#i lost hours of sleep and many stuff i had on was bloody but i learned important shit.

[bubbles-lounge]

Hello again! It's time for angst!

What if reader was kindapped and they we're to busy that they found out like 1-2 days later then when they found Reader she/he was covered in blood (but reader survived)

(Have a good day!)

Alrightyyyyyy! This gonna be fun

By the way I did so that reader was found as no use and just dumped somewhere in the nation(probably not to far if the nations big)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Childe

He came back from work exaughsted all he wanted to do was hold you, he opened the door and yelled that he was home waiting for you to throw yourself at him like you always would do. He waited but nothing happened, mabye you were just asleep, yea. He walked rather fast to your shared room to not see you there, panic now was pumpkin through his veins. He ran around the house to find you, the stuff hadn't been touched for a few days, childe was scared. He ran out the house, the exaughsion he felt before gone. All he wanted to do was find you. He had spent awhile running around trying to find you, but when he found you he felt his soul leave his body. You were there but your state was terrible, blood was every where.. He ran to you and felt for your pulse, it was there! He picked you up and ran as Fay as he could back to your house to help you.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Diluc

He was very busy with the winery. He had barely been coming into your room and sleeping, hell he barely saw you any more, so when his work load started to go down to a reasonable amount he went straight to find you asking adaleline where you where only to hear her say you went out for shopping a day ago but she hasn't seen you since, she said that she probably missed you and you were in their bedroom. Diluc nodded a went straight to your bedroom. He didn't see you and what he had thought when adaeline said she hasn't seen you since you left for shopping came back, someone kidnapped you. He oaniced as he ran out of the manor and went looking for you, through mondstadt city, still couldn't find you, he ran out of mondstadt city to find you. He found you just not how he would have hoped, there you we're covered in blood. He picked you up and checked your pluse and once he knew there was a pluse he ran back to the manor to have someone help you.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Dottore

He is always busy. He tries to make time for you but he just gets so lost in his work that he forgets about time. After all he hasn't ever really had a proper S/O. So imagine when he finally finishes the assignment that the harbingers had asked him to do(mainly pierro) only for the segments to tell him that they haven't see you recently. He thinks you just went out for a bit, until they mention it's been over a day since you were seen by anyone. Now dottores concerned, where are you? He sent the clones to look for you, they had came back after too many hours, mabye even a day. Dottore saw your limp and bloody body in one if their arms. He grabbed everything he knew he needed to help you. Let's say he never let the segments shrug that off again.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Alhaitham

Alhaitham had been quite busy since the incident with the sages and being the acting-grand sage. He hadn't been home for a week or two and he entered the door exhausted and just wanting to go and lay in your arms, he closed the door and went straight to your shared room as he expected you to be asleep with how late it was and with the fact he didn't hear you downstairs. But as he entered the bedroom and couldn't see you he started to search the house for you but after ages of searching for you and not being able to find you he started to panic. He left the house as he started ask any Sumeru citizens that were awake if they had seen you, most people knew who you were as you were often see with him, when nobody had seen you recently he panicked more as he left the city and started to look at any camps around and found you near a Fatui camp but your state was bad. You had blood everywhere and cuts all over your body. Alhaitham picked you up and ran back to the city to have you checked up as he was running he checked you pulse as was abit relieved to feel it.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Sorry I haven't posted in a while,my mental health has been declining recently i apologize to the anon that sent me the other ask, I'll get to it soon.

Remember you are wonderful, stunning and beautiful<3

Remember to eat and drink water(especially if your Ina hot country) <3

Have a lovely day/night<3

Tag list:

@angelofdarknes

#🌹Yumi-Writes🌹 #genshin impact #alhaitham #alhaitham x you #dottore #dottore x you #diluc #diluc x you #childe #childe x you #alhaitham x reader #dottore x reader #diluc x reader #childe x reader

[aclosetfan]

Hi 👋, I was wondering, if you didn’t mind, if you’d wanna share any head cannons about any of your ongoing fics, like the fake dating au or parasomnia or anything??

Haha sure!

I’ve been thinking about parasomnia a lot lately, so I think I’ll rant about that!

Plot-focused ideas:

The magic system I’m using is undefined. I have a loose idea of how the curse they’re all under works but I’m still like ??? Here’s a basic idea, but I need to make it make sense:

HIM is a demon, duh. The mirror is his window into the world. The mirror has taken many forms and currently is a vanity brought to Townsville by a bratty girl no longer with us (rip Princess I love you but your death is plot important). The mirror finds its way to this shed, no one knows why, but I know it’s because the vanity has had multiple owners since and was moved to the preschool shed for storage as a favor in return for a favor, and so forth and so forth.

Putting your blood on the surface brings you in contact with HIM, who allows you to really look into the depth of your soul and find the answer you’re seeking. There’s a price, though. That price is 1) you never know exactly what you’re seeking 2) your mirror-self is desperately trying to break out of the mirror. If they get you, they take your body and HIM gets your soul, which he consumes for power. So, basically, you’re forced to fight your inner mirror self as you attempt to piece together some sort of enlightenment (because, you know, HIM likes a good puzzle and nothing’s scarier then self reflection.)

But this piece of information sort of gets lost over time. Like, instead of working on yourself, HIM’s basically offering to fix your inner demons for you, but you have to figure out what needs to be fixed, but no one ever survives, so that little piece of information—that you need to be fixing yourself—is never shared between owners, which is all fine and dandy with HIM. He becomes a phantom akin to Bloody Mary. Ppl do the ritual for fun and then get stuck in this terrifying self-led therapy session

But does that even make sense?? I’ll flesh it obviously, but is it lame?? Also, I was thinking that you’re only stuck in the mirror world from 12-4, which encompasses the general witching hours, but idk why. I think maybe because the realms between the shadow world and the real realm are weakest then. But idk maybe that’s too short of a time period. I think four hours every night would suck tho so idk idk. I want their time in the shadow/mirror realm to affect their sleep.

Other fun magic things — light portals for quick travel that Bubbles is only able to adequately transverse. She’s got the “sight”

Brick understands what the mirror people are saying. To everyone else, it’s just pig Latin.

Healing is quicker in the mirror/shadow world because you’re not really physically there unless something is damaged beyond repair. So if you get cut in the beginning of your time, by the time you wake up, what may be left on you is only a faint bruise—like what happens sometimes with active sleepers.

Because you’re not physically there, stuff isn’t really physically there either, so if you move a car in the shadow realm, the physical car isn’t moved. But if you total the car, the car in the real world is destroyed. So locals think there’s some unexplainable crime/ghost problem.

Character focused:

Despite being a grade above Brick and Boomer, Blossom is the youngest of the group. She skipped a grade.

Boomer has a crush on Bubbles, but doesn’t end up with her. She’s not interested in him because she’s almost seventeen and is def not interested in dating a freshman. Sorry blue-lovers, but I promise it’s still a fulfilling relationship and there may be someone else for lil Boomer 😉

Mitch is actually plot important. He’s a prick but he ends up redeemed.

The Professor is VERY VERY plot important but isn’t anyone’s father. Mojo is equally as important — and a good foster parent (🤫)

Bubbles is raised by her grandparents, Mayor and Ms. Mayor. Her parents died in a car crash. Blossom is a test tube baby. Her mother is Bellum, who ends up marrying Sedusa, or here, strictly Ima Goodlady, who Blossom considers her annoying, gold-digging step-monster. Buttercup is raised by her mom, Ms. Keane. She has a father, but he’s not in the picture. He never remarried, but has a long term partner, who’s about 15 years older than Buttercup, and recently had a son named Ken. Buttercup’s never had the pleasure of meeting her brother and she doesn’t like talking about it.

Brick was abandoned as a baby. Butch’s parents could no longer take care of him (in prison/addiction issues), so he was taken in by the state. He’s in contact with them, but it hurts him a lot. Boomer was also taken in by the state, but his mother wasn’t a good woman, so they are no longer in contact. He doesn’t talk about it at all. And if you pry, you now have beef with brick and butch

Buttercup has a crush on Butch pretty much instantly. Butch doesn’t acknowledge her romantically until later on in the story, so yes, slow-burn. He’s too busy adjusting to the craziness.

Both trios are co-dependent. You don’t get Bubbles if Blossom and Buttercup can’t come.

#parasomnia #anon asks #sorry I rambled about world building more than headcanons but that’s what I’m mainly thinking of rn

[chibishortdeath]

Alright I’ve thought about it a bit, let’s rant about just how horrifying the curse Simon was afflicted with would be! Consider this like a part one of sorts for Simon’s Quest analysis stuff cause I could talk about this one game for hours on end—

I’m gonna put a cut here because warning ⚠️ descriptions of decay, gorey stuff, disease, and some pretty bad mental effects. Stay safe guys, don’t read further if you can’t handle those topics!

I’ve seen multiple different descriptions of it from different media and manuals, but, just from this little line alone, this is already a pretty awful fate for the guy. High emphasis on the word decay. That in itself can imply a lot of different things, sometimes all at once. And keep in mind too, he’s had this over the course of 7 years. Simon is probably already an absolute wreck from this wayyyyy before the game even starts.

First of all, getting hit on the back is a bad spot for any kind of infection or spreading disease (closest irl counterpart). That’s awfully close to a lot of vital things you don’t want something spreading to including the spine, lungs, heart, etc etc. Especially for deeper cuts because we’re talking Dracula level injury here, not like a paper cut or something. Hell, too deep of a hit on the back might cause some nerve damage, not to the extent of paralysis in his case, but general chronic pain from a wound that won’t heal properly is uhhh… not great. :( I’ve also seen some media say that the curse causes wounds to not heal, bleeding, the American manual even mentions it effecting the soul, awful stuff. I generally like to think “Bloody Tears” is referring to Simon tbh.

Another thing, with afflictions that cause decay generally the smaller appendages start getting hit hard with it first. It’s the same way for a lot of other conditions; fingers, toes, earlobes, anything protruding like that because the body considers them lowest priority in a survival situation like that and it wouldn’t kill you to lose them. Necrosis especially has things start turning ruddy colors, blacken, and start forming holes in the layers of skin (@ @ ;). Obviously this alone is excruciating. Poor dude has to walk for days on end like that…

And slowly deteriorating could also imply some form of wasting. Fats usually go first, then muscle, which is also very not good when you’ve gotta beat the clock to survive. Scary thing is that the brain is like 60% fats and not immune to any of this whoops—

Something I don’t really see anyone consider very often when talking about the curse (not that I’ve seen many people talk about this 💀) is how absolutely mentally fucked up Simon would be from it. Just the terror of knowing you’re slowly rotting to death would be enough to drive most people into some kind of despair or panic, but seeing and feeling all the gruesome details of it is even worse. Being in constant pain and stress isn’t good for anyone, especially someone who is already weakened from illness. But the sheer mental deterioration this guy would be having from the decay itself oh my god (0_o ). Looking up widespread brain shrinkage like that and uh some of the early signs are already stuff like seizures and extreme headaches. Add the fact that he doesn’t really sleep much for upwards of 7 days and it’d be an absolute miracle if this guy wasn’t hallucinating and/or completely hysterical by this point among other things. I mean, no wonder so much of this game is running around lost and confused, not only are people lying to his face, Simon is probably just barely keeping his shit together the whole time.

So just imagine for a second all of these things combined. No wonder people were terrified of him, he probably genuinely looked like a corpse. Eeeee yikes yikes ouch, poor guy :’’’’’(.

Anyway, Konami where is my horror focused Simon’s Quest remake you cowards—

#castlevania #castlevania games #text post #simon belmont #simon’s quest #analysis post #theory posting #incoherent rambling #somebody give this 1600s vampire hunter man a hug #not too hard tho that might hurt oof #:’’’’’’( #sometimes I think about this a little too hard and then gross myself out #the other times I just end up drawing about it #seriously though where is my Simon’s Quest remake god damnit #I’m a little terrified that Konami might do it wrong tho tbh so uh #now I’m thinking about that line again and I just #‘Simon was looking back at his life’ #ashfkdjshsjdjdjshshhdjshahd sad things #I will now imagine sad things before falling asleep tonight lol #I am so normal about this game

[12colors]

TD All'n'Awful - "Even Bigger Sleep - part 2"

Insominatron

We cut to the moment where everyone are at the campire pit (the place where elimination ceremony usually takes place).

Chris:

I wanted to thank Chef for making this wonderful and filling breakfast for you today.

Chef comicaly bows like a princess He will now explain the rules of the Insominiatron.

Chef:

Whoever falls asleep gets eliminated.

Nobody leaves this area, except for bathroom breaks, unless they are already eliminated.

The first team who will have every member eliminated, loses, and the team who lasts the longest, gets the mansion.

Since this challenge will take multiple days, those who will be eliminated, will be able to rest in the places they won in yesterday's challenge.

After this challenge is over, your new sleep places will be assigned based on how well your team performed, like the last time. Understood?

Most contestants nod, so Chris Follows.

Chris:

Great. So the Insominatron starts... NOW!

Lindsay:

Hey Beth. Since Gwen is in our team, do you think that we will win this?

Beth:

Maybe... But I'm not sure. There are few new people who might perform better.

I guess that we will just have to hope for the best.

Camera zooms out, and we fast forward to 12 hours later. It's 10pm now.

We see Eva listening to music, and Sam playing on his 3BS, with Sierra, Zee and Harold behind his shoulders, commenting on his gameplay.

Chris then enters this area, announcing something to the players.

Chris:

12 hours have just passed. I'm quite suprised that this many people survived up to this point.

And as expected... Aggressive Ants are doing the worst.

Camera shows Aggressive Ants with Lightning and Damien asleep.

Chris:

The only other team that have someone fail already, were Cruel Crows with Dakota.

Camera shows Dakota sleeping on the floor.

After that, Camera zooms out so show that no one was paying attention to Chris, do to how tired they were.

Chris then decides to take out his megaphone.

Chris:

DAKOTA, LIGHTNING AND DAMIEN, WAKE UP! YOU ARE ELIMINATED!

Damien and Lightning. Dakota doesn't yet.

Lightning:

Aww man.

Damien: Walks up to Damien

Maybe it's not as bad? We will be able to go back to the cabins, and finaly cach some real sleep without Izzy.

Lightning:

You are right! Bye team!

Lightning and Damien leave the insominatron area.

Trent:

Lucky...

Chris then walks towards still slipping Dakota with the megaphone.

Chris: Shouts to her ear through the megaphone

DAKOTA YOU ARE ELIMINATED!

Dakota: wakes up very quickly and grabs her ear.

OWWW! CHRIS!

Chris:

You fell asleep. Now go

Dakota still had ringing in her ear

Dakota:

What?!

Then, B pointed at it, and moved both his hand next to his neck, and then lied his face on them, showing that Dakota fell asleep, which she saw and understood.

Dakota:

Oh...

She looked back at her team.

Sorry team...

Mike:

It's not a big deal.

Dakota:

What?!

Mike then just raised thumbs up.

Dakota:

Well, good luck guys.

And she walked back to the mansion.

Chris:

Well, that will mostly likely all for now. I was supposed to tell you old bedtime stories, but It turned out that I had my stylisyst planned for this hours, so I gotta go.

Next elimination will be tomorow, in about 12 hours. Better stay awake everyone!

And Chris walks away.

We zoom away, and fast forward 12 hours.

(of course we might show some night hygincs, but I'm too tired to think of any. Something like B tying down Asleep Owen, to stop him from sleepwalking again)

It's morning again.

Chris returns with a coffie.

Chris:

Rise and shine everyone!

Duncan: Clearly tired

Shut it Chris.

Chris:

Let's go over the people who got eliminated over night:

Trent, Brik and Chase from Aggressive Ants

Camera zooms at them, waking up

Suprisingly no one from Bloody Beavers, considering that they slept in the forest.

Cameron:

Well, that's because we didn't get tired during the race as everyone else, beca-

Chris: Irritated

Are you the host? Then leave this stuff for me, okay?

Ekhem

Cruel Crows lost Wayne.

Camera zooms at Caleb waking up Wayne.

In Deadly Deer, Owen Obviously fell asleep, and Raj too.

Raj and Owen wake up. Owen sees that he is tied up and screams.

Owen:

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!

Jo:

It's just a rope you stupid Ow-al!

Axel get's her survivalist knife and cut's the rope

Owen:

Thank you!

Chris:

Explosive Eagles lost Ripper, and Ferrocious Ferrets lost Harold.

Everyone who I mentioned, go to the main Lodge for the Breakfast. Yesterday's losers are already there.

Everyone Eliminated (Trent, Brick, Chase. Wayne & Raj, Owen, Ripper and Harold) go away.

Alejandro:

Will we eat something?

Chris:

Chef is now busy with Losers, so expect your breakfast in about and hour.

Camera then goes inside the Lodge, where Dakota, Lightning and Damien are already eating their breakfast. The breakfast is Cabin quality for everyone, which isn't that good, but it could be way worse, so no one is complaining.

And just a reminder – Dakota is kneeling in front of the table, because she just wouldn't fit when sitting like Damien and Lightning.

Dakota:

So who do you guys think didn't last the night?

Lightning:

Why should I care? They're no me!

Dakota:

But you were one of the first three to fall asleep.

Lightning:

I know. I just said that I don't care about THEM.

Dakota:

What about you Damien?

Oh wait, you didn't watch the show...

Damien:

Well, I did watch it after my season, just to see if previous seasons were also Dangerous... And maybe learn one thing or two...

Dakota:

So who do you think snoozed during the night?

Damien:

Hmmm...

Smiles and points at Dakota

Owen.

Dakota:

Yeah, that's super obvious.

There is a bit of unnecessary silence, so they get to eating their meals.

And so, the losers i listed above arrive.

Ripper: Sees What they are eating

Oh thank god we are gonna finaly eat something normal!

Turns to Damien

Give me that!

Damien:

That's my portion! Go to chef and get your own.

Chef smiles... In not a nice way.

Ripper:

No way I'm gonna ask him. You go!

Damien:

Ugh... And what If I won't?

Ripper:

I'm gonna take away yours.

Damien:

Fine, Fine... Just wait here.

Since there was no line yet, Damien went straight towards Chef's Window

Damien:

Umm... Master Chef?

Chef: Smirks

Oh, haven't heard that name in years! What's up kid?

Damien:

So... Ripper is a little kid and is too afraid to come here and ask for food, so could I take a portion and give it to him?

Chef: Readies the food tray

One thing. Seconds are not allowed here unless you are willing to take the price.

Gives the tray to Damien So If I see you eating this, I will assume that you accepted the price.

Damien:

W-What's the price?

Chef:

If you eat this food, you will see.

But otherwise, you are safe.

Damien:

O... kay?

Damien walks away from the window, a line to the window was already formed behind him.

Damien walks up to Ripper.

And notices that his tray from before was empty.

Damien: Turns to Ripper

DID YOU JUST EAT MY BREAKFAST?!

Ripper: Stressed out, with pieces of Damien's food around his mouth.

N-No! It was... Umm...

Ripper: Points at Owen, who is waiting patiently in line.

Him!

Owen:

What did I do?

Damien: Turns back to ripper

Ripper, since you ate my breakfast,

Points at the tray he is holding

I m gonna eat this one.

Damien is indeed about to do that, but he then remembers something, and looks back at the window, and sees Chef grinning at him.

Damien: Shoves Ripper's plate on the table.

Nevermind. I hope you will choke on this.

And Damien goes back in line.

After Harold, who was last in line gets his food, Damien comes up to Chef's window, again.

Everyone else is eating.

Damien:

Umm... So what was the price for the seconds?

Chef:

Ah, to recieve seconds, you will have to compete in a bonus challenge!

Chris: Enters through the doors.

DID I JUST HEAR „CHALLENGE”?!

Chef:

Yes. This guy over here wanted seconds.

Damien: Stressed out

Challenge? What challenge?

Chris:

Chef will chase after you with famous Spicy Spaghetti Gun.

Chef is seen getting ready, and loading his Spaghetti Gun.

If you survive and won't get hit for 60 seconds, you win.

Now I'll give you a 10 seconds head start...

10...

9...

Damien:

B-But I didn't say-

Chris:

8...

Damien:

-that I agree to take the challenge!

Chris:

7...

6...

Damien:

There was nothing like this-

Chris:

5...

Damien:

-In previous seasons!

Chris:

4...

Trent:

Dude, you are wasting your head start!

Chris:

3...

Damien finaly runs out of the lodge, Screaming

Chris:

2...

1...

Chef, Go!

Chef runs out of the lodge, chasing after Damien.

Wayne:

Hey Raj, how long do you think he will last?

Raj:

I give him 10 seconds.

Wayne:

I give him 5.

They get back to eating, and soon enough chef returns to the lodge, holding Damien on his shoulder. Damien is covered in the spicy spaghetti.

Chef puts Damien on one of the table seats, next to Trent.

Damien:

Aww, man...

Trent:

Well, at least you could eat the spaghetti.

Damien:

I guess...

The camera moves then to the communal bathroom.

B is really tired, so he washes his face, to refresh himself a little.

But before he leaves, he notices a janitor's bucket.

He grabs the bucket and fills it with water.

The camera then cuts, and we are back in campfire pit, where the insominatron takes place.

We focus on Deadly Deer.

Most of them are really showing their tiredness. Only reason why Sadie wasn't eliminated yet, was because she kept talking with Katie.

Jo is near falling asleep, when she gets splashed with cold water, along with the rest of the team. It was B who splashed them.

Jo: Mad as hell at B

B! What the-

Axel:

Thanks.

Jo: Turns to Axel

Why are you thanking him?! My clothes are now all wet.

Axel:

Well, thanks to him, you didn't fall asleep, right?

Jo:

Well... Maybe...

Jo turns back to B. Not as mad as before.

Jo:

But next time, we discuss things like this, We are a team! Got it?

B nods, and sits alongside them.

We then turn to Ferocious Ferrets.

Zoey, Leshawna and Tyler are just sitting there tired.

Priya is sitting too, but she doesn't feel tired at all.

Scary Girl is... somewhere?

Sam, is still playing on his BS, with Sierra and Zee looking from behind his shoulder and commenting on his gameplay, or the game itself.

Tyler turns at Sam and asks him a question:

Tyler:

Dude, how long does this battery last?

Sam: Pauses the game

Well, I had it strongly modified, so it lasts somewhere around 48 hours of gaming.

Tyler:

So, how much of it is left?

Sam:

Well, now it's around 50%, so like another 24 hours.

Tyler:

So you are gonna just keep playing?

Sam:

Well, there is nothing else to do...

Zee:

Sam, after you complete this case and send Mr. Karma to jail, could I take my turn and play Explorers of Sky?

Sierra:

Oh! Oh! Could I after Zee play some Curby Super Star Ultra?

Sam: Returns to playing.

Yeah, Of course. Just give me few minutes.

We go then go to Bloody Beavers.

Eva isn't listening to music anymore, and Cameron points that out:

Cameron:

Why aren't you on your music?

Eva:

I already listened the entire playlist 4 times since the challenge started. I could use some break.

Cameron:

Makes sense.

= Cameron's Confessional =

Cameron:

Yesterday we lost... Well 2 days ago.

Today's challenge started Yesterday...

Umm...

So yeah, in this challenge, we are the only team where everyone stayed awake.

I'm not saying that we will win, but I like our odds...

Let's just hope that I didn't just jinx myself.

= End of the Confessional =

Camera zooms out to see the entire island, and we time skip around 12 hours, until it's 10 pm. Chris arrived with a book.

Chris:

Wow! I'm suprised that no one fell asleep since last morning.

And I brought a reward for you!

Some might already recognise it: Canadian history – popup book!

Gwen:

You can't be serious!

Chris:

I can, and often am. And this is one of those times.

Staci:

Oh! I recognise this book! My Gradma designed and wrote it.

She based it on the Info her Father – My Grand Grandfather, gave her.

Chris:

Staci! Don't Interrupt me!

Staci: Either ignores or just doesn't hear him.

And my Grand Grandfather I just mentioned was one of the best historians in Canada.

He continued the legacy of his parents, who are my Grand Grand Grandparents.

Chris:

Staci!

Staci:

But there is a rumor, that some parts of their notes were stolen and then rewritten from my Grand Grand Grand Uncle, from my Grand Grand Grand Mother's side.

Chris gave up, trying to shut Staci up.

Staci:

But the Grand Grand Grand Uncle, didn't have any proof, since his office weirdly were caught on fire, that day, and the notes dissapeared.

Millie is seen writing down the stuff she says.

And Eva puts on her headphones again.

Ezekiel sees that, and puts his earplugs in his ears.

Staci:

He then claimed that her sister, who I will remind you, was my Grand Grand Grand Mother, stole the notes from him, and then set up the office on fire, but he didn't have any evidence, and the only people who were aware of the notes before the „crime”, was only him and his sister.

Heather was irritated. She walked up behind Staci, and was about to slap her in the head, but she stopped as she noticed something...

A lot of others were yawning as she was talking like that. Even Chris.

She then decided to just sit down, knowing that the situation is beneficial for her.

Staci:

But I'm getting off the topic here. Let me just tell about the inside of the book.

So the first chapter is about beavers, right? My Grandma made a pun in the introducion. It was about Beavers and Hats, or something?

Well, the fun thing about this is that her Father - My Grand Grand Father, who as I said was one of the greatest historians in Canada, asked her to include it, and even if she didn't like the idea, she did it, because the book was being made because of him.

We then see Millie writing it all down again.

Another timeskip, until just before 10am next morning.

We see the catastrophy Staci Caused.

The first person we see is Millie, sleaping. Her notebook is in her hand, and her pen fell on the ground.

We see Staci sleeping too, and multiple other contestants.

Only few people are still awake:

From Aggressive Ants: Ezekiel

From Bloody Beavers: Eva

From Cruel Crows: Gwen (barely)

From Deadly Deer: Axel

From Explosive Eagles: Scott (barely)

Ferocious Ferrets have 3 people: Sam, Sierra (Barely) and Zee.

Then battery from Sam's Console ran out, and NonTendo's Icon: Pablo, Said very loudly: BYE! SEE YA! Waking Chris up. The console then turned off.

Chris:

Wha, Wha?

Sam:

Aww, man... The battery ran out.

Sierra:

Damn, that sucks.

Sierra then falls on the floor, asleep.

Chris then realised what he is supposed to do.

He takes out the megaphone.

Chris:

WAKE UP!

Everyone except for Ezekiel, Eva, Gwen, Axel, Scott, Sam and Sierra go to the lodge

There will be breakfast for you soon.

Almost everyone who was asleep wakes up... Except for sierra.

Chris:

Zoey, be so kind and take your teammate over there...

Points at Sierra

with you to the lodge, okay?

Zoey:

Umm... Okay...

And she grabs Sierra, and drags her agross the floor, towards the lodge.

= Duncan's Confessional =

Duncan:

Just if you are wondering,

I did NOT fell asleep because I was weak.

I did it because of strategy.

If we would lose today, Izzy would be going home.

And since Ezekiel is the only one lasting, we will lose very easly.

= End of the Confessional =

Chris then looks at comicaly not existing watch on his hand.

Chris: Turns to the remaining campers

Eva, take off the headphones, I will be speaking. Thanks you.

Okay, last night turned out differently than I was expecting. Chef was supposed to give all of you sleeping powder, after I reached the 10th chapter of the canadian history book, which was supposed to happen the night before that, when I was supposed to tell fairytales, but since neither of those two times happened, I guess we will have to do it now. Chef?

A forklift drives up to this area. Chef exits it, in a suit of a fairy.

Few people chuckle.

Chef then gets irritated, and throws a grenade in the middle.

It is a smoke grenade, but when it explodes just as it hits the ground, it turns out that it was filled with condensed sleeping gas.

The sleeping gas covered every contestant remaining. And they breathed it in.

Sam:

Man, I don't feel good. GG everyone.

Sam falls on the floor, asleep

Scott:

Ha! I live on a farm! I breathed worse stuff there. This is nothing!

Scott then takes a deep inhale, to supposely impress everyone aroun...

And he instantly fells on the floor, asleep.

Chris:

Scott is eliminated!

We then move to the lodge, where everyone else is waiting. Chris voice continues though the speaker in the lodge.

Chris:

Explosive Eagles get 6th place.

Most of Explosive Eagles just lower their heads and look at the floor in dissapointment. But some have more outraging reactions:

Courtney:

How could he?! He did that on purpose!

Mildred:

It's just some gas! I would survive longer than him!

Geoff:

Yeah, because inhaling weird gases, is all you do off-camera!

Bowie:

Burn!

We then return back to the campfire pit.

Gwen then falls asleep on her seat, and Axel after her.

Chris:

Gwen eliminated, so Cruel Crows get 5th place. After that Axel, landing her team of of Deadly Deer on 4th.

Eva: Looks at others

Well, I guess that I'm next.

Eva sits on the floor before falling asleep too.

Chris:

Eva managed to give her team of losers of the previous episode, a 3rd place!

Only Zee and Ezekiel are left.

Zee:

Oh man, this funny gas makes my nose tickle.

Zee sits down, and takes the sip of his soda...

Before sneezing, falling behind on his back and instantly falling asleep.

Chris:

Zee fell asleep, so... Ezekiel wins?

Ezekiel raises his arms high up in excitment.

Chris:

Man, this sentence feels weird...

Well. Ferocious Ferrets have 2nd place.

Meaning that Aggressive Ants get the mansion tonight!

Inside the lodge, upon hearing that, everone from Aggressive Ants are celebrating... except for Duncan.

Back at the campfire pit, Ezekiel is... suprised. He breathes in and out very heavly. He cannot believe that he won!

He then falls on the floor from exhaustion and falls asleep.

After-challenge

Chef then drives in the campfire pit in a forklift, equiped in a gas mask.

He picks up, everyone who is asleep (Sam, Scott, Gwen, Axel, Eva, Zee and Ezekiel) and Drives towards the lodge.

When he arrives, he drops everyone in front of the lodge (no one wakes up), equips his cooking clothes, and enters to make the breakfast.

Some time later, as everyone ar eating (except the people I mentioned that are sleeping and Sierra, who is also still sleeping). Chris enters the inside of the lodge.

Chris:

I think everyone heard the results:

Aggressive Ants won the mantion for tonight,

Ferrocious Ferrets and Bloody Beavers will have the Cabins,

Deadly Deer and Cruel Crows will have the Trailers for this night.

Explosive eagles... You have the forest for yourself, and I will see you today in the elimination ceremony.

To everyone who changed their napping place in todays challenge will pack their stuff and move out of the place they stayed in until now, so the others can move in. Better do that before elimination ceremony.

Few hours pass, and the finalists of the challenge, finaly wake up.

It's starting to get dark.

Ezekiel is one of the last people to wake up. We follow him as he goes towards the mansion, already with the stuff he took from the Cabin they had between this and previous episode.

As Ezekiel enters the kitchen of the mansion, he sees that the rest of the team is celebrating their first victory. And they notice that Ezekiel arrived.

Trent: Comes up to Ezekiel.

Ezekiel! Thanks for winning us the mansion tonight. You're the man!

Brick:

Yeah. If we keep working together as a team, we will keep winning.

Damien:

Well, that's kinda too optimistic... But it does make our odds higher.

Izzy:

Tonight gonna be fun!

Duncan:

Oh, shut up Izzy.

Duncan Grabs Ezekiel by the shoulder.

Ezekiel, mind if we take a walk outside?

Duncan's Grip on Ezekiel tightens

Ezekiel:

Yeah... Umm... Dude?

We skip to the part, when they are outside the mansion.

They both walk in silence, which Duncan sudently cuts off.

Duncan: Looks straight ahead, not on Ezekiel

Ezekiel... Do you know why I fell asleep yesterday at night?

Ezekiel:

I don't know, man...

Duncan:

Because, I wanted us to lose.

Ezekiel:

Wha... Why?

Duncan:

We both know that Izzy will cause a lot of trouble in our team. That's why I wanted her eliminated! That's why, when I saw that only you and I were the only people who stayed awake. I knew that you wouldn't last long, so I fell asleep, thinking that we will lose. But...

Ezekiel started expecting what Duncan was thinking.

Ezekiel:

B-But?

Duncan then grabs him and pins him to a tree.

Duncan: Furious

You ruined it! You just had to stay awake, and keep Izzy in the game!

It's your fault, that she will keep the whole team awake, and ruin our chances in future challenges! If you would just fall asleep like a normal person, she would be gone! But No... You just had to be this weird... MUTANT!

When we might have the the chance to eliminate Izzy again?! Tell me!

Ezekiel: Clearly stressed out.

I-I don't know... Tomorow?

Duncan:

Do you know it? No. It could take days, weeks even!

Weeks of pain, brought to the team, all because of YOU!

Are you proud of Yourself?

Ezekiel:

N-No...?

Duncan:

You ARE gonna take it, so Izzy will be silent for tonight.

DO YOU GET IT?!

Ezekiel:

Yes Sir!

Duncan loosens his grip, dropping Ezekiel on the floor.

Duncan:

You better do it, or you might not wake up tomorow!

And don't tell about this to anyone, If you wanna keep your limbs.

Ezekiel just nods.

Duncan walks off, and as soon as Ezekiel can't se him anymore, he starts breathing heavly.

= Duncan's Confessional =

Duncan:

Yes, I might have pressed him a bit too much,

but prison taught me a few things.

One of them is that you don't get results without fear.

= End of the Confessional =

Returning to Ezekiel: It takes him some time, before he can think again.

He thinks for a minute, until he seems to get an idea...

He stands up, and slowly starts moving towards the lodge. As he walks, he looks around. His hands are shaking, and whenever he hears even the smallest sound, he looks at that direction, seeing that there is no danger yet.

Camera then moves. We are in front of Ferocious Ferrets' Cabin, and Scary Girl is outside with her Skull.

Scary Girl:

See? This is just our luck!

As soon as I've found you a friend, It's too far to carry,

and there is no other way to get it over here.

She moves the skull with her hand, like the skull is nodding.

Scary Girl:

Well I guess that we could visit her, but...

Y'know...

„Skull”: Scary Girl moves skull's mouth, and talks for it.

Yeah, it's too far.

And if only there was a way to take my friend over here,

quickly and easly...

Scary Girl then hears something.

Scary Girl:

Did you hear that?

It was Ezekiel, on who we now focus.

He walks up to the forklift, which was near the lodge.

Scary Girl sees him.

Ezekiel enters the vehicle and turns it on, to turn on the lights. He then open's forklift's storage. He looks through it, and sees something he recognises.

There are 2 sleep grenades left, just as the one Chef used during the challenge.

Ezekiel takes them, closes the storage, and turns off the vehicle (along with the lights), and leaves, quickly.

We focus on the Scary Girl again. She looks at her skull, and the skull „looks” at her.

Scary Girl:

Perfect!

Camera then moves to Explosive Eagles, who will be spending the night in the forest.

Everyone except for Scott are there, and setting up a small part of it for the place where they will sleep. But Mildred wasn't in the mood.

Mildred: Drops her bags on the ground

Okay guys, I can't do this. I'm tired, dirty and my face looks almost as bad as Katie's with all this work.

Katie: Turns to Mildred, angry

Excuse me?!

Mildred:

I need to get a shower. Someone better make some food.

And Mildred then left everyone.

Nichelle:

Okay, I'm voting on Blainley. Anyone With me?

Geoff:

Count me in!

Katie:

Me too.

Bowie:

I guess that I could vote on her too.

Geoff:

What about you Courtney?

Courtney:

I'm gonna vote on the traitor!

Bowie:

Who?

Courtney:

Scott! He sabotaged the challenge, and made us lose! I know it!

Katie:

Yeah... Sure... Whatever you think.

Courtney:

UGH! I can't believe that I have to be with such morons in one team!

Scott then comes out of the forest, barely awake.

Courtney: Notices him

Oh! Here he is!

Scott! Tell everyone that you were sabotaging our team!

Scott: Propably didn't understand

W-What? Could you say that again?

Courtney:

AGHHH! I can't hold it with any of you! But if we lose again, I want you all know, that it was Scott's fault!

Courtney walks off.

Scott is kinda confused, so he just sits on a log.

Geoff: Turns to Scott.

Dude! You have to vote on Mildred!

Scott:

Who?

Geoff:

I meant Blainley! Listen, you survived the longest in this challenge, and we need your help. Can you do that?

Scott:

Yes!

Scott then falls asleep.

After Dawn sees the whole situation, she goes to the Confessional.

= Dawn's Confessional =

Dawn:

In Revenge of the Island, Scott sabotaged the team multiple times, and got me eliminated.

But unlike last time... times, I'm not sure whenever he lost the challenge on purpose.

Why?

I can't read auras through the megaphones and long distances.

And after the challenge, he was so tired, that all his thoughts were basicaly daydreaming about chasing rats in his kitchen.

But since he sabotaged in Revenge of the Island, I will assume that-

Knocking sound

Ripper:

Who is there? I really need to use it!

= End of Dawn's Confessional =

As soon as Dawn leaves the confessional, Ripper enters it and locks it.

Dawn walks away from the confessional, and as she does that, Courtney walks across her.

Courtney:

Move out of my way!

Courtney is about to push Dawn out of her way, but Dawn already knew it and moved out of the way already.

Dawn:

The confessional is busy.

Courtney: Starts kicking the stall.

Ah, c'mon! Get out!

Ripper:

Give me a minute!

Dawn:

Are you gonna vote for Scott?

Courtney: Stops.

What?

Dawn:

I'm voting for Scott, and I need others to vote for him too, or Mildred will go home instead.

Courtney:

Of course that I'll vote on Scott! But what do you mean by „others”?

Ripper comes out of the Confessional Stall.

Ripper: Turns to Courtney

What did you want from me?

Dawn:

I've heard that Scott will be trying to beat your farting record.

Ripper:

No!

Dawn:

The only way for you to stop him, is to vote for him tonight.

Ripper:

Wow, thanks weird vampire girl!

Ripper returns back to the stall.

Courtney: Looks at Dawn in disbelief.

H-How did you know?

Dawn:

How often do you see people with yellowish-brown aura?

Courtney:

Never!

Dawn:

Exactly.

Courtney:

That's not what I mea-

Dawn:

We don't have much time before the elimination ceremony. You should try convincing Bowie to vote on Scott, and I will go for Mildred. Okay?

Courtney Looks behind her, in the direction where Bowie and others were.

Courtney:

I guess? Do you think that I'll make it time?

She looks back at where Dawn was, but Dawn dissapeared. Courtney then decided just to go to Bowie.

Courtney arrives back to the place where Bowie, Geoff, Katie, Scott and Nichelle were. She manages to get Bowie on the side to talk with him.

Courtney:

Hey! I need you to vote on Scott.

Bowie:

And wy should I do that?

Courtney:

Would you rather eliminate Scott, the guy who got to the merge both times, or Blainley, who will likely get eliminated the very next ceremony?

Bowie:

Yeah, sure... How many votes are on Scott?

Courtney:

With you, it will be 5.

Bowie:

I will think about it...

Then there is recognisable voice in the speaker.

Chris:

Explosive Eagles, the elimination ceremony will be in 5 minutes, so better hurry!

Oh! And don't forget to wake up Scott and bring him with you!

So we cut to the scene where everyone is walking towards the campfire pit for the elimination ceremony. Scott is barely awake, and needs support of Geoff.

Mildred meanwhile is walking there, covered just in her towels.

= Blainley's Confessional =

Blainley:

Okay, so I had to interrupt my high quality higene sequence, just to walk to the Voting Ceremony and give a vote.

Dawn already told me that Scott will be eliminated if I vote with her, so there was litterally no point in me going if Scott was surely eliminated.

After the ceremony, I will have to redo half of all my work.

Like look at my skin! It looks awful!

Blainley shows her completely normal arm.

= End of the Confessional =

So everyone arrived at the Voting Ceremony and gave away their votes.

Chris:

Explosive Eagles... You were the last team on this challenge.

Chef, could you point out their mistakes that led them to this moment?

Chris looks around, seeing that Chef is missing.

Chris:

Where is Chef?

Few Explosive Eagles shrug.

But Chef finaly arrives, breathing heavly.

Chef:

Sorry that I'm late.

I was sure that I would use the forklift to get here faster...

But I must've misplaced it somewhere.

Chris:

Doesn't matter. Just point out their mistakes like you were supposed to do.

Chef:

Okay.

Scott!

Scott is asleep, so Katie wakes him up.

Scott:

W-Wha?

Chef:

Scott! You managed to last the longest out of your team, but It seems that it was not enough.

Chef then turns to Courtney and Mildred.

Chef:

Courtney and Mildred!

Nobody really likes you here.

Mildred:

What?!

Courtney:

How?! I'm one of the most important people in this team! I was 4th in TD Action! After that I was also 2 times in the merge!

Katie:

Yes, We get it.

Chris:

Let's get to the votes themselves.

I have 8 marshmallows today with me, and one of you aren't gonna recieve one.

That person will be eliminated.

So here are the people who will recieve the Marshmallow:

Geoff

Nichelle

Katie

Bowie

Ripper

Dawn

Those 6 recieve their marshmallows.

Suspense time. Courtney, Scott and Mildred share worried looks

Chris: Throws a marshmallow at Courtney.

Courtney...

Scott and Mildred are worried.

Chris:

This... Is the final marshmallow, a sign of security. One of you will reieve it, and the other one will have to make the walk down the dock of shame, and will get eliminated.

Even more suspense between Scott and Mildred.

Chris:

… Scott!

Chris throws the final marshmallow in Scott's hands.

Mildred: Shocked

What?! How?!

= Bowie's Confessional =

Bowie:

Eliminating Scott was tempting...

But seeing Courtney and Scott fightning was even more tempting.

So Yeah. I voted on Mildred.

= End of the Confessional =

We see Chef dragging Mildred across the dock of shame.

Mildred:

Wait! At least Give me my clothes! I can't get back in just a towel!

Chris:

Don't worry, they will be sent back to you, with mail.

Mildred is thrown inside the Tug of shame, and she swims away in it.

Meanwhile, we get to the trailers, where Deadly Deer and Cruel Crows will be sleeping.

Inside the male one, there are Caleb, Mike, Noah, Wayne, B, DJ, Justin, Owen and Raj.

In the female one, there are Beth, Gwen, Julia, Lindsay, Axel, Jo, Millie and Sadie.

Some of them are already asleep.

But someone seems to be missing.

Mike then turns to B.

Mike:

Mind if we take a walk?

So B and Mike end up outside.

As they walk, they see Dakota setting up her „sleeping place”, outside the females' Trailer.

B and Mike don't stare, but both of them clearly saw it.

Mike and B walk further away.

Mike:

Dude, I need help. You saw that Dakota has sleep problems due to her... size?

B nods.

Mike:

I know that you can make almost anything... So... Could you make something for Dakota to sleep in better? Something that she could easly take and relocate.

B thinks for a second, and then nods. He then shows Mike to follow him.

We then turn back inside the Mansion. Ezekiel finaly returned.

Lightning:

Dude, where were you?

But Ezekiel doesn't anwser.

Duncan: Plays it off cool.

Hey dude! Did you bring what I asked you to?

Ezekiel: Silently.

Yes...

Duncan:

Great. Come sit with us! The Dinner will be here soon!

Ezekiel sits there, silently, as the rest of the team cheers, and talks about various subjects like their victory or other teams.

But Alejandro pays attention to Ezekiel.

Alejandro:

Ezekiel? Is everything okay, mi amigo?

Ezekiel is silent for a minute...

Ezekiel:

Yeah... I'm just tired after the challenge... That's all.

Trent:

Thanks to you, we are in this mansion tonight. You should be able to take a good nap here!

Duncan: Looks sharply at Ezekiel

Yes. Let's hope that everyone will be able to sleep tonight. Isn't it right, Ezekiel?

Ezekiel:

Yes... It is right...

The conversation continues, but without Alejandro.

About B and Mike: They finaly arrive at the Arts and Crafts Center.

B manages to enter in the shed, while Mike waits outside.

B then gets few things out of the shed. A giant sheet of a material, lines, and few other things, like a fully functional sewing mashine.

So B starts to Sew the material.

Mike just waits there, not sure why B wanted him to come.

But finaly, after some time, B is done. He turns off the mashine.

He has made a giant hammock. It is almost 3 times biger than an avareage one. It's quite big, so he and Mike have to carry it back together.

As they return to the trailers, so one is there.

And that meant one thing.

Mike:

Where is everyone?

B points at the lodge.

Mike:

Oh, yeah. Dinner.

B and Mike just leave the hammock where they have seen Dakota before, and then went to the lodge too.

Back in the Mansion, the winners are eating. Ezekiels tries eating too, but after few bites of really good food which he likes, he loses apetyte.

Maybe that's because Duncan is glaring at him the entire time? Who knows.

Ezekiel stands up from the table and goes towards the bedrooms. But instead of entering the male one, he enters the female one, and he hides under the bed, and takes out one of the sleep grenades from his pocket.

He is waiting.

But as he is lying there, in the darkness, thoughts start apearing in his head.

„should I really do it?”

„Maybe what Izzy did was one time?”

„Maybe this method is a little too much?”

But then someone enters the room, and turns the lights on. That person closes the door after them. From under the Bed, Ezekiel sees that the person is indeed Izzy.

He pulls out the grenade pin, and gets out from under the bed.

Izzy:

Ezekiel?

Ezekiel is holding the grenade. Since the pin was pulled out, as soon as he would loosen the grip, the gas would leak out of the grenade.

Izzy:

What are you doing?

Ezekiel:

Ummmm... Sending you to sleep?

Izzy:

Why?

Ezekiel:

Well, the others complained, how you kept them awake few nights ago.

Izzy:

Oh? Why didn't they just ask?

Ezekiel:

Why should I know?

Izzy:

… Anyway... Why do you need a grenade to send me to sleep.

Ezekiel: Looks at his hand with the sleep grenade.

Well, this is sleep grenade... So... It would put you to sleep?

Ezekiel sits on one of the empty beds.

Ezekiel:

Sorry. I don't know why I did that.

Izzy:

So basicaly, they asked you to send me to sleep, because last time, I've made too much noise?

Ezekiel:

Pretty much, yeah.

Izzy:

Okay, I guess I will just have to be lisent tonight... And maybe indeed take some sleep?

Ezekiel: Looks back at his arm

So... What do we do with this?

Izzy:

Just put the pin back or something.

Ezekiel: Looks around.

I think that I've lost it.

Izzy: Takes out a tape.

Well, let's just tape it around, so it will not release!

She tapes the grenade around... And Ezekiel is able to not hold it anymore.

Ezekiel:

Here, keep it for youself. I don't need it anymore.

But please. Just go to sleep, okay?

Izzy:

Okay!

Ezekiel leaves Izzy's room.

Duncan: was waiting for him outside.

Is it done?

Ezekiel: Quietly

yes...

Duncan:

You better be saying the truth.

Duncan goes to the guys room, and Ezekiel follows.

Both of them go to sleep.

The credits roll, with Dakota sleeping on her new hammock, slowly swinging from side to side.

#tdana #td aggressive ants #td bloody beavers #td cruel crows #td deadly deer #td explosive eagles #td ferocious ferrets #td ezekiel #td duncan #td b #td mike #td dakota #td staci #td scary girl #td izzy #td blaineley #td courtney #td scott #imagine what would happen if instead of making an half-assed ending i would go to sleep #tag me cause i m tired ans stuff #goodnight every fucking one and thanks for reading

[moccahobi]

A Fae's Brew to Take You Away [Chapter 14]

Summery: Photography: Taehyung loves it. Specifically he loves film photography. He even spent an entire day hiking and taking photos in a meadow (there was a woman there at first but she left soon after). For Y/n though, Taehyung’s trip to the meadow was the start of something bad. Something real bad.

Pairings: Taehyung (BTS) x Reader, Yoongi (BTS) x Hoseok (BTS)

Rating: Teens and up

Chapter warnings: alcohol

Series warnings (I update as I figure more stuff out): horror, injury, threats, (potentially) major character death, major angst, emotional distress, alcohol

Word Count:  1.5 words

Genre: Angst, Fluff, Fae AU!, College AU!

Tag list: @youarejesting, @i-am-moonchild​

Chapter 13 >> Masterlist << Chapter 14

The sheet mask was wet and cold against Yoongi’s face, some of its serum dripping down his neck and chilling him. Parts of the mask was already drying as the zombie movie was playing in the background, the screams and violence somehow helping Yoongi relax after a stressful week. It felt counter intuitive but there was something nice about how strange and unrealistic the movie was that helped Yoongi seperate himself from day-to-day stress. Currently, someone was running away from many slow zombies, limping towards them in a long drawn out chase scene that really could’ve ended five minutes ago, but all Yoongi could focus on was Hoseok quietly gossiping about his classmates as Yoongi nodded along. He was keeping quiet to prevent his sheet mask from falling off and occasionally copying the kermit meme with his glass of wine ( it helped that Hoseok’s voice was like honey to Yoongi’s ears and Yoongi was addicted). He leaned into Hoseok, and watched from the corner of his eye as Hoseok talked away, his mask magically staying in place. It probably liked being on Hoseok’s face which was completely understandable. 

It was their weekly movie night and Yoongi was over the stars as the two leaned against each other on the couch, legs tangled together lazily. They had gotten close over the course of the movie, laughing and joking around as they excitedly caught each other after a busy and hectic week.

This is what Yoongi needed.

A nice, stress free night with his roommate and friend after the hellish week he had.

He’d just gotten a D on a composition that he’d lost out on multiple nights of sleep on and missed out on meals just to finish. His everything had been put into it and yet his teacher seemed to hate it just as much as Hoseok hated the dingy yellow kitchen lights they had. All of his assignments this week were too big and overwhelming, and they each seemed to demand at least three hours daily just to somewhat stay on track… which he was failing atHe was at least three days behind on two other assignments. It would surely take a few more sleepless nights and missed meals for him to even think about finishing it this month. Even with all of that work, both of his assignments likely wouldn't have been worth the sacrifices Yoongi was forced to make. It was like Yoongi was unable to do anything but struggle and everything he turned in return crashed around him.

He just wanted a breather. 

And when Hoseok came home with a box of wine, two sheet masks, and a pouty face, Yoongi felt invigorated and excited. This is one thing that wouldn't fail him. He wouldn't let it fail. Sure, Yoongi always wanted more from his relationship with Hoseok, but he didn't know if he could take that risk yet. 

Hoseok meant too much to Yoongi now and he wasn’t ready for any change. Their friendship was the only thing keeping him afloat. 

Maybe when he graduates he could try.

Maybe then he could finally have his dream of dating Hoseok. 

Maybe then he can take Hoseok out on a date.

Yoongi looked back at the movie, the person who was attacked by zombies died in a gorey, bloody mess and zombies were getting a closeup of them eating their guts. His mask was getting itchy. Slowly Yoongi took a sip of his wine, savoring the sour taste that rested in his mouth. He was more of a whiskey person but most good whiskeys were too expensive for two college students. Plus, Hoseok was more of a wine person and Yoongi would happily drink any and all of the wine Hoseok offered him.  

Hoseok didn't like whiskey at all so it wouldn't be good for one of their movie nights.

“Oh, Yoongi! You're friends with Taehyung, right?”

Yoongi hummed and nodded.

“Do you think you could convince Taehyung to get me in contact with one of his models? I've been trying for a while and Taehyung just doesn't seem to want to get me in contact with her.”

 Yoongi looked at Hoseok carefully, admiring the way he seemed to glow even under his sheet mask as he mulled over what to say. Yoongi felt his stomach twist with uneasiness as if it was warning him that something bad would happen if he agreed. 

If what Taehyung had said was correct when Yoongi met with him, Hoseok knew Taehyung didn't know this person.

 Hoseok in theory knew that the model was a stranger. Hoseok knew that it was a chance encounter and yet he didn’t relent on finding her. 

Why was Hoseok so bent on meeting this stranger?

It was as if she’d weaseled her way into his mind, taking over all conversations. Just about every conversation had her in it at some point and Yoongi was getting extremely tired of it. Hoseok had only seen her in one picture. 

 Yoongi took a deep sip of his wine, wishing that Hoseok would give this topic up soon and searching for strength in his wine. “ I can ask. What model are you wanting to get in contact with?”

“I don't know her name, but I can send you a photo of her. I have some. Here's my favorite,” Hoseok giggled excitedly (his giggles were an addictive honey to Yoongi’s ears) as he grabbed his phone, turning it on and clearing his notifications. 

Yoongi ignored the way his heart twisted painfully when he saw Hoseok's lock screen. 

He’d changed it. 

Hoseok looked excited as he stared down at the photo. She was looking directly back at them, a shock (that almost looked like fear to Yoongi) painted across her face. 

Bile teased the back of his throat which Yoongi pushed it back with another sip of his wine, grieving the old lockscreen: a photo of them at Jeju beach last year over the winter break. Why did a lockscreen mean so much to Yoongi?

He looked back at Hoseok, his eyes were as bright as when he danced. His smile was one of the broadest and most excited Yoongi had ever seen. It was brighter than when Hoseok won first place after his last photography competition. It was brighter than when Hoseok found out he got his last job as a dance instructor. 

Yoongi looked back at the woman in the photo, her shocked and almost fearful look was something that Yoongi related to so much in this moment. He couldn't understand why Hoseok was so infatuated with her and he didn’t know if he could possibly ever relate. Hoseok’s insistence to photograph her felt otherworldly to Yoongi. That being said, as he continued to listen as Hoseok excitedly talked about the photos with her in it he couldn't bring himself to care, especially when he zoned out slightly and listened to the overload of positive emotions that poured from Hoseok’s talking.

Hoseok's happiness ment Yoongi's happiness.

Even if he was looking on from afar.

“I’ll ask around for her.” 

The hope that flashed across Hoseok’s face made Yoongi feel giddy. He was making Hoseok excited with this promise.

 Yoongi looked away, heat rising up his face as he tried to focus back on the movie. Both of them knew that the movie was less important to the conversations they had, but in that moment it seemed as if they decided to let the conversation die down for a while. 

 At some point Yoongi closed his eyes and imagined that the excitement and happiness he'd watched cross Hoseok space is caused by Yoongi asking him out. It was likely the box wine Yoongi had drunk, but he let himself dream that he was making Hoseok that happy that way. Images of them growing old together and having kids or being amazing uncle's played in his mind to the sound of people’s screams in the gory zombie movie. 

After the movie ended the two had talked about their weeks ahead, Hoseok doing both of their skin care for the night. It wasn't often when he would lend Yoongi his skin care supplies and Yoongi basked in the pampering he was being given, barely paying attention to what Hoseok was saying as he let his calming words wash over Hoseok. He was content to listen to the melodious sounds of Hoseok's voice.

If only movie nights for every night. 

That night Yoongi went to bed with a fuzzy feeling wrapped tight around him like a blanket, his mind replaying the many happy moments tonight and skipping any upset he felt. It was as if he was floating in happiness as he thought of Hoseok’s bright and excited smiles tonight.Yoongi’s face was cold and damp from the many layers of Hoseok’s skin care and it tingled with the ghosts of Hoseok’s soft touches as he applied it all. 

He could get used to this. 

#wkcnet #bts #bts fanfic #bts angst #bts series #bts taehyung #bts x reader #bts v #taehyung x reader #bts taehyung x reader #bts v x reader #v x reader #bts supernatural au #bts fairy au #bts fae au #affbttya #taehyung angst #v angst #taehyung fluff #v fluff #bts v fluff #bts v angst #bts taehyung fluff #bts taehyung angst #bts v supernatural au #bts taehyung supernatural au

[jennyviviandee]

Panel from manga-ka Kiyohiko Azuma's Azumanga Daioh (1999-2002).

Miss Yukari Tanizaki on the right represents how mentally I should view resting. Such as today. On a day off from work which became quite a pattern of energy-sapping awfulnesss during the holidays persisting on being so.

Because work has insufficient associates for grocery, no assistant manager in said department, and a new store manager that just arrived. Jinkies, that's a ton of transitions at once! Also, on top of everything else, I'm the only pure grocery stocker due to the other two playing dual roles (cashier, working in Vitamins). In short, work, at the moment, completely bites and destroys me: mentally, physically, emotionally, and socially.

However, my roommates have pointed out the store isn't hiring. If one checks. Perhaps it is hasn't updated yet though...?

*Fearfully, memories of seven months of unemployment come flooding back. That's what happened after my last job. ...That long of a drought was endured. I had to constantly fight for my unemployment money whilst I filled out so many applications (hundreds) resulting in few interviews until, finally, this specific interview for my current job I've obtained*

Conversely, Minamo "Nyamo" Kurosawa is accurately indicative of how my brain treats me concerning resting.

As in, I don't deserve it. In the slightest. Contribute to society daily, don't be home. Your lone value is your job: otherwise you are worthless garbage.

Don't get ill, we need you! You're part of this family! Wipe that visible tired drool from under your mask during a killer pandemic and keep on working!

I mean if I do legitimately become sick with something significant, we'd be severely financially crippled.

How many of us are one lost paycheck from such catastrophic ruin I wonder? Thanks to rent costs? Health or vehicle stuff? Too many I'd guess sadly.

Yes, I must get the forced capitalist system lobotomy, catch virtually no Z's, work until I'm sleep-standing or have an utter tear-inducing mental breakdown from too much stress versus genuinely resting.

...Even bloody now, all I can think about is how tomorrow is gonna completely suck. When I should be, without a doubt, slumbering by now (I'm so drained). Thanks to my scheduled commencement being later. When 8 hours was already killing us for truck days.

Still, remember, we all deserve rest. I deserve rest. Y'all deserve rest.

#azumanga daioh #yukari tanizaki #nyamo #personal #neurodivergent #absolutely exhausted #retail #journal #anxious as hell #kiyohiko azuma #captialism #minamo kurosawa #mental health #manga panel #resting #job loss #unemployment #covid 19

[levieske]

𝟐.𝟏 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐚𝐰𝐚𝐤𝐞𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠

previous - masterlist - next

Cora woke up feeling bittersweet. She rolled on her bed, trying to avoid the light that escaped into her room. After some grumping, she finally got up, closing the curtains midway through. The sun had woken her up earlier than she expected, but alas she suspected she wouldn’t be able to get much more sleep anyway.

Sneaking in the night before, Cora stumbled around until she changed her bloody clothes to her favorite graphic tee. She hid under the covers, staring at the ceiling for what seemed like hours. The events replayed in her head, the guilt eating her out for not being honest with Mikasa.

They barely exchanged any words after leaving the vault, Mikasa was probably too shocked to bring up what had happened. Her best friend would be either terrified of Cora or thinking she was playing with her. Cora wasn’t too fond of any of the options, but she hoped Mikasa would just get angry at her for “joking” like that.

Realistically speaking, there wasn’t exactly a way of explaining what she did without digging her own grave deeper. Cora didn’t fully understand it herself.

The girl massaged her temples. It wasn’t humanly possible for her to cover up everything. She shouldn’t have gotten Mikasa into this to begin with. She would have to deal with her later, as there were unfinished business with Mikasa’s vampire relative still, who was conveniently locked up in a fucking basement waiting for her.

Sounds like the perfect weekend. It checks all the boxes: sneak out with your best friend, visit a cemetery at night, trespass an old tomb and awaken an immortal being with unknown intentions.

Cora chuckled at her thoughts and finally decided to get out of her room to have a shower. Refreshed and much less bloody, she got back to her bedroom and put on a pair of wide jeans and a short-sleeved top. As she was applying mascara to her lashes, her phone vibrated on her pocket.

Marco

Heyy

When do I pick you up??

She completely forgot. Marco had plans with her that afternoon, they were going to try a new dinner near her house. Cora exhaled and threw herself on her bed, debating on her answer. It wasn’t like she could just cancel him; it was an opportunity she had been dying to get after all.

Cora mentally insulted the blood-thirsty man waiting for her.

Cora

Hi

At 7:30?

Marco

Perfect

She put her phone down. The blonde would have to be quick with Levi if she wanted her date to go right. But she was completely lost as to where she was going to find the blood to give him.

No, offering herself wasn’t on the table. She might be stupid for helping him, but not suicidal. Also, not homicidal, she wasn’t going to give him a random civilian to devour.

Cora laid on her bed, as she thought about it over and over again. She didn’t want to cause any harm because of her stupid decision making. There was still an option, one that wouldn’t be as bad as completely offering herself.

She inspected the cut on her wrist. It wasn’t deep, barely a scratch really, but it drew a little blood. If she were careful, she might be able to get more, just enough without bleeding to death and all. Cora exhaled and got her wet hair out of her face. She could easily off herself by mistake.

But it had to be done. Cora had made a promise and she didn’t want to get any other person involved into this mess. It was her mess, so she dealt with it.

The first step was taking a knife and a bottle from her kitchen. It was a miracle her parents had decided to go on their weekly walk earlier that morning, but she didn’t plan on questioning it. Cora then brought a disinfectant ointment and a bandage to her bedroom. She created some space on her desk for everything she needed, putting away her stuff and grabbing the journal. She safely stored it inside her bag. She had many questions for the vampire, but so would he.

She hoped he wouldn’t be too angry about having read his journal.

Cora swallowed when she had the knife in hand. She positioned it near her wrist, horizontally, as she moved her arms over the bottle. Applying a little pressure, she was able to make a cut. The girl bit her lip; it did hurt. But she endured it. Cora was able to fill a third of the bottle, more or less. It wasn’t much, but she was feeling dizzy and she didn’t want to risk it.

She cleaned and disinfected her wound, covering it with the bandages she had brought. Whatever she was planning on wearing that evening, it better hide the bandages. She didn’t want to worry Marco, or her parents for that matter.

Cora put back the disinfectant and washed the knife. She leaned over the sink in the kitchen, breathing heavily. Taking her hair out of the way, splashed some water on her face.

“Okay, it’s done.”

It was time.

She put on a sweater and grabbed her bag, reminiscing of the day she first saw what Levi looked like.

#attack on titan #levi attack on titan #mikasa attack on titan #levi #college au #Armin Arlet #levi aot #shingeki no kyoujin #snk fanfiction #snk fanfic #levi ackerman #levi fanfiction #eren yeager #Mikasa Ackerman #levi x ofc #vampire au #vampire!levi #Marco Bott #marco aot #marco x ofc #levi x reader #jean kirstein #connie springer #Eren Jaeger

[larkingaroundlondon]

Day 3 - Tower of London, Bricklane Market and a long lost friend.

Early Morning start to the day, hopped on the tube and headed to TOWER OF LONDON. We had a ton of fun and learned a whole lot. Listened to Rick Steves and went straight to the Crown Jewels as soon as we arrived @9:30 am. When we were leaving, the lines were about 100 people deep. Thanks Rick Steves ;) ( Sorry no pics allowed of the jewels) Went on a Beef Eater tour - the guy was super funny. Telling jokes about cutting people's heads off and the morbid stuff that took place. Hey history is history bloody and all. 1 hour and the tour was done. We walked around the place and saw a ton of body armor, guns, spears, swords and everything in between. It was really neat to be in a place so many kings and queens were - with or without their head.

After our tour at the Tower, we again took the tube down to BRICK LANE. What a fun street. Food vendors everywhere you look. THe sites and smells were aromatic and lovely. You could have your pick of food from anywhere around the world. It was quite an experience. Everyone was trying to get us to eat at their stall or restaurant. Telling us "It's 5 star come in".. well that worked for us later in the day. We went in and out of buildings looking at all the fun food stalls and seeing all the vintage clothes. Londoners ( or teens and 20s ) love their vintage fashion. Racks upon racks of slips, vintage nike, overalls, shoes and anything else you could think of. I think I may have a biz getting stuff cheap over here, up-charging them and shipping it all to London ;) HA ! Love the bookstores here. They have a ton of books we can't find over in the states. Picked up a book called " London Clay" -- a book about what's beneath the streets of london. Which is right up by mudlarking ally. Along with the book, i bought some really cute linen overalls. Fairly cheap here at the market.

Day 3 is when my feet really started hurting - so we took a break at a Hookah bar somewhere downtown where for the first time I smoked hookah. It was like inhaling watermelon flavored shower steam. Made me choke a few times, then I got used to it and it was super relaxing and pretty yummy.

We needed to leave shortly after to meet up with my friend, Lisa who relocated to London about 10+ years ago for college. She since has found an amazing job at a College and continues to live near the city center. A coffee date was planned and we met up for something cold on this very hot day. So good to see her and chat ! We haven't talked or saw each other since she left for london. We picked up where we left off and was so good for my soul to have the time with her. I was. blessed.

After a lovely chat and coffee, Dustin, Lisa and I went to get some Indian food. After many dishes later, and stomachs full we decided to call it a night. We said our goodbyes, "see you soons" and headed back to the train for the night.

Tonight was the first night I got in at 8pm - my head wanted to stay out but my feet said, " girl my feet are dead stop walking on them". 3 blisters later I gave them a rest and called it a night.

Tomorrow is my first day Mudlarking with a team from the Museum ! I can't wait and can hardly sleep. It's like trying to sleep before Christmas morning. Tonight will be rough, but oh tomorrow is going to be glorious !

Cheerio!

[trixree]

For nahtanha on Ko-Fi, who asked: Obi-Wan and Cody, with one or both of them off their tits with sleep deprivation and doing something utterly silly. I'd prefer war era fluff but plz go where your muse takes you 💜

General Kenobi laughs, a tittering sort of sound that means danger and immediately has Steady’s hackles rising. Their General, typically, does not laugh. He certainly does not giggle.

The transports that have come to fetch them off this sithforsaken rock have finally arrived. It has been a bloody and harrowing seventy-some hours trudging through mud and sulfur-reeking pits, carefully evading Sepratist forces because they had known that they were brutally outgunned. The only victory they could hope for was a quick escape, but a storm had prevented their rescue from reaching their ever-changing position, as the Seps did not stop marching just because they were tired, and they certainly didn’t care that it was pouring rain, either.

So the General laughing—nay, giggling—right as rescue is in sight? Not a good sign.

Steady forces his way through the tight cluster of troops waiting to board, gunning for the front of the crowd where Kenobi is… hanging off of the Commander’s armored shoulders and pointing at the design on the side of the LAAT.

Lots of battalions paint their ships—lots of them paint their ships with pinups, even. So this particular artistic rendering of Senator Amidala of Naboo isn’t even that shocking. She is a fairly common muse, as far as Steady has seen. The image isn’t even particularly graphic—typical pin-up stuff, really. Her clothes are tight, her skirts flowing out behind her, a blaster clutched in her hands such that her arms are brought in close and her tits are pushed forward and up, her expression is severe and her lips are as red as the lacy item that winks out from behind the billowing fabric of her dress.

General Kenobi is staring, pointing, and giggling.

“Oh, oh, Cody, can you imagine? He’d—he’d—”

The commander deadpans, “He would cry.”

“He would—” Kenobi splutters, hysterical. “He would cry. Oh, Anakin—you’d think that given the circumstances of his early upbringing, he’d be a bit less… conservative, no? Cody, Cody, did I ever tell you how terribly Anakin hates Quinlan Vos?”

The commander makes an encouraging sound. “The Kiffar Jedi? With the arms?”

“With the arms, Cody! Yes! The arms! Yes, well—” “Sirs, can this conversation be had in-air?” Steady interrupts.

Both idiots turn to him, Kenobi a bit sluggishly. It appears as though the commander is supporting most of his weight. Was he injured? Steady hadn’t noticed anything particularly urgent, but if the General can’t even stand—

“Of course, my dear. Of course.”

The two of them stagger—stagger!—onto the ship and boarding resumes as normal. Steady follows them at a close distance. Something is decidedly off.

“Quinlan and I, we’re casual, you understand. We’ve been so since… oh.. Our padawan days, surely. And Anakin just has a sense for these things, for any hint of…” Kenobi snorts. “‘Impropriety’, shall we say. Poor child—how he came to believe that sex outside of a monogamous marriage was so taboo, I have not the faintest idea.”

“A coping mechanism?” Commander Cody muses.

Kenobi gasps, all faux-offense, and then snorts. “My dear, are you calling me a slag?”

“No, I’m calling you a slut.”

“A slut is a slag! Boil, dear, tell Cody that ‘slut’ and ‘slag’ mean the same thing,” Kenobi insists. Boil shoots Steady a horrified look. Steady shrugs and mouths, I don’t know.

“Uh,” Boil says, eloquently. “They’re… the same thing?”

“Thank you Boil. Where was I? Cody, where was I?” Steady has seen his General in some fucking states—blown up, shot, drugged, concussed, drugged and shot—but never this manic before. It’s like he’s taken far too many stims; he’s wired and chatty and has lost his fucking mind.

“You were being a slut with Quinlan Vos,” Cody relays, dutifully and with glee.

Kenobi makes a face that Steady would, under extreme duress, describe as “seductive”. “My dear,” he drawls, leaning in close to the Commander’s bucket and aiming a sultry look at it, “Are you pining for details?”

“Never,” Cody says.

Just then, the ship shudders to life and begins to rise into the air. Both men stumble and now Steady is worried.

“Bucket off, Commander,” Steady barks. “General, look at me. Did you receive any blows to the head? Take any stims?”

“No, nothing of the sort,” Kenobi answers and shies away from Steady’s small flashlight.

“He doesn’t need stims,” Cody grumbles. “He has ‘the Force’.” The quotations are not so much implied as they are explicit. Vod has the same attitude towards all things Force-related as most men reserve for sharp objects near their gettse.

Steady often wants to grab his vod by the shoulders and shake him until the stupid falls out. If you hate the karking Force so much, why’d you have to go attach yourself to a Jedi like a fucking barnacle, you di’kut? Much like a tooka that has fallen in love with a fish, the esteemed Commander Cody is doomed to pine after a creature whose simple conditions of existence are incompatible with his desire to live an unmolested life.

Finally, Cody’s bucket comes off.

Vode have fairly dark skin, especially compared to General Kenobi. At the moment, the shadows under Cody’s eyes are so deep and dark that they make Kenobi’s look like child’s play.

“Fierfeck, when was the last time you slept?” Steady blurts.

Cody blinks. “Me or him?”

“You!”

“You look pretty terrible, vod,” Boil adds, grimacing.

Cody turns a glare on him that could curdle milk. “I always look fantastic, Boil,” he says with deathly menace.

“You do, dear, you do,” Kenobi affirms. And Cody, the idiot, preens under the praise.

“Answer the question,” Steady says, snapping his fingers to get them back on track. “When did you last sleep?”

“You’re not allowed to ask me that,” Cody snaps, practically growling.

“The fuck does that mean?”

“Is this a fucking medbay, vod?” Cody volleys back.

“No, but now that you mention it, it looks like you’re in need of a visit,” Steady says, saccharine. “Now answer the fucking question before I skip the bitch-fest entirely and sedate your ass.”

Cody looks at him. Cody looks at Kenobi. Cody looks back and Steady.

“Kenobi hasn’t slept in four days,” Cody declares.

“Cody!” Kenobi hisses, scandalized. “Cody hasn’t slept for more than thirty consecutive minutes in four days! I have the Force to sustain me! It is hardly the same!”

“Manda save us,” Boil murmurs. “They’re so stupid.”

As soon as the transport is safely aboard the Negotiator once again, Steady marches his two idiots to the medbay by the scruff of their necks, cursing the Jedi and Jango Fett himself in every way he knows how.

“Both of you are getting an IV and a solid twelve hours or so help me, I will be dunking you both in bacta just for the fun of it,” he threatens. “Now is the appropriate time to tell me how many stims you’ve taken and when.”

Steady won’t do them all the embarrassment of asking why they have elected to forgo sleep entirely—this is war and the pressures on the pair of them are burdens that Steady wouldn’t wish on anyone. He knows why they’ve deprived themself of rest to this extent. It’s for the same reason as his own.

“None,” Cody says, proudly.

Steady looks to Kenobi. “Explain.”

“Cody had… objections to the notion that the Force can sustain a Jedi far past the limits of their physiology. He elected to—what was it you said, dear? ‘Prove that it’s all banthashit? I can do that, too, cosmic powers be damned?’”

Steady takes a deep breath and attempts--Fett help him--to release his rage to the Force.

#I hope this stupid little absurdity satisfies! #thank you for the prompt! #speed commissions! #codywan #last one of the night! #(technically I owe fic to a friend but they haven't read enough of the source material for my answer to their prompt to make any sense)

[dokoni-mo]

She Truly Was || Muzan Kibustsuji x F!Reader

Summary: Enmu helps Muzan remember you.

SFW // Fluff with small amounts of Angst

Word Count: 4626

WARNINGS: *slight Mugen Train spoilers*, slight mentions of implied sexual activity, obsessive(?) behavior, Muzan is soft for one person only, some angst, mentions of injury, mentions of blood, I also barely proofread this lol

A/N: I've had this in my head for a while and decided to write it down. This is largely just a compilation of scenarios I made in my head to fall asleep at night when I was stressing over exams and stuff, all loosely thrown together with a plot. This is my first time writing for demon slayer, so please be patient! I also am basing a lot of my info about the characters on s1 of the anime, some of the manga, and the wiki. I apologize if something isn't accurate. tldr; I just think he's neat.

~~

Despite having lived through thousands of years with hundreds of stormy nights in the midst, Muzan Kibutsuji never learned to appreciate them.

Something about nights like those in Japan just never sat right with the demon. It wasn't that they were too dreary, not at all. Life as a demon was plenty dreary. On the other hand, it wasn't that they were to lively either. No one ever went out on stormy nights; demon or not. Perhaps it was just because the rain was another reminder of the singularity that was being a demon. The poignant pitter patter just seemed to have a way of whispering to whoever heard it, telling them the most unpleasant yet quiet truths of their lives.

After Muzan's bloody meeting with the lower moons, he had told Enmu his task Muzan had planned for the pitiful, weaker demon. Although he had doubts that Enmu could hear him over the sound of the weaker demon's screams of pain from the blood he gave, Muzan was pleasantly surprised when Enmu understood the orders the first time around. Seeing as though it would cause trouble if the lower moon started to go around bragging about his newfound power and job, Muzan decided it would be best to keep a crimson eye on the demon.

This is what led to the scene before Muzan now.

Muzan had taken Enmu back to one of his many properties scattered across Japan, this one being tucked away in a lush, quiet forest in the middle of seemingly nowhere. The lower moon had not said a word throughout the entire journey there, and still refused to say anything now. Most likely out of fear.

Although it had been a long day of wrangling the lesser worms he called pawns (or "moons" if he was generous), Muzan did not want to show any weakness towards Enmu by resting. To busy himself, Muzan decided to do the tedious work the humans have him do in the job he took to please his human wife.

That insufferable woman.

With his bowler hat placed on his desk, Muzan had taken a seat in his large, leather chair, ordering Enmu to stand at the edge of the desk and face the opposite way. And, for extra edge, he was not to say or do anything.

It had been about two hours since then. The room was filled with only the sounds of Muzan's writing and the ticking of the grandfather clock in the corner.

Although he ordered it to be that way, Muzan was already sick of it.

Peering his red eyes up from the papers scrawled below him, Muzan fixated his bone-chilling gaze upon the back of Enmu's head. Muzan could see the corners of the lower moon's mouth turned upwards as he faced the wall, presenting himself with an expression of dumb content.

Freak.

Enmu was definately a curious specimen. So eager to die, yet so eager to please Muzan. The demon lord would have been confused if he were not who he was.

Perhaps it was his own boredom setting in, perhaps it was because he wanted to feed his already gargantuan ego, or perhaps it was just because he was tired, Muzan decided to speak up.

"Tell me," Muzan said, his deep, smooth voice making Enmu perk up slightly, "Why is it that are you so loyal to me?"

Enmu took this as an opportunity to finally move, but not without some caution. The lower demon only turned his neck towards Muzan, along with a tilt of his shoulder. Muzan noted the disobedience of orders, but decided to let it slide this time.

The rain must have told him to be generous that night.

"Why, Master Kibustsuji," Enmu said, a faint blush adorning his cheeks, "It is because I am so delighted to be in your presence, and have my power be of service to you."

The demon lord felt his jaw clench at this, his red eyes peering up at the lower moon from under his abyssal lashes. Although Enmu had an... odd, way of putting things, Muzan always did like it when someone stroked his ego, even if all they ever said was the same banter over and over again. He was nearly perfection, afterall.

Muzan sat quietly and pondered Enmu's response for a second, before formulating his own.

"Your power, as you put it," Muzan said, his voice firm, "What is it?"

Enmu's grin widened, "Dream Manipulation, Master. I can enter, manipulate, or control anyone's dreams however I want to. I can use it to kill from the inside, eating a person spirit first and body second. I can also put people to sleep."

Muzan wasn't necessarily impressed by this, but he wasn't disappointed either. An ordinary power, really. Nothing that could ever rival his own.

However...

Muzan's gaze flickered down to the surface of his desk. A flicker of a long lost yet not forgotten feeling bubbled deep inside of his being. A mere spark of light, really, a piece of warmth he felt from long ago, lost to the wayside by the vestiges of time.

It was something Muzan thought he would never experience again.

Dream manipulation, huh?

It might be worth a try.

Muzan looked back up to Enmu, sharpening his gaze, "Tell me, are you able to give... pleasant dreams?"

Enmu was surprised to hear this come from Muzan to say the absolute least. He took this as another opportunity to disobey orders and turn to Muzan again, this time fully and whole-heartedly. The lower moon looked right into those blood red eyes, looking for any sign of a rare flicker of humor or joking.

Muzan's gaze was serious, poised as ever.

Muzan was being for real.

Taking a pause to swallow, Enmu allowed his soft smirk to return to his gray, pale face.

"Why," the lower moon retorted, "I can, Master, yes."

Muzan eyed the lesser demon for a good second at his response.

This move was risky. It could damage his image. Yet, if he was to do this with any of his pawns, he would do it with Enmu. Enmu seemed to have no intent on harming Muzan or his image in any way; he was far too loyal for that.

Besides, if someone were to question the might of Muzan, he could just prove them wrong.

Muzan leaned back in his chair, crossing one leg over the other and lacing his fingers together, wrapping them around his knee. His icy gaze still on Enmu, he spoke again.

"I wish to see a pleasant dream."

Muzan nearly rolled his eyes when he saw just how wide Enmu's grin had gotten and just how flushed his face got.

It was repulsive.

But, if it meant what Muzan thought it would mean...

It was worth stomaching.

After a breif moment used to compose himself, Enmu's smile faded to normal again. He pulled up the sleeves to his coat.

"I will give you a dream where you will experience the happiest days of your life over again, Master Kibutsuji," the lower moon stated, "Is this to your liking or would you prefer something else?"

"No," Muzan stated flatly, "That is fine."

Perfect, even.

Enmu smiled widely one last time, holding out his arm and pointing it at the demon lord.

"Sweet dreams, my lord." Was the last thing Muzan heard before falling into a deep, deep sleep.

~~

"Muzan..."

Despite his blood demon art being so much weaker than his, Muzan wasn't quite ready for just how Enmu put him into a dream like that. Muzan's headache had grown ten-fold now, and he could feel that his face was scrunched.

"Muzan..."

Slowly but surely regaining his full consciousness, Muzan could first feel that he was in different clothes than what he had been wearing before. These ones were lighter, softer, and much more airy than his normal suit. Squinting open his crimson eyes, he saw that he was in what appeared to be a long, dark, flowing kimono.

The second thing Muzan could feel was that it was rather cool where he was, and that he appeared to be lying on the ground. Sifting his weight slowly, he could then feel that his head was lain upon what felt like two soft, plush pillows firmly squished together.

The third thing, however, took him a little longer to discern quite that it was. At first, he thought it was a pair of chopsticks running across his scalp over and over again. Upon, further thought, however, Muzan was further snapped back into awareness.

Those were not chopsticks.

Those were fingers.

All too familiar fingers.

"Muzan..!"

Muzan felt a stir deep down inside of him. He recognized this feeling, this touch, this warmth. It had been so, so long since he had felt like this. How long was it again? It had to be an eternity ago. An eternity wrapped within all time time in the world.

Muzan was speechless. Muzan couldn't move. Muzan was struck from deep within, and nothing in the world could ever compare to its blow.

"Muzan!"

Although the calling of the demon's lord name had been going on for some time now, he was just now able to respond.

Tilting his chin upwards towards the voice's source, Muzan nearly fell to bits right then and there. If he was someone else, he would have wept deep, earnest tears at the very sight of the being above him. For everything and nothing surrounded him as he studied the bright, radiant face above him, and nothing else seemed to exist other than that smile.

Other than her.

Her.

Oh, her, her, her.

His beloved. His sun, moon and stars. The ground beneath his feet and the air around him. His joy and love, his woes and sorrow. His fears and excitement. His warmth and his cold.

You.

You were really here.

"I was wondering if you were ever gonna wake up," you said, a faint laugh behind your voice, "You were out for so long!"

This scene was all too familiar to Muzan. He had replayed it in his head countless times, as if it were the only record left in the world.

He knew what this day was, and he knew all of your lines.

How could he ever forget?

Every moment he had ever spent with you had been a blessing.

Right now, his head was cradled in your lap, your soft, delicate fingers combing through his hair oh so gently as he had slept. It was deep into the night, and ordinarily Muzan would not be sleeping at this time. However, your touch was just so relaxing to him.

Everything about you was.

Today, you and him had spent the night wandering through the garden of your home together, chatting about anything and everything. It was only about two months into your relationship with Muzan. Muzan had first come to your home with the intention of eating everyone within the residence, but once he saw your face, watched you, saw your heart, your spirit, your you, he just couldn't.

He just...

couldn't.

You were human, yes.

But Muzan didn't care.

He was in love with you.

Muzan had yet to tell you the truth about him, however.

But that could come later.

"Muzan, are you alright?" He heard your voice echo again, snapping him out of his trance. He saw your face painted with worry, making his own features soften.

His darling angel. If only you knew just how much it pained him to see you with anything other than a smile.

Muzan reached his hand upwards, steadily maneuvering his fingers to brush your hair behind your ear and cup your warm cheek. He was shocked at how real you felt, shocked at just how similar it felt to all those years ago.

Perhaps Muzan had to give Enmu a reward.

The demon lord caressed your cheek gingerly with his cold, calloused thumb, savoring in just how warm your flesh was compared to his. For the first time in what felt like eons, Muzan felt a smile adorn his handsome features. Not one put on just to appease the humans around him, but genuine. The type of smile only you got to see.

Only you.

"I'm more than alright, my darling." He responded, his voice soft and warm, without the normal venom he gives to his subordinates. A voice reserved restrictively for you.

Finally, you let a soft grin come over your heavenly face again, making all seven of Muzan's hearts swell.

"I'm sorry if I woke you up," you said, "But it's about to be dawn soon. I don't want you to get a burn, so let's go in the house again, okay?"

Ah yes, the lie Muzan told you. He, of course, couldn't be with you in the sunlight (as much as he wanted to). So he had told you that he had a rare disorder that made him extra prone to sunburns and heatstroke.

Just something to keep you safe from the truth.

His soft smile still adorning his features, Muzan gave you a nod as he slid his head off of your lap. Since you were on your knees, you were quicker to stand than him. Brushing off your kimono quickly, you offered one of your hands to Muzan to help him stand, of which he gladly took. He had long since forgotted just how perfectly your hand fit into his, along with how radiant your kimono made you look.

Once he was back on his feet, Muzan couldn't help but to hold your arms, holding you a few feet away from him to simply admire you for a moment, his crimson eyes doing laps around your face and body.

You were perfect to him.

Every single thing about you was without flaw in his eyes. Not one curve of your body was too shallow or too wide. Not one strand of your hair was misplaced or without poise. Not one feature on your face took away from your radiant beauty. And you had not one bad bone inside of your body.

Muzan was never one to believe in angels.

However, if anyone in any part of the world were to tell him that you were one of them, straight from the heavens themselves,

He would believe them.

~~

As soon as Muzan stepped through the door, his hand in your own, the scene before him changed in one giant, peaceful flash of white light.

Before him now was no longer the house that he had shared with you all those years ago. Now, in its place, was a beautiful, lush springtime garden, all dredged under the cover of the night. It was not devoid of light, however. There were a few lanterns afloat in the water of the stream, as well as some within the structure of the small bridge that went over top of it. Flowers adorned every nook and cranny of the space, and the occasional insect or bird would make a brief appearance.

A small slice of paradise, just for you and Muzan Kibutsuji.

Fearing that you were no longer by his side, Muzan turned his head. His fears were quickly subsided when he saw you there next to him. Your delicate hands were placed on the railing of the bridge, and your eyes were fixated on the calm water below, almost as if it were a window into the heavens above. There was a small smile plastered on your face, and the delicate lights illuminated each of your features so perfectly.

Muzan knew this night.

This was the night he told you the truth.

The truth about him, about his "condition", about where he went for days on end, about why he couldn't walk with you in the sun, about everything.

This was the one night Muzan had ever felt fear.

"Is it really true, Muzan?" You asked, your gaze still fixated on the water below, "Are you really a demon?"

Muzan felt his lips part in small surprise. Even though he had replayed this night time and time again in his mind, it felt as if this were all happening for the first time over again.

Enmu really was good at this.

Muzan wet his lips before responding, setting his gaze on your precious, beautiful face and refusing to move it, "Yes, my love. It is true. I would not lie to you about this, I..."

A pause to collect this thoughts, before he could continue, "I kept it from you to protect you, (Y/N). I did not want any harm to come to you. My darling, I... I love you. My love for you knows no bounds. You are the stars that shine at night, and you are the shining moon above. Each time I look upon you, all I can stand to think of is how deep my love for you runs. I... I need you, (Y/N). I do not wish for you to be frightened of me, my angel. I would never, not ever harm you, nor let any harm come to you."

You still weren't looking at Muzan, yet your smile had yet to falter. Muzan felt a bubble of nervousness in his gut. Although he knew your response to his words already, even thinking of this moment never failed to make his stomach churn. He hoped his words to you were enough. He doubted that he had ever said anything more truthful in his entire life.

After a long pause of silence between the two of you, you closed your eyes and widened your smile. Then, you opened your eyes again, finally turning to face your lover. You looked Muzan right in the eyes, seemingly unfazed that you were standing so dangerously close to the most powerful being alive.

You were so brave.

Your heart was so big.

Muzan felt so overwhelmed.

"Muzan," you said, your cheeks dusting a light pink.

What you said next to him, Muzan could never get out of his head, never forget. No matter how much he tried, he would never not ever forget your words in that moment.

Within that one short, simple phrase, the king of demons fell in love all over again.

"I've always known."

~~

Another flash within his crimson eyes, and the scene had changed again. Nighttime again, of course, but this time within the confines of the bedroom you and Muzan shared. Both you and Muzan were nude, sans the blanket that covered the lower half of your forms. Muzan was on his back, one strong arm wrapped around you, the other cradling the back of his head. Your legs were intertwined with his, and your hair and hands were sprawled out on top of his lean, muscular chest.

Muzan knew this night as well.

It was his most loved night with you, but also his most dreaded.

How cruel fate was.

Stroking your back with the tips of his fingers, Muzan stared up at the ceiling above the two of you. Your body was flush against his, and as warm as ever. He wondered to himself if he was making you cold. If he was, you didn't seem to mind.

After a long period of savoring the silence between you and him, you softly snorted out a cute, soft giggle. This made Muzan angle his chin downward to look at the top of your head.

"What is it?" He questioned.

You giggled again, tilting your head up to look at him. Smiling, you turned your body to lay on top of the demon king, your breasts smushing against his own. Instinctively, Muzan laid his hands on your hips, rubbing small circles into them as he held you in place.

"I just find it funny that even though you profess to have so much stamina, you get tired after only two rounds." You explained to him, a playful mischievousness in your tone and eyes.

Muzan breathed out a smile, reaching up a clawed hand to brush your hair out of your face.

"As I recall it, you were the one complaining it was too much." He quipped back.

You snorted, "As if that ever stopped you before."

The demon let out a soft chuckle, leaning forward to give you a kiss on the forehead. Muzan couldn't remember ever laughing so genuinely before you came along. You truly were the light of his life. You filled his days with the sunlight he had long since forgotten, as well with the warmth no other demon could ever have.

He loved you.

He loved you he loved you he loved you.

And he still did.

He watched as you dropped your gaze to his chest, running your fingers along the flesh.

"Muzan..." you said, your voice more serious than before, "I've been thinking a lot lately..."

The demon king hummed, brushing more hair from your face.

"What has been on your mind, my love?" He asked.

You paused for a second before continuing on. Muzan could practically see the gears turning in your head.

"Well, I... I'm not getting any younger, you know, and I've been thinking. I... I really love you, Muzan. You're the only person I can imagine myself being with for the rest of my life. The other day, I was in town, and I saw the cutest family ever with a husband and a wife and two adorable little children, and it made me think..."

You looked up at him again, giving him a soft smile.

"What if we were to have a family of our own?"

Muzan could feel the same sense of joy, love, and pride in his chest as he did this same moment all those years ago. In this moment, he had never felt closer to you before, nor could you recall ever looking more beautiful.

He wanted nothing more than to be a family with you for the rest of eternity.

"Darling, you know what that would mean, correct?" He questioned you. He had told you long before that demons could only have offspring with other demons, for a demon baby would eat its human mother from the inside and kill her. It was gruesome, and had originally made you cringe at the thought. Muzan had thought your reaction was quite cute.

"Yes, yes, I know," you answered, "and I'd be ready for it. Even if I'm a demon, and even if I can never go out in the sun again or live normally ever again, I'd be happy knowing I got to be with you and our baby for the rest of time."

Muzan gave you a smile in return, his long, white fangs flashing in the light of the night. Leaning forward, he kissed you upon your soft, warms lips, gently pulling you closer to him.

This was one of the thousands of reasons why he loved you.

You were always so sweet, so kind and optimistic. He would admit, he did have a soft spot for you and you alone. But he didn't care. You were worth it. You were worth every single piece of money on planet earth. You were worth the sun the moon and the stars, and all the planets here and beyond. You were worth any injury, any heartache, and any trial or tribulation in the world.

The king of the demons unquestionably, unfathomably, undeniably, adored you.

Pulling gently away from the kiss, Muzan looked deep into your eyes, right past your pupils and looked right into your soul, your very being.

"I would want nothing more, my sunlight."

If Muzan could turn back the hands of time, he would have kept you here with him for the rest of everything and beyond.

For he did not know then that was the last kiss you and him would share.

~~

Another flash, and Muzan was no longer greeted with a visage of the past. Much to his dismay, the demon was now greeted with the sight of his office, with a smiling Enmu creepily watching him from across his desk.

What a fucking freakshow.

Taking in a breath of air through his nose, Muzan sat up tall in his chair again, rubbing the bridge of his nose with this thumb and pointer finger.

You were gone again. You were again nothing up a memory, a whisper of a time from the past.

Muzan could hardly bare it.

He had felt you, held you near him.

And just as fast as you came back, you were gone again.

This was a pain almost too hard to bear.

How long was he asleep for? Muzan really didn't care how long it was.

No amount of time with you was enough.

"Did you have the pleasant dream you wished for, Master?" Enmu asked the demon king. The lesser moon was lucky Muzan was in a somewhat good mood that day.

"Yes." Muzan replied simply, closing his eyes to rub them with his thumb, "Excellent work."

Enmu's smile widened at this, his cheeks turning pink again.

"Why, thank you, Master." He responded, his excitement prevalent in his voice.

Enmu really was a special one.

After composing himself again, Muzan scooted his chair forward up to his desk, fixing his gaze back onto his work sprawled out below.

Muzan just wanted to be alone again after that. He had been alone for years now, but he wanted Enmu out of the room. Although he could have easily ordered it to be so, he again did not want to show any weakness to the lower moon.

Christ on a bike. Muzan was so fucking stubborn.

He remembered all the times you nagged him for it.

Oh, what he would give to have you nag him one last time.

After a long bout of silence, the lesser demon decided to speak up again. He turned his head over his shoulder again to Muzan, trying to sound as naieve and innocent as possible.

"Master," Enmu said, "Where is she now?"

Muzan stopped his movements and glared up at Enmu with a venomous glare. How dare he even refer to you. You were so far above him, how dare Enmu even think to invoke your name.

Though Muzan wanted to kill the other demon right on the spot, he decided against it. He still wanted to see how Enmu would do on his mission. Also, Muzan had to admit that he did feel lighter and more generous after his dream with you. And he supposed it was fair that Enmu had his questions.

Feeling nice, Muzan decided to entertain Enmu's question.

Shifting his gaze back to the papers below, Muzan replied.

"Gone." he said, "The night she asked about a family was the last night I saw her alive. The next day, a group of slayers found her and our house. They knew who she was and that she was human, but killed her anyway. All in attempt to get to me. I found her in a pool of her own blood, limp and cold. The slayers died that same night."

Enmu's smile faded at this, his face taking on a look of shock. Closing his lips into a tight line, Enmu looked away, out of a quiet unconscious respect. Everything made so much more sense to Enmu now. Why the demon king was the way he was, his hatred for slayers, his cold-hearted, murderous nature.

It all clicked into place.

"I... I am sorry for your loss, Master." He said, his voice quieter than normal, "She seemed like a lovely woman."

Muzan peered up at the back of Enmu's head. Through his thick, black lashes.

"Yes..." Muzan said.

"She truly was."

#demon slayer #kny fanfic #kny x reader #kimetsu no yaiba muzan #kimestsu no yaiba #demon slayer x y/n #demon slayer x you #demon slayer x reader #muzan kibutsuji #muzan kibutsuji x reader

[goldenkirstein]

i've been on fire, dreaming of you

or alternatively, when both you and jean thought you lost each other

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anonymous requested: hello there! I love your stuff. if requests are open, may I request a canonverse post-rumbling jean x fem reader where y/n is wounded + passed out from exhaution after the rumbling and wakes up warm and safe, with jean tending to her wounds. Y/n is shocked bc she remembers how she almost lost Jean (she didn't get turned into a titan, maybe she isn't Eldian?) and she just shoots straight up to embrace Jean without realizing the intensity of her wounds. Jean gets extra worried so he has to gently guide her back to lying down on the bed because she has a fever and her injuries aren't all better yet 🥺👉👈 maybe they cuddle afterwards until she falls asleep or smth aaaaaa 🥺 pairing: jean x fem! reader wc: 2.7k+ tags: angst to fluff, cursing, female reader, mentions of death, blood and violence, hints of blasphemy (?), mentions of injuries, aot manga spoilers.

a/n: sorry this took so long, (i was shadowbanned) i changed up the request a teensy bit but otherwise i hope you enjoy !!

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Hot, burning, searing pain is the last thing you remembered before your vision went black.

That and the sight of the man you loved transforming into the one thing you feared the most.

Whether it was the heartache or the open wounds on your body that made you lose consciousness, you don’t know.

Truthfully, you were angry at Jean.

It was a whispered confession on the Azumabito airship. You and Jean sat in the corner, Captain Levi and Pieck in front of you, eyes cast away. The rest sat in silence, reeling from the situation that had played out on the ground below, quietly preparing themselves for the hell that awaited them at Fort Slava.

Jean’s hands were trembling; you would expect that after years of seeing your comrades die at the hands of humans and titans alike, you would get used to the death.

This wasn’t that, though; this was a different fear and anxiousness. Jean’s hands were clammy and his face pale; you could gauge that from one look at the man next to you, whatever worries were bubbling inside him were the accumulation of all the events from the past couple of days.

Jean was a collected man most times; as commanding officer, he didn’t have a choice but to be stoic and calm in the face of danger. But when that facade began to crumble, you would be there to ground him, remind him of why he was fighting. You knew that if you locked eyes at that moment, Jean would be able to see right through the front you were putting up, see the fear etched into your irises as you all were hurtling towards your deaths. So instead, you made the executive decision to swallow that panic and be that rock he needed, offering him your hand.

You took hold of his hand, staring ahead, and squeezed it three times, a reminder for both him and you that at least you still had each other. You could feel his eyes on you after you performed the simple gesture, but you continued to look ahead, focusing on the clouds, knowing that a couple of meters below, havoc was being wreaked by those mindless titan drones.

He said it so faintly, so lightly that you barely heard it past the sounds of the engine reverberating around the metal cabin.

“I’ll love you now and forever, even when I’m a pile of burnt bones.”

It’s like he knew. It was his way of saying goodbye to you. And you ignored him.

You clenched your jaw and pretended that you didn’t hear, pushed it to the back of your mind because this was no place for hushed confessions of love and, even more so, goodbyes. You were sure as hell were not letting Jean say goodbye to you. There would be no reason to, not if you had it your way. The both of you were bound together, and goodbyes were never to be uttered between the both of you.

Even when I’m a pile of burnt bones.

Is that what remains of him now? The muscle, sinew, and skin that pieced Jean together all reduced to ash and soot? The body that you had spent hours tracing, memorizing every detail of scattered in the wind. You would never feel the weight of his body on yours again, be able to graze your fingers over the scars littered on his torso, feel the way his heart would beat against your hands.

Jean Kirstein would only exist in your mind from now on.

He had left you alone with nothing but his memory, but even then, it was plagued by the image of a senseless titan taking the shape of Jean.

You wished to go back and tell him to shut up, never to utter those words again. Tell him to get those foolish notions out of his head, slap your hands over his mouth, silencing him, so that you could continue to live in your deluded reality that both of you would make it out alive. Tell him that he was selfish, of leaving you here to endure this torment by yourself.

Would that stop the scathing agony you were feeling?

Maybe this was hell you were in, you thought. That you were being punished for ignoring him, that you were the foolish one. Perhaps you should’ve held him tight to you, found a way to fold himself into you, so you wouldn’t have to suffer alone. Were you angry at Jean, or was that resentment directed at yourself?

The pain spread from your chest to your arms, down your legs, coursing through your veins.

You should have looked at him, told him that you were just as scared; maybe that could have changed his fate. If only you repeated those words back to him. He would still be here now.

I’ll love you now and forever.

I love him. I love him. I love him.

Bring him back to me.

The silent prayer came from the depths of your heart; whether God or who knows what would hear it, you didn’t know, but the thought of having to live with this ache was enough for you to continue repeating the mantra in your head.

--

Jean looked at your unconscious form that laid next to his seat. If it wasn’t for the gentle rising and falling of your chest, he could have sworn you were dead.

The thought sent a chill down his spine.

Jean had made peace with the fact that he would die when he transformed into a titan. Seeing you, like this, however, barely grasping onto your own life, made his body ache; he was okay with dying, but the thought of having to live without you was a fate worse than death.

He reached over to grab your hand and rubbed his thumb over the back of your palm before grasping it and squeezing it three times. He let go of it, placing it back gently over the top of your torso.

It was time to change your bandages and clean your wounds. Jean was a strong man; he had seen firsthand what a titan could do to one’s body, but his hands quivered as they unwrapped the bloodied bandages from your thigh. One singular thought overcame his mind.

Was he the reason that you were injured this badly? Did he hurt you?

Jean had spent many nights tending to your injuries, his hands careful when it came to you. However, the cuts and gashes he would tenderly patch up would always be inflicted by other humans or titans. Never did he think that his hands would be capable of hurting you. Jean was disgusted with himself as he stared straight ahead at his hands, now covered in blood.

The worst part of this, Jean thought, was that he couldn’t even remember if he was responsible for this, or maybe, that was a blessing. Recalling the situation would drive him into madness. The man winced at the thought of his arms tearing up your body.

He reached over to the tiny side table holding the medical supplies, grabbing the antiseptic solution. Dabbing it on a cloth, he attentively cleaned the wound, instinctively checking for your reaction. You would always make a fuss when he would apply it, but Jean averted his eyes once he realized that there was no reaction from your comatose form.

Usually, he would scold you when you would pull back from his hands when he tended to your wounds, but now any response would be better than having to tolerate the silence in the tiny room.

Jean got up to clean his hands in the basin, warm water turning red once he dipped his hands in. This was his punishment; he would have to suffer the consequences of his actions. The both of you were alive; Jean knew that he should be grateful, get on his hands and knees and thank the gods above. However, why should he be thankful? It was cruel. The both of you were not alive by the grace of God; this wasn’t mercifulness or benevolence.

What good is living if you have to sit and watch the one you love the most deteriorate in front of your eyes.

“You need to sleep; this isn’t healthy.” Connie was standing in the doorway with his arms crossed. Although he was speaking to Jean, his eyes were transfixed on you.

Jean didn’t need to look at himself to know how terrible he looked. His eyes were bloodshot and puffy, his face pale and gaunt. He spent his days and nights in your room, never wanting to miss the moment when you would wake up.

If. If you woke up, not when. Even that was not guaranteed.

“I’m not leaving her side, Connie.” Jean dried his hands on the cloth next to the basin. He turned his head to look at his friend, whose eyes were now staring back into his.

Connie understood the situation; he wanted you to wake up as well, but it pained him to see Jean suffer like this, “Spending your days sitting next to her waiting for her to wake up won’t help her, Jean.”

“You don’t think I fucking know that?” Jean slammed his hand down on the basin, hair falling in front of his face. Connie’s eyes widened at his friend’s action; to say that Jean was frustrated would be an understatement.

“You got your mom back, Annie got to see her dad, even those damn kids found each other. I got her back, but it’s my fault she’s like this.” Jean gritted his teeth, lip quivering.

Connie’s heart sank; he had seen Jean at his worst, but this was almost unbearable to witness. He made his way over to the hunched-over man and squeezed his shoulder.

“It’s not your fault Jean. This is difficult, believe me, I know, but you can’t be blaming yourself.” Connie’s eyes flickered your form, and he clenched his jaw.

Jean shifted his head, sullen eyes peering at your face through strands of hair; the man shook his head as a sob escaped his lips, “I need her to wake up Connie. I can’t live without her; I don’t know how to.”

--

You felt a gentle breeze on your face and an odd pressure around your ribs. Laying still for a moment, you waited for the pressure to subside, but instead, it made its way down to your thigh. You tried to open your eyes, but it was as if they were glued shut; there was no strength left in your body.

How many days had it been? Where were you?

Questions circled amidst your clouded mind as you lay immobile. You realized that the pressure you were feeling on your body was the weight of someone’s hands. How badly were you injured?

Memories flooded into your mind as you became aware of the situation you were in currently. Someone had rescued you at Fort Slava, and you were being treated at a medical facility by nurses. No, not nurses; the hands felt oddly familiar. They were careful and precise in their movements but carried tenderness as well.

You tried to take a deep breath in, to gather strength to move any one of your limbs, but paused immediately as the pain in your ribs was far too great. Shallow breaths would suffice for the time being. You began to focus on moving your fingers, channelling whatever energy you had left to at least get them to move.

The sheets underneath your fingers were soft as you gently moved your digits along the fabric. The hands on your thigh briefly paused before continuing their movements. You waited a minute before moving again, this time lifting your hand.

You couldn’t feel the hands on your body anymore.

Whoever had been treating your wounds whispered your name. It was a man, but you weren’t able to recognize their voice as everything was still groggy.

The man sharply inhaled, his voice shaking as he said your name once again.

You mustered the strength to open your eyes; your eyelids were heavy and hard to fight to keep open. The room was blurry and far too bright for your liking, but you continued to blink, and soon, the details surrounding you came into focus. The figure was still, waiting for your next move; you lolled your head to the side to get a better look at him.

“I’m sorry, I’m so sorry.”

He slowly came into focus; he was holding your hand between his and planting kisses on the back of your palm.

Why was he apologizing? Who was he?

Your heartbeat quickened as his voice became more apparent; this had to be some sick nightmare. You slowly sat up and reached out to him to cement the fact that this couldn’t be real. Your hand made contact with his knee; he was warm, he was alive.

Tears were running down your cheeks as your eyes scanned up his frame until landing on his face. Jean stared back at you, eyes wide, your hand still held in his.

Your face contorted as you took in the sight in front of you; you were so sure you had lost him, and yet here he was. Sitting up fully, you used your free hand to grip on to his white button-down and pull him into you with whatever remaining strength you had. Jean dropped your hand, and you swiftly wrapped both of your arms around him, eyes fluttering shut to take in his presence.

A pile of burnt bones.

It wasn’t a dream; you could feel his heartbeat against your body, feel his hair against your cheek. You sobbed into the crook of his neck, ignoring the immense pain you were feeling, scared that if you let him go, he would scatter in the wind.

“Jean, I’m sorry, I love you, I’m sorry, I should’ve told you-” Your voice was scratchy and hoarse, still weak from the slumber which had woken from a few minutes ago.

He brought a hand up to rest against your head, “I’m the one who’s sorry; why are you apologizing?” Jean pulled away from you, causing you to wince.

You furrowed your brows in confusion; he gently laid you back down on the bed before continuing, “I hurt you when I transformed into a titan; I’m the one who’s responsible-” Jean paused, his eyes landing on the gauze on your upper leg.

He wasn’t making any sense to you; shaking your head, you frowned at him, “What do you mean? I saw you transform before I passed out; I got injured by the rubble falling from the fort.”

“I should be apologizing, not you. When we were in the airship, you told me you loved me, and I ignored you, Jean, and then I thought you died and lost you. I’m terrible-” You looked up at him through teary eyes; Jean wiped your tears before kissing your cheeks.

“All this time, I was scared that I had almost killed you, and here you thought that I was dead.” He whispered, hands caressing your cheek.

“You’re not dead right; if I close my eyes, you’ll still be here?” You brought your hand up to hold his, letting out a shaky breath.

“No, my love, I’m not dead, and I’m not going anywhere.” Jean pressed a light kiss to your forehead. You cautiously sat up before moving over slightly to make room for him on the small bed.

“Can you lie here with me? Don’t wanna let go of you yet.” He nodded his head before getting up from his seat to lie next to you.

You placed your head on his chest, eyes fluttering shut. Your hand traced the buttons on his shirt, slowly getting lulled to sleep by the sound of his steady heartbeat.

Jean’s fingers skimmed your side; overwhelming happiness filled his chest; he was relieved that you were alright and that he hadn’t been the one at fault for your current state. He felt you press a kiss where his heart was, and his lips curled into a smile.

“You know why I said what I said on the airship?”

“Hmm, why?” Your ears piqued in interest.

“Because I knew that even if I died, I’d find you again, somehow somewhere.”

You let out a sigh, silently thanking whoever it was that answered your prayers.

I love him and you brought him back to me.

a/n: i hope you enjoyed this !! any feedback is appreciated !! i tried something a little different than how i usually write, so please don't be shy to tell me if you liked it or not and what could be improved !!

also i apologize for not being active these past couple of days, my tumblr went haywire and i was shadowbanned, its all fixed now but again super sorry !!

taglist: @c0urtn3y, @depressedbisexual, @dai-tsukki-desu, @clean-soap, @nevcrmxre, @conniesspringersgf, @glittrkink

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As always, please leave a like/reblog if you enjoyed this, I appreciate it lots <33

#jean kirstein x reader #jean kirschtein x reader #jean kirschtein #jean kirstein #attack on titan #aot #aot x reader #aot fluff #jean kirschtein imagine #jean kirstein fanfiction #jean kirstein fluff #jean kirstein imagine #jean kirschtein x you #jean x y/n #snk #snk x reader #snk imagines #jean kirstein x you #jean kirschtein x y/n #jean kirstein x y/n #attack on titan x reader #my writing #jean kirstein angst #jean angst #jean fluff #jean kirschtein angst #jean kirschtein fluff #aot angst #snk angst #connie springer

[youryanderedaddy]

I like your posts, it's always cool. May i ask a yandere concept between an innocent, protected princess and a prince who obsessed with her from the first time they met, and force against her will. Thanks so much, love your writing :3

Thanks, anon, that means a lot <3 If you haven't noticed, I am oBseSSed with royalty stuff so I rlly enjoyed writing this. It's slightly different tho, but the idea is there.

Title: We all fall down

tw: female reader, non - consensual touching, obsessive behavior, coercion, implied forced marriage, war mention, abuse of power

It was cold when you woke up, terribly so. The room was spacious enough, there was bright sunlight coming from all four windows on each wall and you were sure that your sheets were warm and puffy even without looking down at them, yet it still felt freezing. You soon realized the place wasn’t simply cold, it was different too. It looked nothing like your own room back at the Southern Palace with its countless colourful pictures, books shattered all over the ground and a fireplace just across the queen – sized bed. Before you had a chance to sigh in annoyance, a quick glance to the other side reminded you of the bigger problem. Him.

“Good morning, princess.” The man greeted you cheerfully, his voice still deep and husky from the early hour. He was laying against the wooden doorframe, the sly smirk you had grown to hate over the years once again adorning his red lips. You stared at him for a moment, then rubbed your eyes to chase the fatigue away, fruitlessly so. You were too tired and sleep – deprived to play – pretend, which of course didn’t go unnoticed by the nobleman.

“You don’t look too well, princess.” He teased with a cheeky grin and walked towards the bed, stopping just before his legs hit the edge of the frame. You puffed softly, but remained quiet just so you wouldn’t have to answer him just yet. “And look at your state, darling…” The heir continued, clicking his tongue in a mocking “tsk, tsk,tsk”. “Your nightgown is a mess, I can see all of your beautiful curves.” The heir paused to lick his lips in a disgusting, suggestive way, and you had to repress the need to vomit all over the beautiful yellow sheets. “In our kingdom such appearance counts as an invitation, did you know that?” He added, smiling sharply, like a wolf in sheep’s clothing, satisfied at the way his words made you embarrassed, flustered and jumpy so early in the morning.

“Your Highness, I would like to properly remind you that it was you who forced me to drink and dance all night.” You responded heatedly, all while fixing the straps of your silky dress to at least cover your cleavage. “You wouldn’t let go of my hand for a second. It’s your fault that I look like this.” You remarked, slightly offended by the man’s jokes, despite being used to his terrible humor after all those long years of shared parties and celebrations.

“If that is really so, my lady, please let me make it up to you.” The prince replied in the same smooth, carefree voice of his, the one he used before while talking to the maids and the peasant girls he wanted to bed. It made you sick to think of yourself as just another of his conquests, even though it couldn’t be further from the truth – you couldn’t stand the dark – haired male, his arrogance and absolute ignorance. “Join me for breakfast and I shall have our best cook serve your favorite meal.” The heir announced and winked at you before turning on his heels and finally leaving the room without hearing whether you agreed to his offer or not. You didn’t even have the chance to ask him how he knew what your favorite dish was or why he entered your room without permission, such a lack of manners was unsuited for a soon-to-be king. Perhaps you could use his inconsiderate behavior as an excuse to stay in bed until lunch but deep down you knew it was pointless. The egotistic little bastard knew you had no choice since you two had a lot to discuss.

---

The breakfast, if not anything else, was rich and delicious, each bite tasty and mouth – watering. The sweet aroma of cinnamon tea, vanilla and powdered sugar filled your senses with ease and a little bit of nostalgia for your childhood. The hardest part was yet to come, you wanted to deal with it fast and go home as soon as possible. As for Arthur, it was the first time you saw him serious with his brows arched and his thoughts all over the place. The uneasiness came back with full force.

“I think you know what we want, princess.” The male declared sternly after looking at the map for a while. His eyes were blue and clear, piercing in the way they were focused on you and you alone with no one else in the hall to act as a barrier between you and the monster. You understood why it had to be only you two, but these deals were always an open secret in both kingdoms, so there weren’t many reasons to keep the tradition going. “We want our territory back. We want you to surrender.” The heir hissed eerily under his breath, his pupils fixed on your frame, burning the skin underneath the thick layer of rough fabric.

You didn’t know how to respond to this – the dynasty’s requests had always been ridiculous and far – fetched, but never as impossible as this one. Yes, your land used to belong to the East centuries ago, but after several long, bloody, sacrificial wars where many of your men lost their lives, it was won fair and square. Now all your subjects lived there happily and freely, rightfully so.

“Your Majesty, please don’t dwell on the past. It will never come back.” You responded shortly after, laughing nervously at the end, hoping that would be enough for Arthur to drop the subject. Unfortunately, this wasn’t the case.

“Is that so, dearest? You have two weeks then.” The prince said coldly, narrowing his eyes like a fox. You opened your mouth to speak but quickly got cut off. “Prepare your troops, train the soldiers, announce the incoming war to your people.” The man chuckled darkly and threw the map all the way across the room. “You better get ready for a thunderstorm.” He added just to mess with you some more, just to see your face turn white from the shock and the panic.

“You can’t do that!” You shouted out suddenly and stood up from your chair, feeling cornered and suffocated. You hated the prince’s constant teasing and flirty remarks but you would have never guess him to be a cold-blooded conqueror. “This is too cruel even for you!” You screamed, the tears already blooming down your cheeks, hot and wet. Arthur spared you one condescending look before moving closer and trapping your body against the table, towering over you both physically and metaphorically, as if saying “Let’s see who has the stronger mind.”

“I will get what I want no matter the cost and there is little you can do to stop me, princess.” The heir pronounced slowly, tilting your chin up so you had no choice but to meet his hard gaze, full of intense yet unreadable emotion. There was nothing left of the sly cheerful boy standing against your doorframe, teasing you about meaningless little things, and you almost missed him now. “But what you can do is stop the needless violence and bloodshed, Y/N.” You despised the way your eyes lit up at his words, but, as always, your duty was above your comfort and happiness. “What can I do?” You uttered quietly, a part of you too scared to hear the answer, the other anticipating it.

“Marry me.” The prince stated in a deep patronizing voice. His eyes were dark and sharp, just like before, and there wasn’t a trace of his usual gleeful smile. He grabbed your wrists in a painful grip and pulled them up, holding them against his broad shoulders. “We can unite the kingdoms and live our Happily Ever After. No one has to die.” The man whispered surprisingly softly, his chest heaving with each passing breath. “I can make you happy, dearest.”

You gasped in shock as soon as the proposal left his lips. Every fiber in your body was frozen still, your whole being shaken up by the unexpected offer.

“Why do you want to marry me?” You asked frantically, squirming to loosen up his grasp on your hands just to feel it tighten up even more. This was going to bruise for sure. “Isn’t it obvious?” The noble exhaled slowly, staring at you, trying desperately to find the compassion and affection he hoped you had grown to hold for him over the years. His heart broke once he realized there wasn’t any, but it didn’t matter. Feelings could change in a matter of minutes.

“I’ve loved you since day one, my princess.” His attention drifted to your open mouth, especially your soft full lips. Oh, how much he dreamt of taking you and relishing in the whines and moans you would surely let out once he decided to claim you as his own. “All I’ve ever wanted is you.” The heir confessed, his face moving closer and closer to your own, forcing you to arch your back more and more until it hit the table. Before you knew it, he was pinning you to the hard wooden surface, caging you in, kissing you violently, furiously. You couldn’t breathe.

You couldn’t say no.

#yandere #male yandere #yandere oc #yandere male x reader #yandere oc x reader #yancore #yandere oneshot #male yandere x reader #yandere smut #yandere x you #yandere concept

[bvckys-doll]

Let me take care of you

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x female!reader

Word count: 2.7k

Summary: Bucky broke up with (Y/N) a month ago and she still doesn’t know why. When she decides to visit the HQ for the first time after their break up to get the rest of her stuff, the whole team is out on a mission. (Y/N) is not prepared to meet her ex soon after her arrival. Heavily injured.

Warnings: bloody wound. (Y/N) needs to stitch him up. Blood, duh. Angsty fic with a happy ending!

Author’s note: This one-shot sat in my Bucky folder for too long so now I finally got the chance to post it. Italics is the past. I hope you like it and might leave a comment in the reply section! PLEASE! Take care of yourself, stay safe and healthy! Cosplay the Winter Soldier and PUT ON A FCKING MASK!

You can find my main masterlist here!

It was a strange feeling to walk through the hallways of the headquarters without being able to call it her home. Bucky and (Y/N) had broken off their relationship a month ago and it was still hard to process everything. Normally she wouldn’t be so tense and would walk down the hallway without a bad feeling, but the bad feeling was omnipresent.

After more than a year of their relationship, it was Bucky’s decision to end it. It had happened out of the blue, but he thought it was for the best, as the missions were getting harder and harder each time and Barnes knew that (Y/N) was worried sick.

He had often come home in the evening and found her still awake on the couch. She could not sleep if she knew that the rest of the team was on a risky mission that she could not or was not allowed to participate in.

Bucky loved (Y/N). He still knew that. Yet he had never said it out loud. Bucky knew after the first three months of their relationship that he loved her, but he was too much of a coward to tell (Y/N) the truth. What if she turned him down? What if she thought they were moving to fast? So, Bucky kept it that way and tried to show her his affection in different ways.

But in the end, the former Winter Soldier knew he could no longer keep it from her. So, James chose the simplest method: to let her go. Of course, he knew from the start that (Y/N) wouldn’t just leave. After a year of dating, she wouldn’t just leave if Bucky told her to. She would ask questions, probably cry, and beg him to try again. There was only one option: he would have to break her heart.

~

With a broad smile on her lips, (Y/N) opened the door to her room, while trying not to drop the plate of the fresh cookies she had baked and brought with her.

“Baby, you’re not gonna believe what Sam just said. ” (Y/N) chuckled and put the plate on the coffee table next to the couch when Bucky came out of the bathroom. Before she could speak up again, she paused, and her eyes widened. His eyes were swollen and red. He must have cried. A lot.

“James, what’s going on?” (Y/N) approached him and put her hands on his cheeks. Meanwhile Bucky was clenching his hands in fists to prevent himself from pulling (Y/N) close. The next words that passed his lips would not only break her heart, but also him.

“I want you to go.”

“W-what? I don’t understand. Shall I go down to the living room and leave you alone?” (Y/N) tried to make sense of his words. Another tear ran down Bucky’s cheek. Immediately she wiped it away and watched him anxiously. Slowly, he grabbed her wrists and pulled her hands from his face, whereupon (Y/N) looked at him completely disillusioned.

“I can’t be with you anymore. We are too different” James replied and stepped past her as (Y/N) froze at her place. She couldn’t quite believe what he had just said. Before she could say another word, he continued and pulled the final straw “I don’t love you…and I never loved you. This...was all just a pastime for me to feel a little better after everything that’s happened to me.”

Her back was still turned to him as Bucky saw how (Y/N) now clenched her hands into fists as well and a sob escaped her lips. How he would have loved to take her in his arms. Tell her it was all a lie to protect her. But he didn't. He stood firm and left it at that.

Without another word, (Y/N) turned on her heel and left their shared bedroom, pulling the door shut behind her with a loud bang.

~

Since the confrontation, they hadn't seen each other or exchanged another word. Natasha had packed a few things and left with (Y/N) only a few hours later after the incident. Natasha hadn't spoken a word to him since that day either.

Meanwhile, (Y/N) had been staying in a hotel for the past four weeks because she couldn’t find a new apartment so quickly. In New York it is never easy to find a good apartment and most of them are incredibly expensive. Despite (Y/N)’s constant reluctance, Tony insisted on paying for her accommodation at the hotel because she was one of his best employees.

Most of the time she worked from her hotel room, which Tony fortunately allowed her to do. Still, (Y/N) knew it couldn’t go on like this forever. Sooner or later, she’d see Bucky and the pain would come back.

According to the team’s entries in the system, everyone was on a mission near Rio de Janeiro. No one had told her why and for how long, but she knew they were not back yet. At least, that is what (Y/N) thought.

Since she still had some clothes and other stuff in their old, shared room, (Y/N) wanted to get them before the rest of the team started running around the headquarters again. So, with a moving box under her arm, she made her way to the room where she entered the usual code.

Beep!

Pushing the door open with her hip, (Y/N) groped for the light switch with her free hand. Briefly, (Y/N) squinted her eyes as the bright light illuminated the room. Why did Bucky always leave the curtains closed when he was away?

With a glance around the room, her question was answered.

The room has been left in a great mess. His shirts, shoes and sweatpants were scattered on the floor and his bed looked as if he had just got up. The cushions were either at the foot of the bed or in another corner of the room.

One of the signs for his nightmares. Things that (Y/N) wouldn’t have to deal with anymore.

Murmuring, she made room on his desk and set the box down. The first mission: the wardrobe. One of the doors was already open and one of Bucky’s knives laid on the floor. She opened the other door as well and pulled her clothes and blouses off the hangers before carefully packing them into the box.

Now it came to the sweaters.

To be honest, she sometimes didn’t even remember which ones belonged to her and which ones to Bucky, since she had usually put his shirts on instead of her own.

While (Y/N) was busy with her other t-shirts, Bucky’s red Henley shirt fell into her arms. Sighing, she held the thin, dark red material in her hands and looked at the thin seam. She probably had to mend the shirt five times already.

Suddenly the door of the room opened, and (Y/N) turned around in shock when she saw Bucky standing in the door frame. For a short moment none of them moved and they just stared at each other. (Y/N) was still holding his shirt in her hand before she quickly threw it behind her on the bed.

“What are you doing here?” they asked at the same time before Bucky raised an eyebrow and added a bit abruptly, “I live here. What’s your excuse?”

“I’m just going to get the rest of my stuff. I’ll be gone before you can count to three”, she snorted at his tone “Actually, I was hoping that- …you’re bleeding.”

(Y/N)’s gaze went to his hand, which seemed to squeeze a wound. Not successful, however, because the blood swelled through his fingers. Bucky briefly looked down at himself, pressing his hand further into his side, and gritting his teeth briefly “No shit, Sherlock.”

“Do you think now is the right time to make jokes, Barnes?” (Y/N) growled in a serious tone as Bucky pushed past her towards the bathroom. He got out of his jacket and closed his eyes while gritting his teeth. In the bright light of the ceiling lamp, (Y/N) could see the blood in his hair and the slight scratches on his face. Apparently, it had been a pretty rough mission.

“Why didn’t you go straight to Helen with an injury like that?” (Y/N) watched him throw his leather jacket into the bathtub and then leaned on the edge of the sink. Before James was about to lose consciousness, (Y/N) quickly came up to him and wrapped his arm around her shoulder, while his other hand was still pressing on the wound. He had already lost a lot of blood.

With the last strength James had left in his legs, he made it to his bed with (Y/N)’s help, where he laid down and squeezed his eyes in pain. (Y/N) quickly ran into the bathroom and dug the first aid kit out of the drawer before sitting on the edge of the bed next to Bucky, who was breathing slowly.

“You don’t need to help me” his voice was raspy as his eyelids slowly dropped.

“Hey, you’re staying with me” (Y/N) patted his cheek “Where are the others?”

(Y/N) took the scissors out of the box and used them to cut his shirt open so she could get a better view of his wound. His voice was still raspy as he replied, "There were too many. They surprised us and we weren't prepared for it. Some bastard caught me pushing Steve out of the way. What's he got that stupid shield for if it doesn't even help?"

"Is the bullet still in there?", (Y/N) asked him as she pressed a couple of compresses into his hand so he could use them to stop the bleeding, which was slowly but surely receding. Relieved, (Y/N) slumped her shoulders as he shook his head before replying, "Helen wasn't there and I didn't feel like looking for anyone else. I don't necessarily trust the others. Clint flew me in quickly and then flew right back. I told him the wound was already closing up."

“This lie could have killed you, you know that, right? If I hadn’t been here, you would have collapsed in the bathroom and probably died of blood loss.” (Y/N) answered as she tried to get the thread through the head of the needle, which was not as easy as she thought. Probably it was also because her hands were shaking, which Bucky noticed when he watched (Y/N) “I would have made it somehow.”

But the way (Y/N) looked down at him was enough for him to shut up. Knowing it was a straight lie. And he had to admit that he wouldn’t have cared if it had happened like that. (Y/N) was gone. He had lost her, and that was all his fault.

Attentively James watched her as she prepared everything and checked again and again if the wound was still bleeding heavily. After it had slowly but surely subsided, (Y/N) removed the compress from his stomach and glanced at the gaping wound. Sighing, she took the disinfectant and dripped some onto a cloth before looking at James, who understood immediately before he said “I'm used to the pain, you know that. Don't worry about it. "

“You don't need to play hero here, James. I know how much that it hurts.” (Y/N) muttered, holding the cloth tightly before pressing it to the wound. Briefly, Bucky's chest heaved, and he growled in pain, breaking (Y/N)'s heart in the process, before she finally managed to take the cloth down and throw it away.

Quickly she took some of the numbing gel and smeared it around the wound before looking to Bucky, “I'm stitching it up now as best as I can. I'll have Helen look at it as soon as she gets back.”

Without another word from Bucky, (Y/N) began stitching up his wound. She was still shaking a little, but slowly it was getting better. Finally, she bandaged the wound with a compress and took care of the small scratches on his cheek.

They hadn't been this close in a long time. (Y/N) didn't even notice how she held her breath as she ran the disinfectant over the wounds. Bucky gritted his teeth again for a moment, but his gaze didn't avert from her.

Calmly, she stuck a band-aid over the wound and gave it another quick brush with her thumb as it blurted out of Bucky, "I lied."

Bucky watched her reaction carefully as she removed her hand from his cheek and held his gaze. His gaze wandered to the ceiling, kneading his hands nervously. He added, "When I said you were just a pastime and I didn't love you, I lied. That's not true. "

"Then why do you say such a thing?", (Y/N) asked him in a calm voice that didn't show if she was amazed, sad, or angry. Bucky himself was afraid of any of these reactions.

Desperately, he tried to find the right words "I was worried about you. This life with me could break you. You haven’t slept for weeks because of me. Because you're always so worried about me and while doing so, you forget to take care of you. When I…come back from missions, you're still awake because you want to know that I got home safely. You…you're too good for me and I don't want to destroy you like I've already destroyed everything else around me. I got you-. "

"You've already destroyed me, James. ", (Y/N) interrupted, looking at him with glazed eyes. This was exactly what he tried to avoid. He never wanted to be the reason why she felt bad, but now his worst fear had come true.

"You successfully broke my heart when you told me I was nothing more than a silly pastime you're done with now. I thought that you…I thought that we will go on like this forever. Do you know how happy you've made me? You were the one I could imagine anything with. I never wanted kids. I never wanted to get married, only to get divorced three years later. I never wanted this. But then you came along and showed me that there is a man who could make this all a possibility. A family. A life together. . . "

Tears were streaming down his cheeks when he saw her sitting in front of him throwing all this at his head. He had been such a coward. If he had just talked to her and told her everything, it would never have come to this.

But he was scared. Scared of being rejected again like all the other women did it before. But his (Y/N) wasn’t like them, but he couldn’t bear the thought that she might be.

“I love you, doll. I really do.” Bucky sobbed and wiped the tears from her eyes as (Y/N) looked at him and her eyes were just as swollen as his own before he continued, “I love you more than anything and I-I was stupid because I once again thought only of myself and…and not of the consequences. I love you and I don’t want to lose you. You’re all I have left. ”

Sniffing, (Y/N) looked at the man she loved more than anything. How he lay there on the bed, showing his most vulnerable side. He always appeared so strong in front of everyone so they would not see the real Bucky. But this man was so exhausted by everything that had happened to him. He didn’t want to have those thoughts. These doubts. That fear. He just wanted to live a happy and fulfilled life with (Y/N).

Slowly, she moved closer to him on the mattress and brushed the hair out of his face, which was still a bit sticky because of the blood. Gently, she leaned down to him and embraces him as best she could without touching his wound.

At first, he remained calm, then he wrapped his arms around her center and pulled her into his arms until finally she lay next to him in the bed. The two were sobbing in each other’s arms with (Y/N) running her fingers through his hair. Again, and again.

“I love you, James Barnes. So so much.” (Y/N) muttered as she buried her face in his neck while she was still fondled the back of his head. “But I swear to God, if you do this again, I’ll send Natasha after you and you know what she is capable of.”

“Of course, I know that. I taught her well.” Bucky mumbled while he held her close “I’ll never let you go again. I promise.”

#bucky barnes #bucky barnes x reader #winter soldier #sebastian stan #sebastian stan x reader #marvel #mcu #own writing #dont repost #one shot #fanfiction #fluff #happy ending #let me take care of you #bucky barnes imagines #bucky barnes imagine #own gif #giphy

[andvys]

Longing (part 17)

Warnings: angst, self destructive behavior, kinda self harm, kinda dark!reader

Pairing: Ellie Williams x reader

Author’s note: this took me way too long and it’s kinda rushed and not the best one I've written but I promise the next one will be better.

Opening your eyes slowly, you patted the spot next to you to find it empty, Ellie must've gotten up already. You noticed how tired and exhausted you were despite hours of sleeping. These past few weeks have really taken a toll on you and your health. Your body was full of scars and bruises and not just physically. Pain shot through your shoulder when you tried to get up, groaning you clutched your shoulder and fell back on the bed, looking up at the ceiling your thoughts drifted off to last night.

This has by far been the worst day since Joel’s death and you didn't even know what the worst part about it was. Torturing and killing Nora or fighting Abby and getting your ass kicked by her. You planned on killing her and yet you failed.

You were angry at yourself, you almost died yesterday and not just once and you only survived because of that boy. He prevented you from getting killed on the streets and he prevented you from getting killed by Abby, twice. You were getting weak and that was the last thing you needed right now, you had to stay strong in order to kill Abby, otherwise it wouldn't be her getting killed but you or even worse Ellie and Jesse and you would never let that happen.

Getting up, you ignored the pain in your shoulder and started to put on the clothes that Ellie laid out for you, you didn't even know where she got them from but you were thankful for not having to wear your bloody and dirty clothes again. Tying the laces on your boots you got up to find your reflection staring back at you through the large mirror.

Walking closer you almost gasped at the sight of yourself. Abby has done a good job on you, you were covered in bruises and new cuts that would surely leave scars. Your lip was busted and your throat was covered in dark purple and blue bruises. As if the big guy hadn't done enough, Abby had to leave marks of her own around your throat. You were surprised that you could still talk.

How could you let it get this far? No one has ever managed to cover you in so many bruises and you fought people twice Abby’s size before. You didn't even know who you were more angry at, Abby or yourself?

She was the one who put you in this state but you were the one that you let her. You let her beat you, you let her be stronger than you. You were so blinded by anger and rage that you didn't turn your logic on when you were fighting her, you just attacked her without thinking first. 

You were so incredibly angry at yourself. Your father would've laughed at you. 

‘how are you gonna survive in this world when you can't even defend yourself?’

Shaking your head you tried to get his voice out of your head but it kept repeating itself. You felt tears well up in your eyes, your breathing got heavier by the second and you couldn't stand looking at yourself anymore.

Balling your hand up into a fist, you punched into the mirror, breaking it, you sliced your skin open in the process but you didn't even feel it, you were consumed by anger. You just kept punching it until your hand was covered in blood.

Ellie was sitting in one of the seats, playing guitar when she heard the sound of glass shattering coming from the room you were in. Immediately she put the guitar down and rushed over to you, right when she was about to open the door, it was already pulled open by you. 

Startled at the sight of her standing there you jumped back slightly, blinking a couple of times, you went to move past her but she didn't let you. She looked at you in shock, her eyes drifted down to your bloody hand. She didn't know what to say, she could tell this wasn't an accident by the way you avoided looking into her eyes. 

“(Y/n)..” she whispered, with a shocked expression on her face.

“I’m fine, Ellie.” you mumbled, looking down.

“No you're not, give me your hand.” she said, grabbing your hand to examine the cuts. You didn't want her to see you like this but you knew there was no way that she would just let you walk away like this and you couldn't resist her puppy eyes anyways. “Alright, luckily there is no glass stuck in your skin.”

Pushing you back into the room she told you to sit on the bed while she went to grab some supplies.

“Okay, found some stuff..” she said, walking back into the room, glancing at the broken mirror briefly before she sat down next to you. Grabbing your hand gently, she started cleaning the blood off your hand.

You didn't even wince when she started disinfecting the wound with alcohol, too deep in thought to feel the pain. Ellie noticed that and eyed you worriedly. 

“Alright all done.” she said, grabbing your hand so you wouldn't try to leave again “babe?” 

Looking down, you didn't want her to look at your face, you looked broken and you knew it, you were supposed to look strong and not like some weak kid. 

“Babe look at me, please.” she pleaded, squeezing your hand. 

Taking a deep breath, you looked up at her, noticing the sad and worried look she had on her face. “I’m here, you can talk to me you know that right?” 

“I know.” you whispered. 

“I don't want to lose you (y/n).” she said, moving closer to you, she brushed a piece of hair behind your ear, looking at you with sad eyes.

Feeling your heart squeeze in your chest at her words you pulled her into a hug. “You won't lose me Ellie. I promise.” you said, holding her tightly.

She held onto you tightly, not wanting to let you go. She was so worried when you were out there all alone. She hated to think about you being in danger and she hated it even more that you were hurt and almost killed out there. She wanted to tell you to just stay here while she finished it but she knew there was no stopping you from going after Abby and you would never sit back while Ellie was out there on her own.

Pulling away you noticed the worried look in your lovers eyes, your gaze immediately softened “Ellie, I promise you that you won't lose me, I’ll be with for as long as I’m alive.” you said, pecking her lips softly. “We lost too much time with each other already don't you think?” you asked her.

She nodded her head, a sad smile tugging on her lips.

“Well it was kinda my fault..” you admitted ‘as always’ you thought to yourself.

“Hey we’re together now, that's all that matters.” Ellie said, bringing your hand up to her lips, kissing it softly. 

Your heart jumped at her saying you were together. 

“Together..” you trailed off “does that mean I can call you my girlfriend now?” you asked shyly 

Ellie’s eyes widened at your question, her heartbeat got increasingly faster. Never in a million years would she have though that you'd be the one asking her to be your girlfriend. She always guessed that she would be the one asking you that question. 

“I- of course, fuck.. of you can call me your girlfriend.. I mean I- always wanted to call you my girlfriend but- alright I will stop rambling now..” Ellie mumbled the last part. 

Smiling slightly at her, you leaned and kissed her lips softly, she grabbed your face and pulled you closer, kissing you back.

You probably didn't deserve her but you couldn't resister her, she made you feel alive, she made you feel safe and at home. Her touch was able to make you forget every worry that you had, she was able to calm you down even in times like this, she was like an anchor for you. 

Pulling away from the kiss, you looked into her eyes and all you could find there was love and adoration for you. 

“Come on, we have to discuss a few things.” you said, getting up, you grabbed your backpack and your swords. 

“Yeah hold on.” she said, grabbing your hand she turned you around and pulled you in again, kissing you one more time before you both had to go out there again.

Grabbing her waist, you pulled her closer, kissing her back.

“Hey sleepyheads I- oh my god... not again!” Jesse came bursting into the room and immediately left and closed the door again. 

Pulling away from her you furrowed your brows “what a dumbass” you said shaking your head. Ellie chuckled at you “He’ll never learn how to knock.” Ellie mumbled. 

“Yeah.. alright let’s go.” 

After you explained everything Nora told you about why they were after Joel you discussed the route to the Aquarium and were finally on the way there. It was raining and you could her the faint rumbling of thunder from afar. Ellie and Jesse were behind you, talking about Dina and the baby. You weren't in the mood to talk so you just walked ahead of them, keeping an eye out for infected or worse, people. 

You came to the conclusion that people were worse than infected. At least they couldn't help attacking you, it was their nature but people, they have the choice and yet they still do horrible things. Not that you were any different but at least you weren't enjoying this.

Perking up at the sound of voices coming from somewhere up ahead, you looked back at Ellie and Jesse motioning for them to hide. You ran behind a car, next to Ellie, pulling out your gun, you didn't even hesitate when you started shooting at them, the second you saw them. Ellie looked at you in surprise, this wasn't like you, you usually counted the enemies before jumping straight in to the line of fire.

She jumped up and started shooting at them too, killing one of them just in time before he went to pull the trigger of the gun that was pointed at your head. Jesse was shooting at them from the side.

They were quickly dealt with, you went to one of the soldiers and grabbed his rifle and his handgun.

Ellie and Jesse glanced at each other in worry.

“What the hell was that (y/n)?” Ellie asked with an accusing tone.

Turning around to look at her, you notice both Ellie and Jesse staring at you.

“What do you mean?” You asked, looking back in forth between them.

“That!” Ellie exclaimed, pointing to the dead soldiers. “That was dumb.”

Rolling your eyes at her, you turned around and went to walk away only to have Ellie pulling you back by grabbing your shoulder, you almost winced at the pain, she must've forgotten your injury.

“Don’t roll your eyes at me (y/n).” She demanded, looking at you with an angry expression. “This guy almost shot you.”

“So? He didn't, thanks to you.” You stated and turned around again, not wanting to keep talking about this.

You had to admit, what you did was stupid but you just wanted to get this over with as quickly as you could.

Ellie looked back to Jesse, not knowing what to do. He just shrugged and followed you.

After you encountered more WLF’s, you and Ellie parted ways with Jesse after overhearing a conversation about a sniper. You all assumed it must've been Tommy so Jesse went after him while you and Ellie kept moving towards the aquarium. Everything was going great until you saw more WLF’s fighting with another group, you wanted to get past them but they've seen your boat already and started shooting at you from afar. 

“Fuck this is the group I told you about.” you grumbled, you knew it was them by the way they were dressed. They all had long coats on when you saw them yesterday and these guys were dressed the same, so it was clearly them. 

“Let’s fuck em up then.” Ellie said, moving the boat near the house so you could go inside. 

Grabbing your your rifle out of your backpack you moved closer to them, they haven't seen you walk into the building yet, one of them was standing by the broken window looking for you and Ellie.

Aiming your rifle at her head, you pulled the trigger, her body fell to the ground. You heard more running down the stairs, aiming your gun at them you quickly shot them as well. This was easy. Too easy.

“(y/n)! watch out!” Ellie yelled

You turned around quickly, just in time to move out of the way when a man swung his hatchet at you. He grunted when he missed you, Ellie started shooting at him but missed when she was attacked by another guy, “Ellie!” you yelled out, you wanted to help her but you had to get past this guy first. 

You ran back, keeping distance between you and the guy in front of you, aiming your rifle at him, you pulled the trigger but it clicked empty. “Fuck.” you grumbled when the guy started walking towards you. You threw your rifle at him, hitting him in his face, you almost wanted to laugh at his expression. 

You grabbed both your swords out and waited for him to attack. He came towards you with a scowl on his face, swinging his hatchet at your head, you dodged it and swung your sword at his arm, cutting him deep with your blade. He cried out in pain but that seemed to piss him off even more, he lunged at you without swinging his hatchet this time but you already knew you won the fight when you saw his angry expression. Anger makes you stronger but it also made you dumber. He almost reminded you of yourself yesterday.

You ducked down and moved behind him, giving him no time to react you stabbed your sword through his back, the blade moved through his chest, he gasped and fell to the floor when you pulled your sword out. 

Turning around, you ran towards Ellie, just when you were about to help her she already stabbed the guy in the neck, making him grunt in pain. She pulled her knife out, blood splattered across her face making her cringe in disgust. 

“Fuck.. I hate these assholes.” she grumbled, wiping the blood away. 

“Me too.” you said, moving towards her you grabbed her face, noticing that she a cut on her cheek. 

She noticed the worried look on your face, grabbing your hand that was resting on her cheek she assured you that she was fine. 

“At least it’s not deep, it won't leave a scar on your pretty face.” you said, making her blush. “Even if it did, you'd still be the most beautiful girl.” you said, winking at her before you went back to the boat, leaving her standing there blushing.

She blinked a few times before snapping out of her thoughts, you always decided to tease her at the worst moments. Shaking her head, she followed you out.

You found an old arcade and were now looking for a way out of there. Happy about getting away from the storm for a second, your clothes were sticking to your skin, uncomfortably.

You were looking for supplies when you heard a load crash and Ellie’s scream. You pulled your sword out thinking she ran into infected or something you ran out of the room to find a large hole in the floor that hasn't been there before. “Ellie!” you ran towards the hole, looking down you found her laying there, grunting in pain “I’m fi- oh fuck!” she got up quickly “fucking bloater!” she cursed before running away. You saw the bloater go after her, groaning.

Your heart was beating so fast you were sure it would jump out. Putting your sword back, you prepared a molotov and lit up the rag before jumping down, grunting when pain shot through your ankle. 

Ignoring it, you ran towards the bloater and threw the molotov at him, lighting him up. His attention immediately turned to you instead of Ellie. He started walking towards you but Ellie grabbed her shotgun and shot him a couple of times, killing him. 

Looking at Ellie you were just about to ask her if she was alright when you saw two infected jump down from the second floor, rolling your eyes you grabbed your swords out “they are mine.” you said, Ellie moved out of the way watching you, one infected ran towards you while the other one still struggled to get up. You stabbed it through it’s chest, his movement stilled and you pulled your sword out, splattering blood on your clothes in the process, moving towards the other infected, just when he was about to get up, you swung your sword at it’s head, the blade cut clean through his neck. 

Shaking the blood off your swords you put them back. Turning around to look at Ellie, you noticed her staring at you “that was..kinda hot.” she said, scratching the back of her neck. 

Snorting at her “you think me being all wet and covered in blood is hot?” you asked, not realizing the way it sounded until you saw her smirk at you. 

Shaking your head, you turned around to move upstairs and search for a way out. 

“You gotta admit, that did sound kind of wrong..” you heard Ellie say from behind you. 

“Whatever..”

After some struggles with the boat and a tidal wave almost drowning you and Ellie you managed to find your way to the aquarium. 

“You okay with facing her again?” you asked Ellie, eyeing her in worry. 

“I should be the one asking you this but yeah I just wanna finish it.” she said, looking through the broken window before jumping inside.

You followed her inside, looking at her, you noticed she was staring back at you, silently asking you if you were okay with seeing her again. 

“I’m gonna be fine Ellie.” You assured her, squeezing her hand before moving further inside.

“hey, we can go crawl through here.” you pointed to the vents. 

“yeah that could work.” Ellie said, moving towards it, she crawled inside. 

Following her inside, you started crawling.

Suddenly you heard a weird noise and Ellie stopped crawling “oh.. no.” she grunted before the vent broke and she went falling down. 

“Fuck Ellie!” you called out, crawling faster towards the hole when you suddenly heard barking. Jumping down, you saw the dog on top of Ellie barking and trying to bite her, you quickly grabbed your knife out of your belt and stabbed the dog, throwing it off her. “Are you okay?” you asked, helping her up. 

“yeah, stupid dog.” she grumbled. 

You looked down at the dog sadly, you used to love dogs. 

“alright come on.” you said. 

You walked through an empty room, checking it out before moving into the next one. You found a bag laying on the floor, moving towards it, you crouched down and looked inside, finding a familiar necklace, it had a firefly on it and the name Owen Moore.

Your father used to have one of those too, he always had it with him, even after they kicked him out. He died with that stupid necklace around his neck. 

“hey what you got there?” Ellie asked, snapping you out of your thoughts, she came up from behind you.

“uh firefly necklace, belongs to that Owen guy.” you said, giving it to her. 

She examined it before throwing it back into the bag. 

“Let’s keep moving” she said, before leaving the room. 

You went after her, stopping in front of a door. You heard muffled voices coming from behind that door. Glancing at Ellie you nodded your head, telling her to go in. 

She opened the door quietly and walked inside with you behind her, you saw two people fighting they were talking about Abby. You definitely recognized them both from that day. 

Just when the women was about to leave she spotted you and Ellie, gasping, she backed away, alerting Owen who looked surprised at you two standing there. “Hands up!” Ellie ordered, aiming her gun at them. They did what she told, putting their hands up.

Pulling your sword out, in case any of them tried anything, you stood next to Ellie. 

“Where’s Abby?” Ellie asked, pointing her gun at the women.

You glanced at Owen who seemed to study your and Ellie’s faces. Realization struck his face “you two are from Jackson.” 

“Tell me where she went!” 

“How do we know you won't kill us?” the women asked, with a shaky voice.

“You give her what they want’s and we’re both dead.” Owen said.

“You guys can survive this, we just want her.” you said, hoping they would just tell you where she was, you were tired of killing people. 

“Bullshit.” 

Ellie pulled her map out, looking at the women “you. come here.” she said calmly.

“Fucking get over here!” Ellie said with an angry voice. 

The women went over to her, with a scared look on her face. 

“point to where she is on the map.” she said “and then you.” she pointed her gun at Owen “and it better fucking match up.” she said, aggressively.

“Okay..” the women said, looking at the map “what are you doing?” Owen asked angrily.

“She's probably dead anyway!” she exclaimed 

“It’s not worth it.” he said, moving closer to her “back off buddy.” you said, pointing your blade towards his neck, he immediately stepped back.

“point to where she is.” Ellie ordered, her voice was heavy, rage and anger filled her. You felt it radiating off her, you don't think that you have ever seen her this way.

“fucking point!” she yelled at the women, pointing her gun at her, Owen tried to move past your swords and grab Ellie’s gun but you were faster than him, you kicked him in his stomach making him gasp, he clutched his stomach, stepping back.

You heard the women yelp at the sight of you attacking Owen.

He straightened up and tried to punch you but you dodged his fist and threw a punch at his face, deciding to get this over with as quick as possible you stabbed your sword through his chest. He gasped out in pain, looking into your eyes in horror, you couldn't help but stare back into his eyes, you realized how terrified he looked. A shiver ran down your spine at the way he was looking at you. He started falling down to his knees, the weight pulling you down with him when he fell. Pulling your sword out you let him fall back. Looking down at him in shock you looked down at his dead body, his eyes still open. 

“oh no.. no...no..!” you heard Ellie mumble from behind you “oh fuck..” 

Turning around slowly you looked up at Ellie who was clutching her stomach while walking backwards, she looked like she was about to have a panic attack.

Looking down on the floor where the women was laying dead on the floor, you noticed her stomach. She was pregnant. Your eyes widened and then looked at Ellie who fell down on her knees. 

“Fuck...” you sighed, getting up you ran towards Ellie, dropping down on the floor in front of her, you grabbed her face in your hands “Ellie...”

She was sobbing, trying to catch her breath. “fuck Ellie.. breathe with me” you said, grabbing her face with one hand you made her look at you and put her hand on your chest “breathe with me Ellie.” you said, she nodded her head, feeling your heartbeat and your chest move under her hand. She tried to take deep breaths, your touch and your voice immediately managed to calm her down.

“You're doing great baby.” you whispered, pulling her closer when her breathing got slower.

You were so distracted with calming her down that you didn't hear the door open or the footsteps coming your way until you heard your name being called. Looking up you found Tommy and Jesse standing there, looking around you.

Jesse looked at the pregnant woman in shook, while Tommy made sure that Ellie was alright. He helped you get her up “come on, let’s get out of here.” he said. 

You grabbed Ellie’s hand and started to pull her out of the room. She turned to look back “come on, don't look Ellie.” you said, grabbing her waist you guided her out, glancing at Owen’s dead body one last time.

You weren't sure if you would recover from this. If Ellie would recover from this.

You have killed before but never like this. You would never forget the way he looked at you when you stabbed your sword through his chest. 

You always told yourself that you only kill when it’s absolutely necessary but was it necessary this time? You could've just knocked him out but you didn't. 

You were done with this, you didn't want to do this anymore. 

You just had to kill one more person. Just one person and then this all would be over.

#ellie williams x reader #ellie williams imagine #ellie williams #tlou ellie #tlou imagines

[dancingamongstdust]

Creepypasta Scenarios - First Meeting (Part 3)

I’ve opened requests now, if anybody is interested. Here’s the post:

Requests

Lost Silver

As stupid as it sounds, the game didn’t scare you.

It had started as a joke, something passed around your friend group after it had been discovered. The cartridge was just a janky version of a Pokémon game that was apparently spooky and so, everybody had taken turns messing around with it. They all said creepy things started happening but nothing too bad.

When it was your turn, you had been fully expecting something out of a horror movie. Instead, you had gotten a game that just had audio cut offs and weird notes warning you to stay out. It wasn’t all together scary.

You mentioned this to the next person you gave the game to in your friend group and they had laughed, saying it would probably ring true for them also.

But for some reason, your ally didn’t manifest.

Less than two days later, they practically threw the game at the rest of you and ran away sprouting things about curses. After that, the appeal of playing it kind of went away.

Nobody wanted to buy it and apparently throwing it out wasn’t a suggestion. So you ended up getting it.

Curiosity soon got the better of you and you booted up the game again, really sure that it would do something absolutely crazy but it never did. It ran like it always had with only that one file being completed.

So you deleted the file.

And nothing happened.

The next day, when you booted up the game, the file had simply returned as though you hadn’t deleted it in the first place. A similar thing occurred the next time. And the next.

Eventually you gave up and just started your own game. There, everything ran like it was meant to and you were beginning to think that your friends had all been imagining stuff. Maybe their paranoid got to them or something like that?

But eventually, the nightmares started. And they were bad.

You couldn’t remember exactly what happened during them. They were a swirling mess of games and glitches, horrible things spelled out in letters and blood covering everything. You would always wake up right when they seemed to be coming to a pivotal point. You’d find yourself dragged into a graveyard and then you’d wake up screaming

It was awful. You hardly got any sleep during them and they seemed to haunt you every night, keeping you up until the early hours of the morning.

But the worst only came when you didn’t wake up.

When you were dragged to the grave and looked down to see the ellipsis where the name should be. A punch to the gut that reminded you of what the game file was called. A confirmation of what was causing this dream.

You stared at it for ages before your eyes drifted up and you met his gaze. He was covered in blood, it leaked from every orifice and limb. It stained his dirty clothing even worse.

While you were staring, the world seemed to distort even though he didn’t. The game world melted away and your bedroom slowly reappeared.

It wasn’t until you saw car headlights move past your window – casting awful shadows across the room – that you realised you were no longer dreaming. He wasn’t a figment of your imagination.

The temperature in the room plummeted and you began to slowly reach for a weapon of some kind. He turned to look at what you were watching. His head tilted to the side and a glitch raced across his body before he vanished into thin air. Flicking on the lights didn’t show him hiding or cowering.

Perhaps your friends weren’t crazy after all.

Masky

“You know, if we had been a little more patient, none of this would have happened,” your sibling lectured. “We could be relaxing inside the car without having to worry about a bloody flash flood coming down from the sky.”

You shoved their back, forcing them to stumble a little as they went through the door. “Chances are the river’s going to burst its banks anyway. We would have been stuck in traffic for hours because the bridge is blocked off.”

“At least we would have been dry,” they muttered, running their fingers through their hair. “And not trapped inside an abandoned building.”

You rolled your eyes and made your way over the rubble to settle down on a camping chair. “Don’t even start. This place has been a hangout for my friends and I for ages. There’s never been a single problem bigger than a few spiders.”

“Till a landlord shows up,” they scoffed.

“Then we’ll move to the forest,” you joked. “I’m sure there’s a good bear cave we can use.”

“I’m going to be an only child,” they said, rolling their eyes. Still, they made their way over and sat. “How long do you think we have until the storm dies down?”

You relaxed back into the chair and smiled up at the asbestos-filled ceiling. “From the sound of it, a while.”

It wouldn’t have been the first time you had taken a nap in the building. You were scared of giant cockroaches coming to eat you once. You had gotten used to it since then but this time when you woke up, you were uneasy.

Glancing around, nothing was out of the ordinary. Your sibling was snoring in the chair next to you and outside the rain was pounding the roof.

You sat upright. Sometimes was definitely wrong.

Pulling your phone from your pocket, you got up from the chair and began walking as quietly as you could through the house. It had always been tiny and practically void of furniture, but the few rooms provided ample hiding spots.

Nothing but rubble was in most of the rooms but, in what you presumed had once been a bathroom, you found a person.

He had his back to you but when you pushed the door open to peer in, he spun around, his hand flying to his side. He was wearing a white mask, dark features etched onto it, and an orange jacket. A dark stain ran up the right side of it, emanating from under his hand. The oddness of his clothing made you immediately back away from the door, finger twitching on your cell phone in case you needed to call for help.

The two of you stared at each other in silence.

You were lost about what to say or do. The stain on his jacket was spreading and the more you stared at it, the more you became convinced it was blood. “Are you okay?” you finally managed to ask.

It took him a while to respond but then he nodded. The mask was unnerving you. You didn’t like not being able to see a person’s facial expressions.

“I don’t mean to pry or anything, but it really looks like you’re bleeding,” you said. “And quite badly. I can call for an ambulance or something although…” you turned your attention to the window behind his head. “I’m not sure they’ll be able to get anywhere with this weather.”

He stepped backward. “I’m fine,” he said, so soft you barely caught it. “I thought this place was abandoned.”

“It normally is,” you answered. “But we had to avoid the storm. I’m guessing that’s why you’re here also?”

“Yes,” he responded.

You waited or him to say something more, but all you got was silence. He had moved further away and now he had his back against the window. Part of you wanted to turn around and go back to your sibling but you were unsure about turning your back on the strange man.

The mask made you scared he could stab you or something.

Somebody calling your name made you turn your head on instinct. Your sibling must have woken up and realised you were missing.

Quickly, you turned back to the man, but he had disappeared. Rain spat through the now open window.

Nurse Ann

Everybody always warned you about exploring old buildings. They would yell about how many things could injure or kill you. Stray animals, drug addicts, old equipment, and all that. You had heard just about every warning imaginable. Ghosts were pretty commonly mentioned also.

But killer nurse was a new one.

“Come on, just give me a little more information,” you nagged. “I’m going there whether you’re with me or not so you may as well just tell me what you’ve heard.”

Your friend (and partner in crime for most ventures) groaned. “It’s not much. They just say that she guards the place and if you get too close, she’ll run you off with a chainsaw. Some people have died from injuries they got while there. Let’s just give this one a miss, alright?”

But you were not in agreement at all.

“Maybe she’s cute though,” you teased.

They didn’t find that funny and you didn’t push them to come with you. So later that evening, you snuck in by yourself.

The hospital was old with crumbling walls and smashed windows. It was hidden from the public by means of a tall barbed-wire fence and a substantial distance of open garden. Nothing too extreme for you and definitely worth the potential items you’d find inside. When hospitals went under, they often left tons of awesome stuff just scattered around.

You’d never sold anything you found in your abandoned building dives. They were more collectables than anything else but they meant quite a bit to you.

There weren’t any signs of crazy nurses as you approached the place. Nobody came running at you with a chainsaw at least. You didn’t even find evidence of squatters who could sometimes pose some danger.

After deciding it was safe enough, you lifted yourself through one of the windows and began to explore.

Honestly, it was creepy. Everything was way too old to be worth collecting and there were too many unidentifiable stains for your liking. The water damage was bad. It looked like the ceiling was there for aesthetics only and several rooms creaked too much for you to comfortably cross them.

And that was even without the awkward feeling of being watched.

You told yourself that it was just superstition but you couldn’t shake it. Every few seconds saw you looking over your shoulder in anticipation. It distracted you from keeping your eye on the path in front of you and the loud crack reached your ears too late.

The floor gave out and you fell through. Your shoulder hit some kind of metal object as you landed in the room below. Painful shocks ripped through your body and your head knocked against the floor with a heavy thud.

Stars danced in front of your vision and you raised your hand to the top of your head. Blood coated your hand when you lowered it to look.

Shit.

Shakily, you tried to pull yourself up but quickly found that your arm was too sore. Instead, you pulled your phone from your pocket and sent off the emergency text to your friend.

The world faded to black not long after that.

When you woke up next, you were in your room with a bandage wrapped around your head. You had felt like absolute crap but still gotten up to thank them for the save. They had nodded and warned you to be more careful, happy that you had been outside the hospital so they didn’t have to look for too long.

Before you could even think about how you had crawled there, they asked how you had managed to do your own stitches so nicely.

Puppeteer

Your camera was on 10% battery.

Grumbling, you shoved it into your bag and cursed your past self for forgetting to put it on charge. In order to get the best sunrise photos, you had found yourself waking up earlier and earlier. It was tiring but it was worth it… most of the time.

You just hoped that at least one of your pictures was usable but you could only check on them once you got home.

The streetlight above your head flickered as you walked past. It wasn’t unusual but when you were the only person awake for miles around, it was awfully creepy.

Putting your hands into your jacket pockets, you continued strolling back home. The neighborhood had never been dangerous and despite living in the area for your entire life, no incidents made you want to stop walking around at night.

Deciding that you wanted to take a precautionary shot, you headed for your neighbour’s house first. They had an arch covered in jasmine flowers that made for some perfectly safe photos and they never minded your presence.

After making your way there and getting a few photos, you were treated to the fright of your life when their began howling and barking. It wasn’t aimed at you but you didn’t like the noise regardless.

As you rounded the corner of the house, planning on racing back to your own home, you encountered the dog’s target.

A man – cloaked in the darkness and barely illuminated by the streetlight – opening one of the windows with ease. Irritated by the dog, he didn’t notice you until your finger twitched around the shutter of your camera. There was a flash.

His head snapped up and you screamed.

The man’s complexation was literally grey. He wasn’t just ill, he was the colour of storm clouds. Golden eyes with no pupils glared at you and froze you in place. Whatever he was, this man was the furthest thing from human.

Your scream woke your neighbors. The sound of movement began coming from inside the house.

He abandoned the window, stalking towards you. The air tingled like it was expecting a lightning storm. Golden tendrils grew from his fingertips and shot towards you. They had you pinned in an instant.

You struggled against them and opened your mouth to scream again but they wrapped around your head, forcing your jaw shut.

This was how you died… tears spilled down your cheeks at the realization. You were going to be an unsolved murder. All you hoped was you got a good picture of him.

Your neighbor’s front door opened and great dane let out an ear-splitting bark as he raced toward you.

The man, or creature, or monster, or whatever he was, released you to face the dog. He let it approach before vanishing into a cloud of smoke as its jaws reached him.

“What was that?” the timid voice brought you back into reality.

“It was trying to get into your house,” you said. “I screamed when I saw it and then it grabbed me.” Your voice changed to a whimper as reality hit you. You nearly died.

The small child of the house came over to hug your leg. “I’m sure Puppet didn’t mean to scare you,” she said. “He always comes to visit but he doesn’t like it when people make noise. You shouldn’t scream when you see him again.”

You made eye-contact with the parents and they wore expressions of horror at their daughter’s words.

“Puppet?” you asked in a small voice.

She nodded rapidly. “He says he stops by because he likes watching people. I think that he’s watching us all right now! But he can hide in the shadows too well.”

“I’m going to go and call the police,” somebody said.

You weren’t all too focused. The feeling of being watched grew heavier and you clutched tightly at the camera in your hands.

Slenderman

You couldn’t tell if they were being serious. You hoped that they were joking. They weren’t genuinely going to…

“No,” you stated.

The two younger children both turned to look at you simultaneously. Guilt flashed across their faces as though they weren’t aware you were listening. It was as though you were asked to babysit them because you didn’t pay attention. These two should have realised that by now.

“Do you think all the stories are true?” the boy asked. “I think that they are. One of my friends said she saw a huge dog in the forest and then it ran away after eating a whole cow!”

“No way!” his twin sister shouted. “Dogs don’t eat cows, so it can’t be true!”

You put on your best intimidating expression and crossed your arms. “I don’t care if they’re true or not. There is absolutely no chance that either of you are going to go running off into the woods with bears, wolves and all kinds of other creatures.”

The two children glanced at each other and bolted for the tree line before you could grab their shirts.

Thankfully your legs were longer even if they had a head start and you managed to catch up pretty quickly. Once you caught the boy and picked him up with ease, the girl dashed behind a tree.

“Can we please just leave?” you asked nicely. “If we forget about the forest adventure thing, I promise I won’t tell your parents and I’ll get you ice cream.”

The boy was trying his hardest to get out of your hold. You were starting to think babysitting didn’t pay enough.

“I don’t want ice cream,” the girl said. “I want to go and find a unicorn.”

She darted off into the forest and you let out a deep groan. Shifting the boy’s weight over your one hip, you started walking after her. If you wanted to give chase via running, you would have to put the kid down and trust him to follow or stay.

It was obvious that wasn’t happening.

It didn’t take you too long to find the girl. Mostly because she had stopped in the middle of a weird grove in the trees. She was just staring off into the dark shadows beyond it.

As you approached her, static popped in your ears. You shook your head in an effort to displace it but the closer you got, the louder it became.

The child in your arms whimpered, clutching his head.

You softly called her name and then it appeared. It was a man-like monster, standing just in the shadows of the trees. Easily over 7ft tall and insanely thin with no facial features. Your heart jumped into your throat and your stomach tied itself into a knot.

Without taking your eyes off it, you reached out a hand and fumbled around until you grabbed the girl’s shirt.

The static was getting louder and louder. You tried to shut it out as you started moving backwards, tugging the child along after you. She wasn’t willing to move her legs. She was entranced but whether by fear or magic, you couldn’t tell.

And then it was much closer.

You stumbled in fright, letting go of the girl’s shirt and landing on your ass. The boy fell on top of you but scrambled away and hide in the bushes within the blink of an eye. You sent a silent prayer to him to run back home to the other adults.

Once again, the creature was stationary but now the static was growing to such a volume that you could imagine your ears were starting to bleed.

You reached out for the girl again slowly, but something wrapped around your leg and yanked you into the air.

It took almost a full second for you to realise that the screaming ringing in your ears was you. Whatever was holding you tightened and whipped your body through the air. It was like your leg was being ripped away.

Then you were falling.

It was some feat of luck that you managed to twist your body, so you didn’t land on your head. You lay there for a while before something poking your back made you unbury your face.

The twins were staring at you with wide eyes and the monster was nowhere in sight.

“What was –“ you couldn’t finish.

“Slenderman,” they said in perfect sync.

Splendorman

Another stop…

You couldn’t help yourself. Every time you walked past one of the posters fluttering lightly in the wind you had to stop and stare at it.

A few days ago, your dog, your beautiful and sweet puppy, had disappeared from your house without a trace. The missing posters were depressing reminders that he wasn’t home. It hadn’t taken long for your mind to spiral into the negative thoughts about how close the road was.

Damn your coworkers. One of the had suggested the road in the first place and while they hadn’t intended anything malicious, it was definitely not helping your fears.

The dog had been with you through thick and through thin… if it was dead, you may as well have lost a close family member.

Hanging your head, you dragged your eyes away from the poster and kept walking.

People bumped into you, but it was your fault. You refused to look up in case another poster distracted you. Getting home before the sun set was your only focus now.

You had tried going out and searching in all the places where your dog once spent time to no avail. Always willing to try again, you chose to drop off your bags and head out later that evening when you ran out of distractions.

As you walked through the gates in front of your house, a gust of air gently messed up your hair. A gust of wind suspiciously similar to a laugh.

Your logical mind told you it came from the street, but something made you stop in your tracks.

The walls around your property towered. There’s no possibility that somebody could be in your garden. To try and scale one of the walls, they would have been in full view of your neighbours who would have undoubtedly called the cops.

“You’re sad,” the wind whispered before you could brush off your suspicion.

Spinning wildly, you searched around for the source. You backed up until your entrance gate was behind you. You could run down to the main street with ease if you could just get your fumbling fingers to unlock things.

“Don’t run,” the wind said, this time blowing from a separate direction. “I promise I’m not going to hurt you. I just wanted to know why you’re upset.”

Is this what going insane was? Nobody around and the wind was talking to you. You had always feared losing your mind and now it was happening.

“I’m real,” the wind said. “I’m hiding because I’ll scare you if you see me.”

“I’m going mad,” you muttered, shaking your head. “If this is somebody pulling a prank on me I swear….”

The wind quietened for a bit and then it picked up again, ruffling your hair as it spoke. “If I show myself, it’ll prove that you’re not going crazy, but I don’t want to make it worse by frightening you… you’re so sad already.”

“I lost my best friend and people have been telling me he’s most likely dead,” you hissed. “Obviously I’m not in the best mood. Now I’m losing my fucking mind and talking to air.”

The atmosphere around you dropped, like it does moments before lightning strikes. You glanced at the sky in confusion. As expected, no clouds in sight.

You lowered your gaze and a 7ft tall creature covered in bright polka dots stood in front of your house.

Once you screamed, it disappeared.

“I’m sorry,” the wind said. “I knew I would scare you, but I had hoped it would show you that I’m not imaginary. I’m just trying to help.”

The gate finally opened behind you and you stumbled backwards through it, your heart sitting in your throat. A monster was in your house and it was probably going to kill you. Spinning on your heel, you took off full speed back towards the main street.

You were fully expecting it to give chase now that you hadn’t fallen for its claims of harmlessness but it didn’t.

Instead you reached the main road and only got a few strange looks because of how much you were shaking. Nothing followed you.

The wind picked up once more. “I’ll try and help,” it promised.

People walking around you should have heard it as well but none of them so much as blinked.

Ticci Toby

While you had been told that a noise limit for the forest existed, your laughter refused to cooperate. It rang through the trees and probably chased off all the animals nearby. A picnic out in a national forest was a fantastic way to reconcile with nature and to scare it all away.

With eleven people in your picnic party, chances of any creatures coming into view were already slim though so you didn’t worry too much.

“We didn’t bring nearly enough fruit,” you muttered as you dug in the basket.

“Excuse you, I brought a whole watermelon but you ate it,” somebody answered your grumble. “If you want fruit, it is spring. Go and forage for some berries.”

You snorted. “Yeah, right. I’m going to go out by myself in the middle of the one season where bears are irritable as fuck. I know I sometimes act a little impulsively, but I don’t exactly have a wish to die at the claws of a grumpy teddy.”

Your friend leaned towards you. “Is that so? What if we split into teams and made a bet? Loser has to take a dip in the river.”

“A bet?” you asked. “I’m interested.”

She grinned and snapped her fingers. “Okay, there are eleven people so I’m feeling groups of two with one impartial party as a judge. We should be fine if we make enough noise and stick within close vicinity to each other. See how many berries we can gather?”

Tipping out the picnic basket’s contents, you smirked and pushed it into her chest. “Oh, I hope you brought a swimming costume.”

Everybody teamed up with ease and grabbed one of the many containers lying on the blanket. You headed out with your partner and gave a wink to the other teams. All you needed was to find one good bush first and you had it won.

“We should split up,” your partner said. “Cover more ground.”

You nodded. “We meet up back here once we’ve found a good bush,” you agreed. “And we shout if we find any animals.”

Obviously, your plans hadn’t involved losing your footing almost directly after the two of you split.

Tumbling down the small hill, you tried your hardest to protect yourself from the bushes as you went through them. At some point, you lost your basket and by the time you had finally rolled to a stop, you had no idea where it was.

Grumbling, you stood up and started searching until something dark caught your eye. Thinking it was your basket, you made your way over.

The clearing you walked into housed a scene you could never have imagined.

A dead bear lay slumped against a tree, its fur being what had caught your eye earlier. A hatchet buried in its neck was spilling blood onto the floor around it. All that hardly compared to the man leaning against a tree.

“Oh my god!” you exclaimed. “Are you alright?”

His head immediately snapped up, allowing you to see that he was wearing a mouth guard and a pair of goggles. Blood seeped from between his fingers where they clutched against his chest, but he hardly noticed. A hatchet was hanging from his belt.

Suddenly, you were wishing you had kept your mouth shut.

He stared at you blankly for a while, an occasional twitch minorly affecting his body. Reaching up, he took off his mouthguard. “I can’t feel any pain,” he said. “So, I’m fine. Why are y-you out here? The hiking trail is far.” He struggled with one of the words, seeming to hiccup a little on it.

“I was searching for berries and I slipped down a hill,” you answered. “Are you sure you’re okay? It looks like you got into a fight with a bear. Your shirt is all bloody.”

“I did fight a bear,” he laughed, gesturing to it. “I won.”

Your eyes grew wider. “I think you should get to a hospital. What’s your name? I can call somebody for you and we’ll get you medical attention.”

“Toby,” he said. “That’s my name. What’s yours?”

You gave him your full name and pulled out your phone. “My friends are close by,” you said. “Don’t worry, they’ll be here to help soon.”

When you raised your attention from your phone, he had disappeared and so had the hatchet from the bear’s neck.

Trenderman

Work was hard. It made your feet ache, it made your back click and crack, and it felt like the problems would never end.

Would you give up working in the fashion industry? Not a chance.

Your boss walked past where you were calming down an irate customer over the phone and dropped the keys to the front of the building in front of you. “Close up for me,” she mouthed as she left.

Nodding, you moved them to the side of the desk where they couldn’t be lost.

Once you had finished calming the customer, you glanced around to check how many people were left in the room. Three still working and one in the process of leaving. You were technically going into overtime at this point, but you didn’t mind.

There was a reason you were promoted so quickly.

“We need to set up cameras!” one of the floor managers snapped, storming into the office. She marched straight over to your desk and glowered at you. “I put this request in a week ago.”

Scrolling through the documents, you quickly opened the file. “I see but it looks like it’s been bumped due to a shipment malfunction, I’ll flag it. What’s the problem?”

“Customers or members of staff are moving items around and throwing things out without warning. We need to catch the culprits!” she snapped.

“What has been thrown out?” you asked. “I’ll add it into the information.”

The woman started listing quicker than you could type. “I’ve found crocs, toeless thigh-high boots, bellbottomed jeans, coloured faux fur jackets, luminous lipstick, w-necks, and jeggings all in vast numbers in the trash can. Every time I put them out on shelves, they disappear again.”

It took everything in you not to snort. “I’ll mark this vital.”

She stalked off and you went back to inputting the shipping requirements. You were meant to be organising what was coming in for the latest line and subtly omitting anything that wouldn’t sell well enough.

Slowly but surely, your co-workers trickled out of the office after finishing off their daily tasks. You kept going, trying to make sure you could have a longer break the next day.

Finally, when the sun had already set, you relented and started getting ready to go home.

You sung as you finished packing up for the day. Being the last one in the building (thus having to lock up) made you a little more confident as you danced around getting everything together. You slung your bag over your shoulder and happily trotted over to the door.

It made you so happy that your boss entrusted you to be the last one around. She was so hyper-protective of company secrets that you were proud of yourself for winning her over.

Your talent with people was something you attributed to dealing with painful customers.

As you passed through the store-part of the business you stopped to rearrange a mannequin. Every morning when you came in, you always noticed something had been changed with this specific one. You figured you could move something small and see if it would be a good place to set up a hidden camera.

Though you weren’t expecting it to suddenly grab your arm.

“You may be one of the few workers here with good taste, but I advise you don’t try and change my outfit,” it said. It didn’t have a mouth, but the words rang in your head, nevertheless.

You screamed and pulled away, tearing your arm from its grip. Shelves were knocked over and clothing was sent flying as you tried to escape.

The mannequin just watched you as you fumbled madly for the door.

The glass rattled in the frame from how hard you slammed it shut behind you. You sped off down the street, moving faster than you ever had before. You collapsed on your lawn by the time you reached the house, taking deep breaths.

Nothing had followed you. Everything was okay.

With shaking fingers, you dialed your boss’ number and told her you would be taking a sick day. There wasn’t a chance in hell you were going anywhere near there again.

Not to mention the mess you made… you were definitely getting fired.

#creepypasta #creepypasta x reader #slenderman #splendorman #trenderman #ticci toby #nurse ann #masky #cp masky #marble hornets #lost silver #puppeteer #x reader

[a-froger-epic]

Interview with a Queen “groupie”

Cross-posted to AO3. I encourage you to leave any comments you have there.

---

I compiled this interview following a long email exchange with J, a very sweet lady who went to Ealing Art School between 1972 and 1974. She knew all four members of Queen personally and was part of their larger circle of friends.

First off, you may find this hard to believe. I don’t blame you. But I assure you I’m not pulling your leg. As well as the pictures I share in this post, I have seen current pictures of J (which I will not share to protect her privacy). There is no indication as far as I am aware that she isn’t who she says she is.

Nastally, hold up. How exactly did you find this lady?

She found me. It turns out that she has been following my story Dawn of Aquarius for quite some time. The story is set in 1969. A lot of research about the era went into it, because I wanted to portray that time period - and Freddie’s and Roger’s surroundings - as accurately and realistically as I possibly could. That was what drew J in. She tells me it brought back a lot of memories for her. One of the reasons I love DoA so much is the nostalgia, she says, which genuinely means the world to me. Eventually, she talked to me in the comment section. Of course, I freaked out!

And then, I asked her for an interview, to which she replied: I will give it a go, but you must remember that I am 65 and there were great drugs in the 70s, and at 16, away from home, I had a lot!

And so...

Here’s what is IMPORTANT TO KEEP IN MIND when you read this interview.

These are one woman’s 50-year-old memories and subjective impressions. J has been incredibly kind to let me pick her brain, trying to recall everything as best as she can. In her own words:

Just remember that when I answer the questions, it is from a 16-year-old who is 9 years younger than Freddie and a little girl with no family and friends in a strange country trying to fit in. The only reason I was there, was because some hippie thought I had a unique art style.

---

J as a teenager.

[I have edited the interview together from our long, and somewhat messy at times, email exchange. Typos have been fixed and some punctuation added for clarity, but I have not changed anything J has written to me. Again, bear in mind these are personal opinions and impressions.]

So, J, how did you end up at Ealing Art School in 1972 and what was it like?

This was the painting done for the Australian school-leaving certificate.

It placed first and gave me a scholarship. I could pick France, the USA or England. As a dual citizen of the UK, the choice was easy. The scholarship paid for board and fees, so had to be and sell whatever for spending money.

This picture is from the dorm. We all had a 10pm curfew and a very thick rule book that, I am proud to say, I broke every one of them, one by one. The rooms were on the 1st and 2nd floor. We were on the first floor, rooms one side and admin staff the other end. We had two bathrooms for 18 girls. One of them had two baths. The walls were your standard half wall, so it was a given that if you had a bath you run the risk of having a bucket of cold water dropped on you. Downstairs was the kitchen and lounge room.

I want to ask you a few things about life in London in the early 70s, to get a picture of what it was really like. For example, was there alcohol at the music gigs you went to?

If it was a school, church or community hall, no. If it was a pub, yes.

Did you and your friends drink as much then as young people tend to drink now when you all went out?

No, we didn't. I think it had a lot to do with money. We didn't have the disposable income, and it was unheard of to still be living at home with the parents after the age of 20.

Was weed and LSD as big and easily accessible as depictions of the 60s and 70s would have us believe?

The drugs! Got to have drugs. Pot (weed) was easy to grow, very cheap. Used to smoke it in bongs rather than joints, more bang for your buck. Trips [LSD] were cheap, I think. About 2 pounds and you were on the high for over 24 hours with no sleep. My drug of choice was hash. Either the oil or the block. It was a nice high, but you could not function well. But if you listen to the music of the time it really does reflect what it was like, to have a group of friends over for a session. Having said all that the most outlandish and shocking drug I ever saw anyone use was the birth control pill. Didn't you have to hide that stuff away?!

Can you tell us some 70s slang that isn’t really in use anymore? What in the world does “ultra-blagging” mean? (As written in a letter penned by Freddie to his friend Celine in 1969.)

Abso-bloody-lootely!

Man, I thought I was the bees knees to be on a scholarship in London. But that didn't stop me from jigging or having a skive day. They were the days that I blagged my way into a pub, had too many lagers and ended up chundering in the gutter. That was how you knew your night was ace. I would get a right bollocking if anyone found out. It would be a bugger when all that you could find at a car boot sale was chavtastic, but sometimes you could be Jammy Dodger and tickety-boo you find something brilliant. Bob's your uncle. Anyways, I need to see a man about a dog.

[It seems to me that J uses a bit of Australian slang here, like chundering, which makes sense because she is, after all, Australian. She also provided the translation:]

Cheers

J

It would be my honour.

I felt very privileged to be given a scholarship that let me study in England. But being so young and having no family to guide me, it was often tempting to not turn up or give a false excuse for being sick. (I had a lot of food poisoning). These would often happen if the night before I had been drinking beer and ended up vomiting outside the pub. But in my young mind that was a good night. If any of the teachers found me drinking I would be in a lot of trouble. Often I would have to say I was holding it for someone else. Not having much clothes with me, I would buy them second hand from church jumble sales or other students and, yes, Kensington market (the market). Some of the stuff would not be very tasteful or in good condition. But sometimes you would find something that was cheap and in good condition. I will stop this text now as I must go to the toilet.

PS: Ultrablagging sounds very Freddie. Blagging was used, but not ultra, meaning to persuade someone to do something or act better than you are. They were always rock stars.

Sincerely

J

[It was at this point that I realised I was talking to an absolute legend. She also told me then that the majority of her old photographs had sadly been lost when her house was flooded in 1988, including most of the photographs from her stay in London. Noooo! :(]

When you went out to dance, did you have only live music? Were there DJs yet?

You know, that is hard. We did not have a DJ. Sometimes there would be a band. Often we looked for places with a band or the jukebox. I think pubs closed at 10pm and some stayed open to 12 or 1, but public transport stopped at 9. So if you had not arranged a lift then you had to make the last bus. Most of the time we would be heading back to someone's place to get stoned and then crash there. In the morning you would have to work out where you were. When I got back to Australia, the discos were all the rage. They could have been in London too but it was not cool to like disco.

How many people would show up to Queen’s gigs when they played in pubs or at, for example, the Imperial College?

Depending on the location and the night: 10 to 1000!

So how did you first meet the Queen boys?

I was at the pub talking about a band we saw last week when Brian stuck his head into our booth telling us he knew a better one. Thinking about seeing them at the stall... Roger not often, Freddie quite a lot. Often on different stalls, I think that is why I can't remember the name. [The name of the stall. Other sources confirm that Freddie also worked at Alan Muir’s stall, for example, selling shoes.]

How well did you know them?

Just looking at your tumblr account. [she has had a look at my blog, where somebody asked if ‘groupie’ meant she had slept with the band] No, I never slept with the boys. I would not say I was a close friend, but I started at Ealing Art College in ‘72 and moved in the same circles. I loved the music and could be called one of the first groupies. I had to sneak into the pubs because I was 16. Roger always teased me for being so young. They all did seem to be one very large family, not just the band. It was a group of about twenty regulars, both male and female. Everyone knew that Fred was too gay to function. We were all at the gay rights march in London in 1972, had to run after the march. Lots of sharpies [Australian slang: youth gang, thugs] wanting to bash us. Back then I was in every protest that was going, student union rights, even the secretary protest. Just part of the times, stick it to Man or Woman. I left London in ‘74 for Australia, been here ever since and lost track of the boys but have never stopped being a fan.

What do you remember about them? How would you describe their personalities?

Don’t let the trolls hate me, but I did not like Brian. I found him to be rather full of himself. Space was a subject you never brought up around Brian or you would die of old age before he stopped talking. He was always the first to speak and start a conversation and then quickly passed you off to John, who was always tired and shy. Roger was also quite shy at times. He was very self-conscious of his looks, as he felt being pretty, nobody would take him seriously. Fred, well, he was not yet the big star, so I think he was working on his stage persona. When talking to groups at parties, he had the best stories of things that had happened to him or close friends. They were very funny and very descriptive. He was the life of the party. When he had a few to drink or was the centre of attention, he would take a cigarette out of the closest person’s hand and start smoking. Now remember this is the point of view of a 16-year-old girl that was a fish out of water, trying to fit in and not having much worldly experience.

It is said that Freddie and Roger were very stylish. How did they dress in everyday life?

Fred would do his hair and makeup to check the mail. Yes, he was always turned out, but so were a lot of people. Freddie did go over the top with hats, scarfs and jewellery. With Roger, it is a surprise he was able to have kids his jeans were that tight. And his shirts were always open unless he was in a jumper. I think it could have been so that you knew he was male, as it was the start of the unisex clothing. When I travelled out of London I realised it was a London thing. When I got back to Australia everyone thought I was a show-off.

There are some disagreements about how tall especially Freddie was. I know this is a difficult thing to try and remember accurately. But do you remember?

Freddie was taller than me but everyone was. Roger was shorter than Fred, but I never saw Roger in platform shoes. I did meet up with the band by chance at Sydney airport in 1984, said ‘hello’ but they did not remember me, or if they did then they did not say anything and I did not want to be a dork. At that time Fred was the same height as me (5ft 8in/1.72m), Roger was taller than me. It made me think at the time that he had a growth spurt! John was shorter than me and Brian has always been tall. [I have a feeling the platform shoes - or lack thereof - played a vital role here! Although 172cm for Freddie seems likely.]

You said everyone knew Freddie was “too gay to function”. Attitudes towards homosexuality have changed so much that it can be hard for us, now, to fathom what exactly people must have thought of him. Was it more of a joke that he was so camp? Was it something he would have been teased for? Also, he had a girlfriend. Did you ever meet Mary or the other girlfriends?

In 1972 a whole group of us - and I am pretty sure that Fred, Roger, Brian and Tim were there - were in a gay pride march. [Since then, J has found and showed me a picture of a boy she thought was Tim Staffel, and it wasn't, so Tim was most definitely not there. Whether Freddie, Roger and Brian really were there or if J is misremembering, who knows?] Us youth believed you could not choose who you fell in love with and if it was same sex, so what? However, if it was two girls then it was every guy’s duty to change her!

It was also a time that the gayer the guy was, the more the girls were interested. Also, if a guy was gay then you did not have to worry about him and he was a good person to take with you if you were going out drinking. However, the police, parents, teachers and anyone of authority were horrified and treated them badly. I did meet Mary a couple of times at pubs and once after a gig. This is just my opinion, but I found her a bitch. It could be that I was so young. It could be that I was very Australian. It could be that she felt threatened as my accent was a magnet to people around. And the boys (Queen) were no exception. Brian had a cousin in OZ and was always asking questions. I remember that my close group of friends thought that Mary made the perfect girlfriend for Fred as they were as fake as each other. Having said that about them, I often wonder if I would think the same now and if my perceptions were just because she would not give me the time of Day. Chrissy and Jo were a lot of fun.

This was before your time, but I read that Freddie's nickname at Ealing Art School was ‘Freddie Baby’. Any ideas how this came about? His showmanship or maybe personality traits?

I don't think so. There were an older crowd that would talk like that. I think the slang ‘baby’ was a 60’s thing, like groovy baby.

How long, roughly, did Roger and Freddie have their stall? I can't find anywhere when it closed down. What did it actually look like? Was it a sort of wooden stall type of thing? Or an actual room? What were some of the other things people sold at Kensington Market? Mostly clothes or all sorts?

The markets were little divided shops. The back was brick and the walls wood. I have been trying all day to remember the name. [Of the stall.] I think it was something hard to say. More often than not it would be Freddie's dad in the store. It was still open when I left. Roger and Freddie were both in the store on Saturdays and some Sundays. There was a girl, I think Jill, who was in the store more. And during the week it could be anyone. You name it and you could get it at the markets. Second hand or designer clothes, shoes, jewellery, pot and assortments. Hair cuts, food, bric-a-brac.

Wait, wait. What? Freddie’s dad? Really now?

Yeah, it was an older Indian man. so we just assumed it was his father. It was my understanding that he started the stall then the boys would work it as the whole markets were set up for younger people, but if needed he would work there. I don't think the boys would be able to pay the rent on their own. [I have since found out that the stall closed in late 1971, and Freddie continued to work at the Market until '74, for Alan Mair and possibly others. So the stall J witnessed wasn't their original stall - explaining all the different people she saw there - but she had no way of knowing that it wasn't.] They always had incense burning that was very big in the 70s. I still occasionally bring out the sticks, but it does not last like the candles and diffusers of today. If you could get in touch with Robert Daniels, he ran ChaChaDumDum it was the stall across from Freddie. He would know the dates.

[J says it’s this look, in a picture she happened across while looking at my tumblr] Yep, that is the one. It usually means that he does not believe or agree with something that was said and is working out how to respond, or he has lost the plot.

You mentioned Roger seemed shy to you at times. Was he also quite charming? We read a lot about what a chick magnet he was. Was this the impression you had?

My favorite subject! I had a thing for Roger. Everyone has a type and mine is the blue-eyed blond. Now, before you ask, was he brunet? No, he was a mouse/dirty blond. If it was summer he would have blond streaks mostly at the ends. He knew he was pretty and was always dressed in the latest fashion and had the current hairstyle. So, being my type I was constantly watching him. Everyone slept around during that time. I did not notice Roger doing it more or less. 80% of the time he was with Jo. Yes, he was a chick magnet, but he did not do the chasing. He was always very polite to everyone. If it ever looked like there would be any conflict he would be the first to leave it. It was not that he was a coward, just not into conflict. If he saw anyone that needed help he was right there, and often had to have Freddie's back. I never saw him in a fight. He could always talk his way out of things. He was also very patient and would listen for hours to other people talk. However, he would get this vacant look in his eyes at times.

And Freddie would either click his fingers, change the subject or just give up. I don’t think that Brian noticed, and it would be fair game for John, he would see how far he could push it. Roger liked to drink a fair bit and when drunk he would be hanging all over Jo. If she was not there then he missed Jo. If, however, he thought that he or his friends were not being respected, then look out! It was a verbal volcano heading your way. That is what happened to me one time. I was trying to talk with my friends close to where a drunken Roger was and I yelled at him to shut the hell up, you wannabe blond. We/I coped a mouthful back, all in the same sentence, that finished with: Sorry, I didn't realise you were on your rags (period)! I have to have the last word, so I told him the truth: I don’t get them yet! (I was a late starter.) He went so red in the face and called me JB [jail bait] from then.

You also mentioned Roger’s cat Ziggy having kittens. I read about this but never when exactly it was. Do you remember?

I think it was winter ‘73. I remember being cold when he was asking around the pub. [To find homes for the kittens, I gather.]

Is it quite strange reading fictional interpretations of real people you knew? When did you first find out there was Queen fanfic?

No, we used to make up stories about people all the time, a verbal fanfic. Was looking up Adam Lambert and came across the fanfics. Some had me in stitches! Others, like DoA, had me hooked.

Please, allow me to be a little self-indulgent at the end. What's one thing I got totally RIGHT in DoA?

All the Ibex stuff.

What's one thing I got totally WRONG in DoA?

Roger did not have a temper, and I don’t know what the go with his father was, but he would talk about him quite a bit and was always visiting his mum. [Absolutely fair, not only did I change the timeline of Roger’s parents divorce in DoA - for lack of information at the time - but also created a completely fictional narrative around it for the sake of storytelling.]

J, thank you so much for all this, sincerely. Can you tell me a little more about yourself? Are you still an artist?

I don't paint or draw any more. At the age of a 50 the doctors operated on an aneurysm or three, and now my eyesight is very bad, I have no fine motor skills and a tremor. I was married in January 1984 and have just celebrated our 37 year anniversary. I have one daughter who is 30 and two great, although tiring grandkids. A girl, 11, and one boy, 5. I have lived my life as the average middle class Australian with great memories. Talking with you has helped me a lot to remember a time when the world was mine for the taking. When I returned to OZ I started nursing, met my best friend, and we planned that once we graduated we would go back to London to study midwifery. But I fell in love instead.

J's wedding in 1984. As you can see, she found her own blue-eyed blond.

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Upon request, J has shared some of her past and present artwork with me.

These are from her time at Ealing Art School:

These were done later, back in Australia:

J: Did this just before Christmas as you had inspired me. It did not require fine motor skills!

So there you have it! I hope you found this little glimpse through a 16-year-old girl’s eyes as much of a fascinating read as I did. I urge everybody one more time to remember that J did not have to share any of this, and I think we all owe her a big thank you for delving into her memories. She is likely to see the responses on AO3, so I have comment moderation enabled there as I will not let anybody harass this lovely lady. The tumblr she created is @since72, but she isn’t really an active user and also very new to it all. Again, I can only urge everybody to be respectful.

If you have other burning question for J, feel free to leave them in the comments on AO3. I will either pass them on, or she may want to reply to them herself directly.

#Queen band #Freddie Mercury #Roger Taylor #John Deacon #Brian May #interview #i am so excited about this #so much into #information #JB