#I often feel like I’m only a reflection of what I think I should be for people and it’s nice to just. Not live like that

[ponderingmoonlight]

Satoru Gojo purposely keeping the scar you gave him instead of using reversed technique

Pairing: husband! Gojo x reader

Word Count: 1,6k

Synopsis: When his skin gets busted by your sheer excitement, it doesn't feel right to Satoru to use his reversed technique and simply heal.

Warnings: fluff fluff fluff, Yuji's "death" scnene in season 1, blood lol

Thank you dear anon for aggressively reminding me that it's canon for Gojo to not have any scars, it really helped me cooking up that fic! 🤍

Every step feels like hell, the only thing that keeps you from collapsing onto the floor being the reassuring hand of your husband on your shoulder.

This can’t be true, it’s just impossible. Yuji Itadori was a member of Jujutsu High for a few weeks, just started to get to know this world better. This was supposed to be an easy mission, the three of them should have made it out alive with ease. But apparently, Sukuna decided to show up. And apart from injuring Megumi, he violently took Yuji’s life by ripping his heart out. A heart made of pure gold, a heart so precious that you couldn’t help but care for that boy the minute you saw him.

But now he’s dead.

Your hands start shaking immediately the minute you step into this cursed room you visited far too often, gazing at Yuji’s body covered by a cloak. This isn’t a bad dream. No, the blood covering the white cloak tells you more than urgently that Yuji Itadori isn’t there anymore.

“Please tell me that there’s a chance he’ll come back”, you mutter.

Oh, how much both Shoko and Satoru hate to see you like that. It’s not a secret to anyone at Jujutsu High how deeply you care about your students, loving them like your own children. Of course, this isn’t the first time you’ve seen a student die in front of your eyes. In times like these, jujutsu sorcerers pass away like flies. But Satoru knows what you’ve seen in Yuji, that he somehow reflected parts of yourself. And still, you weren’t able to protect that boy, both Satoru and you coming too late to rescue him.

“I really wish I could, but he shows no signs of life. I’ll move on to autopsy now. If you want to say goodbye…Maybe do it now and leave afterwards.”

Satoru wraps his arms around you just in time before you slide onto the ground, holding you tightly against his chest.

“This is not fair”, you breathe out, head still not able to accept Yuji’s farewell.

He was so young, so full of life. He doesn’t deserve to die, he still had so much ahead of him. There needs to be something you are able to do. Aren’t Satoru or Shoko able to use their cursed technique?

“He didn’t show any signs of life for hours by now, (y/n). Not even Shoko or me are able to bring him back to life. I’m so sorry”, he mumbles against your ear out of nowhere.

So this is really how it ended? With Yuji getting killed by none other than Sukuna himself? Like in trance, your wobbly legs carry you to the autopsy table his lifeless body lays on. You want to stretch out your arm, want to look at that precious boy one last time before Shoko does her job.

But you can’t.

“I can’t look at him”, you blurt out.

With a swift motion, you turn around and burry your face against your husband’s chest.

“It’s okay babe, just look at me, okay? You don’t have to do this.”

Satoru’s arms keep you from losing yourself completely, soak up your falling tears while his head rests against yours. Oh Yuji, you’ll never be forgotten. All the laughter’s both of you shared, his potential, how he always cared about others. You will think about him every time the sun starts to rise, when new students get greeted, when you kill another curse-

“Hey, what’s up? Huh, what are both of you doing here, Gojo-sensei?”

This voice…

That was Yuji Itadori.

Out of instinct you turn around rapidly, not even noticing how the back of your head crushes into Satoru’s forehead with full force. He sees starts, blood taking his sight in an instant while his mind isn’t even able to comprehend it was Yuji who just spoke.

“Yuji! Are you okay? Are you hurt? You’re back!”, you babble out, embracing the boy in a tight hug.

“To be honest I don’t even know what happened last and I’m pretty hungry…Oh, you’re bleeding Gojo-sensei!”

You’re…bleeding? You turn around in confusion, following Yuji’s eyes.

“OMG SATORU!”, you cry out, the sight of your husband covered in his own blood shocking you to your core.

When did that happened…Was it…you?

“I guess you were so happy to see Itadori that you’ve forgot about me standing behind you”, he mutters amused.

“Babe I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to hurt you. I just got so carried away and-“

“Don’t worry about me. Reversed technique, remember? I’ll be whole in seconds. Just look after Yuji, I love you.”

You let out the breath you were holding, the bright smile forming on your gorgeous face making Satoru forget the world around him for a moment. You are so caring, so passionate. And you are his wife.

“I’m a lucky man”, he mutters to himself while pressing the tissue Shoko handed him against his wound.

There you sit, gently caressing Yuji’s cheeks and asking him over and over if he’s okay.

“You really are. This isn’t a problem for you, right?”, Shoko questions with one glance at the laceration on his forehead.

The shocked look on your face replays itself over and over in his mind, lets a chuckle escape his lips. With the help but his reversed technique, it would be way too easy to get rid of that minor wound. Within seconds, there wouldn’t even be a scar left, just his flawless skin. But…it was you who did this to him out of sheer excitement. It sure would be nice to look into the mirror and get reminded of you daily, right?

“Oh, I might as well keep that”, he replies with a sly grin.

- a few weeks later -

You sit on the edge of the couch, desperately waiting for that time of the day. Even after being married to that force of a man for 4 years now, you find yourself getting all excited when he announces that he’s going to shower. Because going to shower means that he’ll come out just wearing boxers with his body still a little wet and his hair sticking to his face in that delicate way.

“Still waiting for me, huh? It’s not like you can see me naked every time you want, babe”, he finally purrs.

Your heart skips a beat. This man…How is it even allowed to look so breathtakingly gorgeous? The way a single droplet of water runs down his cheek, how he gently strokes his damp hair back.

Wait. You squint your eyes a little harder. What is that on his forehead?

“What do you have there?”, you question, rubbing your own hand against the ride side of your forehead.

This almost looks like a scar. But Satoru shouldn’t have scars. After all, he’s able to use reversed technique, healing himself in the matter of seconds. Is it just dirt? No, that definitely looks like scar tissue.

“Oh, it’s nothing”, he immediately tries to brush you off, pulling his hair back into his face.

“No way Romeo, come back here right now”, you demand.

With a swift motion you lift yourself off the couch and hunt after him.

“Is that a scar?”

“It might be…”

“Why didn’t you just heal it? Show it to me!”

When you finally catch him, you slick his hair back again. Only to be greeted what indeed looks like a middle-sized scar. But why and how did this happen, why didn’t he just heal like he usually does?

“You really don’t know where this came from?”, he challenges you.

You blink a few times. What the hell is your husband talking about?

“Why would I know where this came from?”

“Because it was you, (y/n)?”, he playfully bites back.

You? Your mind races, searching for a single moment you ever hurt your husband. You were never really able to even hurt him, no matter how berserk you went in training. When was the last time you even wounded him? But wait, there was this one time you made him bleed, that one time when…

“This was when Yuji woke up-“

“EXACTLY!”, Satoru cries out and gives you a round of applause.

“But why did you keep it? You said you’d be able to heal it…”

“Because I didn’t want to. This scar right here”

Gently, he takes your hand in his and traces the soft scar with your fingertips.

“will always remind me of what a wonderful human being you are.”

Oh. Your eyes turn glossy in an instant, staring up at your loving husband while he gifts you with the most breath-taking smile you’ve ever seen.

“Satoru”, you breathe out.

There is no time to waste. You wrap your longing arms around his tall frame tightly, aiming to never let him go again.

“Every time I look into the mirror, I think about my wonderful wife”, he mutters into your hair.

“Y’know, you could just take a picture of me or something-“

“No. I would rather just keep that scar of my wonderful wife smacking me over a student.”

You hit him playfully over his comment, a giggle escaping your precious lips.

“Come on, it wasn’t like that…”

“I’ll always tell the story like this.”

Tags: @ploylulla @tzubaki @beatrexworld @hellkaiserinphoenix @lauv4chuuya @shadowfoxey @starlightanyaaa @sindela @kayleegomez @sunshine7queen @magalimachete @gatitam @idontknow1123 @creative1writings @sanicsmut  @mynahx3 @sad-darksoul @chilichopsticks @hellkaiserinphoenix @chuyasthighs0 @ynackerman9499 @keepghostly @wxwieeee  @froufrousnowman @tomiokathedepresso  @gojosrealwife  @coffeeluvr96 @mahi-tamashi @weebotaku21 @chaoticwinnercupcake @lees-chaotic-brain  @risuola  @sugurulefttesticle @wordskeeper @baku2345 @polarbvnny @ruixrei @bam-bam-bam-bame-blog @lavenderdrxp@localhehecat @alicerhr @kayleegomez @belovedvamp @wifenanami @chilichopsticks @dlwlrmas-world @oikawarz @darkstarlight82 @satoreo

Dividers by @saradika 🤍

#jjk #jujutsu kaisen #jujutsu kaisen x reader #jjk x reader #jjk gojo #gojo x reader #gojo satoru #gojo saturo #jujutsu gojo #gojou satoru x reader #gojo fluff #jjk fluff #jjk comfort #gojo satoru x reader #gojo x you #jujustu kaisen #jjk satoru #satoru x you #satoru x reader #satoru x y/n #gojo satorou #jujutsu kaisen gojo #gojou x reader #satoru gojo #jujutsu kaisen x you #jjk fanfic #jjk imagines #jujutsu kaisen fanfic #jujutsu sorcerer #gojo's wife

[navybrat817]

The Dad Diaries: Welcome Home

Pairing: Dad!Bucky Barnes x Female Reader

Summary: Bucky reflects on the first night with his son home and puts his thoughts to paper.

Word Count: Over 1.2k

Warnings: Fluff, reflecting, first time dad, slight feels (it's me), Bucky Barnes (he's a warning and a dad, okay?).

A/N: Welcome to The Dad Diaries! This AU will focus on Bucky and his relationship with his son (and you!) ❤️ Thanks to the beautiful @whisperlullaby for giving this intro a look and assuring me it wasn't garbage, but any and all mistakes are my own. Divider by the talented @firefly-graphics . Please follow @navybrat817-sideblog for new fics and notifications. Comments, reblogs, feedback are loved and appreciated!

Bucky stared intently at the open blank journal that sat in the middle of his office desk. He had picked up the pen a few minutes ago, but hadn’t written a single word. Why did he feel stuck? Better yet, what was he thinking by doing this? Reading often came easy to him, but writing? That was something else entirely.

It was also something he wanted to do.

He ran a hand over his face with a sigh and wondered if he should call it a night, crawl into bed with you, and try tomorrow. No, he didn’t want to push it off before he even began. Glancing at the monitor, he heard your voice in his head, a memory of something you told him in the early stages of dating:

The best writing comes from the heart. Write what you and your heart love because no one knows that story better than you.

Bucky had plenty of stories to tell. How he became a hero and a good man after years of pain and darkness. Or how he fell in love with you and became your husband.

And his newest adventure of becoming a father.

He wasn’t sure how to be a dad yet, but he knew he loved his son. That was more than enough to start. And with a smile tugging at his lips, he put the pen to paper.

Hey, Nugget,

My name is James Buchanan Barnes. Most people call me Bucky. Your mom calls me her husband and I’m the luckiest man in the world for that, especially since she gave me the greatest gift I could ever ask for: you.

Your name is James, too. Your mom doesn't know if we’ll call you Jamie or JJ, but I have a feeling you'll hear a bit of both. And one day, I’ll get to hear you call me Dad. Or Dada or Daddy or Papa.

Whatever makes you happy.

He paused in his writing when he thought he heard something on the monitor. His eyes flickered to the screen again and he breathed a little easier when he saw that his baby was still sleeping soundly in the middle of the crib. It wouldn’t stop him from checking on him later, just to be on the safe side.

I’m so glad you’re home. In fact, tonight is your first night in the nursery. I hope you like it here. To quote Ralph Waldo Emerson: “A house is made with walls and beams: a home is built with love and dreams.”

Yeah, your old man likes to read. Maybe you will, too. I even have an original copy of The Hobbit and would love to give it to you when you're older.

Books lined the far wall of Bucky’s office, many of them worn from the amount of times he read them. He made sure Jamie’s room had a reading nook, too. It was one of the only things he asked for when the two of you designed the nursery.

I hope you get enough sleep tonight. Your mom, too. You both did great at the hospital and deserve all the rest you can get.

Would you believe me if I said I was a nervous wreck when I brought your mom in, but tried not to let it show? People call me strong, but I don’t think I ever witnessed true strength until I saw how steady of a rock she was. She blew me away, which didn't surprise me. She amazes me every day.

Hearing your first cry stopped my heart and brought tears of joy to my eyes. After nine months of waiting and talking to your mom’s stomach, you were finally here. And seeing her hold you made me fall in love all over again.

Sorry if that sounds sappy, but it’s true. She looked right at me with happy tears in her eyes and said, “Bucky, look! Look at what we made! It's our little Nugget!” and my heart swelled. She insisted on calling you that and it rubbed off on me. Believe me when I say that you are the luckiest baby in the world to have the mother that you do.

He stopped writing again to glance at his wedding band, smiling all over again. He thought your love filled his heart before, but it overflowed now. It warmed him like nothing else ever could.

You’re probably wondering why I’m writing this since a lot of time will pass by the time you read this. Sometimes I may write to remember things I’m afraid I’ll forget. Other days I’ll write to reflect and get the words out when my mind is too loud. But my hope is that this will be a gift to you.

A bond for the two of us.

As you grow, I’ll fill the pages with the memories of you and our family. I’ll tell you about my past and how it shaped me into the man I am today. How your mom and I met and how I somehow convinced her to fall in love with me. And I’ll be sure to tell you about the day she told me we were going to have you and how that news changed my life for the better.

He swallowed the lump in his throat before he continued.

I also plan to fill this with your milestones. Like your first smile. Is it selfish if I hope to see it first? If not me, your mom. She’d love that. Your first step. Being selfish again, but I hope it’s me you walk toward so I can pick you up and tell you how proud I am. And your first word. I hope it’s Mama.

Though I won’t object if you say Dada.

Bucky chuckled as he imagined the look of betrayal on your beautiful face if your son said “Dada” first instead of “Mama”.

I’m sure some days I’ll have more to say than others. If I’m lucky, I can pass on life lessons and words of wisdom. Some days though I may not say the right thing and I know I’ll stumble along the way as I figure out how to be the best dad to you. I say “best” and not “perfect” because perfection doesn’t exist. Except for you and your mom.

The beauty of it is that I don’t have to go it alone. I’ll have your mom by my side to help guide and protect you and to watch you flourish. And my hope is that you know as you look through the pages how much we love you.

Even on days I may not get it right, I’m your dad, you’re my son, and you’ll always have a home with me and a place in my heart.

I’ll write more when I can, Nugget. Until then, I love you.

Always,

Dad

Bucky set the pen down as he exhaled. It wasn't perfect, but it didn't have to be. It was a start. As long as he put his heart into his words, it would shine from the pages.

And he couldn't wait for all the adventures he’d have with his little Nugget.

I hope you lovelies are excited to take this journey with Bucky. Love and thanks for reading! ❤️

Masterlist ⚓ Bucky Barnes Masterlist ⚓ Ko-Fi

#navybrat writes #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes x female reader #bucky barnes x female!reader #bucky barnes x you #bucky barnes x y/n #bucky barnes x fem!reader #bucky barnes x f!reader #dad!bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes #dad!bucky barnes #the dad diaries #bucky x reader #bucky x female reader #bucky x you #bucky x y/n #bucky barnes fanfiction #bucky barnes fanfic #bucky barnes imagine #bucky barnes au #bucky barnes fic #bucky barnes fan fic #bucky barnes fan fiction #bucky fic #bucky barnes fluff #james buchanan barnes #james bucky barnes #sebastian stan x reader #sebastian stan x female reader #sebastian stan

[suresne]

i’m hesitant to jump into the Kim Discourse but i disagree with statements that boil down his worldview/morality to “kim is a good cop first and foremost, no matter what”

there are so many examples of him doing shit in the game that directly compromises the reputation and aims of the RCM, and not just in a corrupt cop type of way (though there is some of that, obviously)

if kim only cared about being a good cop, why does he go along with harry’s unhinged side missions and whims at pretty much every chance he gets, putting aside the murder investigation? we know that he has “authority off the charts” and could make harry toe the line, but he almost never does. he has a stern affect, but it’s often just for show.

if kim only tolerates/likes harry because he is a detective of the RCM, why does kim clearly get joy from their adventures that have nothing to do with, and even sometimes interfere with, their police work? just because kim says that line to harry about how “an officer of the RCM shouldn’t be on the street” doesn’t mean he necessarily believes, even in the beginning of the game, that harry is only really valuable as a detective of the RCM. he may project that as a value he has adopted, but that doesn’t mean it’s truly how he feels.

kim uses his position in the RCM as a way to distance himself from things that are messy, like politics and emotions. it’s easier for him to say to harry “no RCM detective should be on the street” than “i care about you for some reason i can’t explain and don’t want to see you sleep in the dumpster.” because he’s a pathetic little man who can’t talk about his feelings

i’m not saying that kim isn’t misguided or that his admiration for the RCM isn’t misplaced. because he is, and it is. but making his seemingly unwavering devotion to the RCM the salient aspect of his character at the expense of other things just doesn’t make a lot of sense to me.

also arguing that kim could never grow or be radicalized is doing him a disservice, imo. knowing harry for a week makes kim confront the rigidity of his thinking about reality itself. is it really so strange that he could have the potential to reflect and reevaluate his worldview? the game didn’t make its characters so complex and human for them to remain rigid and unchanging.

#kim kitsuragi #disco elysium #😬 #please don’t yell at me

[ovaryacted]

what about ID Leon (feel like he’d have been a total fuckboy atp as a sort of phase) but what ab he always comes back to you and after a heated argument he fucks you as he’s pressing your face into the mattress while you're crying and clutching the sheets as you’re begging him to let you finish again 🤭

MDNI/18+. NSFW. | cw: Leon is ooc. Possible toxic relationship.

Ooooooo, you’re cooking here anon. Even though I personally don’t headcanon or view Leon as a fuckboy (because let’s face it, that man is not getting laid for the life of him I mean…), let’s go ahead and say he has an ego and it is reflected in his shitty communication skills (cause of anxiety and trauma womp womp).

-

It was a heated moment where Leon accidentally raised his voice at you, mentioning something about not listening to orders on a mission. It was a close call and you had ventured off without Leon’s support, and he kept calm until you were both back home. It first started as a regular conversation until it deviated from Leon not being able to keep you within arm’s reach, to you being too individualistic. You knew why he did this, he was often too worried for his good and you’d always remind him that you could handle yourself even if he didn’t believe you.

“You have to listen to me when we’re out there. Do you know what could’ve happened or do you just not give a shit?”, Leon huffed out a breath, his arms crossing over his chest and shooting daggers at you.

“Well, I’m not you Leon, not all of us think the way you do. The sooner you accept it the better!”, you grew more defiant, more angry for God knows what. The bitterness you felt from Leon always being gone to never listening to you on missions started to fester out of control.

The argument only got more intense, turning into a yelling match between the both of you. Hurtful words were said, things neither of you meant, and with a cruel “Go fuck yourself Leon”, you watched him walk out the door and slam it behind him.

You pissed him off, he pissed you off, but there was nobody else who understood your relationship the way you both did. This wasn’t the first time you two argued either, often happening after you were both stressed out and didn’t find a proper release for it. You couldn’t blame Leon entirely, always being forced to do the government’s bidding and having limited freedom would put anybody on the verge of a breakdown. Being each other’s vices also didn’t help, so it wasn’t surprising when you found Leon knocking on your front door with furrowed eyebrows close to a day later.

He smelled like whiskey, not too much to the point where it was dizzying, but enough to let you know he was drinking. Leon wasn’t there to talk, you knew that much, stuck in a never-ending cycle of adrenaline and unresolved issues.

That was how you found yourself in this position now, face down ass up on the mattress. The things that happened after you welcomed Leon back into the apartment and closed the door behind him were a blur. You remembered him kissing you hard on the mouth, walking you backward towards the bedroom and yanking on your clothes. He wasn’t gentle, not entirely, but when he pulled you forward by the leg as his mouth gravitated towards your cunt, you couldn’t stop him. You didn’t want to.

“Leon…please…”, you could barely speak, barely think, your brain was melting and spilling out of your ears along with the rest of you. You couldn’t bring yourself to care about the consequences and how this might seem. Always fighting with this man just to end up back in bed with him was something you should be embarrassed about. But with the way he was pummeling into you, it was easier to forgive him.

“Just shut up”, he muttered under his breath, fucking into you harshly from behind and focusing on the way your walls pulsed around his cock. He was relentless, moving in an aggressive push-and-pull that hadn’t stopped since he crossed the threshold of your front door. The back of his hand grabbed onto your head, pushing your face against the mattress and making you release a muffled whimper.

You hid your face in the bed, tears slipping down your cheeks and your fingers digging into the sheets. Maybe this was what you deserved, to be tested constantly so Leon could come back home, back to you.

“Quit your fucking whining, I’ll let you cum”, Leon didn’t stop, knowing you were on the verge of cumming all over him for the umpteenth time. No matter how mad he was at you at the moment or how badly you pissed him off, he would let you cum however many times you could.

Sometimes you hated him for it, how he could play your body like a violin and pull every string taut until it snapped. He drained you, he stressed you out, but you still gave yourself willingly every time because that’s what made him stay.

This was how he liked you. Pliant and taking what he had to give. That was all you could do, because no matter what, Leon always came back to you.

#leon kennedy smut #leon kennedy x reader #leon kennedy x you #leon kennedy imagine #leon kennedy #leon scott kennedy #leon s kennedy #resident evil #resident evil x reader #resident evil smut #ovaryacted asks

[dionvsian]

theodore nott meeting the hogwarts cool girl !!

theodore nott x fem!reader (she/her pronouns)

warnings: reader smokes cigarettes (srry if it makes you uncofortable!).

little note: back to writing! i used to have a blog here and i made the dumbest decision to delete it (i'll forever miss you timothée chalamet's fake instagram posts)

reblogs are appreciated 😁

“are you always this late?” he looked down, studying your face. You could see him taking in every single detail. as he did so, he lifted an eyebrow and waited for your reply. a small smirk played with the corner of his mouth. the kind of smirk you see someone do when they feel they are superior towards you. he did not know your name, at least not yet.

your silence caused him to continue: “I am theo. and you are?"

"I'm y/n"

"pleased to meet you y/n. my father always said that a name should mean something. it should reflect the person being named"

"i'm not really sure what my name means, but i hope is something nice!"

"are you a pure blooded witch?"

"yep" you say nodding

he seems satisfied with your answer. as if you somehow passed a test without even knowing it. he holds his hand out and introduces himself with a slight bow.

"i would say you look like an angel from heaven, but you look more like some punk girl who has trouble getting to class on time"

"i wasn't planning on going to class rn"

“oh! uhm, that can get you into trouble. you know.” he says. then he adds: “are you always so bold? it’s kind of cute.”

"i'm not bold, i'm just me"

he lets out a chuckle. "it’s the same thing. I’m guessing you are just very confident in yourself, hm?” he tilts his head a little and looks down at you. “it’s not a bad quality, and I suppose it makes for a good quality of a friend, don’t you think?”

"yeah maybe"

“you are not the quiet type, I bet. you are the one who likes to get things done.” he smiles, and leans in close to you. "you would do anything to achieve your goal. you must be one of the most popular girls at school. i bet many boys try to ask you out.” and he waits for you to respond. there is a glint in his eye as he stares at you, studying you.

a soft blush spreads on your cheeks "maybe... do you want to join them?" you say flirtatious

he smiles and leans closer, he is just a few inches away from you. you can feel the heat of his breath coming from his lips as he smiles.

“maybe I do.”

he waits for you to respond, just looking at your face, smiling. he is amused at the way you're blushing. but you cannot tell what the reason for that is. does he find you attractive? or does he find you a fool? he seems to be enjoying this a little too much, as you cannot tell what the outcome of this conversation will be.

you look up at him, since he is a bitt taller but you only gives a satisfied smirk

he is enjoying this attention he thinks. he leans in even closer to you and whispers in your ear.

"what are you thinking about right now?”

you let out some of the air that was inside your lungs "to be honest, I was thinking of smoking some cigarettes and painting my nails"

"you’re a naughty girl then. do you smoke cigarettes often?" he asks this in a way that implies he actually cares about the answer to the question. as if smoking cigarettes is a bad thing. or it's not?

"yeah, but don't tell anyone, ok? it will be our secret"

he seems amused by your response. he smiles and whispers again. this time his voice is even quieter

“a secret.” he whispers the last word and he has this smile on his face that says it is not a normal secret. the look on his face gives her the impression he thinks of something not entirely appropriate. “how many cigarettes are you planning to smoke today alone?”

"3? i'm not really sure"

again, he gives you this amused smile, and it seems he is actually a bit impressed. he is not used to seeing someone not care about the rules like she does.

“well, they say you gotta try everything once. you must get into trouble a lot. aren’t you afraid of detention?”

"no, plus I never get caught anyways". you say and smile for him "do you smoke?"

he seems surprised at the question. he shakes his head and says. “no, I have never smoked. my father makes sure i take care of my health. but he doesn’t say anything about my friends. I suppose you would have to hide it from him?” “how does it feel to smoke? will it feel good to try it for first time?”

"I don't want to be a bad influence for you" you chuckle "so I won't answer"

he seems to actually be thankful. as if you just saved him from doing something bad.

"thank you. If I start smoking today. I’s your fault though!” he laughs. then he asks. “what else do you do that is bad? or am I the only person that deserves to know about this side of you?”

he seems curious and even though the smile on his face remains as teasing as ever. you can see the look on his face is genuine. as if he actually wants to know about you more.

"talking about bad habits isn't exactly a good way to get to known someone new"

he laughs again. you notice how good his laugh is. he seems to do it a lot lately. he leans in again. you can smell his cologne when you get this close. “so, you are afraid I might judge you or something?”

he gives you a playful look and then adds: “i already said you were cute. so being a little naughty, does not make you any less cute." he says this playfully, and you can see that smile on his face again. he seems to enjoy teasing you.

you back on a wall of the corridor "it will affect your impression of me" but your heart skips a beat when he calls you cute

he seems to be enjoying the way you are backing up against the wall. as he can still clearly see just how pretty you are. he smiles at you, this time you can feel he is being genuine about the compliment. he gets closer to you though. he really thinks he is in charge here doesn't he?

“well, it only makes me want to know more about you. a girl who smokes cigarettes and isn't afraid of trouble... is a very rare breed these days.” he looks you up and down again. but this time with pure admiration.

"why don't you tell me what are y thinking abt?"

"you really are interested in me aren’t you?” he laughs after saying this. h thinks for a few seconds. he seems to be contemplating whether or not to disclose his thoughts to you.

"fine, I’ll tell you my thoughts. but you better not tell anyone else. I don’t want to lose my reputation.” he takes a deep breath. you can see he is nervous, and he is blushing a little.

he leans in closer and whispers in your ear "i’m wondering if you have ever kissed anyone before.”

he waits for you to respond, the same look on his lips. you sense a bit of smugness in his voice, as if he is convinced you have never kissed anyone before.

"of couse i did".

he seems surprised, and gives you a look. it’s the look a person gives you, when they know they are not in charge. you just gained a lot of power and superiority over him just now.

"what about you? have you ever kissed someone?"

he smiles, his cheeks are red now, and his whole face is blushing.

"y-yea I have.” he says it as if it’s difficult for him to admit it. your response seemed to have knocked him off his feet. his eyes are fixed to the floor, as if he is trying to decide what to do next.

you decide to shoot your shot being flirtatious"do you wanna kiss me?"

he looks up and seems shocked. he blushes even more as you say this, his cheeks are as red as a beet now. your confidence has made him completely speechless. he whispers so only you can hear his voice, while also pulling you closer into him. "may I?”

"yeah"

he leans in and gently kisses you on the lips. It’s sweet and gentle but very passionate. you notice just how soft his lips are.he is blushing as you kiss, and so do you. his lips are soft and smooth, you feel them against yours and you find the experience very calming and pleasant.

you place your hand on his cheek and they get even redder, as he continues to hold his lips against yours. he enjoys the kiss very much.

he breaks the kiss after a bit and looks at you. "that was nice.” a broad smile was on his lips. he looks so happy and full of life. you can see all the tension fall away as his shoulders slowly relax.

"well, i have to go to class now"youi say and unlean from the wall" see you" and you start walking away

"wait.” he calls out when you are already half way on your way to the potions class. "you are not telling anyone are you?”he still has that smile on his face and you can see that he wants to continue this conversation. he seems hooked to knowing more about you. He is obsessed. he wants to know what that "cool girl" energy of yours looks like, and how far you are willing to take things with him.

"of course not. i dont wanna be seen with the spoiled playboy theodore nott" you say and get into your classroom, not giving him the chance to say anything else.

he watches you leave. he is completely flabbergasted and speechless. he is not used to girls treating him like this. he has not noticed this side of you. theo is completely in love now. you are beautiful and mysterious in his eyes. he feels like he got a peek behind the curtains. a private performance.

he watches you leave and then continues to the potions classroom. he is lost in his thoughts, trying to piece together why you acted in the way you just did. you are not like any other girl he knows in Hogwarts. and he wants to know more.

#theodore nott #theodore nott x reader #theodore nott x you #theodore nott x y/n #theodore nott x fem!reader #theo nott #theo nott x reader #theo nott x y/n #theo nott x you #theo nott x fem!reader #hogwarts #cool girl #alexa chung #lorenzo zurzolo #harry potter #theodore nott imagines #theo nott imagines #theodore nott fluff #theo nott fluff #coolgirl!reader

[malarign]

crybaby

(when they find you crying)

contains: bf!maknaeline x gn!reader | genre: angsty fluff | tw! crying obv, kissing, low self esteem, appearance insecurities, burn out, stress, lmk if i missed anything! | wc:

reblogs are highly appreciated!

author’s note: sorry it took so long, but i’ll try to post more often now! 😼 also big thank you to @odxrilove for beta reading!

for hyung line version go here!

Kim Sunoo | 김선우

Looking from your computer screen to the window you felt dizzy. All those hours you spent trying to write something that made sense weren’t as productive as you thought they would be. You just stared at your short story helpless, no sensible thoughts came to your mind, causing a few tears to form in your eyes.

Closing your laptop harshly, you hid your face in the palms of your hands and sobbed loudly. Your cries brought attention to Sunoo who’s been busy preparing some warm meal for both of you. He kind of knew something was wrong - you seemed exceptionally stressed and nervous the whole day so he waited patiently for some reaction from you. He ran up to your room, leaving the stove turned off.

He saw you shaking slightly with every sob, sitting quite uncomfortably in front of your now closed computer.

“Sweetheart?” He watched how your head shot up at the nickname. He tried to send you a comforting smile, but at the sight of him you teared up even more. “Hey, what’s going on?” he asked, gently stroking your hair.

You brought your form closer to him, trying to find comfort in his hug, but even that didn’t seem to help.

“I feel so bad,” you stuttered out. “I don’t feel it anymore, I don’t know how to write,” you cried bitterly.

“What do you mean? You love writing,” he tried to understand, especially since nothing pointed to your sudden burnout.

“I feel like I’m getting lost in between all those words, and I’m so scared, Sunoo. I know nothing apart from writing, it’s my whole life. But now I’m not able to rig up at least one good sentence or even a phrase.”

He felt how a stain of your tears on his T-shirt became bigger and bigger with your every word. He wished he knew how to help you, but none of you truly imagined a moment like this. Writing and storytelling has been your passion for the longest time, he loved every single one of them and always wondered how you were able to give utter to your stories so beautifully.

“Maybe, try to rest for a while,” he said after thinking for a while. “Don’t you think you’ve been pushing yourself a bit too much lately? Burnout doesn’t mean your passion is completely gone, but that you should prioritize yourself now.”

He felt how you nodded slowly. You pulled away from him to wipe your face. Cupping them he planted a sweet peck on your nose and forehead earning a small smile from you.

Yang Jungwon | 양정원

Looking in the mirror you almost didn’t recognize the person who stood in its reflection. They looked at you but at the same time it wasn’t you. Then why did everything tell you this is how you looked?

Without noticing it tears started cascading your cheeks in hot pathways. Your body was far from perfect and you knew it damn well. How could you do that to yourself? How could you neglect your body like this?

Trying to calm down before your boyfriend Jungwon would come back home from work you fanned your face with your palms in hope it would stop your tears from overflowing, but it was self-defeating. It only made you cry harder, disgusted at the thought of him having to bear with you.

“Y/n?” His voice brought your attention. You turned around to face him with tears-stained cheeks and his face grew completely pale. “Y/nie…” he cooed and stepped closer to you.

When he almost had you in his arms you took a few steps back. He looked at you confused, tilting his head in question.

“Do you love me, Jungwon?” you asked once your sobs calmed down a bit.

He froze at his spot, not knowing what hurt him more - you questioning his feelings or the state you were in.

“Of course I love you. So much, Y/n.” You looked down at his words. “Did I do something wrong?”

“No, no of course you didn’t.” You were quick to respond.

“Then what’s wrong? Why are you crying?” he asked and extended his arm to you. You took his hand hesitantly and he pulled you to him, engulfing you in a comforting hug. “You know you can tell me everything.”

“Why?” you asked, facing him and watched how confusion painted his face again. “Why do you even love me? I’m not pretty, I’m not as talented as you are, I’m not an interesting person at all, so why are you interested in me?” Tears started spilling down your cheeks, but Jungwon was quick to wipe them with a gentle smile.

“My lovely, the thing is I disagree with everything you just said. To me you’re the most beautiful, talented and interesting person I know. I love you for everything and you have no idea how I wish you could see yourself from my point of view. Then you would love yourself just like I love you,” he said, playing with your hair in the meantime.

Looking at his eyes apart from his love for you you saw sincerity, both brought smile to your face again, forgetting about those thoughts for a while.

Nishimura Riki | 西村力

Riki stared at the screen of his phone, waiting for any response from you. It’s been an hour or two since your exam ended, yet there was no message from you saying how it went. The lack of it already told him everything, but the silence from your end made him sick to his stomach.

He finally reached your apartment and quietly opened the front door. Usually he made sure you knew he came over, being loud and cracking jokes just from the moment he stepped inside. Today was different though. He knew what awaits him and prepared for the high possibility of dealing with your sadness. He peeked inside, looking for you and trying to hear any sound of sobs coming from inside. And he indeed heard some sniffles coming from your room along with your playlist for crying.

He took off his shoes and quietly opened the door, minding that at a certain point they creak pretty loudly. The sight made his heart drop. You were laying on your bed with eyes completely red from crying, trying to stop more tears from flowing down.

“Y/nie,” Riki called your name bringing your attention. You tried to smile but finally seeing him made you feel more emotional and embarrassed at your total failure. He sat at the edge of your bed, covering your body with a blanket. Cupping your cheek, he rubbed it with his thumb wiping the lonely tear along the way. “Let me make you your favorite tea, how does that sound?” he asked and was about to stand up when you firmly grabbed his wrist.

“Can you stay here instead?” you asked in a low voice that threatened to crack at any moment.

“Of course,” he responded almost immediately.

He laid down next to you and let you nestle up to his warm body. You tried to calm down for a long time now, but nothing worked as good as his sweet voice murmuring soft confessions to your ear and the comforting scent of his perfume.

“Do you want to talk about it?” he asked but you shook your head against his chest. “Do you want to watch something then? We could watch Tangled for example,” he suggested.

You slowly raised your head showing him the biggest puppy eyes and pout you were able to put. He chuckled at your obsession with the animation and reached for your laptop to search for it.

“I love you, baby, and I’m so proud of you,” he said against your forehead in between soft pecks he planted on it.

thank you for reading! back to the masterlist

taglist: (open) @nicholasluvbot, @en-chantedtomeetyou, @skzenhalove, @nfrgirl, @kpoprhia, @redm4ri, @jaelaxies, @yenqa, @heesitation

#kflixnet #enhanet #enhypen #enhypen imagine #enhypen fluff #enhypen fic #enhypen headcanons #enhypen drabbles #enhypen x reader #enhypen x you #enhypen x y/n #enhypen sunoo #sunoo fic #sunoo headcanons #sunoo x reader #enhypen jungwon #jungwon headcanons #jungwon x reader #jungwon drabbles #niki enhypen #niki headcanons #niki drabbles #niki x reader #niki fluff

[lovelyyandereaddictionpoint]

Yandere Imposter: Neige LeBlanche

He’s the shining crewmate in cyan

With a reputation of snow

He’s innocent in any situation 

There's always an out 

Even if he’s found with blood splashed on his suit

He’s nothing but an unfortunate witness traumatized beyond belief

So traumatized he can’t recall who it was

Until its most convenient

“I-i’m so sorry everyone…I witness something so horrible the least I should do is be able to help…I-i’ll try my best for everyone.”

So it's best if he travels with you

The crewmate so determined to find the imposter

Or even the unconvinced crewmate who keeps giving him the side-eye

So why don’t you pair up with him?

Despite his flawless alibi, overwhelming lack of evidence, and testimony from trusted crewmates your friends

Somehow he can’t get you close enough

wHy ARe yOu BeINg sO dIfFiCUlt!?

At this rate, he’ll the imposter have to kill the whole crew before you give him anything but a passing gaze glare

But he’s a good crewmate liar

You’ll have no choice but to believe him when they eject the ‘real’ imposter:

You stared through the impact glass at the vastness of the space and the decreasing figure of the purple suit. A haze of finality and unreaching, endlessness ebbing your resolve, you tightened your fists; digging your nails into your palms. It hardly did much to distract you from the feeling in your heart but you’d take what you could.

“(Y/n), Rook set a course back to Innersloth…we’re going home.”

You ignored him, not even bothering to look at his worried reflection behind you, keeping your eyes on the spot you last found the supposed imposter’s floating body. The news brought nothing but guilt and rage. At who? You, the remaining crewmates, the dead, Neige? Even with the evidence pointing to your dearest friend and the innocence proclaimed to him you couldn’t ignore the feeling in your gut. 

The same one that told you to stay with your friend, even when he insisted you two split up for just a second. The same push that had you doubting the one in cyan from the very beginning. Even with his innocence being proven every time without fail, you couldn’t disregard the compass that held tried and true for this whole nightmare.

“(Y/n), maybe you should join me in the cafeteria! I recently made a pie for everyone to enjoy!”

“...Not everyone.”

Neige stiffened before letting his eyes and lips curve into a smile as he shed a tear. 

“You’re right *sniff* Not for everyone…but maybe in their honor?”

You resisted the urge to sneer at him. That voice. That face. Those tears. He was doing it again! Whether it was acting or mimicry it didn’t sit right with you; it never did. And even now in the wake of the majority of your crew’s death, it didn’t incur the empathy he so often elicited from onlookers. In your deepest of hearts you rationalized that was why he seemed so insistent on trying his tactics on you. 

“You can enjoy it without me…who’s to say the imposter really is off the ship anyway?”

At those words he made a face, puckering his lips and folding his hands to protest. You spoke, glaring at the despicable reflection of yourself in the window.

“ We’ve been wrong before. What’s to say we aren’t again?”

“B-but nothing has been broken! And we’ve split up many a time before and none of us have died! Don’t you think that means we finally got rid of the—”

“Imposter? Please, it make more sense to stay hidden now since they want a free ride to headquarters.”

Tightly closing your eyes,  you turned narrowly missing the ungloved hand attempting to grab your shoulder. Making your way out of the bay you went for the door, flashing a look toward Neige who hadn’t turned around and was still facing the window. You turned your attention officially storming off, to do whatever it was you felt like doing without his presence. 

The imposter stood still, blankly smiling at the star system as he tightly clenched his fists. Of course, it’d be like you to suspect such a plan. Only you. But you were just so uptight how could you go bringing such negativity to the Innersloth head quarters after such a hefty loss? It’d be best for him everyone if you had a relaxant relaxed a little. Smiling a bit after such dark times was healthy. And only a good crewmate would keep their remaining teammates healthy, even if their suspicions were debilitating to that health.

Right?

#yandere neige leblanche #yandere rsa #yandere x reader #yandere x you #lovelyyandereaddictionpoint #yanderexrea #yandere #yanderes #yandere twisted wonderland #yandere harem #yandere twst #yandere twst neige #yandere neige #yandere imposter #yandere among us #yandere among us neige leblanche

[blahblahblees]

hey!!! i was thinking about fem!reader x cole water, something like an enemies/rivals to lovers. they’re both very competitive in class and in sports. but, when cole gets injured, he stops caring about school. now, i don’t know how to continue, maybe reader goes to his house to ask him after he fails or smth and they have a fight that ends with him confessing? idk do your thing!! lots of love

ヽ｀、☁ヽ｀─── swim ミ cole walter

✎ ·˚ ༘ ─── two headstrong rivals who’ve always been competitive in everything they do suddenly stop and when push comes to shove, maybe they’ll fall in love.

wc: 1,125

cole walter x fem!reader (use of she/her pronouns & use of y/l (your last name))

tw: kissing/making out (?)

a/n: shit description from me i’m sorry 🙏. but i wanna say before reading, this prompt leans more towards the book version of cole so that’s what was in my head when writing :)

THERE WAS something about Cole Walter that irritated and intrigued her all at the same time. The way he had this “don’t care” attitude, but had been well off to have at least a “B” in all of his classes. He was Cole Walter and he had been the one people eyed in the hallways. The one guy people wanted to be with and couldn’t have unless he looked your way.

And before his injury, the two of you were always neck and neck. It didn’t matter what the topic or subject was, the two of you just had to be better than the other. If you wanted a “A” in math, he would do his best to make an “A+” just to irk you. If he wanted to run laps around the track, you’d join in and out run him by a mile.

But that was before the injury. Before he came an even bigger asshole, which you didn’t think was possible. Something had shifted after the incident and he’d simply changed. He stopped caring about the sports, the academics, the feelings, almost stopped caring about himself it seemed.

And he just pushed people away, he wanted nothing to do with some people, and maybe that’s why the “Cole Effect” had worked so well. You’d be considered lucky if Cole Walter wanted something to do with you, even if it meant for one night.

But things seemed to never go right for Cole. He started failing and if he continued on this path he would repeating his junior year.

And his teachers assigned him to a tutor for every class and she just so happened to be one of them.

She would tutor Cole for science, but none of it seemed to stick. No matter how often they met for the tutoring session, Cole would only come back to her with “D’s” and “F’s” which she didn’t understand. She was a star student herself, so she didn’t quite understand how or why Cole was failing. It looked bad on the both of them and it seemed as if Cole just didn’t care.

So, one night, she decide that she would take matters into her own hands and simply as him why.

She knocked on the door of the Walter’s and on the other side stood Jackie Howard, a small smile on her face as she looked over at the girl.

“Hey.” Jackie smiled.

“Hey.” She replied. “Is Cole home?”

Jackie nodded, opening the door to allow her inside. “He’s upstairs. His room his the first door you see when you’re up there.”

She thanked Jackie and made her way upstairs and gently knocked on the door.

There was shuffling on the other side, but the door opened and Cole stood on the other side, his shirt absent and his shorts hanging absolutely too low, but he was in his room alone, so she couldn’t quite complain.

“What are you doing here, Y/L?”

“Can we talk?”

Cole rested his hands on the doorknob, his body pressed against the frame of the door. “About?”

She sighed deeply. “You keep failing and your grades are reflecting on my tutoring. So I was just wondering-“

“I appreciate you tutoring me.” Cole said, cutting her off. “I really do, but it’s clearly not working. So maybe we should just-“

“It’s wasn’t like this before.” She said. “You’re smart, Cole. I know you. You’ve gotten better grades than I have out of spite. All I’m asking you to do is to try and… study, listen to me when I’m tutoring you-“

“And if I don’t?”

She looked up at him. She was growing angry. Why was he cutting her short? Why wasn’t he trying?

“What’s your problem?” She asked. “Have I done something to you?”

“Not at all, Y/L.” He said calmly. “But it’s getting late, so maybe you should head back home.”

With that, Cole shut his door and she stood on the other side of it, looking at the wooden piece with her brows furrowed.

It was 8:30.

So, she opened the door and slammed it shut behind her as she stood in Cole and Danny’s room. The other twin absent.

“Can I help you?” He asked.

“What’s wrong you?” She asked. “All semester you’ve been failing every class, haven’t joined any extra curriculars, and have done nothing to fix that. I’m trying my best to be nice and tutor you. I’ve been nothing but nice to you and you’ve been nothing but an asshole since-“

“Since what, Y/L?” He asked, his hands pressed against the desk, his muscles flexing as he did so. “Since the accident?” He chuckled. “I had a scholarship. I had football. I don’t have any of that now, so what’s the point?”

“The point is to keep trying.”

Cole shrugged. “I still don’t see the point.”

Her expression softened as she looked at him. "The point is, you're worth more than that. You have potential, Cole. You just need to find your purpose, something that drives you."

"I don't know anymore," Cole said, his tone defeated. "Everything I thought I knew, everything I thought I wanted, it's all gone."

“You don’t need to figure all of that out right now.”

Cole looked down at her, his eyes searching hers. He heavily sighed as he began to think. Why was she the first person to actually talk some sense into him? Out of everyone, it’d been her to make him almost feel seen.

So, he stepped forward, cupping his hands onto her cheeks and gently pressed his lips against hers. It was a soft, tender kiss at first, as though he was testing the waters to see if she would respond.

Cole pulled back, his forehead resting against hers.

“I’m not going to be one of your girls, Cole.” She muttered.

“You’re not.” He said. “I’m sorry… I- I’ll try. I’ll start trying. I just one chance.”

She followed his eyes, trying to see if he’d been lying or that it was some sort of false hope.

But she couldn’t see it, no matter how hard she looked, nothing but a chance had been there.

So, she nodded and pressed forward, gently pressing her lips against his.

This time, the kiss was more passionate, their lips moving together with more urgency. He wrapped his arms around her, pulling her close as his hands ran through her soft hair.

She let out a soft moan as the kiss deepened, her own hands running over his muscular chest as she pressed herself against him.

They pulled away for a moment, panting and grinning at each other.

“We’ll just take things slow for now, okay?” She said.

Cole nodded. “I can do that.”

— lucy has something to say !!

the book and movie are simply not the same

but anyway, i feel like this is kind of all over the place especially towards the end but its down so that’s all that matters.

my request are opened!

you can check out my rules and such before requesting and checking masterlist to see who i write for, for more!

#cole walter #cole walter imagines #cole walter x reader #cole walter x fem!reader #my life with the walter boys #mlwtwb #my life with the walter boys imagines #mlwtwb imagines #imagines #writing #blurbs #wips #netflix #netflix imagines

[7s3ven]

UNBEARABLE. connor stoll (pjo)

( master list )

IN WHICH… Connor Stoll finds enjoyment on pulling all sorts of pranks on Y/N L/N, the charming daughter of Aphrodite. It isn't until he catches her in a moment of weakness that he begins to sympathize with her.

A/N : I kinda feel like I’m carrying the PJO fandom on my back with all these fics lol. Also, people said I could be cast as Drew from PJO. Y’all should ask for my insta so you can confirm me as Drew 😽

Warnings : not following plot, luke is still here bc I adore him, mentions of luke x y/n here and there (Y/N’s an Aphrodite kid, ofc she’s kissed multiple people 😭)

—

A shrill scream pierced the peaceful silence of Camp Half-Blood, waking up most of its campers. Connor Stoll creeped around the corner with a cheeky grin, holding an empty bucket of pink paint. A moment later, Y/N L/N and Silena Beauregard stormed out of the Aphrodite cabin, covered from head to toe in paint.

"I'm going to kill him!" Y/N shouted, eyebrows furrowed in fury. The paint dripped off her body, staining the green grass below. She scoffed.

The Stoll brothers, more specifically Connor, were at it again with their never-ending pranks. Ever since Y/N arrived at camp, she had been the main victim of Connor's tricks. And she hated it.

"Are you okay?" Y/N asked Silena, all of her anger suddenly simmering away once she looked at her sister. Silena nodded, combing the dried paint out of her black hair. Y/N looked over her shoulder, locking eyes with Travis Stoll. She fumed as she quickly strutted towards the elder brother.

"You," She sternly pointed at Travis and poked his chest, "Get your brother under control before I do it myself!"

Travis lifted his arms in surrender, teasingly grinning. “I think he’d like that.”

"Just make him stop! I am sick and tired of being covered in paint when I wake up! Honestly!" Y/N groaned as she stormed back towards her cabin, ushering Silena inside so they could wash up.

Y/N clicked her tongue as she scrubbed the drying paint off her face. Silena was beside her, drying her now clean face with a warm towel. "I can't stand this any longer." She mumbled, running a brush through her hair. She peeled a patch of paint off, scowling in disgust. "Do you think the paint will harm my skin barrier?"

"Oh, absolutely." Silena quickly nodded her head, "We need to do face masks tonight."

Y/N was getting sick of all the pranks that seemed to target her and only her. "Hey, Y/N, we're gonna get breakfast. You wanna come with?" One of her other siblings poked her head around the corner, in the process of changing into a pink shirt.

"Oh, yeah. I'm coming." Y/N flashed Silena a bright smile before joining the other Aphrodite kids.

"Hey, Y/N, don't you think that Connor is kinda cute?" One of the girls nudged her as Y/N tucked herself between Momona and Jacob. Y/N glanced at Connor, frowning.

"No." She scoffed, something she did often whenever Connor was around. "He keeps pulling pranks on me. I can't even see him half of the time because my eyes are always covered in paint."

“She has a point.” Vivviene said, causing Y/N to frown.

“Of course I do. I’m always right.”

Her siblings laughed, throwing their heads back. “Yeah, right!” Jacob exclaimed, “What about that time you said Luke wasn’t guarding the flag and you were wrong? Because he was and he whooped your ass badly!”

Y/N pushed Jacob, playfully scoffing. “It was one mistake! And I landed a few good shots! He got stuck in the infirmary for a week."

“Yeah. And you were with him because of his beating! The Apollo kids found you making out a few times!” Jacob slung an arm around her shoulder, bellowing out another laugh.

Y/N accidently caught Connor's eye from across the room and her smile faltered. She quickly turned her head, the image of her reflection covered in paint engraved in her mind.

She still had paint stuck under her nails and she picked at it. "I'm getting fed up with him." She mumbled, causing her siblings to groan. Y/N scoffed, rolling her eyes. "What?"

"You always talk about him at meals." Jacob said.

"In fact, you're always talking about him. Period." Momona added.

“What if I’m not talking about Connor?” Y/N asked, unknowingly falling into her siblings trap.

"We never mentioned a name.” Vivviene pointed out. Y/N groaned, running a hand through her soft hair. “Maybe he keeps pulling these pranks because he likes you." Vivviene shrugged before eating another spoonful of her food, not noticing how everybody turned their heads to stare wildly at her.

"Excuse me?" Y/N almost choked. "He does not like me. If he did, I don't think he'd be annoying me so much. But I guess boys are naturally annoying." Jacob pursed his lips but nodded in agreement. "Anyway, I have to help some kids with archery practice. I will see all of you later." Y/N grinned at her siblings, teasingly tapping Momona on the nose.

"Oh, great. Tell them to duck when you shoot." Jacob teased.

Y/N rolled her eyes but she still smiled. "Well, I'm off. Bye!" She stood up, gracefully walking away. The kids in the arena seemed to light up as she made her presence known. "Hey kids, great to see you all again! Y'all ready to learn some archery?" The young demigods cheered, excited for their next lesson with the Aphrodite cabin leader instead of the harsh Clarisse.

"So, you just pull the arrow back. As far as you can," Y/N uttered, showing the kids a demonstration. "And once you've got it as far as you can, you just shoot." She let the arrow go, watching as it spiraled through the air and hit bullseye. With that sort of aim, she may as well be an Apollo kid.

The kids clapped while she outstretched her arms, enjoying the applause. "Thank you!" She playfully bowed. "Okay, bows out, arrows ready, and shoot your shot! Quite literally. Aim for the targets over there, not at each other."

The children excitedly grabbed a bow and arrow, trying their best to impress to Y/N. Even if they missed completely, she still clapped and gave them an encouraging pat on the back.

"Great training session guys! I'll see y'all tomorrow!" Y/N waved goodbye to the small group. She was cheerful until she spotted Connor in the distance, conversing with Travis and holding yet another can of paint. She clenched her jaw.

"Connor Stoll, don't you dare use that paint for anything relating to my cabin!" She stormed towards him, sternly pointing at him.

"We weren't planning to but now that you say it, we might." Connor cheekily grinned while Y/N glared at him.

"Stoll, you know I adore everybody in this world... but you are an exception. I loathe you." She poked his chest, "Now, please get rid of the paint in that can."

Connor shrugged. "Okay." He, without a second thought, poured it all over Y/N. For the second time today. She gasped, glowering at Connor.

"You are dead." She said through clenched teeth. "Dead, you nitwit!" She threw a lump of paint at him, hitting him directly in the face. “Honestly.” She scoffed, shaking the paint off. “My skin is going to break out soon and you’ll be to blame!”

She slapped a paint-covered hand on his shoulder before walking off, muttering to herself as she glared at any camper who dared to laugh at her.

“Well, that went smoothly.” Travis said, taking a peek at Connor. “Maybe covering a girl in paint isn’t the best way to woo her.”

“Luke told me it was.”

Travis clicked his tongue, resting a heavy hand on his brother’s back. “… He was messing with you.”

Connor wasn’t a complicated boy. He loved playing pranks but lately Y/N’s reactions had been getting less rewarding. She looked at him like he was the bane of her existence, which he probably was. But how else was he supposed to get her attention?

Without the constant tricks, Y/N would have only ever seen him as another Hermes boy, not worth remembering because her eyes were always on another.

Luke, with his brown-curled hair and a faint scar that ran down his pretty face yet it only elevated his beauty. Connor was pretty sure whatever chemistry and romance between them was done but Luke still snuck glances at Y/N from time to time.

If he was being honest, Connor was a little jealous of his brother. What was his secret to getting Y/N to notice him? Sure, Luke was good-looking but Connor wasn’t lacking in that department either.

"You'll think of something to grab her attention." Travis reassured his brother, nudging him in the ribs, "My advice... plan a picnic. Who knows, it might get you somewhere." The elder Stoll brother tilted his head back, letting out an amused laugh, as he walked away.

Connor clicked his tongue, thinking for a moment. His eyes lit up with mischief as an idea popped into his head. He couldn't guarantee that it was a good one but it's Connor Stoll we're talking about. Y/N woke up with a surprised look on her face. Paint wasn't splattering around her cabin and everybody was sleeping peacefully, not awoken by shrill screams. Y/N furrowed her eyebrows as she sat up, rubbing her eyes. It seemed Connor had finally decided to leave her alone.

She stood up, shivering slightly when her bare feet hit the cold tiles below. She sleepily staggered over to her vanity mirror, peering into it to check her skin as she did everyday. Her appearance was spot on, as usual, except for one thing that made Y/N lose her mind.

Her hair... was pink. It wasn't an ugly type of neon pink but gone were her H/C locks. Y/N tried to hold back a sharp screech but the panic was beginning to set in.

Her half-siblings woke up in alarm.

"My hair..." Y/N seethed to them, barely able to contain her fury, "That little..." She couldn't even find an appropriate insult as her body trembled in anger.

"I'm sure we can wash it out." Silena rushed to Y/N's aid. "It's still early. I'll draw you a bath and we can scrub it out."

Silena was wrong. Two bottles of shampoo later, the color was still vivid.

"I can't go out like this." Y/N said, tugging at the ends of her hair. "They'll laugh at me... and mother, oh gods... she's going to hate me for changing my hair."

"It’s not your fault." Silena comforted her. “I’ll talk to Connor. I’ll make him tell me how to get rid of it. Then we can fix it. Okay?”

Y/N slowly nodded. “This is fine.” She muttered to herself when Silena was long gone. She applied a thin layer of gloss to her lips, soothing herself. “Mother won’t hate you because it was all his doing…” She took a deep breath, closing her eyes. When she looked at her reflection for a second time, she felt her anger flare up again.

As an Aphrodite kid, her appearance was everything. It was her identity and more. "What about personality?" Other campers would ask her and she'd simply laugh. What about beauty? The first thing people will see is how you carry yourself, how you walk, how you look. Personality had nothing to do with first impressions.

Y/N was a beauty among the Aphrodite girls, standing out more than she should. She had always been her mother's favorite. Without her carefully styled H/C hair, who was she? Her hair was an important detail to her and she didn't know what to do now. Would people still love her as they did before? Without her outstanding looks, she was nothing.

Y/N slipped out of her cabin via the window. Everybody was at breakfast so it wasn't hard to avoid people from seeing her hair. Y/N was supposed to be teaching archery again today but she'd rather battle a hellhound than show up with pink hair.

She wandered around the forest, eventually finding herself in front of a small river. A few nymphs sat near the water, giggling together. They spotted Y/N and all gasped in unison, scrambling away except for one who was brave enough to stay.

"I like your hair." She shyly said, coyly kicking her leg into the water. She charmingly smiled before hurrying off after her friends, who laughed at timid behavior.

Y/N fell to her knees in front of the river, staring mindlessly at the cool liquid. She wondered what it found feel like to dunk her head beneath the water, an action she saw the nymphs do quite often.

She didn't know how much time had passed. Maybe it was minutes or hours but Y/N found herself sprawled on a warm rock, basking in the sun. She heard footsteps approach her and she hoped it was Silena. It wasn't. It was Connor instead.

"Oh." Y/N deadpanned, displeased to see him. "It's you." She deeply scowled, turning away.

"You, uh, weren't at breakfast." Connor kicked a nearby rock as he cleared his throat, "And the archery kids were wondering where you were too. Luke had to take over and he may be the best swordsman but he's far from the best archer. He kept missing the target."

Y/N let out a small huff of amusement. "What are you doing here, Connor?" That was the first time she had called him by his first name. She often referred to him as Stoll.

"I wanted to check up on you. Are you... okay?"

"No, Connor, I am not okay!" Y/N suddenly snapped, "Why can't you ever leave me alone? Did I do something to hurt you? I could deal fine with the paint and water buckets but my hair? You dyed my hair pink! My mother loved my H/C hair and now you've ruined it!"

"It won't last forever." Connor retorted, taking a step towards Y/N.

"That doesn't matter!” She screamed, standing up. “My looks are important to me, Connor! I can't pull off pink hair, it doesn't match my skin undertone! I need to be perfect otherwise my mother won’t love me!”

"You can pull anything off, Y/N. You're pretty."

Y/N's eyes momentarily softened as she gazed at him, her cheeks flushing a light hue of pink. "You think I'm pretty? Even... even with messy pink hair, smudged mascara, and fading eyeliner?"

"I think you're always pretty." He answered, “Even when you do those heatless curls that make you look silly. And I think you’re the prettiest when you aren’t trying.”

“Don’t think your compliments will get you off the hook.” Y/N warned, glaring at him.

“Will a star-gazing date at seven get me off the hook?” Connor asked, mischievously grinning.

In turn, Y/N narrowed her eyes. “Maybe.” She uttered before turning around and walking back to camp, concealing her pink hair once more.

PJO TAG LIST : @lostinhisworld @julielightwood @outerbanks-stuff @jennapancake @csifandom @evrybodydies1 @kkrenae @s0ulsniper @annispamz @justanotherkpopstanlol @soraya-09 @simpforeveyone @papichulo120627 @corpsebridenightamare @lilacspider @prettylilsimp @urmomsbananabread @ur-lacol-dsylexic @hottiewifeyyyy @kamiliora @be-bap @finnickodaddy @th0tblckgrl @shoyofroyoyoyo @uniquely-her @imafrkinsimp @syraxesrevenge @ahh-chickens @dracoslovergirl @midnightstar-90 @8812-342 @liv1104 @krkiiz @arialikestea @ch16rles @lizziesliz @maryclx01 @lukecastellandefender @yuminako @coryoskywalker @julielightwood @crybabysbakery @jsbabyyy @liviessun @p3pperm1nttea @angie-esc @purplerose291 @prettylilsimp @10ava01 @froggiesstalks @happy-jj @czennieszn @gisellesprettylies @loveyava @csifandom @luvvfromme @mashiromochi @kamiliora @yorksyree @mqg125 @jamesmackreideswife @niktwazny303 @2hiigh2cry @user021099 @living-in-my-imagination88 @xx-all-purpose-nerd-xx @randomgurl2326 @niktwazny303 @connorstollfanpage

#connor stoll #hermes pjo #pjo show #luke castellan #annabeth chase #greek mythology #luke castellan pjo #luke castellan x reader #percy jackson series #percy jackson fanfiction #grover underwood #camp half blood #travis stoll #stoll brothers #pjo stuff #connor stoll x reader #connor stoll x you #aphrodite #aphrodite pjo

[bonesandchalamet]

the fourth - j.fisher

masterlist

pairings: Jeremiah fisher x fem!reader

warnings: minor spelling/grammatical errors + fluff

a/n: super excited for the second season 😁😁

the Fourth of July on cousins beach was something else. it was far different from the normal parties at home. there were fireworks for miles at almost every hour of the night. the sky lit up in colors of red, white, blue, and sparkling shimmery gold.

there was nothing more magical than cousins beach lit up under the beautiful dazzling display.

however, you could think of a view much more beautiful to stare at. Jeremiah fisher.

he was one of Susannah’s boys that you began to develop a crush on. you’d seen him lifeguarding the pool from time to time. he’d been on the stand at your very first time at the country club, and while he was rotating around the pool, he crouched down to where you rest against the ledge, “you shouldn’t be in this pool.” he says, a playful smirk forms against his lips, “you’re making my job harder.”

from that point forward, you made it your mission to show up to that damn country club and in whatever skimpy bikini you could find to impress him. it’s what got you invited to the summer bash on the beach with his friends.

“this is Steven, who you’ve met he works at the club, belly, and my brother conrad. guys this is y/n.”

“you come here every summer?” belly asks, she’s the first to whisk you away from the three boys while they searched for the keg or any sightings of drinks.

“no, this is my first time.” you follow her along the sand, allowing the grains to slip into your sandals before situating yourselves towards the water.

“I can see you have an eye for Jeremiah.” belly nudges your shoulder before quickly turning her head in search of the boys. there wasn’t a sight of them for miles, so the coast was clear to chat of them, “he likes you too. he talks about you a lot.”

her emphasis makes you blush. having not known Jeremiah well enough, or even close enough, you’re unsure if he does this often. you’re unsure if it’s compliment that he speaks about you, or if he does this so often it’s annoying for his friends.

you don’t have too much time to question her before Jeremiah is kicking sand in your face and plopping down against the sand beside you. he’s brought two red solo cups, one for you and the other for him.

“thank you.” you smile. you take the cup from his hand, fingers briefly touching, his hand is wet from the condensation of the cup. you’re blushing even harder than when belly was talking about him, and you’re so thankful for the stars and the dark skies to mask it.

“I think shayla is here we should go find her.” belly suggests to conrad and Steven. while the three get up you catch belly’s eyes and she flashes a wink in your direction. you owe her for next time, and you’re sure there will be another.

“so you’ve never seen the fireworks here?” he scoots closer to you, thighs briefly brushing against each other.

you feel the butterflies in your stomach erupt as you look over into his eyes. the stars reflect in them, you can feel your heart beating faster when he looks over at you.

just as you begin to reply, the eruption of the crackles in the sky startles everything in you. you subconsciously jump closer to him, and feel his arm wrap around your shoulders, “I got you, it’s okay.” he chuckles while pulling you almost into his lap.

“I’m sorry I’m not normally scared.” you reply with a chuckle. you’re hesitant to relax against his body. he smells of sun tan lotion and a mixture of cologne, you could get used to that.

he turns his head in your direction. a small smile forms against his lips, “you’re beautiful under these stars.”

you inch closer, eyes glued on his lips. this is the only thing you could ever want. a kiss under the stars, fireworks erupting in the background. you want this.

you wonder what his lips taste like. do they taste like the beer he just drank? or perhaps the cherry popsicle he was previously sucking on that turned his lips bright red. the curiosity was killing you.

“that one’s pretty.” he swivels his head in the direction of the sky, index finger pointed at the golden shimmer against the darkness. you watch them for a moment, how they shimmer and dazzle.

for a moment, you feel the world stop around you. like life beyond you is just background noise and the fireworks are all you can see. you feel like a little kid again, wondering what life was like on cousins at age eight. you wonder how cute Jeremiah was then. you wonder if his family and belly’s did sparklers or cozied up under a fire to witness these very same Fourth of July fireworks.

it’s then when he takes his chance. he gently places his index finger under your chin and turns your face towards him. the curls that brush against his forehead gently tickle your forehead as he leans in. his lips fit like a glove. they taste like a mixture of cherry popsicle and bitter wheat beer he was illegally drinking.

you can feel fireworks in your own stomach erupting. they shoot up and dazzle over and over as he keeps kissing you. his hand is wrapped around the base of your head, fingers tangled in your hair.

“you taste like beer.” you say finally pulling away for air. you feel like you’re floating above water. heart is full of so much joy you’re smiling wider than you ever thought you could.

“is that why you stopped?”

you shake your head brushing a couple of strains of hair that stuck to your face from the wind, “no, I never wanna stop.”

“good,” he pauses for a second, fingers lacing into your hair again, “me neither.”

#jeremiah x reader #tsitp jeremiah #jeremiah fisher #jeremiah fisher x y/n #jeremiah fisher x reader #jeremiah fisher fluff #jeremiah fisher imagine #Jeremiah fisher fic #Jeremiah fisher drabble #Jeremiah fisher one shot #Jeremiah x y/n #team jeremiah #the summer i turned pretty fic #the summer i turned pretty fics #the summer i turned pretty #gavin casalegno #conrad fisher #belly conklin #tsitp x reader #tsitp x you #tsitp fic #tsitp fluff #tsitp #tsitp x y/n

[ramshackledtrickster]

Major major MAJOR across the Spiderverse spoilers under the cut

Just an idea for Spiderverse 3 ,,,

Ok possible idea for Spiderverse 3: bc the spot is so powerful now what if he can manifest his own dimensions? So he utilizes that to break apart the spiderpeople that try to take him down he sends them into their own pocket dimensions, and Miguel gets trapped in a dimension where everything is right and he has Gabriella.

Miguel in this movie is a well rounded character but he hasn’t undergone major change in thinking or philosophy yet (though hints to towards the end). His major barrier in the film is his refusal to accept anything other than tragedy not only being inevitable but be an absolute defining trait of what makes a hero, even when tragedy can and could be prevented. He’s grieving, he’s guilty, yet refuses to call himself the first anomaly and shoves that title onto miles, and he projects all his grief and loathing out on a fifteen year old that has no control over what happened to him (wow what a hypocrite).

Miles’ unpredictability and limitless potential is in direct conflict with the philosophy that he maintains which gives him purpose, that makes his losses more acceptable.

And Miguel lets that pain completely define and rewrite him, instead of that acknowledging that pain as just a part of him— an essential part, like everyone else’s losses, but not the *only* part. Because the true core of Spider-Man that often comes with that pain is choice. And he has yet to internalize that for himself. Though he’s the leader of the spider society, he himself isn’t a true Spider-Man yet (note how while his suit is polished, his face and skin still carry a sketchy quality,, like construction lines and all that). I believe he should get closure in the third film, and his final design would reflect that.

So, in this pocket dimension, Miles and Gwen and maybe some other spider people have to find Miguel and show him the truth that none of this is real it’s a trap— but the onky person that can truly free him from the prison is himself. Miguel has to remember that while he shouldn’t forget this event or let this happen again, he should recognize life and the future is flexible, and not shut yourself or anyone else off from those chances, despite what the numbers or the canon dictates.

He finally understands, and sees Miles for what he represents— Free will, limitless potential, and the choice that makes a Spider-Man. And he has to follow in his lead to get out.

As the world around this pocket dimension is falling apart as the truth becomes clear though, Miguel is still holding onto Gabriella— and Gabriella, though she’s a simulation, feels so real to him. He senses her fear and confusion and he refuses to let his baby girl go.

But they exchange a few final words.

And miguel promises not to let her memory be in vain.

And she’s gone.

Miguel is alone with his thoughts.

Miles reaches out, offering him another chance to get back up— like Spider-Man always does

And Miguel does so and finally chooses that path.

Now they’re going to do it Miles’ way.

Alternative images In case Miguel is getting lost in that zone and he’s deteriorating art wise n getting broken down like Spot was if he’s there for too long

Or maybe he stays solid and Gabriella’s the one who degrades! Who knows!

Super tempted to board this out maybe but I’m not particularly good at dialogue so who knows

#spiderman across the spiderverse #spiderman #across the spider verse spoilers #spoiler tag #major spoilers I’m not kidding #my art #fanart #marvel #spiderman spoilers

[yanderecrazysie]

Asmodeus NSFW Yandere Alphabet

I’m in a NSFW mood today, sorry minors.

WARNINGS: yandere themes, very NSFW, mentions of non-con

A: Aftercare (What they’re like after sex)

He likes to cuddle after sex sometimes. He is always the big spoon and loves to hump your butt a little to make himself hard again for round two. He’ll also run a bath for you to clean up when you’re both done.

B: Body Part (Their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

For you, he thinks you have a cute butt. He loves the way it jiggles when you walk and loves to run his palm over the curve of your ass cheeks. He wouldn’t say no to big boobs either. For himself, he likes everything about himself, but especially his dick. It’s the part that gets the most pleasure and he likes how it looks. The avatar of lust has the perfect cock, after all.

C: Cum (Anything to do with cum)

Asmodeus’s cum tastes delicious- like, way better than it ever should. That’s a perk of being the avatar of lust. He cums a medium amount, just enough to fill you up, but not enough to overflow. His cum is also not too thick but not too watery. Basically, he’s literally perfect.

D: Dirty Secret

Asmodeus is super sensitive on his back. He loses control over himself if you touch his back and might do something he regrets later. It’s just something about the way your soft hands touch his spine that instantly gets him hard as a rock.

E: Experience (How experienced are they? Do they know what they’re doing?)

Asmodeus is very experienced. As the avatar of lust, he’s put many women, and even some men, under his spell. Witches are his favorite, but humans are just as fun to play around with, and he’s fucked plenty of both. He hasn’t gone for any angels though, and very few demons.

F: Favorite Position

Asmodeus prefers missionary because he can look down at you while still taking all of the control. He loves seeing his reflection in your wide eyes and loves snapping his hips into yours to see your mouth open in long drawn-out moans. He doesn’t mind cowgirl either, as long as you let him take control.

G: Goofy (Are they more serious in the moment, or are they humorous, etc.)  

Asmodeus isn’t exactly joking as much as he is teasing. You love me so much, don’t you? You’re moaning just for me, you cute little thing. You’re in the splash zone, cutie pie. He plays around with you just like a demon does with their prey. He’ll purr these things into your ear as he plays with your pretty pussy.

H: Hair (How well-groomed are they, does the carpet match the drapes, etc.)

Asmodeus keeps himself well groomed, as he thinks it’s important to take care of. He doesn’t shave it all the way, just long enough to be noticeable but not a turn off. It’s the same color as his hair and doesn’t travel up to his belly button like it does for a lot of people (in fact, he barely has body hair).

I: Intimacy (How are they during the moment, romantic aspect)

Asmodeus may tease you, but he’s actually very loving and caring. He makes sure you’re soaking the sheets before he even attempts to enter you and his goal is to make you orgasm as much as possible. He’s also very romantic, sprinkling rose petals around the room and running you a hot bubble bath for when you both are done having your fun.

J: Jack Off (Masturbation headcanon)

Asmodeus doesn’t masturbate. If he feels in the mood, which is often, he goes and finds someone to fuck. Of course, when he falls in love with you, you’re the only one he seeks out to satisfy his urges. If he can’t have you, he’ll just stay pent up until he can.

K: Kink (one or more of their kinks)

Asmodeus likes dressing up like a girl sometimes- having sex in a dress or wearing pink panties before you start your fun. He also likes stealing your own panties so he can sniff them later. Just to remember you by, of course.

L: Location (Favorite places to do the do)

Asmodeus is adventurous. While he likes doing the deed at home (because he can set it up and make it romantic), he’s not afraid to fuck in public. He especially likes the park and movie theater. It gives him a rush like nothing else.

M: Motivation (What turns them on, gets them going)

It doesn’t take much to turn Asmodeus on. If you touch his back, the effect is instant, but if you don’t, all he needs is you both alone in a room together before he’s whining for you to agree to having sex with him. He’s a needy man and the avatar of lust, so just about everything turns him on. Even nothing at all.

N: No (Something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

Asmodeus isn’t a sadist- he would never hurt you on purpose. He might have a tiny bit of masochism in him, but he has not an ounce of sadism. He could never whip you or degrade you or anything like that.

O: Oral (Preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

Asmodeus loves both giving and receiving, but he likes giving just a little more. He’s very experienced with eating girls out, so you’ll quickly find that he hits all the right spots with ease. For receiving, he doesn’t mind if you’re inexperienced, he’s happy to guide you into giving him a good experience.

P: Pace (Are they fast and rough? Slow and sensual?)  

Asmodeus is slow and sensual, holding you close as he rolls his hips, grinding deep inside of you. He thrusts lightly, not aiming for your cervix but for your g-spot. He doesn’t go hard when he finds it, just keeps a gentle rhythm. Sometimes he rubs at your clit during sex.

Q: Quickie (Their opinions on quickies rather than proper sex, how often, etc.)  

Asmodeus doesn’t do fast. He loves to draw it out, take as much time as he needs. A quickie is almost an insult to him. It feels like a quickie means throwing away all the hard work for just a lousy bit of sex. He doesn’t really mind when others do it, but it’s not for him.

R: Risk (Are they game to experiment, do they take risks, etc.) 

Asmodeus is willing to try almost anything, but he’s pretty consistent when it comes to sex. He knows what works for him and what doesn’t. If you want to try something new, then great! He’ll do it as long as it doesn’t hurt you.

S: Stamina (How many rounds can they go for, how long do they last…)

Asmodeus has basically unlimited stamina. Like an incubus, he grows stronger from sex. He likes to cum at the same time you do, but if he chose not to, he could go as long as he felt like. He loves to do multiple rounds to send you into overstimulation, but he’ll go easy on you if you ask him to.

T: Toys (Do they own toys? Do they use them? On a partner or themselves?)

Asmodeus doesn’t have any toys for himself, since he doesn’t masturbate, but he does have a vibrator he uses on you sometimes and a feather he likes to tickle your skin with. Other than that, his toy drawer is empty.

U: Unfair (How much they like to tease)

Asmodeus likes to tease quite a bit. He’ll get you to the brink of orgasm, then stop. He wants you to beg for him to make you cum and he’s good at what he does. Don’t worry though, when you give in, he’ll give you the best orgasms of your life.

V: Volume (How loud they are, what sounds they make)

Asmodeus is loud. He moans like a pornstar and sometimes lets out a giggle when he sees your eyes roll back in your head. He doesn’t grunt or groan, it’s definitely moaning. He just likes to show you how he feels!

W: With or without consent (Non-con or consensual?)

Asmodues prefers consent so, so much. He wants you looking into his eyes as he fucks you, not crying or looking away. However, if you reject him, and he knows you’re off limits, he may just kidnap you because he desperately needs relief and he can’t turn to masturbation or other girls.

X: X-Ray (Let’s see what’s going on in those pants)

Asmodeus is just an inch bigger than average and his girth is the same story. But his cock is so pretty and has no visible veins running down the side. It’s a pretty shade of pink and is without any blemishes. It curves a little upwards, which helps him hit your g-spot.

Y: Yearning (How high is their sex drive?)

Asmodeus could have sex with you multiple times every day if he wanted, but he knows you might not be up for that. Since he doesn’t masturbate, it builds up over time until he has to get some release. Then, he’ll fuck you until you’re too tired to move.

Z: ZZZ (… how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

Asmodeus sometimes runs a bath for the both of you, but right afterwards, it’s cuddling and sleeping on his bed. He gets a little smile on his face in his sleep and it’s actually really cute. He falls asleep either at about the same time as you or slightly after.

#yandere #yandere x reader #yandere alphabet #tw noncon #yandere asmodeus #obey me asmodeus #yandere obey me #obey me

[darkficsyouneveraskedfor]

Don't Speak 38

Warnings: this fic will include dark content such as dubcon/noncon, obsession, stalking, manipulation, reclusive behaviour, disordered eating, dissociation, allusions to abuse, and other possible triggers. My warnings are not exhaustive, enter at your own risk.

This is a dark!fic and explicit. 18+ only. Your media consumption is your own responsibility. Warnings have been given. DO NOT PROCEED if these matters upset you.

Summary: Reader is a reclusive loner who ventures down to the library on a simple mission. Her task is complicated by the man she meets there. (f!short!reader)

Character: librarian!Andy Barber

Note: new year, same Andrew.

As per usual, I humbly request your thoughts! Reblogs are always appreciated and welcomed, not only do I see them easier but it lets other people see my work. I will do my best to answer all I can. I’m trying to get better at keeping up so thanks everyone for staying with me <3

Your feedback will help in this and future works (and WiPs, I haven’t forgotten those!)

Love you all. Take care. 💖

You bend over the tub, testing the temperature with your fingertips. That incessant flutter doesn't quit. Your stomach is all topsy turvy. With guilt, with shame, with anxiety.

Every word Andy said echoes in your head. His pain, his anger, and that other thing that always overrides the rest; neediness. He doesn't want, he needs. Everything.

Before you can stand, something caresses your lower back. You squeak and stand so fast it makes you dizzy. As you face Andy, your feet tangle in each other.

He's already down to his boxers. You don't see the rest of his clothes, he must've come like that. You give a sheepish smile and press against the side of the tub.

He grins but winces. He turns to check his reflection, leaning in as he touches his swollen cheek. Another strike of guilt razes your body.

He backs away from the mirror and drops his hands. You look off as he feels along the front of his underwear. You don't know why it still makes you so… nervous.

He pulls the fabric down and you sidle along the tub. You can't get past him. He looms over you and brushes close as he peers into the water.

“No bubbles?” He says.

You flinch and clasp your hands together, “sorry, I–”

“I'm teasing, honey,” he touches your shoulder, rubbing the fabric of your sleeve between his fingers, “you're going to join me, right? You said…”

“Yeah, yeah,” you squeak, “I just… you get in first…”

He lingers but only for a moment. He turns as you avoid looking directly at him. You push away the thoughts that battle against each other. Those fearful ones which note the strength corded in his muscles, and those other, curious and confused. The one's not innately attached to him which often wander to another. Someone you shouldn't think of like that.

You chew your lip as you muster what courage you have left. Much of it was spent simply knocking on his door. You've never been very brave, have you?

You pull your blouse off first. The short exhales that hisses beneath the noise of the faucet tickles your ears. You know he's watching you. That makes your hands shake.

You fold the crisp white blouse over the end of the counter and undo the top button of skirt. You shimmy out and lay it with the top. Then you pull the stockings down your legs, leaning on the counter for more than balance.

You stand in your plain white bra and panties. Andy clucks as the water stirs.

“We should get you some cute bras to go with your panties,” he says, “maybe pink?”

You swallow. You don't know what to say. He's being provocative and you know it.

“I like purple better,” you say as you steel yourself and unhook your bra. You hesitate before you let it fall away.

“Purple is nice too,” he agrees. “Honey…”

He leans back and reaches his arm over the edge of the tub. You turn to him, fingers on the then scalloped elastic of your panties. You're being good. You won't argue. You won't hurt him again.

You roll down your panties and leave them on the tile. You have to keep from sprinting away and make yourself go forward. You approach the tub and he reached for you. You accept his large hand as you step over the wall of the tub.

He purrs and guides you down, his other hand tracing along the curve of your hip and side. You sit between his legs as he makes room for you. He's rigid against your back, twitching as he eases you to recline against his stomach.

He sighs as the tension slowly leaves his muscles. His hands wander along your lower stomach. You try to keep from locking up but your stiff and startled. He cups your chest and wiggles beneath you. Your heartbeat hammers.

“You nervous?” He chuckles into your hair.

You nod and gulp loudly.

“Why, baby? We've done it all before.”

“I… know,” you quiver, “but… it's still new to me.”

He laughs again, his thumbs rolling around your nipples until they're hard.

“That's good. To feel that way. That excitement,” his timbre is silty and deep, “you know I feel the same. I can't get enough because every time feels just as good as the first.”

“Oh, uh, yeah,” you agree weakly. You waych the water rise and squirm, “it's going to overflow.”

You try to sit up but he holds you down for a moment. Keeping you against him, just a second, as if to say, I am letting you get away. You rise up and twist off the faucet as his fingertips dancing up and down your back.

You lay back again and he groans. His swollen dick bobs between you. He curls and arm across your stomach, his other hand dipping beneath the water to knead the side of your ass. He nuzzles your crown as the rumble in his chest gets louder.

“Will you put me in?” He asks.

You don't know what he means. Not at first. Not until he shifts his hips, lifting you slightly so his tip prods along your cheeks. You grasp the edge of the tub as your eyes round.

“Please, I just want to feel you.”

You nod, speechless. You ache at the thought. You don't think your ready for him. Have you ever been?

You push your hand under the water and angle around. You find him and line him up with your cunt. Even submerged, you're dry. You tilt your hips and rub his head along your lips, trying to work up to it.

You feel his impatience as he rocks his hips, prodding again. You hold your breath and angle him against your entrance. It burns just to get his head in you. You pull back and try again, a little further but just as fiery.

Slowly you get him, halfway as he growls and once more fondles your chest. He tilts from below, moving his hips steadily until he chafes past your resistance. You whimper but try to make it sound less agonized.

“Mmm,” he buries himself to his limit, well past your own. Tears bobble on your eyes. “I could stay just like this. How about you, honey?”

You nod and tamp down the pain, “yes… An–honey.”

He doesn't move. He keeps you flush as he continues to feel you up. He reaches down to knead your thighs and your hips, tickles your stomach, gropes your chest, and finally, settles a hand across your throat. He purrs and kisses your hair.

“You make me feel so… big,” he growls.

And he makes you feel insignificant. You let out a moan and nod above his knuckle. He squeezes just enough for you to gasp.

“I'm not going to hurt you…” he says, the last of his words dangle unsaid; not like you did me.

You stay still as his thumb presses under your jaw. You can breathe, just barely. He presses his nose into your hair and groans and he pulls himself out of you, just to his tip, then eases back in. You puff out a breath as your hand falls to grip his hips beneath you.

“Shhh, baby, you relax,” he coos as he thrusts again, long and slow, as if he knows it's torture, as if he's drawing his vengeance. “Fuck, you're so tight around me…”

He continues at the pace. Deliberate and devious. You feel your walls stretch with each plunge into you, your back wracks with tension.

You try to breathe through the torment. You can't as he picks up his tempo, pulling out slow only to snap back into you. His pelvis makes you sore with each dip inside.

The water swirls and splashes as his breath hitches. Your own is trapped as his hand becomes a vice around your neck. You wheeze as he bucks into you from below, jolting your entire body with each thrust. He growls and snarls and sneers as he uses you to his delight. To your horror.

You close your eyes and give in. You go limp as you let him have you. As you try to make yourself feel as good as he does. Why can't it feel nice for you?

You clamp around him as a vision flickers across your eyelids. One that makes you squeak. That has you clutching at Andy's thick wrist, trying to swallow down air.

No, no, you shouldn't, but it feels better with those thoughts. You don't feel so worn out. You feel almost giddy to think of him instead.

You squeeze Andy's arm and a moan escapes his grip. Steve, oh Steve. You see his blue eyes watching you. Feel his hands petting you. Gentle, not rough.

The bathroom disappears and is replaced with a new scene. The leather couch in Dr. Kemp's office. He's there with you, on top of you, holding you. And you like it.

The pressure builds in your core as he writhes with you. As you intertwine in pleasure, working as one, not against each other. You're chest is ready to burst as he pecks along your forehead and cheek, coaxing you as his warm cologne tinges your senses.

“Good girl,” he slithers into your ear.

Something in you snaps. Just like with the toy but better. More intense.

Your eyes open wide and you gasp out as you're swept up in the rolling tide. Your hand drops from Andy’s wrist as you let him choke the words you dare not say. Steve, Steve, Steve…

Your orgasm piques quickly and just as suddenly fizzles out. A glimmer against the gray reality. Your head swells as the pain seeps back in.

You're bad. You're very bad. If Andy knew… he can't. You promised not to hurt him again. So you won't let him ever find out.

🕊

You work at layering the flat noodles, sauce, and cheese. Lasagne has always been a favourite, Amber's especially. But you can try your best.

The fragrance of tomato and basil waft in the air. You focus on the task. It's easy to appreciate the simple things when there is so much around that's complicated.

As you lay down the last layer of cheese, you check the temperature on the stove. It's not done preheating. You'll have time to wash up a bit.

You rinse the silicon spatula, a pot, a pan, and a bowl. You dry your hands as the stove beeps and reach for the heavy pan of pasta. As you move to put it in the stove, your thighs squeeze together and remind you of the less simple tasks.

You shut the oven door and cling onto the handle and bask in the warmth. You close your eyes. You haven't slept much in the last few days. Each time you try, he wakes you again.

That day could’ve been a renewal. With Andy working again, you have hours to yourself, but when you did try to doze, you were kept awake with dread. You feel yourself cracking again but you won't let it show. Not this time.

You look over at the knife block. Your eyes stick there. You try not to think of blades or their edges on your skin. You shudder and shake your head.

The front door pulls you back. You turn as you hear Andy in the entryway. You rush out to meet him. He puts his bag down and lets you help him out of his coat. As you hang it, his hand wanders under your skirt and he pinches your ass.

“Something smells good,” he sniffs emphatically.

“Lasagne,” you draw away and smile at him.

“Mmm,” he hums as he looks at you, “dove…” he has a devilish twinkle in his eye, “you know… tomorrow is Friday.”

“Yes,” you confirm tenuously.

“So, well… would you want to do something special?”

“Special?” You echo him, your stomach starting up again.

“If I asked you a favour… it's been a long week, you know, so I was… hoping you might take some of the load off,” he explains, “but it's something fun.”

“Okay?”

“Tomorrow, when I get home, will you… will you wait for me naked?” His cheeks tint red just sligthly as he smirks guiltily.

You blink as your brows pop up. You didn't expect that. You couldn't even think of something like that.

“I… I guess,” you press your sweaty palms to your skirt, “I could…”

“And when I come in, you can undress me too,” he steps close, his hands on your hips, “one piece at a time…”

“Sure,” you eke out.

“And you'll kiss me?”

You nod.

“And take care of me?”

Another nod.

“You're so good to me, dove,” he purrs as he cradles your chin, forcing your head up, “I have another surprise for you.”

He lets the statement hover as he kisses you. He sways you as he wraps you up in one arm. His tongue invades your mouth, nearly gagging you, but you're getting better. You don't even murmur as the gross sliminess.

He finally parts and you catch your breath. He bites his lip as he looks you up and down again. He smiles and inhales deeply, his chest rising and falling in content. He tugs on his belt, wiggling his hips as you ignore the bulge in his pants.

He turns and reaches for his bag. He slips his hand into the top and slides a shape out. It's your tablet. He holds it just out of your grasp as he faces you.

“You've been doing so good. I'm… sorry I took it,” he offers it to you. “I was upset and afraid. I know now how much you love me, dove.”

You put your hand on the other side but he doesn't let go. He keeps you deadlocked as he grips the case tight.

“But you should only talk to Dr. Kemp in session. I think that's best,” he girds.

"I understand,” you try not to rip the tablet away. You can't help but be desperate for it. You haven't drawn in so long.

“Good,” he lets go and you hug the tablet to your chest.

You smile and look down at the top of the case. It's a small victory. Just like the fading bruises on his face.

“Honey,” your heart leaps as you start before you can stop yourself. No, it's too much but you have to ask. While he's happy. “Can… can my sister come over? Next week?”

“Amber,” his smile falls in an instant, “I don't know… feels too soon.”

“Okay,” you accept. You know better than to argue, “but eventually?”

His brows lower and his cheek dimples, “how about we chat with Dr. Kemp about it?”

You could jump! It's not a yes but isn't a no either.

“Yes, honey, we can do that,” you recite.

“We…” he smiles, “we can.”

#andy barber #dark andy barber #dark!andy barber #andy barber x reader #defending jacob #steve kemp #fresh #au #library au #series #fic #dark!fic #dark fic #don't speak

[janaispunk]

just think of the fun things we could do

a little extra from the dress series universe, takes place before the main series

paring: Dave York x f!reader

a/n: The plot brain isn’t braining, but the horny brain certainly is. I wrote this on my phone in one night and read it over once, don’t judge it too hard.

word count: ~1.2k

summary: “That wasn’t a good girl thing to do though. Sending me that fucking picture when you know damn well where I am right now.” “I’m sorry, sir,” you whisper and hear him scoff. “No, you’re not.”

warnings/tags: explicit smut (18+ only!), able-bodied reader, phone sex, praise kink, degradation kink, sir kink, masturbation (m & f), dirty talk, Dave being a menace as usual, dom/sub dynamics, idiots in love, a tiny bit of fluff

dividers by @/saradika <3

find my full masterlist here!

Desperate, are we?

Your phone lights up on the bedside table beside you, illuminating your dark bedroom. You grab for it quicker than you’d like to admit, your eyes squinting to adjust to the harsh glow of the display.

You had been trying to go to sleep, trying to accept that he wasn’t going to reply to the photo that you had sent him earlier. The photo of your own reflection in your bedroom mirror, wearing nothing but the lingerie that you had bought today while picturing him tearing it off your body.

You had debated if you could to send it to him, but had ultimately decided that Dave wasn’t someone who left his phone lying around and that it should be safe. He had never said that you weren’t allowed to text him, even though he was usually the one to initiate contact first.

When he didn’t reply, you reasoned with yourself that he was probably just busy, that it wasn’t a rejection. But you missed him, you had been missing him since he kissed you goodbye the day before and left your apartment to return to his real life. You wished that you didn’t, that you couldn’t still feel the whisper of his rough touch on your hips, where bruises were forming now, and the press of his lips against yours before he muttered “be good” and pulled your apartment door closed behind him.

But you do miss him and you can still feel him, which had you tossing and turning in your bed and checking your phone far too often, as if you’d somehow missed a notification.

Until now. You stare at the tiny letters on your screen, already biting your lip in nervous anticipation, when another text comes through.

Are you still up?

You hastily type back a Yes, not sure what to expect, when your phone starts ringing in your hand. “Hey,” you breathe, after quickly accepting the call.

“Hi, sweetheart.”

The sound of his deep voice, even through the phone’s speaker, fills you with want immediately.

“Did you touch yourself?”

He skips all pleasantries, his tone stern and in control, just how you know him. Just how you like him.

“No, I was- I was waiting for you.”

“Good girl,” he coos and the rumble of his voice goes straight to your pussy, already aching for him. “That wasn’t a good girl thing to do though. Sending me that fucking picture when you know damn well where I am right now.”

“I’m sorry, sir,” you whisper and hear him scoff.

“No, you’re not.”

“No, I’m not,” you admit and his responding chuckle makes you smile.

“So what did you want, huh? I fucked you all weekend and that insatiable pussy still can’t get enough?” The tone in his voice makes you shudder; this is more than you had hoped for when sending him that photo. Your fingertips slide under your sleep shirt on their own accord and you stay silent for a moment too long. Dave clicks his tongue impatiently.

“I expect an answer when I’m talking to you. It’s been one day and you’ve already forgotten all your manners, it seems like.”

You take a deep, shuddering breath. Two minutes of talking to him and you already feel like you’re melting.

“I wanted to show you. I-I bought this today, thinking about you. Just wanted you to see.”

Dave groans softly and you feel yourself clenching around nothing at the sound. “You did? Looking like a good little slut, and all just for me, isn’t that right doll?”

“Yes, sir,” you breathe and he clicks his tongue again. “Say it.”

You simultaneously love and hate when he does this and you squirm the way you always do, but the will to please him wins out, the way it always does. Your quiet “I wanted to look like a slut for you,” makes him chuckle again and you feel the heat of embarrassment creep up your cheeks.

“I know you did. The next time I see you, you’re gonna wear that while I fuck that greedy pussy until you can’t walk right for days, how’s that sound? Maybe then you’ll be satisfied.” You rub your thighs together at his words, smearing the wetness between your legs across your skin and a whine slips from your throat.

“Please,” you whimper. You fingers are edging closer to where you’re dripping, desperate for just a small touch, “Sir, can I please…”

You can hear Dave’s grin through the speaker. “You want to play with yourself? Want to come?”

You hear the rustling of sheets on his side as you breathe out a “Yes, please sir”, desperate for his permission.

It’s silent for a moment like he’s contemplating. “Okay, fine. One finger, nice and slow, sweetheart.” You whine again, your pointer finger dipping down between your folds, swirling through the slick there and moving up to your clit to circle it slowly.

You’re already so worked up that the simple touch makes you gasp, which earns you another groan from Dave. “Always so fucking wet,” he growls, “so eager for everything I give you, so fucking easy… Fuck yourself with it, go on.”

You obediently thrust your finger inside of your slick heat, but it’s not enough, not when you’re used to the way he’s touching you. “I need more, please,” you plead with him, noting how wrecked you already sound.

“Two then, but that’s enough you greedy little thing. You come like this or not at all, are we clear?” he tells you sternly.

You try to replicate the way Dave fingers you, the rough touch of his thick fingers, the way he fills you up. You curl your fingers, but you can’t reach those spots so deep inside of you the way he does, another desperate whine escaping you.

You’re so close but can’t get all the way there, when his own breaths grow louder, mixed with deep groans, and the thought that he’s touching himself to the sounds that you’re making, has probably been doing that the entire time, is enough to finally bring you to the edge.

“Can I come, please sir?” you pant, your thumb rubbing over your clit in quick circles, imagining his more calloused fingertips.

He leaves you dangling for a few more seconds before he roughly commands, “Come for me. Right now.”

You let go, a loud moan filling your dark bedroom as your walls spasm around empty air, more wetness seeping out of you and your body shuddering as you come down from your high.

Judging from his panting breaths, he came right along with you and you’re hit with another wave of longing for him, to be close to him. You roll over onto your side, still holding your phone close to you as you both listen to each other’s breathing slowly evening out.

“I liked this,” you smile and he hums in agreement. You resist the sudden urge to tell him that you miss him, that you want to feel his arms around you and his breath on your neck as you fall asleep. “Good night, Dave,” you mutter instead.

“Good night, sweetheart,” his voice sounds through the speaker. You almost miss the way he quietly adds, “You look beautiful,” and you half assume that you’ve misheard him, but he ends the call before you can ask.

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series masterlist

#the dress series #dave york #dave york x reader #dave york x you #dave york x female reader #dave york x f!reader #dave york smut #dave york fanfiction #the equalizer 2 #pedro pascal #pedro pascal characters #pedro pascal fanfiction #pedro pascal characters fanfiction #pedrostories

[hikari3601]

Take a Step Back

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Pairing | Cyno x Reader

Author’s Note | Al-Haitham’s version will be coming soon!

CW/TW | Mentions of injuries and blood.

Synopsis | When you flinch away from him during an argument.

Arguments with Cyno were rare, to say the least. The both of you often found an agreeable compromise before the argument even started, but today was different. Today was a cold reminder of what his work as a Matra entailed and after having his many wounds disinfected and bandaged you packed away your medical kit with your lips set in a firm line. He was tired, that much was visible in the way his eyes drooped every few seconds, but the man still found the willpower to haul himself up and stride toward the door.

~~

“And where do you think you’re going, General Mahamatra?” Your voice cut through the otherwise silent room with a steady firmness, forcing the man to turn to you, stunned. You never used his title.

“I need to report back-“ He started, his initial shock quickly fading as he turned towards the door again.

“You can do that later. You need to rest your body before you end up tearing your wounds open.” You moved to catch up with him, barricading the door with your frame.

“I’ll rest when I come back.”

“No, you’ll rest now. Patience is a virtue that those old geezers should have mastered by now, they can wait, Cyno."

With a deep sigh, the white-haired man attempted to sidestep you, grunting out a small, “But I can’t.” as he moved, although, he hadn’t gotten far before you were in front of him again -hands stubbornly placed on your hips to hide their slight tremble.

“Cyno, you’re being irrational, I’m not requesting this of you because I’m the bleeding mass of bandages, you are. If you so desperately need to hand in those reports then I’ll go for you. Surely that will be satisfactory?”

“It’s not about satisfaction Y/N.” He groaned, “I have orders to receive and several other pressing issues to discuss, so I need you to step aside.”

“It’ll all be for nothing if you pass out on your way to the Academia, so I need you to turn on your heel, head back into the ward and lie down -please. I don’t want to see you bleeding any longer than you already have.”

The two of you remained unyielding as the argument continued to escalate -your eyes occasionally drifting back to the largest gash across his chest, while his to the exit.

Cyno could have sworn his urgency was visible by now, but his irritation only flared when he saw no end to your relentless demand. His hand itched to twist the door handle just a few feet behind you but he remained rooted where he was, crimson eyes beginning to burn with aggravation knowing that you were right.

The general knew he needed to rest, he had been in this type of situation many times before but those damned Sages were far more painful to deal with than the wounds on his body and that was a truth he couldn’t admit while that Akasha was still nestled against your ear.

To calm his racing mind, he raised a calloused hand to his face, ready to rub the bridge of his nose but froze when he saw your body curl into itself at the motion of his hand.

You flinched, he thought.

You flinched away from him.

He made you feel unsafe.

Your eyes widened, reflecting his, at the disbelief of your very own actions.

“I didn’t mean to Cyno, I don’t know what came over me-“

“I apologise.” He stated, head cast low as if trying to make himself seem less intimidating. “It was never my intention to make you feel afraid, I swear. I’d never hurt you.”

Your mind reeled at the sight as you raced to take him into your arms. “It’s ok, I know you wouldn’t. It’s just stressful having to see you come here so hurt and knowing that you still have more work to do -it’s just the stress, Love. It’s just the stress."

You repeated the words like a mantra -pleading that they carry the rightful certainty that he needed.

He returned your embrace after much time passed -although he held you far more lightly than he usually did. “I’ll go back with you.” He breathed, “I’ll see the Sages tomorrow morning.”

#🍁.content book #genshin impact #genshin fic #genshin impact x reader #genshin impact fanfiction #genshin angst #genshin x reader #genshin #cyno x reader #cyno #cyno angst

[alcestas-sloboda]

I see so many reflections today from different people: someone woke up from the explosions, some from a phone call, some woke up and saw hundreds of notifications from different telegram channels. It is still so unimaginably bizarre. I have no ability to put into words the feeling of your world falling apart and we didn’t even understand half of the danger that was surrounding us. We were so damn close to disaster with half of Europe believing that nothing good will come out of it.

Ukrainians didn’t care what Europeans thought though, I personally saw news pieces about "Russia will take control of Kyiv" a lot later, somewhere in May, when Ukrainian military took control over the north of the country. And I’m so eternally grateful to every Ukrainian who made sure that all this "experts" sat in those flashy studios red from guilt. I’m grateful for my life, I’m grateful for our Ukraine. She persist. She is still the love of our lives. She’s hurt and devastated but she lives despite all the attempts to destroy her. Same as us. Somehow still here.

Yet I feel more detached from the western world than ever and I’m so fucking jealous of you all. It’s not even about the rockets or shakheds - somewhere along the lines you accept the fact that you may die in any moment - it’s about normal things like your Twitter feed that doesn’t look like a necrology, military terms that don’t make any sense to you, your city that doesn’t stop everyday to mourn the dead, you don’t feel guilty for trying to live a normal life while your classmate, who wanted to be a director, posts stories from the trenches. All of that and more. I’m not even entitled to my emotions because there always will be someone who says that my country is not suffering enough. I no longer react to comments like this as emotionally as I’ve done before but it is still so bizarre to see stuff like that from people whose countries have always been the one to inflict suffering on others.

I may sound mean or sarcastic or whatever but there is so much negativity inside of us that was put there by people like I’ve mentioned above that it is going to be released from time to time. "Your country shouldn’t exist", "Only 9 thousand killed", "You all are nazis/racist/zionists/any of the -ist terms" - yet you should always react in a constructive way because the moment you let your emotions go, you are the worst person on the planet. But who am I kidding, some people here do believe that we are. There is a thousand bad people with sketchy patches in a 40-million country and suddenly "That’s why I no longer support Ukraine". Well, honey, that means you never did. Because Syrian flags were quickly replaced with Ukrainian ones and just as quickly with Palestinian. It’s not about the "Support the oppressed", it’s "Anything to not feel guilty" because then you’ll find the reason to hate Palestinians, just as you did with us. If only you cared about the problematic shit happening in you country as much as you care about our political and social life.

But there are people who still are there for us. Countries that are still here. We may not say it as often but we are thankful. So very thankful for everything you’ve done and are doing for us. Thank you for hearing us and uplifting our voices.

Recently one of the most beautiful people here have lost her life defending me and you. She was always in my notes, always making sure that we didn’t feel uncomfortable even if she of all the people had all the right to be upfront about her thoughts and feelings. I don’t think I will ever get rid of the feeling of guilt. She was there while I wasn’t. She said to mourn her through anger. Anger towards the oppressor. Anger that should be directed into something useful: donations, sharing info, contacting your MPs and so on.

The soldier‘s death is not something out of ordinary during the war, it’s not considered a war crime but what if half of the army are civilians? Volunteers who left their homes to protect them. What if the soldier was a teacher, a poet, an actor, an IT-specialist, a scientist, what then? Isn’t it a tragedy? My country is loosing yet another generation of beautiful talented people and it makes my view of the future even darker.

But what can I say? I’m still here. My country still stands. Ukrainian air defence is doing everything possible and impossible to protect the lives of the civilians. Ukrainian military is still the only thing keeping us all alive. Heroes, titans, gods. Glory to them. Eternal glory to those who lost their lives defending Ukraine.

To Ukrainians: якось буде, прорвемся.

#reflection I guess