#compassionate reminders | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

moonlit-positivity · 4 months

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How to recognize when you need to set a boundary

Physical signs of your body telling you "no":

Bile in your throat

Panic

freeze response aka frozen or paralyzed w fear

Heart paced real fast

Anxiety

Unsettled stomach/gut feeling

Head fuzzy

Head & chest feels tight

Face might scrunch up in disgust/disbelief/pain etc

"ick" or "ew"

fainting or feeling weak as a result

crying

feeling like hurting yourself

cheeks hot, face flushed (embarrassment out of fear or humiliation)

fight/flight/freeze/fawn response gets triggered

body feels "charged" or "activated"

wanting to yell or shout back

wanting to run away

wanting to hide

wanting to stuff yourself with food/substances/alcohol etc to numb the pain

heart feels heavy or pounds at awkward intervals

not being able to eat

head shakes "no"

backing away

asking or screaming for help

feeling scared

feeling "on alert"

not knowing what to say

arms protecting yourself

not being able to move

Emotional signs that you are not safe:

Unsettling environment

Fawning aka "going with what they want" even if you don't feel good about it

Uncomfortable

Knowing the other person doesn't like it when you express things different from their own beliefs

Knowing if you spoke up you would be either mocked or downplayed or told you're being too sensitive

Being told you're "disrespectful" or "not allowed" to talk back or disagree in any way

Being told you're too chicken or being forced to feel dumb or stupid if you don't join in

Being openly mocked or talked about by the whole group

Expressing a concern and they get mad at you for being mad at them

You're always the one in the wrong even when you were the one being hurt

They use grandiose words and phrases to assert dominance

"walking on eggshells"

They continue to do the things you asked them to stop doing even after countless times asking them

They don't care about how you feel

They make no effort to acknowledge your feelings or acknowledge how their behavior is affecting you

They force you to participate in drugs/alcohol

They hold their power and good deeds they have done for you over your head and threaten to stop helping or support you or even take back what they have given you

They are physically aggressive/ violent

Rage

Rage during substance use

Touching you without asking

Downplaying anything you need as not important

What to do:

Take a deep breath

Take your time figuring it out

Remind yourself this isn't your fault

Stay focused on the behavior- because they WILL try to detract from it & turn it around on you

Gather your resources

Consider leaving or cutting contact

Consider therapy or online support groups to help yourself breathe and find safer spaces for yourself

Have an exit plan

Do not engage with the arguments & emotional bait

Cultivate your privacy

Cultivate your security

Cultivate yourself a safe space

Prepare yourself for the backlash

Ask someone safe to go with you

Call someone safe and ask them to stay on the phone with you if you do not feel safe

Self defense tools like pepper spray & brass knuckles

Know you're worth the exit

Take yourself seriously when they dont

Honor the gut feelings

Restore faith in your judgement

Honor your voice

Honor your body

Honor your "no"

Ask for a pause- "I need a break."

Ask for clarity- "Can you clarify that?"

Ask what their intentions are- "Are you being helpful or hurtful?"

Bring attention to the behavior and how it's making you feel- "I'm not comfortable with the way you're ignoring my concerns."

Make direct eye contact & deepen your voice- "You need to stop."

Do not apologize

🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸

Hope this helps!

🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸

#recovery #ptsd #trauma #boundaries #mental health #healing #bpd #positivity #how to say no #setting boundaries #communication #relationships #toxic relationships #toxic friendships #toxic family #reminders #suggestions #compassionate reminders

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oliverinaestheticplaces · 19 days

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Stinky Bear Motivation ✨❤️

Fear needs to be met with comfort and safety. Anxiety is all about fear. Define the fear, put a name to your worries, and then meet yourself with comfort and make a safety plan for what could possibly go wrong.

You deserve to be comforted through the fears! Feel the fear and snuggle it anyway!

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transcendragon · 1 month

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There Is Beauty In Small Things - another gentle reminder with a dragon. A very, very tiny dragon

My original art made in procreate, image description in alt text

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crisishauntline · 3 months

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I have got to learn how to stop punishing my body with short-term dopamine fixes every time I experience anxiety. At this point, my nervous and digestive systems can no longer handle the consequences of over-/under-eating, staying up all night, and not exercising or going outside all day. Not only do I feel even worse while the problem triggering my anxiety persists, I also have less capacity to feel joy or relief if/when the stressor actually gets resolved.

I deserve rest, nutritious food, water, movement, and fresh air even when I am sad, overwhelmed, unproductive, or angry with myself. Even when I “waste” a day due to a mistake, maladaptive coping mechanism, or simple human limitation, I still deserve a fighting chance at making the next day a better one.

#mental health #self compassion #compassionate reminders #affirmations #self care #personal

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diaryofanenchantedprincess · 2 months

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Self compassion is the antidote.

Whenever you’re feeling down, when you’re feeling ashamed especially- be compassionate to yourself. When you’re having a hard day, do something with the mindset that being kind and gentle and loving to yourself is what will help you. You deserve that kindness. You deserve to feel good.

Do one thing as an act of service for yourself. If you want to do more and fill the day with self care activities- please do. But if you’re only able to manage one thing, please do it. It’s different for everyone. It can be getting a scoop of ice cream. Walking outside for 10 minutes. Laying down under the blankets with your stuffed toy. A guided breathing exercise. Simply sitting down and observing nature. Anything.

Whatever it is- make sure it’s something mindful and not something that distracts you like watching tv or scrolling on your phone. For me- it’s making a cup of hot chocolate.

Hot chocolate has never failed me.

I simply boil cubes of 70% dark chocolate in some milk, and while I’m humming (I make myself hum a tune no matter what mood I’m in), I keep stirring without letting the milk come to a boil and when it’s reached that creamy, luscious consistency, I take it off the heat, pour into my pink mug and top it off with some mini marshmallows and shaved dark chocolate. Sometimes I’ll omit the marshmallows and put in a spoon of vanilla ice cream and gently stir. I’ll watch the ice cream melt into little snowy swirls on top of my beautiful hot chocolate and that first little sip- I swear- feels like it reaches my entire nervous system and calms it down. Like a wave of relief and relaxation washing over me.

In my darkest moments, when I feel like I’m so deep in a pit that there’s nothing that could possibly get me out, no light could ever reach down to a darkness that dwells so deep, hot chocolate is an instant cure. A comfort. A balm that soothes my soul. A warm blanket around my freezing heart. A gentle hand that guides me slowly but surely out of that dark pit.

I do this every time I fall into my pit. It has gotten me out every single time. Not right away some days, but it leaves a lasting impact and has reduced the frequency of my ‘mental lows’. It’s imprinted in my mind that when I feel low, I am worth being loved then too. When I feel worthless, I am worth love especially then.

If you’re feeling low today, please do one kind, loving act of service for yourself. You deserve to feel good. You deserve to be shown kindness and love. Especially if the person showing that to you is you.

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mysticpurinsblog · 20 days

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learning that recovery is different for everyone has been a hard path. i thought i had to ignore all my disordered habits until they disappeared, but obviously they didn't, so i relapsed again and again.

then i started reading about addiction and how a psych team works with those kinds of patients, and i started to use that knowledge into my own recovery.

i will forever be addicted to starving. there will not be a day in my life in which i wake up and not think about my eating disorder, not think about weight loss nor counting calories.

however, i know the damage it made to myself, my body, and the ones i love. so i know i must stop one day at a time.

since i learned that i started being more compassionate to myself. started understanding that i had the habit of making those weight loss plans, the habit of counting calories, and that stuff. and that can't change fast. and it's alright.

i allow myself to count calories if i want to, i just try to keep them into a healthy amount, that's enough for me and my body. If i have a rough day, i can also make those weight loss plans i used to, i just don't force myself to follow them.

i found my eating disorder was rooted in trauma, and my ocd has much to do with it. so when i am triggered about daily life stuff, or i feel anxious, i find myself returning to this habit.

it's not easy to stop acting like you hate yourself when it's all you learned. it's alright. it will pass. just be compassionate and understanding. ed are also addictions, and it's not easy to battle it

#recovery #ed recovery #recovering from abuse #recovering from trauma #compassionate reminders #positive thoughts #positivity #mental health #mental illness

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outragedtortilla · 7 months

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want to print this out and paste it into each new scrapbook

#lucy dot jpg #compassionate reminders #52481

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wikipedie · 1 year

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hey don't cry. you try so hard because you care. you want to matter and I'll tell you that you do. we may be replaceable in the cogs of capitalism but in the weaves of the universe we are irreplaceable. it's gonna be alright, ok?

#compassionate reminders #note to self really #a bit of a hard day but we're trying #we're getting through it fam

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vizthedatum · 3 months

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I saw this and…

I want to believe this. I want this to be my reality.

My last partner - they did a lot for me - and I would always remind them that they should only do things for me if they could and if they can. I don’t want anyone to overextend themselves. Because I know how that goes.

There are people who can’t be there for me, and that’s ok! I just need clarity about it.

Just as much as I am learning how to stand up for myself and my personal boundaries, I need people to be honest with me too. Even if it’s disappointing.

My ex (and honestly several exes) started building resentment for the things they did for me - so let me be clear:

I don’t want it if it’s not done with love and care. Yes, I might need help with heavy-lifting or coming to an appointment with me or a task I’m struggling with… but I do not want help that is conditional, out of obligation that is completely misguided and not centered in love, and/or with strings attached (unless a prior arrangement of trade has been negotiated).

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therapyandfolklore · 2 years

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Daily reminder to not take criticism from anyone you wouldnt take advice from ♡

#daily reminder #positivity #positive quotes #positivethinking #love #love yourself #be yourself #compassionate reminders #compassion #beautiful quote #beautiful #kind words #be kind to yourselves #self love #confidence #happiness #you are valid #healing

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moonlit-positivity · 3 months

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I love myself. I love my life. I love my journey. I love my mistakes. I love my failures. I love my passion. I love my introspection. I love my progress. I love myself in all the best ways I possibly could.

#recovery #ptsd #trauma #boundaries #mental health #healing #healing thoughts #affirmations #positivity #reminders #encouragement #suggestions #communication #failures #self hate #self love #compassionate reminders #growth

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oliverinaestheticplaces · 3 months

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Stinky Bear Motivation! ❤️‍🩹 At least we're here 🥴

#aesthetic #kidcore #kidcore aesthetic #teddy bear aesthetic #reminders #soft positivity #warm reminders #soft reminders #compassionate reminders #suggestions #affirmations #agere

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transcendragon · 1 month

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You Deserve Rest

My original art made in Procreate, image description in alt text

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crisishauntline · 3 months

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Someday you will be loved by someone who loves the distance between you just as much as your closeness,

Who loves how you much value freedom and free thought,

Who is glad when you choose to spend time with yourself and return to them with new discoveries, inventions, insights, and questions to share,

Who is curious and excited to discuss differences in core beliefs, passions, and ways of loving,

Who is not afraid to pursue their own dreams or help you pursue yours, even if they may lead you away from each other,

Who tells you they love you just to tell you, not test you, and hears you when you tell them,

Who can hold and tend their pain without resenting you for the times you can’t do it with them,

Who remembers the promises they have made, and works to mend the ones they have broken,

Who loves you more than they fear your absence.

Someday you will be the person who can love someone without losing herself,

Who does not let the fear of being judged make her run from closeness, dissociate from her feelings, or take offense at misunderstandings,

Who trusts herself enough to set clear, firm boundaries and keep them with kindness and consistency,

Who can rejoice in debate and difference without forcing her ideas on others or discounting their experiences,

Who can draw upon her strengths, accept and heal her wounds, and boldly pursue her dreams without waiting for approval or permission,

Who can love and give without staking her self-worth on being perfectly useful or pleasing,

Who is secure enough to give reassurance without defensiveness or projection,

Who holds herself and others equally accountable for commitments made,

Who loves and cares for herself as fully as she does others.

#affirmations #love life #self compassion #breakup #compassionate reminders #heartbreak #personal #self love #self care #my writing #poem #poetry #breakup poetry

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cust-e · 2 years

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So I, like maybe some of you, have been feeling weird lately. Not in like a quirky "I've been replacing my hotdogs with steamed pickles and I like it" kind of way, but more of a "things don't feel right"/"I don't feel right" way.

The reason might be different for many of you. A fair number of people will have similar reasons. Regardless of reason, you are feeling this way.

Maybe it's accompanied by other emotions too. Anxiety, unease, dread, anger, sadness, etc.

I'm here with this post, for myself yes, but for anyone else that needs it:

I see you.

I validate you and your feelings.

Even if your friends don't, your families don't, those close to you and important to you won't; it's important to acknowledge this thing you are feeling.

My hope is that, like me, you have one person you know would be able to comfort you and talk with you about this.

Lastly I want to say, regardless of how you feel about this thing; you are loved.

(✿^‿^)

#recovery #current year #current events #mental illness #compassionate reminders #recent things have been a weight on me #ive genuinely been really scared of everything #sometimes all you need is a hug #someone to tell you: it will be alright #it will

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soothingbalmforyourhrt · 9 days

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When the world says “give up”

Hope whispers “try one more time”

#compassionate reminders #i am cringe but i am free #poets on tumblr #poetry

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