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doe-writes-stuff · 1 year

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You'd left. Off to take care of a personal matter in the west. Alone. With no way of knowing how long you'd be gone, or even if you'd come back at all, you'd parted on...strained terms. Despite the odds against ever seeing you again, Daryl made sure to keep a light on for you.

Daryl Dixon x Fem!Reader

WARNINGS: Slight angst, reader is described to have a female relative (relation not specified). Strong language, 18+ explicit sexual content, mixture of rough sex and slow body worship. Set during first half of season 9, but doesn't follow strict canon timeline or events.

"I should come with you."

"Daryl...you can't." You'd said, regret and guilt dripping from each word forced out of your mouth but doing your best to remain firm. They stung, but you didn't take them back. Didn't try to sugarcoat it. This wasn't easy on you, and no matter how much he understood why, it still hurt to hear. Watching you with your bag already packed hurt worse. "Rick needs you, Judith and Carol, and everyone else. It should just be me."

His head had shaken slowly. "They'll manage just fine without me for awhile."

"This could all be some pointless goose chase, and I...I feel bad enough even deciding to go, like I'm abandoning all of you, but..." He can see it, the way your eyes shine with unshed tears and the determination behind them to not let them fall. You hated crying. He knew that. "I need to do this. I need to know. She might still be out there."

"Don't mean you gotta do it alone, Y/N."

"I can't ask that of you."

"Don't have to."

"Daryl-"

"I mean it." He pushes, tone a bit more pressing than before. He shifts closer, drawing your eyes towards his own. He reaches down and takes your hands in his own, thumb idly brushing along your knuckles in comfort. "Goin' out there by yourself ain't safe. Ain't smart, neither. Need someone to have your back. Can't do things alone no more, you know that."

You're silent, worrying your lip beneath your teeth. He can't quite read the expression in your face, in your eyes. Your thoughts are too muddled, swirling with indecision and a plethora of emotions all vying for dominance. Terse seconds pass, silence between you, but eventually you've seem to come to a decision. His heart settles a little, satisfied that he'd made his case. Your head ducks down momentarily, which he takes as acceptance.

Daryl nods. "I'll tell Rick in the mornin' that we're leaving, maybe see if I can pack some extra provisions from the pantry. Doubt it'll take much convincin'. I brought back half that shit anyway."

The only response he gets is a small, slow nod. But it's agreement enough for him, and he pulls you into his arms. It's instinct now to relax under his protective embrace, allowing your fears and your guilts to fall away, if only for a moment. They'd come back in full when you next awoke.

"Come sleep." He mutters against your hair, feeling the way his lips press a kiss onto the crown of your head. Your eyes close. "We'll figure it out in the morning."

Your fingers clench against the back of his shirt, head buried into his chest. He's warm, the beat of his heart a comforting sound. One you know you'll be without for a long while. You make sure to breathe in his scent, filling your senses and making your decision all the harder to enforce.

And so you don't resist when he guides you back to bed, and you savor the way his hands feel on your skin. Devotion and love spill from his lips and yours. And when you lay beside him, listening to his even breathing as he falls asleep amongst the tousled covers, you try burning this memory into your head forever.

'Don't come looking for me.' 'I hope you can understand. I hope you can forgive me.' 'If it'd been Merle, wouldn't you feel the same?' 'I'm sorry. I will always love you, no matter what, no matter how long. Even if...I don't make it.'

Daryl stares down at the messily-scrawled note folded on his nightstand. He'd read at least 3 times by now, but had barely paid attention to the past few, the words blurring together. Noting the dried tear-stains on the edges, he feels a hollowness creep into his chest. It's as you say in your letter. Had it been Merle, all those years ago back at the prison, he'd have done the same.

He understands. He wished he didn't.

It would make it all easier to hate you. But he can't bring himself to.

The beginning days are the hardest. Your absence is a blatant, empty spot in his daily routine. He'd turn to say something to you, only for you to not be there. He'd stop by the house after hunts and scavenge missions to see you, only to remember the lights would be off and you'd not be home.

Each instance of forgetting, just for a split second, that you'd left sticks another proverbial knife in his chest and twists. They bring back the moment of discovering you'd left him behind all over again. It stung. It twisted the hilt a little bit more, digs the blade in a little deeper. It fucking sucked, each and every time.

Daryl had an excellent poker face, but even the others were beginning to notice how much it was affecting him. It was a lesson in patience, the amount of times he'd been asked if he was alright in those first few weeks after you'd left. Most of them he'd been able to field off with a gruff 'Just fine.' Others saw past the facade.

Rick had a good sense of things, and he knew Daryl well enough by now that his words often didn't tell the whole story when it came to those pesky internal 'feelings.' He'd asked him along on more scavenge runs, just to get him out of Alexandria. But of course, not one to pry too much into Daryl's business, he didn't ask the questions the hunter knew was hanging off the tip of his tongue.

Carol was one of them too, unsurprisingly. Half the time he thought she could read his mind. She made trips to Alexandria more often, popping over with pretty weak reasons for visiting from the Kingdom. She hovered, appearing at the most unpredictable of times. It didn't take a genius to know why. When Daryl least expected her, she'd be there with an offer to go hunt together. To go take care of Judith so Michonne and Rick could get out for awhile and spend some time beyond the walls.

It helped. He appreciated that Rick and Carol never pried. Rather, they were just...there. A companion to fill the long silences he found himself left with during the day. A distraction when he needed it most, since even solo outings past the walls were often filled with thoughts of you. Having someone else there eased the hurt, and muffled the many negative thoughts that clouded his mind in his moments of solitude.

Weeks stretched, and you were still gone. No means of communication meant Daryl was left to wonder about what you were doing, where you were, and if you were still even alive at all. It didn't get easier with time, the ache in his chest, the missing piece in his life. It just became familiar, and so he worked around it. Sidestepping it each and every morning until it was a constant numbness he had trained himself to ignore.

It was frightening, how easy it seemed to be. How easily he could seem to live without you around. Once upon a time, that didn't sound so feasible.

He felt guilty. He felt bitter.

He hoped you were doing ok.

Daryl didn't talk about you anymore. Not to others. And nowadays, Judith only occasionally brought up your name, asking where Aunt Y/N was, and when you'd be home. He was usually able to dodge an answer by offering to play a game.

There'd come a day when he couldn't get away with doing that, but...well, the time for that hadn't yet passed.

At some point, he'd quit counting the days. That didn't mean Daryl stopped missing you--he certainly still did. But the endless pull towards someone out there past the gates, miles and miles away, wasn't quite so strong. Whether it was a sign of him moving on, or just growing to accept the fact that you'd left...he still couldn't tell.

He didn't want to look into it all that much anyway.

Daryl hadn't heard anyone approaching as he stood smoking on the porch of his home. The wind was strong, and the neighbor's makeshift wind chimes had covered the sound.

"Borrow a smoke?"

His head whips back to see Rosita sauntering her way up to his home, arms crossed and hair tied back in a pony tail. He straightens, reaching up to the inside pocket of his vest to grab the pack of cigarettes as she stops a few feet away. Shaking one out, he hands it to her. After a flick of his lighter, the end begins to smoke and she takes a long drag.

"Thanks."

Daryl only hums in reply, standing there on this windy night, looking out towards the gated and walled entrance of Alexandria.

For several minutes, neither of them speak, enjoying their cigarette in companionable silence. Daryl wondered why Rosita was out so late, but figured maybe she just couldn't sleep.

Eventually, the minutes and lack of conversation gets to her, and she gives a quiet laugh, gesturing towards the door to Daryl's home. "You know you leave that lamp on every night in this front room?"

Daryl glances back, but only shakes his head. "I know."

"Drives Mrs. Beckett crazy." Rosita continues, flicking the ashes off of her cigarette, head nodding towards the house across from his. "Likes to bitch about how you're wasting electricity, or how she can't sleep because she knows it's on. It's like she can't talk about anything else."

"The grid can handle one fuckin' lamp." He mutters without further explanation, giving a shrug.

"I've told her that. So's Eugene, for what good that did." Rosita says with an amused smile, side-eyeing the hunter as she sucked down the last of her cigarette. She tosses it to the ground and digs it into the wood of the porch with her shoe. "Won't stop her from complaining about it, though."

He doesn't bother responding to that. Frankly, he didn't give a shit what Mrs. Beckett thought or wanted. He barely knew the old woman anyway.

"Why do you leave it on, anyway?"

This time, he doesn't say anything, just continues looking out towards the wall. He knows she's smart, that his silence speaks louder than any explanation would. Rosita figures it out quickly, and hums her understanding after a moment.

Another long pause settles, before she shifts in place and watches Daryl's closely when she speaks next. "I got talking with Eugene the other day."

Daryl had a feeling where this conversation was going--a place he didn't really want it to go--but obliged her clear bait anyway. "And?"

"Figured it was about 40 days to Cheyenne, on foot one way." She said carefully, not wanting to push too far, but hoping he still recognized she was worried about him. "35 if she pushed, and much less than that if she rigged a car."

Daryl knew what she was getting at, but still played dumb anyway. "So?"

Rosita saw right through him, but pointed out what they both knew despite that. "Daryl...it's been 6 months."

He straightened, agitation making him fidget, his jaw set tightly. "Don't mean a damn thing."

"Look, I'm all for holding out hope, but...at some point it's time to let go. How likely is it that she's still-"

"Think I'll turn in. Wind's gonna bring a storm tonight." He interrupted suddenly, not daring to look her in the face as he said his goodbye. "Best get headin' home."

He heard her sigh, and that tension in the air made it seem like she was about to say more. But in the end, she took the hint and descended the steps of his porch, footsteps heard walking down the sidewalk towards her own house.

For 8 months and 13 days, you'd been gone. And yet still, as you walked up that road towards the imposing walls of Alexandria, you felt like it was only yesterday that you'd snuck out the gates before the sun had come up.

The pack was heavy on your shoulders; not from supplies, but the weariness of a long journey. Of burdens and the weight of your decisions and actions. They settled, making your bones ache. But you felt lighter and lighter the closer you got to home.

Home. How you'd missed it so much.

And you'd missed him, too. Daryl had never left your mind. Not once.

Maybe the seasons had changed, but you recognized each abandoned car leading up to the Alexandria Safe Zone, even the particularly gnarled trees off to the side of the road. Little waypoints and landmarks that you'd memorized and passed by hundreds of times before. Now, each one seemed to propel your feet that little bit further, encouraging you to keep going.

Almost there.

And when those gates finally did come into view at the end of the road, you nearly cried. That feeling of relief as it washed over you was...immeasurable. Palpable and freeing. You couldn't begin to describe just how much it affected you.

There were, of course, look-outs at the gate for signs of approaching danger. And while you would've appreciated having been recognized after so many months away, you supposed that would have been too much to ask for.

"That's far enough!" The person on watch called, pointing a gun in your direction. From this distance, you couldn't tell who it might have been. "State your name and business!"

"My name's Y/N." You say, holding your hands out to make it clear you weren't holding onto a weapon. Your knife is clearly visible in its small sheath at your hip, but you weren't actively reaching for it. "I've been gone for a long time, but this is my home."

"Right." The person says with doubt clear in their tone. "As if I'd just believe you."

"I want to talk to Rick Grimes, then." You say calmly, smiling when the barrel of their gun lowered just a fraction. You felt a little silly having to name-drop some of the most influential members of the community, but whatever made them believe you, you supposed. "Or Daryl Dixon, or Michonne-"

"Alright, alright, hang on a second." They cried from the tower, lowering the gun and holding up a walkie talkie to their mouth. They spoke too low to hear, but you gathered they were calling into one of the three people you'd just mentioned.

You don't have to wait long, before a commotion on the other side of the gate alerts you to someone's approach. They call for the gate to open. Your heart soars, waiting to see a familiar face.

The metal gate slides open, and a man steps out cautiously. He's a bit rounder in the belly than you remembered--the benefits of safety in the end of days--and the full beard is new. But there's no mistaking the way he walks, and the way his eyes take you in when he steps past the gate's threshold.

A smile's broken out over your face as the two of you walk closer, until finally you embrace Rick with a tight hug, laughing at the reunion. If there was still any doubt that you were indeed a citizen of Alexandria, it was now dashed.

"About time you came home." He says in a rasp, patting his hand against your back in a comforting gesture. "It's been too long."

"I know. I'm sorry." You admit, guilt and regret coloring your voice. "I shouldn't have left."

You pull away, but Rick gets a good look at you and pats your shoulder with his hand. "You felt you had to. It's family. I understand."

You nod, on the verge of tears, but somehow managing to keep composed. "You're family too. Lost sight of that for a little while, I guess."

Rick waves you inside, giving a wave to the look-out at the on watch as a sign that everything was fine. You enter the walls for the first time in 8 months, admiring everything new and all that had stayed the same.

"How's Judith?" You ask.

"Growin' bigger every day. Can hardly believe she's already three." Rick smiles fondly, shaking his head. Then, he turns to look at you. "She asks for you, sometimes. Wonders where you've been."

The thought of seeing the youngest Grimes was appealing, though you were still weary from your travels. You probably didn't have the necessary energy to meet with her just yet.

"I'll see her once I've settled in." You promise, and Rick nods.

"It can wait 'til tomorrow. I'll let the others know you're back in the meantime."

Rick spends the next few minutes filling you in on all that you'd missed while on your trip. You're thankful to hear that most of it was minor little things. At least you hadn't missed another damn war, or anyone you loved dying. That would have been a lot to bear.

As you get closer to Daryl's home, Rick seems to remember something, and hesitates.

"Forgot to mention...Daryl's out on a hunt." He admits, no doubt crushing your hopes of reuniting with your partner that day. "Not sure when he'll be back, honestly, but I reckon he wouldn't mind if you were to stay in his home now that you're back. As I recall, you practically lived there anyway before you left."

Your laugh away the slight embarrassment at his observation, and the amusement is quite evident in his face. "Yeah, I guess that's true..."

"He'll be happy to see you." Rick states simply, stopping just outside Daryl's home as you approach.

"I hope so." You say, sudden doubt creeping in. You grimace a little, stopping at the stoop of the porch. "We didn't exactly...part on great terms. At least...I think so."

Rick reaches out and pats your shoulder again. "I won't lie, he took it hard. But I'm sure he'll make his peace with it, now that you're back. Love has a way of helping you sort things out."

And with that, he gives your shoulder a squeeze, before leaving you at the door to Daryl's home.

Something compels you to just take it all in. It was just like you remembered it being. A lamp stood lit behind the curtains in the front window. Strange...why leave the lights on when he wasn't home?

Stepping inside is a surreal mix of second nature and unknown territory. Daryl hadn't really changed anything in the interior; the couch and side tables and other trinkets around his home were exactly where you'd remembered them to be. But the atmosphere felt so...different. A little hollow.

Were you even still welcome here? You hoped so...

You deposit your pack next to the side table in the hallway, your usual spot for stuff after a run. Old habits, you thought to yourself. You'd put it back where it really went later on, but for now it would do. Your shoes went along with it, bare feet feeling blissfully unburdened without them on. Socked feet pad slowly throughout his home.

It's all just as you remembered, and your clothes are even still in the drawers in the bedroom. You figure that's a good sign, and change into something much more comfortable after a long-desired shower. The water is blissful on your skin, washing away the dirt of your traveling.

As you dry yourself and dress, you can't help but bury your nose in one of Daryl's shirts, reveling in the scent of safety and comfort. And while you may be missing the man himself, for now this would tide you over enough until his return.

With no pressing matters, and no clue as to what to even do now that you'd come home, you decide that a nap was much-needed. It may only be the afternoon, but the miles behind you were starting to make themselves known, lulling your eyelids heavier with fatigue.

You crash on the couch in a heap, falling asleep easier than you had in months.

Daryl didn't understand the knowing smile that Rick had given him upon returning to Alexandria late that night. Not to mention it was strange that Rick chose such a late hour to take watch. Not thinking much of it, he entered the gates and drove towards his home.

The rumble of his bike faded as he shut the engine off, popping the kickstand and standing from the bike. After a long two days of hunting with nothing to show for it, he was happy at the prospect of a nice, long sleep.

The house was dark, save for the light still on in the window, but he paid it no mind, closing the door and shrugging off his pack. He passed by the hallway side-table, setting it beside the other that was sitting by-

His steps halted, eyes swinging down to rivet themselves on something that was so incredibly familiar and yet so out of place. At first, it hadn't even registered that something was amiss. The sight of a pack here was so ingrained, that nothing had jumped out at him. But now...

He hadn't left that there. He didn't even own a backpack like that. But he recognized it all the same. And beside it...

Shoes.

A noise further into the house caught his attention. The spill of lights from the kitchen told him someone was there. He'd been certain to turn off all the lights before he'd left for his hunt.

And while a tiny sliver of his brain thought to suspect something malicious was going on--visitors didn't typically stop by at 2 in the morning--the hope that soared in his chest overpowered it.

It felt like the air was yanked from out of his lungs as he stopped just outside the kitchen entryway. There you stood, swaying back and forth to whatever music you were listening to in your headphones, the makings of a sandwich out before you. You faced away from him, unaware of his presence.

Daryl let out a stuttered breath as he ran a hand down his face, a swirl of different emotions welling in his chest. He was...pissed, actually. You'd left him behind all those months ago, lied to him to do it. All of the old anger bubbled and surfaced at the sight of you. He was hurt, wondering how you could have gone through with going off on your own, leaving your fellow survivors in your rearview.

At some point, he'd thought long and hard about exactly what he was going to say to you, should he get the chance. He'd known precisely all the bitter and spited words he'd want to throw into your face, telling you exactly what you'd put him through all this time.

He couldn't recall a damn single word of it now.

And despite how the wound had been ripped open seeing you in the flesh after all this time, despite the anger that raged and threatened to speak the venom that had once consumed him...he was too relieved to see you alive, safe, and in one piece to bother channeling that anger.

At the end of the day, you'd still come back. You'd come home. To him.

Instead, just below the relief of your return, rising steadily and with such intensity he hadn't anticipated, was a desire he hadn't felt for so long. How many nights had he lay awake, recalling memories of the softness of your body, the touch of your fingers on his skin? And now that he had you here...

His feet carry him forward before he can really think about what he was doing.

It's the movement in your peripheral vision that makes you look sharply up at him, startled but the sudden presence of someone else. You hadn't anticipated being interrupted during your midnight snack.

But he's here. He's there, getting closer by the second. You yank your headphones out, holding out a hand. You probably should have rehearsed what you'd say to him beforehand, to try easing the hurt and betrayal he must feel.

"Daryl, I'm sorry...I-"

You can't manage anything after that, given his lips smash to yours in a bruising and long-overdue kiss. Shock sets in for a single second, a mumbled grunt swallowed by his mouth, but then leaning into his embrace as his arms wrap around you, pulling you in, was instinctive. You fall into that familiar, safe feeling, wondering if perhaps this was always how your eventual reunion would have turned out. Daryl was always a man of action rather than words, anyway. The time for apologies could come later.

You can hardly breathe, locked in his arms, at his mercy. He kisses you like he never thought he'd ever get to again. And maybe for the longest time, that's exactly what he'd thought. A pang of guilt stabs you through the heart, realizing the sort of pain you'd caused him by leaving, but Daryl doesn't give you the chance to dwell on it, teeth slowly dragging back along your bottom lip and pulling a whine from your throat.

And, god, how desperate you sounded...it made him groan. That sound haunted him for weeks on end. How could you so easily rile him up like this? You leave for months, and all it takes is a pretty little noise to get his blood boiling with need. Fuck if he wasn't just as desperate for you, too...

He couldn't stop himself. Like a recovering addict caving, going back to his fix, his hands touch you any place he can reach, rough palms smoothing over your curves. The clothes in the way is annoying, confining. Part of him wants to yank and tear them away from you, but another side wants to try calming himself down, taking this first time together again slow. It had been so long, he didn't want to fuck up the first chance he could.

Your mind is a hazy fog of sudden lust, so much so you barely register the way he's reached down to lift you by your thighs and wrap you around his waist. His strength has you dizzy, drunk off of his scent and his warmth and the way his fingers dug into the skin on the back of your thighs. It made you tighten your legs around his waist, the sensation of him walking you somewhere else secondary to the way you did what little you could to grind yourself against the crotch of his jeans.

You wouldn't have been able to answer if later asked how you managed to get to the bedroom so quickly. One second you'd been in the kitchen, and the next you were being slammed onto the comforter by your back, Daryl's large and corded frame practically smothering you in the best way.

Your head tilting back with a pleased sigh, Daryl takes the opportunity to latch onto the exposed skin of your neck, intent to leave a mark. The thought of something permanent on you, from him--a sign of some sort that he couldn't put into words at the moment--felt important. And by the way you were moaning as he gave the flesh a rough suck, you seemed to agree.

One hand trails under and up his shirt, taking advantage of the closeness to explore the body you'd gone so long without once more. The familiar texture of scars in all the places you remembered. Muscles like gentle ridges under your fingers. They trail along his nipples, stroking in appreciation and pulling a surprised grunt from him, before frustration kicks in and you hastily tug the shirt up so he could take it off.

It's discarded somewhere behind you, and thus begins the frantic undressing of each other, heavy, panting breaths making it clear just how much neither of you were able to slow down now that you'd started. There'd never been a greater need to eliminate all barriers between you than now. As soon as his jeans and underwear are low enough to expose his hard length, your hand takes hold of it, giving him several loving pumps.

His curse is stuttered, wavering. Barely more than a huff of air released as the tension between you grows steadily. Daryl wastes no time in reaching for your wet cunt, two fingers plunging in without preamble. Your back arches up, wanting more. A keening noise escapes you, and hearing it just spurs him to start a fast and demanding pace as he fucks you with them.

The wet sounds they produce are obscene, but your head is nearly bursting with how damn good it all feels. You're a moaning mess, trying desperately to keep up with your own ministration of his cock, wrists working back and forth a little faster. His hips thrust into your hand instinctively, seeking more friction, a faster pace, something more. And while you know Daryl typically tries to keep quiet in the midst of sex, he just can't help the groans this time around.

Maneuvering your leg around his waist, you draw his hips closer to where you need him, lifting your own to brush your wetness against his hardened shaft, tantalizing and teasing. The time for foreplay was over, at least in your mind. Heart pounding a painful beat in your chest, you can't imagine waiting any further to feel him fill you entirely.

Daryl's fingers retreat from your wetness, and although their absence makes you groan, the press of his tip is more than enough to sate your once more.

Strangely, he doesn't immediately thrust in, rather pulling his head back enough to just...look at you. You look back, silent. One hand, still wet from your own arousal, trails delicately over your nakedness, over the curve of your hips and the sides of your breasts, as if reassuring himself that you were real. Or perhaps taking the opportunity to relish in having you underneath him once more. The jarring contrast to the frantic pace you'd both just been exhibiting has you blinking, struck silent.

But the moment is over almost as soon as it began, cut short by the jerking of Daryl's hips, sheathing himself fully to the hilt in one smooth motion. A mixture between a gasp and a whimper is jolted from your throat, the pleasure catching you entirely off guard. You barely have time to wrap both legs around his waist before he's setting a steady pace, his own ragged breath exhaled onto your shoulder.

He fucked you rough, sparing no time in reminding you of just how much pleasure you'd missed out on all these months. The familiar yet forgotten sensation of his cock stroking your inner walls had you crying out, overwhelmed, wanting more. Your nails dig into his skin, scratching and clawing when the pain only spurns him on faster.

You're mesmerized by the flexing of the muscles in his arms, hands planted on either side of your head on the comforter, fisting the fabric between his fingers as he pistons his cock deep inside of you. And when your eyes follow the arms up and peer into his face, his expression is a mixture of frustration and adoration the likes of which you had fantasized about during your many lonely nights.

Anger flowed like water behind his eyes, recognizable even now, but it never lasted long. Always overshadowed by such relief, such love, that you began to wonder if you'd ever seen it at all. Talking would come later. Right now, you both just needed him to fuck you until you couldn't stand up.

You weren't destined to last long. The time away meant that your orgasm built up much quicker than you would have hoped or expected. It just felt too good, having him atop you, inside of you, surrounding you this way. All you could see and breathe was Daryl, and that alone had your legs tensing around his hips in unspoken warning of your impending orgasm. With a responding groan, he understands, putting further effort into the snap of his hips, plunging even deeper than before.

When you cum, it's like white-hot frost crackling over your senses. Inch by inch, you feel yourself shudder, letting the peak of your pleasure overtake you until you're seeing black dots at the edge of your vision. Your limbs lock around Daryl like a vice, making it more difficult for him to move as you ride along the bliss. He grunts, unable to do much more than rut against you, chasing his own release in any way he can.

As the most of the orgasm passes, Daryl shifts and uses his hands to pry your legs apart, keeping them wide as he frantically thrusts, ragged breathing giving away just how close he was. You're a twitching heap beneath him, letting him seek that edge with your body, accepting the overstimulation in stride. When it nearly proves too much to bear anymore, he's stuttering a moan and slowing his hips down remarkably, chest heaving when he finally meets you over that crest.

Lazy thrusts work the both of you through your climaxes, and the rough and unrelenting pace that had been there just moments before slowed to a much more relaxed one. As Daryl caught his breath, he lowered his mouth to your skin, shaking hands caressing the sweaty skin he could reach, peppering kisses on your stomach and sternum.

You lack the breath to speak, and simply let all of your inner feelings shine through the gentle gaze you give him, tentatively reaching a hand up to glide your fingers through his hair. He always used to love when you did that, and it seemed that was still the case. His eyes closed in content at your touch, and he lowers his head to rest upon your chest.

Eventually, after dozens of minutes simply laying there, basking in the aftermath of your reunion, you summon the forethought to recognize you should probably clean up after your passionate fuck. The heat was slowly dying away, the house's draft that never seemed to go away chilling the sweat upon your skin. However, when you try to move, Daryl makes an effort to put a stop to it, leaning more heavily into you.

"Not yet" He mumbles gravely, not opening his eyes. You huff a breath, the corner of your mouth lifting in amusement.

"Daryl, we're all sticky and sweaty."

"Just...stay here." He says, eyes finally cracking open to peer into your own. And try as you might, you're at the mercy of the heartbreakingly pained gaze he directs at you. The vulnerability. The hurt. Months of uncertainty and guilt and anger stirred up into that one look, pleading for you to understand that he just needs you here. Right here, and nowhere else.

The amusement shifts into something gentler, and you give an affirmative nod, trailing one finger down his cheek. "Ok."

#daryl dixon #daryl Dixon x reader #fem reader #the walking dead x reader #twd #the walking dead #scenario #daryl Dixon smut

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bebobeboben · 5 months

Text

Hi! @ligiawrites, I'm the anon who asked about the story a few days ago. sorry it's taken so long I got shy and didn't want to post it😭😭

(disclaimer: I haven't played the game in a while so forgive me for any ooc behaviour and/or canon divergence)

.·:*¨༺ ༻¨*:·.

“We cannot be together, My Liege. You are to be King, and I am nothing more than a Knight from a simple bourgeoisie. I am your servant.”

“But Adicia...”

“Mathias.”

He looks shocked. Why won't he understand what I'm saying is for his own good. A King and a Knight...

We would have never worked.

“We may have spent a night together all those years ago, yes, but that does not mean my feelings for you now are the same as then.”

I step forward and peered into his eyes when I realised, he was drunk.

His face was flushed; his pupils blown. All the emotions he had bottled up had spilt. I should've realised; we had done so well in avoiding talking about this, it was obvious that one of us would be inebriated when we finally had this conversation.

It mattered not what I said from here on out, it would all be forgotten. Hazy memories from a drunken dream. He would not believe it real, even if I had mentioned it. He has had plenty of dreams about me, he had told me as such.

I reached out to cup his face with one of my hands. He relaxed at my touch, much unlike how he reacts without the help of alcohol,

“I care for you, Mathias. I really do. But we can't ever be together. As I said before, you are the next King. You're to be coronated tomorrow. Neither of us need the consequences of a relationship at mind. What would the nobles of high society think? What would your mother think?”

He looks uncertain. He stays quiet, in the dark I'm not sure if he’s fallen asleep in my hands or merely contemplating what I've said .

“Mathias.”

“I, I don't care what the nobles think. Or what mother thinks! I love you Adicia! More than anything. A world without being with you is not a world worth living for.”

I've noticed that on the occasions he gets drunk, he always has a flare for theatrics.

“I'll always be with you Mathias, just... not in the sense you're hoping. One day you will be betrothed to someone beautiful, someone who can help you rule, and you'll forget all about the feelings you have for me. You and I will simply be a fleeting memory.”

“I could never forget you Adicia. I'll find a way for us to be together. Just wait. When I'm King nobody will dare to say a word against me.”

I smile, whenever he puts his mind to something, it's always been hard to sway him.

We draw closer the fire crackling being the only sound in the room apart from our breathing. He puts his hands on my waist and pulls me flush against him. My heavy metal armour pressing against the soft fabric of his clothes. I wonder if it hurts. The hand I left on his cheek moves upwards and becomes entangled in his long hair. He moves his face forward just centimetres away from mine and I can feel his breath on my face. He draws closer still. I wonder if he understands the complications of what would happen if people found out about this. About us.

And even with all the protesting I had done earlier, I wished for this with every fibre of my being.

Our lips finally touch, and its soft.

So soft, I could barely feel it against my lips. I want more. I want to kiss him harder, to replicate that night, all those years ago.

But we can’t. I pull away from him. He’s confused. A sad smile plays at my lips.

“Good night, Mathias,” I tuck a strand of hair behind his ear, “You need to be well rested for tomorrow.”

With that I turn and head for the hidden door leading to my chambers. The last thing I see before heading into my room his is face. A mixture of hurt, and betrayal. It seems he thought our feelings were mutual. That we would both do anything for us to be together.

I stare at him for a moment before fixing my expression into the one I always wear around him. One of indifference. As if I don't care about him. When it's in fact the opposite. Once again, he looks shocked.

I finally head into my chambers and close the door. How I feel about him now doesn't matter. Because tomorrow we will go back to playing our roles. His, the Crown Prince of Opala, and mine, the outcast knight.

Tomorrow we will act as though this never happened. We will act as though we didn’t confess our love. Act as though we didn't kiss. As though we never shared a night together. As though the feelings between us don't exist. Just as we had always done.

But can we keep it up much longer? He knows now that I truly love him too. But will he act on it, is the question. He knows he is to be King, and he knows what the consequences of our relationship would be.

Before we were King and Knight, we were Prince and Whipping boy.

Whipping boy. It mattered not that I was a woman. I wasn’t a proper noble by anyone’s standards.

To be in a relationship with him would cause this country’s faith in him to crumble. It was already weak, given that we had only just won the war against Topazio by the skin of our teeth.

A King with a country that didn’t love him? I would not let that happen. I had promised the Queen after all. But I had also promised her that I would remember one thing; to keep the boundaries between me and Mathias in place. After all she had done for me, how could I refuse? She knew of our feelings and yet she said that anyway.

If it was for the sake of my Kingdom, I would do anything. But it makes me wonder, for the sake of Mathias, what wouldn’t I do? This is why I will close my heart off. To him, to the Queen, to everyone. Closing my heart to him is the only way Mathias can grow into a good King for his country. I would only hinder him.

Perhaps once he becomes King, I will leave. My current status could never make up for my sins. Knight Valência would make a better Dragon Commander than I. A better bodyguard too.

I can hear thumps and crashes coming from Mathias’s room. He is either being attacked, or, in his drunken state, fumbling around in the dark. It makes me smile, to think of My Prince stumbling in the dark like a fool. It all stops, and soft snores begin to be heard.

Waiting a few moments to confirm he is asleep; I begin to remove the heavy armour. Placing it on its wooden stand. It feels as though a literal weight is being lifted off my shoulders. Although the real weight I carry will never be lifted. I place my sword beside my bedside and climb into bed. It would take a while for sleep to truly set in. I must not allow my feelings to take control of me, as they just had. It could jeopardise the safety of My Liege and those surrounding us.

I dream again that night, one of many. I dream of Mathias, of what we are and what we could’ve been. I dream of my family, something I had not done in a long time. I dream of Mandra- Mandreis. Of what happened that day. How they reacted to what happened, and how I wish I did things differently.

There were many things as to which I was uncertain after our confrontation, but there was one thing I was certain for: no matter what, I would do what was necessary for my country and My Prince- no, My King. Whether it be staying with him for the rest of my days or leaving without a trace.

Before myself, My Liege would always come first. Which is why we can never be together.

I close my eyes and once again succumb to sleep's warm embrace.

#ltgbtk #love the guard be the king #fanfic

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wellfine · 2 years

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I had a small question for you: I've noticed your body types and details when it comes to characters feel very human. Little traits in body refs come together very well in your designs. Because of how well you can convey these things, I was wondering if there are any OP characters that are more difficult for you to draw? Be it design wise or translating the OP style to your own? Hope this isn't an odd thing to ask haha

Not odd at all, this is a really interesting ask! I always love an opportunity to talk about why I draw things the way I do haha... Also I'm so flattered you feel that way, body variations are something I find really interesting and gratifying to draw so I'm glad people pick up on them and like them too!

HMMmmm... Honestly I find it harder to translate faces to my style than bodies HAHA. There are sooo many interesting body silhouettes in One Piece that I find it more of a fun puzzle trying to translate them! Montblanc Cricket is definitely a challenge for example because his body shape is sooo extreme (dat neck. You know Zoro's jealous) but that's part of why I like his design/drawing him.

I mean okay the hardest Straw Hat for me to draw is Brook LMAO but I feel like that's cheating because you have to be so precise with all those bones. Body-wise... maybe Nami? It took me a long time to decide on what kind of body type vibes she was giving me before I decided she was kind of beanstalk-y but with big boob implants. I try and draw her boobs to look fake on purpose contrasted with, say, Robin or Tashigi, and I hope it comes across. I just think it's in-character that if her boobs got notably bigger after the time skip, well, it's because she wanted big old honkers lmao!

Zoro is also difficult sometimes because I imagine his body changes appearance a lot, not just because he gains muscle steadily over the series, but even on a shorter scale he probably fluctuates between bulking and cutting. I find it enjoyable to draw him at various stages but it does mean he looks inconsistent in my art sometimes and occasionally I worry that people won't understand my intent. Sanji can also be difficult to get the right proportions for because his muscle composition is so unbalanced, like some kind of hyper-cyclist, but I don't want to make him look absurd out of context either.

I'm not a furry artist by nature (despite Everything) so the hardest body types for me to translate are definitely animalistic characters, whether they're Zoan types or Minks! Chopper and Pedro are still hard for me to draw, for example, even if Minks mostly just have humanoid body shapes covered in hair. I have a hard time clicking with them. Interestingly fishmen/mermaids are not as difficult - I think because they're more fantastical, you can be less 'accurate'?

I'm trying to think of non-Straw Hat characters... Honestly I have a much harder time drawing faces than bodies. I'm working on it. I think my headcanon for Law's body type is at odds with a lot of other fans' LOL (same as me seeing Sanji without a shred of ass), I just can't see him as being muscular at all - he strikes me as the type who barely eats enough and doesn't really work out so he's all gaunt and gangly. Kid is WIIIDDEE which is fun to draw but sometimes hard to get the proportions of. One Piece women tend to be harder to translate to my style than men because their canon body types are so much less diverse :/ but I do enjoy it too. Vivi was hard for me to settle on but I like the body type headcanon I have for her now - I just haven't had time to draw it LMAO. Oh, and Yamato can be hard, but for kind of different reasons. His body is so politicised I know I'm going to get weird comments no matter how I draw him. Giving him top surgery makes me personally feel more comfortable in some ways (visibly denouncing transphobes etc) but less comfortable in others (implying that top surgery is necessary to be transmasc etc). But that's a different kind of difficulty. I still enjoy drawing him.

Inorganic shapes are much harder for me to draw so I would say the hardest OP characters for me are characters like Franky or Brook who have bone/cyborg parts! I love Franky's post-timeskip silhouette (sir your A-frame) but I always struggle with his shoulders and forearms because they're not organic shapes so inconsistencies/scale inaccuracies are way more obvious. Sometimes Fishmen designs fit into this category a bit too.

I hope there was something useful or interesting in that answer somewhere! For me personally I would say - based on bodies only - the Straw Hats scale from easiest -> hardest to draw is: Usopp -> Luffy -> Zoro -> Sanji -> Robin -> Nami -> Jinbe -> Franky -> Chopper -> Brook. Usopp is hands-down easiest for me because I take a lot of inspo for him from my boyfriend so it comes surprisingly naturally. (Love u baby)

Thank you again for such an interesting ask and for letting me indulge in talking about myself for so long, I always enjoy asks like this!

#long post #Tumblr is a way better platform to talk about this stuff than twitter so I hope I appear approachable about this kind of thing #if you're curious about my reasoning or technique or whatever then send an ask! worst case scenario I simply ignore it #probably because I ment to respond but got busy and forgot and then felt awkward. sorry. it's not your fault

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mungoose · 2 years

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When you can't finish writing a fic so you instead write headcanons that basically turn into a short fic.*sigh* Here also have my shitty phone edit, cuz there's zero drawing energy :P

(Please accept my dyslexic non-native speaker Mungrove trash that I humbly present you.)

Eddie has decided that they are going to be friends. People aren't allowed to sit alone apparently. Or sulk in corners. Billy hasn't been back for long and honestly he has a hard time dealing with all the trauma. He doesn't have the energy to pretend that everything is fine or that he's the king of the hill anymore.

He doesn't understand how, but Eddie worms his way in real easy. He's disarmingly friendly and makes him laugh for the first time in a long time. And just like that Billy is suddenly trailing after him like a lost puppy begging for scraps.

Eddie saw his discomfort around the world saving gang they were saddled with and decided to become a buffer between them. How he manages to do it without pressing any of Billy's buttons baffles him just as much as it baffles Max. She won't even be subtle about it, will just straight up gape at him if he doesn't act like normal.

This one time Billy snapped at the kids, trying to intimidate them, so Eddie snapped right back. But he also calmly explained why not to do it and then laid down some rules.

Usually rules make Billy want to break them. But Eddie isn't unreasonable, he doesn't shame Billy. He just wants him to be better and adjust. Billy can do that, especially now that he has someone that believes he can. Someone in his corner.

Because Eddie doesn't take others snapping at Billy either. He will bodily stop fights before they happened, which is stupid, Billy is stronger than him and Eddie is fully aware of that, since they play-fight and wrestle regularly.

Eddie just doesn't take bullshit from anyone and will loudly point out discrepancies. He couldn't care less about whether he's making a fool out of himself or not– he'll act like some jester even –if only it diffuses the arguments.

When Billy gets worked up about shit and the walls start closing in, Eddie will straight up just sit on him. Make him lay down on the floor and straddle his stomach. Force him to slow his breathing. If he's lucky Eddie will lean down and hug him. Tears don't feel as shameful if he hides them in Eddie's hair.

Sometimes Eddie makes him feel like he's an aggressive abused dog Ed adopted at the pound. One that gets showered in affection and is gently corrected before it bites. He has caught himself more than once looking to him for approval after interacting with other people and thats fucked right? He used to be at the top of the food chain, people looked to him for that shit.

Ed has really good weed and he lets Billy steal the joints right from his lips without complaining, because Eddie is a sharer. He will share anything with Billy, music, food, alcohol, weed, jewelry, bed and any clothes that fit him. After a while he even makes Billy share his friends.

Argyle is easy, he's from Cali too and stoner chill. He also makes amazing food, even when high as a kite. Jonathan is harder, it takes for them to have a munchie talk, where Eddie joins in and they bash their shitty fathers. They found common ground there and after Billy promises to beat the ever living shit out of anyone harassing Will, which diffused any lingering tension.

Billy really likes Gareth, dude has some rage issue of his own, so Eddie must have found loads of practice here in how to handle Billy's moods. They regularly hang out in the junkyard trashing shit. Eddie's other band members join them at the quarry to throw rocks like they are all ten again. Only now there's beer and good music.

How can Eddie be such a nerdy dork and then shred like a god on his NJ Warlock? It's unfair how he can just shed his small town skin and suddenly ooze that confident sexappeal. Billy is in trouble isn't he?

He hangs around when they have band practice. Sure, they play a lot of covers, as new small bands do. But they're good at it. Their originals are actually pretty decent too. Billy likes just lazing about on their old stuffy couch and wonder if he would be any good at playing something himself.

Eventually Eddie spots that spark of interest and has Jeff help in teaching him guitar and Frank the bass. He chooses the guitar, an acoustic one for now, since it's easier to practice with. It's not like he's joining the band, just getting a new hobby. At least that's the original plan. He's getting obsessed with getting good at it quickly though.

Since he's spending most of his free time with Eddie now– how did that even happen –he can't avoid being exposed to Eddie's other hobbies, mainly DnD. Billy knows he's truly fucked when he actually starts considering joining in. Ed speaking so passionately about something, even if it's super nerdy, just makes Billy smile softly at him instead of feeling annoyed.

So he has a mental breakdown. He's finally fallen in love with someone and it's Eddie the freak Munson, a guy, who is currently his best friend. Who strolled into the imaginary dog-pound and said "I'll pick that one, the one nobody wants. The one you want to put down. All he needs is to feel safe and loved."

And Eddie succeeded. And it fucking terrifies Billy. Because what if Eddie doesn't want him, like that? What if he accidentally lets some of his true feelings slip and he loses the best thing he's ever had? What if he realizes that Billy's been making up these elaborate reasons and excuses to share his bed, because of some not so innocent feelings? That Billy is actually a creep, that likes to be surrounded by the smell of him, that he sniffs the shirts and hoodies he borrows? Thinks of him when he cums?

Billy is a coward, but he's also weak. And so even if he does try to distance himself, he always folds when Eddie chases after him. Now it feels like they're back to before, when they first met and Eddie would lure him in with treats and gentle affection.

Steve's friend Robin– a very blunt but friendly girl –tells him he's being an idiot. That he's actually really hurting Eddie like this and should just come out and admit his feelings, because everyone in the group knows except Ed. Apparently Billy isn't exactly being subtle with the way he looks at him.

Steve claps him on the shoulder and reminds him how open, accepting and kind Eddie really is. He's not going to have a negative reaction even if he ends up not being interested. Honestly, Billy knows he's right. He should just rip off the bandaid, because hurting Eddie is the last thing he wants to do.

So he does, nervous like nothing else. To a point where Eddie freaks out thinking Billy is about to tell him something awful. And then when it's out, Eddie just sits there staring blankly at him before laughing so hard he cries. The emotional whiplash of the situation makes Billy want to storm off but Eddie grabs him and kisses him.

Billy will never admit to the sound he makes and kissed him back like his life depends on it. Kissing someone has never felt this good, has never made him feel this much joy.

According to Eddie, he's really dense because he's been flirting with Billy shamelessly for months. But Billy just thought it was playful banter. Bros call each other baby and babe all the time right? In a playful totally not gay way, right? It made Billy's insides squirm, Eddie's too apparently and turns out it feels a million times better when you know you both do actually mean it in a gay way.

Anyway, guess he has a boyfriend now. Eddie Munson, a nerdy, kind, somehow also sexy, freak and most importantly:

The love of his life.

I don't know what I'm doing. Satan take the wheel!

#mungrove #billy hargrove #eddie munson #my posts #my edits #i wrote something #I see that many of us think of Billy as an abused dog who needs to be showered in love.#Like he might bite but honestly that's ok ♡#Eddie is a giver of affection and anything else you might need #Soft nerdy boi ♡

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moonlit-rabbit · 2 years

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Brother dearest • Prologue

Just a short angst fic about Rubedo, Nigredo, Citrinitas, and Abedo.

Not really lore accurate.

I always wondered why my younger brother was the favoured one.

It was all so unfair.

How my mother looked at him with pride and adoration while she looked at me with silent disappointment and dismissed me whenever I was near her. And then finally, she fed me to my eldest brother who pitied me yet obliged to her order.

I spent a long time thinking about why, yet I seem to never find out the answer. Am I that worthless? Am I undeserving of love? My mother probably thought so for she never taught me what she taught Albedo.

What's so special about him? Was it because Celestia recognized him as human?

I thought about all whilst I sat on one of the mountains, a smaller blonde with pink eyes beside me.

"I'm just doing this because he stole my birthright." I explained as if the lookalike could comprehend it. I honestly don't expect much... Then I felt something brush on my hand. I turned to look at him, shocked.

"Ru... Bedo... Understands papa..." I froze. Papa? I never taught him that word! But then I laid my eyes on a children's book I stole from Albedo when he was out. It was a yellow book with cartoonish drawings, but I didn't think much of it.

"Citrinitas... Don't deserve name Albedo..." My heart swelled somehow... What is this feeling? "Yes. He doesn't deserve the name Albedo." I raised my shakey hand and scratched his head. He smiled with content.

Nigredo. My brother, Durin. His body dark as his name. The first creation. I remember when I first came to be. He carressed by hair and welcomed me to life.

My youngest brother... Citrinitas. True to his name, he outshines everyone. He took my name and the love of our mother. The golden child.

I, Albedo. Whiteness. I am but a blank canvas. Bland and ordinary compared to my brothers. Yet the most human name of them all. Is that why my mother gave him my name? Because he acted human?

And Rubedo. Poor him. He embodied my rage. I.. Why am I acting like her now.

Why?..

"Papa, don't sad Rubedo don't like see you sad." Rubedo... No. My son grasped my sleeve and looked at me with big emotionless eyes yet his words hit me harder than any emotion.

I gulped the invisible ball in my throat and open' closed my mouth like a fish out of water. After a few minutes I finally had the courage to utter out a few words.

"... Papa... Is sorry." I hunched my body towards him and let out a sob. I felt familiar hot liquid pour out of my eyes.

"Papa is so sorry..." I sniffed and sniffed, not daring to look at my son for I have thought of something so unreadable. I was filled with shame, guilt, and anger.

I now understand why my mother disliked me.

“I don't think my mum likes me very much...“

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s1l4s-l1k3s-t0m4t03s · 26 days

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tw: ana, body shaming, body dysmorphia

this is kinda long so I totally understand if you don't want to read it :]

I think I might be developing ana

I'm really scared and I'm scared to tell my therapist or my parents because I'm worried they'll make me go to the mental hospital

my friends know and now at lunch or any time we eat together I can feel them looking at me and sometimes they ask me if I feel okay enough to eat which I can't stand

them drawing focus to food makes it so much harder to eat, it's so much easier when no one's paying attention to me

eating around people makes me extremely anxious and now I kinda regret telling my friends about this because now I just feel like they're pitying me every time we eat

I hate that I love the feeling of being hungry

I hate that I love how lightheaded and weak I feel after not having eaten anything all day

I hate how I hate my skinny body but I hate the idea of gaining weight even though I KNOW there's absolutely nothing wrong with it

I hate how difficult it is to find a chest binder that's small enough for me

I can't stand how many people think it's okay to comment on my body

I wear baggy clothes because I hate when people comment that I need to eat more after seeing how bony I am

I'm naturally skinny too, so I've heard this shit all my life "you need to eat more, you're too skinny" okay well how about fuck you for making me feel like shit about my perfectly healthy body

I think those comments are why I'm so anxious to eat around other people

I wish I could just be a normal teenager and eat more than 10 bites of plain pasta around my friends at lunch

with my body dysmorphia and gender dysphoria it's so hard to like the way I look

the only thing I like about the way I look is my hair (I have bright pink hair) but even still one of my friends always tells me how much she dislikes it and wishes I had brown hair because she never saw me with natural hair

and I have a feeling the guys in my grade think it's weird and I'm weird (that sterotypical emo kid with the emo haircut who uses he/they pronouns but wears skirts sometimes and has pink hair so obviously that just means they're a girl who's doing it for attention)

anyways sorry for the really long vent and thanks for actually listening to me if you made it this far. I hope things get better for you bc I know we're both just strangers on the internet but I really sincerely think that things will get better for you.

I'll end it lighter by asking: what's your favorite PTV song? I really love Stained Glass Eyes And Colorful Tears and Besitos :3

hii!! im so so sorry your dealing with that. by the soundd of it, your developing ed behaviours, if not, an ed. i understand the trans thing, about dressing or looking not stereotypically like a male/masc person yet still identifying as one. there is no right way to trans. your doing it right, your perfectly valif no matter how you look or whether you pass or not. people that point out your appearance are purely insecurr within themselves. you dont ever see secure people bullyinh do you??

with the eating thjng. they cant send you to a m3ntal h○spital unless you are a danger to somebody or yourself. if you are ☆ving yourself, there is a slihht chsnce you coukd get sent there. i would recommrned sayinh you are thinking of doing it, or beginnjng to develop so you can still get help, but not sent away.

if you dont feel comfortable eating arounf people, or are worried about people drawing attention to you, id recommened either flat out saying the topic of food makes you uncomfprtable, or eating when you get home. i get that fullt, im in a weird limbo between recovering and r3lasping, i eat a bit at school and the rest/something else at home.

weight gain can be scary, yes. i get that fully, you are not alone. but it doesnt change your worth at all. your still perfectly valid and fine, it may change your appearance but it doesmt take away from you as a person.

with the bindijg, if you cant currently get a binder, you can try transtape. if you have sensory issues, theres smt cslled milk of magnesia (liquid) you can put on the skin, let it dry fullt snd then apply the tape. if your struggling with the thought of gaining weight, but also not havjng the measurements to buy a binder, you could make it a goal.

"when i get to (xyz) weight, i can get a binder".

things like thst.

other than that im in the middle of class rn so my brain is a bit blank lmaoo

im very proud of you for venting dude, im so so sorry your exeperiencing this. try to get help, snd get out of ana as soon as possible if you can. itll mess you up for ljfe and you dont deserve thay.

my fav ptv song is today i saw the whole world (acousric ver) :) <3

edit:i would like to add, you dont need to change. even if you eat more and dont gain weight, thats perfectly fine. aim to be healthy,not to look a certain way or to be a certain weight :3 you do not ever need to change for somebody else

#silas tag!#thanks anon!#anon tag

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nbmahoushoujo · 2 years

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i draw really short hair rarely enough that in between every time i do it i forget just how difficult it is

#millie.txt #i don't understand why it's so much harder than drawing long hair #there's less of it! it should be easy!#loid forger get longer hair please #i'll take millicent's braids over this any day #at least braids have a logical pattern #short hair where are you coming from and where do you end??#normally i'd add a wip to a post like this but i have nothing i'm starting the hair over and over again

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headspace-hotel · 2 years

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questions i think about

Would we know if dinosaurs domesticated other dinosaurs?

What is domestication, anyway? Just another form of symbiosis? We know who is the passive and who is the active participant in our relationship with our domesticated creatures, right? Is it about control? Is it about intent?

We have evolved lactase persistence in some populations to drink milk. Did goats or cattle domesticate us?

How strange it must be to be a coffee plant, that became so poisonous that creatures wanted to eat it even more to become poisoned.

What kinds of symbiosis will we never know about?

Which creature invented symbiosis?

Did dinosaurs love their young?

What was the first creature to have loved something?

Do plants love the sun?

Do plants worship the sun?

Is belief necessary for worship?

Which creature invented belief?

Some humans think in only pictures and some can't think in pictures at all (Aphantasia). How long has this been possible? How long ago did humans first have words in their minds?

Which creature invented seeing?

Which creature was the first to see well enough that it could go blind?

Which creature was the first to be able to think about being under the condition of blindness?

Do cats with three legs know that they have three legs? Is this knowledge in the form of "number of legs" or "difference from other cats" or "injury in the past?"

If crows have names for each other, and meerkats have names for birds of prey, do any animals have names for us?

If we sometimes believe that animals can't be evil because they can't go against their nature, do any animals believe this about us?

Who was the first to say "I love you" in whatever language was spoken first? Did they know what it meant?

What was the first metaphor? How do you develop the capacity for metaphor when you don't have it before? What happens inside you that makes you capable of understanding that something can be something else in a way that is different than being that thing?

How did we evolve artistic ability? Cruder forms of creation are less precise and more abstract. It's so much less of a leap to look at a bronze sculpture of a horse and say "horse," than to draw lines in dirt and say "horse." The lines in dirt aren't something that could be mistaken for a horse. The sensory experience of "horse" is big, beast, thundering hooves, hair, three dimensional, warm. The lines in dirt represent horse, without having much in common with horse. You can understand why a cave painting of a horse is "horse" without understanding symbols, but you have to somehow learn that you can represent things in two dimensions by using crude lines before you can create realistic art.

What colors did Precambrian organisms have?

If there was nothing that existed with color vision, did they have colors at all?

How many times has life started to evolve whatever it is that humans have, and turned back from that path?

Do blue whales know that they are the largest organism? Do they understand "largest?"

How large is an ant's concept of the world? Could a civilization of ant-sized creatures develop space travel? How much harder would it be for them to develop an understanding of the world that is that size?

It would be so much harder for a blue whale to develop space travel. Is there a size range for organisms that can do that?

If there is other life close by our Sun, how likely is it to ever develop interstellar travel? Would a single huge sapient fungus penetrating every ecosystem on its planet be interested in finding new planets, even if it was far more intelligent than us? Would sapient octopi? Is curiosity naturally part of intelligence? Is purposeless behavior naturally part of intelligence? How statistically likely is the ability to draw with a stick in the dirt and understand that you've made "horse?"

Would Earth 50,000 years ago be considered to have "intelligent life" by most standards? Would Earth 3,000 years ago? Was space travel inevitable? What if alien Sumer lasts for a million years? What if alien Sumer simply does not see anything else left to accomplish?

What if multicellular life is relatively rare? What if life on land that breathes air is relatively rare?

Why do so many creatures dream? Is it likely that aliens would understand what dreams are?

If aliens don't use sight, could we explain writing to them?

Is communication even possible between organisms that have totally different sensory worlds?

Would a sapient fungus that encompasses its entire planet in mycelium even be able to think of the idea of "communication?"

Would a sapient forest be able to think of the idea of "travel?"

Animals who have been taught some language have not been known to ask hypothetical questions. What creature invented questions?

#aliens #questions #creatures #life

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wornoutmouse · 3 years

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Yandere Tanjiro

Manipulation

Everytime I write salty sweet I think of peanut m&m's

Shout out to all my big areola having ass hoes. Pizza platter with the thick marshmallow tall nipples

You were so obvious and you didn't even realize it. Tanjiro doesn't blame you, many people forget how great his sense of smell was. So in the end he found it amusing when your scent would change to arousal and adoration whenever he was around you. In fact it entertained him

At first he thought it was misplaced, you couldn't feel such a thing towards him, that wasn't in your character. But all of his tests gave fruitful results. As he watched you from an unnoticeable distance He was able to confirm that no one ever made your scent change into any romantic auras. Not with Inosuke or Zenitsu. He even tried to see if you had feelings for Nezuko, she was always around him. But once again there was no change.

Even after finding out, he didn't care about this discovery. It wasn't the first time a woman or man alike has had an attraction to him. He knew he was handsome and everyone loves a kind soul. But your feelings weren't going to get him closer to his goal or keep you alive in the long run so he did not address it. That doesn't mean he didn't use it to his advantage though. On many occasions, he'd find himself teasing you subtly about your crush often.

Harmless grazes along your skin, being more extravagant when he fought with Inosuke. A few times he even waited around shirtless just to see you look away from him to hide your embarrassment. The sticky sharp smell that emanated from your body clung to your skin like a cologne. Tanjiro would even say that the smell gave him a bit of a high whenever it would fluctuate from the things he did.

Getting real close to you with a neutral face to make the arousal spark before committing a distracting act of kindness to make the soft smell of adoration and content swirl and mix into your aura. It was fun for him, almost like a game, and soon it became a routine way of life. After defeating a demon and the buzz of adrenaline dies down, you'd go right back to your bumbling self.

But then like everything Tanjiro has had in life, it is interrupted.

It happened right after you all just barely made it out of fighting the spider family. You and the others were relocated to the infirmary while Tanjiro was put on trial. He was already agitated when Sanemi pushed his filthy sword through Nezuko's flesh. So in an effort to calm himself, he decided that a little bit of teasing would help boost his mood.

When he finally ran across you again, you were lying in your own room resting. But not alone, one of the Hashira, Uzui Tengen sat by your side telling you stories of his battles and cracking jokes.

This would be fine normally, but the scent emanating from you was annoyingly familiar. You didn't even look at Tanjiro when he walked in and had a genuine look and scent of surprise when you noticed him. "Oh Kamado, what are you doing here?" Your scent still had its tinge of attraction but it had significantly lessened, not by much but enough to annoy him.

Tengen excused himself when he noticed his presence adding a head pat as he walked past the shorter male. For a moment Tanjiro lost focus and concern invaded your aura as you watched his face contort into one of disgust and unbridled rage.

Kamado, Since when did you call me that? Why are you giving your attention to a Hashira? What, am I not good enough for you anymore now that you found someone stronger.

Tanjiro never took you for the power-hungry type, you can't be. No that's not it, Tanjiro adjusts his face again to one of a content smile. "Are you okay?"

No, you weren't trying to abandon him on purpose. It's his fault partially, he doesn't blame you, his poor sweet naive Y/n. It's understandable that after ignoring your feelings for so long you'd try to move on and save yourself from the pain. But now it was okay, cause Tanjiro would fix it, he'd accept you, cause he was all you needed. "I'm okay, I broke my ankle and wrists." You raise said appendages to the best of your ability to show off your bandages.

For a second a dark thought crosses Tanjiro's mind. How weak you and flimsy you were, how easy it would be for one to take advantage of you at this moment. That's why you needed him to protect you. Someone so easy to break and seduce shouldn't be on their own. That's why Tanjiro would accept you, so you could stay close. For your own good.. All you had to give him was your attention and being.

Tanjiro sighed but for a different reason than you would ever know. If only he could put you in a box too.

B "Luckily I'm not as badly hurt like the rest of you." Tanjiro sat at your side and picked up your limp hands. "I don't know what I would have done if something were to happen to you." A small smile spreads across your face, "You would never lose us Tanjiro, Inosuke would definitely be hard to bring down."

The attempt to make a joke is invaded as Tanjiro cups your cheek. Rough battle-worn fingertips graze your lips. Tanjiro gazes at them as he speaks, his bottom lip worried by his teeth as his other hand ghosts over your bandaged wounds. It was a perfect performance. One that replicated the emotion of one who wants to make a move but holding themselves back. One that you effortlessly believed. "You don't understand, I don't want to lose you."

Tanjiro stands up and walks towards your door. Just before opening it, he turns with a doleful look on his face. "Rest up okay?" You nod quickly. Lips puckered into an O of surprise. Tanjiro closed the door, his demeanor doing a complete 180. His gaze was calculated and precise. Tanjiro had planted a seed of conflict, and all he had to do was wait till tomorrow to sow it.

You woke up bright and early the next day, wrists sore but thankfully no longer numb. Unthankfully, you were bedridden until your ankle has healed itself correctly. Sitting alone in the dark with nothing but your thoughts was a dreadful way to spend time. However, you didn't want to disturb your friends. "Their life does not revolve around me." Getting sleep was an inviting solution.

A light tap on your door shifts your goal ever so slightly. "Come in!" You try not to look deflated when only a Kakushi boy comes in with a pail of water and new bandage wraps.

Similarly, Tanjiro was helping around the state trending to his friends. Inosuke was being difficult as usual, only wanting the springer to fetch him water and tea to feed his sore throat. On multiple occasions, he had to dissuade Zenitsu from trying to propose to random Kakushi women that would help clean his wounds but in the end, it was futile as he returned his infatuation to Nezuko who wistfully stayed in their shared room asleep.

By the time Tanjiro got any time to himself, the evening sun was already setting and most had retired to their own rooms. Heading to your room, Tanjiro thought of ways to get you to succumb faster to his advances. The sound of a door opening made his gaze shift abruptly. His vibrant brown eyes dulled when he saw a Kakushi boy leaving your room again.

Entering your room was almost as if a joyous bomb had gone off. The smell of happiness was so strong it almost stinked. You didn't notice Tanjiro's soured mood as you observed your room. "He taught me how to make paper butterflies and put them on my ceilings, what do you think?!" He had indeed taught you Tanjiro mused as many of the butterflies had deformed wings of all sorts. "So what brings you here.?" Tanjiro looks back at you with a soft smile. "I just wanted the check-in on you, you must have been bored being cooped up in the room alone all day."

You shook your head, "No Kocho was here with me all day!" Tanjiro bit his tongue but maintained his smile, "Who's Kocho?" You laughed, "The Kakushi boy that just left. He had originally come just to change my wounds but then we got so interested in each other that he never left." With a blissful sigh, you tilt your head and murmur, "I hope he doesn't get into any trouble on the way back."

Tanjiro is on you in a second, wrists held haphazardly above your head drawing slight sharp pains to your inner elbow. "Tanjiro?" His eyes observe the dark bruises swirling underneath your bandages, your hair slightly matted and in disarray, since you were the only one who knew how to do it. "You're so soft…" Having no reason to leave your room you had remained only partially dressed as a large kimono hung around your figure. Your chest easily being exposed by unnatural movements. "T-Tanjiro?"

The boy hummed, leaning down to press a slow kiss on your brown nipple. "Say my name again.." You're taken aback by the sudden boldness and the warm feeling on your breast. "Tanjiro, what are you doing?!" He could feel himself becoming harder underneath his robe. Even though he said he was only indulging your crush to keep you near, he couldn't help but notice how sweet your skin tasted underneath his lips. "One more time, say it once again." Tanjiro begins to grind on the leg trapped in between his. He uses his other hand to cup your other boob before biting down on your nipple making you gasp. "Tanjiro!"

Your smell begins to become more lucid and tender at your arousal peaks through the haze. Your moans get airy and each time you say his name it turns more and more into gasps. Tanjiro squeezes down on your chest before traveling to your neck where his teeth sink into the flesh there. You ground yourself by holding onto his wrists.

Tanjiro peels himself away from you as you go pliant underneath him. ‘This wasn’t the plan.’ Tanjiro removes his robe from around his shoulders exposing his tan skin. He couldn’t focus past your addicting scent and you couldn’t focus past the feeling of his hands fondling your chest. The belt of your kimono is quickly unraveled, “Look at you.”

Tanjiro pulls your undergarments off exposing your body completely. Through the fabric of his robe he thrusts shallowly against your pussy. The fabric rubs against your clit on every thrust. Both sides of the robe are becoming damp. "I haven't even touched you yet and you're already so wet." The smell of sweat and sex floods Tanjiro's nostrils making him more sensitive.

He unwraps his robe the rest of the way, tossing it elsewhere to leave himself completely exposed. Tanjiro felt a sense of pride as he watched your eyes trail over his muscled form. He wasn't buff by any means, but his training in agility and swordsmanship made his body lean and bulked in his arms and legs. "Only look at me."

You let out a surprised gasp when delicately firm hands drag your body down by your calf. Tanjiro uses his fingers to push the skin of your pussy up to force your clit to peek through. His other hand holds the base of his cock and he swirls the tip around your clit. "Tanjiro please, I'm begging you!"

For a split second a look of unaltered disdain crosses his face before a more loving one takes over. "Your face is so cute, it almost makes me want to tease you more." Yes, that's it, play the part of a doting lover. You flinch the further his cock is pushed into you. Your bodies combine into a pulsating rhythm of jealousy and lust.

You squeeze snuggly around Tanjiro's and he sets a quick pace. Your legs try to curl to your chest but are stopped by Tanjiro's own body cornering you to the wood floor. Tanjiro steadies his breathing on every thrusts until his strokes are as smooth as the water he drinks. Slopping sounds and your pitiful cries equalize around the room.

Tanjiro knew these walls were thin, in fact he was betting on it. "Y-You're so loud Y/n." You close your mouth at the tease but it doesn't work. Just as you go to cover your mouth you're stopped by a hand and a loving smile, "Dont, I like hearing you feel good."

You cum, barely suppressing your sounds, hips twitching when Tanjiro cums inside right after you. An unnecessary act but one that could ensure even greater attachment if your body accepted him.

Expertly playing the role Tanjiro cleans you up with an ever content smile on his face, this time genuine. "You should get some sleep, you'll be more sore than you were this morning." Tanjiro puts his hand on the know before flinching when you call out to him. "Tanjiro?" He doesn't turn around unwilling to force another smile. "Yes?" He can smell your apprehension as it covers the smell of sex.

"I know its stupid to ask this but could you give me another kiss?" Tanjiro sighs silently, "Of course!" He forces his persona for the last time tonight and heads towards your bed. Halfway there he stops.

"Promise me you'll only look at me from now on." You smile giddily, "You're so weird Tanjiro of course I'll only love you." Tanjiro frowns and you fail to notice the space between the two of you growing smaller. "No, that's not good enough. I don't want to see you near that damn Hashira again." And then it happens. It only takes a split second before Tanjiro's face is in front of yours and the cold kiss of his blade presses against your neck.

"You wouldn't want something to happen would you?" You shake your head as he knew you would, "Good girl." Tanjiro has no care for the shocked tears gathering behind your lashes. Greedily he cups the back of your head and forces you into a kiss. All teeth pure spite as he swaps saliva with you.

"There's your kiss." Without having to pretend any longer he drops his smile. The sinister complex of a perceived hero shining through dark eyes. He looks you up and down once again, fingers tapping along his blackened blade before taking his leave.

#black y/n #blackreader #demon slayer #tanjiro smut #demon slayer smut #anime smut #smut

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nikki152006 · 3 years

Text

Movie Night Heartbreak - Kaminari X Reader

We're having a movie night!" Kaminari sang out to you, making you laugh at your boyfriend. You and Kaminari had been dating for three months now, and were in a happy relationship, backed up by the whole Bakusquad, even Bakugou.

"Okay, what are we watching!" you asked the other members of the Bakusquad.

"Romantic movie?" Kaminari and Sero asked together. The rest of you said, "Naaaaah.", much to their sorrow.

"Action movie!" Kirishima and Mina suggested. You and Bakugou shared a glance and smiled evilly.

"A horror movie!" you and Bakugou cried out loud. "And the one who doesn't like the idea is literally trying to challenge me!" he said, activating small sparks on his hands.

"(NAME)! You traitor!" Kaminari shouted while you all laughed at his already scared figure.

"Okay, today night, 11pm, get all the popcorn and stuff, leave convincing Mr. Aizawa to me and Bakugou." you said and walked out, along with Bakugou. Being the third topper in class, with Bakugou as second, it was never too hard for you two to convince Mr. Aizawa.

_____________________________________________________________

"OKAY!" Mina shouted. "Here's the popcorn!" she said, handing out everyone a bowl each. You all sat cuddled up in Bakugou's room, you next to Kaminari on one side and Mina on the other. The movie started.

It was scary. Even Bakugou yelped a few times during jump-scares and stuff. Kaminari, on the other hand, was hold you tight, you doing the same, affectionately.

"Damn, (Name)." he whispered. "If it was a romantic movie, we could have been making out right now."

You giggled and pecked his cheek. "My little baby Pikachu." you said, "A horror movie is more of a romantic one. Don't you see what position you are in?" He looked up at you and looked at his body, finding his face in your chest, hands around your waist and legs around yours. He blushed wildly and loosened his grip due to embarrassment. You gripped him harder and he blushed even more.

There was a knock on the door and an annoyed Bakugou paused the movie and checked out who it was.

"HAH!? EARS! WHAT DO YOU WANT!?" he shouted. The rest of your drifted your eyes to the door.

"That's Jirou, isn't it." Mina asked. You agreed with a "Hmmm."

"Why is she here though?" Kaminari asked, "Did anyone of you invite her?"

"No, Denki, it's just a Bakusquad here." you said, remembering no mention of anyone else joining you.

"Dunce-face!" Bakugou called out, "She's got talk to you so shit out!"

"Huh, me?" Kaminari asked, confused. You looked at him with raised eyebrows, "Did you do something naughty?"

"No, plus I don't understand why it's her and not Iida if I did do something wrong." he said, getting up and leaving.

Bakugou came back and sat on Kaminari's spot. You looked at him and he had a weird expression on his face.

"Anything wrong?" you asked him. He nodded. Sero, Mina and Kirishima also quietened down to listen.

"I've got this feeling that Ears would try seducing him or something." Bakugou said, making you all laugh. He growled at you all and told you all to "Shut up.."

"Jirou isn't like that." you said, "Plus I think she's crushing on you." At this information, all of the Bakusquad members let out a "Huh?" while Bakugou made a disgusted face.

"Really?" Kirishima asked, smiling widely. "Yeah." you said, "I mean, we're almost like friends and she keeps on saying things like -" you used your fingers as quotes quoting Jirou - "*Bakugou's muscular arms are way better than Kaminari's* ..then also, *Bakugou is hotter than Kaminari* and *I'm so jealous Bakugou likes you so much* and shit like that."

"You're an idiot." Bakugou said with wide eyes.

"I-I think I'll agree." Kirishima said. You turned to him in confusion.

"What?" you whined.

"(Name).." Mina said, "she's literally making you try to notice Bakugou more than Kaminari, and trying to get your mind off of him. No wonder she was acting so weird with us all week long."

"I-...but..." you muttered in shock.

"Woah, Bakubro! You figured quick." Kirishima said, at which Bakugou nodded and turned to you.

"Right now." he gruffed, "Let's focus on what she says to or does with dunce face." You all nodded and walked towards the door. Just as you began opening it, Kaminari slammed it open.

"Woah." you all said in unison.

"Are we not watching the movie anymore?" Kaminari asked. You all said, "We were about to check on you." again in unison and plopped back on the bed, as Kaminari shut the door and made his way upto the bed.

"Was anything wrong?" you asked, ruffling his hair as he sat beside you. He shook his head in denial and asked you all to play the movie. You all exchanged glances, knowing Kaminari would've done anything to avoid the movie. Bakugou played the movie and you both exchanged worried glances.

Almost half an hour had passed but Kaminari was just sitting straight, and not in your lap as usual. A sudden panic overtook you, as you remembered what your three friends had said while he was away.

You pulled Kaminari into your lap and hugged him. "Let me enjoy my romantic movie, Denki." you whispered into his ear. He looked up at you and flashed a smile before nuzzling into you.

He slept there.

The movie ended and Bakugou growled as he got the sleeping Mina and Kirishima off him. You chuckled at him.

"Need help?" you said, softly placing Kaminari on the side and walking over to help a struggling Bakugou.

----

"Mmm? (Name)?" Kaminari called out. He opened his eyes slowly and rubbed them while getting up. He glanced around. (Name) was getting Kirishima off Bakugou as Bakugou was pushing Mina off. They both giggled. A sudden ache spread across Kaminari's chest as he observed both of them, giggling and drawing on Mina and Kirishima's sleeping faces. Jirou's words danced across his brain.

"It was true?" he mumbled, as his voice was mumbled by the giggles.

"N-No..." he said, as his eyes widened.

"I-I...Jirou was right...She...She was...I-I think...I think I should do as she said." he mumbled.

----

"Bakugou, gimme the marker." you mumbled, examining the scribbles on Mina's face, "I forgot to draw around her eyes."

Bakugou, who had successfully finished Kirishima, gave you the marker and you drew circles around Mina's eyes.

"Now dunce face." Bakugou said.

"Leave him out of this." you said, not looking at him.

"Oh." Bakugou said, giggling, as he got up and walked to get some water, while raising his voice slightly so that you could hear, "You love dunce face too much?"

"Ugh..." you groaned, "Look, it's not about that, but I don't want him to wake up and find out that he's- "

Bakugou cut you off, saying, "(Name)'s so in love with dunce face that she's forgetting that I exist."

You stared at him. "Don't you dare!" you snarled. Bakugou merely chuckled, took out another marker and walked towards his bed.

"Bakugou! I'll make that picture of you sleeping I have go viral if you dare to." you snapped.

"Oh, I wonder when you both have been sleeping together." Kaminari's bitter voice drew both of your attention.

"Huh?" you said, confused. "We haven't." Bakugou said to him, blandly.

"Sure." Kaminari said, as his words were drenched in sarcasm and bitterness.

"Wh-What's wrong? Denki, are you alright?" you asked, getting up and walking towards him.

"Stay back." he spat at you. You felt a sharp pang in your heart.

"Looks like Ears has got him." Bakugou said, "Listen, dunce face-"

Kaminari cut him off, saying, "NO Bakugou! You don't get to say anything when you break MY relationship!"

"Wha- Denki, listen, that's not true!" you tried to say, "Bakugou isn't coming in anywhere, in fact he warned me that Jirou would try to break us apar-"

"NO (NAME)! ENOUGH! THAT IS JUST ENOUGH!"

"Hey.." Kirishima, who had woken up by the noise said groggily, "(Name) is right, Jirou has been acting weird all this time."

"Yeah.." Mina said, "She even tried to make (Name)-" but again, Kaminari cut them off,

"AND WHY SHOULD I BELIEVE ANYTHING YOU SAY! HUH? AFTER ALL! YOU ARE BAKUGOU AND (NAME)'S LAPDOGS!"

That hurt them and they shut up, staring at Kaminari, who was tearing up. Everyone there knew he was hurt and didn't blame him for what he said but everything he did say hurt alot.

"Denki..please atleast listen." you croaked out as tears rolled out of your eyes.

"No." he said, wiping his tears. "I think Jirou is way more good to be a girlfriend than you are. I'm breaking up with you right now. Enjoy Bakugou, bitch."

He stomped out of the room, shutting the door behind him. Tears fell from your eyes as you stared at the doors with a pained expression.

"I-I'm.." Bakugou whispered out, "I'm really sorry, I should've...not...hung around you so much." His voice was pained and you knew why. Kirishima and Bakugou were like your brothers. You cried as you sunk onto the ground. There was a long awkward silence, only filled with your sobs and the other three's sniffs.

After some time, they three, along with Sero walked upto you and sat beside you, and stayed there until you all fell asleep.

_____________________________________________________________

"(Name)?" Uraraka called put to you, the next morning. You had just showered and walked down to the common room. Al most everyone was gathered there and they all wore worried looks.

"Yea?" you groaned, rubbing your already puffy eyes.

"Uh, last night." Uraraka said.

"Don't." you groaned as you eyes Jirou with a viscous look.

"I'm sorry I'm late!" Kaminari said, bringing two bowls of ice cream and plopping beside Jirou and handing her one. He eyes drifted to you for a second, then drifted off.

Kirishima and Mina came in, and Bakugou, who was sitting beside Midoriya, Sero, Momo and Todoroki, got up and the boys followed.

"Everyone!" Momo called out, "It pains me to say this but it will be unfair if I don't."

Everyone drifted their eyes to Momo. Bakugou shot you a reassuring glance.

"Yesterday night, the commotion we all witnessed, was caused due to Kaminari breaking up with (Name)! We all know that, don't we?" Everyone nodded and murmured a yes. Kaminari looked around, confused, and Jirou looked surprised and shocked.

"Well! I want to tell you all!" Momo announced, as her expressions faltered, "That Jirou, my best friend had told me during breakfast yesterday that the break up was due that night."

"Yeah, I heard too." Hagakure added. "Mee too." Tokoyami said and some other students murmured a yes.

"Also, Jirou, from the last one month has been trying to get (Name) to notice Bakugou, and think about him romantically."

"Wait." Kaminari said, "What shit?"

"Yes, Kaminari, " Momo said, sadly, "Jirou has been trying to make (Name) interested in Bakugou but (Name) thought she crushed on him instead."

"Ohh!" Uraraka cried, "And also, yesterday, Jirou said something like - That bitch (Name) will pay for having Kaminari!"

"Yeah!" Momo said, "Kaminari, Bakugou just told me what happened last night, but the truth is, Jirou has always been jealous of your and (Name)'s relationship and so, she set it all up!"

"(Name) is like a shitty sister to me." Bakugou gruffed.

You subconsciously threw a pillow at him and looked at Kaminari, who looked petrified and shocked. He turned to Jirou who was shaking in shock and was gritting her teeth.

"Is-Is that true?"Kaminari asked, facing you. You stared at him, blankly.

"You know." you said in a soft voice, "You don't need to consider it true if any freaking girl can come over and make you trust her more than any of Bakugou, me or our 'lapdogs.' "

Kaminari's eyes widened.

"I-.." he tried to say, and everyone looked at you, hopefully.

"Yeah yeah.." you sighed out, "Just trust me more." Kaminari's eyes brightened as he jumped over to hug you and you hugged him back.

"NO!" Jirou shouted. "STAY AWAY FROM HIM!"

Shinsou used his scarves to capture her and then handed the scarves to Bakugou, saying, "Here's the leash to the bitch."

Kaminari squeezed you in his arms, muttering apologies continuously, and calling himself a dork for questioning your loyalty. He kissed you quickly at which the girls exclaimed an "Aww" while Bakugou and Shinsou let out "Eww."s

Kaminari asked you to give him a moment to talk privately and you both walked over to his room.

Kaminari dropped on his knees and began begging you to forget what he did and continue like there was nothing wrong that night. You sighed as you dropped on your knees.

"My heart broke." you said, making him look down in regret, "But I know yours did too and that is why you acted like that." He looked up, with a small smile.

"It's okay." you said, hugging him and pulling in to his his lips.

"Now," you said, after you both pulled away, "It's best you apologize to our lapdogs too."

"I love you, (Name)." he whispered into your ear.

"I love you too, dork." you said, kissing his forehead as you both walked out, giggling at Jirou's annoyed screams as she tried to escape Shinsou's scarves.

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soundsfaebutokay · 3 years

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youtube

So I've recc'd this video before, but it deserves its own post because it's one of my favorite things on youtube. It's a Tedx Talk by comics writer, editor, and journalist Jay Edidin, and I really think that it will connect with a lot of people here.

If you live and breathe stories of all kinds, you might like this.

If you care about media representation, you might like this.

If you're neurodivergent, you might like this.

If you're interested in a gender transition story that veers from the norm, you might like this.

If you love the original Leverage and especially Parker, and understand how important it is that a character like her exists, you will definitely like this.

Transcript below the cut:

You Are Here: The Cartography of Stories

by Jay Edidin

I am autistic. And what this means in practice is that there are some things that are easier for me than they are for most people, and a great many things that are somewhat harder, and these affect my life in more or less overt ways. As it goes, I'm pretty lucky. I've been able to build a career around special interests and granular obsession. My main gig at the moment is explaining superhero comics continuity and publishing history for which work I am somehow paid in actual legal currency—which is both a triumph of the frivolous in an era of the frantically pragmatic, and a job that's really singularly suited to my strengths and also to my idiosyncrasies.

I like comics. I like stories in general, because they make sense to me in ways that the rest of the world and my own mind often don't. Self-knowledge is not an intuitive thing for me. What sense of self I have, I've built gradually and laboriously and mostly through long-term pattern recognition. For decades, I didn't even really have a self-image. If you'd asked me to draw myself, I would eventually have given you a pair of glasses and maybe a very messy scribble of hair, and that would've been about it. But what I do know—backwards, forwards, and in pretty much every way that matters—are stories. I know how they work. I understand their language, their complex inner clockwork, and I can use those things to extrapolate a sort of external compass that picks up where my internal one falls short. Stories—their forms, their structure, the sense of order inherent to them—give me the means to navigate what otherwise, at least for me, would be an impassable storm of unparsable data. Or stories are a periscope, angled to access the parts of myself I can't intuitively see. Or stories are a series of mirrors by which I can assemble a composite sketch of an identity I rarely recognize whole...which is how I worked out that I was transgender, in my early thirties, by way of a television show.

This is my story. And it's about narrative cartography, and representation, and why those things matter. It's about autism and it's about gender and it's about how they intersect. And it's about the kinds of people we know how to see, and the kinds of people we don't. It's not the kind of story that gets told a lot, you might hear a lot, because the narrative around gender transition and dysphoria in our culture is really, really prescriptive. It's basically the story of the kid who has known for their whole life that they're this and not that, and that story demands the kind of intuitive self-knowledge that I can't really do, and a kind of relationship to gender that I don't really have—which is part of why it took me so long to figure my own stuff out.

So, to what extent this story, my story has a beginning, it begins early in 2014 when I published an essay titled, "I See Your Value Now: Asperger's and the Art of Allegory." And it explored, among other things, the ways that I use narrative and narrative structures to navigate real life. And it got picked up in a number of fairly prominent places that got linked, and I casually followed the ensuing discussion. And I was surprised to discover that readers were fairly consistently assuming I was a man. Now, that in itself wasn't a new experience for me, even though at the time I was writing under a very unambiguously female byline. It had happened in the letter columns of comics I'd edited. It had happened when a parody Twitter account I'd created went viral. When I was on staff at Wired, I budgeted for fancy scotch by putting a dollar in a box every time a reader responded in a way that made it clear they were assuming I was a man in response to an article where my name was clearly visible, and then I had to stop doing that because it happened so often I couldn't afford to keep it up. But in all of those cases, the context, you know, the reasons were pretty obvious. The fields I'd worked in, the beats I covered, they were places where women had had to fight disproportionally hard for visibility and recognition. We live in a culture that assumes a male default, so given a neutral voice and a character limit, most readers will assume a male author.

But this was different, because this wasn't just a book I'd edited, it wasn't a story I'd reported—it was me, it was my story. And it made me uncomfortable, got under my skin in ways that the other stuff really hadn't. And so I did what I do when that happens, and I tried to sort of reverse-engineer it to look at the conclusions and peel them back to see the narratives behind them and the stories that made them tick. And I started this, I started this by going back to the text of the essay, and you know, examining it every way I could think of: looking at craft, looking at content. And in doing so, I was surprised to realize that while I had written about a number of characters with whom I identified closely, that every single one of those characters I'd written about was male. And that surprised me even more than the responses to the essay had, because I've spent my career writing and talking and thinking about gender and representation in popular media. In 2014, I'd been the feminist gadfly of an editorial department and multiple mastheads. I'd been a founding board member of an organization that existed to advocate for more and better representation of women and girls in comics characters and creators. And most of my favorite characters, the ones I'd actively seek out and follow, were women. Just not, apparently, the characters I saw myself in.

Now I still didn't realize it was me at this point. Remember: self-knowledge, not very intuitive for me. And while I had spent a lot of time thinking about gender, I'd never really bothered to think much about my own. I knew academically that the way other people read and interpreted my gender affected and had influenced a lifetime of social and professional interactions, and that those in turn had informed the person I'd grown up into during that time. But I really believed, like I just sort of had in the back of my head, that if you peeled away all of that social conditioning, you'd basically end up with what I got when I tried to draw a self-portrait. So: a pair of glasses, messy scribble of hair, and in this case, maybe also some very strong opinions about the X-Men. I mean, I knew something was off. I'd always known something was off, that my relationship to gender was messy and uncomfortable, but gender itself struck me as messy and uncomfortable, and it had never been a large enough part of how I defined myself to really feel like something that merited further study, and I had deadlines, and...so it was always on the back burner. So, I looked, I looked at what I had, at this improbable group of exclusively male characters. And I looked and I figured that if this wasn't me, then it had to be a result of the stories I had access to, to choose from, and the entertainment landscape I was looking at. And the funny thing is, I wasn't wrong, exactly. I just wasn't right either.

See, the characters I'd written about had one other significant trait in common aside from their gender, which is that they were all more or less explicitly, more or less heavily coded as autistic. And I thought, "Ah, yes. This explains it. This is under representation in fiction echoing under representation in life and vice versa." Because the characteristics that I'd honed in on, that I particularly identified with in these guys, were things like emotional unavailability and social awkwardness and granular obsession, and all of those are characteristics that are seen as unsympathetic and therefore unmarketable in female characters. Which is also why readers were assuming that I was a man.

Because, you see, here's the thing. I'm not the only one who uses stories to navigate the world. I'm just a little more deliberate about it. For humans, stories formed the bridge between data and understanding. They're where we look when we need to contextualize something new, or to recognize something we're pretty sure we've seen before. They're how we identify ourselves; they're how we locate ourselves and each other in the larger world. There were no fictional women like me; there weren't representations of women like me in media, and so readers were primed not to recognize women like me in real life either.

Now by this point, I had started writing a follow-up essay, and this one was also about autism and narratives, but specifically focused on how they intersected with gender and representation in media. And in context of this essay, I went about looking to see if I could find even one female character who had that cluster of traits I'd been looking for, and I was asking around in autistic communities. And I got a few more or less useful one-off suggestions, and some really, really splendid arguments about semantics and standards, and um...then I got one answer over and over and over in community after community after community. "Leverage," people told me. "You have to watch Leverage."

So I watched Leverage. Leverage is five seasons of ensemble heist drama. It's about a team of very skilled con artists who take down corrupt and powerful plutocrats and the like, and it's a lot of fun, and it's very clever, and it's clever enough that it doesn't really matter that it's pretty formulaic, and I enjoyed it a lot. But what's most important, what Leverage has is Parker.

Parker is a master thief, and she is the best of the best of the best in ways that all of Leverage's characters are the best of the best. And superficially, she looks like the kind of woman you see on TV. So she's young, and she's slender, and she's blonde, and she's attractive but in a sort of approachable way. And all of that familiarity is brilliant misdirection, because the thing is, there are no other women like Parker on TV. Because Parker—even if it's never explicitly stated in the show—Parker is coded incredibly clearly as autistic. Parker is socially awkward. Her speech tends to have limited inflection; what inflection it does have is repetitive and sounds rehearsed a lot of the time. She's not emotionally literate; she struggles with it, and the social skills she develops over the series, she learns by rote, like they're just another grift. When she's not scaling skyscrapers or cartwheeling through laser grids, she wears her body like an ill-fitting suit. Parker moves like me. And Parker, Parker was a revelation—she was a revolution unto herself. In a media landscape where unempathetic women usually exist to either be punished or "loved whole," Parker got to play the crabby savant. And she wasn't emotionally intuitive but it was never ever played as the product of abuse or trauma even though she had survived both of those—it was just part of her, as much as were her hands or her eyes. And she had a genuine character arc. My god, she had a genuine romantic arc, even. And none of that required her to turn into anything other than what she was. And in Parker I recognized a thousand tics and details of my life and my personality...but. I didn't recognize myself.

Why? What difference was there in Parker, you know, between Parker and the other characters I'd written about? Those characters, they'd spanned ethnicities and backgrounds and different media and appearances and the only other characteristic they all had in common was their gender. So that was where I started to look next, and I thought, "Well, okay, maybe, maybe it's masculinity. Maybe if Parker were less feminine, she'd click with me the way those other characters had." So then I tried to imagine a Parker with short hair, who's explicitly butch, and...nothing. So okay, I extended it in what seems like the only logical direction to extend it. I said, "Well, if it's not masculinity, what if it's actual maleness? What if Parker were a man?" Ah. Yeah.

In the end, everything changed, and nothing changed, which is often the way that it goes for me. Add a landmark, no matter how slight, and the map is irrevocably altered. Add a landmark, and paths that were invisible before open wide. Add a landmark, and you may not have moved, but suddenly you know where you are and where you can go.

I wasn't going to tell this story when I started planning this talk. I was gonna tell a similar story, it was about stories, like this is, about narratives and the ways that they influence our culture and vice versa. And it centered around a group of women at NASA who had basically rewritten the narrative around space exploration, and it was a lot more fun, and I still think it was more interesting. But it's also a story you can probably work out for yourselves. In fact it's a story some of you probably have, if you follow that kind of thing, which you probably do given that you're here. And this is a story, my story is not a story that I like to tell. It's not a fun story to talk about because it's very personal and I am a very private person. And it's not universal. And it's not always relatable, and it's definitely not aspirational. And it's not the kind of story that you tend to encounter unless you're already part of it...which is why I'm telling it now. Because the thing is, I'm not the only person who uses stories to parse the world and navigate it. I'm just a little more deliberate. Because I'm tired of having to rely on composite sketches.

Open your maps. Add a landmark. Reroute accordingly.

#Jay Edidin #LGBTQ #autism #mind and body #gender norms #why humans need stories #Leverage #Parker #Abby posts Leverage #my faves #Youtube #I did my best with the transcript #sorry for any mistakes

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sofreddie · 3 years

Text

Scent From Above 5

Summary: Jensen finally gets what he wants.

Characters: Alpha!Jensen x Omega!Fan Reader

ABO BINGO: Marking

Warnings: A/B/O Dynamics, Heat, Smut (Unprotected Sex, Mating, Knotting, Claiming/Marking, Breeding Kink), Dirty Talk

Word Count: 1,633

A/N: So this was only supposed to be five parts. But uh…there ended up being a double-dosing of smut (you're welcome). It also allowed me to squeeze in another @spnabobingo square - Marking - which, duh 🙄, why didn't I think of that before?! Anyway, so there will now be one additional part which will finish up the whole story.

PART 4

"Yours, Alpha," she breathed out, holding his gaze, letting him know she was ready, her skin electrified from his touch, her core throbbing for his attention.

"Yours," he responded, before diving in for an all-consuming kiss.

He guided her back until her calves hit the bed and she plopped down in a seated position. She looked up at him, stood before her in all his glory before her eyes traveled to the engorged cock that stood erect before her. She subconsciously licked her lips. Jensen chuckled as he wrapped one hand tightly around the base.

"You wanna suck my cock, pretty Omega?" he chuckled darkly, brushing the hair tenderly out of her face before tangling his fingers in the hair at the back of her head, "Open up," he commanded as he brought the tip to her lips.

She willingly obeyed, letting her Omega instincts take charge and placing her trust in Jensen. She opened her mouth and he slowly fed her his length until he was hitting the back of her throat. She hummed happily, hollowing her cheeks. He groaned, his hand tightening in her hair as he began pumping his hips along with her bobbing.

He was so wound up, and she was so fucking eager. He was so close to coming. He pulled her off of him with a pop and she immediately pouted.

"I wanted your cum," she whined.

"You'll get it," he promised, moving her up the bed to lay on the pillows. He kissed up her thighs, his hands framing her mound, "Gonna fill this sweet, little pussy, Omega," he took a deep breath of her scent and she blushed, enthralled and slightly embarrassed, "Claim you inside and out."

His tongue peeked out to taste her and she lost all coherent thought. He swirled his tongue around her nub, before flicking over it just once. He dragged his tongue down through her folds with a groan before diving deep inside her. He twisted his tongue, feeling her walls and tasting her slick. It was like her scent but concentrated. With fingers and tongue and unmatched enthusiasm, Jensen quickly brought her over the edge, wringing every bit of pleasure he could from her body as she thrashed and moaned.

While she caught her breath he crawled up her body, leaving warm, wet kisses in his wake and readorning her with his hickeys and love bites. When he reached her neck he settled his body against hers with a sigh.

He breathed deeply of her again. He dreamt of her scent. He clung to her shirt, desperately trying to wring every bit of scent he could from it. He nearly found himself in tears as its loss, affecting him in ways he'd never imagined.

He pulled back and focused his eyes on hers. She smiled warmly at him, her hands caressing him, her fingertips dipping into curves and lines with a worshipful touch.

He shifted his hips, dragging his cock along her folds before catching at her entrance. He locked eyes with her once more, cupping her face as he slowly slid home. Her mouth hung open in a silent gasp as he filled her.

She missed the feel of him inside her. She had played their weekend together over and over again in her mind. But her memories had let her down because he felt even more incredible than before, she was sure of it.

"So good," he moaned, gently kissing her neck where his hickey once lay. His favorite spot. His chosen spot, since that first night. He moved slow, their eyes locked as they simply felt and reconnected.

He wanted to take his time, to draw out every moment of their coupling. But she was still weak, her body desperate. He wanted to be a good Alpha and take care of her. She whined, clinging to him, needing more.

"I got you, Baby," he pecked her lips, turning her to her stomach and lifting her hips. She quickly and eagerly moved into presentation. He groaned at the sight, before hearing her whimper once more. The same heartbreaking sound she had made when he found her on the floor.

"I got you, Omega," he soothed her again as he took up his place behind her. He wrapped his arms around her, kissing her spine, before adjusting his hips and sliding home in one, smooth stroke.

She submitted to him completely and the Alpha rewarded her with the harsh and dominating pace her body craved. His eyes rolled into the back of his head, his hands planted firmly on her hips, keeping her in place and giving him leverage.

He groaned as he looked down where they connected, seeing his shaft glistening from her slick. Her pussy clutched at him hungrily, sucking him in deeper on every thrust.

"Jay, please," she begged, almost sobbing, "Please, want your knot, want your claim."

He snarled and fucker her harder, "What was that Omega?"

"Alpha!" she corrected herself, so close to the edge, "Alpha please."

Jensen brushed her hair away from her neck, licking over his chosen spot.

"Gonna claim you," he gave a final warning, "Gonna breed you Omega."

She gasped and moaned as her climax crashed over her, his words as impactful as his brutal mating. As her walls clenched tight around his throbbing shaft, he bit hard into her neck. His knot swelled rapidly, locking them tightly together as his cum flooded her womb.

He bit down harder, his hips still erratically thrusting as he rode out the waves. He was lightheaded and swimming with euphoria as he finally fulfilled the bond his body was craving.

They both slumped forward onto the bed, Jensen's body covering hers like a blanket, but she clearly didn't mind. She was practically purring beneath him as he carefully cleaned his mark, lapping at the wounds. He was attentive, careful, and thorough.

By the time he was satisfied with his work, she had fallen asleep. He chuckled, before rolling them on their sides. His knot tugged slightly as he spooned her. He breathed deeply of her once more, already finding notes of her scent changing, adapting to include his claim, his essence.

He knew she'd need him again, and soon. But with their coupling complete, she was safe. She was his.

Jensen smiled at Y/N as he finished washing the dishes. When she woke, Jensen made her shower and now was making her eat and hydrate. She whined cutely. But he knew there was more to taking care of her than just fucking her through her heat.

He was determined to show her that he was a good Alpha. That he meant his claim and stood by their bond. That he wanted her completely. He had been anxiously thinking about it since he woke.

"I want you to claim me too," he said once she was finished.

Her eyes went wide as she processed.

"What?"

"I want you to know that I'm yours as much as you are mine," he explained, pulling her into his arms, "Whenever you have doubts, I want you to see your mark and know that it's real and I'm yours."

"B-but…most Alphas don't-"

"I'm not most Alphas," he stated firmly, kissing her possessively. She melted into him and he scooped her into his arms, her legs wrapping around his waist. He carried her to the couch and sat down with her in his lap.

"This is familiar," she chuckled, blushing profusely.

"Should have claimed you then," he breathed out, dragging his nose along her hairline as he breathed her in, "Then we never would've been apart. Your heat never would've got so bad," his voice shook as he remembered how scared he was.

She cupped his face in her hands, her eyes studying his own before she kissed him tenderly. She held his gaze as she slipped his cock from his boxer briefs. Using her other hand, she slid her panties to the side before sinking down on his length.

"Y/N," he moaned as his hands clutched her sides. His head rolled to lay against the back of the couch as he adjusted his hips, "You take charge," he told her with a smirk, submitting to her will. He needed her to understand they were partners, equals, mates.

He never failed to empower her. To make her feel greater than she did before, sexier, more confident. She couldn't believe her luck in having Jensen as an Alpha. She was quickly becoming addicted to the way he looked at her with stars and adoration in his eyes. It was the same way she looked at him.

It didn't take long for them to climb to that high together once more, their bodies quickly learning each other and adapting. Her eyes locked onto his exposed neck, his words from earlier echoing in her ears in time with the pumping of her blood.

Her eyes flashed to his, barely open slits as he succumbed to the pleasure. He nodded at her, tilting his head a little more and using his other hand to gently guide her by the back of the head, encouraging her mark.

She kissed the skin reverently before parting her lips, biting down and breaking into the skin as they both fell over the edge. Jensen hissed, his hips stuttering and knot popping before he gave into his own urges, renewing his claim.

"Does it hurt?" Y/N asked after they cleaned the marks. Her eyes were glued to her claim.

"No," he promised, pecking her lips and pulling her flush against him as they waited for his knot to go down. He'd wear her mark proudly. It wasn't conventional, but he didn't care in the slightest what anyone might think. She was his, and he was hers.

PART 6 (Final)

Forevers:

@sis-tafics

@lyarr24

@calaofnoldor

@hobby27

@spnbaby-67

@fangirlxwritesx67

RPF:

@smoothdogsgirl

JENSEN TAGS:

@akshi8278

@jerkbitchidjitassbutt

@slamminmine

@deanjensenficsandart

@woodworthti666

@charred-angelwings

@deandreamernp

@laycblack

#spnabobingo #scent from above #part 5 #alpha!jensen x omega!reader #jensen x reader #a/b/o dynamics #smut

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paimon-rambles · 3 years

Text

Alphabet Fluff

Characters: Aether

A gift to my sister cause she never stops thirsting 😒 @katsukiibug

Doing all of them ;-;

Icon credit: Leheia

A ctivities - What do they like to do with their s/o? How do they spend their free time with them?

Aether is opened to any activities his partner throws at him. He's not very picky.

But he does enjoy some dinner dates and strolls around the city, wheater it is Liyue or Mondstadt. He pays for all meals and snacks with the Mora he got from his travels.

Be warned, however, cause Paimon ain't gonna shut up about the food. Regardless it's comforting, followed by a nice walk through the city basked in moonlight.

Aether also in general likes to travel with you, other than Paimon you're his companion. He likes to take you to the forest to pick berries or other essential resources, beneficial for future endeavors.

Stories from his travels? Aether could ramble about for hours. Describing the little mishaps and mischief he and his sister found themselves in. Though he gets really sad whenever his sister is brought up.....oofles

He's traveled from world to world was introduced to many hobbies and games of variety, he's happy to introduce you to some of them if your willing to try something new out.

B eauty - What do they admire about their s/o? What do they think is beautiful about them?

Your patience

Aether has a bit of a packed schedule; assisting with commissions and dealing with hilichrul attacks. Not to mention his mind is set on finding the 7 archons in the hope to find his sister. He's incredibly busy most of the times

He doesn't ignore you on purpose, but he's dragged everywhere. Poor guy:(

But he admires that you don't fuss about it and always hold patience. Of course, Aether will find a way to make it up to you eventually. He tends to send small souvenirs from his travels as a form of apology.

Your comfort

He recently lost his sister and is overhwaled by all these tasks placed on his heavy and tired shoulders. He leans on you when he needs that moment of peace or comfort.

He loves that you try to soothe him whenever he's in his worst moments. With your words or simple touches of comfort, he adores it all.

Your eyes

Aether loves to stare into your eyes. He finds them really beautiful and finds himself smiling whenever looking in your eyes.

He's memorized by how they lightly sparkle or glimmer depending on your emotions. Or how they light up whenever you laugh or smile.

He finds it soothing to just lean your foreheads against each other and stare endlessly at your eyes, his worries and concerns being carried away.

C omfort - How would they help their s/o when they feel down/have a panic attack etc.?

He's a brother and understands when his partner is under stress or feeling down. Similar to how he notices the small gestures Lumine has that show her emotions are swirling in her head.

He picks up on the small hints and notices right away the shift in your behavior. You can say you're fine but he ain't falling for it, he's seen the signs.

But Aether does give the space you want. He recognizes its benefits and understands it himself; He's lost his kin, there are times Aether wants to push everyone away.

So patient, he's not pushing you into anything instead he's letting you describe what's bothering you at your pace. You can break down sobbing and he would wait while comfortably drawing stars on your back. He even has his shoulder to cry on if you want, softly running his hand through her hair in comforting motions.

He tries his best to give advice from his own experience. He makes a promise to cheer you later. He's just trying to make you happy again cause he hurting inside if you're not :(

D reams - How do they picture their future with their s/o?

Aether pictures the future from time to time. Mainly thinking about finding his sibling. He pictures two outcomes the good now and the one he dreads dearly.

Of course, since you are his s/o, you do play role in some of the scenarios he plays on his head.

He wonders what will be of the relationship after he finds his sibling, would they continue to travel worlds as they had done previously?

It was his sister and himself life's work of jumping planet to planet and learning of the different kingdoms and such.

Teyvat is your home, you have all your plans for the future in this world, he couldn't force you to leave.

So he rather hears of your views on the future instead, listening closely as you explain everything you have planned while his heart slowly aches as he debates for his future.

E qual - Are they the dominant one in the relationship, or rather passive?

He sees you as his equal. Nothing less or more- though he looks to up you a lot

He doesn't let any status you may hold hinder the relationship, and he wishes the same. He may be a traveler from another world, praised for his achievements, and his reputation in the nation's placed his name high. But Aether doesn't want that to affect his relationship with his lover.

So yee equals =

F ight - Would they be easy to forgive their s/o? How are they fighting?

He hates fighting :(

Soft boy can't handle arguing with his s/o. It breaks his heart every time. Instantly feels guilty, even if he wasn't in the wrong.

Because of this arguments are incredibly rare. He's not an angry person in general and tends to stay positive most of the time. It will only occur if he's incredibly pent up about a situation. He'd bottle up those emotions before the string being pulled and he snaps.

Easy to forgive, the moment he notices he's angry he's apologizing for lashing out. Poor boy can't handle you being scared, upset, and disappointed with him.

After a fight, he gives you the space needed before checking on you and asking if you're alright. Aether would pull you into a hug, and probably sob depending on how bad the fight was. Cuddles until your both happy again or unless you really don't want to be in his presence at the moment.

If the fight was really bad he gives you some space to think for a bit and try to get it off his head. Afterward, he goes to apologize to you, to where you either sob together or things go back to normal right after

Apologizes repeatedly to you, you could say you've forgiven him but he's gonna continue apologizing for another hour or so.

G ratitude - How grateful are they in general? Are they aware of what their s/o is doing for them?

Incredibly grateful for every little act his s/o does for him. Ever since losing his sister, he's been in a void and his s/o has been the light helping him back to his feet. Cheesy I know-

But he truly appreciates everything you do for him, it always brings a smile to his face whenever his s/o does the most simple little acts that go a long way for him. He acknowledges even the smallest of things

Simple acts such as setting up his stuff before he goes to complete commissions or cooking him some food. It always makes his day better.

H onesty - Do they have secrets they hide from their s/o? Or do they share everything?

Aether tells his partner pretty much everything, he dislikes keeping you in the dark. He would be really upset and heartbroken if he found out his s/o was hiding anything from him

He relies on you a lot, he tells you everything because you always put him at ease.

However, there are a few things that he would hide for a short time. He would tell his partner eventually but needs some time to plan out how to tell them. But those moments are rare and in between.

If he did find out that his s/o was hiding something from him, he'd be so torn :< feels betrayed a in way that you hid something from him.

Of course, he would listen to your reasoning as to why you kept secrets, but he starts to distance himself for a bit.

I nspiration - Did their s/o change them somehow, or the other way around? Like trying out new things or helped them overcome personal problems?

Aether works harder for you. In other words, he's constantly trying to impress you. He tries to act heroically around you to make you smile and all.

He learned to not always feel so down because of his sister and take time to be happy as well

He for sure helps you overcome any problems or barriers that have been holding you back, taking one step at a time. You work it out together and he's patient with the process

He's always inspired by you, he works harder for you and tries to complete his commissions at a faster rate so he can spend the rest of the day work you.

J ealousy - Do they get jealous easily? How do they deal with it?

Can go both ways. On one hand, Aether isn't really one to get jealous, as he has complete trust in his partner but on the other hand, there are times when he gets insecure or jealous over somethings

But for the most part he isn't jealous, there are moments where he's scared to lose you like he lost his sister, to be left alone again :<<

In the moments where he is jealous, he would tell his s/o that he's feeling envious. Getting it off his chest and hoping his S/o would help calm down his worries

If he's feeling really envious, which are incredibly rare, he would avoid you for a bit trying to let his jealousy die away before confronting you

He'd feel really bad if he accidentally made you feel jealous instead. He would remind you that all his love is reserved for you and only you.

K iss - Are they a good kisser? What was the first kiss like?

Something like that done here

An average kisser, a bit inexperienced when it comes to kissing, you're his first boyfriend/girlfriend but he caught on really fast.

But because of this, your first kiss ended up being really awkward and Aether got incredibly flustered cause he believed he did something wrong

He's still really shy whenever he kisses you, he grows flustered whenever you intimate the kiss.

His kisses are really gentle, pressing his lips against yours softly. Each kiss is filled with emotions, all his love into each one. Very gentle boi

L ove Confession - How would they confess to their s/o?

A mess

Poor boi is stuttering and fumbling over his words. He a nervous wreck but he's trying his best.

He planned everything out but when the moment came he tripped over his words.

He invites you over for a nice dinner, nothing too fancy and nothing too cheap, just right. He pays for food, slowly bringing the conversation to an idea of a relationship. Of course, he's hella flustered and trying not to show(which he does) it.

Then he kinda blurts out that he has a crush on you and wants to try out a relationship

If you say yes he's gonna have a huge smile on his face for the rest day, it's really adorable TwT

If you say no, however, he freezes in place for a while, the whole thing repeating in his head up to the point where you rejected him. He apologizes and excuses himself. You don't see him for a couple of days, since aether is avoiding you, he's really embarrassed to talk to you. Oh and congratulations you get a nasty nickname from Paimon :D

M arriage - Do they want to get married? How do they propose? What would the marriage be like?

He thought about it at least once when your relationship was growing. Similar to dreams, he had different scenarios in this head for the future and how they could play out.

He would like to get married one day, yes, but it isn't something he sees doing anytime soon as his primary goal is to find his sister, afterward however he will look into it more and suggest the idea to his s/o.

In terms of how he proposes, he takes you on a little adventure that highlights some your adventures you had together near the beginning of your friendship, before getting on one knee and popping the question.

Kind of that nostalgic feeling you get as you reminisce on some of the old memories you created together

The both of you plan the ceremony and incorporate your ideas into one. It's gonna be a big wedding though since pretty much all of Mondstadt, Liyue, and other nations that are yet to be explored will be attending.

Of course, if you wish for a smaller wedding, he doesn't mind at all and will plan out something smaller. He personally likes a small wedding too :)

N icknames - What do they call their s/o?

Aether isn't too keen on nicknames for his s/o but he does have a few. But for the most part, he calls you y/n, especially in public

He calls you sometimes a shorter version of your name. Or a flower that reminds him of you.

Really depends on your personality as well and which flower it associates with, or he might have a silly nickname for you that he called you once and it stuck with him. However, those types of nicknames are used rarely depending on the circumstance.

O n Cloud Nine - What are they like when they are in love? Is it obvious for others? How do they express their feelings?

Blush blush blush blush

He might be a little oblivious to it since your his first, he doesn't realize it until someone cough venti cough points out to him.

He's in denial at first, swirling over his words while his face reveals the truth. He's crushing hard

Aether tries to mask his little crush from you and he does pretty well minus a few moments where he's got off guard, que flustering soft boi

But when he's in love, he has a smile on his whenever speaking to the person that makes his heart skip a beat. It's pretty prominent to others once you notice the behavior shift from someone random to you.

He expresses his love in a little of everything; kisses and little hugs along with serenading you in words or perhaps gifting you something. A little mix of all of them

His favorite way to express his love is to have his hand intertwine with yours. It's simple but it comforts him knowing you're close. He loves it whenever you give him a slight squeeze of reassurance; it never fails to put a smile on his face

P DA - Are they upfront about their relationship? Do they brag with their s/o in front of others? Or are they rather shy to kiss etc. when others are watching?

Shy boy gets flustered in private, he gets really flustered showing PDA in public.

Don't get me wrong he loves showering you in affection but he gets easily flushed at the idea of people watching him kiss his s/o or giving them a comforting hug.

His PDA is average, he's open to hand-holding in public because it comforts him without having to do anything too affectionate in the public eye

He doesn't brag either, most people already know the existence of your relationship.

Although for the most part, he's trying to keep it a secret because of the Fatui and the threat it could place on you. You don't want La Signora chasing after you.

Q uirk - Some random ability they have that's beneficial in a relationship.

Paimon is usual around Aether meaning that whenever your feeling hungry, Paimon can point out the best places to sit down and have a delicious meal

An expert treasure hunter is in your area, and you're dating him! He knows where to find hints and little clues for treasures and can open any lock or seal. Many fortunes

He has so many stories to tell from his previous travels. It helps you connect more as you listen to him tell you every memory he can remember from the worlds he visited. You never get bored by his stories either.

R omance - How romantic are they? What would they do to make their s/o happy? Cliché or rather creative?

He's can be really creative in his antic when it comes to making his s/o happy, but he also sticks to some more cliche methods as well

As mentioned previously he's visited many worlds and has seen the various ways people would do to cheer up their partners.

He uses that to his advantage when trying something to get that smile he loves dearly on your face

But the also likes to take some classic routes, little gifts, or acts of affection to make you happy

Perhaps a rose banquet one day and something new and really imaginative the next. He can be a wild card when deciding

One time he jokingly asked Paimon for advice, of course, she suggested having sticky honey roast as a nice evening lunch date. Which he ended up taking you to that afternoon

He's willing to do anything-within reasonable terms- to make his s/o happy. If just point something out or specify on what would make you really happy; chances are he's going to do it for you

S upport - Are they helping their s/o achieve their goals? Do they believe in them?

100% support in you

He wants to see your goals accomplished as well. Just like your helping him find his sister, he helps you achieve your goal

If you allow him, he's willing to put aside some of his commissions to help you plan and get a better roadmap to obtain your goal

Aether helps keep you motivated whenever you're feeling down, reminding you of what you have accomplished so far. Cooking you food or bringing you some water to get your brain flowing again. As well as some encouragement from Paimon, although she tends to over exaggerate most of the time

He is also sure to help you take breaks whenever you're pushing yourself too much. He takes you outside to pick plants or berries, but it's really soothing and distracting

T hrill - Do they need to try out new things to spice out your relationship? Or do they prefer a certain routine?

It's an adventure every day with Aether

At the beginning of the relationship, he tried to follow a more classical relationship routine. Since he was so new to affection, e mimicked what he saw other couples do thinking it was the correct way to go. But after spending more time with you he strayed away from that, adding his own ideas along with yours

He's constantly traveling the world, meeting archons and other powerful beings. There always a battle to be fought or a harbinger to run from. A lot can happen in one day

And you're his trusty and equal companion, he likes to bring you along through the chaos that is Teyvat

In other words, there is always a thrill in your relationship, plus Aether is always open to trying something new occasionally. Never a dull moment except for that one lazy Sunday where you cuddle all day, but it's really wholesome

U nderstanding - How good do they know their partner? Are they empathetic?

Aether picks up on the little things that signal a behavior shift within you. With these notices he acts quickly to be sure your alright and accesses if he needs to shower you in more affection in order to make you happy >:0

He tries to sympathize with his partner, trying to understand the emotions they're going through. He understands grief and anger, as he had experienced it with the loss of his kin, and knows how to help alleviate his s/o

But he does try his best to help cheer you up regardless of the emotions you are feeling. Paimon is even there to cheer you with her own words

V alue - How important is the relationship to them? What is it’s worth in comparison to other things in their life?

Aether's relationship with you is something he holds close to his heart. It's incredibly important to him, and he is sure to voice how important you are to him.

His s/o is that last speck of hope and happiness in his life after being filled with pain for so long. He'd be devastated without you

Unfortunately, his sister is his first priority, his family comes close. Lumine is the only kin he has. But your also really important to him, and so he tries to shower you with affection daily

W ild Card - A random Fluff Headcanon.

Your Paimon's close friend, you get to hear her ramble about food- a lot. But she's also really supportive of your relationship, she's noticed how much happier Aether had become since then.

Aether likes it whenever you braid his hair. Finding it soothing as your fingers gently comb through his golden locks

X OXO - Are they very affectionate? Do they love to kiss and cuddle?

A shy boy wanting to shower his s/o in affection. He's not the most affectionate person out there but he does try to be romantic and such

He adores hugs more than kisses, he finds it further comforting to hold his partner close and reassured that there beside him. He wishes he could cuddle with you for hours however commissions among other tasks that always pull him back

He also likes kisses, there always gentle and soft and he mainly kisses you on the cheek, forehead, or lips.

So overall he is pretty affectionate and he tries his best to make you feel loved

Y earning - How will they cope when they’re missing their partner?

He can handle it for a few days, he has trust in you and your abilities. But he does think about you whenever you have to leave, wishing he could go with you. He's already missing your presence the moment you kissed him goodbye before venturing off to whatever.

Then he starts to become worried, his head is racing even though you're fine. He's trying to stay calm in the situation, which he does pretty well but it's clear something is troubling the traveler from another world. Nonetheless, he doesn't act out that worry

He starts to take up more commissions in hopes it will put his mind off It, overworking himself just a tad too much until he finds himself exhausted and turns in to rest for the night.

He refrains from any thoughts involving you being in a dangerous circumstance, he's trying to stay positive and counting down the days until your arrival back to Mondstadt or Liyue. But he has had that one thought or two, dreading over his shoulders

When you do return, the moment he spots your familiar figure; his mind is washed with relief as he makes his way towards you. He approaches with a soft, kind smile as he engulfs you into a hug. He asks you how the journey or task went and if you hit any roadblocks or difficulties.

He takes you to dinner that afternoon to talk some more, he misses you dearly :(

Z eal - Are they willing to go to great lenghts for the relationship? If so, what kind of?

As mentioned before Aether tries his best to make you happy, he'll try somethings out but he won't cross any unnecessary lines or ones that shouldn't be crossed

Listen- he's stolen a Gods Lyre, angered the cryo God, fought a Harbinger, and almost destroyed a nation- oh and he's a garden thief. He's willing to go to some extra lengths to make you happy-he just doesn't want to add on to the list of chaos that had occurred already

But as mentioned previously, his main goal is finding his sister and he tries not to stray from it too much. But yes, he does care about your relationship and he is sure to remind you that you always hold a special place in his heart :)

I'm done omg, yay

#genshin impact #genshin impact imagines #genshin impact scenarios #genshin impact x reader #genshin impact headcanons #aether x reader #genshin aether #genshin aether x reader

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nypmphetsbastard · 3 years

Text

They Both Die in the End

Genre: angst...just angst

Pairings: Eren Yeager x reader

Timeline: season 4 Eren

Summary: SPOILER ALERT! They both die in the end.

Warnings: Smut, angst, major character death, emotional, season 4 warnings do not continue if you’re not caught up with the anime.

A/N: this story is also posted on AO3

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If you could go back to it all, would you? Before Marley, before the war, before the titan shifters, before the fall of Shiganshina, before everything — would you go back? Go back to living peacefully inside the walls of Maria watching eh our next door neighbor Eren and his two other friends run around, too nervous to ask yet watching their games of tag together. Go back to the day the youngest Yeager son noticed you from afar and invited you to play with them. Go back to those days.

Those final days of peace. If you could go back to it all, would you? Before Marley, before the war, before the titan shifters, before the fall of Shiganshina, before everything — would you go back? Go back to living peacefully inside the walls of Maria watching eh our next door neighbor Eren and his two other friends run around, too nervous to ask yet watching their games of tag together. Go back to the day the youngest Yeager son noticed you from afar and invited you to play with them. Go back to those days.

Before it all fell.

Maybe. Maybe you would go back. But you couldn't. No matter how much prayed and wish upon a star, it would never come to pass. You were stuck. You were all stuck. But in a moment like this, you didn't mind being stuck here.

Stuck in his arms, under his broad shoulders and wrapped in your own personal layer of protection. His soft eyelashes laid gently along to top of his cheeks, the dark brown locks you loved so dearly had now grown a little past his chin and his once short and skinny frame had grown significantly since he turned 18.

You tenderly tucked his long hair behind his ear, watching as his eyelashes fluttered open at the lightest touch. It was sad, honestly, how light of a sleeper he'd become. Anyone who knew Eren only now would've laughed at a time he was a heavy sleeper, it was sad, how quickly he had to adapt to constant alert. No longer enjoying his moments of peace and quiet.

A brown broke you out of your thoughts as Eren licked his lips and drubbed the tiredness out of his eyes before sighed and looking down at the person in his arms.

Eren couldn't help but remember the words Jean had once said to him when they were just 15. "How you managed to find someone like that, I will never know. But don't screw it up, because you never know if the next time you'll see them will be on the street or in a body bag." He sighed, reaching his hand over to your cheek, gently caressing the skin.

He knew the two of you would never have a moment like this ever again, that his future will always result in complete anarchy and chaos but that wouldn't stop him from basking in the light that was you.

"Good morning." You giggled, this gentle touch sending shivers up your spine.

"Morning." He whispered back. "We have to get up soon. Captain Levi says we have more Marleyan's coming from the port today."

You sighed and pushed your head closer into his chest, "That's boring...and morbid. I just wanna spend time with you." You whined, Eren chuckled sadly.

"I know...but that doesn't mean we can't make it count now." Eren mumbled, leaning into your neck. You hummed and relaxed in his arms as he began to suck the skin on your neck.

"No hickeys. You know what Levi said about them." You breathed out trying to keep your composure, Eren pulled away with a shit eating grin.

"Whoops." you rolled your eyes at him and let your lips meet in a hungry kiss.

Wandering hands roaming each other's bodies wasn't uncommon between you whenever you got the chance, but no matter how much he touched you, you couldn't help but flinch and gasp into his mouth as he cupped your clothed mound.

"Eren," you pause to take a deep breathe as another moan threatens to escape your reddened lips, "I thought you said we had somewhere to be." You joked lightly.

"Fuck that." He cursed, looking up at you with his dark piercing gaze.

'If these are what Eldian devils look like, I wouldn't mind being a sinner' you thought to yourself.

If Eren Yeager was anything, oblivious was not it. He was always attentive with everything he did. But when the lights dimmed and your legs spread for him, Eren Yeager never missed a spot. Twisting and turning, rubbing and spitting, he'd do anything and everything to hear you let out those breathy moans of his name.

Eren Yeager never had such a good ring to it.

It never took a lot of to have you screaming for him. Eren had mapped out every crevice of your body that sent you shivers, every infinity 8 that had your legs shaking since the first night. He always knew what would have you screaming out in blissful pleasure. Whether it be in pain or pleasure.

"Eren, ah," your shaky hands reach for the scarred back of his past. Nails scratching the surface and painting the once pale canvas a burning red color.

The burning of your thighs was nothing compared to the knot in your stomach that he wouldn't let snap. He massaged your thighs as they sat above his shoulders, finally lifting his head to hear your desperate whines to finish. Lips and chin coated in wetness, he grinned and went right back to work. Your mercy pleas finally reached his ears as one of his hand reached up to grab yours, his other stimulating your most sensitive area to get the exact reaction he wanted.

One that left his shirt and his sheets drenched in you. Words didn't seem to form on your tongue yet he understand everything you needed. Planting a light kiss on your clit, he gently and carefully closed your legs, bringing them back down to earth and laying down on your side.

Once your breathing returned back to normal all you could mutter was a simple, "wow." Eren smirked cockily and grabbed your cheeks, pulling you into a much softer yet passionate kiss.

"I know." not even trying to make a smart comment, you closed your eyes, preparing for your high to end and the uncomfortable feeling of stickiness that filled the sheets, your thigh and your boyfriend's face.

"You have a little something there" you pointed out, pointing to your chin.

"Mhm, really? You made a mess too, want me to clean it up?" A yes caught in your throat as you realized what he was planning and clasped your hand onto his wrist.

"Don't. We still have somewhere to be."

That smile. That damned smile that always caused you nothing but trouble. Trouble in more ways than one.

Mikasa and Armin being the first to arrive on time was never a surprise, however coming after Sasha and Connie was borderline suspicious as those two were never on time...to anything. Connie snickered at the sight of you rushing over to the bench with a piece of bread stuck in your mouth as you tried tucking your shirt into your pants.

You sat down between to Mikasa and Jean, trying your best to not sound like you had ran over here in a hurry, which you had. It was in your best interest to just act like you'd been there the whole time, especially with how meticulous Captain Levi was with scheduling and all that. So you struck up a conversation.

"Hey Mikasa, lovely weather we're having." You spoke up, Mikasa looked up from where her eyes were down casted on her lap and gave you a small smile with a hint of confusion.

"Yes, it is lovely...I guess." She mumbled as her voice trailed off.

You leaned on your arms to look next to Mikasa, "Good morning, Armin." You greeted the blonde.

"Oh, good morning. Have you been there this whole time?" Armin questioned, his answer only causing tithe two snickering twins to laugh even harder.

"No Armin, she was out having a much better morning." Connie mocked, sending Sasha into a laughing fest with a whole piece of bread still lodged in her mouth. Armin look confused but shrugged it off and went back to drawing in his sketch book, a stress reliving habit he'd picked up after that day at the sea.

You kicked Connie in the shins and smiled at his hiss of pain and dramatic leg holding, Sasha joining in on your laughs until you kicked her too. She whined and rubbed her shin.

"Hey! I didn't even say anything!" She protested and you laughed at her, not noticing Mikasa's sharp gaze on you.

"Where's Eren?" Mikasa asked

"Commander Hange asked him to stay behind to prep beforehand. Why?"

"So I can ask him to leave your fun in the bedroom, respectfully." She smirked, pointing at the hickey on your neck. Your eyes widened at Mikasa's amused expression and tried to cover the deep red and purple stain with your hand. Jean snickered from next to you, using the magazine he very clearly wasn't using to cover up his puffed cheeks preventing him from laughing.

Everyone's favorite duo however, did not get the memo as they bursted out into a fit of laughter. Their pale cheeks turning bright pink as they leaned on each other for support, nearly throwing the other off the bench. You groaned and dropped your head onto the hardwood table, drowning in embarrassment.

The scouts had always loved to tease you and Eren at any given chance. Connie and Sasha being especially guilty of this, but even Mikasa loved to poke and prod at the two of you, making jokes of her own.

Mikasa has been your best friend since childhood, her love for both you and Eren only doubled in size when the two of you officially got together when you were 15. She was there for you after every failed mission, after every argument, or even when you just needed girl talk. Even if she never seemed the most emotionally capable person, Mikasa Ackerman was never wrong. She's somebody everybody could rely on, whether that he for protection or just as a friend, she was always there.

Always there to buy the constantly hungry Sasha snacks as you and many other scouts arrived to Marley in disguise. While Sasha basked at the taste of new foods, your eyes roamed the crowded city, trying your best not to push anyone. Then, your eyes landed on a familiar head of hair that stood at the edge of the port, looking off into the distance.

"Hey..." you spoke up before gently sliding your hand on his shoulder, a habit you picked up on because of how guarded Eren constantly is. "You okay?"

"Yeah, I think so." He mumbled, turning his body to face you directly and placing his hands on your shoulders, "Are you?" He questioned

"Mhm. This person dressed up as a clown mistook Captain Levi for a child and I think he actually might've traumatized the man." You joked, laughing at the past occurrence.

Although he didn't laugh, Eren smiled at your happiness, mentally taking a picture of this moment to hold onto later on.

"Oi! What do you think you're doing?" Levi interrogated, snatching the arm of a young boy who stood beside a clueless Sasha. You and Eren made your way through the commotion of people spewing out hateful words at the boy as they tried to figure out a brutal punishment for the child.

Sasha laughed nervously and lied for him, claiming he was just her younger sibling messing around, narrowly avoiding having the child nearly killed for his crime. The boy apologized profusely and thanked them for saving him from impending doom before running off with his younger brother. You smiled softly at the child as he ran off before noticing your boyfriend looking at him with longing and sadness.

"Eren? Hey, what's wrong?" You asked softly, reached over to place your hand on his cheek. He blinked and shook his head.

"Nothing, let's go."

Those next days, that very child had offered you and the scouts a place to rest your heads. Providing you all food, drinks and even alcohol which only ended in disaster and Sasha hunched over a bucket puking her guts out.

In your arms that night laid a tired Eren, his head on your chest listening to your heartbeat and feeling your chest rise up and down, mentally making sure you continued to do that. And as you slept soundly, the sharp burning sensation in his nose became too much to bear, Eren's tears silently fell.

They fell for the memories, or rather the premonition of his future. His cursed future.

They fell for the child he once was. A little boy who wanted nothing more than to prove himself and to his parents that he could go beyond, that he could be free in the world he was born into. A little boy who laughed and loved with his parents, his friends, and the little girl next door who he swore to his mother he'd marry. An innocent little boy.

They fell for his friends. The only people he couldn't live without no matter how much he tried to convince himself otherwise. Not just you, Mikasa and Armin — but Connie, Sasha, Jean, Historia and even Levi and Hange. He lived everyday of his life for the sake of them, for them to live their lives as freely as possible, for them to live the life he would never be able to.

For the days like before as they all worked on building the port. Sweaty, tired and burning arms as they all hauled ass into the half built train tracks and finally got a moment to relax.

"Make a base in Marley and infiltrate it, huh?"

"Hange sure has a plan for everything. I'll be able to show down on some real Marleyan cuisine." Sasha replied, her mind already lost a sea of new foods but you smiled at her enthusiasm

"Yeah? What should I bring? It would stink to get the runs."

"Stomach medicine, toothbrush, a taste of home..." Sasha listed off

"Did you even hear Hange's plan?" Mikasa questioned

"If the world knows that we want peace, maybe something will change." Armin suggested hopefully.

"Armin, you know I love the way you think but...not everyone thinks like you. Even the Marleyans we have here are still hot headed over us just existing in the same space as them, they don't seem like very peaceful people in my opinion." You spoke up, Armin sighed and nodded as a small moment a silence waved over you all.

"If only we had more time. I've got just over five years left. We're gonna have to decide who inherits my Titan soon." Eren brought up, a new point but not one that hadn't crossed all your minds.

"I will" Mikasa attempted to step up

"Not you. We still don't know what the Ackermanns are. And won't it hurt any plans with Hizuru if you become a Titan? No, for so many reasons." Jean dismissed, Mikasa looked down sadly, feeling as though there was nothing she could do to help.

"Then who will?" She snapped, you placed you hand over hers and gave her heartwarming smile before leaning your head on her shoulder in a means to calm her down.

"Me. First of all, I'm way smarter than Eren. Instead of a suicidal maniac, you'll have a gifted leader who shows good judgement in all situations. In other words, me." He concluded in his bashful statements. "I hate getting an Eren hand-me-down but who better than me?"

"Someone that amazing we don't wanna lose in 13 years, moron." Connie cursed, you snickered and nodded.

"He's right, Jean. All those things you just said about yourself are true, which is why we need you one hundred percent human and intact for over 13 years. You're too good of a leader to lose now." you explained, Jean groaned in annoyance.

"You're aiming to be regiment leader. I'll inherit Eren's Titan. It works out good, right?"

"Connie..." Eren faltered, slightly surprised at the high and dangerous position Connie was willing to take.

"That's not good at all. You're an idiot." Sasha replied

"Eh?"

"Don't 'eh' me. We can't leave such an important role up to an idiot."

"Eh?" Connie continued, still shocked.

"Doggone it...I'll inherit it. I've got combat experience...I'm someone you can trust...By process of elimination, it's gotta be me." Sasha divulged, you lifted your head from Mikasa's shoulder and raised your hand.

"Um hello? I'm still here." You said sarcastically,

"I know but Eren's your boyfriend and I find it pretty morbid if you were forced to eat your lover for the sake of humanity so, by default, it has to be me!"

"You guys..." Eren mumbled, going unnoticed as Sasha continued her rambling.

"I dun wanna. I sure dun wanna though." Sasha trembled, the mere thought of everything Titan shifters had to go through repeating in her head on loop.

"Wait, huh? Isn't that weird?" Connie spoke up again

"What?"

"Well you know...you said an idiot's not fit for the role." Sasha raised an eyebrow at him, still confused, "You're more of an idiot than I am, so you're contradicting yourself." As Connie finished his explanation, the two exchanged Huh's and watched each other dramatically.

"Moral of the story, you're both idiots." You stood up from the hard box, "I'll inherit the Titan. Who knows maybe I'll be the first super sexy female attack Titan. Like Annie." You thought out loud

"You think Annie's Titan is hot?" Jean asked incredulously, you put one finger up and shushed him, not wanting to discuss the topic further.

"No. I don't want any of you to inherit it." Eren stated, "And especially not you." He looked at you.

"Oh come on, once you die I'll have nothing to live for. Besides, I don't wanna be old anyway." You shrugged nonchalantly, Eren shook his head.

"No! You guys are more important to me. More than anyone else. So, I want you to have long lives and..." he looked at you again, "when I die...I want you to move on—"

You cut him off with a scoff and grabbed your makeshift seat, dropping it next to his. "No, that's bullshit. I won't accept that." You protested

"So, what? You're just gonna wallow about me the rest of your life without even trying to do anything better?"

"Yes! That's exactly what I'm gonna do." Eren scoffed at your answer and shook his head.

"I'm serious." He snapped

"So am I! I don't wanna start a family some random person I know I'll never love. I don't want a home if it's not with you, Eren." you objected, "So, if worse comes to worst, i'll inherit your Titan." Eren sighed, already knowing he would never change your mind once it was made up.

"Bleh, keep the cute sappy stuff in the bedroom guys." Jean complained, lightening up the mood in the cart as everyone chucked lightly.

"Best get used to it, Kirstein." You swung your arm over Eren's shoulder, "I'm not leaving this Earth without my man." You said proudly, the boy blushing at your words.

My man. That's all he ever wanted to be to you. Yours. For now and forever, he didn't care if he had to trample anyone and everyone in his path, Eren would do anything to keep that title in your heart.

There was a point in time once when he thought of growing a family with you. Even though he felt he wouldn't be the best father in the world, he couldn't help but grasp at any straws that led to a happy ending with you. Maybe in another life, he always thought to himself.

Another life where you were all free. Where all of you could be real teenagers, go to a normal high school, have normal life and live a full life. Where Ymir, Bertolt, Erwin and everybody else didn't have to die for the sake of everyone else. Where all of you could get a full nights sleep without constantly having to watch your back.

Yeah...another life sounded like bliss.

But another life is not what you had, what you had now was war.

A war none of you were prepared for. None except Eren, who proudly and happily pounded into the face of the war hammer Titan, not leaving any room for full transformations. Even as he became outnumbered with all odds against him, he was granted his final words in which he uttered a simple.

"It's now or never, Mikasa."

Unleashing all scouts in hiding as they rose up, dropping thunder spears into the Marleyan soldiers and aiding Eren in his fight. Bodies and bombs dropped left and right as Mikasa crouched down next to her best friend.

"Eren...Do you have any idea what you've done? You killed civilians, you killed children, too. You've done things that can't be undone." She pleaded with him, trying to see even a glimmer of sympathy in his eyes and yet there was none to be found.

"She's mad at you...you know that?" She tried once more, finally getting a hint of a reaction out of Eren. That reaction lasted only a millisecond and the hurt in his eyes was once again replaced with a look of dullness and lackluster of his usual bright blue ones.

He looked away, "She can be mad all she wants, it makes no difference to me. The fight isn't over." Mikasa gasped at the sight of the war hammer she'd just took down moments before standing right back up on its feet. And a constant pitter patter hit the back of her head at Eren's words.

How quickly he shoved aside your feelings and put his own before it, a rare thing Eren had never done before. But for now, your job in all this was to stay alive.

You assisted in as much combat as possible before making your way back into the airship along with the rest of the remaining scouts. Being the first to arrive on the ship meant biting your nails in anxiety as you waiting for everyone else to reach it. Armin reached down for the boy he once thought to be his best friend, pulling him up into the ship.

Just like the old days, Levi Ackerman had a couple kicks in store for Eren, not hesitating to remind him of how much he changed. Even bringing up his past in the underground and the dirty look Eren had grown into, never expecting to see it on the boy he gave up everything for. As much as it much as it hurt to see Eren being kicked around like a rag doll, you wouldn't get in the middle, especially knowing what he'd just done.

The lives he ended, the irreparable damage he had caused, it all gave Levi more than enough reason to toss him around. You, on the other hand, didn't make an effort to speak to him.

And for Eren, that was okay. If it would change anything, Eren would make you hate him for the rest of your life. If it would change anything, Eren could've saved Sasha. If it could change anything, Eren would restart everything and never invite you to play tag with him. He would steer clear from you at all costs. He would let you marry some townsman, have a couple kids and grow old inside the walls, never to be a witness of all the atrocities outside of them.

If Eren can change anything, he will make sure you stay alive. No matter who or what gets in his way, whether he has to tear down every wall or speak to Ymir Fritz her damn self, Eren Yeager will save you from death.

Eren Yeager will not leave this godforsaken earth without his woman.

#eren yeager #eren aot #eren smut #snk eren #eren jeager x reader #mikasa layouts #snk season 4 #attack on titan #levi ackerman #aot x reader #zeke yeager #aot final season #aot headcanons #aot manga

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yurtletheturtlehenderson · 3 years

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COSMIC - S3:E3; Chapter Three, The Case of The Missing Lifeguard - [Pt. 1]

A Will Byers x Reader Series

𝘌𝘭 𝘨𝘰𝘦𝘴 𝘢𝘴𝘵𝘳𝘢𝘭 𝘱𝘳𝘰𝘫𝘦𝘤𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘥𝘪𝘴𝘤𝘰𝘷𝘦𝘳𝘴 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘉𝘪𝘭𝘭𝘺 𝘩𝘢𝘴 𝘥𝘰𝘯𝘦 𝘴𝘰𝘮𝘦𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩 𝘏𝘦𝘢𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳. 𝘞𝘩𝘪𝘭𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘨𝘪𝘳𝘭𝘴 𝘵𝘳𝘺 𝘵𝘰 𝘧𝘪𝘯𝘥 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘮𝘪𝘴𝘴𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘭𝘪𝘧𝘦𝘨𝘶𝘢𝘳𝘥, 𝘞𝘪𝘭𝘭 𝘵𝘳𝘪𝘦𝘴 𝘵𝘰 𝘨𝘦𝘵 𝘔𝘪𝘬𝘦 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘓𝘶𝘤𝘢𝘴 𝘪𝘯𝘵𝘦𝘳𝘦𝘴𝘵𝘦𝘥 𝘪𝘯 𝘋&𝘋. 𝘋𝘶𝘴𝘵𝘪𝘯 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘚𝘵𝘦𝘷𝘦 𝘴𝘱𝘺 𝘰𝘯 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘮𝘢𝘭𝘭 𝘴𝘩𝘰𝘱𝘴, 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘙𝘰𝘣𝘪𝘯 𝘵𝘳𝘪𝘦𝘴 𝘵𝘰 𝘥𝘦𝘤𝘪𝘱𝘩𝘦𝘳 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘙𝘶𝘴𝘴𝘪𝘢𝘯 𝘮𝘦𝘴𝘴𝘢𝘨𝘦.

⚠️: more Billy/Mind Flayer shenanigans, more Y/n being Not Straight™️ and slight, whatever the huffy, whiney hell Hopper was during a majority of the season

📝: yall, idk how to describe hairstyles so I'm gonna clear it up now; the hairstyle Y/n is doing on El is the coil ponytail she wears at the end in That Scene™️ 🥲🚚👋📝🛣

Yes, I regret the whole "sisters" failsafe I put in specifically to stop myself. But as it turns out, no I cannot suppress the gay. So innocent, mutual pining ahead! 🥳🎉🌈

||𝟑𝐑𝐃 𝐏𝐄𝐑𝐒𝐎𝐍 𝐏𝐎𝐕||

A pair of sock-covered feet bounce happily on the carpeted floor as Madonna's Angel blasts through the radio on the dresser. Max jumps back and forth on El's bedroom carpet, singing into the hairbrush she had found on the nightstand. Beside her, sitting on the bed is the girl herself, sporting her new colorful look; engrossed in a selection of teen magazines that are splayed out before her.

"You must be an angel,"

El bobs her head along with the tune, careful of Y/n's hand weaving through her hair from where she's kneeled behind her on the bed. She grins up at Max before going back to her work, her lips moving as she silently sings along.

"I can see it in your eyes,"

Y/n finishes the last coil behind El's left ear, and pulls it together with the other, merging her hair into a ponytail at the nape of her neck. After she tightens the bright blue scrunchie one last time, she mutters a defeated, "Alright. I tried," before she maneuvers around El across the mattress and allows herself to fall back on the right side of the bed, her head propped up on the rows of pillows. She grabs a magazine, boredly sifting through it while El delicately feels around the back of her head with a smile, admiring Y/n's work.

"Full of wonder and surprise,"

El's attention quickly returns to the magazine in her hands when she flips the page. She has to turn it sideways to see the whole thing. A young man, who El guessed to be just a little older than Steve, was smiling back at her.

Max's singing and dancing come to a slow when she notices El lingering on the page. With a chuckle, she discards the hairbrush from where she found it and kneels beside the bed.

"Oh, you found Ralph Macchio," Max simpers.

"Macchio?" El asks with a smile.

"Yeah," Max nods. "he's the Karate Kid,"

Both and El and Y/n jump when Max suddenly cuts the air in a mock karate chop and yells, "Hai-yah!"

They giggle and Y/n just rolls her eyes playfully. Particularly, at what comes next.

"He's so hot, right?" Max asks.

An amused grin glues itself to Y/n's face as her eyes peek out over the top of magazines to catch El's reaction. Y/n's smile spreads, buried under the pages when she sees El's face lit up in a blush.

"I bet he's an amazing kisser, too," Max says, drawing out a funny look in El's eyes. "Hey, uh,"

Y/n finds her eyes drawn to Max when she feels the old mattress dip a little under her weight. She notices a funny, almost intrigued look on her face.

"is Mike a good kisser?" She asks.

Y/n lets out an involuntarily "Blech!" At the question, discarding her magazine back to the pile with her nose scrunched up in disgust despite the smile still on her lips.

El laughs at Y/n, lightly shoving her knees that sat propped up above her as she shoots her a smile. "Not 'blech',"

Y/n has to readjust her head on the pillows to gawk up at El properly, a funny look hidden in her eyes.

"Wait, so is he like, actually," Y/n makes another face, failing to get through the sentence with a straight face. She laughs a little, putting a mocking tone in her voice. "'good' at kissing?"

El doesn't answer right away, much too confused with the direction this conversation had gone. She blushes again, giving her awaiting friends a bashful shrug.

"I don't know. He's my first boyfriend,"

Max is quick to correct her, but she does so gently. "Ex-boyfriend,"

El's face falls.

But Max is also quick to console her. She lands a gentle hand on El's shoulder, her voice going soft.

"Hey, don't worry about it. Okay?" El still doesn't seem too sure. "He'll come crawling back to you in no time, begging for forgiveness."

Y/n subconsciously fiddles with the ring pop still on her finger, a thin sheet of plastic still covering the candy diamond.

"I guarantee you, him and Lucas are, like, totally wallowing in self-pity and misery right now," Max's face scrunches up as she mocks the aforementioned exes. "They're like, 'Oh, I hope they take us back!'"

Y/n laughs, her left hand lightly smacking Max's arm, grabbing her attention.

"Yeah, but, Mike's probably more like," Max fights a sudden laugh when she catches the knowing look in Y/n's eyes. "'I hope they take us back! They have to—'"

Neither Max nor Y/n can fight the grin breaking out on both their faces as they finish in perfect sync.

-"take us back! Nyeh-nyeh-NYEH!"

Once again delightfully confused, El's stare travels between her newest best friend and her oldest; a warm feeling burrowing deep in her chest and gut, her stomach aflutter as she laughs with them.

"God, what I wouldn't give to see the look on their stupid faces," Max says, shaking her head wistfully.

El goes quiet, something neither of her friends miss.

"What is it?" Max asks.

That seems to snap everything into place, and Y/n props herself up on her hands. There's enough mischief in her eyes to match El's, and she quirks a brow.

"Wait. Are you serious?"

El only smirks, shrugging her shoulders.

"Will someone please tell me what's going on?" Max asks, only to find herself under two impish stares.

⊹ ⊹ ⊹

El sits cross-legged against her dresser, the radio switched to static sitting just above her head. In her hands is the multi-colored headband Y/n had gifted to her over the holidays when her hair started to fall in her face. They both knew it could also double as a comfortable, makeshift blindfold in case she ever found herself traveling to the void again.

As she prepared to do now.

She hooks the headband over her head, pulling it down over her eyes as Y/n and Max took a seat.

"Is this really gonna work?" Max asks excitedly from where she's perched on the edge of the bed.

El nods, and Max's face lights up in awe.

"Holy shit, this is insane-!"

"Max."

"Right, quiet. I'm sorry,"

Y/n chuckles up at her noiselessly, completely understanding the excitement of it all. Particularly, since she had never once witnessed El demonstrating these powers unless it had been necessary.

Then came the waiting part.

Y/n had forgotten about the waiting.

It was all they could do. Wait as they watch El draw in a deep breath, allowing her mind to reach out to the person it had most.

She feels the imaginary water at her feet first, as she always did. It didn't take her as long as it used to to fine-tune the distorted voices cutting in and out, much like what she found her radio to do sometimes. But she did it soon enough.

She's back in the void, for the first time in a long while.

Part of her was worried it would be harder without as much practice as she got last year, but it wasn't.

The image that lay ahead of her was clear, the voices even clearer.

"What did I do wrong? What could I have done wrong?"

Mike.

He was laying on the couch. The one from his basement. El recognized it immediately.

And he wasn't alone, that much she had suspected.

"Do I have to go through this again?" Lucas asks, sounding tired.

He was pacing around the couch, rubbing his face. Will was with them, he was hovering over the small table she had sat at only years ago.

"I see them," El says.

Max lowers herself to the carpet, sitting next to Y/n who leans in curiously.

"What are they doing?" Y/n asks.

"Eating."

The crunch of Dorito chips Mike had shoved into his mouth was loud enough to echo out across the entire void. He continues through an obnoxious mouthful.

"I just don't understand what I did to deserve this,"

El has neared them now, and she turns her head curiously to Will when he scoffed. He looked frustrated, and he sounded it too. But El could tell he was trying to fight it for the sake of his friends' feelings.

"Look, it sucks that that happened," he says. "But why don't you guys try and take your mind off of it for-"

"For the last time, Will. No! Not now," Lucas says, turning away just in time to miss the boy's shoulders slump. He back to Mike, releasing a heavy sigh. "You didn't do anything, Mike. That's my whole point. You're the victim here."

El's eyes fall back to Mike, not all sure about what she was feeling.

"I know," he cries out. "It's just, why is she treating me this way?"

"Mike-"

"I don't know." Frustrated, he shakes his head. "What did I do wrong? What did I do wrong?!"

"Mike, stop it!" Will has to yell to be heard, but his friends eventually turn their attention his way. "you know what you did wrong!"

They watch him carefully, as does El.

Just grateful to have their attention, he softens just a notch "You messed up, alright? But there's just not much you can do right now,"

"He's right," Lucas sighs, bending over to move Mike's feet out of to make room before taking a seat. "I mean, we told the truth and everything,"

Will let out a bitter laugh. "No, you didn't! You got caught! You told them you were shopping for them, but that's it. You still kept lying about your Nana,"

Max and Y/n watch El carefully, the only indication something had happened came from her angered sigh.

"They lied about Nana," she says finally.

"Oh, I knew it," Max hissed.

Y/n merely placed her forehead in her hands tiredly as she waited for more information.

"But we still tried! That's gotta count for something," Mike cries, stuffing more food into his mouth. "I mean, shouldn't that count for something?"

"Mike, relax. Just... relax," Lucas sighs into his hands yet again, clearly exasperated. "And stop asking rational questions."

"I know, I know. You're right," Mike sighs. His expression quickly turned bitter as he sent his friends a sour look. "Because women act on emotion and not logic,"

"Precisely," Lucas nods. "It's a totally different species."

El's breathing grows deeper and for a moment the pair of friends fear the worst. But the truth was, while El didn't quite exactly know what they were saying, she knew it was foul.

"They say we are 'species'."

-"What?"

-"Come again?"

"'Emotion, not logic."

-"What?"

-"Come again?"

Will shifted on his feet, looking unsure as to what to say, or if he should at all.

"Will is upset,"

Y/n scoffs, looking between Max and El. "He should be if they're saying that shit." She fires, worry briefly taking over her anger over the doubtful thought seeded in her mind. Quickly she leaned forward.

"Wait, he wasn't saying that was he?"

Relief sweep over her when El shakes her head.

She finds her eyes on him again, looking as if he was trying too hard to fit in and not say the wrong thing. El hadn't known him for terribly long, but she knew enough to realize this shouldn't be normal.

"Guys," he says, his eyes darting to the small table he had been setting up. "Come on, it's ready. You already said you'd play a month ago when Dustin got back. I've been planning ever since! And I really think it'll help take your mind off of all this."

Lucas groans.

"Will! We already told you. Not right now," he shakes his head as if scolding a small child.

"They are upset with him."

"Why?" Y/n pressed, sharing an equally concerned look with Max.

"They broke up with you, what else is there to talk about?"

"Easy for you to say, you still have a girlfriend!" Mike throws back.

"'Easy for Will to say,'" El repeats.

Y/n could only imagine what they were putting Will through right now. Or just what her words could mean. Her guilt from having to cancel weighed heavier and heavier.

"He says..."

They all watch, El included, as all his frustrations boil over.

"Well, none of that matters now, does it?!"

Shocked at his outburst, Lucas and Mike break into matching, sour grins nevertheless.

"Then join us, Will," Mike says, sharing a smirk with Lucas. "Join us in trying to figure the greatest mystery of all; the female species!"

"What? What's he saying?" Y/n asked.

But she receives no answer. El had fallen quiet.

El cocks her head, her glare thrown to each boy like daggers, feeling an anger of her own. As well as a protectiveness.

That didn't last long, however. Not moments after, Mike seemed to be challenging his own foul behavior. His mouth opened up wide, letting loose a deep and billowing belch.

"Dude," Mike laughed lazily, gesturing around him as he grinned up at his friends. "You can smell the nacho cheese,"

El recoiled, her upper lip hooking in a grimace both in and out of the void.

She's relieved to see even one of them disgusted by his antics — Will, but it doesn't change her annoyance. But it was better, and far less confusing than Lucas who broke out in a sly grin.

"I get that beat,"

"What?" Mike mumbles in between picking his teeth with his tongue.

Baffled, El looks to Will again whose face pales. He quickly shakes his head, his words pleading.

"Oh, no."

"No, Lucas," Mike says, jumping in. "No!"

El watches curiously as Lucas's grin stretches wider — "No, Lucas!" — and he lifts his right leg — "Lucas! LUCAS!" — and...

El stumbles back in shock when the sound hits suddenly. It echoed louder than the burp had — far louder — and only grows louder as Lucas lifts his leg higher.

El rips the headband off her head to reveal her widened eyes, her shoulders moving and falling in a panicked-like state.

Never blinking, her mouth still wrenched open in shock, she turns to gape at her friends.

"What happened?"

She didn't answer.

"Are you okay?" Y/n pressed, fearing the worst.

She breaks out in a grin, a fit of sudden giggles sent her slouching into the carpet and her head landing in Y/n's lap. Max and Y/n welcomed her reaction with open arms, her infectious laughter spreading to them despite the utter bewilderment they were feeling. Y/n looked down at her friend, trying not to laugh.

El managed to peel her eyes open long enough to see Y/n's crooked smile poking into her view of the ceiling and she loses it all over again.

"What?" She laughs.

"What happened?"

El clutched her aching sides. Every time she tried to speak, the silliness of it all stole her words all over again.

It had been completely revolting and

angering. But it was also the most fun she'd ever had in that horrible place. This also being why it was so hard to wipe the smile from her face.

⊹ ⊹ ⊹

Will stumbled back as far away as possible from the massive stink cloud he was sure would drown him. Mike had stumbled off the couch, waving at the air as Will buried his nose in his shirt.

"Oh, man," Mike groans. "what the hell, Lucas?"

"Come on, that was impressive,"

"So was Will," Mike shoots him a knowing smirk. "Finally realizing the frustrations of the female species,"

"That wasn't what I said," he shakes his head, growing angrier by the second. "I said it doesn't matter if I have a girlfriend or not right now cause I can't see her! Both of us have to clean up your messes and it's the same reason why we missed our six month anniversary last month,"

Both Mike and Lucas wince. "Congrats?"

Will sighs, throwing himself in his seat at the D&D table.

⊹ ⊹ ⊹

The cabin's front door was nearly thrown off its hinges as an inebriated Hopper stumbled across the threshold. The door slammed shut behind him, shaking the room as he huffed and puffed. Several times he nearly lost his balance just standing still, but despite the blurred vision and numbed senses he could still make out the muffled radio from his daughter's room.

That wasn't good. At least, that's all Hopper could comprehend right away before he pieced together why; that always meant Mike was here.

And the door was shut.

"Hey!" No response. "Hey!"

The ache of rejection and embarrassment he had been feeling all night had been drowned in bottles of wine from Enzo's, numbing a great deal when Joyce had failed to show. But it couldn't quite extinguish his anger, and that was all that was left now. And he had no problem channeling that into this moment.

In his drunken state, he manages to march across the living room without stumbling into anything and his voice rises behind his gritted teeth.

"When I say three inches, three-"

A small yelp and a short burst of hot hair stinging his sweating skin and knocking over the lamp on the desk was the first thing he registered after the boom of the door being busted open. Before him, was the sight of El and her friends lounging across her floor, flipping through magazines and gawking up at him.

He realized then what had happened judging by Y/n drawing in a deep breath, and dropping her head into her hands. She had clearly been especially startled being so close to the door and had inadvertently created a mini shockwave that swept across every loose item in the room. He could hear her cursing into her hands as Max glared up at him.

"Do you knock?! Jeez!"

"Yeah!" El repeated. "Jeez!"

At that moment, Hopper couldn't remember a time he had back-pedaled so quickly. He could hear his slurred words stringing together a nervous apology.

"Wo-wo-oh, hey," he gulps. "I'm sorry."

The three girls continue to gawk up at him from the floor.

"I thought that, uh-,"

"If you were expecting Mike, he isn't here," Y/n said.

"We wanted to have a sleepover," El says, still beyond excited at the thought of having one since Y/n told her about them almost a year ago. "Is that...okay?"

"Yeah,"

The word fell out of Hopper's mouth before he could will it, his entire demeanor melting away in relief.

"Yeah. Yeah. Yeah," he said, his voice going higher than normal as he stumbled through the tension. "Your parents know you guys are here?"

"Yup," Max says, and Y/n nods.

Blazing through the past few moments, or at least attempting to, Hopper waves his arm dismissively and his slurring intensifies.

"Uh, yeah, it's cool. Yeah. That's-That's really cool."

This was great! His "heart-to-heart" had worked. At least the way he did it. He couldn't count on his hands the number of times he had asked El about the others; silently hoping she'd take the hint and get him out of long, awkward discussion. But she never had, she only went on about Mike, and the more the summer stretched on the less he heard about Y/n or—

"Did you need something?" Max asks, snapping him out of his thoughts.

He hadn't realized he had been just standing there, swaying slightly and zoning out.

He was overstepping. He could see that now. And not just because of the embarrassment written all over his daughter's face.

"No, no," he says quickly, shaking his head and making a lazy grab for the doorknob. "Uh, I'll leave. I'll just let you... I'll leave you..."

His voice trails off before being swallowed completely when the door shuts with a click. For a moment, Hopper just stands there processing it all.

A smirk hooked his lips.

No Mike.

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Pride Month Resources and Links

168 Ways to Donate in Support of Black Lives & Communities of Color

Save The Tears: White Woman's Guide

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