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hockeywhy · 3 years

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caught in the middle (1); m. barzal

SYNOPSIS: For the sake of your friend’s wedding with Tito, you and Mat agree to maintain the facade of still being the happy couple everyone sees you as. But the act comes with its consequences, one more taxing than the other. WARNINGS: language. WORD COUNT: 11.2k A/N: I am so excited for this because it contains some of the tropes I enjoy seeing in fics, and I was dying to also put out some new content as opposed to only reposting my old writing. I wish I wrote this when I was still decent at doing the thing, but I hope that this is still an enjoyable read that makes you look forward to the next part! Title is based off Alexander 23′s Caught in the Middle which is such a good song and I really recommend. Sections in italics represent flashbacks.

PART 2 | PART 3 | PART 4

“We’re getting married!”

You gasped, bringing both hands to cover the lower half of your face as your jaw dropped at the announcement. It shouldn’t be so surprising – you would’ve bet even your most prized possession that this was bound to happen at some point eventually – but knowing this was actually now a sure thing sent a thrill through you. It didn’t take long for the shock to wear off and in place of it, your expression mirrored that of your best friend’s: the wide grin, the bright eyes and of course, the giggles of sheer excitement as soon as the news sunk in. Elise was glowing and next to her, Tito embodied the idea of what the world’s proudest man would look like.

“Oh my god!” you gasped, and Elise burst into laughter, not hesitating to jump out of her seat at the same time you did so that the two of you could embrace. Among your squeals and giggles, you could faintly make out the sound of hands being clapped, then caught sight of Mat and Tito hugging. Over Elise’s shoulder and over Tito’s, you and Mat exchanged smiles and you couldn’t help the chuckle that left your mouth as soon as he winked at you. “Congratulations!” you said as soon as you broke apart, though the two of you still held hands. Immediately, your gaze fell down to her hand where a ring now rested, and you couldn’t help but wonder how you hadn’t taken notice of it earlier. “Just—when? How? Where? Who else knows?”

“We don’t have a date or venue set yet, but we wanted you and Mat to be the first to know,” Elise informed you as soon as you took your seats again.

“We have a favour to ask from both of you,” Tito supplied. As soon as he said it, you felt Mat’s hand wrap around your own and the two of you exchanged a brief look during which he squeezed your hand gently, before diverting your attentions back to the soon-to-be newlyweds.

Newlyweds. The immensity of the word sent a discrete shiver down your spine.

“I can’t imagine asking this of anyone else: I want you to be my best man,” Tito directed at Mat.

“You shouldn’t even think of asking this of anyone else,” Mat responded immediately, and the two shook hands on it. You couldn’t help but think that if they weren’t as comfortable as they were now, they’d probably hug again, do their typical pats on the back or fist bump as they usually did, but Elise’s head now rested on Tito’s shoulder and Mat’s hand was so warm, so firm atop your own.

“Be my maid of honour, please?” Elise asked. “I can’t think of anyone more suitable than you and Mat as best man and maid of honour. We’ll return the favour of course,” she added playfully.

“I’ll hold you to that,” you warned without hesitating because after all, you had no reason to – and you knew Mat would agree with you.

Although the two of you hadn’t touched on the subject yet, there was an unvoiced knowledge shared between you that eventually, this would also be you. Eventually, Mat would ask you and your heart would grow and your soul would warm, and you would say yes. Yes, yes, yes.

As you all settled down to hear a replay of how Tito popped the question and Elise accepted the ring, Mat’s thumb began caressing the back of your hand. Though the gesture wasn’t a novelty, you couldn’t help but take notice of the way your heart fluttered each time he seemed to linger more on your ring finger. It wasn’t difficult to imagine a ring wrapped around it but neither of you were in a rush: you simply waited for the right time to take your relationship to a point in which it would become a forever thing, fully confident it wasn’t a question of ‘if’ but rather, ‘when’.

This was anything but the right time.

You frown as you cast a glance down at the phone resting on your lap, eyes narrowing a little at the name which brought the display to life for the second time in the space of less than a minute. You click the side button twice, silencing the vibrations of it and from your side, your colleague leans in to whisper to you.

“You can take it if it’s urgent. I’ll fill you in afterwards.”

“Thanks,” you whisper back. “I think it can wait until the meeting wraps up though.”

Luke gives you a well, if you’re sure look as he leaned back in his chair and you flash him a grateful smile.

Still, it is difficult for you to settle comfortably in your seat again and much to your chagrin, you find yourself crossing and uncrossing your legs as if the call had sent some sort of signal to your entire body kickstarting jitteriness you can honestly do without. Not long after you find some comfort and energy to draw yourself back to the present, your phone buzzes again – only once this time, indicating a message.

I’m waiting for you in the lobby.

Fuck, you curse inwardly, locking the phone in frustration. As quietly as you can, you gather your notebook and work tablet then lean in towards Luke who met you halfway. “Have to run but let me know if I miss anything important.”

“At the current rate, I wouldn’t count much on it but will do anyway,” he states as quietly as he can and the two of you exchange sly, conspiratorial smiles before you excuse yourself quickly and very quietly while making a swift exit.

Internally, a string of curses follow without a break in between, and you have to physically bite down on your lip out of sheer fear one might unconsciously slip out. If anyone would be in your shoes, though, they wouldn’t blame you for it. You are the type of person to stick closely to any plans and agreements made, so the fact that he just chose to turn up so unexpectedly doesn’t sit right with you. Not anymore, that is. Besides, you had both agreed to do this after your workday ended as opposed to midday and definitely not in this place. Now, you have to brace yourself for coping with a foul mood on top of whatever else the rest of the day would throw at you.

“You’ve got a visitor,” Rachel announces quietly in a sing-song voice from behind the reception desk as you approach. She doesn’t bother masking the giddiness in her tone and you struggle to work up as genuine of a smile as you can when she nods her head towards the waiting area.

“Thanks, Rach.”

“Bet he must be so happy your redeployment to the Baltimore offices was cut short so quickly,” she coos.

“Sure is. We’re still on for tonight?” you ask quickly in an attempt to drive attention away from the subject before she can try to lead into it too far for your own comfort at the moment.

Rachel’s smile falters a little, her expression somewhat quizzical. “Don’t you want to postpone so you could spend some time with him? You only just got back yesterday, after all.”

You swallow uncomfortably before shrugging. “We’ve got plenty of time to do that. So tonight, okay? I’ll catch you later.”

“Your call. See you then, Y/N!”

You only had just a split second to brace yourself for what is ahead of you, so you draw in a breath then slowly exhale it as discreetly as you can while cutting your way across the lobby. Since agreeing to this meeting, you prepared yourself as best as you could, imagining every single scenario and devising the appropriate plan for it: from the way you presented yourself to what you said, you had a mental plan for everything including a few backups just in case. The only thing you hadn’t factored in, apparently, was how little was under your control and you hated that. Each step you take made you feel less and less prepared for what is ahead, and the thought rattles you. If you were swift enough on your feet, you could just about make a quick turn and dip into the hallway leading to the visitor restrooms. All you need is just a few more seconds. A little alone time for you to run over your lines in your head.

Except—

Mat looks up at the same time you take a step sideways, ready to bolt towards temporary safety. His eyebrows rise a little as if surprised by the sight of you, but you refuse to appear outwardly deflated by the turn of events. Instead, you square your shoulders, tip your head back a little and arch an eyebrow. You can do this. You note he is dressed casually, and his hair is pushed back underneath a black cap.

Unless there was a change in schedule, Thursdays were scrimmage days.

Your jaw clenches ever so slightly as you recall that with so much ease. Then again, you basically built up a collection of information that was practically helpful or useful to exactly no one over the course of the past few years. It’ll probably take just as much or maybe more to replace that with something different, so you try cutting yourself some slack whenever you are willing to.

“I thought we agreed on five thirty,” you state coolly, pitching your voice at just the right tone to also express surprise.

Mat pushes up from the armchair, returning whatever magazine he’d picked up back on the nearby glass table. “Sorry, I tried calling earlier this morning to ask if we can reschedule but it went straight to voicemail.”

Oh. You mentally curse yourself for not charging your phone as soon as you made it home from the airport the previous night or bothering to check the voicemail message you’d been notified of once it did begin charging earlier this morning at your desk.

“They rescheduled the viewing of the new arena for this evening, and I was in the area, so I thought I’ll drop by just in case,” Mat continues, throwing a cursory glance around the place though to you, it seemed more like a way of having a break from the eye contact. You don’t complain; you welcome that.

You open your mouth, ready to berate his poor timing but even you could admit you carry some fault here too. Only a little. You bite down lightly on the tip of your tongue, before nodding towards the seats though you didn’t wait for Mat; you sit, deciding he could make up his own mind if he wanted to follow or not.

“How was Baltimore?” he asks after a few moments of awkward silence while settling in the same armchair he previously occupied.

“Mat,” you say, hoping it comes across as more of a warning than a plea. You can’t deal with small talk and a part of you thinks that’d make the entire deal even more difficult to go through with. He presses his lips together into a thin line and you take that as your sign to continue. “Elise told me she’d like us to be at the venue a day in advance of the rehearsal dinner if we can. I’ve already arranged my leave for that, so it’s not a problem for me. I’m planning on making my way there sometime tomorrow afternoon.”

“We can go together then. I can pick you up after work.”

“There’s no need—”

“Y/N.” The sharpness of his tone catches you off guard and you can swear Mat was equally surprised by that, though only for the briefest of moments. He slides forward a little in the seat almost as if he is more than ready to leave but Mat has never been one to back down so easily and you doubt any of that changed during the course of the past three months or so. “You were the one who insisted we go through with this and I’m trying. I really am, but you’re not giving me anything to work with. So please. Let’s just put everything to the side, do what we need to do and then it’s done.”

Done. Like it is a task, like it is something you needed to cross off a to-do list, scrunch it up then trash it.

The finality of the word is so heavy that it feels as if it had managed to knock out all the air in your lungs. You and Mat were running headfirst towards a fork in the road, and deep down you knew that was truly it. If until now the two of you have been dancing around each other, playing pretend as if you were kids living in a world of fantasy, you know that eventually, you have to let light shine on the truth: whatever lay ahead, you and Mat could no longer walk the same paths. It is just a matter of admitting it not only to yourselves, but also to the people you were lying to.

Lying for, you prefer.

Defeated, you slump in your own seat a little, legs crossing and fingers tapping lightly against the back of your notebook. “Be at my place by two. I’ll have everything that I need ready the night before so we won’t need to wait around.” A pause, and then, “how’s Tito?”

Mat lifts a shoulder in a casual shrug. “Excited. Nervous. It’s the only thing he talks about in the locker, outside of it, on ice and off ice. How’s Elise?”

“Same deal with her. I never knew there were so many shades of blue before, but I’ve been proven wrong before.”

A pause follows that could easily be attributed to the group of people rushing into the building and allowing noise from the street outside to filter in while the doors were kept open, but you can tell there is more to it than that if you are to go by the shift in Mat’s expression. His expression changes and you find you can’t quite read into it or guess what could be going on through his head. You try not to focus much on the little voice inside your mind that was bothered by it but find it takes a considerable amount of effort to do so. Force of habit, you conclude.

“You don’t say,” Mat finally responds. There is a hint of accusation in his tone. Or regret. Maybe both.

Your lips press together firmly, a light frown forming on your face but chose to let that slide. Not only is the lobby of your workplace the least suitable place to have an argument about the two of you, but you find that even those short moments of seeing Mat face to face months after you called it quits appears to take a toll on you. You feel tired, worn out and willing to be the first one to back down for once.

It is cruel irony that a big red neon EXIT sign is visible from the corner of your eye.

You release a quiet, long sigh then stand up from the seat. “Well, I guess we’re done here? I do have another meeting to prepare for, so…” You trail off, already backing away a few steps.

Mat opens his mouth as if ready to say something else but promptly presses his lips together, deciding against it. He gives a swift nod of his head then stands up. It’s then you notice the two Styrofoam cups in front of him and the neon EXIT sign imprinted in your mind starts flashing temptingly at you. Mat is a step ahead. He holds out one of the cups towards you and you are ready to tell him off for it, but he cut in.

“Thought I wouldn’t drop by empty handed.” When you don’t make a move to accept it, his eyes briefly peek behind you. “Rachel’s all eyes this way, by the way,” he informs you and a brief glance over your shoulder confirms Mat hasn’t been lying.

As soon as you turn to look towards the reception desk, Rachel grins, waves quickly at you then turns back to her computer screen. Begrudgingly, you accept the cup of coffee and force a tight smile.

“See you soon,” you say by way of greeting and didn’t wait to hear a response from Mat.

It isn’t until you scan your pass to cross the security barriers and make a turn out of sight that you take a sip from the drink and almost immediately wish you didn’t. It’s your order to a T. The two of you even brought a coffee machine that would let you replicate it on days when you didn’t feel like leaving the comforts of your apartment, especially days when Mat didn’t need to get up early for practices or scrimmages or evening games. It stayed with Mat when you left and the memory left a bitter taste in your mouth, despite the gentle sweetness of the beverage.

Without thinking twice, you throw the cup in the nearest trash can.

As soon as your order is set on the table, you ignore the basket of fries and reach straight for your glass to take a long sip from the straw, letting out a content sigh as soon as you felt satiated enough.

“Long day,” you state in response to Rachel’s raised eyebrows but she seems to accept that by raising her own glass. You clink yours against hers, take a smaller sip then set it back down on the table. “What time do you think you’ll make it over to the hotel?”

“Well, I was thinking of trying to get there by midday on the day of the rehearsal dinner but it’s starting to look more like late afternoon. I’m…” She trails off, and you can just about pick up on her hesitation and the way her gaze shifts over to the side momentarily as if avoiding something or considering whether to continue that. You move in your seat, peeling your back away from the plush backrest to lean in a little closer.

“You’re…” you trail off, voice peaking just a little into a question in an attempt to prompt her to continue.

Rachel takes a deep breath in, shoulders visibly drooping and when she looked back at you, she did so with a look that could only reflect…shame? Embarrassment?

“Luke and I are sort of thinking of coming along together.” At the sight of your widened eyes, she quickly adds, “just as friends! We’re still working out through a few things and we’re taking it slow. As in, much, much slower than the first time around.”

“No way! That’s… Rach, that’s so good. I’m happy for you both, seriously.”

You find that you truly believed that, though it wasn’t a surprise to you. You had introduced Rachel to Luke while she visited you in Baltimore and at the time, he worked with you there also. Initially, you didn’t think much of it - you simply invited her to come along to a few after work drinks and the two kicked it off easily that night. Very easily apparently, because as the night started coming to an end, Rachel prompted you to go ahead without her. Ready to say you weren’t going to leave her own her own, you shortly found out exactly why: you watched with plenty of amusement and fascination as she and Luke climbed into a taxi together and whizzed off to his place, undoubtedly. That was pretty much their start and continuation. Her visits to Baltimore were more frequent and though you were seeing her often enough, it definitely wasn’t as much as Luke saw of her. And you were fine with that. They fit almost perfectly and it only took a few more meetings for them to label themselves as a couple.

Things began crumbling as soon as Luke had moved to the New York office just a few weeks before your own return. While he seemed fine with the idea of Rachel working in the same place, that wasn’t also her take on things.

“It’s weird,” she told you through the phone. “It just… It’s so weird. I’d be seeing him at my place or his and in the office? No thanks. That’s way too much for me, you know?”

It made sense, of course, and though you rooted for them, you didn’t want to push her into something she wasn’t comfortable with. Yet, there was a tremble to her voice, a sort of uncertainty that made you think otherwise. It wasn’t that Rachel didn’t have any feelings for him - maybe she was simply shocked to see him walk through those glass doors one morning to pick up his brand new ID and claim what would soon become his permanent desk across from yours.

“Thanks,” she tells you, pulling you back into the present. “But like I said, slow and easy does it. We’ve been talking more and that makes a huge difference.”

“For sure. If communication isn’t the backbone of a relationship, I don’t know what is,” you agree and wasn’t that ironic? You’re hardly in the position of giving any relationship advice at all or saying what is good for one and what isn’t. Not anymore. Not when your own had fallen apart.

Rachel grins. “You’d know. You and Mat have been together for… how long now?”

You should’ve seen it coming a mile away. You swallow uncomfortably, take another sip of your drink and take a few fries just to buy yourself a little more time. “Maybe four years? Don’t really keep track of that anymore,” you said as casually as you could muster, lifting your shoulders in a shrug.

“I think I’d stop doing that eventually too at the rate you two are going. Honestly, I would’ve bet anything you would’ve been the first to tie the knot. Actually, thinking about it,” she says, clicking her fingers in recollection, “Elise said the same thing to me the other day when we caught up on the phone. She went—“

You don’t really register her words. There is a low ringing in your ears and an uncomfortable draft sweeps in the locale as the entrance door somewhere behind you is being kept open, no doubt a large group making their way in; it sends shivers down your body, but really, you are pretty sure you can’t only attribute them to a brief gust of wind. After all, your sweater is keeping you sufficiently cosy and warm. In front of you, Rachel continues praising your relationship with Mat, talking about how anyone took a look at you both and would say, whatever they have going, I want it too and you are trying so, so hard to block out as much as you can of it. You can stop her, of course; distract her with whatever random topic and you know she’d go with it but your jaw is locked in place, teeth clenched uncomfortably. You blame that and the way your nails dig into the palms of your hands on the sting behind your eyes and the sudden heaviness weighting down on your chest.

It isn’t so much the pain of your relationship ending that was rendering you in a state of daze, but the shame of what you and Mat agreed to do: pretend the two of you were still the happy couple Elise, Tito and everyone else thought of you as just to not spoil whatever luck they thought you’d be passing on to them by being their main witnesses. And then, once the event passes and they would return to New York from the honeymoon you and Mat would soon gift to them on their wedding day, you’d tell them the truth. Or part of it anyway. Definitely no mentions that the two of you were childish enough to play pretend; just a simple, clean break timed just perfectly with your request to be permanently redeployed elsewhere. Preferably, as far from New York City as possible so that you no longer have to walk the streets you once both did or yearn to once again visit that perfect pie place the two of you once dubbed your own.

“We’re not together anymore.”

The words stumble out of your mouth in a desperate now or never manner. Despite the anxiousness that came with the act, you find relief in it also. It feels freeing to be able to admit the truth to someone that isn’t only yourself though perhaps you should’ve thought of this more carefully: the idea of now needing to come fully clean to Rachel is somewhat daunting, mostly because of what she might say in response to the front you and Mat are trying to uphold. But for the first time in what feels like too long, you no longer feel like a fraud; like a person lying to everyone around them.

“Wait.” Rachel frowns, and it was obvious she doesn’t quite know what to do with that information or how to best process it. Her head tilts a little, palm idly rubbing against the side of her neck so you take the initiative to come across as unbothered by this as possible by leaning into the seat, legs crossing as you fiddled with the drink’s straw. “What? I’m confused. Didn’t Mat just drop by earlier? You two seemed okay. He was…fine when he came in. We didn’t talk much, sure, but he was all smiley and just…normal.”

You laugh quietly and shortly. “It’s been a while now. Maybe two or three weeks before I left for Baltimore, I think. It’d be pretty worrying if he was still hung up about it. After all, we both agreed on it. And this,” you add, a little more disheartened and embarrassed. “This…thing we’re doing. We promised Tito and Elise we’ll be there for them on their big day and we will. But they had this… I guess, idea of us being an ideal couple. Whatever that is,” you continue more quietly and with a roll of your eyes. “He wanted to tell Tito, but I didn’t want to spoil Elise’s day, you know? So he agreed. Took some convincing because it feels so… Gosh, it sounds so stupid, doesn’t it? Pretending we’re still together just to spread some fake cheer around.”

“Oh, honey…” Rachel whispers and you read the sympathy in her voice. Not that she makes it particularly difficult to take note of. “But… I thought everything was okay. Actually, way more than okay. Perfect, even. What…uh—“ She trailed off awkwardly, but you could easily fill in that gap.

What happened?

You bring the beverage to your mouth, this time drinking from the glass directly as opposed to using the straw. The mixer stings your throat this time around but the small ice cube you take into your mouth numbs it away pretty quickly. Slowly, you chew it to small pieces and speak only when you finish it.

“I thought long and hard about this the first few weeks after we called it quits,” you admit. “We always talked about what bothered us or if there was something on our mind, but at one point we just… We stopped wanting to compromise. When I was put forward for Baltimore, it was going to be a permanent thing. Mat was happy, sure, but I could tell he wasn’t being entirely honest with me, you know? When I called him out on it, he asked me well what about us? And I said we’d be fine. Baltimore isn’t a different continent. It’s not even a different timezone. He could come over when he had free time and if he didn’t, I’d always spend weekends in New York anyway. It’s Baltimore, Rach. Not fucking San Francisco or whatever. Eventually, he told me exactly what was on his mind: he couldn’t do long distance. Not even for a short period of time while I figured out if Baltimore is really what I wanted. Isn’t it a bit hypocritical, though?” You question, but it’s clear Rachel feels a bit awkward about giving her take on it right now, so you make it easier for her by responding to your own question. “I felt lonely too when he was on the road. I was worried he’d find someone different, someone much better while away. He never gave me a reason to doubt him, but a small part of me still thought what if. This happened right before he was on the road again, actually. We didn’t call, barely even texted those weeks and then when he returned, we decided it’d be best to break up. Didn’t take us a long discussion to get to that conclusion because at that point, it just… I don’t know. It felt like we didn’t have much to say to each other.”

Rachel presses her lips together, the frown still on her face and hesitantly, she asks, “who said it first?”

“I did,” you respond without hesitating. “He wanted a break while we work it all out but come on, Rach, a break? Look me in the eyes and tell me people really believe in breaks and they come back to each other as if nothing happened.”

“I mean…” she trails off, pointing at herself by way of explanation. “Look at me and Luke, I guess.”

You shake your head. “Nope. Not the same thing, trust me. This was for the best, Rach. It’s much neater to call it quits. That way, neither of us will feel obliged to hold back if life puts something different ahead of us.” You pause for a moment, teeth biting into your lower lip. “They said they’ll always have me back there if I decide on it, so who knows. Once I wrap up the project their called me back for, I might just take them up on it. Not quite a promotion, but it’ll be a good sidestep and maybe a change of scenery is what I need.”

“And do you think it’s good? What the two of you are doing right now?” Rachel questions, not at all deterred by your weak attempt at trying to divert conversation to a more work related topic. “And I don’t mean it just for Elise and Tito’s wedding, but for you and Mat generally speaking. I mean… the two of you have been together for a pretty long time. Doesn’t it… Isn’t it odd?”

“It’s not normal, that’s for sure,” you confirm. “But it’d be weirder for everyone if we were to tell them we’re no longer together given we’ve been asked to do what we need to do. Rach, promise me this stays between us, okay? Promise. I know how it sounds, I know how it’ll look but trust me on this, okay?”

She fixes you with a sceptical stare, a look that holds yet more questions than certainty but eventually, she nods her head and relief washes over you at the gesture. “I’m sorry it happened, Y/N,” she offers, voice warm and sympathetic as she places a hand on the table palm up. “And I’m sorry you went through it alone.”

You smile softly and reach for it, returning the squeeze she gives you. There is comfort in the gesture, comfort in her words and you find yourself rooting for it, so grateful to have received it. “The worst part is over, but thank you, Rachel. “It means a lot.”

“Feel like carpooling with Luke and I?”

“I’m good,” you assure as you both relax back into your seats. “Elise wants us there the day before the rehearsal. I guess just to have some familiar faces around that aren’t just wedding planners, so Mat and I agreed to go together tomorrow. Promise I won’t lose my shit if our song plays on the radio,” you add jokingly and find yourself laughing along with Rachel.

“What song’s that?”

Too many, you think, although one in particular stands out to you. “Brett Young’s In Case You Didn’t Know.”

A tray containing an assortment of dishes is set on the table and shortly after, an ice cold pitch of sangria accompanies that. Eager to cool down, you reach for one of the empty glasses to pour yourself a drink but Mat’s quicker. He takes them both, filling your glass first before his own. You laugh to yourself and Mat grins at that, briefly looking towards you as he fills his glass. You’re about to take a sip, eager to both quench your thirst and cool down but Mat takes the initiative of initiating a toast by raising his glass a little, elbow resting on the table.

“What’re we toasting for tonight?” You ask, imitating his pose by leaning forward a little. “To our first holiday together? To how perfect the weather’s been so far? To how I mastered paddle boarding way before you did?”

Mat laughs, lowering his head as he did so but when he looked back up at you, he clinked his glass against yours and held it there. “To all of that. To one of the many, many holidays we’ll have together. To this moment right here, to us, to you.” He pauses and the strobe lights of the bar switch from dark blue to hot pink, and the way Mat stares at you in this moment makes your heart race inexplicably. “To how much I love you.”

He takes your breath away. Draws it right out of your lungs and you feel heady. It’s the first summer with Mat, the first I love you from him and it suddenly feels as if this bar is too small for the both of you. You love him, and he loves you too and the only thing you could imagine doing is jumping in his arms but there’s a table between you and sangria topped wine glasses in your hands, and he’s wearing a pristine white shirt that looks incredible against his tanned skinned and there’s a lot of people around (the majority significantly older than both your age and Mat’s combined) so you simply grin and carefully lean forward more, pressing a kiss to his mouth.

“I love you,” you murmur against his lips and even if your voice is low compared to the loud, cheesy country music blasting through hidden stereos, you know Mat catches on to that.

“I love you,” he says right back and before you pull away, he bumps his nose against yours gently, making you giggle.

You both take a sip of your drinks and you smack your lips together, content with the turn of the night.

You and Mat had been dating for a few months, but this was the first time the two of you will spend back to back nights and days together without needing to rush somewhere. Of course, a part of you was anxious about it - while it was easy to spend a few hours together now and then, maybe even the odd night together, it was entirely different being together pretty much all the time. There were habits and quirks you each had that might get in the way, but your worries were soon put to rest. You and Mat had wonderful chemistry together, easily able to spend your time together but also still enjoy each other’s company while doing separate activities. You didn’t want to rush into things and you made no move to do so, but it was ever so easy to imagine what living with Mat would be like. And sure, you were well aware of the fact that it wouldn’t always be sunshine and rainbows; the two of you would eventually transition out of this honeymoon-type period of your relationship, but something told you life would Mat would never bore you. It’d never make you wish for anything different.

“Give me a second,” Mat says and before you could ask him what he meant, he’s out of his seat and you follow him across the bar, a little confused.

He makes his way past the bar, past the pool tables and stops in front of what is undoubtedly a jukebox. Curious, you arch an eyebrow and watch as he fiddles with finding the right amount of change before inserting the coins in the slot. It takes him a while before he finds whatever song it is he wants and it takes enough time for him to make it back to your table before the jukebox and sound system registers the request. You don’t recognise the first few notes at all, much less the accompanying guitar strings but you don’t have time to search your memory for a title.

Mat stops by your side, holding a hand out to you. “Dance with me.” It’s more statement than question and under any circumstances, you may have felt a little awkward about doing this, but it’s the heat of the moment and your giddiness that pushes you to your feet, hand in Mat’s.

The two of you are beaten to an emptier area in the establishment by two other much older couples that were closer to it anyway, and you find that gives you a bit more of a boost also. Mat pulls you to him, wrapping one arm around your waist while holding on to your free hand while you hold on to his shoulder with the other. Your fingers lightly clench and unclench the soft material of his shirt, lowering your head a little and you smile against the back of your hand. It’s so painfully cheesy and there’s nowhere near enough other people dancing along to the song but you love it much more than you thought you ever would.

“Know what I’d invest all my money into?” He asks you suddenly.

You pull back a little, still swaying along with the song. “Cryptocurrency seems like a safe bet right now.”

Mat laughs, that big hearty laugh of his that makes your smile wider and when it passes, he presses a chaste kiss on your forehead. “Well, I’m glad one of us has a good head on their shoulders, but no.” He shakes his head, then laughs again, shorter and quieter as if recalling your response. “A time machine. I want to stop time right here and right now so that we can be as we are for a little while longer.”

“Cheesy,” you joke, despite the warmth coursing across your entire body and the jelly-like feeling forming in your knees. “But perfectly understandable.”

“Eventually, we wouldn’t need it, but it’d be nice to have one for tonight.”

“Eventually? How so?” You question, then narrow your eyes a little, the gesture playful. “You plan on getting bored of me and breaking up?”

“What!” He exclaims and pulls you in just that much closer. He lets go of your hand only so he could bring his to your chin, tipping your head back a little. “Never,” kiss, “say that,” kiss, “again.” The final kiss you share with him is a little longer and you take the liberty of bringing your hand to his chest, palm pressing against it to feel the thump of his heart against his ribcage momentarily. Then, slowly, you graze the tips of your nails along his exposed collarbone and peck his lips once more before pulling away. It’s then that the song’s name and artist comes to your mind, almost as an afterthought. From hidden speakers, Brett Young declares I couldn’t live life without you and Mat gives you a pointed stare. “Damn, he said it before I could.”

“It’s the thought that counts,” you assure him. “Either way, I think I prefer hearing it from you, Barzal.”

“I’m pretty sure I couldn’t live without you,” he recites and wraps his arms around you, pulling you into a hug. He sways you both in a more exaggerated manner that makes you cling to him more out of habit than necessity. You’ve known you’d trust Mat with anything, but each day, he seems to do something that makes that thought solidify more and more in your mind. The comfort and safety that brings wraps around you like a warm blanket.

Be it the hot weather, the somewhat stifling interior of the bar, the sips of sangria on an empty stomach, the euphoria of the moment or all things combined, you nod quickly. And from somewhere in the depths of your mind, the very bottom of your heart, you respond with, “I can get used to this day after day. So don’t let me go, baby.”

“Wouldn’t dream of it,” he whispers, tone full of care and love and warmth. He gives you his promise without hesitation and you know it’s bound to stick.

Your phone buzzes once.

I’m downstairs. Need help with your bags?

You push up from the comfort of your couch and make one last round of your apartment to make sure you had everything you definitely needed from where it was placed.

I’m good. Will be down in a minute, you text back but don’t pocket your phone right away. Instead, you stare at the screen for a little while longer, half tempted to scroll through the thread of messages. They’d provide a stark timeline of when things started going wrong and you would probably be able to see exactly how things changed between the two of you from the moment you suggested a mere break wouldn’t do it. But doing that would be like breaking a streak you had going for sufficient time to earn a pat on your back. The journey of getting to a point where you were sufficiently okay with being in Mat’s presence without any other company was a long one and the last thing you needed was to recall how it once was.

You and Mat started out as friends after Elise introduced the two of you just a short while before he started his professional career with the Islanders. She talked about how the two of them met in school and how great of a guy he was; real down to earth, funny and incredibly ambitious - traits she also assigned to you, and therefore thought the two of you would get along great. She wasn’t wrong about it. You knew a little about hockey, going to games every now and then mostly whenever Elise dragged you along but you found that Mat made the game more enjoyable. He explained it to you in a manner that didn’t make you feel belittled or as if it should be something you already knew of, and didn’t mind explaining some things more than once. On the other hand, you introduced him to your own hobbies and the little world you created for yourself in a city as big and busy as New York. You showed him the more lowkey but homely establishments, including your favourite pizza place that - unbeknown to you at the time - would become yours and his, and even took him to a few student bars where you regularly beat him at pool while he showed off at darts. Occasionally, it felt weird to watch him unwind in such…normal places and ways while on other days, he shone on ice and was easily one of the best rookies emerging from one of the country’s most well known sports leagues. Yet despite that, you found that athlete Mat wasn’t all that different from Mat the person.

He never put a front and his genuine manner was refreshing to you, particularly during a time when you were still a college student and a good portion of the guys around were textbook frat boys. Being around Mat was comfortable and safe. You didn’t feel the need to speak a certain way or be a different person, and retrospectively, the way you felt towards him developed almost organically. You felt yourself gravitating towards him and were pleasantly surprised by the moments when he’d seek you out first. A day off here and a day off there until eventually, you found yourself spending much of your free time with him and vice-versa.

Falling in love with Mat was easy. Being without Mat was difficult. But, thankfully, not impossible apparently.

Convinced you packed everything you needed, made your way out with a duffle bag on your shoulder and a suitcase at your heels.

True to his word, Mat was parked in front of your place and as soon as you pushed open the building’s door, he looked up from his phone and made his way over to you. The last thing you needed was to make the journey any more awkward or difficult for the both of you, so you didn’t argue when he took the bags from you to stow them away in the trunk.

“Are you going across the country?” You ask, peeking into the trunk while he plays Tetris with the bags.

“What?” He questions, evidently distracted by the task at hand but straightens up when you delicately place a hand on his arm, pushing him to the side a little.

“You’d think you’re going across the country for like, two or three weeks rather than a couple of days,” you repeat. “Maybe put that smaller bag sideways? That might let the bigger suitcase fit.”

He follows your guidance and sure enough, that does the trick: the suitcases fit perfectly in the trunk and you grin to yourself, triumphant.

Mat steps back, closing the trunk and brushes his hands together. “Thanks,” he says and you nod, heading towards your seat in the front. He follows you inside just as you click in your seatbelt. “I don’t think it’ll take us more than two or three hours to get there if traffic’s as good as it was when I checked it a little while earlier. Got everything?”

“Everything important that is. Everything else, I’ll just worry about and pull my hair out when we get there,” you tell him and you can’t help feeling proud for being able to keep conversation light and as normal as you can.

After all, you’ve known life before Mat and you’re rediscovering it after him too.

Mat laughs ever so quiet, and from the corner of your eye, you catch him brushing his hand across his mouth though he’s a few seconds too slow in trying to mask his smile.

“I think I’ll need to fill up soon, but let me know if there’s anywhere else you want to stop along the way,” he tells you while pulling out of the parking spot.

You nod even if he probably might not see it and take the liberty to scroll through radio stations. Mat doesn’t seem to be against it, so you continue switching to them until, a little frustrating that nothing seems to work for you, you connect your phone to the car and play one of your playlists. A mix of upbeat pop and an assortment of viral tracks fill in the silence for a while, and the act of singing along in your head takes your mind away from how it almost feels as if you’re sitting on needles. It takes a conscious effort on your behalf to remind yourself to loosen your shoulders and stop fiddling too much with your hands, and you’re glad Mat seems to be plenty preoccupied with driving. Once upon a time, he would’ve immediately picked up on even the most mild of your discomforts and tried to do anything he could to alleviate them. You don’t know how much, if at all, Mat changed during the time you spent apart but you want to think that you no longer wear your heart on your sleeve as much and your emotions are much more guarded, especially in his presence.

Apparently, though, there’s only so much he can take with silence filled in by music because once he’s off busier streets, he leans in his seat more comfortably and you can tell he very briefly turns his head towards you. “Think they’ll like their wedding gift?”

You direct your gaze away from the flashing scenery outside to Mat. “Absolutely. Who wouldn’t like it? Trust me when I say Bali’s been a place Elise always wanted to visit and I can’t think of a better time than now,” you assure him.

“If they don’t, it’s on you,” he says and it takes you a beat longer to realise he’s just joking so you huff out a laugh, relaxing back in the seat.

“If they don’t, they can give one of the tickets to me and I’ll happily go there.” You cast a glare out at the scenery ahead, eyes narrowing upwards towards the overcast sky. “I don’t think summer will ever come at this rate. I’m starting to hate it here.”

“Doubt Baltimore was any better,” Mat points out.

“Hardly,” you sigh. “Maybe I’ll ask them to send me to Miami instead. That’d be much better.”

Mat clears his throat quickly, shifting a little. “So, are you planning on going back to Baltimore or... Why are you back?” You catch sight of the frown forming on his face, and he quickly shakes his head as if trying to rid the hint of accusation from his voice. “That sounded wrong, sorry. But just genuinely curious. I thought a permanent move was on the table?”

“It was. Still is, but they needed me back here to wrap up a project. It was a pretty bad move on their behalf to send me there before we had that wrapped up nice and neat, bow and all, but I guess…” You trail off, shrugging a shoulder. “Guess we’ll see what’s next after that. They do want me back there, though. It just depends how long it takes for things here to fall into place.”

“Fair enough.” Another pause, another moment for him to press his lips together in silent deliberation. He did that often, and you wonder if that remains a habit still. “Was it a promotion? I forgot, sorry.”

“All good,” you assure, brushing off the apology. “Not a promotion per se, but a sidestep with just a slightly bigger paycheck. The office there is a bit smaller than the New York one so maybe there’s a higher chance of getting promoted sooner, but I don’t want to jump the gun on that yet. How did things work out for you guys this season?”

The Islanders had a good season, making the playoffs but fell just short of making the semi-finals, you knew that. After all, you hadn’t removed the Islanders game and news alerts from your phone and you put that on your laziness. You wouldn’t shy away from admitting to him you still followed the team’s progression, but you preferred not to.

“Could’ve been better but there’s lots to learn from it,” Mat tells you and there’s a trace of excitement and determination in his voice. “Next season will be even better, I guarantee.”

It’s a staple Mat response, one he always gave if he felt a game didn’t end in their favour or he didn’t do as much as he thought he should have. Sometimes, it took him some time to accept it. Usually, it came to him after pushing himself in training, after going that extra step in the gym, after re-watching highlights or coach videos and always - always, you’d assure him that it takes a team to move forward, not a single person. Always, he’d kiss you and tell you he loves you and always, you’d spend those moments wrapped up in each other’s arms, more often than not with Mat’s head resting against your chest and your leg slung around his hip.

“Plenty of time to lift that cup, Barzal,” you assure him. “Sure, the sooner the better but there’s always a right time for everything.”

“I hope so,” he agrees pensively, and lingers on that thought.

You let him to it, directing your attention back to the view outside and only now and then picking up your phone either to switch songs or browse through a few applications. A part of you feels almost obliged to try and push for conversation but you avoid doing so. The last thing you need is to make it painfully awkward for the two of you and you figure Mat could always do that himself if he feels like it. So, you let your mind wander to better things - to the upcoming rehearsal and the wedding itself, to how good Elise will look and how Tito will be so proud to watch her walk the aisle towards him. You imagine their reaction to the gift you and Mat contributed towards and smiled to yourself, knowing it was a perfect pick for them both.

You don’t think about telling Elise you and Mat had lied to them. You don’t think about passing this hurdle - the final one before you two will become strangers to one another. You don’t think about how the next time you might both see each other again, you’ll both have such different lives that for a brief moment, the surprise of it will knock the air out of your lungs before you remember: that’s him without me, and this is me without him. And you won’t be the first or the last people to break up, but a part of you is certain what the two of you had was unique and could’ve been grand. So much grander.

You become more alert to your surroundings when he starts slowing the car and you notice you’re pulling up into a gas station. As much as space allows you, you stretch out a little and Mat stops right by one of the pumps.

“Want something for the road?” You ask him, unplugging your phone and taking your card from your bag.

“Hold on, I’ll come with you,” Mat tells you and it doesn’t take long for the refill to happen before you both walk into the station’s store, beelining for the snack aisles even if you have only two hours or so until you reach your destination.

“Oh gosh, those are going to be a nightmare to clean up if you spill any in the car,” you groan quietly as he browses through the variety of Nerds flavours.

“But they’re so good though,” he shoots back and flashes a smile that is nothing short of sly when he picks up two boxes instead of one.

“Yeah, until the flavour runs out literally two seconds after you put them in your mouth. I mean, enjoy that but I’m different,” you boast and pick up a bag of sour candy.

“You just like obliterating your taste buds.”

He’s not wrong. Sour candy and spicy foods are your guilty pleasures, and have been for the longest time. You don’t try to look into how easily he recalls that because, you tell yourself, there’s nothing to look into. It’s a mere fact that anyone who knows you would easily recite.

“You’re wrong and you know it, but admitting that is difficult so it’s fine, Barzal. No hard feelings,” you throw back, snickering as you head over to the fridges for a bottle of cold water. Instinctively, you grab another for him and instinctively, he takes your candy and the water to pay for them but you still tag along with him in the queue.

“No shot. I like some spice but to the point where I literally can’t taste anything else? Hey, remember that one time when you made something… Can’t remember what it was but it was so…” He purses his lips and you laugh because yes, yes you remember it so clearly.

“So good you ended up crying over it?” You offer.

“More like, I wasn’t crying but it was so fucking spicy, Y/N, holy.”

“You survived though, didn’t you?”

“I only did because there isn’t a thing you do I don’t like,” he says and then, seems to catch himself but a second too late. “Didn’t like,” he corrects quietly but the damage is done.

You swallow uncomfortably, directing your gaze away from him but don’t hesitate to nod towards the outside. “I’ll head over to the car. I’ll text Elise to tell her we’re close.”

“Y/N—“

But you’re already taking steps towards the exit and out of ear shot, making a beeline for the car. Your heart thumps rapidly and uncomfortable in your chest and find that pressing a palm to your left side doesn’t make it any better. You know it’s an innocent mistake and there are some habits that die hard, but the way he phrased it triggered your fight or flight instinct instantaneously and despite yourself, you leaned towards the latter. You enter the car and take the time to compose yourself as much as you could. The last thing you need is to have a conversation with Mat about this because you didn’t want to have it - it shouldn’t happen for the sake of avoiding making the situation even more uncomfortable. It was an innocent slip up, no doubt, and you should’ve braced yourself to speak of Mat in present tense as opposed to past tense in the presence of others but it comes to you harder than imagined.

It’s odd how you both once knew so much about each other, everything even, and now the two of you are reduced to dancing around all that and making conscious efforts to keep your conversations as short and banal as possible.

You try and busy yourself with formulating a message to Ellie, one that’s long enough to try and make you seem as busy as possible by the time Mat returns to the car, but every line you wrote, every mini paragraph going into dull details about the trip and where you guys currently are seemed like an overthrow. So, you delete that also and simply text her an OTW just as Mat sets the sweets on the centre console and the bottles in the cup holders.

He doesn’t start the engine immediately and your mood quickly switches to frustration. Sure, you hadn’t handled it in the best way possible but trying to have a conversation about it wouldn’t make it any better. Or at least, it’s just something you didn’t want to have to think about for the remainder of the journey.

But he does just that, because that is what Mat always did: he talked with you.

“I’m sorry if it made you uncomfortable,” he begins, “I didn’t mean for it to come out the way it did. It’s force of habit more than anything else.”

“It’s whatever, Mat, so just move past it. I did, simple as that,” you tell him neutrally.

There’s something in that response he must have not liked because you pick up on his small huff and shortly after, the car starts and you’re both on the road again. This time, with silence between you and an atmosphere so heavy it makes you wish you weren’t speeding down an Interstate just so you could open the window and let some of the air in.

The hotel the wedding will be held at lies in front of you, sprawling and secluded and perfect for an event like this. Tito is already at the entrance and when he spots Mat’s car, he waves quickly while Mat quickly flashes the headlights before pulling into an available parking spot.

“There they are!” Tito says by way of greeting and you walk right into his outstretched arms, hugging him. “Can’t believe so much time passed since we last saw each other. What is it, two months? Three?”

“Three,” you confirm once you pull away so that Mat could hug him also. “It’s good to see you too. Where’s Elise?”

“She wanted to check on some small details and said she’ll meet up with you guys in a bit. So here I am, the welcoming committee,” Tito explained and when he and Mat stepped apart, he reached out to give you another short hug which you accepted. “So how was Baltimore? Don’t suppose you liked it all that much if you’re back so soon. This guy was happy about it,” Tito adds, nodding his head towards Mat who was already busy emptying the trunk.

You press your lips together, displaying a small smile. “Baltimore wasn’t too bad but they missed me here, apparently. Can’t complete a damn thing without my two cents so here I am for now.”

Tito frowns, but the expression is very brief. “For now? We’ll need to talk more about that later so Barzy doesn’t mope around as much as he did back then.”

You throw a quick glance towards Mat but he’s looking away towards whatever interesting spot on the ground he found, pointedly ignoring you. “I’ll have a word with him about it later,” you tell Tito lightly and together, the three of you make your way inside, towards the reception.

“I think Elise is in the room at the end of the corridor if you want to say hi,” Tito informs you and you jump at the opportunity.

You follow the corridor, making a right turn and continuing along the dimly lit hallway leading to what the signs informed you to be Conference Room 1. The door is slightly ajar and you begin picking up on the buzz of activity coming from within and soon enough, you’re face to face with a spacey room boasting an array of flowers and various arrangements tastefully decorating tables and drooping down from the ceiling. No doubt, the effect will be lovely during the night when colourful neon lights can be turned on. You spot Elise easily: she’s in the midst of the room with what is undoubtedly the scrapbook of ideas she’d been carefully putting together since Tito asked her to marry him. Outwardly, she’s all smiles and laughter but you can imagine the amount of effort and planning putting all of this together and working with planners takes.

When she spots you, she squeals in excitement, sets her book down and dashes across the room to engulf you in a hug, making you stumble a few steps back.

You burst into laughter and wrap your arms around her, squeezing her with just enough force to try and communicate how much you missed her but not so that it was uncomfortable.

“I missed you! You’re here!” She exclaims, stepping back to look at you in disbelief then hugging you again. “Oh my gosh, I’m so happy you’re here! Where’s Mat? Is he here too?”

“Of course he is,” you assure her with a laugh. “I missed you too.” You throw a curious glance towards the room over her shoulder, nodding your head towards it. “How’s it going? Need me to take over for a bit?”

“Maybe later. Definitely later. Come on.” She wraps an arm around yours and leads the way out of the room, undoubtedly back to the reception area where you left Mat and Tito. “Please tell me Baltimore is off the table. FaceTime is fine, sure, but it’s not great, you know? I need the real deal next to me. Besides, I’m not sure if you heard, but Mat wasn’t Mat without you.”

“So I heard, but forget about us!” You said in a desperate attempt to try and steer attention away from the subject. “Tell me about how everything’s going. Are you still nervous about it? Because trust me, Elise - you have absolutely nothing to be nervous of. What I’ve heard of so far and what I’ve seen will make it the absolute best day, surely.”

“Of course I’m nervous,” she tells you and to demonstrate, she holds her free hand in front of you and sure enough, there’s just a slight tremble to it. “Please lend me some of those nerves of steel of yours, Y/N, I’d do anything to have even a small percentage of them right now.”

“Pft, as if. Those are all show, trust me.”

“I’ll take even that. Oh, Mat!” She greets as soon as the two of you reach the reception area and Elise spots Mat.

Much like you and Tito, they hug and when she steps back, she immediately stands next to Tito who doesn’t hesitate to wrap an arm around her shoulders, pulling her close. They exchange a quick kiss and you smile at the happiness and bliss they’re clearly surrounded by.

It’s the slight pressure on your lower back that makes you jolt a little on the spot and it’s then you realise Mat had gently placed his hand there to encourage you a little closer. It takes effort on your behalf to follow his guidance but you move towards him, though you wish you could physically wince at how undoubtedly stiff the two of you must look. Or hopefully, not greatly so because neither Tito nor Elise comment on it or shoot you any funny looks as the four of you engage in brief conversation, mainly surrounding the trip here and any other guests they expect to receive today.

You don’t hang around much, though. Elise’s phone begins buzzing incessantly and she’s whisked away by the message received, but not before she fixes you with a pointed stare and demands the two of you have drinks later in the evening. Tito follows her also, even if he informs you and Mat that he feels as if he’s running around in the right places only because of Elise and the wedding planners, but you encourage him on by joking he could maybe turn a few candles on the tables this way or that for some extra oomph.

“I can’t imagine how she does it,” you admit to Mat once the elevator doors slide shut soundlessly and the car begins moving upwards to your floor.

“Pretty sure it’s not that big of a deal to her, given what all this is leading to,” Mat tells you and you detect a hint of detachment in his voice.

You don’t welcome it, of course you don’t, but you choose to not point that out to him. The last thing you want is an argument to break out the relatively okay mood the two of you have managed to hold, recent events that could be erased from memory aside. Instead, you simply stand back quietly, eyes glued on the red digital numbers aside until they come to a halt on the ninth floor where the elevator stops and you’re both left in a silent, dimly lit hallway.

Mat has the key to the apartment Elise told you the two of you would be in and just before tapping in, he hands you your own copy of it. Up until this very moment, you hadn’t thought very much of the overnight arrangements. You were pretty sure you meant to ask Elise a bit more about them at some point but both your attention and hers were pulled in different directions and here you were, stepping into your place for the next couple of nights, Mat trailing a little behind you.

You stop, arms folding across your chest and you feel Mat stop somewhere close behind you, looking into one room.

“I didn’t think this through,” you state neutrally.

Ahead of you lay only one bed.

#mat barzal #mat barzal imagine #mat barzal fic #nhl imagine #nhl fanfic #nhl fic #*#the synopsis sucks but i'm bad at short summaries lol #i had this idea since i first joined hockeyblr and i'm happy to have finally found the motivation to write it #anyway i have a vague idea for some scenes #and there will probably be three MAYBE four parts to it

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alt-rose · 3 years

Text

a trip to syracuse - colson baker

colson baker imagine

a trip to syracuse - a trip to syracuse leads to a cameo and a heart to heart.

word count: 4.9K (someone stop me)

the scene is in big time adolescence. if you haven’t seen it, i highly recommend. it’s on hulu.

(this could be considered a part 2 to 21, but it could be read alone)

(GIF from tenor)

it was July. you had spent your last few months working your ass off at SNL before staring as a lead in your first comedy film after your second season of SNL had ended. you had been all over the country in the last few months. you were in New York for work. then, you traveled home to your hometown to visit your family during your first week of the summer hiatus. then, you had to ship out to LA to work on your movie. then, you somehow ended back in your hometown.

you were everywhere. busy. never had time for yourself, or the time to do what you really wanted.

you hadn’t seen Colson since a few weeks after your birthday weekend. you texted back and forth. you called occasionally when you both had time. he made you laugh, and you, of course, enjoyed hearing about all his crazy stories. you looked forward to the random pictures he sent you from the studio or from set. he liked having something to share with someone, or rather, someone to share things with.

the two of you were like two best friends that could share everything with each other without needing to be physically there for each other. you could go days without talking because of your busy schedules, yet whenever you caught up with each other, it felt so natural. your relationship felt impossible to explain to anyone that asked. you felt connected to him somehow, but you couldn’t place the feeling.

colson baker: you should come visit me

that was the text you got at 3 am on a Wednesday, well technically Thursday.

you smiled at your phone as you stared at it. the light blinded you as you laid in bed in your dark bedroom at your parent’s house. it was 4 am in New York. what could he have possibly been doing? you learned not to ask that question often when it came to Colson and Pete. they were night owls and tended to drink or smoke anything they could get their hands on. for your sake, you’d rather not know what they were doing. it helped keep your nerves at bay.

however, 4 am in New York tended to worry you a bit. you opened your phone, squinting as the light grew brighter. you began to type back.

you: I should?

you: please tell me you are being safe

you scrolled through your phone as you waited for a response. your phone buzzed with a notification. you opened the message.

colson baker: safe at pete’s place

ah. Pete’s place was their new hangout. Pete was staying with his girlfriend, AG, as you called her, and it was technically her place. they were getting ready to head to Syracuse in a week or so for Pete’s new movie that Colson was making a cameo in.

colson baker: you should visit

colson baker: call me a pussy but I miss you

you smiled at that text. he missed you. your heart thumped in your chest.

you: I miss you too

you: text me tomorrow when you are sober and it’s not the middle of the night.

you: let’s see if sober colson wants me to visit

you watched as the typing bubbles appeared before the message appeared.

colson baker: sober colson said yes

colson baker: but, I’ll text you tomorrow about it

you laugh at his message before typing back.

you: goodnight cols

you: get some rest

your eyes began to lull shut, but you were determined to stay up for the next ten minutes in case he wanted to text you.

you fell asleep to one finally message from him.

colson baker: goodnight velcro monkey

somehow the velcro monkey joke always made an appearance when someone was drunk or high. it made them laugh at how the reserved, independent person you were could turn into the clingiest drunk on the planet.

you smiled one last time before shutting off your phone and going back to sleep.

the next morning, you sat in your parents’ kitchen answering emails on your laptop. your attention was occasionally pulled away from work as you watched your dogs play in the family room. it was good to be home for a bit, but your parents and dogs were a bit distracting when it came time to work.

“your phone has been buzzing for the last 20 minutes,” you mom said setting your phone down at the kitchen table. “you left this upstairs.”

“god, thank you,” you tell her not looking up from your computer.

“a lot of messages from a Colson Baker,” she gives you a look, raising her eyebrow.

“who’s Colson Baker?” your dad asked butting into the conversation as he made his way into the kitchen.

you moved to quickly snatch you phone from them. you were an adult now with an adult job, yet they still treated you like a teenager.

“a friend,” you reply as you opened your phone.

you had four messages and a missed call from Colson.

“seemed like they really wanted to get a hold of you,” you mom hummed as she moved to make her third cup of coffee that day.

“why do they want to get a hold of you so badly? seems important,” your dad chimed in.

“guys, it’s fine. please chill,” you reply. “just a friend. anyway, I have to take this call.”

you got up from the table before taking your dogs out to your back patio. you took a seat on one of the outdoor lounges as you called Colson.

“hey,” his raspy voice rang through the phone.

“hey,” you sigh. “what’s up with Syracuse?”

“you should come visit me in Syracuse.”

“I know, but why Syracuse?” you laugh.

“Pete’s doing his movie, and we’re both making a cameo.”

you went silent for a bit.

“we talked to the director this morning. they need background for my cameo scene, so I suggested you to Pete, and he was cool with it. the director said it was cool if you wanted to join the project for a cameo.”

“are you serious?”

“deadly. come spend the rest of the summer in Syracuse with me.”

“I’ll have to check my schedule-”

“shut up,” he laughed. “I know you’re free.”

“you’re right,” you sighed. “my family isn’t going to be happy with me leaving again, but they can just visit when SNL starts back up.”

“so you’ll do it?”

“sure, what else do I have to do?” you asked adjusting the phone to your ear. “plus, a week or two in Syracuse with you and Pete would be fun.”

“YES,” you heard him shout over the phone. “aight, cool,” he finally calms down. “I’ll let Pete know.”

“alright, Cols. sounds good,” you sigh into the phone.

“what’s wrong?” he asked after a beat.

“nothing. I’m just trying to figure out how to explain why a Colson Baker was blowing up my phone earlier to my parents.”

you heard him let out a laugh from his end. you heard him murmur something to someone. you heard him laugh once more before he addressed you.

“Pete said to tell your parents that I’m your dealer.”

“tell Pete that my parents might have a heart attack.”

you heard him mumble something before you heard a roar of voices.

“tell your parents that Colson works as a janitor for NBC,” you heard Pete yell into the phone.

“you guys are ridiculous,” you sigh into the phone as you pinch the bridge of your nose.

“but you love us,” Pete sang into the phone.

“yeah, I do.”

you heard them laugh.

“you could just tell you parents the truth,” Colson suggested. “I don’t mind your family knowing. the whole reason we were keeping it quiet was to keep you out of the spotlight.”

you thought about it for a minute.

“and what exactly are we keeping from her family?” you heard Pete in the background.

“that I’m her best friend now. I replaced you,” Colson quickly replied.

“HEY,” you yelled sitting up in your seat. “I never said that.”

“it’s okay,” Pete said louder into the phone. you can only assume he was closer to the phone. “I know you love him more than me.”

“that’s not true,” you said in a defensive tone. “I love you both equally.”

“RIIIIIGHT,” Pete drew through the phone.

“right,” Colson agreed.

“it’s okay. I know who you text when you’re supposed to be working, (y/n),” Pete slyly said in the phone.

“knock it off, Pete,” you growl into the phone, causing the guys to laugh. “where’s your girlfriend? can’t you go bother her?”

“oh shit,” you heard Pete say. “I forgot to bring her the food we made. bye (y/n).”

you laughed at him before you heard Colson.

“I took you off speaker. he went back into his room with the food.”

“you guys made breakfast?”

“yeah, our post-mushroom pancakes,” he said. “totally came down from them a half hour ago. the food’s probably cold as shit now.”

“RIP to AG’s kitchen.”

“RIP, indeed.”

you laughed.

“I can’t wait to see you, Cols,” you smile into the phone.

“I’m excited to see you, too. I’ll send you a plane ticket.”

“I can pay for my own plane ticket. it’s okay,” you reply. “you can save that up to buy me dinner when I get to Syracuse.”

“(y/n) (y/l/n), are you asking me on a date?”

“too forward?” you laugh.

“not forward enough. maybe, I could buy you breakfast too?”

you laugh and cover your mouth with his suggestion before you finally calm yourself down.

“maybe you could,” you reply coolly.

“NOOOO,” he whined into the phone. “can you come to New York now?”

you laughed together before the conversation lulled into a gentle silence.

“can I tell you a secret?” you whisper into the phone.

“shoot.”

“I’ve been listening to your music.”

you paused waiting for his reaction.

“oh boy, have I converted you to hip hop and rap?”

“no, I made an exception for Machine Gun Kelly,” you smile.

“really?” you could hear him shift around. “got a favorite?”

“27,” you reply too quickly. “I’m a sucker for the piano. Kiss the Sky and Habit are pretty good too.”

“next show I have, you’re gonna be in the crowd. I want to perform for you.”

“for me?” you ask in a posh voice. “you could always give me a private show.”

“I just might.”

suddenly, your attention was pulled to your mom who was standing at the back door. you raise an eyebrow at her as you listened to Colson mumble through the phone.

“hold on, Cols,” you tell him. “what’s up?” you ask her.

“we’re leaving in a half an hour to go to dinner at your grandparents. you need to get ready,” she replied.

you nod to her. she stood in the doorway waiting for you to get off the phone. you raised another eyebrow at her. she wanted to eavesdrop on your conversation.

“alright,” you sigh. “Cols, I have to go. I have dinner with my grandparents.”

“fine. fine. call me later?”

“yeah, I’ll call you later.”

“bye (y/n), love you.”

you smiled at that. even though the love was platonic, it felt good to hear it from him.

“bye Cols, love you too.”

once you hung up, you gave your mom a pointed look.

“love, huh?” she smiled.

“just a friend,” you mutter before calling the dogs in.

“just a friend that you love,” she teased.

“so who is Colson Baker?” your dad chimed in once the two of you made it inside.

“he’s a friend of Pete and I,” you reply heading to the stairs.

“what does he do?” your dad asked looking up from his phone.

“just look him up. I have to get ready.”

once you safely made it up the stairs and away from their questions, you began to rummage through your closet for clothes. you were pulled out of your search by your dad yelling up the stairs.

“MACHINE GUN KELLY. YOU’RE FRIENDS WITH MACHINE GUN KELLY?”

a week and a half later, you were on a plane to Syracuse. your parents weren’t super hip about you leaving so soon, but you argued that it was for work. and, it was. you weren’t lying.

they also were not so happy about your friendship with Colson, or Machine Gun Kelly as they knew him. your mom argued for the tattoos, which made no sense, since they liked Pete, and he had tattoos. they were also not so impressed that he was a rapper.

maybe, you shouldn’t have let them read all the articles about him.

he was heavily misunderstood by the media, and Colson was not ‘Machine Gun Kelly’. he was Colson Baker. you tried to explain that he was so much more than what the media portrayed, but your parents were more of the seeing rather than believing type.

with that all said, you were happy to be out of the house. you were tired of constantly arguing for and defending your friendship. anytime you got super defensive of Colson, your family accused you of being in love with him. were you? hell yeah. but, you weren’t going to admit that to anyone. you ran from your feelings, remember?

once you finally landed at the airport in Syracuse, you texted the guys.

colson baker: in line waiting for you

colson baker: north pick up line

colson baker: black escalade

when you finally made it out the doors with your baggage, you searched for the black escalade. you attention was pulled to the sound of doors opening, and you found Colson on the passenger side of the car as Pete climbed into the backseat. you smiled as you watched the guys. you made your way to them.

“hi,” you smile.

“hi,” Colson replied looking down at you.

you kinda forgot what it was like to be around six-foot giants. Colson moved to take your bag from you before putting it in the trunk. after you helped him load up your bag, he took your hand and led you to the passenger seat.

before you could hop in, he grabbed you and kissed you. you moved to grip the fabric of his jacket as you kissed him back.

“did you just kiss her? what? did he just kiss you?” Pete asked dumbfounded from the backseat as he looked back and forth from you and Colson.

you laughed to yourself as you buckled your seat belt while Colson made his way to the driver’s seat. as he hopped in and buckled up, he turned to you. you laughed before turning to Pete.

“anyone want to answer me? did you kiss her?” Pete said slapping Colson’s shoulder with the back of his hand.

“yeah, I did. what are you going to do about it?” Colson raised an eyebrow at him.

you laughed picking at the skin of your lip.

“what the hell? am I third wheeling this whole trip?”

“dude, you would have had me third wheeling this whole trip if we didn’t invite her.”

“how long?” Pete whined. “how long has this been a thing?”

“since my birthday,” you reply quietly.

“since your birthday,” he said dropping his jaw. “that was months ago.”

“I know,” you laugh. “to be fair, we haven’t seen each other much since. we’ve been talking and stuff, though.”

“what the hell, guys.”

you and Colson both laughed as he pulled out of his spot in line and drove toward your hotel.

“oh, I told my parents about you, and they googled you. they aren’t very happy.”

“fantastic.”

you spent your first day on set waiting around for the guys in Pete’s trailer before your call time. you and Colson sat and talked, just being close to each other after months apart. once it was finally your call time, you got your makeup and hair done, which wasn’t much considering you were just an extra in a scene.

the director had you placed at a bar table with two other girls. drinks were all placed in front of you. you fixed your hair a bit before the director called action. the scene began and you just kept your head down, while you waited for your cue. one of the guys walked up to your table and began talking to the three of you. the camera panned over to your table, and the guy began his lines. you smiled and laughed at him.

“I already have a tab open so if you want another-”

“hey,” Pete yelled catching your attention. “I’m sorry about our friend. we found him in a dumpster. he’s a rescue. sorry”

“it’s okay,” the girl next to you yelled.

“aw don’t worry. he’s got all of his shots though, so he won’t bite,” Pete called back.

“oh,” the girl laughed. “what about your puppy?”

“who? Mo?”

“yeah, he looks a little young to be in here.”

“you look a little old to be in here,” Pete shot back. you had to hold in your laugh.

“CUT,” the director yelled. “let’s do it one more time, just in case, and then move on.”

you repeated the scene once more before everyone moved on to the next part of your scene. the guys all crowded around your small table. Colson stood behind Pete, who was sitting on one of the barstools.

“you guys look great. can we get another girl on the other side of Griffin please?” the director asked, gesturing to the second lead in the film. “(y/n), can you move?”

“yeah,” you reply before hopping out of your seat to sit on the other side of Griffin. you then realized that you were directly in the camera’s line of vision.

you looked up at Colson who was across the table from you. he sent you a wink before taking a drink of whatever liquid was in his glass. you smiled back at him before Pete reached across the table to fist bump you. you laughed at him before getting ready for the scene.

the director moved back and called “Action.”

“Mo actually got back from the army,” Pete started his lines.

“yeah?” you respond.

“yeah, he was there for 16 years,” Pete replied to you.

“let’s not talk about, yeah,” Griffin responded giving Pete and Colson a look.

“anyway, yeah, he hasn’t been laid in 16 years. how crazy is that?” Pete said before Colson could interrupt him.

“aye, to Mo,” Colson said bring his glass in.

“to Mo,” the table responded crashing the glasses together.

“welcome back brother,” Colson said.

“yeah, man.”

“hoo-rah, right?” Colson said clinking his glass to yours.

“hoo-rah,” Griffin cheered back.

“hey, may we all make it to heaven before the devil knows we’re dead, baby,” Colson yelled.

“YEAH,” Pete cheered back beating his chest like a frat boy.

“cheers,” Griffin called before clinking his glass to yours.

“wait. what does that mean?” Pete asked.

“like, we’re sinners and-and-” Colson nodded his head. “and, bad motherfuckers, and he’s coming to suck us back…” Colson paused to do a little motion before continuing. “he wants us.”

“isn’t that, like a Buzz Frontier song?” the other guy asked, and Colson looked up at him.

“who wants us?” Pete interrupts looking at Colson. “what did he do? what did we do?”

“Satan, motherfucker, wants us,” Colson said moving his head to emphasize each word.

he then bent his head back up before making eye contact with you. one of the other girls began to laugh, which caused the table to laugh with her. Colson sent you another wink, and you smiled back at him.

“Cut,” the director called. “that was good. let’s do it one more time.”

you were sad that your scene was over. you liked working with Pete and Colson. after you finished getting out of your costume, you put your clothes back on before heading to Pete’s trailer. in there, Pete and Colson were lounging on the furniture.

“what are you two doing?” you laugh as you close the trailer door behind you.

“waiting for you,” Pete shot back.

“what’s the plan?” you asked taking a seat on the couch next to Colson.

he wrapped an arm around you.

“I have to shoot for a few more hours, but we can meet up later,” Pete suggested.

“do you want to go out?” Colson asked you. “while we wait.”

“sure,” you nodded. “what time do you think you’ll be done?” you asked Pete.

“not sure, but I’ll text you.” Pete stood up from his seat. “I have to get back, but I’ll see you later.”

“aight,” Colson replied reaching to dab up Pete.

Pete took his hand before patting you on the head.

“bye Pete,” you call to him as he leaves.

“bye, be safe,” he laughs back at the two of you.

as you watched the door of the trailer shut, you felt a pair of eyes on you. you turned to find Colson staring down at you.

“what?” you laugh at him. “do I have something on my face?”

“no.” he gave you a small smile.

“then, stop staring at me like that.”

“staring at you like what?”

“like that,” you said pointing at his face. “making me feel self-conscious.”

“can’t help that you’re really pretty.”

“and that’s my cue to go,” you say starting to get up from the couch.

Colson laughed behind you before pulling you back onto the couch.

“do you want to go to the mall?” he asked smiling at you. “then I can take you out for that dinner you promised me.”

“ohhhh, I guess I did promise you a dinner,” you hum. “let’s go then.”

“try it on.”

“no. did you see how many zeros were on that tag?”

“jesus, just try it on.”

“no.”

“get in that goddamn dressing room and try on the goddamn dress,” Colson mutter quietly to you.

Colson had dragged you into some fancy boutique to “buy you a dress.” you resisted, of course, and the fact that he was so willing to buy you an expensive dress scared you. you were very responsible with your money, and you never splurged on yourself. this, of course, was not going over well with Colson now that you were refusing to even try on a dress that was more than a hundred dollars.

“Colson, it’s really expensive,” you softly say looking up at him.

“so?” he shrugged. “please let me buy you something nice.” he gave you the closest thing he could to ‘puppy dog eyes.’

“jesus, fine,” you breathe pulling yourself from his eyes. “I’m trying it on, but if I don’t like it, you’re not buying it.”

“scouts honor,” he said holding up his hand.

with that, you snatched the hot pink mini dress from his hands and marched toward the dressing room. you could hear Colson lightly laughing at you as he watched you.

once you made it into the dressing room, you took a seat on the bench. you put your head in your hands before taking a breath. were you doing this? yes, and it went against every bone in your body. after you settled yourself down, you began to take off your clothes before trying on the dress.

once you began to slip on the dress, you couldn’t get it to zip up. you tried every angle possible, but the zipper wouldn’t budge. you let out a heavy sigh before collecting yourself. you peeked through the sliver of the door to see if Colson was outside the dressing room. you found him browsing at a rack of clothes a few feet from your dressing room.

you opened the door by a crack before poking your head out.

“Colson,” you whisper-yelled to him.

his head perked up before finding you. he began to stalk closer to you.

“how does it look?” he asked when he got to you.

“I think I need a bigger size,” you admitted to him.

“I’ll go grab the next size up, but can I at least see it?”

“no, it won’t zip up,” you shot back.

“can I try?”

“can you try?”

“jesus christ,” he sighed pinching the bridge of his nose. “just turn around.”

you opened the door a bit more before turning around. you felt him place his hands on your hips before finding the zipper.

“this should totally zip,” he whispered in your ear. “the zipper’s just stuck.”

you felt him move the zipper down before pulling it back up. the dress finally zipped.

you sighed once the dress finally fit properly. as you glanced in the mirror, you fell in love with the dress. you looked good. it was almost as if the dress was made for your body. it didn’t gap in weird places, and it wasn’t too snug. it felt perfect, and for its price, you were glad it was perfect. it would be a rip-off if it wasn’t.

“damn,” Colson whispered.

“damn,” you nodded.

“you’re getting it.”

“I’m not going to fight you on it,” you reply turning around to face him. “now, get out so I can get dressed.”

“at least, let me unzip you first,” he laughed.

four hours and a shopping trip later, you and Colson were sitting in some fancy restaurant together. he was in a fashionable shirt and jacket while you sat in your hot pink mini dress.

“thank you for dinner,” you say reaching across the table to take his hand.

“you’re welcome,” he smiled at you after he handed the paid check back to the waitress. “I promised you a dinner, didn’t i?”

“you did,” you laugh.

“you wanna get out of here?” he suggests nodding toward the door.

“sure,” you nod back.

with that, he moved to help you out of your chair. with his hand in yours, the two of you headed to his rental car. he opened the passenger door for you. before you could get in the car, you turned and placed a hand on his cheek.

his eyes met yours, and your heart melted. his hands landed on your waist, and he pulled you close before planting his lips on yours. you leaned up to kiss him back. and there you were, standing in the parking lot of a fancy restaurant making out like a bunch of teenagers.

at sunset, the two of you were sitting at the private rooftop patio of your hotel. you were both laying on one of the daybeds watching the sky change colors. you were deep in thought.

“I’m scared,” you admit staring up at the sky.

“scared?” Colson quietly asked you from where he was laying next to you.

“yeah,” you breathe. “I don’t do relationships. I run from them. maybe it’s my fear of rejection or my fear of getting hurt.” you pause for a moment. “I really like you. like really, really like you. and part of me is scared because I don’t want to get hurt, but I want a relationship. I want love, you know?”

“I get it,” he murmured next to you.

you were both at the point of the night where deep conversations were rolling. should you have been so honest with him? who knows. would you regret it tomorrow? maybe. but, right now, it had been said.

“and, I want a relationship with you.” he rolled over on his side to face you. “I’m just scared because I don’t want to be just another girl for you. you buy me a pretty dress and take me to dinner with the hopes that I land in your bed tonight, and it makes me wonder,” you whisper.

you could feel his gaze. he took one of your hands and placed a kiss on the backside of it.

“you and I both know my track record with relationships kinda suck,” he starts. “but, I want this to work.” he brushed a peace of hair from your face. “I’ve never felt this way with anyone, and I’m going to be completely honest when I say it scares the shit out of me. and, if it makes you more comfortable, we can take this relationship at whatever speed you want it to go. I just want to be with you. I want to make this work, and I want to be a part of your life. I want this relationship to be more than just texts at 4 am and kissing you once every three months.”

you were both quiet for a bit. you were processing what he had said. he wants this to work. he wants to be with you. he wants this relationship, and he wants it to be more.

“I’m gonna fall in love with you if you keep saying shit like that,” you whisper after your moment of silence.

“good,” he smiled placing a hand on your cheek. “because, I’m falling in love with you.”

your breath caught in your throat. you wrapped your arms around his neck before pulling him down to you. he placed his lips on yours and kissed you. laying there in the daybed, you kissed him back.

“be my whatever,” he whispered.

“be your whatever?” you ask raising an eyebrow.

“yeah, whatever you want to call yourself. just be mine. be mine, baby.”

“okay.”

and you kissed him once more.

not sure how i feel about this. hopefully, this does justice for a part two, anon. i hope you enjoyed. feel free to send requests. - rose xx

#colson baker #colson baker imagines #colson baker x reader #machine gun kelly imagines #machine gun kelly x reader

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uhgoodmoni · 3 years

Text

Our Clock is Ticking | KTH

After a post Christmas breakup with his girlfriend Taehyung is celebrating New Years alone in a hotel. The ball drops, yet 2021 doesn’t come.

Warnings: angst and some fluff

Ao3 - Wattpad

(Taehyung POV)

I pull my lips together in a frown, glancing down at the last text I sent.

‘Merry Christmas I guess’

‘Read at 1:34 am’

A deep sigh heaves from my chest. Yeah. Merry fucking Christmas and a Happy New Year. Stuck in an unfamiliar country in an unfamiliar town by my damn self. Guess we picked the perfect time to pick a fight. I bring my eyes to the clock. It’s 5:00 pm on New Year’s Eve. I could be at home with the rest of the boys but nooo. She had to drag me out to see her damn family and then pick a fight with me so I’m stuck spending the holiday alone.

My head falls back against the couch. What the fuck am I going to do now? It’s already passed the new year in Korea, but maybe I’ll call someone. Jimin… Yoongi. I don’t know. What would I even say? Hey, Mara and I broke up yesterday, and now I’m alone on New Years. Tch. Yeah. As much as I’d love to spill my guts out to them I’ve cried so much this week I feel just like shit. At this point, I just want to fly back home.

Luckily I was able to snag a flight back to Seoul for tomorrow. Not that it didn’t cost a lot, but there’s no way I’m spending another day here to wallow in my self-pity.

The phone screen still shines up in my eyes and I look one more time. A tiny circular picture of her sits at the top of our text. Her tongue stuck out to touch the camera when I took the photo. Silly.

When I take that flight tomorrow, will I ever see her again? I grind my teeth together, my thumb pressing against the power button. Despite how much anger is burning inside me, I hope the answer is yes.

‘I’ll be happier if I lived this next year without you.’ She really said that. I roll over onto my side, curling up on the cushions. She’s probably right. I honestly did make everything harder for her. She was always so understanding though. I wonder if she even meant it.

I sniff, wiping at a stray tear I hadn’t noticed. I’d like to think that she didn’t mean it. That she was just angry and it spilled out after all the dumb shit I said. Or what maybe I didn’t say. A shaky breath leaves my body, and my eyes clench shut. Oh, why can't I stop thinking about it?

Maybe she did mean it. I had never seen her say something with more conviction and anger, her body shook as she had screamed it at me. Her face had gone red like the wine we were drinking. I’m sure that fueled our anger too. But there had to be some backing behind her words. Even if this fight had been the last straw there were so many feelings leading up to this. Every night she spent waiting up for me. How could I not see her patience running out? Slowly but surely our clock had been ticking. Every time we greeted each other, said goodbye, kissed. Had her patience been running out then too?

Even I knew we weren’t fine. Fuck. I should have said something. Maybe I didn’t tell her how much she means to me often enough. Probably not. Of course, she cracked for the holidays. But did she really have to be so cruel?

I glance up from the couch, feeling the vibrations of a phone call. Damnit, I was hoping to avoid talking to anyone for the whole night. Should have figured, they are probably missing me. I sigh looking at the contact. Hoba hyung, a facetime. Not even just a voice call. Internally I groan looking myself in the reflection on my screen and making sure I don’t look like the shit I feel like.

After a deep breath, I answer the call. “Heyyy hyung…” I try and push away everything that has happened. If I tell him he’ll just be worried for no reason.

“Taeee, Happy New Year.” I smile lightly looking at him. He looks tired cause he probably stayed up all night.

I grin, trying to hide away the frown that was stuck on my face. “Hobaa why are you awake so early?” He raises an eyebrow and just shakes his head.

“Just am I guess, and knew you’d be awake so I wanted to call you. How’s the holiday with the missus?”

It’s awful. I said something inconsiderate and ruined the whole thing. We were drinking and I took her defensiveness as an attack on me. Maybe it was maybe it wasn’t. Doesn’t matter. We broke up and she said she doesn’t want to spend another year of her life with me. Now I’m sad and alone on New Years’ Eve. Probably won’t even watch the ball drop. Soak up my misery. I still have that bottle of wine I bought.

At least that’s what I wanted to tell him. And I will. Eventually. Just not today.

“She’s with the fam they are cooking in the kitchen.” I grin and he seems satisfied with that. Hobi is always fooled by my lies. Part of me wished that Jimin or Yoongi had called. They’d be able to call out my bullshit…

“Well, I shouldn’t bother you then you better go help…”

“Yeah… well, how was your night last night?” I say, trying to get him to stay on the call a little longer. Damn, I wish I could go home.

“You know… the usual. Jin passed out right after midnight. Me too.” He giggles. “But the others I guess you could say partied. Not really but we had fun.” I smile at this. Wish I had been there with them.

“Wish I had been there.” I sigh, but smile softly to him, hoping to not reveal how I really feel.

“No, you don’t silly. Go have fun!” He winks to me, “You’ll see us in a couple days anyway.”

“You’re right.” I nod not feeling like telling him I’ll actually be on my way back tomorrow. It stays silent for a moment as he smiles up to me.

“Stay safe and tell Mara I say hi!” He waves and I only nod.

“Bye.”

“Bye.” He says and hangs up. Well… I look at the clock seeing it’s only been about ten minutes since I last checked the time. It’s gonna be a long night.

My palms press into my skull. Trying to nullify the ache resonating in the back of my head. Oh shit. I groan, shielding my eyes as I tentatively open them. Trying to bring myself to life I lick my lips, the taste of that wine leftover on my breath. I cringe, taking a deep breath. Did I really end up drinking last night? I thought that wasn’t the plan. I lift my head from my pillow seeing the bottle resting on the counter. Still full. I swear I could remember at least drinking at least a glass though. Except now I no longer taste the wine on my tongue. As if it had never been there in the first place.

I exhale and plop my head back down. Dumb. Dumb. Dumb. Fuck.

Again I lift my head up, searching for my phone on it’s charger. What time is it? Oh God what if I slept too late and missed my alarm.

2:34 pm. Fuck.

I pull up my ticket on my phone. 4:30 pm. Could I make it in time? Might as well try… I read over the confirmation email.

Thank you for your purchase… Your flight is for 1/1/2021 4:30 pm.

I toss myself from the bed, heading to my suitcase. Should I change? Do I have time? At least I should brush my teeth. I flick through the email, feeling like I’m forgetting something as I shuffle to the bathroom.

Sent at 2:00 pm.

I squint my eyes at this. Specifically remembering that I got this email yesterday and not today. Maybe it’s like a reminder. I shrug and wet my toothbrush.

An alarm sounds from my phone as I set it down making me jump. I scrunch up my face remembering I had a headache, but it’s not really bothering me anymore.

I look at the alarm… a reminder I set for myself. But it was supposed to go off yesterday. It did go off yesterday.

Reminder: flight tomorrow leave by 1:30.

I shake my head, lifting my head to the mirror. I look like shit, but I have this whole week let's be honest. Setting my toothbrush down I pull up my calendar. Did I get it wrong or something? No, my flight confirmation definitely says the first.

I glance at the little red dot on the calendar indicating the date. 12/31/2020. Pressing my lips into each other, I raise an eyebrow staring at the screen for a minute. It has to be wrong. I almost laugh to myself. Am I crazy?

I check the time again on my phone. 2:40 Thursday, December 31.

Have I completely mixed up the dates? I could swear that yesterday was New Years Eve. I push my hair back, looking back into the mirror. Though I didn’t watch the ball drop so maybe I was just mistaken.

Just to be sure, I look up the airport’s number, and give them a call. There’s no chance I’m missing the flight. After a confusing phone call they confirm my suspicions. My flight isn’t until tomorrow. Feeling very confused I finish brushing my teeth and start running the shower. How could I have mistaken yesterday for New Years Eve? I guess it happens. But I so clearly remember the date. Hoseok even called me wishing for me to have a good night. Had I imagined that as well?

After being refreshed from the heat of the shower I check my phone’s history. No call from Hoseok, which means I must have been in a daze of grief. Still, It doesn’t feel right. The call is so fresh in my mind.

I look to the clock after cleaning up my room. It was a mess. I hadn’t picked anything up and would have had to pack last minute in the morning if I left it that way. Despite wishing I was on that plane back to Seoul right now. I feel much better than I did yesterday. I should stay productive, keep my mind off things.

Time has gone by particularly slow today. Even after cleaning up myself and packing for tomorrow. I’ve been avoiding my feelings all day. I resorted to playing on Weverse and messing with Duolingo. Despite wanting to write, I knew that I would just dig myself into a hole.

Maybe this time around I’ll call Hoseok. I don’t want to wake him up though. It’s still early and I know he’ll want to sleep in after the late night last night.

‘You awake?’ I text the group chat. Maybe Jin or I don’t know, anyone to save me from my thoughts will answer. Though, maybe it’s a good idea to talk about it with one of them. Maybe they could tell me what to do. Ugh, it’s so confusing. Even though Mara said she never wants to see me again I doubt that she really meant that. Right? I certainly don’t want that to be the last time we ever see one another. I swallow. She was so angry. So upset. Her hands shook as the tears streamed down her face, and she sniffed trying to hold back the storm behind her eyes. And I just stood there. Like a jackass. A deer in headlights. Didn’t cry. I couldn’t, I didn’t want to react, cause I thought she was overreacting. She shouldn’t have cared so much about what I said. It wasn’t meant to make her so upset.

My face finds the palms of my hands. I’m so dumb. What the fuck possessed me to be such an asshole? All she wanted was for me to care and I didn’t. But I do. I really do. My cheeks form a blush as my face heats from the tears. I press into my temples willing myself not to cry. Stupid.

Feeling the buzzing of my phone, I look down. It’s Hoseok, and I huff before answering.

“Hey Tae bear!” He greets happily in my ear. I try to smile but I just want to be with him and not on this dumb call. Instead of being alone I wish I was home.

My eyes start to water and a horrible feeling starts crawling up my throat. I know that if I try to speak I’ll just…

“Are you there?”

I swallow, trying to push back this feeling. But I can’t, It’s pushing back. Tears prick at my eyes, and I just want Hoseok to be here to hold me. Despite trying so hard to hold the tears in, the feeling overwhelms me and washes over me. I heave out a hard sob. Revealing a feeling I had been holding back all day. My breaths are fast and choppy as the tears roll, and I cling to the phone curling my knees into my abdomen.

“Tae… Are you okay?” He sounds worried. I try to slow my breaths and answer him but I can’t. It just. I squeeze my fists. I hate this feeling.

The stream of tears doesn’t stop as I hug myself closer. “Sorry…” I barely hiccup out.

“Taehyung are you okay? Are you hurt? What’s happening?” I shake my head, pressing my eyes into my knees. The tears soak at my pants and I take a deep breath, sighing out slowly to try and relax.

“I’m sorry Hobi…” I sniffed, should have figured that would have happened. Wiping away at my face with my shirt sleeves, I start to explain. “Mara and I... it’s over.” I bite my cheek to hold my composure.

“Tae what happened?” he asks, sounding confused. Great, I shake my head. I just want to be with him. I don’t want to have to deal with this phone call. “I told her she doesn’t do enough.” I deadpan, taking in my own words myself. “I said that.” My heart twists, causing more tears to wring out from my eyes. Knowing now how it made her feel. Coming from the mouth from someone she loves. I meant it lightheartedly, but that’s no excuse now. I know her better than that. She does more than enough. God I hope she knows that. I hope that’s why she screamed at me. “What do you mean?” He practically shouts, but I can tell he’s trying to remain calm. “What happened? That doesn’t make any sense. When?”

I sigh, “Like a week ago…”

He interrupts before I can continue, “Where are you? Why didn’t you call?”

“I’m fine, I’m at a hotel and I’m flying back tomorrow.”

He sighs, “What happened? You guys…”

“It was dumb. I said something dumb.” I groan, pushing my hair out of my face. “It just spiraled after that cause we were drinking and I thought she was overreacting cause I didn’t mean what I said.” Hobi listens as I go on, “ I could tell that it upset her but I didn’t care, cause I didn’t mean it like that. I should have immediately apologized. No. I shouldn’t have said it at all.”

“Why don’t you call her and tell her this?”

I shake my head knowing he can’t see me. “She said she doesn’t want to be with me another year of her life.” It takes a lot to swallow that down. I really toppled the jenga tower. Instead of fixing the problem all I did was be inconsiderate and ruin everything. I’d like to blame the alcohol but it’s far too late for that. Not that she would believe me but truly it was a joke. My shoulders fall, a misunderstanding that I was too petty to reverse.

“Oh.” He says plainly, leaving both of us in silence. Damn. Now I feel like shit. I should have waited to tell him. Now he’s just gonna worry too much. I could have waited to tell him.

“Sorry, I’m fine really I’ll be coming home tomorrow. I just want to be with you guys again.”

Hoseok sighs, “Tae don’t say you’re fine if you’re not... It’s okay, you’ve been with Mara over two years. You’re definitely not going to be fine.” A hot tear runs down my cheek, and I can tell my face is swollen. “Why don’t you stay on the phone with me and later all of the guys and us will be there for the ball drop.”

“No, no…” I mutter, knowing that they’ll all just worry their heads off. “I’ll wait to talk to the others when I get home. I think I just want to sleep early and get this day over with.” What a hell of a way to start the year, I sigh.

“Do you want to stay on the call?” He asks, and I really contemplate this one for a while.

My breathing is shaky as I agree, “Just till I fall asleep, thanks hyung.”

I slowly open my eyes, crusty, and still swollen from last night. The hotel room is lit up around the curtains. My alarm didn’t go off again? My hand wanders to the nightstand to pick up my phone.

3:00 pm. My eyes widen and my heart jumps up with me in bed. Are you fucking kidding me? How in the hell did I sleep that long? Oh, God. There’s literally no way I’d make the flight. Why didn’t my alarms work? I stare at the time, wishing it would magically change to a couple hours earlier. How is it already the afternoon? Was I really that tired?

Not even bothering to stand I press my cheek into my palm. What the fuck? My teeth grind together. Why? After all of this shit. Why now? Can’t I just have one God damn easy day?

Is it possible to cancel my flight ticket this late? I should at least try. Maybe there will be some open tickets on a later flight. Though I highly doubt it as it’s New Year’s day and everyone is going home. God, I’ll be lucky to find a flight this week at all, I barely found this one.

On my lap my phone pings. I look down expecting maybe Hoseok.

Mara… Can I call you?

Immediately my stomach begins to spin. What could she have to say to me? I try to relax as I stare at the text. She’s already said the worst so it can’t be anything bad? Even if she tried apologizing I just... I fucked up. Would she forgive me?

After a moment I text her back, now anxiously awaiting her call. I hope she wants to talk it over. I hope that I can apologize. I hope she didn’t mean what she said. The phone rings, but I give it a moment before I answer. Stupid. I don’t want to seem desperate, but I am.

“Hey this is so out of nowhere but what day is it?” She says, sounding completely normal. Like we had just been talking not that long ago. Like we had spent Christmas and this entire week together. What day is it? That’s what she's calling for?

I stifle a sigh, glancing at my phone’s calendar, “What do you mean? It’s the fi…” The phone says the same thing it did yesterday. 12/31/20. “No way…”

She gives an exhausted laugh. “I am going crazy over here… I’ve celebrated New Years’ twice, and this morning my dad asks if I’m ready for 2021. Please tell me I’m crazy.”

“Uh that's strange,” I scratch my head. Holy shit does that mean the other day I hadn’t been imagining it? That I really had already been through the 31st. Today is the third New Years’ Eve. “I… I don’t know what to say other…”

“Damn. I’m sorry Tae. I shouldn’t have called. This was dumb and I sound so stupid. I’m sorry I should leave you be…” I shake my head as if she could see, “hey, wait, wait, wait. You didn’t let me finish. Genuinely the same thing has happened to me but I thought I was just mistaken because I went to sleep early.”

She huffs, laughing out of relief, “Ha, I thought I was still drunk from the night before…”

“Sooo, what does this even mean?” I ask knowing she doesn’t know the answer.

“Well, my parents don’t seem to notice so I don’t really know.”

“Hoseok is the same way…” I add, wondering if he’ll call me again today. Shit does this mean I still have a flight tomorrow? If tomorrow ever comes. What the fuck.

“Sorry again, I don’t really know why I called you…” I frown at her words, “I… I guess you’re the only other person I could really ask.” Nothing makes any sense, and my head starts to pound from my thoughts jumbling in my head.

“It’s okay, I… don’t mind.” I cringe, unsure of what else to say. She doesn’t respond right away, probably thinking the same thing. It’s a heavy moment. There’s so much to say but neither of us are speaking. Even though she isn’t saying anything I can only imagine how she looks. She’s probably curled up on the couch in her pj’s, probably making the same face I am. Just sad. Which is dumb, if we’re both sad then obviously the argument shouldn’t have happened.

“Well, if this happens again I guess we are just fucked.” She kind of laughs, making me smile, but my face drops again as she continues, “I’ll leave you be then… Happy New Year’s Tae.”

“Mara…” The buzz of the phone line lets me know she hasn’t hung up. I close my eyes, trying to formulate my thoughts before I open my mouth. “I’m sorry.” I shake my head, feeling stupid, “You are more than enough, I…” My words get caught in my throat and I can’t finish my sentence.

“Me too.” She mutters.

I sniff, “Can we talk… like in person.” “I’ll try and tell my parents that talking to you is more important than the ball dropping.” She sighs, and regret washes over me. Her parents probably hate me. They had been in the house during the argument. My eyes fall to the floor. I really just fucked it up. “Where even are you?”

“Oh, this Hilton near a movie theater I think.”

“I shouldn’t have sent you out. I’m really sorry Tae, it’s probably not safe for you to just be in a hotel.”

I almost laugh, at least I know she’s worried about me. “I’m a grown man…”

“Tch I know it’s just… I shouldn’t have let you leave in a city you’ve never been okay.” After another moment, “Well I’ll come later. Just text me your room number yeah?”

I hum in answer and she hangs up. That went a lot better than I expected it to go.

As I step towards the door, I swipe my hands down my pant legs, hoping my hands aren’t sweaty, and hoping I don’t look nervous myself. God that shouldn’t even matter. Clearing my mind, I pull open the door to see Mara standing there awkwardly, with her hands folded together.

“Hey.” I mumble, leaning against the wall to make room for her in the tight entrance, gesturing for her to come in. Her eyes are shielded by her hair as she walks past me, but she wasn’t looking up at me anyway. After closing the door behind us we silently walk over to the couch, each taking a seat. In my lap my hands fumble with each other, and I bite down my lip. I guess it’s a bit more awkward trying to find the right words in person.

I nod a couple times, managing to psych myself up to start the conversation. “I… I’m really sorry Mara.” The words come out breathy as it finally feels right to say them to her.

She lifts her pointed chin to me with a small smile, shaking her head. “I accept your apology, and I’m sorry I took it too seriously.” Her body turns towards mine as she continues, “I’m not even sure why it really got me that mad because it was a dumb joke and it just hurt my feelings.”

“That's all that really matters, I hurt your feelings and that's a good enough reason to apologize.” I finally make eye contact, feeling comfortable talking to her again. Those eyes are just the same as they’ve always been. She’s not cruel. She has a kind heart and her eyes show that. Why am I acting a fool?

“If anyone should apologize…” She sighs looking around the room, “It’s me.” I look down at my hands still thinking. “God.” She sniffs, and I immediately bring my face up to see her crying. “That's such an awful thing to say.” She chokes out, hands covering her face. My mouth drops and I do what I would normally, scooch closer to her and wrap my arm around her. Her head continues to shake in disappointment with herself.

“Listen it’s…”

“No!” She pushes me away, looking at me, her eyes reddening already. “It’s not okay.” Her eyes squeeze shut, tears rolling down her cheek. Even if she did say it, my heart still pangs looking at her like this. “I… I didn’t mean it.” She shakes her head, frantically wiping at her face. “I can’t even believe that those words came out of my mouth.” Her face becomes hidden as she buries it away in her hands.

I turn my head away from her, unsure of what to say. It’s not like I can say I knew she didn’t mean it, because that would be a lie. I still feel like deep down she feels like her life would be easier without me. And honestly it probably would.

“Maybe you’re right though.” I whisper, surprised that the words came out of my mouth. I certainly didn’t mean them to, but they did. They just slipped, like the tears I hadn’t noticed forming in my eyes. I roll my eyes, wiping them away. No use in feeling pitiful. What was I to expect with this lifestyle? Maybe I’m just meant to be alone during this time.

“No… no.” She sniffles, realizing that her words had taken hold. “Oh Tae,” She sobbed, pushing herself into my chest. “I need you in my life. I can’t express how much you mean to me. I really didn’t mean it. I can’t even believe I said that.” Her tears soak through the fabric and I barely hug her back. Even if she wants me back in her life there has to be some backing behind her words. Moments of unhappiness.

“Tae listen to me.” Her fingers grasp at my collar, bringing my attention to her. Her brows were furrowed in anger as she pressed her fists into my chest. “I love you. There’s no one like you. I…”

My eyes roll away from her, doubtful. The tears flowed smoothly now, there was no stopping them. I press my fingers into my eyes, trying to see through the tears. It just doesn’t make any sense why she would say that and not mean it. “T… there has to be a reason.” I hiccup, attempting to push her away from me. “There has to be a reason you said it.” I blubber, hiding my face in my shirt sleeve. Wishing I could stop crying. Wishing I believed her.

I feel her wrapping herself around me, and taking my hands away from my face. Weakly I let them drop to my sides. Letting my lashes stick together by keeping my eyes closed.

“Kim Taehyung.” Her breath is hot on my face, as her soft fingers trace under my eyes. “There’s no reason.” She sniffs, “I love you.” She leans into me, our foreheads touching. “Please don’t keep what I said in your heart.”

My head slides away from her, resting on her collarbone, and taking heavy breaths. How can it not linger? This feeling.

“Please forgive me Tae.” She hugs me closer. Of course I can do that. That isn’t the problem. “I want to go into this year with you… I want to spend all the years of my life with you.” She rambles on, “You’re the best thing that ever happened to me.” I can’t respond, and so she continues, “please we can fix this…”

I sigh, collecting myself, and taking a deep breath against her skin. “Yeah.” It’s all I can muster, still not sure how I feel. It’s not like I don’t want to be with her, it’s just… Does she really want to be with me? I couldn’t live with the fact that she didn’t want to continue this but did anyway. I’m not even sure how I could forget this. I don’t want it to stay on my mind but I don’t think I’ll be able to help it. Though as we sit here, I’m just grateful to be in her arms.

“Hey” I open sticky eyes, to the someone poking my cheek softly. Mara’s swollen but soft eyes are looking into mine, us still glued to each other on the couch. We must have fallen asleep, I blink a few times, stretching my arm out from under her. She has a small smile, one that makes me melt. Speaking softly she pulls her phone around to me. “Look.” With squinted eyes from the bright screen I see that it's 11:58 pm. She sets the phone down, leaning on her hand, “We didn’t miss the ball drop. Do you maybe want to watch it?”

I smile whispering, “I thought you didn’t want to watch it a third time.”

She sits up shrugging, “it’s different this time.” Her eyes find mine, and then she immediately looks away, “Though I doubt this tv gets the right channels.” I shuffle up in my seat as she gets up, rolling her head over her shoulders.

After my mind has adjusted to being awake I stand, following her as she flips the tv on, scanning through the channels, though the time has already turned to 11:59. There's some news channels but they aren't showing the countdown.

“Dangit we are gonna miss it.” She whines, but only looking half upset.

I huff at her pout, quickly pulling up the ball drop on youtube. “See it’s that easy.” 25. 24.

Her teeth show in a smile as she curls around me, watching the ball fall on the tiny little screen. 19. 18. “Can we kiss?” She kinda laughs at herself after asking, her eyes falling to the floor. Though I’m shocked she asked.

“Yeah… of course.” She still seems hesitant, until I set the phone down on the bed, turning my attention completely to her. 10. 9.

She attempts to look in my eyes, but her’s just drag down to my chest once more. “I love you Tae.” 8. 7. My hand finds her chin, pulling it up slightly so our eyes do meet. And the blush forming on her cheeks makes me blush in return. Reminding me of the first time we kissed. 6. 5. I push my forehead onto hers, rubbing circles on her temples. 4. 3.

“I love you too.” 2. 1. And I pull her face into mine, our lips softly clashing. Making me miss her more, and never want to let go. But I do. Breathing softly onto each other’s faces, breaking into smiles.

She looks down to my phone with a grin, pulling it up to my face. “Look! It’s 2021!”

#bts #kim taehyung #kim taehyung is in love #kim taehyung is sad #bts angst #bts fic #bts au #kim namjoon #kim seokjin #park jimin #min yoongi #jung hoseok #jeon jungkook #taehyung smut #taehyung soft #taehyung drabble #bts drabble #taehyung oneshot

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let-it-raines · 4 years

Text

your wonder under summer skies (7/?)

Summer in Storybrooke, Maine means one thing for its residents: tourist season. This year, for Emma Swan and Killian Jones, it means relationships ending and friendships changing all the while they attempt to figure out just what their relationship is. It’s somewhere straddling the line between friends and lovers, and there’s no guarantee of a soft landing if they fall into new territory.

rating: mature

a/n: I have been taking a little social media break and will continue to do so, but when I’ve got 90% of this story written (I really have to get to finishing it, haha), it felt wrong to keep it from you guys. So I’m slipping in and posting a new chapter! All my love ❤️

ao3: beginning | current

tumblr: 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 |

-/-

“Do you want some of my chips?”

“Hmm?”

“My fries,” Killian corrects. “Do you want some of them?”

“Is that rhetorical question?”

Killian sighs and rolls his eyes before pushing his basket of fries toward her. “Half the time that I offer you my fries, you say no because you’d rather have onion rings. Though, a part of me is surprised you haven’t simply taken over and started eating them without asking.”

Emma reaches over and picks up a fry, dipping it in the ketchup before popping it in her mouth. “Look, just because onion rings are obviously the superior side for junk food doesn’t mean I don’t appreciate a well done French fry. And this? This is a well done fry. “Skipper barks at Emma’s feet. “See, Skipper agrees with me.”

“Skipper agrees because he wants you to feed him.”

“He can have my leftovers.”

“Bloody hell no he cannot.” Killian snatches the basket away from her. “I’m sharing my food. You hear that, Swan? It’s mine. You can’t be giving it away to the dog.”

“You should have gotten me some lunch, too.”

“I didn’t know you were coming over.”

“Did I not text you?”

“No, love, I don’t believe I got your booty call.”

Emma picks up another fry and points it in Killian’s face. “This is not a booty call. You’re working, and I’ve got work in thirty minutes. We’re taking the kids to do a relay race on the beach this afternoon, and I don’t think my body can take jumping out the window again.”

Killian chuckles and slides the basket of fries back to him. “I’m going to build you a ladder out of my bedroom.”

“I think that would be a little obvious.”

Killian shrugs. “So, a relay race with dozens of kids. Good to know that I need to avoid the beach.”

“You just wait until we do the weekend festival for Labor Day. Then you’ll really want to avoid the beach.”

“I already have it noted in my calendar.” Killian’s eyes glance up and down her face before landing down at the top of her shirt. The man can be as subtle as a whisper, but sometimes he doesn’t even try. “You know, I can do a lot in thirty minutes.”

Emma scoffs and keeps eating her fries. Okay, Killian’s fries, but he’s sharing so now they’re definitely hers. “I know you can, but I actually look presentable today, and I tend to look not presentable after, you know…”

“After I ravish you?”

Her stomach swirls, and the way Killian’s licking his lips certainly doesn’t help. They could go to the back office or go up to his bedroom right now. It wouldn’t be a big deal. She could let him do all the effort. And as much as she wants to, she really didn’t come here to have sex.

Then again, she doesn’t know why she came here. There was no way she could know that he was going to have food.

Wait no. She came here because it’s been a week since she’s seen him, and she needed someone to complain to about this family that’s in town that takes up all of the booths at Granny’s at least twice a day. She doesn’t treasure much in her life, but she treasures her booth at Granny’s.

But she’s gotten her complaining out, filled him in on everything she hasn’t texted him this week, and really, what else do they have to do?

“Where’s Liam?”

“He’s meeting with the harbormaster.”

Perfect.

“Do not touch my hair,” she tells him. “You do all of the work.”

“Don’t I always do all of the work?”

She tosses a fry at him. He misses it, and Skipper gets up from his spot to get the food. “Considering the fact that I know you like me on top, I’d think not.”

“I also like you on your knees when – ”

The bell to the shop rings behind her, and Emma sees Killian’s face before she turns around. The smirk disappears, his lips falling into a flat line, and all of the mirth in his eyes vanishes along with the crinkles around his eyes.

What the hell?

Is Liam back? She really hopes Liam isn’t back because she does not want to deal with his icy stares and snide comments today.

And then she turns around on the stool she’s sitting on, fry still in her mouth, and sees Isabella Greene.

Oh wait, she went by Tink, didn’t she? Yeah, she definitely went by Tink, which is such an awful nickname, but that’s probably not what she should be focusing on.

Emma’s stomach does that weird flipping thing again and she quickly chews the fry before pushing her hair off her shoulders and straightening her shoulders. What the hell is Tink doing here?

“Tink,” Killian whispers before clearing his throat. “Uh, hello, love. I didn’t – I didn’t know – ”

“You didn’t know I was coming back?”

“I thought you were in New York.”

“I am. I’m not here for the summer or anything. My dad didn’t rent out the house this week, so I’m here with a few friends for the week. You’re not renting out the boat are you?”

Killian can’t stop blinking, and Emma swears that if he didn’t have any semblance of self-control, his mouth would be wide open.

“Let me check. I don’t think it is.” He turns to the computer, hits a few buttons, and Emma takes her eyes away from him to see Skipper walking toward Tink. Tink immediately bends down and scratches his head, murmuring toward him. “You should be good to take it out. It is rented for next weekend, so you’d have to return it by Thursday morning for maintenance.”

“We can do that. Do I need to fill out any paperwork?”

“It’s your dad’s boat, lass.”

“So that’s a no?” she laughs, and Emma swears the woman bats her eyelashes at Killian.

Is batting eyelashes a real thing that works on men? She doesn’t think she’s ever attracted anyone by batting her eyelashes.

“That’s a no. You’ve still got the spare key, aye?”

“I do.”

“Then you’re all set.”

Killian flashes his most charming smile, and Emma doesn’t know if she’s ever felt so invisible. Skipper isn’t even acknowledging her anymore, and Emma is about to demolish all of Killian’s fries in the span of two minutes. Maybe that’s why no one is acknowledging her. She’s some kind of fry hog.

“Thank you, Killian.” Tink leans over the counter in a move Emma’s seen a million times. Hell, she’s done it herself. That works a hell of a lot better than eyelashes. “If you want to grab dinner sometime, you have my number.”

Killian’s eyes finally glance at Emma, but it’s brief. If she hadn’t been paying attention to him, she wouldn’t have noticed.

“Last time I checked, you had a boyfriend.”

“Last time I checked, that didn’t seem to bother you.”

Holy shit, the balls on this woman.

Killian’s jaw clenches, and he’s definitely grinding his teeth now. This is not how she thought this conversation was going to go. She thought she was about to end up as a major third wheel when three minutes ago she was going to be the one with her shorts pulled down and Killian thrusting into her.

But it would be fine if he wanted to sleep with his ex instead. Emma has purposely never learned about his flings, knowing they’re never going to last, but she knew Tink enough to recognize her and to know that if one of them was going to, it was going to be her. She had no idea why it ended, though, and now that she kind of does, she definitely feels like she shouldn’t be here.

Would it be more awkward to get up and leave right now or to stay?

Did Killian know Tink had a boyfriend when he was sleeping with her? Because if he did…oh fuck, if he did she might just have to punch him. She used to think things like that weren’t any of her business, but then Neal and Tamara happened and…no, she’s not going to go there. She hasn’t let her mind fully go there in the month that she’s been broken up with Neal, and she’s certainly not going to do it now.

“Last time I checked,” Killian grits out, “I was unaware of your attachment.”

Oh.

“He and I were on a break then.”

“Are you now?”

Tink clicks her tongue. “We’re having some issues.”

Oh God, this really is the most awkward Emma has felt in years, and an entire town knows her boyfriend cheated on her and stares at her every time she walks down Main Street. It may have been a month, but the news just broke last week. It has been like reliving it all over again.

At least she hasn’t seen Neal. She’s avoided him at all costs.

Maybe not having her regular seat at Granny’s is a good thing.

“Return the boat by nine on Thursday, Ms. Greene. Have a good week with your friends.”

Tink scoffs, her lips parting, and she leans back and crosses her arms over her chest.

Oh shit, Jones. That was bold.

And then Tink is turning around and walking out the door, the bell ringing behind her.

Emma doesn’t know what to say. Does she say anything at all? What can she say? She just witnessed something she definitely wasn’t supposed to see, and she is not good enough with emotions to be able to deal with this.

Where’s Mary Margaret and her emotional intelligence when Emma needs her?

Even if Emma wants to strangle Mary Margaret half the time when she’s giving some unrealistic perspective on love and relationships.

She could use some of that right now.

“How much time do we have until you have to be at work?” Killian asks as he stands from behind the desk.

“Um, twenty minutes now.”

He tilts his head back toward the office before walking past her and flipping the sign on the door over. “That’s enough time, don’t you think?”

There’s fury in his eyes, and he’s never looked taller to her than he does right now as he looks down at her with his jaw so tight she can see it clenching. He’s angry, she realizes. He’s angry that Tink came in here and tried to start something back up. She has never taken him for the type to get angry about something like that. He’s Killian. He’s got a hell of a temper, gets pissed off when he sees some kind of injustice happening, but he’s always been easygoing when it comes to relationships.

Maybe she really doesn’t know him as well as she thought.

Or, at least, maybe she doesn’t know this facet of his life.

“That’s enough time.”

Killian grabs her hand and pulls her up from her chair. She nearly stumbles, but his grip is strong enough to keep her steady. They walk quickly out of the front office and to the back, where Killian quickly closes the door and turns the lock before he’s on her, caging her in and hovering his lips right over hers while his hands push against the wooden frame. His breathing is so heavy, his chest heaving, and she’s so distracting by it that she barely notices the way her own chest is moving up and down with anticipation.

“You’re gorgeous, you know,” Killian whispers into her ear. His breath is hot as it tickles down her skin. “I’ve thought that since the day we met, but I’ve never been able to tell you the way that I wanted to.”

“You definitely could have.”

“Aye, but you wouldn’t have taken it well.”

“Who says I’m taking it well now?”

Killian laughs into her neck while he rolls his hips into hers. Emma gasps as heat curls between her thighs, licking across her skin. Her heart is pounding, and her head is still reeling. She wasn’t expecting this, then she was, and it’s been back and forth so quickly that maybe she should stop thinking all together.

Hell, she definitely should.

Not thinking means she doesn’t have to focus on the big demons in her head or the smaller ones that are telling her that sleeping with Killian might not be her best idea.

Not thinking means that she can let Killian run his lips across her neck before his teeth tug down on her earlobe. The moment he figured out that she liked that, she was a goner.

The moment they first did this, she was a goner for the way that it feels and the way that she can only focus on the feel of his lips and his hands and of every inch of him covering her. Killian keeps rolling his hips into her, and the friction of the zipper on his jeans his hitting just the right spot.

“Shit,” Emma mumbles as her head tilts back to hit against the door. “Take off your pants.”

“A little busy at the moment, love.”

Suddenly, she notices that his hands are at her waist and fumbling with the zipper on her shorts. She hears it slide down, feels Killian push her shorts and her underwear down, and then his hands are on her exactly where she wants him.

Well, almost. They’re on a bit of a time crunch, so they don’t exactly have time to take it slow.

Her hands reach between them as Killian’s lips fiercely press into hers. He’s determined with each slide of his lips and swipe of his tongue. There’s no laziness or slow exploration, and as much as she likes that, this feels too damn good to stop.

His hand stops hers, and she pulls back from the kiss. “What are you doing?”

“Let me take care of you.”

“What about – ”

“We’ll make up for it at some other time, yeah?”

Emma pulls her bottom lip between her teeth and swallows the lump in her throat. She’s so damn frustrated right now that she can’t imagine saying no.

Not that Killian lets her. His determination continues as he bends down until he’s on his knees and his hand and his lips are working her higher and higher until air is escaping her so that it’s difficult to breathe. Fuck, he’s good at this, and she doesn’t want it to stop.

Pretty much ever.

“Just like that,” Emma groans as her head tilts back to the door. Her knees are getting a little weak, her legs shaking, and she reaches forward to curl her fingers into his hair. “Oh, fuck.”

Her releases crashes over her in small waves, and her legs shake a little more until Killian’s free arm wraps around her and holds her up, pressing her further back into the door. There’s sweat prickling at her temples, and her heart is definitely going to do something unnatural that’s going to put her in the hospital.

She would rather die than tell Whale that she’s in the hospital because of an orgasm.

Damn. Just damn.

“Swan, if you don’t release my hair soon, I’m going to have a bald spot.”

Emma blinks and releases her hand from Killian’s hair, smoothing it down as he helps tug her shorts up. Slowly, he stands from the ground until they’re almost eye-to-eye, and the idiot has the biggest smirk on his face.

At least he’s no longer furious.

“Hey,” Emma hesitates, “so about earlier with Tink – ”

“That’s a story for another time,” he quickly interrupts as he scratches behind his ear. “Why don’t you go to the restroom and straighten yourself up? Wouldn’t want any of the kids asking why you look a wee bit off.”

“Oh, yeah, okay. I’ll go do that.”

Killian’s not in the main part of the office when she finishes up in the bathroom. Skipper is still sitting behind the desk, but she barely looks up when Emma walks by.

Huh.

She’d go upstairs and look for him, but she really had to go and get to work. Mary Margaret will kill her if she’s late, and she’d really rather not be murdered, especially since David will definitely cover things for Mary Margaret.

It’s not a long walk to the club, so Emma’s still the slightest bit shaky when she gets there. Mary Margaret, Ashley, and Aurora are all there and wrangling kids, each of them in matching t-shirts to coordinate teams. Emma’s the green team, and her kids look like they’ve gone crazy with the way they’re running around.

No wonder their parents pay an exuberant amount of money to leave their kids with someone else while they lounge on the beach or work from home while indulging in as many margaritas as possible.

Emma always wonders if these kids care that they don’t spend time with their parents or if they’re too young to truly realize it at the moment.

“Why do we do this?” Emma asks as she walks up to the deck.

“Because we like paychecks.”

“And the children,” Mary Margaret adds in with a bright smile on her face.

“You should have been a teacher, Marg.”

“If I had gone to school, maybe I would have. This pays better, though, and like Ashley, I’m about the paycheck.” Her eyes narrow at Emma. “Did you walk here from your apartment? Your cheeks are flushed.”

“It’s a hot day and I haven’t gotten my tan yet. That’ll happen. You guys ready to go?”

The kids end up loving the relay race.

It’s exhausting, overwhelming, and Emma ends up was an ass full of sand. But it’s so damn fun that Emma doesn’t really care about the craziness of the kids or the way that they didn’t filled up on sugar beforehand.

Okay, she cares a little bit.

But by the time they’re finished, the kids are all exhausted, and Emma and Mary Margaret send them back to the kid’s clubhouse with Ashley and Aurora while the two of them go back to their offices and catch up on emails and phone calls before opening up wedding files for all of their couples this summer. They’ve got a weddings and rehearsal dinners almost every weekend until the middle of September, and right there on the middle weekend is Liam and Elsa’s wedding. They’d wanted to do Labor Day, but that was impossible with the party the club does and all of the town’s labor day weekend festivities. Everything was booked, and there was no way Emma or Mary Margaret could have been there as guests even if they squeezed them into a ballroom.

Elsa said there was no way she wasn’t having the two of them there. Liam would probably not want Emma there, and she swears there was disappointment on his face when they found another weekend.

Ass.

Emma has to take a deep breath and close her eyes as she looks at her calendar. It’s too much looking this far ahead. It’s too much, and she desperately needs to zoom back in and be a little more narrow-sighted.

She can do this.

She’s handled a hell of a lot of stuff that’s been more difficult than this job.

And this is a job. It’s good pay and stable. She loves her coworkers, and she doesn’t actually mind dealing with wealthy people all day or her awful boss or couples who are way too into each other planning their weddings.

She hasn’t been bitter about people getting married and her having to plan it for the entire time she’s worked here, and she’s certainly not going to be bitter about it now because she broke up with Neal. In the back of her mind, she used to hope and wish and maybe…but no. She’s never needed that kind of commitment. If you love someone and want to be with them, you make the commitment and you stay. It doesn’t matter if there’s a piece of paper legalizing that commitment.

Not that Neal was committed.

Obviously not.

“Hey, this says you have tomorrow off,” Mary Margaret says as she looks at Emma from over the top of her computer.”

Emma blinks and shakes her head before pushing her hair back in its ponytail. “I worked Monday this week, so I took tomorrow off to make up for it. I’ll be back to our normal schedule next week.”

“Oh, good, because David was thinking of us hosting a barbecue next Saturday.”

“Next Saturday is Killian’s birthday.”

“Oh shit. Is it?”

“Mhm.” Emma rolls her chair across the office to the mini fridge to grab her bottle of water. “So, unless you want to have the barbecue be his party, I think it’s going to have to be another day.”

“I’ll text Liam and ask if they have any other plans.”

“Why not ask Killian? It’s his birthday?”

“Oh, good point. I guess it’s not a surprise. It’ll have to be late since we all work on Saturdays.”

“Supply us all with coffee and alcohol, and I think we’ll all be able to stay awake.”

“Perfect.”

-/-

When Emma finally gets to leave at nine that night, she’s starving. She didn’t get the chance to sneak into the kitchen and steal some food for dinner, and she’d do awful things for a grilled cheese from Granny’s. Emma makes them at home all the time, but it’s never quite the same. After getting her car out of the parking lot for the public beach, she back downtown to, passing by the packed Rabbit Hole and pulling into Granny’s parking lot only to realize whose car she’s parked next to.

What the hell?

No. Just no.

She is not going in there are dealing with him tonight. Ruby said he’d been hanging around a lot to spend time with Tamara, but Emma thought that was Ruby overexaggerating. Emma hasn’t run into him once, but here he is.

Fuck.

Emma leans down to rest her head against her steering wheel before slowly peaking back up. Neal is right in front of her. He’s sitting in a booth with his dad, Tamara next to him, and Emma nearly vomits at the smiles on all of their faces.

That’s not supposed to be happening.

Tamara is just supposed to be the girl he’s fucking. She’s not supposed to be someone who he’s smiling with and who his dad has dinner with.

Emma barely ever did that.

She didn’t want to. She didn’t trust his dad. She still doesn’t. He’s not a good guy, he creeps Emma out, and she didn’t want to get anywhere near him if his pawn shop does end up being as shady as everyone thinks.

She worked too damn hard to have good things in her life to get pulled down by association.

What the hell is Neal doing?

Was it…did he have feelings for Tamara while he was still with her? Was it more than just someone to sleep with? Because Emma could deal with it when it was just physical. She could push past that. Hell, she did while she still stayed with him. If it was more, though, she’s not sure that she’s up for that.

From the way that her heart is pounding, she knows that she isn’t, that it was more between the two of them.

Fuck.

Emma slaps her hand down, and the horn on her bug goes off.

No.

No, no, no, no, no.

She quickly ducks down and hides herself. They’ve got to be looking out at the parking lot, and maybe if they don’t see her in the car, they won’t think it was her. Her car isn’t exactly inconspicuous, but someone else could drive the same way. The place is full of tourists and outsiders right now. The odds of someone else driving a bright yellow bug have to be pretty good.

Or maybe he’ll think that she’s at the Rabbit Hole but that parking was full so she put her car over here.

Or maybe he’ll know that it’s her and that she’s currently hiding in her own car as if she was the one who ruined her relationship.

What the hell is she doing hiding from him? He should be the one hiding from her, not sitting in her favorite restaurant eating with his dad.

Of course, Tamara does work there, and it’s not like Emma can get the woman fired.

Or could she?

No, that’s wrong. Tamara knew Neal was with Emma, but it’s all on Neal. She’s not going to be the girl who blames the other woman and not the scumbag man.

She’s also not going to be the girl who goes inside the restaurant when she’s had a long day and doesn’t want to fake pleasantries or be the talk of the town’s gossip mill tomorrow. As quietly as she can, Emma turns the key in the ignition and pulls out of the parking lot without looking back at Granny’s. That way she’ll never know if Neal saw her or not, and that’s the only thing that will keep her sane.

She ends up driving in circles around Storybrooke and goes through a drive-thru to get herself a cheeseburger. It’s not the same as going to Granny’s, but it’s good for now. Really, she should go home, clean up a little bit, and go to bed, but she can’t seem to bring herself to. Instead she uses up half a tank of gas aimlessly driving while trying to control her breathing. It’s pretty much a lost cause when each breath is shallower than the next and soon she finds herself in a service station parking lot with her phone in hand typing out a text she definitely shouldn’t be typing out.

He answers back within a few minutes, and his car is pulling up next to hers a quarter of an hour later. He’s silent as he slides into the passenger seat, but she appreciates that. She’s not really sure what she wants to say.

Instead she stares at the tattoo inked across his forearm.

Ever tried. Ever failed. No matter. Try again. Fail again. Fail better.

She’s always liked that tattoo of his. It’s mixed within all the angry red scars that map out his skin, and there’s something beautiful about the words coexisting with proof of an accident. Maybe one day she’ll hear the story, but for now, all she knows is those words.

Emma’s not sure if she’s getting to fail better or if it’s just the same thing over and over again.

Killian’s slushie is half empty by the time she finally speaks.

“I’m sorry about Tink showing up at your office earlier.”

“It was nothing.”

“Superpower,” Emma murmurs. “And I don’t even need it to tell that’s a lie.”

“I apologize for how I acted afterward. I shouldn’t have…hell, Emma, I shouldn’t use you like that.”

She twists in her seat and turns toward him, resting her cheek against the headrest. “We’re using each other physically. We both know that.”

Killian nods and mimics her movement. “Aye, I know, but on occasion, when I have the chance to think, I realize that sometimes I can be too gruff and too impulsive. Our friendship is first, and I sometimes forget that when I need to release some of the tension.”

“I don’t mind. I promise. I’m the same way. It’s why this is working.”

“What happened tonight that you called me here? It’s nearly midnight.”

“We’ve been here at three in the morning before. Midnight is nothing.”

A smile tugs at the corner of his lips, but it just as quickly faltered. “Swan.”

It’s so simple, the way he says he last name so frequently, but he could get her to tell him just about anything just like that.

“What did I do wrong to make Neal cheat on me? I know we had drifted apart at the end, that we weren’t sleeping together as much, but I still didn’t…the thought never crossed my mind to cheat on him. And when I found out about it the first time, I let it go. I figured it was physical. But he’s in a relationship with her, and for some reason that makes it all worse.”

So, she went there. Finally. And she doesn’t know whether or not it feels better to get it all off her chest.

“The first problem, love, is thinking there’s any fault of your own.” Killian reaches forward and tucks her hair behind her ear before swiping his thumb across her cheek. “As much as Neal had his moments, I thought he was an asshole. You have always deserved better than someone who puts your down and who betrays your trust like he did. It hurts like hell to be betrayed like that, but you’re going to be better for it.”

“When?”

“I don’t know.”

Emma blinks and closes her eyes as she makes another attempt to calm her breathing. “Is that how you felt with Tink?”

His tongue clicks. “I had feelings for her, but it wasn’t like it was for you and Neal. Most of the betrayal there was because of something in my past.”

“Oh?”

“Aye, but that’s a story for another time.” His hand runs along her neck until she can feel him gently tugging on some of the strands on her ponytail. “I’m actually a bit glad to see that you’re upset over Neal.”

She opens her eyes then. “You’re glad to see I got my heart broken?”

“If it can be broken, that means it still works.”

Emma swallows the lump in her throat and tries to keep her eyes focused on Killian’s, but his stare is so intense that she squirms and looks down back at his arm and at all of the ink that scatters his skin. It’s safer there. He can’t read her as easily. He’s always been able to do that and has called her out on her shit when he needs to, and she usually appreciates it.

She doesn’t know what she thinks right now.

“Sometimes I don’t want it to work,” she quietly admits as cars keep driving by the two of them, headlights brightening before fading away.

“But it does, love, and I swear to you, one day you’ll want it to again.”

-/-

@qualitycoffeethings @mrtinski @klynn-stormz @scarletslippers @jonirobinson64 @snowbellewells @therealstartraveller776 @thejollyroger-writer @sherifemma @shardminds @captainsjedi @galaxyzxstark @galadriel26 @idristardis @karenfrommisthaven @teamhook @spartanguard @searchingwardrobes @itsfabianadocarmo @jamif @shireness-says @ultimiflos @nikkiemms @resident-of-storybrooke @onepunintendid @bluewildcatfanatic @superchocovian @killianswannn @carpedzem @captainkillianswanjones @mayquita @jennjenn615 @onceuponaprincessworld @a-faekindagirl @scientificapricot @xellewoods @ultraluckycatnd @stahlop @kmomof4 @tiganasummertree @singersdd @tornadoamy @cluttermind @lfh1226-linda @andiirivera

#your wonder under summer skies #cs fic #cs ff #cs fanfic #captain swan fic #captain swan ff #captain swan fanfic #captain swan

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kaunis-sielu · 4 years

Text

What’s Next: 4

A/n: This fic requires YOUR help. At the end of each chapter there will be a bolded question where you, the reader, get to pick what happens next. In order for this fic to be a success you need to help me out.

Send AN ASK by Thursday 9/17 to have your vote counted.

—————————————————————————

“Oh what the hell why not. Probably safer with you than I am with a Lyft driver.” You tell him and he gives you a little smile.

“So, do you volunteer the same day every week?” He asks leaning against the wall as you wait for the car.

“No, since I own Drink, Love, Coffee I don’t have a set schedule. I try to come a couple times a month though. How many days can you do the volunteer thing?”

“Two a month.”

“Wow, your boss is generous.”

“I mean not really.”

“Two days a month to get to hang out with animals sounds awesome. If I had the power to ask my employees to volunteer places I would.”

“I wanted to do once a week but we couldn’t make it work.” Steve says with a shrug, “Fury and I compromised.”

“So, CEO huh?” He looks embarrassed for a second but nods, “I worked with Fury overseas for a couple years and when we were both state side he wanted to start Avengers Inc and I was in.”

“What kind of clients do you usually work for?”

“Pretty much everything, stores, warehouses, homes, individual people. Why?”

“There have been a couple of break ins around the shop and I’ve considered getting a system put in.” A sleek black car comes rolling into the parking lot and Steve pops up off the wall.

“This is us.” He tells you shoving his phone into his pocket. “What kind of system are you thinking about?” He asks pulling the back door open for you, he gestured you wordlessly into the car.

“Price is the first concern, I’d love something with a couple cameras but I have a feeling that’s gonna be out of my price range.”

“Don’t write it out just yet.”

“Sorry to interrupt but where am I going?” Happy asks from the driver’s seat.

“Oh, sorry!” You tell him your address and he just nods and pulls out of the shelter’s parking lot. “What exactly do you do? Do you just fill proposals and deal with clients?”

“I’m lucky and get to be pretty hands on. I do kinda everything from meeting new clients to personal security. I’m licensed to carry anywhere a cop can.”

“Do you like working personal security.”

“Depends on the client,” he says with a grin, “I’ll be working with you and I have a feeling we’re going to work really well together.”

“I don’t know, I can be a real pain in the ass.” You tease and he laughs.

“If you’d like, I can swing by tomorrow or Monday and take a look and come up with a plan.”

“You don’t need to do that, I’m sure you’re going to be busy.”

“It’s not a problem Doll.” He assures you with a smile.

“Are you sure?”

“Absolutely, why don’t you give me your number and we can set up a time when I have my schedule in front of me?”

“You don’t keep it on your phone?”

“He’s a Luddite!” Happy says from the front and you laugh at the irritated look on Steve’s face.

“I mean he’s not wrong,” Steve grumbles and you laugh.

“I get it, I use both my phone and a paper planner. It helps me remember.” You tell him digging your bullet journal out of your bag.

“See Happy, it’s not weird!” Steve cries and you laugh again, god he’s easy to be around. “Do you want to give me your number or I can give you a card?”

“I can give you mine. Just text me who you are so I’m not confused later.” He chuckles as he pulls his phone out of his pocket and passes it to you to punch in your number then hand it back. A few moments later you get a text that just says Steve Rogers.

“Thank you so much for your help today.” Steve says with a soft smile as you roll to a stop in front of your brownstone, “I’ll give you a call Monday.”

“Sounds good, thank you for your offer to help.” You climb out and are pleased when they wait until you’ve unlocked your front door to pull away.

You take Saturday off but go in and cover the Sunday morning shift. Sunday mornings are your favorite, they only last until one and then you close, do prepping for the next week and head home somewhat early.

You’ve sent both Nat and Wanda home for the day, have one headphone in as you order coffee for next week. The dough is all rising, you have to wait to add in anything until it’s risen once then you add in chocolate chips or fruit or whatever then shape and put them onto pans that go into the walk-in fridge for the week. Sometimes you have to make more or have specials through the week but your customer base is pretty predictable at this point. You’ve got two more types of coffee to order when you hear the noise. It doesn’t register at first what it is, it’s not until you pull out your headphone and listen that you realize someone else is in the shop. You unplug your headphones and shove your phone into your bra then creep out of the office. Your heart sinks when you see two men in the main part of the bakery. The door has been broken open, but they haven’t seen you yet. You debate going back into the office but if there here to steal from you they’re going to go to the office. Instead you slip into the walk-in fridge and hurry to the very back where you crouch down next to the cold wall. You move a couple of the rolling trays that have the baking sheets of goodies on them pull your phone from your bra. You’re about to call for help when you hear a scraping noise from outside, there’s a loud thud and you realize what’s happened.

You’ve been locked into the fridge. The intruders must have seen you and locked you in.

You could call Steve, but who knows how long it could take him to get here. You know Bucky has a gun too, you’d felt it while you rode behind him on his bike. But you don’t want to get him in danger, Steve is trained for this.

So, who do you call for help? Steve or Bucky?

Tag list:

@memyselfandmaddox @thefanficfaerie @patzammit @dsakita @dramadreamer14 @killcomet @thesassmisstress @andahugaroundtheneck @loving-life-my-way @thefridgeismybestie @dumblani @silverkitten547 @im-just-another-monster @mywinterwolf @scuzmunkie @giggleberts @biskwitmamaw @paintballkid711 @also-fangirlinsweden @abschaffer2 @geeksareunique @lumar014 @connie326 @inkedaztec

#steve rogers #captain america #bucky barnes #steve rogers x reader #imagine steve rogers #steve rogers imagine #imagine captain america #avengers #imagine avengers #imagine bucky barnes #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes au #steve rogers x reader au #steve rogers au #bucky barnes x reader au #avengers au #what’s next story

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steves-on-a-plane · 4 years

Text

Run. (Pt. 4)

Part One /Part Two / Part Three /

Run. (Pt. 4)

Words: 1517 Pairing: Tony Stark & Reader Timeline: Iron Man [2008] Other Info: Run AU Summary: After reuniting with Tony for the first time in 3 months, he whisks the reader off in a get away jet, but they’re not bound for New York just yet. A/N: Expect Chapter 5 to be up on or before Wednesday May 27th!

May 2008

“We can’t go to into an airport looking like this.” You told Tony. “We’ll raise more than a few eyebrows with you covered in mud and me in this rediciulous wedding dress.”

“Well that’s why I own my own plane.” Tony reminds you. “Happy can drive right up to the plane, I’ve got spare clothes there. I’m sure there is something that will fit and we’ll buy more clothes when we get to our final destination.”

“Final destination? Aren’t we going back to New York?” You asked him.

“Not quite yet. I’ve got a lot of work to do now that I’m back.” Tony sighs. “So we’re taking the weekened…sort of. I’ll get 3 days alone with my girls and we’ll fly back to New York on Thursday morning. Think of it as an apology for the weekend we didn’t get together before.”

“Tony, I’ve already told you, you have nothing to apologize for.” You lean forward and kiss him on the cheek. “You said you’ve only been back for a day. Won’t people be worried if you disappear for again?”

“All the people who matter will either be with me or know where I am.” He answered. “You, Serina, Pebbles. Happy is here as my Head of Security and Pepper knows our full itinerary. I promsed her I’ll be in regular contact with her the entire time. She worries.” He rolled his eyes.

“You do you remember that you were kidnapped the last time she left you at an airport right?” You tried to sympathize with Pepper.

“Believe me, I very much remember.” Tony told you quietly. There was a flicker in his façade where just for a second Tony looked very serious. He looked out the window, but when he noticed you staring with concern he smirked.

“Do you want to talk about it? Can you talk about it?” Tony looks over at you, and seems to think for a couple minutes.

“Not yet.” He gave your hand a reassuring squeeze. “But I’m okay.” He promised. “Just give me the three days.”

“Okay.” You nodded, hesitantly. “Three days and then we talk about it. I’m going to hold you to that.”

“Tony, we’re here!” Happy called, never taking his eyes off the road. The limo drove up a narrow access road that eventually led directly out to the tarmac at LAX.

Happy helped usher you into the plane while Tony carried Serina. Your eight year old daughter either managed to sleep through the entire ordeal or she’d gotten very good at pretending. Tony laid Serina across one of the couches in his jet. He tucked a pillow under her head and covered her in a new blanket.

“I don’t think I’ve got anything in her size.” Tony nodded at the small girl. “But I can at least get you out of that dress.” He winked at you before disappearing into the sleep cabin at the back of the plane. You watched Happy chat with the pilot confirming your destination and making sure arrangments would be made for someone to collect Tony’s limo. Tony returned wearing one of his old hoodies, a pair of jeans and a clean pair of sneakers. You noticed that his clothes seemed to fit a little baggier than usual, but you thought better than to mention it at the moment. He was carrying a pair of sweatpants and one of his old t-shirts.

“This’ll have to do Sweetheart.” He offered the clothes out to you.

“Thanks.” You accepted them. Then a sudden realization hit you. You’d had help getting into the dress. It was very possible you might need help getting back out of it. “Um, Tony…”

“You’ve been on the jet before, right?” He sat down in one of the empty chairs. “You can change right through there.” He pointed to the sleep cabin before coming to the same realization that you had. “Or I could help.” He offered.

Tony slid open the door to the sleep cabin and you stepped into the ulterior room. A queen sized been with hot rod red silk sheets and a red duvet took up most of the space in the sleep cabin. There were a few drawers built into the walls and a TV hanging opposite the bed.

“Where…should I start?” Tony asked awkwardly.

“This vail, please!” You begged him, tossing your spare change of clothes onto the bed.

“Ok, sit on the bed and hold still.” You did as Tony instructed. You could feel the pressure in your head relieving with each bobby pin he tugged out. “Okay, it’s out.” He said pulling the teeth of the veil’s comb out of your hair.

“That feels so much better already.” You breathed scratching your heard where a particularly painful pin had been wedged. “I could kiss you.”

“We’ll don’t thank me yet.” Tony said tugging you to your feet. “I still gotta figure out how to get you out of this contraption.” Tony spun you gently so that your back was to him. He untied the large white bow at the small of your back and began weaving the silk white ribbon out of the corset back of the dress.

“There’s buttons under here?” He exclaimed after loosing the ribbon from a handful of the fabric loops along your back.

“You have to undo all of the ribbon before you can even get to the bottons.” You explained.

“Yeah, I can see that.” Tony began to tug more adimently at the ribbon. He couldn’t understand why anyone would want to wear something so complicated. “Did you pick this straight jacket out yourself?”

“No,” You sighed. “My mother did.”

“Okay, well at our wedding, pick something that’s not so complicated, okay?” He suggested casually. He continued to yank at the ribbon. He was near the top now, so you moved your hair out of his way.

“Our wedding?” You repeated with an eyebrow raised. You tried to look over your shoulder and steal a glance at him. Tony gripped your shoulders and gently turned you away.

“Face forward, I’m working.” You caught the white ribbon sailing to the ground out of the corner of your eye. Tony started to work his way back down your back, undoing buttons. “Oh, c’mon there’s a zipper under these buttons! By the way, when I said wedding I meant…I don’t know what I meant.” He admitted. “But I thought about it, every day while I was gone. Would you ever consider it?”

“Are you seriously proposing to me on my wedding day after being presumed dead for three months?” Saying you were surprised was an understatement.

“No!” Tony promised, still pulling at bottons. “Sweetheart, If and when I propose to your for real it will be a lot more romantic than me helping you run away from a wedding with another man. I just want you to know that I’m open to getting married, some day. When you’re ready. If that’s what you want.”

“Well, I never thought I’d see a day where Tony Stark was reduced incoherent rambling.” You smirked to yourself. “Hows it coming back there?”

“Hold still, I’m finally at the zipper.” He instructed. Tony impaciently yanked the zipper of your dress. With the layers of fasteners finally undone, the heavy dress sank to the floor.

“You wouldn’t think something like that would bo so warm.” You shivered. Realizing now that you were still soaking wet but lacking a protective layer of clothing to keep you warm.

“You know I’m struggling here.” Tony confessed. “Because I’d hate for you to die of hypothermia but god I forgot how good you look naked.”

Tony reached out and brought a warm hand up to your cheek. His second hand came to rest on your hip pulling you closer to him. Tony leaned down and pressed his lips against yours. Your lips parted inviting his tongue inside. A knock at the door caused you and Tony to jump apart guiltily.

“Tony!” Happy’s voice called from the otherside. “The pilot’s ready to take off. He says everyone needs to be in their seats.”

“Okay!” Tony called, a hint of inrritation in his voice. “We’ll be right there. Should I stay and help?” Tony wiggled his eyebrows suggestively.

“I can dress myself, thank you, Tony.” You promised. “I’m just glad I thought ahead enough to bring a spare change of shoes.” You pulled sneakers out of your purse.

“Oh you remembered to grab shoes and a sweatshirt, but not pants?” Tony laughed.

“Acutally…”You sheepishly pulled out a pair of black leggings and a tshirt that you had also grabbed. “I knew if I let you think I didn’t have any other clothes you’d give me one of your t-shirts.” You grabbed the tshirt that Tony had lent you and put it on quickly. “And honestly your old MIT shirt is softer and more comfortable than any of mine!” You put your leggings on one leg at a time waiting for Tony’s response.

“It’s a real good thing I love you.” He said before kissing you on the cheek.

#Tony Stark #Tony Stark x Reader #Tony Stark Fan Fic #Tony Stark Fan Fiction #Tony Stark FF #Tony Stark Reader Insert #Run #Run AU

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pepperonijem · 4 years

Text

I. Plus One || Count on Me

I. Plus One → Count on Me masterlist

Pairing: Peter Parker x Reader

Warnings: none, this is just fluff I guess. Or, pre-fluff???

Word Count: 1.6k

Summary: .The beginning of it all. What else is there to say? (College AU)

A/N: I wrote this for @sebbbystaaan‘s 500 writing challenge! Thanks for letting me participate in this! :) My prompt was “Hey, we do what we do best. We improvise, all right?” from Fast and Furious 6. This is part one of a mini series!

“Alright, I’ll see you guys in two weeks,” the professor shouted over the cacophony of laptops being shut and backpacks opening. “Enjoy your spring break everyone!”

Peter let out a sigh of relief, thankful that this was he didn’t have to worry about calculus for the next week. He packed up his notebook and followed the exodus into the halls of the building. Peter paused by the small couch by the elevators, deciding to sit down and wait for the crowd to diminish rather than fight for a spot in the overcrowded elevator.

Unlike most of his classmates, Peter was in no rush to get out of the building. He had no plans to go back home over the week-long break. Happy and Aunt May were on a small vacation of their own and with Ned’s spring break not being until a few weeks later, Peter had made the decision to just stay on campus for the week. Peter’s big plans for the week mostly consisted of seeing how quickly he can learn to solve a Rubiks cube, and then maybe trying out the game he just bought, something about farming?

He passively scanned the bulletin board behind him, trying to pass the time as more people flooded the hall. Guitar classes, babysitting gigs, research studies, the usual. His eyes passed over each flyer but stopped on a sheet of notebook paper, hastily handwritten, with accents of neon highlighters around a phone number.

FAKE DATE NEEDED FOR A WEDDING. RSVP 555-0120. I’LL PAY YOU $50 AND YOU GET A FREE MEAL. SERIES INQUIRIES ONLY!!

Peter let out a chuckle and noticed that the date was this Friday. Figuring he had nothing better to do anyway, he pulled out his phone and began typing in the number, not realizing it was already in his phone.

(Y/N) from class

His eyebrows furrowed as he tried to remember what class he had you in, until a silly memory of a conversation the two of you had about trying to insert as many Spongebob references into your presentation as possible. Oh right, he recalled. She was in that French class I took last year. Your professor had assigned you to project groups at the beginning of the semester based on who you were sitting with, and it just so happened that you were the only two people who sat at the front row.

The first project you and Peter had together was an oral presentation in which you had to have a conversation in front of the whole class. The morning of the presentation, you and Peter noticed everyone else rehearsing and carrying out extensive scenes, whereas the two of you had agreed to wing it, not thinking seriously about the project at all. Funny enough, your presentation went smoothly, scoring high marks for the both of you. By the end of the semester, you two had become somewhat friendly with each other in class, but unfortunately, because you two were in different majors, it was the last class you had together.

Although Peter would never admit it, he was disappointed in himself for not ever asking you to hang out outside of the class. But now, he finally had a chance to do something about it.

Once he got back to his dorm, Peter dropped his backpack on the floor and flopped on his bed. He pulled out his phone and typed out a message, analyzing every word to make it sound as casual as possible.

Hey (Y/N), it’s Peter! We had French together last year. Um, I saw your flyer outside of my class, about the wedding. Do you still need a date? I don’t have any plans this break so uh, I thought why not?

Before he could think too hard about his wording, he hit send and set his phone face down in a terrible attempt to not freak out over a reply, but the thoughts flooded his brain anyway. Oh god, oh god what if she doesn’t remember me? Or worse what if she did remember me and now she thinks I’m a creep? “So I thought why not?” Come on Parker, you sound like you don’t care. Maybe she didn’t even--

A loud ding came from the other side of his mattress and he scrambled to flip over his phone.

4 new messages from (Y/N) from class

Peter unlocked his phone and checked the messages.

Yeah, I remember you! We did that Spongebob presentation! Also, yeah I definitely am in need of that date TBH I’m glad it’s you asking me because I was scared I was gonna get some weird messages. Anyway, if you’re not in class or anything can you meet me at the cafe in 10 minutes?

Peter replied a quick yes before slipping back out of his dorm room and headed towards the campus cafe, trying to let out his jitters before he saw you. Come on Parker, you’ve fought space aliens and literally saved the world, you can do this. He hyped himself up, and let out a deep breath before opening the door. The smell of fresh baked croissants and strong coffee enveloped him in a warm hug as he walked through and he immediately felt a wave of calmness wash over him as he walked over to where you were seated at a table in the back, tucked away from the chatter and sounds of the rest of the cafe.

“Hey,” you looked up from your laptop and smiled at Peter as he slid into the opposite side of the booth and slid his backpack off. “I got us a couple of cookies, but I don’t know if you like coffee or not so I didn’t get you a drink.”

“Oh don’t worry about it,” he waved it off. “Thank you for the cookies though, these are my favorite,” he said as he reached for one of the snickerdoodles. “So, why the fake date?” He asked.

“Right,” you began, taking a deep breath. “So funny story, my cousin is getting married next week, and one day when I was home I mentioned that I was working on a project with a guy, and somehow they assumed that I was talking about my boyfriend, and everyone was so excited so I didn’t have the heart to tell them no, and so blah blah a year later, they’re using this whole wedding to try to meet my… nonexistent… boyfriend. Which is where you come in!”

You grinned sheepishly as you stared at a wide-eyed Peter. Somewhere in your head, there was a voice saying that this was not a good idea, coming to a crescendo until Peter finally let out a laugh. You laughed with him, unsure of what he would say.

“I’m in,” Peter said with an excited smile.

The next couple of hours went by in a blur as you and Peter worked on the details of your fake relationship. From your first date, your anniversary, how Peter asked you out, what he got you for Christmas, for your birthday, you tried to cover as much as you can.

“Okay, well what happens if someone asks us something we forget to cover?” Peter asked nervously. “Or, or, what happens if I say the wrong thing, or we get our stories mixed up--”

“Hey,” you interrupted, flashing Peter a calming smile. “We do what we do best. We improvise, all right?”

Peter nodded, setting his pencil down and grabbed the last cookie.

“The trick is to base everything on as much truth as possible,” you taught him. “The more truth we tell, the less lies we have to remember.” You leaned back, somehow more relaxed than you probably should be in this situation. “We’re gonna do great, okay, Pete?”

With a full mouth, Peter returned your smile. Although he was extremely nervous, he had to admit, he was also excited. It was evident from your days in French class and the last few hours that the two of you had a pretty solid chemistry, as it was incredibly simple and fun to bounce ideas off each other. No idea was a bad idea between the two of you. Just silly ideas and good ideas, but nearly everything ended in laughter.

By the time you had finally finished planning, the sun was long gone. The two of you packed up your stuff and Peter walked with you back to the dorms, still not wanting the evening to end. He was hooked on your company, and the regret he felt from not pursuing your friendship sooner left him with the gnawing desire to have more than just this one fake date with you, to have this arrangement blossom into a real friendship, that goes beyond a classroom.

Once you finally arrived at your door, your conversation came to a slow stop. “This is me,” you sighed. “Thanks for walking me back, and uh, thanks for agreeing to help me with this crazy scheme.”

“It’s no problem at all,” Peter smiled at you. “This is gonna be fun, I can feel it.” Peter felt butterflies in his stomach, and he wasn’t sure if it was because of you or because of his anxiety, but he was excited nonetheless.

You let out a small chuckle. “I’ll see you on Thursday, for the rehearsal dinner?” you asked, still beaming at him.

Peter nodded and extended his hand for you to shake, as you rolled your eyes and gave him a quick hug instead. Oh they’re definitely because of her, he thought.

“It’s a date.”

#Tom Holland #Tom Holland fic #tom holland fluff #tom holland smut #tom holland angst #tom holland headcanon #tom holland x reader #tom holland x yn #Peter parker #spider-man #spiderman #spider man #peter parker fluff #peter parker angst #peter parker smut #peter parker fic #peter parker headcanon #peter parker x reader #jem speaks

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imnotwolverine · 4 years

Text

In sickness and in health

Henry Cavill x OC Lisa - multi-chapter fic

Author’s note: Lisa is overworked and sick as a dog, while Henry is the ever-loving, doting caretaker. A little fluffy fluff on the Thursday morning, because I couldn’t sleep (surprise Henry sneaking in on Snyder’s watch party, I hold you responsible).

Word count: 1.842

Disclaimer: fluff

This is part 15 of the Tea for Two story.

You can find the Masterlist here.

< Go back to part 14

‘You’re not okay,’ He said softly, pushing my boggling body back in the pile of pillows on the bed.

I knew he was right. I was somewhere in between a heavy cold and fever-town, but that definitely did not stop me from being obnoxiously stubborn. I wanted to go out for heaven’s sake! Right now my sexy heels should be carrying me through the restless city streets, ready to go to a party. To have fun! But no. It was New Year’s eve and here I was, sitting in bed, looking like a wet rag. And it sucked.

‘Well then at least you go. I won’t accept that I am spoiling this night for you too.’ I tried, my voice coming out too brittle for my liking. Henry’s face scrunched up. ‘You are a piece of work woman.’ He chuckled, giving me a loving look. ‘Thankfully..I can be just as stubborn as you are. And I. Am. Not. Leaving.’ ‘But Jason organised this whole party. And you so wanted to go. You’ve been talking about it for weeks now.’ ‘I know. But there will be more parties. And right now, you first need to get better.’ He cupped my cheek, trying to sooth away my frustrations.

I huffed in annoyance, moving my face away from his hand as I turned on my side, rolling away from him. ‘I hate this.’ I sulked, pulling up the blankets as I felt another cold shiver rush over me. Henry was quiet, his hand gently folding a bit of hair behind my ear, his eyes burning into the back of my head. ‘Can I get you anything love? Tea? Soup? ..A hug?’ His voice was gentle, unfazed by my moping.

I quietly shook my head, my head burning hotly beneath the blanket that I had dragged up to my chin.

It had been a while since I had felt so bad. Actually… Come to think of it. The last time was about a year ago, also during my holidays. I knew I was a bit of a workaholic. I knew I probably should take a few more weeks off in the year, to recharge. But then there always was this new cool project. Or I just couldn’t refrain myself from opening a few e-mails, which then totally escalated again to the point that I was having hour-long work calls. Yes. I was really bad at my work-life balance and my body paid the price.

I felt Henry’s body lift from the mattress as he got up again, his feet shuffling out of the bedroom as he let out the quietest sigh. From that sound alone I knew he was feeling upset and it made me feel crazy guilty. Guilty for him having to see me like this. Guilty for being the major cause of this. Why did I have to be so darn stubborn?

‘Henn?’ I called out feebly.

I heard his footsteps stop mid stairway.

‘Yes dear?’ He answered, his feet immediately moving back to the bedroom.

I rolled around so I could look at him.

‘I’m sorry.’

My jaw clenched as I saw him look at me with those big puppy eyes. It was more than evident that he was feeling worried about me, his nose flaring in discomfort as his eyes trailed over the small sweat drops on my temples.

‘Don’t be. Baby. Just..relax. Try to sleep a bit.’ He moved back to the bed and folded back the blankets, his hand picking up the washcloth from the nightstand, gently dabbing the sweat off my forehead. ‘No..I’m really sorry. This happens every time I take a holiday. My body just crashes. I… I work too much.’ I sighed, my eyes looking anywhere but at Henry, my hands fumbling with the covers. Henry sat down again on the edge of the bed, continuing to dab my head as the sweat drops kept rolling.

Gods I was feeling so shit. My head felt like a ton of bricks, my throat sandpaper and my muscles were aching so badly it felt like I had been hit by a truck.

‘I’m just so darn stubborn.’ I croaked, finally looking back at him. He smiled again. ‘Yes you are. And.. I like that, I do. Just not when you get ill because of it. I want to have you around for as long as is humanly possible, you know?’ His tender words made my heart buzz. ‘I know.’ I nodded slowly, rubbing my head into his hand and closing my eyes for a moment.

We stayed like that for a few minutes. His hand dabbing the sweat of my forehead as he began to hum a slow tune. I felt all worries wash away as the cold cloth gently travelled across my aching hot skin.

‘Could we at least move to the couch? I miss Kal.’ I hummed, finally opening my eyes again.

Henry chuckled. ‘If you promise me you’ll stay put.’ I shrugged. ‘Not like I can do much else.’

‘Okay then.’ He said, sitting back a bit so he could fold away the blankets. I pulled up my feet to get up, but before they even touched the floor I felt myself being scooped up by Henry. ‘I can walk.’ I protested, pouting my cracked lips. ‘And I.. like carrying you.’ He retorted, smiling smugly.

—

The tv was set to its lowest volume as we sat snuggled up on the couch. Henry was wearing a simple black sweater and jogging pants, his arms protectively wrapped around the pile of blankets I was wrapped in. I didn’t know whether I was comfortably toasty, or sick toasty, but I didn’t really care. Henry seemed more than a little happy he could have his arms around me and keep me safe. Ever the knight in shining armour.

‘Your mom told me you were a great fan of King Arthur and his knights when you were young.’ I said with my raspy voice, looking up at him as he peered at the tv. He sniffled, giving me a crooked smile. ‘I was..and still am by the way.’ His smile grew wider as he saw the amused look on my face. ‘How are you feeling?’ His hand brushed away some hair that was sticking to my forehead. ’Okay now. I don’t think I have felt this safe and cosy in my life.’ I snickered, nestling my head back in the nape of his neck.

‘Then I am doing a good job.’ He kissed the top of my head, resting his lips there before moving up ever so slightly. ‘What else did you talk about with my mum?’ His curiosity seeped through his semi-casual tone. I shrugged. ‘Girl things.’

‘Oh don’t give me that. We would have no secrets, right?’ The smile was evident in his voice. ‘Mmmm. Well I wasn’t the only one with secrets. You were pretty..open towards your mom about your secrets while I was asleep on your lap.’ I pushed myself up a bit, my arm shaking with effort. Immediately I felt Henry’s arm wrapping around mine, steadying me as my body trembled with effort. ‘Easy, easy.’ He whispered.

His eyes gave me a quick full-body scan to see if I was alright, before looking back into mine.

‘I’m okay.’ I confirmed with an amused tone as I laid a weak hand on his chest, a small smile tugging at the corners of my lips. Henry shifted slightly in his seat, careful not to shake me up, before licking his lips and looking back at me. ‘Well..I hope that didn’t catch you by..surprise..’ He breathed, checking my reaction. My smile grew wider. ‘No. But you were right about one thing..’ I looked down at my hand on his broad chest, my fingers grazing gently over the soft cable knit. He wore this sweater so often the threads were baring thin at some points.

‘We haven’t really spoken about it all that much.’ He filled in for me. I nodded, looking back up. His tender eyes had gotten a whole lot more stormy now, his nostrils flaring.

He lowered his eyes, licking his lips again. Was he nervous?

‘Well just to confirm. I do want kids, another dog AND a house with a nice garden.’ I nodded, feeling my already hot cheeks burn as his hot gaze quickly peeked back at me. I folded one of my hands around my cheek, feeling the skin burn. ‘I’m not even sure anymore if I’m blushing or blazing.’ I snickered. He smiled, letting out a small breath as he leaned towards the sidetable to grab the cool washcloth and dab it on my heated face again.

‘Good. And marriage..still okay?’ He peered into my eyes as his hand gently pressed the cloth against my cheeks. ‘Of course. I could do with a different last name.’ I shrugged, feigning disinterest. He chuckled, his hand turning my head so I could see him raising a handsome eyebrow in challenge. ‘What?’ I chuckled, leaning into the coolness of the cloth, the moisture forming drips on my salty skin. Two can play that game, I thought, giving him my most seductive gaze. Henry swallowed harshly as his hand froze for a moment against my cheek, our eyes just looking deeply into one another.

In the back of my mind I half-registered the tv had started a count down. But his eyes. Those eyes. I couldn’t look away.

The sound got a touch louder as we heard the neighbours following along top lung, their count down sounding through the living room wall.

‘9..8…7..’

Henry sat up a bit, moving away the wash cloth.

‘6…5…4..’

Our eyes blazed as our lips were curled in stupid smiles. Blue meets green. Boy meets girl. Husband meets wife?

‘3..2...’

I let out a small gasp as Henry bent over.

‘I want it all with you Henry. I do.’ I whispered against his lips, our kiss forming a perfect seal of promises made.

‘HAPPY NEW YEAR!! WOOHOO YEAAAAAA!!!’ The neighbours went berserkers as a loud pop sounded of a champagne bottle.

Meanwhile our living room was a whole lot more quiet. Much to our amusement. We let out a soft chuckle as Henry’s hand sneaked around my head, pulling me as close as he dared.

‘Happy new year love.’ He smiled, his cheeks showing those cute dimples as he pressed the wash cloth back against my heated skin, our noses touching.

‘Hmm..’ I hummed, leaning into the cool cloth and closing my eyes. ‘Happy new year.’

‘And..’ He sat back a bit. ‘I have a first proposal to make.’

My stomach did a little summersault as I gave him a confused look. ‘Now..?’ I asked, unsurely. He chuckled. ‘Now’s as good a time as any.’ He sat back a bit more and pulled my hands into his, giving me an intent look. ‘Dear Lisa. Would you, please, go on a holiday with me?’

I burst out laughing.

‘Oh by Merlin’s beard! Henry, you! Hahaha.’ I rolled my eyes, before nodding “yes”.

Part 16 >

#henry cavill fanfic #henry cavill fanfiction #henry cavill x oc #fanfiction #NYE #insicknessandinhealth #teafortwo #cute #fluff #fluffy

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pangzi · 4 years

Text

Otome Gay [Nielan] - Chapter 5

word count: 1869 other chapters: INTRO - Chapter 1 - Chapter 2 - Chapter 3 - Chapter 4 - Chapter 5 - Chapter 6 - Chapter 7 - Chapter 8 - Chapter 9 [AO3]

Since then, things with Xichen were a bit strange. It felt like both everything and nothing had changed. They still talked as much, but sometimes when things got a bit too flirty or serious, Xichen seemed to suddenly get a lot quieter. Mingjue didn’t really know how to handle this. He didn’t want to think too much of it, maybe Xichen just wanted to take things a bit slower than Mingjue, and that was totally okay. But there was always this little nagging voice in his head that told him he did something wrong and now Xichen wasn’t interested anymore. Always followed by the other nagging voice that said that of course Xichen isn’t interested, why would he be, that Xichen is too good for him and he should be happy he even wants to be his friend.

Mingjue wanted to just take his brain out and throw it in the trash whenever those thoughts took over. It was so ridiculous, Xichen had agreed to go on a date with him, he wouldn’t do that if he wasn’t interested. He wouldn’t lead Mingjue on, he was sure of it. Xichen even kept saying how much he was looking forward to their date on Friday, as long as he still was, Mingjue shouldn’t worry. Although it wasn’t the best first date, it still beat a movie date. They could just find a quiet place to talk after greeting their brothers and some of their friends and spend the entire night talking. Mingjue would find a way to make it romantic.

Mingjue had planned to take Huaisang to Haidilao Hot Pot on Thursday as an early birthday celebration, as it had become somewhat a tradition in the past few years. There was even a new restaurant opening near Huaisang’s university, so it was perfect. Or, it would have been, had one of Huaisang’s mandatory classes not been rescheduled for the exact time Mingjue had made a reservation.

It was foolish to give up a reservation in such a popular restaurant so Mingjue decided to still go, he’d take Huaisang again another time. Xichen was going somewhere with Wangji tonight, so he couldn’t ask him to come along. So instead he decided to take Zonghui.

When they arrived, the line of people without a reservation was incredibly long. Mingjue almost felt bad that they could just go inside without waiting. Right when they walked in, he saw a familiar face in line. Meng Yao.

For a moment he wanted to just walk inside, remembering the way Meng Yao had looked at him last time they met. He didn’t trust him one bit, but he was Xichen’s best friend, he should probably try and be at least on good terms with him. So he told Zonghui to wait a moment.

“Meng Yao”, Mingjue called to catch the boy’s attention, who turned to him immediately. “You can come in with us, we have a reservation”, Mingjue said, forcing a kind smile on his face. Meng Yao seemed surprised at that.

“Mingjue-xiong, that is very kind of you but-”

“We’ve been waiting for hours, we’d love to join you!” Meng Yao’s friend interrupted him, before introducing himself as Su She.

As they went in, Mingjue heard Meng Yao hiss something at Su She, who apologized profusely, stating he was just too hungry to wait any longer. Mingjue ignored it though, he did a good deed.

The first part of the meal was quite awkward, Mingjue had no idea why exactly but Zonghui and Meng Yao did not get along. They kept snapping at each other and rolling their eyes when the other said something. Su She mostly sat there in silence, only nodding along to whatever Meng Yao said like some kind of robot while Mingjue just tried to keep the peace.

As soon as the waiter brought their hot pot, and they could actually start eating the conversation died down a bit. Whenever something was said it was either between Meng Yao and Su She or Zonghui and Mingjue. This wasn’t going too well… He almost regretted inviting them in. He definitely regretted it when Zonghui got a phone call halfway through dinner from his mother and urgently had to leave, leaving Mingjue alone with some people he didn’t really know.

“Why did you come here with Zonghui tonight?” Meng Yao suddenly asked, only moments after Zonghui left.

“Huaisang’s class got rescheduled, and alone wouldn’t have been fun”

Meng Yao hummed. “Then why didn’t you ask Xichen?”

“Because he’s out with his brother” Mingjue said. Meng Yao raised an eyebrow at him, as if to say ‘what about it?’ Sometimes Mingjue forgot not everyone is as close to their siblings as he is, but he didn’t feel like explaining it any more so he didn’t. After a while though, Meng Yao just shrugged and continued eating. It was quiet for a while after that, nobody seemed to know what to say.

“I don’t mean to be rude”, Meng Yao said, “but I always wonder… What do you and Xichen talk about? You two talk so often and have so little in common, I cannot help but be curious.” His tone sounded so condescending, Mingjue’s grip on his chopsticks tightened. He didn’t even know him? How was he going to decide whether or not Mingjue and Xichen had anything in common or had anything to talk about.

Before answering, Mingjue decided to eat another piece of lotus root, giving himself time to calm down a bit and formulate an answer. “Many things, actually. Usually we start off telling each other about our day”, Mingjue began.

“Very domestic”, Su She laughed, after which he winced in pain so softly Mingjue almost didn’t notice.

He ignored it though and continued. “We often talk about our brothers too, and our jobs, we’re mostly just getting to know each other.”

Meng Yao nodded along as he spoke. “Ah”, he commented, “So nothing too… intellectual, excuse my choice of words” The arrogant smile he gave Mingjue before he called for a waiter and asked for the bill only made it worse

“What do you mean by that?” Mingjue hissed.

“Oh, I just mean that it’s so different from what Xichen and I speak about usually”, Meng Yao grinned. “Not that I’m surprised” Su She nodded in agreement with a laugh. Mingjue was trying so hard to stay calm and not give this brat a piece of his mind. He had no right calling him stupid, he didn’t even know him? The waiter came back with the bill. “Enjoy it while it lasts.” Meng Yao told Mingjue as he paid. “Dinner is on me, see you tomorrow.”

Mingjue was still fuming when he got home. He angrily paced through the house for a while, went on a run and even then he was still aggravated. He had asked Zonghui to call him when he could so he could vent, but he hadn’t gotten a reply yet. He thought about calling Huaisang for a moment, but he didn’t want to bother him with his problems right now. He decided to play the game some more, at least there he could give Meng Yao a piece of his mind and nobody would know.

As he started his computer, his phone buzzed. Someone was calling him. Assuming it was Zonghui, he answered without even looking who it was. He was about to start complaining immediately, luckily he didn’t, as it clearly wasn’t Zonghui at the other side of the line judging from the warm greeting he heard as soon as he answered.

“Hey”, he whispered, his temper disappearing almost immediately, “how was your evening?”

“Wonderful, thank you for asking”, Xichen chimed, “How was yours? A-Yao said he saw you and Zonghui at the new Haidilao near campus” He sounded a bit strained mentioning Zonghui, did he know Zonghui and Meng Yao didn’t get along?

“I was supposed to go with Huaisang, but school ruined our plans”, Mingjue explained, “Letting our reservation go would have been a waste”

Xichen agreed with him. “Thank you for getting A-Yao in too, apparently Su She forgot to make an appointment, he’s so forgetful sometimes”, Xichen giggled, had he not, Mingjue probably would’ve gotten mad again at just having to hear about those two again.

“I couldn’t leave your best friend out in the cold, could I?” Mingjue muttered, opening the game with some harsh clicks.

“A-Yao said he and Su She had a great evening, thank you Mingjue.”

Mingjue really wanted to punch something. Of course Meng Yao had had a great evening, taunting Mingjue like that. For a moment he wanted to tell Xichen what Meng Yao had told him, how he’d made fun of him. He knew Xichen had no reason to believe him over his friend of several years. All he could do is prove Meng Yao wrong.

The rest of the conversation with Xichen was casual and light, like all of their conversations. Xichen complained a bit about how shopping with Wangji was absolutely impossible sometimes. After that they just exchanged funny stories about their brothers. He liked how he could just be himself around Xichen, fool around and make jokes. Tell embarrassing stories without being judged. Still, Meng Yao’s words kept ringing in his head. All fun and light but nothing intellectual.

God, he didn’t even know what Meng Yao meant by that. Did he want them to talk astrophysics or what? Did he expect them to discuss art styles and medieval paintings every conversation?

He heard Xichen yawn. It was long past his bedtime already and Mingjue always felt bad for keeping him up late. Especially when he knew Xichen had to teach early tomorrow morning. “You should go to bed”, Mingjue said.

“I am in bed”, Xichen murmured before changing the call to video. The view Mingjue got was one he never wanted to forget. Xichen was bundled up in his sheets, arms wrapped tightly around the plush tiger Mingjue had given him. Cheek squished against the pillow and his hair messy in the cutest way. Mingjue’s heart was surely going to give out. “Turn on your video”, Xichen requested quietly,

“Promise to go to sleep after I do?” Mingjue asked. Xichen hummed softly, moving around a bit to turn off his nightlight already.

As he turned on his own video, Xichen smiled widely. “You look handsome”, he whispered, barely loud enough for his phone to pick up on it.

“You’re the most beautiful man I’ve ever seen, Xichen”, Mingjue confessed, which caused Xichen to hide his face in his pillow with an embarrassed groan. “I can’t wait to see you again tomorrow”

Xichen turned back to the camera, hiding most of his face behind the plushie still. A lock of hair fell into his eyes and Mingjue’s fingers itched to tuck it behind his ears. “If you want to see me tomorrow then you’ll have to stop saying such sappy things”, Xichen complained.

“Then go to sleep, I’ll keep my sappy words for tomorrow”, Mingjue laughed.

Xichen nodded from behind the plushie. “All right, good night, Mingjue. I can’t wait to see you again tomorrow.”

“Me neither. Sweet dreams, Xichen.”

#otome gay #nielan #nie mingjue #lan xichen #mirf writes #the untamed #cql #mo dao zu shi

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ghstandpucks · 4 years

Text

Misguided Ghost Ch.5

A.N.: Thanks for the support everyone! Let me know if you are enjoying the story :)

Doin’ Time

The whole table was laughing at a story Billy was telling. We had been at the bar for about 4 hours now, just sharing stories and hanging out. It was nice to feel like I had made some friends. I was nursing my third beer, trying not to show how much I was actually feeling it. “So Y/N, how are you feeling about being apart of the crew?” Billy asked.

“Good!” I said a little too quickly, causing the table to snicker. Zak reached over and grabbed my beer. I looked at him shocked and took it back. “Excuse you, I am fine!” Zak chuckled as I turned back to Billy and the group. “I mean, I’ve only been around for like two days, but beside this one,” I motioned to Zak with my thumb, “the guys have been nice and welcoming and I’m loving looking at all the history of the places you guys are considering investigating,” I finished with a smile. They were all either nodding or laughing at what I said, even Zak.

“We are happy to have you Y/N. And with that being said, I think it’s time to head home,” Nick said while Veronique grabbed her purse. Everyone decided it was time to head out and home, considering it was almost midnight. I walked with Aaron and Zak toward the front.

“You didn’t drive, did you Y/N?” Aaron asked. I shook my head no.

“I can take you home. I’m already driving Aaron,” Zak offered.

“It’s ok. I can call an uber. I don’t want to make you go out of your way,” I replied, taking my phone out of my purse and opening the uber app.

“No, seriously it’s fine. I don’t mind,” Zak insisted. I looked up at him and he gave me a soft smile. I nodded my head and smiled back, thanking him.

“Let’s go little one,” Aaron wrapped his arm around my shoulder as we followed Zak to his Jeep. I giggled and wrapped my arm around his waist. I insisted that I sat in the back since I was smaller, although Aaron offered the front to me. Once we were in and settled, I gave Zak my address and he started to drive. As we were driving, Lana Del Rey’s remake of Doin’ Time came on the radio, and being that I was in a tipsy state of mind, I decided to sing out loud. Now I am in no way a singer, but I didn’t think I sounded that bad, until Zak turned the radio station.

“Hey, turn it back!” I yelled from the back seat as Aaron was getting his phone out and laughing. Zak chuckled and turned the station back on. I realized at this point Aaron was recording and sang louder, looking directly at his phone. “Evil, I've come to tell you that she's evil, most definitely. Evil, ornery, scandalous and evil, most definitely.” I was dancing in my seat. Aaron turned his phone back to himself.

“I’m pretty sure she is the farthest thing from evil,” he chuckled, making Zak laugh too. I was having too much fun with the song that once it was over, I saw a notification from Instagram on my phone. Aaron had tagged me in his story.

“Wait Aaron you didn’t!” I screeched, opening it and watching myself sing off key and wiggle around in the seat.

“Oh I did!” He replied proudly. Zak laughed and I made a mental note to actually watch how much I drank next time. I wasn’t drunk, but definitely had the liquid courage to make an idiot out of myself. I hid my face in my hands, laughing and muttering ‘oh my God, what have I done!’

“Don’t worry Y/N, it was cute,” Zak winked through the mirror at me. I saw Aaron raise an eyebrow at him, and then turn back to me.

“We’ll do an Aaron’s vlog soon and I’ll introduce you as a team member,” he said, as I noticed we turned into my complex.

“Ok, sounds good,” I was still blushing at Zak’s comment. We pulled up to my apartment and I hopped out of the car. “Thank you Zak, I appreciate the ride! Have a good night you guys!” I shut the door as they said good night as well, Zak waiting for me to actually get into my place before taking off. I thought it was sweet that he wanted to make sure I was safe. I jumped in the shower and drank a glass of water, feeling the buzz slowly leave me. I crawled under my covers in bed and fell asleep, looking forward to seeing the guys on Monday and hoping that Zak meant what he said about calling it truce.

~ ~ ~

Monday morning came quicker than expected. I spent the rest of my weekend putting the final touches on my apartment and going grocery shopping. I even went to a yoga class on Sunday, signing up for a membership at the studio. Aaron had sent me a text with screen shots of messages from the insta-story post. A lot of speculation on who I was and if I was dating either of them. That made me laugh.

Today was a little chilly in Vegas, so I opted for wearing a purple dress with grey tights and a cream cardigan. Threw on my brown boots and took off to work. I went to my office and started up my laptop when Aaron burst in. “Aaron’s vlog! To answer all your questions about who that girl was in my insta-story on Friday, it was our new GAC historian, Y/N!” he said then turned his phone toward me. I sat there shocked for a second, then giggled and waved. ‘Say something’ Aaron mouthed.

“Sorry for my terrible singing guys! Hopefully my research makes up for it!” I gave a thumbs up and Aaron stopped recording.

“Your singing wasn’t terrible,” he stated. I rolled my eyes.

“You don’t have to be nice,” I smiled at him.

“Well someone enjoyed it,” he wiggled his eyebrows. I immediately looked at Zak’s office. Thankfully he was on the phone and not paying attention. Looking back at Aaron I blushed at his grin.

“Go away,” I shooed him out of my office as he let out a chuckle. The rest of the day was pretty uneventful for the most part. I was working on a site with a particularly gruesome past when Zak walked into my office, face in his phone. He sat down in the chair in front of my desk as I stared at him expectantly. “Can I help you?” I asked.

“No,” he muttered, still texting. I decided to ignore him and go back to my work. A few seconds later he spoke up. “This office feels calmer than it did before you got here.” I looked up at him to find him staring at me, brows scrunched up.

“Spearmint and eucalyptus air freshener,” I pointed toward the wall outlet where my diffuser was. I love Aromatherapy from Bath and Body Works. Zak nodded and started looking around my space from his chair. “Is everything alight?” I asked him after about five more minutes of us sitting in silence. Zak smiled softly at me.

“Sorry, am I bothering you?”

“No. I just don’t know why you’re in here,” I smiled back.

“I was coming to tell you about our travel arrangements for our investigation this week. I was just getting the last details when I came in,” he said. I nodded, urging him to continue. “Your office just has a calming vibe. Sorry I spaced out.”

“It’s fine. So what’s up with the travel plans?” I asked. Zak let me know that we would be driving to Utah, where we were going was only about 4 hours away. They would pick me up from my house at 9am on Wednesday, Thursday we would have our walk through and conduct interviews, and then the lockdown was set for Friday. We would come back Sunday seeing as they would probably be drained to drive back Saturday.

“Sounds great! I’m excited!” I clapped my hands together, making Zak grin at me.

“Hopefully you’re still saying that when you’re being locked in with us.” I rolled my eyes.

“As I said during my interview, I won’t promise that I won’t scream if something happens, but I should be just fine,” I laughed his comment off. To be honest, I was a bit nervous. Excited because I loved to travel, but nervous about the hauntings.

Zak stayed in my office for a while, working off of his phone. I would tell him something about what I was looking up every so often and he always looked intrigued. By the end of the day he had his laptop sitting on my desk, sending emails. He claimed the smell of my room was keeping him. I told him he could take it to his office if he liked it that much, but he shook his head and made himself comfortable on the other side of my desk. I looked over my laptop at him before I closed it, and noticed his shoulders seemed more relaxed and he didn’t seem as tense. He had also been nice to me all day. I know we made a truce, but I wasn’t really expecting this much progress all at one time. I made a quick order of another air diffuser to put in his office, and packed up my stuff. I walked out with the guys as we left to go home for the evening, noticing that Zak stayed right by me. I shrugged it off, maybe he was just getting used to me. When I said goodbye to Aaron though, he raised his eyebrow, then sent me a wink. I shook my head and shrugged. Maybe Zak and I could be the best of friends after all. I mean, he was just being nice. Right?

#Ghost Adventures #ghost adventures imagine #zak bagans #zak bagans imagine #gac #ghost adventures x reader #zak bagans x reader

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yourdeepestfathoms · 4 years

Text

The Crucible (part six)

[UK Tour; Carrie AU]

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5

Word count: 10,030

TW: Animal death, blood, the r-slur

--------------

-Something’s In The Air-

“I’m impressed, Thomas. I am impressed.”

Brown, oily bangs gently hung over a craggy, charming face. Round green eyes, set lightly within their sockets, watch the detective closely. A knife left a mark reaching from the top of the right cheek, running towards his upper lip and ending on his forehead, leaving a permanent memory of mischief on nineteen year old Thomas Culpeper’s face.

“Four counts of possession, one with the intent to sell. Vandalism, disturbing the peace, drunk and disorderly.” Mulaney read off from the folder with information on the newest victim of interrogation. “Boy, your parents must be awfully proud of you.”

“My parents died when I was six.” Thomas spat.

Mulaney stared at him in horror. Thomas huffed out a breath and leaned back in his chair, glaring sharply.

“Not so funny now, is it?”

“Well, it sure is funny odd,” Mulaney said, “because I just talked to Constance and Alexander not an hour ago, both very much alive and very concerned.”

Thomas growled softly and looked away.

“Thomas, do you ever pal around with a girl named Anne Boleyn?” Mulaney asked.

“She’s a distant cousin,” Thomas answered gruffly. “We sometimes hung out.”

“What about Catherine Parr?”

Thomas shook his head.

“Katherine Howard?”

Nothing.

Mulaney walked around the table and over to his side, opening the folder in his hands again. “Hey, have you ever been to Irwin Henty’s pig farm up north?”

“No.” Thomas muttered.

“You’ve never been up there?” Mulaney humored him. “Well, see, Henry had no security system, so people were knocking fences down and stealing hogs and all kinds of things!” He laughed. Thomas was sweating.

“Is that so?”

“Yeah,” Mulaney said. “So what do you think he does?” He doesn’t wait for an answer- not that Thomas’s pallor makes him look up to even giving one. “He installs one of those expensive, high-tech security systems. Oh, man, he’s even got one of those really cool cameras that take pictures in the dark! Doggone it, they look like they were taken in broad daylight!”

He slipped out some green photos taken with a night vision camera and slid them over to Thomas.

“Look at this. Look at the detail on that!” Mulaney went on, pointing to the clear image of Thomas, Cathy, Anne, Maggie, Maggie’s boyfriend, and another kid named Thomas Cromwell sneaking into Old Man Henty’s pigpen. “You can just about count the hairs on that pig’s snout, can’t you?” He showed a photo of a closeup of Thomas's face. “I thought this one was particularly good of you.”

Thomas looked away, biting his lip.

“Of course, here’s another one of all six of you. Looking pretty chummy!” Mulaney said with a slight laugh. “Say, how come there’s no pictures of Katherine? Was she waiting in the truck?”

“How should I know?” Thomas asked softly. “She wasn’t even there…”

Mulaney furrowed his eyebrows, exchanging a quick glance with Madeline. He sat back down across from Thomas.

“Well, it was to my understanding that Katherine and Anne planned the whole thing.”

Thomas scoffed lightly. “Dude,” He said, “you don’t know what you’re talking about.”

------

The gym early Thursday morning was flurry of activity as kids moved to and fro to get ready for the prom in two days. Paints splattered, ribbons unraveled, fairy lights flickered, and everyone acted as if it were the end of the world if even the slightest decoration was off. Watching it was entertaining, but now that she was actually a part of the decoration committee, Katherine could see why it was so stressful.

Since she wouldn’t be going to prom, Katherine had decided the least she could do was help set up for it. Their theme that year was Springtime in Greece (whose idea was it to have themes for prom, Katherine wondered), so huge murals of Greek temples were drawn by the art kids on giant canvases and were currently being painted by several other volunteers. The stage, where the band would play and prom king and queen would be announced, was being set up in a way that made it look like the ancient Parthenon, fit with grooved columns, dressings of leaves and flowers, and swathes of white and gold silk. Sculptures were being carved away by extremely focused students, whittling the plaster or rock or ice away into the distinct shape of hands and heads and legs. Katherine walked over to one of them, Maria, who was sweating buckets trying to get what seemed to be a wave to look just right.

“I can’t believe--they’re only giving us--two days,” She grunted, not looking over at Katherine, but hearing her coming over.

“Can you finish it?” Katherine asked. She circled around one of the decorative pillars sitting around and began to smooth down the grooves.

“Yeah,” Maria nodded. “But it’s still STRESSFUL.”

“What even is it?”

Maria frowned at her, then looked back at her sculpture. “It’s a tidal wave of human hopes and dreams. I will be filling it with pieces of writing once it’s done.”

“And what does that have to do with Greece?”

Maria ruffled. “It could fit!” She barked. “Why are you slaving yourself in here, anyway? You’re not even--...” She trailed off, clearly still upset about the news.

“Going?” Katherine finished for her. She shrugged. “I still want it to look nice. And it looks like you guys can use all the help you can get.” She nodded at a puny red haired Year 10 kid wrestling with coils of ivy and vines on the stage and losing the battle. Bessie, head of the Decoration Committee, watched on with a dismayed expression.

“Can I ask about it?” Maria asked softly.

“Sure,” Katherine said, then laughed slightly. “You don’t have to whisper, Mars. It’s not some big secret.”

“Well, thank god,” Maria said. “Because EVERYONE is talking!”

Katherine quirked an eyebrow with a light snort. “Oh, really? What are they saying?”

“That you and Joan Seymour are having a lesbian affair, and you’re having Anna take her to prom to throw people off,” Maria said languidly. Katherine leaned over to a nearby canister of paint and flicked the paintbrush at her face for that. She sputtered, scrubbing viciously and leaving light purple streaks all over her dark skin. “Okay, okay-- I deserved that.”

“Well, you’re right…” Katherine sighed. “It’s just that--Joan satisfies me in a way no other woman or man possibly could.” She finished her sentence with a lewd touch to her breasts; a Year 11 girl that was helping paint the mural looked over at that moment and furrowed her eyebrows in confusion. Katherine dropped her hands quickly, and Maria burst into laughter.

“Oh, I bet!” Maria said. “Does she use her crosses as a dildo? Because I bet Jesus’s face feels GREAT against your clit!”

Katherine flicked more paint, this time orange, into Maria’s face. Once again, Maria spluttered and clawed at the colorful tears rolling down her skin. Katherine peered at her thoughtfully.

“Orange really is your color,” She observed.

“Just like how Christian semen white is yours.” Maria replied.

Katherine rolled her eyes and nudged Maria’s side with her foot, earning her a cheeky, paint-splattered grin.

“I just feel bad about what happened,” She said. “I’m hoping it’ll bring her out of her shell a little, you know? Knock down some of those walls she has up. It’s the least I could do after what happened in the showers.”

“Great! So you’re a saint and we’re all bitches!” Maria said.

“Pretty much!”

They both laughed.

“I can’t believe Anna’s going along with it,” Maria went on. “She really wanted to bring you.”

“Well, she’s been very agreeable since we started having sex.” Katherine stated bluntly.

“Ooh!” Maria cooed. “You go girl!”

Katherine was about to reply when a momentary hush fell over the gym. She turned to see her cousin walking in, back to school after her three day suspension, her head held high. She glared sharply at a Year 10 boy dripping yellow paint all over his hands, and he nearly keeled over dead instantly. Katherine looked away quickly, not wanting to face Anna after their falling out at the pub. Her words began to echo in her ears again.

“That’s why you had this bullshit change of heart. You don’t give a shit about Joan Seymour, and everybody knows it…”

She stamped them down and silenced them.

“Has Anne said anything?” Katherine asked Maria.

Maria thought for a moment. “Only that she hates your guts.”

“Ah,” Katherine said, not surprised. “Think she might try something?”

Maria tilted her head at her. “I don’t know.”

A whirlwind of thick brown hair and green polo shirt whizzed by- Maggie scuttled over to Anne, eyes wide, clutching a dark brown folder in her arms. Katherine turned her attention to the pillar she was sanding down, so she didn’t see the way her cousin was pulled to the side and out of sight behind the mural.

“Got your 999,” Anne said, holding up her phone. “Ever so dramatic.”

“Let me reiterate-” Maggie said. “Oh my god!”

“What?” Anne asked, amused. She could see the mischievous light in Maggie’s eyes, and that filled her with a deadly thrill.

Maggie pulled a small slip of paper out of the folder and waved it in the air.

“This,” She declared, “is the ballot for prom king and queen!”

“What?” Anne’s eyes widened in interest. “Let me see!”

Maggie handed Anne the piece of paper and they began to read from it, nitpicking all the choices.

“Jackson and Georgie,” Anne said. “No way, Jackson’s in marching band.”

“Ruby and Leila,” Maggie read next. Their school was very open to LGBTQ+ relationships, so it wasn’t a surprise that a lesbian couple was a choice for prom king and queen.

“Maybe. Everybody likes them.” Anne said. “Miller and Jessie, no. Ren and Alex, maybe. Anna and--”

Her eyes go wide.

Right beside Anna von Cleves’s name was her cousin's name--but scratched out and replaced with “Joan” over the top. Greedy intensity began to bubble up inside of her. She giggled darkly.

“Anna and Joan!” She exclaimed.

“I know!” Maggie agreed enthusiastically. “What are you gonna do?”

A twisted grin curled on Anne’s ruby red lips like a bloody smile.

“Give everyone a night they’ll never forget.”

------

First period with Anne back was...awkward, to say the least. Maggie talked to Anne as she always did, being the loyal little imp that she was, but everyone else was slightly unnerved by the smirk that never disappeared from Anne’s lips for even a second.

About halfway through the class, when Anna got up to go sharpen her pencil, Joan leapt up from her seat to go talk to her. Katherine pricked her ears to hear their conversation.

“Hey, Joan,” Anna said, smiling at the younger girl. “How are you?”

“Good,” Joan answered quietly. She was fidgeting with her sleeves, pulling them over her hands and bunching them into balls, clearly anxious about something. “Umm-- I-I just-- I had to t-tell you that I need to be home by eleven.”

Katherine saw Anna frown slightly. Joan lowered her head, guilt practically radiating off of her body.

“I’m sorry,” She whispered. “B-but my Mama-- She’ll worry if I stay out too long and-- I’m really sorry. I don’t want to spoil your fun, but--”

“Hey, no, it’s okay,” Anna calmed her, noticing that she was getting worked up. “I understand completely.”

Joan nodded slightly. “O-okay…”

“Did something happen?” Anna asked. She gently lifted Joan’s chin and ducked her head slightly to look at something. That’s when Katherine noticed indigo and violet splotches of bruises under Joan’s lower jaw.

“Oh--” Joan looked a little uncomfortable, but didn't pull away from Anna’s hand. “Yeah. I just--fell. On a chair. Yesterday. And I hit my mouth.”

Anna pursed her lips. “Looks like it hurts.”

Joan shrugged. “I’m used to it.” She took a small step back. “Umm-- I’m gonna--go sit back down. Oh, and th-thank you. For not getting mad.”

“I wouldn’t be mad at you, Joan.” Anna said honestly.

Joan ducked her head with an adorably shy blush. She nodded and shuffled back over to her seat.

Katherine didn’t miss the way Anna smiled fondly at her.

------

“Um, 15. High school. I’m in Year 11.”

Joan held the phone close to her ear, listening intently to what the operator was telling her. She kept shifting from foot to foot, trying to keep her nervousness quelled inside of her.

“What kind of counselling? Like a guidance counselor?”

Miss Aragon’s office smelled like apples and cherry blossoms. It was a comforting scent, so different from the locker room just outside the door. And outside that door, was someone coming in. Someone who wasn’t the coach.

“Oh. No. Nothing like that. Would they know what’s happening with me?”

Footsteps, the rustling of clothes, soft clangs against lockers- Joan heard none of it.

“Um, so, if I just think it’s real and it’s not, how would I know? I mean, it feels real.”

“We’re not supposed to use that phone.”

Joan just about jumped out of her skin when she heard the voice. She slammed the phone back down onto the receiver, missing it the first time, nearly flipping it off of the desk the second, and then finally smashing it into place so hard it’s a wonder the entire thing didn’t crumble to dust the third. She whirled around to face Anne Boleyn standing in the doorway, looking like a disdainful emerald with her sparkling green dress and darkly amused expression. Joan swallowed thickly and shuffled back slightly, pressing her spine against the sharp edge of Miss Aragon’s table.

“I-I was talking to my mum.” She stammered.

“Didn’t sound like you were talking to your mum.” Anne said.

“We were having a fight…” Joan said awkwardly. It was the best excuse she could come up with under pressure; telling this girl that she was actually calling a university over the psychic powers she had would probably sound a little strange.

Slowly, she bent down and picked up her belongings off of the floor. As much as she wanted to stay longer and talk more with Miss Aragon when she got back from her current class, Anne was making her extremely uneasy and on edge. She didn’t feel very safe being alone with her.

“I always fight with my mum,” Anne mused. “Always hang up on her, too.” She laughed. “So, I take it you’ve leveled out since last Friday?”

Joan stared at her.

(what does she want what does she want)

“Your little episode.”

(no no go away leave me alone)

“You went all fetal in the shower.”

In spite of herself, Joan felt a blush crawl to her cheeks. She looked away, shifting her weight onto a different knee. She wanted to hide behind her books and hope Anne would be gone when she looked back up again.

“What about it?” She asked softly.

“Well, you have to admit you totally overreacted,” Anne said. She stepped into the room fully. The door clicked shut behind her.

(trapped trapped trapped trapped)

“You know, we were just messing around!”

(what)

“We wouldn’t give you a hard time if we didn’t like you.”

Joan raised her head slightly and blinked at Anne in confusion and shock. Was that really how friendships worked?

“I mean, we all really like you.” Anne said. “You know that, right?”

(friend)

Joan looked her up and down, and could easily locate at least three faults in this statement, but she was so hungry for friends and affection that the hopeful, naive part of her sort of believed it. Still, she kept her walls raised up and tried not to let that vulnerability show on her face.

“What do you want?” She asked warily.

“Don’t get all pissy,” Anne said, and she playfully shoved Joan, although it didn’t feel as playful as it should have been. Miss Aragon’s desk scraped against the floor slightly, its edge cutting uncomfortably into Joan’s spine. “I’m only trying to be nice!”

(nice)

(not nice don’t trust)

(nice)

“So,” Anne examined Joan closely, and Joan wanted to squirm underneath her gaze. “Are your boobs sore?”

Joan blinked at her in bewilderment. She looked down at her breasts for just a moment, then looked back up quickly, opening and closing her mouth like a flabbergasted fish out of water. All she could get out was a dumbstruck, “What?”

“You look a little bloated,” Anne continued, ignoring her question. She tilted her head, seemingly to get a better angle at Joan’s stomach, and Joan felt like there were eels squirming underneath her skin. “When I’m bloated, my boobs get really sore.”

Joan couldn’t help but glance at Anne’s own breasts when that was said.

“You’re only supposed to take, like, two Ibuprofen,” Anne went on. “I take three.” She chuckled. “I got that from Kat! She’s, like, a total junkie. Now that you guys are all cozy, she’ll have you tossing them back like communion wafers.”

“I’m not...cozy with Katherine Howard…” Joan said.

Anne looked oddly surprised, and Joan wondered for a moment if she accidentally ruined a friendship she didn’t even know she had.

“Really?” Anne said. “She’s acting like you’re her new best friend!”

(friend)

“Don’t get me wrong, I think it’s great. Just...don’t let her turn you into another one of her ‘projects.’”

That made Joan perk up. She blinked rapidly at Anne.

“Did she say I was a project?”

“It’s her MO.” Anne said. She looked at Joan pitifully. “Maria was a project, Bessie was a project...I was even a project! She practically talked me into getting Botox last summer. Can you believe that?” She laughed.

“Maybe she thought you needed it…”

Something twitched on Anne’s face, like her expression was actually just a mask of plaster that was starting to crumble. She resettled her features quickly.

“I’m just saying that she has a hard time accepting people for who they are.” Anne said. “Being her friend can be a little on the demeaning side, especially when everyone in school knows why she’s being your friend.”

Joan flinched at her words and looked down at her feet. Anne made a sympathetic clucking noise.

“Well, I gotta dip,” Anne said, heading for the door. “Oh, and you can tell Katherine she can say all she wants about me, but at least when I’m being a bitch I’ll cop to it.”

Joan said nothing.

Anne smiled. “Bye!”

And then she was gone. Joan could finally breathe, and she instantly sunk to the floor, trying to tame all the whirling thoughts filling up her brain.

(go)

(don’t go)

(go)

(don’t go)

(trick trick it’s a trick Mama was right)

A door out in the locker room opened and closed. Miss Aragon appeared in the doorway, a sheen of sweat glistening on her forehead and dozens of water droplets shimmering like silver spider eyes in her hair. Despite the chilly weather outside, she was wearing black shorts and a lemon yellow workout shirt, looking like an angelic wasp in the office.

“Joan,” She said, noticing the girl on the floor. Students from her current class were starting to file in to get changed, so she stepped inside fully and shut the door. “You really did skip all of third, didn’t you? Naughty girl.”

Joan ducked her head, feeling embarrassed. After what her mother did to her last night, she had been desperate to see Miss Aragon, one of the only people she felt safe around. Something about the coach’s presence was so comforting to her, like she would never be harmed as long as she stayed by her side. So, she went to her, missing the entirety of her third period Geometry class to hide out in the office after explaining that she was feeling very anxious, which wasn’t exactly a lie.

“Sorry…” She mumbled.

“It’s alright, sweetheart,” Miss Aragon chuckled. She tilted her head at Joan. “What are you doing on the floor?”

“Just...thinking…” Joan replied.

“About?” Miss Aragon asked, sitting down next to her. Her eyes were so caring and loving; Joan wished she could be looked at like that forever.

“I got invited to prom.” Joan said, and something about Miss Aragon’s expression told her the coach already knew. She pulled her knees to her chest and hugged them tightly. “But I don’t know if I should go…”

Miss Aragon appeared to be a little startled by that. She shifted around and ducked her head so she could look at Joan’s face, and Joan could see all that love and care glow in her eyes once again.

“What do you mean?” She prodded. “Why not?”

“I’m not gonna fit in…” Joan said. “I still can’t wrap my head around why Anna von Cleves asked ME. Katherine Howard is so pretty and muscley and smart and tall and confident and pretty…” She trailed off. “Why would she want to go with me?”

“Because you’re amazing, Joan.” Miss Aragon said, not missing a beat. “Anyone who doesn’t have their head in their--umm--butt can see that.”

Joan giggled softly at her coach’s avoidance of swearing in front of her, but it quickly died off when all her self esteem issues came shoving their way back in. She huddled her knees even closer to her chest and looked down at the floor.

“But...I’m not as pretty as all the other girls…” She mumbled.

“Nonsense!” Miss Aragon reprimanded. “Joan, you are a very pretty girl.” She cupped Joan’s face and lifted her head up. “Just look at those eyes! And those lips! Why, with the right shade of lipstick--”

“Lipstick?” Joan sputtered. “My mother would never--”

“Joan, it could be wonderful!” Miss Aragon went on. “They don’t have the glow you have. The-- the charm! Those other girls may as well just wear garbage bags with the word ‘whore’ spray painted on it. And you wanna know why?”

“Why?”

“Because they’re whores.”

Joan burst out into giggles and had to cover her mouth to try and muffle them. Miss Aragon grinned triumphantly.

“It’s because none of them will be able to do what you can do,” Miss Aragon said. “You have been hurt for so many years, and yet you’re still getting up and going to the prom, despite it all. If one of those girls out there were in your shoes, they would have given up a long time ago. They wouldn’t have said yes and, instead, cried in their bathtub or something pathetic like that. But you,” She cupped Joan’s cheeks again, and Joan couldn’t help but lean into the warmth of her hands, “you’re not doing that. You’re stronger than all of them combined, you know that?”

“I-I am?” Joan asked shyly.

“Yes, silly!” Miss Aragon said with a light laugh. “You’re so brave, Joan. Braver than you let yourself think.”

Joan blushed and looked away. Miss Aragon smiled down at her lovingly.

“And I, for one, am really looking forward to seeing you kill it on the dance floor,” Miss Aragon added, making Joan dissolve into giggles once again.

“Thank you, Miss Aragon,” Joan said. She threw her arms around Miss Aragon’s stomach and hugged her, much to her coach’s pleasant surprise. She heard Miss Aragon chuckle softly and return the embrace.

“Anything for you, sweetheart.” Miss Aragon said.

They sat there together on the floor, limbs intertwined, for a few more minutes until the bell rang, signaling that the fourth period would soon begin. Miss Aragon had to pull away and stand up, but Joan could have sworn she noticed some reluctance in her movements.

“Are you going to stay in here?” Miss Aragon asked.

Joan nodded. She pulled out a notebook and pencil from her nearby bag.

“I have something I need to plan.”

“Oh?” Miss Aragon tilted her head. “What is it?”

Joan grinned. “It’s a surprise.”

------

“Come on, you hotshots!” Aragon yelled, clapping her hands loudly. “I want to see you sweat!”

Although it wasn’t detention right now, she still thoroughly enjoyed making gym class a little more like hell than usual for the week-long punishment. She had the girls playing a rather fierce game of rugby out in the field. Nothing was more entertaining than watching these daisies slip and slide in the wet turf and barrel into each other to evade her scornful words.

“Maggie, get those knees up!” She shouted at the brown-haired student.

“I don’t like running!” Maggie wheedled in response. She narrowly avoided being plowed by a blonde girl much bigger than she was.

“Maria!” Aragon barked, rounding on the next student she caught slacking. “Question.”

Maria raised her head, squinting through a rain of sweat dripping into her eyes. She replied with a loud, bovine-like, “WHA?”

“Did you ride the struggle bus to school this morning?” Aragon asked. “Because you are just one hot mess express over there!”

Maria swallowed thickly and turned her attention back to the ball.

“It’s not a bomb, Katherine!” Aragon said, watching Katherine fumble and avoid the ball so she wouldn’t get hit or run into. “It’s not going to hurt you! Get in there and get some points for your team! You’re better than this!!”

Katherine nodded wordlessly and threw herself into the fray.

“Bessie, hi,” Aragon smiled at the bleached girl, who slowed down to look at her. “Do you smell that?”

Bessie blinked her big dark brown eyes in confusion.

“It’s the smell of FAILURE!” Aragon yelled.

Bessie whimpered loudly, and then whimpered even louder than that when the ball flew into her stomach. She fell backwards to the ground and quickly scrambled across the grass before she could get trampled by her classmates. Aragon watched her in amusement, then noticed Anne whispering to two other girls a few yards away. She locked in on her.

“Anne!” She roared. “Shut your mouth and get back to the game!”

Anne glared at her, but her features strangely evened out and calmed rather quickly. A smile spread on her lips.

“You’re right, Miss Aragon,” She said. “I am so sorry!”

Aragon was instantly suspicious. It wasn’t like Anne to be so agreeable to her scolding when she was worked up like she had been the past week. There was something off about that smile, too…

What was she planning?

------

Katherine could have spotted her from a mile away- Joan stuck out like a sore thumb in the makeup section of the department store.

Per Bessie’s frantic request, she was out getting more paints and art supplies for the decoration committee. However, she didn’t expect Joan to be there, poorly applying ruby red lipstick to her lips.

It was almost painful to watch. Joan’s hand slipped several times and streaked shiny crimson lines over the top of her mouth. There was even a moment where she flicked her tongue out to taste the gloss and instantly scrunched her face up in disgust. Katherine barely managed to muffle a laugh.

A few people were starting to stare. Two small children were giggling over the spectacle. A woman nearby looking through a selection of eye shadow watched Joan with an absolutely dismayed expression, like she couldn’t believe any girl in this day and age didn’t know how to properly apply makeup. Katherine rolled her eyes. Gender expectations.

Joan’s head swiveled around and she looked like a deer in headlights when she noticed Katherine standing there. Katherine gave her a warm smile as a truce gesture of sorts and stepped out of the art aisle she had been going through. She walked over, setting various paints and paintbrushes in the basket she was holding. Joan eyed her warily, poised and ready to run.

“Hey,” Katherine greeted casually.

“H-hi,” Joan replied in a squeaky voice. The overhead lights made her pale skin look very pasty, and the sheen of messy red gloss coating her lips only stuck out even more. She was trying very hard not to look at Katherine, but her eyes kept trailing over to the older girl.

“You come here often?” Katherine asked. Over Joan’s shoulder, she noticed a trio of Year 12’s from her school gliding out from the next aisle over and stopping to ogle her and Joan. She shot them a severe look and they moved on, muttering to each other.

“N-no,” Joan answered. She jammed the lid of the lipstick back onto the capsule and set it back on the small rack of gloss that was used for testing the colors. Although, they weren’t meant to actually be put on the lips, rather just the wrist or example board provided off to the side. Joan didn’t seem to know that, though. Katherine guessed that this was her first time ever being in the makeup section of a store.

There was an awkward beat of silence between the two of them. Joan was looking through the other selections of lipstick, but it was obvious she was watching Katherine out of the corner of her eye. Katherine wondered why she was so untrustworthy around her and seemingly everyone else, but perfectly okay with Anna.

Strange. Was that...envy bubbling up inside of her?

“You have trouble coloring in the lines, don’t you?” Katherine commented, finally breaking the tension between the two of them.

Joan blinked at her obliviously, like a little white calf that didn’t realize it had a rattlesnake wound up its leg.

“Huh?”

Katherine gestured vaguely for her lips. Joan looked in the mirror provided and jolted, only then realizing how messy her mouth was.

“Oh--”

She hurriedly began wiping the lipstick off with her arm. Katherine gave her a napkin from a box on the shelf, smiling in a humored way that she hoped didn’t come off as cruel or mocking.

“You know, you might want to try something a little less drastic.” Katherine said. She wove around Joan to get to her other side and began looking through the selection. After a moment of mentally comparing shades to Joan’s light skin tone, she plucked up a dark pink tube of lipstick. “Like...this one!”

She reached for Joan’s face to apply it, and Joan flinched away as if she were expecting a blow to the head, nearly falling over. Her eyes were suddenly bulging out of her skull in fright. Katherine mentally swore at herself.

Idiot. Of course that would startle her.

“Sorry,” Katherine said softly. “I should have asked first. Is it okay if I put this on you?” She opened her left hand harmlessly, and after a moment of consideration, Joan tentatively placed her chin into her palm. Katherine felt a strange fluttering sensation inside of her.

“So, you curve it around the bow of your lips like so…” Katherine explained, dragging the tip of the lipstick across Joan’s pale lips, giving them color so they wouldn’t look as leached as they always were. Joan watched her with wide eyes the entire time, never looking away. “And...now rub them together.”

Joan obeyed, rubbing her lips together and smearing the color into a darker, more prominent shade.

“And smack them!” Katherine demonstrated with a pop.

Joan blinked and then copied her. Pop, went her lips softly.

“There you go!” Katherine smiled. She screwed the lipstick back into its capsule and put it back before anyone could realize they were actually putting it onto someone’s face. “You can add some lip liner for a little extra drama…”

She trailed off, watching as Joan used a pad to wipe her lips clean. Secondhand embarrassment surged so strongly inside of her she felt her throat close up and face burn with heat. She snatched the pad away from Joan, startling her into bumping into the display of makeup and causing it to rattle. They both frantically steadied it as customers peered over curiously and a worker restocking some markers from the art section looked at them with an exasperatedly devastated expression. Katherine waved at him dismissively to let him know that they had it under control and everything was okay. He looked away, relieved at not having to confront any sort of issue and run the risk of being yelled at (not that Katherine thought she had any kind of Karen vibes… Joan certainly didn’t and didn’t look up to yelling at anyone).

“Sorry,” Katherine said to Joan, standing up fallen tubes of lipstick. “I didn’t mean to, uhh, freak out. It’s just--that’s not what these are for.” She shoved the pad into her purse, hoping the flickers of scarlet flames on her cheeks couldn’t be seen.

“Oh.” Joan said and choked out the slightest laugh, even though it was clear she thought the situation was far from funny. “I-I’m sorry.”

“No, no,” Katherine said. “It’s okay. Not your fault.”

Nobody told you… Her mind went on, and embarrassment was quickly replaced with pity and sadness. She couldn’t imagine what it must be like to have her biology and own bodily functions hidden from her for so long. No wonder Joan freaked out last Friday. There was so much blood, too, even for her first period… Even she had to think back on it and wonder if something was actually really wrong. Surely there wasn’t, though. If Joan was internally bleeding, she would be dead by now.

“I-I, uhh--” Joan started, and then clamped her mouth shut. She swerved away from Katherine and began walking quickly down the main aisle towards the back of the store. Katherine followed her.

“What?” She questioned.

“N-nothing,” Joan shook her head.

Joan turned, and Katherine saw that she was heading to the fabric area of the store. She tilted her head slightly and watched as the girl beelined for a roll of teal fabric, running her hands over it and rubbing it between her fingers. She turned away after a moment of feeling, going to a darker aquamarine shade, then orange, then purple, and then magenta. Both Katherine and the woman working the counter watched her process in a vaguely interested way.

“What are you doing?” Katherine asked.

“Looking,” Joan replied distractedly. She felt a roll of black mesh and instantly ripped her hand away with an expression of pure disgust. Katherine couldn’t help but laugh.

“Don’t like that, sweetie?”

“It’s too scratchy.” Joan said, shaking her hand in the air as if she were trying to erase the feeling of mesh against her skin. “Do people really wear that? What kind of self-respecting person would put that on?” She touched some fishnets next and recoiled like she had been burned, looking even more appalled. Katherine laughed again.

“Some people do, yes,” She said. “It’s kind of a gothic look.” She decided to leave out how she had a black mesh top that she liked to seduce Anna with when they were alone.

“It’s awful.” Joan stated firmly. She tugged off a waterfall of sunflower yellow fabric off of the wall and it all came tumbling down onto her. She tottered backwards, nearly collapsing under the weight of the material, then steadied herself and held out her arm, coiling a lacing of cloth around it. She inspected it for a moment, then began putting the fabric back onto its hook, much neater than it had been before. The woman at the counter blinked at her with an appraising look.

“So…” Katherine said idly, watching Joan dart over to another rack of fabrics. She’s never seen the girl’s eyes shine so much before. It was like she was in textile heaven. “Have you picked out your dress?”

“No,” Joan replied after a brief moment of hesitation. She unraveled a veil of iridescent green fabric, took one look at it, then wrapped it back up and put it back on its hook. “But I found a style that I like.” She thoughtfully touched her messenger bag.

“What color?” Katherine asked interestedly.

“I can’t decide,” Joan said, holding strips of saffron and azure and wrinkling her nose at the way it contrasted with her pale skin. “I’m--trying to figure out that now.”

Katherine’s eyes widened a little. “You make your own clothes?”

Joan looked a touch shy. “Sometimes.” She said. “It’d be cheaper to make my dress myself.”

“Oh, you are absolutely right.” Katherine said. “Those things are EXPENSIVE!”

A small smile twitched on Joan’s lips, then she got back to looking through the selections. She didn’t seem pleased with any of them offered, even though Katherine spotted at least four different shades she thought would make beautiful dresses.

“Well,” Katherine quickly started again, pouncing on an opportunity that lit up inside of her like a light bulb. “I don’t know if you want to, but maybe we can do a little fashion consultation thing? We could even model! Maria’s coming over Saturday afternoon before prom and she does these little shows to find the perfect style.”

Joan tensed, hands freezing in their process of sliding over a roll of crimson red cloth. She stared at it for a long moment, then pulled away, shaking her hands out like they had blood on them.

“I don’t know if I want to model,” She mumbled.

“Oh--”

Katherine blinked stupidly, now looking like the brain dead cow between the two of them. She didn’t know why she was expecting Joan to say yes. The girl didn’t exactly look like the type to be able to say no to people. Now she just felt bad for seemingly pressuring Joan into the hangout session.

“Sorry.”

Joan didn’t hear her apology, however, because she had already darted to another rack. Her eyes were wide and glowing, and she realized she was looking at a roll of pale flamingo pink silk. Carefully, like she thought it may disintegrate in her hands, Joan picked up the bulk and held it close to her chest, staring up with a dreamy, wistful expression.

That had to be the one.

“It’s so pretty,” Joan murmured as Katherine walked over, running her hand up and down the surface of the fabric. There was a smile ghosting over her lips, which still had remnants of the lipstick splotched over it.

“It is.” Katherine agreed. The shade of pink really fit well with Joan’s pale complexion, light hair, and icy eyes. “You’re gonna look great, I’m sure of it.” Then, idly, as she fiddled with the edge of some scratchy white cotton fabric, “I’m really glad you’re going to prom.”

Joan paused her process of thoroughly caressing the silk and blinked at Katherine in bright confusion.

“Why?”

A piece of Katherine’s heart broke and chipped off.

“I just thought you’d have a good time, that’s all.” Katherine said.

“Why?” Joan asked again, this time softer. Her eyebrows knitted together, and Katherine only now realized they were light brown instead of platinum blonde like her hair. Her pubic hair had been brown, too, which Katherine remembered with an internal cringe and a flash of intense guilt. She would never get over the culpability of harassing this young girl when she was completely naked.

“Why do you care if I have a good time?”

Katherine opened her mouth to answer, but nothing came out. Joan tilted her head at her.

“I mean, you’ve never really talked to me before,” She said, “and the only reason you’re probably talking to me right now is because none of your friends are around.”

Katherine sucked in a sharp breath, but released it softly. Out of the corner of her eye, she saw the lady at the counter listening with great intrigue, but was pretending to cut some fabric to make it seem like she wasn’t.

“Look,” Katherine said. “If you don’t want to go, then don’t go.”

“N-no, I want to go!” Joan sputtered out hurriedly, like she thought her ticket would be revoked if she didn’t speak fast enough. “I-I didn’t say I didn’t want to, I just-- I wished I was going ‘cause someone liked me, not because they feel sorry for me.”

“This is not a pity thing.” Katherine clarified. She was usually such a good liar, but she could hear the falsehood oozing between her words. Even the lady at the counter widened her eyes in a ‘yeah, okay’ sort of expression. “I don’t feel sorry for you.”

Joan laughed weakly. “Yes, you do.” She said. She gazed down at the roll of fabric in her arms, then hugged it closer to her. “You feel sorry for me--because you think you’re better than me.”

“I don’t think I’m better than you.” Katherine said.

Joan smiled tightly at her. “It’s okay,” She said. “Everyone does.” She turned to go pay for the fabric, but paused for just a moment and added, “Doesn’t mean it’s true, though.”

------

Joan placed a box of buttons and sequins and string down next to all her other sewing materials and stood back proudly, admiring her precise set up for a moment. There was the sewing machine, her rack of different colored threads, a gleaming pile of needles, the fabric, and then her dress sketches. The crucible lifted his wooden head from the floor and placed it heavily on the table, blinking his broken glass eyes at everything.

Joan summoned--was that the right word?--him again--she had decided he was a boy. She enjoyed his company, even if it were just herself who was controlling all his movements. If she didn’t think about it, then he almost seemed sentient.

“Want some tea, Mama?” Joan called into the den.

Most of the furniture and religious decorations were gone, broken up to form Judgement’s body. But Mama’s velvet throne chair remained, and that’s where she sat, sewing a dark grey embroidery and trying very hard not to look at her devil spawn and her horrid creation. She doesn’t reply to Joan’s question. Judgement let out a hiss of static. Joan sighed and went back to her project.

She picked up her sketches. After going through at least ten different designs, she was stuck on two. The first was long and flowing, with off-shoulder sleeves and a fishtail skirt, while the second had a cross-folded bust, loose skirt, and open, draped sleeves that reach down to her elbows and hang low like flamingo wings. She analyzed the two dress ideas for a moment, showing Judgement for his opinion, then looked up again.

“Mama?” She padded over to her mother. “Do you like this one or this one?”

Jane Seymour did not look up from her embroidery as Joan showed her the two drawings.

Joan waited for a moment, expecting a reaction, then smiled down at the second drawing.

“I think this one’s really pretty…” She murmured, already dazzled by it, even in a simple pencil-sketched form.

“It’s Godless.” Mama muttered.

Joan’s smile disappeared in an instant. She gave her mother a look of extreme offense.

“It’s not Godless, Mama.” She said. “I wish you could be happy for me.”

Mama’s dead, dull eyes wandered up to Joan’s face slightly, but almost instantly turned back to her embroidery. She began weaving the needle through the fabric again.

“There’s a mark on you now,” She said bitterly.

Joan blithely ignored her. “This one’s prettier!” She declared, beaming, and pranced back over to her sewing station in the next room.

“Pretty.” Judgement echoed in a high pitched feminine voice that was slightly edged with static. He coiled up into a spring-like formation so he could watch from a higher view point.

“Yes!” Joan bobbed her head eagerly. “It’s really pretty!” She grinned brightly at her sketch.

“Woe to the woman who makes garments for lustful purposes, for she is prideful and curses and rejects the Lord.” Mama said from her chair. She was looking at Joan intently, now, hands knotted and frozen in her embroidery.

Judgement cast her a dark look, his wooden facial features creaking threateningly as his mouth and eyes move. Joan just furrowed her eyebrows at her mother.

“Sometimes I think you make that stuff up.” She said.

“Ezekiel, Chapter 13.” Mama said. “Read it for yourself.”

“I’ll read it later.” Joan said dismissively, unfolding the cloth she got from the store.

“Read it now.”

“I’m bust, Mama!” Joan whined.

Mama set her needle and thread and embroidery aside, and approached Joan cautiously. Her eyes kept darting over to Judgement, who had his bladed tail poised and ready to strike. Joan took a deep breath and looked up from her project to meet her mother’s gaze.

“You’ve gone so far astray that I fear for you.” Mama said.

Joan hunched her shoulders in slightly. “Do you really think I’m going to burn in hell, Mama, just for going to my prom?” She asked meekly.

“I don’t want to think about what’s going to happen to you.” Mama answered. “Sin knows you now. It’ll find you.”

“Mama…” Joan whimpered out softly.

Mama advanced on Joan. Judgement swelled up, his platelets and wooden scales standing on edge to make him look bigger. Mama took a small step back, but didn’t stand down fully, even though Joan could easily see the terror in her eyes. Her mother wanted to run and hide and pray to God.

“Your sin will find you, Johanna,” Mama hissed. “And when it does, not even Jesus can help you.”

“Jesus will help me.” Joan said. “He will help me if I really need him.”

“Not if he doesn’t love you anymore.”

Mama’s words made it feel like the entire world was coming down on Joan’s shoulders. Her eyes widened and she watched, mouth agape, as Mama turned and went back to her chair to continue sewing. Not even Judgement moved- her mind was too shell shocked to control him.

And then, she’s marching forward before she’s even aware of what she was doing, burning flares of anger urging her onward. Judgement slithered after her, his body making a menacing scraping sound against the wooden floor. Mama didn’t look up at her.

“Jesus loves everybody, Mama.” Joan said, clenching her fingers into shaking fists at her side. “Even me.”

Mama glanced up at her and opened her mouth to retort, but Joan narrowed her eyes into slits and silenced her.

“Don’t say a word,” She warned, “or I’ll vibrate your insides so hard they burst, and don’t think I won’t do it.”

Mama became very pale. Judgement let out a pleased hiss. Joan turned her nose up and marched back over to her sewing station, where she got to work on her dress. Judgement played music that wasn’t religious for once, and Mama did nothing to stop it.

She couldn’t.

------

The black G-Wagen jostled violently as it drove up the dark dirt path that night, going twenty miles too fast on the unpaved road. Branches scraped against the room and mud squelched beneath the tires, and if she weren’t so excited for this, Anne might have been dismayed about her car getting all dirty. She made a mental note to wash it before her father saw the mess on the sides.

“Are you sure Henty isn’t around?” Cathy asked from the passenger’s seat. She was white knuckling the overhead handle, looking a lot less mature than she usually did. Anne rolled her eyes at her.

“Yes, I’m sure,” Anne answered.

“Where is he?” Thomas Culpeper, a distant cousin to Anne, piped up. He was crammed in the back with Maggie, Thomas Cromwell, and Anthony Lee, Maggie’s boyfriend, and kept being throwing from side to side with every bump they hit.

“Funeral.” Anne said. “For his mum or something? Doesn’t matter.”

“Okay, okay,” Thomas said. “I just don’t want to get caught.” The car went over a particularly rough pothole and his head smacked against the window. He whined sharply in pain, rubbing the impacted area, while Maggie and Anthony burst into laughter.

“We won’t get caught.” Anne said.

“Seems like a lot of work for a joke…” Cromwell muttered over the peals of giggling.

Anne jerked her head around, not watching the dark road ahead of her, and narrowed her eyes until she looked like a venomous snake.

“Are you pussying out?” She asked. “Do you want to get out?”

Cromwell stiffened. “No! No!” He said. “It’s a good joke!”

Anne made a pleased noise and looked forward again. Her bright yellow headlights cut through the brambles snarled around the road and illuminated the large grey building coming up in the distance. She finally began to slow the car down.

The night air was a strange mix if humidly warm and chillingly cold. The half moon glowed brightly in the bruise-dark sky, its light twinkling on the surface of a nearby pond and bathing the surrounded apple orchard in rays of luscious silver. A cow lowed from somewhere in the distance. Pigs and chickens snorted and clucked inside the barn.

Anne popped open the trunk and pulled out a thick sledgehammer. Anthony armed himself with a wicked-looking butcher’s knife while Cromwell and Maggie both grabbed a steel bucket each. Anne passed the sledgehammer to Thomas, who swung the ten-pound thing idly, making swishing noises in the air. Cathy waited by the front of the car, her arms crossed over her chest.

“What’s wrong, doll?” Anne asked, sauntering up to her. She stood on her tippy toes and nipped at Cathy’s bottom lip, slithering her arms around her waist. “You look a little blue.”

Cathy ruffled ever so slightly, touching her custom made blue leather jacket as her girlfriend giggled. She sighed and wrapped her arms around Anne, returning the embrace.

“I’m not sure this is the best idea,” She said. “Can’t you just forget about it?”

Anne narrowed her eyes. Her shellac green nails curled into Cathy’s lower back.

“No,” She hissed. “I cannot. I will not forget about it.” She stepped back, huffing, not realizing she looked like a child throwing a temper tantrum in the moonlight. “I was humiliated, Cathy! I can just let something like that go! It was AWFUL!”

Cathy frowned at Anne with a pitiful look.

“And you know who I blame?” Anne went on, fuming with rage. “That goddamn freak!” She kicked a rock and sent it bouncing across the dirt before it got stuck in some mud. “Joan Seymour is going to learn not to play with fire sooner or later. And it’s about time someone gave her a real lesson.”

“Yeah!!” Maggie agreed loudly, always backing up her best friend. Anne grinned at her brightly.

“This’ll definitely teach her,” Anthony said, glancing at the knife Cromwell was twisting to catch beams of moonlight on the blade. “I think I would kill myself if what you’re planning were to happen to me.”

A dark thrill crackled through Anne’s body. Joan Seymour? Killing herself? Oh, the image of that stupid cow hanging from a noose or bleeding out from slit wrists or dying from a bullet to her retarded brain sounded like a dream come true. It filled her with a sick kind of euphoria that made her feel tingly and pleasured. A crooked, bloodthirsty smile curled on her lips. She doesn’t notice the wary glance Cathy gave her.

“Hope for that,” She said. “Come on.”

They all approached the barn, with Cathy and Thomas being stupidly overly cautious despite Anne telling them several times that Old Man Henty wasn’t home. They hopped the outer fence and walked inside, where the smell of livestock became much thicker.

“Ugh, smells like shit in here!” Cromwell exclaimed.

“Well, yeah, dumbass.” Maggie said, rolling her eyes at him. She didn’t appear to be fazed by the smell at all, or was just really good at hiding that she was.

Passing by an indoor chicken coop and fenced area for cows, they soon came to the pigpen. There were dozens of pigs, Berkshires and Welshes and British Lops and British Saddlebacks, either sleeping or moseying around listlessly. A flat white snout stuck through the bars of the fence enclosing their pen and grunted at the newcomers.

Thomas nudged Anthony, then Anthony nudged Thomas, and then the two of them vaulted forward over the fence, squealing and snorting and making a complete ruckus. A few of the pigs didn’t even move from the mud they were sprawled in, not even caring about all the noise, while others screeched and sprinted away.

“Idiots,” Maggie rolled her eyes.

“You’re dating one of them.” Anne said and laughed at the way Maggie’s nose scrunched up. She hopped the fence and stepped into the pigpen, while Maggie, Cromwell, and Cathy waited on the other side.

“Hey, piggy, piggy, piggy, piggy!” Thomas cried, bending over and cackling at a lazy British Saddleback with a thick white neck.

“Where’s your leg?” Anthony asked an orange Tamworth that was missing one of its back legs. “This one.” He then declared. “We should kill this one. It’s crippled. We’d be doing it a favor.”

Anne studied the orange swine. It definitely did have a pitiful aura, what with the way it hopped awkwardly when it moved, but it was much too small.

“We need a bigger one.” She said, scanning the pigs grunting around her.

“Pick one that looks like the girl,” Cromwell suggested from the top of the fence he was perched on.

“You,” Anne pointed to him with an appraising look, “are starting to grow on me.”

Cromwell puffed out his chest importantly. Cathy pursed her lips, but didn’t say anything.

Anne looked through all the pigs, and then spotted one that caused a sinister smirk to spread on her face.

“That one.” She said.

It was a big, fat, pink British Lop so light it looked white in the moonlight it was standing under in the outside area of the pen. It had giant, crusty teats and huge floppy ears that it could barely see out from under. Anthony and Thomas lunged at it, shrieking callouts and laughing maddeningly, but the sow just looked up at them dumbly, its ears just barely shifting out of its face.

Just like Joan Seymour.

“Whenever you’re ready, Tommy.” Anne said to her younger cousin.

It was only then that Thomas seemed to realize that he was holding the sledgehammer...which meant he had to kill the pig.

He hefted it in his hands, held his breath, then raised it over his head and--

Thomas faltered. He grit his teeth, staring down at the sow that was now curiously nudging one of his shoes with its snout, then released the tension in his arms.

“I can’t do it.” He said miserably.

Anne glared at him. Maggie rolled her eyes. Cathy gave him a pitying look.

“Are you kidding me?” Anne said. “Really, Tommy?”

“I can’t, okay?!” Thomas cried. He held out the sledgehammer. “Y-you do it.” His eyes wandered to Cromwell.

“Dude, don’t look at me!” Cromwell said sickly. He leaned back so far he nearly fell off the fence.

“I don’t believe you,” Anne said to her cousin. “Does being a little bitch run in our fucking family or something? First Kat and now you?” She shook her head, tutting.

“Take it.” Thomas said, shoving the sledgehammer forward in the air. When Anne just stared at him he said again, “Seriously, take it!”

“You fucking pussy.” Anne hissed scathingly. She snatched the sledgehammer from Thomas and shoved him aside into the fence. She looked over at Anthony questiongly.

“Don’t worry,” Anthony said, touching his thumb to the honed edge.

“Right down the throat.” Anne reminded.

“I know.”

Anne nodded. She twirled the sledgehammer in her hands and gazed down at the sow at her feet. A disturbing smirk crept back onto her lips.

“Little pig, little pig, let me in,” She sang, circling around the sow. She then did an awful imitation of Joan Seymour’s voice, “Not by the hairs on your chinny-chin-chin!” She hefted the sledgehammer, her expression darkening, crooked smile twisting. “Then I’ll huff...and I’ll puff...and I’ll bash your brains in!”

The sow looked up, innocent black eyes peeking out from under floppy pink ears, and Anne put the sledgehammer right in between them.

The sound was like dropping a pumpkin from a great height- wet, gushy, and absolutely magnificent. The sow dropped to the ground, its skull dented and cracked open wide, blood and brains drooling out. Thomas keeled over the side of the fence and vomited. Anne regarded him with a disgusted expression.

“Anthony,” She said, swiveling her head around to Maggie’s boyfriend. “Come on. Maggie, the bucket.”

Anthony nodded as Maggie hopped the fence and set one of the steel buckets down. Anthony lifted the sow by its thick snout, open black eyes angled towards the moon, and slit its throat.

The blood flow was immediate and glorious. Anne, Anthony, and Maggie all got squirted by the cut aorta. Thomas gagged again.

“Good,” Anne murmured. She gripped the sledgehammer tightly, riding the ways of pleasantly gory ecstasy. “That one, too.” She nodded at a large black Berkshire boar.

“Jesus, Anne.” Cathay said. “Isn’t this en-”

“That one.” Anne repeated.

“Annie, can I cut its throat this time?” Maggie asked eagerly.

“Of course, love!” Anne said, earning a sick squeal of glee from her friend. She lumbered over to the boar, unable to stop grinning. “Don’t worry, piggy, don’t worry,” She cooed to it. “Auntie Annie’s going to bash your fucking head in and you won’t have to worry about the fryer no more!”

She raised the sledgehammer again and smashed much harder than before. Mushed brain matter came spilling out instantly, wetting the dirt of the pigpen. Maggie excitedly cut the boar’s throat and began filling up the second bucket.

“Thomas that isn’t a fucking disappointment,” Anne said.

It took him a moment, but Cromwell realized it was him being spoken to. He perked up, attentive, but wary.

“Yeah?”

“Go get the spare bucket in the car.”

“Anne.” Cathy said. “This is enough.”

“Shut up, Cathy.” Anne snapped. She looked back at Cromwell. “Go.”

Cromwell jumped off of the fence and ran out of the barn. Cathy grumbled something as Anne walked over and pulled her into a heated kiss. She wondered if her girlfriend could taste the pig blood spattered on her face.

“Cheer up, my love,” Anne said, cupping Cathy’s cheeks. “This is fun! No need to be so grouchy.” She kissed her again, letting her tongue snake into Cathy’s mouth.

They eventually pulled back, panting, ropes of saliva connecting their mouths together. Cathy smiled flusteredly.

“I guess...it is a pretty good joke.” She said.

“See?” Anne grinned, kissing down her jawline. Her breath was hot on Cathy’s tender skin. “I told you.”

Cromwell soon returned with the extra bucket. Anne thanked him and went back over to the dead pigs. She took the butcher knife from Maggie and cut open the sow’s belly.

“What are you doing?” Thomas asked. He was ghostly pale in the moonlight and leaning against the fence.

Anne shot him a scornful look. “Making this even better.” She replied and began pulling out the sow’s organs. Thomas vomited once again and she rolled her eyes.

Slowly but surely, the third bucket was filled up with pig guts. Intestines, the womb, the uterus, the heart and stomach. When it was halfway full, she cut open the boar, took its intestines, then sliced off the scrotum and removed the testicles.

The smell of blood was thick, rank, and coppery in the air. Anne was slimed up to her elbows in gore. Everyone was staring at her in wide-eyed awe.

“Let’s go,” She said, slinging the sledgehammer over her shoulder and picking up the bucket of guts. “Don’t spill a goddamn drop or else.” She warned Anthony and Cromwell when they lifted their own buckets. She didn’t trust her pussy cousin, Thomas, to do it.

They all walked back to the car, where they poured the blood and guts into a large cooler that was brought along. Anne didn’t bother cleaning her arms when she got back into the driver’s seat; she quite liked the aroma coming from the mess. She breathed it in deeply and smiled, leaning back in her seat.

“Pig’s blood for a pig,” She mused. “That freak is never going to know what hit her.”

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dailyaudiobible · 3 years

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04/27/2021 DAb Transcript

Judges 7:1-8:17, Luke 23:13-43, Psalms 97:1-98:9, Proverbs 14:7-8

Today is the 27th day of April welcome to the Daily Audio Bible I'm Brian it is great to be here with you today a little later than usual. Now for…most everybody's probably not going to notice that this is a little bit late but those of you in the UK for sure will and those of you early risers on the East Coast will. We’re in the 4 o'clock hour this morning and we've been up all night. We’re late a little bit because…well…China went into labor and she's been in labor all the way around the clock and she has successfully delivered a baby girl that is pretty much as all newborns are, perfect. And once we knew for sure she was in labor and was going to give birth at some point in the night then we’ve been waiting to make this announcement. So, China has had her baby daughter, our granddaughter. I don't know the weight yet or the length yet. She was born at 4:14 this morning. And we’re gonna have this news out within the hour, the hour of her birth. So, we’ve been…we’ve been keeping vigil. Jill has been with China the whole way here as has Ben of course. And they have decided to name this little girl Reagan Brave Brown and she is a brave little daughter of the king. She's our little Reagan the Brave and everybody is safe and sound and exhausted and a full of adrenaline and I haven’t even had a cup of coffee yet. I think there’s water boiling in the background here. Just trying to be able to make this announcement. So, I'm sure before the days out we’ll have pictures posted and the details given. But there’s a new daily audio baby and her name is Reagan and she's eating and she’s sleeping, and we haven't even…she hasn’t even been weighed yet, but we didn’t want to wait a whole day to tell everybody. So, this is the good news. All is well, the baby has been born, everyone is safe. And, so, let's…let's now do what we have come here to do and read the Scriptures. And today we read in honor of Reagan the Brave who was born April 27, 2021. Okay. So, yesterday we were introduced to a man named Gideon in the Old Testament in the book of Judges. Gideon becomes one of the judges of Israel and we will continue with his story today. We’re reading from the Good News Translation this week. Judges 7:1 through 8:17.

Commentary:

Okay. So, today in the book of Judges the…the battle for which Gideon was called that was waged today. Although Gideon for his part, he had an army of 32,000 people but ended up confronting the enemy with only 300 people as God whittled down the army so that basically so that Gideon's early on question could be answered. Gideon early on in this story was asking the angel of the Lord, “where is this mighty God that did things that we've heard of from our ancestors, the great things of old?” God was inviting Gideon into one of those stories. And, so, a 300-person army confronted essentially three different armies who had banded together to raid and pillage and destroy. And it's interesting to see Gideon's confidence grow. At first, he’s like, “where is the God that did great things”, right? And then it…it went to, “Oh, the God who did great things is right here in front of me and I have borne witness to this. Am I gonna die?” It went from that to, “if you are truly calling me will you just give me confidence through this sign with dew? Can there be dew on this cloth, but not on the ground?” And then he did it the next day. “Can there be due on the ground but not on this cloth?” After that we don't really see Gideon confused anymore about who he’s following so when this 32,000-person army gets whittled down to 300 Gideon remains confident in the Lord. And let's be honest, 32,000 people, that’s a lot of people. If you’re going confront another army that's a lot of people depending on how many people they've got. But if they have an army that’s like covering the ground like locusts and their camels are as many as the sands on the seashore, that's all a lot of people. So, 300 looks more like a suicide mission than a confrontation with an enemy army. But the Lord had come before them and actually did what He said He was going to do, and the Israelites were set free. We’re not done with Gideon's story. There’s actually a dark chapter in the story to come before us, but it gives us a real sense of the times, times of the judges. So, the tribes of Israel have settled. This is a tribal time. They are tribes of Israel. And as we began the book of Judges, we were told that everyone was doing what they…whatever they thought was right in their own eyes. And we’ll get some glimpses of the different things that that can look like as we continue the journey through the book of Judges.

In the book of Luke today for the third time this year we have encountered the story of Jesus death. This, His trial and execution. And today we read of His crucifixion and that He hung there in agony and…and took more and more verbal abuse, even as He was dying. And in the face of that He displayed forgiveness, which…which really is the centerpiece isn’t it, that God would forgive us and welcome us into his family. And I know, we…we…we celebrated Easter just a few weeks ago. So, this is reasonably fresh in our mind. And we might even think, “yeh. We just made a big to do of that just a couple weeks ago when we were moving through holy week and celebrating Easter. There's just never a wrong time to meditate upon this though, to consider what kind of love we’re talking about because that's the kind of love that can change the world, that's the kind of love that conquers all according to the Scriptures. So, it's important that we give some time today to just meditate upon the sacrifice of Jesus. We will…well…I mean we…we’ve read through that story, that part of the story three times now - Matthew Mark and Luke - and these are the synoptic Gospels. We only have one gospel left after this, the gospel of John. We will only encounter this story one more time during this year. And, so, it's always important to just slow things down and become very grateful for what we have because we have been rescued.

Prayer:

Jesus is impossible to use words whether there roughly hewn or whether there just beautifully ornate words. There are no words that actually can add up to the description of what You've done for us. And, so, it would be maybe easier for us to just stay here in silence just in attitude that is grateful from the bottom of our hearts. And we plan to do today, just spend some time thinking this through and being in a space of gratitude and silence before You, thanking You, thanking You, knowing that our words fall short. And, so, we stand before You silent, not because we can’t find words to say but because this is the most honest thing we can do, present ourselves before You without a bunch of explanation. We are here and we are here because You saved us, and we are grateful, and we are expressing that. And, so, come Holy Spirit into this we pray. In the name of Jesus, we ask. Amen.

Announcements:

dailyaudiobible.com is home base, it’s the website, its where you find out what's going on around here.

What’s going on around here right now is Reagan's birth and we will work to get pictures, all…all of that. We’re like really delirious, kind of right now we’re really focused on what we’re doing and one foot in front of the other. That's kinda how it gets when there's a severe lack of sleep going on but we’ll definitely…we’ll deftly get the word out on social media as soon as…as soon as China says we can. And we’ve had a running…how long…how long will this baby be, what will this baby's birthday be, what will the baby weigh…in our family for a long time…so we don't even know who’s going to win that one. We’ll post that stuff too as soon as we…as soon as we know. But we couldn’t wait any longer, wanted to get the news out and literally you’re hearing this within the hour of her birth. So, thank you for your prayers over everything that goes into bringing a new baby into the world over this little family, over her mommy and her healing, over this little girl who has had to trust and be thrust into a whole new existence that she’s never known before. And she's been experiencing it for less than an hour, so she's safe with her mommy and she knows that, and she knows the voice of her father. And this is a good place to start. So, thank you for your prayers.

That's it for today. I’m Brian I love you and I'll be waiting for you here tomorrow.

Community Prayer and Praise:

Hi this is Jackie from Oregon I called to pray for Honeybee from Louisiana who's had twenty eye surgeries. I feel in my spirit the need to pray for you. Just talking on this podcast, I know God has a way of healing. I know it's come to a place where that's your only option and I really pray very hard for you in the name of Jesus that this eye be completely healed and restored. I know Jesus can do it. I know it's up to him. And I pray for that to happen. Thank you.

Hey, this call is for honeybee from Louisiana. Your call played today Thursday April 22nd and right away you caught my attention honeybee because my name is Melissa and that means honeybee. And, so, I have another friend who is also named Melissa and we call each other honeybee. So, right away you had my attention. But just listening to your request for your eyes for your site for the multiple surgeries you've endured and just the difficult spot you're at, I just want you to know that I…I’m praying for you now and I will continue to pray for you as the Holy Spirit brings you to my mind. And I'm just praying for God to do a miracle. I just kept thinking of the story of Jesus healing the blind men, how He just did it in different ways. You know, all the stories of the blind men healed in the Bible, they’re done differently. And He heals differently but He does heal. He's got the power to do that. And while you're waiting for that healing, I'm just praying for the peace of the Holy Spirit to surround you and encourage you. Be encouraged and blessed my sister, my fellow honeybee.

Hello Daily Audio Bible family this is Tony the truck driver. I haven't called in in probably two or three years, but I still listen every day and support in partnership with the DAB. And today I just called with a heavy heart. One of my fellow truck drivers at my job was tragically killed today. Just pumping fuel in his truck, a guy came and just shot him for no reason and then took his own life. His name was Raymond Ramirez. He’s from Allentown PA. He leaves behind a wife and three young children. So, I’ve just been in prayer for him and his family…for his family all day. Everybody at the job has a heavy heart. So, I’m just asking you family to pray for his family. Just pray for the peace that Christ can give him…give his family Lord and that they would…He would just be with him, be with their family in this time, that they would have the peace that surpasses all understanding our Lord and saver can give. Thank you, family. Love you. Still listening. I'm definitely gonna try to call more often. Blind Tony I heard you one day still talk…shouting out me and my son AJ. He's doing great. He's actually gonna be 20 in a week or so. So, thank you for all you guys prayers. I'll be talking to you. God bless.

Hi, Olivia this is Dawn Rising in Michigan. I'm so glad you're in our community now and I just wanted to pray for you in your situation. I know it can be very confusing when you love somebody. You wanted to hear from people. So, I took that as an open invitation to give my opinion. I too was in an unequally yoked relationship for three years and I loved the person, but God gave me the foresight to be able to think of ahead of my current situation and how I wanted to raise my children and it didn't match up with the person that I was with. So, you know, if you want to look forward into your life and see how your life goals and how God's will for you could be obtained with the current person. So, just take a look at that and if, you know, and look into his heart and if there's room for change, but don't yoke yourself to somebody, you know, that will not want to change because it will be forever an uphill battle. And, you know, it'll be like the idols in…with the Canaanites. You'll be tempted to sway his way unfortunately. So, anyway, praying for you my friend and it's…it's not easy and I…I don't envy your situation because I've been in it. Anyway, we love you. We’ll pray for you.

Hi guys my name is Kimmy I'm calling in because Olivia from New Mexico, I'm sorry if I did not pronounce that right, your ask for prayer really, really spoke to me as my best friend of two…just broke up with her boyfriend of two years because they were unequally yoked. And, so, your stories were similar, and I just wanted to encourage you to continue to pursue the Lord and just pray, be in constant prayer to know what to do. But I wanted to encourage you with the words that my best friend had spoken to me was that she broke up with her boyfriend not out of a lack of love for him but out of a greater love for the Lord. And, so, whatever the will of the Lord is, I think being open and willing to hear it and to obey it is really important and I'll be praying for you no matter what the Lord…no matter what you decide to do. But I wanted to read to you Philippians 3 versus 7 through 11 which says, “but whatever gain I had I counted as loss for the sake of Christ. Indeed, I count everything as lost because of the surpassing worth of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord. For His sake I have suffered the loss of all things and count them as rubbish in order that I may gain Christ and be found in Him, not having a righteousness of my own that comes from the law but that which comes through faith in Christ, the righteousness from God that depends on faith, that I may know Him and the power of His resurrection and may share His sufferings becoming like Him __ that by any means possible I may obtain the resurrection from the dead. I hope this has been an encouragement. And yeah, just keep pursuing the Lord. Be in constant prayer to know what to do because He's right there with you and He holds your heart in His hands and I’m praying for you.

Hi, I'm Ethan from Indiana and I just wanted to say thank you guys for doing this. And it really helps me because I can listen to the Bible while I'm in the shower or something like that and I can listen to the word of God. Thank you for everything. And I just pray that you guys are…have a blessed life and I pray that you guys have great days while you guys are in...

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soundofseventeen · 4 years

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Can I Have This Dance? Pt. 4 (Kwon Soonyoung)

Hi! I have about 3 of the requests done. Here’s part 4!! I hope yall are enjoying this!! 💛

Masterlist

“So, you think you’re ready for tomorrow?” Soonyoung asked, finishing your final lesson. You were laying on the dance studio floor, hands covering your face.

“Am I?” You looked at him, Soonyoung just shaking his head.

“Yeah, I think you are.” He smiled, once again ignoring his heartbeat. Every day this happened, he came up with some new excuse as to why his heart was doing that. Today his excuse was that he had just spent the last 2 hours dancing with you.

“I’m still so nervous…” You said, putting your hands over your face again.

“That’s just because you hadn’t danced with him yet. Once you get there tomorrow, you’ll be fine.” Soonyoung said, choosing to ignore the little pang he had when he mentioned your boyfriend.

“You’re right. God, you’re right! I just need to calm down.” You said, sitting up but staying on the floor. “It’s kind of weird that this is our last lesson, isn’t it?”

“Yeah, a bit. I kind of got used to seeing you.” Soonyoung said, leaning on the wall. “Seungcheol is going to miss you too.” You grinned, looking over at Soonyoung.

“It’s been fun hanging out with you guys. I don’t know, you’re easy to spend time with. I’m going to miss that.”

“You could always still come hang out with us. I’m sure the guys wouldn’t mind.” Soonyoung offered, you sighing.

“I don’t know, I wouldn’t want to come off as annoying or something.” You smiled, Soonyoung tilting his head.

“Well, we could still hang out every once in a while, if you wanted.” Soonyoung said, heart beating quicker as your face lit up at the suggestion. He didn’t even have an excuse for it that time.

“Really?” Soonyoung nodded, you smiling at him. That damn smile. “I… I would love that.”

“Great. Well, we can do that then.”

“I should probably go. It’s getting late and I gotta catch the bus.” You said, standing up and grabbing your things. “Plus, it’s going to be a long day tomorrow to get ready for this party.” You took a deep breath, looking at Soonyoung.

“Yeah, get home safe, okay?” He said, you nodding your head.

“Oh! Before I go!” You turned around and looked back at him, startling him a little bit. “Okay, there’s this bar that is having this like, global experience thing on Thursday and Jiwoo is working some shoot that night and Daeho is going to be working on some project at work, would you want to go to that?”

“...This Thursday?” Soonyoung asked. You immediately squished up your face.

“Is that too soon? I’m sorry, you can totally just forget I asked and we can-”

“No, no, I’d love to!” Soonyoung interrupted, smiling at you. “I just have to make sure my schedule is good, but that sounds fun.” You smiled at him, nodding your head.

“Alright. I will see you Thursday then!” You said, skipping off down the hall to leave. Soonyoung shook his head, not sure how he felt about this.

Soonyoung sighed, waiting in line for his tea. He was mentally preparing for a day full of rehearsals and dance practices, then tonight he had to go with Seungkwan and Seokmin to find a birthday gift for Chan’s birthday. It wasn’t too unusual of a day, but he just wasn’t looking forward to it today. He felt like he had a thundercloud over his head all morning, and he couldn’t figure out why.

As he grabbed his tea, he turned to leave when he saw a familiar face. He checked the time on his phone, figuring he had a few minutes. He went to sit across from the person, smiling as they looked up.

“Oh hey!” Jiwoo smiled, closing her computer. “How’s it going?”

“Not bad. Just some pre-rehearsal tea.” He held up the cup, Jiwoo smiling.

“Pre-shoot coffee.��

“At least some of our rituals stayed the same.” Soonyoung chuckled, Jiwoo nodding.

“Tell me about it.” She took a sip, looking at Soonyoung. “Thanks again for helping Y/N, by the way. She’s so excited about tonight now that she’s pretty sure she won’t make a fool of herself.”

“Ah, it was no problem.” He said, shrugging his shoulders. “It was actually kind of fun.”

“That’s how it sounded.” Jiwoo smiled. “She always came back from the lessons in a good mood. Maybe you’re a happy virus?”

“Nah, I think that’s her.” Soonyoung grinned, looking around the shop, Jiwoo tilting her head a little bit. A thought crossed her head, but she decided not to voice it.

“She’s still pretty anxious about tonight, but I think you helped her a lot.” She said, Soonyoung nodding.

“Hey, can I ask you something?” Jiwoo nodded, taking another sip. “What… What do you have against Daeho?”

“What do you mean?”

“I mean, no offense but he clearly isn’t your favorite person. And this little old lady said something about hearing stories about him from Y/N and-”

“Oh, you met Mrs. Lee?” Jiwoo looked at him, Soonyoung nodding. Jiwoo pondered for a second, then let out a sigh. “Okay, no he’s not my favorite person in the world.”

“Why though?”

“Because… Okay, and keep this in mind that I’ve only had small interactions with the guy, but he’s just… He’s kind of a prick. He’s really stuck up and pretentious and he always acts like he’s so much better than everyone else. I don’t know, he just rubbed me the wrong way when we met and hasn’t done anything to change that.”

“But you let your friend date him?” Soonyoung asked, Jiwoo sighing again.

“Yeah. He’s… He’s not like that with her. Look, I still think that she deserves way better, and I don’t appreciate how they got together in the first place, but he treats her well. He doesn’t pressure her into stuff she’s uncomfortable with, and she’s happy with him. So I promised myself not to interfere unless I thought he was going to hurt her somehow.”

“Wait, how did they get together in the first place?” Jiwoo thought for a second, then pointed a finger at him.

“You can never tell Y/N, it would crush her, you understand?” Soonyoung was concerned, but nodded his head. “Okay, one of his friends told me that when they met, the only reason he even began flirting with her and acting interested was to piss off his parents. They had some big argument, and he thought that the best way to get back at them was to hook up with some girl who they would never approve of.” Jiwoo shook her head, Soonyoung still feeling concerned. “I guess he developed feelings or whatever, because obviously they’re still together, but Y/N doesn’t know so you can’t tell her. She was so excited that someone like him was interested in her.”

“Oh…” Soonyoung said, taking a sip of his drink.

“Look, Soonyoung, you don’t have to worry about her. She’s a big girl. She’s tougher than she looks.” Jiwoo said, patting Soonyoung’s hand. “Honestly, I’m just waiting for the day she realizes she’s too good for him and breaks it off.”

“I’m not worried.” Soonyoung said, Jiwoo raising an eyebrow.

“I know it’s been a while Soon, but yeah, you are. It’s a little obvious.”

“Okay, I have to get to rehearsal.” Soonyoung said, Jiwoo laughing.

“Deep breaths Soon, deep breaths.” Jiwoo said, Soonyoung waving a hand as he walked away, Jiwoo shaking her head. “Maybe…”

You were just leaving the flower shop, waiting for the bus to show up. You tapped your foot on the concrete, wishing it would just get here. You still had to get home and do your hair and makeup and change, maybe you would try a new perfume tonight? Finally, the bus showed up, you getting on and finding a seat quickly. You were driving through the city, watching the buildings go by, mentally going through the steps Soonyoung taught you in your head.

You saw your phone light up, the picture of you and Daeho showing up. Smiling, you hit answer and brought the phone to your ear.

“Hey you!” You grinned.

“Hey.”

“I’m on my way to the apartment right now. Listen I was thinking of trying a new perfume tonight. Do you prefer-”

“Listen, uh, tonight’s not happening anymore.” Daeho said, your heart falling a bit.

“Oh… What happened? Did they cancel it?” You asked, hearing Daeho sigh.

“Not exactly, the party is still happening just… I can’t bring you.”

“What?” You asked, starting to feel tears prick at your eyes. “Why not?”

“My parents friends have this daughter who couldn’t get a date so they’re making me take her. It’s kind of this weird situation, so I have to do it.”

“But… But…” You said, looking at your lap. “But I bought a dress and took… Daeho I learned how to actually dance for this…”

“Y/N, I’m really sorry, but it’s not happening. I’ll make it up to you, I swear.” You felt a tear drop from your face, shaking your head.

“Yeah, okay.” You muttered, wiping a tear from your face.

“I’ll talk to you tomorrow, okay?” You hummed in response. “Thanks Y/N, I love you.” Daeho said, hanging up before you could even say it back.

You put your phone in your lap, trying not to cry. At least not until you got home.

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downn-in-flames · 4 years

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let’s keep it casual

this was written for a trope stew challenge on @hpfanfictalk - my assigned tropes were 1) roaring rampage of revenge, 2) snowball lie, 3) friends with benefits, 4) it's personal, and 5) mistaken for betrayal. somehow, i think i managed to squish them all in here :P

read it on: hpft | ao3

[Tuesday 10 May, 15:04]

james potter: u up?

lily evans: it’s 3pm

james potter: good observation

lily evans: you need to get more creative with your ‘hi i’m bored can you come over and fuck me’ lines

james potter: did it work though?

lily evans: be there in 15

[Tuesday 10 May, 16:42]

sirius black: ran into lily in the lobby a few minutes ago sirius black: tell me, when are you going to finally own up to the fact that you fancy the shit out of her and aren’t just casually fucking her with no feelings involved

james potter: hmm, but see, that would require that statement to actually be true james potter: seriously, it’s just hooking up james potter: we’ve got a good thing going, i’m not going to ruin that by catching feelings

sirius black: ~catching~ feelings? sirius black: dude sirius black: feelings have long since been caught sirius black: by both of you

james potter: ur wrong but i’m not arguing that point with u anymore

sirius black: because your counterarguments are shit and you know it

[Wednesday 11 May, 20:53]

lily evans: i’m going to kill him i’m going to kill him i’m going to kill him lily evans: I’M GOING TO KILL HIM lily evans: give me ONE good reason not to commit murder right now

james potter: you can’t fuck me if you’re in prison?

lily evans: damn you have a point there

james potter: also why are you contemplating murder, that seems extreme

lily evans: two words for you: severus fucking snape

james potter: that’s three words

lily evans: do you want me to kill you too, bud??

james potter: you can’t fuck me if i’m dead james potter: but seriously, what did that greasebag do

lily evans: remember when i beat him to checking out the last copy of that chemistry research journal from the library?

james potter: i believe you described it as ‘the most victorious day of the semester to date’

lily evans: and i stand by that lily evans: but ANYWAYS lily evans: the creepy fucker SNUCK INTO MY ROOM and STOLE IT lily evans: and had the nerve to leave me a fucking LOVE NOTE in its place

james potter: he left you a love note?? james potter: what does it say?

lily evans: that is not the part of this story you should be fixating on lily evans: he wheedled his way through the front desk security and came into my room and WENT THROUGH MY STUFF lily evans: not to mention, the damn journal is still checked out in my name lily evans: so if he doesn’t return it on time, I’M going to have to pay for it lily evans: those things are expensive as FUCK

james potter: what a fucking twat

lily evans: i just lily evans: i can’t with him lily evans: the creepiness and borderline obsession with me is one thing lily evans: the fact that he acts like i owe it to him to be in love with him is another lily evans: but straight-up violating my privacy AND sabotaging my perfect reputation with the university library?? lily evans: i’m taking him down

james potter: hell yeah, you show that fucker once and for all

lily evans: wanna be my accomplice

james potter: that’s perhaps the sexiest thing you’ve ever said james potter: ofc i will be

lily evans: will text u when i come up with the appropriate revenge scheme

[Thursday 12 May, 13:02]

lily evans: meet me at the library in an hour

james potter: is this part of aforementioned revenge scheme?

lily evans: obviously

james potter: i shall be there

[Thursday 12 May, 15:23]

james potter: okay what the fuck was that

lily evans: in my defense it was not supposed to go that far

james potter: mind telling me what you DID have in mind when telling the librarian that we’re engaged?? james potter: because i’ve been wracking my brain and i’ve got nothing

lily evans: she was supposed to give me edit access to my account to fix my last name lily evans: which she did lily evans: and thanks to my BRILLIANT computer skills from there, the journal is checked out in snape’s name instead of mine lily evans: but clearly i underestimated how close i am with the uni library staff

james potter: no shit

lily evans: anyways, what do you want on our wedding registry

james potter: what

lily evans: i’ve got to give her a wedding website link!! she asked for it, i can’t very well show up at the library next week and not have a wedding website for her lily evans: i also ordered a £5 ring on etsy lily evans: it’s huge and tacky and exactly the sort of thing a trust fund baby like u would propose with

james potter: jfc james potter: put one of those mini waffle makers on there james potter: also i’m offended that you think so poorly of my ring-picking skills

[Friday 13 May, 9:10]

lily evans: hi, i have a weird request

remus lupin: that’s always a concerning sentence

lily evans: can you take fake engagement photos for me and james?? lily evans: will pay you in bourbon and chocolate

remus lupin: ……. literally what the fuck, lily remus lupin: why on earth do you need fake engagement photos

lily evans: i need them for our fake wedding website

remus lupin: somehow, that still doesn’t make this make any more sense

lily evans: it’s a long story lily evans: can you though?

remus lupin: *sigh* yes

lily evans: bless u

[Monday 16 May, 8:57]

lily evans: thoughts?? lily evans: Attachment - 12 Images

james potter: wow james potter: those look… really good

lily evans: we actually look like an engaged couple lily evans: like….. go us lily evans: alright, time to upload these bad boys onto the website

[Monday 16 May, 9:12]

james potter: sirius james potter: oh dear brother of mine james potter: who is nothing but kind and supportive and never gives me shit for anything james potter: how are you this fine evening?

sirius black: spit it out

james potter: as you know, i have been pulled into the most hare-brained of schemes with none other than lily evans james potter: and it spiralled into remus taking a bunch of fake engagement photos for us this weekend

sirius black: i am well aware sirius black: you stole my boyfriend from me on what would have otherwise been a chill saturday morning and used him to take pictures in a fucking flower field

james potter: that is correct james potter: anyways james potter: it has come to my attention that we make a Very Cute Couple

sirius black: are u saying what i think ur saying

james potter: and now i feel weird because i kind of... wish they weren’t fake??

sirius black: u ARE saying it sirius black: oh my GOD sirius black: took you long enough

james potter: hey now, you agreed not to give me shit

sirius black: if you scroll up, you’ll see i never agreed to anything

james potter: i can’t believe you’re being so rude to me in my time of dire emotional distress

[Monday 16 May, 15:32]

remus lupin: heard you finally got your head out of your ass and admitted you like evans as more than a friend slash hookup

james potter: i’m going to kill sirius, he wasn’t supposed to tell anyone

remus lupin: he’d like you to know that he never agreed to that either remus lupin: but seriously, it was about time

james potter: :( stop making me feel like an idiot for having feelings

remus lupin: you’re not an idiot for having feelings remus lupin: you ARE an idiot for taking so long to realise you’ve had them

james potter: this is a new development james potter: i only had friendly feelings for her until yesterday

remus lupin: …… james remus lupin: you once woke up in the middle of the night to drive to that 24-hour ice cream shop on the other side of town at 3 a.m. so you could take lily her favourite milkshake while she was studying remus lupin: that is NOT something you do for someone you only have friendly feelings for

james potter: it isn’t???

remus lupin: would you do that for me or peter?

james potter: no

remus lupin: hence, not friendly feelings

james potter: … oh

remus lupin: you are useless remus lupin: absolutely useless remus lupin: truly do not know what lily sees in you

james potter: well that’s mean

[Monday 16 May, 16:53]

lily evans: is it sad that i keep forgetting this wedding website is fake?? lily evans: like, i am putting Way Too Much Effort into this given that it is an elaborate ruse to appease some librarians and i keep catching myself fantasising about a real wedding lily evans: literally what is wrong with me

remus lupin: jfc remus lupin: you two really ARE meant for each other

[Monday 16 May, 23:49]

james potter: wait what do you mean ‘what lily sees in me’?? james potter: remus?????

[Tuesday 17 May, 10:03]

lily evans: stage 2 of burn snape’s life to the ground begins tomorrow lily evans: are you ready?

james potter: should i be prepared for a fake marriage this time?

lily evans: haha no, i promise i won’t spring any fake relationship statuses on you this time lily evans: but now that you mention it… lily evans: check out this work of art lily evans: theknot . com / deerlybeloved

james potter: fucking hell, evans james potter: you went all out

lily evans: umm yeah lol lily evans: turns out designing a wedding website is a really fun way to procrastinate

[Tuesday 17 May, 10:16]

james potter: she used a deer pun in the fake wedding page name i actually can’t breathe

sirius black: the transition from complete denial to pathetic sod happened even faster than i expected

james potter: you are ruthless

sirius black: remember when i was the pathetic sod about remus and you gave me SO much shit about it?? sirius black: this is payback, bitchhhhhhh

james potter: you’re right, i deserve this

[Wednesday 18 May, 19:34]

james potter: truly, evans, i don’t understand why you’re studying chem when you’re this good at hacking into things james potter: in other news, i’m having the absolute fucking time of my LIFE on snape’s reddit account rn james potter: i just wrote a long essay about how i’ve learned the errors of my bigoted ways and am embracing the blm movement and intersectional feminism and i’ve never seen something get so violently downvoted so fast

lily evans: see, this is why i knew you were the right accomplice for this lily evans: keep destroying his internet reputation and trolling his weird alt-right community with all your research and logic lily evans: you’re doing amazing sweetie

james potter: studying human rights law does occasionally have its perks james potter: this, plus ya know the whole ‘making the world a better place’ thing

lily evans: i was about to say lily evans: i should hope the only perk isn’t trolling the internet

james potter: ahahahahah yessss one of the admins is threatening to kick me out james potter: also he keeps using mudblood as an insult and i’m like ??? james potter: what does that even mean??

lily evans: somehow i feel like you don’t want to know

james potter: update i found out, and yes you were right, i didn’t want to know

lily evans: in that case, not gonna ask

[Thursday 19 May, 17:35]

severus snape: Potter.

james potter: fuck i really thought i’d blocked your number

severus snape: You’ve pulled childish pranks in the past, but getting me banned from the Death Eaters Messageboard is a new low.

james potter: i’m sorry what james potter: i don’t know what you’re talking about

severus snape: Cut the bullshit. severus snape: In the process of reinstating my account - with none of my reputation points, might I add, thanks for that - I’ve acquired photo evidence of the posts that resulted in my expulsion. severus snape: I know no one else who would both make a play on words about deer and quote a Taylor Swift song in the same sentence. It was obviously you, you childish buffoon.

james potter: haters gonna hate, hate, hate, hate, hate

severus snape: I’m not joking around here.

james potter: baby i’m just gonna shake, shake, shake, shake, shake

severus snape: You’re going to regret this, mark my words.

james potter: i shake it off, i shake it off

james potter has blocked severus snape

[Thursday 19 May, 19:03]

lily evans: come over i’m bored

james potter: is this a ‘come over so we can have sex’ type of come over or a ‘come over so we can watch the good place for the hundredth time’ type of come over

lily evans: why does it have to be one or the other?

james potter: touché james potter: omw

[Thursday 19 May, 22:38]

james potter: RED ALERT I HAVE FUCKED UP james potter: you’re 1000% gonna roast me for this and i don’t fucking care because if i don’t tell someone i’m actually going to explode

sirius black: what happened with lily this time

james potter: bold of you to assume this has to do with lily

sirius black: does it have to do with lily?

james potter: ….. yes

sirius black: my bold assumption proven correct

james potter: anyways, we were shagging, as we do james potter: and it was the ~heat of the moment~, you know??

sirius black: i am not qualified to give you sex advice, if that’s where this is going

james potter: and i might’ve accidentally told her i loved her

sirius black: oh fuck that’s not where this was going

james potter: and now i don’t know what to doooooo

sirius black: well, what did you do after you said it?

james potter: honestly i blacked out james potter: i think i backtracked by telling her i meant that i love fucking her and then just like….. left as soon as we were done

sirius black: jesus fucking CHRIST

[Thursday 19 May, 22:54]

remus lupin: sirius is banging his head on the table repeatedly and given that he was texting you a few minutes ago i can only assume you said something on a whole new level of stupid

[Thursday 19 May, 23:01]

james potter: sirius??? james potter: help???

sirius black: i have never gone out on a date with a woman and even i can tell you that that is absolutely NOT what you do when you tell a girl you love them for the first time sirius black: you absolute knob

james potter: so what do i doooooo

sirius black: tell her the truth maybe? sirius black: the cat’s out of the bag now anyways and it’s not like you can make things any worse than you already have

james potter: but we agreed no one was going to catch feelings when we started sleeping together!! james potter: we pinky swore james potter: i can’t break a pinky swear

sirius black: ffs the fact that you two pinky swore on a sex agreement is something i’ll need to give you shit for at a totally separate time but that’s not the most pressing issue at the moment sirius black: my point stands, breaking a pinky swear is still an improvement on the current situation sirius black: just tell her the truth so you two can become that nauseatingly adorable couple and overtake me and remus as the most vomit-inducing pair in college

james potter: ughhhhh james potter: curse my blood-deprived brain for getting me into this mess

[Saturday 21 May, 9:37]

lily evans: phase 4 of fucking up snape’s life starts today - you ready?

james potter: uhhh yeah james potter: listen, are you okay?

lily evans: yes? why wouldn’t i be?

james potter: idk james potter: but good, that’s good

lily evans: yep, it’s good

james potter: how many phases are there to this snape plan anyways? james potter: will i get to know any of the phases in advance?

lily evans: 4 phases lily evans: phase 1 was putting the world back in its rightful order, phases 2-4 are all about destroying the things he holds most dear lily evans: see: his top 5 placement on that alt-right message board (phase 2), and his good reputation with all the chem professors (phase 3) lily evans: (i handled phase 3 on my own, btw)

james potter: fair enough, don’t know how i would’ve helped with chem professors anyways james potter: pretty sure one of them (slughorn i think?) hates me from that one time sirius and i let chickens loose in the science building

lily evans: oh god yeah he definitely probably does lily evans: anyways, phase 4 is sneaking into his room like he did to mine, and you’re gonna leave the note lily evans: he’ll be properly pissed off if he knows you got in, but he’d probably just wank to a note i left

james potter: thanks for the most cursed mental image of my life james potter: but you’re prob right tbh

lily evans: anyways, i’m pretty good at picking the locks on the dormitory windows, so i’ll go in that way and unlock his room from the inside - all you’ll need to do is show up lily evans: tonight at 7

james potter: roger that

[Saturday 21 May, 13:46]

remus lupin: have you talked to lily about the infamous mid-coital ‘i love you’ yet?

james potter: jfc must sirius tell you everything james potter: and no, i’m getting there i swear

remus lupin: get there faster

[Saturday 21 May, 22:40]

sirius black: is everything okay?? sirius black: actually wait i know the answer to that sirius black: you came in soaking wet two hours ago and grabbed the bottle of whiskey from the kitchen and have been blasting all too well at top volume ever since sirius black: everything is definitely not okay

james potter: fcuk lily evans james potter: and not in the fun way james potter: i’m never gonna fuck her in the fun way again

sirius black: what happened?

james potter: rememember how we were sabotaging snep’s life james potter: *sneep james potter: *snape james potter: turns out, she and sneep go way back james potter: motherfucker james potter: sneep is jsut his name now james potter: anyways, she set me up and betrayed me james potter: sneep knew i was gonna be there and put a booby trap on his door, and he and lily were inside LAUGHING at me

sirius black: wait what the fuck sirius black: lily would never

james potter: but she would apparently james potter: she even has pictures of them in primary school together james potter: i just james potter: fuck

sirius black: that’s actually beyond fucked up

james potter: originally this whole revenge on sneep thing was just me following along with lily’s rage james potter: but now it’s personal james potter: the lily revenge plan didn’t have a phase 5, but the james version does james potter: and i’m taking both of them dwon james potter: is it petty? yes james potter: will it actually fix th fact that evans betrayed me? no james potter: but will it make me feel better? yess james potter: and that, i think, is a valid reason james potter: will u hlep me??

sirius black: i mean, i’m always down to fuck with sneep sirius black: but uhh, maybe sleep off the alcohol first sirius black: and stop playing all too well

james potter: okye

sirius black: that was not an invitation to start playing you’re not sorry

james potter: taylor swift is th eonly person who gets my sadness right now i cant’ help it

[Sunday 22 May, 9:21]

lily evans: i called you like 5 times last night, why didn’t you pick up

james potter: i wasn’t aware you’d want to talk to me james potter: too busy hanging out with your bff sneep

lily evans: jfc you’re such a drama queen

james potter: excuse me

lily evans: also god no i’d never hang out with snape lily evans: sneep? lol

james potter: it was a typo that i’m making into an Official Thing james potter: you two seemed awfully cozy yesterday james potter: you know, when you betrayed me and led me straight into a trap

lily evans: ffs i didn’t betray you lily evans: if you would’ve picked up any of my calls last night, i would’ve been able to explain to you that this was all part of the plan

james potter: wait what

lily evans: i had to make you think i’d betrayed you because you can’t act for shit

james potter: why did you need me to think that

lily evans: for the real phase 4 lily evans: i’m destroying everything snape holds dear lily evans: which, yes, includes both his weird messageboard reputation and his teacher’s pet status, but you know what’s at the very top of that list? lily evans: his perpetual wank that i’m going to realise he was the perfect man for him all along lily evans: hence, i have lulled him into a false sense of believing his fantasy has finally come true so i can crush it under my heel once and for all

james potter: that is… downright diabolical

lily evans: i take revenge crusades very seriously

james potter: ok but how do i know you’re not double crossing me again?

lily evans: bc for fuck’s sake in what world would i EVER want to be with someone who treats me like a fucking prize that he’s owed for being nice to me as a kid?? lily evans: c’mon potter, you know me better than that

james potter: it felt SO REAL yesterday though

lily evans: that is because i, unlike you, am excellent at acting

james potter: why do you keep implying i’m a bad actor??

lily evans: because you are lily evans: exhibit a - you told me you loved me and then proceeded to full-on panic so hard that you gave the world’s worst cover up and ran away at the first possible moment

james potter: oh god, you noticed that

lily evans: of course i noticed that, because once again, you are the world’s worst actor

james potter: yikes james potter: i’m sorry, i know i managed to break literally the only rule we had going into this arrangement

lily evans: it’s actually kinda convenient, tbh lily evans: considering i broke it as well

james potter: you what

lily evans: as it happens, i have somewhat recently come to the realisation that my feelings for you are somewhat outside the bounds of what one would consider ~friendly~

james potter: was it the wedding website james potter: is that what did it

lily evans: embarrassingly enough…. yes

james potter: SAME

lily evans: wait seriously??

james potter: so serious i’m not even gonna make a sirius pun james potter: i mean, did you SEE how good we look together?? james potter: evans, we are a POWER COUPLE

lily evans: hell yes we are

james potter: a power couple who takes sneep down once and for all

lily evans: hell yes we are x100 lily evans: come over in a bit? gotta discuss the actual plan lily evans: i may have an idea that makes it even better

[Sunday 22 May, 10:21]

james potter: on second thought, plans have changed yet again

sirius black: i take it this is a positive change sirius black: given that you have now taken to blasting call it what you want

james potter: :)

[Sunday 22 May, 13:05]

james potter has unblocked severus snape

james potter: hey bro i just wanted to say i’m sorry for trying to sneak into your room

severus snape: You’re not my bro. Don’t call me that. severus snape: We both know you’re only apologising because you wanted to get into Lily’s pants.

james potter: not what this is about but go off i guess

severus snape: You’re just jealous because for once, the nice guy did get the girl. severus snape: Apology not accepted, by the way.

[Sunday 22 May, 13:13]

james potter: Attachment - 1 Screenshot james potter: at what point do i get to tell him i’ve actually been in your pants

lily evans: your time will come lily evans: but for now, stop texting sneep and put your phone down so that you can cuddle with your naked girlfriend who’s literally on the other side of the bed waiting for you

james potter: don’t have to ask me twice

[Sunday 22 May, 13:57]

lily evans: hey sev? wanna meet me at the founder’s garden this afternoon?

severus snape: Of course. Let’s do 4.

lily evans: looking forward to it xx

[Sunday 22 May, 18:59]

sirius black: heard sneep had a temper tantrum so dramatic half of the college overheard it

james potter: it was iconic

sirius black: also heard you and evans are engaged now???

james potter: ah, that part is just hearsay james potter: we decided to lean into the fact that we’ve already got a fake wedding website and just throw a fake proposal in there for good measure james potter: it’s still not an actual engagement james potter: but sneep doesn’t know that, and he never will

sirius black: that is so fantastically stupid, but then again, i don’t know why i’d expect anything less from you two at this point

james potter: i am going to buy her a less shitty ring though - not like an actual diamond one, but something in the middle ground, ya know? james potter: if she’s gonna wear it all the time it might as well be nice

[Sunday 22 May, 23:41]

severus snape: You are despicable. severus snape: You stole the girl who was clearly MINE. Lily loved ME first.

james potter: first of all, lily doesn’t belong to anyone james potter: second of all, she picked me

severus snape: And we all know you’re just going to drop her as soon as you get your dick wet.

james potter: not that our sex life is any of your business, but i can assure you that i have already disproven that theory

severus snape: That’s disgusting. I didn’t need to know that.

james potter: i mean, you’re the one who keeps bringing things back to getting into lily’s pants james potter: just wanted to share that the experience is indeed a pleasant one, 10/10 would recommend, not that you’ll ever get to experience it for yourself

severus snape: Fuck. You.

james potter: you know what i think, sneep?

severus snape: My name is Snape. Surely your pea brain can at least spell that properly.

james potter: i think you need to calm down james potter: you’re being too loud

james potter has blocked severus snape

[Monday 23 May, 12:54]

lily evans: fyi the uni library staff sent us one of those mini waffle makers as an engagement gift

james potter: oh my god james potter: best fake engagement ever

lily evans: figured you’d enjoy that

#jily fanfiction #jily fic #jily fanfic #jily #james potter #lily evans #james potter x lily evans #fluff #crackfic #i mean basically #chatfic #also fuck snape #kbyeeeee

18 notes · View notes

elm-lawrence · 3 years

Text

MUTANT: THE BEGINNING // Chapter One: The News

Stephanie stifled a yawn as a customer walked to her register. This was her first customer in hours which, she mused, was the side-effect of working at a twenty-four-hour corner shop. As she rung up the sale and exchanged pleasantries with the middle-aged women, she glanced at the clock and groaned inwardly when it only read 2:23am. Only an hour and a half left

she thought to herself in an effort to lift her own spirits, but only succeeded in driving them lower than they were before.

She handed the lady her change, bid her a good night and then watched her wander slowly out the door. A blast of chilled wind snuck its way into the shop, for the brief moment the door was open. Stephanie shivered, and tried not the think about her walk home. Having had enough of standing still, and seeing no more customers, she decided to go for a stroll around the isles. As she walked, she made mental notes of what needed restocking, all while very conscious of the fact she would never remember them all.

She heard movement behind her and turned. Jed, the only other staff member working this late on a Thursday, was struggling with a heavy box at the door to the stock room. She ran to help him.

“I’ve told you before, J, it’s bad for your back to lift these on your own!” Jed was a 40-something year old man with tanned skin, dark hair and the bushiest eye-brows Stephanie had ever seen. He had been off with a bad back no less than 6 months ago and had come back with strict instructions from his doctor to take it easy but seemed to take this more as a suggestion than an order.

“I’m fine, Steph! It’s not even that heavy!” He said, huffing slightly, once they’d set it down.

“Really? So, the hyperventilating is just, what, your normal reaction to movement?” She said, fixing him with her best withering stare. She got a playful glare in response.

“You ought to learn to respect your elders, young lady. You’re, what, 20? 21?”

“23.”

“23! That’s still a baby, if you ask me. Far too young to have such an attitude.”

“And you’re far too old to be lifting heavy boxes by yourself, clearly.” She teased back, enjoying the only source of entertainment she had.

“Why, you cheeky-” He cut himself off when the bell over the door rang out, signalling someone entering the shop.

“Go on, run along now.” He gestured at her dismissively as he pulled out his box cutter and began stocking cans onto the shelves beside him. She sighed and hurried back to her post, smiling as she passed the customer but got no acknowledgement in response. Stephanie frowned as she moved to her counter and continued to keep an eye on the man. He was around 25-ish, dressed in black jeans, a dark blue sweater and a grey beanie. He seemed dazed and unfocused as he searched the shelves. As she inspected him, she could see sweat on his skin despite the cool March night temperatures and the shops general lack of insulation. Stephanie almost classed him as suspicious but having worked the night shift so many times over her year and a half of employment, it took a lot more than knitted headwear and unseasonal sweat to peak her interested. Afterall, most who did their shopping at corner shops at 3am where not what one would consider ‘average.’

He approached the counter with a few bags of crisps, a fizzy drink and some painkillers. She rung him up, keeping an eye on his. For his part, his own eyes were rapidly darting back and forth, seemingly unable to focus on any one thing for more than a few seconds.

“That’ll be £5.40, please.” She said, watching him warily now. The neighbourhood the shop was based in had a bad reputation which, in her opinion, was not completely true, but the occasionally unsavoury character found their way through. The man did not seem to hear her, his eyes fixated now on something just over her left shoulder. She fought the urge to turn and remained her composure.

“Sir?” His eyes focused on her now, seeming to realise for the first time that she was there, waiting for his response.

“Huh?” He asked, and even from this she could tell he would slur his words if he was able for form any sort of coherent sentence.

“That will be £5.40, please.” She repeated, gesturing to the items on the counter.

“Oh! Yeah, yeah.” He reached into his pocket and pulled out a crumpled £10 note and dropped it on the counter. “Keep the change.” He said and gathered his things in his arms before unsteadily stumbled out into the street, the bell chiming his exit. Stephanie put the money in the till and glanced up as Jed walked over.

“He was a strange one.”

“Looked like he was high on something. And he got sweat on my counter.” She grimaced at the droplets and fished around under the desk for the disinfectant and cloth she kept there. She was no stranger to strange people, and she did not particularly mind most of them so long as they kept their strange off her counter.

“What time you here till?” Jed asked her as she swept the cloth over the counter.

“Four am, almost home time. You?” Jed scowled at the glass window looking out onto the dark empty streets, as if blaming his work life on the night-time sky.

“Six. Josh said he couldn’t start any earlier so Bossman's got me pulling his weight.” Stephanie shook her head.

“Typical.” She sighed.

The clock struck 4:00 as she clocked out, yelling her goodbye and good luck to Jed, she shrugged her coat on and shivered when she stepped into the cool night air. Stephanie lived relatively close to her work which, when her boss seemed to have sealed her fate to work until stupid hours of the morning until her death, was a blessing.

Pulling the coat tighter around her and shoving her hands in her pockets, she walked quickly through the streets, which already had the beginnings of a frost settling upon them. She turned the corner, sped up the streets and reached her apartment building in no more than ten minutes. She took her keys from her pocket, freezing night air immediately seizing her skin in its icy grip, unlocked the door, shut it heavily behind her and climbed the stairs to the fourth floor. She stopped outside apartment 130 and unlocked the door before hurrying inside.

Once safely inside her home, she shed her coat and jumper, cranked up the heating a tad, and sat heavily on her sofa with a sigh of relief.

“God this sofa has never felt so good,” she murmured, flicking the TV onto the late-night news channel. After allowing the news to sufficiently scare her about the current state of the world, Stephanie decided food would make her feel better again and muted the TV as she moved to her kitchen. Unfortunately, she discovered, for someone who worked somewhere people buy food from, she was horrendously understocked.

“What a terrible excuse for an adult I am.” She scolded herself, slipping some partially stale bread in the toaster and plunging it down as she rooted the butter out of the fridge. She quickly got changed, slipping her pyjama shorts on just as the toaster popped. She sat back down, having completed her gourmet meal, and glanced back at the TV. The presenter was the same as before; a middle-age white man with greying hair, slicked back to give the illusion of volume. This time, however, he looked worried. His eyes held uncertainty as they moved across the page, and his mouth was moving quickly. Stephanie frowned, then unmuted the TV while she ate and his words flooded the room, like a tidal wave of bad news.

“-urging people to stay in their homes. The illness seems to spread via contact with body fluids, however nothing is confirmed. As of yet, the illness seems to be confined to Russia, with their borders being shut down and any and all British personnel of importance transported via private airways back to the safety of the United Kingdom. These officials are being closely monitored and quarantined for clinical signs. Any updates will be broadcast as soon as we have them.” With that, the broadcast cut off abruptly and adverts began rolling across her screen.

Stephanie muted the TV again and sat back, crunching into her last slice of toast. Just then, a clattering from her bedroom, and movement towards her sofa.

“Bout time you woke up!” She called light-heartedly, as her Siamese cat hopped up onto the back of her sofa, mewing and purring. She moved the plate on her lap to the coffee table and picked him up, cuddling him into her body.

“Good morning handsome boy, I take it you enjoyed your time alone? No parties while I was gone?” Her purred in response, rubbing up against her. Technically speaking, Sye was not her cat per say, rather one that seemed to invade her home every few days for a nap while she was at work. Stephanie assumed he lived somewhere in the building, probably a loud apartment with annoying kids, and her bed was more his nap pad than anything else. When she first saw him in the halls, he’d followed her back to her flat and even since then Sye would show up, completely randomly and out-of-the-blue like the terrible house guest he was.

“You hungry?” She asked him, and he meowed loudly at her, jumping onto the arm of the chair and flicking his tail.

“An enthusiastic yes, then!” She pushed herself up, shoved some cat food onto a plate and put it on the kitchen floor. While Sye inhaled his food, she went to her bedroom and flicked the lights on, sighing at the phone charger that was now on the floor.

“I invite you into my home, feed you, keep you warm, let you nap… and this is how you repay me?” She muttered, picking it up and placing it back on her nightstand. “Typical.”

She grabbed her laptop, plopped down on her bed and opened it up. She noted dully that it was nearly 5am.

As she settled into her nightly routine of aimless scrolling, she heard a loud meow followed by the faint sounds of claws on her rug.

“Hey!” She yelled as she cast her laptop aside and ran to her front door. “We will have none of that in this home, sir.” She scolded Sye, as he sat down in front of her doors, eyes wide and expecting.

“I do hope you behave better for your real family. Go on, shoo.” She opened her door and he meowed once before strolling slowing down the hallway towards the stairs. Shaking her head, she flicked the sound back up on the TV.

“A press release from Government officials has been released.” Stated the white-haired news caster. “Much like earlier, people are being urged to stay in their homes, however those in the centre of heavily populated areas are being urged to find refuge in less densely populated areas if it is safe to do so. Public transport may be affected. It has been released that this new pandemic can turn people violent. There have been reports of random attacks on strangers, wives attacking husbands, even children attacking parents. I will reiterate at this point to stay inside. The virus is spread through contact with those already infected. Research into this new virus is being conducted, but due to the large number of people reporting symptoms the work is moving slowly. Please, if anyone near you is presenting symptoms, restrain them for their own safety, until medical officials can reach you. Do not take them to the hospitals yourself, for your own safety. Be safe.”

And with that, the broadcaster disappeared off screen and was replaced not by the usual music, by but a black screen. Stephanie stood still, staring at the dark TV screen, giving herself a few more moments to properly absorb the story.

Suddenly, from outside there came the sound of squealing tires and metal scraping.

She ran to the window, broken from her fear by the thundering noise, peering outside into the streets. This early in the morning, the run-down area was relatively quiet, with the occasional noise of traffic from the nearby main roads. With the sun rising over the city, casting it in an eerie early morning shadow, Stephanie saw a car on the pavement, a lamppost bent over the dented bonnet. She watched for any movement, reaching blindly for her phone to dial for an ambulance, when someone stepped out from the wreckage.

As she called for an ambulance, someone emerged from the building opposite hers, rushing towards the accident. The driver was leaning against their car, head slumped with a hand over their chest. The concerned stranger reached them, reached out a hand, before the driver’s head snapped up. Stephanie could not see the expression on either face from her vantage point, however she got a bad feeling about the exchange by the way the stranger froze a few feet from the driver. She fought the irrational urge to go outside and see if he was okay.

The phone was still ringing. She had been so wrapped up in watching the scene unfold she’d forgotten she was calling the ambulance. Why was it still ringing? She’d dialled minutes ago, how long did the emergency services take to answer the phone?

Then the ringing stopped, and she took her eyes off the scene before her to frown at her phone, checking if she still had power. She did. The call had dropped, her signal had dropped. She heard a scream and looked back to see the driver running after the stranger, arms outstretched and movements wild like a starved predator. Even from her room, she heard his growling, like a rabid animal. Eyes wide, heart racing, she drew the curtains.

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