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adelheidvonschicksal · 4 months

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I don't even like thinking about toji taking megumis girl. Like, in my mind he's trying to atone 😪

Yes!!! Let’s talk about it!

He loves ‘Gumi so much. He was just having a bit of a ✨ emotional breakdown ✨ during that whole selling him off deal. And personally I was coming off the Shouto train so it hits twice as hard cause he always gets his GF taken by Endeavor or Dabi (sometimes Bakugo), which Dabi makes sense since he HATES Shouto. But post-atonement Enji 😭I totally get the kink though (tbh I kinda like it in reverse 🤭). There’s actually a really GOOD fic I like called U&I with Bully!Megumi and you sleep with Toji to kinda get back at him after finding out he’s been using you. I like the revengeful ones or when it’s a 2-parter and they find out what you did.

BUT I DIGRESS, okay so I got some big brainrot and I was half asleep and started thinking about it and ahh! Plus I didn't post for his birthday so this is like the most slap together, grammarless of my brain rotting (and you brought it about Nonnie, so you gotta take responsibility lol) but:

»»———-　　———-««

(SFW) Imagine okay, like a modern AU: Toji is trying to be a better dad after the endless benders after losing his wife. He went from floating from random woman to woman, trying to catch that feeling again like when he was with his first wife. It always devolves into the same thing with him squeezing them dry for every penny he can get before moving on to the next with Megumi in tow. Sometimes it didn’t include Megumi, Toji would leave him alone for weeks to months at a time as he got older, occasionally bringing home some new mom that he’ll eventually abandon at the end of the day or that eventually gets tired of him; tired of both of them because Megumi refused to be nice to anyone Toji brought home.

But it finally hits him to be better, to try to be a good parent. Sadly, it’s too late. Megumi is a teenager now, one year from graduating high school and going to college, where Toji will definitely not have any chance to atone. He doesn’t blame the kid, it’s his own fault.

However, he sees a lot of himself in his son. The apathy that borders depression, the lone wolf attitude, the quietness and independent streak, the very small number of friends (if any, because Megumi NEVER brings anyone over or talks about school at all, usually avoids talking to him in general). He isn’t really sure what to say to the kid, not that he’s figured it all out himself or that Megumi would even listen to him. Indifference was the best he could hope for most of the time.

Then one day, he shows up at home with someone. A girl, even. And you’re cute, way too chipper to be following around his wallflower of a kid. Always entering and leaving with a “Hi, Mr. Fushiguro. Bye, Mr. Fushiguro. Looking good today, Mr. Fushiguro. Love the haircut, Mr. Fushiguro. Rocking that sweater, Mr. Fushiguro. Have a good day, Mr. Fushiguro.”

You seem too good for nobodies like them; and when he teases Megumi with the notion, his son claims you’re just his class partner for this semester, nothing else. But Toji sees how soft he gets around you, the little bit of extra effort he puts in trying to make conversation when you’re over, the blush and grouchy embarrassed complaints he makes whenever Toji tells him to leave his room door open when you guys work on projects in there. The complaints usually get a little quieter given the right laugh from you.

You have a good effect. Megumi seems a little less tense, walking the world with a little less cynicism even though it’s still clearly there. He starts hanging out with two other kids from his school, Megumi claims they’re your friends, not his, but Toji has seen the pink haired boy over twice without you. Overall, you all seem like a really good kids.

One weekend you pop because you and your friends were in the neighborhood and wanted to see if Megumi wanted to join in on whatever you’re doing. Unfortunately, Megumi’s not home, but it gives Toji a small window to prod you a little about your relationship with Megumi. He’s observant enough to notice by now that the two of you like each other but he just wanted to hear it from you, and you make the most darling lovesick face when he asks. As far as he can piece together, you’re not dating officially but the entire world treats you as you are.

When Megumi finds out what happened though. He doesn’t like it, and he makes it clear that the interference was highly unappreciated it. Toji is simply sitting in the kitchen and trying to enjoy his apple, and he’s getting the interrogation treatment by this little gremlin (affectionately) half his size.

“What were the two of you talking about?” “Nothing in particular.” “If you don’t need anything then don’t bother her.” “Why? You don’t want me speaking to her?” “No. She isn’t your type anyway.”

Then, Megumi starts going off on a tangent of why Toji shouldn’t be interested. You’re too young, you're still months off from 18, you don’t have any money for him to leech, and there’s no way you can decide on a movie together with that age gap; 'You’ll kick the bucket 30 years before her' is the meanest one though.

Based on the disrespect, it still looks like Toji has a lot of work to put in but it’s almost cute, in an grouchy, bratty (also affectionately) sea urchin type way that he’s getting so worked up over you. He thinks the kid will combust if he mentions that he does think you’re cute (in an overly energetic bubbly kind of way), and it makes him release a short chuckle as he resists the intrusive thought, which only serves to make Megumi’s frustration even worse.

Normally, he'd get tired at this point and ask if Megumi was done mouthing off yet, but this time it makes him glad to see Megumi getting so worked up over something. It’s a good feeling to know his actions didn’t completely ruin his son, that he didn't completely destroy Megumi's ability to care about life like his former family and the world had once done to him. It makes smile the tiniest bit even as Megumi seems to try to trudge away after making his point. Whatever point there was to be had. The boy is such a chronic overthinking about everything and everyone, including if you’re one of those girls at the school that squeal when they see him pick him up at school on the rare occasion.

“Hey,” Toji calls out to get his attention. “Do you know what you’re doing?” It’s not the best words but it’s the only way to sum up the familiar feelings he gets of his past, right after he left his family, right before he met Megumi’s mom. And after losing her without ever really making the most of everything back then and treasuring the moments together. “It’s hard to find something like that. Don’t do anything you’ll regret.”

He can sense the tension draining from Megumi, the panic and shaky nervousness from seconds ago leaving in the form of drooped shoulders and a soften, mildly confused expression as he looks back at him. Something seems to finally click in that overly worked brain of the younger Fushiguro and he mumbles, “I know.”

And Megumi gets that look again, that quiet one, too caught up in his own head.

"Do I need to make room for a daughter-in-law in that case?" he asks lazily before taking another bite of his apple, the chewing echoing. It's enough to earn some grumbles and a red face. He smirks when the boy quickly decides to hobble back to his room and hide away in embarassment. Like a normal kid.

And Toji thinks that maybe…a small maybe… that maybe they’ve gotten a little closer. If only in that moment. Regardless, he really hopes that the talk is one of those things the school already covered because he really doesn’t want to be responsible for that.

#megumi x reader #megumi fushiguro x reader #jjk x reader #jujutsu kaisen x reader #megumi fluff #female reader

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dakotalun · 1 year

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Want | Eddie Munson

pairing: Eddie Munson X Fem Reader

summary: Eddie hangs out with someone and you confront him about it.

warnings: angst, yelling, self-doubt

word count: 1.9k

a/n: shit haven't posted in a little bit, but hey getting back into it with a little Eddie angst!

*******NOT MY GIF, CREDIT TO OWNERS*******

We both stormed into the trailer. It's been heated ever since this morning at the coffee shop. One of the workers thought I was cute and wrote his number on my cup. I thought it was a cute gesture but when Eddie saw it he flipped out.

"You can't just go around getting other guys' numbers!" He was furious about it as if I had asked for the number in the first place.

"I didn't ask him to find me attractive and prompt him to give me his number, I was texting YOU the entire time!" That went on for a good half hour before my alarm went off alerting me that I had an hour before work.

"I have work soon, and I still need to shower," I grab my towel off the back of a chair, "We're not talking about this anymore."

But sadly that was only the beginning of this day-long fight.

---

I get a call from Eddie right before my lunch break begins.

"Hey, babe."

"Hey, what's up?" I can't help the smile that forms on my lips upon hearing his voice.

"Just checking in. Making sure we're okay after this morning. We are okay, right?" I can hear the slight pain in his voice as if I'd say no to his question.

"Yes, we're okay. You wanna grab lunch together today? I heard of this new Chinese spot down the street and I thought it could be good."

"I'd love to but I have a Hellfire thing and then I've got, um," He stops short of his sentence.

"Got what? Eds, are you ok?"

"Hm oh yeah look I've gotta run, talk later. Bye love you." Then the line goes dead. Weird Eddie's never declined lunch with me, ever. Why was he in such a rush anyways?

I try to push the thoughts out of my mind and focus on work for the rest of the day. But a huge part of my mind wonders why Eddie is acting so strange. Was something bad going on between us? Did I do something wrong?

At 5:30 pm I'm walking home, tired and hungry. I decide to take a shortcut through the woods to get back to the trailer park, which Eddie had shown me a while ago. The walk wasn't that bad, there was a slightly clear path on the way. As I walk I hear voices in the distance.

The further I walk the louder they get. There are two of them, one a high-pitched one, who seems to be laughing a lot, and another one, deeper, quieter. I try my best to avoid any sticks or dry leaves so as to not disturb the two. Then I hear it. The loud boisterous laugh, one I could pick out from any crowd, Eddie's laugh.

What the hell was Eddie doing in the middle of the woods so late? And who the hell was he with? I crouch down a little and walk closer to the voices, trying to get a look at them. And there I see it. Eddie, my Eddie, sitting at an old wooden picnic table with the popular, golden girl, Chrissy Fucking Cunningham.

My heart races, my stomach churns, and my head spins. My body refuses to move, my eyes refuse to turn away. Eddie and Chrissy are sitting across from each other, faces close together, laughing and smiling like their old friends who haven't seen each other in months. As I look closer at the pair I notice Eddie's lunch tin, the one he uses for deals.

He'd told me he quit selling months ago. I told him I wasn't comfortable with him putting himself in danger like that, and he happily agreed. So why was he carrying it now, and why with Chrissy?

I run off into the woods, trying my best to remember the way Eddie'd shown me. I finally reach the trailer park and start the walk to me and Eddie's shared one, which is on the other side of the lot.

I'm barely a few feet away from our front door when I hear the loud metal music pouring from the van. I look over my shoulder and there's Eddie, looking as handsome as ever.

"Hi, sweetie! How was work?" He closes the driver's door and heads up to me, planting a small kiss on the top of my head. He sounds out of breath.

"It was fine. Long," I pull out my keys and walk up the steps to the door, "How was your day?" I'm hoping he'll explain why he was out with Chrissy.

"Eh lame. I can't wait to finally graduate, I am so done with high school!" He walks in behind me, shedding his jacket and throwing it on the couch before plopping down. I walk to the bedroom and grab some pajamas to wear after my shower.

"What do you want for dinner tonight?" I hear Eddie say before turning on the t.v.

"I don't know, pizza?" I walk back out to the small living room with a towel in hand, "Or maybe we can go to that good Italian place you love?"

"Whatever you want, I'm not really hungry," I want to ask about Chrissy but then he'd know I was out there earlier.

"You sure? I'm happy with anything, babe."

"Yeah, just get what you want. I'm gonna take a shower, wash this day off of me."

"Oh okay, see you in a bit," I hum a response before turning on my heels and going to the small bathroom. Once I'm inside I lock the door and turn on the shower. I shed my clothes, step inside and sink to the floor. Cries being drowned out by the rush of water.

After what feels like hours in the hot stream of water, I climb out and wrap myself in a towel. I open the door and quickly close my eyes at the blast of cold air that hits me. I smell the familiar scent of pepperoni and mushroom in the trailer. Walking out of the bathroom and into Eddie and I's joint room I grab a pair of pajamas to wear.

After getting dressed and drying my hair a bit I walk out to the living room to get some dinner. Eddie is sitting on the couch, eating a piece of pizza and watching some slasher movie on the tv.

"Hey," He turns to me, "Where did you go today?"

"Work," I sit down on the other end of the couch.

"Oh yeah, what were you doing all day?"

I sigh and take a bite of pizza, "Just some paperwork and filing. You know the usual." I swallow my bite and hesitate before asking my question, "What did you do today?"

Eddie's eyes stay glued on the screen, almost as if he's scared to look at me. "Just school,"

"Nothing else? You were out kinda late."

"Oh, I guess I saw an old friend afterward. But that was nothing."

Finally, we're getting somewhere, "Oh that's nice. Who were you with?" I lean forward a little bit, eager to hear an answer other than 'Chrissy'.

"Just someone I went to middle school with," Eddie says.

"Who?" I ask again, pressing a little harder.

"Her name is Chrissy. Why?"

"No reason, I just like to know who your friends are," I get up and throw my plate in the sink.

"I wouldn't call her a 'friend' more like an old acquaintance," He gets up and follows me into the kitchen, reaching for another slice of pizza.

"Is she pretty?" I ask, fiddling with my hands.

"Pretty?! Yeah, I guess," Eddie gives me a questioning look.

"She must be if you were with her all day," I walk over to the fridge and grab a beer, "That or you were selling to her. Which can't be the case since you promised me you wouldn't do that anymore."

Eddie stops mid-bite, his eyes growing wide at my words. He drops his plate down on the counter, "Wha- How do you know I was out with her today?"

"What do you mean? You just told me," A small smirk plays on my lips before I take a sip of my drink.

"Yeah I know but how the hell did you know I was with her all day? I never told you that!" His voice is louder now.

"I saw you together," His eyes grow huge, almost as if they could pop out at any moment, "At the picnic table in the woods. She was laughing and smiling, I think I even saw her put her hand on your arm at some point."

I turn around from the fridge and look him dead in the eye, "Did you fuck her?" I whisper, almost afraid to speak loudly enough for him to hear me.

Eddie's face goes white, "No! God no!"

"Then why did you have your lunchbox with you? I know that you only use it for deals," Tears start threatening to spill from my eyes.

"Jesus Christ because I had a deal earlier that day. And before you say anything, I know I said I would stop selling but they offered me like 600 for it and we really need the money babe," He looks at me with pain in his eyes.

"Why didn't you tell me you were going to meet her?" I finally can't hold back my tears any longer and they fall.

"Because I knew you'd worry and freak out if you found out! Just like you are now!"

My voice cracks, "How the hell am I supposed to believe you, Eddie? You're out with a pretty girl for god knows how long then come home late and just expect me to believe she's 'just an old friend'?!"

"Yes! Because I love you and I would never do anything to hurt you! You know that" Eddie takes a step toward me, but I step back.

I place my beer on the counter and wrap my arms around myself, "I want to believe you Eds I really do but," I struggle to find the words, "I don't trust you anymore, I can't. You lied to me and you kept secrets from me! What else are you hiding? What else have you done that I don't know about?"

Eddie grabs my shoulders and pulls me towards him, "Baby please listen to me," His voice is soft and delicate, "Do you know how much I fucking love you?"

The words hurt me when I think of them but I need to know the answer, "Yeah but, do you want me?"

Eddie drops his hands from my shoulders and pulls away. He looks at me, the tears that have stained my cheeks, and the way my lip quivers. It breaks him to know that his hanging out with Chrissy has hurt you this much. He can't come up with a good explanation or a way to make you feel better so he grabs his jacket and keys, opens the front door, and leaves.

I crumble to my knees, cries breaking out for the third time that day. My stomach tenses and my head becomes light, making me dizzy. I cry for god knows how long, holding myself on the kitchen floor of the small trailer. Knowing that I just ruined the only good thing that has ever come into my life.

Eddie Taglist: @ali-r3n @dixontardis

#eddie stranger things #munson #eddie munson #eddie my love #eddie my beloved #female reader #oneshot #smut #eddie munson smut #eddie munson x reader #eddie munson x female reader #eddie munson fic #eddie munson x you #stranger things #stranger things 4 #st4 #stranger things season 4 #eddie x reader

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soyouthinkucanwrite · 3 years

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The money thing (part 1/2) - Daniel Ricciardo

It's always the little things, isn't it? The smallest stupidest things make almost no difference and then make all the difference in the world. They make everything special, but they also have the power to tear everything appart.

You and Daniel fight about money for the thousand time and he's had enough of it.

Warnings: super angst, but with a happy ending :)

Guys, this turned out WAY BIGGER than I expected, so I'm just gonna do a part 2, okay? Okay, thanks for understanding!

Song that inspired me: A list by HVOB

You and Daniel had been dating for a couple months now, having met through a common friend and hitting off almost instantly. You lived in Amsterdam and he, well he lived all over the world really, but his "time off" (meaning not racing) was spent between Monaco and London (for work), and Amsterdam now too, of course.

The changes were small and subtle at the beginning, like your weekends being spent traveling to meet him wherever in the world he was and consequently spending almost all your savings on plane tickets. You never complained to him (you planned on spending the money traveling anyway, so you didn't see the point), but didn't accept when he offered to buy your tickets, either. There's been some awkwardness around the subject but it usually died on its own.

*beginning of flashback*

"You’d have gotten here in time if you'd gotten the early flight like I told you" you remembered him saying that time you got in the paddock after the qualifying session had begun and couldn’t kiss him good luck.

"Baby, I told you. It was crazy expensive! Absurd even!"

"(y/n) for god's sake! What are we saving money for? I told you, you have my credit card number, I've offered to get you one, this is ridiculous, I can't believe I literally earn millions and my girlfriend wasn't there with me because the ticket was too expensive! I'll fucking fly you private if I have to!" he was almost yelling in his driver's room. You could only stare from the corner.

He took a deep breath running his hands through his hair. "Sorry. It's just... it was crap out there. I needed you" you grimaced at his words.

"Sorry. I really am..." you tried to approach him. "I'm here now?" you touched his arm. "It can't have been that bad, you're still on the top 10 and we both know what you can do from the 8th car..." you smiled at him.

*end of flashback*

He started to spend much more of his time off with you at your place, so you decided to get a place by yourself (having a roommate was great for company and splitting the rent, but having a roommate there while you guys just wanted some much-needed privacy was not working). Then there were more traveling to meet him, furniture for the new place, clothing for all the events (GPs or not), uber rides here and there... all of that without mentioning that you weren't being able to get the freelance jobs you used to get to make some extra money, so yeah, to say things were tight was an understatement. You tried to do all your shopping alone, so he wouldn't offer and you wouldn't refuse or be awkward about it, but Daniel seem to be glued to you whenever you were in the same city (not that you’re complaining).

The thing is, you always had trouble dealing with money. Sure, you liked to pay for your own stuff so as to not owe anything to anyone (especially boys), but it was so much deeper than that. Ever since a kid, you hated asking for money from your parents, and sometimes even the thought of buying stuff that was a bit more expensive made you sick. You couldn't explain why, you just felt guilty having so much and knowing that most people have never even seen that amount. It's not that you didn't want to spend it and save for the sake of it, you just didn't handle the idea of money very well. Needless to say, dating a millionnaire was bound to cause trouble in the relationship for you.

You were currently at his place in Monaco. It was the summer break and you had decided to spend some days just chilling at home, just the two of you - which you were glad since going out means hair, makeup, clothes, accessories, shoes... and, let's be honest, the kind of places he usually took you is not the kind of places you just throw something together last minute (the Instagram models and other driver's girlfriends looking you up and down were enough to make you think about spending money you did not have to hire a stylist or something like that). The whole situation was really stressing you out and you knew you would have to be honest with him eventually, instead of only dodging the subject and refusing most of his offers to pay. You tried to. You kind of tried. You suggested staying at home, in bed, most of the time, and he gladly agreed, but that strategy wasn't gonna work forever. You had to be honest with him. But at the same time, you knew what he was going to say and do, and the thought of him spending money on you, even if just by handling the restaurant bill, wasn't something you were much more comfortable with. Besides, it was only a matter of time before the "gold-digger" term starts to fly around in the small world that was the F1's.

You were laying on his couch, the Olympics playing on the TV but you were too busy overthinking the money thing to pay attention. Daniel was laying with his head on your lap, absently caressing your thigh and watching the TV. His phone went off and he moved to pick it up.

"Hello?" you watched as he answered the phone. "Hey mate, how's it going? Uh nothing, we're just chilling at home. Getting some rest... Yeah, I'm getting rested, you dirty-minded son of a bitch" you rolled your eyes while he laughed out loud on the line with someone. "Yeah, I know... the 19th is it? No, it's fine. Yeah, yeah. I'll be there. Alright, mate. Thanks for calling. Have a good one! Bye!" he hanged up and leaned in to peck you on the lips.

"Good news?" you asked him.

"Not really. Just wanted to kiss you" he shrugged, smiling. You smiled back and hugged him, pulling him in for another kiss. He was always so caring with you, always finding an excuse to kiss or touch you. You knew some people didn't like it, but you loved it. Physical touch was definitely one of your love languages.

"What's happening on the 19th then?" you asked him once you guys set apart from the kiss.

"Gotta be in London. Gonna run some testings and other boring race stuff..."

"Hum..." you hummed in understanding.

"You know what would make it less boring though?" he asked and you just looked at him, you already knew what he was going to ask you and it wasn't that you didn't want to spend every minute of the day with him, but you simply couldn't afford any more traveling, especially not in such short notice. "If you came with me. Huh? What do you say? A week in the Queen's land? Then we can fly together to Spa and after the race, I can go with you to Amsterdam. The next one it's the Dutch GP anyway, I'll just get there sooner" he laughed. It was crushing you, the man of your dreams was literally beaming at making plans with you, talking about spending the next few weeks glued together and you couldn't say yes.

"Dan, I have to work" you smiled sadly.

"Can't you work from distance? Or, I don't know, I mean... I know it's tiring, but you could come to London and fly home a bit early, then just meet me in Belgium?" great, his solution includes even more flying. And the thing is, you really didn't mind the flying. You always slept during the whole thing anyway, so you never got tired and the jetlag was minimal. You could work from distance, sure. Your boss wouldn't mind, as long as you got there eventually to check in on everything. But the whole logistics were just too expensive. There was no way you could afford it.

"I... sorry, I don't think I can" you said sadly and watched as his face dropped.

"That's fine, baby. I get it. I'm asking too much, all this traveling... don't worry about it" he tried to mask his emotions but you knew better. He knew you could in fact work from distance, so he was probably thinking the reason you couldn't do it was because you didn't want to.

He got up from the couch and walked into the kitchen. Meanwhile, you couldn't help but bury your face in your palms. This was so frustrating!

"You wanna go for a run or something? Maybe get something to eat?" he called from the kitchen, already moving on from the subject. You knew this whole thing was only gonna keep build up till he got tired of your excuses or you blowing up, probably the former, but you just keep going.

"Yeah, sure" you answered, getting up from the couch.

You and Daniel were both very active so going for a run, hiking, riding bikes, or whatever in the middle of the day was really routine for you. The Monaco summer weather was as beautiful as always and the sun was shining bright. You enjoyed the rest of your afternoon racing each other, kissing in the harbor, and just taking in the views, spending quality time together. Money wasn't even a thing in your bubble for a while.

"I'm getting hungry" he said on the way back home.

"Me too, and I'm super hot. I could go for a juice or something right now" you were all sweaty from the running, but you didn't care, he was too.

"You're always hot baby, I don't think juice gonna help with that" he grinned at you and you just rolled your eyes at him.

You passed by one of his favorite spots for food, nearby his place and he suggested getting some take-out, to which you agreed.

"Green juice, and a chicken wrap?" you tried to decide while the both of you waited in line.

"I'll never understand how you drink that"

"I've seen you drink that too, it's actually very refreshing"

"Because I'm forced to, I'm a high-performance athlete baby. But I'm on a break, so I'll have a coke, thank you very much" you laughed at him. He was holding your hand and tried to kiss you, wrapping his arm around you, you didn't dodge his kiss, you would never, but still laughed at the fact he wanted to kiss the sweaty mess you were right now.

"I'm gross, only you" you laughed.

"That's my baby, with no makeup she a ten" he rapped shrugging and grinning.

"Alright Lil Wayne, I know that one, don't even finish the verse" you laughed at him, making him laugh out loud, getting everyone's in the restaurant's attention.

"It's true, though"

"Sure..." You just shook your head smiling. Then you heard someone call his name.

"Hey! Daniel!" you both turned around to see Charles and Charlotte sitting in a corner, him waving at you two. You had met Charles a couple of times before but never spoke too much to him. They seemed to be leaving anyway, so they walked towards you guys, instead of towards the door.

"Hey mate, how's it going?" Daniel greeted him with a handshake. "Hey, Charlotte! You know (y/n) yet?"

"Hi! I don't think so, hi! How are you?" she greeted you smiling.

"Hi! Nice to meet you. Hi, Charles!" you said.

"Hey, (y/n). You're keeping him in line during the break? Char won't let me cheat my diet either" he laughed.

"Oh, that ship has sailed long ago! Daniel will just roll into the paddock if it's up to him" you laughed back.

"Hey! I think I've earned the right to some extra calories, we've been working out extra hard lately" Daniel said waving his eyebrows suggestively, making Charlotte giggle, Charles rolls his eyes and you go even redder than you were from the actual workout, while he just laughed out loud.

"I don't even want to know" Charles said. "Always great running into you mate" he was getting ready to say goodbye.

"Are we seeing you guys tomorrow?" Charlotte asked you.

"Tomorrow?" you asked her.

"Stefano's birthday" she said like it was obvious. Stefano Domenicali was the President and CEO of Formula 1, but you didn't know that yet - still, her tone made it seems like it was someone Daniel knew, so you just looked at him. He just rubbed his neck, looking a little embarrassed. "Oh, wait. Please tell me I didn't just said something I shouldn't" she looked at Charles.

"No, no. He invited me. Us, actually" Daniel reassured her. "I don't think we're going though, forgot to mention to you" he said looking at you.

"Uh mate, I wouldn't skip that if I were you. He didn't even invite all the drivers I heard" Charles said. "Maybe just stop by to say hello?"

"Stop by... a yacht... at the sea?" Charlotte said grinning at him. Daniel looked at you.

"You feel like going? It should be fun" he asked you.

"Sounds fancy... I mean, I don't mind if you go" you said.

"Common... I’m not going alone" he nudged you.

"I don't even have anything to wear, Dan" you told him.

"Oh! We can go shopping together!" Charlotte said and you had almost forgotten they were still there.

"Perfect!" Daniel answered for you. You could only imagine the types of stores she shopped.

"Tomorrow morning, then? Daniel can text your address to Charles for me? I'll pick you up!" she was being really nice about it.

"I thought you wanted to go today?" Charles said.

"That's when I thought I would have to go shopping with you, so I could use the extra time since you're the worst shopping partner ever!" she laughed at him.

"Burn!" Daniel laughed.

"His fashion taste is not the most reliable, let's face it" she laughed and kissed his cheek. "It's a date then (y/n)?" she looked expectantly at you. You didn't want to let her down, it was so hard to make friends with the girlfriends of other drivers, they were usually so... not nice. You could always just help her and find something to wear in your own stuff later.

"Yeah, sure! See you tomorrow, at 10?" you said simply.

"Perfect!" she beamed.

>>> end of part 1 <<<

#daniel ricciardo #daniel ricciardo fanfic #Daniel ricciardo fluff #daniel ricciardo x reader #daniel ricciardo imagine #daniel ricciardo fic #f1 fic #f1 fanfic

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babyboibucky · 3 years

Text

Deserve Better

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Reader

Summary: Bucky disappeared and came back only to say goodbye.

Word Count: 2,887

Warnings: angsty angsty angsty angsty angsty

A/N: Post-endgame timeline with lotsa angst! Included Andy Barber here because why the fuck not but he’s really not a major character lol

Deserve Better || Undeserving || Deserve The Best

MAIN MASTERLIST

The day you got Bucky back was the same day he said goodbye. He left you— said it was for the best— just as when your fingertips touched him for the first time after five years of longing.

Your reunion with Bucky after the snap was nothing like the movies, far from it actually. A lot of things happened when he was snapped back, in between the battle with Thanos and Tony’s funeral. Besides, you weren’t an Avenger; you didn’t work for SHIELD nor the CIA. In fact, you remained oblivious of the battle that was going on until the moment of chaos caused by the sudden reappearances of half of the world’s population.

And then you received a message from Steve, about the tragedy and the sacrifice of Tony Stark. He was inviting you to the funeral and as much as you felt devastated from the loss of a hero, you couldn’t help but focus your attention on the last line of Steve’s message.

Bucky’s going to be there too. He’s back. He needs you to be there with him.

It wasn’t until the funeral was over that you finally got to have Bucky all to yourself. You had locked gazes when you arrived and staring back into his beautiful blue eyes again made your knees weak.

Bucky was really back.

“Hi.” He greeted you first, his voice remained the same— soft and gentle.

One word was enough to make you feel the warmth of his existence. Hearing him, seeing him again felt like finally coming home after a very long, tiring day.

“Hi, Buck.” You whispered.

Bucky’s smile was all it took for the dam to finally break. You’d burst into tears right then and there and you were more than ready to feel his arms around you after years of hugging yourself to sleep during his absence.

But the warmth never came. If any, Bucky stopped himself from doing so. You frowned when he took a step back from you, extending his metal arm to keep you at a certain length away from him.

“I’m sorry.” He uttered, refusing to meet your gaze.

“What do you mean?”

“I have to go.” He explained, gently squeezing your arm before rubbing circles on your skin using his thumb.

You didn’t understand why Bucky needed to go when he just got back. You just got him back. You had spent years crying over his disappearance only for him to come back and disappear again?

Bucky explained that he thought he got better but things have become so vastly different after the snap that it left him feeling broken and different again. He told you about Steve’s decision to go back in time, never to return again. How Tony’s death made him feel like it was too late to set things straight and how he would probably carry the guilt and regret from not being able to apologize for what he had done.

“I’ll help you, Buck. We’ll work through this together. I want to be by your side when things get better.” You insisted, tears blurring your vision as you tried to reach for Bucky, wanting to feel him again after such a long time.

But Bucky kept on moving away from you, he kept on pushing you away and you wanted to understand why he wouldn’t let you touch him.

“I’ll only hurt you, I don’t want that to happen. I want to get better because you deserve better. But I can’t do that with you because this...this is something that I gotta figure out by myself.” He further explained.

You shook your head, unable to accept his decision. “Buck...I don’t think I can lose you again. I just got you back...I can’t afford to lose you again, please?”

When you attempted to reach for Bucky’s hand, he finally let you. You quickly entwined your fingers through his metal ones and savored how they felt against your skin. They were cold as usual, but Bucky always oozed a certain warmth that made you feel safe.

But now they’re just that— cold and hard.

“I love you. I’ll wait, Bucky.” You murmured and tugged at his hand before he could even let you go.

Bucky smiled sadly at you, “You don’t have to, doll.”

You shook your head and brought Bucky’s hand to your lips as you cried, “I want to. And I will.”

Pressing one final kiss on his hard knuckles, you watched Bucky slip his hand away from yours before turning around to leave. You felt your chest tighten as if you lost all the oxygen in your lungs the same way you lost Bucky.

Losing him the second time around proved to be even more painful. Because this time, he didn’t just disappear.

He walked away.

You waited for Bucky to come home to you for days and weeks until they turned into months...and then years. Still, no Bucky walked through your doorstep but you never stopped hoping.

Sleep was such a rare occurrence to you since Bucky walked away. How do you honestly cope with the loss of someone when you haven’t even healed yet from his first disappearance? You wanted to get mad at him, curse him for suddenly deciding to leave you. But you felt selfish for even thinking about that, because Bucky left to better himself.

To be better for you. He said so himself.

So you kept waiting for him to come back. You made it your reason to keep going. You looked forward to the day you’d hear your door open followed by his heavy foot steps. You wondered, would he smell the same then? Would he still be using your favorite perfume on him? One that smelled like cedar wood and mint and well, Bucky. Would his hair still be of the same length? What about his beard? Would he shave them off before coming back home?

How about his gaze? Would his blue ones still look at you as if you were his moon?

As much as these thoughts made you miss him more, they were the ones that you held onto. They were like your glimmer of hope on nights you were the loneliest, on nights you cried and dreamt of his return only to wake up to an empty, cold space beside you.

You held onto these thoughts every single day in hopes of them becoming real soon enough.

People have told you to move on, to not waste your time waiting for someone who walked away just like that. But you trusted Bucky when he said he wanted to be better because you deserved better. You couldn’t move on, not from Bucky.

You love him with your entire being, so much that his absence caused you physical pain too. You couldn’t even find the right words to describe how much you love Bucky.

In the three years that you spent waiting, you’d met a lot of people too. People who showed interest but none of them really won you over.

You’d met a man named Andy through work. He was a lawyer and was dealing with his own divorce. The connection was there and you wouldn’t deny that.

Two people dealing with the grief from losing someone they love, it wasn’t that hard not to find a common ground. And you did find some solace in Andy and him in you. But it was just that, nothing more and nothing less.

“How has it been?” You asked Andy after he had settled into the booth across of you.

The restaurant was surprisingly scarce on a Sunday morning. Usually there were plenty of customers, their chatters overpowering the soft music playing in the background. Now, it was peaceful and the radio was turned off. There were only the clinks of plates of being set on tables and the footsteps of the staff walking around the place as they attended to the few customers around.

It was serene and peaceful, pretty much like Andy’s aura when he arrived.

“I wouldn’t say I’m fine but I guess I’m at a much better place now than before.” He said with a nod, as if he was finally agreeing with himself after questioning his emotions for the past few months.

You offered a kind smile and placed a hand on top of his, “It shows, Andy. I’m glad. I’m happy for you.” You said.

He had been going through a lot of emotions since he signed the divorce papers. He didn’t want to but knew it was for the best. Andy had a son, Jacob, and he didn’t want for his son to grow up in an environment where his parents no longer slept on the same bed. As much as he loved Laurie, the relationship was no longer working and was becoming toxic the more they stayed together.

“And you?” Andy asked back before calling the waiter.

You let out a deep breath, “Still waiting.” You chuckled as your stared at your hand that remained on top of Andy’s.

Andy spared you an apologetic glance but nodded, “I do hope he knows how lucky he is.” He said, turning his palm up so he could hold your hand.

To others, the gesture may seem romantic but it really wasn’t. You and Andy both knew that despite the similarities and the comfort you found in each other, the both of you were not meant to be together in that way.

Your heart still belonged to Bucky after all.

When you received an invitation from Sam Wilson, you felt confused and excited. There was going to be a huge gala at the compound to honor Steve Rogers’ legacy as Captain America.

You’d heard the news about Steve’s passing not long after he went back in time. He finally got to live the life he deserved and when he came back, it was as if everything had been corrected. He may no longer be the super soldier that many knew but he remained the same person— but he wasn’t the man out of time anymore. Despite his white hair and wrinkles, Steve looked the happiest he had ever been.

You wondered how Bucky coped up with such a huge loss, you always worried for him.

It sparked debate though, Steve’s decision to leave the Avengers. Some got angry, said that Steve was selfish for doing that. Others showed sympathy, that Steve didn’t owe the world anything. He’d spent a lifetime fighting for everyone. It was time that he fought for himself and what he deserved. And Sam fought just as hard for Steve’s legacy and finally, all his hard work finally paid off.

What confused you was whether Bucky was going to be there? Does he know about the gala? Was he finally back? If he was, why hasn’t he come home to you yet? You had so many questions that you wanted to ask.

The answers though, were literally in the palm of your hand— the invitation.

It was no surprise how big the gala was. Just on your way inside, you’d already come across a lot of big personalities. There were politicians and popular celebrities too. You felt intimidated given that you went by yourself and that you weren’t really part of their world.

You were just you, someone who had fallen in love with one Bucky Barnes who introduced you to the world of superheroes. The rest was history.

“I’m so glad you’re here!” You turned around and found Sam approaching you with a huge smile.

You embraced him and smiled as you pulled away, “I wouldn’t miss this for the world.” You told him.

It was Steve and Sam that you’d met first and they were nothing but kind to you. Despite being well, ordinary, they welcomed you like their own when Bucky had introduced you.

Sam’s expression changed at your response, “I honestly thought that you wouldn’t show up after Bucky said—“

“Bucky?” You immediately cut him off upon hearing his name.

“Bucky’s back?” You asked and Sam had never looked more confused as ever.

He carefully nodded, brows knitting together as he frantically looked around. “I thought you knew about it.”

“How long? How long has it been since he came back, Sam?” You probed, feeling your throat constricting at the unexpected revelation.

Sam merely looked at you with what seemed to be pity. Why? Why was he looking at you like he was sorry? And why didn’t Bucky tell you when he came back? Was he simply not ready? Or was he waiting for the right time?

“Sam, how long?” You asked again, voice firmer this time around.

“A year ago. He decided to join the Avengers but wanted to undergo formal training before taking on the responsibility of one.” He responded.

You opened your mouth to say something but it’s as if your whole body was paralyzed. He had been back for an entire year now...and yet he kept you waiting?

A hand on your arm pulled you back to the surface, looking up at Sam you shook your head in utter confusion.

“I don’t understand why he didn’t tell me.”

Sam sighed, “I thought you knew. He said he saw you and—“

Sam’s words died on his tongue when he saw that your attention was no longer on him. Following the line of your sight, Sam turned around and saw that Bucky had walked into the venue. He swallowed and couldn’t hide the guilt he felt from assuming that you knew about his return. Before he could apologize, you’d brushed past him as you kept your gaze on Bucky.

Why he didn’t inform you of his return was beyond you and to be honest, you couldn’t bring yourself to care about it for now. Because Bucky was right in front of you and it felt like forever since you last saw him.

A lot has changed. He chopped off his hair but he still sported some scruff. Bucky looked closer to his younger self back in the 40’s. You remembered the conversation you had with him about cutting his hair.

“Should I cut it?” Bucky stood in your bathroom, observing his long locks in the mirror as he ran his fingers through them.

You walked over to him, hugging him from behind and pressing your lips on his back before moving to stand beside him.

“Do you want to?” you asked.

Bucky scrunched his nose, “Maybe in the future. I do miss my hair back then.” he smiled.

You chuckled, “Back when Sergeant James Buchanan Barnes used to sweep the ladies off of their feet?” you teased.

Bucky turned to you and wrapped an arm around your wait pulling you closer to kiss your lips, “Hmm, I wanna see if that hair will have the same effect on you.” he said and kissed your cheek.

You hummed as you caressed his face with your delicate hands, “I’d like to see that too, but maybe you should keep the scruff.”

But it wasn’t just his hair that changed. It was his entire demeanor— his aura seemed a lot lighter now, he seemed happier and confident. You knew it for a fact because he wasn’t wearing a glove to hide his metal hand. It was out on display for everyone to see and shake, apparently.

You watched in awe as Bucky interacted with the people around him. He used to avoid eye contact with strangers but now he seemed relaxed doing so. Although he would still open and close his metal hand, something he did whenever he was anxious. The crowd still made him uncomfortable but he’s shown a lot of improvement since then.

The question as to why he never told you about his return continued to linger in the back of your head. But you couldn’t stop yourself from smiling from ear to ear, eyes brimming with tears as you quickened your steps.

Your Bucky was finally back.

And then the world seemed to have stopped when a certain blonde walked over to Bucky, her hand sliding over to his cheek as she leaned up to press a quick peck on his lips.

You knew her of course, Sharon Carter; and you knew about her and Steve. It was Bucky himself who told you about them and how proud he was that Steve finally decided to try his luck at romance. Which is why you felt even more appalled at the scene playing before you.

The way Bucky slid an arm around her waist, pulling her closer to him and how he tucked a strand of her hair behind her ear. How he was smiling down at her, whispering to her ear as they laughed.

Bucky was in love with Sharon. You didn’t have to ask him that anymore because he was looking at her like she was his moon, his source of light in the darkness.

You knew that because he looked at you the same way, back when you still had his heart.

Suddenly, the questions plaguing your mind found their answers. You understood now why he never came home to you.

He did get better, you could tell that by the way he smiled and laughed.

Bucky was better now, but not for you. At least, not anymore.

Everything Bucky Tag List:

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#bbbwrites #oneshots: bucky barnes #bucky barnes #bucky barnes fic #bucky barnes angst #bucky barnes x you #bucky barnes x reader #bucky #bucky fic #bucky angst #bucky x you #bucky x reader #sebastian stan

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tyongxnct · 3 years

Text

𝘗𝘪𝘭𝘭𝘰𝘸 - 𝘛𝘦𝘯

pairing: Ten x reader

summary: Your best friend finally became your boyfriend, but not longer after that, he got a once in a lifetime opportunity. Ten didn’t know If he should take the offer, you only started dating recently but you would never hold him back. Going to a dance school in New York City? You know how much Ten loves dancing and you also know that you could make this work. But after a couple months, your relationship was slowly falling apart.

song: Pillow - Bebe Rexha

genre: bestfriends-to-lovers!au, long-distance!au, angst, smut, fluff

warnings: smut (that’s it i guess)

word count: 5.6k

A/N: I’ll probably take a song fic break after this one! I hope you enjoy this!! have fun reading :)

taglist: @aesthetichrj, @bitchenderyy, @bvbyxuxi, @chitaphrrrr

this is fiction!

I just wanna kiss your face I just wanna feel your gaze I just wanna, I just wanna I just wanna be where you are I just wanna feel your touch I'm not asking for too much I just wanna, I just wanna I just wanna wake up where you are

You missed the way he kissed you. You missed the way he looked at you with so much adoration, you missed his touch on your skin.

You missed him, you missed Ten.

“I miss you.” You whispered, half asleep. You were facetiming Ten and it’s been almost two months since he left.

“I miss you more.” Ten smiled as he watched you slowly fall asleep.

“That’s not possible.”

Ten looked at you with those eyes again.

“What?”

“Nothing. You’re just so pretty.”

“Shut up.” You said shyly.

“But it’s the truth.”

“I love you.”

“I love you more.” And then you fell asleep. That was your routine. Facetime with Ten until you fell asleep.

Yes, you missed him and you would prefer to sleep next to him, but Ten was living his dream and his happiness was your happiness.

I used to think that love was just so easy But I couldn't be less right Yeah I finally found someone perfect, just for me Gotta fly thousands of miles, yeah

four months ago

“Why? Please tell me, why is it so hard to find the perfect guy? Is there not a single guy who’s interested in me? Am I going to die alone? Am I too ugly to be loved?” you cried out.

Ten sighed. He wanted to tell you so bad that you were the prettiest girl in the entire world and that he would love you forever, but he was just you’re best friend. You didn’t like him like that. Right?

“No you’re not, now shut up and focus on new girl.”

“Is it too much I’m asking for? I just want someone to love me. Like really love me. Am I not loveable?” you asked him.

You looked at the screen and watched Nick and Jess share their first (and absolutely amazing and passionate) kiss.

“I want what they have! Look at the way he kisses her! I want that, I need that!”

After watching a couple more episodes of new girl, Ten decided to go home. He wanted to kiss you so bad, he imagined it the whole time instead of focusing on new girl. “You can stay the night if you want to.” You told him.

“Nah, I should go home. Lucas texted me and asked me to take Bella out since he’s busy with whatever her name was.”

“Fine. Text me when you get home.” You hugged your best friend goodbye before he left and he hugged you back, a little longer than normal. You were standing in front of the door and just hugged each other.

A couple minutes later he left and you missed his touch.

With a sad sigh you closed the door and went to the kitchen. You wanted to drink something, but suddenly the doorbell rang.

“Did you forget-“

You opened the door and saw Ten standing there and before you could finish your question, Ten pressed his lips on yours to shut you up. You didn’t move at first, your head was spinning, you weren’t sure if it was the alcohol or just the fact that Ten, you’re best friend who you secretly loved more than anything else on this planet, kissed you with so much passion.

You pulled him closer as you put your arms around his neck. You were kissing him back and you accidently let out a moan when he put his tongue inside your mouth. You were never, ever kissed like this.

He softly pulled away to let you breathe again. Ten licked over his lips and stepped back.

“You’re the prettiest girl I’ve ever seen. You’re absolutely beautiful and I couldn’t stop myself from kissing you. I-I’m sorry If I just destroyed our friendship, but I need you to know how I feel about you. I don’t want you to date random men, I don’t want you to think that you are not enough, because fuck, you are. You are perfect and I want to love you like you deserved to be loved. If you let me.”

You looked at him with teary eyes. Ten, your best friend who you were crushing on for years, your best friend who helped you find cute outfits for your dates, even though he hated every second of you looking cute for another guy, your best friend who just confessed to you.

“I love you.” You blurred out.

Ten’s eyes widened.

“Shit, did I say it too soon?” you looked down to your feet.

“Fuck I love you too.” And without hesitation he pulled you closer to kiss you again, “I love you so much.” He said in between kisses.

That’s how your relationship started. He stayed the night and told Lucas to take care of Bella himself. He wanted to spend some time with his best- no, his girlfriend.

You were dating for three months now, and you can’t remember a time you were happier. You loved to go on dates with Ten, but you also loved the nights you had just dance battles at home. Ten always won, he was a dancer after all. Dancing was his passion, he loved it and he was the greatest dancer you’ve ever seen and when he told you about the school he wanted to apply to, you encouraged him to do it. One day, he got an email, but he was too scared to read it so he rushed over to your apartment.

“It’s going to be fine.” You assured him.

“C-Can you read it? Please?”

You smiled softly, “Sure.”

You opened the email and read it out loud, “Dear Chittaphon Leechaiyapornkul, I would like to congratulate you for winning a scholarship in our school-“

“Oh my god I’m in?” he couldn’t believe it.

“You are in! I knew you would make it!” you hugged him tightly and he hugged you back even tighter after he realized that he had to leave you.

“I can’t believe this.” He mumbled into your neck.

“I can! You deserve this so much, I’m so proud of you Ten.” You pressed a kiss on his shoulder before you pulled back to look him in the eyes. “I love you.”

“I love you too. So much.” He said sadly.

“What’s wrong. Why are you not smiling and dancing?” you smiled softly.

“I-It’s in New York. I don’t want to leave you, maybe I should refuse-” He said unsure but you interrupted him.

“Don’t you dare finish that sentence. Ten, Baby, I love you and I promise you that everything is going to be fine. You worked so hard, this is a once in a lifetime opportunity, I’ll love you no matter where you are. We can make this work.”

You tried to stop yourself from crying so bad, you bit your lip almost too painfully.

“You are right. We’ll make this work. Thank you for believing in me.” He kissed every inch of your face, “You are the best girlfriend in this entire world. I love you so much.”

It took you so long to finally be with Ten and now you had a long-distance relationship. But your love was so strong, you could make this work. You promised each other to make this work.

I'll be alright, just one more night I'll be just fine, holdin' my pillow Pretending it's you though I'll be alright, just one more night I'll be just fine, holdin' my pillow Pretending it's you though

Babe 03:23: Sorry baby, we practiced a little longer than usual. You’re probably sleeping right now, sweet dreams. I love you and I’ll call you tomorrow. I promise.

You were actually still awake, you couldn’t fall asleep. You were worried and you missed him so much that you had to wait for an answer.

You threw the pillow you were hugging against the wall and sat up. You took your phone in your hand and smiled brightly as you called him on facetime. It’s been two minutes since he called, why did it take him so long to answer? You called him again and when he didn’t answer you texted him a simple good night and I love you.

You grabbed your pillow again and hugged it tightly. You tried to stop yourself from crying, but it was so hard. It’s been 7 months since Ten left, and the first couple months of your long-distance relationship was easy, you talked every day and texted often too, you would facetime before you would go to sleep and he would send you random pictures and videos of New York and his dance school so you would know about his lifestyle there.

But now he’s been pretty busy and you would talk maybe three times a week if he had time. He would answer your texts when you were asleep or not at all. Sometimes you were worried that he was overworking himself, but he assured you that everything was chill and easy. So why was he acting so distant?

Maybe tomorrow will be a better day, you told yourself as you tried to fall asleep. You would try to call him tomorrow and tell him that you were sad and that you missed him. Communication is the key after all, but for now, you’d cry into your pillow and imagine it was Ten you were hugging.

I need a minute to breathe you in Just a second to taste your skin I just gotta, I just gotta Feel you here right next to me Can we please just go back in time Those lazy Sundays, you and I 'Cause every hour and every day Is more painful when you're away

It was the last night before Ten would leave for New York. You spend the last month everyday together, it was almost like he moved in with you, but you pushed back that thought to stop your heart from hurting.

“Is it tasty?” you asked him.

You had ordered some Pizza and he asked you if you wanted a piece. You refused at first but now you wanted some and he laughed at your cute acting and gave you his last two pieces. “No it’s too much.” You giggled. “Just eat it, we both know that you could finish another box of Pizza baby.”

“Well, that’s true.”

He put his head on your lap while you were eating the last piece of Pizza. “You look so hot from here eating that Pizza. Tomato sauce on your lips, wow, baby, I get hard just looking at you from here.” He joked and you slapped him softly.

“Don’t make fun of me or you can sleep on the floor.”

Ten pouted, “You wouldn’t do that.”

You spent the next hours just laying lazily on your couch and cuddling. You would miss nights like these the most, just being with him and talking about everything that came to your minds. You loved it and you loved him.

You didn’t notice him crawl between your legs as you laid against the armrest. “What do you think? Should we take this off?” he pulled on your shirt.

“Maybe we should.” You smirked, “And maybe you should take your shirt off too.”

And he did. He took off his shirt first before he slowly, teasingly took off yours. You were just wearing a shirt and panties and now you were almost completely naked under him. “You’re so hot.” You heard him say before he started kissing your boobs. His hand softly caressed your pussy over your panties.

Your nipples hardened instantly, your head fell back and you just enjoyed his tongue on your breasts. “It feels so good.” You moaned.

After giving enough attention to your other nipple, Ten stood up and carried you to your bedroom. “It’s going to be a long night.” He smirked at you.

After softly placing you on the bed, Ten pulled down your panties and kissed your inner thighs. He kissed his was to your already wet pussy and kissed it softly. You felt his tongue against your clit and you closed your eyes. He licked you so good and sucked on your clit, you were so close.

“Fuck, baby, It feels so fucking good.”

Ten fastened his pace and a couple seconds later you reached your first orgasm.

“Number one, more to go.” He said, his chin glistening with your arousal and turning you on.

You felt his fingers on your entrance and a second later he thrusted his fingers inside of you. His lips were on your nipples again and you gripped the sheets, his fingers slid in easily, you were so wet. “Fuck.” You could feel your second orgasm coming. “Tell me baby, what do you want?”

“I want to cum again- please Ten make me cum again.” You cried out.

You felt him go faster and when he hit that one spot, you reached your second orgasm. Ten put his fingers against your lips, “Suck.” He demanded and you sucked his fingers clean. “Good girl.”

“I want to suck you off- please Ten let me suck you off.” You begged him.

“Okay baby, show me how good you can take me inside of your mouth.” He pulled down his sweatpants and his boxers briefs and sat down on the edge of your bed. You got off the bed and got on your knees right in front of his hard cock.

You spat on your hand and wrapped your fingers around his shaft and started pumping slowly, “Don’t tease baby, or you’ll regret it.” He warned you.

You fastened your pace and started licking his tip. You licked on the slit, and slowly put his cock inside of your mouth. It’s not your first time sucking his cock, you knew what you had to do to make him feel good.

“Yeah just like that, feels so good baby.” He caressed your hair softly as you took him all the way down. His cock hit the back of your throat but you didn’t mind, you liked it actually and Ten loved it. “Fuck yes yes, just like that, love it so much.” He moaned out, you felt him twitch inside of your mouth.

You sucked his cock and softly played with his balls, you looked up and saw that he closed his eyes and bit his lip, eyebrows furrowed and face sweaty. You let out a moan after seeing him like that and the vibrations of your voice felt so good, he came. “Fuck, yes baby take it all and swallow.”

You did as he said, “Open up and show me.”

You opened your mouth and sticked your tongue out. “Good girl. Now baby, I want you to fucking ride me, okay baby?”

You nodded eagerly.

You sat down on his cock slowly and started riding him. It felt so good, you grabbed his shoulders to go faster. “T-Ten, I love your cock so much.” You cried out. Ten cupped your boobs and flicked your nipples, and you loved it when he played with your nipples. Ten wrapped his arm around your waist and pulled you down so he could suck on your nipples. While he did that, he fucked up into you, meeting your hips. The sounds of your skin slapping against each other was like music to your ears.

“So fucking tight, didn’t I fuck this pussy enough?” you clenched at his words.

You felt your legs arching and you felt like you were collapse on top of him, “T-Ten I can’t p-please take over.” And he did.

Within a second he turned your around and took you from behind. You were on all fours as he stared ramming his cock inside of you. His hand found your clit and he started rubbing and circling it with his fingers. “Gonna cum baby? Hm? Cum all over my cock?”

“Y-Yes, fuck, feel so good. I’m so fucking close.”

You clenched once again and encouraged Ten to go even faster and harder with his thrusts. “I’m gonna fill you up, you’re going to take all of my cum, okay baby?”

“Yes please, cum in me.”

And with the next thrust, you came. You moaned as you clenched and rode out your third orgasm, you were so sensitive but it still felt good. You clenched around him once again and Ten came and painted your walls white.

“Fuck fuck fuck.” He moaned as he slowed down and pulled his cock out of you. He watched his cum mixed with yours drip out of you. “So fucking hot.” He got hard again.

That night, you had so many orgasms. His hands, his mouth and his cock bought you to heaven. He fucked you hard and fast but also slow and full of passion.

I used to think that love was just so easy But I couldn't be less right, yeah

“I’ll miss you so much.” You told him that night before he left.

“I’ll miss you too, but we’ll make this work. I trust in us. We’ll talk every day and text and I’ll come visit you and you’ll come visit me too.” Ten said convinced that long-distance was going to work.

“I love you so much, never forget that okay.”

It could work. You could make this work. You were absolutely sure that you and Ten could make a long-distance relationship work. He was your best friend before you started dating, he would never hurt you and you would never hurt him and you trust him with your life.

It’s been almost two weeks since you last facetimed Ten. Yeah, you texted once in a while but it’s been so long since you talked and just be there for each other. You talked to him a month ago about feeling lonely and missing him and he promised you to make more time for you, but the last two weeks you barely talked.

You didn’t want to be clingy and suffocate him, so you waited for him to text you first. But every passing minute broke your heart more and more. You knew that he found new friends, but you would never doubt his faithfulness.

You closed your eyes and hugged your pillow tightly. Every night, you pretended that it was Ten you were hugging and not just your pillow. You missed his touch so much, you missed to kiss him and just hug him. You couldn’t take it anymore, you had to hear his voice. It was past midnight in New York but you didn’t care a t that moment.

“Yes?” you heard him yell. At least he answered.

“Ten? Can you hear me?” The other line was so loud, you raised your voice a little.

“What is it Y/n?! I’m busy!” you could hear loud music and people laughing around. “Busy? What are you doing?” it didn’t sound like he was busy.

“I’m out with some friends, look, I told you I’ll call you. Can’t you let me breathe for one day?” he said. Ten sounded annoyed and you could imagine how he rolled his eyes.

“It’s been two weeks since you said you’ll call! I let you breathe, but I was so worried, I just wanted to hear you voice-“

“You heard my voice, can I hang up now?”

You gasped, he sounded so cold, so annoyed and even distracted and before he could, you hung up.

You fell asleep crying. Once again.

Ten never apologized for that night and you never bought it up. It’s like talking to a wall. It took him a couple days to call you and he acted like that night never happened, like he never talked like he had enough of you.

The worst thing was yet to come.

Your one-year anniversary.

You reminded him one day before, that you would facetime, eat something together, watch a movie and just spend time together.

You waited and waited, but he never called.

You called him four times, texted him ten times, but he never answered and when you checked his Instagram story, you weren’t even surprised.

Ten was partying again. Ten ditched you to party on your one-year anniversary.

You realized that you were holding onto something that was long gone. It was over. It should be over. You were done with him, you were heartbroken and you regretted every decision you made. Maybe you should’ve stayed friends, maybe you would be happier and not suffering.

And I can't lie, babe, I'm losing my patience Too much waiting for you Every time that I wake up My hands go where I'm waiting for you I know I say that I'm fine But I'm losing my mind Just need to hold you Don't take your time Oh, baby

The next day, you had fifteen missed calls from Ten, but you decided to ignore him for a while and sort your thoughts. He texted you every day, apologizing and asking for forgiveness. Ten told you about his day even though you never texted back. You hated to be like this, but you needed space. You called him one week later and he answered immediately.

“H-Hi.” Ten whispered nervously.

“Hey.” You mumbled.

“How… how have you been?” Ten wanted to punch himself. How could he ask you that? He knew that you were feeling sad.

“Okay I guess.” You tried to hold back you tears.

“Look about-“

“I can’t do this anymore.” You just said it. You’ve been thinking about it for the past months actually, but you never thought you would get to this point. You never thought you would want to break up.

“W-What? N-no, no no no please Y/n. Look I’m sorry, I’m s-so sorry that I missed our anniversary, but please don’t do this-“

“It’s not just the anniversary! Everything is too much for me. You ignore me and you yell at me for caring and being worried a-and you ditched me so many times and o-our anniversary- you, fuck, you were out having fun while I was waiting for you! You tell me that you’re going to call, but you never do and when I call you because I miss you, you yell at me and call me annoying!”

You didn’t want to cry, but it was so hard not to.

“I-I’m sorry. I am really so fucking sorry. Y-You didn’t deserve all that, I fucked up. I promised to be there for you b-but-“ he stopped. You could hear him sniff and try to hold back his tears. Ten rarely cried, like, you saw him cry maybe one time.

“But?”

“But I was so overwhelmed with this city and with this school and dancing. I can’t lose you. You’re my everything. I’ll change! I’ll be a better boyfriend, but please, don’t leave me.” He cried out.

“I-It’s not that easy. Y-You broke my heart. I trusted in us, b-but maybe we aren’t meant to be.”

“No, no. No, don’t say that- you know that’s not true, you know that I love you more than anything. You are the most important person in my life.”

“Seems like I’m not as important as you think I am. I don’t want to be the reason you stop focusing on what’s important and that’s your dance school. That’s New York and m-my feelings are important too. I… I can’t remember the last time I was genuinely happy. I’m sorry, Ten. I’m really sorry.”

And before he could start talking again, you hung up. You broke out in tears, you clutched your heart and tried to keep it from exploding, but you felt the little piece stab your insides. Ten wasn’t doing any better. He cried and cried and regretted all of his choices, he regretted leaving you and moving to New York. He regretted ignoring you, he regretted leaving you on read. He regretted everything. Oh, how he wished he could turn back time and be a better boyfriend. A boyfriend you deserve, someone who makes you feel loved and not someone who hurts you.

It’s been a couple days since you talked to Ten. You had blocked him everywhere and you tried to ignore the pain in your heart. It was harder to break up and block him, but it was the only way to stop your suffering. You couldn’t let him treat you like that forever.

You couldn’t focus on anything. It was almost like he followed you everywhere. One day your mother send you pictures of prom and Ten was your date. You went as friends but you just realized that he looked at you with so much love in his eyes. His arm was around your waist and you looked at each other and smiled brightly. Then, you wanted to watch some Netflix and Netflix recommended you Step up. A movie about dancing. How ironic. Even the number Ten made you so sad and emotional.

Almost a week later, you got ready for bed. You were brushing your teeth when you heard the doorbell. Who could it be at this hour? You tiptoed and looked through the spy. Your jaw dropped when you saw his face.

“I can hear you breathing. Please open the door, I want to see your face. I missed you so much.”

You slowly opened the door and looked at him with teary eyes, he was about to step closer but he stood still, his body froze and his heart hurt. You weren’t doing any better. It’s been a year since you saw his pretty face and now he was standing right in front of you. You wanted to hug him, kiss him, just pull him closer and never let go again, but you were also frozen.

“I-I can’t be without you. Tell me to stay and I will.” He said and he looked absolutely serious.

You pulled him closer and hugged him as tightly as you could. Ten wrapped his arms around you pressed kisses on your hair. “I’ll do it, I’ll leave New York and come back to you. I just need you. I love you so much, Y/n.”

You sobbed and cried and it was so hard to breathe but you couldn’t stop yourself from crying harder. “I love you too, but I don’t want you to do t-that. I don’t want you to stop living your dream. I love you so much, but I won’t let you do that.”

“B-But I don’t want to lose you.” Ten whispered and caressed your hair softly. “Please forgive me, please. I was dumb, so fucking dumb. I didn’t realize how I treated you. I didn’t see that you were hurting and I promise you I’ll be better, I can’t lose you ever again. Please give me a second chance to make this right.”

You nodded and it felt so unreal to hold him in your arms. You waited for this moment for so long and he was finally in your arms. Seeing him helped you realize that you couldn’t be without him, that you needed your best friend, the love of your life.

“I love you so much.”

“I love you.”

You were cuddling under the blankets as Ten softly played with your hair, your head was on his chest. He also left kisses on your forehead, on your nose, on your lips, on every inch of your face and hands. Your hands were locked and he would never let go again.

“How did you even come? Don’t you have any classes to attend?” you asked him as you pecked his lips.

“I’ll just skip a few days, I won’t miss anything. Don’t worry about that.” He smiled softly.

Ten started drawing circles on your soft skin and you did the same on his chest. You looked up at him and pressed your lips on his, not just a simple peck. A kiss with so much longing and passion. A kiss to show him how much you missed him.

His hand slowly travelled to your waist and then to your ass. He squeezed it softly and pulled you on top of him, not breaking the kiss.

You moved your hips and his hands caressed the skin under your shirt. You broke the kiss for a second to get rid of your shirt. You weren’t wearing anything under your shirt and Ten cupped your breast with one hand and cupped your cheek with the other to kiss you again. He pinched your nipple and you let out a moan.

You could feel him slowly hardening and your hand found his belt. You unbuttoned his jeans and grabbed his shirt to take it off. You placed wet kisses on his chest and next thing you knew, you were under him.

Ten sucked on your boobs and pinched your nipples while he was busy pulling down your sweatpants and underwear. You were completely naked under him now and he kissed his way to your pussy. He parted your legs with his hands and you wanted to close them again, you were shy but then you remembered that this was Ten and you parted your legs even wider.

Ten softly kissed your pussy and then he ate you out like a starving man. He sucked on your clit and when he inserted two fingers inside of your wet cunt, you lost it. You tried to hide your moans but you couldn’t, your grip around the sheets tightened and you could see the stars, you can’t even remember the last time you had an orgasm, that’s why you came embarrassingly fast. You couldn’t hold back and came all over his fingers. “I’m cuming, fuck, feels so good.”

Ten didn’t stop playing with your clit, even after you came and you were so sensitive, you almost came again but he stopped and crawled back up to kiss you. “I love you.” He mumbled before he pulled his boxers down.

“I love you- so much.”

He was rock hard already and ready to be inside of you. He didn’t need you to suck him off, he just needed to be inside of you.

“I missed fucking you, I missed your tight little cunt so much.” And before you could answer that you missed him fucking you too, he rammed his cock inside of you. You moaned so loud, you hoped the neighbors wouldn’t hear you, but you wouldn’t hold back- you were feeling way too good to shut up.

“Fuck me, fuck me please.”

And he did.

Ten fucked you hard and fast, he gripped your hips tightly and fucked you deep, hitting the right spot and making you lose your mind. You clenched around him and he could feel himself getting closer. He looked you deep in the eyes and your boobs bounced up every time he moved his hips. He loved how fucked out you looked, so pretty and innocent.

“L-Let me ride you, please-“ you moaned out and who was he to refuse? He loved seeing you on top him.

You were riding him now, he gripped your hands again to thrust up. He couldn’t take away his eyes from your boobs or your face. You threw your head back, you felt your second orgasm nearing and feeling his hands on your boob, pinching your nipples turned you even more on.

“I’m gonna cum, gonna cum-“ and you came and Ten couldn’t hold back and he shot his cum inside of you. “Fuck, you feel so fucking good.”

You moved your hips to ride out your orgasms and you collapsed on top of him. Ten pulled his cock out of your cunt and then he got up to bring a warm towel to clean you up. After he was done cleaning you up, he got into bed and pulled you up to his chest. You were naked under the covers but you didn’t mind, his body was warm and cozy.

“I love you.” He placed a kiss on your temple.

“I love you too.” And you fell asleep in the arms of the love of your life.

Your relationship was even stronger than before. After Ten left for New York again, you were scared that it wouldn’t work out, but it did. He was always there for you and you were always there for him. You visited him on Valentine’s day and he visited you on your birthday. Your love grew and before you could realize that you’ve been dating for three years, you were packing your stuff to move out of your apartment.

Yes, you were moving to New York, to your boyfriend and you’ve been thinking about this for months now and it was the best decision you’ve ever made. You’re living with your best friend, who became your boyfriend, in New York City.

Baby (14:24): SPOTTED! The love of my life in Starbucks, with an iced coffee in her hand. Who is she waiting for? Perhaps her boyfriend? Stay tuned. XOXO gossip girl.

You laughed out loud in Starbucks as you read the text Ten just sent you. You laughed a little too loud, a couple looked at you and you apologized for laughing so loud.

Ten entered Starbucks and kissed you on the lips. “Babe, gossip girl? Really?” you giggled and wrapped your arms around him. “You know you love me.”

And that was the truth. “You’re right.”

378 notes · View notes

kanene-yaaay · 3 years

Text

Full of Life

Random Notes: This fanfic contains Cheer Up Tickles, Mouth Tickles, Rapberries, Tickly Kisses, Gang Up Tickles, Nice Nicknames, Light Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Fluff and the power of friendship. This fic is about 3.000 words. This fic is Lee!Patton with Ler!Logan and Ler!Roman with also implied Lee!Logan. Virgil is mentioned. I did not prrofreaded this yet :’v.

Kanene’s Notes: Heya!! Holy gosh, I started this fic with a very clear direction in mind and then proceeded to ignore it xDD. Gosh, I literally forgot how natural writing can feel. I hope you have as fun reading this as I did writing it. <3

[~*~]

Patton was not sure how Logan knew about the Blanket Rule, but he did. Maybe they talked about this one day.

About how, when Patton opened Logan's door and immediately went to hide under the grey comforter of his friend's room, that meant he didn't want any kind of contact. No touches. No words. No acknowledgment.

And Logan respected that. He was just so good like that.

Actually, in Patton's opinion, Logan was amazingly good at a handful of things, but especially in dealing with sad days.

They didn't expect sad days to go as smoothly as they did in each others' company, but now that they lived through tough and hard moments, it really couldn't go any other way.

Logan, for his part, didn't know how to comfort and preferred the silence instead of the possibility of saying the wrong thing and upsetting the person further, obligating him to deal with things he hardly understood, such as feelings. And, in Patton's turn, he would rather cry and let himself feel all the bad emotions far away from any judgmental eyes or unsolicited advices.

Now, Patton wasn't really sure what he had to offer on Logan's Bad Days, but the other confirmed that he helped with such certainty and unavoidable security that it left no other options than trusting on his words.

Patton trusted him. A lot.

The cat lover mused this sentence on his brain, trying to focus better on his senses than the overwhelming thoughts that fought desperately for his attention. It was also good that Logan's house wasn't the quietest, too. Above the heat that started to bring his mind to the present and to the now, Patton could hear the sound of Roman in the kitchen, talking fiercely on the phone, hitting by accident - between curses and 'Who the hell put this here?' - cabinets, pans and bouncy containers.

He chuckled. It was a low sound, barely there.

But still.

There was also the quiet sound of Logan moving the books and cups from his table, turning on his computer and typing.

Also, there were cars passing outside. Cars filled with people and sometimes even pets. There were purring cats and lazy dogs and families out there. Stars and fireflies and kids laughing because their parents finally gave in and bought them ice cream before dinner. There was the wind ruffling someone else's hair, a parrot learning new words and an old couple enjoying a cup of coffee on a low night who could, as well, be found outside.

There was so much life outside.

His hand touched his chest and Patton felt his heartbeats and the way his torso would go up and down at every breath. The way the comforter squished under his fingers in a feeling of soft and secure and...

There was life inside too.

There was a vivid life in the way Logan put one of their favorite movies, letting the opening to fly unashamed across the room in a silent invitation.

There was life in the way Patton knew that, the moment he opened the door, the smell of baked goodies would fill his senses and his heart.

And in the way the stars kept their light and the planets their rotation and meteors continued to fly around that gigantic amount of things we call the Universe, as if nothing else really mattered.

And...

And maybe that was true.

Maybe, while the stars were in the sky, the cats continued to purr, a child kept bothering their parents for a snack and best friends kept caring about you during your bad days...

Maybe then nothing else mattered.

Patton pushed the blanket away from him, taking a deep breath.

It was much less stuffy outside.

"Logan." The other turned in his direction immediately, fondly scoffing when he found the other making grabby hands in his direction. A couple of seconds later his hoodie was flying across the room and falling from Patton's awaiting arms, since his skill of catching things was still a work in progress.

After a few seconds and a couple more, Patton found himself melting on his friend's half hug, watching the movie - which had to be played again from the beginning, since when Patton arrived it was already in the middle of the plot’s clímax, but neither commented on it - and barely jumping on the bean bag when Roman opened the door with no discretion.

"If that is a sad movie that I hear I will slay you all. Except for you, Patty Cake, I will fight for you." He came in, phone still pressed between his shoulder and ear, his hands too occupied in not letting the bows full of cookies, popcorn, chocolate and a lonely pot of ice cream to fall. He lightly hit Patton's thigh with his foot. "Move, I'm gay."

"Hi gay, I’m Patton." He chuckled, that time it sounded a bit stronger.

"We are not eating this absurd amount of sugar." Logan replied, profusely ignoring Patton's pun.

"Thank you for your input, Microsoft Nerd." Roman answered with a joyful, fake tune, totally unfazed by Logan's half not-amused and half but-also-not-surprised stare. "If you have any complaints in regards to the attendant's service we ask for you to fill a complaint form that will be carefully read by our team, who will do their best to apply the necessary changes in a near future. Roman's company-" a loud gasp cut his words when Logan forcefully grabbed one bowl and took part of the cookies and chocolates inside it. "Hey! This is mine!"

"No, this is Virgil's. He won't be able to come for our movie night so he asked us to keep some food for him."

"Do you think if we watch more movies we will be able to wait for him to come back?" Patton questioned.

"I can't say for certain since I am not sure how long his date will be."

Roman snorted. "If I taught him well, he is not coming for tonight. Gotta enjoy the-" Patton shoved a cookie on Roman's face, successfully stopping his sentence.

"Nope!" He smiled, now proceeding to shove a cookie on his own mouth before trying to give Logan the same treatment, pouting when he saw that the other was already munching a sweet, eyeing him warily. He unpaused the movie. "He is my baby brother and I'm not thinking about that!"

The movie night started quiet. For today, quiet was more than nice to Patton.

Then, in the part when the protagonist learned that there was magic in her world, Logan grabbed his hand and started to trace lightly, in slow shapes all the way over the lines across his palm, his fingers sometimes traveling to his pulse and forearm in a few swirls before going back to the previous spot. A small, however permanent smile began to gleam on Patton’s face.

He knew this was going to happen. Logan was one of his first friends who discovered his liking for tickling somewhere on the beginning of their journey to their friendship, as well as how comforting that activity could be for him.

A faint blush still dotted his cheeks when he thought about that. Today was not an exception, the soft touches made butterflies wiggle their wings in excitement on his tummy, a wobbly tune taking over his smile, especially when he saw Logan’s slight grin at his quiet reactions.

Patton glued his eyes on the screen, refusing to acknowledge his friend’s antics, which led to a yelp escaping from his barriers when a hand rested on his side, pulling him closer to the half hug and sneaking a couple of pokes on the ticklish spot.

“You good, Pat?” Roman quirked an eyebrow in his direction and Patton felt his face get hottier, giggles beginning to bubble in his throat when the pokes evolved to a drag of fingers that went up to his ribs and then down, back to his hips, blunt nails spiraling and teasing carefully the sensitive skin. He did his best to not squeal and squirm away.

“Yes! I aham.” He beamed, trying to dislodge the walking tickles and dissipate the giddy energy spreading across his nerves. “I just really like this sce-eene!”

Logan hummed innocently under Patton’s pout thrown in his direction, as if didn’t just squeeze his side right when he was talking. “I believe it’s an important scene for the plot, yes.”

Roman squinted his eyes at the screen. "She's literally just asleep.”

“Yeah!” Patton giggled, scrunching his nose as he did so. “I think that part is very-” Logan decided that was a very good time to concentrate his efforts on prodding and exploring every single ticklish inch of his right lowest rib, knowing very well each weak spot and wasting not a single effort to put his best friend in stitches. Patton felt his resolve break, uncontrollable titters pouring from his lips. “Funny!” He squealed. “Very, very funny!”

“Really, can you explain why you think that, please?”

“Logan!”

“I am merely curious to understand your concept of humor, Patton.” Logan mused, finally letting go of his hand to attack his sides, making the cat lover to clap his hands on his mouth, hiding the snorts who were trying to fly from his lips. “Maybe I will even start to see why you’re so adamant on making so many puns on your daily basis.”

Patton shook his head, giving up from trying to not react to his friend’s attack in order to wiggle away from his curious hands and silly scribbly fingers. Sadly, he ended up making the mistake of turning his back to Roman, who, watching the whole ordeal, let a devilish smirk take over his face.

Before Patton could even protest against Logan’s words, two arms hugged him from bei, hands squirming to rest, in a mock of safety, on his armpits. “Hey, Specs, guess what!”

“No! Roman!” Patton squeaked, kicking at the feeling of one more attack concentrated on another ticklish spot, crackles beginning to paint his laughter here and there as Roman’s fingers began to tease the skin, his thumbs just barely twitching on the place, fingers clawing at his high ribs. “No, no, please!”

“Yes, Roman?” Logan answered, using the opportunity to give the other a break and stop his tickling.

“You know what I realized? That Patty Cake here,” Patton’s giggles only got higher when Roman decided to nuzzle his neck, words coming out muffled as they hit the sensitive skin. “Who has the purest, sweetest dazzling smile, haven’t told us how amazing he is today.”

“Nonono, please not this! Not this!” Patton turned to Logan, who was the more susceptible and within his field of view. He put the best puppy eyes he could muster through his giggles and uncontrollable titters that still fell from his lips. “Lo-lo,” he pouted in order to give his face a stronger power. Logan stared at him as a deed caught in the light. “Plehehea- nahaha!” A shriek flew from his mouth. “Roman, not fair!”

Roman smirked, dramatically preparing himself for another raspberry.

“Don’t even think about using your evil Puppy Eyes on our defenseless Microsoft Nerd!” He drowned Logan’s protest by making Patton shriek with another attack. Peals of loud laughter filled the room when he decided to release smaller raspberries, traveling from one side to other of the cat lover’s neck.

“Anyway,” Logan ruffed, concentrating a sea of squeezes on Patton’s knees as a revenge, relishing in the way his blush travelled over all his face when snorts and squeals began to become more and more frequent. “You were talking about making Patton tell us something?”

“Oh, yeah! I was thinking about being really nice today, since our dear Laffy Taffy Patty looks a bit tired.” As the words came out of his mouth, Roman changed his technique to something softer, watching amused as Patton wiggled non when he decided to drag his fingers on his sides, scribbling them to his chin - and, of course, resting a couple of kisses on his neck, he wasn’t a monster - and them tapping his way down, this time choosing to give a bit of attention to his shaky tummy. “So we could just make him admit something small and simple, really! You won’t even notice when the words come out, dear!” He changed his attention to the victim on his arms, hugging him close and nuzzling him.

“Please! Not there, not there!!” Patton tried to dislodge the other’s tickly affection from his ears and neck, but being constantly distracted by Logan, who kept sneaking horribly, unbearable scratches to the sensitive skin under his knees everytime he stopped trying to pry his hands from his legs. “I wihihill give you my cohohokies! All of them! Plehehease.”

“That is very kind of you, Patton. However, I think it isn’t very polite of you to interrupt Roman like that.” Logan tsked, now letting go of both his knees to concentrate his efforts in tormenting the weak spots of just one. “Please, I do ask for you to refrain from laughing about such a serious matter. I can almost believe you’re not taking your cheering up as seriously as we are.”

“I am! I am!!”

“Then why are you laughing?”

“Because you-” he snorted, shaking his head and closing his eyes. “You are t-tickling me!”

Logan’s eyes lit up with mischief, a playful wink being thrown at Roman’s direction before he returned his gaze to the previously-sad friend. “I can guarantee you I am not.”

“Falsehohohood!”

“Very well.” The one with an unicorn onesie lifted his arms, crossing them on his chest just as the other attacker also stopped his tickling. “See? I am not even touching you. And yet you’re still giggling yourself silly as, ah, Roman would say.”

Patton clamped his mouth shut, trying to keep the remainescent giggles trapped on his chest, a slight feeling of dejavu hitting him. He shook his head.

“No? You’re not a Smiley Laffy Taffy, you say?”

“Stop stealing my sweet nicknames!”

Just as the one with a big, truly gigantic smile would shake his head again, his giggling actually being subdued, Roman decided that was just the perfect moment to vibrate his hands on his lower stomach, his barrier crumbling, again, in a matter of seconds.

“Roman!”

“I see.” Logan mused, in between Patton’s high pitched squeaks when the other failed to cease his attack. “So, you're a serious case of Giggle Bug.”

“Am not!” He cried in protest, holding Roman’s pulse, not really trying to push it away.

“Oh, no!” Roman dramatically cried, fishing more laughter from the puppy lover. “What are we going to do Patton? Are we doomed to hear your cute, amazing giggly giggles and delightful laughter forever and ever and ever? What shall we do, Specs?”

Logan sighs, deep and serious, adjusting his glasses. “I fear there is nothing we can do except mitigate this unfortunate situation. As you can see…” Logan poked Patton’s torso, prodding some of the most ticklish ribs with a tiny, soft smile when the other bounced around, happy yelps pouring from his lips. He cleaned his throat, going back to the character. “This ribcage is full of all sorts of trapped squeals, snorts, squeaks, titters and giggles. As Patton’s friends, we must free them all to help him.”

“Crofters!” Patton suddenly blurted out, his laughter almost making the words untelligible. “I will tell you where Ro-ro keeps his Crof-nahahaha!” Patton squirmed when Roman kneaded his hips, a mischief glint still present on his smile. “Rohohoman!”

“Dishonesty! Trickery! Treason!” The one with red pajamas protested with a betrayed shriek. “Patton! After all the adventures we had gone through, after accepting you in my family as a brother, how could you do that to me? Oh, jail for friend! Jail for the Giggle Bug for one thousand of years!”

“I am sorry! I am very sahahaharrey!” Patton’s eyes widened when he saw Roman form a claw with his both hands, slowly descending them to his belly. “Waitwaitwait! Ro! Ro-ro! Ple-please!”

“No can do, Patty Cake.” Roman sighed in faux sadness, wiggling his fingers for a good effect. “Now I have no alternative except having to getcha, getcha, getcha! Your yummy tummy is all mine, now. ~”

But then nothing happened.

Roman’s hands stopped, leaving a puddle of giggly Patton to basically melt more in his embrace, lost in titters and phantom tickles.

“Oh,” Roman said, carefully, the tune of his voice making a shiver run across Logan’s spine. “Hello, Logan.”

Logan accepted his fate, trying another experimental squeeze at the dramatic friend’s side and receiving, just like his first try a few seconds ago, no reaction. He sighed. “I presume you’re not ticklish on your sides, then.”

“And I presume it just takes the mention of Crofters to make you turn the tables.” Roman gave Patton a last quick kiss on his neck, gaining another happy giggle before ruffling his hair. “Excuse me, Giggly Bug, it seems like our dear Blushy Bear is craving for a bit of my tickly attention right now.”

Patton hugged his sides, smile shiny as the sun, the clouds which previously assaulted him haven been already disappeared for a long time, now. His gleaming eyes glued on Logan, smile widening when he remembered he was the one who started everything.

“Get him, Ro-ro!”

And, as pleas and teases felt the air, Patton took another deep breath, letting his friends have some fun before he turned the tables at Roman, since he also deserved some good, nice tickles for being such a caring friend. Soon enough Logan’s laughter rang across the room and Patton only smiled wider.

Full of life, indeed.

#The beginning is quite sad but I swear it gets much lighter and fun in just some paragraphs #Finally managed to reduce my introduction I've been trying to do this for AGES but no idea appeared in my mind #<333 #Patton and Logan's friendship was so so incredibly funto write I can't believe I've been stopping myself to write logicality for years bc-#-I was afraid of not doing them justice #I am literally so happy I managed to finish this fic. I am so so proud of it. Finally I wrote some nice cheer up tickles #aaaaa #You can pry them being happy and having fun together from my very cold dead hands #Lee!Patton #Ticklish!Patton #Ler!Logan #Ler!Roman #Mouth tickles #Sanders Sides tickles #Sanders Sides tickling #Kanene's fic #Kanene's Fanfic #Human AU #Alternative universe #If you read this before I remember to edit and put the title no you didn't sdfrgthyujikcv #xD

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justaself-shipper · 3 years

Text

Amity x Reader- Safe and Sound

I awoke to the sound of knocking. Glancing to my window, I noticed it was dark outside. I was confused, wondering who could be knocking at this hour.

Getting out of bed, I tiptoed to my front door. The knocking came again, but much more quieter this time. Taking a deep breath, I opened the front door. I didn't notice anything at first, but then something moved at my feet. Looking down, I almost gasped at the witch lying face down on the ground. Her brown hair covered her face, but I'd recognise that hair style anywhere. Lifting the witch bridal style, I carried her indoors, setting her on the couch.

Moving the brown locks from her face, I took note that she had a wound on her head, as well as blood covering her clothes in patches.

Turning around, I headed to my bathroom, opening my cupboard and taking the first -aid kit I always kept in the house. I frowned as I headed back to the injured witch. A million thoughts ran through my head, but I had to keep calm if I wanted to help this witch.

The main thought that never left my mind as I tended to her wounds was this though: What was Amity Blight doing on my doorstep, injured and bleeding to death?

I'd learned that Lillith and Luz had gone missing, Eda was captured once again, and Amity, Willow and Gus were hiding after battling the emperor. The war over the Boiling Isles continues, with Emperor Belos getting stronger everyday. The three teens were hiding away, taking shelter in witches homes.

Amity had shown up on my doorstep, injured and needing shelter. I couldn't say no to her. I loved her too much to abandon her when she needed my help.

It has been several days since she arrived, and she's been healing well. A little impatient and worried about Luz, Willow and Gus, but still doing well. I was working in the kitchen while she studied more spells in the lounge room. Carrying a tray of hot chocolate into the lounge room, I spotted Amity peeking through the curtains of my cabin. Briskly walking over, I put the tray down. I sighed. "Amity, I know you're worried, but if you want to defeat the emperor, you need to be strong and healthy. Don't worry, I'm sure everything will work out." I smiled, closing the curtains and pulling Amity into a hug. After a moment, she accepted the gesture and embraced me back, tightly. Looking up at the framed picture of Luz, Willow, Gus, Amity and I, I did wonder if everything would work out.

As we hugged, I pulled Amity away from me, looking into her beautiful amber eyes. "Don't worry Amity. I'll be here to protect you." I smiled softly. "Mittens, promise me that you'll take care of yourself if anything does happen, ok?" I asked this time. Amity's eyes widened at the nickname, but a nodded, embracing me once again. I cuddled her back, as my thoughts were filled with nothing but determination to protect her.

Amity and I sat at the table, memorising spells and practicing Luz's glyphs. Hearing knocking on the door, I glanced up, staring intently at the door. Who could that be?

The knocking came again, much louder and insistent this time. Standing up, I glanced down at Amity. "Go, hide in the attic. I'll call you down when it's safe." I whispered. Amity looked up at me with wide eyes. "What about you?"

"I'll be fine. Go, now."

Nodding, she left the room. The banging on the door came again, so I headed over. Opening the door, I realised Emperor Belos' guards were on my doorstep, the Golden guard standing at the doorway.

"Greetings witch. I assume you're Y/N L/N?" He asked, and I nodded in reply. He continued. "We've been informed that you've been hiding a dangerous criminal in your home. Is this true." It sounded more like a statement than a question.

"No, I don't believe it is. May I ask who this criminal is?" I asked casually, my expression blank. The Golden guard tilted his head. "Amity Blight, daughter of Odalia Blight and Alador Blight. In any case, we'll have to search your cabin." He replied. The guards stepped forward, attempting to barge inside. I stood my ground, creating abominations to use as shields. I scowled at the Golden guard, and turned around, fleeing toward the attic. They'd probably use a spell to find Amity, so I had to get her out of here.

I wasn't going to let them have Mittens that easily.

I pulled the attic door open, climbing up the ladder. I peered inside. "Amity! Amity, come on! We gotta go!" I cried. Amity came out from behind the boxes. Grabbing her hand, I led her toward the back door. As I opened it, I halted in my tracks. There were guards blocking the exits.

"Nice try, L/N, but you'll have to try better than that."

I turned to face the Golden guard, a scowl on my features. Amity stood behind me, watching my back. The Golden guard chuckled.

"Now, if you hand over the criminal peacefully, I'll forget about your little abomination trick back there. But if you refuse, I won't hesitate to terminate both of you."

My eyes widened, and I glanced over my shoulder to Amity. She glanced back at me for a brief moment, her amber iris's filled with fear.

I made up my mind in that moment.

Turning back to the Golden guard, I sighed sadly. "I'm sorry Amity." I said quietly. Casting a spell quickly, I created a small army of abominations. A dozen attacked the guards standing at the back door, while a dozen kept the Golden guard and his six guards distracted. One abomination lifted Amity from the ground, and ran out the door.

Amity was screaming at the abomination, hitting and kicking it as she attempted to escape its grasp, but to no avail.

"Y/N! NO!" She screamed reaching out to me in vain.

I gave her a quick smile as she disappeared into the night. "You'll be alright Amity. Come morning light, you'll be safe and sound." There was only one way for Amity to stay safe, and that was if I stayed behind and kept the emperors goons distracted.

Turning back to the Golden guard, I armed myself as he attacked.

Part 2?

A/N: sorry if it's a little fast paced or doesn't make sense.

#toh #the owl house #amity blight #amity x reader #x reader #fanfiction #self insert #self ship #selfship #luz noceda #emperor belos #golden guard #willow park #gus porter #augustus porter #eda #lillith

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shtern-and-art · 3 years

Note

"Skeppy will probably cry" "Bad will probably cry". Bish, screw, that I am crying!!!

This whole thing was bloody gorgeous and I wasn't expecting that ending. I had no clue what ending to expect but that was definitely better than any I could have hoped for. Forest spirit to soulmate your honour!

I was terrified that you were gonna leave it at the point where he loses the spirit and becomes mortal again. If you had I would be actively sobbing!!!! And oh my god, the art!!! I still can't get over how wonderful your style is.

Imma ask fun things because if I don't I'll sit in a puddle of emotion all night:

What's the first tech thing Bad will buy and how annoying will he be about it? Poor Skeppy trying to answer 101 questions about something he doesn't really use XD.

Is no one concerned that the odd couple from a town they never name has a pet wolf??

Do they immediately go over to a different town or do they wander for a while. Find hidden creeks and befriend bears?

Does Bad still have a connection to nature and animals, like are creatures naturally more trusting of him?

Do they ever visit the og town again?

Does Skeppy still cause absolute chaos in other towns or has he learnt his lesson and only causes minor trouble now?

Does Bad ever try and study again? If he did what would he study and would Skeppy try to study as well?

Does Skeppy steal? I dunno, he just give off the vibe of a naughty lil trickster who'll pocket something if the owner refuses to sell it him.

Immediately after leaving the forest what the first 'argument' they have (not including the car one)?

Would they ever ride horse? If yes, how terrified would Skeppy be?

Skeppy falls outta tree. I don't know why but my mind keeps telling me that this man has great balance until he climbs trees. They are his mortal enemy and Bad finds this both hilarious and terrifying because he is going to hurt himself.

I had waaaaay more questions than I intended to have. My bad '^_^ but this story was way too much fun to read and you are entirely to blame for making it so engaging!

Make sure to take care of yourself and do stretches after and during drawing. You don't wanna hurt yourself <3

AaaaI’m so glad you liked it! :D And, dang, man, I cried while writing that part too :D

And I promised a nice ending for the main story, I did, and this one also makes the most sense narratively! For the story I wanted to tell, at least. Bad can’t really become human again, he’s changed to much. He can only move on, and do something with what he is, and has. And he did! :D That’s really nice and inspiring, this story will always have a place in my heart, heheh <3

Being a guardian spirit connected to a person and all, Bad may be not as strong as before, but he can’t die unless Skeppy dies first. And Skeppy can do that, but he’s pretty sturdy, and his lifespan operates on a whole other scale than human ones. And Bad knowing Skeppy’s real name balances it all out, makes them equal in the power and influence they have over each other.

So hellyeah, soulmates for the win :DDD

I’ll answer all questions under the cut, and this close up from one of the pages!

1) What's the first tech thing Bad will buy and how annoying will he be about it?

Probably a pager! Because it’s a more feasible thing to get than a wholeass computer Bad actually wanted :D An it means Skeppy will have to get one too, and that Bad will be having the time of his life texting him and everyone he can get a number from, even if they’re still in the room with him.

Poor Skeppy indeed, he can learn to appreciate the pagers, and later phones, too, and computers, but he really has 0 idea on how it all works and why Bad is so fascinated by it all.

2) Rat and regular people

Oh, she can shapeshift, just like Bad! If they’re out with people around, she takes form of a puppy, and Bad can pass her off as a weird mix breed rescue doggo.

3) Do they immediately go over to a different town or do they wander for a while?

Oh, since they have no end destination in mind, they can ride around for a bit, go visit some cool places and roadside attractions. Sadly, Skeppy is probably not spiritually or morally ready to full on befriend wild bears yet, and they do need money for gas and snacks. So, at some point they will have to stop somewhere and find work – at least for a bit, to save up. Life’s gonna be a bit complicated with all that, until Skeppy figures out his treasure-finding abilities :DD

4) Bad and nature and animals

He is definitely still in tune with all wildlife! Even more – Bad could become a proper guardian spirit for Skeppy in part because, in a way, Skeppy himself is part of the nature.

So yeah, Bad can understand animals (and plants) and communicate with them; they’re just more free to not take his shit, and Bad’s emotions do not “possess” them unless he makes an effort to do so.

He doesn’t like doing it, tho.

5) Do they ever visit the og town again?

Hm, I think they will completely forget about it for a while, until, like, 30+ years later they will be going somewhere, and find themselves around those parts. And they try to not appear too often in the areas they’ve spent a lot of time in already (they can be pretty recognizable, and also barely show signs of aging). But it’s been a long time, and the town’s really different now… So they make a stop, and spend a day there. They walk the unfamiliar streets between the new buildings, check out the popular hiking trail, the advertisements for hot springs and winter activities. The old cinema is still there, and is hosting an all-night marathon of classic horror movies of the last century.

Bad and Skeppy leave the town after sunset – the day was nice, but they have nothing more to do there. They ride through the forest on a well paved road, with radio playing something barely above the whisper. And in the dark of hot summer night, Bad can see the white stag running between the trees alongside their car. Shadows dance over the shimmering light of it’s fur.

Somewhere after the towns border, the stag disappears back in the forest. But the air in the car stays light and fresh, saving the smell of old pines and dry leaves all though the night.

6) Skeppy and chaos

Well, after the whole mess in the main story, Skeppy definitely learned some lessons, especially about not being a dick :D

But the thing is – he can’t really help the fact that things tend to stir up around him a lot. He naturally brings in chaos into everything, because he is, in part, a personification, or an outlet for it in the world. And so, to feel, well and good, and himself Skeppy gotta do stuff that disrupts balance, and creates some mayhem. And in gave him a lot of trouble in early life, but in the course of the main story he learned that he can chose were he lets that chaos to take hold, learned what can come of that chaos, apart from utter misery.

Like, where it can help dismantle something destructive, and where – bring in the more positive change, that was already brewing, possible, but is stagnant for some reason.

Soooo, I can’t say Skeppy causes only minor chaos in his life, but he sure learns even more about not being a dick :DDDD

7) The studying

I think Bad will want to get a higher education at some point, because he wanted to, and because it’s already new millennia and all that. Bet he’ll go for something very technical and/or literature. Maybe he’ll start by piking up some classes in small time colleges, when they stop in one place for a while, and later get into an online program, because why not.

Skeppy is not a college guy at all. He’ll listen to Bad talk about it, read textbooks if he wants to, can research stuff, buuut going to classes and doing homework is definitely not his thing.

8) Stealing

Well, you’re right, Skeppy can and will steal stuff out of spite! And will be scolded by Bad for it, and will not feel (that) sorry about it. But real stealer between them will be Bad himself :D

It’s just… he has the corvid tendencies, and a hoard (a box) of sentimental mementos from different people and events, and the thrill of stealing something small and harmless is very exciting. Bad is very proud of his little collection. Skeppy finds it very adorable, a bit hypocritical, and kinda creepy. Like, that pretty box he gifted Bad at some point is now full of stuff like:

- pressed flower from the clearing they had a picnic at on their anniversary

- the button the waitress lost that one day the storm caused a black out in the whole town

- some small animal bones

- couple pretty rocks Bad stole from Skeppy’s pockets

- penny that was once glued to the ground

- a handful of teeth people (and not people) lost in fights with Bad

- pen from some fancy hotel

- rainbow dash keychain that belonged to a child

- the list goes on

9) Argument

Oh, that same day they’ll fight over whether they should stay at the really crappy and suspicious looking motel, or go sleep in a perfectly fine forest near the road. Ironically, Bad wanted to try out the motel (because, yay, first time spending the night back in civilization), and Skeppy was the one insisting on sleeping in nature (because the motel looks like it could give you 10 diseases if you even stand near it, and sleeping in the forest is kind of nice, and means they can cuddle).

10) Horses

The guys will probably ride them at some point. Well, Bad will ride, and Skeppy will sit on his horse and hope it knows what to do and where to go, because trying to make this giant thing do something seems dangerous. If they’ll have to actually go somewhere fast, Skeppy will not survive that day, his butt (and legs) will be dead for days to come.

And riding with Bad on one horse may sound romantic and nice, but all romance dies when the gallop starts.

11) Skeppy and climbing

Skeppy is more down to earth kind of guy, more of a “rocks and caves” kind of creature, real-life lizard person or something. Up on the trees and in the air – not really his element, yeah. But it doesn’t mean that Skeppy will accept this fact easy. The embarrassment of never managing to safely make it down a tree is too strong, he just has to do it all over again, and again. And again. Because, clearly, he was distracted this time. And the time before that Bad was teasing him, and it “disrupted his flow”. And, really, maybe these trees here just do not like Skeppy much, and make him slip a lot. Yeah.

So, more often than not, if Skeppy climbs a tree, he will not stop climbing it until he falls, or the tree ends. Bad had to take him off high branches couple times, forcefully, because, of course, Skeppy was sitting there for 2 hours just to properly enjoy the sunset. He can climb down at any point, he just Choses not to. The view is amazing. The bark is literally part of his skin now, not because he holds on tight, no, he’s just Than Much one with the nature )<

---

Don’t apologize for the questions! It’s always so fun to answer them, and it makes me think more about stuff I may have skipped, or didn’t think about before. It’s really nice :3c

Again, thank you for the ask, and for being here for this story! <3

(And I’ll try setting timers for rest breaks while I draw, mb that will help)

---

In The Dark - masterpost

#mcyt #mcyt fanart #badboyhalo #skeppy #skephalo #In The Dark #it's so hot here #my laptop's keyboard is like a stove #=c=#shtern talks

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starlight-starwrites · 3 years

Note

not me taking days to come up with a request 😌💅 lmao may I get some hurt/comfort with Ezra 🥺 maybe he or Reader is injured and the other has to patch them up (and maybe they feel at fault for the other's injury 🥺) thank you, my love 😍 you're the best! 😘💜

Angel

ezra x reader

wc: 2.9k (oops this was supposed to be like 1k...) warnings: some non descriptive violence, swearing, injuries, hurt/comfort, vague and inaccurate medical care, and soft feelings (it ends in fluff i swear it) note: not me taking weeks to answer it 😌 so sorry i took so long to get this out for you!!! but i hope it lives up to the wait? i also couldn’t decide who should be injured and who would feel at fault so i said ~both~ :)

“Shit, shit.”

You pull Ezra’s arm tighter over your shoulders, but his added weight aggravates your leg. Your limp slows you down, but you aren’t leaving him behind. Not after what he did for you.

“Ezra, c’mon.” You jostle him slightly as you try to stumble further back to the pod, moving as fast as you can. You don’t know if he’s fully conscious. “Please you gotta help me out. I can’t do this on my own.”

He mumbles something into your shoulder, and you don’t quite catch it. But he’s not unconscious. Not yet.

“Fuck,” you cry out. You can see the pod in front of you, it’s so close now. But Ezra still sways into your side, barely able to do more than drag his feet after you. A jolt of pain shoots though your leg, and you collapse onto one knee. “Ezra!” Tears prick at your eyes.

You’re so close. So fucking close.

You can hear shouts behind you, and the fear rises. You had shot one of them, though not fatally, after Ezra had killed two of theirs. You didn’t know how many were left. Not too many, but certainly too many to take on by yourself while injured.

You try to push yourself up with your one good leg, tucking yourself under Ezra’s arm to get him up, but it’s too much. You sob into the cold air, trying to catch your breath. Castomore had a breathable atmosphere so you didn’t need helmets, but the air was thin, and combined with your recent skirmish, you were already feeling lightheaded.

“Ez, please,” you whisper. His head lolls to the side, mouth moving but eyes closed.

You can’t do it. You sink to your knees in the powdered snow, tears already freezing on your face. You lower Ezra slowly to the ground next to you and try not to cry again at the sight of the red stains on his suit. You don’t have a choice anymore. You could hole yourselves up in the pod for a while, maybe try to fix Ezra and yourself up best you can. But it would only delay the inevitable.

You’d be trapped inside, and the miscreants following you would get you eventually, possibly even damage the pod before you could do anything. You couldn’t afford to be trapped here.

Ezra still breathes, talking quietly, though nothing more than nonsense. You drag him behind a fallen tree, hiding him as best you can for now. You sling the thrower off your back, prepping it quickly.

You only have one option now.

Ezra’s face is soaked in sweat despite the cold, and you steel yourself. You wouldn’t let it end like this. You wouldn’t let him die for something that was your fault. His cheek is scratchy under your palm, and you gently brush your thumb along his face. You resolve to tell him. You’d tell him exactly how you felt if you survived this.

Another shout comes, this time closer. You breathe out and look away from the man that lays on the ground, taking up your thrower and balancing it on the stump you hide behind. You turn your head, squint through the scope, waiting for it to come into focus.

Three men. One limping, just like you.

You take another deep breath. Take Aim. Fire.

Ezra jolts up with a gasp, nearly knocking into you, and you have to push him back down just to make sure he doesn’t make his wound any worse.

The stim in your hand is quickly tossed away, both hands gently holding him and pressing on his chest.

“Hey,” you say it softly while his eyes dart quickly around your cabin, “just breathe, we’re safe now.”

He glances around, checking your surroundings as if he were still in danger. His heart beats rapidly underneath your palm now, so much faster than the dull thump when he lay unconscious. You breathe a sigh of relief.

“I had to stim you,” you reach up to smooth down his hair, and his panicked eyes meet yours. “Ezra, we’re alright, I just need you to breathe okay? You’re shot full of adrenaline, it’s going to take a moment, just stay with me baby?”

He lets his head fall back on the bunk beneath him, trying to breathe just like you said.

“What?” His voice is nothing more than a rasp, and you carefully check the bandage you pressed to his skin. The bleeding has slowed considerably.

“A stim,” you say it slowly, thinking he didn’t understand you. “I had to bring you back, but now I need you to try and breathe.”

His eyes slipped closed when he smiles, huffing a laugh that quickly turns into a wince.

“Ezra.”

You diligently work on fully patching him up now, wiping up some of the residue from the medpatch you put on him, and securing it nicely with the bandage tape.

“What appears to be my diagnosis, Doctor? Am I to continue on this wretched rock, or will I be sent to float among the stars?”

Even injured as he is, he still finds a way to be melodramatic. Or maybe he’s just cracking a joke at your expense.

You roll your eyes. “You’ll live. Now be quiet while I clean you up.”

Tossing away some of the wipes you used earlier, you tidy up the bunk to turn back to your patient. He smiles, eyes still closed, and you take the moment to admire his features.

He looks like shit.

His skin is pale and lips blue from the cold. His hair is slicked back with sweat and dark circles lie under his eyes. Added with his cut open suit and the patches on his chest and abdomen, he looks lucky to be alive.

You focus on cleaning up the dried blood, inspecting him for any other injuries as you sit on the bunk beside him. His smile slowly fades.

“Does it hurt at all when you breathe?”

He shakes his head, eyes opening. He reaches a hand up over yours and holds it to his chest as he looks to you.

“What happened?” his voice sounds weak. He looks so tired. You’re willing to bet you both do. You needed a week’s worth of rotations just to recover from this expedition. Neither of you were on top of your game—hadn’t been for some time now.

The both of you lost more money and supplies than you made so far, and every chance you got to make up the difference somehow ended in disaster. You sadly stared at his bandages.

“They’re dead,” you whisper. “I got you back here while you were unconscious.”

His thumb strokes the back of your hand. “My angel.”

You look up, see the slight curve to his lips. He’s trying to comfort you.

It’s your turn to close your eyes, hold back the tears you’ve been trying get rid of since the moment you stopped outside, fully believing that was your last stand.

“I’m so sorry, Ez.” Your voice cracks, and that’s when it starts. A silent tear tracks down your cheek, and you shake your head when you feel him squeeze your hand tight. “I’m so sorry, I thought it would be fine, I should have listened to you, I should never have made you come—”

“Hey.” He squeezes tighter and all you think is that you’re relieved he has some strength left. “This ain’t your fault. We went together.” His hand lets go of yours, and he moves to place it on your thigh. “Here I lay, nothing more than a sad—”

“Ow!” you yelp as soon as his hand closes around your leg.

He immediately snatches it away at your cry, startled. He starts to sit up, looking over you truly for the first time. His eyes widen when they see the track of blood that runs down your leg, the torn hole in your trousers.

“You’re hurt.”

He’s shocked by it. You had forgone checking over yourself and instead focused only on the man before you now. The pain had dulled to a constant throb, uncomfortable, but with more pressing matters at hand, able to ignore. His reminder suddenly brings it back.

You shift where you sit, taking your leg away from his reach, and he starts to sit up.

“No, you need to lie down,” you say through gritted teeth. “You shouldn’t be moving, just rest.”

“You are hurt. Let me—” He looks at you more intently now, scanning your body. You’re not sure what he sees. His face morphs into an expression of concern, then anger. “Look at me.”

You don’t move. He’s forced to reach up, and you can tell it strains him. His fingers take your chin, turning your head to the side so he can look at the part of your face you hid from him. He looks murderous.

“They shot you.”

“It was just a graze.”

“They shot you twice.”

You lower your head. Feeling the dull ache in your leg, your cheek. Your arm.

“Three times,” you whisper.

Your jacket is pulled off, revealing the hole in your bicep. It went straight through, seemed to have missed your artery, going through the meat of your upper arm. You were lucky. Incredibly lucky.

Ezra stares at it, breathing raggedly still. He says nothing for once, situating himself so he can sit on the edge just as you do. He should be resting, but you refuse to say anything more. You make sure he is as comfortable as can be, help him bring the field kit closer so he doesn’t have to reach.

He takes care of you silently, efficiently patching up your leg first. His brow is furrowed, eyes focused as he does it. You hate how it makes you feel. You had almost gotten him killed, and now here he was, forced to patch you up too.

The arm is quicker than your leg, and his hands are rough and shaking as he wraps the white cloth around it. He tries not to aggravate it, you know that, but it still hurts when he pulls it tight. You had used most of the pain killers when you worked on him. You would just have to bear it.

His hands still before coming to gently hold your face again, turning it towards him. Your eyes find the white square on his chest, and you think of the hole underneath. You’d almost lost him because of a reckless decision, because you had been foolish and greedy and too tired to care. It was your fault, and you deserved the three wounds you sustained. But he didn’t.

You feel Ezra swipe his thumb over your uninjured cheek, taking a tear with it. “Sweet angel,” he whispers, “don’t you cry for me.”

Your chest shudders when you breathe, and as he carefully wipes the blood from your cheek, you fight to not collapse into him. “I almost got you killed. I could have lost you. And I—” You stop yourself quickly, feeling a pull in your chest again.

You wonder if he remembers how you screamed when he went down, how you yelled and begged for him to stay with you, how you whispered your confession into the frozen air when you feared you wouldn’t make it.

“You’ve done nothing of the sort.” His touch his gentle as he cleans you up, tilts your head so he has better access to the gash that runs from the bridge of your cheekbone to the tip of your ear. He looks so tired and worn, and you want to comfort him. All you can do is bring your hand to his leg, relieved by his proximity and that he’s still here to speak with you. His gaze is fixed on your cheek, thumb still stroking your other, obviously distracted from treating your graze. “It was my fault, birdie. I…”

He trails off, a pained look in his eye as he turns from your cheek to your bandaged leg. You sag where you sit, leaning closer but still hesitate to put any weight on him. “No, Ez, it’s not.”

“I vowed once I would protect you,” he steels himself as he says it, snapping back into action and raising the disinfectant to your cheek. The sting makes you hiss, stopping you from interrupting him. “I may not be much, but if I was ever a man of my word, I was to you.”

He patches you up quietly, and you watch his eyes as they follow the graze along your cheek. You never had the chance to look at yourself, but from what you surmised by the blood flow, it wasn’t too deep. He pointedly fails to meet your gaze, scanning you for anything else while he smooths the bandage at your face, his other hand braced on the bunk by your hip to keep him upright.

He was right. Ezra was many things, but he had never lied to you. And remembering the promise you made to yourself not minutes before, you wouldn’t make a liar of yourself either.

“I love you, Ezra.”

His one hand fumbles with the tape and it falls into your lap.

“I’m afraid these drugs might be a little stronger than I first believed, angel.” His lips quirk up nervously, and his eyes dart between yours. “What did you just say?”

“I love you.”

It feels like such a small thing to say. As though the words don’t really convey exactly what you want them to mean. It’s a true statement, and you’re not afraid to say it finally. No matter how it’s received, it’s true, and you think he at least ought to know it.

It doesn’t stop you from fiddling with seam of your pants however, and you drop your gaze from his when he’s still quiet.

His hand comes back to gently cup your jaw, just under the now-bandaged gash.

“I’m…still not sure I…”

You lean forward at the same time he does, your hand finding the curve of his face. His lips fit nicely to yours, like they were meant to be there. His forehead rests against yours, nose brushing your uninjured cheek, and each of you become the other’s support. Neither of you move for a moment, content to feel the press of each other’s lips, have the knowledge that someone cared for you, and, of course, much too exhausted to do anything else.

He breathes out, lips adjusting over yours before his thumb brushes your cheek. You tense as the touch skirts over the edge of your bandage. Ezra pulls back, and you already mourn the loss of his warmth. You drop your hand from his face to his shoulder, and he grunts at the pressure, the two of you barely able to hold each other upright.

“I must apologize,” he speaks slowly but a soft smile plays on his lips. “As much as I should like to, I cannot in good conscience—” he breathes deep again, a hand over his chest, “nor in good health do anything more.”

You let out an easy laugh, finding it hard to keep your eyes open now that you had to chance to close them.

“Please, angel,” he starts again while letting himself lie back against the bunk, hand taking hold of yours on the way. “Please tell me we’ve at least earned a moment of respite.”

“Yeah, Ez,” you set the kit on the floor, not wanting to deal with anything else now. The man you love is calling you to bed. “We can have a moment.” Or ten, you think.

You shuffle silently in next to him, fitting so the two of you can lay shoulder to shoulder. You turn your head to watch his eyes slip closed, just as he reaches to clasp your hand in his and entwines your fingers over his stomach.

You let him, finding the bunk somehow much more comfortable than it ever was before. Your eyes roam over his face, noting the way his lashes kiss his cheek, the slope of his nose that dips to the curve of his mouth, the patches of scruff along his jaw. His eyelids flutter as he settles, his chest moving with each breath, and you’re grateful to see the life in him.

His head turns to face you, eyes opening just as yours drift closed, too heavy to keep open. You’re safe in your temporary home, nestled into Ezra’s side. No one was left to chase you, the pod is sealed, your wounds bandaged. You breathe easier, reassuring yourself that all is well, just as you feel a finger trace along the side of your face, carefully avoiding your newest scar. Even as you begin to fade, the action makes you smile, and you sigh, focusing in on the small details you still feel.

His thumb caresses yours, the gentle motion lulling you further to sleep. You only feel the hard press of the bunk mat at your back, the press of his shoulder to yours and the touch of his hand. All you hear is the gentle hum of the air regulator and his soft breathing, and just before you drift off, Ezra’s quiet whisper.

“I love you too, angel.”

#ezra x reader #ezra (prospect) x reader #ezra prospect #ezra (prospect)

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waitimcomingtoo · 4 years

Text

Cherry Wine

Pairing: Peter Parker x Reader

Synopsis: Peters new girlfriend isn’t what she seems

WARNING: domestic abuse

Masterlist

Lorina Dodson.

Peters girlfriend of two months now. You and Ned didn’t think they’d last more than a week but they had somehow managed to surpass all expectations.

You tried to be happy for Peter, but you just could my figure out what he saw in her. She was rude, volatile , and had a mean streak to her. It took all your will power not to get down on your knees and beg Peter to break up with her. Not even because you were in love with him, which was Ned’s running theory, but because he wasn’t happy. You weren’t blind to the look he got on his face when she came around. Not to mention that he came back from hanging out with her looking sadder and more worn down than before. Peter didn’t like to talk about his relationship much and you didn’t understand until one night when he came to your room for patching up.

“They got you pretty good tonight, didn’t they?” You chuckled softly as you dabbed hydrogen peroxide on Peters busted lip. He had come to you for repairs before since he lived across the street and you were usually able to joke around about how neat up he had gotten. Tonight, the misty look in his eyes told you he wasn’t in the mood for joking.

“Something like that.” Peter smiled sadly, winching a little when you blew on his cut.

“Sorry.” You spoke softly and looked in his eyes. You could see the redness surrounding his eyelids and put your supplies down. “What happened tonight?”

“I got my confidence shaken pretty badly.” Peter shrugged and refused to meet your eyes.

“Maybe you should tell Lorina about your double life.” You suggested. “I can always patch you up but I can’t exactly kiss it better.”

As much as you disliked his girlfriend, and the fact that he had a girlfriend in the first place, you knew there were some things only a girlfriend could fix. You couldn’t take Peter into your arms and comfort him the way she could. Peter shook his head and looked up at you with tears in his eyes.

“I don’t think I’m where I’m supposed to be.” His voice cracked and you immediately wrapped your arms around him. You held him against your tummy and stroked his hair to soothe him.

“What do you mean?” You asked.

“She won’t let me be.” He cried and buried his face in your shirt.

“Lorina?”

“We fight all the time.” He sniffled. “I feel like I can’t grow as long as I’m with her. She’s keeping me in one place and I don’t want to be there anymore.”

“Can’t you just break up with her?” You thought the solution was obvious.

“I tried but,” he shrugged in misery, “she said I was all she had. She started freaking out and saying she-“

“Shhh.” You cut him off when you saw how worked up he was getting. “It’s okay. I understand.”

“That’s not even that half of it.” He whimpered and your face twisted in confusion.

“What do you mean?” You wondered.

“I can’t tell you.” He began to cry again. “I’m sorry.”

You looked out your window, deep in thought as you comforted Peter. Something about his relationship wasn’t right but you didn’t want to push him for information when he was already upset. You let him lay down on your bed and rubbed his back until he fell asleep. Sleep was a stranger to you that night as you laid awake, wondering what Lorina had done to make him that upset.

“Ugh! Peter totally bailed on me again.” Lorina’s voice snapped you out of your daydream of that night with Peter. “How many times he can forget he has a science project due the next day?”

You gave her a fake smile and cursed Peter briefly for leaving you alone with her. You knew he had to run off on an unexpected Spider-Man escapade, but Lorina didn’t know that.

Or need to know.

“Thats Peter for you. You’re gonna have to get used to that.” You told her with false sympathy and began to walk towards your apartment.

“Whatever.” She grumbled and eyed you’re for a moment. “What about you? Do you want to hang out?”

You stopped in your tracks and shut your eyes tightly as she asked exactly what you didn’t want her to ask.

“Oh, that’s okay.” You turned around and gave her a tight smile.

“No, I think we should.” She was blind to your indifference. “Peter wants us to be friends, anyway.”

“Sure. Why not?” You reluctantly agreed and followed her in the opposite direction. She began to describe a fight she got into with a teacher while you half listened. The more time you spent with her, the less you understood what Peter saw in her. When she began to curse out a teacher you always liked, you fully tuned her out. Your attention shifted to a child crying outside of a jewelry store. He was looking around and unattended, giving the impression that he was lost.

“I’ll be right back.” You told Lorina and walked over to the little kid.

“Whatever.” She mumbled, not bothering to look up from her phone as she took a seat outside a bakery.

You jogged across the street and knelt down in front of the little kid.

“Hey, buddy.” You gave him a gentle smile. “Need some help?”

It didn’t take long for him to dial his moms number and tell her where he was. Frankly, you wish it took longer. His mother came back in no time and gave you a grateful smile as she hugged her son. You smiled at the family and went back to Lorina across the street.

“Who was that?” Lorina cocked an eyebrow at the child and his mom who were now walking away.

��I don’t know.” You shrugged and sat back down. “He couldn’t find his mom so I let him use my phone.”

“You let a random little kid touch your phone?” She asked in disgust.

“Of course, he was lost.” You said simply. “Plus, I love kids so it didn’t bother me.”

“I hate little kids.” Lorina laughed and sunk back in her chair. “My sister ran over my foot with her bike last year and totally broke like half my toes. I started hitting her and my stupid neighbors called the police. They didn’t even care that she started it.”

You looked to the side to shield your shocked expression and quickly composed yourself.

“Oh, wow.” You squeaked out and cleared your throat. You looked am back at her with hope that she was joining but her face was completely serious.

“It was the literally the stupidest thing.” She rolled her eyes. “I had to go to these like, court ordered anger management classes for a year. Can you believe that?”

“No, I can’t.” You answered honestly. You wondered if Peter knew about her anger issues and feared for him if he did.

“It’s whatever. It was that or jail, so.” She shrugged like normal people had to decided between court ordered classes or jail. You laughed awkwardly and tried to think in excuse to get away from this girl.

“What happened to your sister?” You asked, already anxious for her response.

“She was such a baby about. My dad totally took her side and moved out. I don’t care though. I’m much happier without her.” She scoffed and went back to texting.

“I’m sorry about your dad moving out.” You tried to show sympathy. “Do you miss him?”

“Please.” She laughed at your words. “He hated me ever since I broke my little sisters arm. And that was like, three years ago and he still couldn’t let it go. It was her fault that time too. I told her if she went in my room one more time I was gonna twist her arm and literally the next day I find her in my room.”

“So what happened?”

“I did what I said.” She stated. “I twisted her arm but she was like 6 so it broke and I had to get removed from the house for three days. God, I hate that brat.”

You stared at her in bewilderment but she was too busy texting to notice. You got a sick feeling in your stomach as you thought back to your conversation with Peter. Was this what he meant by not being able to tell you the half of it?

“Does Peter know about this?” You asked quietly, praying he had no idea about her violent streak.

“No. You don’t tell your boyfriend these things. It’s not like he ever talks to me anyway. He’s always hanging out with you.” She gave you the side eye and you didn’t know if you should be relieved just yet. Just because he didn’t know about her past doesn’t mean he hadn’t experienced her present.

“Sorry about that.” You said sheepishly. “You guys hung out last night though, right?”

“Yeah. We had a fight though. But I think I fixed the problem. He’s not gonna mess up again.” She said with a confidence that sent a chill down your spine.

“I’m glad you guys could work it out.” You said with a dry mouth. Your eyes drifted down to her knuckles, which were red and bruised. She saw you staring and pulled her hands into her sleeves so you couldn’t see them anymore. You quickly looked away and pretended not to notice, but you couldn’t get the image out of your mind. Something inside you told you it was time to leave.

“I gotta go.” You stood up abruptly and gave her a fake sad face. “I forgot I have a…science project.” You hoped she wouldn’t pick up on the fact that you and Peter used the same excuse when lying, but her face told you that she did.

“Uh, sure. Go nuts.” She rolled her eyes and you took that as your cue to leave. As soon as you had your back to her, your face twisted in fear. Something was going on that Peter sent telling you about. And if he wasn’t gonna tell you, you were gonna get it out of him.

“How was patrol last night?” You started your plan to get the truth out of Peter off slowly. He was hanging out with you Sunday night since he had been with Lorina Saturday night. He had to work out a schedule early in his relationship to make sure he had time to see both his girls.

He just hated the days that weren’t spent with you.

“I didn’t go out last night.” He told you. “Lorina was feeling a little neglected so I hung out with her. She told me you two hung out the other day, though.”

“Oh yeah. After school.” You thought back to your time with his girlfriend and shuddered. “She’s uh…interesting.”

“I’m glad you guys get along.” He smiled slightly and you caught sight of a forming bruise on the side of his face. You hadn’t noticed it until he turned his face into the light, and now it was all you could see.

“Hey.” You squinted your eyes and took Peters chin between your fingers. “Your eye is bruised.”

“Is it?” He touched it and winced. “Must’ve happened on patrol.”

“I thought you skipped patrol to hang out with Lorina?” You furrowed your eyebrows.

“Oh, right.” His face faltered. “I went on patrol after.”

“I didn’t see you on the news.” You tilted your head. You could always count on a Spider-Man sighting on the cover of a magazine the morning after patrol but hadn’t seen one that morning.

“It was a quiet night.” He lied and looked away from you.

“It was a quiet l night but you have a black eye?” You asked and the sick feeling returned to your tummy.

“Haha, yeah.” He scratched the back of his head. “Some guy punched me pretty hard.”

When he moved, his sleeve slid up his arm and you could see deep red scratches on his skin. You took his arm and inspected it closely. You had accidentally stretched yourself enough times to know what caused them.

“These are nail marks.” You looked up at him for answers. Little flakes of red nail polish were still lingering on his skin. Peter pulled his arm away and cradled it.

“She grabbed my arm pretty hard, too.” He said with a flushed face.

“I thought you said it was a guy?” You caught his slip up and Peters eyes widened in a panic. You could see him struggling to get his story straight and it only worried you further.

“It was dark. I couldn’t really tell.” He stammered. You knew Peter well enough to know when he was lying. The alternative to him getting beaten on patrol was almost too much for you to process.

“You’re bruised, Peter. What happened?” You whispered as tears came to your eyes. “I know you weren’t on patrol last night.”

“Yes, I was.” He insisted but you couldn’t believe him. You knew who gave him those bruises.

“You’re lying to me.” You protested. “Since when do you lie to me?”

“I’m not lying. I was on patrol.” He repeated with desperation. His eyes pleaded with you to drop it but you just couldn’t. You coudk the stand by and let it happen.

“That’s bullshit and you know it.” You snapped and gently touched his black eye. You rubbed your thumb over the bruise as delicately as you could and thought back to Lorina’s red knuckles. Peter could see the wheels turning in your brain and white hit fear went through him.

“Did she do this?” You whispered and Peter flinched slightly.

“Who?” Peter pretended not to know what you were talking about.

“Lorina.”

Peters face told you everything you needed to know. For a minute, he was a different person. Your typically smart and strong best friend became a pale, submissive shell of a man at the mention of her name. It was like she was in the room with you, solentikg tormenting a defenseless Peter. You could see the fear in his eyes when you said her name and it confirmed your worst nightmare.

She was abusing him.

Peter let out a few shaky breaths as he composed himself before shaking his head.

“What? Are you crazy? Why would my girlfriend hit me?” He licked his dry lips and tried to think of a better excuse.

“For the same reason she had to go to her court ordered anger management classes. She obviously had a problem with violence, Peter.” You began to cry as Peter continued to defend his abuser. You drew your hands away from his face and ran to his bathroom, puking in toilet as the sickness in your stomach finally caught up to you. You wiped your mouth and went back to Peter, who was holding himself like a child trembling. You walked up to him and said nothing, only staring him down until he confessed.

“Lorina would never hit me.” He said quietly and turned away from you. Your blood heated up inside you and he continued to lie his way out of admitting what was really going on.

“Why are you protecting her?” You yelled and Peter wiped around with a rage behind his eyes.

“Because I don’t know what to do!” He screamed and his face contorted in misery as he began to sob. “I don’t know what to do.”

You watched your best friend break down before taking him into your arms. He cried on your shoulder as you stroked his hair, in tears yourself.

“Peter…” You mumbled and pressed a sorrowful kiss to his head. Peters body shook against yours as he let out the tears he had been holding in. He pulled away after a minute and you were able to wipe his tears with your hands.

“How long has this been going on?” You asked gently as you handed him a tissue.

“She smacked me a few weeks into our relationship and she swore it would never happen again.” He sniffled.

“But it did, didn’t it?”

“Almost everyday. She just gets so mad all the time.” His voice cracked and you pulled him into another hug. “It’s never even over something I did. If she got a bad grade or got yelled at by a teacher, she takes it out on me. What did I do wrong?”

You pulled away and held his face between your hands.

“You didn’t do anything wrong.” You assured him. “People like her don’t need a reason to be violent. They just are. This isn’t your fault.”

“It feels like it is.” He shrugged sadly. “If I was a better boyfriend-“

“Stop that.” You cut him off. “Don’t make excuses for her. She’s an abuser. There is nothing you did or didn’t do that made her hurt you. She would’ve done this regardless.”

“I just feel so stupid.” He whimpered. “She’s always so apologetic after she hits me, and I always forgive her. I keep believing her when she says it won’t happen again, and then it does happen again and I feel like an idiot.”

“You’re not an idiot. This is not your fault.” You swore. Peters bottom lip trembled as he searched your face, latching onto you for much needed comfort.

“I don’t know how to handle this.” He shook his head. “There’s no advice for men online. No one thinks we can be the victims too.”

“I’m so sorry, Peter. I believe you.” You pulled him down on the bed and held him close. He rested his head over your heartbeat and let you play with his hair. You couldn’t heal him, but you could remind him how it felt to be loved.

“Thank you.” He mumbled in appreciation as he leaned into your touch. He could already feel himself relaxing with you.

“Has she ever made you bleed?” You wondered as you untangled a knot in his curls.

“It’s rare, but it happened a few times.” He told you. “It’s strange; when it runs into your mouth, it’s almost…sweet.”

You didn’t know what to say, not trusting your voice to be steady if you tried to speak. It killed you that Peter has endured the abuse for so long and you felt almost ashamed for not realizing he needed help sooner.

“I could hurt her.” He said suddenly. “I could hurt her with half the force she uses against me. I know that.”

“But you don’t.”

“And I never would.” He confirmed.

“I’d never expect you too. It takes a big man to have the power you have and not fight back.” You looked down at him from your position. He gave you a sad smile before looking away.

“Then why do I feel so weak?” He asked timidly.

“You’re not weak. Shes just weighing you down.” You shook your head, angry at the thought of her. A silence settled in your room, the only sounds coming from your breathing.

“Why do you stay?” You asked suddenly. You couldn’t understand how a boy as smart as Peter could stay in a relationship that was so obviously toxic.

“There was this study that if you put frogs in boiling water, they’ll jump right out. But if you put a frog in warm water and slowly raise it to a boil, it’ll stay there until it dies. That’s what an abusive relationship is like.” Peter said slowly. “She slowly raised the temperature and now I’m…”

“Dying?” You finished his sentence for him and held him tighter. “I don’t want you to stay until you die. You deserve so much better.”

“Maybe I don’t deserve better. It’s not like over ever been given better. Maybe I’m getting exactly what I deserve.” Peter spoke softly, making you sit up. You climbed on top of him and pinned him to the mattress.

“Don’t say that, okay?” You demanded as your nose almost touched Peter’s. “That’s her talking. You have value that she can’t never take away. You deserve everything good in this world. I never want to hear you say that again.”

Peter breathed heavily as he looked up at you with a pink blush on his face. You became aware of your position and rolled off of him, laying next to him on the bed.

“Thanks.” He said breathlessly as you both stared at the ceiling.

“You’re welcome.” You rolled onto your side and looked at Peter. “I’m here for you, but we can’t fix this on our own. We need to tell an adult.”

“If I tell people, everyones gonna laugh at me for not fighting back.” Peter pointed out.

“No smart person would laugh at someone strong enough to take abuse this long.” You insisted. “You’re brave for not fighting back.”

“You think?” He smiled shyly at you. You smiled back and wrapped an arm around his torso.

“I know.”

You spotted Lorina the next day in the courtyard, face once again buried in her phone. The principle was busy calling her parents to let her know she was no longer welcomed back at Midtown Tech. She assured you and Peter that she would call the police as soon as she contacted Lorina’s parents, but you still wanted to take matters into your own hands. You wanted to give her a going away present before she left yours and Peters life forever.

“Hey, Lorina.” You walked up to her with a big smile.

“Oh, hi Y/n.” She said without looking up.

“Peter looked pretty beat up today.” You commented and leaned against the wall. She looked up from her phone with an annoyed expression and gave you a once over.

“Look, I don’t know what he told you but-“

“He didn’t tell me anything.” You cut her off and stepped closer to her. “Even covered in your bruises, he protected you. I just figured it out.”

“Couples fight. You wouldn’t know.” She sassed you and tried to go back to her phone. You pushed her phone down and stepped in front of her to gain her full attention.

“Couples fight with their words, not their fists.” You caged her between your arms and got in her face. “And from what I understand, your fights are always one sided.”

“It’s not my fault if he can’t be a man and defend himself.” She stepped up to you with a fire in her eyes.

“Peter would never hit you because he’s a boy. But guess what?” You asked as you cracked your knuckles.

“What?” She raised an unamused eyebrow.

“I’m not a boy.” You quipped before your first collided with her face.

I know it’s not always gonna end like this. You’re not always gonna get to punch your abuser in the face and walk free. I just hit 5k followers. That’s 5k people who need to be educated on this. I wanted to shed some light on this topic since I have a platform that allows me to. 1 in 4 men and 1 in 3 women will experience domestic abuse in some way in their lives. If you or someone you know is experiencing this, help is out there.

National Domestic Abuse Hotline: 1−800−799−7233

National Domestic Violence Hotline

Tips

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isthisthingeven0n · 4 years

Text

protective : a.h

you’re still the newest member to the BAU eventhough you’ve been there a year, but that doesn’t mean hotch isn’t always looking out for you (2.2K)

* also i have an etsy shop where i sell some criminal minds tote bags and prints. if you wanna check it out i’ll leave the link here

“Reid, go left with JJ. Rossi, Morgan, take the right entrance. Y/L/N, with me.” Hotch orders and everyone nods, knowing it was a time-sensitive situation.

Following behind Hotch, you could already hear the screams and cries of agony from Alisia Hartnell, the unsubs latest victim whom he kidnapped three days ago.

You’d all been following the case since the first and second victims were found in the local park tied to trees. Both were prostitutes and still alive due to their organs being held in place by pieces of rope wrapped around the tree. You all knew they would either die slowly if you leave them, delirious and without any relief or someone would try and help them.

None of the unsub’s victims had lived long enough to be saved or help your case until you had a breakthrough hours prior with Garcia’s help.

“You alright?” Hotch quietly asks as you trail behind him, gun at the ready.

Despite the fact you had been with the BAU for just under a year now, you were still the newest member of the team and treated as so by some members. You clicked with Spencer immediately, partly due to your enthusiasm towards Doctor Who and the similarity in age. Garcia warmed to you once she had done her background check on you, only to find the last videos in your search history being ‘cute animals being clumsy for five minutes straight.’

And well, there is your section chief, your boss; Hotch. You knew he was looking out for you, as all the team as you’re all one big family.

Hotch warmed to you but didn’t always show it. He was firm, rarely smiled but was considerate to all of you. If there was any problem, he wanted to know and took the time to listen, even if it were after hours and he had a mountain of paperwork to complete.

What you didn’t know was that Hotch liked you, more than a member of the BAU.

“I’m fine, just want to get this son of a bitch.” You mutter in response, unaware of the smile glimpsing on Hotch’s face before his stoic expression returns as you both turn the corner, the echoed screams becoming more prominent.

Glancing over his shoulder, Hotch ensures you’re behind him as he gives you the signal.

You take the left side of the door whilst he covers the right, entering swiftly as you cover all bases of the room. “It’s clear.” You tell Hotch as you lower your gun momentarily, looking at the photos of the victims on the walls, smeared with blood. “God,” You sigh as Hotch moves closer.

Lining the walls are photographs containing the victims prior to the mutilation and torture to them that resulted in being tied to those trees. “He’s been watching us.” Hotch reaffirms his suspicion, knowing the unsub was a sadist and narcissist who got off seeing his work being seen and in a twisted sense, admired.

“That’s not all,” You speak up as you turn around, seeing jars kept on display filled with various organs. “so that’s why they couldn’t find the right kidney.” You lift your flashlight up, the unsub is keeping treasures from his victims, he’s as sadistic as you thought. “He must be here somewhere.”

“We’re clear, do any of you have eyes on him?” Hotch speaks into his earpiece whilst you look around the room further.

Whilst Hotch awaits a response, you hear a muffled cry beneath you. “Hotch?” You whisper before bending down to the floor with your gun in position.

Turning around, Hotch keeps his gun aimed on the floor as you tap the plank of wood. “It’s hollow.” You mouth and Hotch nods as you stand back up whilst Hotch moves the rug concealing the next plank of wood, revealing a hinge.

“Stay alert.” Hotch sternly tells you as he lifts the three connected planks of wood, hitting the shelving of jars as they smash to the ground.

There’s no time to react as you follow Hotch down the steps into the concealed basement. You survey the room as does Hotch with your flashlights, seeing glimpses of weapons and surgical equipment, but no sign of Alisia.

“Hotch, is that-” Before you can finish your sentence, a pair of arms wrap around you. One is secured over your mouth as your gun falls to the ground whilst the other holds a gun to your head.

“Don’t do anything stupid,” Hotch states as he holds his gun up to the unsubs head, trying not to focus on your wide eyes as you struggle in the unsub’s grip.

“Why, you want this one safe, huh? Well, this city wanted the other girls safe, look where that lead them.” He spits out with a short laugh causing your stomach to turn.

“There’s no way out of this, so let her go.” Hotch remains calm as you lower your gaze, trying to hold back tears knowing your likelihood out of this is close to 60/40; Hotch has a precise aim, but there’s a gun against your head and the trigger could be pulled before Hotch has a chance to shoot.

If Reid were here, he could give you the exact statistic of you making it out. He’d be able to time it all out, but you didn’t want to focus on that as the gun was pressed further against your temple and the unsub’s breathing was getting heavier against your skin.

“I could go many ways,” The unsub taunts as he drags you backwards, a muffled whimper leaving your lips as Hotch tries to remain focused on the unsub, ignoring the tears forming in your eyes. “a full shoot out, but then you’d never find the last girl.” He tutted, quickly followed by a short laugh that sent a shiver through your body.

“No one has to die, we can talk about this.” Hotch seethes through his teeth, glancing down for a split second to see you pointing down to the unsub’s foot as you move your own away, hoping Hotch would get the message.

Shaking his head, the unsub looks back to you. Moving his hand off of your mouth, you gasp for breath as he begins to stroke your hair. “You’re prettier than the others,” He chuckles as you try to move from his hold, but he grips your hair, pulling your head back. “just think what I can do with you.” He whispers, and at that moment whilst the unsub’s focus is on you, Hotch fires directly to the unsub’s leg.

A loud scream follows as the unsub releases you, giving you time to grab your gun as you shoot at his arm.

But you’re not fast enough as a shot is fired by the unsub, hitting you in the arm. You bite back a cry, knowing the unsub is not done and won’t go down easy.

Hotch then fires one more time, shooting the unsub in his other leg which sends him to the ground, dropping his gun aside.

Resting his foot on the unsub’s back, Hotch looks over to you as he holds the handcuffs. “Do you want to do the honours?” He tries to disguise the humour in his tone as you smile, but Hotch can tell it’s insincere.

You can’t help but look down at the unsub who is laughing at you. “Go ahead,” You tell Hotch as you step aside, allowing him to lead the cuffed unsub up the stairs of the basement where the rest of the team is awaiting the three of you.

Once you’re all outside, you cross your arms over your chest to cradle your left arm as you watch the police car with the unsub drive away whilst Alisia is sitting in the back of an ambulance, badly injured, but alive nonetheless.

“So, Hotch shot the unsub three times?” Reid speaks up, and your focus shifts to Spencer as Hotch nods. “But I heard four shots.” Spencer states.

Now Hotch tenses as he turns to face you, noticing your lack of engagement despite how eager you were to find Alisia alive, yet you’ve barely spoken two words since you got out of the basement.

“Y/n?” Hotch moves aside as you follow him, hearing mutters from the team teasing you about being in trouble.

Placing his hand on your left arm, he sadly doesn’t miss the wince that leaves your lips or the split second your eyes widen.

“What’s wrong?” Hotch’s tone becomes quieter, but more pressing, nonetheless.

A small sigh sounds from you as Hotch looks down to his fingertips, seeing they’re coated in crimson.

“He shot me, but it’s nothing serious, Hotch, the bullet isn’t lodged.” You explain, trying to shrug it off, but Hotch’s expression tells you that isn’t happening.

Without saying anything else, Hotch rests his hand on your right arm, guiding you to the nearest ambulance, not giving you the chance to protest. “She’s been shot in the arm.” He states, like you’re a student being punished and having to face the consequences.

Sitting down in the ambulance, you hold back the cry in your throat as the medic cuts away the fabric covering your arm whilst Hotch walks away, back to the team.

You can make out him saying something, and Reid’s eyes widen as he looks over to you, resulting in you giving them all a weak wave that causes Rossi to chuckle.

“Head on back to the station, I’ll wait here until Y/n has been cleared.” Hotch states, and the team disperse into cars, all except Rossi.

“You’re more smitten than a kitten who got the cream, Aaron.” Rossi jokes, glancing over Hotch’s shoulder to see you with your head down, your right hand gripping the edge of the stretcher that you’re sat on as the medic stitches your arm.

Hotch shakes his head. “It’s not like that, Dave.” Hotch insists, but Rossi is one of the best profiler’s he knows, so it doesn’t take more than a second to detect the lie. “I can’t say or do anything, I’m her superior and you know how Erin would react.”

“Leave Erin to me,” Rossi comments before patting Hotch on the shoulder. “don’t let her slip through your grasp.”

Walking away, Hotch turns around to see you now beginning to stand up as the medic nods to you.

“All clear?” Hotch questions as you snap your head up, ignoring your vision blurring as three stern faces greet you, slowly morphing back into one.

Blinking rapidly, you nod. “Medic stitched me up, just gotta take it easy for a week or so.” You smile, but the frown on Hotch’s face refuses to soften. “Do you want to lecture me now or when we’re back in Quantico?” You ask as you rock back and forth on your heels.

A slither of a smile crosses Hotch’s face before he clears his throat. “Y/n, you have to remember we’re a team here. You getting injured in the field does matter, and you can’t always shrug it off. What if things went differently? You could’ve died in that basement, and I would’ve had to live with that. I’d be the one to tell your family, I’d be the mourning you and regret everyday never telling you the truth.” Hotch explains as you nod along and then pausing at the end of his explanation.

“I know I acted out of line, Hotch. But I just don’t know or like showing weakness.” You admit as you fiddle with the hem of your shirt, your vest now put to one side. “Especially around you.” You mutter before lifting your gaze up to meet his as Hotch shuffles his weight from one foot to the other.

Raising a brow, Hotch takes a step closer towards you. “What’re you trying to say, Y/L/N?”

“You’re going to make me say it?” You feign annoyance as a grin spreads across your face, unaware of the frost around Hotch’s heart beginning to melt at the sight.

Hotch shakes his head. “Only when you’re ready,” He tells you. “come on, we should get going.” He motions towards one SUV remaining whilst the police department carry on with their assessment.

Unsure of himself, Hotch swallows his fears as he rests his arm around you. He keeps his eyes fixated on the car but internally warms as you move closer into his embrace.

“Does this mean I won’t be allowed on the field for a while?” You ask as you slide into the back seat next to Hotch who chuckles, something that’ll take some getting used to seeing.

As he fastens his seatbelt, he reaches to help you with yours, only to see you have done it already despite the sling on your arm.

“We’ll talk about that when we’re back in Quantico, Y/n.” He tells you quietly, seeing your eyes beginning to droop. “Take a nap, I’ll let you know when we’re almost there.” Hotch mutters as you try to fight the tiredness as the adrenaline rush is leaving your system.

A small yawn leaves your lips as you rest your head on Hotch’s shoulder. “Thanks, Hotch.” You glance up to him.

“Aaron,” Hotch mutters. “call me Aaron.”

“Okay,” You whisper as your hand reaches for his, squeezing it ever so gently. “thank you, Aaron.” You add before closing your eyes, missing the sight of a bright smile you’ll soon see plenty of.

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softcallofdutyimagines · 3 years

Text

More Then a Woman | Frank Woods x Fem!Reader | Chapter 1

Summary:

Another day, another dollar at your new job in the CIA offices. You thought this was your dream job. So why is everything so... Boring? But before you can make up your mind to quit, a chance encounter with a certain Marine may just prove to be the start of exactly the kind of excitement you've been looking for.

Tags: Slow burn

Next Chapter Here! | Warnings: None except Frank's language lmao

You smooth your skirt and touch up your lipstick for what feels like the tenth time today as you shift in your office chair. It’s not normally like you to be the nervous type, but ever since you landed this gig in the CIA, you’ve been on your toes. ‘Relax’, your coworkers say, ‘You’re doing fine!’.

But just ‘fine’ never quite suited you. Especially with top tier agents like Russell Adler and Jason Hudson walking around…

No, “fine” doesn’t cut it.

But... you have to admit, the stress of keeping up a tough work ethic is getting to you. Just a bit. All the hustle and bustle in this place, and for what? You shake your head out. No no, there’s no time for thoughts like that. You just have to keep pushing through and you’ll get over it.

Right?

You sigh in dismay, not entirely sure you believe yourself, before snapping to attention as your desk phone rings. With a curt response, you pick up and receive yet another task to fetch papers.

“Yes Sir”

... and a coffee.

“...Of course, Sir”.

You click the phone into its receiver and slump back into your chair, feeling more defeated now then ever.

If you wanted to run around doing errands all day, you would’ve moved back in with your mother. When were you going to get up to something… Exciting? Maybe not in the dangerous, life threatening way, but… Well… Anything must be better than this.

These thoughts swirl in your mind to and from the fax machine, to the break room, and all the way to your supervisor's desk.

“Anything else for me Sir?”

The man in question hardly even gives you a second look as he shuffles through the papers and sips the piping hot drink, “No, that’ll b- Wait, actually…”, he turns around in his office chair and flips quickly through folders in a filing cabinet.

At last, he turns around and hands you one such folder as you bite back a scream. “Could you fax these off for me?”, he scribbles down the receiving address on a post it note and slaps it on top, “Send em here, here, and here”.

You give a sharp nod and a “Yes Sir”, before turning and leaving on a dime.

The skin around your eyes and throat feel tight, and if you didn’t know better, you’d think you were on the brink of tears. Who are you kidding…. This isn’t at all what you were expecting. Maybe you’d be better off looking for something else, at least then you wouldn’t be so miserable all the ti-

Then, just as you’re lost in your day dreams, you next find yourself flat on the carpeted floor.

Your papers scatter all around, and it has just now occurred to you that you’ve bounced off another human being. Perhaps you should save the disparaging thoughts for your office from now on... Well, assuming you aren’t about to be fired on the spot.

For a moment, that doesn’t seem like such a bad idea, and you decide to take your time sitting up.

“Oh fuck, sorry”

You look up, following the sound of a gruff man’s voice.

Marine Sergeant Frank Woods towers above you, looking almost as powerful in this moment and from your unfortunate perspective as all the stories make him out to be. Your heart races in your chest as it gives way to panic. Now you’re really in for it.

“Oh! N-no, I’m so sorry, I uh- I should watch where I’m going”, you spit out an apology and an excuse all in one go as you maneuver quickly to pick up your scattered array of papers.

Frank watches you for a moment, mildly disinterested, and looking as though he’s about to shrug it off and walk away. You are right after all, you should watch where you're going. But then again... he could say the same for himself.

“Ah, don’t sweat it kid. Here”, Woods slowly leans down, perhaps giving his knees a chance to adjust from the previous lack of activity, and helps you gather up your things.

You appreciate the help, but can’t help but cringe a bit as you watch him grab the papers by the fistful, crinkling them slightly. Regardless, he shuffles the papers into a uniform stack before flicking his gaze back up to you, “Ther- Hey, wait a minute… Haven't I seen you around here before?”

You think for a split second, but you’re quite sure he hasn’t.

“No no, I have! Yeah, you’re the one that walks around looking pissed all the time”, he laughs, “Damn, I gotta say, you scare the shit outta me even! No wonder these bastard’s brought you on”.

Before you can even catch up to what he's saying, he has himself nearly in stitches laughing at your expense.

The urge comes over you to retort that there are plenty of legitimate reasons you were hired, and, more importantly, you are not “pissed all the time”, but before you can even open your mouth, you find you’ve lost your train of thought.

No, instead you find yourself immensely distracted by the Sargent’s laugh. Not so much the fact that he’s having the time of his life at your expense, but more so just… the sound of it.

It comes more like long, drawn out wheezes, only interrupted by gasps of air that sounds more like choking, before devolving into something more steady at least, but just as strange. You could only describe it as somewhere between grunting and barking. From this alone, you can tell he smokes too much and perhaps isn’t use to laughing this hard either.

What that says about you, you’d rather not think about. Instead, you find your mask of professionalism slipping as the corner of your glossy lips curls up into a smile.

You never thought such annoying, and obnoxious laughter could be contagious, and yet here you are trying, yet failing, to hold back some snickering of your own.

“Ah, shit…”, Woods drags his forearm across his eyes to dry them before fixing his gaze back on you, “You know... I think that is the happiest I’ve ever seen you around here. Is this place that shitty?”, he hands you back your papers at last as the creases at the corners of his eye furrow in mirth.

For a second, you’re worried he’s about to break into laughter again as he’s sure to drag you along with him this time, but instead he simply waits quietly, and you get the feeling he expects an answer.

“Well… Not in those words perhaps. It’s just, not what I expected I guess...”, you look away, not to sure what to say and yet feeling a little sadly now, as you shuffle the papers together and neatly place the crumpled stack back in the folder.

“Yeah, I get that… Heh, I wish I could be out in the field right now, you know? I mean fuck, there must be someone who needs killing, right?”, Woods huffs a few dry chuckles, looking at you as though he expects you to laugh.

You do not.

Instead, you offer an awkward smile and nod, not sure how to respond to such a grisly statement. Let alone one that’s meant to be taken as a joke. Woods coughs into his fist, then goes to stand abruptly.

“Anyway, I have shit to do”, he waits a just a moment in politeness until you’re standing as well before giving his final parting statement, “Later”

“Ahem, goodbye Sarg-”, but it’s too late, he’s already trudging off.

You blink, feeling bewildered at the twists and turns that interaction had to offer. Fortunately, you have more important matters to attend to as well, rather than let yourself be distracted by… whatever that was.

Suddenly you remember why you dislike working with the frontline troops.

Frank’s blood pressure feels like it’s going to explode through the top of his head. His knuckles are clenched white as he storms out of the building. Once outside, he stops to take a smoke break.

His head is pounding as he fumbles for a cigarette and then at long last he finally manages to retrieve his lighter as well.

Why the fuck would he say something like that? “there must be someone who needs killing”, yeah real smooth Frank, what a line...

He flicks the lighter spark again and again, but it refuses to catch. “Fuck!”, frustration overcomes him as he gives up and shoves it back in his pocket, throwing the unlit cigarette to the ground too for good measure.

That was the longest interaction he’s had with a woman in… in…

Well, he can’t even remember! And yet, he still managed to fuck it up.

Woods slams the door of his car shut behind him and takes a moment to cool off there in the seat.

You must think he’s some kind of psychopath.

Frank catches his reflection in the rearview mirror. If Mason was here, he’d say you’d be right. He jerks the mirror away so he can’t see himself anymore. Bastard. He snorts out a sigh and rubs a hand over his eyes as he tries to let the embarrassment go.

He needs a drink.

The ignition whines and after a few tries it finally starts up. Ah well, he reasons, maybe if he’s lucky he won’t see you again.

#call of duty #black ops cold war #frank woods #frank woods x reader #cod fic

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am-imagines · 4 years

Text

Forever//Over. - Alex Morgan Imagine.

This was requested by an anon: Maybe some really angsts long distance relationship but with a fluffy ending.

I took a different approach with this prompt than what you’d probably expect, but I hope it’s angsty and enjoyable enough. I ran away with it and the over 6k words prove it. If it’s as angsty as it can be, I don’t know. You must want to ask @worms-and-jan She knows my angst-meter better than myself. But hey! It has a fluffy ending! Kinda.

I hope y’all enjoy!

***

You never believed that loving too much could hurt like this. You never longed for someone until air escaped your grasp and you weren’t able to breathe. And yet, here you are.

The darkness consumes you like a thousand questions you can’t answer. The walls of your room almost collapse over you and you need to get out of there. It doesn’t matter where as long as you’re not there: in the place that reminds you so fervently of the person you’re trying to forget.

The salty air of the beach helps you calm down; you breathe in and out but that doesn’t stop the deep ache in your chest. The music blares through your headphones; loud and yet unable to drown the cruel, mocking voice of your doubts.

The sky is dark, full of stars in the quiet autumn evening. And perhaps you’re not completely alone with the night sky watching over you even if the moon is missing. Even if she’s missing. You really want to believe it’s better this way, but it still hurts like hell.

You’ve called and texted her perhaps a thousand times since she disappeared from your life. And that’s the thing you can’t understand. How can the same person that proclaimed her love just turn her back on you like that? She was gone without a word or warning. It makes no sense no matter how much you think about it.

One day you’re enjoying life, trading kisses and “I love you”s while the world kept spinning. The faint light from the tv was the perfect halo for her beauty. The next day she’s gone. Your worry is met with silence and only a trail of media posts let you know she’s safe.

For so long you’ve believed that love shouldn’t hurt, and if it does, then it’s time to move on. That’s your plan now; put a sea between you while you try to forget.

Except you’ve never been good at that. You don’t fall in love often, but when you do then it’s the all or nothing kinda love. Sure, you’re willing and accepting of letting go when love dies, when the timing is right and when a relationship becomes full of bullshit. But here, everything is different and you’re not quite sure how to let go.

Hence why you’re at the beach; trying to figure out how you messed up, where things went wrong for Alex Morgan to stop loving you so abruptly.

Maybe, just maybe, this isn’t your fault at all.

That, however, would make her a fucking asshole. And that’s a tag you’re not ready to pin on her just yet. After all, you love her too much.

Still, there’s a party you must attend in less than an hour. You have a chance to be with the National Team, say your goodbye for the near future. And you gotta put the last period on a love story she can’t give you.

Next week your life starts in Europe; you have a club, a place and a dream to chase.

Sadly, there’s a missing piece in the puzzle you envisioned as your future. But her prolonged silence is a hint that you must reconstruct yourself and find another version of yourself. All in all, it’s better to move on now. Sure, the pain is there but won’t last forever.

Making the decision to leave wasn’t easy. You’re grateful for the chance the Pride gave you, but with the U.S. Soccer’s approval, you’re ready for a new horizon. There are plenty of challenges overseas that will help you discover a renewed version of yourself.

There are many things you leave behind, but ultimately, there’s nothing for you to stay.

This party is a chance to see your found family until next camp a few months away. Granted, you’re going to miss them terribly, especially Ash and Ali. They’ve practically taken you under their wing in Orlando. In camp you gravitate more towards Tobin and Lindsey as if they were all siblings.

The entire National Team is your family in one way or another. And it helps that some of them have experienced life in other countries before. They know that even with all the hardships of moving to another country; every moment playing soccer there is worth it.

This is an opportunity for growth. Now it’s your chance to discover more about you as an athlete and a human being.

It takes you another moment to collect yourself, to stop panic from overtaking you as you stare into Orlando’s beach one last time. This is the right decision, it has to be. Because right now your only plan is finding your future in Europe, and plan B is pretty much dying by Ashlyn’s hands if you don’t make it to the Harris-Krieger household in time.

The walk back home is quite enjoyable; the evening is warm and you’ve made peace with this, even if you’re not willing to put the blame on Alex. Sometimes things are just not meant to be no matter how hard you try to make them work.

What really works is your outfit as you make it to the party about an hour later. The music is already going, alcohol flowing and twenty three other women are causing havoc already. It’s twenty three because of course she would be there. After all, Alex Morgan is part of the National team.

Surprisingly, or maybe not, her presence hurts way more than her absence. It cements the truth you refused to believe; it’s not like she’s too busy to leave you aside, she just doesn’t care. It was far easier to question the darkness of your room than daring to do so when her eyes land on you.

In that moment you want to run away; turn on your heels and escape from all the pain and disappointment. Realization hits hard and deep, it makes your lungs burn all over again and you practically choke on the words you can’t throw at her face.

But this night isn’t about her. She isn’t the only person that matters in the world, not tonight. If she doesn’t care, you’ll pretend not to care either. You can do it for a night. You can do it for forever. Fake it till you make it, right?

“Damn, girl!” Ashlyn calls as she pulls you into a hug. “Looking fine.”

“Watch it, Harris. You’re a married woman now.”

“Excuse you, happily married.”

You nod at her statement because it couldn’t be truer. You’ve never seen a couple look at each other like that. You hope to have what they do one day. Even if it’s not with the person you thought for months. A mistake on your part, perhaps. Maybe one of many.

No. You’re not going to think about her anymore. She’s not going to ruin this night. There’s plenty of girls to keep you company, to laugh with and enjoy your last hours in the country. There are a million stories you haven’t heard yet. Hundreds of dog pictures to be exchanged like trading cards. You enjoy a drink, laugh and dance until you’ve almost forgotten her.

Almost.

Despite your best efforts, you can’t ignore the weight of her gaze for long. Just as you can’t ignore the way she keeps avoiding you even when you’re confined to the same place. You never considered Ash and Ali’s place to be extremely big, and yet Alex is never in the same room you are for long.

The sadness and hurt turn into anger then, and you wonder why the fuck she can’t speak her mind once and for all? She’s a coward.

Still, you’re too tired to keep chasing her, and instead stick by Lindsey and Rose. At least until Ash pulls you into the kitchen with a lame excuse of refilling drinks. That didn’t seem to be a problem thirty seconds ago, but you follow anyway.

You know Ash and Ali maybe as much as they know you. It’s only normal for her to do something like this every so often, either there’s some sort of gossip or a new cocktail you have to try. It’s no big deal.

“Okay, spill. What the fuck is going on with you?”

“What?” You parrot back, utterly confused. “What are you talking about?”

“Y/n, I know you. So don’t start that bullshit with me. You’ve been holed up at your place not talking to anyone since the end of the season. And I know this because everyone has been texting me, concerned that you’re not in a good place. I don’t know what happened between you and Alex, but...”

“Nothing happened!” You finally snap. “Nothing happened.”

Repeating the words doesn’t make them true, and the look on your face is one of defeat. You know it. Ash knows it. And so does Ali when she joins you at the kitchen with a worried look. This is not how things were supposed to go, but now you can’t really backtrack.

“I’m leaving,” you blurt out suddenly.

Except that you make no move towards the door. There’s no way you can drive like this; not when your hands are shaking and your vision is blurred by tears.

“I’ll take you home,” Ali offers; a hand resting on your shoulder.

“No, I...” You hesitate under her gaze, under her touch. It’s now or never, and it’s too soon to say goodbye but you have to start somewhere. “I’m leaving the Pride. I had some offers to play overseas, and I accepted. It’s a chance to start over, you know?”

“I’m going to kill a bitch, or break her legs.”

You gotta laugh at Ash’s words as you wipe the corners of your eyes. Of course she would understand more than you’re actually saying. Ali, well, she looks at her wife frowning in confusion.

“What are you talking about? Break whose legs?”

“There’s only one person that would make her want to lea-”

“No,” you interrupt, “listen. This was my decision, my choice, and only mine.”

“Yeah, sure.”

There are only three people in the entire world you cannot fool no matter how hard you try: Ashlyn Harris, Ali Krieger and Megan Rapinoe.

You’re starting to believe is some sort of superpower from the Lesbian Gods.

For a moment you try to hold eye contact with Pinoe but in the end, the woman quirks an eyebrow and you give up. In all honesty, you never had a chance to win here.

Fuck you, Artemis.

“Okay,” you relent. “She had something to do with it but...”

“What happened?”

The look in their eyes tells you that if you don’t tell them, there won’t be mercy for Alex. And yet, if you talk, you’re not sure if it’ll make things better or worse. There’s no escape from this situation; you’re stuck between a rock and a hard place.

Ash, Ali and Pinoe are the three women you trust the most in the world. You’ve bottled your emotions over the last weeks and it obviously isn’t helping.

You can try. You can pretend. But you still find it hard to breathe. You still feel the world crashing over you while you scramble to find some answer among the rubble. They’re offering support in the best way they can; worried more about you than anything else.

“I...”

But it’s still hard to find your voice and put everything into words. They’ve never been your forte. If you’re searching for a clean slate, then it’s best to leave this behind.

“It’s a long story.”

By the end of it, you’re unable to look at any of them, and stare at the floor instead. There’s a moment of charged silence while their anger grows. You’ve cried enough already; the tears won’t come anymore, but even then your pain is there for them to see.

“Son of a bitch!” Ash yells, banging the counter in anger.

She’s angry with herself for not seeing this earlier, for not reaching out. It isn’t her fault. No matter how good she is detecting your bullshit, you’re good keeping secrets. She can’t see right through you when you don’t let her be close enough.

You would’ve been better at hiding this if it didn’t tear you apart as much as it did. It’s far easier to pretend when your heart isn’t broken. It’s easier to conceal anger under calm, and mask emptiness with a smile.

You never loved so deeply. You never hurt so harshly. It’s just like they say: there’s a first time for everything.

“I’m really going to kill her.”

“No, no. Ali, please.”

You hold her hand, pulling her into a hug she answers by tightening her hold on you. Ash and Pinoe join the love pile not too long after although you can see the tension lingering on their shoulders. You know they’re angry, but you won’t let them act on impulse.

“I don’t want a confrontation, okay? I...it won’t solve anything. Not anymore. I came here to have a good time, not to spend the night talking about her.”

“You need another drink then,” Pinoe says breaking the group hug.

In a matter of seconds there’s a full glass in your hand. The weight pressing down your chest has eased enough for you to breathe normally, for you to smile as bright as ever.

Who needs Alex Morgan when you have this incredible group of women?

“For an epic last night?”

You raise your glass for a toast, but instead of joining your cheer, they glare daggers behind you. Looking back is unnecessary to know who is standing behind you.

“What do you mean last night?”

Thankfully, she’s not the one talking, and you turn to face Kelley instead.

“Europe is calling, baby!” You exclaim cheerfully.

Intentional or not, your voice is loud enough for not just Kelley to hear. Every other girl in the next room hears too. Suddenly, all of them try to make their way into the kitchen; asking as many questions as they can while you try to answer them all.

They’re like an excited pack of puppies, walking you to the living room where anyone left out can join too.

Even among a sea of soccer players, her gaze cuts through it all. She follows you like a distant shadow, but you make your best to ignore her.

She has no right to stop you now. She has no right to act hurt when this is the aftermath of her actions. Everything has a consequence, and if she thought you would wait forever without an explanation, she’s wrong.

“When are you leaving?”

Her words are quiet but you hear them thunderous. They zap you as if they were lightning, and your eyes snap up to meet hers. It’s hard to describe what you see there, then again, you don’t try too hard to understand.

“Next week.”

Just like that, you move onto the next question as if your mind wasn’t troubled.

You laugh with the others showing none of the struggle you’ve gone through. You don’t tell them about the sleepless nights where you wondered what to do next, which direction to follow. You don’t say a word about your phone’s unlit screen and the hundred unanswered texts.

Somehow, when your eyes meet Alex’s again, she has the decency to look ashamed. She knows. She knows and still didn’t give a damn.

“You’re staying, right?” Ali asks once the party starts winding down.

“Until you kick me out.”

The woman huffs in mock annoyance before pinching your cheeks. If that’s the price to pay for her friendship, you’ll take it with only a tiny bit of whining. After all, you have to put up some kind of resistance even if your smile betrays you.

Half an hour later everyone is ready to leave; including Pinoe. She fetches her jacket while they all wait for their Lyft, Uber or whatever service they called.

Megan looks at you and then at the only other person sitting on the other side of the living room. A silent question being asked here:

Are you going to be alright?

You nod, getting to your feet for one last hug.

“I’m going to miss you,” you whisper.

“Why’s that? Phones don’t work over there or what?”

“You’re a fucking asshole.”

“Language,” she admonishes, earning her an eye roll. “Call me, text me and if it’s four am, I’ll respond once I actually wake up.”

“You are officially the worst. But I’ll do my best for you there.”

“Nah. You’ll do your best because that’s how you are. Take care, Y/n. Don’t make me go across the world to kick your butt. You know I will.”

“I promise nothing.”

With that, she’s gone and so are the rest of the girls with one exception. The one exception you don’t want to face. So, while Ash and Ali are getting the guest room ready, you decide to start the cleaning process.

Bypassing Alex, you make your way into the kitchen to load the dishwasher.

The sound of her footsteps is quiet, and yet too loud in the overall silence of the house. You’re between shocked and unsurprised. You wondered if staying behind had anything to do with you, but didn’t want to get your expectations too high.

She hasn’t talked to you in months, what makes this night special?

“You’re leaving.”

Right. That. That’s the big revelation of the night, but doesn’t really make a difference.

“Yes.”

With the dishwasher running, your next step is to gather all the trash scattered around the place. At least that was the plan. Alex has other ideas as she stands in front of you, effectively blocking the door. Sure, you can make your way around the kitchen isle, but you’re not feeling up to play stupid games.

“Why?” She asks.

Isn’t that the same thing you’ve asked yourself endless times? It absolutely is.

The whole thing is so ridiculous that you almost laugh. Except it’s not really funny. In a moment all the hurt turns into burning anger. It boils and swells, rises like the tide when the moon illuminates the sky.

You look at her and don’t recognize the woman you loved not so long ago.

“Why what, Alex?”

There’s a fierceness in your own eyes that is so unlike you. Sure, you’ve been angry before, who hasn’t? But never like this, never to the point of quiet rage.

“Why didn’t you tell me?”

You laugh then; an empty sharp sound that is far away from being happy. It’s the irony of it all, the nerve of Alexandra Morgan to sputter those words acting confused and hurt.

“I fucking tried!” You shout, and once you start everything else comes pouring out. “Or did you forget about the texts you never bothered to answer? Or the calls? I tried to reach you so many times, in so many ways, and you made it clear you didn’t want me around. And I just don’t understand...”

“Y/n-”

“No, I’m not done yet, “You cut her. ”You left me, Alex. The last words you said to me were “I love you” and then you were gone. You’re a liar, playing with my feelings when I gave you everything I could. You were the one that kissed me for the first time, the one that asked me out, for what? For the thrill of having a stupid girl you could toy with?”

“Of course not!”

“Then answer your own question. Why?”

Here you are, having a conversation you didn’t plan to have but wanted. No, it’s not really going as you envisioned. Mostly because you pictured yourself crying your heart out and begging her to come back. You deserve better than that.

“I...I’ve never felt the way I do for you.”

You raise an eyebrow, motion for her to continue cuz that’s not going to cut it. Not after weeks of going radio silent even when you let her know there was something important to talk about. Not after nights where you doubted your own worth.

“I got scared.”

You look at her in disbelief. That’s her reason; the only one, for running away without looking back. And somehow, you what, have to take it in stride? Hell, no.

“That’s bullshit.”

You’ve never been so in love either. And it’s scary; opening up and showing every flaw and vulnerability while expecting to still be enough. It’s bound to be scary, to be overwhelming at times where you can’t believe life and love truly feel like that.

That’s love for you, at least.

It fills your body, carves your bones until you feel weak at the knees. But you grow stronger until the weight of the world falls from your shoulders, until gravity doesn’t affect you anymore and you swear you can fly.

Love shapes the world, makes you find little hints and signs everywhere. The world reminds you so strongly of them that you wonder how you didn’t see it before. It makes you feel invincible, like your life has reached that perfect pinnacle of serendipity.

And that’s just the beginning.

Loving someone shouldn’t hurt. It’s supposed to be a celebration to life and the victories; big or small, found through the days. Sometimes that means a world cup. Sometimes it means buying a house. Sometimes it’s just being able to survive the hardship and exhaustion of a long day.

Love is the backbone of support, it lifts you up when you can’t stand on your own. It’s the quiet whisper in the back of your head reminding you to breathe when your head is underwater. It’s the knowledge that yes, life is not a utopia, and there are battles you gotta face on your own, but that you’re not alone nor lonely.

It’s supposed to be scary; terrifying even. But it’s also supposed to be filled with joy, and wonder. A mix of awe and euphoria that settle into calm. Because in love you can be yourself; the one version of you that the rest of the world doesn’t get to see.

And all of those emotions should make it worth it.

“Do you think I wasn’t scared too?” You finally ask. “I know there’s a lot on the line for you. I knew the terms and conditions of dating you since the beginning. I agreed to keep it a secret until you were ready. If you needed time to figure it out, to come to terms with who and what you are, I would’ve understood. Listen, even if you weren’t ready for a relationship at all, I would have understood. But not like this.”

“Please, Y/n. I’m trying to make things right.”

“Alex,” you say tiredly, rubbing your eyes in the process. “It’s too late. I’m leaving.”

“Don’t go.”

You can say the desperation in her eyes, can hear it in her voice. Still, that’s not enough.

She had a chance, more than one if you’re being honest, to make you stay.

Instead, she’s one of the reasons you’re leaving.

You deserve more than fear or reluctance. You deserve dreams that come true, to find true happiness. You deserve someone that will talk to you when things don’t go as planned; not shut you out completely. You want someone that looks at you with that happy light in their eyes instead of leaving you in the darkness of uncertainty.

“Why does it matter?” You ask with a hint of frustration. “You’re the one that left me! You walked away from us without a word! And I’m not going to be the girl you play with while deciding to pull your head out of your ass or leave it there. I deserve to be happy too. And right now that means being away from you.”

“I’m sorry.”

You feel a rush of everything; anger, sadness, frustration and perhaps a hint of relief as well. It’s hard to decide if you want to slap some sense into her or cross the distance between you just to feel her arms around your waist again.

In the end, you simply shake your head.

“Yeah. Me too.”

“I wish there was a way to go back.”

“You can’t unbreak things. You can learn and do better.”

There’s nothing left to be said, not on your side. And for now, you don’t really care about what she has to say either.

You make your way upstairs to where Ash and Ali are waiting for you. It’s not hard to eavesdrop on an empty house, but they respect you enough to give you space. You’re not a kid; you know how to handle your own battles although the moral backup is always appreciated.

“You’re going to be okay?”

Ali looks deep into your eyes in concern, but her worry is met with a shy smile.

“Yeah, I think I will.”

For the first time in the last few weeks, you are able to breathe with nothing weighing on your chest. Closure is exactly what you needed. Facing her after the prolonged silence was perhaps one of the hardest things you had to do, but now the future seems a little brighter.

*****

Playing in one of the most competitive soccer leagues in the world is far from easy. Even the style seems different; play harder, faster and smarter. But you’ve done great, put your name up there among some of the best.

What some considered potential was polished into talent, although that had more to do with your discipline and hard work. Of course, the press wasn’t so kind as to enlighten that.

At the end of the season you have a championship and a new shining contract waiting for you. All it’s missing is your signature, but there are things to consider still. You miss home. You miss the crazy 23 women you call family.

Hopefully the upcoming USWNT camp will clear some of the doubts.

Maybe seeing them all again will give you the strength to extend your life in Europe. Maybe it’ll make you realize it’s time to go home.

There are many clubs interested in you which is not a surprise after everything you’ve done in a matter of months. Europe has catapulted you to another level, and it’s true there’s so much more to learn. Still, feeling homesick can be one hell of a bitch.

You could always move back to Orlando. Maybe you could move with Tobin in Portland. Tagging along Press with the Royals or go to Chicago for a change. The world is yours if you want it, and Heavens, you absolutely do.

“Why is something telling me you won’t come to stay?”

You glance at Pinoe on your screen while you finish packing. Sue and her are keeping you company as you get ready. Traveling always makes you anxious no matter if it’s just a couple of states over or halfway across the world.

“I haven’t decided yet.”

“Does this have to do with Morgan?”

“What!? No! I haven’t talked to her.”

“Maybe you should.”

You glare at your screen suspiciously because this is Pinoe of all people; telling you to talk to her. Megan Rapinoe; the woman that knows the ins and outs of your relationship and feelings for Alex. It doesn’t make sense unless something happened.

“Okay, fess up.”

“About what?”

The smug look on her face tells you that your mighty glare isn’t working.

Fuck you, Artemis. Again.

“Don’t worry, kid.” Sue intercedes with a gentle albeit playful smile. “You’ll get it soon enough.”

“Get what?”

They don’t answer your question and you don’t have much time to keep asking as they excuse themselves to end the call. Technically, it’s almost time for you to leave. However, their intentions are pretty clear. In the end, you groan in annoyance as they manage to dodge your question multiple times before the call disconnects. Alas, there’s nothing you can do.

It doesn’t take long until you’re on the airplane waiting to take off.

Your leg bounces nervously while you’re torn between looking out of the window or closing your eyes. It’s practically a miracle you decided to move so far, considering how much you hate flying. To be honest, the flight itself isn’t the problem.

Feeling the rumble of such a huge thing, it always makes you wonder how it can actually fly. You’ve seen documentaries and read articles but that fear comes every time you get into a plane. Besides turbulence, lift off is the worst part.

“You can hold my hand if you want.”

Your head snaps up towards the person standing next to you. Even now, after months since the last time you heard that voice. You would be able to recognize it from a million others. That doesn’t take away from the surprise of seeing her there.

“What...” you start, trying to find your voice, “what are you doing here?”

“Taking a plane back home.”

“No, I mean-”

Her chuckle makes you realize she’s teasing. Partially, at least. She sits next to you, ready to go back to the USA. Which doesn’t really explain what she’s doing in the same country as you.

“Alex,” you try again, “why are you here?”

Your time away from her has been odd to say something.

You’ve missed her, she was your best friend even before things escalated into something else. She was the person you trusted the most before everything came tumbling down. And yet, over the last few months you’ve done your best to not think about her too much.

You limited your social media activity mostly to club related posts. Mostly accessed to catch up with some of your other friends, but being careful not to dwell on any of her posts. You scrolled past them in a hurry or got out of the app as soon as possible.

Unfollowing her would have been the smart choice, if you were someone else.

Being under the spotlight it’s great, but it also means everything you do is a clue for something. Unfollowing her would bring up more questions than you were, or still are, willing to answer. It was easier to pretend and move on.

“I got it out.”

Her words catch you by surprise and you shake your head trying to get back in the moment.

“What?”

It’s hard to make sense of any of it when she’s right there. Maybe it’s the shock of seeing her after so long. Maybe it’s hard to pay attention to her with the plane rapidly filling. It feels like you’re running out of time even when there’s nowhere else for you to be.

“You were right,” she says instead.

“Alex,” you warn, trying to get her to the point.

“I got my head out of my ass,” she finally answers with a half smile. However, her eyes remain serene, telling you she’s taking this seriously. “I was an idiot, and I’m sorry. Even then, when I discovered you were leaving, I could only think about myself. I can’t ask you to forgive me. We both know I don’t deserve it after everything I did to you. But you deserved an apology. That’s why I’m here.”

“You came all the way here for that?”

There’s more surprise in your voice than anything else. Sure, you appreciate the gesture but it seems a little overboard. Then again, you’re not sure of the result if she had called. Maybe you wouldn’t have picked the phone to begin with.

“I wanted you to know I mean it. I didn’t feel like words would be enough. Besides, I know how much you hate flying, so coming here just to go back, it’s worth it if it’s for you.”

Against all your common sense, you forgave her long ago. More for your own sake than hers, but all the anger and hurt are gone. The love you felt for her is not what it used to be, and neither is the trust. But in that moment, you’re glad she’s there.

Without saying a word, she offers you her hand.

This is something you’ve done several times, holding her hand during a flight, and you accept her offer just as the plane starts moving. If your grip is too tight, she doesn’t complain. She keeps her eyes on you; making sure you’re alright and damn those blue eyes.

“So, how did Pinoe know you were coming?”

“Did she tell you?”

“Not really,” you answer truthfully. “She said I should talk to you and that I would get it. You know her and Sue, they can be cryptic. Still, never expected to find you here.”

“Yeah, well...” She shies away from your gaze for a second but meets your eyes again. “Once you left I realized my mistake. I mean, I did before that. Guess it was easy to justify everything with fear. Then you weren’t there and the fear of losing you forever was bigger than the one of losing everything else.”

No, you’re not going to fall in love with her all over again. Not after you spent months getting over her. Even if she looks at you and you feel like she can see right into your soul.

“Alex, I can’t-”

“Hey,” she softly interrupts. “I’m not asking anything from you; I messed up. And like you said, I can’t unbreak things, I can only try to fix them.”

You can extend her an olive branch; a start. You’re not sure whether this is a good idea or not. It’s hard to tell where this is going to tell you. Still, you beg to the Lesbian Gods to guard your heart.

For now, you’re glad the 10+ hours journey back to America is not a lonely one.

*****

“Everything ready?”

You look over your shoulder to face some of your teammates.

You’ve decided to go for another year in Europe; extending your stay with the club you love while trying to win another chip and extra hardware.

“Almost.”

“I knew you wouldn’t stay,” Pinoe claims.

“But you sure wish I did.”

Her shrug confirms your suspicions because hell, you’re going to miss them too. It’s weird to be in a similar position as you were last year, and yet, everything feels different. You’re still at camp instead of sharing a wonderful evening at the Harris-Krieger household, but everyone that matters is there.

Last time it was a hundred percent your decision to leave although there were motivations besides soccer. This time your terms are different, you’re chasing a dream instead of running from a nightmare. You want to keep learning, growing and being the best you can be.

“You’ll come with me again?” You ask Alex teasingly.

“Not this time. But,” she pauses for dramatic effect. “I’ll be waiting for you when you get back.”

There’s some kind of promise there that you refuse to fully believe. It wouldn’t be the first time you get your hopes too high, or the one where you crash down in free fall with no parachute.

Camp has served you right, both of you. And maybe you stopped Ash from killing Alex when it was known you two would share a room, but things are...better.

“You can always visit.”

All eyes fall on you, trying to decide what is going on in your mind. To be honest? You’re not quite sure either. But you feel that pull towards Alex, daring you to allow her in.

You tell yourself this is a mistake. There’s absolutely nothing stopping her from doing something stupid, from leaving you hanging while you doubt yourself again. Everything could play out exactly like the last time, except something is different this time.

You’re not quite capable of explaining. You’re not gonna dive without testing the water either. So there’s another year overseas with some distance to keep your head clear. Whatever happens in that lapse, it’ll be the answer you need.

“Call me if you get homesick.”

“Except if it’s three am?” You ask with a sideways glance to Megan.

“Even if it’s three am,” Alex corrects. “Can’t promise I won’t fall asleep on you tho.”

“As if you didn’t do exactly that already.”

“Hey! At least I would pick up.”

“Fine. I’ll take it.”

There’s a small grin in your lips while you pack the last of your stuff.

You look at your friends and family one more time knowing they’ll be there when you come back. And looking at Alex you know there’s a chance home will be waiting for you.

“Okay. Let’s do this.”

#alex morgan imagine #alex morgan imagines #uswnt imagine #uswnt imagines #alex morgan x reader #fulfilled prompt #excuse any typos #it's five am and I'm ready to die

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pparkerpoetry · 3 years

Text

Face Reality (Part 12)

Title: Secrets Fester (but they aren’t the only things that grow)

Summary: Tommy's hybrid half urges him to seek out his family. Sam is hiding something, but they don't know what. Tubbo learns about a part of himself he didn't know existed and is reminded of his past.

Part One

Part Thirteen

Masterlist

___________

Tommy woke up last a few days later to a soft trilling in the corners of his mind. He groaned- it was his turn for a thin day, apparently. He wasn’t surprised, he’d read that families tended to group their days close together.

He sat up and sighed. His thin days were always embarrassing, his stupid little bird brain always wanted to spend time with his family, and constantly wanted cuddles. Tommy didn’t want cuddles.

Yes you do.

Tommy huffed. No, he didn’t want cuddles. He wanted to get through the day without getting teased. Maybe he could just stay in his room all day. Yes, that was a good idea.

Make a nest? His mind asked, getting excited.

He rolled his eyes. Okay, maybe he could make a nest. That was relatively normal, right? His hands moved to grasp the blankets and shape them into a sort of circling wall, with enough space in the middle for him to curl up underneath his wings. He ignored the happy cooing that his mind wanted to release- he couldn’t just chirp and trill, that’d bring noise, and noise meant someone coming in, which meant embarrassment. He didn’t want that.

Flock, The bird in him trilled sadly. Where’s your flock?

“Busy,” Tommy grumbled, moving a wing to cover his face. “So shut the fuck up.”

He stayed there, keeping the sounds at bay, for a long time. Too long.

There was a knock at the door. “Hey, Tommy?” Ranboo asked. “Are you alright? It’s almost noon, and you never sleep in this long.”

Tommy opened his mouth to say he was fine, but a distressed chirp escaped instead. He winced, hoping Ranboo didn’t hear it.

“Uh, pardon?” Ranboo chuckled a little. “Can I come in?”

He wanted to say no. But the part that wanted to say no was overpowered by his bird brain. Literally. “Yes.” He sighed reluctantly.

When he walked in, Ranboo immediately spoke. “Aww, Tommy, is it a thin day?”

He nodded miserably, forgetting that his wing was covering his face.

“Aw, Tommy, come on, most of us are in the living room.”

His stupid bird sounds made him give out a happy trill, and then he cut it off with a grumble. “They’re gonna tease me.”

Flock? Flock?

Ranboo lifted Tommy’s wing and stared at his face. “If I make them promise you aren’t going to say anything, will you come out? It’s not healthy to suppress this.”

Tommy sighed. “Fine. But they need to promise to not take any photos for blackmail.”

Ranboo left the room, which his mind didn’t like, but he sucked it up. Eventually, Ranboo came back and beckoned Tommy to follow him.

When they got to the living room, he frowned. “Where’s Dad?”

Flock? Where is the flock? Why is it not complete?

“Prison.” Purpled sighed. “Something about making sure the prisoner didn’t die.”

“That’s okay though,” Tubbo smiled. “We’re here! We’re enough, right?”

Tommy’s frown deepened. “I guess.” He went over and flopped on top of whoever was on the couch. He wasn’t sure who, but someone started preening his wings and he let out a happy sigh that morphed into a purr.

All of them remained close to the living room for most of the morning, taking turns being near Tommy since his body radiated warmth and the house tended to be a bit colder (which didn’t make a whole lot of sense, since Sam liked warmth, but..).

Sam came back a little after lunch.

“What took you so long?” Fundy drawled, head hanging off of the couch and feet dangling over the back. “You got a secret girlfriend?”

Sam had been drinking some water, and nearly spit it out. He was content to stick with choking on it, instead. “No,” He said weakly. “Nope, no girlfriend here. I just had a weird conversation with Dream and had to think about it a bit.”

Everyone squinted at Sam for a moment, but Tommy interrupted by barreling into him. “Hi, dad.”

“Hey, Tommy,” Sam smiled. “Your turn, huh?”

Tommy chirped a bit, burrowing his head into Sam’s chest and letting his wings circle them both.

“Who’s the clingy one now?” Tubbo mused from a chair. “Hint, it’s not me.”

________

Sam was having an odd day. He hadn’t been lying when he said he’d gone to the prison, but Dream was being weird.

________

“So, how’d those hybrid hunters end up?” Dream asked nonchalantly.

Sam turned. He was just about to leave, but… “You knew they were coming? And you didn’t warn us? I have the emergency contact button for a reason, Dream.”

Dream chuckled. “I knew you wouldn’t have your device on, since you exploded, and well, I couldn’t be bothered to reach anyone else by now. Haven’t you learned, Sam, that I just don’t care?”

Sam glared at him. “You’re lucky my boys took care of them. Tubbo and Purpled could’ve been killed, since humans are no use to the hunters.”

“Humans?” Dream laughed again, before realizing Sam was serious. “Sam, no one on this server is completely human. I made sure of it.”

“What?” Sam shook his head. “You’re saying they’re hybrids, too?”

Dream was quiet. “I’ve already helped you enough. I think you’ve gotta give me something in return, if you want more.”

“Alright. Be like that, then. See you next week.” Sam sighed, leaving the prison. His brain was muddled with thoughts.

When were Tubbo and Purpled going to show their true colors? What hybrids were they? Was Dream even telling the truth?

__________

And, well… He took a detour before he got home, sure, but he hadn’t been lying when he said he didn’t have a girlfriend… but it felt weird keeping a secret, even if he’d been keeping it for a while.

He had Tommy to think about before tonight… would he be able to leave the house? Tommy seemed pretty attached.

The day went by okay after he got home, to be fair. There was one incident where Tommy tried to get on top of the fridge to divebomb everyone since he was too tired to fly up, but Sam got him down.

Having a relatively tame Tommy was a nice change, but it was odd. Sam kinda wanted his energised son back, even if he was a little annoying at times.

At any rate, he’d made some half put together excuse as to why he needed to leave for the night, and planned on leaving through a hidden back door connected to his room once he was ready. He looked in the mirror and scrunched his face up. He hated wearing suits. He was more a sweatshirt type of guy, or he wore his mask when he was working, but never suits. Why was he doing this again?

He patted down his- jacket? He wasn’t sure what it was called, but he straightened it (some part of his brain snorted at that), then fiddled with his tie.

The door burst open before he could stop it, and then it was just Sam, in a fancy suit, staring at Tommy, both looking like deer in headlights.

“Where you going, big man?” Tommy asked, less clingy than this morning as his human side was taking back more control.

Sam winced. He couldn’t lie to Tommy, even if he wanted to. Not directly. “I’ve uh, I’ve got a date.”

Tommy lit up. “No kidding? Who’s the lucky lady?”

“I’m gonna refrain from answering that.” Sam chuckled nervously. “Are you going to be alright while I’m gone?”

“Are you crazy? We gotta tell the others so we can hype you up, and then we’re gonna meet our new mom!” (Sam didn’t know it, but Tommy’s mind was spamming flock)

Sam’s eyes widened. “No, no, no, Tommy, I don’t think that’s a good idea-”

It was too late. Tommy had already run down the hall, and Sam barely had time to sit down on his bed before the entire herd of his sons came barreling back, outraged that Sam had kept such a momentous secret from them.

“Are you nervous?” Tubbo asked, towards the back of the group.

Sam shrugged, “I mean, yeah, but-”

Fundy grinned. “It’s gonna go great, dad. You’ve got nothing to worry about, she’s going to love you.”

Sam cringed, “I, uh, I’m sure she will?”

“Yeah! That’s the spirit!” Tommy cheered. “On the other hand, can we go meet her? I promise we won’t be weird.”

“Can you promise that?” Ranboo teased. “But yeah, can we?”

Sam sighed. “I mean, I guess,”

“Do we have to put on suits?” Purpled complained, “Cause if we have to, I don’t wanna go.”

“No,” Sam said, putting his head into his hands. “You don’t have to put on a suit.”

“Hey hey hey,” Tommy said, sitting next to Sam on his bed, “Now is not the time to be sad. You are going on a date with a woman, and that is Pogchamp. Now is a time to celebrate. Let’s go, you’re going to be late, and you can’t be late if you’re going to absolutely win her over like I know you are.”

“Thank guys,” Sam said, and he meant it a little. Now he had something to worry about other than his date. “You’re right, let’s go.”

It was… an interesting walk. His boys were hyping him up, which he appreciated, but he was nervous. He had been hoping to wait a little longer to tell them. Of course they found out on one of his only dates after he’d adopted them all.

Finally, after a stroll through the woods, they arrived at the place: a lovely little clearing with fairy lights that shone and twinkled as the sun set with a table in the center set in the middle. There was food, and candles, and it was all very romantic, but the boys weren’t focused on that. They were focused on the person who was standing by the table, in a suit, rose in hand.

Purpled was the first one to speak. “Ponk?” He stepped closer and fell into a hug from the man who was, indeed, Ponk. “Is this really you?”

“Yeah, Purp. It’s me. I’m sorry you had to go through all that you did alone.” Ponk said, surprisingly softly. “I wanted to see you, but Sam told me to let you heal a bit, first.”

“Bitch.” Purpled said, but it was clear he was trying not to cry. “I missed you.”

“I missed you, too. I thought you would’ve come to see me earlier.”

Purpled shook his head, refusing to leave Ponk’s hug. “How could I? We just found out you guys were a thing today, I was too scared to visit you otherwise.”

Ponk turned to Sam with an exasperated look. “Sam, I thought you said you were gonna tell them!”

“Well, I had every intention to,” Sam said defensively, “but everyone kept getting hurt and it never seemed like the right time.”

“Wait,” Tommy butted in, “How long have you guys been dating? I thought this was like, a first date type thing and that’s why he was so nervous.”

“Aw, Sam! You were nervous?”

Sam, in question, flushed a little. “I mean, how could I not be? You’re so amazing and all, I-”

“How long?” Tommy asked loudly. “You aren’t answering my questions, and they need answering! Now!”

“Well,” Ponk winced, “Sammy, you answer it. They should hear it from you.”

“What do you mean we should hear it from Sam?” Tubbo asked. “How long has this been going on?”

Purpled squinted at Ponk. “And why don’t you want to answer?”

“A little over a year and a half.” Sam blurted out, and all eyes turned to him.

“What?” Tommy cried out. “And we didn’t know? You’re our dad, you’re supposed to tell us these things!”

Sam was at a loss for words. “I didn’t know you guys cared about my love life?” He tried as a weak response.

“Of course we care,” Fundy argued. “We always care, and that’s why we came here to make sure that whoever you were dating was fit to be our other parent. We just… weren’t expecting Ponk.”

“Who were you expecting?” Ponk asked, confused.

“Well, Tommy thought it was a girl.” Tubbo said, and Tommy tried to deny it.

“You thought-” Ponk laughed. “You thought Sam was dating a girl?”

“Sam didn’t say he wasn’t!” Tommy protested.

It was quiet a moment longer, until Ponk interrupted it, arms still around Purpled. “Wait, Sam, your love life? You love me?”

All eyes turned to Sam as he blushed furiously and scratched at the back of his head. “Well, I mean, you’re really funny and your smile is really cute, and I really like spending time with you…”

Tommy glanced from Sam to Ponk, both blushing and looking at the ground bashfully, and groaned. “Oh, my god! We get it, you’re in love! Get a room.”

The two adults both spluttered, trying to get a response, before Tommy spoke again. “Go ahead, say ‘i love you’ and all that gross mushy stuff. Pretend we’re not even here. I swear, we’re not gonna say anything. Just go for it.”

“I mean,” Sam started, looking up at Ponk, “if you want to, of course I don’t want to make you uncomfortable, or anything...”

“I love you.” Ponk blurted out.

“I love you, too.” Sam responded breathlessly. “A lot. Like, probably too much.”

Ponk hid his face a little, and held out his hand. “I, um, I got you a rose,”

“I saw. You’re adorable.”

It was quiet, and Ranboo coughed a little. “C’mon, guys, they probably want us to leave. It’s their date, after all.”

“Do we have to?” Purpled asked, “This is more entertaining than any movie we’ve watched, I wanna keep making them embarrassed.”

“I agree with Ranboo,” Tommy said, “We should probably go. However, I also agree with Purp, because I want to stay.”

Ponk shrugged. “I mean, I can woo Sammy here another day if you all wanna just go watch a movie, or something. Sam? You alright with that?”

Sam had to admit he'd wanted a nice night with just him and Ponk, but part of his mind was worried for Tommy, since he was still going through a thin day. “Sure, I guess we can watch a movie tonight and do something else later.”

So, they all walked back to Sam’s base, boys in front, politely pretending that they didn’t notice Sam and Ponk holding hands in the back. They didn’t want to notice it. They also pretended to not notice the little sweet whispers that the two exchanged, and the boys were starting to regret their decision to not leave the two alone.

Despite that, they all watched a movie, huddled in a nest that Tommy had made. He stretched his wings around those that he could, but ultimately was content to just huddle up against Sam and sleep, instead of watching the movie.

Sam was curled up next to Ponk, which was a little odd considering the height difference, but they made it work. Sam wasn’t sure where the rest of his boys were in the nest.

At some point that night, once it was late and it was just him and Ponk awake, he felt Ponk shift.

“Where are you going?” Sam asked sleepily, clutching the sweatshirt that he’d let Ponk borrow. “Why are you leaving?”

“It’s late,” Ponk whispered. “I need to get home.”

“No,” Sam pouted. “I don’t want you to go home. You should stay here for the night.”

“I appreciate it, Sammy, but I really-”

“I almost died a few days ago and you’re not going to do what I want?” Sam murmured, waking up slightly.

“Oh, Sam,” Ponk said, sadness weighing his voice down. “Don’t joke about that. You worried me, when you didn’t talk to me for a week, then I found out from Tubbo that the hunters were back. I was so worried that I’d get there too late, and you’d be gone. Hell, before I found out, I thought you were breaking up with me.”

“I’d never do that. Don’t be sad.” Sam said tiredly, but Ponk wasn’t done.

“And then, and then I found out this morning that you’d gone against some, some fucking god, and you won, and you’d adopted Purpled, and I found out all the shit that he’d gone through and how you reacted, and I’m scared.”

“Of what? I’ll protect you, Ponkie.”

“I’m scared that one day you’ll go up against some big bad villain and you won’t make it out alive, Sammy. You take on so much, and what if I can’t help you?”

Sam looked up, and saw that Ponk was crying softly. “Oh, Ponk. I’m always going to come back, because I have a reason to. I’ve got you to come back to, I’ve got my boys. I’ll fight with everything I’ve got to make it out alive.”

“But what if that isn't enough?” Ponk stressed. “I joke all the time, and I mess around, but I’m scared. I don’t want to lose you.”

“You won’t.” Sam assured him, pulling Ponk back into a hug. “Stay the night?” He asked again.

“Okay,” Ponk relented, sniffling. “But I’ve got to go home in the morning. Are you going to let me go?”

Sam smiled sleepily and pulled Ponk closer, burying his head in his shoulder. “No promises. I love you.”

“I love you too, you big sap.”

_______

Tubbo woke up last the next morning. His head hurt, like he had a headache, and his mouth was dry. He wasn’t aware that he’d woken up last, as he was still curled up in the nest and didn’t really want to do… anything. His head hurt too much.

He let out a little whine, burrowing his head into the blankets as the light hit his face.

“Tubbo? You up, man?” Who was that? That was Tommy, right?

“Tommy?” He murmured. “My head hurts.”

The voice chuckled. “Not Tommy. I’m Ranboo. I dunno, you need an advil, or something?”

“I don’t know,” Tubbo groaned. “Make it stop.”

He heard a slight humming. “Maybe I should go get Sam.”

“No,” Tubbo pouted, curling up even more. “Get Tommy. I want Tommy.”

Footsteps echoed away from him, and Tubbo moved one of his arms under his head. His fingers brushed against his ear, and-

“What?” He sat up, poking at the back of his ear, momentarily blocking out the pain of his head. “What?”

Sam walked into the room, “What d’you mean? Anything wrong? Ranboo said your head hurt, or something.”

“Sam,” Tubbo started, hands still covering his ears. “Why am I growing fur?”

A look of sudden surprise was painted across Sam’s face before it settled on a grimace. “Well, Tubbo, you’re a hybrid.”

Tubbo looked up quickly, wincing at the pounding in his head. “I’m a hybrid? How do you know?”

“When I visited Dream he mentioned it,” Sam mumbled a bit, before speaking a little louder. “Anyway, it’s probably going to hurt. I’ll send someone to go grab Tommy, since most of us were born with our hybrid features rather than growing them.”

Tubbo thought Sam spoke more, but he wasn’t listening. His head was still hurting, and the pain was still increasing. He wanted Tommy. He missed Tommy, where was he?

How had he gotten on the couch? Was he crying? Oh. His head hurt a lot. “Tommy?” He sniffled, too far gone to hate how vulnerable his voice was.

“I’m here, Tubs. I’m here.”

“What’s going on?” He managed, trying to turn to his side but yelping when the pain spiked.

“You’re probably growing something.” Tommy said nonchalantly, putting a hand into Tubbo’s hair.

Tommy’s hands put pressure on the side of his head. “Ow,” Tubbo cried, and Tommy rushed an apology. It was quiet for a moment. “What am I growing?”

“I can’t tell yet.” Tommy hesitated. “Your ears look pretty cool, though. They’ve gotten all long and furry.”

“My ears are furry?” Tubbo didn’t quite catch Tommy’s reply as he fell asleep despite the pounding in his head.

_________

The next time Tubbo woke up, he was alone. He was still on the couch, but daylight streamed through the windows and the house was silent. Where was everyone?

His head felt much better, but his mouth was still dry, so he pried himself off of the blankets and padded into the kitchen for a glass of water. He turned the faucet on and yawned as the water poured out, reaching up to scratch his head.

His hand hit something smooth and solid, right above his ear.

Tubbo turned off the faucet as his eyebrows furrowed, walking over to the bathroom, glass still in his clutches. No one was in the halls, and he frowned as he pushed the bathroom door open.

His gaze raised to the mirror, and the glass slipped from his fingers to shatter on the ground. He didn’t register the water that soaked through his socks, but he stared, unblinking, as his eyes filled with tears. He stumbled backwards, yelping as he fell into the tub and sobs racked his body.

“Tubbo?” Tommy’s voice called from down the hall. “I heard a crash, are you alright?” The voice got louder and Tubbo’s cries did, too. Tommy’s head popped through the door frame. “Tubbo?”

In the corner of the shower, Tubbo was huddling with his legs pressed against his chest and head ducked down. When he spoke, it came out soft and trembling. “We promised.”

“What?” Tommy started, but was cut off by Tubbo.

“We promised that you wouldn’t be the next Wilbur, and I wouldn’t be the next Schlatt.”

“Yeah?” Tommy said, tilting his head, crouching down in front of Tubbo and holding his hands out, palms up. “And we kept it. We’re fine, okay? We’re safe, and nothing is going to happen. Let’s get clean-”

“Then why have I grown horns?” Tubbo cried, tears streaming down his face. “I was finally able to move on, and now I’ve got a permanent reminder of him. He promised he wasn’t my father, Tommy, but what if he really did lie about everything?”

“Oh, Tubbo.” Tommy said softly. “Schlatt’s not your father.”

“How can you be sure?” Tubbo asked, but he moved into Tommy’s arm for a hug. His chin rested on Tommy’s shoulder.

“Because,” Tommy reasoned, “Your horns aren’t the same. His curved around his ears, right? Yours stick up a little. And your ears!” Tommy smiled, and lightly flicked one of Tubbo’s ears. “You’ve got some yellow fur growing. I’d bet good money that you’re a moobloom.”

“You bet good money for stupid reasons, though, Tommy.” Tubbo murmured, falling asleep again as Tommy’s wings wrapped around him.

Tommy went to reply, but Tubbo had fallen asleep. “You’re lucky that you’re my best friend, bitch.” He grumbled, picking up Tubbo to move him to the couch again. He’d clean up the bathroom too, but Tubbo was more important.

His best friend was more important.

Family was more important.

More important than anything.

#tommyinnit #tubbo #awesamdude #purpled #ponk #awesamponk #fic #angst #hurt/comfort #ao3 #ranboo #fundy #dream #dreamsmp #jschlatt #moobloom!tubbo #winged tommyinnit #creeper!sam #enderman!ranboo

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cpcoulter-official · 3 years

Text

This is Me Trying

For a long moment, he scanned the trees and bushes, through the sidewalk, up and down. Satisfied it was empty, or reasonably so, he stepped back from the window and drew the curtains slightly, allowing a few lances of sunshine through.

As he turned to scoop up the electric kettle, Julian said from the counter, “It’s fine, don’t worry. No one followed me or saw me.” He never even looked up from the drink cupped in his hands.

Oz just smiled faintly as he poured hot water over the teabag in his own cup. “You gotta admit, there’s no way to really be sure when it’s someone of your caliber.” He walked over to the kitchen island and took the seat across the corner from his unexpected guest.

Julian didn’t answer. Oz gave him a few charitable moments of contemplative quiet as he steeped his own tea. He took the bag out with care, adding sugar generously, before reaching over to take his guest’s cup and swapping it with his cup. “This looks like it’d be better for you. You’re expecting too much out of your coffee from the way you stare at it.”

“What is this?” Julian asked with a mild grimace when he took a bracing sip.

Oz was pleased; getting some emotion out of him was good. “It’s herbal. Supposed to calm you. I wouldn’t know, I don’t drink it a lot.”

“Like you need any more calming…” Julian snorted and took another sip. “Thanks.”

“No problem,” Oz replied, setting down his own drink. “So...are you...going to tell me what brings you to San Francisco?” He smirked slightly before taking another sip. “Without even a call to warn me that I was going to have an Oscar nominee sitting in my kitchen?”

“Don’t be like that,” Julian made a face at him. “That never mattered to you.”

“You’re right…” Oz laughed, hoping it was contagious enough to crack a smile from the other boy. He looked around again. “...but seriously, you need to tell someone where you are. You didn’t even bring a bodyguard?” He looked at Julian with a furrow on his brow. “Given what happened...I’d expect you’d have your own Secret Service at this point.”

Julian’s hands tightened around the cup as he stared into it. “...yeah, my handler thinks I’ve gone to see Berkeley.”

Oz lit up at that. “Are you? Did you change your mind? You’re going to college?”

“Do I look like I have time to go to college…?” Julian retorted, barely moving.

“You never know,” Oz replied with a smile. “You always make time when it matters to you.” He paused before adding with a sigh, “Which is why...I know there has to be a really good reason you’re sitting in my kitchen right now.”

The pause felt heavy, and Oz wasn’t used to that with this particular person. He remembered how Julian used to laugh in the same way light reflects from glass; it would scatter in echoes on the walls and you didn’t have a choice but to smile. Because he seemed so...young.

And looking at this boy, sunglasses on his messy chocolate-colored crown, oversized merch sweater from the last Haven tour, flushed from the sunny outdoors but heavy-lidded, and lashes smudged dark onto his cheeks--he looked younger than ever.

“I just...thought I’d come by.” Julian whispered.

It sounded like a secret. Like everything about this visit. Like everything about the two of them.

“...you look tired,” Oz remarked quietly. “You haven’t been sleeping well?”

“...sometimes I think I sleep too much.”

“Not back to work yet, are you?” Oz asked, concerned. “You don’t look to be in any condition to go back work the way you do.” That, and nothing in the news and gossip rags suggested that Julian Larson had ever even stirred out of his house. At least not from what Oz knew.

“I want to…” Julian sighed, stirring the cup as though the dredges would answer him. “...it’d be something to do. I don’t want to be inside anymore. Like…” The way he stared out to the sunshine outside made it seem like he was looking through worlds. “...I want to be somewhere else.”

There was a pause, and then Julian looked at him with a faint smile. “You were the first person I thought of.”

At that, Oz had the humility to blush as he looked away from that familiar smile. He remembered back when he was free to kiss it when he wanted, but never really took advantage of the fact. Now it just felt like something glimmering in the distance that he could admire and not touch. And he was alright with that.

What he wasn’t alright with was the reason it was here again. “I’m flattered, J. But...I’m just more worried about you than ever now.” He sighed. “Everyone’s heard about what happened to you, and then not much about you since.”

“You’ve kept tabs on me?”

“Hard not to,” Oz smiled. “You left an impression.”

“And what did you hear everyone say about me?” Julian asked, almost sarcastically.

“That you were healing, that your manager said that you’re resting, that your mother is looking after you, that rumor has it you’re going to a spa in the Netherlands for therapy, that you’re going to be okay…” Oz leaned back with a smile. Then he was serious again. “But you’re not okay.”

“I’m not,” Julian admitted. He hesitated for one more moment, and then maybe his internal walls started to crack, as it all came rushing out. “I can’t stay home and...watch my mother worry about me. Stare at me with that look on her face. I can’t eat another plate of aggressively healthy organic recovery food. I can’t...deal with cameras with the telephoto lenses around the corner down our street. Watching for me. I don’t...know how they knew where I go for physical therapy and I want to throw my phone every time there’s an update about an in-depth interview request or...or…an appearance at Oprah or...or…” He let out a shaking breath. “They said this was all in my head, it’s all up to me about getting “better” or that I’m so talented that I shouldn’t waste it and I need to get better, all that, but everyone’s doing things around me and looking at me and expecting me to do...something... It’s just…” He closed his eyes and pressed his hands to his temples.

He looks so young.

Oz smiled sadly. “...it’s too much noise, huh?”

“It’s...everyone wanting a piece of me.” Julian braced his elbows on the counter and stared into the distance again. “...I don’t even know if I want me. Or if I can be the me that everyone wants right now.”

“Nobody has the right to demand that of you,” Oz replied softly, after charitable consideration. “You shouldn’t be made to feel like you owe them anything.”

“Is that why you quit…?” Julian asked.

“I never quit,” Oz bristled back at him, and for the first time, that familiar laugh scattered onto his walls. “I’m just not as intense about my filmography as you. I do still work, you know.”

“S’not what your IMDB page says.”

“You’ve kept tabs on me?” Oz teasingly mimicked him. But he smiled. “I do theatre these days. You should try it. You’d be amazing at it.”

“What’s college like?” Julian asked with a soft smile at him. “Do you like it?”

“It’s alright,” Oz laughed, indulging his need to change the topic. “I’d rather be on the stage. But having a degree is an important part of my fallback plan, and it’d make my parents feel better, so I trudge through it.” He smiled warmly at Julian. “You don’t need a backup plan, though. You’ve always known what you wanted and where you wanted to be.”

Those beautiful brown eyes just stared at him, looking big and a little haunted. “...do I?”

“You do,” Oz replied firmly, taking his hand and giving it a firm squeeze. “You always have. And if you don’t yet...well… you’ll figure it out.”

“I’m trying,” Julian’s voice started to waver, his hands cold and they shook. “I’m trying so hard but…I can’t see it yet.”

“You will,” Oz replied, staring back at him. “Julian, you… You know, you’re literally the weirdest kid I know? I have never in my life met anyone like you. When we were...when we were still a thing, I was intimidated by the fact that you had such a clear, definite goal in front of you. And it was a crazy stupid goal too, a freaking EGOT by age twenty-one, like—” he paused for a moment when he heard Julian let out a laugh, “—seriously, like in what universe does someone your age, my age have that insane goal with a refusal to accept any other outcome, and you were so intense about it that you were literally within reach of it, huh? And there was just me, like, happy to just get another casting…Hell, I could’ve done Youtube and been happy. I kept asking myself, who are you, why is this person going out with me, like…?”

He smiled as he waited for Julian to wipe his eyes. Then he added, “...you’re a freak in the way that… you figure it out. All the time. Like how a cat always lands on its feet. I mean I’m not going to say all your choices are great, but…” He shrugged. “You get there. And I know you’ll figure it out when you give yourself the chance to.”

“Cat…” Julian smiled faintly, looking as though he were remembering something. It was a pause before he suddenly said, “You know my mom got me one? Like...supposedly he’s an emotional support cat but I think she just got him for me for...companionship purposes.”

“Always good to have a friend,” Oz replied with a grin. Then he blinked in realization. “...is that why you came to me?”

“...I didn’t know if you’d care, if I dropped in without telling you,” Julian gave him an almost apologetic smile. “But I just...needed someone away from...all that.”

That was big. Bigger than Oz had expected. Julian Larson was not someone he knew to really need anyone. Even when they worked together in Something Damaged, it was like the show needed Julian and not the other way around. He even knew everyone’s lines better than they did.

“I’m just...trying to get better,” Julian whispered, reminding Oz that he’d gone quiet. “I thought...going to someone away from all this would help.”

Oz smiled and squeezed his hands reassuringly. “See…? I told you you’d know where to go.” He received a small smile for that. “Screw what everyone wants you to do. What do you want to do? Where do you want to be?”

It was like the question frightened him. Julian’s eyes were wide and he looked like he was looking for an answer. But was it really the question that worried him, or the answer?

Softly, Oz said, “Forget their expectations of you. And forget what you’re expecting of yourself. You haven’t let anything or anyone down. All this...it’s...just a setback. You’re getting back to your feet, that’s what it is. So… if there’s someplace you want to be, just for right now, or the immediate future… You should be there. Like when you picked to be here suddenly.”

He gave Julian an intent stare. “When you think of where you want to be...where’s the first place you think of…?”

Julian was very quiet as he stared back at him. But Oz knew, behind those brown eyes, he was seeing something or someone. A place or a person. Something. Like he was seeing an instant flashback. Julian did know where he wanted to be. He always did. Oz knew that well.

But wherever it is… it may not be a place he can be in just yet.

So he smiled instead. “Hey. You don’t have to go there this second. You don’t have to look so afraid. I’m not going to throw you out my door to go. You’re welcome to stay for as long as you like.”

“...I guess not.” Julian managed to smile.

“Well, if you’re not going anywhere for a bit, then…” Oz poured him another cup of tea, beaming at him and trying to lighten the mood. “So...tell me about your new cat, and I’ll tell you about theatre.”

“I would like that.”

~~~

#daltonfic #side-canon #post-siege

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