#gonna mix some colors from the tolerate it

[stinkypeanutbutter]

silly Aiden headcanons because I have no impulse

i probably already done these before in other headcanon posts I made but ermm I’ll do it again 😹

small TW for scars at the end 🗣🗣

AIDEN :

Aiden has the most unhinged playlist ever like oh my giggly goodness we got metal we got rock we got classic we got indie we got pop we got vocaloid Idfk whatever you can think of ( same 😹 )

totally had an immense phase of just everything . Creepy pasta , animation , FNAF , idk any other phases from 2016 help

Probably dated like once or twice , but they weren’t serious at ALL and mostly online . He just said yes because he wanted to be nice since he never really had friends ofc , so why hurt someone you barley know if it means getting a friend ? ( I’m gonna explode 😭 )

I’m not sure when this was actually invented , but he’d probably try and convince everyone to make battery acid candy drinks . ( they all say no 😔 )

Sorta sad headcanon they if no matter how hard to tries to solve a difficult puzzle , and he fails , he just starts silently bawling his eyes out . Cause you know he’s really good at them right ? He can solve them pretty quickly ? So if he’s like absolutely pressured by a bunch of people watching expecting him to win ( or like his friends cause yk they believe in him !!!! ) and he can’t solve the puzzle he’ll be like “ why can’t I solve this why is this hard why am I failing “ or something and then start crying ig ( Yeouchers angst 😿 )

Bro is the heaviest napper ever you can stack things on him for HOURS but the moment he actually sleeps most things can wake him ( if he’s not comfortable at least . He’ll sleep pretty well at sleepovers )

I can’t figure out an art style for him but I updated it so ignore that last drawing it’s grody anyway he sometimes draws people but prefers just random splotches of color . He has extremely stylized art but yk , it’s just ‘ weird ’ according to some people since it’s really . . graphic . Not in a BLOOD BLOOD BLOOD way but very mixed ( if you get what I mean )

Hugs everything when he sleeps you can’t tell me otherwise like you seen his old bed ?? He had NOTHIN so absolutely is he gonna cuddle everything near him

Hates competing . ( idk if he did it before but we’ll see ) like he doesn’t like doing puzzle competitions anymore that much , he just got bored of it and was really kinda forced to do it when he was younger . BUT if it’s in a game against his friends , he’ll probably do it just to help them out cause they always get stuck if Logan can’t figure it out either .

Does that thing with music where If it absolutely hits he just starts spazzing out and dances to it

that one thing where he walks around in a circle talking to himself if he’s really deep in thought ( he could go on for hours so someone has to pull him out to drink water at least )

TONS of posters in his room

Him and Taylor binge shows together , often ask the others to join when they aren’t busy . They totally watch anime ( Tyler calls it childish then gets really invested in uhhhh let’s say full metal alchemist and sport animes like haikyuu or something I can’t think of any he’d like . But I’m gonna make them all watch Ghost stories because it’s funny )

Aidlyn cuddling is mostly done at Aidens house cause his parents rarely go up to check on him ( 😅💥 ) and also he had a ton of blankets for Ashlyn to wrap herself in . He got her a heavy weighted blanket for her birthday one time so when that’s not around she just uses Aiden as a blanket if she’s feeling affectionate ( he’s warm in the winter time and pretty light believe it or not )

Has a medium spice tolerance , eats more then what he can handle like a stinky loser

doesn’t like anyone pointing out his growing hair roots so just don’t talk about it much 😅😅

steals chopsticks from restaurants cause who needs to buy any ??? They’re free if you don’t get caught / hj

sometimes just locks himself up in his room and lays in his bed thinking about life

LOVES drawing his friends ( especially Ash ) in his free time because he rarely draws in front of people , and will make an airplane out of it to throw it over to them . But he has that mentality where “ Everyrhing I make kinda sucks “ so expect to find doodles in the trash or hidden in his room

IPad kid , can’t tel me otherwise .

Loves hover boarding but he kinda sucks at it so he just 🧍🕺☠️ ( falls )

Will ram into everyone in bumper cars , almost sent someone flying ( Lilly , he bought her candy as a sorry )

rarely catches cavities because he actually has really strong teeth and willingly bites down on hard candies ( I do the same thing because I’m impatient 😹 )

Does all his school work at home cause school has too many distractions ( real )

Buys like body foundation to smear onto his legs and arms . He doesn’t want anyone to point out them out , and if they do he just tells them their from skateboarding . It can come off after a few days if he doesn’t reapply , but it’s fine since he does it again in between and would have to reapply anyway . Idk how it works 😿

Anyway who shall I do next ????? Put your answers in the comment section below subscribe like and support my Patreon see you in the next video 😹😹😹☝️☝️💥💥

#school bus graveyard #sbg #sbg (webtoon) #school bus graveyard webtoon #I’m so mean #I got to stop I’m going insane #He has one of those ugly - cute stuffed animals with the fake teeth #aiden clark #aiden rambles #Will update tags later maybe

[ringringimdeadhere]

Okey I'm gonna give my side of the discourse, mainly because I've been thinking about it a lot

This all started because of a cultural shock, and also because of misinformation and just straight up harrasment

I am latino, so I will be biased. Here in latinoamerica the N word does not hold the same weight as it does everywhere else, and most of us where introduced to the word via music and general US rap culture. I at least thought it was closer to the Weon equivalent when I was little, from before I even learned to speak english. Now I know that it might be closer to the "Sudaca" slur (which even then, is a regional slur, not a racial one)

And besides, Roier and Cellbit where minors when all this happened (literally Roier is only 2 years older than me). And as someone who lived around that era on latino internet, shit was wild. It was not a safe space for developing minds that do not understand the weight of racism (especially if you are lightskinned, my god, idk how my mulato friends tolerated me, I was a demon and I got away with everything while they got scorted by security for doing the same thing)

But once again, our racial biases and cultures are different from the US. So once this two mixed, it was obvious it wasn't gonna be all smooth sailing. Especially because our humor tends to be a lot more.. self degrading, like we make fun of our culture all the time. So no matter your skin color, you are used to make and being made fun of for it. I had a friend we called el gringo because he looked so white, la chochos (the curly haired one) because of her afro hair; calling someone "negra/negro" is a friendly nickname for your black friends (only in spanish please dont try this anywhere else-); and my nickname was morocha (yes even though I am still very lightskinned). It's not great, but it is normalized.

And blackface is horrible, that's just fucked up. But ignoring the fact that this happened when Cellbit was a 15 y/o is just denying someone the opportunity to grow up and better themselfs. And also, I find it very weird that all this critique is mainly against the latinoamerican streamers when many white creators have done horrible things in their youth also, yet I have not seen the same amount of criticism. Like have you seen the Smosh videos from the same era? A hella lot of sexism, transphobia and ableism is in there. But they are also allowed to grow and change, and they have better themselfs as people. One of the best things you can do when growing up in a bigoted space is to learn from your mistakes and prejudice.

WITH ALL OF THIS SAID OH MY GOD STOP HARRASING BLACK PEOPLE FOR THEIR GENUINE CONCERN ABOUT GIVING BIGOTED CREATORS A PLATAFORM. THEY ALSO DONT HAVE ALL OF THIS BACKGROUND WITH THE LATINO COMMUNITY AND GOT JUMPSCARED WITH A 15 Y/O BLACKFACE CELLBIT AND BITS OF ROIER SAYING THE N WORD NONCHALANTLY, OF COURSE THEY ARE GONNA BE CONCERNED

I have been in the same position, having seeing all of this 2015-2017 racist ass humor about latinos on many of the content creators I just got around watching. They are allowed to be uncomfortable and even worried about the kind of people they admire. So PLEASE, be patient, and be aware that when you try to justify racist actions of a creator via "oh gringo black people are so sensitive about latino dark humor" that speaks more about you than about the creator.

I genuinely believe that Roier and Cellbit are not bad people and that they grew out of those bigoted mentalities (lord knows I had to grew out of some disgusting eras of myself). But I will not blame NOR ATTACK black people for fearing the type of content creators that are given the opportunity to be this influential.

#qsmp #qsmp discourse #roier #cellbit #qsmp twitter #twt

[trashiest-person]

people I'd love to know better (???)

uhh i have never done any of these kinda posts ever in my 5 years of tumblr-ing but i got tagged by @thedemises so ig im gonna do this

last song: CLOSET by Yoh kamiyama

this is actually kinda a lie cuz the last song i actually listened to was smth from one of those daily mixes on spotify

BUT is it the last some i added to the playlist of songs i like so it counts??? i guess???? pretty nice song go listen to it 👍🤠👍

also go listen to will wood and tv room (bro has 7.5k followers on Spotify PLEASE + also he made Say It Back if u ever saw it on yt)

fav color: purple, red (except not really)

i used to really like purble but tbh i don't really know what i like anymore

a big chunk my fav characters have red so i like it by association lol (+ red eyes go hard)

last movie: across the spider-verse

decided to go watch it w/ my kid cousins once and now i need to see unspeakable things happen to Spot. i will not elaborate.

sweet or spicy or savoury?

sweet & savoury

tbh all of them r good but my spice tolerance aint strong enough to devour spicy dried squid like id want to :(

relationship status: single and not lookin for anybody (+demiromanic)

id like to get a lover or lovers (i kinda wanna be in poly) at some point but not yet (not sure if i'll ever manage to :/)

last thing i googled: "portal characters"

so context: i suddenly thought of a oc idea and i wanted them to be trans and that they named xemself after a portal character n yeah

meet Wheatley lol (i know nothing abt Portal btw)

(good lorde my style is inconsistent as hell)

(note @ringdabel they're in that prev wb we did if u wanna see thems)

hohhh boy here we go

current obsession: BOOTHILL 🤠👢🪦‼️‼️

bros highkey actin as my will to live rn...AND he got dripped 1 day RIGHT BEFORE MY BIRTHDAY. I LOVE HIM. 250 passes + 40 pity he WILL COME HOME

im fucking insane for this guy

so yeah datz itz i think thankz mori (i think thats ur name???????? i cant remember names)

[jaysficarchive]

Villain's Wife Support Group

Chapter 1: Initiation

Synopsis: The wives of some of the most infamous villains in the world meet every Wednesday to share stories, give updates, and talk about love on the wrong side of the law.

Relationship(s): Various

Warning(s): Mention of SA, mention of child murder

Tag list: @floof-ghostie @calciumcryptid @mayameanderings

"Hello, ladies, and thank you all for coming."

A group of women exchanged "Hello"s either taking or adjusting their seats. Most of them were older, a few young faces in the crowd. One could tell a bit of their personalities just from looking at the choices in decor.

People from all different parts of the country gathered in front of their computers for one purpose: a common type of spouse.

"Welcome, everyone," a small, round woman with dark brown skin and short black hair spoke. Dressed in a silky robe lined with fur, it was easily to tell she was relaxing after a long day at work. "My name is Christine. I'm the founder of this group."

Some of the others waved at her while others said hellos. The positive reception pleased Christine.

"This is initiation day where we basically introduce ourselves, talk about what we do for a living, maybe a little bit about ourselves then introduce costumed criminal we're married to."

A simple enough task. These people were just getting to know each other, after all. Making a good first impression was highly encouraged to most, critical to some.

"I'll go first. My name is Christine Chapel. I work as a cabaret performer under the name Belle Holiday, my favorite gemstones are amethysts and pearls, and my husband is the Music Meister."

Another woman with copper brown skin and the same jet black hair spoke next. "I'm Brandice Bivolo. I'm an elementary school teacher and my husband is the Rainbow Raider. A few of my hobbies are metalworking, playing instruments, and calligraphy."

Both her style and the background behind her could easily be described as bohemian, hipster. With all the crystal necklaces and bright, earthy colors of her clothes, it wasn't hard to see why someone like him fell for her.

The other members took turns introducing themselves. A notable face was Marina Lulit, a prominent Floridian socialite and wife of one K'an of Tenochtitlan. If what she said about him being the ruler of an underwater kingdom was true, she probably had lots of stories to tell.

Eve, an older Black woman from the Deep South, was the wife of Hollow, phantom of the railroads. Christine was a big fan of the ostrich feather lamp behind her; and of the overall vibes of her room in general. She must've had some truly wild stories--probably even moreso than her own with Music Meister.

Who could forget the ever gracious Mona Lisa Beauvais. It was for the better she be in this group since her fiance Riddler was still in Arkham. Her room was another's Christine admired--with its mix of old Hollywood and urban aesthetics.

Christine clapped her hands together. "Now that that's done, I'm gonna cut to the chase. This is a support group for all women and femmes who are either married or engaged to villains."

"Let's go over a few ground rules. First, when I say all women and femmes, I mean it. I will not tolerate any bullshit. Second, no child murderers or rapists. Made that very clear in the rules on Facebook. Lastly, be respectful about each other's tastes. We already deal with enough shaming from the media."

The other members nodded along in agreement, some even mumbling their support of Christine's ground rules.

"Anymore questions?" Christine looked around.

"When do we meet?" Brandice asked.

"We meet every Wednesday," Christine replied. "Make sure to let me know if you can't make it to a meeting ahead of time."

"What are we gonna do in this group?" Marina asked. "I mean, I know this ain't a club but we gotta do something fun every once in a while."

She's right, Christine said to herself. No one would want to spend the whole time moping and telling stories. "I do plan on having some events including a girls trip. Nothing concrete yet, of course."

After a few more questions and another run down of things, the members all exchanged goodbyes before going their separate ways.

Alone, Christine gently closed the computer. It was just her in a large, luxurious house. Sighing, she headed to the kitchen for a drink. Usually the house would be filled with the sounds of Music Meister playing his piano or singing to his favorite songs. Christine would join in, maybe even dance along to his voice.

Today, only silence. Just a few hours ago, Christine went through the worst moment of her life since the car accident--the trial of her husband. It wasn't being alone that distressed her; rather the amount of attention she got. In the span of a few hours, she went from a private citizen to having cameras and microphones in her face as she left the Gotham City Courthouse.

Heaven knows what they'd say about her and her relationship. All the wrongful insinuations, false narratives, invasive questions.

These were about to be the longest three years ever.

#fic: villain's wife support group

[peaches2217]

🥶

🥶 Cold

Sunlight

~~~

Winter was slow in the Beanbean Kingdom.

Perhaps it shouldn’t have surprised Luigi. The Beanish people were some strange mix of mammalian and plant matter, meaning their body temperature, already low by human standards, fluctuated with the changing of seasons. Sunlight was something they not only thrived in, but required to remain fully functional.

Everything from ramshackle huts to the Grand Palace itself were structured to let in as much of it as possible for as many hours as possible, and nights were almost surreal in their hush once that sunlight was gone. Their peak festival and harvest seasons lay between late spring and early autumn, and even when the air was frigid, they would drag themselves outside bundled in fifteen layers of sweaters and scarves just to feel the sun on their faces.

And when the sun wasn’t out in the dead of winter, well, nothing got done at all.

Yes, the more he thought about it, the less surprising the slow winters were. What did surprise him was how deeply he enjoyed the tedium anyway.

“Regale me again with tales of your winter holidays,” Peasley moped. He bustled about the castle without pause, tending to the innumerable flowers that brought color and oxygen into its bleak halls with hands that shook constantly. All morning he had paced as he read through papers and notes that needed his attention, and when he was forced to stop and provide a signature or write down his thoughts, he’d bounced on his toes like an impatient toddler until he could move once more. His duties complete, he now did everything in his power to create work for himself, all in the hopes of staying just a bit warmer.

This was routine, Luigi had quickly learned. The crown prince didn’t have the luxury of waiting out the winter in one comfortable, secure spot. He yearned to be a successor in his mother’s image, productive and proactive in all areas of life, and that meant he couldn’t shoulder his responsibilities off to her or Lady Lima, and he certainly couldn’t leave them for more tolerable weather.

He was very proud of his own resolve, never passing up an opportunity to brag about how humble and selfless a leader he was… until the first day winter’s chill became strong enough to reach their bed. “Save me, my love,” he’d groaned into Luigi’s chest, and Luigi had promised with a soft laugh that he’d do his best.

“Which holiday do you wanna hear about?” he asked, following on his husband’s heels. It was good exercise, he had to admit, chasing him around all day. Not too exhaustive or overstimulating. Just enough to keep the blood flowing and the joints moving.

Peasley’s trembling hands knocked over a vase on an extensive table. It clunked harmlessly onto its side. “The one where your mother forced a great bird into the oven,” he requested as he realigned the vase. Luigi snickered. Mundane traditions always sounded so much more exciting when Peasley rephrased them.

“Well!” he started. And just for theatrics’ sake, he clapped his hands together and waited a breath or two before continuing. “When we were in the fifth grade, Mario and I decided we were gonna surprise our mom by making Thanksgiving dinner all by ourselves. Bird and everything.”

He must have babbled on about all of them a thousand times, those small but noisy and vibrant Thanksgivings and Christmases and New Years in a little apartment in Brooklyn. He knew for a fact he’d told this story at least twice. Yet the tension and discomfort melted from Peasley’s face as he recounted the disaster that was two ten-year-olds trying to cook a whole turkey; he grinned and gasped and laughed so hard that he wiped tears from his eyes, as though he were hearing it all again for the first time.

When he wasn’t fiddling with the flowers, Peasley’s hand found Luigi’s and squeezed tightly. His skin was cool to the touch even during the hottest summer days. In the winter, it was almost enough to sap all of Luigi’s body heat. But he gave what he had anyway, and sometimes it was enough to allow Peasley a break from his busybodying. In those moments, he would relax his hold and press their sides together briefly, and then he was on the move once more.

And this was how Luigi spent his first winter in the Beanbean Kingdom: following his husband, entertaining him, and keeping him warm, every single day. Perhaps it sounded dull or even overwhelmingly repetitious. To Luigi, it was heaven. 

He wasn’t sure how much it actually helped, but it saw Peasley through until they could retire to their quarters and take more drastic measures to stay warm, and he took pleasure in that.

That night, those drastic measures involved curling up on the couch with three fluffy blankets, two giant mugs of hot cocoa, and Season 13 of DegrasSoy on DVD. Peasley’s small but well-built frame fit so perfectly in Luigi’s arms. Holding him near as his shivering subsided felt as natural as growing facial hair, as natural as breathing itself.

Four episodes in, Peasley broke the amiable silence in their dark room.

“I don’t know if I’ve thanked you.” His normally boisterous voice softened, a tenderness only Luigi got to hear from him. “For keeping me warm.”

Luigi chuckled at that, pulling him in even closer. Peasley was in his lap now, both having abandoned their empty mugs two episodes earlier to twine their arms around one another. Come to think of it, had he even been watching? His head was turned in the direction of the TV, but he hadn’t seemed as invested as he usually was in trashy daytime television. 

“You thank me every night, mio caro,” Luigi reminded him. Peasley, already a classic romantic, became extra sentimental when he was comfortable and tired. It never got old.

“No, I mean… during the day.” In the light cast from the TV, he watched Peasley close his eyes and smile. “I don’t know how I ever survived a winter without you.”

“Oh, come on. All I do is talk and hold your hand!”

“No, no, it’s so much more than that.” Once more Peasley opened his eyes, and this time he fixed them on Luigi; they were heavy not with sleep, but with love, so much love that Luigi felt a bit dizzy. 

“Your voice alone is a driving force,” he continued. “It reminds me that this winter will come to an end, just like every other winter before it. Before you, it always felt… endless. But you, my dear — you’re sunlight in living flesh. And I would live through a hundred consecutive winters without complaint so long as I could spend each of them with you.”

A lump formed in Luigi’s throat. Oh, the things he could promise this man — he had little to his name outside of these castle walls, but it was all his, always, and always would be.

“On second thought—” Peasley drew away suddenly, pursing his lips in thought, and suddenly that air of amorous devotion popped like a flimsy soap bubble. “No, I would absolutely complain. Constantly and fervently. That’s too much suffering to go through in silence. But!” And then he drew back in, grinning at the startled laughter his sudden shift in demeanor had evoked from Luigi. “I would endure it still, knowing my hero would be there to keep me warm.”

“You’re so dramatic,” Luigi snorted. He wanted to kiss him until neither of them could breathe.

“Darling, do you underestimate me?” Peasley gasped. “I can be so much more dramatic.”

“Yeah?”

“Oh, Luigi!” Luigi’s laughter renewed as Peasley sprawled out in his lap, pressing the back of his hand to his forehead in a mock-faint. “I’m so terribly cold, Luigi! I beg of you, relieve me of this torture!”

A hiccup escaped Luigi’s throat, and he took a moment to gasp for air before diving in. “Oh, no!” he cried, twisting himself so that they could face one another without falling off of the couch. “Don’t worry, I’ll save you!”

Peasley joined in on his mirth as Luigi scooped him close, as close as they could physically be. “Oh, my hero,” he called out, pulling at all three of their blankets until they were completely enveloped in soft fabric, “my hero!”

Their show continued until it reached the looping main screen once more, but they were too preoccupied to pay it any mind.

#I was WAY overdue for another Luisley piece #honestly I think Peasley's my favorite character to write for in the series #he's so dramatic! so verbose! so much fun! #super mario bros #smb #mario and luigi #superstar saga #luigi #prince peasley #luisley #luigi x peasley #peaches' fancy fics #peaches’ prodigious prompts

[smute]

[SORRY to the anon who wanted the soup resippy i tried saving your ask as a draft to type all this out but then it disappeared 😬😬😬]

ok so this is essentially a variation of my grandma’s [1] linsensuppe, so im gonna give u both resippies. my version isnt technically mine, i stole the inspiration for it from the fancy restaurant deli place i worked at many moons ago, but i never saw an actual recipe, i just got one free meal per shift and had this soup very often and eventually tried to recreate it from memory months after i was fired for being too cute and handsome and sexy. its also the first time im writing this down, so dont expect any exact measurements please. measure with your heart <333

ingredience:

an assortment of (root) vegetables [2] such as:

onions

carrots

celery [3]

leek

potatoes

also:

large brown lentils

bacon

sausages [4]

and of course:

some herbs [5]

salt and pepper

white wine vinegar (for grandma's version); yes lemon juice works too

chili peppers (for mine)

and/or cayenne pepper (for mine)

white vermouth (for mine)

heavy cream (for mine)

prepping the stock:

wash and peel and dice your veggies somewhat finely (like bite-sized pieces, not super fine)

render the bacon (fry on low heat until the fat is extracted) save the bacon bits to add back later if u want

brown the veggies in bacon fat. i start with the onions and then go by hardness. for example, i would add the carrots before the celeriac, which tends to soften pretty quickly [6]

once all the veggies have softened and turned a nice color, simply add water and your leafy herbs and simmer on low heat for as long as you want or can lol. an hour should be enough but the longer the better. DO NOT ADD ANY SALT.

congratulations, you have made unsalted vegetable stock.

for both lentil soup varieties:

rinse the lentils and add them to the unsalted stock [7]

once the lentils have softened, start seasoning

add the diced potatoes and cook those until soft

variety numero uno aka grandma’s lentil soup:

the traditional (german?) lentil soup is seasoned with a splash of vinegar so go ahead and add that (careful though, its just meant to add some tang, not ruin the fucking soup lmao)

add sausage bits and bam. ultimate comfort food. well, penultimate.

variety numero due aka smute’s stolen resippy:

when prepping the stock, add fresh chili peppers according to your own spice tolerance.

also, DEGLAZE THE POT WITH A SPLASH OF WHITE VERMOUTH [8] before u add the water and let it cook down (it will be pretty pungent and smell very citrusy and spicy and vanilla-y and boozy initially but it mellows out quite quickly so just trust your nose. THEN you can add the water and do all the other shit i just told you ok thank you

season with a shit ton of cayenne pepper – either in addition to or instead of the chili peppers, and according to your own spice tolerance. i wouldnt use any spice mixes though. this is just to add heat, not any overpowering flavors

do not touch that fucking vinegar. turn off the heat and add half a cup of heavy cream instead. your soup should turn from toddler poop into a delicious thick beige-y white clam chowder slop. maybe with an orangy cayenne pepper tint if youre not a pussy (/handjob)

add sausage slices to warm them up and dig in

🦶footnotes:

[1] idiomatic; my grandma wasnt very big on cooking lol

[2] commonly referred to as “suppengrün” in german, a flavor base similar to a french mirepoix or an italian soffritto. the specific ingredients vary by region but usually suppengrün includes carrots, celeriac (see below), parsley root, rutabaga or some other turnip variety, curly parsley, et cetera et cetera

[3] celeriac aka celery root aka knob celery; yes, you can use celery stalks instead but they do taste different imo. celery stalks are also a lot saltier so idk how that would affect the lentils. dont skip the celery though because it gives you that essential soup flavor

[4] frankfurters? the smoked pork link sausages kind. i know food terminology is somewhat tricky once you cross the atlantic (im just assuming an american will read this lmao) and ive heard that you guys have hot dogs without the casing on like. crustless sandwiches? which. i cant even imagine what that is like but anyway. not the canned vienna sausages please. for my grandma

[5] you cant go wrong with curly parsley, i mean its so mild and inoffensive parsley goes with pretty much anything and it adds some nice color as well. yes you can use flat leaf instead lmao. basickly i would recommend anything you'll find in a fines herbes mix aka parsley, chives, chervil, and tarragon. that combo is a staple of french cuisine but they're widely used here as well so if you're going for the classic flavor, any of these will do the trick.

[6] if you don’t eat pork or want a vegetarian version, or if you’re just making stock, you can totally skip the bacon and use oil instead

[7] i’ve always been told that lentils have to be cooked in unsalted liquid. idk the science behind it and if we’re being honest, it’s probably some bullshit myth BUT! one time i did cook them with salt and they came out weird and hard and disgusting and it could of course be related to something totally different but what can i say. belief integrated. dont add salt until they’re soft. something that IS NOT a myth is the lentil variety. for this resippy you need LARGE BROWN lentils (tellerlinsen for all germans). the whole point of this soup is its creamy sloppy deliciousness and the soft mealy mushy consistency you get from large brown lentils adds a lot to that. small brown varieties (berglinsen for all germans) tend to keep their shape more and refuse to be slopified. ive never used red or yellow lentils or whatever for this soup so try at your own risk.

[8] vermouth is just fortified (distilled) wine thats been flavored with all kinds of shit (herbs and spices). i have a small bottle of martini bianco in my pantry that i only use for special dishes and while it is disgusting as a drink, it adds SO MUCH complexity to all kinds of foods it really is worth it. anyway. im gonna go out on a limb and say that you can also use a sweet white wine. maybe use a more generous amount and cook it down a bit? and maybe add a PINCH of sugar

#ask #anon #technically i guess lol #sorry tumblr ate it #& #slopcore #resippy

[captivebrains]

The delirium files

Based off of an ongoing story I’m writing on wattpad!

This is the first chapter

If you like it please head over to my wattpad and leave some love!

@gpobic is my username

2014, Dec 24th; 7:36 pm

Lana stared out the closed window, enjoying the cold air radiating off of it, cooling her flushed face. The fireplace crackled in the background, along with meshed conversations. Christmas lights draped from the front porch illuminated her face, glimmering in her eyes. It was a peaceful night, her family and friends surrounded her; welcoming arms open. Yet she couldn't help but feel something missing. She moved her arm, stretching the itchy fabric of her painfully tight turtleneck. Snow was falling gently onto the ground, not a footprint in sight. A soft hand rested on her shoulder, Lana turned to look and was met with the comforting presence of her mother. "Is everything okay baby?" She smiled leaning down to match Lana's height; Lana nodded trying to ignore the tears welling up in her eyes. Even if she wasn't upset, her mother's safe tone always pulled tears out of her. "What's wrong my love? Has someone hurt your feelings?" Her mother's eyes were full of concern, she placed a gentle hand on Lana's cheek rubbing her thumb in circles. " I don't know what's wrong, I always get like this near Christmas." She wiped her tears away with her sleeve, not daring to look her mother in the eye. "But honey that's not normal for a girl your age, you should be thrilled, and excited."

Lana frowned, pushing her mom away "no, what's not normal is that yesterday we were trying to hide all of dads needles from the cops, and today we're eating on our fine China like nothing ever happened."

Her mother leaned in closer, her voice coming down to a whisper. "You know we're in a tough situation right now Lana, but please don't let it ruin your Christmas. I love you, and so does daddy." She pressed a kiss to her daughter's forehead and shot her a sympathetic look, "why don't you meet me in the basement and I'll bring you a few drinks?" Lana's face lit up, she nodded excitedly before shutting the window curtains and making her way to the basement; she carefully walked passed the people crammed into her kitchen, ignoring the scattered 'hello's' and 'how are you doing? Before she could reach the door she felt her iPod vibrate in her pocket, she stopped and pulled it from her pocket; reading the text

———————————————————————

Billie

Let me come to your place, it's so boring over here it's painful :(

———————————————————————

Lana smiled reading the text, having Billie with her for Christmas would make it more tolerable. She quickly shot her a text back, telling her to hurry over.

2019 June 2nd; 9:05 am

Sunlight poured into the room, cigarette smoke hung in the air. Lana pried her eyes open, her mouth stretching in a yawn. She sighed looking around the room; vinyl was hung on the eggshell-colored walls, and golden curtains draped above her; covering a large window showcasing the peaceful beach below them. Lana sat up combing her messy black hair with her fingers, then reached down and grabbed a cigarette from the nightstand beside her. She cringed at the taste of her morning breath mixing in with Tabacco, Glancing over; black and green hair was spread over the pillow. She smiled, moving closer to the figure. Lana snaked her hand around the girl's waist, pulling her closer. With her teeth holding the cigarette in her mouth she muttered close to the girl's exposed ear "are you just gonna lay there all day, or are you gonna come to enjoy this beautiful view with your Even more beautiful girlfriend?""I've been awake waiting for you to get up and make me breakfast" a soft voice replied, Lana barely had time to react before the girl had spun over and was now facing her with a bright "Billie if you ever see me cooking, assume someone has died," Lana spoke before pulling the cigarette out of her mouth, blowing out a cloud of smoke and leaning down; capturing the girl's lips into a soft kiss. Her hands caressed the girl's face, their kisses never seemed to last long enough for Lana. Finally, they pulled away, Billie raised and smirked over at her; "I guess that puts a whole new meaning to ''d kill to have some bacon." They both shared a laugh, their voices echoing in the almost empty condo. "I'll make you a deal if put on a pot of coffee and come soak up this morning sunlight with me; then I'll order us breakfast," Lana spoke, retracting away slightly; and looking into billies eyes which were shining with amusement.

Billie chuckled "So you're telling me that the amazing, multi-talented Lana sunshine can't cook? " Lana simply smiled, biting her bottom lip "since when did you start calling me by my stage name?"

"That's not the point," Billie said smiling mischievously while reaching up and opening the window, the sounds of the palm trees swaying and ocean waves crashing against the shore filled the room immediately.

"Oh I think it's a pretty good point, definitely good enough to bring up" Billie cut her off, leaning in and crashing her lips against Lana's; she reached up, grabbing the cigarette from Lana's hands and pushing it down onto the ashtray putting out its smoldering flame. Her hands moved quickly, burrowing in her hair and trailing down to her lower back. She pulled away but only for a small moment, sucking in quick breaths; "I love that you can't cook" She said before going in for another kiss, her lips moving against Lana's; rougher than the last time, lust overflowing from her tongue. "I love the strongest parts of you and your weakest parts" She spoke against her lips, never once stopping the smooth movement of her hands caressing parts of Lana's body only god had seen. The salty air swirled around them, Lana could taste it with every breath she sucked in. Soon she pulled away breathing heavily, she sat back against the headboard looking over at Billie with a smirk on her face. "You're so weird" she laughed, reaching out and intertwining her hand with hers. "And I love that you're so dramatic." Billies smile faded and her mouth hung open, "I'm not dramatic!" Her smile returned as quickly as it left before adding " if anything, I'm just passionate" she said through a soft smirk. "Well whatever it is you are, I love it."

2014, Dec 24th; 8:17

"Dude, my mom went ballistic today; over some bullshit with her finding condoms in finneas room. She was throwing shit threatening to kick him out if he ever got a girl pregnant". Billie shook her head, pausing for a moment; taking a sip of her drink, a smile creeping up on her face. "The funny part is, they weren't even his; they were mine. I had gotten them in a gas station bathroom with a couple of friends and then hid them in his room as a joke. You should have seen the look on his face when she found them." Lana laughed, trying not to choke on the warm beer sitting in her mouth, she fought to swallow it; gasping for a breath of air once she finally did. "Did you ever tell her it was you?" She said between small chuckles. Billie just shook her head, sipping out of the can; her eyes quickly widened and she frantically pointed at Lana. She swallowed the remaining liquid before speaking "I did end up telling finneas; though, he wasn't as mad as I thought he was gonna be; he wasn't mad at all. He thought it was pretty funny, to be honest." She said smirking while cracking open another beer. Lana used her sleeve and wiped away any residue sitting at the top of her lip before setting down her drink and standing up. Billie watched her with curious eyes; Lana walked over to a wide wooden board propped up onto the wall. She pulled it off of the wall and laid it on the ground, revealing a small hole carved onto the cement. She reached her hand into it and pulled out a small carton, Billie could see from the small couch they were sitting on that it was a carton of cigarettes. "Where'd you get that?" She asked, slightly amused that Lana would even think of touching a cigarette. "My dad leaves them laying around, he's too junked up half the time to notice they're gone. He'll just drive to the gas station and buy another pack." Billie scoffed as Lana took her seat back onto the couch, reaching out and offering her a cigarette. Billie shook her head "if there's one thing I won't do its smoke." Lana smiled and pulled her arm away resting it on her lap "well what do you do?" Billie smirked and shrugged her shoulders "I write music from time to time." Lana scoffed pretending to be offended " and why haven't you told me about this?" She said before taking the cigarette and putting it into her mouth. She reached down into the couch and pulled up a small green lighter; flicking it on and lighting the dart. She took a small breath trying to hold in the smoke, but a few seconds later she was spewing it out and coughing like a madman. Billie couldn't contain her laughter, she was practically rolled over on the couch laughing with tears in her eyes. When Lana finally stopped coughing Billie raised and wiped a small tear from her eye, "I'm gonna go out on a limb and say you've never done that before?" "Shut up"

#billie eilish #fypppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppp #fanfic #drabble #smut #sentimental #celebrity #celebrity reader #billie eilish x reader #billie eilish x oc #lgbtq #wlw #gxg #womanxwoman #lesbian #billie eilish fanfic #finneas #Spotify

[thisisuno]

COLORS ARE A LIE

in which Jung Wooyoung, an art major (struggling to get through art block) stumbles upon a person dressed in only black and white. Despite the monochromatic pallet, the person seems to be more interesting than any color he could think of.

art major!Jung Wooyoung x gn!reader

warnings/genre: fluff, strangers to lovers, really nothing to warn about.

inspired by E ve's song YOKU

The professor's words went in one ear and out the other. From what Wooyoung could tolerate to hear that day it was something about composition and how people perceive the color they paint. Head down on the wooden desk, he looks towards his classmates and see that they're all taking notes and what not. Don't get him wrong, he loves art and his major, after all he wouldn't be attending a university just for visual arts if he didn't love it. It's just he's going through something all artists dread, art block.

Art block is one of the most infuriating things and it just had to happen to Wooyoung right when the semester started. Tapping his nails against the desk, he put his head down in between his arms and sighed. He was zoning out, lost in his thoughts until his seat-mate and friend, Choi San, nudged him with his elbow.

"Dude, snap out of it, class is over," he kept nudging the boy until Wooyoung lightly slapped him in retaliation.

"Yeah, yeah. I'm going. I know when I'm not wanted," Wooyoung playfully whined as he gathered his bag and supplies. The two walked out of the lecture hall and out of the art building. "San-ie, why don't we stop by Sulbing Myeongdong and get some Bingsu!" the younger perked up as his mouth watered and the dessert.

"Alright but you're paying!" The other replied as they gradually made their way down to the cafe. It wasn't as packed as they thought it would've been considering the amount of college students that go there. The waiter, a nice man and fellow classmate Yeosang led them to a table by the front window.

Wooyoung looked upon the busy streets in a disoriented fashion. It could just be the art block talking but he swore he's seen the same exact scene play out over and over. Out there are people running late to classes, the happy couple that walks by and those professors who need fresh air from time to time. There was nothing new, both to draw and in life.

San talked aimlessly about some of the Bingsu flavors but Wooyoung couldn't help but let it go in one ear and out the other. The jingle of the door chimes pulled the boy out from his thoughts as your eyes met his. Your black turtle neck and slacks mixed with the white from your coat are what first caught his eye. Then they trailed upwards to meet yours who were already staring at him.

It was as if there was a pop or rather eruption somewhere in his mind. A spark, a feeling rushed through his veins as his shining eyes never left your figure. The feeling he soon learned, was inspiration. "Wooyoung, you're doing it again! People are gonna think you're a creep!" San once again tapped the younger's head.

"U-uh yeah but...woah," He couldn't really finish his sentence as he got up and walked over to your table. Your eyes met his once again, and he could feel the spark lighting again.

"Hi! Is there anything I can do for you?" You spoke up first as you motion for the man in front of you to take a seat. He took your offer and sat down, eyeing what you assumed was his friend on the other side of the cafe. You've never seen him in any of your lectures but if anything you know the look of an artist.

"I just wanted to ask-," Wooyoung paused for a moment, "what is the best art tip you could give,". He cursed himself for being extremely blunt but it stopped when he saw the look on your face. Amusement.

"Well, I guess it would make sense considering we are in an art school that you would ask me this," You laughed off the awkwardness and gave him a smile in return. "The best art tip, you say? First of all what's it for? I won't spill these secrets for nothing!" The playfulness in your voice caught him off guard yet not one bit of it was unwelcome. For someone who dressed so monochromatic, you were colorful...in a sense.

"Well, I'm sure you understand what an art block is right? I may or may not be going through one right now," He chuckled as he brushed the back of his neck. A light red was painted on his cheeks, it was cute. The corners of your lip perked up a little as you rested your chin in your palm.

"Well, at least tell me your name first,".

"Oh sh-, it's Wooyoung! Jung Wooyoung,".

"Wooyoung? That's a pretty name. Mine is [Last Name] [Name]," you spoke as you took a spoonful of your Bingsu and placed it in your mouth. After savoring a bit of the flavor, you finally decided it was time to answer Wooyoung's inquiry. "The greatest art tip that I can give to another person is that the art one paints should still look the same with or without colors. Colors are a lie, simple as that," The boy looked puzzled at the statement.

Colors were an incredibly important thing to any art piece. It gave it feeling and it describes the subject, so how could it be a lie?

You figured the reaction on his face was normal. After all, art majors like you and him were taught about the importance of colors from day one. You admit you had the same reaction when you were told this as well.

"Say color is like a house with no foundation. You have the house and it looks beautiful but if it gets wiped away, you wouldn't be able to tell there was anything there in the first place. Don't rely on colors to do all the hard work and build yourself an unstable house. You can build a house with black and white but instead you get foundation. The foundation in this case is the ability to shade the subject with various grays and portray texture albeit the lack of variety," It was a mouthful but it seemed like you got your point across to him.

Wooyoung safe to say was stunned at the explanation. Unlike San's ranting earlier, he took each and every word into careful consideration. He looked downwards for a moment before looking up again at you. There you saw him make a grin that reached his eyes.

"Well, would it be too much to ask if you'd be the subject of my next piece?" Even though you spoke about color being a lie, you quite liked the rosy red on his cheeks. Feigning pondering for a moment, you agreed to his proposal.

Wooyoung realized something that day you came over and helped break his art block. The saying color is a lie not only applied to art but real life as well. Someone in the world could do the most exciting things but would it even matter in the end if they forgot about it the next day? The useless, unimportant things that brought memories were the most important, Wooyoung thought as he gazed as his finished art piece.

It was a world with color, but the subject remained to only be in black and white. The world was flat with no emotions despite the mixtures, but the person, You, seemed to outshine all of it. Just like how you would in Jung Wooyoung's head.

#ateez #ateez fanfic #ateez x reader #ateez wooyoung #jung wooyoung #wooyoung x reader #jung wooyoung x reader #ateez jung wooyoung #atz x reader #atz fluff #wooyoung x you #wooyoung x y/n #ateez fluff #ateez imagines #ateez scenarios #no beta we die like men

[leffee]

What do you think the los crew eats like?

Oh, I'm very happy to talk about this, food is always a good topic and I actually have a lot of thoughts about it. We'll start withhh hmmm Zoe! So,

Zoe - she's basically very careful with how much she eats, not necessarily what though. She doesn't have any calorie limit set, she just tries not to eat too much and it actually works for her. She says she prefers salads to meat, but it's not exactly true. It's not that she dislikes salads or fruits or vegetables, no, but she likes meat way more than she claims. When she gets cravings they're more times about meat than sweets. She doesn't eat a lot of sweets and refuses to eat chocolate, half because of this diet of hers, half because she's genuinely just not that into them. One more thing: she loves trying different cusines, she'd much rather go to a specific country-themed restaurant than a fast food place for example.

Minka - like Zoe she likes trying out different cusines, but she has a few favourites, especially mexican, so she's a bit more picky in that way. However, picky in general she is not, willing to try almost everything at least once. Her favourite taste is definitely sweet, so: cookies, cakes, chocolate, etc. Bonus points if it has banana in it. She really likes baking, cakes yes, but her guilty pleasure is baking bread, especially banana bread. She usually improvises at least a bit when baking, adding more or less than the recipe requires, or some extra ingridients. Really likes fast food also and basically anything to drink that is colorful.

Pepper - basically anything that is deemed unhealthy is her favourite lol, fast food, pizza, ice cream, etc - stuff that you expect to be there when going out to a busy city area. Mostly into salty foods but she also likes sour and can eat that without grimacing most of the time. Genuinely doesn't enjoy most vegetables, a bit better with fruits. She actually appears quite picky in the food department when compared to the rest of them. Oh, but no matter what they're eating she's always willing to "borrow" food from others. Food always tastes better when it's somebody else's :].

Vinnie - I will squeeze him here because him and Pepper are honestly quite similar when it comes to what they like eating. If he could eat fast food for the rest of his life he would, and if, you know, he had enough money for that because that shit be expensive. It's honestly probably the only reason why he (and Pepper) don't have any nourishment deficits etc. They're both gonna get fat once their metabolisms inevitably slow down, lol. When it comes to fruits and vegetables he has a few things he can eat, more fruits, but not a big fan. He tries eating spicy stuff at least once in a while to increase his tolerance for those, because when he's at Sunil's he usually has spicy stuff and he really wants to eat everything Sunil gives him. It works decently actually. He also can eat edible insects (duh), it's not his favourite food or anything, but he can, especially to surprise someone. He can eat them all if they're prepared correctly, the only insects he refuses to eat are cockroaches. His favourite are silkworms and crickets. Just like Zoe he loves meat, like a lot, could not become a vegetarian if he tried.

Sunil - he knows what he likes and is rather reluctant to try new dishes. His taste is basically a mix of indian and american cuisine. He genuinely loves veggies, and yes, he prefers them to meat or anything else, really. While Zoe might lie about how she likes salads oh so much, he genuinely does love them and all those similar things. Basically the kind of person who will go out to McDonald's and order a salad, hehe. Big, big ice cream enjoyer, eats them no matter the season, the weather, etc. Of course, also a big spicy food enjoyer and spices, condiments and herbs in general. Also, really likes Minka's banana bread specifically. And mango, stands to reason.

Russell - I honestly always thought of him as not having any strong opinions on most foods or tastes. He's chubby, yes, but he actually doesn't eat all that much, Vinnie genuinely eats more than he does and Vinnie's a stick. So he's fine with almost anything, least picky among (us) all of them, the one limit he has is just not too eat too much unhealthy stuff at a time. He drinks more than he eats; coffee, tea, juice and water. However, sometimes he gets craving for one specific thing and then he really needs to eat it. It's very random, sometimes it's apples, other times it can be pepperoni pizza. He can also eat few kinds of edible insects, less kinds than Vinnie but there are a few. Well, he can, but he really never does, because if there's an option to eat something else why would he eat literal insects?

Penny - her favourite taste is definitely sweet, it's very dominant in her, no other taste comes even close to how much she likes sweet stuff. So a big sweet tooth. She refuses very few things, but she has her favourites, knows what she wants and would rather not eat anything she's not already familiar with. She's also a big fan of sugary drinks, but tries to drink the suger-free options, they taste the same to her, so why not? She knows what she wants and does like making her meals herself if she has time: cooking, baking, or anything else, because she knows how to do it to hit her taste the right way. If it's bought ready it's just not the same.

Anyone else hungry now?

#asks #lps 2012

[dine-on-nervine]

still missing the Editable Reblogs thing

Did you know that all the fish are dying out? I thought that was bananas they were talking about.

Would you ever wear a white tuxedo? Sounds impractical if were an outdoor event (and I tend to be the one crawling to plug stuff in) but hey, there might be an occasion.

Do you judge a book by its cover? In people, it happens. In other things, I keep in mind that package design is an artform and not everyone has that skill. Fonts and colors matter!

Do you like chips and dips? Absolutely.

Last time you went on a rollercoaster: Been years.

Ever been to a pottery class? I have not but I'd be game. Seems more something that interested me as a teenager than now though.

Does your milkshake bring all the boys to the yard? Ha, no. << You might if you opened a Dairy Queen, Steph. :) I don't want boys in my yard, I live in a rental and am a straight male.

Who was the last person to stay over at your house? Tanya. Who will be back this Saturday.

Do you like red lipstick? Not really, no. Red is still more tolerable than most other colors, but I really prefer uncolored lips if I'm gonna be smooching them.

Can you recall your country’s national anthem? Was just having that conversation with my girlfriend -- how there can be a song or speech you knew before junior high that you can still pull from the depths of your brain decades later. So yes.

Do you believe in ghosts? I think there are spirits but not in a "boo!" way.

Which sweets/candy would you put into your dream pic'n'mix? Peanut M&Ms and Haggen's bridge mix.

If you had a boat, where would you sail in your boat? For nostalgia's sake, Lake Rimrock. But I'm not much of a boater.

Can you rap? I stutter and stumble even when I speak at regular pace.

Are you a light sleeper? Can be, but otherwise when I go to bed I'm out cold.

When you were young, did you ever pretend to “marry” somebody? This wasn't on my agenda.

What is your favourite Disney film? I don't claim to have one.

Do you prefer brown or white bread? Brown, with plenty of other stuff in it. Just straight brown like honey wheat always tastes like it's dried out.

Have you ever spent an entire day in bed? It's been awhile. I could have done that today but...

Don’t you just find it annoying when people get too much plastic surgery? Happily most of those people are far from my orbit. I think it's silly when I see some person who has had Too Much Work Done because they typically look far worse than whatever they would have looked like naturally.

How high’s your pain threshold? Not very high at all.

What would you wear to a red carpet event? Shoes. Don't want to get footprints on it.

Whose birthday is next, out of all the people you know? Tanya's is in a week or two.

What kind of coat are you going to wear in the winter? I just have this brown coat from Costco that does what it needs to.

Did you ever go through a Goth phase? I was from a small town, but I had a phase where I hung out with goths in other towns for being different. I preferred being an ally to being a member, mostly because I like the music in small doses.

Do you find architecture interesting? Quite interesting sometimes. Not so much the classical but what's downtown... questions about the past come to mind.

When on the computer do you ever think about how it all works? I think about when it doesn't work and how to fix it.

How many songs are there in your iTunes library? I don't put music into it, I just use the software to load the iPods.

Describe the worst date you’ve ever been on: I have been on some lousy ones but I can't say they've been epicly bad, not the sort of bad dates that make Reddit posts. I will toss out the first one that comes to mind -- the chick that left me at the table to order drinks while she "went to the restroom" and snuck out. Happily the service was terrible that evening so no drinks got ordered before I realized she wasn't coming back and had blocked me.

When did you last go to the park? I took Tanya to Point Defiance Park a couple weeks ago. Didn't get out of the car but the question says "when did you last go to the park?" and that's when I went to the park.

Which two animals would you breed together to make a hybrid? Frog and duck.

Do you ever forget how to walk? I can't walk, soooo. << ohhh!!! It happens, or rather my legs stay down while my body gets up.

Do you own a Jesus bracelet? I do not.

How far out can you stick your tongue? Bend over and take a measurement.

Do you like David Bowie? I do like some, but I don't really call myself much of a fan. My bestie is a fan so I've heard a lot, a quantity of it repeated a few times (thank you "Scary Monsters"), but if I have to name a couple songs I like they would be the Let's Dance edition of "Cat People (Putting Out Fire)" due to that slammin' guitar by Stevie Ray Vaughn... and "Heroes".

Would you eat a live cockroach if it made you a millionaire? Gross as that is, a million smackers...

Does it annoy you when you feel like people aren’t really listening? I had that discussion with Tanya yesterday. Brief synopsis is that she has this thing where she doesn't know when to stop talking / how to end a conversation, so I am often guilty of sitting there letting her go on and on and then when she stops I am at a loss for what to say. I told her I am working on this and it does not mean I wasn't listening, I just don't know what to say in response and if I had a thought while she was speaking of what I want to say I have forgotten it by then.

Are you the type who usually plays it safe? Usually. I take some risks if there's a reason.

Do you want what you can’t have? Constantly. Not in a painful way (anymore) but I am aware of my desires and I am aware of my ability to get them, and I am aware also that life goes on and I do have my own set of blessings.

Ever been copied by somebody, clothing or style-wise? Actually, it's been awhile but yes.

Is there a point to clear nail varnish? It keeps ink off the wood portion of the bottom of a rubberstamp, that's why I own one bottle. I am also told it protects the nails.

What is the latest time you’ve ever woken up? Seven pee-em.

Ever gotten into trouble over something you didn’t really do? It has happened. And my boss presumes that if an item at the store was not put away correctly that I might know something about it, and half the time that's not the case. Oh, prime example from last Saturday: Customer ordered six of these plumbing stem pullers and on Thursday we were shipped nine, with the other three going to the empty peg. I took the box, put it on the receiving desk, wrote what is in it on it, told the assistant receiver (who had been asking me for a couple hours if I had found it!) that here it is, put the other three where they belong and I went about my merry way. Boss takes me to that peg on Saturday to ask why I didn't pull that special order. I had no idea what he was talking about, so told him I knew there was a special order for 6 stem pullers so put them on the desk, the assistant knew this, etc. Turns out someone took that box off the receiving desk and put it on the top shelf over where the item belongs... Oh!! Not me, chief! And then that helpful soul didn't put anything else that needed to actually be put away out. Which I also heard about, since apparently I am in charge of everything even though he acknowledged there were two people in on both Thursday and Friday who stock that clearly did not stock.

Are you currently ill? Not really.

Don’t you just hate being corrected? Depends upon what it is and how it's being done. And, of course, whether the thing I am being corrected on is actually wrong, since some people will speak without confirming they're right first.

Are there any really beautiful buildings close to where you live? My present neighborhood, not really. But a mile away down the road in either direction both have rich histories.

Who do you think about most? Boobies.

Do you have embarrasing parents? I guess not really, now, but I haven't been a teen in ages.

How often do you use the word “poltent”? Never, since I don't know it. Looked it up, and it appears to be a Polish word meaning aesthetic... there's a facial product and an advertising agency by that name.

How’s your grandmother? Both are dead. So they're doing just fine now.

What in your opinion is the most annoying noise in the world? [smiles at that scene from Dumb & Dumber where one of the brothers asks that question then screeches] I don't know for sure, there are a lot of sounds that I can do without. I will admit -- and I hope you're not reading this, Tanya -- that there's this sound my girlfriend has on her sleep noise generator app, one she has been using for years but doesn't play when I'm there, that combines television white noise with a rainfall. Individually I might be able to sleep with either, moreso the rain than the white noise since my head says "turn off the TV" when I hear it, but them together I was kind of twitching at because it was... "impure nature" to me, like if you were too close to a humming power station located near woods.

Are you any good at writing? I do my best.

Can you speak any Spanish? Not good at speaking it.

What’s your favourite type of cloud? Altocumulus or cirrus.

What’s something that really matters to you? My leisure time and the ability to afford it.

Did that pass some time? I should have been in the shower an hour ago so yes.

#100 ?'s

[imfirequeen]

*sits cutely* so who's elis and why's he such a comfort character

Good god this is about to be a roller coaster

Ima start with the second part my brain cannot register and when I asked Raine he said it’s a comment not a question? So I’ll just say thank

So *elis* uhhh tw warning for abuse death suicide mention

Elis is an oc I initially made to well die, Raine (gotta love how this guy keeps poppin up amiright? Lol) on the other hand, had different plans and got attached to the dumb fuck and asked me to not kill him off, so I sat on it and before I knew it man’s a comfort character.

Well, this idiot grew up violently abused by his mom and neglected from his father.

Around when this fucker turned 17 some guys thought it would be funny to rough you the weird kid bc why not? Yea well it got too aggressive and Elis ended up fighting to live, and to the un being known to the muggers, Eli’s has an ability to spawn many and any weapons. Which at the time he could not control and kinda just appeared when he was terrified. He ended up killing them. In the shock of it it’s like a switch clicked in his head, that he didn’t have to keep taking hits. He could make them stop for good. After sitting a good while with his good friend Joey (Raines oc) he got up and left, he killed his parents. He hates himself violently for everything he’s done but he’s decided if he’s gonna be alive, and of course u kill a murderer there’s still the same amount of murderers, so he made it his mission to kill as many bad people he could. He didn’t go on a whim, he always made sure there was proof these bastards were guilty. In this process he met Zoey who was pretending to be a victim to one of Eli’s’ targets (her target too) and, oh boy did she lOVE to abuse his emotions, putting nooses around his neck and yanking him around. She always got her way with him and convinced him they were in the same side!!! He believed her. He thought she was the same as him, wanted to make sure no one would get hurt and be broken, like him, like her he thought! Didn’t even realize the emotional and physical abuse she was putting him through bc of how well she convinced him she’s on his side or it’s “fun.” Well while dealing with that Elis finally found karmin, karmin was a victim to one of Elis’ targets tho, when Elis got there it wasn’t what he expected. The target was already dead?! Yep karmin managed to kill a guy in self defense. Elis could tell karmin wasn’t doing too hot, and that he wasn’t like him or Zoey. He took karmin home hiding him from Zoey and started taking care of him, almost abandoned him at one point too, but couldn’t do it he’s too fragile after all. Well, Zoey knew where Elis lived of course and she was not happy to meet karmin. After all who the fuck was this to be playing with her toy?! She wasn’t having none of it and this was the day Elis finally saw zoeys true colors as he walked in on her trying to slam karmins face into a hot stove iron. He kicked her out even tho she tried to play innocent but Elis knew this wouldn’t be the end of her. He got involved with the police. 1940s ish (with extra bs bc brr funnie) cops aren’t what we have today so easy to get kinda sketchy Elis managed to make a deal with the cops to work for them with a pardon if he took down Zoey, bc she was pretty bad ngl. Ofc the cops thought he’d die in the process and ignored most of anything he was giving them on her. He ended up disappearing and the cops didn’t fucking notice but you know who did? And who ran in there screaming? Karmin. Karmin found a superior that gave a damn to help him and in the search they found Elis, burried alive! A moment longer he would have been dead. Elis Thought he was a lost cause so as a good bye, a last ily, had carved a k into his palm, (which is still there!) well Elis eventually got Zoey and had her put in a special unit, and changed stations. Now he has a new mix of people that either tolerate him or hate him! Oh did I mention he’s super flirty as a coping mechanism? Bc he is, but of course, Zoey broke free and now he has to constantly watch his back~

#lore #god fucking god #asks #tw: self harm #tw: violence #tw: abuse #tw: suicide mention #tw: death #this is slightly vague bc I don’t wanna go into all the details publicly #but this is the gist of Elis!

[notmuchfordancing]

its time to go - taylor swift | shop ✨

#taylor swift #tswiftedit #tswiftlyrics #Taylor Swift Lyrics #candy swift #lettering #and we're doneeee #gonna mix some colors from the tolerate it #but we're done #nmfdlettering #nmfdevermore

[heymrstargazer]

happy 200th hc!! as a thank you im doing the same thing as last time where im taking the most popular one and basically making it into a mini fic. with that being said, i offer the extended version of the beanboozled hc :) 

Neil was completely lost. Sure, he knew he was in the candy aisle of a CVS, but between the various brands and types of everything from chocolate to gummy worms to caramels, he had no fucking clue what he was doing. 

Andrew had groggily sent him out for coffee, candy, and some medicine to help relive the allergies that were kicking his ass. Neil was usually fine with it, knowing where the typical sweets Andrew had asked for were, but this time he had a specific request; jelly beans. Neil had never looked for jelly beans before, much less among the thousands of other brightly colored bags. Finally, after staring pensively for at least two minutes, he spotted it buried around many other oddly-flavored candies. 

The only one that caught his eye, though, was a package with ‘Bean Boozled’ written in bold yellow letters. While pulling off the regular bag, he inspected the package closer. ‘CAUTION! Contains Weird & Wild flavors,’ it read. He tucked the normal bag under his arm.

Andrew had specifically requested the variety pack of Jelly Belly. This seemed to have the same branding, so really Neil was just following instructions, right?

He read through the flavors, interest piqued as they seemed to get worse and worse from stinky socks to canned dog food to skunk spray. It would be a crime not to test them, right?

The cashier was completely uninterested as he tossed everything onto the counter, too busy plotting to notice if they said anything, anyway.

By the time he got home, he had his plan ready. He pulled into the parking garage, checking carefully that Andrew wasn’t smoking by the railing awaiting his return. The coast clear, Neil opened the package and dumped a considerable amount into his hand. He dumped them into the bag of normal ones, holding it closed tightly and shaking it until they were all mixed together. If Andrew asked why it was open, he would just tell him he tried one, simple as that. 

Neil knew things were plenty okay enough for him to pull a stunt like this. Yes, Andrew would probably kick his ass, and yes he’d get more “I hate you”s than normal, but a small break of trust like this was insubstantial. 

The cats greeted him with disinterest after realizing he had not brought them any new toys or treats. Andrew only seemed interested because of the candy and plastic bag hanging over his shoulder. He took it as a win anyway, greeting him with a small kiss and handing over the bags. Andrew took them without question.

“I’m gonna take a quick shower,” he said before pressing a kiss to Andrew’s temple. He got a nod in response and swiftly headed down the hall and to the bathroom. Was he hiding? Maybe, but it was for his own safety.

Thinking about it, Neil had never seen Andrew disgusted by any foods. Other things, sure, but he always carefully chose what he liked and was picky when it came to new things. 

Neil was just helping him out of his comfort zone. 

It felt like a sound argument until Andrew came charging into the bedroom minutes after Neil was done with his shower. He had only managed to pull on a pair of joggers before standing face to face with Andrew across the bed.

“What did you do?” he asked, but it didn’t feel like a question. Neil bit down a grin, seeing the fire behind Andrew’s eyes as Neil’s wry expression seemed only to aggravate him more. “Come here.”

“Why?” he questioned instead of refusing off the bat. 

“Because,” Andrew answered, standing a little straighter to seemingly calm down. 

Neil gave him a mockingly quizzical look. “Because why?”

Andrew’s tolerance broke in record time. “Because if I have to taste moldy fucking cheese, you do too, asshole”

Neil’s grin only grew as Andrew circled the bed, lunging for his wrist but missing as Neil vaulted over the bed and took off for the living room. 

Neil stupidly backed himself into the kitchen, cornered in record time as Andrew threateningly held a handful of jelly beans between them. King came up behind him on the counter, checking to make sure the commotion wasn’t worthwhile before continuing with whatever it was she was doing. Neil snatched her off the counter, using her to shield himself from Andrew.

“Coward,” Andrew said, rolling his eyes and stepping away. It felt like too easy of a win.

He was proven right as he opened his mouth to defend himself, instead receiving a handful of jelly beans that he couldn’t block because of King sitting in his arms. Of course he would screw himself over like that. 

Andrew picked King up and sent her off with a scratch behind the ears, watching smugly as Neil worked his way through the twenty jelly beans in his mouth. Things were fine, an odd mix of fruity flavors, until he chewed one with the unmistakable flavor of vomit. He hurried to spit them out in the trash can, all with Andrew watching in amusement from where he was leaning against the counter. 

“That was horrible,” Neil said, quickly getting a glass of the first thing in the fridge. 

“Really? I wouldn’t have guessed.” Neil shook his head at the familiar deadpan, stepping slightly closer after downing the cup of chocolate milk.

He set it on the counter next to Andrew, looking at him ruefully. “I offer my sincerest apologies for putting you through such a traumatic experience.” He emphasized dramatically, setting his hands on Andrew’s waist. Andrew hummed in a way that said he accepted it, pulling him closer but suddenly stopping a mere inch away.

His hand firmly against Neil’s chest to keep him there, Andrew said, “Go brush your teeth first.”

Neil grinned with a small huff of amusement, dragging Andrew along with to do the same. Needless to say that bag of jelly beans was spoiled so he’d have to go get more later, but at least Andrew would go with him (to make sure he didn’t pull the same shit again).

#aftg #all for the game #neil josten #andrew minyard #tfc #aftg hc #tfc hc #andreil #the foxhole court #king fluffkins #daily aftg hc

[kingdaddydaichi]

can i request consensual hate sex between bakugou and f!reader

Oooooh yassssss! This idea got better and better the more I thought about it, Nonny. Love it! I hope you enjoy this naughty little slice of grudge fuck pie. 💖

Riding The Fine Line 💥 Katsuki Bakugou x f!reader 💥 NSFW

MINORS DO NOT INTERACT or I'll have my Big Scary BoomBoom Man blow your little ass up!

Word Count: 2k

"Oi! Who picked this shitty restaurant anyway?", Bakugou sneered as he walked towards the table.

You rolled your eyes and mumbled, "Oh look, Gorilla Man is here".

"Watch it, shitty girl. M'not in the mood for your shit tonight".

You'd made plans earlier in the week to meet Kiri and Mina for dinner. You knew Bakugou had been invited too, but after having suffered through it so many times over the past year or so of having some friends in common, you somehow managed to tolerate his presence. It helped that the drink you'd been sipping on made him somewhat less intolerable than usual.

It was like nails down a chalkboard every time Bakugou reared his big dumb head. His only redeeming quality was that he was quite easy on the eyes. Shame that such a hot guy is also such a huge asshole.

He's always given everyone a hard time, but unlike most people, you just wave a dismissive hand at him. And it makes him crazy. He doesn’t understand why he doesn’t get under your skin like he so easily does others. Oh, he annoys the piss out of you to be sure, but he doesn't hurt your feelings per se.

"Y'know, for such a massive ego yours sure is delicate, you meat head".

"Oh yeah? Well, for such a massive ass yours s-"

"God, Bakugou, do you ever just shut up?", you snipped.

Kiri and Mina both jumped in, laughing nervously and smoothing things over to lower the tension. He growled at you. You flipped him a subtle bird before looking away and trying to ignore him.

💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥

Kiri's birthday was approaching and several of his friends decided to throw him a surprise birthday party. You, Denki, Mina, and ugh, as luck would have it, Bakugou, were are all put in charge of decorating his house while some other friends took him out for dinner. Midway through, Mina whined while sorting through various sacks, "Oh no! We forgot the disposable rainbow shot glasses!" Mina had a way of putting a cute touch on everything she had her hands in. Denki offered to go with Mina to procure the missing miniature party cups, leaving you and Bakugou alone to hang streamers in Kiri's living room. Probably not the wisest of decisions, but consider the source. 👀

It didn't take long after they were gone for Bakugou to start in on you with his bullshit. Only this time no one was around to referee. You groaned. This was going to be a free for all. You'd already both cut eyes at each other a couple of times.

"You're not doing it right, dumbass!"

"That's a matter of opinion and you can shove yours up your ass, dumbass".

He flipped you off saying, "You can shove this up your ass!", then turned back to his task.

You were so done. Without thinking, you reared back and hurled the roll of streamers as hard as you could, nailing him right in the back of the head. Damn, it felt good.

He whipped around, a vein popping out of his forehead, clenching his teeth. You were quite proud of your aim until he made little explosions in his free hand and said, "You're really pushing your luck with me, woman! If we weren't in Kiri's house right now I'd blast you right through that fucking wall!"

"Pfft, whatever! You wouldn't do shit. You're all bark and no bite, you fucking douche canoe!"

"You ever stop to think that maybe if you weren't such a bitch guys might actually want to talk to you?"

That did it. He'd finally found one of your hot buttons and you couldn't take his shit anymore. You marched right up to him and got right up in his face, height difference be damned.

"You know what, fuck you, Bakugou! I'm not normally like this! You're the only person who…drives me to this madness!", you spat with tears in your eyes.

A second later, his hands were on either side of your face, crashing his lips down onto yours. You were so shocked you froze before pulling away from him, staring at him in astonishment. He just stood there, huffing, glaring back at you, waiting.

You stepped forward and pushed him, his back hitting the wall, hard. But before he could protest, your lips were on his again. He grabbed you by your arms and spun you around, pinning you against the wall. You slipped your tongue past your open mouth, his meeting yours halfway as he pushed his knee between your legs. He pressed his thigh against your sex, shoving his growing cock against your thigh in the process.

Taking the bottom of his shirt into two fistfuls, you eagerly pushed it up to his chest, exposing his washboard abs and god-like pecs. He quickly pulled it over his head and threw it to the floor while your shaky hands got busy with his belt and zipper, urgently, like you couldn't get to him soon enough. But his will took over when he grabbed your wrists and pinned them above your head so he could peel your shirt off. He dipped down to take a mouthful of your tit, cupping what he couldn't fit in his rough hand, swirling his tongue around your nipple, sucking, then releasing you from the inside of his mouth to flick the tip of his tongue over your pink nub. You grabbed two handfuls of his ash blond locks and arched your back off the wall as he gave your other breast the same treatment.

You impatiently tugged on his hair, hungry for the taste of his sweet lips again. Your tongues once again fought for dominance and you gasped when he picked you up in one swift movement. You wrapped your legs around his waist as he carried you to Kiri's bedroom, swinging the door shut behind him before slamming your back against it.

"Put me down", you said forcefully.

He stopped sucking on your neck long enough to rasp, "And why the fuck should I?"

"Because I want to get into your fucking pants, asshole".

For once you two agreed on something and with your feet back on the floor, you got back to work on his pants before reaching in and wrapping your hand around his hot dick. Shit, you could barely get your fingers all the way around it, it was so thick. You stroked him a couple of times before pulling him out, exposing his manhood in all of its mouth-watering glory.

He ran his hand down his sculpted stomach, spreading his fingers to either side of his girth. "Like what you see?" You realized you were staring at his dick and the pre that dripped from it.

"Wouldn't you like to know?", you sassed.

He growled and spun you around, pushing your front against the wall and swiftly closing in behind you. Wisps of your (color) hair fluttered around his hot breath as he breathed down your neck. "You keep on tryin' to hide it, but you want me just as much as I want you, princess, and I'm gonna make an honest girl outta ya".

His battle-hardened hands found their way down your back, around your waist and all the way to your belly before he slid them down, his fingers reaching below your waistband. You willed him to push his hands further down, pressing your backside against his erection. He used one deft hand to unbutton your pants and work your zipper down, granting himself better access. When he mercifully slipped his middle finger between your folds, you couldn't choke back the moan that emerged from the back of your throat.

"Damn", he growled behind your ear, "for someone who can't stand me, your pussy sure is wet for me".

"Shut up", you gritted through your teeth.

The feeling of the rough pad of his finger teasing your swollen clit nearly sent you over the edge. But it was short-lived and you whined when he pulled his hand away to shove your pants down around your ankles, accompanied by your damp panties. Your hands slid down the wall as he yanked your ass back towards him. You hung your head and watched the head of his cock as Bakugou fucked your thighs, back and forth over your slit, coating his fat cock with your slick, readying himself.

When he began pushing into you, your legs shook from the sheer pressure as he slowly filled you up. When he bottomed out, he held himself still, at least considerate enough to give you time to adjust to his size. He waited until you started grinding against him before grabbing your hips, and slowly withdrawing.

"Now let's see if I can fuck all that hate for me out of you". Before you could retort, he slammed his cock back into you, your pitiful cry mixed with his loud groan echoing off the walls of Kiri's bedroom. He set his pace, steady and hard, the cold buckle of his open belt pressing into your skin with every crash of his hips.

"Yeah, who knows? Maybe if you'd get your dick wet every once in a while you wouldn't act like one", you quipped, voice faltering as he pounded into you.

He slowed his pace to bend over you, pushing your hair out of the way before biting down on the nape of your neck.

"Oww!! What the fuck?!"

He stood up straight again, laughing and said, "All bark and no bite, hah? You just hadn't pushed me far enough yet!" The sweet and salty mixture of his sweat and your need could be heard with every loud slap of his skin against yours.

"Fuck! Bakugou-", you whined in spite of yourself.

He grabbed a fistful of your hair and gave it a firm tug. "When're ya gonna stop callin' me by m'last name and call me Katsuki instead?"

"When you stop acting like a raging asshole towards me", you managed as he fucked the breath out of you.

"Brave words for someone in such a compromising position. Now - say - my - fucking - name!". Each word came with its very own plunge of his cock into your mess of a cunt.

Your legs started to give out. "Katsuki!" You hadn't meant to obey him, but he'd kept his word and made you honest.

"That's better". You could hear the smirk in his voice after hearing his first name fall from your quivering lips.

You turned to face him when he pulled out, kissing him hard, his fingers going into your hair. You inched backwards onto the bed, Katsuki crawling in towards you with a primal look in his crimson eyes before nestling his thighs between yours and sheathing himself deep inside you again. Your head rolled back as you arched your back off the bed. Gods, the feeling of him filling you up was quickly becoming your new favorite sensation.

He nuzzled his face against your neck as he rutted into you, pulling your thigh up to his hip bone, raking his teeth against your skin. His breathing had become more labored and he started thrusting faster, your pleasure mounting with the increased friction of his pubic bone against your clit until rays of bliss shot out from every pore of your skin at the speed of light.

"K-ka-tsuki, I'm c-cumming hahh oh goddd!" The pulsating grip that you had on him finally sent him to his end as well, growling your name and cursing between clenched teeth, burying himself deep inside you as he unloaded rope after thick rope of his white hot cum into your snug, soft warmth.

"Seems Shitty Hair’s gonna get more than one surprise tonight", Katsuki said, catching his breath.

You laughed so hard that Katsuki hissed at the feeling of your walls squeezing his sensitive cock so soon after his orgasm.

"You still hate me?", he asked, brushing his lips against yours, supporting his weight with his elbows.

"Hmm...that depends", you said thoughtfully, tracing the cut of his back muscles with your fingertips.

"On what?"

"On whether or not you'd still fuck me if I don't hate you".

He smirked. "I'd still hit it even if you love me", he whispered, showing his softer side as he kissed you, smiling.

#grudge f*ck #katsuki bakugou #i want him to hate me this much #ugh #that man #bakugou katsuki #katsuki bakugo #katsuki #bakugou #bakugo #katsuki smut #katsuki bakugo headcanons #katsuki bakugo imagine #katsuki bakugo x reader #katsuki x y/n #king explosion murder #lord explosion murder #dynamight

[alyssadeliv]

The Forgotten One

First      Previous

Chapter 12

They were going to the zoo. Richard had decided that after two months of her living in the Manor it was time to have some family bonding time. It didn’t matter that most of her time in the last months was used to get to know her new extended family or get reacquainted with her old one. 

He was adamant that she needed the full Gothamite experience, so here they were on a Friday afternoon on a crowded metro, listening as the oldest one tried and explained how Metro’s worked to her. He was so happy, gesticulating and smiling, that she didn’t have the heart to tell him that she indeed knew how the metro worked, having lived in Paris for almost two full years.

After Damian, Richard was her favorite sibling, mostly because she had always seen him as a role model, as part of her training had been inspired by him and his trapeze maneuvers, but she did enjoy the warmth that she tended to feel when he was around. He was patient and had no problem explaining pop culture references to her. Not that she didn't enjoy spending time with her other siblings, it was just that Richard went out of his way to make her feel accepted.

Tim was a very busy person, and their interactions were reserved to 3 a.m. coffee hunts. He wasn’t bad, just closed off, and a little wary of her after his first experience with Damian. Not that she could blame him. But she was a bit closer to his girlfriend, Stephanie Brown, who would come to have dinner at the Manor every week. 

And there was Jason. She refused to address him as her brother, that would just be plain weird. After the initial shock of finding each other again had worn out, it had taken a few weeks for them to finally address the elephant in the room. She could tell that he had struggled with the news that she was Bruce’s biological daughter.

“Dick, maybe speed the lecture a bit so we can still get to the zoo before it closes.” Jason was leaning casually against a wall, finding this whole situation funny. He was wearing jeans and his red leather jacket, nothing special, but if she was honest he looked rather handsome. 

“It’s fine Jaybird, I was just wrapping it up!” He says with a smile, just in time for them to catch the next wagon. Because they spent at least 25 minutes listening to Richard’s lesson, the metro had emptied a bit so they were able to find seats. It was just the three of them, the others would meet them there, after being picked up by Alfred, Damian after school, and Timothy after a meeting. 

“So… I know Bruce said not to ask, but I’ve been dying to know…” Richard starts unsure, afraid to cross a line. They were lucky to score seats in the same section, she was seated with Jason by her side, with Richard in front of him facing them both. “But how exactly did you two meet, I mean it was obviously at… Tibet-'' He caught himself before he could out them as members of the League, you never knew who could be listening in their conversation, so better safe than sorry. “- but why do you know Jason, but Damian didn’t?” 

With a glance to the side, she was more than happy to allow Jason to explain that part. In the two months she lived at the Manor she saw how much they wanted to ask about their relationship, but kept their distance. Aside from Damian, they didn’t feel the need to inform the family about their past. 

“Well, Pixie Pop here was the one to train me for the duration of my time in the Temple. Kicked my ass more times than I can count.” He says with a smirk, while casually butting an arm on the back of her seat. “She taught me most of what I know”

“Most of it?” She was indignant, but the smile on her face betrayed her true emotions.

“To be fair B didn’t totally suck as a parent.” She knew that he and Father didn’t have the best relationship after he came back from his time at the League, but according to Damian, it used to be way worse, not that she would know. Richard seems content with their explanation and didn't demand more information, even if he desperately wanted to. He respects their boundaries, and that only makes her like him more.

When they got to the zoo, Damian and Timothy were already there, but surprisingly Stephanie had tagged along, so now she wasn’t the only female in the group anymore, not that she cared, but she liked her brother’s girlfriend so the surprise was appreciated. 

She had never been to the zoo before, just to see the attractions. The times she went to fight an Akuma did not count. It was a bit sad seeing all these animals stuck in a cage, and she could tell her brother felt the same. Damian always had a soft spot for animals, and would not tolerate if they were being mistreated. Not surprisingly, the Waynes made annual donations to the zoo to ensure that all the animals were well taken care of. When she first heard about that she was glad that Father cared about Damian’s interests enough to pay to support every zoo and animal shelter in the city. It helped ease her guilt for abandoning him for two years knowing that now she was not the only one who cared for him.

They spend the rest of the afternoon enjoying the animals. And Dick was glad he chose to go to the zoo as a family bonding experience. When Damian first came into the family he had taken him there, after discovering that his younger brother absolutely adored animals and he was happy to see that Marianne liked it as well.  

Efficient as always, Alfred was already there waiting for them the minute they crossed the exit of the building. As she came to know, the men seemed to have a six sense when it came to all of them. Just by his aura, she could tell he wasn’t someone you wanted to cross, but she could see how much he loved each one of his grandchildren (because she could never kid herself to think of him any less than a Grandfather).

“I assume that today's activities were enjoyable.” The butler asks as he opens the back door of the limo for them. Richard enters first thanking the men.

“It was acceptable” Damian voices, as he too enters the vehicle.  

It was a bit of a ride, seeing that the Manor was almost outside of Gotham, but she didn’t mind. Seated between Richard and Damian she spent most of the journey chatting with everyone. But by the time they arrived at the house everyone was a bit tired, so dinner was a relatively small affair. But not uneventful, because as revenge for Bruce bailing on family day, the boys started sharing with her all the shenanigans of her father’s public persona, Brucie Wayne. It was amusing to see this new side to her father, always so reserved and serious. 

“If you are all finished sharing Master Bruce's embarrassing moments, I believe it is time for patrol.”  Alfred as always came to defuse the situation before it could implode. 

Because she spent most of the last two years fighting almost every single day, she decided that she needed some rest from her hero lifestyle. Even after her father asked if she would like to accompany them on patrols, she decided to turn it down for now. So while her family directed themselves to the cave, she made her way into her suite. 

It was a beautiful room. Although the color scheme wasn’t something she would have picked herself, it fit with the furniture rather nicely, and her artist side appreciated that. The room itself was simple, but the red colors and the dark wood made the room seem cozier than it was. With a double bed with a canopy, two bedside tables, a vanity with a mirror, and a wardrobe, it had everything she needed. Her Father had encouraged her to decorate her room the way she wanted, and she had been tempted to do so, but ultimately decided to wait until she settled into her role as a family member before she went and added more change to the mix. What she had been very close to doing was adding a desk so she could draw and design, but after she discovered that there was a big one in the library just a few doors from her room, she dismissed the idea.  

Quickly she showered and changed into something more comfortable than her street attire, before exiting the room and making her way into the library. It wasn’t as big as the one downstairs, but it had a big balcony that overlooked the gardens, so she liked to just sit in a shadow and sketch away. Damian had been kind enough to spare one of his unused sketchbooks and some pencils, knowing that she liked to draw just as much as he did. She leaned forward into the railing resting her arms and head, but still looking upwards.

The sun had already set, and she was glad that they were far enough away from the city that she could see some stars in the sky. Having lived in Paris, she had really missed all the stars she could see at night from her home on the League. One of her studies had been about the Astros, so she spent a lot of time as a kid contemplating the skies. 

“It’s going to rain soon” A voice comes from behind her. Without having to turn around she knew who it was. A smile appears on her face.

“Aren’t you supposed to be getting ready for patrol?” She asks, straightening her body, but still not turning around. She could feel the person getting closer to her until she felt a presence at her side. 

“That’s the whole point. It's gonna rain.” He carries a hint of humor in his tone “And besides I prefer to keep you company, Pretty Girl. Besides, I believe Red Hood deserves one night off. The guy has been working hard.” He jokes.

With a smile she finally faces him. He had showered and changed, and without his red jacket, he looked so relaxed. It reminded her of their time in the League. Like that he looked so much like the angry boy she helped train. So young and while broken, so full of life and fight in him. He smirks at her but turns his face upwards to look at the night. 

“You always did love the stars.” He commented, not looking at her. “It’s sad that here you can't see them as much.” 

“It’s not that bad. In Paris, you couldn't see any. It was sad, but to be fair the whole city more than compensated for that. It’s beautiful there.” She recalled all the times she went on a midnight stroll around the city, just enjoying the architecture. “I could spend eternity drawing all the details in the buildings.” 

“Do you miss it?” He asks, looking at her. His tone is neutral, but by his body language, she can tell he’s anxious for her answer. She had always been good at reading him, and she was glad that their time apart had not changed that. 

“In a way…” 

She sighs.

“I liked the city, but I spent most of my time there fighting and training. Not much different from before. It was like everything changed but was still the same. To be completely honest… I miss our time at the League the most.” She confesses but hurriedly continues. “Don’t get me wrong, it was hard! But still… at the same time…”

“I get it.” He interrupts her. He has a small side smile, and the dimples on his face make her want to freeze this moment and draw him so she could eternalize him. Instead, she gets closer to him, seeking comfort in his presence at her side. He embraces her. Securing her in his arms, her body pressed against his, her head buried in his chest.

It was funny to think that the most capable woman to take care of herself he knew, chose to be vulnerable around him. It made him feel loved.

“I miss it too.” He whispered in her ear. She raises her head, just enough that she can see his face without removing herself from his arms. Staying like this reminds her of all the nights he used to sneak into her chambers. And they would talk and hold each other for hours. It felt like it was just yesterday the first time he got the better of her.

“Focus!” She yelled while landing a kick at his unprotected left side. “You are unbalanced- in three moves I could have you on the ground again” She punched him to his right, but he was able to block her and tried to deliver a punch of his own. His knuckles were bloodied, and he knew that in the morning his ribs would hurt. But at this moment he was high on adrenaline. She dodged. 

They were training for what felt like hours. But both were too stubborn to ask for the fight to end. 

But just as promised, in three more moves he was on the ground. He tried to get back on his feet to continue with the fight but was stopped by a foot on his torso.

“That’s enough.” She helps him to get on his feet. “You were great! You could have overpowered me so many times! I left you so many openings!” She laughs. This was routine for them. After a fight, Marianne was usually so pumped with adrenaline that she spoke at a mile per hour. “We really need to work on your tactics this week. Oh! You also need to improve your stance, you’ve been favoring your right side too much. I know your ribs hurt but you still need to protect your body as a whole.” She comments only stopping to take a large sip of water. “Well, I am spent.”

“You’re spent? I’m the one that has been eating dirt for the whole hour!” He complains indignantly. She tossed a water bottle in his direction, which he grabs and happily finishes in a single gulp.

“Just another reason you need to study more!” She grins. And turns to exit the room, and while walking to the door turns to him again. 

“See you in a bit” She winks. 

When they meet again they are in her room. She’s seated on the bed sketching some view, while Jason sits on the floor sharpening his knife. They chat casually for some time, but ultimately end speaking about their training session earlier. 

“That move would have totally worked!” He exclaims, knife long forgotten he now kneels facing her bed. 

“There’s where you are wrong, you need strength on your fist on both sides to push my torso, otherwise I would easily be able to doge only one. You need two punches at different sides in succession for you to distract your opponent!” She explains in a hurry. Her thoughts jumped around her head. 

“No way! If it’s strong enough, only one is needed!” He argues.

Worked up she threw her notebook to the side, forgotten. In a second she was up, signaling for him to do the same.

“There is no way. Stand there, pretend to be in stance.” She directs, and without a second thought, he complies. “Okay, so I come for your right side first, you are stronger there.” 

Her movements are slowed, as she demonstrates the move. “That’s going to distract you, and keep you focused on your stronger side, leaving your weaker one unprotected.” She shows him where he left an opening for her. “So all I need to do now is strike again, focusing more strength now. Either a punch or a kick would do the trick.” As she goes to demonstrate her point, he grabs the incoming slow punch and pulls her into his body. 

Unprepared she loses her balance, falling into his chest. In a second he secures her with his other arm, keeping her in his embrace. She feels her face burning with embarrassment. He caught her by surprise, and she felt ashamed.

“Hey that wasn't fai-” But he silences her, bringing his face closer to hers and giving her a heated kiss. It lasts for some time, but when they finally separate themselves he has a grin on his face.

“Just to be clear, I knew the move wouldn’t have worked. You just look cute when you're angry.” 

And before she can protest he shuts her up with another kiss.

So this is by far the biggest chapter! Hope ya’ll like it! We finally get the story behind Jason and Marianne. Let me know what you think!

Next

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[oikawaorbit]

The Brothers with an MC who can Tolerate Solomon’s Cooking: 

NOTES: The Brothers x GN ! MC

Lucifer:

Lucifer can be quite brutally honest sometimes, but he still attempts to maintain a respectful attitude towards Solomon’s abominations.

He’ll give you a quick warning

“Ah, Y/N.. that’s not a very wise decision.”

He loves you, but the more sadistic side of him just wants to see what will happen, especially since you’re so insistent.

Quite impressed when you have no reaction

“You must be some type of masochist, Y/N.”

Proud to have such a strong exchange student

Mammon:

As soon as Mammon saw you about to taste Solomon’s food, he immediately attempted to warn you.

“HEY, Y/N! Ya gotta listen, don’t try Solomon’s cookin! It’s awful!”

“Alright, fine. But don’t say I didn’t warn ya!”

Mammon watched in utter shock as you slipped the spoon in your mouth

And.. liked it..?

“It’s good, thanks Solomon!” You exclaim

His jaw drops in total awe

“Lucifer, send this human back to their realm!“

Leviathan:

“Ugh, Y/N! You really shouldn’t even bother with Solomon and his cooking.”

Last time he ate one of Solomon’s meals he spent the night hunched over the toilet

His Otaku diet didn’t mix very well with Solomon’s abomination

“Is this really what normies go through for the sake of being polite?” He thought

“This human is too powerful, being able to tolerate Solomon’s cooking so absentmindedly.”

Satan:

As soon as Solomon offers his food Satan attempts to make up some type of excuse. 

But since you were dead set on your desire to try Solomon’s cooking, he decided he couldn’t just let you suffer alone

He just doesn’t get it

How?

He sighed. “Y/N, You must be insane..”

Asmodeus:

“Y/N, SWEETIE, NO!” 

He tries to slap the food out of your hand, but alas.

He is too late.

Deadass about to decide what color coffin you would want before he notices that you’re not reacting

At least, not badly. 

After becoming the only one that possesses the ability to tolerate Solomon’s atrocious concoctions, you become Solomon’s favorite! He’s just all over you now.

Knocking Asmo down a place..

And honestly, he doesn’t care. Nor is he willing to earn his spot back. 

He can handle not being first place in someone’s heart just this once.

Beelzebub:

Solomon’s cooking is so horrible that even Beel, The avatar of gluttony, avoids eating it at all costs.

So when he sees you about to try a dish that Solomon had made, he obviously has to warn you.

When he sees you finish the whole meal Solomon had prepared

There’s no way you could’ve actually liked it, right? 

You must have been pretending so that you wouldn’t hurt Solomon’s feelings.

For that reason, you’ve earned his utmost respect.

Belphegor:

“Pfftt… you’re gonna eat Solomon’s cooking..? Alright, but don’t blame me if you end up in the Hospital.” Belphie replied with a disapproving expression.

And wow

He did not expect you to be so tolerant.

You ain’t gettin no kisses from him anymore, nuh uh

Not after what you just ate

#obey me headcannons #obey me x reader #obey me x gn!reader #obey me x gn reader #obey me fanfic #obey me lucifer #obey me leviathan #obey me mammon #obey me satan #obey me belphie #obey me belphegor #obey me beel #obey me beelzebub #obey me asmodeus #obey me asmo #obey me asmodeus x reader #obey me lucifer x reader #obey me mammon x reader #obey me levi #obey me levi x reader #obey me headcannon #obey me headcanons #obey me solmare #obey me shall we date