#maybe i need some kind of routine to start working at any of those | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

miserycanary · 1 month

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WHAT YOU'RE MEANT TO DO ᡣ𐭩

pairing: alpha!Simon 'Ghost' Riley & workcaholic omega fem!reader

synopsis: you've lived your whole life without any problems due to the status of being beta, and you liked it that way. It doesn't interfere with your work, and suddenly you're informed you're an omega? That can't be.

tags: small arguments, smut like.. actually, dumbification, slight size kink, belly bulge, hair pulling, praise, degradation, breeding kink??, daddy kink, slight overstimulation if you squint, spit kink if you live in delusions

You had a routine you religiously followed. The day starts with waking up at 4, never having trouble getting up because you always look forward to work. You leave the apartment you share with your boyfriend at 5:15— maybe later than that when Simon feels clingy and asks you to stay for that day. You’ll indulge for 5 minutes before pressing a kiss on his chapped lips, promising you’ll come home early for him which seems to satisfy him.

Now you knew something was wrong when you woke up, exhausted, and all your bones weighed like a ton. Thinking back to last night, the clock displayed 10:15 when you finally resigned to bed, even unable to satisfy Simon (which he understood), opting to cuddle with you and nosing around your neck.

Your groan woke up Simon, his muscled figure making the bed creak as he followed your figure almost dragging itself to the bathroom. “Sweetheart?” he calls out, worry evident in his voice. “I’m fine, baby. Just feeling a little under the weather. Nothing some meds won’t fix,” the reassurance slips off your tongue easily despite all the alarms in your mind begging you to rest.

Your breathing got labored as your body tried to function. Your lover seems to have taken your word for it and went back to sleep, making you crack a smile.

Finally, you managed to get ready.. at 5:40. On the way, you could feel stares pointing at you. Did you smell? ‘Did I shower? I.. forgot. No, no... I did..’ you think to yourself, putting your things down on the table and letting your legs rest. “What kind of fucking sickness is this?” mumbling to yourself. Your eyebrows furrow, cursing at the world and complaining about the medicine not taking effect.

Time seemed to go fast but unbearably slow. It seemed like you could only recognize snippets throughout the day. Next thing you know, you hear your boyfriend’s worrying voice coming from your phone. Since when did you call? Nevermind. You hung up. Your mind flashes forward and the bright shine of your laptop looks back. For quite some time, you don’t recall moving, just looking dazed. ‘Water. I need water’ You finally snap back to reality, standing up. The world suddenly swirled and you found yourself on the floor.

‘Oh, shit. I-I need to get up... Fuck, my legs won’t move'

Tears swelled in your eyes, feeling helpless as people started to crowd you. Amid the commotion, a thundering voice booms out, calling for you. “Y/N!” Suddenly, all you could feel was the cool feeling of your boyfriend’s skin on yours. His scent fills your senses. God, you could live off this. “Babe.. why are you here?” you look at him, sighing in relief when you feel his palm pressed against your cheek. “You called me, slurring your words.” His voice was so deep and rough, you thought. Involuntarily, you squeezed your legs when you felt something gush in between. Your period? No, no.. too early. Unaware, everyone seemed to catch up to what’s wrong with you. Everyone rushed to distance themselves from you when Simon held you protectively, hiding you away from everyone and glaring at those who seemed to look at you like prey ready to be devoured.

Before you lost consciousness, all you could think of was you forgot to save your document. Then the next thing you wake up to is your apartment’s ceiling and the clattering from your kitchen with heavy footsteps. You could only assume it’s your boyfriend trying to cook. “Ghost..?” you call out, voice hoarse. In an instant, he was by your side with water in hand. “Hi, baby,” he starts, pushing the glass near your lips. You whine when you can’t even move to take a sip, and he melts at that. With gentleness, he tangles his fingers in your hair and pulls your head back, tilting the glass. “Open,” he commanded, which your body seemed to obey, your mouth opening and letting the cold water relieve your parched throat. As some droplets escape and cascade down your cleavage, you moan as it momentarily relives the heat your skin radiates.

“Love...” your boyfriend starts with the tone you know he uses when it’s about something that will upset you. “You’re required by the doctor to stay home for 2 weeks,” he continues, which finally tips you off. “No! I-I have a project due in 5 days, okay? I just need some paracetamol.” Insisting, you move to get up but you feel your boyfriend’s palm on your waist pinning you down. “No, bunny. You’re staying.” You glare at him in return. A part of you was aware that he was doing this for your sake, but you were too stubborn to let him. “Ghost, stop. I’m not in the mood for any lovey shits, okay? Just let me be,” you snap. Usually, when you get this pissed, he lets you be and just rushes by your side when you inevitably pass out due to over-exhaustion. This time, he doesn’t.

His stare was firm and commanding unlike the usual. Your Simon was soft, always there to clean up your mess. He never forces you to rest nor to listen to him— even if it is for the better. “Bunny, it’s not normal sickness, okay?” he still calmly explains, brushing the stray hair away from your face but you only slap his hand away, still frustrated. Seeing that you’re getting an attitude, he sighs and kisses your temple. “Do you know what your secondary gender is?” At his question, you stare at him like he asked you if you know the sky is blue. “Fucking hell, Ghost. Of course! I told you this the moment we met. I’m a beta, okay? Can you let me go now?” you hissed, attempting to raise his heavy hand of your hand yet he persisted and pressed harder. “No, princess,” he looks away in contemplation. “I rushed you to the doctor earlier, and… your testing was a mistake. You’re a freshly developed omega and it was advised you.. naturally let your heat happen.”

There were a few beats of silence before you cackled, tears forming in your eyes. “Yeah, right, babe. As if. Can you just fucking let me go?” The news of you being an omega sounded fake— because it is, you scoff. “I’m not joking,” he mumbles with a new profound authority. After realizing he was serious, everything came crashing down on you. This couldn’t be. You loved being a beta. It doesn’t interfere with your life. You can’t be an omega. You can’t! No, it’s fake. This was a joke! Heats?? You?? No, no. That’s not true–

“Y/N! Breathe!” Simon’s voice snapped you out of your haze, looking down to see your nails pressed so hard on his skin that’s letting out droplets of blood. Sobs were robbed out of your body, refusing to accept the change in you, yelling at your boyfriend to let you go. His figure immediately wrapped itself around you, pressing your face on his chest and nuzzling your head. “Calm down, bunny. It’s fine... Just calm down,” he soothes, putting his hand under your shirt to rub circles on your burning skin, and trying to get your breathing to match his. His shirt was drenched with tears but he didn’t mind. He muttered endless praises in your ear about how brave you are, and how you’ll be fine because he’s there. Ghost is there for you.

“I’m here, sweetheart” he cooed, pressing a kiss on your ear and laying the both of you down on the bed. He covered you entirely with his figure, protecting you from the world. With a final hiccup, you lose yourself to sleep and exhaustion, settling down and letting yourself be vulnerable with him with his pheromones blanketing your senses as if he’s the only thing there.

Waking up with a gasp, a layer of sweat covered your whole body when your attention was suddenly redirected to the wet spot below you that seemed to seep into the bedsheets. Hot panic took you over and you suddenly felt ashamed. Did you pee yourself out of nervousness? Clamouring, you stumble as you try to wipe the spot away, whimpering when another sudden gush dripped down your legs which woke Simon.

“Sweetheart? What’s up with ‘ya?”

You cry, rushing to his side and throwing yourself at him while apologizing profusely. “I-I’m sorry! Baby, I’m sorry... Please forgive me. I didn’t know!”

“Calm down, calm down.. tell me what’s happening,” his voice immediately calmed you down, your hands still clenching tight on his shirt and sticking your face in his scent gland. In an instant, the strong smell of whiskey, ground, and cigar invaded your nose but you welcomed it. The aroma calms down your nerves and allows you to talk without tumbling over your words. “I-I.. peed,” you mumble in shame that surprised your lover, but it seems the situation clicked in his head and he only responded with a chuckle.

“No, baby... You didn’t pee,” he sighs, grabbing your waist and sitting you sideways on his lap, while he scoots backward to lean on the headboard. “It’s something omega releases in substitution to lube,” he starts his hand slowly peeling away your shorts, revealing your soaked panties. “This is slick,” his finger swipes along the covered lips of your pussy, a string sticking to his pad. He brings his soaked fingers near you when the smell suddenly hit him. You smell like cherry-fucking-pie.

‘Fuck, she smells so sweet. No, I need to be patient. It’s her first heat’ he thinks while he watches your eyes observe with fascination. He nosed around your scent gland taking in your pheromones that sent blood rushing to his dick. His hand pulls your panties to the side to directly flick on your clit, pressing his thumb down and circling. You whimper, holding onto his shirt as your legs instinctively close. Everything was heightened. It felt like you’d come any minute just from your clit getting pressed down.

“Spread them.” As if your body was possessed, your thighs separate, allowing Simon to completely slip off your underwear and press a single digit inside of you. The reaction was instant. Your back arches and your toes curl in pleasure, red chipped nails digging into his bicep, but he was too immersed in watching your pretty cunt take what he gives you to even care. “Good girl,” he praises, pressing his lips against your ear. Tilting your head to the side, you attempt on taking cover on his bicep, but Ghost only grabs your face, tilting it back.

“Daddy needs to hear you, princess”

Your moans got higher as he added another finger and pumped them, borderline abusing your cunt. But you needed this. How else will you take your alpha’s massive cock? Looking down on you, he melts as babbles and whines were the only things you could muster. Your body writhes in pleasure, eyes rolling back in pleasure. “S-Simon! I’m... a-ah!.. close!” Feeling your release climbing, your pussy clenches around his digits while urging him to go faster; just a little more push to your climax. A scandalized gasp was ripped out of you when he suddenly stopped completely. “No, how do you ask to cum properly?” his voice grumbles, squishing your cheeks while your face is soaked with tears. “I wanna cum, Simon. Please please please–” he cuts you off, tightening his hold on your face and pressing his thumb hard on your clit. “No, not Simon.”

With that, you finally realized the key to your release. “Daddy, please. I wanna cum, please. P-put your fingers in again. Daddy, please” you whine, a hand releasing his bicep to place itself on his nape, pulling him down so you can messily press a kiss. Satisfied, he plunged 3 fingers in, forcing your cunt to take it. “There we go. Was that so hard, princess? Was it hard being polite to daddy?” he teases, pressing down on your sweet spot. His tongue licks around your mouth, sucking on the wet appendage and letting his saliva trickle down into yours.

You felt so tight around his digits, and the thought of how you’ll feel around him made his cock ache. The hard-on pressing against your lower back which lifted as the coil inside of you snapped. He watches with adoration as you soak his fingers and the bedsheets, a sense of accomplishment bubbling up inside his chest, making precum dribble out of his tip and stain his sweatpants. “Good girl,” the praise slips off his tongue absentmindedly as he sneaks a hand behind you, untying his pants and pulling it down just enough for his cock to spring free.

Still high from pleasure, he manhandles your body to the position he wants. Pushing your body forward so your face is planted on the sheets with your hips resting on two-stacked pillows. Amid pleasure, you got brought back when overstimulation ran through your nerves, feeling Ghost’s cock fill you up, inch by inch. You didn’t even realize when he had taken his bottoms off. The only thought running through your head was him, his smell, his overpowering pheromones, and his cock. God, his cock was driving you crazy.

“Babygirl, you need to loosen up,” he orders, slithering a hand under you to swirl around your clit. “No!.. oh! s-sensitive!” you whine, sobbing onto the pillow. “I don’t care, sweetie. You had your fill, now daddy needs his. Won’t you be a good girl and help me? I promise I’ll reward you,” he mutters, his chest pressing on your back. Driven with the need to be good for him, you let your cunt relax to take him in.

Slowly rutting his hips, he tries to thrust more of his cock inside of you. “Slowly, baby. Breathe for me. There we go. Perfect,” he groans, pressing his forehead on your nape when he finally felt himself completely buried inside your hot, wet cunt. “Such a perfect pussy. You want to make me proud, don’t ya?” You only whine in response, then a loud moan ripped out of you when you felt a subtle bulge on your stomach which got pressed down onto the pillow under the weight Ghost was putting down you. “Fuck, you’re so small, aren’t ya? Such a perfect cocksleeve. What a behaved slut for me.” Without a warning, he snaps his hips, thrusting in and out of you without mercy; like a carnal animal with the intent to just breed. God, this is heaven. This is where he’s supposed to be. With you, inside of you.

“I’m gonna fill you up so good, ma” he moans, your voice matching his. “Ah-ah-ah! Fast! Too fa— oh! Too fast,” you sobbed yet it felt so good. Every sense of yours was drowning with the thought of your mate, of Simon. You were so lost in pleasure, hands sprawled out on the sheets and gripping, trying to crawl away from the overwhelming pleasure. Ghost only clicks his tongue, putting his hands on your waist and pulling you back, filling you to the brim again.

“Daddy was too lenient on you huh? Maybe I need to keep you here. You won’t ever need to use that pretty head of yours, worrying about nothing, sweetie. I’ll do everything for you, okay? Your alpha will do everything for you.” You feel him pull back with the tip catching on your rim. As if given a break, you take a breath but suddenly everything was knocked out of you when he bottomed out with one thrust.

“F-fuck, you feel amazing. You just need to be good to me, okay? You just need to be a good mama for our children, stay at home, and let me use your pretty pussy when daddy needs to relieve stress” Pinning your waist down, it was like he actually sees you as a personal cocksleeve, using your body for his own release.

Thrusting faster, Ghost’s moans start to pitch higher, his hand tangling itself in your locks to pull your face from the pillow. Locking lips, he moans louder while pressing down on the bulge in your stomach, helping him get closer from the fact you’re so small— so easily to manhandle and to use freely. Maybe he should actually just keep you here. You won’t need to work. No need to stress that pretty head of yours over trivial stuff. He just needs you to stay with him.

The thought of you being swollen with his baby and staying inside the apartment waiting for him was the final thing that sent him to the edge. His tip spurting out cum filled you up to no end, kissing the entrance of your womb as he buried himself as deep as possible. Your hands scramble to hold onto something, afraid to get lost in the pleasure; scared of being a slave to the mind-numbing pleasure. You dig your nails on his thigh, sobbing and moaning in pleasure as his release triggered another of yours. Feeling so full, Ghost finally stopped cumming and lets you go. His spent body collapsing alongside you in exhaustion. Silence ensued between you guys, basking in each other’s presence. After a while, he got up to grab a towel to clean you up, knowing you’d be insatiable once your omega instincts completely settled.

Feeling his lips kiss your temple, his rough yet sultry deep voice (or maybe that’s just your love for him talking) telling you to relax made you purr. As you watch him take care of you, scrubbing down both yours and his spent off your body got you thinking. Maybe this is where you’re supposed to be. Doing nothing but behaving for your lover, keeping Ghost happy.

꒰ა ☆ ໒꒱: AHHHH!! It's my first full-length fanfic which happens to be my very first explicit and descriptive smut. Please be gentle with the criticisms!! Also, do you guys want a König version? Please comment if yes.

dividers by @cafekitsune

Please reblog!! Ask is open!

⟢ taglist is open!! Comment if you want to be tagged in the next posts.

check out my other works in the masterlist: ୭!

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mysticmikalla · 5 months

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Stardew Valley Bachelors Cuddling Headcanons

thinkin' about cuddly bachelors to Cope

Harvey

Harvey is one of those people who only lay in bed when he is ready to go to sleep, so cuddling is usually a pre-sleep activity, an added treat at the end of his long day

I think he likes being both the little and big spoon, but prefers being held just a liiiitle bit more

He likes to lay with you after a shower, a shave and his teeth are brushed, because once he lays down with you.... only the shrill sound of his alarm going off in the morning will be enough to get him back up

Harvey is one of those people who hate a rushed routine and take punctuality very seriously

But because waking up in your arms just feels too darn good sometimes, he sets an alarm a little earlier than his usual one, just so he can be awake enough to enjoy the first minutes of the morning being held by you

Shane

I believe Shane likes to be horizontal more than he likes to be vertical on a good day, anyway

But after you? Oh boy

There is no feeling like coming home and being able to sink into the mattress, his body heavy with the weight of the day

And now on top of that he then gets to have the person he loves laying on his chest? Tracing his skin with your fingers absentmindedly? Massaging his scalp with the pads on your fingers?

It’s his favorite thing in the world, actually

He'll cling on to you especially tight after a rough day, only reluctantly letting you go if you absolutely must

Sam

Although Sam loves it when it’s just you and him and his bed in your own little world, this man cannot sit still for too long

If you’re just laying together and talking, he needs to be playing with your fingers, with your hair, playfully biting your arm, a tickle attack or two

He also likes to lay on you. Like, fully - body completely on top of yours as he scrolls on his phone or rambles about something while you run your hands through his blond hair

Maybe he has too much energy, or maybe it's the ADHD I headcanon him to have, or maybe he's just really excited to finally get some alone time with you

… Sam just wants to be all over you, all at once

Unless he’s super exhausted or it’s before going to sleep, cuddling with Sam is not usually a bonding relaxing experience, but rather bonding over a playful one

Sebastian

Because of how he is and how he prefers to show and receive affection, Sebastian has always been kind of touch-starved, tbh

Especially in the beginning of the relationship

I think it’s no secret that he isn’t a very touchy person in general, but...

Sebastian liked cuddling a lot more than he was willing to admit or ask for at first

But back when you two first started dating, you would waste days away in his bed, talking about nothing and everything for hours, sleeping together, playing together, getting high, having sex, repeat

Just… you and him and him and you in your own world, limbs comfortably tangled with each other

Especially during the winter when you didn’t have as much farm work, you two would only pull away from each other for bare necessities

After you’re married and he’s moved in, he likes that the bed is bigger and sometimes you two can lay together and do your own thing in your own space

But in the end he’ll always gravitate back towards you

Elliot

Cuddling with Elliot is peaceful

His voice takes on another melody when it’s just you and him in the comfort of his bed

The lights are dim but bright enough so that he can softly read you to sleep

He plays with your hair, his touches soft and gentle along the exposed skin of your arms

And he smells so good, and it's all around you as you lay in the comfort of his arms

Elliot likes it when you’re draped on him and he gets to wrap his arms around you and envelop you fully

Any position that allows him to be so close to you is his favorite

It’s…. safe. And Elliot likes safe

Alex

I firmly believe Alex prefers being the little spoon the majority of the time

Sometimes muscly jocks just want to be held, you know?

He likes to feel your body pressed against his from behind, and he’ll pull on your arms, tightening them around him, as if he’s letting you know how much he doesn’t want you to let go quite yet

He'll kiss the top of your hair, then bury his face on your neck and place kisses there too, sometimes innocent, sometimes not

Although not as bad as Sam, Alex doesn’t like to sit still for too long, either, so cuddling sessions are either before bed or a brief but welcome break during the day

#stardew valley #sdv #stardew valley headcanons #sdv headcanons #sdv harvey #sdv shane #sdv sam #sdv sebastian #sdv elliott #sdv alex #idk man im having cramps today and i just want to be held

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cozycottagetarot · 3 months

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What Do They Daydream About You?

How To Pick A Pile:

Everyone has their own technique for choosing a 'pile'. My recommendation is to clear your mind and focus on each image for a few seconds. The image you find yourself coming back to even when you focus on the other images is the pile for you.

Quick notes on this reading:

I'm experimenting with a different style. -- I've been working on shorter, less structured, formal pacs (and some longer ones). I'm not sure how I feel about it but I'd like to hear your thoughts too!

I apologise for any errors. -- My immune system and I have literally been at war for weeks, so know if there are any errors, I probably missed it while wincing in pain. 😅

It's purely for entertainment purposes. -- Don't think I need to explain more. Take what resonates be it all of it, some of it or none at all.

PILE 1

14:44 as I pulled the last card, maybe 444 is of importance to you at the moment. Knight in shining armour vibes. Noble acts or intentions of just sweeping you off your feet. Introducing you to their friends and or family. Daydreams of big celebrations of being with you, internally and externally. For some, they daydream about celebrating the news of having a child with you. Finding peace after long struggles... starting anew with you. Domestic bliss, as in chilling at home with someone you love, not doing much of anything. Or simply enjoying the mundane tasks together. Going for walks. Having a cup of tea or coffee together. Peppering your skin with kisses... maybe physical touch is their love language. The ghost of their fingertips on your skin. Heart-to-heart conversations. Falling into a routine with you. The magic of embarking on new beginnings with you.

PILE 2

North Star Vibes. Holding out hope that they make it to you. Trying to make life better so they can show up for you. They daydream about how you make them stronger, about you being a good influence on them. It's like the thought of you soothes them when they're struggling. Dreaming that happiness is coming in the form of you. Lots of fiery energy. You're a symbol of hope. Rediscovering what they had lost with you. Feels like someone who has been through a lot. Playfulness. Daydreaming about you is embodying those feelings that seem long forgotten. I know I keep repeating the same thing over and over, but I'm not getting anything more than that (even when I go back to the literal meaning of the cards) so I pulled some love messages. There's the cards 'twin flame', 'finding myself' and 'still listening'. My interpretation is that daydreaming about you holds a mirror up to themselves which inspires them to look deeper within and figure out what they want and who they want to be. They could also find solace in music, they may have a song or playlist that makes them feel more connected to you.

PILE 3

If you were drawn to pile 2, consider checking out that pile as well too. 333. The number 3 could hold some sort of significance.

Dreaming of an equal. Someone to keep them balanced and bring a new perspective. They could feel as though (or know) some kind of scrutiny is possible, but they spend their time dreaming of overcoming it. There could be cultural differences or for some it's a matter of being in a same-sex relationship or anything that goes against what may be more commonly accepted. If it's of any significance, the red string of fate (two different decks mention it). Power couple vibes. Being able to maintain a sense of youthfulness in the relationship. Someone who won't try to take advantage of them, who'll push them to be better and vice versa, who'll look out for them. Someone to heal with and understand that they are still healing. They could dream of having a child with you or starting a family in whatever format that may look like to both of you. Daydreams of warmth & protection. Giving and receiving. You could possibly meet at a concert or connect over music.

PILE 4

I did a repull to make sure I was reading the cards right (it was stormy) and the same cards came out after reshuffling (minus one card). I feel like this person has been reborn. Who they were is not who they are now (or when you meet them). They could daydream of being divinely guided towards you. Someone spiritual or religious. At the very least finding a connection with something (a concept) greater than them. Daydreams of being guided towards happiness. They had a teardown and rebuild of who they are. They could be from a different location, you could meet when travelling across a large body of water. It feels like they're dreaming of coming in hot. They're paving the way for their happy ending. Take it as you will, but instead of a 'damsel in distress' (regardless of gender, it's just women on the cards depicting forging on) type of story, it's one of those ones where it's like "you know what, I'll save myself and I'll chase after my happy ending". Actually, I get a-spec vibes as well and that this person could be a platonic love or a strong platonic bond. It could even be you respectively. But the energy is one of being inspired and ever-lasting bonds. A new resolve, coming home to oneself, resting in the knowledge that the future is going to be good because you'll make it so.

#quick pick #pick a card #pick a pile #pac reading #tarot reading #cozycottagetarot

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throneofsapphics · 5 months

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I figured I should ask before requesting but here goes nothing, again, ‼️TW‼️;

Can I request more angst with Az? Like uhmm.... Maybe the reader has extreme trust issues and she finally has opened up to Az but now that Elaine is here, she finds Ax drifting (not much but they don't do their normal dinners together as much as they used to, they don't bathe together as much, etc, small things she needs to that stability) and it starts to eat away at her but she doesn't want to tell Az about her feelings because she feels like a burden but then maybe Mor or someone convinces her to talk to him but he's had a long day so he snaps at her and leaves and she ends up... Offing herself..... Uhm.. and then Az's finding her body the next morning and his reaction and everyone else's too...... 👁️👁️

It only takes three

Azriel x Reader

Summary: “There were three words you came to say, three little syllables, and it only took three to shatter you.”

Warnings: suicide, pills & alcohol, suicidal ideation, angst

A/N: I appreciate you asking, thank you for the request! & what’s a little more trauma for the inner circle? know your triggers y'all, this is heavy

Azriel dedicated himself to gaining your trust. The one person who managed to knock those walls down, and it took decades before you’d opened up to him. Mor was a close second. Maybe it was a cliche, but he understood you, more than anyone else. He’d listened through everything, listened as you broke, and helped you put the pieces back together.

All these years, you’d been waiting and hoping he’d see it, hoping he’d feel the same bond you did. You were somewhere between friends and lovers, nothing ever clear or defined. But, you knew he was the one person you could rely on.

Resentment was ugly, and so was jealousy, but you couldn’t help those emotions as you watched his infatuation with the middle Archeron sister grow. It was nothing against her, she truly was a lovely person, and you could see why Azriel took an interest in her. The nasty little voice told you he’d grown tired of you, that you were too much, that he’d found someone less burdensome - as you’d always feared.

At first, you wrote it off as him being busy. That’s what he said - and he’d never lied to you. After the war with Hybern, things hadn’t quite settled and his workload was high. You tried to be understanding, to be respectful of the boundaries he’d subtly set. But you craved your old routine. Wednesday morning breakfasts, him slipping into your bed when he couldn’t sleep, bringing him tea when you knew he was working a late night. He used to always leave his door cracked, but recently it had been locked. Any knocks went unanswered, even though you could hear him inside. Instead, you’d leave the cup outside of his door, only to find it there in the mornings - untouched.

It really began to fall apart, to you, when you went to visit Feyre at the River House. Azriel said he had some kind of work mission, that he’d be out for the day, and as Feyre led you around, he was in the gardens, with Elain. You didn’t let him see you, instead you stuck out the rest of the tour with a smile, saving your tears for home.

It was a different type of torture, watching the one person destined for you fall in love with someone else. You tortured yourself too, holding on to hope he’d realize and he’d come back to you.

Finally, you built the courage to tell Mor. You needed a sounding board, someone to give some advice, someone outside of your head.

“Tell him,” Mor encouraged you, “he’ll understand.”

“He’s been pulling away, I don’t want him to think I’m trying to … I don't know, trap him.”

“Az,” she sighed, “he’s wanted to find his mate for … well maybe even for centuries. For a shadowsinger, he’s too stubborn to see what’s right in front of him,” her mouth curved up at one corner. “If you don’t tell him, he might never know. I imagine you’re tired of waiting.”

“You have no idea,” you laughed, but stood. Brave. Three words; I’m your mate, and at least the weight would be off your chest. Whatever happened next, whatever his reaction was, you could figure that out as it came. Despite the growing distance, he was still the person you trusted above all, and you knew he wouldn’t hurt you.

For once, his door was open. This felt like a good sign.

“Az,” you called, peeking your head inside the room. “Can I talk to you about something?”

“Tomorrow,” a clipped one word answer, not even bothering to look up from his desk.

“It really is important.”

“It can wait.” there was such a finality in his tone. Almost like he thought nothing regarding you could be important. But you wanted to give it one more shot.

“Please-”

“I don’t care, whatever it is, I. Don’t. Care.”

Well, he’d finally looked up at you, like you were some obnoxious fly he was trying to get rid of. Swallowing your tears, you nodded and turned away. Part of you knew you couldn’t promise tomorrow.

There were three words you came to say, three little syllables, and it only took three to shatter you. To shatter the fragile self he’d helped you build.

Maybe it was intentional. You knew exactly what this cocktail could do to you, and you wanted that sweet release to drag you under. When every breath felt like a chore, every word like an ache tearing out of you, it felt like the only option.

One hand clutched the bottle of pills, the other the bottle of wine.

Pills from a friend, who warned you taking too many could kill you. That warning was a siren call now.

You were already drunk when you poured the entire bottle into your hands, throwing them back without a second thought, wine washing them down. It would take you into sweet, sweet oblivion, and only the mother knew whether you’d wake up on this earth or not.

Maybe your soul could become one of those pretty little spirits, migrating on starfall. Or maybe you’d end up in another universe, like the ones you studied in the library. You giggled to yourself. Anywhere else felt like a better option now.

You were definitely hallucinating, because three little butterflies floated in front of you, reaching out you felt them touch your fingers. Was it welcoming? Or an omen? The butterflies faded, bursting into dust, and the tears began. A few minutes later, you knew nothing.

“Where’s y/n?” Mor asked Azriel as he stalked into the room. He was still in a piss-poor mood, and this was the last thing he wanted to do this morning. Going to a court meeting.

“Do I look like her keeper?”

Mor seemed a bit confused by his response. “Can you get her?”

He wanted to ask; why not you, but it felt a bit too childish. Besides, he needed to talk about last night anyway. Too late, a shadow whispered in his ear. It’s never too late, he could fix this. Taking the stairs two at a time, he headed for your bedroom. Shadows swirled around him, in front of him, searching and … storming the room. They unlocked the door before he could, gone, gone, gone, they whispered to him. Had you left in the middle of the night? He couldn’t hear you in there, but your scent was still fresh.

And alcohol. A pit settled in his stomach. Gone. Too late.

Azriel pushed the door open. Not in your room. A small click and his shadows opened the door to your bathing room. There were sweet and tender memories from that room. Him washing your hair, delicately working through the strands that always seemed tangled, you washing his wings.

He didn’t think this would be one of those memories.

Pushing the door open, he fell to his knees.

Mor heard the guttural scream, one of pain and sorrow. Something she’d never heard from Az. Mor didn’t bother taking the stairs, and winnowed to your door. Directly across from her, another door was swung open, offering her a clear view. Azriel on his knees in front of … your body. Lips blue, skin white. His hands pressed down on your chest, up and down, up and down.

“You’re late,” Rhys said, echoing through her mind. She only cast the image to him. Within a minute, more voices and footsteps sounded inside the house. Mor had already crossed the room, kneeling next to Azriel, her magic searching desperately for a sign of life.

Minutes later, Madja was there, crowding in behind her. Cassian pulled a thrashing Azriel away from your body.

Mor could only stand by the door, mouth parted and body still in shock.

An empty pill bottle, one blue pill laying next to your hand, as if it had fallen out. An empty bottle of wine on the floor, dregs of red liquid still gathering in the bottle.

Today was supposed to be good. Last night, you’d told Azriel you were his mate. She was prepared for the two of you to miss today entirely.

Something had gone terribly wrong. Whirling around, she took one step closer to the shadowsinger, each movement laced with fury, entire body trembling.

“Did you reject her?” Mor had skipped the earthly and deadly quiet, and screamed at Az, power rumbling through the room.

“What do you mean reject?”

“She is - was - your mate.”

Azriel felt like his world stopped. Each word sliced into his chest. Mate.

That’s what you wanted to tell him, and he told you, unequivocally, that he didn’t care. He was the person you trusted above all others, at one point. The one who spent decades breaking down those walls, slowly and carefully gaining your trust. Decades working towards that goal, and a year to throw it away.

This was his fault.

He could imagine the hopeful look on your face as you peeked into his door. If he’d seen that … if he’d just looked.

“Az, can I talk to you about something?” Fuck, he’d forgotten to lock his door. Papers obscured his entire vision. Today had been too damn much, and he didn’t want to talk to anyone. It wasn’t specifically you.

“Tomorrow,”

“It really is important.” Desperation, but he knew there wasn’t much going on in your life. A shadow swirled angrily at the callous thoughts.

“It can wait.”

“Please-”

He looked at you, your face had fallen. The beginnings of tears gathering in the corners of your eyes. Listen, listen, listen, his shadows were nearly begging. Tomorrow, he told them.

“I don’t care, whatever it is, I. Don’t. Care.”

You finally left. A small tinge of guilt, but he’d make it up to you tomorrow, or maybe the next day - that would be Wednesday, and he’d get up early to bring you breakfast, the old tradition you’d fallen out of habit with. Something easily revived.

Tomorrow, however, would be chock full of meetings. Meetings you’d be at too, and he’d make the time to hear you out, to apologize.

Now, a shadow curled next to his ear, pleading. He ignored it. They’d always favored you, and now he’d even say they were fussing. You were strong enough.

Azriel had ignored everything. Ignored each warning sign, ignored the desperate pleas of his shadows and the tears on your face. You cried, but it was never often.

“It’s my fault,” he said - more to himself. “My fault.”

He felt himself crumble, felt everything he used to keep himself in check slip away, his magic threatening to burst from him, to turn this house to rubble. He didn’t fight as Rhys grabbed him, as he winnowed him out to somewhere far out in the mountains. His brother released him as soon as they landed, but didn’t leave, he didn’t abandon him. Rhys should’ve, should’ve left him out here to bury himself. That’s what he deserved.

The ground shook, parts of the mountains surrounding him faded into dust, snow flooded down the sides, birds squawked as they fled. He spent hours, hours and hours up there - until his siphons dulled, until he felt his magic start to protest, until Rhys had to knock him unconscious before he let it tear him apart.

#azriel x y/n #azriel x reader #acotar drabble #acotar x reader

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mysticheathenn · 1 month

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What Don't You See Coming?

Hi, Hexlings!

This pick-a-card reading is all about what kind of abundance (more friends, money, better love, etc) or warnings you don't see coming.

This is a general reading, remember to take what resonates and leave what does not. This reading does not supplement your need to seek professional help.

Take your time when choosing your pile. Ask yourself the question and choose the picture that you can’t stop looking at. Listen to your intuition.

MasterList

Patreon Link

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Pile l:

Tarot: 10 of Cups, 7 of Cups, 9 of Cups, The Awakening, The High Priestess.

Okay coming in hot pile l which is also the song that played as I gazed at your cards by Andy Mineo. Pile one what you don't see coming is emotional fulfillment and a spiritual awakening. This awakening is you seeing the many possibilities in your life and how abundant your life truly is. You may have been going through a hard time for a while now and wonder when will things get better and soon, you will see the light at the end of the tunnel. For some of you, this could be a spiritual awakening. You are becoming more aware of your most authentic self. Maybe you have been trying to figure out who you are, and what aesthetic you fall under if you are into that (goth, emo, soft girl, that girl, cottagecore, etc etc. For others you you may have been working on a project that you have been feeling a lot of doubts about or maybe haven't seen any feedback on what you have been working on this could be gaining clients, getting more YouTube followers, etc soon your time to shine is coming. I can't say when but keep pushing you are almost there. I know you want to give up and you are tired but keep on pushing you are almost there at the finish line. I see you are very close..how close imagine running a marathon and you see the finish line and the many people crowded around it. That my friend is how close you are to the finish line. Don't lose hope. Lastly, those who have been doubting your intuition stop. Nothing is wrong with your intuition. Now is more than the right time to lean more into it and let it guide you on your current path, I'm hearing you may feel stuck and this is the reason why. You aren't letting your intuition guide you. Your intuition is another way your guides speak to you. Listen to it and stop being hard-headed.

Pile ll:

Tarot: The Chariot, 3 of Cups, Ace of Pentacles, Queen of Swords, The Priestess.

Travel. Friendship, Financial Growth. This pile I believe some of you may be tarot readers just starting out with your own tarot blog, YouTube channel, etc, and wondering if this is the path for you. Keep going you are on the right path just have patience with yourself and you will see growth in no time. Slow and steady always wins the race love, you will get to where you want to be in making this a part of your career or even a side gig if that's what you want to make of this. IF not tarot this is more so of my creatives who are trying to put themselves out there on the internet. Now for the rest of you what you don't see coming is if not travel more directions but I am seeing travel and maybe even moving houses if you want to relocate. But overall you are moving in some shape or form whether physically or figuratively, you are moving. Just as a few people from pile one you may feel lost and need guidance in what you should be doing in this period of your life. Maybe you just hit a new milestone (30 yrs old, 25 yrs old, or even 21 yrs old, etc) and you are wondering what is it that you want out of this next decade that will make you into a better person. Listen to what guidance is downloaded to you and follow it no matter how strange or out of your routine it maybe now is not the time to question your reality. Also for a few of you who have fallen off from your spiritual practice, your guides are calling you to start back and tap into them so they can give you more guidance. You are letting your current stress and struggles lead you and it's not down the path you should be going on. Overall pile ll, you are heading into financial abundance and movement. Some of you are also meeting your soul tribe, but it's only a very select few of you as that message took the back seat to everything.

Pile lll:

Tarot: 7 of Swords, The Hanged Man, 2 of Swords, 3 of Cups (reversed), and Queen of Cups (reversed)

Stillness and Decisions. Overall, Stillness is what you don't see coming pile lll. This may not be what you want to hear but during this time you are being called to make some decisions in your life. Some of you are dealing with people specifically friends or family members who are not good for your well being and you are making a difficult decision on whether you should cut them off. Some of you are waiting to see if 2+2 is equaling four (meaning you are waiting to see if your intuition is right) while others of you are just not wanting to pull the plug because you won't have anyone to call a friend or family but who needs to have friends or family like the ones you may possibly be dealing with. For others of you, this stillness is all about catering to your feminine energy and healing. Make better decisions based on what you want to nurture and bring into your life. Some of you may operate in your masculine energy and are having a hard time trying to balance your feminine energy because your environment around you keeps forcing you to be the leader, coach, alpha, etc when all you want to do is lay back and let someone else take the reigns for a bit and if not that at least relax. Take a spa trip, and not have to worry about the building burning down at work or in other peoples life for just a small moment. You may be the person that everyone goes to for advice and you are starting to feel the emotional toll it is taking on you because not many people are replenishing you or even checking in to make sure you are okay. It's time to cut the cord whether temporarily until you make sure you are okay or permanently. The saying, not my circus, not my monkey popped into my head. Meaning it's not your business or your drama to carry, release it.

Pile lV:

Tarot: 5 of Swords, The Magician, 9 of Pentacles, 7 of Pentacles, 8 of Pentacles, 4 of Cups

I want you to start saying affirmations in the morning pile lv. Start with I am a powerful manifestor. Everything I manifest or pray for I receive. I have everything I need and more. I never lack in any part of my life. I want you to keep saying them until they feel true and you are embodying this energy because that is exactly what you don't see coming or who you are as a person. Some of you may believe in the Law of Assumption, Lucky Girl Syndrom, the Law of Attraction, The Void, etc, either way, I want you to keep persisting and know that what you want wants you. Everything that you desire is chasing you down to give you the life that you want and deserve but you are too focused on the 3D for validation. You are too focused on what I want isn't here, I don't have this yet, I don't have that yet and you need to stop....take a deep breath and hit restart. You are never lacking pile lV and I say this from a perspective of gratitude. Practicing that writing down everything that you are grateful for that you already have will bring in more of what you want. For others of you, You may work in a field or job that is competitive and feel that you are being overlooked and everyone is getting raises and promotions but you, your time to shine is coming just hang in there but back to those who practice spirituality, etc. Financial abundance, luxury, and even recognition I am hearing for some of you is on the way but you have to have faith, and keep pushing through the doubt, keep persisting through the 3D of not seeing what you don't already have because in another reality you already have what you are attracting (not chasing, attracting). You wouldn't have these desires if they weren't meant for you to achieve this lifetime pile lV. You've got this. You are powerful. You can have any and everything you want. Practice your gratitude and affirmations. A few blogs I recommend are @jordynbreeloa777 , @alilarew23 , and @serial777killers

Thank you for liking and reblogging my readings. I always appreciate you guys on here and on Patreon.

Stay Safe and Be Blessed

#spirituality #tarot reading #tarotcommunity #tarotblr #witchblr #pick a card #tarot cards #pac tarot #pick a pile #pac reading #pick an image #pick a photo #pick a picture #blessings

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schwarzkatje · 2 months

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ellie hates you. part 2

a/n: gosh i sure hope you like it depraved. go here for part 1

"fucking coward".

yeah. that pretty much sums up how ellie feels about herself.

"stupid fucking coward".

correction. guess the list just goes on.

the way she had just stormed out of your cabin after eating you out like she had never done to any other girl and after having set her intentions straight, was more than enough material to earn herself such a title.

and by the way, what had her plan been exactly, mh? humiliate you? perhaps, even hoping for some kind of disgust elicited in you? maybe... a little resistance? she had hoped you would have loathed it and instead she got an hungry kitten in heat with moans too high pitched to forget and a pussy so creamy she regrets not having slapped it to see some droplets of juice spurting.

the more she spirals down the black hole that is you, the more she is torn between the overlapping of the ever so present series of events that just occurred, and those which she swears is willing to feed her pride to the first demon she would summon to have them happen.

if only she hadn't been such a pathetic hypocrite, that is.

thus, there she lied. on her bed, alone, with your taste infiltrating her mouth and all her other senses as though you involuntarily tormenting ellie during every goddamn second of her daily life and routine was news.

she had fucked up so bad. so, so fucking bad. for this reason, she may as well let everything go downhill and dance on her own shattered pride and dignity.

with the first hand that responded her instincts, ellie finds herself massaging her crotch through her boxers. closing her eyes adds to the depravity, and thus she goes for it.

her scent is palpable, so much so that her wetness pales in comparison to the strong force with which it hits ellie's nostrils.

and certainly her mind doesn't sit back and let the sheer sensations do all the work. not when it is the most efficient and powerful and filthy tool ellie has.

with such a rotted brain she wastes no more than two seconds to recall how you had sobbed wetly, lips recollecting what was left of your sanity with the sole purpose to beg ellie to keep going, to keep on licking you, to continue her punishment.

but not only that. as ellie discards her underwear and draws confused circles on her clit, she furiously squints her eyes, as though this would accelerate the process of creating even more mental images of you.

and that is how ellie starts tracing the outline of a draft for the continuation of before, once that never happened because of her cowardice. a continuation which involves ellie raising to her feet, flipping you over the counter while hoisting one of your legs to have your pretty hole spread beyond shame.

a scenario full of hair pulling, spanking and even more tears, even more degrading words to which you nod because deep down you know how much of a dirty slut you are and how you need a woman like ellie to remind you your place.

an imaginary alternative to the past that has ellie taking full advantage of your overexposed position to let her own pussy collided against yours, perfectly taking in the shape of one another.

her own clit screaming to meet yours again and again and again until it becomes impossible to distinguish which one of you is closer to madness.

despair is ellie's primary driving force and the responsible for her brutal grip on you hips, deprived of free movement and obliged to follow her pace, the one ellie oh so lucidly wanted to maintain then and there.

her clit doesn't stop fucking your pussy from behind and you can't decide if what is making you roll your eyes the most is when the throbbing bud meets its twin or when it almost gives the illusion of penetrating your moist hole.

ellie will have to wait for another masturbation session to decide how you are going to act and which one of the two options is making you come undone in her fantasy because she is now convulsing on her own hand, while her head contorts in an unnatural position.

but that is all ellie can aspire to do when you and now she too are sabotaging her stupid fucking coward self.

#ellie williams x female reader #ellie williams x reader #ellie x fem reader #ellie x reader #ellie x reader smut #ellie williams smut #ellie x y/n #ellie smut #ellie x you #the last of us smut #ellie williams x you #ellie the last of us #loser!ellie #loser ellie

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beegalactica · 4 months

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How I journaled every day in 2023, and you can too in 2024

I heard someone wants to become "that girl" in 2024...

Well, let me tell you, "that girl" is the type of babe who embodies consistency; consistency in her thoughts, feelings, words and actions. Now one of the ways I have personified this aura of consistency is through frequent inward reflection through journaling.

I know, we've heard it a million times now. And with the new year approaching, it's so easy to set the intention to journal every day and do it well. News flash, my love, you must do much more than just set the intention. Let me tell you how I did it so you can do the same ~

Equipment

Believe me, I've tried it all: countless notebooks, diaries, bullet journals, apps, all of it, but this past year, only one app *stuck* for me, and that is Notion. Whether you prefer to journal with a good old pen and paper, or even if you prefer to make a big Google document, go for it!

The reason I settled on Notion was its table view/ calendar view database features. I liked being able to add properties like what rating out of 5 I would give my day or being able to label whether I was on my period, or any major milestones. I found that these labels made it really fun to look back and laugh at all the crazy things that I came up with, and reminisce over those 5/5 star days when I really felt like that girl. (see example below)

What the hell do you write about?

"You can write about whatever you feel like!" is the usual response, and while that's great if you're anything like me, you'll need more detail than that. I opted for some classic prompts that I would simply respond to at the end of every day, but if you want to freestyle it, try some shadow work prompts, or even just sum up your day in one sentence, you are more than welcome to.

My prompts were:

1. Three wins of the day: 2. One thing I learned today: 3. One thing I will do tomorrow: 4. Am I worried about anything? 5. Favourite thing of my day: 6. Song of the day: 7. A story from today: 8. An affirmation for my mind to sleep on:

You don't have to write paragraphs upon paragraphs if you don't want to, and some days, it might be hard to even think of three wins, but an it girl can be present and celebrate the endless blessings in life, even when it seems like there are none.

How to be consistent?

Going back to the central theme of this post, consistency, it is important to acknowledge that no matter how pretty you make your journal, or how thought-provoking your prompts are, the most important thing is to actually do it.

Life is fluid, it's never going to be linear. Some days you'll feel amazing, gorgeous and ready to take on anything, but other days you'll just wish you were a flower instead that doesn't have to deal with anything. That's just life. Some days, the last thing on my mind was my silly little journal, but I knew it was something I needed to do for myself, so I took 2 minutes to write a few sentences down, even when I'd rather be doing other things.

How to maintain your consistency:

Set reminders - at the start of the year, I had 2 reminders every day to journal; after the first few months, I cut it down to just one at 9pm, and by the end of the year, I was just doing it because it had become a routine for me.

Reward yourself - at first, you'll just be able to say you journaled for 1 day, then it will be 2 days, then slowly up to 1 week, 1 month, and soon you'll be like me, bragging about how you did it for a whole year! It's an accomplishment! Never lose sight of that.

Be kind to yourself - ultimately, this should be something you do for you and you only, so if you miss a day, it's not the end of the world. Every now and then, I didn't journal for a day - maybe I was too busy, or just exhausted by the time my day was over - so I accepted it and caught up first thing the next day. You make your own rules.

JUST START!!!!!!! - do it! Even if you mess up, start again and again and again! Nothing changes if nothing changes.

What's the point?

You've read this far, and you may be wondering, what's the point of journaling?

Well, I can confidently say that journaling changed my outlook on life immensely. 2023 was the best year I've had so far. Yes, there were setbacks: I lost friends that I thought would have forever, I struggled with my mental and physical health, and I reached points where I thought I was too low to get back up. But recording little bits about my day every day showed me, with actual tangible proof, that I will always get back up. I also had some amazing moments this year: I started a whole new school and era of my life, I made amazing friends, I fell in love with myself again and I found my voice.

Journaling has helped me to see the little positives in everyday life. Even when a situation seemed absolutely awful and I thought that I could never recover from it, I developed the mindset that not only could I recover, but I would absolutely recover. This new mindset helped me to laugh at myself in moments when a previous version of me would've shrivelled up into a ball and disappeared from the outside world.

Looking back over my life these past 365 days has helped me cultivate a new outlook on life, where I don't see setbacks as obstacles or barriers to my success, but as little stories to journal and laugh about when I inevitably overcome them. If that isn't the most it girl attitude to have, then I don't know what else is!

Journaling changed my life, and I hope that it can change yours too! Happy 2024! 🎀

#lifeblr #girlblogging #journal #journalling #girlblogger #becoming that girl #that girl #it girl #self improvement #new year new me #new year new you #goal setting

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silentcryracha · 9 months

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Hey 🌷 so I was absolutely smitten over the Hyunjin Baby fever series and would like to request some headcanons for all skz as new dads 😩

Hi love <3 Thank you so much for reading! Apparently a lot of people got a soft spot for that 'series', and it makes me so happy lol

Of course, dad! skz coming right up!

warnings: afab reader, term wife is used, mention of pregnancy, mention of pain and giving birth (no graphic/descriptions), the gender of the babies is never specified

word count: 3.5k

masterlist

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.

Chan - From the exact moment he knew you were pregnant you became his number one priority. I mean, you already were, but things could always go south in a marriage/relationship. But he would never, ever, let things go 'south' with his kid. Absolutely not.

He was attentive and very helpful thought the whole thing, including the actual birth, to which I'm sure he would've been in the room for. He'd 100% cry as soon as he holds his baby. He probably wouldn't even try to hold in the sobs as he leans down gently to kiss your forehead, showering you with praises and love.

'You did so well, my love, you're so strong' 'I love you so much, you know it right? You were so brave, my baby' . Would also thank you for giving him such a precious gift any chance he gets.

I feel like he'd take a hiatus for a while. Of course he would've done it anyway to be at home with you and help you, but he also wanted to be present as much as possible.

I feel like while he basically needs someone to drag him away from his work generally, in this case the decision would be the easiest of his life. He could almost be scared to get sucked in his overworking and not pay enough attention to you and his child, so he'd just take both a physical and mental hiatus.

But, I do think that he would feel very inspired especially lyrically, and maybe keep tabs and notes of inspiration that he would use later on. He'd be so inspired by this new kind of love that he's feeling.

Would absolutely be the perfect dad and husband. Taking turns both day and night to change diapers, feeding, bathing, dressing, playing with the baby and so on. I can't help but imagine him constantly having to cuddle his baby :(

He would pick them up, lulling them into his arms to make them stop crying or to sleep. He'd love to just hold them and walk them around showing them new things, like looking out of the window, or some mundane action like preparing their own milk/food. That's his new best friend for sure.

He would also love, safely, to let the child either rest or play on your shared bed, with their mom and dad at each of their side to watch over them :(

He'd sing to them, play the guitar and piano for them, and generally would try so bad to get the baby to enjoy/recognize his own music and voice.

The members would become instantly the privileged uncles. And I'm pretty sure that at least two of them would be named the kid's godparents. My bets would be on Minho and Changbin. Maybe Felix.

Minho - Minho starts behaving like a father way before the baby is born. Because now, his job would be to baby you. He'd make sure that you rest as much as possible, but also try to make activities that would help you physically. Absolutely he's the one that signs you up for prenatal classes, and would make sure to not miss a single one.

He's the kind of man that would rebuild his whole life and routine just to serve you. He'd become your personal driver, shopper, cook, exercise buddy, cuddler and motivational speaker. You need something? Just say it and he'll make it happen.

Now, of course he'd be in the delivery room. Of course. Because I also would imagine that you'd feel lost without him at your side after all those months he spent with you and taking care of you. He would be freaking out inside but he'd keep it cool for you, trying to help you breathe properly, checking in with the medics to make sure that everything was going smoothly, and encouraging you a lot.

'Okay kitten, you heard the doc, right? It's 7 centimeters of dilatation, so you just gotta hang in there for a bit more.' 'I know it hurts my darling, I'm so sorry, if I could take all your pain I would'

When the time comes he'd hold your hand, or better, he'd let you squeeze it, without saying 'ah'. He'd also peek once in a while to check the situation, out of concern and curiosity, which made you scold him for embarrassing you. But he'd say that it's nothing he hasn't seen before or something like that lol

Lee Minho never cries. But not even he could resist getting chocked up when he first heard his baby's cries. He watched quietly as the nurses brought it to your chest, caressing your hair gently and kissing your head and temple while he quietly praised you. 'You did so well, kitten' 'You're the strongest person I know, I love you so much'

The silent tears that he kept hidden at the beginning, couldn't be saved anymore the first time that he actually held his baby in his arms. You knew better than tease him in such a vulnerable situation, and you didn't even want to. You just watched quietly with a tired smile as he had his own little moment with his newborn baby.

He'd also be the perfect husband/dad. Everything was split 50/50 and even 70/30 for all he cared. He was always down to do whatever needed to be done, both around the house or with the baby itself.

Minho is not someone who usually expresses his feelings openly, which is why I feel like small moments of bonding with just him and his baby would be fundamental for him. He'd sing to them, play with them, take some walks with that chest carrier for babies. Yes, he'd love to bring them with him on his fishing, camping adventures. He'd bring them to the beach, around the city and so on.

Of course he'd love to spend time together as a family, especially knowing that you wouldn't have judged him for handling things as he saw fit. You'd organize movie nights, picnics, aquarium dates and so on, as a little family.

Changbin - The sweetest husband and daddy. So emotional too. We all know Binnie is such a sweet man and isn't afraid of showing this softer side, but he doesn't go as far as crying. Seeing Changbin cry isn't an easy occurrence, but you bet this man WILL be bawling his eyes out in the most important moments of his life.

From the time in which you confessed that you were expecting, to the first ultrasound scan, to the first time he noticed your belly showing, the first time he felt the baby kick. It was like putting down small green flags at each step.

His number one priority was your and his baby's health. He'd make sure that you're as comfortable and peaceful as possible during the pregnancy, and wouldn't hold back on expenses either. You'd have the best food, best maternity clothes, best doctors, baby supplies and essentials and so on.

He'd talk to your belly all the time. Sing to it, rap to it. You'd swear that the baby's first word out of the womb would be the whole Thunderous intro mentioning his name. Binnie would be obsessed with the idea of teaching them to rap, for real.

He's the type that would act all brave big and strong but would lowkey faint in the delivery room just from the though of pain. Yours, of course. Of course he'd be there to hold your hand, giving you kisses on the head and caressing your hair, offering words of comfort and encouragement but God forbid if he even as much gazed south to your belly.

Absolutely bawled shamelessly when he heard the first cry, and was so so gentle while holding them for the first time :( He was lowkey afraid of hurting them because his baby is SO tiny :( He'd keep repeating it like a mantra, ' They're so small, how can they be this small?' :')

Changbin wouldn't let you lift a finger, for anything that didn't specifically require your attention, like breastfeeding for example. That would be his way to bond with the baby too. Quality time with daddy Binnie since the start aw :(

He'd love to show his baby off. Like literally. 'They got their looks from us, that's why they're stunning' 'This Dolce & Gabbana jacket would look so cool with the Celine cap and the Gucci shoes wouldn't it?' 'Did you see how they looked at me? They already understand so much, my little genious' . Would absolutely be his mini me, doesn't matter if it's male or female.

Hyunjin - As soon as he heard the news, he was over the moon. Truly. And even more because I imagine that you and him were actually trying for one. He seems like the person who likes to do things in steps, or 'traditionally' if you will. So of course there was the dating, then marriage and then babies.

I also don't feel like he'd settle down too early or when he's still got an active and busy schedule like the one of a young idol. I imagine him still working but being comfortable enough to take some time off to focus on his family.

I feel like he'd take care of you well during the pregnancy, but aside from that his priority would be creating as much memories as possible, hopefully to show your children one day. He's the type of husband who would organize maternity photoshoots, both for you as a solo and with his 'little family', or paint on your belly, take SO many candid pictures.

He'd love to make you as relaxed as possible. He'd run you baths with bubbles and oils and candles, cook whatever you wanted for you, massage you when you were sore, spread creams and oils on your belly to keep the skin hydrated and soft. He'd pamper you, okay? You were about to give him the best gift of his life, you were about to make him a father. He worshipped you.

In the delivery room he'd definitely have to distract himself to not get too anxious, to be strong for you. Otherwise if he actually let any of the ugly and painful reality of it sink in his mind he would've not managed to be calm, and therefore he would've made you anxious too. He did feel like throwing up a few times from the anxiety of hearing you in pain, the doctors talking, and overall the ugly situation.

So instead he just focused on you, holding your hands, kissing them, kissing everywhere he could reach and would be comfortable to you. He'd also repeat til nausea how much he loved you, how strong you are, how amazing and magical you are, how you're going to be the best mother, and how lucky he was to be by your side.

He'd absolutely get ten times more relieved as soon as he hears the cries, because the worst part is over. But would actually get emotional only when you manage to have an intimate moment within you three. He'd fall in love instantly, feeling such a strong sense of responsibility and affection that he hasn't felt before. He would also bond with the baby by spending quality time with them, walking them around, taking care of them, playing instruments and singing for them. He'd absolutely encourage them to draw and paint, and would save every single Picasso style artwork (lol).

Jisung - Han is an anxious person who loves a lot. Which of course will influence his mood and behavior in such a situation. Regardless of the type of relationship that you have, married or not, for how long etc... when you tell him you're pregnant he'd almost have a heart attack. There's no other way to say it to be honest. He could be (and probably would) the happiest man on earth but could as quickly let his brain overthink, killing a little of his enthusiasm.

Mainly because he'd start questioning himself. 'Will I be a good father?' 'Am I mature enough?' 'Will I be able to care for them as best as I can?' and stuff like that. You'd eventually calm him down, so he'd just focus on starting to 'practice' by taking care of you. Whatever you need, you have it.

For the love of God don't let one of those hormonal crisis go around him or he'll just panic. You keep telling him that you can't quite control it and that he didn't do anything wrong but for some reason he'd just blame himself regardless and feel guilty. But he would truly be the best at taking care of you, and you'd make sure to remind him and thank him for it every chance you get, because he need to hear it.

In the delivery room, he's the kind of man who gaslighted himself on being mentally prepared but at your first hiss of pain he feels his legs go jelly. You'd probably have to calm him down and tell him to focus on you because one of y'all needs to make it out alive anyway lol. So he tried really hard, to the cost of going on autopilot and dissociate for the whole thing, but he pulls through.

Would absolutely need to sit down when he finally has the confirmation that both you and the baby are fine, otherwise he'd fall to his knees. Then he'd calm down, telling himself that he needs to be calm and strong for his baby. 'If I'm nervous he'll feel it and cry' 'Is this shirt too rough?' 'What if I hold them wrong?'

And once again you'd have to guide him through it and reassure him. 'See? They love you already. You don't have to worry, baby. Everything will come naturally' , you'd say as Jisung hold his child in his arms gently and sheds a few tears.

After the first few experiences he'd get the hang of it so he'd be way more calm and confident. The only things that would make him panic are the 'unexpected' things. Are they hungry? In pain? Is it the air in the belly? and all that. I feel like he'd never get rid of it truly.

But he would spend as much time as he can with the baby, taking small steps. For example, he'd start by hanging out with them while they're in the cradle, then on the (protected) bed, then on a soft rug and so on. He'd love to sing and play for them, and try to get them to watch his childhood cartoons and anime so that he could grow up with his same core memories.

Felix - A ball of sunshine that was gonna have another small ball of sunshine in 9 months. Of course he was beaming at the news, getting emotional and everything. He'd be the type to organize a whole list of creative ways to tell your loved ones the news and then shamelessly film their reactions.

He'd be your source of comfort and support thought the whole duration of the pregnancy and beyond that. Felix would take such good care of you, only letting you do whatever you felt like doing, not pressuring you on maintaining routines or stress you out at all.

His social media would immediately turn into a baby fever/daddy/family type of content, and he'd probably would try out some funny or sweet things. But he'd also get a lot of useful content, about pregnancy advice, facts and scientific informations and even some practical and medical videos.

By the time it's actually the time for you to give birth he'd be really excited but also quite stressed out, mainly by seeing you in pain and worrying about the baby's health even though (probably and hopefully) the doctors assured you both multiple times that they're fine. He'd hold your hand and support you through it but I feel like he wouldn't be able to look further, may even sob a little but desperately try to hide it.

Would definitely cry in your shoulder and hug you when it's over. But then he'd have the biggest sweetest smile on his face as he holds his baby for the first time. Would spend a lot of time with them and try out all the advice he gathered in the preparation months. To him it would be super important to make sure that he creates a strong bond with them.

Definitely the type of dad to take a shit ton of pictures and post them everywhere, not to show off but genuinely to share the immense joy that his little one brought him :(. Would probably make so many posts both with you alone, thanking you for this gift that you gave him and to tell you how much he loved you, and with you, him and the baby as a happy family.

Seungmin - Would be overwhelmed. He gives off a similar vibe to Jisung I think, in the sense that he'd feel a lot of pressure on his shoulders to be the best father for his child. He'd be extremely happy (and emotional, you can't tell me that he wouldn't fold and cry at the news) but also super nervous :(

Seungmin is another one of those who'd take it as a job to basically learn everything that he can before the time comes. How to take care of a baby, of you during the pregnancy, how to be a good father in general.

Like, one day you could be just chilling and he'd go 'You know that garlic can help cure fevers?' and you'd just look at him confused, 'Okay? Why are you telling me this now?' 'I mean I imagine sooner or later the baby will catch a cold'. The baby in question literally still being in your belly lol

He'd also be really attentive and do everything around the house, no questions asked. Not that he wouldn't do them normally, but of course he wouldn't want you getting fatigued. He's not the best on the emotional side of things but he'd try really hard to support you (and himself) through it.

In the delivery room I feel like the adrenaline and extreme pressure would make him act way cooler on the outside than he would be feeling. He'd be really grounded and so good at also keeping you sane and spur you on, encouraging you. As soon as he'd hear the first cry he would be almost in shock, struggling to believe that his child was just born, but probably allow a couple of tears only in private afterwards. He'd be the type to be super formal and thank the doctors for their work lol

As a new dad Seungmin would have to learn how to let himself be vulnerable sometimes. Not because he'd a cold person, the opposite. But because he seems like the person who'd want to be strong and balanced in the eyes of other people AND for his loved ones, so you'd have to help him with it. But in general he'd be the perfect husband, super helpful and willing to do what needs to be done. He'd like to play and hold the baby a lot, probably sing him lullabies too.

Jeongin - He'd a hundred percent a green flag, change my mind. That babysitting video just showed to me how good he'd actually be and how happy he could be. Jeongin would be overjoyed at the news, mostly because he's also another one of those who looks like the type that if he had a kid, it's only because he'd be actively looking for it. Otherwise he doesn't seem the risky/irresponsible type at all.

He has experience with a younger sibling so he wouldn't be totally oblivious to how to take care of a baby, which would make him way more confident and let him enjoy his happiness more. I feel like the happiness and excitement would overshadow any self doubt. Would announce the news quite privately and probably be careful for the first months, as people usually do.

Jeongin would do so so well I feel, both during and after the pregnancy. He'd take care of you, do chores, help to take care of your body, lighten your mood if you needed it and so on. In the delivery room his job would be to reassure you and calm you down. He'd probably be sick with the adrenaline of the moment but wouldn't let it affect him on the outside.

I don't see him as the type who cries easily, but I think that he would tear up as he hold his child for the first time. He'd be all smiles and giggles constantly, holding the baby and rocking them in his arms while he sings softly to them. He's another one who'd be big on play time, but would also just genuinely enjoy taking care of them. Like giving them baths, feeding them, dressing them up, would bring him such joy.

He'd be the silly type of dad that would buy funny toys and onesies for their child but also like to play with them like little dolls to dress up. That baby would have so many unique and high fashion items and accessories, I just know.

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.

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illdowhatiwantthanks · 5 days

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Don't Lie to Me

Emily Prentiss x fem!reader Warnings: life-threatening situations including a bomb and a Branch Davidians-style cult compound, established relationship, hurt/comfort, explicit language, slight emetophobia warning (nothing graphic) Word Count: 2.8k

Summary: You thought Emily was just going out on a typical case until you heard about the standoff at the religious compound. You knew her job was dangerous, but this is a whole new level of terrifying. And you can do nothing but wait. Takes place during S4.E3.

Emily stabbed at the last bit of scrambled egg on her plate and pointed it at you.

"I'd bet my life those kids are being abused," she said, chewing.

You took her plate to the sink, washing up from the early breakfast you'd made to send Emily off on a new case.

"I mean, isn't that kind of the whole point of cults?" you asked, scrubbing at the plates.

"It certainly seems like it." Emily walked over and placed an arm at the small of your back. "Thank you for breakfast. Do you need any help cleaning up?"

"No, I'm okay." You liked the repetitive nature of dishwashing. "You know," you thought out loud, "I was in a cult once."

Emily froze and stared at you, blazer halfway on. "What!?"

"Not that kind of cult. And I got out pretty quick. But... I did believe a lot of crazy things, and I was asked to do some illegal shit."

"Y/N, what!?" she said, slinging her go-bag over her shoulder, reluctant to leave. "What kind of crazy things?"

"Oh, I don't know," you said, drying your hands. "I carried anointing oil around for a while. And I thought shadows in corners were demons. Turns out that's just how light works."

Emily placed her hands on your shoulders, a slightly stunned expression on her face. "I have to go, but we will pick this up later because, Y/N, what!? A cult!?" She shook her head and kissed you, then once again on the forehead for good measure.

"It was just a little cult!" you joked, as she walked toward the door. "It's way easier to get dragged in than you'd think. I consider myself a pretty smart person, and even I fell for some of that bullshit."

"Mmkay," she said, leaning in the doorway. "Well, I'll do my best not to join a cult this week, but no promises."

You rolled your eyes at her. "I love you, Em. Be safe."

"Love you too, honey," she said. "See you in a few days."

You shook your head as the door shut behind her. You didn't tell many people about your "cult year," as you liked to call it, because it hadn't been nearly as extreme as most cults were and because you'd gotten out quickly. But, god, you'd believed in some stupid things. The confluence of moving to a new place, developing a severe mental illness, and falling wildly in love with the girl who was second in command had been a perfect recipe for cultish devotion. No matter. You'd made it out. And, well, fool me twice...

______________________________________________________________

Part of the beauty of working from home is that you could do whatever you wanted most of the day–no pants, no bra, watching the news or TV during lunch, calling Emily whenever you wanted.

You made yourself a sandwich and sat on the couch, turning on the news so that you could fiddle around with your laptop but still have some background noise.

You were scrolling through an article on the best laundry detergents when the reporter mentioned something about La Plata County. You glanced up and turned up the volume. Wasn't that where Emily and Spencer were?

"What is reportedly being called a routine questions and answers meeting by Colorado Child Services has turned into a violent and deadly standoff between Colorado authorities and a fringe religious group known as the Separatarian Sect. The raid on the compound..."

Your heart started to pound. Maybe you'd gotten the name of the county wrong, and Emily wasn't even close. But she had said she was visiting a religious compound and that she was going with Children's Services...

Breathing rapidly, you pulled out your phone and called Emily. Straight to voicemail. You called her again. No answer. You tried to calm yourself down–no need to panic until you knew for sure. You sent Emily a quick text:

Hey love💕 You haven't been forced into a Waco situation have you? The news is going CRAZY. Please text or call when you get a second so I know you're okay. I love you❤️

You moved your work stuff into the living room, piling it on the coffee table and keeping the volume on the news up. You felt sick to your stomach, but tried to stay calm. There was no reason to think Emily was there. Colorado was a huge state. Probably dozens of religious sects. Why would she be at that one? But the longer you went without a text or call from Emily, the more anxious you grew.

______________________________________________________________

You managed to make it about three hours before losing your goddamned mind with worry. You texted Emily again, called her again, left her an angry voicemail about how people shouldn't worry their girlfriends like this, all with no response. You'd tried Derek, too, but no luck.

Your leg bounced up and down, and you could feel tears forming at the corners of your eyes. You found one of Emily's sweatshirts in the hamper and pulled it over your shirt, balling yourself up on the couch and breathing in the scent of her. She's okay, you told yourself over and over. She's okay, she's okay, she's okay.

A breaking news alert on the TV prompted another update on the La Plata County situation. Your head shot up, and you turned the volume up, not wanting to miss a thing.

"...tactical team into a forced retreat after losing a 30-minute gun battle with sect members. Nobody knows for sure how many people are inside, but it is believed that at least three of the child service members are still trapped in the compound."

You didn't sleep that night. Not even for a moment. You sat on the couch late into the night, waiting for updates on the standoff. With each hour that passed without contact from Emily, you were more and more sure that it was her and Spencer in the compound. You'd tried calling a few more times, but the calls seemed pointless, knowing where she was. You'd waited until a decent hour the next morning to call other team members again–Derek, Penelope, JJ. No one had answered, and you'd only grown more terrified. You were scared to know for sure, but you needed to.

You looked down at your phone and took a deep breath, looking at the one number you'd resisted calling so far: Hotch. You knew Emily'd given you his number for emergencies only, but what was this if not an emergency?

The phone dialed for a few moments before picking up.

"Hotchner."

"Where is she!?" you demanded, all the emotion and fear you'd been putting off for the last day rushing to the forefront.

"Y/N," he sighed, and you could tell just by his voice. "She's–"

"Don't lie to me, Hotch! She's in that compound, isn't she?"

Hotch's words were calm, determined. "We're gonna get her out."

"Don't lie to me." Your voice shook, tears slipping down your face.

"Y/N, I swear to you, I will get her out."

"Okay," you whispered, feeling small and scared.

"I'll call as soon as I can to let you know she's okay, but it's gonna take some time."

"Thank you." You dashed tears from your eyes, sniffling.

"Of course."

The line clicked off and you sat in stunned silence for a few minutes, watching the repeated footage of the compound flash by on the TV. Emily was in there. Emily was in there. And there wasn't a damn thing you could do about it.

You paced back and forth for a while, waiting and waiting for news updates, then decided that all this waiting was futile. If Emily couldn't get home to you, you'd go to her. You booked yourself on the next flight to Durango, packed just the essentials, and ran out the door, filling Sergio's bowl and making a mental note to text a friend to check in on him if you were gone for more than a day or two.

______________________________________________________________

The hours you were in the air–with nothing but shitty airplane WiFi service–were the worst for you. You refreshed the live news page over and over again, terrified that at any moment, you'd hear news of a mass death.

When you finally got to Durango that night, you drove the rental car as close to the compound as you could, but ATF had it locked down for miles. For now, this was a close to Emily as you could get.

You booked a nearby hotel and, still wrapped in Emily's sweatshirt, sat moon-faced and bleary-eyed on the edge of the bed, watching the news, and waiting, waiting, waiting.

You'd nearly drifted off to sleep when the room filled with a blinding white-orange light. Your eyes grew wide as you watched the screen. The compound went up in flames, debris flying far and wide.

"Oh my god," you said, covering your mouth. "Oh my god."

You ran to the bathroom and vomited, then sat on the cool floor, shaking. You coughed as you hyperventilated, unable to get enough air into your lungs. You wrapped your hands around your head, rocking. There was no way. No way someone would have survived an explosion like that.

You felt like your heart was being ripped apart. It was the hope that hurt the most. The maybe she hadn't been in there? But almost certainly she was. Maybe she was okay? But probably she wasn't. Most likely, she didn't even exist anymore, had gone up in smoke with the rest of the compound, the thought of which made you vomit again. You couldn't fathom it, couldn't envision a world without Emily. You needed her. You hunched on the floor of the hotel room, leaning into the bed, and waited. Waited for news of Emily's death. You hoped that Hotch would call you first. It'd be so much easier to hear it from him, but the reporters were like vultures, and they often got the news first.

______________________________________________________________

At the compound, a deeply battered Emily, now running out of adrenaline, leaned heavily on Hotch as he walked her to an ambulance.

"You don't have to come with me," she told him, her voice gravelly. "It's not that bad."

"Prentiss, you can barely walk," Hotch protested, watching in concern as she winced climbing into the ambulance. "I wish you'd get on a stretcher."

"I am on a stretcher." Emily gave him a little wave from where she now lay, an EMT strapping her in and taking her vitals.

"I meant before now." Hotch smiled slightly. His team was beat up, but they'd be okay.

He pulled out his phone, scrolling through his contacts. "You need to make a call," he told Emily, putting the phone on speaker as it dialed.

"Oh, god," Emily groaned. "She's gotta be worried sick."

When you picked up, your voice was timid, rough with emotion.

"Hotch?" you whispered, terrified of what he might tell you.

"Hi, honey," Emily said, her voice heavy with love and exhaustion. It hit her, all of a sudden, that there was a good chance she might not have made it out. That she would never have seen you again. The thought brought tears to her eyes.

"Em!" you cried between sobs. "Are you okay!? Are you hurt!?"

"I'm a little banged up, but I'll make it."

"You scared the shit out of me!" you yelled, equal parts furious at her for putting her life in danger and relieved that she was okay. Emotions tumbled through your body like ocean waves.

Emily smiled and wiped a few tears from under her eyes. "I know. I'm sorry."

"Is Spencer there? Is he okay, too?"

Emily exhaled shakily. "Yeah, he's fine. We're all fine."

"Where are you?"

"Uh, in an ambulance."

"Which hospital are they taking you to?" you asked, pulling on your shoes and grabbing your keys off the hotel desk.

"Mercy?" Emily said, repeating what the EMT told her.

"I'll meet you there."

"No, honey, you don't need to come all the way here," Emily protested. "I'm okay. I'll be home in a few days."

"I'm already here, Em. Don't even try to fight me on this."

"You're here!? In Colorado?!"

"At a hotel. As close to the compound as I could get."

"You came?" Emily confirmed, her voice quiet, like she couldn't quite believe someone would love her enough to be there.

"Emily," you breathed. "Of course I did."

A few tears escaped Emily's eyes, and Hotch looked away.

"Now," you said, clearing your throat and trying to pull yourself together. "Please, please, let the doctors take care of you. I'll be there soon, okay?"

"Okay," she sniffled.

"I love you."

"I love you, too," Emily said, before hanging up and handing the phone back to Hotch.

The EMT handed her a paper towel to use as a tissue and she laughed, dabbing at her eyes and nose. "Thanks," she said.

Hotch smiled, watching her.

"What?" she said.

"She really loves you."

"I know."

______________________________________________________________

At the hospital, Emily heard you before she saw you. You were the first thing she heard after waking up from surgery, and she couldn't help but smile. You were giving the nurses a run for their money, which was saying something. You were usually so patient, so accommodating. Not today.

"Look," you railed at the nurse's station. "I've been in the waiting room for hours! I have been awake for three days straight, and my girlfriend has been a cult hostage that whole time! I am not in the mood to be held hostage too! Take me to her now, or I swear to god I will get the fucking FBI director on the line."

Emily's face brightened when you came in the room, but yours fell. She looked awful. Her face was bruised and swollen, bandages covered her body, and her arm was in a cast.

"Oh, Em," you said, your voice breaking, as you grabbed her hand, pressing your palm gently to her cheek.

"I'm okay." But she wasn't, and you could tell.

"It's okay, baby," you reassured her, running your fingers gently through her hair. "You don't have to be okay now, alright? I'm here. I'm here to take care of you."

Her breath hitched, and you could tell she was fighting off tears. It broke your heart. She always felt like she needed to be strong. It was time to let someone else be strong for a change.

You lowered the railing of the hospital bed, and lifted yourself in, gently pulling Emily into you. She grasped desperately at your shirt and fought off sobs.

"Shh," you whispered, cradling her head. "Let it out, love. I'm right here. You're safe now."

You held her while she cried, heartbroken that she'd been so scared and so hurt and, yet, proud that she handled it like no one else in the world could. And for neither the first time nor the last, you felt the immense weight and honor of being someone Emily Prentiss felt safe enough to break down with.

When she quieted, you rocked her and held her and placed small, gentle kisses on her head, trying to convey all your love for her, all your protectiveness toward her through osmosis.

You remembered, quite suddenly, the last conversation you'd had before Emily left, about cults.

"I told you," you whispered, giggling.

"Told me what?"

"That it was easy to get dragged into a cult."

"That is not the same," Emily argued, playfully shoving you. "I was held hostage. You were just dumb."

"Ouch."

"You didn't hoard weapons or anything, did you?"

"No," you scoffed. "Of course not."

"Well, what'd you do?" she pressed.

"What do you mean?"

"You said you did some illegal shit in the cult, so what did you do?"

"Oh," you laughed. "Nothing too serious. We bugged some people's rooms, recorded conversations."

"...Why?"

"We thought they were in cahoots with the devil."

Emily laughed, then grabbed her ribs, wincing. "'Cahoots with the devil!?' God, I'm so glad I found you after your religious days."

"What can I say? You get the very best of me."

Emily beamed up at you, pulling you down by your collar to kiss you. You stayed gentle and soft, mindful of her split lip and bruised face.

You held your forehead to hers, breathing in her scent. That familiar Emily scent that you'd been so sure you'd never get again.

"Don't ever scare me like that again," you whispered.

"I won't," Emily said, burying her face in your chest.

"Don't lie to me."

You felt her smile into your skin. "I'll try."

You sighed and grinned. "I guess that'll do. But only because I love you so much."

#emily prentiss #emily prentiss x reader #emily prentiss x fem!reader #criminal minds #criminal minds fanfic #emily prentiss fanfic #emily prentiss one shot #emily prentiss drabble

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saturnianautist · 1 year

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🍯Astro Notes pt. 11🍯

.・゜゜・　　・゜゜・．.・゜゜・　　・゜゜・

Disclaimer: I am not a professional astrologer these are just my opinions and notes based on my own research and what I noticed from my surrounding and who I know.

Ps. (Currently working on getting a master list together so it’s easier for you guys to find things as I start adding more posts. Hope you enjoy <33

🍯 Placements under the same planetary rulership tend to either get along really well like best friends or just come into contact with each other many times in their lives. Also possible that they annoy each other but often only if their are harsh aspects so always check for those. For example: me and my sister both have prominent mercurial signs Gemini and Virgo and are like best friends, same thing with my mother and her best friend but with Venus ruled signs libra and Taurus. It’s just a friendship where you’ll be on the same page a lot of the time.

🍯 Earth signs in general love their comfort but Taurus moons bruh just don’t mess with their comfort or their self care routines they will look at you like you just killed their dog.

🍯 Fire signs are so heavy handed it’s crazy they’ll breath and everything around them will break or fall in some way 😭

🍯 Cancer placement stereotypes needa stop lmao bc they are not the cute mom friend, maybe at times but y’all can low key be maniacal. Remember that cancer is ruled by the moon and one side of the moon is dark at all times. They have this hidden side and people forget they have a duality to them like other signs. When underdeveloped as a person emotionally, this side comes out in an ugly way (when developed it comes out more as they just have a lot more depth to them as a person than you’d think like scorpios almost in a way). Tbh I think underdeveloped cancers are more two faced then underdeveloped Geminis.

🍯 The cancer placements I’ve met also can’t take anything seriously lmao like you’ll injure yourself and sometimes they be the first to laugh at you and pull they phone out and then finally help you after when u don’t need it anymore (I should specify again that this isn’t all of you just the underdeveloped ones).

🍯 A cancer mercury with a Gemini Venus makes someone very quick witted with there jokes and have a comeback for literally everything, especially if theirs also a Virgo placement thrown in their too (the sense of humor will be god level if there’s a sag placement as well, quadruple homocide) This person has the power to hurt your feelings if they wanted too but if they are more mature they won’t spend that energy on you most of the time.

🍯 Pluto and moon in the 11th house together is tough. Having Pluto here can already be difficult with the constant transformational energy in house of friendships/community, but having your moon in this house at the same time makes it even harder. Think about it, your moon is relying on building these kind of connections and forming these close knit bonds with people to feel emotionally fulfilled but then Pluto is constantly taking people in and out of your life or showing you who wasn’t your true friend. Sometimes it also looks like constantly outgrowing your friends, especially if you have any other Pluto or 8th house energy in your chart. This can also look like you causing transformations or shifts and awareness in other people but in my experience they don’t listen even after being aware until it’s too late (a lot of people will want you to do the work for them as this placement can attract a lot of energy vampires). As tough as this is, it’s almost always a blessing in disguise. You will start forming your true inner circle later on in life with better boundaries and knowing what to look for in healthy friendships with people who wanna grow with you.

🍯 If you meet a Taurus when they are developed, they are some of the most solid have your back friends, but underdeveloped they can actually be the opposite, unreliable.

🍯 A lot of people talk about Pluto, Scorpio and 8th house energy being transformational which it is, but another placement I don’t see as often mentioned is Sagittarius and Jupiter energy. Pluto is transformational energy itself, but Jupiter is the planet of expansion and growth. Its ever growing, which means it’s energy in a chart can make a lot of shifts to a persons life, and them as a person. All of the people with dominant Jupiter or Sag that I know have gone through some big hardships where it caused them to hit rock bottom, and the only place they could go was up. These people have also moved around a lot growing up.

🍯 All of the autistic people i know in real life including myself have dominant earth placements and then a fire placement or two (not a diagnosis just something I noticed). This kind of makes sense to me to those of us who can be really blunt and come off rude/stuck up to others who don’t know us.

🍯 Wherever your Saturn lies will tell you what you have to wait for till later in life to start seeing your blessings in. Remember that Saturn restricts things wherever it touches. For example: Saturn in the 6th house (6th house= daily activities/routine and health) might take a while to find the right daily routine for them especially with finding a balance between their self care and their responsibilities (6 also partly has to due with balance In numerology). They could also take a while to figure out what way of eating for them works. I have this placement and used to struggle eating enough and having an appetite. It took me a while to learn what portions and how often was best for me and how to plan out my day better in order to eat more like working out so I get hungry and meal prepping. It also took me a while to just figure out the best way I’m productive in the day which was flexible structure.

💛💛Thank you for reading to everyone who made it to the end! I also wanted to say I appreciate everyone who took the time to read through my first post the other day and I hope that everyone enjoyed this one just as much.💛💛

#astro observations #astro notes #astrology #zodiac #zodiac signs

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wheresmymilliondollarman · 1 year

Note

THE AARON WARNER X READER FIC OMLLLLLLLL I NEED PT. 2 PLEASEEE

aaron warner x ferrars!reader pt. 2

aaron warner continues to make way into your life, and it's only a matter of time before you grow fond of him too.

(taken place during unravel me)

continuation of the hcs from this piece!

a/n: hey y'all.... the long awaited pt 2 is finally here. so sorry for the wait, but i had some major writer's block with this at first, and tbh life has been a lil hectic rn with classes n stuff, so thank you for all the love and support on the first headcannons, and thank you for being patient with me! i truly cant express enough how happy i get when you guys compliment my work <3 as usual, hayden is my personal fc, imagine who you like !

side note: i know reader might seem kind of useless at times even tho she has powers, but it's because she doesn't have a full control of her ability yet, still learning how far it goes, and she doesn't have much practice on defensive uses of it, since a lot of her training is about learning about her powers. hope that makes sense LOL. some big events are going to be briefed over bc i didnt wanna bore y’all with stuff you alr read in the book and wanna focus on warner & reader interactions👍

word count: 8.2k

warnings: some plot changes, vague taylor swift reference, mentions of injuries and blood, some violence

after receiving the note, you immediately crumped it and stuffed it into a random drawer with your clothing. you hadn't told a soul about the message, you feared it would only make the implication of meeting warner again true.

thinking about the note was a pipeline to thinking about aaron warner. thinking about him meant flashing back to the last moment the two of you shared.

his lips on yours, his confessions of his infatuation, and of course, the way your shot him in the chest. you hated how the memory was brung a warm and unfamiliar feeling in your chest, especially thinking back to the kiss.

you told yourself it wasn't a big deal. maybe another member at the base decided to play a prank on you, or perhaps it was just an empty threat. there was no way warner knew your location, so there's no need to tell anyone about the silly note.

but to be extra cautious, you laid off going on missions to the outside for a little bit. plus, it forced juliette to interact with people that weren't you on missions when you weren't there.

you went along with your routine as usual, training with castle and kenji, and hanging out with juliette and adam.

you didn't hate castle by any means, but you find his underlying scrutinization of both you and your sister at times to be bothersome. his constant pushy treatment to juliette never sat right with you either, but since he was the leader of omega point - you knew you had to still show respect for him.

although, you started to notice a strain between the couple recently, mostly from adam's side. there was obviously something he was keeping from juliette.

you comforted your sister to the best of your ability, but you knew not knowing was starting to affect her. kenji also seemed to know whatever this secret was, but was adamant on keeping his lips shut.

however, once castle took adam away in the middle of you guys eating lunch, juliette demanded answers since it was obvious adam himself was struggling to reveal it himself.

this time kenji was helpful and guided you and juliette to the research labs. there you both saw castle engaging adam in some sort of tests, and it sent your sister into a fit of rage, mainly aimed at castle. which then resulted in her angrily punch the ground, causing for a large earthquake that shook the entire establishment.

juliette was passed out for three days before waking up. you worried for her endlessly during those days, it was the one of the only times you intentionally listened for her thoughts, to ensure she was alright, but it was scarily silent. you knew adam also was quite worried for juliette, but castle made sure he kept his distance.

after that, her and adam were on some sort of unofficial break up, and you knew better than to get involved. juliette was also now required to join you and kenji in training, which made for a chaotic, but fun trio.

your powers were getting easier to control, you were working on levitating heavier objects every time. you've practiced mental manipulation on insects and small animals, so you had a gist of to what extent you could control a mind. the most you've done so far was send simple commands like jump, sit, move, etc. kenji always offered to be a test subject for this, but you always declined, not liking the thought of possibly controlling the mind of your friend.

now that you could control when to apprehend thoughts, it made it much easier to make friends without disrespecting people's privacy. while sara and sonya were always kind to you, others had made it sort of clear they wanted to keep their distance to prevent their mind from being read by you. being able to now reassure others that their thoughts weren't being heard made it easier for people to approach you.

much like juliette you found new friends in brendan, with an electric ability, and winston, who had a stretchy ability and also designed the suits for both ferrars.

days at omega point were serene for a bit, everyone following routine and members continuing to patrol areas for any threats of the reestablishment. but it was surely disrupted with the arrival of threatening news.

it was in the middle of the night when you were dragged away from your bed by kenji to castle's office; juliette and adam following suite. he claimed it was an urgent matter that required the presence of the four of you.

there, castle revealed the return of the supreme commander, also known as warner's father - that was big news to you and juliette. it explains how warner was able to be out with his men in the sector so often.

however, news worsened when you found out brendan and winston along with emory and ian were taken by the reestablishment during their patrol. at their missing location was left a note, with specific instructions on how to proceed.

you were shaken by this discovery, it had been only less than 24 hours since you had last spoken with either of them, both you and juliette had had breakfast with brendan and winston.

that wasn't even the end of if, castle instructed that all four of you were to go to this meeting destination.

all of you were taken aback by this, you had initially assumed castle would be the one to see the supreme, since has is the leader and all.

adam and kenji were at the head of the protest against this plan, not wanting to easily comply . both you and juliette remained silent, still taking in all the information given.

you without a doubt were ready to head in for the safety of your friends, but you also didn't like the unpredictability of the situation you all could possibly wander into with the commander.

"the two of you may opt out as you like, but i am requesting the aid of both ferrars, seeing as they are the ones very explicitly instructed to see the supreme - a sort of exchange, them for the hostages. "

again, everyone in the room was stunned with confusion. all having the same question, why would he need both sisters there?

you didn't know the room could've possibly erupted into more chaos than right now. adam was now furious, kenji not too far behind with questions of his own.

you couldn't help but think back to the note you found in your pocket, "see you soon." is this what he had meant? had he known this would occur that long ago?

again, you shook the thought from your mind. aaron warner wasn't the one who sent the order, it was the supreme, so it's possible warner will not even be at the location the four of you are suppose to go to.

no need to think about warner, you told yourself. no need to remember how he kissed you with ferocious passionate intent.

with this newfound knowledge, you knew you couldn't back away from this, not when there were lives at stake, and you didn't have to be familiar with the supreme to know he would not hesitate to take the lives of omega point members.

you looked toward juliette to inquire her thoughts about the situation. you understood from the look on her face that she had a similar plan of action to you. a telepathic (without actually reading her mind this time) message was communicated between both of you, making a mutual agreement.

"we'll do it." you announced over the arguing.

castle was pleased with this decision, but immediately adam objected, and even kenji was hesitant for you both to go through with the plan. however, stubborn as ever, both of you committed to your decision.

preparing for the meeting with warner's father was nerve-racking, worried for the safety of your team, and also the hostages. you and everyone knew this had to be some sort of trap set up by the commander, but there wasn't much you could do besides arm yourself and comply.

the four of you were gathered in castle's office. castle made sure all four of you were equipped with necessary gear for the mission, including having weapons with you.

you attire was the same as usual, a red leather corset-styled top, a matching leather coat-like jacket, black pants in a stretchy material, accompanied with black fingerless gloves and black knee-high boots - except now you had the addition of a harness and holsters up your leg to hold any firearms given to you. the coat did well in concealing a lot of the guns.

luckily, you had a good amount of practice with a gun since the warner incident. you were no james bond, as a man kenji liked to reference, but you had enough skill to defend yourself and others in the face of danger.

"why does warner's father need both sisters?" kenji humorously asked castle, "can't we at least keep one of them, one for the reestablishment and one for omega point."

you scoffed with a grin, entertaining the joke. "i'm sorry, who exactly are you willing to sacrifice to the reestablishment kenji?"

"well, with that attitude i'm starting to lean towards you."

castle goes through the plan once more before having to leave with the rest of omega point. they had to be stationed around building near the meeting point before the four of you arrived.

the time finally arrived for all of you to begin the journey to meeting the commander. since you all were traveling on foot, adam and kenji leading the way, you needed to leave at least an hour before the designated time.

adam was able to successfully turn off his protective shield for kenji to make all of you invisible. it made the journey easier; being able to wander through the land unseen.

after kenji misguided you to the wrong house, you all rushed to get to the correct address, 1542 sycamore. with 50 seconds of time, you all arrived.

juliette made the quick decision to tell kenji and adam to stay hidden, that it was better if warner's dad thought we were alone. in the case of an emergency, they could jump in.

kenji and adam gave a few last words of reassurance, before turning back invisible. then, you and juliette stood in front of the door of meeting house, holding hands before entering the house.

warner's dad did the job of opening the door for you both, inviting you inside even though it was more a of demand, and commenting on your impeccable timing.

once inside, you got a good look at the man. you shouldn't be shocked he was also quite handsome since he is warner's father, but you were still thrown back by his unexpected attractiveness.

unfortunately, you didn't take him his appearance for long before he abruptly & forcefully pushed juliette head against the wall behind her, momentarily knocking her out.

you didn't even get to process the action before you were pushed roughly against the wall, the commanders right forearm holding you down by the throat, while his left hand was disarming you.

almost as if acted on instinct, you pushed him back with a scarlet force, sending him back first onto a nearby table.

you took a second to get react, unsure of what happened, before rushing over to your sister. juliette didn't seem to be bleeding, luckily, but you figured she might have a concussion. much to your surprise, she sat up straighter attempting to act unfazed.

you were roughly yanked away by your wrist and away from juliette. you attempted a second self-defense act, but the commander was first and pulled out his gun, pointing it to your sister.

"try anything else, and i'll shoot her before you could blink."

your silence was a sign of defeat. you stood still as he unarmed you, even taking off your coat for good measure.

he released you finally then went on to do the same to juliette, who was still recovering from the slight blackout she faced from the collision with the wall - he repeated the threat to her, gun pointing in your direction this time.

you swore if you made it out of here alive you were going to learn more defensive uses of your powers to never be in a position like this again.

juliette must've been refocused on the task at hand because she starting asking the commander for the location of the hostages.

you stomach dropped when he disclosed his army is equipped and ready to take down any omega point members who are lingering by.

he went on to elaborate his plan to eliminate the "freaks" that made up the rebellion. but what got your heart beating faster was the mention of warner.

he directs his talk to you, "i admit, your sister, juliette, had piqued my interest quite a bit with her ability and history, i'd never paid much more than a glance in your direction. but what really astounded me, was when my son begged me to spare your life." he smiles, in a terrifying manor, "i just had to meet this girl whose bewitched him and spelled him into such a lovesick fool."

you felt physically stuck to your place as you listened. you didn't have to look at juliette to know she was also frozen.

'did aaron really do that?'

he turns in your direction, "i have every intention to use you to teach my son a lesson, and that will just have to include your death much to your misfortune. i really do hate to waste a pretty face." you face pales at the mention of your death.

then he faces your sister, who had taken a sudden step in front of you, "but that doesn't mean the older ferrars has to suffer the same fate and couldn't prove to be useful to join me in the capitol."

"i'd rather jump off a very steep cliff, thanks."

you wanted to laugh at your sister's retort, but you couldn't help but worry that he'd kill her for her denial. you'd rather be the sole target of his persecution than drag your sister down into it as well.

you reminded yourself adam and kenji were still around, they would surely arrive in time before either of you could be dead. you hoped.

the commander, however, does laugh at your sister's rejection, "a stubborn one you are."

"son, would you come in here, please?"

your eyes widen, warner was here this whole time.

you and juliette glanced at the same time, both being shocked at his presence.

when he appears in the doorway, all the memories of the event in his room come back to haunt you.

his face was void of any emotion, but his stare directed intensely toward you.

there was no time for small talk, because warner's father handed him a gun, meant to kill you. he places it in aaron's hand and aiming it to your head, dishing out the command to 'clean up his mess.'

you wouldn't be surprised if he had intentions to shoot you, you quite literally had shot him the last time you'd seen each other.

juliette let out yells of protests, telling warner to put the gun down.

you were preparing ways to defend yourself, mainly involving levitating an object and throwing it at either person with murderous intent toward you. but you weren't sure how you could hide the movement of your hand, and red glow of your eyes, when the attention was all on you.

but you couldn't help solely stare back into aaron's emerald green eyes. you wondered if this would be your last sight before death.

no, you refused to succumb to death like this, you wouldn't give anderson the pleasure.

you stared back into the green eyes, daring him to take a shot. this could be really courageous or terribly stupid.

then in the next instant, the gun had a new target, his father.

his father didn't look too fazed, confident that his son wouldn't shoot him, even patronizing him for it.

you didn't wait to find out if he would go through with it because now that the attention shifted, you could execute your plan of action.

the supreme and warner were both knocked down by the large heavy table being thrown at them. granted, aaron wasn't your target, but it didn't hurt to knock him down in case he intended to shoot you.

juliette took the opportunity to get the firearms the commander has taken at the beginning, and use the gun to shoot him in the leg. both legs. multiple times.

you were about to reel her back, when kenji appeared out of thin air, literally, and held juliette back from further injuring anderson.

suddenly, you remembered warner was still in the room. you looked around to find him passed out on the ground, a syringe, you guessed kenji used, next to him.

kenji tossed you as roped and told you to bound his arms, so, you knelt down on the floor next to him, carefully shifting him to place the rope.

as you did this, you noticed his features closely, how different he seemed unconscious, at peace. it kind of made him more beautiful.

out of your better judgement, you reached out slowly to touch a lock of his blonde hair, soft.

you immediately pulled your hand away when you thought you felt a stir, but you looked back to his face and he was still unconscious.

maybe, if you had looked a little closer you'd notice the ghost of a small smirk on his lips.

"we're going to take this kid hostage."

you were brought to your current situation with that statement.

"wait, what!" kidnapping wasn't on your to-do list for the day.

however, the most shocking news to be said in this room, was when adam dropped the bomb that the supreme command, warner's father, was his dad - making warner his half brother.

in the midst of all this chaos, omega point had already set off the call to attack, and now were battling against the reestablishment.

there was no time to think about events because kenji was rushing everyone out the door to get back to the safe haven.

the four of you needed to a large distraction so castle could draw back before major disaster since anderson was down and you now had taken warner. juliette promptly stepped up with an idea and create a part two of her earth-shattering ability. - which it turned out working really well because you all were able to make contact with castle.

adam and kenji did the heavy lifting of carrying aaron's heavy body while you and juliette had the task of finding a tank for the four of you to head to omega point in.

once that was settled all of you clambered into the tank, kenji taking the wheel and adam acting as second in command - that left you and juliette in the back with warner.

who was currently to the left of you, slumped against the window side of his seat, and juliette being on your right.

you weren't thrilled to have him smushed next to you. not when you were close enough to smell his cologne and feel the outline of his muscles through his jacket.

a part of you thought he would maybe wake up somewhere during the ride, but his eyes remained close. you know because you were staring at him more than you'd like to admit.

you reminded yourself what he had put you and juliette through, the asylum, the imprisonment, and the tests. it was enough to reel you back in and continue your dislike for warner.

although he was asleep, the bumps on the travel to the underground base made for a lot of jolts of movement and in turn caused warner's body to tumble onto you.

his body was heavy, but somehow it was heavier whenever you had to push him back to his side. it was like a force was trying to keep him on there.

his head somehow always slumped into the hair on the crook of your neck, and at some point, you could've sworn you felt him breathe in through his nose, like a sniff. but you wrote it off as the movement of the vehicle.

you must've passed out at a point because when you opened your eyes, you were lying against warner's shoulder.

your face was a flush of scarlet when you realized your position, but luckily juliette was fast asleep, and the two men were occupied in the front, likely going over today's events. thank god.

not long after, you all arrived at the destination and made it out of the tank.

kenji helped pull you out of the tank, not before leaving a teasing comment.

“have a nice nap, did you?”

you ignored him, but your face went red in embarrassment. he would never let you live this down.

you took a rest for a whole day before interacting with anyone. you weren't sure if you could handle any other sudden revelation without rest, especially if it involved warner.

castle came to you and juliette to discuss further the plan with warner and such. and you were reminded of the fact adam and him were technically brothers, which was kept a secret between all four of you still.

then castle gave you both the most ridiculous task; to be in charge of the questioning and occasionally visiting the prisoner. his reasoning being you both were the most acquainted with warner, and he'd be more willing to comply with at least one of you.

you wanted to decline; you didn't understand why castle always sent everyone else to do work for him - but you knew your sister was happy to finally have a real assignment for omega point; she wanted to be useful.

so the following day, you began your "mission." you sisters went to where they were holding warner, a room much like where you and juliette slept, but the difference was it closely guarded, not letting the person inside leave.

you greeted the guards, and they had looked very relieved to see you there. apparently, warner has been less than pleasant as an inmate - throwing things and demanding to speak with you, and they informed him the two of you would be arriving to calm him down.

you stepped into the room and noticed the lack of furniture, probably because he was throwing, then you saw warner sitting on a mattress on the floor, indulging himself in some sort of journal that you didn't get to get a look at before he put it away.

he looks up at your arrival with a grin, "hello amor, a pleasure to see you again at last." he scanned your attire, "i have to say, this new look on you has you looking rather ravishing."

you rolled your eyes, fighting the butterflies because of his comment. "how you manage to be a prisoner and still keep that stupid charm goes beyond me."

"i did say i'd see you soon didn't i?"

juliette gave you a confused glance, you hadn't told her about the note, nor the kiss.

you ignored what he said, trying redirect the conversation. you glanced down at his chest, "nice to see you've healed from the shot, for a moment, i thought i'd killed you."

"takes a lot more to kill me i'm afraid, however, if it's by your hand i'm more than willing to greet death like an old friend."

before you could bite back, juliette interrupted your banter with a cough, meant to serve a reminder to you to stay on task.

"right, forgot you were here juliette, perhaps you'd like to step out so your sister and could properly reunite."

god, you hated his suaveness. you hated it even more when it worked in making your heartbeat pick up.

juliette took charge of the conversation and started asking questions relevant to the establishment, but warner would either change the subject or give vague answers.

you both decided to leave after growing tired of the lack of information. you ignored warner's pleas for the company and walked out.

the next day you both tried again, meeting in from of his room. juliette, however had decided a change of tactics.

"i think you should go in without me."

you turned to her confused. she explained he would likely be more cooperative with your presence alone, his actions from yesterday proving to be in support of that.

you denied it, even if part of you believed it. you weren't sure you were ready to be in a room alone with aaron.

nonetheless, juliette left you to your own devices and rushed off, probably to find adam or kenji, before you could protest further.

you cursed her, but prepared to enter the room in front of you.

aaron was lying down, resting an arm behind his head and using the other to throw and object up and down. once he noticed you he sat up in your direction.

he noticed the lack of presence of juliette, and you could tell he was more than pleased.

"finally, i was starting to think your sister would chaperone us forever."

"don't be so eager to be alone, i could shoot you again."

"and i'd willingly take another bullet if it meant another kiss."

you couldn't help the annoying pink tint on your face that came up with the mention of the kiss.

you changed topic, "how were you able to send me that note?"

he smirked, "well for one, i noticed you after our eyes met briefly during your first time outside in the sector. after that, it was blatantly obvious who you were; that disguise did nothing to hide your gorgeous face, unfortunately for you. and then it wasn't hard to order a civilian to drop the note in your pocket while you were distracted."

you were stunned; you really hadn't thought to think he recognized you. you thought you blended in pretty well on those missions.

"okay, stop distracting me, what are your father's plans."

"hmm, maybe if you ask nicely and give me a kiss - i'd be more willing to comply."

you left shortly after that, knowing you weren't going to get much out from him.

it continued like that for a few days; you'd walk in, try to get information, but then he'd turn it back into a way to flirt with you or bring up the kiss.

this time when you walked in, you saw him reading the journal from the first day, and you were able get a better look at it. it was yours.

"hey, what are you doing with my-"

"dear diary, today i checked out a book from the library, there was a rather intimate scene between the main charact-"

you immediately recognized the writing as your own and strided across the room to aaron to snatch your journal back.

warner was quicker, standing up in a snap, keeping a distance from you as read aloud more pages.

you yelled at him to stop, catching up to him, but now he held the book to the ceiling, making it harder for you to reach because of his tall body.

you, much to your embarrassment, jumped up and down to reach the journal, wanting this humiliation to end.

"aaron, just give it back!"

all of a sudden, aaron stopped his teasing and looked down to you, a lopsided smile on his face.

"you called me aaron."

you eyes opened in horror, you just called him aaron, not warner. and he heard it.

"no. no. i said warner, you misheard." it was a terrible attempt at lying.

he smiles even wider, his dimples prominent. he reaches a free hands to lift your chin.

"please, keep saying my name, i do love how it sounds coming from you."

you felt you were gonna explode from all the emotions you were feeling, the room was getting hotter, and your heart was pounding in your ears.

you couldn't get a solid sentence our without babbling in embarrassment. so you took the coward's way - bolting out the room, abandoning the mission to retrieve your journal.

you avoided visits a few times after that incident, you were still cringing at the flashbacks, it worsened when you also remembered he had the contents of your journal and all the embarrassing things and darkest secrets you'd written inside.

unfortunately, that didn't stop you from running into warner.

you were eating lunch with kenji, he was currently explaining some princess film you'd never seen.

"wait, so how did this girl even find out when her birthday was?"

"well, obviously, mother gothel told her."

"why didn't she just lie about her birthday, or not even tell her what a birthday is?"

"i don't know, i didn't make the script."

"also does the ending mean she has power still, or was it the last of her ma-"

"oh my god, can you shut up and just appreciate the greatness that is tangled!"

"hey! you're the on-"

"well, isn't this a surprise."

you turned to the new voice that entered the conversation. aaron warner stood in front of your table, hands behind his back, and castle behind him, likely guiding him somewhere.

then you remembered your last conversation with the leader and came to the conclusion aaron was on his way to be tested, probably like adam had.

castle remained unaware of the blood shared between the two, but you did let it slip you were unable to read your mind, and he was able to make skin contact with your sister.

"well if it isn't my favorite ex-boss." kenji spoke with a mouthful of food.

aaron ignored kenji, much to kenji's offense. "amor, here have you been these days, you left quite flushed after our intimate moment in my cell."

kenji spat out his food at that last bit.

you body was filled to the brim with utter embarrassment and hate toward the way he phrased his wording to make it seem what it wasn't.

you turned to kenji who was coughing continuously, "nothing even happened!" you gave warner a glare, "stop making it seem so.. so-"

"so what, amor? i'd love to know what you think i meant by intimate."

"you are so insufferable."

castle then dragged warner along to the testing area. you couldn't deny you weren't curious to find out if he shared a gift similar to adam.

you were planning to engage with warner the next day, but his guards had come up to you during your training session demanding your presence because apparently warner was in a fit of rage.

worried, you rushed over. entering the room, warner was sitting against the wall, face in his hands. the room was in disarray, broken items of what was already so little, scattered all over the room. even his floor mattress had been tossed.

he barely acknowledged you, so you took it upon yourself to kneel down in from of him, silently asking what happened.

"castle..he told me it's possible i have an... ability. he told me i could change," he laughs humorlessly, "that there was potential for me to be.. different... possibly better."

you stayed silent, unsure of how to respond, as he bitterly ranted about his talk with castle.

"what do you think?”

“what?”

“do you believe i can change? i’d love to know what your opinion is on this, amor.”

you weren’t sure how to respond. “i believe… everyone can choose what they want to be. it’s up to them to decide, even if everyone tell tried to tell you who you are.”

this time, he was the one silent, looking down at his lap, likely in thought.

you took the chance to take in his attire; some black sweatpants, grey socks, and no shirt.

you probably would’ve been flustered to see him shirtless if you didn’t notice some peculiar marks peaking from his shoulder.

silently, you slowly crept to the side of aaron, still distracted. you slide far enough to get a good few of his back.

you internally gasped. his back was littered with lines of scarring - likely whipped. your stomach churned at the thought.

you also notice a big tattoo in the upper middle of his back, in all caps ‘IGNITE’.

you must’ve said it out loud because aaron’s head whipped in your direction. he turned his back away from you once he noticed where your stare was directed.

“no need to say anything, i already know how hideous it looks.”

unsure how to respond, you blurt the first thing out of your head - “i think they look cool. kind of like an abstract piece of art.”

yeah, comforting people wasn’t your forte.

luckily, aaron seemed intrigued by your statement. so you took the chance to request something further.

“can i touch your, erm, back?”

aaron was hesitant for a few moments, but then sighed and turns his back toward you.

you delicately pressed your fingers along the canvas of his back. you could feel every ridge and texture of each scar as your fingers glided over.

aaron flinched at first content, then progressively & visibly melted into your touch.

“why ‘ignite’?”

“why not?” you really hated his vagueness.

an idea popped into your head. you pulled a pen out of your jacket pocket, testing it on your own skin a few times before you started drawing lines on aaron’s skin.

“amor, what are you doing?”

“hang on.” he could feel the ink of the pen etched on his back.

“you know, my original plan was to seduce you with my perfect abs, but i guess luring you with my scars works as well.”

“shut up.” but you were smiling while saying it.

you finished connecting a few lines, “there, perfect.”

"i think you've forgotten i dont have the neck of a giraffe to twist around."

"oh, my bad." you said sheepishly. "do you have a mirror?"

"i did, then i broke it. pieces should be in a corner somewhere."

you mentally scolded his carelessness.

you managed to find a piece big enough for him to see your creation upon his skin.

"i drew a star." you wanted to facepalm at how silly it sounded.

star was a bit of a stretch, you connected lines scarred on his bank to form a lopsided and wonky-shaped star.

he just stared at it, not uttering a word. you moved to try to wipe off the mark, but he grabbed your wrist before you could.

"no," he grins, "i adore it. do more of them."

you did. it was a whole galaxy of stars embedded on him.

he stayed mute as he watched you through the shard of mirror while you doodled, but suddenly he spoke and gave you details as to what his knew of his father's plans and the location of brendon & winston.

"why are you suddenly telling me this, why now?"

"it's what your here for, isn't it."

you rushed over to castle immediately and repeated everything aaron told you. he thanked you for the information before he called in others to draw up a plot of attack. you all were to leave immediately the next day.

castle called a meeting in the lunch hall a few hours later; everyone at omega point was gathered there.

he briefed them on the commander's plans or what the plan was supposed to be so far. of course, people were suspicious of this information coming from warner, not trusting him at all; not that you could blame them.

"he's immune to both of the ferrars abilities, he can touch juliette with no issue and y/n can't get into his head. after this reveal, we did some test, and we've come to find out he's gifted like the rest of us."

the room exploded in chaos, gasps, yells, and protests coming from all different directions. a lot of ongoing looks toward your table. castle raised his voice to calm everyone down.

you and juliette didn't stick around long after, for one you already knew the information being given , and two, the stares and questions were getting annoying and uncomfortable.

however, adam shortly followed the two of you out, desperate to speak to juliette, and you knew why - warner being able to touch her.

they began talking intensely as if you weren't there. you watched from the sidelines as juliette explained her side and adam getting more frustrated.

you butted in at a point, you felt bad for the guy, but your sister came first. “adam, maybe it's best you leave to cool down.”

but your voice of reason only irritated him. “how about you stop inserting yourself into your sister’s affairs and let her speak for herself.”

"what is your issue?"

"this is between juliette and i; she doesn't need you speaking for her."

"you hypocrite, that's what you're doing right now!"

"why don't you go fraternize with warner, that's all you seem to be doing these days." adam venomously spat at you.

as if the mention of his name made him appear, warner's presence made it known. he stepped in front of you, dividing you and adam who got closer as the argument headed.

"kent, you've really got an attribute for being infuriating and vexing."

that set off the fire for an intense standoff between the two. adam, already mad at aaron, started the verbal feud.

it got so heated, kenji inserted himself between the two - trying to stop the commotion. you even grabbed aaron's arm to pull him away.

it was all happening so quick; one moment, they were shooting insults back and forth, the next instant kenji was dropping to the floor clutching his head in pain.

juliette immediately called out for help, finding castle, who brought in sonya and sara to take kenji to the medic.

adam and juliette went trailing after them, but you stayed there stunned. what did you do?

you had a flashback to the experiment - kenji reacting, in the same manner, those soldiers had after you freaked out.

you felt extremely horrible for kenji and you prayed he would be alright.

but you hadn't intended to hurt kenji nor did you exert any force in using your powers. you had better practice with your energy, so it didn't make sense.

aaron, still beside you, reached out to you - but you instinctively took a step back. you weren't sure what was happening to you, and the last thing you wanted was to hurt someone else accidentally.

"probably better you stay back," you looked down at your hands in fright, "i don't have control right now, i'm don't even understand how i did that to kenji."

"because amor, you didn't injure him. i did."

your confusion only deepened with that. then he brought back the mention of his gift, and you put the puzzle pieces together as he spoke.

"so you can basically can absorb someone else's power and use it?"

"a little more complicated than that. i can sense people's energy, like right now i know you're confused and worried for your friend, but also scared of yourself for what you did, or thought you did."

he elaborated, saying he unintentionally manifested your energy when you touched him. when kenji grabbed his arm, in an attempt to pull him away, that was when he projected the energy on him and hurting him in the process.

"wait, so does that mean you have my ability to read minds too?"

"hmm, i haven't given it a chance," he smirks at you "would you like to be my test subject?"

"absolutely not."

later that night, you check with sara and sonya on kenji's condition. they informed you that he was alright, but just needed some rest. after, you met up with castle in his office, finalizing plans for the morning - the beginning of the battle.

before you said goodbye, you had a question that had been crossing your mind.

"why do you trust ar-, er, warner, what's to say he won't turn his back."

"well, i guess i can't say for sure that he won't. i just have to have faith in mr. warner that he will make the right decision for himself. and with your added presence, i'm sure he's more open to that than ever."

"what do you mean?"

"surely you realize he's in love with you. he's even told me himself."

"he..he told you he was in love with me?"

"yes, just after i was discussing his gift with him." he said it like it was the most casual thing.

you stayed to chat briefly after. you directly headed to aaron's room, no longer littered with guards since he was considered a "member." you were able to walk in with no issue.

aaron hadn't been asleep yet when you got there, he was sitting up on his bed, which had a frame now, reading a book.

you didn't give him a chance to react to your sudden intrusion before you started speaking.

"why would you tell castle you're in love with me"

he furrowed his brows, but you kept going - you were set on getting answers.

"how could you just.. say something like that, what is your motive? are you trying to get to me?"

"amor, calm down. i have no motive." he said, standing up and walking toward you.

"then why would you even say that."

"isn't it clear?" he gets nears, a hand going to cradle the underside of your face, "i meant what i said."

"you can't love someone you barely know."

"but that's just it. i do know you. i've read your mind on paper, and experienced you for myself the moment i met you. i know that you hate to be wrong, you want to clench your first when you lie, although juliette is older by a bit - you feel the need to protect her, you're afraid of the dark, but never admit it, you hate yourself for loving your powers, and you want so badly to be accepted here because of your lonely childhood. shall i go on?"

you were flabbergasted by his word, and you couldn't even deny that they weren't true.

"how do you know this?"

"because, as my dear father put it, it seem you've bewitched me, my mind, and my body."

then he kissed you. and you let him.

and you very much liked it.

it was a longing, messy, kiss - he had you against the wall, lifted by your hips to his height. you wrapped your arms around his neck kissing him deeper, not letting any thoughts or worries flow from you for the moment.

the doors opened. "y/n? are you her-" then a gasp.

you recognized the voice - juliette.

you immediately panicked and pushed aaron away, attempting an explanation yo your sister, but she was already turning her feet and running away.

you gave warner a glance before you ran off in her direction.

you caught up to her, "juliette, please, wait!"

she abruptly stopped her feet and turned to you, "what are you doing y/n? kissing warner, are everything he's done!"

"it's just... i didn't... it's not like-" you struggled to put it into words.

"so what, you- you like the guy who kidnapped us? the one who shot a guy in front of us. experimented - borderline tortured us? he made me hurt a child, y/n. a child! and now you're making out with him."

you were at a loss for words, tears starting to build up at her harsh words.

"you're an idiot if you think you could love him, and even stupider to think a cold heartless person like him could love you. and i won't have anything to do with you if you keep him in your life." and with that she waked off, leaving you in the hall.

you didn't go back to warner after your fight, nor did you go back to your room immediately. you shamefully found an empty closet to cry into for a while. once you were able to breathe normally, you went back to the shared room - luckily everyone was fast asleep.

by morning, everyone was preparing for the rescue of brendan and winston. you and juliette exchanged no words; you attempted - but was shut down every time. she had never been this mad at you. so you just suited up and went to find kenji. kenji sensed the tension between you sisters, but didn't push for information.

you came to found out from castle, aaron warner was gone - he escaped omega point. likely on his way to the reestablishment.

you didn't want to focus on why a part of you was hurt when you heard that.

the battle was not a scene for the light-hearted - anderson's men had already begun gathering civilians and spewing blood. if you didn't have a strong stomach, you'd already be spilling your guts.

midway through dodging bullets and soldiers, you felt a shift in the already dire environment. there was something wrong, and you sensed it.

you urged kenji you felt the need to return to omega point - there was something wrong. he wasn't too convinced by your vague intuition, so you sought off on your own, doing your best to avoid the battlefield.

you ran into juliette at some point, not caring for your argument at the moment, and told her your inkling. she also brushed you off, telling it wasn't a time for your dramatics.

even with no support, you went back - you couldn't ignore this feeling.

you were maybe 200 ft away from omega point when it happened. bombs were dropped on the territory - causing the destruction of the building and any remaining members who stayed behind.

the explosion was powerful - even from where you were standing, it sent you both painfully flying back. you blacked out before you could react to the tragic ending of omega point.

you regained consciousness after consecutive kicks to your ribs and a voice telling you to wake up.

in front of you stood a crippled anderson, standing with he support of a cain. his composure was calm, but you could see the hatred behind his eyes.

you painfully stood up, surveying the area. you were in a house - similar to the one from last time.

you felt weak, dizzy, and the world was a bit blurry. you were leaning on a mantle to support your standing.

"ah, the fatigue your feeling would be my own fault. had those lovely sisters inject you with something. it will incapacitate you enough that you won't be a threat. can't have you flipping tables again."

you were barely registering his words, but when he mentioned sisters it gave you a bit of a jump start. he had sara and sonya.

your words felt faint, but you demanded to know where they were. he assured you they were unharmed, but it did nothing to ease you.

midway your conversation, warner enters the room - shocked to see you there. you probably would've reacted if you weren't so dosed on drugs.

"now that we have this reunion out the way, i'm going to be generous, something you ought to appreciate. you can tell me where your sister is and where the rest of your band of freaks are. you can aid me in destroying them and only after will i grant you the mercy of joining the reestablishment."

"what do you want with juliette?"

"she did this to me," he gestured to his legs, "and now i want my compensation."

no matter the situation with your sister, you'd never give her up.

"go to hell."

he sighs, "a disappointment once again, miss ferrars." he turns to his son, "this is why it's important i teach you this very valuable lesson son."

warner goes rigid, "what do you mean?"

warner pull out his shotgun, "justice, should always be served - even if it has to be by your own means."

then you were shot right in the chest.

you blacked out, then started slipping in and out of consciousness. all you remember is blood spilling from you at a rapid pace, and aaron crouched in front of you.

you remember voices - aarons, sara, and sonya's talking in rushed voices - then it was only aaron.

"hey cmon, amor, stay with me."

"wow... getting in the chest really sucks. i feel really bad about shooting you now." you spoke deliriously.

"it's alright, i just need you to hold on a little longer." his voice strained, holding back anguish.

but you didn't; you passed out, your last thoughts hoping juliette would throw you a nice funeral, enough though she was upset at you.

#aaron warner x reader #aaron warner imagine #aaron warner fanfic #aaron warner #aaron warner anderson #shatter me #shatter me fanfic #unravel me #juliette ferrars #kenji kishimoto #adam kent #x female reader #x y/n #x reader #reader insert #reader imagine #headcannons

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fanfic-obsessed · 10 months

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What the Fuck

You know, I have a fair amount of fondness for what could be considered light Qui Gon bashing, specifically in regards to how he raised Obi Wan. I wonder if any of you could tell?

Along those lines I there is one thing I would love to see more of, the High Council finding out much later (like during the war) the fucked up parts of Obi Wan’s padawanship and just go ‘Fucking what????’

Walk with me for a minute while I explain. Also this is an idea for an AU not a commentary on any version of cannon.

There are 10,000 Jedi. There is no way the high council could be personally involved with all the Master Padawan pairs, not to mention not all the members during the war were members during Obi Wan’s padawan years. So let’s start from the premise that Qui Gon and Obi Wan had the normal amount of interaction with the High Council. This is, in part, because Qui Gonn lies like a rug for 90% of their reports to make them seem more normal than they actually are. In this idea Qui Gon is also at the very least emotionally abusive and negligent, if not physically abusive as well.

So Obi Wan grows up thinking things like being left in a Cantina for hours to days is normal Master behavior, or being lost in bet (both intentionally to track slave rings and just because Qui Gon did not have as good a hand as he thought), or being forced to meditate his needs away for days, or the crippling anxiety that Qui Gon seemed to be deliberately instilling. Obi Wan never does these things to Anakin (Obi Wan just cannot convince himself to treat Anakin like he was treated, but justifies it to himself that it was Anakin that had the strange padawanship because he came to the temple too late and too early. He does always feel like a failure of a master for the fact that he couldn’t do it).

Obi Wan doesn’t talk about it to other Jedi, not out of shame but out of the sincerely held belief that every padawan faced the same, that it would be boring. He does not tell Anakin because he does not want to make his padawan feel bad for having a strange padawanship.

He does give utterly horrifying answers to any member of his battalion that asks questions about his padawan years, which convinces the clones that the Jedi need to be protected from themselves.

Now that we have set the stage, I think this should be a random time not tied to any specific set of events. Though It should be after Ahsoka is assigned to Anakin. I kind of want the Anakin, Ahsoka, Cody, and Rex present and the High council has just finished the “official” part of the meeting and have moved on to just chatting, or maybe it was before the meeting began, or perhaps it is semi official where they are talking about some Cantina in the mid rim that would be useful in an upcoming mission.

No matter the situation, Obi Wan fondly reminisces about the proprietor and how they (the proprietor, Obi Wan, and some of the regulars) had worked out a routine where Obi Wan would lure in slavers that targeted children, the proprietor would drug them, and the regulars would steal their things and figure out where they were hiding their ‘product’.

There is confused silence among the jedi present. At last Plo Koon goes ‘I know you looked young without your beard, but I didn’t think it was that young’ while thinking that he didn’t think he was that bad at judging near human ages.

Obi Wan laughs and goes ‘oh no. This was when I was 14, though I was a bit stunted after Melida/Daan so I did look a few years younger. Master Jinn like to gamble around the corner whenever we had a mission that brought us to that sector, he got great tips about the slave trade. I was so scrawny that I didn’t make good collateral until I was 16. So he left me in the Cantina’. He then muses thoughtfully that the proprietor always seemed angry with Master Jinn when he came to collect Obi Wan.

There is a dead silence, every member of the High Council turned silently to stare at Obi Wan. Anakin, Ahsoka, and Rex looked shocked while Cody looked somewhere between tired and murderous as he stared into the middle distance.

Mace Windu asks, in that careful voice people can get where they don’t want to let on that there is anything wrong, about being ‘collateral’. Obi Wan answers with the air of someone who thinks their experience is much more universal than it was. Every answer he gives sparks more questions and more horror.

Obi Wan is so used to thinking that his experiences were universal that it takes him several questions before he realizes that no one is reacting as if this is normal. He starts to try and explain, you know trying to make himself understood because he assumes that it is merely him explaining badly, which makes it worse and worse and worse. Anakin is near hyperventilating because that was decidedly not how his own padawan years went (and explained some of the strange questions that Cody has asked him over the years).

Cody is actually relieved that the Jedi appear to be just as horrified over all of this as the clones were.

Each and every other member of the High council is both internally and visibly going ‘Fucken what????!!!’ with every statement Obi Wan is making. Just a straight up hour of being horrified, not evening being able to move onto guilt that no one noticed because of the sheer volume of WTF. Interspersed with various Jedi thinking about how they are going to need to get a therapist that is dedicated specifically to Obi Wan, and probably a therapist for the therapist to avoid burnout.

#star wars the clone wars #star wars au #fanfiction prompt #anakin skywalker #obi wan kenobi #mace windu #star wars #mentions of abuse #qui gon jinn bashing #mentions of sentient trafficking

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lyn-js · 14 days

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Dancing under the Moonlight | Prologue

Bradley Bradshaw x OC Reader (Nickname Honey)

Summary: After the Uranium Mission, Bradley Bradshaw decides he wants to settle down. Maybe even start a family at some point in time. But he felt so tired (and old) to be in the dating scene. That's until he sees a beautiful new bartender at The Hard Deck. Not only that; turns out she's Penny's niece, Beatrice. They both hit it off amazing, but for some reason, Beatrice isn't letting her walls down yet. But Bradley is going to get to the bottom of what Bea's big secret is.

Warnings: Swearing, angst, drinking, mentions of past abuse, fluff, eventually smut 18+, age gap (24 & 35)

You’re hiding in the closet in your bedroom. Scared for your life, trying to cover your mouth so he doesn’t hear you. You suddenly jolt at the sound of someone knocking on your door. But you don’t answer it, you stay inside not wanting to be found. A few minutes later you hear the door creak open, your whole body is pulverized with fear. You hear footsteps all around the room. But you finally hear someone call out for you.

“Bea…Beatrice, are you here?” you hear a female voice. You come to realize it’s you, Aunt Penny. You let out a gasp and start to let out all the waterworks from your body and start to sob uncontrollably. You hear her footsteps padding her way to the closet. She lets out a gasp of her own. Seeing you curled up with your knees to your chest, seeing the healing bruises on your arms and legs. She kneels and takes her hands and puts them on both sides of your cheeks, so she can fully see you.

“Oh, my honeybee. You’re safe now. Nobody is gonna hurt you ever again. Okay? I won't let that happen.” You just let her hug you. You miss having a warm embrace with you. You miss that motherly love and affection. You missed the one person who truly believed in you, and who wanted you to succeed in your dreams. You missed your mom.

You just simply nod, and let more tears run down your face, but you feel your aunt wipe away those tears, and give you a gentle kiss on your forehead. The next thing you know, you’re gathering all of your stuff that you can fit in Aunt Penny’s car. Including some of your clothes for work and some shoes. But before you went out the front door you ran over to where the TV stand was, untape your necklace that was on the back of it. You knew Zeke would look for anything worth anything to you and pon it off. But you would never let him take this away from you, your mom got you a necklace with a honey bee-shaped charm on it for graduation.

You took everything you needed and went off with Aunt Penny to Fightertown U.S.A.

(Bradley POV)

You were walking into The Hard Deck like any other normal night. You’ve been at this whole routine since the mission was a success. Ever since then, you haven't been able to sleep. Not being able to sleep alone for that matter of fact. You've always wanted to have somebody, somebody to come home to. To have a warm body next to you, someone to have a conversation with, actually talk about something other than work. Instead of walking into an empty apartment, falling asleep with no noise, slowly diving into an abyss of nothing.

But now, you’ve found a group of friends that you can talk to, hang out with, and find a connection with people you haven't had in a long time.

All of the squad was there, including Mav. We were all having a good time playing pool and darts, drinking, and making jokes with everyone. Until we see out the window, Penny pulls into the parking lot super fast. Then we all look over at Mav a second later when he gets a phone call from Penny.

“Hey, Pen-” He stops talking, getting cut off by her, we can actually kind of hear her through the phone. “Hey, Hey… slow down hon. Okay. Okay, I’ll be right out. Bye, hon.” We all look at him in a confused state. Something wrong Mav?” Phoenix asks with a little bit of curiousness in her voice. Then all of us asked but with only our facial expressions. Then, he just gives us a confusing stair. Not knowing what to say after talking With Penny. “Rooster. Walk with me for a minute?” he asks looking at me. I just nod and leave the group to see what he’s looking for.

“What’s up, whaddya need?” I ask him with the same curiousness in my voice. “Penny…Penny’s niece is here, and she doesn’t want to go back to the house. She doesn’t want to leave her there. So, is it possible for you to just help me bring her into the back?” He asks you. You're just trying to wrap your head around your head the crazy information you've just heard. You just agree and walk out with him.

You both are out of the bar and slowly make your way over to Penny. When you do, you see her talking to someone. That must be her niece that Mav was talking about. you think to yourself. You see both of her legs on the seat, pulling them close to her chest, just looking out the passenger window staring into oblivion. You can see a little bit of the fading bruises on parts of her legs. You’re starting to put your fists into a ball, almost making them turn ghost white. Not a lot. Just a little though.

When you see Penny go around to the other side to collect her from the passenger seat, you see her cling to Penny, almost like she would disappear if she had let her go. But Penny just whispers to the girl sweet nothings and tells her everything is going to be all right. Then we walk both of them into the bar.

When we get in, the group looks at me and Mav. Wondering if we had any answer to what was happening. We just look back, and keep walking to the back where Penny’s office is.

Once we get back there Penny sits her down and just wraps her in a hug and kisses her on the forehead. I start to daze out for a second, I can’t help when I see someone giving someone/thing else affection.

It always brings me back to when someone close and important to me. My mom. She would always make things feel better, and she would always make sure I felt safe, loved and cared for. When I lost her, I felt so alone, and like I had nobody else in the world to love and take care of me. Sometimes I wish she was still here.

But I snap out of my daze and focus on the situation before me.

(Back to your POV)

The only thing I can keep my eyes on are the pictures hanging on her wall, and some framed on the shelves. Some pictures were of my aunt and my mom when they were young. God, she looks so pretty. You thought to yourself when looking back at the same honey-colored eyes that you inherited from her. Others were of you when you were a baby, all the way up to a teenager. Graduation day, sleepovers with your best friend Chantal, and holding your baby cousin Amelia with her drool falling onto the front of your shirt. Even though you thought it was so gross, but you didn't care. You just wish you could just close your eyes and go back in time. Going back to when you were younger. When your amazing mom was alive. To when you were the most happy.

You just wanted to be left alone, curl up into a ball hide away from the world, and never be seen again. Not only were you embarrassed that you were about to start crying like a fucking maniac, but you look up for only a second, and you see a really cute mustached guy standing across from you. You’re on a fuckin’ roll Beatrice!!

You see Penny crouch down on the floor to talk to you. “Hey Honey,” she said with a warm smile, I just muster up a half-one because you were feeling so tired and worn down. “I have to go back out just for a little bit, but I have someone who can wait here with you. Is that okay?” You don't answer just yet, but again you look up and see the cute mustache guy is still there. He smiles and gives a simple wave, not seeming too scary. You simply nod and she kisses you on the cheek “I’ll be back in a little bit Honeybee, if you need me, or anything just call out for me. Okay?” I just give a quiet “okay” and then she gets up to leave.

Both your Aunt Penny and the other man walk out the door to go back to work. Just leaving you and the Mustache guy alone. With nothing to do. “You speak up to him “You don’t have to stay with me if you-” he cuts you off. “Even though we’re not talking, it’s nice to have some company. Especially if it’s not with Bagman annoying the shirt out of everyone,” he says. I let out a little chuckle, but my smile fades a little bit when he tries to shut the door. “C-could you keep the door open… please,” I stand up and say a little loudly. He looks back at me and I cower back in the wheely chair. “Hey, hey it’s okay if you want to keep the door open. We’ll keep it open, we're playing by your rules. Okay?” a little bit of tension leaves your body, and you let out a big breath. Not knowing why you were holding your breath. You look up to him speaking again.

“Is it okay if I can sit next to you? I mean, on the floor if that’s okay with you,” he says pointing to the floor tile next to the chair. “Oh no, I don’t want you to sit on the ground,” you say wanting to put up a fight. But also kind of knowing you would lose because you couldn’t say no to this attractive, cute, and tall man. Snap out of it. You just met him, get your mind out of the gutter stupid!

“Don’t worry, it’s not a problem, I’ve been cramped in an FA/18 for hours. Sitting on the floor in a small office is a piece of cake,” he says while kneeling and taking the spot next to you. You wanted to giggle a little bit because of course your aunt has a small office, and you look at this man that’s as tall as a fucking oak tree trying to sit on the small, maybe a little bit dirty floor. Also seeing him scrunch his long legs close to his body. Trying to get me to think he is living his best life right now.

“I’m sorry, but I know for a fact that you are so uncomfortable right now,” you say to him, and starting to warm up a little bit. “Oh come on, I am living the life right now. Somebody get me a margarita.” he quietly yells out the front door. That has me leaning back in my chair laughing, which leads him to laugh with me.

After your laughter dies down a little bit, you both fall into silence, only hearing the rowdy patrons from the bar. You see him stick his hand out and start to speak. “I’m Bradley by the way. Bradley Bradshaw at your service.” You giggle a little bit more when his other hand comes up to his forehead to salute you. You were a little hesitant at first. Not wanting to fall into another trap. But for some reason, you feel sort of different around him. You feel a type of warm, and sweet comfort from him, you want to believe in yourself .He doesn’t seem so bad. But you try so hard to shove warm and lovey-dovey thoughts in the back of your mind. But you just can help it.

Just when he was about to drop his hand back down to his side, you put your hand out too. “Beatrice Benjmine. Also at your service.” You also offer the fake salute, then you hear him chuckle and take your hand to shake. His hand feels so warm, and calloused against your small dainty ones. You could also see a big size difference in your hands too, wanting to know what was also big about him. OH MY GOD BEA, What are you doing!!!

You snap out of your mind and come back in the moment. You both are still looking at each other. Hands still together and shaking. But you both drop each other hands and fall into a light conversation until you hear Aunt Penny coming into the office telling you it’s closing time and heading home. You and Bradley both decide to get up so he can walk you and your Aunt out to her car.

When all three of you were outside and walking to the car you heard Bradley speak up and talk to you. “It was nice meeting you, Beatrice. Hopefully, I will see you again,” Once again putting his hand up to salute you. You start to giggle. “It was a pleasure meeting you too.” you salute back. After that he walks past you to get the passenger door open, you give him a warm smile and get into the seat. When He closes your door you see him through the window smiling at you and giving you a small wave. You wave back when Aunt Penny starts to pull away, but you can see him in the rearview mirror walking over to a blue car and getting in, maybe going home himself. But you just stare back out the window watching the waves roll to the shore with the moon sparkling over the waves.

You want to believe Bradley is a good guy, that he wouldn’t hurt you like Zeke did. But you have a sense of love and protection he would have for his other friends he was talking about earlier. You wanted to trust your mind, but you couldn’t just yet.

Even though you just met him that night, you wish you could form a good and happy friendship with Bradley. But being your usual crazy self, thinking in the back of your mind. Only to hope it can turn into something a just little more.

I hope you all like the prologue for this story. I have a big story line for Beatrice and Bradley.

Reblogs are always welcome. Unless you're under 18. I will block you. and comment if you want to be added to the taglist. If I forgot anybody message me and let me know. You will be added.

Taglist: @caitsymichelle13 @shanimallina87 @angelbabyyy99 @callsign-magnolia

Once again dividers are by @saradika

#bradley rooster bradshaw #tgm fic #rooster x reader #rooster top gun #tgm oc #top gun maverick #bradley bradshaw x reader #top gun fanfiction

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grimbanes · 1 year

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I'm Getting Used to You. (Kaz Brekker x gn!reader)

Summary: “You should shut your mouth, Brekker, before you say something you regret. If you drive me out of here, you’ll only be back on my doorstep in five months time. You need me more than you want me so suck it up. You’re becoming a liability, not me,” Venom. You had enough, laying it out to him. Kaz’s form stood in front of the table, an unreadable expression on his face. OR kaz and the reader have a hard conversation and you're pretty tired of his shit. PART TWO OF I WAS USING YOU. WC: 3.1k GENRE: angst, minor action, sprinklings of fluff, ooc kaz? tw: violence, blood, the usual warning for SOC. a/n: i left it open for a possible part 3. i intended for more angst but cheri cheri lady by modern talking was on replay.

You continued on your path through the streets of Ketterdam, baked goods tucked under your arm and a light skip in your step. The sun was starting to kiss the seas goodnight, laying to rest beneath her depths and the cool breath of night air was starting to introduce itself to leaning rooftops. Your shoulder had been healing nicely, still bandaged and sore at the joint, still bruised. It would scar and be a permanent reminder for yourself. Don’t fall in love with criminals. To everyone’s surprise, you and Kaz had fallen back into your usual routines with not a mention or hint of prior feelings being discussed. Business as usual.

Your shoulder had healed and your heart had frozen over and you had to learn to like it that way. You couldn’t let yourself be the kind of person to force somebody else to face your feelings for you, to pull you through your trauma instead of you learning to swim through it. You hadn’t been on a job in just over a month, Kaz’s orders. He said he hadn’t wanted to risk any liabilities in his plans and didn’t like to work around the possibility of one either. And you were glad for it. Getting shot was turning out to be one of the best things to ever happen to you.

As you approached the Crow Club, you momentarily considered just how lucky you were to have the people in your life that you did. You pushed the door open and immediately shuddered, welcoming the slightly warmer air and clicking the door behind you shut.

“Are you cold?” That voice that used to haunt your dreams and comfort your evenings called out from behind the bar, Kaz Brekker emerging with a ledger in one hand and a pen in the other. It seemed he had been taking stock, doing his usual numbers and checks. Perhaps the new liquor had been selling nicely or maybe he wanted to double check before they opened for the night.

“It’s Ketterdam. It’s always cold,” You smoothly replied, stepping further into the building and aiming for the door off to the side. You had fresh baked goods to store away, jams and creams to preserve or else they would spoil much too soon. You had workers to feed, after all, and street urchins who sometimes stopped by for some warmth and a snack before looking for a place to sleep for the night.

“Jes has gone to the Slat,” Kaz said uselessly, closer than you anticipated. You hadn’t even heard him follow you.

You glanced over your shoulder, wincing a little with the strain and met his curious gaze, those stoney irises watching you with careful consideration. That’s how the two of you were. No more breaths wasted on confessions or anguish. You didn’t even argue, not since you were shot. Instead he watched you like a crow scouting its next meal, lingering a little too long and offering you his presence. You liked it better than arguing, truly. That was draining and the last thing you needed was to be emotionally drained and injured.

You hummed in response to him, nodding once. You knew that already, Jesper had told you where he was spending his evening.

“Coffee?” You offered gently, holding up two cups.

“I have work to do.”

You didn’t fight him, nor did you react. Not like you used to. Before, you would have told him ‘work can wait for Dirtyhands to have a cup of tea’ or ‘indulge me, Mr Brekker, I know you want to’. Your routine with him was the same but the soft little moments you had together had been the price.

You ignored Kaz’s fidgeting, his lack of cane. You ignored the way he checked his timepiece, rocked on his feet and approached. You hummed to yourself as Kaz began to assist you, placing jams on shelves and creams aside - they would spoil by tomorrow, but it was treat enough. You only acknowledged it when you offered him a thankful smile, a nod and began to pour yourself your drink. You could only stare at his gloved hands as they delicately held onto the rim of a cup and settled it next to yours, his fingers lingering on it. Your head turned from the cup to Kaz, his eyes already locked onto you.

Kaz Brekker truly was a beautiful individual. High cheekbones and fresh scars, his bottom lip split from whatever fight he had recently been in. You had no doubt his knuckles beneath his gloves were scarred. He stood dressed in all black, the warm light of burning candles reflecting warmth in his conflicted irises - the way his throat bobbed and mouth twitched when he considered saying something, the tension rigid in his shoulders with the stiffness in his arm whilst holding the cup. He was an enigma and one you were deeply fond of, even if you didn’t wish to pursue anything with him further. It hurt too much.

With only you and Kaz Brekker standing in that building, you didn’t utter a word as you poured the hot liquid into his cup. You wouldn’t dare tell a soul that the Bastard of the Barrel changed his mind on something.

“Nina is also at the Slat,” Kaz spoke up, clearing his throat and stepping an inch back from you, startled by the lack of distance between the two of you - you wanted to roll your eyes.

“I know,” You replied curtly, sliding over his cup and bidding yourself exit from the makeshift kitchen.

“Then why are you here?” Kaz asked, a few uneven steps behind you but trailing you nonetheless. Kaz Brekker didn’t follow anyone.

“I work here,” You stated the obvious, sinking into a corner table beside the bar.

That seemed to be enough. Kaz stopped trailing you.

“You should quit,” He said from across the room, coffee in hand, his nose buried into his numbers and papers even though you both knew damn well he had it all memorised three times over.

You laughed, bitter and lacking all amusement. You slammed a hand down on the table, irritation bubbling deep in your skin. You never snapped. You were accepting, patient. All the things somebody like him needed when he was acting without thinking, sabotaging himself and you. This time, you weren’t putting up with it.

“You should shut your mouth, Brekker, before you say something you regret. If you drive me out of here, you’ll only be back on my doorstep in five months time. You need me more than you want me so suck it up. You’re becoming a liability, not me,” You had enough, laying it out to him. You were echoing Nina’s words back at him. Kaz had to realise what he was doing. He couldn’t not see it, right?

Kaz’s form stood in front of the table, an unreadable expression on his face. He pulled out a chair, sat down opposite you and carded his gloved fingers through his hair, disheveling his appearance further. He didn’t speak for a moment, analysing you. This is what he did, he studied and looked for weakness, one he could use against you later and force your hand when he deemed it convenient. Unfortunately for him, your only weakness happened to be him.

“I want you out of here by the time we open. You’re done with the Dregs,” Kaz decided, a small nod of his head and bitter curl of his lips.

His eyes didn’t meet yours, staring down at his twitching fingers atop the stained table. You stared at him incredulously. You laughed at him. Kaz Brekker, Bastard of the Barrel, was so afraid of his own feelings that he was really willing to fire you. You shook your head, an amused smile on your face and a snort escaping, pointing at him with a waggle of your finger as if to say ‘good one’.

“And who will be there to cover Jesper when he inevitably wanders away from the door? Who will cover Wylan on jobs when he has to focus on his other businesses? Who will watch your back when you need a scout? Certainly not Inej, she’s got her own life. Nina? Not likely. You need me, Brekker. You don’t have to want me, you can fight that all you want. You’re making rash decisions based on fear, on weakness, and it’s making you a hypocrite. It’s not easy for me either so just deal with it or go away,” You explained. You knew you were being condescending but it felt so good to be the only person who could talk down to Dirtyhands.

“I don’t want you gone because of feelings for you.” Kaz said, his gaze unwavering and irritation clear in the twitch of his eye, the lazy raise of his eyebrow and the subtle, dangerous smirk wanting to pull up one side of his face, “I want you gone because I don’t want you to be hurt again.”

You couldn’t stop your own guard from slipping, your expression falling the more you stared at him. He hadn’t been firing you, he was worried about you. You licked your lips, nodded once and then shuffled in your chair. You pulled it around the table, placed it next to Kaz’s and sat yourself beside him. Where you were always supposed to be. Without touching him, you leaned into his space, close enough that when he turned his head to face you, there were only mere inches between the two of you.

“We’re both very dark people, Kaz. Despite that, you’re still my light. I understand that you’re worried, that you don’t know how to process your feelings when you’re overwhelmed but that’s okay. We don’t always have to fight. We can just be,” You said with a small, tender smile on your mouth. All of your anger began to dissipate and the tension in Kaz’s shoulder began to cease, his hands unclenching and something akin to a smile graced his pale eyes, vulnerability staring straight back at you.

“We could have this,” Kaz mumbled, his head dipped and momentarily, his forehead knocked gently against yours. It was barely a touch, enough for him to exhale shakily, his throat bobbing and he was all yours in that single moment.

“That’s right, Kaz. We could have this,” You nodded and his head was turning from you, “You just have to want it enough. You’re a man who sees value, what value is this to you?”

Kaz steeled himself, leaning back in his chair and then he was looking at you again. Conflicted. He breathed out, rolled his tongue into his cheek and accepted his fate. His arm moved from in front of him to instead drape over the back of your chair, pulling the wood closer to himself and his eyes met yours once again, his bruised face illuminated in a stunning, golden glow. The dark cloud in front of you stepped aside, revealing the sunshine that he kept hidden deep beneath his rugged surface.

“I would burn kruge to keep you warm,” Kaz chose to say.

It was a silly response, one that had you laughing into your hand, your head cast aside. He was staring again, something soft painting his renaissance features a gentle version of his previous self. There was a tilt in his head, a subtle smile on the left corner of his lips that met his eyes, steady and confident as he always was. Your fingers hugged the surface of your cup and you clinked it against his.

“That would be a lot of kruge and besides… I don’t feel so cold anymore,” You said to him, watching relief practically emanate from every pore and every little motion that belonged to Kaz Brekker.

____________________________________________________________

You ducked and weaved, jumping back and arching yourself in a way to avoid swing after swing. You kissed your brass knuckles, pulled back your arm and lunged, cracking your fist down on an already bloody cheekbone. The man fell onto the floor and you groaned, rolling a kink out of your shoulder. Your weight shifted to your heel, realigning your centre of balance and you were kicking a leg out as you turned, the nails sticking out of the bottom of your boots sticking into a chest as you sent the second assailant into the alleyway wall. You wiped your forehead, smudging blood away. You had to run. If they pulled guns, that was it for you.

Turning on your heel, you darted towards the exit of the alleyway but instead of going through the exit, you hopped up and gripped onto the edge of a tall, damp wall. One foot at a time, you climbed and swung your body over the top. You dropped into a roll to carry the momentum and began to sprint. You weaved through carts and traders, slipping past Komedie Brute disguises. It had been foolish to wander so far, you knew it, but you just needed a nice stroll in the night and the weather had been somewhat clear for Ketterdam.

There was no other explanation. Someone from the gang must have let slip the precarious nature of your relationship with Kaz Brekker. You hadn’t put a label on it but it was obvious how you felt about one another. One of their many fools must have let it slip on a gambling table or in a rival club’s bar. You had been followed and targeted. Of course you would be, anyone would love the chance to get at the one man who had single handedly dominated the game to the point where it barely seemed like a war and more like a massacre. The possibility of turncoat or traitor was dangerous, accidental or not. It had to be dealt with.

You continued to run, scaling fences and low walls and arches, your stamina draining only slowly. You kept running even on the algae slick cobbled paths, throwing yourself down alleyways. Luckily, they weren’t able to keep you. You threw yourself up the stairs to the Crow Club, bursting through the door and staggering through patron and client. You kept pushing until you were throwing open the door to Kaz’s office, slamming it behind you. He looked at you with annoyance at first but it quickly turned to confusion, then anger.

“What happened to you?” Kaz asked, his tone dry. He gestured a hand for you to sit and you did, throwing yourself into the seat opposite him. His hair was slicked back away from his strong bone structure and he looked bored, itching to go do anything else even if he loved puzzles and numbers.

“Felt like going for a little walk and got jumped. Seems one of our donnies may have said something he shouldn’t have,” You said, accepting the handkerchief Kaz extended to you between two fingers. You wiped blood away, hissing. He then opened his drawer, pulling out a flask of what could only be his usual brandy and he tossed it to you. You opened it, poured it on the cloth and began to wipe at your cuts and bruises, sterilising them.

“There’s always a risk in being associated with me,” He said but it was evident that he was unsettled. He rose from his seat, left his paperwork open and circled the desk.

The young man sat against it, his tall height towering over you and gingerly, he took the handkerchief from your clumsy hands. He’d always been dexterous, careful and exact with his skilled hands, much more elegant than you would ever be. Kaz took your chin in between his finger and thumb, tilted your head up to look at him. Bow shaped, unfairly pink lips pressed into a firm line and gentle touches brushed your fresh cuts, wiping away fresh blood. Carefully, he turned your head to the side and tutted, dabbing your temple. If it affected him, he was doing well not to show it other than heavier breathing. He didn’t stop until he was satisfied, his hands dropping to settle in front of him and he stared at you.

“No murderous intent?” You asked quietly, leaned forward. You wouldn’t push into his space. He always had to come to you first, you didn’t want to overwhelm him.

Kaz’s lips broke into a malicious grin, his teeth on show and something dangerous stared back at you in his blue hydrangea eyes, a flood beginning to rise and a cyclone daring to push onto land. “Oh darling, I am furious. Patience is a skill I have mastered and nurtured. I’m going to gut every single Dreg until my floors are stained the perfect shade of red. I’ve been meaning to redecorate.”

“Who knew you were such a romantic,” You laughed, your heart stuttering your chest.

Blood was currency in Ketterdam, worth so much more than kruge and everybody and anybody knew if there was one thing Kaz craved more than kruge, it was blood. His gloved fingers brushed hair away from your face, tucking it behind your ear and he was everything in that moment. He was violent and he was malicious. He was loving and he was affectionate. More importantly, you were truly starting to believe that he was yours. He tutted, tsked and sighed, pushing away from the desk and reached for his cane where it had been propped against his desk.

“Will you be alright?” He asked, the thunderous rage crackling through his towering figure adorned in black and gold and you had never felt more loved in your entire life. Kaz was making sure you were okay before he got his own revenge. How sweet. You smiled, your cheeks flushed pink.

“Even if I wasn’t, I know you’d make sure I would be,” You teased, standing behind him and he glanced at you from over his shoulder, his brows raised.

“Whatever helps you sleep at night,” He rolled his eyes, turning around to face you and leaning his weight into his cane.

“Is that an offer?”

“I’ll cut out your tongue if you keep talking, love,” Kaz stepped past you, reaching for the handle of the door and then he paused, looked at you and pointed his finger as he said, “Stay here. If I see you anywhere but this office, I’ll break your legs too.”

“If you want me on my knees, just ask,” You continued, flipping through the pages on his desk.

“You’re irritating.”

“You adore me,” You were still distracting him from completing his mission but you were thoroughly enjoying the hold you had over him. Kaz shook his head, annoyed.

“I do.”

That was the last thing he said before the door was slamming behind him.

You hadn’t expected him to agree.

tags: @noctemys @osteopsycho @stxrg4zer @vyctorya

( comment if you want to be apart of future tags! )

#kaz brekker x reader #kaz brekker x you #kaz brekker x y/n #kaz brekker #six of crows #six of crows duology #shadow and bone season 2 #shadow and bone #shadow and bone netflix #grishaverse

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