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midmourn · 3 months

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play the part

PAIRING Lee Donghyuck/Haechan/GN!Reader/Na Jaemin

SUMMARY Haechan’s your boyfriend, but Jaemin’s your best friend. How could he ever compete?

GENRE Angst

CONTENTS Brief mentions of (almost) vomiting, I think the phrase is called emotional cheating, alcohol use, surprise sad ending

WORDS 1,428

LISTENING TO that way by tate mcrae, traitor by olivia rodrigo, high infidelity by taylor swift

NOTE im not writing a part two so please don’t ask, thank you <3 i found this in my google docs so i tweaked it just a tiny bit and i couldn’t find it on my old blog so idk if i ever posted it or not

When Mark finds Haechan, the younger boy is still nursing the drink that he had received from Jaehyun when they first stepped inside the party. “Woah,” he tries to joke, already knowing how his best friend was feeling, “Still drinking that drink? You’d usually be in your fifth one by now. Finally decided to take AA seriously?”

Haechan doesn’t laugh, and Mark’s smile fades, sighing as his shoulders slump. Mark downs the rest of his own drink before setting it aside, not wanting it anymore. Haechan doesn’t look up when Mark sits beside him on the railing of the balcony, “You know, it’s probably not safe for us to be this close to the edge while drinking,” Mark gestures to the ground beneath them.

“I feel like death would be better than life right now,” Haechan murmurs, and even those the words could be taken as a joke, both of them know it’s not. And Mark has a pretty good idea on why that is. Mark follows to where Haechan’s gaze is, finding a group of people sitting around the pool in Jaehyun’s backyard, but Haechan’s eyes were only on two people— a familiar head full of of black and a familiar face.

Jaemin’s arm was thrown around your shoulders, the back of his head facing Mark and Haechan but your face was clear for Haechan to see. The grin on your face was so bright that even Mark’s eyes hurt. He wasn’t close enough to be able to see, but if he was, he was sure that he would’ve been able to see the stars decorating your eyes. Mark remembers when you and Haechan first met, the younger would not shut up about you. Mark knows things about you that he shouldn’t, and that’s because of him.

“They’re just friends,” Mark says, swallowing the lump in his throat for he can’t swallow the empathy swelling up inside of him— knowing exactly how his best friend feels. “You’re their boyfriend.”

“I have the title,” Haechan sighs, tilting his head up to drag his eyes away from the two of you. His glistening eyes stare up at the dark sky, clouds decorating the sky and moving to cover the moon. “But he has their heart.”

“If they had feelings for him, they would break up with you, Hyuck,” Mark tries to reassure him, but even Mark doesn’t believe his own words. He wishes he could help more.

“Not if they knew I’d be heartbroken by it,” Haechan swallows the rest of his drink down, welcoming the burning taste. It couldn’t beat the burning in his heart, though.

“Either way, you’re heartbroken,” Mark argues, shaking his head as he turns to face Haechan. “But if you were over, at least you’d be free to move on.”

Haechan doesn’t respond for a moment, only rolling his shoulders as he looks back down at the group of people again. He licks his lips before saying, “I have the title. That’s enough, right?” When Mark doesn’t respond, he exhales through his nose sharply, “I’m their boyfriend. I love them. That should be enough.”

There’s a painful silence before Mark speaks with an underlying tone of hurt, “Sometimes, it isn’t enough.” He’s starting to wish he had another drink. “Hyuck, you’re going to have to do it if they won’t.”

“Guess I’ll just have to play the part, then,” Haechan says suddenly, pushing himself off the railing and onto the balcony floor.

“What part?” Mark asks, eyebrows furrowing as he turns to him.

“Acting like I’m really stupid,” Haechan smiles, but it’s an empty smile. Mark’s not familiar with it— and he hates it. “And that I have no idea that they’re falling in love with their best friend.”

“How was your day?” Haechan asks, his phone laying on his bed with the speaker on. He’s drying his hair with the t-shirt he had on before he took a shower, staring into his mirror in front of his bed. “Have fun?”

“All I did was sleep and play Among Us with Jisung so,” you giggle and his heart swells at the sound, a smile forming on his lips. “Yeah, I did have fun.”

“So you’ll play Among Us with Jisung but not me?” He snarks, throwing his shirt into his dirty clothes hamper but you know he’s joking— he’s always joking like that. “Maybe you should date him instead.”

You giggle again, “Jisung is too young—”

“It’s barely two years,” he sits down on his bed, grabbing his phone to go through his photo gallery, almost every single one being of you. “I’ll even tell him for you, that way if you get rejected—” A small smile is on his lips as he stares down at a picture of you and him, visiting your shared lock at the Love Lock of Namsan Tower.

“Hey!”

“— You don’t have to witness it and ugly cry.”

“In this hypothetical situation, even if he said he liked me back, you’d still tell me he rejected me, wouldn’t you?”

Haechan laughs from surprise, sometimes forgetting just how much you know him, “And you’re right, for once. I’d then tell him the text was for someone else to humble him.”

Your laughter is loud and unapologetic, just how he likes it. “Oh, you are so—” You cut yourself off and it’s silent from your side before you start giggling, “Stop it.” His eyebrows furrow, head tilting as he pauses in his scrolling. What had he done? “No! Don’t be like that and don’t you dare—” You start giggling loudly again, shrieking for whoever to stop what they were doing. If you weren’t laughing, he’d have been concerned.

Haechan says your name once but when it’s not heard over your laughter, he frowns and goes back to the call, seeing that he’s not on mute. He says your name again and when no reply, he goes to say your name once more but a familiar voice stops him. His body freezes as his blood goes cold, staring down at his floor when he recognizes the voice.

No one has a voice like Na Jaemin does. And even if there was, he’d recognize that voice anywhere.

It’s when even after you stop laughing, and you talk to Jaemin like Haechan still isn’t on the phone with you, is when his heart finally drops like an anchor to the bottom of his stomach. You forgot.

They forgot, they forgot, they forgot, his mind chants back at him.

Haechan doesn’t register when your voice first cuts off, only looking down when he realizes and seeing that the call ended. He doesn’t remember if he ended it or if you remembered and did it yourself. Either way, his heart still hurts. Tears stream down his face as sobs rip out of his chest, with loud, violent sounds. His chest hurts, too. His chest is tightening, and coughs start to cough, each cough getting more violent than the next. He doesn’t know if it’s because of the harsh crying or—

He turns to find a water bottle for him to drink but his vision is blurry from crying and the coughing won’t stop, no matter how much he tries to breathe and calm himself down. The crying doesn’t stop, either. He has a feeling he’s about to throw up and pushes himself off his bed, stumbling to his bathroom with his hands on the walls and door frame so he won’t fall.

It doesn’t work, and he falls on his knees anyway. In only a matter of a few minutes, he’s soaked to the bone and his shirt is wet— his previously dry hair is clinging to his forehead and neck. Bile— he thinks— crawls up his throat and he throws himself to where he knows the toilet is, clinging onto the bathroom sink as it comes up and into the toilet.

He doesn’t know how long it’s been when he finally comes around, dried tear streaks on his cheeks and his vision is no longer blurry. His breathing is still heavy, but it’s slow and ragged. He’s not coughing or crying anymore. He can’t help but look in the toilet, not even knowing if he really threw up or if it was just his imagination. His breath catches in his throat, the sight of a familiar singular flower floating in the otherwise empty toilet. A light pink Orchid, your favorite flowers. He knows because he gave them to you on your first date.

Haechan isn’t stupid— and the flower only confirms his thoughts.

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youfreakinturltle · 1 year

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Protect You Pt. 3

(A/N): Okay friends! This is potentially the final part to this series! If y’all would like a part 4 please let me know! I was sorta maybe possibly thinking of a slightly smutty part 4 buuuut idk yet, y’all let me know! There is a slight Skyrim reference so iykyk lol!

Pairing: Colby Brock x ghost!fem!reader

Warnings: you know how it be, some language, mentions of death, mentions of reincarnation, food mentioned, superstition, like one sentence that mentions prostitution (reader’s mother on Nassau), I think that’s it, if I missed anything let me know!

It had now been 2 years since you attached yourself to Colby and started going on adventures with him and his friends. Everywhere he went, you were right beside him, keeping him safe from entities and people alike. While they were still scared during some of these adventures, they were far more comfortable knowing you were there. Especially Colby, who you had grown quite close with during your time together. He had taken to spending every evening once he retired to his room communicating with you. At first it was through writing on the mirror until he decided that wasn’t enough and wanted to actually talk to you.

About a year ago you two had begun talking via the Estes Method with him sitting on his bed, leaving room for you to sit next to him, with headphones and a blindfold on. You told him many tales about your life, all the way from growing up on Nassau with your mother to your final hunt, The Urca de Lima. You once even told him about a flashback you’d had to your childhood one day that made you finally realize who exactly your father was - none other than Captain Hornigold himself. He could faintly make out the sound of you crying telling him this, making his heart break realizing just how upset you were. That was the only time where you two had been able to touch by Colby reaching out to you. He was so hurt from hearing you so sad, he unthinkingly reached his hand out to place it on top of yours. By some miracle, he did indeed touch your hand. It was a quick, fleeting feeling, but it meant the world to the both of you. You, who hadn’t felt a person’s touch in centuries, and he, who was beginning to feel his heart ache from being so close to you, but never being able to see or touch you. That was about six months ago now.

Since that day you slowly began to realize that you were no longer simply here to protect him, which was still highly important to you, but you were beginning to feel things you hadn’t since you died. The last time you felt this way was for none other than John Silver, the man who stole Captain Flint’s Urca de Lima map and somehow became one of The Walrus’ most valued crew members. You were beginning to fall in love with Colby. While it filled you with joy to spend every day with him, keeping him safe, it also broke your heart to know you could never truly be with him. And sitting in the back of your mind was knowing that he could never possibly feel that way about a ghost.

One day the two of you were sitting in the living room with Sam, Jake, and Corey, watching a show you learned was called “Family Guy”. Next to you, Colby kept an earbud in that was connected to the spirit box in his pocket so you could talk to him any time you wanted. All you had to do was give him a tap on the arm and he would reach into his pocket and turn it on. After about the fifth time of this, the others began to notice.

“What are you doing man, getting the scores for the game or something?” asked Corey.

Colby laughed and tried to wave him off, but it seemed the guys were on a roll.

“Or are you maybe talking to (Y/N) again?” asked Jake with a cheeky grin.

“And what if I were? That a problem?” Colby asked with a laugh.

“Nah, no problem, just starting to think you might have a crush.” The guys began laughing while Colby glanced in your direction.

“Ha ha, very funny guys, stop before you make her uncomfortable.”

You were beginning to squirm, hoping Colby wouldn’t take them too seriously. You weren’t sure if you could handle that quite yet, truth be told, you were just coming to terms with having these feelings at all. Let alone be able to convey that to him yet. Before your thoughts could travel any further you hear Corey say, “Why would that make (Y/N) uncomfortable? I mean unless she has a crush on you too.”

Jake and Corey laugh with each other while Sam scolds them about being inappropriate. Colby begins shifting in his seat like he’s uncomfortable as well. You give him a minute to say something, anything, every second your anxiety growing.

When you start to think he won’t say anything at all, he turns to you and did quite possibly the worst thing he could’ve done, “(Y/N)… do you…?”

Your eyes all but bulge out of your head before you shoot up off the couch and run to Colby’s room, slamming the door shut behind you, praying he would leave you be. You look around the room for a moment and your eyes land on the shelf he had put up for you, filled with things he had gotten for you on his adventures, claiming, “it just doesn’t seem right that this is our room now and it’s only filled with my stuff. You deserve things too.” Thinking back on your times together, you begin to cry, not realizing it until you felt the tears streaming down your face. Behind you, the door opens and closes quietly and without turning around you know exactly who it is.

“I’m so sorry, (Y/N). I didn’t mean to upset you in any way. I’ve got the spirit box on still if you want to talk to me. If you don’t I completely understand. Would you like to be left alone for a while or is it okay if I stay?”

You took a moment to collect yourself and told him he can stay, to come sit with you. Settling in next to each other on the bed, you realized it’d never been this awkward between the two of you. You’d always had this comfortable air together. You just wanted this uneasy feeling to go away. Before you could speak up though, Colby says, “I’m not sure how you feel about this, but I can’t keep it in any longer. (Y/N), I like you. More than I probably should, but I don’t care about what they say or think, I only care about what you think. I know it would never really work between us, but I can’t deny how I feel. I’m falling in love with you, (Y/N). If that makes you uncomfortable please tell me. I just- I couldn’t-“

Whatever he was trying to say was cut off by a little sob. You whipped your head around to look at him and realized he was crying. You reached your hand up to wipe his tears away, momentarily forgetting that you can’t, so instead you opt for cradling his face gently in your hands. He seemed to be able to feel, or at least tell, that you were touching him. Smiling at you, he opened his mouth to speak again before you cut him off.

“I love you too. It scares me, but I do. I don’t know what to do or say, but all I know is that I love you and I would spend the rest of eternity fighting to protect you.”

He is staring at you wide eyed now, his eyes filled with happiness, relief, and an overwhelming amount of love. You almost pull away from the unfamiliarity of it, but decide against it. Leaning forward you rest your forehead against his and close your eyes, reveling in the knowledge that he does share your feelings, it isn’t completely one sided this time. Riding your high of happiness and relief, you hesitantly ask him, “Can I try something…?”

“Of course.”

You slowly lean forward until you gently feel your lips ghosting over his. For a moment, you feel a wave of warmth flow over you before you realize, you can feel him. You can actually feel him! He seems to realize this quickly and taking advantage of the fleeting moment of your corporeality, he kisses you back. You cling to one another as long as you’re able before you feel yourself beginning to fade again.

The airy laugh he lets out matches your own. You’re both so happy you don’t know what to do with yourselves past whispering words of love and affection to one another until Colby eventually falls asleep. Following your nightly routine, you lie down next to him and close your eyes. Even though you can’t actually sleep, it’s nice to feel that little bit of normalcy.

Something about this night is different though. Because one moment you’re laying next to Colby with your hand resting atop his, and the next you’re standing in a dark void. You begin to panic, thinking you’re finally moving on.

“No, no, nonono. This can’t be happening. Not now! Please not now!!”

“Do not worry, my child. I would never do such a thing to you.”

Turning around, you quickly take up a defensive position. You see a woman standing in front of you. She’s tall, beautiful, and dressed in a flowing white dress with her burgundy tresses flowing gracefully past her shoulders.

“Who are you?” You ask, your voice echoing out into the void.

“My name is Mara, goddess of love and compassion. I watched over you through your tragic life. I’m so sorry that all happened to you, my love.”

“So I had an actual goddess watching over me and I still died like that? Regardless of that, it’s been over 300 years now, why are you just now showing up? Do you have any idea how alone I felt all that time?!”

“I know, my child, I know. Again, I’m so sorry. But given my position, there was nothing I could do regarding your death for that is not my domain. But I was able to negotiate with the goddess of death into allowing you reincarnation. You were meant to reincarnate and find John again in your next life if you had passed on as intended. Though it seems I failed to take into account how hard headed you are!” She finished with a twinkling, airy laugh.

“If you’re here to offer me reincarnation now, I’m sorry, but I’m going to have to decline. I like things how they are now. I’m finally happy. I don’t want to leave Colby. He needs me, he needs my protection.”

Mara smiles at you in understanding and continues, “I know, darling. I’m here with a new offer. Become my champion, and you may return to Colby. Not as a spirit, but as a person. Does that sound alright?”

“…and what would becoming your champion entail?”

“Simply doing as you are now. Rid the world of any demons or evil entities you come across. Spread love and compassion to all that you meet. Do this, and you may spend your life with your love.”

You don’t hesitate for a moment before agreeing to her terms. You had already come to terms with the fact that you would do anything for him, to be with him. And like she said, it was already what you were doing. So long as Colby was safe and uninvolved in any divine deal you made, you’d do anything.

Mara smiled at you and pulled you in for a hug. “Should you ever need me, all you need to is ask. I look forward to watching your happiness. I love you dearly, my child.”

You open your eyes to see light shining through the windows and look down at yourself. Not only realizing that you were actually asleep, but you have a body! A tangible, corporeal body! You roll over to see Colby sleeping soundly next to you and reach a hand up to graze his cheek. You’re over the moon feeling his warmth seep into your fingertips. He begins to stir and you contemplate pulling your hand away to allow him more sleep, but decide against it, too excited to see how he would react.

His beautiful blue eyes begin to flutter open and land on you immediately. He lets out a yelp and jumps up into a seated position. Giggling, you look up at his bewildered face as he whispers, “…(Y/N)? How is this possible? Is this real? Am I still dreaming??”

Sitting up, you take his hand in yours and say, “I’m real, Colby. I’m really here. It’s me, (Y/N). It’s a long story, but I swear to you, it’s all true. I’m really here and I’m not disappearing again. I promise.”

As you speak, he seems to believe you and tears begin streaming down his face. Before you can say any more he pulls you into his arms, clinging tightly to you. You wrap your arms around him, taking in the new, yet distantly familiar feeling. You spend the entirety of the day locked away in his room, watching movies and holding onto each other like you would disappear at any moment. He ordered lots of food the moment you two had collected yourself as you both realized you hadn’t eaten in a very long time. To say the least, it was the best day you’d had in centuries.

When you felt yourself starting to get tired, you clung to Colby even tighter, your anxiety seeping back into your mind. Slightly fearful that today hadn’t been real. You feel Colby pull you closer as he reminds you that everything would be okay with a slow, sweet kiss. Smiling, you snuggle in closer to him, feeling if you were any closer you’d be one.

Next thing you know, you’re waking up to your second day back in the physical world. Realizing the day before hadn’t been a dream, you’re over the moon knowing you get to spend the rest of your new life with Colby as his significant other, rather than just his spiritual protector.

#colby brock imagine #colby Brock x reader #sam and colby #colby brock x y/n #Colby Brock x ghost!reader #fan fiction #Colby Brock #pirate!reader #ghost!reader #protect you series

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themarydragon · 11 months

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Trouble the Water Continuation

It will be AWHILE before I have anything written, as I am still working to finish my first playthrough, I have a lot of things happening in my life, I am 75% done with the first draft of the first book of my own original world, and my only coherent thought about TOTK right now is SUFFERING

but

Issues and contemplations below the cut. Some reference to TotK in the fifth paragraph that is spoilery. I tried not to make it explicit, but you have been warned.

First, IDK if you caught it, but the very last chunk of Chapter 2 in Born a Storm talked about sages. Let the record show, I posted that in June of 2020. I have a lot more I had planned for Born a Storm, and stopped writing it due to completely unrelated (cough cough Covid cough cough Loved and Lost) issues. Also, I realized if I was going to turn it into a complete work, like I kinda wanted to, I was either going to have to take it down, or somehow move chapters around as I went and I never actually decided how I wanted to manage that. I am still undecided, and I have to make that decision before my brain will allow me to work on totk in that universe. THE POINT, though, is I thought of a way to tie in sages (just a hundred years too early) that would be satisfying for me to write and not contradict TotK.

Second, SO FAR nothing I’ve found in TotK has completely screwed up my Trouble the Water [TtK] storyline. I’m not FINISHED yet, so that might change, but it really looks like the TotK worldstate is more or less compatible with where I left off in The Quiet River Rages [tQRR] with just a very little bit of handwaving.

Third, YOU CAN’T JUST GIVE ME THIS ANGST AND EXPECT ME NOT TO RUN WITH IT.

Fourth, I feel like I have all the jumping-off points already loaded into the existing work. For example, tQRR, Chapter 5: “I would have waited millennia if that’s what it took to get you back. Link, I chose-” Or Zelda’s gentle commune with the sword from Chapter 12 of CWRD.

Fifth, I want to write two parts. One is [spoilers] Zelda’s POV from-then-until-now just like Remember the Spring, and with the same flavor (and for the same reason). Again, I haven’t FINISHED it, but the Master Sword IS sentient and DOES talk to her, canonically, so it’s NOT EXACTLY ALONE and I don’t think forgetting was allowed, not entirely. The final Tear, which is NOT ancient, but rather we witness being shed, indicates possession of Sense of Self or at least Memory that I am definitely going to run with because angst. The other part is Our Boy desperately searching, finding Tears, and reflecting on how F’d up it is, given Zelda’s canonical parental history (her mother, then Rhoam). I don’t know yet exactly what I will include or exclude, but I’ve been in this place before and I know I have to write about it eventually.

Last, if anybody expected me - ME - to see an amputee kilted tattoo’d protagonist and leave that shit alone, you got another thought coming. My husband has had some REALLY great insight into some of the cinematic moments (Link’s pause before taking Zelda’s hand for the Reverse Time ability) that I think deserve some love.

#totk #do not spoil totk #totk spoilers #fic planning #loz #fic writer #fic writing #my fic #cwrd #trouble the water #calm waters run deep

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moonhoures · 10 months

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📰 𝐈𝐌𝐏𝐎𝐑𝐓𝐀𝐍𝐓 𝐍𝐎𝐓𝐈𝐂𝐄: 𝐔𝐏𝐃𝐀𝐓𝐄𝐒!

literally me rn 👆🏻

anyways, hello my loves! i’m here to give you some updates on where this blog stands and is (hopefully!) going 🤭

first, what the fuck happened? 🫣

it’s been pretty much exactly a year since i dipped from this account (again). i’m sorry about that. i got a little overwhelmed and frankly just didn’t feel motivated or excited to write for a long time. i tried writing a few things (and got a little far tbh) but i just wasn’t satisfied with any of it. i even had a terrible moment or two where i got very close to deleting this account entirely but i decided against it as i’m really proud of some of the things i put out, and i would’ve been really sad to see it go. i also love all of you very much and appreciate everything you guys have done for or said to me, and i would’ve felt really guilty taking this blog away from you guys. so i promise i won’t be doing that any time soon!

second, first love 🥰

i’m sure most of you have seen my teaser for first love part 5 by now (which, yes, will unfortunately be the last part for the series 😓) but!! i have like 1 or 2 small things i plan on posting before hand to keep you guys fed since it won’t be posted for another month or so. i’ve been working on it as much as i can for the past couple months, but i do work basically every day so i can only write so much 🫤 but yeah, that’s how first love is! i’ll explain some more on it when i can!!

third, asks/messages 💬

i’ve gotten so many sweet messages since i went MIA (a little under 40 😭). i’m sorry to keep all of you waiting, but i promise i’ll try to answer them soon! i did get some negative comments about my absence and such, but i won’t be answering any of those publicly. i don’t want to feed into them. i understand i’ve done this multiple times & it’s annoying, and i apologize for that. writing is a big passion of mine (as is interacting with all of you!) but it can get draining running this account sometimes. i’m trying my best, and i appreciate your patience with me. i’m definitely undeserving of it.

fourth, also! ☝🏻

i have decided that from now on i will not be taking requests. as much as i love writing specific stuff that you guys want, it does give me a little anxiety. so i will only be taking very limited requests for drabble games and stuff like that in the future. i hope you guys understand 🫶🏻

i also decided to delete my twitter account (well, it kind of got hacked? i think? idk i had trouble with it and basically can’t get back in and don’t want to create a whole new one) so i wont be answering asks with twitter links anymore for this reason.

fifth, comebacks?! 🤩

i’ve recently tried to catch up on some of the comebacks i missed. txt’s temptation ep, monsta x’s reason ep, enhypen’s dark blood ep, and skz’s 5 star album have been in my rotation lately and i love them!! (duh) so if any of you want to stop by my inbox and fangirl over them with me i’d absolutely love that 🥺👉🏻👈🏻

lastly, a thank you 💌

thanks to all of you that continued to follow me, leave likes/reblogs/comments, and message me while i was gone. you guys truly don’t understand how much your support for me means. like i said, i was close to deleting this account all together, but i decided against it, and it was largely because of you. i decided to keep writing because of you. re-reading all of the precious comments you’ve left me on my older work motivated me and inspired me to continue writing first love which sparked my joy again. so, thank you. i also hope some of you read this and it encourages you to leave love for other writers like myself. you could be the one that changes someone’s entire outlook on their account and keep them going. at the very least, you’ll make their day 💕

also, thank you for 4,000 followers??? um what the fuck??? i’ve never had so many people supporting me, i’m actually losing my marbles rn please help me find them??? (that was such a lame joke, okay i’m going to bed soon 😭🥱 ily bye)

i love you. i love you. i love you. more content is coming soon. promise. 😚💗

#moon’s announcements 📢

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ryanthedemiboy · 3 days

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20 Questions for fic writers

(I was tagged by @annachibi )

Note: i'm combining answers for all three of my pseuds/both accts

1. How many works do you have on AO3? 56 :)

Ana's response: "18, I'm not very prolific haha"

That's so much! iirc the average person has like 2 fics under 3k total!

2. What's your total AO3 word count? 231,440 :D

3. What fandoms do you write for? Right now it's Fullmetal Alchemist. I may or may not go back to Marvel at some point. And I may move on to another fandom at some point :)

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos? Four of the five are from my Ed is Dying series c: #1, 6, 7, 3. The fifth is an HP fic I wrote in 2016.

5. Do you respond to comments? Yes! It's extremely rare that I don't; only if I have nothing to say.

Ana's answer: "Yes, just about every one! Sometimes I don't if it's been multiple years since I wrote the thing and I don't have much to say back, since I figure some people don't necessarily want the author to respond anyway."

I promise you, almost everyone wants the author to respond! And the ones who don't just aren't going to check them xD

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? Oh this is an excellent question. I have to be careful here, because spoilers. The end of the first fic in my spn series ended in a suicide that was unclear that he survived (he did). And then I have the death fic for my Ed is Dying series written, that's angsty af. There's also a fic I wrote recently on my semi-secret AO3 acct that doesn't seem angsty but it really fucking is.

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? Uhhh... I need to go look.

I forget if Out of the Box (MCU non-sexual age regression) had a happy ending, but basically the whole fic was gentle happiness. Same with Cas and the Bee Bag (spn. This is 9 years old)

I do not appear to have any other fics that are happy. Interesting, neutral, enjoyable, positive, sure. Not happy 😂

8. Do you get hate on fics? Not thus far

9. Do you write smut? Sometimes

10. Do you write crossovers? Not usually. It's very rare that I will. The main one I can think of is unpublished, idk if I even have it tbh — I had to write a crossover fic with A Scarlet Letter for my English class in 11th grade. I chose Doctor Who xD I believe that remains the only fic i've written for doctor who.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen? Not that i'm aware of.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated? Nope

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before? Yes! It was a blast. I forget why, but I asked my friend not to list me as a co-author.

14. What's your all-time favorite ship? Riza/Al, I think.

15. What's a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will? My spn series. I am so many levels of uninterested, and even if I did, i'd have to rewrite it from scratch bc it's not up to par, anymore, and is extremely insensitive in parts (in particular, I have Cas using bible pages as the rolling paper for his weed. He is not xian. That's just what I remember off-hand). All that said, i would love to finish it.

16. What are your writing strengths? Emotion. Hitting the reader where it hurts.

17. What are your writing weaknesses? Anything with happiness 😂

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic? I have done it both ways. And both are kind of cringey for me, when i've written them in the past.

Generally, the best way is to use italics to signify another language, and specify that language, as long as the POV person understands it.

19. First fandom you wrote for? HP

20. Favorite fic you've written? Talk about a good question. Probably one of the kink fics i've written. I love how i've had the characters be with each other, and shown their love for each other. I also love some of the drabbles i've made — it's hard to get a fic to exactly a word count, and getting an entire fic in so few words is a massive challenge, and very rewarding.

I'm not going to tag anyone, but if you want to do this, go for it!

Blank questions to easily copy/paste (incl on the app) below.

1. How many works do you have on AO3? 2. What's your total AO3 word count? 3. What fandoms do you write for? 4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos? 5. Do you respond to comments? 6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? 7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? 8. Do you get hate on fics? 9. Do you write smut? 10. Do you write crossovers? 11. Have you ever had a fic stolen? 12. Have you ever had a fic translated? 13. Have you ever co-written a fic before? 14. What's your all-time favorite ship? 15. What's a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will? 16. What are your writing strengths? 17. What are your writing weaknesses? 18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic? 19. First fandom you wrote for? 20. Favorite fic you've written?

#long post

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exitpursuedbyavulcan · 1 year

Note

You had me screaming crying and throwing up in this here day😮‍💨 absolutely magnificent tbh. Absolutely cursed and insane that I cannot see what I’m writing, but here we go

You honestly are so talented at writing and transmitting emotions, I was honest to god tearing up and had to take breaks through Aemonds self deprecating tone and thoughts about himself. Heart wrenching.

You also had me giggling kicking my feet in the air and twirling my hair at his thoughts of reader AND hey! I’m a fifth daughter too! Cheers to that

Anyways, this was amazing, you are amazing and the wait was SOOOO worth it. I loved it. Thank you for sharing with us.

P.S: I’m sorry for any mistakes made in the writing of this? I honestly cannot see shit but I guess that makes it more sincere? In a way? Idk

Hello person who I assume was experiencing the dark mode glitch!

Thank you so much! I am not ashamed to admit that I had to take breaks while writing some of his stuff and rethink all my life choices. My laptop was away for service while I was writing his parts, so I actually wrote almost all of his diary entries in an old journal of my own. I think it really helped, and I'm planning to do the same for the next chapter.

And that's exactly the reaction I was looking for! He's a lovesick puppy and just wants to be petted by his wife, but all he knows how to do is growl at her and bring her dead squirrels...

Hopefully part IV will be soon! Now that I have my laptop back, writing should go quicker!

💜💜💜

#studious #asks

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bucky-barmes · 3 years

Text

☾✧✧✧ I'm just looking for a good night ✧✧✧☽

female enhanced!reader x tfatws!Bucky

In which you get dragged into a mess in Madripoor while just trying to enjoy yourself. But is the infamous Winter Soldier as bad as you always thought?

[ a/n: idk what this exactly is but i don't hate it, and who doesn't love asshole bucky? maybe i just have a problem, also loosely based on that madripoor episode. also also tried something new for the writing style so i hope you don't mind lemme know if it's shit ]

Minka is polish for strong-willed one, and is a name but here it’s used as a nickname as it’s reader insert

[ word count: ~3,580 words (this started as a lil drabble of reader meeting bucky at a bar, but i guess my brain had other ideas)

includes: asshole bucky, swearing - like a lot (i'm aussie okay?), drinking (alcoholism?), it's pretty fkn angsty, asshole bucky (i'm warning you ok), no -18 pls as it's not entirely g rated & has some implications

[ all works are my own, do not steal, repost or translate ]

tagging some friends (message if you wanna be on a perm taglist/if you don't wanna be tagged in future (i won't take it to heart i promise)) @sweetdreamsbuck @beefybuckrrito @mymindslabyrinth @igotnoname4thisblog @theluxuriousfangirl @posinhay @barnesand1

The music was blaring, sending vibrations through her body as she swayed to the fast beat. Drink sloshing around as she waved her arms around her above her head. This was it. This was living. Drunk, surrounded by strangers. No one knew her and she knew no one. She was free. And it was incredible.

Going to clubs alone was dangerous, she couldn't remember the number of times her mother had warned her not to. She must have been rolling in her grave at her daughter not only going to a club alone, but to a club in Madripoor no less. The thrill that anything could happen only exciting her more. That, and knowing that the Powerbroker wouldn't let anything happen to her, wouldn't let anyone lay a finger on her. That was the perk of being enhanced and not looking like it, it made you useful.

She had lost track of the hours, and the drinks, thinking only of how good the music made her feel. Of how nothing had felt this good in so long.

She waded through the sea of people, already locking eyes with the bartender as she made a beeline for the bar. She was stopped in her tracks, however, by a wall of bodies.

An almost animalistic growl ripped through her as she slapped her hand down on the shoulder of the man in the middle, a big fur collar adorning his coat. A hard hand gripped her wrist in response and her eyes shifted slowly from the back of man one to the owner of the hand.

Her eyes widened at who they landed on, then narrowed to barely visible slits. Yanking her hand back she didn't break her glare.

"I'm sorry, Dove, did we cut in?" The voice of the middle man broke her chain of thought, and when she looked back to him, he had turned to face her. "How about we buy you a drink to apologise."

"I don't want your handouts, Baron." Venom dripped from her words as she spat back her response. She wedged herself between the Baron and the third man, not someone she recognised, to snatch the drink the bartender placed out for her. "Besides, I don't pay here anyway, don't want you wasting your money."

She was about to work her way back through the crowd of people and to the middle of the dance floor again when she had a thought.

"Hold the fucking phone." Spinning on the spot, her eyes narrowed again, this time at the Baron, but that didn't stop her from seeing the man to his left step forward defensively.

"How are you even here? Last I heard you were stuck in a prison in Germany." Her drink was down and she slammed the glass down on the bar, getting threateningly close to him as she did. "Thought you were never getting out after what you did to them." Her sentence trailed off as her eyes flicked to the man next to him, the one with the metal arm.

The Baron offered her his signature smug smile. "Some people had other plans."

"Well, whatever you're planning," She closed the gap between them further. The shifting of bodies next to them was halted with a raise of the Baron's hand. "Stay the fuck away from me." Hatred seeped from her whole body.

Snatching the new drink that was placed on the bar, her gaze was turned to the apparent bodyguard.

"And I'd think twice before you lay a hand on me again." There was no response, but a subtle cocky smirk instead that only heated her further. She was gone before any of them could speak another word to her.

She was only able to start enjoying herself once more when the sight of the three men had disappeared, then, she was able to let her guard down and the beat of the music slowly took her over again. Until she got a call.

Plugging her other ear so she could hear, she took mental note of the location she was told to move to. The call ended abruptly, they always did with the Powerbroker, but this one was serious. She had begun picking up on the subtle differences between the calls.

Her gun was pulled from her thigh holster as she advanced towards the room Selby used for meetings.

She listened from a distance, the ability being one of many. A phone rang. An awkward silence as the conversation started. Names were thrown around, first Smiling Tiger. 'Yeah, that guy was definitely not Smiling Tiger', she thought to herself as she listened, remembering her run in with him one time. The phone call ended with a goodbye to "Sam"?

There were gunshot before she had time to process anything further.

Kicking the door down, she stepped through slowly, gun raised. It had fallen silent, the three men stood in the middle of the room.

"Holy fuck, what did you do?" Her voice was a mix of shock and anger. The men snapped their heads up.

"Things didn't exactly go according to plan, Dove." The Baron regretfully shrugged as he looked around at the collection of bodies on the floor, inclusive of Selby's.

"Well, why the fuck am I-" A fifth person joined the room before she could finish.

"Because the Powerbroker requested it." Sharon Carter approached her, stone-faced. “And nobody disobeys the Powerbroker.”

“I don’t know, I might’ve had I know it was for these idiots.” She was dead serious as she said it, glaring at the men responsible for the bodies strewn about.

Sharon shot the other woman a look, a look that said ‘you better cut it out right now’.

"Don't, Minka." Sharon's use of the others' nickname amplified the seriousness of it all.

The men in the room didn’t know it, but she, Minka, was the only one who knew who the Powerbroker really was. And you could say she was somewhat of a bodyguard for them.

“The Powerbroker requested it. End of, so get over it.” Sharon snapped at her.

“I can’t believe you’re helping these people.” Her grip on her gun tightened as she interrogated Sharon. “After everything that happened last time.” Her sentence ended with a scoff, clicking on the safety of her gun. She didn't place it back in her holster just yet though.

“Enough.” Sharon’s remark was a bark. An order. “Whether you like it or not, you’re involved now, you’ve seen the bodies. You’re part of it now.”

Minka just glared at her, mumbling “lucky me” under her breath as her daggers turned to the men again. Her anger only bubbled more when she saw the one with the metal arm, the Winter Soldier, staring right back, something she couldn’t quite pick up on behind his cold eyes.

Many hours and gun fights later, everyone made it Sharon's place alive, much to the acrimony of some of them. Of Minka.

"You have a beautiful place, Miss Carter." Baron was walking around, admiring the art as he made the genuine compliment, but he was being eyed. Sharon's personal guard wasn't about to let him touch, ruin, anything.

"Don't touch anything, and get changed, everyone knows what we're wearing now." The last part was directed at the whole group. "And you look like shit, too." Her nose scrunched as she looked them over. Even her associate was included in the statement.

Sharon watched as her figure retreated to the room she had set up, she was there often enough to warrant her own one, and then directed the men to where they could pick out some clothes and change.

There was a soft thump as her body landed on the bed, and she released a long sigh into the covers.

"Yeah, Sharon, I'm not in the mood." Her voice was mumbled from the bed, but was loud enough to hear the frustration.

"Minka, huh?" That was not the voice of Sharon Carter. Her head snapped up to face the door to her room that she swore she locked.

"You don't get to call me that." If looks could kill, the man in the doorframe would have dropped to the floor in record time.

"Is that not your name, Doll?" Arms folded over his chest, a mix of metal and flesh.

"Is your name The Winter Soldier?" The words were laced with malice as she slid off the bed, moving towards him to push him out of her room, her safe space. "Now if you don't mind getting the fuck away from me."

A heavy boot stopped the door from clicking into place, his metal hand forcing it back open, eyes dark. "No, I don't think I will." He stepped into the room, pushing the door closed behind him. This time it was her that stopped the door from closing, hand gripped tightly on the handle, pulling back.

"You've got some fucking nerve coming here like that." Minka yanked the handle as the soldier pushed the door harder, breaking it clean off. "Coming back into Sharon's life like you aren't the one that fucked it up in the first place." The handle dropped with a loud thud.

For a moment, something flashed through his eyes. Regret? Sadness? Whatever it was lasted a mere second before he regained control.

"So, you're like me?" His gaze dropped to the handle on the ground, taking the opportunity to gaze down her body as he did.

It was all she could do from punching him right then and there. "Absolutely not!" If the venom in her voice wasn't evident before, it definitely was now. "I don't kill innocents."

The tension was so thick you could cut it with a knife. The soldier staring down darkly at the smaller woman.

"It's Bucky."

Her eyes narrowed. "What?"

"My name, it's Bucky. And you can call me that."

She couldn't hold back the scoff that fell from her lips. "I won't be calling you anything. After all this shit is cleaned up, you'll never see me again."

Bucky's head tilted ever so slightly, his voice soft but dark. "I wouldn't be so sure of that." But before she was able to punch question him, Sharon's voice bellowed through the building.

"Downstairs, now."

The pair ripped their eyes from each other, Minka's falling to the handle on the floor. "I'm telling her you broke that. Now fuck off so I can change." And she shoved him out of the room, closing the door over between them, making sure to not close it the whole say so she could actually get out when she was ready.

By the time she had finished getting ready and made her way down to everyone else, people had begun meandering in, admiring the art.

"Took you long enough." Sharon walked up behind her, whispering harshly in her ear.

"Yeah, well you can thank your old friend for that. He's an asshole, by the way." "And he's not a friend." "Well he's the reason I need a drink." She turned to face Sharon, giving her a look of 'I hate you for dragging me into this' before heading to the bar, fully intending on double parking it the whole night.

It didn't take long for her to finally loosen up again, 5 drinks to be exact, and be back in the middle of the dance floor, surrounded by sweaty bodies. It may have been an art auction, but nothing was ever not a party in Madripoor, especially if it was organised by the Powerbroker themself.

Minka was so caught up in the moment that she had forgotten entirely about the events of the day, the people of the day.

She had, yet again, lost track of the number of drinks she'd had. But every drink handed her way was downed immediately, not taking any time to register where, or more like who, they were coming from. That was always her greatest weakness, denying alcohol.

She was happily about to take yet another unknown drink being handed to her, when it was snatched from her reach and discarded on a nearby table.

"Hey, what the fuck, that was mine!" She growled, turning with her fist ready to launch into whoever had the nerve to steal her drink.

"Stop taking drinks from strangers, are you an idiot?" Suddenly the memories of the men she had to deal with throughout the day came flooding back. "You're gonna get spiked- in fact, you were about to with that one."

"What? Have you been keeping an eye on me? That's not very Winter Soldier of you." Her tone was mocking as she glared up at Bucky, struggling to stand thanks to the combination of copious amounts of alcohol and continuous movement of people around her.

Bucky placed his large hands on her biceps to keep her steady, eyes narrowing at her words. "You really don't know how to be nice to people, do you?"

"You really don't know how to stay the fuck away from people that don't like you, do you?" She retorted immediately, pulling herself from his grip. "I don't need a goddamn babysitter, especially not you. You don't exactly have the best track record with protecting people." Her back was turned to him and stalking off before she even finished her sentence, but she was yanked back in by her forearm.

"Yeah, I don't think so. You're being watched like a hawk by at least 3 men. Who knows how many of them are trying to spike you and get you separated from the crowd." Bucky's eyes were anywhere but hers, scanning the vast room for anything suspicious, clearly on high alert.

"I don't understand why you fucking care?" Bucky's eyes snapped down to hers, alarmed by her intensity.

"Keep your voice down or you're gonna draw attention to us." He hissed at her, lowering his head and pulling her arm to move her closer to him.

"Good, maybe security will see you're harassing me and escort you out." She snarled, anger rising with every word he spoke. "I'm just looking for a good fucking night and you've managed to ruin it twice now."

"Well take it up with Sharon then, she's the one that told me to keep an eye on you. So clearly she thinks you do need a babysitter." He dropped her arm, that would be enough to keep her in her spot for now.

"You're lying." Her words were barely above a whisper, eyes narrowed at him. "She knows I can hold my own. She's literally hired me for personal protection before."

"Clearly not this time." Bucky's eyes were back to scanning the room. "Not with the types of people here tonight." Minka couldn't help but scoff.

"Oh, because you know Madripoor, right? You've spent how many years here? Oh, that's right, none." She suddenly saw her opportunity to escape, Bucky's eyes not trained on her and her arms free.

"Tell her, as much as I appreciate it, she can shove it." And with that she had weaved her way though the crowd of bodies.

But her abandonment didn't last nearly as long as she had hoped.

All of a sudden she was being pushed against the far wall of the room where she was escaping to, breath knocked out of her.

"What the fu-" Lips landing on hers cut off her protests. Her eyes widened when she realised who said lips belonged to.

"Get off of me!" She spat when she was finally able to push Bucky off. "What the fuck is wrong with you?"

"People are following you. If they know you're with me they're less likely to try something."

"I'm not with you. In fact, I want to be as far away from you as physically possible right now." Bucky's arms, which were trapping her in by pressing against the wall either side of her face, fell to his side. His face turned emotionless for a moment before returning to his usual arrogant demeanour.

"You can't tell me you didn't feel the spark." He winked, a cocky grin plastered on his face when he saw the heat creep to her cheeks.

"Please, you wish there was a spark." Her eyes rolled as she paused. "I've had knife fights with more spark than that."

"Maybe we should have a knife fight sometime then." Bucky's response was quick, and smooth.

"Have you forgotten that you're never going to see me again after all this shit? Although," Minka tapped her chin in mock thought. "If you're offering to let me stab you, I'll gladly take you up on that." Unlike Bucky's, her face held no semblance of humour.

"I'm sure you'll change your mind by the end of it." Bucky eyed her suggestively.

"God, please don't tell me you're into me. Maybe I do want those supposed guys to take me, seems better than the alternative." She groaned at the thought of having to deal with him fawning after her.

Bucky's face indicated that that was definitely not he case. His eyes, however, suggested her words had hurt him a little. "God, never. But if you really want, I can hand deliver you to them myself." He pointed in the direction of said men.

Her nose crinkled. "Okay, maybe not them."

"Yeah, that's what I thought."

"Sharon, we have a serious problem!" Minka stormed into the kitchen after the last few people had left and the party was over, Bucky not far behind her. "So I need a babysitter now? I thought I was the personal protection around here." Her fist collided heavily with the table.

"You are," Sharon looked at her nonchalantly as she poured herself a glass of whiskey. "Until alcohol is involved. You're as useless as that new Captain America when there's booze around." A sip. "Case in point." Sharon hummed, watching your eyes follow her glass from bench, to mouth, to bench again.

"Oh please." She snorted. "And you thought pairing me with this idiot was a good idea?" He hand gestured back to Bucky at idiot, not caring if it offended him. "He just makes me want to drink more."

Sharon was about to give her a look, but Minka just shook her head, throwing her hands up. "No, I'm not dealing with this tonight. I'm going to bed." "Take him with you." Sharon nodded towards Bucky.

"Oh fuck no, why the fuck would I-" "Because everyone knows you're involved, and your head is on a spike now, too. They want you dead, Minka." She couldn't argue with Sharon when she used her nickname for her. And the pain in her voice was evident.

"Fine, but you're sleeping on the floor." Bucky just shrugged, "nothing new."

"You sleep there." A finger pointed to the sofa on the far side of the room. Conveniently away from the bed. "I'll get you a blanket."

Bucky's brow quirked. "I thought I was on the floor?" He feigned confusion, head tilting to the side before his cocky smirk returned.

"Keep going and you will be." The blanket was thrown at his face, along with a pillow.

"A pillow too? Wow, it's like a 5 star hotel." She just glared.

"If you snore, you're out. If you sleep talk, you're out. You make any sort of noise and you're out. Capisce?"

"Guess it's a good thing I don't sleep then, huh?" Bucky threw the blanket and pillow onto the sofa.

"Now see, that just makes it weird. Like that scene from Twilight." "Well, yeah, when you put it like that it is." His face screwed up at the thought, recalling the scene.

"How do you- Actually no, I'm tired and I don't care." She had been about to ask how he understood the reference, but decided that was going to open a whole can of worms that she didn't care about.

"I may be over 100, but I have seen Twilight. Wanda made me watch it with her." He didn't need to be a mind reader to know what she was about to ask. And he didn't blame her, it probably would be surprising that a 106 year old had seen Twilight.

"Don't worry, Doll, I won't stare. Much." And now it was her turn to scrunch her face up.

"If you fucking touch me, I'll rip that metal arm from your body and shove it so far up your ass." Her sentence trailed off, however, when Bucky stepped closer to her, his gaze intense as he looked down at her.

"And how do you think I would touch you?" Another step closer, making her step back and gulp.

With her mouth agape, Minka was lost for words, probably for the first time in her life. Sharon unknowingly came to her rescue, though, when she knocked on the door while entering.

"Set your alarm for 6," Her eyes narrowed at them both and the distance, or lack there of, between them. "We've gotta be out of here asap tomorrow. Make sure you get enough sleep." "Will do, Sharon." Minka's gaze flicked to her, nodding once before she left the room, confusion plastered on her features.

"Right, well that's bed time then." Her tongue ran over her lips nervously, and she was painfully aware of Bucky's eyes watching. "I'm going to get changed." She turned and basically ran to the bathroom attached to her room.

"I'll be out here waitin'." "You're disgusting, don't think anything." "Wouldn't dream of it, doll."

#ya'll this gif makes me feel things #also i suck at knowing when to end & start paragraphs i'm sorry #bucky barnes #bucky barnes oneshot #bucky barnes imagine #bucky barnes x reader #sebastian stan #sebastian stan oneshot #sebastian stan imagine #sebastian stan x reader #marvel #marvel oneshot #marvel imagine #marvel x reader #avengers #avengers oneshot #avengers imagine #avengers x reader

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i-am-the-ass-admiral · 3 years

Text

For A Laugh (Benny Miller x gn!reader)

Summary: It’s Benny’s first time at a gay bar and you ask him out the worst way possible; ~1.4k

Tags: humor, colloquial writing style, lust, teasing, flirting, implied bi!benny and reader, bad jokes (like terrible impeccable taste), alcohol consumption, excessive use of the word ‘baby’, soft benny, first date (sort of), au, meet-cute

Rating: Teen

Note: look i’ve never done this before, i just really really got stuck on this idea and i really liked benny. might not be your idea of him but god i think he’s a huge dork and a giant softie so here we are. wanted to throw a queer reader out there since you just don’t see them all that much and do something maybe a little off the wall? idk have fun, i think i’m hilarious XD

By some stroke of fate, you pick Benny up at a bar the first time you meet.

He’s not hard to spot in a crowd as tall as he is and you’re just buzzed enough that your eye keeps coming back to him as the night goes on. He slides from corner to corner with his shoulders slightly hunched and the proverbial tail between his legs, following two shorter men who obviously know what kind of bar they’ve walked in to. Benny though—you didn’t know his name at the time so you called him Baby in your head—darts around with a kind of deer-in-headlights expression. It’s cute.

And annoying.

At first, you roll your eyes at him. Great, another straight dude to hit on your friends and get mad when they say no.

Then you watch him a little longer.

You can’t help it, he’s pretty and looks more than a little lost and even from the end of the bar you can see how wide his tentative smile gets as he looks around. He likes what he sees; you’re just trying to figure out exactly what it is he’s liking. For a while Baby sits at a table with his friends. Holds a fruity cocktail between his knees almost as if he’s scared to be seen with it. Then after a couple drinks his smile gets wider and his voice gets loud. Boy’s boisterous—you can tell by the way he talks with his hands and throws his head back to laugh. He’s actually really fun to watch and it makes you smile. His buddies look almost out of place too until they get up to dance and—wow, talk about snake hips and floor sex, you haven’t seen anyone dance that good off the drag stage in ages. Baby stares at his empty drink for a bit, lost again, then heads to the bar. Not far from where you are, actually. Watching him walk with a couple drinks in him is a world of difference to how he first came in. There’s a swing in his broad shoulders, a confident cocky tilt to his head and you’re not sure if you want to punch him or if it’s the sexiest thing you’ve ever seen.

Despite your better judgment, you’re leaning to the latter.

You make a bet with yourself as he pulls up at the bar—he got the fun drink to please his friends, he’ll order something boring now—and you’re pleasantly surprised to lose your own bet. Baby orders a whole-ass mai tai and looks overjoyed at the gigantic slice of pineapple and cherries garnishing the top. He turns to the stage. Avidly watches a few performers and even starts cheering. That’s when others folks start to take notice. A couple men make a pass and, wouldn’t you know it, Baby plays nice. Smiles and nods politely even though you can tell he’s not really into it. Not totally but it makes you think…

Maybe Baby’s a little bendy and not as straight as you thought.

At that point in the night, your friends are on their fifth dance, you’re on your third drink, and it’s getting way too loud in here for you. You were going to step out for a bit anyway—or so you tell yourself—so why not have some company? Who knows, you might get lucky. And if not, you’ll have an even better excuse to get some air and at least you can say you did it for laughs. Not that this is a casino but you’re feeling feisty. Might as well roll the dice. Baby looks like the kinda Midwest-flavored bite of beefcake that will either have great taste and love your stupid pickups or get scared and leave. Hopefully he’s not the kind to throw a punch.

You sidle up to the bar next to him. No doubt your outfit gets his attention first. It’s not risqué exactly but it’s got flavor, specifically your queer kind of flavor, and it draws the eye the way you wear it. You smile as you look him up and down, enjoying the red flush on his cheeks that trickles down under the collar of his fitted shirt. Wow, Baby is built. You ask the bartender for a couple drinks while part of your buzzing brain throws up red flags. Maybe you should try to land your mouth before it totally takes off but unfortunately for ground control your tongue is flying solo tonight. You get your drink. Pluck off the fruit, take a bite and shout over the music,

“Can I get your name or should I just get you a drink?”

As expected, Baby looks confused as hell but he pastes on a polite, if guarded, smile. “I wouldn’t mind a drink.”

Without missing a beat, you give him the second glass in your hand. There’s something about the way that guarded smile doesn’t quite meet his eyes that makes you want to do something stupid. You want to see him smile and laugh and even though you don’t have the slightest inkling about him, you want to know why such a handsome face would ever look so afraid.

So of course you ask, “How ‘bout a bet then? I make you laugh, you tell me your name?”

He makes a considering face and takes a long sip. “Bet.”

“What do you call the sexuality where you’re attracted to people by no one is attracted to you?”

“What?”

Very off key and with all the drama you can muster, you sing, “Allll Biiiii Myseeeelf.”

Baby snorts a laugh in his drink, which you didn’t expect, and a little warmth grows in your stomach. His faux smile is turning to a real grin. Albeit still a confused one but delighted all the same and he shoots back, “So that’s you, huh? By yourself?”

You wince theatrically and shake your head.

“Ouch, Baby’s got teeth! You got me.”

“Nah, what you get’s a name.” He holds out his hand and you groan internally at the length and breadth of it as you shake. “Benny.”

Just like that Baby becomes Benny and you’re absolutely smitten. You give him your name. Maybe your fingers linger. You want to get him another drink. You want to tell him another joke. Hell, you want to take him home and stuff him full of food in the morning. He giggles a bit and it’s endearing enough you decide to press your luck.

“How ‘bout this one? What’s the best N’Sync song?”

It’s not a fair question, dude might not have ever even heard a boy band in his life, so it takes you by surprise when he immediately pops back with a drawling version of, “It’s tearin’ up my heart when I’m with you?”

“Ooo, a little romantic! I see you!” you tease, pinching his thick bicep for just an instant. Because really, any longer than that and you’d melt.

Benny doesn’t pull away like you were waiting for him to do. Instead he ducks his head, more than booze burning his cheeks, and—ah, hell.

“That one is killer,” you admit, “but I was thinking of the one where they sing ‘Bye Bye Bye’ while we blow outta here for dinner?”

It’s a stupid line—one of the worst you’ve ever come up with—and it comes out more like a question than a joke. You throw back the rest of your drink to hide the look on Benny’s face but to your delight, he says,

“Wait, really?”

“Well yeah.” You lean against the bar next to him, trying and failing to be nonchalant and you shrug. “I’m hungry and even though you’re a Grade A snack I don’t think you’d appreciate me taking a bite. So how ‘bout dinner?”

Benny finishes his drink all at once. Wipes his mouth with the back of his hand as he stands. You sigh to yourself—this is the part where he walks off and you go get dinner alone, you suppose. But then he grins, like really grins, and offers you his arm to hold and suddenly your knees are jello shots.

“I could go for a bite.”

So you go for dinner. Text your friends, of course. But mosey down the street for 12AM tacos and end up laughing with Benny, shoulder to shoulder on the curb until your friends call for a ride.

And even though you didn’t get to take him home and feed him in the morning, your phone still dings through your snooze with a message under Benny’s name that reads:

What did the barista say to his crush?

I like you a latte. :)

Coffee later?

The warmth in your stomach from the night before blooms again and you laugh into your pillow before you text back:

Love to!

#benny miller x reader #benny miller x gn!reader #benny miller x you #triple frontier #well here we are again

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ketamineharry · 3 years

Text

Hush Little Baby ~ Harry Lewis Requested: Yes ~ Hello, idk if you’re doing requests rn but your writing is honestly amazing!! Could you do a Harry imagine where he and reader have been together forever and reader gets accidentally pregnant and it’s just baso the journey if ygm? Like telling him, his friends family fans and then baby being born kinda like a time line typa thing ? If not dw I love you so much !!!! And ~ Please could you write a Harry imagine where he has a daughter Tags: Fluff Word Count: 1.5k

It had been a full hour. A full hour of babysitting Rex Minter, Simon and Talia’s first-born child. They had wanted a date night and it was Harry’s turn to look after the little one. Yet, the whole time you had felt a sickness in the pits of your stomach, you were absolutely sure it would fade when you had eaten something. Here you were, a full large domino's pizza down, and the sickness had not faded. Going against your better judgement, you left Harry with the toddler and made your way to the bathroom.

You were acutely aware of the fact that Simon and Talia were planning on having another little one, so you knew that they would be well stocked on at home pregnancy kits. You carefully took one out of the glass bathroom cabinet, and walked over to the toilet. Deep down, you were hoping that you were wrong. That you were not pregnant. You knew for a fact that you were not ready for a baby and if you were completely honest, you knew that Harry wasn’t either. He was a brilliant uncle and loved having the boys’ children around, babysitting for them so they could have date nights, but he was always able to give them back at the end of a long night. You weren’t so sure how he would feel about not being able to do that. Not having the freedom to do what he wanted anymore, because he had to put this tiny life first. It just didn’t seem like the Harry you knew and loved.

The alarm of your phone pulled you out of the deep thought that you had found yourself in. In no world did you think that having a quiet night in babysitting for some friends would lead you into something so life changing. You carefully picked up the little stick from in front of you, taking a deep inhale of breath. Two lines. Positive. Fuck. As you cleared away the rubbish of the box, you slipped the pregnancy test into your pocket.

As you made your way back to Harry and Rex, all you could hear were joyous screams. Harry really was the fun uncle he had promised to be in a Sidemen Reacts video, many moons ago.

“Y/N!” Rex beamed as he ran up to you. “Uncle Harry was saying that I could have a chocolate for pudding. Usually mummy and daddy say no, and I have to have yogurt or a piece of fruit.”

“Oh that’s great buddy!” You reply, trying to force enthusiasm through the nerves and worry. Although you had no confidence in the fact that you were very successful in that. Harry sent you a glance that confirmed your thoughts. He hadn’t bought it for a second.

As you took Rex’s tiny hand in yours, and made your way to the kitchen, you slipped the pregnancy test to Harry, hoping beyond hope that his reaction was a good one. ‘We need to talk later’ he mouthed, increasing your anxiety tenfold.

The ‘talk’ Harry had referenced that night, didn’t amount to the negative that you had convinced yourself it would. You had agreed to keep the baby. Surprisingly, Harry was all for keeping the little one. He hadn’t expressed to you how much he had wanted a child, because he didn’t want to pressure you into anything. The fact that it had happened was such an unexpected surprise. A good surprise though!

You had been to a few scans together, watching your belly swell and get bigger as the months progressed. When it came to finding out the gender though, you chose not to find out. So, you had taken to calling the baby ‘Peanut’. Telling the other boys was an experience to say the very least. These were the men that had watched Harry grow up, from a reserved teenager to the extroverted man he had become. You had both agreed on telling them all at the same time.

The plan had been to get the children that had already been born into mini Sidemen FC t-shirts, starting with the oldest and ending with the youngest, your bump. Which would be painted black, with the number five as your little one would be the fifth addition to the Sidemen extended family. As it stood, the line was as follows: Ethan’s twins Oscar and Olivia who he shared with his wife Kayleigh, JJ’s son Morphius who he shared with his fiance Bella and little Rex. Nervously you went and stood next to Rex. Thankfully, with baggy clothes you had managed to hide the fact that you were pregnant. You took a hold of Rex’s hand, more for your own comfort than anything else. As if the reactions of your friends were wrapped up in the little hand of a toddler.

Slowly, you lifted your jumper up to reveal the paint that was on your stomach. Showing the number five that was painted on top of it. Suddenly, there was an eruption of cheers. The girls became overly emotional, which was expected. They had just found out that one of their best friends was carrying a new member of their extended family. The boys crowded around Harry, patting him on the shoulder and taking him in for hugs. The love being experienced in the room was tangible and you just knew that no matter what happened, your child would be growing up in such a loving environment.

Telling each of your respective families had been a totally different kettle of fish, however. This is where most of the nerves were mounting from for you. Your parents had become parents at a very young age, and had made a lot of mistakes, you were terrified of having history repeated. Having a baby in your early 20s, wasn’t the plan. You felt like you needed to learn more about yourself first, and one of your deepest fears was to have this confirmed by your own parents. Instead, the reaction that you received was nothing but positive. Your dad had warned Harry that he couldn’t drink as much beer, whilst your mum had warned you about the severe lack of sleep you were about to get. Overall though, they were beyond excited to have their family expanding. Harry’s parents had cried when you revealed the news to them. His sister, Rosie had got Peanut a little stuffed giraffe which she aptly named Gina.

Setting up the nursery was probably the most enjoyable part of the ordeal. Partly because you loved unleashing your creative side; and partly because decorating the nursery came at the latest point of your pregnancy. You had opted for a pale yellow paint for three of the walls, opting for a feature wall which was decorated in a safari print wallpaper.

You were helping Harry with the final touches of the room, you placed Gina giraffe in the corner of the cot, next to the pillow so that your baby always had comfort. Thinking about it, you were sure that you had a ragdoll from when you were a baby at your parents house. It’s funny how it’s the little things that you remember in the biggest moments.

As you turned around to admire your handy work, you felt an immense pressure, causing you to grip onto the cot and double over. You had never experienced anything like this before and you were pretty sure you knew what it was. Your baby was arriving and it was arriving fast.

“Harry,” You screamed, trying your best to stay calm as you knew this was a pivotal moment for the both of you. He was definitely as nervous as you, as he didn’t understand the mood changes, or the pain that you felt. Despite having attended every pregnancy class and read upteen pregnancy books. He had put a lot of opportunities that had presented themself to him on hold for the sake of you and your child as he wanted to be as supportive as possible. Which a meer nine months ago, you would have never imagined Harry doing.

You heard pounding up the stairs, Harry’s usual cheery disposition changing as soon as he saw the immense panic that had taken over your face. “I’ll grab the pregnancy bag, make your way to the car, it's already unlocked.” He informed me, as he grabbed the pregnancy bag from the other side of the room, helping me down the stairs as it had become near impossible to do the simplest of tasks, now that I was carrying our baby.

---

Labour was without a doubt the most painful thing you had ever experienced. It was a quick birth, having arrived at the hospital at seven, and giving birth to your daughter at exactly fifteen minutes past seven. Harry had fallen asleep in the chair in the corner of your room.

Your daughter, however, was screaming blue murder. Despite this, Harry still wouldn’t wake. So, with all your might, you scooped your little one into your arms. “Hush little baby, don’t you cry. We swear that we’ll never leave your side and if we do, remember this love like ours never dies.” You whisper, rocking her into a soft slumber as you placed a soft kiss to the top of her head. Your little family was already complete.

#harry lewis #harry lewis imagine #w2s imagine #w2s x reader #w2s #harry lewis x reader #'sidemen imagine #sidemen x reader

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honeymooneyy · 3 years

Text

a dog in your past life

context: fifth year, septemberish - marauders are animagii (idk how to spell it lmfao) but haven’t told remus yet, pre-wolfstar, idk i was bored and the spacing kinda weird

Remus had to admit that he sort of enjoyed styling hair.

They had been lounging around the common room when Lily began complaining about how she couldn’t get a certain braid right. Remus’ mom had shown him how to braid hair one day when Remus was bored and was entranced by her long hair. So he offered to do Lily’s hair. The girls had been in awe of his skills and now Lily and Marlene had matching intricate braids in their long hair. He had just finished off Mary’s and was about to stand and stretch when Sirius plopped down in front of him.

“Do me! Do me!” Sirius crowed, lolling his head back so it bumped into Remus’ knees and giving him silver puppy dog eyes. “I want my hair all pretty.”

Remus couldn’t find it in himself to say no so he just just gave a small nod and clicked his tongue, “Your hair’s already pretty, what are you on about?”

“I want it like theirs.” Sirius pointed his chin towards the girls who were now settling down near the fireplace. “I don’t usually style my hair.”

“You put your hair in buns sometimes,” Remus mumbles, shifting on the couch so Sirius’s was resting against his knees instead between his legs. He had broader shoulders than the girls and it just felt awkward to be spread out like that. “Your man-buns.”

Sirius laughs at that, his eyes twinkling as he continues to stare up at Remus, “Oh shush Moony, you know you love them.”

If only he knew.

Remus doesn’t reply to that, instead carding his fingers through Sirius’ hair, attempting to find his part. Unlike the girls, who had chatted with Remus the entire time, Sirius just lets out a soft sigh and lets his eyes fall shut, resting his head against Remus. Remus takes that as a good sign, and begins braiding a portion of his hair, being careful not to tug too hard.

Sirius looked as if he was in pure bliss, his eyes still shut as he let Remus style his hair. Even when James came around to ask if they wanted to play charades with the girls, Sirius just hummed a no, just shifting in his position on the carpet.

“Sirius,” Remus starts, leaning forward to talk quietly so it didn’t bother the current round of charades, “Do you even want your hair done or did you just want someone to play with your hair?”

Sirius opens an eye, lazily, before closing it again and mumbling, “What’s the difference?”

“You’re silly.” Remus smiles, before running his fingers through the braid to open it up. Instead of starting a new braid he just begins to run his fingers through the long silky hair, and then playfully scratches at Sirius’ scalp as if he were a dog. “I think you were a puppy in your past life.”

Sirius stiffens at those words before playing it off, “Cmon, Remus, you gotta agree it feels nice. No one ever plays with my hair.”

“You could just ask,” is the only reply Remus could muster. He didn’t want to admit that he rather enjoyed playing with Sirius’ hair. But honestly, Remus enjoyed most things that had to do with Sirius.

Remus hadn’t completely noticed that he had zoned out until Lily plopped down onto the couch next to him with a silly grin. And then she started making eyes at the way Sirius was sitting in front of him, his hair at the mercy of Remus.

‘Shut up,’ Remus mouthed at her, before turning back to Sirius and bowing his head so she couldn’t see his pink cheeks.

Instead she just leaned in to whisper, “Whipped.”

With a giggle, she stood and returned to the game of charades, tossing her fiery hair behind her shoulder. The girls were thoroughly disappointed with the way James and Peter were dominating the game, winning each round. So now the teams had been shuffled around and Peter had gotten Mary, Lily got James, that sly git, and Marlene stayed with Dorcas.

Remus wasn’t completely sure how James had convinced Lily to be on his team, but he was beginning to suspect it had something to do with the way Peter and Mary were blushing around each other.

Lily on the other hand looked peeved, James was now miming something for her and it wasn’t clear what he was trying to portray. With a scowl, she huffed, “Stop flapping your arms, if I didn’t get it the first time, I’m not going to get it now.”

“I’m not fla-“ James began before the others shushed him collectively.

“Remus?”

Remus looked away from his friends’ antics to Sirius who was now looking up at him, sleepily. “Yeah?”

“You stopped. ‘M tired,” Sirius murmured, nestling into the side of Remus’ knee.

“Why don’t you go to bed?” Remus asked gently, despite the fact that he knew Sirius would refuse. It was a common occurrence nowadays for Sirius to wake up in the middle of the night with a scream, but it still broke Remus’ heart every time. He couldn’t imagine what must’ve happened over the summer.

“It’s lonely up there, everyone’s down here, I don’t wanna go alone,” Sirius whined, sounding much like a small kid.

Remus didn’t comment on it, instead standing up and offering him a hand. “I’ll come, I’m a bit tired too, maybe I’ll read a book or something.”

Sirius gave him a hazy grin, “You’re the best Moons. Hm, moons and Sirius the star.”

Remus cracked a smile at that as he began herding Sirius up the stairs to their dorm. Better he get in bed while he’s still sleepy.

You’re such a mom.

Sirius’ words from earlier that week echoed through his head and he had to laugh at that. He was a mom, of sorts. Sirius doesn’t exactly have anyone to dote on him, so someone’s gotta do it. While he might hide it behind jokes, James also often acts as if he’s Sirius’ mom. Even Peter has stayed awake with Sirius after a particularly bad night. No one ever mentions it the day after, because it’s just another normal part of their day. In the end, they were always there for one another, because if not, who would?

Remus smiled at the thought of the little family they had formed.

see the spacing is so big idk why ^^ lol might make a part two bc it’s part of a fic i’m writing

part two

#marauders #wolfstar #jily fluff #found family #harry potter #remus lupin #sirius black #remus x sirius #wolfstar fluff

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max-vandenburg-is-life · 3 years

Text

Long Loki rant incoming

Ok first things first I've always liked Loki a lot as a character but I don't consider myself a really really big fan mainly because I haven't read the comics. So all this rant is gonna be only about mcu loki and loki in the mcu has been written differently depending on the movie so yeah. And on that note let's go!!!!

So today I'm gonna talk about what I liked and what I didn't like about the Loki show. This is obviously just my opinion, you can disagree with me! I'd love to hear your opinions!

First I wanna talk about is the writing of Loki's character. So previously it has been established in the mcu that Loki doesn't do bad things just because he's a bad guy or because he wants power above everything else, but because after all the manipulation and lying he went through as a child, the abuse, always been seen as less than those around him and being taught to hate himself for who he was (a Jotun). He wants validation and being treated the same as the others, he doesn't really care about ruling or being king. His actions are a result of his trauma. So the show painting him as "He's a bad guy!! He's evil he can't help it it's in his nature!! He just wants to be king!!!" felt off to me since it completely goes against all the previous canon. Apart from that, I feel the show also erased other aspects of him that had always been essential to his character, such as him being very smart and always having a plan, and his powers (he BARELY used his powers throughout the season and he's supposed to be the best sorcerer in the nine realms. Please). So yeah there's that. I didn't absolutely despise his character in the show or anything like that, he generally seemed more happy and chill and that was good, I just felt some aspects of the character seemed inconsistent.

Apart from Loki, something I loved about the show were all the new characters that we were introduced to. Sylvie was absolutely fantastic, she had a well written tragic backstory, she had a goal and she had layers. She was a really well written character. Also she was just really cool overall, she had a cool personality and seeing her use her powers was very fun. (Sylvie your hand in marriage) (I guess I can talk about the "betrayal" now. So yeah not gonna lie I don't think it was that bad. She had a goal she had been pursuing her whole life and she obviously prioritized that before a guy who she met a few days ago. She did hurt him of course but still it's easy to understand her decision.) Mobius was also really cool, in the first episode I didn't like him much but I started liking him a lot later on. He's just a good guy, he wants to help people. (HE ONLY WANTED A JETSKI MARVEL). And I liked his story a lot, he was forced into working for the tva because his memories were erased and he was told what he was doing the right thing when killing all those people, but once he finds out all of it was false he immediately starts going against it and trying to help as many people as he can. Ravonna was also a good character (I keep saying all of them are good characters lol they're well written ok). Like okay she was a little bit evil but I liked her. I really liked her ambition and her confidence. I would have loved to know more about her life at the tva, because it seemed like because of her position she knew some things that most didn't. Hunter B15 was also really good, loved her character development. Casey only appeared in the first two eps but for some reason I liked him a lot idk why. Casey my beloved. Kang was mind-blowing good, he absolutely carried the episode. He was so fun to watch and a very interesting character. This is how you do villains Marvel. And then all the Loki variants were amazing. Classic Loki was great, he was more mature and wiser than the Loki we're used to watching and I felt really sad about his whole situation (aka trying and failing to find his brother because he missed him, getting pruned and then dying). Kid loki was a BLAST, I really liked the little funky dude and I would love to know more about his life. Boastful Loki didn't appear for long but I liked him a lot, he looked like a really funny guy I wish he had had more screen time. And then there was the Lokigator which was also great. President Loki was also cool (meaning he had the coolest outfit), but we didn't see much of him. I think that's a big problem with the show, because they made it seem like it was gonna be more about the other Loki variants and their timelines (that's what it seemed to me from the trailers) but then we barely got that. Sad shit.

Now let's talk about the writing of the show in general. The writers definitely went off with the philosophical conversations, I enjoyed them greatly (Loki's and Mobius' talk in the second ep and Loki's and Sylvie's talk in the third ep were amazing). Something I didn't like at all about the show (this is probably my biggest complaint) is that the writing of the show throughout the episodes didn't seem consistent, like each episode seemed to be a different genre, and that made the whole story feel weird. What I'm trying to say is: the first episode was about Loki learning more about his life and reflecting on why he does the things he does. There was more to the episode but it was mainly that. It was a very emotional episode. The second episode looked like a cop show, they investigated a crime scene in the beginning, they did some detectiving, they had a great breakthrough and found out were the villain was hiding in the end. The third episode was an action episode. It gave me the vibes of mid season episode that isn't too relevant to the plot in which the characters go on some short mission. The fourth episode I can't exactly categorize it I think it was kinda like episode 1 but with some more action. The fifth episode was also a mix, they had a lot of reflecting on Loki's character like in the first episode and then also some action. And the last episode was mostly just exposition and a tiny bit of action at the end, very philosophical and stuff. It also felt like in the first two episodes they were indicating that the show was gonna be about free will and good and evil but that kind of disappeared for a big part of the show. I'm trying so hard to explain myself well, I hope what I say makes sense. Now my opinion on the episodes, my favourites were definitely ep 1, 3 and 5 (haha odd numbers go brrrr). The pilot was absolutely amazing, and I loved the direction the show seemed to be taking (YES MARVEL explore his trauma mmmm that's some good shit right there). It was really emotional but like in a good way. The third episode was great. I think it balanced really well the action and the dialogue, seeing Loki and Sylvie going on their shenanigans, using their powers and fighting was really fun, and then the train talk scene was absolutely amazing (bi loki yay! Gonna talk about this later). The fifth episode was great mostly because seeing all the other Loki variants and how they contrasted between each other was fantastic and I loved it. I really hope we see more of the variants in the next season. The other eps, the second and fourth were okay, the one I think was the worst one was the last one. Damn that episode. It was a very slow episode. Thank god the guy who plays Kang was really good because otherwise the episode would have been impossible to watch. There was so much exposure but it felt like we already knew most of it? They talked about how multiple timelines existing was bad because chaos and stuff, and they talked about the war in which the different timelines battled each other. Ok we already knew this. I feel like the only important thing to take from that whole talk was that Kang's variants are very powerful and dangerous and they were introducing the villain to the mcu. The whole episode felt like instead of giving closure to the characters or ending some storylines, the main thing it was doing was introducing the concept of the multiverse for the next marvel movies.

Something that surprised me a lot about the show is how important it is for the mcu storyline. Like in the first episode they talked about how the tva (and of course Kang) was much more powerful than the Infinity Stones, when basically all previous marvel movies were about them and about their power. And then Kang was revealed to have created a sacred timeline, he controls absolutely everything that happens. All of this is so important and for some reason I didn't think the show was gonna be like this. Not that I'm complaining, this is great. And I feel like a lot of people are not realising how big it is? Like I don't see much talking about how this is literally the greatest power in the universe.

Damn this is getting long sorry.

I suppose I'll have to talk about it because it has been this big thing. I'm talking about the loki x sylvie pairing. I didn't like it too much, it felt a lot like the writers went "he's a guy she's a girl so they have to fall in love", like I felt they had a very different dynamic and when they said that I was mostly surprised and confused. Because they were variants of each other their romance felt weird to me, and the fact that they made a character genderfluid and then made a woman and a man version fall in love also rubbed me the wrong way (I'll talk about the genderfluidity later). I did like the mobius x loki pairing more, but still I don't think they should have got any romance this season, I feel like there has to be a lot more progress in that relationship before any romance. I generally feel like Loki should first start getting some friends and then later on we can start with romance. But yeah this is just my opinion. And all the drama and discourse there has been over this???? Some of you guys look ridiculous not gonna lie.

Ok now let's talk about representation. I'm not poc myself so I don't feel like I'm in the position to say if something was good or bad, so I'm not gonna talk about poc rep. The show did a good job with female characters, many of the main characters were women and they were very well-written, not sexualized and cast appropriately for their age (I can't believe I'm praising this, this should be the bare minimum. Why is media in general so bad. Like please just.) About the bi rep now. I'm sure that the writers or directors of the show had to fight really hard with marvel so that they could make loki canon bi, so yeah cheers to that guys good job. Obviously it's not enough, and I really hope his bisexuality is explored more later. But yeah we finally have a queer character in the mcu this is big. Now about the genderfluid rep. OOF. I have a lot to say about this. It was bad. Really bad. I don't know if they just don't know what genderfluid means but that's what it looks like after watching the show. Not only were all of the variants cis, but they also went on to say that Loki as a woman was a weird and uncommon thing. Oh my god. And what angers me the most is the fact that Marvel used the so called genderfluid confirmation to their benefit. They exploited so much that little piece of paper that said his sex (not even gender) was fluid. I saw SO MANY articles praising marvel for making him canon genderfluid, and then it was absolutely shit. Absolutely shit. Out of everything in the show this is definitely what I hate the most.

Gotta calm down now. The soundtrack of the show was amazing, the actual songs they used were perfect and then the music they composed for the show was just *chef's kiss* (i have no idea how they're called but the song that plays during the title sequence WHAT A BANGER and the one that plays when loki and mobius are looking at the whole tva from the balcony in the first ep WHAT A BANGER). The aesthetic of the show was also great, the colours were really pretty (Lamentis bi colours my beloved) and I think it had some really cool shots. The acting was great, I'm gonna highlight Kang because I thought he was amazing. The costumes and that stuff were also really cool, I really liked seeing all the different versions of outfits they gave to the Loki variants (if anyone is interested I made another post reviewing all the variants' outfits) and Kang's funky costume was great too. The design of the places and that stuff (I have no idea how to call these lol I'm trying so hard but I don't know any of the technical words) was great: Lamentis was really beautiful, the void was also very cool and the tva was really well designed.

Ok y'all I think this is it. I'm so sorry this is much longer than I expected and if anyone actually reads all of it i love you and PLEASE tell me your thoughts (if anyone wanna chat about the show with me privately send me a message!!! I love talking with y'all). A little final note, English is not my first language, nor my second, so yeah sorry if I can't explain myself well. Bye!!!!

#i feel like this is super long and boring so if anyone actually reads all of it thanks #these are basically all my thoughts i really had to let them out #overall I'll say it was a pretty good show if we forget Loki's weird characterisation and the terrible genderfluid rep #i realized a few days ago that i can actually say whatever i want #like i can say my opinion i can say what i think and then people can disagree with me! and it's no big deal #I'm allowed to have opinions on things as well as everyone else #I'm working on some stuff #anyways that's all #please tell me what y'all think #I'd love to talk about the show!#loki spoilers #loki show #loki series #sylvie #mobius #kang the conqueror #he who remains #classic loki #kid loki #lokigator #gator loki #boastful loki #bisexual representation #genderfluid representation #ravonna renslayer #hunter b 15 #marvel #marvel show #loki #an original post no way

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the-pope-is-in · 3 years

Text

upcoming works

if anyone here has read/enjoyed my fics , I just wanted to post my ENTIRE drafts to let you know what’s coming next (I can’t promise I’ll get around to all of these, but if there’s any you want me to prioritize , just let me know)

in no specific order

Legolas Greenleaf (LOTR) - based more off of the movies than the books. oc is half elf half sorceress and she goes on Bilbo’s adventure .. eventually meeting Legolas in mirkwood and then fighting with him in the battle of five armies. after the battle, she finds him again and begs him to take her with him because she doesn’t want to go back to her old life again. they go on a bunch of adventures. oc is besties w aragorn.

Lemony Snicket (ASOUE) - as in his entity as a character in the series, not the author himself (more the tv show than the books even though the books were my ENTIRE childhood) ((the author’s actual name is daniel handler and he’s a lovely person)) anyways,

my advice for you first and foremost is to never fall in love with a writer

especially if that writer is a prominent member of a secret organization

especially especially if said writer is committed to uncovering and documenting the sad lives of three orphans, the children of a past lover who has died tragically

my name is odessa denouement and I am begging you to put this book down and go read something more pleasant, such as the littlest elf or a story that doesn't involve pain, suffering, and a general lack of morals

odessa and lemony meet when their VFD missions overlap and they’re forced into a number of highly dangerous situations together. features a tragic ending.

Percy Weasley and Oliver Wood (HP) - because we all know they were in love. probably their last years of hogwarts into the second war. focuses a lot on percy going to the dark side. probably pretty angsty.

Will Turner (POTC)- oc is Jack Sparrow’s daughter. she’s super cool. raised by pirates. best parental relationship I’ve ever written (I usually go for the really shitty parent trope, but this time their relationship is rlly soft and makes me happy) anyways, she falls in love with will turner and it’s hot.

Beatrice and Phillipa (HP) - cute lesbians in gryffindor (golden trio era). should probably read my bill weasley series first because it’s a spinoff. would probably be their fifth year to sometime around the end of the war. main focus would be bea’s shift to the dark side.

FP Jones (Riverdale) - gotta preface this one with the fact that I hate riverdale as much as the next guy (sorry riverdale fans) I mean . the show’s insane. BUT FP is what got me through it. so this is the story of him and jughead’s mom in the 80s , then there’s a time jump to the first or second season. going to be short but cute.

Steven Hyde (that 70s show) - NOT played by d*nny m*sterson. anyways, oc moves to point place from nyc with her mom (who kinda sucks -yes, we’re back to the shitty parent trope-) falls for hyde and it’s rly angsty. at some point she lives in hyde’s old house but i’m not sure exactly when bc idk what season I want to start the season on. she’s also best friends with jackie because I’m in love with jackie.

Regulus and Marlene (HP) - umm so to be completely honest I don’t know what the plan was for this one. the only thing it says in the draft is “marlene is a slytherin”. I think I was high when I made it. but I feel like there’s some sort of potential there so we’ll see what happens.

Remus Lupin (HP) - either wolfstar or a slytherin oc or maybe regulus I don’t know. I have some ideas for scenes, but no specific people or genders or really any details at all. I just know I’m in love with remus and want to write about him and his sweaters.

Jesse Pinkman (Breaking Bad) - oc and jesse keep meeting by chance. first it’s because she’s staying at his parent’s house out of necessity (ep 2), then it’s because she’s Jane’s roommate, then it’s at Jane’s funeral. they keep saying they’re parting ways. that they’ll never see each other again, but it doesn’t work. one way or another, they’ll end up together.

Minerva McGonagall and Pomona Sprout (HP) - one of my fav ships ever. would start in their sixth year and there would be a few major time jumps over the course of the story. very soft relationship.

Peter Parker (MCU) - oc has powers over the elements. recruited to the avengers by tony stark. in the process of said transition, hydra attacks her family and oc is filled with rage. throughout the story, she lives with different members of the avengers (she moves around a lot) and she and peter have a friends to lovers sort of thing.

Daniel Desario (Freaks and Geeks) - charlotte’s been friends with the freaks since she was a kid. she’s been on-again-off-again dating nick since middle school, she has mixed feelings about kim, ken is her favorite person ever, and she is hopelessly in love with Daniel. when lindsay comes into the picture and things shift dramatically, charlotte finally has the chance to shoot her shot.

Spencer Reid (Criminal Minds) - word for word what I have in my drafts:

ummmmm so we've got a main character named ummmmmm sophie or phoebe or something and shes like blonde and short and only three months older than reid and sup super smart like with math and science and stuff and she graduated early and has a doctorate and is smart and stuff but doesnt really tell anyone and looks kinda sloppy and has a really relaxed attitude and we love her - she almost dropped out of high school because she was bored but then agent gideon was like dude come on ill give u a job (or something?)

oh and her parents and little brother died in a fire when she was eight only her older brother survived and they are super close she loves him so much but she has some trauma from constantly being sent to foster homes where nodbody wanted to keep her bc shes difficult and also like watching her parents die so she has a HUGE fear of fire and an irrational fear of big dogs

ANYWAYS starts off with her at her house and she's just hangin she has a cat and she's making herself dinner and she's one of those super cute single bi girls who likes her plants and her music and her science bookstore

friends in college story (an original work) - okay so I wanna go to film school (I want to be a screenwriter) and this is an original script I’ve been working on but I might adapt parts of it to a story. basically it’s like a dark academia sitcom where a bunch of liberal, progressive kids go to this rural, ultra-christian college for different reasons and find each other and become the ELITE friend group. obviously it would have a better name than the “friends in college story” although now it’s sort of growing on me

the new tragedy (an original work) - “sometimes i need to remind myself that you existed. You were real, you were so real. your hair was real, your crooked smile was real. the way you couldnt talk in the morning before you’d had your coffee, or how you could never get to sleep at night without an episode of whatever show you were obsessing over in the moment. oh my god. you were real.

she looked like death. the guy, not the concept. sallow skin and dark, sunken eyes that absorbed all of the light and trapped it, holding it hostage and never letting it out. when she smiled, the light poured all over her, like she was taking a shower in it. when she frowned, she looked like a storm cloud. I loved her. I loved her so much.

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lumilasi · 3 years

Text

I saw this in my feed and since I was pretty bored and FINALLY free from the said boredom, figured I could do this one. I generally enjoy question based tags, especially if they relate to art/writing/fandom/are some general things about favorite colors, music, foods, things about your home country etc.

(basically, you can tag me in stuff similar to listed above things and I’ll probably do them if I see them/have time lmao)

Fic Writer Questions!

How many works do you have on AO3?

44 total. I used to have more but I’ve deleted an old Bleach one I knew I’d never continue to write, and two bnha ones for the same reason (those two were also at the very beginning stages so nobody missed a lot anyway)

What's your total AO3 wordcount?

4 269 068......wow. It’s even MORE than I even imagined. Over 4 million words.

....Someone take my writing tools away from me lmao

How many fandoms have you written for and what are they?

Three. I started with MCU, moved on to Bleach and now I’ve done most ofr BNHA

What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

Crossroads - 3069

Family Secrets - 3015

Reanimate - 1534

The neighbor - 809

Espada and Fraccion - 782

.....Admittedly this list surprised me. Not the first three but the last two. The fifth is an one shot for Bleach that I wrote AGES ago. I also for some reason expected this list to match the bookmark list more lmao

Do you respond to comments, why or why not?

I always try to respond to every comment I get, but often times when it’s just one word or a heart emoji I don’t really know what to say, so I might not reply to those. I do appreciate every comment I get, and read every single one, even if I don’t respond

What's the fic you've written with the angstiest ending?

I don’t do angst endings typically, but Family Secrets is probs the most obvious choice, given what happens at the end.

- and its not even the real end, because I couldn’t help myself and made two more stories for the AU that was like “hey! this character I made you all love so much actually DIDN’T die, he just had unfinished business back home” lmao

Do you write crossovers? If so what is the craziest one you've ever written?

Rarely, typically they’re between my own fics (the story that crosses the paths of Crossroads and Family Secrets AU’s, literally titled Crossover, creative name I know OTL I was out of ideas)

Or between me and other people’s fics. Currently there’s two, both with Crossroads: one with Theteapotofdoom’s fic Something Good, and another with leontheneon’s fic Here with you. Both stories are basically a two part series that is non canon to actual Crossroads. The first story is finished, second one has two chapters left...that...I uh...struggle to write it seems OTL

(not tagging either person into this because Tea is very busy IRL right now so I don’t want to bother her, and Leon hasn’t been around in ages, IDK if they even use tumblr anymore)

Have you ever received hate on a fic?

Not really no? I can only remember one time with somebody kind of demanding me to completely rewrite one fic in the past. It wasn’t really hate, more just...kinda unreasonable in my eyes? This was years ago by now.

While I did understand their side and the particular struggle they had (once they actually explained it, the first comment at the time came off pretty rude and demanding), I still feel them wanting me to re-write an entire multi-chapter fic just for them is a bit unreasonable, like said.

Like it wasn’t just couple of grammatical errors that was their issue, we’re talking weeks and even months long process of completely reworking multi-chapter story, because the grammar wasn’t tip top perfect. (I’m not a native speaker so there’s bound to be some mistakes; pointing out small occasional things is one thing - asking me to rewrite an entire multi-chapter story is another)

You can imagine that is not exactly high on my priorities list with IRL responsibilities and being more focused on the actual content of what I write, the ongoing stories I’m updating. This fic isn’t even finished yet either, so...yeah. Like after they explained their side of the story I was a bit more understanding, but its still....a bit ridiculous and unreasonable in my eyes to ask somebody to do such a massive overhaul when the story isn’t even finished yet?? Like maybe once its done and I have time I can go and edit it, but not when I haven’t even finished it lmao

Do you write smut? If so what kind?

Nah. I don’t care about smut a whole lot personally. I much more enjoy writing emotional scenes, character interactions and mystery. Plot over porn basically lmao

Have you ever had a fic stolen?

I don’t...do people actually do this? It feels like such a weird and pointless thing to do. It’s fanfic. stuff you write for fun and for free, for people to read for free. I’d also imagine its pretty easy to get caught given AO3 shows when you first posted your story.

Have you ever had a fic translated?

Yes, a couple of times. In Russian and I think other one was Chinese?

Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Writing the crossovers was kinda that? Like I asked feedback from Tea and Leon on how to write them. there was also actually third crossover story that was supposed to happen (only I wasn’t going to be the one to write it) but this project has been shelved as the other person had to drop majority of online activity due to some IRL health related things. (I’m just glad they recently contacted me to inform they were doing better)

What’s your all time favorite ship?

Right now it’s..probably pretty obvious its Shigadabi, but I can never really say any ship is my all time fave, as it always changes depending on the fandom lmao.

I guess my favorite character x proper sleep/emotional stability/happiness will always be the OTP

What’s a WIP that you want to finish but don’t think you ever will?

Oof. I always try to finish every single one, and if I absolutely know I won’t, I tend to just delete them. Thankfully I’ve only done it thrice. Which I guess is still a lot, but compared to how much I write, in context not really?

What are your writing strengths?

From what I’ve gathered of feedback, its typically emotional moments/character dialogue and interaction/character arcs and so. Mystery plots too. Or maybe that last one is just me lmao

What are your writing weakness?

Personally, while I tend to get positive feedback on both, sometimes I feel like I struggle to choose a good pacing for a fic, and fight scenes are always a pain. Namely, I might struggle with making the pace too long-winded and slow sometimes. Ironically, my IRL update pacing is probs a bit too fast in turn. (To add another layer of irony, I got an update ready for Unravel that I’ll post after making this tag)

Also writing shorter stories. I’ve been trying to write one-shots more (like the Spinaraki series thing) to kinda try and get myself to pack up my stories better and not let them always spiral out of control haha

What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic?

I did try to do that once with a fic I deleted, I had a native speaker help me with the canadian french bits. This person is no longer active on tumblr, and I deleted that fic because I realized I’d never finish it.

Technically tho, as a non-native English speaker, EVERY word is in other language to me lmao. I could only add Finnish as an extra one easily, and it rarely makes sense to do so anyway.

What was the first fandom you ever wrote for?

MCU. It’s what I originally made my AO3 for, as I felt brave enough to post things. I also can’t remember writing fandom related stuff before that, it was typically more oc related. Writing fics has helped me learn a lot about world-building, character consistency and all that stuff, without having to make everything from scratch (tho I do enjoy doing that as well of course). I feel like my original work writing has improved too thanks to my fic writing shenanigans in a way lmao. Tho that might just be me, IDK

What’s your favorite fic you’ve written?

Oooof. This changes a lot depending on the time. I can never really pick just one either: my current favorites are Stringmaster, The neighbor and Family Secrets

Stringmaster because I love building the Steampunk AU, and Tomura’s relationship with Dabi and his Sensei, The neighbor because I personally think the romance build up in that one is probably one of the best I’ve done so far (the character dialogue in that is among my favorites I’ve written as well) and FS, because it taught me a lot about character building through writing a character like Hisashi.

Plus I just really like Hisashi.

And baby Izuku and little Tenko are super adorable.

And Inko is the best mum.

Also the fact the whole story is so ironic in a sense its still kinda funny to me.

The only writer I know that might be around rn is @nightlilly0110 soo...I guess I’ll tag them if they want to do this! Anybody who’s a writer can snatch this too of course ;)

#tag game #writer tag #fic writing

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themalhambird · 3 years

Note

Reverse unpopular opinions: Ace headcanons!

Okay, so I’ve just realised I don’t. Actually. have? many ace headcanons of my own and I should probably unpack that at some point. Or not. Does that matter? IDK, now I’m spiralling.

A N Y W A Y.....

Obviously, Ace headcanons are great. It doesn’t detract from a canonical romantic relationship to headcanons one or more of the people involved in it is asexual -

(okay you know what? I keep writing things out with a lot of different caveats acknowledging that I understand that sex can be an important part of a relationship to people and that I very much respect that and that we need to be careful not to write over that with asexuality, and then deleting it because I’m not sure I’m wording it right, and trying again, and then deleting it again, and. I’m just giving up and just: Sex can be very important for some people and that’s very valid of them! but also, ace can be very important for some people and that’s equally valid! )

-I don’t know why I’m finding this post so difficult. Where were we? Ace Headcanons are great, right.

One of the nice thing about Ace Headcanons is that it means I can take sex out of the stuff I don’t want there to be sex in. For example: I do not want sex in my Doctor Who, ever. Therefore, as far as I am concerned, the Doctor is ace. All of them. Every single incarnation ever, but ESPECIALLY TEN. ACE, ACE, ACE. If I’m feeling especially Acey then Donna is ALSO ace and she and Ten fly around in the TARDIS being Ace Best Friends FOREVER. Not Sorry, I Do Make The Rules. (the TARDIS, incidentally, is also Ace)

If I headcanon Richard 2 as ace I’m talking about Shakespeare Richard, not Historical Richard. ....I know that might seem like a very blurry and non meaningful separation, but it makes sense in my head. Basically, it’s like: I have two Richard dolls and they’re virtually identical but they have some superficial differences (Shakespeare Richard gets to make his Usurpery, Jerk-Face cousin look like a tit in front of all the other nobles. Historical Richard is very jealous.) Anyway, if I’m playing working with a Richard doll and he’s ace, then it’s Shakespeare Richard and you can rest assured that Historical Richard is still off in the back of my mind being gloriously bi with Robert and Anne (and also, Shakespeare Richard will probably be be being gloriously bi with BBG, Aumerle and The Queen at some point in the near future too).

Do I have any evidence that Elizabeth I was ace? as much evidence that the writers of that play about Francis Walsingham had that she was secretly fucking anyone mildly attractive and in possession of a working penis, which is to say No, Bog Off, It’s My Portrayal Of Her and I’ll Do It How I Like, Thank You. As long as I’m acknowledging that it’s historical fiction and not historical fact, it’s nbd.

Finally, I just want to say- I’m doing a MA course and this semester, there is not a single text on the syllabus of either module that doesn’t involve sex in way. Last semester, I sat in a lecture room listening to my (wonderful! I love him!) Authurian Lit Professor talk about how Tennyson’s beautiful depiction of a thunderstorm in one of the Idylls was hugely suggestive of sexual intercourse taking place, and the rest of the class nodded around me and chimed in with their thoughts on the matter while I sat there going ????????????????????? and struggled to understand how the HELL they even thought about trying to get sexual suggestions out of. The Thunderstorm. (There wasn’t a single text on that module which didn’t involve sex either, which. DUH. It’s King Arthur. Lancelot and Guinevere gonna Lancelot and Guinevere.) My other module was Shakespeare. It was up and down on the sex. We were focusing strictly on leadership/management so it only came up specifically in Richard III and Anthony and Cleopatra. I don’t doubt that if it had been more generally focused, and the class had consisted of more people than uh. just me. there would have been way, way more sex talk.

And I don’t think this is a bad thing, per say. But sex seems to saturate like. 99.9% of the literature or the media that’s out there. If it’s aimed at teens upward, there’s sex in it. I read something aimed at 8 year olds the other day (the fifth book in a series I’d loved when I was 8 ,but had never gotten my hands on past #4) and I was shocked to realised how relieved and joyful it made me to be reading something that not only had ABSOLUTLEY ZERO SEX, but also only barely hinted at the idea of romance (You should all read The Princess School. And then come talk to me about how Rapunzel is clearly an aromantic genderfluid lesbian who uses She/Her or They/Them pronouns depending on their mood. Sleeping Beauty is also a lesbian and will one day be her girlfriend.) Anyway, the point is. Asexual headcanons carve out- not a safe space, exactly. I’m not sex repulsed, exactly- in fact I normally find it interesting and enjoyable to discuss/read/write* about as long as it’s between fictional** characters. ...A quiet space, perhaps? Yeah, a quiet space where for, like. However long I want to stay there I get to think about whatever the hell I want and sex doesn’t need to intrude At All and doing this is- if you will pardon the pun-

Really fucking relaxing.

#this turned in to a #long post #sorry #asexuality #headcanons #this was a great ask Fyo thank you!#it was also...unexpectedly difficult it got me thinking about a lot of different things #...potentially part of the reason I actually have so few ace headcanons is because there are so few characters who aren't coded as being wi #now i think about it for a bit longer

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obxlife · 4 years

Text

Feelings (Rafe x Reader)

A/N: So since I had so many Rafe requests I decided to combine them! I hope that’s fine with everyone that requested! Also, this story happens before episode 1!! Just keep that in mind. I just realized I didn’t completely follow the request! I’m so sorry! I don't really know how to change it so that it can fit the request :(

Pairing: Rafe x Reader

Word count: 3,107

Request 1: could do write something about rafe? i know he's a dick but i kinda like him. i think he's only bad because of his dad and he's truly kind on the inside :/

Request 2: Maybe Rafe and the reader are at the same party at The Boneyard and he dips off to be by himself and she notices and tries to ask if he’s okay - but he’s tries to play it off like nothing and she offers herself up if he needs anyone to talk to. Later on he decides to find her and confide in her and they spend the night talking and stuff??? Hmm idk not sure if that made sense 😂

Warnings: Alcohol, swearing, daddy issues (lol)

FEELINGS

The keggers at the Boneyard had started again. You had received a text on your phone from Scarlet, who said a friend of a friend of a friend had told her that John B Routledge and his friends had been and were headed down towards the beach.

You called Sarah up at once, knowing that she would most definitely go.

You listened to the tone beep twice before the phone was picked up.

“Hey, Sarah,” you greeted.

“This isn’t Sarah,” a deep voice said, which you identified at once.

“Hey, Rafe,” you said more hesitantly.

It was well known around Figure Eight that you and Rafe did not get along. At all.

The year you had been born, a large group of Kook moms that got along had decided that their upcoming children would all be friends. This meant hanging out with Scarlet, Sarah, Kelce, Topper, and many more Kookish kids every single day. By the time you were all five, you thought you were best friends forever. And you were. Just not forever.

It was around that same age that Rafe began to tease you. He was a big eight-year-old kid who liked bugging his sister and pushing her around a bit for fun. And in turn, that meant he bothered you.

In the beginning, it wasn’t anything serious. You actually found it a bit funny. It would be simple things like tugging your hair softly until you got annoyed at him, or just poking you enough times to make you storm out of the room.

“Rafe!” you would shriek, which would always make him laugh.

But then Rafe had pushed it too far.

It was the middle of summer between fourth and fifth grade, which meant Rafe was about to go into his last year of middle school. You had been hanging around the Cameron house that afternoon, watching movies with Sarah, cooped up in her room.

More specifically you had been watching Jaws (which looking back now looked completely fake but back then had been terrifying). Because of this, when you and your friend had walked down to the dock where Rafe and his friends were, you most definitely did not want to jump in the water.

“We just don’t want to, Rafe.”

But Rafe wasn’t having any of it. He wanted both of you to stop being boring. Especially you. He thought you were the funniest person to have around. So when you had stopped paying attention to him, Rafe sneaked up behind you and pushed you right into the water.

You freaked the fuck out.

When your face emerged from the water, tears and snot were running down your face as you tried to pull yourself onto the dock again. However, Rafe, encouraged by his laughing friends, tore your fingers away from the ladder and continued to push you back in.

Sarah tried to step forward and help you out, but one of Rafe’s friend, Jason, was holding her back, having a laugh at how scared you were.

“You are such a crybaby,” they were screaming out. Finally, Sarah managed to break free from Jason’s grasp and ran towards the ladder, pushing Rafe into the ocean and tugging you onto land. She grabbed one of the boy’s towel and began to help you dry off.

Tears were still on your face as Rafe emerged from the water. Staring at you he began to feel guilty, but he wasn’t about to show that around his friends. He was too cool for that.

He pushed himself onto the dock where his friends were still teasing you and tried to apologize through his eyes.

You didn’t notice. All you could think about was the humiliation you had gone through. So as quickly as Rafe stepped back onto the dock, you turned around and left, only followed by Sarah. Behind you, you could hear everyone still making fun of you.

“What a crybaby,” they teased.

The next time you saw Rafe and his friends, they greeted you very differently than they had before.

“Hey, Crybaby.”

And just like that, you had been branded as ‘Crybaby’ to the whole preteen Kook community. And the worst part of it all, the nickname still lasted until this day.

“Hey, Crybaby,” came Rafe’s reply through the phone.

You hadn’t let the name bother you for a while now. Sarah had reassured you it was just a name, and that everybody knew you were much more than that. However, you were still pissed at Rafe for turning you into the laughing stock of the Kooks in your groupage.

“Can you put Sarah on the phone?”

Rafe made a sound that sounded similar to a whimper. “I’m offended you don’t want to talk to me!”

You sighed before stating flatly, “Rafe, I haven’t wanted to talk to you ever since you made the ‘Crybaby’ thing happen.”

Rafe laughed a little before saying, “What? I thought you loved being called ‘Crybaby’.”

“Ha, ha,” you belted out sarcastically. “Where did you even get that idea, Rafe?”

Now it was the boy’s turn to sigh. “Fine, I’ll put Sarah on the phone.”

As Rafe stood up to search for Sarah (she had left her phone on the kitchen counter), he tried to ignore the guilt he felt about your whole situation. He had branded you as ‘Crybaby’ and he had never even said sorry despite how he felt.

“Just forget it, bro,” Jason would tell him when he voiced his thoughts out. “She’s probably super over it, anyways.”

Rafe would only shake his head and say, “I don’t think so, man.”

“Dude,” Jason would groan out. “It’s not like everybody thinks she’s really a crybaby. I mean, everybody knows how badass she is.”

Rafe wouldn't look at him, but continue staring straight ahead.

“Rafe, the name just stuck. Sort of like a nickname. Chill.”

But Rafe could never get you completely out of his mind.

Reaching Sarah’s room, he knocked on the door (he did this ever since he had once walked in on her and Topper making out). Once he heard Sarah answer, he opened the door and tossed her the phone that he had been clutching between his fingers.

“It’s Y/N.”

He closed the door behind him and stomped to his room. Sometimes he would wonder if the reason you never left his mind was that he was guilty about you or if it was something else.

As you finished relaying to Sarah what Scarlet had told you she agreed, on the condition that they could get ready at her house because she had some things to do before you the party.

“Yeah, sure,” you replied. “Just make sure Rafe stays off my ass.”

She laughed. “Will do.”

***************************************************

You were not in a comfortable position. However, you were too lazy to move.

“Sarah!” you shouted up the stairs. “Hurry up! We’re like super late.”

From beside you, Topper squeezed his temples. “God, Y/N. Do you have to be so loud?”

You rolled your eyes, knowing he was prissy because Sarah had been acting out recently and he didn't want her to do that.

Suddenly, you heard steps coming down the stairs. You stood up, brushing off your outfit (which you were totally rocking) and turning towards the door.

“C’mon, Princess,” you called out to her but were surprised to see hear a deep voice answer.

“Is she still not ready?” Rafe asked looking at Topper, who just shook his head.

“Ugh,” you groaned. “What are you doing here?”

Rafe shrugged, looking into your eyes with a teasing smile. “I’m going to the party with you guys.”

You rolled your eyes again, exhausted from having dealt with him for two seconds already.

“Relax, Crybaby,” he teased. “Or are you going to start crying about it?”

You glared at Rafe, and he thought he might just combust from the heat in your eyes. Rafe raised his arms and made a funny face as if to indicate he would back off.

And then, finally, Sarah trudged into the room. Noticing the tension in the air, she turned directly to the door and called out for the rest to follow her.

The drive to the party was awkward, but a song had played on the radio as if to try to cover it up. Rafe and Top were in the front, as you checked your Instagram stories, showing one to the blonde girl beside you every once in a while.

When you arrived at the beach you jumped out of the car before Rafe had even pulled to a stop.

“Hey,” he called out, but you didn't turn around.

Once at the beach, you headed towards the center of the crowd of teenagers, where you recognized a couple of faces.

For a Kook, you got on surprisingly well with Kiara Carrera and her friends, even if you were still close to Sarah.

“Hey,” you smiled at them JJ, a blond boy with blue eyes, already began to move towards the plastic cups so that you could have a drink.

“Hey, Y/N!” Pope said. That was what you liked about them. They had never, not once, called you ‘Crybaby’. It was a break from your everyday life.

“You guys been busy, tonight?” you wondered as John B took the cup from JJ and filled it to the brim with beer.

They all nodded as Kie said, “Busiest party all summer, that’s for sure.”

“Nice!” you said before taking a big gulp of your drink. “Are you staying here the whole night?”

JJ shook his head. “I’m going over there right now,” he pointed towards a group of Tourons. You let out a laugh before turning to the rest of your acquaintances. You cocked an eyebrow.

“Nah,” John B answered instead. We’ll probably leave now that you’re here.”

You placed on an offended mask but knew exactly what he meant. If you were there, the rest of the Kooks were too, meaning that a fight was sure to rise if they clashed.

“I get it,” you told them before looking around. “Well, I’ll be off. I really want to dance.”

And with that, you left towards the dance floor.

It wasn’t until you were three beers in and two hours of dancing later that you noticed Sarah and Rafe off towards the side of the Boneyard. You began to approach them to see if something was wrong. However, before you could reach them, Sarah had stormed off into Topper’s arms.

You froze, about to go back to the party until you noticed Rafe taking a seat at an even greater distance from the Boneyard than where he had been fighting with Sarah.

You had an internal fight with yourself but finally decided to listen to your guilt and just check on Rafe. God, why am I so nice? you thought.

You threw your cup into one of the many recycling bins that were littered across the beach (courtesy of Kie) before approaching the boy you knew so well. Taking a seat beside him, you pulled your knees up to your chest and asked, “What’s up?”

Rafe scoffed at you before muttering “Nothing.”

It wasn’t a surprise that you sighed, annoyed, at Rafe. “Look,” you began, “I saw you fighting with Sarah and I came here trying to be nice. I’m here if you want to talk.”

Rafe remained silent.

“You better hurry,” you said teasingly, “Because there’s this guy that was flirting with me and I would really like to get back to that.”

His lips turned up a little at the joke you made (he had been staring at you all night and he knew you hadn't talked to anybody). But he remained silent.

After another moment passed you began to stand up.

“It’s my dad.”

You froze for a little while before moving back into your previous position.

“Okay,” you said softly. “What about him?”

Rafe brought a hand up to rub his eyes and then pushed it through his hair. He looked a bit sad and annoyed. And hurt. You had never seen him as vulnerable as right now.

“He just - he puts a lot of pressure on me.”

You nodded, relating to that. “Well, my dad does that too. But he only wants what’s best for me.”

Rafe shook his head. “That’s the thing. It’s not what is best for me.”

You remained quiet before shifting closer to him and gently placing a hand on his back.

Rafe leaned into your hand, then said, “He pressures me so much. Like so fucking much. And it’s into his business, which isn't even what I want to do with my life!”

Not knowing what to say, you continued moving your hand up and down, and placed your other hand near his shoulder.

“He wants me to do everything perfectly and he wants me to do so many things that sometimes are just out of my control.”

You nodded, showing him you were listening. “Have you talked to him about it?”

Now Rafe nodded. “I did,” he confirmed. “But he just won't listen. And I just wish he would pay enough attention to see -”

His voice broke. And you heard him choke on a sob and you saw a tear stream down his cheek.

“Why can’t he see me? Why doesn’t he love me the way he loves Sarah?”

Your heart was clenching tightly in your chest, and you began to move out of instinct. You straddled his lap and wrapped one arm around his back and the other one nestled around his head, bringing it down onto your shoulder. You felt his tears fall upon your exposed skin, as sniffles escaped through his nostrils and his arms slowly came around your torso.

You rubbed his back as softly as you could. “Shh! It’s okay, it’s okay.”

Your reassurances were worth nothing to him. “It’s not!” he exclaimed into your hair. Then, in a whisper, “It’s not.”

Not knowing what to say you remained silent. You both stayed silent for the longest time, and all you could hear were his sniffles, the cool ocean air whooshing by, and the sound of the party that seemed so far away.

Finally building your courage up to say something, you pulled back and took his face into his hands.

“Rafe,” you began. “I want you to listen to me, okay?”

He nodded.

“You are worth loving, okay?” you told him. “And just because you feel your dad doesn’t love you does not mean that you are not deserving and worthy of love.”

Rafe continued to stare at you. You simply continued.

“One day, you will find someone that loves you so, so much that they will prove to you that you are all of those things I've just said, okay? And I want you to know that there are people that love you, right now.”

Rafe was shocked into silence from what you said. “Who?”

“Sarah does, even if she doesn’t show it. And Wheezie. And Jason loves you, even if he is the biggest dick of the century.”

Rafe laughed a little at this, and you joined him.

“And I love you,” you spoke out. And you did. Because no matter how much you pretended to hate him and ignore him and all of those things, you would always care for him. “Even if I’m the biggest bitch of the century and won't show it.”

Rafe laughed out loud this time, joining in on your joke. When both of you stopped, you were serious again.

“I’m sorry if I contributed to making you feel this way.”

The boy in your hands shook his head before moving to your wrists and removing them from his face. He hugged you again and sighed in relief, feeling a lot better than he did before.

“I’m sorry,” he whispered out. You rubbed his back.

“For what?”

“For the whole ‘Crybaby’ thing,” he explained. “I’ve felt guilty ever since, Y/N. And I don’t know why it took me so long to say sorry, but I really am.”

You laughed at him “I don't care about the nickname anymore, Rafe. I was mad at you over the fact that you never apologized. But you have now.”

Rafe smiled softly before you spoke once again, “But you did kind of ruin my life.”

The sarcasm dripping from your voice made him laugh once again. You pulled back and smiled at him again.

“C’mon,” you cocked your head towards the party. “Let’s go back and have some fun.”

Rafe thought it was a wonderful idea, and he waited for you to stand up before moving himself.

He took the hand you offered to him and stood up, almost crashing into you because of the speed he stood up with.

You laughed once again, adjusting your top and looking at him again. His eyes were at the party, more specifically Sarah. The anxiousness that had been invading his eyes before was coming back, so you squeezed his hand.

He looked down at you. The smile on his lips made him smile, and suddenly he felt his impulsiveness push through his common sense. Dipping down, he quickly pressed his lips to yours. Before you could respond (mainly due to shock at his actions and the butterfly feelings in your stomach) he had pulled away.

Oh, I’ve fucked this up, was the only thought on his mind. But when you just smiled at him, his worries left with the wind. The same wind that was moving the tips of your hair around.

Together, the both of you trudged back to the party. Rafe felt happier than ever, and you felt as if all of those years “hating” him had been a waste of time.

You couldn’t believe he had always been right in front of you, and because of your blind rage, he hadn't noticed how sweet and innocent and childlike he truly was.

Regret flooded your insides for a second, but the feeling left when you thought that maybe it had been something necessary. To hate him before loving him again.

Suddenly he stopped and turned towards you.

“I never said it back,” he stated, dumbfoundedly.

“What?”

“I love you too, Y/N.”

You giggled at him and then asked, “What? No ‘Crybaby’?”

Rafe shook his head. “Nope. Not this time.”

You frowned, jokingly. “I was getting used to the ‘Crybaby’.”

Rafe scoffed saying. “No, you weren’t.”

You laughed loudly this time. “Yeah, I wasn’t.”

With that, you both entered the Boneyard once again, but this time, hand in hand, and with a different relationship than before.

#outer banks #obx #obx netflix #rafe cameron #rafe cameron x reader #drew starkey

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