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littleredwolf · 1 year

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The Sleepover

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x reader

Words: 1,740

Summary: Bucky and Y/N have been dating for a while but he is yet to spend the night at her place. After breaking down barriers and allowing himself to drop his guard, Bucky soon decides it’s finally time to take the next step.

Warnings: Mentions of Bucky’s PTSD/recovery

A/N: This was inspired by the scene in TFATWS that shows Bucky waking up on his apartment floor. It’s such a visceral moment that sheds light on just how much trauma he carries with him, and I wanted to bring some lightness to that in the form of Y/N. Long story short, I just wanted our favourite super soldier to receive the comfort he so desperately needs and deserves.

Your heart skipped a beat as you heard the unmistakable roar of Bucky’s motorcycle pulling up outside, and you launched yourself off the couch to greet him. The two of you had been dating for a little over four months now but tonight was the first time he was staying over and you were practically vibrating with excitement.

You had met a year ago when you’d been paired together on a scouting mission in Bucharest, spending an intensive four weeks trailing a suspected arms dealer. After spending the better half of a month shacked up together in a dingy apartment, it was inevitable you'd open up to one another eventually. After months of skirting around your feelings and your friends encouraging you both to speak up, the two of you had eventually plucked up the courage to confess your feelings and the rest, as the saying goes, was history.

Bucky had been a true gentleman from the very beginning and had confessed early on that he'd wanted to take things slow - it had been a long time since he'd courted a woman and thanks to his coloured past he'd all but given up on the prospect of love, so the concept of a relationship was one he still sometimes struggled to get his head around.

You understood completely and had made every effort not to overwhelm him. You were fully aware of his trauma and the suffering he'd endured and endeavoured to provide him with a calm, safe space that allowed him to let his guard down in a way he was comfortable with.

Over the last few months he'd gotten much better with touch and now it was at a point where he practically craved it. Whether he was holding your hand, laying his head in your lap while you watched TV or wrapping his arms around you from behind while you were cooking dinner, Bucky loved touch and would always find an excuse to be near you or touching you in some way. You were more than happy to indulge his needs and fussed over him at every opportunity, joking that he was like an overgrown puppy when it came to affection.

You could have cried with how sweet he’d been when he’d kissed you for the first time - he was so careful as he’d tenderly pressed his lips to yours, as though expecting to break you, and in that moment it had dawned on you that he probably wasn’t used to being so gentle towards another human being.

It was so fulfilling witnessing this once broken man rebuilding and flourishing in his new life, and you felt truly honoured that he wanted you to be a part of it.

At the sound of a knock at the door your excitement grew to an almost immeasurable amount, and you took a moment to gather yourself before answering.

You’d lost count of the amount of times you’d gone to bed alone after spending an evening with Bucky, aching for him to be beside you, and although you understood and respected his reasons for not staying you couldn’t help the sting of loneliness that crawled in whenever he left at the end of an evening.

The sight of him standing in your doorway with an overnight bag slung over his shoulder was one you’d never dared to believe you’d witness, yet here he was, casually leaning against the doorframe as he waited for you to answer the door.

“Hey Buck,” you grinned, stepping forward to greet him with a kiss which he eagerly welcomed. Wrapping his arms around you, he guided you backwards into your apartment, dropping his bag and kicking the door to a close behind him. You were breathless when he pulled away, staring up at him in awe.

“Wow, that was…just, wow,” you marvelled, completely lost for words.

“I could hear your heartbeat so I thought I’d ease some of your nerves,” he smirked, and your cheeks reddened at his confession.

“Dammit Barnes, I told you not to use your super hearing on me. What if I was in the bathroom!?”

“You think I haven’t heard you pee before?” His laughter - one of your favourite sounds - echoed around the room as you shot him a horrified glare, and he quickly pulled you into his embrace to ease your embarrassment.

“I’m reconsidering this sleepover already,” you grumbled into his chest as you wrapped your arms around his waist, breathing in his leathery scent. He chuckled and kissed the top of your head.

“Come on doll, why don't you show me where I’ll be sleeping.”

You immediately perked up at his words - which you suspected was his plan - and with a grin you grabbed his bag and led him to the bedroom to unpack.

–

The evening passed like any other - you cooked dinner, played some board games, and ended the night cuddled up on the couch with a movie - but instead of falling asleep in Bucky's arms like you usually did, you felt wide awake.

Bucky switched off the TV as you began to tidy away your empty glasses and snacks, and an awkward silence hovered over the room as you both pondered how to navigate the rest of the evening.

"So, sweetheart…what do you usually do at this point?" Bucky broke the silence as he came to lean against the counter beside you.

"Well, usually, once you've left I go to bed," you replied, realising that the suggestion of going to bed may be misinterpreted and quickly adding, "but we don't have to do that yet if you're not tired."

Bucky's hand came to rest on your arm and you looked up to find him smiling reassuringly.

"It's okay, doll. I'm happy to go to bed," he murmured, trailing his hand down to entwine his fingers with yours and leading you to your room.

You were already in your pyjamas so you slipped straight under the covers while Bucky walked round to the other side of the bed and began undressing down to his boxers. You couldn't resist a sneaky peek while his back was turned, and as soon as you gave in to your temptation you regretted it immediately - Bucky's chiselled body was truly a sight to behold and one you were sad to have to tear your eyes away from.

"Would you like me to strike a pose?" Your boyfriend's playful voice broke your train of thought and you snapped your eyes to his, finding him smirking at you with his hands on his hips.

You'd been caught red handed, and red faced! Your cheeks were blazing and you pulled the covers up to hide your face as Bucky crawled in next to you. The embarrassment quickly dissolved once he was laying next to you, your mind suddenly too preoccupied to care, and you turned to face him with a grin.

"You're here," you said gleefully, melting into his open arms.

"I'm here," he echoed, his smile mirroring yours.

With a tender kiss he pulled you closer, tucking you under his chin in a firm but gentle embrace, and soon you found the tendrils of slumber pulling you into the sleepy abyss.

–

A few hours later you were awoken by a cold breeze at your back, and you reached your hand out in the darkness, heart sinking when an empty bed greeted you.

Had Bucky left? Had he changed his mind about spending the night? Had you imagined the whole thing?

Your thoughts teetered on a downward spiral as you sat up and turned on the bedside lamp, but your insecurity quickly turned to confusion when you looked to your side and found that not only was Bucky missing from your bed, but his pillow was too.

Eyebrows knitting together, you swung your legs over the side of the bed and got up to try and solve the mystery, but you didn't get very far before your foot bumped into something solid.

Bucky.

The super soldier sat bolt upright at your touch, wide eyes staring straight ahead, and for a moment you feared he'd forgotten where he was altogether. He soon came to his senses, however, shaking off any remnants of sleep and looking up at you with a sheepish expression.

"I, uh…sometimes find it hard to sleep," he offered, fidgeting with the blanket he must have grabbed from the couch. "Sorry, I'm still kinda getting used to the idea of a comfortable bed."

He chuckled dryly and your chest tightened at his doleful expression - here was this brave, strong man who had been through hell, and he was apologising!?

That just would not do.

"Oh, Buck," you cooed, sinking to your knees in front of him and holding his face in your hands. "You don't need to apologise for anything."

His eyes met yours and you hoped he could see the love and sincerity in them. The guards he worked so hard to keep up slipped just a tiny bit, and he gave you a tearful smile as he rested his forehead against yours and closed his eyes. Kissing the top of his head, you turned and reached up to grab your pillow off the bed, setting it on the floor beside his before reaching back again for the covers.

"You don't have to do this, doll. You won't be comfortable," he protested once he realised you were intending to join him, but you simply waved a hand to quiet him.

"We're in this together now baby," you softly reassured, adjusting the blanket so it covered the both of you. "I'm right here with you every step of the way."

You kissed him deeply and he wrapped his arms around you, pulling you down with him as he laid back on the hardwood floor. By no means was it comfortable and you knew in the morning your back would be aching, but none of that mattered while you were at Bucky's side.

He'd been fighting his demons for so long, and he'd likely be fighting them for a long time to come, but there was no way you were going to let him continue fighting them alone.

Tucked tightly into Bucky's side, your head on his chest and the sound of his heart beating in your ears, you fell back to sleep with surprising ease, and neither you, nor Bucky, woke again until morning.

#bucky barnes #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes x you #bucky fluff #bucky imagine #james buchanan barnes #bucky x reader #james bucky barnes #marvel cinematic universe #mcu #the falcon and the winter soldier #tfatws #winter soldier #avengers #sebastian stan #ptsd #trauma

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lokiswifeduh · 1 month

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Long Night

Pairings - Roommate!tfatws!Bucky x Fem!Roommate!Reader

Summary - You've been stood up twice in a row now. Bucky is tired of seeing you disappointed. So he takes you on a date.

Warnings - angst, being stood up, angry/annoyed bucky

Notes - I'm horrible at summaries, I know!! This happened to me a couple days ago, wishing I had a Bucky to take me on a date in Brooklyn right about now! Not proofread so lmk if there are any mistakes! Thank you for reading loves!!

WC - 1,750

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"Whatcha gettin' ready for, doll?" Bucky leaned on your bedroom doorframe, watching you straighten your hair in the mirror on top of your dresser.

"I have a date." You smiled, not noticing the slight drop in Bucky's smile.

"Oh, with anyone I know?"

You shook your head. "His name's Nash. Someone Sam set me up with," You explained. "He's supposed to pick me up in twenty minutes."

Bucky internally rolled his eyes. The guys Sam hung around with were nice, yes. However, he never got the guts to take you out on the date you deserved. A date with him.

"Are you sure you want him picking you up?" Bucky asked, making you look back in confusion. "I mean you don't know him that well... You could meet him there or uh, I'll drop you off." You let out a small laugh, "Yeah Buck, I'll just have my male roommate drop me off at a date, that'll go over well."

Bucky shrugged. He walked away from your bedroom to grab a beer from the fridge before sitting on the couch. He turned on whatever channel didn't require him to use the remote too much before slouching into the cushions.

Twenty minutes passed by when you slipped out of your bedroom, shutting the door behind you.

"Wow, doll. You.." Bucky's eyes widened slightly, "You look great."

You grinned, looking down at your outfit. It was basic but it was the most comfortable yet fashionable outfit you had. Black flared leggings with a sage green sweater and some white sneakers. It was simple yet appropriate for a late-night-diner date.

And to top it all off your makeup had cooperated for once. Both eyebrows looked like twins and not sisters. Your highlight was perfect, shimmering, but not too much. And you had the perfect lipgloss that made your lips look sunkissed. Perfect.

"He should be here any minute!" You sprayed some perfume, your favorite vanilla scent, and went to sit in the armchair across from the couch.

Bucky hummed, keeping his eyes on the Tv, taking another sip of beer.

However, twenty more minutes went by and Nash hadn't texted you, hadn't called, and hadn't shown up. Bucky was starting to feel bad and you could tell by the pity looks he kept throwing your way.

"He uhm," Bucky cleared his throat, "Maybe he hit traffic. You know, with it being New York and everything." You nodded, trying to hold onto at least a small bit of hope. "Yeah, traffic." But then another forty minutes went by and he still hadn't even texted.

And then another hour.

And another hour.

By the time Bucky finally turned off the Tv it was three and a half hours since the time Nash was supposed to come pick you up.

You were still sitting in the armchair, having dozed off with a couple tears streaked down your face. Ruining your once-perfect makeup.

Bucky sighed, silently cursing Sam even though he knew it wasn't his fault.

"Alright, doll," Bucky whispered, placing his metal arm behind your back, and lifting your legs with his right. You groaned awake, holding your phone in your palm as you wiped your cheek. "What time is it?" Your eyes shoot open, "Did he show up?" Bucky placed you in your bed, handing you one of his t-shirts you had stolen a while ago. "No, doll. I'm sorry." You stripped your shirt off to change as Bucky went into your bathroom, grabbing a couple of makeup wipes.

"Here." He softly spoke, hating your distraught and disappointed expression.

You wiped your makeup off, shedding a couple more tears in the process. The tears dripped from your cheek to the grey henley Bucky had given you. "It's okay. Maybe he was just busy." Bucky wanted to roll his eyes. He wanted to tell you that any respectful man, any gentleman wouldn't have done what Nash did to you. But he kept his mouth shut, opting to hum in your favor, and threw the makeup wipes in the trash when your face was completely bare.

"Goodnight, Doll." He placed a kiss on the crown of your head as you hummed in response. "Goodnight, Buck."

---

A couple days later, you finally got a text back from Nash.

"Bucky I was right!!" You came sliding into the kitchen, your socks making it easy to ice-skate on the smooth wood floor.

Bucky chuckled at your ability to skid so gracefully without falling. He had tried it once but vowed to never do it again after he slid into the dining room table. You would never let him live it down.

"Right about what, doll?" Bucky flipped the pancake, adding some vanilla to the dough.

"About Nash! He actually was busy!" Bucky quirked an eyebrow. Wondering why he had waited this long to text you back. Six days to be exact. "Did he say with what?" Bucky turned back to making breakfast.

"He said he got busy with work, and that something at work pissed him off so he didn't wanna see me while he was upset." You explained what Nash had told you.

Bucky had never wanted to hit someone in the face so hard.

Well, actually that wasn't true. But he did want to sock Nash in the face for standing you up and giving you a half-ass excuse days later.

"I mean that explains things, yeah..." Your brows furrowed at Bucky's flat tone. "Do you not believe it?" Bucky sighed, pulling the milk and eggs from the fridge as you sat on the countertop. "It's not that I don't believe it, it's just that it kinda seems like he forgot and or didn't wanna see you so he made up an excuse a little less than a week later to not seem like a dick." You nodded, taking in the information. Bucky couldn't sense your reaction quite yet, seeing how you were just staring at the ground with your hands in your lap, swinging your legs in the air.

"I mean, I'm seeing him tonight. If everything goes well after then I'll know it really was true."

"You're seeing him again?" You nod, "But this time I'm meeting him at the fourth corner Bakery. And I'm meeting him earlier this time, around noon."

Bucky looked over at the clock, seeing it was already 10:45. "Well you better go get ready," He said almost reluctantly, "Breakfast will be done before you need to leave."

You smiled, hopping off the countertop as you gave Bucky a quick kiss on the cheek. "Thanks, Buck. You're the best!"

He smiled, but then remembered he's only making you breakfast before you go on a date with a guy who's already stood you up once. Rolling his eyes, he scrambled the eyes, listening to your music in the other room.

---

You had already left for your date three hours ago when Bucky decided to go over to see Sam. His excuse was wanting to discuss the next mission they were due to go on in a week. But he just didn't want to sit at home all day, thinking about how you were on a date with another guy.

However, before he could reach Sam's he had to pass by the bakery where you were meeting Nash.

Yet when he looked through the window, there you were, sitting all alone at a table for two, eating a piece of cheesecake. No Nash in sight.

An internal war started in Bucky's mind. Should he go in and see if you were okay? Or should he believe Nash was in the bathroom and you were just sitting by yourself for a minute or two?

But then he noticed the solemn look on your face. The way your fork poked at the half-eaten cake. And that was your favorite kind. Bucky mumbled a soft curse, opening the door to the bakery and making his way over to you.

Without words, he sat down, his gloved hand resting on the table in front of your plate. You kept your head down, not quite looking at Bucky but knowing he was there.

"He didn't show, again." You mumbled. If Bucky didn't have super soldier hearing he doubted he could've heard what you had said.

"I know, doll. I'm sorry." You finally looked up, tears in your eyes which made Bucky's heart clench. "Why me, Buck? Why am I the one who's alone?" Bucky stayed silent, knowing you needed to vent.

"Am I unlovable? Is that what it is? Why does every single one of my friends get to find the one? Get to fall in love, get married, and have kids and I'm the one without someone?!" Your outburst made some other customers look over in concern.

You groaned, resting your head on your hand and hiding your face from the rest of the bakery. "I- uh, I'm not sure, doll. But I know one thing.. you're not unlovable. You just haven't found the one who wants to take the effort to show you how effortless you are to love."

You looked up at Bucky, fresh tears gleaming in your eyes. You had never seen him look so vulnerable before. He usually grumped his way through emotions. But not with you, not anymore.

He gave you a sad smile, clearing his throat before he stood, "Y'know what, doll. Let's go." He held out his hand. You looked around, "Where are we going?" Bucky took your palm in his gloved hand, "It's a surprise." You laughed, before standing and throwing the rest of your soggy cheesecake away. "You know how I feel about surprises." "Okay, I'll give you a hint." Bucky opened the door for you, making sure to walk on the side of the road with the bustling cars and traffic. Bucky called a taxi, opening the door for you. "You're about to have the best date of your life." You stared at him in awe before laughing and climbing in the taxi. Bucky's knees barely fit as he scooted in next to you. The driver asked where to go as Bucky licked his lips, "Brooklyn, please." You smiled, "Brooklyn?"

Bucky nodded, throwing an arm around your shoulder. "I may be old but I still know some good spots to take my best girl on a date." A blush rose to your cheeks as you looked over to him. "Your best girl?" Bucky nodded, picking up your hand with his metal one before leaving a soft kiss on your knuckles. "Always and forever, doll."

---

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eunoiaastralwings · 5 months

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Your Baby’s Weird but Amusing Obsession

featuring bucky x wife!reader with their son

fandom mcu- tfatws era ?

a/n dont ask me why i just did - it was too cute not to writ. reader is lowkey my oc - am sorry. . . and btw - you can NOT unconvince me Bucky will not name his son after himself - personal headcanon you can not undo that for me - HE SO WANTS HIS JAMES JR XD

warnings just fluff. just before you read just know am dyslexic

You were playing mat with yours and Bucky’s 2-month baby boy as Bucky came in.

His son immediately looks up at Bucky and chortles a few giggles – seeing his dad and 2-month-old baby holds up his tiny arms at Bucky.

Bucky’s face brightens up when he sees them – and his bright blue eyes soften.

He walks forward and kneels on one knee next to the play mat and carefully picks him up and places him in his arms – before leaning back against the couch while the 3 of them sat on the play mat.

You smile – your heart melting at the exchange.

They had named their son James Steven Barnes, after Bucky’s first name of James and of course Steve, or Cap’s name for his middle name– but you took the liberty of nicknaming your son Jay – while you were at it.

You laugh as just as immediately Bucky had picked up their son, his toothless gums were instantly on Bucky’s vibranium arm.

Jay had a strange obsession with his dad’s metal arm – for some reason or the other he just loved it.

Bucky glances at you – but since you offered no assistance – his eyes then drift back to his son chewing on his arm, brow furrowed in contemplation.

Jay chortles a few giggles at his dad – his saliva dripping having left a slobbery grip on his dad’s arm. You couldn't help but throw you head back and laugh.

Bucky looks a tad bit annoyed and tries to pry the baby off his vibranium arm.

“That's not food, son. It’s metal.”

He says.

You couldn’t help but snicker at the sight.

Bucky sighed and tries to pry off his baby’s slobbery grip – giving you a little scowl.

“Jay, c’mere. Let daddy have his arm back.”

Bucky says – as he tried and cooed a little to Jay.

Jay only chortles a few giggles – his bright blue eyes looking up at his dad as if he as content in this manner.

You couldn't help but snicker again as Jay refused to let go – the kid was too strong.

This happened every time, Bucky picked him up.

“Give me my arm back, Jay.”

Bucky says – this time, his tone of voice was a little sterner – but low not wanting to scare his baby, of course.

The baby only giggles and chortles – but still doesn’t let go.

“You’re son’s so weird!"

You giggled – now finally leaning to help get your 2-month son’s toothless gums off your husband’s metal arm – but Jay continued to leave a slobbery grip on his dad’s vibranium arm.

Bucky chuckles – despite his annoyance.

“He got that from his mother.”

He teases.

He then reaches down and attempts to pry Jay off his metal arm again.

You raised an eyebrow taking your hands away.

“Do you want my help or not?”

You smirked.

Bucky shakes his head – smiling.

“No, I’ve got this.”

He then tries again to pry your son off his arm – but still fails.

“Ok!”

You shrugged leaning back to watch as your 2-month son continued to leave his slobbery grip his dad’s metal arm.

“Jay, c’mon. Give back daddy’s arm.”

Bucky asks – sounding a little frustrated now.

“Jay, be nice.”

Bucky says.

The baby still doesn’t let go of his dad’s arm.

“C’mon, Jay.”

He says - trying once again to pry him off.

After a minute – you amusedly shakes your head.

“Hey, my baby, come here!”

You cooed softly holding out your hands to your little son – as you puckered your lips to kiss his cheek as you gently picked up your 2-month baby off Bucky.

Bucky laughs – watching the scene, shaking his head as he wipes off Jay’s saliva off his metal arm with a tissue.

“So, the kid will give me a hard time but listen to you?”

He puts his arm on your shoulder.

You smirked.

“I’m the favorite!”

You say – blowing raspberry kisses on Jay’s cheek.

The baby giggles and blows raspberries back.

“Yeah, I guess you are. Can’t blame the kid, though. You’re pretty great.”

Bucky says – smiling at his wife.

Once again – he puts his arm on your shoulder, hugging you to his side.

You giggled and cooed your little 2-month baby.

“Mama’s the best!”

You say.

Your baby stares at you for a moment – then chortles and giggles, blowing more raspberries at you.

“See?”

You smirk – turning to your husband.

"Yeah, I get it.”

Bucky sighs, rolling his eyes and chuckles

Jay blows more raspberries at you – and you respond by blowing more raspberries at him.

Bucky laughs.

“You two are adorable.”

He says – watching his little family.

@winterarmyy-too - if you're interested <3

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urdepressedslut · 1 year

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I Get Scared Too

♡ Pairing: tfatws!Bucky Barnes x Fem!Reader

♡ Summary: You have a close call during a mission, and back at the compound Bucky seems to be distant and cold towards you.

♡ Warnings: angst, fluff, reader injury, mentions of gunfire, hints to anxiety attack

A/N: this idea was from a dream i had (im a lucid dreamer). i have been writing in a dream journal since elementary school, so you can imagine the dreams i have jotted down 😭

The mission hadn’t gone to plan, shocker, but everyone kept all their limbs and were able to walk back to the quinjet.

You had a close call, you didn’t see the previously passed out agent sitting back up raising his gun to your back. Obviously before he could fire somewhere vital, Natasha had taken him down, faltering his aim. Although the bullet had skimmed you deep on your hip.

It was hardly life threatening, but Natasha being a protective best friend, scolded you for being reckless. You knew her intentions were good, and that she cared about you, but it didn’t stop you from being annoyed at her treating you like a kid.

She eventually walked to the other side of the quinjet, leaving you to your thoughts. You thought you had done really well, taking down twice as many enemies than last time. But of course, everyone always focused on your flaws, what you had done wrong.

When the quinjet finally landed back at the compound, you were the first one out, having a slight limp from the discomfort in your hip. But otherwise didn’t mind it, you wanted to find your favorite person and tell them all about the mission.

“FRIDAY, where’s Bucky?” You called out to the air once you were inside.

“Bucky is currently in his room, Miss (Y/n).” She announced, making you smile in excitement.

The mission had only been a three day trip, but you had missed him the second you stepped on the quinjet.

Arriving at his door, you knocked three times, hearing shuffling from inside. The door swung open to reveal an unhappy looking Bucky, causing your smile to waver. Assuming he was just having a bad day, you smiled wider and stepped forward to hug him.

“Hi Buck, I missed you.” You mumbled into his chest, squeezing him tighter when you didn’t feel him hug back.

His body tensed, and immediately you released him and stepped back. You were confused at what was wrong, his face was cold. You were hurt that he hadn’t hugged you back, wondering if you had done something to make him mad.

“Missed ya too um... You should go (Y/n).” He spoke finally, his voice holding annoyance.

You blinked up at him and shook your head, fully confused now.

“Buck wha— what’s going on?” You asked hesitantly, anxious that Bucky was being so short with you so suddenly and you didn’t know why.

“Nothing, I just wanna be alone.” He told you, and your heart broke for two reasons.

One, the thought of Bucky having an episode and you weren’t here for him made your heart hurt.

And two, he always came to you when he was upset and the fact that he didn’t want you with him… It stung.

You stared at him as your eyes started to water, your bottom lip starting to quiver. Your heart ached, but you wanted to respect his need for space. You didn’t know what else to say, and considering the lump forming in your throat, you decided to keep it short.

“Alright yeah, of course. I’ll… See you at dinner then.” You told him, watching him retreat back into his room and slam the door, making you flinch.

You were frozen in place, staring at the door expecting him to come back out and tell you it was all a prank. But several minutes passed and you were still staring at the door.

_____________________

You pushed the food around on your plate, keeping your eyes casted down. You had tried to get Bucky's attention, ever since you watched with glossy eyes as he passed his usual seat next to you, and instead sat at the other end of the table. He was avoiding your direction and never attempted to make eye contact.

Bucky giving you the cold shoulder, being silent with you was extremely painful. Considering how well you two communicated and talked, you were the one who had brought him out of his shell. It hurt so bad your chest ached physically.

Out of nowhere, you were slamming your fork down on the plate with a loud clank, causing everyones attention to snap to you.

"What's the matter with you cupcake?" Tony asked you, taking a sip from his wine glass.

Feeling embarrassed from everyones stares, you snuck a glance at Bucky at the end of the table, surprised when you met his concerned eyes.

You scoffed, shaking your head in bewilderment. He had no right to act concerned, after ignoring you. You almost felt bad for him, thinking he was having a bad day, but after you watched him chatter playfully at dinner with everyone, you realized it was only you he didn't want to speak to.

"Hello? Earth to (Y/n)!?" Tony announced, banging on the table to get your attention when he noticed you spacing out.

Everyone was concerned about you by now, all watching you carefully. You glared at Bucky and stood up without answering Tony, pushing your chair back and quickly exiting the dining room.

"Must be her time of the month." Tony mumbled, earning a slap to the back of the head from the redhead next to him. "Ow... What?!"

"Shut up Tony." Natasha rolled her eyes, turning to Bucky and giving him a 'What did you do' look.

_____________________

Laying in bed on your side, you pulled the blanket tighter to your chest with a sniffle. You began to turn over on your other side when your hip throbbed painfully at the movement. The waves of pain had your body shuttering, your eyes filling with fresh tears, rolling down your flushed cheeks.

You blamed your tears on your hip pain, but all the emotions you’d piled up since you’d gotten back from the mission was weighing on you now.

Light knocks sounded from your door, causing you to tense up and turn your back to the door. You didn’t feel like talking to anyone, especially if it was him.

“(Y/n)? I know you heard me.” Natasha muttered, opening the door, letting herself in.

“What do you want Nat?” You snapped, not meaning to take out your frustrations on her.

“You wanna tell me what’s going on? Your little scene downstairs has everyone worried.” She told you, earning a scoff from you, still refusing to face her.

“It’s nothing.” You sighed, wishing she could leave so you could attempt to sleep your issues away.

“Didn’t seem like nothing.” She retorted, huffing in annoyance when you stayed silent.

You were staring at the wall, biting your lip, trying to hold in your built up emotions. Too busy to notice Natasha whispering to another person entering the room. It was when you felt the edge of the bed behind you dip down that snapped your attention back.

“Hey doll,” Bucky greeted, “How’s your hip?”

You twisted your body back facing his worried form, but your eyebrows were furrowed on how he even knew about your injury.

“How did you…”

“Nat told me.”

Rolling your eyes, you were cursing under your breath. Throwing the blanket over your head in attempt to hide.

Your blanket cocoon was quickly ripped away by Bucky, pulling the blanket all the way down below your knees. His eyes dancing around your bandaged hip, clenching his jaw at the red seeping through the white gauze.

“(Y/n), is your hip feeling okay? Do we need to change it—“

“I’m fine!” You snapped, “Now go away.”

You we’re looking everywhere but his eyes, knowing you’d break down if you saw the disappointment in them.

Bucky was taken a back, but he couldn’t be all that angry when he’d brought all this on himself. He just got into this weird headspace when he’d heard the mission report, hearing that you’d been hurt. He realized it wasn’t fatal, but he didn’t like seeing his girl hurt at all. He realized he took it a little too far, he didn’t mean to make you upset the way he did. He’d shut you out and he felt like his old self when he’d first arrived at the compound again. Anxious and closed off, pushing you away when he really wanted to pull you into his arms and tell you how much he loves you.

“Doll, talk to me.” He practically begged, his metal arm whirring, having to stop himself from reaching out to touch you.

“Why are you ignoring me?” You rushed out, your voice louder than you intended it to be, “Is it because I messed up on the mission? A-are you disappointed in me or something? Huh?”

Your chest was rising and falling in a fast rhythm, your mind going haywire at the possibilities of why Bucky was suddenly indifferent with you. Your throat felt like it was tightening up.

Bucky stayed silent, his heart hurting, feeling terrible for making you feel this way.

You couldn’t stop your mind from producing the awful thoughts, and like a switch had been flipped, the dam inside of you cracked. The tears wouldn’t stop, your sobs painful sounding

“Is it… Is it because you— I— Do you not love m-me anymore?” You wheezed out.

Bucky snapped out of his silent trance, his hands cupping your face, brushing away the tear streaks.

“Baby no…” He hushed, trying to stop your mind from torturing yourself.

“I’m so sorry Buck, I-I love you so much and I…” You hiccuped, “If I did something— If I’m not good enough—“

“No Doll hey… Stop that,” He cooed, “You haven’t done anything wrong, okay?”

“Bu-but you…”

“I know baby, I’ve been a dick. I shouldn’t of shut you out like that I was just… I was scared.” Bucky confessed, your tears and breathing slowing down, you sitting silent besides the occasional hiccup.

“I still… I don’t understand?” You thought out loud.

Bucky breathed heavily, swallowing the forming lump in his throat. He scooted closer to you, pulling your form closer to him, and you let him.

“(Y/n), you have no idea how scared I was when I heard you had gotten hurt.” He started, watching your face soften at his wavering voice.

“Buck, I’m okay though.” You reassured him, grabbing his palms, rubbing your thumb comfortingly over the back of his hand.

“I know baby, but… I couldn’t help but think if you got hurt on a mission and—“ He panted out, “And you didn’t make it.”

Your heart ached at the pain laced in his words, him holding onto your hands in a desperate grip.

“Buck..”

“I know that doesn’t give me an excuse to be a dick to you I… I just get into this headspace every time you are headed back from a mission, when I’m waiting to hear that you’re alright and… When I heard you had gotten hurt— I just assumed the worst.” He finished.

The disappointment was clear on his face, but it wasn’t directed toward you, it was directed to himself.

You understood that he meant no harm, and you felt incredibly bad that he suffered so much while you were gone, you thought it was the other way around. You felt extremely loved in a sense, feeling lucky enough to have someone worry as deep as he did for you.

“Buck, you should’ve just told me how you were feeling from the start. You know I’d listen,” You paused, doubt clouding your thoughts, “You still trust me enough to talk to me… Right?”

Bucky immediately nodded his head, cupping your face, hearing your faltering voice.

“Of course I do baby, I trust you with my life.” He reassured you, “I don’t know why I got like that.”

“I know why,” You started, cradling his face, watching him snuggle his cheek deeper into your palm, “You have a good heart, and sometimes having a good heart can be overwhelming, because you can care so much about something.”

“I don’t want a good heart if it’s going to make me act that way.” He whispered sadly, lowering his eyes.

“That’s the thing about having a good heart,” You lifted his head slightly so his eyes met yours, “Its not something you can just change, it’s a part of you.”

He gazed from each eye, to your lips, then back up to your eyes, mesmerized by your beauty and soul. How could you be so forgiving and caring towards him?

“I’m so sorry I shut you out (Y/n), I love you and I will never do something like that again.” He promised, lifting and pulling you into his lap, curling his arms around your frame. Sitting his chin on top of your head.

You snuggled your face into his neck, wrapping your arms around him protectively.

“It’s okay Buck, I get scared too.”

#reader insert #light angst #fluff #oneshot #imagine #bucky x female reader #buckybarnes #bucky x y/n #falcon and the winter soldier #tfatws #marvel cinematic universe #sebastian stan characters #hurt/comfort #protective bucky barnes

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winterarmyy · 8 months

Text

Promise Me | Part III

When he was sent out for war, Bucky made a promise to his lover that might just last through several lifetimes.

Navigation: Part I | Part II | Part III (end)

Words: 4.2k++

Pairing: 40s!bucky / eventually tfatws!bucky x female!reader

Warnings: angst but happy ending. The anticipation, the hesitation, yup it was real in this one. Not enough dialogue in my opinion but meh my brain was not braining. Bucky's scene before their official reunion.

P/S: Yeay, it's a wrap. Sorry for the delay guys. I'm still sick but feeling better, so that's a good news! This is the final part if the mini series, I hope you enjoy!

Read my other works here: Masterlist

Louisiana, 2024 – New beginning

War after war, from one fight into another, Bucky finally had the chance to catch a breath for himself. With the flagsmashers gone and Sam being the new Captain America just as Steve envisioned, there was a moment of peace for Bucky's tortured soul to finally rest.

He sat at the deck area of Sam's ship, watching the sun meets the ocean over the horizon, occasionally sipping on his probably fifth bottle of beer.

When he drowned himself in the memories of the events that happened these past few months, suddenly the tranquil of the sunset ahead of him doesn't interest him the least; not when a certain person had been occupying his mind.

Replaying all the twists and turns of his journey fighting those rogue group of super soldiers, one person had been but remained a mystery to him.

The Deathstalker.

It was the one puzzle piece that didn't seemed fit in the picture. As if she was plucked out entirely from a different story, a riddle that would lead him into another adventure beyond the unknown.

He still remembered the way her hands trembled against his face, tears pooling in her eyes that then fell into her mask as she muttered his name again and again.

Bucky gulped as his eyes loomed over hers, "Who are you?"

The Deathstalker seemed to be taken aback by his question. Her mutterings stopped and her eyes locked on his blue ones; there was hesitation in her gaze, or a contemplation of an answer that Bucky was dying to know.

"I-- i'm--" her words stumbled as her feet dragged backwards, putting some space between herself and Bucky.

Bucky's heart stammered in anticipation, he had a gut feeling that she wasn't just someone that he had crossed path with once or twice. He could tell they had some kind of a long history, a deeper connection; Where? When? He wasn't sure. He just knew it that there was something special between them, especially when she looked at him with such eyes.

But before she could give a definite answer, multiple groups of bounty hunters started to re-gather in their area. Zemo came in clutch with a car, picking up the injured Sam with the help of Sharon.

Bucky can hear Sharon's voice yelling out his name yet he didn't move an inch and within minutes they were surrounded by the hunters.

What was it that gave him such courage to court death just to hear her answer? Was it just purely out of curiosity or was it some kind of delusional hope that intrigued his soul?

Y/N looked around to assess their dire situation before gazing up at the taller. She knew this wasn't the best time for the truth and her hesitation only makes it worst.

But when, Bucky held out his hand towards her, "Come with me." there was a strong pull that made her wanted to just give in and take his hand.

And Bucky didn't know why he reached out for her, but it felt right. She glanced in between his hand and his pleading eyes, her own hand twitching, almost submitting to her desire but the last minute she decided to stand on her ground.

Y/N ended up turning her back and fled away, leaving her lover's hand hanging and his question unanswered.

Through the time that Bucky was deep in his memories, he may or may not have unintentionally bored his gaze towards Sarah's direction, which only triggered Sam into a protective brother that he is, "Don't flirt with my sister." He warned.

Bucky briefly scoffed and denied his accusations, "I'm not." He sipped on his bottle as he averted his gaze away.

The look on Sam's face seemed like he was trying to glare into Bucky's soul; he was sceptical with the his deflection. But the brunette only rolled his eyes in response as he spoke, "Seriously. I'm not interested." He continued before Sam couldn't interject, "Not that there's anything wrong with her.. it's just..."

Seeing Bucky's struggles to find an excuse, Sam curiously quirked, "It's just that you already have a girl in mind?" He suggested.

There was a hint of softness in Bucky's smile when he ran his thumb across the glossy sticker of the bottle, "I had a girl." He spoke dearly as his eyes diluted into another spiral of scattered memories of his past lover, "I had the best girl."

Since the truth that was unfolded in Madripoor, Y/N had been keeping tabs on Bucky. At first, she couldn't believe it. She had to put everything about the super soldier serum on hold, to uncover more of Bucky's survival.

As it turn out, he managed to survive the fall from the train back in 1945 and had been brainwashed into a lethal weapon for Hydra for years after that.

His identity had been a secret for decades but since the fall of Hydra a few years back, the whole world knew who the Winter Soldier was. However, the people in the underground world was much fond of his villain's name, rather than the name of a war hero when it comes to addressing him.

Therefore, the lack of use of his real name had been one of the reason why Y/N was not aware of his existence. Not to mention, when he made his first public appearance when the bombing at Washington D.C. happened, she was determined to leave anything related to her past life behind and was trying to live a new life away in Singapore.

Then, a few years after that, when she came back to New York during the first year of the blip, Bucky was unfortunately, one of the people who vanished.

But, those things doesn't matter anymore now that she knew he was alive. Her Bucky. Her James. He's alive. Y/N couldn't remember the last time she was this happy, this overjoyed. That night, she couldn't sleep very well; not when her heart was working overtime all through the night.

Ever since then, she had been lurking around Bucky and Sam most of the time. Besides, her own mission of making sure the super soldier serum doesn't fall into the wrong hands and to put an end to the flagsmasher, Y/N was also there just to see Bucky.

She couldn't help it.

Imagine living a somewhat immortal life without a piece of your heart for decades. Withering to the fact that you can never see your lover, not in life nor in death; Or spending days and nights, missing and longing for his soul to be one with yours again.

And then suddenly discovering he was still alive.

Of course, she would use any excuse to see him every single day without fail. But at the same time, she didn't want to make things more complicated than it already was. With the crisis of the vigilante super soldiers, she didn't think it would be wise to reveal herself to Bucky anytime soon.

So, she stayed in the shadows instead, refuse to make herself known to Bucky. Whether as the Deathstalker or as Y/N.

Except for that one time that she decided to help him.

Bucky looked around the parking lot, trying to make a decision on which vehicle would be easiest for him to hijack. That was when he heard her signature robotic voice, "Hey, sarge!" She yelled.

He followed her voice upwards to see her feet dangling in the air, as she sat on the edge of the metal of the fire escape stairs. He hadn't seen her since their first encounter at Madripoor, "You..." Bucky whispered quietly.

Now that he thought about it, did she just call him by his title?

She titled her head to the side, "Do you require any assistance, sargent?" She asked nonchalantly as if they have been buddies for years.

Yup, she did used his title.

Bucky's signature frown only deepened when she insinuated a jest-like tone. He wasn't sure whether she was trying to appear friendly in order to help him or slow him down. So be safe, his defence went up when he straighten his back into a stance.

When Y/N saw how his guard changed, she decided to get straight to the point, "I didn't come all the way here to fight with you, James" she leaned as if it'll close the distance between them.

She wondered if her words trigger a memory in him; after all, she did use the similar sentence in 1943 when Steve rescued him from Hydra's captivity. But the lack of response from Bucky told her otherwise. Perhaps, it was too long of past for him to remember, or it wasn't significant enough for him.

Bucky's brows quirked when she yelled, "Heads up." and his hand rose up to catch whatever it was she threw down at him.

Y/N briefly titled her head forward as she spoke, "Far left. The black bike." In which Bucky briefly followed her directions, to indeed see a black bike parked at the spot.

Bucky wordlessly turned his head back and gaze up at her with a questioning look on his face. He couldn't see her behind that mask she was wearing but if he could, he would've see her smiling, "You need it more than I do."

It has been a few months since that night. And she was still lurking somewhere in the dark. Everywhere he goes, she will be right around the corner; watching, observing.

Even now, when she found herself standing on one of the boardwalk in Louisiana, near where Sam's boat resides. There was no denying that she was sort of being a creep, basically stalking Bucky from where she was standing.

From this distance, she could see that Bucky was having the time of his life entertaining the kids with his left arm; or maybe the kids were, when they compete each other on how long they can last hanging from the vibranium metal.

Y/N just had to smile seeing him happy like this. Her heart bloomed with warmth that she never thought she would ever had the chance feel again. Bucky looked as if he was finally at peace, and that made her doubt if it was a good idea to insert herself in his life now.

She believed that he derserve a happy ending. After all he had gone through all those years, he should be able to have the luxury of having a completely new life, a new beginning. Away from the past that are just filled with painful memories and dreadful suffering. To find love again and live a long happy life where she is nothing but a distant memory.

He deserve that.

But is that what she truly wanted?

Brooklyn, 2024 – Truth Untold

"That'll be $25, sir." The red-haired smiled as she handed Bucky his usual order. He paid accordingly as he took it off her hands and walked out of the cozy little shop at the corner of the busy city street.

His gloved hand gripped onto the stem of the bouquet, as his dark and tall silhouette slithered through the crowd. Everybody seemed to be entranced with whatever it was on the screen of their phones, while Bucky felt like he was out of place and time with arrangement of primroses in his hands.

The hustle bustle of the city slowly transitioned into a much calmer and quieter scenary. He walked passed the rusty, almost deteriorating entrance gate, nodding to the old ground keeper as he passed by. He knew he could get lost if he doesn't keep his focus, yet his eyes remained on the petals of the flowers, gambling his trust in his feet to bring him to the only spot they recognized.

"Hey, doll." Bucky greeted, gripping on the stem a little tighter as he read the name of his lover on the worn-looking headstone. Months of cleaning and tending her grave, it still looked grey and sombre compared to when he first visited; but that tends to happen to a grave is been left out since the 70's.

He lowered into a crouching position and placed the flowers in front of the headstone, "I'm sorry I've been missing some weeks on ya. Duty calls." Bucky knew that wasn't a good excuse to miss their dates but the flagsmashers events had caused him to skip this little Tuesday routine of his.

As depressing it might sound, he missed coming here.

Besides going to therapy, this has been the only place where Bucky talks the most about his feelings. Though it might be completely a one-sided conversation, but he could spend hours talking to her. Telling her anything and everything that's been going on in that pretty head of his. No matter how scrambled and messy it was up there.

Bucky traced his fingers to the words engraved in the stone; it read 'Beloved daughter, sister, aunt, and friend.' Each title were delightful as they were but then again, she could've been 'a lovely wife' and 'a great mother', but she didn't.

"Why didn't you?" Bucky whispered quietly. "I just know that men must've been thrilled chasing after you, begging on their knees for your hand." He chuckled as he remembered all those times when his friends would ogle over her whenever he brought her out for a dance, "And you'd be a wonderful mother too." Knowing her gentle nature and how the kids in the hospital adored her, he just knew she would be.

His heart pierced painfully to think that she might have grown old alone, and died without family of her own. "You should've live a happy life, y/n. Marry a good man, build a family." Tears that pooled started to drip from the corner of his eyes, each tore an aching sob from his throat, "And I wished I could've be there with you."

It wasn't rare for Bucky to cry during his visits to Y/N's grave. He is the most vulnerable when he's with her; even in death, being around her has been comforting for his soul.

Y/N could clearly hear the sound of his sniffles when she stood closer to him like this. She spend day after day, gathering the courage and figuring out what to say if she ever confronted Bucky.

But in the end, the fact that Bucky was just within her reach, living, breathing; it broke whatever plan she had in her mind.

It still felt like a dream. A lucid one.

Bucky knew that was someone standing behind him; but he felt no sorts of vendetta from the person and if they mean him any harm, they would've done it sooner. He roughly stroke his palm across his face in effort to hide the tears streaks away and took a deep breath as he stood on his feet.

Whoever he had in mind, well it was definitely not that person who was standing behind him right now. It totally caught him off guard when he saw the Deathstalker standing in front of him instead of any other familiar faces.

Though her identity was still hidden, but instead of her combat attire, she was in a much comfortable clothes. Casual sneakers, basic jeans, an oversize sweater, its hood pulled over her head and a soft cloth mask covering her lower face.

Despite the change of style, her eyes were still the same. Big, brown and Bucky could only describe them to be filled with curiosity and concern as they looked up at him. He could feel the burn from the drag of her gaze on each part of his features; the softness of his lips, the red of his nose and especially the puffiness of his eyes.

He broke the silence when he started the conversation, "I assume that you're not going to fight me." He said, "At least you don't look like you're equipped for it..." Bucky pointed out the obvious.

Y/N took a few seconds of silent blinking before she responded with a shook of her head.

The lack of verbal response somehow caused him to feel slightly awkward. Rubbing the back on his neck, Bucky titled his head to the side, "So... you're here for your bike?" He asked. He still hold on to the bike that she lend to him, though it was back at his place, if that's what she wanted.

Her eyes curved into a pair of cresent moons, a side effect of a smile that Bucky couldn't see. She shook her head again to deny his speculation.

Bucky pointed out at the graveyard around them when he asked, "Uhh...are you here for a visit too?" He doubt it but it was worth to try.

Y/N looked over his shoulder, reading the familiar name engraved on the headstone behind him, before locking her eyes back to his. She shook her head yet again.

Bucky was starting to get why Sam felt annoyed with his staring problem now that he had first hand experience. Though she wasn't glaring at him like he would at Sam, but still, she was staring at him most of the time. And the lack of words made it more noticeable. "You don't talk much do you?" He asked, there was a hint of passive-aggressive in his tone.

And Y/N recognized that tone anywhere. She was surprised that that part of him hasn't change since the 40's. She remembered how Bucky would use this tone whenever he was irritated but he didn't want to be a jerk and yell out his frustration.

The fact that she still managed to notice this little quirks of his after all these years made her chuckle amusingly. There wasn't a voice changer now, it was just her voice; raw and unfiltered. And even if it was muffled behind the cloth of her mask, her laugh sounded awfully familiar to Bucky.

It sounded pretty and soft, that it tickled something in deep within his chest but not enough to trigger any memory from his subconcious, "Then, what are you doing here?" He asked curiously.

It took a moment of blinking silence before Y/N grabbed onto the fabric of her hood; she pulled it back and it revealed her slightly wavy hair dipped in raven. Bucky watched intently as her index finger slipped into the tiny slot at the side of her nose, hooking it on the fabric of her mask.

And those mere seconds of hesitation triggered the tears to form in her eyes. Her heart beating fast, tiredlessly pumping blood through the veins of her body yet her fingers still runs cold with fear.

Between the thumping sound of her own heartbeat, she might have second guessed her own decision of revealing her identity. Thinking that maybe it was best to leave the truth untold. Because what if Bucky refused to believe her?

It would truly destroy her; this time, beyond repair.

Y/N briefly closed her eyes as she breathed in, she then pulled the mask down to reveal her face. The crack in her voice betrayed the smile that curved on her trembling lips, "I'm here for you." She finally spoke.

The upward movement of muscle around her cheeks pushed her tears out, letting it flow from the corner of her eyes. She didn't dare to look at him in the face for too long, so her eyes casted downwards to where her feet dug the ground.

Decades passed and it might have been several lifetimes for Y/N since the 40's but it only felt like it was yesterday for Bucky. Especially when he had lived many years of his life to either be awake for the Winter Soldier or asleep in the freezing chambers.

All of which were just scattered of loose memories to him now. It haunted him, yes. But sometimes he couldn't tell if it was just a series of nightmares or actual reality. Thus, he tends to feel as if he had lost his sense of time. That is why he always felt out of place in the modern society.

Inside, he felt like he was still the man he was in the 40's; just thrusted forward in time. And since he started to tap into the memories of himself in those olden times, it made him felt like it hasn't been that long for Bucky since he last saw her.

Yes, he felt like it was just short distance of time but his soul certainly didn't feel the same. It had been deprived of its other half for far too long.

All the images of their time together flashed rapidly through his mind; every touch, every kiss, every laughter and even every tears they ever shared, all came rushing in like untamed waves crashing to the shore.

The beautiful strings of chaos in his head hadn't calm the slightest, in fact it pushed Bucky to move forward; to catch her silhouette before it could disappear on him like the way it always does in his dreams.

Y/N's vision was blocked when Bucky smushed her face to his chest, trapping her in an unbreakable embrace as he whispered her name, "y/n?"

Was he talking to her or was he talking to himself? Because he didn't stop muttering her name as if it was some sort of a ritual chanting.

Bucky's hand briefly roamed her body from the back of her head, barely passing her shoulders, across the spine and then folded around her waist, drawing her in; impossibly closer.

That was when she felt his body shake; much like herself, Bucky was crying for the lost time that they will never make back, for the pieces of hearts broken in those decades that they lived without one another.

Bucky had witness some unbelievable things throughout his long life on this earth; lots of mind-boggling creation of man-made technology, actual magic and sorcerers, aliens and literal Gods.

He should know that nothing is impossible. Yet, holding Y/N in his arms felt unbelievably surreal to him.

Before she managed to draw in the air, her body felt the need to melt into his form. She can feel his firm grasp around her frame, and feel how rapid his heart beating on her cheek.

At that moment, she couldn't help but to find resemblance of him to his past habits; he way he holds her, how his fingers would occasionally dance across her body, or how his nose would nudge into her hair.

Even his scent remained the same. At least the essence of it were unchanged.

Being in his arms reminded her of the whispers of promises Bucky made to her, "You promised to come home." Y/N tried to steady her breath, "You promised to come back to me."

Bucky pulled her head back, cradling her face in the contrast of his hands; one was once warm and another that felt familiar. He desperately wiped her tears away with his thumbs, almost too rough of a caress but surprisingly it brought more relief than pain to her.

Even in the sorrow and grief, anger managed to slipped through when she growled, "You dickhead, you left me behind." Though it was weak, her punches still hits the target perfectly.

Repeatedly slamming her tiny fists on his sturdy chest. The chest that were caged with heavy remorse and regret. And there wasn't really anything he could say to sooth the pain that she felt when he died.

Bucky knew that, but he had to say something, anything, "I-doll, I'm so sorry..." He was drowning her with his eyes, flooding her heart with his tears as his hand ran through her hair. Soft as he remembered it to be; at least compared from the lucid dreams she was starring in.

"Shhh!" Y/N hushed him quickly, "Just please..." her breath shuddered when she inhaled.

She didn't spend most of her lifetimes to hear an apology, not from him. If anything, he should swear on his life to never leave again, to stay this time around and always. She tugged him closer, lips hovering over each other's, just one nudge away to finally get the sweet taste of it, "...never again."

And when he kissed her, it tastes of her tears. But it was beyond fulfilling. Like their lost soul were finally being able to touch again. The gentle need, the tender crave of his kiss was enough to forge her trust back into its former glory.

And all of the sudden Bucky felt like he was drowning again; like he was desperate to breathe and she was the air. He kissed her again, and again, and again. As if he needed the taste of her lips to survive the waves; like she was his lighthouse in dark.

When they finally set apart, she wanted to speak but all she can do was croak, "Don't leave me, not again." Bucky's lips curved into a loving smile and he nods once. He folded her frame in his arms, tightly and closely; his whisper was ever-so-soft when he promised, "Never."

End.

Read my other works here: Masterlist

A/N: Did you notice two dialogue throwback from when Bucky was rescued in 1943? "I didnt come all the way here to fight with you, James" and "I'm here for you" Anyway, I hope you enjoyed this one. Thanks for reading and maybe tell you what you think?

#winterarmyyfics #promise me au #bucky x reader #bucky x you #bucky barnes au #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes x you #40s!bucky #tfatws!bucky #winter soldier!bucky

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lostgirlmuseum · 4 months

Text

The Swan and the Soldier

^made w/ pinterest

Pairing: tfatws!Bucky x f!dancer!reader

Summary: Bucky is signed up to act in the Nutcracker against his will. But it isn’t all bad. At least not after he meets the cute costume designer.

Words: 5.6k (oops)

Warnings: Mention of an injury + brief description of pain, poor writing at times, lemme know if I missed anything

A/N: I really hope this isn't complete dog shit

(Dividers by me😎)

“You want me to what?”

Bucky dropped his sandwich back onto his plate.

“I was gonna do it but I’m too busy to make every rehearsal.”

Bucky had been staying in Louisiana for the past month, finally taking a break from going from fight to fight. Sam encouraged him to stay with him at Sarah’s place, which Bucky did for a while, but after a couple of weeks, he decided to rent his own place. He was still near to Sam, and was at his house nearly every day, seeing as he was only a fifteen-minute drive away. Bucky just felt like less of a burden this way.

“And I’m not busy?” Bucky countered, staring at Sam from across the kitchen table, where they were taking a quick lunch break before getting back to the boat.

“Well—”

“Shut up.”

“It would mean so much to AJ. It’s his first dance recital and I think he would be a lot less nervous if someone he knew was on stage with him.”

“I’m not a ballerina, Sam.”

“You don’t have to be!” He quickly uttered, putting down his own sandwich. “They just need a couple of parent volunteers to step in and play the adults at the beginning of the show.”

“I haven’t liked dancing since the 40’s. And I don’t know how I feel about being on stage. Would I have to wear a costume?”

“It’s the Nutcracker.” Sam raised an eyebrow and gave Bucky a judgmental once over. “I don’t think it fits the show to have you dressed like an angsty motorcyclist.”

“Sam, I don’t think I can—”

“Uncle Bucky!” A cheerful voice entered the room as AJ came bounding up to the table.

“Hey, kid,” Bucky smiled, giving the boy a quick fist bump.

“Uncle Sam told me you would be a part of my recital!”

“He said what now?”

“What?” AJ asked, oblivious.

“Nothing, I—AJ, could you give Uncle Sam and me a second?”

AJ nodded and skipped back outside into the sun. Bucky glared over at Sam.

“So maybe I jumped the gun a bit…”

“Samuel.”

“You can say no,”

“You know I can’t say no now!” Bucky flung his hands out, exasperated.

“You can! You’ll just disappoint him. But if that’s what you want to do—” Sam trailed off, taking a bite out of his turkey and provolone.

“This is manipulation.”

“Is it working?” Sam mumbled and swallowed.

Bucky shook his head and stared at his plate. “You owe me.”

“Big time! Promise.”

“I can’t believe I’m doing this,” Bucky mumbled, planting his face in his palms.

“Rehearsals are Tuesdays and Thursdays,” Sam got up from the table and grabbed his now empty plate, “you’re making the kid really happy.”

“Yeah, yeah. To be clear, I am doing this for him. Not you. I don’t give a shit about you.” He pointed.

“Love you too, Buddy.”

Bucky found himself that very Thursday at the ballet studio, in a small group of parents, as a petite young woman—well, she looked about 60, but compared to Bucky, she was young—introduced herself, a southern accent clear in her cheery tone.

“Welcome parents and volunteers! Most of you already know me, but I’m Ms. Cindy, the head of this program and this year’s Nutcracker! I’d like to start by thanking all of you for taking time out of your busy schedules to be here and support us and your children. It’s you who keep this dance studio up and running, and I’m so grateful for that. Throughout today, you’ll each get called to get your measurements taken so we can be sure that the costumes are ready before the performance. And as for roles, we’ll figure that out at the end of class. I have to go teach the little ones, but feel free to take a seat and watch the choreography your students have been learning all season!”

Bucky followed the others, who seemed to already be acquainted with each other, into a small observing room attached to the studio where AJ was practicing. Bucky stuck himself in the back corner and watched AJ through the one-sided mirror for only a couple of minutes when his name was suddenly called.

“James Barnes?”

Bucky looked up to see a woman standing in the doorway. He ignored the glances that turned his way as he followed the woman out the door.

Did they know who he was? Did they know what he had done? Or maybe they had no idea. Maybe they were judging him for not engaging with them in polite conversation, maybe they thought he was weird for hiding silently in the corner.

Bucky pushed the thoughts out of his head as the (attractive, he might add,) woman opened the door for him into a new room. It wasn’t huge, but it wasn’t a closet either, and Bucky immediately noted the lines of clothing racks stuffed with colorful dresses that lined the walls.

“I just need to get your measurements quickly for your costume. I can take them now, or if you’re more comfortable, I can send you a list of measurements I need and you can get those numbers to me on Thursday if you’d prefer.”

Bucky thought for a moment. He wasn’t entirely sure how to take his own measurements, and he sure as hell did not want Sam of all people helping him. On the other hand, having a stranger so close to him sounds embarrassing and stressful. But he saw the kindness in her eyes, and oddly enough, he felt he could trust her.

“Now is fine."

“Sounds good.” She gave the sweetest smile he had ever seen and told him where to stand. He took off his jacket with ease, feeling somewhat comfortable knowing he had a long-sleeved shirt under to hide his metal arm. He kept his leather gloves on, and she said nothing.

She demonstrated to him how to hold his arm, and he obeyed, holding his right arm out and bent at the elbow. She chatted as she brought the tape measure along his arm. “Which kid is yours?”

“Oh, none of them.”

He noticed the subtle tilt of her head.

“I mean, I’m not a dad, but I’m AJ’s uncle. Well, a friend of his uncle but,”

Luckily, she stopped his ramble before he could truly embarrass himself.

“Oh, you’re Bucky?” She dropped the tape to her side and smiled. “I’ve met Sam a couple times, but I’ve heard all about you and him from Sarah.”

“Oh? All good things I hope?”

He asked in a lighthearted tone, but in reality, he was terrified of the things she’d heard about him.

“Only good things.” She grinned and grabbed the pencil behind her ear to scribble a number on a chart.

“That’s a relief.” His eyes scanned the room, trying to think up conversation to fill the silence. “So are you a parent volunteer?”

“Not a parent, no. I used to be a part of this program growing up. It’s done so much for me, and I wanted to stay connected, so I help out here and there when I can. I mostly fit the costumes.”

“That’s cool.”

Cool. Cool. Cool response Bucky. Ask her a question, dammit.

“Do you still dance?”

“Not anymore. Can you put both arms out to the side please?” She asked, and Bucky lifted his arms so she could measure his chest. She continued to make conversation as she wrapped the tape around him. “AJ is a great student. He has a lot of potential, he just needs to find his confidence. And he’s a great kid. You’re a lucky uncle.”

“I am,” Bucky responded, trying desperately to not freak out at how close she was to him, and how she was only going lower, as she moved to his waist.

She took a break to write down a couple more numbers and returned to him.

“Now I need a hip measurement, so I have to measure around your butt. Is that okay?”

Bucky gave a convincing nod. “Do what you gotta do.”

‘Do what you gotta do’? What the hell am I saying?

He avoided looking at her and held his breath as she brought the tape around his hips.

“Just a couple more measurements and you’ll be out of here,” she assured, dropping the tape from his hips. “You can put your arms down now.”

Bucky let his arms rest at his sides.

She quickly went about measuring his legs and finished a couple of minutes later.

“You’re all good to go, Mr. Barnes, thank you!”

“You can call me Bucky,” he tried to hide his bashful smile and started to exit out the door, but stopped and turned at the last moment. “What was your name again?”

“Oh, I’m Y/N.”

“It was nice to meet you, Y/N.”

He liked the way it felt on his tongue. With that, he said goodbye and returned to the observing room.

Thirty minutes later class was nearly over. All that was left on the agenda for the day was to form the groups.

“So it seems we have an odd number…Lois, is this everyone?” Ms. Cindy asked, looking over to her assistant.

“Everyone that signed up, yes.” Lois, a shorter girl with an auburn bob, tapped on a clipboard.

“Let’s just see how this goes. Mr. and Mrs. Tudor will be group one, Mr. and Mrs. Malone will be group two, Mrs. and Mrs. Cardoza will be group three, and that leaves Mr. Barnes…”

“We could have him be a single parent to his group?” Lois offered, looking up from her list.

“We could, but then who would he dance with at the party scene?”

Bucky swore he saw a literal lightbulb light up above Ms. Cindy’s head as her gaze fixated somewhere in the back of the room where you were simply passing by.

“Oh, Y/N? Dear?” She called in a uniquely falsetto voice.

“Yes, Ms. Cindy?” Y/N answered, pausing.

“I realize you’re already doing our costumes, but would you be interested in volunteering as one of the parents? We are short a person.”

“Oh, um…”

“You can think about it Dear. It’s no trouble if you feel that it’ll take up too much time, we appreciate you for your dedication to the costumes.” Ms. Cindy was careful to add.

Despite her initial hesitance, Y/N spoke up.

“I can do it.”

“Are you sure?” Ms. Cindy blinked, surprised by the answer.

“Yeah,” she breathed, “yes. I’ve already got measurements, all I need to do is submit an order. And I can’t tailor anything anyways until the shipment comes in.”

“A round of applause for our beautiful and dedicated Y/N, everyone!” Ms. Cindy cheered and began clapping her hands in a circle. The parents all joined in, and Bucky gave a quiet few claps. “That means Mr. Barnes and Y/N will play the fourth couple. Splendid!”

Lois tapped Ms. Cindy on the shoulder and pointed to her watch. Time was almost up. Ms. Cindy was fast to get back to business.

“Now let’s quickly assign each group their children, and then we can end rehearsal.”

“Buck, I’ve got some good news.” Sam’s voice flowed through Bucky’s phone.

It was Tuesday morning, and Bucky had been up and dressed since seven in the morning, eager to pick AJ up, even though class wasn’t until 5 p.m. He was currently lying on the couch, watching the clock tick by.

“What, you finally learned to use the potty like a big boy?” Bucky mocked.

“It was one time. ONE. TIME. You know I don’t fuck with clowns!”

“I don’t like clowns either, but you don’t see me shitting myself at the Halloween Festival.” Bucky quietly chuckled.

“First of all, I didn’t ‘shit’ myself. I peed. A little. And second of all, I had a lot of hot chocolate beforehand, and my bladder was at max capacity, and—why the hell am I explaining this to you?”

“Because you know I’m never going to let you live it down.”

“Moving on,” Sam sighed, “I was calling to tell you that you don’t need to be in the performance with AJ anymore.”

Bucky shot up from his lying position. “What do you mean?”

“My schedule freed up a bunch so I can take AJ and be in the show now.”

“Oh.”

Bucky slumped back onto the cushions, dejection dripping from his voice. Sam clearly picked up on it.

“What do you mean, ‘Oh’? I thought this was good news for you. I know I forced it onto you and all, and your thing isn’t really being on stage in front of a bunch of people.”

Bucky picked at the edges of his fingers, carefully considering his next words.

“I mean it’s not my thing, but—I don’t know, I feel like I’ve committed. And I get to spend some time with AJ, y’know? And, truth be told, it’s not all bad.”

There was a pause on the line before Sam’s voice rang through.

“That’s awfully sweet Buck. And very out of character for you.”

“Shut the fuck up, I can be nice.”

“Yes, of course. Bucky Barnes, the world’s famous sweetheart, how could I forget?”

“I’m hanging up now,” Bucky warned.

“Bye, metal man.”

“Fuck off bird brain.” Bucky was about to hang up, but quickly added in a serious tone, “I’ll be there this afternoon to pick AJ up.”

“You’re a good man.”

“Whatever.”

“Welcome back everybody!” Ms. Cindy’s high voice rang. “We are going to practice the beginning of the show where the families enter the party. We’ll take it group by group, so let’s start with group one, the Tudors. Your family is super excited for this party, so we’ll have you enter stage right and I need the children to be skipping and bubbly.”

Ms. Cindy instructed the groups one by one. Eventually, she got to Bucky’s group, which he shared with you and four kids, including AJ.

“And our final group, group four, is the family that does not want to attend. The parents should be trying to get the kids to smile, and at least act like they are happy to be there.”

Bucky let you take the lead and simply followed what you did. He walked beside you, stopped when you stopped, turned when you turned.

“Good, now make it look like you are trying to get the kids to smile.”

Bucky copied the way you pointed to your cheery smile and did his best to ignore the embarrassment bubbling in his chest.

The comically grumpy—and much better actors than him—kids sighed and plastered on cheery expressions.

“Good, and you can continue walking.” Ms. Cindy ordered.

Group four finished the short trek across the stage successfully. For such a simple task, Bucky had felt surprisingly nervous.

Ms. Cindy quickly gave her praise and ordered everyone to start over. As Bucky and his group were going back to the line, she offered some advice.

“Y/N and Mr. Barnes, could you try holding hands? You don’t look as ‘coupley’ as everyone else.”

Bucky gulped. Of course you don’t look as ‘coupley’ as everyone else, all the other couples are actually couples, and married for God’s sake!

You, on the other hand, simply said “Okay.”

“Group one, go,” Ms. Cindy called, and the Tudors began to cross the makeshift stage.

The line moved forward, and Bucky with it. He began to sweat a little.

Hold your hand? With my left hand? My metal hand?

She simply glanced at him and gave him a small smile.

“And group two,” Ms. Cindy called.

Everyone stepped forward.

The good news is that Bucky was wearing his gloves, but surely she’d notice his hand felt different and think he was weird. Although, did she already know about his arm situation? She did mention that she’d heard about him and Sam from Sarah. Maybe she already knew, and wouldn’t care?

“Group three!”

Bucky looked back at the kids trailing behind him and spotted AJ beaming right back at him. Suddenly, Bucky felt ridiculous.

Bucky, you’re being an idiot. Be a man and hold her hand. It’s not that deep. You’re doing this for AJ.

“And four,”

He grabbed her hand and started to walk with her. The first thing he noticed was how small her hand felt in his. It gave him an unfamiliar tingly feeling in his chest. He wasn’t sure he liked it, but it was better than anxiety.

He tried his best to puff out his chest and mimic her confidence as they walked. Bucky stopped halfway through, like they were supposed to, and turned to face the kids like last time. He pretended to point to his smile and finished the walk across the stage.

“Excellent! Let’s move on.”

Bucky managed to make it through the entire class without sweating his clothes off from nerves.

“You ready to go, AJ?”

AJ yelped, “Wait! I want you to meet one of my friends!” He dramatically waved over to a little girl with a sunflower barrette in her hair who came skipping over. “This is Ava.”

“Hi, Ava.” Bucky gave an awkward smile.

The little girl looked up at him unphased.

“Hi, Mr. Bucky. So are you really a superhero?”

Straight to the point, huh? “Oh—um,”

“He is!” AJ butted in, “He’s friends with my Uncle Sam, they save the world all the time!”

Ava crossed her arms across her chest and jutted a leg out.

“So can you fly?” She squinted.

“Nope, I can’t fly.” Bucky began to rub the back of his neck.

“Can’t your Uncle Sam fly?” She asked, looking at AJ with skepticism.

“Yep!”

“So if you can’t fly, what can you do?”

Before Bucky could even begin to stutter, Y/N appeared.

“Hey, Ava! I think your mom is looking for you.” She said, placing a hand on the girl's shoulder.

“Okay, I gotta go. Bye AJ,” Ava quickly spouted and ran off towards the doors.

“Bye!” AJ shouted.

Bucky noticed Y/N holding his blue cap out to him.

“I think you forgot your hat.” She spoke softly.

“Didn’t even realize, thanks.”

“It’s no problem, Bucky.”

Bucky was about to give a lopsided grin when AJ interjected,

“Only friends and family call him that.”

“Oh, I’m sorry! James, then.” She brought her hand to her cheek.

“No, no, Bucky is fine,” Bucky quickly corrected, “you can call me Bucky.”

“You’re sure? I don’t mean to overstep,”

“You aren’t, I like it when you call me Bucky.”

He instantly felt his cheeks get warm at his confession. Before she could respond, he quickly changed the subject.

“Oh, by the way, I wanted to let you know that I can’t be here at the next rehearsal. AJ will be here, but I completely forgot that I’ve got an appointment that day.” A monthly check-in with Dr. Raynor that he forgot to move. “I don’t know if you want me to meet somewhere instead, or I can just come early on Tuesday and you can catch me up to speed or…I mean whatever you think is best.”

“If you want, we can meet on Friday at my place. I can send you the address if you’d like?”

“Yeah, yes, sure, let me get my phone—” he fumbled while grabbing it out of his pocket, “what’s your number?”

“Hey, come on in!” Y/N appeared behind the crisp white door of a cute house, not unlike the Wilson’s, and gestured inside before grimacing. “Sorry, I should’ve asked before, are you cool with dogs?”

Bucky nodded.

She gave a sigh of relief and fully opened the door. Bucky couldn’t help but smile at the graying corgi staring back at him.

“This is Frank,” Y/N said, bending down to bring the panting dog into her arms.

“Hi, Frank.” Bucky greeted, giving the dog gentle pets with his right hand. “Your house is lovely,” he added after catching a glance around.

“Oh, thanks!” She smiled, walking into the living room area to set the dog down on the couch. “This is actually my parent’s house, I’m just house and dog sitting for the week while they’re out of town. Usually, I live in my apartment.”

“Is this where you grew up?” Bucky asked, eyes searching the place. He noted the multitude of picture frames lining the wall and the slightly worn couch.

“The first eighteen years of my life. I told myself I’d be out of Louisiana by the time I went to college, but clearly that didn’t happen.”

“Where did you want to go?”

“New York, San Francisco, I don’t know, maybe even Australia or France.” she laughed at the absurdity and sighed. “C’est la vie,”

Bucky stuck his thumbs in his pockets and stared down at his feet, unsure of what to do next.

“Can I get you anything? Water? Iced Tea? I can make some coffee. Are you hungry?”

“Just water is fine,”

“Sure, one second.”

Bucky took the opportunity to explore the room. His curiosity was set on the shelf beside the fireplace, and the multitude of shiny awards it adorned.

Several faux gold figures of ballerinas and a plaque filled the space, as well as what looked to be a photo album. Bucky thought better than to touch it, however, he did notice the significant lack of dust on it compared to the trophies.

“I see the obnoxious shrine of my dancing days has caught your attention.”

Bucky spun around, cheeks a little pink at the notion of being caught wandering. He was looking for the right thing to say as you took a seat on the couch and placed the water on the coasters.

“Looks like you’re an amazing dancer.” He nodded, hoping that it was the appropriate thing to say.

She ducked her head at the compliment. “I was okay.” She pointed to just beyond his shoulder at the photo album. “You can look at it if you want,” she offered, clearly sensing his curiosity.

Bucky grabbed the binder from its spot on the shelf and took a seat next to her. He slowly opened the book to the first page.

There you were, 4 years old in a bright pink tutu, beaming at the camera. The page was covered in cute stickers and artistic swirls.

“My mom has a knack for crafty things,” she said, vaguely gesturing to the book.

Bucky hummed and began to gingerly flip through the pages. It was odd but endearing seeing you change through each photo and page, but one thing that stayed constant was your eyes. In every photo they had the same sparkle, the same light. It looked so right on you, but he didn’t recognize it in you now.

Bucky stopped on the page dedicated to age 17 and marveled at the costume you were wearing. He couldn’t look away from the intricate feathers and sequins.

“That was for our Spring production of Swan Lake.”

Bucky turned to see a subtle smile on her lips. She was looking at the book, but it seemed as if she was seeing right through it.

“You were the swan?”

“Odette, yeah.”

Bucky turned the page once more, except this time there was no photo—just the outline of where one would be on a mostly blank page, minus the glittering bold number “18”.

“Anyway, the choreography,” she quickly chimed, her attitude dramatically changing, “I’ve got the video right here, we can watch it first.”

She snatched the album up and placed it back on the shelf before handing him her phone. Bucky watched the thirty-second clip of two of the volunteers—possibly the Tudors if he remembered correctly—as they danced a shockingly simple routine.

“That’s it?” He cocked an eyebrow.

“That’s it.” She assured. “Ready to try it?”

“I might be a little rusty, it’s been a while since I’ve danced.”

She turned on the music and started counting under her breath.

They started by facing each other, their right palms in front of them, and placed against each other. They both took a step in, a step out and circled around the other to which they were now in the opposite places. She curtsied, he bowed, and then they repeated the step in, step out, switch. Now they stood next to each other, and she held her arm out over his. They took three steps forward, and the music grew into a faster tempo.

“Easy enough?” Y/N asked, grabbing her phone to stop the music.

It was suspiciously simple, Bucky thought, but then again, the adults were just a small addition to the show. It’s really about the kids.

“We can make this more interesting.” He remarked.

“What do you mean?”

“Let’s try it again.” Bucky gestured to her phone.

She obliged and restarted the music.

They went through the routine again, all the way to the end at which the music began to speed up. As Y/N went to pause the music again, Bucky grabbed her arm and pulled her in. She gave a surprised gasp, but Bucky wasn’t regretful once he saw the smile on her face. He pulled himself back and began to spin her around and basked in her soft laughs. After pulling her back in again, and dancing around each other, he dipped her. She wrapped her right leg around him in response and he hoped she didn’t notice his smirk transform into a blush.

“Alright Mr. ‘I might be a little rusty’, someone has moves!”

Bucky helped her up once she removed her leg.

“I used to be better,” he mumbled.

“None of that,” she softly chided, bringing his chin up, “where did that confidence just go?”

Bucky shook his head. “I’ll keep practicing, then you’ll see,” he simpered.

Time went on and not a day went by that Bucky didn’t think of you. After weeks of practice, it was finally dress rehearsal. Bucky was surprisingly calm even though they were no longer practicing in a studio, but in the local high school’s theater, in full costume. You held his hand through it—literally, for some parts—and Bucky was grateful for it.

It was Friday night, the final rehearsal before the show the next day, and Bucky was just about to drive off when he realized how cold his hand felt against the steering wheel. He cursed himself and ran back inside, luckily finding his leather gloves sitting on a chair in the wings of the stage. Right as he was about to scamper off, he noticed a figure at the very front of center stage. He recognized her immediately, and without a second thought, he approached from the darkness of the sides and into the light of the stage. She had already changed out of her ballgown and was back in black leggings.

“Hey.” He uttered, slowly taking a seat next to her at the end of the stage. He let his legs dangle over the edge.

“Hey,” she gasped, bringing a hand to her heart. “Sorry, I thought everyone had left.”

“I forgot my gloves.”

“Seems like you have a habit of forgetting things,” she teased.

“Only when it comes to clothing, apparently.”

“Is AJ not waiting for you?”

“No, he left with a friend. He’s got a sleepover with Marshall tonight.”

“Gotcha.”

A thoughtful quiet settled over them, but Bucky couldn’t ignore the somberness in her eyes, gazing over the expanse of empty velvet seats.

“Can I ask you something? You don’t have to answer if you don’t want to.”

“Shoot.”

“Why’d you stop dancing?”

She was quiet for a minute. Bucky started to think she wasn’t going to answer, but eventually, she whispered,

“I didn’t have much of a choice.”

She began mindlessly rubbing her knee.

“I tore my ACL my senior year. It was our annual production of The Nutcracker and I was cast as the Sugar Plum Fairy. There was a rumor that some influential talent scouts were going to be attending. So when my knee started hurting I ignored it. I didn’t tell anyone. I worked my ass off and pushed myself harder when I really should have been resting, but I was stupid.” She gave Bucky a short glance. “Opening night came, and so did my solo. Everything was going fine until I heard a pop. Next thing I know my leg is on fucking fire and I’m hitting the ground.

“I embarrassed myself and our entire company. My knee took longer to heal than it should have because of more poor choices I made. What should have been nine months of healing turned into years. By the time it was safe enough to start dancing again, it was too late. I was too far behind my peers. Even still I sometimes have issues with it.”

Bucky simply nodded, taking in her words.

“I tell myself I’m over it because it was so long ago. But deep down I know I’m not. I’ve asked my parents to take down all of my stupid awards, at least store them away somewhere, because it’s just some sick reminder of what I lost. Actually, the whole reason I started volunteering in the first place is because my mom told me I should. Said it could be good for me. She never said so, but I really think she was hoping that by being surrounded by ballet again, I would feel motivated to begin training again. But it’s a pipe dream.”

She took a deep breath and looked up at the ceiling.

“All I ever was was a dancer. And a good one. It was the only thing I was good at, besides sewing, but I only learned that after I injured myself. The whole town knew me as the dancer. I guess the problem with having my entire identity wrapped around one thing is that when that thing goes away…well, who are you? Who am I, if not the girl who’s going to be on the stage one day? My entire identity was ripped from me.

“I’ve just been wading through life. Time keeps moving and crashing around me, but I haven’t changed. I still don’t know who I am, besides the girl who could’ve been great. And now I’m just—stuck.”

Her eyes went wide for a second before squeezing them shut as if she had forgotten she wasn’t alone.

“God, I’m so sorry, you didn’t need to know all of that—”

“No, I—” Bucky stopped her and hesitated to rest his hand on hers. “I can empathize. I hate that you had to go through that. That you’re still going through it. I can understand not knowing who you are anymore.

“A long time ago, I used to be someone else. I used to be charming, independent… happy. But after I was drafted my identity was no longer my own. I was a fighter. I belonged to the army. And then I belonged to Hydra. And even after, I belonged to the Avengers, the world, whoever needed me to fight, I was their soldier. But I’m tired.” At those words, Bucky slumped. “I don’t want to fight anymore. But I have no fucking clue who I am if not a soldier. I’ve been trying to figure that out.”

“I can’t tell you who you are,” she whispered after a moment, “but I can tell you that whoever you are, I like you.”

Bucky blushed.

“I like you too. It’s kind of embarrassing actually,”

“What is?”

“I didn’t really want to volunteer for this. Sam forced me. And while I love being here for AJ, I’d much rather hang out with him outside the theater where I’m not expected to be looked at on stage. But then I met this pretty costume designer…and suddenly it wasn’t so bad.”

“Pretty?” She asked, tilting her head.

“Beautiful. Absolutely gorgeous.” He specified.

“What a coincidence. I also met the most handsome and charming man recently.”

“Charming?”

“He doesn’t realize how charming he is. I guess that’s part of his charm.”

“He sounds great.” He turned to face her more directly. “Just to be clear, you are talking about me, yes?”

“Yes, you oaf.” She laughed.

Bucky pursed his lips.

“Would you be willing to let this oaf take you out on a date sometime?”

“More than willing.”

“That’s a relief,” he sighed, falling back onto the stage. “I figured it was 50/50.”

She gave him a silly grin and shook her head in amusement.

“You underestimate yourself, Bucky Barnes.”

The final performance was perfect. Well, as perfect as it could be with a production of the Nutcracker with dancers ages ranging from 6 to 106. Most importantly, AJ had fun and did a fantastic job. After the show and final bows, Sarah, Sam, and Cass came rushing onto the stage to congratulate AJ (and Bucky of course. Sam made sure to tell him that he was very proud of how brave he was, and Bucky rolled his eyes. He secretly appreciated it, though.) Cass handed one bouquet to his little brother and the other to his uncle, who funny enough lit up in a similar way as his nephew at the gift. But Y/N lit up the most when Sarah handed a third bouquet to her.

“For keeping Bucky in line, and giving a beautiful performance,” Sarah clarified.

“You’re so sweet,” she beamed, pulling Sarah in for a quick hug. “I have the perfect vase for this.”

“Can we go get ice cream now?” AJ jumped.

“Let’s get you out of your costume first,” Sam said and gave a quick wink to Bucky before herding his sister and Nephews backstage. “We’ll see you by the car Buck.”

Bucky nodded and turned his full attention to Y/N. He felt weirdly high after the performance. “Wanna join us for ice cream?” He asked, placing his hands on her waist.

“Gladly.” She smiled and wrapped her arms around his neck.

I like dancing with you.

A/N: If you've made it this far, tysm for reading!!! I really hope this doesn't suck complete ass, idk what happened 😰 Im going to go hide in a hole now and question everything

If you'd like to read more, here's my Masterlist

Happy holidays!

#bucky fic #bucky barnes fic #bucky fanfic #bucky barnes fanfic #bucky fanfiction #bucky x reader #bucky x f!reader #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes x f!reader #tfatws!Bucky #dancer!reader #costumer!reader #bucky fluff #bucky angst #bucky x y/n #bucky barnes angst #bucky barnes fluff

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bucky-barnes-diaries · 5 months

Text

Day 2 — Playing In The Snow

Pairing || TFATWS!Bucky x Female!Reader

Word Count || Around 800

Contents & Warnings || Fluff, very mild Smut — mild explicit content.

Disclaimer || English is not my first language so I apologise for any mistakes or misunderstandings!

Advent Calendar Masterlist

It was a meticulous task, a delicate construction of precise measurements as you and Bucky rolled lumps of snow to create the ideal snowman. Each piece had to be just right, perfectly fitting to form the flawless figure.

Along with the engineering-like consultation, there was abundant laughter, joy, and love shared between you and Bucky as you had fun in the snow.

“I think the bottom piece is done,” you declared, brushing off excess snow from the perfectly rounded shape.

“Help me with the middle piece, doll.”

Although Bucky was more than capable of placing the second piece on top, building the snowman was a joint effort. So you joined forces, lifting it onto the base.

“And now, for the head.” Bucky hoisted the final snowball from the ground and handed it to you. “Would you do the honors, doll?”

With Bucky standing behind you, guiding your hands to ensure precision, you carefully positioned the head, completing the sculpture. The snowman’s height nearly matched your own, a testament to the grandness of your craftsmanship.

“Now, for the finishing touches,” you exclaimed excitedly, detailing the face with coal eyes, a mouth, and a carrot for a nose. Bucky speared sticks into the sides, resembling arms, and placed three small stones as buttons in a perfect line down the middle.

The last additions were the hat and scarf, which Bucky left you to complete. He watched with admiration as you worked, appreciating your childlike joy as the snowman took on a personality and style of its own.

It was finished.

“We did a good job,” Bucky muttered against your frosty cheek, his arms encircling your waist.

“We sure did, babe,” you hummed, leaning into him, securing your arms around his in a shared appreciation of your handiwork.

This moment was more than just the creation of a snowman; it symbolized the safety and love you felt with Bucky. It was an assurance that you could be carefree and childlike with him, free from judgment, and he trusted you similarly.

Together, you could do anything, no matter how childish or silly, as long as it was with him. With Bucky, everything felt right.

Like right now, you didn’t mind being two grown adults playing in the snow like giddy children.

The serene moment came to an end when Bucky pulled you closer, and you both tumbled into the snow. You shrieked as you landed beside him. The plump snow and layers of clothing softened the fall.

“What are you doing, Bucky?” you chuckled as he drew you closer to his bundled body, his nose nuzzling yours as you lay in the snow.

“Can’t a man kiss his perfect girl while they lay in the snow?” he mumbled, grazing your lips with his, electrifying you with his touch and words.

With a soft moan, you rolled on top of him, kissing him passionately, longing for the feel of his warm tongue against yours. Your hands moved against his clothed torso, desiring the removal of clothing for a more intimate touch. Done were you with playfulness; you wanted Bucky to ravish you passionately in the snow.

A deep, playful chuckle rumbled in Bucky’s throat as he shifted positions, pinning your lower body down with his hips and securing both your hands above your head with one of his own. He was singing your body alive, and the wickedness in his eyes showed that he shared your desire for something naughtier.

“You know what I want, doll?” he whispered in your ear with his deep voice, causing you to arch your hips towards his.

“W-what?”

“I. Want, To.” With each word, he drew nearer your face, and you were sure he was about to claim your lips.

“HAVE A SNOWBALL FIGHT!”

Your beloved boyfriend smashed a handful of snow in your face, leaving you gasping in disbelief.

“JAMES BUCHANAN BARNES!”

Bucky quickly leaped away from you, seeking cover from the retaliation he knew was coming.

“You’re a dead man walking, Barnes!” you declared as you got to your knees, brushing the snow from your face and crafting your snowball, ready for revenge.

“I don’t care that you’re a Super Soldier. I’m gonna end you, babe!” You rose to your feet, ready for the impending battle.

“Bring it, doll. Show me what you’ve got,” Bucky taunted, holding a snowball of his own, a knowing smirk on his face, anticipating the epic battle ahead.

As the first snowball flew, your laughter filled the air, and joyful shouts and delighted shrieks rang out as the snowy world around you transformed into a battleground for your playful rivalry. Once again, your heart was content, knowing you could be carefree with Bucky—your best friend, your lover, and sometimes, an annoying pain in the ass.

Feedback through a comment is highly appreciated! Or let me know through an anonymous ask if that feels more comfortable. As well as a reblog to share my work with other people!

I don’t do taglists so please follow @bucky-barnes-diaries-library and turn on notifications to never miss out on my writing!

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nana-talks · 6 months

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deep red

pairing: tfatws!bucky x fem!reader word count: 2k genre: angst & steam

notes: inspired by deep red by movements. gif by @unearthlydust. again, writing during work hours, so bear with me.

he can still taste her on his lips, feel the curve of her hips beneath his palms. he looks from his hands to his reflection starring back at him in the mirror. it’s been a few months and he continues to struggle to recognize his own face. his dark circles are there, albeit slightly faded. he has new wrinkles, one on each side of his mouth. smile lines?

and I can't tell if this is all a dream or if I'm really here

he’s trying to calm his beating heart, watching the water run down the drain until he can feel the rise and fall of his breath have evened out. he runs his fingers through his hair, pushing the dark locks away from his face before he opens the bathroom door.

and there she is, sitting cross-legged on top of the mattress, his t-shirt hanging loosely around her shoulders. she had her eyes closed, but faced the bathroom, as if she was waiting for him. he padded softly and quietly across the bedroom floor towards her. his job had allowed him to develop this skill very well, he thought to himself, self-depricatingly. right as he reached her, she opened her eyes.

“hey” she said softly. “you ok?”

“yeah” he responded. he wanted to touch her face, and despite the itching, he did. she nuzzled her cheek against his rough palm, letting her hair fall against her face. he pushed them away, feeling his heart pick up speed once again.

but as long as I can feel you, I don't really care

she reached up to his wrist, wrapping her hands around the vibranium, feeling the sensation of the cold material against her warm flushed skin. she felt herself blush beneath his hard stare. she wanted to tell him she loved him, but couldn’t bring herself to break the moment. she felt like he knew already.

“you hungry?” he asked, voice barely there.

“nope.” she shook her head from side to side. “would you mind if we laid here? just a bit longer?”

she hoped he wouldn’t feel embarrassed for getting up so soon after he finished. he tried, she could see - he stood still, his chest against hers, for almost 3 full minutes before he got up. he hoped she didn’t feel him shudder slightly at the question, fighting the urge to cringe from his actions from minutes ago. he just nodded, and she smiled, climbing upwards towards the pillows before he followed her.

and there they laid, as they usually did every single night, one right next to each other, just their hands intertwined. she kept her hold tight against his fingers. she knew he was getting better, but touch was still something he struggled with. she could only imagine having all your terrible memories attached to the feeling of hands and machines against your skin.

cold skin all the time / idle hands so you hold mine / you say it helps with keeping you together and you hold tight / i’m losing feeling in my fingers but i don’t mind

which is why she was surprised that evening when he knocked on her door and crashed his lips against hers, without even saying hello. she didn’t want him to stop, but she knew something must have happened. she tried asking if he was okay, but all he answered was “i need to feel something”. his taste, his fingers against her scalp, she couldn’t concentrate enough to respond. he pushed her up against the door, his roughness soft against her.

can we pretend like it's just you and me? / i wanna act like I can feel something

“i’m sorry” he whispered, and she finally opened her eyes, climbing out of her memories.

“for what?” she asked, frowning slightly

“for coming over like that…” he shrugged, hoping she’d understand. “for being rough.”

she couldn’t help but let out a scoff, pulling his vibranium fingers to rest against her lips. “you were pretty soft to me.” she said.

“yeah?” he wanted to believe her so bad.

“yeah…” she nodded. “i felt… wanted.” she struggled to not say loved, to not scare him off. “it was… hot.”

he blushed, and tried looking away from her, to hide the crimson on his cheeks, but her pull was too strong. if only she knew just how much he wanted her.

“but…” she said, moving her eyes to their intertwined hands. “i can’t help but think… what… what prompted all of that?” she blushed, growing warm and he could hear her heart beat running.

he couldn’t let her know that his latest amend hadn’t gone to plan. he barely mentioned it to dr. raynor last session, just hinting that things weren’t as easy as she had led on, in his usually sarcastic tone. it was embarrassing how fast he slipped back into someone he wasn’t proud to be. and the only place he felt real was underneath her steady gaze.

“i don’t know.” he shrugged. he felt her eyebrows slightly turn. she could read him like no other. she knew he wasn’t being truthful, knew he was ashamed of his past and whenever that was brought up, he’d deflect. and at some point, she understood that was something that would only come with time and was willing to just go from there. “i just wanted to be with you, i guess.”

she nodded. he was slowly starting to understand the concept of giving it all. it didn’t matter if they had finally had sex for the first time, it didn’t matter that he could feel her heartbeat on the palm of his hand as she came - nothing would feel as intimate as sharing his darkest memories and thoughts with her.

he sighed, closing his eyes, feeling her tight fingers around his. she was there, right there, as she had been this whole entire time. there had been nothing he had shared so far that had made her run - not his reasoning behind the amends, not his memories from war, not even why he was always so hesitant to touch her or be touched by her.

not only had she never run, but she had always been willing to surrender herself entirely to him, even when he couldn't keep up with her to the same extent.

and you don't have to give it back to me / ‘cause I can't promise much of anything

“yori was my amend this week.” he whispered, squeezing his eyes, feeling his shoulders tense up. she gripped his fingers tighter, fighting the “oh” that was on the back of her throat. “i feel embarrassed that i befriended him when he was an amend all along, but i couldn’t bring myself to say the words! did you know he had an entire altar for his son? i- i did that.”

“but you’re no longer the winter soldier.” she said. “he did that. not you.”

the slowly growing itch he felt just took over; he couldn’t take it any longer. feeling claustrophobic, he shot up from the bed, fighting the urge to just run away. he leaned against the window, watching the bright city lights slip through the curtains. he was trying to slow down his breathing but all he could listen is yori’s whispered “why” and his meek “i didn’t have a choice”. what a fucking cop-out, he thought, running his fingers angrily through his hair.

before his hands could find their way across his own cheeks, she was there, beside him. she wrapped her arms around his waist, ducking underneath his arms to stand between him and the cold glass. she looked up at him and he was expecting a look of pity, but all he could see was… was that love?

“thank you. for trusting me and sharing that.” she said, kissing his sternum before resting her chin against him. he sees the shine in her eyes, tries to see himself in their reflection. he might really no longer be the winter soldier if he’s someone she’s willing to love.

his skin is tingling, like he’s about to itch again, but he won’t let that drive him away this time. so he tucked his fingers on the nape of her neck, intertwining with her hair, before pulling her against his mouth.

his breath faltered when their tongues touched again. he could recall, somewhat now, how hard he had let himself fall when he first felt her like this that evening. the way he had shoved her against her door, the way he couldn't contain his hands from traveling up and down her body. he was scared of letting that happen again, of losing control, so he stepped back, brushing his lips against her cheeks before hiding on the crook of her neck.

she pushed her hands against his waist, towards the bed, not allowing him to slow down to a stop. he jokingly let go of his body weight, falling forward towards her and she giggled, before shoving him backwards a bit harder. as he sat back on the mattress, he finally looked at her - her bruised lips, her flushed cheeks, her tangled hair and her starry eyes. he pulled her in between his thighs and she caressed his cheeks lovingly, before kissing his temples, his eyelids, his cheekbones, his nose and his lips.

the feather light touch of her fingertips against his stubble, the feeling of his hands wrapping around her waist, their tastes. he held tight against her frame as he slowly twisted and dipped her against the bed, her head hitting the pillow softly.

dive into you / (and open the blinds)

he tried hovering above her, but slowly, she spread her legs and pulled him in between them, brushing over him and moaning gently against his lips. she felt him holding back, but the more they kissed, the more the sounds he made hinted he’d started letting go.

take all of me / (you become my guide)

he still felt the prickling trail against his skin, following wherever she touched. he still could hear the faint sound of feels wrong on the back of his mind. he pulled back, searching for her eyes, to see himself in their reflection.

make me brand new / (to live through your eyes)

there she was beneath him, in between his extended arms. and this time that look of love was undeniable. he couldn’t look away and she held him steady. it was like the words were at the tip of his tongue. she smiled, reaching up to run her fingers over the contours of his face, memorizing every detail she could.

“i wish you could see what i see.” she whispered.

“it’s okay... i think my view is pretty sweet.” he said in between her fingers that ran over his lips. she would have rolled her eyes at his compliment, but he crashed his lips against hers once more.

for someone that was struggling so hard to let go of his fears and his ghosts, he kissed like that was all nothing, he touched her like his hands were made to please her body, he fit inside her like that was his purpose all along. and she knew that to be true because he made her see stars like nobody else before (and like nobody else would after).

and bucky still didn’t know then, but the next time she touched him, it would be to check if he was really sound asleep. but he’d lay there, with her on his chest, breathing heavily. and there would be no sting, or prick, or itch - not again for a long time.

so I can finally sleep / (deep red at the sunrise)

#bucky barnes #bucky x reader #bucky barnes angst #bucky barnes smut #bucky barnes fanfic #everyone should listen to this song - i thought of bucky immediately!!!

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notafunkiller · 18 days

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I know many Bucky fans are mad, but I never expected him to have a lot of screen time in Thunderbolts* to begin with. Especially with such a huge team (and they need to be*come* likeable and relatable to the audience).

Thunderbolts* is NOT a solo movie, it's a team movie (Suicide Squad style).

He should've gotten a Winter Soldier film ages ago (getting some of memories back in Romania so we see many flashbacks), but in Thunderbolts*, he doesn't need to have 2h of screen time to be a key character.

And this is what I care about the most... Quality > quantity

In his MCU journey, we always found him in different stages (and this is what made it fun and exciting for Sebastian too) & I love the fact we get to put two and two together and try to understand hints rather than straight up being told everything about his life.

He is one of the most interesting characters & he carried the Cap triology (and Marvel knows it). He got less than 15 minutes of screen time & 13 lines in CATWS (a movie with his name in the title) & still stole the show... he always steals the show, he's "the underdog".

He's super popular & so is Sebastian. They don't bother to use him more because they know people (come to the cinema to) watch anything if he is in it.

They saw that with "Dumb Money".

So they might even give us Bucky in small doses intentionally.

Sebastian got more projects left, which = a safe paycheck he can use for other projects.

(This is why I disagree when people say he should leave Marvel as if:

1. He doesn't have a strict contract with more projects left & he wouldn't need to pay;

2. He doesn't need the money - to pay his employees, to produce & play in other films)

3. He doesn't find it comforting to play Bucky every 3 years...

He loves Bucky (and he is similar to Bucky) & he always gets to explore different sides of the character when he returns, which is amazing for an actor.

Also, Kevin said Bucky is the de facto leader, after all. And that doesn't mean his role isn't important (CATWS & CACW are good examples), quite the opposite.

(I think he might have a subplot & save the team at the end)

We all got ??? when we thought he's in the team because he is already pardoned. He proved he is "stable" in TFATWS.

It makes sense to me if he has his own thing.

The fact the team has to "earn the trust" aka go into a suicide mission bc they are seen as disposable is sick.

(Bucky is seen like this, too)

There is no good or bad side & Bucky sees right through this. He always did.

I'm glad Yelena is finally a lead, though & I wonder how she'll use the opportunity to take revenge on Valentina.

Also, I think she'll lose her dad (sacrifice maybe), and that will be an amazing scene.

I really hope Bucky & Yelena have at least one scene (maybe he is sent to lead them in the middle of the film or he just shows up to save the team at the end). They are similar, yet different, so a great, great duo.

Florence and Sebastian are 🙌🏻 (incredible actors... they portray the characters with so much passion. They know them so well) and I can sense a lottt of chemistry.

My point is: things always change, you never know with MCU & so let's wait and hope it's a good film⚡️

#my opinion #thunderbolts #thunderbolts*#yelena belova #bucky barnes #sebastian stan #florence pugh #mcu #marvel

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noctumbra · 2 years

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DISCLAIMER

─ almost all the works linked below are +18. please read the warnings before you read the fic. i won’t be accepting any accusations about the topic i wrote because you skipped the warnings. the fics linked below might include dark fics.

─ to get notified for fic updated only, turn on the notifications on for @cuddlewrites. i will be reblogging only the work i post on here.

─ i only write for bucky barnes, and rarely a couple other sebastian stan characters.

─ main masterlist

》 honey baby: ceo!bucky wants to have some fun during an online meeting.

》 kitten: dom!bucky reminds you your place.

》 bloody: bucky loves watching you carry his marks, so he gives you some.

》 angel face: some drunk shenanigans happen. the next day brings sober confessions with it.

》 unexpected relief: bucky writes a website’s name wrong, but he’s not unhappy with the results.

》 pleasure: daddy!bucky needs to relax, and you’re there to help him.

》 wicked tongue: you have a one night stand with a very handsome, older guy and you get surprised at the end.

》 what you need: you need money and your roommate is there to help you in every way.

》 intentional: alpha!bucky sends you a shirtless pic and then offers to spend your heat with him. feelings ensue.

》 abyss: hades!bucky falls in love with you in the first sight.

》 pour some sugar on me: rockstar!bucky sees you in the crowd and wants to get to know you. natasha helps him.

》 fade out: serialkiller!bucky thinks he was created to make wrongs right, and that’s exactly what he does to you.

》 pretty: bartender!bucky flirts with you, and you end up in an alley next to the bar he works in.

》 been like this: mob!bucky is possessive and makes sure you’re owned and bred.

》 i was made for lovin’ you: rockstar!bucky wants another baby, and you indulge him into his wish.

》 for your love: tfatws!bucky reminiscing his times with his soulmate. his family is there to support him.

》 the knowing: watching your soulmate have a life with someone other than you hurts way more than one can imagine.

》 vanilla: without knowing, you slept with your dad’s best friend who happened to be the best smelling alpha.

》 hush baby: crushing on your best friend and learning that he was crushing on you back had come with a package, and you couldn’t be happier and hornier.

》 let the feeling come take you: you come across to this rockstar at the bar and your life changes from there.

》 wildfire: you connect with a beautiful man on the beach, and things progress from there.

》 underworld: a demon finds you being lonely in his bar and decides that you need a good time.

》 red flags and long nights: three months isn’t long enough to get to know someone, especially if that person had different... tastes.

》 freak in the sheets: dilf!bucky is a flirts and he knows what he wants: you. thankfully, you want him back.

》 baby it’s you: omega!bucky has finally found his potential mate through beyoncé songs.

》 snatch my soul: ceo!nick finds a different way to make you forgive him about something that was not real.

》 supermodel: rockstar!bucky wants to make things right after his big fuck up in the past.

》 touch my soul from outside: dadsbestfriend!bucky knows exactly how to love on you.

》 i wanna be yours: rockstar!bucky loves and cherishes you to the point of annoying his best friend who happnes to be your brother.

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logicheartsoul · 7 months

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This meta has been a few years coming, but recently inspired due to: 1) Sian (@siancore) mentioning and incorporating into her amazing fic End of the World the moment that this meta is about, and 2) talking to Mexi (@thatmexisaurusrex) about this and then when she made that "share your fave sambucky moments that are canon" post, I knew this needed to finally been written and have its own proper post.

(Also, to @elektraking who wanted to be pinged when I finally wrote this, I finally did it!)

This post is long and image heavy but I didn't want to put it all under a read more.

We all know this scene from Infinity War, it's been all over people's dashes and giffed and etc etc. We also know it's a pretty quick scene, not necessarily a blink and you miss it one, but because it moves pretty quickly. If you're not paying too much attention to everyone else in the background, things will slip by.

However, watching things in 4K can really make things interesting because 1) you can zoom in and 2) you can zoom in and see some pretty clear detail, like the fact Sam and Bucky are looking at each other during this entire scene.

You can see here that everyone present except Sam isn't really watching Steve and Bucky interact -- either they're blocked from of the camera (Rhodey, Ayo, Bruce) or they're not looking at them (Nat has her eyes closed, T'Challa is looking at the side).

Sam is clearly in Bucky's line of sight, even if Bucky is looking at Steve (because we know Steve is moving closer to him and is about to talk to him)

On zoom in, we can see Sam is not zoned out, this is a very focused look at what is happening in front of him.

The next moment is where Steve goes in for the hug, but during this hug, a couple of things happen: 1) Sam moves closer towards them a bit, 2) he and Bucky actually DO stare at each other over Steve's shoulder

And for more than a few moments. Sort of significant if you think about the fact that Sam and Bucky seem to communicate a lot with nonverbal looks between each other. (We see this a few times in Civil War, and then later in this movie, but that will be even more apparent as fact in Endgame and, of course, TFATWS.)

And perhaps this could be passed off as "looking at each other coz we're looking in the same direction" except for the fact that Bucky makes a deliberate look at Sam when we get the pan over to his face.

When Steve backs away from the hug, we see Sam is still looking at Bucky, so we can assume during the entire exchange when the camera goes towards Bucky, Sam is still doing that.

Which leads us to when the camera pans over to Bucky.

(Yeah, yeah the cropping on this is kinda weird for me, but I wanted to make sure you could see his face.)

Steve proceeds to ask Bucky how he's doing. And of course, Bucky gives some kind of cutesy quip that fills space and time before going to the next big plot thing.

It's very interesting that Bucky pauses right after saying "uh, not bad", but as indicated by the arrow I put in the gif, he's staring in the exact direction where Sam would be. Because if you notice in the screenshots before this moment, above, when Bucky and Steve break away from the hug, Sam is in Bucky's line of sight but somewhat to the side, the same direction as the glance in the gif.

Now, as we know, the others are barely watching Steve and Bucky's interaction except Sam, who's still watching with focused attention.

If you were standing where Sam is standing, watching all of this, hearing Steve asking Bucky, "how's it going" and he responds "uh, not bad," and pauses WHILE looking at a glance in your direction, most people would consider that a moment.

And why wouldn't it be a moment? No one else is paying attention to Bucky or Steve except Sam. Bucky and Sam have before this comment were looking at each other when Steve brings in Bucky to a hug. Hell, Bucky could have just said "for the end of the world" without looking sideways and the scene would've worked as intended.

Yet, he gives that glance, and has a smile as he says, "not bad". While looking at Sam. It's so quick, yet it says so much. And considering how we know it's canon for them to be able to speak volumes by just sharing glances at each other (hello Sam looking at Bucky during Endgame), why wouldn't that apply here too? Because the glance wasn't really needed if you think about it.

And of course, Bucky deflects with his "for the end of the world" coz 1) he doesn't want Steve to try to make more small talk and 2) world ending shit is happening, they do NOT have time to stand around, they need to coordinate and they're on a time table. Because we all know Steve, he would want to know the reason why Bucky is actually smiling probably one of the first genuine smiles he's given on screen since TWS.

Anyway, we all know the rest: the plot moves forward, Sam and Bucky end up standing close to each other to witness Thanos' forces trying to get through Wakanda's shields, and then they end up being blipped.

Still, while a short, quick moment, on closer inspection, a lot can be said. Another in a line of Sam and Bucky's "saying things with a look" moments, but an underappreciated one.

#mcu #sambucky #meta #gif #my gifs #my meta #long post #lmao photoshop died on me while making gifs for this post and i had to restart my laptop 😂#anyways i hope y'all enjoyed this post i have been meaning to write it for FOREVER but it's here so lmao

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myfictionaldreams · 1 year

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Day 23: Hate Fucking - Helmut Zemo

Kinktober Day 23: Hate Fucking - Helmut Zemo x f!reader

Tags: 18+ readers only, smut, set during tfatws, enemies to fuck buddies, making out, quickie, wall sex, biting, marking, size kink, kitchen sex, creampie, nicknames, no use of y/n

my main masterlist 📚 // kinktober masterlist😈 // AO3 Link

His presence had been a pain in your ass for the entire mission. In fact, you couldn’t help but complain about him constantly since the second Bucky had broken him out of prison, nearly walking away from the entire situation as Zemo strolled through the door.

A small part of you understood why he was needed but by god, he was making it difficult with his condescending, manipulative, self-righteous arrogance constantly being a thorn in your side, there was only so far you could be pushed.

“You’re not leaving me with him!” you argued, trying to block the exit.

“Sorry kid, you know we need someone to keep an eye on him” Bucky tried to reason, sighing as you wouldn’t move out of his way.

“Then I’ll go with Sam! Just don’t leave me with him, I can’t be held accountable for my actions if I’m left alone with him” you tried to bargain but you knew it was a waste of time.

“I also do not need a babysitter James” Zemo pipped up from where he sat reading his book, lounging on the couch.

You and Bucky gave him a pointed look, he did of course need someone looking after him, he was a fugitive after all.

“Listen, we won’t be away for long, just sit a few feet away from each other and you’ll be fine” Bucky squeezed your shoulder once more gently moving you away from the door, walking out without looking back, not giving you the chance to argue back.

Turning on the spot you began to open your mouth to argue with Sam but he gave you a sympathetic smile, “sorry kid, we won’t be long, try not to kill each other until we’re back”. He too left, locking the door behind him leaving you alone with Helmut who didn’t seem phased by the situation but you knew he was just as angered as you were.

You weren’t subtle with your movements, stomping with heavy feet over to the armchair, not caring that you looked childish in any way, fed up that you were being left behind once again in the mission to do the job that held no value.

Scrolling through your phone, you become easily lost in tik toks, helping the time to pass and trying not to laugh as each video scrolled by, trying to keep the scowl on your face just in case Zemo looked over, not quite caring in the pettiness you were displaying.

A sudden movement out of the corner of your peripheral vision had you sitting bolt upright, reaching for the gun that was strapped tightly to the holster of your thigh, pointing it in Zemo’s direction as he gently stood.

Lazily holding his hands up, he continued walking, not phased at all by your threat. “Easy dragă, I’m just going to use the bathroom”. Taking a second to determine whether you believed him, you finally relaxed your stance.

“Don’t call me that” you mumbled, slotting the gun back into its place and watching with keen eyes as he moved to the bathroom, locking the door behind him.

Your eyes then shifted towards your phone timer, watching as it ticked by, with each passing minute, your stomach churned in anticipation. When it had officially been 10 minutes, you were striding towards the door, banging heavily against the wood with your fist.

Zemo opened the door instantly, a smirk teasing you on his face like he had been waiting for you to do this, testing to see how long it would take you.

“I’m not going anywhere dragă, you really need to relax” the Baron leant against the doorframe, crossing his arms as his eyes travelled up and down your form.

“Not so easy to do with such an arrogant prick in the room”.

Helmut’s smirk shifted to a smile, “you seem awfully pent up”.

The way he was staring at you had your insides twisting but you weren’t sure in what way, feeling unnerved you began to step away, muttering, “whatever Helmut”. However, a firm grip around your arm stopped your movements, spinning you back to look at the Baron. “If you don’t remove yourself from my arm, you’re a dead man Zemo”.

One thing you should have accounted for was his training, forgetting momentarily, not having enough time to dig your heels into the carpet as he was able to shove you back into a nearby wall, lungs being winded by the impact. “What the fuck-”

He was quick, quicker than you had expected him to be as he was able both disarm you, the gun now skidding across the floor, and your arms being pinned to your side.

“No more talking from you” his voice was low, not aggressive like you’d expected it to be compared to his actions, instead it was laced with something you couldn’t quite pinpoint. You tried to squeeze out of his grip, knees lifting to kick him but he leaned his weight heavily over you, leaving you momentarily defenceless.

It also meant that he was so close to your face that you could smell his expensive aftershave, citrusy with a hint of smoke. “Why do you fight me so much dragă?”

His question threw you through a loop, confusion settling across your expression, eyes dropping to watch his lips as he spoke but that was only due to the close proximity. “You know why I hate you Zemo, that’s no fucking reason to slam me against the wall”.

Helmut chuckled darkly, his own eyes searching over your face, “oh I have every reason to slam you into the wall dragă”. Before your brain could overthink his works, and understand the connotations behind his emphasis, Zemo dipped his head, lips lazily connecting with yours.

Initially, you were too shocked to turn your face away, eyes wide as you could feel the scratch of his facial hair against the softness of your cheeks. The man holding you close shifted back an inch, eyes darting between yours trying to gauge your reaction.

You couldn’t even think, not with your head anyway as a deep ache began to radiate between your legs so as his face hovered close to yours, you moved first.

The kiss was chaotic, with no rhythme just licking, pulling lips with teeth, both trying to frantically kiss the other harder, not being able to move quick enough, heads tilting from side to side as his hands finally released their grip on your arms, giving you the freedom, to pull his jumper, chest bumping harder against yours.

You’d not even realised just how pent up you truly were as a strong thigh pushed between your legs leaving your cunt grinding down on the muscle, mouth opening in a quick gasp before it was swallowed up by Helmut’s tongue dancing with your own.

Zemo seemed to be moving with just as much passion and ferocity as his hands dropped to the zipper of your jeans, you wanted this, want to get rid of some of that tension before you exploded. Releasing the grip on his jumper, your hands mirrored his, gripping his belt and hastily undoing it but not as smoothly as his, your hands trembling slightly from the adrenaline.

“Fuck” you grunted as your jeans were harshly pulled down with your underwear to your knees and before you could do the same to him, your body was being turned, face now being pushed up against the cool wall, hips being jutted out slightly.

“Hurry up” he couldn’t have moved any quicker if he tried as he pulled out his cock, you couldn’t even see it over your shoulder from the positioning, only realising he had even released himself when his lips attached to your ear lobe and the hard press of his tip moved against your cunt.

Zemo swears as he feels how wet you are, only taking a second to compose himself before tilting his hips up. He was bigger than you had expected, your pussy trembling with the stretch as inch after inch delved deeper. He was moving too slow so with a grunt you pushed your hips backwards, taking the remainder of his cock causing you both to shudder, you felt so full but you still needed more.

It seemed that Helmut was experiencing as much urgency as he began to fuck you hard, his hand disappearing into your head, tugging back your head to expose your neck giving him the perfect opportunity to bite the junction between neck and shoulder.

“Ah! Don’t fucking mark me you possessive freak” he chuckled, licking over the spot that he had just bit to soothe the skin before putting all of his energy to thrust deeper and harder, your face aching from the impact of your body being pushed forward but you didn’t care, finding some sick joy in the mixture of pleasure and pain.

His lips were back teasing the shell of your ear, “you should stop fighting me all the time, we could have such great fun”.

“Shut up and fuck me, Zemo”.

Saying his name seemed to snap something within him, his cock pulling all the way out leaving you feeling oddly empty before he was dragging you over the island in the middle of the kitchen, not without its difficulties with your jeans halfway down your legs.

Just as you felt like you were about to fall on your face, you found yourself being pushed until your front was against the marble countertop and before you could react, Zemo was fucking you again. His grip on your hips was harsh enough that you knew they would be bruises later but you didn’t care, mouth gaping open releasing a steady stream of moans.

His thrusts were hitting you so deep, stroking against all of the beautiful spots within, your juices coating him, causing each thrust to squelch. You felt it now, Zemo moving so quickly that you didn’t have time to dwell in that blissful build-up, it was simply just there tight and arousing and then you were cuming, hard, walls fluttering around his cock.

The tight grip your cunt had on him was nearly overwhelming for the Baron as his thrusts faltered and he too was cuming, coating you with every ounce of cum that he had in his tightened balls. His seed spilt out of you, dripping down your thighs as he all but collapse against your back.

It didn’t take long for him to recover, however, silently easing his cock out and walking away without another word but you were fine with that, rushing to the bathroom to clean yourself. It also took longer than you expected as you had to wash your face repeatedly to try and get the glazed “I’ve just been fucked” expression off of your face.

Re-entering the main room, you noted that Zemo had returned to the couch, reading the same book as before acting like nothing had even happened so you sat as well, trying not to glance at him every few seconds, mind both overthinking and blank at the same time, the only sign that something had actually happened was the slight pulsing still tingling in your cunt.

Only a few moments later the front door was unlocking, and Sam and Bucky returned from wherever they had visited.

“Good to see you two haven’t killed each other” Bucky commented, dropping into the chair adjacent to yours.

“I can be good sometimes, Barnes” you retorted, noticing the slight smirk on Zemo’s lips.

#helmut zemo #helmut zemo smut #helmut zemo x reader #helmut zemo imagine #marvel smut #marvel one shot #kinktober 2022 #kinktober #mine*

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eunoiaastralwings · 5 months

Text

Effects of a Truth Serum

featuring bucky x girlfriend!reader

fandom mcu- tfatws era

a/n dont ask me why i just did - it was a crack idea that got out off hand

warnings crack fic, fluff. innuendo (?) - SMUG BUCKY IS A WARNING. illusion into smut. and before you read just know am dyslexic. also the reader lowkey became my oc again. . . oop

You cover your mouth as you tried not to laugh as her boyfriend – who managed to get injected with the truth serum while they were trying to stop a few the flag smashers.

“you poor poor thing. . .”

You tease Bucky seeing how he looked annoyed and grumpy as he sat across from her – he was definitely mad at himself.

Bucky looks up at you.

Despite being under the influence of the Truth Serum – he’s annoyed by his girlfriend’s teasing and playful nature.

He doesn’t say anything – but the annoyed expression plastered on his face is clear enough.

You grins at your grumpy looking boyfriend.

“How you feeling, sergeant?”

You teased him cutely.

Bucky raises his eyebrow a little, slightly irritated by your continued teasing.

He finally breaks his silence.

“I feel. . . cranked; weird. This stuff’s really messing with my head.”

He looks at you – his expression slightly softer now but still slightly annoyed.

You sighed – gently holding his hand caressing it knowing he hated things that messed with his head or mind.

Bucky’s eyes follow your hand as you hold his.

His grip tightens slightly as you rub his hand. After a moment – his expression softens a little but his annoyance with the truth serum still hasn’t subsided.

Then you smirk – seemingly have very bright idea as she looked back up at your boyfriend holding back a huge mischievous grin.

Bucky watches you as you look up at him. He raises an eyebrow in curiosity, clearly wondering what exactly she’s planning.

“So. . .I just realized, I can ask you any question I want.”

You snickered.

Bucky doesn’t say anything at first.

He watches you and your mischievous grin with growing suspicion and curiosity – knowing exactly where this is leading. After a moment, he responds.

“I suppose you could. . .”

You smirked and leaned back crossing her arms thinking of the perfect questions.

As you lean back and thinks of the perfect questions to ask him, Bucky’s curiosity grows and he leans forward slightly – his eyes locked on you.

“How many women have actually been with back in the 40s!”

You instantly blurts out asking him – knowing he was quite the ladies man.

He raises his eyebrows and looks at you, and then he can’t help but let out a chuckle.

“I don't know the exact number. . .but more than you can count on two hands. . .and more. . .”

He shrugs his shoulders – still smirking.

Your jaw dropped “James. Buchanan. Barnes!”

“It doesn’t count if it was in war time!”

He mutters as if it were a valid excuse.

“Oh, of course, you probably slept with every nurse in the camp, didn’t you?”

You rolled your eyes at him.

“Not every nurse.”

He chuckles.

“But. . .I think. . .a lot of them. Yeah. . .”

He says thinking – causing you to raise an eyebrow at him.

“I was lonely, okay? And, I was young. And. . . hormonal.”

He shrugs again.

You smirk as the truth serum causes Bucky to say more of the truths.

Bucky clears his throat looking away – seemingly trying to keep himself shut; a faint blush from embarrassment on his cheeks.

“Right then. . .Hmm. . .”

You leaned back thinking of questions.

He waits patiently - or, as patiently as he can. The truth serum is doing its so-called magic.

Then she smirks again.

“When, how and where did you lose your virginity?”

His eyes widen.

“Jesus Christ. . .”

Bucky sighs and looks at you.

“You are making me answer everything, aren’t you?”

He’s slightly nervous – but doesn’t deny what he had just said.

You only smirk at your boyfriend.

“You know about mine”

You said.

“Yeah! Because I’m the one that took it! – I hate you right now!”

He rolls his eyes, but the smirk never leaves his face.

You only smirk as you watch him fight against the truth serum.

Bucky tries to hold it back – shutting his eyes but it was forced out.

“You’re evil”

Bucky laughs, slightly annoyed. But he doesn't lie to answer the question.

“The first time was in a bar. . .with a random waitress. . . in the back of the kitchen. . .Or back alleyway. I don’t even remember.”

He shrugs – “I was young and stupid.”

You just blink at him

“Wow. . .”

You whispered.

“What? You thought I was always a saint?”

He laughs lightly.

“I wasn’t always Winter Soldier, doll.”

“Come on. We were soldiers, back in the 40s. It was practically guaranteed to hook-up with other soldiers.”

Bucky smirks at the memory – “It was fun, I can't deny it.”

“Funny, how you can remember all that but not anything else!”

You narrowed your eyes at your boyfriend.

“I remember. . .certain parts of my time in the 40s.”

He looks back at her, smirking.

“I remember the women” He chuckles. – “It was one of the perks of being a soldier, back then.”

“Do you have a death wish?”

She asked her boyfriend – growing a little jealous now.

“Don’t start, doll”.

He says, knowing he’s in trouble. – “Relax.”

He looks into your eyes again – “It was a lifetime ago, honey. I’m all yours now.”

But you still had your eyes narrowed.

“Y/N. . .”

Bucky sighs – still looking into your eyes.

“I’m in love with you. It’s been years since I’ve even spoken of any of the women from my past. Can’t we just move on?”

He tries to smile in a reassuring way.

“I’m your only one. All the other women from my past. . .”

He chuckles to himself.

“They’re all just a distant memory at this point.”

Bucky says – gently tries to coax you into his arms again.

“Promise?”

You asked – as you reluctantly lets yourself be pulled into his arms.

“Always, doll.”

He smiles and wraps his arms around you.

“Just trust me, Y/N. I’m yours. . .and only yours.”

He gently leans in to kiss him.

You smile and softly kiss him back.

It wasn’t long before Bucky placed your back against the mattress too.

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