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jisungparker · 2 years

Text

Let’s hope the sun will show us the path

pairing: lee minho x fem!reader

song: lorde - the path

themes: angst, fluff, smut (warnings below)

snippet: Minho commits your body to memory, your breaths, your touch, saved for a time he never knew he would need it for. A time when you’re no longer love’s provider, but forsaker. Minho never found the sentiment in intimacy until he began making love to you, praying you might find something worth staying for. 7.5k

warnings: just very light fluffy-angsty-break up-emo seggz, exhibitionism (no one’s around), nipple play, fingering (f receiving), piv, crying during seggz, pet names (baby, dummy(?)) established relationship, coming of age vibes, break-up

a/n: i'm 10k words into another minho fic and kept putting this off because it's sad but i hope you enjoy (be who you wanna be barbie girl here, i hope the sun shows you the path.. and any warnings i may have missed <3)

“Can I ask you something?” Jisung says out of nowhere, digging around for the controller, his eyes still glued to the tiny television screen. When he lowers the volume, he swallows his mouth full of chips before warning you- “It's kind of- I mean it could feel kind of personal.”

It might be the most Jisung does today, you think before you tell him- “go on,” watching the fan creak as it turns towards you before slowly rotating Jisung’s way again. It’s the peak of summer, maybe the hottest day of the year so far. It also happens to be the exact same day you have to spend wasting away in your grandparents’ insulated basement. After a stretched silence, you turn to find Jisung staring at you. “What?”

“Are you sure?”

“I said go ahead.”

“No, I mean-” rethinking it, he turns his attention back to the screen. It's an old Golden Girls rerun you know he has seen because it was on when he walked in about three hours ago. Jumping when you lob a stray cushion at him, he glares at you when you raise your brow in silent question. “Don’t get mad.”

“I won't,” you lie, though you’re sure he’s just exaggerating.

“Are you.. sure sure about moving?”

“Not much of a choice at this point,” you laugh, waving an open hand towards the large room of half empty boxes you were both meant to spend the day filling. With a bit too much haste, you drop down beside him, focusing on the same tiny screen, itchy under Jisung’s thoughtful gaze. “Why? Finally figured out you can’t live without me?”

“No, I already knew that,” peeling himself off the couch to readjust, he pouts- “I’m actually in the process of typing out my will.”

“Can I have all your Crocs?”

“Deal.” Shaking on it, he keeps hold of your hand, hoping you ignore the clamminess it greets you with. “But seriously. And this is the personal bit.. What about you and Minho?”

“What about us?”

“Well,” he huffs, not sure how to continue. “I mean, you guys are like, in love.” When you just nod, with a bit more nonchalance than you intended, he slumps, releasing your hand. It’s then you realise that maybe he had held it for moral support. Something you evidently didn’t need. “Then why..” You feel a little concerned for Jisung. For someone usually so sure of himself, you’d think his words would at least meet him halfway. “Why aren’t you sadder?”

You get up suddenly, finally deciding it’s time to crank the fan up a few dials, stopping on your way back to the couch to slide some unpacked records into a box marked fragile. You twirl one between your pointer fingers, the corners digging into the pads as you eye a recommendation from the man Jisung speaks of. He had heard it on his drive home one night, and thought of you. Not usually so affectionate, you listened carefully when he said he often thought of you when listening to music, listening to the wind, the passing cars, laughter. You take care when sliding the record into the box before collapsing again beside Jisung.

“I never planned on living here longer than a few months, Ji,” you admit, or remind - unsure whether Jisung ever knew it to begin with. “I can’t live in my grandparent’s basement forever.”

“I dunno. I saw your grandpa before he left, he seemed gutted that you’re leaving.”

“Who isn’t?”

“Y/N.” You’re stunned by the stern look he gives you, the rest of it seeping into his tone. “I just want to make sure you’re sure. I mean, you have a whole life here.”

“I know,” you sigh, smiling at him, forcing the mockery out of it. You do appreciate his concern, truly, but you always knew this day would come. And you had already gone this long without crying, you don’t want it to psych you out. “I guess I always had it in my head that I’d be leaving. Minho knew too.”

“I get that, but do you have to move so far away?”

“Yes.”

“Y/N….” Jisung whines, his bottom lip jutting out. “What’s so special about London? We have everything London has!”

“Hmm, like what?”

“Um, like a river.. and trees.. and rain-” his list continues as your phone lights up, a call coming through. “We also have way cooler clocks-”

“Hello?”

“Hey,” his voice seeps through the receiver so cooly, you almost shiver. In this heat, you almost beg him to continue before he reads your mind, obliging. “How you getting on? You guys almost done?”

“Yeah, almost,” you lie, rolling your eyes at Jisung who hits your arm. “Jisung has been zero help by the way, so thanks for that.”

“Don’t start. You know I’d rather be there than here.” Here, being his family’s restaurant downtown. “See you getting all hot and bothered packing up those boxes-”

“Don’t be gross,” you warn, glaring at Jisung who wretches, blatantly listening in. “I’m just saying, you couldn’t get someone with even a drop of motivation?”

“You think I didn’t try? You know I had to bribe that fucker? Put him on the phone.”

“Say please.”

“Now.”

“It’s for you.”

Jisung gulps before taking the phone, giving you a second to eye the mess of a life you have yet to pack away. The first thing you see is the collection of plushies piled atop your bed. You had considered giving some, if not most away, keeping the ones which meant the most to you. Like one Minho won at last summer’s fayre, or Felix won in an Ebay auction for you. After a long game of this or that however, Minho watched as you piled nearly every stuffed animal in the keep pile. Next was your dresser, some drawers empty, most of your winter clothes already packed away. The remainder were for your last few weeks here, those coming to a quick end as your departure quickly crept in. You pass a familiar pale yellow number between your fingers, stretching the ruched waist of the playsuit in your hands as you recall how it ended up on the floor. Minho had thrown it here. You had been wearing it shortly before.

Jisung calls your name just as you begin poking through your jewellery box, eyeing your promise ring which glittered as soon as you lifted the lid.

“It’s for you, you snake.” Shoving the phone in your open hand, Jisung begins chucking your random knick knacks in a random box, mumbling about them all breaking on transit.

“What did you say to him?”

“Does it matter?”

“Well, if he breaks my shit it will.”

“What are you doing tonight?” He asks, ignoring your empty threat. “Wanna take you somewhere.”

“Where?”

“Somewhere. Are you busy, yes or no?”

“No.”

“I’ll pick you up at nine.”

The phone beeps and you sigh, throwing it on the unoccupied couch before looking for Jisung, finding him bubble wrapping your ceramic three-headed cat. “What did he say to you?”

“‘Get up you lazy fuck or I’m cashing in on all those free meals. Don’t make me drive there and break those twiddily, dumb dumb, twig legs of yours’.” When you raise a brow, he shrugs, placing a stray ashtray in the heaving box. “Or something like that.”

“Did he mention where he wants to take me later?”

“No.” He obviously lies, “and if he did, I wouldn’t tell you.”

“Fine, whatever.” When you pout digging through your last lot of clean clothes, he sighs and takes mercy on you.

“If it helps-” You’re certain it won’t, but you listen anyway. “Minho would love you in anything.”

You were only kind of right.

With no intentions to overstay, two summers ago, you moved into your grandparents’ place. Fueled by childhood nostalgia, free rent and a melancholic bout of wanderlust, you packed up and headed to the coastal town with dreams of summer nights spent picking sand out of your hair, skin smoothed out by salt water and running home barefoot.

Somehow you forgot how most of these memories relied on the same childlike wonder you dreamed them up with. Adults don’t just run up to other adults on the beach. They don’t get forced into sleepovers with their grandparents’ friend’s grandkids. They don’t mingle. Not really.

After two weeks of the same dull routine - pinning and then repinning photos from the city you had happily deserted, of the friends you’d gladly left behind; of arranging, then quickly rearranging the old couch and television around the space you now call yours; of the same four, primed and unpainted walls - you started to think maybe moving was a mistake.

That night, your grandma had dragged your grandpa to a retirement party uptown for the neighbour of a friend’s cousin’s best friend.. the connection didn’t matter. What did matter, was how much it annoyed you that the retired couple seemed to have more friends, and thus more of a social life than you did.

It also annoyed you that your grandma seemed to realise this too.

After two weeks of sleeping on a mattress they’d picked up for you the day you landed, on the floor of your grandparents’ basement, your grandma had had enough. At breakfast, she announced she had asked a friend to get their grandson to come round and drop a bed frame for you.

Ignoring your refusal, she continued, ‘He’s a nice boy, a bit quiet. Handsome though.’

Of course, she failed to explain just how handsome.

After your grandpa’s famous pancakes, you tried to forget all about it because you felt bad. This guy was probably annoyed that he got roped into playing delivery boy on a Saturday night for a random friend of his grandpa. Which is why you think nothing of it when he doesn’t show up when your grandma said he would. You already had a mattress, bedding, and pillows. You weren’t even sure you had the energy or knowhow to set up a bed anyway. The guy would be doing you a favour if he didn’t show up. So when you get into your pyjamas after ordering yourself a large pizza and cracking open a bottle of your grandpa’s beer, you were unphased when the bell to the basement door rang.

“One sec!” Rushing for your purse, you shoved your beer on an empty shelf before swinging the door open. Poking around for cash, you cursed under your breath. “This is so shitty of me, but do you have change for a fifty?”

“No.” Looking up, you had to stop yourself taking a literal step back when you were met with possibly the finest pizza boy you think you would ever lay eyes on. He’s dressed nothing like one. He’s in all black, from his leather jacket and fitted t-shirt, to his skin tight jeans and lace up boots. Even his chain is black, the black stones contrasted by the warm glow of his tanned skin. Skin which stretched perfectly over pure muscle and bone, body carved to near perfection. After a few seconds of silence, seconds he had just spent staring back at you, with his face blank he asked, “You Y/N?”

“Yeah?”

“Come and give me a hand with this.” When he didn’t hear you behind him, he stopped halfway up the cobbled steps, frowning before he asked, “Do you want this bed or not?”

“Oh.” You had figured out he wasn’t the pizza guy, but what you couldn’t figure out was how your grandma had called this man ‘handsome’. Especially in passing. Slipping on some shoes, you follow him up the steps to his 1979 Supra, the exterior matching his exterior perfectly. “Nice car.”

“Thanks.” Opening the door, he reached into the backseat, pulling a few panels of varnished wood out before handing some to you. “Let’s hope this thing hasn’t scuffed it up.”

You thought you should say something, maybe even apologise. But you couldn’t because all you could think was ‘handsome’.

Grabbing a few more panels, he stood beside you, waiting for you to lead the way. “So, we just gonna stand here or..”

“Uh, right.”

Without another word, you head back to the basement, trying not to show your struggle. You reckon you’re doing okay but that could be because you can’t hear your breaths over the sound of your heart beating. ‘Handsome though’. Some warning would have been nice. When you finally made it back, you placed them down as quickly as you could, rubbing your palms where the wood had begun to pinch. Turning, you found him watching you.

“You good?” You could see a smirk somewhere in that squint, the absence of concern grating at you. “Should’ve said you couldn’t handle it, I’d have done it myself.”

“Who said I couldn’t handle it?” You weren’t sure where the need to impress this stranger had come from, but it did, and it was potent. “I’ll go get the rest.”

“Let me-”

“No, I insist.” As you ran back up the steps, you saw the all too familiar tomato red you had been expecting. But now you were at a crossroads. Either run back down, pay for the pizza, and risk the fine stranger thinking you couldn’t handle yourself. Or have a second member in the audience of your embarrassment. You settled for the latter, cringing as you descended the steps, finding the two talking, seeming familiar with one another. Dropping the planks, you rushed for your purse. “Sorry about that. You don’t happen to have change-”

“No worries, Minho’s covered it.” The pizza boy insisted, nodding his head towards who you now know as Minho. Nice name, you thought. Nice name, nice car, nice face. When the pizza boy turned to you, his grin gave you pause. No one could love their job that much. “You must be Y/N, your grandma always talks about you.”

“Oh,” you imagined she would, it’s what old people do: talk about their kids and grandkids. It would typically make you shy, but the idea that she had mentioned you to these two made you wonder whether you should’ve encouraged the habit. “Yeah, that’s me. Sorry, I don’t know your name..”

“Felix. I’m Minho’s cousin.” Fuck, good looks run in the family. “We actually met when we were kids. You probably don’t recognise me without my braces, or Minho without his lisp-”

“Hey Lix, don’t you have to go clock out?”

“Shit, yeah!” Handing you your order, Felix waved as he ascended the cobbled stairs backwards, yelling, “Oi, the party starts at ten. Bring Y/N!”

And then he’d gone, left you standing there with Minho and a new bit of information to process. One, you now had to offer some of your pizza to Minho. Two, the pizza boy is Minho’s cousin, Felix. Three, Felix remembered you.. did Minho remember you too?

As you were thinking, clinging to the pizza box for dear life, you noticed Minho removing his jacket, slinging it over the back of the couch before grabbing a tool box out of a random cupboard. It would surprise you that he knew his way around the still unfamiliar room, but your grandma did mention Minho helped out around the house a lot, especially since your grandpa’s surgery a few years prior.

What did surprise you, is that he was about to start assembling your bed frame.

“Don’t you have to go soon? It’s almost ten.”

“No one goes to a party on time.” He said, as if it had been so obvious. Reaching for a hammer and nails, he turned to find you still hovering behind him. Dragging his eyes up the length of you, from your sock clad feet, over your faded t-shirt, all the way up to your eyes before asking- “Shouldn’t you be getting ready?”

“For what?”

“The party?” From the look he gave you, you could tell he was still unsure whether you were being purposely obtuse or not. “You know, the one at ten?”

“Oh,” he stared when you frowned, visibly annoyed by his tone. “I thought he was just being polite.”

“Felix doesn’t do that,” suddenly whacking the nail into the frame, the sound cutting through you when he added, “Come. If you don’t, he’ll tell my grandpa I left you here.”

“I’m busy tonight.”

“Hm,” laughing through his nose, Minho eyed the shelf behind you. “Doing what? Drinking warm beer?”

Your eyes followed his to the abandoned beer on the side, the sweaty bottles on the floor. “And eating pizza.”

“What pizza?” He yelled over the pound of the hammer, stopping to check his work. “Pretty sure that’s mine.”

“No, it’s not.”

“I paid for it.”

“I didn’t ask you to!”

“Well, it’s done now.” He shrugged, smoothing his palm over a freshly hammered nail. “So you not only have no pizza, but no plans.” He watched you place down the pizza just to cross your arms, unimpressed by his lame assessment. “Listen, it’s just a bunch of our friends. You’ve met some of them.”

“Yeah, like fifteen years ago.”

“So lots to catch up on then,” he nodded, hammering a nail with a bite of his lip. When you don’t move, he sighed- “Fine. Look, if you hate it I’ll drive us somewhere.”

“Where?”

“Somewhere. Go change.”

He’s an hour late this time too. You know to expect it after two years of the same routine, except this time you’re ready, and he still says the same thing.

“Go change into what? You haven’t said where we’re going.”

“You just need more clothes than that.”

“To do..”

“What we’re going to do.”

“Which is..”

“Y/N.” Standing from the corner of your bed, he eyes his watch before remembering he was the one who was late. Looking up at you, he quickly swallows his exasperation. “Change.”

After a calming breath, you probe, “Do I need to be more modest?” You frown when he laughs, his eyes crinkling at the corners. He looks cute, you think. “What?”

“You think I’d take you somewhere you need to be modestly dressed?”

“Well,” you huff, frown deepening, “the first time I let you take me ‘somewhere’, I ended up half naked meeting your mom.”

“True. But that’s because we were at a pool party, then I took you to meet my cats. It’s not my fault she came home early.”

“The rest is your fault though.”

“Oh,” he snorts, turning to you. “So it’s my fault you gave out on the first date?”

“Just, give me a hint!”

Biting back a smirk, he sits back down, pulling you onto his lap. Stroking your knee, he concedes. “We’ll be outside. So cover up your legs because, you know, bugs and all that.”

“Oh,” you breathe, feeling his fingers stroke along the inside of your thigh. Squishing his cheeks, you offer a quick peck to his lips. “See, was that so hard?”

“Yeah, yeah. Come ‘ere,” with a roll of his eyes and a poke in your side, making you lean away from his touch, he manages to guide your lips to his. Laughing against your pout, Minho places tiny pecks on your lips, lulling your mouth open before sliding his tongue in.

A man of haste, over the past two years Minho has shown you he despises being kept waiting, satisfied only by immediate gratification, pleasure at his say so, pleasure now. But of late, it is as though your looming departure has thrown him off course, forcing him to reroute, reassess.

Now he kisses you slowly, making it meaningful in a way. He doesn’t take his pleasure, but quietly pleads for it, with low moans and soft whimpers. Minho commits your body to memory, your breaths, your touch, saved for a time he never knew he would need it for. A time when you’re no longer love’s provider, but forsaker.

Minho never found the sentiment in intimacy until he began making love to you, praying you might find something worth staying for.

“Go change,” he sighs, clearing his throat as the thought of you leaving seeps back in, staining what was meant to be a fun evening. “Then we’ll go.”

Apparently, ‘somewhere’ is the Seo family’s beach house at the edge of town. Miles down the road you can smell the ocean as it clings to the air, and though you can’t see it, you think you can hear it under the music blaring a few doors down.

With your hand in his, Minho leads you up the sand kissed street, happily walking at your slower pace. The ride up had been quiet, with only the radio and the hum of passing cars. His hand hadn’t left yours the whole way, his fingers toying with his ring on your middle finger.

“We don’t have to stay long,” he says after trying the door handle, looking at you. “Just gotta show our faces.”

“Okay.” After two years, it’s easy to decode Minho: he doesn’t want to stay long. “Who’s here?”

Banging the door with his closed fist, he shrugs- “The usual lot. They wanted to give you a final hurrah.” His eyes roll at your amusement before he clarifies. “Chan’s words, not mine.”

“There she is!” Felix yells as he appears from behind the front door, ears and cheeks tinged a bright pink. “Come in! You’re late! Drink this!” Shoving a tequila in your hand, he goes to pass you a margarita before Minho reaches for it, keeping hold of your other hand.

Two years ago, you wouldn’t recognise a soul in the room. Now, you couldn’t forget them. Hyunjin, drunk in the corner, refusing water from his sister who swore up and down she’d disown him the next time this happened. You learnt early on how weak Yeji was, evidenced by the same scene unfolding for the tenth time this summer alone. You wouldn’t have been able to pick Jisung’s lying ass up in a lineup, his sad eyes stuck to his final red solo cup which first time player Chan had just dunked his ping pong ball in. Nor Changbin, who clung to a keg he held with ease over Ryujin’s head, the other girls circling her as she chugged it with a similar ease.

Two years ago, these people meant nothing to you. Not them, and not the man beside you, squeezing your hand before taking your empty shot glass and handing you your cocktail, removing the umbrella to slide it behind your ear.

“You guys, come here for a sec.” Seungmin calls for you both from the back door of the kitchen. Following him out to the garden, you find him trying and failing to convince Felix not to swim the length of the pool. “Y/N, talk to him-”

“No, she’s on my side!” Felix proclaims, dragging you away from Minho. “We’ll race-” eyeing your flares, he backtracks slightly. “This is a pool party, you know?”

“No one said it was one.” You quip, glaring at Minho.

He just rolls his eyes. “It isn’t one, dummy.”

“Let him swim!” Jeongin cheers, enjoying everything from a nearby lounge chair.

“‘Lix,” Minho calls, grabbing his cousin by the shoulders. “Wasn’t there something you wanted to give Y/N?”

“Huh?” Looking up, Felix quickly searches his memory before gasping- “Oh! I almost forgot!”

“What is it?”

“A silicone mould of my dick,” Minho says, grabbing your hand before you can swing at his arm. “Come on.” Leading you back into the house, he takes you into the kitchen, clicking his tongue as he pours you a drink. “Don’t think it’ll be as easy to get you out of here as I thought.”

“Why don’t we just stay a bit?” Stopping midpour, he answers you with a hard glare, eyeing you incredulously. “What?”

“Y/N, you leave in a few days.”

“I know, Minho. But they did all this for me, how can I just leave?”

He’s tickled by that, finding a joke somewhere in there. With a shake of his head, you see he’s about to refuse when Chaeryeong bumps into him as she goes to hug you, knocking your half poured drink over the counter. “Chaeryoung, what the fuck?”

“It was an accident babe, let me wipe it-”

“Y/N!”

“One sec, Lix-”

“Just go.” Minho huffs, taking the rag from you. “You said you want to stay a bit, go.”

“What is your problem?”

“Y/N!”

“Go.” Minho repeats, offering you a tight lipped smile, before wiping up the spilt drink. “It’s not like I’m going anywhere.”

You eye him for a long second, before pushing off the counter. “Fine. Chaeryoung, let’s go.”

“Is he alright?”

“Who fucking knows.” You both enter the living room to find everyone gathered together. Even Hyunjin is a tad more present, nursing a cup of water. When you approach them, Felix extends his hand to reveal a little gift wrapped box. “What’s this?”

“What does it look like-”

“It’s a goodbye present.” Chan reveals, elbowing Changbin in the ribs. “From all of us.”

“Oh.” You know it’s dumb, not to expect anything. You have known them for over two long years now. Some even longer. And yet not ones did it ever cross your mind that you might mean enough to any of them to warrant such a thing. “Thank you.”

“Open it!” Yeji calls, hushing her brother who knows what it is when he asks what it is.

It’s a black chain, not too unlike the ones Minho usually wears. It sparkles even in the low light, dotted with tiny black stones, a plated pendant on the end. There’s a date etched into it. You recognise it immediately. It’s the date your grandma put her foot down, the date you got a proper bed. It’s the date you first left the house. The date you started making friends. The date this place started to feel like home. The date you finally felt like you belonged.

“It’s the date we all met you. Well, properly.” Felix whispers as you read the date over and over.

It’s the date you met Minho.

“Oh, she hates it!” Jisung whines, aghast at the tears welling in your eyes. “Well, it’s non refundable, babe. I checked. And it cost a fucking shit ton-”

“I love it.” You force out, smiling tearily at them all. “Thank you so much.”

“Don’t thank us.” Lia whispers, nodding her head behind you.

You turn in time to catch him glaring at her, his face unreadable when you look at him. “Glad you like it.”

“Put it on me?” He beckons you over, reaching for the box, eyeing you as he does. He frowns slightly at your tear stained cheek before tilting his head telling you to spin. Letting the pendant rest at the base of your throat, he fiddles with the clasp. You run your fingers over the etched metal, grinning tearily at them all as they smile sadly back at you. “How’s it look?”

They throw a gaggle of compliments at you, all impossibly sweet and partially impossible to hear. Before you can roll your eyes, Minho turns you back towards him, rubbing his thumbs over your cheeks.

“Perfect,” he mutters before pressing his lips to yours, pulling you in. He kisses you to the sound of jeers and coos before the music starts back up, the party continuing around you two. He feels you press yourself against him, tongue sliding into his mouth before he pulls away, eyes darting across your face. “Let’s go. We’ll come back.”

You two leave with zero opposition, back in his supra, doing eighty on the highway. His hand is wrapped firmly around your thigh, squeezing every time you hit a high note, his eyes crinkling when you laugh whenever he attempts the same. You can’t hear over the sound of the wind, the radio, and laughter. It’s so light, so natural. It’s moments like this you cling to, moments like this you pray never end.

But it seems they always do.

As he slows down, eyeing the signs for a turning he needs to take, he turns the music down too, raising up his window a bit.

“Hey.” When you stroke the back of his hand, he says- “Can I ask you something?”

You feel an odd sense of deja vu, when you tell him to go ahead.

“Are you sure about London?” The air thickens with silence, his hand squeezing your thigh again, looking over at you. Your eyes are glued to the highway, dizzied by the trees blurring into one. With a sigh and a firm squeeze back you admit-

“No,” laughing when you add, “Not at all.”

Minho expected as much. From your last minute packing, your discomfort whenever the rainy city is mentioned. He never really expected a straight answer though, especially given what you told Jisung. ““Then why? Why leave?”

“Because,” you sigh, clasping his hand between both of yours. “I felt the same before coming here.”

“What changed?”

“You.”

He chuckles at that. “So, what? You’re leaving to find a British Minho?”

“No, dummy. The opposite actually.” You feel him look at you, his hand tightening around yours in silent question. “I don’t know, I just- I came here for me, and I stayed for you.” You admit sheepishly, but when you look at him, you reckon he knew as much. “Which isn't even completely true, because I wanted to stay. I loved it here- I still love it here. But, I guess I don’t want to look back at my life and realise that I never kept any of the promises I made myself, you know? I don’t ever want to blame you for anything I didn’t do, not when you’ve only ever supported me. I guess I just don’t want to look back at us and feel anything except what I feel now. Does that make sense?”

It does. He doesn’t say anything though, only raises your hand to his lips, pressing them to the skin for a while.

The rest of the drive is spent like the drive up, instead you play with his rings this time, fiddling with them, sliding them up and down his outstretched fingers. He turns the music back up, resting his head on his seat, watching you every chance he gets. When you feel the car slow down, his blinkers going, you look ahead to where he turns into.

“‘The Yellow Wood’?” As he pulls up at the park’s entrance, he takes an off road turn, laughing when you quickly wind your window all the way up, leaning towards him as far away from the dark abyss as possible. “Minho, what is this place?”

“Some lookout point Changbin found hiking once time.” Turning onto a cliff side road, he slows to an almost stop as he drives up the bend. “Always wanted to bring you, just kept putting it off.”

“Why?”

“Dunno,” he shrugs with an odd smile. “Just thought we had more time.”

When the road ends, Minho pulls into a clearing with a view you couldn’t believe. A line of sparse trees, railings and a thick netting separate you from the edge of the cliff but it does little to obscure the view of the whole town below. You see the ocean you couldn’t before, hear the distinct chirp of crickets, the lit up houses hundreds of feet below you as you watch over them with a feeling of overwhelming omnipotence. Yellow lights weave between the bare branches, casting an ethereal, starry glow over the town.

Turning off his engine, Minho gestures at the infamous ‘somewhere’. “Thought it’d be nice if you got a whole picture of the town. You know, all at once.” When he turns to you, he sees your eyes water for the second time tonight. The yellow lights dancing in them. “Oh my god, don’t start.”

“This is so sweet,” you whine, lip trembling before he rolls his eyes, unbuckling his seatbelt and getting out of the car. Opening your door, he kneels down at your side, pulling your legs out to tuck your trousers into your socks. “What are you doing?”

“Making sure you don’t get bitten, dummy.” Then he eyes your long sleeves and nods, before he catches your lip shaking again. With a soft glare and a finger pointed at your face in silent warning, he stands, offering his hand to you before bringing you to his car’s bonnet. Leaning against the car, he pulls you into the gap between his legs, letting you take it all in.

“It’s beautiful.” You whisper, finally seeing it in all its glory. “I mean, it’s pretty from down there too, but from up here, it’s unreal.” Leaning your head on his shoulder, you look up at him, watching the lights twinkle in his eyes. “Wish I could take it all with me.”

“You can. It’s called a picture.”

“No,” you whine, hitting him when he laughs. “I mean, just- pick it all up and take it with me.”

“Ah.”

“You included.”

“Yeah?” When you nod, he inhales in a deep, sharp breath. “You gonna miss me?” When you nod again, he turns you around. He wondered when this would start. When anything and everything would set you off. He had his money on at least a month back, so he’s quite impressed you held out this long. With eyes full to the brim, his sad smile is all it takes to break the dam, your cheeks stained in seconds. “There’s no time to cry, dummy.”

“Not even a little?” He shakes his head at that, gritting his teeth at the thought. “Okay.”

“Okay.” He lets his thumb fall to the base of your throat, letting it pass over the pendant resting there. “Best day of my life that was. And every day since.”

“Yeah?” You feel your heart split in two when you see it. How he chews on his lip, the sheen to his eyes, the knit of brows. The pain he’s disguised so well. “Same.”

“Wouldn’t change a thing,” he whispers, forcing a smile.

“Neither would I.”

A man of haste. A man who despised waiting, a man satisfied only by immediate gratification, pleasure at his say so, pleasure now. And yet there is nothing that could make Minho rush this moment: one of his last with you.

Since you told him you’d be leaving, Minho has been docked, stuck, planning out a journey he’d never thought to run by you. There are times Minho forgets a time before you, a time when he would have been fine without you: before that first day two years ago. If he’d never knocked on your door, never laid eyes on you, where would he be now? If you’d only stayed a few months as planned. If you’d left when you should have. Where- who would he be? Someone else entirely he thinks. Minho wouldn’t be him without you. He likes to think all this pain is worth at least that much. Being loved by you, changed by you.

But now, as your hands creep toward the hem of his shirt, his fingers doing the same, Minho feels his mind fog up with all the moments he took for granted. Every passing second he deemed fleeting, irrelevant. Every moment he thought he could always get back.

He kisses you slowly, meaningfully. He doesn’t take his pleasure, but quietly pleads for it. He guides your back to his car, resting you there as he leans over you, fingers sliding up beneath your blouse, tongue working your mouth as you arch into his touch, silently begging him to hurry. You too had felt the shift, his slowed pace, his reverbed moans. Everything is sensual, hypnotic, purposeful, desperate, fleeting. You’re leaving. Leaving here. Leaving him.

Minho pulls his lips from you, his cheeks stained with tears you have to live knowing you caused. With a sniff, he pants through bitten lips, watching your eyes twinkle up at him as he tugs your top over your chest, throwing caution to the wind as he lowers his lips, placing slow, open mouthed kisses over your mounds, massaging them as he drags his lips through the valley of them. His eyes can’t leave you, he has to take it all in. Your low whines, your hung jaw, your rolled eyes. He watches how even the slightest twist of his hand can pull a sound he’s sure he’d heard a million times over but couldn’t recall once.

Tonight, he rights these wrongs.

Nibbling at your flesh, lapping at your skin when you mewl, curving his arms down your spine as you arch your back into his open mouth, his lips dragging down your chest to your waist. Rising to meet you face to face, he gazes at you as you blink up at him, stars still swimming your eyes as he slowly pulls down your jeans to dip his fingers into you. He just laughs when you gasp, his smiling eyes dark with arousal yet rimmed in dolour. He pumps his fingers slowly, spreading them, stretching you with a pace so excruciating, your tears spill. He’s so lost in the way you look at him, he almost flinches when you raise a hand to his cheek, the pad of your thumb wiping at his cheek.

With a sniff, he rolls his eyes. “I’m okay.”

“But, you’re crying.”

“I know.” He nods, pressing his lips to yours, increasing his pace only just. Dropping his forehead to yours, he exhales a shaky breath, trying to banish this feeling. “I’m okay. I'll be okay.”

“Lino,” bringing your hands to his cheeks, you pull his face up, trying to focus on him, but he’s relentless. With a small tug of his head from your grasp, and a firm press to your walls, you almost leave him, head falling to the bonnet. But your eyes don’t, and you watch as tears just stream from the eyes of your summer love. “Lino, listen-”

“No, just-”

Minho never found the sentiment in intimacy..

“Just, please-” he chokes out. “Just let me do this, okay?”

Until he began making love to you..

“Let them see how much I love you.”

Praying you would find something worth staying for.

“Let me show you how much I love you.”

‘Okay,’ you mouth, nodding as your throat nearly closes, kissing him over, and over, and over. He abandons his mission for a moment, unable to recite it as his fingers vibrate. He struggles with his belt buckle, nearly catching skin as he tugs his zipper down. He catches his breath as he pumps himself, tasting you, feeling you, memorising you.

“Sorry,” he mumbles against your lips, words pouring into your mouth. “I’m ruining this.”

“Never,” you smile, pressing your pout to his forehead. “You could never.”

“I love you.” He whispers, watching your tears roll down into your hair, your eyes alight. “More than anything.”

“I love you too,” you force out, head pounding. “Fuck, I love you so much.”

“Then just- don’t..” with a press of his hips, Minho slides into you, the words lodged in his throat.

“Don’t- don’t what?” You know what he wants. You can almost hear. You can almost hear yourself. You can hear yourself saying yes.

But it doesn’t come. Not when he finally grounds himself in you, getting lost in the feeling of you, his face tucked into your neck, his sense returning with every second he spends buried inside you. He clings to you, fucking into you with deep, languid strokes, his strength returning as his name falls from your lips, calling for him.

“Minho.”

“Yeah, baby?”

“Ask me.” Your breathless plea falls from your lips as you pant, watery eyes finding his. “Ask me to stay.”

“I-” clenching his jaw, he shakes his head. “I can’t.”

“Why?” He smiles down at you, kissing your stained cheeks, cradling your head. “Ask me and I’ll stay.”

“I know,” he tries, hearing your breaths quicken, your eyes fluttering. “But you made some promises you’ve got to keep, remember?” Slowing down, he strokes your cheek, lulling your eyes open. When his find yours, he grins. “And I can’t- I won’t get in the way of that. If what you want is out there, then you have to go, even if it kills me.

“But I just need you to make one more for me, okay?” He feels his tears roll off his chin, wetting your chest as you paw at his skin, nodding, dizzied by your pleasure, his pain. “I’ll be waiting right where you left me, so when you’re done out there, you come back and you find me, okay? I’ll be right here. Can you do that? Can you promise me that?”

“Yeah.”

“Say it.”

“I promise.”

It’s enough for now. No matter how empty, no matter how baseless a promise it is, Minho finds strength in it to go on. “Okay.”

“Hi, one gin and tonic, please.” You call over the bar. Luckily it’s warm out, the must of early summer clings to the air. It’s the perfect night for a restaurant opening, lights decorate the trees, the air fresh from the sea. You can see the whole town from this high up.

“One gin and tonic-” the bartender starts before looking up, eyes gleaming, starry from the yellow lights tangling the trees of the Yellow Wood. Reaching for a straw, he drops it in your glass, huffing, “What are you doing back here?”

“Keeping a promise.” Taking a sip of your drink, you let your eyes take the place in. The outdoor bar sits at the top of the cliff, right where his car was parked. A few yards away is his family’s new restaurant, a pretty hangul sign spelling ‘Lee’ in perfect script fixed upon it. “Plus, I heard someone built a restaurant on this death trap. I had to come see it for myself.”

“You didn’t RSVP.”

“Did too. It might have gotten lost in the mail..” You assume, though just over your shoulder Minho can see all your friends gawking at the two of you from Felix’s brick oven work station, and he suddenly remembers who’d been in charge of the invites.

Softening at the thought, Minho asks- “How’s London?”

“Good,” you shrug. “You look good.”

“I-” catching him off guard, Minho glares at you, his nose wrinkling in only slight disgust before he softens again. “You look great.”

“Wow,” you swoon, beaming at him. “Look at you. You’re not shy with the compliments any more, huh?”

Polishing a glass, he shrugs, “Got almost two years worth to catch up on.”

“Sounds like that’ll take a while.”

“What, you in a rush?” He skilfully probes with just a sprinkle of disinterest. “Someone to get back to?”

It’s then you take a long sip, watching the heat cling to him, a bead of sweat rolling down his neck before he looks at you, holding your gaze as you shake your head. “No.”

He looks away when you smirk, squinting at his blatant relief. “Didn’t meet anyone nice?”

“A couple people,” you shrug, fiddling with the straw. “No British Minhos though.”

“Ah,” he tuts, practically beaming. “I’d say that’s a shame, but-”

“Had a few decent fucks though.”

“Decent, you say?” He asks without missing a beat, tilting his head when you nod. “Didn’t take you for the type to settle.”

“Well, I get it where I can.”

“And tonight?”

“Hm?”

“Tonight,” he repeats, swallowing. “Where are you getting it?”

“Depends.” You hum, eyes locked on his.

“On?”

With a short exhale and zero tact, you ask- “Have you met anyone?”

Your heart stalls when he smiles, his eyes cast a little south of your own.

“Not since then.” Nodding his head towards you, you follow his gaze with your hand before reaching the base of your neck, your fingers landing on your pendant. There’s a beat before he asks, “How long are you in town?”

He laughs when you try and fail to bite back a grin, words spilling from your lips. “Again, it depends.”

“On?”

“On how long you want me here?”

Minho never found the sentiment in intimacy. Until he began making love to you, praying you would find something worth staying for.

Chewing back a smirk, he shrugs, “I don’t know-”

“Just a ballpark,” you whispered as he rounded the bar, ignoring the watchful eyes of all your friends. “However long you want.”

But you didn’t.

“Yeah?” After a long pause, he breathes, “Does forever work for you?”

You found something worth coming back for.

“Forever’s good.”

#minho #lee minho #lee know #minho x reader #lee minho x reader #minho smut #lee know smut #lee minho smut #skz smut #stray kids smut #stray kids x reader #stray kids #jisungparker #lee know x reader #i like this a lot :o

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boldlyvoid · 3 years

Text

Hypothetically | Chapter 16-20

summary: Reader and Spencer were friends in kindergarten, she watched him grow up and explore the world while she was still trying to catch up to him. now that they work together, they fall in love incredibly fast.

friends to lovers, case of the week style story

A/N: Set between seasons 4 and 6, not following canon. all original crimes based on real-life stories.

Warnings 18+: Murderers, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Blood, Guns, mentions of autopsy, Fluff, Falling In Love, Friends to Lovers, bed-sharing, Riding, Unprotected Sex, Virgin Reader, Case of the Week, original crimes, Food mention, Smut, Oral Sex, Light BDSM, Pregnancy, Pregnancy Talk, obgyn appointments and info, Home Invasion, Past Rape/Non-con, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Emotional Manipulation, Grooming, Pedophilia mention, non-con oral (male receiving), Pregnant Sex, Daddy Kink, Breeding Kink, Homophobia, conversion therapy

Word Count: 10k

chapter 16

It was 7 am when they got the call. Y/N had barely gotten any sleep that night, Spencer was adamant that laying on the left side helps maximize blood flow. Meaning she faced the wall all night with him happily cuddled into her back. She hated it.

Between peeing 100 times a day and the constant heartburn, she couldn’t really pick the worst part about creating a human.

It fuckin’ sucked and no one thought to warn her.

She dragged herself out of bed, trying her best to do her morning routine with only one eye open. Spencer, on the other hand, seemed to bounce out of bed like he slept 12 hours. Dancing around the kitchen as he poured his coffee and took a smoothie out of the fridge for Y/N.

He fed the cat, changed the litter and even took out the garbage by the time she pulled herself from the bathroom and to her closet.

Her jeans didn’t fit, she let herself take a minute to cry out of frustration in the closet before she looked for anything presentable. The only pants she could get into were a pair of leggings, and at that point, she didn’t care anymore. She was probably going to stay back with Penelope anyway.

She threw on an FBI sweater to hide her bump from the rest of her co-workers, grabbed the rest of her shit and followed Spencer to the car. Getting in the passenger seat and immediately closing her eyes again.

“Wake me up when we’re at Quantico,” she told him. Leaning against the window, ignoring the world.

Maternity parking was the only bonus, she only had to walk 4 feet from her car to the elevator. She felt lazy, but she was allowed to.

“Hopefully,” Spencer finally spoke to her as they entered the elevator. “At the end of this week, your energy should return as your placenta is done developing. You’re the most tired right now because your organs are working 3 times harder than they’re used to.”

“I’m tired because I had nothing to cuddle with all night, but thanks for the insight,” she tried her best to be cheery.

The door dinged, opening to the rest of the team standing in the entryway. “What’s up?” Y/N asked them.

“Hotch got a call, we’ve got a weird one coming in, he’s in his office talking to someone right now,” Morgan said. He looked just as tired as Y/N.

“Are we going in?” She asked, walking past them and towards the bullpen.

She rushed through the room and waddled up the stairs, searching for a chair before she actually passed out. Everyone followed her soon after, patting her back as they walked around the table to their seats.

“Over the past few months 6 feet have washed up on different beaches along the coast of Maine,” Penelope started explaining the case while Hotch was still on the phone in his office.

“6 feet belonging to 6 different people, all incredibly hard to identify. Interpol, Europol, the RCMP and the FBI have all been in communication with each other as no one knows where the feet washed in from. International Water laws prohibit just one of us from taking jurisdiction until we identify the nationality of the victims.”

“How are we going to Identify the feet?” Prentiss asked.

“We’re currently running the DNA against missing persons along the east coast as well as anyone who recently travelled to North America by boat, so far we don’t have any matches. We do know all 6 feet are white so hopefully, hopefully,” Garcia repeated for extra magic help, “this isn’t a refugee transport gone wrong.”

“We’ve been seeing an increase of boating accidents from Syrian refugees recently,” Spencer added. “The wars in the middle east are continuing to push people from their homes in mass numbers, meaning a lot of the boats are overpacked and capsize mid extraction.”

“So we’re probably looking at someone from North America who is using their own boat to sail out and release victims,” Y/N added. “Do we have the ME reports on the 6 feet?”

“Oh, yeah,” Garcia said, flipping through papers and handing them to her.

She read it over carefully, trying to see through her new blurred vision. Another wonderful pregnancy symptom. “Normally when feet wash up on shore, they’re in shoes. If a body is lost in a boating accident or drowning, the rubber soles will always want to float to the surface. When a body is decaying in water long enough the bones will separate, and when the ankle bone goes, the feet float to the surface,” Y/N explained.

“How do you just know that?” Rossi asked.

“In Nevada, we had a lot of drownings in a man-made lake, people would get stuck at the bottom on tree roots. And every year a few feet would wash up,” she added. “I only explained that because it says in the ME report that the feet were cut with a sharp blade, all clean cuts with no shoes or socks. So someone is cutting these bodies up and bringing them out to sea, probably to use as bait for a big catch.”

“It’s weird to me that the feet are the only parts washing up?” JJ’s face was absolutely puzzled as she flipped through the files.

“Not really,” Y/N argued, “I’m more concerned with why he’d even cut the feet, to begin with. With most shark attacks they go for full limbs, if I was the unsub and I was cutting the body up for bait, I wouldn’t make the pieces so small. There isn’t enough blood or flesh on feet to entice a large fish or shark to take it.”

Rossi was tapping his fingers against the table, “Do you think he wants us to find the feet?”

“I’m not sure, but it doesn’t look good.”

Then, Hotch finally walked in. “Which 3 of you want to travel to Maine to take a look at all the findings?” Prentiss, Morgan and Rossi raised their hands, “alright, meet me on the runway in 20. The rest of you, find a way to identify the feet.”

—

She sat at her desk most of the morning, munching on a bag of animal crackers to keep her nausea at bay. JJ brought her a cold ginger ale around 11, rubbing her back for a bit while she flipped through files.

She had a doctor’s appointment during lunch that day, so she headed downtown to give blood in the hour she was permitted. Knowing that she could be late and no one would really care.

She waited in Dr. Korrapati’s room patiently, looking at her arm as she rested it on the table. Her veins were more prominent now than they had ever been in her life. JJ insured her that they would go back down but it did make her a little self-conscious.

“Hey mama,” Dr. Korrapati cheered as she walked into the room. “How are we feeling?”

“Good, tired but good.”

“Work kicking your butt?” She asked as she prepped her arm for the blood draw. “Or just the baby?”

“Having a hard time finding a comfortable sleeping position, I’m probably going to get one of those long pillow things to help,” she rambled to take her mind off what was going on with her arm.

For someone who looked at dead bodies as her job, seeing her own blood freaked her out. Dr. Korrapati noticed she was a little stressed, “how about when I’m done here we take a look at your little person?”

That piqued her interest, she sat completely still and looked away as the nicest doctor she could’ve asked for, got the test over and done with, in record-breaking time.

“Do you have any other symptoms that are bothering you?” She asked as she wrote the exact tests down in her paperwork.

“Yeah,” she struggled with the sleeve of her shirt as she tucked her arm back in. “The nausea is driving me nuts, I’m living on animal crackers and ginger ale.”

“If you eat small meals every few hours it should settle it out,” she explained. “But if it is really bothering you we can give you some anti-nausea medication.”

“I tried that, everyone keeps bringing me snacks and trying to take care of me but I don’t want anything because I’m so tired,” she ranted as she climbed onto the exam table.

“Have you tried sleeping on the other side of the bed?” She asked.

“no, why?”

Dr. Korrapati laughed, “you sleep on the left side of the bed right?”

“Yeah?” She questioned, wondering how an OB could profile so well.

“So I'm assuming your smart and overprotective boyfriend has advised you to lay on your left side like he told JJ?” She smiled. “And because you sleep on the left side of the bed already, that means you’re not cuddled into him. He’s the big spoon now and you hate it.”

It was like a lightbulb went off in her head, “oh my god?”

They laughed at the fact it was so obvious and she never clued in. “It happens all the time, you’re so in a routine that you don’t realize you can just switch sides and it’ll work.”

“You’re so smart!”

“Ready to hear and see this baby of yours?” She asked, waiting for Y/N to raise her shirt and lower her leggings to expose her lower stomach.

“Can we?”

“Yep,” she nodded, “you’re in week 9, so you’re exiting the embryo stage and moving towards the fetal stage. We’ll be able to see the fetus and hear the heartbeat.”

“Can I record it for Spencer?” She asked, not wanting him to miss it.

“I’ll do you one better and put it on a disk for you.”

Just like that, she was smothering her stomach in warm jelly. Spreading it around with the ultrasound wand before she began to search for them. Pressing in slightly on her right side, she heard her own heartbeat whooshing. The closer she got to the centre, the more they heard the second.

Her baby’s heartbeat was strong. She saw them on the monitor, they had changed from being a jellybean to actually looking like a person. 4 strong limbs were stretching and moving, growing faster than she thought possible.

“That’s insane?” She was in such awe of it, “when will I feel the kicking and stuff?”

“In a few more months, they’re only the size of a green olive. You’ll probably feel it around Christmas?” She guessed. “You’ll be 16 weeks around then.”

“Wow okay,” she was just astounded by the magic of growing a child, she felt like absolute shit but it all made sense at that moment. In just a week, muscles and limbs formed and her baby grew the ability to self-soothe in the womb. Growing 10 fingers and toes that they already knew how to put in their mouth.

She cleaned the gel off Y/N’s stomach and began exporting the files for her. “So, I will call you when the results are in, and I can just email you guys a copy and go over it with you on the phone when you’re free? I know your job is unpredictable?”

“That would be perfect, thank you. We’re working on an international case right now so for all I know I’ll be in Ireland next week,” She laughed.

“Of course, take care of yourself make sure you’re taking all the vitamins and having 8 cups of clear fluids a day, you have to stay hydrated.” Dr. Korrapati handed her the disk in a sleeve as well as her contact card.

“Yes ma’am, I can’t wait to hear from you,” she smiled before leaving the office.

—

Y/N walked back into the BAU around 1:15, wandering down the hall to Penelope’s office to get a rundown of what she missed.

Spencer and JJ had the same idea, all turning towards the door as Y/N walked in, “hey.”

“How was it?” Spencer asked softly, beckoning her to his lap.

She sat down on him softly, “I got a DVD copy of the ultrasound.” She waved the disk around. “But, we can’t watch it until I get a rundown on what we know so far.”

“I hate how professional you are sometimes,” Penelope huffed. “Luckily, it is very important.”

“We matched a tattoo on one of the feet to a missing person’s case in Nova Scotia. So we focused our efforts on missing person’s cases who fit the same features and backgrounds as her,” JJ explained.

“Okay cool, who was she?”

“Andrea Carlton, 18. She was hitchhiking, apparently wanting to run away to meet her boyfriend in Newfoundland. I traced her transactions before she disappeared and it looks like she bought a ferry ticket, however, there are no reports of her ever getting on it,” Penelope added. “So I’ve looked into other people from Nova Scotia, Prince Edward Island, New Brunswick and Newfoundland, who went missing hitchhiking or after booking a ferry ticket.”

“Smart, how many matches did we get?”

“5,” She laughed.

“You’re kidding?”

They all shook their heads, “nope. And we were able to match all the feet to them.”

Y/N handed the ultrasound video over to Penelope. “Your reward.”

She snatched it from her hands so fast, taking it out of the packaging and shoving it in her CD port. Loading the file within seconds.

She watched Spencer’s face the whole time. Already having seen the footage herself, knowing the real show would be his reaction.

He was so mesmerized, his eyes blown up in awe as tears welled. His grip on her leg was more intense, he was squeezing along to the beat of the baby’s heart, absentmindedly. He shook his head in disbelief, that was his baby in there.

The phone rang before they could really talk about it, Hotch requesting the team hop on a plane and meet them in Nova Scotia. The RCMP and the FBI have taken sole jurisdiction over the case.

Y/N was able to convince him that it would be best if they get some sleep before they go. He agreed, telling them he expected to see them in Canada at 10 am sharp.

“Before we go home tonight can you cross-reference freelance charter boats or fishermen in the area the day each victim missed a ferry? Someone desperate to get a ride might be willing to hop in a boat with anyone going where they are,” Y/N suggested to Garcia.

“I’ll run it in the background, you two go home and get some rest so my god-baby can get big and strong!” She hugged her lightly. “I’ll see you tomorrow.”

Y/N and Spencer didn’t need to be told twice, practically running to their car. She let out the deepest sigh ever once she had her seatbelt on, so excited to go home.

Spencer drove them home, getting used to it as she got more pregnant. Soon she’d be too big to drive at all let alone stay awake the whole time.

“How are you feeling?” Spencer asked as they cleared the security check.

“Good, Dr. Korrapati is going to email us the results when they’re in and go over them with us on the phone. I told her we’d probably end up going out of the country soon,” Y/N recalled the day.

“The ultrasound was so cool,” he gushed.

“Yeah,” She smiled. Reaching to hold his hand on the centre console. “She also suggested we switch sides of the bed so that we can still cuddle while I’m on my left side.”

“She’s a genius.”

“that’s what I said!” She laughed, “literally how dumb are we?”

“187 till I become a dad and then I’m an idiot,” he smiled back at her quickly. “I’m glad you had a good day. Now we can go eat and get a full night’s rest.”

She let out another deep breath, “I can’t wait to cuddle.”

—

Garcia was waiting for them at the elevator the next morning. “Patrick Timmins.”

“Who?” Y/N asked, fully awake and ready to go, just confused by the ambush.

“I ran the perimeters that you asked for and I found a freelance fisherman slash charter service run by a guy named Patrick Timmins,” Garcia explained. “The townspeople call him Patty Tims, they think he’s fine and lovely according to his Yelp page but his criminal record tells a different story.”

“Really? I thought that was such a long shot!” Y/N was cheery from the extra sleep she got with Dr. Korrapati’s advice.

“The plane is ready when you guys are, I have all the updated info in this as well as some snacks for the plane,” she handed Spencer a cloth bag.

“What would I do without you? My pretty penny,” she kissed her friend on the cheek.

“If it means I get some sugar from you, I’ll do anything,” Garcia flirted with her in the absence of Morgan. “Go get on your plane, I will see you when you return my loves.”

They landed in Nova Scotia around 10 am like Hotch had requested. Bypassing customs and driving directly to the RCMP headquarters. They needed to come up with a plan, they had no idea how to find a man who travels by boat and lives at sea.

“We could always send undercover’s out in the areas he’s picked up before, have them dress as hitchhikers, miss the ferries and wait and see who tries to pick you up. Everyone will have a team watching and police boats on standby?” Morgan was theorizing as Spencer, Y/N and JJ walked in.

“We have report’s that he’s in the bay, if we’re going to do this we need to do it now,” An RCMP officer she hadn’t met yet announced to the room. “Who here is comfortable posing as a vic?”

JJ raised her hand, “get me some dirty clothes and I can be ready in 5.”

They raided the lost and found, they filled a backpack with random things and tried their best to dirty her fingernails and hair. She looked like she had been travelling without a proper place to stay for a while.

They managed to hide a wire on her, prepping what she was going to say if she was in danger and they needed to move in. Hiding a gun and a knife in her socks in case she needed them later.

They drove her down to the bay dropping her off 1 kilometre away, letting her walk into town while they parked closer to watch with binoculars. They planned it for her to arrive as the ferry pulled out of the bay.

She ran down the dock, trying to catch the ferry. Putting on the best performance of: “fuck, I missed the boat!” That they had ever seen.

“She’s going to win an Oscar,” Morgan whispered in the back of the surveillance van, trying to make Y/N laugh.

“Excuse me, ma’am?” They heard over the wire, trying to identify the source of the voice. The man was standing on his boat, hanging over the edge to get JJ’s attention.

“I missed the ferry, do you know when it’ll be back?” She played dumb. “I promised my mom I’d be back tonight and now I won’t be.”

“I can give you a ride, for a price,” the man suggested. “Names, Patty Tims.”

Hotch turned around from the front seat and motioned for Y/N and Morgan to head out quietly without making a scene. Listening in their headsets as JJ replied. “How much?”

They hid around the corner of the ticket booth, watching as the undercover officers walked around the civilians.

“Just a simple photo, I like to put a face to the stories I run across. Come on up,” he motioned for her to get on the boat.

She walked closer to him, “I don’t know sir, I should probably wait for the ferry.” She smiled.

“No,” he ground his teeth together and clenched his jaw, reaching for her.

She grabbed his arm and flipped him, getting into the boat and pushing him to the ground. She cuffed him by the time Morgan and Y/N could board. “What the fuck is this?” He struggled in her grasp.

“You’re under arrest for the murder of 6 people,” JJ replied, about to tell him his rights.

“Only 6?” He laughed.

JJ shoved him into the floor harder, reading him his rights before lifting him to his feet and shoving him off the boat and into RCMP custody.

Y/N lifted her hand up to high five JJ, pulling her into a half hug as they walked back to the surveillance van.

She never had a sister before, JJ was probably the only woman in her life that she felt this close to. It was mostly to do with the fact she’s always been so wonderful to Spencer. She helped him feel loved before Y/N, and that was important to her.

“Can we search the boat? Or are we still waiting on the warrant?” Y/N just wanted to check with Hotch before she barged onto the boat. Not wanting to jeopardize what they’re allowed to enter into evidence.

“We got it, you can start looking,” Hotch said, handing her a pair of gloves and a handful of evidence bags.

JJ went with her. They walked in together, noticing that he wasn’t lying about wanting a photo to go with the story. Below the deck, the entire wall was filled with Polaroids of terrified people moments before their deaths.

They bagged them all into evidence, dreading having to put them all into the system and match them to missing person’s reports. Delivering the news that someone’s loved one was gone for good was never fun.

Telling 58 families that their loved one was dead was a nightmare.

chapter 17

She’s a little confused when she wakes up to the sound of geese honking. Rolling away from Spencer’s embrace and immediately being blinded by the sunlight in the room. She sat up in a small panic.

She had forgotten that they stayed the night at the new house.

The large windows in the bedroom faced the water. She could see the sun’s reflection on the lake as it stretched over the house from the east. It was absolutely stunning. She could get used to waking up early with a screaming baby if this was the view.

Then she remembered it was the day they got their test results, she bounced a little as she reached for her phone to check her messages.

“Morning bunny,” Spencer’s groggy morning voice startled her a little.

“Bunny?” She questioned, never hearing him call her any form of nickname before.

He reached out of her, wrapping his arms around her growing belly, resting his head in her lap. “Have you ever noticed you hop a little bit when you get excited?”

“Yeah, it’s called Asperger’s,” she smiled as she ran her fingers through his hair. “It’s honestly better than bugs bunny though, just don’t throw carrots at me okay?” She laughed to herself as she recalled the childhood trauma.

It was a little funny, looking back now.

“Never, you’re my bunny. I love my bunny.”

He was so soft in the mornings. Snuggling in against her skin as he slowly woke up. He stretched and yawned a bit, making the cutest little sounds as he did so.

She kept her fingers in his hair, twirling the ends every once and a while. Mostly running her nails along his scalp, soothing that big beautiful brain of his that she loved so much.

“We find out what the sex is today,” she reminded him.

He lifted up her shirt to expose her belly. Kissing the skin as she laid back against the pillows.

“What’s going on in there today?” She asked softly.

“They’re the size of a prune,” he mused. “speaking of, as you enter the fetus stage this week you’re going to get constipated.”

She couldn’t help but laugh, “thanks that’s exactly what I wanted to know!”

“Right now the fetal development is focusing primarily on the bones, tummy and teeth,” he explained with the largest smile on his face.

“There we go.”

He hovered over her, brushing the hair from her face so he could look at her, “You look so beautiful right now.”

He said that as if he wasn’t blocking the sun from her view, perfectly casting a halo glow around him. She placed her hand on his cheek, “I love you.”

He leaned in and kissed her, pressing his body softly against her’s. “I love you,” he whispered between kisses. Covering her face and neck with small pecks, making her laugh as he covered her body in kisses.

The phone rang on Spencer’s night table causing him to press his forehead against her hip, letting out a deep sigh. Y/N reached over and picked it up. “Doctor Spencer Reid’s phone,” she answered. “He can't come to the phone right now, can I take a message?”

“Funny,” Penelope replied.

“We have a case,” Morgan added.

“What time do we need to be on the plane by?” She asked.

“Uh, it’s 7:46 now, so you’ve got an hour, tops?” Penelope guessed, “why?”

“I said he was busy. I’ll see you later.” She hung up.

“You did not just do that?” He looked absolutely horrified, his whole face turning pink.

“They could either think you got some, or you could actually get some?” She teased. “We have an hour.”

—

“All 3 Vic’s had been strangled and raped before they were wrapped in plastic and released into the river,” Garcia explained to the team over the laptop as they travelled through the sky. “Washing away all of the unsub’s DNA, however, they did find carpet fragments under the victim’s finger-“

“Like the ’84 Oklahoma Child Murders,” Y/N cut her off.

“What?” Garcia asked.

“Oklahoma 1981 to 1984. Local black children between the age of approximately 6 and 17 were being abducted, raped and murdered. Their bodies were mostly discovered in wooded areas and along the edges of the river, never submerged. The BAU worked the case, only ever being able to solve the last 2 murders before the Oklahoma governor, I think, kicked you off the case, right? They cared more about the money going towards the investigation than the black children going missing,” She explained.

“Gideon and I tried,” Rossi said. Still very bothered by the ending. “We wanted to catch the guy, the last 2 murders were so different from the others and yet the local cops considered it the same guy. Much like this new unsub, he raped young men before strangling them and dropping them in the river. All the way down to the carpet fibres.”

“It ended up being a local man named Oscar Pope, they caught him dumping an older male victim at a police checkpoint. They matched carpet fibres at his house to the 2 rivers Vic’s, but none of the children,” Prentiss cut in. “This has to be a copycat right?”

“We don’t know that,” Y/N added. “The BAU was working the angle that a local boy who knew the majority of the victims was in on it. Um, Daryl Livingston, he was in foster care at the time. He was the 7th boy to go missing and then every one of his friends was found dead after that. However, his body was never found. They suspected that he formed a bond with his captor and offered to bring him, other boys, if he let him live.”

“Any chance that this unsub could be the same kid, using Pope’s tactic to get our attention back on him?” Morgan asked.

“I was about to say that too,” JJ cut in. “they might’ve even been a team back then as well. That would explain why the murders stopped when Pope was caught but they still never found that boy.”

“That’s possible. They concluded that the last victim Pope dropped into the river was a long-time, secret boyfriend of his who found out what he was doing to the children. His MO changed when he didn’t want people to tie the murders together,” Spencer provided the extra information. “Only backfiring when local cops patrolling the river heard a splash.”

“Garcia, can you see if any of the Vic’s have any relation, contact or even geographical coincidences with the original murders?” Rossi asked. “If this is a victim continuing Pope’s work we need to find out who knew him.”

“Sir, Oscar Pope is still alive in a local correctional facility,” Garcia added. “I’m going to run background checks on all contact he’s had in his entirety at the prison, it might take a while but I’ll get it.”

“Garcia, I can go to the facility and just read everything they have there. It might not be all digital yet,” Reid offered.

“Good idea, take Y/N with you. You two bounce ideas off each other better than the rest of us,” Hotch agreed. “Morgan and Rossi join the search teams at the rivers. JJ and Prentiss, we’ll set up communication with the locals and go through old case files.”

“Reid’s good at bouncing somethin’ off her, alright,” Morgan teased him. “You were on speaker this morning.”

Spencer turned bright red once again, burying his face into the table as everyone laughed, reaching across the aisle to give Y/N high fives.

—

Being in a prison was always weird for her.

Having to hand in her gun just to read papers in a dusty office made her uncomfortable. She understood the protocol and she knew the guards would keep them safe, but knowing she was near men she helped put away, that scared her slightly.

“I’m not finding anything,” Spencer sighed. “There was a flood 2 years ago that destroyed most of the files near the ground. Including the Pope documents.”

“We can always just go ask him?” Y/N suggested, “he’s in D cell, he’s behind bars. We can just talk to him from the hallway unofficially. Pretend we’re here for someone else. I’ll say I never thought he really did those murders and gain his trust, see what happens.”

“I don’t like it but, I think we have to,” he agreed. Opening the office door for her to lead the way, “after you.”

Spencer felt very protective, she could tell. He was never pushy or controlling with her, but for some reason, he was now manhandling her. Making sure she walked on the inside of the hallways, closer to the brick walls so that no one could get her through the bars.

“So Doctor Reid,” she picked up the conversation as they hit the D block. “I was reading the book you lent me about engineering.”

“Oh,” he tried to play along. “How did you like it?”

“It was good,” she replied while trying to look at each inmate she passed. “I loved page 187— oh my gosh?” She stopped at Pope’s cell.

“You’re Oscar Pope?” She pointed at him.

“and you’re?” The old man questioned her. “A fed?”

“We’re here for something political, nothing to concern yourself with,” she lied, getting closer to the bars, whispering. “I just want you to know I never thought you did all 16 of the child murders back in the day.”

“Thank you,” he was suddenly enthusiastic. “Now why can’t all the fed’s be as smart as you?”

She laughed, tapping his arm through the bars. “How are you doing? Is there anything I can get you while I’m here?”

“Phone privileges!” He answered quickly, “the mail’s taking forever and I’ve got people to talk to before I croak in here.”

“I’m sure you do sir,” she smiled at him. “I’ll pull some strings, you have a good day!”

“You too, beautiful!”

Spencer placed his hand on her hip and led her away from the bars, she waved as they walked away.

“Agent Y/L/N,” a voice stopped her at the end of the hall.

She turned to see a man sitting cross-legged on the cell floor. His orange jumpsuit gathered around his waist as he sat in an undershirt. She glanced over his body, stopping at his face. She’d know those eyes anywhere.

“Didn’t I say only good boys get to talk to me, Bitch?” She snapped at him.

“Congratulations on the little one.” He replied. Laughing as Spencer placed his hand over her small stomach and led her out of the room, through the big metal doors.

“Keep walking with me,” Spencer insisted. “Or I will turn around and I will kill him.”

She huffed and continued down a narrow hallway with him. “We need to call Hotch.”

“Yeah,” he flipped his phone open and hit the speed dial.

“Reid?” She heard Hotch answer.

“We couldn’t get any of his information from forms, they all had water damage so Y/N and I walked past Pope’s cell and struck up a conversation,” He explained.

“And?”

“She got on his good side, pretending that she could get him a favour while she’s here for political reasons. He said he’s desperate to make a phone call today.”

“I’m on my way, get Garcia to prep paperwork to allow us a meeting with him now,” Hotch instructed, hanging up.

Y/N dialled Garcia on her phone. “How’s it going love birds?”

“Not good,” she replied. “We need you to get the paperwork going to allow us to sit down with Oscar Pope today. And we’re going to need to tear through his cell.”

“Oh, damn okay,” She replied. “Ask him about Cody Kollins.”

“Who?” Spencer asked as his phone rang again. He flipped it open, “we’ve got Garcia here too.” Putting it on speaker.

“Morgan and Rossi just intercepted a man dropping a body in the river,” Hotch confirmed. “I need you to rush that paperwork.”

“Sir, what was the man’s name?” Garcia asked.

“Cody Kollins.”

They sighed at each other, “let’s do this.”

—

Y/N watched him through the mirror. She could see him fidgeting. He was frustrated. He was exhibiting the exact same behaviour as he was when he was caught the first time.

“Every time we one-up him, he breaks down,” she whispered to Spencer. “Even in his interrogation tapes, he was like this. When they found the single patch of carpet left in his closet and were able to match the fibres, he lost it. He likes to play it cool and under control, he wrote the story and he wants us to stick to it.”

“How upset do you think he’d be if we went in there and told him we actually caught the original killer and he’s going to be released pending DNA testing?” Spencer suggested.

She tilted her head, biting her lip as she thought. “I think he’d be violent.”

“Sit here,” he said as he walked into the interview room.

She hated having to just watch. It helped that Pope was cuffed to the table, and the table was drilled into the concrete floor, Spencer wouldn’t get hurt. The guards are right behind the door. It’s fine.

“Sorry for the abrupt interrogation, I promise this isn’t what you think,” Spencer smiled softly. “We have reason to believe that the original killer has returned, the state is running the DNA now.”

Y/N watched as Pope’s right eye started to twitch, his finger on his leg was tapping at an odd rhythm as Spencer talked.

“The second we can prove you had no hand in any of the killing’s we’ll issue a pardon and your discharge papers will be filled out,” Spencer finished his sentence and moved to open the door once more.

“You’re a fuckin’ idiot,” he hissed. His voice was completely different than it was when they were speaking in D block.

“Why?” Spencer asked, easily playing the innocent and stupid role.

“You think some crazy-obsessed, fuck toy of mine whose doing half-assed attempts at my signature, is the real killer!!!” Pope spat his confession out. Literally covering the table in spit as he became more feral. Shaking violently.

Spencer walked right out of the room. Y/N watched as Pope smacked the table, tugging violently at the cuffs, scratching himself all up. The guards had to run in and hold him down, shooting a sedative into his neck.

“Jesus,” she whispered. Taking her phone out of her pocket to call Garcia, when she noticed the voicemail notification in the bottom corner. She ignored it, calling her friend instead.

“Hey,” Penelope answered quickly. “So turns out we were right, who would have thought, Cody Kollins is actually Daryl Livingston.”

“We just got a confession from Pope,” Y/N shared her news. “They had to sedate him so we’re going to come back to the station. Wait until tomorrow to interview him again.”

“Yeah, sounds good, Hotch and Morgan are in with Livingston right now,” she updated them. “Make sure to eat something when you get there.”

“Yes mom,” she teased, hanging up and smiling.

Spencer put his hand out in an invitation to hold it. She interlocked their fingers and followed him back to the filing room, gathering their things before exiting the prison.

She sat on the passenger side of the SUV, she and Spencer just sat there and took a few deep breaths. Processing everything the exact same way, quietly and on their own.

She cut the awkward silencer by taking out her phone and playing the voicemail. Putting it on speaker.

“Hi Y/N, this is Doctor Korrapati calling. I’ve emailed you your results. The gender is at the bottom, under the little read more button, in case you wanted it to be a surprise. Call the office and let us know when you’re free to go over the results and we’ll book you in, as far as I can tell everything looks good, so don’t feel the need to rush. Take care!”

Spencer looked over at her with a soft smile on his face, reaching out for her hand once more. Holding her hand with both of his now, “do you want to do this?”

“I’m ready if you are?”

He nodded, watching her contently as she opened her email up, finding the right one and scrolling to the bottom. Her heart fluttered a little as she looked at the read more option.

She took a deep breath and clicked on it.

Chromosomal sex: XY

“Well?” Spencer asked softly.

“I’d really love to tell you,” she bit her lip trying not to laugh, “but I don’t remember what this means?”

He laughed, shaking his head as he looked at the screen. He blinked with glossy eyes as he read it, a light chuckle escaping his lips as he cried softly.

It had to be a girl, she knew he wanted one. She convinced herself in that millisecond that it was a girl.

He reached over and placed his hand flat against her belly. “Hi Matthew,” he said softly.

“You’re kidding?” She couldn’t stop herself from crying.

Spencer wrapped her up in a hug, the two of them happily crying into each other. She wasn’t sure if she was giggling or sobbing, she just knew she was shaking in Spencer’s arms with happiness that this was her little family.

He kissed all over her one cheek as he held her close. “I love you so much,” he reminded her.

She pulled back, wiping her tears off on her shirt sleeve, laughing at the serendipity of it all. “I love you too, dad.”

“I have to drive, don’t make me cry again,” he laughed, wiping his own tears before tucking his ever-growing hair behind his ears.

“Let’s go.”

—

Y/N sat beside JJ in the break room of the police station, salad bowl in her lap, shovelling the dressing-covered leaves in her mouth.

They weren’t tasked with anything until Hotch and Morgan attempted to get some info out of the unsub. “Were you crying earlier?” She asked.

“A little,” Y/N smiled at her. “We’re having a boy,” she whispered.

“Oh my god!” JJ whispered back at her, reaching out for her arm and shaking her a little. “I have a feeling your little guy will be bigger than Henry was so he’ll fit into all Henry’s summer stuff when he’s born!”

“Seriously?”

“Yeah!” She confirmed. “By the time he grows out of everything I might have a second boy and we can rotate it around again,” she laughed. “This is going to be so fun.”

“Matthew and Henry are going to be best friends,” Y/N smiled.

“Matthew,” she repeated. “That’s a nice name, I like it.”

“My brother’s name is Levi, I thought it was a nice way to keep a family name in my baby’s life, and his middle name is going to be Gideon,” she spoiled it for Spencer.

JJ looked a little emotional, “sorry it’s just so surreal thinking about me and Spencer having kids who are friends.”

Y/N moved her dinner out of the way and hugged her then, holding her tightly. “You better not be pregnant too,” she whispered in her ear. Not wanting to give it away if she was.

JJ just laughed, rocking Y/N back and forth in her embrace, not answering. “Right?” Y/N asked again.

“We’re trying, so who knows,” JJ replied.

“Shut up?” Y/N pulled back and stared into her eyes to see if she was telling the truth or not. “Holy shit? Since when?”

“Honestly, I think the night we celebrated Canadian thanksgiving,” she laughed. “You and Spencer got us talking about babies, and you got Henry to sleep through the night, so this is technically your fault.”

“JJ,” Y/N started to cry, “I’m so happy for you.”

“They’ll only be a few months apart, so they’ll be best friends too,” JJ smiled. “This is going to be really fun.”

chapter 18

For Christmas this year, Y/N just wanted to be fully moved into their new home before they had to leave for Vegas. Spencer followed through with the present. Inviting the entire team over for drinks if they promised to stop by Y/N’s apartment and bring a few boxes to the new house. It was basically just free labour.

She spent the night nesting while her friends drank in her kitchen. They understood why she was nervous, she was going to tell her parents about the baby and the engagement, and the house, in 3 days.

It was all going to be a lot.

She was 16 weeks along as of Christmas Eve. Waking up the morning of their flight to a weird twitching sensation in her gut, like butterflies or a muscle twitch but right where the baby would be.

“Spence,” she shook him awake. “Spencer.”

“What’s wrong?” He sat right up, squinting at her as he tried to figure out what was going on.

“It’s like, I don’t know how to explain it?” She worried.

Spencer placed his hand on her belly feeling the slight flitter. “He’s kicking.”

Spencer’s early morning smile was the best, he tackled her back against the pillow and dug his face into the crook of her neck. “That’s my baby in there.”

“I wouldn’t have known,” she laughed, wrapping her arms and legs around him. “We have to go to the airport soon.”

“I know,” he mumbled into her neck.

“If you get up now, we can go get breakfast before we have to board?” She enticed him, “we can get sprinkle donuts for the flight.”

“Okay,” he said as she freed him from her grip. “Are you nervous?”

“I know they’ll be happy, just not ready for them to ask why I didn’t say anything sooner,” She explained. “I’ve been really distant since I got the job, I’m really excited to spend time with them this weekend.”

“Same,” Spencer smiled. “Come on you two.”

They took a 9 am flight one-way to Las Vegas. Y/N slept most of the ride, spending the last 45 minutes just snuggled into Spencer’s shoulder as he watched a documentary on some form of science or math. She couldn’t hear what it was about, all she saw was a man writing out numbers on a chalkboard.

She ran her hand over her belly lightly. There was no way she could walk into her mother’s house in a few minutes and just pretend it wasn’t there. It was there. So were the 5 pounds of baby weight on her hips and the swelling in her face and knuckles.

She was pretty quiet during landing and baggage claim. Thinking in her head what she was going to say to everyone, how she would explain it. She sat in a cab beside Spencer, absentmindedly following him through the airport they’ve both been through at least 20 times.

It was a short trip to her parent’s house. Spencer traced little shapes into her leg with his finger to distract her. A flower, a 4D cube, the words I love you. It was sweet, non verbal comfort was very important to her.

When they arrived, she stayed in the cab to pay while Spencer got their bags out. Taking as long as possible so she could avoid it a little longer.

Biting the bullet, she took a deep breath and walked out into her parent’s front yard. Taking the handle of her suitcase and dragging it up the walkway.

She walked right into her house, her parents and brothers all standing up from the living room and rushing into the entryway. She was wrapped up in 7 hugs within a matter of seconds.

“You look so different,” her mom said as she pulled back from her hug. Holding her arms as she examined her, “what did you do?”

“I got pregnant,” she replied, scrunching her face as she waited for their response.

She could’ve sworn she went deaf at that moment, reaching down to cover her bump as everyone cheered and jumped around her. She was pulled into a group hug before she could process anything. Laughing awkwardly at the whole experience.

“Be quiet, he can hear this week!” She laughed.

“He?” Her father inquired.

She looked back at Spencer, smiling at him. “It’s a boy,” Spencer confirmed.

“Holy shit!” Her brothers cheered, high-fiving each other. “When are you due?” Harrison asked.

“June,” she smiled. “3 days after mom’s birthday, see I do remember it.”

“Come sit,” her mom insisted, pushing everyone out of the way and dragging her to the couch. “Put your feet up, how are you feeling?”

“I’m fine,” Y/N insisted. “You’re almost worse than my co-workers.”

“Are they taking good care of you?” Her father asked.

She waited for Spencer to join her on the couch, they had all been so excited about her they forgot he was there. “Yeah. Um, we have a lot to tell you,” She explained, holding Spencer’s hand for comfort.

“I asked Y/N to marry me,” Spencer announced. “I am so in love with her, this baby is a dream come true and I’m very excited to become a part of your family.”

Her mom cried, tossing her hand over her eyes as she sobbed. “Mom,” she was so overwhelmed with everything she started to cry too.

“You’re a wonderful man Spencer,” her father interjected. “It’s an honour to have you.”

Spencer smiled and nodded towards him, silently thanking him for the approval.

“So, it’s kind of insane how it all happened. It wasn’t intended, but we love him so much already,” Y/N glowed as she spoke. “Are we going to tell people the name yet?”

Spencer nodded, “we can.” He smiled down at her with such wonderment, the moment she had been scared of for 16 weeks turning out to be the best time she’s had with her whole family in one room.

“His name is Matthew Gideon Reid,” Y/N smiled. “After my favourite brother, no offence Harry, and Spencer’s mentor.”

Levi was her more emotional brother. He was her best friend growing up. The 5 year age difference gave them the time to grow up separately but still find common interests to bring them together. They were the closest in the family before she moved to Virginia full time it became hard to keep up with him as much.

Now they were both parents, their kids only having a 3 year age difference. Meaning next year there would be 2 little ones at Christmas.

“That’s a lovely name,” Levi smiled. “Thank you.”

“It’s whatever, don’t expect our kids to have your name either,” Harrison replied as he held his wife close, pretending he was a little offended.

“We also got a house,” she added to change the topic, “Jason Gideon, he kinda gave us his place in Virginia.”

“You’re kidding me?” Debbie gasped. “For free?”

She laughed, “it’s complicated.”

“I grew up without a father, and Gideon neglected his son for his work at the BAU,” Spencer chimed in. “We bonded, and he wanted his house to be used for good. He specifically asked for us to fill it with love and laughter. We’ve just finished moving into it. You can visit any time!” He panicked and rambled by the end.

“I don’t know if you know this,” her mom tried to joke with them. “But there’s this thing called a phone, where you can call your mother and tell her these things.”

“I wanted to!” she hurried the words out. “But I’m still working in the field, I was weary with who really knew besides the team. It’s my only weakness on the job.”

“I get it,” Debbie smiled. “Honestly, I’m so happy for you both.”

“Thanks, mom,” Y/N choked back tears. “Sorry,” she laughed. “Pregnant things, y’know.”

—

Visiting hours at the nursing home changed during the holidays. Spencer and Y/N were permitted to enter anytime between 8 am and 10 pm, giving them lots of time to spend the afternoon with Y/N’s parents before visiting her.

They borrowed her dad’s truck, driving to the nursing home with a special gift for Diana. Spencer had spent the last 2 weeks making a scrapbook page about Matthew for her, he knew how much her book meant to her and he wanted to add to it.

Her mom’s co-workers all stared at them as they walked in hand in hand. Her bump on show under the T-Shirt she chose to wear.

Diana was in her room, then walked down the long hallway to her suite. Knocking lightly on the door, waiting for her to greet them.

The door swung open, “Spencer!” She cheered. Hugging him tight in her arms.

“Hi mom,” he held her just as tight. Knowing he was a mama’s boy always made Y/N’s heart flutter.

She pulled back and looked at Y/N, “you look so nice!”

“Thank you,” she smiled. Stepping in close to give her a hug as well.

Diana welcomed them into her room, closing the door behind them. Y/N took a seat on the couch while Spencer looked around at the new things she had on display.

“I made you something,” he said softly, taking off his bag and pulling the pressed cardboard out of the protective sleeve. “here.”

She held it in her hands, looking at the ultrasound photo they got a few weeks ago at the anatomy scan. “What is this Spencer?”

“You’re going to be a grandmother,” he explained. Watching her run her fingers over the words on the paper. She was in shock, she had nothing to say. She just looked at the photo.

She quietly walked over to Y/N and sat beside her, “may I?” She asked, holding her hand up.

Y/N leaned back a little, “absolutely.”

Diana placed her hand on the bump lightly. “I was so worried I wouldn’t get to really experience this one day,” she whispered. Trying her best not to cry. “Thank you.”

Y/N cried, not realizing how special this must be for them. She was so focused on her family that she forgot that this was going to change Diana’s whole world. She now had 2 boys to love unconditionally.

“His name is Matthew?” Diana asked, running her hand over the bump softly.

“Yeah,” Y/N smiled. “He’s due in June. If you can, you can fly out and stay with us for a little?”

“I’d love to,” Diana replied. “I have enough points for a trip, and I’ve been feeling really good on my medication.”

“If your doctors clear it all, Debbie and you can fly in together,” Spencer confirmed.

“Wow,” Diana smiled like Spencer. Wide thin lips, straight white teeth, big rosy cheeks and glistening eyes. She hoped Matthew inherited it too. “This is my best Christmas yet.”

—

Y/N woke up Christmas morning with Spencer cuddled into her side in her childhood bedroom. She slipped out of his grasp and sat in her windowsill instead.

She pulled her knees to her chest as best as she could now that she was pregnant, looking at the lone swing across the street that swayed in the December morning breeze.

It should be 8 am back at Quantico, her parents must have let them sleep in while they opened presents. She could see Chloe in the front yard trying out her new car. Levi smiled as he pushed her down the road, Lizzie filming the whole thing on her phone.

Her whole life was so different from the last time she really sat on the windowsill in her bedroom. Back then she was about to move to Virginia, graduating college in Nevada and getting into the training program at the academy. Harrison was already there at Fort Meade, she was about to move into his house with his wife for the first semester before settling into DC. Levi and Lizzie had just started dating, Chloe wasn’t even conceived yet. And she had no idea when she’d run into Spencer.

She rubbed her hand over her belly as a tear rolled down her cheek. She couldn’t wait for the day that she was pushing her own child on that swing across the street. The day she and Spencer tell him about the love story that bubbled between two kids with books who looked at each other for years before they fell in love.

“What are you doing?” Spencer asked, removing her from the moment she allowed herself to have.

She wiped the tear from her cheek, “they’re happy tears. Go back to sleep.”

“Come cuddle?” He pouted, his big puppy dog eyes drawing her back to the bed.

She snuggled into him, running her fingers against his bare chest as she watched him breathe. “Can I tell you something?”

“Always,” he kissed the top of her head.

“When I was 17, I had my appendix out.” She rolled over and laid back, showing him the 3-inch scar on the right side of her stomach. “It was pretty bad, they said I would have died if my mom waited 15 more minutes to get me to the hospital. They had to fix parts of my stomach and intestines that were eaten by the ruptured appendix bile.”

“I had no idea,” he whispered, running his finger along the scar. “I always thought that was just a scratch.”

She shook her head lightly. “It was December 5th, ’98. They uh,” she took a deep breath before resuming. “They put me on a drug called Dilaudid, they told my mom it was a non-addictive version of morphine and that I’d be fine but, I kinda got addicted to the pill version when they let me out,” she scrunched her face as she told him. Not wanting his opinion of her to change.

“You’re kidding?” He asked, a chuckle fell past his lips as he sat up. “In my second year at the BAU I was kidnapped by a man with dissociative identity disorder and he drugged me.”

“Dilaudid?” She asked, sitting up too and shaking her head in disbelief.

He laughed at how absurd it was, “yeah.”

“I moved to Benadryl for the sleepy and calm effect after I couldn’t get any more refills and didn’t want to admit I had a problem, and weed in college” she added. “but I haven’t even taken a Tylenol in the last 5 years now.”

“I had a small problem with it after everything, but I’m also clean now,” Spencer smiled at her. “Why did you want me to know?”

“Because I don’t want to take any drugs when I deliver the baby, even if I beg for them I don’t want them to give in. I talked to Dr. Korrapati about it but I wanted you to know too,” she explained. “Being in here all night got me thinking about a lot.”

He wrapped his arms around her and tackled her back against the pillows. “I love you,” was all he said.

“I love you too?”

“Seriously,” his voice was so soft and low. “I’ll never stop.”

chapter 19

She woke up to the feeling of hair tickling her face. She swatted at her face to try and get it to stop before opening her eyes. She blinked into the early morning sunlight, only to Spencer looking down at her, his hair long enough to tickle her skin.

“You were snoring,” he whispers down to her. “Also, Happy Birthday.”

She smiled, pulling him down and into a hug. “Thank you.”

Every morning with Spencer for the last 10 months had been special. Something about the warmth of his body against hers, and the sunlight bouncing around their new bedroom made this morning her favourite.

It was so calm on the water. She could see the snow settling on the ice as the sun made it glisten like diamonds. The birds had all but disappeared for the winter, the stillness in the world was lovely. It was like time stopped with Spencer laying in her arms.

“What do you think Penelope has planned at work today?” She asked him softly, playing with his incredibly long hair. It was almost longer than hers now.

“She told me to bring you in after 8.”

“So does that mean you have to distract me for a little while, Doctor Reid?” She teased him.

He pushed himself up, leaning on his arm as he hovered over her. “Any requests?”

She spread her arms and legs out like a starfish. “Have at ‘er,” she couldn’t stop herself from laughing as Spencer just shook his head.

He dipped down to her belly, blowing a raspberry onto her protruding bump. “Good morning to you too little dude,” he whispered against her skin. “Go back to sleep.”

She shoved him lightly, not able to stop herself from smiling, “he is asleep, leave him alone.”

It was the best morning ever.

Every time she thinks that she’s reached peak happiness she discovers another level. It felt like every time he touched her, she wanted to describe it as the best she’s ever felt.

When they finally got dressed and made their way downstairs for the morning, she found it incredibly odd that he wasn’t asking her what she wanted for breakfast, like he did every morning. Very concerned that she had all her meals and then some.

She fed the cat, picking him up and giving him a little snuggle after he finished his breakfast. “You are getting so big and chunky buddy, I might have to change your food timer.”

He meowed at her, sounding really pissed, making her laugh. “Fine but when you can't climb all the stairs in this house it’s your fault.” She placed him back on the ground and watched him wander into the sunlight. Plopping onto the hardwood and stretching out. Just living the life.

“Ready to go?” Spencer asked.

“Yeah, are we stopping for breakfast?” She asked, the second trimester making her hungrier than ever before.

“Penelope has it covered,” He said, placing his hand on her back as he leads her to the foyer.

“Oh this’ll be good,” she smiled, putting her shoes on before arming the alarm and heading outside.

Spencer locked their beautiful green front door, it was colder out than they had expected. He held her hand as she shivered slightly, they walked down the 3 steps together, Spencer not wanting her to fall if it happened to be icy.

Seat heaters were a blessing from god. The car was freezing when they first got in, the heater barely kicked in by the time they reached Quantico. Living 10 minutes away now was really nice.

Up the elevator they went, she was basically bouncing with excitement. “See?” Spencer nudged her with his shoulder. “Bunny.”

“Shut up,” she smiled as the door dinged before opening.

They walked into the bullpen to find it empty. She took off her coat and placed her bag on her desk before slowly walking up the small set of stairs and heading towards the briefing room.

All her co-workers were sitting around the table waiting for her and the boy wonder to arrive. Strawberry cheesecake danishes sat on a tray on the table, a strawberry milkshake in front of Y/N‘s regular spot.

“Happy Birthday!” They cheered as she walked in.

“You guys!?” She was so flattered. Never in her life has she been thrown a party by someone who wasn’t her mother. “Thank you.”

“Sit, sit,” Penelope insisted. Placing a danish on a napkin and putting it on her spot on the table. “I know you can’t have ice coffee right now, I thought a milkshake was the next best thing.”

“I seriously love you, come here,” she pulled Penelope into a hug, kissing her right on the mouth as everyone cheered.

“See that?” Penelope blushed. “Kisses are how I should be thanked around here.”

“HR already hates us,” Hotch made everyone laugh, “don’t push it.”

They all ate breakfast together, sharing stories from their weekend. They decided to spend New Years’ apart, everyone taking time to themselves for the first time ever.

“Where did you go, Prentiss?” Morgan inquired.

“Sin to Win weekend in Atlantic City,” she sighed and leaned back in her chair.

“Oh my god?” Y/N looked at her with absolute astonishment.

“What’s that?” Morgan and Spencer asked at the same time.

“Nothing.” Emily and Y/N replied in unison. Making a look at each other that screamed: ‘tell anyone and I’ll hurt you.’

Like a saviour, the fax machine in the briefing room turned on, spitting out 15 sheets of paper in a few minutes. Penelope cleaned off the table while Hotch ran everything over.

“Last night a family in Boston had their home burned down with them inside it,” Hotch explained.

“How is that something for us to look into?” Rossi asked.

“Because the unsub broke in and turned the water off and tampered with the gas system, causing CO2 to render them unconscious. He stabbed the father to death in the bed before laying gasoline all over the floors and lighting the house on fire.”

“Damn,” Y/N whispered under her breath. “That is personal.”

“I’d say,” Hotch agreed.

“Who was the family?” JJ asked.

Garcia looked through the sheets of paper spewed across the table. “Thomas Greenway, 61. His wife Alison 43. And 2 children aged 8 and 12.”

“We need to head to Boston,” Hotch announced. “I’ll call about prepping the plane. Y/N you can stay here with Garcia if you’d like, your insight will aid her search greatly.”

“Yeah, I wouldn’t mind,” she smiled at Garcia. “Good luck out there.”

“Wheels up in 30.”

Everyone sighed before standing up. Spencer leaned in and kissed Y/N softly before standing up. “I’ll see you later.”

“Come home to me safely Doctor Reid.”

He smiled down at her, fixing his shirt before he left with Morgan.

“I hate to see him go, but I love watching him leave,” She said softly towards Penelope, making her laugh in the process.

“Come on mama, let’s go to my office,” Garcia said, putting her arm out for Y/N, the two of them skipping down the hallway with their arms linked as the team filled the elevator.

Y/N sat in Garcia’s office and immediately put her feet up, still drinking her milkshake as she flipped through the case files. “Can I suggest possibly the dumbest thing ever?”

She laughed, “shoot.”

“So, homeboy here breaks in and knocks out a family with co2 poisoning, just to stab the father to death and light the house on fire.” She ran it down once more, “What if we just search mothers stabbed before dying in a fire and just see if this is some traumatized kid, at this point that’s what they all end up being.”

“That’s not a bad idea,” Garcia said, typing away as she added the parameters. “It’s like you can see the fucking future?”

Y/N threw her head back in a laugh, “did you get something? Seriously?”

“Adele Hollis was found dead in a burning apartment building in Boston in 1978. ME reports say she was already dead from co2 poisoning before she was stabbed 6 times in the chest. The whole apartment complex went up in flames after the unsub doused the bed in gasoline and lit her up.”

“Well fuck,” Y/N replied. “Does she have children?”

“Yes, her son Cameron was at school when it happened. He was 8, he moved in with his step-dad shortly after, they ruled him out and never found the guy,” Garcia added.

Y/N leaned across the desk and dialled Hotch, the plane hadn’t even left yet. “I think I found the unsub?”

“How?” Hotch asked.

“I jokingly asked Garcia to search and see if there are any men whose mothers died in a fire after being stabbed cause we deal with sooo many traumatized kids, and we found one,” she laughed at just how insane it sounded.

“Video in and give us a rundown.” Hotch hung up. Ever the conversationalist.

Garcia and Y/N squeezed into the same frame seeing everyone gathered in the little plane seats. She gave them the basic rundown of her findings, watching them all shake their heads at the fact she solved the case already.

“Have the local PD issue a warrant and bring him in. Can you check and see if he knows the victims?” Hotch asked.

“On it sir,” she smiled, clicking away.

“How did you do that so fast?” Morgan has to ask, “it’s not human.”

She laughed again, “If I’ve learned anything in the last 10 months it’s that traumatized little boys can fuck up a lot of people’s lives.”

“Preach,” Rossi added.

“Um, guys,” Garcia’s tone changed. “Cameron Hollis’s birth father is the father who was stabbed in this case.”

“You’re shitting me?” Y/N couldn’t believe it. “Do they have any kind of relationship?”

“His father is on the birth certificate but it looks like Adele left him when Cameron was 3, after some domestic disputes that had the cops at their door. She was remarried when he was 6, it doesn’t look like they ever really talked,” Garcia explained while continuing to dig.

Y/N watched through the monitor as the team gripped their seats, the plane was taking off now. They would be in Boston with this guy in just a few hours.

“Thanks, Lady Wonder,” Morgan winked at the camera for Y/N before leaning in and turning the monitor off.

She sat back and put her feet up once more. “Best birthday ever.”

—

They had Cameron Hollis in custody with a full confession before 5 pm that day. Everyone was beyond thankful that they would be back home with their families shortly.

Y/N had said goodbye to Penelope shortly after, driving home to have some alone time. Rossi would drive Spencer home, they lived close enough now that they could all carpool if they wanted.

She had never been in their new house all alone before. She took the time to just walk around and admire everything, being thankful that her life ended up like this. Not taking a second of it for granted.

She sat down on her bed finally, taking her phone out and calling JJ.

“Hello bestie,” she answered.

Y/N smiled, “Hey, do you think Will could find a babysitter tonight?”

“Probably, why?”

“Tell him to drop Henry off and head to my place. I’m going to have pizza delivered and you can come here with Spencer when you land,” Y/N offered. “Have a date night with us.”

“That would be amazing, I’ll call Will right now. See you later,” JJ sounded happy. It made her smile.

“See you.” She hung up, laying back against her bed softly.

She changed quickly before heading downstairs, wearing a pair of leggings and an academy t-shirt. She was getting too big for almost everything she owned now.

She placed an order for a few pizzas to arrive at 8:30. Next, making sure she had more beer in the fridge, for the nights when Will wandered over with JJ. They had visited almost every weekend since she and Spencer moved in.

That’s when she saw him.

chapter 20

Previously...

The dream was always the same:

A man would get into their home, he knew their schedule, he knew when she’d be alone.

He’d get in without any trouble and he never made a sound. She wouldn’t even know he was in the room until she felt the cold metal gun press against her face, as shaking hands instructed her to tie her own behind her back.

He’d always use her supplies. Duck tape, shoelaces, scarves. Anything at his disposal that he didn’t have to bring with him. Almost as if he didn’t fully choose her to be his victim until the very last minute.

He assaulted her all for what felt like hours, stopping occasionally to cry in the bathroom or eat a snack in their kitchen. And he always showered at the end. Sometimes, he’d wrap her up in a housecoat, put her sheets in the wash and sincerely advised her to invest in a better lock for the sliding door.

Then he was gone.

Slipping into the night, on his way to become someone else’s nightmare...

There was a man in her yard, he was dressed in all black, with a backpack wrapped around his shoulders and a ski mask on his face.

He couldn’t see her from where she was in the kitchen, but she could see him. She ducked to the floor and crawled towards the stairs, booking it up the steps and grabbing her gun. She made sure it was loaded, grabbing a second clip from her nightstand and tucking it into her pocket. Then she detonated the alarm system from the remote on Spencer’s bedside table.

She crawled into her closet, making herself look like a pile of clothes.

And she waited.

She felt a little insane, she tried to convince herself that it could be anyone from a neighbour to a lost person from the trail. For all she knew, it was someone from the academy lost in the woods.

She tried to calm her breathing, calling Will with her cell phone. “Hey, JJ just filled me in-“

“There is someone in my backyard in all black with a backpack, how fast can you get here?” She panicked in a whisper.

“Fuck, okay, I just dropped Henry off at the sitter. I’ll be right over, stay put and I will call you when I’m there,” his southern accent came out more when he was stressed.

“Okay, thank you,” she hung up and took a deep breath.

She closed her eyes, listening to the sounds in her house.

She remembered what the house sounded like that morning. The stillness, the quiet peacefulness of her and Spencer in the bed only 12 feet away from where she was now hiding.

She remembered the way the floors creaked as it popped and settled with the heat, how the tree outside would sometimes tap the window, the sound of snow tumbling off their roof. Passing cars on the main road kicking up gravel, the odd bird singing in the cold breeze, her own heartbeat in her ears.

Then she heard the alarm turn off with its overly happy welcome home chime. Only knowing one man would be able to disarm her alarm system without a code, and he was in the air right now.

“Open,” she heard the alarm’s voice as the door opened.

Footsteps travelled along the hardwood floor in wet shoes. She listened to the sound of the wet rubber on hardwood explore the first floor.

There were 2 people in her house, splitting up as one went to the kitchen and one went up the stairs.

She aimed her gun at the doorway, aiming to shoot anyone who walked through the door in the leg. Not wanting to kill anyone who she knew that might’ve gotten in for a different reason, unannounced.

In the rare happenstance that this wasn’t her worst nightmare coming true.

Her hands were shaking as she kept the gun pointed for what felt like hours, just waiting for him to find her. The door handle started to turn slowly, she heard the sound of the old metal grinding ever so slowly.

The first thing she saw were his eyes, yet again. The same eyes that haunted her dreams, the eyes every woman she spoke to for 2 years remembered from behind the ski mask.

Fuck Wichita, he was her own personal nightmare. He had been for a while. Those eyes, big and black all the way around, not a single glimpse of colour or life or hope. Every single dream came flooding back as she saw him in her doorway, the same aura of death, destruction, loneliness and despair from all those months ago was now filling the most special place in her home.

He still hadn’t seen her in the closet, looking around the room carefully as she watched him. Waiting for him to get closer, and closer to where she was. Finally peeling back the wooden closet door.

“Surprise, bitch,” She said before aiming higher and shooting him between the eyes, knocking him down.

She stood and stepped out of the closet, “Travis fucking Johnson,” she shook her head as she looked at the man bleeding on her bedroom floor. Taking his pulse to ensure that he was dead.

She couldn’t hear anything for a second, trying her best to zone in on the sound of someone tiptoeing in her kitchen, “WHO ELSE IS IN MY HOUSE?” She screamed.

Suddenly she could hear the sound of a car on the gravel and then a door slamming. She stepped into the hallway, gun pointed, looking over the railing towards the front door.

“Y/N?!” Will yelled. Gun pointed as he entered her house.

“I’ve got one down, I think there’s another in the kitchen,” she replied.

“On it.”

Y/N looked down the hall, none of the upstairs rooms were open, every door exactly how it looked when she ran up the stairs. She headed down the steps when 2 shots were fired.

She quickly ran to the kitchen to see another man on her floor behind the counter, his feet the only thing she could see as he laid there, dead. Will was standing over him, taking his pulse.

“He’s gone,” Will confirmed.

Y/N finally let herself panic, shaking as she tried to catch her breath, pulling out a chair from the counter and sitting down. Her adrenalin was running wild in her bloodstream, she didn’t even know how to speak let alone think about what had just happened.

“Y/N,” Will’s soft voice brought her back to reality. He was right beside her, wrapping his big strong arms around her to try and calm her down. “Shh, it’s okay.”

“Who was it?” Is all she asks him.

“I have no idea, who was upstairs?” Will asked.

“Travis Johnson, from my first case with the BAU,” she calmed down a bit, breaking away from the hug to get off the chair.

She walked around the counter island, looking down to find another man she knew, bleeding on her brand new hardwood floors. “Oh my god,” she felt sick at the sight.

He smelled the same, stale and rotten. The same look on his face even as he slipped into eternal damnation. Empty as when he was alive, pure evil down to his core. Dead to match how he felt inside as he did those awful things to undeserving mothers.

The second worst man she’s ever come in contact with.

The Winnemucca Womb Raider.

She backed up into Will, he held her close so she didn’t drop to the floor, helping her back into the chair. “Do you know him?”

“Yeah,” she felt herself starting to cry. “How? They were both in prison?”

“We need to call the police,” Will said softly before taking his phone out.

“911 what’s your emergency?” She could hear the muffled woman’s voice as he pressed his phone to his ear.

“This is Detective William LaMontagne Jr. Two men just broke into my friend’s home and tried to kill her,” he explained the situation, making her shutter.

She watched as he talked to the woman, suddenly not able to hear anything as her body slipped into shock. She was completely numb. In the last 10 months she hadn’t fired a single shot on the job, and yet on her birthday, the one time she's alone, she has to kill someone in her own home.

The place where she was supposed to feel safe and happy. Where her new life with Spencer and Matthew was supposed to start. They promised Gideon love and laughter, having that dream stripped from them when Pure Evil stepped over the threshold.

It was just like the dream, the last one she had before Spencer wrapped himself around her, calming her down.

This time he wasn’t here, he didn’t even know that this had happened, he wasn’t always going to be there to save her. She pulled herself back into the moment, calming herself like she had all those years before him.

She wasn’t a damsel in distress, he knew that.

A man walked into her home, the one time he knew she’d be alone and vulnerable.

That was the only part of the dream that matched.

Unlike her dream, she wasn’t a victim. Not in this house. Not in her space. Not ever.

The sound of the sirens echoed in her ears finally, she turned to the commotion of officers running into her new house. Will walked them through it all, telling them who Y/N was and that this was her home. How she saw a man in her yard and hid before killing him upstairs.

“Ma’am?” A stranger in a uniform tried to get her attention. “Ma’am, can you come with me?”

She nodded, standing up and finding support in the man’s arms. He wrapped her up in a silver blanket before he led her outside and into an ambulance. She had her vitals taken and an oxygen mask placed on her to help her calm down.

“Is the baby okay?” She asked the EMT, pulling the mask off her face so he’d hear her.

“Yes,” he smiled. “Strong heartbeat, no signs of distress but you need to relax so we can keep it that way.”

Will climbed into the ambulance then, taking her hand in his, “hey doll, are you okay?”

She nodded, “just a little shook up.”

“I called Spencer,” he said softly. “They’re 30 minutes from landing, then him and the team are on their way. No one told the team about the prison break in Oklahoma, they didn’t even think to connect them back to you.”

She sighed, “two cases in 2 different states, where the offenders ended up going to a 3rd state to meet and do time together and bond over the women who put them away. Makes sense.”

“You put them both away?” He asked.

She nodded again. “I basically made it my life goal to get Travis Johnson, he’s the reason I have this job, he’s the reason I’m pregnant right now,” her words trailed off into whispers. “I saw him in November, he congratulated me when he saw the bump.”

“Who was the other guy?”

“The Winnemucca womb raider, he would kill pregnant women by strangling them before removing their wombs,” she looked at him, horrified. “They wanted to kill us...”

She wrapped her arms around her own stomach, she had almost forgotten to worry about him. To even think that she was more than just one person at the moment.

They weren’t after her, they were after the most important thing to her. Her son, her baby boy. Like all the mothers before her, like their own. They wanted her to suffer, for her son to be spared a future worse than death in their opinion.

All the images from the cases came flying back as she blinked faster and faster. Strangled women, removed wombs, thanking God for a second that Spencer was the one to see the recovered organs in his trailer. A sick feeling bubbled in her body, a chill ran deep in her bones.

Then everything went black.

—

The first thing she remembers when she gained consciousness again was that Spencer was furious. She could see him and Hotch in a heated conversation from inside the ambulance, she tried her best to wake up and zone in on what was going on.

It was too dark for her to read their lips, but he was angry.

JJ was sitting beside her now, holding her hand. “Hey, bestie.”

“Did the cat get out?” She doesn’t know why that’s the first thing she asks, “the door was left open, did he get out?” Still in shock, still trying to understand everything.

JJ shushed her, petting her hair as she leaned in close, hugging her softly. “He was in the laundry room, Will said he made sure to find him when you were getting checked out.”

“Good,” she nodded along as she listened. “I’m so overwhelmed.”

JJ let out an awkward laugh, “I can imagine.”

“I’m also starting to fall in love with your husband,” she found her sense of humour then. “He has perfect timing.”

JJ laughed a little harder, causing Spencer’s focus to shift to the ambulance. Y/N watched him run towards it and jump in.

“Y/N, oh my god,” Spencer wrapped his arms around her. “Are you okay?”

“I’m fine,” she replied. “I’m safe, the baby’s healthy,” she assured him.

He kissed her all over her face, making her giggle when he wouldn’t stop, repeating kisses all over her face, her ears and her neck. She could hear JJ also laughing as she watched with Hotch just outside.

He finally stopped to catch his breath, hugging her again with his face in her neck. “I love you,” she reminded him.

“You love me?” He pulled back, “I love you so fucking much, I am never leaving you alone again.”

“Spencer,” she laughed, “I think I handled it pretty well.”

He huffed and shook his head, “you shouldn’t have had to handle this in the first fucking place! It’s not that fucking hard for someone to call the god damn FBI and say hey two psychopaths that your genius new girl put behind bars, fucking escaped!”

She finally knew what Hotch meant when he said Spencer’s anger scared him. She looked at him like he was a whole different person, “Spence, baby, I know. It’s okay, I’m fine see?”

She placed her hands on his cheeks as she looked into his beautiful hazel eyes, watching his pupils change size as he focused on her. Love and life behind them, true happiness clouded by horror at the thought of losing the love of his life.

He was what a true man was supposed to be, a real genuine person with love and kindness, and empathy. Her soulmate, her Spencer.

“We can’t control everything, that’s what you told me. We handle what’s in front of us, and we do it well,” she smiled as she reminded him.

Spencer started to cry, pulling her in close. “I can’t lose you.”

She cried at the sound of his voice, his heart shattering as he cried in her arms, his chest heaving as he tried to catch his breath. Terrified on a level she’s never seen in him before.

She rubbed his back as she held him, rocking him lightly as she shushed him absentmindedly. Soothing him as if her life depended on it, it broke her heart to see him this broken about the idea of losing her. She loved him so much it made her heart physically ache in her chest as she held him.

“I’m not going anywhere,” she promised, whispering against his hair. “I’ll kill a million men if it means coming home to you.”

He laughed in the middle of his cries, she could feel him smile softly as he sniffled against her shirt. “Promise?” He asked as he pulled back to look at her.

She wiped the tears from his cheeks, his beautiful eyelashes clumped together in the wetness. He was so sweet, she couldn’t help kissing him quickly, “promise.”

—

Hotch insisted they head to the BAU with the rest of the team while he handled the crime scene and the forensic clean-up, knowing on a personal level what it was like to clean Evil’s blood out of your bedroom carpet.

Y/N was sitting in the car waiting to leave when she saw Will coming out of her house with 3 pizzas. “I forgot I ordered those,” she gasped at the sight.

“You should’ve seen the look on the delivery guy’s face,” JJ laughed.

It was really bizarre having a pizza party in Rossi’s office after shooting someone in her home. Everyone was trying to be as chipper as possible to try and take the tension off the situation, but Y/N was pretty quiet.

Morgan got everyone to settle down before closing the office door, sitting close to her and Spencer. “Everyone in this room has either been shot, in danger, held hostage or worse,” he offered her some support.

“If you want to share anything, express any feeling or just tell us to fuck off, you can,” his words were soft, she watched him with soft eyes as he spoke.

“The only thing I can think of is that fate is fucked up,” she replied, the honesty slipping off her tongue like it was made of butter.

“You have the floor,” he insisted that she continue.

“I moved into a tiny apartment, farther away from my job, because I needed somewhere to live, and I found Spencer in the hallway. Spencer led me to you, and you guys helped me find Travis Johnson, my personal nightmare case of 2 years,” she explained like they never knew that. “But it’s so much more than that now.”

“We ran into Travis at the prison in Oklahoma a few months ago,” Spencer added. “He noticed that she was pregnant and congratulated her.”

“But the thing that’s fucking me up the most is that, and sorry TMI,” she warned them before continuing. “but we conceived the baby in Kansas when we caught the VICAP counsellor, only a few towns over from where we arrested Travis. Then we ran into him on a different case in Oklahoma, and he happened to be in the same prison as a man from New Mexico I put away for killing pregnant women. Something about this all lines up so perfectly... I hate that I find it so interesting.”

“That is kind of insane,” Morgan agreed. “I think it just means you and Spencer are being pulled together by something with bigger plans than you realize. And you’re a good shot, so thankfully you have nothing to worry about now.”

“Thanks,” she smiled.

She held Spencer’s hand, looking down at the ring on her finger that meant she was his forever. As much as she hated the idea of a man owning a woman, she loved the idea that Spencer was her person forever.

They were tied together in a way no one would understand, she loved him deeper than she ever thought possible.

Everything happened for a reason. Her reason just so happened to be Fate wanting her to spend the rest of her life, Happily with Doctor Spencer Reid.

—

She woke up around noon the next day, Spencer was sitting up beside her reading a book when she finally clued into where she was. They had spent the night at Rossi’s house while the forensic cleanup team handled her kitchen and bedroom.

“Good morning,” she smiled up at him, stretching against the sheets as she fully woke up.

He put his book down and joined her, wrapping her up in his arms and kissing her neck softly.

“Good morning,” he replied finally. She loved his voice when he hadn’t spoken yet. His vocal cords yearning to be used.

She smiled against his skin, holding him against her chest as she breathed him in. Her safety, her cosmic soulmate.

Everything just felt better in the world when they were pressed this close to each other. This was how they were meant to be.

“How are you feeling?” He asked after a few minutes of silence.

She rolled him onto his back, snuggling into his chest and lifting a leg over him so the baby wasn’t squished. “Good, I’m excited to go back home later.”

“You’re not scared,” his fingers ran through her hair as she felt his breath on her face.

“No,” she shook her head against him. “Yesterday could’ve been a lot worse, but I’m trained to think on my feet and the danger is gone now. I’m never going to let myself be a victim in my own home.”

“I love you,” he reminded her. “And after yesterday-“

“I want to get married soon too,” she cut him off, getting up and sitting on his hips. She ran her hands over his chest as she looked down at his beautiful, still puffy, morning face.

He beamed up at her, “I feel it too, I want to make it official. I want to shout it from the rooftops that the love of my life chose me too.”

She nodded softly, “and we agreed that in April this year we’d go to Vegas, and we’d do it. I think we still should, I just want to plan it a little.”

“Of course,” he agreed, squeezing her thighs in his excitement. “Come here.”

She held his face in her hands as she leaned down, rubbing her thumb over his bottom lip as she looked at him ever so softly. “I love you,” she said before kissing him.

His hands wandered over her back, holding her into the kiss. Breathing in deep through his nose, kissing her as if they hadn’t seen each other in months.

Spencer was desperate to love her, and she was desperate to be loved by him.

She broke the kiss to just look at him, moving his hair back and pressing her forehead against his. “The park across the street from my parents house,” she whispered.

“Mhmm.”

“I want to get married there, I want to start the rest of my life in the spot where I first really fell in love with you,” she explained, her lips close enough to him that the words could have stuck to his skin.

“I think I can pull some strings and get us a permit by April,” He smiled against her lips, “what day are we thinking?”

“The 23rd, 1 year exactly,” she said before Spencer pulled her back into another kiss, this time it’s soft and delicate. “Until forever,” she whispered against his lips.

“You need to promise me one thing,” he added. Feeling her nod as she kissed down his neck. “I know you said you’re fine, but the second you’re not I need you to tell me.”

“Okay,” she agreed, sitting back up as she straddled his hips. “You have to do the same, I can’t handle you crying in my arms like that again, it really broke my heart.”

He held his pinky out to her, she smiled as she wrapped her own around his. Both leaning in to kiss the other's knuckle, a small tradition Y/N adored.

—

They were back at their house by 5 pm. Hotch had ensured that everything was completely cleaned and there was 0 evidence that a crime had even taken place on the property. Penelope on the other hand had taken it upon herself to break into their alarm system and reset it for them shortly after everyone left.

They changed the code, closed the door and sighed at the beautiful home that felt a little different now. “I think I want to paint,” she announced.

“Yeah?” Spencer laughed at the suddenness.

“It’s too blah, y’know? I see what they were doing with the whites and beige for all the light. But, I’m thinking green in here to flow with the cabinets in the kitchen,” she walked through the foyer as she imagined the colours that would look good. “Like an olive or forest, maybe even jade. It’ll look nice with the dark wood.”

“That would be nice,” Spencer agreed. “Make it feel more like the old apartment.”

“Exactly,” she smiled. “I miss the clutter and the intimacy of the last place, and I know you miss the look of books everywhere.”

“I’m still alphabetizing them in my office,” he added. “I’d like to paint in there as well, I’ve been looking at antique chairs and couches for my reading.”

“Hotch is going to make us take 2 weeks off again,” Y/N looked at him with excitement. “We can put all our energy into this place now.”

“Let’s make it ours,” He agreed.

“Wanna go to the hardware store and look at paint samples?” She hopped with excitement, grabbing his arm and tugging on him.

He laughed, pulling her into his chest. “Sure, bunny,” he pressed his cheek to the top of her head as he held her. “What about Matthew’s room?”

“Oh, me and Penelope have it all planned, all the stuff is being delivered next month. She kinda went a little nuts,” Y/N laughed.

“He’s going to be one loved little boy,” Spencer chuckled. “Come on, let’s go.”

#hypothetically #spencer reid #spencer reid smut #spencer reid x reader

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jae-canikeepyou · 3 years

Text

| kismet | j.jh | part one

pair: jaehyun x fem!reader

word count: 10k+ welps

summary: his parents sends him for a month long vacation to the country side to meet his other half, which so happens to be you. and alternatively, your beloveds asks of you to be in your best behaviour while he’s around. disliking how things turn out, you both come up with a pact with each other before your two families gathers together for christmas eve dinner.

genre: arranged marriage + bad 1st impressions

a/n: happy new year ✨ and you know what that means? *wink wink* new layout for my oneshots hihi! ok you guys this took soooooo long to write ;-; i wasn’t satisfied with the first draft so i had to reboot everything! and i mean everything!! :3 so i had this specific genre in mind for a long time and i’m glad that someone requested at the same time while i was in the progress of writing it~ i should’ve posted this on christmas day but i was spending time with my family :D hope you understand hihihi anyway i’ll stop this here so you can enjoy reading! ~j

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| part two | part three (final) |

jaehyun never reacted so quickly in his entire life, simultaneously spitting out the drink he consumed and eyes growing at the news his parents suddenly brought up. his neck ache at sudden twist. “what did you say?” he wiped the drips of coffee at the corners of his lips. his breathing intensified the more the silence passed.

mr. and mrs. jeong playfully sighed & exchanged looks as their son shouldn’t be this surprised regarding the topic. they have discussed about this when he turned eighteen. now twenty-three, he shouldn’t be so surprised or over-reactive about it either.

“you heard your father,” mrs. jeong chewed her meal elegantly, yet giggles were still heard through closed lips. “you’re meeting her next week.”

he squinted with plenty of doubts filling his head, he was sure that there was still a year left. and to him that also meant he has exactly a year to convince his parents to call off the marriage he never asked for, let alone planned it. he still has a lot- correction, have yet to achieve in his mid-twenties and having a wife now would be slightly cutting his privacy short.

in other words, the path to leisure he wished for after years of academics would divert to spending a life planned out for him. he had a diary and planner, and

they were organised and well-thought out. but he had enough of his parents writing out his future for him, why couldn’t he write his own love story?

jaehyun was on his second last year of veterinary medicine, having some of the weight and pressure of academics lifted off his shoulders. of course he knew he still has to study, he just felt a little relaxed knowing that he would soon practice his dream career.

never had he expected that time flew and was going to meet his fiancé soon.

his phone blinked with along with a message from his friends— mark and johnny. he briefly looked at the wallpaper of his long-time girlfriend of four years; she was the one who was on his mind. “nononono, i can’t get married now.” jaehyun’s panicking voice echoed the dining area, shoving the phone into his pockets.

mr. jeong raised a brow, placing his cup of coffee on the glass table. “relax, you’re not putting a ring on her finger yet.”

“‘yet’?!” the dimples on his face deepened as his cheeks bubbled. “mom, dad, i haven’t even met her!”

“hm? that’s why you’re spending the whole month at the countryside!” mrs. jeong exclaimed excitingly, and to jaehyun it seemed she was enjoying herself as if she were the one going there too.

“a month?! what am i going to do over there?!”

“isn’t this great? we finally get to see you outdoors instead of a laptop and report papers! you need a break honey.” his mother clasped palms.

“ugh i can manage my time—”

“once you start working i’m pretty sure you won’t have the time to, jaehyun.”

since the love topic was brought up, his parents started to dig out their memories during their dating years. jaehyun groaned and massaged his temples, feeling uncomfortable with all the love stories he already heard or been told about. “did you forget that i have a girlfriend?” mumbling, he let out a deep, long sigh hoping they would hear him. and that failed miserably. his parents were in their own world.

he shook his leg underneath the table and grew impatient with the duration of their conversation. “please, i’m begging you. i’ll get married in my own time and pace. sue and i are pretty much going to settle once we graduate-”

a certain ringtone perked his ears and his hands quickly pat his pockets to search his phone. he let out a sigh of relief, that his girlfriend psychologically read his mind and knew how much he wanted to get out of the dinner table, not to mention his parents’ overly attachment to one another.

“sue you called! i was wondering if you want to hang out for a while.” his voice was high in spirits. but word has it when it reached its high, it would plummet to the ground shortly after. “hey, what’s wrong?”

on the other line, just a call away from his girlfriend, was her held-in sob and whimper. “where are you right now? i’m coming to get you.”

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jaehyun’s limbs shook in anger and slammed his fists onto the stirring wheel so hard that this time he promised himself he would move on. last week, she didn’t just break up with him— that was a call for farewell, something kept well hidden from him and all this time he didn’t know she felt the way she did for the years they’ve spent together.

for a minute he wished this was all a dream, that conscious world would wake his slumber mind. it wasn’t. the reality pretty much awoke him and kept him up all night. he blinked several times, her words still numbing his hearing, wishing it was a lie... but he heard her loud and clear that night.

“...you’ll always have a place in my heart.. but i’m really sorry..”

he grew speechless though his heart had millions of questions. the windows of his lips sealed closed no matter how much he wanted them to be answered. opposite from where he was at, he stared at the porch of her house, waiting for a silhouette to appear before him. instead a luxurious car pulled over and an unfamiliar man took his coat off to wrap around sue. that action didn’t hurt jaehyun, but it was sue’s smile of comfort that triggered his pain more. seemed like she knew this man given that she let him into her house, like nothing heartbreaking happened before this.

the door closed and jaehyun’s teary eyes never left her residence until loud slams of swinging car doors opened on both sides of the passenger’s seats. “tsk.” he hissed and quickly rubbed the tears meaning to fall. him being seen crying would really make him a target for his friends, for not moving on. couldn’t risk being the attention more than he already was.

“goodness mark it’s not like we’re on vacation that you have to pack almost everything,” johnny threw one of mark’s duffle bags at the boy, earning a so-what kind of look from him. “we’ll only bring jae to the y/l/n’s then leave afterwards—”

screw this, jaehyun thought. by now he shouldn’t look too swollen to his friends. but screw mark for renting and living across from his ex’s house.

“save your explanation john.” jaehyun growled and started the engine, fastening his while seatbelt the two continued their bickers. more of it was mark’s shallowness that pissed johnny.

“yeah, save your explanation john- ow!” mark gave the tall lad a death-gazing glare at the pain that stayed on his skin.

johnny leaned forwards, tapping the dimpled boy on the shoulder. “dude, you changed your mind?”

jaehyun scoffed, resting his left arm onto the window’s edge as he drove. “mom said i should be accompanied. i didn’t want you both to come but she’s so insisting it’s getting into my nerves.”

“actually mrs. jeong said you might need us after your sudden breakup,” mark pressed the button. the window rolled up and down whereas him and johnny exchanged looks to try to liven up the mood in the car. “what are friends for, hm?”

“o-oh yeah. you’ll need us.. as in.. ‘sue’pport.” he nodded with a fake sob. soon mark bursted out in giggles and joined the wagon.

“‘cause you lost your ‘sue’weetheart.” “she’s making you ‘sue’per emotional.” “we were ‘sue’prised she dumped you.” “but as your brothers, we ‘sue’wear we’ll be here—”

“ugh! i don’t know why mom suggested you to come but your side comments really aren’t helping at all—” jaehyun rolled his eyes regretting instantly at the pain afterwards.

his friends found him hilarious. they were laughing so hard that jaehyun couldn’t continue or interrupt their exploding voices. “since when did you need help, mr. leave-me-alone?” johnny took a huge leap from his seat to be beside the offended boy. “for all i know you’re the type who wants everything perfect, in control and planned.”

“nah dude, right now..” mark zipped his bag. “he needs help with love issues.”

“this has nothing to do with my love! and for the record, about the y/f/n’s? it’s arranged!” he lowered his cap and slid back slightly against the seat while the car was on idle. “do i need to spell it out for you?”

“that can change dude,” johnny slurped on his giant soda takeaway. jaehyun battered his eyes but was careful enough to not leave his sight off of the road. “who knows this fiancé of yours could meet your expectations. maybe more than sue could ever do.”

jaehyun’s mind clouded and still had the effects from the breakup. still so fresh. he didn’t want to believe it in fact happened; that it was all true. he was sure sue was the one for him. hearing his pals say it word per word only had it finally sunk in— she dumped him.

it terrified him in ways he couldn’t imagine, haunted him countless of nights because he failed her. he even bragged to his parents that he would marry her and slip a ring on her finger. thinking about it, how stupid was he to hold onto that hope?

he looked like an idiot, felt like one and his friends probably viewed the same. they said his fiancé could outstand sue? she was the perfect package! what more could he get?

he had her.

honks of the vehicles behind led jaehyun’s eyes trailing to the stoplight that emitted green. he pulled over and johnny knew he had to take his place.

“here, let me drive. you’re not fit for driving. now, just be comfy back there, okay?”

—

hours later violent jolts of the car hit jaehyun’s cheek, regaining consciousness from his slumber just to witness the beautiful sunrise peeking from the horizon. he sat up, his posture trying to straighten to denumb nerves that held long during his sleep.

his playlist blasted the speakers. johnny had his legs on the dashboard and hummed with the music. mark was still sleeping peacefully like he hadn’t had a care in the world other than his precious bag of unfinished chips in his hands.

he groaned at the discomfort of pulled muscles and the sudden break to the countryside. if johnny needed an hour intervals for the drive he could’ve said so, right? but now they were at the open road, greenery and fields merging together in one land.

“what time is it? where are we and are we there yet? i’ll drive if what you do delays the journey.” jaehyun gestured him to move aside. “johnny, stop eating.” it was quarter to two.

“wha-? i’m hungry. hey, you’re the one who didn’t want to come and yet you’re rushing to get to the y/l/n’s?” johnny unwrapped his second burrito. “besides, we’re only five minutes away—”

“tsk ‘cause i need to piss real bad.” jaehyun was fidgety and panned the view before setting eyes on his friend.

johnny felt a churn in his stomach as his cheeks bubbled. “oh gross! i’m eating dude! if you’re gonna piss then do it outside?!”

jaehyun shoved the burrito into johnny’s mouth to not speak anymore. “rather hold it in than for you to puke in my car!” he held his strength while johnny fought his way to breathe properly. “i won’t piss outside and there are cattles who feed on fields!”

“bruh stop lecturing me with your vet knowledge- ah!” johnny held his forehead from the sudden finger flicking.

“dude, it’s called common sense. now move aside!” he shooed the tall boy off the driver’s seat. jaehyun stepped on the gas, heading towards a small town entrance.

they finally reached a couple of stores & restaurants, surveying and asking its townsmen using your family name to locate your residence. maybe they would know which apartment or house you resided in. except that was the twist of their understanding.

jaehyun and his boys were shocked to know how your family name plastered in posters and brand products displayed at open stores, but were more shocked to see the gazes from the people.

a little over an hour, they managed to get hold of more information as they were told your house was ten minutes away from the town. jaehyun walked along the pavement to grab something to drink, only to be poked by a young man who was around the same age as they were.

“hi.” he greeted the unfamiliar man. “i take it you’re looking for the y/l/n’s?”

he took a squint as he observed jaehyun from head to toe, circling around him. “uh-huh, you look like m’lady’s husband-to-be in the pictures.”

“e-excuse me?” jaehyun cleared his throat, seemingly unwilling to have this conversation going.

mark held his laugh per usual, it would take time to get used to jaehyun stumbling his words.

because the engaged man really wasn’t ready at all.

“yeap he’s the guy.” johnny popped the ‘p’ with a lollipop in his mouth. jaehyun rolled his eyes, taking the candy stick and tossing it away. he didn’t care about johnny’s scoffs.

the new young lad wore his motorcycle helmet. “sweet.” he prolonged the word. and that was when both mark and johnny lost it. they recalled the pun they entertain themselves with prior to arriving here.

“oh, i work with the town’s famous family,” he showed his i.d. wrapped around his neck. “you can follow me since i’m heading there too.” the three quickly twitched at his quick paced movement. “i’m kunhang by the way, but i’d rather be called hendery. it’s my professional name, it just sounds cooler.”

jaehyun furrowed his brows at the praise. “okay hendery, uhm famous? they’re big time?” he pointed at the posters holding your family name. “how so?”

hendery swung his face shield downwards. “you’ll see.”

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gallops of horses were drumming the entire farm. dust and dirt swirled with the wind in the air and it took a while for the boys to adjust their sights at the distance. hendery dropped a couple of spare boots for them to wear. jaehyun was in awe. horses were majestic animals and though he got to study them, he never seen such a number of them on the fields.

“oh goodness me our guest is here!”

they turned around to voice of a jolly lady, an apron on and folded cuffs from her clothing. “hello there! welcome! you must be jaehyun! my soon to be son-in-law!” she shook his hands and later pulled him for a hug. “oh you look just like your mother!”

“hi mrs. y/l/n. y-yeah, i get that a lot these days,” jaehyun scratched his head. “thanks for having us.”

her eyes trailed at mark and johnny, and they too, were pulled in for a hug. “i see jaehyun brought along his handsome friends with him! do enjoy your stay here with us!” she caught a glimpse of a figure approaching the crowd. “c’mere baby and meet the boys!”

jaehyun looked over his shoulder, lips parting and exhaled a short breath. she seemed young, she has a pretty face but obviously still in high school. what the? oh g- i’m marrying you?

“pfft no ew. i’m not getting married to you. i’m only 17.” she let out a chuckle, almost sarcastic enough for jaehyun to explode.

crap i said it unconsciously.

your mother lightly slapped her arm. “marg, where’s your sister?” she asked. “i told her to specifically come at the barn 1600.”

“she took jet for a ride. ‘detour’ she said, but i guess she’s on her way here.” she replied and mark choked on his water bottle. marg rolled her eyes. “green minded ass-”

“language marg!” hendery flicked her forehead, the latter held the pain. “the rudeness. sorry, kiddo here is the family’s baby. you’ll see the eldest daughter soon- oh! right on time m’lady!” he waved his hands up high.

jaehyun didn’t know what pissed him off more; one was at himself for being starstruck and in awe at you after his breakup, and two?

the beautiful black horse you were riding on didn’t seem to be halting. it was trotting at first. you were on its saddle. he squinted his eyes, were you smirking? unbelievable. he thought you were doing this on purpose. no, you were really going to run him over.

he noticed a change in speed, trotting then galloping on dirt. the sounds of it matched with the beatings of his rising heart. jaehyun took a step back, then it became more than one, until he was worried that he would end up being chased. there were couple of gasps and reminders of voices. he fell on his bum with palms hitting the ground as he breathed heavily, eyes still on you.

the horse listened to your rein, it let out a loud neigh with its front legs heavenwards. your laugh merged with it. “whoa- hey, easy jet, easy.” you cooed the animal, soon removing your helmet and hair flowed like those in shampoo commercials. “i think he got the message.”

jaehyun sat there dumbfounded, his brows drew together. what message? you were centimetres from killing him- wait. he saw you turn cold and your smile disappearing.

bingo! he got it. he knew the reason why you did this.

you were against the arranged marriage too.

johnny leaned into mark’s ear, who had his hands cupping his lower face. “bro, jet’s a horse so stop giggling and clean your mind.”

“dude i’m not laughing at that. just look at jae. i’ve never seen him so helpless.” he cackled a laugh.

once your feet were on the ground, he finally got a better look on you. you were wearing a light wooled grey sweater with denim blue jeans. your hair now on one side and boots stained with dried mud. you took off your gloves to put your hand out for a handshake, one rested around your helmet. “hi, i’m y/n.” you greeted with a smile, ensuring it was fake enough for jaehyun to notice.

“quite of an entrance.” jaehyun dusted his jeans and groaned at the exerted strength as he stood. “jeong jaehyun. veterinary medicine student..” he was about to grab your hand until you shoved yours into the pockets of your jeans.

“y/n!” your mom exclaimed with warning. “your manners-” she clamped her lips when you put up a hand, eyes darting at her later at him.

“alright, okay. look mr. i didn’t ask for your field of study and i don’t need to know or do anything with you.”

jaehyun crossed his arms, a fake smile plastered on his face. what an attitude. “apparently you will? because i’m here for the next thirty days.”

“is that so?” you hummed and jaehyun didn’t like how you singsonged.

he knew something was coming and sometimes he thought it was best to keep quiet instead of letting his annoyance towards you spark up. “good, that means you’re helping me out with everything i do here.” he heard you say. “and do things i tell you to.”

“what?” his eyebrows snapped, and for you it was quite entertaining to see this reaction from him. following the trail of your footsteps, jaehyun stomped on wet soil as he stood before you. “hey you can’t just order me around like i’m your staff!”

“of course i can, you’re in my property-” you gestured the land.

“no, it belongs to your parents.” the tone of his voice irked you. he was grinning too.

“i can do whatever i want and choose whenever to help. i’ll only listen orders from mr. and mrs. y/l/n if they want me to do work..” he trailed off, your mother waving at him with admiration— typical as she saw him like an long lost son. “..but i guess not. my mom did say i needed a break from studying too much and she’s totally right. i must be pardoned from labour.”

it was your turn to cross arms and give him a lop-sided smile. the audacity of this man. you felt like ripping all your hair out. “you think staying here would prevent you from doing labour, your highness? sitting on your throne all dignified and at peace? well guess what, just because you’re a guest that doesn’t mean you get to be treated differently-”

you heard him bubble out a forced snicker. what was it this time? “of course it’s different! i am the guy you’re betrothed to-”

“i won’t allow it.” your jaw tightened with lips in a hard line. “a person like you is not worth my time and definitely not someone i’d want to marry.”

he pursed his lips. “wow do people ever tell you how bad of a host you are? you just don’t go shoving assumptions into people’s faces for your own entertainment. we’re humans.”

“i’m only rude to you. and yeah, people are humans. but you’re the devil’s incarnate.” you pulled jet’s reins and led him to the stables in which jaehyun observed how you gave that same smirk from earlier. “see if you’ll enjoy your stay here, hubby.”

jaehyun clenched his fists and was sure little crescent moons already indented his palms. he only wanted sue to call him that. yet that was useless, they broke up. your face remained in his head and anger filled him up, now boiling so much that he felt a little lightheaded arguing with someone like you.

he wanted to yell but johnny and mark sandwiched him between them with hendery walking in front. “tsk it’s only the first day and i want to go home.” he scrunched his nose.

hendery had his palms behind his head, lips jutting to hold his grin. “m’lady—” he corrected himself. “y/n’s not usually like that. it’s a first seeing her so cranky and hotheaded.”

“really? how is she usually like?” mark asked with curiosity. “she seems cool because she smiled at johnny and me before the tables.. y’know, turned.” he shrugged with implications towards jaehyun.

“not cranky and not hotheaded.” hendery opened the door to your house, showing them to the large living area. “a lil’ different today but i tell you, our y/n is a professional equestrian. she’s passionate with what she does and—”

“a horse rider?! passionate?!” jaehyun hissed as he took off his shoes and brown coat, kicking it slightly to the side and hung it on the wall respectively. “she almost killed me!”

johnny hit the back of jaehyun’s head and clicked his tongue. “snap out of it jae, you’re overreacting. we’re at your future in-law’s residence and i think it’s a bad idea to badmouth their daughter.”

only a low groan escaped out of jaehyun as he refused to listen. “look, first impressions don’t always hit off a good start. but thinking how you both don’t have a say to this arranged marriage, your feelings towards each other are totally understandable.”

jaehyun pressed the bridge of his nose as he took in his friend’s words. if what johnny said was true, was it right for him to begin holding grudge on you on the first day? you barely knew each other. clearly he knew you hated him, yet if his parents were here and saw the whole thing, they’d ask: why risk the chance of not trying? and again, he remembered he was told, people can change.

—

throughout dinner, he got to know what your family business was and why it was well-known. he didn’t ask questions, they were just told to him like they were comfortable with it. they weren’t bragging either. perhaps it was due to the fact jaehyun would soon be part of this family that they told him the entire story.

you didn’t show up during the hour and honestly it got jaehyun feeling so much relief since he wouldn’t have to deal with another useless argument. he disliked wasting time and preferred to do this schedule accordingly, so remembering it only made him rage inside. he was glad he wouldn’t have to deal with you tonight.

except that relief was shortlived. you had to appear right when he thought of you.

great.

he tried to fix himself in his seat on the sofa by the fireplace, averting his gaze upon you while your mother continuously slapped you light on the arms. you probably finished your bath, given that you still have a towel wrapped around your head and a.. robe.

“y/n! have some courtesy! we have guests!” your mother warned as she gestured in front to cover you, apologising to the new boys. hendery immediately stepped in as well, his eyes shutting to a close and pushing you back to the bottom of the staircase.

“but mom! i’m hungry and there might not have any cookies left if you keep giving it to them-” you were cut off with hendery’s pats.

he brushed his hair. sighing, he had to shoo you away because you were clearly attracting eyes, definitely not the decent kind. “i have a jar prepared for you m’lady so please.. get dressed!”

you quickly ran up as you were told, mumbling and complaining. jaehyun and his friends were definitely at a loss for words. because not only were you careless, you were oblivious too.

mark scrunched his nose to start a conversation with jaehyun. “looks like she called you ‘hubby’ too quickly.” he closed his lips to contain his laugh.

“pfft jae your ears really are honest huh?” johnny pointed at them as he held his chest, fistbumping mark for another win.

he wasn’t going to tell them that he in fact did find you pretty, and the thing was, he shouldn’t be giving a reaction too soon. “it’s the spicy chocolate cookie!” jaehyun defended.

“huh, i didn’t bake any cookie with those flavour-” hendery pondered, but he stopped since he spotted jaehyun begging to help him here.

“you know that we know if you’re lying right?” the two squinted eyes, putting more pressure to the boy to admit what he felt when he saw you earlier. “bet ya felt something.”

afraid that your family could hear them, jaehyun grabbed their shoulders to huddle them in close. he cleared his throat to catch their attention, yet his friends continued their giggles. “i swear if you both embarrass me in front of the y/f/n’s, consider the days with your precious.. phones.”

“ah c’mon dude. don’t do that. we bought our i12’s together-” mark whined.

“then at least help me out here guys. i have a reputation to hold-”

“oh for being her hubby?” johnny gave a playful grin and soon was replaced with a nervous smile. “okay i’ll zip it.”

he heard your mother facetiming his mom, voices loud enough for him to know that there would be a huge gathering at christmas eve dinner. great, another one i have to deal with.

jaehyun put down his beanie and crossed his arms to snooze for a bit. he had too much going on in his head the whole day that maybe sleeping it off would let him calm down from all feelings he felt tonight. on the sofa, the weight beside him lowered, the scent of freshly baked cookies along with lavender perfume got him peeking under his beanie.

it was you, who looked like a squirrel happily munching away with your jar of cookies whilst eyes glued to the television.

he smiled a little to himself. so you can have this cute side-

fragments of sue’s face appeared in his mind. right. he was supposed to be heartbroken. he still was. a week into the breakup had remains to his heart. bothered with sue’s ultimatum and your annoying munches, he grabbed your wrists and out at the veranda.

it pissed him because it seemed like he was the only one who cared about both of your futures or actually would do something to change your families’ minds, where as you were carefree with your cookies. “hey!” you held the jar tight in your arms as you quickly slid your feet into your slippers. “rude! i’m eating!”

the rest of the people in the dining and kitchen area grew voices of woohoo’s, jaehyun’s pupils flared at their cheers. “just come with me for a second!” he hissed, turning the knob and closing the door.

“seriously jaehyun you can’t just ruin my happy time! what do you want-”

he looked in between the curtains from the outside, where he could faintly hear his friends talking the embarrassing things about him— especially how he felt for this arrange marriage. “aren’t you pressured or angry at the situation our parents have put us into?” he leaned against a column. “even my friends are joining the wagon.”

you cackled whilst scrolling your phone. “here i thought you only cared about animals, dr. jeong.” hearing how jaehyun scoffed at your comment, you shoved your device in your pockets. “and yes of course i’m mad! what they decided is so against my will.”

jaehyun stared at you and surprised that he actually felt exactly the same. “really? then let’s make a pact. sounds good?” he offered with arms folded while you still were occupied with your phone. “well?”

“why would i listen to you? as far as i know, we already clashed and hate each other.” you rolled your eyes. “what makes you think i’ll agree?”

he sighed. “y/n, i know you don’t want this, i don’t too. at least there’s something we have in common. i’m just thinking that we have to show them we’re not meant to be together. we both have lives we want to live without the other.”

there was a change in his voice. you could tell he was serious and trying to suggest something he’d want you to agree on. “fine, what’s the pact?” you gave an uninterested tone. probably a bad idea, you thought.

“like you said, ‘clash and hate each other’. we have exactly twenty four days to convince them that you, me, us?” he pointed at his chest then yours. “is impossible. twenty four days, it’s until the night of christmas eve.”

actually that’s not bad at all. “hm, that’s easy since i can’t stand you.” you said, now standing up to face him. “even better if we can do this in less than 24.”

“cool, we have to make our fights as natural as possible. no signals or heads-up. full-on make me angry and i’ll do the same. the more we argue the more they’ll believe there’ll never be an ‘us’.” his voice a bit lively than before. “i want my buds to be fooled into this too. just be realistic and- nghf!”

you shoved a huge cookie into his mouth. “tsk, you’re noisy. i get you so shut up. i agreed with the pact, but i have conditions, okay?”

jaehyun nodded as he chewed angrily with his eyes closed, though the cookies’ taste might’ve simmered down his temper towards you. “ha, then i have conditions too-”

“see you in the morning.” he heard you say as the door slammed with the attached bell ringing his ears.

now that was one of his conditions; no interrupting while he talks. he sighed seeing you head up the stairs. he sighed. “ugh, i can never marry a girl like her.”

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stretching as high as you can, the muscles loosened in every part of your body from riding yesterday. the sun shone its brightest despite the cold weather. you remembered the pact and you knew you would not let a day pass without bothering him. somehow his existence annoyed you to the bone, not even words were enough to explain how you felt.

at the farthest point your peripheral could reach, you spotted jaehyun peacefully— and actually enjoying— the hammock whilst faintly you heard mark and johnny debating which pronunciation was the correct one. fixing your boots as you walked towards them, the two scurried off to the side, noticing the stomps of your feet getting closer.

“get up.” you wriggled the hammock, causing it to be lop-sided.

jaehyun managed to balance himself from the swings. “what the-” his voice hitched. “you’re ruining my relax time!”

you pretended to ponder as you looked up to the sky. “hm, sounds awfully familiar, doesn’t it?” referring to his sudden action towards you the night prior.

“seriously y/n what do you want? i’m in no mood to do work today and i clearly told you last night-” jaehyun fixed his eyes onto your finger that silenced his lips.

jaehyun raised a brow and rolled his eyes. what was your deal? he thought. “condition number one.” you started, bringing your voice down. “starting today you’ll do the work for me and with me. considering you’re taking veterinary science, i’m guessing you know your ways through equine husbandry. so in the coming days you can check the horses’ health while i practice my rounds.”

ah, so that’s what this was about. “uh-huh, but my condition number one is you shouldn’t make me do labour unless you really need it.” jaehyun got off the hammock, chugging his glass of water like it’s one-shot. “it’s the first light, y/n. my service starts in the afternoon.”

“i see. you’re not a morning person.” you checked your nails.

“i so am! but it’s my month long vacation. let me enjoy this before i experience exploitation from you.” he forced a smile that made you want to push him off the veranda.

you walked down the steps and straight to the barn opposite from your house. “it’s either exploitation today or exploitation for the whole month.” you singsonged while you twirled in your stance. hearing him growl meant your tactic worked. “i’ll let you experience the beauty of country side, city boy.”

jaehyun’s brows narrowed as he followed you anyway, later looking back at his friends who were stifling a laugh. “did you just compare me to feces first thing in the morning?”

“did you just boggle up my brain with scientific terms?” you hid a giggle when you heard his friends finally bursting out and losing it. because they too, experienced jaehyun’s sudden blabber of uncommon usage of words, especially conversational-wise. “i made a pun but it seems like you acknowledge the nickname.”

“i did not!” jaehyun pressed his temples. “i may have misheard you but i didn’t acknowledge it! you’re too assuming!”

“mhm sure.. but you are stepping on one though.” you whistled and gestured mark and johnny to the stables.

jaehyun grumbled as he checked the soles of his shoes. indeed he stepped on it and licked his lips in annoyance that it’d be hard to clean it off. the door opened and hendery’s morning face only turned sour at the unsightly view. he tossed another pair of spare boots for him to wear before they both headed to where you all were.

hendery introduced the things they do here; feed the horses, fix their saddles repair them if damaged. they were minor things since your family did hire people to do them. and since you and him were professionals in equine sports, he mentioned you both spend all days practicing.

good, if it was you who toured him around the area, he wouldn’t think lasting a day with your intentions of ruining his mood. though it was part of the pact, it seemed like you enjoyed this a lot more than he expected. hendery brought him to places your family owned, land properties that expanded until the mountains. it’s no wonder you were free to roam around and unafraid of getting lost.

you made him do a lot. and he was glad he was able to handle, thank heavens. however he didn’t feel much of a challenge from any of them, where you claimed they were ones he couldn’t do. jaehyun lost track of time, the sky was his only companion to tell the hours and probably lost count of the tasks too. all he could remember was the endless bickering, yells and frequent eye rolls.

in all those, he still let you off the hook— first day of work and all, he has to be patient. and he wasn’t bothered with what you tasked him to do, until his friends stood behind you as you showed them the rest of the horses.

after you told him to move the bundles of hay he thought was the last, you were currently trying to make mark pet the horses as they were bobbing their heads towards the young man while johnny recorded his reaction.

“isn’t she all well now.” jaehyun rolled his eyes as he helped hendery lift the infinite bundles. “my friends get the leisure and i have to work?”

hendery laughed as he unbuttoned his collar. “she was told by her mom that you’ll be in her care since you both will get married eventually. plus mrs. y/f/n said it’s a way to get to know y/n too.” he explained, seeing you walk towards them with a hay cart, hands signalling your childhood friend to get some bundles from you. the final bundles were finally fed to the horses, and you skipped your feet to fetch jaehyun.

jaehyun knew you had intentions to make fun of him because the way you walked really pissed him off. so he decided to have his fun too. ”are you that weak you’re unable to carry a small patch? guess my hourly pay needs an increase.” he low-key flexed his muscles. truthfully speaking it was a sight to look at, too bad his attitude didn’t match it.

you rested on one leg while you look at him. he was testing the waters with you, smile slowly resurfacing as you gave even the slightest reaction towards him. oh it’s on. he annoyed you yesterday and would be a lot more in the next coming days. jaehyun leaned forwards that he was towering over you. his body made you feel small but that didn’t stop you from getting back at him.

“the only thing increasing for you is workload.” you hummed, putting back the cart into its place.

he glared at you as if you were dead meat. you ignored him. “i’ve had enough for today. muscles are sore.” hands in his pockets, jaehyun kicked the remains of hay off his shoes before he was stopped by you. “ugh you’re so annoying.” he clicked his tongue.

“nope, you’re not done until i am. we have to find materials for christmas wreaths at my grandpa’s up north.” you pointed at the mountains as you took hendery’s hands and soon mounted on jet with him.

“oh and i’m supposed to walk there while you’re so relaxed miss bossy?” jaehyun shook his head in disbelief looking at the distance.

“uh yes?” you laughed to yourself. “i don’t think you’ve ever ridden a horse before, but if ever you did, it’s probably at a carnival.”

sudden outbursts of emotions evident on his face now. “was i born under a rock? of course i’ve ridden!” he took the reins given to him by hendery. “and it’s not a carousel!”

for a while he had a certain confidence, his soles stepping on the stirrup and dimples deepening with the strength he gave to put his right leg over. but once that was done and high up off the ground, his heart beat an army per second. cash, hendery’s horse gave loud neigh. jaehyun had done this before as a child and definitely felt like one now. he should be able to handle a 30-minute journey.

jaehyun heard you giggling, perhaps he knew how hideous he looked. despite hendery seated behind you, you led the way for the most part of the ride. you were surprised to see jaehyun have gotten the hang of it. it pissed you a lot because he was vlogging with his phone— sputtering out words to keep the diss battle going. johnny and mark hopped on the available bikes, cycling on your sides, and their laughter rather calmed you than annoy you.

it pissed you a lot more because you’ve practically ran out of ideas to tell him in return. keeping quiet wasn’t your forte, you were a young woman with plenty of things to say, even more so to jaehyun. going through the woods, you signalled hendery to halt the horse for you and the rest of the boys followed you to gather the materials needed.

“this shouldn’t be too long to take.” jaehyun looked at the trees towering meters above him, then straight to you who was shaking head in disbelief. “we’re just taking the materials at your grandfather’s and head back, right?”

“did i mention my granddad?” you balanced yourself on large wood log. the tone of your voice started to warm up with bickers you weren’t able to tell him.

“you did!” jaehyun anticipated this and somehow he didn’t. “now lead the way to his place and we can get the hell out of here.” his eyes grew squints of disgust at his surroundings, as if he hadn’t been into the forest before. his friends went on ahead with hendery around the woods to look for what’s needed.

“nah, we’re picking acorns, pine cones, berries and other leaves by hand. his cottage is just around here but that doesn’t mean the materials are from him. let’s go, whiney.”

“oh my g-” jaehyun pulled you on the arm and off you went towards him. “y/n i’ve had enough for today and i’m so tired of taking your orders- i’m physically tired of doing things your way and i can’t think straight-”

“pecans?” you said as his eyes crossed to see your palms full of the shelled nuts. “you’re hungry, aren’t you? that’s why you’re so cranky and agitate-y.” placing one but onto a flat rock, you smashed it strong enough for it to crack yet not totally destroying the inside. you popped one into your mouth and gave the most taunting grin jaehyun has seen from you all day.

he was about to grab the rest of the nuts until you swung your arm that he wasn’t able to reach them. “y/n! give me some!” he yelled and the rest of your friends look at you both after hearing you laugh in the most evil manner.

“never!” you scurried off deeper into the woods. jaehyun rolled his eyes not at how fast you were, but due to how slow he actually was because of the amount of disgust he had.

he knew this would take all day and he didn’t know how long his patience can take for another three weeks with you.

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jaehyun couldn’t describe in words with what he experienced since arriving. if he had to compare with school, it was similar to studying and cramming for hours non-stop. it gotten him mentally exhausted, physically too. but the only difference between being cooping up in his room and doing work outdoors was the continuous nagging from you.

it was far from quiet. he could handle his mom’s high pitched yells. but you? anything that came from you or done by you made him want to plaster a duck tape on your lips. you were as annoying as a five year old child who looked for someone vulnerable to bully. unfortunately he became your prey because he was in your lands. and though there were times he was able to banter back, he always felt you still had the upper hand.

it was all sunny and good days out in the countryside and jaehyun found that fact the only bright side. he enjoyed it every single morning. yet sometimes good sunny mornings meets its bad, that is, when grey clouds destroyed the beauty of the sky. in this case, it was you. you were far from his dream girl— sue. she was elegant, poised and had a heart of gold. you were the complete opposite who’d rather be rogue and do things your way. other than completing ten christmas wreaths and feeding the horses or more farm work, he couldn’t remember what he did for the past eight days because all that entered his mind was the dictator you.

but today he felt different, maybe things wouldn’t be as hard than last week. he felt good. he sat at the long dining table with all morning faces exposed. it was currently 7 a.m and your mom have already prepared breakfast. and per usual, you were the only one they waited for before they start the first meal.

“marg, is your sister still asleep?” your mother put down a large casserole to warm up everyone’s stomach in winter.

marg only shrugged because for one, she didn’t care, and two, she stated that it wouldn’t be her doing this since jaehyun was marrying you. “oh jaehyun. please do head upstairs to her room and awake y/n up.”

“and why do i have to do this?” jaehyun mumbled to himself and johnny nudged him on the arm. he groaned and got up, his stomps were heavy and unwilling.

once he was in front of your door, he knocked twice loudly so he wouldn’t have to spend so much time to get you. there was a small tune playing in your room, like it was from a music box. the door was already opened. he peeped through the thin gap, seeing you still sleeping soundly. goodness’ sake, he thought, and entered the room since your mother was asking if he woken you up.

your room was in fact, neat. all things were organised and arranged. if there was one thing he learned from you other than being an ass, was that you loved stuffed animals. not a hint of dolls or barbies or any toy displayed related to that spectrum. two lines of medals displayed and they all shone in gold. plaques had your names and young portraits of you with smiles of victory. hendery wasn’t lying when he said you were a professional. he wasn’t going to lie— you were impressive despite the little horns coming out of your head.

he stood next to your bed where you were all bundled in a huge blanket. he raised a brow, it was strange for you to have two thick blankets covering you. “hey y/n.”

no response.

“y/n. wake up, your mom is calling for breakfast and you’re usually the first one seated at the table.” he wriggled your body with the butt of the umbrella and you didn’t budge.

“she baked croissants and aren’t they your favourite? dipped in chocolate ganache and sprinkles?” he tried sounding happy. note that, he tried.

this girl.. he bit the insides of his lips, spotting the markers in a cylinder container and took one to begin drawing on your face. his soft giggles filled your room and the strong scent of markers met your nostrils, waking you from your slumber.

“what the he- jaehyun?!” you hissed at how close his face was to yours, failed to realising he was done drawing on your morning skin. “get away from me!”

everyone downstairs could hear the both of you, arguing like cats and dogs. each footstep might’ve covered the entire floor above them and the ceiling could give in.

“you ruined my morning with your ugly face!” “what?! you’re more ugly, ugly!” “you entered my room?! you have no rights!” “breakfast’s ready and your mom asked me to!” “well my nose could’ve smelled mom’s food but i smelled your stinky breath instead!”

“whatever, i finished your share of croissants!” jaehyun quickly head down the staircase.

“you dare eat my food?!” you still had a blanket from head to toe as you followed him down. “no one takes my food!”

“your loss since you’re still in bed you lazy ass!” jaehyun sat beside johnny and continued his meal. “and you were snoring loud too-”

“i did not- agh!” you grumpily sat and immediately eyed the last croissant sitting at the center of the table. all eyes were on you with black ink scribbled on your face.

there was an awkward silence then you felt jaehyun’s stare at the only food you wanted for breakfast. there was a back and forth battle of stares between you, him and the food. maybe it was the slow reflexes you have in mornings that jaehyun took the bread before you did. he stuck out a tongue as he deliciously ate half of it, chewing slowly just to let you imagine the flavours of sweet silky chocolate. you could feel yourself drooling and the cravings of your stomach rising up to your throat. every chew he did was a stab to your guilty-pleasure heart.

jaehyun stopped and gave a smug grin. “you wanted this y/n?” his question sounding a song rather than an honest one. “all you have to do is beg.”

you gulped, rolling your eyes. “shut up!” you kicked his knee out of jealousy and savoured the soup instead.

“ow!” he hissed through a laugh and looked at your mom. “mrs. y/f/n, i’d like to know the recipe for this. do you give lessons?” jaehyun licked the remains of chocolate around his lips, hopefully it was enough to cover up the violence you did under the table.

your mother giggled at his sweet talk. “why learn it from me when you have y/n to teach you?”

you choked on your soup and tear your gaze away from jaehyun to your mother, where she was already enjoying your shocked reaction. “oh give me a private lesson, bulldog terrier.” he propped his chin and mimicked clicks as if he was calling animal.

you quickly touched and rubbed your face to see the ink contaminate your fingers. the spoon reflected the dark circle around your right eye. “oh my g- you! this will be hard to remove!” the fork around your hand pointed directly at him.

“y/n!” hendery put down your wrists as jaehyun laughed loud. you took the wet wipes marg gave you and whined a little whilst you stood by the mirror behind jaehyun.

“don’t be so bummed out honey.” your mom assured, giving a wink to jaehyun. “it’s a small prank. marg did it to you before.”

checking yourself for the last time at the mirror, you rolled your eyes. “i have enough patience for marg,” with one hand you cupped jaehyun’s lower face from the chin spreading to the cheeks, soon pinching hard on his dimples with a pointer finger and thumb. “but none for the human bread.”

“ow don’t touch me!” jaehyun swifted his head to look at you and he saw you flashed a smile like you were satisfied.

“a human bread with molds. ew, i lost appetite so i’ll be out for a ride.” you stood up to grab your coat. “see ya ugly.”

“remember to you have to clean the barn house y/n!” your mom called out.

“yeah got that!”

johnny and mark bent their heads down and let their friends suffer from multiple dots on his faces. what made it funnier was that jaehyun munched happily on his meal, hadn’t gotten a single clue. he then eyed you when you passed the window and straight to the stables. “isn’t it too early for practice?” he drank his cup of hot chocolate.

“she can ride all day. sometimes she doesn’t arrive home and the next morning you see her sleeping in the barn house.” marg tied her hair into a high bun. “the amount of dedication is there, except the passion she used to have isn’t really there anymore- hey!” she glared at hendery who gave her a warning look.

what was that all about? jaehyun thought while his eyebrows met together and good thing it wasn’t obvious to your family. he was indeed curious, but he’d rather hear it from you than to look like a jerk who wanted to gossip about personal lives. the thing was, it’s you. though majority of the week was him suffering with workload, he liked to bicker with you until you gave up and had nothing to say.

so far he recorded as 5-11 in terms of owning the other. the latter was his score and he was proud of it.

hendery’s phone vibrated and slid it to jaehyun’s place. jaehyun blinked to adjust his sight to the brightness of the phone. a sigh came out of his lips and the rest of them could tell it was another order from you. “ooh that doesn’t sound good.” mark slurped his soup.

“it’s not.” jaehyun brushed his hair and hesitation slowly crept his body. “she asked me to clean the upper floor of the barn by the time she arrives.”

—

jaehyun massaged his wrists by twisting them. he looked at the barn house’ entrance because he noticed a figure approaching. you’ve had the best morning after jaehyun ruined it. as you rode, nothing beats the freshness of the cool wind. you love riding through the woods and grasslands. it sets you free from everything keeping you caged. your smile began to falter when you saw jaehyun who was not even halfway close to finishing. “you’re late. your mom had to apologise on your behalf because i’m doing the job for you.”

“ooh thanks! i’ll count on it!” you laid comfortably on a chair.

“hey!”

you leaned against the furniture, arms crossed where he was a floor above and standing at your 2 o’clock view. “dr. jeong it looks like you’re having a hard time. need help?” you stifled a laugh because he still has the ink marks you left on his face.

“on with the assumptions again, aren’t we?” he fixed his gloves and moved wooden planks from one place to another.

“yeah you make yourself too easy of a target, jaehyun. and i thought you’re the type to not take things seriously.” you tied jet’s reins to a pole.

“you’re forgetting my condition number two, you can only badmouth me if the others are around. now get your flat butt up here and move the tool box aside so i can continue what i’m doing.” he grunted whilst lifting.

dusting your pants, you were now standing a storey high. the sight of the height below you made you sick. jaehyun nudged your arm and you took the items blocking his way. you sighed and he noticed how fidgety you were. he put up a small smile. his entertainment from you didn’t end at the breakfast table.

he scooted closer to you, pretending to bump into you with the pile of tall wooden planks in his arms. he heard you hiss, and that was the signal to begin. “oops didn’t see you there shorty.” there was a change in his voice, a more aggressive type of approach.

“you’re doing that on purpose.” you checked the pained area of your forearm.

“what if i’m not? it could be an honest mistake.” he tilted his head away from the wood to see you.

a held-in soft disbelief laugh came out of your lips. “honesty doesn’t really blend in well with you.”

jaehyun gasped with arched brows. “wow i’m very offended— you think this face..” he largely gestured himself. “would ever lie?”

“if you want to hear me saying you’re handsome.. it’s not happening.“ you took the rope to hang on a nail.

“but you did say it.” he singsonged and you could push him off the loft but that could only happen in your head.

“then that’s an honest mistake.” you flashed a forced smile at him. you carried the boxes stacked upon one another. “if you have a huge ego like that i bet you never dated. no girl would ever date you.”

jaehyun fell silent, his mood to bash you suddenly changed. the shifts in his steps became heavier and as if he was putting his anger upon them. he didn’t like being reminded of sue, even if you unconsciously did so. “can’t you just keep quiet as you work? do you always have something to say? keep your damn mouth shut if you think all the fun you get is from belittling people.”

“okay sheesh sorry i didn’t know you have a heart for people too.” you removed your helmet to relieve the discomfort from it.

as time passed— two hours to be exact, the more your guilt begin to seep in you. jaehyun never spoke after that. silence was like death at this point. not a hint of sniffs and sighs from him. did you go too far that he actually chose not to talk anymore? all you thought about was the pact he suggested. what now? anyone could appear any moment.

this wasn’t like you at all. you hesitated to talk to him and to give the first move to bicker. you stood there staring at him piling boxes after boxes and sweeping the floor where dust accumulated like piles of sand. you bit your lips because screw this, you hated this atmosphere, you hated this silent treatment. “j-jaehyun?” you called out.

nothing.

“hey-”

“hm? guilt eating you up now?” you froze at his voice as he chuckled. “it has, hasn’t it? look at your face!” he was laughing, his hands holding his ballooning stomach. “y/n you should’ve seen yourself!”

your gaze followed his hands that quickly took his phone placed at one corner. he was recording and your obliviousness blinded you. “oh you have no idea how much i wanted to laugh! my cheeks hurt so bad! hahaha!”

“you’re not using that to blackmail me!” you strided towards him.

he put his arm high as you struggled to reach it. “i might as well do that thanks for the idea!” faintly you heard his friends coming to check as to why their friend had the laughter of the century, only to find you both bickering again like this morning.

“delete that video jaehyun! i mean it!” “not until you agree to clean the loft!” “that’s like telling me to do everything!” “then that’s exactly what i’m telling you to do!”

johnny put up his phone to recording the struggling you and jaehyun enjoying his time to take advantage of his height. “dude i’ve never seen jaehyun this happy since sue broke up with him.”

“yeah his dimples are legit showing it’s scary me.” mark squinted at the two of you.

jaehyun swung his arms to avoid your attempted catches. he scrunched his nose and although that was undeniably cute, you couldn’t afford to feel humiliated for another two weeks. “jaehyun please delete it!”

“it’s not convincing enough you know?” “stop joking around we could fall!” you hissed. “fall?! then stop trying to get my phone!” “then put down your ridiculously long arm!” “yours are just too short!” “i swear— delete the footage!”

“you have to sound like you beg for it—” he cackled and with a few stretches you managed to reach his wrists as you lunged forwards. “oi stop!” that one last reach only made jaehyun lose his balance and fell backwards.

and all you heard were yells of worry.

to say that you both gladly fell on soft pillows of hay was an understatement. at least that what it looked like to your friends. jaehyun was shocked, his arm felt numb. he took a good look at you and there you were laying on his arm with pale lips. “hey, you okay?” his hands were already out to help you. “y/n—”

“m’lady!” hendery rushed to you, causing jaehyun to flinch at the tone of his voice. he gently took your right arm, but you gritted your teeth and asked him to take the left. “painful?”

“not that serious.” you said, feeling the stares from jaehyun. “ew don’t look at me like that. i’m fine, really. let’s just call it a day.” you gave a small smile and he wasn’t buying it.

because jaehyun saw you clung onto hendery for dear life.

#jung jaehyun #jung yoonoh #nct jaehyun #nct 127 #jaehyun oneshot #jaehyun #jaehyun nct #jaehyun x reader #jaehyun au #jaehyun scenarios #jaehyun writings #jaehyun imagines

374 notes · View notes

sanderssideswriting · 3 years

Text

ship: prinxiety, background intrulogical

genre: fluff

warnings: swearing, like one sexual innuendo, very breif mention of murder (as a joke, this is fluff after all)

summary: Radio AU where Virgil runs the 11-1 am radio on his college and every night someone calls to complain about his music selections and request disney, and Virgil never plays disney.

Virgil sat in his swivel chair and put on the headphones “sup bitches I’m back and this time with like three monsters because finals are a bitch and sleep can suck my dick. The first song of the night is Lotta True Crime by Peneople Scott. Why? Because I say it is that’s why.” Virgil put the song on and worked on his final project as the songs played.

The phone rang and Virgil groaned and checked the number. This dick again. He picked up and put it on air since people seemed to love listening to him and disney guy argue.

“listen asshole if you want to listen to Disney so fucking badly then apply for a spot and stop calling me.”

there’s a laugh “how about you just play some disney then? if you do I’ll stop calling. Because your music taste sucks.”

Virgil rolls his eyes “bitch apply for an opening and have a disney hour. And let me listen to my music, because not everyone loves fucking disney.”

“Well many people do so why not play one song.”

Virgil snorts “first no, and second if I had to I’d make everyone regret it and play let it go.”

“Let it go is great!”

“bye bye Princey, stop calling”

Virgil hung up “and since Princey called you know what we’re playing? MCR because I know he hates it. So this one’s for you princey, up next after this ad because this place needs money. By the way if you’re not a broke bitch donate because this job is like kinda decent and I like making you all listen to the music I like. Blood by MCR is up next” Virgil played the ad and leaned back in his chair.

“Why do you take his calls if you know he’ll just be annoying?” Janus asks in class.

Virgil shrugs “since it started I get more listeners which is good for the station.”

“I think it’s funny, cause you two have cute pet names for each other, princey and emo nightmare” Remus says.

Virgil elbows him “they’re not pet names.”

“they are,” Janus says, moving so Virgil couldn’t elbow him.

Roman waits to dial the number, he had to admit he sort of enjoyed his and emo nightmare’s conversations, who refused to reveal his name or grade.

At first they’d been annoying and he’d genuinely complained about all the emo music and asking to play disney but it’d soon become a nightly ritual, that had very quickly ruined Roman’s sleep schedule.

He dialed the number “seriously, why all the emo music, emo nightmare?”

“you just answered your own question princey, why the obsession with disney songs princey? See? Sounds fucking stupid.”

Roman sighs dramatically “you wound me emo nightmare. But seriously what’ll it take to get you to play ONE disney song?”

“a hundred grand, that’s how much the station needs to keep running, do that and I’ll play ONE disney song.”

“four.”

“Three songs and a hundred and fifty grand, fifty grand per song. final offer. and I get to pick the songs.’

Roman nods “deal,”

“oh and, you have until the end of finals to get the money donated, and I’ll make the gofundme, not you.”

That’s like a month and a half away Roman thinks I’ll have enough time. “sure thing emo nightmare.”

Roman’s emo hung up. He smiles like an idiot.

“Why not ask him out? it’s clear you’re fond of him” Roman’s roommate Logan says from his side of the room.

“ask out a guy I don’t even know the name of? yeah sure” Roman snorts.

“what? Scared you’ll be rejected? I cannot believe I’m saying this, but Roman I am getting more dick then you have been ever since you started talking to your radio boy.” Logan says in an even tone.

Roman pretends to gag “you don’t need to tell me how much you and my brother have done it Logan, you two being together is enough for me to want to bleach my eyes.”

“you’re no better whenever you’re going out with someone, or even hooked up with a slightly above average guy.”

Remus barged in “Loooo I need help studying.”

Roman stood up “that’s my queue to leave.”

Remus watches Roman go “so what where you two talking about?”

“oh you know, he’s still calling the campus radio station to ask for disney songs” Logan says.

“Wait, Roman is Princey?” Remus asks, he starts laughing

“Yes? You didn’t know?”

Remus cackles “no! oh this is great! My best friend Virgil does the 11 to 1 radio, he’s Emo Nightmare and Roman is his Princey”

“We could set them up, Roam is so lovesick, I swear he’s head over heels for him and he hasn’t even met Virgil” Logan says.

Remus gasps “this is why I love you! Of course we’re going to set them up.”

Logan and Remus came up with a plan, they’d invite Roman and Virgil to a study session and then never showed up, leaving Virgil and Roman to wait.

Virgil puts on his headphones and starts loudly playing panic at the disco and reading over his shitty notes.

Someone taps him on the shoulder “hey can you turn the emo shit down, I’m trying to study and it’s really loud.”

Virgil turns it down a bit “that good?”

he nods “yeah, where you also ghosted for a study session?”

“Yeah I was, my best friend and his nerdy boyfriend where supposed to help me study, they probably forgot all about me.” Virgil says.

“Logan And Remus? Remus is my brother and Logan’s my roommate” Roman says.

“Yeah, well since we’re both here we could study together if you want” please say no please say no.

“Sounds good!” Roman says.

Fuck.

Virgil and Roman studied for awhile and Virgil very slowly started warming up to Roman. “ah shit I have to go, see you round I guess” Virgil says packing up his stuff, he wanted to have some alone time before his shift.

“ok Bye Virgil,” Roman says packing up, he had to go do his own thing, which would probably end up becoming a quick nap before his emo nightmare started his turn being the radio host.

Virgil sat in the chair “what up bitches, so far the goal has 10k, so no disney tonight, or ever because this is on a time crunch and 150k is a fuck ton of money for broke college students. And now onto Fuck you by Lily Allen. Why? Because she’s underrated and because I said so.” Virgil played the song.

Virgil got the call around 12:30 “you’re calling later then usual princey, and no, no disney tonight.”

“Oh I was just about to ask. And also I was asking how to find the gofundme.”

“It’s on the UCLA radio website, can’t miss it. Now let me do my fucking job” Virgil hung up and played MCR as was tradition.

What he didn’t know was Roman recorded the phone call and posted it everywhere he could anonymously and waited.

Virgil checked the go fund me in the morning “it has fifty k already?! What the fuck? Princey what did you do?”

Virgil waited for the nightly call “Hey what the fuck how is the goal at sixty k? How the fuck princey?”

He laughed “I asked the internet for help, I think most of it’s from tiktok, you’re going to have to play disney emo nightmare”

“fuck you princey and your stupid obsession with disney.”

“you have an obsession with my chemical romance and Brendon Urie”

“name three other artists I play on here then bitch.”

“Mother Mother, Lily Allen and as of late Derivakat” Roman says without hesitation.

Virgil was speechless for a second, then hung up. “fucking bitch, you guys know what time it is” he played Teenagers.

A week and a half passed and the funds had slowly been going up, and Virgil and Roman’s calls continued nightly as usual.

Virgil and Roman met up a few times to study for finals, sometimes with Remus and Logan, sometimes without.

the goal just barely missed the end of finals. Virgil smirked “No disney today, or ever because you people missed the goal byyyyy” Virgil checked the go fund me “three thousand dollars. I’d say better luck next time but there won’t be a next time.” he chuckled. The phone rang and Virgil picked up, knowing it was Princey.

“oooh too late princey no disney songs during my shift.”

“you might want to check the gofundme one last time my dear emo nightmare.”

Virgil refreshes the page “first of all, I’m not yours bitch second- what the fuck, how?” the goal had been met.

Roman laughs “play the disney emo. Play. The fucking. Disney.”

Virgil could tell he was gonna gloat so he hung up.

Virgil grumbles and gets the disney queued “ok fine the goal was met, so time for my suffering, I have queued Fixer Upper from Frozen because it’s a shitty song with a shitty message. Make a man out of you because I like Mulan and for everyone’s inconvenience I have How Far I’ll Go so have fun with that stuck in your head.”

Roman was a bit insulted when Emo nightmare hung up on him, so he called him back once the songs had ended “wasn’t so hard was it?”

“for you maybe, it was for me,” Virgil hung up and blocked the number.

Over the Summer both Virgil and Roman found themselves missing their talks. Roman so much so he applied for one of the newly opened spots for the next semester from 2-5 pm.

Virgil drove onto campus at 4, putting on campus radio and was met with disney. the song ended and the new host spoke “and I hope everyone liked that, up now is a short commercial break.”

Virgil nearly swerved off the road and pulled over and called the station.

Roman picked up. “Hey what the actual FUCK?” Virgil says as soon as he does.

Roman laughs “oh how the tables have turned Emo Nightmare”

“I hate you, I fucking hate you what the actual fuck princey”

he laughed more “You yourself said that working here is nice, and there was an opening, so I took it. You should be happy, I mean now I won’t brother you about playing disney.”

Virgil frowned “yeah yeah, whatever princey have fun with that.”

“oh I will emo nightmare, I absolutely will.” Roman hung up feeling happy in a way he hadn’t felt all summer.

Virgil unpacked his stuff in his new dorm, he was a little pissed but also excited. Maybe he and princey would finally meet face to face. Why am I excited about that? I hate him, at the least he annoyed me every day for months, but he did raise a bunch of money. Even if his disney obessed ass is super annoying.

Roman walked in at 6 “hey Virgil, I’m guessing you’re going to be my roommate?”

Virgil looked up from his laptop “I guess, don’t take my monsters from the fridge and we’ll be golden, or blast disney 24/7″

Roman chuckled “what do you have against disney?”

“Micky Mouse killed my parents in front of me after I said that Merida was my favorite princess.” Virgil said dryly.

Roman chuckled “that’s why I dedicated my life to the mouse.”

“That’s why I swore to get my revenge on the mouse.”

“I won’t blast disney 24/7 but you can’t blast your emo music.” Roman says

Virgil snorted “dude I have the worst anxiety I don’t even own a speaker. so you don’t blast your music, I won’t blast mine and we’ll be fine.”

“Deal,”

Roman called that night like always and Virgil was ready “aww Princey, did you miss me that much?”

“not really, but I’m still trying to get you to willingly play a disney song.”

Virgil rolled his eyes “you know what, it’s a new year, time for a new leaf, I’ll humor you princey and play a disney song.”

“wait really?”

Virgil queued up Mad At Disney “no.” he hung up and the song started.

Virgil and Roman went back to their usual routine of lowkey flirting with each other during Virgil’s shift, and sometimes during Roman’s.

They where getting along well as roomates but hadn’t figured out that they where each other’s Princey and emo nightmare.

Somehow he and Princey had gotten into an argument about if Cruella would be a good or bad movie. Roman had hope it would be, Virgil wasn’t so convinced.

“Princey, she is a completely evil character, she can’t be redeemable, she shouldn’t be. She wanted to make puppies into a coat, that’s fucked up. There’s no black and white she’s bad and that’s that.”

“Maybe if you gave the movie a chance!”

“fuck no! did you not hear what I just fucking said?”

“then how about we see it then we can see who’s right?”

“fine, I’m free at three this Satuday.” Virgil said, way too caught up in the moment.

“same, see you then emo nightmare, I’ll be by the doors waiting.”

“fine, but I’m going to be right.”

“then it’s a date!”

“I guess it is!” Virgil hung up.

he didn’t realize he’d said yes to going out on a date with a guy he didn’t even know until the next day.

The whole campus was freaking out about it since the station had blown up quite a bit because of Virgil and Roman’s nightly arguments.

Roman left early, he’d dressed up a bit, and had a disney shirt with a little crown logo on it, it wasn’t that obvious but he figured it’d be telling enough.

Virgil put on a bit more eyeliner then usual and fishnets under his ripped jeans but that was about it, he chose to be petty and waited until about 3:20 to go to the doors where Roman wait waiting.

Virgil walked passed him at first. Roman saw him “emo nightmare?”

Virgil stopped “are you fucking kidding me?” he got a few glares from parents. “You’re princey? my fucking roommate?”

“I did not plan that, but yeah I am, and you’re my emo nightmare.”

Virgil rolled his eyes “still not yours princey, come on the movies about to start.”

They exited the movie and Virgil grinned “I fucking told you it’d be bad, I told you!”

“yeah yeah, you did it was bad. Want to get some coffee?”

“sure, I’ll pay,” Virgil said casually.

Roman grinned “I’ll win you over one day my emo nightmare.”

“stop begging me to play disney music and maybe you will.”

#roman sanders #virgil sanders #sanders sides #thomas sanders #sander sides #prinxiety #roman x virgil #roman sanders x virgil sanders

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morningfears · 3 years

Text

Hiking

Rating: PG-13 (Language, mostly)

Summary: College!Luke and hiking for the 10k celebration.

Word Count: 2.1k (...this was supposed to be a drabble, whoops)

“Tell me why we’re doing this again.”

You listened to the crunch of gravel beneath Luke’s feet, a signal that he was rounding the car to meet you at the trunk, and bit back a laugh as you reached for the extra water bottle you’d packed because you knew that he was going to forget his own. He’d been whining since you picked him up, a pout on his lips and sunglasses perched on his nose, and you knew that he’d stop the moment you truly got annoyed with him.

For now, though, you were enjoying making fun of him just as much as he was whining.

“It was my turn to pick our activity. I like to hike.” You pressed the bottle into his hands, a saccharine smile on your lips, before you closed the trunk and shrugged. “I also like to see you miserable.”

He turned his head toward you, bright blue eyes hidden by the sunglasses he’d snagged from you years ago, and scowled. “You owe me pancakes for this. It’s so early.”

“It’s nearly ten, Luke.” He waved a hand dismissively when you scoffed, unashamed of his status as the late riser in your friendship, and leaned against the car to take a sip of his water. “Don’t drink too much. If you puke on me, I will murder you. No one will find your body up here.”

Luke snorted at that, his hands moving to tighten the cap on his water bottle before he waved them at the nearly full parking area. “There are literally fifty other people on this trail right now. Someone would find me.”

“Shut up and start moving, yeah?”

Luke breathed an exaggerated sigh and made a show of dragging his feet, sending dust and rocks flying in his wake, but followed you toward the trail. He was joking - that much he made clear when he cracked a grin at your laughter - and you knew that he had no intentions of making the hike miserable for either of you. He was annoyed to be awake so early on his only day off but there was no one he’d rather spend the day with.

And, besides, it wasn’t the first time he’d gone hiking with you.

The first time Luke went hiking with you, you were both freshmen in college and equally shy. You were a friend of a friend of a friend - Ashton was dating your roommate’s older sister - and had somehow gotten roped into going hiking with the group of them. It was Ashton’s idea, to drag all of you out to the middle of nowhere right before fall break, and Luke had only tagged along because Calum and Michael dragged him.

While you weren’t exactly the most social of the bunch, it was clear that you and Ashton were the only ones who’d actually hiked before. Whereas everyone else showed up in black, wearing various old band t-shirts and, in Michael’s bad judgement and mildly hungover case, jeans, the two of you wore actual gym gear and appropriate shoes.

Luke quickly fell to the back of the pack, happy to be away from the chatter and the attention as he struggled up the mountain, and somewhere along the trip, you fell back with him. He knew that you were capable of beating them all up the mountain - and probably back down, if he had to wager a guess - but you kept pace with him and never even made a face at the sweat that made his t-shirt stick to his skin.

You were halfway up the mountain before either of you spoke - to everyone’s surprise, it was him; he complimented the All Time Low sticker on your water bottle - but it seemed as if neither of you knew how to shut up after that moment.

Your friendship formed quickly, bolstered by your commonalities and strengthened by your differences. If you weren’t in class or at work, you were at Luke’s. And if you weren’t there, the pair of you could usually be found elsewhere together.

When he moved into a frat house and you moved into an apartment, nothing changed. The brothers knew you, just as your roommates knew him, but your nearly nightly outings - to diners, to the movies, to the mall, to the park near campus - shifted to once a week activities that you took turns planning once you both delved deeper into your respective majors.

Luke was your best friend, just as you were his, and you were grateful for the strange hike that brought him into your life. That was, however, to everyone’s surprise, all that you were.

You had a small crush on Luke when you met - even drenched in sweat and struggling to keep himself upright, trudging up the side of a mountain he was cute - but the more you got to know him, the greater your crush grew. He was everything you’d always wanted, all wrapped in an adorable package, but you told yourself early on that you weren’t going to push; whatever happened with Luke, happened.

You knew, deep down, that Luke felt the same. You saw the way that he looked at you when he thought you weren’t looking. You saw the way he blushed when you complimented him or the way he grew flustered whenever anyone pointed out how cute the two of you would be together. Neither of you hid your feelings well but you were content to see where things went.

You always said that you’d rather have him in your life as just a friend than not at all.

Your line of thinking had recently undergone a bit of a shift. You were both approaching your senior year; two semesters away from the great unknown. Luke had plans to stay in the city and work for a record company. You were weighing your options to continue your education and considering leaving to give life elsewhere a shot.

It hurt, thinking that you’d be separated from Luke after so long of him being your only constant, but you knew that you either needed to make a move or move on.

“Alright, you haven’t said a word in almost a mile. Stop thinking, start talking.”

Luke’s words, said through huffs of air forced past his lips, broke you from your thoughts and you blinked when you noticed just how far down the trail you’d made it. You were glad you’d chosen one so familiar - the one you hiked the first time you met and found yourself returning to, time and time again - as you’d mostly relied on muscle memory to make it this far.

“Nothing to talk about. Just stressing over that Media Law final. Baker’s a dickhead and is going to make it unnecessarily difficult.” You knew that you should tell Luke the truth, spill your worries as you normally did, but you couldn’t force the words out.

It was easier this way, to continue on as you had for the past few years, and pretend that the heartache blossoming in your chest wasn’t real.

“Bullshit.” Luke stopped, nudged you to the side of the trail to let others pass, and met your eyes to search them. “That was your sad face. Baker gets the mad face. What’s up? You know you can talk to me about anything, right?”

“Of course I do, Luke.” The words fell past your lips readily, confident and clear, because you knew that. You knew that you could talk to Luke about absolutely anything and he would be there to listen. You knew that he’d never judge or laugh, not if it was a serious discussion, and that helped calm the raging sea of emotions in the pit of your stomach.

But nothing could quell the ache that settled in your bones when he looked at you the way he was.

He had a habit of looking at you like you were the one who hung the stars and moon. His eyes, usually unfocused as he zoned out, were clear and bright and shining with an admiration that rolled off him in waves. Whenever he looked at you like that, right in the eye, he always had a hand on you in some way. This time, he had one hand on your shoulder and the other cupping your cheek.

“What happens next May?”

Luke blinked, confused by the question. “Next May? After graduation?” When you nodded, your eyes flicking between his own and the sand beneath your feet, he shifted his weight and nodded slowly. “I’m staying here and you… You’re going to do something amazing. You might stay here, you might move to fucking Siberia. But whatever you do, you’re going to do it well because that’s just the kind of person you are, honey. You can’t half-ass anything, even if you try.”

Luke grinned when that got a small laugh but it was quickly replaced with a frown when you shook your head. “That’s not what I meant.” You trailed off, almost embarrassed to ask, before the words escaped your lips in a near whisper. “What happens to us?”

That was a question Luke had long considered. He, too, wondered what would happen to you both as you moved into the working world and farther away from one another. He wondered what would happen if you left the city. He wondered how he would continue on without seeing you every day.

And he realized that he didn’t want that.

“We’ll still be us,” he answered finally, his voice just as quiet as yours had been. “We’ll see each other every minute we can and if you decide to go somewhere else, we’ll FaceTime so much that we might as well just livestream our lives to each other. If you leave, I’ll come visit whenever I can and you know you’ll always have a place to stay with me if you want to come back. Nothing will change for us after graduation because I love you and I won’t let it.”

Before you could speak, before you could ask him if he really believed that was possible, Luke continued speaking.

“You know that I mean that in every sense of the word. You’re my best friend and I love you but you know that I also love you with a capital ‘L’. Being friends with you is something I’d never change but I don’t want to spend our last guaranteed year together wondering what could be. I don’t want to just dream about kissing you, I want to actually kiss you. I want to wake up to you asking me to go hiking and kiss you to convince you to stay in bed. I want to hold your hand and wake up beside you every morning. I want to be the annoying couple everyone already thinks we are because it’s us. And it always has been.”

It felt as if a weight was lifted from your chest as Luke rambled, words spilling past his lips in a rush. He was passionate, certain, and braver than you ever could be. He took the first step, just when you were beginning to think neither of you would ever make it there, and the only way you could think to respond was with a kiss.

Pressing your lips to Luke’s didn’t send fireworks erupting across the sky nor did it feel as if the earth was going to shatter at your feet. It did, however, feel as if you were exactly where you were meant to be. You were wrapped in his arms, hands tangled in his curls, and nothing had ever felt more right.

You were upset that you’d wasted so much time, waiting for life to just happen. But, as you pulled away and rested your forehead against Luke’s, you decided that nothing else mattered anymore. The future, the one where you and Luke existed and everything else came as it would, was all that mattered.

Luke, with his bright grin and flushed cheeks, grabbed your hand and began tugging you back the way you’d come. With a laugh, you dug your heels into the ground and shook your head. “Nope. Finish hike first. Then, we go to my place and shower.”

“You’re going to make your boyfriend hike two more miles?”

“For every half mile you finish, I’ll give you a kiss.”

“Make it every quarter and I get to touch your butt.”

“Shut up and start hiking, Hemmings.”

With another grin in your direction, Luke returned his sunglasses to the bridge of his nose and kept his hand in yours as he tugged you along down the path. In the future, there would be more hikes and more kisses.

And neither of you could wait.

___________________________________

Author’s Note: ....there’s not as much hiking in this as I wanted but I got started and it, uh, had a mind of its own. Anyway, two fics in like a week? Who am I?

#luke hemmings imagine #5sos imagine #5sos imagines #luke hemmings imagines #5 seconds of summer imagine #luke hemmings x reader #5sos x reader #mine

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heloflor · 3 years

Text

Little update about my Milo Murphy fics, in case you care about it and because it’s been a while :

So after weeks of nothing I finally finished editing part 2 of my “As Time Passes Prologue 2” + made another fic that’s also done in terms of editing. Though, I wanted to re-read them fully to make sure it’s fine before posting but then an illness started going around in our house and I’ve been sick since Tuesday evening (it’s called “gastro” in French. Not sure what’s the English word for it and I don’t want to look it up); and I don’t trust myself with editing with a headache and when I kinda feel like throwing up everytime I stand up to walk somewhere.

On the bright side, I was pretty fine while sitting down so instead of re-reading I focused on two fics I had thought about and had started writing back in August so I might post them soon as well. There’s also another oneshot I thought about this summer but it’ll take a bit of planning before writing so it won’t come out immediately (I might work on it in parallel with editing part 3 of my Prologue 2).

And don’t worry for my health, I’m doing a bit better today and I think I might be fine tomorrow. Though, I won’t post any fics tomorrow for…reasons (I say as if it wasn’t already November 5th where I live).

Last thing, because why not, here’s under the cut a short description of those 5 works and their level of completion as a preview, if you want to know what to expect in the upcoming days :

- “As Time Passes Prologue 2 part 2” : the continuation of the story. Took me a while to get myself to write it because of the heavy topics in it but it’s pretty much done and almost ready for posting.

- “Relapse” : a 10k oneshot based on “A Christmas Peril” that could also be called “Alcohol and bad Decisions”. Basically it’s a “what if Cav and Dak met again around a year after breaking up/divorcing ?” and it will be tagged as “mature” on AO3 with content warning. The fic is pretty much done and just need a read to make sure it’s fine.

- “Dependence” : a 5k oneshot about Cavendish and Dakota addressing Dak’s issues, a day after the end of season 2. I finished the first draft earlier today, it’s longer than expected but I’m actually happy about that because at least it feels developed enough. Though, so far, it also feels like the ending is dragging a bit. But then again it’s just the first draft. Also I might change the title of this one. It might be ready in a few days since it’s a short fic.

- “Company”/“Companionship” : a narration-only oneshot about Doof’s POV during the rogue arc. Not sure where the idea came from but when I started writing it the sentences just kept flowing so I kept on going. So far, I only have the first half (more like 2/3) on paper that was written back in August so I need to write it down in a doc and finish it. Not sure how long it will take since it’s a rather short thing (~2-3k words) but I can be lazy.

- “Rogue Logs”/“Cavendish’s Rogue Logs” : a dialogue-only oneshot about Cav recording himself when he went rogue. Yeah this one hasn’t been started yet and it’ll need some planning, especially since I want to link it to my other rogue arc fics (fun fact about my MML fics : every single fic take place in the same timeline/universe unless stated otherwise or unless there’s something that very obviously doesn’t make sense when compared to the other fics). So, while this one has been in my brain for a few months, it won’t come out very soon. Also I’m not sure how long it’d be because on one hand the amount of logs will be like 75-76 but on the other end some of them will be very short. And yes, in a way, this fic will be kind of like a mirror version of my fic “Voicemails” since we’re on the other end of the receiver.

#Flor talks #Other #my fics #I guess #not gonna tag the show for obvious reasons #as someone who's almost never sick; those last two days have been a pain #hope I'll be better tomorrow #gotta be in best shape when the memes of THAT DAY are coming #illness mention #(in case)

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so-why-let-your-voice-be-tamed · 3 years

Text

With the year coming to an end, here is everything I’ve written in 2020. I had quite a productive year, and wrote some fics I’m very proud of. I’ve also met wonderful new people and I’m going to participate in the big bang next year, as well as hopefully join more fests! Thank you to everyone who has helped me create these 12 fics!

March:

🤴 with no way out and a long way down Larry, 31k, T, written for the @hlroyaltyfest

Prince Harry is ten when he receives his soulmark.

May:

✈️ driving down a one way road (to something better) Zouis, 26k, T, written for the @wallsficfest

“I’m at the airport.” It’s followed by a bitter laugh. “I’m - I’m literally at the airport, hiding away in the toilets to make a phone call. They’re probably going to barge in here in a minute, thinking I’m doing something illegal, but I didn’t know what else to do Lou.” He sounds desperate, wild, nothing that Louis is used to associating with Zayn. “My flight leaves in an hour, and I wasn’t gonna do this, but, I didn’t know what else to do.”

Louis frowns. “What do you mean, love?”

“Can I - Can I please come and stay with you?” It’s barely more than a whisper, and Louis honestly isn’t sure if he’s heard it right, but the lack of an immediate response on his part makes Zayn’s breath come out all shaky and Louis won’t stand for that.

“Yes,” he decides, repeats it, in a softer but no less certain voice, when he knows Zayn is about to protest. “Yes. Of course. I’ll be there, yeah? I’ll come pick you up. When will you get here? What airport?”

---

When Zayn breaks up with his boyfriend, he needs a place to stay. Louis wouldn't be Louis if he didn't immediately open his doors to him. Never mind the fact that he's been in love with him for two years. That's not important, right?

July:

🏥 my love will never leave you Larry, 10k, T, written for the @wordplayfics challenge week 1

In a world where memories are used as currency, Louis will do anything it takes for Harry to get better.

🗝 sadness is a little boy looking out the window Ziam, 6k, T, written for the @wordplayfics challenge week 2

Liam is twelve when he receives the key. It’s given to him on his birthday, in a red velvet box, and something about the weight of the box in his palm gives him pause, makes him hold his breath when he unwraps the bow around it.

The bronze key looks innocuous, but Liam knows better. He’s grown up with the stories, as many people have. Has been told about the keys, and that most people except for an unlucky few got one at birth. Some were immediately gifted to them by their parents, others had been kept away from them until such a time that they were deemed responsible enough to understand what it meant.

Because this kind of key, it doesn’t just open any door.

It reveals what you need most, when you need it most, and it can only be used once.

✨ it’s time to find your wings again Larry, 12k, T, written for the @wordplayfics challenge week 3

The first reports are dismissed, as tall tales or folklore. As mental illness, poor Bathilda, she’d gone loopy. As people simply getting scared in the dark woods and seeing things, making things up. Magic isn’t real. Mythological creatures aren't real.

But then the first one is caught. A faun, that little Meg from around the corner swears has attacked her in the woods, and everyone comes to the marketplace to see the faun be hanged for its crimes. Louis doesn’t want to go, but at the same time, he finds himself unable to stay away. Not when this proves what he’s wanted to believe all along, that magic is real.

Louis is twenty when he starts working at the prison. His fascination for supernatural creatures had turned into something most closely resembling loathing over the years, due to the many stories of their evildoing, and although he still doesn’t believe in hanging them for their crimes, he does believe in keeping the town safe. In making sure that his siblings get to grow up without fear of being kidnapped or hurt. As the oldest son, it feels like his duty to make sure that no creature in the wide area will ever pose a threat to anyone.

🍛 it’s a long shot just to beat these odds Ziam, 14k, T, written for the @wordplayfics challenge week 4

Zayn: how many years in prison would I get for murdering a popstar???

He scrapes the plates clean, resists the urge to kick the trash can, his breathing still feeling shallow and high in his chest. He wants a cigarette. And a cuddle from Louis. But a text is the most he can realistically ask for now, and luckily Louis doesn’t leave him hanging.

Louis: ?????

Okay, so it isn’t that helpful, but Zayn knows his anxiety well enough that just distracting his mind is usually enough to keep from having an actual attack. It doesn’t matter that the subject he’s discussing is the one thing his brain is actually panicking about, just trying to formulate words into a text is helping.

Zayn: I served him raw chicken. RAW. And he was kind enough to want to try and eat it too. I could have killed him!!!

That would’ve made headlines for sure. FORMER BOYBANDER GETS POISONED ON FIRST DATE, more on the ten p.m. news.

Louis: well that’s one way of making sure he’s not going to go on any of the other dates. Bit drastic though mate.

August:

💌 if you’re lost just look for me Larry, 9k, T, written for the @wordplayfics challenge week 5

Let your dreams set sail.

Louis blinks at the sticky note, sitting casually in between a flyer advertising an upcoming gig for one of the many bands on campus (the heavy metal graphics implying that the music is not to Louis’ taste) and an ad for a yoga club (Louis is going to have to give that one a miss too). It’s small, barely noticeable unless you’re paying attention, just tucked away as though it’s been left there for Louis to find.

He snorts. “Let your dreams set sail. What a fucking joke.”

Louis' first year of college is everything he had hoped for it to be.

It’s why it’s so hard to swallow that his second year is everything but.

A fic where motivational quotes, no matter how cheesy, might just make everything better after all.

💐 the birth of love like a force of nature Ziam, 22k, T, written for the @ziamfantasyfest

After moving into a new house, Liam decides to introduce himself to the neighbours. The next thing he knows, he’s tied to a chair and threatened by a small army of fairies.

October:

👻 these days I watch you from afar Larry, 666 words, T, written for the @1dtrickortreatfest

“Are you talking to me?”

The boy blinks, blue eyes thoughtful as he cocks his head. “Yeah?”

“You can see me?”

🎃 love me like we don’t have tomorrow Ziam, 666 words, T, written for the @1dtrickortreatfest

"Are you going to see him again?" Louis asks. He’s sitting on a ruined wall, inspecting his long, dark nails. Talons, Zayn thinks. He nods.

“How many years in a row is this?”

Zayn glances at his best mate, doing up the buttons on his coat. “Dunno,” he says, even though he can recall, with perfect clarity, all the times he’s met up with Liam. Every Halloween that he’s spent with him.

"And he still doesn't know?"

☠️ be the end of me Zouis, 666 words, T, written for the @1dtrickortreatfest

"Who are you?" Louis asks, and Zayn can tell that he already knows. He's tense, poised for a flight from the inevitable.

Zayn still answers. "Death."

December:

🎄 room for your love underneath this tree Larry, 11k, T, written for the @1dchristmasfest

“IwannameetHarryStyles,” Daisy mumbles, and Louis blinks.

“What?”

“She says she wants to meet Harry Styles.” Phoebe pipes up, and Louis blinks again, absently switches the camera to himself because he knows that his followers will want to catch his baffled expression.

“You-” he starts, and then stops himself, because he did tell her she could ask for anything she wanted, and how can he go back on his word and tell her that he doesn’t actually have the power to make that happen?

Because Harry Styles is -- he’s next level kind of famous. Louis has two million subscribers on his YouTube, but Harry has eighteen times as many followers on his Twitter alone. He’s had three number one hits in the last year, and his last album had charted at the top spot for a record breaking 27 weeks. He’s a singer, actor and philanthropist, and there is no way in hell that Louis can get him to come meet Daisy for Christmas.

So of course he laughs, even if it’s a little bit breathless, and nods at her. “One Harry Styles for Christmas, coming right up.”

#hlcreators #1dsource #hljournal #larry #my fic post #my fics #2020 in writing #fic masterpost

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mercurytrinemoon · 3 years

Text

Me chaotically pondering on not being master of your own fate aka why even bother with anything but spoiler alert: it’s pretty comforting actually

I was watching The Astrology Podcast episode on zodiacal releasing with Chris Brennan and his guest Leisa Schaim and they mentioned how when they first learnt about this technique, they had this internal crisis around free will vs fate and things like that. Because modern western astrology treats everything from more of a psychological viewpoint. And this is actually one of the issues I have with modern astrology: it offers something that it later on dismisses with the free will cop-out. Which, if you think about it, can as well mean that you can shove the entire thing up your ass.

Traditional astrology (and as far as I know, vedic as well) is more straight-forward with telling you how it is: “nah, you’re going to be miserable up until you’re 40 and you’ll get married a year later and your wife is going to be awesome but she’ll die before you and your career is going to take off when you’re 50 so don’t even bother earlier in life” lol. My example is pretty extreme but I actually dig this approach a lot more because I always liked the idea of things being predetermined; things being fated. To be honest that soothes me a bit, knowing that whatever is supposed to happen, is going to happen. Like, imagine you REALLY want a certain job, sure, you can work hard to heighten your chances of getting it, but doesn’t it calm your nerves knowing that if it’s meant to be, then you’ll get it anyway??? You don’t have to stress about it.

And it makes sense considering I like to look for certain signs along the way. Or thinking that everything you do in life has purpose and there’s a reason in timing? I’m sure everyone has at least one thing in their life where they go “damn, I wish I did this earlier or did this instead” or something like that. Well, maybe it was supposed to be like that? Maybe I was supposed to try out 10 different creative fields in my teens and 20s to finally came back and stick to music? Even if it means I’m never going to be nowhere near as great at guitar as John Mayer is? Maybe I was supposed to start studying astrology later than I wish I did? Maybe I was supposed to miss out on that one opportunity because if I took it then, I would blew it to pieces? Because I wasn’t mentally ready for it? And I have to wait a bit to take it the next time? Maybe Lady Gaga was supposed to be rejected by all those recording companies because those would ruin her carreer? Isn’t that reassuring?

I really liked one example from the podcast where they talked about a guy who had an idea to pursue illustration. He quickly gave up because he thought nothing is going to come out of it. Years later he was hired at an animation company and now he has a successfull carrer. So eventually it did work out and this is what was suppose to happen. And you could clearly see it with the zodiacal releasing technique (and probably some others cause they usually overlap)... But even without the astrology aspect, it’s a great story.

It kind of also ties into my issue with manifestation. Fans of law of attraction are going to hate me for this so a lil warning. But I always thought that if someone wants to manifest something, it shows interest with that topic in the natal chart, which also means that there’s a possibility of achieving it. So, you didn’t manifest anything, you just were already predisposed to having it.

Not to discredit law of attraction completely, I did notice it working on a small level. But, let’s be honest, if it was that easy to manifest, the world would be a total mess. And people who are like “I manifested 10k dollars in a few days” who act as if they just found it on the street... Gimme a break.

Obviously not every small thing is set in stone. There are accidents that can be prevented. You’re not doomed or anything. Although, interesting fact, there was this famous Polish astrologer, Leszek Szuman, who calculated people’s dates of death, wrote it down, sealed in envelopes so that others would see if he was right AFTER they die. Anyway, the thing is, he was correct with all of them. But, if I remember correctly, he gave a several potential dates. So yeah, I’m gonna end on this pessimistic note lol.

K bye

#oh i can already see law of attraction people coming @ me lol #idk it can be funny sometimes #like that story of a guy who wanted to manifest having a red car #and he ended up as a driver for someone else #and the car was indeed red #so like be careful what you wish for #but still it was a small thing to manifest #yeah the car was some luxurious expensive one #but it's just a car #you know what i mean?#ok whatever #word vomit #random #astrology

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lukehughes43 · 4 years

Text

heartbreak girl - trevor zegras

chapter one

word count: 5,092 whoa vivi can write something under 10k?

your head was nodding along to the beat of the drums jack was busy playing. however, your eyes were focused on your best friend, who was currently singing the lyrics of one of the songs he wrote for the band. “i can be a liar, i can be a cheat. i can be neurotic, i can be a freak,” you sang along with trevor under your breath. kicking your feet as you sat on the couch locking your eyes with trevor’s blue ones for a split second before he was focused on playing the notes song on his guitar.

as soon as the song came to a close you were jumping up and cheering for your four friends. “whoo!” you screamed before running over and giving your best friend a giant hug, “you guys killed that! when you go to la you’re gonna fucking kill it. get a fucking record deal!” with that you pulled away from trevor and walked over to hug both patty and alex. the black haired bass guitarist was quick to wrap you up in his own arms while all of you started to laugh a little bit. “but seriously trev, when, and how did you write that?” you questioned before walking back to give jack a quick hug.

“uh i wrote it a couple days ago,” the lead singer answered while shrugging his shoulders. setting his guitar back in its stand in the zegras garage. “as for how i wrote it? i’m not, uh, i’m not really sure,” he trailed off. eyes looking at every single boy except for at you. only you didn’t notice seeing as jack had wrapped his arms around your waist to pull you to look at the wall instead of trevor. not wanting you to see the look of pain that was etched across your best friend’s face.

“there’s a lot of things you don’t even know about z, y/n. aren’t you supposed to be his best friend?” patty taunted as you turned around to walk back to your seat on the couch. “or has someone else taken that throne since you started dating caden and don’t have time for z, or us.”

as soon as you sat down you were glaring over at the eighteen year old with brown hair. “take it back patrick,” you hissed, ready to pop out of your seat. only before you could trevor was sitting down next to you. throwing an arm over your chest to keep you in your place. “get off of me z!” you screamed trying to get out of his hold. “at least i can get a boyfriend, you can’t even get a girlfriend patty,” you snapped while finally pushing trevor’s arms off of your body. and before he could pull you back down to the couch you were marching over to be face to face with the tallest of the four boys.

“i wouldn’t call caden much of a boyfriend,” he responded, arms crossing over his chest. “more of dick with legs.” with that you were winding up, only alex and jack hooked their arms with yours and threw you back on the couch.

“patty stop talking,” jack huffed while glancing back over to the brunette. “y/n looks like she’s ready to kill you.”

“i am going to fucking kill him!” you yelled while trying to break away from alex, jack, and trevor. “let me go so i can fucking kill him!” only instead the boys hold tightened on you. trevor’s arms making sure to hold tight around your waist. “you have no right to say that about caden!” your body was thrashing against the three boys, only it wasn’t getting you anywhere. finally sighing you slumped back against trevor’s body. jack and alex letting go of your arms.

alex let out a sigh as he ran a hand through his hair, “y/n/n come on, we all know you and caden aren’t even considered together right now.” you looked between all four of the boys watching as they all nodded their heads. your eyes rolled and your arms crossed over your chest. “you broke up tuesday because after our gig you ditched him to hang out with trevor and us. he got mad at you and you broke up. again.”

you let out another huff while slipping into the open spot on the couch next to the brunette singer. “yeah, well i must have forgotten to mention that we got back together last night,” you spat, starting to fiddle with your fingers. legs throwing themselves over trevor’s lap. “and before any of you make a big dramatic sigh, over nothing, caden’s a good guy.”

right on que all four members of the band had let out a sigh. trevor’s head dropped down so he was looking at his lap, patty let out a scoff as he shook his head, and jack and alex just shared an uneasy look. “what’s the longest you guys have actually dated for?” jack quizzed before sitting back down at his drum kit. “because my bet is five months, and that’s when the two of you first started dating three years ago.”

“my bet’s two weeks,” alex added.

patty hummed while shaking his head to disagree with all of them. snapping his fingers as he smiled right at you, “three fucking days.” before you could even have a chance to snap back at any of the boys, trevor’s eyes were looking up from his lap. he glanced over at you through his lashes while squeezing your ankle. then over to the boys.

“you’re all wrong,” he mumbled, “it was seven months.” instantly patrick was shaking his head to argue with trevor. thinking that there was no way you and caden had made it that long. you weren’t paying any mind to the fact all four boys were now bickering, deciding to start scrolling through instagram while trying to find something more entertaining than them.

only when you didn’t pay attention, and pushed the conversation out of mind, jack was sharing a knowing look with trevor. realizing the hurt he had in his voice, and the way he could barely even look over at you after he had said it. your relationship hadn’t come between yours and trevor’s friendship. no matter how many times caden had tried to make it, you always chose trevor. then after a couple weeks, days, or sometimes even hours one of you would always end up crawling back to the other. it was a never ending cycle of hurt you put yourself through, but it was for love, then you were all for it. plus you got to keep your best friend, along with your other three annoying friends, and still be the band’s biggest supporter, basically their manager. no matter how much it pissed caden off.

trevor started patting your calves, causing your eyes to snap over at him. “what’s up trev?” you question, not able to help the smile that was forming on your face. the look of pure innocence, which he was not, was too sweet not to smile at. his shoulders just shrugged and you couldn’t help but giggle a little bit. “do you wanna head back to my house? seeing as you’re all done playing.”

his head nodded right away, “i mean if you’re insisting.” your eyes rolled as you started to stand from the couch. “plus i heard mama m/n is making my favorite for dinner. boys feel free to stick around, but don’t expect julie to feed you, again.”

“and before you ask, no you can’t come to have dinner at my house,” you sassed, with a smile on your face. “my mom already made it very clearly that none of you can come over for dinner without a reservation.”

“hey it was one time!” alex screeched. referring to the time you and all four members of beyond michigan showed up at your house expecting dinner. julie having kicked all of you out not wanting to feed you dinner for the seventh time in a row. “plus doesn’t m/n love us?”

right away trevor was shaking his head, “she only loves me. she tolerates you three idiots. then you’re her daughter y/n, so i think she loves you.” your e/c rolled as you grabbed trevors wrist and started leading him out the open garage door. “well i guess i’m being forced to leave you, bye guys. same time tomorrow?”

“bye z, bye y/n/n. same time tomorrow,” patty confirmed as he dropped down on to the couch. pulling his phone out as he did so.

“and you better have new songs finished trevor!” jack reminded the boy as the both of you opened your car doors. “we need the lyrics and to figure out the melodies, notes, chords. we gotta be on our a game for the demo track.”

“you guys don’t even know what an a game is,” you teased, starting your engine. “you’re a mess.”

patty scoffed from the couch, head tipping back to look at you and trevor. “oh and you’re not y/n? in fact i think you’re a bigger mess than our band is.”

with that you flipped both your middle fingers up towards the boys still lingering in the garage, “fuck you patrick.” as you slammed your car door closed he blew you a kiss before returning to his phone. jack and alex both waving goodbye to you and trevor. as you started to back out of the driveway you turned towards your best friend. “having trouble writing z?” you were genuinely concerned. not once in his life had trevor had a problem writing songs. even when the two of you were two years old and barely knew what singing was, trevor still found a way to scribble his songs into a go diego go notebook.

trevor’s shoulders just shrugged before mumbling, “i just dunno what i want to say.” your mouth fell open as you scoffed over at him. “what’s the look for y/n/n? i just don’t know what i want to say!”

shaking your head at the boy you started the short two miles drive down the road to your family’s house. “trevor, you’ve always known what to say,” you answered, stealing a glance over at him. his blue eyes focused on the passing scenery that consisted of different houses. something he’d seen over millions of times along the drive to your house. “you don’t really expect me to believe that you don’t know what you want to say, do you?” you pressed while slowing to a stop at one of the stop signs.

“i do actually,” he sighed while looking over towards you. his brown hair falling flat against his forehead as he did so. “none of the boys will believe me, but you’re my best friend y/n.” his voice was pleading as he spoke. blue eyes searching your e/c ones before you look back to the road. “so yeah, i expect you to believe me.”

sighing you nodded your head, “i do believe you trev. i just, wow. you really don’t know what to write about?” he mumbled back to you, something you couldn’t quite make out. now that was unlike trevor. the eighteen year old was always confident, and hardly ever mumbled. “i think i might know how to get you back into writing tz.”

a smile lit up on trevor’s face as you pulled into your driveway. “tell me!” he screeched while leaning over the middle consul as he threw his seat belt off. seeing as you car was now safely parked in your garage. “y/n/n, you need to tell me. right now!” he hollered, arms crossing over his chest while he started to pout over at you. the smile that was starting to pull on the corners of your lips was a large one, and it only ever happened because of trevor.

“so you don’t know what to write or sing, huh?” you asked once more. just trying to make sure that you had it all figured out.

“yeah y/n/n! i’ve only said it like seven times,” he grumbled while pushing open your car door.

you followed suit, leaning against the side of your car while smiling over to him. “then sing what you’re feeling trevor. write what you’re feeling z,” you explained while starting towards the door that was connected to your mudroom by the kitchen. “and before you try and tell me that’s what girls do, every great songwriter does it trevor, and you’re a great songwriter.”

trevor’s head nodded as he walked into the mudroom, kicking off the pair of converse he had on. “so you’re telling me that i should just sing what i feel, y/n/n?” he repeated back to you, watching as you leaned over to undo the straps of your chacos. ready to catch you if you were about to fall over. “because i don’t know if i can do that. putting my feelings on to paper for everyone to hear in the world,” he added on once the two of you were starting into the kitchen.

“but you can write and sing about jack, alex, and patty’s feelings?” you retorted with a knowing smile. trevor just shook his head, eyes rolling as the two of you walked further into the house. “what no answer because you know i’m right?”

sighing the lead singer ran a hand through his hair, “with them it’s only a certain level of how personal it is, you know?” once you nodded your head to show you understood he continued to speak. “but when if me singing about my feelings i dunno, that makes me nervous.”

you started to laugh a little bit, smiling wide as you looked over at him. “that’s why you look at me when you’re singing your feelings, trev. i make you less nervous, right?” you smiled while leaning up on the balls of your feet. arms wrapping around trevor’s body since you had the feeling that what he really needed was a hug from his best friend.

“right.”

there was something about the way he said it that you couldn’t let go of, but when he hugged you back you let it slip from your mind. “so at the next gig, when you’re singing about your feelings for the first, you look right at me trevor zegras. i’ll help you get through it, okay bud?” you asked, head dropping to rest against his chest. gently rocking the two of you as you stood there in your kitchen.

“how’s caden gonna feel about me starting at you while i sing about god knows what?” trevor questioned, head tilting down to look at you. “i mean don’t get me wrong i’ll do it y/n/n. i hate him, he hates me, so it’ll be easy. i won’t feel bad about it, but i don’t wanna cause any problems for you with him,” he rambled on, his hands playing with the fabric of the t-shirt you were wearing.

glancing up at trevor your mouth opened to speak only you were beat to punch, “hi kids. how was band practice?” slightly pulling away from trevor’s body you turned to seeing both of your parents standing in the doorway from the mudroom. grocery bags in hand, smiles on their faces.

“i mean i just sit there, but i thought it was good,” you answered, fully untangling yourself from trevor’s arms. walking over and right away starting to help grab some of the bags. trevor was hot on your tail, passing by both of your parents with a smile as he grabbed the rest of the bags that were on the floor that you couldn’t.

“so then why don’t we hear from the main man of that band,” you dad suggested. your entire family's eyes were on trevor, his cheeks burning pink as he started to put packages of fruit in the fridge.

he was biting his lip when you stole a look at him from the corner of your eye. his head bobbed to what you assumed was the beat of a new song he was currently thinking of before he started to string together a response for you parents. “of course you thought it was good y/n/n, you always think it’s good,” he countered towards you. making sure that a smile was strung on his face while he teased you. “but in reality it was pretty good. would’ve been great if i would finish some more songs,” trevor revealed to your parents. his focus on putting the eggs into their spot in your fridge.

your mother smiled over at trevor while she set her bags down on the island. the ones that held all of the ingredients for dinner. “well that’s great to hear,” she replied, trevor turning to face her once she started to speak to him again. “why don’t you guys run up to y/n’s room, and we’ll come get you when dinner’s ready.”

“are you sure?” trevor pondered, quickly looking over to you, and if you had it your way you’d be making a run for it up to your room. only trevor always wanted to help out with your when it came to your family. said that he owed it to your parents seeing as they were basically his second mom and dad. “we can help finish putting away groceries m/n. it’s not a big deal,” he informed as he folded up the reusable bag and put it back in the pantry your mom kept them in.

she laughed while walking over to give the boy a side hug, “oh trev it’s perfectly okay. d/n can finish putting all of these away as i get dinner started.”

“yeah i’ve got this,” your dad boasted, knocking his hip against yours while he placed his own empty bag back in the pantry. “go relax a little bit or something.”

right away you were nodding your head, “you don’t have to tell me twice, come on z. you can talk to my parents at dinner.” before the singer could even argue with you, your hand was latched around his wrist pulling him through the dining and living rooms and up the stairs. as soon as you were in your room you let go of his wrist to fall back against your bed. “you can pick a record today trev,” you said while pulling your own phone out. shooting a quick text back to caden saying that you’d talk to him later. not going into much detail so he didn’t ask any questions of you.

when you locked your phone you were staring over at trevor who was busy sifting through the record collect you had acquired over the years. bottom lip sucked between his teeth as he looked over all of his options. probably half of which he had gotten for you for gifts over the years. “how does mamma mia sound to you y/n/n?” he quizzed while pulling out the record. one you had probably listened to more than any of the other ones, mainly because it was the first vinyl trevor had ever given you.

“it sounds perfect to me z,” you beamed while sliding over in your bed. moving over enough so trevor had room to sit down next to you. as soon as ‘honey, honey’ had started to play over your record players trevor was seating himself next to you. quick to lay himself out and take over half of your bed up. “so when is the next gig tz? none of you guys have even told me, and i’m supposed to be your guy’s quote unquote manager.”

trevor’s shoulders shrugged as he pulled out his phone, going straight to the group message that you were a part of. typing out a quick message before it popped up on your phone.

beyond michigan + y/n

trevy z:) : guys when’s our next gig. manager won’t get off my ass about it:/

y/n/n<3 : fuck off z, i just needa know so i can plan my outfit.

y/n/n<3 : ew. let’s pretend i didn’t just say that.

jack hughes: come on manager, you’re the one who’s supposed to know these things

pAtTy: yeah come on y/n, aren’t you the one who booked this for us? some manager you are

y/n/n<3 : thanks for defending me trez, it’s okay. just sit there jamming out to your mamma mia

turcs: z, you’re listening to mamma mia?

trevy z:) : no. y/n’s lying.

right away trevor was looking over at you, “y/n, please shut up. they don’t need to know about mamma mia.” shrugging your shoulders you looked back down at your phone. “oh come on!”

beyond michigan + y/n

y/n/n<3 : we’re currently on money, money, money;) sorry trev

trevy z:) : *trevor has left the chat*

jack hughes: the next gig’s next saturday

pAtTy: you’ve got a whole ten days to plan your outfit princess:)

y/n/n<3 : *y/n has left the chat*

locking your phone you looked over at trevor who was pouting back at you. “oh come on trev, you can’t be mad at me. you love me trevor zegras, and there’s no denying it either,” you sang while your smile started to grow. “you love me trevor zegras,” you repeated, leaning over to start poking at his toned abdomen which was hidden by the fabric of his shirt.

after a dramatic sigh trevor looking over at you smiling, “of course i love you y/n.” you let out a victory ‘hmp’ before his blue eyes rolled at you. “do you want anything from downstairs?” he suddenly asked while changing the topic. sitting up in your bed before he pushed himself up off your bed as he stared down at you. “well i’m waiting y/n/n, do you want anything or not?”

you couldn’t help but laugh as you rolled over on your side to give him a questioning look, “shouldn’t i be the one asking you that z? this is my house after all.”

“well i figured since i was gonna go down there, and your parents love me,” trevor answered, slowly walking over towards the door. “so do you want anything, girlfriend, or no?” he sassed as his arms crossed over his chest. rolling your eyes at the drama queen you let out a hum.

“just a water please,” you responded, while smiling over at him. “please and thank you trev.”

with that he nodded his head before heading out of your room. as soon as trev left your room you pulled out your phone once more to send a text to caden.

y/n: trev’s over for dinner, and before you freak out at me, i was planning on having you come over once i brought him home c

caden<3 : i guess that’s okay. am i sleeping over, or can i not because i’m not trevor. like seriously, your parents are letting you and trevor sleep together in the same room in new york, but i can’t spend the night?

y/n: baby please. trev and i have been best friends since we were born. you’re my boyfriend c. it’s a little bit of a difference. plus new york? can we not fight about this. again.

caden<3 : yeah fine. whatever, text me when you’re bringing him home so i know when to leave

downstairs trevor padded right into the living room, rounding the corner he came face to face to see that both of your parents were still in the kitchen. only now your mom was currently working on making dinner, and your dad was sitting at the island drinking a beer to keep him company. “hey m/n, hey d/n!” he called while sliding into the kitchen.

“hi trevor!” your dad smiled, tipping his beer bottle over towards the boy.

your mother turning around from tossing the salad, “hey hon how are you? we barely got a chance to talk and catch up.”

the blue eyed boy shrugged his shoulders while smiling, “well if you wouldn’t have kicked us off grocery duty we could’ve talked more.” your mother let out a small laugh before rolling her eyes at the boy. “but i’m great! i’m just grabbing y/n/n a glass of water, and highjacking a bottle of arnold palmer for myself, of course.”

trevor didn’t notice the way that either of your parents looked at each, too focused on digging through the fridge to grab the bottle of half and half. the look that the both of them shared was a sincere on, both of them knowing something you didn’t. “you’re such a good boy trev,” your mom complimented as she went back to tossing the salad.

“how’s the band?” your dad then inquired, taking another sip of his beer.

your best friend couldn’t fight the smile on his face while he turned his attention to the cabinet that contained the glasses. “amazing actually,” he started to explain while grabbing the glass. “there’s been some record dealtalk in the past few weeks,” he then expressed. looking over his shoulder while he filled your cup. gaging your parents reactions, loving the way they both had proud smiles. “it’s really looking good for us right now.”

“really? that’s great!” your mother gasped while walking over to hug him. “well let’s hope that the deal goes through then,” she smiled while hugging just a little bit tighter.

shaking his head trevor bit his lip a little bit. this was his childhood dream he was talking about. one that both your parents knew about. “that makes both of us,” he mumbled to himself. “i know that y/n/n is excited, i think that all of us are,” trevor explained while beaming towards your parents. “it seemed far fetched at first, but not anymore.”

both of your parents were nodding their head to agree with the boy. “trevor we’ve been listening to you sing since you and y/n were two,” your father reminded, “we never thought it was far fetched.”

“your guy’s band is amazing.”

with blushing cheeks trevor put down the glass of water while he tried not to smile. “well thank you m/n, d/n. i would say we could sit and take about the record deal and the new york trip, but i’ve gotta bring this to y/n,” he smiled while pointing down at the glass of water before picking it up. “but thank you guys, really.”

“anytime trev,” your mother replied before the band leader picked up the glass, his bottle of arnold palmer in his hand before walking up to your room with a smile on his face.

the smile on his face only proceeded to grow as he walked back into your room, “one water, as asked for.” your locked your phone before turning to look over at your wide open door. “here you go y/n/n,” he smiled while handing it over to you.

“thank you trevy,” you sang before taking a drink of it. “was dinner almost done when you were down there?” you then asked, part of you wanting to hurry up and eat so you could spend time with your boyfriend. just so there would be no more problems caused at the fact you had spent practically all of today with trevor, and hardly any time with him.

he shrugged his shoulders while dropping back down into his trademarked spot on your bed. “your mom was tossing the salad if that means anything.” you nodded your head while setting your glass on your nightstand. “why are you that starving y/n/n? or do you have ulterior motives?” he questioned, leaning over towards you. face inches away from your own as he stared you down.

biting your lip you shrugged your shoulders, “me with ulterior motives trevy? never.” he let out a hum before you smiled over at him, gently pushing his body away from yours, “i’m just that hungry.” a frown crossed trevor’s face as he watched your phone light up, of course it had to be a text from caden right now.

“you’re ditching me,” he mumbled, his whole body shifting away from you. “of course you’re ditching me y/n/n. caden’s just so much better than me, isn’t he?”

“trevor,” you rushed, leaning over to grab his arm. “trev please,” you begged, hand resting on his bicep. gently squeezing knowing that he would always give into you if you did that. “trevy-”

he shook his head as he scoffed at you, “no y/n. you don’t get to ‘trevy’ me.” your mouth fell open as you stared over at him in shock. “you’re ditching me for caden again y/n! you always do this. ditch me and beyond michigan. you know what, i can’t right now y/n. i need to cool off a bit, so i think i��m gonna head home,” he laughed while pushing up from your bed. “needa run it off. i’ll expect your apology text sometime tomorrow morning since i’m sure caden’s gonna be here all tonight.”

closing your eyes you let out a huff, as ‘winter takes it all’ played through your room. “trev please,” you pleaded while getting up from your bed to follow him to your door. “what about dinner? please just stay for dinner trevor. please,” you whispered, while you could feel the tears start to form in your eyes. you and trevor hadn’t fought like this in forever. “please, please stay for dinner, trevor.” once again you grabbed his bicep, pleading up at him.

trevor shook your hold off, “suddenly i’m not hungry anymore. don’t worry i won’t tell your parents the real reason why i’m leaving. expect i’m sure they’ll figure it out once caden shows up.” with that the brunette walked out of your room and down the hall towards the stairs. shaking your head you let the tears fall as meryl streep’s voice drowned out the pain you were feeling. letting out a frustrated sigh you grabbed your phone to read the text caden had sent you.

caden<3 : hi z, after you leave? y/n/n is all mine, like it should be:)

tears fell down your face as you typed out your response to him.

y/n: you can come over whenever

#heartbreak girl - trevor zegras #trevor zegras x reader #trevor zegras #jack hughes #alex turcotte #patrick moynihan #band au #new jersey devils #anahiem ducks #la kings #boston university #wisco hockey #us ntdp #usa hockey #my writing #my works

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