#[ y e a h he does need a date tho 8) ]

[despairforme]

He's swiping right on literally everyone now. Fuck it. He's gonna find a date.

#[ nnoitra you already had no standards LOL ] #[ y e a h he does need a date tho 8) ] #[ man oh man i actually managed to sleep despite my cough ] #[ probably because i went to bed at like 7 lmao ] #[ today i'm gonna drink a ton of water to heal myself ] #[ AND WORK ON DRAFTS ] #[ thank you so much to everyone who sends me asks t-t i'm very spoiled ] #[ just gotta focus on drafts now bc people have been so patient and they deserve to have replies to our threads!! ] #[ cannot get over how kind everyone is to me hhhhhhhh ] #[ will work hard!! ] #despair for me. ╱ in character. #burn the city. ╱ main verse. #[ hope you're all doing goood! ]

[robinofinashiro]

request from anon: “Hi, can I request yandere alphabet for Kyojuro Rengoku 👉👈Thank you and have a good day Queen.”

pairing: yandere! kyojuro rengoku x fem reader

request status: OPENED

A - Affection: How do they show their love and affection? How intense would it get?

rengoku does not give a singular fuck who sees him when it comes to giving you affection! you’re in the public? you’ll be holding his hand, kissing your cheek when he feels like it, and if it’s that bad, he’ll do a quickie in the bathroom. 

B - Blood: How messy are they willing to get when it comes to their darling?

very messy! he doesn’t care. if he sees someone getting too close to you, he’ll make sure to get rid of them as soon as possible. he can’t let anyone get close to you. he’ll go to the ends of the earth to make sure that you’re by his side and that no one comes in between the two of you. 

C - Cruelty: How would they treat their darling once abducted? Would they mock them?

honestly, he’ll mock the hell out of them when he feels like it’s necessary. if you’re purposely doing things to annoy him or going out of your way to piss him off, he’ll make sure to remind you that you’re never leaving him. other than that, he’ll treat you like you’re a princess! you deserve everything in the world and he’ll give it to you if he feels like you deserve it. 

D - Darling: Aside from abduction, would they do anything against their darling’s will?

despite from the sweet nature that he gives off, he will do ONE thing against your will and that’s to have kids. he needs to continue his family line and since Senjuro isn’t working to be a pillar anymore, he needs to make sure that someone continues that and it might have to be his kid. 

E - Exposed: How much of their heart do they bare to their darling? How vulnerable are they when it comes to their darling?

rengoku, when he feels like the time is right, will bare everything to his darling. come on now, you’re gonna be his wife, right? it’s only right that you know what his baggage is! he doesn’t care if you judge him or not, when it comes to this sort of thing, he kinda wears his heart on his sleeve. 

F - Fight: How would they feel if their darling fought back?

he would be kinda pissed. you’re supposed to be this perfect wife/darling and by you acting out, he doesn’t sit well with that. why can’t you be more like Sanemi’s wife? a perfect little darling that just sits there and waits for her husband like she should. punishment is a whole other ballgame that i will touch on later. 

G - Game: Is this a game to them? How much would they enjoy watching their darling try to escape?

absolutely tf not. how can this be a game to someone? rengoku is the kinda person where if he meets someone that he falls madly in love with, he’ll stick by you until one of you dies first and even then, he might commit sewerslide if you happen to be the one to go first. however, he might get a kick watching you trying to leave him bc it’s nearly impossible to leave where you’re trapped.

H - Hell: What would be their darling’s worst experience with them?

rengoku’s affection, jesus christ. that shit could get mad annoying. if he’s had a particularly bad day, just brace yourself and let it happen bc he will be one affectionate mf. it could get to the point where he’ll be affection even into the next day if it’s that bad. 

I - Ideals: What kind of future do they have in mind for/with their darling?

literally a picture perfect life. (very much the american dream in a sense). he wants kids, hell, if you want pets of some sort, he’s down to adopt a few dogs or whatever you or your kids want. he just wants everyone to see that his family is perfect and how far he’s willing to go for them. 

J - Jealousy: Do they get jealous? Do they lash out or find a way to cope?

oh absolutely. rengoku is the type of mf that if he sees someone flirting with his darling, he’s ending that shit QUICK. he cannot and will not let it happen. clearly it isn’t your fault so he’ll console you that you had no way of knowing what that scums intentions were and after he’s done with that, he’ll try to find the person to give them a lesson. 

K - Kisses: How do they act around or with their darling

he will be very clingy like i said. he wants everyone to know that his relationship is perfect but in private, double that. he’ll make sure that you know you’re loved and that he wouldn’t trade his life with you for anything in the world. 

L - Love letters: How would they go about courting or approaching their darling?

he would try the attempt to court you at first. rengoku is someone who is very charming so 8/10 times, it’ll work. however, if you’re being stubborn, that’s when the other side of rengoku comes out. but if you do decide to date him willingly, he’s the sweetest mf ever. he’ll bring you courting gives to every date, etc, etc. 

M - Mask: Are their true colors drastically different from the way they act around everyone else?

honestly, rengoku is seen as the black sheep in the sense that he’s always readily happy and enthusiastic. not much changes when he’s in the public. unless you happen to piss him off in public, seemingly the only time when he would change his personality. 

N - Naughty: How would they punish their darling?

he doesn’t try to do it often, he hates seeing you hurt. but if you happen to actually piss him off to the point where you need to be punished, anything ranging from being alone for days to sexual punishment (that i wont be going into detail for).

O - Oppression: How many rights would they take away from their darling?

not many tbh. you have free range into his entire estate. however if he has maids working around, they know it’s best for them not to talk to you. he wont let you leave his estate to speak to anyone. you have the right to anything as long as you’re not trying to leave or get into contact with someone. he’ll even let you visit your friends or family as long as he’s there. 

P - Patience: How patient are they with their darling?

eh, he’s about 50/50. he can be very patient with you or be ticked off almost immediately. more than likely tho, he’ll deal with your shit most days. the days that he doesn’t, it’s probably bc he had already probably had a bad day and you’re just making shit worse. 

Q - Quit: If their darling dies, leaves, or successfully escapes, would they ever be able to move on?

if you die, rengoku won’t move on and like i said before, he’d probably commit sleep forever. if you escape, he’ll spend the rest of his days looking for you. regardless if you escape or die, he won’t move on. you’re his and you will remain that way important person in his life. 

R - Regret: Would they ever feel guilty about abducting their darling? Would they ever let their darling go?

to a certain point, he’d feel guilty. i think the only thing eating him up is the unethical part in all of this. the fact that he’s basically abducted you and refuses to let you go. but will he ever let you go? absolutely not. you’d have to kill him before that happens. 

S - Stigma: What brought about this side of them (childhood, curiosity, etc)?

i see the only way this happening is bc of his life. his childhood wasn’t the greatest but it wasn’t exactly the worst so idk, i think more than anything it was out of curiosity and probably seeing others do it that make him snap. 

T - Tears: How do they feel about seeing their darling scream, cry, and/or isolate themselves?

if rengoku isn’t at fault for making you upset, he’s HEARTBROKEN. he doesn’t like seeing you that way and he’ll find the person that did it and make them pay for it. HOWEVER, if he was the cause of it, he almost turns into a wall and brushes it off, probably murmuring that you deserved whatever it is that made you cry. 

U -Unique: Would they do anything different from the classic yandere?

honestly no. he wouldn’t only bc he’s very much the person that finds the classics of being a yandere as the only way to do it. anything like killing your darling or along those lines are way to extreme for him and he doesn’t like it when others step out of line. 

V - Vice: What weakness can their darling exploit in order to escape?

SENJURO RENGOKU. his little brother is also his world and i think if you catch kyojuro in a situation where you can exploit senjuro, he might give in but honestly, it probably won’t hurt and it’ll be worse for you when he finally has you alone. 

W - Wit’s end: Would they ever hurt their darling?

like i said before, only if it was necessary. he wouldn’t ever intentionally hurt you if you didn’t deserve it. he doesn’t like seeing you hurt and he hates seeing you cry so only if it came to you being a brat would he then actively physically punish you. 

X - Xoanon: How much would they revere or worship their darling? To what length would they go to win their darling over?

ehhhhhh, not really. he sees this relationship as 50/50 however he did kinda worship you when he wasn’t your boyfriend/husband but he would go different lengths in order to win you over. he doesn’t really care what he has to do, he will make you his whether you like it or not. 

Y - Yearn: How long do they pine after their darling before they snap?

tbh, it doesn’t take long before he snaps. if he sees you going out with someone and he feels like you might leave him, that’ll be a point. if he sees you being too free, that might be another point. in general, less than a year before he snaps. hell, less than half a year. 

Z - Zenith: Would they ever break their darling?

mentally, YES! physically, if he needed to. but not to the point where he’s killed you. 

#yandere demon slayer #yandere kimetsu no yaiba #kny #demon slayer #demon slayer imagine #demon slayer x reader #Kimetsu no Yaiba #kimetsu no yaiba x reader #kimetsu no yaiba imagine #rengoku kyojuro x reader #kyojuro rengoku #kyojuro rengoku imagine #yandere kyojuro rengoku

[worminstuff]

IM BORED. TBOTT HEADCANONS.

random obscure headcanons for the boys we all miss most- the tbott family.

warnings: pure family content. (there’s no tws)

word count: i don’t know i’m not even putting my auto caps on.

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

dadza!

oh father phil, how we have missed you.

this man folds his socks.

drinks black coffee, but when wilburs making iced coffees and stuff, he always asks for one.

when techno was about 9 and said he wanted to learn how to ride a bike finally, phil was ecstatic. he was super excited but since techno is techno, he didn’t need phil’s help at all really. phil watched like a soccer mom while 9 year old techno taught himself how to ride a bike.

phil h a t e s mustard. tommy puts it in his burger when he’s not looking.

phil gets very worried when his kids get quiet. besides techno. but the other three- he gets reaalllll worried.

he once ate an entire apple, core and all, to prove a point to tommy. 4 year old tommy. he cried.

phil then acted pregnant for a week saying he was gonna have an apple baby. tommy hates apples now.

phil did feel bad after he realized what trauma he caused-

phil tries to give techno dating advice for y/n but techno always brings up the “but you’re single. and you’ve been single-“ every time. phil then mocks him like a child. techno finds it hilarious. (which is secretly why phil does it)

wil to the bur

he smokes cigarettes because they help him calm down, and he thinks the smell is actually nice.

he sleeps with like 8 blankets on his bed.

when he and techno where much younger, he used to sleep in technos bed with him. phil thought it was because techno had a nightmare or something but wilbur or techno never told him it was cause wilbur gets lonely at night.

wilbur = party animal

wilbur brought y/n to her first party, and it was bonkers. he has polaroids of them from that night that he keeps in his wallet.

wilbur takes tommy on “brother days” where they go on adventures and tommy picks where they go. wilburs favorite was when they played hide and seek in a target. he surprisingly didn’t loose tommy.

wilbur bakes when he’s stressed. that’s why tommy always has cookies in his school lunch bags.

when wilbur wanted to move out, y/n offered her house since no one really lives there but her parents still payed for it. and he was still close to home but with the independency he wanted. he didn’t take her up on it until a month after she offered.

wilbur doesn’t enjoy receiving gifts as much as he prefers to give.

wilbur got into a college near by, but tommy didn’t understand that it ment he would be staying home for school so he freaked. wilbur actually ended up spending the night in his room after explaining he wasn’t leaving his little bro.

wilbur did shit his pants in a park out of fear one time. he was 4. phil has a picture of him crying on the car ride home with no pants on and clean underwear. it’s in both their wallets.

satan spaw- tommy.

tommy had separation anxiety as a baby.

tommys favorite person is y/n because she’s the only mother ish figure he ever had growing up, and that resonated with him more than he could understand.

one time when tommy was about 8 he snuck over to y/n’s house because she wasn’t staying at theirs and he was scared something was gonna happen to her. he scared the shit out of her but she let him stay the night and brought him back early so phil wasn’t scared.

tommy bit a dog once.

tommy once tried to slap a bug out of tubbos hand and “accidentally” slapped him across the face. tubbo then ate an apple i front of him.

tommy cried.

tommys first girlfriends name was elle, she was a sweety. funnily enough tho, when she came over to hangout with tommy she met techno. apparently, she was quite fond of techno. the relationship was short.

tommy hates lady bugs.

tommy had velcro shoes till he was 10.

when tommy got much much older, he gave y/n a similar ring to the one he swallowed as a christmas present. she cried, which made him cry, and then phil cried, and then techno and wilbur laughed at them all.

tommy actually gave y/n a mother’s day card as a joke when he was like 17 but y/n cried and he gave her a big hug and she told him how proud of him she was and how lucky she felt to be a very loose version of a mom/big sister to him.

pink hair boy

y/n once told him he smelled bad and he didn’t talk to her for 48 hours.

techno and y/n started staying at her house once phil allowed them when they turned 18 and techno loved bonk (y/ns cat)

him and the cat were besties. bonk would sit on his shoulders.

techno holds y/ns pinky sometimes when he’s doing something but wants to sorta hold her hand.

techno likes to help y/n pick outfits, not in a controlling you can’t wear this cause to much skin, he just likes to make her try on a bunch of things.

techno had 3 favorite hoodies, one is one of phil’s old ones, one is from will, and the last he bought himself but tommy wears it often.

techno bakes with wilbur late at night sometimes.

technos fondest memory as a child was when y/n made him a book. it was a story about a rabbit, and he still has it on his bookcase.

after will graduated college and moved out of y/ns house and the sleepy house fully and got his own, techno and y/n actually moved in to her house.

they decorated it, and even painted it new. y/n was really greatful he let her stay in her childhood home.

but techno didn’t tell her it was because he was scared of moving away from tommy, and the treehouse too. he never wanted to not be able to have moments with her in the treehouse.

techno and bo became amazing friends and even ended up going to the same college. it was a community college but- yk-

#tbott #techno fanfic #technoblade fanfic #technoblade fanfiction #techno x reader #technoblade #wilbur soot #wilbur mcyt #wilbursootfluff #wilbur soot x reader #philza #tommyinnit #baby tommyinnit #sleepy bois x reader au #sleepy bois x reader #sleepy bois inc #sleepy bois fanfic #sleepy boys inc #sleepy bois au

[chuuyasknife]

random relationship hcs to start my acc :) (slight nsfw) dazai, chuuya, and aku

。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。

dazai osamu

he would probably be really nervous about messing it up

but after awhile he’ll probably be really clingy

big spoon !!

loves soft dates like picnics or stargazing

would def die from happiness if you made him a playlist

would literally tell EVERYONE about you in a 50 min radius

even tho he hates to admit it he loves you playing with his hair

like if he’s ever stressed out about work or something just play with his hair

will do anything to make you happy

if your ever upset, call him and he’ll literally be there asap

he gives really good hugs 🥺🥺

likes to hold hands 25/8

i feel like he would have a godly voice so he sings you asleep !!

switch

likes teasing you (in more ways then one 😏)

calls you love, or like a random nickname he gave you

loves hugging you from behind

it makes you blush and he thinks it’s so cute

your his reason to live and he's not afraid to tell you

you always make sure he’s ok mentally and isnt overworking himself

he makes your your ok in return

if something is wrong then he’ll let you rant and tries to give you advice

will just hold you if you need him too

your like the only person he atually opens up too

chuuya nakahara

probably flirted with you by buying you expensive wine

not really into pa but when you guys are alone 😳

he’ll probably shower you in kisses

thinks consent is sexy (it is 🥵)

he’s a switch

he’s literally the best person to vent too

he may not know how to help you but he’ll definitely try

and if theres nothing he can do then he’ll just hold you

you guys probably have a fish or something

if you both work in the pm then he never lets you go on dangerous missions by yourself

like if he can’t go with you then he’ll send some of his subordinates to watch over you

if something does happen to you then he’ll kill everyone 😃

probably gets mad at you for almost dying even tho it’s not your fault

but then after he always feels bad and gives you whatever you want

you’ve gotten used to his fits and helps him calm down after

he always feels bad when he yells at you

he most likely wouldn’t keep his job secret because he takes great pride in it

you probably never would have thought he could have the job he does

probably has a knife kink

and if you do too??

your literally the one

he probably doesn’t really care about marriage but if your into it?

you’ll have a HUGE wedding cus this bitch is loaded

he’d probably invite dazai and most of the pm

if your family comes then you’ll both make up a whole story to cover up what he (or both of you) really do

the honeymoon doe 🥵✋

prepare to not walk for a couple days 😃👍

akutagawa ryuunosuke

i literally love this scene sm-

anyways

he was probably completely oblivious to your feelings at first

but when you told him straight up he was like “oh….why”

after you convinced him that your weren’t trying to take advantage of him or anything you too started dating

it took him awhile to get used to you touching him (like hugs and stuff like that)

but when he did he’ll never let go of your hand

like he gets anxious if your not holding his hand

probably has attachment issues and needs a lot of reassurance that your not gonna leave him

he’s really soft :,)

like chuuya he makes sure your save at all times

but if you have an ability then he trust that you’ll be ok

he probably has a praise kink

and gets really flustered with you compliment him

but don’t let that fool you, he’s definitely a top

probably draws blood when he kisses you

that’s hot sorry i-

if you ever upset he’d probably freeze up not knowing what to do

but after he thinks about it he lets you know he’s there for you

he’s the best person to vent or rant to

he’d just give you kisses and hugs, along with some advice if your want it

if not then he’ll just cradle you

when his coughing gets bad you’ll try to help him by calming him down and giving him his meds

if it gets bad enough, you call the pm for help

you make sure he takes a few days off even if he doesn’t want to

you try to put away some time for you two to have self care time

you have your own apartment but basically live with him and gin

HIS WHOLE APARTMENT IS FILLED WITH PLANTS

PLANTS E V E R Y W H E R E

it’s honestly so cute

he also has an aquarium with cool bugs

and a butterfly garden

and an ant farm

just a lot of bugs and plants

he even named them all

probably likes frogs too

oh and you both take days off to go to tea houses that have cool trinkets and stuff

。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。

#anime #bungou stray dogs #dazai osamu #bungo stray dogs headcanons #dazai headcanons #chuuya nakahara #chuuya headcanons #akutagawa #bsd #bsd x reader #if this looks bad i'm sorry- #fanfic #slight smut #kinky lol #Spotify

[guqin-and-flute]

Cave Adventures: I’m Pretty Sure They Just Got Married [Episode 6]

[TRANSCRIPT BELOW]

(1)

WWX: AAAAAH FUCK

(2) WWX: PJJAISDFJASOA ah jeez it's up my n O S E how does ariel make this look good?

(3) LWJ: oh no it's just him and me AND THE GAY THOUGHTS u can't run from gay thoughts in an enclosed space wangji u IDIOT

WWX: oh fuck it's really up in there all up in my brain-case that's cold as shit my brain is a fucking slushie rn

(4) WWX: kind of a weird place for a first date

LWJ: shut up

WWX: i guess it's nice that it's sparkly did u decorate it urself

LWJ: shut UP

WWX: sort of an obscure wet t-shirt contest, huh

LWJ:[slightly overrunning end of sentence] SHUT UP

(5) Fancy qin: hey mtv and welcome to my crib

LWJ: it's very uhhh...wet

(6) LWJ: oh thank god a distraction

WWX: lan zhan hold me i'm cold and vulnerable and stuff i'm shivering invitingly and everything

LWJ: i can't i lost my...hands shit

WWX: ...this is lame :(

(7) WWX: lan zhaaaaaaaaaaaan why are u ignoring meeeee stringed instruments are NOT more interesting than my whiniiiiing on a more serious note, i cannot feel my feet

LWJ: are u a magical wish granting zither if so pls help i am running from gay thoughts their name is wei ying

Fancy qin: lol

(8) WWX: here i come! devastatingly cute delightfully disheveled devilishly moist (?) boop de doop S U B M IT  T O  M Y  C H A R M  D A M M I T

(9) Fancy qin: N O P E begone THOT

(10) WWX: #casual drowning

(11)

LWJ: ngl that was some funny shit i think u actually made me grow a sense of humor just by eating shit so hard just now congrats thanks zither

Fancy qin: ur welcome

LWJ: dammit he's even hot when he's drowning fuck let the exertion of repression of your extremities

(12) WWX: FULL OFFENSE UR STRING THING SUCKS ASS THIS DATE IS TERRIBLE

LWJ: not a date not my string thing i fully support its choices tho also shut up

WWX: fuck u man

Fancy qin: u sure about that wangji

(13) Fancy qin: kiss_the_girl.mp3 volume: 100% bass: +10

(14)

WWX: oh sweet, that means i AM ariel

LWJ: dammit magical wish granting zither i thought  u were on my side turns out u had an agenda all along a gay one what am i supposed to do, tell him how i FEEL? repression is one of the 3,500 gusulan rules it's why our cultivation is so powerful

(15) WWX: oh hey look rabbits

LWJ: what the fuck

Rabbits: we're rabbits!

LWJ: yeah no i get that but w h y

Rabbits: well ur gonna need witnesses for ur wedding, right?

why...are we rabbits?

what are u asking

(16) WWX: damn this is a weird proposal but i am INTO IT a marriage??? for me????

(17)

LWJ: UGH. FINE.

WWX: yaaaay! :D

(18) Headband: fwip fwap fwoop

WWX: Pikachu i choose u

LWJ: those are ur VOWS??

WWX: yeah what are urs?

LWJ: i vow to never let u fall off any cliffs even if u want to

WWX: that's weirdly specific

(19) LWJ: THERE. HAPPY?

WWX: ye :)

LWJ: yeah me too actually fuck

LWJ's hand: hand clench of questionable repression

(20) LWJ: gotta go pay our respects to the magical wish granting zither granting wishes i didn't even know i had or was maybe desperately trying to run from who knows it's a mystery

WWX: eeeeeeee eeeeeeee it's so pretty look at it eeeeeee eeeeeee

(21)

LWJ: oh random cave zither thank u for opening my eyes my heart and my wallet to this man beside me

Fancy zither: ur welcome bb

WWX: i mean...i take more credit for being tenaciously persistent but

LWJ: u mean obscenely annoying

WWX: potato, tomato oh sweet what does THIS button do?

(22) LWJ: u stop that retract thine hand, wretch

WWX: what an incredibly phallic way to stop me, honey

(23) WWX: fuckin rude

LWJ: magical. wish granting. zither. old as balls. clan heirloom. touch not

WWX: well i'm clan now so the rabbits said

(24) WWX: ok i won't touch it... i'll just TOUCH IT

LWJ: LITERALLY STOP WHAT IS WRONG WITH U we've been married for 17 seconds and i already want to tie u up and not for the right reasons no fuckin touchy, bro

(25)

LWJ: I ' M gonna touch it

WWX: how is that fair

LWJ: complain to hr

WWX: of marriage??? i'm telling ur brother ur being mean to me

(26) LWJ: OH HOLY SHIIIIIT

(27) WWX: what did u experience?

LWJ: seagulls.

WWX: that's...weird. is this something that happens...regularly?

LWJ: yeah wei ying i regularly have bird related hallucinations i'm not huaisang

(28) Walls: rah rah rah we are the walls of expositional historical murder!

LWJ: OH GOD NOW THE WALLS ARE SHOUTING pls tell me u hear that too

WWX: holy shit this is a weird date

(29) Lan Yi: yeah, i can hear it

(30) WWX: what in the freezer burned HELL

LWJ: did that zither just...talk?

WWX: no it's a random lady

LWJ: that's WEIRDER

(31) Lan Yi: hiii i'm your semi dead ex clan leader and these rabbits are my roommates i gave them little headbands aren't they cute? pls help i'm so lonely

Rabbit: rude

(32) WWX: this is fucking wild is this where all the ladies are? u guys keep them in caves? that doesn't seem very ethical

LWJ: well when we leave them out in the open, the plot gets them and they die

(33) Lan Yi: u guys are cute weird choice for a honeymoon, tho

WWX: first date too, actually if u don't count illicit dueling

LWJ: yeah the lava pits at the nightless city cancelled our reservation so

Lan Yi: hate it when that happens

(34) Lan Yi: anyway, i became all corporeal and shit to show u this this rock is evil as fuck. it didn't used to be but now it is and that's a problem for everyone who likes living including rabbits

LWJ: shit we gotta save the rabbits wei ying

WWX: well and everyone else, right? ...lan zhan everyone else too, right??

(35) WWX: listen what if we got it some therapy rock therapy some good ol' geological counseling like showed it that it could change and be a good rock again or at least an okay rock

(36) LWJ: ...ok i know i vowed to support u

WWX: u actually said something ominous about cliffs but ok

LWJ: but i literally think u gave me an aneurysm just then that's the stupidest thing i've ever heard anyone--

(37) Lan Yi: funny u should mention that actually i had the same thought

LWJ: ...my god

(38) WWX: cool!

Lan Yi: it ended with me spitting up blood and living as a semi-corporeal crazy rabbit lady without my wife she got the mountain in the divorce

WWX: oh...so no?

Lan Yi: yeah, no

LWJ: YEAH NO

(39) Lan Yi: u should deffo go find the rest they start acting real fucked up around each other might feel like a heart attack might BE a heart attack idk just wander around a bit u'll get there

(40) WWX: ...cool

LWJ: what in the hell sort of directions are those

(41) Lan Yi: yep! well anyway, now seems a good a time as any to evaporate so i think i'll just...do that don't forget to feed my rabbits or i'll leave u a 1 star review on ghost yelp

(42) WWX/LWJ: MA'AM?? MA'AM? ? U DIDN'T TELL US WHERE WE'RE GOING ISN'T THAT STANDARD QUESTING MATERIAL?? PLS RESPOND

Lan Yi: nope. git gud have fun with ur new evil rock congrats on ur marriage

BONUS WUXIAN:

[here are more irreverently summarized scene bits]

#back at it again with a scene NO ONE REQUESTED 👌👌👌 (oops) #Literally just spurred from Wangji's 'wtf are you doing' face when Wuxian tries to touch the qin a second time #brief summary #my stuff #hey this is the first one I DIDN'T finish at 4 am go me #cql crack #untamed crack #I HAVE UPDATED THE TRANSCRIPT WITH THE NEW FORMAT

[starryyastraea]

SHIP/OTP Questions for my main ships: Cambeck, Lunarie, and Camarie :) (because I am not sure which ships will end up canon y a y)

1. Who is the early bird/ Who is the night owl?

Valerie is definitely the night owl in every situation. She cannot fall asleep before 11pm, but even then likes to stay up. What do you expect? This girl stays up studying fairy tales and magic and then of course has to do all her school work at 1am. She’s a wreck.

Luna and Camden are early birds, and go to bed early. Do not understand Val’s need to stay up. Luna likes to get up early to work out and get ready for her day. She likes to be productive. Cam likes to watch the sunrise and gets inspiration from the early morning crap idk. He likes to be up and awake and ready. They both like to be awake before everyone else in the house and have alone time before they need to put on their ‘masks’.

Oliver is both? He likes to stay up late but can’t sleep in. So when he can, he naps during the day. Which he can’t. Get this poor boy some sleep, he's a mess. 

2. Who is the big spoon/ Who is the little spoon?

Cam is usually the big spoon and Val is the little spoon. He likes holding her and feeling like he can protect her, and vice versa. But sometimes, when Cam has had a bad day, he needs to be held. Val likes when she’s the big spoon because it’s when Cam is vulnerable idk words lol

Same thing here. Cam is usually the big spoon. Oliver would never initiate himself as the big spoon, but he wouldn’t turn Cam down if he wanted to be held.

LUNA IS A LITTLE SPOON LUNA IS A LITTLE SPOON SHE NEEDS TO BE HELD AND CUDDLED SHE IS A  B A B Y  HAH LITTLE BABY

3. Who hogs the cover/ Who loves to cuddle?

Okay so hear me out. They ALL love to cuddle. The most affectionate are Camden and Luna, then Valerie and then Oliver.

Val is a total cover hog, which is fine because Cam and Luna will just cuddle up to her and boom all is good.

Oliver. Will. Steal the covers. And when he’s sleeping he doesn’t care to cuddle. So Camden is lEFT FREEZING HIS LIL FACE OFF AND OLIVER DOESN’T KNOW NOR CARE BECAUSE HE’S ASLEEP

4. Who wakes the other one up with kisses?

Camden. Little kisses all over the face. With Val she’ll smile and return them, Oli will end up a blushing mess every single time.

If Val happens to somehow be awake before Luna? Like they both had a long night?? OOooffff. Luna is definitely that “Affection? Disgusting… Do it again” type of person so if Valerie ever woke Luna up with little kisses Luna would ACT like she hated them but they both know that's how she wants to be woken up for the rest of her life. Might do that to Valerie a few times and then deNY IT THE BRAT

5. Who usually has nightmares?

Honestly? Probably Luna. Her constant fear of wanting affection and attention keeps her up at night (Except not)

6. Who would have really deep emotional thoughts at the middle of the night/ Who would have them in the middle of the day?

B R U H. Valerie and Oliver would stay up late at night contemplating life and Camden would totally go along with it. 

Luna does her thinking during the day around people. That's how she realized she liked females and maybe being popular wasn’t really everything and woah no one has ever been inside and empty room….

7. Who sweats the small stuff?

Luna and Oliver when it comes to basic everyday things. They are worry warts, no matter how much they hide it. So poor Val and Cam need to tell them they’re doing okay and just. S t o p.

Cam sweats the small stuff when it comes to his partner. He’s a hopeless romantic and just wants his s/o to feel like the most loved and happy person in the world and constantly feels like he isn’t doing enough.

8. Who sleeps in their underwear (or naked)/ Who sleeps in their pajamas?

They all wear pajamas but if Valerie were alone on a hot night she would not pass up just her underwear and a giant t-shirt.

9. Who makes the coffee (or tea)?

Cam and Luna usually do since they wake up early, but Valerie always makes extra because she's a thirsty gal

10. Who likes sweet/ Who likes sour?

Cam and Oli are wholesome sweetie babies who love sweet.

Valerie likes both. She can’t choose just oNE …. :)

Luna likes sour things. Sour. That’s why she herself is so sour. She doesn’t like dessert-type food either. 

11. Who likes horror movies/ Who likes romance movies?

Camden is of course a sucker for romance movies, and so is Valerie. Oliver doesn’t mind them. Luna pretends to hate them and then finds herself up at 1am watching Hallmark movies. whoops

Cam is just a movie junkie and also loves horror. Val will watch them if someone else wants to, but does not go out of her way to choose to watch them. Luna and Oliver hate horror movies. Will not for any reason watch them.

12. Who is smol/ Who is tol?

Based off of energy, Luna and Cam have tol energy and Val and Oli have smol energy. Which works for their actual heights too… 

13. Who is considered the scaredy cat?

Oliver and Luna lMAOOOO poopy heads

14. Who kills the spiders?

Camden would kill it, but Valerie would take it outside while Oli and Luna are crying outside and planning on where to move. 

15. Who is scared of the dark?

Valerie actually is still scared of the dark...

16. Who is scared of thunderstorms?

Valerie and Luna. So they’re a mess together. Its… they need help… 

17. Who works/ Who stays at home?

Val, Cam, and Luna would all go out to work. And Oli is the homebody who just stays home/works from home. 

18. Who is a cat person/ Who is a dog person?

Oliver is a dog person.

Val likes both, leans toward cats.

Cam likes both, leans toward dogs.

Luna is not an animal person. Get them away from her. She won’t touch them. Gross.

19. Who loves to call the other one cute names?

VALERIE AND CAMDEN MOST DEFINITELY USE PET NAMES OMG KEEP THEM AWAY FROM ME EWW

Oliver might if he’s feeling confident. And we all know how Luna feels about affection. Gross 

20. Who is dominant/ Who is submissive?

Luna and Cam are most definitely doms. Cam is more like,,, a soft dom? Luna just. Dominant.

Val is a switch and will most definitely dom both Cam and Luna and even though they’re also doms it’s like,,, you can’t just dom dom Val, y’know? If she wants to dom she’s gonna dom

Oliver is a subby sub we all been known hes b a b y

21. Who has an obsession (over anything)?

VALERIE AND WE BEEN KNEW

Cam has an obsession with memes and his love

Oli obsesses over books

Luna is obsessed with herself whoops

22. Who goes all out for Valentine’s Day?

CAMDEN OMG HE WOULD GO ALL. OUT. FOR HIS LOVE BECAUSE ITS LOVE DAY AND HE LOOOOVES YOOOUUUUu

23. Who asks who out on the first date?

Cam always makes the first move

Luna usually makes the first move, but Valerie had to ask her on the first date because Luna is an idiot.

24. Who is the talker/ Who is the listener?

Cam is the talker and Oli is the listener. Obvi.

Cam and Val? Booooth. They both do both. Mutual loving relationship. They’re idiots. I hate them. 

Val will talk and talk and talk and Luna doesn’t listen unless it’s like a serious heart-to-heart. Luna doesn’t talk about her feelings and Val has to force them out of her.

25. Who wears the other ones clothes?

Ohmygosh Valerie wears everyones clothes regardless of who shes with.

When Luna/Cam see her in one of their shirts? They m e l t

Luna loves to dress Valerie up in her clothes

And Oliver likes to steal Cams clothes sometimes. He wouldn’t go out in public but Cam is just so much bigger than him so the clothes awh baby okay

26. Who likes to eat healthy/ Who loves junk food?

Valerie, Cam, and Oli all love junk food and Luna physically cannot down junk food.

Cam and Oli know how to eat healthy though

Valerie… she lives off of caffeine and potato chips she does not know what a carrot is. Like carrot cake? No? Then idk she dont know

27. Who takes a long shower/ Who sings in the shower?

Valerie does both

Camden and Oli take long showers

Luna is in and out. And somehow was able to effectively wash all her hair, clean and shave her entire body, give herself like a full facial and mani-pedi, buy a house, perform heart surgery, and like brush her teeth in like ten minutes.

28. Who is the book worm?

Oliver and Valerie lol

29. Who is the better cook?

Luna and Valerie cannot cook for crap

And Cam is better at baking...

Has Oliver ever even step foot in a kitchen??

...they’ll all just order takeout. for the benifit of literally everyone.

30. Who likes long walks on the beach?

Camden and Valerie would

Luna prefers to like,,, sunbathe. That’s the only reason to be at the beach lol

Oliver doesn’t do beaches.

31. Who is more affectionate?

Cam and Val and we been knew

32. Who likes to have really long (deep) conversation?

AGAIN. CAM AND VAL. IT’S LIKE THEY WERE MADE FOR EACH OTHER HMM

33. Who would wear “not guilty” t-shirt/ Who would wear “sin” t-shirt?

Luna- Not guilty, Val- Sin

Oli- Not guilty, Cam- Sin

CAM AND VAL ARE JUST SIN AHH

34. Who would wear “if lost return to…” t-shirt/ Who would wear “I am…” t-shirt?

Valerie and Oliver do be gettin lost tho

Need to be returned to Luna and Cam

35. Who goes overboard on the holidays?

omg Camden my boi. He’s just so excited and hyped. Also, his family is no help because they’re always going overboard

Valerie will also go overboard. But nobody beats Camden lol

36. Who is the social media addict?

Luna?? Have you met this chick??

37. Height difference or age difference?

Luna and Val have a three inch height difference (when Luna is wearing flats), and Valerie is older by like... two months

OKAY Valerie and Camdens height difference is 10 inches. awh. I’m a sucker for height differences look at themmmmm. And then Cam is seven months older

Cam is only three inches taller than Oliver :) And Cam claims the title as the oldest, being four months older than Oli

38. Who likes to star gaze?

Omh Camden is such a hopeless romantic and he’ll do this just so he can turn his head and see his love staring up with the stars in their eyes. Also so he can use dumb star related pick up lines on them

Valerie loves this! Look up at the stars! So pretty! She may not know anything about them, but she loves them!

Luna will join Valerie because yeah, they’re pretty :) And so is the cute girl next to her whoop

39. Who buys cereal for the prize inside?

.....Camden

40. Who is the fun parent/ Who is the responsible parent?

When it comes to parenting, Valerie and Cam would be a fun/responsible duo. They are both the good cop and bad cop. They know how to balance it, because they grew up with balanced parents.

Luna would be more responsible. She isn’t exactly a ‘kid’ person, and really didn’t have great parental influences growing up, and doesn’t want to have her child run off and be unsupervised/feel neglected like her

Oliver is in a similar boat. 

SO THANK GOODNESS FOR VAL AND CAM

41. Who cries during sad movies?

Omg I swear Camden and Valerie are like the same person it’s disgusing. Anyways. They.

Oliver may? Depends on how sad it is.

Luna has no emotions. Gross.

42. Who is the neat freak?

V A L E R I E omg she will clean up the smallest mess. Which is funny because you look at her and her bedroom and think she’s a mess herself which she is but she’s an orginzed mess

43. Who wins the stuffed animals at the carnival for the other one?

Valerie and Camden will be competitive and try to win each other prizes, but like, against the other? If that makes sense?

Oliver will gladly accept what Cam wins for him

When Val offers to win one for Luna, she’ll be like ‘ew gross I don’t want one of those’. Valerie gets one anyways, and Luna adores it anyways.

44. Who is active/ Who is lazy?

Honestly none of them are lazy per se, but the most active I think are Luna and Valerie. I mean, Luna is just an active, work-outy person. Valerie just cannot sit still for longer than three minutes. 

Camden and Oli like to relax from time to time. Just. Sit. Alone or with each other. 

45. Who is more likely to get drunk?

Luna and Cam (poor Valerie lol)

46. Who has the longer food order?

Camden!! This boy eats a lot!! And where does it all go?!

47. Who has the more complex coffee order?

Ohmygoodness Valerie. She drinks so much coffee, and her orders are always different and bizarre. 

48. Who loses stuff?

Oliver. Poor boy. Val misplaces things quite often, too.

49. Who is the driver/ Who is the passenger?

Camden is the only good driver here.

Between Luna and Val, Valerie drives but only because Luna refuses to. That does not mean she is good.

50. Who is the hopeless romantic?

The obvious answer here is Camden. He takes the cake for being a hopeless romantic. He loves the idea of love, and being in love. Having someone to love. Love. He goes over the top, stares at them, he’s just in love and isn’t afraid to show it.

HOWEVER

I think all of them, once in their relationship, shows how hopelessly romantic they are for their loves. That’s just what happens when you’re with the one.

lol. I know this isn’t like... how this was supposed to go but I couldn’t choose just one couple :)

#anyways #i hate all of them #and i say that in the most loving way possible #cool beans #valerie haywood #oliver steinbeck #camden fienes #luna hearst #cambeck #lunarie #camarie #my characters #ships #otp

[sweetpxsin]

Stray Kids When Their S/O is Shorter Than Them

Requested: this wasn’t actually formally requested but I thought I’d be fair to all my short people to have one just for them// thought don’t hate me if parts contradict with the tall s/o part

Member: Stray Kids

Plot: when their s/o is shorter than them

Genre:floof

Note: I saw this in the comments and was like why the hell not also sorry these are so short  [ Master List ]

[ C H A N ]

•I’m sorry did you hear that? No? Well it was Chan LETTING OUT THE BIGGEST FUCKING UWU

•Your official name is bby girl/boy it doesn’t matter if you have a name because now it’s invalid

•Head and forehead kisses for days

• and you can bet Chan is gonna come up from behind you and pick you up at the randomest times ever

•and you will never know if it’s a insult or if he just really finds your height that cute

•Though deep down you know that you go that boy whipped periodt

•big spooning you is his jam

•but every once and a while he’s all in for you attempting to big spoon him cuz he finds it cute

•like the way you can barely wrap your arms over him has him sent into uwus

[ W O O J I N ]

•Listen he doesn’t care how tall or how short you are, you’re dating and all this boy needs is your cuddles and love

•and if you ain’t gonna give that to this cute cuddly bear you can bet he’s using your small frame to his advantage

•he will literally make you stop whatever you're doing, pick you up and suddenly y’all are cuddling on the couch

•but who’s really complaining tho?

•doesn’t really pick on your height either

•besides the fact he might coo and tease you about your height if you ask him for help or for a lift

•he’s still gonna pick you up though

•because any reason to pick you up is a good reason to pick you up for a small cuddle session

•but legit all he wants is a good ass cuddle with his bby girl/boy

[ M I N H O ]

•HA y’all thought Minho wouldn’t bully your midget havin ass (jk I luv my short readers <3- don’t hurt me I’m short i swear)

•forreal won’t let you live a day without reminding you you’re shorter than him

•Though he loves you  and he makes sure you know he’ll love you no matter how “vertically challenged” you are

•But you best believe he ain’t letting you live a peaceful life

•He’s going to be that annoying boyfriend that rests his arm on your head, pretends not to see you, and ask if you need a lift to see and all that harmless stuff to annoy you

•and even though he’s an annoying prick he really enjoys when you do ask him for help

•or when he watches you get on your tippy toes for a kiss

•cause to him that’s the cutest shit ever and he can’t help but giggle every time you do

[ C H A N G B I N  ]

•a monumental moment for my boy changbin- (okay I’m sorry)

•ANYWay- will deadass actually watch you struggle (cuz he knows that struggle too wel-)

•and he won’t help till you’re either whining or giving him that cute ass pout that sends his heart soaring

•but he can only give you a boost cause y’all know our boy’s short

•though on the realest he really enjoys your height and thinks it’s the cutest

•like if he catches you in one of his hoodies he might tease you but deep down in his dark boi heart he’s uwuing

•yeah you know when the little prick laughed at you cuz your hair dryer suddenly was on the top shelf?

•lil hoe put it there cause he just wants to see you act cutely then proceeded to hold you to help you

•even tho sometimes you hit him cause your annoyed with his antics it’s worth the pain

[ H Y U N J I N ]

•deadass will laugh at your height struggles till maybe you kick him in the shins

•Though in honesty he thinks your height is absolutely the cutest most perfect for him

•Mostly because he has more excuses to hold you and give forehead/head kisses

•his favorite tho is when after a good ass nap you koala bear him

•but it’s mostly because he can continue to feel your warmth even tho he’s up and about in the dorm

•oH NO NVM HIS FAVORITE IS WHEN YOU ASK FOR SOMETHING FROM THE TOP SHELF AND HE HOLDS IT EVEN HIGHER JUST TO GET A CUTE LITTLE kiss uwu

•but either way he’d love how smol you are and sometimes wishes he could put you in his pocket

•so in conclusion who’s more whipped for who?

[ J I S U N G ]

•that one hoe that buys hoodies that he knows you’ll both like but mostly cause he wants to catch you in them

•and will be devastated if he ain’t seeing you in one or none of his hoodies smell like you

•honestly probably only one of the boys who’s absolutely obsessed with your height

•like he actually genuinely thinks your the purest and cutest of them all

•tip toe kisses has him sent, when you ask him for help to reach something has him uwuing, and little spooning you has him whipped

•point blank bis (okay I’ll stop)

•occasionally though will semi attack your height

•like if he’s really feeling playful you can bet your head is the next armrest

•or if you guys are in a cute little disagreement suddenly he can’t see you cuz the top of you head just barely makes his line of vision

•but either way he’s gonna be uwuing over you 25/8

[ F E L I X ]

•another super soft boy

•he has urges to roast you 80% of time but he won’t say em

•cuz you know he’s really trying to get that extra cuddle or kiss

•but when he does tease you it’s mostly to get you annoyed

•still though will probably get that cup on the top shelf no questions asked because he knows he can kiss your forehead before giving it

•but that’s like not even his favorite part

•he absolutely lovessss it it when you clinging onto him cuz he he’s a clingy person himself and just being able to feel your warmth while being able to hold you makes his hearts to back-flips

•like carrying you on his back, allowing you to wrap your arms around his ways or just laying on his chest IS HIS MOTHER FRICKEN JAM

•and the fact your so smol makes it 10x better js

[ S E U N G M I N ]

•”Sorry y’all hear something down there?”

•is a little bully but at the same time let’s you live...most of the time

•Will go from cooing over you to clowning on you for your height regardless if your taller or not

•like he’ll actually be going on about how he thinks your the cutest

•and then one second later will clown on you cause you had to climb the counter to reach the top shelve

•secretly loves when you ask him for help though

•but it ain’t really a secret cause he literally coos at everything you do

•is the most whipped even though likes  to tease you about your height

•mostly teases you cause he think your the cutest and since your so cute just can’t help but want to tease you

[ J E O N G I N ]

•doesn’t really have much of an opinion on your height

•but thinks it cute that you’re shorter because you can rely on him for reaching things that are to high or too far back in the self

•and he really likes that cause it’s usually him relying on his hyungs

•Might clown on your height here and there especially if you clown on him for something else

•like idk his cuteness what can you make fun Jeongin for actually?

•But over all he really likes your height because according to him it’s perfect “standing cuddle height”

•it’s also according to him it’s also really convenient

•cuz if his hyungs suddenly enter the room or walk in on both of you being cute

•he can slyly turn around and hide you even tho he knows very well y’all still getting tease

#stray kids #stray kids scenarios #stray kids imagines #skz #bang chan #chan #kim woojin #woojin #lee minho #minho #leeknow #changbin #seo changbin #hyunjin #hwang hyunjin #jisung #han jisung #lee felix #felix #kimseungmin #seungmin #yang jeongin #jeongin #kpop #kpop scenarios #kpop imagines

[matronaa]

Jungkook “fuckboy?” drabble

Pairing: Jungkook x Reader

Word count: 1,637

Genre: Fluff/mentions of smut?

Okay look its about 1 in the morning while im writing this and i just got done literally scrolling thru @jungshookz  e n t i r e page and honestly ive been delusionally laughing over her stories for like an hour and a half like the tattooartist!jungkook fic legit killed me i love it  and i’m probably going to force my friend to check her out because legit i love it so much and she seems like such a funny person and if she sees this 1) ily and ur writing and i wanna be friends but idk how to start a conversation because im a awKwARd bEan and 2) im sorry for probably spamming ur notifications with likes okay i couldnt help it so now im inspired for the first time in a while to write but im way to loopy to put together an actual fic so enjoy this ig

Okay i should stop rambling (okay just note that im so sleep deprived that i had to google ‘words for excessive talking’ to remember the word rambling because im an idiot and i cant think and ooo its 1:11 am rn make a wish b*tches)

Okay im sorry ill begin~

A/n all of this is completely unedited and if bad grammar annoys you srry not srry

Lets talk about what fuckboy!jungkook is oki

I feel like in reality there are just a bunch of rumors about him but hes so smol and hes the quiet type so he doesnt have the energy to dismiss them

Like im sorry soft jungkook is way to good in my mind rn okay #cuddles4days im not in the mood for him to strangle me with his amazing biceps

Anyway

you never rlly met him in the 4 years of going to the same highschool as him (since you’re in those smart people classes like humanities) until senior year

You and him had the same AP Lit. class lmao english class is  l i t

Which surprised you bc of the rumors like i thought he was a badboy ?? arent those normally idiots ??

Nah my bby is a smart nugget, he just likes to look hella bf 25/8

First day of school cliche where you show up late to class and have to sit next to him because i  d i e  for those plots okay

But you dont know thats him because you’ve never seen him, so you’re confused on why most of the girls keep glaring at you

But soon enough you catch on and you’re like fml

And then the professor is like “where you are sitting is your assigned seating for the rest of the year” and you’re like f m L

He ends up introducing himself to you because i mean like table buddies

But hes really nervous because hes a cute little bean and you’re hella cute cuz lets be honest ur probably wearing like basic black leggings and a hoodie with your hood over your head to hide the bed hair you didnt feel like brushing that morning

Oh, just me? Okay…

He likes ur name because it rolls off the tongue and he thinks it suits you even tho he doesnt know you

Yet ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

You dont really think hes a fuckboy because he seems so nice and he has the cutest lil bunny smile sEE

That is until after school u end up getting to ur locker late because u left something in one of your classes

And u see him pinning a girl against the lockers down the hall

And ur like well shit nvm

And u quickly get ur shit and go because das  a w k w a r d

But then he sees u run off and hes like awh crap i dun fucked up

A few weeks go by and u notice he barely really comes to class so u usually sit alone

On days he does come his chair seems extra close to yours and he’s basically smothering you

But u dont mind because he smells nice

And on the days he does come you get kinda excited because

1) you get a partner who doesnt expect you to do all of the work

2) this boy cute when he gets all intelligent

Ur  like “yes pls continue speaking about the essay we are writing that i have no idea is on because i kept getting lost in the sound of ur voice”

He notices when u zone out because you start staring at his lips when hes talking and he thinks its the cutest thing

One day u get assigned a week long project and ur close enough friends with jungkook to basically scold and force him to come to class all week

But only if he can force u to come to his house to work on it after school

Which you’re low key nervous of because ur going to a ‘fuckboy’s house’ by yourself

And u dont wanna do the dirty because ur a pure child haha not for long

But you agree anyway

And honestly even after the project is done (which you got an A on) you continue going over to his house because his bed is comfortable and he always has snacks

And his mom loves you

Like legit on days you dont go the next day you do she’s like “wheRE WERE YOU”

When the semester is over the professor lets you pick seats but you both enjoy each other’s company so you stay seated together.

finally ur at his house one day and ur just laying on his bed scrolling thru insta and he’s sitting on his bean bag in the corner on his phone and u look up at him and realise

Shit

You like him

Like a lot

And u mentally face palm because this was not supposed to happen

But it happened and you’re too far down the hole to climb out

Sometimes u end up napping at his house after school because his bed is more comfortable than yours and one friday night u wake up in his arms

And its like the best feeling ever

Its so warm and hes so cuddly hes like latched onto you

You stay under the warm blankets before you question when he even got in bed since he was playing video games before you fell asleep

And then his phone lights up and ofc you check it for him bc ur a nosey bitch

But not before you observed how adorable he was while he was sleeping

Nope not creepy at all

its his friend tae texting him (you didn’t really know his friends since you had different friend groups)

You check it and its smth like “stop staring at y/n while shes sleeping and reply u creep”

And you’re like w a t

So you scroll up and see that while u were sleeping jungkook went on a full rant on how cute u are and how whipped he is

And ur like holy fadoodles dis boy likes me

And so u decided to text tae like “this is y/n, does he actually like me”

Which turns into you both having a convo on how thirsty jungkook is until he wakes up

Hes like wtf r u doing and he snatches the phone and reads through your messages with tae while u like sit up to stare at him

And he’s still half asleep so it takes him to realise whats going on

“Omfg y/n i can explain-”

He starts rambling about how long he had been crushing on u and that he didn’t want to tell you because you seemed uninterested so he kept it a secret and never told anyone

And honestly he was freaking out because the onE tiMe he tells anyone that he likes you, you find out

But while he’s rambling you’re coming up with an excuse to text your mom that you’re spending the night at his house, so you just say he’s not feeling well and his parents are gone for the weekend.

Lmao she doesnt care she’s just like “lmao ik ur lying but have fun dont get pregnant”

Or Maybe thats just my mom idk

You have to shut him up by snatching his phone out of his hands and kissing him

When you pull away you’re just like “you talk too much lmao”

You explain to him that you like him too and u just get under the covers again and snuggle up next to him, and he wraps his arms around you

And you stay like that for a while before hes like “its late you should get home”

And you tell him you’re staying the night whether he likes it or not

And he is so down for that

But then you end up just spending the weekend there because why not his parents love you

And every night is just filled with cuddling, watching netflix, making out, late night snacks, etc.

Saturday night he gets a lil touchy and soon enough ur like straddling him and grinding your hips against his

But then he’s like “Ive never done this before” and you c o m b u s t

Ur like aren’t you like the school fuckboy how have you not done this

And he tells you its all just rumors and hes too lazy to set the record straight

And you basically decide to take things slow that night since it was you’re first time too and honestly it was so cute

It wasn’t really steamy rough sex it was more soft fluffy love making that is filled with giggling and exploring and appreciating each other

That was definitely the night you fell in love with him

Which is big because you thought love was gross

The next day you’re cuddling and he’s like “you know ur my gf now”

And ur like duh

You start going on cute dates after that like going to cafes or amusement parks

He loved taking you to the beach during the summer because u looked gr8 in a bikini

You found out you were going to the same college with was fantastic, so you decided to rent an apartment together nearby the campus instead of living in a dorm.

Which normally you’d be against because moving in together so quickly ?? but you felt different like this relationship was going to last

UNTIL HE CHEATED

Lmao jk gotcha bitch

My baby is too pure and innocent to cheat

Well innocent until you both get into bed and then oh lord it gets steamy

He wants to experiment with like e v e r y t h i n g and honestly you were down

But ofc you set some boundaries.

There were lines he couldn’t cross

I mean sometimes he tried but you shut that down real quick

Overall your relationship was perfect and you couldn’t ask for a better boyfriend

I mean he brought you pizza rolls and dr pepper to ‘study dates’ how could you not love him.

Oml it took me over an hour to write this its like 2:30 am why am i awake anyway imma go to bed now, idk ur name jungshookz but pls write more fanfics i need more to read late at night okay gnite

#jungkook #bts #btsjungkook #Jungkook oneshot #jungkook fluff #jungkook smut #bts one shot #jungkook x reader #jeon jeongguk #im so sleep deprived #why am i awake #imagine #bts imagines #jungkook ima

[robinofinashiro]

- request from anonymous: “loving your writing style, especially the yandere alphabet. you’re doing great btw. i was wondering if you can do bokuto from haikyuu yandere alphabet with non-con. but you don’t have to add the non-con if you don’t want to. Lol. Thank you if you get the chance to do this!” 

- request status: open

- pairing: yandere bokuto x fem! reader

A - Affection: How do they show their love and affection? How intense would it get?

Bokuto is INTENSE with his affection. he is all about physical, emotional, and verbal affection. you cannot get away from this man and the way he is with you. you are everything to him and he shows that in every single way he can. 

B - Blood: How messy are they willing to get when it comes to their darling?

honestly, Bokuto doesn’t seem like the type to want to get messy and he’ll use it as a last resort but if he sees that someone is trying to get close to you, he will be on the lookout and will not hesitate to start killing someone. 

C - Cruelty: How would they treat their darling once abducted? Would they mock them?

he’ll pamper you. treat you as though you have been in love with him since you first saw him. Bokuto is a very heavy delusional yandere. he thinks that he’s the only person in your world and that no one else matters. 

D - Darling: Aside from abduction, would they do anything against their darling’s will?

ummm, he wants kids. a lot of them. he wants to make an entire team basically. if he sees that you don’t want kids, adoption is always an option. but regardless, he will get kids whether you want to your not. also will unknowingly track your phone. 

E - Exposed: How much of their heart do they bare to their darling? How vulnerable are they when it comes to their darling?

oh, poor Bokuto. he thinks that you really care about him. he straight up thinks that you love him like he loves you and will tell you everything about his life. he doesn’t care. again, very delusional so he doesn’t really see the fact that you don’t care for him. 

F - Fight: How would they feel if their darling fought back?

Emo mood like no other. he has to get Akaashi wrangled up in his relationship but honestly, he can’t bring himself to physically hurt you. i see a lot of people trying to make Bokuto some aggressive yandere but I personally can’t see it.

G - Game: Is this a game to them? How much would they enjoy watching their darling try to escape?

no, this is nothing of a game to Bokuto. he needs you. he can’t live without you. he’d get so upset if he saw you trying to escape. there’s no joy for him on his end. i can imagine he’d probably spiral if he watched you leave. 

H - Hell: What would be their darling’s worst experience with them?

probably when he first kidnapped them. the kicking, crying, screaming, and all of that hurt him so bad. Bokuto didn’t know how to calm them down and you were screaming so loudly. thankfully he actually installed sound proof walls. 

I - Ideals: What kind of future do they have in mind for/with their darling?

he wants kidssss and so manyyyy. like dead ass. he wants an entire team and you will give it to him. he wants what some of his team members have and not only that, he wants to see you at his game with his jersey on and you screaming his name. 

J - Jealousy: Do they get jealous? Do they lash out or find a way to cope?

very easily jealous. lowkey one reason why he doesn’t want you around his team. he knows he has some very attractive teammates ( AHEM HINATA, SAKUSA, AND ATSUMU ) and if he saw any of them even tempting to flirt with you, so sad that they’ll suddenly lose a teammate. 

K - Kisses: How do they act around or with their darling?

he’ll be all up on you. he doesn’t care. he’s all about the PDA. if he wants to kiss you, he’ll do it. if Bokuto wants to hold your hand, he will. if Bokuto sees you’re looking extra cute, he’ll smother you. if he gets to a certain point, he’ll even skip a practice to be with you. 

L - Love letters: How would they go about courting or approaching their darling?

he’d try to court you but he gets too anxious and will take you right after a few weeks. in this yandere universe, he’d probably have Akaashi as a voice of reason to wait but god damn it, he couldn’t. he probably took you out on like one date before taking you. 

M - Mask: Are their true colors drastically different from the way they act around everyone else?

everyone knows how expressive Bokuto is. they also know how he acts so a lot of that transfers over at home but turn the dial up to eleven. he’d def be more clingy to you and tbh, a part of Akaashi feels bad for you bc he knows the real Bokuto. 

N - Naughty: How would they punish their darling?

when Bokuto punishes, he PUNISHES. no holds bar. you have to absolutely push him to the edge tho bc he’d try not too. again, he would rather have Akaashi punish you but if Akaashi can’t or he wants to be the one to do it, he’d break a leg. leave marks on you. the whole shebang. 

O - Oppression: How many rights would they take away from their darling?

most of them. you don’t have car rights, phone rights, outside privileges, NOTHING. Bokuto is very paranoid you’d try to leave so he’d do everything in his power to strip you of your rights. and if you are online, he watches everything you do. 

P - Patience: How patient are they with their darling?

very patient! he’d take everything you’d do and try and justify it. he knows he pushes the limit on the slip ups you do, however; once his patient does wear thin, he’ll def not hold back or even ask Akaashi not too. but overall consensus, very patient. 

Q - Quit: If their darling dies, leaves, or successfully escapes, would they ever be able to move on?

Bokuto will k word himself. no doubt. you are his life. you are above volleyball. you are above his friends and family. if you die, he does as well. if you escape, LMFAOOO, you’re not. he keeps your home secured and that isn’t even a thought. 

R - Regret: Would they ever feel guilty about abducting their darling? Would they ever let their darling go?

nope! very delusional yandere so he doesn’t see his actions as wrong. he’s a ray of sunshine that sees nothing even mildly weird about kidnapping you. again, the chance of you leaving is a NO. you’re with him until you or him die. 

S - Stigma: What brought about this side of them (childhood, curiosity, etc)?

honestly, probably curiosity. he sees other yanderes and their darlings and instantly craves it. as far as we know, Bokuto has no depressing or sad backstory so it’s just his thoughts that bring him into kidnapping and keeping you. 

T - Tears: How do they feel about seeing their darling scream, cry, and/or isolate themselves?

see letter H.

U -Unique: Would they do anything different from the classic yandere?

again, the whole physical punishment thing is not really his favorite thing to do. he’d rather let someone else do it or have you punish yourself in the sense of self isolation. he wants to keep you alive so he won’t starve you or anything.  

V - Vice: What weakness can their darling exploit in order to escape?

honestly, probably his depressive episodes. that’s their best chance but that probably won’t work out. he knows what to tell you and what not too so you can’t exactly exploit something in specific. just the depressive episodes are your best bet. 

W - Wit’s end: Would they ever hurt their darling?

see letter H.

X - Xoanon: How much would they revere or worship their darling? To what length would they go to win their darling over?

all the fucking time. he worships you like a god. you are his god. he’d do anything and everything for you. he’d kill someone for you. he’d go to the ends of the earth for you and he’d do it right by your side. like his obsessive streak with you is not one for games. 

Y - Yearn: How long do they pine after their darling before they snap?

he’d watch you 25/8. stalking is a big thing. he’d pick up anything that you threw away or accidentally dropped. probably has a shrine of your small trinkets. 

Z - Zenith: Would they ever break their darling?

probably psychologically. he won’t hesitate to fuck with your mind. he sees it as the only way he could hurt you without actually having to physically put his hands on you. once the stockholm syndrome settles, ITS GO TIME BABYYYY.

#haikyuu imagine #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu x you #anime x you #anime #anime imagines #sports anime #bokuto koutarou #bokuto koutarou x reader #bokuto koutarou x you #bokuto koutarou imagine #yandere haikyuu #yandere bokutou kotarou

[x0401x]

Mekakucity Talkers: Chapter 3

For some reason, it seems something terrible happened…!?

← Previous || Index || Next →

Mekakushi-dan Chatroom

Hibiya: Anyone! Isn’t there anyone around!? Help!

??: What’s wrong? Are you okay?

Hibiya: Aah, thank goodness! It is an emergency! I do not know who you are, but please help me out!

??: Oops. To think I’d do something like this... I forgot to set up my username and picture.

Ene: All~ right! This Ene-chan shall grant your wish by any means!

Hibiya: Change with someone!

Ene: Hah!? What’s with that?! Do you have any problem with the hyper super pretty virtual girl Ene-chan?!?

Hibiya: Anyone else!? Isn’t there anyone else around!?

Ene: Speaking of which, it seems no one has come today, huh~

Hibiya: What about Shintarou!?

Ene: Master is usually here, right~? Now that you mentioned it, I haven’t seen him since earlier. Isn’t he in the toilet or something?

Hibiya: Then he’ll come back soon!?

Ene: No, Master will probably take one more hour.

Hibiya: Haah!? An hour in the toilet!? What the heck!?

Ene: Master also has his own issues... By the way, hasn’t it been a while? You were forced to go back to your town, weren’t you?

Hibiya: No, I just went back like normal. Well~, how can I put it? I feel like returning home? I’ll be living in the city in the future~, so if I think of this as my last time living in the countryside, it’s not bad, I guess~? Something like that.

Ene: Aren’t you having too big of a misunderstanding after having come to the city just one time?!

Hibiya: I-It’s not a misunderstanding! I really am thinking of taking the admission exam of a middle school from Tokyo and I’m getting ready for it!

Ene: Are you seriously planning to live in Tokyo!? Isn’t that great~?! From now on, you’ll be able to see everyone right away, huh?!

Hibiya: Well, about that... I gotta begin studying for the middle school admission exam~, so I don’t have time to fool around with the... “Mekakuso-dan”, was it~?

Ene: H-H-Hold on! This is a way of making a mistake that you shouldn’t get behind! It’s ME-KA-KU-SHI-dan, you see!!

Hibiya: Sorry, sorry, I typed wrong. But, well, shouldn’t everyone else also quit these embarrassing activities and start contemplating their furute by now~? It’s what I think.

Ene: G-Guh...

Hibiya: You, too, are a “virtual girl”, right? Shouldn’t you graduate from that already?

Ene: Y-You...! That’s a bit too cocky! My appearance is of a physically weak and lovely girl, but even Ene-chan can get angry! For starters, there’s something called “respect” that you should have for older people.

Hibiya: What, should I refer to you as “Auntie”?

Ene: Uuhn!? You picking a fight!?

Hibiya: Uwah! S-Stop ringing up my phone’s vibrator! Hiih! Somehow, a ton of mail is arriving from weird places!! A lot of messages like “thank you for your membership” are coming to me!! I’m sorry, I’m sorry!!

Ene: It’s fine as long as you get it. As long as you get it. Or, rather, what was your business in the end? Why don’t you go study since you love it so much and then hurry to bed? *spit, spit*

Hibiya: R-Right, I had forgotten. I’m... locked up.

Ene: Hah? That’s... like an incident? Like kidnapping? Bad guys!? Hey, it’s no time to be doing this! Please help, Master~!! No, police~!!

Hibiya: Sorry to interrupt while you’re so ecstactic, but it’s not an incident or kidnapping.

Ene: Is that so? If it’s not an incident or kidnapping, then is it a strange phenomenon...? Or you’re being offered as live sacrifice...?

Hibiya: Your prejudice against the countryside is too horrible!

Ene: If it’s not something like that, then what is it?

Hibiya: Well, my family is pretty strict, you see. I told my parents that I was gonna take an admission exam for a Tokyo middle school, and they completely opposed to it. When I woke up in the morning, I was inside our warehouse...

Ene: Aah, that’s what it was... Then, do your best.

Hibiya: Wait a minute! This phone is my only salvation!!

Ene: Your parents are severe, huh? You were quite forfeited, huh~?

Hibiya: This is just ‘cause I finally managed to get my hands on a much-wished-for cellphone! I hide it in my pants when I go to sleep so that my parents won’t find out and so that I don’t leave it out of my reach!

Ene: Uwah...

Hibiya: I was also able to receive heat from the warm phone in my pants, even from within this cold shack!

Ene: Hieh...

Hibiya: Hey, you can move into phones, right? Come to mine!

Ene: Eh~. Isn’t it a long journey to go all the way there~? It’s pretty far, right~?

Hibiya: I don’t know how it works, but through electromagnetic waves, it takes only an instant, right!?

Ene: Kaah~! This is why children now-a-days are so...! You think anything can be solved with electromagnetic waves! You won’t become a proper adult in the future!

Hibiya: You’re going there!?

Ene: In the first place, it’s better if I don’t go.

Hibiya: Eh, why?

Ene: Won’t people find out you have a phone if we talk?

Hibiya: Aah, is that so...?

Ene: Also, I don’t wanna go to a phone that was in someone’s pants.

Hibiya: Doesn’t that have nothing to do with it?

Ene: It’s a matter of feelings!

Hibiya: Man! That doesn’t matter! You’ll help me, right!?

Ene: Eh~? Are you okay with that way of asking~?

Hibiya: Uwah, what a handful...

Ene: Eh? What? You want someone to help you? Hm? What do they look like? Super pretty?

Hibiya: Hey~, that doesn’t matter at all!

Ene: Eh? You want her to help you? The Super Pretty Who-sama?

Hibiya: Ah~, man, I get it already! Super Pre-something Ene-sama, please help me!

Ene: Hmm~? I’m a bit concerned about the way you put it. Really, no choice~! This super pretty virtual girl Ene-sama will help you! So? How’s the situation of the interior?

Hibiya: E~rm... there’s only one door in the warehouse. It’s got a locker with a number code.

Ene: That’s a weird warehouse, huh~. Can it be opened from within?

Hibiya: Hn, looks like it... They said, “if you want to take the middle school exam, try solving this mystery”. There’s a paper with something like a cipher written on it. I think that, if I solve it, I’ll definitely find out the numbers for the locker.

Ene: Your parents are quite the entretainers, huh...?

Hibiya: Can I write down the cipher?

Ene: Hum, show it to me.

Hibiya: E~rm... “change the initial letters into numbers: 12/31 12/25 2/14” is what it says.

Ene: Hoh~, I see, I see.

Hibiya: How is it?

Ene: ......speaking of this, Master is late, huh~? Does he have a stomach ache or something~? This is that kind of thing, right~? He’s a good-for-nothing when I’m not around, right~? He’s calling, he’s calling~. I gotta go~.

Hibiya: See~! You totally didn’t get it! In the end, I should have asked someone else!

Ene: Oh~? Are you okay with this kind of attitude!? I could sneak into your phone and spread the~se and even tho~se kinds of pictures all over the chatroom!

Hibiya: That’s a terrible guess to make! Actually, can you do something that terrifying!? Just... Just cut me some slack with that.

Ene: Huhu~n? By this reaction, you also have nasty photos, don’t you~? Eek, eek, men are all like that~

Hibiya: “Nasty”, you say!? Rude!! My “This is Hiyori Mobile” is the ultimate image folder that pursues sophisticated beauty!

Ene: The name is gross!! You sure had courage to name it like that, huh!?

Hibiya: It’s because I dedicate my life to it!! This is nothing!! My lockscreen, e-mail address and ringtone have Hiyori-related specifications! Even my password is Hiyori’s birthday!

Ene: Isn’t that a police case?!! In the end, it’s better if you stay locked in that shack!! Hm? “Birthday”?

Hibiya: What? Got a problem with This is Hiyori Mobile or something!?

Ene: The name is gross! No, no, more important than that...! I found out the answer!

Hibiya: Eh? What?

Ene: These are dates!

Hibiya: Haah?

Ene: 12/31 is Oomisoka, right? If we assume that its initial is the English letter “o”, it would look like the number “zero”!

(T/N: Oomisoka or Ootsugomori is the name of New Year’s celebration, also used as a synonym for New Year’s Eve in Japanese.)

Hibiya: T-Then, 12/25 is Christmas, isn’t it? If the initial is “ku”, that means it becomes 9 if transcribed into a number?

(T/N: “Christmas” is written as “kurisumasu” in katakana, and “ku” is one of the readings of the number 9.)

Ene: That’s it! And 2/14 is Valentine! The “ba” definitely stands for 8!

(T/N: “Valentine” is written as “barentain” in katakana. “Ba” is close to “ha” and “pa”, which are syllabes associated with the number 8, which reads as “hachi”.)

Hibiya: W-Wait a bit! I’ll try to match the key numbers!

Ene: H-How was it?

Hibiya: I

Ene: “I”?

Hibiya: I got out~!!

Ene: Yeeeaaah!! Did you see that!? This is my power!! Ayo, ayo, please praise me grandly!!

Hibiya: I-It’s frustrating, but you did end up helping me... thanks.

Ene: No, no, I don’t need gratitude~! You don’t have to call me Ene-sama from now on~! Or to keep on talking forever about how you are alive due to Ene-sama, no way, no way~!

Hibiya: No, I didn’t say that much... Ah! My father is in front of the warehouse!

Ene: Ooh! Meaning that he was waiting because he believed in his son!? How touching! With this, they will allow you to take the exam!

Hibiya: Yeah!

Ene: Hm? Hey--Wait a moment! Is it all right for you to be typing this down? You were hiding from your parents that you had a phone... O~i.........

Hibiya has logged out.

Ene: Aah...

#kagerou project #kagepro #mekakucity actors #enomoto takane #ene #amamiya hibiya #mekakucity talkers #kagerou daze #my translation

[alien-bodies]

Oversharing Time!!!

(i just made that title up that’s not the official title I’m just Like That)

Ok so @frogyell​ tagged my main account (I am BLEST) but that’s for Refined Star Trek Content and this one’s for excellent moodboard content and garbage so here’s the garbage!!! I’m putting it under a cut bc it manipulates your brain to want to read through 85 fuckin facts about me more wow I love science

rules: answer these 85 statements about yourself, then tag 20 people.

1. last drink: Water! off to a great start

2. last phone call: my local Hot Topic. I feel like I should also mention I work there. But if you don’t know that and steal my phone you’ll see I have a contact named Hot Topic

3. last text message: Google sent me a verification code, but the last one I sent was to my brother it says “k”

4. last song you listened to: It’s called The Horror Of Your Love by Ludo, if I had to delete all but one song on my 121-song Best Enemies playlist I’d keep this one it’s Peak and kinda has vore but it’s metaphorical. metavoreical, if you will

5. time you cried: during my latest EMDR sesh! I was in Wales and everything it was a Lot I got ice cream after

6. dated someone twice? Big No

7. kissed someone and regretted it? Not really?

8. been cheated on? my ex had 16 anime dating sims downloaded at one point while we were dating does that count

9. lost someone special? yea

10. been depressed? hella

11. gotten drunk and thrown up? I’ve been drunk 1 time and it was when I was playing English handbells at my dad’s church’s wassail night but I did not throw up no

fave colors

12. Black

13. Lavendar

14. Light blue

in the last year have you…

15. made new friends? Hell Yell!!

16. fallen out of love? k i n d a ? ?

17. laughed until you cried? oh absolutely

18. found out someone was talking about you? OH BOY YUP YUP

19. met someone who changed you? yes! she managed to physically alter my hippocampus without touching it how fuckign whack is that

20. found out who your friends are? It’s always the same miraculous group chat

21. kissed someone on your facebook friends list? sure have

general

22. how many of your facebook friends do you know irl? I keep it nice and refined so all of them. My old account is another story

23. do you have any pets? one beautiful and talented cat named Moriarty. A good description is she’s got puppy software on cat hardware.

24. do you want to change your name? listen I’ve been through 4.5 of these fuckers, I like Nate, I’m Quite Finished

25. what did you do for your last birthday? invited 2 pals over, I remember one of them suddenly whipped out I Am The Doctor and the Dr Who theme on the piano out of fuckin nowhere and I was like “Daniel what the hell you’re so talented” and then I hardcore dissociated the rest of the day

26. what time did you wake up today? 10:00

27. what were you doing at midnight last night? chatting w @houseofoakdown​ and also editing my monstrosity of a fanfiction

28. what is something you cant wait for? Going back to school! then I can graduate in my pajamas and eat creamed corn in celebration

30. what are you listening to right now? the same goddamn playlist, this one’s called Battle Cry by The Family Crest, i cri erytiem

31. have you ever talked to a person named tom? probably???

32. something thats getting on your nerves? my brother vaping in the bathroom with the fan on at 12:30am

33. most visited website: tungle dot hell

34. hair color: I started out blonde af now I’m less blonde but still blonde.

35. long or short hair: short

36. do you have a crush on someone: :[] yes

37. what do you like about yourself: i’m hella smart, my moodboards are bangin, my writing is cool af, I’m well-hydrated at all times

38. want any piercings? Big No

39. blood type: A+!!!!! thats me!!!!!

40. nicknames: my brother calls me a goon sometimes

41. relationship status: im married to my laptop

42. zodiac: I was born on the last day of Taurus so I’m a definite Taurus/Gemini power combo

43. pronouns: they/them, tho in some places I use he/him bc The Dysphoria got hog wild enough I decided to pretend to be a trans guy so ppl would take me seriously, but I’m moving more towards they/them everywhere now. 

44. fave tv shows: Dr Fuck, Sherlock (I’m armed with a pitchfork and an arsenal of beefed up tv & film knowledge come on fight me), DOWNTON ABBEY

45. tattoos: in August I will get a bee on my right arm and probably a Secret Word in Gallifreyan on my left it’ll say fuck

46. right or left handed: one time I was bored in grade 10 and tried to make myself ambidextrous but that was a hassle so I’m firmly right handed. Except in archery.

47. ever had surgery: got all 4 wisom teeth out not long ago! I still need to squirt water in my gum holes so I get all the mushy food out :{

48. piercings: I used to have my ears pierced but they’re grown tf over now!

49. sport: first of all what the hell is this question looking for second of all I have a red belt (which is 2 below black belt) in Taekwondo. I really need to do that again hhhhhh

50. vacation: i went to England and France in the summer with my family as a “””grad trip”””, it was lots of fun but my collection of sensory issues extended to chomping and I dissociated so intensely in The Louvre my mom told me to go back outside so I wrote fanfiction while listening to 21 Pilots and chatting w my imaginary friends and it took me like 18 hours to process I’d seen The Mona Lisa with mine own 2 eyes. Also the plane was delayed twice bc we used Air Canada for some godforsaken reason and I had 0 hours of sleep when I went to the Sherlock Holmes museum and I started talkin to this bust of Sherlock Holmes and then I hadn’t eaten enough and we were walking to this bookstore and I said “I need food!” and my dad said “We’ll get it AFTER” then I shouted “I’M GONNA DIE” so I got a BLT from Tesco. 

51. trainers: h

more general

52. eating: the last thing I ate was chocolate chips straight out of the bag

53. drinking: I got another cup of water

54. im about to watch: my entire fanfiction to take 3000 notes on consistency. and by watch I mean read

55. waiting for: my brother (not vaping) to get out of the bathroom so I can PEE

56. want: Orphan Black to be on Netflix so I can actually binge watch it then call my grandma about it

57. get married: idk I didn’t think I was a get married person but since realizing I’m a lesbian it seems like a good idea!

58. career: nurse and a writer. I might just move to London and work double time to write enough scripts I have some street cred then pitch a TV adaptation of Faction Paradox to the BBC and win

which is better

59. hugs or kisses: hugs bc it means my friends are in my vicinity not Toronto

60. lips or eyes: uh. eyes???????????

61. shorter or taller: i’m 5′3″ and I would love a tol partner

62. older or younger: i don’t think I care

63. nice arms or stomach: what fresh hell does this mean. I’d like a nice stomach free of gastrointestinal issues and acid reflux. not that I have either of those but just in case

64. hookup or relationship: I have 300 many self-esteem issues so imma say relationship

65. troublemaker or hesitant: AU where I don’t have anxiety and I’m a trouble maker

have you ever

66. kissed a stranger: noop

67. drank hard liquor: I PUT RUM IN THE WASSAIL HELL YEAH also once someone bought me a shot at a queer dance thing bc it was payday and my friend told me to gulp the WHOLE SHOT and then the lemonade so I don’t barf and I was like “brah this is too high-stakes” so I poured the vodka in the lemonade and took sips and everyone stared at me

68. lost glasses: in grade 6 and then my mom threatened to make me wear one of those granny glasses chains so I never lost them again

69. turned someone down: ya this kid Cyrus used to chase me around in grade 5 and I’d run away always he was weird af one time he made out with a folder right in front of me in the middle of class

70. sex on first date: probs not at this point but I’m not opposed to the general idea when I’m less w h a c k e d  u p

71. broken someones heart: Not that I know of?

72. had your heart broken: c o n s i s t e n t l y in the most fricked up ways god

73. been arrested: no but once I booed at the police bc the local nazis (yeah) were gonna have a rally so we had a counter-rally and I dropped in but there were no nazis except one old dude in a MAGA hat showed up 2 hours late lmao

74. cried when someone died: oui

75. fallen for a friend: Big Lesbian Mood

do you believe in

76. yourself: YA BB

77. miracles: not as such

78. love at first sight: nah

79. santa claus: I wasn’t allowed to believe in Santa as a child bc he was “too much like God” sad

80. kiss on a first date: ye!

81. angels: big no

other

82. best friend’s name: I don’t exactly have a proper best friend but I’m goin with Liam

83. eye colour: blue/grey

84. fave movie: either The Force Awakens (bc I love bb8 and I’m gay 4 Rey) or Interstellar shut up

85. fave actor: uh idk let’s go with my brother

WOW THAT WAS LONG JEE🅱️US. I’m tagging @houseofoakdown @spoonietimelordy @gemvictorfromtheponyverse @spockswhales @raesand and that exhausts the ppl I know but you’re all worth quadruple in my heart 💖

#Open For Sicc Facts Abt Me #ianposting

[thunderfcknroad]

Tell👏us👏about👏them👏

Ok kids strap in for a journey through me and Hals childrenSo hal and idecided it would be a very funny concept story if there were a group of bards in a high fantasy setting who end up on an adventure but they literally have 0 sharp edges between them. Like 0 adventure training. They just want to play in their dumb band BUT OOPS SUDDENLY ONE OF THEM HAS A MYTHICAL SWORD THEY DONT KNOW HOW TO USE.theres 4 of them ~ Favian, Nerinphe, Helga, Piccolo.Favian is a fae. Hes trans. He left home abruptly when he discovered this bc he wanted to travel and find a new name for himself. When he found it though hed joined the band so he just hasnt got round to going home yet. He still sends his family post cards tho. Flying is something that uses a lot of energy for him so he tends to ride on Phe's shoulder but when he gets really excited or really angry he automatically starts floating upwards. He literally cant control it and it is endlessly funny to the rest of the group. Can understand all languages through fae magic but can speak like none. He speaks fae but his common is h e a v i l y accented. He plays the drum.Nerinphe is high femme but strong as heck. Comes from a tribe of warrior women (her 8 sisters are all warriors) but she has never touched a sword in her goddamn life. By the time she was born her mother was quite sick so she decided to spend her time looking after her. Her mother is also deaf so Phe is fluent in HFSL (high fantasy sign language). Her mother is the storyteller of their village and Phe takes time and pride in translating her stories from HFSL to paper and then ultimately to song. When she sings them she always does the sign language along with it.Helga is a nb dwarf. Their family left their dwarven clan bc they are pacifists so they grew up in a cottage on a hill. Is mega proud of their parents and goes back to visit them regularly. Keeps bees!!! Also has blue hair and puts flowers in their beard. There is literally not an ounce of tragic in helgas backstory they are just. Fab. They can also cook very well and band retreats are always held at their cottage. They play the fiddle.Piccolo. So Piccolo is part dragon.... His parents got involved in some magic bullshit while he was still in the womb and it got.... Confused. So Piccolo has green blood and dragon wings. Also this means his life span is kinda ridiculous and so porportionally hes the baby of the group. He left home bc he felt like his parents were only keeping him around out of guilt. He intends to go back someday but he needs to be confident in himself before he does. Hes kinda shy bc he doesn't want people to be embarrassed by his presence but when you get to know him he is super animated and lovely. They play the bugle. He and Helga have been dating for like.... Ages and theyre super dumb and cute and still blush at the dumbest things i hate them i love themAlso the band is called B4 and they go by "The Baby, The Beauty, The Brains, The Brawn" and everyone expects the corresponding characters to be fav, phe, pic, helga bc ~*stereotyping*~ but actually its pic, helga, phe, fav and anyways theyre nerds. I also drew them so expect an illustration of them to go up later today 💕💕💕💕

[bangtannnscenariosbro]

Hogwarts Students!BTS

Admin River speaks: ok i’ve had this idea for sO long and I’ve been rereading the series again for the 5th time rip me. but yeah just these are my opinions pls dont attack me ddjjfjfjs. Also I made this a while ago and recently Namjoon wrote where the members would be, I know, I know. So without further ado, enjoyyyy 

Tae

• the cute Gryffindor who always seems to smile • messy hair • and robes • his shirt is usually unbuttoned a few buttons • loose tie • his wand behind his left ear • chaser !!! • usually gets out of trouble because none of the teachers seem to be able to r e s i s t his s m i l e • headmaster/mistress probably has a soft spot for him • probably has rlly good grades, like all O’s maybe a few E’s • “but, professor” • can be restless and talkative in class • is probably rlly into care of magical creatures • Hagrid would absolutely a d o r e him • just so full of life • in the choir bc yes boi • h o g s m e a d e especially when its s n o w i n g

• most likely part veela

• like have you s e e n him

• beauty right there • is able to smuggle in firewhiskey

• laughs when the other students cant drink it and make a face

• laughs even more when they watch in horror as he downs a cup

• “the hell, tae ???”

• j o k e s h o p

• loves the Weasley’s joke shop

• talks to the ghosts and portraits a lot

• has probs accidently charmed a couple ladies in the portraits

• which comes in handy when he finds out all these secret passages

• loves flower crowns and loves making them during the spring

• “here yoongi i made u one”

• “..... I'm more concerned as how u knew thats my favorite flower.”

• “that’s your favorite flower?”

• “.... forget i said anything.”

• k just imagine after a game he flies down from his broom with a huge grin and pushes he goggles up and so his hair is all wild and even more messy

• n he brings every1 in a group hug and cheers “we won, we won !!!”

• even if they dont win be celebrates with the other team

•...somtimes.. be gets pouty tho

• “we literally could have won that was a foul :(“

Jin • cute Hufflepuff • always so full of advice

• if u want u could set up a lil date with him at hogsmeade to just talk about your problems and sip a warm drink • so s o motherly • sometimes he has a loose tie and disheveled hair • he has rlly nice skin and the other students are like ??? tell me ur secrets ??? • hufflepuff’s dorms are by the kitchens so he probably made friends with the elves working there • can probably walk in and out whenever he wants • the few times he walks in late to class he probably has a few crumbs on his mouth or robes or maybe like some sugar or flour and its so e n d e a r i n g • such a good student • pays so much attention in class • sometimes wears those glasses, you know which ones • the girls probably all like him • and a few boys too hehe coughsnamjooncoughs • probably likes charms and maybe divination • he probably also likes herbology • also is probably in the choir because i mean have you h e a r d h i m • loves going to Hogsmeade • probably is pretty good friends with Madame Rosmerta • exchanges recipes with her • he seems so sophisticated and people probs look up to him a lot • p r e f e c t • h e a d  b o y

• tells so many jokes to first years

• windshield laugh

• u would think the first years would be scared but no???

• they end being less nervous and smile and giggle with him

• even jin gets slightly surprised

• they end up getting close with him and almost like his own kids

• “but jiiiiiiiiinnn”

• “fine :/”

• ok but he stops so many fights n things from escalating too quickly

• both in the dorms and in bts

• even a couple teacher drama incidents

• professors lowkey want him to stay n teach there

• gets so worried??? About people ???

• he has a nervous tick where he keeps rubbing his hands as if he's putting on lotion

• but if he's rlly worried he's absolutely still and that's probs when u should be worried too Yoongi • ok he was rlly hard • like i wanted to say slytherin but idk i felt like i was stereotyping a bit by looks • i wanted to say ravenclaw but like idk man • i think I’m settling for g r y f f i n d o r • he’s rlly brave, man, like he went through so m u c h and he is so strong and f i g h t s back yanno • some ppl probably can't understand why he’s a gryffindor and he wants to keep it like that lol • he’s never seen doing his hw most of the time but gets ??? Perfect scores??? • he unbuttons one button on his shirt because its t o o t i g h t dammit i cant breathe • also slightly loose tie • defense against the dark arts all the way bro • a knack for transfiguration but gets so flustered when the professor compliments him which means red cheeks and wide eyes for days • hypes up quidditch so m u c h • like if its rlly cold and its raining he’d be like ew gross no im not going • but is a l w a y s there • gummy smiles and screaming when they win • he’s rlly good at quidditch but never joined bc “too much responsibility” • he’s lowkey insecure about his skills but sshh dont tell anyone • probs joins like 5th year

• a beater probably

• helps with stress lol • he has so much confidence and ppl appreciate that and wish they had that

• joon gave him a music box once cause he thought it was rlly pretty n yoongi just fell in love with it

• ink stained fingers

Jimin • the cute hufflepuff everyone adores • hypes up friends 25/8 • talks in class and then gets sheepish and embarrassed when he gets called out to stop • will fight??? Anyone ??? Who messes with his friends ??? • but liek if u hurt him u suddenly got all of hufflepuff as ur enemy sorry bro • he’s so so sweet like he probably gives all his professors gifts for the holidays • homemade cookies (with the help of jin ofc) • probably takes up knitting so that he can make scarfs 4 his frens • always there at quidditch games and hypes all his friend even if they’re against each other • he’s so reliable??? • giggles 4 days • but liek he is so cute n innocent but has laser focus and is so passionate about getting things done some ppl are just ??? Slytherin tho ??? • he’s the loyalist loyal to ever loyal • he probs enjoys muggle studies • muggle studies and potions • he likes the fact that you get all these ingredients and then end up with this huge product that can save lives or end them   w i l d t • will stay up rlly late if u need someone to talk to • will also make sure u go to ur dorm safely and probably tuck u in

• the kind of person every1 wants 2 protect

• but dOnt be fooled this boi can be solo mischievous

• its ok tho he cute

• he's like hot chocolate with whipped cream and caramel sauce

• ya feel?

• will break the rules if he has to don't underestimate him

• don't underestimate him in general

Namjoon

• ravenclaw!!!

• this boi is so smart like he could have easily pursued a career academically n wasnt he top of his class too ?

• even if that's wrong his lyrics sure prove it right

• he would do certain things and ppl would be like typical ravenclaw

• at first he was proudful of his house but then he slowly started getting insecure

• he didn't want to be known as this typical ravenclaw

• but he soon realizes that it's ok because he's just being himself n if ppl need to label things then o well

• v awkward but so w i s e

• like he thinks of so many abstract ideas that like??? It's amazing??

• carries around a lil notebook full of stories and poems

• so much p a t i e n c e

• he also feels so deeply and sometimes feels like exploding so he probably gets in lil moods where he wants to be alone

• luckily he has his frens (bts) who r like uhm bro let's talk

• so sweet and just wants the best 4 ppl but its sometimes hard to express t h a t

• stresses out easily during exams

• laughs and smiles that make flowers grow

• p r e f e c t a n d h e a d b o y

• he does lil things like save u butterbeer if ur not feeling well or get u sum sweets from Hogsmeade

• such a sweetheart

• luvs spending time outside especially during the spring

• lowkey writes poetry about his friends

• he just appreciates them so much

• transfiguration and ancient runes boi

• l i b r a r y

• Filch probably picks on the poor boy like

• joon is running back to his dorm after a study session in the library

• n filch is like iTs AftEr Hours

• and joon is like ??? I have 5 minutes ???

• sometimes he goes wide eyes like a deer in the headlights when he panics or doesn't know what's going on omg protect this boi

Hoseok

• okAy he's Ravenclaw tOo fIght mE

• he is just so fascinated by learning new things like

• wth that plant can do that???

• that animal exists ???

• w ow i e

• ok but sunshine boi

• is absolutely excited about herbology and care of magical creatures

• also charms

• he's just always so excited to learn new things !!!

• he stresses easily tho and breaks down a lot bc he gets a lot of pressure to get good grades

• like boi that's not ravenclaw calm ya shit

• frens defend him 25/8

• keeper!!!

• he learns to keep his wand hidden in weird places and like pulls it out at random places and ppl are like ???

• lots of screamign and happiness

• ppl get annoyed but it's hoseok he can do no wrong

• asks weird questions that are somehow relevant to the subject but r so abstract that even some professors are baffled

• he's so flexible ???

• like some ppl r just ??? How the h e ck??

• n liek the lil shit he is he winks and says “magic”

• lots of “hobi why”

• charms banners for quidditch when he doesn't play so they're all pretty n cool

• the school doesn’t suspect it's him

• him sharing a bunk with namjoon !!!

• luvs visiting Hagrid with Tae

• always has a new piece of info about dragons 2 share with Hagrid

• robes r usually wrinkled

• him wearing flower crowns/ bracelets that tae makes

Jungkook

• okay so

• hear me out

• s l y t h e r i n

• he was 15 when he debuted n liek ???

• he's 19 now ?? Thats a lot of ambition and hard work

• also he's a meme n he's cunning when he wants stuff

• n he also said he can handle hard schedules but when bts starts to hurt that's when he feels bad like ???

• but liek he gets kinda insecure sometimes bc slytherin is “””””bad””””””

• but he gets a talk from namjoon that ppl will be like that n to just ignore because a house is just supposed to let u be surrounded by ppl who r similar to u to learn better

• he also lowkey gives him permission to beat any1 up

• when he was younger he would sometimes sneak to other dorms

• to be with one of the members since be was insecure n shy with his house members

• but he soon grew confident and made other friends and bts were like proud moms lol

• seeker!!!!

• he always feels bad going against his frens but they just wink at him n he gets confidence

• frequent visits to madame pomfrey bc he a daredevil smh

• joins choir like 3rd year

• he hesitated for so long because he's an insecure bab and !!!!

• but tae n jin r liek cmon boi ur very good let's do this

• he pretends to be a bad boi with bts but he barely gets a glimpse of a professor n he quickly straightens his tie n smooths down his shirt

• art !!!!

• he likes to sketch ppl

• “hey yoongi do this with ur hands”

• wavy haired jungkook 6th n 7th year !!!!!

• his book bag has at least 2 sketchbooks

• he would feel so bad when ppl would notice his robes and point and whisper

• but they realized how he actually was n how bts treated him

• vvvv talented

• catches on to concepts right away

• ppl think he likes defense against the dark arts but actually……..

• care of magical creatures is his fav

• probs lowkey likes astronomy

#mama mario #sweg masta #j-sunshine #rap nun #chimchim #taetae baebae #golden kid #kim taehyung #taehyung #park jimin #jimin #jungkook #kim seokjin #seokjin #jin #namjoon #kim namjoon #min yoongi #yoongi #suga #jhope #jung hoseok #hoseok #jeon jungkook #hogwarts au #bts #bts squad #bts scenarios #jungkook scenario #jimin scenario

[sadrien]

wanna chat? pt. 15

on ao3 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | 14 | 15

wow has it been A Week

i have two tests in a few hours and i have so many notes left and calc problems and i'm dying so have this!

there are two links in the chapter and i know you're probably like. why would i click those? i mean i wouldn’t trust me either, but i swear they're fine. ignore the first if you'd like, but if you don't click the second you're probably going to be fairly confused? you'll see what i mean

this is extra long because i'm feeling extra procrastinate-y

(sorting hat = nino, cochairman of adrien agreste fanclub = alya, dipshit = adrien, ahHHH = mari)

i'm off to fail. enjoy~

3:23

sorting hat: what the fuck was i thinking were french wed go to beauxbatons oh also @alya akuma attack

cochairman of adrien agreste fanclub: but thats bORING wait what fuCK WHEN I FINALLY DECID E 2 SLEPE

sorting hat: please dont leave the house im too tired

cochairman of adrien agreste fanclub: …. nino what the fuck is thsi akuma

sorting hat: why would i know???

cochairman of adrien agreste fanclub: bc i dont

sorting hat: love that 3 in the morning logic

cochairman of adrien agreste fanclub: all thats on the forums is pics of it stacking cars??????????? @hawkmoth wyd

sorting hat: being a dick probably

cochairman of adrien agreste fanclub: ok tru oooo something new in the inbox of the ladyblog make ur bets now

sorting hat: i say random theory

dipshit: Fanart duh

sorting hat: bro!!! youre up!! <3

cochairman of adrien agreste fanclub: gm marshmallow my love

sorting hat: howd you wake up? did the akuma get close to your house and finally make noise or osmething?

dipshit: Oh I never went to bed

sorting hat: …

cochairman of adrien agreste fanclub: what the SHI T SLEEP BOI

dipshit: Trust me, I would’ve if I wanted to

sorting hat: mari is the only one of us with any sense

cochairman of adrien agreste fanclub: shes a smart one

dipshit: Yeah Anyway what’s in the inbox

sorting hat: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5VRr9NG7RE0

cochairman of adrien agreste fanclub: thank u bab much appreciated but also ur a nerd anyway its wait waht ths hit hlyk fucik

sorting hat: uhhhh alya you ok??

cochairman of adrien agreste fanclub: i S HTIS  AK JOKE IMS TCARED TO CPIICK IT

dipshit: Well what is it??

cochairman of adrien agreste fanclub: IS T A FICKUING VIDOE WITH CHANT OIRS  FACE AS THE THUMBLNAIL FIFS:DKLFJ:SDLKFJQWIUE:C:KJGK:SJ

sorting hat: wait like like he shot it himself??

dipshit: That’s some dedication is it like mid-akuma fight or something

cochairman of adrien agreste fanclub: ahhhHHH I DON TKNOW I HAVNE TWATCHED IT YET its itS THE M TEHY METION ME MOM HOL Y FCUK i can t;breakt h im oginna die nsow WAITN I NEDD TO POST

sorting hat: please dont die on us yo send me the link fam

cochairman of adrien agreste fanclub: DINOSUAR SCREEEECH  

dipshit: Did you mean pterodactyl screech

cochairman of adrien agreste fanclub: DO U THISNK I CAN SPELL THAT NR

dipshit: Honestly I didn’t even spell it right I had to use spellcheck

sorting hat: smh fake fan i bet you cant even name ten dinosaurs

dipshit: Do you want me to try???

sorting hat: no no i do not not right now maybe after school

dipshit: Does spelling count

sorting hat: yup scientific names only too bro no long neck bullshit

cochairman of adrien agreste fanclub: ladyblog.tumblr.com/post/324367743289/update-from-the-favs ICAHT STOP YELLING IM SO GETITN G INTORUBLE FOR BEIGS O LOUD BUT HOLY SHI T

sorting hat: dang they look exhaust ed and that akuma really is just stacking cars

cochairman of adrien agreste fanclub: i need a flashing gif thatj us tsays LADYNOIR IS CANON

sorting hat: bro thi s is so accurate to staying up until 3 am tho

cochairman of adrien agreste fanclub: HE CALLED HER PERFEC T

dipshit: Missed pun opportunity Could’ve said purrfect

sorting hat: im kicking you out

cochairman of adrien agreste fanclub: MARHSMALLOW I LIVOE U also i think theyr right about it being a kid

sorting hat: but like lb said its really late

cochairman of adrien agreste fanclub: i mean tru

sorting hat: it looks like theyre building a castel or somethng

cochairman of adrien agreste fanclub: a fortress!!!

sorting hat: yeah!!!

cochairman of adrien agreste fanclub: to protect them from d r a g o n s or scary things

sorting hat: yo it couldve just been a kid with a nightmare if you by that

cochairman of adrien agreste fanclub: god whne the girls have a nightmare its ROUGH sometiems nothing will get them back to bed cant blame them i mean one of  the things that helps them is drwing nightmares fuk i woudlnt want to go back to sleep either

dipshit: The akumas building a fortress huh?

sorting hat: idk man we arent talking to the akuma ask chat

cochairman of adrien agreste fanclub: oh yeah no that failed

sorting hat: ????

cochairman of adrien agreste fanclub: he tried to talk to them and they just like picked him up and threw him away some1 submitted a video rip chat noir

dipshit: Sounds painful

sorting hat: rip in pepperoni anyway if you look at the akuma theyre sorta dressed up ya know

cochairman of adrien agreste fanclub: i wanna say ur projecting the castle thing but ur right that thing in their hair looks like a crown

dipshit: Huh you’re right

sorting hat: man i need to sleep akumas are bullshit

cochairman of adrien agreste fanclub: i just watche dthe video for the sixth itm e im gnna memorize it

sorting hat: babe please if youre gonna memorize something you should wait for a better vidoe

cochairman of adrien agreste fanclub: DO U THINK THEYLLY SEND A NOTHER

sorting hat: idk why not they sent thsi one

cochairman of adrien agreste fanclub: !!!!!!!!!!!!!!! SHIT FAM oh snap here come the amgic ladybugs there the y go ayyyy

sorting hat: sleep

cochairman of adrien agreste fanclub: ok godo plan see u in a few hours 2 cry

PM between dipshit and ahHHH

ahHHH: I cannot bleieve you used our friends to stop an akuma

dipshit: Can you please let me live

ahHHH: I cant believe you sent taht video to alya

dipshit: Did you see how happy she was?????

ahHHH: Oh my god Im going to bed Please actually sleep???

dipshit: Uhh No promises but I’ll try my best

ahHHH: You better Night kittne

dipshit: See you in a few hours Night bugaboo

7:58 in hogwarts house discourse

sorting hat: i want to die

cochairman of adrien agreste fanclub has changed their name to ladynoir keeps me living

ladynoir keeps me living renamed this conversation to “life is meaningless”.

dipshit: Optimistic

ahHHH: Fuck m y life and efverythign in it

  16:03

ladynoir keeps me living has renamed this conversation to “what the fUCK”.

ladynoir keeps me living: what the fuc k what thif cuk what teh kcuk WHAT THE ICUK NINO

sorting hat: babe im standing right next to you im processing gimme a fucking second

ladynoir keeps me living: ... 

sorting hat: ok i had a second what

ladynoir keeps me living: whaT ETH FCUK YOU TWO REPSOND YOU FUCKERS BOLTED WHAT HTE UC K

PM between ladynoir keeps me living and ahHHH

ladynoir keeps me living: MARINETTE DUPAIN CHENG WHAT THE FUC K MARI!!!!!!!!!!! ANSWER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

PM between ladynoir keeps me living and dipshit

ladynoir keeps me living: answer uR GODDAMN PHON E I M GODING HUNT U DOWN I F U DONT RESPJNOD  

PM between sorting hat and dipshit

sorting hat: did i just see what i htink i saw correction did alya and i see what we think i saw bro adrien agreste are you here hellllooooooo shit dude

PM between sorting hat and ahHHH

sorting hat: dude dude what was that how long has that been a thing broski marinette goddammit guys

PM between ahHHH and dipshit

dipshit: Uh I’m really sorry about that It just Happened

ahHHH: Its fine Youre fine Its fine Were all fine

dipshit: Are they…?

ahHHH: Yup I have So many messages Oh my go d

dipshit: I’m so sorry

ahHHH: Its both our faults or something

dipshit: You want Alya or Nino

ahHHH: Uh lets do this the simplest way you go nino i go alya Good luck

dipshit: Same to you

PM between ladynoir keeps me living and ahHHH

ahHHH: What

ladynoir keeps me living: ok deep breaths do not what me i saw that nino saw that you lived it

ahHHH: lived what

ladynoir keeps me living: U JUST KISSED ADRIEN AGREST E

ahHHH: um

PM between sorting hat and dipshit

dipshit: Hey Nino What’s up

sorting hat: ha ha very funny alyas having a cow but seriously did you and marinette kiss

dipshit: Uhh I mean yes Yes we did There was lip touching going on there It was an accident

PM between ladynoir keeps me living and ahHHH

ahHHH: It was an accident!!!!

ladynoir keeps me living: an aCCIDENT

ahHHH: Were both really tired and we were standing next to each otehr and idont know what happened

ladynoir keeps me living: what did u fall asleep on each others lips or something?!??!??!?!?!? accident?!??????

PM between sorting hat and dipshit

sorting hat: an accident

dipshit: I kind of Wasn’t thinking

sorting hat: really fucknig smooth bro

dipshit: Sue me

sorting hat: no thank s are you two dating now or?

dipshit: No we’re not

sorting hat: but you like marinette before you say no please know i just saw you lock lips and i also am your best friend and also have eyes

dipshit: Ok yes I like her

sorting hat: so are you gonna ask her out

dipshit: Uhh ... ...no I don’t think so

sorting hat: bruh why not??

dipshit: It’s complicated

PM between ladynoir keeps me living and ahHHH

ladynoir keeps me living: i hate both of u ur actuallt he worst

ahHHH: Im sorry???

ladynoir keeps me living: MAKE OUT ALREADY

ahHHH: Alya stop!!!!! We arent dating or anyhting

ladynoir keeps me going: what hte fUCK why not!!!!! u kissed!!! u 2 talk all the time u make each other laugh u spend a ton of time together u like each other ur dating

ahHHH: Al Im not dating adrien!!!

ladynoir keeps me going: ok fine but u could

ahHHH: By that logic I could also be dating you and nino

ladynoir keeps me going: yes yes u could be

PM between sorting hat and dipshit

sorting hat: complicated??? what about it is complicated?????? you like her she likes you if you havent figured that out by now i dont know what to tell you dude other than maybe all that homeschooling made you worse at social interaction than we thought cause its freaking obvious man like really really obvious

dipshit: It really is complicated, I swear

sorting hat: what?? do you like someone else too or something?

dipshit: Yeah Actually I do

sorting hat: who? ladybug still?? i mean same ladybug is fucking awesome and ive been in a room with teh two of you chemistry and awkwardness but like dont take this the wrong way dude but what are your chances? im not gonna pull an alya and say lb and cn are a thing but how well would dating a superhero really work out? you like mari mari likes you youve already kissed once you guys are so close already might as well just change the relationship status on facebook you know? adrien? ok well think on it dude ill be here if you wanna talk

PM between ladynoir keeps me living and ahHHH

ahHHH: Its not that simple

ladynoir keeps me living: yes it is? do u like him? yes does he like u? yes did u like kissing him? im gonna guess yes is it the asking out part ur scared of cause i can totally bug him into asking u out first

ahHHH: No its not that its just I Its kinda complicated

ladynoir keeps me living: ??????

ahHHH: I cant really

ladynoir keeps me living: mari u ok?? do u need me to come over cause i can

ahHHH: No its ok Im fine

ladynoir keeps me living: did adrien do smth do i need to beat him up

ahHHH: No! No its not him Adrien is perfect

ladynoir keeps me living: sap

ahHHH: Just Give me a minute Ok?

ladynoir keeps me living: ill wait for u to text first

ahHHH: Thanks

PM between dipshit and ahHHH

dipshit: So

ahHHH: So

dipshit: That happened

ahHHH: Yup

dipshit: Nino asked if we were dating

ahHHH: Alya did too

dipshit: Mari I like you a lot

ahHHH: And I really like you too But theres a but right?

dipshit: Yeah You too?

ahHHH: Yeah

dipshit: I think we should just Wait? A little bit?

ahHHH: I was thinking the same thing Not necessarily a long time just Some Time

dipshit: Exactly I mean I’ve been in love with you for months honestly But there’s…

ahHHH: Same here I’ve had a huge embarrassing crush on you since the beginning of the year

dipshit: Glad we’re the same level of awkward and embarrassing

ahHHH: That wasnt our first kiss By the way Just Thought you should Probably know at this point

dipshit: Wait what?

ahHHH: Dark Cupid? You um I needed to break his hold on you and I remembered class and there had been something about a kis sbreaking a spell so Yeah You didnt remember so I didnt say anything Maybe I shouldve I jsut felt Really awkward about it??? Sorry

dipshit: Oh Um

ahHHH: IM REALLY REALLY SORRY

dipshit: It’s fine!!! Really it’s fine It sounds like it’d be awkward to bring up But thanks for telling me I appreciate it

ahHHH: Of course Um Im gonna do some homeowrk so I can go to bed early tonight Hopefully Hawkmoth will leave us alone

dipshit: Oh god I hope so I can’t do another late night That was terrible

ahHHH: That video was awful But it was fun You might sway me on this social media thing yet kitty

dipshit: :3c

ahHHH: Youre the w o r s t

dipshit: I know Let me know if you have any problems with chem or physics I did the homework while she was going over the stuff from yesterday

ahHHH: Its unfair how smart you are

dipshit: Promise you’ll ask for help??

ahHHH: Yeah I promise Dont you have piano today?

dipshit: Yup and I should probably go get ready for that Good luck my lady

ahHHH: You too kitten

#adrien agreste #marinette dupain cheng #alya cesaire #nino lahiffe #wanna chat #my fics #k so everyones gonna get the wrong idea about this buT ITS FINE

[delctrl-archive]

*MUSIC SYMBOL THO*

♫ – five times my muse swears it’s nota date and the one time it maybe is.— @sycophanticvisionary​

1. CINEMA

      “Just pick one.”

      “I don’t know? I’m still thinking.”

      “Look, it’s not that hard. You’re over-complicating it.”

       “I’m just not sure.”

      “Ryan, if you don’t choose, I’m going to choose for you.”

      “All right, all right, gimme a minute, will you?!”

Easy for Joe to say; these are his selections. After process of elimination, the remaining films limit two in the same genre: Goodfellas or The Godfather III. Why is he not surprised this is something Joe likes? Ryan’s never been into gangster movies himself—someone has to force him to watch the first Godfather actually—so maybe he’s stalling on purpose, even though the line behind him is getting antsy.

      “Sir, you need to make your choice soon. You’re holding up the line,” the box office clerk wheedles impatiently.

He wants to reject both options, if only because Ryan really wants to see Total Recall, but Joe isn’t a Schwarzenegger fan [how is that even possible? He’s amazing as Conan the barbarian]. Part of him wants to see Edward Scissorhands because that’s a unique concept and Nightmare Before Christmas is bizarre in a good way, even if as a kid Ryan finds it scary. But whatever, he has to decide, otherwise not only will people be pissed, Joe will probably walk out on him.

      “Two for The Godfather.” It takes all his willpower not to sigh.

Glancing at Joe, the small smile on his lips tells Ryan he chooses well. That makes him smile in turn as they head to the snack bar.

      “What do you want to eat?” he hears Joe ask, though he shrugs.

      “You decide. I’m pretty cheap.”

Joe doesn’t argue, just orders them a combo popcorn and fishes for his wallet. It occurs to Ryan that Joe’s paying for everything and that makes his face hot with embarrassment. Does that mean—?

      “Is this a date?” Ryan blurts.

It stills Joe from handing over a twenty-dollar bill, his eyes slowly sliding towards Ryan. Ryan swallows nervously, staring back with what he doesn’t realize is anticipated hope.

      “No.”

Joe turns away to gather napkins as Ryan stands, deflated, watching. He doesn’t enjoy the movie as much as Joe does.

2. BOWLING ALLEY

Ryan’s probably never laughed as much as he had since getting out of prison, but witnessing someone as tall as Joe MacMillan try to toss a giant heavy ball down a laminated aisle and miss is ridiculously priceless. More than likely Joe doesn’t appreciate being the butt of the joke, but can’t say he doesn’t laugh either whenever Ryan misses a strike out—which isn’t a lot. He practically grows up on this game thanks to his dad’s company team. Ryan knows how to roll a ball before he knows keystrokes.

So, yes, it’s a little unfair he asks Joe to verse him, knowing the advantage he has, but it feels nice to be good at something again, especially against Joe MacMillan, a man who is seemly flawless at what he puts his mind to, regardless of skill level. [Ryan has seen the man’s code, and while it’s like looking at the aftermath of a wild keg party, there’s still some gold nuggets that can make a decent brewery. He may never be great at it, but he’s not unteachable.] When they decide to pause in Joe’s losing streak—he laughs again at the typical-wounded-ego pout on his face—they stop for a pizza break. Ryan carries a tray over with their huge slices and styrofoam soda cups; the one with the hot-pink crazy-straw indicates Ryan’s Dr. Pepper and the cup with lots of ice is Joe’s Coke. The fries they split. Ryan dunks his in too much ketchup, makes a mess of his shirt, and Joe just looks at him with fond exasperation when he gets more napkins.

      “Do you still think you’re capable of beating me?” Ryan taunts through a grin and half a mouthful of pizza. “I mean, I gotta admit, you got spunk. Don’t think that’s good enough though.”

Joe scoffs goodnaturedly. “You’re sure of yourself. Don’t get cocky, Ryan—”

      “Too late!”

      “―You might be surprised. I could suddenly win this and you wouldn’t even see it coming.” Joe’s steady, self-assured voice causes doubt in any other situation but this one. Ryan’s heard it a few times when they’ve spent hours and days looking for something before finding NSFNet. That tone marks the man’s determination as well as an ace hidden up his sleeve.

Not that Ryan heeds it. There’s no way Joe can turn this around in time. There’s a little over thirty minutes of the game left and Ryan’s ahead by twenty-two. He stuffs the rest of his cheese pizza in his mouth, devours it, and slurps down more Dr. Pepper, shaking his head. “That doesn’t scare me, Joe. You’re all talk.” Ryan smirks. “C’mon, prove it.”

He’s not exactly prepared for that look Joe gives. Like he’s said the wrong thing, or maybe the right thing, to put that fire in his gaze; the way he stands so abruptly just screams You’ll regret that. Ryan watches a little dumbfounded as Joe steps into the little sitting area, food forgotten, then takes a minute to peruse particular bowling balls. He ends up choosing a shiny black one, as if it’s an enlarged 8-ball. It’s a surprise when Joe walks up, stands perfectly still, but suddenly executes a perfect throw with just the right amount of leverage and twist that sends the ball gliding across the lane, knocking down the white pins forming a Greek Church. 

For a dumb moment, Ryan has the impression of pillars of an old god’s temple being destroyed by Joe MacMillan: a cannon ball come to wreck a false way of life.

The next half hour plays out similarly. Joe keeps nailing his shots over and over until he’s caught up to Ryan, who hasn’t said a word to joke or laugh at Joe’s expense. He realizes how easily he’s been played, that Joe is going easy on him earlier, and that miffs him the slightest bit. But in the end it’s Ryan who wins; as good as Joe apparently is at bowling, Ryan’s better.

       “That was fun,” Joe announces on the drive home. “We should do it again sometime.”

       “Yeah, sure,” Ryan answers, distracted, with his attention out of the window. He may still be a little bitter at how Joe played him. So he isn’t expecting the hand on his arm that gains his attention on the man driving instead.

       “Hey, you okay?”

The concern in Joe’s words melt whatever ire builds. Coupled with that glance of caring worry behind horn-rimmed glasses, Ryan simply smiles and shrugs it off. “Yeah, I’m good, I’m good. We’re good.”

Joe smiles, small and delicate, and nods. “Good. Let’s play again sometime,” he encourages.

       “It’s a date,” Ryan agrees mindlessly. 

Joe’s smile doesn’t waver, but his eyes close off. He looks back at the road ahead, stepping on the pedal once the light turns green.

3. PARTY

Ryan’s two hours deep in Mortal Kombat, the joystick of his Nintendo 64 in danger of snapping from how vigorously he jerks it left and right, but he can’t care about that now, so close to K.O.-ing a FATALITY on Rain’s flamboyant, Japanese-purple-poncho, black death mask wearing ass. Ryan didn’t unlock Smoke as a character just to have him look pretty with his long white hair and mysticism. He’s been glued to the console ever since he buys it for himself as an early birthday present. Not even his brand new Microsoft PC has steered him from fighting fictional assassins and ninjas designed by America’s greatest video game developers. 

It’s Joe’s fault anyway.

“Fault” as if Ryan’s mad—hardly. The day Joe hands this gem over in neat red wrapping paper, Ryan swears he falls in love. After replaying [and beating] Super Mario five times, he’s in need of something new; Joe delivers.

Speaking of Joe, a shrill ringing interrupts his gameplay in time for Smoke to land the finishing blow. “Yes!” Ryan praises, leaping up with arms shooting high the same moment Smoke does a victory taunt. Adrenaline plants a wide grin on his lips and he pats the wall for his phone blindly, but eventually grasps it. “Hello?” he breathes, not quite over his excitement.

       “Ryan? It’s Joe.”

        “Joe? Hey, man, perfect timing! I just killed it on Mortal Kombat!”

        “Mortal Kombat?” Joe is genuinely confused. Figures.

       “Yeah, Mortal Kombat, it’s that game you bought me a few weeks ago. For my birthday,” he tacks on just in case he really has forgotten.

       “Right, I remember. I’m glad to know you’re liking it so much. Listen, can you do me a favor? I wouldn’t ask if I had somebody else, but—”

       “What is it, Joe? It’s not like you to stall.”

There’s a pause, and Ryan imagines Joe’s debating telling him never mind and hanging up, but he’s happy he doesn’t. “There’s this thing I have to go to for Gordon. Business party. A lot of investors will be there—I need someone to come with me.”

       “Like a date?”

       “No, nothing like that. It looks bad if I go alone.” Joe is too quick to dismiss the idea, but what else is new. It no longer hurts Ryan’s feelings.

But he does chuckle to hide his scoff. “You don’t think showing up with a guy will look bad?” Ryan points out incredulously. He realizes how bad that sounds though. “Not that I have a problem with it, just—”

       “Will you go with me or not?” Joe demands sharply, his voice like a cold knife.

       “Sure, yeah, yeah, I’ll go. Sure. Look, I’m sorry if I—”

       “Great. I’ll pick you up a six o’clock. Wear something nice.”

The line goes dead. Ryan feels like shit for putting his foot in his mouth and he knows he’s going to make it up to Joe somehow. Over the years the guy’s gotten a little more sensitive about his sexuality, the AIDS epidemic startling him into awareness and caution. Of course Joe’s never taken lightly to cracks about the gay community. Sometimes he can be downright vicious defending it.

Before Ryan has long to mope about his carelessness, he checks the clock. It’s four minutes from 5:00 PM and Joe doesn’t live far. Whatever remorse Ryan feels gets replaced by panicked annoyance at classic Joe MacMillan expecting him to break his neck getting ready in a small window of time. Ryan flicks off his television, then hops over his couch to rush down the hall towards his bedroom, shirking clothes as he goes.

He’s proud of himself when he opens the door to Joe exactly at 6:00, dressed in a starch white button-up, open maroon blazer, and black slacks. The contrast of deep red truly makes his skin glow copper. The way Joe looks him up and down slowly only adds to Ryan’s conceit. It doesn’t even diminish when Joe reaches forward to fix his black bowtie before half-smiling at Ryan. They’ll make quite the pair: Joe also looks dapper in his silver-white three-piece suit, his skin freshly scrubbed clean to give a polished peach gleam. Ryan forgets all about how much he hates parties and whether Joe admits it or not, he tries not to focus on the fact it feels very much like a date.

Ryan pretends Joe doesn’t.

4. COASTLINE

Joe invites Ryan out to the water with him. He tries to teach him to surf. It’s the first and last time he tries as they learn Ryan is stupendously awful at keeping his balance on a surfboard while the waves are rocking. He probably swallows more sea water than is healthy, but at least he coughs up some of it.

On shore Joe hands Ryan a towel that he gratefully accepts, rubbing his messy soaked hair after he’s squeezed out excessive water onto the sand dampening beneath his bum. These wetsuits make Ryan uncomfortable, a little more conservative about the skin-tight fabric than he’d like to be. He wishes he can be like Joe, who struts around in his wetsuit like he’s born to model them, or even something as simple as rolling the top half of it down, scars on display, just to lay on a towel while the sun warms them both. Joe looks mighty comfortable lounging on his back, hands atop his stomach, while Ryan imitates a drowned cat vigorously trying to groom himself. Instead of his tongue he’s got a terry cloth that’s mostly drenched—not much good for drying anymore.

       “I think I’ll leave it to you from now on to be the surfing expert,” Ryan grouses, drawing his knees up to his chest and hugging himself. It’s a silly attempt to heat up faster, but he’ll take what he can get.

Laughing, Joe peeks a bright eye at Ryan. “Come on, you weren’t that bad.”

Ryan snorts, tossing Joe a look as if he’s crazy. “I got booed by a water skier passing by us. I sucked, let’s face it.”

       “They were kind of assholes,” Joe argues mildly.

       “Those assholes weren’t wrong though,” Ryan insists.

Humming, Joe’s quiet for a second as he thinks it over. He comes to a decision shortly. “I suppose you’re right. You were pretty bad.”

Ryan sits up straighter, raising his chin, and affects a haughty air. “Thank you.”

It makes Joe laugh like he intends, yet they both go quiet afterwards. Joe tips onto his side, eyes closed, the corners of his mouth faintly curl up, Ryan staring at him for a second too long. He doesn’t want to say what this feels like—out loud—for fear of Joe shooting the idea down. Rather than humiliate himself more, Ryan bunkers down next to Joe, a respectable amount of space between them without seeming too intimate nor too distant. He tucks his hands behind his head, well on his way to relaxed. Ryan will just keep it to himself how he considers this outing to be a date as well.

5. ARCADE

Ryan has a hard time believing Joe’s never gone to an arcade to actually play on one of the machines. He knows that’s where he and Cameron almost hooked up and where he recruited her, so it possibly has a sour taste in his mouth, but he chooses a different hotspot—plus, it’s not like Joe’s life revolves around a timeline of B.C. and A.C.: “Before Cameron” and “After Cameron.” At least he hopes not. Sometimes when she’s brought up he gets this erstwhile look, one of whimsical nostalgia, but mostly wistful remembrance. Ryan has been trying since the day Joe offers home and heart to him to help remedy that ache, but it may be impossible.

The most he can do is subdue it, except admittedly this isn’t one of his better suggestions for a date. 

       No, not date: hangout.

Now Ryan feels bad. “We can go somewhere else if this if this is too weird for you.”

It’s not a shocker that he’s barely able to finish his sentence before Joe turns on his heel and heads back for the car. Ryan jogs after to keep up, but does give some space. Joe seems a little angry, which is probably better than his sadness. Ryan doesn’t know what to do with sad. Anger? That’s easy.

       “Sorry.”

        “Don’t.”

The ride to Joe’s place is thick with silence. Ryan doesn’t try to talk again, nor after they get inside and Joe handles him a little too roughly when he steers Ryan towards his closed bedroom. In the morning Ryan may have bruises from how tightly Joe holds Ryan’s wrists down or how hard he sinks his teeth in Ryan’s shoulder and he knows for certain he’ll be a little sore sitting because he asks Joe not to hold back [“Just fuck me, Joe. I can handle it.”] and that’s all Joe needs to let himself go and not treat Ryan like some breakable china doll.

In the morning Joe asks Ryan to leave and Ryan does without argument. A couple days later he calls to apologize, regardless if he’s not sure what he’s apologizing for, but Joe accepts it and Ryan feels lighter. Unfortunately they’re both busy after that.

1. DINNER

Obviously he can still be surprised. “You cook?”

Clearly there’s food set out on the table that definitely isn’t store-bought frozen meals or nearby takeout. There’s some flavored rice, what he thinks is cut-up baked fish mixed with vegetables, and  cheesy broccoli. A bottle of sweet red wine even stands between two glasses.

       “Yes, I can cook. Why do you sound so surprised?” Joe’s a bit insulted.

Ryan ignores it as he peels off his coat. “’Cause I mean, you’re Joe MacMillan! Cooking is so… mundane.” That makes him sound like a douche, doesn’t it? “It’s just—you didn’t strike me as the type to like that sort of thing.”

Joe eyes Ryan critically, his hard stare skeptical, like he may have made a mistake. “You’re right. I don’t really enjoy it. But I thought…” He looks across the set table and examines the placement and food choice subconsciously, his hands on the back of a chair. His fingers tighten nervously. “I thought you might like it.”

       “Oh, I do! I really do, you just caught me off guard, is all.” He’s quick to reassure that Joe doesn’t waste his time with this gesture. “This looks great, thanks, man.” Grinning, Ryan moves to take a seat, but is moderately amused when Joe pulls out his chair. Ryan doesn’t comment, simply lowers himself gingerly into the seat, eyes on Joe, full of unasked questions.

He follows suit while he reaches for his napkin and places it on his person properly, treating his dining room as a five-star restaurant. When he looks up at his guest, Ryan scrambles to do the same after a delayed second. 

Joe smiles. “I thought we could try a proper date.”

        “A date?” Ryan must have misheard.

        “A date,” Joe confirms.

Nope, he hears correctly. He’s not sure what to think. “So this is a date then?” he repeats dumbly. It’s hard to believe after Joe denies all the other not-dates they’ve had.

       “If you want it to be,” Joe murmurs, peering at Ryan, fixated. He holds his breath.

Understanding how serious this is, Ryan slowly smiles and he notices the tense line of Joe’s shoulders relax as he breathes. “I want it to be. I do, I really do.”

#sycophanticvisionary #.meme { style: drabble; } #{ i will go down with this ship } #{ macray make me macray } #{ also i did the opposite muse saying it wasn't a date 'cause it seems more a joe thing than a ryan thing tbh } #{ hopefully i wrote joe in character. x_x he's a tough one }