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#and during holidays i lay in bed instead of doing things because i feel too tired to want to do things

mosquito-queen · 11 months

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there are a few things in yelena’s hotel room that are decidedly not holiday inn decor: her rings on the bedside table and a small porcelain rabbit in the window sill. the rings were understandable… but a bunny?

kate spies the ceramic interloper the morning after yelena had tucked her so sweetly into the hotel scratchy blankets, slung her arm around kate’s torso and spooned her. a black widow had spooned her.

and then she said something in russian so thick (and so hot) that kate had no chance of remembering the sounds to even attempt google translate at a later date. instead, all of kate’s brainpower was directed to being impossibly closer to the woman cuddling her.

and that had led to kate turning around so quickly that she whacked her head into yelena’s and between the stuttering of an apology and russian curses someone had kissed someone until the curses went from derogatory to praise and now kate’s muscles ached in a way adjacent to their usual fights. but decidedly in a better way.

now, she was laying on her stomach, head turned towards the window and arms cradling the pillow underneath her. the blanket was pulled up to cut across her shoulder blades. it wasn’t the blanket she had initially been wrapped up in - yelena had definitely stolen that at some point during the night. now all kate has is a sheet.

yelena’s breath is hot on kate’s shoulder, and she feels her forehead pressed against her upper arm. her heart softens. she bets yelena looks like an angel. she’s about to turn her head to find out, but something out of place catches her attention. she squints at the windowsill, spies the offending figurine lit by the morning sun.

yelena is shuffling closer to her in the bed, wrapping her arm sleepily around kate and pulling herself closer. kate is still trying to puzzle out why a deadly russian assassin would have such a tiny rabbit.

there’s a hesitant kiss pressed against her arm, yelena’s eyelashes fluttering against her skin, and in a groggy voice she says, “kate, i can hear you thinking.”

kate still doesn’t turn to look at her, forgets that yelena isn’t resilient to doubt, but is reminded as soon as the warmth starts to be pulled away. kate catches her arm, tucks it back around her, feels yelena slowly sink back into her.

“did the rabbit come with the room?”

“oh.” yelena is running her fingers over kate’s opposite arm, and shifts so she can rest her head on kate’s back to look at the window, “you do not recognize him?”

“should i? is it the easter bunny?”

yelena makes a dissatisfied noise and squeezes kate’s arm. the archer is grinning into the pillows at the frustration, “no. it is not the easter bunny,” she mimics kate’s voice, “he is from your movie, bambi.”

“yelena, americans are not born with disney movies in our blood.”

now yelena does push away from her, absolute shock spluttering across her face. kate turns with her, pulls the sheet up to keep some kind of decency, she laughs at yelena and gives in, “yes, yes, i know of bambi.”

“but you haven’t seen it?”

“no.” kate’s answer is short, her eyes tracking over yelena. getting caught up in the way her hair haloes her face, the way her eyes crinkle, the softness of her mouth, the way yelena is propped up that makes the duvet cover fall crooked and barely cover her. it’s too early for kate to practice discipline. her eyes wander.

yelena is either ignoring her gaze or is way too invested in bambi-gate, “kate bishop. you are an archer. you should have to watch bambi before you get to hunt.”

the memory yelena is referencing pulls kate slightly back to earth, and she groans, “i only went hunting once! once! and never again!”

this time yelena is grinning, “only because you did not get a trophy.”

kate reaches out, grabs the twist of blanket pooling around yelena and drags her down, “stop deflecting, and tell me about your rabbit.”

“you’re more awake in the morning than i anticipated.”

kate has yelena’s hand tangled in one of hers now, brings it up to mouth and bites at the fingers, “i’m full of surprises. and so are you. let’s hear it.”

yelena settles into kate’s side, toying with her hand, “mama gave it to me.”

kate sometimes knows when to be quiet, lets yelena continue playing with her hand, waits.

“thumper was my favorite. mama called me bunny, said rabbits were lucky. that i was lucky.” her voice is growing sadder, “natasha always stole him. she put him up on high shelves - places i couldn’t reach,” she whispers cyka in the most loving tone, “she stole him the night we left, had him in her pocket. he is lucky - everyone made it out that night.”

there’s a hard swallow, kate thinks maybe yelena could cry. she’s stopped playing with her hand, so kate begins tracing soothing patterns over yelena’s arm.

“she kept him the entire time we were separate. i don’t know how, but she never lost him… after.. after she -“ a pause, “clint had him. gave him back to me, he said during the blip natasha kept him above doors, in windows, near thresholds,” she clicks her tongue, “always superstitious…”

she trails off, and they sit in the silence with kate still tracing patterns.

“i had him the night on the roof. when i met you.”

#nostalgia is yelena’s middle name #yelena has a little bunny figurine and i like to think maybe kate has a stuffed animal that her dad gave her she will never part with #bishova #katelena #kate x yelena #kate bishop #yelena belova

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beaker1636 · 6 months

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I'll Be Home For Christmas - Ricky Angst

AN: I am really proud of how this one came out, I genuinely love it! Thank you for the request @tearfallpixie ! I hope you enjoy it as much as I do!

“What do you mean that you won’t be here in time for Christmas?! This is why I didn’t want you to book a flight home on fucking Christmas eve?”

You want to yell, to scream out your frustration and grief towards your boyfriend, who is telling you yet again that he is missing something important to you but instead you find yourself getting quieter, almost in a whisper as you fight back your tears from his news.

“You-you promised me that you would be home for Christmas after having to miss our anniversary, my birthday, Halloween, and Thanksgiving. Rick, you fucking promised me,” you mumble, lip trembling as you try to keep your tears back.

“I know I did baby, we’re all currently trying to figure out how to get home. It’s not our fault that the flight was canceled, it just happens unfortunately. In fact Chris is currently fighting with someone trying to figure out what the fuck we can all do to get home. Ryan, Vin, Chris and I were all booked on this flight and are stuck here. I know I promised you to be back for your favorite holiday, I’m so fucking sorry and wish I could do more right now,” you can hear the remorse and frustration in his voice, that he was just as upset as you are.

You let out a sigh before responding, “It’s part of being with you, I have to accept that, I am working on accepting that, but it’s hard Rick it is really hard.”

“I know baby, I know. At least we are taking time off after the holidays for our next album so I will be home for a while,” he says, sounding sad as well which just makes you feel worse.

“Yeah, I hope you make it home soon. Rick, I’ve got to go, mom is calling me,” you say softly. “I love you.”

“I love you too baby, I’ll keep you updated,” he answers before hanging up.

Your mother isn't really calling, you just need to end the call before you say something that you will regret during your emotions at the time. You have to take some time to think about what is going on in your mind before you speak about it, not wanting to take your frustrations out on your boyfriend.

You make your way to your bed, laying down on his side before you give in, letting your tears finally escape your eyes as a couple sobs escape as it all finally hits you. Grief from missing him so much the last couple months Anger because he is missing another important thing. Anger because he promised you and broke it. Frustration from spending your favorite holiday alone. But most important, and probably the hardest thing is the loneliness that you feel.

Your anger winds up winning as everything runs through your head, angry at yourself for trusting his words when he has failed you before. And angry at yourself because he failed at keeping his promise.

You groan in annoyance, getting up and finding yourself in your living room. Glaring at all the decorations that are mocking you, at the tree you had to decorate yourself this year. You let out a growl before you begin ripping all of the ornaments off the tree, crying and frustrated. Letting a couple break as you drop them while throwing them in a bag so you can be rid of the thing. When that is done you tear the tree back down, taking it and the ornaments back down into the basement. You wind up taking everything down in a fury, pissed off and annoyed and hurt. So fucking hurt, you debated going home with your family but he fucking promised you.

You thought taking everything down would make you feel better, because then you wouldn’t have to sit and look at them when you know you won’t enjoy your Christmas now.. But instead it has made everything feel more real, breaking your heart even more as you sit on the floor where your tree once stood bawling, questioning if your love for Rick will always be enough to get you through the loneliness and heartbreak that you feel so deep.

Meanwhile

Chris walks back to the group, looking a little less pissed off than he was when he went up to the poor lady working the desk, but also frustrated.

“Okay, I got somewhere with her, we may still have a chance at getting home. The airline has a flight to Philadelphia that leaves in 6 hours out of an airport that is a 4 hour drive away and she was able to get the four of us on it. So if we can get a rental car, drive to the other airport in time, take the flight we would land in Philly at about 2 in the morning and would all get home around 430 if we can get someone to meet us at that airport to drive us home. So let’s all start calling all the rental car places around here and see if we can find one last minute on a holiday and make this happen,” Chris says, giving a hopeful smile to his bandmates and friends.

Rick lets out a sigh, praying to a god he doesn’t believe in that they can somehow make this happen and get home for Christmas before pulling out his phone and starting to make calls.

They have no luck and now 15 minutes later Ryan is calling the last place, all feeling defeated and awful when he finally has a breakthrough.

“I’ve got one, it’s a car so we will be cramped with all of us and our luggage but it’s better than nothing. They are holding it for me so let’s get a taxi and get there before its too late,” he exclaims, getting up from his seat.

Everyone cheers, thankful that they finally found something that will work, hoping everything goes as planned and despite the fact they’ll all be exhausted they will finally be on their way. Eventually getting to the rental place and now on their way, Ryan drives.

Everyone’s moods have lifted at the prospect that they may have pulled this off and be home in time to be with their families.

While sitting in the car headed towards the new airport Rick’s mind wanders towards you, he tried calling you but you didn’t answer him. He hopes that you are alright, able to hear you trembling when you speak and it really hurts him to know that you were hurting, especially when he feels like it is all his fault. But the part that killed him the most, that broke his own heart was when you said that it was part of being with him, that you have to accept that. He honestly hates that he puts you through that, it is hard on him but he knows it is worse on you because you are stuck at home alone when he is off. You had moved away from your family for him, so you are truly alone and he feels awful that he might not even be there for you at the holidays. He would do anything if he knew he could erase all your pain and grief, but he knows he can’t.

He hopes that you aren’t taking it too badly, that you will be happy when he surprises you in the morning. He also selfishly hopes that you are sleeping when he arrives home, that you will wake up and find him in your bed and get the gift he knows that you want the most this year, himself.

Back To You

You find yourself sitting on the couch, feeling a little numb as you continue to look around the room at the emptiness. You and Rick should be getting home from the airport about now and instead you are sitting here, waiting for him to arrive but knowing he probably won’t tonight, which brings you back to your sorrow.

You had things all planned for tomorrow, knowing he would be tired and sleep in, you planned to make a big breakfast for him in bed with all his favorites, but not until later in the day. The two of you would have a lazy day, watching movies curled up together before enjoying a nice dinner. You had already picked up both his and your favorite Christmas movie from the store, had bought everything, hell you even got some new lingerie for that night once the two of you were relaxed and ready to ahem spend time together. You had everything figured out for a nice holiday and now you are alone.

Your mother even begged you to come home for the holiday and you said no because you wanted a nice time with Rick, being his first day home from tour and now you wasted what could be a nice trip home.

You get a call from him but you don’t answer it, given the time you figure it is bad and that you’ll be disappointed all over again, plus you just don’t want to for a moment, needing this time to figure out what you want.

You finally give up, deciding that you want to go to bed and forget about everything. You can deal with this tomorrow, maybe if you are lucky he will be home tomorrow night and it won’t be a complete waste of the day.

The Next Morning

Rick finally arrives home around 5 in the morning, thanks to Vinny's mom who spent her night picking them up from the airport and giving everyone a ride to their houses. He makes sure to give her a smile and huge hug as thanks before grabbing his bag and making his way up the walkway. He lets out a huff, before trying his hardest to unlock the door quietly so that he doesn’t wake you up. He stops in his tracks when he notices that there is no tree up, no decorations anymore, and he knows how much time you spent putting everything up. You facetimed him the entire time to try and make him still feel like he had a part in it with you. He sighs in disappointment before making his way into the bedroom to be with you.

His heart breaks when he sees you sleeping on his side of the bed, holding his pillow to your chest. He can tell that you were crying, your eyes slightly red and puffy in your sleep. He shuffles out of his jeans and shirt, quietly sliding on a pair of sweatpants to sleep in before laying down behind you and wrapping his arm around you, smiling when you instinctively roll over and nuzzle your face in his neck but not waking up.

When you wake up around 9 you are confused at first, you can tell someone is holding you before you even open your eyes. You shoot up, concerned that someone has broken in, or who knows what but then you notice it is Rick and can’t help the excited squeal that escapes your mouth.

You can’t believe he made it on time, he told you he wouldn’t and you thought you would be alone. You just watch him sleep for a while, not wanting to move and risk waking him up because you know he had to have arrived late. But also because you can’t believe that he is currently home, in bed with you.

He stirs after a while, slowly stretching before opening his eyes and looking at you where you lay curled up in his side. Rather than speaking he moves some of your hair, which is a mess from sleeping, out of your face before leaning in and giving you a soft kiss, both of you lingering in the kiss, not wanting to separate after finally seeing you for the first time in a long time before he finally sleepily pulls away with a smile.

“Merry Christmas Y/N,” he says quietly, neither of you moving nor having the desire to. He just gave you your favorite Christmas gift, himself, and you couldn’t be happier to be laying here with him, having a lazy morning. It may not have been the big breakfast and everything you had originally planned but this? This is better.

#motionless in white #fanfiction #bree sucks at fanfiction #motionless in white imagine #miw #miw band #ricky olson x reader #ricky olson imagine #ricky olson fanfic #ricky horror fanfiction #ricky horror imagine #ricky olson fanfiction #ricky horror olson #ricky olson angst #ricky olson fluff

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prepare4trouble · 2 years

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Very strange dream I had last night. Writing it up for myself, feel free to ignore.

I had the absolute weirdest dream of my life last night. I was just laying on my bed writing fanfic and minding my own business, then I got up to do something and fell flat on my face. After a moment of confusion, I realised that is was because my left leg was gone. Just totally not there, from about mig thigh. I had no memory of why this was, and I was convinced it had been there earlier that day, though since there was no pain and no wound or bandages or anything, I did start to waver slightly in my certainty.

Being me though, rather than mention this to anybody I decided to not make any kind of a fuss, and just carried on as normal. The strange thing was, nobody else seemed to notice either. So there I was getting around the house by hopping and holding on to stuff, and not in single person asked wtf. I concluded that it must have always been like that. Or at least been like that for long enough that it wasn’t remarkable at all. As in, for more than an hour or so. The trouble was, I remembered differently and I really wanted to know what was supposed to have happened. But I couldn’t ask anyone, because that would let on that something was wrong.

I concluded that I had somehow slipped into a different reality, and figured I would just have to get on with it. It turned out I had a prosthetic too, but I didn’t know how to put it in and I couldn’t ask without giving myself away. I also found crutches, so I used those instead of hopping, which was much more efficient. Everything else seemed the same in this new reality. I was writing the same fic, we were still planning the holiday we’re going on next week. I vaguely wondered whether I might find some old news article about what had happened if I googled myself, but I never got around to it.

At one point during dream, I decided to pop to Boots, which I did by hitching a ride with my mum - I still had my car, but I had no idea how to drive it. I guess maybe in that reality it was an automatic? But I never got around to checking. Anyway, I spent a chunk of time wandering around the shop picking up various things I needed, paid for them, then got back in the car. I reached for the bag, and it had vanished too.

It was at that point that I decided to have a massive tantrum about it. Because there we were in the car outside the shop and the things I’d bought if my holiday had disappeared, and my family was telling me I was crazy and I’d never bought them in the first place. That was exactly why I’d never mentioned the leg thing to them, because I’d known they would react like that. My mum drove us home, and then the dream took a very random turn because for some reason decided to go the wrong way down a one way street at the very moment a bunch of royal family people decided to drive the right way down it, and my mum made them all back up so she could get out.

I woke up around that time, and was strangely surprised to see my left leg intact.

It’s unusual for me to remember my dreams, and definitely unusual for them to be as vivid and real-feeling as this one, so I’m recording it.

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era-story-writer · 1 year

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ERA - CH.1 PT.2 - The Norms Of A Childs Rountine

Due to the incident with the dome that happened a good 24 years ago security measures were taken. Familiars now will only be able to visit family during holidays or in case of family emergencies. As for witches they will no longer be able to ride the Fauna and Flora train station after 5:30pm. Anyone seen around these hours will be reported or shot on sight. This goes for both familiars, witches, and warlocks.

There were protests at first, one blaming the other but they thought that maybe this was for the best. After all this ment one didn’t have to see the other as often anymore. Right?

This was the question that eight year old Amani Tempis would later in life find out. For now he layed in his bed pretending to be sick so he wouldn’t have to attend school.

“Amani, are you ready to go yet?! We don’t have all day!” Styx as always would be the one yelling his short temper matched his ability perfectly. Amani sometimes wondered if his ability had something to do with his fucked personality but then quickly dismissed the thought because if that were true then his father would be an asshole.

“Let's just leave already! If we don’t we’ll be late because he's throwing a hissy fit again. Amani didn’t need a reminder of how often he did this. Maybe if they didn’t screw with him so often this wouldn’t be a problem. I mean he was allowed to feel like this right? After all it was Styx and no one liked Styx.

“I'm going to side with Styx here. Amani does this too often and the only one who can talk him out of this is father and he's not here at the moment.” Okay maybe Damion liked Styx and maybe they had a point here. He should get out of bed and just go down stairs and apologize. So Amani got up and got dressed. Right before he got downstairs he heard his fathers car pull out of the driveway. Amani sighed and looked outside to see what he always did. An empty driveway. Still Amani took a deep breath and went downstairs.

“Oh hey bud you ready to go?” Amani looked up to see Asher, the only brother who stayed. The only one who cared.

“You okay bud? You look like you're gonna cry.” This was true in every way. If it wasn’t for the fact that they were late then he would cry and his brother would understand but he didn’t want to do that and get him in trouble. So he didn't. Instead he quietly shook his head no.

“Is it because Damion messed up your hair cut?” Amani's face turned a bit pink with embarrassment.

“Hold on, I'll see if there's a hat anywear.”

“I wouldn’t need a hat if Damion didn’t fuck up my haircut.”

Asher laughed at the remark. In a good five minutes they were able to find a red and black hat with long cords hanging.

“Here put this on.”

So Amani put the hat on and smiled at the living room mirror.

“Okay we might get to school on time if I run while giving you a piggyback ride and pray to god we don’t slip on ice. Give me your things and get on.” So Amani did as told and Asher bolted out the door as Amani held on tight to Asher's neck. As Amani smiled and hoped that maybe this year would be better than the last.

#own story #own style #oc story #hope you like it #ERA

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downins · 3 years

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Yandere Ali abdul headcannons please? Hope you've had a great day today btw :>

you're so sweet <3 i hope you had a great day too :D

!!Minor Spoiler!!

Warning!! : Killing, Yandere stuff

Yandere!Ali Abdul x gn!reader headcanons :

IF SQUID GAME EXISTED

◦When you first met Ali, you thought that he was this really nice and caring guy. But little did you know, he’s a possessive person who will kill anyone that tries to lay a finger on you.

◦Well he doesn’t really show you his true colours because he doesn’t want you to be scared of him. The only thing that mattered to him the most was loving you.

◦He made sure that no one in the game will hurt or talk shit about you. In every game, he’s always close to you. He will definitely help you the way he helped Gi-Hun in the Green Light, Red Light game.

◦Before entering every game, he will hug you and kiss your forehead. He is okay with pda in public, but not in the game.

◦During the night when the fight started, he dragged you to his team and protected you with his life. Yes, he used that huge metal thing to attack the people who tried to hurt you.

◦You were scared when you saw this side of him, but you understood that it’s for your own good. Thanks to him, you’re still alive. And after that, he’ll sleep in the same bed as you and just hold you tightly while whispering some calming words to help you relax.

◦Ali’s greatest fear is losing you, that’s why he would defend you until the very end. This is how he manipulates you. He protects you in every game, and sometimes he’ll get hurt while helping or protecting you.

◦He’s the guilt tripping and manipulative yandere, when you feel like leaving him. You will recall everything he had done for you and that makes you feel bad for leaving. Yes he does care for you genuinely but no one can control his possessive side.

◦He is okay with you making friends but only with certain people like Gi-Hun, Sae Byeok or Il-Nam. Not including Sang Woo in this because you know why. But if you do spend too much time with them instead of him, he’ll just tell you to hang out with him for a while.

◦He shares his food with you if you’re still hungry, you’re his number one priority. He definitely loves to keep you safe and sound. And only Ali can do that for you, not anyone else. He’ll kill them if they try to do so <3.

IF SQUID GAME NEVER EXISTED ( and Ali is rich here :> )

◦Your friends are very jealous of they way Ali treats you, I mean he will literally take a day off just to go out with you.

◦He compliments you a lot on a daily basis, he gives the most special and rare compliments. The ones that not a lot of people will ever say. He makes you feel this way because he wants you to know that there’s no other out there who will love you like him.

◦Yes, he’s also like Sang woo, he takes you on luxurious dates, buys you expensive jewelries, goes on fun vacations with you. Let’s say you’re staring at that ring and necklace, he will pull out his credit card and they’re yours now.

◦Isolation. Yes, he will do anything just to have you close to him. Yeah you can be working but he will be somewhere near you, spying on your every single movement. He even learned how to read lips so that he knows what you’re talking about from afar.

◦When someone flirts with you, he’ll show up behind you and just “nicely” ask them to have a private talk with him. He’ll drag them to an empty and dark corner and make them suffer.

◦Because Ali is rich, he hires bodyguards to protect you wherever you go when he’s busy with work. They don’t really creep up on you a lot but just know that there’s always a group of them watching you. You don’t feel it but yes they’re there all the time.

◦And when they see anyone trying to get your number, they’ll take them somewhere and just beat the person up.

◦Ali is a caring person, a very caring person. He doesn’t do this very often but he will visit your workplace when you’re on holiday, he’ll talk to your boss, making sure everything is doing fine there.

◦When you’re sad or stressed out, Ali is always there to give you a hug and spill out comforting words to you, he will drop everything, even his work, to make you feel better.

◦Ali wants to spend the rest of his life with you. He is a yandere but is there anyone else out there who can provide you the love Ali has for you right now? No <3.

a/n: Ali deserved better, I miss him <//3

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wandaromanova · 3 years

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Little Sister

Pairing: Natasha Romanoff x Fem!Reader

Warnings: one cuss word, minor BW spoilers

A/N: hello! i’d like to note that this takes place sometime before the events in the Black Widow movie! if you haven’t seen the movie yet, please skip over this story and come back later if you’d like! happy reading <3

anon requested: hiii i have a fluff request after seeing bw haha: could you do nat x fem reader where they're laying in bed snuggling, and r asks her about her family and nat tells her and r notices how cute she looks when she's talking about yelena and it's so soft and ahhhh

Summary: Natasha tells her girlfriend about a piece of her past that she never talks about; her sister.

Word Count: 2K

| masterlist | request rules/guidelines | wips |

please do not repost or try and take ownership of my work. reblogs, likes, and comments are always welcome. <3

Natasha Romanoff has lived a lot of lives. She has been through more than most.

Nat had been taken as an infant by an organization that trained little girls to become lethal assassins.

She was psychologically conditioned to become a killer, having taken more lives than she could count.

Eventually, Natasha had managed to break free from the cage she was forced into and was recruited as a S.H.I.E.L.D agent; it was a new start for her, an opportunity to compensate for the red in her ledger.

So, Natasha took her job seriously, saving as many people as she could, even more so when she became an Avenger; one of earth’s mightiest heroes.

Natasha found something in the team that she never really had before; a family. She found a home within the dysfunctional team she had been recruited into.

Not only did Natasha find a family within the Avengers; she also found the love of her life.

Natasha hadn’t even considered the possibility of ever finding love.

For starters, the Red Room had instilled the concept that love was nothing but a distraction; a liability.

She had been taught that love was for children and it was nothing but a weakness that needed to be avoided at all costs.

She was quite literally programmed to be emotionally closed off and to always have her guard up. Letting someone into her heart was a risk she didn’t want to take.

When Natasha gained her independence from the organization, she had to do a lot of self-discovering. She had never been able to be her own person, but now that she could, she quickly learned that she didn’t even know herself.

However, it was Natasha’s insecurities that truly turned her off from the entire idea of love.

How could any ever possibly love her? She thought she was a monster for the things she’d done. She has done the unspeakable since ever she was a child.

What if she wasn’t enough? What if her baggage was too much for someone else to carry? She didn’t want to be a burden. She didn’t want to have to protect someone, just to fail them like she had failed so many others.

Natasha was positive that no one would ever be crazy enough to love her.

Little did she know, she would end up finding someone crazy enough to do so; you.

•❅──────────────── ‎⧗ ────────────────❅•

When the Avengers were formed, you were extremely nervous about it.

All of the files that you’ve read on your new teammates were unbelievable; they were all phenomenal in their own rights. A super-soldier, a god, a genius, a trained-spy.

You were a spy yourself, so you knew exactly who Natasha Romanoff was. She was a S.H.I.E.L.D legend, the best of the best.

You were more nervous about meeting her than anyone else. What if she judged you? What if she didn’t think you were good enough to be an agent, let alone an Avenger?

Not only was she your superior, but she was also your crush. Yeah, you’d never even met the woman before, but you were crushing on her hard.

She was drop-dead gorgeous, but also quite literally a deadly force. Natasha could easily take down anyone she wanted to, and honestly, you wanted to be one of those lucky people.

When you met Natasha for the first time, you were a flustered mess. The redhead found it amusing, how your cheeks turned a bright shade of red and you stumbled over your words as you praised her work.

Natasha never told you this, but she was immediately smitten the moment she laid eyes on you.

There was a kindness and positivity that just radiated off of you and it was extremely contagious.

You were this beaming ball of light that lit up the darkest parts of her soul.

•❅──────────────── ‎⧗ ────────────────❅•

You got to know Natasha extremely well while being on the team. From observing her closely and paying very close attention to her actions, you had managed to pick up on little things.

She didn’t put any creamer or sugar in her sugar; opting for strong, black coffee.

She was kind of a clean freak. If she saw something out of place, she would be quick to put it in the correct place or position.

When she was happy, she would let a small smirk cross her features. When she was annoyed, she would raise her eyebrows.

When she was stressed out or angry, three little creases would appear on her forehead as her eyebrows would knit together tightly; a subtle frown on her face.

Of course, when you began dating the redhead, you didn’t really have to survey her so closely anymore because she’d tell you things herself.

No matter the circumstances, Natasha would always come to you and rant about it. Whether it was about how shitty a mission went or how she beat Clint’s ass during training; you were the only person she wanted to tell.

Natasha had opened up to you, something she never did with anyone. She told you all about her past.

•❅──────────────── ‎⧗ ────────────────❅•

You had some knowledge of Natasha’s previous life, considering it was in her files, but you didn’t realize just how horrible her childhood truly was.

The Red Room, the heavy weight of guilt that rests on her shoulders, the nightmares that forced her to relive the murders she committed, her time as a S.H.I.E.L.D agent, and becoming an Avenger.

She’d go on and on about her road to redemption or ‘clearing the red out of her ledger.’

Natasha was terrified when she told you about her demons. She figured you were going to leave her the second she finished talking, waiting for you to get up and walk out the door, but you didn’t.

So, you completely caught her off guard when you pulled her into a bone-crushing hug, placing a soft kiss onto her temple, the redhead relaxing in your embrace.

“You’re the strongest person I know. It’s not your fault, you were forced and conditioned to do the things you did.”

Natasha focused on the sound of your voice and took in your words as you softly caressed her red locks with one hand.

“Baby, the amount of respect I have for you is immeasurable. I applaud you for turning your life around for the better. I’m so fucking proud of you.”

Your words had brought tears to Natasha’s eyes, which was a rare occurrence.

She was expecting you to run for the hills, but you chose to pull her closer instead.

In that moment, Natasha knew she never had to be afraid of love again.

You were the most understanding and accepting person she’d ever met.

You would never judge her for her worst mistakes; Natasha had found the one for her and she wasn’t ever going to let go.

•❅──────────────── ‎⧗ ────────────────❅•

Now, a few months later and a year into your relationship with the Russian, you were both lying in bed and cuddling.

You were both watching a movie when a particular scene came on. It was of a family gathering around a Christmas tree, children excitedly opening up presents with gleeful smiles across their faces.

“You know, my sister and I got to take pictures with a Christmas tree once.” Natasha spoke, her eyes fixated on the screen.

You looked up at her in shock. You didn’t know that Natasha had a sister. She told you that she didn’t even so much as know her parent’s names.

Natasha looked down and noticed your confused expression. She reached for the remote on the bedside table and paused the movie before returning her gaze to you.

“There was a mission I was assigned to in Ohio, as a kid. I was assigned to play the daughter of two other Russian spies, Alexei and Melina. It wasn’t just me though, there was a little girl who was assigned as my younger sister. Her name is Yelena.”

Natasha had a reminiscent, happy smile on her face as she recalled the brief period time of her childhood. She looked absolutely adorable as she rambled on about this part of her childhood.

“We took photoshoots of various holidays to make our family look more realistic. My favorite one was Christmas. Even though I knew they were just empty boxes, I wanted to rip open every single one.”

Natasha let out a small giggle at the thought. Even though she had a smile on her face, you could feel and hear the underlying tone of sadness in her voice.

“Yelena and I would spend hours outside, just playing together. Swinging on the swing-sets, looking up at the stars, bending over backward, and getting into a ridiculous competition to see who could hold the position the longest… I always let her win.”

You could see the fondness in her eyes, the longing. It warmed your heart that there was a small glimmer of light in Natasha’s past. There was at least a sliver of hope that she clung tightly onto throughout her time in the Red Room.

“After 3 years, the mission ended. Yelena and I were sent back to the Red Room and were torn apart from one another.

Natasha’s breathing grew heavier as she recalled the unfaithful day. The sight of her sister being taken, and not being able to do anything to help her; still haunted the redhead to this day.

“There were so many men with guns and armor, they literally ripped us away from each other. I was eleven and she was only six.”

Your heart sunk at your girlfriend’s words as her smile dropped. She tore her eyes away from yours as she blinked rapidly, fighting back tears, but failed. You reached your hand up to her cheek and wiped away the fallen droplets.

“I haven’t seen her since. I’d like to think that she found a way out and got a life of her own; a nice, happy life.”

Natasha placed her hand on top of yours before looking down at you once more. You sent her a soft smile when she let out a shaky breath.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ

“I knew that the it was all fake, but it was still the best part of my childhood. It was real to me.”

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ

You nodded your head at her words. She took a brief pause, trying to regain her composure, before continuing.

“Even if we have no true relation to one another, and even if I haven’t seen her in years, she is still my little sister.”

Natasha finished off with a big gasp as sobs wracked her body. You sat up from her embrace and pulled her into your arms, just like you had many times before.

You rubbed her back soothingly as she cried into your shoulder, her tears hitting the exposed skin.

“She sounds amazing, baby. I’m really happy that you had some sort of happiness back then and I hope one day you get to see her again.”

You whispered and Natasha pulled away from the hug, still in your arms as her emerald eyes surrounded by a sea of red, a result of her crying.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ

“I doubt she’d even want to see me. I didn’t even try to find her. I’m a horrible sister! I-“

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ

You immediately pressed your lips against hers, effectively getting the Russian to calm down. You broke the kiss when her breathing slowed.

“Honey, of course, she’d want to see you again. Like you said, you guys are sisters. I’m positive that it was just as real to her as it was to you.”

You reassured your girlfriend, her eyes a pool of worry and guilt. You rubbed your thumb against her waist, the material of your her hoodie beneath your touch.

“From what you’ve told me about the Red Room, it would’ve been impossible to find her. Stop beating yourself up over it. You’re the best, and I’m totally not biased or anything.”

Natasha let out a small chuckle at that and you smiled at her, wiping away the last of her tears. She collapsed into your hold further, shoving her face into the crook of your neck.

“Thank you. I don’t know what I’d do without you. I love you so much.”

Natasha’s words came out muffled as her face pressed further into your skin.

“You never need to thank me for anything. I’ll always be here for you, Natty.”

You hugged her as tight as you possibly could, her cold skin meeting your warmth. Natasha let out a small sigh at the feeling.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ

“Wherever you go, I go.”

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ

───────── ･｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ──────────

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afriendlyblackhottie · 3 years

Text

Committed

Summary: It was finally time to make things official.

Pairings: Chris Evans x Reader

Warnings: minors dni, smut, sex in wedding dress, pregnancy sex, missionary, girl on top, squirting, mentions of daddy kink but no daddy kink

(A/N: I wrote this a minute ago, but I couldn’t figure out how to end it so I ended up deciding to keep it short. This is part of Love Like You. Follow, like, comment, and Reblog 💜 ✌🏾)

»»——————————-　♡　—————-————-««

Suddenly you felt fourteen again. Like you were passing him in the hallway at school. Getting a glimpse of him while he didn’t even realize you existed. Except that one time he bumped into you when he was goofing off. You thought you were going to have a heart attack when he bent down to pick up your books. Your friends made fun of you for a week because of how you stuttered out an, ‘it’s okay’ as he apologized profousely. It’s crazy how ten years can change things.

When he first brought up eloping you thought he was just kidding. You chuckled and kissed him which led to another round of sex. He seemed unable to keep his hands off of you already, but since telling him you were pregnant with baby number two he’d been even worse.

As second time parents he was still afraid to do anything. Afraid that if he touched you to roughly during sex, that you’d break. It was nice this time that he knew better not that he could do the things he usually did.

This was different than your pregnancy with Little Chris. This had been planned. There was no panic since you were already a family and knew you could actually take care of yourselves. There was comfort in knowing that despite the bad times you still had each other.

Besides he promised that you could always have a bigger wedding later. After you had your little jellybean. He just wanted to make you his wife already. Needed it after spending too long not making that jump. What was the point in waiting anymore when the both of you knew what you wanted.

So as he said, “I do.”

Then you next. “I do,” your tone all breathy with your heart feeling like it was going to thump out of your chest.

Your best friend Maya on your side with Scott on his. It didn’t even matter that there was only fifteen people here. As he was told to kiss his bride, you felt yourself tearing up before he placed one on you. Your son hugging Chris’ leg grinning so wide.

The plan was for Little Chris to stay at his Ma’s to give you alone time. God knows you needed it. You still hadn’t even told everyone you were pregnant yet. Your bump was barely showing and the dress you were wearing was hiding it enough.

As soon so you got into the hotel room, he kissed you. Grabbing your hips to lead you to the bed. He sat down bunching up the bottom of your dress so you could straddle his lap.

His dick so hard underneath you. You rubbed your center into him.

“Chris,” you whimpered as he started kissing down your neck. He didn’t stop instead grabbing into his bride’s ass so he could flip you over to lay you down.

“Yes, Mrs. Evans,” he teased, kissing your nose.

“I love you.” You put your hand on his cheek.

“God I love you so damn much,” he sighed contently pressing his lips into yours once again because he couldn’t get enough. Not that it wasn’t always like this, but now with you as his wife he felt himself getting obsessed over the thought.

As soon as he’d seen you in your dress he knew he’d have to make love to you while you wore it. Even for such a small event you were the prettiest bride he’d ever laid his eyes on.

He thought back to last year. How he’d missed the holidays. How much he missed you and CJ. It’s crazy how fast things can change. Now you were here in his arms as his wife and he doesn’t think he could ever be happier.

It’s crazy how things can change so quickly. How he’d thought you’d hate him forever for not being around. As he kissed you, making you moan, worshipping you like he’d never get the chance to touch you ever again. Except he’d be able to do this for the rest of his life.

“Chris,” you whimpered again. He chuckled against your neck which he’d started trailing kisses down a moment ago. “Fuck, please.”

“Tell me what you want,” he said. “I need to hear it.”

“I want you. Want you to touch me.”

“Touch you where?”

“Everywhere, Chris, I need you,” you sounded as desperate as you felt. For some reason knowing that he was your husband now and that you were having his baby made you so needy for his touch. Not like you weren’t always, but you wanted this to be extra good.

He smiled down at you. “Don’t worry, Baby. I got you.” There was something about when you moaned his name. Normally you called him Daddy in bed and fuck he loved it, but those times where you’d whimper out his name made him feral.

He took it upon himself to start kissing up and down your stomach. He was so obsessed with showering your barely there bump with love.

“Chris,” you mewled as soon as his lips touched your clit. Tongue swirling around the nub as he held the crotch of your panties to the side. Fuck you should have never agreed to cut his hair because even though he looked hot as hell, you missed tugging on it when he was eating you out.

He pushed two of his fingers into you making you whimper. Even as he went back up your body until he was kissing you again. “Is it bad that I wanna do a do over after you’ve had the baby so that I can put another baby into you?”

You rolled your eyes. “I think you have a fetish,” you managed to get out even though it was a little distracting the way he was stuffing his fingers in your cunt.

“Don’t tell me you’re complaining.”

You giggled, wrapping your arms around his neck. “Never.” You had a sharp intake of air as he pressed into the bundle of nerves inside of you. “Fuck.”

“You like that?” He asked with a smirk.

“Mhm,” you breathed. “I like it a lot.”

“Yeah?” He grinned because he loved watching you in your white dress as you squirmed.

You nodded then moaned. “Oh my god, Baby!” You cried, tightening around his fingers.

“Gonna cum for me already?” He asked before kissing your lips. “Gonna cum for your husband?”

You nodded, breathing all heavy. “Yes.”

“Yeah? Gonna cum for me?”

You nodded, your jaw dropping open as you started reaching your peak. Needing to cum for him.

“Does my cute little wife want to cum on my hand?”

“God, yes!” Your eyes rolled to the back of your head as he finally made you cum.

He smiled, nuzzling your nose with his. “That’s my good girl. Cum for me, Baby. That’s it.” He kissed you, fingers going to your achy clit.

You made out for what felt like ever. Tongues moving against each other’s. Him lazily playing with your pussy still. Your hands finally going to his dick which was getting harder in his pants.

You flipped him over so that he was on his back, straddling his lap. His hands grabbed at your ass now as you grinned center into his clothed dick reaching between the two of you so you could palm it. Your panties already wet from your previous orgasm so it was making a mess on his pants.

“Nasty wife wants me to fuck her in her wedding dress, huh?” He asked with a smirk.

You nodded as you started to work on unbuckling his belt before he took over while you unzipped him. When his dick was out it was like it didn’t even matter that you’d seen it so many times. It was just so damn beautiful and all yours.

He lifted you up, making you gasp as he worked to take his pants off. “Hey! Watch the merchandise!”

He laughed, tilting his head back. “I didn’t want you to get up.”

You touched your belly, pouting at him. “Jellybean is probably in there feeling like she’s on a coaster.”

He didn’t let up, rubbing the back of your thigh then coming to the front to touch your belly. “You don’t even know if they’re a she yet.”

“I know, but I have a feeling,” you replied shrugging your arms. “Then we have a boy and a girl and we don’t have to think about it ever again.”

He snorted. “You wish. I’m getting as many babies out of you as I can.”

You shook your head before leaning down to kiss him. “Oh yeah? And how many you think we could handle?”

“I’m thinking twelve.” He pecked your lips. “Maybe twenty.”

You laughed. “We are not about to be on some Duggar shit.”

“If that’s what it takes,” he said before getting a nice grip on your ass making you hiss.

“Chris,” you let out a breathy moan as he massaged you. “How many babies again?”

“Don’t tell me I got you thinking about popping out baby after baby,” he said. “Cuz the minute I get a yes, I’m holding you to it forever.”

You put your hands on either side of his face. “What if I want it.”

“Yeah?” He grinned. He honestly felt like he was dizzy with love. Though technically it wouldn’t really change your relationship that much. There was something about it. Made him feel almost primal to call you his wife. Fuck he did have a fetish.

The more he thought about it, the more he needed. It didn’t matter that he’d already bred you he was trying to show you that it would be happening against. Whether you wanted it or not. He owned your pussy before saying ‘I do,’ but he just really make sure you absolutely understood.

“Chris!” You squeaked as he pushed inside of you. He was trying not to be too rough, but the more he started to thrust into you the less it felt like he could help it.

“You’re gonna be my good wife, huh?” He groaned. “Gonna come home to you making dinner every fucking night. Keep you full of my babies.”

You nodded. “Yes, Chris!” Then let out a gasp because he’d angled his hips so he could hit your spot.

“That’s it,” he said. “That’s my girl. Gonna breed you for as long as I fucking can. Cuz this is my pussy. You fucking hear me?”

“I know,” you whimpered. He put his hand on the back of your head so you were forced to look him in the eye until he finally made you squirt.

When he finally helped you out of your dress, you got on top of him so you could ride his cock. He gripped your hips so he could help you move up and down his length. Your moans filling the room as he fucked you.

God, you couldn’t wait to spend the rest of your life getting dicked down like this.

#chris evans smut #chris evans x black!reader #chris evans x reader #chris evans x poc!reader #chris evans x female reader #love like you.

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fromasgardandback · 2 years

Text

Volunteer Work

Avengers x Reader

christmas | masterlist | oneshots

Volunteering during the holiday season had to have been the Avenger’s most rewarding and uplifting time. Tony would set a five-day retreat somewhere in the world to help and three more retreats during the year to help in the United States. This time, Tony had set it to be in Africa. Yes, I know, we are a team of superheroes whose job is to save the world, but this meant something deeper to each of us. We got to be one on one with those in need. We chose the time to go be with them and help instead of waiting for a crisis to occur. The team split up into different groups to do different volunteer work. Each day was a different volunteer, from food delivery, homeless shelter, hospital care, shelter, and home building, and lastly animal care. The first day I went to the homeless shelter with Loki, Thor, Wanda, and Scott. We were group 3 that would be traveling around to each work with. We talked with the people, helped them get cleaned up, and did some therapy with them. There was one specific little girl that’s smile was wider than the sea. She had these beautiful big eyes and talked about her dreams and ambitions like no one could stop her, and they couldn’t. The second day was food delivery to different places in the town. The overwhelming feeling of seeing people’s faces light up when you hand them the boxes of food and supplies was remarkable. The third day was the shelter and homebuilding. There was a lot of homes that have been destroyed over time from natural disaster to military enforcement. Those homes were now rebuilt to withstand any kind of disaster and to uphold more people to get better in. One of our favorite places to rebuild was the women and children center. The school was also another favorite to build and help the kids place their belongings in. The fourth day was animal care. We got to go on a Safari ride to the endangered animals. They were beautiful creations of God that had been hurt and abused by others. We showed them love, affection, and care throughout the day. On our last day, the fifth day we went to the hospital. This was saved last because we wanted to spend extra time with the adults and children in the hospital beds. They were so sick and in need. I sat next to this happy baby boy. He was just laying there in the orphanage part of the hospital. I gently picked him up, swaddling him in a light blanket. He had these big eyes that just stared back at me. Light and happiness shined through them. I wanted to take him home, but the nurses said he got adopted and was waiting for his parents to arrive. I sadly nodded, wishing I could be the one to love on him. I rocked him slowly, lulling him to sleep with a lullaby.

“He’s quite taken with you.” Loki smiled, looking over at me. He was standing and watching another child.

“I’m quite taken with him too.” I smiled, kissing the baby’s head sweetly.

It was lovely to see the rest of the team in a different light. What a gratifying week for the entire team. To see and talk to the people who were hurting and know they had someone in their corner. To hear the children laugh and play as if their painful struggles were normal life. One thing was for certain that it broke all of our hearts to leave them. We knew we had to go back home. We knew we had more work to get done. It puts life into the perspective of what is truly important and what is not. Volunteering was our favorite part of the holiday season.

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generallybarzy · 3 years

Text

If You'll Have Me Forever.

an: this is the little fic i decided to write based on a dream i had. I wrote it all in one day while I was at my grandparent's house with no internet or computer, so i wrote it all in my notebook and then typed it up on here haha.

warnings: unedited, mentions of past emotional trauma and unhealthy families

word count: 1.7k

You always loved spending time with Mat's family. Whenever there was a break in the season, you two quickly found yourselves on a plane out to Vancouver, holding hands in the airplane and in the car on the way to his parent's house.

It had been like this since your first summer with them. Mat had invited you home with him for part of the offseason, and although you'd only been dating almost a year and were still nervous to meet his family, you couldn't say no. His family had welcomed you warmly, in fact, warm may not even be good enough to describe it. His parents smiled as soon as they saw you- saw you holding their son's hand, saw him smile proudly as he finally introduced you to them as his girlfriend.

Then, they hugged you.

You hadn't come from a loving family, not one where you openly told each other "I love you" or "I'm proud of you", and certainly not one that hugged and had family game nights. After much discussion with Mat and with your therapist, you came to the conclusion that your family had been borderline emotionally neglectful, and you saw how your childhood had scarred you. Mat's family was so openly affectionate and loving towards you right off the bat that it overwhelmed you, to the point of you going upstairs and refusing to come down until Mat had a talk with you. He was understanding, gently told them to be a little more reserved, and helped to slowly ease you into their love. And that just made you love him even more.

Now, it was your first holiday season with them. After spending a good chunk of last summer in Vancouver, you were certainly excited to spend a few days of your winter here with them rather than in your empty little apartment. You and Mat had flown out the night before, and arrived early in the morning, grateful that the team had managed a few extra days off this season- just enough days to make a trip worth it. The whole day had been spent talking and laughing and just catching up with his family about the past year- how things were going with your studies, with your job, how Mat’s season was going, and how your relationship was going. Later in the evening, after a long round of some board game they’d pulled from the closet, the jet lag and overwhelming, unfamiliar feeling of familial love caught up to you. So, in the middle of preparing some snacks to munch on during the next round of the game, you faked a phone call and quickly excused yourself to the snowy back patio, slipping into your coat and snow boots on the way and disappearing out the door.

Mat had been keeping a close eye on you all night.

He knew how you got about affection, you were even still a little shy receiving love from him, and the last thing he wanted to do was let him or his family overwhelm you again. He had gone to talk with his dad for five minutes- about a topic that had him immediately searching for you to go hide away and get some much needed alone time- and when he came back to the living room, you weren’t where he left you with his mom and sister.

“Where’s (Y/N)?”

“Oh,” his mom looked up from preparing the food. “She stepped out back to take a phone call.”

“Yeah?” Mat snuck over to the backdoor, squinting out into the snow and spotting your figure, no phone in sight. He slipped on a pair of shoes and grabbed his jacket from next to the door. “I think the jetlag might be stting in. I’ll be right back.”

He stepped out onto the back patio, the snow crunching beneath his fluffy slippers. You didn’t even turn when you heard the door close behind him, and that’s how he knew something was wrong.

“Baby… what are you doing out in the cold?” He came up next to you, curling an arm over your shoulders. “Were they too much? Should I tell them to back off a bit?” Finally, you turned to face him. Your eyes were wet and red, but you had a soft little smile on your face. “Aw, baby.”

“I love them so much, Mat.”

“C’mere.” He pulled you against his chest, rubbing his hands up and down your cold arms. You curled your arms around his waist, snuggling in under his winter jacket. “Babe, you should be wearing something heavier out here. I don’t want you getting sick.” Still, you stayed where you were, tucked into his jacket with him and hiding away from the snow and the world. “I’m glad you love my family so much. I hope you can tell they love you too. And if they’re too much, I’ll tell them, okay?”

“I know.”

“Just let me know. I know how you get uncomfortable when you receive this much love, but I hope you know you deserve it, okay? You’re absolutely amazing.” At his words, you lifted your face from the comfort of his chest, eyes red and face hot, streaked with tears. Snowflakes melted on impact, and Mat’s thumb brushed away the wetness. “Please don’t cry, baby.”

“I’m just… so overwhelmed. In the best way possible, I promise.”

“That’s good.”

“And I’m getting sleepy.”

“Jetlag finally catching up to you?” You nodded, burrowing back into the warmth of his jacket. He smiled, squeezing you against him. “Let’s go to bed, yeah, sweetheart?”

“Nooooo, I just wanna stay like this.”

“Okay, okay.” He smiled and lifted his hands in mock surrender. “We’ll stay out here for a little, but we gotta go in when you get cold.” Mat knew the reason you didn’t want to go back inside yet. One, because you didn’t want to cry in front of his family, but also because after spending the whole day with them, you were starved of sweet, gentle moments like this, alone with Mat. He knew you loved his family, but God, how you loved him. You’d been holding back all your hugs and kisses today, keeping low on the PDA in front of his family, and you’d gotten needy. He pulled out his phone and sent a quick text to his parents, saying the two of you were gonna be done for the night and wanted a little alone time, and he knew they’d understand and head to bed. The snow was picking up now, so Mat put his phone back in his pocket and pulled you with him against the wall of the house, your arms tucked under his fuzzy coat and holding tight around his waist, watching the snow fall and enjoying the comforting silence of the world.

“Do you know how much people love you?”

“Mat…” You smiled and hid your face shyly.

“No, do you know? Everyone who meets you falls a little bit in love with you. Everyone. You just have this… this loveable nature to you/ You’re the sweetest, kindest, most amazing person I know.” You didn’t respond, but Mat saw the smile on your face and felt the way your arms squeezed around his torso. “Remember how earlier, I was talking to my dad? You know what he was saying? He said ‘the way you look at (Y/N), that’s how I looked at your mom’. And how he still does.” That got your attention, and you lifted your face to look at him, at the pretty, genuine love in his dark eyes. “Hey, there’s that pretty face!” Your hands slid further up his back, and you perched up on your tiptoes, reaching up for a soft kiss that Mat gladly met you halfway for. “I’m serious when I say I love you, okay?”

“I know.”

“I get that you didn’t have the best relationship with your family, and they weren’t the healthiest, especially when it came to showing these types of emotions, but I’m gonna make sure you get used to it. Cause you’re gonna be in my life for a long, long time.”

“Forever?”

“If you’ll have me forever.”

Everything went silent, save for the soft falling of snow, at that whispered promise. The tears filled your eyes again, just so, so happy that you had someone like Mat in your life, and that he was so understanding and patient with you.

“If you’ll have me forever, my family would be more than happy to call you one of us. You could spend all your birthdays, holidays, and celebrations here, and they’d love you. I’d love you. I do. You’d never feel unloved again, if you’ll have me forever.”

“Mat are... Are you proposing?”

He shook his head quickly. “No. Not yet, not officially. Just take this as a… warning.”

You laughed a little bit. “A warning, Mat?”

“No, ugh… um, how about a promise. Yeah, a promise. A promise that if you’ll have me forever, I’ll do nothing but show you how damn loveable you are. I know I can’t erase the years of pain… God, or the trauma that your family put you through, but I promise you I’m gonna try my hardest. You deserve so much better than what they’d given to you, and I’ll give that to you.” Mat saw the tears in your eyes and swooped down to kiss your cheeks repeatedly. “I’m sorry. Didn’t mean to make you cry, baby.” He could say so, so much more, but he wanted to take care of you first. “Enough of my sappy rambling, yeah? My toes are freezing. Can we go in?” He saw you glance down at his feet and immediately started giggling.

“Nice slippers, grandpa.”

“They’re cozy.” He grinned, happy to see you smiling again. He had grabbed his dad’s shoes to come out, knowing you found his silly dad-fashion funny. “Now, let’s get to bed, sleepyhead.” He pulled you back into the warm, quiet house and led the way up to his bedroom, happy to finally have some time to just cuddle up under the blankets along with you. But as you fell asleep, tucked safely in his arms with a content, peaceful smile, he could fall asleep along with you. Instead, he lay there, watching you for hours, his thoughts filled with his dad’s words from earlier and quietly, secretly, he was writing long lines of phrases he wanted to say to you, phrases that would one day become part of his proposal.

I promise I’ll keep you safe, I promise I’ll keep you smiling and loved... if you’ll have me forever.

#mat barzal #mat barzal x reader #mat barzal fic #op #fic

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xnchxntmxnt · 3 years

Text

Falling Asleep on FaceTime

Alright first of all these aren’t proof read at all I am so sorry—

Anyway! I love good wholesome fic and I decided I wanted to do something (even if it’s not holiday themed) for Valentine’s Day! I just got these finished up so I’m very excited

If you like these, let me know! Depending on how this does, I may do a part two (?)

Characters: Yamaguchi Tadashi, Tsukishima Kei, Kozume Kenma, Bokuto Kotaro TW//CW: none! much fluff, very sweet All GN!Reader

Please don’t repost my edits! However if you want to use them for a header/icon feel free just credit me please and thank you!

Enjoy!

Yamaguchi Tadashi

TH I S M A N

Good god he’s so in love

like so so in love he loves you so much

It would be late at night and he’s getting tired and so are you but you’re both stubborn and wanna keep talking

You’re laying in bed with the blankets pulled up to your face when he’s like “hey no I like to see you”

So you move the blankets down a little so he can see you and you can see him better

He mentions how beautiful/handsome (whichever adjective you prefer) you are and you call him adorable

That makes his nose scrunch up when he smiles which is even more cute

However you’re falling asleep as you’re trying to talk

So he starts humming to you, trying to get you to go to sleep because we stan a caring boyfriend

And once you’re almost asleep he pauses and just mumbles “I love you” before continuing

That makes your heart melt but you’re nowhere near awake enough to say anything about it so you just hum in response and fall asleep

He thinks you’re the most perfect person to ever exist and loves seeing you sleepy because it makes you look that much cuter and he loves seeing that vulnerable & soft side of you

He’s so in love—

Tsukishima Kei

He probably called to tell you about some dinosaur fact he learned or complain about how stupid Kageyama and hinata were being during practice

However you were laying down to take a nap

You actually texted him when he called and said “I’m gonna take a nap”

And then he called back again

Which is his way of saying ‘I want to see you but I won’t say it out loud’ because we love our little bby tsundere here

(Little bby tsundere I say about a man who could kick my ass and if he couldn’t his best friend could) (anyway)

So you’re listening to him talk and he has a very nice voice to listen to so you just do. And after a while you can’t focus on his words but instead just. Fall asleep like you were planning on doing

He’d stay on and keep talking, not because he didn’t notice you were asleep, but because that’s how you slept when you visited him too. He talked and you listened and you eventually stayed asleep. He figured it would keep you asleep

After an hour or so you wake back up to see a ceiling on your phone

He heard you moving to points the camera back at himself and gets this stupid half smirk half smile and you love and he goes “good morning, prince/princess/your grace, did you sleep well?”

Which makes you laugh bc he’s a sarcastic jerk but he’s your sarcastic jerk and you love him

Kozume Kenma

Kenma

He’s Kenma

We know this

He was probably playing video games when you called because when is he not tbh

But he was playing games and you called so he sat his phone on the bed and titled it so you could see him and kept playing

He’d occasionally say hi or comment on what you were saying but you knew he wasn’t paying attention to you

After he lost he cursed the thing he was fighting out, then turned to you and apologized for not paying attention to you the way he should

But oh no

Ur asleep

But its not like bored asleep you were still smiling kinda

He took a quick screenshot because you were so adorable (new homescreen, anyone?) and went back to playing his game

But he’d occasionally look back over to you and tell you what was happening even though you weren’t listening

When he’s done playing video games for the time being he lays down in bed and just looks at you for a while because you’re so soft at the moment and its adorable

And he plugs his phone in, props it up against his pillow and ends up falling asleep next to you (even if its virtually)

But not before mumbling a quick “i love you, kitten” (bc I’m a sucker for nicknames)

Bokuto Koutaro

Can we talk about how WHIPPED this man is already like

Like really

He’s so in love it isn’t funny anymore

He gushes about you to everyone and i swear i’ll write something about this mans one day i SWEAR

But in the mean time

He’s gushing about you to you of all people because he just loves you! And wants to remind you how much he loves you!

So he’s just going off about how amazing you are

And you cut him off mid sentence because hes been talking for five minutes without breathing

And youre like “kou, baby. I love you but i’m tired”

And he tilts his head to the sid because Confused

“I don’t wanna bore you because im falling asleep on the phone”

“Oh i don’t mind! As long as you don’t, of course! I can keep talking!”

“I don’t mind babe”

“Yay! Okay, so, as I was saying--”

And just continues talking

He finally stops to take a breath after a little while and notices you’re half awake and just staring at him with the biggest heart eyes ever (how can you not, look at him. Look at the owl boy. He’s adorable)

Those heart eyes melt HIS heart though and he gets this HUGE SMILE across his face and just says “go to sleep, baby, you deserve it”

Not bothering to fight sleep anymore, you do, but don’t hang up, expecting him to

No, he puts himself on mute and screams into a pillow for five minutes because you’re so adorable and he physically cannot handle how much he loves you

He then takes 30 million screenshots (this is probably not exaggerating)

And THEN finally hangs up to let you sleep

Well I hope you guys enjoyed! These boys are so soft, I can’t. They’re great. Even tsukki has his moments, however few and far between.

Happy Valentine’s Day! Remember romantic love isn’t the only love to celebrate—reach out to your friends or family and tell them you love them. Or, remind yourself how amazing you are!

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hp-imagines-07 · 3 years

Text

The Most Unfortunate Days of The Month

Sirius Black x Fem!Reader

Universe: Harry Potter; The Marauders era

Type: just fluff and angst?

Summary: [y/n] is on her period and the only thing she needs is Sirius.

Request: yes|NO

Prompt: xxx

Warnings: cursing and periods, cramps and all that shit

Song: xxx

Word Count: 1.0K (it was supposed to be a blurb, sorry)

Posted: 7th of May 2021

A/N: I'm on my period and I had a Sirius to hold and love me, that's why I wrote this, just enjoy it and please, send me blurb asks!!!!!!!

MY MASTERLIST

Your eyes opened with the sudden feeling of your hair moving and looked up, seeing your cat playing with a few strands of your hair, which brought a smile to your face for half a second. That was until you felt that pain in your lower back and the feeling of your uterus being stabbed multiple times, over and over again.

A groan got out of your mouth almost as an involuntary reaction to the reminder of your period and as your cat looked at you with its head bent to the side with the sudden noise. Looking around your dorm, you found everyone asleep and relief filled your senses as you recognised it's Saturday.

'Thank Godric.' You thought as you tried to get up without making a sound of pain.

Checking the time, you noticed it was around time for breakfast in the Great Hall and you decided to go there to try to find any of the Marauders - because even being early, they never skip breakfast.

And you needed Sirius now.

That was the only thing you were certain of.

He is the only person who knows how to help you during these days of each month. He is the only person who doesn't laugh when you cry over nothing. He is the only person who knows the way he should massage your back so the hurt can relief. He is the only person who knows which songs calm you down and make you feel comfortable. He is the only person who knows how to hold you when your uterus is hurting like hell.

Sirius is the one. Period.

You knew it, he knew it too, but it was too soon to share or even think too much about. You were still in Hogwarts and you had so much time to still be together. It kind of felt like an unspoken agreement that you two would be together forever, and each 'I love you' just made it even more real.

But future wasn’t something in your head while you felt like fucking dying.

After changing into some comfortable clothes, you walked to the Great Hall with your favourite muggle fiction novel in hand. The halls were calm, probably even more peaceful than the last Christmas holidays you spent at Hogwarts. It felt weird not having to back out from people so you wouldn't get knocked down or end up getting a black eye.

Walking through the giant doors of the Great Hall, the first thing you noticed was how crowded it was and the thought that breakfast had just started crossed through your mind, but you didn't think much of it as your eyes found a pair of grey ones that shone with the mere sight of you.

All your worries washed away for a second when you noticed that Sirius knew you were on your period by just the look on your face. And he got up from the bench, without even saying goodbye to his three best-friends, already walking your way.

You met him halfway through the crowds of people trying to find a seat in between the benches of different houses and it didn't take a second for Sirius to hold you in between his loving and comforting arms. His strong arms were around your waist, holding you close to his chest while your arms were around his neck with your face buried in his neck.

"Good morning, my love." He whispered in your ear as his hands started to slightly press their palms and fingertips onto your lower back, massaging it. A sigh left from your lips when the tension started to drift away and you felt his lips in your hairline, giving it a soft peck.

"Ugh, I need you." Your painful whimper made Sirius' heart clench with the sight of your hurt.

"It's alright, angel, let's go to my dorm." Padfoot spoke softly and separated from you enough so he could see your face. "Just grab something for you to eat and we'll be alone. The boys will be outside all day..." You nodded, being only able to agree as you wanted to get away from there as soon as possible. You grabbed a muffin and held Sirius hand as you walked out of the Great Hall, already pulling him to your final destination, where you would finally be able to just try to relax.

The first thing you did as you walked through the door of the Marauders' dorm was to throw yourself at Sirius' bed. You felt horrible and all you needed was some sleep and cuddles. Sirius closed the door and took your and his shoes off, dropping it beside the door.

"How's your reading been going?" He asked with a soft voice to not bother you if you had a headache and pointed to the book you were holding as he sat beside your limping body.

"Well, it's good..." You trailed off as you sat up to let Sirius sit behind you and he did just what you wanted, but instead of you laying down with your back against his chest, you laid down with your back up between his legs and with your head resting in his abs.

"Only good? I remember you telling me yesterday that there was a super plot twist in the story but you fell asleep before telling me what was it..." Sirius trailed off while one of his hands massaged your lower back and the other one caressed your scalp.

"I didn't tell you?!" Your voice was a little louder and a smile grew on Sirius' face when he noticed how you were getting excited just talking about your favourite books, just like you always did.

And the rest of the day was like that. The peaceful environment of you holding Sirius and Sirius holding you while you rambled excitedly about your books while Sirius only listened, looking at you with a love-struck expression.

Sirius loved you so much, he just wished he could take all the pain you felt once a month away from you…

But as he couldn't do that, Sirius would spend the rest of his life holding you and taking care of you on the most unfortunate days of the month.

☽☾☽☾☽☾☽☾☽☾☽☾☽☾☽☾☽☾☽☾

Taglist:

@cheapglitter @weasleysmuch @potters-heart @writtenbypics @littlemaladaptivedaydreamer @dralf0yy @buff-bork @rd155 @seppys-return-to-madness @luciferedits @old-soul-young-mind @pxtrickhxckstettxr @sleep-i-ness @marauderswhisperer @liberty01 @gweaslvy @weasleytwins-41 @siriuslysirius1107 @turtlepad @ilovewinter101 @monimillion @simonsbluee @smokey102 @aberette13 @yourbloodyqueen @loverboyreid @eeshea @susceptible-but-siriusexual @weareloserstogether @queenofthepouges @gracielou0518 @lukedetails @kiwi-sloan @wonderful-writer @666cookies @kateriinabovos @mflufflion @zzzzzcakes @mysticalmalfoy @lostaurorax @brithedemonspawn @tinylumpiaa @milkshakelol @spookybooisa @sarcasticallywitty15 @rue-123 @sarcasticallywitty15 @inglourious-imagines @simpforelliie @cruelsummer-s @novelist2 @nottherealslimshady

#sirius black #sirius orion black #sirius black fanfiction #sirius black fic #sirius and reader #sirius imagine #sirius black headcanon #sirius black imagine #sirius black blurb #sirius black smut #sirius black x reader #sirius x y/n #sirius black x y/n #sirius x you #sirius x reader #sirius black x you #sirius black x fem!reader #sirius black fluff

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mediocre-writerr · 3 years

Text

you belong with me [cassie howard]

cassie howard x fem reader

requested: Hey! Can I request a f! reader x Cassie Howard fic where the reader is in love with Cassie, but it's like a slow burn happy holidays! xx

key: italics stand for rue’s voiceover! enjoy

*not my gif*

Y/N Y/L/N and Cassie Howard have been best friends since they were little. Y/N was always there for Cassie during her whole childhood. Watching her from the sidelines as her figure skating became more and more incredible.

“Y/N! When are you gonna get off your lazy bum and join us?” Cassie’s dad asks during one of their many ice skating practice sessions.

You were taken back by surprise and you looked towards Cassie who was giving you her best pouty lips and eyes, “Oh okay.”

You strapped on the ice skates that the Howard family bought you for your 10th birthday. A gift you rarely used. But was still grateful for nevertheless.

Back before your Cassie started getting into ice skating your family was big about hockey. So you knew the in’s and out’s of ice skating, but you weren’t good at doing cool tricks.

“Y/N, you’re a natural!” Cassie says as you start skating towards her.

And it’s like she jinxed you or something because you started slipping. Flailing your hands up in the air. But she caught you and the two of you just stared at each other smiling coyly.

Her lips were inches away from yours. But her dad cleared her throat, looking at the two of you with a small smirk on his face.

Y/N and Cassie were inseparable, nothing seemed to ever get in between them. Lexi always gave Y/N looks and have conversations where she tried to make her think that it was something more than just a friendship, but she was easy to laugh off or ignore.

Lexi thought of Y/N as a second sister growing up together and having Y/N be over all the time. So when she saw the way Y/N looked at her older sister she couldn’t help but want to protect her.

She didn’t want you to get hurt, but how could Cassie ever hurt Y/N?

Y/N loved Cassie more than a friend. There was never a specific moment when Y/N found out she liked Cassie. It was everything about her, all of the moments leading up to since they were young kids.

Much to her disappoint, Cassie’s underlying daddy issues made her attached to boys in more ways than anyone could ever possibly. She fell in love too fast and dare I say it, was too naive.

Cassie wanted to be loved and never wanted to be alone. She wanted all the boys no matter how stupid, sweet, or mean they were. And that led to many nights of crying in Y/N’s arms about some boy who leaked her nudes or made a sex tape or broke her heart.

“Y/N?” she whispers over the phone, her voice already cracking.

You shot up from laying down on your bed and instantly woke up at the sound of your first love crying, “Hey is everything okay?”

“No. I can’t. Someone made a sex tape of me and leaked it and I just really need you.” she whispers, trying to get all of the words out.

“I’ll be there in five.”

Luckily for the two of you, you didn't live far. And before you knew it you were climbing in her bedroom window.

She instantly pulled you into a hug and you wrapped your arms around her waist. Placing a hand on the back of her head to pull her close. You started rubbing the back of her head, threading your fingers through her hair.

“It’s gonna be okay.” I whisper, “I’m here now. You’re gonna be okay.”

Y/N always protected Cassie. Ever since the first pictures of her nudes were leaked she was there to let her cry. Her first sex tape was leaked, Y/N was there. A boy broke her heart, Y/N was there to pick up the pieces to put her back together.

Y/N hoped that one day she wouldn’t feel this way anymore. Or one day Cassie would realize that she was there all along. But it never happened. And it seemed like it would never happen when Cassie started dating McKay.

Y/N insisted she wasn’t jealous, but she also insisted she wasn’t jealous about all of Cassie’s suitors.

“McKay is a good guy Y/N!” Cassie yells.

The two of you were having yet another argument. And you weren’t angry at her or at McKay, you were just tired. So fucking tired.

“What’s wrong, Y/N?” Cassie asked, “This is your third snide comment this week about McKay this week and it’s only 10 am on a Monday!”

“I’m sorry for being bitter. I’m just tired.” you whisper.

Lexi gave you a sympathetic smile and look. And you just smiled back softly.

See you weren’t jealous. That would involve anger and you weren’t angry. You didn’t hate McKay.

Sure, there were thing that he did that was questionable at best, but he was wasn’t the worst out of all of Cassie’s boyfriends.

Even though your happiness was slowly dwindling away each time you saw them at a party. Or each time she canceled plans to go hang out with him instead of you. Or each time you saw them kiss.

Even though all of it was fading away in you. She didn’t deserve to lose anything when she was so happy. So you tried to stay the same for her and not act any differently.

Lexi had been a good friend to Y/N and did her best to try and pull her out of it. The annual carnival was coming up and it used to be a tradition for the three girls to go together, but Cassie was busy with McKay...again.

The two of you ran into McKay on the way to the Ferris Wheel. Much to both of your surprise you didn’t find Cassie next to him, “Where’s Cassie?” Lexi asked.

“Oh I don’t know we called it a night a couple hours ago.” he said with a shrug before going back to Nate and Mr. Jacobs.

Both of you looked at each other and immediately knew something was up. Agreeing to split up both of you searched the carnival in chance to find her.

That’s when you saw her going around the carrousel with Daniel. She was grinding against the pole of the horse. And Daniel looked like he was getting turned on by it.

But there was something about her that was off. She looked high. You were gonna leave, but you decided to wait for the ride to stop. Before ultimately taking her home, you didn’t want some asshole like Daniel to take advantage of her in the state she was in.

As soon as the ride stopped you hopped the fence that separated the line to get to her. Despite all the yelling from the person who controls the ride you made your way to Cassie.

“Hey Cassie. How about we get you out of here, okay?” you ask.

“Y/N! I didn’t know you were here.” she slurs and you nod smiling.

“I’m right here.” you whisper to her, unbuckling her seatbelt and lifting her off.

Daniel scoffed, “What the fuck Y/L/N?! We were in the middle of something!” he yelled annoyed.

“Not anymore.” you reply.

You guided her towards the exit, but saw that she was stumbling and it was hard for her to walk. So you did what you thought was best and picked her up bridal style.

Cassie wrapped her arms around your neck and nestled into your chest, “Can you believe McKay said to people we weren’t dating? We were just chilling. He literally told me that he loved me yesterday.” she says angrily.

“I’m sorry love. You don’t deserve that.” you whisper back as you saw Lexi, Jules, and Rue running towards the two of you.

Lexi looked at her sister frantically, “Is she okay? Do you need help? I can get her for you.

“Lex take a breath,” you whisper and she nods taking a deep breath, “She’s okay, she just looks a little high off of something. But I got her.”

Lexi nods and we all get into Cassie’s car. Jules and Rue decided to stay at the carnival a little longer, but we thought it was best if we got her home.

Cassie passed out across your lap as you just ran your fingers through her hair. Staring at the beautiful girl in front of you.

“I wish she could see that you were always there for her. She needs someone like you in her life.” Lex whispers looking at you through the rearview mirror.

But the thing is Cassie never noticed. As much as she would hate to agree with me, she took Y/N for granted most of the time. She just assumed that her best friend since basically birth would always be there for her.

She learned that the hard way.

You were more tired than usual as you sat on the couch of McKay’s house. You were at one of his infamous parties seated next to Lexi, Rue, and Jules.

Lexi and Rue begged you to come and you agreed without hesitation. But then you realized that you would have to see them dancing close to one another, kissing, and just being with each other.

The other three girls proceeded in conversation, but you were too tired to contribute. So despite all of the loud music and drunk people, you laid your head on Lexi’s shoulder trying your hardest to just shut everything out for a few minutes.

And you were about to shut everything out when you heard your name being slurred, “Y/N, what’s wrong?”

You opened your eyes a little, not wanting to leave the comfortable spot you found on Lexi’s shoulder.

“It’s nothing, Cassie, really. I just have a headache.” you whisper, trying your best to smile at her.

“Why are you lying to me?” she asks, crossing her arms over her chest.

Of course she knew when you were lying,

“Just let it go, please.” you pleaded with her.

You didn’t want all of this to come out now. Not when she was tipsy. Not when all of your friends and a bunch of random strangers were around to hear.

“No Y/N! I can’t! It’s like you’ve been falling into this pit of sadness for I don’t even know how many months now! I just want to know what happened. You’re supposed to trust me. I trust you. So why can’t you trust me?” she whispered sadly.

“3 months.” I whisper simply.

“What?” she asks.

And it was all coming out right now. Despite all your wishes and prayers to not to.

“I’ve been falling into a pit of sadness for three months. Ever since you started falling for McKay.” you whisper and it looks like the wheels are turning in her head, “I can’t trust you because I’m in love with you!”

You finally yell out, letting all the feelings that you’ve had pent up to finally come out. Lexi squeezed your hand lightly to let you know that she’ll be right here.

“What?” Cassie asks, her mouth open agape as she just stared.

“I always have been! And now it’s too late. I’m not angry with you and I don’t hate McKay. I’m just tired. I’m tired of feeling like I’m just there now when everything goes wrong in your life. When you and McKay fight or when you need someone to pick you up when you’re drunk. I’ve always been there for you and I’m tired of it not being enough.” and with that you got up and you left.

She didn’t try chasing after you. No one did. They all knew you needed your time and your space to regroup.

And just like that the non-related conjoined twins were separated. Neither of them talked or hung out. The only time they would see each other is passing in the hallway exchanging small smiles.

It was weird for the both of them. No small study sessions or move nights. Just them alone.

Cassie didn’t like not having Y/N there, but every time Y/N tried talking to her she would just avoid her.

During the time Y/N was gone she realized that Y/N was right. Lexi gave her a stern talking to. Lexi’s talk was basically her singing that one Taylor Swift song.

You know the one that goes like...

Dreaming about the day where you wake up and find that what you’re looking for has been here the whole time. Then something about short skirts and t-shirts, I don’t fucking know.

And that’s when Cassie knew. Cassie Howard was in love with Y/N Y/L/N.

Then the infamous night happened, where everything came pouring out...literally. It was raining outside.

Your phone buzzed with a text and your heart stopped at the name that popped up onto your phone.

With a text that read meet me outside. You looked outside your window and saw the raindrops that stained your window pane. And made out the small figure that is the blonde girl.

You grabbed a hoodie from your closet before running downstairs and to the middle of the street.

“Cassie! What are you doing? It is pouring!” you yell the hood covering your head.

You stepped closer to her throwing the hoodie you grabbed from your closet over her head. She was standing there wearing nothing, but a long sleeve shirt and jeans.

“You still care about me?” she asks barely above a whisper voice.

You let out a sigh, “Just because we stopped talking doesn’t mean I stopped caring.”

Out of nowhere Cassie pulled you closer to her by the waist placing her lips on yours. You didn’t kiss back at first, but it didn’t take you long to kiss her back. Your two lips moving in perfect motion, you only pulled away when you felt like you were gonna pass out.

“I love you. I always have and I’m sorry I took you for granted. And I’m sorry I didn’t see that you were right in front of me all along. I love you. I am so sorry-” she was about to go on, but you cut her off with a quicker kiss.

She smiles into the kiss before pulling away, “I love you so much, but this was very dramatic.” you whisper with a smile that matched Cassie’s.

She giggled lightly before pecking your nose.

#cassie howard #cassie howard imagine #cassie howard imagines #cassie howard x reader #cassie howard x fem reader

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wh6res · 3 years

Text

UP IN SMOKES — DOYOUNG

psych student! kdy | tw. college au, violence, a knife, GASLIGHTING, hallucination, psychosis, swearing, just pure manipulation, minor charac death, there's a court scene, this is a repost! | wc. 10k she a beast

life could’ve been simple;

you shouldn't have met kim doyoung.

what does a freshman in college hate the most other than the high-stress levels of moving into a new dorm? a shitty roomie and a smelly, moldy mattress. the girl you call roommate refuses to help move the mattress because it will ruin her new manicure. what a fucking classic.

"sounds like a 'you' problem. figure it out yourself, plain jane."

she said before heading out, annoyingly popping her bubblegum as she kicks a few of your scattered boxes by the front door. you roll your eyes; classes haven't even started yet, so why is she already making your life miserable? as much as you'd like to snap at her, you don't, merely glaring daggers at her back as she finally turns the corner of the hallway and disappears.

"bitch," you mutter under your breath.

you eye the abomination that is supposed to be your bed, cursing how you shouldn't have made a 15-minute pit stop to starbucks for a drink when you could've just bought one from the instant coffee vending machines in every corner of the hallway of this dorm building because if you didn't, maybe you could've beaten regina george wannabe from taking the better bed. sighing, you suck it up and start getting to work. life's full of shit, anyway; no point sulking.

moving a moldy mattress is easier than you thought, to say the least. you can't ask for help from the other freshmen you bumped into in the hallway because they, too, are under a huge amount of stress from the move and are busy getting their affairs in order. it was a good thing, though, that a committee was formed specifically for this day to help out the freshmen if they were to stumble upon problems or mishaps with moving in. they were all around the campus, and they prove to be way friendlier than your batch mates. since this morning, three people have already offered help in carrying your luggage — which you have politely declined.

"hey, uhm… is this the stall for the welcoming committee? oh, wait. i'm sorry, there's a sign right there —"ugh.

you mentally shut your eyes in humiliation. why do you have to be this bad, this awkward at communicating with strangers? why couldn't you be born like all those socialites who already (probably) got their contacts filled with new numbers on the first day of school or something?

"yeah, this is them — welcoming committee, i mean. how can i help you?" he smiles, sweet, radiating the epitome boy next door aura as he looks up at you from where he's sitting behind the stall. your eyes quickly land onto the name tag stuck on his varsity jacket before meeting his eyes again.

"i have an issue with my mattress. it has mold, you see..." your voice slowly trails, becoming quieter as you feel small under the weight of his piercing stare. oh, come on. he's just a guy with a beautiful face, woman the fuck up.

"really? let me see..."

he needn't finish rounding the stall when his nose is hit by the pungent smell brought forth by your mattress. frankly, you weren't that picky. you could've covered it with bedsheets and call it a day, but the odor is too strong to ignore. you mentally hope the smell didn't latch onto your clothes, especially not when someone so cute is around — what a bad first impression.

"oh, god!" he exclaims the moment he lays eyes on it, taking a step back. “now, that has to go. and you lugged it from the fourth floor?"

ah, yes. according to tradition in these dormitories, which you've only found out today, freshmen get the curse of climbing four flights of stairs up while the seniors strut into their rooms on the ground floor like the hallway is a goddamned runway.

"doyoung! help me carry these!"

someone calls his name as you both turn your head to spot a chestnut-haired girl clad in the same varsity jacket he's wearing. you grimace at the sight of her. for someone so small, she just had to volunteer to carry all those heavy bags. however, he doesn't move in front of you and brushes her off as if she doesn't look like she's carrying rocks over her shoulders. "i'm already helping someone else! go find taeyong or something. i'm sure that shit's loitering around here somewhere!"

"oh, it's okay, you can go help her. i'll just look for someone else —"

"nah, it's fine!" you try hard to school your face into indifference when you notice his gummy smile. "plus… trust me when i say no other person from the committee will help you with this. this shit smells like my roommate's sweaty basketball socks!"

you can't help the smile forming on your face as you help him carry the mattress off to the side of the hallway, the stinky thing leaning vertically against the wall and behind a huge terracotta plant pot. "don't worry, let's report it to student affairs so they'll get you a new one. congrats! you'll have to share beds with your new roommate tonight, freshie. it'd be a great ice breaker."

the universe truly hates you.

your expression must've been a dead give away because he's suddenly patting your shoulder, regarding you with utmost sympathy. "been there, done that. i hated taeyong, too, when i met him last year. still, for some mind fuck of a miracle, we've grown to be friends and developed a talent of not wanting to kill each other every two seconds."

"highly doubt i'd be friends with a regina george-level bitch, but thanks, anyway," you mutter under your breath. suddenly, you whip your head towards him after internalizing what he just said. "you met your roommate last year? you're a sophomore?"

he scoffs, leaning down to your height to lowly mutter against your ear as he eyes the lobby's front desk. "why? do i look like some 4th year who radiates 'don't touch me' energy?"

you feel the heat on your cheeks with how close he is, only releasing an exhale when he finally gets out of your personal space. "i'm kim doyoung. you've heard it from wendy earlier, but anyway — i'm a 2nd-year psych major."

"no way!" you exclaim, a little too excited. "i'm taking psych, too!"

"oh, you are? well, if you need anything or if you don't understand stuff…" he winks. "feel free to approach me anytime."

hmm… how sweet of him.

it was only hours later that you found out who kim doyoung is in your department during the acquaintance party. and for god's sake, you found out from your best friend who is a major in english lit and has never even seen the guy. "seriously, you didn't know he's a genius? i hear the professors call him a prodigy, girl! a fucking prodigy. if i were you, i'd ask for his help in every subject."

"you know i prefer keeping to myself. how'd i know stuff like that when i have no one to talk to in the psych dorms?" you look down, making the ice cubes in your drink clink against each other. "i didn't think he was this big shot or whatever. he looks normal, and everyone treats him normally."

"well, what do you expect?" she hisses, hitting your arm. "the other students don't want to make him feel alienated or something just because he's tons smarter than them. but anyway… the real question is…"

you roll your eyes when she pauses for effect, tentatively leaning closer to whisper under her breath.

"is he cute?"

you didn't want to answer her question, but he's been stuck in your head since he offered walking with you to the student affairs office. doyoung had smiled his cute gummy smile and had even ruffled your hair before leaving you for committee duties — saying he's cute would be an understatement.

"you have no idea."

for his first act;

he gains your trust.

fast forward to one year, many things have changed, but the only constant remaining is the handsome sophomore — who is now a 3rd-year, by the way — whom you've met on your first day. coursework has been pretty tough this year. instead of the content written in your textbook, your mind is plagued by the horrible twist of fate your best friend had encountered; she didn't have enemies. or so you thought.

she disappeared in the middle of christmas break last year. her beaten up body was found only a month later, in january, floating around the university's lake. happy fucking new year.

the first time she chose to spend the holidays with you instead of her family back in her hometown, and that happens? some rotten luck you both have. it's why you didn't put it past her family to hate your guts with strong convictions. it's okay. the feeling's mutual. after all, it had been your best friends' own family, the same ones who had been so willing to take you in when you got kicked out, that were so eager to pin you as the murderer of their child. all under the argument that you have been the last person seen with her.

oh, the things her mom said about you when she had stormed into the police station, red in the face, tears streaming down her cheeks..."i warned my baby not to hang out with that — that bitch. came straight out of a cursed family, that one. abusive dad, a nutjob mom. that bitch is a danger! probably got her dad's nasty temper and beat my baby to death! i want her on the electric chair!"

in those times, you once again realize this world is fucked up and cruel in every bit of its glory as you fought tooth and nail to defend yourself. but even then, they never believed you — the law will only favor the rich . the prosecution had been so sure it was you until a certain witness appeared and presented himself before the jury.

"do you swear to tell the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth?"

doyoung raises his right hand, fixing his stare straight at the judge. "i solemnly and sincerely declare that the evidence i shall give will be the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth."

"how long have you known the defendant?" the prosecutor asks, arms crossed in front of her chest as she paces in front of the witness stand.

the boy briefly meets your gaze, and it's enough to make his heart sink. doyoung can't bear seeing you in those grey overalls when he knows it himself. you're being accused of a crime you didn't commit. "i've known her for one year."

"how'd you meet?"

and the questions went on and on; your defense attorney isn't all too keen on winning the case and had never once yelled "objection!" in her seat, but what could you expect? all the evidence kept stacking against you, and some of those you knew were even fabricated. you've never felt this hopeless in your whole twenty years of living.

"what's the point in this, anyway?" doyoung snapped in the witness stand, fiercely glaring at the prosecutor. "how is my history — or lack thereof — with the defendant any relevant to the case? you're not even asking me about evidence nor what my statement is!"

"easy there," the prosecutor retaliates, jaw locked. "i have to first measure what exactly your relationship is with the defendant for us to think twice about your statement. who knows..." the prosecutor makes a grand gesture of turning her head in your direction, affixing you with a condescending stare. "she might've just hired you to say these things."

your attorney doesn't come to your aid.

"perjury isn't my thing."

the prosecutor seems to have taken offense by the tone of doyoung's voice, but he doesn't let her speak further. "the victim isn't all sunshine and rainbows, you know. she'd been a part of a sorority and one with quite a nasty reputation in the college, too. i have to say she made very poor decisions, ones i'm sure her family didn't even know about. you see, they take their oaths and pledges very seriously. the victim wanted out. they didn't like that."

"and you have evidence to support this claim?"

without a moment to waste, he digs around the front pocket of his jeans before proudly presenting a black usb between his slender fingers. "knock yourself out."

the professor calls your name, snapping you out of your reverie. this isn't the first time your mind had transported you back to that particular day in the courtroom, where doyoung had swooped in and saved you from a lifetime in prison. the whole ordeal had been so scary, so frightening that you remember everything vividly as if it had only happened yesterday.

the classroom is empty. even your social psych professor has long packed up his stuff and is already standing by the classroom door. damn. were you that out of it?

"i'm so sorry." you mutter under your breath monotonously as you walk past him and out the door without another word. this is bad, very bad. no one would help, much less lend their notes to someone charged with murder — especially of their very own best friend. whether you were innocent or not doesn't matter to the student body. you've been ostracized, gossips of your problematic family spreading like wildfire, and the ridiculous part is only a fourth of the gossips are true.

the damage is done.

at this point, you realize with a heavy heart that you have to face doyoung again sooner or later. you haven't talked to him at all since the start of the new school year, ignoring his lighthearted greetings in the hallways, rejecting his calls, ghosting his texts. you are afraid people would judge him harshly for hanging around you. frankly, you were embarrassed to ask any more favors from him with how much he's done for you already and the fact that he had seen you in such a state of vulnerability.

but you also didn't want to fail your subjects and lose the one thing holding your life together — your scholarship.

that is why you found yourself standing before him, in his favorite spot in the library tucked behind shelves upon shelves of books, next to the windows overlooking the empty football field. he's wearing black-rimmed glasses and is clad in the usual navy blue sweater as his head turns to and fro between a textbook and his notebook. the air had been so silent, you hear the aggressive scratches his pencil makes against the paper.

you feel a little hurt when he makes no move to acknowledge your presence, but you think back to what you have been doing and figured he has a right to act this way.

"hey, doyoung." your voice is meek, hesitant.

"if you're not here to explain nor give me an acceptable reason why you've been ignoring me for the last few months, then please get out of my sight. i'm busy, as you can tell." he is brutally honest, knocking down the remaining hope you have left of ever reconciling with him.

something within you snaps, the steady streams of tears running down your cheeks as you pinned your stare on doyoung's open pencil case lying on the table. you have nobody left. your family — father, specifically speaking — has disowned you for taking a course your heart wanted, and the one friend you have lies motionless in a white coffin buried six feet under the ground. you didn't want to lose doyoung, too, no matter what role he plays in your life.

"i'm sorry," your voice cracks. "life's been… fucking shitty, and i'm sure you of all people know what i've been through. i've thanked you before for — for what you did, and i'm thanking you again right now but — i'm sorry, i'm really —"

your voice cracks when you feel him pulling you into an embrace. you feel the tension in your body breaking loose as you crumble in his arms. all those months grieving and wallowing in self-pity took such a heavy toll that you can't help but tightly clutch the sides of his hoodie, scared he'll slip through your fingers.

one of his hands comes up to push your face against the crook of his neck, muffling your cries in the silent library. doyoung felt like a jerk for snapping at you the way he did. how inconsiderate can he be? however, he felt elated because you sought him out yourself and wanted his help of all people.

his eyebrow raises in amusement.

well, not that you have a choice, anyway.

it took you a few good minutes to calm down, cringing when you see the wet patch on doyoung's sweater because of your tears.

"why don't you tell me everything, hmm? i'll help you as much as i can."

you sheepishly look down, fiddling with your fingers as you sit across him, the open textbook and notebook before him long forgotten. "well, i've been so out of it lately? my mind's just a whole bloody mess and i can't focus on any of my subjects at all and if i can't, then i'll lose the scholarship and it's the only thing i have in my life right now —"

"hey," doyoung cuts you off, placing a warm hand against your forearm to calm you down. "you won't lose that scholarship. trust me, okay? why don't we arrange tutoring sessions and i'll even lend you some of my notes from last year. what do you think?"

"okay... thank you, doyoung."

"for the record, you have me in your life, too. i'll always be here for you."

in the first session, you woke up from your deep slumber with only 15 minutes to spare from the scheduled time, but thankfully, your tutor only lives one floor down with the rest of the 3rd-years. bringing nothing with you but a pen and a pad of paper, your textbooks were destroyed as some students from your batch thought it'd be fun to throw them into the lake to "honor" your friend.

you offer a small smile when taeyong opens the door, sporting an oversized shirt and track pants, eyes wide in shock when he sees you. "hi? can i help you?"

"hello! i'm here for doyoung. he's tutoring —"

"he doesn't live here anymore. his mom bought him a place outside the campus."

what?

"i'm sorry for disturbing you, then. do you by any chance know where he lives?"

that's weird. doyoung never mentioned he's already moved out. you feel a wee bit irritated that he forgot to tell you; it would've saved you the embarrassment of interacting with the varsity player. you weren't stupid, you can see the hints of repulsion in taeyong's eyes the moment he opened that door and saw you standing before him, no doubt thinking about: oh, look, it's the crazy murderer with a fucked up family standing in front of me.

he had shut the door in your face. you stood awkwardly for a good minute in the hallway until the door reopens, taeyong handing you a small piece of paper with doyoung's new address scribbled hurriedly in black ink. he doesn't give you a chance to thank him for he's already closed the door again without another word.

you opted walking to his place instead of catching a ride because the money you have on you is enough to buy yourself dinner. to say the least, the apartment building is mediocre, not too grand, nor is it too rundown. double-checking the floor level written on the paper before pushing the elevator's button, you then realize doyoung lives on the very top floor of the building.

the hallways are painted a boring brown. some acrylic number signs plastered on the doors are broken, hanging vertically with one screw left. it says on the paper he resides in room 720. taking the right hallway, you mentally count as you eye the mahogany doors. 718… 719… there it is!

when you raise a fist to start knocking on his door, there is a tinge of hesitation surging through you. perhaps being alone with a boy in his apartment is not the best setting for a girl like you should end up in, but this is doyoung we're talking about. if he had ill intentions for you, it would've manifested a long time ago. you shake your head, feeling bad for thinking of him that way as you slowly knock on his front door. not long after, it swings open, revealing the 3rd-year in a white shirt and boxers as he lazily dries his hair off with a small towel.

"you're late," is the first thing he says to you before spinning on his heel to disappear further into his humble abode.

"you didn't exactly inform me you've moved out of the dorms. so, whose fault is it?" you retaliate, inviting yourself in and closing the front door shut.

"whatever. let's get started!" he plops himself on the floor, coffee table filled with loose papers as he struggles to find a specific one amongst the mess. "i've already scanned, exported to pdf, and emailed you my notes. it should be in your inbox by now. anyway, answer this quiz i made so i know what i'll be working on."

"you didn't really have to send your notes, doyoung. i could've just read everything from the textbook," you sit down across from him because otherwise, you'll be too distracted to remember information.

a thought crosses his mind. with what textbook?

"i just think it's missing some essence. that's why i love reading over other psych books in the library for fun. be grateful, those notes are like my babies and i don't simply give them to anyone," he looks at you pointedly. "they've all been summarized and explained in layman's terms so you wouldn't have to spend grueling hours of reading and trying to make sense of the big words as i did — i know that's not the definition of 'fun' normally, but it is for me, and that's why i do it."

"okay, doyoung. you sound so defensive when there's nothing to be defensive about," you tease, feeling pleased with the hint of red on his cheeks as he averts his gaze from yours, muttering incoherent words under his breath.

you spent the following tuesdays, thursdays, and sundays like that; hours upon hours with no one but your tutor, laptops with tangled chargers, a printed copy of his babies, and a mountain pile of loose papers filled with the specialized quizzes doyoung makes to measure your progress. the location varies from a cafe or his flat. but in what you've gathered from the time you spent with him, doyoung's a homebody. cafe tutor sessions are rare, and he always complained about how "noisy" the atmosphere was — "i can't stand it."

but the conversation hadn't always been about academics.

sure, for the first few sessions, doyoung kept an image of professionalism and had heavily insisted on it — "it's for your learning experience!" — despite your lighthearted teasing. but as time passed and he eventually grew more comfortable in your presence, you find the strict 15-minute break he had initially imposed between 45 minutes of studying turned into hours of talking about whatever; how he likes his eggs in the morning, your favorite coffee brew, his favorite show, your strongest pet peeve.

and you wholly welcomed the change, not minding that it's practically dark out whenever you go back to your miserable dorm. you feel butterflies in your stomach whenever doyoung offers to walk you home but never had you taken his offer, still cautious of other people seeing you both together despite his constant reassurances. you've already thoroughly ruined your image. you didn't want to ruin his, too.

kdy the cute tutor, 2:14 pm —last day of midterms! & its all majors today —good luck —remember what i taught u —lets get ice cream after u cant say no

you shake your head bemusedly. his texting style is the most doyoung thing he does and it's as if you can hear him say these things to you in real life. too caught up in your own world, you fail to detect another student sitting next to you and had nearly fallen off your chair in shock when they spoke.

"why are your notes like that?"

you fight the urge to glare at the person, especially when you turn your head and see lee jeno looking at you in genuine curiosity. he's the only batchmate that treats you a wee bit nicer among the rest. although he isn't technically your friend, at least he doesn't look at you like you're a piece of bubblegum stuck under his shoe like all the others.

"what do you mean?"

"they're… the definitions are all jumbled up. where did you even get that?"

what? jumbled up? doyoung himself said these notes are a combination of most of the psychology books he had read last year concerning his subjects. how would it be jumbled up? then again, lee jeno was not tutored by the prodigy himself. maybe things are bound to seem "jumbled up" when information is too great to understand for a feeble mind.

just as you were about to claim these notes aren't yours, the professor has already waltzed into the classroom with a thick wad of papers — the exams. after one last concerned glance directed your way, jeno averts his gaze with a confused tilt of the head.

hours later, you walk out of the classroom with the biggest smile on your face. aced it, you thought. your hands feel numb with how much you wrote on the essay portion but it's worth it if it meant you get the full 25 points, which you no doubt will as it was a topic you surely tackled with doyoung. speaking of... he sure is a man of his word.

"what are you doing here?" you hiss, head ducked with hair framing your face as to not draw attention from the rest of the students filing out of the testing hall.

"i texted you that we're getting ice cream. remember?"

"i did. but i didn't remember agreeing."

he shoots you a comforting smile, planting his hands firmly on your shoulder. “i told you, y/n. i don't care if they all see us together, so what? we all know you didn't commit that crime and it wasn't your fault you were born into the family you had. i don't care about the trivial things, baby, so don't shy away from me, okay?"

how the fuck can you say 'no' when he's looking at you the way he is as he brushed a loose strand of hair behind your ear? doyoung's just so bewitching that he has you wrapped around his slender fingers. he seems pleased when you stumbled over your words as you come up with a reply, caught off guard by his bold gestures.

"i just — you, uhh — fine..." you gave in, rolling your eyes out of pretense.

he just had to call you 'baby' and erupt the butterflies in your stomach.

it had been doing that for the last few months now and it had only truly manifested today when he took you out for ice cream to celebrate the end of hell week. and since you didn't want to go back to your dorm yet, you asked if you guys can watch some movies in his house but it had simply become background noise to your heart-to-heart talks. and what better accompaniment than the classic, chicken and beer?

you listen to him drone on and on about the little realizations he had on some of his past lectures even when you barely understood anything he's saying. doyoung's so lucky to be extremely good at something he's so passionate about, talks about the human mind and the complexity of a person's behavior will never fail to make his eyes light up in interest.

he calls out your name.

your eyes snap open.

"why don't we get you home? it's past 10 and it's alright, stupid, you don't need to pretend to be interested in my psychological findings." he chuckled light-heartedly, stealing the can of the now room-temperature beer from your hands before you can protest.

"i wasn't dozing off, i swear."

"i caught you in the act. stop lying."

like all the other times he has you as his guest, doyoung once again offers to walk you home and you decline for the thousandth time. it really isn't that much of a long walk anyway. you don't see the need for him to go out of his way to secure your safety. plus, you were the one who insisted on hanging out in his house anyway. you weren't that thick-skinned to let him take you home, too.

"you're drunk!" he scolds.

“no, i’m not. i can perfectly handle myself."

"but —"

"bye!"

you feel a little guilty for shutting the door in his face. still, a minute longer of his persistence and you would've taken his offer. unfortunately for doyoung, you are one stubborn girl. only if you don't make brisk movements with your head, then you won't see doubles. you'll be fine, it's just a quick walk and it's not as if you're stupid enough to pass by deserted alleys.

but you had underestimated the divine prowess of your fucked up fate.

everything happened in a matter of three seconds; one, the blinding headlights illuminate your path from behind; two, you hear the loud honk, and as you turn around — three, the vehicle sends you rolling against the asphalt.

you should have taken the alleyways.

for his second act;

he alters your reality.

when you open your eyes, you thought you were dead and your spirit is wandering elsewhere — because you don't believe in trivial things like heaven and god — until an agitated doyoung comes into view. for a split second, you thought, is he dead, too?

"i'm not dead, you idiot." too dazed, you hardly register his anger. "i can perfectly handle myself, she said. i'm not drunk, she said. this wouldn't have happened if you had simply let me walk you home! you're damn fucking lucky you're alive and breathing right now!"

a person clears their throat.

"i don't think it wise to… nag at the patient the moment she wakes. don't you agree, sir?"

pink splotches on doyoung's cheek as he looks down, embarrassed at getting scolded as he stands closer to your bed. "i'm sorry, doc."

you didn't know when your vision cleared or when you started hearing normally again, but it was enough to find out what exactly had transpired on the very night of your tragic accident. a hit and run. fifty-fifty chance of surviving. doyoung getting a call from the hospital in the middle of the night —"they were trying to contact your dad, but he wasn't answering. i was the last person in your call history."

six months in a coma. but today, you wake… only to find out your world has crashed and burned.

"what do you mean i lost my scholarship?"

"baby, listen to me —"

"why did they take it away? is it because of my accident? i'm behind by one term only and i swear i can catch up. they need to let me back in the program. there must've been some mistake —"

"your gpa didn't reach the cut-off grade."

that can't be possible.

"but you tutored me!" you claim with conviction, pointing an accusatory finger at him until you groan, bowing in pain as you clutch your head.

doyoung springs into action. the chair's legs screech against the tiles as he jumps to your aid, ushering you gently back against the hospital bed despite your refusal. "you're not well. lay back down, please."

you don't hear a single word he says, not when you had lost something so crucial. "i put in the effort and learned everything you taught me... i aced those fucking mid-terms! i know i did!" you were on the brink of tearing up as doyoung settled himself in front of you.

"i… i actually saw your papers," his lips set in a thin, hard-line. "everything was all wrong, sweetheart. what happened to you? i tried reasoning with the professors, mentioned your state — you know, with your best friend dying — but they didn't relent. i'm sorry y/n. i'm so —"

gone. everything is gone. the money. the dorm. what if they ask you to pay the fees from last year? what if they ask you to pay the tuition fee for this year? you have no money, no family, no relatives. no one to help. who's even going to pay for the hospital fees?

you weren't able to process anything after that. not with the sudden news of your now revoked scholarship. doyoung pulls you in a tight hug. "i was a bad tutor," he says, snapping you out of it. "maybe i shouldn't have pushed you that hard to learn them. why were your answers even mixed up y/n? i thought you knew those topics already…"

he pulls away, observing your confused state as your eyes dart everywhere in the room. "what — how are they mixed up? i know i got them right. there has to be some mistake. you taught me those topics, remember?"

"i did... "he averts his gaze. "but i don't remember teaching them to you mixed up, darling. i think you did that all on your own."

"but… why would i mix up my answers? that's —"

"see, what i mean?" he cuts you off, raising a hand to give your cheek the most delicate caress. "you're not well, baby. you need to be treated, especially with how much you hit your head during the accident. don't worry, i'm here. we'll try asking if you can stay in the dorms at least until you find another place —"

"am i a charity case to you?"

oh, the surprise on the junior's face when you push him away as you pin him with a hard stare. you just don't get it. why is kim doyoung so adamant about helping you? in becoming your hero, even when you never asked him to be? if you let him help you this time around, that'll be the 3rd time he came to save your ass. it's not as if you're ungrateful. simply, you've had enough of his help. you don't know how a person like you, who literally has nothing, can return the favor to someone like doyoung.

"what are you saying —"

"i'm saying…" you fix him a hard stare. "you helping me out doesn't even benefit you in the slightest. so why do you do it?"

he pauses, staring at you with hesitance in his eyes as this seems to be the very first time you've truly seen him speechless. when doyoung opens his mouth, he mumbles, and you hardly make sense of what he said.

"do you really want to know why?"

you urge him on with an arched eyebrow, his softened tone creeping into your heart.

"you're someone special to me y/n. i don't know how or when i admitted it to myself, but you are, and it hurts me to see how shitty your luck is," he cracks a small grin, slowly settling back onto the hospital bed as he grabs your hand. "it's okay to seek help from others. it isn't a sign of vulnerability or weakness. i help you because i want to, and i'm more than willing to take care of you. will you let me?"

you're not blind. you've noticed the way he had slowly started coming closer as he continued to speak, hands held securely in his as he looked straight at your eyes then down at your lips. and so, you act in a way you know that will surely answer his question — with a kiss.

the man before you immediately reciprocates, overpowering your own eagerness as he curls the tips of his fingers into the roots of your hair. he pulls you close, cradling you against his chest. you can taste his desperation in the way his tongue dances against yours, the kiss transporting you into an alternate reality where your world revolves around doyoung and doyoung alone.

when he pulls away bleary-eyed, both of you ignore the thin strand of saliva connecting your lips. "how about you come live with me for the time being, my love?"

still high off his kiss and natural scent, you hardly mull over the question he asks you. "okay."

days later, after you've been discharged (he wanted to chip in for your hospital bills but you had given him a firm no), doyoung had been the one to show up at the dorm to collect all your things after leaving you in his apartment. the cutie had refused to simply drop you off and had deliberately accompanied you up the elevator, through the halls, and finally into his apartment.

"i'll be out for just a minute, sugarcube."

"oh, can you get take out?"

doyoung had smiled, playfully booping the tip of your nose. "no, because i'll be cooking for us tonight as a little celebration for you getting discharged. you'll love it; i'm making your favorite!"

it was funny how the night had been nothing but utter bliss. the foreign feeling of being taken care of sprouting in your chest as you watch him cooking from behind the counter. it felt… nice. but funny enough, as if doing a 360, you both had immediately gotten into an argument the next day.

"i don't see the need for skipping another day if i feel perfectly fine! i'll figure something out once we get there, doyoung, so can we just —"

"you' re not fine, babylove — hell, you got discharged yesterday! i'm not just about to let you back into the arena with those students. they've only grown more immature since your coma, love. i seriously don't want you near them."

"fine! then i won't talk to them. simple." you throw your hands up. "there. problem solved. now, can we please just go to uni? i need to talk to the dean and the head of student affairs, too —"

"i'm going to uni, not you."

maybe it had been the way he firmly stated his claim, the way his eyes pierced through your soul as if daring you to argue further with him that made you snap.

"i'm not a prisoner in this apartment, doyoung! don't treat me like i have the plague! i'm perfectly capable of taking care of myself — jesus christ, i've been doing it nearly half my fucking life!"

too caught up in your anger, you've failed to notice the tears pouring down his face as he sets his gaze on the floor.

"you're right," his voice cracks. "i shouldn't be pushy like that. i'm sorry. you just mean so much to me and i'm so scared of losing you again. with your coma — i just — it's like i was fighting a losing battle each day that passed when i saw you in that hospital bed. i've never felt so scared in my whole life and i hated myself for not being able to protect you that night."

his tears run like waterfalls, and when you step forward with your arms wide open, doyoung sobs harder as he pulls you against him. you hardly comprehend what he says as he spoke, shaking against your frail body as you felt his tears stain your blouse. "i'm sorry, i never should've dictated what you felt — i'm so sorry."

"no, it's okay. i was feeling a little lightheaded, anyway. i'll stay here and i can come back to school next semester, right? doyoung? just… please stop crying."

he lifts his head, staring at you with bloodshot eyes before giving your forehead a kiss. you let a relieved sigh escape your lips, melting into his warmth as you prop your chin on his shoulder. if you had only been more attentive, you would've seen the reflection of his wicked grin on the tabletops. too easy.

living with him became a blur after that incident. everything fell into a routine for the next four days as you spent the day watching netflix, eating, reading, sleeping. nothing felt fun anymore. but your peaceful life had ceased during the fifth night — the whispers, they woke you up. you can hear them from behind your door at night, and when you rouse awake, you see doyoung walking around the hallway from the tiny gap at the bottom of the door. you had sighed, falling back into your plush bed as you pray to god, he keeps it down.

but what he told you the next day rendered you speechless. "me, walking around the hallways? whispers?" he says, confused. "i was already asleep, love. knocked out cold the moment my body fell on the bed."

"but…"

he doesn't spare you a glance as he takes his sweet time skimming through his notes on the dining table, coffee in one hand. "maybe it's just the meds kicking in."

"no, surely it was real! i literally woke up in the middle of the night," you repeat. "it's okay if it was you, doyoung. i'm not mad."

he sets his coffee mug down a little too loud.

"well, you can't be mad at me, sugar, because like i said — it wasn't me," it doesn't take a genius to notice he's awfully cranky today. you observe him, dark half-moons under his eyes as he relentlessly reads his notes with instant coffee in one hand.

"you're just imagining things, okay? stop acting crazy."

for some reason, the way he had uttered certain words like 'imagining' and 'crazy' made you curl into your seat in embarrassment. he was right that your doctor did prescribe a generous amount of pills per day, but his tone made it feel off, made you feel like there was something wrong with you even when there wasn't…

right?

you didn't say a word after that and had hesitantly pecked him on the cheek before he left for school. with the amount of time you're with him, two things stood out to you — his keen sense of observation and his knack for reading people. you highly doubt he didn't notice a shift in your behavior but a part of you thinks it's just the stress talking. he is about to take his finals and had recently started on his research paper.

every psych student is required to present a paper in accordance with the department's annual theme. it could be anything from proposing a theory (if you dare) to constructing a well-developed psychology model. if you don't turn one in, you don't graduate — the paper's that important, and you've been bugging him for so long about sneaking a peek on what his study is about. but he always refused.

the next week came rolling around, and both of you had been spending every day together due to the semestral break. the arguments have significantly lessened, but your episodes — eventually, you started calling it that way because that's how doyoung labels it — have only gotten worse. you end up moving out of the guest room and into his. privacy be damned. the whispers stopped momentarily but what came next became your imminent downfall.

the first time you heard it, you thought you were dreaming. but the doorknob kept rattling aggressively even as you sat up. just as you climb off the bed, your half-asleep boyfriend asks where you're going.

"bathroom," you lied.

you were always the one to snort when it comes to the supernatural, claiming it's all bullshit. yet, as whatever outside continues to fight its way inside the room, the rattling progressing into loud bangs against the door, you're not so sure of your beliefs anymore. you're not crazy. nothing is wrong with you, and you're perfectly fine. this apartment is cursed, and you are going to prove that to doyoung.

grabbing your phone from the bedside table, you turn the flash on, pointing the camera at the door as you take a footage of the mad entity that has been playing games with you. a squeal escapes your lips when a particular bang! reverberates louder in the room than all the others. the phone slips your hand, falling onto the floorboards. you don't bother to retrieve it as you scramble to get yourself back under the blanket and into doyoung's comfortable warmth.

you snuggle yourself plush against his chest, shaking as you wrap your arms around his waist, inhaling his natural scent to anchor you back.

bang! bang! bang!

you didn't get a wink of sleep last night.

"can't the video wait? there's a new episode of start-up, and i want to watch it already!" he whines, shoving his face further on the throw pillow situated on your lap.

you giggle, shaking your head as you scroll through your gallery to find the video. i'm not imagining things. i'm not hallucinating. i'm not crazy. "here! watch... i'm telling you this apartment is haunted, and the ghost probably likes you, which is why it doesn't bother you —"

your lighthearted rambling cuts off when you notice no sound emitting from your phone. weird. you could've sworn you started recording right when the loud banging has already started. your heart drops upon the wary stare doyoung shoots you before he continues to watch the video.

no, no, no, no — please!

you quickly scoot over to his side, watching as the video unfolds before your very eyes. the shot was messy as the phone was handheld, not to mention you were panicking at the time. but the video is silent. not a single noise of a rattling doorknob or banging on the door can be heard through your phone's speakers.

"maybe — maybe you didn't turn the volume up?"

you hardly contain the mortification in your face when you realize the volume's at 100 already. and as if on cue, your squeal is heard in the video and the noise of the phone hitting the floor.

doyoung's silence shakes your whole being. as you kneel before him teary-eyed, your voice breaks. "i swear, i'm not crazy."

but at this point, you don't believe yourself anymore.

for his third and final act;

he triumphs.

his deprivation began in minuscule ripples.

it didn't take much effort on doyoung's end to convince you to stop studying for a year or two, at least, only until your hallucinations aren't as severe anymore. everyday felt like hell on earth as the fine line between what's real and what isn't has blurred over one too many times. in sheer paranoia of accidentally hurting him in his sleep, you moved out of his bedroom and had started sleeping in the guest room again — much to doyoung's frustration.

but he's a smart man, one that recognizes an opportunity amidst the hurdles thrown on his path.

"why does my door need a lock outside again?"

he approaches you, who’s sitting cross-legged on the bed, after screwing in the last of the screws that came with the new doorknob. doyoung is familiar with the look written on your face, has observed and studied you enough to navigate his way inside your pretty little head with ease.

he can't have you doubting him, can he?

"you know i'm all about protecting you, right?" he starts. you nodded. "i've been doing it for a year now, and i will continue to do so until you need me to. the world is a bad place, sweetheart, remember? your own best friend's mother tried framing you. your dad disowned you. you've been ostracized in the whole college... do you think i'm just like the rest of them, baby?"

doyoung has already mastered the perfect expression of a kicked-puppy, one that easily pulls at your heartstrings and has you cooing at him.

"no!" you say with conviction, reaching forward to thread your fingers through his. "i know you're different, not like any of them at all. i know you're only doing what's… best for me."

he ignores the underlying hesitance in your tone. that will be corrected, sooner or later.

doyoung tightens his hold as he kisses the back of your hand. such an innocent gesture — but such ill intentions.

"the outside lock helps me in protecting you, love. you don't need to worry about anything. just focus on getting better, alright? i'll keep the bad guys away from you."

it was during his first semester of senior year, a few months back, doyoung and a good few students of his batch had been granted the opportunity to intern for a mental hospital located near the edge of the city. he was supposed to decline the offer but you convinced him to take the spot. it had only been a two-week “job” yet it was enough for doyoung to conclude — he’d rather kill you than subject you to the horrors of what the patients have to go through in the loony bin.

eventually, the small ripples shift into unforgiving waves, dragging you into the depths as everything comes crashing down before your very own eyes.

it should have been like any other day inside the apartment. doyoung's already gone in the morning to attend classes. though not before setting a tray of your brunch on the nightstand, making sure to lock your door on his way out. he knew your nightmares and anxiety kept you up at night, resulting in longer hours of sleep during the day.

turns out, you moving out of his bedroom had been a blessing in disguise. coming home to an empty apartment has become his biggest fear yet, and you unconsciously found a solution for him. one that doesn’t have him fidgeting on his seat as he counts down the minutes ‘til he’s back by your side.

doyoung smiles unconsciously as he listens to his professor drone on and on in front of him — his mind at peace, knowing you're safe and sound in your little prison.

until he received a text that made his blood run cold.

ty, 11:34 am —im done.

meanwhile, you rouse awake once more to thunderous poundings against your bedroom door. oh no, you thought. it's happening again. this time, there'll be no doyoung barging into your room, half-asleep and hair messy, as he tries to calm you down. you throw the blankets over you as you sob, hugging your legs against your chest as you try to 'wake yourself up' from the hallucination.

the person outside calls for your name, the desperation in their tone alighting a new-found fear in your heart. you don't know what's real anymore. is this truly happening, or is it another hallucination your fucked up mind has conjured up?

"please! it's taeyong! y/n, can you hear me?"

taeyong?

slowly, your head peaks above the blanket, warily staring at the door. doyoung has warned you about these kinds of things, has practically ingrained in your mind that whoever comes looking for you will take you away from him. not to mention, doyoung slipped one time and said he isn’t friends with taeyong anymore.

the banging on the door progresses.

“are you in there? answer me! i can’t find the key!”

you don’t say anything, merely pushing the covers off your body as you keep your eyes fixed on the beating door. it looks like it’s about to pop out its hinges as taeyong relentlessly fights his way inside your room. what are you going to do? do you open the door? oh. right. you can’t do that on your own accord. the key is with doyoung and he isn’t in the apartment at the moment.

all your thoughts come to a halt when the boy outside sends the door flying open, finally breaking the lock with one powerful kick. you flinch back, his actions pushing you on your feet, wanting to place a maximum amount of distance from the intruder.

taeyong looks frantic, disheveled as he immediately notices your alarmed state. he approaches you cautiously, hands up to show his empty palms. “hey, hey… it’s just me, y/n. i’m not going to hurt you. i’m not the enemy here.”

“doyoung doesn’t know you’re here, does he?”

the look of surprise on his face is an answer in itself. for someone doyoung had proudly claimed to have “broken” you’re still quite quick to catch up on things, taeyong observed. and he doesn’t know what to feel about it — pity? guilt?

“that’s not important!” he claims, boldly surging forward to grasp your shoulders with a firm grip. taeyong felt his heart dropping when you flinch under his grasp.

“listen to me. we need to get you out of here. doyoung isn’t — he isn’t everything you thought he is!” he can’t help but raise his voice, panic surging through him because there’s not much time left and you aren’t exactly cooperating. you’ve been trying to shrug off his hold the whole time.

“do you think he actually loves you?”

“he does! stop saying bullshit!”

“doyoung never loved anyone and you want to know why? because he’s too in love with his research to care for anything else!” taeyong felt bad to have been so direct, especially when he sees the tears now falling freely down your cheeks. “listen to me, y/n! i’m not the enemy! if there’s anyone you should be pushing away, it’s doyoung! he turned you into his lab rat! you are nothing but a variable in his study! don’t you get it?”

taeyong grabs a firm but gentle hold of your head, trying to make you look at him straight in the eye for the gravity of what he’s about to say to you.

“doyoung had his eye on you since sophomore year. i told him this was a bad idea and that he should change the topic of the research and he was. fucking hell, he was about to scrap the whole thing until your bestfriend died and did you know what that psycho told me? that it was a sign for him to continue the research! and i’ve been pestering him so much that he moved out because he claimed i was going to get in the way of his discovery.

tell you what, if you can tell me right here, right now, that he has mentioned anything — anything at all — about his study to you then everything i’m saying is a lie.”

you have asked doyoung for the longest time about that research but the answers have always been the same. “not yet, my love. it’s not time for it to be seen with your eyes. soon, okay?”

with a voice not louder than a whisper, you ask. “what… what’s his research about?”

you fail to see the sorry look on taeyong’s face. “in psychology, they say a person only develops psychosis mainly through genetics or drugs. although you’re technically already a worthy “lab rat” considering your mom and upbringing, he wanted to expand the external factors of what causes the disorder — grief, grades, toxic family relations…”

you hear a ringing in your ear and a sudden urge to throw up. only, you didn’t have anything to hurl because your brunch remains untouched on your bedside.

“but he hadn’t been successful. and that’s… that’s where i came along. doyoung thought the medications he’s been giving you isn’t doing what he wanted it to and he knew he needed a little push. i was… i gave him that push. remember the whispers, the banging on the door at night? it was all me. he made me do it. you know what that means, right? you’re not crazy. you don’t need to stay here cooped up like some kind of pet, believing all his lies as if it’s written in a fucking bible —”

he stops. and if he hadn’t, you wouldn’t’ve heard the familiar beeps of the front door’s automated lock going off. doyoung’s home.

in lightning speed, taeyong has you sheltered behind him, throwing his warm coat over you in the process, hoping to give the smallest comfort amidst the chaos that’s about to erupt. there’s no point in pretending or hiding — one look at that lock and his crazy friend would know something’s off.

taeyong feels you flinching behind him with every heavy footstep against the floorboards as doyoung wastes no time in getting to your room. and when he finally appears, hands braced against the door frame, you’ve never been this scared your whole life. his eyes are drawn into slits, fixated on taeyong alone. “how fucking dare you?”

“it’s over, doyoung. give it up or you wouldn’t have to suffer a longer sentence than you’ll already get.” taeyong tried with his whole being to appear intimidating.

“what’re you saying, yong? i meant, how fucking dare you barge in here and disturb my girlfriend in her sleep? that’s not very nice of you…” doyoung sports a disarming gummy smile as he approaches, hand outstretched and beckoning towards you. “c’mere, baby. i don’t think you’ve eaten lunch yet?”

“drop the fucking act, you psycho!”

“what act?” doyoung tilts his head innocently, gaze shifting from taeyong’s and yours, who keeps peeking from over his ex-friend’s shoulder. luring you out is a piece of cake unless taeyong decides to make things a wee bit more complicated, doyoung thought. “i’m just concerned for my darl —”

“we’re leaving.” taeyong cuts him off, breaking eye contact as he places a firm grip around your wrist. he pulls you towards him, farther away from your supposed lover as he tries walking past doyoung.

but the said man pushes taeyong back with a humorless smile on his face. “and who told you that you can do that?”

a pregnant silence befalls the room as the two men size each other up. they regard each other with such hostility, you can't help but unconsciously fist the back of taeyong's sweater in nervousness, prompting the man to turn his head over his shoulder for a swift second to check up on you.

but a second is all that doyoung needed to deliver the first kick towards taeyong's legs, throwing him off his balance. if it was one thing doyoung knew, is that he needed to eliminate taeyong's agility all together if he wants to win against him.

but taeyong isn't one to back down. the moment doyoung straddles him on the floor, with a fist raised to throw a punch, taeyong grunts as he rolls them around. doyoung now receiving taeyong's rain of fists as he yells. "fuck you! you manipulative asshole!"

you sat on the corner, horrified of the scene happening before you. you've never seen doyoung this way. he has always been your sweet, caring bunny, but after everything taeyong said, you aren't so sure you even know the man you've been living with.

"everything i did, i did it for her!" you flinch at the sound of bones breaking as doyoung kicked taeyong's ribs. "she had nothing to lose! i saved her!"

the door is open, you noticed. wide-open and inviting you to make a run for it. and you would have made a run for it... but taeyong. you can't leave him behind, not when he lays there bloody and grunting in pain as doyoung lets his anger take over him. so, as stupid as may be, you did it. you had to.

"you didn't save me," you say, schooling your face into indifference as doyoung whips around, forgetting about taeyong in the bat of an eye. "you caged me in here, treated me like there's something wrong with me, gaslighted me into believing everything you said! and... what did you say? 'saved me'? you made me go through hell!"

the whole time, taeyong tries his hardest to stand upright, but his broken ribs don't allow him to. the pain too great that he had no choice but to crawl instead, arms pulling his weight as he drags himself across the floorboards, desperately trying to get doyoung's attention back on him even if it meant getting beaten to death.

meanwhile, he had his eyes trained on you the whole time you spoke, sobbing as you walk backward in fear as doyoung approached you with a dark glint in his eye. he doesn't like what you're saying; that much is very clear. he wanted to yell at you, to scream of your ungratefulness despite his constant care but instead, he says.

"i thought we were making progress, baby. i guess i have to drill everything in your brain again. you're not okay, but you will be after i treat you."

you try to fight the urge to look at taeyong as he finds his strength, silently rising up from the floor to ambush doyoung while he's so busy preaching about you.

"what i said is true, baby. do you actually think this scum over here is doing this to save you? do you actually believe everything he said? i've been here since day-1, my love. literally. and have i ever let you down? no. everything i'm doing is for us. even this damned research!"

taeyong surges forward to put him in a chokehold, but everything happened so fast, and the next thing you knew —

"did you actually think i'd fall for that?"

you didn't know the sound of a knife cutting through flesh could sound that loud, but nothing could beat the strained gasp that tumbled through taeyong's lips as he shakily held the knife pierced through his heart. you would've been concerned about how doyoung got it so accurate in one go or where the knife even came from. but you were too busy screaming, collapsing against the wall as you let out a broken sob.

"no," you mutter. "no, no, no..."

you can't bear to avert your eyes from taeyong as he lies dying before you. the look of fear in his eyes would forever be ingrained in your mind, and no amount of brainwashing or gaslighting would ever make you forget.

doyoung killed him. you lost.

the knife clatters loudly on the floor as he slowly turns around as if he himself has yet to register what he did. you didn't know what to expect from doyoung's reaction but certainly not the eerie smile that starts spreading on his face.

"now... how about that lunch, baby?"

✉ : a repost no one asked but i respectfully dont give a fuck <3

#hmu if i missed a warning #yandere doyoung #yandere kpop #yandere nct #yandere nct 127 #tw swearing #tw manipulation #tw violence #tw knife

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iwaisa · 3 years

Text

request. Ok so its literally 1am and I cant sleep and my brain literally doesn't allow me to sleep🤩So I hope it's okay if I requests something because I want to distract me for a while hehe Can you maybe do some hc with koganegawa( he is so underrated T_T ), Tendou and Bokuto having their first time with the reader? Pwetty pleashhh - anon

a/n. hi angel ! so sorry this took a while to write, i’ve been so swamped with the holidays, but i hope you enjoy this ! hopefully you’re getting enough sleep too <3

first times with koganegawa, tendou, and bokuto

- pairings. koganegawa, tendou, and bokuto x gender neutral reader

- genre. nsfw ! (all characters are in their third year, koganegawa is aged up.)

- warnings. dry humping, riding, overstimulation, oral, penetrative sex, aftercare in bokuto’s

- comments and reblogs are greatly appreciated if you liked it !

► now shuffling…

with koganegawa, it would be a spur-of-the-moment decision

it would start with some chaste kisses here and there until he pulls you onto his lap

the two of you would be making out sloppily, his kisses occasionally moving down the column of your throat and to your collarbone

his hands subconsciously begin roaming around your body, squeezing the flesh of your ass and thighs

he stops instantly as you let out a lewd moan, watching as you quickly slapping a hand over your mouth

koganegawa is just awestruck, his eyes half-lidded as he looks up into yours, where you’re attempting to avert your gaze under his unwavering stare

there’s an awkward tension in the air, until he simply looks down at the new bulge in his pants

literally… all this man says is “oh. i’m turned on.”

PLEASE JSDFIWEHW

you’d be so embarrassed but he’s just so horny he doesn’t even care about it anymore

he really wants to hear you make those noises again

his giant hands grasp onto your hips, attempting to get some friction to help his growing erection

he would be so close to cumming in his pants from dry humping until he finally speaks up, asking if the two of you can go further than kissing

… he doesn’t even want to say sex please he’s still immature and inexperienced as a third-year.

you nod, allowing him to push your back down onto the couch

he’s so nervous and so fidgety, he’ll probably ask you to guide him

he so excited nonetheless because this is the first time he’s ever done this and he’s so excited to explore your body

he would probably start off slow and gentle, almost to the point where it’s painful for you because he’s going way too slow

but as soon as he begins to get the hang of it, he picks up the pace

his eyes are constantly searching your face for any hints of pain, and he absolutely loves hearing the noises you make

he’d probably cum embarrassingly fast during his first time, but then as soon as he’s over the overstimulation, he’ll ask to go again in a different position.

tendou is so nervous to initiate anything

he’s thought about it before, and there are definitely times where he’s popped a boner around you but had to run elsewhere to relieve it lol

he’d hate to make you uncomfortable, so he’d wait until you bring something up

the two of you are cuddling on your bed, with you laying atop him

he can’t get up to use the restroom since you’re laying on him, but he desperately needs to because, with the way you keep squirming around, your crotch occasionally brushing against his lower region, he won’t be able to hold himself back

he accidentally lets out a moan as your crotch makes direct contact with his dick, and you look up immediately to a very flustered tendou

he’d try to laugh it off, saying how he was just dreaming, but he knows that you know

you initiate him in a kiss, maneuvering so that you’re straddling him now

his hands grip and knead the flesh of your thighs and ass, and you break away from the kiss to ask if he would like to go further

he can’t help but nod enthusiastically, quickly stuttering out an apology for being so needy, to which you dismiss

he swallows his gasps as your hands begin roaming, quickly moving to pull down his joggers

it would start off with slow foreplay, probably making each other cum from oral first before moving on to having actual penetrative sex

he doesn’t mind though, since he actually prefers slow, romantic sex above anything else

as soon as he makes you cum on his fingers and tongue alone, he’s practically raring to enter you already

his eyes will never once leave your face, only occasionally checking to make sure everything looks alright down there

he’s also searching for any pain, ensuring that you’re feeling just as amazing as he is

he gets sort of carried away and begins thrusting into you at a pace that makes your head spin, but he will definitely slow down if you say anything

he’ll cradle you as he’s cumming, pressing his lips to yours in an attempt to muffle his loud moans

he will definitely make sure you cum first, and he’ll deal with the overstimulation so you can cum with him

his favourite thing above all else is kissing during sex - he just loves kissing you in general and the romantic aspect of it.

bokuto is like koganegawa, where he announces each time he’s turned on

he never means anything by it, he’s just cracking a joke and trying to play off the embarrassment of getting a hard-on when he sees you do anything lol

however, he never expects anything of you, and if you’re uncomfortable he’d make a trip to the bathroom to get rid of it immediately

however, he’s completely taken aback once you engage him in a kiss, muttering that you want him to take you already

he thinks you’re joking still, so he’d definitely joke around back without realizing you’re actually serious

when you reach down and cup his boner through his sweats, he automatically turns into a mumbling, flustered mess

he just freezes up, letting you take control by pulling him along to your bedroom

he’s also another guy who would love slow, sensual sex, but he’d probably be way too excited his first time

he’s quick to strip himself of his clothes and pin you down onto the bed, kissing down your body towards your sex

he loves giving oral, but he never expects anything in return

of course, he loves when you suck him off, but like i said, he’s a pleasure dom and he’d never ask you to do anything

king of ‘sit back and let me please you’

once the two of you have explored each other’s bodies for the first time, he begins growing nervous

what if he sucks at it? he certainly doesn’t want to go into emo mode mid-sex, but what if you don’t feel good?

you would probably have to take initiative and ride him instead of being in missionary because he’s so nervous

however, he absolutely loves having you ride him, so he absolutely doesn’t complain

his back will be against the headboard, his lips marking up your neck and anything he can reach as his hands desperately knead your hips and ass

his hands roam A LOT, and he just loves running them up and down your body as he watches you with a blown-out expression as you bounce on his dick

he’d probably begin to lose control as he’s on the brink of his release, so he’ll anchor you to his body as he digs his heels into the bed, quickly thrusting up into you

he’d try to watch your face as you cum, but he ultimately can’t because he’s so lost in the pleasure and he can’t focus on anything as he cums for the first time from someone else

he’s the king of aftercare. he’d be cracking light-hearted jokes, cleaning you up with a towel, and he’d probably ask you to take a bath with him afterward.

smut taglist. @otsut-writing @ash-writes-things @humanitysbiggestsimp

#koganegawa x reader #koganegawa kanji #kanji koganegawa #koganegawa smut #tendou x reader #tendou satori #satori tendou #tendou smut #bokuto x reader #bokuto koutarou #koutarou bokuto #bokuto smut #haikyuu smut #haikyuu!! smut #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu!! x reader #haikyuu!!#haikyuu

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alreadyblondenow · 3 years

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First cum, first serve

▸ Jaemin x reader (Ex Jaemin) ▸ 1,922k words ▸ Smut, Smut, Fluff ▸ Unprotected sex, slight nipple play, overstimulation, rough sex, choking, covering of mouth, sucking of fingers, swearing ▸ Requested and part of B’s giving back event, Ho Ho Ho?! See anon request message at the end of this drabble.

(If you read Second Star to the Right, this is their second life)

Christmas season, mall hours, and last minute Christmas shopping for your family never went well every damn year. The sound of children crying because their parents don’t want to buy them toys gives you a massive headache, plus your mother is nagging you to go buy her favorite fruit cake through the phone, while your boss kept sending you messages while you’re on call.

It was really crowded but your mother has her own way of making you focus on her annoying voice through the phone that you didn't see where you’re going now, you just kept on walking straight, and bumps onto someone so hard that your phone fell on the floor.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean it-“ he hands you your phone and smiled so sweetly at you.

“Hi, Jaem- Sorry about that. Fuck, you know how my mom can be so annoying during the holidays. I’m just on my way to her favorite bakery to buy her a fruit cake”

“Oh well, what a coincidence I’m sorry but I just bought the last one” he raises the bag and teased you. 'Fuck' you murmured, now you have to go to the other side of town just to check if the fruit cake is still available there. “Don’t worry, I can give you this cake in one condition” you looked at him and raised your eyebrow at him. “If you can make me cum before you do, then I’ll gladly give you this cake” he smirked, and you can’t believe what you’re hearing right now. You scoffed and let out an awkward laugh but you know that he’s serious.

This man in front of you left you during your college years. And now that you haven’t seen each other for years he’s asking to have sex with you. “You’re serious? You’re really asking me to have sex with you, on Christmas eve?”

“It’s cold and your hot” he smiled proudly at you and showed you the bag again.

After a few rounds at the mall, you finally said yes to his offer and went straight to his apartment. The drive to his apartment was surprisingly peaceful but the sexual tension between you, the fruit cake, and Jaemin were funny. “I can't believe I said yes to this” his apartment is nice and neat, you can’t believe that he stayed single over the years after he broke up with you.

“I missed you,” he said coldly and handed you a glass of wine as you sat comfortably on his big couch.

“You should’ve said that earlier before you asked me to have sex with you first,” he sat near you with a glass of wine in his hand.

“Are you really doing this for the fruit cake or you missed me too?” he bats his long eyelashes to you and smiled oh so handsomely. He never changed, he’s still the sweet talker between you two.

“You left me, remember?”

“And I’m sorry” he puts both of your glasses on the coffee table and made you sat on his lap. Legs on both sides of his while his cold hands creep under your sweater like he’s shy to touch you like how he used to.

“We need rules before we do this,” you said, leaning close to him and putting your arm around his neck.

“Psh. You and your rules-fine, whatever you want” he waits for your terms before he says his.

“No kissing-“ but he just did after you told him not to and it completely shocked you. “On the lips- That’s cheating. I mean it, no kissing. Don’t do it again or I’ll leave” you said sternly, but to honest you missed those lips.

“I just did that because I know I can’t do it later. Anyway, my turn. No begging for me to stop, take everything I give you”

“I can do that” he scoffed, “okay, next, condoms-“

“What?! No no. We haven’t fucked in ages and you want me to use condoms now? Seriously?” He protests. “Are you on pill?” He added.

“No” you lied.

“I’ll pull out then. We fucked for almost five years, haven’t I proven anything to you?” his lips made contact with your neck which felt heavenly good.

“Breaking the first rule, huh?” you teased him but you don't want him to stop.

“You said lips silly” he carries you effortlessly to his bedroom while he continues to kiss your neck like it's your lips. Sucking, biting, and licking it as you welcome the feeling of getting kissed by Jaemin again. He placed you gently in his bed and removed his dress shirt immediately and watch him remove his clothes. You did the same thing until you’re only wearing your matching underwear and freezing already but soon, the heat that Jaemin shares with you spread all over your body in an instant when he situates himself in between your legs.

“Still cold?”

“No. Your body is warm” he chuckles low and kissed you again on your neck, his hands roam freely on your body like you’re still his. He looked at you straight in your eyes, touched your lips like he always wanted to kiss them again, but he can’t. So instead, he diverts his attention and kissed the valley between your boobs so softly while his hands brush on your nipples gently which makes your back arch. He removes your panties as you pant and breathe heavily, spreading your legs and hooking them around Jaemin’s body.

“Chill” he chuckles and proceeds to remove your bra. It’s obvious that he’s taking his time because after this things will be unclear for the both of you again. He cups your boobs while kissing your neck, bodies grinding on each other, his cock brushing on your very wet slit.

A lot has happened after you two broke up but he has to admit... it’s still you all this time. When you felt his tip go inside you, you arch your back in an instant and the memories of you and Jaemin fucking in your dorm late at night flashes back like a movie playing in your head. You smile at that thought, “you haven’t changed. You still make me crazy with your girth”

He thrust slow and deep inside you making you choke and squirm, “is that so? You haven’t either. You still make the nicest moans” he sucks your nipple, kisses it, and licks over and over again while he thrust deep inside you.

Then he gave you a piercing thrust that made you open your eyes. He’s starting to become rough, you notice. His hand kept your arms above your head while the other grips on your neck and put enough pressure to choke you. His thumb brushes on your lips like he’s asking permission to kiss it but, “fuck! Keep going-don’t stop” his hips snap on you upon your requests that the sounds of skin slapping surround his room.

When he felt you clench and unclench around him, he smiled and covers your mouth because he knew, you will moan loudly. He did not do it for the sake of his neighbors, he did it because he used to do it back then in college, so your roommates will not hear you and you love it. You love the pressure he puts on his hand as his thrust became quicker than before, harder than before, and you watch him do it oh so handsomely on top of you. When you’re finally on the edge he slowed down and watched you whine underneath him, teasing you with a smile and putting two fingers inside your mouth that you suck without hesitation.

“You still remember” he smiles and kisses you on your cheek.

“Yes...and fuck why did you slow down?” you moan out, still catching every slow thrust he gives you.

“So is this it? I won then?” he smirks and puts your right nipple in his mouth.

“Keep your fucking cake and make me cum” You’re on edge again and that's because of his tongue.

“Alright alright so needy” he grips your waist and thrust harder, faster, and whispered sweet things beside your ear.... that hurt your feelings, but you’re about to cum so you let go and let yourself shiver underneath him, moaning and pushing him away as he fucks you through your orgasm.

“No. Cum one more time” requests as he catches his own release and slowing down again to take his time and overstimulated you further.

“Seriously I can't take it anymore” you whine and you feel him pull away from your body to look at how your pussy takes his cock so well and spits on it so it will slide smoothly. He returns to his previous position near your face and kissed your chin so close to your lips that it almost touched.

“You didn't have to spit on it, I'm so wet- ugh you make me crazy,” you said, completely overstimulated and trying to get out from his delicious thrust.

“I told you I missed you right? I used to that to you back then" he groans, "We don’t get to do this every day. Like we used to” he teases, and finally. Fucking finally he pulls out, pumps his cock, and lets his cum paint your stomach. He quickly grabs a tissue on his bedside table and wipes your sensitive body before he lays beside you.

Heavy breaths now surround the room as you and Jaemin try to calm down from cumming so good. He reached for your body and kissed your chin again like he can’t get enough of you. “Don’t kiss me” you push him away.

“Right. I’m so sorry, I shouldn’t have done-“

“That’s not what I mean Jaem, I’m still sensitive give me a few minutes. H-hug me it's cold”

He smiled so big, flashing those perfect pearly whites and covers you with his very thick blanket and cuddled under it. For the next few minutes, you and Jaemin talked about the sex, while his hand plays with your boobs while he listens to you talk, brushing cold fingers on your hard nipples and just enjoying his time left with you. This moment... it’s like you two never broke up. You used to be so close like this after a good fuck back in your college days. Giggling in bed while you can’t keep your hands from each other.

“I should go” you kiss his chest before you get up from your comfort and look for your clothes. He wanted you to stay of course, but your family is waiting and it’s Christmas eve. He watched you dress up again, savoring the moment of you being inside this cold apartment of his.

“When will I see you again?” He rests his forehead on yours and sways you from left and right. Just one last moment before you go. “I’m sorry I left you. Is it obvious that I’m completely regretting it? You must be making fun of me now” he says, keeping you close still.

“No” you whispered, “it happened a long time ago Jaem”

“Will you give me another chance if I say let’s try again?”

You nod without hesitation and kissed him on the lips. Finally. “We can happen again, sure, but not like this. Do you understand me?”

He nods and kissed your forehead. At least it’s not goodbye for tonight. “I have to go, my mom is waiting for this fucking fruit cake” you both chuckled but it’s obvious that you don’t want to leave either.

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Dear Anon, thank you for requesting a simple request but I made it complicated :(( I hope this drabble still satisfies you. It may not be first Christmas eve together, but it’s first Christmas eve again, together. huhu thank you so much!

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