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serpentandlily · 6 months

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Arcane - Azriel x Reader

Azriel x DeathGod!Reader

Summary: Azriel never thought he’d find his mate, was convinced the Mother hadn’t even given him one because he was unworthy. That is, until he stumbles upon his mate while looking for the most unusual ally.

Based on this request.

Warnings: very brief illusion to past SA

⋆˙⟡☾𖤓☽ ⟡˙⋆

“We’ve exhausted all our options,” Rhys declared, dropping his head into his hands. “I’m afraid another war is on the horizon. Koschei cannot be dealt with alone.”

“I don’t understand. The weaver and the bone carver were able to be killed,” Cassian interjected. “Why is it impossible for us to find a way to kill Koschei?”

“It took the might of the cauldron to defeat them,” Rhys explained.

“Well, then let’s ask Miriam and Drakon if we can use the cauldron,” Cassian replied, giving the obvious answer.

“It would be no use,” Feyre sighed. “I destroyed the book. We’d have no idea how to cast the spell the King of Hybern used that day. And we risk Koschei, himself, getting his hands on the cauldron.”

“There’s got to be another way,” Mor chimed in. “Something, someone, that could be as powerful as the sorcerer himself. He wasn’t the only God that found their way to Prythian.”

“Most of them are locked up in the Prison,” Rhys said. “And the Prison would not allow us to free any of them even if we wanted to.”

“Az, how has your search for Bryaxis been going?” Feyre asked.

“Not good,” Azriel answered honestly. “It’s like that thing disappeared from Prythian entirely.”

The room was silent for a moment until Amren sat up straight. “Wait, there is someone we could go to for help. As a last resort.”

Rhys lifted his head, staring at her with a heavy resolve. “No, absolutely not. It is too dangerous.”

“You said it yourself, we’re out of options!”

“What are you two talking about?” Feyre asked, looking between them.

Rhys let out a long breath. “Bryaxis…had a sibling. If you could even call her that. Someone who also came from wherever he slipped through from.”

“And why haven’t you mentioned this before?” Mor asked with a glare, crossing her arms.

“Because,” Rhys started. “Like I said, it’s too dangerous to get into contact with her. She’s…well, to be honest, no one really knows much about her. She keeps herself in a dark cave somewhere in the middle. Likes the darkness as much as Bryaxis does.”

“If no one knows much about her, then how do you know she’s dangerous?” Feyre asked. “Everyone was scared of Bryaxis until I went down there and was helped by it.”

“I’ve been told stories of her from my father,” Rhys explained. “How in the past, long before any of us were born, she could cause the fall of entire armies. Could level any court into rubble and dust.”

“And if that’s true, then doesn’t it speak to her character that she hasn’t done any of that? Maybe she is good of heart,” Mor suggested.

“We’re out of options, Rhys,” Amren said. “She might be our last hope.”

“Fine,” Rhys sighed. “I guess we better get ready for a trip to the middle.”

⋆˙⟡☾𖤓☽ ⟡˙⋆

“Alright, maybe this was a bad idea.”

Azriel glanced at Cassian to see him frowning as they stood in front of the dark cave. It was just him, Cass and Rhys who had come here to try and find this creature to ask for help. But it seemed Cassian was already losing his nerve.

“I tried to tell you,” Rhys muttered under his breath. “Azriel, can you scout ahead with your shadows?”

As soon as those words left Rhysand’s mouth, Azriel’s shadows darted ahead, trailing into the cave in a flurry. Azriel’s eyes widened as he was left standing completely bare, exposed. Not a single shadow had stayed with him, which was unusual. He tried to brush it off, tried to hide how uncomfortable he felt without them.

They waited expectantly but his shadows never returned. Azriel’s brows furrowed in confusion.

“I can’t call them back,” he said to his two brothers watching him. “They aren’t listening to me.”

“That’s…unusual,” Rhysand said, stroking his jaw.

Nothing more was said as the darkness in the cave seemed to grow and grow, almost extending out towards them despite the sun overhead.

“Who are you?”

The feminine voice was sensual yet sweet, playful almost. Nothing like he had been expecting. It struck something inside of Azriel, making his chest ache. Rhysand stood up straight, switching from brother to the High Lord in a mere second.

“I am Rhysand, High Lord of the Night Court,” Rhys answered, plucking a piece of lint from his coat. “If my sources are right, I believe you are y/n, sister of Bryaxis.”

“That I am,” the voice answered. “Why are you here? No one ever dares come here.”

Those words might’ve seemed like a threat, but her tone was light, curious.

“We’ve come to beg a boon,” Rhysand answered honestly. “There is another Death God who threatens war. We have been unable to stop his efforts.”

“Nobody has ever asked for my help before,” the voice said back in that same curious tone. “And what of Bryaxis. Will they help as well?”

“Bryaxis…Bryaxis was freed by my High Lady. We have been unable to find them.”

A step in the darkness. Another. Light footsteps came closer and closer to the edge of the cave. Azriel’s heart rate picked up, his hand falling to truth-teller. Cassian’s face was white and he looked ready to flee.

“You are afraid.”

It was not a question. Just a statement. But Rhysand answered it like it was.

“Bryaxis is made of nightmares,” he explained. “Something so terrifying to us. Perhaps you do not see it the same way but I imagine you are much the same and that is why we are…nervous.”

A laugh. A light, lilting laugh. Something sparked in Azriel’s chest.

“Me and Bryaxis are not made of the same thing, but opposite. A balance for our world,” the voice said. “Bryaxis is made of nightmares but I am made of dreams.

“Then why do you hide in the shadows?” The question came out of Azriel’s mouth before he even realized he was speaking. He could see his own shadows now, twirling in the darkness as if they were home.

“When we were captured, Bryaxis caused them fear so they were locked below the earth.” Her voice was sadder now, more serious and Azriel found himself hating that. “But I-I caused them…something different than fear. So they kept me locked in their bed chambers for decades, centuries, until I was able to escape. But then I learned those that did not desire me, feared me instead for the same reason. I was either caged or hunted. That is why I hide here.”

A shiver ran down Azriel’s spine. His face hardened at what she was implying. The fae who had captured the two Gods had locked one beneath the library and had used the other for…He felt sick to his stomach.

“If you are to help us,” Rhysand spoke, “I can promise you that we have no intention of keeping you locked up at all.”

“I do not trust the fae. Bind your words to magic and perhaps I will help you in return.”

“What is it that you want from us?”

It was silent for a moment, as if she were pondering.

“A place to stay. A place to live. Somewhere safe from being hunted or kept as a prisoner. A chance to live in this world, outside of this cave. To get to experience all that you do. That is what I wish for.”

Azriel knew that wish. Knew it all too well. For it was one he had for years while being locked in his father’s dungeon. So maybe that is why he found himself stepping closer to the cave, found himself unafraid of the darkness that had captured his own shadows.

Maybe that was why those words slipped out of his mouth before he could think of the repercussions, before he could be held back by one of his brothers.

“I will promise you that, y/n. I will promise you the opportunity to experience life outside of this cage, outside of the darkness.”

He could feel the heavy stares from his brothers on his back but he didn’t turn around, didn’t look anywhere but that darkness, even though he felt so exposed without his shadows.

Another footstep.

And another.

Until a figure began to emerge from the darkness, finally stepping into the light.

Azriel’s breathed hitched, his eyes widening in surprise. He wasn’t sure what he had been expecting, but it hadn’t been this.

Because before him now stood the most beautiful female he had ever seen. The type of beauty only a Goddess could possess. The type of beauty that had his head spinning, had his heart palpitating in his chest.

She smiled and he felt the whole world pause in that moment. It was a sight that would bring any male to his knees. A sight that could start wars.

She held out a small, delicate hand.

“Then I will help you, shadowsinger,” she said.

He mindlessly took her hand in his, shaking it as the sting of magic burned on both of their skin forming a bargain tattoo on the inner wrist. He looked down at it to see what the magic had created out of their promise to each other.

Swirls of shadows with a small lunar moth emerging at the end. A creature that sought light, finally leaving the darkness.

When he met her eyes again, those beautiful expressive eyes, he stumbled back a step. Stumbled as a golden thread unwound itself in his chest and pierced straight through the universe to the female standing before him.

⋆˙⟡☾𖤓☽ ⟡˙⋆

The battle lasted thirty-seven days. Koschei was defeated, the females he had spelled were freed. Beron had been exposed for helping him and was killed by Eris finally, bringing a new leader to Autumn.

And things were finally at peace.

“What are these again?”

Your index finger poked at the spongy thing on your plate. It smelled sweet, good. And it was warm to the touch. You glanced up to see the shadowsinger watching you, amused.

“Those are pancakes,” Azriel answered with a chuckle.

“Pancakes,” you repeated, slowly, testing the word on your tongue. “I thought cakes were desserts. Not breakfast.”

“They are a bit different from cake. Made in a pan instead of baked in the oven, hence the name,” Azriel explained.

You hummed in response, taking a bite out of one of the pancakes. “Hm, just as sweet as cake.”

“I might’ve added a bit more sugar than normal to them,” Azriel said, rubbing the back of his neck. “To satisfy that raging sweet tooth of yours.”

Your cheeks heated, that ticklish feeling in your stomach came again. A feeling you had never felt before this month and still had yet to make sense of. It made something in your chest ache when you looked at Azriel.

“You made these?”

Azriel nodded. “Someone slept through breakfast with the others.”

Your cheeks turned even redder.

“You should’ve woken me up,” you muttered before stuffing more bits of pancake into your mouth.

“You deserve to rest, y/n.” Azriel was still watching you with that little glint in his eyes. “After everything, you deserve to rest.”

Since coming to Velaris to help with Koschei, Azriel had been the one to show you around, to help you learn the customs of the fae. He had so much patience for you and your endless amounts of questions.

The others had helped you as well, had welcomed you into their home with open arms, but there was just something special about Azriel. You felt some sort of pull towards him. As if the darkness inside of you called to his.

He was beautiful, more than any God or male you’d ever seen before. And beneath his icy exterior, he was sweet and kind. Thoughtful. Witty.

You enjoyed being with the others but you preferred times like this, when it was just the two of you. He was less shy, more at ease, when it was just you. And something about that made you happy.

Seeing him smile, even when it was just the faintest expression, brought you joy like you’ve never felt before.

And Gods, he brought out so many emotions you had not felt in a very long time, some you hadn’t even known you could feel. You had begun to crave his presence. Desire it. You wondered if he felt the same.

“Did you still want to come with me to the city today?”

Azriel’s voice pulled you from your thoughts. That’s right, Azriel had cryptically told you he needed to pick something up from Velaris today. When you had asked him what he was getting, he had refused to answer.

“Yes, I would like to.”

“We’ll leave as soon as you’re ready.”

An hour later, you found yourself in Azriel’s arms, flying down to the city. Your heart was pounding in your chest at how closely he held you, like he was afraid you’d suddenly fall from his arms. You kept your own arms around his neck, playing with the ends of his hair.

You still remembered the few hours after the last battle. The showdown with Koschei had left you depleted, covered in wounds, but otherwise okay. Still, Azriel had burst into your tent with panicked eyes and only seemed to be calmed when you had let him tend to you like a mother hen.

You didn’t know what to make of his behavior. But you did know that being in his arms made you feel safe.

“Can we get more of those honey mooncakes on the way back?” you asked, trying to distract yourself from the ticklish feeling in your stomach again.

Azriel laughed, his chest rumbling against your body as he tightened his grip on you. “That sweet tooth of yours really is insatiable.”

“I didn’t get to finish mine from last time,” you said in defense for yourself. “Cassian got to them before me!”

“Well, next time tell Cassian to go get his own,” Azriel said. His breath ghosted against the tip of your ear, causing a trail of goosebumps on your skin. “I buy them for you, not him.”

Once again, you found yourself with red cheeks and a swelling heart. Ever since he had discovered your sweet tooth, Azriel had a habit of leaving sweet treats out for you. At first, he found it hilarious that a Death Goddess craved pastries of all things. But now he found it just downright adorable.

When the two of you returned to the House of Wind, you found Feyre and Mor waiting for you. You barely got out a small goodbye to Azriel before they were pulling you away, telling you it was time to start getting ready for the night.

Tonight was Starfall. Something you hadn’t seen in centuries. The girls helped you get ready as day turned to dusk and finally night.

“Come on, we’re going to be late,” Mor giggled, leading all of you out of the room and up to the main balcony. You could already hear the crowd and the music.

You felt nervous as you reached the top, your eyes instantly darting around to find that one person you were always looking for these days.

Azriel stood with Rhysand and Cassian, dressed in all black, finely tailored pants and a matching coat. He looked handsome, yet still beautifully lethal. The darkness and light bounced off the elegant planes of his face, causing his hazel eyes to glow golden.

When he caught sight of you, those eyes widened and you felt them roam your entire body. You’d always hated being looked at in such a way, but not with Azriel. Never with him.

In fact, you found yourself getting heated under his stare.

Rhysand and Cassian moved to their respective mates, leaving you to greet Azriel alone. He took your hand in his, pressing a gentle kiss to your knuckles.

“You are stunning,” he whispered. “Absolutely stunning. Happy Starfall.”

You blushed. “Thank you.”

Azriel gave you a rare smile that had your heart pounding. You peered at the crowd, watching the faeries enjoying their evening. Azriel stood with you, his fingers brushing against yours in a comforting gesture. He knew you weren’t the biggest fan of crowds, not when your presence was met with so many stares of both fear and desire.

“What are they doing?” You looked at the crowd of faeries that seemed to all be paired off, moving to the music from the band.

Azriel’s lips twitched, like they always did when you asked him a question like this. “They’re dancing.”

“Dancing,” you repeated. The word sounded familiar, like something you had known in a past life. You had spent so many years in that cave, you had turned into a mere shadow of who you used to be.

“Would you like to dance?”

Azriel had turned to look down at you, running a hand through his hair. His shadows curled around his wings.

“I don’t think I know how,” you whispered.

He held out his hand to you. “That’s alright. You can follow me lead.”

You bit your lip but decided to take his hand. He had promised you a chance of experiencing the world as it should be. He hadn’t led you astray yet.

He pulled you to the dance floor and you mimicked the other pairs, keeping one hand in his and placing the other on his shoulder. He wrapped his arm around your waist, yanking you closer to him.

The music started up again and Azriel began to lead you through the dance. It was easier than you thought it would be or perhaps he was just a good lead. Still, it wasn’t long before you were smiling and being twirled around in his arms.

You danced like that for a while, basking in the feeling. The soft music, the laughter, the gentle faelights above you. You had never felt so alive. And it was all thanks to the male who held you in his arms.

A slower song came on, some pairs leaving the dance floor. You looked around in question until you realized the pairs who had remained held a more intimate position. You copied them, placing your arms around Azriel’s neck.

Both of his arms wrapped around you now, resting on your lower back.

“Is this okay?” He leaned down to whisper in your ear.

You nodded, letting him drag you even closer until your bodies were pressed together. The dress you were wearing was thin and you could feel all of him through it. His hard chest, his sculpted muscles.

Azriel swallowed audibly, swaying you gently to the music. You laid your head on his chest, letting him rest his chin on top of your head. Every inch of you that touched him was on fire.

You closed your eyes for a moment, just letting yourself feel this, embrace it. You’d never felt like this before. So warm and light. It felt like it was just you and him that existed.

That is until you opened your eyes. You suddenly felt overwhelmed as you noticed lingering stares. A lot of them. You felt uncomfortable under the weight of them.

“What’s wrong?”

Azriel had some sort of sixth sense when it came to you. He always seemed to know what you were feeling before you said anything.

“Everyone’s looking at me,” you muttered under your breath, staring up at him.

He raised his head, looking around with narrowed eyes. That caused most of them to look away, not wanting to risk the shadowsinger’s wrath.

“Come on,” Azriel whispered. “I know somewhere we can go that’s more private.”

He enveloped you in his shadows until you were stepping out of the darkness and into a rounded alcove somewhere else on the balcony. Vines dangled down from the roof, trailing down the pillars holding it up.

You stepped forward, placing your hands against the stone railing. You could see the crowd below, the one you had just been in. Still hear the music and still see the night sky. You turned to face Azriel.

“Thank you,” you said. “I-I just hate it when they stare. Like I’m some weird creature.”

Azriel stalked forward until he was right in front of you, so close you had to tilt your head up to look him in the eyes.

“They don’t stare at you because they think you’re weird,” Azriel replied. “They stare at you because you are beautiful.”

His hand rose and brushed a strand of hair behind your ear. Your heart skipped a beat. Your mouth parted to say something but a roar of cheers cut you off. You whirled around to see thousands and thousands of stars beginning to soar through the sky.

Your mouth dropped open. It was more beautiful than you remembered. The stars kept falling and falling, like cascading fireworks. So bright and breathtaking. You couldn’t stop the small laugh that escaped your mouth, standing on your tippy toes to lean over the balcony as if you’d be able to reach the stars.

An arm circled your waist and Azriel’s front was pressed against your back as he held onto you.

“Careful,” he whispered in your ear, scared you were going to tip right over the edge and fall down the steep mountain.

“So beautiful,” you murmured, staring up at the stars. “Oh, it’s so much better than I remembered it from all those years ago.”

“It never stops amazing me,” Azriel said. “No matter how many times I watch it.”

You both watched in silence for a little longer, letting the music and laughter and cheers fill the space. Eventually, you turned in his arms, now pressed against the railing.

“Thank you,” you said again, “for bringing me here.”

“Anything for you,” Azriel whispered, raising a hand to rest on your cheek. His eyes were filled with a reverence that stole your breath away.

A brush of magic zipped by in the air and you gasped, raising up your wrist. The tattoo was gone. The bargain had been fulfilled. You had defeated Koschei and Azriel had given you the opportunity to live a life more than you had dreamed. That chance at life was in your hands now.

“The tattoo is gone,” you said, grasping his arm and pulling back his sleeve.

Your eyes widened to see his tattoo still there. The lunar moth emerging from the swirls of shadow.

“Wha—”

“I got it tattooed,” Azriel cut in. “Permanently.”

You glanced up at him in question. “Why?”

“Because I always want a reminder of what I promised you,” he said, his thumb stroking your cheek. “What I still promise you, y/n. A life worth living. I want to continue showing you the world, to be there when you experience new things.”

You were speechless. Completely, utterly speechless.

No one had ever shown such devotion to you, such care and love. Your heart swelled up, your chest ached.

“Azriel,” you stuttered out. “I-I don’t know what to say.”

“You don’t have to say anything,” he replied. “I was trapped in the darkness once too. I know what that’s like and I never want you to fall back into it. I don’t need anything from you, just the chance to be there with you while you learn, while you feel.”

Something was building inside of you, building and building until it was ready to break out. You rubbed at your chest, at the unusual feeling.

“I feel this…I feel this thing inside,” You said, gesturing to your chest. “Do you know what this is? Do you know why I feel this way?”

Azriel grabbed your hand and placed it on his chest, in the exact same spot yours ached.

“It is the mating bond,” Azriel answered, softly. “I feel it too. Right here. I have since the day I met you.”

His shadows swirled around like they had been waiting for this. You felt your own darkness rise in response until the two had joined together, watching together from the dark crevices.

“A mating bond,” you repeated.

Something snapped the moment you said it out loud. As if a question you had been asking your whole life had finally been answered. A gold thread was woven between the two of you, a beacon of light in the darkness. A place for that moth to call home.

You gasped looking back up at Azriel. Now that you recognized the bond, it grew more taut. You stumbled closer to him, fisting his coat in your hands.

“A mate,” you whispered. “You're my mate. I..I didn’t even know Gods could have mates.”

“Say it again.” Azriel’s voice was as dark as the shadows. A shiver ran down your spine.

“Huh?”

“Say it. Say that I’m your mate again.”

“You’re my mate,” you whispered, looking up at him through your lashes. “My mate.”

A quiet whine came from the back of Azriel’s throat that sent heat between your legs. Your eyes widened. A muscle in his jaw clenched. The air around you was charged and you felt like you had been set on fire.

“And you are mine,” Azriel growled. “My mate.”

His possessive tone only made that heat grow. Your lips parted, a small breath leaving your lungs. His eyes glanced down to your lips, hungrily. You gave him the smallest dip of the head, the permission he was waiting for.

Azriel surged forward and crashed his lips against yours. You stumbled, your backside hitting the stone railing behind you. You met his vigor with your own.

His lips were soft and warm. And his kiss felt like heaven and hell all mixed in one.

He groaned as you deepened the kiss, tilting your head back to give him more access. You yanked him closer, wanting to feel him everywhere. You never craved someone as much as you craved him.

His tongue swiped your bottom lip and you opened for him, letting him claim your mouth. His scent was intoxicating, he tasted like pure sin. You could drown yourself in him.

Your hands trailed up from his chest to circle around his neck. His own hands were holding you by the waist, pulling your hips into his. They traveled down your thighs until he was lifting you up, seating you on the stone railing, never pulled away from your kiss.

You parted your legs, letting Azriel step even closer as he finally pulled away, trailing kisses down your jaw to your neck. You whimpered at the feeling of his canines grazing the sensitive skin.

His nose traced the column of your throat before he rested his forehead against yours. You were both panting, both completely lost within each other.

“Wait,” Azriel breathed out, squeezing his eyes shut for a second. “I got you something. I don’t want to forget to give it to you.”

Because he would. He would forget his own name as long as the sweet scent of your arousal filled the air. Would forget the whole world existed if you kept staring at him like you were.

He pulled a small black box from his pocket, handing it over to you.

You opened it, gasping at the beautiful ring displayed inside. It was made of gold with a mesmerizing amethyst gem in the shape of a teardrop, accentuated by crescent moons on both sides and tiny stars.

“Azriel,” you breathed out. “This is beautiful.”

A small smile ghosted his lips.

“May I?”

You held out your hand and he pulled the ring out of the box before sliding it onto your ring finger. It was the perfect fit. You admired it, twisting it under the faelights to see the gem glow.

“It’s perfect,” you sighed.

“I had it made just for you,” Azriel said. “It’s what I had to pick up in the city today.”

“I-I really don’t know what to say, Azriel.”

Azriel rested his forehead against yours. “Just say it again. Tell me you feel this too. I’ve been searching for you for over five hundred years now and I just need to hear you say it. Again and again. Until I can wrap my head around it. Until I realize I’m not dreaming.”

You smiled, lifting up to press a small kiss against his lips. Your heart fluttered in your chest at his words, at the realization of why exactly the bargain had been fulfilled. You had asked for someplace to be safe, for a home, a chance to live. Azriel was giving you all of that and more.

“You are my mate. And I am yours,” you murmured against his lips. You pulled back to look him in the eyes. “All I’ve ever wanted was to find somewhere to call home. Being with you, being in your arms—that feels like home to me, Azriel. The one I’ve been looking for my whole life.”

Azriel’s eyes searched yours, as if he was trying to find the lie in your words. But there was none. Of course there was none. You were falling in love with him.

“Does this mean you want it?”

“It means I want you. I want all of you, everything.”

Azriel smiled and the sight nearly blew you away. You giggled as he held you close to him, buried his face in the crook of your neck. He kissed your throat once, twice.

“Then I think we’re due for a long vacation,” he murmured against your skin.

You knew what he was referring to. The frenzy that would come with this. Just that thought alone caused a tantalizing ache between your thighs.

“I think so too,” you whispered back as Azriel pressed kisses up your neck and jaw.

He held your face in his hands, his thumbs brushing against your skin as he stared into your eyes. His gaze was filled with so much promise, so much love. And then he kissed you again and everything felt right in the world. You were home.

#acotar #azriel #fanfic #acotar fanfiction #acotar x reader #acotar x you #azriel x reader #azriel x you #azriel shadowsinger #azriel fluff #azriel fanfic #azriel imagine #azriel fic #bryaxis #request

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https-yeonjun · 3 months

Text

oh, baby (c.bg)

wc. 1149

genre. smut

request. trying to get pregnant w beomgyu so y'all have been having sex nonstop everytime you're ovulating

tags. husband!beomgyu x fem!reader, breeding kink, pet names (baby), implied kitchen sex, implied shower sex, unprotected sex (lol duh), impreg kink, pussy drunk beomgyu, (slight) marking, manhandling (if you turn your head to the side and squint), mommy used twice non-sexually

a/n. repost; i was thinking about this nonstop since i saw the request anon i need to kiss your brain. you sent this over almost two month ago i'm sorry it took so long but i hope you enjoy <;333 thank you to @sunnylovespickles and @huenation for helping me read this and organize my thoughts

more of my work

you and beomgyu had been married for a year and a half when he finally brought up the idea of having kids with you. you were scrolling through your feed in bed one night when you stumbled upon a post from an old classmate at her baby shower. beomgyu absentmindedly responded, i bet our kids would look cuter, prompting the very serious and incredibly long overdue conversation about one day growing your little family. and after that night and some doctor’s appointments, he was determined to get you all pretty and round before the end of the year.

one thing about beomgyu is that he genuinely cannot keep his hands off of you. so on a sunday morning, when he wakes up to an empty space in the bed beside him, he searches for you all over the house before stumbling into you in the kitchen. he sees you making pancakes and can’t help but think about your kids one day running around, helping you cook, and setting the table. he wraps his hands around your waist from behind, his hard cock prodding your ass. nuzzling his head into your neck, he mumbles, good morning, baby. you hum in response, melting into his touch. he takes this as an opportunity to slyly turn off the stove. you whine his name, protesting for him to let you finish cooking. but that doesn’t stop him from pulling you towards the island and hoisting you up on the counter. he looks up at you with a smirk. you’re the only thing i wanna eat this morning, baby.

a few days later you find beomgyu sitting at his desk when you come home from the gym, he glances up at you but his eyes can’t help but stop at your chest glistening with sweat, your boobs spilling out of your tight sports bra. and of course that naturally leads him to fantasize about what your boobs would look like when you’re pregnant, so swollen and so so beautiful. going to take a shower, then we can figure dinner out. you tell him as you retreat to the bathroom. it’s not up to five minutes later when you hear the shower curtain open, your husband slides in behind you. if we’re gonna have a baby, we should start saving on our water bill, don’t you think?

but beomgyu wasn’t the only one who was entirely insatiable. some days, like today for instance, when you spend the entire work day thinking about your husband and how much you need him to fuck you, the last thing you want to see when you come home are his friends sitting around your living room. internally groaning, you wave to them while signaling to beomgyu to follow you into the bedroom.

“your friends.” you state one the two of you are in the privacy of your room.

“what about them?” he asks, his face marked with confusion. you give him a look that conveyed frustration and yearning and the realization dawns on him.

“aww,” he coos. “does someone need me?”

“please can you just tell them to go home?” you whine and without hesitation he leaves the room. you sink into the bed for what feels like an eternity until beomgyu saunters back into the room towards you.

“took you long enough.” you mumble as you pull him closer to you.

“i was gone for five minutes.” he chuckles in response.

“felt like twenty.” you reach up to kiss him passionately, your hands trailing up his torso, taking his t-shirt up with it.

“can we–” he tries to break away from this kiss. “can we slow down?”

“need you so bad.” you mumble against his lips.

“yeah?” he asks coyly.

“yeah,” your hands race to unbutton your work pants. “need you to fuck a baby in me.” beomgyu’s eyes widened. sure, you had both agreed to try for a baby but to hear you say this so explicitly just confirmed for him that his desires to start a family with you weren’t one sided. beomgyu joins you in taking off your clothes, his hands swiftly unbuttoning your shirt, nearly ripping the buttons off.

you’re laying in bed clad in nothing, with beomgyu hovering above you. his gaze falls upon you, tracing your form, as if you were the most alluring thing he’d ever seen.

“you’re so beautiful,” he breathes out before leaning down to kiss you. “i know i joke a lot,” he confesses between kisses. “but i want this so bad. you, us, our family. everything.”

he slips his throbbing cock between your warm folds causing you to let out a soft gasp. “me too. i want you. everything.” you parrot his words. he steadily grinds his hip against yours as he stares into your eyes and for a moment it seems like it’s only the two of you in the world.

loosely wrapping your arms around his neck, you pull him down into a kiss. your hands explore the contours of his body trying to find the best way to keep him in your grasp, to make sure that this was not an eerily realistic dream and he was actually here with you, in you. “i love you.” you moan out clenching around him.

his eyes close shut and a groan erupts from his throat when he feels your walls tighten around him. “fuck, your so… so tight baby.”

beomgyu accelerates his thrusts, his movements becoming sloppier and messier by the second. your hands find themselves resting on the nape of his neck, playing with his hair. he hides his face in the crook of your neck, taking this as an opportunity to paint your skin with marks in between the sloppy kisses he was leaving.

as he inches closer to his climax, you feel his movements slow down as he fucks deeper into you. he’s trying to prolong his orgasm, trying to feel you around him for longer. “m’gonna cum, baby. gonna get you all pretty and pregnant for me. gonna make you a mommy tonight.”

his eyes clouded over as his movements became weaker and hips began to stutter. you let out a loud moan, your eyes fluttering closed when you felt him pumping his load deep inside you, filling you up with his seed.

still inside of you, beomgyu rolls over so you are laying on top of him. he caresses your hair, whispering i love yous between kisses on your forehead. you rest like that, tangled in each others’ arms, for a moment before you convince him to take a shower with you. when you actually get pregnant, you make it a routine to look at your baby bump in the mirror every morning. beomgyu sitting in front of you, tenderly caressing your round belly before pressing a loving kiss and murmuring something about you being the prettiest mommy in the world.

taglist: @atinyniki @boba-beom @dearlyjun @wiisoob @isabellah29

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#fay's works #txt smut #tomorrow x together #beomgyu #beomgyu smut #choi beomgyu #txt x reader #beomgyu x reader

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biibini · 4 months

Text

nsfw modern!mizu headcannons

a/n: i cannot contain the voices anymore. also 100+ likes on last headcannon???? holy shi i love u all

if u guys have any modern!mizu ideas, feel free to send them over! i’d love to read them all <3

nsfw 18+ content ahead!

oh boy where do i begin

modern!mizu wants u to use ur words

typically for safety as well as to get a rise out of u

she always reminds u of the safe word before anything happens

every time like clockwork

u tease her a few times ab how it’s like a script

she wants both of u to have fun while sticking to ur comfort zones

(always use a safeword 🫶)

besides safety, she loves it when u become vocal

whether it’s a simple stutter or moan slipping out, she loves to hear noises come out of her girl

when u two are making out, if a moan slips out between ur lips, she can read u so easily

modern!mizu is also vocal herself

hello? episode 5???

it would probably be a mix of moans and praise to u

she loves seeing ur reaction every time she praises u

ur reactions are almost like a drug to her

seeing ur mouth turn to an ‘o’ or any sudden changes in ur breathing are the little things that make her keep praising u

if the reaction is u getting more soaking wet, she gets so turn on

however if u go down on her, she would be rambling on and on ab how good ur doing

it would all turn into mush and she would eventually fold

finding herself trying to continue the praising but end up saying incoherent words, moaning under ur touch

speaking of wet

modern!mizu is always a little surprised with how wet u can get under her touch

it rlly turns her on so much

whether it’s her lips kissing and leaving dark red marks on ur sensitive neck

or light squeezes her fingers would make as she massages the outer part of ur thighs

her hands slowly inching towards the softer, inner section

once she starts inching closer to ur wet mess, she likes to keep u close by hooking her arms around ur thighs

she can make sure she can see u in full view

and totally not let u escape

ur not escaping from those arms

(yes ive stated this in the last headcannon but cmon its so good)

it always leaves u in a moaning mess

and her with ur juices all over her mouth and chin and her fingers too

if it’s just her hands moving, she’ll constantly remind u to loosen up ur legs so they stay open

“Y/N, I’m still here hon.” She chuckled, tapping the inside of ur thigh. You nod, letting go of ur legs and opening up. This was her third time reminding you tonight.

You take a peek at her work, looking down as her middle and ring finger continue to enter your insides at a slow pace. Mizu’s attention shifted from you down to her work, searching for your most sensitive spot. Her fingers start to pull out from your throbbing walls again, entering you in one deep thrust.

“Mizu!” You yelp. Only a hum comes out of Mizu as she continues to push her fingers in and out of your gushing mess. Your juices continue to cover her two digits as they pump at a faster pace, hitting deeper in ur core.

modern!mizu would never admit it to u but it would be so easy for her to get off to the sound of ur voice

when u had an out-of-state summer internship, she was excited for ur new adventures

however, both of u failed to realize how lonely the summer would be (horny wise)

she tried to stay patient by keeping herself busy at home with eiji or at the gym while u were at ur internship during the day

she would always get reminders of u whenever she looked at ur phone or the plushie u won on one of ur dates

during the night was more difficult with an empty bed

she thought she could stay patient

keyword: thought

she was on edge for most of the 6 weeks you were gone and nearly threw a basketball at taigen

whenever u guys would call at the end of the week to catch up, she was thankful every week that u werent sharing a room with anyone

it was ur first time trying out phone sex at the end of ur first week

u became a very big fan.

hearing mizu guide u with her voice, almost shaky from how much she’s been holding back this week

on the last week, she was running out of patience and being more dominant than usual

typically during sex, u would hear a lot of praise from her end of the line

but this week, she edged the line of degradation

it was rlly fucking hot

“S’good for me, baby.”

“Pump those fingers faster, like how I would.”

You were a sweaty mess, lying on your bed on one of the final nights in the city. Lights off, your phone was lying next to you, deep into an 25 minute call turned phone sex with Mizu. Your fingers were pleasuring you, trying to remember the rhythm of your lover from back home.

Sticking to Mizu’s words, you began to move your fingers faster. Your pussy was dripping wet, still remembering the vague feeling of Mizu’s long, slender fingers. She was able to push inside you much deeper. Your core starts to remember the similar pace, pleasure rising in you.

On the other hand, your mind replaces your current situation as if Mizu was physically next to you. One hand caressing your cheek while the other was exploring deep inside you. Her body above you, her blue eyes almost glowing in the moonlight.

“M-Mizu…” You let out loud, your phone barely catching your voice. Eyes closed, you were trying to focus on your imagination.

“Y/N…” Mizu said, nearly whispering into her phone. She knew her dad could knock out but the walls at home were thin.

Mizu could only hear faint moans and whimpers from her end as she was using a toy you used on her a few times.

As she got closer, she started to turn up the volume. But it did little to no change as your melody continued to pour out.

“Baby I’m getting close. What about you?”

Only a whimper arose out of her phone. You were way too into your recreation to recognize Mizu asking a question.

“Baby?”

“Mmhmm…”

“Are you trying to remember my fingers again?”

“Yes.” You stuttered out. You could barely speak as you fastened your pace, feeling a familiar warmth build up.

“My baby misses me- ah- so much hm?” Mizu said, fastening her pace as well, trying to match your pleasure levels.

Louder moans only came out of your mouth. You could feel your fingers get tightened more and more, your insides getting ready to spasm out.

“Fuck- my Y/N fucking herself on her fingers? My little slut.”

Hearing her call you her little slut was your breaking point. Your insides start to spasm and lose control of your imagination. Your hips bucking & grinding into your fingers, still pumping into you with little energy you had.

All Mizu could hear from her phone was your cries, moans, and your voice continuously crying her name out loud. She quickly finished as you cried her name one last time, panting into the phone.

#bes mizu #mizu bes #mizu blue eye samurai #mizu x reader #blue eye samurai #blue eye samurai mizu #headcanon #mizu headcanons #mizu x y/n #mizu x you #blue eye samurai x you #blue eye samurai x reader #mizu x reader smut #smut #blue eye samurai smut

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jakescakeislateforourdate · 2 months

Note

Hey girly!! Im too shy to ask this without the anonymous filter but first of all I’ve been reading through your blog and I love it honestly. I was wondering if you are open to requests if you’d be able to write up something about joe rantz (I am absolutely LIVING for blonde callum) and maybe a coaches daughter trope? he saw her when he went to sign himself up, at the practices all that jazz and just them like becoming friends then more than friends, the boat scene where he gets his seat taken away from him maybe? thank you so much and again I love your work! xx

Hello, my lovely anon. Glad to see you in my inbox. I apologize for the wait but I've been coming out of an awful slump and I was trying to make this piece not total garbage. I hope you enjoy it and I hope I see you in my inbox again.

Two Steps Forward, One Step Back

Joe Rantz (Callum Turner’s) x reader

wc: 4,600

Joe finds himself utterly gobsmacked when he discovers that the pretty face he’s seen at the shell house is the coach’s daughter and not his wife.

Enjoy this garbage!

…

Joe Rantz had come to the shell house in search of work. He’d hoped that making the team would cover his tuition and get him a room and he needed it so desperately. Roger Morris stood next to him, chewing nervously at his nails. “Sorry, Joe, didn’t realize competition would be so tight.” He mutters, spitting out a shred of his fingernail. Coach Ulbrickson was going over the basics of practice. It sounded like absolute hell to Joe but he was out of options. He fidgeted with the number painted on his jersey. Sure, he was strong from a lifetime of rough labor but so were the other boys. Most of them were broke too and just as desperate. Joe didn’t know if he had what it took to stand out but he’d be damned if he couldn’t make a life for himself because he couldn’t muscle up some money for college.

As Ulbrickson speaks, a shadow appears in his office window. It’s too far for Joe’s nervous gaze to actually study the figure. He tries to focus on coach but the shadow continues to draw his attention. Roger notices too. “Who the hell is that?” Joe just shrugs. The shadow never leaves the window even as Ulbrickson finishes up and the boys get split up. Joe can’t dwell on the figure any longer because he’s being herded into the middle of shellhouse. He begins a horrible set of workouts. His body is made for hard work but he’s never actually worked out before. His muscles aren’t used to straining this way.

It’s not long before his breathing becomes labored and sweat is pouring down his back. His curls hang down his forehead, sticking to his skin uncomfortably. And just when the pain is becoming unbearable the coaches are swapping them out and Joe is put on a junky old boat and an oar is pushed into his hands. They start rowing and instantly, the only thing on Joe’s mind is how bad his back hurts. Pained grunts and groans echo across the water as the boys struggle to keep pulling the oars.

Eventually, it’s all over. Joe stumbles onto the dock in front of the shellhouse and feels his knees shaking with excursion. Men begin to drain away from the shellhouse and as the numbers dwindle, the shadow in the window of Ulbrickson’s office reappears. It moves through the glass panes like a swan through water. Then the office door opens and Joe sees your face for the first time.

“That was some tough practice, huh?” Roger bumps Joe’s shoulder, a crooked smile on his face. Joe cannot respond and Roger follows his gaze. “Washington, Washington, what finery you enjoy.”

You descend the steps and take a place between Ulbrickson and Bolles. Ulbrickson puts and arm around and Joe feels his heart wither a little. You’re probably Mrs. Ulbrickson. Though he can’t shake the impression that you look a little too young to be with Ulbrickson.

“Alas,” Roger throws up his hands, “Finery we cannot also enjoy.”

“Don’t be crass.”

“I’m not! How was that crass?” Roger purses his lips and nudges Joe.

Joe just buttons up his jacket and picks up his books, “C’mon, let’s get outta here.”

The very next day, Joe is suffering through practice. He aches all over and his muscles scream at him. He’s already shaking when he gets done with the basic strength building exercises. Most of the boys are. There are fewer numbers today but this does not better Joe’s odds by much. They clamber into Old Nero and start rowing away. His wrists twinge and his knees spasm. He rows and rows until he thinks his body will give out and then Ulbrickson is directing them back to the shellhouse. Jow crawls out of the boat, soaked to the bone and stiff as a board.

Then he sees you again, this time your sorting registry papers with Pocock. Your back is turned to him, so you don’t notice his longing stare. He keeps telling himself that you’re a married lady and that he should be focused on making the team, but nothing seems to chase you from his mind.

Coach Ulbrickson sweeps across the dock and places a hand on top of your head, an odd gesture between husband and wife but Joe wouldn’t know about those things. Since his group was the last to use Old Nero, they get the privilege of stowing the oars. Joe begins unlatching the mechanism when he shifts on his knees.

It happens so fast he can’t clock what’s happening. First there’s the sensation of slipping, the horrible thrust of his legs flying out from beneath him. He twists mid slip, and his side smacks the dock painfully before he’s swept off the dock by his own weight. He plumets into the cold water with a catastrophic splash and agonized shriek.

When Joe resurfaces a dozen hands are reaching for him. He grasps onto George Hunt’s forearm and allows Shorty to hoist him onto the sodden wood planks. A fluffy white towel is draped around his shoulders; firm hands rub his chilled biceps. “Are you alright?” You face appears before him.

Joe is almost too stunned to speak, “I—yeah, yeah I’m okay.”

You tuck the ends of the towel into his hands, “Better get showered up and dressed.” Joe just nods and stumbles past you and into the locker room. Roger follows closely behind, teasing Joe relentlessly.

“You’re fallin’ harder than I thought.”

“Roger!” Joe grinds his teeth, huffing and puffing. “You need better jokes.”

Joe spends that night struggling to focus on his schoolwork. He has math homework that needs doing. He has books to read. The one in his hands now periodically goes in and out of focus as Joe’s mind wanders. On the page is the story of a western novel, a man had found a girl walking alone the road at dusk, all on her own. He didn’t want to leave her to the coyotes, so he offered her a ride into the nearest town. They were riding horseback across the prairie. Her arms wound tightly around him; her hands splayed over his chest.

Her hands—

What is wrong with you, Joe?

Joe reads this line over and over again. Each time he nears the end his brain short circuits and all he can think about are your hands on your shoulders. You hadn’t even really touched him, at least not his skin. Yet the only thing shooting through his neurons are the sensations of your fingers along his skin. That imaginary touch he can conjure up so perfectly. He eventually gives in and skips down a few paragraphs. He reads late into the night and the phantom touches are still nagging his senses when he closes the book and rolls over to sleep.

…

Day after day, Joe sees you at practice. You congratulate him when he makes the team and help him with his technique every once and a while. “Roll your wrists just a bit more.” Your fingers would poke at his forearms and direct him in graceful strokes. It fries his brain. You give pointers to the rest of the team too, working closely with Bolles and Pocock to get them in racing shape. It’s not long into the season when Ulbrickson decides to switch coxswains.

“This is Bobby Moch. Your new jockey.” Bolles announces one day. Bobby is short and slender and sharp tongued. The second he climbs in the boat and starts barking out commands, Joe is flabbergasted. Who is Bobby to talk to the team this way? But they all find themselves obeying his every word. What really irks Joe about Bobby is how friendly he is with you. You exchange jokes and poke fun at each other. Joe tells himself that he just thinks it’s inappropriate to flirt with the coach’s wife but beneath it all he’s incredibly jealous that Bobby can make you laugh so easily. It makes Joe pine for attention in a way that he never has before.

The day of their race against California, Joe is all jitters and nerves. He bounces on the balls of his feet and shakes his hands, trying to loosen the anxiety. Streamers and garlands of flags decorate the locker room and the campus. People have gathered in clusters along the course and wave flags of purple and gold. The smell of popcorn and peanuts permeates the air and Joe promises to indulge himself if they win.

As the crew carried their shell down to the water, they begin chanting to themselves. “Bow down to Washington!” They neglect the varsity’s jeers and clip their oars into position. They spot Coach Ulbrickson in the stands, you at his side. And then there’s another woman. And Ulbrickson hugs her. And then he kisses her.

Right in front of you! What is going on?

“Rantz! Eyes on me!” Bobby hollers. But Joe can’t help stealing another confused glance. “I said quite drooling over coach’s daughter and LOOK AT ME!”

Joe feels like an idiot. He puts his head down in shame and tightens his grip on the oar. Ulbrickson joins them on the dock and gives one of his famously encouraging speeches. Joe is only half paying attention. They push off and are left with lovely Bobby hyping them up while they wait for the race to start. They lean forward, like a bow drawn for a shot. And then the white flag flies and the boats shoot away from the docks.

There’s nothing but blur as Joe rows. He can only focus on the muscled shoulders of Don Hume in the stroke seat as Bobby screams at them. “28!”

About halfway through the course, Bobby demands the stroke rate be upped and Don performs. The shell lurches forward, eating up the distance between Washington and Cal until the JV boat surpasses the Berkeley blokes. Then the boat is cutting across the finish line, a clean win. Adrenaline rushes Joe’s veins. He throws his fists in the air as the team splashes and roars. They’re inevitably drowned out by the crowd who bursts up in a shower of peanuts and Washington flags.

Coach Ulbrickson, the new woman Joe assumes his Ulbrickson’s wife, and you rush the dock as the boys climb out of the boat. “Excellent job.” Mrs. Ulbrickson shakes their hands as they unclip their oars. Bolles is compassionate enough to give them each a pat on the back as they hoist the boat over their heads and haul it off.

Joe can’t help but notice the copious amounts of onlookers pooling around the shell as they carry it back to the shellhouse. They set it down on the stands and before they can even take their hands off the shell, they are bombarded by Washington fans. Girls reaching out to stroke their biceps or kiss their cheeks. Joe has never received attention like this once in his life. He’s as polite as possible, brushing off a few girls here and there and shaking the hand of the occasional fellow. Shorty has accumulated a few lipstick stains on his cheek. Don Hume is blushing from the tips of his ears down to the point of his freckled nose. Chuck and Roger accept a few hugs. They bask in the winners’ glory for only a few moments until the varsity team strolls by. They make a comment to Moch that Joe doesn’t catch but judging by the way Bobby’s shoulders square he can make obvious conclusions.

“You rowed so well today, Joe.” He hears your voice, and his palms start to sweat.

“Thanks, I uh—” It occurs to him that he doesn’t actually know a thing about you. “Sorry, I don’t think I’ve ever gotten your name.” You smile at him, and syllables fall out but the crowd is too loud. “What?” Your grasp his shoulder and lean in, the sound of your name echoes off the shell of his ear.

When you pull away, you’re still smiling but before Joe can ask you another question, Bobby is buzzing by with a play-by-play of exactly what happened in Bobby’s world.

You shade your eyes and peer down at the docks, “Looks like dad is almost done with the varsity. I should get down there.” You say, and Bobby turns around to talk to Shorty. “Hey. Will I see you at the party tonight?” Your hand rests on Joe’s shoulder. He prays you can’t feel his heart skip a beat.

“Yeah, yeah. I’ll be there.”

“Good. You had better save a dance for me, Joe Rantz.”

You leave him breathless, the butterflies in his stomach so vicious that he shudders. He watches you disappear down the pathway to the dock and his heart starts hammering with anticipation. You want to dance with him. You want to touch his hands, touch him. And then he remembers that you already did that, he was too focused on the motion of your lips that he’d hardly registered the sensation of your hands on his arm. Damn! What had it felt like? He’d remembered it’d made him flabbergasted and choked his speech but he couldn’t remember how the grooves in your palm felt as they brushed over his skin. The warmth of your fingertips. He curses himself out and vanishes into the locker room to get changed.

…

The dance rolls around rather too quickly and Joe is swimming in nerves. He has to tie his tie twice because he messes up so badly, he can’t even draw it tight to his neck. Roger found out all too quickly and hasn’t let Joe catch a break.

“A date with coach’s daughter. Careful Joe, Ulbrickson might throw you off the team if he catches the wrong look in your eye.”

“Shut up, Roger, I’m not greasy like you”

“Ouch, that hurts me.”

“Clearly not enough.” Joe hisses as he finally gets his tie right.

“Feels like I’m a father about to send his kid off to prom.”

Joe sighs and throws on his suit coat. “Oh, please—”

“Look at you fly, shooting out of your league.”

Roger works a smile onto Joe’s face, and they set off for the party. Spring is finally warming the campus up from a brutal winter and a few couples mull around outside. Joe and Roger find their way into the crowded gymnasium, both shocked by just how loud it is. Joe can’t even hear his own thoughts. They spot the team almost immediately, clustered around tables, drinks in their hands. A few of the boys are dancing with some lovely dames, a few are leaned against the wall having close conversations. Don is sitting by himself on a bench a few feet away from the refreshment table, watching the dance floor. Joe is turning to follow Roger towards the other boys but an arm loops through his, “Thought you weren’t going to show.” You practically shout.

Joe can’t help but grin as you capture his attention. “You weren’t joking.”

“Not a bit, Rantz, didn’t have any other dancing plans except for this one.”

“Guess I should make it worth your wait then.” Joe leads you into the thicket of bodies.

He prides himself on the laugh you let out, “please do,” you say as he takes your hands and spins to face you. He places his hand high on your waist and cradles the other gently in his palm. He can feel the smooth plains of you hand against his. Each crease and each callous. His are no doubt unbelievably rough from the rowing and he would feel bad but right now all he can feel are your fingers lacing through his. “You’re not half bad.” You tease. Joe knows his cheeks are heating up to a flaming red. Probably his ears too.

His hand migrates to the small of your back as the music changes into a soft slow song. “I’ll be completely honest,” he starts, “I had no idea you were the coach’s daughter.”

“Then who else would I be?”

“I thought you were his wife.” He looks away sheepishly, but your laughter is so unrestrained and whole that Joe’s heart melts. You can’t stop laughing either and it’s contagious.

“You’re an engineering student, right?” Your shoes brush as you sway with him.

“Yeah, how’d you know?”

“Joyce.” Joe’s heart drops. In his infatuation he’d forgotten all about her. “She was trying to hit on you, but she figured out that your attention was elsewhere.”

“You too are good friends then?”

“Just since the start of the year. We have an English class together.” You and Joe talk for a while, it forces you to be close and neither of you care to separate. Eventually, you move outside and sit with sit with Joe on the steps of the gym. It’s still chilly out and you sit close to Joe which he doesn’t mind one bit. At some point your head rests on his shoulder and you close your eyes. Joe can do nothing but stare down at you, his mouth agape.

“Why is your heart beating so fast?” You trace his knuckles with your pointer finger.

Joe’s head pounds, his mouth dry, “This has never happened to me before.”

“None of the girls from high school? Never?”

“Not one.”

You look up at Joe and reach to smooth back a blond curl. “Shame, they were missing out.” This makes Joe smile again and he’s immensely pleased with how easily you do that to him. Make him happy. He hasn’t felt like this since… he can’t remember when. Sure, he was happy when the team won but that was different. That was pride. So was making the team. This feels more affectionate, closer to the heart. He wonders if this is what love feels like but that would be silly; he’s only known your name for a day. He’s also never been flattered quite like this. Besides Joyce, he can’t think of anyone else who’s actually been interested in him. Certainly not one who compliments him the way you do.

People start to drain out of the gym very slowly and Joe checks his watch. “So late already?”

“Guess I should get home; my dad will be wrought with worry.” You joke and straighten out your skirt.

“Can I walk you home?”

“I would love that.”

Joe offers you his hand, “Where does coach live?”

“Not too far.” You accept his calloused hand and direct him off campus. Surprisingly, Joe has read the book you’re reading for English and time flies as you discuss the book. Then Joe makes a sobering comment that makes you stop and study him.

“His parents remind me of my own.”

Joe realizes what he’s let slip, “Don’t worry about it too much. I’m okay.”

“Can I ask what happened?”

Joe presses his lips into a line and stares down at his worn shoes. A wave of self-consciousness washes over him as he realizes how ragged of a life he has lived and just how much it shows. “Well—”

“Is this why you have a hard time trusting your team?”

“Hey now,”

“Sorry.” You take his hands.

He grimaces and squeezes your soft palms. “Is it that obvious?”

“Yes.”

Joe sighs and swipes a thumb across your knuckles. “My Pops just… left me one day. Told me I’d be fine on my own.” Joe gives you parts of the story. Mostly what he feels like stomaching at the moment.

When he’s finished you let go of his hands and cup his cheeks. He sinks into the touch, soaking it up like a flower budding in sunlight. You don’t say anything, you just look at him. You look at him like he’s the only thing that’s ever mattered and his heart trembles because he has never once known what it’s like to be that for someone else. And then you stand on tip toes and plant a hearty kiss on his forehead. “This is it actually,” you gesture behind you at the hosue that must be the Ulbricksons’. “I’ll see you tomorrow at practice?”

“Yeah.” The spot on his forehead that you kissed tingles. “Nowhere else I’d want to be.”

…

The Poughkeepsie Regatta rolls around all too quickly and Ulbrickson has to make a decision. The varsity boat who deserves it. Or the JV boat who could win it. His hands sweat as he stands on at that pulpit and reads off his preplanned speech. As he talks, he thinks about the future of the rowing program. The jobs it has provided him and Bolles. About how Pocock would have to find work elsewhere and it’d kill Al Ulbrickson to send him away.

He leans into the mic and spits, “and that boat is our JV boat.” It has to be them. They have to win. Moans and groans blow his way as the crowd rejects his announcement. Regret washes over him but he cannot take this back. He has to be right about his crew. He tips his hat and hustles off the podium as the JV bursts into celebration. He has to be right.

…

Joe is more than pleased to see you on the train to Poughkeepsie. He slides into the car with you, and you chat away. You were fast friends the night of the dance and have since become closer. The kiss on the forehead still lingers sometimes, especially when Joe sees your lips form your smile. You entice him into some card games and eventually a game of chess. At some point, he decides that he needs to sleep and bids you goodnight so that he can find a train car to sleep in. But before he does, he sneaks a chaste kiss onto your knuckles.

His good mood is stamped out the very next day when the team takes to the water. They don’t row good, and frustration starts to build. Bobby and the coaches try and get them working together, telling them that it’s just nerves and new water. But tensions rise regardless. The days start to dwindle, and the crew is getting worse and worse.

Blame starts to turn to him, and Joe is at a loss. He doesn’t want to believe that he’s holding the team back, but he thinks back to what you said that night he walked you home. But the most awful feeling creeps over him, not an ounce of care. What’s wrong with him. This crew has been the only family he’s had in years. He needs them. But he can’t bring himself to admit it.

Before he knows it, it slips and Ulbrickson is exiling him from the boat. As the crew watches Joe storm away, their spare crawls in and they set off for another row. Bolles taps you on the shoulder, “you had better see if you can do anything. Enlist Pocock if you have to.” Your father nods along.

You set out to find him, not that it was hard there’s not many places he can go alone. He’s stuffing his suitcase when you find him. “Don’t start.” He snaps. Then he sees your expression and his anger sours. “I’m sorry. Shouldn’t—”

“Don’t give up on your team, Joe.”

“I’m not.”

“You are, you’re quitting and throwing everything you’ve worked for away.”

“Don’t, don’t even start to pretend you know me.” He realizes too late that he’s made everything so much worse and before he can fix a thing Pocock is at the door.

“I could use some help putting another coat of oil on the shell.”

You duck past Pocock and leave Joe with a painful pit of remorse in his stomach. He follows Pocock and takes the talking to straight to the heart. As he lathers on a thick coat of oil, he figures he can bargain with Ulbrickson in the morning, but he should make a proper apology to you now. He racks his brain for anything that would make it right, but he’s horrifically inexperienced and it’s crippling him now. He feels like a child having a tantrum. He feels miniscule and insignificant.

After Joe dunks his brush into the whale oil can for the last time, he figures he’d better just confront the issue head on since he has no way of handling it delicately. He has no grace and he’s sure you’re aware of this. Pocock gives him an encouraging pat and takes the can from him. Joe winds his way back to the hotel and through the halls. Your room is on the second floor, third door down. He knocks gently, eyes lingering on the hideous carpet and tacky sconces. The door swings open after a moment and Joe is met with your disapproving glower. His tongue seems to swell in his mouth so badly that he worries it’ll flop out when he tries to speak.

“Coffee?” You ask when you realize he will stand there silently forever if you don’t let him in.

“No… I just wanted to—to apologize.”

“Oh really.” Your eyebrow quirks.

Joe is fumbling for words. You stand aside and motion for him to step inside so you can have this discussion in privacy. “I know that was wrong to take out my frustration on you. That wasn’t fair and none of it is your fault.” He twiddles his thumbs. How does he go about this without absolutely butchering it? “I just—” As he trails off, he notices a hurt dullness in your eyes. He recognizes it as pity. “You and the crew are really all I’ve got, and I’m so scared I’m going to lose it.”

“These boys aren’t going to leave you behind unless you separate yourself from them like today.”

“I know.

“Really?”

“Pocock made sure I know.”

The edges of your lips tilt up. You pull him down onto the foot of the bed and take his hand. “Are you actually going to try and trust them?”

“Don’t have enough faith to put it in anyone else.”

You squeeze his hand and trace a finger along his jawline, sweeping a knuckle under his chin. You force his stubborn gaze to you and find nothing but desperation. Wanting things like this doesn’t come natural to Joe and it shows, but he’s not so different from the other boys in that boat.

You reach up and fiddle with a curl, “apology accepted.” Tears pool in the corners of his eyes and he tries to choke them down. You place a hand on his chest and rest your forehead on his. His breath fans over your cheeks. The tip of his nose brushes yours. His shoulders sag inwards and he reaches for your waist.

“Can I—may I kiss you?”

Joe’s sweetness never fails to amaze you. You cradle his face and bring him closer. “Yes, Joe.” His breath hitches and his lips finally meet yours for the very first time. He’s gentle but generous and lets you kiss him for as long as you like. His arms wrap around you fully and hold you to his chest. He gets the feeling that he’ll be craving these moments all the time now, finally understanding what Roger and Chuck rave about. He’s hooked on your lips and your weight against him and when you pull away it breaks his heart.

“You should get cleaned up before you talk to my father, you smell like whale oil.”

...

Dear Reader,

Thank you for reading this. If you'd like to request, feel free to do so. I always love you in my inbox. I hope you enjoyed this fic and if you like it please check out my masterlist for more. Have nice day.

-the author

#boys in the boat #Joe rantz #callum turner #joe rantz x reader #callum turner x reader

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thatfreshi · 7 months

Text

"He Can't Have You" (Astarion x Reader)

Seems as though Auntie Ethel doesn't go down without a fight, and that fight involves bringing out the worst in people's minds. (Also we get to see where the nickname Aster came from)

tw - mentions of abuse, panic attack

The Sunny Wetlands, later revealed to be a putrid swamp, have proven particularly difficult for Astarion. The last thing any of you expected was to find a Gur hunting him, especially this far from the city. It made your heart skip a beat, hearing the monster hunter utter his name, and you could feel the tension in the vampire. Thankfully, you did away with him quickly. By now, he's told you plenty about his past, at least as much as he could bear to tell. That haunting feeling though, knowing that Cazador was hunting him, it was paralyzing. As you searched for Mayrina, you and Astarion fell behind the rest of the group.

"Are you alright my love? I could tell them we should just set up camp for the night, rest up for dealing with the hag."

"Nonsense. What would I look like, asking everyone to stop for me? The Gur has been dealt with, let's just leave it at that darling."

"I cannot imagine dealing with the hag will be easy though."

"I'll simply run my blade through her like I do everything else. I'll be fine."

It hasn't been long enough with him to truly know if he's lying, but you certainly have a hunch. On the way back to the hag's house, Gale casts detect magic.

"She's definitely in here. We should be prepared."

Sure, she looked like a sad old woman, but those adventurers told you the truth, how she took their sister. When Karlach leads the charge, opening the door, she tries to look shocked.

"Oh dear! It's quite rude to storm into someone's house like that. Where are your manners?"

Without responding, Karlach throws her axe into the hag's shoulder, breaking the illusion, showing the monster for who she is. Covered in grime, like a witch born straight from the mud.

"It looks like I'll just have to teach you all how to be polite!"

Karlach tries to go for a second hit, but the hag teleports. Gale soon tracks her down, casting a ray of frost. Astarion follows her up the stairs while she tries to counterspell Gale. You and Lae'zel try to attack from a distance, missing because of just how quick she can move from place to place. Wyll has focused on assisting Gale, and Shadowheart is keeping track of all your party members, making sure to be there as soon as one of you takes a hit. In the meantime, she casts guidance on Astarion, who is fighting much more intensely than usual. Perhaps killing the Gur wasn't enough, and the anger was still boiling inside.

"Alright little mosquito, you want to be a thorn in my side? Poor decision."

The hag disappears from sight, and Astarion stops in his tracks. At first you think nothing of it. It almost looks like he's searching the room for where your enemy landed. For him though, the hag has cast a strong illusion, preying on his worst fear: being back in Cazador's grasp. The teahouse has transformed into the kennels, cold stone on bare feet, blood spattered across the walls.

Well, well, well. Seems as though the boy never learns! Perhaps, this time, will set you straight.

He hears the voice of Godey taunting him, threatening to pull him apart again.

"No! No, I left- I left, I was free!"

It's at this moment you realize he's not here, not in the mental sense.

"Focus on the hag, I'll try to snap him out of it."

You order the rest of the group, and they nod without a word, searching the teahouse for where she's gone now. You run up the stairs, finding a trembling pale man who has dropped his daggers.

Deep down, you like bein' leashed, don't ya?

The words bounce around in his head, a vision of Cazador appearing. You try to shake him, to mentally connect him back to his body, but it only plays into the illusion more, your actions becoming Cazador's.

"Astarion! Astarion it's just a spell, it's not real. It's not real my love, please."

Soon enough, your group finds the hag again, disrupting her concentration, releasing her grip on the elf. His breathing is terrifyingly fast, and he takes a moment to come out of the vision, grabbing a dagger from the floor and very quickly brandishing it towards you.

"DON'T."

You're trying desperately not to cry, because you know he doesn't need your shared sadness right now.

"Hey, it's okay. It's just me, Tav."

You lightly touch the hand holding the dagger, and he loosens his grip. Your hands move to take the blade from his grasp, setting his weapons to the side.

"I... I was there. I was back there."

"I know. Seems as though Ethel knows more than she should."

Astarion is still trying to root himself back in reality, you blood still racing in his dead veins.

"I can't go back Tav. Please, I can't go back."

"I know. I won't let you end up back there, ever."

He's still weary of physical touch, so you simply rub across his knuckles, trying to ground him in the moment. Your deepest urge is to wrap yourself around him and never let go, keep him in a protective case where no one can ever hurt him again, but that's not real. Being entirely safe isn't real. But damn, do you wish it was, for his sake.

As you're sitting there with him, the group makes their way back.

"We lost her. Have a feeling she went deeper into a cave somewhere."

You eye Karlach, and the two of you come to a silent understanding as you hold onto Astarion's shakey hands.

"We'll go set up camp where we entered the swamp. Take your time."

And with that, the tiefling takes the rest of your companions out of the teahouse, leaving the two of you alone.

"Why?"

You turn to look at him, cocking your head slightly.

"Why what?"

"Why would you say you won't let me end up there again? Cazador isn't some being you can simply keep me from, he's... different."

"I don't care."

"What do you mean you don't care?"

"I just, don't care. I don't care how powerful he is or whatever abilities he has, he can't have you. He just can't."

You finally do tear up now, not sure how else to explain it to the vampire.

"He most definitely cou-"

"No."

You try to blink the tears away, feeling the little callouses on his palm from over the decades.

"I want you to know what it's like to belong to someone in a pure way, not for personal gain, but just because they need you. And now that I have you... I just need you. I need you Astarion, so he can't have you. I'd die before he could take you from me."

He's silent for a moment. All forms of ownership he's known have been terrifying. Whatever could you mean by belonging to someone in a pure way? How can you belong to someone innocently? Your tadpole senses his concern, connecting without much effort at all.

"I don't need anything from you. I don't need you to do anything for me, I just need you Aster."

He smiles a little.

"Aster?"

"Yeah. Sorry, I had just been thinking about it. If you don't like it-"

"No I- I love it. Aster. Like the flower?"

"Yeah."

Somehow, the teahouse is peaceful in this moment. You feel young all over again, like you've never been in love before, like Astarion is the only being you've ever known. He interrupts your thoughts.

"Thank you, for saying all that. Maybe I wouldn't mind belonging to someone without expectations. It sounds, nice."

His voice cracks on the last word.

"Well, Aster, then you can belong to me as long as you'd like."

You swipe a piece of hair behind his ear, looking for a reason to get close to his face. As if the fates knew it to be true, you lock lips, despite the horrific smell outside and the creaking wood of the floorboards, you're somewhere else. Some place where the asters bloom in peace.

#baldur's gate 3 #astarion #baldurs gate astarion #astarion x reader #astarion x tav #angst #comfort #fluff #x reader

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eswel · 7 months

Text

The Gojo memorial: the whole story

You may already seen that here in Chile people created a shrine in the subway in order to honour Satoru Gojo. I'll try to recreate the entire chain of events as far as I could gather in social media for everyone's convenience, so you can read about the whole thing in just one post. Buckle up, because we're in for a ride, this story is really good. More under the cut.

Thursday (september 21)

There was an advertisement by Crunchyroll promoting the series at some subway stations. A few people decided to bring some flowers and messages as offering to the character.

(Source)

The thing started to quickly escalate and soon more people started to leave messages, flowers and candles.

I remember seeing a picture of someone from the staff of Metro cleaning the offerings with a broom. I tried to search for it now, but I can't find it anymore. It got buried by the flood of tweets.

*Edit* I found the picture. Someone shared it again.

Friday (september 22)

The next day the memorial became huge. You may think that people were being serious about the whole thing of setting a memorial , but most messages and drawings were humourous. A few of them:

"Steal the sky"

"Paradise won an angel"

"The sky is bluer because of your eyes"

"Fly high"

"The moon will be more beautiful with you up there"

"You'll be the brightest star"

"You broke my heart in two"

"Exorcise the sky"

"You gave everything, my king"

"Gojo lives"

There was even drawings making fun of what happened to him. People patched him up with band-aids and tape. Well, that's our kind of humour, we chileans can have a dark sense of humour.

(Source)

Even some people in cosplay showed up.

In the late hours of the day, the security guards started to dismantle the shrine, just like the previous day. Then they were assigned to custody the advertisement.

(Source)

Saturday (september 23)

The next morning Metro changed their minds and allowed the messages and drawings, but they said that candles were forbidden, because they're dangerous. Understandable.

The event had started to make it to the online versions of the news media, but also in the print version for it appeared on the front page of one of the major newspapers. They dedicated 3 pages surrounding the whole thing. One for the memorial itself, one for the cultural importance of the religious practice known as "animitas" and one for the social impact of anime.

(Source)

The shrine continued to grow and people started to leave other offerings like sunglasses and even gummies and chocolates. You see, in our culture when people set up animitas usually they leave things that the person liked. I've never seen this anime and I don't know the character. Does he likes candy? You guys tell me.

(Source)

Sunday (september 24)

By the time I'm writing this post is sunday. I heard the rumour that Crunchyroll called Metro to retire the advertisement, but I cannot confirm if this is true or not. Also, I have the feeling that the whole situation can even appear on TV, considering that we have 2 TV channels dedicated solely to anime, but that would be on monday. We'll see. If I see any new development in the saga of the Gojo memorial I'll update this post.

UPDATE:

Part 2

Part 3

#jujutsu kaisen #gojo satoru #personal random ideas

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abyssruler · 2 years

Text

breaking up, breaking down

pairing/s: albedo, childe, diluc, kazuha, scaramouche, xiao, venti, zhongli x gn!reader

summary: if there’s anything you can expect to be consistent in life, it’s that everything has an end. or — genshin men and how they are after you break up with them.

note: angsty in everyone’s part, but it got too lighthearted in childe’s bc i simply cannot take that ginger seriously (affectionate)

ALBEDO

There aren’t any notable changes to his routine. He’d still go about his day, working on his experiments and scribbling down notes, occasionally taking a break to sketch a pretty flower he saw or the wing pattern of a passing butterfly.

And then he finds himself drawing the outline of an eye, then a nose, then lips. Until he suddenly stops in the middle of drawing a strand of your hair blowing in the wind, your face frozen in a smile staring back at him through the canvas of his sketchbook.

It hits him then, the realization, the heart-wrenching clarity of what happened that leaves him sitting in his chair, staring at your face in paper and wondering where he went wrong.

He tries to distract himself by continuing his research, but his mind has a hard time focusing on what needs to be done. It’s agonizing, he doesn’t think he’s felt this way before, never even thought he’d ever feel such pain. In a way, he’s glad his master isn’t here to make a study of what emotional pain means to an artificial human like him.

He sees you two weeks after you broke up with him, laughing as you tried to haggle with a merchant for their wares, unaware of the charm you exude that draws people in like moths to a flame. But then your gaze moves, searching through the crowd—and Albedo should really leave now, avoid barging into your life because there simply isn’t a place for him there anymore—but he does none of that.

Your eyes meet. He doesn’t think he was imagining it when he saw yours dim for the briefest moment. (His heart hurts. Why are you looking at him like that?)

You make your way through the busy street to reach him. He tells himself he should leave, but for the first time in his life, he does what contradicts his logic and stays.

“You look good,” you tell him, something melancholic in the tone of your voice. Oh, if only you knew.

“You as well.” He wants to say more, wants to say how radiant you looked under the sun, the light hitting you in just the right way that has him itching to grab a pencil and immortalize the image in paper—but he holds his tongue. “I need to go.”

Your face falls. He wishes he wasn’t the cause of it. “Ah, right. You must be busy, as usual.” There isn’t a hint of bitterness to your voice, just resignation.

He leaves after bidding you goodbye, feeling the heat of your gaze at his back as he walked away.

CHILDE

He wants you and he will do everything in his power to have you back.

In the early days after you broke up, you won’t hear a word from him. Not a peep. You only hear passing news that dead monsters and hilichurl camps near the vicinity of your home have been utterly eradicated. Passing travelers claim how the areas were ‘strangely flooded’ even though it hasn’t rained in weeks.

Then come the gifts. From flowers to clothes to accessories to different delicacies that are all worth more than your entire life’s paycheck. And when that doesn’t work, Childe sets to work on his recruits.

You suddenly find yourself constantly being approached by a startling amount of Fatui recruits ranging from normal lackies to gunners to cicin mages, and even that one memorable time when a mirror maiden approached you in the middle of buying groceries and proceeded to buy everything in the store, saying all of it was for you.

The Fatui recruits had one thing in common: they all had nothing but praises to say for the Eleventh Fatui Harbinger.

“Master Childe defeated all the recruits in under ten seconds!” “Have you heard how Lord Harbinger killed twenty geovishaps and came out without a single scratch?” “I saw him buying that exact same shirt yesterday, it cost one million mora! He’s so rich!” “Lord Tartaglia has been so down lately. He keeps saying how much he misses his beloved.”

“Did you know? Even Lady Signora wept after she heard that you and Master Childe broke up.” That one, you’re certain never actually happened, and you made sure to tell that with an unimpressed look to the pyro agent who told you. As if Signora would ever cry, she’d probably throw a party for you for finally leaving Childe.

In the end, after cycling through so many recruits, he had no choice but to come to you directly.

…Which is how you woke up at six in the morning to the ground shaking and the sound of an eerily familiar laugh right outside your house.

You open your window to find Childe fighting a lawachurl right in front of your house, a ring of Fatuus surrounding and cheering him on. His smile brightens to an almost comical degree once he sees you and your bedhead squinting out from a window.

“You look so stunning today, beloved!” He steps back from an earth-shattering punch by the lawachurl. “I’ve brought you the biggest lawachurl I could find so I can show you how worthy I am of you!”

He then proceeds to—and you have to blink a few times to see if you’re not hallucinating—fist fight the lawachurl. And he’s actually winning. No vision, no weapon. Just his bare fists.

When the commotion wakes up your entire neighborhood, you have to go down there and yell at him to stop or take this fight somewhere that isn’t right in front of your house! He complies with a grin and a promise saying he’ll meet you later.

There’s something fond curling in your chest that you try and fail to smother. With an exasperated tone, you tell him that yes, you’ll find time in your busy schedule to meet him. He lights up like you just agreed to marry him and yells out rapid orders in Snezhnayan to his recruits.

“I’ll see you later!” He blows a kiss in your direction that you ignore. You turn away and walk back into your house, trying (and failing) to fight the growing smile on your face.

DILUC

It’s not evident to anyone who doesn’t know him well, but Diluc takes it close to heart and buries it among countless other regrets that have accumulated in his life. The turbulent feelings that threaten to overcome his mind at any hour of the day manifests itself in him becoming more withdrawn.

He’s gloomy, more brooding than usual, and the reason becomes apparent once the other patrons notice the lack of a certain person who usually sits by the bar during his shifts. Your usual laugh accompanied by teasing grins and playful swats at his long hair when you think no one is looking are nowhere to be seen.

One particularly drunk person had come up to him as he was wiping down the counters and asked why you weren’t there. Anyone who had been there to see the sight would tell you that he didn’t say anything, hadn’t been able to say anything. He just… stood there, hands frozen mid-motion and eyes drawn somewhere, lost in thought.

He slips up sometimes. Asks the maids to prepare a dinner for two only to stop in the middle of talking as he realizes what he just said. At breakfast, he pauses in the middle of reading his daily papers to turn his head to the right, a question on the tip of his tongue that dies when he sees the empty spot you usually occupied. It’s the pitying gazes that follow when he slips up that he hates the most.

He makes your favorite drink sometimes, on the days when he’s on shift and feeling particularly self-destructive. It stays hidden under the bar counter, hoping against hope that you’ll walk through the door and greet him with an upbeat ‘good evening!’ that makes his day all the more better. You never do.

It’s on a bright, sunny morning when he’s out overseeing the delivery of wine to the tavern that he sees you again. His heart soars for all but a second before it comes crashing down, because Diluc Ragnvindr does not deserve nice things.

You’re holding the hand of some nondescript man, grinning and laughing and emitting such a great sense of contentment that he can almost feel it from where he’s standing meters away from you.

You’re happy. It’s been months and he’s still wallowing in old hurts. You’re happy.

Did you ever smile like that when you were with him? He likes to think so, but the realistic, pessimistic thought is that you’re probably better off not being with him. You’re happy. Happier now than you were when you were with him.

Everything he’s ever loved has been hurt directly and indirectly by his hands. He turns away from the sight of you and pretends to be preoccupied with his task. Maybe it’s for the best that you left before it could happen.

KAZUHA

He tries not to take it to heart. He understands why you left, knows it before you even made the decision to leave. And in the aftermath, much like a leaf adrift in the wind, he roams about aimlessly, lost in thought.

Grief is not an emotion he’s unfamiliar with. As he sits by the cliffs overlooking the endless ocean, grief burrows its way to his chest like an old, unwelcome friend. He doesn’t fight it. He’s learned the hard way that fighting it is a losing battle, like picking at a scab, hoping that doing so will make it heal faster, yet only succeeding in worsening the wound.

Kazuha isn’t a stranger to loneliness, of letting the wind kiss his tears away as they dried on his cheeks. He is, however, unfamiliar with this new kind of ache in his chest. And only after much rumination does he conclude what it might be.

The loss of his family, the loss of his heritage, the loss of his friend, and now, the loss of his lover. A master of loss, he could almost call himself. His old friend would certainly find such a title amusing.

He finds himself writing letters to you, even with the knowledge that he’ll never be able to send them to you. It’s the thought that comforts him, the pretense that he still has someone to tell of his travels, someone to simply come home to, even when he knows he isn’t welcome anymore.

In his weakest moment, when he had too much to drink and too little self-restraint, he sends one of the letters to you. He’s forgotten whether it’s the one where he laments the loss of your presence, the one where he begs you to have him back, or the one where only three words are written, a small blot in the ink where a stray tear had fallen.

He waits, and waits, and waits a little more, staying for a whole month in the small village he’d addressed the letter from for the small, improbable event that you may have written back. He learns later on that the letter never made it to your hands. The ship it had been on had lost all its cargo to the sea, including his letter. When he heard the news, he hadn’t known whether to be relieved or lament on what could have been.

It isn’t unpleasant to see you again. Kazuha has had time to let go of his hurt, but still, the image of your nostalgia-inducing eyes leave in him a sense of loss he thought he had already settled. Your mirage smiles, “Kazuha.” Had he been a weaker man, he would have folded and swept you up in his arms.

Nobody asks why his eyes have a slight sheen to it after he forces himself to walk away from you. He stands atop the beach and lets the waves wash over his bare feet, closing his eyes and imagining what could have been had he let himself succumb to the desire of holding you one last time, even if you were merely a mirage from the past.

Truly, the golden apple archipelago is a place where dreams are made into reality.

SCARAMOUCHE

He tries to act above it all, feigning indifference as if the entire thing is just a mild inconvenience to him.

Oh, you’re leaving him? That’s fine, he doesn’t care. Do you know how many people would kill to share his bed? You were tolerable, a way to pass time. Don’t think you were anything special. You, a normal person? Don’t make him laugh. You were nothing more than a pet he kept because you entertained him. It’s good that you’re leaving, actually. It saves him the trouble of having to get rid of you.

He’s… not very kind about it all. Defensive and on guard, hackles raising with every word that comes out of his mouth. He hates every second of it, but he can’t stop because stopping is to admit defeat, it means having to acknowledge that you meant something to him after hundreds of years of loneliness. He let you in his carefully guarded walls, and now—now you’re leaving him? Abandoning him after he bared himself open to you?

You are just like her.

Scaramouche stops before he can say those last words. The red that had been threatening to overcome his vision slowly recedes, leaving a numbing sort of clarity that washes over him like the rising tides of Inazuma’s beaches. His mouth feels dry, throat closing up.

There are tears streaming down your face.

He wishes you’d do something. Hit him, yell at him, curse his name. Anything. Just… anything but this silence that hangs heavy in the air, cloying in it’s thickness and threatening to drown him with words that can never be taken back.

He doesn’t apologize, won’t ever apologize. He is a god, and not even you would make him say those damnable words. He sees the way your eyes dim in understanding as you realize the same thing, and that, perhaps, is why you turn your back to him and walk away.

He wishes he could say that he called out for you, that he grabbed your arm and made you stay, that he just… held you. Instead, he watches you leave him, face blank and a phantom ache resonating in his hollow chest. The silence after you leave feels like the night before his creator abandoned him.

He tells himself it’s fine, that you’ll come back. You always do. This is just one of many arguments that always get resolved after a day or so—except. Except, he doesn’t let himself think of any other possibility. You’ll come back. (You have to.)

The months following your absence is a blur, spikes of irritation mixed with hateful words and barbed insults directed towards anyone who so much as breathed the wrong way. His subordinates are half-contemplating desertion just to escape his wrath. They all wonder where you’ve gone. You’re usually the one who soothes the Balladeer when he’s in one of his moods, like the godsend that you are. Though none of them are brave enough to mention your name after what he did to the foolish recruit who asked of your whereabouts.

Years pass. You never did come back.

He still gets the occasional reports about you and your general wellbeing, still sends out his best soldiers to clear out any monsters who’ve settled near your home. You never find anyone else after him. It brings a strange sense of relief in him when his monthly reports on you end up without a hint of a new lover.

He tries to forget you, but even with a new heart and the ascendance to godhood, there is still a lingering sense of loss and past regrets.

XIAO

He lets you go without argument. He’s used to people leaving him, but this is… different.

The thought of you there, physically within reach yet unable to to cross the distance that separates you from him. It’s a different kind of agony from the ones that have afflicted him for millennia.

He sometimes finds himself standing by the balcony of Wangshu Inn, eyes roaming over the vast landscape of Dihua Marsh, looking for the slightest hint of your silhouette. The sound of footsteps coming up the stairs always attracts his attention, anticipating your signature greeting and the smell of whatever mortal sustenance you’ve deigned to make for him to, as you once put it, let him experience the delicacies that this world has to offer.

You can’t call yourself ‘having lived a long life’ if you haven’t tried all the tasty food, Xiao!

…He misses you, though he will never admit it, perhaps not even to Rex Lapis himself.

His time—which once consisted of you, killing monsters, you again, roaming the lands for the remains of old gods, tasting whatever you cooked for him, and accompanying you so you can get home safely—is now comprised of nothing but endless slaughter. He tells himself it’s not a distraction, but it’s a thinly veiled excuse, weak even to his own ears. How low he has fallen to create such feeble excuses to justify the hurt that spreads from his chest to the tips of his fingers.

He used to pick up small things and trinkets in his time scouring the land for evil. A shiny pebble that reminded him of your eyes, a particularly large sweetflower that you would gape comically at once he showed you, qingxin flowers he plucked from the highest mountains just so he can see the way your face lights up in a smile. He still does all these things, only now, the objects are stored in a realm made in the likeness of your home, placing each one in a shelf or table that he thinks you would have arranged them in.

One time, he panics when he sees the flowers start to wilt, and in the heat of the moment, he placed adeptal power in them to ensure they will never die. To this day, he isn’t sure why he did so, only that he imagined at the time how upset you would be that they died in his care, even though he knows how unlikely it is that you will ever discover his hobby of collecting flowers and storing them in his realm.

Perhaps he hopes you’ll come back to him, so that when you do, he can see the way your eyes brighten up once he shows you everything he got for you while you were away.

It’s unlikely, he knows, but it’s nice to dream of it. He thinks his siblings would be proud to see him finally have a little hope for something.

VENTI

He spends the rest of the week in the tavern drinking as much as he can. For once, Diluc doesn’t try to reproach him for drinking what he can’t pay for.

He doesn’t exactly get drunk—can’t get drunk, more like. To a god like him, drinking a hundred barrels of Mondstadt’s finest wines won’t even be enough to get him tipsy. He is the god of freedom (and wine, he’d like to add), he can outdrink every single one of the archons and still have enough semblance to go to war. And yet…

You appear on the seventh day like a salvation, face contorted in worry when you see him slumped on the counter and one inch away from falling off the stool. It isn’t difficult to act the part of a drunken bard, pretending to sway on his feet and donning a fake intoxicated grin as he asked Charles for another glass.

The wind tells him of your arrival, but he ignores it just as he ignores the way his heart soars when the wind brings him the barest hint of your scent. He wishes you didn’t come here. He wishes he didn’t act so drunkenly. He wishes you were more heartless and ignored whoever must have tattled on him drinking Angel’s Share into bankruptcy.

You call his name. He pretends he’s asleep just so he doesn’t have to face his problems. Ha. How ironic. Will he wake up to Mondstadt destroyed by the remains of Khaenri’ah this time? He nearly did once.

He hears you sigh before he feels you bring his arm across your shoulders. You help him get off the stool, an arm around his waist to help keep him steady. The weight of Diluc’s disapproving gaze for deceiving you about his drunkenness is heavy, but he tells himself it’s alright. He just… wants to be selfish for once. If he has to act drunk to feel your arms around him again, he’ll suffer this humiliation as many times as he can.

“Venti,” you start as you walk him in the direction of your home. “I was worried, you know. Aether told me how much you’d been drinking since…” You trail off. He feels you shaking your head before continuing, “Just… don’t be so reckless with your health.” You laugh, mildly sardonic that’s directed more towards yourself than him. “Ah, what am I saying… you won’t even have any recollection of this tomorrow anyway.”

He wants to say something, but saying something means breaking this moment between you, it means revealing that he doesn’t actually need your help because once he starts speaking, the dam will break and everything will come spilling out. I’m sorry, I miss you, I love you.

The front door to your house opens. He’s gently placed down your couch, a blanket thrown over him as you thoughtfully take his shoes off for him. He feels you linger by his side, can practically hear the conflict in you.

He’s unprepared for the feeling of your warm breath on his skin, your lips hovering over his face before placing a chaste kiss on his forehead. “Goodnight, Venti.”

He leaves before the sun rises.

ZHONGLI

He only smiles, small and understanding with a hint of sorrow at the corner of his eyes.

He tells you he’ll respect your decision, but should you change your mind, he will always be here. You say it’s doubtful, he would’ve probably found someone else by then. Zhongli doesn’t correct you, only leans in and places his lips on the top of your head, as gentle as he’s always been with you, somehow managing to convey with a single gesture how high he holds you in regard.

And for the barest, infinitesimal moment, you half-contemplate the idea of staying. It’s a wishful thought. You end up leaving before you can change your mind.

He’s still as grounded as ever, but there’s a fragility to it, a certain brittleness that threatens to crumble from within him. He is the Lord of Geo, and yet he is so easily undone by you. The pain is temporary, he knows from past losses, but it doesn’t lessen the ache that resonates in his chest.

For the first time in his long life, he curses his golden memory that makes him incapable of forgetting, though that which he curses is also something he is grateful for. He can’t bear having to suffer losing the memories of your time together.

Your relationship is amiable, like that of old, awkward friends you had fallen out of touch with rather than that of old lovers. It’s what you wanted after all, this sense of normalcy. He has become such a vital part of your daily life that you simply couldn’t cut him off of your life entirely.

He doesn’t know which is worse; having to act as a mere friend when he wants nothing more than to wrap you in his arms and never let go, or to have no contact with you at all.

Morax is not one to ask for things, not one to plead his case to anyone. He was a selfish and proud god, a necessity that was shaped from him by the war. To love a mortal enough to leave his throne and fake his death would have been unthinkable. But that is why he is no longer Morax. He is Zhongli.

And Zhongli? He wants you. Desperately. Enough that he is willing to beg should you ask it of him.

His deceased enemies would laugh in mockery at what has become of the fearsome Morax. How low he has fallen—but it is a burden he is willing to bear. He will suffer as many humiliations as it takes to have you back.

The only issue is that you don’t want him anymore. But he is a man who finds gold where others would see stone. If he has to build his way up from friendship all over again, then it is a task he will do so gladly. As many times as it takes for you to want him back.

#genshin x reader #genshin impact x reader #albedo x reader #albedo kreideprinz x reader #childe x reader #tartaglia x reader #ajax x reader #diluc x reader #diluc ragnvindr x reader #kazuha x reader #kaedehara kazuha x reader #scaramouche x reader #kunikuzushi x reader #xiao x reader #venti x reader #zhongli x reader #gn reader

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kryptznnn · 10 months

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♛- PLAY-HARD I

1st part/ 2nd part (Mature Audience Community Label)

Series Masterlist ⋆⁺₊⋆ ☀︎ ⋆⁺₊⋆

➳ INTERESTS; - olo’eyktan!jake x fem!omatikayan reader

➳ BACKGROUND; - working alongside Mo’at has helped you and your family in various ways, as a way to repay her for your free working she pairs you along side Toruk Makto to aid him in small departments he needs assistance in, but more importantly to find a Tsahik suitable for the Olo’eyktan, but he isn’t always cooperative.

➳ WARNINGS; - 3.1k wc slight age gap (25 and 21), takes place after the great war, eventual smut, slow burn, sexual tension, use of alcohol, vomiting (mentioned once), wet kisses, hickies, jealousy, power imbalance, pet names, fluff, bit of angst if you squint, nipple!play, slight p!play.

➳a.i; first fic i’m very very nervous, but i hope u all enjoy ^^, i take requests so just hit my inbox 🌸

*na’vi translation will be provided*

Mo’at was not joking when she spoke of Jake Sully and his stubbornness, the reason why she decided you’d be a perfect aid is due to your patience, which was running very thin at the moment.

“I’m here to assist you, but i cannot do my job if you refuse to go against my requests.” you stated sharply, his ears pinned against his hair and his lips tightened into a straight line, he simply crossed his arms. This was the 3rd date you’d set up for him that he’s rejected.

Not the first, or the second, but the third time. To make matters worse whenever you’d complain to Mo’at she’d simply tell you to just push a little farther.

“I told you I didn’t like her” he said sternly, repeating the same statement he has for the past 2 weeks. “skxawng, [moron] you’ve said the same thing for the other 2 na’vi i’ve tried to pair you with, do not be selfish, think of the future of our people-“

“That’s all I think about y/n, I might be many things but selfish isn’t one of’em. You can’t just force someone with me, if im going to be with some girl for the rest of my life at least let me make my own decision.” He quickly cut you off, now unfolding his arms and placing a hand at his side, eyeing you up and down. You’d be lying if you said he didn’t make any good points, if you were in his place you’d be more than frustrated, but regardless you’re job here was to help and provide for the olo’eyktan, which is exactly what you were going to do.

“Mr. Sully, please-“

“Jake. It’s jake kid” He buds in, smiling softly.

“Jake, I understand what you’re saying and how you feel, but part of my job is providing, and what i’m doing is providing for you and your future” You correct yourself, giving him a pleading look, searching in his eyes for a look of understanding, which you soon found. He relaxed a bit and wasn’t as tense as before, nodding in approval. You quickly smiled, thankful this situation didn’t have to escalate to a serious argument like it has before hand. Those times were the worst times for the both of you, and thankfully you’ve both been able to talk them out and set boundaries and learn from past mistakes, if anything Mo’at would repeat how times like those strengthens the relationship you two share, and she wasn’t wrong.

“m’sorry” He said quietly, but loud enough for you to hear, rubbing his hands together and sitting down, his tail curling up beside him with his head down. “syeha si tam [breathe, it’s okay], you have nothing to apologize for, i’m sorry too, the position you’re in isn’t easy, trust me I know” you said calmly, slowly walking over to him, just for him to open up his arms. You slowly walked over to him, quickly embracing him just for him to do the same with you. You sighed and smiled softly, your head resting on his.

Come to think of it Jake was always a physical kind of person, “touchy” is what the term is. Whenever things would go wrong with him or the clan he would drain out quickly, before he didn’t have anyone to rely on, not a friend close enough for him to talk to so he would create a relationship with Mo’at, asking her for advice and methods to aid him, right before he came across you. You would be seated with Mo’at, mixing herbs for her while listening to their conversations, on specific days jake would speak about certain na’vi women attempting to court him, which made you giggle when you first heard it

“Who is she?” Jake asked quickly glancing over at you, as you quickly covered your mouth to stop any other laughter. Mo’at turned to you and back at Jake softly smiling. “Her name is y/n, I love her like a daughter of mine,she’s been under my arm for the past 12 years” She said proudly, Jake nodded his head, not taking his eyes off of you, watching as you walked over and stood beside Mo’at.

“Ohe ahasey sa’nok” [I’ve finished mother] You said, placing the bowl in Mo’at’s hands, smiling at her, she thanked you and introduced you to Jake. “Te suli, this is y/n, y/n this is tsyeyk suli, our olo’ektyan” She stated, directing her hand to you than back to jake. You quickly signed the “I see you” gesture saying “Oel ngati kameie” as he nodded and repeated the same action. You looked him in his eyes, just to realize he was looking at you this whole time, you quickly looked to the side and began to distract yourself.

He had such an intense gaze, does he look at everyone like that? You asked yourself, your tail thrashing back and forth recalling the scene that happened just seconds ago.

“If you need extra assistance I can always have y/n accompany you, she’s always wanted to to explore other fields of work, I think she could help you a lot” Mo’at spoke soothingly, placing the bowl you gave her down and adding bandages to it. Jake continued to watch you, listening to Mo’at’s words carefully, still grinning ear to ear.

“I’d love that” He said, slowly standing up to take his leave.

That was 4 months ago, since then Jake has been very open with you, always in need of a hug and consolidation, which you were happy to give. Although it was painful how often you’d have to remind yourself not to mix pleasure and business, you’re helping you’re olo’ektyan, he’s just worn out and exhausted. Surely tonight would help him, deeming the celebration would be in his favor, celebrating his successful raid with his party and no injuries or casualties were gained.

“I’ll see you tonight?” He asked,slowly releasing you from his grasp and looking up at you, you just looked down at him smiling and nodding softly. “Of course, just don’t expect me to be there early, i’ll be coming with Za’yukto” You said, slowly backing up ready to leave, jake quickly grabbed your hand as soon as you turned around.

“Who is that?” He asked, you turned to face him to see his demeanor quickly changed. His jaw had clenched and his grip on your hand was getting tighter by the second. “Just a friend of mine, he didn’t want to go alone so I volunteered to take him, just for a while” You said harmlessly, he tilted his head, looking at you up and down before responding. He opened his mouth just to slowly close is and take a deep breath, making direct eye contact with you. “Just… just don’t be too late okay? I’ll be waiting for you” He said softly, his ears lowering slightly as he let go of your hand.

“Of course, and if you ever get too bored you can talk to all of your other friends there” You joked, quickly getting your belongings and leaving shortly.

✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿

You glanced in your small reflection for a final time before leaving your small hut. You haven’t done much to your appearance other than brushing out your braids and changing your purple beaded top to a red one, you’ve always liked how the colors looked on you.

This’ll do. You thought, it was too late to turn back and change now, you’ve already gone so far anyway. You looked pleasant, eye-catching, which was the exact look you were hoping for, hopefully you’d get someone to look at you during tonight’s celebration, or maybe a specific someone. Of course that specific someone being non other than J-

“Y/N!! Are you here?” You stopped dead in your tracks quickly walking over to the entrance of your hut.

That’s Za’yukto’s voice. “Hi, sorry, ohe am lonu to sìltsan” [I’m ready to go] You stated, stepping outside and quickly setting down the entrance of your hut with a smile, looking up at him. He smiled in response and complimented you, to which you thanked him and began making your way to the spirit tree for the celebration.

Soon after you two arrived, you quickly began to adjust your top, brush off your loincloth and hair, saying your goodbyes to Za’yu as you made your way to look for Jake, thankfully finding him quickly-

He’s with someone, you thought, seeing him off to the side laughing with a large drink in his hand, obviously being alcohol, of course stronger than any human substances and yet tasting even sweeter than anything you’ve ever had before. Seeing him happy like that did nothing more than make you smile a bit, he’s been stressed lately, he needs some sort of release. You quickly walk to the side getting closer to him just to see he’s doing more than just talking.

More than just laughing, and not with any someone, with a woman.

And he’s…. he’s kissing her? They’re kissing, they’re definitely kissing, and he’s not kissing just any woman, it’s the first na’vi you ever brought towards him to consider that he immediately rejected, simply telling you “There’s nothing special about her”.

Ewya.

You didn’t even bother making your way over to him, you’d already seen enough, feeling your face heat up out of sheer embarrassment and your eyes beginning to burn. On one swift motion you turn around to find Za’yu and to your surprise he already had a large cup waiting for you. You quickly grabbed it and chugged it down, your face immediately going from a sour look to more relaxed.

“Syeha si y/n!!” [Breathe y/n!!] Za’yu said, quickly taking the now empty cup from your hands as you just smiled at him. “I’m fine, come dance with me?” you asked, holding his hand. He just shook his head and placed the cups down on a table beside him, quickly taking you to the center of the dancefloor and began dancing with you in his arms.

This is a party, a place to let loose and celebrate, and that’s exactly what you planned on doing. You hooked your arms around Za’yu’s shoulders, pulling him a little closer, and looking at him intensely. You’d be lying if you said Za’yu wasn’t attractive, he was insanely attractive and overall perfect, everything a woman would look for in a man, he was skilled, intelligent, good looking, and strong? A complete package. Especially with the fact he’s such a gentleman, that’s what triggered your friendship so quickly.

He looked down at you, his hands traveling from your back to your waist, grinning at you. You slowly pushed yourself up against his body, feeling your beaded top clink against his broad chest. You slowly climb up on your tippy toes closer and closer to his face, as he too moves in closer, just for you to reach towards his ear and kiss it.

“Can you get me another drink please? I’m so thirsty” You ask him playfully, rubbing your 4 fingers against your throat slowly, licking your lips at him. He nodded and reached down to your collarbone, kissing it softly before leaving to get you a drink.

Soon after dancing by yourself you feel a hand rest on your stomach and trail down to your pelvis, holding you securely as your back rests on his back, you lift your head up quickly to see Za’yu, with your drink in his hand as he smiled down at you. You slowly got onto your tippy toes and kissed him, just to taste residue of alcohol that he previously consumed, smiling at the sweet taste, and taking the cup from his hands and quickly finishing it, dropping the cup and turning to face him, kissing him again.

Honestly at this state you’re wondering where jake was, if he was enjoying himself with his dick probably down that girls throat, but at the same time you were too fucked out and having way too much fun to care. Your shared kisses with Za’yu quickly became more intimate and more active, exchanging saliva and practically moaning into his mouth while still dancing, now slowly beginning to grind yourself onto him.

“Za’yu-“ You moaned softly against his lips, barely being able to catch your breath. “I know tìyawn, I know, mawepey” [I know love, I know, be patient] He said softly, his kisses trailing from your lips to your jawline and down to your neck, beginning to suck on you softly.

You rested your hand on the back of his neck, slowly playing with his hair and mewling softly, your ears perked up and your tail curling around your leg. He continued however, lowering down to your collarbone, kissing it softly before continuing his assault.

“ ‘Yu, can w- can we go back to my place? Please” You whimper softly, as he slowly moves his head up to look at you, kissing you softly. “Whatever you want y/n”. He said, quickly going to hold your hand, just as you turn around someone crashes into you spilling their drink all over you.

Of course it was none other than Ninat, whos throat Jake was previously shoving his tongue down. “Shouldn’t you be all on the olo’ektyan?” You muttered quietly, thankful no one heard you. Before listening to her pleads and apologies you simply just shoved past her, clinging onto Za’yukto tightly. “Don’t worry we’ll get you cleaned up, come on” He said.

Soon enough you both arrived to your hut , walking straight into the back of your hut and dragging him along, to which he quickly obliged. You stepped into the small pond behind your hut and began removing your strained top and loincloth, ushering him to do the same, which he quickly did.

“I’m going to clean you up first” He said, smiling down at you and grabbing a nearby rag to wipe any access alcohol off of you. He was gentle and caring, he only looked above your collarbone and refused to look lower, to make sure ‘you felt comfortable’ was his excuse, you found his caring and respectful nature cute though, knowing there were a lot of navi men out there who would not do the same. You just helped guide his hand to where he had to clean off until he kissed you again, letting his hands trail up from your waist to your soft breasts.

“Is this okay?” He asked softly, looking in your eyes for complete confirmation, to which you nodded and smiled in response. He let his fingers graze against your nipples a few times before toying with you, lowering his head before taking your left breast into his mouth, rolling his tongue onto your nipple, making you moan softly, quickly gripping onto the back of his hair softly. “That’s not the only place that needs attention, i’m still dirty elsewhere” You teased, he looked up at you repositioning himself, giving you a cocky look before answering.

“Oh yeah? Where would that be?” He asked, you quickly took his hand to show him, hovering over your stomach, but before you could continue a wave of sickness hit you, making you pause. Za’yu quickly took notice of this and how your expression changed. “Hey, what’s wrong what happened” He asked, now completely serious as you now grabbed onto his shoulder for support. “I feel a little sick” You managed to make out weakly, he quickly finished cleaning you off and immediately got you out of the small pond, drying you up and taking you inside to get you into something, but not before you threw up on the side of the mossy ground twice before crying.

“It hurts” You said, your voice hoarse and dry, which reminded Za’yukto to get you some water, he instructed for you to stay in your room and get dressed as he fetched you something to drink along with a small herb to help with the burning of your throat.

You quickly got changed, sitting patiently for Za’yu, and he soon came telling you to swallow one of your own handmade herbal medicine and a glass of water behind it, which you did. “You need to get some rest, you’ve had a long night” He said, placing his hand onto your shoulder, rubbing it softly and smiling at you. You didn’t respond, only placing the glass down and sprawling yourself against your bed, your back now facing Za’yu.

A moment of silence has passed, he hasn’t left and you haven’t fallen asleep yet, why is he still-

“I’ll stop by tomorrow to check up on you” He quickly stated, interrupting your thoughts, you don’t answer and he takes the silence as a sign you must be asleep, big mistake.

“Hopefully tonight didn’t change anything within our friendship, i’m not looking for a mate or to court anyone now, it was never my intention to move so quickly with you” He mumbled, but loud enough for you to hear, and shift in the bed as a response, you waited to hear the flap of your hut close before letting the tears in your eyes roll out over your nose and stain your bed.

This was going to be such a long night, and tomorrow morning even longer.

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mokulule · 7 months

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The Number You have Called Cannot Be Reached - part 8

Part 1 | Masterlist

Ship: Dead on Main (Danny/Jason) Warnings: angst/depression and canon typical violence So I promised this like months ago, and then got overwhelmed by having to manage the taglist resulting in me not updating this fic despite actually having written the next part. So that said this is the last time I'm tagging people, please subscribe to the masterlist - I'm gonna link it both here at the top and at the bottom. Anyways enjoy the next part:

Jason could handle this. He had handled this for years. The Pits were a known enemy. It shouldn’t effect him to this degree. But he could handle this. He could go about his day without putting heads in duffel bags, that had got to count as a win. The fact that he was avoiding his family, was just a precaution. Jason had everything under control.

Not like when he’d fled the Cave after assaulting Bruce in his stupid sweater.

That had not been his proudest moment. But the thing that really got to him was how he didn’t remember doing it. He didn’t even remember going to the Cave. When he tried to think it was all a green haze. The last moment of real clarity was opening Ghost’s bag and seeing nothing but dry protein bars. Knowing in his gut this was all he ate and that he stood with his food, and no way to give it back to him.

When he had fled the Cave, he’d gone home shaking like a leaf, and sunk to the floor trying to get his head back on straight. He didn’t know how long he sat there with his back against the door, just trying to breathe and search his memory. Eventually, though he didn’t know after how long, he found his phone and looked up the news. It had been a great relief to find that Red Hood had not been sighted, so he likely hadn’t been out on a murder spree he couldn’t remember.

But now it was days later. There had been no more green hazes. Things were under control.

Maybe he hit a bit harder, and a bit longer, when he went out. But it was the normal amount? Wasn’t it? Definitely not much more than normal, if it was more. That he was sure of… like 80% sure of. Jason rubbed the front of his helmet in lieu of his brow - It didn’t really help. What had Bruce even said that set him off? He barely remembered, something that felt demeaning, but the words escaped him no matter how many times he turned them over in his head. Normally he wouldn’t question himself that like, of course Bruce would have said something demeaning, he always did. He didn’t trust Jason, never would again. There would always be suspicion and doubt. But now…

Jason’s hand clenched into fists. Now having been without the Pits’ influence, having seen Bruce trying to reach out to him, as awkward and resigned as it had been, he wasn’t so sure.

He wasn’t sure he could trust himself.

Maybe this was all Bruce’s plan? Another of his famous gambits - this one to fold Jason back under his control, with the pretense of love and family. Because surely he had been right all along and Jason needed to be watched, couldn’t be trusted on his own.

Jason ripped the helmet off his head, only barely stopped himself from throwing it. He gasped and breathed in deep, like a man drowning. He was the one in control, he reminded himself firmly. Not the pits. Not Bruce.

There was sound in his comms and he hastily pulled the helmet back on. Ghost had been sighted. He had to go. If he could just talk with Ghost, figure out what this was.

Ghost ran away. Immediately, as if he could sense Jason.

It was okay, Jason could handle this.

Oo o oO

Barbara tapped the space bar absently without actually pressing it. Keeping half an eye on her leftmost monitor which showed the program she used for the surveillance in Gotham, no persons of interest were pinging tonight so far, no alarms had tripped for about an hour. She had time to ponder the conundrum that was their reoccurring thief.

If the thief was building something the other night was proof the loss of the spectral calibrator, hadn’t put a stop to the progress. The thief never ran in the same direction so they still didn’t even have that to go by to narrow down where he stayed, when he wasn’t giving them the run around.

The odd reaction to Jason hadn’t made a reappearance. In fact the moment Jason joined them the thief disappeared immediately: density shifting into the ground. Jason was not happy about it to say the least.After the backpack full of barely edible off-brand protein bars had been delivered to the cave by Jason, Barbara would agree with Jason that whatever situation the thief was in, it was worrying if this was all that he ate. She still held by her assessment that the photographic evidence was of too low quality early in their run-ins because of the strange electromagnetic interference he gave off to actually judge if he’d lost weight - but he did look very gaunt now.

She leaned back in her chair. A cup of coffee was warm between her hands, she breathed in the familiar scent as she considered the known facts.

Name assumed to be Danny Fenton, potentially legally Daniel Fenton, though they’d been unable to find a match to his physical appearance and rough age in their databases. He hadn’t actually spoken to any of them, it was a very real possibility he was a foreigner, but they’d checked and he wasn’t wanted by any foreign intelligence services.

The phone was baffling.

It was a brick, and it looked like something from the early 00s, from around the time when handheld phones really started to be something everyone had.

Tim had asked for Barbara’s help after he hadn’t been able to recover the erased text messages for some days. Tim had filled her in on his discovery that while all the numbers coded into the phone led to a “the number you have called cannot be reached” message when called from the phone - some of the numbers were actually active when looked up; the Jazz one led to a pizza place and the Dad number led to an elderly woman with Chinese heritage who had no relation to anyone named Danny or Fenton. The rest of the numbers weren’t currently in use.

It was odd however that despite those two numbers being in use, they still got the cannot be reached message. Tim had suggested the program which made the phone able to piggyback on the mobile network without a sim was faulty, but it had been easy enough for Barbara to disprove by calling a local number which connected with no problem. Tim was brilliant but sometimes he got too caught up in his complicated theories that he forgot the simple things.

Her recovery program for the text messages had just finished running (this was her third attempt). She took a sip of coffee, leaned forward and promptly nearly spat it out when she saw the result. It went down the wrong pipe when she tried to recover and she coughed and sputtered. Carefully she put her cup on her desk before she spilled it.

Finally her airways were clear and she rubbed the bridge of her nose. Somehow this was Dick’s fault.

She had recovered the messages. They were there - time stamps and all. The last message received was over a decade ago in 2009 and wasn’t that ominous? But that was a side note to be pondered later, because the contents of the messages, oh this was malicious.

Somehow, before deletion every single message had been changed to “Ghost”.

Not just a single ghost, no, entire messages teasing at their original length, but just changed into ghost ghost ghost ghost ghost. A whole litany of ghosts.

And it was definitely Dick’s fault.

So that was it, hopefully I will be able to get back in the swing of things now. Commentary and tags are a great motivator and I read them all. As stated this is last time I tag people, so in the future you can subscribe to the masterlist or on Ao3 where the edited and hopefully better version eventually goes up.

Tag list of doom part 1:

#Jason is catnip to Danny #Missed Connections #dead on main #these next three parts are going to be following a theme #as Jason gets steadily more unhinged #sorry dear #it's necessary #dp x dc

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buckyalpine · 1 year

Note

always you’s angst only ending … feed us a tiny lil drabble of maybe bucky not stopping until he and bruce and maybe even shuri (cause bby’s the smartest) find a way to bring her back?

like he enters the portal, scoops up her body, and kisses her back to life. then throws her over his shoulder, locks her in his bedroom, and makes love to her for like a week straight.

“she’s barely been back for a month- AND SHE’S ALREADY PREGNANT?!”

- ur local angst slut who’s actually hella sensitive and cannot handle this shit, gossip girl 💋

Always you angst alternative ending

18+

Okay YES, if your a pure angst fiend, you may ignore this but I'm here to mend hearts from the sadness that was this fic.

Warnings: Angst, FLUFFFFFFF, Smuuuttttt, happy ending

5 years later

Bucky refused to accept you being gone. He tried to heal, going to therapy, grief counselling, medication, writing letters, everything under the fucking sun to help him come to terms with the fact that he’d never see you again.

It was impossible.

It ate him alive.

He was physically stronger, pouring all his time into the gym to find a way to numb the pain but he was more mentally fucked than ever.

It had been 5 years, nearly 6 and the raw pain he felt was still fresh. Every night, he'd wake up searching for you. He couldn't let go, holding onto the pieces you had left behind. He wrote to you as often as he could, keeping a locked diary of things he wanted to tell you, letters he knew no one would see but what else could he do when he wanted to talk to you so badly but you weren’t there.

That didn’t stop him from finding a way to pour his heart and soul somewhere.

_________________________________

Happy Birthday babygirl, I wish I could wake you up with kisses today, tell you how special the world is with you in it, make you pancakes, feed you in bed because I know you’ll cuddle up in the sheets until noon. Buy you a pretty dress, take you out, maybe even go dancing, even if its just me and you and Steve’s playlist of songs from the 40′s. I’d hold you close to me all night until your feet were sore or until Tony told us to turn the cheesy music off.

I know he secretly ships us (Peter taught me that word)

If it were up to Stark, he’d throw you the biggest birthday party ever; that wouldn’t stop me from trying to sneak you away for some more birthday kisses. birthday cuddles. Birthday sex...is a new song Sam introduced me to.

I wanted to do so much with you today sweet girl. Show you how much I love you on your special day. I should have shown you before it was too late. I regret it every single day. I’d give anything for just another day, just so you’d know.

It was always you.

Steve brought you some flowers today, Sam brought some balloons. I hope you see them from wherever you are. It’s not the same without you here angel.

We miss you baby.

I miss you.

Till we meet again, JBB

_________________________________

Hi Baby, I know it’s not a special occasion, I have no real reason to write today. I missed you though. I wanted to tell you about how I jumped out of a plane today and all I could think of is how much you would have laughed because I didn’t use a parachute. You’re laugh is the sweetest sound in the world and I’d give anything to hear it just one more time.

Sam recorded it all, you would have been the first person he showed the footage to. I’d probably ignore you both and then you’d probably tease me about being grumpy and I’d want a kiss to feel better. And a hug. Maybe some cuddles. Please?

Also you’d be proud of me today, Red Wing broke and it wasn’t my fault. Promise. I even apologized to Sam after but he doesn’t think I’m being sincere. And I’m not because red wing is a little shit. So is Sam.

I miss you sweets. I wish you were here. It hurts. Everything hurts.

I hope we meet again. I’ll never let you go.

Yours, JBB

_________________________________

My y/n,

I’m sorry. I should have told you. I regret it everyday. I’ll never stop trying to find a way to get you back.

I love you,

JBB

_________________________________

It’s been almost 6 years. It still hurts.

Till we meet again, JBB

_________________________________

I can’t anymore. I need you back.

JBB

_________________________________

There were some days where Bucky was able to focus, writing as much as he could, spilling all of his feelings onto the paper, a tiny part of him hoping that one day he’d be able to give you all his letters so you’d know you were all he could think of.

Then there were the days where sobs tore through his body, his breathing labored, only managing to scribble three words before crumbling into a dark abyss. Bucky wracked his brain every single day; if you were able to go back once, there had to be a way to get you back again. Bruce and Tony had spent countless hours in the lab trying to find a way to reopen the portal but nothing led to you.

*****

Bucky stared at his burner, pressing call and ending it before it could go through multiple times before finally letting it ring. There was only one other person he could turn to. He knew he wasn’t going to be immediately welcomed back into Wakanda but this wasn’t just about him. Everyone wanted you back. Nothing was the same without you there. If there was a 1% chance to get you back, he had to try. His chest felt tight as the jet landed in a secluded area having arranged a private meeting with Shuri, the one person he trusted with his life.

"I-I have a favor to ask" Bucky's eyes were already pleading with her, his heart racing as he approached her, ready to fall on his knees.

"Anything Sergeant Barnes" Shuri smiled, sensing he was there for something urgent, nodding for him to continue. There was zero hesitation as she immediately agreed to come back with him to try and get you back, bringing her own lab equipment with her so she could work with Bruce. After filtering through a number of timelines and timestamps, she’d managed to pinpoint the portal to find you but it wasn’t without its consequences.

“You understand you may not return” Shuri whispered as Bucky threw on his tactical gear, insisting on getting you all on his own while rest of the team watched in pin drop silence, reluctantly letting him go alone “And y/n...we can get her back but there's a chance she may not...”

She squeezed his hand before he stepped onto the platform, not wanting to finish the sentence but he already understood. He knew it was possible he’d find you again but it didn’t mean he’d find you alive.

“Then at least I get to say goodbye” He gave her a strained smile; he had to bring you home one way or another. If this was how he had to go, he would run happily to his death; he’d be at peace knowing he died trying to find you. With the push of a button, he was instantly thrown into a warp, transported to where you had last been with Nat. Everything came to a halt as he found himself at an abandoned hydra base, the cold nipping his skin. Bucky blinked, his vision focusing on the fuzzy figure laying on the ground, his feet moving before he could process anything.

There was no one else around.

It was you.

His doll.

His y/n.

He sprinted to you, tears clouding his vision as he approached you, dropping to his knees, both fear and hope fighting for dominance. He found you. You were there. But would he ever actually get you back? Were you even breathing?

“Y/n?” Bucky cradled you to him, scooping you in his arms and chasing the portal that had already began to close. He held your face to his neck, his metal hand protecting your head, holding you securely against his body as you both fleshed back to the present.

The team gasped as he appeared on the platform again with you safely tucked in his arms. They didn’t dare move, everyone holding their breaths while Bucky laid you down with you still in his arms, his hand softly stroking your cheek.

“Y/n? Doll?” His heart was beating erratically, your skin was warm, a glimmer of hope burning stronger as he gently shook you, pressing his cool metal hand against your face. “Please”

“C’mon doll, come back to me baby, I have so much I need to tell you” He pleaded, his warm breath fanning against your face, tears brimming his eyes. Tony and Steve itched to whisk you off to the medbay while Sam silently shook his head, wanting to give Bucky an extra minute, hoping you’d be able to wake up in the super soldiers arms where you belonged.

“Baby, wake up sweets” Bucky couldn't help himself, pressing his lips softly to your forehead, trailing feather light kisses down your face while cuddling you. “C’mon I l-love you” His voice cracked, his lips finally pressing against yours. They were still soft, warm, you had to wake up, you had to-

Your lips stirred, your eyes cracking open, taking your first breath as your eyes focused on Bucky.

“Sweetheart?” Bucky's eyes grew wide, unsure if he was dreaming or not, scrambling to hug you closer, cupping your face gently.

“Bucky?” Your voice was a raspy whisper, leaning into his touch, feeling his tears fall onto your skin as he pulled you into his chest.

“My doll” He let out a soft sob, cradling your head as you buried your face into his neck, moved to cling onto him, the last thing you remembered was darkness and now you were in his arms again surrounded by his warmth, his scent. Everyone stayed rooted in place, tears falling freely, dying to grab you, hug you, hold you again but they were not about to separate the two of you, not after how badly Bucky had yearned to get you back.

“Bucky” You wept, your mind still piecing together how you were back but it didn’t matter, not when he was holding you again.

“Hi baby” He whispered against your hair, wiping your tears with his thumb, cupping your face, kissing you all over before capturing your lips again, relishing in your touch, feeling your fingers card through his short locks. You lost yourselves in each other, the rest of the world no longer existing.

“Okay white wolf, When do we get to say hi to our girl” Sam snorted, sniffling seeing you tucked in Bucky’s arms, the brunettes lips curved into a smile for the first time since you’d been gone. Bucky loosened his hold around you, helping you to your feet, giving you one more kiss before letting go.

“Come here” Steve scooped you up immediately after, struggling not to squeeze you tight, “We missed you sweet heart, so much”

“Hasn’t been the same without you” Sam gave you a once over, determining you were well enough for a slightly bone crushing hug before having you grabbed away by Tony. Tony wasn’t able to say much, biting his bottom lip to keep it from trembling, hugging you the longest, reluctant to let you go. You were engulfed in Nat’s arms as she wept, squeezing you like her life depended on it.

“You saved me” She whispered in your hair, her tears falling onto your skin, “Don’t ever do that again” She hissed sternly, grabbing your face to look at her, “Don’t ever ever do something like that again”

“Give me my baby back” Bucky grabbed you, tossing you over his shoulder as soon as everyone had gotten their hugs and kisses, not interested in giving anyone a second longer when he needed you so badly. You squealed, giggling as he carried you straight down the hall towards his room without glancing back. As soon as he locked the door, his hands were all over you, holding you tightly to him.

“Your baby?” You shyly whispered as he rested his forehead against yours, nodding and chasing your lips.

“M’never letting you go again doll, never” He trailed kisses down your neck while unbuckling the straps of your gear letting it drop to the floor. “I want to love you, I want to hold you, I want to make love to you, I want it all with you”

Bucky tore your clothes off, hoisting you up to wrap your legs around his waist as he carried you over to the bathroom, turning the hot water on, hot water pouring over both if you. The steam made you woozy, your body turning into jelly under his touch as he massaged your muscles with delicate touches, his lips ghosting over every bruise and scar that had marked your skin. You let out a needy whimper, staying close to him, your butterflies erupting in your tummy every time he touched you.

“Bucky please”

“I want to love you so badly baby, love you the way you deserve” Bucky willed himself not to take you right there, focused on rinsing off and grabbing a towel, carrying you over to his bed. He tossed to towel off, climbing on top of you, neither of you having the patience for a slow build or teasing. Your belly clenched feeling his hard length rut and rub against your bare cunt, your slick coating his cock.

“I need you” He rasped while you whined, wrapping your legs around him, bucking your hips up. “You have no idea baby, God I need you” His eyes were pleading with you, his cock starting to leak feeling your arousal.

“Wanna feel you Bucky” You spread your legs for him, your breath hitching feeling the tip of his cock rub through your folds before pressing into your entrance.

“Gonna make love to you so good sweet girl” Bucky whispered as he started to push his cock in, his heart beating faster, cock growing harder feeling your heat pull him in deeper. He groaned, letting his body weight fall onto you as he started to thrust, pleasure consuming both of you immediately.

“JAmessss” Your gasp melted into a moan, your head pressed against his pillow as he filled you, stretching you open, letting you feel every ridge and vein of his cock. “Stretching me to so good Buckyyy”

“Yeah? You feel so good wrapped around me baby” He rasped, his orgasm already creeping down his spine as he pressed sloppy kisses all over your face, overwhelmed with emotion and the feeling of you under him. Your moans made him twitch, nearly growling when he felt your nails dig into his skin as he kissed your cervix with each roll of his hips.

“I missed you so much baby, didn’t know what to do with myself, I-I couldn’t breathe without you, couldn’t live-” Bucky could feel tears brimming his eyes, struggling to keep them away, “Fuck I missed you so much, I felt like I was drowning every single day”

You sniffled over his words, your heart connected with his, squeezing your thighs around his waist, desperate to keep every inch of his body pressed with yours.

“It-it was always you” He kissed your forehead, as he kept you caged under him, moaning against your skin.

“I love you” you cupped his cheeks, brushing his tears away, his nose lightly bumping against yours. You pulled him down for a sweet kiss, only pulling away for air. All of it was so much all at once, the quietest cries and softest kisses, feeling every inch of each other, making up for lost time. Bucky pulled the covers over you both, wrapping you in a cocoon of warmth, hiding you from the rest of the world, savoring this moment with just the two of you, his sweet girl back in his arms again.

He let his arms roam across your body, stroking your waist, your thighs, gently cupping your breasts, softly suckling your nipples, his body trembling as he tried to hold his climax off and make this moment last forever.

“M’gonna marry you, you know that?” His hands came to lace with yours, pinning you against the bed, eyes locked with yours. His pace didn’t falter, thrusting into you, loving the way your pussy fluttered around his cock, rolling his hips so he could push into you deeper. “W-will you? Will you marry me babygirl”

He knew you had just come back but he wanted nothing more, unable to stop the words from slipping out. You let your own tears fall down your cheeks, pulling him impossibly closer.

“Yes” You whimpered, sniffling back sobs as he stroked your head, smiling against your lips.

“Gonna make you my wife baby, marry you and take care of you until my last breath” He started to fuck you faster, panting, the muscles in his body tensing.

“Tell me more Bucky, please?” You whined, your heart aching for more, everything you’d always wanted with the one person you’d always been in love with.

“Oh baby, M’gonna get you pregnant sweet girl, have a family with you, everything with you, take care of your swollen belly, make love to you even when you’re full of me, show you how much I adore you princess” You gasped as he braced himself, his grunts growing louder, his body heat radiating off him, unable to stop the pleasure that was growing.

“Tell me your mine baby” He whined, wrapping his arms around you while you threw your head back, your eyes rolling back at the feel of his pubic bone rubbing your sensitive bundle of nerves with each thrust.

“I’m yours Bucky”

“Fuck don’t stop y/n, please, I need it” His voice was needy, desperately clinging onto your body, craving to hear nothing else. “Say it again doll”

“I’m yours Bucky, all yours soldier” You moaned louder, your legs shaking around him “I’m gonna cum”

“Cum with me baby, same time, please”

“BuckyBuckyBucky- You cried our, your walls staring to flutter, ready to fall off the edge with hi.

“M’right here, I got you, togther, c’mon, cum with me princess” Bucky rolled his hips, pounding you into the mattress, biting down onto your neck as he felt your nails scratch down his back while white hot pleasure tore through you, your pussy milking his cock.

“FUCK JAMES” Your body trembled as he fucked you through your high, burying his face into your neck, his lips brushing by your ear.

“YES, Yes baby, my good girl, my sweet girl, s’perfect for me, yes, I’m gonna give you my cum, get you pregnant, have a baby with you, take care of you, love you, all of it with you baby, fuck- I LOVE YOU- UGGHHH-

Bucky collapse on you, filling you with his cum until the bed was damp, his body jolting from sensitivity each time you fluttered around him while kissing his temple. He hardly moved, a steady stream of cum still pouring into you, staying connected to you the entire night, cuddling you next to him.

“I finally have my baby back, my sweet sweet baby, she’s back”

It has been nearly a week since you were back but you hadn’t left Bucky’s room once. You only took a few moments to eat and sleep, the rest of the time wrapped up in each other, connected in the most intimate way possible, while whispering sweet nothings,

It was everything Bucky needed. Emotional. Warm. Soft. Loving.

He couldn’t help the tears every time he was inside you, he finally had you back, wrapping his arms around you every time you made love, making sure you knew exactly how much he had always adored you. As much as he wanted to take you apart in every way imaginable, he couldn’t help but slip into missionary every single time, wanting to see your pretty face, feel your body, have your legs wrap around him as he came inside you.

*****

You threw on your coat while Bucky slipped his arm around your waist while you both made your way down, passing through the living room on our way out.

“Damn future Mrs. Barnes” Sam whistled, along with the rest of the team, everyone gathered for a night for a movie. “Where you off to?”

“The three of us are going out for dinner” Bucky smiled with a child like grin, snickering to himself while the team looked at you with confusion.

“Three?” Steve cocked his head, noting the way you shied into Bucky’s chest, giggling while he kissed your head, his hand slipping down to brush over your belly. “THREE?”

Steve’s eyes grew wide as he shot out of his seat, pointing at your tummy. “THREE” He whipped his head to Tony, Nat, Sam and Clint who slowly connected the dots. “THREE”

“For fucks sake, it hasn’t even been a month Barnes” Tony snorted, while everyone pilled onto you both, a large mess of hugs and tears.

“You didn’t waste any time, huh” Sam wiggling his eyebrows while Bucky wrapped his arms around you, his hands splayed on your tummy.

“Never again” He whispered, tilting your chin to kiss you deeply, “Never ever again”

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valentine-writes · 8 months

Text

their "i love you"s and other drabbles...

「 tws + notes: no tws, HEAVILY unedited, a little angst in sum partz but f it we ball (THERE'S SUMN WRONG W/ ME I NEVER DO THIS MUCH?), fluff, tried to add a lil bit of everyone, little thoughtz abt the characters,,, 」

↳ ft. ben reilly/scarlet spider, gwen stacy, hobie brown/spider-punk, jessica drew, lyla, margo kess, miles morales (1610 and 42), miguel o'hara/spider-man 2099, pavitr prabhakar, peter b parker, spider-man noir, and the spot/johnathan ohnn

「 gn!reader, romantic relationships <3 」

author's note: not my usual content but thought it wud b fun to whip up a few drabbles,, (´。＿。｀) diff format than usual too! all separate and stuff, w/ the characterz at the bottom being the ones the drabble applies to the most (ALL CAPZ MEANS I THOUGHT IT FIT THEM SUPER WELL!!!!) thought it wud b fun,,, altered lyrics are italicized, itz jus a pronoun change 2 make it gender neutral (❁´◡`❁) edit: my tags. do not fit. so i had to redo them. reblogz r super appreciated ^_^ i jus wanna make sure all fans of these characterz are being fed content <33

[ please don't forget about me - pompey ]

"and if you see me everyday / will I lose my shine?"

↳ always terrified of not being exciting and new to you– like one day, their appeal will fade. not like they understand what drew you to them in the first place, but they never asked. maybe you're just hanging around for the hell of it. maybe one day, they'll watch you leave and they'll have nothing to convince you to stay

"how many bad jokes will it take? / or awkward quiet times?"

↳ they wonder if they're already losing you slowly. everytime they speak to you, it's like they're trying to compensate for something. begging you to look at them– but not too close,,, just in case you notice how brutally flawed they are, beyond just the quirks you find endearing. maybe one day you'll look too deep into their eyes and you won't like what you see

▸ JOHNATHAN OHNN/THE SPOT, peter b parker

[ soft sounds from another planet - japanese breakfast ]

"i'll show you the way to hurt me"

↳ loving again is the biggest risk anyone who's been hurt like them could take. you make it worth the danger– the possibility of the pain they've grown all too familiar with. maybe for today, caution can be set aside. when it comes to you, they wouldn't mind letting their guard down.

"in search of a soft sound from another planet / in search of a quiet place to lay this to rest."

↳ they have to admit their past has burdened them in ways they can't even begin to communicate. they know you can't fix everything that has been broken in their lives. still, the comfort you provide is never taken for granted. you are their safe space– the soft sound from another planet. their quiet place to finally lay it all to rest. and suddenly, the aching in their chest doesn't eat them up inside as much as it used to.

you make it easy to love again.

▸ GWEN STACY, MIGUEL O'HARA/SPIDER-MAN 2099

[ our lullabye - miracle musical ]

"i was made for you / you were made for me"

↳ it's hard to believe that you're more than just a distant fantasy sometimes. they can't deny how much they've yearned for a love like the one you two share. something so sweet, so real. it's nothing like the movies or the fairytales, but is anything ever? even when things are messy and complicated, it's undeniable how perfect it all feels. how everything about the two of you just fits. they're inclined to thank every shooting star they've ever wished on, every birthday candle they've ever held their deepest desires in as they blew the flame out for the day you two met. by any manner of higher power or forces unseen to the human eye, they're certain fate was on their side to give them such a blessing.

"i'll love you 'till you're gone / our song goes on and on"

↳ they're determined to hold on as long as possible. all good things cannot last– but they try not to dwell on that thought. they hold onto the hope that you're the one thing that will stay. your love feels divine. radiant, in the way it overtakes them fully. they almost feel undeserving. so, no matter how small or how grand the action, they try to remind you every day, "i love you"s woven into their every being whenever you're around.

▸ lyla, SPIDER-MAN NOIR, johnathan ohnn/the spot

[ i will - mitski ]

"everything you feel is good / if you would only let you"

↳ sometimes they feel you holding back. they can't help but notice the tension in the room as you suppress the things you want to say, silence the thoughts in your head. they know it's not easy to be earnest all the time. but they love you– they care for you. and all they've ever wanted is for you to be authentic. if it's pure, how could it ever be wrong? maybe in your own time, you'll be able to unravel in front of them. they're by your side every step of the way. to finally have you open up to them– to be real, to be honest– it would mean the world to them. they want to show you they love every single part of you. they love you when you're upset, when you're crying, when you're angry– because it's you.

"so stay with me / hold my hand / there's no need / to be brave"

↳ they offer every reassurance they can give you. you no longer have to fend for yourself. those days of being alone are over. you can crumble apart if you need– there's no need for constant bravery anymore. you did such a good job picking yourself up, time and time again. now, they outstretch a hand to you, a silent way of saying, "let me help you this time."

▸ ben reilly/scarlet spider, gwen stacy, HOBIE BROWN/SPIDER-PUNK, JESSICA DREW, lyla, MILES MORALES (1610), PAVITR PRABHAKAR, PETER B PARKER tbh all of them but shhh

[ right side of my neck - faye webster ]

"you looked back at me once / but i looked back two times"

↳ absolutely smitten with you. it doesn't matter how hard you fell. they. fell. harder. and maybe it's not obvious to you. but they've never had someone who made them care so much. some part of them feels immature for feeling so in love,, like a school kid with a puppy crush. they find it ridiculous, how absolutely lovesick and enamoured they are with everything about you. whatever you feel and express towards them, they feel towards you three times as much. they try everyday to show it.

"the right side of my neck / still smells like you"

↳ you just seem to leave a part of you with them always. they can't ignore it– can't seem to escape your presence, even when you're not physically there. it felt like spiralling to insanity at first. but they've learned to appreciate it– find comfort in it, even. the way the smell of your shampoo lingers on the pillow they leant you when you stayed over, the way that the mug of tea (made just the way you like it) is still on the kitchen table from the morning after– you left your t-shirt once and you had to ask them directly for it back. they like keeping pieces of you near. it reminds them of how loved they are.

▸ BEN REILLY/SCARLET SPIDER, gwen stacy, HOBIE BROWN/SPIDER-PUNK, MARGO KESS, miles morales (1610 and 42), pavitr prabhakar, the spot/johnathan ohnn

[ you love me - kimya dawson ]

"but when i met you, right away, i knew / you would never, ever, ever hurt me"

↳ you're used to pulling away. leave before they can leave you, before they even try to make you miss them– but the second you met them? they were insistent on proving that they were harmless. they could never dream of hurting you. and they see as you pull away, scared to get too close– and yet, every single time, they open their arms back to you.

"and the road's still long but you come along / and you hold my hand, and you understand"

↳ "when you're ready" has become second place in their favourite three word sentences. they remind you of these words constantly.

"when you're ready" means they don't mind that it's not now. ""when you're ready" means it doesn't matter how long they have to wait for you, they will. when you're ready" is another form of "i love you"

▸ MARGO KESS, MILES MORALES (1610), pavitr prabhakar, PETER B PARKER, spider-man noir

[ (you) on my arm - leith ross ]

"i wanna buy you pretty little things / and never ever lie to you"

↳ wants something simple with you. craves a form of sweet, normalcy. the mundane tasks and events of life seem far more appealing to them when you're in the picture. no, they never really imagined ever having a quiet life, yet the hope for one with you lingered. to buy you little gifts, to be the best they could possibly be to you, to drive around with you for the hell of it. they're certain anything could be heaven if you were there to accompany them.

a quiet life sounds nice.

"i'd be better armed if you agreed to take it"

↳ having you on their arm just makes them feel secure. keeping you close while showing you off to the world– showing you've got each other. they're a bit sappy for little things like this. everywhere you go, they never fail to extend an arm out to you. something about you makes them feel safer than ever.

▸ jessica drew, miles morales (1610), MILES MORALES (42), peter b parker, SPIDER-MAN NOIR

[ peach scone - hobo johnson ]

"so I fall to ground, collect myself and get ready to take over your heart / or at least your spare time"

↳ they try so incredibly hard to be the one for you. no matter what they try, they just seem to fumble and mess it up. they stumble over their words when they try to compliment you, they get weak in the knees when they try to make a move, and no matter how much they spend deliberating, and deliberating– they've got no clue how to win you over. hopefully you find their clumsy attempts endearing. they're making a fool of themself. and maybe, they haven't really said anything yet– but they're happy to at least hang around you in the meantime

▸ BEN REILLY/SCARLET SPIDER, gwen stacy, MILES MORALES (1610), spider-man noir, the spot/johnathan ohnn

[ dan the dancer - mitski ]

" he liked them more than life itself / i'm sure "

↳ he was quiet in the way he expressed his adoration. still, he did everything he could to ensure you would never go unloved. the way he looks into your eyes, taking you in like you are the loveliest thing on earth... it's only fitting. you're his world. maybe in the silent moments, when his fingers gently brush your cheek, admiring you– you'd begin to understand this.

▸ MILES MORALES (42), MIGUEL O'HARA/SPIDER-MAN 2099

[ lover // over the moon - alice phoebe lou ]

"i'm a lover / i feel it now / i'm a lover / just never knew how"

↳ they don't even try to hide how much they enjoy your company. you're special to them– why would they try to hide that? at this point, whenever you feel arms wrap around you from behind, you've learned to see their grinning face when you glance over your shoulder. maybe they've never been particularly shy about most things,, but now they're just twice as loud. it's inexplicable, the things you do to them. they hadn't anticipated being so utterly soft,,, not like they're complaining

▸ hobie brown/spider-punk, PAVITR PRABHAKAR

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neptunes-sol-angel · 5 months

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What's the 2024 canon event in your universe?

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Pile One 🕷

Your Canon event that cannot be interfered with: There's going to be a tremendous amount of movement for you in 2024. This could look like traveling, ascending in your endeavors, plans playing into motion, but the main thing that's standing out to me is that you won't be doing this alone. There's a lot of group activity here with friends, family, or co workers who you have a healthy relationship with. This could also indicate a lot of celebrations or ceremonies regarding success in what you accomplish next year. I keep getting this image of gears moving non-stop, which to me it looks like you're pushing through anything physically and mentally. Some of you could be start working out as a new hobby or something else that requires you to uncover barriers within yourself that you never thought you could exceed. Maybe this is inspiration to pull yourself out of something in the past that has been making you feel like you should just lay in stagnation, or maybe you're tirelessly moving because you have to, but either way, you're making moves that you should see positive results in the year of 2024.

Pile Two

Your Canon event that cannot be interfered with : You are going to learn either from circumstances that corner them or through self-reflection (can even be both) that will make you learn how to take more accountability. This is about making changes in the way that you have been reacting to stuff that boils down to the multiple ways that you have been self-sabotaging. Knowing when to walk away when you've put your all into a person that isn't doing the work to meet you half-way. Withdrawing your energy from situations that seek to get you out of character. Understanding the value in your emotions instead of pushing them aside or allowing other people to invalidate them. 2024 is the year for your voice to be heard. You'll improve in how you communicate with others, especially amongst conflict, discovering your unmet needs that you didn't even know were needs, solitude that will bring you more peace that'll draw away from the loneliness you may feel in working on yourself. You could even be finding out what spirituality actually means to you as well. Overall, I'm getting the feeling that you're walking away from the noise that's discrediting your discernment, you're going to find out that you aren't crazy as some people tried to make you ought to be.

Pile Three

Your Canon event that cannot be interfered with : 2024 for you is going to be about uncovering a lot of secrets and I'm not talking about anxiety inducing kind. This year is going to be exciting for you and about revealing what your self-concept is. Tapping into your sexuality, finding the things that compliment your beauty, or your "recipe" that just makes life work for you, having more freedom financially, romantically, or other areas that you may have felt restricted in. I feel like most of your months are going to be eventful to the point where you may pause temporarily throughout the year because you may feel like you need to chill out, or life just feels "too" good. This could be related to certain indulgences or this could be some fear creeping on you that'll make you doubt the positive things going on with you in life. Other people could find you impulsive, but that's really none of their business, a lot of the blessing that you receive in 2024 comes from taking leaps of faith and being assertive in searching for things that you want to take a chance on.

#🎄: 25 days of neptunes sol angel #day five #divination #intuitive #psychic #pick a card #tarot #spirituality #pac #tarotblr #pick a pile #pick a picture #the tarot community #spiderman #across the spiderverse

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pyroclastic727 · 5 months

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The Marvels is being scathed by critics, and that's a good thing.

I finally saw The Marvels today. I'm a bit late to the party, so all I saw about the movie was the teaser at the end of Ms Marvel, and way too many critical reviews of it.

Now, obviously on Tumblr you find the good reviews, like, the cats outnumbering the white men and how Kamala Khan is, like, basically all of us. But in person, I've had someone tell me that it's bad because Rotten Tomatoes rates it 43%, which-- besides wondering why anyone would listen to Rotten Tomatoes, I'd have to wonder why the website would give it such a low rating. The easy answer is that the Tomatoes review committee is populated by white men, who, upon having no one to relate to, react badly to the movie. But I think there's more to it.

The Marvels is a revolution. Through its character-driven writing and brazen exploration of morality, it rewrites the superhero formula completely, by questioning what exactly it means to be a superhero.

The Marvels was directed by Nia DaCosta, an award-winning Harlem native and creative visionary whose approach to this film was to define these characters as humans, not as superheroes. Her approach to heroism directly addresses that the idea that a hero is not always right. A hero, DaCosta claims, is "someone who's trying their best with the information and tools they have at the time. They'll always get it wrong." Carol Danvers's arc directly addresses this, as the resolution of her subplot involves her re-igniting the sun that she snuffed out. Her heroic act is to undo the damage that she wrought.

When compared to old Marvel, this message just doesn't come through. In WandaVision, Wanda's grief is for a family that was killed by the Avengers. Yet, she is painted as a villain, even as she searches for a happy home, even as she at one point joins the Avengers. The Avengers cannot undo what they did, and don't really try. They defeat the big bad, sacrifice their lives, but nothing brings back Wanda's family. Nothing undoes that war. No one searches for Wanda after the event, to try to help her with her grief, except for Monica, and she's working against orders. Their heroics are militant, but while they excel at destruction, they leave the people they hurt in the dust.

This antiheroic plot of old Marvel is precisely what appealed to so many American audiences. Their protagonists are: a rich corporation, a super-soldier, a privileged teenager, a scientist who makes weapons, an ex-convict, a man born into godlike power, and I'm sure there are others but I don't actually care that much... (these would be iron man, captain america, peter parker spiderman, hulk, antman, thor, and etc). All these archetypes appeal to American ideals that the wealthy would sympathize with. They claim that there are people who are inherently bad and seek the power that they have, in the way that a poor person might want a job that a wealthy person wants their child to secure. They claim that it is their business to save those which cannot save themselves, and use this to get involved in wars that are not theirs, and beat up badguys whose backstory they have no way of knowing-- and they punch before they stop and listen.

They are cops in every sense of the word. The responsibility of the vigilante is to defend against evil, but part of that responsibility is to figure out who exactly is evil and who is in need of help.

The Marvels creates a team that tries to distinguish evil from good, and delves into the grey area between them. The final battle between Carol Danvers and Dar-benn has the superhero pinning the grey-haired antagonist to the ground as she begs for, then demands, that Carol fix what she damaged. Monica urges her to listen. Through this, The Marvels argues that a hero does not always beat up the bad guy and fight against unrelenting evil, but that a hero can be wrong, and that a hero can reconsider. It's kindness in the way that is revolutionary, where it's much easier to choose cruelty.

The fact that the movie is getting torn apart by critics, then, is not just because it is a "girls movie" or it doesn't have a strong white man for the white male viewer to sympathize with. The Marvels cannot appeal to Marvel fans because it rewrites the genre itself. It takes a film series whose purpose was to depict the struggles of cops, of the wealthy, of people with too much power who are trying to learn how to responsibly wield it, but don't. And it gives that power to people who have watched superheroes try and fail, who are slowly learning to be better heroes than the ones before them.

The next generation is a critique of the last, a group trying not to make the mistakes of the chosen ones that came before them, and as such, the movie exists to critique the movies that came before it. Therefore, a viewer of Marvel who would positively review it, due to sympathizing with the previous heroes and enjoying the power fantasy, would dislike it out of its existence being critical and contradictory to the films they like themselves.

The Marvels is not for Marvel fans-- at least, not those who saw the Avengers as purely heroes. Instead, the film reaches out to people who would have been against the old Avengers, who want a story that dismantles the unquestioned idealism of superheroes and writes about people trying to protect their communities and the people they care about.

So, let the critics complain. The MCU is shedding its roots as a pro-cop and pro-colonialism power fantasy, and evolving into an exploration of what it means to be a true hero.

#the marvels #ms marvel #captain marvel #photon #kamala khan #monica rambeau #carol danvers #.pyro #pyro.txt #the marvels analysis #can you tell that i loved this movie #it's been so long since i've done an analysis but this one SPOKE to me #anyways i'm coming from the perspective of a marvel hater until i watched ms marvel #honestly i just put the images in there to break it up. they are not very relevant. i didn't pirate so i don't have good screenshots

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forjongseong · 3 months

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medialuna // jay (ENHYPEN)

pairing: secretary!jay x CEO!fem!reader (part 12 of the series)

genre: office!au, fluff, smut (minors dni) // warning: older reader; Jay calls reader “Boss”; mentions of anxiety, pregnancy; oral sex (m. receiving, f. receiving); unprotected sex; profanity; semi-public sex? (jay uses a sex toy on y/n); mentions of death; CEO!yn has a health scare towards the end // wc: ~11k

previous (and upcoming) chapters:

(check the whole masterlist here!)

summary: married life with Jay turns out to be even better than you can ever imagine, but work-life seems to be wearing the two of you out, and sometimes certain things do come when you least expect them.

author’s notes: he's back! and I'm back! welcome back!

I cannot believe the last sec!Jay episode was posted literally IN MAY 2023!!! I am so sorry! I had it all planned out... I was going to celebrate this series' first anniversary and have it end in the same month... and I swear I already started writing part 12 even before I released the last two minisodes, but then I got stuck for the longest time, and also busy, but now I am back, so here is part 12.

if you check the lyrics to this song that I used as a title you'll see why I used it. as always, if you find any typos or grammatical errors please message me!!

taglist: @thots4hee @jayked @end-hyphen @nyanggk @yoursjaeyun @maggstar @bucketofhiros @dimplejaehyuncutie @excusememissiloveyou @shinkenprincess-oh @mochimchimo @jongseonglogy

(send an ask if you want to be added or removed)

It was dark and cold when you opened your eyes. You blinked a couple of times before your gaze shifted to your right, and sure enough, you found his side empty. There was a lump in your throat, and somehow you felt parched. You touched your face only to feel dried tears staining your cheek.

After a couple more seconds, you started to panic, yanking the blanket away from your body and frantically searching for the only source of comfort that you had. The bathroom was empty, so you walked out of your bedroom and scanned the huge living room. You only found unpacked boxes and your sofa still wrapped in plastic, and even the lights in the kitchen were off.

Your hands began to tremble as you made your way to the center of the room. Your head began to spin, and your heartbeat gradually became faster as you tried and failed to gain enough consciousness so early in the morning. Your eyes flickered and you whispered to yourself.

“Phone.”

You went back to your bedroom and immediately grabbed your phone that you had placed on the end table since the night before. You unlocked it and somehow managed to feel even more let down at the lack of notifications. Just as you were about to lose it, you heard the door unlocking and the familiar sound of footsteps entering the house.

Jay was trying his best to make as little noise as possible, but when he saw you walking out of the bedroom, his eyes lit up. Once he registered what was going on though, from the expression on your face, he became worried.

“Hey,” he said softly, just seconds before you threw yourself into his embrace.

You began sobbing on his chest, drenching his shirt in your tears. Your hands were grabbing on the back of his shirt, and with every breath you took your shoulders shook with you. Jay enveloped you in his arms and started making shushing noise.

“It’s okay,” he whispered, squeezing your shoulders. “I’m here. It’s okay.”

Your cries did not seem to be stopping soon, and the sound of your wails created a huge lump in Jay’s throat too. His eyebrows furrowed as he attempted to pull you closer, resting his chin on the top of your head. He did not stop rubbing your back in an attempt to soothe you, and once he heard you quieting down, he started speaking softly.

“Was it a bad dream?” he asked in the lowest voice he could muster.

You merely nodded your head, still burying it in the crook of his neck as you sniffled the tears.

“Were you looking for me?” Jay asked again. You nodded softer this time, and Jay felt horrible. “I’m sorry. I should have left a note or texted you. I didn’t think you would wake up so early. I think I spent way too much time at the gym too.”

You responded only with a sniffle, and you began to loosen the grip on his shirt. Jay immediately took one of your hands off his back and grabbed it tight.

“Here, let me look at you,” he said, trying to pry you away from his body.

You shook your head and hid your face on his chest again, refusing to make eye contact. Jay calmly opened your fist and made you palm his face.

“I’m right here,” he said, placing a hand over yours so you would stay cupping his face. “I’m sorry.”

You shook your head again, and Jay assumed that it meant he did not have to apologize. It was killing him the way you refused to look at him, though, but in reality, you were just embarrassed that you broke down over something so trivial.

Jay turned his face to kiss your palm, and the warmth surged through your whole body. You regained composure, and once you felt calmer, you tilted your face up, nudging your nose to his jawline. In an instant, Jay placed his hand on the back of your neck and pulled you into a kiss.

You kissed him desperately, like you had not seen him in years, and to him it felt like you were trying to breathe in the air inside his mouth. His lips gently danced with yours, stopping in between to let you breathe. His hand never left the back of your head, nor did his arm around your waist, and at that moment you were willing to give anything to make the time stop.

“I love you,” you said as you broke the kiss. Your voice came out as barely a whisper.

Jay nodded, brushing his nose with yours before kissing the corner of your lips softly. He trailed soft kisses from there up to your cheek before stopping on your earlobe. His hand moved up to stroke your hair, making you close your eyes as you listened to his raspy voice right in your ear.

“I love you more.”

---

Jake and Heeseung’s screams of frustration accompanied with Sunghoon’s victorious cackle made the whole room shake. You almost let a clean mug slip out of your hands from the shock, and Jay chuckled at the way you ever so slightly flinched. You looked over your shoulder and saw that the three guys were hunched together, while Isa and Yoon were sitting on the lounge chair across them, eyes glued to the TV.

“I’ll tell them to keep it down,” Jay said, closing in on you and pecking your cheek before he made his way to the living room.

Isa and Yoon’s eyes lit up the moment they saw the tray filled with cold drinks in Jay’s hand, and Sunghoon had to shout at Jake for almost knocking everything down from being so jumpy and chaotic. Heeseung cleared the table to help Jay set the tray down, and then each of them started asking questions about the drinks.

You joined them only after you replied to a couple of messages on your phone, and as you slipped your phone into your pocket you noticed that everyone was already holding their own beverages.

“An informal toast!” Yoon said, raising her glass of iced latte. “To the new house.”

“To the new couple, Mr. and Mrs. Park,” Jake joined in.

“And to Heeseung, for being one of the awardees of our company’s scholarship program,” you ended with a smile.

Heeseung’s jaw dropped, and his eyes widened. Jay was already chuckling, amused at the faces his friends were making.

“Are you serious?” Heeseung asked, looking at you. He then looked at Jay, then at you again.

“Congratulations, buddy,” Jay finally intercepted, nudging Heeseung’s arm with his elbow.

“Cheers!” Sunghoon shouted, surprisingly being the loudest of the group at that very moment.

Three people started talking at once, and you had to jump from one group to another to tend to all their questions.

“So, this housewarming is actually also like a mini wedding reception and like a congratulatory party too? Who is the main character of this party?” Isa asked you, genuinely confused.

“All of you guys, the invitees. And the house maybe,” you replied, smiling sweetly at Isa. “Thank you for coming, girls. I know that you don’t like it when I mix two different groups of friends.”

“That’s bulls, you always nail it when you intentionally introduce your friends to each other. Wasn’t that how we became a trio?” Yoon chimed in, not taking her eyes off her drink.

You continued to talk to the girls for a while until Jake interrupted, claiming that he needed to go to the bathroom, but Sunghoon was taking too long in the guest powder room. You calmly asked Jay to point out the bathroom in the main bedroom before you excused yourself to the kitchen to get a refill on the snacks and drinks.

Not long after, you heard the soft footsteps of Jake waddling towards you. You locked eyes with him, and he was making a concerned and rather uncomfortable face. You immediately started to frown before asking him.

“Is there a problem in the bathroom?” You asked, resting your hand on the counter.

Jake stood beside you and leaned in to be discreet. “You left your sex toy in the bathroom.”

“What?” You half-shouted, half-whispered. “What do you mean?”

“What’s going on here?”

Jay’s voice was calm, but he had it in that lower register that sort of just vibrated, and both you and Jake jumped a little in your places.

“Jake said there’s a sex toy in the bathroom,” you calmly reiterated.

“The fuck are you talking about?” Jay almost spat back in response. You snorted at his reply.

Jake looked at you apologetically before dragging Jay back into the bathroom. You made sure that the others were preoccupied before following the two of them. When you reached the bathroom, you heard Jay’s loud sigh.

“What?” Jake asked, holding up the ‘sex toy’ by its little handle.

Jay’s reaction immediately made sense. You started giggling softly, trying to suppress it from turning into a huge cackle.

“You think that’s a sex toy?” You asked. “That purple spiky-looking thing?”

“Yeah, what do you think we’re supposed to do with it?” Jay added.

Jake visibly cringed. “Ew? I don’t need to know what you two do behind closed doors. I’m just saying if you’re inviting people to your house maybe put away these types of stuff.”

You walked towards Jake, took the ‘sex toy’ from his hand and started pressing it onto his head.

“Noona!” Jake shrieked in horror.

“It’s a scalp massager, Jake! What, just because it’s made of silicone, you automatically assume it’s a sex toy?”

Jay was wheezing against the doorway, and you turned your head to him.

“Baby, don’t laugh like you didn’t think of the same thing when I first bought this.”

Jake’s initially embarrassed face was instantly replaced with relief. The two men then started laughing and yelling at each other while you shook your head and tidied up a little around the sink. When Jay brought up the idea of having a joint get-together of your friends and his, you did not expect it to be this chaotic, but you were glad that you agreed to it.

---

You walked out of your bedroom, one hand rubbing your eye as you tried to stifle back a yawn. The sound coming from the kitchen woke you up, since it was repetitive, and Jay did not seem like he was trying to be quiet. In his defense, he wanted you to know that he was there, so he made loud noises on purpose.

“There’s my beautiful wife,” Jay greeted you as soon as he caught you in his sight. He was doing the rest of last night’s dishes as he waited for breakfast to cook.

“Really?” You chuckled. “I have dried up drool on the corner of my mouth and my hair looks like a bird’s nest.”

“Signs of a good sleep then, that’s nice,” Jay replied nonchalantly. “That means last night I did tire you out, didn’t I?”

Holding back a smile would be useless as Jay was already looking at you with his signature smirk. A proud smirk, you thought. Last night was probably one of the best nights you had with Jay, if you could even list down your favorites.

You had been watching House of the Dragon for a while, and although Jay wasn’t the biggest fan of fantasy mixed with gore, he still sat with you through every episode. It melted your heart that every time a stomach-turning scene was about to come up, Jay would always lean into you and let you hide your face in the crook of his neck until the scene ends.

This time, though, the scene came on without warning and you both gasped loudly at the same time. Your mouth hung open and you knew Jay had the same face despite him rubbing his hand on your shoulder to console you. When the episode ended, you turned to look at him and he smiled apologetically.

“Sorry I wasn’t fast enough to catch that,” he said, pouting.

You quickly turned the TV off and moved to sit on his lap. You thanked him with your mouth, not with words but in a way that you were certain he would appreciate. After a hot minute of making out, you hopped off the sofa and kneeled in front of him, knowing how hard he had already become.

Jay grasped onto the throw pillows and blanket on the sofa as you gave him the suck of his life. He couldn’t stop moaning whenever his tip hit the back of your throat, and the view of him with his exposed and clenched jawline and his eyes rolled back just motivated you to go even harder. He thrusted his hips up and grabbed your arm, which you thought was a warning, so you calmly stroked his thigh until he came in your mouth.

You had to very carefully pull away to not let any of his cum drip to the floor. As you did so, a drop of it trickled down your chin and you swore Jay let out the shakiest breath ever. He sat up and wiped his thumb along your bottom lip, catching the remains and thrusting his thumb into your mouth, making you lick it dry. After that, he rested his hand behind your neck and pulled you into a deep kiss, tasting himself on your tongue.

“Bedroom?” He whispered after you pulled away to catch your breath.

You nodded enthusiastically and the next thing you remember was being naked with him on your new bed with brand new silk sheets. The feeling of the soft sheets contrasting with the way Jay was holding your hips made your heart beat a lot faster, and you desperately tried to slow things down as you took the lead, grinding your hips on his lap as he sat up with you, his cock twitching inside of you every time you clenched around him.

Your hands were touching him everywhere, his cheeks, his jaw, his neck, his shoulders, and as you mustered all the energy you had left to keep the pace, Jay kissed your chin before lifting you up and instantly switching your position. You were now lying on your back, and Jay held your legs spread open as he started to thrust into you faster than before. Your breath hitched and you grasped the sheets behind you, while Jay chased his own high and squeezed your boobs as he released his seed inside of you.

Your heavy breaths were now in sync, and you saw Jay panting, which was something that rarely happens. Usually, you were the only one out of breath, so you couldn’t help but form a small triumphant smile.

“How are we feeling?” you asked as Jay managed to maneuver you both, lying sideways and facing each other without him having to pull out of you.

Jay chuckled softly before kissing the tip of your nose. “I’m so beat right now, fuck.”

You laughed softly and started peppering kisses all over his face, loving the way his arms automatically wrapped around your waist.

“Wasn’t I the one that tired you out?” you said, snapping back to the present and trying to dismiss the image of last night. You did not need to get wet so early in the morning, not when Jay was making breakfast for you both.

“Alright,” Jay replied, wiping his hands on the apron he was wearing. “Let’s say we both did.”

You nodded once and let Jay get back to his thing. He had told you several times that he did not mind being the only one busy in the kitchen, and having you eat whatever he had prepped was rewarding enough.

For you, though, seeing him in the kitchen was a reward in itself, for Jay often cooked or cleaned with sleeveless shirts, or shirtless, or in a unique combination like right now.

“Is that apron really necessary when you’re shirtless like that?” You asked as you sat on the stool facing the counter. You placed your elbows on the counter and rested your chin on the back of your hands.

“I feel like you’re trying to tell me something so why don’t you get to the point?” Jay asked back, smirking at you before diverting his attention back to the meal he was prepping.

“You look very fuckable, husband.”

Jay let out a breathy chuckle before turning around and serving you a plate of omelet with mushrooms and a small portion of salad. You looked at his plate and he had the exact same thing except with cherry tomatoes.

“As much as I’d like to have you for breakfast,” Jay began, “we have a very important meeting this morning and I need you to not skip a meal.”

“Fair,” you replied, smiling when Jay pecked your cheek. He took his apron off before sitting on the stool beside you. “This looks amazing. Thank you, baby.”

“Anything for my queen.”

---

The computer screen in front of you was already set to a dimmer light, but despite that it still hurt your eyes. You had already taken a power nap, finished a cup of iced latte, yet the drowsiness remained. You heard a knock on the door and waited for Jay to let himself in.

“The last meeting of the day is in fifteen, Boss,” Jay said as he walked to you, spinning a pen in his hand and having his iPad secured in his arms. “Still sleepy?”

“You know me best,” you answered, leaning back on your seat and stretching your arms as much as you could. You yawned and Jay had to look away to not catch it too. “I’ll just get cold water.”

Jay looked like he was contemplating something as he watched you walk to the mini bar. After a couple of seconds, he rushed out of the office and before you could even say a word, he returned less than a minute later, holding a small package in his hands.

“I was gonna wait until we got home, but…”

You eyed the box in his hand. He was already smiling at you.

“What do you have there?” you asked, almost too scared to find out the answer.

Jay peeped his head out your door, making sure none of your employees were around. He reckoned that Hwiyoung was on a coffee break, so he calmly closed your door before he made his way back to you.

“Don’t get mad at me, but I ordered this for funsies,” Jay said, giving the box to you.

“You open it.”

Jay sighed and shook his head, thinking that it had been years at this point of him taking orders from you, but he would still do it for another thousand years. He grabbed a pen from your desk and used the tip to break the seal, and within seconds you were looking at a sleek box with a vague image on top of it.

“Is it like a massager? That would make me even sleepier, Jay,” you complained before you could even see the actual item.

“Stay with me,” Jay replied calmly, completely unboxing the item.

It was a two-piece device, one remote and the other…

“It’s magnetic,” Jay explained. “You can clip this to the inside of your panties, and I’ll hold the remote. Wear it during the meeting so you can be alert at all times. When I catch you zoning out, be ready for it to vibrate.”

“You’re fucking joking,” you said, chuckling to yourself. “Right?”

“Baby, I’m very serious,” he replied in his actual serious voice. “When naps and caffeine don’t work, I had to get creative to find a solution.”

“This sounds like more fun for you,” you sighed, taking the device from his hands and examining it up close.

“Well, yes, but you’ll feel the pleasure.”

As you were holding the main device, Jay pressed the remote and it vibrated in your hand. You almost jolted from the shock and you both laughed out loud from your reaction. Jay quickly turned the device off and took it out of your hand.

“I understand if you don’t want to try it now. We can always do it some other time,” Jay said, turning his back to you and already packing the device back into its box.

You licked your lips before you made your decision. You took a step closer to Jay and held his wrist, stopping him.

“I’ll do it.”

---

During most meetings, your presence is usually needed to review your team’s ideas and give necessary feedback. This means that you rarely had to speak, and around eighty percent of the time you would always be listening to other people speak. When you’re sleepy and losing focus, this easy task could be particularly hard to follow.

You and Jay were sitting at the end of the table, the farthest from the whiteboard and the chairs where the speakers were gathered. The meeting room was large enough to have everyone sit with ample space between each other, making them have to lean in if they wanted to whisper a thought. You had both your hands clasped in front of your face, your lips touching your thumbs as you were listening to Keeho’s presentation.

Jay caught you slow blinking several times before you shut your eyes for more than two seconds. He reached into his pocket and pressed a button on the remote. Your body jolted awake, and to quickly hide the reaction you faked a sneeze.

“Bless you, Miss,” Keeho said without missing a beat before continuing to talk.

You side-eyed Jay and he immediately mouthed ‘sorry’ to you. He winked and took his hands out of his pocket, and you relaxed for a moment. The meeting carried on and you started making notes on your journal while waiting for the next speaker to set up. Jay then noticed that the movement of your pen paused, so he slid his hand into his pocket again and pressed the remote.

The shock you expressed this time was in the form of a slam on the table. Your team thought you were losing patience and they apologized to you in an instant, almost in unison. Jay had to bite his lower lip to stop himself from laughing, and once Beomgyu started his presentation, you lightly slapped Jay on his thigh.

You were now paying close attention to Beomgyu and you even commented on a few things, earning more comments from the rest of the team. While Yeji was telling you about her thoughts on one of your remarks, Jay pressed the button on the remote. You couldn’t hold back from letting out a moan this time, but you were quick to put a hand over your stomach.

“Sorry,” you quickly muttered. “That time of the month,” you continued, faking a smile.

“Oh, I can talk to you about this some other time, Miss,” Yeji replied, smiling back with concern. “Maybe Beomgyu could wrap up.”

As your team refocused their attention back to Beomgyu, you shot daggers at Jay with your eyes and a look that said, ‘what the fuck was that for?’. Jay only threw a smug smile as a response.

The meeting was eventually adjourned since it was getting late, and you had always been against your team working overtime unless it was absolutely necessary. That, and the fact that Jay could not stop pressing the remote and driving you crazy.

“You seem to be having way too much fun,” you said to him as you stared at the elevator waiting for it to arrive.

Jay stood proudly beside you, both his hands in his pocket and his head tilted up slightly. You had never seen him this cocky. The elevator then dinged and as you entered, you were relieved to find it empty. However, you heard several people talking and before you knew it, Yeji, Beomgyu, and Keeho joined in the elevator.

“Miss,” Keeho greeted you with a smile. “Going down?”

Beomgyu was about to press the lobby, but you shook your head and Jay cleared his throat.

“Back to the office, actually,” Jay clarified. “You guys can go home though.”

Beomgyu nodded and pressed the number to your floor. The three of them stood in front of you, talking to each other in whispers. The elevator ride down felt like it took so long, and it did not help that Jay pressed the remote in his pocket, again.

“Shit,” you muttered, leaning into Jay and grabbing his arm for support.

Jay’s cocky smile quickly shifted into fake concern once he noticed everyone looking at you.

“Are you okay, Miss?” Beomgyu asked.

“Miss, I have painkillers but they’re at my desk. I can go get it for you,” Yeji chimed in, reaching to touch your arm.

You merely grabbed onto Jay and squeezed his arm unnecessarily hard. Jay winced and chuckled to defuse the tension.

“I got it from here, guys. Thanks,” Jay smiled at them, putting his hand over yours and caressing you gently.

You arrived at your floor and as you exited the elevator with Jay, your employees waved at you still with concerned looks on their faces. As soon as the elevator door closed, you yanked your hands off Jay’s arm, and he cackled as he followed you back to the office.

You had dismissed Hwiyoung earlier, so you did not have to worry about any employees lingering around your office. You swung the door open and pulled the hair clip off your hair, throwing it haphazardly on your desk. Jay followed you and closed the door behind him before taking the remote out of his pocket.

“Mission accomplished?” Jay asked, dangling the remote in front of your face.

“Shut up.”

You threw your body towards him and he caught you in his arms, also catching your lips in his. The remote dropped from his hand and you continued to move closer to him, making him take several steps backwards until he hit a wall. Your hands were firmly cupping his face so you could dominate the kiss, but his hands were roaming freely all over your body.

“You made me all wet,” you whispered, kissing his cheek. “That wasn’t the goal.”

Jay smiled, pushing your skirt up your thighs and reaching for your panties to detach the device. “But what if it is?” he asked as he got rid of it. “What if the goal is exactly to make you wet?”

“Then you’re gonna have to clean up,” you muttered, pulling him by his tie and switching positions, making him cage you with his arms. “Be a good boy, will you?”

You placed both your hands on his shoulders and started pushing him down to his knees. The moment he realized what was going on, Jay chuckled and ran his hands down your sides as he went down. He even dragged your panties with the hook of his fingers and carefully took them off your feet.

He looked up at you with his gorgeous, gorgeous eyes and you took a deep breath before you witnessed his face disappearing under your skirt. You let out a soft whimper when you felt his plush lips kiss your folds, and it did not take long for him to completely devour you, making your lewd moans escape your lips. His hands were parked on your ass firmly, and you began slowly grinding your hips while you placed the back of your arm against your mouth to conceal the noises you were letting out.

Your other hand snaked down to the back of his head, and you tugged on his hair. Jay moaned into your cunt and kept his pace until he noticed your legs tensing up. The grip on his head became stronger as you reached your high, and he was moaning softly along with you, his voice muffled by your own heat.

Jay lifted his head up to look at you, and he was proud that the look of your fucked out face was the one to greet him. You looked at him and saw that his face was a mess, his drool mixed with your cum stained all over his mouth, so you calmly wiped his lips with your thumb.

“Stand up,” you whispered, licking your lips.

Jay did as you said and you greeted him with the softest kiss, feeling him melt into your touch.

“Do you think we can do that again?” Jay asked, brushing his nose against yours.

“Yes, but not in front of my employees,” you answered.

Jay chuckled and you smiled at him. “Out in public, maybe?”

“Sure,” you replied. “But only if you fuck my brains out afterwards.”

“Deal,” Jay said in a split second. “That’s an even bigger win for me.”

---

You were sitting on an outdoor lounge chair by the porch, legs up and facing the beach that was walking distance from the villa. On the coffee table was your laptop, showing several windows open as well as a pile of documents to its side with your sunglasses case acting as a paperweight. As you were reading a chat from your phone and crosschecking it with a document on your screen, you felt a soft tap on your arm.

“Auntie.”

You turned your head and smiled as soon as you saw Ayun.

“Can you brush my hair?” she asked politely, holding up a hairbrush with one hand.

“Of course, darling,” you replied, setting your phone on the table and patting your thighs. Ayun immediately climbed to sit on your lap.

From inside, Jay was prepping the ingredients for an early dinner, and he could see the porch from the huge window on the side of the kitchen. He paused cutting up the potatoes to watch your interaction with Ayun, and soon after, Seungho entered with a couple of snacks and drinks in his hands.

“In case you need refreshments,” your brother said, setting the snacks on the table and heading over to the fridge to store the drinks. “Whatchu got there?”

“Oh, uhm,” Jay stuttered at the sudden appearance of your brother. “Just Japanese-style curry, if that’s okay?”

Seungho chuckled. “What do you mean ‘if that’s okay’? You’re the chef here, we’re definitely just gonna eat what you make. Oh, by the way, Byunghee can’t handle spice.”

“Noted,” Jay replied. “I’ll have the chili flakes separated and served on the table later.”

“Awesome.” Seungho smiled and took a few steps closer to where Jay was standing. “Are you sure there’s nothing I can help you with? I mean, I did hear from my sister that you’re very much a lone chef…”

Jay nodded. “And she is right. I’ve got it covered. Thank you, though. And thanks for inviting us to stay for the weekend.”

Seungho smiled and waved his hand. “It’s nothing. I really wanted to spend more time with family, and I figured the only way to make my sister come down here to Jeju is to forcefully book her tickets and let her stay in this beach house—oh, my God that is adorable!”

Jay blinked and quickly joined Seungho looking out the window. You were holding up your phone, having it on selfie mode, while letting Ayun sing whatever song she was trying to belt out. Ayun was giggling because of the cat filter you had put on.

“For someone who says she doesn’t like children, she really is good with them,” Seungho said, sounding a little solemn.

“She is,” Jay responded, almost a whisper. He then cleared his voice and continued with the meal prep.

“I’m actually glad that we decided to adopt Ayun. I don’t know if my sister had told you, but initially we wanted to be child-free. Some time along the way I think our views both changed.”

Jay had to stop chopping a carrot to gather his thoughts and process Seungho’s words. “I think you both made a great decision. Ayun seems to be happy having two great dads.”

Seungho chuckled softly and smiled to himself. “Thanks for saying that. I’ll get out of your hair now.”

Just as Seungho reached the doorway, Byunghee appeared.

“Go get our daughter and play with her for a bit. I wanna talk to my sister,” Seungho said, placing a hand on Byunghee’s shoulder.

---

You were drying your hair in the bathroom when Jay entered after knocking on the door softly. He gave you the warmest smile and you noticed the hint of fatigue on his face.

“Ayun doesn’t seem to get tired easily, does she?” you asked knowingly.

Jay pouted and nodded, and his adorable expression made you laugh. He stood next to you, and you made room for him, scooting to the side so he could use the sink.

“I had a long talk with Seungho earlier,” you said as you watched him reach for the toothpaste. “He seems to be very proud of Ayun and is having a blast raising her with Byunghee.”

“I can see that,” Jay replied, his voice muffled by the toothbrush in his mouth. “And Ayun is such a nice little girl. I’m sure they’re doing something right.”

You nodded and fell silent as you put away the dryer and began organizing the skincare by the sink. Jay noticed your unusual behavior and quickly wrapped up brushing his teeth.

“Penny for your thoughts?” he said after rinsing his mouth one last time.

You tilted your head and hesitated for a second. “I know that we haven’t really talked about it before we got married, and that’s on me, but what are your thoughts about having children?”

Jay smiled at you softly and turned to face you. He began rubbing both your shoulders with his hands. “Is this what you talked about with your brother?”

“Answer the question, Jay.”

“Alright, Boss,” Jay chuckled, leaning in to peck your cheek. “It’s your body. If you want children, then I will be happy to have them with you. If you don’t, I respect that.”

“Are you being honest?” you retorted, furrowing your eyebrows.

“When have I ever lied to you, Y/N?”

You were about to list all the excuses he had given you before, but you realized all of it was to keep the proposal a surprise. Every little white lie he told you was a cover up that led to him proposing to you, so you couldn’t really count those.

“Really? Playing with Ayun all day didn’t make you feel some sort of spark?” you asked again, this time crossing your elbows in front of your chest.

“How about you?” Jay asked back. “You spent a lot of time with her today. Did it awaken something in you?”

“You always ask me back my questions without answering,” you pouted, shoving his hands away and turning away from him.

Jay smiled and looked at you through the reflection in the mirror. “If I don’t Uno-reverse you, how will I ever know what you really think? I can’t read minds, my love.”

You pouted even more and began leaning into Jay, throwing all your body weight on him. He responded by circling his arms around your waist, pulling you into a hug. You continued to look at each other through the reflection.

“I don’t like kids in general, but maybe I’d like them if they were ours?” you asked, unsure.

“If we had a mini-me and mini-you that would literally be the most adorable thing,” Jay agreed. “But again, it’s your body. I know the thought of pregnancy isn’t that dreamy to you, so we can consider adopting if you really want us to raise a child? We can follow in your brother’s footsteps.”

Hearing Jay’s suggestion, a smile creeped up on your face. You closed your eyes and tightened your arms around his body, nuzzling your face to his neck.

“I married the right man,” you mumbled, taking in his scent.

Jay smiled and moved his head to kiss your temple. “Aren’t you glad?”

You pinched Jay’s waist as a response to his remark and he winced before letting out a hearty laugh. Your nose brushed against his chin as you attempted to kiss his jawline.

“So, ultimately I get to decide because it’s my body, right?”

Jay hummed as he squeezed you tighter, trailing his hands down from your hips to your ass.

“There’s a part of me that’s yours too, though,” you whispered, resting your head on his shoulder and looking at him through his reflection again.

“Your heart?” Jay replied.

You let out a breathy chuckle as you shook your head. “God, you’re such a romantic.”

Confused, Jay pulled away from you to look you in the eyes. You grabbed his hand from behind your waist and guided his palm to touch you between your legs.

“Oooh,” Jay reacted, nodding his head. “I get it now.”

“Idiot,” you muttered, pulling his face in for a deep kiss.

Jay kissed you passionately, pressing his body onto yours until you had to arch your back, feeling his hands squeezing your ass. You held his face firmly, moving your lips in sync with his and letting your tongues dance together. He bit your lower lip gently and you chuckled softly.

“Minty,” you commented.

Jay smiled and pecked your cheek three times. “Better than morning breath, right?”

You grinned and shook your head as you took his hand in yours and led him to the bed. You sat down on the edge, and he watched as you began to undress, leaving nothing on your body. You then wondered why he was just standing there doing nothing.

“Baby?” you called. “What’s wrong?”

Jay shook his head, never taking his eyes off your body. “You’re just so beautiful.”

You scoffed. “You’ve seen me naked a million times…”

“Take the compliment, Y/N.”

The tone in the way he said your name made you visibly blush. You brought your hands up to cover your mouth because you did not want to let Jay see your stupid grin.

“And you’re a professional panty-dropper, Jay, so please just get naked with me.”

Jay laughed at your ridiculous remark, and you laughed with him, waiting patiently until he got rid of all his clothes. When he was finally naked, he lifted you up by your waist and you shrieked as he moved you to the center of the bed.

“Sssh!” Jay said in a hurry, bringing one hand to cover your mouth. “I think your brother is still awake.”

“Jay, we’re adults, they are adults, they know what we’re doing anyway.”

“Yeah,” Jay replied, his hand moving to caress your face. “But if I had a sister, I wouldn’t love it if I could hear her getting railed.”

You groaned in disgust and Jay just laughed, burying his face in the crook of your neck. “Are we doing this or what?” you complained, lightly slapping his arm.

“Be quiet for me, okay?” Jay said as he began rubbing your waist.

“I thought you liked to hear me moan,” you complained, pouting.

Jay let out a moan of frustration and you chuckled before he silenced you by shutting your mouth with his. You both smiled into the kiss before you felt his hand squeezing your ass and moving down to spread your legs. The soft chuckles you let out turned into whimpers, and your body twitched whenever Jay put pressure on your folds with his fingers.

“Jay,” you called out breathlessly after minutes of him playing with your cunt. “I want you.”

He kissed your cheek and let his lips linger there for a moment before he whispered in your ear. “I know.”

Jay coated his fingers with your arousal and spread it all over his shaft. You licked your lips in anticipation as he aligned himself with you, and you took a deep breath as you felt him enter you. Your mouth hung open and your eyes closed, and as Jay began thrusting in and out of you, he intertwined his fingers with yours, placing your hand above your head.

He knew what he had to do to make you moan, he knew all the right buttons to push, so out of courtesy, tonight he took it agonizingly slow. Every deep and slow thrust he made only made your breath hitch, and the loudest sound you let out was a whimper. You felt his hand grab your thigh and you instantly wrapped your legs around his waist.

His chest was pressed onto yours, and the heat of his body was enveloping you and beginning to cloud your senses. You could feel his cock twitch inside of you whenever you clenched harder, and you were delighted to hear his soft little grunts by your ear when it happened. His arms flexed as he continued to hover on top of you, and you started to caress his shoulders to soothe him.

“I’m close, baby,” you whispered, grasping his shoulders.

“Cum for me first, love,” he replied, brushing your hair back.

Jay leaned into you and began sucking on your neck softly, knowing just the right thing to make you reach your high faster. He noticed your body tensing and he sucked harder, deciding not to worry about the mark that would be left on your skin. As you climaxed, you whined near his ear and he calmly shushed you, kissing your cheek.

“I love you,” he mumbled, lips brushing yours. “So much.”

You felt him release his seed inside of you and you hooked your feet together, pushing his body even closer to yours. His hips rutted and he groaned softly into your ear, so you brought your hands up and entangled your fingers in his hair. Jay licked his lips before he pushed himself up to get a look at your face.

“I love you,” you mouthed, smiling when he leaned in to kiss your lips.

Jay smiled and carefully pulled out of you. When he moved to the side, he placed one hand over your core, and as he felt his cum dripping out of you, he slid a finger over it and stuffed it back into your cunt. You almost hissed at the feeling, grabbing onto his shoulder again.

“Wouldn’t want to waste a single drop,” Jay whispered, kissing your chin. “Also, I don’t want to dirty these expensive looking sheets.”

You laughed but it came out as a snort, and Jay found it hilarious that his body began to shake with the silent laugh that he let out.

“Not too loud!” Jay half-whispered, half-shouted.

“At this point my brother is going to think we’re just watching Netflix in bed,” you whispered back.

“That might seem like a better option,” Jay replied, bringing his hand back to your waist and squeezing it softly. “Do you need another shower?”

You shook your head. “I kind of like the feeling of being sweaty after having sex with you.”

Jay smiled, proudly. “Good. Me too.”

---

The ride to the office was quiet since both you and Jay were busy with your own gadgets. Jay was reviewing a presentation that he had made, while you were checking unread messages on your phone. Your hand stopped scrolling once you read a status from an old friend, and you immediately set your phone gently on your lap and brought one hand to cover your mouth.

“Is something wrong?” Jay asked, noticing the shift in your gestures.

“An old friend from college passed away,” you muttered, moving your hand to massage your temple. “I knew that she was sick, but I haven’t checked on her over a month.”

Jay deemed that the situation was too delicate for him to even comment, so he set his iPad down and grabbed your hand. He held you tightly, intertwining your fingers and caressing your hand with his thumb. Once you adjusted your seat and took a deep breath, he looked at you carefully before he spoke.

“If you wish to visit her family, I can cover for you,” Jay said, looking at the road ahead.

“It’s all the way in Busan,” you replied, already sounding so defeated.

“I’ll book you a flight.” Jay squeezed your hand before letting go. “We’re here. I’ll ask Hwiyoung to sit in for the meeting while I handle the rest of it.”

“I’ll be on standby, Miss,” Mr. Lee chimed in, smiling at you through the rearview mirror.

You sat still in your seat as Jay grabbed his bag and opened the door. Mr. Lee even turned around slightly to look at you both.

“I got this, Y/N.” Jay leaned into you and kissed your cheek. “Mr. Lee, if you don’t mind would you kindly drive her back home so she can pack? I’ll text you the details of the flight later.”

Mr. Lee nodded and waited for Jay to close the door. He then rolled down the window for you and Jay bent over to look at you. You had tears welling up in your eyes and you could only mouth ‘thank you’ to him. He smiled at you and blew you a kiss before standing up straight and turning around.

---

The day went by in a flash. You arrived just in time for your friend’s funeral, and you were glad that you chose to wear all black when you were getting dressed earlier in the morning. After giving your condolences to the family, you had to stick around for a meal and ended up meeting other friends that you met back in college. The brief catch-up was quite pleasant, but you left with a heavy heart.

Jay decided to pick you up from the airport himself, since you insisted on flying back the same night instead of the next morning. You did not have to wait long until your car pulled up, and when you hopped in, Jay leaned over to place a soft kiss on your cheek. He let you both sit in silence, knowing that it wasn’t the right time to be asking you a bunch of questions. At almost every red light, when Jay’s hand was idle, you intertwined your fingers with his and he gave you a reassuring squeeze before the light turned green again.

When you arrived home, Jay quietly took your bag and your jacket and waited for you to walk ahead of him towards the house. He began tidying up a little as he let you unwind and do your own thing, and he turned on the jazz instrumental playlist that you had displayed on the TV. You checked on him once in a while as you took your make up off and undressed to get into the shower, and you saw him cozied up on the sofa with a book. You had no idea that the respectful silence he gave you would make you feel comforted and guilty at the same time.

You still had a towel wrapped around your head as you walked towards him in your new silk pajama set. He looked up from his book, and before he could say anything, you spoke first.

“Namjoon was there.”

You noticed the subtle shift of emotion in his eyes before he straightened his position and made room for you to sit.

“My friend,” you began, “may she rest in peace, was the one who introduced me to him, so it would be weird if he wasn’t there.”

Jay looked at you and found you staring blankly at the coffee table in front of you.

“Everyone else was there too. Some I haven’t seen in years, and they thought that Namjoon and I were still a thing.”

You could hear rustling beside you and you noticed that Jay was quietly putting his book away.

“We talked a lot, all of us. And just the two of us too. It was nothing important…”

You began to realize that Jay had been quiet for longer than usual, and it had never happened before, so you stopped mid-sentence.

“Please say something,” you whispered, almost to yourself.

Without a word, Jay moved closer to you and pulled you into his embrace. You cried, staining his shirt with your tears, and as you were shaking in his arms, he tried his best to console you with his warmth. He rubbed his hands along your arms and your back while he repeatedly whispered ‘it’s okay’ into your ear.

“You’ve had a long day,” he finally said, pulling away from you. “You need to get some rest.”

“You’re not mad?” You asked, eyes still teary yet beaming at him.

“Why would I be?” Jay replied, wiping his thumb along your cheek. “Go to bed, I’ll be with you in a minute.”

You nodded and let Jay help you stand up before you turned and headed towards the bedroom. After getting rid of your towel and sliding underneath the blanket, you realized that Jay was probably going to take some time to wash up, so you decided to go on your phone and backtrack the chats and interactions that you had with your friend.

First, you went to your phone’s gallery, but you could barely find any pictures of the two of you, so you went to your cloud storage to dig for pictures dating back to more than a decade ago. You found screenshots of your chats with her, and you made yourself laugh as you reread the chaotic conversations you used to have. Your weak smile was instantly replaced with faint sobs as you let the thought sink in—that you were never going to have a chat with your friend again.

You almost jumped from the bed when you felt Jay’s arms sneak around your waist. With one hand, he gently took your phone away from you, setting it on the end table. He then pulled you into his arms, caging you completely. You could not muster a word out of your mouth, so you brought one of his hands to your lips and kissed it, leaving a tear-stained mark on the back of his hand.

---

You woke up to complete silence. The sun was already shining brightly, and you did not have to squint since the curtains in your bedroom were left closed. It took you a couple of seconds to register the faint noise in the background, seemingly coming from the kitchen. As you turned to look at Jay’s side of the bed, you found it empty, and you saw a note sitting on top of his pillow.

“Be ready for breakfast once you wake up,” it said.

Smiling to yourself, you shoved your blanket away and went straight to the bathroom to wash up. All you did was brush your teeth and wash your face and put on the quick version of your morning skincare routine. You changed into a new crop tee but left your pajama pants on, thinking that you look pretty enough from your torso and up.

Your slippers made a muffled sound and as you reached the kitchen, Jay turned around to face you. He gave you a big smile before plating the pancakes he just made on a plate for the both of you. You chuckled when you saw your plate with perfectly stacked pancakes and garnish that was obviously carefully put, while Jay’s plate had three stacks of pancakes that almost looked like the leaning tower of Pisa with the fruits haphazardly spread around the edges.

“Perfect timing,” Jay said, wiping his hands with a tea towel before taking his apron off. “Good morning, my love.”

You walked towards the counter but completely ignored the breakfast. Instead, you took a couple more steps to reach your husband and threw yourself into his arms.

“It’s always a good morning if I wake up to the sound of you,” you murmured, lips touching his neck. You could hear him chuckle softly.

“I’ve trained myself to be only slightly noisy if I wake up before you,” Jay replied. “Now let’s dig in.”

You shook your head, bumping it with his shoulder. Jay had to take a step back to look at you with furrowed eyebrows.

“Have I told you lately that I love you?” You asked, tilting your head.

Jay smiled before pecking your lips. “Even if you don’t tell me, I already know.”

You hummed as you let him pepper soft kisses all over your face. “So can I still show you even if I don’t tell you?”

Now it was Jay who was tilting his head. “What do you mean?”

You sighed and shook your head gently. Then you placed a hand to cup Jay’s face and kissed him on the chin. “Take the hint, Jay.”

“Uhm,” Jay gulped. His eyes fluttered shut as he felt your lips trailing wet kisses along his jawline. “Okay.”

You both laughed at his awkward response but then Jay quickly silenced you with his lips. The way he kissed you with force made you arch your back, almost losing balance, but his arm was firmly wrapped around your waist. With every aggressive kiss that landed on your face, he took a step forward until he cornered you to the counter.

“Thank God our kitchen is huge,” Jay whispered, picking you up by your waist and making you sit on the counter.

You giggled and nodded, resting your arms on his shoulders. He stood between your legs and stared at you for a while, eventually making you blush and look away.

“My gorgeous, gorgeous wife,” he said, cupping your face and turning your head to face him again. “How did I get so lucky?”

“I could ask myself the same thing,” you replied. You did not blink as you grazed your lips along his.

When Jay latched his mouth onto yours, your hands immediately slid down his biceps and made their way to his abs, lingering for a second before you slipped one hand into his pants. He gasped slightly against your lips as he felt your fingers wrap around his hardened length.

“Good morning to you, Sir.”

Jay almost snorted at your remark, but he quickly set the mood again by resting the palms of his hands on your ass and squeezing them. You yelped at the gesture and buried your face in his neck to laugh wholeheartedly. Jay managed to find his way back to your lips, kissing you endlessly, passionately, like you were the only thing he needed to breathe in.

Everything else went by so fast but so slow at the same time, you felt. In mere seconds, Jay got rid of his pants and yours too, and the next thing you remember was him thrusting into you at a frustratingly slow pace. You wanted him to go fast, but you also wanted to savor every moment. You wanted him to go hard, but you also wanted to feel every part of your skin light up whenever he touched you, or whenever he twitched inside of you.

Jay kept the slow pace as he rested his forehead against yours. He was breathing through his mouth, and you could feel the air around you turn into his scent. His sweat trickled down his face, and you caressed his cheek and rested your hand there, closing your eyes while you bask in the feeling of being completely enveloped in his warmth.

Your moans were repetitive in his ear, but there was no sound that he wanted to hear more. The way you grabbed on his shirt and bunched the fabric in your fist just made him want to thrust into you more, to be deep inside you even more. He placed a hand on the small of your back, gently pushing you more towards him, and you wrapped your legs around his waist and latched your feet together, locking him in.

“Jay,” you whimpered, slowly losing your breath.

“I got you, baby,” Jay replied, kissing the back of your ear.

You wrapped your arms around his shoulders and felt him rut his hips into yours, and seconds later you felt the warmth of his cum coat your insides. Jay tilted his head to kiss your neck and suck your soft skin a little more intensely, sending you to your own high too.

You both stayed in the same position, panting almost in unison. When you felt him starting to pull away, you placed a hand on his back.

“Stay,” you whispered. “For a bit.”

Jay adjusted his position and placed his palms on the counter, lifting his head to look at you. His smile looked tired, so you gently caressed his face and brushed his hair back.

“Jay,” you began speaking in the softest voice you could muster. You saw his eyes lock with yours. “I need you to know that I’m yours. Heart, body, mind, and soul.”

Your statement was merely met with a blink of his eyes, so you decided to elaborate.

“I know I might not say it as much as you do, but I truly love you. And I might not show it in the same way as you do, and I don’t know why, but I try to, and…”

Your sentence was put to a halt because of your sealed lips. Jay pulled back from your lips with a smack.

“I know,” he said. “Believe me, I do. So don’t you worry.”

You had to fight back tears from streaming down your face again, so you pulled him into another hug. He took in your scent and breathed against your shoulder.

“I’m yours too,” he mumbled. “Completely.”

---

The next months, you swore, went by in the blink of an eye. The last quarter of the year was always the busiest period for almost any company, and it included yours. You were having back-to-back meetings, flights to cities you had never been before, and you also had to supervise a new group of interns that your staff had hired.

Jay was surely the most valuable person through it all. He always made sure you were taken care of, both at the office and at home. He also kept a close monitor of his own health, claiming that he could not take care of you if he was not in his best condition. He would forget small things occasionally, but you never gave him hell for it.

You found yourself more accommodating as well, saying yes to almost everything he suggests related to your best interest. You had been having fewer arguments, but more comfortable silences. All in all, the hustle and bustle of your daily lives somehow made your relationship even better.

Until that one fateful day, where you had to attend an important meeting that clashed with another scheduled meeting in your office. After a slight panic in rearranging things, you decided to delegate Jay to the meeting outside so you can handle the one in your building. Luckily, Yeji was right by your side to take over Jay’s usual position.

You were feeling off from the minute you woke up, but you tried your best to hide it because it was an important day. Jay had even more things to worry about too, so he wasn’t exactly as attentive as other days. In fact, you managed to breathe a sigh of relief the moment he told you he was leaving for the meeting.

The sharp stabbing feeling on top of your left eye did not wear off as you tried your best to focus on the presentation. Yeji glanced at you whenever you brought a hand to touch your forehead, and eventually you did it so many times that she just had to ask.

“Are you alright, Miss?” She leaned into you, trying to keep her voice low.

You nodded gently. “I think I need to use the restroom.”

The large meeting room was on the floor above your office, so it would take too long if you used your private bathroom. You turned your heels towards the women’s restroom, gently letting the door go and close behind you.

It took a while for Yeji to notice that you were taking a bit too long. She only noticed after the other attendees started getting restless because they expected to hear direct feedback from you. Yeji then quickly stood up and excused herself to go fetch you from the bathroom.

“Miss?” She called, pushing the door open.

You had your head down facing the sink, and your hands were grasping the edge of the counter so hard that your knuckles were turning white.

“Miss?” Yeji started to sound worried. “Miss, are you—”

Your hand slipped and you almost hit your head on the floor as you slowly slumped, but you could hear Yeji’s breath hitch as she desperately tried to reach you before you could hurt yourself.

“Miss!”

You were losing your vision, but you felt your head resting on Yeji’s lap. You heard Yeji saying that your lips were so pale and your hands were cold as ice. In the midst of her panic, and feeling her body rustle under you as she reached for her phone in her pocket, you could feel your consciousness slipping away.

“Park, please,” Yeji said into the phone, almost breaking into a sob. “She’s about to faint.”

You could hear Jay’s faint sound through the phone, asking about your location, and the next thing you knew everything was black for a short moment. When you opened your eyes again, Yeji’s lap was replaced by Jay’s, and before you could register anything else, you threw up all over his chest.

“It’s okay,” Jay muttered despite being worried sick himself. “I’m here, just let it out.”

You blinked several times and saw Yeji holding her phone and furiously typing on it as she stood by the entrance, also holding the restroom door open with her body. You looked up at Jay and you had never seen the type of expression he was wearing on his face.

He brought up one hand to your face to wipe the vomit off your chin, but he was clearly trembling. “Yeji,” he said before clearing his throat. “Medic?”

“On their way,” Yeji replied in an instant. “Should I—”

“I’ll carry her down,” Jay said, carelessly wiping his shirt with a paper towel that Yeji gave him.

“I’ll come with you,” she said after she was done typing on her phone.

Jay was now rushing, seeing that you had closed your eyes again. “Stay back and notify the people at the meeting,” he said, grunting as he picked you up in his arms. “In both meetings, actually. I had to leave mine too. I’ll meet you in the hospital.”

Yeji nodded and held the door open as wide as possible to let Jay pass with you in his arms.

---

The consistent sound of the repetitive beep on your left was what made you wake up. You blinked and looked to your side, only to find Yeji’s eyes widening as she slowly stood up.

“Miss,” she said softly. “Stay here, I’ll go get a doctor and find Park, okay?”

You gave her a faint smile and then chuckled to yourself. It wasn’t like you could move anyway. You had an IV drip inserted into your hand and your body still felt heavy. You stared at the ceiling for a while and then noticed that the walls were painted a nice shade of ivory, and a moment later you heard the sound of footsteps rushing towards the door.

Jay entered first, locking eyes with you instantly as he made his way to your side. He took your free hand and made you cup his face. He still looked worried, and you couldn’t tell if the sparkle in his eyes were tears that he was holding back or the reflection of the lights.

You were so focused on Jay that you didn’t notice the doctor speaking to Yeji on the other side of the bed. Their muffled voices slowly became clearer to you, and you were able to make out the last part of her sentence.

“…at least until the baby comes,” you heard her say, clutching the stethoscope around her neck.

You turned to look at Yeji’s direction and you felt Jay’s hand squeeze yours gently. “What?” You asked, the only word you managed to let out.

Yeji covered her wide smile with both her hands and looked at both you and Jay. There was a brief exchange of glances before Yeji and the doctor excused themselves, leaving you and Jay alone.

“You knew?” You asked Jay, watching him get comfortable as he leaned on the bed closer to you.

“I did have a short conversation with the doctor before you woke up. Before that, I didn’t. I’m sorry I didn’t notice the signs, my love.”

Your eyebrows began to furrow, and the grip you had on Jay’s hand began to loosen. Jay quickly reached for your hand with both of his, stroking the back of your hand with his thumb.

“It’ll be okay,” Jay said. “We’ve got this.”

“It’s not what we planned,” you croaked. You could already feel the tears welling up again. In all honesty, you were not sure how to feel.

“We can adapt,” Jay replied. “It’s what we do best.”

You watched as Jay lifted your hand and gently brought it to his lips, kissing your hand and lingering for a while as he closed his eyes. You felt his breath on your skin, the warmth of his hands, and as he opened his eyes you knew he was happy, and that was why his eyes sparkled.

Trying your best, you reached out both arms towards him and he immediately scooted closer, helping you sit up to properly embrace you. You sobbed softly as you rested your head on his shoulder, and he calmly rubbed your back and your sides as he showered you with words of affirmation.

Once he was certain you had calmed down, he pulled away and kept his hands on your shoulders.

“Alright, love?” He asked, bringing his hand to your chin to tilt it up.

“Your shirt smells like vomit,” you replied weakly before turning your frown into a smile.

Jay chuckled silently and moved closer to leave a kiss on your forehead, and in that instant, you felt a thousand times better.

-END-

SECRETARY!JAY will return…

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