upstairs to the bathroom, leaving the two to talk in the hall. On your way back downstairs, toothbrush in hand, you could hear Tom in a hushed debate with his mother. You could tell by the tone of his voice that he was frustrated about something, but he wasn’t angry, that much you knew. His expression faltered when he noticed your presence at the top of the staircase, forcing a smile even though you knew there was something bothering him.

“Shall we?” Tom gestured as he held the front door open for you. He seemed slightly on edge, and you wished you knew why.

“We shall.” You responded, as you crossed the threshold, and stopped outside. Turning to your practically-second-mother, you smiled, “Thank you, Nikki,” Your eyes flickered to Tom for a moment before continuing, “for everything.”

“Don’t thank me yet.” She hinted, leaving Tom with a baffled expression. “Safe home, and I’ll see you both bright and early in the morning, yeah?”

“Yeah.” You both replied as you left the house, walking side by side to Tom’s place.

“What was all that about?” He asked, nodding his head in the direction of Nikki who was still standing at the front door, watching you walk away.

“Oh, nothing. Just girl things, you wouldn’t understand.”

“Riiiiight.” He mumbled, eager to change the subject, which made you laugh at his awkwardness.

In the short walk between the Hollands’ and Tom’s, you were both pretty quiet. You felt Tom’s fingers lightly dancing over your own as you walked, before he intertwined them, squeezing your hand gently. You would do this often as kids, so it shouldn’t have felt weird, but it did. There was an underlying tension between the two of you that neither was brave enough to address.

You thought back to the moment before you left the Holland’s house, your face etched with concern as you wondered what had made Tom so agitated.

If only you had known the topic of that discussion. If only you could have heard what Nikki had said to Tom in the moments before you appeared.

“Tonight’s your chance, son.”

Next Part

Thanks for reading! I seriously cannot believe how many people are enjoying this series so far, your kind words and wonderful messages really do keep me going. Please let me know what you thought of this chapter and what you’d like to see in the upcoming instalments, I’d love to see the story unfold with your ideas and input!

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lil-area-sfw · 6 years

Note

Well, that certainly was ah, uh... one of these things? Right, a finale. Yeah, that was that thing. Wah.

Yes, the finale… And I have so much to say that I think if I put everything I have in my head it will end being a looong post… Eh, I will be doing a long post anyway, just shorter than the original long post I have in mind… You get that, right? ^ ^’

I think it’s been a while for people not being spoiled so, no spoiler tags and here I go.

I didn’t know they will air both episodes Divide and Conquer at the same time. I’m one of those people who prefers to have their weekly things, because I know that if we get all at once, the material will end and I’m almost sure the hiatuses become longer. I dunno why the decision if each episode lasted 22 mins. Well, it wasn’t a bomb so it’s better :3

Now for the first episode, Divide.

We start the episode with a missing Queen Moon and we can see Star should take her obligations right away. I never thought we will see this situation in show. I liked that. We could see how Star takes it and how she experiences by herself the level of her mother’s work.

Marco really takes his *squire job seriously*. I don’t know why but, in this moment, I could feel that reason more like an excuse than ever. Here he felt like he uses that to be with her… more than in other occasions for some reason.

I was wondering where River was. Then he was there. Offering emotional support ^ ^I really wonder why in situations of missing queens the king can’t take some responsibility. Politics sucks sometimes ^ ^’. All the weight goes over an inexperienced teenager… just like when Moon’s mother died.

Yes, the part when Star was overwhelmed with responsibility was something. I specially liked when she went to Glossaryck for counseling like old times but he only gaves her a helpless look. Ouch.

And well, there was a meeting to talk about the situation. They let us know that Mina already fought with Meteora and lost… Why they skip those epic moments…? >.

Also, we can see that Star sure is mad with the council members now. Too bad for Dad Rhombulus…

Then after all this and Star almost making a hasty decision, we have this… Dude!

Marco offered himself to handle the situation. He sure rocked there. Looked so cool.

Yes, despite me having troubles with all the time skip situation and wondering why he still has a 15 years old mind, it’s really nice that they referenced Marco still has the abilities he learned. It’s WAY better than swapping that under the rug. We never know that before, I suppose he remembered them while traveling with Hekapoo again, closing portals.

But anyway, Marco looks on pair with Star now, he can kick magic and stuff ^ ^

Being honest, I didn’t like at first that he resisted Spider with a top hat but then I saw that those are friggin 16 fighting experience years, 16! And Star is on pair with that :3

I loved the zoom out of the battle. They, face to face panting… taking a breath. Two skilled friends having a wonderful match.

And then Star checking her good friend too… Just checking :3It’s interesting that Marco already knew what she was checking for XD

The episodes had many moments between them both and I specially liked how Star tried to look tough but ended accepting she was scared and wanted some confort. And what’s better than a hug of your best friend whom you have feelings for :). Of course it was easier for Marco to accept he was scared too.

After this we go through spaghetti and they trying to look as two cool best friends in front of other people but failing miserably. Yeah, we love to see those dumb heads in denial. You’re not fooling anyone… stop. Ok don’t stop, it’s funny ^ ^

The following part of the episode is the division of both of them, hence the name of the episode. Marco will try to delay Meteora and Star will search for her mom.

I need to say that I liked the team. It was a bit strange not seeing Rhombulus there tho.

So Hekapoo has a crush on Raventalon… Neat. Less Marco harem’s vibe is fine by me >:) *cough*

And yeah I noticed Tom has an attire that looks like a fire nation one. Nice cameo :PNot much to say here besides the assembly and the beginning of the fight.

We switch to Star into the magic realm. She finally founds Moon following the traces of dark goo she leaves. At first I didn’t notice but then I saw that she was “Washing off” the dark magic corruption in the magic waters. I have to say that Moon looks cuter without all that pompous make up.

You know what? Whatever the case, I felt good for her. Being queen with so many responsibilities and with the task of taking hard decisions since a young age, I can see why she’s so serious and strict. So, it was nice to see her so relaxed and carefree after all that time. I know she enjoyed that despite not remembering her own family. Well, I mean, she spent time playing with her daughter after all :)

Yeah, Star went in with a contingency plan but making it short, it didn’t work. She ended playing carelessly in the dimension while their friends waited for her. Portal shuts down. That would be a nice cliffhanger for next week but oh well, not complaining ^ ^

We have Conquer right away.

We take where we left and then we know the magic realm has some kind of upside down waterfalls that work like portals to other dimensions. I wonder if that would play some important role in upcoming happenings. I think they will.

I mean, what is this? Why are they showing it? Is this Hekapoo dimension or something?

They also got into a barrel that is shut and we never know what’s outside… I mean, it should be something more there, right…?

Here’s something a bit weird. After Star failing miserably with all her attempts to remember and go out with her mom, this dude appears…

And just says that they shouldn’t be there and transports them outside. I wonder what was that… but also, I wonder another thing. Star is transported to her room and appears sleeping, so she thinks it was just a dream until she’s fully awake and then concerns. Yeah concerns about her mom because she’s not there! So, Ok, Moon shouldn’t be there, but where she should be then if not her home? Where is she? It doesn’t look like she ended in her castle. Lets’ hope this leads to an interesting story.

Ok, switch to the battle. And yes, I must say that I loved it. Finally a fight! I really missed that in Battle of Mewni. They skipped the fights and that was a really lame decision. I mean, if Star vs Toffee was something near this, I wouldn’t have any complaining!

That teamwork, I love teamwork! ^ ^With the exception of Ponyhead who got defeated quickly because she couldn’t see with the dam helmet on. You can have anything on your head now and that’s all you do?… Ah, Ponyhead, I don’t dislike you but you’re a difficult character.

Also, as I said the team was really good but if I have to choose the best guy there, that’s Tom ^ ^. For sure! He went overboard with everything. He even looked like the most skilled person there.

Dam, he sent Meteora to the underworld! Sure it didn’t last long but not even a council member of I dunno how many years old, made any move in the dire situation.

Of course, that couldn’t be all. If that were the case it would be interesting but sure unfulfilling.After all that, we see how Meteora defeats each one of them and we are left with just, yes, Tom and Marco. Marco with his experience in the other world and Tom being Tom… Yes, for sure he was something.

So, the moment under the rock when they think everything’s lost. Two things I liked from it: First, Tom not looking so stuck anymore, he was such a nice guy even acknowledging Marco’s his best friend now.Second, Marco already confessed Tom about the kiss after feeling guilty cause all the support Tom gave him. Yes! No secrets and hidden things drama! That thing’s over! Also, maybe that will make people raging about the kiss change their minds a bit. I always say that we should wait for the next episode before going nuts. I want to think this is the case :3

Ok, what was I saying? Oh, yes, did I say Tom was awesome in this episode?

I’ll say that again :)

Dude! Tom was awesome in this episode!

He thought Marco was lying to him to make him leave. Then he discovers he wasn’t lying and he doesn’t lose it, just stays there protecting his best friend. Also that trait of having hundreds of demons inside makes him practically immune to Meteora’s soul sucking. Someone please tell me Tom sucks, I want to laugh XD

Of course, Marco will not stay there waiting for his friend to get soul depleted, so he acts anyway and we end with a soul less Marco.

Tom carries Marco and only Marco to Star. The moments when Star realizes Marco is gone aren’t particularly detailed as shocking but we can see how Star reacts and feels, even more when she decides to go to heal him to the sanctuary. It doesn’t work and yeah, this episode has many endearing moments, so hug for Tom too and we can see how is he trying to fulfill the promise to Marco to keep Star safe. But yeah, Star has gone for a big character growth so she will not run from his problems anymore.

Interesting thing there, is that just as Star didn’t know about Tom’s tail, Tom didn’t know about Star’s butterfly form. Every time we’re shown how not that close they are :/ Tom’s a nice guy, I knew he will going to be the Jackie 2.0 of the relationship. Oh well.

Final scene and we got our DARN FINAL BATTLE. Finally! I’ve always said that the writers learn from mistakes of previous seasons and this is not changing my mind. Tom as the other love interest got plenty screen time and development and the villains weren’t dispatched with an unfulfilling and fast deux ex. I wish they could’ve done this earlier. Look at that scenario and action scenes! X)

Then the moment many of us liked. Before a defeated Star we see how Eclipsa comes in (She was missing before, I must clarify) takes the wand and it goes to its Eclipsa form! That shows that the wand can go to his other forms if the bearer wants. Moon grabbed the wand several times but it stayed in Star’s form, so it was a bit confusing.

Ok, I was saying… That woman is too OP… plz nerf! Maybe it’s because her daughter didn’t counter attack but besides that, Meteora always looked so resistant but she comes in, blasts her a couple of times and then encloses her easily in some sort of bubble. Done.

For sure, this moment was heavy…

It’s not like I cried a bit or anything… *cough*

And yeah, defeating her restored everyone to their true self.

Again, lovely Starco moment when she jumps to catch Marco and only Marco. Then this.This episode is full of them ^ ^

Yeah, it was interrupted by Tom but I didn’t mind at all! It was a cute moment between those three. I wonder what does Tom thinks after all this… He knows about the kiss, he of course knows about the Blood Moon, he witness those moments. I hope they don’t take long for him to say something about that. I mean, how can the writers stretch that in a not annoying way? Can they…?

Well, after looking at a sad Elcipsa that seems to have lost everything, Star gives the wand to her… Some people were shocked by it but I thought she will do that since the trial when she knew she’s not form the royal bloodline.It was whoa. Eclipsa even accepts the wand after discovering that his daughter is alive, just deaged to a baby. Then they left, leaving a confused Star and Marco there. I know I’m not the only one puzzled by the happenings.

Oh, and yes, Glossaryck is fine and was pretending all this time or something. Was he? If so why? What’s with this dude? “I’ve been trying to tell you about Globgor” Yeah but why couldn’t you talk like a normal person before?? -__-

I have to mention the voice actor change here. They even made a pun in show. Well, it doesn’t sound as good to me. What a shame… I hope it grows on me tho. But Adam said that the new opening will grow on me because it was just that we got used to the previous one… and it didn’t. The current one just doesn’t go as well with the music and is not that lively as the previous one. It’s good… but not better. Let’s see if it’s different with Glossy.

Ok, ok, I think this really has been a long post so, I’ll try to not extend myself so much more.

That final scene was something. Eclipsa entering to the place where her husband is and saying “Hello, my love, we’re home…”

What will happen after this? What are they hinting? Eclipsa doesn’t look like a schemer but this gave a vibe of her planning something against all odds.

She doesn’t look like the evil queen people talked about… at all but we ended with her in front of a BIG crystallized monster. Does that mean something? Is he evil? If so, will Eclipsa join him or maybe will she be controlled by his beloved hubby?

I just know a thing: This cliffhanger is like 10 times better than the one in season 2. Well done SVTFOE crew! I will be expecting nice things for the last season (Ah, that sounds a bit sad ^ ^)Now, hiatus, come to me! I don’t fear you!

Hope you didn’t get bored with all my crap and read it til here. See you in another one of these :P

#arearants #SVTFOE #star vs the forces of evil #season finale #Divide #Conquer

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