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#friendship grows like a flower
0reblogufufu0 · 20 days
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Happy Birthday to the loveliest of friends, @snoobins <3
Twin stars
A universe apart
Just close enough
To wistfully gaze at the other
Knowing yet not
How fate will lead them together
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kakusu-shipping · 2 months
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I feel like a lot of the moodboards I've been making recently are really dark, both in terms of colors and just general Vibe.
So here's one for Lillie to brighten things up!
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cimicherrychanga · 10 months
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ngl, modelling yourself after an anime boy makes me uncomfortable in an east asian fetishizing kind of way....
HUH????
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YOU MEAN THESE FUCKING ANIME BOYS??????????? ARE THESE THE ANIME CHARACTERS WHO LOOK LIKE ME THAT LED YOU TO SAY IM BASING MY IDENTITY OFF OF THEM FOR FETISHISTIC REASONS???
ANON LOOK ME IN THE FUCKING EYES ( under all this hair) AND TELL ME WHAT YOUR THOUGHT PROCESS WAS
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balladetto · 5 months
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mister magic / accepting / @riiese ( Ingvar )
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"I wish I had more to offer you than I do."
     There's something like a pattern to it. It's usually the people who've lost a lot who tend to want to do this: trying to give you more than what you asked for, even if you didn't ask for anything at all. Link doesn't know what it is Ingvar's lost, not completely, but he thinks he's familiar enough with how it feels that he can recognise how it looks.
     Maybe he's wrong. Maybe he's right. The flowers by his feet still bloom, full and radiant and reaching for his knees, and Ingvar still wishes like he isn't the nicest thing in these fields right now.
     Sunlight pours over them like a blanket against the wind. The air itself is sweet on Link's tongue as he runs fingers over soft petals, delight swelling up and up from the bottom of his heels the way the buds have sprouted. It hadn't been a request. Just a story shaped from uprooted memories he'd quietly shared to lessen the weight of them, but— here this big kindness is, anyway.
     Here it is, grown for him, anyway.
     Link smiles wide and shakes his head hard, 'cause he needs his companion to see and know this. He straightens from where he's crouched in those blossoms, hands jittery with emotion but insistent with purpose as he signs, "It's good! Very good, thank you!"
     There's a pause while he jumps from one incomplete motion to another, as though unable to work out which word it is he wants to say, before he settles for, "Like it, like it, I like it!"
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mammonsrockstargf · 17 days
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It starts small. You honestly don't think much of it. Crows begin leaving you gifts in your window frame. It's pretty rocks. It's a small screw. It's coins and grimm, it's a button from a shirt, it's shiny beads.
You bring it up to Mammon randomly one day. He stares at you wide-eyed. "What, you mean crowns leave ya gifts? Sound ridiculous," he says and you shrug.
"I mean, I've heard about crows leaving gifts for humans before. It's not that unusual, but usually, the humans give something to the crows in return," you say, thinking aloud. "That's the part that confuses me. I haven't given anything to the crows, so why do they like me so much?" Mammon's cheeks are bright red by now, the blush going all the way down his neck. Your brows furrow with concern.
"Hey, are you okay?" you ask and he nods quickly. "Yeah, 'm fine, gotta-go-see-ya! " he stutters and quickly leaves you, practically running away. You look after him in confusion. Weren't you both just supposed to be headed home?
The gifts continue. You get a single earring. At one point you get a small bone and at another time you get a tooth which leaves you a bit unsettled but also intrigued. You treasure every single gift, keeping it in a small box by your desk. You begin to leave the crows gifts in return. You find that they like peanuts and berries. One time you experimentally leave a big piece of watermelon, only to find it devoured within minutes.
The next day there's a pretty locket with what looks like a flower engraved in it. You gape at the locket and instantly put it on, proudly wearing it around your neck. You make sure to leave the crows a feast that day.
Satan is the first brother to notice it when it slips out from the collar of your uniform one day. "Is that new?" he asks. "Oh yeah, I've befriended a bunch of crows." Satan stops in his tracks and stares at you.
"You've befriended crows?" He repeats and you nod. "Yes. Why is everyone so weird about this?" A knowing smile creeps onto his face and he shakes his head.
"Why do you think the crows like you so much?" he asks. You hum, considering it for a second. Eventually, you have to draw a blank and look at Satan in defeat. His smile only grows wider.
"Ask Mammon. He might know."
You find Mammon in his room, lying in his bed. He smiles when he sees you and pats the bed, motioning you to come over. "Come here," he says and you do, lying down next to him. He huffs and pulls at you so you're lying on his chest. You can feel his heart beating and you look up at him through your lashes.
"Hey, Mamms," you say and he runs his hand down your back, rubbing circles into it. "Hey, treasure," he says and grins.
"Satan says you might know the cause of my new friendships." His cheeks turn crimson in an instant and he lets out something akin to a nervous laugh. "Oh, the crows, you mean?" you huff and playfully roll your eyes. "Come on, big guy, spill the beans," you say and Mammon sighs.
"So, the crows like you, because, well, I told them about you," he says and a grin spreads across your face. "Go on," you say.
"Okay, I have crow familiars, you know what a familiar is, right?" he says and looks at you expectantly. You rake your brain, remembering briefly having about it in one of your classes. "Yeah, it's like witches with black cats, right?" you say and Mammon hums.
"Yeah, kind of, but anyone can have a familiar and it can be any animal. The whole black cat thing is just something the catholic church made up." You nod in understanding while Mammon continues to rub patterns into your back. The beating of his heart seems to have become louder underneath you. "So what you're saying is you can't shut up about how awesome I am and now a bunch of crows are obsessed with me?" you say and Mammon hides his face in his hands. You giggle and pry his hands away, smiling at him adoringly.
"Please don't make fun of me," he huffs and you pout at his antics. "I could never tease my lovely little bird boy," you coo and Mammon groans while pushing you off him. He turns his back to you and you laugh manically. "Come on, Mamms, It's cute," you say and press soft kisses to the nape of his neck. "you're cute," you say and throw an arm and a leg over him, attempting to spoon him. You feel him instantly melting to your touch, completely unable to keep his resolve. It's almost too easy when he turns around again to face you. You smile at his pink face.
"I really like the gifts the crows gave me," you reassure him because you genuinely do. It's become something you look forward to when you open your window.
"You do?"
"Yeah, absolutely," you affirm and he smiles sheepishly. "I once tried to train them to steal money for me, but it didn't work."
a/n: thanks for reading! find my other stuff here <3
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tbko111 · 3 months
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Wolf in Sheep's Clothing
⊱ contents: yuta x fem reader, smut, noncon/dubcon, yandere, delusion, obsession, masturbation, stalking, virginity loss, mind break, creampie, manipulation, ⊱ wc: 2.6k ⊱ synopsis: There was just something about your friend Yuta that slowly urged you to let your guard down. Maybe it was his gentle nature, or his softspoken voice. Either way, you trusted him into your dorm room.
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Yuta has spent years of his life shying away from intimacy. Inevitably he has masturbated at times, but was never big on it. Once he entered high school – festering with amorous teenagers, he still didn’t give it much mind.
That was until he met you.
It started off small. Being quiet, people would find you hard to approach, but Yuta felt otherwise.
"You dropped this." you muttered, holding out an eraser. Yuta blinked for a moment, surprised to hear your voice for the first time. It was like honey – easy on the ears. It even made him wonder why you don’t talk more.
"Oh, thank you." he smiled.
You awkwardly smiled back. It was his first time getting a clear look at you, and he thought about it for the rest of the day. He only thought you were kind of pretty, nothing more. Or so he told himself; he was too convinced he wouldn't find love again.
But the two of you surprisingly shared a lot in common, easing into conversations over time. It started as a normal friendship, but love waits for no one, and he couldn't help but start to admire your every detail. Your every move, every habit, every word… so thoughtful and reserved. It was tantalizing. Only to this point you felt similarly, thinking he was intimidating at first but putting your guard down at his unexpectedly sweet and sensitive personality.
It was spring, just the right amount of breezy and students abustle over the romance in the air. You had known Yuta for quite some time now, being comfortable enough to give gifts - albeit not too forward.
After school, you remain seated as your classmates race eachother to the exit. Yuta takes note of this and stays back as well.
"Are you not going?"
You fidget, then reach into your bag.
"Here, you can have this." you held out a small box of cookies. Adorned with small flowers to complement the season. He stared for a moment before accepting it.
"You remembered my birthday?" Yuta beamed, touched. 
"Um... I just made too much yesterday." you chuckle, not daring to make eye contact. But he knew it was no coincidence. It was singlehandedly the best cookies he's had in his life, and he later lost sleep recalling your abashed face.
The more he got to know you, the stronger his feelings got. He wanted to know more. To feel more. You would only offer small joking pokes, or touch him accidentally which were always followed by apologies. He would calm his beating heart secretly wishing you wouldn't pull back all the time.
In the dead of summer, the two of you sat in front of a convenience store. Licking your ice cream carefully, you looked to the side to see Yuta blush and turn away. You suddenly grow embarrassed of the display, and cover your mouth.
"You want some too? I have change." you glance at him gingerly, trying to ease the air.
"What? Oh. No, I'm fine." Yuta lets air in through his collar, quickly looking away again. Something tells you he's not this worked up from the weather.
That night he touched himself for the first time in ages.
"Hahh... Y/n... Y/n... Y/n..." 
Yuta mumbles to himself, twitching at his own touch. He rubs his length up and down with thoughts of you playing in his head like a movie. Your gaze, your voice, your everything, how you'd look so pretty with your lips wrapped around his cock, and how you'd look when he finally gets to fuck you and see your face melt into a pleasured mess, all for him.
"Fuck..." he inhales, climaxing at the thought.
Eventually, unable to get his mind off of you, he would steal small belongings as mementos of you, even touching himself with your handkerchief. It felt like a crime. This is wrong. I'm sick. He tried to tell himself, but as if in withdrawal from a drug, he'd cave into ogling you at every chance. No girl has made him feel this way before.
Pleasure finally overtook his guilt over fantasizing such vile things. He'd follow you at night "Just to make sure you're safe", and always keep an eye on you. He didn't have to worry about seeming creepy to you; he was all too good at putting up a front. To the point you only ever saw him as a kind friend, nothing more.
You've grown a soft spot for him and he didn't mind taking advantage of it. Yuta had always been nothing short of generous, but even he had his limits. Especially when it came to such an insatiable need.
By the time you trusted him, your every kind gesture became an indicator that you must like him back, justifying everything under that pretense.
It was winter before you knew it – roughly a year since you've met Yuta. You offered to do homework at your dorm room, and his pulse nearly stopped at the suggestion. He tried to sound casual, agreeing a little too quick.
"Come in, there's not much to see, but..." you welcome him in, taking off your shoes. He breathes in, almost going lightheaded from how your scent surrounds him.
You take off your coat, then your school blazer, the dress shirt framing your figure with more definition making him gulp and turn away.
Unloading your things and settling down, you help eachother with questions within the warmth of your room. There's about an hour of silent working – though it takes everything in Yuta to focus, until you stretch and groan complaining about the workload. One joke here and there turns into full procrastination as the two of you laugh quietly at trivial conversations.
At one point, you gently slap him on the arm, snapping what remained of his self-restraint. The giggles die down, and coming to your senses you find Yuta eyeing you shyly.
"Y/n..."
"Hm?"
The room is falling dark. You hadn't bothered to turn on the lights, and the daylight was beginning to fade away.
He leans in, making you pull away just slightly. But he won't let you do that this time. You were so cute that rational thought was flying out the window. All he knew was that you both wanted this.
He swallows, then snakes his hand up the back of your head, leaning in until your lips meet. For a moment you’re resistless, frozen in shock. Soon you’re quick to push him away, feeling your face burning up.
“Wait, Yuta, I didn't know y-”
Yuta finds your shocked face cute, but soon grows impatient and coaxes you back with a groan. He might just die if he keeps his hands off for any longer.
"If you really don’t want it, you can bite my tongue." he breathes, not even giving you room to respond. He knows you wouldn't, anyway.
He starts off with a small kiss. Running one hand down your arm with the other caressing the side of your head. You gasp, allowing him to slide his tongue in – desperate to taste you. The wet sounds make your head reel, but of course you don't bite. Despite being reluctant, you can't bring yourself to hurt him. You only groan softly, and feel Yuta purr into you like he’s in heaven.
He keeps you in place with an alarming amount of authority. The kiss grows hot and sloppy. It’s hard to think as he lifts you with surprising ease and lays you on your bed - conveniently close to your floor desk due to lack of space. He finds his way atop of you, one knee resting comfortably between your legs. You try to push away for air, and he lets you, only to start kissing your neck and down.
“Ah… Yuta, what-” your voice wobbles.
He shifts to loom over you completely, breathing erratic and needy. He continues to leave marks, feeling your body as if dying to memorize it by touch. Despite every alarm in your head going off, you don't want to believe that Yuta is a threat.
The affirmation is cut short when you jolt at the feeling of him unbuttoning your top.
“W- Wait!”
Yuta had held back for too long. He's been nothing but good to you. He deserved this – you deserved this. Having none of you was endurable, but just a taste was never going to be enough. All he got from your protests was that you were just shy. How cute.
“I’m sorry, I need you. I’ll make you feel good, I promise…” he’s murmuring, telling himself that more than anything.
He opens your shirt delicately, revealing your bra, and your arms fly up to cover yourself.
He steadily casts them aside to awe at your figure. His gaze lingers for uncomfortably long with bated breath.
“You’re so…” he trails off, lovestruck.
Your eyes meet his, and you can't help but look away. You've never let anyone see you so vulnerable before. He dips his head down to continue tasting your neck, and you feel him fumble to remove your bra. You tug at his clothes in place of asking him to stop, but it only tempts him more.
He finally removes it and puts it aside, shaking slightly at the sensation of your bare breast. Starting off with just his fingertips, he grows greedy and kneads them, carefully, as if you’re made out of glass. He’s nice as always – misleadingly so. You groan and pull your legs together as he teases your nipple, and grabbing his wrist with your weakened arms proves useless. 
His hand travels down your body, each touch torturously tender.
A finger hooks on your now semi-unzipped skirt and stockings, undressing you like you're a precious gift. Yuta timidly runs his fingers over your panties, a grin creeping on his face at the dampness.
You feel your heart drop as you sense him undoing his pants. You look down with wide eyes to see him pull out his length. Being inexperienced, just the thought of that entering sent a foreboding chill down your spine.
“No...” You're too scared to even raise your voice.
Yuta sighs shakily, face flushed.
“Stop being such a tease. You’re killing me…”
His rough yet pretty hand pulls down your garments slowly, making you attempt to draw your thighs together at the sudden airflow.
He lines himself up to your entrance, and you curse yourself for being wet. You try to shrink back, but gasp when he holds you by the waist, lifting you slightly for better access. His tip pokes your slit, making you shudder and stifle a sob. Even now, you can’t bring yourself to slap him, or scream.
Yuta isn’t a bad person.
You shake your head, hands firm on his arms to no avail.
He marvels at the sight, in a trance.
“I’ll be gentle.”
“No, Yuta, don’t-!”
You cut yourself off with a guttural shriek as he forces himself in, inch by inch. You gasp for air as you claw at your sheets fruitlessly.
He takes a moment to settle, groaning as your muscles contract frantically.
“Ahh… oh, god, you feel even better than I thought…” Yuta tilts his head back, screwing his eyes shut in bliss.
To your dismay his cock goes even deeper, until you can feel him in your stomach. You gasp for air, moaning pathetically as every nerve screams for help.
"Mngh, no, i- it hurts-"
Yuta groans, getting even more turned on.
The pretty sight of you twitching around him alone threatened to make him cum right then and there.
"It's okay. I'll go slow..."
He starts moving, painstakingly slow. Somehow, him being so gentle is worse than being forceful. You’re left with no choice but to fully suffer through every little sensation.
Even as he goes at a leisurely pace, you can't help but fight back tears. It's also torturous for him, but for different reasons. He cares about you too much to fuck you as brutally as he'd like.
There are only timid movements for a long while, until he gradually picks up speed, and your legs are on the verge of giving up already.
"You're so pretty." He mumbles.
You cover your face, unable to answer. Your lip is bitten to suppress shameful noises, but the crude fill in your stomach makes your jaw weaken.
Your mouth hangs open, and soon the room fills with lewd noises as he continues to shower you with affection. He babbles barely coherent compliments, kissing your neck. He winces slightly at your tightness, clenching around him with all your life.
“Relax for me.”
You sputter into your arms. You're a moaning, flinchy mess and your legs shake like a leaf as he loses himself in you – slowly going faster and harder.
"...Let me see your face."
You groan, unrelenting, but the way his eyes bore into you has you complying meekly. He leers, pleased with the display.
"Look at you… you love me. You take me so well."
His familiar smile almost convinces you that nothing is wrong.
"Say it. I wanna hear it from you."
He bucks his hips in deep, going almost fully in and out, earning violent twitches followed by helpless moans. It's music to his ears.
As you very slowly ease into the feeling, what remained of your fighting spirit diminishes as his cock fills you just too right, involuntarily arching your back. Your sounds grow more harmonic as euphoria washes over your body.
He whispers breathily, pleading so weakly in spite of the power he has over you.
"Please?"
"I love you..." you drawl, barely words at all. Your once pained face is now melted in pleasure; pupils blown and eyes barely open.
Yuta smiles, sickly sweet.
"Good girl, I love you too. I love you so much. I'm yours..."
His dark eyes make you shudder as he looks at you - looking almost coy as if having his nervous first kiss and not fucking you into your own bed. You feel high as he continues to thrust into you using your waist as a handle. His kind voice and affectionate teasing with his thumbs contrasts all else.
Feeling every sense overstimulate, sinful moans freely escaping your mouth, you weakly reach out to hold him.
"Ahh, Yu..."
“You feel so good, I- fuck,”
Yuta curses under his breath – you never even thought he was capable. But neither did you of this whole situation.
You're no longer in control of what kind of vulgar face you may make. You feel burning ecstasy build up inside, until you’re dangerously close.
"Mngh- Yuta...! I can't, I..."
"Shh, I got you." 
His sweet voice hypnotizes you to relax, not even letting you register the gravity of him cumming inside. His breath hitches harshly and the grip on your waist tightens, as if to say you're not going anywhere.
Your eyes roll back, feeling him paint your walls white. You feel his cock so clearly, you're convinced you've memorized its shape. Your body shudders in pleasure and in that moment, you truly are convinced he's the love of your life.
“Ah… mmn… ugh,”
You lay twitching in place, small moans emitting as you breathe. You can hardly even remember where you are.
He stays inside for moments longer, savoring the moment. You tighten instinctively as he pulls out slowly with a cute smile plastered on his face.
“You’re amazing.'' He's breathless, either from the sex or breathtaken by you alone. He kisses you, stroking your hair lovingly.
And you can’t help but kiss back.
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♡ ao3
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faerociousbeast · 1 year
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they changed the one sakura ino scene too 😭😭
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sakurarisen · 2 years
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♡ + belonging
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Send a ♡  and a word for a headcanon!
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Belonging
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If there’s anything Sera truly wants and doesn’t realize until well after it happens, it’s a place to belong. She’s had aquantinces, she’s got friends... She’s never had a place or home to call her own, let alone somewhere where she fits in. This is something she finds in Zack and the friends she makes along the way, but it’s not until just before the Nibelheim Incident she realizes this, when she discovers she’s gotten bold enough to tease and play around without fearing the worst for something as small as speaking. She’s found a home. Her place to belong.
And then it’s ripped away, completely so a year later when she’s forced to leave Midgar with an infant Shayan.
Even four years later, she’s still trying to reclaim that feeling and is slowly getting there, especially with her Remake verse and the ability to bring her family back together and settle down with them, but it’s been slow to realize it’s back - Or getting back to that point, at least, given the new hurdles and stresses in the way. But that feeling of belonging... It’s something she craves and is only starting to feel comfortable with admitting she needs.
Having been alone for the majority of her life, shown the darker side of the world and the people in it, admitting a want has never been something she could allow herself to do until she’s 17, nearing 18, and admitting she wants somewhere to be even less so. Wants were bad, she’d convinced herself, and so she didn’t have any until she was shown it’s okay to want... And even then, it still wasn’t one she realized until she noticed she’s bolder. Braver. More comfortable in her skin, and with herself.
Until she’d found her place to belong, and losing that, in full with no way to ever reclaim it or any tie to it like Shayan had been to ground her, would destroy her.
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euphoricfilter · 1 year
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Stardust || JJK
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Pairing: Jungkook x F. Reader
Genre: Fluff || Smut || Friends to Lovers au
Summary: If Jungkook would have known an unintentional orgasm would have led to this, then he would have begged you to work out with him sooner.
Word Count: 5.5k
Tags/ warnings: himbo-ish jk, so much fluff idk where it came from, smut in the forms of: unintentional masturbation turned coregasm, oral (f. receiving), fingering, protected sex (because that’s really cool), mirror sex, doggy style, technically multiple orgasms, they’re both giggly and in love it’s kinda gross, jk is a tits man, he’s obsessed with boobs, it’s all very tame and kinda soft ig
Notes: yay first fic of 2023. this was way harder to write than i’d anticipated, hopefully i pulled through. and if there’s mistakes, no there aren’t!
<3 thank you to my prettiest baby @4amj3zz for reading this atrocity before i posted it
my full masterlist
✯ ✯ ✯
If every living being’s foundation is made of stardust, scattered when born, then Jungkook thinks the two of you were made from the same star.
A friendship that’s near impossible to come by, crafted by the hands of a higher being— delicate fingertips moulding fickle personalities and emotions that seem incomplete when not together. Two angels sent to earth to be each others’ number one in another life they’ll spend together.
Precious, like naturally formed diamonds.
And maybe that’s what your friendship was, one of the world’s little treasures. One everyone yearns for, though only a select few have.
Sure, diamonds can be replicated, graphite turned jewelry, simply there for show. A statement piece if you must.
Fake diamonds and fake friendships that seem to be more common than the real deal. Hard to crack, though not impossible— splitting the two of you up into pitiful shards and lost pieces; where even the most skilled hands have trouble putting it back together.
Jungkook doesn’t remember life before you. Though he thinks it must have been dull, flimsy smiles, and friends that hadn’t bothered to call once they moved away.
His existence so easily forgotten, that the gnawing sadness didn’t seem to last as long as he’d anticipated. Simply walking the path of life alone, though he often thought solitude wasn’t all that bad.
Until your worlds had collided. The big bang of your friendship, a new world, a new start, everything so fresh and untampered with.
He’d thought about what life would be like if one day the two of you were to ever part ways, the very thought of you not being by his side like a harsh punch the gut.
And maybe he had gotten a little teary eyed on those evenings he felt a little softer, a little sadder at the thought of you ever leaving. His hands fumbling around his sheets for his phone, your voice his only remedy for his growing anxiety, where promises were whispered and sleepy smiles remained on your faces as you rested.
Jungkook doubts that day will ever come. And maybe that’s all just wishful thinking, a juvenile dream that the promise you’d made to one another would hold strong for the rest of time, until the two of you lay six feet under. Resting side by side until your bodies rot, flesh becoming one with the earth, what is left of your existence blossoming into something beautiful; perhaps a tree, a flower, truly anything, as long as you were together.
“Together?” you blink up at Jungkook through your lashes, eyebrows creasing in distaste.
Jungkook thinks you look pretty in that moment, even if you are pulling a face at him. The two of you sat at a bench in the park, your head haloed by the setting sun, last of the days warmth kissing both your skin in a gentle goodbye before the moon watches over the two of you.
Littles galaxies reflected in both your eyes, where Jungkook thinks each star in his represents one thing he loves about you; hidden behind the moonlight because he doubt yours represent the same.
“Yes” he nods, hair flopping a little over his forehead, and you push the stray strands out of his eyes. Fingers delicate as they brush over his skin, always so gentle with him that his heart flutters like the delicate wings of a butterfly.
“Kook, I love you— you know I do” and he nods, lips quirking up a little, “But working out just, isn’t for me” you conclude, tone firm and his shoulders deflate. Because he knows it’ll take more than glossy puppy eyes and a pout for you to give in.
“First off, I love you too—“
“Thank you” you nod. But Jungkook doesn’t think you understand the weight behind those words.
“And look, how do you know it’s not for you, if you’ve never tried?”
“You put me off” and Jungkook would have thought you were joking if you didn’t have that deadpan look on your face. One he was all too familiar with.
“Huh” he gawks, “How?”
“You always complain about sore muscles, and the thought of being sweaty grosses me out” your head tips forward dramatically, cushioned by your arms from the table.
“It’s a good ache” he watches you turn your head, lips moulded into an unconvinced pout as you stare up at him through your lashes.
“There is no such thing as a good ache, Jungkook”
“Is too”
“When?” you flail, unbothered as Jungkook’s hands wrap around your wrists.
“Sex ache”
You pause, “Excuse me?”
“You know?” he cocks his head to the side.
“No” you shake your head in utter disbelief.
Jungkook’s mouth falls open, “You’re a little pillow princess aren’t you, I bet you don’t do any of the work”
“Do too, besides—“ you swallow, “It’s none of your business” you pull your hands free of his grasp.
“Come on, I feel like we’re at a point in this relationship we can share these things” his cheek rests atop of your head, each syllable pulled out into a whine.
“I don’t wanna hear about your sex life, Jungkook” you huff.
You watch him sit up ramrod straight, brain whirring behind his eyes. You think that if he thought any harder you’d be able to hear the echo of his voice.
“Actually, I don’t really wanna hear about yours either” his nose scrunches up, melting your resolve.
A secret charm of his that he didn’t know he had; and you’d never tell him either, no way in hell would you let him weaponize your weakness against you when your heart could barely stand being sat so close to him.
“Best friends don’t always share everything” you quip, only it leaves a tangy taste on your tongue.
“I suppose” Jungkook nods, evidently less enthusiasm radiating off him.
Best friends. It always wet your mood. Like sour candy that’s too sour, or a cute dog that’s breath smells like a rotting carcass.
But that’s what you were, introductions to new classmates or new lovers; it was always best friends. Two simple words that felt like utter shit to say, tumbling past your lips like vomit and then you had to rawdog the aftertaste because you don’t have any toothpaste or mints nearby.
Never anything less, even though there was definitely a lot more going on between the two of you. (Not that either of you had any idea about that.)
It’s a wonder as to how neither of you had grasped the fact that every previous relationship the two of you had, had ended because of the other. Nothing ever seeming to fit in place, the click never being there when it came to someone else.
Communication is key in upholding a relationship of any kind, issues easily resolved with hours of conversation turned mutual understanding, and progression made with a mix of both actions and words. As two people whose love languages were physical touch, the former is just as important as the latter.
One of the only reasons your friendship has lasted this long, is that you both value each other enough to communicate when necessary.
Apart from when you could probably really use it, unidentifiable emotions weaving into your hearts, mixed with a dose of denial can really set you back when you’re near infatuated with your closest friend.
It’s not that either of you had never considered a relationship with one another, others outside your little bubble had brought it up enough times that the meager possibility of it actually happening had been cemented into your thick skulls.
Something nice tickling both your brains at the fact so many people thought you were together together; like, in love together.
Long gone were the days where you’d blurt out your denial to dating accusations with rose dusted cheeks, simply believing the world had a thing against opposite sex friendships. Now, the two of you just laughed off whoever liked to comment on how good you looked as a couple. (Which had brought more than a few of Jungkook’s relationships to turmoil)
It’s just that neither of you believed the other wanted anything more than friendship. A rookie mistake on both your parts, especially when you’d both establish that every and all emotions were to be discussed with one another, no matter what you felt.
“One time” you break the silence, any way to ease the growing tension between the two of you “I’ll work out with you one time. And never again”
You watch the smile as it pulls at the corner of his lips, the prettiest smile, your favorite smile, enough of a reward for whatever pain you’re about to put yourself through. Because as long as Jungkook was happy, then you’d crawl to the ends of the earth if it meant you got to see this smile one more time.
“I love you” he bends down, sloppy kiss pressed to your cheek and you can’t help your own smile, heated cheeks covered as you swat him away from your face. Wiping his saliva from your skin with the back of your hand.
“Whatever” you tut, though Jungkook sees through your faux annoyance.
“We can use my at-home gym as well, so we won’t even be in public”
“Wonderful. Let’s go back now, I’m gonna freeze my tits off if we stay any later”
You don’t catch Jungkook’s gaze flickering down to your chest, lingering a little longer than proper before he’s slinging his zip-up hoodie around your shoulders. Eyes flickering down to his hands briefly before he’s knocking shoulders with you.
“Chivalry isn’t dead” you utter, falling into Jungkook’s side when his arm falls over your shoulder.
✯ ✯ ✯
Jeon Jungkook was sex on legs when he worked out.
You were no stranger to him training, countless vacations together, where the morning was spent with him doing press-up on the balcony or the occasional few times he’d bench-press you for a laugh.
You’d never found it funny though, pussy throbbing between your thighs as he’d grab onto you, arms flexing deliciously. And he never seemed to question why you’d lock yourself up in your room after, purely a coincidence that you’d disappear for an hour after his little stunt.
You were no stranger to a half naked Jungkook either.
Nor were you a juvenile teenager whose panties got in a twist when she saw a toned stomach.
However, this wasn’t just any toned stomach.
Jeon Jungkook was built like Adonis. Carved where every crevice had meaning and every flaw only enhanced his beauty. And it’s hard to think the bushy haired, acne prone teen boy you’d first befriended had turned into this.
If puberty had benefited anyone, it was Jungkook.
“We’ll do something easy today, okay?” he claps and you nod, watching as he saunters over to a basket.
“Pink or blue” he holds up two yoga mats.
“I didn’t think you were into rhinestones” you snort, sun catching on the bedazzled rim of the pink mat— streaks of pink painting the wall.
Jungkook drops said mat, chucking you the blue one before he’s dropping to his knees on the floor.
“It’s one of my exes” he tells you, motioning for you to sit.
If people were flowers, then this is the moment you would have wilted. Deflating in on yourself; it’s not that you were jealous per-say. It’s not like him and his ex were dating at all but still. The very mention of her was enough for you to roll your eyes.
“And you didn’t throw it out?” the words hurdle out your mouth before you can even think about what you’re saying.
“No?” his eyes meet your own, “I’m not throwing away good gym equipment”
You sigh, somehow expecting no less from him. Jungkook was a man of many skills, and he’d hounded you to try hobby after hobby with him— but nothing got him going like a good work out. If all other passion in life disappeared then he would still have working out as his escape.
You sigh, “I have somewhere to be later, so let’s hurry this up” a little white lie, but that never hurt anyone.
“You’re not going on another one of those shitty blind dates, are you?” he groans and you whine.
“I told you, I’m never going on any of those ever again”
“You better not” he unrolls his mat, and you follow.
“Or what?” you turn your nose up at him and Jungkook’s foot collides with your thigh.
“On your back, you brat.”
✯ ✯ ✯
“How much more” you flop against the mat, eyes closing.
“That was only the warm up” Jungkook hums, pushing himself up off the floor.
You hear him walk to the other side of the room, cupboard door creaking open as he rummages around for something.
You peek up at him through your lashes when he throws a towel over your back.
“Roll that up” he motions towards it, coming to sit beside you, “And up onto your back again”
Your eyes widen by a fraction when he gently takes the towel out of your hands, pushing your knees apart before he’s closing them; towel stuffed between your thighs.
Your gaze travels down the length of your body, thighs twitching as Jungkook’s fingers wrap around your ankles.
“All you have to do is raise your legs like this okay?” and he demonstrates, making sure to keep your legs straight as he lifts them to a ninety degree angle from your torso. “Leg raises should be easy, even for you” he hums.
“What’s that supposed to mean” you snap, ready to push yourself up, except Jungkook’s hands press down over your chest.
“Hey! No complaining”
You swallow thickly, aware of Jungkook’s eyes on you as you raise your legs on your own this time.
“Pretty good, remember to tense your core when you do it, okay?”
You nod, bottom lip caught between your teeth as you do as you’re told.
Your eyes squeeze shut, body hyper aware of each small movement the towel has right over your clit. Pussy throbbing inside your panties and you worry your slick had started to soak through your shorts.
Jungkook doesn’t seem to take notice of your growing predicament, hands hovering over your calf to make sure you’re raising your legs all the way. Though that’s the least of your worries as you feel each new wave of unadulterated pleasure pulse through your core.
“Not so bad huh?” he grins.
It’s a strange sensation, pure arousal ebbing up your body, every brush of your panties over your clit, weight of the towel over your slit slowly bringing you to the precipice of an orgasm.
“I don’t think—“ you start, cutting yourself off with an arm covering your face at a particularly intense wave of arousal. Your stomach tightening at the feeling.
“Just a few more, you’re doing great”
“Kook, I really don’t think—“ your hand clamps over your mouth as Jungkook’s fingers take hold of your legs, helping you raise them; and that’s all it takes to tip you over the edge. And you can’t help the surprised moan that drips off your lips.
Your knees bend, nudging against your tits as your hand falls over your sodden pussy, dull wave of your orgasm throbbing throughout your body.
Jungkook looks down at you, eyes wide as you simply lay there with your hands between your legs.
“Did you just piss yourself?” he asks, mouth falling open in awe.
“What the fuck?” you cry, “I just came you idiot”
Jungkook’s cheeks flush red, “Oh” he nods, “Oh. You had a— holy shit”
“Don’t look at me like that” your eyes glaze over with tears, heat prickling up your body in embarrassment, “I didn’t mean to, it just happened”
Your feet fall to the floor, towel falling from between your thighs as you let out a stuttered breath, body still buzzing with the after affects or your surprise orgasm.
“Jungkook?” you peek up at him through hooded eyes, heart pattering so hard in your chest you could feel it in your throat.
Jungkook’s eyes meet your own, “That was so fucking hot” he groans, “Looked so pretty”
You watch as his hand rubs over his shorts, his own arousal hard to hide as his head tips back in a way that extenuates his neck.
“Huh?” your eyes widen, willing yourself to not look at what his hands were doing.
“Should have known something like this would have turned you on”
“I wasn’t even turned on” you exasperate, “I clenched my core like you said and it just happened”
“Mhmm” and you can tell he’s unconvinced.
“Stop rubbing your dick, you horny piece of shit” you clamp a hand over your eyes, thighs clenching when he lets out a deep groan.
“Can’t help it” he lets out a sigh, “I’ve been dreaming of what you’d look like when you came, shame it wasn’t on my cock”
Your hand falls from your eyes, “Dreaming?”
“God, haven’t I made it obvious?” he asks, his own hands falling to his sides, though now you have a full view of his straining erection.
“Made what obvious?” you whisper.
“That I like you” he asks and you gawk at him.
“You, like me? I’ve been trying to hint that I like you” you point at him, mouth falling open in disbelief.
“Huh?” it’s Jungkook’s turn for furrowed brows, “I swear you didn’t like me”
“I could have sworn you didn’t like me”
Jungkook snorts, “When did I ever say that?”
“You’re unbelievable”
“Me? What about you?”
Your body lays flaccid, muscles loose; heart hammering in your ears as Jungkook leans back on his hands.
“How long?” you ask, not daring to look up at him.
“High school”
You push a palm into the socket of your eye, low groan rumbling up your throat, “I’ve liked you since, I don’t know, probably high school as well”
“Why didn’t you tell me?” he asks, voice soft and you can feel yourself tearing up— so many emotions plaguing your mind at once you don’t know how to feel.
Jungkook scoots closer to you, “I could say the same thing about you” you huff.
“Why’re you crying” he frowns, thumb gentle as it brushes against your damp cheek.
“We wasted so many years. I seriously thought— you’ve had so many girlfriends”
“Because I thought you didn’t feel the same, I guess I thought my feelings would go away if I gave my heart to someone else. And then you started dating around too and I really thought I’d never have a chance”
“Me too” you sigh, nose scrunching up in distaste for all your failed relationships.
“Guess it didn’t work out for either of us huh?” he hums and you nod.
“I think we’re both stupid” you murmur.
And Jungkook nods, “I agree”
“What do we do now?” you push yourself up onto your elbows, frown on your face.
“Can I kiss you?” Jungkook’s head hovers over your own, the sun meeting the moon at the same point in the sky— your eclipse. The rest of your world suddenly shrouded in darkness, all you can see, think, smell, everything just Jungkook.
You nod, eyes flitting across his face as his arms cage your head. You can see his biceps flexing in your peripherals, thick muscle straining under the weight of his torso.
Jungkook’s lips hover over your own, a breaths width away from touching. You tilt your head up, pillowy lips cushioning your own and that’s when everything falls into place.
There’s nothing desperate about the kiss, ever so gentle and slow, the two of you aware that lost time can be made up in the future as you simply bask in this moment; your worlds aligning, tilting on the same axis, everything just perfect and right, and your hearts beating in sync, and breathing stuttered as you both pull away with hesitance.
Your hands cup Jungkook’s cheeks, eyes searching his own for anything, just something to tell you this wasn’t all a dream— that he really did like you back.
“You’re so pretty, you know?” he whispers, his lips pressing a featherlight kiss to the corner of your lips.
“No” you smile, giggle bubbling up your throat and Jungkook can’t help but grin down at you.
“I’ll tell you every day, all the time. You’ll get sick of me”
“I could never get sick of you, Jungkook” you push yourself up onto your elbows, noses bumping.
He tilts his head, kiss firm, and you moan as his tongue licks at the seam of your lips, a silent plea for access.
You oblige, arms slung over his shoulders as you bring his body closer to your own, heat radiating off the two of you in thick waves.
“You taste so good” he groans, hands wandering down your body, teasing as they pull up the hem of your hoodie, “Want this off”
Your fingers tug at the offending material, dragging it up your body, “Hang on” you pull away from the kiss, and Jungkook feels his cock twitch at the sight of you. Red swollen lips, a sheen of his saliva coating them.
You pull your hoodie over your head, throwing it somewhere, a problem for later. Thighs clenching as Jungkook stares down at you— eyes wandering.
“And this” his fingers skim over the edge of your sports bra, dancing over your skin, mapping you out of every little spot he wants to kiss.
You hesitate.
“We don’t have to do this if you’re uncomfortable” Jungkook’s smile is gentle, retracting his hands and you want to whine at the loss of contact.
“I want to” you tell him, hoping the shake in your voice didn’t sound too unconvincing. The incessant throbbing between your legs wouldn’t go away unless Jungkook helped you out and your patience was slowly wearing thin.
“But?” he urges.
“I’m nervous” you admit and he smiles; reassuring.
“How can I help?”
You squirm under his gaze, fizzling embarrassment painting your cheeks red, “Can we both—“ you cut yourself off with a whine.
“Come on, gotta use your words, my love”
“Can we both get naked” you splutter, “At the same time?”
Jungkook’s head falls back, fully belly laugh wracking through his body, “Of course”
You tug your shorts off, Jungkook following you; a pile of both your clothes laying forgotten by your head. You’re too distracted tugging your sports bra off to see Jungkook’s length slap against his stomach. Tip of his cock an angry red, his fingers barely touching his shaft as he closes them around the length.
“Oh” he croons, “How pretty. Can I touch you?”
You nod, falling onto your back.
Jungkook’s careful as he touches you, thumbs brushing over your hardened nipples, testing the waters as he tugs at them, eliciting a breathy moan from you.
“Feels good?” his voice low, and you nod; hips involuntarily bucking upwards when you finally cast a glance at his length. Eyes widening a little in awe.
His fingers dig into your flesh, and he bends down, lips closing around one of your nipples. Your back arches, mouth falling open in a silent moan as his teeth nip at the sensitive skin; tugging in a way that sends warm pleasure straight to your core.
He kisses over your chest, lips worshipping your skin, fingers skimming over the underside of your boob.
Each gentle press of his lips are searing as he works down your body. And your breath hitches as his hovers over your pussy, folds glistening with your arousal.
“Oh baby” he groans, and your thighs twitch as his warm breath fans over your core.
Your fingers tangle into his hair, impatient as they tug him closer to where you need him; an embarrassed whine falling past your lips when he kisses over you clit, once, then twice.
“Jungkook” you squeak, legs tensing when he finally wraps his lips around it, tongue flicking at your clit meanly.
He simply hums, vibrations sending a new wave of pleasure straight through your body, another gush of wetness dribbling from your hole. Jungkook wastes no time, fingers scooping up your leaking arousal before he’s pushing them into you.
“Oh” your chest stutters a breath as he pulls his fingers out of you, tongue licking a broad stripe over your cunt before his thumb brushes over your clit.
“You like that?” he asks, though the question was rhetorical as he repeats the motion. Tongue teasing over your hole before he’s lapping up your slick; sucking at your folds, squelching lewd accompanied by each hearty moan.
Your thighs start to shake, clamping around Jungkook’s head though that barely deters him, as he pushes your legs open by your knees.
“Stop. Kook— please” you whimper, “wanna cum around your cock”
That catches his attention, and with one final kiss to your clit he’s pushing himself onto his elbows.
Jungkook looks like the epitome of sin, slick stained chin and swollen red lips, unashamed as he licks your arousal off his face, humming in satisfaction as your chest stutters out a breath.
“Lemme get a condom” he murmurs, lips pressing another kiss over your knee before he’s pushing himself to stand. Your eyes follow his body, heavy cock bobbing against his stomach with every step he takes.
“Hopefully they’re not expired” he calls from the other room, and you giggle at that, “We’re good” he flashes you a grin as he drops back between your legs; foil wrapper held between two fingers.
You watch his fingers run down his length, thumb brushing over his slit and you feel slick dribble out of your hole as a bead of pre-cum coats the head of his cock shiny.
“Please” your head tips back, hands impatient as they tug at your nipples; Jungkook completely entranced by the sight. “Hurry, hurry” you nudge his thigh with your foot, and albeit reluctant, he tears his eyes away from your tits.
He rips the condom open with his teeth, a cheesy attempt at seducing you, and you weren’t about to tell him all he had to do was breathe and you panties would dampen.
He rolls the rubber down his length, fingers wrapping around his cock as he tugs a few times. You choose that moment to flip yourself over, hips raised as your chest lays flat against the floor and Jungkook moans.
“My pretty baby” he croons, hands roaming your ass before he’s pulling your cheeks apart; eyes fixed on your clenching cunt. Ever so enticing, silently begging to be filled and fucked until you can’t think or walk; a perfect excuse for Jungkook to pamper you a little.
You wiggle your hips, giggle muffled in the crook of your elbow has he parts your lips with his thumb, gently dipping into you hole before he’s pulling out.
“Please, Jungkook”
And that’s all it takes for him to line the head of his cock up with you entrance, tip nudging against your clit before he’s pushing into you; every inch stretching you apart deliciously.
“So good” you sigh, walls clenching around him and Jungkook can’t help the stutter of his hips, punching the air out of your lungs at the sudden intrusion.
“Sorry—“ his fingers dig into your hips, “Just feels so good, sucking me in”
You rock back onto his cock, breathy moan tumbling past your lips as your ass meets his pelvis; cock fully tucked into your pussy.
“Give me a moment” you shudder, body thrumming in anticipation.
Jungkook hums, hands wandering your body, fingers dancing over your skin. A surprised moan echoes throughout the room as his hands grab both your tits, squeezing them, fingers rubbing over both your nipples sending hot pleasure straight to your cunt.
He can feel you rhythmically clenching around him, walls sucking him in as you rock forward an inch before you’re sinking back down on his length.
“Okay” you nod, fingers holding onto the edge of the yoga mat.
“You sure?” he asks, pulling out to the tip, hips slow as he plunges back into you.
“Mhmm”
You feel Jungkook’s fingers dig into the meat of your hips, picking up the pace of his thrusts.
You can’t help each near pornographic moan that’s pushed out of you with each harsh slap of Jungkook’s hips meeting your ass, skin smacking wet as your slick coats your thighs.
“So good for me” his head tips back, arms hooking around your bent elbows.
You let out a squeak as he sits you up, and your walls constrict around his length as he pushes deeper inside of you, gush of wetness clinging to his thighs.
“So good” your head tips back onto his shoulder, knees helping you bounce up his length.
Your back arches when the head of cock hits your g-spot, ring of creamy slick gathering at the base of his cock each time you pull up to the tip.
“Look at that” Jungkook murmurs into your ear, one hand tangling into your hair as the other settles over your throat.
He tugs your head up, and you catch your reflection in the full length mirror; insides of your thighs coated in a sheen of your slick, Jungkook’s hips thrusting his cock up into you, both your bodies glistening with sweat.
The red hue of your cheeks flushes down your neck and chest, shade darkening with each wet squelch of your cunt as Jungkook helps you bounce in his lap.
He watches your tits bounce, both his hands wandering to grab them, pulling your back closer to chest as he pounds into you.
“I’m gonna cum” you hiccup, hands scrambling to hold onto his bicep as your other hand travels down your body, fingers gathering up your slick before you’re circling your clit.
You thighs start to shake, crescent moons indented into your skin as Jungkook’s grip on your chest tightens, your walls throbbing around his cock, drawing him closer to his orgasm.
“Yeah?” his hips stutter, “Come for me then, pretty. Let’s come together”
You moan, fingers unrelenting as you thrum at your clit in tight circles. Your orgasm wracks throughout your entire body when it hits, stomach tensing as your cum coats Jungkook cock, which twitches as he thrusts up into you.
He holds you down on his length, deep groan rumbling through his chest as he shoots his seed into the condom, your walls continuing to milk him of everything he’s got.
“Good girl” he soothes, hands falling to your hips as you fall forwards, cheek pressed against the mat as Jungkook pulls out, thrusting back into you gently.
“Thank you” you whimper, thighs tensing as he pulls himself out of your sodden pussy, folds glistening creamy white.
✯ ✯ ✯
Everything feels right. The two of you tucked into Jungkook’s bed after a shower, both your hands roaming one another’s bodies.
You’d clung to Jungkook’s back as he’d cooked you both dinner, work-out long forgotten as you’d both worked up an appetite. Muscles too sore, too achey, to even think of carrying on anything that isn’t wrapping up warm in each others’ arms.
It’s strange how so much, but nothing had changed. You still danced around each other with practiced ease, hands still feathery light, skimming over hips and backs, where legs are tangled under blankets, cold feet on warm skin.
There was something mellow in the air, a film of freedom, hearts on your sleeves for one another to see, where kisses felt softer, deeper in promise and love.
All the ‘I love yous’ holding the right weight, both understanding that the love you feel is the right kind of love.
He’d thought about it a lot, from the day you’d both confessed; messy, but a confession nonetheless. (And he had made sure to ask you to be his girlfriend in a more romantic setting than his spare room turned gym). That maybe the time growing up as just friends wasn’t wasted.
Failed relationships and sticky breakups simply teaching the two of you the right way to love.
Learning the give and take of relationships, what it truly meant to be in love with another person. Where you want nothing more than their happiness, a pure sort of adoration that consumes your entire being until they’re always on your mind. Small, seemingly insignificant parts of life reminding you of them. Trinkets in corner shops or the changes in season, certain smells, textures of clothing.
Learning about what you want for yourselves and how to take care of one another.
So he doesn’t regret all those years spent as just friends. Because maybe the two of you were too young, too eager, too scared about something as precious as true love. Growing up together, as just friends, might have brought the two of you closer than rushed first loves and petty arguments that you’d look back on and regret.
Red string. Stars. Fate. Destiny. Any of it. Jungkook doesn’t know what brought the two of you together, two souls intertwined until you both part ways when your lights flicker out. Though he thinks you’d reignite them wherever the two of you end up later on, new lives, new worlds. New everything, where he gets to learn about you all over again, explore your being, as you explore his, and you’re moulding into one another once more.
He wonders how long you’ve both been laying there, lips pulled up into lazy smiles, kiss swollen; little galaxies reflected in both your eyes.
Where every glistening star is a reason as to why you love each other. Your galaxies shining with a million different reasons, moonlight no longer veiling what lay beneath.
Because Jungkook thinks, if people were made of stardust before they were born. There’s no doubt in his mind, the two of you were made from the same star.
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6K notes · View notes
prettyboykatsuki · 13 days
Note
I can just imagine fujo neet reader practicing different sex position with rin to make sure she gets the proportions right.
✮ tags ; fem!reader, sexual tension, rin's pov, RIN IS KIND OF MEAN TO HER BUT HE WANTS HER SO BAD FDKJJS, reader is a fujoshi and bl mangaka, pre-relationship, they work together, part of a ficverse i haven't written yet Sorry, ONE JOKE ABOUT RIN WANTING TO OFF HIMSELF, SUPER SUGGESTIVE LOL 18+
✮ wc ; 3.5k (WHAT THE FUCK!!!!!!!)
✮ a/n ; i had to do this for my sanity. i promise i will write them a proper fic with them i promise.
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You never text Rin.
Not really. Not first at least. It's a new... friendship. Kind of. Sort of. Most of your communication thus far has been through meetings and random in-person chance encounters. Outside of that, Rin will call you since it's faster. If you do "text", it's mostly through twitter DM's.
There's a discord server your fans run, and you pop in there often enough. He's had the invitation extended but declined unilaterally, since he'd rather not see himself fucking Isagi anymore than he already has in his short, miserable career.
It surprised him this morning, seeing your message flash across the top of his screen. Asking, specifically, for him to come over and help you with something related to the new manga you were writing. He had it in his right mind to decline, but after learning it wasn't a doujin for him, he semi-reluctantly agreed.
Rin doesn't know when exactly your relationship to him grew this...comfortable. Inviting him over to your house, begging him for favors, not wincing every time he talks to you. Rin isn't an extrovert but compared to you he's a social butterfly. And your aversion to people in general, Rin thought, would prevent you from doing anything more than squeak at him forever just like you did when he met you.
(Though nothing in his life has been normal since your arrival in it. He's not sure why you would remain unchanged when he certainly hasn't.)
He doesn't know what to feel when you ask him for a favor, and he doesn't know what force of nature compels him to go. If it's morbid curiosity or annoyance or something else even worse.
It was compelling enough to take the train all the way out to Machida - an hour long trip from his own place. His manager hounded him to take you something, so he has a bag of ginseng energy drinks and snacks with him as a gift. He took the bus with his mask on, and then walked all the way to your building.
Your apartment is tucked somewhere classically suburban - attached at the far end of a residential street and behind concrete support beams for a highway just overhead. Cherry blossom trees and other shades of white flowers grow around it in thick patches, making the entrance hard to find. Rin would've had trouble if you didn’t give him details on exactly where to go.
It's an older building, stone walls worn and grass-stained from age. At the gate are groups of old people talking amongst each other as they sort through recycling and trash. All visor hats and sunspots, they fawn over Rin for a long while before he goes in and interrogates him with questions. None of them know him, which is relieving. It quickly graduates to them asking who he's there to visit, if he has a girlfriend or not.
All of them ooh and aah when he mentions your name, say something about being relieved she's found a man so handsome and that Rin should marry you because even though you're a little strange you're a good girl. Rin does not have the time nor energy to correct them - only nods and bows his head and leaves.
On the elevator ride up to your floor, he can't help but think repeatedly that this isn't the kind of place he'd expect you to live. He thought it'd be out in the middle of nowhere, maybe in a damp and broken building.
But this is a nice place with nice people, vibrant and colorful. Totally opposite from what he considers your personality.
Suitable or not, Rin manages to make it to your floor without a hitch.
He finds you, then, as he'd expect. Down a long hall, behind an unassuming white door. When you open it, you're a mess. Your hair completely unkempt, face greasy, a wild look in your eyes and complete surprise in your expression as if you didn't invite him over. You do, however, manage to invite him in without stuttering or stumbling over your words foolishly like you did the first time you spoke to him.
Another surprise is how... clean your living room is. It's lived in but he was expecting more mess in there. Your bedroom is in a similar state, undoubtedly messy but not terrible. Your NEET tendencies finally end up showing when you drag Rin into your office where you draw your manga.
It's not dirty but it's cluttered. There's a pull out sofa on one wall, with a blanket and pillow littered about and pages upon pages of paper sheets with scrapped panels about the floor. One wall has a bunch of post-its with several notes in both English and Japanese, and another has tacked up pieces of art. Both yours and other peoples. He chooses to ignore the ones of him and Isagi, The walls themselves are cream colored and uninteresting and the wood floors are slippery. At the far end of the room is a spread of desks, a PC set-up and a professional looking tablet among various art supplies in stacked boxes.
It's this room you bring Rin into without explaining yourself at all, mumbling and muttering as you give him a place to sit and go back to your work for fifteen silent minutes.
When you're finally finished doing whatever the fuck you were doing, you turn yourself back towards Rin. Bluelight glasses fall down the bridge of your nose as you swivel around in your chair - your sweatpants half pulled up your leg with the other pulled down. You're wearing fuzzy socks with Naruto characters on them.
You stare at him, pulling your glasses off and rubbing your eyes - dark circles under them.
"Uhm," Your voice is clipped and thick with exhaustion. "You came."
Rin deadpans. "You asked me to come."
"I thought you'd say no."
He did too. He doesn't respond back. You chew your lips, already anxious and Rin resists the urge to say something about it.
"Okay. Uhm. Please don't get mad," You start with and then explain, looking away. Your hands pull your sleeves over your palms. "So. Like. For my new series, I'm finally getting to the sex scene but I've never drawn characters with an intense height difference like this. And I need... new reference photos.... and uhm," You rub your feet together on your chair where you sit "Well our height differences and size is the exact one my characters have. So."
Rin stares at you. "So?"
"SoIwaswonderingifyou'dtakereferenceimagesforsexpositionswithme,"
Rin feels his jaw lock. "Slower."
You frown and look away, tucking your chin with embarrassment. "I was uhm, like, wondering if you'd take... take the uhm, sex position reference photos with me, please."
"What?"
You clasp your hands together, immediately prostrating yourself by throwing yourself down the ground. He flinches back, wondering if you're gonna hold onto his leg next.
"Please, please help me. You're the exact height of my seme and you uhm have similar builds and he's doing the most of the legwork. The poses are a little bit hard but I want them to look good or Minami-san will eat me and I'm scared of her, please help me."
"Who is Minami-san?"
You sniffle, on the verge of tears just thinking about it. "My editor. She used to be my fan. She's scary. Please, Rin-kun, please."
"What the hell did you do before?"
You frown at him, big wet puppy-dog eyes.
"It was hard. Sometimes I'd pose with my big stuffed animals and make up the proportions. Oh and usually watched porn and stuff. Sometimes I'd get lucky with stockphotos. But I don’t get the angle exactly right unless I have good references."
Rin wonders if anything you have ever said has processed in your mind before saying it. He doubts it for some reason.
"So," Rin pinches the bridge of his nose and shakes the image of you humping your stuffed animals out of his head. "You're asking me to.. pose with you?"
You nod and chew your lip. "Please, I promise I'd never ask you for this if I wasn't s-scared of Minami-san! Please?"
"I should make you pay me for this," He sneers. You flinch back and close your eyes.
"I'm sorry." You whine wetly, but then open your eyes again anyway. "Please help me."
Rin doesn't know why he helps you. Maybe you're just too pathetic for him to ignore. Maybe he's a masochist. Maybe inhaling the same air as Bachira last week turned him stupid.
He pinches the bridge of his nose.
"Fine."
__
If Rin didn't believe you before when you told him you make your own references, he'd definitely believe you after you take him to your bedroom.
Your bed is in the center of your room, instead of being pushed against a wall. Large stuffed animals laid in one corner. On both sides of the room, are makeshift digital camera stands and remote-controlled lighting among another remote for said cameras. There's about 4-6 angles from what you explained to Rin, and a few adjustable lights. It's an elaborate set-up and takes the kind of dedication Rin can only imagine a hardcore fujoshi freak like yourself thinking up.
All of this to mostly draw porn of him and his rival. He tries not to think about it too hard because he thinks it's going to give him an aneurysm. Rin sits at the edge of your bed as you adjust each of the cameras individually.
"What do you do if it's not on a bed?"
You flinch like you aren't expecting him to talk. "Uhm. I either simulate as best I can o-or move my things and bed around. It's why I moved my desk to my office."
Rin stares at you. "You take it seriously."
You nod meekly. "Producing high-quality doujin is what made me money, so I have to work hard. Being poor is tough."
If Rin didn't find you so unbearable he might find that awe-inspiring in his own fucked up way.
"Okay. Everything is set-up. Now for the poses," You say, suddenly sparking back to life. Rin sits and watches. "They're having sex on a public beach so the bed and the way the seme sort of sinks into the sand will be good... I think the bridge one is the one we'll do first."
"The bridge?"
You nod, talking in short sentences. But Rin can tell this is where you're comfortable, doing things for this... hobby. Your usual constant embarrassment and shame seem to disappear when it comes to it. It's fascinating like a car crash. "Uhm. You have to stand on your knees and then, I'll lay on my back and arch my back up to meet your... y'know. It'll emphasize the height difference."
Rin stares at you agape. You take the remote control for your cameras in your hands and look at him expectantly.
Rin doesn't know whats wrong with him. Why the hell did he agree to this?
"Do you want me to take my jacket off?"
You nod, surprised. He shrugs the thing off of his shoulders and tosses it onto the floor.
Rin, per your instruction, gets into the position in the middle of the bed. He stands on his knees waiting for you. You join him a minute after, squinting at your phone screen beforehand. He isn't sure what he's expecting as a result of your ask, but he sure is shocked when he finds you placing your feet flat on the bed next to his knees and pushing yourself up for your crotch to meet his.
He knows that’s what you said but your shamelessness proves to be… shocking.
He tries not to let it show. His jaw ticks. His face feels warm but his expression remains neutral all the same. You shift and adjust and don't seem concerned at all - like it doesn't occur to you that this is in any way socially unacceptable. Or it's unfathomable Rin would take advantage of this. That this is weird, or could be interpreted in less than innocent ways. Rin knows you're so out of touch that it probably isn't. That this is, to you, just considered a favor which is partially why he even agrees.
But you're mid-brushing up against his bulge. The angle of your back forms a triangle, your arms laid flat at your sides as you squirm and push. And your expression shifts, deep in thought.
"Uhm, like, would you mind p-putting your hands on my hips? Kind of squeezing tight like it's," You flush this time, but Rin harbors doubt it's about him. "Like it feels good I guess? Like hard, and stuff so you can see the indent."
He's so astonished, he does it on autopilot. Neutral and even. He lets his hands grab your hips and holds tight just as you ask. Your long, loose sweatshirt falls down revealing the soft skin of your tummy. He can see the tops of your underwear, the thin cotton kind that come in 6-packs with a single bow in the middle in a grey color.
You don't seem to care about it. Rin shouldn't either, but his body does seem to care. His brain does. Something is happening in his gut. Anger maybe. Some cheap, frustrated desire to make fun of you.
Instead the words he's been wanting to ask since you proposed this tumble out of his mouth. He stares at you.
"Is this the first time someone's done this with you?"
You jump with a start, but remain in position. You take the pictures first, six clicks in a row before answering.
"H-huh? Why-why are you asking that?"
He doesn't know. Really. And he knows how it sounds. Rin doesn't say anything and you fold under the immense pressure of his gaze.
"S-stop staring," You say, and take a few more pictures, lowering your back just a little but still staying up right. "And no. No one tall enough or with the right physique."
There is another gnawing question, another burning curiosity. He makes his voice as even and unaffected and apathetic as he can. As mean as possible.
"Have you ever even had sex?"
Your eyes blow wide, but you seem to fall for the persona of apathy, curious boredom and cruelty. Worse, you seem a little used to it. You squirm this time and Rin holds you firmly in place. Your voice is small.
"Uhm, like, once I guess. I-it was with a guy, I didn't really date him but he seemed interested in me and I didn't think I'd ever have the opportunity again s-so I did it and I didn't uhm, it wasn't very good or anything." You reply, and he can feel your toes curl in your socks next to him and his brain feels like it'll melt from out of his ears. "Sorry, I don't-don't think you care about that, just uhm, felt like I should explain."
"Yeah," Rin feels dizzy. "Do you need another pose?"
You blink and then nod. "Yeah! Another one kind of like this, but with the legs like uhm, on your chest and my feet closer to your head. With you leaned back a little. Does that make sense? The butterfly position, I think."
Rin swallows something at the back of throat.
He nods, pulling you into position so easily he can heard you gasp. Your legs straighten against his clothed chest, and your sweatshirt falls far enough to let him see your bra. A fabric sports kind, a little worn - just the logo visible. He doesn't say anything about it, your feet resting near his neck. You make a little soft noise.
"This feels a little difficult to be in. Poor uke. Sorry if this one is kind of weird, but can you put your hands, I dunno, on my ass, I guess? I know that's probably too much but I think it'll be a good detail, so please? I'll pay you"
Rin stares at you, teeth gritting so hard he feels the back of his skull throb. "Fine."
Rin, per your request, puts his hands on your ass. It's easy enough, and he doesn't hold too tight. But it's too intimate, too stupidly fucking intimate, and he can feel you. You're hardly paying attention, caught up in your own head with whatever else. Rin is paying too much attention. Like how your sweatpants aren't thick enough to cover the outline of your frumpy cotton panties and how your soft all over. He's going to kill someone. Maybe himself.
Six more clicks and a little noise of satisfaction.
"Okay!!! I think these will turn out so great, and I can use them later too. Just one more. I have a lot of refs for this position, but uhm - I want to see if I can get the proportions correct, so if you'd please lay down," You tell him with such genuine excitement he can't find it in himself to say anything horribly cruel. "I'll be doing most of the work this time. I just-just need to see how uke will compare..."
You mutter something to yourself as Rin lets you down and lays himself down on your bed. You sit next to him for a long while, squinting at your phone. Rin stares at you as you. Wonders if he's gone completely insane, and tries to ignore the doom of the impending hard-on cozying itself in his pants.
Unceremoniously, you find yourself perching over Rin's lap. Not bothering to give him any pretense, it's the one thing about today that's really getting him.
"Oh, I need my hands for this," You give him the remote and stare down at him wide-eyed, over his lap. This has to be hell. "Could you take the photos this time?"
He closes his eyes and counts to ten and wonders if a concussion has made him insane. "Hm."
You brighten and Rin feels his chest go tight. "Thanks!"
Rin just nods, his mouth drying as you start to move and pose. A picture with your hands next to his head, and anothe r where you're sat up - your hands at your sides. Rin obediently takes pictures when you ask, his entire body tensing every single time you move.
"Okay, last one," You say. This time, you put your hands on his chest. Just the one. You must have something specific in your head that you're wanting to recreate. You bend down close, looking down at him as you do - your other hand clenched.
Rin looks up at you. He should not be thinking about you in any way. He's looking at the way your lips curve and plump and at your bare skin and your dark circles and your stupid licensed anime hoodie. He just gapes at you in confusion and mystique. He's around so many weirdos. It's not like there's anything special about you. You’re just another freak who makes porn of him. Plenty of people do that.
A loser and an idiot with no sense of self-preservation. There's nothing special about this, but Rin hasn’t been able to convince himself of that.
You stare down at him.
"Take a picture?"
Rin looks at you. Studies your expression. You seem like you're thinking. It's the only oppurtunity he has to pry.
"Did you want to ask something?" He says first. “You’re not hard to read.”
You startle, then nod. Your hand is on his chest. It's warm, and smaller than his.
"Oh, I-I guess I was wondering about what you asked me earlier. And uhm, like, I don't know. If you ever did anything. Your relationships aren't in the media and fans speculate but," You fall flat on your words. "I guess I was just curious."
Rin hates this question. It's why he never answers it. Why he hates being called a hearthrob, always too shallow and too personal for his taste.
"Nothing long term or serious. It was most for physical relief." Rin says, almost on autopilot. “Not that’d you know what that’s like.”
Your eyes widen. Rin feels his hands twitch, watching your expression finally grown conscious of him. Lust spreads through you like honey and Rin can see it in how you look. You squirm in his lap. He's not usually so aggressive, not usually one to care about sex in any important way. Not one to brag about something so unbelievably inane and trivial.
But it's bothering him, just how much he's fighting the urge to pin you down and fuck you. You of all people. It's not like him. Rough sex is whatever, but it's bothering him how little any of it seems to register in your head anymore like it once did. You could barely breathe the first time you met.
He doesn't know why he cares that you don’t anymore. He doesn’t give a shit about anything related to you
But the thought nothing seems to bother you anymore bothers him.
"Oh... I see. That's uhm, interesting. I b-bet you have a lot more experience than me. Maybe it'd be a good thing to keep you around for that kind of refernce too," You joke.
Rin lets his hand slip up to your hips without asking, not bothering to hide it anymore. His head feels with nothing but stupid useless thoughts. Thoughts of fucking you in your old, worn clothes and stained shirts and comfortable cotton underwear. Thoughts of your hands clutching at his shoulder all weepy with desire and need and stupidity - your big wide eyes bleary and sensitive. It's cruel how relentlessly he thinks about taking advantage of all your differences. Of how unathletic and awkward and unused to everything you are.
It's horrible just how much he's staving off his own arousal about it. Maybe you're strange habits are infecting him, making him strange too strange. All Rin can think about uselessly is how easily he could put you in your place. Fix you in some strange way. You’d be his to fix and you’d cry and weep and want to run away. Rin wouldn’t let you, keep you pinned and caged like an animal.
His throat feels tight. What is fucking wrong with him today?
Is he that pent up? He stares at you, and gets some passing feeling that there is more to it than that. He closes his eyes.
"Whatever," He says, letting go. You don't seem to notice it again, how thick his voice is getting "Are you almost done?"
You nod and smile. "Yes. Thank you."
Rin feels his heart tug and seethes. “You're welcome."
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wait wait wait guys have you ever thought about how the Mighty Nein are everything they shouldn’t be upon first glance
no no guys guys listen to me they’re all the antithesis of what they’re meant to be and that’s why they’re such amazing and heartfelt characters
like, Caleb is a wizard who’s afraid of his own fire magic. his own power causes him to falter in battle. his strongest spells are his most dangerous to himself. wizards are supposed to be prideful of their magic, but Caleb’s is the reason he hates himself
Beau is a monk who never wanted to be. her job is one that people normally associate with being calm and collected and Beau was a wild rebellious kid who got dragged into this line of work against her will. she never wanted to be this!! but now she is and she’s gotta deal with it!!
Fjord is a warlock who never wanted power from his pact, which is why you’d think a warlock would make their pact at all. but no. Fjord made his pact because he wanted to live, not because he wanted power. he was a scared orphan who hated his tusks, not a buff, muscled, angry half-orc like people assumed
Nott is NOT, that’s the whole crux of her narrative! she wasn’t pretty, like a halfling girl was supposed to be. she wasn’t a goblin, she was just transformed into one. and not only that, but despite being a three-foot-tall alcoholic kleptomaniac, she’s the mom of the group!
Jester is a Cleric whose god isn’t actually a god and who would much rather bash bad guys over the head with her lollipop than have to stop and heal her friends!! she’s a bubbly, optimistic ray-of-sunshine, but you know when she says she’s gonna change the world with friendship she means it as a threat
Mollymauk is an amnesiac, but he doesn’t want to remember who he was. if you ask him, that wasn’t him! he might be a flirtatious hedonistic carnie, but he’s also single-mindedly devoted to making the world a better and more loved place than it was when he found it. he’s a liar, but he means well. he’s an arrogant fool, yes, but he’s right! he did it! he left it better!
Caduceus seems like he’d be creepy and grim from growing up in a graveyard, but he’s actually the most chill out of the entire Nein by far. he’s calm, he’s sweet, and he’s comforting, more than anything else. you’d think he’d be amazed by seeing the outside world for the first time, but he spends the whole time knowing that one day he’ll return home, that he wasn’t supposed to be the one to leave
Yasha is a barbarian with skeletal wings and a dramatic, monochromatic look, but she’s a complete sweetheart. she’s Molly’s best friend, she was a carnival bouncer, she’s a lesbian disaster who collects pressed flowers in a book out of love for the wife she lost. those black wings were actually hiding soft white feathers
Essek was born straight into the den of politics, he was a spymaster, he literally started a war for his own gain, and yet. he’s sounds irredeemable on paper, but. he’s not!! sure, the Nein kind of have to drag his alignment kicking and screaming into neutral, but they manage it. Essek learns and grows and he overcomes his nature. he becomes good, against all odds
guys guys guys don’t you see it!! look at them!!they’re such compelling characters!! they’re everything they’re not supposed to be!! dude y’all how didn’t I realize this earlier!! they subvert their narratives in the most interesting ways ever and I justhshsbhshshsjnsmshsnhsfn!!
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s6ngbird · 3 months
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only you — felix catton ᯓ★
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⊹₊⋆ warnings — nsfw, p in the v, pretty much no plot, unprotected sex, fingering (f. recieving), overstimulation, lmk if i missed anything
⊹₊⋆ pairing — felix catton x fem!reader
⊹₊⋆ a/n — sorry for not posting for so long! exams were kicking my ass but im back so i will be wrapping up flowers from beneath soon
masterlist | bc: @cafekitsune
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summers at saltburn were always delightful and there never seemed to be a break from the drama
especially this year, as felix invited his new friend, oliver over for the summer
you heavily disliked him, believing that he thought too much of himself and believed he could have felix wrapped around his finger
this was not the case though, as you were the one who had felix wrapped around their finger, practically convincing him to do whatever you desired
you and felix had been friends for a few years, but felix never followed the rules of friendship and liked to make out or fuck you whenever he pleased
it did bother you sometimes, since he would be so chill with fucking all these girls that it made you feel like you were just another doll in his ever-growing collection of people who were obsessed with him
you weren't obsessed with felix, but you craved his attention and validation, wanting his praise whenever you could get it
venetia noticed this first, laughing and teasing you about it but then it wasn't so funny anymore when she found out felix and you liked to fuck
but you couldn't think about fucking felix now, oliver had just arrived a few days prior and he was already taking up all of felix's time and energy 
you constantly got bad vibes from oliver, but felix never seemed to notice, causing you to confide in venetia and farleigh 
venetia was a bit hesitant but farleigh agreed with you, calling oliver a creep and that he probably wanted to fuck felix himself
this left you unhappy, already upset from the attention being dragged away from you, but especially now that felix barely batted an eye in your direction
all of this was finally resolved though, during one of felix's many parties
you were engaging in a mindless conversation with some random guy, who was obviously flirting with you but you pretended to be oblivious to it
you felt a weight on your shoulders, looking up to see felix draped over you, holding his cigarette and yelling at farleigh 
the guy who was previously talking with you gave felix an annoyed glare but left as soon as felix's attention returned to you
felix looked at him confused but shrugged it off and laughed, sitting down on the couch and pulling you on him
felix started placing sloppy kisses on your neck, uncoordinated and whiskey filled kisses
“felix you are so fucking drunk” you say, holding your cup away from him as he tried to grab it, but since his arms were freakishly large, he grabbed it with ease, holding the cup to your lips and pouring it down your throat until it was all done
“there all done! now i can take you upstairs” felix said, getting up and grabbing your hand to try and drag you with him
“felix no” you replied, exhausted and still upset that he had barely paid attention to you all week
he pouted and shrugged, muttering that it wouldn't be a problem, leaving you confused until he grabbed you and threw you over his shoulder like you weighed nothing 
you decided against fighting him, being glad that he finally was paying some attention to you and allowed him to carry you upstairs to his room
he placed you on his bed, smiling and stripping himself of his clothes besides his boxers, climbing over you and kissing you 
it felt good to finally have felix's attention after the week, getting to feel his lips on yours, and his tongue exploring your mouth certainly was not unwelcome 
you allowed him to unzip your dress, helping him slip it off your body as you two continued to kiss one another like starving animals
“whyd'd ya ignore me all week?” felix said between kisses, starting to move his lips down to your throat to suck hard as you moaned
“you were ignoring me!” you yelped as felix smacked your thigh and sucked on your breast hard to silence you
“i was not, i kept trying to get your attention but you only wanted to pay attention to venetia and farleigh” he said angrily, his sweet facade melting away as he pulled down your panties, ripping them off of you to reveal your soaking cunt
he grinned at the sight, not hesitating to dive between your legs and lick up all your arousal 
you moaned as his tongue nudged inside your hole, going fully in and then backing out, only to slam itself back inside
you tried to grip his hair for support as you continued to moan but felix slapped your hands away, looking up at you with a warning look
eventually he switched his tongue for his fingers, continuing a brutal pace as you took your bud in his mouth, sucking hard when you least expected it, bring you to your first orgasm of the night
he continued to pump his fingers into you, slapping your ass or thigh every time you tried to push him away from your pussy
“i'm not stopping until i'm satisfied with you, after all that torture you put me through this week, it's only fair” he said hoarsely after you had came at least three more times, everytime complaining about how overstimulated you were
he got off of you and you silently pleaded with whatever that was watching over the two of you that he would be done and just cuddle with you
unfortunately no one seemed to answer your prayer since he got back on you, stripped of his boxers and lining up his hard cock with your hole, the precum spilling as he aligned himself 
he slid into you with little resistance, sighing as his cock found home in your warm cunt
he stayed there for a little while, savoring the feeling while you continued to whine and push at his shoulders
he finally started to move, setting a rough pace as you moaned, grabbing his shoulders as you cried
“aw baby don't cry, i promise after this we'll be done” he said, kissing your tears and silencing your whimpers with kisses
you felt so overwhelmed, crying from the feeling of being overstimulated but also moaning from the pleasure coming from felix's cock
“you ok love?” felix says after a while, kissing you once more after you had doing nothing but moaning and crying but suddenly stopped
you nodded, tightening around his cock as you felt your fourth or fifth orgasm approaching
“atta girl, come for me” he said, his hot breath right in your ear and that's all it took for you to come undone on him, coming hard and gripping onto his shoulders like he would disappear 
he moaned at the feeling, kissing your neck and letting out praises between his moans
“gonna come in you, gonna make you mine” he said, thrusting once more and coming inside of you, his cum coating your walls
he panted, staying inside of you for a little longer before pulling out and stuffing his cum back inside of you, eliciting a squeal as you were still overstimulated 
“sorry baby, can't help but do it, you're mine now” he said with a laugh, grinning at your shocked expression
“no more girls? or guys? not even oliver?” you said, confused by his words due to his playboy nature
“no one, not even oliver” he said, holding you close to him and kissing your head
“only you love”
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botanicalsword · 3 months
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Indicators for “it’s impossible to ignore you ♡ ” • Astro placements
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Harmonious aspect between Sun and Jupiter
Sun conjunct Jupiter + Jupiter in Sagittarius/ Pisces / Cancer
Chart Ruler in 10H + Harmonious aspect with personal planet
Personal planets in 2H / 4H / 10H
Venus in Libra, Asc in Libra w/o challenging aspects
Venus in Leo w/o challenging aspects
Harmonious aspect between Venus and Jupiter
Sun/ Moon / Venus / Jupiter in 11H + Harmonious aspect
11H Ruler in 1H / 4H/ 7H / 10H
11H ruled by a domiciled planet
Chart ruler in 11H / 2H
5H ruler in 11H
Harmonious aspect between Venus and Jupiter
Harmonious aspect between 2H and 5H and 11H (rulers / planets)
✧✧✧✧
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Harmonious aspect between Sun and Jupiter - wisdom and compassion
They have a captivating aura that attracts people and ensures their safety. They remain calm, never losing their composure. Their wisdom and kindness secure respect and support from everyone, regardless of the location or situation.
they tend to handle difficulties actively. When faced with difficulties or troublesome situations, those with a positive outlook tend to actively work to find solutions. They don't face major issues often, but smaller problems help them improve.
Easy success can dampen motivation, while challenges fuel drive. Even conflicts can be beneficial. Handling minor frustrations early fosters resilience. A blend of support and issues prevents complacency and maintains goal pursuit.
Sun conjunct Jupiter + Jupiter in Sagittarius/ Pisces / Cancer - they are defined by their cheerful outlook on life. With a harmonious astrological aspect boosting their mood, they tend to see the positive side in any situation. People enjoy their energy and smile easily in their presence. Their can-do attitude also helps opportunities come their way. Their natural luck maximizes when paired with practical wisdom about ups and downs.
Chart Ruler in 10H + Harmonious aspect with personal planet - They are strong, can handle high pressures and challenges, and stay resilient in adversity.
Personal planets in 2H / 4H / 10H - Coming from a wealthy family background, receiving strong support from their loving family circle.
Growing up with financial security provides a solid foundation for success. Their chill, can-do attitude lets their skills and talents to thrive in the work sphere. Recognized for contributions, opportunities come readily - good stuff just seems to find them.
With a little help and faith from the family, they keep their confidence sky high. No sweat, they can handle any bumps in the road.
Venus in Libra, Asc in Libra w/o challenging aspects - elegance and nobility. their gentle temperament makes people feel very comfortable and intimate.
Venus in Leo w/o challenging aspects -When everyone is watching, they stand amidst a vibrant light show, feeling incredibly classy. It's as if they have a unique filter making them look even better. The show is extraordinary, and all eyes are on them. The audience may express approval, jealousy, or admiration, but they accept it all. Because this is their stage, and they are the star of the show.
Harmonious aspect between Venus and Jupiter - Their financial success and enjoyable experiences are like eye-catching flowers. They display their wealth and easily gather attention. It's not just about getting rich, but also about having an impact. They're charmers, kind of like how flowers pull in bees. Living like this, they stand out from the crowd, just like a blooming flower in a field of grass.
Sun/ Moon / Venus / Jupiter in 11H + Harmonious aspect
11H Ruler in 1H / 4H/ 7H / 10H
11H ruled by a domiciled planet
Chart ruler in 11H / 2H
5H ruler in 11H
The 11th house is closely about forming friendships and spending time with your community. It primarily represents popularity and online traffic, both of which are crucial factors. As a social media influencer possess strong likability, their content will attract a larger audience, and they'll attract more views, leading to more clicks. Traffic is also a significant indicator of success in the realm of social media. All of this bodes well for them seeking exposure on their journey as social media creators.
Harmonious aspect between Venus and Jupiter - Venus, as a symbol of aesthetics, grants us a unique perception and appreciation of beauty, enabling us to seek and create elements of beauty in our daily lives.
Jupiter, as a symbol of opportunities and expansion, provides us with the ability to seize opportunities and amplify our influence in the digital age. These abilities are not limited to the physical world; they extend into the digital realm, allowing us to share our creations and ideas with a wider audience through the power of the internet.
Harmonious aspect between 2H and 5H and 11H (rulers / planets) - There will be a more direct relationship between wealth, traffic, and creativity. This means that wealth not only depends on our efforts but also on our ability to create compelling content and generate a significant amount of traffic. The value of such content will be more prominently recognized, and their wealth will more accurately reflect their creative abilities.
The more traffic and creativity they generate, the more wealth they will accumulate. The key is to invest effort in creating exceptional content that attracts a lot of viewers. The value of their content will be recognized appropriately, and the income they earn will accurately reflect their talent.
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icanseethefuture333 · 2 months
Text
PAC: How you will blossom in life & as an individual 🌺
"A flower that blooms in adversity, is the most rare and beautiful of all..." - Mulan
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Pile 1:
Shufflemancy -
Moonlight Sunrise by Twice
Spring Is Coming With A Strawberry In The Mouth by Caroline Polachek
Fashion by Kamaiyah
Success, Patience, Acceptance, Abundance, Knight of Cups, The Hierophant, Four of Wands, & The World
Bottom of my tarot deck was the world and bottom of my oracle deck was abundance. So it seems that prosperity is right around the corner for you, pile 1! You are going to be entering a period of abundance and the universe will provide clarity and wisdom for you for this spring. I heard "The world is yours", so I feel that through life experiences, you will blossom and grow as a person. You are going to come in contact with a divine counterpart and it will feel almost too good to be true. I almost wrote "gold" so something about them shines the light in you. I also interpret this as embracing all aspects of love, such as allowing yourself to receive it (either from yourself or from others) as well as giving love. People could tell you that you're glowing more and overall your essence and appearance will become very radiant. It is possible that the person, or even people, that you will meet are going to highlight your best attributes. You will be able to be yourself around others and your true self will be greatly admired. I also see that your beauty and personal style will be very eye catching. You could learn to dress for your body type or you will try a new makeup look that enhance your features. Your individuality could be valued and admired by others, the glimmer in your eyes as you talk about your hopes, dreams, goals, or even what makes you happy would really be noticeable. For some of you, you could fall in love, while for others, you will make a friend, perhaps its both. Everything you ever waited and wanted for in life is going to happen to you. In life, you were someone who was always patient and observant of others, but the desires you seek is now time for you to have a turn to experience. You are learning to hoist your sails and steer the ship, instead of going against the water's current. You will be proud of how far you've come and will be able to celebrate your accomplishments soon! You could also be invited to parties or social events where your will get to make connections with others. Fixed energy (Leo, Aquarius, Scorpio, especially Taurus) is prominent in this pile, so it is likely you are going to attract opportunities for money as well that could provide you with a sense of confidence, mental clarity, emotional security, and financial stability. The message for you pile 1, is that "you deserve it". You are deserving love, happiness, and abundance. Be sure not to block your blessings by focusing on your insecurities, accept what you cannot change. Find the beauty in the present and what surrounds you.
Pile 2:
Shufflemancy -
LA DI DA by EVERGLOW
Mango Butter by Durand Bernarr
Link Up by Tinashe
Surrender, Friendship, Trust, Change, Seven of Cups, The High Priestess, The Emperor, & Knight of Pentacles
Forming a bond with others and allowing others to help you on your journey, pile 2, will you help blossom as an individual. You are a confident individual who knows their worth and you have a good head on your shoulders, but there is this aspect of constantly needing to be independent that is stunting your growth. Hyper-independence will not get you anywhere in life, it will only add to your stress and frustration. While you are someone who is successful in your endeavors, you do not allow yourself to trust in others. You could have possibly been raised with the mindset of "hustle culture" or could go by the saying I've been "grindin' all my life". Most people who reached to the top didn't do it all by themself. Whenever someone accepts an award, there are people that they have to thank for their contribution to their work. Whether that was a album, a film, a book, etc. It takes a team effort to get the end result. So you can be the star of the movie, you can be the main character, but watching a film that involves only one person doesn't really make sense. Unless this is the movie "Castaway", then you are going to need to have people in your life to help elevate you as a person. You have to be willing to learn the lessons necessary for your character development. Trust others could be something that is difficult for you but you know that you are smart, pile 2. If someone does not seem like a good apple, you are not obligated by any means to stay friends with them. The universe asks you to surrender and let go of the need to control everything, allow situations to unfold unnaturally. As much as we want life to be peaceful and never have to deal with negativity. It's not realistic, life is balanced, it has its ups and downs - good and bad. You need a friend who will help relieve that stress you are feeling in the moment. Learn to relax and unwind, you don't need to be strong all the time. You will blossom in life and as a person when you embrace having fun, letting your hair down, and being carefree.
Pile 3:
Shufflemancy -
Rocky by SAAY
Let Out The Beast by EXO
You Don't Understand by Gramatik
Freedom, Loneliness, Death, Failure, Five of Wands, Ace of Pentacles, Three of Cups, & Ace of Swords
Oh boy, are you in your angst era, pile 3? You could feel misunderstood and attacked by others. Growing up, it is possible that others would put you down and make you feel less about yourself. A select few of you have experienced bullying, some of you are dealing with unreasonable classmates or coworkers, while for others, your parents or family members were the first bullies you had. Whatever the case may be - you do not need to fight with these people anymore. You are free to walk away from at any given moment. I know that sounds easier said done but it is time for you stop letting people walk over you. This also may sound harsh but you have to get over this victim mindset as well. You are awesome person, pile 3, but holding onto grudges and toxic situations is not going to help you. You will blossom as a individual when you just stop giving a fuck about what these people have said or done to you. Do what you have to do to release the pent up emotions and say your piece then move on. Some of you, need to let someone have it. As in cuss them out for their mistreatment and put that asshole in their place. You don't have to let people get the best of you but you do need to set boundaries with people and know when to say "enough is enough". You are too nice to others and being cool, calm, and collected is not going to fix your problems. I see you are going to feel so relieved after you do this and a weight will be lifted off of your shoulders once you finally confront these issues. I also see that your feelings of loneliness and not being able to "fit" in or make connections with people will not concern you anymore. Your confidence is going to transform tremendously and I honestly am loving this for you, pile 3! I see that you could get the promotion you should have had a long time ago, get the grade you wanted in class, etc. Regardless of what it is, your hard work is going to be acknowledged and rewarded. I also believe you will find some sort of remedy in your relationships and people will start to really cherish you and will treat you with the respect you deserve. Some of you could go to counseling and therapy as well that will provide you with the tools necessary to resolve past trauma. Pile 3, you are going to be able to find your voice again and realize your thoughts and ideas should be heard, they no longer have to be dismissed anymore.
Pile 4:
Shufflemancy -
Godspeed by Frank Ocean
Found Love by Sofya Wang
Ribs by Lorde
Forgiveness, Indecision, Worry, Gratitude, The Star, Eight of Swords, Ten of Cups, & Five of Cups (reversed)
I feel you are missing someone or something, pile 4. There is this nostalgic and dreamy energy that you have. It feels bittersweet and for the season of spring, you could be reminiscing on your past. Perhaps you are remembering memories of someone that was dear to you. Some of you could have experienced the loss of a loved one or there is a distance between you and a place, person, etc. This is causing you to feel worried about your future and ponder about if you have made the right decisions in life. I feel that in order for you to blossom in life, you will have to experience "growing pains". This feels like a coming of age story or wishing to regain your innocence and youth. No matter how old you are, as long as you are living at this very moment, you can do anything you set your mind to. Whether you are an adolescent, someone in their 30s, or even middle aged. You have a great life ahead of you but you will not be able to see this bright future of yours if you do not put yourself out there and at least try. Our memories can be great but also painful but we look to those moments for strength for when we need to realize how far we have come. Instead of feeling remorse about your past decisions or worrying about what's going to happen, find the beauty of the unknown. Practice gratitude and appreciate everything that brought you to this very moment. If you cannot forgive others, forgive yourself my love, forgive yourself for your past mistakes. You do not need to harbor these heavy feelings anymore. There are happy times and joyous moments with loved ones going to come to you seen, as soon as you reflect upon your beliefs. Journaling and practicing affirmations will help you navigate these feelings and build self esteem. This is a period of healing, pile 4. Please hold on just a little bit longer and have faith that things will get better!
Pile 5:
Shufflemancy -
Cigar by HA:TFELT
Mizu by Sophia Black
Kerosene by Crystal Castles
Peace, Self Esteem, Service, Happiness, The Temperance, Queen of Cups, Three of Wands, & The Fool
I remember a quote by Bruce Lee where he said "To be like water, my friend" and I believe that means to just go with the flow in life. If try to force things and it does not work, just try another way. It's pointless to get upset about your way of doing things isn't working, try another way! Instead of being stubborn, you can have endless opportunities to use your creative thinking skills to make your life easier and better. I believe for spring you should do some spring cleaning, whether is cleaning your home, saging your room, or going to a river to take a dip in the water. Now would be a good time to bask in the fruits of your labor and enjoy the fruition of things unfolding. To blossom at this point in your life, you need to take things slow, and appreciate what beauty is in your surroundings. You could start noticing things you never have before. Like "Oh I never knew I had this beautiful tree in my neighborhood!" or "Wow I didn't know this great restaurant was right around the corner of my home!". Just allow yourself to explore your options and not think about what needs to be perfect. This is going to be a period of happiness, peace, and relaxation for you. I overall see that you need to rest and make time to enjoy going out or even make your home a beautiful place. You need to Marie Kondo your life, pile 5! Do what it is you need to unwind from all the stress. Be generous and practice some self care. Go to a spa, get a massage, redecorate your home, drink tea, read a book, take a bath with salts or bath bombs, etc. These activities will help put you at ease and give you the time to think about what you like to do with your life. I see that you will travel, take trips, and focus on self love this spring. You are going to be your own best friend and put yourself for once instead of always being at service to others.
Pile 6:
Shufflemancy -
Dusk by Chelsea Wolfe
Happy Without Me by Chloe x Halle ft. Joey Bada$$
You Should Be Here by Kehlani
Pride, Growth, Purpose, Adversity, Queen of Pentacles, Four of Swords, Knight of Wands, & Ten of Wands
I believe you are being prideful and refusing to make a decision regarding a situation, pile 6. You need to face the music about your actions and what is holding you back. This could be pertaining to a relationship that is not helping you elevate yourself in life. Whether this is a ex, current partner, a situationship, etc. This on and off relationship, that you refuse to accept needs to end, is going to continue to drain you of your time and energy. If you are not seeing someone, then there are codependency issues that you need to understand where it comes. You could have this vice that you are very attached to and without it - you become sick, depressed, and unstable. You do not need anyone or anything to make you feel validated and worthy. You are an amazing person but no one can make you see that but you. You cannot want to get better if you keep depending on materialistic things or the feeble words of others to boost your self esteem. No one needs to have a purpose in life to deserve to have a wonderful life. Your purpose is being here. Destiny, fate, or karma cannot define your self worth and affect what choices you decide to make. Take back your power today and stop looking for other people or the universe to be the voice of reason you need. You have a choice and you can do whatever you wish with that said choice. Life can be challenging and there are bumps in the road but pile 6, you will feel so proud of yourself when you overcome the trials and the tribulations. You will blossom as an individual once you learn to dust the dirt off your shoulder and understand that no matter what happens you will be okay because you have yourself.
Pile 7:
Shufflemancy -
Call For Help by Pearly Drops
I know I'm Funny Haha by Faye Webster
Growing by JGrrey
Perseverance, Relationships, Humor, Grief, Ten of Swords, The Magician (Reversed), Four of Cups, & The Tower
Pile 7, I feel that you are someone who is considered to be all "peaches and sunshine". You naturally have a positive disposition about life and could use humor as a way to elevate the mood. You are a bright source of light for others in this world. You are someone people can go to when they are feeling down and troubled and that is a very beautiful thing. The downside to this, pile 7, is that you are experiencing your own troubles and hardships that no one can see. I don't believe you discuss with others about the grief you have experienced despite having loved ones you have a great connection with. To blossom as an individual, pile 7, you need to embrace being open with others and understand that you are still lovable if you are not always happy. You have a gorgeous smile and when you use it to mask your pain, it becomes a concern. You don't have to handle it all by yourself. Call a friend or a family member to talk about everything you've been dealing with, you could see people will understand or care more than you may realize. Yes other people could be dealing with something in life but it is possible to check on someone as well and make sure they're okay. You are not a burden and you are loved. I also interpret this as you needing to call and check on someone close to you. Whether that's a old friend, your parents, your siblings, or someone you have grown distant from. This could be someone you've known since childhood because I smelled crayons and heard "green eggs and ham". I believe this could also mean you need to reconnect with your inner child. You may not believe in things that a child believes anymore such as magic, fairytales, and mythical creatures. It is okay to engage in fantasies every once in a while, for those sweet, innocent moments helps get away from the world during trouble times. Look at pictures of you when you were young, visit your childhood home, eat a snack you used to loved as a kid, go to a park, watch cartoons, or buy yourself some coloring pencils, markers, toys, etc. Just do an activity that allows you to spend time with your inner child and have fun! In your youth, or growing up, some of you may have struggled with acne but for the month of spring I see that your skin will really start to clear up! For some of you, Melanie Martinez and Tierra Whack's music could be significant. You may have had a phase where you were a big fan of these artists or you should get into their music for it may pertain to your situation. Their song "copy cat" is a message for some of you. Your blossoming period could be uncomfortable in some aspects, pile 7. You may end a friendship with someone or feel the need to move on from what it is not serving you. This change in your life will help you find your way back to yourself. You could have felt disconnected or confused about what is your true identity. Once you shed other's expectations and desires on who you should be, you will be able to experience to true joy. Your spring blessing is to be able to feel secure and comfortable with you really are.
Pile 8:
Shufflemancy -
Let Go by Frou Frou
Freefall by KATRANADA ft. Durand Bernarr
Doctor, My Eyes by Khamari
Judgment, Health, Imagination, Balance, The Hermit, The Empress, Five of Cups, & Death
You are being called to take a leap of faith, pile 8. Freefall into this new period in your life and allow you to see the wonders of life. Have faith and trust that the universe to always catch you. Release your need to judge and constantly criticizing your or other people's imperfections. You are the most prosperous in life when you just let go of the bullshit. You have to be able to realize there is abundance even if you do not see it yet. This is a funny example but I remembered the meme of the girl rapping "but did you die tho?". You could be someone who is considered to be "melodramatic" (real) and act as if the world is ending just because of a minor inconvenience. You are here, what are you going to do about it? Are you gonna cry over spilled milk or continue to push on and do something that makes you happy. Find a balance in expressing certain emotions before you react. You will blossom as an individual when you learn to practice emotional intelligence and know that you are always going to be okay in the end. Have the mindset of "Asked me how I'm doing? I'm blessed, yes." I wrote this at 111 so that angel number is a sign for you to pay attention to your thoughts at this time and instead focus on your manifestations babe! I feel like your guides wish to tell you to stop acting bratty like they adore you but you have your moments where you let your emotions get the best of you and you start to act really spoiled. I'm hearing the lyrics "Good karma, that's my aesthetic, keep my conscious clear that's why i'm so magnetic" and I believe that is all I can reveal to you, pile 8. You already know what desires you seek and how to bring it into fruition, just make sure you stay humble and stop reacting to things that are pointless and won't pertain to you in the next 24 hours. Make sure to get a health check up as well this spring, your eye health could need to be examined or you may need to look into getting glasses or contacts.
Pile 9:
Shufflemancy -
Changing Seasons from the Persona 5 soundtrack
Bluetooth by Piri & Tommy
Borderline by SUNMI
Doubt, Empathy, Fear, Regret, The Moon, The Hanged Man, Page of Cups, & Five of Swords
I feel that this is pile is interested in Y2K, gaming, and technology. You could be more of a hands on person and enjoy objects that allow you to touch, mold, or shape things with your hands. Some of you could be neurodivergent and enjoy using tools that allow you to stim whether that is slime, clay, ceramics, etc. You are really good with your hands and solving things with technology. You could also have a future career in fields such as STEM, video game design, gaming, music production, computer programmer, etc. You are someone who has their unique way of thinking and this is intriguing to others. Your features could be very physically cute as well. This could be weird to say but to people they think of you as a tomodachi, they just want to put you in their pocket, and carry you around. People desire to take care of you. You may think your quirks are considered unlikeable but this is not true. You may not be everyone's cup of tea but there are plenty of people who find you beautiful, pile 9. I feel that there is someone who may even have a crush on you. You could feel things more intensely than others and could deal with feelings of anxiety. You may have trouble sleeping at night due to racing thoughts, thinking of past regrets, and feeling guilty for things that you have done. Pile 9, you have to let go these thoughts and realize that it is just a thought. I am remembering the song "Here Comes A Thought" from Steven Universe. You do not have to suffer because you have troubling thoughts or a mental condition that causes you to be different than others. You may think you are doing others a favor by keeping away and staying in isolation, but it is doing you more harm than good in the end. You may also feel stuck and that you won't be able to get your current circumstances but that is just an illusion. The doubts, the thoughts, the circumstances is all an facade. You can get past this and you can fall in love, make friends, or pursue your dreams exactly the way you are. You do not need to be like anyone else but you. You will blossom, pile 9, once you embrace your remarkable qualities and also your flaws. No one is perfect and just because you have either a condition or personality that may not click with everyone else, it does not mean you cannot be happy, successful, and accepted by others. This spring, you should turn over a new leaf for yourself. Try to start with small goals and take your time. I wish you the best of luck :)!
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A fluffy/ mild angsty valentines fic with Bucky where reader gets HIM flowers ( because of the whole guys don’t get flowers thing :((( ) maybe there’s some mutual pining and sweet confession? Like she gets the flowers for him because he makes some joke about not having had a valentine for nearly a century and she’s just like “absolutely not will not allow that >:(“ but he thinks it’s just a joke at first :(
Anyway thanks! Love you!
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Bloom.
bucky barnes x female reader
warnings - none
valentines masterlist. inbox. masterlist.
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“Are we almost done?”
Bucky looks so miserable, you can’t help but laugh.
“Yeah, we are. We just need flowers, and then we have everything on the list.”
He grabs the shopping cart and pushes it across the grocery store, determinedly marching in the right direction. You’re practically running to keep up with him.
“Which ones?”
You look at all the flowers, touching some of the petals gently as you decide.
“I’m not sure. What’s your favourite kind of flower, Buck?”
He looks at you with a blank expression.
“I don’t have one.”
“What?”
Now it’s your turn to look blankly at him.
“I’ve never been bought flowers. Why would I have a favourite type?”
You frown at him. The idea of Bucky never receiving flowers makes you much sadder than it should, but you’re trying to play it cool.
“Oh. Well… which of these do you like the look of the most? They’re going to go in the middle of the table in the kitchen, so they need to be bright. Give the room some colour.”
He circles the flower display a few times, looking around carefully. Eventually, he picks up a bouquet of tulips, all pinks and oranges and yellows.
“I like these.”
You smile softly, nodding your head.
“Good choice.”
You’re somewhat distracted as the two of you check out. You put the tulips in the bag carefully, glancing at Bucky every so often. He catches you looking, and can’t help but wonder what’s going on in that pretty little head of yours.
✵  ✵    ·  ✵    *  · ✵
You’ve been standing outside Bucky’s door for the better part of fifteen minutes.
He knows.
He heard your footsteps, can hear your chest heaving, lungs working overtime. He’s just waiting for you to make your own decision.
Eventually, you do. After thirty minutes, you decide to just do it. You’ve got nothing to lose.
You knock.
Bucky swings open the door as if he’s been waiting for you, standing patiently on the other side.
“Breathe, honey.”
You didn’t even realise you’d been holding your breath. You exhale, never breaking eye contact with the man in front of you.
“Hi, Buck.”
“Hi, you.”
“I got you something.”
“You did?”
You grab the bouquet from where you’ve leant it against the wall, holding it out to him.
He stops in his tracks, brows furrowed in confusion.
“They’re… for me?”
“Yeah.”
“Why?”
You inhale deeply, willing yourself to find some temporary courage.
“Because tomorrow is Valentine’s Day. And no one has ever bought you flowers.”
He’s smiling now, soft and knowing.
“You’re the kindest person I’ve ever met.”
He says it so sincerely, so genuinely, that it makes you want to cry. You hand the flowers to him, grinning as he admires them up close.
“They’re beautiful. You’re beautiful.”
That takes you by surprise.
You and Bucky have always had a careful, consistent friendship. Ever since he first barrelled into your life, you’ve thrown tender smiles his way, nodding your head in acknowledgement every time he passed you in the hallways. He warmed to you, slowly but surely. Your kindness, your generosity, your genuineness - you’ve charmed him delicately, somewhat accidentally.
You’ve also been in love with him since day one.
You never thought to mention it - he’s healing, learning, growing as he goes, and you don’t want to halt his progress. So, you’ve pined from a distance, gently and quietly.
“Buck… will you be my valentine?”
He beams at you, the most luminescent smile you’ve ever seen from him.
“Oh, sweetheart. I’ve been working up the courage to ask you that every year since I met you. Knew you’d beat me to it.”
You laugh, stepping in closer to him. He puts the flowers down carefully, reaching out to cup your face in his hands.
“Can I kiss you, my valentine?”
You nod, already leaning in. He presses his lips to yours, and he swears he feels flowers bloom in his ribcage, bright and alive.
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nsharks · 4 months
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bleeding blue | apocalypse au
part fifteen —other parts
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pairing: Simon "Ghost" Riley x fem!reader words: 3.7k tags: death. blood. cannibalism mention. zombies of course. AFAB reader. single dad ghost. there will be sex but it isn't here yet. slow burn!!! enemies to lovers. summary: After losing your companions, you run into a skull-masked man and his daughter. They are your last hope for survival.
Pearly sunlight weaves through the trees, casting freckles across the calm current of the creak. Somewhere, a raven bleats loudly, but your ears block out the sound. The skin between your brows wrinkles with concentration as you tightly grip the wooden makeshift spear, its carved point hovering just above the water.
Numerous fish writhe below you, and your eyes dart between them studiously before finally settling on the meatiest one. With a quick stab, your spear pierces the water's surface, but all it hits is the mucky bottom of the creak. The fish startles with a splash and swims off downstream. 
"Fuck me," you huff, standing up from your squatting position on the rock to soothe the growing ache in your thighs.
Fishing shouldn't be much different than hunting, yet, it's been hours and all you have to show for it is a small chub the size of your palm. With a sigh, you decide your craving for fish isn't worth all this effort and leap off the rock, carrying your measly catch in one hand and spear in the other. Maybe the still waters of the pond could be an easier spot to try someday.
You chose the creak over the pond because it's a greater distance from camp. The longer walk allows you to fixate on the emerald green leaves fluttering in the breeze and the soft chatter of swallows that are returning after their winter migration. Everything is starting to turn into Blue's favorite color. For the first time, you departed the cabin without a jacket, opting for only the long-sleeve tee from Ghost. You had the sleeves rolled to your elbows while fishing, but as you trek back through the wild grasses, you push them down and allow the fabric to brush your knuckles. 
There are hardly any flowers left on the Pink Sorrel after all your foraging. It's a shame they taste so good because the petals are a beautiful fuschia. Arriving at camp, you amble over the plucked stems, bound across the trench with ease, and spot Blue on the other side of the gate offering Grim a wad of grass.
The moment you returned yesterday, she had asked how training with Ghost went. That was quick, she'd observed. Weasling past the rules of your friendship, you gave her a half-lie: He went easy on me this first time. She didn't seem fully convinced that Ghost and 'going easy' belonged in the same sentence together.
"Hey," you greet. "Open the gate for me?"
Grim is given a pet across his back before she leaps up to undo the locks. 
“Hey. How’d it go?” She looks at your near-empty hand. "Fucking noodles. That's it? I thought there were lots of fish there."
"There are. I just suck at catching them."
She gives you an apologetic smile. "Oh— Ghost was looking for you, by the way."
It takes you a moment to respond. "He was?"
"Not sure what for." Her brows furrow. "I'm also not sure where he went. He was here, and then—" Her blue eyes glimmer like water in the sunlight as they shift to something in the distance. "Oh, there he is."
The very person you'd spent hours of alone time trying not to think about arrives as a shadow, lugging what appears to be—you squint—a fucking corpse behind him. Upon closer inspection, it is certainly a body, and with how wonky the limbs look as they drag against the ground, it must be a Grey. That's a little more reassuring, and a lot less bothersome, than if it were a human corpse. 
He drops the corpse in front of the trench, rubs his gloved hands together, and then passes through the parted gate. 
"Is that what you wanted Twix for?" Blue asks, nodding to the Grey.
Ghost explains himself in an even more gruff baritone than usual. "Knew I smelled something." He speaks at you. "I wanted you to check south while I checked north."
"Oh. Sorry," you say lamely and hold up the small chub. "I was, uh, fishing. Looks like you found the source, though. Just one?"
He nods. "Only found one. Could be others so we'll keep an eye out."
"Why did you bring it here?" you ask curiously. 
Blue is the one to answer. "To burn it. Sometimes it seems like they attract each other, haven't you noticed?"
"Right," you grimace. "Blood and rot. Their favorites."
Setting down the catch and spear, you help Ghost gather some wood from the modest pyramid stacked beside the cabin. He nudges the Grey with a booted foot, making it tumble limply into the trench. Starting the fire in there should keep the flames contained.
As you silently place the wood and some kindling over the carcass, your mind is in two places at once. With Ghost right next to you, it's impossible to not think about yesterday; how it felt to be grabbed by him, how he questioned you again about the ammo trip, and how you can't help but detest the thought of him looking at you in pity like he once he did. 
You also think about how much you fucking hate Greys. Christ, they are disgusting. Your fingers accidentally brush against the paper-thin skin that hangs off the bones and a shudder travels up your spine.
Ghost starts the fire with a match and the two of you watch the flames catch, quietly at first— then, they roar through the corpse, quickly turning it black. Bitter smoke intermingles with the crisp spring air and the smell has you coughing into your arm.
Blue has taken it upon herself to avoid the fire, making an audible gagging sound before scooping up Grim. In her absence, you shift from foot to foot, stealing a glance at Ghost. He watches the ash build up and the flames tamper down in mild interest. 
Your fingers curl up into balls, fisting the excess fabric. "Are you worried about more?" you ask him.
It's the first thing you've said to him - actually said to him - since cutting your training short. He loosens a breath and slightly shrugs his broad shoulders. "No. I told you. We never see more than a few at a time." You weren't worried, but if you were, his dismissal of the subject would reassure you. "You should be careful until I finish your bow, though. Unless you're good at throwing knives."
"I'm not," you almost snort, voice no louder than it needs to be. "But Blue is quite good at it. She's been killing squirrels for me."
He hums his response, a low sound that gets lost in the crackle of embers, and you wonder if that's him showing a lack of interest in this kind of conversation with you. With a deep inhale, you change the subject to one you can't ignore.
"Ghost— I want to apologize," you turn to face him, straightening your shoulders. "I wasted your time yesterday. It won't happen again. If we could... give it another try, I would like that."
The smoke is starting to fade. Ghost breaks his gaze from it to study you. You try not to shrink away, wondering what he's thinking. If he feels pity, it's impossible to detect in the dark irises set behind his mask, though, you've never been able to find much of anything in them. 
"You didn't waste my time, Twix. I have an interest in your capabilities." 
"What?" 
"If you're going to be staying here," he elaborates, "—then your strength is of value to me. I'd like to know that if I ask you to do something, you can do it. That if shit happens again, I can rely on you."
"You can," you breathe out. "I am... capable."
"You are," he agrees, looking away. "You're good with a bow. You think quick. But you're still weak, and you doubt yourself." The blunt comments make your brows lower, but you can't help but feel satisfied with the glimpses of approval. "Yesterday was my fault. You weren't ready for it and I should've known that."
"I am ready," you protest, lips parting as you shake your head. "Let me try again. I don't want to be coddled."
"I'm not going to coddle you," he replies in a firm drawl. "I want you stronger first. Let's start there."
“Okay.”
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A hand.
There's a hand on your shoulder, heavy and firm, offering a slight shake. With a gasp, your eyes fly open to darkness, only the white of a skull visible above you, illuminated by a sliver of moonlight. 
"What the hell?" are the first words you sputter, voice harsh and raw from sleep. You grip your throat to clear it. 
He scans your face. "Get up. Come on."
"What? What... what fucking time is it?"
"Almost dawn. Let's go."
It takes a few deep breaths to calm the rush of adrenaline ignited by his abrupt wake-up call. Go where? you think to ask, but instead, you slick a hand through your hair, warily rubbing your eyes to adjust to the lack of light.
Somehow you end up outside, wading through the sprawled-out fog as you follow behind his silhouette, the morning so early and quiet that it would've felt like a dream if not for your crunching footsteps. You braid your into a single, tight braid along the way. With such shitty sleep, you're too out of it to even scowl at his backside, wondering how getting up at this hour will in any way make you stronger. 
The answer is in the two axes he carries and the towering oak tree he stops in front of, your eyes climbing up the height of it before landing back down on Ghost. Your hands are forced out of your coat pockets when an axe is offered to you, fingers curling around the handle and abs tightening from the surprising weight of it.
Confusion rolls around in your gut. Slowly, you ask, "Um. You... want me to cut this thing down?"
"We need more wood after yesterday." He inclines his head and gives a tap of his own axe to the thick trunk. "Good size for you to start with."
"It's huge," you mutter under your breath. "Why do we have to do this so early?"
If there's any reasoning to it at all, he doesn't bother sharing. Rather, he stalks over to another tree about ten meters away. The calm air is soon shattered by the rough sound of metal biting wood as he starts effortlessly cutting the trunk. A large part of you considers dropping the axe and leaving without a word, but you ignore it.
"Alright then," you whisper to yourself. 
It's not the first time you've chopped down a tree. You used to help Paul with it, and truthfully, you're surprised Ghost has never asked you to do chores like this sooner. It's certainly bigger than the skinny, young trees you used to go for, evident in how little of a dent you make with the first swing.
Either you're as weak as Ghost claims, or this axe of his is heavier than the one Paul had because your biceps feel strained by the third hit.
"Have you never done this before?"
The voice at your back nearly makes you drop the axe. Whirling around, you face the colossal presence of him and wonder how you didn't notice it sooner.
"I have." You rest the thick blade on the ground, grumbling. "Do you have a thing for sneaking up on people?"
"Be more aware of your surroundings." His tone teeters towards admonishing, and he looks you over before ticking up a brow. "And fix your stance before you throw your bloody back out."
He nudges the toe of his boot against yours, forcing you to spread your feet further apart. Your lips roll together as he grunts in approval. "Try again now."
When he takes a step back, you face the tree again, bending your elbows before extending them sharply. The blade cuts deeper this time, if only by a little.
"You're focusing too much on your arms," he remarks behind your shoulder. 
Your eyebrow twitches. "I'm... I'm holding the axe with my arms. Why would I not focus on them?"
"When you're shooting arrows, what muscles do you use the most?"
Thinking back to those lessons from Paul, you answer almost immediately. "My back." It's always the part that gets most sore. "And my... my shoulders, I guess."
"Focus more on those."
His advice helps. The next swing deals considerable damage to the bark. You turn to see his response, but he's already gone back to his tree.
The next few days involve so much chopping and sawing that you think you might be starting to hate wood and all of its forms. After the trees are down, you have to cut them into sizeable logs. The back-and-forth motion leaves your arm numb. You quickly realize why Ghost is making you get up early for this work— once the sun is out, it becomes miserable, cold sweat cascading down your back and temples. 
Blue decides this is not the kind of training she's interested in watching. You don't see much of her except during dinner where she offers to cook the squirrels she's caught for you. You don't object. You pick the meat apart down to the needly bones, wiggle your sore toes of their confinements, and knock out earlier than either of them. Fatigue goes back to claiming you swift and heavy, like a current that pulls you down, down, down. The dreams sit behind a dark wall, blocked for now. 
It goes on like this for a whole week, and somewhere along the way, you stop hating it. The grunts that leave your mouth are laced with exertion and focus. Your arms don't hurt as much. You split the logs apart as your mind fills with thoughts of everything you hate. Greys. Death. Pity. You imagine breaking all those things into a hundred, rotten pieces. It feels... good.
One morning, you awaken to sunlight already bleeding through the plywood, and confusion sits you up. You look around, wondering why Ghost didn't get you up sooner, only to find Blue lying belly-down on the raggedy rug, flipping through one of her new magazines.
"Where's Ghost?" 
"Good morning to you, too," she sings. Her chin inclines from where it rests in her palm. "I decided you need a different kind of training today. He's setting it up."
"You... you decided that, huh?"
She hums. "I made you breakfast. Go eat." She waves her hand. "I'm sure he'll be done soon."
You have no idea what she's talking about, but your stomach guides you to the cooked meat calling your name. She points out things in the magazine, like old celebrities and ridiculous perfume ads, cute boys and yummy sweets she wishes she could try; you nod along as you eat.
When he returns, she perks up. Practically tugs on your arm. You have to remind her that you're still barefoot. She impatiently groans the entire time you are lacing up your boots, taking your sweet time on purpose. 
The pond is where she leads you. That place where you first saw her.
Except today, there is a thin log stretched across one end to the other. A bridge.
"We have got to work on your balance, my student," Blue announces, hands on her hips. A gentle, warm breeze tousles her hair and she swipes it from her face. "We can't have a repeat of you-know-what."
Your brows shoot up and a chuff of breath leaves your nose. "Are you trying to say I have no sense of balance?"
"That's exactly what I'm saying. Come on, now."
You almost forgot Ghost followed the two of you out here until he sits on a tree stump with his carving knife and the bow he's making. He's been working on it for a few hours every day. Today, when you steal a glance as Blue clasps your hand and leads you to the homemade bridge, it almost looks like a bow, finally taking on a curved shape. You can't see much of it, though, because soon you are being instructed to cross the log.
"Without falling," Blue adds. 
"Easy," you tease, shrugging. 
"Prove it."
The log is about the width of the metal beam, but much shorter. You cross over it, arms outstretched at your sides and boots hovering a few feet above glistening water that is teeming with fish. When you step down on the other side, you shoot Blue a grin.
She rubs her chin. "Not bad, not bad. Again."
You do it again with ease, even though your muscles are still stiff from your morning workouts. 
"Okay, this time, we're going to make it more realistic." 
By realistic, she means baring her teeth in a growl and sticking her arms out like a Grey. All of a sudden, you are being chased across the log, Blue running behind you. Explicatives leave your lips until your boot misses a step and you fall into the water. This time, the shallow pond offers a comfortable temperature that doesn't send your body into panic mode. You break the surface, able to stand up on the rocky bottom, and throw your wet hair out of your face as laughter bubbles up your throat on its own accord.
You look up at Blue, playfully glaring. She smirks.
"Come here, Grey," you say.
You grab her by the ankle and pull her down into the water with you. She gasps and giggles, thrashing around in her soaked clothes as you splash water in her face. 
"Or," you taunt, "Should I say Amelia?"
Her eyes widen. "How did you—" 
Then, she's leaping at you, pushing your head under the water. "Don't ever call me that."
"Or what?" You tease and swim away, scaly fish brushing against your ankles as the wide legs of your jeans ride up. "You'll kill me?"
"Might have to!"
You're not sure how long the two of you swim in there. Minutes. Maybe an hour. Until your fingertips are pruney like how they used to get when you used to swim in the pool with your sister.
You hoist yourself out of the pond and sit by the water's edge, drenched shirt clinging to your breasts uncomfortably, but you don't care. You've felt far more uncomfortable things. The buttery sunlight kisses your exposed cheeks as you wring out your hair, Blue sitting beside you to do the same thing.
She peels off her wet jeans, probably uncomfortable in them. You would do the same if you were eleven and didn't care. On her thigh, the thick scar from her bullet wound blemishes the soft, pale skin.
"I'm a better teacher than Ghost, huh?" she says.
"So far," you nod, glancing at him. When you do, his eyes meet yours across the short distance. Only for a second. Before they flicker back down to the bow.
"He hates swimming, you know."
You look at her. "Oh yeah?"
"Yeah. He never really goes in with me." She shrugs and buries her fingers in the grass. "Hey. Look. There are those violets I told you about."
You follow the direction of her eyes and sure enough, a patch of wild violets decorate the ground, gently bent in the breeze. As your clothes dry, the two of you pluck them. They are beautiful. Dark purple petals. You braid them into her hair. She tries to do the same for you, but her braiding skills need some work. It's a nice break from the past week you've had, your sore limbs sprawled against the grass to dry.
It's when the sun starts to lower that Blue puts her jeans back on. Your clothes are still wet, and the wind is starting to pick up, spreading gooseflesh across your skin. 
"Here."
The familiar low voice announces his presence. Tucking your wet hair behind your ears, you look up at Ghost. The two of you haven't exchanged many words except for his occasional correction of your form while cutting wood. 
He stands against the sun. You take the finished bow from him in quiet awe. It's even nicer up close, the smoothed oak caressing your palms as you glide them up and down the length of this new weapon. The first one he gave you was made for a child, but this one is larger, the perfect size for you. Your index finger gives a pluck to the string, feeling the hum of vibrations. He must have just added that. 
"Thank you," you tell him honestly. Whatever uncertainty or irritation you might feel about him doesn't change the swell of gratitude you feel in this moment. It’s a tangible thing that sits in your chest. “It's... great, really."
"Might take some getting used to,” he says gruffly.
You shrug. "That's alright."
You glance to your left where Blue is still changing. With a swallow, you hold the bow tight to your chest. "Do you think I'm ready to try more tomorrow? Not just the wood. I feel like... I feel like I've been getting stronger from it already."
He gives a short nod. "Tomorrow, then."
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