#no seriously with the twins too this is fake and it's so frustrating to see acn losing ☹️☹️☹️☹️ | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

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#no seriously with the twins too this is fake and it's so frustrating to see acn losing ☹️☹️☹️☹️

iuwon · 2 years

Text

X ▸ yang jungwon (part i)

▸ DESCRIPTION : what do you get when you have a stupid asshole of a bestfriend (who’s completely head over heels for you, should he add) and a fucked up ego that refuses to admit any form of defeat? you guessed it: the summoning of a jealous ex-boyfriend who dumped you two years ago, and is hell-bent on winning you back.

▸ PAIRING : ex!yang jungwon x female reader (feat. nishimura riki)

▸ GENRE(S) : angst, fluff, slow burn, exes au, college au

▸ WORD COUNT : 28.5k+

▸ WARNING(S) : this is very fast-paced for a slow burn, VERY cringe-y angst and writing (pls spare me it’s my first time😭), fake-dating with riki, JUNGWON REDEMPTION ARC ON PART 2, breakup scenes, indication of hang-ups and love triangles, jealousy, profanities, mentions of a car accident, blood, flashbacks from before and after the breakup, both reader and jungwon have issues :D, this has a second part because the fic is too long, not proofread, kindly let me know if there are any more ^-^

▸ SPOTIFY PLAYLIST : here

▸ UPDATED A/N : hello!! i finished this fic on the start of 2022 and then left it like that when i went on my hiatus, so rereading it nearing the end of 2022 .. i CANNOT take this seriously LMFAOO i was high and i dramatized everything im sawry. But. this is the longest fic i’ve written so far and for that i’m sort of :D i have little to almost zero experience of writing long fics AND angst, so i really hope to any who read this won’t have any high expectations T^T pls lmk your thoughts on this one!

▸ REQUESTED! for my scorpio twin anon :)

SOME PEOPLE ARE JUST LIKE KITES.

Someone had said that once, you remember. They’re the type of people that don’t have their two feet planted anywhere near the ground. They fly, and they keep flying. They have their mind fixated on solely reaching higher and higher up the sky just to blissfully enjoy the breeze.

They continue to fly up once the string is held securely in someone’s hand. The thought never crosses their mind that the person holding the string might ever grow tired, or that the person would only continue to hold on because it’s hard to release the string - because it’s hard to let go.

Sometimes, the kite flies away. Either the wind current was too strong, or maybe it slipped out of your grasp. In the end, the one holding the kite is always the one to blame for carelessly losing them - it’s the person who mourns of the lost kite and suffers the consequences.

↻ … ᶠˡᵃˢʰᵇᵃᶜᵏ

You were the type that always focused on studies.

A homebody was what you were. To you, school was meant for school. The topic of boys never interested you, and Yang Jungwon wasn’t anywhere never of an exemption.

Yang Jungwon, the notorious musical genius – the charming boy-wonder who lived in his own 4D world. People could say countless of sweet things to describe him, but you would forever see him as a person who was incapable of holding an interest for anyone for longer than his short attention span could hold – much more a romantic one.

You hissed in frustration, “Yang Jungwon, I swear to God, if you will not leave me alone -” your tone doesn’t faze him at all, as expected. He was immune to all your threats and remarks long before. A wide cheeky grin splits open his features before his hand reaches over and snatches your chemistry textbook at the mid-sentence of your threat, peeking over at it, “Chemical bonding?” he reads aloud, titling his head.

And he irritates you further. Your mid-term finals were next week, and you were barely getting any of the subjects done at this rate. You were close to college, and you did not want to have anything, or anyone mess it up.

You glare at him, “I’ve been at the same topic for the past half hour because of you,” trying to reach over your stolen textbook from the boy who never just seemed to leave you alone, his lips tug downwards in a musing pout. He stares at you before his eyes light up in thought.

Without another word, he leaves his chair beside you, not before passing you your book. You immediately grip onto your textbook with relief, skeptical that he’d grab it back away from you again.

Moments pass and you have the time all to yourself to study, but it’s too quiet for you - despite being at a bustling café. You turn your head to both your sides, eyes subconsciously searching for him. You blink, where did he go? Did you manage to kick him out once and for all -?

A whisper from your left ear interrupts your thoughts, and you feel a warm figure lightly pressing against you from behind, “try to sing out the formulas, they’re easier to remember.”

You almost yelp in surprise, jumping away from him. Where the hell did he come from? “Yah, are you crazy -?” you began, but he starts to lightheartedly poke fun. “C’mon, do it. It’ll be easier to remember,” he encourages you, pulling out a guitar from behind. You didn’t even bother to question where he had the time to get his guitar. All you were thinking about were ways to make him leave.

You shot him a look, annoyed. “Do what?”

He was always so childish. So bothersome.

He randomly strums out his guitar strings before picking up a tune, “Sing the formulas out,” his eyes momentarily directed you to the textbook laid out on the table, “I’ll help you with the melody. Go on,” you were ready to throw a harsh retort at him, telling him off to how he was wasting your time and how his idea was stupid - but his eyes; his perfectly shaped eyes looking ever so purely earnest your way.

You hated it.

You weren’t a musical genius or any of that sort, that was all Jungwon. You couldn’t just whip out the best melodic high note nor could you memorize a thousand slide powerpoint discussion even with the help of music. He didn’t have to worry about his grades - hence, his carefree attitude - and he didn’t have to stress over finals week when his career in music was already made out for him. All he ever did around school was tag along and annoy you, try the most obnoxious attempts to ask you out, play his guitar, and listen to music in the earphones he never took off.

You hesitantly look away, if you went along with him - maybe he’d go away once he got what he wanted to do. Little did you know how helpful the technique Jungwon suggested came out - or how fun it actually tuned out to be despite how awful your voice was, he was still looking at you like you were the singing like the angels.

Barely another hour later, you remarkably managed to get it all by heart and cover the topics that couldn’t have been covered in at least three days - with the help of the one person who has been disturbing you from studying in the first place. You could only gawk dumbly at his guitar.

Jungwon could sense your astonishment from miles away, and that made him all the more complacent with the huge beam he was wearing on his face. He wasn’t going to merely let this go. That trademark boyish look of his is back. “For my payment of very helpful service,” he starts as if you had ever asked him in the first place as he pretends to think, humming, “I’ll accept it in forms of you allowing me to take you out,” he suggests gleefully, his eyes sparkling in mischief.

You would normally scoff at his attempt yet again, telling him off - but this time. You couldn’t keep count of the endless tries he’s pulled this trick. This time you helplessly shake your head with a roll of your eyes. You couldn’t keep count of anything anymore, nor were you going to start now.

Yang Jungwon wasn’t going to give up on you.

… ᵉⁿᵈ ᶠˡᵃˢʰᵇᵃᶜᵏ ↺

TWO YEARS LATER [ JUNGWON’S POV ]

Through the extent of his memory, you never failed to take care of Yang Jungwon.

Not once. No matter how hard you would push him aside and passively act like you didn’t care much about him, you would be there for him; you would always be there. By his side.

And then you were gone.

Jungwon was two years older now.

Checking the items in his shopping bag to see if everything was complete, he leaves the grocery store, rummaging through his purchased items when his body swiftly crashes onto something. He takes a few steps to regain his stance as he stumbles backward.

“Oh, sorry,” someone says, and it takes a moment or two before he snapped out of his daze. He turns instinctively to the direction of the voice as he tries to readjust his grip on his pile of bags.

That voice. He knows that voice.

But for a moment, his breathing halts, body stiffening instantly at the sight of someone he’d never expected to see. Never. Never again. Because this time, it’s you.

You.

You blink, showing mild surprise. And indifference. As if you were looking straight at a stranger. Your eyes pointedly averts itself away from him while you keep the proper formalities and try to start a conversation with your composure, “Uh, hello. How are you?”

To say that he’s caught off guard is too much of an understatement.

You looked different.

You looked good.

No.

You looked beautiful.

Is he dead? No, wait. What? Air gets knocked out of his lungs and he feels like he’s been punched in the gut at the same time.

You looked more beautiful than the image that he had of you for the past years, and it breaks him.

Like nothing has ever pulled you down – as if leaving you only did you good – as if it never happened or affected you by the least.

How could you look so well?

To say that Jungwon looked like a mess was an understatement.

He bit his tongue, cursing for choosing the greatest timing. He tugged at the hem of his shirt, subtly trying to adjust it. What should he do . . . now? How should he start?

How were you? Why didn’t you look for him? Were you doing fine? Did you find someone else? Have you moved on? Should he move on? Did you -

In the short silence, you seemed to be relieved to receive a text message, the ding that gives you an excuse to look away and check your phone. You make a face, feeling suddenly alarmed. Expression rushed, you formally bid him goodbye, and it fucking hurts him even more. “Nice seeing you. I should be on my way now. Have a nice day.”

A strangers’ nice pleasantry. With no sincerity.

But you walk away, leaving him – not bothering to ask him for another meet-up. Jungwon is left standing in the middle of the street, dumbfounded.

Like it ended here.

Is this it?

He wasn’t even able to get to say anything.

This was worse than being nothing to each other.

It was worse than being treated like someone you hated.

He tries to inhale.

Jungwon has no idea, honestly. Not anymore.

One day, he had told himself for years.

One day, he would broadly smile at you. He’d stand proudly confident, and you’d know that he’s gotten over you for good. He’d win and see that he’s no longer suffering. You would see. You would. He’d get over you.

But bumping into you for the first time in years had Jungwon rethinking if he’s ever gotten over your eyes in the first place.

PRESENT

You can sulk for a little, throw a tantrum - but a kite is a kite. There’s no chance of it coming back; once you let go, it doesn’t look back at you to pause and run back to your hold. There was only one thing you could do from thereon: you could always forget about it, toss it aside like a child does, and replace it with a new one; making sure it’s a much better kind.

That. That was something you reminded yourself time and time again for the past two years. Though the line was taken from a measly television show that you’ve watched long ago, it’s been the only line of string that kept you from looking back - like a mother telling her child to stop crying over a lost kite.

But, right then and there, it was like time itself pauses for you when you stand in the same café four years ago, hearing the all-familiar voice that you could never forget. There, when you feel your heart beating out of your control and dropping dead. There, where you’re not sure of the extent of what you could restrain yourself from doing.

You don’t know how you’re suddenly transported to the direction of the soft voice - it’s familiarity greeting you, and for a brief second, the memories you’ve burned long ago painfully flash back to mind - you almost flinch.

[ now playing ◃◃ ⅠⅠ ▹▹ train wreck by james arthur ]

“I don’t wanna lose this, but I’m not getting through this. Hey, should I pray? Should I pray? Yeah,” Yang Jungwon.

It’s him.

Him, with his stupidly beautiful voice and his damn entrancing presence dragging you back harder than you remembered, and the pain he’s trying to immerse himself in as he ignores his physical surroundings.

And you.

You, as you’re trying to fight away the haunting flash of memories that are slowly starting to accompany you, and you, as you could do nothing but fleetingly watch him.

This was the second time you’ve bumped into him. You snorted, why was he always everywhere you went?

And it was like after the years of methodically stitching yourself back together, you’re transported back to the same person you were two years ago.

A fool.

“To myself? To a God? To a savior who can …”

You admit, there were days where you forgot his face - or in other words, days where you refused to acknowledge how he used to look at you. Days where it was too painful to even think about.

You swear to yourself that those days are long over.

Standing across the end of the room after three years of absolutely nothing from him felt suffocating, as if there was no air to breathe. You didn’t realize you were holding in a short breath, and when you exhaled - you felt pinning, and needles, and knives stabbed deep into your lungs.

“Unbreak the broken, unsay these spoken words. Find hope in the hopeless - pull me out of the train wreck,”

When Jungwon’s eyes slowly open, the first thing he sees is you.

Both your eyes meet, and he freezes. All too slowly. Everything in motion. You notice how his eyes widen, and how the old memories flash in his eyes all the same.

PainMiseryHurtDisbeliefHope-

The regret.

All this happens in front of you. A dream. A nightmare. All at once. Your face remains passive and unaffected, hard - nonchalant with ease, refusing to feel bothered. Time seems slow, but you don’t hesitate to casually walk away, being the first to break eye-contact. You didn’t want to spend another second in that room.

Your grip on the drink in hand tightens in its own accord.

You’ve moved on.

But what was this sort of feeling enveloping you in?

A teasing wolf-whistle startles you on your way out of the café, ripping you out of the lethargic trance you were warped into. “Was that an ex I saw over there?” You find Nishimura Riki with his shit-eating face and his waggling of eyebrows up beside you. Grimacing at his face, you harshly nudge your elbow to his sides in annoyance.

Breathing is a little bit easier with him around.

But you still feel like vomiting. “Is shutting up not part of how your brain is wired?” you roll your eyes, showing no effort at all to hide your agitation. He lets out an amused laugh, his playful gaze only duplicating itself as he proceeds to brutally tease you.

Riki isn’t an asshole. Not really. He’s what you’d call your best friend … without much other choice. Though he can perfectly embody one, he knows his limits (though you may sometimes find yourself doubting it) and the extents to where he can joke around. He can be all sorts annoying and a douche whenever food is on the line, but he’s the only one who’s stuck with you since day one of what happened two years ago - and never bothered to pressure you into questions that tormented you even further.

You lost contact with the friends you had once shared along with Jungwon. It felt embarrassing and uncomfortable to hang around them with everyone aware of what happened, until it was long months later that it just didn’t seem right to suddenly start hanging around them again after your efforts vigorously avoiding them.

You’ve lost a lot.

And you just met the man behind it all.

Nishimura Riki was sort of all you had, and he knew that too. He figured everything that happened eventually through time, by himself. Picking up the little things wasn’t too difficult to do, neither was piecing everything together with a little help and slow nudge from you over the years.

“He’s moving in this building, you know,” he looks over to your side.

Your stomach lurches, freezing in place. Your jaw nearly drops to the floor, gaping at him like your eyes would bulge out any second.

Over your fucking dead body.

That building was precisely the building you lived in. “What?” you nearly yell, causing passersby walking along the sidewalks to throw the both of you looks.

He rolls his eyes, “Geez, princess, clam down. I was kidding,” he bumps his shoulder next to yours, as if he was trying to shake you up. He starts going over about how you were showing ‘hang-ups’ symptoms before you start barking a mouthful of threatening-nothings to have him shut his mouth, running after him.

Something rings different, however.

Yang Jungwon.

The name lingers in the back of your head, no matter how hard you try to push it away. It’s been three years, but when the kite you’ve lost years ago - the kite you swore you’ve already forgotten about - comes back, what then?

↻ … ᶠˡᵃˢʰᵇᵃᶜᵏ

You weren’t necessarily the warmest type of person.

Blank faces, blunt responses, and sharp glares were all people received from you. You got others avoiding you in return, it was a give and take situation that benefited perfectly on both sides – perhaps more on your side. It worked as a repellent to kept everyone off your radar. And you liked that. You enjoyed being left alone. You found peace in your own solitude, away from other people. You were never exactly fond of people, either way.

Yang Jungwon was certainly a different breed.

Maybe it was the challenge that he liked, at first. You; the unwavering and ‘unbeatable’ challenge that provoked him – enticed him. That kept him coming. You were a brick wall, and he was someone who had the world at the palm of his hand.

But you don’t know how his intentions changed along the way.

You don’t know what made him change his mind – or what part of you that he saw that made him choose to do so, but it wasn’t of any use to figure out how.

Because he wanted you, now.

And he would ever-so-bluntly admit that.

All your efforts of shrugging him off made him fight harder for you. It was useless. The more you would curse at him with the harshest words just made him want to tag along by your side even more with that boyish grin never leaving his face.

He was a weird one.

“You know, you’re not as mean as how the people label you as.”

“And you’re more annoying than they claim you to be,” you don’t crack an amused smile. Jungwon wonders if he’s ever seen you smile – or even wear anything else of an expression that didn’t look bored, annoyed, angry, or enraged. He takes a moment to visualize how beautiful you would look when you smile and decides that he’ll do anything to see that happen. Just like that.

“You keep tossing me away,” he defended himself, the corner of his lips tugging downwards in the smallest pout.

“You keep coming back,” you retorted back, eyes shooting daggers.

By the look of his face, you realize your response wasn’t the best. “I’ll keep coming back to you,” he finishes. A lopsided grin. His brain was wired differently.

You didn’t hold back your prolonged suffering exhale.

It was a careless remark.

Such a recklessly made promise.

… ᵉⁿᵈ ᶠˡᵃˢʰᵇᵃᶜᵏ ↺

↻ … ᶠˡᵃˢʰᵇᵃᶜᵏ

[ JUNGWON’S POV ]

No one loves you like Yang Jungwon.

Whenever you’re blabbering about something with the biggest smile on your face, every time at that exact moment Jungwon knows that no one can ever be as fucking in love you like a dumb plain sheet of white paper like he can. Nor can they get to know you - or the 2 am you. They wouldn’t get to know how beautiful you look with the one side-lamp illuminating a side of your face - and the little things that come along with it, it’s only him.

It’s only him.

But when he stares into your eyes, he knows it all too. No one is as bad for you as Jungwon is either, he believes, and it fucking destroys him as he holds onto you tighter, his hands slightly trembling. He can’t lose you, he doesn’t want to, and he doesn’t know the person he’ll become if he ever does. He doesn’t know if he’ll even make a day after it.

Why didn’t he think that there would ever be an end to a sweet dream?

Yang Jungwon is your first, but someone else is going to be your last.

Someone else that wasn’t him.

He muffles the sound of the soft cries that escape him as you peacefully sleep next to him in his tight hold, unaware of what’s to come.

He’s everything that he promised you he would never be.

… ᵉⁿᵈ ᶠˡᵃˢʰᵇᵃᶜᵏ ↺

THE NEXT WEEK

Riki must’ve placed some sort of curse on you for this to happen.

You could vividly imagine his shit-eating face with his loud laughter already.

Whatever witchcraft or shitty attempt of ‘fate’ this was, Nishimura Riki was going to be the cause of your death. Though this has barely anything to do with him, you can’t think of anyone else that brings that much bad luck to you. You’re seriously starting to think the world is unreservedly just fucking with you for entertainment.

Just when you thought you were never going to see him again.

Yang Jungwon stands at the front of the classroom, leaning on one foot with a backpack slung over his one shoulder. You almost facepalm, this was some Egyptian curse that was going to follow and haunt you, wasn’t it? Perhaps the ghost haunting you was in the form of your ex-boyfriend.

Of course, the new student had to just be him.

You never thought you would ever see him again. Thankfully, he doesn’t notice you and sits the farthest from your area. You keep your head focused on the individual work assigned to the class. If this whole thing could keep up, you could probably spend the next semester without him knowing you’re in the same class, then, you could hopefully change classes by the next - it wouldn’t be so bad. You didn’t have to acknowledge him.

That is, until the Professor starts assigning him roles and tasks. “There are the modules for you to read, and then around four individual minor projects to keep up with. The fifth individual project, however, majorly affects your grade,” he pauses, lightly smacking his lips as he scans his student list.

He flips through papers as he continues, “since you’ve missed most of the term, I’ll be pairing you up with Lim Seoyeon,” he drags the last word, scurrying through his papers to find another name, “and Y/L/N Y/N. Both are only lacking their thesis papers, while the others are still lacking to submit three projects, so it would be most convenient for her compared to the rest.”

Your stomach churns, feeling sick. Physically cringing, you felt like creating an uproar. Wherever Yang Jungwon goes, trouble always follows; this simply could not be happening to you. Lord, it was the least convenient to you.

This world couldn’t hate you this much.

You wanted to curse any of the gods above you placed you in this shithole, being beyond frustrated and unwilling. Anyone but him. You could only mournfully regret passing all your projects in advance, it was ironic. You get yourself into fucked up situations for being a good student? What is this university?

The Professor doesn’t clarify anything with you - nor does he justify the situation and the injustice, but only throws a nod in acknowledgement in your direction before he waves at Jungwon in dismissal - excusing himself from the classroom.

Your eyes could almost bulge out.

What was happening . . . ?

Jungwon’s eyes sweep over the room before he finds you, but you note how he doesn’t look the least surprised to see you. He stares, trying to discern your expression, but you once again break eye contact within a second.

You were in hell.

You had no option to stalk up to the teacher’s desk to bargain when the professor wasn’t there in the first place. You were fucking stuck with him. You felt the burning flames when he got up to make his way to you, and as he stood right in front of you. Choking to death because of a meatball in live television seemed like a much peaceful idea that kept most of your remaining dignity.

Maybe if you kept your head buried with studies, he would go away.

“Y/N,” a voice acknowledges you.

Fuck, you could remember that voice anywhere.

“It’s nice to see you.” Yang Jungwon.

You made a noise in response.

The feeling was not reciprocated.

You hate the way he sounds.

Like he wasn’t the same person three years ago.

You forcefully nod curtly at him, and you’re drowning.

Suddenly, we are strangers again. An unwanted stranger. There was no other option rather than tolerating him until it was all fine. You could do this. You didn’t want to, but you had to, otherwise you’d be at the polar end of the classroom by now if you had the choice.

But you chose to ignore him: Ignore the fact that he sat right next to you in close proximity, ignore the fact that you could smell his cologne - the familiarity of it and how it smelled like home, and ignored him like he never existed when he tried asking questions. In your defense, either they were a waste of time to answer, or they could easily be found in the textbook.

“Hi, I was wondering if –” Ignore it.

“Do you know where the questions for –?” Ignore it.

“Don’t you think this project is pretty difficult –?” Ignore it.

And you turned a blind eye to the fact that you disregarded him because you didn’t know if you could control yourself.

Seoyeon was a lifesaver, managing to keep you sane as she voluntarily chose to step in to help Jungwon out after hearing all his questions directed to you left unanswered. You wouldn’t know what you would do if you were forced alone with him. She reads the room but doesn’t question anything.

You tell yourself it was anger that made yourself this way.

Blind consuming anger.

You hate how Jungwon could still manage read you after all this time.

A quiet and gentle question, “Y/N, are you mad at me?”

You barely react, but your eyes squint on their own. You weren’t going to lie nor deny it, you do really wish he hadn’t chosen to interact with you. Staring blankly at your laptop screen, you don’t move. A hushed voice - a subconscious that you swore you lost long ago - in the back of your head whispers an answer before you force yourself to shove it down. You almost scoffed; are you mad at him? What kind of a dumb question is that?

He was nothing but an ass, he hadn’t changed.

“No, why would I be?” You answer brusquely, your tone signifying that you were keeping a distance from him without having to say it.

You hope the cue was taken.

There was no need to keep the friendliness with him – you weren’t obligated to. Formalities were all there was left. At least you would treat him with the respect that you were scraping your skin out for, right? Whatever you had with him - it was over. It was long gone.

You refused to be controlled under the palm of his hand ever again.

You swiftly pack your belongings and left him without a work or glance to spare his way the second you hear the bell signal the end of the period right on time. You don’t even bid your classmate, Seoyeon, goodbye. You’d apologize to her later and explain things to her, hoping she’d understand and lend a helping hand.

It’s been two years and the minute he shows up, you find yourself crumbling and unable to control yourself, and that frustrates you. You’re slipping.

Being around him was a waste of energy.

You remind yourself that you feel nothing.

He was a stranger to you now.

Once again, you walked away from him, gripping the strap of your backpack tightly in sheer annoyance and vexation. Mind racing, you try to find a reason; why was Yang Jungwon in your major and university and what in the heavens above does he want from you?

LATER

Riki roars in laughter, his hand slapping his knee as he nearly falls off the chair. You were almost tempted to push him off.

“You think it can’t get any funnier than that, but it does!” he pretends to wipe away a fake tear, “you ignored him all the way through!” he bursts into fits laughter once again.

“Poor guy, getting the silent treatment from someone like Y/N on your first day at college is depressing,” he empathizes, though it doesn’t sound by any means sincere. Nothing about Nishimura Riki is sincere. “At least I’m not the only one Y/N treats like shit!” he notes positively with a beam on his face, but you’re not sure if that’s anything that’s supposed to be of positive news.

You whack the back of his head, and he whines. “When have I ever treated you like shit, you dumbass?”

“I’m taking this as a form of harassment,” he grumbles.

You stick your tongue out at him mischievously, “Oh, boo-hoo, you big baby, ‘s not like you don’t bully the hell out of me,” you roll your eyes, “and help out and do something about Jungwon, will you?” you ask him for a favor, your tone indicating exhaustion.

He furrows his eyebrows at you, “What’d you want me to do - bury his body? Doll, I barely even know the guy.”

You swing your arms - shooing something nonexistent away for gesturing, “Just keep him away! I don’t know, do one of those stupid ideas that you always come up with. I can’t stand seeing his face,” you complain, almost childishly stomping your feet in outrage. This was unlike you.

He lowly whistles, “I was really hoping for some real kind of exes-to-lovers type of k-drama lead coming to life,” he comments, and you muster the biggest disgusted glare at him. He only shrugs his shoulders with a mere ‘hey-what-can-you-do?’.

“However, there’s a …” he trails off, lighting up like a lightbulb with an idea in mind already.

You raise a brow, “A what?”

He looks at you with a grin, suggestively wiggling his eyebrows, “We can fake-date.”

You were dumb to ask him for ideas. You groan. “Not again.”

“C’mon,” he probes you, tugging at your arm. Was he really that bored with his life to want to fake-date you?

You blankly stare at him, deadpanned. “You get dumber and dumber the more I talk to you,” you don’t hold back from telling him, receiving a dirty scowl thrown at you, “I’m serious! Isn’t that what people do whenever one of their exes show up?”

Squinting at him, you ask, “Just how many fanfics have you been reading?”

He crosses his arms, “Make fun of me all you want, but we both know that those ideas never fail,” he huffs, “you wanted him gone, didn’t you?” he tries to resonate, “Everyone thinks we’re already a thing anyway, it won’t be too hard, or would it be much of a trouble if we just went on with it. We’re basically pros at this dating thing, aren’t we?”

You pinched the bridge of your nose, “Yes, and getting back at him would feel rightfully good as hell and all but,” you sigh in exasperation, hating to be the one to ruin the fun, “doing that would mess everything up even more, I’m sure. We’d be the ones ending up as the dumb fools in the situation. Did you already forget the time we fake dated to get that girl obsessed over you off your back? And how it backfired on us?” you stated, and Riki’s thoughtful silence justified your stance.

You’d rather die the most undignified death than have Yang Jungwon win the second time around, and that was not happening under Nishimura Riki’s watch.

“If I could just turn into a wizard or anything like that and ‘magic’ him away,” you plopped an arm up on the desk, resting the side of your cheek at the palm of your hand, “probably turn him into a damn ugly and useless broomstick while at it, too.”

Riki lets out a humorous short laugh at the sight of you, “Cheer up, princess,” he slings an arm around your shoulder, poking your cheek, “I’ll help you too, and I’ll beat him up whenever he tries to go near you; hot sexy Nishimura Riki cares about your cute dumbass,” You bump your hip playfully toward his. I’m not leaving you alone, is what he was trying to say.

He’d excuse it as simply returning the favor that he asked from you. The time when the both of you fake-dated, and it backfired – forcing you to reach extreme measures that went on for months.

Right, you had Riki. And he wasn’t going to just ditch you, not like him. He’s stayed firmly next to you for the past two years through all the shit you put him though (and all the shit he put you through). Riki may have been a rascal, but he was nothing compared to how shitty Yang Jungwon was.

You simply just had to keep going and help Jungwon out in certain parts while interacting the least you could and ignore him (or preferably call Riki to tell him off, he’d love to finally be given the chance to annoy the shit out of someone) whenever he tries anything funny. As soon as it was over, you’d do your stay out of his way and pretend like nothing happened. After all, he was the one who left. If anyone was trying to run away, it’d be him.

Everything was going to be fine. You didn’t care.

It was no big deal; no extensive measures were needed.

A sharp inhale.

You didn’t know if you were lying or if you were telling the truth.

[ now playing ◃◃ ⅠⅠ ▹▹ yellow by coldplay ]

↻ … ᶠˡᵃˢʰᵇᵃᶜᵏ

Jungwon liked to follow you around.

He also liked dragging you along with him with whatever excuse he could come up with. You never could really decipher what that oddball was thinking, just when you thought you caught up to him, he surprises you with something new every day.

Lee Heeseung, your senior, was discussing that week’s event that the school was holding with you when Jungwon swoops in and drags you away without second thought, “Sorry, hyung! Gotta borrow her today ~” he throws a grin, and Heeseung could only roll his eyes, staring in playful disbelief after the both of you, “ya, that’s what you said the last three times too!”

Jungwon gives the kind of pleading look you know Heeseung couldn’t resist, “I swear I’ll pay you back with free lunch, hyung!” he yells back. You were used to being dragged away or trailed around by him; it wasn’t anything of the ordinary. He winks at you.

No matter how hard you would try to avoid him or threaten him, he was always looking at you with the most mischievous silly and crazy ideas in mind.

On the other hand, he didn’t really enjoy the idea of you hanging out with other guys.

Could you call him delusional? You really wanted to.

And then there was this other instance, where Jungwon had sulked behind you the whole period, making noises that surely irritated you whilst you interviewed Park Jay for a class paper, who was a part of the varsity team. It forced you to spend the entire day with him for the interview, which Jungwon did not seem to like. It came to the point where you had to embarrassedly excuse yourself from the number of huffs and noises he was making. Jay was left giving confused looks, completely distracted from the whole topic that the whole interview was pointless no matter how hard her tried to ignore Jungwon.

“What is your deal?” You hissed at Jungwon in annoyance as soon as you scurried away from the varsity team, “you completely embarrassed me over there, you rascal!” He doesn’t hear you. He seemed deep in thought, as if he was battling with himself. Jungwon faced you with the biggest frown - looking more distraught than ever, “You don’t like him, right?”

Your mouth slightly hangs open, thrown off-guard. What?

“He isn’t your type, isn’t he? He doesn’t look like it. You’d never go for a guy like him.” He looked ridiculous – and it wasn’t much of a shock to you. An idiot and a loser. You figured it’d only be a matter of time before he completely lost his mind. It was as if he was talking to himself. You lightly whacked his arm, trying to get some sense into him and snap him out, “What are you talking about, you rascal?”

He bores his eyes onto yours, “Whatever. I won’t let you, anyway. I’ll stay by your side you ‘till the day I die if I have to.” His eyes were set with firm determination, yet you didn’t bother pressing on - being sure he was up to no good, as usual.

He was speaking, but you couldn’t piece together what he was trying to imply. You didn’t really care either, he was a weird guy. Still, you were frustrated at him for just having to mess everything up for you again, “I can’t believe you,” you muttered incredulously, turning your heel to start walking away from him – you were done with this boy.

“Hey – angel, no, wait. Where are you going –?”

… ᵉⁿᵈ ᶠˡᵃˢʰᵇᵃᶜᵏ ↺

↻ … ᶠˡᵃˢʰᵇᵃᶜᵏ

Admittedly, you didn’t hate Yang Jungwon as much when you had first met him, but the dislike started to grow at a profound rate when he started acting as a nuisance the more occasions he stuck around.

You weren’t exaggerating. Jungwon was just the epitome of overbearingly unable to understand social boundaries and your extreme dislike of having him in a 2-mile radius near you.

And you had your dignity, but Jungwon was an entirely different topic. Hiding from him in the gymnasium lockers was your last resort.

“Gotcha,” a cheery voice slides in beside you out of nowhere. Your heart almost jumped out of your body in fright, did he always have to jump-scare you out of nowhere?

“Seriously –?!”

“Stop playing hide and seek with me, angel. I’d love to play this game some other time with you but not now! We have somewhere else to go!” He has got to be shallow. Or dumb. Really dumb. You don’t know. As much as he loved blabbering endless nonsense around you that never seemed to make sense and was barely capable of leaving your side, you barely knew anything of him.

You glowered at him, “I’m not playing hide and seek with you, you rascal! I’m obviously avoiding you –!”

He pats the top of your head before gently grabbing your hand, interrupting your nth effort to knock some sense into him. “Let’s go! It’s my turn for a Y/N day.” he points forward, leaving the library baggage hall that he found you hiding in. A Y/N day? What were you to him, an item? You groan, sounding sorrow. You really thought you got away from him this time. “Yah, we’re going to miss class!”

You didn’t even know why you bothered.

Jungwon tilts his head, giving you a look as if to tell you to not worry, “We’re going to the river today, anyway. I brought my boombox with me,” he proudly tells you, and you aggravatedly sigh, feeling defeated. You swore you made all the measures needed to carefully avoid him, thinking you were finally left alone.

“Why do you always bring me along?” you deadpan, trying to wriggle free from his grasp. He was probably going to insert another flirtatious line or something among those actions. Why don’t you ever leave me alone?

You never really got it. Any of his interests, in fact. Why was he so determined to pursue you? There were countless of girls who were more of a ‘challenge’, and they were all the more interesting than you, with no doubt. What did he see in you? “Don’t you have any other friends?” you pulled a face at him. Jungwon has been by your side for such a long time that you grew accustomed to his presence, still, you weren’t going to admit that.

“I don’t want to hang out with them, I want to go with you,” he simply explains, as if it was the most obvious answer.

You furrow your eyebrows at him, irritated, yet curious as you stress, “Why?”

He pauses, still looking ahead as he guides you forward, “Being around you makes me happy.” You simply glance at him and the look he has makes you shiver.

Jungwon was always straightforward. There was not an ounce of shame in that man’s soul. He said what was on his mind without any filter, and he also had a peculiar way of thinking, which in terms, you guess, made him intelligent.

A beat passes, and you don’t find a retort to throw back at him.

Jungwon was like this beaming sunshine and busted in the dark hell you drowned yourself in.

Even if you enjoyed the darkness.

He always knew where to find you.

He found you.

… ᵉⁿᵈ ᶠˡᵃˢʰᵇᵃᶜᵏ ↺

Every year.

Every moment.

Jungwon was always there.

Yang Jungwon always knew where to find you, it was like his sixth sense. He could spot any of your bullshit or anything that you were hiding from him in a mile radius. There was no bother in hiding from him. He would always pop up by your side with a lopsided smile, carrying his guitar around and whining to you because he wanted to do something fun.

He was a bothersome child.

He was there in the times you didn’t want to see him, and he was there in the times where you needed someone but there was no one to turn to. It was as if you could summon him, you would always retort.

Making up excuses was his specialty, he always seemed to disregard everything to tag along with you. He made crazily creative alibies that never seemed to run out just in order to be able to stay by your side.

Until one day he stopped.

Until one day he ran out of reasons.

So, where was he and what was he doing two years ago when he left you the moment you needed only him the most?

One day, you woke up and he was gone. You haven’t heard from him since. Not a trace left. Not a ghost left to haunt you. And somehow, that haunted you even more.

Where did you go?

↻ … ᶠˡᵃˢʰᵇᵃᶜᵏ

You liked the pastries that Jungwon used to make for you.

You remember that he made them for you a lot. Whenever you did a job well done on a simple test or if you overworked yourself, you always found a box of your favorite flavors on your desk or locker the following day. You didn’t have to question who it was from; he didn’t have to say anything.

You weren’t accustomed to having that kind of treatment. A simple job done is merely a simple job done. There hasn’t been much of a pat on a back or a congratulatory party for the little achievements, and that was completely fine you. However, that wasn’t the case for Jungwon.

Puzzled, you held up the mysterious box, “What is this?”

“Sweets. Try them and tell me if you like them or not,” you could tell that he was anxious in anticipation. You try and hand it back over to him, “Oh, I’m not really in the mood for sweets, you can go ahead and give them to Minju though, she loves -”

“I didn’t make them for Minju,” he stands in front of you, sort of dejected and earnest. That was a new look on him. His face seemingly somewhat deflated, and somewhat embarrassed. He scratches the back of his head awkwardly, refusing to meet your gaze as he shakes his head and changes his mind, trying to reach over the box to save his dignity in the situation.

Your eyes slightly widen, processing, “Wait,” you withdraw your extended arm, looking back at the box, pointing to it, “you made this?”

“It’s not really any -” Jungwon starts, reaching out for the box for him to take back but you swat his arm away.

“You should’ve said so, dumbass! I love things homemade,” you explain lightheartedly, your eyes glittering once you open the box to reveal damn beautifully decorated chocolates. Your mouth formed an ‘o’ shape from the blow, almost gasping.

He did that?

“You don’t have to act all that, you know,” Jungwon adds, and when you spare him a glace, you realize he’s being serious.

You roll your eyes at him, ready to punch his arm. Acting? He wishes! Was he just wanting more compliments from you, or did he really believe that his baking didn’t look like the prettiest things ever? They looked too beautiful to eat but you didn’t know if you could manage to restrain yourself from eating something that looked so delicious. “Shut up, look at that! Are you, like, a world-renowned baker or something?”

As soon as nearly half of the box was eaten by you, you mentally felt something hit you, like a pang. Though you couldn’t exactly discern what. You felt something, a lurch of it. A swell of happiness, a swell of being seen, a swell of not being alone, not anymore. “Jungwon?” you looked at him.

He leaned his weight against the wall in the front of you, taking one of his earpieces off, “Mm.”

“Thanks,” It was casual, but you meant it. You really did. He could read it from your eyes. He probably spent a lot of time making these, you thought. Then you realize that’s all he ever did to you; spend his time on you.

He’s sincere. A troublesome rascal, definitely. But sincere. It’s funny how it took him to just make some homemade sweets for you to see and realize, “you’re not that bad.”

You don’t know if you left him speechless, but you walk down the hallway with him staring after you. Words left unspoken.

Something new had changed then.

You didn’t know what to call it.

But it felt good.

… ᵉⁿᵈ ᶠˡᵃˢʰᵇᵃᶜᵏ ↺

[ now playing ◃◃ ⅠⅠ ▹▹ meet me at our spot by the anxiety ]

THE NEXT MORNING

[8:04 am] unknown number: hi good morning

[8:04 am] unknown number: it’s jungwon :)

[8:05 am] unknown number: i just wanted to wish u a good day

[8:06 am] unknown number: i’m really proud of u

Four text messages to ruin the start of your day.

And in addition, there it was: the exact familiar box of pastries on the desk you were at yesterday that morning.

You nearly got yourself nauseous at the sight.

Were you dreaming?

Blinking it off, you snap out of it. You scoff, Jungwon was more shameless and a lot bolder than you thought. What was the box supposed to signify? ‘I’m proud of you’?, ‘I’m sorry’?, or an ‘I miss you’? Either way, you never knew Yang Jungwon could ever stoop so low.

Two years and the first thing he does is give you a box of sweets, was he thinking it’d pay back all the shit he pulled? Bribe you with sweets and suddenly everything would be okay?

Your resentment for him grew even more.

Anger was a better feeling to experience other than any of the other emotions.

At the side of your eye, you could see Jungwon. You pretend not to, and you try so hard. You don’t miss the glances he throws you, he was probably waiting for your response.

Surely, he should expect from you that the response was going to be nothing good. Does he know you at all?

Throwing it away seemed over the top, but you didn’t know what the rest of your options were. You hesitate, eating it would only make him believe that everything’s okay. And in case Jungwon didn’t get the memo: everything is not okay.

This won’t hurt you.

You toss the box to someone else; your hands slightly freeze on its own for a moment when you realize Jungwon was watching. Only for a moment.

You weren’t taking his bait.

You didn’t want it.

You don’t look at him, and you don’t bother to see his reaction. Biting down your tongue, you jabbed your pen down the desk forcefully - you ignore the sense of guilt. He asked for it.

It takes a bit more effort to remain nonchalant this time.

Jungwon was getting in your nerves. Again.

LATER

You were dragged into a library group filled with people you barely knew of by Ningning and Seoyeon. You recognized Jake Sim from chemistry class, and a few others that you weren’t entirely confident you knew the name of. Jungwon was there. Of course, he had to be.

Though you were an expert at turning invitations and confessions down, you really weren’t much of the action type. Some would call you the ‘all bark, no bite’ type, but that was mostly because people who ensued and pressed on having it their way was just stubborn.

Most of your life, people went along your bark, it was rare that anyone went against it – but not impossible. Yang Jungwon.

The name flashes by your mind involuntarily as if it was a burn.

As if your mind works on its own, you find yourself staring at him – he paid no interest in the conversation as he mindlessly scrolled through his phone, bored. The only word he had ever said was when he had assertively stated that he wanted the seat that was close to yours. He had also joined the conversation and firmly voted against Jake sitting next to you. What a problem boy.

[02:44 pm] yang jungwon: u look good today

You were bored, but definitely not bored enough to be willing to immerse yourself into that mess.

You were entirely out of the group’s topic of conversation yourself, immersing yourself all in your head and thoughts until a girl named Naeun – you think – waggles her brows at you. “What about you, ms. ‘most-popular-with-guys’?”

“How many of them did you turn down this week?” Lee adds into it lightheartedly, poking fun.

Jungwon’s attention is immediately averted to you – and you hate that you can feel his gaze boring into your face.

You feel more uncomfortable than ever, trying to argue with them, “What? That’s not true—!”

Ningning’s eyes glint in mischievousness, taking in your denial as something you were embarrassed about as she joins into the conversation. But it wasn’t, not entirely.

You were highly uncomfortable. “Don’t deny it. You’re more than just ‘popular’ with guys. I swear I saw with my own eyes at least two guys try and hit you up on this exact library alone from the past few days.”

You could hear chortled laughter from around you.

You know none of the voices belonged to or were from Jungwon.

You’d rather suffocate.

“I heard you were pretty popular with the guys during your high school years too!” Seoyeon chirped. You felt nauseated. Where did they even hear that information? You incredulously retorted to yourself.

“D’you date any of them?” Lun from literature class pipes in, interested. You feel your face turn hot against your will. “Any hotties you can introduce me to?” someone adds into it suggestively, clearly enjoying the topic of discussion.

Your face starts to sour, reeking of irritation.

“Ooh! I remember hearing Y/N dated a guy during high school. That’s probably why she wasn’t able to date much?” Ningning suggests, and you wanted to kick her out of the room. Was anyone just not able to pick out on social cues? Was everyone not able to notice how uncomfortable you looked?

Seoyeon’s eyes enlarged in alarm, “Y/N dated before?” Despite the distressing situation, you almost slipped out a laugh, you were always known for your strong dislike towards romance and men and you liked it that way. You guess the impression still hasn’t changed.

He’s in the exact same room right now, you wanted to spit out. Your face hardens, but you don’t say anything.

“What’s the big deal? We were barely anything anyway.”

Ningning does not get your clue, instead, she looks more confused than ever. “Huh? From what I heard; you both were pretty serious.”

“You never told me anything about him,” Seoyeon complains, grabbing your arm and repeatedly swinging it around. With everyone’s attention on you, your usual ‘i-hate-everyone’ façade falls into dust.

You snort, keeping your tone casual, “About what? He was barely anyone special, in the first place.”

A bunch of unanimous curious ‘oohs’ were heard around the room. “Oohlala, spill. What made the relationship end?”

You take a thoughtful pause, as if it was the first time you were giving it thought, “He was selfish.” A shrug.

You ensure that the whole table hears your answer, especially him. Ningning scrunches her nose in distaste at your answer, “Ugh, typical. Boys really aren’t shit.”

“You’d give your entire world to them, and they decide that it’s not enough. Discontented assholes.” Lee comments with a bunch of insults thrown away without regard, and the Seoyeon pretends to vomit at the mention of boys. “Dirtbags. His loss,” is all she says.

You really don’t have any idea of what to do in this situation.

A strangled noise escapes Jungwon, and he covers it up with loud coughs. He looked like he’s just been badly burned, and you try to casually shift in your seat. The rest of the group takes it as a cue to ask him the same question as well, figuring he wanted to be included.

“And what about you, newbie?” Jake notices, an effort to try to get Jungwon to feel included. “Ever dated before?”

He stares blankly in response. A glance your way, and it takes a fraction of a second for you to avert your eyes away. You hope no one caught that. A moment. Or two. Until, “No, never.” Casually, with a helpless shrug before his attention was back on his phone. He doesn’t even regard that you were ever a part of his past.

Your insides clenches on their own.

That was it. The signal. You were back to being notoriously known for your cold behavior, good grades, and popular game with men, while Jungwon was back into his reputation of being a cute and care-free affectionate and loveable brat that would never do anyone wrong.

Everything was back the way it started.

Rewind. A start over. Where Jungwon doesn’t get to see the nurturing, caring, childish, and mischievous side of you, and where you never got to see the depth to him: his coolness and his silence. The eyebrow lifts, his head-pats, his reliability, his loyalty, his promises, his stories, his determination – everything about him that everyone missed, that was simply nothing now.

We’ll never be those kids again.

Your phone buzzes.

[02:52 pm] yang jungwon: i figured u didn’t want them to know.

[02:54pm] yang jungwon: are you mad?

Both your eyes meet in the midst of the others bickering with each other.

All the remnants of history erased.

↻ … ᶠˡᵃˢʰᵇᵃᶜᵏ

[ JUNGWON'S POV: 1 YEAR AGO ]

“I’ve been looking for you all night!” she skips, twirling in front of him, “What d’you think? I figured you might like this outfit.” She had an annoying voice, and was definitely way too clingy. Black long hair or something, honestly, any of the faces he’s seen were all only just blank and empty to him.

Jungwon doesn’t even regard her existence.

“C’mon ~” The girl drags, tugging at his arm. He doesn’t even know her name. He’s probably crossed by her more than a couple times with the way she was acting.

She was annoying. Not like you at all. No one was like you.

Jungwon was already in a sour mood. “You’ve been stuck at the couch all night, you lame-dummy!” She points a dragging finger to his chest, “No one wants to be a lame-dummy, c’mon, come with me! It’ll be fun,” she tries to persuade in a sing-song voice, inviting him in.

It doesn’t shake him by the least.

He shakes his head, shortly emitting a single scoff in irritation as he jerks away the hand on his shoulder. His tense facial features say everything. Without saying another word, he chooses to leave the room quietly and awkwardly without bidding goodbye to the other friends who invited him.

These parties were useless. Everything was useless. Every day was too boring and empty without meaning.

He had no place here.

This wasn’t where he belonged.

He damn well still belonged to that person he always has belonged to.

You.

… ᵉⁿᵈ ᶠˡᵃˢʰᵇᵃᶜᵏ ↺

[09:12 pm] yang jungwon: hello bo ;]

[09:12 pm] yang jungwon: i hope u had a good day :)

[09:17 pm] yang jungwon: i’m always here if u need me

[09:17 pm] yang jungwon: just so you know

[09:17 pm] yang jungwon: i’ll always be there

[09:20 pm] yang jungwon: and i hope i crossed your mind at least once..

read

A FEW DAYS LATER

You were beyond thankful to have Seoyeon around him to save yourself the awkward interactions.

She was the icebreaker. The only factor that allowed you to act as if Jungwon wasn’t there in the first place and ignore his existence. Given that she was an icebreaker, she was also clueless.

She had no idea of the hatred you had for him - or the reluctance to look his way, much more interact with him. It wasn’t her fault, but you wish you rather didn’t have to explain the situation to her as the only option for her to stop trying to get you and Jungwon to talk.

“Wasn’t yesterday fun? It was nice having new people around,” she brings up as a conversation starter. Jungwon was minding his business working on his project on the side, the both of you had your free time. You politely smile at her, and you know it looks genuine. Explaining things to her wasn’t ideal – you shudder that the possibilities that would happen once you’d confess the situation.

Maybe Jungwon was a private secret of your past that you were never meant to bring up to those in your present.

“That reminds me, who’s the group you hang out with? We really should hang out more.” She slightly frowns before adding, “You’re really fun!”

“You too,” you add with a half grin, and you genuinely mean it. You kindly nod in agreement with a laugh, desperate to end the topic – but Seoyeon doesn’t cease her intent of giving up her first question.

She smiles at you expectantly as she awaits for an answer, and though you know she’s really just trying to make friends, if awkward topics were all that she was going to be bringing up around you, you would rather not converse with her at all. “Oh uh, that question,” you forced a laugh that comes out awkward, “no one else, really.”

Her lips form a small ‘o’ shape, apologizing for intruding. She softly gasps, alarmed, “Really? To be honest, I think it’s because everyone’s intimidated of you. It was until a few seconds ago that the whole campus figured you had countless of friend groups. Me included.”

You furiously shake your head at her, making a dreadful face in which she giggles at, “Oh God, no.” you comment, “it’s really just me,” you pause, “and Riki of course. Riki. Me and Riki. No one else. Kind of a loner,” you coughed out an awkward ramble, but Seoyeon never even seemed to mind.

“That’s cool, neither way! I get to have you to myself,” she teases lightheartedly as she links her arm around yours.

You were too flustered to notice that Jungwon had heard everything.

THAT EVENING

[10:21 pm] yang jungwon: hi love

[10:22 pm] yang jungwon: you must be tired i hope u rest up tonight :)

[10:22 pm] yang jungwon: i’ve really missed u

[11:49 pm] yang jungwon: goodnight love, sweet dreams :) ♡

read

By the next day, at the end of class, you’re forced to work with Jungwon at the library for the afternoon. Seoyeon was running late by fifteen minutes. This was the only time you didn’t mind.

The air is cold, and the tension was cutthroat, you could suffocate, but you wouldn’t have it any other way. Starting a friendly conversation? Why even bother?

You decided to ask him straightforward the moment he tries to initiate conversation by asking you a question, cutting him off, “What are you pulling at?” you blankly stared at him, pokerfaced. Maybe you went off too aggressive, but his face slacks; he was definitely accustomed to your whole act of ignoring his existence, and probably never expected you to even spare a glance his way.

A long pause before he regains his composure, “What do you mean?” his voice is a lot quieter and controlled compared to the past. Now that you notice it, he’s changed in a lot of ways. He’s no longer the bright happy-go-lucky rascal that you were once familiar with. No longer the one who didn’t care about grades, but the one sitting beside you at one of the best universities. He’s … matured a lot.

“The messages?” cutting directly into it, your eyes narrowed on him, “what are you trying to pull at?” you interrogate him. Tell me lies. Tell me the truth. Tell me you’re leaving. Tell me you’re staying.

Surprise is written all over his face, catching him off gaurd, “They’re nothing,” he clears his throat, words getting caught in the midst of it. “I just thought … I, um,” he trailed off, avoiding direct eye contact.

Your hard gaze doesn’t falter, patience running thin. “Spit it out, Yang.”

He winces at your tone, and you wished you hadn’t seen that. “I just thought that you needed it. Not needed it exactly, but, well, I assumed - I wanted to let you know -” he doesn’t finish his sentence, but starts another one instead, “I just miss you,” he states, and he’s looking at you - you remember that kind of look. The kind of look that would once tug at your heartstrings.

Once.

You don’t know what Yang Jungwon is pulling at.

Hm.

You stare down hard at him - eyes narrowed, prospecting, judging, and surveying. You no longer tremble at his words. You don’t falter. Have you grown immune to them? Maybe you were sincerely and truly over him after all.

He was pulling at his charms. His thoughtfulness - the little aspects that’d make you believe that he actually cared; the things you so easily fell into. Not anymore. Not after you believed, once.

Once was enough. It’s all a simple game to him, isn’t it?

The day you break down in front of him and let him hold the strings again would be the day you would die.

Not showing a flicker of emotion, you nonchalantly tsked, irritated, “Don’t bother again, will you?”

Jungwon doesn’t say anything, but you feel his lingering stare.

Your settling glare on the textbook in front of you could burn holes. You let him go – you dismiss him, but he never leaves his spot.

Why does he always linger behind?

[01:03pm] yang jungwon: i don’t know if we should be alone together

read

[02:54pm] yang jungwon: i really can’t control myself when you’re around

read

[04:23pm] yang jungwon: i miss the old you

[04:26pm] yang jungwon: im sorry

read

How much was it going to take for you to admit that you felt the same?

[05:33pm] yang jungwon: just so you know i didn’t mean it that way

[05:33pm] yang jungwon: i just noticed that you’ve changed

[05:33pm] yang jungwon: of course you’ve changed

[05:35pm] yang jungwon: you don’t look at me the same anymore

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[04:47am] yang jungwon: hi bo

[04:47am] yang jungwon: im sorry but i cant

[04:48am] yang jungwon: i really cant let you go

message delivered

A FEW WEEKS LATER

It didn’t take much for her to piece together. She noticed the pattern of behavior from you, your sour and aggravated persona, and Jungwon’s desperate efforts, then figured you were probably his ex.

“You know,” she clicks her tongue, “the thing about love and hate is that there’s a very thin line between them.”

She squints, fingers fiddling around with a penny as she tries to explain, “they’re two sides of the same coin.”

You made a face. She’s been going about this for hours and showed no sign of stopping. Whining, you turn her way, “what are you taking about this time?”

A grin. She raises both her brows in surrender, “You guys got a lot of unfinished business.”

You give her a look, unimpressed.

“The guy nearly snapped his head yesterday the moment he heard you laugh because he wanted to know what you were laughing about,” Seoyeon stares down at you steadily, provoked that you managed to toss the fact over too easily.

You throw her a crumpled piece of paper, and she easily dodges your throw. “Sure.” you snort, barely feigning any interest.

“Cut him some slack! He was your ex for goodness’ sake, some feelings for him still have to be there at some point. You can’t hate your ex that much without actually-maybe-probably loving them,” she singsongs teasingly. This was lighthearted, you knew, but.

You deadpanned. Feelings.

She has got to be serious.

Some feelings still have to be there.

Your heart didn’t feel anything.

Not anymore.

She stares at you in the silence, faking astonishment.

Her mouth forms a small ‘o’, “You’ve got to be serious.”

You only blink at her.

“Stop … don’t you feel anything for him anymore? Or is it like … nothing at all?” Of course, she was talking about him, you knew that - but why were you suddenly caught off guard? This was crazy.

Nothing.

Nothing at all.

No one has ever asked you this question.

How were you going to answer that?

You resented him.

You were angry. More than pissed.

You hated everything about him.

Your face scrunches up in disgust at the thought, but you answer her question after a pause, “One thing I know for sure,” you start casually, pausing in consideration, “is that I don’t want to see that annoying face of his again.”

You meant every word, this time.

You were willing to do whatever it took for that to happen.

At that moment, Seoyeon then concludes that the both of you had unfinished business. Jungwon was clearly not over you, anyone with a mile radius could see that. The boy was drop-dead crazy for you.

The more you try and repress feelings, the larger it grows.

How cliché does that sound?

She tilts her head to the side, glancing your way. But in a way, she knew it wasn’t one-sided, either.

[ now playing ◃◃ ⅠⅠ ▹▹ all too well by taylor swift ]

↻ … ᶠˡᵃˢʰᵇᵃᶜᵏ

“Jungwon?” you whispered incredulously. Rubbing your eyes due to your half-asleep state, you leaned your frame against your door with your worry starting to alarm you awake. “What’re you doing here?”

Standing at your apartment door, your boyfriend appeared rugged, his eyes tired and drowsy. You noticed his clothes were still of what you saw him wear yesterday morning. your heart ached to see him in such a state, concluding he had spent the whole day producing, working, and overworking himself without rest. You hated whenever he did this to himself.

Seeing you frown, Jungwon pulls you to his embrace, wrapping you around his arms with a contented sigh, “Just wanted to see my baby,” he mumbles out incoherently, fighting through sleep, “I’ve missed you.”

You clung onto him, your face still at a cloudy state of haze – unreservedly astounded. Meanwhile on the other hand, Jungwon continues to laugh over your dumbfounded look. He pinches the sides of your cheeks, cooing over at you. As you try to wriggle yourself away, you found yourself embracing your figure back into his arms to squeeze his waist tightly in fear that he might disappear. He teases you at the action, lightheartedly calling you his little koala, but you don’t miss the endearing tone to his voice – or the way his breath hitches from your embrace.

“You’re here,” you managed to breathe out to yourself, burying your forehead against his neck. Squeezing your eyes shut, you desperately hoped to the gods above that the moment you opened them, everything wasn’t just going to turn out as another dream of yours. You could barely process much more comprehend what was going on, ‘he’s here, he’s here, he’s here’ were the only notions you could formulate by the slightest, chanting through your brainwork repeatedly for you to comprehend. Humorously, you didn’t wonder how he was possibly here, or why. He shouldn’t be - he was too busy.

You didn’t think about the fact that he’s supposed to be halfway across the world working on his production, and definitely not here. Inhaling his scent, your ongoing worries and stress had seemed to evaporate, your form relaxing almost immediately. He smelled like home.

The loud chatters and distinctive outside noise from people passing by that surrounded the both of you, along the fact that the both of you were in a public place – all had seemed to drown out and appear forgotten. You clung to his warm figure after months of being apart, out of all the days you’d secretly dreamed about him surprising you, you never figured today was going to be that day. You clasped onto him even tighter, your smile growing wider by the second, it’s been quite some time since you ever felt half this happy.

He let out a low vibrating laugh with your face pressed against his chest, engulfing you tightly around his hold whilst swaying the both of you side to side. It was little moments and acts of efforts like these that mattered most to you. You drowned yourself at the rhythm and sound of his heartbeat that spoke the words the both of you already knew; he had missed you.

“I promised, didn’t I?”

Maybe you were always too busy for Yang Jungwon when the both of you dated.

Maybe that was it.

Maybe that was the reason why.

Or maybe he simply always seeking attention from you, constantly and childishly. He complained about you studying too much as he started sulking alone was, he wandered around the place ‘miserably’, while you were trying to place your focus on your book, refusing to give into him again.

A little later and he tossed the fact that he had to pick up some errands, and you volunteered to help accompany him since he mentioned that he’d only be out for a while.

But after picking up the things he had acquired through his errands, the rain was against your luck and poured heavily. You cursed at yourself, having brought no umbrella with you. Looking at Jungwon, you could judge immediately by then that he didn’t bring one as well.

“Running for it sounds pretty good,” you suggested with a beam on your face, but you noticed how Jungwon huffed in disagreement, not approving of the idea; worrying that the rain might get you hurt or sick as he starts pulling out deliberate excuses and reasons.

“It’s too slippery out in the rain, you might fall,”

“Car accidents happen more often in the rain,”

“You’ll get sick, can you afford to be sick at a time like this?”

You ignored all his protests when you decided to just audaciously leave the store entrance before walking into the rain without any given warning.

He doesn’t say anything, and when you glanced back at him in question, you immediately noticed how visibly irritated he was with you misbehaving and ignoring him. Jungwon was always overly protective over you.

Though you appreciated it, his over-protectiveness wasn’t something you exactly needed at this time of your mid-terms. You just needed to study, and Jungwon could simply work on his music. The place you were at wasn’t too far from home, so it wasn’t exactly too absurd to make a run for it.

His eyes zeroed on you, giving no humor in his eyes, “Come back in here.”

You looked at him with fake-pleading eyes, “I left my notes back home,” you frowned.

“I don’t care. You are not getting sick.”

He wanted to sit the rain out, of course he did. But you didn’t know when the rain was going to stop, or if it ever showed any signs of stopping, in the first place. Just by your boyfriend’s tone itself, you knew you got yourself in trouble. That was not a good sign, he would always pull some crazy idea that would always try to teach you a lesson.

You didn’t move an inch from your spot.

Jungwon hurdled at you once he realizes that you were being stubborn, wrapping his arms around your waist securely regardless of the hefty downpour of rain, “Step another foot further and I’ll make sure you’ll never be touching your beloved notes again.”

“Ugh, Yang Jungwon, are you crazy?” you argued, trying to untangle yourself from him but his firm grip wouldn’t let you go.

“Jungwon, I’m serious! I really need to study, I have my exams—!”

“Aish, you’d be on your deathbed, and you wouldn’t even think of me at all, you would only care about studying!” he contested nonsensically as he dramatically complains.

You scowled at his comment, your face souring as you try wriggling yourself out of his grasp even harder, “Yah, you rascal!”

“Come back inside and I’ll let you go,” he conditions, a small grin showing that he had won. You glower at him, but having no choice but to subit and wait the next two hours by the porch of the store for the rain to subside. He covers you by towering in front of you, ensuring that you weren’t going to get hit by the rain.

Jungwon was a lot of maintenance - a lot of people would say, but he was adorable.

And most of all, he was yours.

… ᵉⁿᵈ ᶠˡᵃˢʰᵇᵃᶜᵏ ↺

PRESENT [ JUNGWON'S POV ]

Jungwon spends the rest of his night at school fixing up your science project, without an ounce of sleep.

He finds Sunoo dropping by the room, slightly jumping in surprise at the sight of him there. He covers his chest with his hand, “What the hell are you doing here?” he lightheartedly scolds him.

But he pauses squinting at him, “Were you . . .” his eyes widen, “Dude, did you spend the entire night here?” he asks Jungwon, bewildered. “Doing . . .” he tilts his head, taking a peek, and his mouth hangs open as he finally pieces things together, “-Y/N’s science lab project . . .?”

Sunoo’s eyes almost budge out of his sockets. “Isn’t this what Y/N’s been worrying crazy about –? How did you –?”

He couldn’t exactly admit that he’s overheard you complaining about your project and begging others to help you with it miserably. He knew you always took your grades seriously, but, how could he explain this to Sunoo of all people?

Jungwon looks conflicted, immediately standing away from your project. He was finished wish it, anyway. He just needed to get here undetected by you. Kim Sunoo was a problem, however. There was no way Sunoo wasn’t not telling you about this.

“Don’t tell her I did this,” Jungwon tells him, reading Sunoo’s next moves.

His eyes dart from the project to Jungwon. He frowns, confused. “Why not?”

Jungwon hesitates with his words, being careful. “Just because. Don’t.” What the hell can he say? The bell rings, and he panics.

“She has a hell of an ego, you know this. Tell her you fixed this or something. I don’t know. Make some shit up.”

He scurries out the lab but hangs behind at the entrance door for a few seconds.

Jungwon emphasizes what he’s told Sunoo. “I’m counting on you, bro.”

He slips away like a ghost.

Sunoo tells you that Ningning and Jake helped with your final lab project, and you believed it – eyes sparkling with relief and complete utter gratitude. You wondered how they got to finish the project in a day. They were the chemistry experts of the class, anyway – who were you to question them?

Sunoo sees Jungwon at the side of the room looking at you and your project. He watches him watch you. How happy you were with the project, and the endless showering of compliments. Was he really just . . . not going to tell you?

Sunoo takes a look at both you and Jungwon and scratches his head in utter confusion. What was going on with the both of you?

He has no idea what that boy is hiding.

A FEW DAYS LATER IN THAT WEEK

Jungwon really was getting in your nerves.

On your way to class, you did nothing but mind your own business when he swirls out of nowhere and pushes you aside, refraining you from entering the classroom. You furrow your eyebrows in annoyance, trying to wriggle away from his grasp, but his grip stays firm. He’s holding the sides of both your arms to let you stay in place, looking anxious and rushed. “Wait.”

“Yang Jungwon, what the hell?”

He tries to find words to say, but he can’t find any. “I . . . like the color of your hair. Did you dye it?”

Your stare is blank. “What?”

“I need recommendations. I might use it too, so –“

“This is my natural hair color.” you deadpan, without an ounce of friendliness, “now if you’ll excuse me –”

“No! Gah,” he lets out a frustrated noise, rushed, “. . . the speech report! I need help in –“

He was messing with you. He had to be.

“I don’t know what you’re trying to do,” you try to breathe in calmly, but you were talking through your gritted teeth. “You submitted your speech report last week,” you hissed, your patience running thin.

You finally wriggle yourself free from his grasp, and that was when the panic was evident in Jungwon’s features.

You barely get to move an inch before, “Do you still have hang-ups on me?” He rushes out of nowhere, an attempt of desperation.

What?

To say that you were at a loss for words was an understatement.

You freeze. Staring at him, dumbfounded.

Were you simply a joke to him?

What was he saying? He was desperate, willing to just have your attention anywhere else. You could not enter the room. That was his plan.

You were trying to regain composure. Clamping your jaw down hard, your eyes narrowed. “Please, kindly fuck off.”

You stalk away, pissed off.

As soon as he ensured that you were walking the opposite direction, and Jungwon heaves a small sigh of relief. At least.

He budges the door classroom open – the room he had noticed that a couple of asshats were trying to pull on harsh pranks on – and immediately, an old tray of leftover food spills from above, falling flat on the floor instead as Jungwon dodges it from anticipating this beforehand.

And you piece thing and thing together.

This was what he was driving you away from?

Because that could’ve been you.

His eyes settle on the group of bullies seated at the end of the room. He cracks his knuckles. Jungwon’s eyes have never been so deadly.

Jungwon comes in class later with a purple bruise coloring his upper left cheek, and a busted lip.

You don’t ask him the story, but instead, you assume the worst in him. Like you always do.

He’s up to no good.

He always was.

[08:12pm] yang jungwon: are you going?

[08:21pm] you: ?

[08:21pm] yang jungwon: oh hi love

[08:22pm] yang jungwon: are you coming to gyeonju tower tomorrow? i wanted to tell you in person today but you seemed like u were in a rush to leave

[08:24pm] you: ? what do you want

[08:25pm] yang jungwon: i wanted to explain things

[08:25pm] yang jungwon: and explain myself

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[08:53pm] yang jungwon: i want to make things right

[08:54pm] yang jungwon: please let me, bo

[08:54pm] you: im busy.

[08:57pm] yang jungwon: i’ll be waiting for you tomorrow at 1pm

[09:00pm] you: i said im not going.

[09:02pm] yang jungwon: just one chance, please

[09:04pm] yang jungwon: one last one

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You didn’t care, you weren’t going.

THE FOLLOWING DAY

You’ve decided that you wouldn’t go.

You won’t go.

You won’t go, end of discussion.

You spent the last night considering it until two in the morning. You’ve finalized your decision. “This is a no-brainer. Who does he think he is? I’m not giving him the satisfaction,” you rant morely to yourself - it was almost as if you werer trying to convince yourself instead.

You tug at the ends of your hair in frustration, hissing. Both Ningning and Seoyeon watches you in silent amusement after being told of the situation. The two were the only ones who knew about you and Jungwon, and the only two who you’ve been ranting to for the past two hours.

“I’m not going,” you repeat aggravatedly, exclaiming as you fling your arms. You pace around the room.

Ningning languidly lazes around the chair as you frantically pace around the room, “So you’ve told us for the past forty six times,” she can’t help but comment, fighting away her grin. You scowl at her, grabbing the strap of your bag to sling it around your shoulder.

“You guys are annoying. I’m leaving.”

Both Seoyeon and Ningning stare after you, waving you goodbye at your stressed state.

Ningning props herself up with her elbows, leaning her cheek with the palm of her hands as soon as you’ve left the room. She stares at Seoyeon, who was mindlessly scrolling through her phone, “She’s definitely going, isn’t she?”

Seoyeon tosses the bag of chips that she’s been hogging Ningning’s way - which she accepts immediately, munching down on the ones on her palm with disinterest, “Yep.”

LATER, 1 PM

You tug awkwardly at your sleeve, eyes searching for a certain figure in mind as they bunglingly dart around the place.

So, maybe you really did end up going to the tower. Just to check things out. That was it. And maybe see if he was there. If he really showed up. Hear what he wanted to say if it was important. Nothing more. You felt bad just leaving him alone - you weren’t like him, intentionally leaving someone on for hours to wait for you.

You had a conscience. You simply showed up because you didn’t want to be burdened by it.

You don’t know how long you waited on the first half of the period under the heat of the sun from the tower, but by the time you take out your phone to check the time, it was half past one in the afternoon.

Tick-tok.

You stare at your phone’s lock screen, expecting a text from Jungwon to pop up any second to inform you that he was probably running late. Anything.

An hour passes by.

You figure you’d give him another thirty minutes. Just another thirty minutes. If he wasn’t going to show up, you didn’t care anymore. You would leave.

It was past 30 minutes.

Another hour passes by.

Until rain starts to lightly drizzle.

Until clouds start to darken.

Until your legs start to ache.

And until you were soaking and clothes drenched with water in the pouring heavy rain.

Again.

Until it dawns on you.

Jungwon isn’t here.

He wasn’t coming.

He was never going to.

And there you were, standing alone stupidly – a fool. A fool who never learned her lesson after two years.

He was enjoying this; toying with you, he’s got to be.

You don’t know why you really expected anything else from him.

A heavy exhale.

You don’t know why you hoped you did.

You get a call from Jungwon by the evening. You were dumbly weak enough to easily get manipulated to answer the phone.

He sounded frantic, “Hello? Y/N? I’m so sorry, I wasn’t able to attend our meet-up. I’m - I’m really sorry, I was really planning to go -” You wish you could believe him.

“Yeah. It’s okay, don’t worry about it,” you sound too monotone for your words to sound like you meant them.

“I’m so sorry that you waited on me, I promise I’ll make it up to -” No more promises. No more, Jungwon. I can’t take anymore.

You harshly cut him off, oppressive. “What do you mean? I didn’t come. I told you I won’t, didn’t I?”

You still had your dignity. Lies were all that you had left. You’d lie just for Jungwon to not get that sense of satisfaction from you. You wouldn’t let him.

He is silent, “Yeah, I know.”

You inhale, vexed. Your eyes flicker around the room, feeling flighty with apprehension. “What’s up, anyway? What held you from coming?” you made an effort to sound as casual as possible bringing it up, as if you didn’t care. As if you didn’t spend the whole afternoon drenched in pouring rain waiting for him.

A long silent pause again. You could tell he was hesitating to answer.

He tries to let out a lighthearted laugh as he waves it off, "It’s nothing.”

It was nothing, again. It’s always nothing. Were you ever something - anything - to him?

It takes a moment for you to register his response. How effortlessly care-free he was about it. Your tone appears tight, “Okay. Well, it’s good that you weren’t able to go. I wasn’t there anyway.” You didn’t know what else to say other than stressing that you never came. That you didn’t care.

Lie.

“Oh,” is what Jungwon replies with, he sounded distracted - like his mind wasn’t in the conversation. He wasn’t interested in talking to you anyway, why did he bother calling?

You grit at your teeth, “I’m not a fool, Jungwon.”

You don’t know if he’s even listening to you, you start to question. It takes long for him to respond, “I know.”

He was being as short with his responses as ever. Was this what he called explaining himself? You doubt if he ever cared about making it up to you in the first place. You try to hide your disappointment in your tone with impatience, “Is that all? I’m gonna go now. I’m busy.”

You don’t wait for his reply.

You immediately end the call and toss your phone as far as you could.

You hope that was worth it for Jungwon.

[ JUNGWON’S POV ] . . . what really happened

Jungwon woke up three hours earlier that day.

When Jungwon was getting himself dressed, a boy from across the city was still sleeping through his alarm that he wasn’t able to set the night before. Meanwhile, a girl was waiting somewhere in the city’s lobby, waiting for her boyfriend to pick her up.

While that happened, Jungwon was on his way to a jewelry shop to buy you a gift. He was beyond excited to see you. The boy from across the city was still sleeping, but the girl’s boyfriend eventually came to pick her up. On the other side, Jungwon had forgotten his credit card, and had no other option to pay by cash.

By this time, the sleeping boy’s mother barges into the boy’s room to wake him up as he was late for class – and asking him if he spent another late night playing with his friends. The girl in her boyfriend’s car receives a text from her ex while her boyfriend stops by to pick up the cake they ordered for their anniversary.

Jungwon was nearly at the Gyeonju tower when the boy who was running late for class stumbled out of the house, got on his bike, and peddled as fast as he could. The girl was already texting her ex-boyfriend by this time, and before she could tuck her phone away as soon as her boyfriend got into the car, the boyfriend had caught her already.

All the while the couple slowly started to argue about her talking to her ex, Jungwon was stuck in traffic and anxiously waiting – frustrated. Though he had more than an hour to spare, he wanted to see you as quickly as possible. This was the moment of his life that meant most to him. The boy who was running late took a wrong turn because he was not on the right state of mind, still half-asleep.

The couple argued all the way to the girlfriend’s parents’ house while the boy in the bike running late was trying to find his way out of the unfamiliar place, completely flustered. Jungwon had already arrived at Gyeonju tower, parking his car before trying to fix up his hair. He never really cared about how he looked like, but Jungwon’s nerves were jittering. This was the first time he was so anxious to see you.

And finally, at the same time, the boy was too distracted to see the couple’s car in front of him – as well as the couple, as they were still too busy arguing. Jungwon had just gotten out of the car, crossing the road.

It all happened too quickly.

If the son had set his alarm the day before and wasn’t running late for his class, if the girl hadn’t picked up the call from her ex-boyfriend, if couple hadn’t been arguing while the boyfriend was driving, or if Jungwon didn’t take his time in the car mirror trying to make sure he looked good for you - then maybe he would’ve gotten to meet you that night.

Maybe he wouldn’t have gotten into that car accident.

Maybe none of this would’ve be happening right now.

Life is a series of multiple interactions, they said.

The next situation Jungwon finds himself in was lying still – unable to move – in the hospital emergency room with blood – his blood? – covered all over his clothes, and when he gains the smallest bit of energy to barely open his eyes, he feels like he’s lost everything all over again.

In spite of all the events, he remembers you.

Your smile.

And his promise.

But he blacks out.

The moment Jungwon awakes into consciousness, his first thought isn’t what he was doing in an emergency room hospital, all alone. It isn’t wondering why he had blood all over his clothes, or why his body physically hurt too much for him to move.

His first thought was you.

His first thought was always going to be you. Where were you? What-? He sees the small bag settled beside him, squinting at it - before realizing it was for you. For the meeting. Today. Shit. In less than half a second, he ignores the pins and needles of his skin feeling like it was being stretched out just to reach his phone and dial your number.

“Hello? Y/N? I’m so sorry, I wasn’t able to attend our meet-up. I’m - I’m really sorry, I was really planning to go -”

Your tone interrupts him midway, seemingly clipped and tight. “Yeah. It’s okay, don’t worry about it,” were you mad? Guessing by the tone of your voice, you seemed upset. Lord, he begged for that one chance you gave him and he had to go through this out of all the occasions?

You pinches the bridge of his nose after running a hand through his hair, cursing inwardly. How many more chances could you give him? You would never believe him ever again. “I’m so sorry that you waited on me, I promise I’ll make it up to -”

Your response hits him right in the gut, harder and more painful than any of the stitches and bandages he had being freshly reopened. “What do you mean? I didn’t come. I told you I won’t, didn’t I?”

His throat constricts, eyes lowering as the grip on the phone tightens, “Yeah, I know.” He hangs his head low.

You shrug it off with disinterest, your tone indifferent. “What’s up, anyway? What held you from coming?”

He hesitates, glancing down at the patches of bandages and stitches. He doesn’t try to explain. He doesn’t want you to know. What could he say to cover things up? He tries to avoid sounding suspicious with a lighthearted laugh, “It’s nothing.”

God, it sounded fake.

Your indifference rings through his mind over and over again. Did you really not care about him anymore? Did you really mean it when you said you weren’t going to go? A sharp stab in the heart each time the thought rings through him.

A pause.

“Okay. Well, it’s good that you weren’t able to go. I wasn’t there anyway.”

“Oh,” was all Jungwon could respond with, he was beginning to feel dizzy - overwhelmed and exhausted. A sharp buzz rang deaf through his ears.

The room started to spin as you continued through the call – unaware, “I’m not a fool, Jungwon,” you remind him. Was it really the end?

Has he finally lost you?

He doesn’t know what to say, but he couldn’t deny the fact that it hurt. Everything hurts. Fuck. A long pause, “I know.”

“Is that all? I’m gonna go now. I'm busy,” you harshly end things, not bothering to expant the conversation or on the details. You don’t push him. You don’t care.

The line went dead.

A piece of him along with it died too.

Jungwon sits at one of the emergency room’s beds alone and he realizes that the hospital could heal all his physical wounds and scars, but he doesn’t think the internal pain he’s feeling could be treated.

A nurse that was passing by finds him passed out, unconscious, and unresponsive only long minutes later.

A WEEK LATER

Initially, you had planned to keep away from Jungwon at all costs the moment classes started again. He could suffer all he needed.

But.

You don’t see Jungwon.

Not that you cared if he was around - it was a relief to you that you didn’t have to deal with him, but didn’t you .. deserve an explanation?

No.

That’s right. An explanation from Jungwon for ditching you was something you would never get. That hasn’t changed, and you were a fool for believing otherwise.

You repeatedly sneak glances by his desk - anywhere, for a sign of him. It was useless to ask anyone else. His friends? When had Jungwon ever tried talking to somebody that wasn’t you?

Not that you ever took notice, either.

It’s been a week.

Seconds tick by slowly, and lectures drag in what seems like hours. It comes to the point where you almost decide on texting his number and demanding where he was. It took every part of yourself to manage to not do so.

Your notifications remained empty this time.

No messages. No calls.

He’s gone again.

THREE WEEKS LATER [JUNGWON’S POV ]

With a fractured arm and multiple wounds and stitches, Jungwon had to opt to wait three weeks before he was able to attend classes again.

He only looks forward to seeing your face.

To explain everything to you.

He messed up again.

Maybe you were looking for him? It’s been three weeks, maybe you had wondered for a fraction where he went all of a sudden? Maybe you were worried? Maybe you were concerned? Or maybe you didn’t care? Maybe you were celebrating right now?

He flinches that the thought.

He spots you by the hallways after his hour long search around the campus. You barely looked bothered at all. That was fine, Jungwon reminded himself. He walks his way towards you with the gift he had bought you weeks prior, when the accident had happened. The gift he had protected with his life to save, and had held on for weeks to give to you. If he wasn’t going to explain things, he at least wanted to give you the gift he had picked for you.

He thinks you’d look pretty in it.

However, as soon as he tries to open his mouth to speak to you once he was close enough for you to hear him, you coldly ignore him entirely. You pack up your things once you hear the bell, ringing just in time for classes to start. You barely even spare him a single glance.

You walk past him like was invincible.

Like you couldn’t care any less of what happened to him.

It turns out, you were never worried at all.

That fucking him hurt more than being hit by a car a hundred times ever did.

[01:24 pm] yang jungwon: im sorry

[01:29 pm] yang jungwon: can we talk?

[read]

You blocked yang jungwon’s number that day.

[JUNGWON . . . ]

Seoyeon made you laugh.

It was unintentional, he guessed. But she made you laugh. In a way. Other’s might’ve called it a snort. It was a goofy side-comment he made when you expanded the instructions on the chapter needed to be finished. He felt himself destructing and freezing while his heart soared and ripped itself apart. He swore he was flying while being drowned six feet under at the same time.

As someone who spent his entire life on music, Yang Jungwon has heard many sounds. Various melodies and tunes, but none of them were like yours. He’s been walking around tone-deaf for the past few years because it was like he forgot the way your laugh sounded and the way it made him feel like he could do anything.

It was like you immediately regretted it - laughing with him in the room, and maybe his emotions were written all over his face because Jungwon was losing you all over again when you disclose your emotions off once again from him. Then he’s all but greeted with a cold face - an effect of the mess he caused.

He remembers the time where you were his to call, and now, you couldn’t even stand to look at him - or be in the same room as him. He remembers the time where you would look at him and the way your eyes would light up, and now, he looks at your eyes for a fraction of a second and they’re dead. Once vibrant and easy to read - now empty and desolate. Nobody is home. They’re emotionless for him.

Your eyes only tell lies now.

You’ll never be like the way you used to be again.

To think that he ruined it. That he ruined a smile that ran so deep and had so much meaning. A smile that was always for him. A soul that had so much love and kindness for him. He shattered that. That was because of him.

He remembers the time where receiving ‘I love you’s from you were everyday like routines to you, and he compares it with the flash irritation that would cross your face and the petty tone of anger he would get from you every time he tried talking to you.

You’ve changed.

He doesn’t know what those two years have done to you.

What he’s done to you.

Maybe he really messed it up. Maybe he should run and leave and never see you again so he would stop hurting you and fucking you up over and over again. Maybe he should let you move on and let you be happy with someone else. Maybe he should just stop hoping because the gods above know that they don’t trust him with you alone.

It was killing him.

Jungwon couldn’t do any of that.

Getting to see you every day - it was already much of a blessing compared to the two years in the shithole he went through without you, waking up to feel nothing but empty - if it’s not endlessly torturing and tormenting himself for putting you through what he had to.

But couldn’t Jungwon be a little selfish? Just this once? Couldn’t he ask for a little bit more?

If Jungwon could admit, he never wanted much, nor has he asked for much either. To say the truth, he doesn’t care about ninety percent of his life: fuck his gods be damned ‘career’, fuck air and water and happiness and money.

Yang Jungwon was someone that had no interest in the world. He never really got to care about anything. But you. He met you. You were his first. You were all he cared about. You were all that really mattered.

And that was his world.

You were his world.

It’s been two years since he lost you - since he let you go for good, and that was worse than dying. Each moment was as if it was meant to come back at him and break his soul - or whatever’s left of it. All Yang Jungwon gives a damn about is you.

He was damn well still in love with you, and he was never getting you back.

He’s lost you.

And the separating distance between the both of you proves it better than anything.

[ now playing ◃◃ ⅠⅠ ▹▹ hold me while you wait by lewis capaldi ]

↻ … ᶠˡᵃˢʰᵇᵃᶜᵏ

THE TWISTING POINT

Jungwon wasn’t in a good mood today.

It was most likely because of work, so you didn’t want to question or pressure him into dwelling into it any further. You stayed smiling, knowing that whenever you were down, Jungwon knew exactly what to do. He needed sunshine.

You hear glass shatter, and loud clanging accompanied with it. You sprang upwards, racing to Jungwon’s aid to check yourself if he was hurt.

As you stared at the mess created, and the person who seemingly intentionally created the mess, you only stood by the doorway.

You knew him, he wasn’t the type to let his anger consume and get the best of him, nor was he the type to physically express his anger. Especially around you. Jungwon loved the idea of you seeing him as a laid-back unique oddball, and you’ve rarely ever seen him irritated or angry. You’ve never seen him like this, however.

You remained silent; your gaze downcast. Whatever happened in the studio today must have been seriously rough enough to affect him into a state like this.

The room is too silent. “Won?” He loves being called that name; he’s told you. It gets him erupting with happiness in no time, but why isn’t it working now?

Why does Jungwon’s eyes look so empty?

“Can you leave?” he asks you when you try to help clean up the broken shards of glass, finally uttering a word after the first time you’ve seen him today.

“I don’t need you here right now.”

Jungwon sees the way you freeze. The way confusion flashes over your face. The way your hopeful and gentle eyes crack by a fraction.

Jungwon sees it all.

You purse your lip in hesitation, worried, but you follow his request with a nod nonetheless as you quietly slip out of the room. I’m always here for you if you need me.

Jungwon feels nothing but emptiness.

“Jungwon, you’ve missed two meals.”

He’s stuck in his music room. Again. Your lips pull into a forming frown at his state, placing the plate of food that you’ve organized for him at a table nearest to you.

He only gives you a glance before his attention is back at his music, “I’m kind of busy here,” he blandly reminds you the obvious, and you feel yourself mentally deflate, a bit.

A pause. You sucked in a breath. “I know, but you shouldn’t skip meals, okay? Take some rests,” you keep your voice gentle, hopeful.

He barely gives a grunt in reply.

Why didn’t you see that he didn’t want you anymore then?

You swallow, trying in another attempt, “Um, do you need any help in -” Jungwon swivels his chair abruptly, turning completely at you. It’s the first time you see him look at you in a while, “No,” the look in his eyes is something you’d never forget, “I’m fine, Y/N.” And when he turns his back on you, you feel a jab in the gut.

Ah.

You get the message.

You weren’t wanted around.

“Okay, I’ll uhh … I’ll …” you don’t finish your sentence, merely signaling that you were going to leave, but well aware that Jungwon was already back facing his screen. You don’t think he notices. You don’t think he ever notices anything at all.

No response. Not even a glance your way.

You felt so lonely.

Jungwon was going out again, as he’s all done for the past week.

Maybe you were overthinking all of this, but you felt as if he was doing whatever it took to avoid you. To avoid looking at you. To avoid talking to you. To avoid spending time with you. Of course, it was all in your head.

He would never hurt you like that, Jungwon was just busy. He was just going through things. He had it rough, you should be considerate.

It was just you alone most of the time, and you started to wonder if he was doing fine. If he needed you, at all.

“Jungwon?”

He turns to you, his body almost out of the door. “Are you okay?” you gently ask him.

He blinks. “I’m fine,” he replies after a pause.

You wanted to help him, whatever he was going through. You wanted to go through it with him together — you wanted to be there for him. “You don’t seem fine,” you try to start, “Jungwon, I’m here for you, you can talk to me if you—”

An exasperated sound of displeasure cuts you off, like a tether piecing everything together that snaps. “Can’t you do anything else other than bother me?” he waves you off, slamming the door in visible distress. He leaves you like that, and he doesn’t have to say anything else to make the wound hurt all the more.

The words left unsaid were enough.

He doesn’t come back the next day.

You wished he’d have told you how he loved you before he left, even if he didn’t mean it.

The air was cold. You know that it was not because of the weather.

Your mind wanders.

Sometimes you consider the fact that there could be someone else.

You wonder where everything started to change, and somedays, the thoughts get heavy and immensely difficult for you to carry. Sometimes they hurt too much to think about. You can’t help but wonder where your love lacked for him, in where you gave him everything. Even if it costed more than you could afford, it was worth it. But was it not for him? Was it not anymore?

It’s hard to fight what was fated.

But you would’ve still ruined yourself to fix him.

Even if there was another person, you think, you just wished he told you - so you would stop foolishly hoping and trying to convince yourself that this was all a sick phase of his that would eventually pass. So, you would stop foolishly assuming that there was ‘together’ and ‘forever’ for the both of you. You wouldn’t insist on it anymore, if that’s what made him happy. Watching him torture himself like that and choosing not to say anything to you was more painful than anything else.

You knew you were not the one in his heart.

This was all going to pass, right?

Jungwon, talk to me.

Jungwon can make it better.

He always has. You could never remember a time where he didn’t come to swoop in and save your day.

Was this the timing in where you realize that things were permanently going to change?

A simple month changes you a lot.

You believed, but you were slowly losing the light.

You gave so many signs.

So many warning signs.

He walked past every single one of them.

You couldn’t be the only one fighting for something that was already gone. Something that was thrown away and given up on. Because you have been, for as long as you can, and you don’t know if you can still continue to allow yourself to put yourself through it - because you don’t know if you can take it. Even if it was just one last time.

But still, you were willing to offer him anything he wanted the moment he needed it. You were ready to run to his side even if it killed you. Waste my time, waste it all.

The painful fake smiles, and pretending if everything was perfectly fine, as if you were okay, and the desperate pair of eyes that he always seemed to ignore.

You don’t know when it would stop.

You could only wish he would stay a bit longer to savor before he was going to make it hurt for you.

You felt the fatigue, then.

It’ll get better soon.

THE BREAKING POINT

It was all about him.

You don’t know if you could take this any longer.

“Jungwon?” you called out to him - through the empty house, “I’m tired.” Faintly.

You were washing the dishes after immediately arriving home from your part-time job. No time for giving yourself a rest, or for catching up on the upcoming exam the next day. It was eleven o’clock at night. You heard the door slam, and you knew Jungwon was home.

He could mope around and throw things around. He was entitled to treat you harshly because he was going through a rough time. He could do absolutely nothing. That was how everything worked.

But you couldn’t. You couldn’t cry. You couldn’t pause and rest. You weren’t entitled to feel angry or irritated because you weren’t going through whatever he was going through. You had to take care of him, and you had to endure getting treated that way our you could leave and walk through the door.

The shuffling of footsteps stops. You don’t move. You leave the faucet water running, eyes staring distantly - somewhere. But you don’t look over at him. You know that the courage that you’ve spent months trying to build up would come crashing down the moment you do.

There is no noise, only the running of the water. You know he’s listening.

“I can’t do it anymore,” you bat an eye, and your shoulders ease up a little. There is a certain stillness in the air.

“I feel like I’m just wasting my life in this relationship,” you’ve thought about this. You’ve tried to shrug the feeling off, but you wanted to know if you wanted to fight for him too. “I’m always looking stupid. I’m always left behind,” Isn’t it exhausting for you too, Jungwon?

Nothing. Silence. No response.

He wasn’t pushing you.

He wasn’t begging you to stay, like he always did.

He wasn’t going to even just try to change your mind.

He’s letting you go.

That infuriates you further, and you hate that he’s making you feel like you’re being too unreasonable without having to say anything. You hate the words he’s saying to you without even him having to open his mouth. Silence is all you’ve been receiving, hasn’t it? It’s always turning his back. It’s always the cold shoulder, whatever he had to say - he wouldn’t say it. It’s always been that way. Itwas always you that had to adjust.

You hated this.

You hated this so much.

It was him leaving you alone to your degrading thoughts that would break you more than he ever can, “It’s all about you. It’s all just about your sufferings, isn’t it? It’s all just yours!”

Why wasn’t he stopping you?

Why wasn’t he trying to fix this?

You wanted him to explain himself and assure you that everything was going to be okay. You wanted to work this out. Good God, you did. More than anything. But what happened to the day when you missed the most important exams for him just because he was too in his head to take care of himself? Where was he? What was he doing? Where was he when you were called to the school’s office because you were nearly falling off school? Where was he when you cried countlessly from overwhelming stress because of that?

Where was he when you were pacing back and forth at four in the morning without a wink of sleep, waiting for him to come back home and wondering to the heavens what the hell had happened to him? Where was he when you felt so isolated and alone? Where was he when your parents turned your back on you for you giving up everything for a boy who already seemed to have given up on you? Where was he to fight for you? Where was he to look you in the eye and give you a reason to keep fighting - to stay?

Jungwon was going through shit. That was something you understood. Something you wished he never went through, something you know he doesn’t deserve. And you were there for him. Every step of the way. But that didn’t mean that you had it all easy, either - did it? Didn’t he know? Or did he just not care?

You wanted to work this out. But … did he?

Soft, too soft. You could barely hear. “So desperate,” it was murmured. A pause, a shift in movement, and he was gone.

He was gone. He walked away. Like it meant nothing to him.

It stays, lingering. But he leaves.

You can’t believe him.

So monotone.

So emotionless.

Like it doesn’t mean anything.

He breaks you.

You crack open.

He doesn’t say anything else. He doesn’t fight for you. He doesn’t feel anything for you. He doesn’t find a reason to stay.

He finds a reason to leave.

That was it. And you weren’t even sure if he said it. Maybe it was a flicker of your imagination. Maybe you were going insane, was what it was. Did he leave?

He couldn’t have.

It was the end.

End.

The end of the both of you.

After that end, there was … nothing.

It was the end?

Your weight leans against the counter table in support, breathing heavily. Your heartbeat racing, your mind processing. A minute passes by, and you still stand frozen.

No. The stillness was too much to handle, you needed Jungwon, even if the only words he was ever going to say to you would hurt. You stumbled, rushing after the door as you tried calling after him. You didn’t want him to go. You couldn’t let him, you won’t give up on him. You needed him there. You were tired, and you needed Jungwon.

“Jungwon.” Where was he off to the moment you finally told him how you were feeling? Was it a mistake? Should you have stayed quiet instead?

“I didn’t mean what I said, come back and we’ll talk this out,” you called after him. You would take it all back.

He was gone.

You turned, and you turned, and you hoped. Nothing. Pitch black. Darkness.

“Jungwon?” you were crying now, crumbling a little. “Jungwon, I’m sorry, please come back, please.” you begged. And you kept calling him, until even the gods above could hear you. But where was he? No, he was going to come back for you. He was.

He was going to explain that he was sorry and that he never meant to hurt you. He was going to pop up right next to you like he always used it. He was going to smile at you with a cheeky grin and make fun of how you fell for his sick joke. He was going to give you a reason to stay and you were going to be okay.

“I didn’t mean it, I’m sorry,” you shouted after him, numbly trying to follow his footsteps that weren’t there. Footsteps that were erased. The footsteps of someone who promised he’d never leave your side. It was pathetic. Your desperation was pathetic.

Where did he go? Which way did he go? Please show up. Please. Please.

You shivered at the cold. Why was it raining so hard? You could barely see a thing. It was too dark. Not a single light in sight. You didn’t even realize it was raining. But it didn’t matter. You wouldn’t go home until Jungwon was back. And safe. Everything will be okay.

Moments pass and you don’t know if it took hours. Jungwon wasn’t there and you were losing him the way you were losing yourself. “Please,” your voice came out a whisper as your legs gave up on you, falling into your knees, “come back to me,” your body shakes, and that was the end.

All you were left with was the memories.

The both of you were nothing but memories now.

Ended because of happenstance.

He was still gone the next day.

And the next.

And the next after the next.

And the week after.

And the month after.

And after that.

You waited.

He promised.

You believed.

Ah.

You felt it, then.

The light you held onto exhaled and took its last breath.

Expired.

When things are expired - when things pass its due date, no matter how much big of a waste it is, or how much you were looking forward for it; you can only throw it away.

Because your relationship wasn’t the only thing gone and lost to disappear that day. It wasn’t only him - or it wasn’t the one thing you cared most about. It was you. You came along with it. You; a simple crumpled worn-out paper thrown away. A rough draft. Scrapped and forgotten.

He wasn’t coming back.

… ᵉⁿᵈ ᶠˡᵃˢʰᵇᵃᶜᵏ ↺

[ now playing ◃◃ ⅠⅠ ▹▹ skin by sabrina carpenter ]

PRESENT TIME, THE FOLLOWING DAY

The group was chatting with each other as usual. You were with Ningning and Seoyeon, catching up with the latest most random topics while you were making it a point to ignore Jungwon’s longing stare. Until Jake Sim takes a glance his way and points out of nowhere, “What happened to your arm?”

He immediately replies, “Nothing.”

When you sneak a glance over at Jungwon’s arm, he catches you and straight away tucks his arm away from your side’s view as casually as possible. Why did he have bandages? Your brows furrowed at him, skeptically surveying him.

What was he hiding this time?

It was in the middle of individual study period when Ningning queries out of nowhere, “Y/N, Is Jungwon trying to win you back?”

A few glances your way at the sudden uplifting noise through the quiet room.

You almost choke. You wish you did. “What?” Loudly whispering, you snap your head over her direction, eyes blazing down at her incredulously.

“He isn’t?” Seoyeon pipes in, questioning incredulously, all the more surprised than you. The both of them were never going to let her newfound discovery of exes that were quote “fated back together” end quote. You stare blankly at the both of them, unamused.

She shrugs innocently. “He looks like it,” she answers her own query and peeks over his way. Explaining, she heaves a casual exhale, “He keeps looking over at you every five seconds with those starry hopeful eyes as if you’d change your mind.”

Your face hardens at the mention of it. You hadn’t told what happened between you and Jungwon to anyone. Once both Seoyeon and Ningning had asked for the details of what happened, you simply brushed it off, not wanting to talk about it. They had assumed something went wrong.

Whatever Seoyeon had in mind to be out of a romantic film - this wasn’t the case. You had no idea what he was up to, but it was most probably something that would put up some entertainment to aid his boredom before he fleets away again.

She playfully nudged you with the edge of her elbow, “So, what made you dump him?”

She laughed. Loud. She was talking quite too casually that you speculated Jungwon could hear the conversation. His head was bowed, supposedly reading. You couldn’t read his facial features. You don’t want to.

“Poor dude, he looks like he’s had it rough.” Of course, everyone would assume it was Jungwon who was dumped. That it was him who was hurting. That it was him who got the mistreatment. You were the bad guy. In the end it’s your fault.

A chill runs down your spine. You dumped him? You almost laugh aloud in sarcasm, but it comes out as a snort. Waving her off teasingly, you motion the both of them to shoo away, “Shove off.”

Seoyeon gives a toothy beam before scribbling something down her notebook, Ningning peeks over to read it and giggles. You barely catch a glimpse of it.

‘Where there is anger, there is always pain underneath.’

LATER, AT THE LIBRARY

Another day. That meant another meeting with both Jungwon and Seoyeon in the library. After long hours, the group meeting was finished. All there was left to do was to submit the chapter’s draft for corrections to the professor; it had been decided already that Seoyeon and Jungwon were to do it.

You were leisurely taking your time packing up your stuff when Seoyeon hurriedly scurries out on her way to exit the library. “Hey, Jungwon, I’m really busy today, so I can’t accompany you to pass the papers. I just realized I have soccer practice,” she forms her lips into a pout, faking a thought. It occurs to you then that Seoyeon doesn’t have varsity.

Your eyes narrow at where this was going. “What about ask Y/N to do it? She has nothing to do anyway!” she winks, lightheartedly hitting Jungwon’s arm. He was taken aback, looking confused and somewhat lost himself, but having no choice left other than nodding, he agrees. “Uh . . . sure.”

Seoyeon turns your way and wiggles her eyebrows suggestively at you as soon as Jungwon had himself distracted with the papers in the meantime, giving you a thumbs up as if to say ‘you can do this!’ before slipping out of the room - faster before you could protest.

You scowled darkly, clenching down your jaw. If looks could kill. That girl.

On the other hand, Jungwon continues to arrange the pile of papers with a shuffle before quietly handing them to you, he then started on packing up his things. It was suffocating. Would leaving the room make it seem like you lost this nonexistent battle between the both of you?

He cuts you out of your trance of thoughts, “You were there that day at the tower, weren’t you?” he asks you out of the blue. He doesn’t even look your way as he stuffs a few books in his bag, and he doesn’t have to give context for you to know what he was referring to. not a look of uncertainty was evident in his eyes, “I know you were.”

Anger starts to boil inside. You have to remind yourself that this is what he wanted. “I don’t know what you’re talking about,” you casually dismissed.

He inwardly huffs out a breath. “Was it tough for you?” he changes the topic, and you swear it was only a matter of time before he gives you the biggest whiplash.

You were raging with endless anger and fury, yet you keep your face was void of any emotions – standing in front of him as his form blocked your path, stressing you even further. You gripped the strap of your backpack tightly, “Move out of my way, Jungwon.”

“Answer me, first.” he pleads with you. “Was it tough for you, then?”

He doesn’t budge and stubbornly remains rooted to his spot.

You grit your teeth, ripping apart your poorly concealed anger bit by bit. Jungwon didn’t care. He wanted you to feel emotion. Any emotion. Even if it was blinding rage. To scream at him and punch the living lights out of him. It was better than receiving your blank emotionless stare all the time. He couldn’t take it.

He was definitely testing your patience carelessly. Was it tough for you? You laughed humorlessly. A stab to his gut. A knife filled with poison. “I don’t know what you want, but let’s be mature people here. You do whatever hell you’ve been doing the last two years, and I’ll continue do the same. Okay?” you spoke, your tone hostile. You take the folder placed beside him before leaving him there, disinterested.

It wasn’t as simple for you as it has been for him to simply walk the relationship off down the drain.

Not when he promised the world.

Not when you believed him.

Not when he was standing there right in front of you acting as if he didn’t know anything about the shit you had to go through without him. As if he was just innocent. As if he had nothing to do with it. As if he cared. And especially not when he was the one who put you there and left in the first place.

This is what had become of the both of you. Jungwon and you. Worse than strangers, haunted by what’s left of something that was long gone.

All he had to do then was apologize. Actually, he just had to come back, and you would do the apologizing for him. You were always the one who gave in, in the end, anyway.

You would’ve accepted him.

You would’ve even begged for him.

The things you would have done.

None of this would’ve happened.

But.

None of that would work now.

None of that mattered.

It was all too late.

The both of you were just so different now.

LATER

Riki was confusing, truly.

“Didn’t you make fun of me two years ago about how much of a dumbass I was?” you rolled your eyes incredulously at Riki picking at you to how rude you were being to Jungwon, “You hated him, what’s with the change of attitude?” you snort.

Riki shifts his weight, fixing the strap of his bag, “You were a dumbass,” he agrees, pulling a face at you, “and I still hate that guy,” he continues, his expression turning sour at the thought of him, but pauses.

“But you were happy,” he looks over at you deliberately.

A happy dumbass. You could cringe, that was the old you. The desperate old you. Long gone.

You were most definitely not having it, your facial expression hard. “Did you have a head trauma or something? A fever? Are you forgetting the past two years?” you press the back of your hand to his forehead, checking his temperature and warmth for dramatic effect.

He pushes your hand away, “I’m just saying,” he starts, talking to you as if you were a child, “he left, but he’s back, isn’t he?” he throws his hands around for emphasis.

Then he shrugs, like he doesn’t know any better either, “He’s gotta be back for a reason.”

You don’t care. You don’t care what reason he’s back, or whatever he wants from you. “He can’t just come and go as he pleases, idiot,” you forcefully shrug it off, grumbling. “that jerk made his decision that day. He made his bed and now he has to lie in it.”

And Riki gives up on how stubborn you are, “You really do hold grudges, don’t you?” he ruffles your hair up, amused.

Strangling a sound, you kick the back of his leg, but he dodges.

Oops, your eyes slightly widen, anticipating a fall. You lose your balance, nearly tripping - but luckily, Riki notices within a half of a second and catches you before your face plants flat on the ground, hoisting you back to his chest by the grip on your waist.

You were going to laugh at your mistake, your face already breaking into a smile - but your eyes catch someone a few feet away.

You blink. Your smile slowly starts to drop at the sight of him.

Of course, it had to be Yang Jungwon.

For a split second, your shock doesn’t allow your eyes to leave his.

Riki snaps you out of it, releasing you from his grasp and guides you to his side as he slings his arm around your shoulder - like he always does. You’re sure Riki knew well enough and had an idea of how Jungwon looked like. He recognized him straight from the café, and you never questioned how he knew. How were you going to walk out of this one?

Riki doesn’t look at you in confirmation - you have no idea what shit he’s going to pull, but you’re sure as hell it isn’t going to be good.

He nods once in acknowledgement over at Jungwon, but Jungwon pays no mind and choses to ignore him as his eyes flicker onto the arm around you.

Riki notices it.

You don’t know what to do.

“Hey, I’m Riki,” he starts - and for some crazy reason, he sounds as if he was gloating, “who are you?” he throws back casually. Too casually. You would be irritated to talk to him, if you were in his place. The dislike in Jungwon’s features is evident enough. You don’t know what Riki was playing, but he extends his hand out for Jungwon to bro-shake, whatever that could even signify.

A long pause. Jungwon barely glances at it before his attention is back on you, ignoring him beside you as a whole.

“Why are you with him?” he tries to casually question you - as if he was trying to create small talk - his voice is calm - but Jungwon’s eyes never lie. He could never hide anything from it. You knew that look, and you didn’t like it. It made your blood boil. The guts of this self-centered arrogant asshole.

Riki answers in your stead, knowing that you wouldn’t be able to answer. He laughs, throwing his head back a bit, “Oh, don’t mind us,” he curtly replies, “my girl over here ‘s just really clumsy.”

You forgot how much of on asshole Nishimura Riki really is.

Riki effortlessly sighs, openheartedly shrugging as if to say ‘what-can-you-do?’. It was friendly, but you understood the underlying meaning. He was testing him. Picking at him. Provoking him. You wanted to facepalm. Provoking was the only thing he was ever good at, why did you even bother? What was this, some fighting-for-the-alpha-spot werewolf shit?

Nishimura Riki, you asshole!

Jungwon understands the message. A muscle up on his clenched cheek twitches, his eyes slightly narrow. Was he threatened already? You were in a state of disbelief, Riki was barely even doing anything. Seriously. He never changes.

“Why are you with him?” he asks you again, this time his voice comes out somewhat strained in the end. The old Jungwon would’ve probably started a fight right then and there, lacking any sort of composure. Jungwon changed, hasn’t he?

But you have, too.

Riki peeks at you, “Babe? Do you know him?” Confused. Curious. Innocent.

You had to give it to him. Riki was an amazing actor, he could’ve fooled you if you didn’t know any better yourself.

You merely glance at Jungwon, barely a pause before you answer, “No.”

No hesitation in your tone. A ‘no’ as if he was simply a stranger standing before you. Nothing. You observe how your answer hits Jungwon. How the simple word destructs him. You could only watch. Everything was different now. This is what you wanted, wasn’t it?

But where was the sense of satisfaction?

You tug at Riki’s arm, “Let’s go, you promised me to bring me home today.”

You leave Jungwon like that. You leave him with the uncomfortable feeling that was bubbling up. Riki is surprised. And confused. You don’t know if he’s still continuing the act when he affectionately waves Jungwon goodbye before immediately following after you.

Yang Jungwon strikes again.

You whacked Riki at the back of his head the moment you were as far from the gods-be-damned-scene and as far from Jungwon as possible, “Idiot!” you hissed, “What the hell was that?”

He rubs the back of his neck soothingly, glaring at you. “You know, just a little ‘thank you’ would suffice.”

“’Thank you’, my ass! I told you to not pull any stupid shit!” You threaten to hit him again, vexed at the stunt he pulled. The situation was only going to get worse from there and you couldn’t take back anything at this point. You retreated your arm, groaning in horror of what’s to come.

“The moment called for it!” was his only excuse.

You scowled at him, as if your eyes could annihilate him at the spot.

You got Jungwon, you had to admit. A few more of these blows and he would leave your sights. This was a bad idea, but your mind didn’t seem to pay any care.

Hurt him.

Right then and there, your ego allows Riki to participate in whatever crazy-sick game this was. You just needed Jungwon far away.

Riki smirks at you and flashes you a winning smile. He knows you’ve agreed to his idea without having to say anything else. You had no other option, either way.

“You won’t regret this, ___. It’ll be fun!” he singsongs, draping his arm around you.

It’ll be fun, you echoed.

You’ve been lying to yourself for two years, what’s a couple days more to you?

THE NEXT DAY

Jungwon finds you asleep, leaning your head on the desk with your cheek pressed up against the table.

And Nishimura Riki was by your side, reading gleefully. Mostly watching you sleep. A fucking weirdo, Jungwon inwardly comments. His stomach turns at the sight. His mood has already dried.

He stands there for what seems like a torture of infinity before Riki sees him there. He just grins at him. Jungwon would want to do nothing more but throttle him and that shit-eating look off his face.

“Here for the thesis paper?” was all he asks, he starts collecting himself and his things, preparing to leave, thankfully, Jungwon praises.

But when Riki decides to act like the biggest fucker to piss him off all the more when he leans in to gently tuck back the hair covering your face as as you sleep, Jungwon defensively takes a step forward to you by instinct, ready with a handful of swear words.

Riki notices it, and only press his index finger on his lips, indicating to keep his voice down. Jungwon’s jaw slightly ticks as he stays in place - not risking your sleep.

He pats Jungwon’s shoulder on his way out, but he stops by the door. He motions him closer, as if he were to tell him something hugely important. Jungwon presses his lips into a thin line, walking up to him and trying to keep it as civil as possible.

He holds up a finger, as if to gesture ‘and-one-more-thing’, “Oh, and tell her to keep the hoodie she’s wearing, will you?”

Jungwon raises both brows in question, and instantly regrets it.

Riki further explains himself, "She likes stealing them from me. God knows she has a whole rack of them on her closet.” He shrugs, a growing smirk on his face. “But eh, I like it on her, it suits her better.”

That little shit.

He was about to give him a phony nod and thumbs up to let the whole agitating conversation over with when Riki presses his luck even further, “She’s pretty.”

God. Jungwon’s patience was running thin, his jaw flexes.

“Oh, and tell her -”

Jungwon nearly slams the door on his face.

He wondered what you saw in that guy.

Walking back with his hands stuffed in his pockets - something he does when he was definitely pissed off, he yanks a chair, face displaying irritation at its finest when he arrives back at your table. He doesn’t bother to spare you a glance your way, he knows you too well.

“I know you’re awake,” he says out of nowhere, his voice tight. “Stop pretending.”

It takes several moments before you start faking a yawn. You could easily fool anyone, but sadly for you, he knows you too well. His glance is blank as you outstretch your arms as if you had just woke up, you greet him as if you hadn’t expected to see him there, “Oh . . hey.”

Jungwon had already looked sour from his encounter with Riki, his pissed off gaze averts away from yours. A muscle from his jaw ticks as he huffs, “Your boyfriend left.”

You nod, blinking as if you were slowly trying to register everything. Jungwon wanted to ask you a flood of questions: what was he doing here? Were you already awake when he was being a creep and staring at you while you were ‘asleep’? Why are you wearing his hoodie -? “Okay.”

That aggravates him even more, and his tone turns curt and strained. “I’m going to work on the thesis. You do whatever.” he dismisses you, heaving a short breath.

He stalks off, but not before grimacing at your outfit up and down - more than fumingly horrified, spitting out through gritted teeth, “And take off that hoodie. It looks horrible on you.”

THE WEEK AFTER

You wake up in Monday morning with aching pins and needles, not being able to move an inch of your body. Your eyelids were too heavy to keep open, weighing tons of your effort.

Of all days, you were sick.

Lord.

Releasing a cough, your hand reaches for your ringing phone. Riki, the contact label name displayed. You try to clear your throat as you answer the call, in effort to not sound as sick as possible. “Hello?” your groggy and hoarse voice could be depicted from miles away by a total stranger. Much less Nishimura Riki.

“Princess?” His voice answers through the call, perceptibly worried, “what’s wrong? You sound . . . off today.” You could tell he was squinting as he said this.

“Uh. . .” you sniffed, trying to come up of a lie, “just watched a sad film. Cried a lot.”

Riki hums, giving no humor in his voice. “Mhm. And that’s why you’re late four hours to class?”

Your stomach lurches. You were what? You had classes today, and you didn’t even remember. Were you missing on anything important in university today? Shit.

Racing for the most reasonable excuse, “I wanted to . . . enjoy a day off?” Bad liar. You were nothing but a bad liar. You were too exhausted to create a better and more creative lie.

Riki, being way too observant on things he shouldn’t be, clearly wasn’t buying it. He clicks his tongue. “I’m coming over. Don’t go anywhere. Stay in bed,” he orders you shortly before ending the call. He doesn’t scold you or lecture you, and he leaves it at that.

You moan at the surge of pain once again located in your stomach, you had no plans of leaving the bed even if you wanted to anyway, given your current state.

Riki texts you that he was outside around less than ten minutes later.

If you could complain, you’d rather have Riki come in your room to help you up. Like he always did. You found him not doing so rather odd, as he would always make the weirdest reasons to come drop by your house. Moving the slightest inch was hard as it already was.

It takes you what seems like hours for you to get out of bed, and even more for you to bag your bag and head outside. You were ready to grumble about how efficient and less painful this would’ve been if Riki had come to help you until more than one figure greets you outside your yard.

Riki and . . . hands stuffed to his pockets, head bowed - you know that side profile -Yang Jungwon?

Both stayed at opposite ends, standing in front of their cars, awaiting for you with the hardest glares sent the other’s way. What was happening? Jungwon was most likely the reason Riki wasn’t able to go inside your house to pick you up. That was the only factor that made sense - the rest was something you couldn’t connect the dots of.

Both their cars parked out of your house, and you could feel the tension slicing you in half the moment you step foot outside. These two could never stay in the same room, sticking around to wait for you was strictly meant for you.

Jungwon is the first to break the glaring match as soon as he sees you, being the first to approach you while gently holding you up.

“Love, are you okay? Let me bring you to the hospital - come on,” he pleads with you, gesturing towards his car.

“This isn’t the time to joke about something like this in her state,” Riki forces a fake smile through his gritted teeth, irritated as he sneaks his arm around your waist, holding you up himself all the better with a single hand, “just so you know.”

Jungwon’s gaze darkens, “It isn’t about fighting for who gets her, just so you know,” he mimics, “I don’t trust her with you, you dipshit.”

Riki scoffs to himself, shifting his weight as he continues to press you tightly against him, not budging an inch of you to Jungwon, “And look who came to talk.”

Jungwon opens his mouth, his eyes ruthlessly set on Riki’s before you try and weakly cut in from your lack of energy. However, your weak knees give up on you and you almost stumble down, not before both Jungwon and Riki reaches out their hand to grab your arm within half a second. Riki half-yells your name, all the more uneasy and concerned than you were.

“Y/N? Love? Are you okay?” Jungwon’s hostile tone towards Riki not seconds ago immediately dissipates, conveying his tone of worry and panic at your weak state.

“I’ll drive you to the hospital,” Jungwon additionally suggests, trying to have you lean his weight on him for you to stand property, and in that way he could easily carry you back to his car.

“Hell no,” Riki growls, in the other hand.

You notice Jungwon’s eyes darken at the corner of your eye, “And who exactly are you to her to begin with-?”

“Her boyfriend, nice to meet you, you dipshit,” Riki retorts.

Jungwon lets out a low noise, pissed off at a topic that was seemingly sensitive to him. “Over my dead body would you ever be her boyfriend.”

He rolls his eyes in disinterest. “Still going through the stages of grief? Is this the denial stage?” he taunts, clicking his tongue with a tsk.

“Bo,” Jungwon calls you - candidly ignoring Riki’s shitty statements, but his sharp eyes never leave Riki’s, “let’s get this over with and tell us who would you want to -”

This was getting too prolonged, you were so close to vomiting again. You definitely did not want to vomit here of all places. “Riki,” you called out faintly, interrupting Jungwon, “please take me to the hospital.”

All parts of your body ached painfully, and you were too miserably ill to deal with this situation. You imagine Jungwon’s expression crumbling, deflating.

Riki straightens, visibly surprised, but he doesn’t hesitate. Not before giving Jungwon a final look, he carries you with you gently, making sure you were watching your step as the both of you left the defeated Jungwon without another word.

You were too weak to look back at Jungwon – he helplessly stares after the sight of his girl - his girl - being taken away from him when she needed help the most.

Again.

You spend three days in the hospital for a diagnosed viral infection.

Thankfully but not surprisingly, Riki stayed by your side through every minute, only leaving for a shower, buying take-out, and for getting you new packs of clothes. It was Ningning and Seoyeon who came over to take care of you during Riki’s leave.

He sticked around from the moment you were submitted, to the insertion of the IV, through your countless trips to the bathroom to puke and for him to hold your hair back, and through your dischargement.

The both of you were on your way to the car to load your things. Riki had all of his hands filled. “Oh yeah, I almost forgot, thanks for the wanton noodles,” you mention immediately as soon as you remembered, “How d’you know they were my favorite?” You don’t recall ever brining it up to Riki.

Instead of bursting up his signature winning smirk, Riki furrows his brows at you, “Wanton noodles? What wanton noodles?”

You perked up a brow, “The one you left by the door earlier when you were paying the discharge bills?”

Riki had nothing. He blinks at you as if you had been hallucinating. “Why would I leave food by the door?” he shakes his head, “Doll, what in the hell are you talking about?”

“The wanton noodles that you –“ You stop mid-sentence, freezing. Realization dawns on you then. The note, you recall as you piece things back together.

Stop skipping meals. I got you your favorite. I’m sorry I wasn’t there when you needed me.

Yang Jungwon.

There was no name from who it was from, you had simply assumed it was from Riki. This wasn’t your first time realizing that Jungwon had never dropped by, you had simply figured he didn’t care. Your stomach sinks, ‘I’m sorry I wasn’t there when you needed me’. The double implications.

Riki waves his hand in front of your face, “Earth to princess? Hello?”

Ah. Right. You blink, shaking your head – you meet his eyes with a smile, “Nothing. I just thought I remembered something.”

WEEKS LATER

Jungwon was a lot quieter than usual ever since you’d been discharged.

Since . . . the night he and Riki were there. You slightly wince at the memory.

You almost managed to successfully spend a thesis discussion with him without having to say much - to your great pleasure - until he just had to ruin it for you. He was filling in his part for the thesis paper while you were scanning through the pages of the book you were reading, skipping to the ending.

“Hey,” he starts, humor laced in his voice. “D’you still read the endings of books like you used to? I remember –“

Your head snaps up. You don’t smile. You don’t flush red in embarrassment. You don’t laugh like the way he’d expected you to. The way you always did. You stared harshly down to his eyes. It wasn’t the heart-fluttering kind - nor was it the passionate or the fierce or the loving kind of stare. No, it was a heart-piercing glare - so full of pure hatred, the kind that had his breath hitching up his throat in the worst way possible and his heart sinking into your stomach.

“Don’t.”

Ah.

No double meanings. Nothing else. The essence couldn’t be taken as a mere mistakable, conveyed with just one simple word that held the heaviest weight, yet it was enough for him to understand. He doesn't try to catch himself or his smile as it fades - along with the antagonizing agony that accompanied it.

The light in your eyes has gone.

They were so dark.

It doesn’t shine the way it used to.

He opens his mouth to say something, but nothing comes out. He struggles. It takes him two more tries. Two more times of you opening and closing his mouth for him to finally unknot his tongue and drag the words to the surface.

“You have a …” he hesitates to say it, “boyfriend?”

It was so close. A few seconds until you would leave, and he just could wait. Stuffing your university belongings back into your bag, you exhaled, your lips tightening into a hard line. “What is it to you?”

A second or two passes, “Oh,” he replies, “I didn’t know, so -”

“What difference does it make?” you rhetorically question him, your patience running thin, “if you didn’t know or if you did?” You were being absurd - you knew that, but you wanted anything but the idea of having to talk about that subject with him and act like it was fine.

Being snappy at him wasn’t the greatest idea, but you know Jungwon was trying to get at somewhere. You would do whatever it took to defy him. That quiets him down, only forcing a painful nod.

You needed to leave. You couldn’t stay away from him, especially whenever he was near. God knows only a few words from Jungwon would be all it would take for him to manipulate you back into his strings.

Painful silence.

Until, “Does he make you happy?”

You find yourself freezing.

A sick feeling in your stomach.

Does he make you happy?

Happy.

Why was he asking the question like he meant it?

Your eyes flicker his way, and there is no hint of humor or taunting mock in his face. Was he serious? The man who broke you to pieces and disregarded you stood before you and asked if another man was making you happy, as if he cared. As if he ever did.

You don’t say anything.

You don’t have anything to say.

Jungwon knows that.

You try to breathe.

One.

Two.

Three.

You walk away, and he lets you. You walk away because walking away was the only thing you’ve ever done. Because walking away was the only thing you could ever do around him. Because you can’t risk another goodbye from him.

You were done gnawing back at the past.

[ now playing ◃◃ ⅠⅠ ▹▹ spring day by bts ]

↻ … ᶠˡᵃˢʰᵇᵃᶜᵏ

AFTER THE BREAK-UP

And the both of you became back to being nothing.

Just like that.

You told him your secrets, and you let him in. All the good, all the bad. You trusted him and brought down your defenses. You let him know your weird thoughts or funny inside jokes and the deep insecurities.

But he never got to know the little things, you realize the moment it’s over. The little things that infuriated you. The little things that made you laugh. Or the little things that would always put you on a better mood - the little bits and pieces of you.

You barely got to know him at all.

Was that the reason?

Was the fact of loving him just as plainly as that - nothing more, and nothing less - the root of it all?

Or was it just the big things that held the both of you together, and the small things that caused you to fall apart?

You don’t believe it’s over.

Because it’s not.

You’ve been stuck inside the house for longer than you could count. You’ve memorized the number of tiles on the floor and seen every miniscule crack on the wall. You know how many steps it takes to walk from here to the door.

And you know just how many steps Jungwon took to leave.

Your eyes remained fixated on the door, waiting at the dining table for him to come home.

Like every other day.

He was still finding his way back home, you reminded yourself.

Busy. He’s busy.

Tick-tock.

He’s on his way.

He'll come back. He always does. He promised.

You form hundreds of thousands of excuses for him.

But the door doesn’t swing open to reveal Jungwon in all form and glory beaming down at you, apologizing, telling you that it was a mistake, telling you that he didn’t mean it. Every day is the same.

But nothing.

Nothing.

Riki knows it’s one of your days.

He reaches for your hand to grab and the fact that you have no response alone proves his assumption even further.

He doesn’t mind, Riki decides to walk you home.

You have those days where you go completely silent. Worse than ever. So quiet that he could never guess what you’re thinking or if you’d ever come back from it. Eyes empty as if there was no one home. He doesn’t know how he could help you specifically, how he could make you snap out of it.

The only thing he can do is talk. Talk and talk and talk and talk. He talks for hours about anything on the top of his head, and Riki himself is surprised he could somehow manage to not run out of topics to tell you about.

Even if you don’t respond. Not even a flicker of recognition to any of his comments or jokes.

Riki never knows what you’re thinking.

But this time, that day, he knows it’s about Jungwon.

Someone asked you about Jungwon today. How he was doing, where he is, and what happened to him. As hard as Riki would shield you away from situations such as these, it wasn’t hard enough.

Riki was so close to making you smile the other day. He was finally doing it.

And then he’s back again to square one.

After his efforts of trying to get your attention by the food stalls the both of you passed by, Riki starts to go quiet.

There is no noise - nothing between the two of yoou. Only the rustling of leaves. The cool breeze of air. The sound of footsteps on cobblestone. Cars driving by. Indistinct chatters.

“Why are you still holding on?” quietly. So quietly, but you easily catch on Riki’s question. Then your hands slightly tremble.

You don’t answer him, you’re afraid of saying too much. You’re afraid.

He never said goodbye.

That was your reason.

He never said goodbye.

Jungwon always bids you goodbye, you’d explain to Riki if you could.

What makes this time any different, right?

He won’t leave without saying goodbye. He wouldn’t. Only you could understand.

He never said goodbye.

A part of you still believed that meant he was coming back.

When Riki tries dropping by like any other day - a sneaky reason to check on you, from the start of early morning, he sees you there.

You spend the whole day stuck in the kitchen.

Riki knows what day it was without having to ask.

By the evening, you bring out the cake that you’ve been preparing for and set it down the table, in front of an empty chair. The chair you never let anyone sit on. It’s still belonged to someone else.

Riki knows who it’s for.

Your eyes are distant, as if they were caught up in a dream. Light. You were there - physically, but you were far away. Far, far away. Riki started to wonder if this was just how you were. He wondered if there was ever a time where you were really alive.

He wondered the extent to how much this guy did to break you.

Your eyes looked so empty.

But you were still holding on, weren’t you? You’ve never responded to him, but he knew. Riki made no noise, but he clenches his hands into fists. You don’t acknowledge him standing there.

You set the candles down the cake with the lighter.

You only stare at the cake, expectantly. Waiting. Waiting for someone to blow the candles off. Waiting to sing the cheerful ‘happy birthday’ song and make a wish. But it wasn’t just anyone.

He doesn’t attempt to do anything - or say anything. But he stands near close to your proximity. Watching over. Silently. He doesn’t leave you that day.

You take a seat next to the empty chair, simply and patiently letting time pass as your eyes affixed themselves with the dancing fire.

Until the candles blow out themselves hours later from the cold air.

That night, Riki also knew who it was for when he heard your uncontrolled crying and broken whimpers pass from your room for the first time.

There was a period wherein you stopped leaving the house entirely. And Riki stopped pushing you to.

Everything reminds you of him.

The house has never felt so big.

Alone.

You miss the way he smells.

The overbearing feelings starts to compress, and you feel it expanding within your chest. It gets hard to breathe. You feel helpless.

Jungwon won’t like it if he sees you like this, wouldn’t he?

You keep reminding yourself.

He might come in any second, and you wanted to be at your best.

You promised yourself you wouldn’t cry.

You won’t cry.

You’d make it up to him.

You don’t want it to end.

He’ll come back.

You don’t know how many months it has been.

That’s a lie. You do.

You find one of the notes he wrote for you in an old shoe box.

It reminds you that what you had was real, that what you had wasn’t just a figment of your imagination. It wasn’t a dream.

You picked up the first letter, your fingers tracing through his handwriting.

It was painful. A shard of glass piercing through your skin.

To my one and only girl,

You couldn’t breathe.

It was merely the first line of the long letter, and you couldn’t breathe.

This time, you don’t pretend to forget that you aren’t Jungwon’s anymore. You don’t pretend that this was all a phase. A nightmare. A joke.

This time, you don’t pretend to wait at the living room for him to come back home, swinging the door open with a grin and greeting you from a long day like he used to. Not anymore. Even if you had so much to tell him. So much news to show off to him. So much news to be happy for. To celebrate. But you weren’t.

This time, you almost suffocate.

You torture yourself even more this time. You open the letter again and it rips your heart out. It stabs you and leaves you bleeding. You read the last line. Sealed with a promise. A broken promise that meant nothing now.

I’ll make you the happiest girl, I promise. I love you :)

You could imagine his cheeky smile as he wrote this, sealing the promise - among with every other one that he’s made. Every single one that he didn’t claim responsibility for.

Liar.

He was a liar.

He was reckless and a liar.

He broke you to the point where you couldn’t even manage to bring yourself to say his name.

You wish you were brave enough.

What a fool you were.

A dumb, useless fool.

“Kant’s metaphysics?” Riki answers, lying on the edge of your bed. He lounges carelessly with a review paper clutched on his left hand.

You rest a hand on your hip, pacing around your room. “No, but you’re somewhat close. It’s categorical imperative.” You corrected, recalling your philosophy lesson by memory through mentally singing a tune to yourself.

The philosophy oral examination was this coming Thursday that next week. It was Saturday. Riki complained, saying he needed help and tutoring, and you, other than staying cooped up at home debating your life choices and burying yourself in academics, there wasn’t really anything else you did.

He squints his eyes in confusion, “But how does that relate to the second follow up question after that?” you pause, staring hard at the desk beside you to remember the answer, you take minutes - but nothing.

You run a hand through your hair, visibly frustrated and stressed. You had all the more topics to go through. Hell, you had to go through the whole book and you couldn’t get past the second lesson yet.

Releasing an exhale, you shut your eyes tightly. Shit. Shit.

Jungwon always knew what to do. He knew how to calm you down and rile you up and make you laugh right after like he was born with it. He’d drop everything at the sight of you overthinking and over-stressing school work, embracing you and telling you that you didn’t have to worry. That he was there. He’d let you cry it out, vent out your frustration and stay by your side through it all, running a hand through your hair soothingly to comfort you.

He knew exactly how to take care of you.

You need him.

You needed him.

Just for this moment.

How much longer?

Biting down your lower lip forcefully, you chant the words over and over again.

He’s not coming back.

You know he’s not coming back.

You know.

You’re back to pacing across your room, back and fourth. ‘”I don’t know, I really -” you cut yourself off, irritated. At this point, you’re ready to erupt from the heavy weight of his absence. At this point, you want to drop to the floor and stop time to give yourself a breath.

Riki has sat up at this point, silently watching you. He’s probably either thinking that you were worrying and stressing over the amount of workload given to you like the usual. Or, does he know that academics isn’t what you were worrying about at all at that moment?

You try to level your breathing.

Come back.

Jungwon, please.

Come back to me.

To: won 😚🙄

[03:46am] you: hi i’m graduating this wednesday. i’d really like it if you could drop by.

error. message undelivered. try again?

[03:50am] you: hey did you know my graduation is nearing?? haha you should come :)

error. message undelivered. try again?

[05:18am] you: jungwon

[05:18am] you: are you there?

[05:19am] you: you’re gone and i really need you.

message sent.

do you want to delete this message?

message successfully deleted.

Contact user: [ENTER]

Contact: yang jungwon

by pressing [Confirm] you are allowing the name changes to be saved.

changes saved.

“The sun’s so clear out. Lighten up, princess ~” a voice calls you out of your thoughts and you realize you were trapped in a dream.

Identifying reality with dreams seemed entirely difficult to you. There was something fiction in the way reality was going to you.

Reality was as crazy as dreams were.

“Your moping is bad for my skin,” Riki comments lightheartedly, scrunching up his nose.

It’s been a week or so since he came along. Since he bumped into you and started to grow interest towards you. You don’t ask him, and you don’t really care. Nothing that every happens around you matters to you as much anymore.

You only blink in regard to him. That was more than a sign of acknowledging his presence that he was used to.

Riki is used to this. He doesn’t mid this type of behavior, nor did he expect anything else. He self-proclaimed himself as your guardian angel – two days after he’d met you – who’d look after you “since you lack the ability to look after yourself” end quote. Which was true. You couldn’t look after yourself. Especially due to the past circumstances that he pieced together himself.

You were probably someone’s ex-girlfriend.

To him, Y/N was a detached-from-reality schoolmate of his who was definitely more than what meets the eye.

You were someone he wanted to get to know, until you stopped becoming that person, one day.

Until you became someone he wanted to protect.

Sliding himself into the seat next to yours, he pouts at you. “Y’know . . . I think it’s time for you to . . move on,” he struggles finding the right word for it. You know it takes a lot in him to try and be gentle, as he probably would’ve been teasing you with a bunch of insults.

Your throat encloses, and you feel like burning up.

Moving on meant accepting that he was gone. Gone from your life. Accepting a future without him, and that wasn’t something you were ever going to be ready to do.

He was long gone.

Jungwon was long gone.

The magic you once felt with him wasn’t there anymore.

He wasn’t there anymore.

And neither were you.

Waiting for someone is painful.

Letting go from someone is painful, too.

But not knowing whether to wait for someone or let him go?

It hurts more than anything.

You were out inside the bathroom for the first time in hours since you’ve left your seat from blankly staring at your phone.

It was all pure coincidence when Nishimura Rik stumbles upon the open phone screen that you’ve been torturing yourself endlessly with.

It was all pure coincidence.

And coincidence just happened to align with his curiosity.

you: S.O.S. [7 hours ago]

you: come back [7 hours ago]

[Read]

Riki doesn’t have to read the contact name to see who it was.

It must be Riki’s professional job; being the only one around able to spot where you are when you suddenly disappear from the face of the earth.

“Princess?” Riki finally finds you along the benches, alone. He figures it weird, he’s not exactly sure what you were doing there exactly.

Until he sees your face. Your tear-stained cheeks.

Ah.

“It hurts.” Out of nowhere. He has never prepared himself for this. Your voice cracks a bit, “Riki, it hurts.” You plead with him as if he power to take it all away. Small. Helpless. That was what you sounded like.

He offers his open arms to you, and you bury yourself in them. He lifts you up from the darkness, even if it was just by a centimeter.

“I’m in so much pain, can you stop it?” you tell him in a managed whisper, your voice hoarse.

He’s afraid anything he’d say would only break you even further. He only hugs you tighter.

Fuck, why did he give too many shits about you? This wasn’t the least like him at all. What in the world have you managed to do to Nishimura Riki? He stares at you, not being able to do anything.

“Why does it hurt so much?” a small vulnerable child whimpering in pain – pain they were forced to believe was their fault. That was how you sounded.

He doesn’t know what to say. He’s frozen, in fact. “Riki I want to –“ you pause, trying to start again, “I’m tired,” you struggle with your words, your eyes closed shut, “Please make it stop.”

His eyes flicker.

Please make it stop.

Riki isn’t much of a person who really cared about anyone else’s business. He never poked his nose around because he never bothered enough to. Everyone was black and white to him.

You were a quite peculiar one to him, though. It drove him crazy, what was so good about you? You were clearly dead hungover your past ex. Barely talked. Barely did anything, at all.

But he saw the most beautiful and vibrant colors when he looked at you in the whole life that he’s been walking around colorblind to any other.

He was just being pulled down deeper.

For the first time, all Riki wanted from someone was just their happiness. Purely. Passionately. Their happiness for his happiness. He just wanted you . . .

He just wanted you.

Nishimura Riki is done for.

If this was what he thinks it is, he’s done for. Because Riki was ready to be anyone you wanted him to be.

You gave be something I’ve never had, he wants to tell you. And I have nothing special to give you - but I will give you everything I have.

He doesn’t break promises. Especially if it’s you.

Riki will mend what was broken.

Whatever it takes.

One step at a time.

He was getting himself into the biggest mistake in his life, God, he sure as hell knew that. But Riki was never going to regret what was to come.

He was going to make it stop. All of it.

… ᵉⁿᵈ ᶠˡᵃˢʰᵇᵃᶜᵏ ↺

PART TWO

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attemptinghaikyuu · 3 months

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~Choose your own Ending~

It’s not concerning at first. Suna is usually chill, so it’s a breath of fresh air when after his night of having none at all, he is only relaxed and sorry. If Osamu’s being honest, he’s more than ready to forget his attitude. The relief he feels at his friends changed attitude, really is enough for him.

He also bought him a shit ton of his favorite snacks, so that helped him feel some forgiveness too.

Even if they were thrown at his face.

As the week goes on, Osamu realizes some things aren’t quite adding up. Suna is constantly watching him and his partner. He writes it off at first. His relationship is new and with one of Suna’s closest friends, and the two of you hadn’t exactly got along til recently. But still.. Suna staring is making him squirm.

He decides near the end of the week, that he needs to see Suna squirming with him.

Osamu isn’t a twin for nothing, he knows how to be annoying and oh yeah, he knows how to rile people up. It’s what he tries to do to Suna. He enlists outside help from you.

All the work is to no avail.

“Why are you frowning?” Your voice pulls him out of his frustrated kitchen counter cleaning.

“Suna’s hiding something,” he huffs. “I know he does, that damn fox.”

You laugh, wiping a fake tear from your eye.

“Come on, you’re being mean,” your sighing turns into a chuckle as Osamu’s wiping turns aggressive. “we already picked and picked at him, pretty sure he would’ve caved and told us by now if he was hiding something.”

Osamu slows down when you bump his hip with yours. “Seriously, let’s watch a movie and chill like Suna would.”

Osamu grins at that. He had never seen Suna more relaxed than he had this week. There had been the slightest fear his friend was on drugs, though he had quickly come to the conclusion he wouldn’t be able to hide that.

He sighs, letting his answer out slowly as a grin he couldn’t suppress took over. “I guess we can do that.”

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rose-pearls · 2 years

Text

Relationships and family time

Summary: you have been dating Fred but need to tell your families at the annual barbecue you have. Between spending time with your parents and your twin Harry you manage to tell them you are together. (Everyone is alive and happy, no Voldemort! Hufflepuff reader)

It was finally summer, no more classes or homework for the next two months. I could already see the long mornings in bed and the short nights of fun. Everyone was getting ready to leave the castle and my friend Susan was telling me what she was planning to do this summer.

“And then we are going to the beach for a bit of sun!”, I smiled at her dreamy smile, she looked like she was ready to leave right now.

“That sounds like a lot of fun, you will have to keep me updated about-“, but before I could finish my sentence I felt a pair of arms around my waist and swinging me around.

“Fred!”, the both of us started laughing before setting me on the ground again. I slapped his chest, but he just grinned at me.

“Hi love, I missed you.”, I felt my heart melt and put my arms around his neck while he was looking at me with ‘heart eyes’ like George would say.

“I missed you too even though we saw each other last night.”, Fred started smiling even harder at the blush that was appearing on my cheeks.

“So, ready to tell our families about us my little puff?”, I once again slapped his chest at the nickname that he had given me because of my house, and he dropped his forehead on mine.

“I don’t think we will ever be ready, but I can’t wait any longer.”, Fred nodded at that before squeezing my waist.

“Twin brother incoming.”, I laughed before letting him go, reluctantly, before turning to see Harry once again in a verbal fight with Malfoy.

“One day these two are going to end up together or shag, I am telling you.”, Fred snorted but agreed.

“Want to bet on it?”, we both looked at each other with wicked grins.

“What are we betting on?”, George suddenly appeared, probably back from snogging Alicia.

“When Harry and Malfoy will shag.”, George had a big grin on his face at that and we started talking about when it would happen before deciding on what the winner would get.

“Money is not enough in this bet we need something else.”, Fred and I both agreed and started thinking.

“I know! The losers must do anything that the winner wants them to do for a whole day!”, the twins looked at each other before nodding with matching grins on their face.

“It’s on!”

At that moment Harry came to join us looking frustrated and gave me a tired smile.

“Ready to go home sis?”

“I was born ready, unlike you.”, Harry looked absolutely done with me but then a grin formed on his face.

“Why don’t we test if that is true?”, that grin could only mean one thing, see who is the fastest at the train station.

“You are so on Potter.”

“Back at you Potter.”, the two of us looked at the twins who looked like they were enjoying this, particularly Fred.

“Alright get ready, set, go!”, Harry and I started running through the students who were trying to get to the station.

As we arrived practically at the same time at the station, we quite literally tumbled into Professor McGonagall. As we both got up and tried to stop ourselves from laughing, we could see her trying to be serious while looking down at us.

“I am afraid to ask this but what were you two doing?”, Harry and I looked at each other before looking at Minnie with a twin expression of innocence.

“Nothing professor, we were just getting our ten thousand steps.”, Harry nodded seriously before adding.

“It is verry important to complete them all and since we are in a train all day, we had to do them at some point.”

She looked absolutely done with us before letting a small smile appear.

“You two remind me of your father and your uncle, both menaces.”, Harry and I looked at her in fake shock.

“Us?”

“Menaces?”

“Never!”, we said in unison while the professor was trying not to laugh.

“Just like them.”, she had a distant smile on her face like she was reminiscing an old memory.

“Greet them for me, will you?”, we both nodded before flashing her a bright smile.

“Have a great summer professor!”, we then went to the train station where the twins were talking to Lee. Fred sends me a wink before getting back into his conversation.

How we managed to keep it from Harry, well that is a good question. The boy is simply too focused on Draco to even notice us. But this summer we are going to tell everyone at the big summer barbecue that we did every year when the school year ended.

The train ride was filled with laughter and trying all sorts of snacks and before we know it, we are back in London. We both say goodbye to our friends that we will see tomorrow for the barbecue and try to find our parents.

“Y/N, Harry!”, We turned at the voices and saw our parents waving at us with big grins on their faces.

As we get closer to them, I immediately hug my dad, relishing into his bear hug and the familiar smell of him. Before hugging my mother and relaxing into the smell of her perfume, it was good to be home.

We spent the evening talking about Hogwarts and what is happening while our parents tell us about what they had been doing. That night we went quickly to bed knowing that the next day would be a busy day and as I enter my room, I start to feel sleepy and manage to get into my night clothes before falling asleep on my bed.

The next morning was chaos, we had just managed to eat breakfast before our mother had thrown us out of the kitchen to get everything ready.

“Alright you two, we have a table to dress and guests to impress!”, our father looked proud of himself for his rhyme while Harry and I looked at him in fake disappointment.

“What has happened to you dad?”

“Yeah, what happened to the great James Potter?”, our dad looked at us annoyed before a mischievous grin appeared and he started slowly walking towards us.

“Oh really? I am going to show you what happened.”, before we could say anything dad was already running towards us, and Harry and I went in different directions screaming.

Of course, dad followed me and managed to pick me up before Harry came and started helping my dad with tickling me.

“No – stop”, I was laughing so hard that I couldn’t breathe or form a sentence and the two were laughing too while continuing the torture.

“Is that how you prepare lunch?”, the three of us turned to see Sirius and Remus looking at us with matching grins. Dad put me down to go greet them while Harry and I looked at each other with an idea forming in our minds.

“Who first?”, I whispered, and Harry looked quickly at the three adults before looking back at me.

“Uncle padfoot? As revenge for Christmas?”, we both nodded before going to greet our uncles.

Uncle moony quickly took me into his arms and smiled as I mumbled a hello in his chest and Harry quickly joined the hug, hugging us both at the same time.

“What? No hug for me?”, harry and I shared a smirk at Sirius’s complain before leaving Remus’s embrace.

“Always save best for last uncle padfoot, you know that!”, Remus let out a laughing scoff at that and Harry started going to Sirius first.

And before anyone could say anything the two of us had started tickling Sirius who fell on the ground from surprise and laughter.

“Alright – kids”, he let out a loud laugh when we tickled his side and we started doing it more. “Please – I – stop”, Harry and I looked at each other before deciding that it was enough torture, and both dropped on Sirius’s chest for a hug.

“That’s payback for Christmas!”, we both got up to go and take the cutlery in the kitchen to set up the table while James and Remus were laughing at Sirius’s face.

As we finished setting up the table the Weasleys started arriving with Molly holding up a large pot of probably a dessert. We greeted everyone and went to the table with Hermione who had also joined us. Fred was next to me and had put his arm around my chair pretending to do it to be able to talk more easily to Harry who was next to me.

The parents had finished cooking everything and we were all enjoying the meal before the twins started talking.

“So, who won the race in the end?”, George asked while looking at Harry and me. Everyone looked confused while Harry and I were trying to avoid our mother’s gaze.

“What race?”, suddenly the chicken was very interesting but then Fred opened his mouth.

“Well, Y/N said that she was born ready unlike Harry and they both took that as a challenge to race each other to the train station.”, our father looked proud of us while our mother was rolling her eyes in desperation.

“So, who did win?”, Sirius had a large grin while looking at us and Remus was trying not to smile but was failing.

“Well, we don’t know, because we stumbled into Professor McGonagall.”, everyone started laughing and our mother was looking like she was going to die.

“But don’t worry she found it funny!”, Harry smiled while saying that and then looked at our father and uncle padfoot.

“She said it actually reminded her of you two.”, the two shared a glance before looking at us with matching grins.

“That is because we also did that!”, Harry and I looked at each other in surprise before asking.

“And who won?”, Remus started laughing at that.

“None of them, they didn’t see Snape and fell on him!”, the whole table started laughing and even our mother laughed.

As they were starting to share memories of past pranks, I looked at Fred who was listening to the stories like it was a lesson, with a big smile.

“You know that prank reminds me of one of ours!”, everyone turned to George who started talking about a prank they had done where they had put red shampoo in all the showers of the other house.

“So that day is the only day I saw Y/N so angry, I nearly thought that she was going to break up with Fred!”, George seemed to realize what he had said because he looked at us with wide eyes. I had frozen and Fred seemed to be in shock too.

“Wait, breaking up with Fred?”, everyone turned to Harry who had asked the question before looking at us or me in specific.

“Well, it’s a funny story!”, I tried laughing but it came rather as a cough.

“Fred and I are dating.”, the whole table was silent and was looking at us with various expressions.

“Oh, I am so happy!”, everyone turned to Molly who had a large grin on her face, and it looked like she was going to cry of happiness.

“Since when?”, I looked at my father who was a bit red in the face and Fred answered this time.

“Since January, but I have had feelings for her for two years.”, I looked at Fred in shock, he had never told me that, but he was still looking at my dad.

“Wait, so you were dating, and I didn’t know?!”, Harry was upset I could tell, and I felt bad for not telling him, he deserved to know but we just wanted to keep it between us for a bit.

“We were going to tell you today after dessert. I’m sorry I kept it from you, but we wanted to wait before telling everyone.”, Harry still seemed hurt, and I decided to bring him into a hug.

“I’m sorry, I was just scared that it wasn’t something serious and that telling someone would burst the bubble of happiness, please don’t hate me?”, I whispered as Harry hugged me even closer.

“I could never hate you, love you too much for that little sis.”, I slapped his back while laughing and he gives me a happy grin.

“It’s only two minutes!”

“Yeah, but still older!”, Harry stuck his tong out and I do the same thing before hearing my uncle’s voice.

“So, you two are together and you want our blessing?”, Fred and I nodded, and I looked at my dad with puppy dog eyes.

“Oh no that is not going to work young lady!”, he was trying to look stern, but I knew he was cracking.

“Come on dad, you know that Fred is a good guy, you have said it yourself!”

“I am regretting saying that.”, he mumbled. My mother slapped him, and he started pouting.

“You are right, Fred is a good guy, and I am glad that you found someone that makes you happy.”, I smiled at my mother and said a soft thank you.

“It is difficult for me to see my little girl start dating but I guess you could have done worse.”, this time Remus slapped him, and he groaned. “But I am also happy that you found someone that is good for you.”, he gives me a soft smile and I feel tears come up, I always had a close relationship with my dad and having him now say that I could be with Fred was simply amazing.

“Thanks dad”, we smiled at each other before Sirius started talking.

“Well, I will also give my blessing thank you so much for asking.”, Remus gave Sirius a shove while Sirius was acting like he was hurt.

“I am also verry happy for you two!”, I smiled softly at my godfather and Remus sends me a wink.

After that dinner went back to normal and the night ended with Sirius and our dad running against each other to see who would win. Fred gave me a kiss goodbye when our parents weren’t looking, and we promised to try and see each other soon.

As I go up to my room to go sleep, I see Harry in the couch and decide to go sit next to him.

“Want to build a fort like when we were little and sleep in it?”, Harry gives me a soft smile before agreeing and we start to build our fort. We used to do it all the time before going to Hogwarts, but now we had less time to do it.

The fort was finally done, and we looked at each other proudly before going into the fort to get some sleep. We started talking about everything and anything when we heard a sound.

“Harry did you hear that?”, I whispered at my twin and he looked at me with a scared expression.

“Yeah, I did”, we started getting closer to each other and going to the end of the fort when we heard a sound and suddenly saw our father’s face.

Harry and I screamed and send a pillow in our father’s face who was laughing hard.

“You should’ve seen your faces!”, he was chuckling and then entered the fort.

“So got some more place for an old man?”, Harry and I sent him a grin before making some place between us.

“Where is mum?”

“She is already asleep! Drank too much wine!”, the three of us started giggling because at the end of the night our mother had been swaying in the kitchen like she was dancing.

The three of us settled down in the fort and as we were lying down Harry and I went to cuddle against our dad who sighed happily.

“I really miss you two when you are at Hogwarts.”

“We miss you too dad, and mom.”, we both squeezed his side which makes him bring us even closer to him.

“Thank you for accepting Fred.”, I whispered after a minute of silence and when I felt them bring me closer, I added. “He will never replace you both you know. You are both the most important men for me, and Fred is after that.”

They both chuckled at that, but it was more of a wet chuckle like they were trying not to cry.

“Love you too little sis.”, harry gives me a soft smile before throwing an arm around our father and me.

“Love you both so much.”, we all smiled at our father’s words and started to fall asleep when there was a sound.

Suddenly our mother appeared and the three of us screamed holding each other.

“So, this is where you three are! Make some room, mom coming through.”, we all laughed and made place for her and after some time we all fell asleep in our little fort.

#fred weasley #fred weasley x y/n #fred weasley x reader #fred weasley fic #fred weasley fanfiction #harry potter

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stop-breaking-my-heart-telltale · 3 years

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I’m sorry, but can I just go on a little rant about the Louis, clouis, and the Clem comic...?

I didn’t really talk about Louis in my overall review of the comic because I wanted that to be more contained to the content shown on the pages, Clementine’s relationship with AJ, and her as a character.... but the more I think about these comics and Louis, the more frustrated I become thinking about what Clementine abandoning everyone would do to him.

[... okay it’s not little anymore since I guess I can never just do anything simple when it comes to Louis, sorry my bad]

So, no surprise, we all know the comic’s bullshit by now. Clementine leaving everything and everyone behind because she’s not happy is dumb, AJ just letting her go is dumb, and Clem going to the mountains on crutches and a peg leg to find this so-called happiness is dumb.

Now that we’ve established it’s dumb, I wanna talk about Louis because I got a lot of built up feelings about how bullshit this storyline is with how Clementine would not only abandon AJ, but also abandon Louis.

Because let me tell you..... his heart would be broken beyond repair and I need to talk about why.

Sigh.... so.... muh boy.

Before he met Clementine, Louis was this laidback, irresponsible, but caring and musical person who kept his head down to avoid conflict and never looked at the future. He was the kind of person who took things one day at a time, saw survival as a day-to-day task, and said that the future doesn’t exist, there’s only today. You get the point, he was never too concerned with things because they always seemed to work out, and if they didn’t, then that sucks and that’s why we should appreciate every day while we have it.

Louis is shown to be charismatic and friendly, he spends his free time playing piano and card games, but no one really takes him seriously. Not even Marlon, his best friend for 8+ years. While he doesn’t seem to be on bad terms with anyone [including Aasim, they just act like people who disagree with the other’s point of view and have had the same argument many times, but that doesn’t mean they hate each other, y’know?] he also doesn’t appear super close with anyone outside of Marlon and possibly Violet, but even then.

Marlon’s shown to have little faith in him with the way he talks about if Louis will even show up to hunt. He has a controlling grip on Louis that’s prominent during the confrontation scene when he uses intimidation to try to convince Louis to not interfere. Oh, and there’s the fact that Marlon’s been lying to Louis for the past year about the twins and then continued to lie to his face about what really happened to Brody... which isn’t great when you consider how Louis was the only one who had blind faith in him as a leader and, according to Marlon, was the only one who couldn’t see how pathetic he always was.

Violet, while having a few more nicer moments with him than Marlon, still invalidates him and his feelings several times throughout the first half of the game which makes me wonder how close they ever were, or at least if Violet ever considered him a close friend to begin with. And no, a small monologue in the dorms doesn’t make everything better or confirm they were brotp the whole time... especially when once they’re on the boat, Louis might as well not exist because Violet can’t be bothered to acknowledge what happened to him or inquire about how he’s doing. I guess she just didn’t have time react while standing in her cell for several unbothered minutes-- no wait, it’s she already reacted off screen. Right. Good writing is good.

What I’m getting at here is that even though Louis is surrounded by people who he genuinely cares about, there is an argument to be made that he’s a lonely person. Hell, he’s aware of his loneliness when he says that no one hears past his music and jokes. I mean, how many nights do you think he spent by himself playing the piano because no one wanted to hear it? Are they like Violet and crack jokes about how he doesn’t have actual talent? Probably, given that someone literally carved “you suck at playing” onto the side of the damn piano.

Oh, and let’s touch on that backstory of his. Louis grew up wealthy with two parents who loved him and each other, and they gave him anything he wanted except singing lessons. Louis says he wanted to be a real musician. But I guess his father didn’t like that idea and told him no, with the [as Louis puts it] dumb dad lesson of, “You get to be happy, or you get to be rich, can’t be both.” ...which is interesting given that Louis and his family were stupid rich but also.... were they not happy? well, that doesn’t make sense because little Louis knew that if he broke up their marriage, they would be hurt.

So yeah, Louis was so upset that his father continually refused to let him take singing lessons that he broke into the man’s credit cards and faked an affair, which led to his parents divorcing... and then he spit his father’s words back in his face.

Then they dumped him at Ericson. And the walkers came.

There’s so much to unpack from the story he tells that it could be it’s own analysis, but basically.... Louis is aware of why what he did was fucked up, and he carries it with him every day.

He regrets what he did, chews himself out for being such a “vindictive fuckhead” [and the amount of force used in that line tells you a lot, like how it’s not the first time he’s chastised himself like this] and he admits that he doesn’t even know the person he’s talking about. Yet, he still sees himself as bad, saying that they [I assume the staff] told him and the other kids they’re bad people. I don’t doubt that Louis internalized that which played a huge role in the confidence and self-esteem issues he has during tfs.

Anyway, I’ll come back to this later, but when you take that amount of guilt and regret, and mix it with the fact that they dropped him off at this school that was supposed to make him better.... then the walkers came and those teachers, staff, and headmaster? Gone. Left a bunch of kids to fend for themselves, with the exception of Ms. Martin [but given how she looks when we find her I doubt she lasted that long] and I cannot imagine how horrifying that was for all of them. The dead are up eating people, and if you die you become one of them... and the people you thought you could rely on just fucking left you to die at this school.

Every kid in that school has trauma and abandonment issues from before and after the world went to shit, every last one, and Louis isn’t the exception here. Over the years, a lot of kids died and they’ve all seen horrible shit. They all knew they were never going to see their families again, and as far as we know, no one came to get their kids at the beginning. They had to find ways of coping while trying to survive, and all they had left was each other.

Louis copes with music and games and jokes. He’s built up this persona where it seems like he’s unaffected by the comments the others make, that the death and suffering he’s gone through is in the past, that he is confident and open to those around him.

But then Clementine and AJ show up, and Louis grows close with both of them. They had immediate chemistry upon first meeting, he was the one who looked after AJ since it seems like everyone else saw him as a little terror, and he went out of his way to be kind and make them comfortable.

When they go hunting with him, Louis and Clementine have a moment after taking care of the walker where they lower their guards a bit-- Louis gives her more in-depth reasons for his views of survival, and going off her expression, it gets to her and makes her think.... but they’ve know each other a day and he’s not quick to infodump his life story or let her in, so he cuts the conversation short.

Then we have the Marlon confrontation scene that I have gone over so many times in the past. I won’t dillydally with it too long but..... Clementine appeals to Louis, who curls in on himself because of the control Marlon has on him. He wants to help, and hell, he knows this is wrong but he’s so used to not getting involved that he gets defensive.... plus, he’s known Clementine for two days, and he’s known Marlon for 8+ years.... he wants to believe Marlon but you can tell he doesn’t want this, either. It takes Clementine talking to him to give him courage to stand between her and Marlon’s gun and it’s a lot.

AJ shoots Marlon and everything goes to shit, and Louis is a goddamn mess. His best friend was murderer right in front of him, so add that to the trauma list, and he’s overwhelmed with all these feelings that again.... they keep getting invalidated by Violet because “Marlon was a liar and murderer, therefore you shouldn’t feel bad about his death. Get over yourself, Louis, you can be such a shithead sometimes.”

Oh yeah Vi, I guess he should care more about two people he’s known for a total of two days rather than for the safety of the people [including you] he’s grown up with and cared about for 8+ years.... makes sense.

So yeah, little to no support during this time. Alone again.

And just because I have to make this clear so no one gets a hair up their ass-- both Louis and Violet are wrong here. Kicking them out isn’t the solution, but neither is acting like AJ was right to commit murder just because it was Marlon.

But plots gotta plot, so they get voted out and you can see that Louis is conflicted about the whole thing. He wants them gone, but at the same time, he knows what kicking them out means. You can see it on his face that he’s not okay with kicking them out. He’s hurting when he’s there in the dorms telling them how the vote went... he literally doesn’t know what else to do. He just knows that everything hurts, Clem and AJ caused it, and he wants the pain to stop. He even tries to justify it to himself by figuring that they’ve done this before so they’ll be fine. Not a great thing to say, Lou.

Anyway, we know the story, Clem and AJ come back and Louis once again sees the consequences of acting out of pain.... AJ is shot because Louis was hurt and he made a bad decision that he’s gotta live with.... something that he’s done before, and this affirms to him that he’s bad. He wishes he could take it back, and goes as far as to admit that to Clementine during the archery scene.

By the way, credit to him for his apology to her. It’s rare in these games that Clem gets a genuine apology from someone who hurt her and doesn’t turn around to repeat the hurtful behavior, y’know? Plus, I can think of plenty of characters who owed Clem an apology in the past or if they did apologize, it was half-assed.

You can feel how conflicted he is with this whole thing-- learning who Marlon really was and what he did, feeling something for Clementine before everything went down and not knowing how to handle those feelings afterward, caring about AJ and understanding why he thought shooting was the best choice but still hurting that his friend is dead....

And the thing is.... Louis forgives her for so much, as she does him, and through all of that bullshit, they manage to develop that strong connection that turns romantic. Louis lets himself be fully vulnerable with her and is honest about his feelings, how she listened when no one else did and seeing him for more than just the persona he put on.

This works on Clementine’s side, too. Clementine has been through her own fair share of bullshit-- trauma, abandonment, loss, injury, you name it. She’s made mistakes, done terrible things, and has been in enough groups to know that romance usually ends in heartbreak.... and yet, she’s willing to open herself up to Louis and admit she feels a lot for him.

Is it a little rushed? Yep. Could it have been handled better? Of course, most things this season could’ve, but what we got was pretty good.

So Clementine and Louis are romantically involved now, the raiders attack, and she saves him... and boy does Louis feel guilty about that one, too. He feels bad enough that he questions why she would pick him because he can’t fathom his life being worth saving over another’s. He doesn’t see himself as useful, and even though Clementine is literally his girlfriend at this point, his self-esteem is so all over the place that he can’t understand why she would have him at her side.

And when Clementine tells him that he’s too important to her, he’s too baffled to even give a response. He looks at her in disbelief like he wasn’t expecting her to say that. But this shows that at the beginning of their relationship, he still doubts himself, and through her working with him, he begins to build up that strength in himself.

He becomes brave enough to share what got him sent to the school with her, and he plays Don’t Be Afraid for everyone at the party and like.... for once, everyone is listening to him. Really listening to him. They’re not talking shit about his musical skills, they’re not ignoring him or the feelings he’s putting into the song, they’re sitting there with him and I just..... if you watch him, you can see that his eyes get pretty glossy throughout the song. The moment meant something to everyone.

There’s also the fact that Clementine asked him to come with her and AJ onto the boat, and to be the one in charge of the bomb... that’s a huge responsibly and he feels the pressure of that. He starts to panic a bit about if he can do it, because what if he fucks up? What if he gets them caught and makes everything worse? What if something happens to Clementine and he can’t do anything about it?

She’s there to reassure him that she believes in him, and that he can do this. They’re going to get everyone back, and he needs to focus... then he asks her to slap him which why would you? that’s dumb, so Clementine smooches him instead and like.... he physically relaxes into her because he’s comfortable and trusts her in this situation.

Also, he loves her and cares about this mission enough to cover himself and his fancy jacket in walker guts.... sure, he complains while doing so but how else is he gonna cope with rubbing rotten guts on himself to blend in with a herd of walkers?

Skipping ahead so that we’re not here all day, I wanna talk about the walk back to the school because it’s one of the most important clouis moments in the game and a huge reason that solidifies why the comic is bullshit.

Louis went off on his own to go out and find them. He didn’t know where they would be, he just knew that he had to go out and find them after making sure everyone was okay back at the school because he couldn’t bare the thought that he had lost them. And the way the AJ gets so excited to see him? and the group hug??

At this point, Louis has grown so much as a character. With Clementine by his side to support him, he’s grown stronger and more reliable. Remember how he never thought about the future? Well, now he is because his relationship with Clementine has given him a reason to long for a future. He talks about building this imaginary house with her, one he knows they can’t physically build... but it’s his way of saying we can build a home together, that he wants a future with her and AJ and everyone else. It’s such a personal conversation that flows so easy between them. Louis is more comfortable talking to her about things from his past, which is something he didn’t want to do back in ep1.

He confides in her how he’s feeling after he shot and killed Dorian, he tells her that having a home means protecting it and I just.... it’s so good, okay? And from Clementine’s side, you can feel how at ease she is with him, too. Just the way she smiles at him as they’re walking? like he’s the cutest thing and she’s so happy to have him with her?

But then we gotta deal with Minerva’s crazy ass on the bridge and well, AJ shoots Tenn and Louis is having flashbacks to Marlon and it’s not great. That’s a whole thing, and he ends up separated from them while escaping.

We don’t get to see Louis’ reaction to Clementine getting bit and losing her leg since I guess that puts a damper on the overly happy ending. But, going off of what we know about him and what I’ve explained [which isn’t even all of it, this isn’t a full Louis character analysis. if it was, it would be much longer and in multiple parts... believe it or not, I’m trying to not make this too long and only sorta failing...] we can get an idea of how he would react.

Um, to say he was upset is an understatement.

Because remember, he had no time to think and climbed over the fence, thinking he could get them to climb over and they could get away, but it didn’t work. He ended up leaving them in order to save himself since walkers were closing in on him.

But you know that he’d blame himself for the bite. A lot of, “if I had just stayed” and “I should’ve climbed back over, I should’ve stayed with you.” I’m sure there were points where it looked like Clem wouldn’t make it and I can’t imagine how much hurt he went through watching her suffer and heal from losing a leg like that.

Not only that, but knowing that AJ was the one to do it? And him thinking about what Clem’s death would do to AJ after all this? There isn’t a doubt in my mind that Louis would take care of AJ if she died. He cares about AJ, and he loves Clementine, so he be there for both of them, even if he’s still hurting from Tenn’s death.

However, Clementine didn’t die. She survived the bite and amputation, and when we flashforward, she and Louis are still happily together. Louis is right there next to her at dinner, and he’s the one to help her with her crutches. He’s there to go over future plans to meet the traveling caravan, and Clementine wants him to be the one to go.

Oh, and Louis once again forgives AJ for shooting Tenn, claiming that he understands that AJ saw something that he couldn’t. Like with Marlon, he’s not happy Tenn’s dead but he can see why AJ did it to save his life.

I just..... happy ending. Clementine and Louis are together and she’s truly happy to have found a home for her and AJ with him at Ericson.

....But then the comic thought it would be fun to say “nah.”

The comic isn’t canon, I’m still insulted that it would ever consider itself as such, but even so I can’t help but feel so frustrated about how this would destroy Louis.

He finally found someone he would consider his best friend, not just his girlfriend. She saw past that funny man persona and he trusted her enough to let her past this wall he built around himself. He let himself become vulnerable around her, he named his song after her. Their initials are carved into his piano with a heart surrounding them. He loved her.

Clementine left him feeling loved, something he probably hasn’t truly felt since he was a little boy with his parents before their divorce. She loved him even after hearing his past because she knew that wasn’t him anymore, and she helped him build the confidence he needed to step up. Because of Clementine, Louis wants to enjoy every day while also looking at the future. He isn’t lonely anymore, he has her and AJ. He’s truly happy.

So to tell me that Louis would wake up one morning only to have AJ tell him that Clementine’s gone, she’ been planning an escape without telling anyone because she wasn’t happy...? I’m sorry, but if you think that wouldn’t leave Louis absolutely devastated, then you know nothing about him as a character.

This idea is just.... look, Louis is perceptive. That’s a big part of his character, he’s perceptive of those around him. If Clementine was showing signs of being unhappy or depression, he would see it. He would notice a change. He would be able to tell if something was off, and he would ask her about it. Louis is the type of person to ask you what you need. What can he do to help? What do you need to feel better? And if you don’t know, it’s okay, he’ll help you figure it out in any way possible.

Plus, the comic suggests that there are times where she went off on her own but came back [probably doing her escape prep ugh] and you expect me to believe that Louis wouldn’t notice that or wonder what she’s doing? Wouldn’t sense that something’s going on?

After she’s gone, he’s going to blame himself for not being enough. He couldn’t make her happy and he was a fool to think he ever could. AJ lost the only family he’s known since he was born because Louis couldn’t help her, couldn’t do anything to stop her from leaving.

And for him to realize that she didn’t love him? Clementine, the girl he thought the world of because of how strong and confident and in-charge she was, because she saw him for who he was..... she left him, abandoned him... and she couldn’t even be bothered with a goodbye.... that says that she didn’t care all that much about him in the end.

You KNOW that he would think he had this coming, too. How could the universe allow him to fall in love and be happy with someone who loved him back after what he did to his parents? He would feel so heartbroken that he would see this as some sort of karma for breaking up his parents happy marriage as a kid years before he ever met Clementine and before the apocalypse.

I fucking can’t.... I don’t have the words to fully explain how much I hate this. Louis wouldn’t be okay afterward, and I doubt he’d ever fully recover. I wasn’t joking when I mentioned before that Louis would stop playing piano. How could he sit there and play when I he can see is their initials and remember the night she confessed to him? When he named his song after her? Clementine left and took the music with her because Louis wouldn’t have it in him... something that he used to cope would be ruined and that’s just.... it’s fucking awful.

Not only that, but now he has AJ who I assume is hurting just as much [though the comics inaccurately assume he would just let Clem go sooo... yeah] and he would be the only one Louis would really talk to about it, but then again.... what if AJ doesn’t wanna talk about it? What if AJ starts to act out and things just become terrible and Louis is just too overwhelmed?

I just.... UGH. That’s how I feel. UGH.

Clementine from the comic? Not her. She would never fucking do this to Louis, AJ, or anyone else at Ericson, and you would know that if you played the tfs.

Sigh.... sorry, I just needed to get this all out. I haven’t seen anyone talk about how Clem leaving would affect Louis and I’ve gotten some asks/come across some posts about Louis that have left me incredibly annoyed.... well, I was annoyed before because of the comics, so my annoyances with those things were only heightened. So yeah... I wanted to talk about Louis’ character in hopes of explaining why he would be so hurt if this comic was canon.

Which it’s not. So it’s fine.

How are we all feelin’ at this point, by the way? I know I’m not the only one still annoyed with the comic, so I hope y’all are doin’ okay. Hope you’re stayin’ chill and thinking about your faves to help cope with this mess hahaha

#twdg louis #twdg clementine #twdg clouis #twdg aj #twdg marlon #twdg violet #clouis #twdg #sometimes i just need to talk about louis okay #one day i'll do a full character analysis that goes over everything #but today isn't that day #long post

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amazingmaeve · 3 years

Text

red

loving him was red

summary:

george always wanted to open a joke shop with his brother. when they decide to get back at umbridge and leave school to pursue his dream he also leaves behind his girlfriend.

warnings - angst, a bit of fluff

word count - 2648

a/n - a writing challenge that @chokemepansy is doing! also got inspired by Taylor Swifts red! angst prompt 42 from her prompt list!

h.p masterlist // george weasley

George to Y/N was one of the most perfect people in her life. When she met him it changed her life for the best. He came in her life when she needed something good, when her whole life was horrible he was the only light in her life. But they also had a lot of arguments that had one or the other storming out saying hurtful things.

But they always found their way back to each other.

No matter what one or the other would apologize for the words they said and the other would smile and pull them in for a kiss. No matter what that’s how it always ended. It wasn’t the healthiest of relationships but when George was there for her it always made Y/N’s feel better and feel loved.

Even though she hated the fights she loved the time she spent with him. The times where they would just cuddle while Y/N read a book. George would just play with her hair and sometimes would just watch as her eyes glazed across the book with interest. Sometimes would bite her lip if she’s confused by something. Other times she helped him with his studies and it would help some of the times.

George and Y/N would also just sneak around the Hogwarts castle and make out in corners whilst skipping some of her classes. She normally didn’t do this but George convinced her to skip some of the classes. Luckily it usually didn’t hurt her grades since she studied a lot.

Y/N was also convinced to help Fred and George with their pranks but if the prank seemed too harsh she wouldn’t do that. Fred and Y/N were friends but not the closest friends in the world. They often only talked when George was around since nothing else tied them to each other. She didn’t hate him and he didn’t hate her.

They would also go to the Three Broomsticks for dates and would just sit and talk about each other’s day. Y/N would just get lost in George’s eyes and the way that they sparkled whenever he mentioned the pranks he and Fred did. It warmed her heart to see him so happy about something.

Towards the end of their relationship the arguments have weirdly started to die down and George and Y/N started talking through their problems.

Maybe this was because of Umbridge coming to Hogwarts that year the relationship has matured more and they started to act like adults coming into their 7th year. Though one big thing was hanging over their head.

The future.

Y/N wanted to be a curse breaker and George wanted to run a joke shop with Fred and Y/N was okay with that and would support him through everything. But the thing was that Voldemort was on the rise and his supporters were coming back. It scared a lot of people especially Y/N since she was muggle born and her family were muggles and could be hurt by this. She knew if she wanted to be a curse breaker she would have to be more brave.

She would often talk to George about this instead of keeping this stuff in. He would comfort her by letting her bury her head in his chest as he rested his chin on her head. He caressed her hair as she wrapped her arms around his waist and felt herself start to calm down a bit.

George was starting to be a comfort hotline for her.

Y/N also noticed that George has become more secretive throughout the year and she just cut it down to him and Fred planning and making pranks. She didn’t know it was a secret army that was created when Umbridge cut back on the defense against the dark arts.

It hurt her that George didn’t tell her about it or that she wasn’t even invited to become a part of this army. She wanted to be able to help. She felt useless and it sank to the bottom of her stomach that she wasn’t even trusted by her own boyfriend.

Before she could even argue with him, he grabbed her arm and pulled her to his room.

“George what the hell was that,” Y/N snapped crossing her arms across her chest. She was just talking to Luna and Neville in the common room when he dragged her to his room.

“I needed to talk to you,” George rushed out rubbing the back of his neck.

“Why didn’t you tell me about Dumbledore's army,” Y/N angrily questioned ignoring what he had said. George huffed, rolling his eyes, feeling frustrated.

“Y/N let me-,” George was about to talk but was interrupted by Y/N.

“No seriously was I not trusted by you or was it for you to get away from me?” Y/N asked, clenching her jaw as her fist curled at her side from the anger coursing through her veins.

“I think we should break up,” George blurted out making Y/N’s eyes widened. She didn’t want to break up with him over this. Yes she was angry at the moment but it didn’t mean she wanted to lose him.

“What-what,” Y/N stuttered her fist un curling from the shocking news she had just got.

“Me and Fred are going to be starting a joke shop next year,” George explained, not meeting her eyes.

“That’s it George I said I’d support you through that,” Y/N huffed and ran her fingers through her hair.

“I just don’t see you in my future,” George says quietly, his eyes traveling to his feet, not wanting to see her reaction to this. He promised himself he’d do this for her, so that she wouldn’t get hurt.

“I see,” Y/N whispers then biting her lip trying to not let the tears fall from her eyes. But her shoulders slumped when she heard the words tumble from his mouth. Sadness raked through her body and she could feel her feet start to wobble and her eyes start to glisten. “Well goodbye George,” She turned away and left the room not wanting to see his reaction to this.

Y/N decided to focus on her studies since she would be taking most of them tomorrow and needed to pass them to be a curse breaker. She needed to stop thinking about George so she could have at least a good career. She didn’t get much sleep that night.

But the next day as she finished her last N.E.W.T.S Y/N watched as Umbridge walked out of the room since she heard some noises outside of the classroom. It was a shock to everyone as George and Fred came riding in on their broomsticks with fireworks in their hands.

She didn’t get up from her seat like everyone else. She just sat down playing with her hands as the twins left the classroom creating a W in the sky.

After the school year was over Y/N was happy that she didn’t have to go back to the place that gave her so many memories with George. But when she applied to be a curse breaker she was luckily accepted but that meant she had to work for Bill Weasley.

Y/N met him a few times when she stayed over at the Weasleys house for Christmas. Bill of course recognized her and didn’t ask anything about her or George since he heard they broke up. She was thankful for that and found it easy to get along with the eldest Weasley. He was a good person to talk to.

For that whole year Y/N got used to the job only going on a few missions since she was the newbie. But things got weird when Voldemort killed Dumbledore by Snape.

She was invited to Bill and Fleurs wedding and she didn’t know if she should accept it or not since Y/N knew George would be there and it would be so awkward. But she did accept it eventually since Bill was such a good friend to her and she also heard about him getting attacked and wanted to make sure he was okay.

She didn’t take anyone as a date, she’s tried to date after school but it never worked out they always ended things before they got to serious.

Y/N managed to avoid George and even Fred that night but before it could end death eaters came to the wedding and attacked. She didn’t know what the hell was going on but she does know that Harry, Hermione, and Ron were going to go hunt for the Horcruxes.

She left Weasley's burrow with worry in the pit of her stomach. Fear filled her bones, fear for the trio and the Weasley’s. Y/N was even worried about her parents, who weren’t a part of the wizarding world which was worse since they couldn’t protect themselves. She went home that night, nervousness filling her blood as she entered her parents house.

Ever since she graduated from Hogwarts Y/N lives with her parents until she can get enough money to buy a place for herself.

Luckily her parents were okay and she went to sleep a little bit better. But still she worried for the Weasley’s and anyone who crossed Voldemort and his little posse. She just hoped everyone would be fine and wouldn’t end up dead.

The following year she kept in contact with Bill, even though she was staying with her parents to protect them.

Once Y/N heard about the battle she immediately signed up for it. She didn’t want anyone to get hurt. She wanted to help protect the people at the school so they could see the daylight the next morning. She didn’t care if she ran into George since this was a life or death situation.

The battle was a hard one. A lot of people died. Remus and Tonks being the ones closest to her. For a moment there Y/N and everyone around her even thought that Harry was dead and Voldemort as victorious. But luckily Harry wasn’t.

They won. But what did it come with. Casualties, families who wouldn’t see their children ever again. Even though they did win, Y/N felt like she failed them, she failed there families. After the war she even had nightmares about her friends and family dying and her not being able to save them.

She always woke up in a sweat.

The nights where Y/N couldn’t sleep she thought about George. What he was doing? Was he fine? Did he ever think about her? She usually shook those thoughts out of her head but ever since she broke up with him it felt like emptiness filled her life. But she masked that with a fake smile and burying herself in work and she was still doing this.

Y/N’s parents encouraged her to get her own place but reassured her that they weren’t trying to kick her out. She knew that but it felt like she was a burden on them so she just decided to move out and found a cottage in the forest. It wasn’t as scary as the forbidden forest since there were no monsters in this one.

The silence welcomed her with a warm hug. Y/N didn’t hate it; she liked being alone at the moment. She often spent her time watching shows late at night then waking up early to go to work with bags under her eyes.

One day Y/N went to go and get some ice cream in Diagon alley she saw a flash of red hair in the crowd and she immediately knew who it was.

George.

Y/N knew it could’ve been Fred but she knew George too well to know that was him. So she did what most people would’ve done. Ran behind an alley so he didn’t see her.

Before she could fully get behind the building he caught her eye and yelled out for her.

“Y/N is that you,” George asks looking between the buildings with a smile gracing his lips. She stopped in her tracks and took a deep breath before turning around with a fake smile appearing on her face.

“George it’s so nice to see you,” Y/N says while walking up to stand in front of him.

Before she could say anything else he wrapped his arms around her waists and hugged her. He buried his face in her neck while Y/N placed her arms around his neck and took in his familiar scent she loved oh so much. She missed it. She didn’t want to miss him but Y/N couldn’t help it.

“How’ve you been,” George asks kindly, finally breaking free from the hug.

“Oh I’ve been great,” Y/N lied straight through her teeth as she stared up at him. There was an awkward silence before George spoke.

“I wanted to ask a question,” George wrings his hands in front of his stomach.

“You already did,” Y/N responds with a smirk, a real one this time. “I’m kidding, go ahead,” She says after seeing the look on his face.

“I wanted to know if you want to meet up later so we could catch up,” George asks nervously as stands there with his eyes at his feet.

“Uh,” Y/N started to say and she didn’t even know what she was going to answer him with but deciding it would be good to catch up with some old friends she answered, “Yes.”

“Really,” George says shocked, he thought she’d say no since the last time they talked he dumped her.

“Yes I need to get out more anyways,” Y/N gives him a half smile before getting a pen and grabbing his hand. “This is my address, pick me up at….” She says looking up at him wanting to know when he wanted to go out.

“9 darling,” George answered and looked at the writing on his hand after she let it go. Y/N felt butterflies enter her stomach when he called her that. It’s been so long she’s been called that by someone she cares about.

When Y/N got home she immediately regretted agreeing to go on this date with George. She knew that seeing him again would bring back some old feelings that were being harbored.

She decided that when George got to the cottage Y/N would talk to him about all of her feelings.

“Hey,” Y/N greeted when George showed up at her front door with some flowers. She took them with a smile. “Come in,” She opened the door wider letting him come in.

“Nice place,” George complimented.

“Thanks,” Y/N felt nervous again when she thought about what she wanted to talk to him about. “I need to talk to you,” She rushed out as she stood in front of him.

“Knew this was gonna come,” George muttered as his smile dropped. “Before you say anything can I say something,” He asked with a pleading look on his face, Y/N nodded. “I wanted to say that breaking up with you was one of the biggest mistakes of my life and ever since I did it I’ve never been the same,” George takes a break before saying. “I'd take our relationship back in a heartbeat love.”

“I can’t do that George,” Y/N whispered as her eyes shined with tears. George’s head dropped once he heard her. “I want to, I want to take you back so much but I can’t,” Her lip quivered as a tear rolled off her cheek.

“Then why don’t you,” George whispered hope filling his eyes.

“I’m just destined to have no love.”

#asteria’s 4k celebration #george weasley x reader #george weasley smut #george weasley drabble #george weasley angst #george weasley #harry potter x reader #harry potter smut

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sleepdeprivedsloth · 3 years

Text

Gonna Getcha

[Haikyuu - Atsumu, Osamu]

summary: Atsumu notices that Osamu is stressing out and suggests that they play a game to help brighten his mood. Of course, Osamu doesn’t really have a say in the matter, he knows that he’ll end up laughing whether he agrees to play or not. (platonic Miya twins tickle fic)

potential warnings: swearing, tickling

words: 1.8 k

a/n: for those of you who haven’t watched s4 yet, don’t worry there are no spoilers! on a more serious note, please don’t romantically ship these two. i hate that i feel the need to say this, but this is purely just siblings tickling each other for fun. anyways! please enjoy everyone <3

Osamu leaned back in his desk chair, staring at the English worksheet in front of him. He let out a small grunt of frustration and closed his eyes, taking a quick mental break.

The Miya twins had gotten back home from volleyball practice a bit earlier than usual because their coach wanted the team to focus on studying for their upcoming exams. Osamu was trying to make good use of this generously-given free time by working on homework. On the other hand, Atsumu planned to use his free time to lounge around and get some “much needed” relaxation.

Resting on the top bunk bed in the twins’ shared room, Atsumu was mindlessly scrolling through his phone when he heard Osamu’s grunting. He glanced up towards his brother and saw that he looked absolutely exhausted with his head tilted back and a slight crease occupying the space in between his eyebrows.

Osamu must have felt Atsumu’s piercing stare because not so long after he closed them, his eyes snapped back open. He abruptly swiveled his chair around and locked eyes with Atsumu, offering his own stare in return. “Why are ya creepily staring at me like that?”

The blonde-haired twin simply ignored the question, choosing instead to ask one of his own. “Ya look seriously stressed out, man. Wanna play a game?”

Osamu breaks eye contact as he sighs, turning back around to continue working. “No dumbass. Can’t ya see I’m busy?”

Once more disregarding the question thrown at him, Atsumu pondered aloud, “Hey Samu, ya know what game we haven’t played in forever?”

Deciding to humor his twin, Osamu hummed out a quick “hmm” in response, prompting Atsumu to continue.

“Gonna Getcha.”

Osamu feels his body immediately stiffen at the name, countless memories of the brothers playing the childish game flashed through his mind. With their parents being away at work so often when the two were younger, they created Gonna Getcha as a fun way to pass the time. It was just like hide and seek, but the stakes were much higher. Once the hider had been found, the seeker would tickle them silly until they tapped out. The mere thought gave Osamu chills.

Atsumu kept his predatory stare on his twin. “Why don’t we play right now? Y’know, for old time’s sake.”

Osamu instantly recognized the tone in Atsumu’s voice. It wasn’t a suggestion or request, it was a warning that he needed to escape while he still could. Turning his head around to look at his brother's face, Osamu saw the dangerously playful glint in his eyes. “What are we, fricking six years old? Grow up, Tsumu, geez.”

Never breaking eye contact, a grin spread across Atsumu’s face as he suddenly started counting down. “Thirty. Twenty-nine. Twenty-eight…”

The grey-haired twin’s eyes widened. He came to the sad realization that the two were going to play Gonna Getcha, whether Osamu agreed to it or not, but he wasn’t about to waste anymore potential hiding time by haggling with Atsumu.

Practically leaping out of the desk chair, Osamu ran out of their bedroom door, quickly closing it behind him. He raced throughout the house searching for a hiding spot, which was pretty pointless considering the twins both knew this place like the back of their hands.

He ran from room to room, eyes darting around for a somewhat decent place to hide, when he came across the supply closet in the hallway. Internally deciding that it was much better than standing out in the open, Osamu scurried inside, closed the door behind him, and sat down in the cramped space beside the miscellaneous boxes.

Not long after he got situated, Osamu heard their bedroom door burst open with Atsumu louding calling out, “I’m gonna getcha!” Footsteps could be faintly heard going in and out of different rooms, accompanied with the occasional “Gonna getcha!” tease. Osamu honestly felt like he was six years old again, giddily waiting for Atsumu to find him.

When Atsumu’s footsteps sounded close to his hiding spot, Osamu froze and held his breath. The footsteps came and passed, going off in the direction of the kitchen.

After waiting until he couldn’t hear the footsteps anymore, Osamu quickly got to his feet, planning to make a run for it back to the bedroom. Atsumu would never think to look back in there, right? Slowly opening the closet door, Osamu cringed slightly at the soft creaking before peeking his head out. Once assured that the coast was clear, Osamu stepped out and dashed to their bedroom with a victorious smile on his lips.

He stopped short and his smile immediately fell when he saw a certain blonde waiting for him, lazily leaning against the doorway with a confident smirk. Grey eyes met brown for a brief moment before Osamu turned around and attempted to bolt away. Unfortunately for him, Atsumu quickly launched himself forward, shouting out, “Gonna getcha!”

The two tumbled down to the floor. Osamu was left lying flat on his stomach as Atsumu straddled his back. Quickly recovering from the fall, the grey-haired brother tried to fight back and push his twin off of him, but his arms could reach back far enough.

Laughing at Osamu’s fruitless struggles, Atsumu teased, “I gotcha!”

Osamu gave up on physically fighting back and went limp against the floor. “Get offa me, Tsumu, yer fat ass is crushing me!”

“Hmm.. no. How about I do this?” Atsumu set his fingers over Osamu’s shirt and scribbled them into his sides. Osamu’s body jerked as if he had been electrocuted, and started shaking his head back and forth as short chuckles spilled out of his mouth. Knowing that verbal teasing had wonderous effects on his brother, Atsumu decided to be a little shit, gasping in fake shock. “Oh no way! Is this tickling ya, Samu?”

Osamu’s struggling started up again at the taunting words. “Y-yohou knohohow ihit dohoes! Stohop!”

“How would I have known that yer this ticklish? I woulda never guessed!”

“Yohohou ahahare suhuch an asshohohole!” Osamu’s laughter became louder as Atsumu switched his scribbling to spontaneously jabbing. “Ihihihi’m gohohohonna kihihihill youhuhuhu!!”

Atsumu ignored the giggle-filled threat, instead choosing to take the tickling a step further. “Huh, I wonder where yer death spot is… that one spot that will make you go absolutely crazy with laughter.” Atsumu slipped his hands underneath Osamu’s loose shirt, wiggling closer to his brother’s stomach. Obviously, he already knew where Osamu’s death spot was, but it was so much more fun when he got to see how his teasing made his twin squirm. “Why don’t ya just tell me where it is?”

Osamu shrieked when Atsumu went under his thin layer of protection and brushed his fingers against his bare skin. He grabbed at his hair to ground himself as he felt the torturous hands traveling closer and closer to his sensitive stomach. “Yohohohou ahahahahalready knohohow whehehere ihit ihis, yahahaha fuhuhuhuhucking shihihihit!!”

“What foul language! I just wish to hear my dearest brother laugh.” Atsumu wiggled his fingers to get them underneath Osamu so that they were squished in between the floor and his stomach. Once in position, he paused his fluttering fingers. “Ya ready?”

Osamu giggled and twitched in anticipation, “Dohohon’t doho ihihit!!”

“Do what?” Atsumu smirked knowingly.

In his panic, Osamu missed the obvious trap and shouted out, “Tihihickle mehe thehere!”

“Well since ya asked so nicely~” Atsumu curled his fingers and vibrated them deep into Osamu’s stomach, knowing from many childhood tickle fights that he could never stand this method.

Loud bouts of laughter were forcefully released from Osamu, his mouth open in a face-splitting smile. “TSUHUHUHUHUMU NOHOHAHAHAHAHA!!”

“Ahh yes, beautiful laughter,” Atsumu playfully teased. “That seriously has to be my favorite sound to ever exist. Mind if I record it and set it as my ringtone?”

Osamu could barely hear the taunts through his booming laughs. In a desperate plan to stop the tickling, he gathered as much strength as he could and rolled onto his back so that he was facing upwards. With his hands now free to move about, Osamu quickly grabbed at Atsumu’s wrists and pushed them away from his quivering belly.

While his twin was catching his breath, Atsumu looked down upon him with a wicked grin. He easily shook his wrists out of Osamu’s weak hold and in turn grabbed onto his brother’s hands, pulling them slightly off to the sides. “Thanks for the help, Samu. I was wondering how I was gonna get ya to turn over. Now I have all the room I need to do this…”

Osamu’s eyes quickly darted towards Atsumu just in time to see him start to slowly lower his head towards Osamu’s bare and unguarded stomach. From far too many ticklish experiences, he instantly knew what Atsumu’s intentions were, and he mentally cursed himself making the situation ten times worse by revealing his belly. The only choice he had now was to plead and pray that his brother would give him mercy. Hopefully the universe was on his side today. “NO! Nohot that, anythihing but that! Tsumu plehehease!!”

Unfortunately, the universe didn’t offer much help. As Atsumu’s head grew closer and closer, Osamu sucked in his belly as much as he could, knowing that he was only momentarily preventing the inevitable.

The moment Atsumu’s lips met his sensitive skin and blew the dreaded raspberry, Osamu howled with laughter. He could feel his muscles jiggling around from the vibrations, tickling him both inside and out. He tried to curl up and yank his hands out of his brother’s strong grasp, but it was all in vain. “NAHAHAHAHAHA!! STAHAHAHAHAP! TSUHUHUHUHUHUMU STAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!”

The blonde lifted his head for a quick breath. “Ya know what I wanna hear, Samu!” Atsumu exclaimed before pressing his lips back down into Osamu’s belly. When his brother’s back arched and he felt knees begin to bump into his back, Atsumu chuckled fondly into Osamu’s stomach, only intensifying the ticklish sensations.

Tears of joy started to gather around the corners of Osamu’s eyes. When he felt Atsumu’s mouth move closer to his belly button, he desperately called out, “PLEHEHEHEASE, NOHOHOHO MOHOHOHOHORE!! YOHOHOHOHOU GOHOHOHOHOT MEHEHEHE!!”

After finishing off with one more short raspberry to his brother’s side, Atsumu pulled back and released Osamu’s hands. He watched fondly as Osamu quickly wrapped his arms around his torso with a flushed face and giggles unconsciously pouring out of his beaming smile. Atsumu’s face broke out into a smile of its own at the sight of his twin looking much happier than he had been not even thirty minutes ago. “Ya okay there, Samu? Or has it been so long since we’ve played that ya can’t take it anymore?”

Osamu rested his head against the floor, eyes closed and smiling wide. “Ohoho, I am soho gonna getcha,” he playfully threatened, a trace of the need for revenge in his voice.

a/n: thanks sm for reading !! finally branched myself out into the haikyuu fandom so that’s fun :D but is it just me or does the inarizaki team have a total of like two tickle fics T-T maybe there just isn’t an audience for it?? y’all will have to lmk

#haikyuu #haikyuu tickle #atsumu #miya atsumu #tsumu #osamu #miya osamu #samu #ler!atsumu #lee!osamu #ticklish!osamu #miya twins #platonic #tickling #tickle fic

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strawberri-blonde · 3 years

Text

Insecurities - George Weasley

Summary: George gets insecure over Fred and your’s relationship. (Boys are allowed to have feelings too)

Warnings: Angst, and fluff

George watched from afar with his face against the palm of his hand as he saw you and Hermione along with other girls from Gryffindor squeal with glee as his twin pulled a rose from your ear. You didn’t even like roses. They reminded you of funerals. Shaking away his thoughts, the older twin grabbed his books off the table and started towards the door that lead out the Gryffindor common room. “George?” Hearing your voice, the boy haulted in movement but decided to act like he didn’t hear you. “George?” You raced after him with the white rose in hand tugging onto his sleeve. Reluctantly, the boy stopped and turned to face you and once he saw your sweet smile it was hard for the Weasley to be upset. “Why didn’t you wait for me?” With his free hand that wasn’t occupied with books, it went straight towards your waist while you hands gripped onto his biceps.

“I’m sorry, love. You just seemed to busy with Fred and I didn’t want to disturb you.” It wasn’t much of a lie and luckily you fell for it.

You rolled your eyes and pulled onto his tie to bring his lips closer to yours. The kiss didn’t last long but it satisfied both of your needs for now. “I’m never to busy for you.” You pulled away from him and looked at the Rose in disgust. “Plus you know how I feel about roses.” Your whole statement was true but it still didn’t help the insecurities that were running their George’s veins.

Offering you a fake smile to try and push through his feelings George brushed a peice of hair out of your hair towards behind your ear. “And that’s why I know you’re favorite is...” whispering the spell that he created for you, not Fred. The Weasley pulled a flower from your ear. “A lily.” A yelp escaped from you mouth as you handed the rose to a random girl walking by and clenched the white lily close towards your chest.

“Merlin, I love you.” You kissed the Weasley again this time with more aggression. You both moaned into the kiss when a familiar voice broke you up.

“I feel like I should wear protection from just watching this.” The both of you pulled away when you heard Fred’s obnoxious laugh.

“Shut up, Fred.” You rolled your eyes while George sneared at his brother.

“Aw I’m just playing with you love birds.” The other Weasley twin wrapped his arm around your shoulder then George’s. “Did you tell him?” You shook your head while your boyfriends eyes furrowed.

“Tell me what?” George pushed off his brothers arm to look at you both. Fred was smiling along with you.

“I need help with Astronomy and no one is as good as our girl Y/n here.”

“My girl.” George argued by grabbing onto your hands pulling them towards his chest, getting you away from his brother.

“Yeah,” Fred agreed by dropping his hands in his pockets. “So she’s helping me studying tonight because she knows mum will have my head if I fail that class.”

“Why can’t I help you?” Fred and you both laughed at his question.

“Because babe the two of you together will end up with the two of you creating some kind of bomb and not actually work.” You kissed his cheek and walked over to Fred who grabbed your wrist and started to pull you towards the library. “I’ll see you later, love. I love you.”

Lazily, George waved at you. “I love you too.” The older Weasley twin watched as Fred let go of your wrist and pulled you in his chest and squeezed your shoulder mighty tight. They’re just friends. The boy had to say over and over again trying to kill the demons within.

After the first study session, George has notice how closer you and Fred have gotten and his insecurities grew. He couldn’t help but focus on the small touches of the arm or the hidden laughs. The Weasley knew he was crazy to think that maybe the two most important people in his life could betray him but if Hogwarts has taught George anything. It is that anything is possible.

George was getting frustrated as the time passed. The Weasley was waiting on you and his brother but neither of you have shown. The boy clenched his knuckles before sitting up from his chair to head towards the boys wing; but right as his posture straightened he heard your infamous giggle. In a quick fashion, George turned towards the entrance of Gryffindor’s common room to see you and his brother stumbling in filling the room with laughter. “Where were you?” His voice was stone cold making you straighten your posture while Fred continued to laugh.

“I’m sorry, love, but Fred and I-”

“Excalty.” George snapped filling his frustrations spill from his mouth. “You and Fred. Fred and Y/n. What about George and Y/n hmm. Ever think of actually spending time with your boyfriend.” You furrowed your eyebrows not realizing that he was feeling this way.

“George-”

“Bloke,” Fred cut you offf by walked in front of you to pat his brother on the shoulder. “You seriously need to get a grip.” Wrong move, because George pushed Fred resulting in Fred pushing him back and before anything could get worse. You ran over and gripped George’s biceps and in return he cupped your cheeks but then he saw the bruise on the base on your neck. All of the color disappeared from his face and it scared you.

“Love.”

“Where did that bruise come from?” Stepping back you clasped the wound and turned fo Fred. ”That’s what I thought.”

Your eyes widen at his words. “George no it’s not like that.”

“George, I’m your brother. I would never do anything to Y/n.” The Weasley didn’t listen to any of you as he walked past the both of you straight into Fred and his shared room. When you reached for the knob it wouldn’t open.

“Please, George. I love you with everything in me. You’re my my whole world.” Fred tried a spell to open the door but it wouldn’t budge. Letting out a sigh, you leaned against the door with dispair just wanting your man to know the truth. Fred walked over towards the adjacent wall and hit his hand against it before looking down at you.

“This is all my fault. I’ve should’ve known he was feeling like this.” You instantly shook your head.

“It’s both of ours.” The both of you had frowns and tears ready to linger. “Go to Angela. I’ve got this.” Fred let out a sigh and reached down for your hand to which you grabbed and the Weasley boy pulled you into his arms. “Don’t worry, Freddie. I think I can fix this.” Fred relaxed some into your arms, before pulling away to walk down the hall and out the west wing to go towards his new girlfriends dorm room.

Turning towards the wooden door, you pressed your knuckles against it before knocking. “George, please open the door.” Silence still lingered from the other side of the door. “I can show you what happened. I know a spell. You know Fred and I wouldn’t hurt you like that.” You took a deep breath before saying. “Love, I’d rather kill myself.” For a split of a second you thought you heard something shuffling around. Then you heard the noise once more and the sound of George’s voice. He was disarming his protection spell.

You stepped back and couldn’t help but let out a whimper when George opened the door because he still had wet tears on his rosy cheeks. In instinct, you reached up to wipe them, but he rose his arms to stop you. “Just show me.” His harsh words hurt, but you picked up your wand and pressed the tip towards your temporal lobe and whisper a spell. George watched as a elctirc blue mist sprung from your brain and hovered on the tip of your wand. As you brought the wand closer towards his forehead you looked into his eyes for reassurance that he was okay with it and George gave you a slight nod in agreement. Nodding your head in return, you pressed the tip of your wand against his forehead and watched as his eyes flashed a light blue.

—

You sat down in the wooden chair that resigned in the library as you watched Fred stand above you. “I think you’ve probably one of the most beautiful girls I’ve ever seen.” You smiled up at him as he twirled the poem book into his hands. “And I was wondering if you’d like to be my girl?” Furrowing you’re eyebrows you kept the smile that lingered even though Fred had broken the sentence up so awkwardly. The Weasley noticed your face and let out a sigh. “I don’t know why I get so weird.” Fred swung the book down towards his side as he continued. “I’m so confident but when it comes to my feelings...”

“You’re rubbish.” You added in resulting in the boy to narrow his eyes.

“Thanks for the notice.” You couldn’t help but laugh making Fred push you slightly. You shoved him off before continuing. “Now if you want to go out with Angela so bad you’re going to have to listen to me or ask for George’s advice.” Fred widen his eyes in terror.

“Oh blimey, I’d rather ask Neville.” You suppressed your laughter by holding a straight face but nodded in agreement.

“Yeah, I love him but if I didn’t make the first move, he’d still be lurking from a distance.” Letting a smirk make its way into your face you remembered your first date. “But he does have some moves. Like the flower trick.” Fred nodded sheepishly thinking of at the time he saw George pull that Lilly from your ear. “He invented that all on his own.”

The twin nodded his head. “And when I use it, the ladies love it.” Again you rolled your eyes and closed your book that resigned on the wooden table.

“Just do as I say and give that book of poems to Angela, she likes that muggle arthur.” Fred nodded his head turning around then brought the book up to his face and read the cover again. As he was distracted by the book, he didn’t notice that you stood up from your seat and turned your direction slamming the spine of the book against your neck.

From the pressure of it, your breath was taken from your lungs and you wrapped your hands around your neck while Fred dramatically dropped the book and gripped your biceps in comfort. However, you didn’t want to be touched seeing as you still couldn’t breathe, and pulled away from his grip and took in a staggered breath. “Y/n?” You heart thumped loudly against your chest as Fred took you into his arms again. “Bloody hell, I’m so sorry.”

Hearing the disparity, you coughed a few times then shook your head. “We don’t tell George about this.” You gently rubbed over your wound as Fred kneaded you’re back. “He’ll kill you.”

George let out a gasp as the memory faded. His heart raced in his chest like yours had earlier and his neck tingled in pain. However, his throat clenched and tears formed as his mind had those horrible thoughts again. How could he be so stupid. “Love.” Relief washed over your features and you rushed into his arms, letting the boy cry into you shoulder while you cried into his chest. “I’m so sorry Y/n.” You held onto him pushing at him some, guiding your bodies onto his red sheets. Once George had sat down you sat beside him and planted your legs into his lap and cupped his face to brush off his tears. “Love, I’m so sorry.” You let him repeat his apologies a few more times before you kissed his forehead and then his lips to silent his cries.

“Don’t feel sorry, Georgie. You’re allowed to get insecure,” you kissed him again. “But it’s important that you don’t hold it in again.” Looking into each other eyes you continued. “Do you understand?” The Weasley didn’t respond so you pressed the issue. “George, do you understand?” Swiping away the rest of his tears, George nodded his head then placed a hand onto your thigh and one behind your back. Taking your time you smoothed out his long apricot locks, getting the loose strays away from his hazel eyes. Your touched soothed the boy calming his nerves.

“I love you.” You smiled at his words and leaned in to steal one more kiss.

“I love you more.” Your foreheads leaned on one another as you both forgot about the world. Pulling at the roots, you pressed your lips onto his hairline and stood up to change into one of his sweatshirts. “Now let’s get some rest because tomorrow we’re going to have a Georgie and Y/n/n day.” The Weasley smiled at your words and stood up to help fix the sweatshirt that kept wanting to fall off your shoulder.

“I’d like that.” You smiled up at him and stood on your tippy toes and when you looked up, the red mark on your neck ached. George’s eyes filled with sorrow and he kissed the wound making your breath hitch in pleasure. “You were right about one thing?” Raising your eyebrows in response, the Weasley twin continued. “I’m going to kill Fred.”

#george weasley #george weasley x y/n #george weasley x reader #hogwarts imagine #fred weasley x reader #fred weasley #weasley twins #george weasley imagine

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mxvladdy · 3 years

Note

heyy i just read your fic Case of the Munchies on ao3 and im Loving it!!!! its amazing!! i was wonder if youre accepting requests and if you haven’t done it could you write the same for the rest: mammon, levi, satan, belphi, dia, barbatos and smth for simeon and luke (ofc platonic) like how angles have a true form and that means they can never relax around mc and how solomon has so much power at his fingertips he can just snap and end them or smth like that? pretty please and thank you!!!!

A/N: Of Course! Of Course! I already did Mammon and Levi HERE so I’ll do the other four in this request! You sent me a lot of good ideas and I’ll sprinkle them out into other requests soon!

Hope you like it!!

Case of the Munchies prt 3!

Word Count: 4.2k

Characters: Satan, Belphie, Diavolo, Barbatos

TW: Mentions of eating and cook humans, very mild gore

Satan

As the only full-blooded demon of the seven, he has thought about it...just hypothetically of course. When you were new to the Devildom he did find your scent more appetizing than the others. It’s a good thing he has the most restraint and control of all his kin, especially when it comes to his more base urges.

He doesn’t hide this knowledge from you. It’s readily available in the library and his own room in the history books. He just won’t bring it up. So if you don’t say anything, he won’t either. What would he say anyway? “Yes, I’ve thought about it, up until it was outlawed it was a staple of our diet after all…” Ye, probably not the best thing to say.

When you finally brought it up he was exasperated. Did you have to bring it up during the few hours he had alone with himself? He wasn’t going to lie but the thought of hurting your feelings would just about do him in.

He will alleviate your worries if you have any. If Satan was anything, he was genuine.

Mini Fic

His wine curdles in his stomach, turning sour along with the take-out he had nabbed for the two of you to enjoy tonight. Drinks and dinner were becoming a staple in your T.V. night tradition. If one of you had had a rough day you would drop by your favorite shop of the hour and pick up a meal to share while you vent.

Today in particular had been a shit day for him. Failed experiment after failed experiment, and one bottle that didn’t explode on impact with the potion he dropped. Sigh. At least your comforting words soothed his wounded pride a little. You chuckle at his escapades glad to see he is not hurt at least. It was nice to have someone to see the humor in something that normally would have dampened his mood.

“You’re a pest.” He laughs at you while snapping his takeout chopsticks in half to use. “I need sympathy-hours of work wasted.” You snort into your own bowl of udon.

“You need words of praise like Beel needs another stomach.” Satan gasps in mock insult pointing a sauce stained chopstick at you.

“How dare you insult your host! After I toiled over this meal of-” What did he get exactly? Honestly, when he placed the order he was near boiling with rage at his careless fumble. It was to be a surprise for you, something to give you a bit of magic while supervised by himself. He knew how frustrated you were with your lack of magical ability in class so he wanted to gift you something grand. Now he has to wait months to try again.

Ah, well...nothing ventured nothing gained as they say.

You watch him sulk over his soup dumplings, his mile away from the comfort of your company and his room. “Come on blondie.” You poke him with your foot before burying them under his pajama-clad thighs on the couch. “Eat your ‘hard earned’ meal before I do.” You snatch up his D.D.D forgetting your own food for a moment to set up your favorite streaming service to cast to his small T.V. “Want to watch a bunch of humans fail miserably at baking?”

"I thought you would never ask."

Satan feels you stiffen in his arms two hours into your bake-off marathon. Your takeout boxes are cold and forgotten on his coffee table, a bottle of wine gone between the two of you. He glances down at you curious.

You were transfixed on the screen. The novice baker on screen was struggling to keep his monstrosity of a cake upright. It was the annual Halloween episode and this fool went for a Silence of the Lambs inspired cake. A good concept really, but very poorly executed. The fake body parts and sugar blood weighted the pastry down dangerously. If he were, to be frank, the cake was also tacky as hell. Heh, he'd have to try to make this for Lucifer.

"Does his abuse of the piping gun offend you that much?" He jokes wrapping an arm around you.

Your laugh is breathy and lacks its usual warmth. "It is excessive isn't it?" You look up at him. "Hey, Satan-have you ever eaten people before?"

"Uhh…" Great, how eloquent. This came out of nowhere, did Lucifer set you up to this? No-no you wouldn’t. Would you hate him if you knew? “I have.” He admits through clenched teeth waiting for your reaction.

“Didn’t Diavolo ban it?” He can tell you are doing the mental math in your head.

He chuckles dryly. “Well, you never asked if I did it legally.” You move away from his touch and pause the show. “I mean...I did it legally! ” His mouth runs freely, his brain screaming at him to shut up.

“Satan.” You cross your arms unimpressed.

“It was a new law and I never meant to eat it for the most part. It was at a time where I was still struggling to control myself.” Young and stupid as Lucifer had said defending him every step of the way when he would slip up. Was it sold on the black market now? Yes. Did he know how to get it? Sure, but he would never nor would he tell you about it either.

You nod thinking about his words. “I can empathize.” Oh, thank the Devil. “Have you thought of eating me?”Ahhh. “Oh my God, you have.” You chuck a pillow at him with a laugh.

He catches the pillow and clutches it to his fiery hot face. “Everyone did at first!” If he was going down then he was going to take every one of his brothers down with him. “I wasn’t going to act on it! It was a spur of the moment-why are you laughing!”

“Sorry, sorry.” You wipe at the tears in your eyes wishing you had your phone to take a picture of his blushing face. “I kind of figured you did.”

Satan looks at you incredulously. “Shouldn’t you be a bit more torn up over this?”

You shrug. “After everything we’ve been through? I admit it was a shock to think at first but I mean, you would have done it by now right?”

“Well, thank you?” He flops back on the couch, still clutching the pillow to act as a barrier between you two. He’ll take it as a compliment.

You scoot close, nudging his knee with yours. “You ok?” He nods. “Can I touch you?” He nods again eagerly. You wrap your arms around his shoulders and squeeze. “Sorry, I made you uncomfortable.”

Satan chuckled, dropping the pillow to hug you back. “It’s ok.” He peaks your forehead. “Now, with that out of the way. Shall we finish this?” He swipes up his phone to hit play. You nod, flinging your legs over him to snuggle closer. “Good, I’m dying to know how he tries to save that thing. I’m putting money on icing.”

“You know.” You break the silence once more, unable to stop yourself. “I wouldn’t be opposed to being eaten...in some ways.”

Belphegor

After your first *ahem* encounter, he doesn’t bring up the whole food thing. He is afraid that if you learned about it, it would be the last strike for you and his relationship. Perhaps it’s paranoia on his part but better safe than sorry.

In all honesty, he didn’t eat it that much anyway. Killing humans was something he did often in his youth as a demon. A stupid attempt at revenge on his part. It filled the holes in his hearts to hurt those he believed killed his sister.

But to eat their flesh? Disgusting. He tried it a few times and it turned his stomach with every mouthful. He just hated them too much to even stomach them. He’s mellowed out with time but still never got a taste for it.

When you asked it was a shock but welcomed in a way. Like he could finally get this weight off his shoulders every time he looked at you.

Mini Fic

“It’s gross.” Belphie yawns, jumping up to sit on the high garden wall. He bends down to help you up placing you gently next to himself. The wind catches you by surprise threatening to topple you back from the wall before he rights you. He tosses his sweater over you with a nod of satisfaction.

You snuggle into the fleece lining burying your nose into the fabric. It smelled of elderberries and honeysuckles. Belphie watches you curl up into his side with a fond smile. “Seriously, you all are nasty.”

“Ouch!” You push his shoulder with a grin. “I feel like I should be offended on behalf of all humans.”

Belphie snorts, looking up into the bright colors of the night sky. “Good. Be offended. You, humans, are slimy.” You squawk indignantly. “It’s true, never in all my years would I willingly ingest it.” He shudders theatrically.

“Rude.”

“Shouldn’t you be happy? Lest I eat you?” He growls playfully, taking a swipe at you. He pulls you close to kiss the pout off your face. He stops only when your face is hot and your smile threatens to pull a muscle. “I’ll keep you safe, always.” He vows resting his chin on your head.

“Do you think other demons would try to eat me?”

“Have you met my twin?” He teases. He takes your jab to his ribs with a smile. “But if one of those lesser demons even tries to breathe in your direction I’ll kill them.”

“Ok, Mister sleeps till dinner.” You joke. His vow warms your heart a little, chasing away the small bit of fear that had rested itself in your chest. You saw how some demons looked at you at R.A.D, the longing and hungry looks got to be a bit much sometimes. A few older demons would discuss it loudly when they knew you were close by. Apparently, it was a long standing tradition of demons eating humans both body and soul when a pact was concluded.

Imagine what those brothers would do to them…

You shake your head hugging Belphie closer. You had nothing but his word that he would keep you safe, yet that was enough for you. Besides, he wasn’t one to follow the rules even at the best of times.

“I’m serious. You're off limits for everyone.”

You nod into his shirt, closing your eyes to enjoy the peace of the moment. “I’ll hold you to it.”

Diavolo

It is so far from his mind that when you say something it is like a rug was taken out from under him. He could be diplomatic about it, but you deserve better than a half-truth.

He was a wild child in his youth. Sometimes he would overindulge in his father’s heritage and gorge himself on his newfound powers and privilege. He would dine with the elders and eat with abandon under their proud eyes.

He regrets it now, in your company it brings up a slurry of emotions. Sometimes when he looks at you he sees flashes of his past behavior.

The urge is stronger in him than the brothers, a constant nagging tug in his guts, but he is strong. Stronger both in willpower and sheer physical prowess than them so the pull is more of an annoyance than a burning need. He can temper the hunger in other ways if need be *wink*

He fears what you might think of him if you ever found out the truth, but however you take it he will handle it in stride. He loves you too much not to.

Mini Fic

Dinners, when Diavolo could eat alone, were a rare and special treat. The solace of just being allowed to exist without constantly checking his posture or presentation was a blessing, just him, his thoughts, and a good meal. It was nice to have no paperwork to worry about staining this time or a tedious meeting where he couldn’t savor his meal. No, no this was good. He looks down at his heavily laden plate and smiles. Well, almost… Pulling out his phone he snaps a quick picture and sends it to you with a simple question. Join me?

Private meals were wonderful, but with you, they were perfect.

You arrive faster than he expected, flushed face and clutching a stitch in your side from rushing over. He almost felt bad before he saw the eager look in your eyes. Barbatos helps you with your school bags and coat before placing another plate of food across from the young lord. He winks at the prince before disappearing back through the door.

“Thank you for the invite!” You beam taking your seat across from him. “I hope you don’t mind that I'm not dressed for the occasion. I was just wrapping up a study session with the boys.” You look down at your rumpled lounge clothes.

Diavolo waved his hand disregarding your concerns. “I would emulate you if I had the time.” He looks at his own pressed school uniform. He had another meeting this evening, much to his distaste. “You look rather comfortable.” You smile in delight before tucking into your own plate.

You eat in a comfortable silence reading the room well enough to tell that he wished for some company but not needless chitter-chatter. Barbatos arrived moments after you put your fork down and left with the plate leaving behind a delicious smelling hot drink. You couldn’t put your finger on the flavor but it tastes spicy like cinnamon and coats your throat like warm honey.

Whatever was in the drink seemed to work some magic on the prince. His shoulder droop, his back sinking into the chair as his legs stretch out till they are close to brushing against yours. He starts talking over the drink, eyes slowly lighting up with delight. You drink, nodding along with him as he builds up steam. It was nice to see him so unguarded and light. You listen to him talk about simple innocent topics. You knew how he tried to have these conversations with the others to no avail. The brother’s always tried to stay clear of him, and Lucifer simply dismissed these things most days. Barbatos and the angels were a bit better but still listened mostly to placate him.

“Ah!” Diavolo stops mid-sentence as his door opens once more Barbatos holding a small platter in his gloved hand. Dia claps his hands in delight. “I’ve been wanting to have you try this with me for forever. The human palate is so different, but I hope this is tasty.”

“What is it?” You eye the covered plate curiously.

Dia says a word in infernal. It is harsh and guttural in his throat but his delight was evident in his tone. “It is like...a roasted nut? Sorry, it is difficult to explain but it has been a favorite treat of mine since I was a boy. I hope you like it too.” He opens the lid with little ceremony and tilts the bowl to you. Inside were several golfball sized pods piled on top of each other. Even from across the table you could feel the molten heat radiating from the porous black shell. It looked...ugly. Like a hunk of dried lava. You eye it suspiciously as Diavolo picks one up with his bare hands and bits it. The shell cracks under his sharp teeth, a fang catching in a weak spot with a noise that makes you shiver. Underneath the thick casing, you could see a dark red and fleshy core. He hums in delight pulling put the meat of the seed and discard the shell pieces onto an empty plate. He makes quick work of the innards already reaching for another by the time you casually pick up a seed.

The seed itself was dense and warm to the touch. You squeeze it, noting that the porous coating felt like a mass of steel in your hand. “Dia-how do I open it?” No way you could bite it, not without breaking your jaw in the process.

“Allow me.” He takes it from you and effortlessly cracks it. “It is a tradition to break them with teeth, instead of hands or utensils. Something about a show of strength. I just find it fun.” He shrugs, handing you the broken seed.

“Fun!” You marvel at his pearly fangs. “Those are some big chompers.”

“All the better to eat you with my dear.” He chuckles.

You blink in shock, eyes widening. “Would you? Eat me?”

Diavolo’s smile drops. “No.” He lies on reflex, his political nature kicking in. “No-no wait.” He shakes his head. “I...at a time would have without hesitation.” He feels you recoil. “It was common practice back in the day. To the common demon it was a great meal and for the ruling class a show. He looks down at the broken fragments of shell on his plate. Breaking the shell was far too reminiscent of other things. He squashes the unwanted wave of memories coming up. Instead, he looks up at you.

You sit quietly mulling over his words. You haven’t run yet. “Why did you stop?”

He leans back with a loud exhale. Why did he stop? There were many reasons, none he wished to divulge into at the moment, but he had to say something. “I grew up, and began to resent and regret it.” He used to read human stories of demons and his kind. They hurt their characterizations of him and his people. Yet, they had all been scarily accurate. He wanted to prove that they weren’t stagnating beasts, slaves to their desires. Even if it wasn't a popular opinion.

“I see.” You pick up the seed again. “Thank you for telling me. You didn’t have to.”

“But I wanted to, and to apologize… such admissions must have ruined your appetite. If you wish to retire-”

“Is it weird if it didn’t?” You cut him off. You felt-not apathetic to the knowledge but close to it. It confirmed a lot of things for you and put certain things in perspective. You still felt safe with him even with this new bit of knowledge. Without a second thought, you pop the treat into your mouth. You gasp in delight. The flavor and texture were not what you were expecting, but was delicious all the same. “Can you open another for me?” You push your plate over to him.

“Of course!”

The food was as wonderful as his company.

Barbatos

You knew he cooked it. He probably knows a million different ways to prepare a human. He is also very blunt about his dabblings in the market.

He doesn’t eat it, hasn’t ever. He sees no reason to, especially since he doesn’t need to eat anyway there is no temptation. He did find the meals he created beautiful though.

Once he lived for the praises of the courts and his young lord. He was a master at all mediums he cared to work with. Time, decorum, or of the flesh.

He is 100% unashamed of his past with the dark side of the Devildom’s history. In fact, he is damn near proud of it. He is a demon and it was a part of his life, if that frightens you, well there is nothing he can do about it.

He’ll entertain your questions and will try to put any lingering worries at ease. Just don’t expect to be coddled when he does.

Mini Fic

Barbatos had very few personal pleasures in his life. His schedule simply didn’t have the space for such things. So why even bother looking for a pastime. It wasn’t until Diavolo gifted him with an old worn cookbook did he find it.

Cooking was a necessity for his prince, but with that little book, it became something he looked forward to doing. Slowly, he began to seek them out, filling his growing quarters with cookbooks and loose-leaf slips of paper. He enjoys reading them. Each book was a little time capsule into the cook's life and memories. Could a mix of spices really remind someone of the arid heat of their motherland? Or does following a certain way of aging meat really honor the writer's late grandfather’s memory? He tries them all, each recipe a little invasion to a happier time.

He wrote his fair share of cookbooks too in his day. Simple modifications to things the young lord liked to the odd machinations of his own imagination. He got good at experimenting with flavors and textures over the years, mastering certain cooking techniques and flavors just for fun. He didn’t share many of them, a lot of his recipes were just too complicated for most. Luke was allowed to look at his pastry books only. The little cherub was enamored with his techniques and wanted to learn as much as he could in the short amount of time he was in the Devildom. Admirable, but he made sure to keep some of his...less savory books away from the boy. He shudders to think what Simeon would do if he scarred the young angel.

You are the only one who has full access to his collections. Whether you liked to cook was inconsequential to him. He simply enjoyed sharing this interest with you. Some nights you would take it upon yourself to be his “sous-chef”. Which meant you sat in the corner of the kitchen and read out the ingredients and steps for a recipe he knew by heart. Sometimes you would add in extra steps in an attempt to stump it. Cute...but ultimately failed each time. So, most nights when you tagged along to the kitchens you just flip through his collection, reading his immaculate scribblings crammed into the corners of the pages or where he scratched out certain ingredients for more demon-appropriate foods and more sustainable options.

You had gone through many beautiful books before you found it. The cookbook was small and inconspicuous compared to most. Just a simple black cover with a well-worn spine. What made you take notice of it was just how dusty it was. That wasn’t like him to do. Barbatos would never let something get so dirty. You wished you never had opened it. You weren’t stupid by any means, but after reading a few pretty graphic recipes it had unsettled you. So you withdrew from Barbatos trying to forget about the book tucked away deep in the bowels of your school bag.

“You’ve been distant.” You choke, hand flying up to your chest as you swear your heart skipped a beat. Damn demon. Should put a bell on him. “What’s wrong?” His eyes are piercing, cutting away at your feeble defenses.

“Nothing…” You fiddle with your bag’s strap. Your eyes drop to the floor taking in the differences between his polished shoes and your scuffed boots.

“Of course not…” You could hear the skepticism in his voice. “I trust that if there was something wrong you would feel safe enough to confide in me.” His words hit like a ton of bricks on your shoulders. He sighs seeing that his words got no reaction. “Please?”

Wordlessly you rummage in your bag and thrust the book into his chest. “Sorry. It shook me up more than I thought it would.”

Ah. He knew this book all too well. For a time it had been his favorite, one to pull out with Diavolo had guests or a deal that needed to be sealed. He accepts the book, noting how much your hands shook. “I understand.” He slips the book into his breast pocket making a mental note to hide it in one of his lesser used rooms. “Would you like to discuss this? In my room perhaps?” You follow with a timid nod.

“Where shall we begin?” Barbatos asks the moment he closes the door to his room.

“You don’t seem perturbed.” You frown. Barbatos shrugs, pulling the book out and opening it. He had a lot of good memories stored here. Some of these were still considered signature dishes, oftentimes a visiting dignitary would lament to him about the good old days when he could show off his craft when flesh was plentiful. He takes pride in that still to this day even. For as much as he loved you, he would not be ashamed of this.

“I didn’t mean it like that.” You shake your head when he says as much. “It just confused me. Do-do you see me as food?”

“I never saw humans as food, no more than I see demons or angels as it.” He picks at an imaginary bit of lent from his pant leg. “As for seeing you as food no. No matter how sweet your lips are, or how honeyed your words can be.” He smiles, taking impish delight in your squirming. “I merely did my job as a butler for my lord.”

“Oh- sorry for not coming to you sooner.” You felt foolish now. Barbatos waves it off, pleased to have this issue put aside so quickly and cleanly. “Wait-" You gasp as his words finally sink in. “Have you prepared angels before?”

He flashes you a mischievous smile putting a single finger up to his lips. “Perhaps~ do you wish to read that too?”

#obey me #om satan #om belphegor #om diavolo #om barbatos #fun request!

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heliosthegriffin · 3 years

Text

Jaune of the Dead II

-------------- Two Hours earlier ------------

“C’mon Rubes, you can’t depressed all day just because you’re imaginary boyfriend ghosted you.” Yang said playfully to Ruby.

“He’s not imaginary! He’s taller than dad, blonde, and wears a white trench-coat, I keep telling you this! That the mean Schnee made me blow up, and then he showed up did a glowy thing, and I felt great! Then walked me to the place, and then disappeared like a ghost! Then I found out he supercharged my aura! How do think I could have done so well in Initiation!” Ruby said to her sister rapid-fire.

A tall redhead puts her hand on Ruby’s shoulder. “You shouldn’t sell yourself so short Ruby, accepting your successes is necessary for good mental health, and from what I saw was enough to put some huntsmen to shame.”

Ruby pouts. “Yeah, I know! The thing is I can’t one shot a Nevermore and fly on my own! The thing is I know how strong I am, and I am not strong enough to do those on my own!”

Yang and Pyrrha sigh.

“Ruby, c’mon you’re awesome! You’re talented and you’re strong, so stop selling yourself short, wait never-mind that does apply to you.” Yang said with a shit-eating grin.

Ruby’s face was a brilliant red as she started pounding weakly against Yang’s arms. “Yannng! I drink milk, I’ll be tall one day!”

“If you say so, Rosebud.”

Pyrrha watched the exchange with a amused smile, feeling very pleased with her team so far.

She hadn’t expected to partner up with a prodigy and her sister, but destiny was full of twists and turns.

Many, many twists, like Yang’s partner and the leader of team BYRN.

Bleiss Schnee.

The notorious Black Sheep of the Schnee household and disowned daughter of Jacque Schnee for reason’s kept private, though considering what she heard of the man in the day she has known Bleiss, it didn’t paint flattering picture why he did what he did.

Who disowned their child based on appearance?

*BZZZ-BZZZ-BZZZZ*

*SNORE-SNORE*

The Black Sheep slept noisily in a dark corner of the room with her limbs thrown all across the bed as she slept under neath a black canopy bed with... her toys all still vibrating under her sheets.

A series of black glyphs floated menacingly around her bed as she slept.

Thankfully the curtains on the side of canopy bed only showed a hazy figure behind the curtains.

Bleiss had made her team go out last night to celebrate making it through initiation. They had gone to club after club, well Yang and her did, Pyrrha and Ruby left not feeling comfortable on that scene.

Yang had come back to the dorm alone, as Bleiss wanted to find someone to ‘Break her in half while folding her legs over her head,” or to find “A soft little sub to break between her legs.”

Bleiss had somehow come back empty-handed and frustrated.

Then she brought out the toys.

It had been hours before she went to sleep.

She had no idea how Ruby slept through it all, especially Yang screaming bloody murder trying to break her glyphs, which when broken unleashed somesort of insect like grimm that stung Yang without mercy.

Pyrrha was one-hundred percent sure that she started moaning louder to annoy Yang.

Thankfully, Ruby seemed to know what was going on. Apparently having walked in on Yang in a private moment before, but she still blushed red at noticing what her leader was doing calling it ‘Filthy.’

Pyrrha was also sure that it was a fools errand to try and wake her up for class. Bleiss had struck her as the type to have a couple trips up her sleeve. It did make Pyrrha ponder why she needed defenses why she slept though, but following those paths of thought those only led to dark explanations. Bleiss might make it clear one day if they grew close, and maybe, hopefully, it would have a more happy origin.

Bleiss had also made clear as leader of Team BYRN, she would go to class when she damn well felt like it. She had pointed out a loophole in the Beacon Rule book, apparently she could skip class as long as she maintained a 90% average in her classes, she could not be dropped from the classes.

A rule that was normally reserved for 3rd and 4th years who often took missions and had spend time recovering and could not attend classes, so were normally given abridged lesson and makeup tests.

Pyrrha had no idea how she going to do it, but she’d try her best to support her leader.

Pyrrha looked back to her teammates, and hopefully friends.

Yang had gotten Ruby into a headlock and was rubbing her head with her knuckles.

“Ah! AH! AH! I yield, I yield!”

“Yeah, you do, who’s the big sister, I’m the big sister, woo-woo!”

Yang dropped Ruby to the ground, who then started pouting.

Then a look of realization hit her. “See that proves it!” Pyrrha raised a elegant brow towards Ruby. “Proves what?”

“That I didn’t do all that crazy awesome stuff at initiation on my own! If I could Yang wouldn’t be able to beat me up like that!”

Pyrrha gave it some thought she had a good point.

Yang flexed her arms. “I don’t though, maybe you’re just making it excuses.”

“Maybe you just a big head!”

Yang smirks at Ruby, and then cups her chest. “I got some big somethings!”

“Ah, Yang!”

Pyrrha shook her head at her teammates antics, then her internal clock told her they had around ten minutes before class started.

Pyrrha gently clapped her hands together, not loud enough to cause shock, but enough to gain attention.

“Ahem, I do believe we have classes soon.”

The sisters looked at each other and then started cleaning themselves up for class.

Ah, she could scarcely imagine the day becoming more interesting.

--- 10 minutes prior ---

Professor Port’s lesson was interesting if veiled behind misdirection. At first Pyrrha had considered that he might be a little self-absorbed, until she started listening closely. He was purposely distracting them with long-winded stories to test their observation skills, which if one actually paid attention to would start to reveal valuable information on Grimm.

Bleiss’s twin had also the same class period as them along with her team, SBRN, Saturn. It seemed Weiss went out of her way to ignore all of them expect Pyrrha, offering her hollow praise and empty compliments.

Pyrrha had politely decline her offer to take notes together. Her team seemed nice, but it was clear there was division among-st them.

Weiss then proved to be as superficial as Pyrrha thought, having clearly been taking notes but not understanding the subtext. Prof. Port had to step in once it was clear the Greater Borbatusk was too much for her, it’s armor plating across its back and head, remained unscratched till Prof. Port grabbed it by it’s tusk and flipped it, cutting it’s belly open.

“Well, children let this be a lesson to you all, that if nothing else remember you have room to grow! And to cut a Borbatusk across the belly! HO-Ho-ho!” Despite his cheery demeanor, Pyrrha couldn’t help but notice the glint of disappointment in his eyes.

Pyrrha wished she had imagined the pleased look in Weiss partner’s eyes at her failure, and her teammates apathy towards their leaders failure. What had she done to sow such discontent in her team?

The class was dismissed and they walked to their next class, a new one if rumors were true, one that had been set up merely a day ago before suddenly being added to their schedule.

What, a odd occurrence.

It was hosted by a new teacher too, one Pyrrha had never even heard of, or the seniors if the rumors where true. But, if the rumors were true, which they usually weren’t, he was the youngest teacher in Beacon history.

How exciting.

Pyrrha, Ruby, and Yang stood outside the door staring at Weiss with her teammates entering beside her.

“I see my sister is not coming to this class, either.”

“Nope.” Yang said popping the p.

Weiss gave them all a haughty look. “Fine by me, that noisy harlot is an annoyance anyway.” She gave Pyrrha a fake smile. “It’s not too late to make the best team in Beacon history,” She looked towards the sisters. “I don’t mind trading one of mind for her to join.”

Pyrrha felt a flash of anger inside her, that was mirrored on Yang’s face, but she quickly suppressed it. “I’m sorry, but,” She put a hand on Ruby’s shoulder, and gave Yang a winning smile. “I feel I’m already on Beacon’s best team.”

Weiss scowled and stomped into the classroom.

Yang simmered before tskking. “What’s her problem.”

“I sincerely have not idea.” Pyrrha actually did if one did consider what was heard about Jacque Schnee. But, best wait before jumping the gun.

“She’s shorter than me, she probably mad she doesn’t have enough milk.” Ruby said seriously.

A snorting laugh echoed out of Yang and Pyrrha.

Pyrrha wiped a tear out of her eye.

Yang laughed. “Yeah, I bet she doesn’t have enough milk!” Yang said giving Pyrrha a knowing nod.

“I’m glad you two understand the power of milk!” Ruby said going into the classroom.

Pyrrha and Yang followed in after Ruby, and where momentarily amazed by the interior of the classroom.

It was bigger on the inside, with shelves of books covering the walls, diagrams and maps covering the walls, not an inch of the room was bare. Where there were not diagrams and books, where glass-cases, and various objects, ranging from swords, glass shards, skeletons, and weird objects that Pyrrha couldn’t hope to identify.

This did not look like the work of a day or two, this room looked as though it had been used for years!

“Wow, impressive.” Yang said from beside her. Then she scowled. “Uh-oh, looks like we got trouble this period.” She said elbowing Pyrrha to get her attention to nod towards a group of people even Pyrrha had no tolerance for.

Team VMMP; Vampire.

Vernal Wennbar

Milita Malachite

Melanie Malachite

Neo Politan.

A team of thugs and low-lifers that had somehow managed to get into Beacon.

Who, unfortunately had real skill to back up their attitude.

Yang squinted her eyes. “Something is off about them tho,”

Pyrrha had to blink thought to make sure they were the same team, though.

They were so quiet, and actually dressed for class.

Was.. Was Vernal wearing makeup?

No, she must be imagining things.

Pyrrha decided to ignore them and go sit with Ruby, Yang following behind her.

Then they waited, the class deathly quiet.

Team VMMP unusually quiet had been more than enough to cow the others into silence.

6 minutes passed.

5 minutes passed.

4 minutes passed.

and soon it would be only one minute before class started.

Their teacher, who ever it might be, hadn’t appeared yet.

Then came the sound.

*Clack-Clack-Clack*

Of heavy shoes rhythmic hitting the floor.

It had started near the edge of their hearing, sounding as if it was coming from across the school. Only for it to grow louder and louder, becoming more noticeable till it was evident it was coming towards them.

10:00.

He entered exactly as the 9:59 went to 10:00, right on time.

A head of long, messy, blonde hair came through the doorway, the hair easily coming to his mid-back. His face sharp and judgmental, but looking handsome in a imperious way. Two deep blue bloodshot eyes scanned the room as he went in, underneath his eyes were deep black bags, that spoke of a lack of sleep.

His body language tense and wary, not that much of his body could be seen as hit was covered by a billowy white leather duster, which opened to reveal stained, faded, well worn, and stitched up work clothes and pair of heavy duty work boots.

A sheathed sword on his belt.

That’s not what drew Pyrrha’s attention to him though, no it was her semblance. He was wearing metal gauntlets too over his hands and had some sort of metal armor underneath his clothes or maybe worked into them.

He was also wearing five necklaces, had a dozen rings, and had nearly twenty pounds of things, Pyrrha couldn’t imagine what, stuffed into his pockets. And that was just metal! It wouldn’t surprise her if he had more in there made of other materials.

Why did he have all those things?

She then heard Ruby’s breath hitch. “That’s him!” Ruby whispered to her and Yang.

Before she cold react he spoke.

It was not what she expected.

It was quiet, very quiet, tired too, like he had just woken up. His voice was deep, but raspy like he had a cold. But it commanded attention and impossible to ignore as within its core was a razor thin edge of Power. Of something that made his voice make her her shiver and alert to him.

‘He is dangerous,’ Something insider her warned.

“My name is Jaune Arc, I am eighteen years old, and I will teach you all the in’s and out’s of advanced aura manipulation, Soul Theory, and defense against the Paranormal. Any questions?”

-----------------

9 years and 360 days ago

-----------------

Little Jaune Arc was on his own.

He didn’t get it.

He told his parents, but they laughed at him and told him everything was fine. There was no scary lady in his closet.

He told them again. They laughed again.

He told them everyday, but they weren’t laughing anymore, they were mad.

They said if he kept making up stories for attention they’d ground him.

When he asked if he could sleep in their room, they said he was a big boy and had to sleep in his room.

Jaune stopped talking to his parents on the fourth day. They hadn’t even gone into his room. It was like that with everyone though, no one seemed to believe him, or want to go near his room!

Alicia was out hunting and out of Scroll range.

He tried Saphron and his elder sisters, but they were too busy for him. Saphron was always talking to Terra. And told him to get more creative if he wanted attention from her. Terra just laughed at him.

June was always on her scroll, and told him to buzz off.

Daisy wanted to watch tv or to paint, and told him he was distracting her, or be a model for her.

Jazz would just turn her music up till he left, or drag him into dancing.

Grace would just make him work in the garden with her, but everything he said went in one ear and out the other.

And the Rachel?

She is too young, couldn’t even walk yet.

He vented to them anyway. That was a new phrase he learned. He also learned what a phrase was at school.

“I don’t get it,” He said to his youngest sibling. “they won’t take me seriously! I keep asking and asking them to just wait till a storm hits and stay with me, but they just keep laughing, getting mad, or ignoring me!”

Little Jaune Arc grabbed his hair with both hands.

“It’s so annoying! Why is this happening?”

Rachel just played with her toys, pretending to drive a car.

A glint appeared in Jaune’s eyes.

He started playing too.

He sighed though.

“What should I do, what should I do?” He repeated to himself.

“I tried to get them to look at the window, but they keep ignoring it, I tried showing them my scars and they said they were from playing in the woods, it’s like everything I say is just being ignored.”

Jaune rolled the toy car back and forth.

Rachel bumped her car into his, pinching Jaune’s finger inbetween the metal.

A light white glow appeared on his hand.

Jaune looked at his finger in wonder.

He focused on it and tried to force the feeling back out.

Nothing happened.

Jaune frowned and looked at his hand.

He grabbed a toy car and slammed at his pinky.

A warm feeling engulfed his pinky as a white light block the car, the car bouncing off of it.

He tried to imagine it being warm again.

A faint white light ghosted over his finger, before dying.

“Hmm,” He looked at his finger. “I have no idea what I just did,” He looked at Rachel. “but, you helped.” He gave Rachel a kiss on the forehead. “Thanks sis, I don’t know if you can understand me, but thanks anyway.”

Rachel looked at him with baby blues and gave a toothy smile and giggled.

“You want to keep playing?”

------------

An: Pyrrha’s more fun to write than I thought she would be. Next up though, on the fan fic list is Arc Acres, then Dead Knight, then Prodigy AU, then Sacred Rites II.

#Jaune of the Dead #Jaune Arc #Ruby Rose #Pyrrha Nikos #Yang Xiao-Long

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mirandalinotto · 3 years

Text

Why I hate the CAOS video essay that came out a week ago

Did anyone else get extremely angry at the way Friendly Space Ninja discussed all of the female characters in CAOS? like, don't get me wrong... I understand most of the points he's making, and agree with a lot of what he says in the video essay (Chilling Adventures of Sabrina: A Frustrating Waste of Potential), but when he speaks about Zelda, Lilith, Prudence, and Rosalind, I don't know... i just get a bad vibe. It's like he's doing a "bad faith” analysis, and it bothers me, because CAOS has so many parts to validly criticize, and yet he missed the mark more often than he hit it, in my humble opinion.

He basically says the same thing over and over again: that the actors were good, but the characters were bad, because they were all boring, shallow, and one-note, or whatever... and it's like... dude? of all the things you could say (especially about Zelda and Lilith in particular), the characters being “boring" isn't really the biggest criticism one ought to have of this show...?!? and it isn't even accurate?

Like why aren't you criticizing the trauma porn? Why aren't you criticizing the butchering of Lilith's mythology? Why are you ignoring all of the character development that does happen (particularly with regard to Zelda, whom he actively seems to hate) in favor of insisting none of these characters have an arc? It’s not beneficial to anyone if you’re going to criticize a show’s characters by actively misrepresenting them!

Which brings me to my next point: one of the things that bothered me the most was just how surface-level his analysis was. You could tell he hadn’t watched the show in a while, and clearly wasn’t interested in celebrating any part of it—which is okay, if you just want to roast Roberto for an hour, be my guest—but why does it feel like this video essay was the YouTube video equivalent of writing a book report on a novel you only skimmed…? He made a lot of generalizations that made it seem like he only watched the first season, and then paid no attention to the rest.

For example, some of his arguments are just so random and insignificant? Like why does he make shallow observations the basis of whole arguments about characters, such as when he goes on about how Zelda says 'Praise Satan' too much and “it got old"...?!?! Like what kind of bullshit analysis is that...? How is that even close to being something worthy of talking about in a video essay that is an hour and twenty minutes long...? Why are you taking such a trivial aspect of her character and making it a talking point in a video that is already much longer than it needs to be?

And while I agree with what he said about Lilith's motivations being inconsistent/unclear at times, and that Zelda's character growth wasn't as linear or developed as it could be, it really feels like he didn't even try to understand these characters at all. I realize I'm biased, because all I do is try to understand them and explain their motivations... but still! If you're making a video about the wasted potential of CAOS, why do you immediately dismiss almost the entire female cast, pretty much out of hand, when they're the foundation of the show...? They ARE the potential?! The good parts about them ought to have been given some credit? Like why does he fail to acknowledge all of the trauma these female characters went through that very much informs their decisions, and instead makes it sound like nothing the characters do make sense? While I might not always agree with every choice these characters made, there usually is something driving them to do whatever it is they’re doing, and particularly in the case of Lilith and Zelda, it’s not that hard to understand why they make irrational decisions sometimes, when they’re literally surrounded by abusers and everything is constantly blowing up in their faces.

Also, something smaller that really pisses me off is that he includes Zelda sending Blackwood out of the room during the birth of the twins as an example of the show's misandry and "bad feminism," but that's literally not what that moment is about? If he stopped to think about it for a moment, the moment is perfectly logical. Zelda is a midwife, who was most likely trained in the 1800s, when men literally weren't meant to be around when the the birth happened, so how is she being a misandrist just by doing what she’s been taught, especially when they’re all in a crisis situation? Men not being allowed in the room is an established part of the history of women’s health/childbirth, and it isn’t exactly obscure knowledge! Men used to be forced/asked to sit in the waiting room during labor, and before that, when home births were the status quo, midwives definitely wouldn’t allow men in the room as a matter of course. In fact, it wasn't until the 1970s that men being in the delivery room became a more normalized practice. So, men being present/witnessing a birth is a far more "modern" thing than I think people realize, and the exclusion of them from the delivery room has absolutely NOTHING to do with women hating men...? like fuck off with that “misandry” argument, in this instance. do some research before you start reaching that far, so as to act like Zelda was being hateful for simply following “industry standards,” if you want to call it that. There are medical articles that still come out to this very day that argue that no one should be in the delivery room besides the person giving birth and the doctors and nurses, because the husband/partner often gets in the way and distracts the medical team at critical moments. (Also men tend to faint or get sick at the sight of the birth, which then forces the team to split their focus in order to see to the unconscious man on the floor.)

And don't get me started on the anti-Zelda rant he goes on towards the end!! While I agree very much that Zelda is a flawed character, he uses an example of her degrading Hilda that isn't even something she actually did?! It's from a dream sequence!?!?!? like dude, did you even watch these episodes/scenes before you talked about them?!? He uses the example of dream-Zelda criticizing Hilda's appearance as a reason why Zelda is such a bitch, and I'm like... seriously? that literally wasn't her? just because Zelda said it in Hilda's nightmare, doesn't mean Zelda said it in real life, and should be criticized for it...?!

But yes, Zelda is abusive to her sister, and classist, and rude, and many of the things that he says--but when he tries to argue that because she's a woman, nobody cares that she's like that, and it’s a problem, because that’s evidence of more misandry… that’s where he loses me. He sees it as yet another issue with Roberto's writing—that he gives qualities that would be condemned in a male character to a female character, and allows that woman to be one of the "good guys" ...but yet again, dude... you're completely missing the point?!? Women are allowed to be flawed, without you seeing it as some gross failure of feminism?

He also at one point claims that Zelda resents Ambrose, and hates having him around, when I would argue Zelda actually really values Ambrose and has a close relationship to him...? Like did we even watch the same show?

I didn't expect to get this heated about a video essay that made a lot of other points that I agreed with (mainly the dragging of Roberto parts). But in my opinion, this guy got really offended by Roberto's fake feminism (which is valid), but then proceeded to tear down all of the female characters for an hour and twenty minutes straight...?! All he did was talk about how they're all misandrists and shallow characters and therefore the show isn't worth watching? like okay... but here's the thing... plenty of women have made it through shows that have misogyny at their very core, and have still managed to find the good points...? Game of Thrones is like the most popular show of all time, even though there's misogyny in every aspect of it, for historical “realism" purposes (*rolls eyes*). Zelda and Lilith's defining qualities aren't solely related to hating men, so it really pisses me off that he made it seem like that's all that shapes them, and that every time they insult or manipulate a man, it’s completely unjustified.

idk. I feel like I just watched an 83-minute roast on a show I love despite it's flaws, and that roast wasn’t mostly focused on all of the biggest flaws that I would’ve brought up, but rather on how all of the female characters are terrible and their misandry makes the show unwatchable.

So let me get this straight: you're hating on the female characters... in order to show how much of a feminist YOU are, as opposed to Roberto...?

Wow. Much feminism. Very enlightened analysis.

#zelda spellman #lilith #caos #chilling adventures of sabrina netflix

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a-dumb-sarcastic-bisexual · 3 years

Text

So I rewatched Raya.

And I was really trying to watch it without a skeptical lens. I wanted to be able to act like the oblivious kids in that theater and just enjoy the movie. But I just couldn't. I've mentioned it before it's a gorgeous movie but there are so many things wrong with it that just bug me. And I’ve mentioned before the changes that could be made to fix it and the main one being just completely scrapping the movie and starting from scratch with a tv show. And because I’m on spring break and I have nothing to do (also I’m a perfectionist and I tend to hyper-fixate on things that I know have easy solutions) I broke down how I would make it better in two different categories. The first one being kind of baseline stuff like animation and character designs and other stuff I had small problems with and the second being plot.

Section One:

Okay so I know we all hate Sisu’s design. As someone who grew up with Naga carvings and paintings all around my house seeing this Elsa fursona was like a slap to the face. Like I know I really shouldn’t expect more from Disney but I did. I mentioned in this post that I would have loved to see a longer series even if it meant the animation quality went down. And I feel like Neeith_ on TikTok did a great job of drawing what Sisu could have looked like which only disappointed me more. Caldatelier on Twitter also pointed out the many flaws with Raya’s outfit design which fully proved to me that Disney did little to no research and chose style points over historical accuracy. I also felt like the designs of the main characters were very unremarkable and before you’re like “that the whole point it’s supposed to be normal people saving the world” I don't mean that I mean it feels like they took previous designs and just made them Asian. Like my sister and I were talking about it and she said the baby just reminded her of the boss baby and Tong reminded her of one of the twins from rapunzel with a little more depth. This is also kind of a small thing but it kind of bugged me that they were all the same skin tone if not lighter. SEA is incredibly diverse and if they weren’t going to represent all of the cultures in full then they could at least shown their features. I feel like the food should have been more important. I know I mentioned it in my last post but food is an incredibly important part of our culture. It’s not a placeholder or a set-piece to make a scene look more aesthetically pleasing. It’s a way for us to bond and show each other we care it’s a way we show genuine love and appreciation. And when you have a main character who is emotionally stunted it felt like food was a perfect way for her to show her love and they blew it. Like can you imagine Raya and her dad getting into huge fights and then bringing each other food as an apology sitting in front of that window not needing to say a word because they simply get each other? Can you imagine Raya visiting Namaari and stocking up on foods that she knows Namaari loves but also hasn’t been able to eat for a while? We could have had genuinely heartwarming scenes centered around food but instead, we got set pieces and props. And one more thing that stuck with me was the voice acting this movie should have been a change for SEA voice actors to really put their names out there and be a part of a really big Disney project but as always out voiced were overshadowed by someone lighter.

Section Two:

(I’m going to warn you this is gonna be really long because I’m essentially rewriting the entire plot because as I said before I’m a perfectionist)

I feel like the first ep should be dedicated to the backstory and the lore

How were the Druuns made how where they defeated

I feel like it would have been interesting to see them fighting over the gem

But I think it would have been really interesting to see from the get-go how Sisu wasn’t the one who made the gem

So instead of having this big reveal alongside Raya, we would know that her hope of finding this all powerful Naga is hopeless because the story was a lie

Another thing I think another person who should have had more screentime was Raya’s dad

I think it would have been interesting to know his backstory and get some questions answered like “why does he have so much faith in the other rulers to help him on his journey to make Kumandra a thing?” “When did he become the protector of the gem?” “And how many attempts of stealing the gem has he thwarted”

Also as much as I love him I feel like his personality incredibly unrealistic because all SEA men I’ve met have been really emotionally stunted

Idk it’s just a small thing that made me go “eh he talks to his daughter. What kind of magic world is this?”

I would have liked to see Raya’s various attempts at becoming a protector of the gem

I think it would have been a really good way to show how resilient she is from a very young age

And when she finally succeeds the audience could have celebrated with her like a small “yes she finally got it and all her hard work finally paid off” moment

I feel like we should have gotten more Raya and Namaari moments right from the start

Like how they meet is basically the same but Raya doesn’t trust her with the gem’s location an hour after meeting her

It's a trust that both of them fought for in their own way

Like you get to see them bond over their mutual understanding of “well the worlds fucked”

So when Namaari finally stabs Raya in the back when she betrays her for the first time it hurts when she says the throwaway line about them being friends in another world in burns Raya

Because she thought they were friends and she genuinely trusted Namaari

Which would have really justified her distrust in the world

And again I feel like we should have seen that 6 year period of Raya trying to find Sisu

We would get to experience the frustration of building up the hope of finally finding her just to have it knocked down when she’s not there

It could also do two more things

Raya making genuine connections with people

And Raya and Namaari’s strange alliance forming

Now for the first one, I feel like it would have been really cool for Raya to be introduced to the different lands

And yeah sure I feel like it would make her feel like kind of a tourist but I feel like it would be really interesting to see her go through culture shock

Because she really thought she knew these places but boom they’re completely different from what she was told

And while she’s making her way around she learns about the different lands and the people inhabiting them and also their culture

We could have seen Raya make genuine connections outside of the main cast

And if you’re feeling a little masochistic we could see her lose those people because of the druune or simply because they died

But the main point is we would be able to see her become less and less selfish

Now back to Raya and Namaari’s alliance/romance later on

I mentioned in my other post that when Raya trusted Namaari to put the gem back together it felt very flat very fake

So I feel like it would be cool for the series to be split into two parts the first part being from Raya’s perspective and the second part being Namaari’s

I also feel like Namaari would have to be a constant in Raya’s journey

And what I mean by that is like she’s there every other episode either trying to stop Raya or she’s trying to save her from life or death situations

And later on down the line, we find out the main reason why she kept helping Raya (in her own way) was that she didn’t want to see her get seriously hurt

But anyway that’s mostly backstory and now we’re in the present tense

And like I said before we know that Sisu wasn’t the one who made the gem so we know that Raya’s quest is pointless

But because we’ve seen her various attempts at becoming the protector of the gem and the six years of looking for Sisu we know she’s too stubborn to give up just yet

So she and Sisu head out to find the other gem pieces

Now with context, her and Namaari’s standoff has more tension because for the first time in years Namaari doesn’t know the motives behind Raya’s actions

I don’t really have many ideas for Sisu other than she starts to trust people less and less

Like she’s still really innocent for the most part but there’s a small part of her a really small part that’s kind of lost faith in humanity

And after this, we meet Boun

I feel like we should have known more about Boun considering the fact he’s the first side characters we met

But it’s very clear they gave no thought to his character I’m sure they just wrote down “funny kid who lost his family”

This is such a shame because he could have been so much more than just “Raya’s funny younger brother”

Like he could have been this selfless kid who hands out food to the orphans around and offering his ship to homeless people during the night

Next with the baby and the monkeys, there’s really not much you can do with them unless you seriously age them up

Like at the very least have Noi be a grade-schooler who can express more emotions than mad and hungry

Like she can still be the baby of the group while taking care of herself and expressing her emotions a great example of this is Polly from amphibia (which is a great show with a SEA main character you should check it out)

With Tong, I have two words: Survivors Guilt which is something Raya would be able to relate to in fact they all would

I feel like Tong’s entire character arc would be him realizing that he can’t save everyone

Which yeah sure would seem pretty contradictory with the ending being them literally saving everybody but I have a fix for that too

And finally, we get to Namaari who is selfless to a fault

Giving me very much typical Disney princess she gives up food to kids who seem particularly hungry

She’s usually the one who tells the stories to the kids but her mom was taking over that day

She helps her people in any way she can and honestly, she’s wearing herself a little thin

Because while she’s doing all that she’s also saving Raya & co from their own mistakes

Giving me very much burning the candle at both ends

So you see all these characters bonding over the course of at least a year

Making and losing more allies along the way

And because Namaari has been helping them they trust her… for the most part

But there have been times when she trips them up and makes their end goal all the more difficult

And because they haven’t known her as long as Raya has each character has at least one moment when they look up at the sky and scream in frustration “What is this binturi’s deal!”

But anyway they finally get to fang and Raya is more open to the idea of just talking to Namaari because she trusts her not because Sisu told her to but because she’s seen Namaari do good

And Namaari is even more reluctant to take the gem pieces by force because she has a decent relationship with Raya like yeah sure they’re not best friends but they’re in a good place

And shocker shocker she’s maybe just maybe head over heels in love with the princess of heart

But her mother gives her an ultimatum and that is “either you take it from her or I will”

Because here’s the thing, Queen Virana isn't a moron the exact opposite in fact and she knows her daughter has been going easy on Raya these past six years

She also knows that she could squash Raya under her shoe if she damn well pleased and Namaari knows this too

So when Namaari gets her necklace back she doesn’t even hesitate to take her crossbow when she leaves

The meet up goes basically the same except its more Raya talking Namaari down than Sisu

And while they’re having their little heart to heart Sisu notices Namaari’s finger twitch and she goes to jump in front of Raya

And Namaari was shaken by the sudden movement and fires and kills Sisu

I feel like this would make Raya furious for two reasons one she killed her best friend and two she deep down trusted Namaari to do the right thing

So when the fight goes down instead of the whole “I don't care if you trust me because Sisu did” it would be “I trusted you and you murdered her”

And when the dust settles Raya realizes that this battle doesn’t matter because fighting Namaari isn’t going to bring Sisu and she’s also sick and tired of hurting the people she loves

And she decides to help people instead not because Sisu would want her to but because its the right thing to do

Which is cliche sure but its better than the scene they gave us which really wasn’t faithful to her character arc of not caring for people who aren't close to her

And I feel like Namaari joining her makes more sense with my context if anything else

And here’s how I would fix this scene even with them fighting the Druune off to the best of their abilities there are still falling buildings and the gem can’t really save people from that

So they lose some people not because of the Druune but because death happens even when the heroes are fighting their hardest

And because I feel like this would just affirm Tong’s character arc because there are people dying under these buildings he knows it’ll take too long to save them and its not time they have

So he leaves them behind prioritizing the people he knows he can save

Anyway, after a long battle scene, they finally end up underground

And it goes basically the same except it doesn’t take Raya as long to convince them

And instead of Raya’s reasoning of “Sisu told us to” it's more “all this fighting isn't going to bring Sisu back” and “I know she’s done something terrible and you can be mad at her after this but for now trust her”

So when they all make their sacrifices it’s less “I’m doing this for Raya” and more “I’m doing this because deep down I know you’ll do the right thing”

And Namaari does do the right thing obviously

Sisu comes back and it's all “yay we saved the world!” but it doesn’t really end there

Because I hate the “lifetime” ending of “even though we all went through incredibly traumatic events we’re all fine months later” no they’re running around for months and years fixing their mess

And while this is happening Raya and Namaari is mending their relationship they’ve apologized for all the terrible things they’ve done to each other

And when they’re fixing their world they’re helping each other become the best versions of themselves

That’s when they really fall in love

Like don't get me wrong they loved each other when all the bad shit was going down but there was too much bad blood them to really process it and talk it out

But that’s exactly what they do when it’s all over they talk it out for hours

In fact, they both said its the most they’ve heard the other speak

They both agree they’re in the best place to start a relationship and so they do

#disney raya #raya #namaari #rayaari #raya and the last dragon #did I just basically write the rough draft for a tv show in the span of 4 hours #yes yes I did

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forthehpfanboys · 4 years

Text

Two Years

Pair: Fred Weasley x Reader; he/him.

Summary: You got back to Diagon Alley after the war and desperately wanna talk to him and explain why you were basically non-existent during the war. But is Fred ready to talk to you?

Warnings: Swearing.

Notes: Reader is Draco's Cousin! Hope you enjoy!

~DO NOT REPOST ANYWHERE~

Complicated couldn’t even begin to describe your relationship with the Weasley’s.

For to start, you were related to the Malfoys which automatically meant it was rocky. You were Draco’s cousin. Your family didn’t believe in the same ideology as Lucius and Narcissa, leading to family feuds being normal during literally any time of the year. Your family didn’t exactly want the attention of the Malfoys or the Dark Lord once the war reared its ugly head, so your family fled to America, dragging you with them. They wanted to get as far from the war as possible.

And two, well, you were Fred’s partner before the war broke out. Since your family was absolutely dedicated to being hidden, you lost communication with him when your family decided to just get up and go. You didn’t even have time to tell him goodbye or really anyone and it hurt. You knew you hurt him too and no matter how you begged, your parents wouldn’t let you see him, let alone send him a letter. Owls couldn’t travel across whole seas and you were basically in lock down, even if you were a grown adult.

You stayed up most nights because of nightmares. You’d wake up in a cold sweat more times than you could count on both hands. After these tear jerking visions from hell, you’d usually climb from your bedroom window to the room, gazing out at the moon like a love struck teenager, hoping maybe even praying Fred was gazing at the moon at the same time you were.. Most nights he actually was.

During the war, Fred had come into a.. Complication. He ended up fracturing his leg, resulting in a cane and physical therapy. George took up fixing and running the shop with Ron while he was borderline trapped between surviving at the Burrow and physical therapy.

Fred spent most of his free time sketching out ideas of products to tire his mind long enough to ignore the stupid nightmares and gazing out the window, hoping you’d apperate across the field and come comfort him, but you never came. Everyone in the Burrow avoided mentioning your name around Fred, anyway.

When the time came, Fred went straight back to work with his twin, spewing out ideas about different treats, potions, trinkets, anything and everything he came up with while bed ridden and they both got to work quickly.

It was nice, relaxing, normal again. Everything was normal to Fred but a piece of him was missing. You were across the world and you held a piece of his heart and he hated you never gave it back.

No matter how badly he missed you or longed for you to hold his hand, he wasn’t ready to face you when you entered their shop. He literally wasn’t ready to face you. He turned around when the bell went off, ready to say the shop wasn’t open yet but dropped the box he was holding. He ignored the sound of shattering glass and immediately booked it back into the room, where he nearly knocked over his brother.

“What’s wrong?” George asked, swiftly setting the box he was holding down on the shelf. “Are you going into another attack? Do you need to go upsta-” He was silenced when Fred's hand covered his mouth.

“Hello?” A soft voice called out, causing George's eyebrows to furrow before his eyes grew wide. Fred moved his hand, using it to slowly shut the storage room door, making sure to turn the handle so it shut silently. The separation allowed the twins to whisper to each other in peace.

“Isn't that-”

“Yeah.”

“Then why-”

“Because I’m not ready.”

“..You’re not ready? Blimey, Fred, it’s been 2 years since he left.” George ran a hand down his face, the other landing on his hip sassily. “What do you mean you're not ready? You always talked about how you missed him but now you aren't ready?”

“You wouldn’t understand-”

“Don’t even give me that, Freddie. Talk to me.” George smiled, resting a hand on his brother's shoulder. “I know you're older by like, 1/4 a second, but you don’t have to be a rock. Come on, don’t bottle it up.”

Fred let out a sigh, his eyes casting downward before he let out the smallest of chuckles. His hand came to rub the back of his neck.

“Fine.”

George almost squealed with joy when his brother decided to open up to him. He wanted to clap his hands and jump around like a child, but opted for not compromising their position.

Fred went on to tell George about how you left, how you didn’t even leave a note, how he didn’t know how to ask if you two were still together and if you loved him anymore. George has already known all of this, causing his face to melt into an unamused expression.

“.. You realize you're being ridiculous, right?”

“Gee, thanks George. I will most definitely come back to you when I have emotional turmoil.”

“No, no, mate, listen.” George wrapped his arm around his older brother's shoulder, gently guiding him away from the wall. “Listen, ok? You’re such a top notch guy, not as handsome as me,” George smiled wider when his brother snorted, “but you’re trying! So why not at least talk to the bloke, yeah? You guys were snogging before he left, so why not try to snog after?”

“I just told you why I can’t.”

“Who are you and what did you do with Fredrick Weasley?” George put the back of his hand across his forehead, being the dramatic shit he is.

“Don’t call me that, you prat-”

“I thought I knew you! Confidence was your middle name! Frederick Confident Gideon Weasley!” The youngest twin only became cockier when the older one groaned and covered his face. “Oh, Frederick, where did you go?” He wrapped his free arm tighter around his brother and dragged him out the door, ignoring his protests and grabby hands reaching to hold onto the door frame.

“George, wait!” Fred’s hushed whisper floated in the air, completely ignored by the other red-head.

“Fredrick! Where did you go, Freddie?!” He called out, knowing damn well you were still in the shop. Neither of the twins heard the shops bell ring a second tie, indication your departure.

“George?” Your voice echoed in the closed shop, leading George to dramatically turn to his brother and smirk at him. “Is that you?”

“Why yes, my dear friend! How are you?” George let go of his twin, allowing him to scurry off to the side and hide behind one of their many filled shelves. You walked up to him just after Fred hid, much to his delight and George’s dismay. George’s smile faltered ever so slightly when he took in your appearance.

Your hair was a nest fit for Scabbers, the bags under your eyes would need to be checked with baggage at any muggle airport and your clothes. Not that there was anything wrong with a hoodie and sweatpants, but it was summer for fucks sake. He could see the sweat across his brow and wondered if he should turn the AC on.

“I’m as well as I can be, I guess..” You fiddled with a stray strand hanging from your hoodie. George noted the fraying hand made thumb holes and his eyebrow raised in confusion. “I um-” You ran a hand through your hair, “I wanted to talk to Fred, do you know where he is?” While your eyes were darting across the top level of the shop, George’s eyes flashed to his brother.

The shop owner shot his brother a glare when he shook his head back and forth fast enough to make anyone dizzy.

“Um, no.. I haven't.” George grumbled out, his hands going to his pockets. He looked down at the floor deciding it would be better than the disappointed expression on your face. “Um, do you want me to give him a message for something?”

“No, yeah, if that’s ok?” You went back to fiddling with the stray thread. You didn’t notice Fred peaking at you through the products lined on the shelves. “Just um- Could you tell him I’m sorry for me? I’m sure he’ll know what I mean..”

“Yeah, sure thing, (Y/n/n). Anything for you.” George ran a hand through his hair after you turned on your heel and mumbled a thank you before exiting the shop. “You owe me.” The red-head turned to his identical and sighed when he saw the longing expression. “Merlin’s left tit, you’re fucked, mate.”

“I should’ve-” Fred hit his forehead against the wood of one of the shelves, a yell of frustration leaving his throat.

“Say it.” “..You were right. I should’ve talked to him.”

“Damn right I was. Now, go get your bloke before he cries in the street or worse, goes to Malfoy for romantic help.” George faked a shudder at the idea. George watched his brother turn, slamming his back into the shelf and slide to the floor. “Ok, Fred, seriously, this is getting kind of sad.”

“I can’t go talk to him, George!” Fred was pulling at his own ginger locks, his knees coming up to his chest. “I- No, I can’t.”

“Do you want me to do it?” George’s voice was soft. He plopped himself on the dusty floor right next to his brother. “I can talk to him as you? See what all of this is about?”

“I don’t know, Georgie..” Fred’s voice was softer than his twins. He looked at his brother with a hopeless expression and glossy eyes. George figured from this it would be best to tackle the problem tomorrow so he just pulled his brother into his side and held him for a good while.

The next day was easier for Fred. The store was bustling, as it was Monday, morning and all the happy customers provided a great distraction. He took over the register while George focused more on the floor work: answering customer questions, restocking shelves. It was a lot for two twins to handle, but they managed, especially when Ginny or Ron offered their free days to come down and help.

Fred had just finished closing the drawer, handing a youngster his change back when the bell above the shop's door caught his attention. He shifted on his feet when Draco was practically dragging you into the shop wearing the same clothes as yesterday. The red-head was starting to wonder if you were ok.

“(Y/n)!” George yanked you into a hug before you could even blink, causing you to erupt into a fit of giggles that left Fred absolutely yearning to have you by his side again.

“Hey Geo!” You briefly hugged him back before pulling away, causing his attention to shift to your cousin.

“Malfoy.” George looked the blonde up and down. He’d throw hands if he had too, even in his own shop.

“Hey, be nice. He’s on our side now.” You punched the tall suited man lightly in the arm before shoving your hands in your pockets.

“It’s unfortunate but true. Most birds did appreciate my bad boy ages.” Draco ran a hand dramatically through his hair while George snorted. “But that isn’t why we’re here. Is your brother around?”

“He’s at the til, why?”

“I’m just here to make sure (Y/n) actually talks to him like he promised too.” Draco put a hand on your back and gently pushed you forward. “But how is business, Weasley?”

While George went on to talk about statistics and boring old shit, you slowly walked over to the red-head who was trying to distract himself by restocking some of the knickknacks in the class case beneath the counter. You cleared your throat, clearly scaring him. He let out a squeak and hit his head on the underside of the glass case.

“I-I’m sorry, Freddie! Are you ok?” you asked, your hands awkwardly fidgeting in front of you as the male stood up and rubbed the back of his head. You bit your lip, resisting the urge to grab his shoulders and check his head.

“Yeah, yeah, I’m good.” He had his eyes squinted so tight he could see stars flashing behind his lids. He couldn’t look at you yet. You’d looked like a kicked puppy yesterday when you left and it pained him so much.

“Did, um.. Did you get my message from Geo?” You were fiddling with the string again. Fred opened his eyes slowly, nodding to you while he played with the product in his hand.

“I.. Look, I don’t wanna beat around the bush, but I-”

“I already know.” Fred spoke up quickly, louder than intended. “I know, it’s fine.”

“S.. So it’s fine then?” You looked around, a tiny bit confused. Fred wasn’t one for jumping to conclusions, but it seemed his legs weren’t tired yet.

“Yeah.”

“So, I just wanna be sure we’re on the same page, you know my family dragged me to America?”

“Uh-”

“And basically put me under house arrest so I couldn’t see you or message you or leave or really live? And I haven’t forgotten you and my feelings for you haven’t changed and Godric, Fred, I miss you so much.” Tears pricked your tired eyes as you glanced at him. You cleared your throat over the awkward silence you felt was your fault. Fred was replaying your words like a record stuttering on a player and the bloke was still confused.

“.. Come again?” The red-head blinked stupidly, subconsciously leaning over the counter. Maybe he wasn’t hearing you right over the noise of the shop. You couldn’t help but release a borderline silent chuckle that bubbled into your throat.

“I still love you, Freddie bear.” You twiddled with your fingers, your eyes glancing down to his lips before looking back into his sparkling eyes.

“You do?” The co-owner was trying to keep his joy nestled deep down in his chest.

You nodded your head.

“Oh thank fuck.”

“Wha- Ah! FRED-”

The male had all but jumped over the glass counter, dramatically picking you up by your waist and slamming his lips to yours. You wrapped your legs around his waist, while your hands gripped to his shoulders like your life depended on it. You immediately fell under the spell of his kiss and didn’t even hear your cousin and your boyfriend's twin brother whooping/gagging.

Fred soon set you down, his usual cocky grin spread across his face until his knee buckled. The strain of his dumb ass jumping over the counter and picking you off your feet like you were a feather was finally catching up with him.

“Ah, ow, ow.” Fred groaned out, bending over to hold his right knee. You put a hand on his shoulder, worry etched across his face. “Ah, so um.. I should probably explain-”

“We both have a lot to explain, Freddie. Two years is a lot of time to be apart.”

#fred weasley x male reader #fred weasley imagine #fred weasley #hp imagine #hp x male reader #male reader #george weasley #draco malfoy #x male reader #Ronny Writes #fic #hp male fic #hp fic

242 notes · View notes

writtenbynightlock · 3 years

Text

synopsis: college kept your life busy. the miya twins also have a life of their own. with your secretive nature, things became complicated.

genre: angst, fluff, friends to lovers

wc: 4.9k

warnings: mentions of physical abuse, college au, series, post time-skip spoilers

Part 2 | Part 4

“Happy birthday, Kaori-chan!” you say with a big smile on your face as you hugged the birthday girl. Pulling away, you gawked at how stunning Kaori looks. Being a fashion designer student definitely screams with the outfit she was wearing. You were amazed when Kaori told you she made the dress herself. Atsumu greeted with a friendly hug.

“Thank you so much, (Y/n)-chan and Atsumu! Come on, let’s take some photos” says Kaori as she whisked you away from Atsumu’s side. Atsumu smiles as he saw his teammate since high school, Suna Rintarou.

“Are Kita and the others coming?” asks Atsumu as he hands in yours and the twins’ birthday gifts for Kaori. Suna receives it and places it on the table at the corner full with the rest of the gifts.

“Kaori-chan haven’t met them yet except for Aran so he’s the one she invited.” Suna looks at Atsumu then you then back at the setter, a puzzled expression on his face.

“How come (Y/N)-chan came with you and not Nakamura-san?”

“Well about that. They broke up, Suna.”

“Well that’s troublesome. Kaori also invited Nakamura-kun” says Suna as he leans onto the wall, the two men looking at you and Kaori taking photos with the cake and taking selfies.

“What?! What are we gonna do?!” exclaims Atsumu in a low voice, only for Suna to hear and him starting to panic. Moments later, more guests started to arrive. Atsumu felt relief wash through his body as he saw Aran coming into view.

“Aran-kun ya!” Atsumu runs up to his former teammate and jumps on him.

“Wha- get off of me, Atsumu!” Aran just wanted to enjoy this night with his friends, not being tired out by Atsumu’s antics as he had enough of dealing with twins for years. Aran knows the twins since they were around ten, making him the instruction manual of the Miya twins as he knows them extremely well.

“Aran-kun, ya gotta help me.”

“With what?”

Looking around cautiously, Atsumu then gestures for Aran to lean in closer. As Atsumu was about to speak, Suna interrupts the both of them.

“(Y/n)-chan and Nakamura-san broke up and Atsumu doesn’t want to make (Y/n)-chan feel uncomfortable when he comes over” says Suna as the three men were outside the restaurant to avoid the crowd.

“What? How is (Y/n)-san coping with the break up?” says Aran with a worried expression. You and Aran were pretty close back then when you were still Inarizaki’s manager. The two of you bonded because of the Miya twins. He was the person you would always run to whenever the twins have a fight that you can’t seem to break them apart yourself. Other than that, you’ve always found Aran as a mature, kind and soft person.

“That’s the problem! I don’t know how she’s doing because she won’t tell me!”

“Have you asked her though?” Atsumu remains silent at Suna’s retort.

“Boke!” says Aran as he flicks Atsumu’s forehead, making the golden haired setter groan in pain.

“Does she even know that you knew about the break up?”

“No and please no more flicking!” says Atsumu as he protectively covers his forehead, not wanting to get a flick from Aran. The former ace sighs and ran a hand over his face in frustration.

“Where is Osamu anyway?”

“At home...studying for an important test.”

“Okay, here’s what we’re gonna do. Let’s pretend like we didn’t have this conversation. When Nakamura does come, we’ll make sure he doesn’t try anything. That guy is kind of mischievous sometimes” says Aran as the three of them were huddled in a small circle, making sure not anyone was hearing their conversation.

“And what if he does try something, what shall we do?”

Aran flicks Atsumu’s forehead again, “do I have to lay everything out for you? I swear you are a genius in the court but you’re such an airhead when it comes to these things.”

“It’s not much of a surprise. When it comes to (Y/n)-san, he becomes the world’s biggest idiot.” Atsumu sends Suna a sharp look to which Suna smirked with pleasure upon seeing Atsumu’s reaction.

“What are ya even talking about?!”

“Oh you know what I’m talking about. You’re still trying to deny it, huh?” says Suna. Atsumu grabbed Suna’s collar, trying to threaten him.

“Listen here ya racoon-”

“Come on Atsumu don’t deny it. We know you’ve liked (Y/n)-chan since the day you asked her to be our manager.”

“No I don’t!”

“Really now?”

“Are you two seriously gonna fight?” Aran says as he try to break apart the two.

Atsumu releases his grip from Suna’s collar, the said man who still had an amused look on his face. Suna can’t help in butting into Atsumu’s business. He just wants his friend to accept his feelings. He could still remember the time when Atsumu found out you were dating Nakamura. The setter was devastated. He spent his time practicing longer by doing his spike serves which were much more powerful that Atsumu actually got one ball lose air. It was obvious during their practices when Atsumu would give Nakamura a hard time during your first few weeks of dating but as time passes by, the more defeated Atsumu became when it comes to you.

“What are you boys doing out here? The party’s about to start.” The three men’s eyes landed on you by the door of the restaurant. Your face brightens upon seeing Aran. A big smile made its way to your face and you quickly ran up to him with Aran welcoming you in for a hug.

“Ojiro-san! What a nice surprise” you say as you pulled away. Aran peers down at you with a warm smile on his face as if they were not discussing something related to you earlier.

“It’s nice see you again, (Y/n)-chan. It’s been a while, hasn’t it?”

“It has! Let’s catch up inside. We don’t want to worry the birthday girl” you say and headed to the restaurant. The three boys looked at each other with knowing looks. There’s a mission they need fulfill.

To them, you are still their precious manager and long time friend.

The party began in full swing. It started with taking photos. Eating delicious meals and it then transitioned to blowing of the birthday cake. Everyone was enjoying every moment. You also got to talk to other girls that Kaori invited from her major. They were all gorgeous and you can’t help but feel a little insecure. Tall and petite. You’ve been surrounded by boys mostly in your teens due to you managing the men’s volleyball club.

The guys and girls seemed to have their own little world. The guys were in another corner, just chatting and drink some alcohol while you and the girls were on a different table, gossiping and getting to know each other.

“I’m really excited for our upcoming fashion show, Kaori-chan! I’m a bit jealous with the theme you got but I’m sure you’ll do it justice” says Shioko excitedly. You were a bit out of place. Kaori and her friends were talking about their upcoming projects together. One of Kaori’s friends noticed how uncomfortable you were so she converses with you but not the intention you expected.

“Hey, (Y/n)-san I heard that you’re pretty close with that blonde guy over there?” asks Miyake with a flirty smile on her face as she points her wine glass at Atsumu who was enjoying his time talking to his former teammates.

“Uhm yes why?”

“Are you two dating?” asks Miyake with a smile.

“No they aren’t. (Y/n)-chan here actually has a boyfriend but it seems that he’s running late. Do you know why, (Y/n)-chan?” says Kaori with a bright smile on her face but your mood suddenly shifts but you forced a smile. The other girls started to perk up their interest in you as they heard you have a boyfriend.

“He says something came up but I’m sure he’ll come.” You say, scratching your neck, feeling uncomfortable as the attention was suddenly shifted to you.

Why did you have to lie?

You don’t feel comfortable telling people that you’ve just met that you’ve broken up with your boyfriend. To Kaori, it’s fine to tell her, now that the subject relating to that was brought up and considering you’ve known her for a year but you don’t want for her friends to hear. It’s too personal.

“Great! So that means he’s available?” Miyake says, setting the subject about your affairs aside as her interest was fully on Atsumu.

“Pretty much yeah” a victorious smile emerged from Miyake’s face as those words slipped off your mouth.

“You don’t mind if I go talk to him, do you?” she asks, faking a sweet smile but before you could answer, she started fixing up her hair and make up. The rest of Kaori’s friends started to get excited and helped Miyake. Kaori leans onto your ear, “I’m sorry about Miyake. She’s just really friendly... when it comes to guys.”

A content smile grazed over Miyake’s lips as she stands up.

“Time to have some fun” but before she left, Miyake thanked you then went towards the corner where Aran, Suna and Atsumu were sitting. Cheers erupted from her friends.

“Go get him tiger!”

“He’s quite the hottie, isn’t he?” says Yuki, another friend from Kaori’s major. You can’t deny, Atsumu is definitely good looking. Comparing him to Osamu, even though they practically have the same face, something about Atsumu that he gives off makes him more attractive. The girls suddenly changed topic to the boys they have dated. You were surprised at hearing how Yuki dated a college student back when she was still a high school student.

“(Y/n)-san, tell us more about your boyfriend. What is he like?” asks Yuki with a smile, intrigued of what type of guys you date. You wanted to get out of there. You feel so uncomfortable. You don’t even know your emotional range as of the moment. You’ve been keeping all your feelings to yourself. It was only one time when you totally broke down. It was during Osamu’s visit. You don’t have time to dwell on your break up because you still have a lot of things to prioritize in your studies but somehow you still feel hurt and feel like you’re about to cry. You’re still human too. You wanted to express how you feel.

One’s gaze kept piercing at you. Ever since you sat down with Kaori and her friends, you can’t help but feel that Shioko was a bit off towards you. She has this look on her face that didn’t sit well with you.

Looking at your wine glass, it was all empty. You suddenly want more. You raised your glass, gesturing for the waiter to pour you more. With your glass refilled, you took a huge gulp, emptying its contents before answering the question.

“He’s an athlete”

“Really? My boyfriend is an athlete too!” Shioko interjects, suddenly interested as the two of you have something in common to talk about.

“Ooh! Are you and your mystery guy finally official?” Kaori says, wiggling her eyebrows at Shioko.

“Yeah! In case you didn’t know, (Y/n)-san, we’ve been seeing each other for awhile now but I’m glad he finally asked me to be his girlfriend. Poor guy. He told me his last break up was bad. His ex was awful to him.”

“Is he a nice guy?”

“So nice. Poor girl who broke up with him. He’s quite the catch. I mean he is such a gentleman, caring, kind and great in bed.”

“Oh my goodness Shioko I can’t believe you! You’re at that stage already?” says Kaori who somewhat got excited for her friend.

“I’ve heard of that before” you mumbled but Kaori, Yuki and Shioko heard you loud and clear.

“What?”

Your eyes widened. You said something out loud from your thoughts again.

“Oh it’s nothing.” You say, trying to fake a laugh and looked away, taking another sip of wine.

“So, what’s his name, Shioko-chan?”

You started to feel a bit lightheaded. Is it because of the wine? You can’t seem to focus on the conversation. Your eyes feel droopy. Was it past your bedtime already?

“Oh you’ll meet him real soon.”

You looked down and closed your eyes, holding your head. Kaori notices your sudden discomfort.

“(Y/n)-chan, you okay?” asks Kaori with worried eyes, her hand on you back, trying to sooth you.

“Yeah I just uh need water. Yeah water.”

“Okay I’ll call the waiter” says Kaori and quickly gestures for the waiter to give you a glass of water quickly. “Hang in there, (Y/n)-chan. You must’ve had too much wine today” says Kaori, trying to lighten up the mood. You really weren’t feeling well. You wanted to vomit.

As the waiter gave you a glass of water, you chug onto it.

“Slow down, (Y/n)-chan. At this point, you’ll vomit. Do you want to go to the restroom?”

You shake your head, insisting you were fine. As Kaori decided to let it go and somewhat convinced that you just needed to rest a little, she returned to the conversation with her friends. You felt your phone vibrate in your purse. You saw Atsumu’s name.

Wanna go home?

Looking up, you glanced to where Atsumu and the others were. You saw how Miyake was trying to converse and be close to him. The discomfort displayed across Atsumu’s face was hilarious.

“Look! My boyfriend’s here. Over here baby!”

Shioko points to the door, a tall figure walking in. Shioko excitedly stands up and runs up to her boyfriend, all the attention on them. You felt like your world has stopped. Your grip onto the glass of water you were holding suddenly loosened, making it shatter on the ground.

Silence fills in the restaurant.

“Kaori, this is my boyfriend, Nakamura Kyo.”

Kaori, Aran, Suna and Atsumu’s eyes were then on you, worry plastered all over their faces. You and Nakamura locked eyes. The fear and anger started flare inside you. You remembered the times when he would yell at you every time you would reject to satisfy his needs. You remembered the times when he gripped your arms, forcing you into something you didn’t want to be involved in but you fought back, ending you with bruises. At this point, seeing him made your hands go cold and shake in fear.

Kaori stands up and slowly walked towards Shioko and Nakamura. She stopped in front of them at a safe distance and anger suddenly fills her.

“Shioko, I hate to break it to you but you’ve got the wrong guy. Nakamura-san is (Y/n)-chan’s boyfriend.” Shioko’s eyes widened and looks at you with flare in her eyes. You still looked at your ex-boyfriend, too overwhelmed.

“No. He is my boyfriend-”

“(Y/n) and I broke up for awhile now” says Nakamura, his cold gaze still on you.

Kaori looks back at you but you were still glued to your spot, afraid and threatened but you were also feeling bold. You wanted to scream. Yell at Nakamura to your heart’s content.

“(Y/n)-chan, is this true?”

You look away and let out a breath. You felt so lame. You pretended that you were still dating Nakamura. Slowly grabbing your purse, you stand up but felt wobbly. You held onto the wall for support. It must’ve been the alcohol.

“but why did- hold on, what’s going on here?!” Kaori asks, puzzled as she looks at you and Shioko and Nakamura back and forth. Suna quickly steps into the scene, trying to calm down his girlfriend and take her away from the scene, not wanting for Kaori to be stressed.

Aran was about to step in when Atsumu stopped him, shaking his head.

“What are you-”

“It’s been awhile since we’ve seen her rage mode, right Aran-kun?”

Atsumu knows you. This was your time to shine. All the unspoken feelings will be finally expressed. Atsumu recognizes that flare in your eyes. You deserve to be heard.

A sudden feeling of confidence came to you. Walking in your heels, you walked towards Nakamura and Shioko with threat displayed in your eyes that would make anyone cower in fear.

Stopping in front of them, your eyes were fixed on Nakamura. You had full confidence that he wasn’t gonna try anything to you because there are a lot of people surrounding you. Without knowing, your hand made its way across his face, the sound of impact echoing through the room.

Everything remained still and quiet.

That felt good.

“How dare you slap him!” Shioko was silenced by your intense stare. You looked back at Nakamura who had his jaw clenched and an uneasy expression on his face.

“You had the audacity to tell other people that I was being a horrible girlfriend to you just because I won’t get into your pants?!”

Everyone’s eyes widened. Atsumu smirked at the scene before him. He definitely was shocked at the new information but he was rooting for you.There was no way in stopping you once you’ve gone on full rage mode. He can’t help but feel proud of you for letting your anger out. Atsumu has known you for a long time. You were secretive yes but seeing you finally getting out of your shell was one of the things he grew to admire about you.

“You had the audacity in playing the victim? Shioko-kun here told me you’ve been dating for quite awhile and you guys recently made it official. Meaning to say, you were cheating on me while we were still dating? I can’t believe I wasted so much time with you. Sometimes I wonder if your intentions with me are genuine or you just want have someone to sleep with?”

You say, your voice betraying you as it began to shake from the overwhelming feeling of emotions that you felt like you were gonna be sick. The wine didn’t help either. Tears started to roll down your eyes. All these pent up feelings starting to release.

“Well I’m glad you’ve found someone who gets to sleep with you-”

You suddenly felt a hand make its contact on your face, the burning sensation tingling on your skin. You look at Shioko with wide eyes. She was fuming.

“(Y/n)-chan!” exclaims Kaori, panicked. Aran and Atsumu quickly went to your aid. Aran stood in between you and Nakamura and Shioko, spreading his arms a little.

“Shioko! Why did you do that?!” Kaori yells at Shioko with pure anger in her eyes.

“That bitch is implying that I’m a slut!”

“She didn’t say that.” Aran says, his gaze at the girl.

“I can’t believe you Nakamura-kun! (Y/n)-chan cares for you and you just let that slide? And you, Shioko. You dare to press on (Y/n) when you clearly knew what was going on. We are not friends anymore. You two are cheaters. Get out!” Kaori exclaims, pointing to the door.

Outnumbered, Nakamura and Shioko quickly left the restaurant. It then went quiet.

“I’m sorry for letting my personal problems get in the way of your special day, Kaori-san” you say with a forced smile, the look of defeat in your eyes before storming out of the restaurant, not looking back. You wanted to be alone right now. You needed to breath.

You suddenly felt a hand wrapped around your wrist, stopping you in your tracks. You flinched and looked away, thinking it was Nakamura, afraid he might hurt you but this touch was gentle.

“Hey, it’s me” says Atsumu in a soft tone as he looks at you. He can’t help but feel angry to what trauma Nakamura has influenced to you that you flinched at his touch. You turn around slowly, meeting Atsumu’s gently gaze. It made your heart skip a beat.

“What do you want, piss head?” You say as you started to feel relaxed that it was Atsumu. You can’t seem to focus on what he was saying as you felt your eyes getting droopy. Atsumu scrunched his nose at the nickname you addressed him.

“You’re drunk. I’ll take you home”

“No. I’ll go home on my own.” You say, trying to get out from his grip but Atsumu doesn’t let go. He can’t let you go home alone like this. You’re not in your right state of mind.

“Quit being stubborn, (Y/n)-chan. I also don’t want to get a mouthful from Osamu knowing that I didn’t take you home.”

With a sigh, you nodded and walked with your long time friend. Atsumu wrapped an arm around your shoulders due to your wobbly steps. Atsumu guides you to his car. He helps you get comfortable in your seat. As you hit the soft material, you immediately passed out from the mental and emotional stress you’ve put up today. Atsumu fastens your seatbelt before settling his. Before he drove away, he reclines your seat for you to rest comfortably.

“Watch your step or we both go down!”

Atsumu says as he tries to climb you two up the stairs to your apartment. You kept saying slurred words and laughed that Atsumu couldn’t help but sigh. Arriving at your doorstep, you faced Atsumu with a cheeky smile.

“‘Tsumu, why do you smell like lemons? Is it because of your hair?” you say with a giggle as you play with his hair, sending blood rushing through his cheeks. He gently grabs your wrist and gently places at your side. He let his other hand make its way to your cheeks, gently caressing the red mark imprinted by the slap awhile ago.

“Does it still hurt?”

You and Atsumu locked eyes. The way he caressed your cheek sent butterflies to your stomach. You stayed silent. You can’t help but feel overwhelmed by the warm feeling inside your chest.

“Let’s get that iced” He says with a soft smile. As you punch in your code, you opened the door, you can’t help but feel a bit lonely once you enter. You suddenly felt sad and felt the need of someone to talk to. Atsumu notices the frown on your face. He hates seeing you like this. You were just so selfless to not let others know what’s been troubling you. He hates how you always put others first before yourself. Who was taking care of you?

“(Y/n)-chan. Are you okay?”

You look up at Atsumu as you were trying to take off your heels. You stared into Atsumu’s eyes. Those hazelnut eyes that you admire ever since high school. Atsumu was the one who always light up your world. He’s childish. He would make you laugh whenever you feel down. Atsumu always knew what the definition of fun was when it comes to you. He may not be good with words when it comes to comforting someone but he’s definitely good at making you feel better by distracting you from your troubles like buying you your favorite ice cream.

This was another side of Atsumu that you have yet to discover.

“Yeah”

Without saying a word, Atsumu heads inside first, walking towards the fridge to only find a pack of peas. Seeing you struggle to walk steadily, Atsumu placed the pack of peas on the kitchen counter and helps you in your steps, leading you to the couch. Your body fell heavily on the soft cushions, making you sigh in relief as you finally got comfortable.

Atsumu then comes back, kneeling in front of you and gently places the cold pack of peas on your cheek, making you hiss at the sudden coldness.

“So ‘Tsumu, how are things with you and Miyake? Did you two hit it off?” Atsumu scoffs and adjusts the pack of peas on your cheek.

“I’m pretty sure you know how uncomfortable I was.”

“She’s quite the looker you know.”

Atsumu remained silent until he got the courage to ask you that’s been bothering him.

“Why didn’t you tell me when Nakamura was forcing you into things, (Y/n)-chan? You know I’m willing to you listen and help you anytime, even when you call me in the middle of practice.”

Another tug in your heart. Volleyball is Miya Atsumu’s entire life but him telling you that he was willing to listen to you even when he’s in practice was making you confused. What does he mean?

“Really? The great Miya Atsumu will allow someone to interrupt him during practice?” you chuckled, but Atsumu’s face morphed into a serious one and focused his gaze on the pack of peas.

“You’re not just someone, (Y/n)-chan.”

Raising your hand, you held the hand that was set on your cheek and let the pack of peas remove from your face, setting it to the side. Atsumu was not looking at you as his heart was beating ten times faster in his chest, his face red.

You slowly leaned in and rested your forehead against his, squeezing his hand gently.

“Thank you, Atsumu. Who knew you could be sweet as honey?”

You say with a small giggle but as you opened your eyes, Atsumu was staring at you intently. You couldn’t understand what was behind his eyes. You felt his hand gently tuck a strand of your hair behind your ear then he cups your cheek, caressing it with his thumb.

“You look beautiful today, you know?”

“Oh so on other days I look ugly?”

“You always look beautiful. That dress just suits you really well.”

“Well, you got good taste too. You did buy this for me.”

Tension was in the air. You can’t help but stare at his lips. Deep down, you know you like Atsumu in a different light. You were just so afraid to speak your feelings and might ruin the friendship you both have. You were always happy when you get to hang out with Atsumu. He never bores you. You love at how childish he is. You also can’t help but gawk at him every time he plays volleyball. He was in his element. The joy and passion in his eyes and smile.

With the alcohol clouded your mind, you done something that might ruin your friendship. You grabbed Atsumu by the collar and kissed him. Your lips met his, sending sparks into your stomach. His lips tasted like cherry while yours was from the wine. You couldn’t stop. Seconds later, Atsumu kissed you back just as hungrily. He wanted for this happen for so long. He wanted to taste your lips. He wanted to tell you how you beautiful you were everyday. He wanted to take care of you, knowing you were his.

Consumed by the temptation, Atsumu lays you on the couch and continued to kiss you. You ran a hand through his hair with a tug, making him groan into your lips. He let his tongue slip in, making you moan and tug his hair even more. It was music to his ears. Pulling away from you for you to take a breath, he attacked your neck with open mouth kissed then to your jaw which sent shivers to your spine and wrap your arms around his neck. Atsumu cups your head while the wraps around your waist, taking full control.

His kisses felt so good. His kisses were different.

You wanted to turn things around. With all your might, you sat up and settled yourself on his lap, kissing his lips again. Heavy breaths were filling the apartment as you two continued your make out session. All the unspoken feelings between you two were put into action.

The kiss was rough at first but then it transitioned into a soft and gentle one. He doesn’t want for you to be reminded of your ex boyfriend. He wants to treat you like you deserve the whole world. Atsumu softly wraps an arm around your waist and cups your cheek, caressing it as your lips move in sync. He wants his kiss to be meant as loving, not from lust. Your hand suddenly went to Atsumu’s button up shirt but he stops you. Atsumu ran a hand through your hair and wipes your sweat with his jacket that was on the couch as you were breathing heavily.

“You’re drunk, (Y/n)-chan. I don’t want to take advantage of you” he says as he fixed your dress and lets you sit down properly on his lap.

“Right. Sorry.” You say, your face flushed from the intense make out session you two just had. You lean your forehead against his? The both of you treasuring this moment.

“Your fangirls are gonna kill me”

“Ya really had to ruin the moment, huh?”

“Do you like me, Atsumu?” you suddenly slurred, your eyes widening from what you just said. You just wanted to be loved. Genuine love. You suddenly felt weird. You felt a bit dizzy. You felt something warm in your insides that kept going up and up. You held your stomach and covered your mouth. Before Atsumu even got to reply, you quickly ran to the bathroom and kneeled down quickly, vomiting all the contents you ate that night. Your heart pounded harder in your chest. You could the pressure in your head that aches. You went for another round, the bitter taste in your tongue making it worst.

Atsumu enters the bathroom and holds your hair for you, soothing your back as you vomit. As you were finally done, Atsumu helps you up and flushes the toilet. He gives you your toothbrush for you to brush your teeth and let the bitter taste vanish.

After that, Atsumu leads you to your bed, tucking you in.

“‘Tsumu, I’m sorry. Your kissing isn’t bad it’s just the-”

“I know. Don’t worry about it.”

“’Tsumu, can you remove my make up?”

You pleades as you pointed to your side table which on top sits some baby wipes. Atsumu nods with a sigh and sat down on your bed. He then started to wipe off your make up. He felt his heart flutter as your face was now make up free. You were even more beautiful. Hearing your soft snores indicated you fell asleep, making him chuckle. Atsumu leans in and kisses your forehead.

“Sleep well, (Y/n)-chan.”

#haikyuu!!#haikyuu #haikyuu headcanons #haikyuu imagine #haikyuu fluff #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu atsumu #atsumu miya x reader #miya atsumu #miya osamu #atsumu imagines #atsumu x reader #atsumu headcanons

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waitimcomingtoo · 4 years

Text

Missing Link

Pairing: Tom Holland x Reader

Synopsis: Tom can’t find you during the quarantine and the boys are no help. Also, Tom has chickens if you didn’t know

A/n: got this idea from a prank on youtube. Thank you to all that helped me with the plagiarism thing yesterday! Lots of love. Stay safe and healthy ❤️

Masterlist

“Hey, guys. I’m just gonna take out the trash.” You held the trash bag up a little as you alerted the four boys in the living room as to what you were doing. Harry, Harrison, and Tuwaine did not look up from the video game they were playing, but Tom gave you a gentle smile and reached for your hand.

“Okay, Princess.” He squeezed your hand before returning to his game as you walked out of the house.

“Damn.” Harry mumbled once you left.

“What?” Tuwaine asked, neither of them taking their eyes off the video game.

“She said she was taking out the trash.” Harry pointed out.

“Yeah, and?” Tom asked, gripping the controller angrily when he lost.

“She forgot Harrison.” Harry sighed.

“This is why people say Sam is the cute twin.” Harrison grumbled.

“Die.” Harry deadpanned as he focused on the game. Tom and Tuwaine exchanged looks as Harrison gave Harry the side eye.

An hour later, the boys were growing listless with their game. Harrison put his controller down and rubbed his aching eyes.

“Alright, I’m starving. Let’s eat.” He rubbed his hands together and walked into the kitchen.

“Me too, mate.” Tuwaine tossed his controller onto the couch and joined Harrison in the kitchen.

“Let me get Y/n and we’ll have some lunch.” Tom said as he walked into the bedroom where he assumed you’d be.

“Are you hungry, baby doll?” He asked, frowning when he didn’t see you in there. He walked to the connected bathroom, but the door was wide open and you weren’t inside. Confused as to where else you would be, he checked the rooms one by one, starting his Harrison’s and ending with Tuwaine’s. When you didn’t show up in any of them, he began to get worried. He went down to the basement and yelled down the stairs.

“Y/n?” He called your name and got no answer. “Hello?”

He went down the steps and looked all around the room, but you weren’t there either. He stopped for a moment to scratch his head. He knew you weren’t in the kitchen or common area because that’s where he had been. And he knew you weren’t in the bedrooms because he had just checked them. The house wasn’t big enough for you to not hear him calling your name, and he feared that meant you weren’t inside.

Tom padded back to the kitchen where the other three boys were eating various forms of lunch.

“Guys, where’s Y/n?” Tom asked as he reached the kitchen counter. All he received as a response was a series of shrugs.

“I don’t know. Haven’t seen her.” Harry said as he put the finishing touches on his sandwich.

“I haven’t seen her either.” Tuwaine added, stealing half of Harry’s sandwich.

“I thought she was taking out the trash?” Harrison recalled.

“Yeah, that was over an hour ago.” Tom began to worry even more. He’d been so caught up in the game, he didn’t even realize you never came back into the house. The common area was in the middle of the front and back door. He would’ve heard or seen you had you come back inside.

“Maybe the chickens ate her.” Harrison shrugged as he took a bite of his food. Tom snapped out of his worried state to glare at Harrison.

“Don’t be a div, Haz. Chickens don’t eat people.” Tom snapped, growing frustrated as none of the boys took the situation seriously. He leaned back on the kitchen counter and stretched, blowing out a nervous breath.

“These are weird times, man.” Harrison defended. “Don’t you think they get tired of corn and seeds sometimes?”

Harry nodded along as if Harrison said something of substance, stopping when Tom shot him a look.

“No I don’t, because they have brains the size of walnut. And apparently, so do you.” Tom huffed. He ran his fingers through his hair and gave it a stressful tug.

“Let’s not turn on each other, guys.” Harry warned as he sensed tension rising.

“He’s right. It’s what the chickens want.” Tuwaine said knowingly and Tom gave him a long, angry glare.

“I’m leaving.” He declared as the boys snickered amongst themselves. He stormed into your shared bedroom and looked around again, hoping to find this there this time.

“Princess?” Tom called as he looked behind the door. “Are you in here?”

He sighed in defeat when he didn’t find you once again. He went through the same routine of checking Harry’s room, then Harrison’s, then Tuwaine’s.

“Y/n? Where are you?” Tom called, his voice echoing off the walls. When he got no reply, he impatiently licked his lips and took out his phone. He called you, sighing angrily when he got no answer. He tapped his foot as he waited to leave a message.

“Hey, sweetheart, it’s me. I’m worried about you. Please give me a ring when you get this. I love you, bye.” He left you a voicemail, trying to keep his voice calm as he spoke to you. He put his phone back in his pocket and returned to the kitchen, empty handed.

“She’s not here. I checked all the rooms in the house. She’s just not here.” Tom said in exasperation. He had no idea how he managed to lose you during a nationwide lockdown.

“Relax, mate. She’s probably went on a walk.” Harrison offered some helpful insight.

“But we always go on our walks together.” Tom whined like a child.

“Or maybe she just needed some alone time.” Harry suggested. “The poor girl is trapped in this house with four boys and nowhere to go. She probably needed some air.”

“I saw her talking to a lady bug the other day just for some female interaction.” Tuwaine commented.

“Okay. You’re probably right.” Tom decided to believe in the best case scenario. “She’s just on a walk.”

All the boys, including Tom, nodded in a agreement that you were just on a walk. After a beat of silence, Tom let out a whine.

“How long is this walk!” He exclaimed. The boys exchanged looks as Tom pulled out his phone.

“Hi angel. It’s me again.” He let out a shaky breath. “I’m scared somethings happened to you. Please ring me as soon as you get this. I miss you. Bye.”

He stared at his phone for a minute, hoping your name would light up on his screen. When it didn’t, he sighed sadly and put it away.

“Guys, I’m really worried now. I haven’t seen Y/n in three hours.” He licked his lips again, his mouth feeling dry with fear.

“Relax, Tom. She’s gotta be somewhere around here. She legally has to be.” Harry insisted.

“I’ve checked every room in the house. Twice! Where the hell did she go?” He asked in exasperation. He looked to the boys for answer but they had nothing to give him.

“Maybe every time you come into the room, she leaves it swiftly and quietly.” Harrison moved his hand like he was painting a picture.

“Like a gentle breeze.” Tuwaine whispered right in Toms ear, who flinched away.

“Why would she do that?” Tom asked in confusion.

“To avoid you.” Harry shrugged as he sipped his tea.

“Maybe she’s playing Hide and Seek.” Harrison pointed at Tom like he had a brilliant revelation.

“Or tag.” Tuwaine added.

“Why would she start a game of Hide and Seek without telling me?” Tom groaned at their incompetence.

“Or tag.” Tuwaine repeated.

“Did she expect me to just assume we were playing?” Tom asked, half humoring their ridiculous theories.

“Yes. You’ve never playing Surprise Hide and Seek with someone?” Harrison scoffed at Tom. Tom looked at his friend like he was crazy.

“Whats Surprise Hide and Seek?” Harry piped up. Tom felt the real issue slipping away from the conversation.

“It’s like regular Hide and Seek but it’s a surprise because you didn’t know you were playing it.” Harrison explained and Tom gripped the countertop in frustration.

“I highly doubt Y/n is playing Surprise Hide and Seek.” He said through a fake smile.

“Well we still have the chicken theory.” Harrison reminded the boys. Harry and Tuwaine nodded as Tom gave them a searing glare.

“We do not have the chicken theory! Chickens do not eat people! For Christ’s sake.” Tom slapped the countertop.

“We don’t know that Tom! We don’t know anything about chickens.” Harrison exclaimed. “Maybe the chickens saw you eating chicken and decided to get revenge. You named the chicken Predator, and now it ate your girlfriend. That’s on you!”

“I didn’t name the chicken Predator!” Tom shouted back.

“That was me.” Tuwaine raised his hand. “And leave Predator out of this. If he killed Y/n, it’s because he caught her slipping.”

“Have you all lost your minds?” Tom yelled at the bunch.

“Yes.” They said in unison. Tom was dumbfounded at this and seemed to space out. The boys stared at him in confusion as he stared off. Harry waved a hand in front of Toms face, and he didn’t blink.

“What are you doing?” Harry asked nervously.

“I’m counting to 10 in my head.” Tom stated catatonically. “Whew. Okay. I’m calm. Now if you’ll excuse me, I have to go find my girlfriend.” He spun on his heel but didn’t even get a step forward when he heard Harrison’s voice.

“Might want to check the chicken co-“ Harrison stopped his sentence when he saw the crazed look in Toms eyes.

“Finish that sentence.” Tom dared him.

“I don’t want to.” Harrison mumbled in fear.

“But I’m asking you to. Finish that sentence. Don’t be shy.” Tom said again, staring Harrison down. They looked into each other’s eyes for a moment, the tension building.

“Might want to check the chicken coop.” Harrison said quickly.

“I’ll kill you.” Tom lunged forward but Harry and Tuwaine held him back. Tom relaxed and fixed his shirt, clearing his throat as he nodded to the boys to signal that he was ready to behave.

“I’m just scared, guys.” Tom sighed as his frustration turned into sadness. “And none of you are taking this seriously! Something could’ve happened to her. She could be hurt or lost or scared.”

“Or on a walk.” Harry tried to reason with his brother as he got back on the couch to play video games.

“What if she’s not?” Tom protested. “What if someone took her?”

“Have you tried calling her?” Tuwaine asked.

“No Tuwaine. I sent her a letter asking where she was. I sent it to her via a carrying pigeon. We’ll have an answer in 3 to 5 business days.” Tom snapped in sarcasm. Tuwaine held his hands up in defense and Tom immediately felt bad.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to snap, I’m just worried about her. I’ll give her another call.” Tom said as he pulled out his phone to ring you. He got your voicemail again and sighed. “Y/n, baby, please ring me back. I’m dying here. I need to see you and make sure you’re all right. Ring me, please.”

Harrison and Tuwaine gave him sympathetic looks, finally grasping how worried he was. Tom shook his head and took a seat next to Harry on the couch.

“Harry?” Tom asked quietly.

“Yes?” Harry turned his attention to his brother.

“I think I’m single now.” Tom sighed.

“I’m sorry to hear that, mate.” Harry chuckled at his drama.

“I’m sorry too.” Tom nodded, accepting his fate as a single man.

“Hey, Tom. Hey, Harry.” You walked into the room and took a seat on the couch, turning your attention to the video game on the screen.

“Hey, Y/n.” Harry said without looking up. Tom did a double take at the sight of you, nearly jumping off the couch.

“Where have you been?” Tom practically shouted, making you jump back a little.

“I was taking out the trash.” You laughed a little at his reaction.

“For five hours?” Tom demanded.

“I’m teasing.” You laughed and pulled him closer to you on the couch. “I was pranking you. I’ve been hiding through the house all day while on Instagram live. Look, say hi to the camera.” You showed him your phone and he saw his own confused face on your screen with a couple thousand followers watching.

“Gentle breeze theory wins!” Tuwaine cheered from the kitchen.

“I really thought it was the chickens.” Harrison grumbled from the other side of the room.

“What?” You asked regarding Harrison’s comment.

“I’ll explain later. You mean to tell me you’ve been here all along? And recording it?” Tom asked you in disbelief.

“Yep.” You said proudly. “I had a lot of people tuning in to see how long it’d take you to find me. I figured I’d give you a break once it hit the four hour mark.”

“You didn’t think to check her Instagram?” Harry laughed at his brother for his stupidity.

“You’ve been on live all day?” He couldn’t believe he hadn’t thought to check your Instagram.

“I was on with her at one point.” Tuwaine mentioned and Toms eyes widened as you nodded.

“How’d you even get back in the house? I never saw you come in.” Tom realized, knowing for a fact he would’ve seen you come back inside.

“Climbed through a window.” You shrugged casually.

“Climbed- you climbed through a window!?” Tom exclaimed, making you laugh. He finally laughed as well and pulled you into a hug. He sighed in relief that he had you back before kissing the top of your head. You wrapped your arms around his torso and let him hold you.

“I missed you, princess.” He mumbled into your neck as he cuddled into you. You smiled and squeezed him tightly.

“I was always around the corner.” You told him, kissing his forehead. “I’m sorry I made you worried, baby.”

“It’s okay.” He smiled softly at you. “I’m just glad you’re back.”

“I’m glad too.” You pulled him into a brief kiss. “Now what’s this about chickens?”

Tag List 🏷

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#tom holland x reader #tom holland x you #tom holland fluff #tom holland fanfiction #tom holland imagine #tom holland x yn #tom holland x y/n #peter parker x reader #peter parker imagine #spiderman #tom holland blurb #harry holland x reader #harrison osterfeild x reader #tuwaine #quarantine

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parkerflix · 3 years

Text

skz as: kids i work with

a/n: i work at a daycare center and work in an infant room and it’s a lot of fun but today i was looking at my kids and was like 🤨🤨 imagine skz as you guys and then it’s been in my brain all day anyways will explain ofc!! *slightly changed some names so that way i don’t get @ by their parents if they ever find this HDGVSHSBSN

also!! this is just for funsies it’s not to be taken seriously and i’ve kinda done some picking and choosing of personality traits because they wouldn’t all fit each member! okay yeah

•••

BANG CHAN: AURORA

•okay so

•aurora is literally the oldest out of all my kids (she’s 16 months today!!)

• and she’s very sweet and probably the most calm and happy baby at her age i’ve met in a while

•but

•she can and will scream for no reason and then smile right after

•and that gives me chan vibes bc i so feel like he would do that for funsies

•also

•she’s very much a mothering soul she takes like soft dolls we have and pats their backs and rocks them to sleep

• granted she chucks them across the room after

• but she means well!!

•has a hard time during nap time tho and is a picky eater -.-

•but very much is the sweetest and even tho she can be annoying sometimes very much see chan in her yes yes

MINHO: EMMA

•emma!! she’s the newest addition (joined the class in december!)

•currently the 4th oldest (10 almost 11 months!!)

• okay so emma

•first of all she seems very scared of everything which isn’t rlly minho but her neutral face is very 😐 which i think fits minho pretty well

•also

•the moment you get her warmed up to you?

•THE MOST SMILEY BABY EVER

•she will eat a lot bc she’s growing

•also she’s very clingy to the people she’s closest to

•aka minho with his cats as he should.

• she also has a hard time with nap time 🙄‼️ these older mfs i swear

•anyways once she’s asleep she’s so cute

•cheeks!! and puffs them out too!!

•honestly she’s pretty quiet she makes sounds when she wants you to pay attention to her

CHANGBIN:JAYDEN

•BUE I LITERALLY SAW THIS AS SOON AS I BEGAN TO THINK ABOUT THIS

•ok so u know how people when they first see changbin are like “omg so scary!! he looks very angry omg nooo” but as soon as he opens his mouth they go ♡´･ᴗ･`♡

•basically thats jayden

•he is second youngest!! (7 months)

•he’s bald except for little bits of hair not related just wanted to mention he’s part of the bald twins

•when he first started he cried a lot and was very grumpy and i feel like for the longest time that’s how people viewed changbin

•SIKE THO as soon as jayden started crawling mf is the biggest smiler and so funny

•and if that isn’t changbin idk what is tbh

•jayden just started solid food and his reactions are PRICELESS.

•tried blackberry yesterday,, was not a fan

•paris pls ur getting off track

•anyways, he clocks out so easy and he’s pretty laid back

•very funny baby,, also can be loud when he wants but for the most time he’s pretty calm and just roams around the room

HYUNJIN: RILEY

•I ALSO SAW THIS ONE AS SOON AS I THOUGHT ABOUT THIS

•riley!! middle baby (9 months!!)

• she makes my heart go woosh! i adore her to pieces

•no i didn’t pick my favorite kid for my ult noooo

•JDGSSJSJHS the favoritism.

•anyways

•riley is super sweet!

• although she’s really sensitive too ):

•and everyone knows that hyunjin is sensitive pls be kind to my boyfriend): HDGSHS

• also??

•their laughs? so sweet and pure

•very dramatic too omg

•today riley didn’t wanna sit on the floor when i grabbed her out of her crib after she woke up from her nap and proceeded to scream and fake cry at me

•...she got what she wanted

•also sleeps horribly and won’t take her bottles...

•but makes up for it by being the biggest sweetheart and just is always smiling at people and is so infectious to be around love her

•even tho she sneezed in my face today

JISUNG: SHAUN

•SO

• shaun is also 9 months!!

• him and jisung have the cutest chubby cheeks ):

•also their smiles ? 10/10

• although did base this off of their personalities

•shaun is very overactive and is just like always talking and always around everyone

•very jisung like!!

•also another funny kid they make me laugh

•can make the other babies laugh too

•when frustrated will either verbalize it or you can just see his mood change

•probably the one i spend the least amount of time with bc he’s always moving around and he sleeps a lot

• has nothing to do with the fact that he spits up everywhere and i hate when he spits up on me

FELIX: EMILY

•em!!!

•she’s the youngest of the group (7 months today!!)

• she is probably the cuddliest of the group

•will let you hold her forever if you want

•is a very happy baby

• her smile?? unparalleled.

• is literal sunshine

•everyone in the center knows who em is!!

• also another of my favorites although i love all of them

• she is so relaxed and she does everything to 100%

•very stubborn and determined

•currently trying to stand up and will spend all day trying

•reminds me of felix and his determination

• goes down easily for a nap and wakes up smiling most of the time

•can also be sensitive

•most of the kids kinda underestimate her bc she’s small and bc she can’t walk yet but she holds her ground!!!

•very felix like in that sense

SEUNGMIN: KNOX

•BIGGEST PUPPY EVER!!

•turned 1 on uh... SATURDAY.

•very energetic when he’s not like exhausted

•also super talkative when he’s comfortable with you??

•very gucci flip flops kid

•although he screams constantly

•but we move on from that bc seungmin would to that just to be funny too...

•omg yk seungmin going “STA” when the balloon fell and how i died laughing okay anyways

•knox basically is that moment but embodied

•he’s funny and so sweet

•will cuddle you and give you the biggest laugh and smile every when he’s happy

•tbh knox’s laugh reminds me of like a gerber baby laugh or the sun from the teletubbies

•anyways i digress.

JEONGIN: ELIJAH

•so eli is 13 months!

•very much reminds me of jeongin bc they’re both young but old

•like jeongin is my age.... and he’s super successful.. and i’m writing this...

•anyways

• like he’s young?? but also old compared to the younger ones???

•eli is the baby of his family and it translates into the classroom too my coteachers tend to baby him

•and sometimes when he’s cranky he doesn’t mind

•like jeongin

•but is currently trying to move past that

•and kinda be seen as the toddler he is

•or adult in jeongin’s case!!

•smiles and laughs are so precious

•always best outfits of sweats and a cute sweater

•definitely when he’s older will give jeongin a run for his money on the #OOTD shshshs

• tbh when he’s super sleepy he gets kinda super sensitive

•once when he was in that mood i said one thing to him and he burst into tears and then passed out sleeping

• i told him broccoli.

•anyways he’s funny too

and this concludes skz as kids in my room/ i work with/ the ones i see the 40 hours a week i spend at work.

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