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hoonhrt · 3 years

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MUSIC SHOP

: pairing — idol! heeseung x music store worker! reader

: genre — fluff

: album recc. — case study 01 by daniel caesar and any of the albums i mentioned throughout the story!

: a/n — this is a little more on the lengthier side so please know that before reading! (i couldn’t help myself i luv hee too much)

it was a slow day at the shop. the dim fairy lights hung around lowly, making the atmosphere feel even slower. you walked around the store pushing a small grey cart that held all the albums, records, and cassette tapes one could ever imagine of, placing everything in their correct spots for future consumers to find.

the sound of a faint bell was heard from the back of the store. where you were, indicating that someone had came in. you flatten out the front of your sweater and rush to greet the costumer. you are met with a tall man dressed in all black from head to toe, water droplets fell off the shoulder of his jacket and you make a mental note to mop the floor later.

“hello! welcome to moonshines music. please let me know if you need help with anything, i’ll be happy to assist!” you cheerfully exclaim. you welcome costumers with a joyful energy that even cheers them up, it was your thing. the costumer pulled down the black mask from his face and waited for you to react. he was a slightly astonished when a reaction never came. no gasps, no eyes widening, no realization of who he was. just you with a firm smile on your face waiting for him to walk away and start shopping. he eyes you for a little before nodding his head and makes his way to the direction of the CD albums.

he pondered this feeling for a little. he wasn’t used to not being recognized. i mean, everyone knows him. he was on ever magazine cover and topped all the charts with his music. his face was plastered on every product poster that covered the walls of the busy city. so how could you not? he thinks that maybe you didn’t want to scare him off or bother him with pictures and autographs, inflating his ego a little bit. but still, why did you not say anything?

“excuse me! do you mind helping me out?” you could hear his voice from across the store as he shouted for you. jogging from your previous to his still figure.

“how can i help you?” continuing on your energetic personality. he didn’t have a real reason to ask for help, he was just too intrigued by you and needed a reason to converse with you. he looks around the store frantically for a minuet before looking back behind him to the CD’s he initially walked towards. “can you choose an album for me?” he blurts in your face loudly.

this wasn’t the first time someone asked for music recommendations but he walked in with confidence so you assumed he was a man who knew his music. “uhh yes um— do you perhaps have favourite genre that you maybe like?” you question him. he just stares at you, his lips folded in with a blank expression on his face. he shakes his head no. you politely nod again, now even more conflicted with what to recommend. you trail your eyes around the store till you see through the window next to the door. the sky is crying, whilst gray clouds surround it. the streetlight emitting an orange hue that reflect the fallen rain drops on the glass and you suddenly remember the small drops of water that trickled down his jacket sleeve when he first entered the store.

walking behind him you scan for the letter D section and begin to search for the album. letting out a soft ‘hmm’ before pulling out the album and handing it to him. “Case Study 01 by Daniel Caesar. perfect for rainy days when you aren’t lost in your thoughts.” you end with a smile on your face. ‘so they really have no idea to who I am, huh’ he thinks to himself. he looks down at the album in his hands than looking back up at you. a gentle smile reaching his lips. he follows you to the cashier register and pushes the album towards you. “that’ll be $10.15! card or cash?” he whips out his wallet and takes out a credit card. you can’t help but notice it was a black card, a card only the richest of people have. you wonder how this man can be so rich and why he is buying from a tiny music store in the middle of a unknown area.

you’re pulled away from your thoughts when the sound of the machine goes off, indicating the purchase has gone through. you delicately place the album into a tiny bag and hand it over to him with glee. “enjoy the album sir! if you ever do comeback, let me know what you thought about it!” you say in a courteous manner. the young man now looks at you with a toothy grin on display for you to awe at. he nods in affirmation before exiting. the atmosphere becoming quiet again. you hoped to see that man again.

another week has rolled around. you hum under your breath a silly little tune from a song on one of your many playlists, sending another customer off a new record they seemed to be extremely excited about. your job wasn’t much but seeing people share the same love for music as you was something that never failed to make you love life. wiping down the cashier, you hear the door chime and see the same handsome man from last week. you catch a glimpse of the clear sky and the natural light of the sun from out the door as he enters.

“i LOVED that album! you described it literally perfectly, it fit the vibes of the weather sooo much but didn’t leave me agonizing about life like how the rain usually makes me feel.” it made you so happy and almost accomplished to have someone come back and praise you for your music choice. you were about to start telling him it was no big deal before he proposes, again, to choose another album for him. you look at him a little unsure, you honestly didn’t know what to give him this time and you were scared he wouldn’t like it this time. he can see the anxiety flush over your face but lets you know he is looking for something this time. “give me your childhood favourite album. like, you know every single lyric for every song on this album.” your eyes go wide as you practically jump towards the shelf. he giggles quietly, thinking how cute you looked.

you prance towards the shelf knowing exactly where it was. in your hands was the Up All Night by One Direction, you shove the album into his hands with a passionate smile. he looks at you and tries to hide his judgment from you, which doesn’t work as you can see his eyebrow arch up and study the album in slight disgust. “hey! i danced to this album every night before i went to sleep for 3 years as a kid okay? it’s my favourite album!” your bottom lip pushes out, gazing at him with eyes the resemble a cute puppy. he throws his head back lets out a laugh that you think you could listen to for hours on end.

just as the prior week, he passes you the album to scan through and pulls out his card to pay. he was about to make his way out before you stop him. “can I have your name?” you requested. you took a liking to the kind guy, he had a pretty face and laugh that you particularly enjoyed. he checks his phone and swiftly swipes through the millions of notifications he has, then gazing back up at you. a genuine look plastered on your face. a look that feigned innocence, kept promises, and truly enjoyed life for what it was. “heeseung. my name is heeseung.”

you tug the key out of the door lock with a little force. the moon created a source of light and comfort as you made your way away from the shop and towards the subway station. you worked longer than usual and fatigue was the only thing felt within your weak bones. a car pulled up next to you, the window rolled down and revealed the person that has been occupying your thoughts recently, heeseung.

“on your way home?” you nod. “hop in, i’ll drive you home, we can listen to some music while we’re at it.” now you usually don’t just get into random peoples car, but you trusted him. who else would listen One Direction because someone asked them to?

his car was black from top to bottom, mirroring his outfits that he always wore. the windows were tinted and it looked intimidating from the outside, but on the inside sat a doe-eyed boy with the prettiest smile to exist. heeseung’s hand reaches out to turn up the volume of the car sound system. the sound of Frank Ocean’s voice fills up the empty sound within his car. it was song you were unfamiliar with. you ask what song this was and he lets out a dramatic gasp, almost looking offended. “you DON’T know this song? I guess pretty people can have flaws huh,” he turns his head to watch you flush a pink shade that can still be seen despite the darkness. a sight he thinks is quiet lovable.

the car ride to your home lasted much shorter than you wished it did. you two talked about everything under the moon. favourite songs, old childhood friends, past lovers. heeseung enjoyed the fact that you didn’t know his career identity. to the world he was Lee Heeseung, world renowned singer and model, but to you he was just, heeseung. a young boy who loved music and loved the world involved around it. you made him feel like a regular person again.

as you open the car door to make way into the glass doors of your apartment complex, heeseung grabs your wrist and pulls you back into the car. “how about... i lend you my favourite album this time, and next week on—” he checks the schedule his manager sent him, “saturday at 6 pm, i pick you up and we can talk more about it hm?” he holds his phone towards you with a cheeky smile on his face. you shake your head in disbelief as you bit back a smile of your own that is creeping on to your face. “I’ll see you then, hee.” your heart skipping beats as you walk away from the running vehicle.

unbeknownst to you, an excited heeseung punches the air rapidly with excitement. he silently screams into the night like a kid. feeling as if he was on cloud 9 to have scored a date with someone who’s a) the most beautiful person he’s ever seen and b) someone who likes him for his truest self.

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acourtofsnakes · 3 years

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Cabur - Rogue, Chapter 6| The Mandalorian x Force Sensitive! Reader (f)

Summary: A few weeks have passed and after landing on a small planet to collect a bounty, you and Mando decide to take a little trip to the market to stock up on some things. Nothing will come up here.. right?

Warnings: Angsty angsty annnnngst, (Sorry, I don’t mean to be so horrible to dear reader), Swearing (mild), brief mentions of death, touching on the same things as chapter 4 but not as heavy but I’ll still add the trigger warnings ♥︎ These chapters will get lighter, I promise,

Not beta read, I wanted to get this one out because I love it so apologies for any mistakes, I’ll be going in to edit a little later

Trigger warnings: Anxiety, horrible thoughts/insults, triggering comments maybe, thoughts of not being able to cope.

Words: About 6210

AN: Okay, okay, so, I was listening to my Rogue playlist on Spotify (link coming soon) and a certain song came on that just fuelled this chapter. SO, I highly recommend listening to Leave A Light On by Tom Walker if you want the vibes for this chapter. Just… honestly, please do it (I may have had tears)

As always, credit to whoever owns the gif. I usually find them on Google or Pinterest, so message me if it’s yours ♥︎

Rogue Taglist: @snipskixandbeskar @weirdowithnobeardo @the-bottom-of-the-abyss

Mando’a translation: Cabur - Protector or Guardian

A few weeks had passed since that night you saved the Mandalorian’s life, since he threw away the bounty puck to keep you safe.

You’d stayed that night grounded, and then when Mando was able to get up in the morning, he flew you off of that dump of a planet.

He didn’t ask anymore but how you had managed to save him. Whether he knew you were lying or not, he hadn’t pushed it, choosing instead to respect you. Kind of like how you respected him and his Creed.

You’d fallen into a sort of routine around the Razor Crest, without either of you realising it. Mando would fly the ship, and you could be found seeing to Grogu and Duru, or tidying things up. Sometimes you would clean the weapons in the cabinet, making sure they stayed in pristine condition.

Now and then, Mando would head out to get a bounty and when he got back, he would let you help patch him up. You never saw his bare skin, respected that. You would look away or close your eyes, pointing out the best things to use or how to administer them. The man was good at first aid, but his answer to everything was to shove the cauteriser on it. So, when you had been passing through some shops one day, you had stocked up on medical supplies, even found a shop selling the same herbs and plants that your mother had taught you about.

You’d even been on a few of the hunts with him.

Of course, you had argued first. When you’d asked him about it one day on the way out of Nevarro, Mando had simply said no.

Which had immediately riled you. You were not a girl who liked that word. You despised that word.

Which is how you’d spent the whole night and next two days bickering, over the question of your safety. When he lost that front, (“Seriously, Mando? I’m a fugitive. And after all, I’ve got a big, strong Mandalorian to protect me”) the Mandalorian had moved on to your lack of thinking before throwing yourself into the firefight.

He lost that one too.

(“Says the man who stole back a child surrounded by Stormtroopers.”

“You’re not coming. End of.”

“Did you want me to bring your pulse rifle over?”

“Are you even listening to me?”

“You’re right. Pulse rifle and an extra blaster.”

“I hate you, you know that?”

“Sure you do, Lori. I’ll see you at the ramp.”)

That nickname had slipped out by accident, and he’d regarded you, for a long time. He’d gone still, and you almost swore you heard a hitch of breath through his helmet and then he just nodded and murmured softly, “See you down there.”

There had been a lot of little moments like that but they were so fleeting that you were almost convinced you’d imagined it. You were imagining a lot of things lately.

Sometimes, when you were walking through forests or towns, you thought you spotted something lingering at the edges of your vision.

A tall figure, cloaked in a hood that was embroidered in either silver or gold, depending on the light.

You’d even asked Mando about it a few times, but he hadn’t seen anything so you simply put it down to a trick of the light or sleeplessness, nightmares still plaguing you now and then.

Regardless of the nightmares and your vision playing tricks on you, you were doing… okay. You were warm, safe, had a comfy place to sleep. You had things to keep you busy, things that weren’t hunting for food or a good spot to hunker down in for the night.

Duru was happy too, having become fast friends with Grogu and the two of them ran rings around you and the Mandalorian. Well, mainly Mando, which you found hilarious because he was such an exasperated dad with them both.

It was a rare reprieve from your life, letting you slow down and… live. Rather than survive.

“I do not talk in my sleep.”

“Yes, you do!! Sometimes, I think you’re awake but you’re just having a fully-fledged conversation with your blanket.”

“Oh, shut up. I know I don’t talk in my sleep, tin can. You were probably just having dreams about me again.” You examined the fruit in front of you, then handed over a few credits to the kind vendor, slipping the fruit in your bag.

The sound of fabric hitting the floor sounded from behind you, and you turned to see that the Mandalorian had dropped the bag you’d made him carry. “I do NOT have dreams about you!” He stooped to pick up the bag, then rose to see you standing with your hands on your hips, eyebrow raised and that damn smirk on your lips.

“Mmhm, is that why you always have to pull something over your lap when I wake you up?”

He stared at you, and you had the very correct feeling that he was looking at you in mild shock, too caught out to come up with his usual cocky response. “I -you.. That’s completely..”

You burst out laughing, rolling your eyes at him and then dropping him a wink, “Come get me when you’ve thought of a response, Lori.” You turned and carried on walking through the market.

The two of you had stopped off on a nearby trading planet, to gather supplies. Mando had recently secured a bounty with your help and it had paid well, giving you enough extra credits to stock up and treat yourselves. Grogu was already half-way through a packet of blue macarons, which would no doubt come back to bite you both later when he was pelting through the ship whilst you tried to catch him. And it would be your fault because you had taken one look at those big ears and eyes, determined not to break but when the little womp rat had cooed at you… Of course, he had gotten his own way.

It felt good, to wander a market and not be scrounging for things under the cover of a hooded cloak. You still had one on, you couldn’t bear to part with this item, the most beautiful piece of clothing you had ever had. You just didn’t have the hood up disguising you.

A gift, from Mando.

The first time you went out with him after the puck was destroyed, Mandalorian had insisted you wear yours. However, it had been covered in his blood from his injury, and you couldn’t get it out, no matter how hard you had tried. It hadn’t bothered you that much, though you were.. not sad as such, but it felt a little strange because it had been one of your few possessions for so long. But, maybe it was a symbol. That things had changed, and that was in the past.

A couple of days later, you had just walked into the cockpit when you noticed there was a package on your seat. When you picked it up, it was squishy, bound in a sort of thick papery material and tied with a length of string.

You’d glanced at the Mandalorian, who was watching you, the picture of calm but his hands had been fiddling with something on his belt, a shockingly nervous gesture you weren’t used to.

That simple, uncertain gesture had risen your pulse and you unwrapped the package, trying not to show how your hands were shaking at the first gift you’d received since being a child.

A gift from the Mandalorian.

Pulling away the paper had revealed a mass of fabric, a blue so deep it was almost the same colour as the night sky. You’d lifted it out and it had unfolded and revealed itself to be a new cloak. The material was soft, thick enough to keep out a biting chill. You’d made a noise of awe and surprise, but had immediately fallen in love with it, pulling it on. It fell to about the middle of your calves and secured at the base of your neck with a small silver clasp.

The inside was lined with a thin layer of heat-reflective material, and when you’d run a hand over it, Mando had finally broken his silence, “I noticed you were always cold, even if you had layers on so I.. wanted to make sure you weren’t cold anymore..”

You swore you could almost feel the heat creeping up his neck, and that softened you. He was nervous about giving you this cloak, like he didn’t know how you would take it.

You had smiled at him, a soft smile that made your eyes glitter like the surrounding stars and placed a hand on his knee lightly, “Thank you, Lori. I adore it, I truly do.” Then you’d spent the next minutes admiring it, putting the hood up and realising it shielded your face in shadow.

So, naturally, you had moved around the cockpit and upper level like a phantom, pretending to be a shadow in the night.

You’d even earned yourself a laugh from the great wall of beskar that was fast becoming your friend. It was only a soft chuckle, just picked up by the vocoder, but all the same, it had lit something within you.

It still echoed in your ears now.

A few moments later, the Mandalorian was back at your side, Grogu in his little bag and Duru walking next to him. “The point still stands. I thought I might finally get some silence at night, but you talk just as much.” His raspy voice had a softened edge, one of teasing and you might even have heard the hints of a smile playing at his lips.

You turned to look at him over your shoulder, “You love it when I talk. I have to talk to you, otherwise I’d be worried you had turned to stone. You’re so quiet sometimes.” You stopped at a stall, admiring the fabrics here – not to buy, just to look at the different things in a place you had never seen before.

The Mandalorian made a soft noise, “No, sweetheart, that’s just called quiet time. You might want to try it sometime.”

You opened your mouth to speak, but something behind Mando caught your eye. Rising up on tiptoe, you peered over his shoulder… but there was nothing there. Weird. You could have sworn you saw someone wearing a hood just… watching you.

You shrugged, assuming you had imagined it like before and then looked back to the man before you, “I can be quiet. I just choose to fill your hours with my wonderful voice.” You flashed him a grin, eyes dancing.

A voice cut across before Mando could talk to you, “You.” It was a snarl, tinged with recognition that wasn’t exactly the most positive. It was bitter, aggressive and almost… pained.

Mando turned quickly, his hand flying toward the blaster on his hip, instinct overriding him. His movement allowed you to see who had just interrupted the conversation.

A lady stood there, with curly magenta hair twisted up into a braid. She had tattoos along her neck, and her eyes were a shocking green. She was breathing quickly, staring at you with such disdain that it made your neck prickle.

How did you know this woman? You’d never been to this planet before.

You blinked, holding up your hands as a surrender gesture, “Uh… I’m sorry but I don’t know you. I think you must have me confused with someone else…”

The lady shook her head fiercely, making the whisps of her hair that had escaped bounce wildly. “No. I do not have you confused. I would know you anywhere.” Her eyes were wild with fury, pinning you to the ground with just a stare.

“I’m sorry, but I really don’t know who you are. Maybe you could tell me your name?” You extended a hand, trying to diffuse this situation and help the woman understand that you aren’t who she thinks.

She flinched back from your reach, even though she was still a good few feet away. “How dare you. You don’t even know who I am?” She made a noise of disgust, looking you up and down in such a way that you were surprised the skin didn’t flay from your bones, “Typical. I don’t know why I’m surprised. She was probably just another tool to you, wasn’t she? Another person to use and discard like trash.”

You blinked, your hands dropping to your sides. Your skin began to tighten, your blood turning a little frosty. You looked to the side, seeing a few people start to stop and watch this altercation happen.

The Mandalorian seemed to pick up on this at the same time as you. He turned more toward the lady, his hand still within reach of his blaster, “Why don’t we take this somewhere more private?”

The woman barely even looked at him, “Don’t get involved in this, Mandalorian. You’re just as bad as she is. At least to do what you do, you have to have respect and creed. You have morals, no matter how murky they are.” She jabbed a finger at you, “Unlike this savage monster.”

Your breathing immediately shallowed, getting a little unsteady as she spat out that word, that hateful word that followed you around and hounded at your feet. “I’m sorry? For whatever I’ve done, I’m sorry if it’s hurt you. I didn’t mean it, truly-”

She laughed, a cold and cruel laugh, but her eyes were slowly turning glassy with tears. She took a few steps closer, “You don’t even remember her name, do you? Shall I remind you? Help you distinguish her from your kill list?”

You didn’t fail to notice the way the Mandalorian’s stance shifted. His body tightened and he stood closer, shielding you slightly with one of those ridiculously broad shoulders. He was going on the defensive, feeling the situation start to spiral.

The woman barely spared him another glance, “3 years ago, you showed up on Trask. You stumbled around the market for a few days, bleeding from a wound in your leg and you passed out.”

Realisation was beginning to filter through you. It sparked in your mind and you remembered a dark street and rain, your leg heavy and cumbersome beneath you. It had burned like fire and when you went down, you couldn’t get back up again.

The woman was still talking, “Someone picked you up, took you to their home. My sister. She was there for work, and saw you lying in the street, like some kind of dumped animal. She nursed you back to health, gave you somewhere to stay.” She could see it as it began back to you, “You took her aid, her comfort and then, there was a warning put out in the village. There had been a high-risk fugitive spotted in the village. Anyone with information was to come forward immediately.”

Your hands curled into fists, your chest shuddering as guilt and darkness began to swirl within you, “Stop.”

She chose not to hear your quiet plea, “I was supposed to meet her. But she sent me a comms message. She would meet me, but she would have someone else with her. Someone who she couldn’t tell me over a comms message. Someone in trouble. People said this girl was dangerous, to be handed over with no hesitation but she didn’t see that. No, she said this girl was terrified, that she just wanted to live.” She tilted her head, walking closer again, “But the next day, this special little girl was gone. And then the Imperials came.” Her voice shook, her expression unreadable.

You shook your head mutely, not wanting to hear this, memories flooding your brain.

“Someone had tipped them off that my sister was harbouring a fugitive. They tore through her home, destroyed it and dragged her in for questioning. They demanded she tell them, beat her when she denied it. She never gave it up.”

The woman was right in front of the Mandalorian now, who extended his arm out, ‘That’s close enough.”

Nausea roiled your stomach, and you weren’t sure if you were going to pass out or throw up. There were too many eyes on you, too many people watching as this woman revealed you bit by bit.

The woman lowered her voice, deadly soft and it shook, but carried in the silent square, “My sister was murdered because of you. Because of what you are.”

Mando froze, his head tilting back to look at you slightly. You still hadn’t told him.

She wasn’t done. “They told me a few weeks ago that you’d been captured by a Mandalorian. I wept with relief that day, because I knew the Mandalorian wouldn’t fail. You’d be taken to whoever wanted you, and you would finally repent for every single sin you’ve ever committed. Your life is littered with them. My sister, my beloved sister is dead because of you. A killer. A beast. Your hands are stained red, girl, and they will always be stained red. I admit, I’m disappointed that you slithered into his head with your poison too but you will kill him too and then… You deserve everything that will ever come to you. And more.” The woman was breathing almost as quickly as you, her eyes glinting in sick delight at the pain she was causing you.

My sister is dead because of you.

A beast.

Her words mingled with that seductively dark voice in your mind and you gasped for a breath, knives feeling like they were digging into your lungs. Your eyes darted around, noted the strangers looking at you with horror and that shared disgust. A father pushed his daughter behind his legs as he caught your stare, hissing at you.

A flinch ran down your body and without a second thought, you turned tail and bolted. The sunlight was too bright, obscuring your vision harshly and making you stumble every now and then.

You were distantly aware of a male’s shout, then a harsh thumb and the Mandalorian’s voice snarling, “Stay down.” He stopped to check your pursuer was down and then he was running after you. “Hey, wait.”

You ignored him, boots pounding into the dust as you ran through the market, needing to get out of this place, get away from her and the memories. Where the hell was the ship? It was right here a minute ago. I haven’t gone the wrong way. This is the way we came.

You could still hear Mando behind you, knew he was hot on your heels. “Drop it, Mando.” You led him around people and stalls, knowing if wanted to be in front of you, he would be. He was letting you flee, stopping anyone coming after you.

Dodging around a crate of fruit, you almost sobbed. There it was, the Crest, gleaming in the sunlight. You slowed down as you reached it, stopping a little way away to let the ramp come down, let you inside to sanctuary.

Nothing happened.

Bastard.

You took a breath, trying to get past the tightness in your lungs, “Let me in.”

“No. Not until you tell me what’s going on.” His voice was firm, arrogant, in a way like he knew best and you’d listen to him.

~“A killer. A beast. Your hands are stained red.”~

Your hands curled into fists at your sides, staring at the Crest, at where the ramp was tucked in tight. Your heart was pounding, not from the run, but from the realisation that no matter where you went, there would always be someone you had touched with that curse. “No. I’m not telling you anything. I don’t owe you anything.”

He laughed behind you, but it was a cool laugh, nothing humorous in it, “I’m not saying you owe me anything, princess. But some woman just cornered you in the street and spat abuse at you. I thought I would be prying you off of her, not chasing after you.”

A wolf. No. A beast.

You spun round, eyebrow raised, “Because I’m some wild animal that would rather fight than talk my way out of a situation?”

If he had no helmet, you would have seen him blink, “No, I’m not saying that. But, well. You have to admit it, don’t you?”

Something was beginning to prickle up the back of your neck, his words threatening to cut a little close, “Admit what?” Venom laced your tone and you tensed, as if bracing for a punch.

The Mandalorian walked closer, oozing confidence like he somehow knew you better than you knew yourself, “You don’t really think, do you? You never calculate the risks of a fight. You just jump straight in with no regard for your own safety. I mean, when I came for you on Sorgan, anyone smart would have seen a Mandalorian and run.” He wasn’t saying it in an arrogant way, he was saying it as fact. And he was right. A Mandalorian appeared on the street and you turned around and crossed to the other side. You didn’t engage him a fight and flirt with him.

A cold laugh rocked though you and you tilted your head, “Anyone smart? So you’re calling me stupid now? Is that it? Beast or stupid?” You took a few steps closer to him, ignoring the villagers milling around that had started to look, having heard the fight in the centre of the market. “Don’t you dare tell me I don’t calculate risks. You think I’ve had time to calculate risks in my life? I don’t have time to sit with my little notepad in my ship and jot down the pro’s and con’s of engaging in battle. I didn’t have the luxury of being trained like you.”

Bitter astonishment filled the Mandalorian’s voice, his own body going rigid, “The luxury of training?! You think I chose to become a Mandalorian? That I woke up one morning and skipped along to Mandalorian school?” His voice rose, the rough rasp turning to stone with every word.

You observed him with a steely gaze, something in you needing to push him away, to protect yourself before he got too close. So, you aimed for what you knew would work, his Creed. Your eyebrows rose, looking him up and down as you leaned your weight on one leg, “You’re telling me you weren’t born with that thing already stuck on your head?” Spiteful sarcasm dripped from your voice and you pointed up at his helmet.

The Mandalorian let out a snarl that no doubt usually sent normal people running. He stalked toward you with predatory grace, a hunter toward his prey. “Don’t you dare.” Like he read in your eyes where you were going with this.

Ugly triumph filtered though you as you stood your ground, not afraid of him, “It’s all the same with you Mandalorians, isn’t it. You have all your training, don your shiny armour and suddenly you’re better than anyone. That helmet goes on, you don’t have to face the consequences of what you’ve done. No one knows who you are, so you don’t need to take the blame.” These words were spiteful, beyond cruel and you hated yourself more and more for each one, but he was starting to get into the cracks, starting to see you. You couldn’t see him die.

Mando was right in front of you now, towering above you with all his broad-shouldered posture, frustration roiling off of him in waves. “You think I don’t feel remorse for what I’ve done?” His voice was so low, barely leashed.

You nearly purred, tasting the promise of a fight, even if it did twist a knife into your heart. “I’ve never seen it.” You tilted your head back to look up at him, letting every ounce of spoilt, cruel brattiness melt into your expression.

A soft growl rumbled through the helmet, so muted you barely heard it in the noises of the market behind him.

Yes. Yes.

And then he relaxed, his shoulders eased and his hands uncurled.

What? No – Disappointment, maybe even shock registered on your expression. You’d been sure, so sure that aiming for his beloved Creed would get him to fight you. Why hadn’t it worked?

Mando shook his head, the sunlight bouncing off of the shiny metal, “No. I’m not doing this with you. You can’t push me away, no matter how hard you try. You don’t mean anything that you just said, I can see it in your eyes.” He pressed a button on his vambrace, and the ramp opened behind you.

He saw you.

That dark beast was starting to awaken, its ears pricking up. You needed to get out of here, away from him, away from this, now. You just shook your head, turning around and walking up the ramp, watching Duru as she ran ahead of you.

Footsteps sounded from behind you as the Mandalorian followed you. He took Grogu from his little pouch, popping him on a cargo crate and Duru immediately jumped up next to him. “Don’t walk away from me. I’m trying to help you, but you keep shutting me out. Why did that woman say those things about you?” His gloved hand enveloped your wrist, his grip not tight or authoritative, but it began to break something in you.

“Let me go, Mando. I mean it.” You let ice creep into your tone, trying to disguise the cracking inside you, the darkness that was beginning to stir and whisper.

And the damn tin can saw it all. Your back was to him, but he still fucking knew, “Please… You know I would never judge you for it, for whatever you did to make her say that.”

Excuse me?

Anger flared through you now, igniting into a blaze and you snarled, “Whatever I did?!” You didn’t give him time to respond, not before you swung around, using his grip on your wrist for leverage. You had spent enough time around him now to become familiar with the plates of his armour, so you knew you aimed correctly when your fist connected with the side of his ribs between the front and back plates.

He grunted, jolting a little but he still didn’t let go. “Hey, I didn’t mean it like that. I only meant-” His voice had softened and, in your rage and hurt, you mistook the pleading tone for a condescending one.

Before he could finish, you punched him again, harder, “Don’t. Don’t try to start spewing excuses at me. I knew perfectly well what you meant. You thought that she had been hurt by me. That I killed her sister with my own hands. Probably slit her throat and bathed in her blood.”

“No, no, I didn’t. If you would just listen to me and stop shouting, please-“

Your foot connected with his shin, making him stumble backwards. You followed after him, “You didn’t even stop to think that maybe, for once, I didn’t actually do anything. But no. Like always, you looked at me and saw the worst. You assumed that I was a monster.” You chopped down at his inner elbow this time, causing him to let go of you in reflex.

Mando tilted his head, his voice coming out sharper this time, “I assumed?” He laughed, the bastard laughed, “What else am I supposed to do, sweetheart? You’ve been on this ship for nearly a month now and I still don’t know anything about you. So yes, I was wrong for assuming, but can you blame me?”

Your eyes flashed and you were on him again, “So it’s my fault that you thought I was a monster? You’d met me for all of two seconds on Sorgan and started whispering in my ear like honey, that death followed me wherever I went. There was a bounty over my head and that’s all you saw.”

Mando went still, his shoulders tightened, and his voice came out lower, “You’re still bringing that up? I told you that you weren’t my bounty anymore.”

Before you could answer him, that velvety voice inside your head started to whisper in your ear, “Oh no, oh my sweet darling. He sees you. The real you. He knows you’re a monster.”

You shook your head sharply, lifted your eyes back to the Mandalorian’s stupid face. Helmet. Visor. Whatever. “I’m not your bounty but you believed that woman. So say it.”

His confusion was palpable, “Say what?”

You took a step forward and your chest butted up against his, “Say it! Say that I’m a monster. A murderer. I kill everything I come near.” You laughed, coldly, the words coming out with your voice but in your head, they were being repeated in that cruel, silken whisper. “You regret it, don’t you? Throwing away my puck. You wish you’d kept it, then you could get rid of me, be free of what I’ve done, why I’m being hunted.” Those steel bands were still wrapped round you, crushing you, swallowing you whole again.

Something broke in him, his composure as the anger rose again and he leaned down to you, “Stop.” The command was a growl and he lifted a finger, pointing at you, “You’re a fucking hypocrite.”

Yes. Yes, fight back, fight me. Tell me what I know I am.

You raised your eyebrows, smirking at his finger and then back up at him but your expression was bitter, “Am I? Why’s that, Mando?” You tilted your head and practically purred, “Tell me.”

The tension in the room was tight, the air almost crackling around you with this outburst of emotion, the threads of your entwined lives pulling taut.

The light bounced off of the plates on his shoulders, betraying his slightly ragged breathing, “You just screamed at me for assuming the worst about you, yet you did just that to me. How can I want to be free of you, when I don’t even know who you are.” He lifted his hands to your shoulders, to try and calm you down, to push you away maybe.

The smirk began to slip from your face, “Does it matter who I am?”

His grip tightened, “Of course it does. Because you’re not a bad person. Let me help you, please. Just tell me something. Anything.” His voice turned pleading, and he lifted a hand from your shoulder, like he was going to cup your cheek.

You’re not a bad person.

Fire blazed within you again, protective and destructive. This was too close. He was getting too close. You had to stop it, now. You had to get away.

You reached up, grabbing his wrist and using the element of surprise to slam him against the wall behind him, pinning his wrist there and then your blade was at his neck, dull light glinting off of it, “Back off. You can’t help me. I’m not some broken doll to add to your ragtag collection.” Your own breathing was ragged, coming in sharp pants as the room started to spin.

The Mandalorian flinched, like you’d hit a nerve and his free hand moved. Bingo.

Yes, you thought, almost begged, Punch me. Fight me, please.

But he didn’t. He just curled his fingers around your wrist and pushed you away, dislodging your knife and knocking you back a few steps. Like you were weak.

You couldn’t do this, he was starting to slip through the cracks that were forming in you. He was looking at you, seeing you. He always had, from the moment you were nothing but hunter and prey, he knew exactly how to get through your intricately woven net of silver-tongued quips and cocky arrogance.

No.

Your voice cracked, echoes of the dark beast’s laughter in your ears “No! Stop pushing me away, stop taking it. Fight me!!” You surged for him again, your hands curling into fists, slamming against the beskar plates again and again.

You didn’t care that it hurt, that it made pain explode across your knuckles.

You liked it, you liked the pain. Deserved that and so much more.

And the Mandalorian… just stood there. He shook his head, just slightly, “No.” He stood there as you hammered your fists against his chest, even when you started to kick him. Just watched as your eyes became glassier, your punches harder but less accurate.

Why wasn’t he fighting you?

Your hazy mind began to overwork, searching for something, anything to provoke him, “Why? You don’t want to fight a girl? Too proud are you?” You slammed your knee into his, pulled at the armour plates, honed your pain and fury into him but he just absorbed it. “You’re as weak as I am, you’re running too. You’re the hypocrite, Mandalorian, not me.” Your words were stilted, made no sense as you spat out words as cruel as you could, just needing to provoke him.

Nothing did. Nothing. There was no noise in the cargo hold but the sounds of the people outside, beeping, the dull thud of your fists, your spiteful words and your own ragged breathing.

And the whispering in your head that had turned into a full-on symphony of bitter taunts and sniping truths. It rose with memories, flashes of your dead parents, the battered bodies of those that had tried to help you, people who had been caught in the cross-hairs of your life. Innocent people that had turned into nothing more than collateral damage.

Blood had started to smear on the beskar, your knuckles splitting open with the repeated impact. You could hear Duru meowing, Grogu gurgling in worry but you didn’t care.

The beast and its army rose, tasting the scent of blood and bringing you visions of the future, of the Mandalorian, dead on the ground. The blood from your fists turned into his own, painting the ground red. Duru, fur soaked in scarlet and Grogu, his tiny little body broken on the floor in a pool.

And above them, you stood, soaked in the blood of these three. Relishing in the pain and torture that you had caused. You could taste their blood.

The room began to spin further, the whispering detonated into a roar and it unleashed a heavy roiling cloud within you. It choked you, squeezed fists around your lungs, clouded your eyes and snuck into your head. It whispered to you, such cruel taunts, sucking out the deepest, most vile thoughts you had about yourself and spat them back out, combined with these visions of the future. It leeched the energy out of you and with a choked sob, your knees gave way.

Duru let out a yowl of concern, springing off of the cargo box.

I can’t do this anymore. I can’t be confident, or strong. I can’t be brave and cocky, I can’t keep throwing myself into every fight, I can’t run anymore. I can’t do this. I can’t-

And then a pair arms caught you.

Mando caught you. He didn’t haul you up against him. He didn’t try and pull you up.

No, he sunk to the floor with you, supporting your weight in his own body, leaning against the wall and letting you collapse against him.

You froze, your body stiffened as he did. This… people didn’t touch you like this. They didn’t put their arms around you unless they were trying to drag you somewhere.

You hadn’t been hugged since you were a child, and yet here you were. The Mandalorian was holding you, but loosely.

Waiting, for your consent. For you to be okay with this.

And as his gloved hand brushed your back, such a tender warmth broke through you, caressed your pain and you couldn’t resist. You sunk into him, the last saps of energy leaving you as tears flooded your cheeks. The armour was hard, digging into you a little bit, but the feeling of just being held was more than enough.

He wrapped his arms around you, coaxing you against his chest. His legs were either side of you, one stretched out on the floor and the other resting up to support your back. Distantly, you were aware of four clawed feet padding over your lap, Duru settling into the space between you and Mando’s arm.

The armour disguised the frantic beating of his heart, your tears and shaking of your body held the trembling of his own hands, but he didn’t mention it. Didn’t mention the fact that this was the first time he had held someone like this that wasn’t the kid… since he was a child himself. He was just as starved of touch as you, even more so because he had no skin-to-skin contact either. He could feel your warmth through the fabric of his clothes that weren’t covered, could feel the weight of you leaning into him.

He didn’t speak, just held you in the dimness of the cargo hold, keeping you together as you fell apart, kept the promise of death away, just as you had done for him.

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#the mandalorian x force sensitive! reader #the mandalorian x reader #the mandalorian x you #din djarin x force sensitive! reader #din djarin x reader #din djarin x you #reader insert #star wars #the mandalorian #pedro pascal #grogu

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planetsano · 4 years

Text

push and pull.

prompt: bakugou has been neglecting the reader because of work. she can't handle that because all she wants is love and attention.

warning(s): ceo!au, major sugar daddy vibes, aged up, hurt/comfort, f!reader, softie baku at the end.

pairing(s): bakugou katsuki x reader

You definitely felt like a spoiled brat. Walking around the Gucci store with a pout displayed on your glossed lips and nose held high like nothing in the vicinity was even close to being decent enough for you. Heels clicking lightly against the marbled flooring as you wandered around. This was such a drag. Your manicured finger lazily traced a handbag on a display table, it was probably worth someone's salary but you weren't interested. Your eyes were locked on the handsome blonde man pacing back and forth outside the big glass windows of the store. He was angrily speaking into the phone stopping ever so often to insult whoever was on the receiving end.

That— that stupid jerk is Bakugou Katsuki, your boyfriend, and he pinky promised to spend the day with you uninterrupted. Meaning no work calls, no emails, no boring paperwork— just you and him spending time together. He even promised to buy you that new handbag and the matching shoes you’ve been absolutely dying for but here you were in your current situation.

Recently, Bakugou has been incredibly busy with work but you couldn't exactly blame him. He was the CEO of a very successful multi-billion dollar company. But these past few weeks felt like you could never catch him not answering a business call or typing some boring email. Attempting to get one kiss from him always led you to be met with a dismissive wave of the hand as he answered the call. You knew it wasn't wise to bother him any further because he did have a temper. You’ve seen countless people on the receiving end of his rage and you didn't want to be met with it. Though it was sexy at times, you never liked upsetting him so you just left him alone. Always feeling deflated and discouraged as you opened up a tub of your favorite ice cream. Stress eating. This happened on multiple instances over the course of nearly a month. Quite frankly, you felt unwanted and it was driving you mad.

Walking around this store, there were so many beautiful and luxurious things, but your heart wasn't in it. Shopping wasn't much fun without his hand in yours giving you his opinions about how a dress or shoes would look on you, helping you zip up your dresses and sneaking naughty makeout sessions in the dressing room. Don't worry, you knew you looked pathetic. All pouty and woe as me. My rich boyfriend isn't giving me attention, life is so tough… you could laugh at yourself right now.

You missed him a lot but you were understanding… as understanding as you could be. You wondered if it was selfish to feel this nasty feeling pooling in your chest and stomach. Was it selfish to feel.. neglected? Was it selfish to want to have him all to yourself for just a day?

Was he.. losing interest in you? Was there someone else? Surely work couldn't take up that much of his time.. Did you upset him recently and didn't realize? Feelings of anxiety and nausea started to bubble up within you.. You didn't feel well at all and started to get sick to your stomach the more you got caught up in your thoughts. You wanted to leave. Now.

You hastily exited the store to find Bakugou. It looked like he was just about to come back in to find you, but you stopped him in his tracks. Almost immediately he noticed how drained you looked. Like there was something bothering you. He thought maybe some had said something rude to you but before he could react you spoke.

“Baby, can we go home? I don't feel good..” You looked up at him with a frown, your dainty hand resting on his chest.

The car ride back was quiet. Bakugou noticed your sudden change in demeanor causing him to take more than a couple glances at you in the passenger seat. Usually you'd be so bright and talkative, ushering him to sing along to whatever shitty song you had playing but you were radio silent. Maybe you actually didn't feel good? He would make ure to have his assistant buy you some medicine.

Men are so clueless..

“You ready?”

Your eyes averted their attention from your reflection to the handsome blonde casually adjusting his cufflinks behind you. He looked absolutely stunning standing there in an all black suit accompanied with a red tie. It not only complimented his eyes beautifully, but it matched your sparkly red gown as well. It almost pissed you off how he could be doing the bare minimum and still manage to look that good. But now wasn't the time to oogle. You came up with the conclusion that if he wanted to neglect you then you’d give him a dose of his own medicine. You ignored his presence and picked up your favorite highlighter and a brush, dusting your collarbones lightly to make them pop.

Bakugou walked a few steps closer and you continued to focus on your reflection in the mirror. He leaned over to plant a single kiss on the end of your shoulder, then made a trail of light and soft kisses along your shoulder blade, to the base of your neck and finally to that sensitive part of skin just below your earlobe. It took everything in you, plus more not to give in to his affections, but you desperately wanted to melt under him. You were so incredibly touch starved, especially these days. You missed him, but at the same time you were so upset with him. You couldn't just give in the moment he realizes you exist again. Fuck him. You were supposed to be angry. Not needy.

“You look fuckin’ amazing..” His voice was deep as he whispered into your ear. You closed your eyes tightly and sighed deeply, quickly getting up from your vanity stool and brushed past him, not even looking in his direction. You didn't get far before Bakugou grabbed your wrist and pulled back towards him fully closing the gap between you two and secured an arm around your waist making sure you weren't going anywhere.

God, you could feel him staring a hole into your head as you looked off to the side avoiding eye contact at all costs. You just couldn't bring yourself to look him in the eyes. You’d break.

Bakugou grabbed your face with his free hand forcing you to look at him, temporarily squishing your cheeks and making your lips go into a kissable pout. His harsh crimson gaze was locked onto your doe like eyes making you feel incredibly vulnerable and shy. You hated the power he had over you. Something as simple as eye contact making your ears and cheeks flare up in the color red. The thoughts and emotions from earlier coming back all at once threatening to make you sick all over again.

“What the fuck is your problem?” He asked bluntly, eyebrows furrowed in confusion and irritation from your behavior. He could see something was bothering you and it was pissing him off that you weren't talking to him.

“Nothing.. I promise..” You replied. “I'm happy! See?” You forced a smile on your face as Bakugou watched your bottom lip quiver and eyes water as you tried to pathetically convince him you were fine all while looking like a kicked puppy.

“You’re a shit liar. You're about to fucking cry.” Bakugou’s hand shifted to cup the side of your face. You leaned into the warmth of his hand

“Tell me what's wrong.” His voice was still blunt and expression still stern. He never wants to see you like this. Sure, you got upset or even bratty from time to time but he's never seen you in this state and it worried the fuck out of him.

“I-I.. I just-!” You struggled to find proper words to convey how you felt. His thumb rubbed your cheek gently somewhat calming you down and keeping you from hyperventilating.

“Breathe.” His voice and expression softened upon seeing you teary and vulnerable.

“I just miss you!” You blurted out. Bakugou looked down at you with his brows furrowed in confusion.

“You're so busy with work you seem to forget I exist, I don't say anything because I-I’m proud of you and I want you to be successful! I understand you're very busy but.. but is it too much to ask for thirty minutes of your time? Katsuki, I miss spending time with you-” Bakugou watched you pour out all your emotions and thoughts like word vomit.

Guilt hit him all at once like a fucking train seeing you crying because of him. He was the reason you felt like this and he wanted to punch himself in the face for not noticing how unhappy you were sooner. He did admit that work seemed to be the only thing he’s been about lately. Neglecting his love life, his friends, his family, maybe even his own health. Even holding you this close made him realize that he hasn't been.. this close in proximity to you in a while. He fucked up.

“I-Is there someone else? Is that it? My hair.. I can change it if you'd like. Do you still love me? I-” That was the final straw for him. He cut you off with a swift kiss to the lips. It surprised you but you almost immediately moved your lips into sync with his. The kiss was sloppy and too many emotions fueled it, but the most prevalent one was want.

Bakugou’s heart ached hearing your words. Of course he still loved you. Everything about you was perfect in every way, there was no way on Earth he would lose you over some random extra that probably only wanted him for his money and last name. The fact that you were so.. willing to change for him to make him happy because you were so in love seemed so... wrong. He thought that if anything he should be the one trying to make you happy. He couldn't give a fuck whether your hair was long or short, curly or straight, he loved you regardless. Your appearance was never a factor in his feelings for you. Only a bonus.

He pulled away from your lips suddenly and looked at you. Your eyes were puffy, mascara was running and your lipstick was smeared but you still looked beautiful. It was a look he particularly liked but, it was not under these circumstances. You were usually on your knees.

“Don't say stupid things like that.” Bakugou started.

“..I'm so shit at relationships..” He struggled with his words and you could see it in his face. He wasn't ever one to express how he felt.

“‘m sorry for treating you like a fucking stranger.. you know I love you. No one else could even hold a fucking candle to you, that shouldn't even be a thought in this pretty fucking head of yours.” He sighed.

“I don't fucking care about how your hair looks.. I only care about you.” He finished.

Your crying stopped at some point when he was speaking and you were only met with soft hiccups. Bakugou wiped the final few tears from your cheeks and left a kiss on your forehead.

“Stop crying over me. I'm not worth it.” He whispered against your skin. For some reason his words shocked you. Not worth it? You thought was worth all your tears plus more, what was he on about? Did he really think he wasn't good enough for you?

“You don't say stupid things like that either. You're worth all the good things in the world.” You said softly. Bakugou’s heart fluttered at your words and he almost felt himself blush. There was a comfortable silence before you spoke up again.

“Oh no,” You looked at the time. “We're going to be late to the event and I look atrocious” You looked up at him with a pout.

“Fuck it. They'll be fine without us. Those bastards are annoying as hell anyway.. Let's get dinner, yeah? You can pick where we go.” Bakugou proposed and you smiled.

“Let's go.” You stood on your tippy toes and planted a kiss on his lips.

a/n: I hope you guys enjoyed this! For only 2k+ words I feel like I took forever to write this. I just wanted it to be up to standard.. feedback would be amazing. Also, my requests are open! Thank you for 100 followers! ❤️

#bakugou katsuki x reader #bakugou katsuki #bakugou imagines #bakugou x reader #bakugou katsuki imagine #my hero academia #my hero academia x reader #my hero academia imagines #bnha #bnha x reader #bnha bakugou

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silveanna · 3 years

Text

𝙁𝙤𝙤𝙡𝙨 𝙄𝙣 𝙇𝙤𝙫𝙚

Sim Jake x Reader x Lee Heeseung

Genre: Fluff, Best friends to lovers!au

Summary: Your class went on a 4 days retreat, staying at a retreat house to do fun activities and connect with people without mobiles. Scared confessions and denying feelings, what else could go wrong?

“Welcome to St. Augustine retreat house, the boys dorms is at the east while the girls dorm is at the west. We’ll give you 30 minutes to prepare blah blah blah” your teachers voice gets in and out of your ears when your attention got hooked on the nice scenery of the place, the retreat house gives you Fantasy vibes so much. Lots of trees and flowers can be seen anywhere , it looks so refreshing. Birds chirping and the nice Sunlight hitting your skin that doesn’t seem to feel like burning at all. A perfect place to read books and spend time with your love ones.

“Miss l/n?”

You snapped back to reality and turned your gaze to your teacher, cursing under your breath when you realize you were the only one left at the entrance. “Your mind is flying to somewhere again, go to the girls dormitories and unpack. We will start the activities tomorrow”

“Right... where is it again?” You asked.

“On the west”

———

Everyone finished unpacking their stuffs and put on casual comfy clothes, you and Jake decided to meet up at the garden and take a stroll before dinner. “I wonder what kind of food they’ll serve us?” Jake initiates the conversation, kicking a rock out of his way. “I feel like, just chicken with rice and a soup” you said. Both of you went to the fountain and made a wish.

You closed your eyes, clasping your hands together. “I wish for more better things to come” and threw the penny to the fountain. You turned at jake who’s still wishing, eventually he threw his penny to the fountain like you did. “What did you wish for?” You asked him.

He smirks, “I’ll tell you if you kiss me on the lips” you playfully tried to smack his arm which he dodged, it’s happening again where Jake will flirt with you to make you blush and frustrated. You hated it. it’s makes you question if you have romantic feelings towards him or not. Most of the time you just roll your eyes at him and talk about something else. Suddenly, some tall dude wraps his arms around Jakes shoulder and messes his hair- oh it was just Heeseung. “Dinner’s ready lovebirds”

“Don’t call us that, we’re just bestfriends” you corrected him.

Heeseung glance at you and smiled, he somehow felt relieved “Sure”

Day 1

9 am, you pretty much struggled getting out of bed cause it was so comfy, you were the last one to get out of the girls dormitory. Heading at the dinning hall, you sat between Jake and Heeseung and ate breakfast together. After that, the activities started. It was held in a room, enough for a class to fit in. “It’s kinda chilly in here” you said, hugging yourself. You flinched when someone suddenly wrapped their jacket around. “Take it” Jake said, you literally need to look up to him cause he’s towering you. “Thanks, I’ll return this later”

“Okay class, as you can see we have white candles and pink candles here. Each one of you will choose a candle and give it to someone, the white candle means ‘I’m sorry’ while the pink candle means ‘thank you’ not only that it also means that you’re confessing your love to the person you’re giving it to. So to those who’ll chose pink candles better explain what they meant or else we’ll have a misunderstanding” the teacher instructed and told the class to form a line.

Everyone got their own candles and returned back to their seats, it’s finally your turn to chose and you picked the white candle. You wanted to apologize to someone sincerely since your apology before was not really done well. The teacher turned off half of the lights so that the room would look dimmer and the candles will look more noticeable, setting the atmosphere comforting. You immediately approached the person in your mind, thankfully there wasn’t anyone near him so that you can apologize better “I’m sorry if I kicked you in the face on first day of school” you handed him the white candle.

Heeseung declined it making you frown, “you almost dislocated my jaw”

“Did it tho?”

“No”

“Then I’m sorry” you said again and this time he accepts it.

You were about to walk away when you heard him call your name, he then gave you a pink candle. “I like you”

You didn’t know how to react, you don’t like him back but you also somehow feel touched. He likes you? Since when? You opened your mouth but not a word came out, Heeseung’s starting to feel nervous as he waits for your answer. “Y/n!” You heard your bestfriend’s voice and turned your head at him. Jake has this wide smile on his face that made your heart feel heavy. Has he been always this pretty when he smiles?

Jake also gave you a pink candle but what he said next is different “Thank you for being my bestfriend” he wanted to say more but Jake chose to keep his mouth closed. No, he’s still not ready yet. Now there’s two boys holding out a pink candle towards you, both waiting for your response but instead of speaking up you just accepted both of it.

———

The First day of retreat eventually ended, It was fun. Though you have to put away your shyness and talk to everyone. There were some stories told, depressing and happy stories. You didn’t know what your classmates go through. Moving on, it’s now midnight and you’re completely just staring at the ceiling while the other girls are already asleep. You sighed, no matter how hard you try you didn’t feel sleepy at all. ‘Should I go take a walk?’ You thought, ‘yeah maybe I should’

You sat up and put your slippers on, surely there’s no one patrolling outside right? And you’re just going out for a little stroll it wouldn’t hurt. You slowly twist the doorknob and opened it, careful not making any sound to wake the others up. You headed out, the cold breeze making contact with your skin, you went to the fountain and sat there. Good thing they kept the lights on, you admired the place once again. “Thank God I thought you were a white lady from afar” Jake pops out of nowhere with his pjs and sat beside you.

You got surprised by his sudden appearance but calmed down after knowing it was just your best friend, you guys mistook each other as ghost “can’t sleep?” You said.

“Mm, some boys keeps snoring so loud.. you?”

“I don’t feel sleepy” you look down and swing your legs.

Jake turns his body at you, “ok how about I sing you a song?” You haven’t actually heard him sing before, all you got was humming as he gently slams the desk and snap his fingers after, creating a nice melody. You nodded.

Jake clears his throat, “Do you know how much I feel for you?” He stares into your eyes.

“You make my heart skip a bit or two

Oh my love, you made me love you like a fool

So tell me what do I do?

To know what’s inside your mind

Everytime you look into my eyes i melt inside” he stops, you wanna complain and tell him to sing more but you just let him be. His voice is so soothing you wondered why he never sings in public or atleast when you two are alone.

“Your voice is beautiful”

Day 2

“The class president told me we’re having lunch with Roseville high!” you heard one of your girl classmate, their friend group squealed but not too loud. What’s up with Roseville high? They have a lot of good looking rich students so it’s no surprise most of your classmates are excited to share the dining hall with them. Todays activities was held short and it’s now time for lunch, you yawned. Walking along with everyone heading for the dinning hall.

It started to rain, you stopped in your tracks and looked outside, letting everyone else go past by you. There was a terrace at front, you leaned in at its railings and stick your hand out catching the raindrops with your palm. “There you are!”

“Hmm?” You pulled your hand back.

Heeseung leaned his back on the railings, putting his hands inside his pocket. “Everyone’s waiting, we can’t eat with one missing.. Actually make that two” out of nowhere he grabs your hands and and drags you with him to the dining hall, you felt tiny when almost every student darted their eyes on you when you entered the room. Your eyes automatically scans the room searching for your bestfriend. You saw him eating not really far from you with.. a girl that obviously looks like from Roseville High. You gently tapped Heeseung’s arm, successfully getting his attention you pointed at the girl that seems to be having fun talking with your bestfriend. “Who’s that?”

“Just.. some girl”

“we should join them later” Heeseung said, grabbing a tray and falls in line. You trailed behind him and and grab your own. “I think... we should let them be, they look like they’re having fun” you suggest.

———

“You didn’t give me an answer yesterday”

You got confused for a bit but then you remembered what happened yesterday, Heeseung’s sudden confession... right.

“I uhh...”

“It’s okay if—“

“I guess we can try” it’s like your mouth has a mind on its own and blurted that out. You wanted to slap yourself so bad and take it back but it already happened. And he’s smiling.

Your little moment got interrupted when Jake sat in front in of you two with a smile on his face. He turns his head and wave at the girl he was talking to earlier. Your hands balls into a fist under the table as you watch them glance at each other happily again before the girl leaves. Why does your heart feels burning suddenly. “Did you have fun?” You ask your bestfriend.

Jake raised his brows, “Yeah pretty much”

You snorted and stood up, leaving the dining hall to calm yourself down and figured out why you’re feeling like this. Jake tried to catch up on you but you immediately leave the hall and went to the girls dormitories.

Day 3,

“These were sent by your parents, you can find a place to read their letters and have some privacy. We will give you guys some time to reflect” your teacher handed the letters one by one, you got yours and went for the garden to read it. You sat on the bench and took a deep breath before opening their letter. It started out with simple greeting but as you continue to read it gets deeper and deeper you cried. It’s just simple words but they really pour their heart in it to show that they love and care for you.

You went back to the recollection room, others still hasn’t finished reading theirs and some are crying. You eyes found jake, he’s sitting in the very corner of the room and hugging his knees. You approached him, “hey” you sat beside him and put your arm around his shoulders. He put his head on your shoulder and quietly sobbed. You hummed to atleast comfort him, He wipes his tears away and fished out something out of his pocket. “I wrote you a letter too”

You were about to unsealed it when Jake grabs your hand to stop you, “but don’t read it yet until I say so”

“Ookayy?”

“You feeling better now?” You ask, he nodded.

Jake sighed and leaned against the wall, he stared on the ceiling trying to calm himself down while you look at him, scanning his features. You know he’s handsome but he got even more handsome now and not just that Jake has a great personality his future partner is lucky. Jake glance at you, you didn’t look away but instead you stared into his eyes even more, it’s sparkling. He holds your hand and rubs it with his thumb.

———

Dinner already ended, Everyone hung out outside while others went to the dorms to rest. You decided to pack your things since tomorrow will be a more busy day than the past few days, it’s the last day and there’s going to be festival held downtown tomorrow. The teacher are taking the class to join the civillians to celebrate and buy some goods to take home. Time skip, it was still early to sleep so your girl classmates sat on the floor and formed a circle sharing each other stories. Since you don’t have anything to do you joined them. They’re just asking about each others crushes and boyfriends while you space off and stare at somewhere until...

“Hey y/n! What about you? Do you have your eyes on someone?” The class president asked you.

You rub your neck “I don’t-“

“Wait wait do you guys hear something?” Everyone got quiet.

“It’s coming from outside!” suddenly everyone rushes towards the window, you were left but it was a relief. “Isn’t that Heeseung?!”

What.

You dashed towards the window where everyone else are at and forced yourself to the crowd, you eventually got in front. There was Heeseung out side strumming on a guitar (where did he get that?) while looking up at you. His smile grew even more when his eyes landed on you, he kept singing. The girls screamed and nudges you, telling you to go downstairs and meet him. You did. But as soon as you were in-front of him, Heeseung gets on one knee and gave you flower (that he probably picked out somewhere) you accepted it. He then reached for your free hand looks up to you. “Will you please let me court you?”

Oh my god, isn’t things going too fast?

“I...”

“Well what do you say?!” “Y/n say yes!” The girls screamed.

“Y-yes!” Heeseung finally gets up and hugs you tightly, you did the same. Your girl classmates cheered. “Oi oi! What’s all this commotion all about?” the teacher interrupted. They’re already wearing their pjs seems like the screaming disturbed someone. “Ah nothing.. I’m just uhm it’s nothing” Heeseung said.

“Really? Then you kids go back to your dorms and sleep, we’ll leave early for tomorrow” and after that your teacher left.

“So.. I’ll get going now, see you tomorrow” you gave him a smile you were about to leave when Heeseung gently grab your wrist and pulled you back. He gave you a peck on the cheeks and smiled. “Right I’ll see you tomorrow” he said and waved goodbye. You hold your face, hiding the redness as you go back to your dorm. The girls greeted you with a hug, cheering you up. “If my future suitor doesn’t do that to me then I don’t want him”

You lay down on your bed and faced the wall, recalling what the hell just happened. Admit it, you don’t entirely like him but why did you say yes? Sometimes you can’t even understand yourself.

Day 4, Last day

The class president woke you up telling you too prepare and that breakfast is ready. you nodded and got up. After changing into normal clothes and styling your hair you head towards the door and opened it not expecting a guest this early. “Pres told me you’re still here, let’s eat?” He didn’t even wait for your response, Heeseung drags you along with him to the dining hall. The both of you met a sleepy Jake at the entrance.

He yawns and streches his arms, he saw you and Heeseung and decided to Greet you “Good Mooorrning???” Jake enthuastic tone drops as his eyes landed to your and Heeseung’s holding hands. You realized it and took your hand back but he just holds it again. Jake tried to brush it off but he can’t help but to glance at you two while eating. Each giving you suspicious look. Jake’s the one who finished his meal first, he didn’t think twice and stood up. “hey Hee can we talk for a min? alone?”

“Sure” they both leave the dining hall, Jake lead him to the farthest place, the boys dormitories.

“Are you.. and Y/n a thing?”

Heeseung smirks, “Yeah”

“The hell’s wrong with you? You knew I liked her! I’ve been planning to confess and yet here you are just swooping her in so easily, what happened to Bro code?”

“I don’t know jake, I guess you’re just too slow” Heeseung walks forward decreasing the gap between him and Jake. He pats Jake on his shoulder “so I say you do what you want to do before I can make her entirely mine”

———

You looked at yourself once again in your pocket mirror and shoving it inside your bags front pocket after. “Alright! since everyone’s here now get on the bus and let’s head downtown” the teacher, you and your classmates cheered, excited to go downtown and shop for souvenirs/gifts and to celebrate the festival. You got on the bus and you picked the seat near at the back, you put your bag on the luggage rack and sat down after. You saw Jake, you waved at him and pointed on the seat beside you. But before he could even occupy it Heeseung preceded him and took the seat. “Hee that’s my seat”

“Did you pay for it?”

“No”

“Then go sit somewhere else”

“Ok how about we just seat at the very back so you two can seat beside me?” You suggested, they didn’t protest.

Heeseung got up, letting you out. Him and Jake both followed you. You sat at the middle, “oh it’s kinda cozy here” you said, thankfully there wasn’t any air conditioner above the seats to freeze to hell out of your head. The three of you finally settled down, good thing Jake and Heeseung didn’t bickered so you were at peace. The ride didn’t took long, you eventually arrive at the said destination and got out. The class agreed to meet at 1 pm, it’s only 8 am so you still have 5 hours to spare. After that the class went on their separate ways, and of course you went with your bestfriend also not leaving Heeseung behind.

“Lets go shopping for clothes” Heeseung Suggested.

“No we should shop for souvenirs first” Jake said, and the two boys continue to argue again. You rolled your eyes scanning the place where you at right now finding a place to go first. Your eyes trails up on the hill whereas there’s a lot of people sightseeing and taking a lots of photos on top. “Guys I think we should go there first, it looks cool!” You pointed out.

———

Time flies so fast only one hour left before you return back to the meeting place, you’re currently having lunch on a small fast food chain. Jake excused himself and went to the restroom Heeseung took this as a chance to confess something. “I.. I can’t take it anymore” he started. “All of the things that I did in these past few days, it’s all an act” he admits, causing you to look up to him and furrow your brows. “Act? What do you mean?”

“Jake has something to tell you so just play along” he said.

You got even more confused “Hee how am I going to do that when I don’t even know what’s going on?”

In the very corner of Heeseung’s eye he caught a glimpse of Jake’s figure coming to your table so he took a tissue and wipes your mouth pretending that there’s something in there. He crumpled the tissue and dropped it on the table, he then looks at Jake who’s now sitting beside you and giving Heeseung death glares secretly. He smirks. “Okay That’s it” Jake finally decided to man up, he turned his head at you and holds your hand.

“Y/n I need to talk to you”

“I-whoa okay!” You said, Jake didn’t waste anytime and drags you out of the fast food chain. You glance back at Heeseung giving him What’s-going-on?! Look but the boy just waves at you.

After you disappeared in sight, Heeseung rest his head on his palm. He did like you, but after he went at your dorms to serenade you. He saw a big difference of how you felt between him Jake, he couldn’t make you blush and flustered like him and that’s when he knew he didn’t stood a chance in the first place. And the only thing to escape or deny that he in fact have also fallen in love with you too is to show you that it was all an just act, to make Jake feel jealous all this time so he can man up and tells you how really feels.

Jake took a deep breath before speaking up actually he took a lot of deep breaths trying to calm his heart down, “Jake you good?”

“Listen I, I like you okay? Wait no scratch that I love you. I don’t know when and where it started it just it happened and I thought it was just a silly old crush but no it starts to grow big I couldn’t- It won’t go away anymore. I’ve never felt this way in my past flings only you made feel so complicated understanding what I feel which is love, you’re the best person I’ve ever meet so will you please choose me and not him?” Jake confesses leaving you speechless. You felt your worlds collide.

So this is what Heeseung meant earlier? You were relieved it was all an act because you can’t like him back the way he wants you to, the reason why you agreed to him to court you was, you got too pressured on answering him so all you did was to say yes.

“I also feel the same way but what about the girl from Roseville high?” you tuck your hair behind your ear.

“What about her? she’s just my cousin” he explained.

“Didn’t Heeseung told you that?” Jake asked, you shook your head in response.

“That prick” he whispered.

“What?”

“Nothing, lets go back?” He offered his hand, you nodded and smiled. The both of you got back inside again while holding each others hands.

#enhypen x reader #enhypenfluff #enhypen imagines #enhypen #enhypen scenarios

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jenomark · 4 years

Text

SEPTEMBER

➔Pairing: Doyoung x Reader (Female) | Jaehyun x Reader (Female) ➔Other Members/ Characters: -.- ➔Genre: Plot (ft. smut, romance, angst, fluff etc.) ➔Warnings: Angst, Cursing, Arguments, Sexual imagery ➔Word count: 4,408

➔Summary: You are dating handsome and lovable Jaehyun. You stay at his apartment all of the time, along with his roommate Doyoung. Doyoung has feelings for you, which he doesn’t quite understand. What begins as an innocent crush changes the lives of all three people over the course of seven months.

P1: AUGUST

The bathroom was one of the few places Doyoung felt like he could relax. Once the door closed, he didn’t have to answer phone calls, didn’t have to keep his head too high from his shoulders, a puppet on strings ready to do a dance for the people around him. The only thing he needed to worry about was whether he had good reading material for the toilet, or if his phone was fully charged enough to play the music that sometimes kept him going. When he was in the bathroom, Jaehyun knew to give him his space, and all felt right in his world.

As soon as Doyoung let the door close with a soft click, his shoulders began to sink a little. He breathed a sigh of relief and hung his towel on the metal bar attached to the wall. The space on the bar was getting a little too crowded with three towels, but he ignored it. He wiggled his toes on the plush carpet placed in front of the bathtub and did a little jig all the way to the mirror above the sink, where he raised his eyebrows at his reflection.

“Handsome guy,” he said.

Doyoung smoothed the sides of his hair and smoldered at the mirror. Any foolish feeling couldn’t reach him when he was feeling himself. He turned around to face the tiled wall before whipping back to his reflection, fingers making finger gun motions, and lips pursed.

“Sexy.” he growled.

Doyoung removed his shirt and checked his body for lumps and bumps. His pale skin was smooth and unmarked. He brushed his fingers against his erect nipples and moved them over the ridges of his stomach. The abs were courtesy of his new workout regimen from the summer, but the confidence was courtesy of the new girl he’d been dating since the tail end of August. He cracked his neck and looked at the body that couldn’t wait to be touched by her.

It was easy to get lost in the daydream when he was alone. He replayed their dates from the last few weeks in his head. She seemed genuinely interested in what he had to say, her small lips always parted like she was getting ready to comment on all of his stories with praise. She was pretty, calm, and more interesting than other women he’d met on dating apps. He knew the intimacy part would follow eventually, but his impatience was running thin. There was only so many times he could imagine her here with him, bent over the tub to turn the water on, her lips begging him for the shower sex he thought would blow his mind. If Jaehyun had sex in the shower, so would he.

Doyoung removed his bottoms until he was naked. He never thought he was really that handsome, never meant the mantras he would speak to himself when no one could hear him. They helped. He began to feel shy standing in the fluorescent lighting, so he looked away from his reflection and focused on the music. Mellow vibes that would soothe him played around the bathroom. He closed his eyes and felt the notes breathing new life into him. He sang a little bit, his voice sounding beautiful. He never told anyone he could sing, and he never sang in front of anyone ever. Mostly because he was scared they wouldn’t take him seriously if they knew. Doyoung’s job was to be intelligent and available at the office, not to dream about standing on a stage, with passion falling from his fingertips every time he touched a keyboard.

Peeling back the shower curtain, he kept himself light on his toes. An impromptu naked dance party isn’t really what he needed, but his legs were itching to dance. With his luck, he would trip over the porcelain and fall into the shower curtain, breaking a bone or two in the process. Doyoung stopped the beginning shake of his knees and started the water. He felt good, almost too good. When things felt too good, it worried him.

Stepping in, the spray was perfect. Not too cold, not too warm. He washed his face roughly and wet his hair. He thought of something he wanted to bring up to Jaehyun. He imagined the conversation he would have in his head, reciting all the right words that would help him come across as assertive and authoritative. He wondered if everyone had imaginary conversations with themselves in the shower.

“I need to talk to you,” Doyoung said quietly, breathing life into his imaginary conversation. “It’s important. No, I’m not angry with you. I’m an adult, and adults talk about their feelings. We’re friends, Jaehyun. Aren’t we?”

Doyoung rubbed the water from his eyes and looked for his body wash. Usually, it sat at the edge of the tub in a sleek black bottle. He looked at all corners of the shower and tried to remember if he had used it up. Doyoung pulled back the shower curtain and looked in the bathroom trash to see his body wash face down in the basket, its sides squeezed to death. He cursed your name, because you were the only person who could have used it.

You’re being judgemental, Doyoung, he thought to himself. It could have been Jaehyun.

Doyoung looked down at his temporary body wash options. There was nothing but floral washes in pink bottles that belonged to you. He picked one up, opening the lid to smell it. Your smell was everywhere, so Doyoung quickly shut the bottle and set it back down. He was tired of the scent, tired of the way it walked him across his apartment as if he couldn’t be left on his own. He closed his eyes and tried to breathe until the smell was all gone.

“No,” he said. “We’re not doing this.”

But there was no other choice. He picked up the bottle again, poured some onto his sponge and wiped himself down with it. As he worked each part of his body, he could feel himself getting aroused. Typical. He put his hand against the shower wall and placed his forehead against it. It had been a month since you gave him That Look. He had finally gotten around to forgetting it and letting you go. It was inappropriate for him to have any feelings at all about his roommate's girlfriend, and it was definitely inappropriate for him to believe you looked at him for one sweet moment, just as he had looked at you.

Doyoung turned away from the shower spray so that he wouldn’t have to face any of your toiletries. He stared at the wall, trying to clear his mind until it was blank. He tried not to imagine you pressed up against the wet, slippery tile, but he couldn’t help it. It was like you were right in front of him, your hair in a messy bun, the tips of the hair in front of your face wet and sticking to your cheek.

“Do you want me?” imaginary you asked. “Do you want me against this wall? Maybe bent over the sink? Just be honest with me, Doyoung. Where do you want me most?”

Doyoung looked down at the water hitting his feet. When he looked back up, you were patiently waiting for an answer. You were naked, but he wouldn’t look at you, out of respect.

“No,” he said. “I’d just like to wash your hair. I’d like you to hug me underneath the water, your hands around my middle, and your head against my back.”

Doyoung turned around once again. His imagination was really making him seem crazy. He rinsed his body and let the water hit the top of his head and cascade down his face. The heat felt nice on his skin. His bones were aching from work, but they seemed to ease for a moment as he stood underneath the spray. Then, as if a sudden switch went off that controlled his life, the water started turning freezing cold.

“Ahhhh,” Doyoung screamed, moving to the far end of the shower, his own very real body pressed up against the tile. “Turn the water off! Turn it off!”

He was reacting like a baby, he knew, but Doyoung hated the cold. He tried reaching to turn the water off but he couldn’t do it. Instead, he yanked the curtain open and stepped onto the rug, his soaking wet body dripping over everything. The song ended, the next song taking forever to start. As he pulled the towel around his waist, he could begin to feel his anger bubbling up and over. Jaehyun knew not to run the water, which means there was only one culprit: You.

Feeling like it was too late to calm himself down, he swung the bathroom door open. The handle was slippery wet from his fingers. He ignored the soggy footprints he left on the floor as he trudged forward, his eyes darting around the room to find your eyes. It didn’t take long for him to find you, because as soon as Doyoung looked up, you were there, with your hand on the sink nozzle and your eyes glaring at him.

“How much longer are you going to be?” you asked. “I have a job interview, and I need the shower. I told you a few days ago I needed the shower at this specific time. Do you care about other people, or do you only care about yourself?”

Doyoung stood in the middle of the floor, all words leaving him. He was so prepared in the shower, but being in front of someone always made the right words escape him. He could feel himself about to blow, and he tried to take real breaths, but the way you nonchalantly stared at him pissed him off. You were right and he was wrong. You turned the sink off and crossed your arms against your chest. He felt like he was being scolded by his teacher, and in a way he didn’t like, it was kind of turning him on.

“Where is Jaehyun?” Doyoung asked.

You shrugged. “Where are your clothes?”

As if realizing he was naked and wet in front of you for the first time, Doyoung looked down at his body. He was holding the ends of the towel with his left fist, gripping it as if his life depended on it.

“Don’t worry,” you said. “I’m not looking at your body, Do-ie.”

“I told you not to call me that,” Doyoung said. “I’m not a child.”

“And I told you I needed the shower today,” you said. “I thought we had an agreement.”

“This is my apartment!” Doyoung said, his voice sounding very much like a child’s.

He began to feel self-conscious about his body. But you didn’t look at him, you only looked at his eyes. You had uncrossed your arms and relaxed your body, so he did the same. For a moment, Doyoung thought you were going to wave the peace flag and apologize, but in real life, things could never be perfect.

“So you keep telling me,” you said. “Every day. I’m starting to think you don’t want me here.”

“All of us need to have a talk,” Doyoung said. “And soon. You’re always here. Don’t you have a home? Friends? Is that why you’re always here? No one else will have you. You’re using up my stuff. I don’t like my stuff being touched. I liked that body wash you didn’t ask before you used. I feel like you’ve overstayed your welcome here. You’re right. I don’t want you here.”

Without waiting for a clever retort, Doyoung turned around and stalked back to the bathroom. He slammed the bathroom door behind him and leaned against it to catch his breath. When he heard the front door slam, he should have relaxed, but he couldn’t help feeling terrible about what he said.

Around midnight, Doyoung was startled awake. His bedroom light was on, and Jaehyun was standing in the doorway. His suit was crumpled, his eyes red-rimmed, and there was an absent look in his eyes. He’d been working hard at the office lately, but there was more to it than that. His friend was trying his hardest to be a good boyfriend, and was really showing up when you needed him. Though it made him exhausted 24/7, Doyoung could also see improvements in Jaehyun’s attitude in just a short month. He was so far removed from the man that wanted to break up with you. Doyoung knew he should be happy for Jaehyun, but there were strange feelings keeping him from being completely happy, and he was sure Jaehyun could feel them.

Doyoung leaned up on his elbows. Before he could ask if Jaehyun was okay, Jaehyun shoved his phone in Doyoung’s face. Doyoung squinted his eyes and tried to make out the white text against the blue background. The text message was from you. Doyoung’s heart dropped into his stomach as he read it:

He said he didn’t want me there. I don’t know, Jae. Maybe I should stay away for awhile. He hates me.

“What would make her think this?” Jaehyun asked.

He took Doyoung’s desk chair and whirled it around. The way Jaehyun sat in it with his legs spread and his elbows on his knees made Doyoung feel like a son getting an “I’m disappointed in you” talk. That was twice in one day people made him feel inferior.

“I didn’t mean it, “ Doyoung said, “ It was just something I say when I’m angry.”

Jaehyun leaned back. He looked irritated, a little sad. Doyoung sat up fully and tried to gather his thoughts to form one coherent thought Jaehyun could understand. Jaehyun waited patiently, and for that, he was thankful. There were days Doyoung felt his friends gave him more than he deserved.

Doyoung continued, “We all say things we don’t mean when we’re angry. I felt really sorry about it after I said it. Can you tell her I’m sorry for me?”

“She’s afraid to come back here,” Jaehyun said. “You’re really fucking this up for me, man.”

“I’m fucking it up for you? What about me? I’m the victim. She turned the water on when I was in the shower,” Doyoung said, his irritation rising to match Jaehyun’s. “And she walks around here like she owns this place. Look, Jaehyun, I know she’s your girl, and I try to respect that, but it’s getting to be too much. Don’t you think so?”

Doyoung couldn’t keep the edge out of his voice, and Jaehyun noticed. For the last month, things had noticeably turned a little sour between them. Doyoung didn’t know if it was jealousy that fueled the things he would nitpick Jaehyun about, or something else. All Doyoung knew for sure was that he wasn’t the only one driving the wedge deeper. Jaehyun was guilty of a lot, too. After Jaehyun initially confided in Doyoung and got the response that he did, Jaehyun never confided in him again. He wanted his relationship with you to be private, while also bringing it into the public space he and Doyoung shared. Sometimes, Doyoung wished he would either move out and leave him in peace, or start treating him like he did before, like a friend.

In fact, you were really the only one Doyoung spoke to in the apartment. You would meet at the kitchen table in the mornings, sipping coffees and pretending to be more interested in what was on your phones. You would tell him about the movies that were on television, and he would say he wasn’t interested until he found himself sitting with you alone, hugging his knees to his chest and trying not to breathe too loudly. Jaehyun was rarely home because of work, and when he was, all he did was mutter gruff hellos and goodbyes. You made excuses on Jaehyun’s behalf, but it was easy for Doyoung to figure out what was going on.

In short, something about their friendship changed, and it was hard not to blame you sometimes. You were the intruder. You were the replacement that Doyoung never asked for, and you were the one who fucked everything up.

“Just apologize to her when she comes over tomorrow,” Jaehyun said, standing up. “I’m tired. I’m going to bed.”

Back in the day, Jaehyun would have argued until the sun rose. The new distance felt strange to Doyoung, He didn’t know which Jaehyun to mourn the most, but as he laid back down in his bed, he felt the loss of each one of them.

When Doyoung came home from work, you were already there waiting at the kitchen table, your hands warming a cup of coffee from a cafe spot around the corner. Jaehyun had given you a spare key to the apartment, one which you had used quite liberally. Feeling too tired to argue about it, he set down his things and trudged across the table towards you.

Doyoung noticed the way you moved the chair just an inch back as he sat down at the table. Your body language was guarded. Your eyes were looking at everything else except him. When you did finally look at him after he cleared his throat to get your attention, your eyes were stuck to Doyoung’s hand poised right in front of you.

“Can we call a truce before Jaehyun arrives home?” Doyoung asked. “Or do we need daddy to supervise our issues for us.”

“The only one who gets to call him daddy is me,” you said. “And I’d rather not shake your hand. I don’t now where your hands have been.”

Doyoung let his hand drop to the table before he slid it back to his body in defeat. If easy is what he wanted, he wasn’t going to get it. He leaned back in the chair and felt like getting up and going straight to bed. He didn’t need to talk anything out. He hardly needed to apologize for something he didn’t do.

“Where is Jaehyun anyway?” Doyoung asked.

“How should I know?”

“He’s your boyfriend.”

“Is he? you asked. “He’s been feeling a little bit like our boyfriend lately.”

Hearing that made Doyoung’s jaw tighten. He felt the bitter laugh leave his mouth before he could stop it. You narrowed your eyes and braced yourself for whatever words Doyoung was sure to fling your way.

“Actually,” Doyoung began. “I’ve been feeling like the boyfriend lately. You spend most of your nights with me. I keep you entertained, fed, and I give you a roof over your head. Jaehyun’s just the guy that gets all the benefits.”

As soon as the words left his mouth, Doyoung realized how ugly they sounded. He had been so unlike himself lately that he was saying and doing things he never thought possible of him.

“I’m sorry, “Doyoung said. “I’m an idiot.”

You didn’t speak, just looked down at your hands. Doyoung watched you cautiously, too scared to speak any further. He knew making you angry was his way of pushing you away. If he didn’t like you, he couldn’t love you. Truthfully, he was beginning to feel like the boyfriend. It hurt him to be able to sit with you and watch movies, to laugh when you said something funny, and to spend his mornings with you. Jaehyun was the one who was supposed to fill that role, not him. Doyoung had become too comfortable and too happy in his newfound place, and when things came crashing down, as they so often did, it was his way of trying to end things before they truly began. He just wanted to protect himself before it was too late.

“I didn’t use your body wash,” you said. “And I’m sorry I ran the water. Things have been hard for me lately and-.”

Before you could go into the sob story that would make him feel awful, he tried to brush off your feelings. He stood up to avoid the conversation. It was a train wreck. All he wanted was to steer clear of the option of having to comfort you, which was something a boyfriend would do. He wasn’t your boyfriend, and never would be.

“I’m tired, “he said. “I’m going to sleep.”

You stood up. “What is your problem? Do you really hate me that much that you can’t listen to me speak? Are you jealous of me? Am I taking too much time away from your precious Jaehyun? I know you listen to us fucking. I know you probably get off on it. ”

Doyoung blushed. “No, I don’t.”

You both stood on opposite sides of the table, staring each other down. The fight was brewing, but before it could create an imperfect storm, the apartment’s electricity shut off, leaving both of you in complete darkness. Doyoung looked out of the window and saw that, for as far as the eye could see, the city was burnt out. There was a dead silence, the only sound coming from your heavy breathing and the sound of his mind working.

“Oh,” you said. “Doyoung, I’m scared of the dark.”

At the same time that Doyoung held out his hand to look for you in the darkness, your fingers reached out for him. Touching your hand felt foreign to him, but he took it and pulled you closer.

“It’s okay, “ he said. “This happens a lot here. The lights will be back on sooner than you think.”

“I’m really freaking out,” you said. “You don’t understand. I can’t be alone in the dark. I still sleep with a nightlight. ”

You were gripping his arm so tightly it was beginning to hurt him. He was trying to break free from your death grip and grab candles, but you pulled him back and begged him not to leave you.

“ I won’t leave you, “he said. “But if I don’t grab the candles, we’re going to be stuck not being able to see. Do you want that?”

Doyoung could feel you shaking. His eyes were beginning to make out the outline of your body in the darkness. The whites of your eyes were darting all over the place. You stepped forward until you were so close to his body that he could just lean in and kiss you. He was dizzy with the thought.

“Can I come with you?” you asked. “Promise me you won’t leave me alone.”

“I won’t leave you alone.” Doyoung said, his first few words of raw honesty. It was a promise he wanted to keep.

He held your hand tight and walked across the apartment with you trailing behind him. You called out that you would keep your eyes closed because your vision was playing tricks on you. He tried to reassure you that he would lead you across the floor, telling you where to step so you would avoid tripping over something. Doyoung didn’t want you to fall and hurt yourself.

“We’re almost there,” Doyoung said. “I guess Jaehyun can’t make fun of me for burning so many candles anymore.”

“He never makes fun of you.” you said.

Doyoung laughed. “I don’t believe that. Just step over the threshold...there you go.”

You both made it into Doyoung’s room. His heart was hammering in his chest two times the normal speed. The last time you were together in his room, you were sleeping in his bed. Also, Doyoung didn’t want to admit that he was terrified of the dark, too.

He led you further into his room, his hand never letting yours go. He looked around for the candles and lighter, and when he found them, he lit them up. When the room was filled with a soft orange light, you still didn’t let go of his hand.

“That’s a relief.” you said.

Then, as if you remembered, you looked down at your hand and let Doyoung’s fingers fall from yours. He could feel the awkwardness crackling in the air between you. You moved away to create space. Doyoung rolled his eyes and started moving around his room. He wanted to remember all the reasons why he was angry and continue the conversation, but all he could think about was how soft your skin was and how you had looked at him like he was your savior.

“It’s been awhile since I’ve been in here,” you said. “Not that I remember much about that night.”

You started looking on his shelves, poking and prodding things. Doyoung spun around and was getting ready to tell you off until you held up a painting in your hands. It was a painting of a landscape, with rolling green hills and a perfect, sunny blue sky.

“This is really pretty,” you said. “Did you paint it yourself?”

“Yes.”

“Nice,” you said, putting it back. “You have talent”

“Uh...not really.”

“You do,” you said, moving around the room again. “It’s not just the painting either. Your singing voice is amazing.”

He wasn’t good at receiving compliments. Doyoung usually blocked them out in favor of self-deprecation, and in doing so, he missed what you had said. His mind started piecing the words together until they formed a sentence.

Your singing voice is amazing.

“My...what...is what?” he asked.

“Singing voice,” you said. “I can hear you singing in the shower and in your room and sometimes when you’re cooking. You should sing professionally.”

“I didn’t think anyone noticed.”

“Doyoung, I always notice you,” you said. “Sometimes it’s hard not to.”

The silence was very loud. You looked at each other in the soft light. Your bodies were shadowy figures on the walls, crawling up the sides until they joined together as one. Doyoung didn’t know what to say, so he kept quiet. And there, in the silence, you gave him That Look, and although his mind tried to convince himself it was just the absence of light distorting your face, he could also feel the static electricity between you. You both lit up the room with it.

You stepped forward as if to make a move. At the same time, the electricity popped on and Jaehyun arrived through the front door. You stepped back and sighed heavily. You mouthed the words Thank You before stepping out Doyoung’s room.

#doyoung #kim doyoung #jaehyun #jung jaehyun #nct #nct 127 #doyoung fanfiction #jaehyun fanfiction #doyoung smut #jaehyun smut #nct smut #nct fanfiction #nct angst #nct fluff #nct doyoung #jaehyun angst #jaehyun fluff #nct jaehyun

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amazingphanisnotonfire-imagines · 4 years

Text

Reggie//want you stealing my time even though i said i wanna be alone

Request: Can I request a Reggie/Reader with the song That's Us by Anson Seabra, maybe angst with a happy ending somehow? or just like the "vibe" of the song?

hey! i hope you like this!! its angsty which is something i love writing, but it does have a happy ending (sort of)!! have a great day everyone!!

“So are you and Reggie officially over?” Betty asks, your bedroom goes silent as everyone looks at her and then at you. You feel yourself shrink slightly and you shift on the bed, not really knowing what to do. All eyes are on you as Betty, Veronica and Josie wait for you to answer.

“Erm. Yep, I would say so.” You nod, keeping your gaze on the white duvet. Your fingers trace the flowers delicately sewn onto the fabric while you try and think of a way out of the conversation. It’s a conversation you’ve had over and over again, and it’s one you dread a little more every time it happens.

“But you’ve broke up before. What makes you so sure this time?” Veronica asks, earning a small muttering of her name from Betty and an eye roll from Josie. You’d invited them over to cheer you up, but if anything you feel more depressed than before. And to make it worse, you know there’s no way you’re going to get out of it, however desperate you are.

They’ll just keep pushing until they know what happened, they always do. You love your friends dearly, but they don’t know when to take a hint and to just leave something alone.

So you take a deep breath and force yourself to look at them, trying to keep a neutral expression as you tell them details of how Reggie had broken your heart a mere two hours earlier.

“The fact that he told me to get out of his life made it pretty clear.” You say, the words desperately trying to stay unspoken, but you force them out. You’re sure you sound bitter.

You tried your best to make it sound like you didn’t care, like its happened so many other times so whats the difference now? But the way their expressions change from curiosity to sympathy shows that you tried and failed. Something you’re getting quite good at these days.

“Oh.” Josie says quietly, placing a hand on your thigh.

“Yep.”

“Well, at least he can’t upset you anymore.” Betty tries, looking at the others in hopes that they’ll agree.

“I think I’m still gonna be upset.” You sigh.

“Maybe it’s a blessing in disguise.” Josie says, and the three of you look at her confused. “All I’m saying is that you and Reggie have been together and not before. I’m not saying I’m happy that this happened, but maybe it’ll be good for you. You can find somebody that will love you through everything, not just the good bits.”

i thought he did

“Yeah, maybe.” You shrug.

She has a point. Everyone knows that you and Reggie have a complicated relationship. You clearly like each other, but as soon as you try anything serious, he gets scared and it ends in disaster. Your friends are left to pick up the pieces while Reggie goes off and does god knows what with whoever will let him. It’s obvious that you like each other, but no matter how many times you try, something always seems to go wrong.

“I should’ve known it wouldn’t happen this time.”

“Why?” Veronica asks.

“I dunno, just something didn’t feel right.” You look at her. “Don’t give me that look. Nothing about this time felt right.”

“You did start seeing each other again very quickly.” Betty says. “Maybe thats it. Maybe you need to take things slowly.”

“Yeah, but it happens every goddam time. We like each other, we get together and it gets too much for him.”

“Y/n-”

“And to make it worse, for a while I thought this time we could have actually been something. I mean yeah, it didn’t feel entirely right, but I thought maybe thats just what we needed. Maybe we needed something different for it to work. I thought we could actually try, but we didn’t and then...”

The girls just look at each other, unsure of what to say. Every single one of your friends have been rooting for the two of you. Since the day you met, there’s been something between the two of you. They watched two best friends fall in love over the years, a love that was blindingly obvious to everyone but the two of you. So when Reggie finally confessed that he liked you, everyone, including yourself thought that was it. You’d live happily ever after and that would be it.

But then you entered a casual relationship and it was a disaster from start to finish. Full of feelings and complicated emotions that neither one of you knew how to deal with. So it always ended in tears.

You had tried to make it work properly, but Reggie hears the word relationship and he breaks out in a cold sweat, no matter how hard he wants one with you. You’re the only girl he could ever actually picture a future with, but his heart and his head want different things and he follows his head every single time.

A few hours pass and eventually Josie, Betty and Veronica go home. Leaving you alone with your own thoughts, which is never good. You stare at your phone, wishing for it to light up. A text, a call anything. Anything to distract yourself from the thoughts swirling around your head.

Everyone says life isn’t fair, and right now, you couldn’t agree more.

Life isn’t fair, timing’s a bitch and boys are the worst.

You glance at your phone again but the only thing you see is your reflection in the dark screen. You sigh and climb under the covers, pulling them all the way up over your head. You pull a teddy out from under your back you have to squeeze your eyes closed to stop yourself from crying. Reggie had seen it while he was out with his friends, they made fun of him, but he bought it proudly, excited to give it to you when he saw you.

You shove it underneath your pillow and turn around, to stare at the blank wall beside you. Your eyes flutter shut and you find yourself thinking of him. Thinking of how the other night when you couldn’t sleep, you’d rang him. He’d been the only thing you could think of so you thought if you spoke to him, you’d sleep easier.

He’d answered after the second ring and when he spoke you smiled so wide your entire face hurt. His voice was groggy from sleep but it was the cutest thing you’d ever heard and you wondered why you hadn’t done this sooner. Your mind had been racing with what ifs, but as soon as you heard him talk, you felt yourself relax.

You talked for a while and he listened. You thought he’d fallen asleep, so you apologized for stealing his precious sleep and were just about to hang up but he quickly stopped you.

“I want you stealing my time.”

“Even though you said you wanted to be alone?” You tease, remembering a time when he was drunk. You said you’d stay with him, but he’d argued, saying he wanted to be by himself and that he’d be fine. Of course you didn’t listen and he was so confused when he woke up the next morning to find you asleep on his bedroom floor.

“Always.” He replies. You didn’t even have to see him to know he was smiling.

At the time, you thought the moment was perfect. But when you look back at it now, it makes your chest ache.

How foolish you were to think it could have worked, that it could have ended well.

But then again, you’re only human and it seems you never learn. You couldn’t help falling for him again, and iit doesn’t make it right. You don’t think anything can.

You’ve probably called him all the names under the sun by the time you fall asleep. Some of them were whispered to yourself, others you text him.

He’s the most selfish person you’ve ever met, and you make sure to tell him. To make him hurt even a fraction of how he hurt you. Because its not nice to be picked up and thrown away whenever he feels like it. You can’t tell someone you love them if you don’t mean it.

You don’t get a reply, but you know he feels the same way. He’s probably talking to all of his friends. They’ll be telling him that everything is okay, that we’ll be fine, reassuring him that he did the right thing.

Your sleep is restless, he breaks your heart even when you’re dreaming. You dream of him coming over at midnight, telling you he’s sorry and that he loves you. He spends the night but when you wake up he’s gone, leaving your bed cold and lonely while you want more of him.

“Y/n?” You hear someone whisper and it makes you sit up quickly. You flip the lamp on, and your eyes scan the dimly lit room until they settle on a figure stood by the window. Your stare hardens as you watch the last person you want to see slowly make his way towards you.

He looks sad. Good, you think. He deserves it. But then you feel bad for thinking that so you just decide to look at your duvet again, the flowers being a welcome distraction.

“Y/n?” He repeats, his voice a little louder, but the tone is the same. Cautious, like he’s waiting to see what your reaction will be.

“What do you want?” You ask through gritted teeth, forcing yourself to look him in the eye and he shrinks under your gaze.

“I came here to say sorry.” He replies making you scoff.

“And what number will this be?”

“I really am sorry Y/n.”

“Like you were the last time? And the time before that? Oh and what about the time before that?”

“Yes.” He says louder. “I get it okay. I’m an ass.”

“Well, at least there’s something we agree on.”

“But please Y/n. Listen to me.”

“Why should I?”

“Because I asked you to.”

“I don’t owe you anything.” You shrug.

“You’re right. You don’t. But I owe you an explanation.”

“What’s there to explain? We get together and then when I think it’s going to get serious, when you give me all of these hints and clues that you want more from us, you say it’s too much.”

“I need to tell you something.” He pleads, but you just stare at him.

“No, there’s something I need to tell you.” You argue and he stares at you in shock. “I can take the fall, but I can only fall for you so many times. I can only fall without you there to catch me so many times before I start to bruise. And I can take all the pain and pleasure, but I need you beside me during it. I need you to want all of it too. For better, or for worse. But what I can’t take is this. I can’t do it anymore.” You finish, tears flow down your cheeks as you look anywhere but at him.

He stares at you in shock, before hesitantly walking towards you and sitting at the bottom of your bed.

“Y/n. I came here to tell you that I love you.” He says and you look at him cautiously. “I know I’ve made you feel like I loved you before, but this time I really mean it. I’ve never had a girlfriend, not a serious one anyway. To be honest the idea of one absolutely terrifies me. And when I thought of being in a relationship with you, it terrified me too, despite how much I wanted it. But then I thought about it more, and I thought about how I would feel if I didn’t have you in my life and that scared me a hell of a lot more than anything else. I want you. I want this.”

“Reggi-”

“I’m not finished yet.” He interrupts you and you stare at him annoyed. “Y/n, I love you. I’m so in love with and I know I’m the last person to know and I definitely don’t deserve you. But I want to make this work. It’s the one thing I want more than anything in the world. I know we can make this work. I know I want to. So please,” He grabs your hand and squeezes it making you look at him. “Can we try again. And I mean really try?”

“I-” You start, not really sure what to say. Well, you know what you want to say. But you can’t quite let yourself say yes, not yet. There’s still so many what-ifs and unanswered questions. “But what if we’re wrong? What if we’re not all that we thought?”

“Then we won’t make it.”

“Reggie...” You tear up again and he sighs, quickly wiping the few tears that have escaped away. His hands rest on your cheek and the two of you look at each other. You see an entire future with him, but it feels too far away. Too hard to get to.

“But it doesn’t mean it’s not worth trying. I think the possibility that it might not work out, that this is our last chance to make it work, will make us fight more.”

“But isn’t that just forcing it?” You ask.

“Maybe. But maybe thats what we need.”

“You want us to force a relationship?”

“No. I want us to really try at a relationship. Because when I think of my future, I really do see you in it. And I like what I see, so I want to try as hard as I can to make sure that happens.”

“This is gonna be really fucking difficult isn’t it?” You sigh, sitting back a little.

His hands drop from your cheeks, finding your own again and he holds them tightly. He slouches and the two of you stare at the open window, a gentle breeze makes the curtain move a little and the two of you just watch for a while.

Finally, after what feels like seconds and hours all at once, he answers your question.

“I guess that's love”

#reggie mantle #reggie mantle imagine #reggie mantle x reader #reggie mantle x you #reggie mantle x y/n #riverdale #riverdale imagine

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keichanz · 4 years

Text

More Than

so i was listening to the song More Than My Hometown by Morgan Wallen which is now my new obsession and i shit you not, the ending to this little drab popped into my brain so fast i knew i had to write it down. thus, this angsty little blurb was born.

now as i was writing, i realized that it was giving off sooo many One Last Ride vibes, written by the ever so talented @lemonlushff, that i decided to tweak this so it could tuck somewhere into the story itself as a sort of unofficially official glimpse of their breakup. i’m happy to report that it has Lemon’s official seal of approval and she loved it!

so now i’m gonna share it with all you fine folks and i hope you enjoy it too! :) and since it is in the OLR universe, there will be angst hahahaa.

so this is for you Lemon, my sweet and sour friend~ ❤️

one last thing--i highly recommend either having the song above playing while you read this, or at least listen to it beforehand. yes, it’s a country song, but it really is so good and the lyrics - which i’ve italicized and bolded - seem to reflect Inuyasha’s thoughts perfectly, which is why i thought it fit so well with OLR’s theme.

....shit okay one last last thing: i swear to fuck that the ending jumped out of a scene from a goddamn western harlequin romance novel with its level of cliche and drama and yes i am entirely proud of that fact ;ljadfilajflkahjsfue

She stood beside the bed, feeling empty, cold, hollow as she stared down at the pillows and blankets. It was still unmade, the sheets twisted, messy from her hasty retreat just that morning. Tears burned her eyes as she remembered why; the argument, the begging, the screaming. The heartbreak.

Her heart twinged and Kagome gasped, closing her eyes as she brought up a hand to cover her mouth. Was this…was this really it? Were they really going to leave things like this, unresolved and painful between them? God, she didn’t want to. She wanted to run outside, run through the night to his house, throw open the front door and beg him to—

Her bedroom door crashed open and Kagome gasped, whirling around with wide, liquid eyes, heart in her throat. Golden eyes, furious, hard, bore into her own and suddenly a heat suffused her body, chasing away the previous chill, and her stomach swooped as he shut the door and stalked toward her.

Her breath left her in a stuttered exhale, body trembling, coming alive from the heat in his gaze.

“Inuy—”

“Shut up,” he growled, grabbing her waist, hauling her in tight against him. His lips fell over hers, swallowing her gaps, the crush of his mouth hard, unforgiving, punishing.

Hands – frantic, desperate – removed clothing, touching, grabbing, caressing. They fell on the bed in tangle of limbs, skin against skin, heart against heart, flushed, needy, desperate. Growls, moans, whispered pleas echoed throughout the darkness of the room as they rocked together, moving in a dance as old as time. Fingers grasping sweat slicked skin, hearts thundering wildly and then perfectly syncing in a moment of euphoric completion. A stuttered breath, a gasp of a name; then silence.

Tears trekked down her flushed face as she was gathered against a hard chest, as familiar arms wrapped around her stated body and held her as she cried.

Girl, our mamas are best friends and so are we The whole town's rooting for us like the home team Most likely to settle down Plant a few roots real deep and let 'em grow

Kagome stood in front of the full-length mirror and ran a brush through her still damp hair, the yellow and blue sundress she wore complimenting the blue of her eyes. Blue eyes that were dull as they stared at her reflection, but didn’t really see it.

Which was just as well. She didn’t know why she picked this dress to wear, but had felt compelled to wear it anyway, even if looking at it made the vice on her heart tighten even more.

A gentle knock on her door startled her out of her thoughts and she blinked. Kagome turned her head in time to watch her mother crack open the door and poke her head inside, her smile kind, but her eyes sad. The older woman took in her daughter and her smile faded, but she didn’t comment as she stepped inside.

“Souta brought the car around,” she said softly. “And the keys are in it. Do you need help with your bags?”

“No,” Kagome answered and looked at her reflection again. “I packed most of them in the car last night. I just have my carry-on left.”

Mama nodded but said nothing as gazed at her daughter. Her heart ached at the pain she saw reflected in those dear features, in the eyes were that identical to her late husband’s—Kagome’s father.

“Kagome…” she started, but then sighed as those sad, sad eyes turned toward her once again. Mama shook her head. “Are you going to say goodbye?”

Kagome’s breath hitched. She didn’t need to ask who she was talking about. She swallowed past the lump in her throat and tried to ignore the butterflies that took flight in her belly.

“I…I’m going to try,” she whispered and god help her, but she couldn’t stop the tears from welling in her eyes. “But Mama, I don’t…he probably doesn’t want to see…”

Her throat tightened and she pressed her lips tightly together to stifle the sob that welled up. Immediately arms, warm and familiar, surrounded her. Kagome buried her face in her mother’s shoulder as the tears spilled from her eyes.

“I’ll talk to Izayoi,” Mama murmured and kissed her daughter’s head, her heart aching for her little girl as she felt her own eyes getting hot with the threat of tears. “If anyone can talk some sense into that boy, it’s his mother.”

Kagome sniffled and nodded, grateful that her mother would help her in this endeavor. It was unlikely he’d want to see her, but she had to at least try…

Closing her eyes as her mother rubbed her back and smoothed her hair, Kagome clung to her mother and let herself remember, the memories flashing before her mind’s eye and then fading away just as quickly, only to be replaced by another one, fresher, more precious, more painful than the one before.

But we can't stop this real world from spinnin' us Your bright lights called, I don't blame you for pickin' up Your big dream bags are all packed up and ready to go But I just need you to know

“Shhh! Quit laughing or they’ll hear us!”

Another badly stifled giggle echoed in the night as he drew her into the darkness of the trees, toward their secret spot they’d found years ago. One hand held a six pack while the other held tight to her hand, fingers laced, and he couldn’t stop the grin from spreading across his face before an exhilarated chuckle of his own burst from his lips.

Darkness gave way to the orange glow of a fire, the soft crackling of wood breaking the stillness of the night.

“Why is this so good?”

“Because we’re seventeen.”

“If we get caught, I’m blaming you.”

“Shut up and maybe we won’t be.”

“Hey, this was your idea—”

The rest of the words were stolen in a kiss, a hand coming up to cradle her jaw as a ragged sigh whispered against her lips. He tasted like beer and spearmint gum. She smiled. A strange combination, but it was him, and she loved it.

“You should have seen it, Inuyasha,” Kagome gushed a year later, sitting on her bed as she excitedly gushed about her time in LA to her best friend. “The sunset was absolutely gorgeous, like nothing you’ve ever seen before! God, I wish you were there with me. I just know you’d love it.”

Inuyasha smiled and reached forward to tuck a strand of hair behind her ear. “I doubt I can love anything more than you.”

Blue eyes widened as a flush spread across her cheeks; her breath hitched, lips forming his name and eyes drifting closed as he leaned forward and took her mouth in a warm, lazy kiss.

“Would you ever wanna go?”

“Go where?” Fingers racked through dark hair and her sigh was blissful, a soft melody in his ears.

“California.”

“…You mean like…visit?”

“Well, maybe longer than a visit…like an extended trip, or something…lots of opportunities out that way…”

A brief pause before the fingers continued. “No. …Do you?”

“Mmm…dunno. Maybe after graduation? I had so much fun last time, but…”

“But what?”

A pause. Then, “Nothing. Kiss me.”

A husky chuckle before a pair of lips covered her own and any thoughts about the Golden State far, far from her mind as she returned his kiss.

That I love you more than a California sunset More than a beer when you ain't twenty-one yet More than a Sunday morning Lord Turnin' some poor lost souls 'round, Hallelujah bound

“Ewww, get that away from me!”

“C’mon Kagome, it’s just a worm! It ain’t gonna bite ya!”

“Eeee! Inuyasha, don’t you dare—!”

Laughter as he chased her around with a baited hook, the sound of water splashing as bare feet waded into the lake.

“Wait, I think I got something!”

The crank of a fishing rod as he reeled it in, the water splashing as whatever was caught struggled against the pull. Grunting, muttered curses, and soft giggling before with a splash the bass burst from the water, dangling from the hook.

“You got it!”

“Damn, ain’t nothing more satisfying than that feeling when the bass hits the hook!”

“I can think of one thing…”

Soft lips, warm and smiling, pressed against his own and Inuyasha abruptly decided that yeah, this was definitely better.

“California?”

“Yeah! Can’t you just imagine it, Inuyasha? The lights, the nightlife, the ocean, and no more snow! You always complain about the snow.”

“Yeah, but…Kagome, I don’t know…”

“Just think about it, okay? I’m not asking for you to decide right now. But this is something I’ve thought about for a while now, Inuyasha, and I just…I want to experience it with you. Please?”

A pause, and then heavy sigh. “Fine. I’ll think about it.”

A brilliant smile, soft lips pressing to his cheek in a warm kiss. “You know I love you, right?”

“…I know, Kagome. Me, too.”

“I can’t believe you’re reading that crap.”

“It’s not crap, it’s romantic. You could probably learn something or two from these books, you uncultured dog.”

“Uncultured? Really?”

“Besides, I like it when the guy gets the girl at the end. Makes me feel all warm and fuzzy.”

“I can make you feel all warm and fuzzy, too.”

Her gasp was cut off as lips pressed against her neck and hands slipped beneath her shirt to roam across soft skin. The book fell from her fingers to dive into silver hair, eyes closing as her head fell back with a breathy sigh.

“Yes.”

The blood was rushing so loudly in his ears he barely heard her and the thundering of his heart against his chest was so forceful, it was a wonder it didn’t leap out into her waiting hands.

“Y-yes?” he echoed, voice naught but a disbelieving rasp as he stared at her with wide, shocked - and cautiously hopeful - golden eyes.

A half-sob, half-laugh burst from her lips and her eyes were bright from more than just the unshed tears brimming the beautiful depths. Lips trembled as she smiled, hand trembling even more as she held it out before her.

“Yes,” she whispered. “Yes, Inuyasha, I’ll marry you. I—”

What she felt next wasn’t the cool metal of his grandmother’s ring as it found a new home on her finger, but instead the warmth of her beloved’s hand as it wrapped around hers and yanked her forward into his arms. They tumbled to the ground, laughing, crying, exchanging endless kisses and promises of forever as the ring, forgotten on the ground but still nestled within the velvet box, glittered merrily in the warm glow of the fire.

Yeah, I love you more than the feeling when the bass hits a hook When the guy gets the girl at the end of the book But, baby, this might be the last time I get to lay you down 'Cause I can't love you more than my hometown

“Come with me.”

Silence; thick, stony. Cold.

Desperation made her voice high, the words falling from her lips fast. “Inuyasha, please, come back with me—we’d have such an amazing time together, learning, living and—you can enroll in my school, Inuyasha! It’s not too late, there are so many programs to choose from, and I just think you can do so much more with your life than—”

“Than what, Kagome?” The words were snapped, harsh, biting as he whirled around to peg her with a hard stare. “Than taking on the valued responsibility of the ranch that’s been in my family for fucking generations? Than building our fucking house? You know, the one we'll live in after we’re married? I can’t do that, Kagome. I won’t.”

“But that’s just it, Inuyasha, you have no room to grow here! You’re stifled by the responsibility you feel to take over the ranch when leaving could relieve you of that burden! The world is so big, Yash, and there’s so much more beyond this little town, so if you would just trust me—”

“You’re asking me to drop and leave everything I know behind, Kagome!” His voice was loud, thunderous in his anger, his frustration, his pain. “This my home, our home, and you just want me to leave like it don’t even matter! Like the fucking life I’m trying to build for us don’t even matter!”

“That’s why I’m asking you to come with me!” Tears, hot, salty ran unchecked down her face, blue eyes big and pleading and flashing with undisguised panic. “I want to be with you, Inuyasha, I do, but I need you to understand—!”

“Then be with me here, dammit!” A note of desperation, amber eyes pleading, frantic, angry.

A choked sob, a muffled whimper. “I can’t…”

An anguished sound, a shattered cry, and then a door slamming shut, loud, devastating, final.

The words slammed into him harder than any blow he’d ever received, the shock greater than hitting the unforgiving ground after falling off a horse, and the pain far, far worse than he ever could have imagined.

Fuck, it would have hurt less if she’d just outright slapped him in the face.

She wouldn’t look at him, her gaze focused on the ground, dark hair hiding her expression. He swallowed once, twice; his mouth felt like a desert, his tongue heavy, thick, useless. His throat worked but no sound came out. Ice replaced the blood in his veins, freezing his lungs, making it hard to breathe.

“Wh…what did you s…” He shook his head, swayed on his feet as he blinked hard. He couldn't have heard her right. She couldn't have just told him—

“…I cheated on you. Inuyasha, I—”

He didn’t hear the rest of what she said. His legs abruptly gave out and he stumbled back, sitting down hard onto the fallen log behind him. The log he’d proposed to her on. The log they’d kissed on—

He shook his head again, a frown pulling his brows down low over his eyes as he tried to register the words spilling from her mouth a mile a minute. Two days…two days ago. That—that didn’t make any sense. He couldn’t—he couldn’t smell anything, couldn’t detect any sort of incriminating evidence that suggested she’d been unfaithful.

Amber eyes lifted, flashing with tentative hope. She’d been drunk—she didn’t remember, so maybe if he told her—

The sight of his grandmother’s ring, nestled in the middle of her palm, might as well have been his heart because it sure as sure shit felt like she’d just ripped it out of his chest. His stomach clenched, the breath seized in his lungs, and a curious numbness spread throughout his entire body. The realization hit him even harder than the pain had, and that in and of itself would have brought him to his knees had he not already been sitting.

Honeyed eyes, agonized, pleading, lifted to her face. Again she would not meet his gaze, eyes closed against the tears that spilled down her cheeks. He suddenly tasted salt and with a start he realized he was crying too, the tears warm as they streaked down his pale face but he gave them no mind.

“K…Kagome…” It was the only thing he could get through a throat tight from anguish. A plea, a prayer, a question all in one as he stared at her, heedless of the tears that continued to fall.

Her eyes squeezed shut and she shook her head; a clenched sob broke from her lips as she reached forward, grabbed his hand, closed his fingers around the ring, giving it back, giving back his heart that she no longer wanted. Pain, sharp and intense, pierced through him and he gasped, unable to do a damned thing as she backed away from him, arms folded around herself.

“I’m sorry,” she rasped, shaking her head, over and over, backing away. “I just…I can’t…”

A sob, borne of a sorrow so deep, of regret and fear and pain so sharp it felt it in the very marrow of his bones, broke free of her lips right before she whirled around and dashed away, through the night, through the trees, away from the fire, away from him.

Inuyasha could do nothing but sit there, his rejected grandmother’s ring clutched in his fist and his vision blurry from hot tears as he watched her run. Curious, that instead of the crushing pain he expected to feel in his chest, there was a hollow ache that resonated, like an echo of a mournful howl for the one who had just run away with his heart.

What hurt more than the pain of watching her go, however, and more than the diamond cutting into his palm, was the jarring realization that the woman he loved more than his own life would rather fabricate a lie of infidelity than be with him.

And because he loved her more than his own happiness…he’d let her.

I ain't the runaway kind, I can't change that My heart's stuck in these streets like the train tracks City sky ain't the same black Ain't that a map dot shame, man, to think that

Sitting on his bed, freshly showered and donned in simple jeans and a t-shirt, Inuyasha’s head was bowed between his shoulders and his arms were propped on his knees. His hands, clenched into tight fists, gradually relaxed and a breath he hadn’t’ even realized he’d been holding rushed from his lungs, escaping his mouth in a harsh exhale that did absolutely nothing to absolve the torment wreaking his mind.

As the last vestiges of the memory faded away, far more painful than all the ones before, he opened his eyes and stared down at the hardwood floor, scuffed and scratched and worn. He frowned, his chest feeling tight, his stomach in knots, his muscles tensing and relaxing with a restless energy that was hard to ignore. He wanted to punch something, to run, to fight, fight for her to stay, fight for them.

But he remained where he was, hands flexing, jaw clenched, eyes shut tight against the pain that was determined to bring him to his knees. God, why, why did she have to—

Gentle rapping on the door before it was cracked open. He didn’t look up but he didn’t need to; he knew why she was here. The ache in his chest intensified, sharped, traveled up to knot in his throat and make it harder to breathe.

She didn’t say anything at first, simply stared. Then, “…She wants to see you.”

Inuyasha turned his head, looked out the window.

A pause. Then a sigh, resigned, sad. “Asako called. Before she showed up at the door, I mean. Asked me to talk to you. Said I would, but didn’t make any promises.” Pause. “You already know how I feel about her doing this, but…you should at least say goodbye. You’ll regret it if you don’t. You know you will.”

A tightening of his jaw and a deep furrowing of his brow was her response.

“…I’m sorry, my love.”

The door closed with a soft click.

A minute passed. Two. Three.

Inuyasha exploded to his feet, grabbed the lamp on the nightstand, and hurled it against the wall with a roar that was equal parts rage, frustration, and deep, intense anguish that reverberated throughout the entire house; echoing, thunderous, shattering.

Deafening silence followed his outburst; he sank to his knees and wept.

I love you more than a California sunset More than a beer when you ain't twenty-one yet More than a Sunday morning Lord Turnin' some poor lost souls around, Hallelujah bound Yeah, I love you more than the feeling when the bass hits a hook When the guy gets the girl at the end of the book But, baby, this might be the last time I get to lay you down Cause I can't love you more than my hometown

It was impossible not to hear it. As the color drained from Kagome’s face and her heart clenched in her chest, Izayoi stared at her with eyes hardened from the ache she was feeling for her son, the sorrow she felt at his heartbreak twisted into bitter, resentful anger at the woman standing before her.

Kagome closed her eyes, bit her lip to stifle the sob that welled in her throat, sucked in a shaky breath meant to harden her resolve. It didn’t and she fought not to fall apart on the front porch, locking knees that threatened to give out on her.

“Go,” Izayoi muttered in a voice like flint and ignored the younger woman’s flinch. “You’ve done enough damage here. And I’m not talking about whatever he just destroyed.”

Hot tears pricked the back of her eyes. Her throat tightened, preventing any words, protests, to spill from her mouth. She stared at the older woman with wide eyes, someone who she, for the longest time, had looked upon as a second mother, someone to confide in, to trust.

She found none of the warmth that she was used to seeing. No fondness, no compassion, no understanding. Coldness spread through Kagome’s veins, turning her blood to ice, knotting in her stomach, heavy, uncomfortable.

Izayoi stared back, cold, unforgiving, unregretful.

“I’m sorry,” Kagome whispered.

The older woman pressed her lips into a thin line and looked away, arms tight across her chest.

Rejected, heartbroken, Kagome turned, her feet feeling heavy as they carried her back to her car. The tears ran unchecked down her face now, streaming down pale cheeks. She tasted salt and she got in the vehicle, closed the door. Her body felt like it was on autopilot as she revved the engine and started down the long dirt driveway.

It wasn’t until she had gone halfway that she broke down, great, gasping sobs erupting from her throat. Her vision was blurry from the unending tears and her knuckles were white from gripping the steering wheel so hard. Without even realizing it her foot had slipped from the accelerator and she was merely coasting now, too distraught, too tormented to think about anything else but the pain ravaging her heart. Unbidden one last memory, the most recent, flashed before her mind’s eye, twisting the knife keeper, crushing her, killing her…

“Don’t do this.”

He froze at the softly uttered words, spoken in a tone so raw with pain that it trembled. He swallowed hard and turned his head just the slightest bit, but said nothing.

Silence. Thick, tense, deafening.

Then he tightened his jaw, hardened his eyes, and continued putting his boots on.

A choked sob, the rustle of cloth. “Inuyasha, please—”

“I’m sorry.”

He stood up from the side of the bed and refused to look at her as he collected his jacket, still sitting in a heap on the floor from where it was hastily thrown the night before.

A stuttered breath, followed by the salty scent of tears. His lips drew into a tight line and his hands fisted tightly at his sides as he forced himself to head toward the door. But, goddamn him, he paused right in front of it, hand on the knob, jaw clenched so hard it ached.

“Please,” she begged and the word was a raspy plea, vision blurry from tears. “If you would just—we can talk about this—”

“I love you, Kagome,” Inuyasha said and he heard her sharp intake of breath, but he didn’t turn around. He swallowed once, twice, and closed his eyes as he opened his mouth and forced the words past a throat tight with emotion.

“Inu—”

“But I can’t…love you more than this. I just…I can’t.”

Another sob, a hitched breath, and his chest ached. He bowed his head.

“See you around, Kagome,” he whispered and left, his footsteps fading down the hallway and down the stairs until the slam of the front door echoed in the dark house.

Kagome dropped her face into her hands and wept.

The front door burst open and Inuyasha was desperation personified as he rushed past his alarmed mother, sprinting as fast as he could toward the barn that held the horses. Not even a full minute later a white blur sped from the barn and bolted through the open gate of the pasture, following the car that was leaving with his love, his soul, his very heart.

Standing on the porch, Izayoi pressed a hand to her heart while the other covered her mouth, muffling the sob that burst from her lips as teary eyes watched her son chase after the woman who broke his heart.

'Cause I love you more than a California sunset I love you more in a twenty-dollar sundress Hate that loaded down car you got your keys in Girl, but I hate even more that you're leavin'

Urging his mount to go faster, harder, the thundering of her hooves against the ground rivaled that of the thundering of his heart in his chest. Hands gripping the coarse hair of her mane, Inuyasha grit his teeth against the harsh wind, his eyes wild, desperate and bright with unshed tears as he kicked the mare’s flanks to go faster, dammit, faster!

The distance between them was closing, the rumble of the engine, of gravel crunching beneath tires becoming louder until he was riding alongside her, along the fence that enclosed the front pasture. His hands fisted his mount’s mane in a while-knuckled grip as he leaned over her neck, legs tight to her sides.

He turned his head and wild, despairing golden eyes collided with wide, tear-filled blue.

Kagome’s heart lurched in her chest, making her gasp as goosebumps erupted on her skin. She sobbed, shaking her head, mouthing his name and forcing her eyes to look straight ahead. What—what was he doing?! Why?! God, he was making this even harder than it already was, taking her heart and stomping on it, cruel, cold, conniving.

But it made sense, didn’t it.

She had broken his heart, and now he was doing the same to her.

'Cause I love you more than the feeling when the bass hits a hook When the guy gets the girl at the end of the book But that ain't you and me so I guess I'll see you around 'Cause I can't love you more than my hometown

Inuyasha didn’t let up, not even when she looked away, gritting his teeth, kicking his mount to keep up when she accelerated. She was crying, and although he couldn’t hear her, he could see the way she shook, shoulders jerking, chest heaving, face wet from her tears and fuck she was wearing the sundress—

The end of the drive was in sight. Kagome slowed down, so did he, but she didn’t stop as she once again turned her head and caught his gaze. Inuyasha was already staring at her, heart in his eyes, a silent plea falling from his lips, willing her to hear….

“Don’t go.”

A sob, raw, choked, anguished.

“I’m sorry.”

Without even realizing, he let up on his mount, the mare slowing to a trot, a walk, and then stood still, recovering from the hard gallop. Golden eyes, awash with ears, watched the car reach the end of the drive and turn, driving away, going, going, getting smaller, fading.

Gone.

Something inside Inuyasha shattered and he didn’t think it could ever, ever be repaired.

Love you more than my hometown Love you more than my hometown Love you more, baby, love you more

#more than #inukag #inuyasha #inukag fanfiction #inuyasha fanfiction #One Last Ride #keizfanfiction #oneshot

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yuminsung · 4 years

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NCT 2020: SYNERGY (my wishes for an album)

I was positive we were getting an NCT 2020 comeback at the start of the year, however now I have realised I am a clown. So, instead, I have spent longer than I should’ve creating an album filled with stuff that I would like to see.

I want to preface this with the fact that I have no qualifications in anything related to music / album design / production or anything like that, this is just based on my opinions as a fan of music and NCT.

I’m gonna split this into 4 sections to kinda separate my thoughts, and so it’s easier to navigate.

1. TITLE

NCT 2018s album is titled EMPATHY, the definition of this being “the ability to understand and share the feelings of another”. I think SM chose this to reflect how NCT 2018 was an amalgamation of 127, DREAM, and U. I wanted to try and keep this theme for NCT 2020, though expand on it due to the addition of WAYV.

SYNERGY is defined as “the combined power of a group when they are working together, that is greater than the total power achieved by each working separately”. To be honest, I think the word ‘synergy’ perfectly sums up NCT’s concept of sub-units, so it would be a good choice for NCT 2020s album’s title due to its meaning as well as its similarity to ‘empathy’ sound-wise.

2. ALBUM COVER

The album cover for EMPATHY was very bright, like all the colours of the rainbow, but still very minimalistic and kinda futuristic? The NCT vibe. I think their second album would suit a slightly more mature design, and as I have no talent in design, I’m going to use existing album covers to give an idea of what i think would work well.

If SM was to go down the route of a similar album cover, I think the best example is the 1975′s newest album:

It still has the text elements that were prominent on EMPATHY’s cover, while being more minimalistic in colour (aside from the yellow side panel which would theoretically be bright neobong green).

If they were to go along a different route to EMPATHY, I think this album cover by Paris Jones could work well for NCT 2020:

If the background surface was black, a polaroid of all 21 members could be a simple but effective album cover.

In terms of promotional photos, this scene from the WAYV ‘Regular’ MV is my first thought:

Photos taken on a set like this, with all the members dotted about the room and maybe the album title + members’ names repeated across the screens could work well to give off the futuristic NCT vibe.

3. TITLE TRACK / CONCEPT

I can’t create a whole album’s worth of songs, so for the next two sections all the songs mentioned are going to be from existing artists. I’m not trying in anyway to suggest that “NCT would do it better” or that NCT should release the exact songs mentioned - I’m just using these songs to represent the styles I would like to see NCT explore.

Title Track: GETTING CLOSER - SEVENTEEN

I think SVT are a really good example of having a lot of members that all have the opportunity to shine. Getting Closer is that bitch, like the line distribution is spot-on and the choreography is one of my all-time favourites.

Black on Black was mainly instrumental to highlight the performance ability of NCT 2018. Getting Closer is reminiscent of BoB in its powerful nature, but would be able to show NCT 2018′s growth into NCT 2020, with further vocal / rap capabilities showcased alongside the previously established performance talent.

The concepts of BoB and Getting Closer are already similar, so this wouldn’t be anything out of NCT’s / SM’s comfort zone, and would also work towards establishing a dark & powerful ‘brand’ for when all sub-units perform together as one.

Special Stage: UH-OH - (G)-IDLE

I would like to see NCT 2020 do something a little bit different than ‘powerful’ for the special stage. Uh-Oh has a really chilled kinda west-coast vibe that I think NCT are yet to fully explore in any sub-unit but could absolutely pull off. It would be a stage where they could genuinely have fun performing all together.

I imagine the stage being done in a way similar to Growl by EXO in that certain groups of members come onto the stage for different verses, then all come on together for the final chorus.

The styling for Uh-Oh is kinda summer streetwear. The best equivalent I’ve found for a boy group in this style is ATEEZ Wave era.

This shows kinda how I think the styling for this stage should be, in particular Jongho, Yunho, and Mingi. Just think lots of colour, street brands, and denim.

Getting Closer and Uh-Oh are the only songs on the album where I’ve put all 21 members on the same track.

4. TRACKLIST

I have no talent when it comes to album design / composition or anything like that, but I tried to create a sort of theme / flow between the songs I picked for the album. NCT songs I’d liken the overall theme to are ‘Love Song’ from Neo Zone, ‘Love Again’ from Reload, and ‘YESTODAY’ from Empathy.

I’ve used an intro, interlude, and outro to show progression of NCT 2020 through the album, with these 3 songs getting more upbeat one by one. Though extremely cringey, I guess I was trying to emulate them growing happier through being together as a group.

Aside from the two tracks mentioned above that feature all members, the rest of the songs are split into sub-units, whether it be pre-existing unofficial units within NCT or a selection of members I think suit the style of a certain song. I have not included any official NCT sub-units on this album, as that was done in EMPATHY. I’d like this to be one big NCT U album, where we get the members in combinations we’d otherwise never get to hear performing together.

The Tracklist:

INTRO: The Unknown Guest (DEAN)

Members: Xiaojun

Xiaojun is a beyond amazing singer (he is my joint favourite vocalist in NCT). This song has an old feel, it’s almost haunting, and I really think Xiaojun’s voice would suit such a song perfectly. Xiaojun performing an intro of this style alone would open the album well and give him the time to shine he deserves !

Track 1: Getting Closer (SVT)

Members: All

(Explained above)

Track 2: CHILLI (SVT)

Members: Rap Line (Taeyong, Johnny*, WinWin*, Lucas, Mark, Hendery, Jaemin, YangYang, Jeno, Jisung*)

I might have completely forgotten some songs but I don’t think NCT have ever released a rap-heavy song of this style. I would love to see them do a rap song with this sort of relaxed vibe - it would show off diversity in their rapping abilities and would be a fun concept to see.

*I know Johnny, WinWin, and Jisung are in both the vocal and rap lines, but I’ve chosen to include them on the rap line track rather than the vocal line track as I think they suit the vibe of this track better than the vocal track. Plus, it would give the three of them more lines (god knows they need them) if they were on this track rather than with the vocal line :)

Track 3: Uh Oh (G-IDLE)

Members: All

(Explained above)

Track 4: The Truth Untold (BTS)

Members: Vocal Line (Taeil, Yuta, Doyoung, Kun, Ten, Jaehyun, Jungwoo, Xiaojun, Renjun, Haechan, Chenle)

Although NCT has released ballads before, I would love to hear members from different subunits singing together. Like, imagine Renjun, Xiaojun, and Jungwoo on the SAME track - the power. Taeil and Chenle harmonising? Iconic.

Track 5: Spotlight (1the9)

Members: Foreign Swaggers / English-Speaking Line (Johnny, Ten, Jaehyun, Hendery, Xiaojun, Mark, YangYang)

I know Xiaojun, Hendery, and YangYang aren’t technically in the Foreign Swaggers, but I feel like spiritually they are. I wanna see 6 of them causing havoc while Jaehyun spectates (https://youtu.be/acsjfk4cz1U). A song with a playful vibe, not necessarily in English, would suit these members well.

INTERLUDE: Dayfly (DEAN)

Members: Taeil, Taeyong, Kun, Doyoung, Jungwoo

I don’t have any reasoning for why I’ve chosen these specific members for this song other than the fact I think the style suits them well. I think the 5 of them together on an interlude with a relaxed feel would just be a really calming break in the album.

Track 6: Vibe (1Team)

Members: Taeyong, Yuta, Jungwoo, Jeno, Jaemin, Haechan, Jisung

This is quite a broad range of members in terms of age but I don’t think that matters as each of their styles would suit a song like this. A relaxed style and structure similar to the one this song has would allow each of them to shine, as it’s nearly an equal split of rappers to vocalists.

Track 7: Retro Future (Triple H)

Members: Johnny, Ten

Baby Don’t Stop 2.0. I can just imagine these two singing a song like this and having so much fun. A JohnTen duet track is giving the gays (read @incorrectnct ) not only what they want, but what they deserve.

Track 8: Base Line (J-HOPE)

Members: 99 Line (Lucas, Mark, Hendery, Xiaojun)

The 99 line is 3/4 rappers so a song that is rap-heavy in style would best showcase their ability. We’ve heard Mark and Lucas together during EMPATHY era, and Lucas with Hendery and Xiaojun in WAYV, so I have no doubts the 4 would work together. Plus, rapper Xiaojun could be something that we don’t yet have but definitely need.

Track 9: Focus on Me (JUS2)

Members: 97 Line (Jaehyun, WinWin)

These two are made for a sexy concept like the style of this song, and their voices complement each-others’ so well. I always felt Jaehyun was one of the members of 127 WinWin was most comfortable around, so their existing chemistry would make a track together even better.

Track 10: Second Life (SVT)

Members: China Line (Kun, WinWin, Lucas, Hendery, Xiaojun, Renjun, YangYang, Chenle)

They have the range.

Track 11: New Rules (TXT)

Members: 00 Line (Haechan, Renjun, YangYang, Jaemin, Jeno)

A song with a fun feel to it like this is the only way to go for the 00 line. They are almost an even split of rappers and vocalists, so a song like this would allow each member to shine. I know any song with these 5 together would make me smile while listening to it.

OUTRO: Blue Side (J-HOPE)*

Members: Yuta

Imagine if SM gave Yuta his own solo track,, just kidding,,, unless? But for real, Yuta has managed to prove how talented an artist he is despite SM only giving him 2 lines and 8 seconds of screen time each comeback, so imagine how amazing a whole song by him would be.

*Song will be in Japanese.

FINAL THOUGHTS

I tried to split the members evenly between tracks, which I know is unrealistic but is what we want to see (SM please let Mark, Taeyong, and Haechan rest). I’m not sure if we’ll ever get another full group album, I’ve heard some people saying it will be NCT 2021 for 21 members, like the 18 members for NCT 2018. Regardless, making this made me feel happy thinking about the possible interactions and the songs that could come from it.

If you’ve made it this far thank you for sticking with my jumbled thought process. Please message me if you have any thoughts about anything in this post or just about NCT ot21 in general :)

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mattbflatt-loves-starset · 3 years

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The Progression of Failed Love - A STARSET Playlist

Y’all ever make a playlist before? That shit is so much fun. Using the music by your favorite artists and ordering them in such a way that portrays your own idea or story... I love it, and I’ve only just started doing it. It’s a very unique way to creatively express yourself. Now that I’ve hyped my audience up, it’s time to break all of your hearts by sharing my playlist of STARSET songs called “The Progression of Failed Love” which follows the story of a typical young couple who just couldn’t make it work. Yes I know, this is a dumb movie trope told a million times and blah blah blah, but this is my blog so deal with it ya fuckin’ dorks… of course I’m kidding, and in all seriousness, this was the most genuine playlist I was able to make. I have my own personal connection to it, and if you’ve had a relationship before, you’ll most likely find a way to connect to it. I enjoy it, and I hope you do as well.

The playlist’s first three songs in order are “Satellite”, “DIE FOR YOU”, and “Starlight”, and they encompass the honeymoon stage of a budding relationship. Let’s call these songs Act I of this story. “Satellite” to me really embodies the feeling one gets when they first fall for someone. The energy is high and all you can think about is what you would do for this individual, with lyrics that support this idea greatly:

“Satellite! Shine on me tonight!

I will be your gravity, I will stay and never leave…

My satellite! Are you here tonight?

Shine your light and set me free.

Take the darkness out of me.

Shine on me!”

The relationship hasn’t started yet, but the interest is growing like crazy. These lyrics hit hard, check out the rest of them here:

STARSET – Satellite Lyrics

“DIE FOR YOU” is just a more intense version of “Satellite” within the context of this story, but it makes sense because this song represents when the relationship is now official. Both parties have fallen for each other, and the love is starting to run deep. The whole vibe of the song is much more intimate, with a calmer kit part (hot damn Adam Gilbert you are smart with writing your kit parts), but yet the same exact key and even a similar tempo. The songs are so similar, yet so different, and it’s really smart. Kudos to STARSET for this, and as a personal benefit, it makes the story of this playlist flow really well.

Starset - Die For You (Official Audio)

“Starlight” is a very specific moment in time, and marks the end of the honeymoon phase. The couple is stargazing, and the sky is just beautiful. I see many colors and galaxies in the night sky when listening to this song. The only thing is, they aren’t physically together. Their lives have picked up, and while they can’t be with each other at the moment, they still love each other very much, so they stargazed on a phone call. They are sad that they have to spend less time together, but they reassure each other that they love the other person very much, and that they are inseparable. This song has a very special place in my heart, as it’s just a beautiful song that makes me think a lot. I get a little heartsick listening to it, as it makes me think about memories that are dear to me, but it fits this spot perfectly in my playlist story.

Starset - Starlight (Official Lyric Video)

The honeymoon period has now concluded and we are moving into Act II of this story, where problems arise. This act starts with the song “Telepathic”, which has a frustrating feel to me. The song is from the perspective of only one of the characters, as they feel their significant other expects them to be a mind reader and won’t share emotions by just talking about them. As I’m sure a lot of people understand, this is infuriating to deal with, as it just makes people typically want to slam their head through a fuckin’ brick wall. At the same time, this character is very easily read by their significant other, as they wear their heart on their sleeve, making it seem like their lover is… well… “Telepathic”. This brings up insecurity, and arguments ensue. The lyrics support this idea well, for example:

“But you can read my mind

I feel it all the time.

Felt it all around you…

You had me under spell right from the start

I don’t have a telepathic heart.”

STARSET – Telepathic Lyrics

The arguments get worse as we progress into the song “FAULTLINE”. This song has a lot to do with pointing fingers and blaming, as now both lovers in this story are outright arguing with each other a lot, and over stupid shit too. They aren’t handling being apart from each other well and are having a hard time with communication due to insecurity and distance. The vibe of this song fits this mood, as it’s got a sparse but tense groove, and the accompanying guitar/synth parts are rough and a bit grungy. Out of all the songs in this playlist, this one takes 3nd place for the lyrics fitting well into the story, with such snippets as:

“First you gotta know, how to play the victim

Hate to tell ya so, but you repeat the symptoms like an aftershock

And I only wanna make it stop…”

And also:

“Caught me shaking at the site, oh

Caught me quaking in my mind, oh

You’re tripping over every fault of mine

You’re breaking open every single time

It’s never black and white, no

Going seismic out of spite, oh

I never know if it’s your fault or mine

You’re breaking open every single time

Faultline.”

STARSET - FAULTLINE (Official Audio)

Like damn, that entire second snippet is the whole ass chorus. This song fits super well here.

The last song in Act II has some intense, even lustful feelings tied to it, this song being “PERFECT MACHINE”. The couple is desperate to make things work, as they still love each other very much but are really struggling. When they see each other, they engage constantly in what people called “hate-fucking” which ultimately solves nothing, and then fighting after they are done. Yes I know this was a WILD turn out of left field, but this is the story I envision with this playlist, very intense and potentially very real. The song I feel is the entire progression of one… erm… let’s call it a “session” of what was described above. It starts with the lustful feelings I mentioned before, then about one third of the way through the song, the entire feeling changes, becoming very angry and desperate. This song takes 2nd place for lyrics best fitting the story, with the lyrics changing from this:

“Show me your insides, show me your secrets

Show me what you desire… I can fake it”

To this:

“Even you know… even you know, this was all for nothing…”

STARSET - PERFECT MACHINE (Official Audio)

STARSET – PERFECT MACHINE Lyrics

Again, damn bro. I relate to this part of the story the least, as I’ve never experienced something like this, but holy shit that still cuts deep.

Finally, we reach Act III of this story, the end and the aftermath. This act opens up with “Let It Die”, which is the song that marks the inevitable end of this relationship. This song talks a lot about “breathing back life” into something and I feel that marks the end of a relationship very well. The feelings have been lost and it’s very possible that at least one party has moved on, so it needs to end. There’s not much to say about this song, except the one lyric that really made this song claim its spot on this playlist:

“But you told me, if you loved me, let it die”

Starset - Let It Die (Official Audio)

The relationship is now over, and one of the characters has left the narrative. We now enter the mind of the one who was still holding on to feelings. With this, the penultimate song to this playlist is the iconic “My Demons”. This song paints the image of inner demons attacking someone, and how they once had a significant other that would save them from these demons. The song references sickness, demons, needing help, and other color words that really paint the picture of someone mourning the death of love they once had. It is one of STARSET’s most emotionally impactful songs, and every single OG STARSET fan knows this song. This part of the story is the perfect spot for this song, and though I don’t want to copy another batch of lyrics for the purpose of finishing this story, I strongly encourage you to just listen to the song and pay attention to these lyrics. They’re very audible and very emotionally charged.

Starset - My Demons (Official Music Video)

We have finally reached the end, and the song that ends this whole story is “Ricochet”, another one of STARSET’s best songs. I know what I said about not copying another batch of lyrics to this post, but this song wins 1st place for lyrics relating to the story on this playlist, because this song is literally about reflection on a failed relationship and just wanting to see the other person:

“We were one in the same,

Running like moths to the flames,

You’d hang on every word I’d say

But now they only ricochet…

We were falling away,

You left me with a bittersweet taste,

But when I send my heart your way,

It bounces off the walls you made,

Ricochet”

COME. ON. You CANNOT tell me this isn’t the best way to conclude this really sad story. This isn’t the only set of lyrics in the song that paints this picture well, THE WHOLE SONG DOES. Back to the story, time has passed and the remaining character still misses their ex-lover. They’ve tried really hard to rebuild some sort of relationship with them, but it just didn’t work. This song is the final stage of their mourning, and while they know very deep down that it will get better, they need this time to grieve.

Starset - Ricochet (Official Music Video)

STARSET – Ricochet Lyrics

I don't relate to this entire story, but it was sure as hell fun to write. I apologize for any emotional pain that I have caused during the telling of this story, but this is what came to mind when I was creating the playlist. You’re a real one if you made it to the end, this being my longest post yet. I really hope you enjoyed.

Links Used (In Order):

https://genius.com/Starset-satellite-lyrics

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WJxSNbAer9M

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7tiCEp3K3Rs

https://genius.com/Starset-telepathic-lyrics

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MfqVlwetWfY

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=keMBtyjYUPQ

https://genius.com/Starset-perfect-machine-lyrics

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xJtBYAKBByk

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nkll0StZJLA

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SaC0YVaIMno

https://genius.com/Starset-ricochet-lyrics

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eideticmgg · 4 years

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Take It Like A Man

Okay so this is a first draft of the Take It Like a Man scene and it is also my first ever fic so I would greatly appreciate any and all feedback! Also I used most of the lyrics from the bridge because I love this song okay thanks enjoy!!

“I don’t get it. Why are we here?”

“Spencer, you know I love the whole casual Friday vibe you have but you can’t wear a corduroy jacket in court. Especially not in spring!” You teased him, pulling at his old jacket.

“I- Hey! I happen to like this jacket!” Spencer mocked offense, a soft smile creeping onto his face all the same.

“Come on! Don’t just stand there, have a look around. Pick out something nice, okay?” You giggled, rushing around the store picking out shirts that Spencer couldn’t tell he wouldn’t be able to afford.

Looking around the store, Spencer was overwhelmed by how out of place he felt. To be fair, he normally felt that way around y/n but recently whenever she was near him he felt as if his heart was going to beat through his chest.

Spencer picked up a plain shirt that seemed relatively okay but winced looking at the price tag. He put the shirt back, trying to figure out why y/n had brought him to shop where he would have to sacrifice food for two months to afford one jacket.

“Spence! Over here!” Your voice called our over the music playing in the shop. Spencer felt his heart swell with affection at the nickname. He made his way over to you, seeing you stand at the dressing room with a pile of different clothes.

“Okay so, I’ve picked out a few outfits for court but I also picked some cute shirts that I thought you could wear just for the sake of looking nice!” You smiled at him, handing him the first outfit and gesturing for him to enter the cubicle.

Spencer stared at himself in the mirror, wishing he was anywhere else but here right now. He was never confident in his body, how could he be when he was so scrawny. Despite his slim stature, his clothes were almost always a bigger size as most thrift shops don’t carry formal wear in smaller sizes. He never cared much for his physical appearance because he knew he could make up for his shortcomings in the brain department. However there was something about how passionate y/n was about wanting to find him something nice to wear that made him smile. She didn’t want to fix him, she just wanted to make him feel more confident. Too bad he won’t be able to afford any of these clothes.

“Uh... Spence? You alright in there?”

Shit.

“Yeah, sorry I’ll be out in a second!” He threw on a casual shirt and exited the dressing room.

“Do you like it? I really like it, Spencer!” You smiled at him. You looked like a small child, proud that they had dressed their doll so perfectly. Spencer nodding in agreement.

“Try on the rest of the casual ones and then come out in the suit okay? I’m gonna look around for some shoes.”

Spencer nodded before heading back into the dressing room. He tried on another two shirts before giving up, sighing softly.

Looking at himself in the mirror he began to put on the suit. It felt weird to wear one that actually fit him properly.

“Hey, y/n? I-I’m ready to come out in the suit.” Spencer called out, starting to feel nervous. Why was he feeling nervous? It was just y/n. His friend, y/n. Who he saw at her lowest and then helped to become a great lawyer. Because that’s what friends do, and they were definitely friends. Nothing more. Right?

“Ah, come out!” You couldn’t help but feel excited, finally getting to see Spencer in the whole reason you organized the shopping trip. Spencer constantly over-worked himself, rarely taking care of himself and if there was one thing you were passionate about, it was self care. Plus, you like to spend time with your favorite genius, so it’s really a win-win.

Spencer slowly opened the door, walking over to you in front of the full length mirror.

“Woah...” You both breathed out.

Spencer was nearly unrecognizable in the suit. Gone was the scrawny kid who started college when he was 12, standing in front of them was a confident young man.

“I look like Warner.” Spencer grimaced, wondering if that was your plan the whole time. He stared at your reflection, trying to gauge your reaction

“But it’s just me.” You smiled softly.

“That’s the best part. Sure, the outside is new but now it just reflects what’s already inside of you. Couldn’t change that if I wanted to.” You grinned bumping his shoulder gently. “Which I do not.”

“Thank you...” Spencer gave a small smile to you, still trying to get used to his reflection. Throughout his whole life Spencer has been told he needed to change his personality if he ever to fit in. His father, his teachers, his peers all hated his ramblings and constant use of statistics. Their comments eventually led to Spencer doing his best to just not talk to them. That wasn’t very hard as none of them actually wanted him to speak to him. But now, right next to him was someone that didn’t want him to change. That for the first time liked him. All of him. Not just the fact that he was smart and seemed to know the answer to everything. “But I can’t afford this. Any of this...”

“That’s okay, I’ve got it. Spence, this isn’t just a gift. This is payment in kind. If it wasn’t for you I wouldn’t be here right now. It was you that saw behind all this blonde to my mind.” You curled a lock of your blonde hair around your finger, a smile gracing your face. “And I’ll never be able to thank you enough for helping me, Spencer. You really are the best thing that’s happened to me here.” You grinned at him, gently putting your hand on his shoulder to turn him so you were now face to face. Looking him up and down one last time you beamed at him.

“Okay we have to buy this, I mean look at you! Spencer, you look hot! Is he not hot?” You asked the sales assistant, laughing.

Did you just say hot? Never in his entire life has Spencer Reid been described as hot. He’s never had any kind of positive comment made about his physical appearance. And for the first time, Spencer is truly speechless, the only thing he can do is blush deeply before turning back into the dressing room.

He changed back into his own clothes, grateful for the comfort they provided. He brought out the pile of clothes and met you at the till. He felt an overwhelming sense of guilt hit him as the cashier revealed the total but you seemed completely unfazed by what he considered an egregious amount for so few items. You smiled at him reassuringly before handing him the bag.

“For the new, more fashionable Spencer Reid!” You smiled at him, chuckling slightly at the growing blush on his face. He was cute when he blushed. When did Spencer get so cute? More importantly, when did he get so hot? Woah, those are not appropriate thoughts to be having about Spencer, y/n.

“Come on!” You said, quickly changing the subject. “I’m gonna go get an iced coffee, you want something?”

“Oh, uh, no thanks. I think I’ve spent more money today than I have in my entire life.” Spencer stammered out, laughing slightly at his own joke.

“Well, you know you didn’t actually spend any money today...” You teased him, a smirk spreading onto your face.

“Please don’t remind me. You know I can pay you back some of it. It might take me a while but I prom-“

“Spencer!” You cut him off promptly.

“I was just joking. You are not paying me back because you deserve this. Honestly. It’s the least I could do for all the hours you’ve spent tutoring me.” You smiled, touching his arm softly.

Both of your eyes drifted to your hand on his arm before meeting. You both jumped back slightly, not entirely sure what the feeling you were both experiencing was. Both of you froze, unsure what to do or say after a surprisingly intimate moment.

“I was actually looking over my notes from State of Indiana v. Hurn and I found some interesting similarities between that and...” Spencer broke the silence, rambling on about the similarities between two cases. You smiled fondly at him, chiming in a few times with your own points. Still you couldn’t stop your mind from wondering. More specifically you couldn’t stop thinking about how handsome Spencer looked in his suit.

#spencer reid x reader #spencer reid fanfiction #spencer reid x oc #spencer reid #spencer reid x y/n #legally blonde! spencer #spencer reid fanfic #spencer reid imagine #spencer reid oneshot

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idontblushsrry · 3 years

Text

Do You Know That I Do Love You

Chapter 1: Do You Still Think Of Me Fondly?

Next>

Word Count:

Warnings: Some swearing, smut in later chapters

A/N: This is purely self indulgent at this point. I will get my black nobility/courtly romance fic and it just so happens to be with Han Ju-Do from Yona of the Dawn (great show if you ask me I think everyone should watch it and that it deserves more but, whateverrr) I don’t know how many chapters this is going to have, I thought 2 but maybe I’ll do 3 or 4 it all depends on what I feel like is gonna complete the story the best. Reader is black, she has a Korean last name to match with the rest of the show characters. Spoilers ahead for parts of Yona Of The Dawn anime/manga

A/N Pt.2: This is based off of the concept of courtly love but w tweaks bcus I have like no ability to stick with angst permanently, like if asked nicely, I’ll do a happy ending (Also Reader and Ju-do are both single so). This fic is also based of this song if you want to get into the vibe.

You’d been told tales of the Crimson Dragon Castle just nothing could’ve compared to the majesty of seeing it in person. The gates opened and guards announced your arrival as your carriage pulled inside. You stared in awe at the sheer size of it while your attendants whispered something to each other that you didn’t quite pick up on.

“What was that?”

You turned and your attendants immediately went silent, squirming and failing to meet your gaze each time you tried to capture them in it.

“Nothing milady just the talk of lowly servants that you shouldn’t concern yourself with.”

You could tell though from the guilt in her tone and the way the other attendant looked as though you’d have her thrown out if you heard what she said that you knew they were discussing the reason you’d even come to the palace. You were much too old to be an unmarried woman and the constant rumours of your status ranged in believability, the most outrageous being that you were a succubus and having a husband would get in the way of your appetites.

When you’d heard it, that made you cackle because you were the furthest thing from a succubus.

It’s not like you felt ashamed of being a virgin, you were a grown woman after all, and it’s not as though you were the sole heir to your family’s name. You had plenty of siblings to carry on the family name. The issue lied in the fact that you were the oldest, your family tradition dictated that none shall marry before the oldest and as such you’d been on the receiving end of anger from your siblings, parents, potential suitors, and all in between.

When your father first proposed the idea of marriage to you, many of your siblings were still too young to care or remember. You could feel the concern coming from both of your parents as they urged you to meet with suitors from other clans and families. And you could feel their growing rage as you rejected one after another.

Now nearing two decades later, your siblings, the ones who were unconcerned with your marital status so long ago were now resentful of you. Many of them had approached you individually and together with their grievances, claiming you were holding the family back and restraining them from true love, all the things you’d heard before.

They’d brought those same complaints to father and he brought up the idea of a palace visit to you. No not in so few words nor with such direct intent but the message was there. He’d brought the idea up while you fed the fish in your private reserve.

‘I think that this place is too stifling of your abilities my dear. I’d like for you to go to the Crimson Dragon Palace in my stead, I’m getting rather old and the whole thing is nothing but a diplomatic affair anyways, I’m sure you can handle it.’ You were going to turn down his offer. Not consciously out of spite but because you knew what he wanted you to do. His words seemed like the ones of a trusting father but the undertone of ‘return with a fiancé or I’ll disown you’ rang clear as a bell through your head. You may have been stubborn but you weren’t a fool, your family had grown impatient with your antics and if this behavior continued, they’d send you packing without so much as a goodbye.

You’d contemplated that idea and thought up the pros and cons to being disowned. It wasn’t until you heard two maids whispering outside your room that night that you made your decision.

‘Poor Master Seong I heard that Lady (Y/N) is preventing him from meeting his heirs.’

‘Eh? What do you mean, how could she do that?’

‘She refuses to let any of her siblings get married and as the next clan head, any marriages from her siblings that occur before her own are forbidden.’

‘Wow! Really, then why won’t she just get married already?’

‘Who knows.’

By the following night you were in a carriage on your way to the castle. Coincidentally with the two maids that spoke ill of you that night. It seems that they still haven’t gained the ability to shut up even when it’s in their best interest.

The carriage pulled up to the guest exit and you didn’t have to wait long before the carriage was opened by one of the palace servants.

“Welcome Lady Seong”

You were rushed to yet another carriage that would take you to your quarters while your attendants followed someone else to the servants’ quarters. For the first time in the weeks it’d taken you to travel here, you could feel yourself begin to truly relax. The servant next to you was stiff with rigid and tense shoulders especially compared to your unladylike and unrefined composure. But, they were quiet. You weren’t going to look a gift horse in the mouth and you didn’t particularly feel like talking to ease the tension in the carriage, so, you ignored it. Most of it was coming from the servant not knowing how to react to you anyways.

You closed your eyes to think of the last time you felt truly happy and all your defeated mind could conjure was an image of a chubby outstretched hand handing you a six-petaled flower.

“Milady? We’ve arrived at your quarters.”

You stepped out of the dark carriage into the courtyard of the place you’d be staying. Only to find that this courtyard was slightly nicer than you’d expected a standard nobles courtyard to be. There was an abundance of flowers, rocks lining the foliage. A bridge that spanned a small river that begun with a waterfall. Birds, a gazebo lined with jewels in the far corner, and the fragrant scent of jasmine flowers.

The servant, seemingly unfazed by the extravagance, urged you to follow her with a motion of her head. Her feet leading you through the courtyard with practiced expertise, you managed to keep up with her strides by clutching your dress up some and resisting the urge to gawk at every element passing you by.

She brought you to a spacious room similarly sized as the room you slept in back home. The room was relatively bare save for a large bed pressed against the wall in the center of the room, a wardrobe, vanity and an incense holder among other things.

She turned to you and bowed before turning to leave. “Before you leave, what’s your name?”, she froze as though she wasn’t expecting you to actually speak to her. She turned back to you with a close eyed smile.

“My name? It’s Ha-Neul”

You’d received the first and arguably the most difficult of your diplomatic duties when within 3 days of your stay, you were being summoned by King Suwon. While the letter came as a shock to you, you nearly had a heart attack when you learned you’d be meeting in the King’s personal tea gardens. You’d take it as a compliment, however, you were 1) essentially all alone with no one to back you up should you fail to be adept at conversation and 2) you’d only met the new king as a boy and in passing, you were somewhat underprepared and knew nothing more of him than what you’d heard in passing.

‘No. Don’t think like that (Y/N)’, you looked at your reflection in the mirror, your braids hung down, the tight coils of your hair wrapped up inside of them as they hung down from your scalp to frame your face. ‘You are more than capable, if it weren’t for your intelligence, you wouldn’t have made it this far. You can do this.’ You took a look at your outfit. It was unfit to meet the king. But before you could begin working yourself up into another nervous tizzy, Ha-neul knocked on your door, her consistent rapping against it breaking you out of your anxious reverie.

Ha-Neul was truly a miracle worker. She’d managed to make your previously tense body appear completely calm and put together with a few twists of her wrists and some careful thought into what she’d have you wear to meet with the king.

By the time the carriage had stopped, the anxiety in your gut had settled to a deep thrum that would remind you of its presence at the very center of your being but wouldn’t seize control of your body. This mercy provided by your anxiety allowed you to put one foot in front of the other like you’d done since you were a child, albeit with a more conscious effort.

You’re led by a flurry of servants and guards to where Suwon was sitting so tranquilly in his tea gardens. It was amazing how much he’d grown since you’d last seen him but those same features he had as a child seemed to have aged with his spirit. You didn’t know why but you got this deep guttural feeling that he’d done something akin to a betrayal of himself. It showed oh so subtly in the way he drank his tea with an air of practiced indifference that he tried to cover with a layer of oversaturated artificial happiness.

“Lady Seong, it’s good to see you. I hope your quarters are to your liking.”

Showtime.

You bowed respectfully to him before replying, “Yes, the room is lovely and even more so the courtyard. I’d love to speak with the person who designed it. How have you been your majesty?”

You’d hoped flattery would work with him, all your cues were being taken from him but it was near impossible to get a read on him. You kept your tone and demeanor light and cheery but eve still that was all he was giving you. It was like he was trying to gauge you at the same time.

Oh, you realized embarrassingly belatedly, this is a test.

The new king couldn’t afford any threats to his power and securing allyship while weeding out untrustworthy people was the most effective way for him to achieve that in lieu of starting a full-scale war.

But Kouka didn’t need that.

Since you were attending in your father’s stead, he’s likely assumed that you’re the new head of your clan, ‘If only he knew’.

Well, if it’s a test he wants then a test he’ll get. Two could play that game and you always were very good at mind games.

It feels as though it’s been about 30 minutes of you and King Suwon exchanging formalities, trying to see who’d crack. But finally, the tea and snack get delivered and you realize that for now, you’d reached a stalemate with the King. You could count it as a win but judging from the fact you still couldn’t tell what he was thinking, you mentally conceded to the standstill with him, and from the sigh he let out it seems he’s resigned himself to the same fate.

“Let’s eat then shall we.” he says good-naturedly, like the careful tension of your previous exchange never happened, so you nod in agreement. Waiting for him to take the first bite and sip before following suit. You close your eyes and simply enjoy the gentle floral taste and aroma of the tea. You take a moment of respite in the tea and neglect your surroundings for a moment.

You hear big clunky footsteps hurry their way down the hallway you and Suwon are staying in before, “My King, I apologize for my lateness, and while inexcusable, I hope that you can forgive me.”

You recognize that voice, you move to open your eyes at the same time the man stands up and before King Suwon can get his answer out, you interrupt him with “Ju...do?”

He looks down at you with a sneer looking ready to give you a tongue- lashing for interrupting the King and calling him out of his station. Before a look of recognition flashes in his eyes and he looks away hurriedly, calling your name with a formal “Lady Seong, I didn’t know you were at the castle."

Ok, ouch. Few things hurt worse than the person you’d spent an embarrassing amount of time fawning over as a teenager (and young adult) dismissing you with such a dismissive and cold formality.

You’d already fucked up by interrupting the King and you weren’t about to fuck up again by not responding to a General when directly addressed by one. “I didn’t know you were at the castle either, General.” If you were nothing more than a formality to him, then he’d be nothing more than a formality to you.

Yes you were aware of how petty and flimsy that logic was. He hadn’t seen you in years, of course he was going to be cordial with you. But the other part of you, the person who was heartbroken by the same man who stood in front of you right now, someone that you thought you buried long ago, hoped that calling him General hurt just as much as hearing him call you anything but (Y/N).

#yona of the dawn imagines #black reader #x black reader #han judo #han judo yona of the dawn #akatsuki no yona #general judo x reader #han judo x reader #yona of the dawn x reader #general judo #general han judo #pls lmk if yall like this #or if you watch yotd #there isnt a really big fandom for it and i am searching pls #idontblushsrry #x reader #anime imagines #imagines #smut

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asmileyoucouldbottle · 4 years

Text

She’s Only Angel- Osby

It’s been so long since I wrote for them 🥺💕 I got an anon ask on my main blog, @phobidawg to write Oscar and Ruby baking ages ago, but I had ~ no motivation ~ (ew.) Sorry it took so long, but it’s here! Enjoy :D

Reblogs super appreciated <333

Word Count: 1758

~*~

Throwing open the door, Ruby welcomed Oscar in. He held up his bag of supplies, and she whooped, giving him a bright smile.

“I have very little experience cooking, just a warning.” Ruby cautioned as Oscar settled his bag on the counter.

“Cooking?” Oscar’s eyebrows furrowed in slight worry.

“Yeah-”

“I thought we were baking…” Oscar trailed off.

“I told you my mom would be using the oven for bread, so we’d have to work with the stovetop.”

“Uh-oh.” Oscar pulled out the supplies for lemon shortbread cookies out of his bag. He noticed Ruby couldn't help but look touched, even if he was completely incapable.

She held up the bag, squinting at it. “Maybe we could…. cook them on the stove?” Ruby suggested dubiously.

“Fried cookie dough!” Oscar exclaimed. He was like, 92.36 percent sure that’s how they did it at the fairs. The salt-and-peppered girl brightened and gave a little hop. “Oooh! Great idea!” His stomach did a little leap at its own, and he ducked to hide the effect she had on him.

With renewed purpose, Ruby took the bag of flour and poured it into a big bowl. Oscar peered over her shoulder, and they were both met with a faceful of flour.

Eyes closed and mouth open in shock, Oscar stumbled back from the bowl. He rubbed at his eyes as Ruby expertly wiped off the flour with a cloth beside her. Noticing him struggling, she turned to wipe the flour off his eyes as well, and he was suddenly struggling with trying not to notice how close their faces were.

“Uh, sorry- I should’ve warned you about that.” She laughed, cheeks tinged pink. Oscar looked at her incredulously. “That’s a normal occurrence?” He exclaimed. She nodded, and he caught the slight teasing glint in her eye.

“Don’t you use cups to measure it in or something like that?” He asked.

“Umm… nope. It’s all just a gut feeling you know?” Oscar did not know, and he was pretty sure didn’t either. He caught her eye, expertly raising an eyebrow, and she batted his shoulder with her flour covered hand. He jumped back. “Okay, okay captain, whatever you say! Just don’t flour my shirt.”

“I say…” Ruby considered, before picking up the sugar.

“Incoming!” Oscar leaned back as she poured some into the bowl. It didn’t poof up like the flour, though she still got a few flecks on her lashes. Oscar though it looked kinda pretty. Actually, despite being covered in flour, Oscar thought she looked great. Impulsively, he leaned over to kiss her cheek.

Surprised, she turned at him with an abashed smile. “Now your lips are all white” She pointed out with a giggle, and Oscar could see her flush a tiny bit where the flour was thinner. He pursed them like a fish, and she giggled again, before giving them a peck. Oscar grinned, incredibly pleased.

“Focus!” She snapped her flour covered fingers in his face for emphasis, sending a cloud over his nose. He sneezed, inhaling flour as he laughed.

“I present to you the baking soda…” Oscar showcased the little tin dramatically before handing it to Ruby. She took a pinch and sprinkled it in, and proceeded to take five more. Oscar raised his eyebrows once again. “I can’t tell if that was another one of those ‘gut’ things or actually pre-determined.”

“Well it’s normally 3, but I think I may have added a little more flour than usual.” Ruby explained. Oscar was now entirely certain she did not know what she was doing.

“Baking powder!” She demanded, flourishing a hand in his direction. He plopped the little container in her hand as requested.

“Thank you.” She took two pinches, and tossed it to the side.

“Now we mix.” Oscar cheered, and grabbed a whisk. Ruby got a wooden spoon, and together they mixed it, bumping elbows and giving each other teasing shoves.

The wet mixture went on similarly, though cracking the eggs was a sight. Oscar gave it a go, and cracked it very well… in his hand. Then came take two, where for some unfathomable reason the yolk ended up outside of the bowl and the shells and whites in They had to put the operation on hold to pick out as much shell as they could, and Oscar had a suspicion that Ruby was tossing little pieces in his hair when he wasn’t looking. On his third try he managed to get it in with a limited amount of shell added. He wanted to take it out, but after spending 10 minutes removing all the pieces from the second one, Ruby insisted that some shell adds “delectable crunch.” “Hold up!”

Oscar looked up from where he was throwing out the egg shells. He looked towards Ruby, who had shouted. “What’s wrong?”

“I think we were supposed to add the sugar to the egg mix, not the flour.” Ruby was frowning at the bowls, and Oscar had a sudden sinking fear. “Are they ruined?!” He ran to the counter, desperately looking for a sign. If there was no hope for them, Oscar was certain he wouldn’t survive the heartbreak.

A bit alarmed, Ruby put a hand on his arm. “I’m sure it’s fine, they’re all going to the same place anyways.”

Together they combined the bowl, with Oscar slowly adding in the wet mix while Ruby mixed it all together. There was a crease between her eyes, squinted in concentration, and her eyebrows were dusty white with flour. He felt a little bit of happiness settle into his chest, just from being here with her.

When he’d finished pouring, Ruby nudged him and gestured to the bowl with butter and eggs. “This is your chance to show off your impressive muscles.”

His elated grin melted away into a slight look of disgust. “You mean I have to knead that… like…” He imitated a squishing motion with his hands.

“Um, yeah.” Ruby looked at him quizzically, and his face was grossed out. He recognized the twist of her features as they resisted the urge to laugh, and slid the bowl back towards her. She gave him a look, and he felt reluctant to admit that he was in fact a tiny bit uneasy with the thought of kneading the dough.

Sighing with exaggerated drama, she rolled up her sleeves. “I supposed I’ll have to show off my incredible strength first.” Oscar was more than happy to let her squish the bowl of egg, butter, and flour, and everything else for him, and he could tell that she didn’t mind the chance to exhibit her muscles. Though Oscar was partial to his own upper body strength, he had to admit that she was very fit as well.

Ruby jabbed at the bowl with the wooden spoon a few times, attempted to mix it with the whisk, and when none of it proved effective, stuck her hands to squish it all together.

Not envying her one bit, Oscar fiddled with the radio behind them. He heard what sounded like a choir, made a face, and went to change it.

“Wait go back!” Ruby called excitedly. Oscar, confused, skipped back to the choir- which was rising in pitch.

“Ohmyskies this was like my childhood.” She held up a finger, telling him to wait, when suddenly the crescendo stopped. Ruby, and the sudden man, let out an enthusiastic “HEY HEY!”

Oscar suddenly recognized the song. “Only Angel!” Ruby explained, as he grabbed a spoon and started jamming. “Harry Styles was my pre-teen obsession.” She laughed, a tiny blush on her nose, starting to dance. “He was an old singer from before the Age of Anarchy.” Oscar nodded, vibing. The blush on her nose was also distractingly cute, and he was sad when she turned back around.

“Only Angel- woohoo!” They sang together, Ruby shimmying her feet while continuing to occasionally knead.

He couldn’t decide whether his spoon was a mic or a guitar, so it ended up being both. Ruby watched him from the corner of her eyes, muffling laughter as he sang out of the rounded part of the spoon while “strumming” the stick. Oscar thought he actually sounded pretty good in the moments that he tried- though most of it was exaggerated for the ‘funny factor.’

The mix was now completely doughy, so she rinsed her hands and dried them with a hand towel while Oscar continued to sing into his spoon.

As soon as her hands were dry, Oscar threw his spoon over his shoulder and reached over to pull her in a spin. Ruby yelped in surprise, but it quickly turned into a laugh. One hand on his cane and the other in hers, he started to lead some sort of swing dance that was completely inappropriate with the music, but fun all the same. Ruby couldn’t stay steady on her feet for her life, and tripped every other second, but Oscar flawlessly led them on.

They swung, spun, and shimmied across the kitchen, bubbling laughter and the squeaking of converse on tiles merging with the music. Their eyes met, and faces complete with matching grins, and Oscar felt a rush in the pit of his stomach.

“She’s an angel, woohoo. Only angel, woohoo-” Oscar couldn’t help but agree, as he swung Ruby in a circle. His own complete happiness was reflected in her gaze, as they turned in circles and moved their feet with enthusiasm making up for lack of skill. As the song reached its peak, Ruby tilted up on tiptoe and kissed him.

Though he hadn’t realized it, this was what Oscar had been waiting for the entire day. He settled his cane against a counter and slid the arm around her back, their other hands still intertwined. Ruby smiled against him, and he was momentarily concerned that he’d swallowed one of Danna’s lepidopterans and it was having a party in his stomach. As the last chords of the song faded out into the echoing choir, Ruby lowered back down to standing, fingers still entwined in his.

Oscar looked at her with a heartsick grin, and Ruby couldn’t help but return it- even as she stepped back. “Remember, we still have cookies to fry!” She announced, turning on the stove. Oscar brought the bowl over to the stove, his step complete with a new bounce. The two of them shared a grin, and Oscar was left wondering by what luck of fate he’d ended up with such a good lot in life.

#osby #tuckva #renegades trilogy #marissa meyer #renegades fanfic #renegades fanfiction #my fanfic #my renegades fic #oscar silva #ruby tucker #baking #fluff #dot talk #request: anon #renegades #oscar x ruby #ruby x oscar

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my-happy-little-bean · 4 years

Text

Picnics in the Imagination

pairings: no romantic ones! just a nice LAMP fic :) words: 3294 warnings: mild swearing, insecurity, slight hurt/comfort vibes

summary:

Everyone stared at those two bees in front of them; what were they doing?

Or: the sides share a moment in the Imagination.

a/n- hello! pls excuse this like, weird character study of a one shot heh. i have been having trouble with characterization, so i guess my way to solve that was to,,,write solely based on characterization lol. it was good practice, and even if it’s a bit rough, i still hope you enjoy it :)

read on ao3~

---------

There were two bees fighting in front of him.

They were about seven feet away, and he decided that he should be able to outrun them if they decided to team up against him; or worse, if they were going to attract some equally-terrifying friends. But for the time being, they seemed like they were too wrapped up in trying to murder each other to even notice him.

It made Virgil wonder why Roman did stuff like that; why he would create a world so beautiful, only to have it destroy itself. He wondered if the self-inflicted drama was some stupid way of him validating his own strength or whatever.

Or maybe it was only this destructive when Virgil was here.

It wasn’t too far-fetched of an idea. That was why it took two and a half weeks to convince Virgil to even take a step into the Imagination again, let alone sit down in it and eat sandwiches.

Though, who could really blame him? He wasn’t meant to exist here, where everything was all special and breathtaking and make-believe. It was literally everything he wasn’t. The last time he was here, it had seemed like the Imagination was actively trying to push him out via a million tiny goblins.

(Virgil couldn’t help but shudder at the memory of stuffing them all in a box, frantically searching for the key to trap them there forever before they set off again and ruin someone else’s hat.)

And even if it was okay for him to be here, there wasn’t much for him to do. No one wanted to imagine the storms Virgil found himself under, anyway. After all, the things Roman triumphantly held on the ends of his sword were from monsters Virgil embodied. The grass he stepped on literally burned at the tips if he stood on it for too long.

So why did he feel so...so safe?

Logan had told him once that the Imagination responded to everyone who stepped into its territory. It was supposed to be reassurance, but it was something that scared Virgil the most; that something could reflect the heavy static he could barely walk across everyday. And the first few times he was here, it did.

But now, the Imagination felt like a weighted blanket; almost suffocating at first, but gave way to the unfamiliar feeling of a hug. If he closed his eyes for a second, he could hear a distant thunderstorm coming from who-knows-where; a gentle memory of the only natural disaster he found comfort in. And the grass he stepped would burn, yes, but not all the time now; and it would always resolve itself anyway by bringing to light a small, black rose from the ashes.

His place in the Imagination today only reminded him of the effort everyone was willing to put forth for him; that everything was slowly getting used to the fact that he wasn’t some leech latching onto the sun. Roman eased the worries of his creation, one that had once despised him and all he was; and then eased the worries of Virgil, who didn’t believe he could finally be anything other than the bad guy. Logan made the plans—he always made the plans—and Patton…

Well, Patton tried everything.

He took a sip from his tea and set it aside, pulling his hood over his head and curling up on Patton’s lap. He heard the side giggle and felt him push his hood back ever-so slightly; just to scratch idly behind his ear and braid his fingers through his hair.

And Virgil let him.

Besides, he was too wrapped up in another thought to really care much; the thought that he wasn’t in the moment enough that the moment would pass him by before he could properly appreciate it. He couldn’t help but think about how everyone would eventually pack their things when his storm finally came around. He picked at the sharp grass beside him, scared that it would all go away somehow when he finally– finally– woke up from this dream.

He couldn’t help but look up at the bright blue skies above him.

Virgil sighed, chewing his bottom lip nervously. The Imagination, even as a concept, was so daunting. It stretched so far beyond him that it pretty much scared him shitless. The clouds looked like they could fall on him at any given second, and the bees—as pretty as they are— were still fighting; who’s to say they couldn’t hurt him too?

But it was beautiful.

And he was here.

Virgil closed his eyes and heard the soft sound of rain, far far away.

And when he opened his eyes, he saw Roman,

who was shaking his head at him with a knowing smile.

---

Roman couldn’t help but beam as he watched the two bees in front of him dance, a harmonious waltz above the lush, green grass they grew. Logan could say anything he wanted about the Imagination; the real world could never compare to all of this.

Or at least, that’s what Roman used to think.

Truth be told, the Imagination was only this beautiful when Thomas was satisfied. For the most part, Roman would be running around, dousing fires– literal fires– in every direction. He’d end his days without really ending them, fighting monsters to make his world flawless when the sun rose. This picnic was actually the first time he really stood still in the Imagination since…well, since the Great Goblin Incident of 2019; though that was less of a wake-up call and more of an unwelcome surprise.

(Roman wasn’t able to get the goo out of his hair for weeks.)

And he took great pride in how special his creation was. After all, he made it — and he was pretty awesome. He was able to plant seeds in Thomas’s mind and thus grow a beautiful, magnificent garden. He grew so many gardens actually. He’d grow them left and right, without much of a thought. Anything to spruce up the place.

But there were other days when the Imagination would claw at him for more– for something else. It would grab his ankles as he walked and drag him through the ground when he least expected it, begging him for a new garden; a new village; a new adventure; a new anything.

And at some point, the Imagination became his office. Sure, it was a place Roman would escape to so he could build a tower to hide in when the real world got too much. But it was also a place that Roman would eventually give into; one that would force him to stay the night so he could finish that thing– there was always that one thing.

It was where he would fight Anxiety and win. It was where Morality would cheer for him and carry him on his shoulders with glee. It was where Logic didn’t exist.

It was a place where Roman was everyone’s hero; where everyone needed Creativity.

Not today, though.

Today, the sun glowed bright in the crystal-clear skies without him. He didn’t need the birds to sing him ballads, and he didn’t need the squirrels to care about him all that much. And he would come here to work, yes; but he’d come here to appreciate his work as well.

Nowadays, Patton, Virgil, even Logan appreciated his work alongside him. They saw beauty in every crack Roman would dwell over; saw love and care in each one of his masterpieces. They even took the time to appreciate the gruelling effort that bled through his creation and made sure he was resting– actually resting– when he was done for the day.

And he vowed to repay their love — even if they insisted that he didn’t need to. A glorious battle, perhaps! He could put himself in danger for them, just to show them he would. He could even wage a war with the feelings the others held too close to their chests, those feelings embodied as gruesome monsters and foe, and he would win. Every time.

Because Roman could never lose. Not with them by his side.

He looked around him with a bright smile and a dawning realization, one that he came across a thousand times, nowadays:

The realization that he was surrounded by everything he could ever need.

Roman finished another song on his ukulele and Patton burst into applause. Logan simply nodded at his performance, flipping through another page of the book Roman recommended to him. Virgil just pulled his hoodie over his head and curled up in Patton’s lap.

Poor storm-cloud. He almost felt sad watching him. A part of him would always be jaded by the fact that he ever hurt Virgil.

Roman stood up and walked a few feet away from everyone else, looking off into the distance before closing his eyes. He thought for a little while, and then sent the wind away to bring back the sound of rain and sprinkle it over their heads.

That would hopefully help.

He turned around and looked at the rest of his family. For a moment, everything seemed to freeze. He could feel the grass tickle his feet, as if it were planning to lift him off the ground any second now. A cool breeze weaved itself through his hair and when they dropped off the sound of rain, they picked up the song Roman played to spread it across the land.

He looked up at the sky and watched the birds soar above them,

and thought about how his creation no longer hated him.

He then met Virgil’s eyes, and wondered if he felt the same thing.

Nothing can hurt you here, Roman thought. Not anymore.

---

Swarming was a natural process in the life of a honey bee colony. It was a method of propagation; one that occurred in response to crowding within the colony. If a bee was huddled close to another, it was most likely that they were in the beginning phases of attracting a swarm.

Perhaps that is what those two bees were doing in front of them.

How fascinating.

Logan took a break from reading to take in his surroundings. Roman must have dedicated a respectable amount of time to making the Imagination so faithful to real life. The way each tree was carved in patterns unlike each other, the way the waters seemed to move endlessly and not on a loop.

He knew they were not real. None of them were. So it was interesting to think that not one part of Roman’s world was fabricated in a way that was mechanical and half-hearted; but was instead crafted with such caution and care. Every grass in its own, respective place; every flower grown for a reason.

Logan had made numerous visits to the Imagination in the past; for research purposes, more often than not. Well, other than the dreadful incident with the exploding goblins; though his presence in the whole ordeal was the by-product of an untimely coincidence.

He had interviewed Roman countless times to learn more about this place, but he was yet to leave with an unbiased point of view. Roman would not contribute many useful points to their discussions, choosing to speak only in fanciful, unhelpful metaphors. All he would say about the Imagination was that it merely existed; and it existed so beautifully that it did not need much explanation.

Everything was there for a reason he could not explain.

He had compiled a few notes based on his own extrapolations and observations; consuming knowledge he would then pass onto Thomas so that he could better understand himself (or onto Virgil, to ease his trepidation towards Roman’s creation).

However, he had never really taken the time to just...sit in it.

There were so many creatures and biomes, even cities; all nestled safely underneath the boundless shelter of the Imagination. And the sky was always stunning, no matter the weather. He wondered if Roman would allow him into this strange place more often for recreational purposes. He wondered if Roman would even enjoy his company.

The picnic, of course, was Patton’s idea. It was his way of “bonding” with everyone. Patton had many ideas of what ‘bonding’ looked like — weekly onesie-and-movie nights, having dinner together (even if they did not need to consume food), bi-weekly board game nights, et cetera. With so many options, Logan was not quite sure why Patton found the need to spend even more time with him.

He was not blind to the fact that his presence was not arbitrary. Really, his only function was to present knowledge when needed, then allow the others to use that knowledge in order to make Thomas...well, content. If anyone were to benefit from Patton’s many “family excursions”, it was Virgil. His attempts of reassuring the anxious side paled in comparison to Patton’s efforts.

Logan, unlike the rest of them, did not need love or affection; nor was it necessary that he ‘bonded’ with anyone. He just needed to exist for everyone and live to exist for as long as he could.

He was not real, anyway.

(Though, the thought haunted him far more than he would like to admit.)

He snuck a brief glance at Patton, who was enthralled by Roman’s performance under the sun. It was almost as if the sunshine in the Imagination folded itself around him; like he was the one keeping it warm.

Patton seemed to thrive in the Imagination; and for good reason, too. He was everything the Imagination was; a safe haven, a home, alive. He could extend the observation to Roman, even Virgil. They all belonged here, rested on the grass underneath the brilliant sun.

Logan...did as well.

The thought was hesitant—illogically so—but it was reassuring enough that it was there. Normally, he would think the opposite, but his counterparts only reassured him that that was not the case. He really did belong here, on the same pedestal as them; for reasons unrelated to work.

He was a part of their silly...loving family.

And they were real enough; real enough that he was able to absentmindedly hold Patton’s hand as he coddled Virgil on his lap. He was real enough to look at Roman work his magic in this strange wonder of a world and feel a sense of pride for him.

He was real enough to feel close with them; even though there were times when it felt like he was better off uninvited.

Perhaps this was the meaning behind Patton’s madness. Perhaps it was his way of reassuring him that he, like the rest of the sides, were just simply loved; unconditionally and without a doubt. It is a feeling that, surprisingly enough, Logan held close to him.

No amount of research would ever be able to tell him why.

He sighed, going back to his book and flipping to the next page. The Imagination, at the end of the day, was simply an enigma; constructed by weird science and magic alike.

But his family...well, they turned the Imagination into a reminder of how special existence was; how delicate the universe crafted each and every one of them.

How purposeful it was when creating him.

---

Aww, look at those bees playin’ with each other, Patton thought happily to himself. What good friends they are!

The Imagination was un-bee-lievable. The fact that his kiddo made the whole thing himself? He couldn’t imagine how difficult it must have been! He was so proud of him.

He was proud of everyone, really; which was precisely why he planned this picnic! Roman created such a beautiful place, Logan worked so hard, and Virgil...well, he had finally said yes.

And besides, it was just nice. For once, there was nothing to do. No difficult thinking, no one to fight. It was just him and his family, sitting under the big, blue sky.

Surprisingly enough, this was the first time Patton ever visited the Imagination when it was sunny. More often than not, Patton would visit the Imagination after-hours; sneak in when he knew everyone was asleep. Most of the time, he’d get caught by Roman; who was just as restless as him, yet more curious as to why he was there. Patton would never tell him the real reason, though — only saying that he wanted to check in on him. It wasn’t really a lie, anyway. It was just the right thing to do.

The Imagination was different in the night. Patton was sure that he was one of the only other sides to have seen it. It felt more like an ode to Thomas’s youth; the years when he would tape glow-in-the-dark stars to his ceiling and try to catch fireflies in mason jars. Each daisy seemed to sway in the warm sense of familiarity the wind carried; and the ocean always looked like it was folding on top of each other in a sea of scribbles coloured Pacific, Navy, and Midnight Blue.

If he squinted, Patton could see constellations in the sky. Dancing in the velvet blanket above him were stars, mapping out the image of a young boy helping someone off the ground after a nasty fall.

It was his perfect Thomas. Always selfless, always perfect.

On the nights when Roman would find him, sitting on top of a hill with his knees brought close to his chest, he would always let Patton lie down in his lap and weave him a fairytale; one that Thomas used to love. The prince would always save the day. The teacher would explain absolutely everything. The mind would never reel, and the heart was always right.

He couldn’t help but miss it. He missed the days when it seemed like royalty could be as honourable as the ones in Thomas’s old picture books; that learning was not as painful as it was now. And while the mind was buried through layers of heavy static and storm clouds, the heart didn’t know the way.

Thomas wasn’t as good as he wanted him to be, and Patton just didn’t know what to do.

But all of that didn’t really matter in the Imagination. The fact that it was bright and sunny only meant that Thomas was the same goofy, loving child he used to be. Sure, a few things slip past Roman every now and then (Patton would never ever ever forget what those goblins did to his new top-hat), but that didn’t mean that Thomas was inherently bad.

Besides, the day was just as beautiful as the night. With Thomas all grown up, he was creating things Patton could only dream of. Yes, storms would still roll around; but they would always give way to a beautiful rainbow.

The Imagination was always the same, no matter what crossed its path.

And perhaps, the same thing could be said about him.

Patton tried his best to get lost in the music Roman was playing for the group. He set aside his sandwich, and snuck glances at Virgil and Logan. They seemed at peace; Virgil was drinking tea he made for him, and Logan was reading a book.

And if Roman was singing, it meant that Patton still had it in him to bring his family together.

Patton sighed wistfully. He would do anything to capture this moment in any way he could. He wanted this single second to last forever. He yearned to keep the sunshine safe and sound in a small jar to put on his shelves.

Really, he just wanted everyone to be happy.

But as beautiful as nights in the Imagination were, Patton could learn to love the present if it felt this good.

#sanders sides #sanders sides fic #sanders sides fanfic #thomas sanders #virgil sanders #roman sanders #logan sanders #patton sanders #lamp/calm #hurt/comfort #gabbie writes things

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