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#im feeling VERY EMOTIONAL all of a sudden i am GOING 2 cry........
Hello! Enneagram 7 here. I find myself trying to like my job that can be very tough and stressful on some days just because it’s very detail oriented and if you do not have all the information that is needed to pay for an invoice then you cannot pay for it or sometimes you can but you would have to look through each invoice to find the correct one and we go as far as even creating admin fees in the system and new tolls that aren’t registered in the system and it could be as much as 50 tolls you have to individually create. I’m in this job mainly because it pays well and I learn new skills that I can get hired for by other companies. It took me atleast 1 week to understand the system SQL and what I had to do working on different lists and websites. I was stuck on ENTP & ENFP for the longest. I thought because I wanted autonomy and freedom I might be an ENFP? I remember my father telling me I couldn’t go to my own graduation because of covid and I use to cry and argue with him telling him “im going and you’re not stopping me because I’ve been waiting the longest for this” the day came and I changed my mind and stayed home. Before my brother moved out, me and him use to watch anime all the time and talk about things and go outside. I was fine when he left, but then all of a sudden I started feeling lonely. I realized I don’t even watch anime anymore ever since he left and I use to always watch it regardless. I was suppose to hang out with my friends and I couldn’t because my father was home and had me doing things. I didn’t even want to answer the phone or wanted to talk to them because of the thought of them being disappointed. Sometimes I’ll even try so hard to learn things quickly or atleast work faster so my manager would be impressed by me. I’m scared of him being disappointed in me and I really crave affirmation. There was this time I got emotional out of no where with my guy best friend because I lied to him and I told him the reason why I did it was because I missed him so much I never get to see him. It’s not hard for me to articulate my emotions it’s just hard to know what exactly am I experiencing because as soon as I feel uncomfortable I find something to distract myself so I don’t feel it anymore. I started excessively thinking about my fwb too much after hanging out because I would get super anxious and think of ways to attract him so he can flatter me. If I don’t get it from him I get upset and try to find it from other people. It was so bad I couldn’t even do my homework or think straight because I was afraid someone else was getting his attention and he was going to get bored of me. I don’t know if I ended up liking him or it was the attention I craved but I feel much better after ghosting him. Another incident happened where my bestfriend has been so busy we haven’t talked in a week and I told my other friend don’t even worry about answering her or speaking to her because she’s probably bored and we need to move on and focus on other things. I started ignoring her and not wanting to pick up the phone and tried to get her to forget about me especially after I thought she called my other friend first, I didn’t think I was important anymore. So my friend thought I was upset or whatever but I didn’t feel anything in the moment. And l was so confused on why he thought I was upset if I felt nothing. What are your thoughts on my type?
MBTI type: purely on writing style and basic content (nearly all interpersonal relationship details), ENFP; since this is one of the the things you were considering already, I think it's likely.
Enneatype: you're not a 7. You're a 2 or a 3. This is all about how others perceive you and how you want to be validated and loved by them. I think the 7 perception probably comes from the Ne, and you could have a 7 fix, but you're a 2 or 3 core.
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kirbysmasher48 · 2 years
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Lonliness
TW // Suicide mention (wow im actually using TW without irony... who thought that would happen lmao)
You know, over the past 5 or so months, I Had absolutely struggled the hardest I ever have in life; for the first two months, I suffered in silence, and not a single person knew what was going on. Some people had noticed but never really asked if I was doing okay; of course, I would have said "I'm doing fine" anyways, but I really have to thank my friend goob for listing to me when I had a mental breakdown, it was really sudden from his point of view because before this point I was a very jolly and silly guy. However, what had occurred was I had not slept for about 3 to 4 days at this point out of stress and other mental things, I had not been at school for about a month at this point, and he had known, but not as to why. he asks, "why aren't you at school, little guy" (of course in a jokey way, not intended to insult or upset me), but I had just kind of lost it and broke down crying and screaming... now I'm not much of an open guy, so this really shocked him. But instead of just ignoring it and going on, he stayed and listened to me. After about 2 hours of crying out and just saying EVERYTHING that had been going on in my mind, he stayed with me and calmed me down. Let me tell him about all the trauma I had experienced, all the stress I was taken from school, etc., etc. I had even told him about my plans to kill myself; I had genuinely planned on doing it. But thankfully, he was there to talk me out of it. If it was not for him, I would not likely be here right now. He's been with me, helping me sense than in a way no one ever has before; it really really was nice to have a good friend talk to you while you lose it... about 2 months ago, my school finally let me get what I needed after 9 months of begging (it only got really really bad at the beginning of the year, up intill that point I could handle myself well enough) eventually I was able to catch up with the help of him, he would help calm me down when I have a panic attack and actually going fucking insane, I do not know how he was able to keep calm during that, it must have too have been really really scary that someones mental health was being supported by only one guy... eventually as the tides had lowered and things started to calm down. I was able to get from straight F's in every single class to B's in all of them... I then graduated about a week ago or so... I look back and sometimes reflect on how it was. have you ever been in a state where you can't really process how bad something is due to its extremity? That's what it feels like. It's like I'm looking at a wall that just goes up and never ends, and somehow we were able to get over it. It scares me when I look back... but I have to say. I think it was overall a good thing; in its own weird demented way, it taught me that it's okay to be more open about your emotions... I used to have a habit where I would bottle it up. But I mean extremely, like a volcano that's been sealed by the earth, and it had caused me to get to such a bad mental place I had genuinely considered suicide, I have sense burned my note... I'm glad I don't remember what it said on it... but I will say now, I am very, very happy. I'm glad its over, and I coldent have done it wouth him... please anyone reading this, be open about your emotions no matter how negative they are, and if you belive you cant, try and find a professional... i admit it was not smart of me to rely to dump all of my stuff on him, I had told me after the whole ordeal that it had actually caused him quite a bit of stress, but I cannot thank him enough for supporting me not matter what.
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krustybob · 4 years
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hsgshsgmf thinking abt eripsii very very hard again........
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they make me so happy wtf i love them so so so much 🥺🥺🥺
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lilacveiledsea · 2 years
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Unsung Truths
Matsukawa x fem!reader
Genre- hurt/comfort (mostly hurt)
Warnings- Lots of Cursing, very emotional (?)
Word count- 1k+
A/N- this is kinda self-indulgent, the ending was kind of rushed, sorry bout that, let me know if I’ve forgotten any warnings
Tired, frustrated and under appreciated, that’s how you’d describe how you feel at the moment. It was towards the end of your afternoon shift when you got the text. “Good morning my darling, sorry I just woke up,” that’s all he had said. Why pray tell was he barley fucking waking up at 2:30 in the afternoon??? Sighing you just continued on with what little time was left until you clocked out. You texted Mattsun back once you got out about 40 mins later, “hey baby, just got out of work.”
Pocketing your phone, you started your walk back home. The frustration just started to boil over the longer you were left to your own silence. Walking into your shared home, Issei greeted you with a small smile from his spot on the couch. “Hey, how was work today?” He has asked as you toed off your shoes by the door. “Fine” Turing away from him, you continued your way to the bedroom and slammed the door shut. Mattsun jumped at the sudden noise. Hearing rushing footsteps approach the bedroom you turned just in time to see Issei throw the door open. “What the hell was that?!? Why do you come home, answer me all short then slam the fucking door? HUH!” That was the breaking point. “Dont you fucking dare yell at me like that Matsukawa!” He took a step back in shock as you were never really like this. He opened his mouth to retaliate but you shut him up real quick as you continued, “I don’t think you understand what im feeling right now…” He slowly made his way towards you, trying to pull you into a hug.
As soon as he tried to put his arm around you, you stepped backwards out of his reach. “NO! I don’t want that right now. Just let me speak.” Looking up at him he nodded his head in agreement. Sighing you carded your fingers through your now unruly hair. “Im tired of this… it seems like im the only one putting any effort into our future.” Issei had a confused look on his face but kept quiet to let you carry on, “ Im the only one working, do you know how it makes me feel, to be up and busting my ass at both work and school. To come home to you not having done anything, or to get a message from you once my class is over or my shift is almost over, or in the middle of a shift?? ” you both were on the verge of tears at your sudden confession. “Babygirl… no.” the brown haired male shifted in his spot. He wanted to go to you so bad, wanted to comfort you however he could, but he also wanted to respect your wishes of not being touched, so he stood frozen by the door. You couldnt stand anymore so you sat down on the edge of your bed. Issei, finally back to his senses, made his way to the bed and kneeled in front of you. “Babygirl, can you please look at me?” He said as he rub your arms. Pulling your head up, he gasped slightly. Without your knowledge, you had started crying.
Wiping the stray tears from your cheeks Mattsun had pulled you into a loving hug along with a sweet kiss to your forehead. “Im sorry, I didn’t know you were feeling this way… I didn’t know that my actions were taking such a toll on you away from home.” He took a breathe, “Im trying… I really am but I just feel like im in a hole and not doing anything right, there are so many things that I want to do but I feel like I won’t be able to do them.” Now it was his turn to cry. Through all the frustration that you were feeling, you never stopped to think about how Matsukawa was feeling. In the 5 years you guys had been together, it was hard not to feel the way you did, you just wanted everything to be perfect for the two of you and the future you wanted to build together. He was still kneeling infront of you, clinging to you as if he was going to lose you, in response you slid off the bed and onto the floor with him. Practically tackling him. “Whoa, Y/n, don’t do that without warning princess.” He muttered as he steadied the both of you, with you straddling him. Burying your head in the crook of his neck, you whispered, “Im sorry baby, im so so sorry. I didn’t think about how you were feeling and I’m sorry Sei.” Shushing you, he started rubbing soothing circles into your back with one hand while the other moved to your hair. “Its ok, shh, dont cry baby, its ok.” Kissing your temple. “We both need to work on better communication. How about we get off the floor and move to the bed ok? We both could use some cuddles.” He felt the smile tug on your lips since You were so close to his skin. You didn’t respond verbally but nodded against his shoulder.
Mattsuns grip on you tighter as he slowly started to get up from his sitting position.He slowly tried to put you down on the bed, but to no avail. “Y/N we can’t get into bed like this, come on, loosen your grip a little bit babygirl.” Doing as he said, you let go of him, he then placed you in the middle of the bed. He moved to his side of the bed and grabbed the tv remote. “Here pick something to watch,” he said handing you the remote,” ill go to the kitchen and get some snacks, im sure your hungry after working all day.” Smiling at him you took the remote.
“Sei, this isn’t going to fix everything, but I hope this is a start to us working on our communication.” Stopping in the threshold, he turned around and smiled at you, “Of course my love, ill start looking around tomorrow for things to do.”
You did your absolute best to believe him, things didn’t t get fixed right away but Mattsun did start looking around for a job just like he said he would. You both supported one another through this hard place you were both in. After some time he had found an accelerated course in Funeral services and Mortuary. Things were starting to turn around for the two of you and hopefully they will continue to prosper.
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reblogs, likes, and comments are greatly appreciated!
© lilacveiledsea 2022 : Please do not claim, modify, copy or repost/translate any of my work on this site or any other site
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avungerthatgotaway · 3 years
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The Soldier of the Night
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heyyyy guys!! this is my first ever request fic and im so excited to do iiiit. please tell me what you think of it in the comments🥰
it's made for this request
summary: y/n finally takes matters into her own hands and escapes hydra. but it won't be as easy as she tought...
warnings: mentions of blood and child neglect
pairings: avengers x teen!reader (platonic)
genre: angst-ish, fluff at the end
Sorry for grammar mistakes.
If you have request feel free to ask🥰
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Y/N Y/LN, but no one calls you by that name. To the world you are known as The Soldier of the Night, the merciless murderer. Mothers all over the world use you to teach their kids about most dreadful dangers. People gather around campfire in woods and share scary stories of your cold heart and homicides you don't feel guilty about. You are the biggest fear of each and every government there is in world.
And you always wonder what all those people would say if they knew how old you were. Or that you never kill willingly. Or that you silently pray every night for the victims you harmed or killed in your brainwashed state.
Or that hydra has no control over you anymore. You are currently running, without exact destination, just to get as far from hydra as you can. They are probably alerted of your absence by this point, but you are already in New York, so you can maybe find a hiding spot before they find you.
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-Avengers pov
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Nick Fury hurried to the avengers tower, where he called a sudden meeting this morning.
When he came in Steve and Sam were sweaty, probably just came from their morning jog. Bucky was still fighting sleep in his pyjamas, hair sticking out in different directions. Wanda was starring daggers at him for waking her up so early. Tony and Bruce were in lab coats, probably didn't sleep at all. All other avengers were at their respective missions.
"I called this meeting because my resources told me infamous Soldier of the Night is out of hydra HQ. We don't know why, but it's probably another killing mission for hydra. He is currently laying low, somewhere around south entrance to the city. Your mission is to stop him from harming anyone and bring him here. Alive if possible, it would benefit us to know what are hydra's plans at the moment." he finished.
"Alright." said Steve dutifully. "Any information we can get on him before we go?"
"Not much. Only that he is dangerous, and doesn't spare anyone. He is a ghost story. We don't even know if it's a he, that's just a guess."
"Very well. Everyone suit up, I expect you in front of tower in 10." Steve said and left, other avengers following behind.
-
They came back that evening, exhausted of their unsuccessful search. There was no trace of the soldier. But they had to keep looking as long as there's hope to get rid of the monster.
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-2nd person pov
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Your heart was racing a hundred miles. You were well aware of the possibility of hydra finding you. But you didn't expect it to be this soon. You were in hiding for only 2 months and they already tracked you down.
Windows broke on your left side and hydra agents started piling in. At the same time on your right side the door broke down revealing whole avengers team, with few additions. You faintly remember one of them as The Winter Soldier, but what was he doing with avengers? Your toughts were cut short by a punch in your face delivered by one of hydra agents.
That's when it snapped: you had to fight for your life. And you probably had to fight both sides.
You started fighting hydra agents, harming them as much as you can without killing.
The avengers stand at the doorstep, and you faintly hear one of them saying "What the actual fuck?". They seemed belivered.
But they soon join the fight knocking out hydra agents. A fist connected with the back of your head, knocking you out into pool of darkness.
-
Light clacking of bottles was the first thing you hear when you wake up. You squint your eyes open, panic finnaly kicking in to where you are. Your first tought was that you were back in hydra HQ, but the room was way too light for that, and hydra wanted you dead.
You started panicking and franatically got out of the bed, trying to escape. Whoever this is, they nean no good. Even avengers want to kill you. But as soon as you got up, black dots invaded your vision, causing you to fall. But before you hit the groung a pair of arms caught you, leading you to sit back in bed.
"Hey, hey sweetie calm down. No one will harm you here. Don't make any sudden movements, your head is still not completely healed." a man told you.
You just layed back and watched him bandage your wrist.
"I am Bruce Banner, by the way. What is your name?" he asked kindly.
"Y/N Y/LN" you whispered, almost inaudibly but he heard it.
"Alright, Y/N. I think I bandaged all your bruises. Rest of the team is waiting out, do you maybe want to meet them?"
By 'team' he probably meant rest of the avengers. You saw a big 'A' painted on the wasll, so that had to be it, right? You immediately shook your head no, eyes widening in fear. You still weren't sure they won't harm you, and meeting them seemed overwhelming in your current state.
"It's okay, calm down. You can meet them later. I will stay with you a little. We could talk if you want?"
You just shrugged your shoulders, not particularly fond of talking with anyone, but not wanting to seem rude because he did help you.
"Okay. How old are you Y/N?" he asked slowly.
"(your age)" you quietly said.
"Dear lord, you really are just a kid. I'm so sorry for everything you've gone through."
You just zoned out, thinking about everything that happened, when something poped up in your mind.
"Mr. Banner?" you asked shyly.
"Call me Bruce kiddo. What is it?"
"I tought I saw The Winter Soldier at the door when you guys came to get me?"
"Oh yes. Bucky. He was also in hydra, as you probably know. He was brainwashed. I suppose you were too?"
"I was, every time I killed somebody. Sometimes I went to missions with other agents and they didn't brainwash me, but I never killed anyone when I was in my senses." You started thinking about your victims as teers pooled in your eyes.
"We supposed so. Do you want me to bring Bucky in a little? Maybe he can help you feel better, because he knows what you're going through."
You slowly nodded, not wanting to reject meeting avengers the second time.
"Alright, he'll be here in a minute." Bruce gave you a gentle smile and patted your shoulder.
A minute after he exited, in came Bucky. He looked better than when you saw him last, but you doubted he's seen you. You were sneaking out, tryna find some food, when you heard and saw agents torturing him. That's about only memory you have of him, along with stories you've heard from other people.
"Hello there doll. How are you? Bruce told me you remember me." he said gently, sitting at the edge of your bed.
"I-I am alright, i guess. Th-thanks. And yes, I do. A little. I was passing by door, when I saw them torturing y-yo-you." you started sobbing a little, the memory bringing back others. Memories of them torturing you. And you torturing other people in your brainwashed state.
"Hey don't cry. It's okay, shhh. Come here." he opened his arms, and you hesitantly scooted closer, not exactly sure what he wanted. He circled his arms around you, and you flinched, thinking he's gonna attack you. But he just gently kept his arms wrapped around you, soothingly rubbing you back. after some time you wraoed your arms around his middle, still not sure what's going on.
But it was a nice feeling. You never felt something like it before. You felt so safe, like nothing could harm you as long as you two stay like that. You wanted to know what was all this about.
"Wha-at are you do-oing?" you asked after you stopped sobbing, but still hiccuping a little.
"Oh, I'm hugging you. Are you uncomfortable? I will stop if you are. Sorry." he said starting to draw back.
"No!" you quickly said, clutching onto him like koala. You were afraid the sense of comfort will leave you as soon as he withdraws from you.
"Shhh, doll. I won't let go. Never. Nothing will ever harm you here kiddo. We will take care of you. You can live normal life, like all other kids. Maybe go to school after you adapt to your surroundings. Here is a kid Peter he is about your age. You can make friends your age. And of course we will be your friends. For as long as you want it."
"Wait, I can live here? I'm not a burden?"
"No, of course not. Don't ever think that, please."
"B-Bu-Bru" you struggled to remember what Bruce told you his name was.
"Bucky. Or James, whichever you prefer kid."
"Oh okay. What are hugs Bucky?"
"Well I'm hugging you right now. You hug people ti show your emotions. Like comfort, thankfulness, happiness, love. It's what friends do."
"Wait wait wait. You never had a hug before?? Like ever????" a new voice boomed. It sounded genuine but way too loud. You flinched instinctively and hid your face in Bucky's shoulder. He tightened his hold on you for comfort.
"Can you be any louder Thor? And no she was practically raised in hydra, they don't exactly hug around." Bucky said.
"I am sorry, lady Y/N. For frightening you, and for my inappropriate question. I am Thor Odinson." he said coming closer to you.
"It's okay Mr. Thor. I'm Y/N Y/LN, nice to meet you." you said shyly.
"Oh it's lovely meeting you too. I came here because brother Stark asked me to ask you if our presence is wished upon now."
"Huh, what do you think, doll? Ready to meet 'em now? No pressure." Bucky quietly asked, only for you to hear.
You tought about it for a second, but if everyone is nice as three you already met, you'd like to meet them all. And with quiet "okay", Bucky nodded to Thor and he left to call the others in.
-
That night you layed in your bed, thinking of that day's events. You met everyone, since no one had missions assigned. They were all really nice to you. Even Loki, which surprised every avenger. You were not sure why tho, Loki was nice, and his voice was comforting. The Maximoff twins were really funny, and Tony already started making you your own room! Everyone else you've met was aweosme: Natasha, Clint, Steve, Sam and Rhodey. Peter was shy but nice, he promised to show you some good movies and he was belivered when you said you don't know what those are.
Bucky was still you favorite. He stayed the longest, promising to come and visit you first thing in the morning. You hoped he'll hug you again, you were quite fond of hugs now.
-
Few months passed since avengers saved you. Life couldn't be better at this point. You were home schooling, or rather preparing to go to real school next year. Peter already introduced you to his friends from school you are going to attend. You were training to become an avenger, and it was so exciting.
You were currently having breakfast tho, sitting in between Sam and Bucky who were bickering about one thing or other. Tony was dancing funnily while making pancakes, while Nat was trying to throw as many blueberries as possible at him. You heard Clint somewhere in wents above you, probably setting up a prank. You smiled to yourself. Even though you never knew love, or had a family until two months prior, avengers accepted you. They were slowly becoming your family, and you couldn't imagine your life without them. ;)
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infinitegalahad · 3 years
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YOUR PROMPTS ARE OPEN!!!! 🥳🥳🥳 im so excited this time has come! you know i'll probably send a few but for my first i'd like to request #'s 33 and 50 from the fluff prompts with my dear shifty, of course. mucho love 2 u!
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A LITTLE PIECE OF HOME
Summary: Before your childhood friends Popeye and Shifty are shipped out, Popeye brings his new camera and decides to make some last minute memories. 
Word-Count: 1.9k 
Prompts: “can i keep it, the photo of us?” and “look at me.”
A/N: pearl, my love, my life-HI! your little request was beyond fun to write! this piece is short and sweet in (hopefully) all the right places-anything for you! shifty is our sweet sunshine boy and it was a pleasure to write for you. i hope you request more prompts soon my love-thanks you for being there for me. your messages always brighten my day. i hope you enjoy ❣️✨ 
Masterlist | Send In A Prompt!
It was the perfect day outside. In Virginia, it felt like summer all year round. But today was different-it was absolutely gorgeous. The sun shined bright as the heat burned down on your exposed shoulders with the sun making your skin become pink. The day seemed too perfect for it to end so soon.
You, Darrell, and Robert had been friends since the three of you were in diapers. You all grew up in a small tight-knit town; living down the same dirt road that went for miles on end, going to the same Sunday church and packed diner for pancakes and milkshakes, walked all over the train tracks, the three of you were conjoined at the hip. Wherever they went, you went with them.
Robert was the one who brought the group together. In second grade, Robert and Darrell had been playing during recess one day and saw you, sitting all by yourself with tears coming out of your big eyes and your hair and dress all covered in dirt. Darrell saw you and ran over. He didn’t know you, but he hated seeing other people sad-so not only were you crying, but Darrell burst into loud sobs, followed by Robert. When you had stopped crying, Darrell and Robert took you to their little play corner and got wet clothes, rubbing the dirt from your face. The boys in your school had been teasing you and kicked dirt in your direction, messing up the outfit your mama had made for you. While Darrell attempted to “make you pretty” again, he asked for your name and asked if you had any friends. Once you told him your name and that you had no friends, he said that he and Robert were your new friends from now on.
And they truly were.
Now the three of you we’re in your twenties-still living in that small town in Virginia. Each of you had changed in appearance. Popeye grew into his round-face, his thin hair receding, but his dimples and slurred accent still remaining the same. Shifty, well to you-he was handsome. He hadn’t changed one bit, but every day he got even more handsome to look at it. He grew from the sweetheart who cried with you in second grade to the boy who offered to take you platonically to prom since nobody was “in their right mind” to do so. The boy with the sun-tanned skin and comforting smile was your best friend and the love of your life. But how could you tell him? Almost every girl wanted him. Bless their hearts, but he was too shy for his own good-and so were you. Considering your experience with men, you decided it was best if you and Shifty would stay friends. The two of you had done some for nearly a decade. But as you got older, it got harder to contain those feelings. Whenever you looked at him, you felt like you were going to throw up your heart.
The three of you all believed that you would live in this town for the rest of your lives and until you were all old and real adults. But that all changed in an instant.
Robert and Shifty had signed up for the Paratroopers and we’re being shipped out to Toccoa early next morning. They had broken the news to you last night at Shifty’s house with his poor Ma, breaking into tears. Just like his ma, Shifty’s big eyes began to burst into tears, which made everybody cry. Whenever he got emotional, it always reminded you of a younger and more innocent Shifty, the one that never missed a single shot and loved nature. Your one, true friend who you could tell anything to, the one who knew your small quirks and deepest secrets. The one man that you loved more than anything in the world that was now slipping through your fingers.
In that very field you sat in, you stayed silent most of the time. Shifty had his rifles slung over his shoulders, donning light blue overalls as he and Popeye walked around, casually conversing about being Paratroopers. You hide behind the tall grass, slowly picking the petals off of a bright daisy, muttering to yourself. You watched his every move; his lips moving with a smile, his smooth skin glittering in the sun, and his chocolate brown hair becoming golden in the bright sun.
You had become so lost in your own little world that you didn’t even notice Shifty, standing right next to you. He poked your shoulder and saw you looked up with a confused face, progressing your surroundings.
“Y/n? You okay?” He asked, bending down with his hands on his knees. “You’ve been awfully quiet.”
You looked up and subtle smiled to cover up your sadness. “I am, Darrell. Just a little sleepy.”
Darrell held out a free hand in front of your face, “Well, you wanna with me just a little?
You silently responded and took his hand, which lingered for longer than you wanted it to. His hands had been so worked, his skin remained as soft as silk. His fingertips finessed against your palm. The two of you walked side by side as you walked side by side, the sounds of the wind blowing through the tall grass filling the silent void.
Darrell was a little concerned by your quiet behavior. You were normally very energetic about him and Robert, but you were as silent as a mouse today. It was your last time truly with him and for Robert for one month, one year, who knew how long they would be gone for. Darrell maybe would never see you again, the small town the two of you grew up in, your bright smile. He wanted to see that every single day; whether that be waking up to you in the morning or having a little piece of you overseas.
Darrell was very in touch with his emotions, unafraid to conceal them. His ma always taught him to be honest, and that’s what he did best. So when you were down, he had to fix it before it was too late.
“Y/n?” He said in a low tone, turning over to see you, unresponsive as you looked down at your fiddling hands. You were hurting, and it broke his heart to see what. “Can you tell me what’s bothering you?”
You were unresponsive as you kept your eyes down, your hands scrunching with the fabric of your flowy skirt. He had done nothing wrong-he never had done anything wrong to you ever. But it was hard to think that the next time you would hear from Shifty-it could be a military letter and announce that he had died a hero. Just another number in a never-ending war. And that you, a fool, never confessed how you felt to your childhood best friend.
Darrell stopped in his tracks and let out a soft sigh, tenderly grabbing your forehand to stop you as well. His free hand moved to the edge of your chin, gently tilting it sideways so you would make eye contact with him.
“Look at me,” Darrell politely requested, his voice shaky.
You followed his request and looked at him, seeing that he was fighting back tears. You weren’t the only one, which made you feel relieved and even sadder.
“Oh Darrell...you know if I start with my waterworks, you’ll be followed’ after,'' You remarked and let out a dry chuckle, masking the incoming tears. It was too late and a stray tear escaped from Shifty’s eye, his pink lips quivering as he was speechless.
Just like you had stated, two tears came from your eyes as you used a finger to wipe him away. “Told ya’ so. Look at us, just little kids.”
Darrell rested in your palm, rubbing against it like a cat would with a pillow. “Like it was yesterday. I remember washing the dirt from your cheeks so I could make you look pretty again. Don’t know why I ever said that-you still are pretty.”
You patted his cheeks as you lead his hands down into your own, squeezing them. Darrell and you stood in the open field, hands tangled with each other, the wind blowing against you as the grass tickled your bare feet. Not only did the humidity make you feel warm, but so did the growing heat in your cheeks.
“How do you tell someone you love them?” Darrell casually questioned to break the silence that was growing in the wind.
A smile crept on your face, “Just like your ma would say, you just gotta be honest with yourself.”
“Well, I think I love you. No, I don’t think. I know it.” Darell declared, holding your hands close to his chest. “I wanted to let you know. I didn’t wanna ever tell you.”
You tilted your heart and let out a dreamy sigh. “Oh, Darell...I…”
The sudden click and flash of a camera before blinded you and Shifty. You squint your eyes as they burned with flashes of white light as Shifty pulled you into his chest, his hands protectively resting on your lower back.
It was just Robert, holding his brand new camera over his eyes, his thin eyebrows raised and mouth wide open in shock. Instead of reacting, Shifty and you stayed close together, both red in the face along with Robert.
Robert took the photo out of the camera and shook it, tucking it into Shifty’s pocket. You opened your mouth to speak, but Robert beat you to it.
“I’ll leave you lovebirds to it,” Robert said as he turned around, walking away in a hurry, “I’ll see ya at the Power’s for supper-I hope.”
Once Robert had left, Shifty dug his fingers into his pocket to retrieve the photo. You leaned against his chest and observed the photo. Robert had caught the two of you in the middle of your confession, hands tangled as your eyes met. Both of you had smiles on your faces-and Darrell looked amazing-even if he was in black and white.
“That’s not a bad photo of you,” You complimented as you leaned into his nice smelling chest, “You looked handsome.”
“And you looked pretty-but you always do.” Shifty shot back, planting a kiss into your face. He observed the photo and then looked down at you to compare, a big smile appearing on his face like a child on Christmas morning. Shifty had found his answer, and it was not only right in front of him but in his fingertips.
“Can I keep it, this photo of us?” Darrell said in your hair as he shook the photo, “When I need a piece of home. I’ll give you my whole heart, anything you want, darlin’.”
You nodded your head, “Yes, you can. You don’t need to give me anything-but can I ask you something?”
“Yes, darlin’. Anything,” Darrell stated as he looked down at your adoringly. He looked like he wanted to give you the whole world in that moment, If he could have, he would have.
“We only got a night left together for a long time. Can we spend it all together? Just one night?”
Shifty flashed his bright smile and kissed each knuckle on your hand, leaving a small mark. “Yes ma’am.”
Once Shifty had neatly stored the cherished photograph of you into his breast project, the two of you grabbed each other's hands and walked down the gravel road, back to the Power’s residence for supper. You leaned against his shoulder, letting him lead you. Whenever Darrell had gone, you would follow along. You knew your last few hours together were short, but if it was your last time ever seeing Darell-you wanted to make the most of it.
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Text
Random Wanda Vision Thoughts--
Episode 1: I am an emotional bitch crying at Wanda and Vision saying “i do” at the end of episode 1, like can these babies please catch a break? they just want to be happy. 
Also Agnes and the 70′s show mom are my favorite wtf. 
STARK TOASTERS I SEE YOU. 
WHO IS WATCHING THEM WTF 
Episode 2: 
Dottie should die, she seems like the type who needs gently run over by a bus
WHO IS IN THE RADIO
Elizabeth Olsen is so cute in this, absolutely adorable 
IS THAT DAVID SCHWIMMER PLAYING THE PIANO
Vision is drunk from getting gum in his gears, I’m actually cackling right now. 
Tiny bit culty with the “for the children” thing, huh? Yikes
BABY BUMP! 
Some creepo decides to get in on their world and Wanda literally went “i think the fuck not, let’s try this again and this time in technicolor” 
is that the cop who asked out Ant Man on the radio?
The difference in “sitcom” Wanda who is happy in her world and “real life” Wanda when she realizes something isn’t right is honestly astonishing and Grade A Face Acting. See what happens when they let women do more on screen then walk around in tight clothes with full lips parted in a sexy pout? 
Episode 3: 
Seventies Vision’s hair is ENDING ME, I can’t even deal with that. 
IT HAS TO BE DAVID SCHWIMMER except he looks like “russ” from friends instead of “ross” 
Poor Vision is not handling impending fatherhood well 
COMIC BOOK NAME DROP BILLY AND TOMMY I LOVE IT 
Poor pregnancy fritzing Wanda. DID WANDA JUST GLITCH A TIME ERASE AND NOT MEAN TO? Listen, I did not expect to love them as a couple this much. EW HER WATER BROKE OMG 
A STORK 
Oh Wanda, poor baby she’s so afraid, I write way too much fan fiction about how all these characters are secretly terrified to go through life alone to be okay with this. 
Why did I start crying immediately when the babies were born, I’m too emotional for this. She is so beautiful and Vision is so soft meeting his son as himself, oh my gosh. THE TWIN SCREAMS while the other twin comes omg this is Grade A Sitcom bullshit. 
The doctor knows something is Up and so do Herb and Agnes. *don’t be suspicious, don’t be suspicious*
...have we actually seen Ralph and I’m just blanking on it? WHY DON’T THEY LIKE GERALDINE? WHO IS SHE?
Oh no i’m crying again over pietro and the sokovian lullaby. Don’t let me watch this while I’m PMSing wtf this is torture. GERALDINE KNOWS ABOUT ULTRON
OH SHIT WANDA IS PISSED LOOK AT THAT DANGEROUS LADY. that head tilt is fucking lethal. 
I love agnes oh man. I know because of spoilers she’s something of a bad guy? but I love her
WHAT HAPPENED TO GERALDINE OMG DID WANDA KILL HER
Oh no, not dead. Just kicked tf out of the bubble. I just realized the symbol is for Sword. Is this some sort of experiment to keep Wanda contained post Endgame? I should have read more spoilers, I’m fucking confused. 
Episode 4: OH HOLY SHIT IT’S MONICA RAMBEAU AND IT’S POST EG SNAP OH MY GOSH SHE HAS NO IDEA SHES BEEN GONE FOR FIVE YEARS MY HEART IS BREAKING MY HEART IS BREAKING I CAN’T TAKE IT 
It IS the cop that hit on Ant Man! WHAT DO THEY MEAN WESTVIEW DOESN’T EXIST 
Oh it’s Darcy! Damn straight it’s Dr. Lewis. How very shocking, a woman was the one to show a room full of Ridiculous Men what’s going on?
ZOMBIE VISION OH MY GOD “no we can’t” oh man she is starting to CRACK and Vision knows something is wrong OH NO 
At this point I should point out that I am 1000% surprised at the quality of the show and 1000% pleasantly surprised by how much I’m enjoying it. The bar for Wanda’s character development was literally subterranean, but this is has been frankly sort of amazing?? 
Episode 5
Agnes asking about “taking it from the top” WHAT. I love so much the way the characters “break character” it’s so interesting and well done! WHY IS WANDA LYING TO VISION. 
WHERE IS RALPH
oh my god the babies are children now?? why isn’t agnes noticing?? THEY’RE SO CUTE I COULD CRY ALL OVER AGAIN 
I do not. trust. hayward. Why is he asking about Wandas nickname? Monica knows whats up-- she knows Wanda is grieving and hurting. 
THE VISIONS CORPSE WHAT? WHAT IS WANDA DOING OH MY GOD SHE STOLE VISION. Vision has a living will? Don’t you have to be human for that? Are you telling me the woman that loved Vision would straight up ignore his wish to not be turned into a weapon after his death? I have a hard time with this. 
Oh no Vision is starting to worry me. He’s onto Agnes, he’s noticing Wanda getting careless...the boys are adorable though. Good on Agnes for not even flinching. 
DAMN RIGHT WANDA COULD HAVE TAKEN OUT THANOS LETS HAVE SOME RESPECT PEOPLE. Also, why is Monica being sketchy about Captain Marvel? 
EMAIL ALERT EMAIL ALERT “none of it is real.” oh my god what is happening?!?!
“Is this yours?” OH MY GOD. “This will be your only warning” she is so unafraid and I love her for it. I love her accent coming back when she breaks characters LOOK AT HER TURNING ALL THOSE MEN AROUND I LOVE HER. 
“Fix the dead” oh my god the shock on her face. The absolute irony of her trying to tell her boys there’s rules when she’s writing the playbook as she goes. Oh my god. “Can’t I?” Jesus, then the credits start rolling because she wants the episode to be over but Vision won’t let her OH MY GOD. My heart is breaking
WHAT DOES IT MEAN SHE DOESN’T KNOW 
SHE RECAST PIETRO
Episode 6
OOOOH look at the classic costumes! Pietro is slaying me. I mean, it’s the wrong pietro but its still very funny. The way Vision calls her out and then plays it off is.... spooky. She is fully aware thats not her brother. “Be good.” holy shit. 
Look at me not liking Hayward again. “which one is the sassy best friend” i feel like that’s....racist. “don’t use the last five years as an excuse to be a coward” DRAG HIM SIS 
Listen Uncle Pietro being a little shit head is my favorite. I use the OG Pietro in my fics but this one is hilarious. 
Vision lied about being on duty? Yikes. The one house where people are stuck in a loop? YIKES. Its crazy how everyone is starting to be super aware of Wanda pulling the strings--MAGIC CHILD OMG. 
Whats past ellis avenue? Is that the limit of Wanda’s powers? I don’t super understand how Vision has his powers if he’s technically dead. HE DOESN’T KNOW WHAT THE AVENGERS ARE she really just gave him enough life to exist just barely. Agnes knows he’s dead so she wasn’t snapped??
Agnes’s witchy laugh while dressed like a witch is legit awesome. We call that FOREEEEEEEEESHADOWING! Oh and there’s Ellis Ave. Got it. 
Monica’s blood is changed?? Idk how to feel about Black Character willing to die for White Charaxter? I mean I know Wanda should be Jewish but still. Uncomfortably close to icky tropes but maybe I’m reading too far into it.
YIKES where was she hiding the kids till now? How’d she do all this? “I’m not a stranger or your husband” YIKES.
OH MY GOD DEAD PIETRO
OH MY GOD VISION STAY IN THE BUBBLE SOMEONE SAVE HIM SAVE HIM OMG BILLY CAN HEAR HIS DADDY DYING SAVE HIM
“The people need help” oh Vision you are truly Worthy
She literally expanded her world to save him omg
DARCY WHERED YOU GO geez look at power of this girls mind it’s about damn time we got a glimpse at just how intense her powers are
Season 7
Ok is this like a reality show? Oh man she is GLITCHING.
Oh no it’s just Wanda not Wanda vision cos she feels alone? So sad. She really is losing it isn’t she and not in a “lol how awkward” sortnof way but in that truthful hard to watch way that so many of us feel when we’re at the breaking point
“I actually did bite a kid once” I literally ugly laughed right there
I KNEW I COULDNT TRUST HAYWOOD
It’s so nice to see Darcy used in a real way. Her character was totally wasted in Thor
The way Wandas little interviews get more and more sad :(
Uhhh what does that mean Agnes is quiet on the inside? Again with the Ralph thing. I’m starting to think there’s no Ralph at all??
LOOK AT THIS GIRL WITH HER SPACE ROVER . She’s got that same look of determination her mama had. WHAT IS HAPPENING TO HER WHY ARE HER EYES BLUE
“....soooo Wanda killed me?” I’m ugly laughing again and I shouldn’t be but the comedic delivery is excellent. The whole “office” vibe with the cameras is making an otherwise devastating episode fairly funny
LOOK AT THIS GIRL STANDING UP TO WANDA we love a sharp cheekbones beauty
“Maybe I already am” I mean, I would have loved to hear that post Ultron when for some reason everyone blamed Tony for everything?? But hearing it now is just horrifying and I hate it
Oh vision deciding to go get to his wife is beautiful.
WHERE ARE THE BABIES WHERE ARE THE BOYS OH MY GOD IM FREAKING OUT WHAT BASEMENT THATS NEVER GOOD
Uh hey what the fuck is up with Agness creepy basement of horrors??
AGATHA HARKNESS OH MY GOD
This song is a BOP wtf she deserves an Emmy for this shit
Snoopers gonna snoop what?
Episode 8
Of course it’s Salem, where else would a witch story start
“They simply bent to my power” What a queen
lmaoooo THAT ACCENT COMES AND GOES Agatha really said what we’ve all been thinking
Wait so Wandas power drew Agatha in? I thought maybe Agatha trapped her here?? SHE DOESNT KNOW WHAT WANDA IS
THE BABIES
Oh ouch this trip down memory lane is gonna hurt me isn’t it?
Oh no her mama I’m dying inside send help. The TV sitcoms. Oh my god is this her last memory before her parents died. HELP ME I CANT WATCH THIS
Oh my god, she had powers when she was little?? SHES NOT AN EXPERIMENT???
Listen I generally think telling a story retroactively is lazy writing? Just give us a well developed story the first time?? But this is BRUTAL and brutally well done.
SHE SAW HERSELF IN THE MIND STONE???
Would it have been so difficult for them to give us even a PEEK at this version of wanda vision in CACW? Marvel has the worst habit of just popping up like “oh hey these two love each other all the sudden with no real reason for it” but this is wonderful. So much character development.
Oh listen to this woman begging to be able to bury her husband omg. WAIT SO SHE DIDNT BREAK IN AND TAKE HIM?? WHAT ARE THEY DOING TO VISION?? DID HE PUSH HER INTO THIS PSYCHOTIC BREAK?? HE TOTALLY PLAYED HER INTO RECREATING VISION SHE JUST WANTED CLOSURE. He literally showed her visions dismembered corpse and said “say goodbye” I will kill this dude wtf
“I can’t feel you” guys I have to pause this so I can cry for a minute
“I can’t feel you” and then she leaves. Totally alone in the world. My heart is an empty husk.
Why the house though? Why west view?
OH FUCK ME UP ARE YOU KIDDING ME VISION WAS GOING TO BUILD THEM A HOUSE I CANT TAKE THIS ANYMORE
It’s not even real vision? Just the projection of her broken heart? “Welcome home” I am broken. Physically broken.
CHAOS MAGIC
SCARLET WITCH
I CANNOT
OH MY GOD WHITE VISION??? NO NO NO
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shyrose57 · 3 years
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YOO BROTHERS ANON BACK FROM THE DEAD? My phone started to fucking die half way (like extreme lag, keyboard stopped working at times, sudden shut offs, etc) and I was too scared to work on this in fear it'd get deleted. But im fucking back and have a new phone so I was able to finally finish. Plus after I finished the Brothers AU stuff I decided I hated Tip of The Iceburg AU lore and wanted to redo it so held off til I got that mostly done. I'm also trying to redo From Future to Past a lil bit but thats going slowly and decided I already waited way to long. Some other stuff happened as well like falling out of the fandom (Breath of The Wild and Linked Universe I got into and am actually still kinda in) then getting tossed back in but, anyway there's some smaller details I left out of Rans time living in the wild but everything here is the big stuff. 
Keep in mind most of this happens when he's just 13. And he never acknowledges or treats his trauma, leaving it to build and affect him more and more over time. 
When Ran first steps out of Mizu and into the world, he has nothing but a sword at his back and a book with little information on how to survive at his hip. The book really only provides him how to make certain things (like tools) and some basic information (Spiders are passive in daytime, how to farm, and basic information about each nether biome). The book acts more like a brief overview of the overworld and little information on how to survive than an actual survival book. Because of this the book is basically useless, Ran eventually uses it as a way of marking down notes and ripping out papers to cover wounds and tie things. He quickly learns that sleeping in high places (like a tree or a hole in a mountain) is the safest possible place to sleep, as no mobs or people can get him. Though due to the nights of constant screaming from mobs, his own internal fighting, and eventual hunting, he develops insomnia and paranoia. Leaving him unable to close his eyes in fear of being ambushed, believing himself to be forever unsafe and in danger. When he does manage to sleep he keeps his weapons nearby (like in his hand or under his pillow) and jumps awake at the slightest sound. 
He moves around constantly, never staying in one place for more than 2 weeks. He eventually finds a snow biome and after seeing the little amount of mobs and knowing the snow is to deep for any sane human to try to travel through, he decides to stay there for a entire year and a half before moving again. During this time he grows both physically and mentally. He goes from being a small, lithe 5'5 13 year old to being a strong 6'7 15 year old. He also uses this time to come to terms with what happened and swear revenge against Ranbob for everything he's been through and everyone who's died. Even when Ran came to terms with what his brother did, the promise "Ill never abandon you." Continues to ring in his head, which does nothing but fuel his hatred, believing his brother has been lying to him ever since he was a child. While also growing his knowledge on the world and his survival knowledge, becoming an almost perfect survivalist. 
When he was first alone and dealing with all the emotions brought upon him, he finds out he's hunted very suddenly. He first approached Raq (who he didn't know at the time) when he was desperate and fresh out of Mizu, asking him if there's any nearby town or city or really anything. Raq pretends to want to help Ran and let's him stay at his camp, giving him food and a warm place to sleep. But its 2 full days later, deep in the night when Raq finally trys to attack him, aiming to incapacitate him. But Ran is able to escape him and run away but not without a injury. 
During the fight Raq manages to hit him, specifically on his left ear. He manages to cut deep, but not deep enough, leaving the top of his ear just barely hanging on. Ran runs away and actually has a bit of a head start due to him tripping Raq. But Raq manages to follow/track him, due to the blood flowing out of Rans ear. Ran eventually realizes Raq is tracking him by the blood trail he's leaving, so he stops, steals himself, and rips off the remaining part of his ear, barely holding back a yell, then Ran pushes his hand down on the wound and continues to run. Raq finds the ear and simply hums, intrigued by the lengths Ran will go to escape, before turning around, deciding to let Ran escape this time, because he knows he'll see him again. Ran continues to run, terrified and borderline crying due to the fear and pain. For the next 3 days he believes he is still being followed by Raq so he continues to run, never resting until he eventually collapses from exhaustion. His ear eventually heals over but never grows back, it becomes a reminder of the fact he is being constantly hunted by people and will never escape them. 
Ran encounters Raq a total of 32 times during his time living out in the wild. And every time Ran manages to get away, though sometimes more injured than others. Eventually it gets to the point Raq greets Ran like a old friend. After their 3rd encounter Raq starts to bring others with him, eventually he has 5 others helping him hunt Ran. Though Ran grows and is able to either outwit them by using traps or is just simply able to avoid them most of the time. Though he still gets hit at times, once he made a mistake and a trap failed, leading to him getting stabbed and passing out cause blood loss.
The Nether is less than kind to Ran but kinder than the overworld. He gets shot a lot from both ghasts and skeletons. And almost falls into lava multiple times. He gets stabbed and trips more times than he can count. But he actually manages to make acquaintance with the Piglins he meets due to him being polite to them and giving them gold for nothing in return. He actually is close enough to them to get directions for free and is even given resistance potions when Ran states he is leaving and not coming back as a farewell and stay safe gift. He ends up staying in the Nether for much longer than a normal person would and becomes adapt at traversing and surviving in it. It almost becomes his safe spot because the hunters have never followed him into the Nether. He would've lived there if he could, but due to the heat he isn't used too and the fact he just despised Ghasts more than the hunters, and they were everywhere in there, he didn't stay. But would often vist. Eventually he found netherite which he quickly covered his first and only diamond sword with. His sword also had the enchantments, sharpness 2, unbreaking 3, and sweaping edge. Over time and use the enchantments dimmed, only faintly remaining. At this point Ran had to flee his snow biome house due to a sudden attack, leaving behind the materials he needed to fix the enchantments and his sword. So he abandoned using it, but kept it cause it helped him through years of fighting, he can't exactly drop and leave it.
Extra stuff I couldn't find a way to fit in:
-Ran manages to find a village but actually gets kicked out cause he punches the blacksmith for upping the price of an iron sword.
-Ran slowly grows more cold, uncaring, rude, and harsh over time due to trauma. He doesn't realize he became this way due to untreated trauma until he arrives to The Pit where Watson is able to help him start to slowly heal. Which is why he becomes more open and joking in The Pit because he feels safe and loved. 
-When the group leaves The Pit he becomes cold and hard again due to habit. Its his way of subconsciously defending himself.
-His body is covered in scars due to the hunters and his brushes with mobs. 
-Ran knows how to tailor his own clothes and has made many different kinds of clothes, all designed for certain biomes. 
-Ran never farmed, he always hunted.
-Ran never really built anything, instead he preferred to dig into the side of a mountain or make shelter in a cave. Its only in the snow biome did he actually build a house. And even then it was very clearly meant to be a temporary house. Though he did end up living there longer than he intended. 
-He was at first extremely reluctant to kill, but was forced to kill hunters and animals multiple times. To the point he became almost numb to it and wouldn't hesitate to kill if he was threatened. 
-He would sometimes dream about his family only for it to end with them being slaughtered, which really messed him up and he would just lay in bed mindlessly every time it happened. These dreams still happen. 
Also a edit to when the brothers met in the Pit, Ran actually gets his hands on a broken trident accidentally left in the arena (its the front end only, and the middle spike is shorter than the rest due to a error when being made) and ends up tripping Ranbob then stabbing the trident into the ground over him (if that makes sense?), actually trapping Ranbob, with the middle spike just above his throat, leaving him unable to move unless he wants to cut his neck and trapped on the ground. 
Tip of The Iceburg:
So Karl's watch is still damaged. And Isaac is still the one to convince him to seek help from the others. But midway through the meeting Phil speaks up, mentioning how he found a book in a ruined village that had a replica of Karl's Watch etched into the cover, but is in a language he's never seen. After passing it around the table no one recognizes it. Everyone's discouraged until Foolish suggests they look for the other Travelers (what ima call the Tales people) and maybe one of them will know. Eventually, with picture pinning of supposedly who could be in their world, they all split off into groups to look. Ran is still the first found, but when he's shown the book he actually confirms a part of it is in a old enderman language that fell off long ago, he's able to translate half of that section but says that Ranbob, who studied old languages much more thoroughly than Ran can do the rest (cause here their still brothers but nothing in Brothers AU happened). Giving everyone hope. Eventually Ranbob gets found and translates the rest, but a great amount is still untranslated, which is a problem. So now its a journey of finding more people and mixing languages to find out the rest. 
A sudden twist to the story happens when Billiam joins, and due to his experience with the egg is actually able to translate a random page in the back of the book (the egg made its own language to prevent its plans being discovered). Where they find out the egg is what broke Karls watch, because to it humans are nothing but entertainment, and it gets joy seeing them suffer and wants to mess with their lives. When it gets revealed to the rest of the SMP what the page says, everyone gets pissed. And even when its found how to get the Travelers home they refuse to leave until the egg is destroyed, a few are mad at it and want revenge, others are scared and want to try to prevent it from coming into their time. Karl eventually relents and lets them join in making a plan to take down the egg.  
Also have some fluff scenarios with the brothers since its been a while:
-There's two types of resistance potions in their world, fire resistance and water resistance. The latter of which the brothers have memorized how to make. Their friends do not know water resistance exists. Which leads to the brothers pranking their friends by drinking some then jumping into a lake. Giving Watson a heartattack and making Isaac sob. The two quickly reemerge seeing their reactions and calm them and reassure them. After the explanation you can bet they got a talking too and where grounded. 
-Ran teaches Ranbob to fight!
-Ranbob teaches Ran to fish, Ran complains the entire time. 
-Ranbob responds by threatening to teach Ran how to farm. Ran stops complaining after that….mostly
-Everyone has found the brothers either asleep against each other or one asleep on the other at least twice. 
-*insert Arthur get out of the tank meme but instead it's Ranbob trying to get Ran out of a tree so he can greet people.*
-Ran has his first night in years without a nightmare! 
Now something else I'm planning to work on soon: What happened to Ranbob after Ran left Mizu?
I hope me sending stuff is still ok after so long of sending nothing. 
Good to have you back, Brothers Anon! And sorry to hear about your phone, that sounds like it must've a day.
--------
Brothers AU:
I see we're back to Traumatize The Brothers Time, fantastic.
The fact that Ran has these items on him is interesting. Did he just have them with him when he was fleeing? Did he have the time to grab them? Was he preparing ahead? What led to him having these useful tools on hand when he was forced to flee?
How does he fare with mobs, being a mob hybrid himself? I think it's somewhat been implied that he's good with Endermen, but what about others?
How do the gladiator gang go about helping with his insomnia and paranoia, if they are aware of it?
What's it like for him during his time in the snow-biome, since he's there for awhile? Does he make a more-permanent camp/shelter? Do anything particularly interesting?
Poor Ran! That must've been quite the shock for him, and I imagine it didn't help his trust issues.
How does he get to the Nether? Does he have a base there? What do the piglins think of him, and vice versa? How does the Nether life effect him overall?
What happened to those materials left behind? Where they discovered? Does he manage to go back and get them on the roadtrip? Do they visit his homes on the trip?
How does the group react to his sudden change when they're leaving? What kind of clothes does he make? Does he ever make some for the others? Does he enjoy it, or is it just because it's necessary?
How do the fishermen feel about the close call with the trident, and what happens to the weapon?
------------
Tip Of the Iceberg:
I don't remember if this was mentioned before, but was it Karl's watch that caused the issue then? Who wrote the book? Does the egg have a connection with them?
How do they fare with their plans to take down the Egg(and potentially the Eggpire, if that's a thing here)? How do those with previous experience with Egg feel about this, and what part do they play?
--------
Fluff! At long last!
I love how their thought process went to that. 'We can make water resistance potions, lets jump in a lake in front of our friends'.
That sounds like it should be entertaining.
Ranbob knows how to farm?
That's such a funny mental image. 'Ran, get out of the tree, you have to socialize'. 'Hissing'.
Yay, good for him!
Ooo, what?
Always.
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hufflautia · 3 years
Text
Where it all started [Part 1]
Chapter 1 
Sometimes links don’t appear on posts. if you can’t see the link to “Chapter 1”, my masterlist is pinned to the top of my blog, and you can find it there.
Summary: Slytherin’s parents have another argument, but at this point, no one’s surprised. After all, they’re her parents. It would be abnormal if they didn’t argue. However, this one’s a biggie. The fight ends with the slam of a door and her dad packing his bags into the car and getting ready to leave. Desperate for him to come back, Slytherin’s mom forces her to go to him with a message that will surely make him stay. Buckle up folks, for this is where it all began. 
Slytherin stood on the sidewalk as she watched her dad pack up his things into the van. 
She dug her fingernails into her arm, her heart stinging with ache as her dad turned around with a smile on his face, a failed attempt to reassure her that it was going to be ok. It was all gonna be ok. After all, this was normal, right? It’s not like it was unusual that her dad was leaving again to go back to Florida, where the homewrecker waited for him, her outstretched hands eagerly opened up to him and his credit card. 
However, this was the first time he left abruptly. A spike of sorrow stabbed at Slytherin’s heart as she thought back to the sound of her parents’ door abruptly opening; soon after, she could hear angry stomps that quickly descended down the steps of the staircase. 
She could almost hear the hiss in her ear as she stood in the archway of the living room, watching her dad leave in the far distance. “Tell him that Ravenclaw’s crying,” her mother spat, pushing her towards the front door. “Quickly, before he leaves!” 
Slytherin internally sighed. How typical. Instead of resolving their relationship issues by going to couples therapy, her mom decided to throw all those burdens onto her daughter, who had already grown tragically used to being used as her puppet. 
She decided not to argue against going after her dad and trying to guilt-trip him into staying home as her mom wanted. Otherwise, she would be lectured on how she’s selfish and wouldn’t do this small thing for her mom, how she’s basically ruining this family by letting her dad leave, how family is so fucking important and manipulating her dad into staying would be vital to their happiness as a whole, how family this and family that. 
You get the point. Slytherin certainly did. That’s why she was currently standing awkwardly behind her dad, staring at his back as he lifted boxes into his car. 
“Um, Raven…” She paused. Her throat felt dry and tight. Swallowing with difficulty, she tried again. “Ravenclaw’s crying.” 
It wasn’t the crying itself that mattered. That wasn’t the main reason why her mom rushed her out the door to deliver the message to her dad. It was simply the fact that it was Ravenclaw who was crying. Let’s just say that he and his dad had a complicated relationship. 
Things were never the same between them after Ravenclaw sent an angry message to him via text when he was in Florida a year ago. The contents of the message reeked of disdain for his constant infidelity. When his mom found out, she shoved the phone into Slytherin’s face in the dead of night and asked if she knew about this. The glaring light from the screen nearly blinded her. 
Slytherin read the text messages through squinted eyes and could make out a few curse words here and there. Though she was slightly disoriented from the sudden ambush of information, it was clear to her that her brother resented their dad for what he did.  
That made Ravenclaw’s anguish even more useful in their mom’s opinion. Seeing the tears streak down his face when he heard that his dad was leaving again, she had a glorious idea. Perhaps if her husband knew of their son’s sorrow, he would reconsider his abrupt departure. After all, it was Ravenclaw who was crying. 
If it were Hufflepuff, that would be understandable—she can get quite emotional sometimes. But it was Ravenclaw, who was usually guarded and distant. One might suggest that he was secretly broken inside. But that’s not the point, at least not in his mom’s opinion. The main thing she was concerned about was that she could use his misery to her advantage! Maybe if her husband knew of his sadness, he would feel guilty enough to stay behind. After all, if his son, who despised him, was upset over his departure, perhaps it wouldn’t be so bad to stay home and endure his wife’s temper for a little while longer. 
Slytherin’s words did produce somewhat of a reaction. Her dad didn’t turn around for a while, but when he did, his eyes were slightly red and puffy. It was evident that he was trying to hold back his tears. One might think that this means that he’ll stay. He seemed distraught over the news that his son was crying because of his leave. Surely, he’ll stay, right? 
It wasn’t enough. Nothing ever seems to be enough.
“I’ll be back soon, okay?” He hugged her briefly and gave a light squeeze as a sign of reassurance. As a silent message that it was going to be ok. Even though everything was most definitely not okay. A thousand hugs and gestures of reassurance wouldn’t change this. 
Slytherin didn’t react angrily to his refusal, the unspoken declaration of No, I will not go back home. In fact, it seemed as if she didn’t react at all. However, if one were paying close attention, they would notice the sparkle in her eyes dim. But maybe there wasn’t a sparkle to begin with. She had been enduring this shit for so long that she forgot what it was like to be normal, to feel like the white kid you see in commercials, the one who seemed to radiate mirth, a type of energy that said, I don’t have a care in the world because life is so fucking great and I can’t stop smiling. She didn’t even bother to smile, a common facial expression when one is in a difficult situation and tries to diffuse the somber atmosphere by slapping a facade on their face, the corners of their lips upturned to form a grimace that resembles some sort of a smile—a twisted kind of smile, that’s for sure. Why should she pretend that everything was okay when it wasn’t? Instead, she merely nodded in response. 
When her dad pulled away to pack the last box into the trunk, she took a deep breath to diminish the familiar sense of abandonment that flooded her senses, to clear the warning signs that flashed in her mind. He’s leaving! Your dad is leaving! He’s abandoning you again. You’re apparently not important enough for him to stay. 
She stared at the ground, only looking up when she heard the sound of a car door slamming shut. The resounding click was all it took for the waterfalls to finally pour from her eyes, for it was at this moment when she realized that this was actually happening. This was no dream—it was reality. Her sad, devastating reality. Tears blurred her vision as she watched the car drive away, leaving her in the dust. 
Slytherin gasped in erratic breaths between her broken sobs as her eyes hung onto the tiny speck that resembled her dad who was driving 
away, 
away, 
and a-w-a-y.
Through the jumble of thoughts that clashed in her head, one thing was clear. Her dad was her dad, but only sometimes. 
Tears streaking down her face, she tried to soothe her pain with the belief that he would be back soon. If only she had known that it would be a while before he returned. If only he hadn’t left. Perhaps things would’ve been different for her if he stayed, for this was where it started. 
This marked the beginning of it all.   
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Comments and reblogs are a writer’s gold!
MASTERLIST ; sometimes links don’t appear on posts. if you can’t see the link to “MASTERLIST”, the masterlist itself is pinned to the top of my blog. check it out if you haven’t already! 
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Author’s note: HI! Were you surprised to see that I posted two fics in a row?? I hope you enjoyed this. Most of it was unfortunately based on what happened to me a year or two ago. I based Ravenclaw on my brother, who did actually cry when my dad was leaving after an argument, and yes, my wack mother did force me to run after my dad to tell him. One of the few differences is that I’m not a drug addict and I’m fine now so dont worry. 
Idk how I feel about this series, it is a lot darker from what I usually write. I know I’m gonna have to write more for creative writing class, so maybe i will continue it. I will try to think of how to turn these fics into something more positive, because this stuff is very heavy and depressing. however, that will be a little difficult because the plot itself is naturally drab. however, i will try to think of a happy ending for Faye/Slytherin. 
Shall we look at some wholesome pictures? 
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lmaoaoa i pasted this picture from the internet and tumblr glitched and pushed the pic all the way to the top. imagine seeing this dog at the beginning of the fic, that would be funny :’) 
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AWWWWWW I THINK THIS MIGHT BE MY FAVORITE
ok hold up i just realized that is probably a stuffed animal 😐 this is so embarassing lmaoaoa when i saw it i was like THAT IS SO FRICKIN CUTE
OK WAIT WTF NOW I THINK ITS AN ACTUAL DOG??? CAN SOMEONE HELP AND TELL ME IF ITS REAL OR NOT?!! at first, i thought it was real, but then i looked at the paws and it looked kinda fake and i was like this dog is too fluffy and wholesome to be real. BUT THEN I LOOKED AGAIN and i think the owners just put the pooh outfit over the dog?? what is going on with my brain.. but at the same time, its 2 am for me rn so maybe i should get some sleep BUT FIRST, LETS LOOK AT MORE DOGS <3 (lmaoaoa i feel like my friend would say “gosh ur such a hufflepuff” (menna im talking about u lmao omg hey gorl)) 
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After seeing this gryffindor pup, i immediately searched up “dog costumes hufflepuff” lmaoooooo
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OK THATS ENOUGH DOGS FOR NOW. Part 2 is coming soon. I already have it ready but I might not post it right away. 
That’s all for now. Be sure to let me know what you think. TOODELOOO!
TAGS:  @slytherpuff-shenanigans @lokijiro @xxkitsurikaxx @sara-is-boredd @skylee-skz   @determinedpines @draco22malfoy @pancakes-and-sugar  @casteel08 @indigosimon1998 @tell-that-to-my-feather @the-ugly-duck0 @prettyblueskylark  @okiguessimawitchnow @daisyinmyheart @peachyblue @korra4321 @shoyoockbby  @ravenflowersposts @walkinganomaly @parkerthemarker02 @hummingbird-hufflepuff @bumbblebeeeeee @luciferswife16 @iknow-im-cute @maisen98 @shadowsinger11 @tuonglam03 @fanfic-reblogger @mygc0re @rellasworld @sha3thehunter @croctusjuice @jadefox05 @d0uxs @charleii @kaylenthegreat @hufflepufflepukwudgie3897 @insertlongnamehere @trashpannda @ihate-myname @nowheredreamer @history-geek101 @strawberrypanda99 @nikkijovanic @hannanshi @sirenofthe7seas  @johannamariemst @badass-like-damon  @willow-salix @remmyswritings @x-whatsupdoc-x @dracosvftie @hitchhiker-of-the-galaxy @akerlizzie @thatfann @justanxiousme @another-witch @bucinjisung @elegantcroissantplaidpony @treefroggo @narritydream @hufflpuffles @adreameratdawn @leftpeanutturtleegg @turbulentbluebird5 @geekgirl69 @praiseourlordduck @quakemebacktothe50s @nomad-of-the-realms @stardustzainy  @theblackwolf21 @crakencc @introvertedrae @cryinbisexual @bojelina @cocoqueenstheword @manicpixiedreamtarot @velvetstrawberry @jxmpsuitx @simpering-simpleton @urfaveslytherin @asterinatlas @simpforkpop @pufflehuff929 @morallyambiguoussimp @applekenm @chunwest @oncergleekpotterhead @no1-importan @qiaopao  @dulduldoldul @schlongbottom @vickeyunicorn @peanut-in-the-goal @hufflepuffgirly @flvrqnce @nothingtoseehere812 @maxwellsgang @1d-killed-me @betacaroteno-lanudo @dragon-slayer-fairy1 @thatonebislytherin @dragonsandbread @justanotherperson @sophiexteresa @hmilkwhoney @writertwiddle @questionsbecameourocean @anomiatartle @coldsweetharmony @dont-hyuck @fixstationed @kindawannadietbh @trippy-morgan @xo-angel-ox @fangirlgeekandfreak @evolnura @mossy-axolotl @verylovelystars @boilyourteeth @megand2017 @malfoys-demigod @booksntings @joshirlangford @staymoarmyzen @poojxshxh @hedgepuffgirl @alverniaphi @verifiefangirl-mainblog @purpleskymalfoy @roxy3457 @rayanicaraynbow @jess-harrywars @starrysonic @tonksichu @lauxtbs @tumlbr-trasher @chelseasosa @thebiggestnaturaldisaster @swagangelhorsepickle @princessstoopid @pymmoon @emilyaneliperry @pond-waterr @pandapillow @saraleo95 @astrartss @trentalexanders @theoriginaljohnwatsonsblog @nevilletheplantboi @just--another--hufflepuff @yoongifiess @ajdqueen @annie-mcl @coloring-bud @majorfangirl37 @eatacrackerandstop @weasleytwinswheezes @imscaredofhorses @dontmindmeimjustabox @glitterykidlightmug @multi-fandom-nutjob @littleemotionalpanda @thewitcheswords  @blueberry-9-pancakes @worldsbestdilfbecky @qixnsriess @inexperiencedpotathoe @notsowiseravenclaw @captiniminnie @ruinyourface @da-fox-rangerrr @inkedintothepaper  @happy-puff @grandcyclecreation @dawinehouse @catiwisspuff​ @aasa2102​  @mae-25​ @sydthekidd98 @kokichismango @xxavaloraxx​ @iamahufflepuff​ @adoregin​ @sunnniiee @lewispoolerpayton @dumbbitch85​ @bumblebirbs​ @diggorycullen​ @protectorofsk8topia​ @silverhetdanes​ @zuko-28​  @beardedhumanoid​ @arianatorpotterhead​ @shipping-book-keeper​ @marvelenthusiast10​ @i-cannot-do-aesthetics​ @a-huffleing-lesbean​ @kaslec​ @hufflepuffwritess​ @mouthfacereborn​ @kodeinekissss​ @ihavenocontrolofmylifeeither​ @pinqgchuu​ @im-a-solanum-lycopersicum​ @clementines-x​ @stressy-depressy​ @sweetinvisiblewriter​ @absentmindeduniverse​ @asnowpuff​ @theofficialgaybestfriend​ @violayaxley​ @sunshinyyb @colettedelaurel​ @theoriginalsherlockholmesblog​ @i-have-a-bad-feeling​ @jpow345​  @gay-disaster826​ @bloodyxheaven​ @autumnpleaves​ @froggy-failure​ @toomanybandstocare​ @pink1babez​ @untitled-2424​ @sleepdeprivedgurl​  @chaseanders​  @wolfpack-arts-industries99​ @nugnugchick​ @queenofwordsandnerds​ @ganjeolhiddaeng​ @wordy-escapades​ @writtenfoxscreams​ @w0odr0ses​ @coolpetsmcubandit​  @crypticcandi​ @widowsgranger​ @fantasyprincess101​ @wiiltedflowers​ @aestheticworldd​ @miniaturefunnytraveldonkey​ @bucketofdeadroses​ @uwuplsh​ @softedits-exe​ @cel3stialone​ @sofiapeachyy​  @wanderaven92​ @eunnieah​ @marsupialsgotbloodyears​ @eurydicedior​ @neonuzumaki​ @uhhhem​
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khaleesiofalicante · 3 years
Note
HI, IT'S ME! YOUR LOCAL CHAOTIC WEIRDO!!!!! I'M BACK AGAIN LIKE I AM TWICE EVERY WEEK
IT'S MY BOY DAVID THIS TIME! WHY AM I SO HYPER! MAYBE BECAUSE THEY KISSED! AND I HAD TO SUPPRESS MY SCREAMS BCAUSE IM IN CLASS AND THE REST OF MY FAMILY IS OUTSIDE MY DOOR (NOT LITERALLY OFC)
OK OK OK OK OK OK
MAX AND DAVID ARE AT THE LONDON INSTITUTE YESYESYESYES
He rather liked that part in a story – when the hero fell, and everything seemed bleak. It always meant that hope was just around the corner. Because darkness never lasted. It was always followed by light. There was nothing more beautiful than that kind of sunrise.
THIS
I literally live my life by this analogy
AHHH DAVID IS ON HIS TRAVEL YEAR AND MAX IS WITH HIM
SCREAM
well i can't scream because my mom is sitting right there and I have class in 4 minutes so imma smile really wide
“Are you planning to read the entire library during your travel year?” Max chuckled.
“Of course not,” David replied. “I will need longer than a year to accomplish that goal.”
Me.
Wait
does max not being able to make portals have something to do with his lineage?
like
demon parent
ok so my programming class started 2 minutes early but screw programming I'm gonna be studying minds not this shit
ok that's a very bad attitude for someone who needs good grades in this year
Max was always hungry.
this is so me
KIT
KIT
KIT
KIT
KIT
KIT
TY
THEY MENTIONED TY
also if David doesn't become an institute head in the future THEN WHAT'S THE POINT
“Where is the kitchen?” Max interrupted.
max is such a mood
He had told Max that he had centuries to perfect his magic, that there was no need to rush it. Max had given him a noncommittal nod and nothing more.
HE'S GONNA MAKE THE BEST PORTALS YOU'LL SEE
“I won’t tell the Consul,” Kit winked.
At the mention of the Consul, David straightened up. He had been trying to get into Alec Lightwood’s good graces for years now. He didn’t think sharing a room with his son would do him any favors.
DAVID UDUCDFUHKDUHVUHSDH
PLEASE IF WE DON'T GET A CUTE ALEC AND DAVID SCENE SOON
KIT CALLED TESSA MOM
oh my god
Word was that Mr. Herondale had gone back to his obsession with brewing tea.
JACE
I have so many emotions right now but all I'm gonna say is that I'm so so proud of Rafael
“Do you not want to sleep with me?” Max asked.
UH-
WELL-
DAVID STOP THINKING ABOUT THE FUTURE AND ALL THE SHIT
STOP IT
OH MY GOD THE ONE BED TROPE
MAX IS IN HIS ARMS I'M ABOUT TO-
takes a deep breath don't scream. everyone outside this door thinks you're taking programming class
OH FOR FUCK'S SAKE JUST GET TOGETHER ALREADY
AWW JULIAN PAINTED PORTRAITS FOR THE INSTITUTE
The one of Will Herondale and Tessa Gray – A love that had transcended reality and lasted a lifetime.
The one of James Herondale and Cordelia Carstairs – A love that had started with a lie and then blossomed into nothing but happiness and devotion.
The one of Lucie Herondale and Jesse Blackthorn – A love that had been so powerful that it rewrote the past.
The one of Jace Herondale and Clary Fairchild – A love that had walked through hell and shaken up the heavens.
And then there the final one. The one of Kit Herondale and Tiberius Blackthorn – A love that had survived distance and darkness and doom.
This omg...
He wanted a love story. The kind he read in the books. The kind he saw in these portraits.
But he wasn’t a Herondale. He wasn’t sure if he was destined for that kind of love.
HEY
DON'T THINK LIKE THAT
The first part though
same
He might have been a little too excited. It was biologically impossible to control yourself when you find a stranger reading your favorite book in the whole world.
SO TRUE
“I see you already made a new friend,” Max said.
He sounded a little…odd. As if he was not pleased that David had made a new friend.
honey...
take a guess
can I jump in and bash their heads together?
“You are thinking of conjuring chocolate syrup, aren’t you?” David chuckled.
“How do you always know what’s on my mind?” Max chuckled back.
Because I know you, David wanted to say. I just wish I knew what’s in your heart too.
OH MY GOD I CANT WITH THIS
“You get chocolate syrup! You get chocolate syrup! You get chocolate syrup!” Max was yelling, standing on the chair.
They residents laughed harder, and David shook his head fondly. He hoped one day Max would pursue a career in theatre. He was a born showman.
can I have chocolate syrup?
also, the way David is just so fond of him like DYUSDGYJCDYUJM
“By the angel, do you have to be a drama queen about everything?” the boy next to them muttered – not so quietly.
David blinked. That was uncalled for.
But Max being Max was completely unfazed. “Of course I do. My Bapa would be personally offended otherwise.”
exactly you rude little shit
Max often pretended like people’s words didn’t hurt him - just as he pretend that fire doesn’t burn or wounds don’t bleed.
wow ok stop calling me out
Is max jealous??????
is he??????
how are people so good at languages like damn
TY
TY
TY
TY
“Oh my god,” Max groaned. “Is he already telling people to check on me?”
LMAO
using mundane medicine...
that's risky
but it's also something that WILL help
can't warlocks tamper with the blood samples?
A part of him wondered if that’s why he had agreed to send Max away to London – at least for a week. Because sometimes you didn’t want other people to see you were hurting.
alec I really goddamn hope you're dealing with this well
some of whom had even decided to die than get help from a warlock.
alright then gets my knives but you chose this :D
Nobody brought a book down for breakfast if they didn't like to read.
yes but sometimes also to seem busy so people won't bother you or you won't look alone.
“I know,” the boy said as he walked past them to the gate. “I sat on the stairs and thought about life for a few good minutes.”
his family is the one who took over David's previous institute (i can't spell that. marse- marselli- wat??) methinks.
The gang always visited whenever all of them were in the city together. They would have so much fun! Of course, the 'fun' mostly entailed Rafael stopping Georgia from drinking random potions she found in the stalls, Selena stopping Lexi from opening a psychic booth to help people talk to Raziel and of course David stopping Max from running to the gambling booths.
LMAO, I CANT WITH THIS-
Rafe: I am anxiety.
me at any given moment
EW TESTICLES HE'S EATING THOSE-
ok maybe I'm the only person who's really picky when it comes to food and doesn't eat the majority of things
“Anything on Magnus Bane?” Max asked.
“No,” the woman snapped and shoved some of the letters into a bag and hide it under the table. “Leave Magnus Bane alone!”
“Appreciate your loyalty,” Max winked at her and started examining a diary.
I like her.
"Everyone should be participating in this" -my programming teacher
me, an intellectual: participating in what?? goes to the class web THE FUCK IS THAT
“Something for the shadowhunter?” the woman smiled. “Perhaps an unpublished snippet from the Beautiful Cordelia?”
“Do you have any love letters?” David asked.
“Hmmm,” the woman went through the pages. “I do have a correspondence between an Iblis demon and Christopher Lightwood? Would you be interested in that?”
if u don't mind I would love to see both of those-
you know I just remembered I have a computer assignment I need to submit by the end of this week fml
“Never fall in love with an immortal,” she giggled again. “We don’t like staying in one place.”
SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP
MAX WHERE ARE YOU
why are we using x and 3 in programming class what the heck is going on
“I’m not just some warlock,” Max said, his voice low. “I’m Magnus Bane’s son.”
GIVE HIM THAT NECKLACE BACK
we usually have programming once a week on our physical school days and those are fun because my and my friend are continuously passing notes and talking to each other through writing
The scene where Max fought off all the evil people who tried to steal his valuable belonging. He would fight without breaking a sweat and throw magic fireballs at everyone and then get his necklace back. And then he would kiss David in front of everyone and it would somehow rain all of a sudden.
But life wasn’t a movie or a book. Life was just life.
life's boring
fuck life
I just heard a student ask "why are we not taking out the values of b and c" BESTIE I THOUGHT WE WERE DOING PROGRAMMING AND NOT ALGEBRA?????
“I know there wasn’t anyone to protect you before,” Magnus Bane had said. “But we are here now. We will protect you. This will protect you.”
He hadn’t wanted it back then. He didn't even want it even now.
He didn’t want something to protect him. Most importantly, he didn’t want to cover his scar. He didn’t want to hide it. He wasn’t ashamed of it. It wasn’t a mark of a victim. It was the mark of a survivor.
So, David had smiled and given the bracelet back.
“I never wanted to be protected,” David had replied. “I only ever wanted to be loved.”
The warlock had smiled at that and given David a hug. It had felt different than other hugs he had experienced since he had come to New York.
It wasn’t just the magic. Magnus Bane carried so much love inside himself you could literally feel it through him.
I'm gonna cry during my programming class (where we're doing variables apparently all of a sudden??)
this is so beautiful
“I wasn’t talking about Bapa,” Max said now. “I was talking about the other one.”
David chuckled at that. “Oh, yeah. He is definitely going to kill you.”
what flowers would you like at your funeral?
so Jackson has family troubles
I've definitely got that
yeah I know what it's like to be jealous of someone else's perfect family
JACKSON WTF
Is he trying to ruin max's relationship with his family???
oh hell no
JACKSON THE AUDACITY
“One stolen necklace, One broken nose and One bruised cheek,” he said. “And you’ve been in London for less than a day.”
kit seriously? but is he wrong though?
“This is what I get for falling for a Lightwood-Bane,” David sighed and walked through the portal.
WELL AT LEAST HE'S SELF AWARE
Jackson...
in some ways, I can empathize with him. my younger self anyway. but Jackson this is not how you do things
There was a moment of silence and then Magnus Bane giggled.
“I do love it when the quiet ones go feral,” the warlock grinned.
MAGNUS
NOT.THE.TIME
(me too)
“David!” Mr Herondale gasped. “Is your hand okay?”
yup that's Jace y'all
David hated violence. He hated fighting – which he was often not allowed to say out loud considering he was a shadowhunter.
But it was the truth. He hated hurting people – or even things. It made him feel sick.
“It’s alright, Chouchou,” Mr Herondale ran a hand through David’s hair. “Next time, just-”
“Use my words?” David asked.
“Just don’t get caught,” the man winked.
and that is why I would never want to be a shadowhunter.
I know saying that doesn't do anything but when I first read tsc I wanted to be a shadowhunter really badly and damn that was some time ago but now...violence of any kind is my biggest trigger idek why. and I hate that so much because what kind of a person gets triggered by loud voices and fighting EVEN ON SCREEN??? I usually just push myself to watch stuff because it's dumb. I refuse to see trigger warnings before reading a book or watching a show because damn it, I should be able to stand those things I'm, not a child. and it may be doing me more harm than good but I shouldn't feel like this in the first place
okay...that was long
ANYWAY
“David, I appreciate you standing up for Max,” the Consul said. “But next time, please try not to punch anyone in the face.”
“Yes, sir,” David nodded. “Because it’s wrong.”
“Because it means more paperwork for me,” the Consul groaned and then straightened up. “But yes. Absolutely. Very wrong. No punching people!”
LMAO ALEC
Jackson...
oh
oh
oh
I was wrong then
He was grinning. Magnus Bane must have raised hell in the shadow market.
that must have been fun
Max was doing that thing where he was not trying to pout but he was mostly definitely pouting. It made David want to kiss him. But then the Consul spoke, and David reminded himself he didn’t want to be the third person to get punched in the face this evening.
well-
“I understand that Jackson has been through a lot. But that’s not an excuse for him to hurt those around him. I learned that lesson the hard way. So, you shouldn’t excuse his behaviour.”
someone's trauma and pain is never an excuse to hurt others
but that doesn't mean we should invalidate their trauma either
“You can stay back and try to help him. I won’t stop you,” the man got up now. “But if he tries to hurt you-”
“You will unleash hell?” David chuckled.
“Worse,” the other man grinned. “I will unleash Lexi.”
that is much much worse
Books brought him comfort in so many ways. Just holding one in his hands automatically made him feel better.
oh my god
he gets it
I always have a book with me when I'm out even if I'm not gonna get the time to read it because just the weight and comfort of it in my hands or in my backpack brings me so much comfort and helps with my social anxiety so much
no one understands when I try to tell them that
you get it...
someone gets it finally
AYYY IRENE
“David, it’s very sweet that you want to protect Jackson,” Kit pointed out. “But literally no one is buying that. Not even Irene.”
The lynx purred on his lap as if she agreed with Kit.
“I could break into a liquor cabinet,” David said a little indignantly.
David is the nicest you can get
David wouldn’t. Apparently, everyone already seemed to know that - even the lynx he had met five minutes ago.
we are solving something in class and it's really quiet because we're all doing our work (I'm reading the fic so-) and this one person had their mic open and they kept on whispering their steps and it was so weird I cant-
BUT YES DAVID IS A CINNAMON ROLL. EVEN THE LYNX KNOWS
“We were talking about shitty fathers,” Jackson pointed out. “You’re welcome to stay.”
“I’m gonna need something stronger than red wine for this conversation,” Kit chuckled.
I remember that bitch
David used to do it when he was a child. He used to pretend his life was a story. He used to pretend everything that happened to him was happening to some other boy – a boy who wasn’t real. A boy who lived inside a book. Because it hurt a little less when you pretend like it wasn’t happening to you.
But the pain was still very real.
OK YOU CAN STOP CALLING ME OUT NOW
“I fucking hate ogres,” he said through gritted teeth.
“Was your father an ogre too?” Jackson asked.
“He was more like a harpy,” Kit snorted. “He was always flying and fleeing. I didn’t know how deep his talons were in my head until it was too late.”
you really like traumatizing all your characters, don't you?
I really fucking hope the ogre got what he deserved
and if the angel is dead then fuck everyone
“I mean, there was that time when Sebastian Morgenstern turned my father into the endarkened, and then he went around killing people. So, I would say he was more like a zombie,” the man was explaining now. “The zombie father tried to kill me but my brother killed him first.”
“Good lord!” Jackson said in shock.
Kit chuckled softly. “Boy do shadowhunters need therapy.”
they really do
He knew about those from New York. He knew Mr Herondale and Miss Fairchild went for one together.
YES GET THEM THERAPY
“Yikes,” Kit chuckled. “I’d prefer something classier. How about London Boys?”
“None of us are from London though,” Tiberius pointed out.
“The Beatles are not actually beetles, Ty,” Kit chuckled. “It’s just for pizazz.”
damn guys
Then the idea of a band turned into a possible YouTube channel where they would react to cute animal videos.
YS DO IT
“When people do awful things, really awful things, at one point we stop being surprised. Like what Valentine did to his children or what our fathers did to us or what those women did to Rafael. We might have been shocked or disgusted. But it wasn’t unrealistic, was it?”
“I guess not,” the boy said.
“Even when they did the most unimaginable acts of cruelty, it somehow managed to fit into our imagination. We accepted that the world can be unrealistically cruel. The kind of cruelty we will never understand. But why isn’t it the same for kindness? Why is that when someone is too kind, we automatically feel uncomfortable? We judge their intensions or think they are just pretending to be nice. We think they are being unrealistic. Why is that?”
we get so used to cruelty that kindness feels weird
“But that’s how our life works, doesn’t it? It’s a giant ball of what ifs and could have beens and if nots. What if my father had loved me instead of hurt me? Could I have been kinder if I was hugged instead of being abused? Would have I been a different person if not for my trauma? Our lives are an endless collection of theories about our real selves. The one didn’t we never had the chance to become.”
THIS
I used to spend a bunch of time on the what-ifs but those are useless. so screw the what-ifs and live in the present
“I guess we’ll never know, Jackson. None of us will never know how we would have turned out if things had been different for us. We never got the chance to be who were meant to be. Instead, we became who we had to become to survive what we went through. We will never know our true selves. We only know the version of us that made it through all the trauma.”
“Christ, that’s depressing,” Jackson said.
“It is,” David nodded. “But we made it through. We survived. I think we should focus on that.”
you survived. that's what matters
“There is nothing wrong with wanting to be rescued,” David smiled.
I wish I had heard this before...
maybe I don't always have to be strong. maybe it's ok sometimes just want to be saved.
I'm so happy that both Jackson and David found each other
David had learned Gaelic. Jackson had learned how to play the piano.
They had laughed and lived and loved and learned.
And they had survived – one day at a time. The London Boys.
they survived.
I know I'm always key smashing and screaming but these words, these lines, all these chapters mean so so much to me.
“You’ll write to me, won’t you?” David asked, hugging Jackson closely.
“No,” Jackson replied. “I will FaceTime you like a normal person, you weirdo!”
David laughed at that. “I prefer letters. They are more emotional.”
“I’ll text you,” Jackson countered. “With emojis.”
oh to have someone write me letters.
I love writing letters
once at the end of a school year, I wrote little letters to everyone in my class anonymously. even the people who had been mean to me. that was like 1-2 years after my transfer to that school and everyone practically hated me but I wanted to do something nice because who knows what someone is going through. I ended up not putting them in people's desks...
I threw them all away :)
but writing letters is superior
I often write my feelings down and give the letter to someone rather than talk to someone
if you receive a letter from me or a custom-made gift...you have reached my ultimate friendship
oh my god. THIS IS HOW I SHOULD TALK TO ONE OF MY FRIENDS ABOUT MY FEELINGS
It's kind of been a mess between us and I want to talk to her but I didn't know how to.
this is why i shouldn't send asks-
JACKSON CATCHING UP ON MAX AND DAVID
“You know what it means,” Jackson grinned harder. “Also, if that wanker tries to break your heart, I will break his face.”
“You know he is the Consul’s son?” David giggled.
“I’ve done it once and I will do it again,” Jackson shrugged. “He better treat you right.”
"wanker"
I HAVE A BRITISH ONLINE FRIEND AND THEY CALLED OUR AMERICAN ONLINE FRIEND A WANKER
AND OUR OTHER BRITISH FRIEND JOINED IN
WHILE ALL THE NON-BRITISH PEOPLE WERE LIKE "huh"
Lexi had cut her hair even shorter. Her girlfriend apparently got something called an undercut.
“Just in case someone dared to assume we were straight,” she had winked at him.
how many years has this fake dating been going on...
CENTURION SELENA
fterA the twins went to bed, David stepped out of the institute and went looking for his heart.
"went looking for his heart"
OH FUCK I FORGOT TO JOIN MY CLASS
MAX STOP DEPLETING YOUR SELF GODDAMN
And then somewhere along the way, Max’s heartbeat had become the steadiest thing in David’s life.
Max, with all his chaos and drama and danger, had become the steadiest thing in David’s life.
oh my god that's a parallel from canon
“Tell me why.”
“Ain't nothing but a heart break!!"
Max-
Max could make fireballs that killed demons on the spot. He could summon things from anywhere. He could heal people with his eyes closed. He was one of the youngest warlocks allowed to visit the spiral labyrinth.
Max was a warlock in every sense. A good one. A great one even.
he is so talented...
Only idiots would underestimate Magnus Bane’s power.
EXACTLY
He is probably going to be Consul like next week.”
David chuckled. “Next week?”
next week????
“Yeah, his smoking habits,” Max rolled his eyes.
Rafael wasn’t the smoker in the family. He knew who it was, but David would never open his mouth. It wasn’t his secret to tell.
this keeps on getting better
“It’s my hair!” David laughed.
“And you’re my David!” Max argued. “I say you are not allowed to grow your hair.”
MY DAVID
MY DAVID
MY DAVID
“I don’t want to downworld-splain it to you.”
Max blinked and then laughed. “You don’t want to what?”
“Downworld-splain,” David mumbled. “It’s when shadowhunters explain downworlders how to be downworlders.”
they were SO close to kissing
I'm gonna get in there and lock them in a closet together and tell them to FUCKING GET WITH IT
Remember who you are. Remember where you stand.
remember who you are. remember where you stand...
I know this is supposed to be about portals.
OH MY GOD THEY KISSED
THEY KISSED
IM SO CLOSE TO SCREAMING CLASS AND EVERYONE OUTSIDE THIS ROOM BE DAMNED
OH MY GOD DAVID FELL
reminds me of when alec fell down the stairs-
OH MY GOD I'M GONNA SCREAM
WE'RE GONNA GET MORE MAVID CONTENT SOON I'M SCREAMING INTERNALLY UYDRVFY7VSDU7UYVFSDUYGCADUYIGJCDSHJKGDVCSUGISDVHVF
ok, I have a computer assignment to get to and tests to study for. BUT I LOVED THIS CHAPTER SO SO MUCH!! THEY FINALLY KISSED I'M SO HAPPY!!!!!
Also I know I tend to go off track and you can totally ignore that. i just go crazy. BYEE
This live blog gives me so much life you don't even know. I am go glad you enjoyed the chapter. I love hearing you rant about it. It's refreshing lol.
And I looooooove the lil anecdotes you share in between. Also wtf is a programming class like nobody wants to learn programme what kind of hetero nonsense I-
FINISH YOUR ASSIGNMENTS AND STUDY FOR YOUR TESTS I'LL SEE YOU SOON :)
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carnocus · 2 years
Text
incorrect quote tag
thankkk youuu @euphoniouspandemonium for the tag!!!! im v excited to do this tag.
doing this for the promethean society:
-
Micah: Do you know that we are made out of atoms?
Micah: And atoms never touch each other.
Micah: So in my defense, officer. I did not punch this kid.
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Ginger: Welcome to my very first vlog, in which I try different hair products! Ginger: *sprays hairspray in their mouth* Ginger: Well, right off the bat I can tell you this one is not very good.
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Micah and Lys's relationship in the first half of tps:
Lysander: Micah, I sense hostility. Micah: Good, because I hate you.
vs
Micah and Lys's relationship in the second half
Micah: Hey, I’m getting in the shower. Wanna help me out? Lysander: ...Have you never taken a shower before?
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Quinn, holding an antique bottle: Is this whiskey or perfume? Micah: *grabs and chugs the entire bottle* Micah: Micah: It's perfume.
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Micah: I’ve invited you here because I crave the deadliest game... Lysander, nodding: Knife Monopoly. Micah: I was actually going to play Russian roulette, but now I'm really interested in whatever knife Monopoly is.
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Colette: What’s your favorite color? Elliot: Stop asking stupid questions. Ask me something logical and mature. Colette: How many moles of sodium bicarbonate are needed to neutralize 0.8ml of sulfuric acid at STP? Elliot: My favorite color is pink.
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Ezra: Now, the recipe calls for 2 shots of vodka. Ezra: *upends the bottle*
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Ezra: If I say I love you, will you say it back? Colette: Yes. Ezra: I love you. Colette: It back. *Later* Elliot: Why is Ezra crying face-down on the floor?
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Ezra: Am I going to far? Quinn: No, no, no. You went too far about 7 hours ago. Now you’re going to prison.
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Colette: *holding a salt packet* It’s just a little sodium chloride. Charmine: Actually Colette, it’s salt. Colette: That’s what I said, sodium chloride. Charmine: Uh Colette, that would be salt. Charmine: *takes salt packer from Colette* This is iodized table salt, which in addition to sodium chloride contains anti-caking agents and potassium iodate, which is added to prevent iodine deficiency. So not only are you being overly pretentious by insisting on using scientific terminology for everyday items, you are factually wrong. Your arrogance is your downfall, you annoying little shit.
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Charmine: All the sudden I got a random burst of energy, and I think it's my body's last hurrah before it completely shuts down.
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Ezra: Do you know a turtles only weakness? Quinn: No... well, their slowness. Ezra: Their weaknesss is they can't roll over when they are on their backs. Ezra: Now I have a plan. Ezra: If I duct tape two turtles together, they'll be unstoppable.
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Elliot: Colette has only knocked me out three time this week. Our friendship is really developing.
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Quinn: Plants are basically the ideal friends. They are quiet, friendly, and easy to please. All they need is a little water and fresh earth, and they are perfectly happy to lie there all day in the sun. And they don’t make increasingly awful life choices, or hide their relationships. They have never, as far as I know, fucked a bee.
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*Everyone is giving advice to Colette* Charmine: It's okay to ask for help. Lysander: You're not a burden. Ezra: Murder is okay. Quinn: Your feelings matter.
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Ezra: I’m quick at math. Quinn: Ok, what’s 38 times 76? Ezra: 24. Quinn: That wasn’t even close. Ezra: But it was quick.
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Quinn: How are you today? Charmine: Please don’t make me think about my life.
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Ginger: I'm bored. Micah: Wanna commit first degree murder? Ginger: Sure! Charmine, hearing them: No- Stop, don't do that! Put that knife down! Put Elliot down!!
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Charmine: I only have two emotions: exhaustion and stress. And I’m somehow always feeling both simultaneously.
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Ginger: Why does my arm shake and turn bright red when I’m eating dirt? Colette: Colette: Why are you eating dirt? Ginger: Did I ask you if I should eat dirt? No, so answer my question.
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Everyone: GET BACK HERE YOU DUMB FUCK! Elliot: LET ME RUN FROM THE CONSEQUENCES OF MY ACTIONS!
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Micah: Someone take me to art museums and make out with me. Lysander: But they said not to touch the masterpieces. Micah: Well somebody's got to pin the artwork to the wall. Quinn, on a walkie talkie: This is Quinn, those idiots are fucking around in the East wing again.
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Ginger: What's that? Quinn: Chocolate. Ginger: What's chocolate? Quinn: Candy. Do they not have candy where you're from? Ginger: Yeah. Grapes, nuts. Quinn: No wonder you're so bitter.
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Ezra: Life keeps fucking me and I can't remember the safeword.
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Colette: *angrily presses Ezra against a wall* WHERE'S THE MONEY?! Ezra: ... Ezra: Are we about to kiss-
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Charmine: Who's in charge here? Colette, shrugging: Usually whoever yells the loudest.
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Ginger: I know what a prism is! It's where you put bad people.
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Ezra: So, she kissed me. Quinn: And you kissed her back? Ezra: No, I kissed her mouth.
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Colette: Charmine, we're hungry! Ezra: Charmine! What's for dinner? Ginger: We're hungry, Charmine! Charmine, frying a bottle of ketchup over the stove: *screams*
-
so, what have we learned? they r all mentally unstable, but especially ginger, ezra, and micah (the fucking chaos trio), charmine is the depressed mom friend, lysander is a himbo, and the enemies-to-lovers fans will love this one. also one of these characters is dead for most of tps, so some of these are very 'what if they actually met' and it made me sad.
tagging @isherwoodj and @47crayons with an open tag for everyone else!
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rainforestseed · 4 years
Text
um. i spent far too long on a post abowt jj being neurodiverse.
warning~ ableism ~ableist words mentioned~brief mentions of child abuse and violence...idk  .  this is just what i thunk n i wanna share. i ve been waiting for someone to talk about this so im just gonna go for it  .. im gonna  put it under  read cause its a bit long 
the scene before midsummers, with jj in his room freaking owt ~ he’s having a sensory meltdown. jj is trapped in this scene. he wouldn’t have been allowed to leave in his situation, luke wouldve likely hurt him again if he tried so locking himself in his bedroom was his safest option. But on top of his face likely throbbing with pain and feeling very scared, there was music playing loudly from downstairs and luke screaming over top of it. JJ was responding the same as i do when i have meltdowns from sensory overloads. Pacing, growling, panicking, screaming, pushing his hands into his ears to reduce sensory input while rubbing  pressure into the back of his head, throwing things, kicking, self injurious behaviour.
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i do all of these things during a meltdown. I often also spin, convulse, press into my eye sockets, punch my self in the face and throw my head against walls. I have no control over it and this scene hit close to home. JJ’s not only angry and hurt and scared here. he is completely unable to sort through and process his sensory input and the intensity of his feelings and emotions. Afterwards when he is leaving his bedroom luke is passed owt on the couch which shows quite a bit of time has passed and it’s quiet. JJ is still hunched over in his room recovering, crying, hypersensitive, exhausted and terrified.
i’ve seen a lot of descriptions of jj being short fuzed, ill tempered, hot headed,   reckless, aggressive, impulsive, volatile. He’s also called ableist words like idiot, crazy,  psycho, maniac, dumbass by all the characters. baby blue is just neurodivergent. he experiences feelings and emotions and sensations a lot differently from his friends, which is why he is often misunderstood and his thoughts and ideas and emotions are sometimes dismissed.
JJ had trouble reading the compass in episode 2. When he reads it he says “Reddle - Rout. No i think that’s an A” When Kie reads redfield without a beat JJ frowns a lil bit and just says “right” Rudy is dyslexic so mayhaps there is a connection :‐)
JJ becomes visibly distressed to loud sudden sounds, and when people raise their voice at or around him he doesn’t like it. When jjs friends are arguing around him he becomes incredibly distressed, like pacing..unable to look at what’s happening, grinding his teeth distressed. JJs friends are the only stability he has. So when there is tension between any of them or any threat to his family becoming less stable or falling apart or changing, he doesn’t like it. The panic and fear from sudden loud sounds might have to do with ptsd from being a victim of child abuse as well from having to watch his n his friends backs from getting hurt by kooks growing up .
 JJ tactile stims. non stop.  my stimming is different from jjs but also similar, im gonna try my best to understand his.
JJs rarely able to sit still and continuously seeks touch of some kind. He uses self stimulatory behaviours that help him focus when he’s thinking n listening and when he’s talking and to regulate his emotions when he’s feeling them intensely. JJ is the most physically affectionate character by far. He likes touching things and touching his friends.
JJ always has something in his hands. Usually his lighter, he plays with it, almost constantly, in a lot of different ways. Sometimes he flicks it open and closed, rolls it between his fingers, most of the time he’s just holding it maybe for the weight of it and the texture and temperature of the metal
When he doesn’t have anything to touch he shoves his hands inside his pockets and chews the inside of his mouth a lot and grinds his teeth together. I think he was chewing his nails in the hammock
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He stims by bouncing his knees repetitively and by taking his hat off to run his fingers along n avert his gaze when he’s anxious . 
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he plays with knives and hacky sacks, stones and sticks, touches his rings, even holding his gun could be a thing. 99 percent of time jj has his gun he is just holding it and stroking it lol    
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everyone stims. but yeh jj also experiences sensory overloads, meltdowns, has difficulty with reading, impulsive behaviour, n emotional dysregulation whilst stimming constantly for an entire season 
i wanna talk abowt this for a minute. cuz i always have this weird feeling when i relate to a character n end up  loving them n then i think i  put my stuff on them...like ahh yes i am this so they are this too. symptoms of neurodevelopmental disorders like asd, adhd, sensory processing disorder and dyslexia can overlap. this ocean angel is neurodiverse and it makes me feel incredibly ~h a p p y!~   Also makes sense why he relies on weed more than any of his friends. other than him just knowing it works for him n makes him feel better, it’s probable he isn’t quite aware of the extent he is self medicating his negative symptoms.
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supergirl-writingz · 4 years
Text
Kidnapped Part 2
B!D deals with recovery.
Note: the doctor being named dr grey isnt actually like mer or lexie i literally just watch too much greys and couldnt think of another name haha also THANK U FOR BEING SO PATIENT W ME im really proud of this fic tbh and i hope u guys like it:) remember requests are always open
Warning: trauma, anxiety, therapy
It’s been about one week since you were rescued. You were doing okay. Everyone was trying to convince you to see someone, to talk about what you went through. You didn’t get why. You realized you have been through something tragic, but wouldn’t it be easier to just put it in the past? 
Physically, you still had a long way to go. You were still cooped up at the DEO and you would be for a little bit longer. You had bruises everywhere, 2 broken ribs, a concussion, and a broken bone in your foot. But Lena assured you that you were healing properly. You trusted her.
Your least favorite part about everything, was the way people were treating you. They treated you as if you were glass, and if they spoke to loud or even held your hand, they would break you. You didn’t feel broken and you didn’t get why everyone wanted you to be. Lena was the only one who would tell you things how they were, straightforward with no holding back. You appreciated it. 
Lena walked into the room, “Hey hun can we talk?”
You nodded, “Of course Lena what’s up?”
Lena sat at the edge of your bed, “Darling I think you need to see someone, you-”
“Not you too” you interrupted rolling your eyes, “I’m fine, I don’t need to see anyone”
Lena was patient with you, with a calm voice she said, “Y/N you can’t keep bottling up your emotions, it’s not healthy. If you don’t let this out you’re gonna have a breakdown. You’re not fine and thats okay.”
“I am fine” you snapped at her.
“Y/N, you are scared to sleep without sedatives and you haven’t talked about what happened to you at all. Let me help you, please talk to me, or Kara or Alex or a specialist. Please”
You turned your head away from her. You were embarrassed but it was true, you were scared of going to bed without them.
“Don’t sedate me tonight, I’ll sleep just fine”
Lena sighed, “Okay”
As she walked out she turned around and said, “You know we’re all just trying to do what’s best for you right?”
You didn’t answer. Lena walked out looking sad and defeated. You felt bad, she’s helped you so much. But you were tired of people saying you weren’t okay. You thought about sleeping tonight without the sedatives, truthfully you were nervous but you didn’t tell anyone. Tonight was Kara’s turn to sleep in your room, and she always made you feel safe. 
Later that night, around 11, you finally fell asleep after tossing and turning for a couple hours. 
All of the sudden you woke up with a start not knowing where you were. You were screaming and your heart rate was through the roof. Kara instantly got up and rushed to you.
“Y/N baby it’s just a dream! You’re okay!” she said calmly but loud enough so it would get through to you.
It didn’t help. You were starting to hyperventilate. Kara put her face directly in front of yours.
“Look at my sweetheart, breathe like I do” Kara said, breathing in and out slowly for me to follow.
You looked Kara in the eyes and started following her breathing. 5 minutes later you were breathing normally. Lena and Alex came rushing in, someone must have called them.
“Baby what happened?” Alex asked with a concerned tone. 
Tears were building up in your eyes, “I- I was back there.. in my dream”.
“The room where it all happened?” Lena asked. You nodded, tears starting to come quicker
“It was so real, I could feel every punch, every kick. It was like I was back there.” you said, at this point you were sobbing. 
Alex came close to you and put her hand to your cheek, “You’re safe now Y/N, he can’t hurt you anymore”
You pulled Alex closer and cried into the crook of her neck. While Kara was strong and comforting, there was something about Alex that made you feel powerful and in control. She was such a good directer at the DEO, even if things in her life were bad. Even when everything was going wrong, she had control. You needed that. You needed to be in control of your emotions, but you didn’t know how. You realized now everyone was right, you weren’t okay. But you still didn’t like the idea of seeing a therapist of any kind. You just couldn’t imagine talking to a complete stranger about things you can’t talk about to the people closest to you. 
You started to calm down and stopped crying. You looked up at Lena.
“I’m so sorry Lena”, you said.
“Darling you have nothing to be sorry for” she replied softly.
“I was so rude to you, you were just trying to help” you replied guiltily.
“You’re struggling little one, whether you know it or not, and there is absolutely nothing wrong with that. After what you’ve been through, we’d be more concerned if you weren’t struggling” Kara said.
“We just want you to feel better and we want you to know you have our constant support” Alex said.
You looked down and smiled softly. You didn’t know what you would do without these people. You didn’t think therapy was for you, but it seems like it would make them feel better, and who knows maybe it would make you feel better too. 
“I’ll see someone”, you said quietly, “if you guys really think it will be good”
Alex smiled and said, “We’re only asking that you try”. 
You got in a couple more hours of sleep before day time had come and it was too bright to sleep. You heard a knock at the door and looked up to see Lena and another woman you didn’t recognize. 
“Hey hun, this is Dr. Grey, she works with people who have been through trauma” Lena said, trying not to overwhelm you.
She smiled a bright smile and said, “Hi, it’s nice to meet you”
You took a breath and remembered how you told Lena and your sisters you would give it a try. 
You reached out your hand and said “Hi, I’m Y/N. It’s nice to meet you too”
Dr. Grey shook your hand then told you that Lena or your sisters could stay in the room, or it could be just them. You decided to give it a try alone with Dr. Grey. Lena understood and wished you good luck before leaving. You took a deep breath, talking to this stranger was making you feel anxious. You and Dr. Grey started talking, and quickly you felt more comfortable. You guys didn’t talk much about the kidnapping, she mostly just wanted to know your home and social life. You told her pretty much everything, from your sisters, your friends, Lena, and school. Dr. Grey was pretty easy to talk to. The only time the kidnapping did come up was when she suggested that you talk to your sisters or Lena about what happened. She said if it was out in the open, you might feel better. She made it very clear though that you should wait until you were ready. And just like that, your hour session was over before you knew it.
“Thank you Dr. Grey” you said.
She smiled warmly, “So we’ll be meeting again?”
You returned her smile and nodded. 
About 2 weeks later, you were sitting in your bed at the DEO. You have been seeing Dr. Grey daily and it was helping a lot. All of the sudden Kara walked in and you smiled at her asked her to bring Alex and Lena into the room. Kara smiled and nodded, walking out of the room to get them. A few moments later, the three women walked in. 
“So Dr. Grey thought that I should talk to at least someone about what happened, other than her. And I trust you guys more than anyone, so I want to tell you guys” you say, starting to feel a little anxious.
“That’s very sweet darling but we don’t wanna push you into talking about something you’re not ready to talk about” Lena said concerned.
You smiled, “I’m ready”, and they nodded.
You told them everything, from you walking home from school, to the guy grabbing you, to your surroundings, and on and on. You told them how they wanted to know who Supergirl was, and you shot Kara a warm look almost saying, ‘This isn’t your fault’. Kara gave you a small yet guilty smile. You took a deep breath as you started to talk about the torture. Your hands were shaking so Alex grabbed them into hers. You didn’t even realize you were crying until Kara wiped a tear from your cheek. You told them everything... you told them the beatings, about the whips and taser. You told them about the hunger, and how cold it was. You told them how you were so hopped up on drugs, you couldn’t even remember how you got there. 
“The scariest part was when I lost hope, I truly thought I was gonna die there” you said. You finally looked up at them, Kara was crying just as much as you were. Lena and Alex had some tears too, but you could tell they were trying to be strong. You grabbed Kara’s hands and looked her in the eyes.
“But you saved me Kara, you’re the reason I’m still here” you said softly.
Kara pulled you into a hug and you felt her warmth and comfort, which then turned into pain from your ribs.
“Kara.. too tight” you said chuckling.
“Sorry” she laughed immediately letting go. The four of you sat there in silence for a while, enjoying each others company. Dr. Grey was right, you did feel better putting it all out there. 
A few weeks later, you were making great progress. You were still having nightmares, but not every night. The anxiety meds you were taking were starting to help with the panic attacks too. You were still at the DEO, but you were starting to walk around though, with a boot and crutches. Your ribs were almost healed and your concussion was all gone. 
You were doing great with Dr. Grey too. The only thing she was concerned with was that you didn’t want to leave the DEO. Of course you wanted to be at home, but you couldn’t get yourself to step out of the building. You felt safe in there. You had this fear that the man who took you would be out there, even though you knew he was in custody. Everyone tried to get you just to go on a simple walk outside, but your anxiety would kick in before you even got the chance. Today was going to be different, today you were determined to go outside. You haven’t been outside since Kara flew you to the DEO the day of the kidnapping, and you were barely conscious.. but today was different. 
You asked Kara, Alex, and Lena if you could all go on a walk. They gave a little surprised look but didn't say anything, they probably didn’t want you to overthink it, but they realized how big of a deal this was. You guys were having a normal conversation, walking through the DEO. You stopped when you reached the exit. You felt Kara give your hand a little squeeze, letting you know that it’s okay. You took a deep breath, opened the door, and walked outside. 
You were surprised as you felt the fresh air in your lungs. Everything looked greener than you remember. You spent so much time in the DEO, that you forgot there was life outside of the grey and dark building. You looked around at all the people, talking and laughing, and you were amazed at how good it felt. You quickly started to cry and turned back to your sisters and Lena.
“Oh baby why are you crying?” Alex asked softly, “Do you wanna go back inside?”
These were happy tears. 
“I’m finally free from him” you said smiling, wiping the tears from your face. 
They all smiled at you and were so proud of your strength and perseverance. You had a lot to work through still, but this was a break through. This was the first time since the kidnapping, that you were 100% sure that you would make it through this. You pulled them into group hug, silently thanking them for never leaving your side.
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the-holy-ghosted · 3 years
Text
He is Alone
Breekon tries to think about the events leading up to him sobbing in a delivery van on the side of the highway
hi im transferring my ao3 fics onto tumblr!! this was my first one that i wrote a long while ago, enjoy
Breekon tries to think about the events leading up to him sobbing in a delivery van on the side of the highway.
It's not flattering, the way he's acting. A stuffed up and runny nose congesting the choked sobs and sharp wails that come out of him unpermitted. He cries pathetically into his hands, covering his face and soaked with unending tears. It hurts, the place where he thinks his heart once was. It aches horribly. His wet hands and tears shield his vision from the slow-rolling fog beginning to surround the van outside, as well as the steadily lowering temperature. His head hurts, but he tries to think about how he got here. He was driving... driving away. What was he driving from? He ponders, unsuccessfully wiping away tears. The museum... he was driving away from the wax museum. As he was driving, he was overcome with the sudden realization that he was alone. Before he could even process the feeling, it overtook him, and his eyes were glassy and he couldn't see correctly. His shoulders shook and he let out the first of many, many sobs as he slowed down and stopped off the side of the road. That's how he got there.
It was shocking, how quickly the emotions came on. Normally he was good at suppressing feelings, for the times he did feel any. But he was broken, now. So, brutally broken inside and all the thoughts he was trying to push back came flowing full force to the front of his mind.
Breekon realized he was alone. Being alone released the waterworks; such a simple thing to crush a man so hard. But as he stopped the van, he realized how truly alone he was. It was the first time he had been fully emersed in solitude. He had spent the past few hours surrounded by police and firemen, sitting in the aftermath of an explosion. Only now, driving to nowhere at 2:34 in the morning did he truly feel the silence. There was no sound of another person breathing. No sensation of someone else's presence. There was no static-y voice in his head saying things that only he could hear. There was nothing. He never had nothing before.
The solitude was painful. Breekon was all by himself for the first time in centuries. He had nothing anymore. No companionship, no deliveries, no comfort. Nothing but a blood-splattered coffin sitting in the back of the van, silent and satisfied. No longer hungry, at the sacrifice of one of its handlers. It had hardly been the last thing on Breekon's mind, had it not been hauled back to him by some police officer. He didn't consider the coffin, then. The only thing on his mind was his companion's body limp in his arms.
Breekon allows himself to think about Hope. He thinks about the sensation of holding him, lifeless and cold. He wails and cries harder remembering the immediate horror that struck his face as hid throat ripped open by surprise. Neither of them expected it. He thought about the feeling of heavy weight that washed over him the very moment Hope had died, followed by the rush of unbridled rage as he threw that damned officer into the buried. He remembered feeling breathless, slumped over the coffin lid, enraged and disoriented and heaving heavily. It was so hard to turn around and look at Hope's face, stuck horrified and in pain. It hurt Breekon, too, emotionally and physically. He dragged himself over. Breekon remembers holding his face, telling him look at me, Hope, please just look at me, Hope look, please, only to receive no answer. He remembers closing his gaping mouth and dragging a shaking hand over his eyes, closing them permanently. He had begun to cry, then. Not strong and agonizing just yet, only small sobs and sniffles. He remembered the rumbling, but he does not remember the explosion. He recalls nothing after curling himself around Hope to protect his lifeless body.
Breekon's memory becomes fuzzy after the explosion. The steam organs joyful tune halted abruptly and gave way to screams of agony. His ears rang sharply, and the museum crumbled around him. Large slabs of concrete and stone hit him hard, the wind blowing his hat off and throwing debris in his face. It hurt him. But he did not move, and he did not let go of Hope. He does not recall how long he kneeled under the rubble, nor it being pulled away from him by firemen. He does, however, remember snarling at the paramedics trying to pry him away. They asked if he was alright, touched his shoulder, but he did not notice them. He only snapped out of his daze when they reached to pull Hope out of his arms. Breekon snapped at the paramedics, told them not to touch him. He wouldn't have let go, had his attention not been brought to the coffin. They asked if it was his, and he said yes. They did not question why, they just let him have it. The paramedics tried to console him, to tell him it's alright and he could let go now. He had no energy to argue. He let go of Hope, but not without taking something. Remembering where he put it, Breekon pulls out the gold ring that was once on Hope's finger. He turns it in his hands, observing it. He looks at the engraving on the inside: a small heart carved by hand. Breekon remembers it being his idea, just a secret little thing. Personal, only for them to know. It was... cheesy, perhaps... but he didn't care. It was special. He is too focused on the ring to notice the fog rolling in thicker, nor the lack of noise from the road.
The ring makes Breekon think of their purpose together. They'd always relished in making people afraid, looming over them, watching them become more and more unnerved in their presence. His favorite thing, though, was when people would notice the rings. They would glance down and the discomfort in their expressions would turn to confusion. Sometimes, if they really wanted to get it across, they would subtly intertwine their pinkies and wait for whoever it was they were with to notice. They'd look, momentarily considering that can't be right, really? and shake their head in surprise. They'd turn away, then, perplexed and a little unnerved, and Breekon and Hope would smile and their fingers would intertwine. It was amusing, scaring and confusing all they came across. It was their purpose, and they loved it. They loved each other.
And now look at where they are.
Breekon stops himself, not wanting to think about that just yet. He rests his forehead on the steering wheel and wraps his arms around himself, noticing the cold air for the first time. He ignores it and tries to think of another happy memory. He skims through his three century-long catalog of memories and finds himself thinking about Hope's laughter. It was the most beautiful sound, he thought. His darling Hope would laugh at almost anything, and it was delightful to hear him even snicker and the slightest remark. Breekon was usually quiet if Hope wouldn't say something first. He wouldn't come off as one for jokes to most people. But privately, in their own company, he would make a little comment or crack a joke that would make Hope cackle. He never joked much around anyone else. His remarks and and silly thoughts were saved only for Hope. Breekon would make him laugh on purpose, occasionally, just to feel it's contagion. Hope would laugh, and then Breekon would laugh, and they'd be laughing at nothing together for a while. Hope's giggles and snickers were a drug. It was beautiful. Everything about Hope was beautiful, though. His laughter, as well as his regular speaking voice. Low and nearly a growl. It would give Breekon shivers to hear him speak in close quarters, quietly and only to him. His teeth were sharp and animalistic, a grinning threat to those they encountered. Breekons special favorite thing about Hope we're his eyes, dark and looming, never changing no matter whose face he wore. They were cold. Emotionless. But to Breekon? They were wonderful. Filled with so much tenderness when they were alone together, a tenderness meant only for him. Hope's eyes would peer into him, peer deep into his soul, and he would let them.
He pondered a moment about that. About how they were so warm to one another. They were soulmates, in the most literal, mortal way it could be thought of. They thought as one. They spoke as one. They were whole together.
And now they were half. He remembers they are half now, and his smile turns into a grimace, and he sobs once more. The twinge at the pit of his stomach returns, and he curls in on himself in agony. Breekon forgets the momentary bliss he felt just seconds ago and swears violently to the empty space next to him. He swears at Nikola, for attempting a ritual at all. He swears at the cop, for ripping apart the love of his life. He swears at the coffin, for being so greedy and heartless. He swears at himself, for not acting fast enough to save the only thing he had in this world. He screams and he screams and there is nothing there to hear him. There is nothing anywhere but a heavy, cold fog that swallows the van outside.
Breekon wallows for a long time. He does not know how long. His throat hurts from yelling and his eyes burn from crying. He is alone, and he always will be.
Then suddenly... There is a car horn. It is loud, and it startles Breekon out of his miserable state. He forgot where he was, he was sitting on the side of the road. He was driving away from the wax museum. He realized he was alone. The time on the dashboard says 2:35 AM. He was sitting for a minute. A full minute that felt like hours. He stares at the headlights passing next to him, and realizes he shouldn't be parked on the side of the road.
Breekon puts the thoughts of loneliness and Hope and loss aside. He does not wish to spiral any further. He wipes the remaining tears away from his eyes and sniffles. He is alone, and from now on he always will be. Breekon does not think any more of the events that led him here, and he turns off the side of the highway.
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loniereads · 3 years
Text
cr: Sufficiently Advanced Magic
*spoiler warning*
Chapter 1 - 5
Chapter one
“I was prepared in a thousand different ways that didn’t matter” - Me for every test I’ve ever taken ☺️✨✨
Omg is he gonna go look for his brother 🥺 This book said found family but make it literal - side note, love the name Tristan.
I hope it’s explained as to WHY hundreds of 17 year olds are enduring a judgment to their possible death????
Imagine you’re brother going basically missing, your mom leaving, and then your dad pulling you out of school so you can prepare to possibly ✨die✨
“It could take years to grow strong enough-” 🥺 He’s going to sacrifice years of his life and risk certain death just for a chance to reunite his family is this book gonna make me cry?
I don’t like his name as much as I like his brothers but yanno whatever- how do you even say Corin
I already hate the dad??? Hello? Your first son is gone and your second could follow in his fate and you don’t even see him off?? Fuck you buddy why are book dads such assholes
“I loathed hurting people. I always had.” so i have decided that if anything happens to Corin I will kill everyone in the room and then myself. WHAT A CUTIE SWEET SOUL
If this book forces him to hurt someone I’ll riot-
Oh my gosh he hates fighting but he’s willing to fight for his brother I LOVE HEALTHY BROTHER RELATIONSHIPS they’re so pure
Corin is so nice to try to explain all of this weapon stuff and rune stuff to me like I have any idea wtf he’s talking about- he’s talking and I’m like I’m just happy to be here ☺️
I feel like the fact that he’s paying for everything he takes is important- like maybe other people just take and don’t leave anything? But he’s like here’s a coin for you scary tower~
“It was too cute to die” why do I love Corin so
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What a cute ass sweet ass cinnamon roll, my god🥺
HE FELT GUILTY FOR KILLING A SHADOW SNDKDNSK I love him sm what a king
Chapter two
Why does everything he say sound so intelligent
ldmoaha not Corin having a convo with a book
It’s been too long since I read a normal romance book why did my brain just decide to ship Corin and a BOOK
Ok but him taking time to ask about his brother has me so soft
What the flip chapter 2 was so short??? ):
Chapter three
“You shouldn’t have done that” how ominous and amazing and I love it
He so casually was like OH LOOK A DEAD BODY OH LOOKIE PEOPLE
Omg is he gonna find his brother in here- OH MY
OMG HE DID AHHHHH
just... kidding. He did infact not find him.
Oh wait someone younger than him though- so is going into the tower a choice? That would make it a little better. Like you decide when you go in or? I NEED MORE INFO PLS
The word resh is growing on me
He risked his gold key on her 🥺
I love this little merry band of criminals- also just hoping the kid doesn’t yanno....die
omg Keras is out here crushing stones with his bare hands 😏 hellooooo
Wait I’m so conflicted??? I want to trust Keras and Vera but I also want to trust the book alsnsish
Vera is a whole mood I really hope she’s not like evil or just a weird thing in the tower or idk whatever I want her to stay
AWWAIT ☹️☹️☹️ They left Keras behind- that can’t be it. He’s gotta come back right? Like book person is gonna save him? Right!!??
Chapter four
VERA SUCH A BADDDDIE
This ‘kid’ they’re carrying is just making out like a bandit, he’s just getting carried through the tower 😂
WOW FUCK YOU VERA??? UH I HOPE SOMETHING KILLS HER-but not rhe kid 😔
Okay this might be a weird jump- but WHAT IF THE BOOK ENTITY ISSSSS HIS BROTHER??????????? Like the book person seems to really care if Corin lives? so it’s either just like a really caring person, OR HIS BROTHER
Pls let me be right
That would be so cool
The book entity helped him to finish the rest completely? Is this allowed? This feels not allowed
Corin: fighting monsters with criminals in a magical tower, very time sensitive needs to escape quickly
Also Corin: lemme just wrote a little diary entry ✨☺️
So obviously he’s going to get to keep his memories
Also like he got out of the tower so easily? What?
“And don’t let anyone hassle you about your attunement.” HOW VERY OMONIOUS OF YOU TO SAY
Honestly- Fuck Magnus Cadence
REPLACEMENT? What?
His childhood bestfriend is his half sister? I love that???? Instead of making them love interests they’re half siblings that’s cool as hell. We love childhood friends to siblings trope
I will reiterate, FUCK MAGNUS CADENCE
I hope we get to see their friendship bc I’m here for this trope
Chapter five
🥺 he sent the boys glove to his parents I’m so soft
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Their relationship makes me so happy?? Like I love this. So they better reunite or I’ll riot
BROTHERLY RELATIONSHIPS ARE THE BESTTT
I miss Keras 🥺
I am so unsure of Sera. I do love the sudden sibling, and I really really hope they end up having a cool relationship and like she helps him find his(their) brother and hdjsjdjs
If anyone gives Corin a hard time for his attunement I’ll throw hands-
Not them earning points at their schools- All I can think about how is “10 points to gryffindor”
I love the word behooves
Can they go back into the tower already 💀 This down time is killing me. I want book entity, Keras and that boy who was unconscious the entire time back.
-side note, I absolutely love how all three of them(Keras, Corin, and Vera) were all so concerned with this unconscious boy and they literally carried him to complete safety. Who is this boy?? Will he come back? I miss him he better not be be dead. Vera can die but not unconscious boy.
I don’t know if I’m supposed to like Sera... but she’s giving me “I’m better than you because I have a better attunement” vibes and I do not like that at all so if Icneed to I will pretend to doesn’t exist.
Aw the schools has like animal representatives decisions?? CUTE UM. - there’s way too many for my brain to keep up with but I love them anyway
Not them assigning kids to basically play pranks on everyone else and tell them if they don’t find the prankster kids they lose points- what a weird ass school
“You and Patrick were practically brothers” GIRL YOU CANT SAY THINGS LIKE THAT TO SOMEONE WHO HAS AN ACTUAL BROTHER WHO IS MISSING AND/OR DEAD
-Also I know Tristen isn’t dead because like then what would be the point huh? HUH? So he’s got to be alive
Or I’ll riot.
“A walking rainstorm” idk why but that is so fucking adorable. I love my new comfort raintorm, Corin.
I can’t wait for them(Corin and Sera) to meet up with their friends and they have to explain that they’re now half siblings.
Them reminding him to not lose his little sigil pin makes me feel like he’s going to lose or forget it ummmm
Imagine getting fucking EXPELLED because you forgot your pin on your other uniform.
I feel like that would be me honestly. Are people not just...forgetful in this universe??
Ngl i would hate to be in the tortoise division
Corins attunement is lamer but his division is called the Phoenix? Like that’s so much cooler than tortoise
The fact that sera is trying to convince me the Spider division isn’t real makes me feel like she’s in it???
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I know my babey Corin didn’t mean this as snarky as I would have liked him to but I love this line so much.
SARCASTIC BOYS WITH DADDY ISSUES OWN ME AND IM NOT ASHAMED TO ADMIT IT
Ngl I was hoping they would have roommates- I love a good school roommate dynamic
For the third time I would like to make my opinion to be known; FUCK MAGNUS CADENCE
Why has no one made a playlist for this book on Spotify? I am throughly disappointed
Not Corin being ghosted by his book-
I wish I had half the motivation Corin has? Like it’s my boys first day of school and as soon as he gets into his room he starts studying. I would have taken a nap
Oop jk as soon as he couldn’t find the rune he was looking for he went to lay in bed.
I’m sorry what in the hell is Wyddsday??? Did I miss them explaining to hat this universe has different names for it’s days of the week?? How am I supposed to know when this is Corin? Or what day it even is currently
World building is so intricate and interesting and I absolutely live for it- but it’s literally so frustrating sometimes learning and remembering everything
Okay Sera being less irritated about her studies being interrupted because it’s Corin is cute
Fuck
I still don’t know if I’m supposed to like Sera
Tashday, Fersday, Kyrsday, Tensday, Vasday, and Wyddsday- either I can’t count or they’re missing a day. And what order do they go in? I need a calendar insert pls and thanks
Wait wait did he just run into an ex? What is this sndlsnsin “long-buried emotions”??
Oooo we get a name. Cecily Lambert
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I didn’t possibly think I could relate to Corin anymore than I already do but here I am
The dorm chiefs introduce themselves to everyone? How cute and Curtis didn’t seem at all annoyed by Corin asking so many questions I love when upperclassman in books aren’t rude for no reason. It’s such a tiring trait they often have smh
I need his exams to hurry up because I would very much like to get back to the fast paced tower scenes-
I know absolutely nothing about Jin but I love him immensely
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dangan-happy · 3 years
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[Having no self-control makes you a tough galoot, like me!] anyone is ok with me i just need someone to talk to recently i was declined getting into online schooling and this is going to really fuck me over mentally and probably in my work too. i cant handle doing mindless work for 7 hours in silence. my brain cant handle it i'm going to get everything done in time and then im going to be held back, and then im going to have to do all this work all over again [1/2]
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Hey, hey, everything’s going to be okay, anon, all right? I’m not just bluffing or anything here; I mean it. I’m here for you now, and hey, you can cry around me, if you need to. I don’t mind; it’s better to cry it all out than to bottle it all up anyway.
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I can understand why you would hate getting rejected for online schooling; you know yourself better than anyone else, and you know that seven to eight hours of silence doesn’t sit well with you at all. I don’t exactly understand why they would not give you access to online schooling, especially considering the current circumstances of the world right now, but regardless, you are going to be okay. And I mean it. This sudden moment of despair may be rough, but I’ll cut through that despair, no matter what it takes! I have true hope in you, I have hope that you will get through this, and I always will! No matter what happens next, you’re going to be okay; you’re going to get through this; you’re still going to be worth it throughout all of this. I can tell that you care about your academics and that you take those type of things seriously in general, so I’m not too worried about that part of it. Even so, I would suggest talking to your mom or dad once you’ve calmed down enough, since I feel this is something that should be talked about with someone else close to you. I can tell that this weight is really, well, weighing down on you. I only want what would help you, and confiding in someone about this will hopefully lessen some of that weight.
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I will continue to cheer you on and support you with as much hope as you may need. But before I go, I’ll say it once more: You will be okay, anon, and you’ll still be worth it. You really will be, I promise.
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~
Hajime said it best, as always, but I am here as well! Things will be alright, anonymous. I am sure of it. I sincerely apologise for your recent rejection into online schooling, and as Hajime said, it's interesting that they wouldn't let you in. With the current state of the earth, online schooling is the safest method for education! It irks me that they did not accept you, dear.
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This sudden pain from the rejection will pass in dear time, anonymous. I am sure of that. Again, I am so very sorry that they did not accept you. It is going to be alright, though! I promise you! Even though things have been rough for you, look at you! You have survived every single, err, 'rough patch' this life has dragged you through, correct? And I am sure you will survive this one! You are strong!
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You do not need to be afraid to cry, dear. It is what makes you human, is it not? I do understand the fear of showing said emotional vulnerability, but surely, you will be okay. My arms shall always be open if you'd like a hug, anonymous. I have hope that you will be just fine!
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~
Yea, i understand that feeling all too well. Before Hope’s Peak, I can’t tell you how many times I was rejected for certain schools. It really hits your self esteem, doesn’t it? Don’t worry anon, rejection is normal, albeit a shitty feeling to receive.
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You feel pain right now, but I know you’ll get through this rejection. There are other opportunities so this won’t make you feel down forever! I’d say that time is on your side.
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I know you will be ok in the long run, that I believe in more than anything. Even if you can’t talk to your parents, you can always come to us or even if you have a trusted friend, you can talk to them. Whatever makes you feel comfortable, you know? Take care anon, don’t let this get you down. You’re going to be ok.
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