#and after two weeks without an episode for no reason like lord give me strength

[maddiebuckettebuckley]

I genuinely don’t think I’m like emotionally in the right headspace to deal with an episode with no eddie, no chimney, AND no Maddie like wtf is this season 1

#eddie and/or chimney MUST be in the episode this is not a request……. #and after two weeks without an episode for no reason like lord give me strength #911 fox #911 spoilers

[giaourtopita]

Hiii! I was wondering if I could request an MC who is getting used to being a demon? Like they keep breaking doors, and ripping clothes bc of their wings

the brothers with a demon mc

thank you for requesting! i just did the brothers but send me an ask if you'd like the undatables too! i slightly referenced this post, you can check that out too but you don't have to because it still makes sense.

warnings; slight angst, mc calls lucifer a bitch in satan's part, fluff(ish), mild self-esteem issues in asmo's part, gn mc.

*mc died unexpectedly, they were young and their death couldn't be explained, which was what hurt their boyfriend and friends the most. he was in pain and in desperation for a miracle but he knew it wouldn't happen. his love was dead and he had to accept that.*

*he saw them a few weeks after their death, to say he was happy would be an understatement. he was beyond grateful he got to be with them after all. when mc came closer to him, he noticed small horns sprouting from their forehead. it didn't make sense to him but his darling was there so it didn't really matter.*

*he didn't think that a human such as mc could become a demon but apparently there have been recorded some cases where a human that had a pact with one of the most powerful demons can in fact become a lesser demon themselves and live in devildom instead of hell.*

*the transition from human to demon was hard for mc, it was painful as they were developing new limbs and muscles as well as horns. their partner has to help them with the pain, control their new abilities and also teach them how to change forms but of course he was happy to help if that meant that his sweetheart could be with him.*

lucifer

- mc was with lucifer the whole day during r.a.d., it had only been a few days since the two reunited and both were ecstatic about it. lucifer took care of mc's pain in the morning by applying some sort of healing cream on the base of their wings as well as on the skin surrounding their small horns.

- the pain was coming back and it was much more sharp than the one in the morning. it was getting too intense for mc to handle so they subconsciously turned into their demon form and stretched their wings in order to get some relief.

- they turned into their demon form, startling everyone including lucifer.

- "darling, what happened?", he asked them while looking around at the other demons and signaling them to not stare.

- mc told him about the pain and he took them home after telling lord diavolo what had happened.

- "lord diavolo will set up online classes for you so you can be more comfortable while transitioning."

- lucifer gave them a massage while using the healing cream and gave them a gentle kiss between their horns.

- "i'll teach you how to fly once you're not in pain okay?"

mammon

- he and mc were hanging out in mammon's room, mc was very playful despite the fact that they were in pain the whole time.

- mc took mammon's jacket and his glasses and started impersonating him. mammon thought they were very accurate with their impersonation and was trying not to laugh, which he failed.

- "mc you look really cute in my jacket, you know that?", mc started blushing so hard that their wings popped out, tearing apart the jacket.

- "i'm sorry, i didn't mean it. i promise i'll get you a new jacket."

- "hey mc, it's okay. i know ya didn't mean it. how are you feeling?", he gently touched the base of their wings making them squirm in pain.

- "i'll go find some pain relief spell okay? just wait here, lay down if it gets really bad.", mammon felt bad leaving them alone right now but he went to satan's room to ask for a spell to help his former human.

- he came back a few moments later with the spell, tended to their needs and gave them a soft kiss on the forehead.

leviathan

- mc and levi holed themselves up in levi's room watching anime.

- levi was so prepared for their transition that he had ordered a pain relief potion for them so they could be more comfortable watching anime with him.

- mc remembered how levi used to wrap his tail around them whenever they cuddled and they wanted to try that too since they also have a tail now.

- levi agreed and showed them how he does it. mc turned out to be a very fast learner and managed to get it right the first time. they reluctantly wrapped their tail around levi's right side while laying on his left.

- levi started the anime they had recently started watching, it was a new shonen anime and the episode they just started watching was a pretty intense one as it was part of a battle arc.

- mc began feeling stressed on the behalf of the protagonist, levi noticed this because they started squishing him with their tail.

- "mc, i know this is a really stressful episode but could you stop squishing me? i understand that you can't control your tail yet but it really hurts right now."

- mc felt bad and apologized immediately to him. they shifted back to their human form so that they wouldn't hurt levi anymore.

- "hey, once we're done with this episode i'll teach you how to deal with the tail okay?"

satan

- satan was also very prepared for their transition, he had done some research and had healing creams, pain relief spells and potions within his reach at all time.

- mc was very well taken care of as satan always went a bit overboard with both the pain relief and the healing process, he hated seeing mc in pain so much that he even found them a diet to follow so that their tail would grow faster and the pain will be over sooner.

- "lucifer is a bitch", mc said angrily while getting in satan's room not being careful enough they transform into their demon form and yank the door causing it to break in half.

- "oh no, i'm sorry", they apologised. "i'll fix it i promise."

- "it's okay don't worry about that now, he is but what happened?"

- mc explained to satan that they wanted to go to the grocery store for some snacks but he wouldn't let them go unless one of the brothers accompanied them.

- "you're a demon now so you're much safer than before, but i think the reason why he's not letting you go unaccompanied outside yet is so that you don't destroy anything."

- "here i'll teach you a trick i still use when i get angry to keep my tail from hitting everything.", satan moved closer to them and stood behind them, he took their tail gently in his hands, moved it downwards and started wrapping the tail around their thigh.

- "it will take a while for you until you're able to wrap the tail without using your hands but this will work for now. you're not in pain, are you?"

- "yeah, i'm fine. thank you", mc smiled at him and then looked down to see that he also transformed into his demon form to show them how he does it.

asmodeus

- "oh sweetie, it's okay i think i can fix it. don't worry!", asmodeus said while looking at the new blouse he just bought for mc.

- mc got upset at themselves because they didn't want to ruin asmo's gift with their stupid wings. it made them feel stupid. how hard is this supposed to be?, they thought to themselves.

- asmo noticed how they felt, after all being around so many people at the same time made him more understanding than the average demon.

- "you know, if you feel bad about your wings don't. they're beautiful and it doesn't matter that you can't control them yet, it's only natural that you can't do that. you weren't born with them so it's okay, if it makes you feel better i can't really control my wings either, i can make them sit in place but i haven't really found a way to use them because they're pretty small and i was born with them. don't worry, you got it!"

- once mc felt reassured, they asked him a question, "maybe i could ask lucifer to help us both with the wing stuff, if anything he must know the most since right now he has two pairs of wings and before the fall he had three."

- "mc, this is not a bad idea. he might get a little annoyed at the beginning but once we figure it out we will basically give him an excuse to be proud of something so he will also gain from this. mc you're a genious, that's why i love you~", he told them before giving them a boop followed by a kiss on the tip of the nose.

beelzebub

- beel thought it would be a good idea to get mc to actually work out with him now that they're a demon like him.

- he brought them with him to his fungol practice so they could have fun together, mc always wanted to try playing fungol but since they were human it was dangerous but now they can play.

- he told them that they would play in case someone couldn't come to practice or had an injury.

- before practice beel thought them a few tricks so they could keep up in case that got called into the field.

- and they did, one of beel's teammates got sick and couldn't attend practice. it was finally mc's time to shine.

- they shifted into their demon form like the rest of the players and they were able to use all of the tricks they were just taught from beel. they even managed to use some techniques other players used in this practice game and in official matches they had watched prior to becoming a demon.

- all was well until mc kicked the ball using too much force causing the ball to be land outside the field.

- mc immediately apologised and ran to go get the ball and beel followed them.

- "i'm sorry beel, i can't really control my strength yet. i don't think i should be playing fungol yet."

- "it's okay, the rest of my teammates are okay with it, i've talked to them before and your slip ups gives them more time to slack off during practice."

- "oh, okay. thank you!", mc kissed him on the cheek. and the two started walking towards the team again.

belphegor

- "i can't sleep", mc complained again while rolling on the other side in belphie's bed for the tenth time.

- "why can't you sleep mc?"

- "mammon said that demons can last longer awake than humans, so maybe it's that but since i'm with you i want to sleep but i can't. can you use your power to make me sleep?".

- "i don't want to use my power like that on you, maybe you just need to relax and then you'll be able to fall asleep."

- mc thought about it and maybe belphie was right.

- "i think i can last for about two episodes of one of beel's cooking shows before falling asleep, we could watch one of those so you'll relax."

- "that's a great idea, i'll go get the controller.", mc brought the controller which was on beel's bedside table and chose an episode in which they were baking cakes.

- they lied down next to belphie and put their head on his chest.

- "thank you for staying awake with me."

#obey me #obey me shall we date #obey me lucifer #obey me asmo #obey me beel #obey me belphie #obey me leviathan #obey me mammon #obey me satan #obey me fluff #obey me headcanons #obey me fanfic #obey me angst

[i-love-hobbies]

(This isn't an anti-Eda, anti-Lilith or anti-Bump post. Just read this fully, please!)

Murder and violence are not ok!

This whole thing started literally after s1ep2 where Eda murdered a dude on screen.

What am I talking about?

"It's just a cartoon. Don't read too much into it."

I don't have a very strong opinion on this but I'm not a fan of normalizing murder. Also "Heroes that are genocidal maniacs, kill the villain cause he's awful." sounds extremely cringe.

And why are you reading a post that analyses a part of a cartoon right now?

"Death is normal on the Boiling isles, so that makes it ok."

Woah, woah! WHAT?

If everyone used that logic, slavery would still be a thing.

Just cause it's normalized in a culture doesn't mean it's less harmful or that everyone that comes from that culture does it.

It can be used to explain someone's actions, but not excuse them.

The ignorance of context.

1. Eda's murders

First I wanna point out that it was never emotional, it was all calculated. Remember when Tibbles scammed her, she didn't attack him back. None of her kills are revenge. She has always had something to win from them.

She has murdered two people, probably more, Adegast and Tibbles.

If she didn't kill Adegast. I can see this going two ways. He would starve to death, which means she put him out of his misery or he would slowly go back to full power which ties with Tibbles.

Batman kills the Joker.

No they are not as bad as the Joker but they would have continued trying to hurt her untill they got the idea of killing Willow and Gus in their sleep. TIBBLES KNEW THEIR ADDRESS!

Also if they were willing to do this. Who knows what else they have done to other people too. By doing this she has saved more lifes than she has taken (mostly kids).

Plus this willingness to kill is probably the reason Luz can go to school. Eda's enemies know that if they become an actual treat, things won't end well.

Her enemies are criminals. They are not stupid enough to think that she is helpless without magic. Especially now that she isn't running from the law.

- Now on to almost killing Amity in s1ep5 by making Luz cheat. That was messed up but not that badly.

Witches are harder to hurt, there were healers around who would help a Blight. She saw Amity use abomination so she knew mainly her traps were gonna be activated by a non-living thing.

Luz was going to be injured if that didn't happen. Amity was not in control of her strength and I don't think Lilith thought this trough. Though both sisters would have probably intervened when this got out of hand.

She also isn't the one to force Luz into the fight as many people have said. She has never on screen forced her opinion on someone else except in s1ep9 which was to protect her from school and changed in that episode. Luz just couldn't leave cause quitting ment never being able to perform magic.

Now I know that the right thing to do here was for her to try talk things through. I'm just saying it's not as bad as it seems.

2. Eda's scamming

To get my point across I'm gonna compare it to Wordlob.

Hers is the equivalent of you trying to buy gold and getting plastic. His is the equivalent of you're desperate for a cure and he promises to give it to you and then steals all your money and leaves you to die.

You're not going to try to buy gold when your desperate are you?

Scamming can take different forms and hers is the least harmful.

And consider this, what else can she do to put food on the table with her two adopted kids, Hooty and Owlbert. She can't find a legal job, cause that would be helping Belos, she'll die before she does that and she definitely knows ways to disguise herself but that puts her at risk as well.

3. Lilith's redemption arc still works

Yes, she did murder a bird in s1ep18, but the way it talked and acted. It seemed like it was mimicking speach.

Yes, she did almost kill a child, but she has made up for it probably in that week and a half that we didn't see considering this is the Boiling isles and everything is trying to kill you.

Plus, Eda only talked about the curse, considering "You hurt Luz, you cursed me!" She is not the person who would forget about her kid.

Bonus, she did make up for it on screen as well. In s2ep2 she saved King from Eda's experiments. In s2ep3 she saved Luz and King with her ice glyphs, when she could have just left, giving time for Eda to get them out of there. If Eda didn't show up Lilith would be dead.

4. Bump's jokes

- Dissecting Luz

I don't know why everyone talks about Bump and Amity trying to dissect Luz. They weren't certain if this was going to kill her. They weren't certain if she was alive. All they knew was that the lie will be broken if this would kill her.

Yes, they did try to catch her later on, but not to kill her. They wanted to make sense of what's going on and hopefully find her parents so she gets at the very least a talk on why she shouldn't do this.

Willow just overreacted which in return made Luz do the same.

- Bump's detention room

This room is a hypnosis one. Hypnosis is a job in real life. It can be dangerous but that can also be said about therapy if the therapist is bad. Depends on who does it.

"Impressive still alive!" This is a joke.

If a hypnotic session is stopped in the middle, you'd be too relaxed to be able to move. He was fine, he just needed some time.

- Bump's add

Everything that attacked Matt was alive. He probably did something to piss them off. But yeah Bump should have done something.

- Detention track

Guys knowing what he did for Willow in s1ep3, it's obvious that he was in a lot of stress. If he did what he did in that episode regularly. You just touch an orb and byeeeeee. Then this place should have been crowded.

Plus the wall with troublemakers' names had what six names and a portrait of lord calamity. Eda left school before three decades. And that's all we got.

He was probably not gonna keep them there even though he said so. He probably wasn't even planning that.

- Grom was very messed up. I have nothing to say except I wouldn't be surprised if the Emporer's coven forces this to be a thing and refuses to send actual adults, so the kids learn from a young age or whatever.

- Same with the photomemory class.

- "Bosha got away with murder. I can't say I approve, but at least she's trying new things."

This was a joke. Bosha's parents definitely have influence. His hands are tied like usual so he has learned to make jokes out of it. Plus since when are principals responsible for what happens out of school grounds.

5. The bat queen

She is a protector of palismans and I don't think she started to kill until the government was against her (I'm talking about her cave having bones all over it.)

I can't say it's completely justified like I did with Eda. But I don't see a way out of it where palisman wouldn't be extinct.

Now let's see our vilians' behaviour

1. Adegast

He was trying to kill Eda for his business by using a child as a bait.

2. Tibbles

He almost murdered four children so his stand is revenged.

3. Piniate

Is keeping people captive and literally is making them helpless as a punishment for not writing a book.

4. Demon hunters

They were gonna trow kids off a cliff. I'm not sure why actually.

5. The cat ladies

They were kidnapping children for their cafe.

6. The "coven" inspecture

She was stealing all the magic from none other than kids for power.

7. Wordlob

Who knows how many people have died, lost their jobs and so one, cause of his scams. All for money.

8. Warden wrath

He cut Eda's head so she goes out with him. Captures people for nothing.

9. Odalia and Alador

Alador was not stopping Odalia from trying to kill Luz. In their mind this was gonna help in combination with their child abuse, with their daughter helping their business. Everything they have done for now is for their business.

They backed up when Alador saw an opportunity for THEIR BUSINESS.

10. Kikimora

She tried to murder a child, cause of jealousy. Uses her authority to make the system even worse, cause how dare them look in her direction.

11. Belos

Is abusing a child and abused Lilith. Is the reason that palisman are getting extinct. Wild magic= death sentence. Basically created a horrible authority system that has created a lot of suffering and who knows how many it has killed. Probably all for power, though we don't know completely.

#toh #the owl house #toh eda #eda clawthorne #eda the owl lady #edalyn clawthorne #the owl lady #toh lilith #lilith clawthorne #toh bump #toh bat queen #toh vilians #toh kikimora #toh belos #emporer belos #toh odalia #toh alador #toh golden guard #toh hunter

[jasontoddiefor]

What are the councils reaction to medical trauma time travel au anakin. Bcs like holy shit. The prophecy kid is fine one moment and then there's silence for three months, and then turns out the prophecy kid lived through a future where the sith won and he got tortured for two decades. Sure, vader completed the prophecy by killing sidious and then dying, but at what cost? Also the sith lord is the goddamn chancellor.

In the wise words of this new chapter from Mace’s POV: Read on AO3!

Mace’s day had gone from bad to worse with an hour of Kenobi-Skywalker-Tano being in vicinity. The trio truly managed to always bring chaos and destruction with them, no matter how polite Obi-Wan smiled or Skywalker managed to distract from it by pointing towards the bigger evil. They had been granted shore leave – and wasn’t it bitter to think of such when they were not supposed to be warriors? – for a week to sort out whatever terrifying discovery they had made, but Mace was beginning to think that it would take longer than that.

Skywalker’s breakdown this morning had been painful. Mace was especially sensitive to emotions running rampant. It was one of the reasons why standing next to the supernova that was Skywalker could be distracting at times. He still had a headache and didn’t want to know what the aftermath would have looked like if Obi-Wan hadn’t been there, pulling risky mind healing techniques he had not been educated in, to keep Skywalker’s shock from putting half the temple to their knees.

It had certainly left its marks on Obi-Wan. While Skywalker was sleeping soundly in the presence of his Padawan, his clone medic and Vokara, Obi-Wan stood in front of the Council, exhaustion running deep.

“Obi-Wan,” Mace started, foregoing all formalities. “What happened to Skywalker? Your reports stated he wasn’t fit for actually standing on the battlefield and providing any kind of back up that isn’t handing out orders, but not this.”

Obi-Wan was struggling to keep his expression neutral, but in the end, his tiredness won out as he sank back into his chair. “I am aware. We miscalculated and didn’t expect him to have such an adverse reaction to being back.”

“You are not making a lot of sense,” Plo Koon spoke up.

“I know, I apologize. We were not planning to start our briefing by talking about Anakin’s condition. He didn’t want to mention it at all, but his medic, Kix, persuaded him. It was not supposed to overshadow other details and I don’t actually know all the details as it falls under doctor-patient-confidentiality.”

Obi-Wan paused and pinched the bridge of his nose. “I don’t think Anakin wants me to know anything beyond what I need to keep him in check.”

He sounded as if he were quoting, taking words Skywalker had bestowed upon him.

Mace could feel coldness rest upon his bones, fear attempt to take a hold of him. Whatever discovery they had made, it must be gruesome that it could break Skywalker so and still have him consider his own tattered mind an afterthought to be dealt with at a later date. He couldn’t even imagine anything that would require keeping Skywalker in-check. He was reckless at times, brash, and his control could be better, but he was an excellent Jedi. Anakin wanted to protect people and his trust, while hard-earned, was easily given.

So what had caused a Knight of his caliber to be in such pain?

“Obi-Wan, what can you tell us?” Shaak Ti asked, her tone reminiscent more of a Master’s talking to their worried Padawan.

“We know the identity of the Sith Lord.”

Obi-Wan’s words cut through the air like a sharp blade. For a moment Mace thought he had misheard him, that they couldn’t have just stumbled upon such critical information.

“Sure you are?” Yoda asked, the kind of seriousness you gained only after centuries lingering in his voice.

In moments like these, it was easy to see the strength that upheld the grandmaster of the Order, the fierce protectiveness that guarded them even in times like these and grieved deeply for every life lost when they couldn’t afford to stop on the battlefield.

Obi-Wan let out a bitter laugh, the trembling of his shoulders much closer to the body language of a grieving man on the verge of tears.

“Anakin remembers close to twenty years of torture under Darth Sidious and all his claims make sense. It’s all so clear to me now, we were so blind to all his schemes, waking into a trap.”

“Twenty-years?”

“A vision,” Obi-Wan elaborated, then hesitantly. “Or something similar enough to it. He seems to think of it as time travel.”

“Impossible.”

“That’s what I thought as well, but do you know what else could explain it? He just collapsed in the aftermath of a clean-up and when he woke, he didn’t feel like Anakin anymore. Not the way I knew him to, there was just so much suffering.”

What Mace would remember, even years down the line, was the haunted look on Obi-Wan’s face. For a man who had lost his Master to the first Sith in centuries, slew it and then continued on raising a Padawan and leading a war to show such open horror was downright frightening.

“We need to talk to him right now,” Oppo Rancisis voiced what they all thought. If Skywalker had such critical information, they needed it. They had to end this war as quickly as possible and yet-

“No,” Mace said. All eyes turned to him. None of them were displeased by it, most looked thankful. The war had made it so that they needed to hold back as to avoid giving the Senate, or the Chancellor as it were, even more reason to put the Jedi under direct control. They had to compromise their values, raise an entire generation during wartime all while fighting endless battles without being able to protest against it. Here, in their home at least, they could still execute some measure of control. “Skywalker is hurting and we have not yet fallen so far that we unconditionally sacrifice the wellbeing of our own. Obi-Wan, how much has Skywalker revealed to you?”

From the way Obi-Wan sighed in frustration, Mace suspected that it wasn’t much.

“Only a fraction of what he knows I suspect. He told me of a few critical battles and Separatist strongholds. Mostly, his thoughts have been occupied attempting to figure how quickly he can kill Sidious without the Republic descending into chaos as a result.”

For the months Skywalker had been at least partially out of commission, though Mace wondered how he had been planning any battles at all given this morning’s episode, the 501st and 212th, when not demanded elsewhere, had chosen their destinations rather liberally. Mace had suspected that they had an informant, a man on the inside, as more and more of their campaigns had been successful. The possibility of Skywalker having had a vision of such a magnitude was still unbelievable, but it was entering the realm of possible.

“Why would it descend into chaos?” Shaak asked.

“Because Darth Sidious currently holds all the power,” Obi-Wan spat out, control receding completely and the fiery anger he had been known for as an Initiate showing itself. “He’s the Chancellor. Sheev Palpatine is the Sith Lord and if we don’t take him out soon, he will burn the Republic to the ground to build his Empire.”

And the world cracked, revealing shatterpoints of stunning clarity.

#star wars #mace windu #obi wan kenobi #anakin skywalker #medical trauma time travel au #ask #it's not even evening and obi wan already had the worst day #mace too #poor man #anon #fanfic

[hey-hamlet]

BNHA AU Ideas: True Might

Also on AO3! 

TL;DR:  Powers don't make the hero - passion does. Luckily for Izuku and Toshinori, this is something the quirkless have in droves.

AKA: All Might is a quirkless vigilante, One for All isn't a quirk that exists and 1A gets a whole 3-week buffer before villain's start kicking their face in as opposed to the 3 days of canon.

Basically: Quirkless!Vigilante!All Might and Quirkless!Successor!(gen ed) UA Student!Midoriya. It’s a riot.

Yagi is stupid strong, his only form in this AU is basically Muscle Form from canon, but he’s a little less ridiculously cut. Not quite chubby, but huggable. This is mostly because he A, isn’t a celebrity that needs to have a marketable image and B, he really likes carbs.

He’s not exactly a vigilante by choice, in his day and age quirkless kids weren’t permitted to apply to UA, either gen ed or heroics. When Nezu got the job, that all changed, but it was a solid decade too late for Yagi.

He’s admittedly a little bitter about it, but he refuses to do anything but his best. He might be a little snippier with Pros than he really needs to be but oh well.

Katsuki and Izuku are utterly enamoured with this crazy vigilante that just doesn’t lose, refuses to back down from a fight even when he’s outmatched, and somehow coming out victorious anyway, rescuing everyone. They have a tense relationship, but often find time to get together and just ramble about how cool All Might is, share theories and dissect his fights. It’s not uncommon for Katsuki to have been hurling abuse at Izuku during class, only to show up at his house after school with a backpack full of snacks and a notebook full of questions.

Izuku knows most of what Katsuki does is to keep his status in the school. If he showed pity to a dumb quirkless runt he’d be painted with the same brush. This doesn’t make what Katsuki has done right! Only Izuku doesn’t blame him because he’s way too forgiving.

Izuku is the smartest person Katsuki knows and vice versa – they are each other’s measuring stick. Katsuki shows Izuku bravery, Izuku shows Katsuki determination.

Episode 1 goes as it does but you see a real flash of regret when Katsuki tells Izuku to jump off a roof because they are kinda-sorta friends. Izuku looks so betrayed. We meet the slime villain like before, All Might saves Izuku and 100% doesn’t expect the kid to fanboy about him and ask for two autographs – one made out to a “Kacchan”.

“Can someone quirkless be a hero?” “The whole world will be against you. Most places won't even give you a shot – no matter how good you are. You’re better off picking something else.”

Izuku is crushed but he does understand. All Might leaves and Izuku trails off kinda hopelessly. He follows the sounds of explosions without meaning to.

It’s Katsuki! He’s dying! Like usual at this point lmao. Izuku rushes in much like canon, All Might shows up, pulls Katsuki free and slams a dumpster on the slime villains head before making a speedy getaway. The police rip into Izuku but Katsuki actually defends him. “You were doing fuck all while I fucking died – don’t knock the only asshole who tried.” Izuku quietly slips him the autograph before running off the scene. Katsuki cries because Izuku got that for him even after he was such a fucking bastard that day? He can’t bring himself to be a dick to Izuku again, even only for show.

All Might finds Izuku and he's like “Sorry I was an ass I was being a dick because I had low self-esteem – I’m quirkless. If you’ll have me I’ll make you into the best hero the world had ever seen

Izuku, obviously, says yes please!

Also, hypermobile Izuku with joint braces as support gear because just let me project please my arms are killing me ( I wrote this a while ago and yes. My arms are still killing me - yes even now). He gets them after All Might sees him miss a dodge because his ankles rolled beneath him. They support his joints beyond the normal range of strength, letting him do some crazy pivots and handsprings, making it easy to support all his weight on a single-arm with very little strain. They can also lock in place, lessening muscle fatigue if he needs to hold onto something for ages and preventing injury if he’s pushing against something. Produced by David and Melissa Shield and imported through Nighteye Heroics.

Is support gear illegal for civilians to own? Yes! But medical equipment isn’t so if you can just convince people its medical not support you can get away with a lot.

Yagi has no weapons himself, other than the random shit he picks up and swings at people, and has little support gear other than a communicator, panic button, and a whole lot of zip-ties.

Izuku should probably have weapons but I’m struggling to think of anything other than war fans because how cool would that look? Because Shonen they would also have the ability to create powerful downdrafts that would give a boost to a jump or dodge.

Probably doesn’t get them until later and needs to train with them.

In this AU, One for All isn’t a quirk. Rather, it’s a role, passed from quirkless person to quirkless person, the only people who can’t be hard countered by All for One. They tend to be vigilantes, crime lords or hero managers, doing their part to foil as much of All for One’s plans as they can, through whatever means necessary.

It’s a role with a pretty high fatality rate.

No one knows All Might is quirkless other than those close to him, they instead think he has a strength quirk. He’s the most prolific vigilante in Japan and is almost as much of a household name as canon All Might. More divisive though, with most people decrying his vigilante status when he could ‘easily make a respectable hero’. He’s also pretty brutal with his takedowns of some villains, leading a lot of people to call him an unregulated brute. Still more call him a villain which, legally he would be - were he using a quirk.

Nighteye is his contact in the heroics industry, gives him loads of inside info that’s typically not something he should be passing on. He’s still close with David Shield. Nighteye imports any costume parts he needs from David and leaves them at various pickup points for Yagi.

He went to college with David in America after Nana died; America having a quirk blind admission process helped - but he’d have gotten shit talked a lot if people didn’t just assume he had a strength quirk. Dude was and is crazy big.

David was one of the only people that knew he was quirkless

OH FOR FUN; Nighteye was also going to this American college and that’s where he met All Might. The three of them became the world’s strangest group of friends and may have lowkey done some slightly illegal vigilante work around the campus and surrounding town. They had a reputation for getting no sleep ever and being the most mismatched set of people

Secretly Smart Jock, Business Man with a Touch of E-boy, Science Hipster. They all tumbled into class together with varying levels of alive-ness. Nighteye and David were very much not morning people.

UA! It’s a ride. Izuku fails the practical but he’s not shocked – he was prepared for this.

He actually got like 30 hero points? But they refused to admit him on hero points alone due to his ‘deficiencies’. They don’t exactly tell Izuku this but Aizawa was there and he was furious.

Gets into 1C with Shinsou, Shinsou fuckin hates him on sight for reasons best known to him (It’s bc he was so god damned cheerful he just – assumed Izuku had a quirk. I love Shinsou but he’s more than a little judgemental). Izuku is like smiling through the pain because he just wanted to make a friend his age – Katsuki barely counts.

He sits with him at lunch and makes friends-ish with the hero kids who dragged Katsuki along, meets Ochaco again. She’s upset he didn’t get in – especially after he tells her he apparently got 30 points. The whole table gets mad on his behalf and hes embarrassed and happy.

Like day 2 he’s leaving gym and someone is like “Oh LMAO it’s Deku – he was in the year below me at Aldera. Only fuckin quirkless kid in the whole school; can’t believe he got into UA.” He turns to Izuku. “Who’s dick did you suck to get in you - ?” And Shinsou just decks him. He grabs Izuku – who is super confused fyi – and s p r i n t s. They have to stop after a while because hes having a panic attack and Shinsou doesn’t know what the fuck to do and he’s mad and upset and the sunshine boy is sobbing –

Aizawa shows up, having seen the (end of the) altercation and is ready to expel some gen ed kids he can’t legally expel – until he sees the two kids from the entrance exam he was interested in – including the quirkless kid who should have gotten in. Well he’s much more willing to hear them out.

100% requests expulsion on those 2 2E kids because that’s Discrimination and they should know better as second years. Nezu grants it because those 2 were di ck s

No USJ because no All Might – stuff like that will come,,, later : )

Sports Fest! Izuku and Shinsou kick ass, Aizawa is Watching. All Might may have gotten in as a crowd member with Nighteye and a visiting David and Melissa and they are cheering on their sun son. Also, Nighteye is going to go cheer on Mirio so he just got a pass to attend all 3 days of the sports festival. He’s just buying snacks on the second day because he’s never talked to one of the second years in his life.

Shinsou and Izuku make it to the tournament. Izuku has been training pretty seriously with All Might for a while now and hes a very good fighty boy. Makes it to the 3rd round of the tournament where he loses to Iida. Shinsou makes it second where he loses to Katsuki. Izuku is like “Iida might you be Ingenium’s brother or something?” “Yes, I am!” “OH MY GOD I LOVE INGENIUM ISN’T HE THE COOLEST” “YES MY BROTHER IS AMAZING” Shinsou is just watching while faintly amused.

#bnha au #true might au #bnha #All Might #yagi toshinori #shinsou hitoshi #midoriya izuku #aizawa shouta

[skybird13]

Clover and Qrow (or: The Importance of Relationships in Fiction)

I started writing this in response to @fairgame-is-endgame​‘s post here, but I figured I hijack enough of his posts and this got rather lengthy (🤷‍♂️ it’s me, so go figure). Please do go see the post so you have context. It’s a super short but very meaningful observation that I’ve been wanting to address anyway, so here it goes.

What gets me about this particular complaint is the fact that apparently, in the minds of some people, relationship building isn’t multifunctional in storytelling. People constantly accuse shippers of caring about nothing but the romance (and I admit, there are some shippers who are totally in it for the enjoyment of the romance, and there is nothing wrong with that, just let people have their fun for god’s sake). But a good percentage of us are running around performing doctorate level psychoanalyses and writing what could easily turn into Ph.D. theses (if some of us were so inclined) on not only the interactions between these two characters, but the ramifications on the individual development for each of them, the implications behind their connection, and how all of that can work together to build a stronger story overall.

Yes. Qrow’s screentime in volume 7 has been all about his connection with Clover (outside of that beautiful scene he had with Ruby in chapter… 4, was it? I don’t remember but y’all know which scene I’m talking about where he actually reassumes the role of the adult in their relationship, so much love for him). You know what lies inside that connection?

His healing, for one. Volumes 3-6 took Qrow through one hell of a character arc. He went from having a purpose to losing it, to falling into a serious depression and a bad, bad place with his alcohol abuse, and finally to a place where he started to drag himself out of that hole. CRWBY could have taken him literally anywhere in volume 7. Hell, they could have left his development right there for the entire volume and had him present solely to support Ruby and the others. But what did they do instead? They carried on his arc by giving him one of the many things he needs to heal: a healthy and functional connection with another human being. He hasn’t just been some background shadow there to back up Ruby (which would have been poor writing); he’s had his own development, brief but very carefully crafted to showcase how the end of volume 6 changed him and what he’s trying to do to cope with his mental illness and addiction. He’s openly acknowledging his problems and trying to deal with them. He is working with another person without complaint or fear that we have seen, and we all know how huge that is for him!

Story possibilities run rampant because of his relationship with Clover. Qrow has always been one of the most interesting and dangerous characters in RWBY, and that was as a depressed alcoholic. Can you imagine his potential as someone who is actively working towards being healthy? I’ve brought up the possibilities of what we might see if Clover can somehow help him gain control of his Semblance, and I don’t think that can be overstated. I find it very hard to believe that two characters who, especially when together, can manipulate probability won’t be instrumental in whatever RWBY and JNOR have to do to take down Salem.

And that’s not even getting into the potential impact that Qrow might have on Clover’s development. Some of y’all complaining because we don’t have much on him yet, but good lord, he was just introduced! And his introduction came in a volume bursting at the seams with plots and subplots and a hundred different things going on. Give him some room to breathe and develop over the next couple of volumes. (I also argue that if you have any critical thinking skills whatsoever, we actually have quite a lot on who he is as a person at the very least, even if we still know nothing about his backstory. Speaking of which!!! Did we get Ren’s backstory in volume 1 or 2? No! It came in volume 4. How about Ruby’s or Yang’s? Nope. Their backstory was piecemealed out across the earlier volumes. Weiss’s? Same thing. Blake’s? Same thing. Qrow’s? … you get my point. If you want a straightforward biography, don’t watch fiction.)

*deep breath*

Anyway, my point is that I’ve seen more than one comment complaining about shippers and even romantic relationships in canon because, somehow in some people’s opinion, interpersonal relationships (particularly romantic ones) detract from the story. But do you want to know what story is built on? What the best stories absolutely revolve around? Character. Wanna know what you have to have for good characters? Individual mental and emotional development. Change. And yes, relationships.

The relationship between Clover and Qrow (or Nora and Ren or Blake and Yang or anyone else) doesn’t exist in a vacuum. It’s all a part of the tapestry of the story that is RWBY. Pull the relationships out and you have something threadbare and boring as hell. I love the plot. I love the fight scenes. You have no idea how excited I am to see Qrow in action in the next episode, particularly as a member of a team again. I want some Harbinger action as much as the next person. But that’s not what keeps me coming back every week. I want to see Qrow fight because I love him as a character. Because I want to see how he’s changed, how he’s developed, how he’s going to function in this team unit after being alone for so long. The fights mean nothing to me if I don’t care about the characters involved. And a plot not driven by character motivation and change (while possible) too often feels forced and contrived. You want a good natural, genuine feel to a plot? Then what you’re looking for is a plot that is character-driven. And what did I just say about the things needed for good character?

Look, if some of you are totally fine checking in every week just to see some combat action, that’s cool. Whatever works for you is what works for you and I’m not going to criticize you for it. But don’t you dare come after those of us who are here for characters and character development like we’re some substandard blight on the fandom. Can shipping get out of control? Absolutely. Are relationships written badly in fiction all the time and are thereby guilty of detracting from a story? Of course. But the relationships in RWBY, and particularly the relationship between Clover and Qrow, are not guilty of that. (Hell, this is a show all about relationships and the strength we can get from those we love and care about! What the hell do you think activates Ruby’s eyes???) This relationship, like every other one in the show, is there for a reason, and as much as some of us (myself unapologetically included) might screech about the eye contact and the flirting and the potential meaning behind the tiniest interactions, there is a depth inherent in their connection that goes beyond a surface level romance. It’s all about who they are, what drives them, what they have to overcome, what changes they might still need to go through, what roles they still have to play in the story, and how they might push each other in new and different ways to become who they need to become in order to do what they need to do.

And that, my friends, is what we’re actually here for.

#fair game #lucky charms #luckbirds #qrowver #qrover #qrow branwen #clover ebi #rwby7 #rwby #getting a little tired of the disdain aimed at shippers #and at canon RWBY relationships in general #this show has been about interpersonal connections from the beginning #are some of y'all just tone deaf when it comes to underlying story theme or....? #was gonna be salty in the tags #but i'll refrain #not our fault if you missed the whole theme of the show though

[give-me-back-my-rhodey]

Here We Are, Born to be Kings - AUgust Day 9

Title: Here We Are, Born to be Kings

Author: Purple_ducky00

Rating: Teen

Warnings: N/A

Pairing: Rhodey/Tony

Square Filled: G2 Dramatic Proposal

Link: Read on AO3

Summary:  Prince James is in love with Lord Tony Stark, a childhood friend. However, the Starks have been disgraced due to embezzlement charges. Can they overcome this?

++++++++++

“Your Highness. Lord Stark is here to see you.” Quentin Beck holds up his nose.

 Prince James Rhodes rolls his eyes. It’s not like Beck should judge. He was only hired because his family was in serious debt.  Tony is working out of his.

 Tony walks in a few minutes later, hair askew. “Wow, Rhodey, your servants hate me. I call it an achievement.”

“They just think it’s ok to judge since their scandals happened long ago enough for people to forget. You don’t deserve this.”

 “I probably do.” Tony shrugs. “It doesn’t bother me. Actually, it gives me the chance to ditch my politeness because they already dislike me.”

 “Oh for that luxury,” Rhodey sighs. He hates the protocol he must go through. Maybe that’s why he finds Tony so refreshing.

 They first met at a football match. Tony was on the other team, and he told the young prince, “We’re not playing any easier because you’re the prince. So, be ready for that.”

 Rhodey laughed and started playing. Tony’s team was clearly better, and they defeated Rhodey's team easily. After the game, Tony invited him to grab some lunch. They have been fast friends ever since.

 Now, Rhodey is 22 and Tony is 21. Tony’s father died last year, and Tony inherited his estate. After going over the numbers, Tony’s godfather, Obadiah Stane informed him that Howard had been falsifying records and was basically bankrupt.

 Dazed and reeling from his parents' sudden death, Tony doesn’t know what to do with this information. He reaches out for help, but as Howard had been stealing money from his peers, everyone refuses to help him. Rhodey offers to bail him out completely. Tony won’t let him. He decides he will work to pay off his father's debts.

 Tony was always incredibly smart. His patented inventions were used worldwide. He decides to start his own company, Stark Enterprises, where he builds and sells hi-tech machinery and entertainment devices. As his company quickly grows, he branches out into clean energy and satellites. Not even a full year after starting his company, Tony is very successful. With only Stane and his PA, Pepper Potts, at his right hand, Tony makes sure that he himself takes care of the books. Every entry is painstakingly entered and checked by the big boss himself.

 Rhodey is very proud of his friend, but it seems that his family is the only one in the kingdom that is. King Terrance and Queen Roberta love the young man as a son, but they often wonder if he is taking on too much, causing his sleepless nights and unhealthy eating habits. Tony waves them off saying he had had those problems before his parents had died.

 Prince James’ PR agent tells him that finding someone to date might be a good look for him. Everyone is looking for news of the royal family, and they will only assume the worst if they don’t hear from each member. Queen Roberta’s cooking classes and bingo games are televised. The king does a podcast twice a month. Jeannie plays tennis professionally. James is the only one without a big public profile, and he prefers that. However, there are some people who think that James is being pushed out of the spotlight or being abused in some kind. To quell any quickly rising rumors, Rhodey agrees to attend sports matches and talk to the press for a few minutes each time. When Tony’s not working his ass off, he often accompanies Tony.

 What Rhodey doesn’t tell his PR agent is the reason he doesn’t date. He is hopelessly in love with Tony and admitting that would be bad for a few reasons. 1.) Everyone in the country is against Tony. They would slander his name even more if they thought he had got his “money-grubbing claws” in the prince. 2.) Tony is straight. He had never told Rhodey otherwise, and he has only dated women as far as Rhodey knows. 3.) He doesn’t want any reason to make Tony uncomfortable in the only place he is welcome other than his home. So, he skirts the topic because fake dating is not his idea of fun.

 Now, Tony’s here and Rhodey knows he’s giving Tony heart eyes. “So, you’ve got a day off from me. What’s the plan, Rhodey?”

 “You pick today. I’m up for anything.” Rhodey trusts that Tony won’t do anything Rhodey can’t.

 Tony sits on the chair beside Rhodey. “I need to sit. I don’t think I’ve stopped moving for a week.”

 “So, what you’re saying is you need sleep.” Rhodey retorts.

“No, I need to spend time with my Rhodeybear. We never did that Star Wars marathon after Rise of Skywalker came out, did we?” Tony pokes him. “We can order like tons of pizza and greasy foods and bro it out like the old times.”

 Stuck in a theatre room with only Tony and highly unhealthy food? “Sounds like a great day. Let’s queue up the movies. I’ll have |Miss Cabe order our food. The usual?” Tony nods and heads off to the theater.

 Rhodey pulls out his phone and texts a maid, Bethany Cabe, to place an order for the following: an extra-large bacon pizza, two orders of cheesy curly fries, mozzarella sticks, and onion rings. Rhodey has cases of Tony’s favorite beer, so they did not need to worry about drinks.

 As they settle in to watch the movies, Tony tells him, “Wake me up if I fall asleep. I don’t want to miss Episode Six again.”

 “Come on Tones, Return of the Jedi isn’t the best.” Rhodey smirks.

 Tony glares at him. “It’s my favorite. Leave me alone. Go ahead and like Empire or whatever one you like the best. Geez.”

 “You know mine is Episode Three. The tragedy, the pain, the John Williams’ scores? A masterpiece.”

 “Anakin deserved better.” Tony mumbles as he eats a bite of pizza. Rhodey sighs. He’s heard this rant many times, and he’ll probably hear it again tonight. Tony really gets into these movies.

 Tony falls asleep at the end of A New Hope, his head falling on Rhodey’s shoulder. He looks so exhausted so Rhodey lets him sleep through Empire since Tony thinks it’s overhyped or something. Rhodey likes it. When Return of the Jedi starts, Rhodey nudges Tony awake. “Episode 6? Honeybear, you are an angel.” Tony kisses his cheek.

 By the time The Last Jedi comes on, both of the men are sleeping. Jeannette comes in to check on them and snaps a picture of Tony lying on top of Rhodey, both snoring away.

 Rhodey wakes up a few hours later and freezes. Tony is sleeping peacefully on him, his head on Rhodey’s chest. He doesn’t dare move in fear of waking Tony up. He slowly reaches for his phone and scrolls through Instagram and other social media apps until Tony wakes up.

 Tony wakes up slowly, but when he’s fully awake he jumps up and goes. “I’ve got to get to work!”

  “Hey Tony. It’s Sunday. We were going to spend Saturday and Sunday together, right?”

 “Oh. Oh. Whew. I thought.” Tony slumps. “Probably hallucinating from all that grease.”

 “Maybe we should get a little more sleep in a real bed.” Rhodey suggests. Tony nods, and they walk up to Rhodey’s room. Since they were kids, Tony always slept in Rhodey’s bed with him. They only ever slept and/or cuddled, and Rhodey has a king bed in case either of them needed their own space.

 They go to Jeannie’s tennis match then accompany her to an expensive Italian restaurant for dinner. The next morning, there are pictures splashed across the tabloids. Stark trying to get in with the Royal Family? Read more on page 3! One says. The Apple Doesn’t Fall far from the Tree – Another Gold-Digging Stark! Rhodey shakes his head. He was afraid this would happen. He calls his PR agent, Maria Hill.

She answers with a “Now do you see why having a partner would be good?”

 “Yes. Do you have any candidates who would be willing to date with no sex and/or strings attached? For public only?”

 “You don’t know how many celebrities only hope for that. Let me see which ones I can get. I’ll send you over a packet when I get them.”

 When he gets the packet, Rhodey isn’t surprised to find that 75% of them are women. Skipping through them, he tells Maria to reach out to an A-list actress Natasha Romanov. She is a beautiful woman, and they seem to have a lot of the same likes and dislikes. She agrees to meet with Rhodey at a small café near the palace. He introduces himself as Rhodey, then corrects it to “James or Jim” when Romanov gives him an odd look. “I’m sorry. My best friend always calls me Rhodey. It’s just what I expect now. I mean, if you want to call me that in private, it’s fine. Maria thinks it’s better if you call me James or Jim when talking with the press.”

“Tell me about this best friend.” Natasha leans forward. “He sounds like a nice guy.”

 Rhodey launches into a detailed description of Tony: his strengths, his flaws, his quirks, etc.  When he’s done, she asks, “And you’re dating me because you can’t date him?”

 “How did you…?”

 “You’re in love with him. Just look at your face. It’s ok. I won’t tell the press. I have almost the same problem. I’m in a poly relationship with a different celebrity couple. However, since Hollywood, even with its sex scandals, still looks down on poly relationships. I need a beard to keep our activity on the downlow. Is that acceptable for you?”

 Rhodey nods. “Of course. And you’re right. I love Tony, but I need to keep the press out of his life. His father put him through a lot, and he’s trying to make up for Howard’s sins. He doesn’t need the extra press coverage. Also, I don’t know if he likes me like that. I’ve never seen him date a guy.”

 “Well, I’d like to meet him.”

 +++++++ Natasha and Tony eventually meet. Tony is happy to meet her, but Rhodey feels that Tony is wearing one of his many masks. |When they kiss goodnight, Natasha tells him, “Rhodey, he likes you.”

 “Not that I want to doubt you, but I’m highly doubtful on this one here.”

 A few months pass, and Natasha and Prince James are photographed at red carpet events, at sports games, and at galas. Rumors are spreading that Prince James might propose soon. Natasha shows up at the palace for a surprise visit. “Hey, can we talk?” She pulls James from his family dinner.

 She tells him how the couple that she is dating are planning on coming out to the press as poly with her because they know some younger people who are receiving hate for their relationships. They want to be allies for such people. And they want her there when they come out. “Can we say we amicably split? I’d love to keep in contact with you.”

 “That sounds good.” His phone pings. He has a google alert set up for Tony because the press likes to come up to him for hostile interviews at the most inopportune times. James does his best to save him. “Listen Nat, I will talk to my publicist, but I have to go.”

 The press has trapped Tony on the palace driveway. “What do you think of Prince James marrying Ms. Romanov?” One reporter asks.

 “I didn’t know they got engaged, but I think they are an excellent match. Well-suited for each other.” Rhodey can see Tony is keeping his press face on but was not ready for the sudden press conference.

 Another reporter sneers. “We know you were trying to get a piece of the royalty. Will you try for the princess now that the prince is spoken for?”

 “Excuse me?” Tony reels. “What are you talking about?”

 “They’ll never have you. You’re just a charity case to them. What do you think of that? Did you think Prince James really liked you? Especially after what your father did?” Another reporter shoves a microphone in his face.

 Tony loses his mask. “Do I think Rho- Prince James really liked me? I have known the prince since we were young teenagers. I know he likes me… as a friend. But anything more? No. He never did, never will. I know what my father did; I know what I have to do to fix it. My father and Prince James have no correlation. What are you even trying to say here?” Rhodey can see the pain in Tony’s eyes. They flash when he says that Rhodey will never like him as anything more as a friend.

 “Excuse me.” Rhodey steps forward. “Can you step away from him, please?”

 The press apologizes and steps away. “Now, I want to say this once more and hopefully never again. Lord Stark is not his father. Lord Stark is paying his father’s investors back as quickly as he can. He started up his business on his own with his trust fund from his maternal grandmother. Howard never saw or added to a penny of that fund. What is the point of hating a man for the sins of his father? Keep rolling. I am talking to the country as a whole. Leave him alone, please. I want to say one more thing. Tony Stark, you are the love of my life. The reason I have not dated is because the only person I have ever loved was you. Yes, Natasha and I dated, but we did to keep other things hidden. I’m sure she will let you know at some point. It’s not my job. Tony, again, I love you. I want to spend the rest of my life with you and perhaps rule with you. I do not have a ring yet because I had not planned to propose to you in front of live TV today, yet here I am. Will you make me the happiest man in the world and marry me?”

 “You’re serious?” Tony gasps.

 “Completely.”

 “Then Rhodey, my Honeybear, my Platypus, my Sourpatch, I will marry you in a heartbeat.” Tony smiles widely, and Rhodey kisses him deeply, in front of the cameras. As they turn to the palace, Tony turns back to the cameras, lifts his middle finger, and says, “Fuck you” whilst smiling sweetly.

 ++++++ The country is so shocked at Prince James’ dramatic proposal. People wonder if Tony is a good fit for the prince due to his blatant disregard for protocol. Princess Jeannie posts the picture she took of them sleeping in the theatre room on Instagram, the caption “I knew it.” She broke the internet with the most likes on an Instagram post.

  Tony goes through his numbers and his father’s numbers again to make sure everyone is paid off. While looking at his father’s records again, he notices some discrepancies from Obadiah’s report. The truth comes out – Howard had not done anything wrong; it was Obadiah. He falsified documents, records, and even bills to give him much more money. Obadiah is fired and imprisoned. Tony’s name is cleared. Anthony Stark marries Prince James Rhodes a happy man.

#ironhusbands #royalty au #tony stark doesn't give a care #ironhusbands bingo 2020 #ironhusbands bingo #au_gust_2020 #i write!

[elleonmybeloved]

Field Day

Title: Field Day Author: PinkPerfume Fandom: Shall We Date? Obey me! Pairing: Asmodeus/MC Rating: Teen & Up Chapter: 1/? Tags: Demon & Angel Blood AU, Demons are slightly larger than in cannon by about a foot or two each, Secret Crush, Awkward pining, Asmodeus is hoe-rny as usual, Flirting, Leading up to that explicit rating in the second chapter cause you know me Read on AO3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25145122/chapters/60926767

Summary:

Once a week, the human exchange students, accompanied by the seven demon brothers as well as Lord Diavolo and a few of his subordinates make a trip to a rocky place out in the wilderness of the Devildom to conduct physical testing on the humans’ developing abilities. Mary-Catherine and her fellow once-humans aren't sure why Lord Diavolo injected them with the demon and angel blood that gave them their abilities, but participation in the testing is mandatory. But if you forget the part where they're being tested like lab rats, it feels a lot like a fun school field day! Complete with packed lunches and a friendly sense of competition.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“I hope you’re ready to eat my dust this time. I’ve grown two inches since last week.”

“Don’t get a big head. You got dog demon blood, not speed demon. Besides, not being able to spit acid at obstacles in your way is gonna slow you down.”

“I’d really appreciate it if you stopped doing that. Just because you look a lot more like a snake now doesn’t mean you need to act like one.”

“- Demon cobra. Not just a snake.”

“I know you’re proud of that, but honestly, I’m more jealous of the girl who got hawk demon blood. You know she has wings now, right?”

“What?! They shouldn’t let her participate in the race, it’s totally not fair.”

“It’s not actually a race, you guys.”

“Just because they’re testing us doesn’t mean we can’t have a little fun with it. Lord Diavolo encouraged us to be competitive.”

Excited chattering and the rumble of the vehicle’s engine made for a charged atmosphere that Mary-Catherine was enjoying listening to, leaning her head against the glass of the window to hide her amused smile at the antics. Choosing to survey the odd shapes of plants and pigmented rock passing by outside as she listened, she angled her head so that the small tightly curled horns at her forehead weren’t scraping against the glass.

Once a week, the human exchange students, accompanied by the seven demon brothers as well as Lord Diavolo and a few of his subordinates made the trip to a rocky place out in the wilderness of the Devildom to conduct physical testing on the humans’ developing abilities.

Piled into some kind of all-terrain vehicle with such ridiculous ground clearance that Mary-Catherine had needed assistance to haul herself up into it, they were shuttled to the testing site. The vehicle was huge and had several rows of seats, so everybody just called it “The Bus.” Before them on the long straight road, the Demon lord’s sleek black limo - driven by Barbatos - led the way down the path.

Turning off on the dirt path, they pulled up to the site. As the passengers - twenty-five strong, counting the brothers - filed out of the vehicle, they cordoned off into groups like a separation of oil and water.

Mary-Catherine confidently placed herself next to the people she knew best. Donte - a young man with horned-toad demon blood who she’d never seen not dressed up in attractive punk outfits that suited his dark brown curls and yellow-green striped horns perfectly. Despite all the purple dust out here, she had yet to see any of it attach itself to his outfit.

Meanwhile, both her thick cargo pants and her usual red tank top already had a few purple smudges.

To his left, Emma, a curvy young woman in all black whose sharp feline teeth glinted against her dark lipstick, and though the pair of furry black ears at the top of head twitched invitingly, you’d have to be stupid to touch them - or any part of her - without her explicit say so. Her claws were just as sharp as her eyeliner and stung quite badly.

Mary-Catherine had never heard her give anyone that say so. Only repeated threats to anybody who would listen about just exactly the kind of dark apocalypse she would continuously rain on Diavolo and the demon brothers & co. until they returned her cat Lucy to her, or vice versa.

Standing aloof with a familiar thoughtful expression to her right, a picture of elegance and maturity that M-C only hoped she’d one day achieve, was Annika. The blonde witch had a silent strength and seemed the least phased about her residency in the devildom of all the humans Mary-Catherine knew. She even stood up to Lucifer on a regular basis.

Mary had to avoid flinching like a startled lamb every time he looked in her mere direction. In her defense, she was part sheep now, and she had no reason to believe demon sheep were any braver than those in the overworld. Though as recent months had attested, they had the same urge for salt and were about 5 times faster than a regular one running at full tilt.

Once given their instructions, and oddly-shaped “evaluators” to attach to their D.D.D.s, the four of them plus a few she was less familiar with made off for the climbing ground. As usual, the groups moved around three areas in a rotation. A rock-littered circuit of road for testing speed, agility, and endurance, a level field of purple grass and several small, dead-looking trees with painted orange Xs on them that served as a combat ground for testing offensive abilities, and a large outcropping of porous green rock to test their ability to scale rough vertical terrain.

Something of a makeshift security team, the demon brothers spread out to stand their usual guard over the three groups. Considering their powers and how each demon towered at least a foot over any regular human even in their “human” forms, on their very first outing Mary-Catherine had foolishly assumed none of the other occupants of this realm would dare try to attack the group.

Grimacing as she tied up her hair and prepared to climb, she tried to blink away the image of the explosion of goop and gore and the charred remains that had been left of the few dissenting demons who’d scarcely touched her human companions before Satan had reduced them to pulp. Though unsure of how Lucifer had torched the ones who’d gone after his group, she was pretty sure she’d never get the image of their blackened skulls out of her mind.

“What’s with the long face? You’re still the reigning champion of this rock, goat-girl.”

Looking up, she recognized the self-proclaimed “cobra” guy from earlier on the bus. Despite his competitive statement, the grin on his face was friendly. His curly black hair and olive skin tone made for a vivid contrast against his vertical pupiled green eyes. She’d seen him a few times at breakfast and wasn’t certain but she thought his name was Kevin?

“Oh nothing. I was just wondering if they were going to make me lick more rocks today. Kind of reminds me of when I used to chaperone church summer camp and all the kids would collect rocks and dare each other to hold it in their mouth for twenty seconds or eat a worm.”

Mary-Catherine paused, “-But my horns alone would’ve been even more scandalous than the time one of the adults caught someone with a Harry Potter book sooo I guess it’s not really that similar!”

“Oh trust me I doubt my mamá would be happy to see what I look like now, but that doesn’t mean I would say no to a chance to become spiderman.”

“Hey, if anybody is becoming spiderman, I think it might be me.” Donte spoke up from behind them, looking incredulously at his hand which was pressed against the wall of rock. “Check this out.”

He then demonstrated how with an odd suction noise, his hands clung to the rock of their own accord. Prying them off and then repeating the motion, he got better at the detachment process with each press.

“Maybe poisonous demon frogs can stick to things?” Mary-Catherine mused. “I watched this discovery channel episode on tree frogs once that explained how their secretion of toe pad mucous-”

“-Mucous?!?” Donte scrutinized his hands in dismay, but after finding no such secretions he breathed a sigh of relief. “The only thing getting on my hands is this rock while I climb it’s ass. See you at the top!”

Pressing the start button on her evaluator, she climbed up after him, hearing Kevin start his descent as well. She’d gotten a bit of experience with this sort of outdoors stuff at previously said church-camp, but that was nowhere near her current condition, as she easily overtook both of her human companions with no regard for the steepness of her path. Back then, she’d needed a hardness and ropes. Now, she sought out each handhold instinctively like the top of the rock was calling her.

“At least I’m not bleating.” She sighed, and from below her Kevin barked out a laugh.

“I imagine it would come out sounding more like a warbled growl.” He said. “I’ve seen the pictures you know.”

“Hey- don’t go looking at a girl’s demon pictures!” A girl lower down on the rock called up to them.

Mary-Catherine blushed and hastily pulled herself up the remaining few feet of the rock and rolled to the side as she clicked stop on her evaluator.

“Not her pictures, the pictures of whatever they injected her with!” Kevin complained, but M-C could hear the mirth in his voice.

Walking over to a smoother patch of rock, she sat down to wait for the rest of them to finish their climb. Gazing at the ground far below her, she noticed Emma and Beelzebub talking next to a couple of camp-chairs.

She had noticed before that as an act of cat-less mutiny, Emma often refused to take part in the tests, but as M-C watched her speaking amicably with the demon beside her, who was eating… something round and dripping a brightly colored liquid she could make out from here, Emma gestured towards the rock several times with a wistful expression.

Rising to get a better look, Mary-Catherine began absent mindedly stretching, catching her ankle and bending her leg with a gentle pull.

It was a bit too far for her to make out exactly what they were saying - though some of her genetically enhanced fellow humans probably could - but M-C imagined that Emma was saying something along the lines of how much she wanted to climb the ‘actual shit outta that rock’ but wouldn’t budge an inch until they gave her back her precious Lucy. Beel seemed to nod sympathetically and despite not halting in his eating process, continue the conversation.

And then he moved to grab another of whatever it was he was eating, revealing the other demon who had come to watch over the climbing group. Having used the absolute swole unit of his demon brother’s body to provide him with shade, the Avatar of Lust reclined elegantly in - well it wasn’t really a camping chair, but it looked like it could be collapsed and relocated - his seat, meticulously painting his nails.

Freezing awkwardly midstretch, both arms clasped high above her head, she was for the hundredth? thousandth? time struck by just how gorgeous of a man Asmodeus was. Not a man, she reminded herself, a demon. Good Lord in Heaven, those arms… he had his sleeves rolled up to his elbows to avoid getting nail polish on his shirt, and it exposed the beautiful lean muscle of his forearms. Burnt amber eyes focused intensely on his handiwork, his pale perfectly shaped lips pursed in concentration… he had an angular face that made him look like both like the dangerous being he was, and a sculpture of an angel at the same time.

As if aware he was being ogled, he paused his preening and turned his head, looking up her way at the top of the rock. Panicking, she hastily looked elsewhere, pretending to continue her stretches as if she hadn’t been meaning to glance in his direction…

Nothing to see here!

Soon the others joined her at the top of the rock, and with the protection of anonymity, Mary-Catherine risked another gaze his way.

Oh good, he’s back to working on his nails.

Getting caught looking at people was so awkward, hopefully he hadn’t thought anything of what he saw of her brief gaze. She was pretty sure she was safe, it was unlikely he was that interested in any measly humans anyways.

“So what was your score?”

Mary-Catherine spooked so hard she jumped, turning to give Kevin a wounded look.

“You’re a jumpy one, huh? Must be those prey instincts. Well, what was it?”

“A minute and forty three seconds.” Mary-Catherine said, wondering what kind of predator hunted sheep demons. Probably had lots of teeth.

“Guess I just need to be a minute and fifteen seconds faster next time.”

“I’m sure you can do it.” She said, giving him an encouraging smile. “If they ever decide to hand out a prize, you’ve got it in the bag.”

“Now there’s an idea.” Donte piped up, moving into step beside them as the group began to descend the smooth sloped side of the rock. “I already know what I want as a prize.”

“What do you want?” She couldn’t really think of anything a demon would have to give as a good present. She’d seen their food. And the mall. They had weird taste.

“Not telling.” Donte said in a cheeky tone that even she could read as being… salacious in nature. Annika gave him one of her disapproving mother looks and it just made him sprout a mischievous little grin.

“I’ve had my eye on a spellbook in Satan’s library I would very much like to have.” Annika said, as if trying to steer the conversation off the downhill path it was otherwise going. It was a good thing Emma wasn’t here or that’d be a moot effort.

“Uhhh, boring!” Kevin crossed his arms. “Come on guys, we’re practically in hell. I want a weapon or something with strong dark magic powers.”

One of the other girls agreed with him, and began a very enthusiastic conversation about swords and axes and other sharp pointy things. Mary-Catherine considered the question herself for a few moments, but the only thing she could think of was for Lucifer to give her her Bible back. He’d taken it away a couple weeks ago after she’d done something he hadn’t approved of and used it as an excuse to confiscate the book. She wasn’t even sure how he’d known she had it, but maybe he’d been under the false impression that she was religious?

Normally she wouldn’t have been upset about such a thing, but even though she was no longer the good devout Catholic girl her parents had raised her to be, her grandmother had given her that Bible. They’d been quite close before she passed away five years ago to lung cancer. She was much too terrified of the fallen angel to even try to get it back though. Regardless, as far as prizes go that was a bit more personal than she was comfortable with sharing.

“I think a week off school would be nice!” She said instead, and was met with a resounding murmur of agreement from the crowd.

“How about a whole month?”

---

Under the protection of Belphegor and Leviathan this time, Mary-Catherine and her group took turns sprinting on the track. Unsurprisingly, Kevin’s dog demon-blooded friend blew all competition out the water. Once that guy got started he was like Usain Bolt on steroids. Though she put in the effort expected of her to avoid getting chided, M-C didn’t bother to run full tilt. She didn’t really like this part anyways. It was the most like a test, grueling and repetitive instead of fun, and reminded her of how she was here against her will.

She was grateful when they broke for lunch, gathering around a few hastily erected plastic tables. Taking the brown bag and two water bottles, she found a somewhat shady spot to sit under a scary looking tree and redid her sagging ponytail, lamenting the state of her side braid. She downed a whole bottle of water before getting into her food.

It was kind of funny, it was the same typical sandwich chips and apple combo she was used to on outdoor events like these, but the meat was purple and the lettuce that poked out at the sides was bright red. The fruit looked like an apple, but tasted like an orange and was the color of a banana.

She’d learned to just trust Lord Diavolo to know what humans could eat, and didn’t ask what everything was anymore. One of the transfer students had been curious at breakfast and as a result she had become aware of the fact that on several occasions she had ingested eggs from a reptilian demon species called an angiphore which looked like a cross between a platypus and one of those monstrous looking fish that lived really deep in the ocean.

The thought made her choke on her mouthful of water and most of it escaped out her lips down her throat to soak into the fabric of her top above her breast.

“Oh, gosh darn it.” Of course she had nothing to dab at it with. Well, at least the cool water felt kind of nice dripping down her neck, as hot as she was after such rigorous exercise.

“Oh my, looks like someone overestimated how much they could swallow~”

Mary-Catherine scarcely had time to process that someone had managed to approach her so silently before, bending elegantly at the waist, Asmodeus himself was already pressing a handkerchief against her neck with a chiding tut.

At her stiff reaction, he smiled, looking very much like the cat that ate the canary. “It’s nothing to be ashamed of sweetie, you’re not the first one to do such a thing.”

Mary-Catherine flushed and searched for a sufficiently indignant reply, realizing he was making fun of her. But before she could come up with something, he moved in closer, dragging the cloth against her bottom lip. It was such a shamelessly demanding motion, silencing her with ease.

“You must’ve been thirsty, poor thing.” He crooned, and M-C decided to swallow her pride and just enjoy the opportunity to get such a close up look at his gorgeous face. At this angle, she could see how long his strawberry-blonde eyelashes were as they brushed the smooth, immaculate skin of his cheeks.

“It’s… pretty hot.” The words were already on her mind, so unfortunately that’s what came out of her mouth instead of denying such an obvious trap.

It was worth it for the delighted, full-teeth grin he made. “I agree.”

His fingers skirted the hem of her tank top, and with a gentle pluck, he lifted the fabric to dab a few times at the wet top of her breast. But instead of lingering, with a simple wink, he retracted the handkerchief and stood up before she could even begin freaking out about it.

“Thanks.” She said when her brain caught up, as he started to leave.

“Any time, honey.~” He replied without turning back, and was soon out of sight.

Mary-Catherine gave a dry swallow and reached for her water bottle.

~~~

The rest of the afternoon proved uneventful. Oviumalum, or the certain species of demon sheep blood she’d been injected with, apparently had the ability to rapidly elongate and thrust out their 4 sets of horns in front of them like some kind of projectile impaler. Their horns were also a key ingredient in a certain type of hallucinogenic drug, when ground to a powder.

The meager set of horns on Mary-Catherine’s forehead was sharp, and made of the same components, but so far showed no signs of developing any projectile abilities. As such, she simply had to hold still while they took a sample of her horns, ears, and tail and then was free to sit on the sidelines for most of the hour.

Lucifer had handed her a textbook about the properties of various demonic plants and encouraged her to study during the downtime.

“Like many here, you would do well to improve your academics. Here.” He’d said in that aloof tone, like she was some filthy human bug under his boot.

“Oh…” She’d said. “Well, actually, that’s-”

“You’re welcome.” He’d cut off her attempt to decline with a glare. “I hope I see an improvement in your grade reports soon.”

Mary-Catherine couldn’t help but shut up after that and bitterly open the book in obedience. His crimson stare, like the blood she was sure he was not hesitant to shed, was just too frightening. But, more interested in watching the increasingly bizarre developing abilities of her fellow humans, she’d just skimmed the pages and pretended to read.

Beside Lord Diavolo’s delight at Donte’s newfound ability, nothing else of note happened. It was amusing to watch Emma claw several inch deep scores into a variety of materials she’d never assume could even be scratched, so that’s what she’d done until they’d blown their whistle to announce that it was time to return to the House of Lamentation.

Now, she was trailing after the gaggle of tired, test-tried students, thinking about whether she was going to bathe, sleep, or eat first when they got home.

“Heeyyy, M-C!”

Looking up from where she’d been zoning out staring at her D.D.D, she glanced around. Had somebody called her name?

“Mary-Catheriiiine!!” A girl was jogging towards her, waving a hand to get her attention. It took her a moment, since it wasn’t someone she was very familiar with, but she connected the face to a name before the girl reached her.

“Yes? - Um, Hoya, right?”

“Yeah.” The girl said, smiling with a - ah. Shark demon blood. - large set of teeth. “Can I ask you a favor?”

“Of course! What is it?”

“I lost my ring up on the rocks.” Hoya said, pointing to the climbing wall. “I can see where it is but I can’t reach it myself. Can you get it for me?”

“Sure!” May-Catherine chirped, but then bit her lip. “Uh, did you tell Lucifer? It’s time to go and I’ll be fast but we’re going to make them wait…”

“Don’t worry, I told him. He said it’s fine as long as I hurry.”

“Oh. Okay!” M-C said, but couldn’t help squinting a little skeptically.

“...He said they’re leaving in ten minutes with or without us.” Hoya admitted. “But it won’t take us that long!”

Mary-Catherine was already moving. “Oh gosh, well I hope you didn’t mention my name…”

Hoya jogged next to her, long smooth grey tail wagging oddly like a dog. “Uh, I did. Sorry!"

Mary-Catherine groaned and high-tailed it to the rock.

#obey me! #shall we date? obey me! #asmodeus #asmodeus x mc

[anagentinwriting]

Subscribe - Part 8

Summary: (Modern AU) Peter was your college sweetheart until a certain event led to your break up. Seven years later another event brings you two back together, but this time a little girl is in the picture. Will listening to your podcasts be the reason you two get back together or be another reason to keep you apart?

Pairing: Peter Quill x Reader

Word Count: 3116

Warnings: Angst, Fluff

Subscribe Masterlist / Main Masterlist

You got released from the hospital three days ago, and you were already sick of sitting at home. You cleaned the whole house from top to bottom twice since no show or book could grab your interest. And with Meredith being at school for most hours of the day, you were bored out of your mind being home alone. You wanted to go back to work but couldn’t start till next week, which meant three more days of nothing.

Somehow, you convinced your doctor and Pepper to allow Wanda to work out of the office at your house today. You finally got to do something different, even if it meant planning Peppers trip to New York next week. You and Wanda started working on it, then the accident happened, so Wanda has been working on it by herself. She was a little lost, but she managed to figure out a few things from all your random sticky notes. 

“The talent has arrived,” Wanda shouted as she entered your front door.

“I’m upstairs. I ordered Chinese for us. It should be here shortly,” you shouted from Meredith’s room upstairs.  “I’ll be down in a bit. I’m almost done folding laundry.”

“Alright, I will...” Wanda started, getting interrupted by a knock on the door. “Get the door,” she whispered to herself. She pulled open the door, digging through her wallet. “Hi, how much was it again?”

“Excuse me?” Wanda glanced up to see a guy with a confused look on his face.

“You’re not the usual morning delivery guy?”

“No...um does YN live here?” He asked as his eyebrows came together, forming a crease between them. 

“Does she owe you money?” 

“No.”

“Did she hit your car?”

“Ah...no.”

“Then, yes she lives here and who might you be?” Wanda crossed her arms across her chest, eyeing him up and down.

“Peter. I'm an old friend.” He stuck out his hand, and she shook it.

“Wanda.”

“Oh, like from the podcast?”

“Yes,” she chuckled, watching him with suspicion. “So you’re apart of the small percentage of guys who listen to it.” He shrugged with a smirk. “What can I do for you? YN is a little busy at the moment.”

“I wanted to catch up on some things. Gamora told me she would be home today since she is going back to work next week.” Peter answered, hoping to get his point across. 

“She is. Somehow she convinced the doctor to let her because she’s going insane sitting around all day.”

“She was always the busy body,” he smirked, nodding his head.

“You’re right about that, Peter.” Wanda agreed. She stared at him for a moment longer trying to place where she might’ve seen him before, or a time YN talked about him. “I'm sorry, but I have to ask Peter; YN has never mentioned anything to me about a guy named Peter.”

“That doesn’t surprise me,” he stated. “There is another name you might know me by it’s…”

“How do I know you’re not some crazed stalker fan of the show?” Wanda asked, interrupting him.

“No. I’m not that at all. Trust me,” he replied, holding his hands up in front of him. “I only learned about the podcast a few weeks ago from Meredith.” 

“So, you know YN’s daughter, too?”

“Yeah, she’s a great little lady. She has her mother’s spunk and curiosity. She carries the weight of the world on her little shoulders, and puts on a brave face when she wants to be strong for everyone else,” he replied while Wanda nodded, agreeing with him half listening and half zoning out. “She’s my daughter.”

A second later, Wanda’s head snapped to him as the realization dawned on her. She stared at him, tilting her head to the side almost as if she was reading his mind. “Can you like chill for a sec,” Wanda proclaimed, slamming the door in his face and ran up the stairs. 

You put the last of Meredith’s laundry in her drawer when Wanda barged into the room out of breath. She stood with her hands clutching her knees, trying to catch her breath. “Whoa, Wanda! You alright?”

“YN, your um…your um…” She heaved, trying to catch her breath. 

“My what?”

“Star-Lord...is...downstairs.” 

“Wait, what?” You stared at her with big round eyes.

“Gamora told him to stop over,” she breathed. “Why do you have so many steps?”

“She never said--” you furrowed your brows together “--I'm...I'll be back.”

“Yeah. You go girl.” She collapsed on Meredith’s bed, pumping her fist in the air. “You get him, girl.”

You stood by the closed door, seeing a reflection through the textured glass window. He’s here. What were you going to say to him? Why didn’t Gamora tell you he was going to stop by? At least you could've better prepared and made yourself presentable. You glanced in the round mirror next to the door, trying your best to look approachable. You took a deep breath and opened the door to see Peter’s back. The small creek in the door made him turn around and smile at you. 

“Hi, YN. You’re looking better...ah...Gamora told me you’re going back to work soon, so I thought I would come to visit you before then. I wanted to check up on you anyways and thought we could catch up.”

“Is this because you found out about Meredith?”

“Yes and no. For one, I didn't know you moved to Malibu after college.”

“There’s a lot you don't know about me.” You opened the door wider, inviting him in. You walked with him to your office to get a bit more privacy even though Wanda would be holding a glass to the door regardless. Peter moved to the chair in front of the desk but waits for you to sit first. “Did you want anything to drink?”

“I'm okay. Thanks.” You nodded. “How are you feeling? I heard a little about your job at Potts of Honey producing a podcast. Sounds fun!”

“I'm doing better just tired of sitting around here all day.” You shrugged. “My job is pretty fun. Right now, I’m producing one podcast, but I'm planning on starting another one in the future.”

“I’ve listened to a few episodes, and it’s informative and funny. I also never thought of certain brands of diapers, bottles, or breast pumps being better than other brands. And how babies can be picky about what products they like and don't like. I’m learning a lot,” he smirked, eyeing you over. “I can tell you enjoy what you do. Both, you and Wanda, do a great job with what you are sharing with the world.”

“Thanks. She’s a good talent, and those are the topics people want to hear about. I'm kinda surprised you’ve listened to them,” you admitted, eyeing him over.  

“Well, I only started listening to them a couple weeks ago, so can't call me a lifelong fan.” 

“I see. Usually our demographic gears towards women, but I’m finding more men have started listening to it. I pegged you for the kind that wouldn’t.”

“I guess, there's a lot you don't know about me either,” Peter replied with an amused smirk. “I will say I am pretty fond of the Star-lord series as your fans call it.” You stared at him with wide eyes. “I am curious to why you decided to talk about us on there?”

“It’s a relatable topic. The podcast is about people sharing experiences, so I talk about what I know. I'm not going to make something up to get people to listen. Besides, it was Wanda who started it.” He chuckled, nodding his head, remembering the first episode he listened to with you on it; the not a date date. “I heard your record label became quite the overnight success story,” you inquired, hoping to get the topic off you. 

“It’s only a success because my partners are the best. If it was only me, I wouldn’t have come close to what I have been able to accomplish in this industry. It’s a crazy business, especially when you’re trying to find new talent and some can be relentless about getting noticed. Like there's this one high school girl from Queens, her boyfriend keeps calling and sending demos. It can get pretty ridiculous.”

“You should give her a shot. She might be a nice, fresh young face to add to your label.”

“You’re probably right about that. Maybe she’s worth another look.”

You heard the doorbell ring and excused yourself to get the door. You opened it, paying the delivery guy, and took everything into the kitchen. You rested your hands on the counter and took a few deep breaths to calm your nerves. This whole thing will be over soon, and then you can go back to living your life without Peter. Why is he even here? You stepped back into your office to find Peter staring at the collage of picture frames on the wall. 

“She has your spunk, you know,” Peter stated, smirking at the pictures. 

“My what?” You narrowed your eyes at him. 

“You know that...strength, curiosity and determination. Set your mind to it, and you’ll get the job done.”

“I'm not the only one she gets it from,” you confessed, forcing your favorite boyish smile onto Peter’s face. You ignored it as best you could, and pointed at one frame from her birthday party a couple of years ago.

“This was her fifth birthday, and she became obsessed with space and anything to do with it. I swear she watched every movie about space, including Despicable me.  It was a crazy time,” you smiled at the memory. 

“Mer mentioned that you never told her my name,” Peter inquired, glancing at you out of the corner of his eye.

“I didn't. I told her I used to call you Star-lord. It could be the reason she loves space so much,” you breathed with a slight smirk. “I told her everything she wanted to know about you, like how you’re a great guy with a caring heart. You love music and movies, and how you still think Footloose is the greatest movie ever.”

“It still is and will always be,” he confirmed with a straight face. “I guess what I don’t understand, is why did you only tell her the good things?”

“Why would I tell her anything different?”

“Well, the way we ended things was pretty bad.”

“If I told her the bad things and how I hated you for hurting me, she’d think I'd hate the part of her that is her father.” He nodded, realizing your reasoning. “I’m not going to brush my opinions of you on her when she didn’t even know you. I’m not going to make her think less of you because she’s never met you” You went back over to your desk, taking a seat. You let out a deep breath and bit down on your bottom lip. “Why are you here, Peter?”

“Isn’t it obvious.” He shrugged his shoulders. “Finding out I have a seven-year-old daughter from my ex’s sister, you can imagine my surprise.” You remained silent as your eyes moved to stare at the top of your desk. “I was a little freaked, to say the least. I never could keep a goldfish alive for more than a week, how was I going to keep another human being alive? I don’t know how you managed to raise her yourself, but you did. I guess I want to know, were you ever going to tell me about our daughter?”

“Yes, I was going to tell you at some point,” you paused before continuing. “I remember when Mer was about three years old, I was barely making ends meet and Gamora was doing way more than she needed, too. I was at a low point in my life, but then I got an interview at Potts of Honey and things got better. Easier,” you said, reliving the memory. “Besides I didn't want your first meeting with her to be about money. I didn’t want it to seem like I was coming after you because Walkman Records hit it big. To be honest, I wanted to accomplish something and rub it in your face,” you admitted, forcing a soft chuckle out of him. 

“Typical, YN.” He shook his head, refusing to hide the growing grin on his face. “I am proud of you and how far you’ve come in your career. You also did an amazing job raising Meredith along the way,” he admired as his smile drifted away. “I’m sorry I wasn’t there for either of you.” Your eyes shot up to him.

“You have nothing to apologize for. It’s not your fault. I don’t blame you for not being there. It was my choice not to tell you about her.”

“I still feel like I owe you.”

“You don't owe me anything, Peter,” you snapped, raising your voice a bit.

“So then, why didn't you tell me about her sooner?” Peter questioned, biting his lip and keeping his eyes on you.

“I have…I have my reasons.” you sighed, looking away from him. 

“Which are?” 

“Can we not get into this right now?”

“Okay,” Peter paused, clearing his throat. “The reason I came by is I wanted to ask if um--” he sat back down, wringing his hands together “--if I could be more involved in Meredith's life. To be honest, I don’t know how to be a dad, but I don't want to be an absent father like mine was. I know it’s a lot to ask because you don’t trust me, especially with all that’s happened between us.” Peter took a deep breath before continuing, “I will take whatever I can get. Once a week, once a month, an afternoon, anything. All I want is to be apart of her life.”

You stared at him, not knowing how to answer. This surprised you. You never would’ve thought he would want to be apart of her life, let alone yours again. “Mer told me all about the little adventures you took her on while I was in the hospital,” you recalled. “It's been an earful, but every time she tells me about them, she's more excited than the last time. I can’t thank you enough for doing that. I appreciate you getting her mind off things because it’s exactly what she needed.”

“Happy I could help.” Peter nodded as a coy smile appeared on his face.

“How do you think she was doing with me being in the hospital? I mean, I got her side of the story and Gamoras, but since you spent the most time with her, you might have a better understanding.”

“I could tell at certain times it was hard on her. I don’t know if anyone else could see it, but she was scared. I mean, what little kid wouldn’t be seeing a parent like that?” Peter bit his lip, furrowing his brows at the ground. “Meredith’s a tough little girl. A lot like you in many ways. She wants to stay strong for everyone, but when it was the two of us, she was worried. I was, too.” He looked up, keeping a watchful eye on you. “All I tried to do was be there for her and do what I thought you would do in this circumstance.”

“Thanks for keeping a watchful eye on her. Gamora assumed something was going on with her, but Meredith can be hard to read sometimes,” you stated with a half shrug.

“Well, I knew her mother pretty well,” he smirked, making you shake your head at him. 

A comfortable silence fell between the two of you before you spoke up. “Mer continues to ask me about when she gets to see her daddy again." Peter's mouth twitched, trying to hide his smile. “Truth is I want you involved in her life, and since you want to be, I will not step between you two. She’s your daughter, too.” Peter broke into a full-blown grin, unable to keep the enjoyment off his face. “I was thinking instead of Mer coming to my work daycare after school, you could pick her up and hang out with her until I'm done with work. Gamora told me that worked well when I was asleep. Then after a while, you could take her one night over the weekend. Does that sound like something you would be interested in?"

“Yes, absolutely, I don’t know what to say.”

“You don’t have to say anything. I can text you the details, and we can start next week when I go back to work?”

“Yeah, sounds perfect. Thank you.”

After showing Peter out, you and Wanda got to work finishing the final touches of Peppers trip while scarfing down Chinese food. Wanda narrowed down which store sold the most of our products and scheduled a customer meetup at that location. You scheduled appointments with the realtor to view a few properties for the new Potts of Honey facility Pepper hoped to open up in New York within the next year.

“So, that Peter guy is Meredith's dad?” Wanda asked, trying to keep her voice calm. 

“Yup,” you answered between bites, jotting down some notes for Pepper to look over. You didn’t want to make a bigger deal out of this than necessary.

“You weren’t kidding about how good-looking he is,” Wanda agreed, ignoring her work.

“Hmm.”

“Bet he looks good naked, too,” Wanda winked in your direction.

“Sure.”

“Is that all you're gonna give me is one-word replies?” You shrugged, chewing your food. “Why was he here? How does he know about Meredith? Are you going to see him again?”

You took a sip of your drink, squinting your eyes at her. “One: He wants to get to know Meredith better and become more involved in her life. Two: He's known about her ever since my accident. Gamora and I agreed, if anything ever happened to me she would tell him. Three: I will see him again.”

“I bet you two are going to fall in love again,” she squealed, clapping her hands together.

“I don't know about that.”

“You never did tell me what happened between you two.”

“It's not something I like to talk about. I will talk about all the happy moments, but the breakup is something I’d rather forget. Sure, I talked about it in one of our episodes before, but I didn’t go into much detail about it. What I said on there is the extent I will go into sharing about what happened,” you stated, and Wanda shut her mouth and got back to work.

___________

AN: They finally talked well sort of. At least it’s a start! We got a little information about Meredith's life growing up and about the reader's struggles before she got a good job. Yet, their breakup still remains a mystery. Wonder what was said in that podcast she mentioned? Did it come as a surprise that she wanted Peter in Meredith's life? Do you think they will be able to co-parent together, or will it end in another disaster? Time will tell. As always thanks for reading for those that read these notes...haha! 

#Star-Lord #star lord x reader #star lord au #peter quill #peter quill au #peter quill x reader #peter quill reader insert #peter quill image #GotG #Guardians of the Galaxy #guardians of the galaxy vol 2 #Chris Pratt #marvel fanfic #Marvel AU #marvel

[noisemakerreviews]

Game of Thrones, 8:3 “The Long Night”

It’s been a while! What better way to come back from the dark is to review an equally as dimly lit episode of our favourite TV show. 

So, let’s get right into it.

Also, needless to say, this post is dark and full of spoilers, so beware.

We won’t get into the mechanics of strategy on Dany’s part, because sending the Dothraki in head-first while everyone else stayed behind and waited didn’t seem like the best course of action, but nobody questions the Unburnt without getting torched themselves, so you do you, Khaleesi. Let’s dissect that scene a bit more, because what more could we have asked for within the first five minutes than the Dothraki wielding fire-swords into the night? (I guess better lighting... thanks, Melisandre.)

This episode was chock-full of haunting and powerful images. Firstly, the Dothraki slowly being extinguished, both literally and figuratively. This is a huge loss for Daenerys and her army, and the Night King is chuckling from the cloud’s with the late Robert Baratheon’s, “Only a fool would meet the Dothraki in an open field” line all the way back in season one. 

The battle commences and all the MVPs are charging: Brienne --- ahem, Ser Brienne --- Jaime, Podrick, Sam, Edd, Tormund, the Hound, Beric, Grey Worm, Jorah, the list goes on. I must have gone into cardiac arrest at least seven times during the episode. I didn’t know I could hold my breath for an hour and a half, but here we are. The Battle of Ice and Fire had a very Battle of the Bastards-esque feel to it, which worked, and was full of action --- sometimes to the point that I couldn’t even make out if someone was dying or not. (Looking at you, Brienne, Tormund, and Jaime...)

Let’s move on to Jon and Dany exploring a whole new world atop Rhaegal and Drogon. An airborne fight that severely stressed me out, the aunt-nephew duo went after the Night King to try and end the fight before it began. Essentially, the only thing that was accomplished was the Night King being thrown from Viserion and Rhaegal getting injured. This scene was frustrating because I think that they could have used the dragons far more effectively, i.e., lighting up Viserion at the very least. We find out later that dragon-fire doesn’t have any effect on the Night King, but there’s no reason to believe that it wouldn’t have fatally injured Viserion. 

The crypts were, shocker, unsafe. But let’s hone in on that chilling scene between Tyrion and Sansa. Did anyone else think that a murder-suicide was about to transpire, or was that just me? The once-married couple shared a funny, but slightly heartbreaking conversation earlier on, and Sansa deemed Tyrion “the best of” her list of husbands. We see them later huddled behind a likeness of a late Stark, Sansa clutching her dragonglass dagger that Arya gifted her, and Tyrion taking her hand and bestowing a kiss against it. It’s a glimpse into the humanity the show captures beautifully amidst the literal end of the world. 

Moving on, we have to talk about our queen, our lord and saviour, our absolute G.O.A.T. ... Lyanna Mormont. Move over, Arya, we get that you saved the world, but we all know who the true woman of the series is. From the beginning, Lady Mormont was a force to be reckoned with and an instant fan favourite. Though we knew her chances for survival were slim to none this episode, I couldn’t have imagined a better way for her to go out. She struck fear into the hearts of men twice, even three times her size, all while looking cute as a button. Rest in power, Killer of Giants. 

Speaking of powerful, tiny women who men underestimate, we’ll discuss our other queen, Arya Stark. From the beginning she’s been an outcast, proving that she will not succumb to societal norms expected of women in Westeros. The only people who seemingly nurtured this tendency were Jon, who gave her the strong advice, “Stick them with the pointy end,” --- a line repeated to Sansa just before the battle began --- and Ned, her late father who we all still dearly miss. Arya snuck her way through the halls of Winterfell, her kill count climbing faster than she could run. Stress levels were high and I worried that the Girl with No Name was going to be no more, but the Kill Bill sirens activated and the Hound and Beric Dondarrion came in with the assist. Though we lost Beric, his purpose was finally served, and Melisandre greeted the Hound and Arya to reassure them that the Lord of Light’s plan is still in action.

Plus, Syrio Forel totally came back to us through the Red Woman. 

Theon is one of the most rounded characters on the show, and his development is astounding. It rivals that of Jaime Lannister, and as much as I want to hate the last male Greyjoy heir, I just can’t. His real life began and ended within the walls of Winterfell. The downfall of his journey started when he overtook Winterfell back in season two and ‘burned’ Bran and Rickon alive to gain power and stock with his followers. Of course, the youngest Stark boys were unharmed, but that doesn’t excuse the fact that Theon murdered two innocent children. Bran has since forgiven him, calling him a “good man” before the fighting begins. Theon fights until the end, and suffers an honourable death at the hands of the Night King, protecting Bran and keeping his promise until his dying breath. 

Just when we think all hope is lost, in true Game of Thrones fashion, a twist flies through the air (literally) and Arya’s talented knife-work ends the Long Night. I’m sure you screamed as loud as I did when every second of A Girl’s training led up to this moment, and all prophecies were fulfilled. 

I thought this choice to give the kill to Arya was a smart one. The Night King directly and physically embodies Death, and Death isn’t concerned with a power struggle, kingdoms, or battles. As Bran stated, the Night King is only concerned about the Three-Eyed Raven, and cleansing the earth of the living --- has he been talking to Thanos?

A fight with Jon would have been exciting, but it was evident by his survival of dragon-fire that the Night King cannot be defeated by sheer force or strength. Arya was the only one who could outsmart him, and the Night King could have only been feasibly defeated by a game of wits. Also, who doesn’t like a badass, strong female lead killing the second coldest villain in the show? Behind Cersei, of course.

Speaking of whom, I am sincerely anxious (and excited) for the latter half of the final season. Dany’s army has faced serious losses, such as the Dothraki and the Unsullied, and essentially she just has the manpower that survived the inner walls of Winterfell. Both of her dragons have been injured, though we see in the preview that they are able to fly. Cersei has 20,000 fresh troops, dragon harpoons, a mind sadistic and strategic enough to blow up half the city, and presumably the wildfire to bring that possibility to life. 

There is still a lot to come in the last three episodes, but if the Night King subplot is over, then this episode made all the waiting and speculating worth it. All in all, a solid episode with a solid plot, and a twist that people will be talking about for weeks, months, maybe even years to come.

All images courtesy of HBO. 

#review #tv show #pop culture #game of thrones #got #hbo #the long night #the night king #arya stark #lyanna mormont #daenerys targaryen #jon snow #sansa stark #the hound #grey worm #melisandre #beric dondarrion #brienne of tarth #jaime lannister #tyrion lannister #game of thrones review #white walkers #drogon #rhaegal #viserion #dragons #fantasy #game of thrones 8x3

[snkpolls]

SnK S3E16 Poll Results (Anime Only Viewer Version)

The poll closed with 177 responses. Thank you to everyone who participated!

Please note this is the anime only viewer version of the poll. Manga readers, please click here for the results of the manga reader poll!

RATE THE EPISODE 149 Responses

Overall the episode received positive ratings with a majority in the 4-5 range. This season seems to be one intense episode after another.

A bit slow but Erwin deserves all the time. Hope to see a lot of action next episode.

BEST EPISODE IN THIS SEASON SO FAR! Erwin’s speech and the suicide charge were so epic and had made me shed a few tears, especially with the last few seconds...

WHICH OF THE FOLLOWING WAS YOUR FAVORITE MOMENT? 157 Responses

Erwin gained a lot of focus this episode and fans were moved by many of his scenes. Leading his soldiers in a daring suicide charge barely topped at 27.4% with Erwin motivating those soldiers following at a close 24.2%. Meanwhile, 17.2% of respondents were most moved by Levi kneeling in front of Erwin and vowing to kill the Beast Titan.

The experienced scouts being torn apart by boulders in a rain of blood mist while screaming brought back dread I haven’t felt in a while.

WHO WAS THE EPISODE'S MVP? 157 Responses

No surprise that Erwin’s actions led him to be the MVP this episode at an overwhelming 89.2%. Levi doesn’t go unnoticed either.

Erwin cemented himself as best character again after this EP even though he’s screwed.

The Beast Titan was clearly the MVP of this episode.

HOW DO YOU FEEL ABOUT CONNIE MAKING A PUN ABOUT THE FALLING HOUSES? 157 Responses

There were a few mixed reactions to Connie’s pun about the falling houses, but the majority 28% found it amusing and think he should bring some kind of comedy in the middle of devastation.

WHAT WOULD YOU HAVE DONE IF YOU WERE ASKED TO JOIN THE SUICIDE CHARGE? 155 Responses

Despite almost certain death, over half of voters will choose to believe in the commander to lead them and hang on to the sliver of hope of survival. A little over a quarter, however, aren’t quite sure what they would do.

Disobey. Tag team with Levi and kill the other line of titans

Asking the reason to do it and act accordingly

Believing in commander was the choice to get crushed by Zeke as it was obvious that Erwin didn't have any plans but the only way for even 1% success was to bait themselves to give Levi an opportunity to take a charge on Titans as Erwin himself confirmed that Levi is the only person who could turn the tables now.so he trusted Levi's words and chose to take all the soldiers on their own demise as everyone knew that they would not survive but if their destruction means the survival of their families and people than they are happy to die

FUCKING SUSUMEEE

i would have never joined the military . too scary!

DO YOU THINK LEVI MADE THE RIGHT CHOICE TO FOLLOW ERWIN’S PLAN OVER HIS OWN? 155 Responses

42.6% of respondents agreed that taking down the Beast Titan no matter the cost is their best chance at victory. 38.7% believed it was their only choice.

HOW MUCH DID ERWIN’S INSPIRATIONAL SPEECH MOTIVATE YOU? 154 Responses

Erwin’s inspirational speech was enough to motivate even a majority of the polltakers to giving their all for the commander.

Erwins VA is orgasmic

SHINZOU WA SASAGEYO !

This is the only way for us to rebel against this cruel world

Susume!

WHO YELLED THE BEST INSULT TO BERTOLT? 150 Responses

The move to distract Bertolt resulted in some interesting insults from Jean, Connie, and Sasha, although 68% of participants believe Sasha’s “massive pervert lord” comment was the best one.

BEST SHOCKED FACE THIS EPISODE? 154 Responses

There were quite a few characters who were caught off guard in this episode. Levi’s frantic reaction to the flurry of boulders brought a rarely-seen shocked expression that 31.8% of people thought was best, followed by Erwin’s and Sasha’s that tied for second at 22.7%.

WHAT DO YOU THINK WILL BE ERWIN’S FATE? 156 Responses

The episode ended with Erwin getting hit by the Beast Titan’s boulder attack. A majority of respondents believe this is it for the commander but some are holding out hope for his survival.

Don't die Erwin :(

I Hope Erwin finds out the truth.

Erwin Smith probably dead :(

WILL LEVI SUCCEED IN KILLING THE BEAST TITAN? 154 Responses

While Levi is one of the Survey Corps’ best powerhouses, 64.3% of respondents believe Humanity’s Strongest will be unable to kill the Beast Titan. Although, 35.7% of respondents think he will succeed. No doubt Levi vs the War Chief will be an intense match!

HOW DID YOU FEEL ABOUT ARMIN TRYING TO TURN COMMAND OVER TO JEAN? 154 Responses

We saw Armin struggling to come up with a plan this episode, passing on the leadership to Jean to come up with something. Most of the respondents at 85.1% believe Armin and Jean would do better to collaborate and draw from each other’s strengths.

Jean>Armin at leading, Armin>Jean at strategizing

Jean better leader but Armins smarter but a pussio

Well Armin was under a lot of pressure and scared af so i kindda understand why he tried to turn command to jean

Armin needs to stop being a little bitch

WILL ARMIN FINALLY COME UP WITH A PLAN TO TRY TO DEFEAT THE COLOSSAL TITAN? 155 Responses

Despite their current hopeless situation, 47.4% of participants believe Armin will be able to come up with a plan but it won’t get the results he is looking for. 37% of voters think that Armin’s potential strategy will go off without a hitch.

Eren might activate the power of the coordinate, or Bertolt will flee

THE RED-HEADED CADET HAS BEEN GETTING MORE SCREEN TIME - THOUGHTS? 155 Responses

We got some heavy dialogue from one of the new cadets. A majority 35.5% of participants believe he is just another redshirt destined to die. 29% of participants believe his focus is foreshadowing a prominent role in the future, and 25.2% voters aren’t that interested either way.

He will be not that important but he will be a lot more in the story i think

I don't care (yet)

He will live then die in the future by betrayal.

i want him dead

the red head has a shit haircut

NOW THAT THE ARC HAS PROGRESSED MORE, WHICH CHARACTERS DO YOU THINK ARE LIKELY TO BE CONFIRMED DEAD/DIE? 144 Responses

A lot has happened since the first episode. Since Bertolt’s explosive transformation and the Beast Titan’s assault of the Survey Corps, people believe there will be quite a few named character casualties. 86.8% of voters are none too hopeful of Erwin coming out of this alive, while 59% think Moblit is toast, 52.8% think Marlowe will be knocked out of the park, and 48.6% believe Bertolt will meet his demise here. The rest of characters are given a lot of faith to survive this battle.

I feel like Connie and Sasha are doomed. If it’s gonna take all the scouts power to beat colossal, I feel like they are the two who he’ll pick off first.

ADDITIONAL THOUGHTS ON THE EPISODE?

Erwin is such great and the ambiance for this episode was awesome.

It gave me all the Eruri vibes and my fangirl heart can't take it cause Erwin will surely die. It was amazingly animated and all the emotions were well portraited. Best episode of this part of the season so far

The second half I by far the best portion of Attack on Titan so far :)

Erwins voice actor did an amazing job as usual, really hope be finds out what's in the basement but it's not looking likely

MY SOLDIERS, FIGHT! MY SOLDIERS, RAGE! MY SOLDIERS, SCREAM! 

WHERE DO YOU PRIMARILY DISCUSS THE SERIES? 147 Responses

Thanks to everyone who participated. We’ll see you again next week!

#snk spoilers #snk s3 #snk poll #snk polls #poll results

[soabas-world]

Barufel [The Greatest of Families] - Snippet

Episode Three – The Road Goes On

May 19th, 3, Fourth Age – Rivendell

“I rather believed that your husbands were never going to allow you out of their sights again, Gwathelion,” the Lord Elrond remarked wryly, when Bilbo tracked him down inside his uncle’s private library. “Nor were any of your Dwarven Kindred, for that matter.”

Elrond did, in fact, have good reason to believe this, Bilbo acknowledged, as his husbands, nephews, and brothers had been consistently behaving in a manner that one could rightly classify as overprotective since Bilbo had properly reunited with them all. They all seemed to be of the opinion that their Hobbit might vanish into thin air if they did not keep a proper watch of him on a constant basis. Bilbo rather despaired to imagine how much worse they were all going to behave once they were on the road and away from the safety of Rivendell.

“I snuck away while my older faunts were distracting them with their archery lessons. Tauriel and Lindir were ‘not arguing’ about the proper way to wear a quiver – and my children and the Company seemed to find such a conversation exceedingly amusing – when I slipped off the training field,” Bilbo admitted, shrugging. “I needed to talk to you and to give you this,” Bilbo nodded his head toward the grey cloth-wrapped parcel in his arms, “Without an audience.”

“You may always come to me, at any time and for any reason,” Elrond knelt down so that his dusk-silver eyes were level with Bilbo’s own, a tinge of regret in his voice. “I am quite loath to send you so far away from me, nephew mine, even if it is the best way to keep your physical person safe and the only possible means we have of healing the wounds that your soul carries.”

Bilbo smiled at his uncle with gentle affection, “I know, Emelmuindor. I shall miss you so very much after we depart tomorrow. Sometimes, I rather wish that the world were not quite as large as it is. It would have made the journey to Mordor a shade less difficult.”

Elrond chuckled and agreed, “Perhaps a shade.”

“Oh, here,” Bilbo offered the medium-sized bundle in his arms to his uncle, “This is for you.”

Bilbo’s Elven uncle accepted the soft package and deftly unwound the cloth, which was protecting the gift inside of it, in a single, swift motion to expose a tapestry that had been folded ever so carefully. Elrond let it fall open and then gasped in wonder and bittersweet delight as he took in what Bilbo had painstakingly depicted on the shimmering fabric.

It had taken Bilbo two full months to weave, because of both its size and his desire to ensure that it was absolutely perfect before he presented it to his uncle. The tapestry portrayed that which could never again be real – Elrond and his wife, Bilbo’s aunt Celebrían, with their children, Bilbo’s parents, and Bilbo himself in a field of pink verbenas, smiling and carefree. Bilbo had carefully covered the front of the tapestry with a clear polish that would not crack as it dried and had blown a very thin layer of silver dust onto it, giving the scene a hazy quality, as if it were a memory that you could view with your eyes and not just your mind. The border was dark silver with Quenya runes that spoke of family and unyielding love embroidered on it in a lighter shade of the same color.

“Bilbo,” Elrond breathed out, his voice thick in his throat as he spoke, “This is beautiful. Thank you.”

“You’re welcome,” Bilbo replied softly. “I know that the loss of them still affects you greatly during the summer months; I hoped that this might help, a bit.”

“It shall,” Elrond agreed, pulling Bilbo into a warm hug. “And you are right, the summer is when their absence is the hardest to bear – I lost both my wife and my sister during the pinnacle of that season… and then I nearly lost my nephew as well. I cannot tell you how grateful I am that you survived your trials in Mordor, Gwathelion.”

“Because of your tireless efforts,” Bilbo reminded, returning the embrace. “That I lived, despite the thick poison in my lungs and the damage wrought to my soul by the Ring, was because you refused to give up on me, when even the Lady Galadriel feared that I would not survive. You toiled for a solid week without rest to heal me, expending much of your power to do so, Uncle.”

Gandalf and Galadriel had relayed as much, when Bilbo had finally awoken from the unnatural sleep that had claimed him after the Ring had been destroyed. Bilbo could only just remember that choking sleep, the thick black that had done its best to consume him, but what he recalled best about that nightmarish time was the warm light that he clung to, for it made him feel safe and reminded him that he was still loved, and that he had followed back into the realm of life. That light, Bilbo now knew, had been his Elven uncle obstinately refusing to abandon his Hobbit nephew to the clutches of death.

“I would have given it all, had it been necessary,” Elrond insisted seriously, pulling back so that Bilbo could see the resolve writ upon his countenance. Bilbo grinned, his tone as sure as his faith in his favorite uncle, “I know.”

“It truly was that close?” Dwalin’s voice sounded from the doorway, making Bilbo start. He spun around to see Dwalin and Thorin hovering just outside of the room.

Elrond did not react as if he were surprised at all by the sudden presence of Bilbo’s husbands – he probably had known that they were there all along, lurking outside of his private library and listening in on what was supposed to be a private conversation between uncle and nephew – he simply raised an eyebrow at the pair and surreptitiously folded the tapestry over his arm, concealing the image sewn upon it. Bilbo, for his part, had to suppress an exasperated sigh, because he truly had not wanted his husbands to know that the perpetuated fallacy of his death had very nearly not been an erroneous account of those particular events at all. They worried enough about him and as much as Bilbo’s heart and soul sung at the obvious care and concern that they displayed for him, he worried that their overly defensive actions were spurred more by guilt for their mistakes than by anything else.

Bilbo knew that Thorin and Dwalin loved him and that they had missed him terribly, but after that first emotional day of being together again he had started to fear that once their guilt had faded, once their elation at knowing he was alive settled into something more temperate, that they would remember he was the Hobbit whom they had been so unsure about keeping for months, the person whom they had so adamantly wanted to change even after their marriage vows had been uttered. Bilbo could never be a Dwarf, would never value many of the things that Dwarves did, like gold and combat and glory, and once they truly realized that… well, what if they decided that he was not good enough again? What if the proud and suspicious people of Erebor, who already called him Prince Consort with such gladness even in his absence – as Balin had cheerfully reported to him – dismissed him as unworthy because he could not properly relate to them?

As resolute as Bilbo had been when first asked, he now had serious doubts about returning to Erebor. Oh, he still wanted to go – because even the idea of parting from his husbands and brothers and nephews made his soul ache something fierce and wretched – but fear pounded at him incessantly and anxiety gnawed at his heart mercilessly.

It did not help that Thorin and Dwalin had avoided touching him as much as they possibly could over the past week that they had rested in Rivendell. They would hug him and hold him when he asked it of them, but only when he asked and never of their own volition. They refused to kiss him, or sleep with him – innocently or otherwise – and even when they did embrace him, their hands did not wander as they nearly always had before, during the Quest and while they rested in Erebor following Smaug’s very timely demise. They let Bilbo touch them, on their arms and shoulders and backs, as much as he desired to, but they rarely reciprocated and never initiated anything but brief and entirely innocent caresses when they seemed to believe that he needed such from them.

Bilbo’s current misgivings about his place in the Mountain and his husbands’ behavior were, of course, the very subjects that he had wished to converse with his uncle, in the strictest of confidences, about as he hoped that Elrond would provide some measure of reassuring clarity regarding their actions that Bilbo was apparently incapable of perceiving on his own. But he could hardly do so now, not when Dwalin and Thorin had entered the room and were all but hovering over his person.

“It was closer than anyone would have liked,” Elrond tactfully replied a few tense moments later, when it became blatantly obvious that Bilbo was decidedly not going to confirm Dwalin’s all too apprehensive query, would have rather marched back into the heart of Mordor than do anything of the kind, “But Bilbo survived and has recovered well from those wounds. My magic played a part, but his own strength saw to the rest.”

And there it was, the afore mentioned guilt, flashing like lightning across the finely chiseled features of the Dwarrow whom Bilbo loved beyond reason. Sadness lanced through Bilbo’s heart, but he managed to keep it off of his face and hidden from his husbands and uncle with only a little difficulty. He had quite a considerable amount of practice at concealing his true and more unpleasant emotions from others, after all. Hobbits used manners like a mask to obscure what their relatives and neighbors might find disagreeable and Bilbo had been no exception to this rule – what confidence he had gained to bluntly express his feelings and thoughts during the Quest had been stripped away in the aftermath.

“We should have been with you, Khajmel,” Thorin spoke mournfully.

A vision of Thorin and Dwalin shorn and shackled – the prisoners of Orcs – swirled into his mind’s eye. It was but a remnant of a waking dream, one of the many that he had been forced to endure during his journey to Mordor thanks to the thrice-damned and wretched Ring, but the flashing images still horrified him as much now as they had then.

“No,” Bilbo denied emphatically, shaking his head to rid it of the horrible scene. “No, I’m glad you weren’t. That you two, that all of the Company, were safe in Erebor was an immeasurable comfort to me, Fy Alawon. It was one less thing for me to fear as I journeyed South; that Sauron was incapable of harming any of you to punish me for destroying the Ring.”

His husbands, rather unfortunately, did not seem to have been made one whit happier by such a declaration. Perhaps, Bilbo acknowledged, he should refrain from making remarks that even slightly eluded to how frightened he had been while on his own. It would only increase their guilt and that was the last thing that Bilbo wanted.

A soft knock on the open door of the library silenced any reply that Thorin or Dwalin might have had and then an Elf with hair so blonde that it was nearly white glided into the room and inclined her head respectfully, “I beg pardon for my intrusion, my Lord Elrond, but a missive has arrived from Caras Galadhon for Ernil uin Glaur that bears Mithrandir’s mark.”

“Gandalf,” Bilbo murmured, enormously relieved to see the sealed dark green parchment resting on the silver tray in the Elven maiden’s dainty hands. If his Godfather was well enough to write then he could not be too terribly injured.

“Thank you, Vanlanthiriel,” Elrond said as Bilbo accepted the proffered letter eagerly.

“Yes, thank you,” Bilbo agreed, waiting only until the attendant had departed from the room before breaking the letter’s seal and beginning to read.

My Dear Godson,

I can not fully express in a mere letter how glad I was to learn that you are safe and out of Saruman’s tainted reach, for I feared the absolute worst when I discovered his foul plans. I am so grievously sorry for the fate which has befallen the Shire, befallen your gentle people, and regret beyond regret that I was unable to prevent it from happening. The White Council exists to ensure that such things never happen and yet we utterly failed to protect Yavanna’s Light in Arda; I cannot deny that this was almost entirely due to our own collective arrogance and our willful blindness regarding the faults of one of our own. That your people paid the price is a tragedy, a travesty, one that I and the rest of the Council shall grieve for the rest of our lives.

Rest assured, my dear Bilbo, that the fallen Istari shall not remain unpunished for the atrocities which he has committed in his devastating madness. He shall be dealt with, shall be banished from Arda, one way or another, to meet the divine justice of the Valar. I swear it shall be done.

Your uncle, the Lord Elrond, has made known to me and the rest of your kin here, in fair Lothlórien, that your Dwarves have come for you and mean to bear you to the Kingdom of Erebor. If this truly pleases you, then I am pleased as well – I do believe that you will be happiest in Erebor, even if Thorin and Dwalin hardly deserve you. Do inform them, from me, that I can and will turn them into toads, if the need should arise.

May Yavanna ever bless you with love and laughter and Green, dear Bilbo.

Gandalf Greyhame

Post Script: The Lady Galadriel has informed me that I ought to relay my improving health to you. I am perfectly fine and there is no need for you to concern yourself over my person. I have been injured far worse than this, on many occasions.

Bilbo felt himself choking on air in stark incredulity as the final few sentences sunk in and then he thrust the letter toward his uncle unceremoniously, “Read the last bit.”

Elrond took the piece of parchment without question and focused on the bottom of the page, his left eyebrow quirking upward in a combination of disbelief and resigned exasperation. After a long moment, Bilbo’s uncle sighed, “Mithrandir certainly has a way with words.”

“I love him, but sometimes I really do want to hit him over the head with his own staff,” Bilbo muttered. “Honestly, telling someone who is already worried that, ‘I have been injured far worse than this, on many occasions,’ is not at all helpful.”

“Believe me, nephew mine,” Elrond returned the letter to Bilbo, “As tempting as the urge is, it won’t actually help. His skull is simply too thick.”

Thorin snorted in startled amusement at the implied admission, “When?”

“When he marched himself into my home and informed me that he was taking my untrained nephew to face the last of the Great Drakes,” Elrond replied dryly.

Come to think of it, Gandalf had gone to bed early that first night that the Company had been in Rivendell during the Quest, Bilbo recalled, as the Grey Wizard had claimed to be suffering from a minor headache. Bilbo had not thought much of it, at the time, because he had been significantly distracted by his uncle and cousins, whom had tried very, very hard to convince him into not continuing to head eastward with the Dwarves. If the Company had not slipped away like shadows in the night, while Gandalf had kept the White Council busy, then it was very likely that one, if not all four, of Bilbo’s cousins would have chased after him with the intention of dragging him back to the Valley of Imladris.

“I knew how to use a bow,” Bilbo protested. “And I was fairly proficient, even then.”

Elrond shot him an unimpressed look, one that made him feel as if he were once again a wild fauntling with a penchant for getting himself into trouble, “Yes, but you didn’t have one until you got here and by that point you had already encountered Orcs and Wargs and had nearly been eaten alive by three Cave Trolls.”

“He has a natural skill with short-blades, both when it comes to throwin’ knives from a distance and in usin’ daggers in a close-range fight,” Dwalin relayed in Bilbo’s defense, pride ringing in his voice and clearly visible in his countenance. “And his sword work was improvin’, in leaps and bounds, durin’ each trainin’ session that we had on our way to Erebor. Faster than most of the Dwarves that I trained back in Ered Luin and they had years to advance their skills.”

Having pride directed toward him was, Bilbo supposed, much better than the leaden guilt. At least it was not the apathy or the disdain for his person that he secretly dreaded might come. Bilbo was not overly fond of weapons or fighting, quite the opposite in fact, but he knew that as long as he pushed himself to become stronger and faster – less helpless and weak and like a grocer – then he could, at the bare minimum, retain a modicum of his husbands’ respect as their guilt dwindled, day by day. Being esteemed as a capable warrior would be better than them thinking him worth nothing at all.

So, Bilbo did not hesitate in deciding to say, “I’ve hardly mastered any of those skills, though, or any of the others that you wanted me to learn. You said that you wanted to establish regular training sessions once the Mountain was secure. If you’re both still willing to teach me, I enjoyed learning from you.”

Dwalin and Thorin looked immediately pleased by the request, proving that Bilbo had made the right choice in asking. He had not lied to his Melodies, not really. As much as he despised battle, he did understand why having the ability to defend oneself and those whom one loved was such an obligatory and vital skill to hone if one planned to traverse the Wildes of Arda – and he had derived some satisfaction from knowing that he could protect his Kindred, if need be, because of the instruction that he had received during the Quest. He had discovered that the exercise which naturally came with the training was an excellent way to relieve stress and irritation, as well. Plus, having his husbands’ undivided and physical attention was something that he craved rather desperately and he was willing to go to extreme measures to get it.

“Absolutely, Laslel,” Dwalin replied eagerly, his arm and shoulder muscles flexing ever so slightly. It was, Bilbo knew, an inadvertent indication of his excitement for such a scheme; one of the many things that Bilbo had missed so much about his Melodies.

Thorin’s eyes sparkled, as if starlight was reflecting off of twin sapphires, “We can go back down to the training fields now, if you like. There’s time enough until Luncheon for us to run sword drills with you.”

And if Bilbo wished that his husband had been speaking more in the figurative sense than in the literal, well, he kept it to himself and just nodded, managing a small smile, “I would like that very much.”

#dwagginshield #barufel #my writing #bilbo baggins #thorin oakenshield #dwalin #families of choice

[bulletandsophia]

Some more thoughts, meta, and a little bit of criticism after watching the leaked GoT episode 6. Spoilers again under the cut.

First of all, I love it simply because the North finally takes the limelight. While it’s finally the fruition of (in my opinion) the not-so-thought-out wight hunt, episode 6 brought the intrigue GoT is just known for since it opened up four plot lines I’m sure we should watch out in the next episode and in the next season:

1. Issue on succession/children

2. Sansa and Arya playing games possibly on each other.

3. Jon and D*ny’s relationship

4. Honor/heroism

Children and succession have been brought up one too many times this episode. First was during Tyrion and D*ny’s conversation about “making sure the wheel stays broken”, second was during Jorah and Jon’s scene of passing on Longclaw’s to Jon’s children, third was Tormund dreaming of having kids with Brienne and in which he believes, could take on the world; and lastly, during Jon and D*ny’s scene on the boat where she said her dragons are the only children she’ll ever have.

Note that D*ny and Jon are involved in this flow of thought and I can see why most are predicting a Targbaby coming our way next season after the boatbang. That’s a possibility at this point. Not to mention, as we’ve found out previously, Cersei’s pregnant too and the seemingly strong affinity of Gendry as Robert’s son most likely assumes that he’d like to continue or at least uphold the Baratheon legacy too.

So at this point in time, all Houses are definitely thinking of heirs or continuity, what with the death of House Martell and House Tyrell.

But curiously though, this is happening for all except for one: House Stark.

Since Bran has outright declined the title of Lord of Winterfell, this affirms Sansa’s position as Lady of Winterfell. And if we follow this certain plot flow for the Great Houses, how then can Sansa, a female leader and would likely take her future’s husband name once she marries (i.e. Lady Lannister, Lady Bolton), could continue on the legacy? With Rickon and Uncle Benjen dead, technically, there’s no other man that carries the Stark name. So for House Stark to continue, we all know of these three possible routes: either she makes her future husband take her name, she legitimizes Jon (still unsure if Robb’s will will make an appearance again), or do both. Any which way, House Stark gets to have a move on.

Importantly, this “succession” thought flow as it opens the Targbaby possibility and the death of the Stark name, is another heavy factor Jon has to face in the future and this I believe so fully. As the audience, we know he is both Stark and Targaryen. But until he finds out about this, Jon is still in the safety of being a bastard (Snow). And with his kingship as something he does not want in the first place, succession is basically not his priority for as I see it, he uses his power for the purpose of defeating the WW. So it would be very interesting to see how this would play out for him once the truth is finally revealed. Because more than the crown, this is Jon choosing his identity. And if the revelation of R+L=J next season prevails, then let’s not forget too of how then would D feel about it? Would we see Targbowl? Would D make Jon her heir instead? What about the North? Would Jon leave Winterfell to rule Westeros with D? Would Jon return to Sansa carrying his Targbaby the same way Ned carried him back for Cat to see?

With these loopholes consistently presenting themselves and all the more while J and D get together, I am pretty sure it’s not going to be pretty smooth sailing for them. 

Going into this episode, I also already knew about the heartaches of some of my fellow Jonsa shippers.There were indeed tender J/D moments and D has finally seen Jon’s wounds to prove Davos’ “stab to the heart” speech. But I’m still sticking to my previous meta that while J/D is happening, it is happening based on the superficial, soap opera-ish notions and tones. These are two people situated in a life-and-death, fantastical scenario that leaves their emotions running high. Again, desperation can make or break a man. 

There was an attempt too in the boat scene to create angst as D pulls her hand away from Jon’s hold. This denial has done its work because interestingly, Tyrion has pointed out this attraction between the two earlier in the episode as D*ny complained about the “hero-tendencies” of people like Drogo, Jorah, Daario and “this Jon Snow” and in which Tyrion emphasized: “All these men has fallen in love with you.” D denies and excludes Jon in that list but Tyrion ignores this. So almost into a confirmation, J/D is happening. But again like I said before, not without the bitterness. As I see here, D is finally (or seemingly) humbled by Jon and of the truth he has been saying all along. Probably, this is her changing her demeanor to fall into Jon’s principles as her attraction to him is far more evident than his. I also would not deny Jon that moment of tenderness because finally, he succeeded in catching a wight and convincing D. He also empathizes with the death of her dragon (another reason for D’s vulnerability on this scene) and into which he blames himself because of said (idiotic) wight-hunt. But on this scene, what truly was the most surprising part is Jon giving away the North (”I’d bend the knee but…”–gesturing to his bedridden form) not when D has first agreed to help him. This and just after we saw him deliberately said in the previous episode, “I am King.”

So is Jon doing a Robb? Helplessly and haplessly falling in love with D? Is Jon not caring about honor anymore, especially after Tormund reiterates the number of people that died because of Mance’s pride, almost echoing Tyrion’s first pleas to Jon to bend the knee at Dragonstone? Is this Jon’s big gesture and character shift? Another great point to make here, for the sake of the undercover Jon theory, is that during LF and Sansa’s conversation in this episode, she mentioned about not having any contact with Jon for weeks. With how fast Gendry and Davos were able to send that raven to Dragonstone, curious that they never send word to the North, Jon’s very own kingdom. 

So, I believe it is safe to assume no one in Winterfell knows what he is up to. They truly are waiting, just like Ghost. And the big question now is, why should it be so?

But going outside the formalistic view here, is this simply the writers’ ploy to finally get this J/D plot running to finally make way for something bigger and unpredictable in the next season? Targbowl, Starkcest? It pretty much makes a more compelling storyline compared to this CGI-filled, action-packed, and quite stagnantly plotted season 7. Remember, this is GoT. They time and again flip, break, and destroy plots so cookie-cut and so blatantly displayed. At this point in the story, J/D is the one blatantly displayed. And with this evident (and quite forced) “romance”, it’s very easy to forget the previous episodes where it says to us otherwise (angry Jon, cloakcest, unnecessary hand-holding, multiple parallels, Sansa giving Jon purpose after his resurrection!, “The North is Yours.”, “Jon is king.”, etc.) All very subtle, all ingeniously scattered since season 6. 

Again, I’ll stick with my meta that J/D is the Rhaegar and Lyanna to Jon and Sansa’s Ned and Cat. J/D is the fulfillment of Jon’s prophecy while Jonsa is the embodiment of Jon’s dreams–both of which are seemingly sailing at the same time.

Also, more than anything else, it’s Sansa and Arya’s plot lines back in Winterfell that worries me the most. Both are very much unpredictable with where they want to go. Arya, with all the strength and bravery that she has, still carries with her the issues of past conflicts and mistrusts. Her anger is deeply rooted in Season 1 conflicts that triggers Sansa to also go back to her Season 1 insecurities. I’ve already read some criticisms here and I can see where the arguments and the slight anger is coming from. While this Starkbowl makes a painful scenario, this ties up the loose ends of their relationship during the time they parted. Sansa puts it nicely, “I don’t know her [anymore].” the same way Arya does not know Sansa any longer. Whether the sisters will work together or against each other, is something we have to see in the next episode. I only wish BRAN gets to be involved in this too. But keeping my fingers crossed that Sansa’s Ned speech is her and Arya fighting together, as a pack. 

~~One episode left guys and GoT is running this in full steam. Some of the showrunners’ decisions are definitely questionable for I believe Ned, Robb, Cat, Oberyn, and Hodor did not die for some piece of sub-par writing–and only to benefit Jon and D’s narrative. While I believe they will have that final battle, I surely hope the device to make that happen is not at the expense and deterioration of the other great, great characters already overshadowed by these prophetical Targs. I feel so sad by the way about how Tyrion is basically just on the sidelines now. With the rushed pacing of season 7, I can’t help but feel that this season is only the filler season to establish the Targ conflict and then for a much more intense season 8, where subplots and characters can finally come together, and where loyalties and drastic decisions has to be fulfilled. 

I’m keeping my faith that GoT won’t (continue) to lose its genius after this season. And Jonsa is endgame. :)

#jonsa #jon x sansa #meta #spoilers #jon and sansa #tinfoil #actuallyjonsa

[lesmotsincompris]

Thoughts on GoT S07E03

This time I didn’t take notes during the episode because I watched it on TV, so I forgot half the stuff I wanted to say.

It’s amazing how D&D can have so much going on—Jon and Dany meeting for the first time, Bran and Sansa reunion, the fall of Highgarden and House Tyrell, Dany losing so much of her strength, lots of revenge, lots of attacks...—and still make me feel so little.

To be more specific:

Dragonstone

Jon reached Dragonstone awfully fast, but I can assume a long time has passed between the end of last episode and the beginning of this one. What I have more trouble explaining is why Jon decided to go just with Davos (Jon says he must go himself because Daenerys is a queen and anything less than a king won’t do, but a king alone is not very impressive, is it?), how they traveled so far, or how they managed to do it on their own.

Daenerys and Jon meeting for the first time was supposed to be the highlight of the episode and one of the highlights of the season (if not the story as a whole), but the moment was awfully flat. It doesn’t help that I don’t like the show version of both characters, or that Emilia and Kit are among the least talented actors in the cast.

There was a lot of title dropping, praise for deeds or skills we barely saw on screen, and inaccurate westerosi history in a scene that lasted several minutes too long. I still don’t understand what makes Jon King in the North other than the writers really, really wanted it to happen, so there’s that too.

Jon showing up with no proof that the icepocalypse is real is beyond stupid. Why would anyone believe him? Was he counting on Tyrion to buy his story? Was that the best he could say to paint an accurate picture of the situation? On the other hand, the audience knows Jon is telling the truth, so all this talk of ‘bending the knee’ and Dany’s general entitlement were silly and irritating. On the other-other hand (back to my first hand?), if Jon truly cares about the war against the White Walkers instead of being king, he could just bend the fucking knee and get on with this already. How can I enjoy this scene when everyone on it sounds so dumb and childish?

It’s great to see Dany acknowledging that she was raped or that her father was mad, but this is quite far from ‘my sun and stars’ or ‘the usurper’ narratives that we’ve been fed so far, and we should have seen this development happening in our screens. It’s especially odd to have her so comfortable with the idea that her father was mad, since: a) show!Dany has her fair share of pyromaniac moments as well; b) if she admits Aerys was a terrible king, she admits Robert’s Rebellion was necessary. If she validates Robert’s Rebellion, doesn’t that mean she no longer has a claim to the throne? How does she fit all this in her head? We just don’t know.

Tyrion and Davos made most of the relevant talking and it’s great to see Tyrion doing something smart again. Still, I hate how he’s always the Voice of Reason™ for Dany, this time changing her mind about Jon. To be fair, my issue is not this scene in particular, but the pattern of giving Tyrion all the relevant decisions. Dany is the queen, we need to see her ability to rule and we need to believe that she deserves her position. If she’s shown depending on Tyrion for every move or being easily influenced by his ideas (no matter how stupid they are), her position feels unearned. At least we got that moment when she calls him out on his bullshit for his ‘wise words’, that was actually fun to watch and reminded me of book!Dany.

Varys was also acting more like his book self, which only proves that cutting Aegon VI is hurting the story more than expected. Not only it gives Varys split personality but also hurts Dany’s plot, King’s Landing, the Stormlands and the Reach… It’s interesting, I always assumed Aegon could be more or less cut without great losses and now I see that excluding him from the story demands more care than that.

People praising Sansa’s wits is a rare sight in the show (has this actually happened before?), but this time both Tyrion and Jon did it. The sad implication behind the idea that Sansa ‘became’ smart is that she ‘had’ to suffer all that bullshit in season five in order to develop this intelligence. D&D fail to see that Sansa has always been smart.

Melisandre’s scene was almost ‘now that I did everything the plot needed from me I can fade away so the writers don’t have to come up with a something for me to do’. It could be worse, she could be trapped in a stupid greyscale plot.

Dany says that Jon lost two brothers… How does she know that Bran is alive? I’m convinced there’s something like a Westeros Daily twitter account and all characters read it constantly, and that’s how they get information that would otherwise be impossible for them to obtain.

How did Jon expected to mine and transport all that dragonglass if there’s just him and Davos? Idiot.

Davos and Jon saying that Dany could have attacked King’s Landing only highlights the fact that she should have done exactly that. I am but a young girl and know little of the ways of war, but Tyrion’s plan falls apart with little examination. Attacking King’s Landing via dragon means Dany can more or less direct the attacks to military targets, thus sparing a lot of innocent lives. Besieging King’s Landing, on the other hand, will bring starvation, higher criminality, and other problems that will affect the smallfolk long before they affect Cersei and co. There’s also Casterly Rock: I understand the value of conquering the Lannister seat, but it’s not worth splitting Dany’s forces in half, especially when they don’t do the most basic research about current Lannister strategy.

Of course, all that implies writers who actually care and are capable of writing meaningful conflict. We have D&D instead, so the only reason why Dany doesn’t attack King’s Landing is to save the confrontation with Cersei for whatever episode replaces the 9th episode this season.

Winterfell

I’m not gonna lie, I enjoyed seeing Sansa being a good ruler and using her skills. This is the first time in ages that show!Sansa does anything resembling book!Sansa.

What I don’t understand is why Littlefinger keeps following her around. I barely see a reason for him to be in Winterfell, let alone this. The platitudes he says in the show never made a lot of sense, but sound even worse after D&D destroyed his image as a skilled political player with the season five fiasco.

I actually enjoyed seeing Sansa and Bran reuniting. The show made me feel things! Positive things! With book characters that I like! Omg, what am I watching?

Oh, no, wait, I’m watching Game of Thrones. Not only Isaac Hempstead-Wright wasn’t allowed to emote, the writers had Bran reminding Sansa of her wedding to Ramsay in the cruelest, most uncomfortable way. Considering there were tons of other useful information Bran could have shared, making us revisit this scene in particular feels like a middle finger to critics of the Sansa Marriage Strike.

They also tried to hand-wave the whole Winterfell inheritance problem, with… zero success, honestly. For starters, Sansa says that Bran is ‘the Lord of Winterfell’, not the ‘King in the North’, as if the latter was not disputable. Except it totally is? Jon wouldn’t be an option if the Northern Lords knew Bran was alive. Plus Winterfell is the seat for the King in the North, so being Lord of Winterfell while there’s a King in North means you rule squat. It doesn’t matter; Bran dismissed whatever inheritance based on the fact that he’s the Three Eyed Exposition Robot now. As if that meant anything, you know?

I still don’t understand how Bran went from ‘having visions through weirwood trees’ to ‘divine omniscience’. Have they ever explained this?

Oldtown

I said last week that Jorah outlived his narrative purpose, but that’s especially noticeable with the greyscale plot. If he dies, then eh. If he survives, then eh, so what? Is he gonna go back to Dany? What can he offer her that any of her several advisors can’t? Thankfully he’s not gonna get the girl, so the best he can hope for is dying a heroic death. But, you know, that could have been accomplished without all the screentime we lost with this subplot.

King’s Landing

Where to start?

Why is the smallfolk cheering Euron? Do people actually buy that the septsplosion was an accident? Didn’t they establish in S07E02 that everybody knew it was Cersei? Why isn’t everybody rioting against her? The smallfolk can’t be that stupid, or they would be writing HBO shows.

I’m glad that in three years at least one person reacted to the fact that a zombified Gregor Clegane is serving Cersei Lannister. Thank you, Indira Varma, for being too good for this shit and remind us of the better days this show had.

Carol the tiger mom and the uber villainous Cheryl merged together in a single scene to give us Ellaria and Bad Pussy’s torture. Now there’s only Cersei, the villainous tiger mom. I wish I could care about Bad Pussy Snake dying, but this means less Dorne on screen, so hooray?

(honestly, I’m barely certain Bad Pussy Snake is supposed to be Tyene. She could be Brown Ben Plumm for all I know)

Of all the plot threads in all towns in the world… they bring back Tycho Nestoris. And a Braavos that profits from slave trade! D&D are not just showing the middle finger to book readers, they’re pulling their pants down and making a dickopter on book readers’ faces.

Speaking of dicks, do you think D&D have learned what it means to have sex with a person after they say ‘no’?

Casterly Rock

Is Casterly Rock an important military target? If you say ‘yes’, I must wonder why the Lannisters were willing to lose it so they could attack Highgarden. If you say ‘no’, it means Tyrion lost Daenerys half her fleet and a good chunk of her fiercest warriors out of sheer stupidity. It’s a win-win situation for show detractors!

How did Greyworm’s fleet arrived at Casterly Rock and never crossed paths with Euron’s fleet? How did Euron’s fleet sneak attacked them and nobody saw it? Shouldn’t the Unsullied be more disciplined in a fight? Why would you imply the current generation of Lannisters built Casterly Rock when the book explanation for Tyrion and the sewers works so much better?

(was that special lady tunnel an allusion to the book tunnel connecting the Tower of the Hand and Chataya’s? I know I sound crazy, but D&D have the weirdest ways of ‘adapting’ the source material)

I like the concept of this attack that never was, but factors like Tyrion’s narration, the unimpressive look and resistance of Casterly Rock, or Euron’s teleporting fleet make the execution far less effective for me.

Euron is Ramsay 2.0, now with a rockstar look and even less personality!

Highgarden

That was a crazy fast travel, huh?

Diana Rigg is a great actor, but I confess I lost track of this dialogue a lot. Like, I wrote my main impressions yesterday one hour after the episode and I could barely remember what they were talking about.

I just remember Olenna trashing Cersei for being the worst, but Olenna killed a child (a monstrous child, but a child still) and framed two innocent people for it, one of them another child, and she shows no remorse. So you know what, fuck Olenna.

Extra notes

Honeypot: Euron’s fleet can teleport because he built it with magic trees that teleported to the Iron Islands after Yara stole their original fleet. So the wood has magical teleporting properties, allowing the whole fleet to teleport too. Ta-daaam!

No, really, the teleporting (and not just Euron’s) was wild this time. They clearly don’t give two fucks about consistency anymore.

The main problem with the show at this point is that we can’t ignore what came before. Dany’s or Jon’s speech feels flat because Dany and Jon have been remarkably incompetent at their leadership roles. Ellaria and Tyene’s demise doesn’t touch us because Ellaria and Tyene are murderous jerks and little else. And so on.

There’s so much that is just vomited onto the screen, with little to no care. Look at Euron or the non-battle at Highgarden. D&D cheat in favor of their villains, their ‘shocking twists’, their fanservice moments, or that aberration they call plot. They care less and less, and we have to stop rewarding them for shitting in the glorious profession of writing.

The nicest thing about this episode was trying to explain the concept of hate-watching to my parents and see my mom recognizing the name “Game of Thwo” (my parents don’t speak English in the slightest, so it wasn’t that bad).

#antigot #anti got #got criticism #personal: watching things