#like how my friend from middle school just transferred over to my uni and i havent seen him since high school graduation and we're finally

[daegall]

Fool

pairing: Ice hockey player! Sungchan x figure skater! reader

genre: fluff

warnings: umm is falling on your ass like 3 times a warning ALSO IDK THIS MIGHT BE CHEESY.................

word count: 2k+ words (WTF WHY CANT I WRITE LIKE THIS FOR MY OTHER COLLABS HUH

a/n: whooo!! this is part of @knet-bakery's nostalgic melodies event!! though this will be posted while in supposed to be on a mini hiatus, i hope it still goes well and nothing wrong happens! enjoy bubs <33

🎶: fool - nct 127

You were very proud to announce to your closest friends and family that you've been accepted to your university's figure skating team! It was, and still is, one of your biggest accomplishments. First you got into your dream school, then your dream team, what's next, you're dream boy?

You feel your chest tighten and breathing stop as you enter your uni's ice rink, the cold sensation of the ice instantly nipping at your warm skin. It's not like you mind, you've felt it all your life, it was your favorite feeling.

The sound of skates scraping against the ice fills your ears, swarming around your body and swirling especially in your heart, the nostalgic sound of it feeling so nostalgic to you.

It was crazy how much time you spent on the ice.

"Y/n!"

They beckon you over, to which you instantly rush up to them with buzzing excitement coursing through your veins.

Just as you get right next to them, and greet them enthusiastically, a bunch of boys come out of the changing room with red and blue uniforms, laughing and chatting loudly with each other as they get onto the ice.

Just as you get right next to them, and greet them enthusiastically, a bunch of boys come out of the changing room with red and blue uniforms, laughing and chatting loudly with each other as they get onto the ice.

Woah, you think. It's the gators!

You've seen them play before, and they are really no joke. They gave the best team players, fastest skaters, and the most strategic moves. They have so many international transfers as well.

You recognize each and every one of them, every one but a certain tall, shy boy. There's a sudden rush of warmth that spreads through your face and ears, and your eyes widen as you see him skate gracefully in the ice.

"Woah, aren't they great? Y/n didn't you- oh gosh are you blushing?"

Your palms instantly fly up to cover your face, shaking your head no, "N-no! I'm just cold!"

They all know it's bullshit, you've never been so red because of the cold, and you would literally skate all night with only a t-shirt when the team was opening for players. There is no way you're just cold. He

"Whatever you say, Y/n. Come on, let's get our skates."

You give them a tight nod, picking your duffle back up into your arms. You give the hockey players one last glance, and already find the new member looking right at your direction. A squeak erupts from your throat, before you scurry off into the changing rooms quickly.

You didn't expect to be skating at the same time as the hockey players, but you guess it's how the first practice of the semester goes. Each of the coaches are at the benches, talking to each other excitedly as they talk about each of their new skaters.

You're only doing a few spins on the ice, your nerves making it somehow colder, when you catch the new guy looking at you again. You try to brush it off, but to no avail. You slip and fall.

It's alright, most of the skaters here have already done the exact same thing, some taking a fall even worse than yours. You groan and pat your lower back and butt in pain, before getting up quickly to start yet once again. It's a painful, but daily routine.

The coaches stand to call all team members, each on different sides of the rink. To your dismay, you're all the way on the other side from your teammates and coach. You quickly get up to skate to them, but the second you get up you're tumbling back down because of a weight pushing you.

"A-ah! I'm so sorry! I didn't see you..."

Your head snaps up at the unfamiliar voice, and your own voice disappears when you see the same cute new member from the hockey team.

There's an awkward moment between you two as you just stare at each other, breaths being stolen away by one another, but remaining breathless. Your heart pounds dangerously loudly in your ears, swelling in a way you've never felt before.

It feels like forever, before the boy helps you up with an apologetic pat at your lower back.

That’s all you think of for the rest of the week, in the middle of class, eating lunch, heck, when you’re late to class, his awkward smile and gleaming eyes permanent in your memories.

Your teammates tease you to no end, calling you out whenever the boy, who you’ve learned his name is Sungchan, comes within just 15 meters from you.

It’s no different for him himself, it all started when Donghyuck teased him of how red he was and how he would always glance at you that day. He was never one to believe in love at first sight, but suddenly it was his whole love life the moment he helped you up from the ice.

Fortunately for the both of you, you got to see each other without being teased out of your minds. At first, you doubted why you signed up for economy, but now you keep looking at the clock to see how far 5th period was.

Maybe coincidence, maybe fate, you don’t really care. Just the fact that you get to sit next to him in econ made your heart thump quickly.

But, even with such time, you two were still too shy to make a move. It was so obvious you wanted to, but it was like a mutual agreement that the time will come, when the time will come.

You kind of regret it though, you hate that you have to be so self conscious around him, when there are your teammates, always walking up to random dudes and asking them random shit.

You think this and curse to yourself as you open the ice rink doors, the cool wind blowing at your face for the nth time this week.

Just as you get sight of the ice, a familiar red and blue jersey flies from one side of the rink to the other, and you can’t help but wish it’s Sungchan.

It might just be fate, for your crush was there, with a hockey stick, playing around and doing all kinds of tricks with the puck.

You are once again, blow away at his skills, eyes traveling with him and observing every move he makes. It’s 8:45 pm, just 2 hours before the rink closes for the day. You thought you were the only one planning on training this evening.

You take in a deep breath, mentally preparing yourself for some awkward moments, before placing your duffle bag on the benches.

Just as you step on the ice with your skates, Sungchan turns around, and is shocked to see you on the ice with him. He instantly loses focus and topples over suddenly, causing both him and you to gasp.

“Oh my god! Are you okay?”

As your voice gets clearer and closer, the boy feels his heart start to shake, and the same feeling of when you fell on the ice fluttering within his body.

“Y-yeah! I’m fine, r-really,”

Your expressions still twist in worry, and despite your mind freaking out and not knowing what to do, you still offer him a hand.

It feels like strikes of electricity or sparks running through your body as Sungchan’s cold, gloved hand envelops yours. You tug him upward gently, your heart beating in your ears loudly like drums.

Sungchan sends you an awkward, shy smile, one that you reciprocate with just as much nervousness shading it. Despite being in an ice rink, with literally just a shirt and yoga pants, you’re burning up. You haven’t even warmed up yet.

You mutually, but silently, agree to split the ice, the right side for you, the left for Sungchan.

Youreally can’t help but sneak a few glances at him as he practices, sometimes even going as far as staring without realizing. It’s not like it’s too easy for him either, your movements are so graceful and full of effort, he can feel the hard work radiate off of you. Many times did you want to help each other when one fell, but decided not to since it’s so common for people on the ice.

At some point of the individual practice, Sungchan accidentally hits his puck all the way to your side. He internally panics, hesitating to go in your zone to take the puck. The second he’s taking a step into your side, the puck is flying back in front of him.

Alarmed, Sungchan’s head whips up, shocked and very much delighted to see you, with a bright smile on your face and sparkling eyes.

He’s stunned. How could someone so perfect, suddenly become even better?

“Bring it on, Jung!”

A smile finds itself instinctively on Sungchan’s lips, before he’s retrieving the puck again and dribbling it around. Your confidence starts to waver at his determined stare, instead a chill of excitement running through your body.

Before you know it, you’re chasing Sungchan around the ice, attempting to steal the puck from him. It’s of course, not that easy, for someone who hasn’t played since the 8th grade. Though, you still impress your crush a lot, with your speed and stamina, you could train to be a hockey player.

The silent playfulness is turned vocal, with laughs and groans whenever one falls or fails to steal the puck. You can barely pick up the pace because of how much you’ve laughed at this point, just tagging along behind Sungchan as he teasingly tells you to catch up.

At last, you have a chance to steal the puck. Without any hesitation, you skate faster, and swerve the puck your way. The way your stick clashed with Sungchan’s made him shocked, not to mention your speed and swiftness too.

Sungchan is racing after you, ready to take the puck back to his possession, but he’s too late, you’ve hit, and it goes straight into the goalpost.

With a breathy laugh, you throw your hands into the air, and throw Sungchan a big, proud grin. He only pants with a smile, and gives you a much appreciated thumbs up.

“How are you so good?” At the question your ego is nibbling on, you smirk smugly and shrug, “I used to play ice hockey a lot with my dad and cousins.”

You get the puck back from the goal, and start dribbling it around the rink with skill. Oblivious to the adoring loom Sungchan gives your way, you attempt to shoot the puck at him. He catches it with no problem, “You’re so damn cool,”

At that, you slip painfully onto your back.

You lay no mind though, sitting straight back up and staring at your crush with big, surprised eyes, “W-what?”

Sungchan only laughs, wiping his forehead with his gloved hand, “Nevermind that,” he skates towards the exit of the ice, smiling shyly down at his skates.

Now’s a good time, right?

“H-hey,” you hum back a response, knowing your words would catch in your throat if you spoke. Sungchan bites his lip shyly, “You wanna go out sometime?” A soft gasp leaves your lips.

“L-like a date?”

“I mean, y-yeah. A date,”

Unwanted fireworks go on in your body, exploding with joy and giddiness from the suggestion of a date.

You both grin like fools once the other is out of sight, replaying whatever happened over and over on repeat.

There, in the ice, minutes after being asked out by your crush, you are unaware of the bright and fun future you have with him, unaware of the black hole you call love, falling deeper and deeper for him.

#knet bakery #knetmelodies #nct #nct imagines #nct fluff #nct drabbles #nct scenarios #jung sungchan #jung sungchan imagines #jung sungchan fluff #jung sungchan drabbles #jung sungchan scenarios #nct u #nct u imagines #nct u fluff #nct u drabbles #nct u scenarios #nct 2020

[coolnerdyandalone]

on FIMQ deleting her content and COVID-19 (and a gratuitous larry fic rec)

@freddiesmyqueen first of all queen i hope you’re doing ok although i know some shit must have gone down for you to delete/private list all your videos and i hope you know that the larry community supports you always. Also your talent is TRULY unmatched in the world of video editing - no one makes edits quite like you and that’s why your loss impacts the community so profoundly. 

secondly, i know at least i was hoping to turn to rewatching all of FIMQ’s videos while i’m being quarantined due to the coronavirus. and i’m willing to bet that i’m not the only one. this is a scary time and for people like me who feel profoundly alone right now, the only way for me to calm my nerves and fears is by reverting to the content and community that helped me feel not so alone when i was in middle and high school. For me, that looks like watching FIMQ videos and reading my favorite larry fanfics (which i will also link below).  because of this i thought it might be helpful to repost some links that were posted by @bluemoonlarryandkaylor for a signal boost (if my teeny-tiny account can be called a signal boost). 

link to a google drive with FIMQ videos: https://drive.google.com/drive/folders/1ONwfLOd_IYvAL5OUDqDb_LLgQsDpd9il

link to an acct with some FIMQ re-uploads: https://www.youtube.com/user/Joana3961/videos

link to FIMQ vids with spanish subtitles: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLIouodFhArMkQhOHxv2t2NgxTwl6KvXAT

and now if you want to look at some good old fashioned larry fics that are my ABSOLUTE faves and could 100% be actual novels/movies, keep reading:

And Then A Bit** by @infinitelymint aka the best fanfic ever written (basically larry fakes a relationship for publicity with each other and it could be cannon if you really wanted to hope upon hopes): https://archiveofourown.org/works/1415272/chapters/2972746 (159k)

“We’d like to give the fans what they want.” Magee states, placing his hand on the table in front of him and leaning forward. “We want to give them Larry Stylinson.”

Or, take a parallel universe where Louis and Harry were never together, mix in a two year hiatus and an impending comeback, pour in a dash of lost fans, two tablespoons of strong friendship and a Modest! employee with a good idea. Add a squeeze of pretending to be a couple, lots of kisses and a tattoo or two. Stir. Serve: the mother of all publicity stunts.

(aka Harry and Louis fake a relationship for publicity. Eventually it becomes a lot less fake and a lot more real.)

Escapade** by @haydolce aka the Jack McQueen fic: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4034197/chapters/9071932 (146k)

In the grand scheme of things, finding a date for a wedding should be no problem for Louis Tomlinson. He's rich. He's handsome. He's reasonably well behaved. But when the wedding is for his lifelong best friend (and former boyfriend), and is happening in under a month, finding a date for the ceremony and accompanying festivities becomes more of an adventure than he ever could have planned for.

California Sold** by @isthatyoularry​ : https://archiveofourown.org/works/5157680/chapters/11877494 (123k)

Notoriously closeted boyband member Harry Styles is famous on a global scale, meanwhile Louis, as his best friend, is back home in Manchester, living the typical life of a 24 year old. When Harry needs Louis with him in LA, a publicity stunt gone wrong changes their friendship forever.

A fake-relationship AU between two lifelong best friends.

Bring Your Body Baby (I Could Bring You Fame) by @theboyfriendstagram : https://archiveofourown.org/works/4263903/chapters/9652944 (84k)

Eighteen year old Harry Styles just graduated high school and landed a summer job as a waterboy for his favorite football team. His job description is simple: be ready to hand water and towels to players if needed. That didn’t seem to include Louis Tomlinson though, a twenty-three year old, recently transferred Paris Saint-German player, who seems to like making Harry’s job much more difficult than it has to be.

OR  

A self-indulgent AU that takes place over the summer of 2015. 18 year old Harry hates pining after people he can't have, and 23 year old footballer Louis loves flirting with people even though it never means anything.

Pull Me Under** by @zarah5 : https://archiveofourown.org/works/870766/chapters/1672104 (140k)

AU. As the first British footballer to come out at the prime of his career, it helps that Louis Tomlinson is in a long-term, committed relationship. Even if that relationship is fake. (Featuring Niall as Louis' favourite teammate, Liam as Louis' agent, and Zayn as Liam's boyfriend, who just happens to be good friends with one Harry Styles.) 

You You You** by @isthatyoularry : https://archiveofourown.org/works/846690/chapters/1617212 (137k)

“Infamous boybander leaves club together with unknown,” read the headline. Underneath were pictures of a boy with dark curls, green eyes and very tight pants. They both studied the article for a moment, reading it through quickly. “Is that…?” Louis frowned. That guy almost looked exactly like... "HOLY FUCKING SHIT!" "Louis," Niall said, looking absolutely fucked over. "You just fucked the most wanted guy on earth. You just fucked Harry Styles of One Direction."

Or, the one where Harry and Louis meet at a club and Louis takes Harry home, only for him to realize that the boy who just made him breakfast half naked is Harry Styles from One Direction.

Like an Endless Summer by @horsegirlharry : https://archiveofourown.org/works/11365494/chapters/25442085 (87k)

“You just wanna go fawn over Styles as soon as possible,” Zayn grumbles.

“I do not. Plus, he probably got ugly this year. Eighteen is an awkward time...I bet he’s got acne and one of those terrible fuckboy haircuts all the hipsters are getting these days, with the shaved sides? Just watch, the first year we’re gonna get any time together is gonna be the first year I don’t have a stupid crush on him.”

---

Or, Louis is a riding instructor at a summer camp, and Harry is a fellow counselor who he’s been successfully managing his crush on for the last two summers. That is, until Harry shows up this year leveled up and lethal, and all Louis’s formerly perfected veneer of nonchalance melts like a popsicle in the sun.

Three French Hems by @100percentsassy and @gloriaandrews : https://archiveofourown.org/works/3064493 (20k)

In which Louis is a designer at Burberry and Harry spends December wearing Lanvin… and Lanvin… and Lanvin.

The Dead of July aka the Marvel Fic by @whimsicule  : https://archiveofourown.org/works/3594570/chapters/7928520 (117k)

Being an Avenger means continuing to be Captain America and smiling and being honorable for the public and Harry does his best. But it doesn’t give him time to figure out who he is supposed to be once he takes off his uniform and puts the shield to the side. Just being Harry had always involved Louis, and Harry fears he doesn’t know how to exist without him.

or: Harry is Captain America, and Louis’ been dead for 70 years.

Gods & Monsters by  @mizzwilde : https://archiveofourown.org/works/2090982/chapters/4550871 (201k)

The instructions were simple: seduce and destroy Harry Styles. Not once did they discuss the option of Louis actually falling in love. So, naturally, that's exactly what he did.

Love is a Rebellious Bird aka LIARB aka the orchestra fic aka dont hum bolero by @100percentsassy and @gloriaandrews : https://archiveofourown.org/works/1162438/chapters/2362331 (135k)

AU in which the boys still make music. Louis is the concertmaster of the London Symphony Orchestra, Harry is the New! and Exciting! interim conductor/ex-cello prodigy who "has made Mozart cool again" according to Esquire Magazine (Louis hates him immediately, which is definitely why he internet stalked him in his dark bedroom late at night that one time), and Niall is the best. Zayn and Liam are around too.

Don't hum Bolero.

My English Love Affair** by @isthatyoularry​ : https://archiveofourown.org/works/1873962 (19k)

The thing about sleeping with a member of a famous indie band is that the inevitability of having a song written about you is most likely a hundred percent. The second thing is that in the end, nobody's supposed to find out it's about you.

The one where Harry writes a song about his English love affair and Louis sleeps with someone in White Eskimo and all he gets is a stupid song written about him.

Soft Hands, Fast Feet, Can’t Lose by @haydolce : https://archiveofourown.org/works/5799241/chapters/13366498 (113k)

American Uni AU. Harry Styles is a frat boy football star from the wealthy Styles Family athletic dynasty. A celebrity among football fans, he knows how to play, he knows how to party, and he knows how to fuck (all of which is well known among his legion of admirers).

Louis Tomlinson is a student and an athlete, but his similarities to Harry end there. Intelligent, focused, independent, and completely uninterested in Harry’s charms, Louis is an anomaly in a world ruled by football.

A bet about the pair, who might be more similar than they originally thought, brings them together. Shakespeare, ballet, Disney, football, library chats, running, accidental spooning, Daredevil and Domino’s Pizza all blend into one big friendship Frappucino, but who will win in the end?

Wild and Unruly aka the Cowboy fic by @100percentsassy and @gloriaandrews : https://archiveofourown.org/works/2723093/chapters/6099611 (124k)

Harry is a cowboy sitting on the biggest oil reservoir in Wyoming, and Louis is the paralegal assigned to pressure him into selling his land.

For As Long As I Can Remember (It’s Been December)** by @greenfeelings​ : https://archiveofourown.org/works/15051122/chapters/34892210 (128k)

After recovering from a severe accident that causes Harry to lose his memory of three years, he moves to London to start his life over as a star chef. Little does he know that when he falls in love with Louis at first sight, it’s not the first time they meet.

Featuring an unintentional game of hot and cold, Harry chasing memories that won’t come back, Louis burying himself in work to try and forget what he can’t forget, Liam being torn between two of his best friends, Zayn as a moral compass and Niall saving the day with good music and brutal honesty.

the boys of fall** aka the american football fic by @godgavemelou​ : https://archiveofourown.org/works/5443037 (21k)

“And everyone, this is Harry Styles. He’s going to be our starting quarterback this year.”

Louis looks at him, the tall and lanky Harry Styles, and takes it all in. He’s got hair to his shoulders that curls at the ends, tattoos all down his arms, and a bright smile on his face as the team cheers him on. He’s lean and fit, and absolutely beautiful, and Louis hates him to the core.

OR an american football au where the boys play for the university of tennessee, and harry and louis quite hate each other.

** indicates that the fic is a log-in required fic, but if you want the pdf i can send it to you

#FIMQ #freddieismyqueen #freddiesmyqueen #larry #Larry Stylinson #larry proof #LARRY IS REAL #Larry theory #covid2019 #covid_19 #coronavirus #quarantine #loneliness #alone #not alone #community #larry community #larry videos #larry fic #larry fanfiction #larry fanfic rec #larry fic rec #fic rec

[applepiry]

Karasuno University (Chap 1)

Chapter One - How you became the Boys College Volleyball Club’s Second Manager

“College AU - Karasuno University”

Short Fem!Reader x Will Have Multiple Partners

Contains: Jealously? Other parts will have other key words but this is just kind of a first meeting 

WC: 2.4k+

Y/N info: 

Freshman (18), 5’1 (154 cm), hair that can be put into styles (trying to be as non descriptive with it as i can be!), large chested (D and up), thick thighed, extremely quick for short bursts (can't jump or run for long distances though)

History Major with Art Minor; wants to be a teacher or museum director

Was Manager/Club Advisor for Art Club starting second year due to the dedication she showed the third and second years during first year

Has a mother, father, and two older brothers 

“L/N B#2” is in 3rd yr at Nekoma Uni (21) 

“L/N B#1” is already married with twin girls, he is a Associate Lawyer in Tokyo (27) 

(B#2 lives with him while Y/N lives with parents in Miyagi)

Parents own a bookstore with a small cafe “Cozy Nook” which belonged to grandparents but they needed help so YN and your parents moved back this year.

YN lives in the apartment above the store, and her parents live in the house behind it.

Childhood friends with Kiyoko Shimizu. Back in Middle School you were classmates with Tadashi Yamaguchi.

Moved from Miyagi to Tokyo, Nekoma High, during High School due to fathers job.

Other Notes: All the boys are at least 3-4 inches taller than they were during HS. 

I have a headcanon that Tanaka and Noya’s intense possessiveness quirk transferred over to Hinata haha (He was similar with Yachi after all)

Haikyu Masterlist 

-----------------------------------------------

How you met the Karasuno Universities Boy’s Volleyball Team… And became Manager in Training

Monday

Your first day at Karasuno University was going decently, going through your day without much interest until lunch when you ran into your childhood friend, Kiyoko Shimizu, who had basically been your big sister. You two had been from the same neighborhood as children, and she was friends with your second oldest brother. You had formed a quick attachment to her, since she was much nicer to you than your brother was. She had been the manager of the Boys Volleyball Club back in high school, and apparently was here at the University as well. 

She asked to catch up, and to meet her after practice had ended. You eagerly agreed, and knew you’d show up a little early to catch a glance at the surely hot volleyball boys. You hadn’t paid any attention back in high school aside from whether they won or lost, due to your own club activities, but you loved watching Volleyball. You actually weren’t too bad at it during PE, either. Surprisingly for someone so short, you were very quick when you wanted to be and were good at diving, since your plush chest and thighs often padded your slides.

After your last class, you went to the library to start on homework you’d already gotten. Once you had finished it, you looked at your phone and chewed on your lip as you noticed a text from Kiyoko, who let you know that practice would end around 7:00. Looking at the time, it was 6:00, and you figured it’d be a good time to head over. Packing up your stuff and slinging the bag across your shoulder, you head towards the boy volleyball’s practice gym. 

Sighing to yourself, you’re not really sure what to expect, having never met any of them. Sure, she had told you all about them over text and phone calls but you never had any faces to match up to the stories, then when she had graduated you hadn’t heard anything the last two years about the club. You had become the Manager for your own club, Art Club, second year, so unfortunately had been too busy to even entertain the idea of meeting any of them during high school. 

Plus, back then, you had hidden yourself behind glasses (whether you needed them or not), baggier clothing than needed and childish hairstyles, not wanting to draw attention to yourself. You had lacked the confidence to meet any boys, and honestly all boys did was pick on you. But, since then you had dedicated yourself to working on being so self conscious, learning to love your body and self after becoming Manager at the Art Club. Having so many people who depended on you and thought you were amazing was a really great confidence booster.

Getting to the gym at 6:40 due to your rather short legs and the gym being all the way across campus, you hear the rapid squeaking of tennis shoes from outside the door. Slowly, you open the door and crack it open, causing it to creak from the movement. Instantly, you feel eyes snap towards you, hearing a ball slap against the ground at the same time your eyes look up, seeing nearly the entire gym of boys staring at the door. At you. 

All of a sudden you see red, but not in the “im angry” way, your vision is literally filled with red-orange hair.

“Hi! Who are you?!” his happy voice fills your ears, causing you to snap out of your trance and stumble backwards.

“O-Oh, hello,” you stutter out and grasp at your bag, biting the inside of your lip. “I’m L/N, I’m here to see Kiyoko-nee-chan?” you say, trying to find her but the boy in front of you was tall enough to block your view. Not a shock, considering you’re likely the shortest college freshman ever. 

“Kiyoko?” he repeats, then turns and calls for her, “Kiyoko-senpai! There’s someone here to see you!”

Once he turns his shoulder, you can see nearly everyone in the gym, your eyes scanning over all the tall men. You nearly choke when you see most of them, well over a foot taller than you easily. Your eyes finally land on Kiyoko and you sprint towards her, across the gym in the blink of an eye. 

“Woah,” the red head murmurs from the door.

“Kiyoko-nee-chan!” you whine, grabbing onto her for dear life. You had not mentally prepared yourself for so many tall men. Sure, your brothers and dad were tall but there were only three of them. You had only met a handful of guys unrelated to you this large before, as you tended to just avoid men as a whole.

She smiles softly and gently pats your hair, “I told you I would text you when I was done,” she murmured softly.

“It’s getting dark outside,” you murmur to her.

“Woah, that was some dash you did!” said a man with a deep tenor voice. Kiyoko quickly introduced Daichi Sawamura, the Captain of the team. You bowed, thanking and apologizing to him for interrupting their practice and allowing it. He waved it off, saying it was nothing since Kiyoko had mentioned you’d likely be stopping by. This confused you, making you tilt your head. What had he meant by that?

“Wait, wait, who is this that knows our beautiful Kiyoko!?” one of the boys says and your eyes land on a buzzed headed boy who looked like a delinquent. 

“Yeah, yeah! Who?” says one of the shortest- no definitely the shortest- of the bunch with spiky hair, bouncing around just like the buzz-cut boy.

“Oh.. everyone, this is my childhood friend, F/N L/N-chan,” Kiyoko’s soft voice somehow fills the gymnasium and they all watch you with interest. “She’s back in town after having been in Tokyo for the last three years,” she added.

“Childhood friend?! What was in the water over there!?” the buzzed boy wonders loudly. 

“Right?!” says the short one, “She’s just as beautiful as our Kiyoko!” he adds as he nudges the boy beside him.

Your face gets hot, making you look down in embarrassment, “T-Thank you, s-senpai’s…” you murmur shyly to them both when you realize they’re complimenting you.

Both boys blink and stare at you for a moment before they suddenly begin screaming and running around the gym. “DID YOU HEAR THAT?!” “SHE CALLED ME SENPAI!” you hear the boys excitement in each statement, but you’re not quite sure why they’re so excited. You had only been being polite.

The orange haired boy is in front of you again with a large smile, holding out his hand. “I’m Shoyo Hinata!” he chirped happily. “Wait, did Kiyoko-senpai say you.. went to Tokyo for high school? Which one?” he wondered, tilting his head.

You glance at Kiyoko for a moment and she nods, encouraging you to make friends. You look back at the other, who is a good 20 cm taller than you, while most of the others easily hit 30-40 cm taller, aside from the other short one who perhaps was only 15 cm taller. You take his hand, noting how much larger it is than your own. 

“Nice to meet you… Yes, I did, I went to Nekoma...” you nearly whisper, looking into his big brown eyes. They flicker away from you when Daichi begins to speak. You realize you’re still holding Hinata’s hand, and he realizes as well as you both quickly pull away, both looking at the floor in embarrassment. He didn’t get a chance to reply before Daichi spoke.

“Hey team! Come meet L/N-chan!” Daichi said, surprising you. “Kiyoko wants to train her to be the next manager!” he told everyone. 

You blinked, looking up at Kiyoko, confused. She smiled her sweet small smile and nodded, “Want to?” she wondered quietly. “I know you know a lot about volleyball…” she added. She quickly explained that it was easier with two managers, and their other manager, Yachi-chan, had gone to Tokyo for college, which left them with an open spot.

You thought about it as the boys all gathered around to meet you. Finally, you nodded, a bit excited to try this out. Kiyoko smiled a bit wider than usual and hugged you tightly. You hugged her back, forgetting all the boys watching the pair of you. When she pulled away, you remembered, your face getting hot again as you fidgeted a bit. 

Turning to the team, you bowed, “I’m F/N L/N, pleased to meet all of you!” you do your best to be enthusiastic, keeping your head bowed for a moment before finally lifting your head.

Each of the boys introduces themselves, save from Daichi and Shoyo. Yu Nishinoya and Ryunosuke Tanaka getting rather close to you when they introduce themselves. Koshi Sugawara pulls them away and apologizes before introducing himself with a sweet smile.

You end up recognizing Tadashi Yamaguchi, as the two of you had been in the same class during middle school, and also had a few classes together this year as well. When meeting his giant of a friend, Kei Tsukishima, you nearly fell back just trying to look at his face. 

Asahi Azumane introduces himself rather shyly, while Chikara Ennoshita, Hisashi Kinoshita and Kazuhito Narita are all quick and kind. Chikara mentions he’s looking forward to working with you, which makes you fidget nervously with your nails. The last one to introduce himself comes up to you, his body movements stiff as he holds out his hand to you, saying his name was Tobio Kageyama. 

Tanaka and Nishinoya are dancing around like idiots, both of them excited to have another pretty girl around all the time. You let out a soft laugh when Hinata joined them, everyone staring at you in surprise for a moment. Your face heated up, shifting a bit as you got closer to Kiyoko. It was definitely going to be an adjustment getting used to the rowdy boys. 

Daichi got everyone to start cleaning up, while you, Kiyoko and Coach Ukai started talking about all the things that would go along with learning to be a manager. Since Kiyoko was still here, you’d have less responsibilities but they did expect you to help out whenever asked. You promised them both you’d do your best. 

-------------------------------------

“Hey, hey, LN, what was that crazy quick run before?! It was like Zoom!” Hinata said from behind you, causing you to turn to greet him. 

“Oh, yeah! I’ve only ever met Sho who was that fast! Like whoosh!” Nishinoya chimed in, appearing seemingly out of thin air.

“O-Oh, well, It’s only in short bursts and I.. erm, can’t do it much else…” you tell them with a soft nervous laugh. “I’m not that athletic, erm, but I do like Volleyball! I watch games all the time, and erm, I can toss a ball pretty okay!” you explain, tightening your hands into fists as you hyped yourself up, trying to push off those nervous jitters. Squeezing your hands close to your chest, you look up at the two before speaking again, “I’m going to do my best!” 

Nishinoya was biting his jersey, yanking at it as he nearly screamed, “You’re so cute!” his voice sounding strained.

Tanaka appeared behind Nishinoya and grinned, “She really is!” 

Hinata just looked away, but his bright red cheeks betrayed his thoughts. 

Daichi appeared next to you and gently placed a hand on your shoulder, “You’ll get used to them. They’re this way with Kiyoko too,” he said, his voice so gentle and yet so deep. 

You smiled sweetly at him and nodded, “Thank you for that, Sawamura-senpai.” 

“Daichi is fine, no need to be so formal,” he laughed. He gently pats your shoulder and leaves after that, the group gathering to go over the day's events since it was only their first practice this year together. 

They mentioned how it felt to have the old gang all back together, and how they couldn’t wait to get to the College Nationals. You were a bit surprised at how focused and intense all of them looked. However, it was quickly overtaken by pride for your new club.

Once the meeting was over, Kiyoko offered to drive you home, telling you she needed to get changed and she’d meet you back here. Standing near the gym, you lean against a pole and fidget with your phone as you wait for her.

“Hey, LN-chan!” you turned to see Tadashi, panting softly as he ran towards you. 

“Oh, hey, Yamaguchi!” you say happily, “I had totally forgotten you played Volleyball. I was surprised to see you,” you tell him.

“Same! I had no idea you knew Shimizu-senpai!” he said, nervously fidgeting with his bag. He seemed to be unsure what to say.

“Hey, should we exchange emails?” you ask, holding out your phone and opening it, ready to exchange information. His face lights up and he nods, tapping his phone against yours as the information transfers. Looking up, you see the tall blond behind him, staring at you, your eyes widening a bit, “Do.. you want to, too?” you wonder, tilting your head.

“Tch, no,” he snaps, his head quickly turning away as he begins to stride off.

“S-Sorry about Tsukki! Let’s h-hang out later,” Tadashi stutters out nervously before running off after his giant friend.

“What’s his problem?” you grumble. 

“He’ll need to warm up to you,” a deep voice you recognize as Kageyama, standing there near the door.

“Oh, hey Kageyama,” you say, blinking in surprise.

“Can I get your info, too?!” you hear, your eyes landing on Hinata as he pops out from behind Kageyama. Where had he come from? But, you smile and nod, tapping your phone against his as the information transfers and saves. “T-Thanks!” he says, his eyes sparkling and wide.

“M-Me too!” Kageyama says, his voice stiff and formal, even if you are the same age.

“Us too!” “Yeah don’t leave out your senpai!” Tanaka and Nishinoya come around the corner, the two of them holding out their phones as they jog towards you. 

After exchanging with them, Kiyoko comes back, and you finally make your leave with Kiyoko. With lots of waves and enthusiastic goodbyes. 

Once in her car, she tells you a bit more about the boys and what the team is striving for as she drives you home, and you take all of it in, excited and nervous for everything that this new opportunity would bring.

Next Part

#haikyuu!! #story #original story #haikyu college au #haikyuu college au #college au #kageyama tobio #kiyoko shimizu #daichi sawamura #karasuno university #hinata shoyo #nishinoya yu #tanaka ryunosuke #asahi azumane #koshi sugawara #haikyu x reader #haikyu x y/n #haikyu x you #applepiry #applepiry.content

[my-fanfic-library]

Hello lovely!! Would you mind doing headcanons for Professor!Claes x reader? Maybe he teaches history or something like that and you both have a nice lil affair going on after a while. I saw your tags on that one gif set and now that's all I can think about 👀

This is gonna be the only ask I answer today but holy shit I haven’t stopped thinking about this in like 24 hours

K so

Claes is most definitely a history lecturer

I don’t know why but I imagine his entire class to be similar to Indiana Jones’

Just a bunch of girls looking at him like the heart eyes emoji

Anywho, Claes is like the coolest lecturer in the world

He’s really laid back and he likes to take the piss out of people

He also handles a lot of seminar groups as well

Which is how you meet

He saw you in the first lecture and was kinda like “wow cute” but obviously nothing could happen

But when you come to his seminar group

And start bombarding him with question after question and disproving the content he had taught you so far,

L o v e

And obviously you are totally in love with him too

This tall, handsome man teaching your favourite subject, with the loveliest accent in the world

You stay after the seminar to talk to him

And he’s blown away by how much you actually know

“I’m looking forward to teaching you, Miss [Last], I think we’re going to get into a few heated moments if you keep attempting to disprove my work.”

You thought he meant arguments

He did not

You always make sure to ask a question if he invites the class to, because it makes things less awkward

And you always have a question or two at the end of the lecture

He can’t believe he’s got this golden student

And he uses you as an example all the time

“Why can’t you guys be as enthusiastic as [First]?”

Stuff like that

It kinda becomes obvious to both yourself and everyone else that Professor Bang has quite a soft spot for you

Some girls, despite being in their early 20s give you nasty looks

You respond by sitting next to Claes in your seminar the next day

And doing no work and getting into no trouble for it

Instead you talk about Denmark

Because you’re curious about his home country

It is this seminar

During the middle of your first year

That Claes just falls head over heels for you

But it’s

F O R B I D D E N

Which makes it all the sweeter

Later that year, about two weeks before the exam, you show up at his office just as he’s about to leave

“What’s the matter?”

Immediately you just burst into tears and he has no clue what to do

So he does what he thinks best

He pulls you into him and you just stand there sobbing into him for like a solid five minutes unable to make a coherent sentence in your sudden outburst

When you’re calming down, he brings you into his office and sits you down and is all “ok so what the fuck is going on?”

You explain that you’re just too overwhelmed with everything and that you don’t feel ready for the exam

So he offers one to one tutoring up until the exam (so for two weeks, you’d visit him after class and you’d sit for like an hour and go through everything you didn’t get)

Turns out you knew a lot more than what you thought

The more time that Claes spends with you, the more he wants.

So. Much. Tension.

Because you want it, and so does he, but you’re both oblivious and thinking about how wrong it is

So nothing happens except for a few gazes, a few lingering touches

He’s actually pretty gutted the day of the exam when he realises you won’t be coming back for some secret time with him

He spends his entire summer thinking about you

Wondering if you’ll make it into his class

When he finds out you are, booyyyyy is so happy

He doesn’t know why but on the first day of classes, he finds himself dressing up a bit. Styling his hair, throwing on his glasses, a soft scarf, leaving the first two buttons of his shirt undone

He doesn’t even know if he’ll see you today but fuck

And he does

Your complexion is glowing after so many months in the sun and the heat

Your hair grew out a bit

You look angelic

He finds himself unable to concentrate and keeps fumbling over his words for the whole lecture

Because you decided to sit at the front and

He keeps looking at you

And your eyes never leave him

Because he looks so good?

You couldn’t remember when he looked so fucking delicious

After the lecture, he asks you to stay and wait for a moment and the room clears out

He doesn’t know why he’s doing this but

“Did you have a good summer?”

“Yeah, I guess. We went to Majorca for four weeks and-“

“I missed you.”

“Oh, that’s... Professor Bang-“

“It’s Claes.”

You literally have 0 clue how to answer that

Your mind is spinning

He missed you?

He wants you to call him by his first name?

Your heart is doing leaps and bounds by this point

He’s looking at you differently, licking his lips

And then they’re on yours

It’s hungry - it’s different

Your hands are in his hair, on his neck, you’re leaping into his arms, wrapping your legs around him and he’s driving you into the desk

The next day, you keep looking at that spot, where someone’s notebook is

You’re smirking, trying not to laugh because that poor person is writing right on the spot where you fucked your professor last night

Claes keeps looking at you and you know by his eyes that he wants you to stay after class

It ends and everyone leaves and the second the door shuts, you’re in his arms again

It’s a frenzy

Clothes off, and this time he’s got you arched over the desk, hands gripping into the chair behind it, ramming into you from behind.

And that is how it started

School nights, weekends, you’d find each other one way or another and you couldn’t get your hands off of each other

Post-sex cuddles

Where you just talk

He usually runs his hands through your hair, with the fondest smile on his face

It starts to get hard when other guys start to get interested in you

Because you can’t exactly tell anyone that you’re with someone - you’d get thrown out and Claes would lose his job

So, you have to play

You have to flirt back

Claes loses it

The sex gets rougher

The hickeys grow darker and bigger

One time, he got so frustrated that he sat you on the podium after a lecture and ate you out

He finds himself realising that he doesn’t just want to fuck you - he’s actually fallen in love with you

And you’re fairly sure that you’re in love with him

That summer, he whisks you off to Denmark

Best trip of your life???

He loves teaching you all the history of his home country, taking you everywhere he possibly can

Car sex

Sex on the beach

And even in a hidden corner of a museum

It’s like the honeymoon phase doesn’t end

And then the worst thing happens

One of your classmates is in Copenhagen for their own little trip

They see you with Claes in a cafe, kissing his cheek, holding his hand

They immediately report it (literally out of spite because who tf wouldn’t want to date Claes, come on, and they were high key jealous)

And when uni starts up again, a huge inquiry is undergoing

Both you and Claes are pretty much interrogated - they check your phones, they see if you have each other on social media, they check your emails, trying to find a n y t h i n g

And you agree afterwards that this can’t go on

It’s too risky to visit him outside of the university

And so it all has to stop

You’re a wreck

Because being with Claes was the happiest you had been in so long

You start dating someone new

And Claes almost quits

Your final year drags

Because you have to sit there

Looking at him

Being so close to him

But feeling the eyes of the other lecturer sent to sit in and watch and make sure no funny business was happening

One night, you go out and get just a little tipsy and find yourself at his home, throwing rocks at his bedroom window

He comes out and tells you to leave as much as it pains him to do so

You tell him you feel like dropping out, of you can’t have him then nothing matters

And he brings you inside

You don’t get any sleep, he fucks you over and over until your body is numb and your brain is nothing but a swirling mess of him

He ignores you after that

You find yourself transferred out of his classes and instead, you’re placed into professor Wells’ classes

You’re livid with him

How could he move you out of his classes after everything you’ve been through together?

You purposefully have him find you in public spaces with your new partner, a little closer than what would be accepted

He’s going stir crazy. He can’t stop thinking about the last night you spent together and how badly he needs to be with you again even if it costs him a job

Your graduation is suddenly upon you and it’s so bittersweet

You have finally gotten what you worked so hard for, but you will most likely never see Claes again now

Wrong

As you’re making your way off vampire for the last time, clutching your diploma, laughing with your friends, a voice calls your name

You turn, and he’s pushing past people to get to you

He reaches you and he has this dumb smile on his face, and then he says the stupidest yet most romantic thing

“Technically you’re not my student”

And he kisses you

In front of all of your friends, family, all of your former classmates, other teachers, everyone

He doesn’t even care

His hands are holding your face, pulling you close and you have to go on your tiptoes, in your damn heels, just to be able to wrap your arms around his neck

He promptly gets fired

But he doesn’t care because he’s waking up the next morning with you sleeping beside him and he feels like he’s won at life

#i think i went overboard with this one??? #Authors AU Hour #hi i like drama #lmao #claes bang #claes bang x reader #claes bang x you #claes bang fanfiction

[pochapal]

rank every year of the 2010s from best to worst i want some pochapal lore

[warning for discussion of my fucked up mental health and my myriad traumas. we’re really opening the pandora’s box here gang]

ok time for me to overshare on the internet again! super long post because i can’t shut up and you asked for it. anyway, by objective ranking: 

#1: 2012 - halcyon era, my personal peak. spent the whole year writing hunger games oc fics with my deviantart fanfiction besties whom i still think about all the time and always hope are having the best possible day. if you were here for this era understand i still hold you so closely and dearly in my heart <3. 

#2: 2013 - god i was such a good example of a human being back then. was the year my writing like actually took off and i had a healthy balance between creative stuff and a social life (said social life consisting of spending lunchtimes at school breaking into classrooms and discussing fandom shit with five other people. reading homestuck updates in the music room on one person’s really shaky mobile data...legendary). highlight of the year and maybe my life was in the april of 2013 when i got out of failing to submit a hard deadline essay by telling my english teacher i wrote a whole novel over the two week break and then producing said novel. god i wish i had that level of like. fucking confidence back me back then knew what i wanted and how to get it. 

#3: 2010 - the last year of childhood. i was 12 and played pokemon all the time with my friends and went places and had a moderately successful youtube channel and it didn’t matter that i was bullied so badly at school because i was basically high off life. summer of 2010 was so good specifically. i’d used to get the bus with a friend and go see movies and break into historical sites and get into normal childhood mayhem and maxed out my pokewalkers twice a month and i was buzzed because i had two (2) whole friendship groups to choose from and that was such a huge deal to me the terminal social outcast. it was so simple and carefree and even though everything and everyone involved in this era grew up to suck except for one specific person i kinda really miss it.

#4: 2018 - this was the first year i wasn’t depressed to the point of nonfunctioning. it was 20gayteen, i was on antidepressants, i was as close to thriving as i got at uni (going into town with people once a week, attending art and culture events, getting good grades across the board), i started to write for fun again, i got my cat whom i love dearly, i was exhibited in my uni’s city’s literature festival, GOD i actually nearly attended a pride event that year can you imagine. this year was basically my life’s second peak. miss getting the 8am train and daintily sipping on a cherry coke to keep me from passing out. wish this time could have lasted longer.

#5: 2019 - kinda absolute middle of the road year not for lack of anything happening but because the overwhelming amount of good and bad things cancelled each other out. so like there’s the fact that i was at the top of my uni game this year, was basically making the first steps into a professional writing career (covid i will never forgive you for killing all that dead </3), finally saved up enough to buy myself a gaming pc, and the summer after the homestuck epilogues, but equally 2019 was the start of the Pochapal Gender Fiasco which is by far the most horrible thing i am still currently undergoing and i burnt myself out mentally about halfway through the year (being stuck overnight in a hospital for a panic attack absolutely horrible horrible irredeemable) and then got like super death plague flu that i was sick with for three months (literally recovered less than a month before rona hit. god’s cruel karma.). so like...it kind of averaged out? the good shit was good but not as great as other years and the bad shit was awful but nowhere near as terrible as it could have been. gotta give a shoutout to 90% of my current mutual cohort for following me in 2019...omelette route gang make some noise !!

#6: 2014 - oof. this year essentially marked the start of a four year long downward mental health spiral because everything fell into awful alignment. i’d just turned 16, finished secondary school, had all my friends up and ditch me at once, was home alone for a whole summer, and was hit with Sudden Intense Body Image Issues that i couldn’t explain until uh. after very recent developments lmao. this one goes out to the me of july 2014 who did nothing but lay in bed and listen to the same two marina albums on a loop because fuck i’m attracted to men and also my facial and body hair are really starting to come in and if i think about this for too long i will literally kill myself because oh god i can’t handle getting older which is clearly and definitely the issue going on here. my brain fucking broke super hardcore and it’s a miracle that an overeating disorder was like the worst thing i walked away with. 

#7: 2015 - downward spiral year two!! i was so volatile this year it was such a mess. i was totally socially isolated after a brief stint of falling in with a group of people at the start of my first year of sixth form until january where in quick succession a) it turned out every single one of these people was friends with the person who sexually assaulted me whom i obviously had a lot of complicated feelings towards and b) baby’s first crush came out as bisexual but in the “women and also trans women” kind of way which tore me up so terribly in ways i couldn’t begin to understand. no words for the experience of seeing a girl kiss a boy and crying so hard at night you threw up because you could never be her no matter how much you wanted it. actually kinda get the sense what was going on there was bigger than just some crush lmao. then after that i was so mentally ill i basically attended school less than half the time and it was the only year in my life i failed my exams. i ended up having to resit my entire set of first year a level exams because jesus christ was i in such a bad way it was a miracle i even showed up to them. all i did was either have anxiety attacks or enter bedbound depressive slumps for weeks at a time. but it’s okay because it gets worse.

#8: 2016 - downward spiral act iii: the spiralling. prefacing this by saying that i actually had two whole good months (april - may) in that i was functioning enough to do my exams and finish school with decent grades. the rest was super extra mega terrible. my school attendance for year 13 dipped below 65% and literally the only thing that kept me from being kicked out was the fact that i was naturally smart at the subjects i took and also because the school would have a lot to answer for after letting me get to that state despite having a hefty file on how damaged i was. keep in mind every single part of this was fully untreated btw - i was just floundering around and letting it all fester. i spent three solid weeks going to school but locking myself in the bathroom all day every day and having mental health episodes then going home like nothing else happened only to continue the breakdown that night. then things got kicked into fucked up overdrive when i moved out to uni and was cut off from what little support structures i did have. it was so bad all i did was cry all the time and never went anywhere to the point where three separate sources recommended me to the wellbeing and crisis counselling service that i stopped going to after two sessions because i was fucked up in ways cbt techniques could not even touch. at least i tried to make an effort for the first two months of uni which like. good for me?

#9: 2017 - what lieth at the base of the spiral. helltrench year. i was at literal rock bottom. i stopped going to class, i didn’t hand in a single piece of work. i lied to my parents and would book trains each day only to go back to my student flat and sit there and contemplate suicide. like i would just slump on the floor in a catatonic state and vividly contemplate one of four or so ways i could end my own life. i only didn’t because i wanted to wait until the summer to collect my last student loan and transfer it to my parents as an apology for my death which obviously didn’t end up happening. honestly i can’t remember much of the first half of 2017 that’s how bad it was. i remember taking a gender studies class and the teacher made it Weird that i was the Only Male Student in the room and then she sent me a scolding email after i walked out halfway through a class and never returned. apparently i got into a lot of online discourse in this year but i don’t remember anything other than being put on a blocklist by the milkfic author over ace discourse which is funny if you have the context. mostly i just baited terfs and weirdo freaks to get them to say horrible things to me as what i guess amounts to some kind of digital self harm. anyway breaking point came in late august when i got kicked out of university and then nobody could ignore it any more so there was no choice left but for me to seek out help and recover enough to function which luckily i did. i really Do Not remember 2017. you could tell me anything about that year and i’d probably believe you.

#10: 2011 - extra circle of hell for this little fucked up gem of a year. on the surface it wasn’t actually that terrible, until the Summer 2011 Domino Effect Of Bad Shit. up until like may/june it was a pretty all right year! i was 13 and had a surprisingly successful youtube channel uploading pokemon soundfont remixes to an audience of i think ~350-400 subscribers at my peak? anyway then i got hit with the early summer triple combo of childhood friends moving away, cute and quirky sexual assault at the hands of a person in my friend group, and then having some Really Great and Super Appropriate interactions with adults on deviantart. like obviously there’s the actual ptsd-inducing event which totally disrupted and killed the person i was right up until that moment and reshaped every facet of my life for better or worse (there’s an alternate timeline where that didn’t happen and i got into electronic music and/or coding instead) but really it’s the events that followed in its wake which were kind of more fucked up. so like all of a sudden i was super aware of my body and me growing my hair out and being mistaken for a girl in class suddenly became this Less Innocent thing and i ended up spending hours overnight going to transgender questioning forums and looking up hrt timeline videos and having the wikipedia article on tracheal shaving saved because it was a life raft to me whose voice was imminently gonna deepen and i was simultaneously reeling with constant trauma flashbacks and the whole thing was so so fucked up. then i was on deviantart and i don’t remember exactly how but a small group of furry guys ten to fifteen years older than me started messaging me and encouraging and requesting me to produce nonsexual fetish stuff for them and talking to me about stuff like if i’d ever thought about growing up to be gay and i didn’t think anything of it for a long while because they called me a very talented writer and it felt so good to have someone be nice to me after being so alone and isolated for months on end. anyway the only reason i got out of that before it got bad was because they invited me to one of the big furry sites and i was weirded out because i thought it was a porn site and thinking about sexual stuff was a huge trauma trigger so i just ended up blocking them all and pretending like it didn’t happen. at the time half this shit didn’t bother me but in retrospect holy fuck 2011 was such a damaging year. to think if like three events didn’t happen i wouldn’t be the fucked up mess you see before you today.

god fuck this turned out super long but i’m not apologising because this was a therapeutic exercise for me and also constitutes as one of the biggest pochapal lore dumps of all time. come get your food or whatever.

#Anonymous #long post #read all of this if you have vested interest in knowing intimate details about my life or whatever

[complexgods-backup]

Isn't It Cliché? Chapter 2

Read chapter one here or on Ao3

Pairing: DaiSuga (Haikyuu!!)

Word Count: 2627

Warnings: very brief mention of alcohol and drug consumption, but nothing explicit

A/N: sorry for the late update, I know I said I would update regularly but life got in the way ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ I hope you enjoy this chapter!

The university building was huge, way bigger than his old one. Students were chattering away around him, some of them already deep into writing papers, exchanging notes, and sipping coffee. He missed this exact feeling of uni during break. He hadn’t had too many assignments due to his transfer, and the ones he did have were easy tasks, so he had the entire summer to do whatever he wanted, which was odd to him since he was so used to either working or revising during break.

He took out his timetable he thankfully remembered to print a few weeks prior, making his way to the classroom in which his first-class would take place.

“Oh, hi!” He heard a somewhat familiar voice call from behind him. He turned around to see who was talking. He was faced with a man he met on orientation day, whose name he had promptly forgotten. His hair was black and gelled up to the extreme, making him look like a rooster with some bedhead.

“Sugawara, right?” He asked, flashing him a toothy grin. “We met at orientation, I’m Kuroo Tetsurou.” Suga nodded, remembering how he charmed every single person at orientation. He had originally gone to welcome the newcomers since he was a second year, but once Suga said he was transferring and found out that he also studied Japanese Studies, Kuroo happily obliged to answer any questions about the university he might have.

“Ah yeah, apologies for forgetting your name, I won’t forget it again,” Suga said as he shook Kuroo’s hand in greeting.

“That’s absolutely fine, man. I understand it’s not easy to remember everything and everyone when moving into a new city. It’s cool that you’re studying Japanese Studies as well though! If you’re up for it, me and a couple other people are grabbing lunch later and you’re more than welcome to join!” Suga gladly accepted the invitation, feeling oddly reassured that someone as confident as Kuroo basically just took him in like that. He must’ve looked really lost.

The morning passed quite quickly, Suga only got lost once between classes, but everyone at the university was just so helpful and kind that it wasn’t that big of an issue. At lunchtime, he met Kuroo and his three friends at the bottom of the main stairs, smiling nervously at the strangers as Kuroo introduced them. The one whose hair probably had more gel in it than Kuroo was named Bokuto Koutarou, who was more than excited to meet Suga. The other two were calmer at greeting him, the shorter one with dark hair introduced himself as Akaashi Keiji, and the tall blonde quietly introduced himself as Tsukishima Kei. The conversation came almost naturally to them all as they made their way to the cafeteria, and Suga was thankful for how they did their best to include him in their conversations. Suga quickly noticed that Bokuto and Akaashi were closest and were most probably friends since at least middle school with how they spoke to and acted around each other, but everyone seemed to tease Bokuto relentlessly, reminding Suga of his own best friend. He should definitely send Asahi a text after lunch to see how he was holding up.

Suga quickly felt integrated into the friend group, cracking jokes with the rest of them as they ate the somewhat disgusting cafeteria food.

“This university is so fancy and expensive, can’t they at least make decent food?” Kuroo quipped, making the others nod in agreement.

“You’ve been saying that since last year. Besides, it’s better than whatever you can cook, Kuroo.” Tsukishima replied in a drawl, sounding almost bored.

“That’s not very nice of you, Tsukki-poo. I mean you’re not wrong but you shouldn’t say it.” Kuroo answered nonchalantly, ignoring the face of discomfort he made at the nickname.

“So Suga, why did you decide to move to Tokyo?” Akaashi asked, and suddenly everyone fell quiet, watching their new friend with intent.

“I didn’t like my old university, and I always wanted to move to Tokyo, so I figured why not,” Suga answered, trying to seem unfazed.

“Why didn’t you move for your first year then?” Bokuto asked, his eyes big and focussed intensely on Suga.

“Ah, well… My ex wanted me to stay close to our hometown, so I enrolled in our local university. We had a pretty bad breakup though so I was excited to move away.” He consciously left any pronouns out of the conversation, not ready to come out to his newfound friends, just in case. He grimaced at recalling the way he found out his ex-boyfriend was cheating on him and had been for two months before their breakup. After he had found out, he couldn’t get out of his hometown quicker.

“Ah. Makes sense. Oh well, there are lots of people here that we can hook you up with if you want.” Kuroo said in what Suga assumed to be a joke, but he thanked him for the offer anyway.

“Ah it’s fine, I’m not big on dating yet, my ex kinda messed me up, and I don’t know how I feel about one-night stands just yet.” The others nodded, understanding that he was done talking about it.

“Well, we’re all going to Kuroo’s house party he and his roommates are throwing at the end of the week, sort of like a beginning of the semester party. You’re very welcome to join us if you like!” Bokuto chimed in, to which Suga gladly agreed. He needed to check his schedule but getting drunk and/or high at university parties was something he desperately missed during the summer holidays.

After lunch, everyone went their separate ways, and Kuroo promised to text Suga the details of the party the day of. Before his last class of the day started, he sent Asahi a quick text, asking how he was holding up. He got a thumbs-up emoji back, meaning that he was surviving the day. Sugawara smiled as he put his phone back into his pocket and went into the classroom.

…

The day was over a lot quicker than Suga had anticipated, and he sent Asahi a text as he made his way back home.

Home in 20, give me a call if you feel like it!

He threw his coat and bag on the couch as he went into the kitchen to make a coffee. There was nothing Suga loved more than a cup of coffee after a long day. His ex often commented on how bad his caffeine addiction had gotten during his time at uni but he wasn’t in the picture anymore so why should he care? As he was waiting for Asahi to call, he sat by the window in his living room/bedroom, watching civilians pass by as he quietly sipped his coffee. The street he lived in was pretty busy, cars were always driving by and there were always people to observe. Suga loved watching the people crossing the street or running to the subway, were it businessmen, or parents with their children, trying to urge them from one side of the street to the other. Just as he was watching a mother on the phone, trying to get her kid’s attention who was attempting to run across the street when the light was red, his train of thought was interrupted by his phone buzzing.

“Hey Asahi,” he said after he swiped the screen of his phone to accept Asahi’s FaceTime call.

“So? How was your first day?” He asked excitedly, sipping his coffee and leaning against the window.

“It was so cool! The people were really nice and I’m going out for drinks with a few people later tonight!” Asahi sounded a lot more confident than the day before, which made Suga’s heart swell with pride. His best friend was never the best when it came to meeting new people, always worried that people would see him as a threat or too intimidating. His height and broad build were definitely assets to that, but his heart was so pure it was almost impossible not to love the man.

“Did you meet any cool fashionable people then?” Suga asked, which prompted Asahi to tell him all about his day and everyone he had met. Suga listened intently to his best friend’s words, not wanting to miss a single minute of what happened during his first day.

“Ah, I’m rambling again. How was your day?” Asahi asked after speaking for a while, and Suga couldn’t help but smile. Asahi always felt ashamed and somehow shy when he “talked too much,” even though Suga loved nothing more than to listen to whatever Asahi was passionate about. Asahi also knew this to some extent, but he still seemed to feel bad whenever he spoke for more than one minute at a time, thinking it was selfish of him, at least that’s what Asahi had told Suga when he asked his best friend about it.

“Ah no, it’s fine! I like hearing you talk. Besides, it was your first day of uni! That’s exciting! My day was good, I met a few new people and we’re also going to this party on Friday, so I’m looking forward to that!” Suga continued to tell Asahi about his day, in turn, making sure to not leave out any details. He really enjoyed these FaceTime calls with Asahi, something they decided to do more when Asahi was traveling with Nishinoya before he came back home to study and they couldn’t see each other as often as they were used to.

“So yeah, that’s about it from my end. I have work again after class tomorrow afternoon so I’ll probably not be on my phone too much, just so you know!”

“Ok, noted” Asahi answered, before continuing talking about random things.

“Oh by the way, Yuu said he’ll come back home in a few weeks!” Asahi said, his eyes practically shining in excitement. Suga grinned at that, knowing that maybe it might be a little less than that. Noya had wanted to surprise Asahi by coming back from his travels this week, two weeks earlier than planned and only Suga knew about it.

Noya had been traveling Europe for five months now, and although Asahi had joined him in the first month, he had to go home and work in order to afford uni and his apartment, which bummed Asahi out greatly. He and Noya had the most wholesome relationship in Suga’s opinion. Neither could live without the other, so long-distance kinda sucked for the both of them.

Asahi and Nishinoya were the classic “best friends that had feelings for each other since forever but never acted on it” until one day Suga had enough of the bullshit and made them confess to one another. At least that’s how Asahi and Noya put it, Suga thought of it as more of a “not-so-subtly locking them in a room until they confessed” sort of situation. Not his most graceful moment, he must admit, but they had been together for a year now and were completely and utterly in love with each other, it was cute but sickening to watch as a single person. Pushing the thought away, Suga grinned at the camera, nodding enthusiastically.

“I’m excited for you! I might try to come to visit for a weekend once Noya’s back, we can have a movie marathon weekend like we used to in high school,” Suga suggested and Asahi was practically glowing with excitement. The rest of the conversation was about Noya and his adventures in Europe until Asahi had to get ready for his night out with the new people he met at uni.

Suga decided to spend the night in a YouTube deep dive until he passed out, which was always a bad idea but at least he remembered to set an alarm this time.

Just as he had anticipated, he woke up extremely confused to his alarm, not remembering when he fell asleep. His laptop had since turned off due to lack of charging, but he had no time to care about that now, because he wanted to get to uni on time and he needed to remember to take his work clothes with him, so he tried to get out of bed at least half an hour before he had to leave. He was in a bad mood, probably due to his YouTube deep dive last night, and he couldn’t wait to go back to bed the second he had to leave the warm and safe confines of his sheets. He got dressed in a hurry, realising he only had ten minutes before he had to leave.

The morning was rather uneventful, and Suga did his best to seem as chipper as he had been the day before, despite his foul mood. Kuroo had invited him to lunch again, but he declined with a smile and an apology. He knew he would have to go to work at 1 pm and there would be no time for him to eat in the cafeteria. Suga appreciated Kuroo’s kindness and understanding as he turned away to listen to the professor, leaving Suga to his notes. He decided to eat his lunch in the break room at work before his shift started in order to ensure he would be on time.

That day he worked the orders, and since it was a weekday before 4 pm, he was left with one other coworker who was taking orders. He hadn’t met this colleague before but he seemed very intense and focused on his work. He had introduced himself earlier that afternoon as Kageyama Tobio and promptly walked off to start his shift. Suga wasn’t phased though, knowing that he probably had trouble opening up to people, so he decided to not overwhelm him with conversation. They worked surprisingly well together and Suga enjoyed working quietly, listening to the playlist that was playing that day. Sometimes he’d listen in to other people’s fleeting conversations as they waited for their orders, the snippets he caught always entertained him as he wondered what the rest of the conversation was about. He knew that that was probably not appropriate but he was too curious about other people’s lives not to eavesdrop. Right before 4 pm, another coworker joined him and Kageyama, introducing himself as Ennoshita Chikara. He seemed like an effective and good worker, and Suga wished he had more time to get acquainted with him but unfortunately, rush hour had started so they were too busy making orders. He had an inkling that he and Ennoshita would get along pretty well though, so he made sure he would talk to the man more when they had another shift together.

Even though Suga had a 6-hour shift, the afternoon went by in a blur and he didn’t notice how much his back ached from being on his feet non-stop during that time until he arrived at his apartment. He decided to put off homework until he had his bath and some dinner, truly exhausted from his day. He checked his phone as the water poured into the tub, texting Asahi that he was alright and that he would call after his classes the next day, too tired to keep a conversation tonight. He doubted whether or not he would be able to do his homework that night, but he figured he could just do it the next day instead, so he sunk into the hot water wondering what kind of tv show he wanted to watch before bed. He deserved some self-care as well from time to time even if that self-care took the form of eating instant ramen and watching Netflix.

#haikyuu fanfic #hq fanfic #daisuga #daisuga fanfic #hq #my writing

[ravenforce]

Ithaca Pt. 1

Word Count: 2928

Warning/s: None, right now. 

A/N: The O8 x Avengers College Au crossover fic you didn’t ask for is here, or at least the first part of it. I would first like to explain that Ithaca will be Avengers arc of this crossover. Manhattan will be the O8 parts. Secondly, I would like to apologize for being away all the time. December just really knocks the life out of me, to be honest. I’m not even playing a lot of video games as compared to the end of November but I’m still always tired. Anyway, I’m sorry. Lastly, as I said before, this fic is the wild and ambitious. So I would apologize in advance if details get inconsistent. 

PS. I would really love to hear your feed. Hit my inbox or the comments. xx

PSS. No pairing yet. Pairings will unfold as the story goes. 

Part 2 | 3 | 4 | 5

***

Looking at your one backpack sitting idly in front of you outside the JFK, waiting for your best friend Maria to pick you up. You realized it’s been too long since you’ve been home. Home being where Maria is. She was adopted by Nick when you were thirteen. Giving you five years alone in the system, jumping from one foster home to another until you were old enough to take care of yourself.

You were never resentful that Maria got adopted and you never did. You were always too smart and too smart-mouth to be adopted anyway. You also love her too much to begrudge her of anything. Besides, she never stopped being your best friend even after she moved to New York. You two still talked every day, you both still know the ins and outs of each other lives even though you’re a few states or even a coast apart.

When you turned eighteen, you run away from foster care and graduated with your first degree in Literature and Mathematics at MIT. That’s right, after Maria left, you poured your energy into school effectively accelerating you to university. Now at 21, you decided to give in to Maria’s plea for you to come home and continue your education at Cornell University where she’s attending. Having finished all your minor classes, you’re able to transfer at Cornell as a third-year Art student.

“Y/N!!!!”

You looked to your right to see Maria running towards you. Thanks to all the time you spent doing Muay Thai, you were able to keep your balance after Maria launched herself on your person.

“Y/N,” she muttered against your hair. By the watery quality of her voice, you have no doubt that she’s actually tearing up in your arms.

“Hey,” you said a little breathlessly before wrapping your arms around her tighter.

Maria pulled away after a minute and you’re able to see her tear-stained face and beautiful smile. She runs her eyes all over your face and down to your body to assess your physical well-being.

“God, you look so good,” she said, content that you didn’t lie to her when you said you did learn how to cook for yourself and not rely on takeaway food forever.

“Thank you. You look amazing too.” Not that Maria ever looks anything short of magnificent anyway. Even when you two were still at the orphanage wearing hand-me-down clothes, she looked beautiful.

Maria blushed profusely before tugging you out of the airport and towards the parking lot. It was so good to have her hold your hand again and listen to her speaking voice in person after being apart for so long.

“What?” she asked when she noticed you staring at her after you both got inside her car.

You smiled softly. “Nothing, I just missed you. Missed this,” you said and Maria understood.

“I miss you too, silly,” she said before unbuckling her seat belt and leaning against her console to kiss your cheeks.

It was then your turn to blush. When she noticed it, she laughed remembering how you hate public displays of affection so much. Such a cool guy.

“Stop laughing,” you said with a pout, which prompted her to laugh harder as she backed out of the parking lot.

***

The drive from the airport to Ithaca took a while but you and Maria didn’t mind. You spent the rest of the drive back talking about literally everything. You weren’t surprised when Maria pulled up a tall building at the City Center. After all, she did tell you she was renting at a luxury apartment smack in the middle of busy Ithaca. What surprised you was Nick being there to wrap you up in a hug the moment you step inside the apartment.

“Y/N!!!” he yelled before hugging you.

You just had to chuckle at how he and Maria greeted you in the exact same way. 

“Hey, Nick,” you said before hugging him back. “What are you doing here?” 

Nick pulled back and grinned at you. “I couldn’t pass up the opportunity to see you. Besides, Maria needed help cleaning up,” he explained solemnly.

“Oh Nick, let’s give her the house tour before you tell her how messy I have been,” Maria said emerging from her bedroom wearing a fresh shirt.

The layout of the house is pretty cut-through. The first thing you will see when you enter the apartment is the modern kitchen attached to a small living room and a balcony on the far side. To the right is the shoe closet, and the hallway leading to a small storage room, a common bathroom, and the bedrooms.

“And this will be your bedroom,” Maria said after opening the second door to your left.

You can tell Nick and Maria took the time to customize your room to give you the best comfort available the moment you flopped down the bed. The sheet smelled fresh off the laundry, and the bed was the softest you ever slept in. Maria gave you literally five seconds to have the bed all to yourself before she launched herself next to you, and tugging you against her. Nick watched you two cuddle and giggle like a pair of five years old before he decides he has seen enough.

“Alright children, I’ll step out for a while to get us some food. Both of you freshen up before dinner,” Nick said from the doorway.

“Yes dad!” you both yelled at the same time. Nick shook his head with a smile before leaving you two alone.

When you heard the apartment door closed, you burrowed your head back against Maria’s neck and cuddled her as your life depended on it.

“Welcome home,” she whispered before kissing the crown of your head.

***

Between settling in, and Maria excitedly showing you around town, the weekend was a blur. You woke up Monday morning with no Maria but a sweet little note on your breakfast telling you that she had to go to school without you because she has early morning swimming practice. You wished to go to school together like old times but you are running on a different schedule than Maria. You sat down and savored the tasty ensemble of crispy bacon, perfectly poached eggs, toasts and black coffee that your best friend made you while scrolling through your phone to check on your schedule again. 

When you arrived at school with plenty of time to spare to find your classroom. The last thing you want to be on your first day is to be late. You were checking your phone again for your schedule when someone spoke in front of you. 

“Y/N Y/L/N?”

When you looked up, you had to restrain yourself from blinking twice because there stood in front of you is probably the most beautiful human you’ve ever laid eyes on. You take back what you said about being late on your first day. The last thing you want to be on your first day in uni is to have gay panic in front of your new school mate, who you’ll probably see often if the Head Girl pin on her lapel is anything to go by. 

You cleared your throat. “Who’s asking?” you managed to ask as casual as possible. 

“Natasha Romanoff, Student Council President,” she introduced herself politely while extending out her hand. “Pleasure to meet you.”

You smiled shyly and fought the blush that’s creeping up under your shirt. “Pleasure is all mine,” you said softly. 

Natasha looked at you for a second before relaxing her posture and smiling. “I’m here to give you the school tour,” she explained before pulling the door, prompting you to walk with her.

Natasha’s very leisurely phase made you wonder if you’ll ever make it in time for the first period. You glanced at your watch. 

“Oh,” Natasha gasped and frowned. “Am I boring you?” she asked quietly. 

“What?!” you exclaimed, earning a few curious looks from students at the hall.

Nat didn’t bother to pay them any attention. She’s looking only at you. “No, no, you’re not boring. I was just wondering if I’m allowed to skip the first period on my first day of school because this is by far the coolest school tour I’ve ever done,” you rambled on until you saw the grin on Natasha’s face. 

“You’re cute when you ramble,” she said matter-of-factly. “And no, you’re not allowed to skip the first period because you’re here.” 

You glanced at the door and saw that you were indeed standing in front of your classroom. You blushed and forced yourself to look back at this intriguing specimen of a human being in front of you. 

“Oh.”

Natasha took a step towards you and tucked a stray hair behind your ear. “See you later, Y/L/N,” she said before walking gracefully away. 

***

When you got inside the room, it was almost half full. No one paid you any attention because Natasha, bless her heart, walked you to the back door. When the bell rung, the only seat left was the one next to you. About twenty minutes after the class started, the front door swung open and a disheveled blonde walked inside.

“Ms. Danvers. Glad you’re able to join us today,” the teacher said. “And only twenty minutes late.”

The whole room laughed, the blonde woman chuckled too.

“Sorry Mr. Banner but it’s the meet season,” the blonde girl said.

Mr. Banner just sighed and waved her off before continuing the lecture. The blonde girl immediately spotted the only empty seat next to you. Your eyes met and for the second time that day you felt like your breath has been knocked out of you. For her part, Danvers seems to have frozen on her spot on the podium as well before she heard Mr. Banner clear his throat.

“Get it together, Danvers and sit already.”

Danvers took the steps of the stairs up to you in twos.

“Hi, I’m Carol. Carol Danvers,” she introduced herself before flopping down on her seat.

God, she’s even more attractive sitting there a foot away from you. Her hair’s golden, her eyes are warm and her smile is radiant.

“Hi, Y/N. Y/N Y/L/N,” you whispered.

She grinned. “Oh, you’re the genius from MIT? Nice to meet you. Maria can’t stop talking about you,” she tried to whisper but fail.

“You know Maria?” you asked even though you weren’t confused about how Maria would be friends with such a looker.

Before Carol can answer though, Mr. Banner shut his book loudly. When you turned back towards the front, Mr. Banner was looking straight at you and Carol.

“Care to include us in your discussion, girls?” he asked, not sounding very pleased.

You were on the way to shaking your head and shrinking in your seat before Carol spoke. “Did you know we have a MENSA student with us right now?” she asked. She sounds like she’s bragging a long-time friend’s achievement.

Mr. Banner didn’t look impressed. “I know Carol, that’s why I left that seat for you. So you can, maybe draw some inspiration and put an effort into this class.”

The whole room rambled with laughter. Carol still didn’t look affected by any of it.

“Well,” she started before blatantly checking you out. “I can already feel the inspiration coming.”

There was collective groaning inside the room like Carol does this thing all the time. Mr. Banner even facepalmed, literally. You couldn’t say or do anything but blush profusely on your seat. Mr. Banner called the class in order and continued the lecture with minimal interruptions from Carol because she was paying attention to you more than the blackboard.

When the bell rang, Carol was quickly being sought by various students, most of them are girls. A girl whisked her away, but Carol managed to stop by the door and wink at you. You groaned quietly before reaching out for your bag to look for your phone.

***

You: I swear school is out to get me.

Maria: Already? It’s your first day. Lunch? Meet me at the dining hall.

You: On my way.

Maria: Great! You’re great. Breathe. I love you.

You: Aye. See u.

Maria: Say it!

You rolled your eyes affectionately at your phone before relenting and typing out a response.

You: UGH! Fine! Love you too.

Maria: Now, was that so hard? :)

Growing up on the system though made it a tad hard for you to be vulnerable. Maria’s an exception though.

You shook your head before pocketing your phone and walking towards the direction of the dining hall. It was a part of the school tour with Natasha earlier that morning. So, finding the building wasn’t a problem. The problem was when you arrived, it was already packed full of hungry, noisy college students. The good thing is, looking for Maria on the crowd is second nature to you. You craned your neck up to scan the hall for Maria’s signature tight bun. 

It took a grand total of seven seconds before you spotted it on the table smack right in the middle of the hall. You walked casually towards the table but stop short when you realized Maria wasn’t sitting alone. She’s sitting in what you can only guess as the popular kids' table if the sheer number of attractive people sitting on it is to go by.

“You don’t plan on standing there for an hour, do you?” A voice too familiar spoke behind you. 

“Stark!” A pretty boy with military cut blonde hair wearing a basketball jersey shouted from the table before you could turn around and answer.

The whole table turned to your direction. Maria smiled at you. Tony didn’t wait for you to turn to him before he’s practically dragging you towards the table. 

“Who’s this?”

“Steve, don't be rude,” Natasha said firmly. Steve promptly closed his mouth. 

“Everyone, this is Y/N,” Maria introduced.

“Oh! The girl who vested Tony at the tech talent show on his own company?” Steve perked up and teased. 

Tony glared before throwing a napkin over Steve’s face. “Shut up,” he growled which prompted the table to erupt with laughter. 

“Hey, sit here,” Natasha and Carol said at the same time, which stopped the laughter almost immediately. 

Natasha and Carol glared at each other. Everyone was looking at the two’s stare off before a guy with sleek black comb back hair pulled you to sit beside him.

“Problem solved,” he said before smiling at you. You smiled at him thankfully. “I’m Loki. This is my big brother, Thor.”

Thor, amidst his muscular stature, gave you a toothy grin before extending his hand for you to shake. “Welcome to the gang. Don’t worry, we’re not always this messy,” he said. Something about Thor tells you he’s a safe space, so you let your first guard down and relaxed.

“Yeah, we’re always messier,” a girl who has her arms slung at the back on Carol’s chair said. “I’m Valkyrie, Val for short.”

You murmured a soft ‘nice to meet you’ but your eyes are focused on Val’s fingers playing with the ends of Carol’s blonde curls. You averted your eyes only for you to catch Natasha’s. She smiled before sliding across the table the other half of her sandwich. 

“You shouldn’t skip meals,” she explained softly.

“I wasn’t planning to but thank you,” you answered gratefully before taking a bite off the sandwich. It’s peanut butter, one of your favorites. 

Maria stayed low and watched the interaction between you, Natasha and Carol. She tossed the bottle of coconut water she got for you earlier before pulling out her phone. 

Maria: Now, I get it. Tread carefully, baby. 

You took a quick glance at your phone when you heard a notification. You looked at your best friend and rolled your eyes at her before turning back your attention at your conversation with Tony, Thor, and Loki. 

#avengers imagine #oceans 8 imagine #avengers x oceans 8 #avengers x reader #oceans 8 x reader #natasha romanoff x reader #carol danvers x reader #maria hill x reader #natasha romanoff #carol danvers #maria hill #tony stark #steve rogers #thor #loki #valkyrie #avengers #oceans 8 #raven writes

[dianapana]

SasuHina Month 2020- Day 3

Prompt I’d Choose You Again and Again

Mirror, Mirros -Part 3

The nightmares didn’t stop. She’d wake up in a cold sweat turn on the lights and look at the mirror, with dark rubies instead of red, that was broken, the only thing that differed was the image, once it would be of her lover from the dream; than of a little girl than a little boy and the cycle would start anew.  The strangest things about the whole thing was that instead of waking up scared, her heart would indeed pound, but she woke up feeling a sadness so deep she could barely breath. The events of the dreams differ from time to time the only thing they have in common is that they all start out nice and end up with her in the closet with her the ghost of her lover.

Apart from the dreams nothing else was weird, Hinata’s life went on as normal. Go to work, go see her family or friends if she has the time and return home. Soon enough the holiday would end and Uni would start again and she’d have to reduce her hours at the diner; so Hinata was working as many hours as she could at that moment, especially having taken a week off to go see Neji.

The good thing about the diner was that the owner, Teuchi, the cook Ayane were very nice people. The other waitresses were also nice but Hinata didn’t interact as much with them. She loved the diner mainly because of its vintage style with the checked floor, the red stools and red booths. The uniform was anything they wanted to wear as long as it was a white top and black bottoms. Their nametag was brooch like and could be pinned to any top.

Teuchi had called her around noon the day before asking if she could cover a double shift, because one of the girls called in sick all of a sudden, to which Hinata agreed. She decided to wear a white T-shirt tucked in a skater skirt and a pair of black flats. She did own clothing items that were not vintage but she preferred to throw in something quite old into the mix; that day she chose to wear a red headband; the story behind that particular item was that it was an actual headband wore by a pinup model in the 50s. She took her jean jacket with her because despite being summer still, the nights were starting to get colder, autumn was making its presence known.

The day went on without any trouble, being summer, the diner was quite busy but that wasn’t all that bad; it kept Hinata occupied from thinking about the nightmares she’d been having. Around the middle of her second shift Hinata started feeling tired and her feet were killing her from walking back and forth the whole day. Thankfully dinner hour had just about ended and there were only a few more people around, most of them teens or young adults that only stopped by to eat something before going to a party. The other waitress had left about 40 minutes before.

All tables were set for the moment so Hinata could take a break herself and eat something. Ayane made her favorite veggie burger with sweet potato fries. The music was soft and mellow so people could talk, the lights weren’t blinding and everything about the diner just made Hinata feel at home. She had loved it from the moment she stepped inside it a few years ago looking for a job that she could handle while she was still in high school at the time. Hinata was just taking her plate back to the kitchen when the doorbell rang signaling new customers.

“I swear you’re going to love this place” Said a cheerful voice. Hinata recognized the voice and smiled to herself. Naruto was one of their most common customers. He’d pass by at least once a day and almost always ordered the very same thing. The diner served traditional Japanese fast food but also “normal” diner menu. Hinata took out her notepad to write down Naruto’s order despite knowing by heart exactly what he wanted.

Naruto noticed her walking their way and smiled at her and she smiled right back, he had that effect on people, his positivity was just contagious.

“Hey Naruto. We were getting worried since you haven’t been by in a few days” Hinata said, it was mostly a joke but she did notice his absence in the past 2-3 days.

“Yea sorry about that. I had to help Teme move in so there was no time to swing by” The blonde answered and nodded towards his friend. Hinata’s eyes moved to the guy standing on the other side of the booth.

The moment their eyes met she got goosebumps. She didn’t have time to analyze what was happening because Naruto started talking again.

“We’ll have two of my normal order” He said to her. “It’s the best thing here you have to try that first” he said to his friend.

As in a daze Hinata walked back to the kitchen and told Ayane the order. “Nobody new came I’m taking a 5-minute break ok?” Hinata said and hurried to the back door.

Her hands were trembling and her heart was beating much faster than it would normal. Naruto’s friend, he was the man from her dreams. The one holding her close and whispering her name. He was the man to hold out his hand and watch her kill herself in the dream. She had read somewhere that every face you see in your dreams is a person you’ve seen somewhere, on the street, on tv, in pictures. Your brain can not come up on its own with new faces. She must have seen him somewhere before today.

‘But Naruto had said he just moved here’

‘No, he said he moved. Maybe he moved from an apartment to the other, from living with his family or a roommate to living on his own. People move around in the same town all the time’

‘Right. I’m sure that’s what he meant. That means I saw him before. No biggie’

‘Yes, yes that makes sense’

There was no other explanation. Finishing up the dialogue with herself, having calmed down a little and approving of the reasoning she reached, Hinata went back inside.

The boys’ food wasn’t done yet but one of the tables wished to get the check and leave. After putting the money in the cashier Hinata went back to the kitchen and took the two-ramen bowls to the table. She was trying her best not to look at Naruto’s friend. Despite knowing that the dream was just a coincidence she still felt weird looking at him. Her brain picked his face to illustrate her lover and that was awkward.

“The diner is pretty dead at the time. Why don’t you sit down Hina?” Naruto said and slid to the side to make room for her. Naruto was right the diner was quite empty; besides them there were only 2 other tables occupied and they were both still eating. Hinata wanted to refuse but wasn’t sure how so she took the easier route and said ‘sure’.

“Hinata this is my friend Sasuke. He just transferred here from Kiri.” Naruto introduced the two and Hinata’s panic came back full mode. She had been mistaken. He moved from another town, she hadn’t seen him before, and to top it all his name was Sasuke.

“Nice to meet you. If you don’t mind me asking what’s your family name?” Her voice was oddly calm compared to the storm that was happening in her brain.

‘It’s just a name coincidence I’m sure’

‘He’s not the Sasuke from the mirror. That’s impossible’

“Uchiha” He said and looked at her in a funny way. In 5 seconds Sasuke did so much damage. He had the same name as the one written on the back of the mirror, her nightmares started after buying said mirror, this guy that shared the name from the mirror was a recurring character in her dream, and his voice matched as well, it sounded just as it did when he talked her; when he said she was beautiful in her dreams.

“Nice to meet you” Hinata said her voice was a bit breathless but neither of the guys seemed to notice. What the man said to her when she bought the mirror came back to her ‘The Uchiha curse shall not die miss, make sure you don’t either’ was it really a curse? Too many things were happening for it to be pure coincidence. She was scared.

The following 15 seconds were spent it silence, the boys were eating and Hinata was looking at her own hands. They were clasped tightly on her lap so they’d stop shaking. Thankfully one of the men from the other table signed her to go to their table. Hinata left the booth like it was on fire. Scenes from her nightmare were playing in front of her eyes. The diner was in flames and Sasuke was calling for her, asking for help.

“We’d like the check please” the man that signed for her said.

“Of course” she was working the register when Ayane came out from the kitchen.

“I’m going to turn the sign around so no more people come. Teuchi-san said we can close up earlier today since it’s this slow” Ayane said and she walked back to the register looking at the two tables that were both almost done. “You can go get your things and go home I’ll close up after everyone leaves.”

“Thank you, Ayane-san” Hinata went to the back where her jacket and bag were. She washed her hands in the bathroom before putting on her jacket and going back inside. Ayane was just ringing up the last table. Naruto and his friend had left thankfully. She wasn’t sure what she should do about the mirror, the nightmares, Sasuke. Hinata was still in deep thought when she stepped out of the diner.

“Oh, is your shift over Hina?” Naruto asked scaring her. The boys were just outside in the parking lot next to a beautiful black Impala. Sasuke was smoking not really looking at her. At least that’s what she thought, from the corner of his eye Sasuke had been following her around from the moment his eyes laid on her.

“Yes, I was just going home.” She answered it was a bit rude not to ask what they were up to but she wanted the conversation to end as soon as possible. Normally she’d stay and chit-chat with Naruto for a while, but for obvious reasons that option did not feel safe.

“Sasuke’s almost done with that cig and we can give you a drive home. It’s late and quite cold” The blonde offered.

“Oh, that’s not necessary…”

“We’re going to your neighborhood anyway, Kiba invited us over to his house to play some video games and chill.” Naruto smiled at her. “So, it’s no problem at all. I’d feel much worse if we left you here.”

Her mind was working twice as fast trying to come up with a reason why she should walk home alone. But the blonde didn’t wait for her reply and pretty much dragged her to the car and opened the door for her to get in. Which she did. She never minded Naruto’s pushiness before, but in that moment she felt irritated by it.

Sasuke slid in the driver’s seat and Naruto in the shotgun seat. The drive wouldn’t be more than 10-15 minutes but the silence was deafening.

“I heard you went to USA to see Neji a week ago, how was that?” Naruto was good like that, he always tried to keep the conversation going.

“Yea I did, it was great I missed him a lot.” Naruto talked for most of the drive.

“I don’t really know where you live Hina, I just know the neighborhood so you gotta give Teme some directions from here on”

“Actually, it’s fine if you drop me off here or at Kiba’s I can walk from there” She wasn’t very keen on Sasuke knowing where she lived.

“Oooooor you can come hang out with us if you want, at Kiba’s I mean. He’ll be so pumped to see you.” The Uzumaki stated.

She knew Kiba would like to see her, they’ve talked a few days ago about meeting up but nothing really worked for both of them. She did miss Kiba…

‘Are you nuts? You can’t go. Sasuke will be there…’

‘It’s either that or I tell him my address what if he kills me in my sleep?’

‘O, shoot we went from creepy coincidence to murderer this fast?’

‘I don’t know! But I doubt he’ll try anything with Naruto and Kiba around…right?’

“Yea ok, I’ll join you guys for a while…”

“Great! Don’t text Kiba though I wanna see his face when he sees you.” Naruto said laughing “It’s adorable Sasuke I swear, he turns into a puppy dog whenever Hina is around”

They reached Kiba’s house and all three walked towards the door, Naruto stopped abruptly which made Sasuke stop and Hinata walked into him. Three things happened then at the same time.

1.      Hinata saw the Uchiha symbol on the back of Sasuke’s shirt.

2.      Hinata touched his arm and took a step back to balance herself, so she wouldn’t fall over

3.      Memories of her past life came back to her. All the nightmares made sense, she knew what the mirror meant, who Sasuke was. And the fear she felt just moments before; that fear turned to comfort.

Hinata took another step back, and another. She was overwhelmed by emotions. Utter sadness for the pain she experienced before, joy because she found the love of her life once again, she would find him in every lifetime time and time again. She also felt love, A feeling that Hinata had not experienced in that current life was now flowing inside her and it wanted to break free. Her eyes were watering up and all she wanted to do was hug Sasuke and make sure he is indeed real, but she couldn’t.

Part 1 (Day 1.2)

Part 2 (Day 2)

Part 4 (Day 8)

#shmonth2020 #SH2020 #sasuhina month #sasuhina month 2020 #sasuke #hinata #sasuke uchiha #hinata hyuuga #dia-story #diawrites #fanfic #sasuhina fanfic #naruto #writers on tumblr #mirror mirror

[ladyherenya]

Books read in December

I set myself some reading goals for the end of the year -- finish any books I’d already started, read the books I'd already borrowed, and to read ebooks I’d bought before buying any more. But I guess most of those books just weren’t the right genre? A few exceptions aside, this month I read a bunch of other things instead.

Also read: The Frost Fair Affair and Holiday Brew by Tansy Rayner Roberts, and Sweetest in the Gale and 40-Love by Olivia Dade.

Reread: Love Lettering by Kate Clayborn and Bookish and the Beast by Ashley Poston.

Total: thirteen novels (including two audiobooks and two rereads), three novellas, and three story/novella collections.

Favourite cover: The cover was what caught my attention for Finding My Voice and Old Baggage.

Still reading: Between Silk and Cyanide by Leo Marks, Or What You Will by Jo Walton and The Disorderly Knights by Dorothy Dunnett.

Next up: A Most Improper Magick by Stephanie Burgis.

*

Queen’s Play by Dorothy Dunnett (narrated by David Monteath): In 1548, Francis Crawford of Lymond arrives in France, incognito in order to protect Scotland’s queen, seven-year-old Mary. I enjoyed this, even though I am not very interested in the antics of the French court and thought The Game of Kings benefitted from having more characters who I found wholly likeable and/or who matter, personally, to Lymond. Dunnett is an impressive storyteller -- vivid descriptions, lively dialogue, nuanced characters and twists that take me by surprise. Moreover, those satisfying puzzle pieces explain the plots and intrigue, give insight into personalities and develop the narrative’s themes (here, the consequences of power). 

The Kinship of Secrets by Eugenia Kim: In 1950, four year old Inja lives with her grandparents and uncle in Seoul, while her sister Miran is in America with their parents. War delays the family’s reunion. This is a fascinating portrayal of two sisters growing up in different countries, and an incredibly poignant story about a family separated. Compelling, and beautifully written, and despite moments of intense grief, hopeful. I liked how, in the end, Inja and Miran didn’t have all the answers.. But I wonder if I’d have found the ending more satisfying if I had a deeper understanding of who they both were as adults.

Teacup Magic series by Tansy Rayner Roberts:

Tea and Sympathetic Magic: Stephanie Burgis recommended this novella as something similar to her Harwood Spellbook series and it certainly has a similar appeal: romantic fantasy, bordering on comedy-of-manners territory. Like Georgette Heyer but with magic and diversity and an intention to challenge problematic and outdated attitudes. Charming and cosy, like a good cup of tea rather than a frothy hot chocolate. Miss Mnemosyne Seaborne, a reluctant guest at a houseparty. She joins forces with the other guests after an unexpected abduction occurs. Entertaining, and even though it was too short for me to really become invested, I immediately wanted to read the sequel.

The Frost Fair Affair: After her previous adventures, Mneme has new friends, a suitor and a campaign: overturning the social conventions which prevent women from travelling by portal. After someone in Town steals her political pamphlets, she gets caught up in a mystery. I enjoyed this oh so much! I found myself caring a lot more about Mneme and her relationships; I liked the mixture of intrigue and danger, and how in the cause of dealing with these, Mneme learns more about the man she hopes to marry; and the Frost Fair, on a frozen river, makes a delightful setting. I'd love to read more.

Belladonna U(niversity) series by Tansy Rayner Roberts:

Unreal Alchemy: Oh, this is my new favourite! Urban fantasy about Australian uni students who are connected to an indie rock band, Fake Geek Girl. These stories are funny, geeky and romantic, with great chapter titles and lots of fandom references. They employ different points of view and different narrative styles in a way that’s really effective. I love the characters and how important and intense their non-romantic relationships are. Between them they have a variety of romantic/sexual relationships and feelings, but friendships and familial relationships, like the one between twin sisters Hebe and Holly, also drive the narrative. The first collection contains four stories/novellas.

Fake Geek Girl -- Ferd moves into the Manic Pixie Dream House; Holly and Sage argue about the future of the band.

Unmagical Boy Story -- Viola has feelings about her best friend losing his magic, transferring colleges and making new friends.

The Bromancers --  The band and frriends spend a weekend at a magical music festival.

The Alchemy of Fine -- A prequel about the band’s origins.

Holiday Brew: This collection is more serious and less overtly fandom-y than the first, but arguably still very meta (especially if you consider Viola, Jules and Ferd as a response to the trio in Harry Potter). I sat down intending to read just one of these stories -- and ended up reading them all.

Halloween Is Not A Verb -- Holly invites various people to their mums’ place for Halloween.

Solstice on the Rocks -- A short story about university graduation.

Kissing Basilisks --  Begins on New Year’s Day, is compelling, and picks up the non-band-related narrative threads from Fake Geek Girl.

Missing Christmas by Kate Clayborn: This novella is loosely connected to Beginer's Luck but stands alone. It's sweet. Business partners and best friends Jasper and Kristen pay a last minute trip to a client and get trapped by a blizzard, which pushes them to reconsider the boundaries they’ve drawn in their relationship. I liked the moments which showed that they’re an effective team because they know each other so well and can communicate through subtle body language. 

Finding My Voice by Marie Myung-Ok Lee: Ellen is a Korean-American teenager in her final year of high school. Her story is about applying for college, gymnastics training, Ellen’s relationships with her best friend and her first boyfriend, dealing with racism at school and with her parents’ expectations that she will follow her sister to Harvard. It’s very short, first published in 1993. I was aware of all the places where a YA novel written today would be allowed to give more details and to expand the story, but it was still interesting.

The Magnolia Sword: A Ballad of Mulan by Sherry Thomas: I’ve borrowed this several times this year, only to return it unread each time, and I was starting to wonder if I really wanted to read it. But once I actually sat down and focused, I quickly realised that I definitely did! I became completely engrossed in this Mulan retelling. It’s a tense adventure. I enjoyed the characters and their interactions, particularly the elaborate courtesy of formal conversations, and the way Mulan and her companions value loyalty and camaraderie. I thought this was a very believable take on the whole girl-disguised-as-a-boy thing too.

Dear Mrs Bird by AJ Pearce: In 1940, Emmy wants a newspaper job but is instead typing up letters for a women’s magazine and discarding mail from readers whose problems are Unacceptable. Frustrated that Mrs Bird won’t offer advice to so many women in need, Emmy's tempted to take matters into her own hands. Her optimism means she makes some naive mistakes, some of which made me wince, but it’s also an incredible strength. She's delightful company. I really like how much of this story is about her friendship with Bunty and I enjoyed the insight into women's magazines and the Auxiliary Fire Service.

The Lonely Hearts Dog Walkers by Sheila Norton: Recently separated, Nicola moves back in with her mother, starts as a teaching assistant at her daughter’s new school, gets a puppy and joins a group of dog walkers, who embark upon a mission to save the local park. This was very low-angst and, once I realised the sort of story it was, kind of predictable. I can recognise the appeal of this brand of realism, but personally would have preferred more humour or more emotional complexity. Were Nicola a colleague, it’d be easy to find things in common to discuss, but her story wasn’t quite what I was looking for.

Chasing Lucky by Jenn Bennett: When Josie and her mother return to Beauty to look after the family bookshop, Josie has plans -- keep to herself, finish high school, secure a photography apprenticeship, move to LA. But after Josie accidentally breaks a store-front window and her childhood friend Lucky takes the blame, Josie���s priorities change. I enjoyed this more than I expected to. I particularly liked how Lucky subverts people’s expectations, and how Josie’s family works at communicating better with each other.

Old Baggage by Lissa Evans (narrated by Joanna Scanlan): It’s 1928 and Mattie Simpkin, a now-middle-aged militant suffragette, lives in Hampstead with her friend Florrie Lee (aka The Flea). Mattie gives lectures about the suffragettes but realises she’s not reaching the younger generation. So she starts a club for “healthy outdoor fun” for teenage girls. Mattie is wonderfully forthright -- amusing, engaging and informative when it comes to things she’s passionate about -- but she’s also fallible.  A really delightful yet bittersweet story about friendship and loss and the opportunities available for women. I liked its awareness that being able to loudly be yourself is a privilege not everyone has. 

There’s Something About Marysburg series by Olivia Dade:

Teach Me: Rose is unimpressed -- not only must she share her classroom with the new history teacher, he’s been given her Honors World History class. There’s something particularly satisfying about people who have been hurt and lonely finding support and love in each other. I like that they get to know each other over many months. I like Martin’s relationship with his teenage daughter and Rose’s relationship with her ex’s parents is so touching that one scene made me cry. And it was interesting seeing the US school system from the perspective of experienced teachers; I appreciated the details about their jobs.

Sweetest in the Gale: a Marysburg story collection contains three novellas about couples in their forties.

Sweetest in the Gale -- Griff is worried when Candy, a fellow English teacher, returns for the new school year uncharacteristically sombre and subdued. A really sweet romance about people who are navigating loss and grief.

Unraveled -- Maths teacher Simon is assigned to observe and mentor the new art teacher, Poppy. I enjoyed the threads of mystery.

Cover Me -- After a concerning mammogram result, Elizabeth marries an old friend so she’s covered by his health insurance. Predictable as anything, but that made it a safe position from which to explore serious and sobering topics.

40-Love: I’m not interested in tennis or holiday resorts; I was disappointed that this novel wouldn’t show Tess being an assistant principal; and even though some of my favourite fictional couples have a significant age-gap, I’m wary about age-gap romances (and socially-programmed to think it’s odd for a woman to date a much younger guy). But I liked the other stories in this series and I was curious. It’s Not really My Cup of Tea, but I was convinced that Tess and Lucas were both capable of making their (somewhat unconventional) relationship work. An interesting exercise in challenging my social-programming.

The Viscount Who Loved Me by Julia Quinn: After watching Bridgerton (not always to my tastes but mostly fun), curiosity prompted me to read the opening of the second novel, and I was so entertained by Kate Sheffield verbally sparring with the viscount, whom Kate is determined to prevent from marrying her younger sister. I continued to be entertained up until the viscount acts a bit too entitled on his wedding night (that’s unattractive, if outrightly problematic). Which left me in rather an uncharitable mood for the final act, so I can’t identify if the drama of dealing with past traumas didn’t meet the standard of the earlier comedy or if I just hold such scenes to differing standards.

#Herenya reviews books #sooner or later

[ssa25]

Not for You - Sasuhina

Rated: T (for curse words and other implicit details) 

 Hinata pulled the lapels of her borrowed faux leather jacket closer together to keep out the evening breeze. And, under that pretense, cover up her decolletage that seemed to strain against the black tube top Ino had also lent (read:forced) her to wear. The girl had some crazy convincing skills.

“C’mon Hinata… We can’t have Naruto waiting too long… Lord knows he can’t keep it together for too long without letting his inner fuckboy out…”

The telltale blush on Hyuuga Hinata was creeping up slowly. But she tried to calm her nerves. She could do this, she definitely could. Flirt with Naruto. 

It had only been a week since she was introduced to him at the apartment she moved into. Yamanaka Ino and Haruno Sakura were next door neighbours, and good friends with Tenten, her flatmate. 

The girls had been welcoming, much to her relief. It was hard to transfer universities in the middle of sophomore year, but desperate times called for desperate measures. After her father’s car accident and Hanabi being a teenager, her Uncle Hizashi had them move to Konoha to live with his family. Hyuuga Hiashi who was wheelchair bound for the next few months, now was under the care of his twin brother and his family. Hanabi could focus on school and Hinata didn't have to consider dropping out of university to care for him. Their Uncle's home wasn't lavish by any stretch and Hinata didn’t want to impede anymore than she had to, so she opted to rent out near university. 

It was there that she first met Uzumaki Naruto. Tall, blonde, fit and tanned, she was practically moony eyed for the first few seconds when Tenten introduced him to her. He had been kind enough to help Ino and Sakura assemble their new dining table, after their old rickety one collapsed, unable to bear Ino and her weird but sweet boyfriend Sai’s weight, as per Sakura’s accusations. All in all, moving to Konoha had been a weirdly pleasant experience, and meeting Naruto was just turning out to be the highlight of it all. 

Tenten was quick on the uptake and got Hinata to attend the Friday night party at a Nara Shikamaru’s mansion. She had never met him, but that wasn’t going to be a big deal. Everyone was invited. 

“Uh-oh, Sakura just messaged, she is too busy looking for Sasuke to keep a tab on Naruto.”, Tenten looked up from her phone at her blond and the blue haired companion. “The house is right around the corner. Let’s get going.”

They could even hear the low hum of music that was probably blasting over at their destination. Hinata took a deep breath to calm her nerves. She looked to the side and found dark tinted window of an black SUV, reflecting her flushed nervous appearance. Turning fully to it, she pushed her fingers through her hair touch up the sexy messy hair Ino had helped her with. Smacking her lips together to keep her lip gloss even, her eyes drifted downwards to birth of her cleavage and her face contorted into a nervous frown. Parting the sides of the jacket, she saw how the top was literally like second skin on her body. Never did she think that her body could look sexy and alluring. She traced the hem of the neckline wondering if others would deem it as slutty. 

She had always dressed modestly, her dresses always below knee length, her jeans always baggy and her tops always three sizes bigger. Her father had severely restricted her since she was very young and forbid them to wear anything remotely suggestive. Now that she was on her own, she had the chance to change her style, but this outfit was clearly an exaggeration.

She pulled up the neckline to cover what she could and pulled the jacket close. And tried to look more determined than shy. 

"I can do this… I can talk to Naruto…. Yeah..", she muttered words of courage to herself. 

“Hinata..??", Ino called her. Tenten and her were already a few yards away.

“Yeah, I-I’ll be there…”

Just as she cast a final glance at her reflection, she heard the whirring sound of the tinted window lowering. She gasped and took a step back, horrified to see a dark haired stranger looking back at her from the inside of the SUV. 

It was so embarrassing, she wanted to smack her head somewhere. Unsure of what she should do in such an awkward situation, she muttered a ‘sorry’ and started walking away, mentally cursing her rotten luck. Ino and Tenten were nowhere in sight, they had probably just turned around the corner. 

She decided it would be better to join them. But on hearing a short whistle from behind her, she halted and turned slowly to see the guy in the car, open his door and get out. He had a slight smirk on his face as he looked at her and shut the door. 

"You might want to take off your jacket. Naruto would come talk to you himself." 

If she thought she couldn't get any redder than she usually did, she was proven wrong.

--

“Sasuke’s back!!! ”, Sakura’s voice boomed over the loud music. 

Hinata choked on the cheap wine she had been sipping on, while talking to Naruto, when she saw the man Sakura had pulled towards them. It was the same creep of a guy she had seen minutes back. 

Trying to cough it out, Naruto helped pat her back.

“Hey, hey, you alright?”

She nodded her head and thought about ducking away under some excuse. 

“Hinata, I want you to meet Uchiha Sasuke… Sasuke, this is Hinata, she just moved in with Tenten.”

“Hi. ”, Sasuke greeted her nonchalantly, but his eyes hovered over her. She shifted on her legs, clearly uncomfortable. Now that she remembered, she had heard his name in quite a few conversations between the girls. 

She felt mortified to even think that this Sasuke guy might tell on her to Naruto. And then Naruto might think she was a weirdo. Amd avoid her. Oh, how she hated her luck.

Lost in her thoughts, she realised a little late at the few pairs of eyes staring at her, waiting for her response. She realised her mistake and quickly muttered a garbled ‘Hello’ back at him. 

“Bastard, where did you disappear to? Sakura was going crazy looking for you…”, Naruto complained to him. 

“I needed some fresh air.”, he replied leaning on the wall beside him. 

“I told her you would lurking somewhere nearby, but she wouldn't listen…Anyway, I was just telling Hinata here about our upcoming basketball game against Suna .. Right before she choked on her drink…”

“Clothes too tight maybe…”, Sasuke muttered. 

“What?”, Naruto and Sakura asked together. 

“T-T-Tell me more about the game Naruto… ”, Hinata distracted Naruto from the evil acquaintance who was tattling on her. She had zipped up her jacket to make sure no one got an eyeful of what he had already seen. If that was the reaction, it was going to garner, she wasn’t too sure she could handle the attention. 

"Sure.", her blonde haired crush grinned at her. "So, Sasuke and I are like….the star players of our team… Though, Shikamaru is the captain…. He is a lazy ass, but is the best strategist… And Suna Uni has an amazing team too… My friend Gaara plays in that team… Super guy, I'll introduce you to him at the afterparty. "

Hinata was only half listening to what he had to say, because it was starting to feel like a hot furnace inside the jacket. It was too crowded, the music was too loud, it was all just too much for her senses. She lifted her long locks over her shoulders just to ventilate herself. 

"F*ck, why is it so hot in here..", Ino commented as she joined the group with her boyfriend Sai. She was fanning herself with a magazine. And had already taken off her denim jacket. 

Just then, a brown haired guy with triangle shaped tattoos on his cheeks snickered and butted in between Sasuke and Naruto. "Yo yo yo…. Guess what I did… It's genius…" 

Tenten looked at him suspiciously and replied. "What Kiba?" 

"Turned up the heaters to the max in all the rooms…. In no time, chicks will be shedding their clothes.. It's gonna be epic.. ", Kiba laughed and patted the guys' backs and walked away in the direction of the dancing crowd. 

The girls gasped at his revelation and Hinata could only frown worriedly. She was definitely not taking off her jacket, but the only other option was to either get out of there or pass out from the intense heat. 

Before she could inform any of the girls about her problem, Ino and Sai volunteered to find Shikamaru and get him to fix this mess, while Tenten left to refill her cup. The only other person left was Sakura, but she had pressed herself to Sasuke's side with no intention of letting go. 

"Narutooooooooo" 

A shrill voice screeched over the music. . 

"F*cking hell…. Shion is here..", Naruto said as he nervously glanced around. "Who the f*ck invited her?" 

"No one you idiot. It's an open invitation.", Sasuke replied with a straight face. 

"Sh*t!", he scratched the back of his head and took a few steps back. "Well, it was nice chatting to you guys… See ya later."

With that, he rushed away from them to a different part of the mansion. 

Hinata looked at his back in confusion. "What happened to him?", she asked Sakura. 

The pretty pink haired woman wearing a tight red tube top and dark skinny jeans laughed in response. "He is avoiding Shion… He slept with her few months back… And now he can't get her off his back. Trust me, don't ever tell her that you like Naruto… That woman is crazy possessive about him…" 

Hinata looked wide-eyed at Sakura, who didn't seem perturbed about spilling out about her crush on Naruto. She glanced at Sasuke who gave her a knowing smirk while drinking from his cup. It made her break out in a fresh round of sweat. As if, her jacket already wasn't feeling sticky on her skin. 

"I… I need some fresh air.", she announced and walked away from the duo. 

It took her a bit to navigate through the half drunk crowd of young adults, before she located the door to the back garden. 

From the little, she had seen the mansion seemed even bigger on the inside than it looked from the outside. She had not met Shikamaru yet, but it seemed like his parents were loaded.

The back gardens seemed even more ostentatious than the front. There was a small gazebo on one side of it, which seemed unoccupied. She quickly occupied one of the wooden benches inside the gazebo, with her back leaning on the inside wall. 

After a quick glance around, she unzipped the jacket and breathed out a sigh of relief. She should have stuck to wearing her own clothes, she surmised. This whole daring outfit was a bad bad idea. She slung the jacket down from her shoulders to her elbows to air out her back. 

“You should take off that jacket.”, her heart lurched as she heard someone speak into her ears. 

She spun around in her seat to find Sasuke, his eyes filled with mirth.

"What are you doing here?", she asked him suspiciously.

But he just walked around and got into the gazebo, sitting on a bench opposite to her. This time he had a bottle of beer in his hand. 

She slipped the jacket back up her shoulders and looked away from him. Was he following her? She didn’t even have the courage to ask him blatantly. 

She decided to ignore him, hoping he would go back to wherever he came from and she could continue cooling herself. If not, she would have to look for another place for some solitary cooling off. 

"So, Naruto, huh?", he spoke again. 

"E-excuse me??" 

"Quite curious I think, he hardly had anyone pinning after him when he was younger. Noe he's got a handful. Is it the hair? Or the tan?", he mulled over loud enough for her to hear. 

Hinata crossed her arms across her abdomen and looked down on the weather-worn wooden planks to hide her blush. "I don't believe that's any of your busi-" 

"Aa, both then." 

Hinata huffed in frustration and glared at the man, but he seemed unruffled. She really wanted to speak up for herself. 

“Y-you know, it isn’t polite to look at a woman in her vulnerable state without her knowledge.”

“Hardly my fault. You did all of that yourself.”, Sasuke replied as folded one leg over the other. 

“But you could have let me know of your presence behind the tinted windows.”

“Why would I do that? In fact, as I had mentioned before, you are quite appropriately dressed for Naruto…. He is looking for a good lay tonight… Like most guys here… ”

She looked aghast at what he was insinuating. He was clearly an obnoxious person.

“Most guys like…. you?...”

“Hn… Depends… Are you suggesting something?”

She narrowed her eyes at him and grimaced. “You… You are really obnoxious."

The man chuckled at her. 

“Aren’t you overreacting?”, he asked as she folded her arms and looked away from him.

Hinata was a very patient person on a good day. But today, she was not in the mood to put up with any judgement from a guy who, up until a few hours back, had not even been aware of her existence. Or maybe it was just the wine talking. 

“Maybe I am, I’m not so sure myself. But I’m positively certain that I don’t want to talk to you anymore.”

That was when they heard some giggles behind the some thick bushes few yards away. 

Sasuke didn't say anything after she made her reluctance to chat, verbally clear to him. An awkward silence followed for the next minute or so, and Hinata considered going back home. Naruto was hiding, and she was uncomfortable with her clothes.

When she stood up, the quiet of the evening was disrupted by lewd feminine moans. 

"Umm...Ah...Yes...Yes…. F*ck…. yes…..yes…. Sai…. F*ck… you're so big…" 

Hinata was horrified beyond words, while her face looked like a ripe tomato. When she heard Sasuke snicker at her, she floundered internally to snap back at him. 

"Yes, Ino… Now we know that Sai is big.", Sasuke announced loud enough for the whole garden to have heard. 

They heard Ino shriek before hearing a loud thump. Seconds later, they had Ino straightening her skirt as she stood in front of them, glaring at the Uchiha, with Sai right behind her. When she saw Hinata with him, she was surprised, to say the least. 

"Oh… Hinata… What are you doing here? With Sasuke?" 

With Sasuke? Hinata was shocked at the mild implication in her words. "N-Nothing… I… I-It was too hot inside, so I came here to cool off." 

"Ino said the same thing.", Sai said with a passive expression. "So she wanted to f*ck outside." 

Ino elbowed him lightly to shut him up. "My apologies. Sai doesn't have a filter. I tried to get Shikamaru to turn off the heaters, but he doesn't seem to want to come out of his room. Apparently, he had a fight with Temari earlier. So he is sulking by himself."

"Tch."

Ino put her hands on her hips as she looked at Sasuke, before turning to Hinata again. "Stay away from him Hinata." 

Sasuke narrowed his eyes at the blonde woman. "What the f*ck is that about?" 

"Nothing.", she replied with a shrug. "Just that Sakura has serious dibs on you. Hinata was probably not aware of it." 

Sasuke sneered, "Ah, dibs. Sure. Because you are still pre-schoolers who don't understand when someone says that they are not interested."

"Well, you are never interested in anyone." 

"Not true.", he snapped back at her. 

Ino seemed a little surprised. So she leaned forward with a mocking smile. "Oh, really…. Tell me one person who has your interest." 

Hinata moved her eyes back and forth between the two, preferring to be the passive witness of the exchange, like Sai. But when she saw Sasuke stare at her purposefully with an upward tilt of one corner of his lips, she got a strange sense of foreboding.

#SasuHina #might be a oneshot #Depending on how I feel I might also decide to write more

[thesurielships]

We are golden stars upon silver seas

Word count: 2.1k

Summary: Feyre hates Rhys. She ruins his chances with the new girl.

Masterlist

Feyre Archeron wasn’t drunk. She was in her favorite bar, in her favorite seat, served by her favorite barista, in her best drinking gear, and she was not drunk. Nor drinking. 

Why, then, wasn’t she drunk?

Raucous laughter reverberated through the bar. Feyre glared at the bane of her existence, whose sheer presence made everything - including the wine in her mouth - turn sour.

Rhysand was guffawing with his Inner Circle. He seemed to be telling a story so funny that they dissolved into laughter every two sentences. Of course, he would be the life of the party. Of course, he would choose this bar to have his party at. Of fucking course.

‘You’re staring,’ Alis chided.

‘He’s an eyesore,’ Feyre sighed.

‘Sure he is,’ her friend chuckled. ‘Oh, there is Viviane.’

Feyre looked up, and sure enough, the new girl had just entered the bar. She had porcelain skin and white blond hair, her eyes a striking icy blue. In short, she was beautiful. And, Feyre noted regretfully as she watched her eyes zero in on Rhysand, interested in that asshole.

Feyre let out an all suffering sigh. ‘Here is to another girl who’s about to get her heart broken,’ she toasted Alis, then took a ravenous sip of her drink.

Alis merely shook her head, an indulgent smile on her face. She was used to Feyre ranting about everything related to Rhysand, be it fact or speculation or merely something she conjured from her imagination.

‘This happens every time,’ Feyre went on. ‘New girl falls for Rhysand. He takes her on a couple dates, has his fun, then dumps her ass. How many more times do I have to watch this scenario unfold? How many more times am I going to sit on my ass while a girl gets her heart broken by the devil?’

Something suddenly occurred to her. To get to Rhysand, Viviane would have to get past her table.

‘But maybe I can do something this time.’

‘Oh, no.’

‘Maybe I can be this nice, sweet girl’s salvation.’

‘Feyre, stop.’

‘Viviane,’ Feyre called, standing on her seat, waving her arms enthusiastically. 

Alis covered her face with her hands. ‘You’re embarrassing.’

Feyre paid her no heed. ‘Viviane!’

Viviane looked at her, confused. To be fair, it was their first time talking.

Oh whatever, Feyre thought, heroes never bother introducing themselves.

‘Hi, honey. You’re the transfer girl, right? I’m Feyre. I’m an art major, too. We’ll probably have many classes together. And this is Alis.’

‘Hello,’ Viviane said, nodding shyly to both of them.

‘What do you think of our town so far? I can show you around, if you’d like.’

‘Thank you so much, but I wouldn’t want to be a bother.’

‘Bother? Oh, not at all. Did you know that when I first came here, my family had just gone broke, my sister had run away to someplace, and my other sister had gone sick with shock?’ Feyre was a very chatty drunk-even when she was only slightly buzzed. ‘It was awful. Thank God I met Alis to show me around the town, or else I would’ve wallowed in misery in my dorm room forever.’

Viviane’s eyes had drifted away about halfway through Feyre’s monologue.

‘Viviane?’

She let out a dreamy sigh.

‘Viviane!’

‘Oh yes. Feyre, was it? I’m sorry, it’s just… he’s so hot.’

‘Who?’ Feyre turned around, then back. ‘Oh, you mean Rhysand?’

Viviane nodded, still staring at him with moony eyes.

‘Yeah. It’s amazing how all the hot ones turn out to be gay, right? You should see his boyfriend. He has these gorgeous lashes and - ’

Viviane’s eyes snapped to her. Well, that got her attention. ‘Wait. What did you say?’

Feyre barely managed to hold back her smirk. ‘His boyfriend has - ’

‘You mean he’s gay?’

‘Oh. You didn’t know. Sorry. But I guess better hear it from me than from him, right?’

Viviane had gone very red. Feyre was getting worried. ‘Viviane?’

Suddenly she grabbed Feyre’s glass and chugged it down. Then she grabbed Alis’s glass and chugged it down. Then she started crying.

Feyre looked at Alis.

Alis looked at Feyre. Told you so, her look seemed to say.

What do we do now, said Feyre’s.

Alis shrugged.

They both let out a sigh, then grabbed a shoulder each and welcomed Viviane into their little group.

***

Viviane, it turned out, was an even chattier drunk than Feyre. She was also much more morose. Once the dam had broken, she told them all about being unhappy in her former uni and major, and having trouble to transfer as she was a few years older than them. She had struggled to take the leap and switch to art as, though it had always been her dream, 25 seemed like a bit too old for a beginner artist. This, Alis and Feyre were quick to reassure her, was not at all true. Many people started college at 25 or more, and they knew a middle aged couple in their class who were having the time of their lives exploring their artistic abilities.

‘And Kallias,’ she sobbed, her tears starting anew. ‘I love him and now I will never get to tell him.’

‘Kallias?’

‘My best friend. I’ve been in love with him since I was sixteen, overweight and desperate to grow some self confidence. He went on a diet with me so I wouldn’t feel alone. He picked me up on his way to school for basically all four years of high school because I was too scared to get a license. He always left secret gifts in my locker when he knew I was on my period, or took me to my favorite bakery. And when he found out I wanted to do arts instead of political science, he became my number one supporter. He even mailed my application for me. How was I supposed not to fall for him?’

‘Wow. That’s really sweet.’

‘I know! He’s such a sweet guy. I’m sure his girlfriend agrees,’ she sighed dejectedly. 

Alis and Feyre exchanged a panicked look. They simply could not sit through another bout of tears.

‘He has a girlfriend?’

‘Well, not exactly. There is this girl in his class, Adrienne, and they meet up a lot to study.’

At Alis and Feyre’s raised brows, she groaned, rubbing her face with both hands.

‘But you should see them! They might as well be dating. She texts him a lot and he always remembers her birthday, when it usually takes him like five weeks to remember people’s names.’

Feyre was dubious. If anything, Kallias seemed to have feelings for Viviane, not whoever this Adrienne girl was. ‘Okay…’

‘Oh, and she has this nickname for him that’s just ridiculous. Kally Bear. Who the fuck comes up with such a stupid nickname? Actually, no.’ Viviane straightened, composing herself. ‘I shouldn’t act like this. I really like Adrienne. She’s nice and she always asks me to come with them when they hang out.’

Alis shrugged. ‘I don’t see why you mind them being together, since you’re always there too.’

‘Oh, I never actually go with them.’

‘What? » Feyre asked incredulously. ‘Why not?’

‘It’s not like she means it. I’m sure she just invites me to be polite. So I tell them to have a good time and send them on their way.’

‘Viviane,’ Alis started carefully. ‘Are you sure Kallias is even interested in Adrienne?’

Viviane pursed her lips. ‘Pretty sure. One time, we were playing truth or dare and I asked him if there was anyone he liked. He said yes, but he didn’t know how to ask her out. He was afraid she would say no and ruin their friendship.’

‘But that could be any friend of his,’ Alis pointed out, her voice blank and ever so careful, the tone she would use on a deranged animal she didn’t want to spook. Or, in this case, a lovesick drunkard she didn’t want to encourage with false hope.

‘She’s his only female friend. Aside from me, that is.’

Feyre had no such qualms. ‘Could be you, then.’

Viviane’s shoulders slumped. ‘No.’

From the way she finished the rest of her drink in one shot and called for seconds, studiously avoiding eye contact, Feyre guessed the conversation to be over.

‘Gotta go powder my nose,’ she said as she stumbled away to the loo.

Oh, how she loved British expressions.

She chuckled on her way, trying her best not to bump into people, and failing miserably as she collided into a deliciously muscled chest.

‘Archeron.’

She looked up at her nemesis. Oh, she had gotten him well.

She couldn’t stop the smirk that bloomed on her face as she replied, ‘Rhysand, darling.’

His eyes narrowed. ‘Darling? What did you do?’

‘What, so you’re the only one allowed to call me that?’

‘You hate it when I call you that.’

She tapped a finger against her chin. ‘True. But I like it when I call you that. You are such a darling,’ she giggled - actually giggled. ‘Especially when you don’t know what’s coming to you.’

Rhysand’s voice was stern. ‘Feyre.’

‘Feyre? Oh my, what a special day it is when Rhysand Fahrenheit calls me by my given name. Did you run out of sarcastic endearments?’

‘I saw you with the new girl.’

Her smirk grew infinitely wider. ‘Did you, now?’

‘What did you tell her?’

‘Nothing you haven’t heard before, I’m sure.’

‘Feyre.’

‘You can keep gritting your teeth till you choke on their dust, and I won’t tell you.’

He breathed deeply, loudly. Once, twice.

‘I can’t deal with you while I’m still sober.’

‘Then go get yourself a drink. And while you’re at it, maybe get one for your boyfriend, too.’

He froze in the middle of turning around, his violet eyes flashing in the dim light of the bar. Oh, how she longed to paint this moment. The Devil Defeated, she would call it.

‘Wait. What did you say?’

‘Funny. Those are the exact words Viviane said when I told her you were gay. A match made in heaven, the two of you. Too bad it’s never going to happen.’

‘You… what?’

‘Are your ears going bad, Rhysand? Are you already that old?’

He rolled his eyes. ‘I am two years older than you, Feyre. And what. the. fuck?’

‘I wasn’t going to let you break another girl’s heart, was I?’

He tensed, anger swirling in his eyes. A second later, he changed. His tense shoulders slowly loosened. He tucked his hands in his pockets, and tilted his head roguishly. His eyes sparkled with devilish amusement, and his favorite smirk perched on his lips. It was not a noticeable change, not if you didn’t know what to look for. But Feyre was a pro in Rhys metamorphosis, as she liked to call it. She watched it all unfold in less than a heartbeat, trying in vain to catch all the details. Somehow, she could never capture it on canvas. Her paintings never had the same vibe-or enough flair.

‘What business is it of yours, Feyre darling, which hearts I choose to break?’

His sensual voice reminded her of silken sheets and sinful touches, and ironically startled her awake. ‘Unlike you, Rhysand, I do happen to care for the common good.’

His smirk was insufferable. ‘You don’t strike me as a selfless person.’

‘Maybe I should strike you, period.’

He leaned forward. ‘How about we strike a bargain instead, darling. You stay away from my business, and I try not to break your heart next.’

She crept forward as well, unwilling to lose the unspoken game, even as her heart beat a tattoo in her chest. He was so close she could touch him. If she dared.

‘Break my heart, Rhysand. I dare you.’

His breath caressed her own when he spoke next. ‘Is that a challenge?’

She snaked a hand between them and laid it flat on the center of his chest. His heartbeat ricocheted against her palm. She smirked. ‘Is it?’

His pupils flared. She gazed into his eyes for what felt like an eternity, transfixed.

Cauldron, she hated his eyes.

She flipped her hair defiantly as she sauntered off, hips swinging, reveling in the way his eyes trailed her the entire way to the bathroom.

Tag list: @joyceortiz13 @bailey-4244

#feysand au #feysand fanfic #feysand #mine #my fanfic #acotar fanfic #acotar au #acotar #acomaf au #acomaf fanfic #acomaf #acowar au #acowar fanfic #acowar #otp #my writing #viviane #kallias #alis #rhys x feyre #feyre x rhys #feyre x rhysand #feyre darling #feyre archeron #rhysand #court of dreams #a court of thorns and roses #night court

[taigasgloss]

sorry i took so long but thank you for tagging me @ocular-intercourse !!! :D

🌿 favourite comfort food: i think i really like anything where my whole family is involved, makes the food taste way better. I havent really got any go-to’s these days but when I felt down at uni i would make hot chocolate allllllll the time, it tastes way better if u make it on the stove with almond or soy milkk :)

🌼 favourite alcohol: good vodka and cocktails are my favourite. After lockdown im seriously looking forward to going out and getting a white russian!

🌷 favourite relaxing activity: writing, singing and drawing. im getting super into writing and reading again, its so easy to get inspired. doing work is also kind of relaxing cuz i know at least im being productive.

🌸 favourite fluffy/feel good fic: i literally just found the cutest majimako fic yesterday omfghdjhdf. Its a high school AU where makoto is a new transfer student. She’s still blind and deliquent majima starts helping her out and they become friends ahhh its so sweet. i’m looking forward to more chapters hopefully ;_; <3 https://archiveofourown.org/works/21781162/chapters/51971677

🌻 favourite calming scent: (ahhh yess, i know what you mean! i love the summer afternoon scent too. defo one of my favourites) I also really like the smell of hot/dry countries, it makes reminds me of the middle east and family. Vanilla and coconut are favourites too. I really vividly remember some hand soaps for some reason lmao and theres a handful that smell really amazing and nostalgic to a really good time in my life. They’re like ‘milk and honey’ and ones with jojoba oil in them. theyre amazingg.

🌺 favourite relaxing/uplifting song: love4eva - LOONA always picks me up no matter whatt ;_; <3

🌵 favourite white noise: if the birds are chirping outside then i like that sometimes but mostly just random youtube lets plays, right now im watch ace attorney. I used to allllways use overwatch twitch streams but im not that into overwatch anymore (rip)

🍄 favourite book to get lost in: any romance book/manga/comic is nice or psychology journals, theyre so interestingg

💐 favourite chill tv show: i like brooklyn 99 or the goldbergs!! i think the goldbergs are my faves <3 I also rlly like soap operas but even i can admit the plots are pretty rubbish sometimes loooool

🌹 the best advice you’ve ever had: i dont really know tbh, i don’t really get given a lot of advice from people even if i ask or at least i cant remember anything right now ? T_T I think the best advice i have given myself is that you gotta accept that youre not perfect so you can get better and that intention only gets you so far. Your actions have to match your words and intentions to get better, theres no use ignoring your flaws because then you cant ever hope to get over them. right now i think im trying to learn how to learn from my mistakes, its pretty easy to figure out what you did wrong in the past but im trying to navigate how i should correct them in the future :) (hope that doesnt sound basic or confusing haha)

i’ll tag @nishikishighwaistedpants , @chopsfluffed & @mey51 (No worries if you dont want to :D ) if anyone sees this and thinks it would be fun then tag me !! I hope youre all doing well !!

#i love these uwu #shh if u saw the first time i posted this lmaooo i forgot to answer a question #tag games

[tanadrin]

hey *whispers* hey. hey. i saw your post in the wow tag. i would read THE SHIT out of your interpretation of wow lore. i have homework right now but i think i might just read through your blog a bit. the characters have always been such a high point for me (listen. i know knaak did a lot of shit. but you can pry Krasus from my cold dead hands he was EVERYTHING to middle school me) and i feel so conflicted over what theyve done to the characters - sylvanas, anduin, everyone. would love ur take

You might be a little disappointed, most of my blog isn’t about WoW (it postdates my WotLK raiding/RP guild phase, and I’ve only just recently got back into it with Classic). Lots of opinions on WoW characters below the cut.

I actually don’t hate Krasus as a character. He’s fine, he’s not a Designated Idiot Ball Carrier like some of the others are. In re: the dragons generally, I don’t like the simplistic thing WoW lore does a lot where one faction leader going bonkers turns the whole faction into baddies for no apparent reason, because all political entities are monoliths except when they’re not. I’m also not a huge fan of how crowded the, erm, metahuman bureaucracy on Azeroth has become in the lore–like, the Keepers and the Dragon Aspects serve similar roles, and the lore could have done fine with one or the other, and the dragons were here first (and Ysera and Alexstrasza are BAMFs), and so should get to stay.

Sylvanas is bae, obviously, and Sylvanas as Warchief was a terrific move plotwise. I think it’s a pity they had to kill Vol’jin to do it (because I am also very here for Warchief Vol’jin), but she is obviously the more interesting choice. Speaking of Warchiefs:

Thrall doesn’t have the Green Jesus Marty Stu quite as bad as some people think, but he does kinda have it, and I don’t see them grappling quite with the fact that he done fucked up. Like, not only did he install a Warchief who should have had all smart members of the Horde tugging at their collars nervously when he started his rule, Garrosh turned into a Sha-summoning Old God-corrupted, casual-atrocity-perpetrating maniac, not to mention all the bullshit on Old Draenor I do my best to forget about lest my blood pressure spike. We don’t really get a satisfying mea culpa from Thrall for that, and then his response is to fuck off to fiddle around with the Earthen Ring for a bit, before retiring to a farm in Nagrand. Keep in mind, one of the whole reasons the Horde came together in its current shape in the first place is because of the charismatic, hopeful figure of Thrall. It ran the very real risk of splintering under Garrosh for good (ESPECIALLY after the murder of Cairne, RIP Cairne Bloodhoof, you were too good for this world), and even the most unifying successor (which I think Vol’jin was) didn’t have Thrall’s inclusive, unifying vision. Sylvanas doesn’t, either, and even more, is sort of low-key hated by everybody else, so while I don’t think she’s a maniac like Garrosh who would recklessly divide the Horde, she’s also not, I am forced to admit, necessarily the ideal Warchief from a political standpoint.

Even if he didn’t return to the post of Warchief, Thrall had a moral obligation after the Garrosh debacle to try to help hold the Horde together and heal the divisions his negligence caused. At least to throw his support behind Garrosh’s successors, and not to pretend that Deathwing’s death meant everything was OK forever, job done. And if he wasn’t going to do that (and he has excellent motivations for not wanting to do that!), I think the consequences of that have to be explored. I think some people would blame him, and be justified in doing so. I think somebody like Varok Saurfang, who has had decades of experience with the damage bad leaders could do, would rightly be a little pissed, even as he sought Thrall out for help, that Thrall had let the Horde he built languish under subpar leadership. Thrall has been selfish–and that’s great, because he desperately needed some character flaws more significant than “cares too much” and “believes in people a lot.”

Anduin: better than Varian, still a little bland? Varian was a Professional Idiot Ball Handler, who seemed to do stuff not out of a coherent conception of his character, but just because the plot required a Generic Human King to do it. Plus there was all that stuff with the cloning and the kidnapping that never really made any sense. I like Anduin’s optimism; I like that he feels like a thoughtful, reasonable guy, who’s doing his best in often-impossible circumstances. I feel like they could show him being a little more frustrated sometimes, though, and a little pissed at people like Jaina who obstinately refuse to do the strategically correct thing even if it means setting aside their resentments for a bit. Disclaimer: I play almost exclusively Horde toons, they may address this better in the Alliance quests in WoW.

But oh man, besides the Draenei, I hate most what they did to Jaina. Jaina was that rare jewel, an optimist in a world whose setting demands perpetual chaos. Yes, yes, Theramore and the mana bomb, I’m not suggesting she should be made of stone, but it breaks her character to have her suddenly go from someone trying to forge a lasting peace between the Horde and Alliance in WC3–to the point where she would see her own father dead–to someone who now blames the whole Horde as one no exceptions for what happened at Theramore. Should she struggle with grief and pain and anger? Absolutely. But she should deal with them in more complex ways than “now I am become the mirror image of Daelin.” Nevermind that even if she did that she should at least regret not listening to him back in WC3. (Do they address that in BFA with the introduction of Kul Tiras? Idk, I haven’t played BFA at all yet.) It seems like Jaina’s role now is to be the Person Who Hates The Horde, and honestly, that’s a tired trope. It’s just not interesting, it has no nuance, it has no interesting outcomes. You could maybe get away with it with the generation of leaders from the Second War like Daelin and Genn who knew the Orcs only as the fel-corrupted servants of the Burning Legion, but it’s obvious to anyone with two brain cells to rub together than the current Horde is a very different animal politically and strategically, so even if you hate the Orcs with a burning passion, that is not going to transfer to the Tauren, nevermind onetime allies like the Blood Elves.

Gul’dan: oh my god the time travel plot was so stupid. Did the whole universe get duplicated in the alternate timeline? Since travel between the universes is cheap and easy that means there’s a whole nother Burning Legion with a whole nother Sargeras out there that’s still a huge fricking threat! Not to mention a whole nother Azeroth! Did just Draenor get duplicated? That doesn’t seem to match up with the fact a lot of the Burning Legion characters in WoD seem to be parallel universe versions of Burning Legion villains we already know, but it’s not directly confirmed or disconfirmed. Is it some sort of weird Bronze Dragonflight timey-wimey thing that doesn’t have its own independent reality? Ok, fine, but obviously this alternate Draenor has enough of an independent existence for us to visit it again and see what it’s like decades later, not to mention bring some of the people there back. Gul’dan was a fine, if one-dimensional villain but bringing him back from the dead was dumb, dumb, dumb, in a setting where death often feels meaningless and seems to be reversible at random. And the general incoherence of magic in the setting combined with the perennial incoherence of time travel plots (Gollum voice: *we hates them!*) really just reduced WoD to a quivering mess of plot holes, like febrile fan speculation made manifest.

Tirion Fordring: good example of a purely heroic character done well, which WoW has few of. I think because he actually has challenges to overcome, and he doesn’t feel like an idiot.

Bolvar Fordragon: Literally did not know or care who this guy was until the Wrathgate cinematic, but what they did after that with his character was terrific, 10/10.

Malfurion, Tyrande, Illidan: These characters all bore me to tears. My WotLK main was a druid, and I’m a big fan of the druid lore, so I wanna like Malfurion, I really do, but he’s just so dull. Partly because it doesn’t feel like he has any real limitations on his power, just whatever the plot demands he be able to do or not do at any given moment, partly because he just feels like a stiff-necked scold. Tyrande is even more one-dimensional. Illidan is pure 3edgy5me, and the demon hunters in general feel like they get to be too cool to actually traffic in any of the pathos of what should be their emotional equivalents like the Death Knights and the Forsaken. It’s like, “oh man, my life is so tormented, I have these bitchin’ horns and tattoos, and I’m, like, totally immortal, here, hold my rad sword thingies for a second.” At least with the Death Knights you get the feeling that being a Death Knight is a genuinely miserable experience, so there’s some genuine conflict at the heart of the class: sure, you play as a hero, but not the kind of hero you’d necessarily want to be. Demon hunters are just pissed they don’t get to sit at the cool kids’ lunch table, and Illidan genuinely acts like a giant asshole and then gets self-righteous and whiny when his friends and family are like “Dude! Stop being such an asshole!” There’s room for a prickly character, who’s a dick, but who’s our dick, and maybe that’s what they were going for, but Illidan is just the worst.

Azshara, Lady Vashj: The Naga were a giant fucking mistake. A symptom of the inability to let backstory stay backstory, to have to resurrect and retread the same events over and over again that plagues serials when lesser writers without original ideas get let loose on them. Settings like WoW (like Star Wars, like Star Trek, like Dune) are whole universes. You should be expanding the borders, making them feel bigger, more fine-grained, more alive, not beating the same major characters to death over and over again. The ancient Kaldorei are way more interesting as a lost past and a lesson in hubris than fish-snake-people who live under the sea.

Also, water levels are dumb and I hate them. This applies to coral-and-shellfish themed zones regardless of whether swimming is involved.

Cho’gall: I loved the “insane nihilist death cult” reincarnation of the Twilight’s Hammer Clan in World of Warcraft, and Cho’gall as the many-eyed crazed ogre mage with two heads was great. Would much rather have more Cho’gall than Guldan 2.0.

While I’m on Cataclysm: one thing you don’t often feel in worlds like WoW is the possibility of real defeat, because for extradiegetic reasons, it’s impossible to truly lose in any long-lasting way (or, in quests like Battle for the Undercity in WotLK, they just… don’t let you, which feels dumb as heck). I’ve always been fascinated by the idea of a post-apocalyptic fantasy world, a world where the bad guys won, and all the worst things the good guys feared came to pass. I think this is one reason I loved the original interpretation of the Draenei so much, because we saw in Draenor what that really looked like. It was bleak, and it was poignant, and even though it was set within a silly melodrama, it actually moved me. Cataclysm did something similar with the postapocalyptic time-travel instance (time travel being used well for once in WoW!), where you saw that Deathwing’s victory wasn’t just an abstract possibility, but a thing that could actually happen. It made the possibility of defeat feel more real, and it gave you a taste of that same bleak, poignant feeling: this, it said (just for a moment!) is what failure looks like, an Azeroth without life, without hope, in which everything you ever struggled for was utterly in vain. And that motivated you to work even harder to prevent it.

Alleria, Turalyon: “You last saw us in WC2, and since then we’ve been fighting a thousand years (subjective) of endless war against the Burning Legion and been irrevocably changed by the experience” is actually pretty great! But if I were going to rewrite WoW lore, I would make that a thousand objective years and set the final victory over the Burning Legion in the future, at a time when the Alliance and Horde have made a durable peace, and Azeroth has moved on from decades of endless war. I think there’s a real problem with trying to make the player one of the heroes that brings down Sargeras for good because it’s *such* an epic battle, but it’s a massively multiplayer game. Making every player the grand master of their class order was bad enough, but when you are obviously playing out entirely different diegesis from everyone around you, even if you didn’t have problems like sharding and a glut of phasing and cross-server activities and instant teleportation to dungeons, it really feels like a single-player RPG with a chat function. I mean, conflicting diegeses is always going to be a problem with questing-based MMOs, but suspension of disbelief worked when you were plainly one person embedded in a larger effort, like in vanilla, BC, and WotLK. But “you are one of thousands of people who is the Best Warrior Ever and sole Leader of the Warriors, and who has the Only Artifact Weapon that somehow also has thousands of copies”… yeah, that just doesn’t work for me. I feel like I’m being pandered to, and not in a fun way, like with the Pandaren.

Sargeras: I like that they retconned Sargeras to have a better motivation than “demons made me nihilistic.” The idea of a void-corrupted titan being something so terrible a member of the Pantheon would shatter worlds to prevent it is interesting. But the Void gods still feel… kinda non-threatening? We don’t see them actively working to threaten anything we really care about, the Void is mostly a pretty passive abstract force like the Light, and in general I feel like the setting isn’t really dualistic, but er… trialistic? Is that a word? In that there’s a three-way opposition between the Void, the Light, and the Nether/Arcane, from the perspective of which each is the opponent of both of the others, but that’s never laid out explicitly anywhere.

#wow #wow lore #world of warcraft #sylvanas #thrall #jaina proudmoore #warlords of draenor was the WORST #and Legion wasn't much better plotwise

[byunskjm-blog]

Try Again

Genre: Angst

Pairing: Junmyeon x Reader

Length: 4k

Masterlist

TW: Mentions of miscarriages

Being married to a doctor is stressful, but imagine marrying a surgeon. When you married Junmyeon you expected life to be easy. You had it all planned out. You were gonna graduate from University and begin your life as a teacher, the love of your life was supposed to fall into your lap, metaphorically of course, and you were supposed to live a fairytale. And for the most part that’s what happened. Three years into University you took your normal train ride to get to school, but God had something in store for you that morning. Apparently, when you said you wanted the love of your life to fall into your lap, the big man upstairs took it literally. Due to the shakiness of the train car you felt a heavy weight fall on you. Little did you know that man would be the person you chose to love in sickness and health. It just so happened that he went to the same University as you. It’s odd how life works sometimes, you could have gone your whole life without knowing who he was, but because of one shaky train ride, he ended up being your greatest love. 

It was impossible not to see him, suddenly he was always near you, right in front of your eyes. Maybe he was always there but only now you were able to see him. He was in his 2nd year of Med school whilst you were one year away from graduation. Both of you decided that maybe friendship was a good option, it was just not the right time to go into a serious relationship. Rapidly, you and Junmyeon became close. You had friends in University, you even had your roommate. But they weren’t him. With him, everything came effortlessly. You found yourself talking to him every chance you got, even if it were about the silliest things like if kimbap or bibimbap was better. You shared your secrets and he shared his and that’s the way it was for 2 years. 

In your senior year of Uni, you began seeing Oh Sehun, easy to say Junmyeon wasn’t a fan. He always claimed you could do better and Sehun wasn’t the one. Back then you thought Sehun was the one, on paper he was perfect for you. But life never follows the guidelines that are laid out. 8 months into the relationship you found him in bed with his TA. The amount of self-control it took Junmyeon to not deck him in the face was immeasurable. It hurt, of course, it hurt, but you didn’t let it hold you back. You simply believed that he wasn’t the one, just like Junmyeon said. It took you a while to open up after Sehun but eventually, you did… for Junmyeon. 

After a long night with a bottle of Tequila things were said, things you’d never thought you would hear in this lifetime anyway. “You know what men ain’t shit,” you slurred with the bottle in your hand. 

“I told you so,” Junmyeon said just as hammered as you. 

“You just had to say it didn’t you,” eyes narrowed at him as if you could burn a hole through him if you focused hard enough. 

He shrugged, “What can I say it’s my job.” 

You rolled your eyes, “So tell me Mr. Hotshot. If he wasn’t the one for me, then who is?” The room was silent as you waited for an answer. “Because right now I feel like there is absolutely no-” 

“Me.” It happened so quick you had no time to properly process his words. You looked at him, pure shock in your eyes, after almost 3 years as best friends he finally made his move. Then as if you were living some cheesy rom-com, he leaned and kissed you. It was soft, sweet, and cliche as hell because all you saw during the kiss was fireworks.

Both of you made your feelings for each other clear and from then on it was pretty straight forward. Days turned into months, months into years and soon enough he was on one knee proposing. Timing was never your guys’ theme, he proposed on the same day you found out he would possibly be leaving the country. “I can’t say yes unless I know you won’t leave.” You were upset because you wanted to say yes more than anything. But you can’t plan a future when you didn’t even know if he was staying or not. “I’m not leaving. Of course, I’m not leaving. I’m not crazy. So can you please say yes already? My knee is hurting.” As if it were second nature you nodded your head as he slipped the ring on your finger. 

That’s how you found yourself married to Korea’s most renowned surgeon. You both came to an agreement to start a family when he finished his residency. It was a good plan, but plans never went accordingly. Four years into your relationship you discovered you were pregnant. It came as a shock to the both of you, you both were always so careful. With this pregnancy came a lot of arguments. Junmyeon was overwhelmed and stressed and that transferred over to you. 

“You’re never home Junmyeon!” You yelled in frustration. 

“I’m a fucking surgeon! What do you expect?!” He fired back just as enraged. Maybe it was the hormones, but you were crying and Junmyeon was instantly filled with regret. “I’m sorry. It’s just you knew what you were signing up for when you married me.” 

You let out a heavy sigh and looked up at him with teary eyes. “I did know what I signed up for, but did you?” He was confused by your words. “When you married me you knew what I wanted in life. You knew I wanted a family, a home, happiness. And I postponed all that for you. For your goddamn career. I can’t wait any longer Junmyeon. Either you begin to prioritize me or you lose me altogether.” 

He carded a hand through his hair. To him, he felt wronged, he felt misunderstood. “That’s not fair and you know it. You can’t make me choose between you and my career.” 

You let out a scoff of disdain. “It shouldn’t even be a choice to you Junmyeon.”

You left that night, leaving him to think of where he went wrong and why you were so hurt by his actions. You were still in your first trimester when everything happened. You had been spending nights at your best friends house. Junmyeon would try to contact you but not as often as you thought he would. Messages were left unread, phone calls unanswered, voicemails untouched.

To you, it was just another day at work. You woke up, got ready and made your daily commute to work. The kids were hyper as normal and you appreciated it. They gave you the energy you needed. You were breaking up a fight between two students fighting over the same toy. Then you felt a liquid running down your thighs. The cramping in your stomach was excruciating. Your first thought, your baby. Your hand flew to your stomach to feel your small protruding bump. The kids around you were scared and so were you.

“It’s ok.” You told one of your kids. “Can you go next door and call Miss. Park?” You asked softly trying not to worry them even though internally you wanted to cry. He bolted off toward the room and when he came back he was with an adult. A friend you could trust. Her eyes went wide when she saw you kneeling on the floor with your hands on your stomach. She wanted to make a scene but you calmly told her to call the ambulance and don’t worry the kids. She followed your instructions and within in a few minutes, an ambulance showed up to wheel you away.

“Do you want me to call Junmyeon?” She asked as you were lifted into the ambulance.

You shook your head, “No, just make sure the kids are ok and tell them I’ll be fine.” The paramedics were trying to examine you to see what was wrong. “I’m having a miscarriage,” You simply stated.

Both their eyes went wide. You didn’t need some doctor to tell you what you already knew. Your baby was gone.

You knew all the signs, perks of marrying a doctor. Everything felt too surreal, you wanted to cry, you should’ve cried, but nothing came out. All you felt was numbness. To make things even better you were taken to Junmyeon’s hospital. How were you going to tell your husband that you lost the baby he probably didn’t want to begin with?

They wheeled you out the back of the ambulance and listed your information to the doctor who would treat you. A young wide-eyed intern recognized. “Mrs. Kim?” She asked with a shock expression plastering her face.

“Hi, darling.” You smiled like you weren’t in the process of losing your child.

“Do you want me to page Dr. Kim? He is in sur-” You cut her off with a shake of her head.

“He is busy, don’t bother him,” You coldly stated.

“But Mrs. Kim I think he would want to know-” Once more you stopped her from finishing your sentence.

“He is in the middle of surgery. I’ll be fine. Don’t page him,” you repeated.

She nodded this time and began her examination. She flipped through your charts. “It says here you are pregnant,” she looked at the clipboard then you looking for confirmation. You nodded. It would be simple to just tell her what was wrong but how will she learn.

This wasn’t normal, what you were doing wasn’t normal. You should have been a crying mess wanting to see your husband. But instead, you were far more concerned with helping an intern learn. She began an ultrasound to try and find a heartbeat but it never came. Then it hit her. “Oh my- I’m so sorry.” She looked at you with nothing but pity in her eyes. She sympathized for you.

“So doctor how do you fix it?” You asked feeling absolutely nothing.

She was frazzled of course she was. “Um… Uh, you can uh.”

You sensed her nervousness and grabbed her hand to calm her. “You know this.”

She gulped and nodded. “You can either go home and wait for the pregnancy tissue to pass or you can do what most doctors recommend, which is to get surgery.” Then the room went silent, waiting on for you to decide.

“I’ll do surgery. But on one condition. I want you in the OR.” Even in these kinds of situations you were absolutely selfless and being the teacher you were.

She left to book the OR and leave you to think over everything. What was wrong with you? Is this how you coped? Were you that numb to the pain? Then you remembered Junmyeon. You knew he was going to find you, it was inevitable. This was where he spent the majority of his life, not home but in this hospital.

Nurses came into prep you for surgery and to go over what the operation will be like. They walked you through it step by step and told you the aftermath. All you did was nod and pretend to listen to them because, to be frank, you didn’t care much about anything at this point. There was always a risk with surgery, success rates came with failures too. Maybe deep down some horrible part of you wish you were one of those failures. It’s not like you had much to lose. You shouldn’t have been thinking like this, you know you shouldn’t have. But that day you were thinking abnormally.

They wheeled you into the OR, the intern stuck by your side still feeling nothing but sorry for you. The least you could do was make yourself useful. You laid on the table and counted back from 10. As each number passed by the groggier you got until everything went black.

Junmyeon finished a 5-hour surgery repairing a heart, he went into the break room to stretch and call you. It’s been weeks since you came home and he knew you well enough to know that you valued your space when you were annoyed or mad. But this has been going on for too long and he was tired of waking up to an empty bed in the morning, at least when he was there.

As usual, you didn’t pick up your phone. “Hey, it’s me. I just want to talk, come home tonight. I’m not on call and I want to fix this.” He sighed on hung up the phone again. He had one more operation to go, it was small and wouldn’t take too much time. He figured if he got finished early he would have enough to go home and cook something for you.

He read the OR board to confirm the OR he was working in, nothing was out of the ordinary until he saw your name. Under it he read a D&C and that’s when all color left his face. As if he was on fire he rushed towards the room you were being operated in. His suspicions were proven right when he saw you on the table, cut open. “Why did no one page me?!” He yelled feeling enraged at the way he found out his wife was undergoing surgery.

The intern who you coerced to not tell Junmyeon looked at him with a mixture of pity and fear in her eyes. “S-she told us not to,” she stuttered out.

“She doesn’t know what she is talking about! I am her husband, your boss! If my wife is having surgery I should be the first to know!” He continued his scolding.

The main surgeon who was performing the procedure finally spoke up, “Dr. Kim I respect your feelings but I need you to leave my OR,” his voice just as firm as Junmyeon’s.

“Excuse me? Did you not hear me the first time? That’s my wife on that table!” Junmyeon threw back feeling offended he would even suggest such a thing.

“I understand that but since she is your wife you have to be outside like any other family member would. She is my patient and I will respect her wishes, and if one of those wishes is to not have you here then I will kindly ask you to leave my OR once more.” His composure remained intact, it had to, he was operating on you.

Junmyeon knew both sides of the coin, as a doctor, he knew it was unethical for him to be in the room when the surgeon asked you to leave. As a husband, it was heartbreaking to leave you behind so vulnerable. But if you didn’t want him in the room he would abide by your wishes and leave. He left the OR only to go back to your room and pace uncontrollably. How far along were you? How’d it happen? Why didn’t you tell him sooner? Why wasn’t he there? No matter which perspective he took on in everyone he was a dick. In every angle, he had chosen his career over you. He had let you go through all this alone. He had let you down. Through good times and bad, that’s what he vowed, yet there you were, right under his nose, and he had no idea at all. Did he really ruin his marriage? In times like these he hated his job, he hated his ego and his pride. If it weren’t for those three things he would’ve known. He would’ve been there.

D&C’s were usually quick and short but minutes felt like days to him as he waited for you to come back. When you finally did you were still asleep due to the anesthesia. Your doctor told him about everything, from the miscarriage to the surgery. He treated Junmyeon like a worried husband and not a know it all surgeon.

“This will take a toll on her more mentally and emotionally than physically.” He said looking at Junmyeon’s hand holding yours. “All I can say for that is be there. Take a leave of absence, because these are times when you need each other the most.”

Junmyeon nodded, “Thank you,” he said softly. The doctor cracked a half-hearted smile and left you two alone. He never thought in a million years he’d see you like this. After weeks of not looking at the freckle on your cheekbone or the brown eyes that brought out your beautiful smile, here you were. He cried, hard. He cried while you were unconscious because he knew after that he would have to be your rock. Apology after apology, it was non-stop till your eyes cracked open, absorbing the bright light. There was a sharp pain in your abdomen, as expected. Using the hand that wasn’t being occupied you caressed your now empty belly. You knew it was different now, there was a void.

You glanced to your right and saw Junmyeon looking at you with the same look that intern gave you, the same look everyone from here on out would give you. Even your husband pitied you. He moved the hair that covered your face so he could see you in your entirety.

“I’m sorry.” You said softly. You were apologizing because you failed.

“No. You don’t apologize for something you had no control over ok?” He said looking at you with glossy eyes. “If anything I owe you everything. I should have been there, I should have known.” You guys were trying to place the blame on yourselves. Junmyeon listed where he went wrong in this whole thing. How he wasn’t thinking clearly and how he should have fought harder for you. But you couldn’t shake the feeling that it was all your fault. You left, you hid the baby, you had the miscarriage. So you couldn’t blame Junmyeon for any of it because at the end of the day you were the cause. But even in the midst of confrontation, not a single tear left your dry eyes. The numbness never faded.

Junmyeon told you that you would be able to go home tomorrow but where was home? Home hasn’t been what it was before. Of course, Junmyeon would be the one to take you back, he told you all about his leave of absence on how he was going to be there for you. You should have been happy but happiness was such a concept to you now. It didn’t come as easy as it once did.

So as said, the next day Junmyeon took you back to the two-story loft you shared and called home. Saying the house was messy was an understatement better left unsaid. It’s not like Junmyeon had time to clean up after himself, he barely had time to breathe. He had set up the bedroom for you, making sure you had everything you needed on hand. You missed the comfort of your bed, it’s been 3 long weeks without it.

As you laid down and stared into oblivion Junmyeon began talking. “I was thinking, maybe we should go see a therapist.”

It was a suggestion you made before but Junmyeon turned it down due to his busy schedule. Now you weren’t sure if you wanted to sit and talk about all the feelings you kept bottled up. Instead, you came up with some bogus excuse, “I’ll have to see. I have a lot going on with school this month.”

He looked at you in shock, “Why are you going back so soon?”

Because I can’t be here. That’s what you wanted to say but instead, you said, “Because I have 27 little kids who depend on me, I have plans made and promises to keep.” That was a secret jab that was unintentional yet satisfying.

“Sweetie you just had surgery. Something traumatic just happened. You need time to recover.” He was now by your side again looking at you with eyes you once adored.

“I lost my baby. It happens. I’ll be fine.” You said it so nonchalantly it scared him. “Go back to work if you want. It’s ok. It’ll be ok.” It sounded like you were trying to convince yourself more than him.

The last thing Junmyeon wanted was to upset you or push you too far. So he nodded and continued cleaning up.

You did what was necessary: you slept, you ate, you showered, and you breathed. That was all you could ask for. You decided to return to school next Monday which was in 2 days. Junmyeon was still wary of that plan but he wasn’t gonna be the one to stop you from working because that would be quite hypocritical. When Monday rolled around you got up like it was any other day, but this time Junmyeon was there to see you off to work. When you were about to leave he stopped you once more.

“Are you sure about this? I’m sure they’ll understand if you come back next week.” Of course, he was worried about you, ever since that day all he did was worry about you and the more you said you were fine the less he believed it.

“Junmyeon I’ll be fine.” How could you be so calm about everything? This was far from fine. Even though Junmyeon got the ok for him to go back to work he didn’t. He stayed home to care for you and watch you.

As suspected you threw yourself into your work and quickly you canceled everything out.There was always some school play you were helping with or an after-school tutoring session. Making yourself preoccupied was second hand to you.

After your first week back you took a bath. The hot water warmed up your skin and soon you closed your eyes in serenity. Lower and lower you slipped till you were completely submerged. After the first 15 seconds you should’ve came up for air but there you were going into your second minute. You closed your eyes and let the rest figure itself out. Slowly you began to fade into a deeper sleep till finally you were pulled by a pair of hands.

You coughed up some swallowed water and gasped for air. “Are you OK?!” You wiped your face and stepped out the bath like nothing happened.

“I’m f-“

“PLEASE STOP WITH THE ‘I'm fines ’ and the ‘I’m Ok’ I can’t take it anymore! You aren’t fine and when will you realize it?!” After weeks of stepping on eggshells around you, he was done. “You nearly drowning in the tub isn’t fine! You going back to work less than a week after a miscarriage isn’t ok! Why are you insisting it is?!” His gaze hard on yours.

“Because if I’m not fine and ok then I’m sad.” You said softly wrapping a robe around your body.

“And what is so wrong with that? You have every right to be sad! It’s not gonna kill you to show a shred of emotion!”

You laughed and shook your head at his comment.

He looked at you bewildered at what about any of this could be funny.

“But the thing is, it is gonna kill me. If I don’t pretend to be fine then I have to face reality. And my reality is my baby died, it’s dead and there is nothing I can do about it.” The tears gathered at your waterline. “I need to be fine because if I’m not then I’m just stuck with self-pity and I already get enough of that from everyone. So please Junmyeon just let me pretend to be ok because that’s the only way I can keep breathing.”

Your first tear fell and Junmyeon caught it. His hands cupped your warm cheeks as he gazed into your brown eyes. “We can try again. I promise you we will have a family.”

You gave a weak smile, “Don’t make promises you can’t keep Jun.”

“I’ll leave. I’ll quit my job. I’ll prove to you that this is what I want. That you are what I want.”

You knew he was being serious that’s why you shook your head. “We’ve been through this once and you made it abundantly clear where your priorities lie. I’m not gonna be the person who lets you throw $100,000’s of dollars out the window just because you feel bad.”

He was taken aback at how blunt you were. “Is that what you honestly think of me? You think that I’m throwing my career away because I feel bad?”

You nodded, “Why else would you do it?”

He removed his hands from you, suddenly feeling too close to comfort. “Maybe because I love my wife. Maybe because I have vows to keep.”

You scoffed at his words, “Those vows didn’t seem to matter when I needed it to the most. Through sickness and in health?” You paused and look at him with your glossy eyes. “I was pregnant for more than a month and you were to busy to even notice.”

“You should have told m-”

You cut him off, “How? You aren’t even home half the time. What would have changed if I told you? You would have still been working, you would have still chosen surgery over me, over us,” guilt-tripping was such an understatement.

“I work to give you this home, those designer clothes, and bags. I work for you!” Junmyeon said in clear frustration.

“Is that what you tell yourself? Do you wake up every morning and get ready for me? Do you cut people open for me? Do you overexert yourself for me?” He was silent. “Because I didn’t ask you to do any of that? I didn’t ask for any of this. All I asked for was you,” you looked at him with hurt eyes. “You were the one thing I didn’t have. Yeah sure I should be grateful for the life I have but it fucking sucks when your husband doesn’t even have time for you. I would choose the life of women who have a loving husband over this one any day.”

Every blow went deeper and deeper until eventually, someone had to stop it. “This is going nowhere,” Junmyeon let out an exhausted sigh running his hands over his face.

“It’s not. And I don’t think it will.” You agreed with him.

“So what are we gonna do? Stay like this forever?” His gaze fixated on you.

You shook your head no, “I don’t intend to. I can’t live like this anymore Junmyeon.” Her eyes welled up with tears.

“Then what do you suggest we do? I already offered to leave my job, there isn’t much more I can give.”

“I can’t let you do that. I can’t have you resenting me. I-I think it’s best if I leave for a while.”

His eyes shot up again. His head shook his head furiously. “N-no you can’t leave. Not again.” His hands found your face and held it softly.

“I need to. This,” she signaled back and forth between them. “This isn’t healthy for either of us. It’ll be for a month or so. I need to leave and find out what I want.”

He looked deep into your eyes, “Do you not want this anymore? Is this marriage not enough for you?”

Now it was your turn to feel guilty. You broke eye contact to let your eyes fall to the floor with your tears. “I-I don’t know what I want anymore Junmyeon. That’s why I need time to figure it out and being around you in this house will only make it worse.”

His forehead pressed against yours as his tears dropped. “How am I going to keep going without you?” He breathed out.

“You’ve been doing that for a while now Junmyeon. You can live without me. I need to know if I can live without you.”

#junmyeon scenario #junmyeon imagine #junmyeon scenarios #junmyeon imagines #junmyeon x reader #junmyeon angst #junmyeon fic #suho scenario #suho imagine #suho scenarios #suho imagines #suho x reader #suho angst #suho fanfic #suho fic

[jeannereames]

hi if it's not a too personal question to ask how did you come to be interested in history/antiquity/alexander..? I mean did you always like it as a child? or how did it start?

It’s not too personal, and in fact, I LIKE to tell this story, as I’m the definition of coming in the back door, which might encourage others.

Understand, I’m a chick from the other side of the tracks. My generation was the first to get a college education, and I’m among the few to go on to grad school, especially not professional *(e.g., law or med school). I was lower middle-class growing up. My father is from one of the two poorest families in Jackson County, S. Illinois before (and after) WWII. My mother was better off, her father a successful farmer and carpenter, but the Brouillettes had been Catholic (even if he wasn’t), and (worse) they had Indian blood.

There was no silver spoon in my mouth. I had better: wonderful parents who cheer-leaded me all the way. So if you disbelieve a father as great as Amyntor could exist? That’s MY parents. Amyntor-Berenikē are real, and their names were Ed and Idalee. Rise is dedicated to my father. Some of us get that lucky, and I’m HUGELY aware of my fortune, especially as I aged and realized my fellows didn’t have parents like mine. So Hephaistion’s desire to share his father with Alexandros? That was me. All my friends came to my house to visit my mother.

My love of history owes entirely to HER. She loved history, and understood it was about the stories of people. But my elementary and junior high history teachers made it about “kings-n-things” with lots of dates, etc.

So I HATED history.

I hated it all through regular school, then my tenure at UF, where (despite being a humanities major) I AVOIDED all history classes except one, an elective on the history of the Early Church. I think it’s pretty much a crime that a humanities major anywhere can graduate without a history class. WTF?

Yet it’s all the fault of poorly taught history. Plus, yes, younger students are less inclined to understand why it matters. Not all, but a substantial portion regularly return surveys saying history doesn’t matter because it’s the past, not the future.

Back to my clever mother. Instead of teaching me history, she told me about my family: the story of my ancestors, my people, including my tribe (Miami-Peoria). I was routinely hauled around to cemeteries as a kid, shown where my people were buried, and then told stories about them. Respect for Elders and the ancestors is a native thing. Yet I became fascinated, constructed family trees, and tried to trace back their stories, as most of my mother’s family were French who came in the 1600s/early 1700s, or Native Americans. My father’s family were more recent immigrants, but it all made a wonderful puzzle.

The story of me.

That’s history. The story of us, more broadly.

And so my clever, sneaky mother taught me to love history by coming in the back door.

Yet as a teen and undergrad, my interest in other cultures were largely Celtic and Scandinavian. I was introduced to J.R.R. Tolkien as a teen and remain a HUGE fan. My “home” fiction genre, insofar as I have one, is SFF (science fiction and fantasy), where a number of my friends publish. So I resisted the whole “Classical” field until quite late. Latin was the most popular language at my HS (Lakeland Dreadnoughts), and had the most active student group… so of course I refused to join! Never was a follower. I took German instead. In college, I took RUSSIAN, just to be different.

My undergrad degree was a BA in English, with a concentration in creative writing and a minor in acting. My M.A. was in theology and early church history. While at the Candler School of Theology, Emory, I kept hearing about this dude, “Alexander the Great.” I had NO idea who that was. (That’s how bad my previous history education had been.) Yet as he seemed so pivotal in cultural transfer, east to west and west to east, I wandered over to the Emory library to check out a couple of bios.

By chance, they were N.G.L. Hammond’s King, Commander and Statesman, and Peter Green’s (original, Thames-on-Hudson, later re-released by U. Cal Press) Alexander of Macedon.

I literally couldn’t have picked two more different bio’s if I’d tried.

AND HE FASCINATED ME. Who was this KID, who conquered most of his known world by 32, but generated such different evaluations, positive to negative?

Like Alexander, I’m a bit inclined to … obsess?

So I kept reading, and reading, and reading (articles, not just books), and then got into Macedonia (which then in the 1980s, was mostly articles).

By the early 1990s, I’d decided I wanted to study him professionally, not just to write a novel about him, so on the urging of Judy Tarr, I called Gene Borza at Penn State. He was my #1 choice to study with (in the US) as I’d admired his honesty to reply to those who disagreed with him, not just ignore them. So Gene asked me what I’d read, and I started reciting my list, until he said, “Stop, stop! You’ve already read more than most of my current PhD students!” He encouraged me to apply.

Ergo, if my BA was in English, and my MA in Theological studies, and I’d originally intended to go on to a PhD in the latter, I sent off ONE application—to Penn State—for history.

Guess which one offered funding (e.g., a graduate assistantship).

I wound up at Penn State, studying Macedonian history with “Aristotle” (e.g, Gene Borza, whose resemblance to the philosopher is a wee bit uncanny). It was, I think, the best choice I could have made. I remain Gene’s “academic daughter,” and Book 1, Becoming, is dedicated to him due to Aristotle’s prominence, while book 2 is dedicated to my father, Ed Reames, because he’s the model for Amyntor.

So yes…there IS a backdoor for those of us determined enough. But be aware, the handicap never goes away. I face it every single day. My Latin and Greek wasn’t “good enough,” and I don’t have the extensive reading in Classics that someone with a BA in Classics would have. But I DO bring my diverse previous experience. I have a background in bereavement counselling and ER on-call duty that allows me to look at Alexander’s mourning and such events as the Philotas Affair with experience most of my colleagues (however good their Greek and Latin) don’t have.

So be prepared to justify your existence to your colleagues who had Latin in high school and pursued a BA in Classics or ancient history. Don’t apologize.

And those of you who DO have the above, remember, there are a couple of us out there, scrappy and “previously untrained” who loved the field enough to work our asses off to get a degree, and eventually, a job. So unlike some of my colleagues at Penn State, don’t snort and look down on your unusual fellows. Help them out.

I’ll also note that of the students I entered with? Only two of us received the PhD. Tim Howe, my academic brother who came with better prep, teaches today at St. Olaf’s in Minnesota. But dammit, I fought my way through. And I finished, and I’m at a uni that, with my colleagues, created an Ancient Mediterranean Studies Program at the BA/BS and MA level. I’m damn proud of that.

The field has changed since I applied to grad school in 1991, I won’t lie. Tenure-track jobs in the US, especially in ancient history and Classics, have turned into unicorns. Other countries are different.  But if you are determined enough, and damn stubborn enough, you might be able to carve your own path, as long as you keep an eye on the current state of the field. I won’t lie to anybody about how few ancient history and Classics jobs are out there on H-Net these days. BUT don’t let the afternoon-tea set make you feel less than them: “imposter’s syndrome” for pursuing a PhD in ancient history or Classics. Some of those Classics blue-bloods won’t get a job, at the end of the day.

I am THE definition of an “imposter’s syndrome” faculty member who succeeded. And I don’t give a good goddamn what anybody thinks of me. I excel at what I do, and I’m proud of it.

#classics #Classics in the back door #ancient history #stubborn ancient historians #realities of the field #asks #Jeanne Reames #ancient Macedonia #degrees in history #advanced degrees in history

[limoncitamia-blog]

HELLO EVERYONE !! My name is Alara, and i am super duper excited to be here and play honey léon for you all!! below the read is just some backstory / headcanons about honey for plotting and to just talk about ! I will also provide some potential connections for honey too soooo yeah!! just give this post a like and i will be in your inbox ready to plot!!

HONEY’S SWEET SWEET STICKY LIFE STORY !

Honey was named after the comfort food that aided her mother during her pregnancy. Especially after her father liked the idea of her daughter being as sweet as the condiment. So Honey was born with her cry being drowned by the sound of laughter from her family in the hospital room.

Honey had lived in Argentina for over 9 years, going to public elementary school there despite the immense wealth her family owned from the agriculture business they were heavily involved in. Honey’s usual days involved walking to school with her cousins, attending school from 7am to who knows when (release time was different depending on your grade), and then doing any extra curriculars before returning home at around 3pm with the delicious aroma of dinner made by her beloved uncle and father. they would enjoy their bottle of beer while the mothers both did the chores of the house or watched tv on the couch. 

Honey had always loved her education, she loved learning and she adored her projects for class and presenting things to her classmates to teach them something. 

However, at the age of 12, Honey had been sent to a private Academy in New York City for the sciences after her parents realized that she could very much prevail in life more than they could ever. They only wanted the best for her, so she spent what would have been her middle school and high school years in New York, United States as a transfer student at the Academy of Sciences. She would always travel back to Argentina for Christmas Break and Summer Break, sometimes even bring some friends from her time in New York.

It was during this time that Honey started to suffer from immense home sickness, priority change, and soon a lifestyle change she hadn’t expected. Honey is someone that has to find herself in a place she can call home, but all the travelling she did and then the occasional times she wouldn’t go back to Argentina created a sense of wandering for the young woman. she couldn’t call argentina her home anymore, and she couldn’t call new york her home either. 

Honey was conflicted for a while for what she wanted to do, since she didn’t enjoy ‘wandering’ and she very much just wanted to stay in one place for a while. when she graduated, honey took a leap year (or two) and stayed in Argentina, working to save money and rediscover her old childhood home once again in hopes it was just a case of being too far away for too long.

Honey wasn’t happy, simply because her constantly changing lifestyle had soon left her unsatisfied with Argentina or New York as her home. She relied on her grandparents a lot to guide her through life, and they had told her to travel the world and indulge in the wanderer lifestyle for a little bit. The United States and beyond seemed to be a place for her to call home, so they encouraged her to go scouting universities in the U.S. and see where she felt more at home. Soon, she ended up in san fransokyo at the walter elias university. she had spent a week there, and found that this was meant to be her home. 

Honey didn’t hesitate to apply for the closest semester she could be admitted into and she got accepted thanks to her amazing results in her entry exams and her standard tests. She lived in the dorms, before finding her own apartment and now lives happily by herself while working as a waitress / server / hostess / secretary and going to school at the same time with her best friends in the world. 

HONEY’S LITTLE TICKY TACKS !

Honey is currently studying biochemistry in uni, though she has considered expanding further in the chemistry department since it’s one of her favorite subjects. 

Honey is lowkey self-destructive but nobody quite knows it? she is very much in love with the feeling of being thrilled or excited or surprised. she absolutely loves roller coasters, she loves plane rides or helicopter rides, she likes driving fast and she loves testing her boundaries with her science experiments. it was something she could easily satisfy in argentina but in sunnyside, she has to try just a bit more to get that little high she gets a craving for.

in order to not really push herself too much and end up in a bad scenario, she also has ways to kill her energy down. exercising, studying, working, or going out dancing. honey isn’t someone that just gets down and twerks and does all that. HOWEVER, HONEY IS KNOWN FOR TURNING HEADS AT HER SPANISH CLUBS AND DANCE NIGHTS! She knows how to move her hips, flip her hair, spin and to dip to be rather enticing!

honey’s fashion taste is very chic, indulging that side of her since she isn’t ashamed of being girly and she very much doesn’t mind showing it. pumps, heels, platforms, converse are all the same to her. skirts, pants or skorts are the same to her. as long as she looks cute / hella good, she is a-okay! which doesn’t help her rather attractive self because she is ONE HOT MOM FRIEND!

Honey is someone who feels very deeply, and often seems rather sensitive. however, it just helps her be more empathetic than sympathetic for her friends. yes, it is sympathy most of the times but with the way she feels it, the way she processes the information and feels for those around her, you would think she went through it herself. it makes her rather good at knowing what to do and what to say. though, she has to learn to follow her own advice (especially since she carries some very present unresolved feelings about tadashi’s death). 

Honey is very much a DIY queen / a homemade queen. very much a mom. she likes cooking, she likes making things, she likes taking care of plants, she is just very much doing things on her own terms and not just buying things done. like IKEA is probably her favorite thing in the world. 

HONEY’S WANTED CONNECTIONS

so i’m just going to list some wanted connections / relationship labels i would absolutely love for honey! if you want to take part in it, then do shoot me a message!

Platonic Connections ; clubbing / dancing buddies, a spanish squad cx, tutor / tutee situations where honey is the tutor or where honey is being tutored in something, co-workers / club members ! i haven’t placed honey working anywhere specifically but customer service / the secretary business sounds good for her so who knows! apartment neighbors! also, exes that are on good terms? people honey finds intimidating? people who have made honey swoon? after all, she does have a type LOL!! People who honey has to be a little more patient than usual. 

Also, i would love for Honey to have some people she has gone on dates with, or people she has had a crush on, or people who have or had a crush on her! 

also, we dont even have to have these labelled connections. human relationships are so complicated, i’m sure we can come up with something!

#sunnyside:intro #ummmm so i just realized there isn't like an intro tag or anything but like take this!