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#i always thought she'd come to love him if only they had the chance to meet
priceofreedom · 1 month
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#Elmyra approving of Zack makes me so happy 😭 FF7 Rebirth 20 / ?
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Just... I have to get this off my chest for some reason.
One of the reasons I can't stand S*puffy anymore, is because in season two with B*angel, they were trying to tell this story that him becoming her whole world was not a good thing and dangerous. And you can definitely see that in the narrative, like with "A*ngel, when I look to the future all I see is you." And this was a very good thing! This was, really, foreshadowing how even when their relationship was "good" and looked good there was also some foreboding here and, really, they were doomed. And this culminates in the whole A*ngelus arc where at the end she has to kill him to save the world. Because, intentional or not, even when he was A*ngel, she had gotten to this place where she was putting him above her duty (short aside: I don't think A*ngel would have ever wanted that. The opposite, really. He wanted to help her be the Slayer. But they got too wrapped up in each other, and yeah. And like I said, intentional or not, even before he was A*ngelus, maybe it was like he was starting to ask her to choose between him and her responsibilities), and that's why season two had to end the way it did.
This is one of the many things that makes B*uffy the Vampire Slayer good. And B*uffy a good heroine. This is what made the show what it did. And this is, quite arguably, the show at its best.
I remember some quote of Joss Whedon's where, in some ways, he was excited about the supernatural young adult fiction that started coming out around the time of Twilight, including Twilight, starring female characters. He thought that this was a good thing and he wanted to root for them... but as he read them, he felt like the stories were more about "what boyfriend is the girl going to pick." Because when forced with a tough choice, like between the world and her love, the girl would choose her love every single time and would never make the difficult choice, like B*uffy had. In these books, there was no "Buffy" in sight. Keep this in mind for later, please.
Now, in season three of B*uffy the Vampire Slayer, A*ngel does come back. And despite them trying to fight the inevitable numerous times, the two of them do end up dating again. But for the most part, they don't fall into the trap of season two, where they're putting each other above everyone and everything else. They love each other in a much better and healthier way, where they reach the potential they always had (and I feel they're even healthier in later seasons, where B*uffy doesn't do things like be willing to kill F*aith to save A*ngel). But even then, they're still doomed because of A*ngel's curse and know this, and A*ngel leaves.
Enter S*puffy. Now, I'm not even going to get into all the toxic stuff with them--that does bother me, don't get me wrong--that most people (for good reason) talk about with them. I'm here to discuss when they're "good." Including the comics. Which, I'll admit, is them at they're best (which I have enjoyed/did enjoy in the past). And there definitely is some good there.
But what really ticks me off, is that we completely forget the lesson that we learned and preached about in season two. And we start getting into "S*pike" is suddenly all B*uffy sees territory.
In season five, Buffy is faced with the dilemma of having to kill her sister to save the world at the end of the season. And this is one of B*uffy's major breaking points in the show (she goes catatonic after her sister is kidnapped by the goddess looking to murder her). Until season six (when she's ripped out of heaven by her friends) it is her lowest moment in the entire series. And the one thing she will not back down on: that, no: She will not let her sister die to save the world. She's given up so many other people (A*ngel in season two, for instance) and things (like her sanity, safety and peace of mind. Heck, she's already died once at this point). But this is the one sacrifice she won't make. And at the last seconds of the season--since she and her sister have the same blood (D*awn was created from her)--she realizes that she can die instead, and makes that sacrifice.
But then, all of a sudden, in season seven, B*uffy's saying that now she's changed and if she did have to make such a choice again--if there were no other option--she would sacrifice D*awn to save the world, but she won't sacrifice S*pike?! What the fuck?
I feel like no writing decision has ever pissed me off more than this, as the season five arc was one of my favorites in the show (maybe even more than the A*ngelus one, or tied with it). I was completely on B*uffy's side with the D*awn thing in season five and respected her for it, and they just threw it in the trash in season seven. And as someone who loves her own sister more than anything, and would definitely feel this same way as B*uffy, I take this personally.
Furthermore, remember that Joss Whedon quote from before that I told you to recall? Congratulations Joss and writers, you are now doing what you criticized in other authors: Having a heroine willing to let the world burn, but not her boyfriend! But she suddenly will let her sister burn, but not her boyfriend? That's vile!
And we're going backwards here. In season two, B*uffy realized why having her boyfriend be her whole world and cloud her judgement was a bad thing... and what? Now we're saying it's not? Or that it's okay with S*pike?!
Which gets me into another issue I have with S*puffy, that I made a post about (that I didn't even get even go into as deeply with as I could've/should've), that the writers started doing this thing where something they said was bad with B*angel was somehow okay with S*puffy. Which makes absolutely no sense. And could even get near a "S*pike is a Gary-Stu" level.
And it doesn't even stop with the D*awn thing. As others have pointed out, in season seven the S*coobies could have gotten seriously injured and S*pike has, like, a scratch on his lip (I'm exaggerating, I know, but the point stands) and B*uffy runs to him. He's a vampire! He has magical healing and is fine! Priorities, woman!
And there's this part in the comics where S*pike thinks that his great-great-great grandsire is going to possess him, and that he's going to become a real threat to B*uffy (that he might even lose his soul) and that she should probably just kill him for her and the world's safety (which, hey: is admirable. Major points to Spike here!:D). And B*uffy doesn't even take this seriously at all. (There's even this great part where she says something along the lines of, "You were a good person without a soul. If you lose your soul, you will be again and I'll just help you find your way again." But somehow, they also end up talking about his attempted rape of her when he was soulless and B*uffy goes, "That wasn't really you." Buffy, authors, you just contradicted yourself in, like, three breaths. You can't have it both ways. Which one is it?) But he does end up being controlled... and Buffy doesn't end up fighting him at all! All of the S*coobies are like, "What the hell are you doing?" as he's attacking her. But Buffy decides to take the risky chance of trying to get through to him with the power of love, and of course it ends up working out for them! This is not the B*uffy, nor the B*uffy the Vampire Slayer, I know and love. And of course when this ends up happening to A*ngel later on, they go about things differently for him. Ugh. (Another S*puffy issue I have: the point where the writers really started handing him his wildest dreams on a silver platter, while A*ngel and B*angel got nothing but suffering and trauma).
And then we have people like Stacey Abrams saying that A*ngel was good for B*uffy when she was discovering her power, but S*pike was good for her when she became the power. To me, it looks like S*pike made her weak AF, clouded her judgement--almost made her feel like a different character to me, after a point (especially in the comics, where she was making stupid decisions at points. Like the aforementioned risky power of love move)--and forget long, hard lessons she'd already learned.
Let's also not forget that a lot of times in the show that whenever they tried to push S*puffy, they had to do so by isolating Buffy from all of her friends.
And everyone likes to write home about S*pike's relationships with, like, J*oyce and D*awn and certain S*coobies. But eventually we lost those, too, to try and push S*puffy.
Buffy is definitely S*pike's whole world, which isn't healthy at all, which I'd say even takes away from his character and becomes his whole character in a lot of ways... especially in the comics. (The Buffyngton Post on YouTube has a lot of funny videos about the comics--and he's a huge fan of the comics, so it's not like he's hating on them or anything like that--where he pokes fun at everyone's entire role in the season. And a lot of times for S*pike, it'll be things like, "Show up at the end of the season with little to no bearing on the plot." And/or "Here to be B*uffy's boyfriend." And he's not a S*pike or S*puffy hater or anything like that. I feel like season 10, and arguably season 11 [or parts of it] is the only time this didn't happen. And The Buffyngton Post had the fear as the comics were coming out, that if S*pike became B*uffy's boyfriend in them, that he would lose all agency and just be Buffy's BoyfriendTM, with no arcs whatsoever. And that did kind of happen. Granted, this may moreso be an issue with the comics' writing as a whole. As the B*uffy the Vampire Slayer comics weren't the greatest. The A*ngel & F*aith ones were definitely better, for instance. But still.)
People complained when it seemed like this was the case for A*ngel in the early seasons of B*TVS (him just being B*uffy's vampire boyfriend, essentially). But then he got his own show, his own life, and friends. At a certain point, after S*pike falls in love with B*uffy, you rip her out of his life... and I honestly have no idea what he would do, where he would go, or what his story would be. Like in season twelve, when they've broken up. Which I guess is why it's a good thing that we really don't see much of that, and have a time skip. We jump right to when they're forced to interact again to fight an apocalypse. S*pike says that in that time he did some detective work with Dowling during their time apart, which I can buy, but it's still not a lot to go off of. Which is kind of the point and kind of my whole issue here.
Case and point: B*angel actually better adheres to the important theme that the B*uffy writers put in early in the show, and should have stuck to, then S*puffy.
Also... I am not looking for a ship war or argument here. This is me just getting these feelings off my chest (that's why I didn't tag anything and censored everything, because I'm hoping it doesn't show up anywhere and just stays on my blog, really). Anyone here who replies or reblogs this fighting, I will not reply and will probably instantly block you, etc. I'm sorry, but it's just the way it is. This is really me venting.
#rape mention#rape tw#trigger warning#there's also in the comics how b*uffy isn't willing to kill s*pike in that moment (after he suggests it. when it might be safer)#but then only doesn't let x*ander kill a*ngel after the twilight stuff because she doesn't want him to become a killer -sighs-#and i mean... a*ngel did AWFUL stuff as twilight so maybe i get that. but dang. but also he was possessed. so wtf?#also i do get that b*uffy didn't want to kill a*ngel. and if she had a better option she'd always want to find it. but if there's a good#chance this IS the better option? and she said she'd be willing to kill dawn now? so idek what to think#also... if i'm being honest. if i'd watched b*uffy when i was younger. i'd probably be all over s*puffy. since he just LOVES HER SO MUCH#but coming into it as an adult? i just... really don't care. it's not enough for me. and there are way more important things#i feel like a*ngel surely DOES love buffy that much but he doesn't let it outweigh his judgement. which joss said originally is the kind of#story he's looking for and appreciates. but then went back on#also that's why he and b*uffy are better suited for each other imo. because they're the same that way#also i do know b*uffy could be lying about saying that she only wants x*ander to not kill a*ngel so he won't be a murderer#like in knowing that that's the only way to not get him to kill him#because if he thought she was trying to stop him because she still loved him after ALL OF THAT. that would be a thing to get x*ander to#kill him for sure#it could be that. though sadly it might be the infuriating first option. since i don't trust the buffy writers (especially comic writers)#as far as i can throw them when it comes to a*ngel and b*angel it could very well be the first one#long post
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yamujiburo · 2 months
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I get the feeling that Ash gets his pokemon trainer talent from his mother (making his father even more of a deadbeat failure in the main series timeline)- but Delia never really had a chance to figure out and use this talent.
This is more or less canon! The novel talks about how badly she wanted to be a trainer but her mother didn’t let her when she was 10. In the show, there’s a couple instances where she battles (really well) and Ash’s friends comment that “that’s where Ash got it from”
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“Hanako herself loved Pokémon and wished she could have become a trainer too.
If she didn't have to take over Masara House as the only daughter of her family, Hanako would have ignored any opposition from her mother and left home to become a Pokémon Trainer when she was ten, just like Satoshi.
When becoming a Pokémon Trainer, it's always better to start young.
But it's not too late to start as a teenager.
If there was anyone else who could take over Masara House, Hanako would have left it to them and left town.
She hadn't given up yet.
However...
When she was 18... While Hanako's mother was still alive.
There was a young man hoping to become a Pokémon Trainer who stayed at Masara House and she fell in love. The relationship escalated quickly and in practically the blink of the eye they were married.
And then in another blink of the eye, the young man left town, never to return again.
And in yet another blink of the eye, her mother fell ill and passed away, leaving her with only Masara House and the newborn Satoshi.
If you were to ask her if she still loved that young man... Satoshi's father... her answer would be a flat “no”.
After leaving a woman like Hanako alone for over ten years, she wouldn't even get mad at him if he returned, she'd simply ignore him outright.
Up until the day Satoshi left home on a journey to become a Pokémon Trainer, Hanako had hung in there all by herself.
It's only natural... Hanako thought to herself.
Satoshi was her beloved child. She'd take care of him until the day he left. It was her responsibility.
Hanako had decided to continue doing her best on her own... But in the morning, Satoshi would finally be leaving.
She was sad to see Satoshi leave home, yet also somewhat excited.
... When the morning comes, I'll be free. I'm still in my twenties... It's a bit too late to become a Pokémon Trainer, but there's lots of things I could do.
Hanako briefly reconsidered the hundreds of proposals she'd rejected... Ahaha... I'd rather not... Lalala.
Hanako felt like a student about to start a summer vacation without any homework.
She then came to her senses.
Satoshi isn't leaving until the morning. She had to keep being his mother up until then.
Hanako nodded to herself and said “yeah”.”
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oncloudten · 1 year
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if he's a serial killer, then what's the worst that could happen to a girl who's already hurt?
ethan landry x fem!reader. scream 6 spoilers. cw: choking, mentions of sex, murder, slight dirty talk.
read part ii. here
"get the fuck off me, you sick fuck!" you managed to get out, barely breathing.
he had you completely fooled. the boy with the puppy dog eyes and the sweetest smile. every horror film has a sweet little dorky cliche virgin, and he chose to embody that role perfectly. ethan landry.
though, the virgin part wouldn't be true. and you have yourself to thank for that.
who would have thought? well, maybe mindy. oh god. she'll kill you for this– if they don't first. if he doesn't.
all those nights you spent with ethan, all those days. everytime you'd tell tara and mindy about him and your massive crush on him, and then eventually the friends-with-benefits thing you had going on, she'd try to offer you her enthusiasm and be the supportive best-friend that she usually is to you, but it would always be followed by heartfelt speeches of her telling you to "be careful" and that she doesn't trust him. she never did like him from the start.
but you weren't worried about mindy right now, you couldn't. not when ethan had such a tight grip around your neck, and your friends were somewhere in this building being chased by his family.
"hmm? i thought you liked it when i did this, princess." ethan smirks, trailing his knife on your cheeks.
asshole. of course he'd say that. because why wouldn't he? he knew everything about you. you had given yourself to him completely– in every way. something so private being used against you– someone so... wicked knowing such intimate and delicate things about you, that no one else does. you can't process anything. "t-that means nothing."
he let go of your neck, but only slightly to stop choking you. he's towering over you, pushing you up against a wall. "didn't seem like that a few nights ago when you were begging for it, you dirty fucking slut."
"fuck you."
"oh, i'd love to. but i got my hands bloody full right now. oh and, been there, done that." he says, proudly. there is something so sinister about his smile. his killer smile. "come on, you sweet dumb thing. lighten up a bit, won't you? you look like you've seen a ghost."
"if you're going to kill me, just fucking do it. why the fuck bring me here? kill me and get it over with." there's no telling what he's going to do. he has you completely isolated from sam and tara. and chad is gone— you found ethan when you were forcibly seperated when ghostface showed up, and it immediately clicked.
"oh no no no no no, you sweet pretty thing. i love sticking things in you, but i would never stick a knife in you. never hurt you. well, i mean, kill you. it's your friends that we're after." he pauses for a bit. "well that wouldn't be right to say either. it is sam and tara that we want," he inches closer to you, "but it just feels so fucking good to kill. so fucking good baby."
"you're sick."
"and you love me. isn't that what you were telling mindy and quinn a few weeks ago? hmm?"
fuck. what are the fucking chances of that wicked witch being his literal fucking sister? "that was before i found out you are the one who is actively trying to kill my best fucking friends, you dimwitted fucking asshole!"
he lets out a low chuckle. "if it makes you feel any better. you're the closest thing i'll ever get to love in this world. i do love you. well, god, did i love fucking you. y'gave me the best sex of my life. but it was more than that."
"stop. just stop. let me go." you beg, "let me go please, ethan. i'll just go- just my friends, my- chad, please."
"i can't do that, angel. my job is to keep you away from them. protect you, even. see, my lovely sister thought it'd be funny to kill you. claims you're just baggage. that it would hurt sam and tara the most because you're practically the closest thing they have to family. but i can't let that happen. so this is the next best thing."
and then all you see is black.
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cupid-styles · 16 days
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golf (sugar daddy h)
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word count: 1.3k
content warnings: spicy but no smut, dirty talk, degradation, exhibitionism if you squint
sugar daddy h masterlist | main masterlist
talk to me
. . .
Mia doesn't care about golf. 
Not once in her life has she ever thought it was a fascinating sport. There are some sports, like hockey or baseball, that, at the very least, seem hot, if not a little attractive, but golf isn't one of those. 
And of course, Harry loves to golf.
It's nothing against him, really. If she's being honest, in her eyes, golf is a rich man's sport. Since they started seeing each other months ago, Harry has always made it a point to go golfing at least once a week. He has a membership to a country club nearby and either goes by himself, with his friends, or takes business partners there, where they spend the day drinking and hitting balls and whatever else wealthy people do at country clubs.
Mia wouldn't know because she's never gone and, quite frankly, she never wants to go. 
She adores Harry. She really, truly does, but being a frequent attender of the country club to play such a silly, boring sport just serves as another class barrier between them. Harry grew up going to golf camp, for crying out loud! Mia spent her summers working at the local ice cream shop, where she got paid $7 an hour to get yelled at by angry parents because she was only allowed to let their kids taste three flavors before they had to buy something.
So when Harry asks if she wants to spend her Saturday golfing with him at the club, she tries to come up with a million excuses as to why she can't. But because he's him, and he has a pretty face and a soothing voice and he threw in the prospect of spoiling her with a massage at the spa after they finished their game, she can't find it in her to say no. 
Harry has a business dinner the night before so Mia sleeps at her own place, which she's kind of surprised with, to be honest. (She anticipated him asking her to stay over so she didn't have a chance to get out of it.) Even despite the text he sent her at 11:40 pm to let her know that he got home safely (that's basically 2 am in Harry time), he shows up to her house in his golf clothes at 9 am on the dot, breakfast and coffee in hand. 
Mia has to physically drag herself out of bed to let him in, a scowl on her face, even though he went out of his way to go to her favorite bagel shop. 
"Morning, grumpy," he greets cheekily, smushing a kiss to her cheek. He doesn't even bother toeing his shoes off like he normally does, instead giving her bum a soft pat when she turns back around, "We have reservations at the club for 10, so you should go get dressed. You can eat in the car."
"Are you sure you want me to go?" Mia asks, and Harry has to ignore the slight hopefulness to her tone, "I've never even played golf before, I don't think I'll be very good—"
"It's not about being good, honey, I just want to spend the day with you. Show you off, y'know?" he leans forward to press a kiss to her temple before ducking down to catch her ear. "Now be good and go get dressed."
He doesn't catch the narrowing of her eyes as she reluctantly heads back to her bedroom, where she grabs the stupid golf outfit he insisted on buying her for this very occasion. She told him she was fine with wearing leggings and a tee-shirt, but he explained to her that there was a certain etiquette that came with golf, which included clothing. (Like Mia said, it's a rich man's sport.) So he bought her a short little skirt and a workout top and, if she's being frank, she's not sure if it's not more for him than it is for the game itself. 
She tried it on a few days ago when he brought it over and she batted at his chest when she saw the length of the skirt on her — unlike those trendy workout skorts that had spandex shorts underneath, the pleats of the one Harry purchased barely went down to the tops of her thighs. With a grumble, she said she'd just wear boyshorts to make sure no one "saw the goods."
But now that she's getting dressed for their golf day, she thinks she has a better idea. 
. . . 
Mia sucks at golf.
Harry keeps trying to encourage her and help her, but they're on hole 8 of 18, and she's exhausted. It's warm, she's sweaty, and Harry's beating her ass in the game. (What else would you expect from someone who spent their summer vacations playing every day?) 
"You got this, baby," he says, giving her waist a small squeeze as they approach hole nine. She rolls her eyes from behind her sunglasses, rolling out her wrist in an effort to get rid of the cramps. "Do you still need me to help you?"
Just as she's about to say yes, she remembers the impulsive decision she made this morning. And she realizes she knows exactly how to get this game to end. 
"Actually, I think I can do it," she replies with a smile, jumping out from the golf cart. "Will you just stand behind me and make sure I'm doing it right?"
Harry's pleasantly surprised but nods his head, a zip of enthusiasm firing through his chest. He follows her out and stands with his hands on his hips as she sets herself up, trying to find her stance. 
Per Harry's instructions, she leans over just slightly, a small bend in her knees. And that's when he sees it. 
She's not wearing anything underneath her skirt. 
"Mia," he growls, ambling towards her to cover her from behind, "What the fuck do you think you're doing?"
"Um, I think it's called teeing off? That's what you said, anyway—"
"Not that," he mutters, a protective hand squeezing her hip. He glances around them to make sure no one's watching them as his fingers dance down to the hem of her skirt, gently pulling it down. "Why aren't you wearing any underwear, Mia?"
"Ohhhh, that?" she asks, turning in his grasp. "I must've forgotten them. I'm sorry."
She has a look of false innocence on her face, her eyes rounded slightly and her lips pouted as if she was truly making a genuine apology. He's seething — he wants nothing more than to bend her over his knee and issue loud, harsh smacks to her ass, but he thinks she would like that too much. 
"You're such a fucking slut." he mumbles angrily, his jaw clenching. He grabs the golf club from her hand and uses his other to yank her back in the direction of the golf cart, a surprised yelp sounding from her mouth. "Are you that much of a brat that you've been walking around with your pussy out all day?"
She shrugs nonchalantly as she climbs into the golf cart. Harry rolls his eyes and shifts the key into the ignition, starting the machine back up. 
"Guess you'll just have to take me home, then," Mia replies with a sigh. Harry snorts and shakes his head. 
"You fucking wish," he says. She blinks at him. "No, baby. I'm gonna take you into one of those private bathrooms, edge you until you're crying, and then we're gonna finish this game."
Mia's eyes widen, shifting uncomfortably in her seat as he drives over a bump in the road. 
"Good thing I brought that nifty little remote control vibrator with me," he continues with a smirk. "Had a feeling you'd be a fuckin' brat today."
Mia doesn't know if she's ever regretted something so much before.
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mimicmimikyuwrites · 2 months
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A New Beginning - Lucifer (Hazbin Hotel) x Fem!Reader
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Summary: The birth of your daughter with Lucifer brings some of his fears to the surface as he meets her for the first time, but you're there to help him.
Contents/Possible Warnings: Fluff, some angst, but mostly fluff
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The moment she came into the world you knew you'd always love her. Your sweet baby girl looked a lot like her father, and while she had gotten your eyes, everything else seemed to have come from Lucifer. She had the most stunning golden hair you had ever seen, and the lighter streaks of blonde running through it only added to her beauty. Her chubby little cheeks were the most adorable shade of a bright, rosy red, and when she smiled you felt a happiness stronger than you had ever experienced before.
She was perfect.
"God, she looks so much like Charlie when she was born." Gently leaning over, Lucifer held out a finger, and your daughter grabbed onto it, curious eyes looking up at him. "Hi, my baby," he cooed, gently taking her from you, and holding her in his arms. "You're so precious."
You melted at the sight, a warmth filling you as you watched the scene in front of you. He was being careful with her, almost as if he was afraid she'd break at any moment, and the soft way he spoke to her made you fall in love with him all over again. You had always thought you made the right choice all those months ago when you asked him to have a baby with you, and your belief only grew as you looked at them.
"Darling?" Lucifer asked you. "Are you crying?"
You sniffled, nodding in response. It was beautiful. The two loves of your life in front of you had brought you to tears of joy. You loved them so, so much. "I'm just so happy, Lucifer. You're such a great dad."
Your husband looked away, avoiding your gaze, smiling sadly. "I'm not—I could've–" He sighed, unable to find the words. He handed her back to you, and you tilted your head slightly in confusion as he took a few steps back and began to nervously fidget with his cane.
"I could've done better with Charlie." He looked at your baby, the same sad, pained smile on his face. "I'm probably going to fuck up with this one, too." He let out a small, humorless, bitter laugh. You frowned.
"Lucifer, honey." You motioned for him to come closer, and he did, letting you hold his face in one of your hands. "Not all of it's your fault, okay?" You reassured him. He had told you about Lilith, and how she would distance him from Charlie, and how that ultimately helped lead up to his current, rocky father-daughter relationship with her.
He fought back tears. "I–I know you're not Lilith, but–fuck—I'm scared that the same thing's gonna happen, or that I'll screw up some other way. I want to be a good father. I need to be a good father. For her."
"And you will be." You promised. "I can already tell how much you love her, and I know you'll do an amazing job. Think of this as a new beginning for you. A chance to do even better."
He frowned, still filled with self-doubt, but nodded in agreement. This would be a new start for him, and he wouldn't waste his chance. His frown turned into a grin as your daughter reached out her tiny hands towards him, wanting to be held by her father again, and he gladly took her from you.
"Oh!" He said suddenly, letting out a small laugh as he realized something. "We never gave her a name!" He was right. Amid all the emotions, both good and bad, you had both managed to forget about her name.
"What should we—"
"Stella." You decided, cutting him off. She was your little star, your bright light in the darkness, and the cosmic-themed name fit her excellently. A wonderful name for the wonderful little girl you had brought into the world.
"Stella." He said, testing the name out. "I like it." He smiled down at her. "I'll be the best dad you could ever ask for, Stella. I promise."
You knew he wouldn't let her down. She was his new beginning, and he'd stay true to his word.
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ethereal-night-fairy · 2 months
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Silver Tongues, like Bullets
Chapter 3
Werewolf!141 x Female Reader
So maybe you weren't the spy they thought you were..That just meant they had to find others reasons to keep you...
Warnings: MDNI, dark themes, manipulation, lying and gaslighting, drugging, humiliation, kidnapping, non-con touching, non-con looking, forced proximity, forced nudity, groping, manhandling, panty stealing, poly 141 taking care of reader, reader is bedridden for a while, she needs help with everything...and I mean everything, some religious themes, reader comes from a religious household, sorry if a missed any.
Happy valentine's day everyone I know technically valentine's day is almost over but better late than never. Comments and reblogs appreciated 💗
Silver Tongues like Bullets Masterlist
Masterlist
Words: 5.1k
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-24/11/2023 11:00am
The cabin was pleasantly warm, the air carrying notes of burning cedar throughout the rooms. The fog had cleared up but no one was in the mood to leave the cabin. Even Soap decided to stay in, which was surprising. He’d be the first to take any chance to run in his wolf form. But since you left a little over an hour ago things didn't feel the same. The cabin felt colder, emptier, not as lively as before. Soap was gazing out the window from his place beside Simon who was on the laptop still going through your emails and social media trying to find information. They've both been mopey since your departure though Simon hid it pretty well. Price felt the same; he was much better at hiding it though. It was so odd how infatuated with you they had become. Yet the older two would never admit it…not yet anyways.
They received a call from Laswell in the early hours with an update. She hadn't found anything useful but she said she'd keep searching and call later. Price had caught Simon gazing at your sleeping form when he woke to take the call, though he had decided not to say anything to the brooding man. They all acted normal when you woke up, trying their best to get you to eat breakfast with them. But you were evasive and skittish, asking to leave as soon as possible. It seemed you had caught on that they drugged you. Your scared expression made Gaz and Soap heart ache since you didn't talk to them like you did yesterday. All they wanted to do was hold and cuddle you but it was too soon for that. Just as Gaz was about to make an excuse. Simon had chimed in and said that the hot chocolate was meant for him since he didn't like taking his pills straight. You looked surprised when he had spoken to you but accepted the lie without question. You really needed some common sense knocked into you…or fucked into you...preferably fucked into you…they'll get to it eventually. You still refused to eat breakfast though and waited patiently for them to be done.
The rest of the plan went smoothly enough. You seemed upset when the truck had ‘broken’ down but didn't make a fuss about it. Rather you just asked for directions to find your way home alone. Even accepted their lie about having no reception on their phones without even checking them. That’s when the real plan kicked in and Gaz grabbed a map insisting on taking you back to the hiking trails himself as an ‘apology’.
Since then Gaz has been keeping Price updated through sneaky texts sent here and there. And Soap only just quieted down trying to convince the other two men to keep you. It’s not that Simon and Price didn't want to keep you because they definitely did. Imagining you in their shared countryside home was an absolute dream come true. Thinking about coming home to your loving arms after a long mission would fix their souls. But kidnapping you wasn't the answer, it wouldn't exactly make you trust them now would it? It was better to do it the proper way. Though they had to leave soon they could always come back and try to court you properly. If the infatuation with you stays, that is. Price was still convinced that this reaction they were all feeling was because they haven't been around anyone but themselves and Laswell for a really long time. You were a change of pace, something new, something exciting, something for the boys to sink their teeth into. For now they all waited patiently for Laswell's call. When the *ping* rings out throughout the living room, everyone's head snaps to the phone sitting on the coffee table. Soap lunges for the phone first but before he can text Gaz for pictures Price takes it from him.
Gaz: Arrived at the lake. She's upset and crying thinking we both got lost even with a map. It's kinda cute ngl. Any updates?
Price: Not yet. Should be soon. Keep her calm.
Gaz: 👍🏽
The phone rings not a second later which Price immediately picks up
Laswell: Nothing was found John. She's just a civvie from a religious family. Nothing to be worried about. It's a small town where she lives in doubt anyone would believe her if she said anything. There's a couple recent facebook posts from her parents shunning her. Claiming she ran away to join a city cult or something. And a bunch of older ones just insulting her for her choice in career. Apparently they wanted her to marry a youth pastor but she had rejected him and gone to college instead which upset them. They've been quiet since she began depositing majority of her paychecks into their accounts but a fight broke out recently when she told them she accepted a job offer in London. Her story checks out she wasn't lying. I do feel kinda bad for her though. It seemed like they had kicked her out. Poor girl probably has nowhere to go even when she makes it back into town.
Price thanks Laswell before hanging up. This…this changes everything…Soap and Ghost are on him instantly but he just holds his hand up as he texts Gaz a new plan of action.
Price: Bring her back by whatever means. We're keeping her… (message not sent)
Price tries several times to send the message but it doesn't work. A cold sweat runs down Price's forehead as he forces himself to stay calm for the sake of his lovers. As their captain in situations like these they were relying on him. Dread and panic sets into the other two as they scramble to their phones trying to call Gaz but it never connects. Immediately Price tells Ghost to track Gaz’s chipped necklace on the laptop after 10 minutes of calls not going through. Soap is pacing the room ready to bolt into the forest any second now as Ghost works frantically to get the screen to load up. Price waits patiently with his hands clenched. This was like that sedative incident all over again. The fear, the pain, the looming destruction of their pack, of his lovers was something he never wanted to face again. He had promised himself he wouldn't let it happen again. That he wouldn't allow them to be taken away from him. He was second away from calling Laswell screaming at her that her intel was wrong that they had got his boy. But the screen finally loads up. They stare at it shocked, not really comprehending what it was showing them. It showed Gaz's location right at the cabin but he couldn't get back in such a short time unless he was running in wolf form. They all ran to go check the treeline to see what was chasing him. There's no way that they think they'll go down without a fight.
They all burst out the cabin door, almost taking it off the hinges. Their body's heating, muscles bulging ready to tear their clothes right off them. But they stand there in shock as Gaz breaks through the treeline not fully in wolf form but not entirely human either. His eyes were glowing amber as heat radiated off his defined muscle. His clothes were ripped where his muscles bulged too much but he was cradling something close to his chest.
They ran, meeting him halfway as he shifted back slowly. He collapsed onto the grass as he called out for help. As they got closer they realised he was drenched and he was holding your unconscious body. You looked paler than before, the colour completely drained from your lips. Your clothes were soaked through and clinging to your body. Your jacket was missing too.
Price is on Gaz in an instant helping him get up as Ghost takes your unconscious form from him bolting inside as Soap goes to get Gaz a towel. Everything was frantic for the next few minutes. They didn't have time to ask questions, they just went off instinct as they moved around getting things ready for a warm bath.
Price brought Gaz to your room as Ghost began stripping you of your wet clothes. You weren't responsive and your body was very cold which concerned the men. They needed to get you warmed up as soon as possible.
“Soap get the bath ready!”, Ghost shouted over his shoulder as he tried his best not to ogle as he peeled your bagging clothes off your beautiful body. Ghost threw your wet clothes and panties to the side as he took your soft body into his arms, instructing Soap to go put them out to dry. Price begins stripping Gaz as they reach the bathroom. He seemed to be in need of a warm bath too. The poor lad looked shaken. He'll wait before asking questions. Once everything was in order Gaz settled into the tub waiting for Ghost to lower your body onto his. Ghost did so though a bit reluctantly. He didn't seem to want to let you go.
-
Before you lost consciousness all you felt was the prickle of cold water entering your lungs. You watched as the blue liquid engulfed your vision as you felt yourself sinking deeper into the depths of the lake. Your limbs had locked up the second you touched the water. The cold penetrating through your clothing, freezing your skin over. Your last breath comes out in strained bubbles as you try in a last ditch effort to call for help. Was this how you were going to die? Was this the end of everything? You hadn't even had your first kiss yet…you hadn't even begun to experience life. Sad thoughts run through your head as your vision began to blur.
-
Your eyes are forced awake by the feeling of your body being submerged in liquid fire. The smell of pine and mint wafts through the humid air making your head spin. You open your teary eyes to find yourself in a tub. You watch someone leave the bathroom as two strong arms wrapped around your naked body. They massage your waist, running fingers up your sternum between your breasts. You try moving your mouth but your muscles are tense and sore. You feel your head spin from the whiplash in temperatures you're experiencing. You watch as someone gently tilts your head back as they run their sudsy fingers through your hair alleviating some of the pain you're feeling. Price meets your eyes with a gentle smile as Gaz holds your body closer to his. You feel the hard muscles of his chest on your back, as well as his toned arms wrapping around you to keep you warm. You try moving your mouth again but your body feels like lead. You tried desperately to tell them not to touch you so casually. That you needed to go home but nothing came out of your mouth apart from gentle moans and whimpers. They just shush and coo at you as your eyes become heavy with fatigue again, not before catching the end of some conversation Soap was having.
“Put her in my clothes.. they'll fit her the best…no I don't know where her panties went…I swear I don't have the-…”
Then everything fades into black as you let the warm fingers massaging your head lull you to sleep.
-25/11/2023 03:00am
The cabin was dead quiet as you finally managed to peel your eyes awake from your exhaustion. You feel your head pounding. Everything felt fuzzy as if you were in a dream. The prickly pain from hunger was gnawing away at your stomach causing you to stir from your fever induced sleep. The only sounds you hear is of the wind blowing through the trees and of wolves howling. Wolves? There shouldn't be wolves in this forest. You don't think they're native to the area. It reminds you of the fever dream you had when Gaz had rescued you. He looked like a beast but that couldn't be true…right? You were probably hallucinating since too much lake water entered your system. Nothing felt real, nothing felt tangible. You weren't even sure you were alive anymore.
You don't know how long you've been asleep for. But your body felt like a dead weight. You feel like your limbs are tied down but you know they aren't. It's just extremely difficult to move with the burning fever raging through your body. You felt hot and sticky, wanting to get this thick duvet of your body to let the sweat dry.
It seems like your prayers are answered as you hear the front door open and some feet shuffling in. You'll have to ask the men for some help, it doesn't seem like you'd be able to move properly any time soon. Hopefully their truck was fixed so they could drop you back home tomorrow. You were supposed to be at work today, you didn't want to leave a bad impression before you left for London in two weeks time. Maybe this was all a dream and you'll wake up in your own bed after this nightmare ends.
You hear someone enter your room but it was too dark to see. You try saying something but your throat is bone dry and it just comes out in croaks. The person just shushes you as they peel the duvet gently off your body. You enjoy the cold air for a second. Letting it dry your clammy skin. What you don't enjoy is their hands starting to roam your body as they peel away the shirt you're wearing. You whine as you protest to the best of your ability but they don't stop. It's only when the light flicks on that your blurry vision clears after a second. Your eyes meet with Soap who's stripping you like he's done it before and has no problem seeing you naked. He smiles and coos at you while you try to get him to stop. When Ghost walks in with a basin and wash cloth his eyes are unreadable and then you understand why they're stripping you.
But you don't want them touching you, you're able to clean yourself you try to say but nothing comes out. Why did they feel so comfortable with touching you however they wanted? They weren't like this when you first met them. You were already upset by the fact they had put you in a tub with Gaz without your permission. They were taking their hospitality too far. You just wanted to go home. You hoped your parents weren't too mad at you. Maybe they've sent someone looking for you by now. The situation with these men was proving to be dangerous. You had a horrible feeling that they were stalling for time. They could have just dropped you into town if the truck was fixed, if not they could've called emergency services somehow. But wasn't like you have the energy to argue with them.
You can't do much as you're stripped bare. Tears cloud your vision as you beg them to stop in your hoarse voice but it comes out intelligible. You watch as they coo at you carefully wiping your tears and sweat away. Soap is sitting beside your head whispering reassuring words as you cry from the humiliation of watching Ghost run the warm wet cloth over your underarms, body and mound. Making sure to pay extra attention to your folds as he cleans in between them. You squirm as you cry louder making your already hoarse voice worse.
“Come on hen.. thare’s nae need to cry like that..we just want tae help ye.” Soap wipes your tears away as he nuzzles into your neck while Ghost dries you. You watch as Ghost takes off the hoodie he's wearing to put on your naked body. The smell of his aftershave hits you instantly as he gathers you in his arms while carrying you towards the bathroom. You stop crying seeing no point in tiring yourself out but the sniffles are hard to control. Why were they doing this to you? He places you on the toilet, making sure to gather the hoodie above your waist so you don't end up soiling it. This is by far the most humiliating situation you've ever been in your life. You bend over trying to hide you private parts from their view. Yes you needed to pee but they could at least leave you so you could do your business. They didn't seem to take the hint even with you glaring at them.
But Soap took your slumping figure as indication of your fatigue and decided he'll help you sit straight while you do you business. You claw at his arms with your full strength not that you had much but you definitely left marks as you hear him hiss. He didn't seem angry though and Ghost just watched intensely as you tried to hold in your pee.
“It ok hen..just do your business we'll clean ye after…nae need tae worry…”
“You need to hurry love…the food will get cold if you keep refusing to pee…I know you don't like it here…we'll take you home once you're feeling better…”, Tears slip past your waterline again as you do as your told not being able to hold your bladder any longer. Your cheeks heat from mortification rather than your fever, as the two men encourage you while Ghost goes to grab some tissue and water to wipe you clean. God please let this be a dream…a very very bad dream.
-25/11/2023 08:00pm
When you awake this time it's to throw up again. It's dark still you don't if you've be asleep for a couple minutes or for many hours. It seems like you can't catch the sun anymore. You didn't like the dark. It made everything feel oppressive and sinister. You don't know what's wrong but any food smell causes your stomach to churn. And the second the smell of meat came through your door you were fighting to keep the bile at bay. You get up on shaky legs to go to the bathroom to throw up. Your stomach felt like it was trying to turn itself inside out. When was the last time you ate? There’s only a chalky residue left on your tongue probably from the medication they gave you. But when did they give it to you? You can't remember anything. Your memories and nightmares were starting to blur together making everything feel like a drug induced hallucination.
Your muscles were sore and you weren't able to stay steady on your feet without the help from the wall as you walked along. You look down to find your clothes have changed again. Maybe you've just been hallucinating the bad encounters you've been having.
There's no way they would watch you pee or force you to take a bath with them right? Or constantly strip you to wipe away sweat right? You think you might have thrown up in your crying fits but you can't remember much. Yeah it was probably just an awful dream. There's no way they would have dealt with your tantrums and or cleaned up the mess you made. Men aren't like that. Your father certainly isn't. He never took care of your mother when she was sick. It was always you or your siblings. They probably just changed you and left you to rest with some painkillers. Even doing that was more than what most men would do so you should be thankful they were looking after you. But you wished they'd just get you home somehow. It must be some strong painkillers you can't seem to remember anything in too much detail. Like everything was blurring into one colour. You needed to cleanse your system before you pass out again.
You just about make it to the toilet bowl as your insides decide they don't want to stay inside anymore. Your stomach muscles strain and tense as your body tries to dispel the drugs you've been fed recently. The bitter taste of bile and something else was sour on your tongue. You don't even have a proper recollection of what happened in the last two days…
You feel a warm hand brush your hair out of your face as you continue to throw up. An odd feeling filled your chest… you were never taken care off like this before..It caused something warm to stir in your heart. Your head was still fuzzy so you didn't register someone holding water to your lips when you're done. It's like you're on autopilot. One second you're rinsing your mouth the next you're in bed with Gaz who's cradling your head to his chest. He coos and shushing you as he feeds you little pieces of bread with butter…At least it wasn't meat…your sure you'd throw up again if it was…
Your hazy vision catches sight of your clothing again. When did they change you? Were you hallucinating again? You silently eat your bread, not having the energy to argue anymore. Some sustenance was nice after everything that happened. It’s when the glass of water touches your lips you're met with a familiar chalky taste that makes you realise maybe you aren't hallucinating after all. But you don't get much time to dwell on it before sleep takes you.
-26/11/2023 12:00pm
For the first time in what feels like forever you see sunlight streaming through the curtains in the room. Your head felt too heavy and too light at the same time. Like you're fighting to keep your head up right but also felt like it was about to float away. Your head loses its battle as you stop trying to sit up. It was too much effort to try to move anymore and you needed to pee again…great…
You hear hushed sounds coming from outside the door just as you're about to call out for help. You try to make out words but your head's disoriented and your bladder is demanding your attention.
“There wa…search party se-…-ey found her jacket…unwanted attention….we need tae lea-…” you don't understand what they're saying but you try listening again but it's just a jumble of accents.
“...…the news rep-.... proclaimed drown-....no body fou-...-ght she's a spy…”, Spy? They thought you were a spy? Why would they think that?
“...we're taking her with us…”, your mind jolts when you hear those words. ‘We're taking her with us’…They were never going to let you go were they? Fear seeps into every fiber of your being. The fact you were drugged and unable to move was even worse. What were they going to do with you? Murder you? Torture you? Sell you off?
A sob leaves your mouth before you can stop it and the hushed voices come to abrupt stop. You hold your breath trying to keep yourself from crying, not wanting them to become suspicious of you. Soap is the first to walk in his eyes scanning the room before his eyes land on your weakened state. His eyes soften ever so slightly but he seemed on edge.
“What's wrong pretty girl…what do ye need?”, your mind races to come up with an excuse so it doesn't seem like you were crying because you heard them.
“B-bathroom”, you whisper through your tears. That seems to release the tension in his shoulders as he come to pick you up to take you to the toilet. When you pass the other men they give you gentle smiles as Soap helps you with your business. They make themselves scarce giving you some privacy. You didn't trust their gentle smiles. You knew what you heard, you weren't going to gaslight yourself into thinking these men had your best interest at heart. You needed to leave!
You watch as Soap cleans you, his arms were covered in claw marks more than likely your doing. He had a tendency to get too handy when ‘helping’. He seemed to be learning though since he cleans you quickly this time around. You still weren't happy about all the touching and cuddling you feel at night though. But at least you're knocked out for the majority of it. You didn't know how you were going to escape, you barely had any energy to support yourself. Just standing for a few minutes took all your energy out of you. Soap carries you back gently. You needed to get food in you if you planned on running away. It was best if you acted like nothing had changed. Like you were expecting them to drop you off home soon. Just until you figure out how you'd escape their clutches that is. You catch Soap arms just as he's about to leave after tucking you in.
“Food?”
“Awe bunny are ye hungry?”, you just give him a nod with pouty lips, hoping to gather some sympathy from him.
“Lunch isn't ready yet. Ah’ll get ye something tae munch on ok?” You give him a gentle smile as he leaves. You'll have to use your charm to get him to take you out for some fresh air tomorrow. It's the only chance at escape you'll get. God why did it have to be you? All you ever wanted was to work in the city. Was that so bad? Maybe if you were a better daughter things wouldn't have ended this way. Maybe if you didn't run out on your parents you wouldn't have gotten lost in the forest. Maybe if you had married that pastor you wouldn't be in this situation. But now wasn't the time to think God had forsaken you…You needed all the help you could get.
-29/11/2023 09:00am
“Bunny please eat something…you haven't touched your food since we brought you home…”, You weren't going to either, you were tired of getting drugged. God knows what they do to you when you're passed out.
“Luv come now…he even made your favourite breakfast…everything we do is because we care for you..”, Price chimes on his way to install bolted locks to some of the doors.
“I understand yer mad hen but we just wanna take care of ye…ye'll get used tae living here.. promise”, you give Soap a particularly nasty look as he follows Price to do some renovations. They were in a hurry since they had to leave soon.
You glare at Gaz like he's the source of all your misfortune. Like he's the reason everything has gone wrong in your life. You can't believe you ever found this man sweet or charming. You're tucked into the furthest corner of the sofa you could find with a cushion clutched to your chest for protection. It was one of those nice expensive ones too. God you hated these deranged rich bastards. Everything in this home felt like it was high quality. You wanted to kick yourself because all you could think about was all the nice pictures you could take…if you had your camera that is. It was the first nice camera you bought. You had worked so hard to save up for only for it to be drowned like your hopes and dreams.
You didn't like the fact the place was so warm and homey. For some deranged kidnappers you were expecting someplace easier to hate, somewhere that didn't have so much love and character put into the design aspect of the home.
When you had first woken up you found yourself in a very large bed surrounded by them in what you later found out to be Price's room. You hadn't realised they were in that kind of relationship. You didn't understand what they wanted from you. They reassured you they knew you weren't a spy and that they definitely weren't going murder or hurt you for information. Why did they take you then?
They all had large rooms with large beds to accommodate them all. All uniquely decorated to fit everyone's vastly different aesthetic. They tried convincing you to sleep in one of their beds last night but you insisted on the sofa. You all slept in the living room last night with some on the sofas and others on a large mattress on the floor. You can't believe they bothered to carry that huge thing just so they could sleep near you. You'd find it endearing if you weren't literally trying to escape your kidnappers.
They tried claiming the guest room needed to be renovated. That they'd make a comfortable space here for you. That they'd decorate however you like once they get back home from their new mission. Had they gone insane? What made them think you were upset about a damn room rather than the fact they had KIDNAPPED you. What made them think you'd be ok being kept against your will?
You had tried asking if it was because you found out their secret. You begged and promised that you wouldn't tell a living soul but they just chuckled saying they fell in love with you and just wanted to take care of you. They really were insane…You're stuck with a bunch of lunatics. You wished you had realised that sooner. Maybe you'd be safe at home by now or possibly packing for your move to London. God why you…
You wish they would just leave so you could try to escape or call for help. It wasn't going to be easy. The house was like a fortress. Heavily equipped with cameras and an advanced locking system. But you just needed to bide your time. You weren't going let someone else dictate your life anymore. You worked too hard to get here. You were sick of being a pushover. You're sure your parents would have declared you a missing person by now. Yeah everything will work out, you'll be home in no time. You'll figure out a way to get home. You continue to ignore Gaz as you watch the men with keen eyes while they carry tools and such to ‘your’ room. They must think you're an idiot if they believe they'll get the chance to lock you in that room without a fight…
Copyright © by ethereal-night-fairy. 2024. All Rights Reserved. Writing not permitted for reposting, transcription, translation or use with AI technologies.
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thelov3lybookworm · 8 months
Text
I Didn't Ask For This (part seven)
Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6
Summary: Marriage had always been something sacred to little Y/n, something dream like, where her husband would come and whisk her away to a fairyland. At least, that's what she had always thought.
All her dreams would be shattered.
But maybe she can salvage them?
•○●⛦●○•
Tw: forced marriage, none more that I can think of, so let me know if I need to add anything.
A/n: Thanks to all the anons who gave me ideas for this! I love you all soo much. Also, the dress is not too scandalous (because girlie would have a heart attack if it were) but enough to make him drool😉
And, also, this one is mostly Nesta and reader's friendship and fluff, but there will be an angsty part soon where babygirl slaps babyboi so bear with me.
Edit: Okay yall, the thing I wrote above? It was before I started writing, and now, let me tell you, there is some angst and sadness too, near the end. I was actually planning for the parts from now on to be mostly fluffy, but this new story line is pretty good too, and filled with angst 😌 and who doesn't love some angst?
•○🌑○•
Y/n sat calmly on Nesta's bed, sipping tea as Nesta threw her clothes out from her wardrobe, searching for something she deemed suitable for the dinner date Y/n was going on with Azriel.
Y/n was going to wear one of her everyday dresses, but when Nesta was told about the dinner, she started panicking as if Y/n was going to a war.
When Y/n said as much, Nesta had flicked her hair back and said, 'there is not much difference between the two. You always take part in it to win.'
And of course, no one could argue with Nesta, so here they were.
Finally, after what seemed like eternity, Nesta came and plopped down next to Y/n, sighing. Y/n set aside her empty tea cup before turning to her.
"And? Did you find something that suited your preferences?" Nesta shook her head sadly before she sat up, excited once more.
"I can ask Mor for something."
"Nesta–"
Y/n didn't have a chance to speak before Nesta was running out of the room. Y/n shook her head and leaned back against the headboard, thinking of what would happen at the dinner.
Soon, Nesta had come back with a black fitted dress. It would have been okay if not for the thin straps that were holding it up and the neckline that concealed nothing.
"You want me to wear that? No. Not happening."
"Come on! It's a beautiful dress! Just for tonight. I won't force you to wear anything again."
Y/n contemplated for a moment before shrugging and taking the dress. When she had changed into it, Nesta forced her to sit in front of the vanity and started doing her hair. It was so elaborate that with every passing moment, Y/n's fear of whether she'd be able to undo it herself increased.
Only time would tell.
•○🌑○•
"Okay, so let's go over this again. If he tries to do something you don't like, what will you do?" Nesta stood next to Y/n, ticking things off on her fingers. She'd been at it long enough that Y/n wondered if she should just go to sleep and cancel the dinner with her husband.
"Nesta! We've been doing this for the past couple of hours! I get what you're trying to say!" When Nesta just stared at her, Y/n sighed. "I tell him I don't like it?"
"No! See, you say you understand what I'm saying, then get all the wrong answers!"
"Then what is the correct answer?"
"You kick him between the legs and run away–"
"Nesta, no–"
"Nesta yes. That's what you will do. Understand?" When Y/n nodded exasperatedly, Nesta continued. "Let's go over this again because you don't pay attention to me. Okay, so–"
Footsteps sounded and Azriel appeared. And, even though Y/n wasn't really excited or interested in going out with him, she still sent out a prayer of thanks to the Nother. Because the longer he took to come, the longer Nesta would go on and on about the subtle art of kicking males.
He suddenly stopped short, his eyes surveying Y/n from head to toe. His lips parted as he slowly looked up into her eyes. His pupils were blown wide, his neck and face flushed. He held a bouquet of flowers in his slack hand. He was wearing a finely tailored suit, which fit him in all the perfect ways, showing off his powerful and beautiful body.
Nesta suddenly snapped her fingers, effectively bringing out the couple from the daze they had been in.
Y/n looked away, blushing, as Azriel cleared his throat. He extended the bouquet to his wife, his face becoming redder as she took it. "For y–" He began, but Nesta cut him off.
"She knows it's for her, obviously."
Azriel blinked, taken aback, before nodding. "I think it'd be best if you–"
"You want me to keep that in your room? I doubt you'd be able to do much with those flowers in your hand." Nesta cut in again, not bothering to hide her glee. Y/n nodded slowly, her eyes jumping between the two in front of her as Nesta took the flowers from her. Azriel stared at a spot behind Y/n, his jaw hard.
"I think we should get–" As he began, Nesta spoke up again, to no ones surprise.
"It's getting late. You should leave–"
"Nesta." Azriel said in a dangerously soft voice, a muscle ticking in his jaw. "Don't you have something to do other than talk about kicking a male and interrupting people when they talk?"
Nesta stared at him, indifferent, her eyebrows raised. Y/n looked away, hiding her small smile behind her hand as she pretended to facepalm.
Finally, after the battle Azriel was engaged in ended–thank the cauldron– he stepped forward and held out his hands. Behind him, Y/n saw Nesta wink at her with a mischievous grin. Y/n smiled back, shaking her head an she took Azriel's hand and he pulled her closer.
They took off into the night air, his hands clutching her tight. The flight to the place he had decided was quiet.
As soon as they landed, he offered her his arm, which she eyed suspiciously before turning away. She could practically feel his embarrassment, self consciousness and awkwardness as he lowered the arm and led her to a table in the back.
From the looks of it, this place was expensive. From the numerous chandeliers and the seating to the cutlery and the finest details on the walls and the designs and the architecture, everything screamed expensive.
He pulled out a seat for her, but she walked to the other one and sat herself down. His face was red a he sat down opposite her. As they ordered their food, Azriel asked the waiter to not use peas as Y/n wasn't really fond of peas.
Y/n's eyes were slightly wide as she regarded Azriel. How did he know? When she said as much, he smiled and explained, "I remember you used to complain about how much you despised peas."
"My preferences could have changed." She pointed out.
His smile faltered. "I'm so sorry, I just assumed–"
"It's okay." She cut him off. "I still don't like them."
The dinner was mostly silent despite Azriel's continuous efforts. Whenever he said something, she just hummed or nodded. When he asked her something, she gave short one word answers.
She didn't want to talk to him, and even though she had agreed to have dinner with him, there had been no promises about talking to him. So she stayed quiet, focusing on the food and occasionally finding him staring at her outfit, his lips parted or him biting them. When he realised he was caught, he would return to his food, his face redder than before.
And, despite her initial resentment of the dress she was wearing, she didn't regret wearing it, if it meant she would get to see this flustered side of him.
Soon, they were done and leaving the restraunt when he spoke up.
"Would you like to take a walk and explore Velaris?" From the look in his eyes, he expected her to say yes. And she would've if she didn't hate him. But she did, and so she wanted to spend minimal time with him.
"No. I would like to go home."
"Oh– okay." He looked away for a moment before picking her up and leaping onto the air. While the ride to the restraunt has been comfortable, the ride back was anything but. It was so tense that a blunt knife could have cut through it.
When they landed on the balcony, she turned to walk away. The tension finally exploded. Or Azriel did. Same thing.
He caught her wrist and tugged her to him, her back against his front as his arm wrapped around her, just below her chest.
"What's the matter with you?" He murmured in her ear, his hot breath washing over her face.
"I don't know what you're talking about." She grunted, trying to get free.
"Is it Nesta? Did she tell you to ignore me?"
"Obviously not. Why would she–"
"Then why? Why have you been so cold towards me? Can't you see I'm trying to make this work? You're making it difficult to–"
"I'm just doing what we agreed to. You wanted to have dinner with me, I did. There was no mention of talking to you."
Finally, she managed to free herself from his suddenly slack hold, and when she turned to him, her chest heaving, she found him gaping at her.
"Are you serious?" He whispered, emotions swirling in his beautiful eyes.
Y/n looked away, knowing she was hurting him. But she couldn't help it. She couldn't hand her heart over so easily, knowing if she did, he would have the power over her, and she couldn't let anyone have that power, not so soon after having her first taste of freedom.
He started laughing, her head whipping to him. He took a step back, then another, turning as silver lined his eyes. He leaned on his palms that rested on the railings, shaking his head, grinning like a maniac. He was quiet for a few moments.
"If you don't want to give me a chance, then just say so. I'll leave you alone. Don't need to pretend–"
"I wasn't–"
"Don't. Fucking don't. I get it. You don't want to be with me. You don't even want to try. Just say the words and I'll leave you alone. Don't need to toy with my heart."
"And what of my heart, Azriel? What if you break my heart?"
"I won't! Why do you think everyone, I, have an obsession with breaking your heart? Why–"
"Because you have done it before Azriel! And I don't think I could handle another heartbreak–"
He whipped around, stepping into her, making her crane her head back to look at him. His head was bent to look at her, their noses nearly touching. "I apologised for that already! And I'm trying to right the wrongs! What else do I need to do to gain your trust? Will hurting me help? You know what? Here." He pulled out the only dagger that he had on him and wrapped her hand around the hilt. She tried to pull away, her eyes wide and her heart beating loudly. But his hold was firm as he put the dagger to his chest, his eyes blazing.
"Stab me. Hurt me. Kill me if that's what it takes for you to–" He didn't finish the sentence, his chest heaving. "Do it." She shook her head, her eyes prickling. He huffed and turned away again, leaning on the railing. "Leave, Y/n. And don't worry, I won't bother you again."
Y/n's chest caved at the emotion in his voice, which shook and broke on the last part. She didn't mean to hurt him, and she knew she should clarify why she couldn't trust him.
Her hand rose, shaking.
But just before she could place it on his tense shoulder, she stopped. Would it help? If she told him the reason, would it mend the wounds she had unknowingly inflicted? She didn't think it would.
So she curled her hand into a fist and let it drop back to her side, stepping back and turning away. She needed some time alone, both of them did. She'd talk to him tomorrow.
And as she walked away, she let the tears slip from her eyes.
But she didn't know that behind her, her husband also let the tears flow, his heart aching.
•○🌑○•
Taglist: @bubybubsters @maxxieluvs @bubbbllee @buckyandgeraltsupremacy @waytoomanyteenagefeels @tell-me-a-poem @the-lake-is-calling @spaxxxi @japanese-wonderland-blog @valeridarkness @moonlwghts @deadratio @esposadomd @harrystylesfan2686 @missusbarnes-rogers @whatthefuckshappeningrn @hyacinthoideshispanica @historygeekqueen @lizziesfirstwife @nastynesta @aroseinvelaris @nightless @cleverzonkwombatsludge @kodokunarisu-blog @selillusion @eos-princess @moonfawnx @a-court-of-milkandhoney @emilyo-218 @wannabewolf @ailyr92 @chronically-online-cheese @myheartfollower @hells-sluttiest-new-arrival @marina468 @menaosama @starryhiraeth @hereticdance @mali22 @valencia-rou @azrielsstarlight @marvelouslovely-barnes @luvmoo @starlight-hope @a-frog-with-a-laptop @fall-myriad @alt-ghost @elleofdragons @ruleroftides @5moremin @stargirl1714
Part 8
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itstheghostofmypast · 1 month
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☆22.59☆
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(College AU) Choi San x (f)Reader
Summary: Of course, they loved each other. He was obsessed with her. She, with him to some extent, but to recognise each other outside the four walls of their comfort was a 'no-no'. Perhaps because as much as they loved each other, who knew being academic rivals would be so problematic.
Genre: Hurt + Comfort
Rating: nc-17
Warnings: None
Word Count: 2.9K
Est. Read Time: 13 min
Networks: @cromernet @k-labels
Banner: @cafekitsune
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"I'm so glad we're done with exams." He sighed, sitting down and rolling his shoudlers, before rubbing his neck and eying the food, then deciding to order another round.
"Mhmm... I was so glad to close all the tabs today. My laptop practically thanked me." Smiling, she leaned forward on her elbows, "Is this why we're having an expensive meal?"
Her words held no real malice, but an air of unease, she never liked how he'd casually spend like this, especially on her, she had done nothing to deserve this, and the constant reminder of how he'd always pay whenever it was pricey would nip at her self pride.
He paused to look at her before pouting, "No, I just wanted to treat my girl." Mumbling he moved the tray towards her, gesturing for her to start first, trying to ignore her lingering gaze, the eerie nostalgia setting in, he knew what she'd get like during exam season, extremely cynical and skeptical, to be honest he was no different- but they were finally free and perhaps he just wanted to enjoy a nice meal with her, no hidden intentions or ulterior motives, nothing to think about but each other.
"Then let's go dutch-"
"Not a chance." His abrupt words cut her off, for a split second his tone reverted back to the one she was used to, the tone he'd use back in the day, to snub her or out do her while answering, this tone was often accompanied by a scoff, the only gesture that would mildly indicate that this was but a fun little game, though she knew when the tone was all that would surface, he'd be serious, in no mood for negotiation. Fortunately,  he had barely ever used it with her, often in times of forcing her to do something good for herself, like to rest or to eat, but she'd seen him use the same tone with a few people, who were once her friends, he didn't know she was there, standing behind the wall, listening to him call out her so called friends, people who'd just use her for her work, leeching off her academics, knowing she'd be too tired to even argue or say no, or even too guilty when one of them would bring up how smart she was and that made her arrogant- she heard him that day, the crisp morning air wasn't as cold as his words,
"Your incompetence is a curse you should bear on your own. Don't drag others down in that pitiful hole of yours, especially her."
That day she had lost an entire circle of friends, at a point she wondered if it was even worth it, wondered why he even said that when a class ago he had called her 'a silly little girl' for arguing about what a Freudian slip was when she was clearly wrong, now here he was defending her honour? On the same day he had come to her, sitting next to her in the library and slipping her a coupon, initially she had thought he was insulting her- a typical bourgeoisie move, only to realise it was a coupon for a couple's meal, noticing him side eying her to read her expressions. She had turned to him, pointing at the coupon, herself and then him, and as wordlessly as she had spoken, he too nodded, pointing at himself, her and then the coupon. Something had begun to blossom between the two that day, a relationship both were too afraid to talk about, perhaps because of their on going rivalry since the beginning of their academic year, or the way they'd ignore each other until one would bother the other, or perhaps the fear of being questioned by the lingering gazes around the hallways,  the whispers the wind carried around the campus- wanting not to be part of the gust of wind, choosing to keep whatever this was hidden, a secret shared by just the two.
"I mean...I'd prefer you don't, I wanted to treat you," his argument coming out softer, as he nodded to the waiter who had entered the private section after knocking, to place another tray in front of them, "Just us and a nice meal...I haven't spent enough time with you....that's why." Clearing his throat , he avoided the way she studied him, eyes scanning each feature, every gesture, every breath he'd take, to be able to study his next more, to prepare herself. Truth be told he hated it when she'd do that, this was the first thing that irked him about her, and although he had always been gentle natured, this trait of hers would always have his ulterior ego surface, ready to claw her. It took him some time to realise that was just the face she'd make while thinking, not only at him but everyone, including her exam sheet. That did not mean that being together made it any easy for him, in fact, now he'd feel small when she'd look at him like that, he'd feel as if his sincerity was being questioned, it made him dislike himself, was he not clear enough? Was the choice of words not point to point? Maybe his tone was ooff-
"Oh...well you're right, I guess I am to blame for that, I kind of mentally blocked you out." Mumbling sheepishly she reached across the table to hold his hand, her the tips of her fingers caressing the back of his hand, noting how he visibly relaxed, "In my defense there's this annoying guy in class who thinks he's so smart-"
"Thinks?" With a scoff he laced their fingers together, leaning closer to the table to eye her, his frown morphing into his signature dimpled smile at the sound of her laughter, before he continued, adding onto the playful banter, "Last time I checked this guy beat you in the Moral Philosophy 101 quiz and assignment."
Shrugging in response she grabbed the chopsticks with her free hand, "Beginners luck. Also consequentialism sucks, you're just a utilitarian at heart, that's why you got lucky." With that verdict she began eating, earning a cackle in return, the atmosphere around them calming down once more, allowing her to relax, much to his pleasure. He had begged her to go out with him last week too, claiming that they were left with just one exam so they could relax a bit, though she had threatened to block him if he kept pestering her, which is why he had stopped spam texting her.
However, finally tonight, now that they were free he had earned the right to become her Sannie again, to roll around on her bed, messing with the sheets while she would be scrolling on her phone trying to ignore how his antics were toppling off her plushies to the floor. He'd be able to whine and complain when she'd wake him up early because the 'cafeteria is serving Yaki Udon',
"Go, they let you sneak some to your dorm, sneak some here"
"It's...6 am...let's just eat something else."
"If I had the rich boy privellage,  I'd go myself, but alas-"
"Are you really guilt tripping me for being rich?"
"No, my sweet nepo-baby I'm stating a mere fact."
"A nepo-baby would be a business major like his father, not a communication major-"
"And that's why you're my favourite boy, Sannie."
That day he got her four bowls of udon, even sneaking in the dessert Wooyoung had gotten for himself, and when asked he told Wooyoung he had eaten it, never mentioning her.
That was another issue, he had to keep his relationship a secret from his friends too, initially it was fun, the thrill and excitement would have him shivering with glee, but recently, after most of his friends now had a significant other whom they would publicly walk around with or show affection to, he had begun to wonder if she'd ever want that with him. Or were they just college sweethearts, soon to be forgotten, a bitter sweet memory plastered at the back of their minds, one to return to when times would get rough.
"What's wrong?"
Her question cutting off his thought process only for him to realise how he had just been staring at his food, while she was half way done. Clearing his throat he gave her a gentle smile, shaking his head before reaching for the soda, pouring both of them a glass. Maybe some other time, he'd ask her some other time, right now he could see how she was enjoying herself, he could see how comfortable she was with him, he had no real intentions of ruining the moment.
"Are you sure? You're making the same face you did, when you had to present last semester." Just like that he had lost all the love he had for her, no, he was dating a monster, a demon in the skin of an angel, the human embodiment of Godzilla. Eyes narrowing at her direction he scoffed, leaning back to take off his jacket, before responding with a taunt, "Says the person who forgot the meaning of utility while presenting".
With a gasp she placed her hand on her heart,  staring at him in faux shock, "You fiend, that's because I'm a Kant girlie at heart."
"So...you don't think the ends justify the means?" He asked cautiously, though not of her feelings, but of the risk of his own fragile heart, too afraid to let it slip out of her grasp and shatter.
"The ends, never justify the means, Sannie."  She smiled, staring at him only for it to drop when she noticed him frown at his plate, slowly nodding as he looked up at her, "Yeah...I guess..."
"What's...wrong, something has been bothering you since we came here." She sighed pushing her plate aside, watching him take out his buzzing phone, choosing to stare at the phone rather than him.
"Nothing."
His blunt response nipping at her insecurities, what did she do? Should she not have said that? Did she offend him? Was he going to leave her now? They were in their final year anyway, the time spent together was supposed to come to an end and as much as she wanted to cling onto the false hope of him somehow spending the rest of his life together with her, she knew that was but a wish, reality was far too bitter, far too grim, leaving the two to wonder when they'd become a distant memory.
"Okay."
There it was, his eyes flickered up to scan her face, that defeated look she'd hold when she'd give up, why would she never fight for him? Why didn't she pester him to finish his statement, why didn't she cling onto him, pulling him closer even though he knew he'd run to her at any given moment, he was only waiting for the signal, waiting for her to say the word. Maybe Wooyoung was right, this was just a fun arrangement for the two, a temporary one, which is why Hongjoong had asked him to confront her, but he didn't want to, yet, here he was by choosing to not confront her he had somehow made it worse.
Visibly flinching under his glare she averted her gaze, clearing her throat, playing with her fingers as she stared at her lap aimlessly, so what now?
"What about us?" His words a gentle whisper as he put his phone on the table beside his plate, hunching forward to get a better look at her face, "Does our end justify our means?"
Her head snapped up in his direction, the burning sensation of the flood of tears at the brink of falling, she could feel the fat droplets clinging to her lower lashes, chewing on her lower lip as she tried to compose herself, "Which end...Sannie, the one where we say goodbye?"
His frown only deepened at her question, taking in her shaking form, pinching himself as he tried ro remain rooted to his spot. Seonghwa had told him to listen to her, to comfort and console her because women need time to process and cope, especially someone like her, but then Hongjoong's persistent 'What if she really is with you for the ride',  kept bothering him, what if he were right, but at the back of his mind, this little voice was yelling at him, telling him how that was not true, how he'd seen her take care of him, how he'd felt her love for him; from when she'd slip in her extra notes in his bag for him to study to when she'd slip in a few packets of mint oreo in his bag as a treat. He knew they were more than just a fling, or at least he would like to believe that.
"Do you ... want us to?" His words as soft as the first time he had confessed to her, making her feel even more nauseous than before, though with a gulp she held it back before shaking her head and mumbling a, "No...do you?"
Shaking his head, much like her he sighed before staring aimlessly at her, "Then...why won't you fight for me?" This was less of a question, but more of a whine, a plea, one that had her finally snap.
Her sniff having him focus on her, watching her bring up her hands to cover her face, as she hunched over, making sure he couldn't see her cry, a trait that bothered him, he'd barely ever see her breakdown, even during the stressful exam season, she'd lock herself in the washroom and let it out, while he'd either wait outside the washroom (if he was lucky enough for her to let him into her dormroom) or like most exam seasons he'd be at his own dorm, trying to call her or text her.
"Why can't our end be happy?" He mumbled, finally choosing to get up and  walk around the table and to her, glad he had reserved a closed off private section. Sighing he reached for her, gently gripping her wrists as he pulled her hands off her face, ignoring her whines and protest, "Tell me, why do you think we can't have a happy end?" Pulling her up to wrap his arms around her, letting her fist his shirt, soaking it with her tears, sobbing out a, "Because our means of doing so aren't good."
Pulling her back he stared at her, gripping her shoulders, "What do you mean? Do you not want to keep it a secret anymore?"
"I never wanted to keep it a secret, at least I dont want to anymore." She mumbled trying to hide in his embrace once more but he pulled her back again, much to her disappointment as he tried to read her, "I just thought...your image and...I...maybe you didn't want to tell anyone."
By now he had sat her back down leaning against the table as he looked at her, holding onto her hand, his thumbs caressing the back of her hand, listening to her, raising his eyebrows, "No..." he sighed before gently smiling at her, "I've been dropping hints for a while now. My last hint was what led the guys to pick up on the fact that we are together."
So his friends knew?
"Do they think I'm weird?" She whispered, trying to pull away her hand but he held onto her tighter, shaking his head and letting out a laugh, "If anything they thought I tricked you into dating me...Wooyoung didn't even believe me until he saw our pictures." He smiled at her, the memory of his friends accusing him for lying, making it even funnier, "Yeosang said he could tell you're into dumb guys."
"Well, you are dumb. There's no doubt about that." She mumbled, standing up and moving closer, so she was standing between his legs. Cupping his face, she smiled when he glared at her. The eerie sensation that was once slithering in her veins long gone, "I don't remember a single hint, though."
"How?" He whined, pouting at her, leaning into her touch, closing his eyes as he basked in the attention,  the same attention he knew he would recieve publically from now on, there would be nothing holding them back, not her toxic friends, those who stared or whispered, in fact his friends would just support them, perhaps she needed such a support system too, would be good for her, "Yesterday after the exam I called you out, I said see you tomorrow babe."
"Thought that was a Freudian slip."
"Oh, so now you know what a Freudian slip is?" His eyes snapped open, brows furrowing at her smug expression, hissing when she squeezed his cheeks together, only to pull back when he wrapped his arms around her, squeezing her tight until she was wheezing out apologies. Giving him a proper hug once he eased down on her, she sighed, pressing her forehead against his,"I really do like you, Sannie."
"I like you too." He smiled, feeling her brush her lips against his, whispering against her lips, only his next statement had him feeling her stiffen and possibly struggle against him but he held her tight, not wanting to be smacked, "They updated the marksheet, I scored higher than you in Moral Philosophy....again...sorry babe." Followed by his boisterous laughter and her whining to let him go, greatly ruining the moment.
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A/N: I had to get this out of my system okay- my exams just finished. The next update ya'll will see will be of Meow Chapter 4
Taglist: @edenesth @yessa-vie @marsvillee @spooo00oky @the-kpop-simp @mlysalt
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sopebubbles · 10 months
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Nine
Master list
Synopsis: in a world where alphas, betas, and omegas live along side modern humans as second class citizens, you've fallen through the cracks of a society that wants to take everything wonderful from you. Luckily a timely encounter with the boys just might save your life.
Chapter summary: encounters with people from your past challenge your future with the pack.
Warnings: people generally being assholes, mentions of blood, car accident
WC: 8.2k
A/N: when i came home and said i wanted to write, beastie said "make it hurt" so lets blame this on her.
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It's been three weeks since the pack left for the new house, leaving Yoongi and Jimin behind to fix some minor repairs on the old house and wait for you. Just this morning, Yoongi had finished patching up a hole in the drywall where Namjoon had once tripped and pushed his hand through just with his own strength. But there was still no sight or scent of you.
Yoongi had just finished making a sandwich when the front door opened and Jin walked in. 
"Aren't you supposed to be at work?" Yoongi grumbled before biting into his lunch.
"I came to see you," Jin replied, almost convincingly casual.
"Why?" The younger man asked with a full mouth.
Jin sighed, he genuinely wanted to be pleasant. This wasn't the first time he had come to the house and wanted to patch things up with Yoongi, but the man wasn't making it easy with his cold behavior. Still, Jin decided it would be best to be upfront so he could have a real conversation with him. "We got an offer on the house this morning."
Yoongi paused mid bite before he continued and chewed without responding.
"I wanted to run it by you," Jin continued.
Yoongi snorted. "What does it have to do with me? It's your house, yours and Hoseok's. The one your parents bought you. I've never been anything but a guest here."
"That's not true, Yoongi. You know it's not. You're an important part of our lives. I know I was selfish, but please give me a chance to show you how sorry I am and how much I love you," Jin begged. "I'll do anything."
Yoongi turned his head away, unable to look Jin in the eyes. "The only thing I want right now isn't something you can give me," he admitted. He wished that he could think of anything other than you, but even patching things up with Jin wasn't something that he could focus on for very long.
"You still haven't seen her?" Jin asked softly. Yoongi shook his head.
"Looks like she really doesn't need me to be her alpha. Hoseok was right."
Jin took a step closer, wishing he could get close enough to comfort his packmate. He'd still think of Yoongi that way no matter what. "I'm certain Hobi didn't mean that. And she doesn't seem to know what she needs, to be honest. She'd be incredibly lucky to have you as an alpha, Yoongi." 
He couldn't respond, too choked up on his own emotions. He knew that Jin was right, because he knew he'd be the best alpha possible to you, but right now he was just a mess. 
"One of the ways my mom has used to get inside my head is telling me that you want to take the pack alpha position from me," Jin admitted. 
Yoongi looked at him with surprised eyes and lifted brows. "When have I ever made you think I wanted to do that?"
Jin shrugged. "You kinda have pack alpha energy. Even my mom noticed it the few times she met you. And ever since we met you've always argued with me. Honestly, since you came to us I've always been a little insecure about it."
Yoongi laughed quietly. "To be completely honest, when I first met you guys I thought maybe I could take the leader position from you. But as soon as I got to know you, I didn't feel like I needed to."
"What changed your mind?"
"The way that you treated Tae after the incident. You were so gentle and caring with him. You never made him feel bad for what happened or shamed him. You just took care of him. And then I knew you would take care of all of us, so that's when I remember falling for you."
Jin frowned. "I'm sorry I didn't live up to that version of myself."
"You can probably do it again," Yoongi shrugged.
"I promise, I'm really trying." A moment of silence passed between them but the air felt a little lighter. "Will you and Jimin come home, please? It won't be right for any of us until you guys are there. We all miss you both."
Yoongi nodded sadly, "I guess I can't wait for her forever."
"Hobi has been putting together a room for her," Jin told him, but it only seemed to make Yoongi's heart stink further. "You will find her, Yoon."
"How?" Yoongi breathed.
"I don't know. There's this old thing that people used to talk about, called fated mates. No one really believes in them anymore. But the idea is, some people are meant to come into your life, and I don't think you would feel like this for no reason."
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If you're wondering why you haven't gone to Yoongi yet, it's because things were actually going quite well for you, at least by comparison. One company on Jimin's list stood out to you immediately. The cleaning service was owned by an omega named Ana, and you learned that she was particularly passionate about helping other omegas who escaped abusive situations like she had. She knew working gave you the ability to be independent, but that it wasn't easy to keep up. She took one look at you and knew you were exactly the kind of girl who needed her help. Jimin's name only sealed the deal, though she didn't bother to call him up. When she said someone was needed to clean at the public library, you jumped at the chance to work somewhere you already knew. 
It had been three weeks now, and everything was going well, by your standards. You were still staying at the shelter, but you'd already gotten your first paycheck and in a month or two you might be able to get yourself out of there. For the first time in several months, you felt like things might be okay.
It was almost the end of your shift when you saw them. They were standing in the aisle you were about to turn down to dust, but you pulled back as soon as their scents hit you and hid yourself behind the end of the row of shelves. Sure, those scents could belong to anyone. Everyone's scent was unique, but lots of people shared general scents. You were hardly the only apple scented omega in the world. But the combination of chestnut and pine was too familiar. It had layered the pack's house and mingled in a uniquely homey way. You were certain that it was Seokjin and one of his other alphas. You'd never gotten his name. You'd never even spoken to him or looked at him directly. For good reason, too. He was absolutely massive, standing at least a foot over you. One look at his hands and you knew that he could kill you if you upset him. Seokjin was tall and broad as well, and Taehyung was not much smaller at all, but for some reason it was the unnamed one that terrified you most. The two of them together were downright terrifying, and your brain did a good job of reminding you of that every time your inner voice started longing for Yoongi or Jimin or Hoseok.
You decided to turn back the way you came before they could smell you, too. You could hide in your custodian's closet for the next twenty minutes of your shift. It was Saturday and the library would be closed tomorrow. A little dust could wait until Monday morning.
You emerged from the closet at the end of your shift, having changed out of your cleaning uniform and into jeans and Yoongi's hoodie. It didn't smell like him anymore, but you were reminded of his scent every time you used the citrus scented cleaner for the floors. It was a mockery of his natural smell, but it brought him to mind nonetheless. Few scents have been imprinted into your brain as deeply as that one. There was a card in the front pocket of the hoodie, just a small rectangle with a name and contact information printed on it and Jimin's neat, careful numbers written on the back. The cardstock had lost its stiffness after the hours you've spent clutching it, the corners were tearing from all the worrying of your fingernails, like they were doing now.
Go catch them, she whispered in your head as you watched two tall, broad sets of shoulders walk through the doors of the library.
You know what Seokjin will do to you. 
You don't know. Yoongi wouldn't let him.
Round and round they went again, never giving you a moment's peace. 
Please call Jimin.
You walked toward the information desk where Maria sat at her computer, next to the phone.
"All done for today, Y/N?" Maria asked with a pleasant smile. You nodded.
"Can I use your phone to make a call? Mine was stolen. It's local."
"Yeah, of course. Just dial nine to call out," she said as she turned the telephone toward you.
This is a bad idea.
You picked up the receiver and pulled out the card from your pocket. You dialed nine, then five, and then you froze. A scent filled your nose, one that you hadn't smelled in many years. One you thought you'd never smell again. It was spearmint stronger than any gum or mouthwash. His scent was always so potent, you were amazed your sap parents couldn't smell it. How could they have thought he was one of them? You turned to look for him, but he saw you first.
"Y/N?"
"Eli?" You asked, astonished. You couldn't have expected to see him in this city. 
"What are you doing here?" He wondered, stepping close to you. For a moment you thought he might try to hug you, but you were never like that with your adopted brother. You hadn't seen him since you were thrown out of your parents house, and you always figured it was best that way. 
The years between his presentation and yours had been tense. You could smell him as soon as his scent started to develop. It was the first sign you had that you wouldn't turn out sap like they said you might—truthfully, your average sapiens don't understand the genetics of cross-breeding that well. And of course he was terrified of you giving away his secret, no matter how vehemently you vowed that you wouldn't. You only ever hoped you could be as lucky as him. To be a beta and to go undetected for as long as possible. But it didn't work out like that for you, and all these years you might have resented him a bit for that. 
"I work here," you confessed, looking around as people went about their business in the library. Maria looked to be paying you no mind. "I just finished. What brings you here?" 
"Just returning some books. Are you free?"
You finally placed the receiver back in its cradle and removed your hand. "Yeah, what did you have in mind?"
"Are you hungry?" Eli asked. You were and you weren't. On the one hand you hadn't eaten yet that day, but on the other, your stomach was twisted in its usual knots. You nodded anyway.
Eli took you to a diner close by and promised he was paying so you could order anything you wanted. You ordered a cheese burger to try to pack in as many calories as you could in one meal. 
"Do you still talk to them?" You asked quietly after you'd run out of small talk. Eli held your gaze for a moment before he answered.
"Sometimes," he admitted. "It's not like they were ever big talkers. But they know I'm here and about my job, my fiance."
"Fiance?"
"Yeah. We're planning to get married next year." You nodded thoughtfully. "She's sap, and she doesn't know about me," he admitted, unprovoked. You looked him deeply in the eyes before you spoke. You couldn't help feeling jealous of what that must be like, to be able to deny yourself so easily.
"How is that going?" 
"Pretty well. It's not a problem," he said, but it didn't seem to ring true on his face.
"What about you? You work at the library?"
"I clean there. I just started this month." You shifted uneasily in your chair, a little because you were uncomfortably full but also because he had been talking about himself most of the time and how he was turning the attention on you, and that never felt like a good thing.
"Oh, nice. Your pack lets you work?" 
His question caught you off guard because for one thing, you were surprised that he assumed you had a pack. For someone who was denying who they were to their most intimate partner, he sure did jump to the conclusion that you wouldn't be. But you didn't appreciate the fact that he thought you needed permission to work. For some reason you couldn't really understand, you said, "yeah."
"That's interesting. You don't meet a lot of omegas out there working in public. Seems like most alphas like to keep them locked up at home."
You wanted to tell him he had no idea what he was talking about. As far as you could tell, Eli has less experience with Lykos culture than you did. What did he know about alpha and omega dynamics? But you didn't bother. "Well, my alpha isn't like that."
Eli brushed off his hands as he finished his fries. "That's good. Let me take you home. I'd like to meet them."
You didn't know the address of the pack's house, but you remembered how to get there from the library, and you were able to direct him there without much trouble. 
"It's that blue one up there," you told him when he turned onto the right street.
"This one?" Eli asked with a raised eyebrow, seeing what you did at the same time: a for sale sign with a triumphant red 'SOLD' sign sitting atop it. You swallowed thickly and felt your eyes begin to burn.
See, all these weeks of torturing yourself with indecision, and they didn't want you anyway. You never listen to me.
You could feel Eli's eyes on you, waiting for an explanation, so you cleared your throat. "I don't actually live here. I stayed here for a little bit, with a pack, but I guess they've moved on."
"Your pack left you?" He asked incredulously.
You shook your head, "they aren't actually my pack. They just took care of me for a few days when I was sick. It was a while ago. I just didn't want to tell you where I'm really staying, so I lied."
"What were you gonna do if they were here and I asked to meet them?" Eli smirked and you shrugged.
"Hope they'd play along until you left."
"And then what?"
And then ask if I could stay.
Idiot.
"I don't know," you admitted. You had no idea what you were going to do if you saw them. You didn't know what you would have said if you'd called Jimin and he'd answered earlier.
"You still haven't learned to think ahead, have you, Y/N?" Eli sighs and puts the car back in drive. "So, where are you staying?" 
You sit up straighter in your seat and reach for the door. "It's fine. You can leave me here. I've wasted enough of your time tonight."
"Don't worry about it. Just tell me where to go."
You directed Eli downtown to the shelter, only for him to have the reaction you had feared. You moved quickly to get out of his car but his hand on your arm stopped you.
"Y/N, why are you staying here?" His voice was filled with shock.
"I'm just going through a little rough patch. I'll be back on my feet soon. I have a job. I just need time," you rushed out all your defenses.
"Do you need money?" 
"No! God, I don't want your money."
"Y/N, you can't stay here. I've heard awful things about this place."
"Well, it's better than the street, or some predator."
"You can do better than this."
"I'm trying, okay! You think I like this? I don't. But what's it to you anyway! We meet randomly after five years and you're suddenly an over protective big brother? Do you think my life has been easy?" You've started to shake and you knew you were getting hysterical, but you didn't need his opinion on things he would never understand.
"Y/N, I know things haven't been easy for you. Let me help," he offered softly.
"How can you possibly help me?" You sat in the passenger seat with your arms crossed, looking every bit his teenage sister.
Eli swallowed before he spoke. "Come stay at my place for a bit."
"At your place?" He nodded. "What about your fiance? Doesn't she hate Lykos?"
"I never said she hated them."
"Us."
"Us. She just had some bad experiences with some alphas when she was younger. She doesn't really like to be around our kind," he explained, as if that made it better.
"Doesn't it make you feel crazy to have to pretend all the time?"
Eli shrugged. "I'm used to it…with our parents. They still don't know about me. It's not that hard, really. You can pretend for a little bit. You can get heat suppressants or whatever."
You know he's right.
You leaned your head back against the headrest and closed your eyes.
I don't want to pretend anymore.
What's so great about being the real you?
I'm gonna call–
If you were going to call him you would have by now and besides, they literally gave you a sign. It was all a lie. Just go with Eli. 
You sighed. "I have some stuff inside. If I leave it, they'll throw it out."
"I'll wait," Eli said and let you get out of the car. 
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Yoongi and Jimin arrived at the new house just as Hoseok was finishing dinner preparations. Taehyung had set the table for seven, and for the first time in weeks it felt complete. No one would hold it against Yoongi for needing space, or for doing what he needed to do in hopes of bringing you into their pack, but that didn't mean they hadn't missed him and Jimin like crazy.
And it wasn't as though they hadn't seen each other at all. Taehyung had driven Hoseok back to the old house on many occasions, to bring his boys food or to take their laundry, no matter how many times Yoongi insisted they could go to the laundromat. He couldn't bear the thought of it. Jungkook stopped by after work anytime he didn't have a night shift. Namjoon and Jin had come over a few evenings when Yoongi was working so that Jimin wouldn't feel lonely.
It was strange for Jimin to spend time alone. He'd spent most of his adolescence surrounded by others and then the last four years in a pack house where someone was always home. In fact, the point in his life when he was the most alone was right before he met Yoongi and the others, and moving in with them had been a huge relief. Jimin hadn't been exactly lonely during those weeks when it was just him and Yoongi, but the quiet was hard to get used to, and the noise that surrounded their return was welcomed and familiar.
No one was going to admit it, because they were too happy to be back together again, but the time apart hadn't been the worst thing in the world. It had given them space to work on bonds that they had not paid as much attention to as maybe they should have. Seokjin and Namjoon had gone on several dates, just the two of them, the pack leader letting his mate take him to every museum in town and casual trips to the library. Jin hadn't even realized how much he was neglecting the second alpha in his pack, nor how much he had truly missed quality time with him. As soon as the realization hit him, he made a heartfelt apology to Namjoon for focusing too much attention on Hoseok and their plans. Of course, Namjoon forgave him easily. He always would.
Namjoon couldn't really put it into words, but his alpha status had never sat quite right with him until he met Seokjin. Sure, he was large and strong and everything an alpha should be on the outside, but he'd never felt the stereotypical aggression or need for control that alphas were known for. This had always felt like a character flaw in himself until he met Jin, who simultaneously had shown him that being an alpha didn't mean he had to be an asshole, and who was also willing to take on the burden of control that Namjoon rejected. When he met Jin, he could just be himself, and for that he would always love him above all others.
Hoseok, too, had used his time wisely in getting more in touch with the feelings of his younger packmates. The fact that he hadn't realized how insecure Taehyung had been feeling and how often Jungkook had been sleeping outside of the nest ate at him constantly. Although he and Tae had been companions at home for years now, Hoseok made a concerted effort to spend more quality time with him, to ask him his opinions on every detail of the new house, not only so he would feel included and welcome or because of his artistic eye but because of the boxy grin Tae gave him every time gave him immeasurable happiness.
Jungkook got the lion's share of Hoseok's attention whenever he got home from work, whether it was 5 pm or 5 am. It always involved lots of touching and scent marking, although if Jungkook came home smelling like lavender and oranges, Hoseok spent considerable more focus on getting those smells onto his own body. If he had a hard time getting Jungkook to smile and laugh once he was in the nest, Hoseok would gently coax him into talking so he could comfort the beta. 
On the whole, everyone in the new house was feeling much better than they had a month or even months ago, except for the fact that two integral parts of their lives were missing. It didn't feel the same as it did before they met Yoongi and Jimin. They had been irreversibly changed. And those two hadn't quite seemed to benefit as much from the separation as the rest.
Jimin squealed and giggled as Jungkook lifted him off the ground and spun him around. "Put me down, Kookie!"
"Never," the other beta mumbled into his shoulder. "I missed you too much."
"I saw you two days ago," Jimin reminded him.
"That's two days too long."
Yoongi couldn't help smiling at the betas as they greeted each other. It warmed his heart to see how little changed between them as Jungkook began to scent mark Jimin until he smelled like something fresh out of the dryer.
"I'm glad you're back," Hoseok said as he cupped Yoongi's smiling cheek in his hand. His heart ached when he watched the man's smile diminish.
"Yeah, I missed you guys," Yoongi admitted, but somehow the omega could tell that longing for his pack wasn't the dominant feeling in his heart at that moment.
"Let's eat dinner, and then I'll show you around the rest of the house," Hoseok encouraged and Yoongi nodded, setting down his bag before going to the table.
"You made kimchi-jjigae?" Jimin asked before taking a seat.
"I wanted to do something special, so I made your favorite to welcome you home," hoseok shrugged.
Jimin walked over and put his arms around the omega in a tight hug. "I love you, hyung."
"I love you, too, Jiminie," he smiled into the man's soft hair. Yoongi watched with a smile of his own. Nothing was as nice as watching Jimin get doted on the way he deserved, and he felt a pang of guilt for having kept the man to himself for so long. Yoongi had heaped tons of love and attention on him during their time alone, but Jimin always deserved more. He was sure he'd feel the same way about you if– Yoongi cut off his own thoughts. He wasn't going to go there anymore. He needed to give up for the sake of his pack, and he knew it. It wouldn't be easy, but he had to. He couldn't let himself believe in anything as fickle as fate to bring you to him.
After they'd all eaten until they were stuffed, Hoseok led Yoongi upstairs by the hand. 
"That's the master bedroom," he pointed out as they passed it by. "This is the room we hope will be the nursery," he said walking by the middle room on the second floor. Yoongi gave his hand a reassuring squeeze. "And this room is for your little pup."
Yoongi swallowed thickly as he walked into the room. The walls had been painted a serene shade of sea foam green and the mattress was fitted with cream colored bedding.
"I didn't think she was a pink kind of girl. Or at least I wasn't sure, so Taehyung suggested this color might be soothing for her. What do you think?"
 "You guys worked so hard on this." Yoongi ran his fingers down the gauzy cream curtains. "It's great, Hobi, but," Yoongi sighed as he sat on the edge of the bed. "She's not coming."
Hoseok frowned and settled himself atop Yoongi's lap. The alpha wrapped his arms around his waist naturally to hold him in place as he had so many times. "She hasn't come yet. But that doesn't mean she won't. I know you're feeling hopeless, but you need to have a little faith."
Yoongi looked up at him with weary eyes. "How can you be so positive about it?"
"I might be a tad bit more objective about it than you are," Hoseok smiled as he leaned into him. 
"Every minute feels like an eternity," Yoongi whispered.
"I really think she might be your fated mate," Hoseok giggled.
"Do you actually believe in that stuff?"
The omega shrugged. "I don't know. I don't think I've ever met any, but as you know, I don't get out much. I only know stories. Do you have a better explanation for it?"
Yoongi thought quietly for a moment, opening and closing his mouth as he searched for the right words, but he thought maybe they didn't exist. "All I know is it feels wrong to know that she's out there…in the world…and I'm not there to protect her."
Hoseok gently knocked their heads together. "Sounds like fated mates to me." Yoongi rolled his eyes playfully. "Don't give up yet, Yoon. Jimin and Jungkook found her by chance, but that doesn't mean it wasn't meant to be. When the time comes, you'll be in the right place at the right time, too."
"I hate the feeling that I won't be there before something terrible happens."
Hoseok clicked his tongue at the man. "You're so paranoid. Lighten up. She's coming! And when she does, this room will be her home. Won't that be nice?"
Yoongi smiled, giving into Hobi's relentless optimism. "It will be perfect."
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Eli drove you to a stylish looking apartment building on the other side of town. It was obvious the moment he took you inside the apartment that he hadn't used the time while you were gathering your things to warn his fiance that you were coming. A tall blonde came quickly toward the door wearing an expression you couldn't quite define but leaned towards angry.
"Babe, where were you? I just got home and you weren't here. What's going on?" She asked as her eyes fell on you and even you could feel yourself shrink under her sharp eyes.
Eli leaned in to kiss her cheek. "I'm sorry, baby. I should have called. But I ran into my sister. You remember, I told you about Y/N." 
"Not really," she admitted with a tight smile as your brother stepped aside and she got a good look at you. "I thought she ran away," she whispered.
"Yeah, ran away, not died," he whispered back. You weren't sure if they knew you could hear them or they didn't care but you felt smaller and smaller by the second. "She lives in the city now, and she needs a place to stay," he said loud enough for you to hear, although she clearly wished he wouldn't.
"Can I talk to you for a minute, Eli?" She asked with the same tight smile, and it occurred to you that you didn't know her name. Had you forgotten it, or had he simply not mentioned it to you before at the restaurant?
"We'll be right back, Y/N," Eli nodded.
Whatever room they moved to was not far enough away or sound proof enough to keep their conversation from your ears.
"What the hell? You can't bring random girls to our home, Eli!"
"She's not some random girl. She's my sister. She has a difficult situation right now, am I not supposed to help her?"
"Doesn't that seem a little convenient to you? That your long lost sister suddenly finds you when she's fallen on hard times?"
"What are you even insinuating? I'm the one that ran into her at her work."
"I just think it's fishy. And you never talk about her. I think you've mentioned her twice the whole time we've been together, so what's with the big brother act?"
"I just feel bad, okay? Our parents weren't easy on her. I just want to help her out for once."
A long pause settled between them.
"Please. Just a couple weeks, three tops, until I can find her a place to live."
"Did she ask you for money?"
"No. She didn't even ask if she could stay here. But her other situation wasn't safe."
"Jesus. Are you sure she's even your sister? Hasn't it been like ten years? She still looks like a teenager."
"She's just small. It's her, trust me. Everything will be fine."
"Fine. But three weeks and not a day more, Eli."
You turned toward the door to leave. You didn't want to be an inconvenience, much less cause strife in their relationship. He'd already lied to her about you enough, saying that you ran away instead of telling her how and why you were thrown out of your home. Every moment you spent there would only heap more lies up between them. You didn't know what he was thinking of bringing you here, but he was misguided.
"Y/N," he spoke just as you reached for the door knob. "Everything is fine. Come, I'll show you the guest room."
There was always something that made your skin itch about a 'guest room.' Maybe it was just that you never needed it spelled out for you that you held a place of impermanence no matter where you went. You didn't belong. You wouldn't be staying long. These were things you knew without needing them codified in words. 
"There are fresh sheets in this closet," she told you, making a reappearance with a somewhat more believable smile on her face. "I would have made it up for you if I had some warning."
"That's fine. I can make it myself," you assured her quietly. "I'm sorry, I forgot your name."
She sighed quietly. "I'm Kate. There are extra blankets in there as well in case you get cold."
"Thanks, Kate," you murmured before she turned to leave.
"Get some rest, Y/N. We'll talk in the morning," Eli said before he closed the bedroom door and you were alone.
The following day, Kate seemed to find reasons to be out of the house all day. You did your best to have as little contact with Eli as possible. I'm spite of his recent charity in bringing you here, you had never really been that close. The years between you and the resentment you felt were high barriers. Besides, you'd become too suspicious of kindness in your life to truly trust him. 
During the week, you returned to work, and even though he offered to drive you and pick you up, you insisted on taking the bus across town, if for no other reason than that it extended the time you were out of their home. When you were there, you cooked and cleaned. It was the only way you knew how to do penance for your ever inconvenient existence, the only payment of a perpetually uninvited guest. And when she realized how quiet and clean you were, Kate did thaw toward you, if only slightly. 
The main benefit of staying at their apartment was the opportunity to get quality sleep. It was quiet, and you were spared the frequent interruptions that occured in the shelter, as well as the constant anxiety of being around so many strangers and strong smells. Among the many practices that made the True Life Ministry different from other shelters was that they didn't separate you by secondary gender, only by male and female, so the threat of alphas was ever present. Although behavior was strictly monitored, you never felt entirely safe.
There was one thought that continued to itch in your brain as you laid on the bed and tried to sleep. It was still pretty early in the evening, but you'd had a pretty rotten day. One of the Lykos who frequently passed her days in the library had decided to make you an object of interest today, whiling away the afternoon throwing trash at you every time you came near where she sat in the computer lab while you emptied the bins or cleaned a table. Eventually, one of the librarians asked the alpha to leave, but it had already soured your mood. You cooked and ate dinner silently before turning in early, and even Kate was a little concerned by the way you kept your head hung low and didn't look at either of them even once. 
Now, the only comfort you could think of was sitting in the closet mere feet from your bed.
The blue and white striped blanket is so soft. At least start there.
You know you're not supposed to do that.
Hoseok said it was good for me and it was so nice when he did it.
You aren't Hoseok. You're barely even a fucking omega. You know it never leads to good things for you.
Please. Just a little nest. I need it. Just for a little while. Please.
You sat up in bed and stared at the closet door. There were several very soft blankets in there going unused. Kate did say you could use them.
She said if you got cold. You're not cold. You're fine.
"What's it going to hurt?" You whispered to yourself.
Do you really have to ask? Remember the first time? 
You pulled back the quilt laying on top of you and scooted off the edge of the bed. Creeping to the door, you opened it slowly.
You don't even know how to build a fucking nest. Don't even try.
It's not that hard. Start with the white one.
Eli told you to pretend. What if they find you acting like an animal?
For once you ignored the harsh whispers in your head and followed the smaller voice's instructions. You laid the soft white blanket out as a base, then bunched up two knitted blankets to make a perimeter. You didn't need a very big nest. You were so small. Finally you fluffed the striped throw blanket across the top before climbing into the nest. For once, all your voices quieted as you wiggled your body around, finding the perfect spot for you that made you feel warm and fuzzy and protected. All the world fell away as you nuzzled your face against the fluffy white blanket beneath you. You might have been falling asleep, or maybe just falling within yourself to a quiet, soft place you can only really remember going to when you were in Hoseok's nest last month. You'd never managed to get there with your former pack, where they mocked you for your pathetic attempts at a nest until you gave up altogether. 
Kate, despite her previous coldness toward you, could tell there was something wrong with you. She could tell you were still awake by the soft, albeit strange noises coming from the guest room, and decided to check on you to see if there was anything you needed. When you didn't answer her knocks, she decided to open the door anyway. It was her home after all, right? When she turned on the light, she didn't expect to see you lift your head from a pile of blankets, hair a static mess and pupils blown wide. You whimpered at the bright light.
"What are you doing?" She asked, her tone a mixture of shock and suspicion. "What's going on? Eli?" She called loudly.
You stared at her in confusion until he came to the doorway. "What?"
Kate pointed a finger at you. "What the hell is she doing?"
Eli cursed under her breath as he walked toward you on the bed. He took your face in his hands. "Wake up, Y/N. Snap out of it!" He muttered. 
"Is she…is she one of them?" She asked, pitched raised. You whimpered again.
"Damn it, Y/N," Eli groaned. "I didn't know."
"What do you mean? Are you one of them too?"
"No. No! She's adopted. You know that. My parents thought that's why she ran away, but I didn't know for sure," Eli lied.
"Fuck, Eli. You know how I feel about those...things," Kate cringed.
"Baby, please. I'm sure she's harmless." Eli approached her with open palms, but she only backed out of the room. 
"Get her the fuck out of my house. Right now!" She shouted. 
Eli looked between the two of you anxiously. He stepped closer to you once again and felt his heart clench at the desperately scared look in your wide, vulnerable eyes. "I'm sorry, Y/N, but you have to go."
You whined and pressed yourself closer to the blankets, as if they would protect you. Eli sighed. You weren't difficult to pick up and pluck out of your nest. You'd lost whole pounds since your last heat.
"I'm sorry Yn," he muttered as he carried you down the hallway toward the door.
"Make sure she's out of the building," Kate grumbled as he went by her holding the door open.
Eli nodded and carried you into the elevator before he set you on unsteady feet. "You couldn't fucking hold it together could you?"
Your brain was scrambling to come back online, but you didn't have words yet. Fucking stupid omega brain.
"I swear to God if you ruined this for me," he muttered. You wished you could tell him what I fucking fake he was, but your tongue was glued to the top of your mouth. The elevator reached the lobby and Eli walked you outside. "Sorry, Y/N," he told you once more before he turned to go back inside. "Have a nice life."
The night air was chilly with that feeling it might rain at any second. You thanked yourself for wearing Yoongi's hoodie to bed and turned to walk in an unknown direction.
We fucking told you so. You never fucking listen.
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Yoongi wasn't the only one who spent his nights on duty feeling like the next call was going to be the one he dreaded most. Rainy nights always filled Jungkook with a specific kind of dread. It was the kind of night that led to avoidable accidents, which is what he thought had happened when he and his partner stopped their patrol car behind a parked car in the middle of a narrow one way street. The short whoop of the police cruiser when they came to a stop got the attention of the driver of the car, who turned and quickly began shouting at Jungkook as soon as he opened the passenger side door.
"It wasn't my fault, officer! She pushed him in front of my car! There wasn't anything I could do!" The woman screamed hysterically.
"Calm down, ma'am," Jungkook's partner, Xavier, said cautiously before he leaned into his walkie talkie and requested back up. 
Meanwhile Jungkook walked around the passenger side of his vehicle and sniffed the air. The falling rain made it harder to smell the scents around him, but he managed to pick up a few things. The sour fear coming from the Sap woman, smoky sage, and blood. When he reached the front of the car, he could tell those last two scents came from the alpha lying unconscious in the road, blood flowing from his head to mix with the engine oil and rain water on the sleek blacktop. He knelt down when he got closer and spoke into his own radio to call for an ambulance. And then he smelled it. The apple cider vinegar that telegraphed your fear. 
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No matter what Jin and Hoseok said, Yoongi wouldn't attribute the foreboding and acute anxiety he felt tonight to the possibility of fated mates. He felt nervous every night he sat in the ambulance waiting for the next call, hoping it wouldn't be your body that was injured. Tonight was rainy and dark and that always meant car accidents. Yoongi was just anticipating what anyone in his line of work would do on a night like tonight.  
"Do you think it will be her this time?" His coworker asked with casual cruelty as Yoongi drove to the scene of an accident. 
"Shut up," he muttered in reply.
"Don't be so sensitive. I thought alphas like you would be able to take a joke," the Sap teased.
"It's not a fucking joke." Yoongi barely held back a growl.
"Relax. You're not the first EMT to spend the night driving around looking for someone they love in every scene. We all go through it at some point. It's never them.*
But that was where he was wrong.
Yoongi freely admitted that he'd been a paranoid mess the last month, scanning every face at every site for you. But he had never imagined your smell, so he knew he wasn't imagining it now. It filled his senses the moment he opened the door of the ambulance. He could smell the blood, too, but he honed in on your scent only. He could focus on nothing else.
You were sitting on the curb between the bumpers of two parked cars with your head between your knees, but Yoongi didn't need to see your face to know it was you. Only you could be so small and fragile, even under the shock blanket Jungkook had the good sense to put over you. He wanted to scoop you up and get you out of the rain. The fact that Jungkook was standing protectively in front of you lessened his panic by a fraction.
"Is she hurt?" Yoongi asked, kneeling in front of you. "Y/N, are you okay?" 
You didn't respond, simply continued to rock back and forth with your hands clasped over your head. 
"She's not injured. She's just in shock. She hasn't said much," Jungkook told him.
Yoongi reached forward to touch your chin. "Look at me, princess. Let me see if you're okay."
When you lifted your eyes to his, you looked as terrified as you smelled. "Alpha? Is he dead?" You asked painfully.
"Yoongi, over here!" His partner called from the road. The alpha didn't take his eyes off you. How could he leave you like this? "Yoongi!"
"Go on, hyung. Do your job. I'll take care of her. I won't let her out of my sight. I promise."
Yoongi's eyes remained locked on yours for a moment longer. You had asked him only one thing, and if getting you reassurance was all he could do then that's what he would do. "I'll go check on him. Everything will be okay, princess. Wait here." He tried his best to sound reassuring as he stroked your wet hair and you leaned into his touch before he tore himself away to go help the alpha bleeding out on the asphalt. 
His sage scent faded as life drained from him, but the other EMT was applying pressure to his head wound, so he wasn't gone yet. Yoongi went into autopilot to help his partner stabilize the patient, but he was desperate to know what had happened and how you had been involved. Should he even be saving this man? Who was he to you? 
They managed to get the man onto the stretcher and into the ambulance while he still clung to life without Yoongi having much idea at all of what he was doing. He stayed in the back with the patient while his partner drove, otherwise Yoongi would never be able to make himself leave without you.
"Y/N, I'm taking you to the police station," Jungkook told you after the ambulance had left and another police officer had taken the driver of the car away. 
Without any other acknowledgement, you stood, letting the shock blanket fall from your shoulders as you turned your back on Jungkook and placed your hands behind your back.
Jungkook frowned, "you're not under arrest, Y/N. I'm just taking you to the station to give a statement and wait for someone to come get you."
You turned to look at him confusedly. "No one will come for me."
Jungkook smiled sadly. "Yoongi will come. Let's go."
At the station, Jungkook sat you next to his desk in the bullpen and went to go get you a warm drink. He placed a paper cup of hot tea in your hands, which you took without looking at it or him, but just stared blankly ahead.
"Y/N, can you tell me what happened before the accident?" Jungkook asked, fingers poised over his keyboard.
"Eli threw me out."
"What?"
"Was walking. Was raining but…nowhere to go." You took a sip of the too hot tea to ease the dryness of your throat. "Smelled him first. Hate that smell. So I walked faster, but he's bigger, faster. He caught me. Grabbed my arm."
"Did he hurt your arm?" Jungkook asked. You honestly didn't know. You felt numb all over, just like you had since you'd smelled the burning sage earlier. Setting down the small cup, you pulled up the sleeve of Yoongi's hoodie to reveal the bruises that were blossoming along your forearm. "Shit," Jungkook muttered. "We'll take pictures in a minute. What happened next?" 
"We argued."
"About what?"
"Wanted me to come with him. Didn't want to."
Jungkook studied your face cautiously. "Why did he want you to come with him?" 
You shrugged. "Same as always. Wanted to breed me."
"Is that Eli?" He questioned.
You shook your head. "Eli is my brother."
Jungkook nodded. "But you know that man."
You nodded dumbly. "My alpha."
Jungkook felt his stomach turn over and over. Knowing what little he did about your experience with your past alpha, your barely-there behavior made more sense.
"What happened when you argued?"
You swallowed. "I tried to get away, to get him off. He wouldn't let go, so I–I pushed him and he slipped. He fell into the street and then the car was there."
"Did you see the car before you pushed him?" Maybe Jungkook shouldn't have asked. He wasn't formally interrogating you. Something in him just wanted to know.
You shook your head. "Its lights weren't on. Dark and wet. Couldn't see behind him."
Jungkook swallowed thickly and turned his attention to his screen to finish entering the information you had given him.
"Did I kill him?" You asked blankly, making Jungkook pause to look at you.
"He was still alive when they left the scene. Even if anyone is at fault, we would first look at the driver of the car. You aren't in any trouble right now, Y/N." You nodded in understanding. "For now, it's probably best if you stay quiet."
You were sure time passed, although you didn't feel it. Jungkook went and came back, took photos of the bruises on your arm and brought you a fresh drink. The world continued to turn because it had never stopped for any of your crises, big or small, why would it now? It might have been hours or minutes. You couldn't tell. Everything around you was blocked out until you felt a cold breeze sweep through the station carrying a sharp citrus scent.
Alpha.
Without any thought, you found yourself on your feet. As if acting on their own, they shuffled past the rows of desks. There was a wall and gate separating the back part of the station from the public entry, but you pushed past them until you could see Yoongi. His black hair dripped rainwater onto his cheeks, and he pushed the wet strands back. You couldn't hear what he was asking the officer at the desk, but the words went silent when he turned toward you. Without an invitation you found yourself pressed against his chest, your arms wrapping around his waist.
It took him half a second to respond, encircling you in his own strong arms and holding you to him. "It's alright," he whispered.
You nuzzled your forehead against his chest and murmured back, "Alpha."
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I hope the end of this roller coaster made up for the journey. I promise it's going to get better now. Thank you for sticking it out. Please tell me what you've liked in this chapter or any time up until now, and what you're looking forward to or hoping for going forward. Here's a Yoongi, you've earned it.
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“Darling” | Tommy Shelby x Reader
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Request: yes by @raincoffeeandfandoms
Pairing: Tommy Shelby x reader
Summary: Tommy and (Y/N) have a lot of explaining to do to the rest of the family when Tommy lets a term of endearment he doesn't normally use slip one night at the Garrison.
Warnings: language, drinking, implication/brief mention of stalker-like behavior
Word Count: 2857
A/N: I really loved this request, Flor! There’s something about Tommy using terms of endearment that just get to me. I hope you like it. Enjoy! :)
Let me know if you want to be tagged in future stories similar to this one!
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(Y/N) (Y/L/N) was the only person Tommy Shelby called "Darling".
What started off as "I'll take my chances by myself, darling," — said in a rather snarky tone — after she'd offered her help one night at the Garrison, had now turned into the main term of endearment he used when addressing her. (Y/N) liked hearing him say it as much as he did...it reminded her of the journey that they'd gone on to get where they were now.
(Y/N) was hired at the Garrison by Harry, who owned the pub before the Shelby family took it over. She was kept on the staff by Arthur, who assumed the 'owner' position, although he didn't do much work behind the scenes. She met Tommy one night when he was having trouble working out what she now knew was a plot to sell the stolen guns that he had in his possession. She offered her help, but was only given "I'll take my chances by myself, darling," as a response, a curt way to get her out of his sight.
But then he started coming to her. It wasn't for things that had to deal with the guns, but rather just business in general. (Y/N) had some ideas on how to run the pub better and Tommy was, surprisingly, all ears. The more times they found each other, the more a different type of feelings developed between them.
The night that everything changed was when Tommy managed to save (Y/N) from two men he saw watching her at the Garrison that evening. He trailed them as they trailed her back to her home and was able to deal with them before they could do what they'd set out to do. (Y/N)'s question of "why did you care so much to follow me and make sure that I was ok?" gave Tommy the opportunity to tell her what he'd been wanting to do for the last several weeks. And unlike he'd been done in the past, he took that opportunity and explained to her how he felt. Thankfully, she felt the same.
And so they started seeing each other. (Y/N) stayed longer on nights Tommy was there so that he could walk her home, and then stay the night at her place. They made time to do things together around Small Heath, but always had to make sure that they'd go unnoticed. It wasn't because they were worried about the town gossip. No...someone would be dumb to spread rumors (that weren't really rumors) about Tommy Shelby and his lady. But instead they were worried about his family, who were the people she oftentimes waited on, finding out.
They both thought that it would be better to keep the other Shelbys out of it. It was all so new, and they were content with where they were at that moment, so why ruin a good thing? That's why Tommy checked in all directions and made sure that they were alone before he called her "darling". Him doing so only made the giddy feeling that coursed through her stronger.
(Y/N) was behind the bar, dealing with some customers one evening. She was pouring out some gin when the door to the pub opened. From a slight glance in that direction, she was able to see Tommy remove his peaked cap and stuff it into the pocket of his jacket. He made his way over to the bar, moving behind it just as (Y/N) was finished pouring a drink.
"We're out of mild, (Y/N), can you go and get some from the stockroom?" Harry asked as he came around the bar from the other side. He then noticed Tommy and sent a nod as a greeting in his direction.
"I can," (Y/N) answered him, setting the bottle she was using back on the shelf before she made her way through the door on the same wall and into the small stockroom. She went about looking for what Harry had asked for, hearing the sound of someone walking into the room seconds later. She already had an idea of who it could be, but a quick look taken just in case confirmed that Tommy had followed her into the room. He glanced behind him to make sure nobody had trailed him before he made his way over to (Y/N).
"When's your shift finished, darling?" he asked her, his voice low.
(Y/N) smiled as she grabbed what Harry needed before she turned to face Tommy. "Shouldn't you know when?" she teasingly asked him, her one eyebrow quirking upward as she posed the question. Tommy pursed his lips and shook his head slightly as a response to her question, making her laugh softly. "I've only got a half hour left," she then provided him with the information he was looking for.
"Good. Come into the snug when you're finished," he told her, nodding his head in the direction of the mentioned room as he spoke. It was (Y/N)'s turn to purse her lips, thinking over the suggestion that he made. Tommy, who always needed to know a person's answer immediately after he posed a question, was beginning to become impatient with each silent second that passed. "Will you?" he asked her, leaning in closer to her as he awaited her response.
A smile formed on (Y/N)'s face as she sensed his urgency to hear her answer. She always loved to make him wait; to see him become impatient, and she made sure to do so at every chance she got. There was something about seeing cracks form in Tommy Shelby's composure that scratched an itch she didn't even know she had.
"I will," she finally answered him, a beaming smile on her face as Tommy chuckled. He knew what she was doing...he'd caught onto her little game rather quickly. But he let her do it for the sake of seeing her smile.
"Good," he gave the same response that he had previously. He then stole a glance behind him, making sure that no one was in the room with them before he leaned in and kissed her lips quickly. "I'll see you in a half hour," he mumbled against her lips, feeling her smile against him.
"You will," she agreed with him, kissing him one last time before she pulled back, "I've got to take this out to Harry before he gets to wondering what we actually came in here to do," she said to him then, holding the jug up between them to assert her point.
"Go on, darling," he obliged to her statement, stepping out of her way then so that she could make her way out of the stockroom and back to the bar. He watched her go, eyeing her body over as she disappeared through the doorway. He waited for a few moments then, making it seem like he actually had a purpose for coming in here. When that time passed, he too exited the stockroom and walked back into the pub's main area. He stole a glance at (Y/N), who was still working the bar, before he made his way to the snug.
Arthur was the only person in there when Tommy entered the side room, but he quickly announced that Polly, John and Esme would be joining the group once they finished their duties back at the shop. Tommy nodded upon hearing this information, and he sat down in his usual chair, accepting the glass that Arthur slid his way once he was sitting.
They got into talking about the business then, and although Tommy would have rathered to leave that conversation rest for a later time, he took part in it. Doing so would pass the time quicker than just sitting in silence, and right now all he wanted was for thirty minutes to go by.
Tommy didn't know why he was anxiously counting down the seconds for (Y/N) to be finished with her shift. It wasn't like he could do anything overtly to her while in a room that was full of his family. But yet as the new hour came around, he found himself trying to suppress the smile that was threatening to appear on his lips. His family would never let him live it down.
About five minutes before her shift was due to be finished, (Y/N) opened the door to the snug. There was cheers exclaimed as a greeting from the packed room, and she sent everyone a smile before going about asking what she intended to: "is there anything I could get anyone before my shift's finished?" she asked no one in particular, looking at each person after she spoke. She tried hard not to let her eyes linger on Tommy, who had been shamelessly looking at her because he was technically allowed to...that was what you did when someone was speaking, right?
"Nah, love, we're good in here," Arthur answered for the rest of the group, "but why don't you come in after you're all finished up? 'S been a while since we've seen you properly," he suggested then, and (Y/N) had to wonder for a moment whether Tommy had told him about the two of them.
"If you all would be fine with me joining then sure, I'll come in," she answered, unable to shake the feeling of Tommy's eyes still on her.
"Of course we'd be fine! Go on and finish your shift so you can get back in here!" John hollered at her, waving her out of the room with his signature grin plastered on his face. (Y/N) shook her head and laughed at his words, saying goodbye to them so that she could go and finish her shift's final minutes behind the bar.
Five minutes later, like she agreed on doing, (Y/N) re-entered the snug. More cheers sounded off as she greeted everyone again. She then clasped her hands together over her waist and looked around, trying to figure out the seating arrangement and how she'd fit into it.
"Care to make some room for her, Pol? Bring another chair into the room?" Tommy spoke up, addressing his aunt, who was sitting on the end of the booth that was furthest away from him.
(Y/N) looked over to the older woman, who was now in the process of standing from the booth. "You don't have to be the one to move, Polly, I can..."
"No need to worry, (Y/N). I was about to get up and get another drink anyway," Polly stopped (Y/N) midway through her sentence, brushing the younger woman's statement off as she stood and moved towards the door.
(Y/N) stayed frozen in her spot though. She then turned to Tommy, her brows furrowed slightly. "Tommy are you sure about me taking Polly's seat, I can just go and..."
"Yes, I'm sure, darling...have a seat," Tommy cut her off this time, his words rolling off of his tongue without a second thought. (Y/N) nodded, not giving much thought to his response either as she went and sat down.
Everyone else in the room stopped what they were doing the second they heard what Tommy said. Sets of eyes were going between the two for a few moments before either of them caught on.
Noticing the sudden shift, Tommy broke the silence, "alright, what? What's happened?" he addressed the room, his eyebrows raised as he looked at each of his family members.
"I believe you should be telling us what's happened, brother," John answered, his gaze still shifting between Tommy and (Y/N).
"What?" Tommy asked again, confusion apparent in the single word statement.
"When have you taken to calling (Y/N) 'darling', Thomas?" Polly asked from where she was standing at the door, her brows raised.
"I don't know what you're talking about," he continued to play it off as if it was nothing, looking over to (Y/N) to see if she was still in his corner. The second he saw her wide eyes, he knew that he was on his own.
"'Yes, I'm sure, darling, have a seat' doesn't ring a bell to you?" Arthur joined in, quoting what Tommy had said just moments ago.
"That's what I said..." Tommy trailed off, not denying that those were the words that left his mouth. He looked between all of the people in the room then before his eyes settled on (Y/N). She immediately began giving him one of those 'will you speak first, or should I?' looks, hoping that he'd choose the first of the two.
Polly was the one to break the silence before either of the two could speak up. "Spill it," she insisted, crossing her arms over her chest as she looked at the guilty couple with pursed lips. She was a spitting image of a principal who was asking a child to own up to something they did; right down to the aura she was exuding.
Tommy held his gaze on (Y/N) for a moment longer before he exhaled a sigh and ran his hand along the back of his neck. "(Y/N) and I are seeing each other," he told the room their secret. He looked over at (Y/N) again to see that she was sitting in a rigid manner as she waited to hear how they'd react. Inside she was panicking, holding her breath and hoping that she wouldn't combust from the anticipation that was building.
"For how long?" Esme questioned from (Y/N)'s right. She took that opportunity to finally look away from Tommy, although his eyes burning into the side of her face reminded her that he was still very much present.
"A few weeks now," she mustered up the ability to answer the question, still waiting in limbo to see how they'd react. These Shelbys were good at withholding their emotions and reactions, and that really wasn't helping her case at the moment.
"A few weeks and you didn't think to tell us?" John chimed in, leaning out past Esme so that he could look at (Y/N) more properly.
(Y/N) opened her mouth to speak before she had a clear answer, so she said nothing, which made her eyes widen slightly. She was crashing hard here. Thankfully Tommy stepped in to cover her as she continued to draw a blank. "We didn't want it to become a big deal. Neither of us felt there was a reason to tell you, so we chose not to," he explained to them, really trying to downplay the importance of it all.
"It's not that we didn't want to tell you guys, it's just that it was...new," (Y/N) added on, making sure to let them know that this choice wasn't made solely because of them.
The room fell silent then after (Y/N) finished speaking. To her, it felt like the air was thick enough with tension that she could cut it with a knife. It made her ring her hands together and stare over at Tommy with a pleading look in her eyes. She hated the anticipation of what would be said next.
"Well in that case..." Arthur started as he stood up from his end of the booth. He didn't say anything as he made his way to the empty area of the room and turned to face the family again. Just finish your sentence already! (Y/N) was screaming at him in her mind, her nerves kicking into overdrive. Time seemed to move slow until a smile spread across the eldest Shelby sibling's face. "Welcome to the family, (Y/N)," he finished his statement, his eyes focused on the woman he was addressing, "next round's on me!" he then announced to the rest of the people in the room.
"Let's fucking celebrate!" John exclaimed, a wide grin spread across his face.
(Y/N) smiled as she looked around at the rest of the Shelby family. She couldn't help but giggle as her eyes focused on Tommy, who was in the middle of getting affectionately slapped on the back by Arthur, who John then followed with the same gesture. Her heart swelled as she saw his smile.
She kept her eyes on him until she felt a set of arms wrap around her. "Welcome to the family, (Y/N)," Esme offered her own kind words as she hugged the woman sitting to her left.
"Thanks, Esme," (Y/N) responded, pulling away to smile at her.
"Wait until Ada finds out," she said with a grin then, "she's going to be thrilled to have another woman in the family." (Y/N) smiled at her statement.
She couldn't deny the giddiness that she felt bubbling up inside of her. This moment had gone the way that she hoped it would, and it would be another that she would remember for a long time...part of the reason being because it was another instance when Tommy called her "darling".
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Other Parts: Part Two, Part Three (short version) Part Three (long version) and Part Four.
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You were the younger sister of Johanna Mason from District 7. You were her only remaining family and were put in the 73rd Hunger Games as punishment for your sister's behaviour after she won her games. They thought killing her only remaining family member would convince her to behave and stop being so reactive. It of course didn't work because you won the Hunger Games.
They'd underestimated both you and your sister. Johanna had suspected they might do something like this so had been quietly training you and teaching you survival skills since she got out. Then when your name was called and she became your mentor, she put every fibre of her being into making you win this. She taught you how to play the game, how to appear pretty, charming and get sponsors. Caesar commented on how unlike Johanna you were. "You're a lot more likeable than your sister" he said plainly and you smiled, pretending you weren't visualising pulling his tongue out through his teeth. You were exactly like your sister and proud of it, you just had to play a different game to her.
When you won and were let out Johanna was right there waiting for you. It was the first and only time you saw your sister cry and the trauma brought you both closer. You managed to form some life for yourself, you became friends with the other tributes and tried to keep your head down but you weren't good at that and neither was Johanna. Then Snow announced his stupid spin on the games and you were reaped...and Johanna volunteered as tribute instead of you.
There was nothing you could do as you watched your sister be submitted for the games again and you were furious. So it was of no surprise that when the rebels contacted you, you jumped at the chance to sign up with them. That's how you found yourself in District 13 at the end of the quarter-quell games. You watched Katniss, Beetee and Finnick come in but not Johanna. She'd been captured and while Katniss was freaking out about Peter you wanted to scream because nobody was bothered about your sister, nobody except Finnick.
He came to you as soon as he was able. "Y/n I'm so sorry" he told you "I went to look for her, I tried to find her I really did, I promise" he told you and you nodded "I believe you Finnick". He was the first person you cried with over your sister.
You found out after that, that Finnick had lost Annie. Apparently, she'd had a breakdown from all the stress and the drugs they gave her were too powerful. She'd overdosed the first night Finnick went into the games according to Heavensbee. You had no idea and hadn't heard anything about it but that was the capitol and you had been distracted with a rebellion. With your mutual loss, Finnick and you bonded. You'd always gotten along but you'd never been close which didn't make too much sense.
As soon as you became a victor Johanna introduced you to her victor friends and you hit it off with Finnick immediately. You were both social butterflies who could charm and flirt with pretty much anyone however after a few parties where the two of you clearly were the centre of attention, you felt him pulling away. You asked Johanna about it but she'd just shrugged and said she didn't know anything. So you'd remained civil but never been that close again, until now but in a completely different way.
You responded to loss a lot differently to Finnick, but then again your sister was alive while his love was dead. You could've argued your sister being alive and tortured daily was worse than being dead but didn't think that would help Finnick. The second he found out about Annie he fell apart. He had to be hospitalised and was a shell of himself. You'd responded to your sisters's loss by throwing yourself into work but everyone grieves differently.
You heard sobbing as you passed the medic bay and knew immediately who it was. You unlocked Finnick's door and he turned away before he saw it was you. He wiped his face and sat up. "It's okay" you told him "you don't have to stop". Finnick looked at you and shook his head "any news?". "No but that's not why I'm here, I'm not great at comforting people but I'm here for you Finnick. My sister would want me to look out for you". Finnick paused and then smiled. It was a sad smile but it was a smile. "It's funny" he said "because she said if anything happened to her, I had to look out for you". You smiled sitting down on a chair at the end of his bed "well funny how things change huh? Now, when was the last time you showered, ate or went for a walk?". Finnick shrugged "I don't remember for all 3". You nodded "well that's where we'll start".
And that's what you did for the first week. You visited Finnick for every meal between shifts. You took him for walks around the corridors and made him shower. You stood outside with a towel and clean clothes for him. You figured if he started acting more human it would make him feel like one again and it slowly worked. His appetite increased, he dragged his feet less, he cried less. There were still down days, one day you walked in to find doctors with him and heard he'd cut himself having nightmares so you spent the next few nights asleep at his bedside, ready to hold him down if he tried to hurt himself. Your life revolved around making him get better and you weren't even sure why, neither was Finnick.
"Why are you being so kind to me?" he asked one day when you revealed the sugar cubes you'd snuck into the kitchen and stolen for him. You passed him the cubes and looked at him "because we're friends and you'd do the same for me". He nodded "I would have but you aren't the most touchy-feely sentimental victor". You smiled, pleased Finnick was feeling well enough to poke fun at you. "That's true but I have a soft side to me, Johanna and I both do". Finnick shot you a look "see you I can believe but Johanna?" and you laughed.
It was nice to feel happy and you felt a sharp jolt of it, before remembering where your sister was. It suddenly hit you she was somewhere being tortured as you spoke. Finnick saw the look on your face and didn't have to ask what you were thinking. He gently took your hand. "It'll be okay" he told you "we'll get her back". You nodded and squeezed his hand "I thought I was supposed to be the one comforting you?" you said. Finnick shrugged "we're friends remember?" and for some reason that made you smile like a goofball.
Once Finnick was discharged from the hospital he began taking an active role in District 13 and you helped him settle in. He was moved to a room just across from your own for stability and even though you didn't work together, you sat together in the cafeteria and spent most evenings together. One of the main perks of being an ex-victor/murderer was you got special training with fun toys courtesy of Beetee. You were down there every free minute you had but you felt like Finnick wasn't using this to his full advantage.
"Can you give me tips on how to throw?" you asked Finnick one day after work. He blinked and looked up at you "as I recall, you have a pretty good arm on you already" and you smiled remembering the time you accidentally hit him in the face thinking he was Joanna. It was at a Capitol party, one you'd actually enjoyed and the memory was a good one. "Yeah short range but not long-range, I want to know how to throw a spear or maybe a trident. Know anyone who can teach me". Finnick did not look in the mood but you gave him your best smile and he couldn't resist. "Fine" he pouted getting onto his feet stroppily "but not for long, I'm shattered". You grinned "yay thanks Finnick!" and gave his arm a squeeze before pulling him down to the toystore of weapons.
You saw Finnick's eyes twinkle as he saw the trident Beedee had made for him and smiled. Finnick swirled it effortlessly around himself looking very hot as he did it and he knew it. He turned to you, his shoulders lifted and confidence risen "so, let's get started".
Finnick had you throw a few spears first and after observing he began to adjust your posture and angle. You got better with the spear but couldn't seem to get the trident anywhere near the target. "You've got good power which is no surprise" Finnick smiled "but this isn't an axe, it's bigger and heavier. That's why your aim needs to be better for the trident to find its mark". You nodded before a thought occurred to you "have you ever thought you could be pitch Pitchfork Boy instead of Trident Boy? I mean a trident and pitchfork are basically the same thing". "What? No they not! They're completely different!" Finnick said utterly flabbergasted by your claim and taken-aback by your sudden declaration. "But they are!" you argued continuing the fight "long stick, 3 spiky bits at the top!".
Your bickering escalated and your arguments became sillier until finally, Finnick couldn't stop laughing. You weren't sure if it was because of how strange your argument was, he actually found you that funny or a semi breakdown but either way, it was the most you'd heard Finnick laugh since this all happened. He had tears streaming down his face and he was laughing so hard he had to sit down. You sunk down beside him also laughing and when you both caught your breath he smiled at you. "Thanks Y/n". You looked at him "for what? Being so hilarious?" and he smiled again. "For reminding me there are still things to live for like having a laugh with you". There was a lot of weight in those words and you could tell Finnick had really been contemplating if there was anything worth living for. You should've suspected it but you hadn't and you were suddenly so thankful Finnick was still here. So much so you did something you never did...you hugged him!
Finnick was also surprised and tensed as you pressed up against him and wrapped your arms around him. "Thank you for staying here with me Finnick, I'm glad you're still here" you said into his neck and then Finnick relaxed and hugged you back. "Me too" he agreed.
Time settled and you stayed in the embrace before pulling back feeling slightly flushed. You were searching for something to say when Finnick spoke "I'm glad you got me to come down here and train, can we do it more often?". You nodded "as often as you want".
Finnick started smiling more after that and he was beginning to get back to his charming jokey self. Katniss commented on it one day when you and Finnick teased her for daring to change her hair up. Finnick smiled when she said how much better he was doing. "Well it's thanks to Y/n, she's the one who nursed me back to health and dragged me out of bed each day". You shrugged "nursed is a strong word but I did drag him around a lot". "Well good work" Katniss said "I'll tell Prim you might try out for nurse too yeah?". You showed her a finger and the 3 of you laughed. It was nice to hear your 2 friends laugh together.
Finnick kept you to your promise of training as often as he wanted and you tended to go every other evening after work. It was a stress relief in many ways but you also just enjoyed hanging out with Finnick. He was skilled and you learned a lot from him, as well as helping him master a few skills yourself. It felt productive, fun and you loved that you had something in your control. It was honestly the highlight of your week and Finnick agreed.
You'd had a really good training session so for the last part you got a little cocky. You were sparring with Finnick and decided to use the trident. You'd gotten a lot better at using it but still Finnick smirked as you picked it up "really?" he asked "baby you really want to use my weapon against me?". You felt a little fluttery when he called you baby but didn't let it show. You stood up taller and twirled it in one hand, the exact way you'd seen Finnick do "I certainly do pretty boy". The grin Finnick had on his face was delicious, so much so it was all you could think of for the first few seconds of your sparring match.
Finally your brain came back to you and you nearly knocked Finnick over with the staff of your trident but at the last second, he caught it. You knew the second his hand connected with it, it was gone and sure enough, he ripped it away from you. Finnick did it with so much momentum you stumbled into him and couldn't help but smile at how impressive he looked when he did that. Finnick grabbed your arms to stop you from falling and noticed the look on your face "why are you smiling I won?". "Did you?" you asked honestly thinking the situation you were in was pretty victorious. Finnick Odair standing over you, his hands firmly on your body while he stared at you with his brooding smoulder. Finnick chuckled as he got your point "I guess we're both winners then" he replied and let you go softly. "So that's a draw right?" you asked and just like that the two of you were back to bickering playfully.
After you talked at him until Finnick agreed it was a draw you headed to the showers for a quick wash before bed. You were only allowed a shower once a week so this was another reason you were both in such high spirits. "The way you hit the target without even looking was so cool!" you told Finnick as you entered the co-ed bathroom. Finnick shrugged "well I try, I've lost a lot of muscle mass over the past few weeks". "Well it looked pretty good to me" you smiled hanging your clothes and towel up. You pulled the shower curtain around you and got undressed. Finnick did the same in the cubicle next to you. You enjoyed your 5 minutes of warm water and totally forgot you'd not brought your towel into the cubicle with you. You peeked out of the curtain and sure enough, it was hanging across the room. You sighed, shut the water off and walked across to grab it.
It was late so there was nobody around and you had the towel in your hand and were about to wrap it around yourself when Finnick opened his curtain and saw everything. His eyes quickly took in your body before he looked away and you turned around. "Dammit Finnick" you commented and worked on getting the towel around you. You looked up and realised you were now in front of the mirrors and Finnick was staring at you through them. When he saw you'd spotted him he turned his back and you chuckled. You tied the towel and turned to him "if you wanted a look Odair all you had to do was ask" you smiled at him. Finnick's usual swagger had gone so you let it drop to not make it awkward.
You both dried off and gathered your stuff. You made conversation about how nice it was to be clean and Finnick gave you one-word answers. You said goodnight and stepped into your room. Your first thought was, it wasn't a big deal. You were friends and friends saw each other naked all the time! But then you thought about the way Finnick had been looking at you and there was no way of denying he was turned on. He liked your body and was attracted to you. You'd thought the two of you had chemistry back when you first met him but knew with Annie nothing would ever happen. However she wasn't here, it was just the two of you and Finnick could do whatever he wanted and judging from his eyes when he saw you naked, that was you. You debated your next move, should you just let it go? Wait for Finnick to approach you? Leave the moment and see if there was something there tomorrow too and build on it? You were never good at waiting so you decided to shoot your shot. You'd always wanted Finnick so why not go for him at the end of the world?
You crossed the corridor in nothing but your towel and knocked on Finnick's door. He opened it and looked at you "Y/n?". "I saw the way you looked at me when you saw me naked and I'm just going to be honest. I think you're hot and I want to sleep with you and I think you want me to. Want to do something about it?".
"Yes" Finnick said pulling you inside way quicker than you expected. He didn't even give it a second thought telling you he'd also been pacing his room thinking about you.
Finnick was just as eager once you were inside. He kissed you the second the door was shut and was so needy it was beautiful. He took control initially but as he got more and more heightened and his hands started pawing at you, you started to tease him. You pushed him down on his bed and held him down with one hand "hmmm is someone impatient?". Finnick made a noise reaching for you but you trapped his other hand with your leg "nope, I want to hear you say it. Tell me what you want honey". Finnick made a gorgeous moan and looked at you dead in the eye "I need you to drop that towel, jump on top of me and make that workout earlier look like child's play". You leaned back and loosened the towel "done" you said and let it fall to the floor before completing Finnick's other steps happily.
***
The next morning Finnick woke up and knew something was different before he opened his eyes. Then he did and he saw you laid next to him. You were facing the other way from him with your back to him and he started to panic. What had he done? Annie hadn't even been dead a year and he'd slept with another woman! He'd betrayed her in a way he knew she wouldn't have done to him. He felt like the worst person alive and then you turned around and he got it.
Finnick saw your face and couldn't help but smile. You looked so calm asleep. Awake you always had some guard up but asleep you looked so peaceful and naive. The lines the games had left on your face were gone and Finnick realised he felt happy just seeing you. You'd become the face he got most excited to see and it was almost instinctive now. He enjoyed seeing you peaceful and happy like this because he liked you. You were also so fucking hot. When he saw you naked yesterday his mind had nearly exploded! Your body was incredible, you had abs and your muscle-to-curve ratio couldn't be more perfect. So when you appeared at his door he realised he acted with sanity and clarity. He hadn't slept with you on a whim, he did it because he liked you and genuinely wanted to. He thought Annie would understand that and so he turned towards you.
He pulled you closer so you were resting against his chest. "Finnick?" you asked sleepily and he nodded rubbing your arm "yeah, don't worry is early. Go back to sleep" and you nodded. "Who knew your abs were so comfy" you sighed nuzzling into him and he chuckled. He kept his arms around you protectively and fell back to sleep.
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So guess who saw The Ballad of the Songbird and Snakes, went home and rewatched all the HG movies and fell in love with Finnick again?
This will be a four-part series and I'll be posting two more parts next week!
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goldengleams · 4 months
Text
cut my hair - l. hughes
In which you and Luke come back to each other after you cut your hair.
Warnings: alcohol, underage drinking, angst, college melodrama Word Count: 4.5k words (let's go!!!)
A/N: Super excited for this one! This is inspired by “cut my hair” by Tate McRae and I would encourage you to listen to it while you read! Hope you enjoy and leave me some requests while you’re at it :))
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Just wanna cut my hair, lose myself, make you sweat
Go out and get messed up, find myself in your bed
Just wanna cut my hair, little black dress, can't forget
Just wanna show you whatever she do, I can do it better
"Yo, Moosey, is that Y/N?"
Luke couldn't help but follow your figure from across the bar. He could always find you in a crowd, no matter the amount of people or the size of the room. His hand dropped from the shoulder of the girl standing next to him, his date for the night.
"Uh, yeah. Yeah, I think so," Luke said to his teammate Mark standing next to him. He suddenly felt hot, pulling on the collar of his shirt to allow himself to breathe a little easier.
"She looks good, man." Mark wasn't wrong, you did look good. Your head was thrown back as you laughed at something your friend said, looking happier than he had seen you since you fought before winter break.
Luke wanted to slap Mark but he knew it would do no good and he would be lying if he said he didn't agree with his comment. It had only been a few weeks since you had stopped talking, but he felt like it had been years.
You looked different, but it was a good different, he thought. Your hair was short now, right at your shoulders, highlighting your collarbone and your chest in the strapless black dress you wore. You were surrounded by a group of your friends. He recognized them as the ones who had picked you up from the house he shared with his teammates that fated night. He remembered how hard you had cried, unable to look at him after you fought about him leaving for New Jersey and the trust issues that clouded your vision. Luke remembered how he was unable to answer when you asked when the last time you had gone out on a date was. He wished he could've shown you how much he cared but he was too afraid to admit that he didn't want to lose you. He couldn't admit that he was just as afraid as you were. And then, before he knew it, you were storming out and you were on a break.
Luke regretted that moment. He couldn't tell you, because he was too nervous to text first, but he wanted to apologize. If he could have stopped himself from ever pushing you away, he would've never ended up standing with someone he didn't know.
Luke and a few of his teammates had been invited to a sorority formal, which is how he ended up in the back of a more formal bar far away from campus with a date he barely knew. Rutger's girlfriend had begged a few of the guys to go with some of her sorority sisters and Luke and Mark agreed, but he wanted nothing more than to be by your side.
"Dude, you're staring" Mark commented. "Maybe you should go talk to her."
"I don't know if she'd even give me the time of day," Luke said. “I fucked up.”
"You'll never know unless you try, Lukey. Besides, you probably just caught her on a bad day. What did you say to her anyways?
"I told her that she was overbearing and that I was going to leave soon anyways,” Luke said, close to Mark’s ear so his date couldn’t hear him.
“Oh,” Mark stammered. “Yeah, that’s bad, Luke.”
“Thanks,” Luke chuckled humorlessly.
“She’ll hear you out, dude. Just tell her how you really feel. Trust me, girls love honesty!" Mark said, already moving away from Luke to follow his date to the dance floor.
Luke sighed, rolling his eyes at Mark's immaturity. He knew he was so focused on his future that he had lost sight of the present-his college teammates, his classes. Most importantly, he had lost you. Maybe this was his chance to get you back.
I've been playing nice little too long, yeah
Drivin' on the high road hit a dead end,
I'd tell you but we just don't talk,
I've been having selfish thoughts
Your friends were so excited to go out and celebrate the first week of second semester. You could tell some of your girlfriends were crushing hard for some of the guys in the bar, but your mind was elsewhere after spotting a certain someone across the room.
For almost all of break, besides the holidays, you had been trying to figure out how to move on from Luke Hughes. You and Luke had clicked immediately, and even though you had tried to take the relationship slow, it was no use. Within two months, you were dating. Luke was proud to see you cheering for him at games and you became a staple at Thursday movie nights at his shared hockey house. You and Luke fit together like pieces of a puzzle.
Which is exactly why you couldn’t figure out why your boyfriend had started sending short messages and declined your affection starting after Thanksgiving break. Luke constantly claimed he had hockey practice or a team bonding event, but it was all proven to be false when you showed up at his doorstep one night to confront him.
Rumors found Luke Hughes like a moths to a flame. Whether it was his future in the NHL or his relationship status, your Michigan social media gossip pages never missed a beat. That week in the fall, Luke was apparently single and talking to a girl from the sorority the hockey team regularly hung out with. You never thought you were the jealous type, but with Luke’s odd behavior and his lack of communication, you thought the worst.
Even now, as you stood in the bar, you got a chill as you thought about the night you confronted him. Luke had the nerve to sit on his bed as you paced in his room, asking him simple questions that he had trouble answering.
He knew that you cared so much about your relationships with others so he used it against you, saying you were bombarding him with messages and he was sick of it. You couldn’t remember every sentence you spoke, but you could remember the hurt you felt when you realized that Luke just didn’t care about you like you cared for him. He had said it himself, he wouldn’t be around much longer, implying that you should both just move on. You didn’t wait for him to deal the final blow, instead, you called for the breakup and left before he could say anything else.
“Earth to Y/N! You want a drink?” Your friend, Caroline, asked. She waved her hand in front of your face to get your attention.
“Uh, I’m good. I didn't expect him to be here and I'm a little overwhelmed,” you replied. You hadn’t locked eyes with Luke, but you were afraid the moment was coming sooner than later since you struggled to tear your gaze from his tall figure.
“How about a shot then? They’ve got those green ones that are really good, and will make you forget that tall idiot who has been staring at you all night,” Caroline tried again.
I've been working hard while you're six drinks in,
Tossin' in the dark, feel you under my skin,
Once I start I just can't stop,
I've been having selfish thoughts
You were about to decline her offer when you saw who Luke was standing next to. You recognized Rutger and Mark easily, but you had only just got a clear view of Riley Jones, a sorority girl standing next to him. You had forgotten that there was a sorority formal the first week back from break, and of course, you had ended up at the same bar.
“No fucking way.” You muttered under your breath, but Caroline was too attentive.
“What?”
“He’s with Riley. He’s at the stupid sorority formal with that girl who’s in our biology class, C.”
Caroline gasped, always perfectly dramatic in every situation. “It's always the sorority girls, I swear!"
You nodded, finally able to turn your head away from Luke’s direction. Sighing, you pulled out your phone to check the time, only 10:23. You had made a deal with your friends that you couldn’t leave until 11, but that deal seemed much easier when your ex wasn’t factored into the equation.
“He shouldn’t even be here, it’s the middle of the season and he can’t drink, anyways,” you grumbled to your group of friends. They were hoping to have a Luke-free night, especially with the start of the new semester, but you all had forgotten the sorority that would be gracing the bar with their presence that Thursday night. Caroline rubbed your arm, assuring you that you weren’t alone in this situation.
“Well, he's definitely an idiot for losing you, but he doesn't seem too interested in his date," Caroline said. "Don't focus on him, the night is still young! And, not that you needed it, but you seriously just had the glow-up of winter break. Luke's missing out.”
"New year, no more being sad over stupid boys!" You lifted up your nearly empty drink to clink it with your other friends' glasses.
Your other friends chimed in and you laughed, Caroline wasn’t wrong. Despite crying over Luke for a few days, you refused to lay in bed and rot just because he had made you feel small. Instead, you opted to take out your anger at the gym over break, so you knew your dress that night fit you better than ever before. You had also decided to do a hair transformation and cut it quite short, a style your friends at college hadn’t ever seen on you. You knew you looked different and you felt confident.
“Why don’t I get us the shots before we hit the dance floor? On me!” You could feel your layer of liquid courage settle over you. Luke was closer to the bar than you were, so it was almost inevitable that he would see you if you got the drinks.
"You know he's over there, right Y/N? Don't look now, but he's staring at you." Your other friend, Lexi, said to you. Of course you knew. Luke was one of the tallest guys in the bar and he easily towered over the other guys that were hovering close to your friend group. Just as you went to look at him, he redirected his gaze to Riley and laughed at something she said. The nerve of him. You rolled your eyes and stood up a little. If he wanted to play hardball, so could you.
"Yeah, I wanna give him a taste of what he's missing."
“Okay, get it girl!"
You sauntered over to the bar, leaning over just enough so that your chest was on display in the new black strapless dress you had bought. It hugged you just right and showed off your assets quite well. The music was pulsing and the lights were pretty dark, so it was a shock when you felt a hand on your back.
There's no right way to say it,
Want you so bad, I hate it
Good girls, so overrated
So overrated...
Luke watched as you pulled out your phone to check the time. Even from across the room, he could see your bright lockscreen light up your face. The glow illuminated your bright smile and your dimples, and suddenly he wished he was right next to you to see it.
"Hey Luke, want to dance?" Riley's voice caught his attention. She was standing right in front of him, staring up at him with her big brown eyes rather excitedly. He hesitated, unsure of what to say, but Riley just kept on going.
"Mark said you liked to dance, so I thought..." Riley continued to ramble but Luke had already tuned her out. He didn't really care that he was caught in Riley's scheme for the night, he just didn't want it to look like he was actually with her.
"Mark's an idiot," he chuckled. "I don't dance."
Riley rolled her eyes, unimpressed at her date who was standing up against the wall. "Can you at least just put your arm around me again? My ex is like, right across the bar and I need to make him at least a little jealous."
Luke didn't mean to ignore Riley's plea, but he had lost you in the crowd. You weren't standing next to your friends anymore. He felt his heart rate pick up at the thought of losing you again. He scanned the room and finally found you leaning over the bar. If he could get Riley to move over a few steps, he could maneuver his way to the bar counter and maybe-
"Are you looking at Y/N?" Riley asked. It wasn't exactly a secret that you and Luke had broken up. All pictures of him had been removed from your social media and Luke hadn't been playing his best hockey by any means. Luke's trance seemed to end abruptly as he cleared his throat to try to come up with an answer, but it was no use. In the time he had been pondering his plan, some guy had sidled up next to you. Luke recognized him, his name was Chris, he was in your major and lived down the hall from you. He always said hi to the two of you when you passed him on the way to your room and Luke couldn't lie, he was pretty fit, too. He let out a shaky breath.
"Uh, no," Luke fumbled. "I was just thinking about getting another soda up at the bar."
"Luke, I know you've been staring at Y/N over there all night even though I'm your date," Riley hummed, seeming only slightly disappointed. "You should go talk to her. Girls are a little scary, but we just want to be loved. Look, I'm gonna go chat with my ex across the bar and show him a fun time, okay? You got this."
Riley walked away from Luke, leaving him standing there a little dumbfounded. Was it really that easy? Chris seemed to make it look easy, standing too close to you at the bar countertop, making you laugh as you waited for whatever you had ordered.
Luke found himself moving closer to the bar without really having a concrete plan in place. Would you ignore him? His runaway thoughts ended when he heard his name called.
Just wanna cut my hair, lose myself, make you sweat
Go out and get messed up, find myself in your bed
Just wanna cut my hair, little black dress, can't forget
Just wanna show you whatever she do, I can do it better
"Luke! Hey man!" Chris called. In his drunken state, he had practically whipped around and made you fall when he caught sight of Luke. When you realized who Chris was calling for, you immediately shook his hand away and turned back to the bartender who was almost about to get to you to take your drink order.
"Chris, don't," you tried to say as quietly as possible. Luke was getting closer to you to try to say hello but you wanted none of it. You ignored Chris and Luke greeting each other and kept your eyes trained in front of you. You refused to give in.
"I gotta get back to the guys, I'll see you later, Y/N? We can watch that new episode once you get back!" Chris called, giving you a side hug as you said goodbye.
"Hey, Y/N," Luke said. His voice sounded soft and timid and you couldn't help but feel your stomach fill with butterflies. This was the closest you and Luke had been since before Christmas and now it was the middle of January.
"You look beautiful, I love your hair," he tried again, finally standing next to you. You hated how tall he was in the moment, his frame completely isolating you from anyone else, since you were at the end of the bar.
"Thanks," you said. "New year, new haircut is how the saying goes, I think."
Luke laughed nervously, sitting down on the barstool next to you. He had let his hair grow out over break, you noticed. He was turned towards you, trying to get you to talk to him. You felt your face get hot at the thought of him being right there. He was so close, yet the last time you saw him, he pushed you so far away.
"I didn't know you were here," he tried, wanting you to look at him. You couldn't help the scoff that escaped your mouth.
"Sure you weren't staring at me all night? Caroline said she caught you ignoring your date, Hughes."
You held back laughter at the way his eyes widened. Caught. The bartender finally turned your way and you ordered shots for you and your friends, handing him your fake ID and flashing a smile as he handed it back to you quickly. Luke asked for a soda and he went to prepare your orders.
"I didn't know you were seeing Chris."
"I'm not, he just has manners and actually enjoys being in my presence, Luke."
Luke coughed, trying to break up the awkward tension between you two. His mind went back to your first date, where he had taken you ice skating. He remembered how hard you laughed when you fell, needing him to lift you up and hold your hand tightly to stay upright. Even thought you barely knew each other outside of a mutual friend, the conversation flowed easily. You two had never been awkward around each other, even in the early stages of your relationship.
"So," Luke began.
You rolled your eyes and put your hands on your hips, turning square to him. His gaze dipped to your neckline where your chest was accentuated and you almost laughed. While you hadn't dressed for him that night, it was like fate brought him to you just so you could make him weak. Perfect.
"So?"
Couple years back so sensitive, yeah
Movin' like that gets repetitive, yeah
Singin' bout the same old stupid ass things
Sad girl bit got a little boring
"I haven't heard from you in a while, Y/N."
"Well, you weren't interested in texting me anyways so I thought it would be easiest," you taunted him. “Remember when you told me I was too much to deal with?”
"I wanted to apologize for that," Luke sighed. "I wasn't thinking straight and I took it out on you, I'm sorry."
"Glad it only took you two months to realize you were an asshole and lost the best thing you ever had."
Luke was stunned at your bluntness. You stared right at him when you said it, your confidence unwavering. Fake it until you make it right? Your heart was beating fast. You didn't really drink often, but when you did, Luke knew how unfiltered you could be. He always found it amusing, the way your cheeks would flush and how sassy you became. It never failed to make him feel hot all over.
"God, where is that fucking bartender?" You mumbled, quickly looking past Luke to avoid another awkward sentence spilling out of your mouth. You were already two drinks in and wanted to keep feeling good.
"You're right," Luke said, still staring at you. "I know you wouldn't say that if you were totally sober, but I agree. I fucked up and ruined us.”
You could barely focus as the bartender asked you for your card and you fumbled to get it out of your phone wallet. Luke quickly got his card out and handed it to the man instead.
"Luke, don't. You're not even supposed to be in here mid-season," you chided. "And you don't have to pay for me, we're not together."
“Would you ever want us to be together again?” Luke asked quickly.
Luke’s question made you freeze.
“I’m not doing this here, Luke.”
“Just answer the question, Y/N.”
“I never wanted us to be over, Luke. But you made me feel stupid for wanting all of the things you gave me at the very beginning. I wasn’t going to stick around just to get my heart broken.”
You felt lighter now that the truth was out in the open. You’re sure Luke knew it too, by the guilty look he wore on his face. Everyone told you how good you and Luke were good together, but it was the two of you that still couldn’t figure things out.
“What if we get out of here? We can talk about how terrible I was back at my place,” Luke asked. He looked hopeful, almost too content. Three months ago, you would’ve jumped to do anything Luke suggested, but now, with him taking another girl out and his actions, you swiftly shook your head.
“Can’t, the girls and I are staying out for the night. But I hope you have fun with Riley, enjoy your night, Hughes.”
The shots and his soda were set down in front of you, breaking up the moment.
“I hate when you call me that,” Luke grumbled. You smirked knowingly. You always called Luke by a nickname, never his last name.
“Well, I hate when my ex is at the bar with another girl, but here we are,” you fired back.
"Riley went off with some other guy. Her ex, I think," Luke admitted.
"Sounds like fun," you shrugged. You tried not to get your hopes up at his statement. Luke had hurt you in the past.
"We only went together because Rutger set us up, Y/N. I don't even know her."
"Well you looked pretty smitten with her from across the bar, Luke." You said back, not caring that you blew your nonchalant cover. You tried to pick up the small tray of drinks, but stumbled in your haste to steady yourself.
"She's not my type, I thought you of all people would know that, Y/N. She literally just went to go fuck her ex in the bathroom."
"That doesn't make me feel any better Luke, oh my god," you scoffed, a little disgusted that you knew more information about Riley than you needed to know.
"Y/N, wait," he urged, standing up now to tower over you again. Luke's skin was glowing from the heat in the place and he looked at you breathlessly. "Hear me out, please. I know I fucked up, I know that. But I was scared that you'd leave when I play pro hockey and I didn't want to get left behind."
You took in a breath, unable to say anything. Suddenly, it felt like you and Luke were the only ones in the whole room.
“Give me one more chance, please,” Luke said quietly. “I hate that I hurt you.”
No right way to say it,
Want you, so bad I hate it
Good girls, so overrated
So overrated...
As you held the tray, you quickly glanced over to your table, where your friends were staring at you. You were unsure of what to do. You could keep walking towards your friends, forget Luke, and move on with your life. Or, you could do what the new you would do-make him sweat over the mistakes he made, maybe end up in his bed.
“You sure you won’t get sick of me?” You questioned. For the first time that night, Luke could see how sincere you were, the old you that he had loved and lost. He wouldn’t mess up his chance again.
"I could never get sick of you, Y/N. I hated not being able to call or text you and I missed your hugs and the way you laugh when you watch The Office, because you always have it on and you love how sarcastic it is, and how you-" Luke couldn't finish what he was saying, even though you would've enjoyed hearing it, because you had put the tray back down and stood on your tippy toes to kiss him. Your lips crashed against his and you swore you could feel fireworks going off inside your body.
The drinks on the counter were forgotten as his hand traveled to your back, trying to pull you closer to him. He toppled back on his barstool and you stood between his legs, feeling him press up against you. You let out a breathy laugh as you realized how hard he was in his dress pants.
"Jesus, Luke," you whispered in his ear, dropping your head to his shoulder, only a little embarrassed that you just made out with him and your friends were probably watching.
"Don't laugh," he stuttered out. "It's been a long break." You could see how blown his pupils were, pure bliss all over his face as you stood eye to eye.
"I'm not laughing," you said, but couldn't help giggling. "And yeah, it was a long break without you, but I don’t ever want to fight like that again, Luke. I’m serious.”
"Don't move yet," he begged. Luke's hands found your waist and he held you in place, blocking the hard on he was sporting. You smirked as you ran a hand through his hair, you had never seen him so desperate before.
“I was trying to have a serious moment, Moosey.”
“I know, I just can’t focus, not when you’re in that dress,” Luke mumbled, face buried in your neck. You felt your whole body shiver and you knew you wouldn’t last too long. His breath danced along your neck, making you want more.
"I'm glad you like it," you whispered. "I guess I'll have to wear it more."
"Hope it's easy to take off," Luke trailed off, alluding to your intimate moments that he craved.
"Well, what if we move soon and we call an uber and go somewhere a little quieter than this? Then we can talk." You mused. He looked at you contentedly and nodded quickly.
"And you can drop off the shots as a peace offering to my friends when I grab my coat," you said. Luke looked a little nervous but you assured him your friends wouldn’t make a big deal. You knew you weren't very convincing, but it didn't matter, because Luke was practically jumping up to carry the tray of shots over to the table where your friends were sat. They tried not to stare at the two of you as you walked over, but it was no use. There were grins on all of their faces as you said your goodbyes and grabbed Luke’s hand to pull him out of the bar and into an Uber to start the real fun of the night. And if Luke pressed you up against the outside of bar, made out with you the whole uber ride, and kissed you until you knew nothing but his name, that was a secret you'd never tell.
Don't forget to like, reblog and comment! Let me know what you want to see next!
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callsignfate · 21 days
Note
HELLO HELLO! Happy New Year! From 1 to 10, how would you rate 2023? (10 being the BEST YEAR OF YOUR LIFE and 1 being the worst year)
It's not my first time reading your work (which is amazing), but it's my first time making a request in your blog. I don't see one of those posts with the rules and boundaries to make a request soooo I hope this isn't disrespecting any of your rules.
Valeria Garza could have any woman she wants by her side. But not her personal assistant (reader). Reader always kindly reject valeria every time she invites her on a date or for a drink. Valeria never understand why but respect her decision.
One day valeria finds out reader is a single mother!!
Reader rejects valeria not because she's not interested but because she thinks when valeria finds out she has a kid, she would change her mind.
Take your time and take care 🫶
Valeria x Single mother
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A/N: This is lightly edited as most posts might be for a bit, I'm just finishing all the drafts I left hanging and editing them as much as I can for the night. Thank you Anon for this idea and I have some fluff one-shots for this idea I might post as well. As for my 2023, it was rough so I would say 2 or 3 for most of it but it did have some nice times. Thank you for reading and I hope you enjoy!
TW: Mentions torture and hints to murder, child is gn! but referred to as beautiful.
Loving a woman who runs Las Almas would be a mistake, a huge mistake you always told yourself. Moving here to Las Almas to get away from the man who threatened everything you loved was one thing but to fall in love with a woman who was more dangerous than him was something you cursed at yourself for even thinking about it mentally every day.
The day you caved and took her offer to become some sort of secretary was one that you wish you could regret, but you often didn’t. The pay was great, giving you the chance to give you and your child something you dreamed of the day you had them. Stability. All you did was show people to her office and answer calls that weren’t the dangerous kind. Sometimes you’d keep track of whatever accounts she trusted you with and make sure nothing was coming in or out unexpectedly, easy enough.
You worked efficiently while you thought of the thing that usually plagued your mind, why you? She must have had hundreds of not thousands of people at her disposal, so why you? You didn’t let yourself think too deeply about it as the fear of losing the comfortable life you had made for you and your child over the now two years you worked for her.
You rarely missed days, only taking a few when your kid was sick or needed you, often saying instead that you were sick, she didn’t question it and never told you off for taking a day or two, only eyeing you slightly when you arrived back.
Valeria was always impressed with your work, she didn’t at first need a secretary, rather using it as an excuse to get closer to the woman who ran through her thoughts often when she first heard of a beautiful outsider's arrival to Las Almas, nothing came up that made her worry, and the few things she trusted you with at first always stayed in her inner circle so you were trustworthy, even if the things she told you at first were false, tests to see if the info would end up anywhere else.
As the months went on things got more comfortable, as she hoped they would. Hoping her little flirtatious comments would get through, they did most of the time, not that you weren’t quick to offer a small smile but quickly get back to the point of the conversation. The gifts she gave were met with endless thank you’s and a small smile before she'd find the items worth of money back into one of her accounts soon after.
Valeria was getting slightly impatient and confused, She could have anyone she wanted as most were at her feet, willing to receive gifts of her wealth that she rarely personally used on anything but well-made clothes or the standard needs for herself. Why weren’t you cracking? Why were you evading her efforts so well? Why were you so unwilling to take a gift, other than a holiday bonus? Many others have asked for this and tried to get close to El Sin Nombre for the same treatment you received.
The weekend rolled around again and like always she walked by your empty desk where you had always left a reminder sticky note for her, something that needed to be done over the weekend when you couldn't remind her yourself. She huffed and kept walking, taking a stroll through the streets of her empire for something to do wasn’t the worst idea, you told her many times to try it, and this once she did.
At first, Valeria walked with her men trailing her far back, looking as if they were too just strolling the bustling streets in the crowds. The store windows and many street vendors had nothing she could think of getting you that you wouldn’t return or pay her back for anyway. Valeria’s eyes scanned the street, and the people, many times over, until she spotted you being pulled around by a child who looked strikingly similar to you, you had an exhausted smile as you followed the kid seemingly pulling your arm off as you nodded and watched as the kid pointed to some toy a vendor was selling, she walked through the small crowds as she got closer to hear you talking, you were asking if they were sure if that's what they wanted, the kid nodded quickly, your back was to her but she could already tell that was you, and that was your child that held on tightly to your clothes with a tight fist, anxiously.
Before you could get out the money for the toy Valeria already paid for it, you looked over to her with a smile that fell into shock, the one secret you had desperately held on to, the one thing you had feared her finding out was now indisputable, there was nothing you could say to sway her otherwise. You stood there frozen before clearing your throat and trying to think of something, anything to say.
“Thank.. You.” You finally mumbled out before you looked down to see the toy already in their hands as they moved it around in the air, some dragon toy they had asked for many times, a toy they had only seen a few times because you didn’t want Valeria’s men to see you and possibly report back to her, you were so careful, your head felt like it was building with pressure, the soft thrumming your blood pumping through your veins filled your ears as you assumed they, like your face, were bright red.
Valeria noticed the shock and fear immediately, she wasn't a stranger to people looking at her like this, yet until now you hadn’t. You always had a polite smile and kind words to offer, even small talk when you both had the chance. Valeria was perfect at keeping her emotions hidden, yet this time she struggled to not react in any way to the fear that was so prevalent on your face that it looked like she had tied you to the chair and was getting ready to torture you.
Your mind was racing with anything to say or to do, but you felt paralyzed. She wouldn’t harm you but would she stop talking to you? Offering you small compliments and the job if she found out you were taking sick days for your child instead? You knew Valeria had a soft spot in her somewhere but were you in it?
“They’re beautiful, they look just like you,” Valeria said before offering them a piece of candy from the vendor, which she quickly paid for. Of course, they took it excitedly, with a small thank you before putting it in their mouth.
“Thank you… Again. I’m sorry I didn’t tell you, I just didn’t want you to worry I wouldn’t be there or that I.. single mothers are somewhat frowned upon sometimes and I-” You rambled on filled with anxiety that felt like the world around you was louder and brighter than before.
Valeria saw this quickly, how anxious you were, how you pulled your child behind you and pressed them against you, for a moment she wished she had a mother who was willing to stand in front of someone deadly and still put themselves between it all. She offered her normal smile and a laugh, hoping to ease your worries.
“I’m not worried, I’m guessing this is why you always told me no to my many advances,” Valeria said with an amused tone, finally realizing it wasn’t that you weren’t interested, but rather you were worried she’d perceive you differently. Valeria was happy to know that her killing that man who ended up putting hits out on you and hunting you down wasn’t a terrible Idea. She could see the smallest resemblance to the father's in the child's face.
“I don’t want anyone in my life that isn't supportive or willing to help me take care of my child, they are my priority, always.” You said as the confidence slowly filled your town, the protectiveness Valeria could see in your eyes.
Before Valeria could say another word, she watched as your child begged to be picked up which you obliged, struggling to carry the bags with everything else. Valeria sighed and clicked her tongue in disagreement while shaking her head before she slid the bags off of your shoulders and tilted her head for you to lead the way to wherever else you were headed.
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kvrokasaa · 2 months
Text
Friends to Lovers
cw: Isagi x reader, gn!reader, no pronouns mentioned, fluff, kissing, cringe, a mention of weed, I think that's all
wc: 766
a/n: lmk if you want to be tagged on each of my posts! No obligation whatsoever.
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"He's cute, right?"
You were pulled out of your thoughts, interrupted by a random girl you've never met before. She had a bright smile on her face, her eyes tracing the boy you were looking at. "Isagi-kun is super cute," she continued. "He's so shy too, which just makes him cuter." She giggles behind her palm. You internally cringed at the sound of her giggle, she was getting on your nerves.
"And he plays on the football team," she sighed, her eyes full of love. You know that Isagi doesn't belong to you, you're both just friends. But you can't help the jealousy looming through your mind.
"Yeah," you replied curtly.
Isagi has been your friend for over two years, and somewhere along the way, you developed feelings for him. So, hearing this girl talk about how cute he is, even though she doesn't know him, makes you want to cry.
...
You don't know how, but over the next few weeks you've become closer to the girl. You've learned that her name is Yuki and she's in your class, which you never knew. But the most annoying thing since meeting her is that she never stops talking about Isagi. Isagi this, Isagi that. Every time she brings him up you internally sigh.
"Can you set me up with him?" The surprise was evident on your face, those words were the ones you never expected to hear. Set them up? Set Isagi up with a different girl? You were lost in your thoughts, but Yuki thought that no answer was a good answer.
So over the past week, you've been trying to help her out, much to your dismay. Most of the attempts failed, especially the one where you tried to get them in a closet together.
And over the past week, Isagi noticed how weird you were being. He noticed how close you were getting with this girl, and he has to admit, she's annoying. She doesn't stop clinging to him, laughing obnoxiously at stupid jokes, and nonstop coming to his practices. Isagi specifically only invited you to his practices. Yuki's nonstop cheering always made him lose focus. Isagi doesn't know how many times he's glared at her. If looks can kill, she'd be dead, he only hoped.
Isagi just doesn't know how to tell you that he likes you, not her. He doesn't want Yuki's affection, he wants yours. Isagi just never got the chance to tell you.
Until now. A party at Reo's house, someone he went to Blue Lock with. The music was loud, the smell of weed filling the house. Everywhere but the room you were in with Isagi, Yuki, and a few others.
The bottle spun across the floor for the nth time. It stopped in front of Isagi, you were too afraid to see where the other side pointed. But a simple giggle from Yuki made you open your eyes. Your heart dropped, you can't say you're surprised. But, Isagi got up, walked over to you, and grabbed your hand. His grip was tight and firm, leading you outside the room.
"Isagi, you're supposed to go to the closet with Yuki." Despite your simple protest, you still followed his lead. "I don't care," he gritted out.
After a few minutes, you both made it outside. The cold air made you shiver, but the tension radiating from both you warmed you up.
"I don't care," he repeated. "I don't care about Yuki, I don't want Yuki." You cast your eyes down. Did you make your friendship weird? All because of Yuki? "I don't understand, you've been hanging around me and Yuki all week. I-"
"I'm not hanging around you two for her! I'm your friend, why would I be hanging around a girl I don't know?" Hearing him ask that made you realize that, maybe you were being a little too,, dumb.
"Right, I'm your friend." His eyes softened. Do you think he only sees you as a friend?
"Yeah, I'm your friend, but," he sighed. It's now or never. "I want to be more than friends." Isagi blushed as he looked down. He likes you back? "Really?"
He nodded, happy that he finally got it off his chest. "Yeah, I really like you." But his happiness quickly faded when he remembered that you never responded to his confession.
"Do you like me?" You smiled and leaned in your lips meeting his.
"Does that answer your question?" Isagi opened his eyes which were full of love and desperation. "Yes, baby, yes." His lips chased yours, needing to taste you again. "Please."
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Tags:
@priv-rose
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Text
Chapter 1
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Perfedious : A disloyal and faithless person.
Pairing : Yandere!Seokjin x female reader (Mirae)
Summary : You had dreamt of a beautiful man who held a diamond ring in his hand for you and the dream had come true when you saw Seokjin holding the same diamond ring and he slipped it on - your sister's finger - not yours. Sometimes what you want happens in the worst way possible.
Warnings : Heavy Angst, Family Problems, Age gap, Dilf, Dub-Con, Infidelity, Affair, Toxic Behaviour, Eventual Yandere, Eventual Smut, Just wait for Seokjin's dark Pov [hehehe].
WordCount : 4200+
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The bus engine roars to life and so does your heart, anticipating to be free from the weight it holds. As the vehicle pulls away from the curb, you sank deeper into your sit. You closed your eyes and drew out a sigh- surrendering and letting the bus drag you away from the sins you ploughed behind. Your weary eyes were fixated on the window, watching the cityscape fade away gradually. Slowly the streets grew smaller and blurrier.
You glimpsed at your reflection in the windowpane- hollow eyes tiredly fluttering. You saw the reminder of your pain decorating the red rims of your swollen eyes and that was enough to make your tears well up again. You clasped your lashes shut, guilty tears running down your pale cheeks.
In times when everything got too much. Too unbearable.
You'd done one and only one thing and that was runaway.
You'd go away.
Far away from home.
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Harsh remarks, biting sarcasm, belittling words, that was all your mother had for you. Maybe that was what came as second nature to all mothers. They often nagged and ranted to their children.You'd even asked your friend Ari, if her mother also shouted at her all the time.
"Yeah, she scolds me but she always hugs me and caresses me after that." You ten year old friend had told you.
But your mother never did the latter part. She'd just leave you all sad and sobbing alone.
No loving words, no soft caress and no motherly warmth. You never got that. Atleast not after your father left home untold. It was after that day, her resentment towards you and your sister grew like a dark creeper. You'd never known the reason until one day you did.
"Your father left me because I couldn't give him a son!! There was no other reason for him to leave!!" She had spat irrationally on your faces.
It had hurt a lot at the sprouting age of twelve when she called you and your sister a liability. Minsu was older by eight years. Despite getting the same harsh treatment as you, you'd always thought she was at least lucky to have spent more years in the presence of father when everything was well. Unlike you who got no parental love and care.
Your mother had nothing to give you except her indifference.
No love.
No warmth.
And at some point, you stopped craving and begging for it as a child.
As the irritable years went by, it became more and more unnerving. And you no longer wanted to live like a quiet and depressed child, so you rebelled. You'd throw back comments and on queue the whole house would fill with shouts and screams. You were a total of three ladies in the house but the volume of noises that were heard outside were ten folds.
Your mother didn't wavered by your teenage rebellion. She just got more chances to cause drama. Reasonless arguing and condescending words.
Even public humiliation, the one time she came to meet your homeroom teacher. Nothing was worse when Miss.Choi had awkwardly asked you if she was your stepmother because indeed she treated you like one.
It became so exhausting that you gave up on fights and found ways to escape.
You stayed extras in school, went for night camps and trips, you just ran away from home.
This kept you away from your mother's temper tantrums for days.
You'd sleep more peacefully under the open starry sky than the roof of your own home.
-----------------
You were seventeen, when you had quite fortunately stumbled into this good-looking young man.
That time your nose had almost flared in anger looking at the feets of the stranger who had made you fall down until you looked up to see a handsome face.
That was the very first time you saw Seokjin.
Your face had changed from a dark shade of red to light shade of pink as you awed beautiful man.You were literally ogling at him from your tumbled down position.He was in his creaseless suit and dress pants.You had pretended to not notice the buckle of your knees when you took in his appearance.
How could a person be so handsome?
Your next camping trip was filled with whispers and giggles about the handsome man you had encountered and quite obviously got a little crush on. Your friend Ari had teased you all along the trip.She'd winked and nudged you with mischievous eyes and playful smile whenever you both shared a task and left you flustered.
It was under the canvas tents, that Ari had filled your head with intriguing and exciting scenarios about the man while chattering like a gleeful cat who was happy for her best friend to find a man for herself. Though it was far from the truth.
That day a tender symphony had played faintly in your heart.
That night, you had dreamt about him out of your impending fascination and admiration. 'His broad back; adorned in a white tuxedo; facing you. And then he turned back slowly- you stared at his beutific face, then his styled hair, then his pillowy lips and then his pretty eyes which fluttered up to look at you. You saw the caves filled with gems and diamonds in his sparkling eyes. And then you saw the velvet box in his hand which extended towards you.The box opened to reveal a precious diamond ring glazing so brightly that you shut your eyes from its intensity.'
Only to open your eyes and see Ari's groggy face the next morning.
Just the reminder of the fantasy brought a blushing hue on your face and fluttery feeling in your stomach. When you told Ari, she had squealed so loud in the bus and grinned at you.
"Your eyes are literally shining since you saw him, you know that." Ari told you in excitement.
"In all honesty, we should really go find him and then why not give it a try!!" Ari suggested.
And you shushed her because the single thought of meeting him again gave you tingles everywhere.
You had seen many girls with teeny tiny crushes but never thought you'd be one.
But again
You knew you were being stupid to dream about a man who was probably twice your age.
But again
It wouldn't hurt to dream.
-------------------
In the drapes of spring blossom, your sister got married.
As the vows and kisses were exchanged beneath the flower beds, your heart too, like the petals, fell to the ground.
The diamond in her ring finger shined just like the coat of tears welling up in your eyes.
Happy tears and sad tears.
You feigned the biggest smile till your cheeks hurt.
You had never thought you'd be so upset from inside at your beloved sister's wedding but you couldn't help it.
It was worth a grimace how familiar her groom looked to the man in your dreams.
Because indeed it was him.
Kim Seokjin
What a laughable coincidence it was!
Everything had happened so abruptly.
On the day you returned from your trip, you saw Seokjin for the second time.
But the foolish grin on your face was wiped away the moment you saw him sitting on your couch with your sister.
Their hands were intertwined like lovers.
And you were more surprised to see your mother's pleased face, who soon after declared they could wed in the coming week. The little celebration was carried on with clinks of wine glasses and plates of special dishes.
And you sat there dumbfounded and baffled by the sudden decision.
Minsu hadn't said a single thing about this.
Your sad face never went unnoticed by her and she explained to you with a calm sigh,
" I know Rae, I'm sorry that I didn't tell you but I was unaware that he liked me just as much I liked him."
"And then he proposed to me all of a sudden and I didn't feel like there was a single reason to say no."
And then she smiled bashfully like a damsel.
"Fate is a wondrous thing, Rae. I'm so grateful to the scriptor above wrote him in my fate."
Damn the scriptor.
You stomach had churned when you asked her,
"Do you love him?"
She looked at your glassy eyes.
"Do you think I'll marry a man I don't love?"
"Ofcourse I love him. Who wouldn't?" You felt your breath sink from her last sentence. You had seen the love and sincerity in her eyes.
Then her gaze shifted with concern to you and she squeezed your shoulder lightly.
"You are happy, right?" She asked you.
Your eyes darted away. You couldn't do this to her. You would not crush over her man. You should not.
You pulled her in a tight hug and hid your face as hopeless tears ran down your cheeks. You didn't know why you were feeling this myriad of emotions all of a sudden.
You couldn't place your finger on what you were feeling. There were so many things at once.
"Ofcourse I'm happy for you. J-just don't forget about me. Don't leave me alone with that omen." You heard her chuckle as she patted your hair.
"I will never leave you Rae, I promise."
------------------
And that was how you stood beside her as her maid of honour. You stole a few glances at Seokjin who was so blissfully unaware about the way your heart and stomach felt tingles by looking at him.
You were so shameless to stare at him with intent just to see if he was really there and you weren't dreaming again.
You're not gonna lie but Seokjin looked so exquisite in his attire. So so beautiful that you almost got lost in watching him smile.
Seokjin wanted to have a small and uncrowded ceremony. He booked a hotel which was decorated like paradise. Interior graced with soft looking pink and white roses. And the garden was filled with cherry blossoms.
It was a wedding everyone dreamt of.
Under the trees, you sat with a pout and looked at the couple who were busy posing and capturing the memories of their wedding in the garden. Post wedding shoot.
Seokjin and Minsu,
They looked good together.
Now that you consider thinking, you were actually being childish and stupid to even have thought that you held any chance with him.
It was a stupid crush.
Little doration and little fascination, that was it all.
And it was plain stupid and dumb, to put so much strain and stress to your mind with whatever you were feeling.
Not only you but anyone would wish to have a man like him.
That's it.
One thing you knew was Minsu was dear to you and you'd do anything for.
So what you had to do now was let go of this stupid crush and the intrusive thoughts that came with it.
He was your brother in law now.
Avoid it or not.
And yet again you couldn't control the loud beating of your heart as he walked over to where you sat. Behind him, Minsu was still posing in her wedding gown.
You inhaled his expensive rosewood perfume as he sat down beside you.
Thank God your ears were covered by your hair or else he would have seen how red and hot they had turned.
"So, did you enjoy the wedding, Mirae?" He tried to strike a conversation with you.
You tried not to shy away from his gaze even if you were squealing inside just by hearing your name roll down his tongue.
" I-I did, it was gorgeous with all the flowers." You smiled and stared at the rose in his hand.
"And the food?"
" I didn't get to try the buffet yet because mother warned me to not eat before you both. I need to accompany you both."
Your voice grew smaller at the end thinking you spoke more than you needed to.
You heard his melodious chuckles looking at your frowning face.
"You don't need to worry about it, you can just go and have the food. Minsu had specially selected your favourite dishes."
Your eyes brightened at that and you looked up at him only to see him fondly smiling at you. He looked so princely. Your hands unintentionally squeezed the fabric of your baby pink dress.
You shook your head,
"No, I'll better wait for you both. And I guess Minsu's shoot is about to end."
You both looked at Minsu who was flaunting in her white gown ahead. Dangling a large bouquet of roses in her hand.
In your periphery, you saw him fiddling with a rose in his hand. He might have used it for the photoshoot.
You flinched when a blossom fell on you and he laughed at you. Your cheeks would have been dusted red by now.
"Why don't we go on a walk near the river until she gets back?"
He gestured towards the river at the other end of the garden. You gave a tiny nod and walked side by side.
The ceremony had ended by late noon and now the sun was dipping down the river. You had to crane your neck up just to look at his side face.
" I didn't get to ask this before but are you happy for your sister? "
You were stunned for a moment but put up a smile and replied,
"Yes, why would I not be? You both love each other and that's enough for me to be happy for her"
That's enough for me to let my chance go.
You were already getting tired to answer this same question again and again. Sick of convincing yourself that you were, happy.
You gulped when he observed your face for a few seconds, his eyes reflecting the golden sunset behind you and then he nodded.
Peering into his bourbon eyes was making your breath uneven. He was so so handsome, you had never witnessed a man like him. It was so hard for you to conceal the velvet fondness in your eyes.
You tried not to stare.
You tried not to show.
You were about to turn your face away to stare at the river on other side and also to hide your reddened face. But he tucked your elbow lightly,
"Wait"
His face was merely away from yours as he leaned down with furrowed brows. Your heart almost cried happily at his soft touch.
The symphony had come back and played in your heart again. Pellucid.
His leaned closer and his sweet wine-tinged breath hit you. Your legs were shaking under your frock. You were being skittish. If not for the light grasp he had on your hand, you would have staggered back and fell in the open river. Because your legs were out of control.
Like your heart.
Like your breath.
Like the ruby blood rushing to your full cheeks.
What were you feeling?
And what was he doing?
He plucked something from your lash and held the tiny piece of petal that had stuck in your lashes unknowingly.
"Uh, I saw this. It would have gone in your eye so I removed it."
He said simply as if he didnt just wrench your breath away and backed away.
You swiftly turned around to look at the shining ripples of water. Your eyes darted everywhere but at him.
You gasped when you saw something on the ground and crouched to pick it up.
Seokjin furrowed his eyebrows and leaned to look at the little leaf flat against your little palm, as you showed it to him.
A four-leaf clover
"You know it's so rare to find. Only the luckiest ones get the chance."
He was amused by hearing that and asked,
"So does it have more speciality?"
You nodded hurried and told him,
" Yes it does! The first three leaves are for hope, faith and love. And the fourth one which is rare to exist brings luck."
"Hmm..So aren't you the lucky one?"
You wanted to laugh and tell him that you were anything but.
It was ironic
To find a four clover on one your unluckiest days, if you put it out like that.
You grinned at him to hide your grimace and shrugged,
" I hope so I am."
" Ofcourse you are, now you got a brother-in-law at your side."
He said playfully and proudly.
Your insides winced at the mention of that awful term, you were already annoyed with that claim.
"But honestly, I will always love and protect Minsu, and hopefully take care of you too. I never thought I'd have such a little sister in law." He babbled his confession.
You had got so caught up with that 'take care of you too' that you didn't hear what he said next.
"I know how you two have been close and dealt with-with your mother, but I promise that- from now on I'll keep your sister happy."
You were melting at his words, at his need to constantly reassure you. That he found you important enough to assure it to. He was making you feel like the bigger person by saying those sugary words. And no one had ever taken that effort.
He even offered you the small pink rose in his hand to seal his promise.
And you took it with dreamy eyes, which you were sure won't get any sleep tonight.
--------------
The bus screeched to a halt. You stepped down clumsily, clutching your bag. The bus drove off and you spun to walk forward as strides of your heels hit the cobblestoned lane of the small town.
The memories of your childhood swirled around you, winding through the streets like fleeting chuckles. Lollipops. Paper windmills. Little balloons. Your father.
This was his hometown.
The breeze caressed your face as if reassuring you that everything will be alright. You reached the designated home and knocked on the wooden door, only to be greeted by your Grandma's mushy face which bloomed with a welcoming smile.
The haven of herbs and medicines greet you next. Your grandma was a traditional therapist. She was known around for her herbal therapy. Everyone came to her 'Healing Home' for cure.
And maybe you did too. You came here for a cure. To seek her healing water which would wash you off your sins. To seek a balm to treat the wounds of remorse.
And to seek a refugee to coop up your pathetic broken self in.
It came easy for you to conceal what's inside you- your feelings. Conceal. Hide. Obscure them. That was what you had done all your life.
So just like your feelings, you wanted to hide yourself to. Anywhere. Away from prying eyes. Distant the whispers of blame and shame in your head. Detach yourself from his lingering scent.
You wanted to hide away and curl and cry and sought and mend yourself. And nothing was better than your grandmother's mending shelter.
She offered you tea. Caramel evenings were spend with honey teas and baked cinnamon rolls. You talked to her and told her how you wanted to take a break away from the city. You lied to her that office work was stressing and making you sick. You needed time away from all that and find peace.
Away from home.
Away from him.
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Next I Main Masterlist
A/N : This chapter is pretty much about female mc and how she starts to like Seokjin.The seed is just sown. NGL it was way to angsty. Seokjin is good and kind in this and will be in further chapters until the facade slips.
Hope you all like this. Also comment if you wanna get added in the tag list.
@themochiverse
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