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whatsk-poppinhomies · 8 months

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Pairing : Dad!Lee Felix x F!Reader TW : it's still pure angst ; Felix pining over reader ; biiig regret ; arguing ; Y/N has an idol boyfriend, but I'm gonna keep it a surprise, let me know in the comments how you feel ; Word Count : 4.7k Request : So many... It's here now! A/N : I kinda did a fast forward here because I feel like I do a lot of fics like this where the child(ren) are newborns and there's not much that I can do with all that. So, it's set about 2 and a half years after the first fic!

“You can finish editing tomorrow…” Your boyfriend said, coming up behind you as you sat in front of your laptop that felt like it was now burning holes through your eyes. “And the offer is still on the table, I can have one of the editors from the company take on the videos. I’m sure they wouldn’t mind.” He leaned over your chair, his chin resting on your shoulder as your head jerked forward, your lack of sleep catching up with you fast.

“We’re not even supposed to be together, I don’t think the company would really be okay with editing the vlogs… I’m fine, I just need another cup of coffee.” You excused, making sure to save the current editing file just in case you passed out and accidentally clicked something. “Are the babies still sleeping?” You asked as you pushed yourself up from the chair, about to head to the bedroom door, but his hands grabbed your hips, holding you in place.

“Yes they’re sleeping. And you don’t need another cup of coffee, you need to get to sleep too.” He gently led you to the bed, stifling his laughter as you staggered and tripped over your feet on the way over, only letting you go to pull the blankets back far enough for you to get under them. Once your head hit the pillow though your eyes were shut. “Goodnight, baby…”

“Who the fuck is that?!” Felix groaned as he watched the video on the tv screen, hoping that if the image were bigger he’d be able to figure it out, but you seemed to perfectly blur the guy in every shot and you didn’t even show his face. “Clearly it’s her boyfriend or something… He’s holding the kids and he’s in every single fucking video!”

He had only found out about your youtube channel and your twice a week vlog uploads because one of the guys had shown him, none of them had even known that you had been pregnant when the two of you broke up, but when they saw the babies, they immediately knew that they were Felixs kids. He became a regular viewer, and he had even created a fake account just to follow your channel so he’d be notified when you uploaded.

It was the only way he was able to see his kids, he was too ashamed to try to reach out to you, and you had done so well with working while you were pregnant and saving up money that you didn’t even ask him for help. Now that your Youtube channel had taken off, you were making more money and you seemed happy and that destroyed him.

“Dude… Why don’t you just call her up and ask her who it is? I mean, they’re your kids, you have the right to know who’s around them…” Hyunjin groaned, watching the video on the screen be rewound for the hundredth time so Felix could once again try to make out the mystery man just by his blurred back. “This is ridiculous… You’ve been watching her videos for a whole year… It’s giving stalker vibes.”

“Shut up, everyone watches her videos. You’re not calling them stalkers.” Felix mumbled, leaning forward until he was almost halfway off the couch and slowing down the video before pushing play again. “What if he’s an idol… What if he’s like… One of us, and she can’t show him because it’s against company rules. I haven’t heard anyone talk about her though… I know a lot of people… Fuck!”

“Yeah but people that watch aren’t acting like you.” Hyunjin retorted, rolling his eyes as Felix got on his knees in front of the tv now, his face practically against the screen. “For fucks sake, just fucking text her and ask. The worst she could do is tell you to fuck off… Which honestly wouldn’t be far fetched considering the way you were… But still.” Felix paused the video once more only to look at Hyunjin over his shoulder, his eyes narrowed at his hyung. “Don’t even… You’ve literally been watching your kids grow up through a screen. Just… fucking try to set something up so you can at least meet them. It’s kind of pathetic that you’re doing all this.”

Felixs eyes rolled as he turned back towards the screen, now focused on his son and daughter, both of them being held by the blurred man in each of his arms, their smiling, freckled faces looking at the camera that was directed towards them. He had missed so much, but in some way, the videos made him feel like he was still there, he was still a part of their lives in some way, even from a distance. It’s all he had. “What am I supposed to do? Run back to her house and try to apologize? I said awful things, Hyunjin… I can’t take those things back. Let me at least have this.”

Hyunjin sighed heavily, running his hands over his face before looking down at his phone. “It’s 2 in the morning, Felix. At least do this shit when you’ve had some sleep. Your eyes are barely even open.” And, knowing that Felix wouldn’t move unless someone else moved him, Hyunjin got up off the couch and yanked Felix up off the floor. “And think about what I said… It would be way better than doing this every single night.”

“You’re bringing them in today, right?” Your boyfriend asked as you sat between both of the kids' highchairs, taking turns making train sounds as you fed them their morning oatmeal. You eyed him curiously. You had never brought the babies into the office, you never felt the need to, plus, nobody knew about them, nobody even knew that you and your boyfriend had been together for an entire year now. Everything was kept under wraps to protect him and the children.

“And why would I do that?” You mused, your eyes still darting between the kids to make sure none of them were spitting up their breakfast. He simply shrugged, but you saw the glint in his eyes, he was up to something. “They’re not old enough to be trainees yet, and I don’t even know if I want them to live that kind of lifestyle. You see how hard it is.” You were being honest, but you also knew that that wasn’t what he was thinking of at all, and usually when you said something so off the wall ridiculous, he’d quickly correct you and tell you what he was really thinking, and that’s exactly what happened.

“I don’t want them to be idols either. I want them to be happy and not have to hide from cameras all the time. I want them to be able to date… When they’re old enough, and not have to worry about scandals and rumors. I want them to be able to live their lives normally.” He agreed, pulling out the chair next to your daughter and lifting her bib to wipe her chin. “I want the guys to meet them, I want management to meet them. If they say anything, I don’t really care. I love you three, and I’m tired of things being so secretive. I want to be shown in your vlogs. I’m tired of everyone assuming I’m Felix because the kids look like him.”

You snorted loudly, drawing the attention of the kids beside you who both tried to mimic the noise you had made. “I think that’s the craziest thing you’ve said all week.” You joked, but he was serious, and you could tell by the look he was giving you. “Babe, I love you, and I’d love to be able to show you in the videos… But do you know how much backlash you and the group would get? I can’t do that.” You explained, scraping the last bit of oatmeal out of their bowls and feeding it to them before cleaning them up and letting them out of their chairs to go play.

“What are you talking about? Fans love watching us with kids, they live for it. We could get so much footage of not only me with the babies, but the other guys too. The fans will go crazy in a good way!” He tried to reason, and you knew he wasn’t exactly wrong. That’s why BabyClouds channel had so many views and so many subscribers. People really did love watching their biases in domestic situations like that. “Plus, I already told the managers that I was bringing in a couple people today that I wanted them to meet, and they cleared their schedule a bit to meet you guys.”

You huffed loudly, running your hands over your face. “Do they know exactly who they’re meeting, or did you just say someone?” You asked, and he pursed his lips, averting his gaze. “You’re throwing me and the babies into the lions den… What the frick?” He chuckled lightly at your censored curse, he thought it was adorable. “It’s not funny. You said it yourself that you didn’t want them being followed by cameras, and if the world finds out that it’s you in my videos, they’ll never leave you, me, or the babies alone.”

He reached across the table, grabbing your hands and giving them a light squeeze. “You’re thinking too hard about all this. Just go get ready, I’ll watch them while you do, and then I’ll help you get them ready so we can go up there. Everything is gonna be fine. I wouldn’t do this if I didn’t think it would be okay.” He brought your knuckles up to his lips, pressing kisses along each of them before lowering them back down to the table.

“Felix is gonna find out…” You muttered, drumming your fingers on the table nervously. “I’m trying to protect your friendship. If he knew…” You trailed off. He didn’t care, he didn’t care about anything other than you and the kids. It was exactly what you wanted in a partner, and it was still shocking sometimes to see just how much he stepped up to fill that spot. “What if they get mad?”

He shook his head, getting out of his chair to stand beside you, slipping his finger under your chin and tilting your head up to look at him. “They won’t… And even if they do, you and the kids are worth more than being a star. This…” He looked around the house, the floor littered with toys, stains on the carpet from spilled bottles, scribbled out drawings that hung on the fridge like the most priceless paintings… “This is what matters, this is what I want.”

You blinked a few times, your vision blurring with unshed tears as you looked up at the man that you absolutely loved with your entire heart. “You’re amazing… you know that right? God, I love you.” He chuckled softly, leaning forward to press his lips to yours, his thumb gripping your chin lightly to keep you from pulling away too soon.

By the time your lips disconnected, you were breathless and slightly dizzy, not even wanting to open your eyes, but his voice brought you back down from cloud nine. “Go get ready, baby. I’ll watch the kids while you do.”

There was something big going on in the industry, so big in fact, that the heads of the companies themselves were said to have been talking about it. It was nothing solid though, at least, not that Felix or the rest of the guys have heard. In the grand scheme of things, when it comes to big news, groundbreaking information… the idols don’t hear much until it’s either about to come out, or when it’s already been released.

This case was no different, other than the fact that the people who did know were much more tight lipped about whatever it was that they knew. That didn’t stop tiny bits of information from coming through the cracks, making their way into Felixs ears in passing. A company war, was all Felix had heard though, and sadly, those words gave him more questions than answers.

At first, Felix thought it would be another Kingdom situation, but that didn’t make any sense to him after giving it a bit more thought. They hadn’t been told about something like that, and usually all the companies involved would be promoting it. None of that was going on, and whenever he caught wind of this apparent war between the companies, it seemed more serious than a tv show.

“BigHit Ent. Yeonjun finally reveals secret life… And it is Adorable!” It hadn’t been top news, but it was close enough that Felix didn’t have to scroll too far down his home page to see the headline. The picture that went along with the story was just a promotional photo of Yeonjun, so Felix was intrigued, wondering what it was that his friend was upto that he finally “revealed”. Felix could only assume that it was another pet, probably something like a Guinea pig or something, so he clicked the link, letting out a yawn as it loaded in.

The internet seemed to be going brutally slow, almost like it was done on purpose, but once the page had loaded in, Felix cursed himself for not taking time to mentally prepare for what it was that he saw. A screenshot image of the blurred out man from your vlogs had an arrow pointing directly to a selfie of Yeonjun, as if saying that he was the guy in your vlogs that Felix had been working so hard to identify.

That was impossible though… He and Yeonjun were close friends, and he was sure that Yeonjun would tell him something like that if it were the case, not exactly that he was dating you and parenting his children… But he would have at least heard something along the lines of him being in a relationship and being a father type figure… Right? It must have been clickbait, it had to be clickbait.

So he scrolled down, his heart already frozen in his chest before seeing anything. He didn’t know what he’d do if it wasn’t clickbait… Was there even anything that he could do? Taking a deep breath, he pushed play on the video that seemed to take forever to buffer. Of course, an ad came first, giving him time to breathe a bit more before the video actually started. It also gave him time to think more, panic more. Would it be an actual statement or just some video that looks like a fan edit?

When the ad ended, it was a black screen, and then it faded into Yeonjun, sitting in the room that he and the other guys usually did live streams in. Was he going to actually admit it? Was he going to say it himself? The managers actually agreed to this? “I’m sure everyone has seen the statement issued from the company, but I just wanted to come on here and say it myself.” He said, and Felix tried to remember if he had ever seen a statement at any point from BigHit. He was sure he hadn’t read anything, he would have texted him or called him if he had.

Yeonjun talked for a good bit, and Felix was barely even listening, still trying to rake his brain for any memory of a statement or any paparazzi pictures of you and Yeonjun together. There had been nothing. The two of you were either really good at hiding it, or the image at the top pointing to the blurred man in your vlogs was in fact clickbait and Yeonjun was with someone completely different. Felix would feel a lot better if that were the case. But then his eyes focused back on his screen when he saw movement just above the desk, as if someone was walking over.

“I guess he wanted to introduce himself first…” Yeonjun chuckled as he lifted the freckled tot onto his lap, gently grabbing his wrist and making him wave at the camera. There was no denying it, and even if he were to still attempt to say that wasn’t his son, you soon came into view as well, holding your daughter who looked identical to the boy, a spitting image of Felix himself, but the longer he looked, the more your features came into focus. The twins were a beautiful mixture of the both of you… breathing, living proof that at one point in time, the two of you loved each other.

You looked happy, and while that should make Felix happy, it did quite the opposite. How could Yeonjun, how could you do something like this to him? You knew that he and Yeonjun were close, you had been backstage for many shows and seen the interactions between the two of them. How was he supposed to continue being friends with the guy when he knew that Yeonjun was not only with you, but being a father to Felixs kids that he hadn’t even been able to meet.

“I’m so happy that the company allowed me to introduce them and show you this part of my life. These three are the most amazing people, and I’m honored that Y/N allowed me into her life. Now that everyone knows, it’ll make it so much easier for Y/N to post her vlogs, and you all can see what the four of us get up to in our daily lives.” Yeonjun explained, and Felix couldn’t handle it anymore. He couldn’t continue listening to his so-called friend talk about how he loved living out the life that should be Felixs.

He swiped off of the tab, his teeth gritted together as he stared at the ceiling. It felt like an attack, one so vicious that he couldn’t fully stomach the fact that it was coming from you. It was the breaking point though. He had gone long enough sitting back and trying to live vicariously through your vlogs, trying to put himself in the place of the blurred man in your videos. He was going to see you… But he had one thing to handle first.

///

“Tell the guys that me and the babies said hi.” You said from the couch, your head turned to look over your shoulder at Yeonjun as he stood behind you, his eyes bright and his smile wide as he looked between you and the children that he had come to call his own.

The two of you felt much more at ease now considering the fact that an entire week had gone by and nothing had happened, at least nothing that Yeonjun and yourself had truly been worried about. The fans were far more supportive than you both, and the company, thought they would be, and while there were a handful of weirdos that were now photoshopping their faces onto yours in your new vlogs, there were no actual threats. The biggest worry had been Felix though, and there’s been no word from him at all, so the two of you were just hoping that he either didn’t see it, or that it had been long enough since he had walked out that he realized it would be ridiculous for him to pretend to give a damn about what was going on now.

“I always do, babe.” Yeonjun murmured, leaning in to press a kiss to your lips, the small peck gradually growing deeper and more passionate as his hands moved from gripping the back of the couch to cupping your face and keeping you close to him. “I’ll be home before dinner. Don’t miss me too much.” He winked at you, causing you to roll your eyes before he stepped around the couch to crouch down on the floor, pressing kisses to the top of the twins heads. “Be good for momma, I’ll bring you home candy if you are.”

“Junie… No candy…” You whined, pushing yourself up off the couch to follow him to the door, grabbing his bag for practice and handing it to him with a pout. “They hate having their teeth brushed, and the more candy you give them, the higher their chances for cavities and I don’t want them to have to go through all that.” You explained, and Yeonjun sighed softly, leaning his forehead against yours, and through that you could feel him vibrating with silent laughter.

“Fine… No candy…” He relented, his hands gripping your hips. “I’ll get ice cream on the way home and I’ll brush their teeth before bed.” He squeezed your hips, turning your protest into a quiet squeal and he took the opportunity to quickly back out the front door.

As Yeonjun made his way down the hall to the practice room, he saw the other four guys standing awkwardly against the wall, their eyes trained on him as if they were expecting him, but there wasn’t a good feeling that came along with their looks, not at all. “What’s up?” Yeonjun asked, glancing around at all of them, their lips tightly drawn together as they all looked at the practice room door that was left cracked open, but not enough to see inside. “You’re not gonna tell me?” Yeonjun quizzed, and the guys all kept their mouths shut and their heads low as he finally walked by them with a shake of his head into the practice room.

“You know, I’m not one to fight.” The voice that was so obviously familiar came from the far corner of the room and Yeonjun quickly turned in that direction to see Felix standing against the wall, his arms crossed but his eyes boring into Yeonjun like lasers. “And I don’t really want to fight now… I just want to know why. Why her? Why my family?” Yeonjun knew this conversation was coming, he knew that he’d have to have this talk with Felix at some point… He just didn’t think it would be happening now.

“Felix…” Yeonjun whispered, trying to keep things calm, which was especially hard to do considering the daggers that Felix was giving him from across the room. “It’s not easy to explain… And I really don’t think either of us have the time for this kind of talk. Maybe we should wait a little bit to talk about this, when you’ve calmed down a bit.”

Felixs eyes widened and he took a small step forward. “I’m calm… I’m super calm. And I’ve got all the time in the world right now to hear your explanation. So just humor me… Lie to me… Tell me something because I need to know why the hell you thought I’d be okay with this.” There was no security team around, there was no one but those two in the room right now. No one thought things would get violent, and Yeonjun was hoping for the same… But it seemed like Felix wasn’t going to let things go, not right now.

“I never thought you’d be okay with it because honestly I didn’t think that you’d care.” Yeonjun spoke truthfully, running his hand through his hair. “I never intended on dating her out of respect for you… But when I heard about the way you left, the things that you said… I decided that I shouldn’t care about the emotions of someone who clearly never cared in the first place. I did what made me happy, and it makes her and the kids happy too.”

“You don’t know my emotions… You don’t know how I felt… How I’m feeling now.” Felix stammered, and Yeonjun sighed loudly as he rolled his eyes. “You saw us at the shows, you saw how much I love her, you know I do. I was stressed from a tour when that happened, I was jet lagged and I was exhausted when she told me. I didn’t mean anything that I said that day, and I relive it constantly… So don’t tell me that I didn’t care… I don’t want to hear that shit.” Felixs voice gradually grew louder as he spoke, and Yeonjun was quickly realizing that this was a bad idea, that he should have gotten someone to come in here with him as soon as he saw that it was Felix standing in the room waiting for him.

“You’ve been silent for two years. Don’t tell me that you regret saying those things now that you find out that someone else is in her life and fathering the children that you said you’d rather have had aborted.” Felix winced when his words were thrown back at him, but Yeonjun wouldn’t stop, not there. “You prioritized your career, and I’m not going to belittle you for that because that’s what most people in our position would do… But don’t come in here yelling at me and trying to pick a fight because I decided to prioritize the family that you kicked to the curb. I didn’t care about what could have happened when I came out about it because my family comes before this job.”

Felixs head lowered, shame evident in his body language. “I’m sorry…” He muttered, his cheeks hollowed as he sucked them in, trying to hold in his sniffles. “You care a lot… And they deserve that… And I can see that you’re… happy… Being with them.” It was hard for him to say these things, to speak the truth that he didn’t even want to believe in himself. “I still want to meet them though… the kids… I want to see them… If that’s okay…” He couldn’t bring his voice above a whisper, and Yeonjun slowly walked over to Felix and wrapped an arm around his shoulder to try to comfort him, because even though the situation in itself was awkward… He still sympathized with his friend, he still wanted to be there for him.

“And no one will stop you from seeing them. I know they’re yours, and Y/N knows that you have the right to see them as well. She just didn’t want to bother you while you were working, and she wasn’t going to take you to court. We talked about it a lot and we came to the conclusion that you’d either come around and ask to see them, or you’d just move on and pretend that it never happened. I’ll ask her which day is good and I’ll let you know, okay? She’s got a doctors appointment coming up though, so maybe next week would be better.” Yeonjun explained, trying to remember the schedule for this week off the top of his head, but Felix tilted his head to the side, concern filling his eyes as he looked up at Yeonjun, who simply laughed at his reaction. “She’s fine, don’t worry. I didn’t want to tell anyone… She didn’t want anyone to know yet… But we’re expecting…”

“Expecting what?” Felix quizzed, backing out from under Yeonjuns arm, his eyes narrowed now and his eyebrows furrowing. “Is she sick or something?” He pressed, and Yeonjun was momentarily confused before shaking his head, the smile on his face sign enough that whatever was going on wasn’t awful, at least not in the morbid sense.

“She’s pregnant…” Yeonjun stated, and he watched Felix go through many emotions in such a short amount of time, like rolling a dice, and instead of landing on the side where Felix would congratulate Yeonjun on the news, he was angry. “Felix!” Yeonjun called out the name when the boy stormed past him, throwing open the practice room door.

“Screw this! You get my kids and a kid of your own! And you’re gonna stand here and act like you actually care about the way I’m feeling! You’ve taken everything away from me!” Felix shouted, and the guys in the hall all stood just outside the door to watch, their jaws slack and their eyes wide as they listened.

“I didn’t take shit from you!” Yeonjun shouted back, throwing his hands in the air, in complete disbelief at the sudden turn. “You didn’t want this life, you turned your back on it, so don’t get pissed when someone else gladly steps in and lives it for you!”

Felix scoffed, his hand balled into a fist against the door that he was holding open. “You’ll never have what we had… I’ll always be the father of her first children… And I’m back… And I’m not turning my back on it anymore. I’m ready to live that life… So you better be ready for me to be there all the time.”

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aemondsbabe · 4 months

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Two Souls, Entwined

summary: dreams & dirty talk || helaena has been plagued with visions; things between her and her lady in waiting finally reach a boiling point

pairing: helaena targaryen x f!reader

warnings: mature/explicit, 18+ (minors dni!), no use of y/n, afab reader, wlw, mutual pining, angst but happy ending, dry humping, breast/nipple play, dirty talk but make it poetic and loving, slight aegon slander i broke my own heart, i love helaena sm, there needs to be more content for her i love her, let me know if i missed anything!!

word count: 4.1k

a/n: happy day ten of 12 days of smuff!! i'm actually very excited/proud of this one, it got a lot more personal than i was expecting! really feeding that scared bi girl i was in middle school idk. i hope y'all enjoy it!!!

12 days of smuff masterlist!

gif creds to @merrypembertons

likes, comments, & reblogs are very appreciated but never required!

🌟add yourself to my taglist to be notified when i post new fics!

Helaena sighs when she opens her eyes and blinks, disoriented by the early morning light, her head still clouded with sleep.

“Your friend is not a friend yet not your foe…” She whispers to the emptiness of her chambers, the cryptic phrase a familiar one now as it had been making its home in her head for the past few weeks.

Sitting up with a groan, she pauses at the edge of her bed, staring blankly ahead as the cloudy figures from her dream seem to swirl around her still. She was growing frustrated with the shadowy shapes, as much as she hated to admit it – she did not often enjoy her dreams, they often brought news of unpleasant tidings, secrets that she alone seemed expected to bear, but for the past few weeks her dreams had been… pleasant. Joyous, in fact. Yet they seemed much further away than the others, only revealing small slivers of information to her night after night.

She smiles softly as she gives one last glance out the window before padding over to the vanity in her chambers, determined to brush out her hair before the maids have the chance, they were always too rushed and hurried. Her mind drifts back to her dream as she runs a comb through her fair hair; lately, this mysterious dream seemed to be the only thing she could focus on for very long.

The figure in it seemed so familiar, moving around her as if it was an old friend, someone safe. She sighed again as she thought, blushing despite herself as she recalled her latest vision, remembering how the shadow had moved about her, as if in a courting dance, before it leaned in closely, though if it were for a kiss or to whisper a secret she didn’t know.

“Your friend is not a friend yet not your foe.” She repeats, as if the repeating will somehow reveal more.

It puzzles her greatly, the feelings of safety mixed with distinct romantic desire, a deep wanting from somewhere within her. There aren’t many people she even feels safe around, and even less so those she’d ever felt romantic longing for, and a much shorter list followed of people who had ever felt romantic longing for her. She feels secure around her mother, of course, and grandsire and her precious younger brothers, but she cannot help but wrinkle her nose with disgust at the thought of romantic intent with any of them.

She blinks, setting her hairbrush down and biting her lip as she thinks. I feel safe with Aegon, she ponders, brows knitting together, He’s never given me a reason to not feel safe but… She sighs, not bothering to finish the thought. She was well aware her marriage was one of politics, not of love. She remembers there had been whispers of many suitors when she’d finally come of age; everyone from Aegon and Aemond to her half-sister’s bastard sons had been considered, and though Helaena appreciated some more than others… she didn’t desire any of them.

Before she can help herself, her blue eyes flit over her own curves as she gazes at herself in the mirror, wishing, as she had so many times before, that she could reach out and feel her own reflection – feel a mirrored twin with similar soft skin and supple flesh. She wishes that soft, delicate fingers could touch her as well; she had grown tired of rough, battle worn touches long ago.

Someone I feel safe with and feel romantic longing for, she thinks again, blinking rapidly as a familiar face immediately springs to mind yet again, just as it had every time she’d pondered this mystery for the last few weeks, only growing more frustrated. It can’t be, she’d decided that long ago, long before this vision began.

But...

The Gods only ever seemed to show her visions that were assured, that would come to fruition, one way or another. Maybe… maybe that meant that y–

No, she thought, locking eyes with her reflection, Don’t be ridiculous.

She smiles as she hears her chamber doors opening, at the same time they do every morning, and turns around on the ornate, cushioned chair at her vanity, her eyes locking with your familiar ones as you waltz it.

“Good morning, Princess,” her heart beats a mite faster at the sound of your voice, at the bright smile that graces your lips as you stride to her, “I trust you slept well?”

“Good morning, sweet friend,” she greets you brightly, standing and pulling you into a hug as she did every day, “I did, quite peacefully, actually. And you?” She asked, trying to ignore the small voice that longed to hold you more closely, as she did everyday.

“I did as well,” your hand lingers in hers for a moment as she steps away, sitting back at her vanity as the maids arrive, instantly fluttering around the two of you like a kaleidoscope of butterflies, “After we break fast, would you like to come to the gardens with me?”

Helaena merely nods, though inside she buzzes, her heart fluttering like a bird’s wings.

I would follow you into the Seven Hells, she longs to say.

You wake with a small start, your hand instantly flying to your lips. You could swear they still tingle for a second from when she’d kissed you, just before you’d woken up. Blushing, you glance around your chambers, as if there would be anyone else there, and finding them empty leaves you both relieved and disappointed all at once.

Sighing, you slide off of your plush bed and walk over to your small vanity and use the small wash basin to splash water on your face. A small thrill shoots up your spine as you glance over your shoulder in the mirror, knowing from the position of the light filtering through your windows that it’s nearly time to go find your friend.

Friend.

It’s a funny word, you think, not one you would have imagined assigning to the princess all the many years ago when you’d arrived at King’s Landing, young and eager to be a lady in waiting for Helaena. You can’t help the smile that blooms on your lips each time you think of her, your quiet, captivating princess. You meet your own gaze in the mirror and frown, looking at yourself in the way a disappointed parent would look at a child.

Not yours, you chide, like repeating it over and over would make it hurt any less, Not yours, not yours, not yours.

Sighing yet again, you rise from your spot at the vanity and quickly grab your robes, eager to escape your own thoughts.

“This one is the iphiclides podalirius,” Helaena says, her voice soft as she marvels at the delicate butterfly perched on the back of her hand, “More commonly called the scarce swallowtail, I believe. It’s truly remarkable, normally they don’t travel this far north, though I’m told they’re a common sight in the gardens of Sunspear.”

“Then we are quite lucky to see it,” you smile, setting your embroidery hoop on the bench beside you as you study the yellow and black striped insect, though your eyes seem to drift to the princess on their own; you can’t help but smile as you see the way her beautiful sapphire eyes light up as she examines the small creature, “It’s very beautiful.”

Like you, you think, swallowing down the words.

“Would you like to hold her?” Helaena asks, looking at you hopefully.

As always, you nod, aware that you were the only one who seemed to entertain her fascination with insects and plants. Selfishly, you liked that.

Slowly and carefully, Helaena guides the butterfly onto the back of your hand; the two of you sitting close together, close enough for your shoulders to press together. A giggle leaves you at the feel of the insect's feet on your skin, so small and light, like tiny, faint kisses.

“Perhaps she was drawn to the hydrangeas,” the princess muses, “Those are new this year, though I suppose any of the other very colorful plants would spark her fancy as well, like the lilac or poppies or…”

It takes you a second to notice that she’s gone quiet next to you and you finally tear your gaze away from the butterfly, frowning slightly when you see the look on her face, her blue eyes hazy and unfocused as they flit back and forth like she’s watching figures you cannot see.

“Princess?” You ask softly, reaching out to take her hand, only halfway aware of the butterfly fluttering away, “Helaena?” You ask again, a bit louder, gripping her hand tighter.

“Your friend is not a friend yet not your foe…” She whispers, so faintly that the words scarcely leave her lips. Your frown only deepens, your eyebrows knitting together as you shake your head, trying to make sense of her words.

“What?” You ask softly, used to hearing her mutter odd phrases but seeing her in a trance was something altogether different, “Helaena? Should I go fetch the maester?” You don’t know why you ask her, not expecting a response.

The figure danced in front of her again, clouded in darkness, though instead of feeling cold and empty like the dark so often did to her, these shadows hugged Helaena like a blanket.

She blinked, and suddenly everything changed, becoming clear as if she’d blinked away tears. The clarity was startling for a second as the edges of the figure sharpened before her, still leaning toward her as if it meant to whisper an amorous secret.

Finally, her eyes focused and in that moment, she felt as if she could be knocked over by the air current made from the flittery wings of a butterfly.

You.

It was you, just as she’d always suspected, standing before her as if you’d always been there.

Your friend is not a friend yet not your foe. The phrase repeats in her mind like a mantra as she stares at you, marveling at the way you stare at her.

Like she’s precious, something to be fawned over. Something to be… loved?

Her heart hammers wildly in her chest as she reaches out, her fingers finally skimming over your cheek.

She could cry, perhaps she is crying, she doesn’t know. The only thing she’s sure of is that this feels so right, like a puzzle piece within her has finally shifted and slotted into place.

Just as it crosses her mind to lean in and kiss you, the vision falls away, words echoing in her mind as the gardens come back into focus.

Not a friend.

Yet...

Not a foe.

“Helaena, please!” You beg, urgency coating your voice as you lean in closer, closer than you’d ever dared before, praying to see some spark of recognition in the princess’s eyes.

Suddenly, she seems to come back to herself, gasping as you jump back away from her, startled.

“Oh!” She breathes, blinking a couple times before her blue eyes finally fix themselves on you, “I’m so sorry, I don’t… I don’t know what came over me.”

You shake your head quickly, moving back toward her and taking her hands in yours once more, your heart twisting as you notice them trembling slightly. “There’s no need to apologize, I’m just happy you’re alright.”

The two of you sit in silence for a moment, Helaena staring at you in a way that makes your cheeks heat up, as if she’s seeing you for the first time, before she seems to catch herself and look away, much to your disappointment.

“Was that one of your dreams?” You ask softly, looking down to where her hand rests within yours.

“Yes.” She says simply, her eyes locked on the way your fingers overlap hers as she desperately tries to ignore the voice in her head telling her to enterwine them.

“What did you see?” You ask, catching her gaze again. There’s a fire in her eyes now that makes you shiver.

She’s quiet for a moment, neither of you so much as breathing as you stare at each other – the princess looking at you so intently you wonder if she’s trying to hear your thoughts. You pray she can’t.

“Nothing of importance,” she says finally, pulling her hands away and standing from the bench suddenly, “They’re just shapes, really. Fuzzy things.”

“Alright,” you smile as you stand with her, picking up your embroidery hoop from where it had been abandoned at your side, “If you ever wish to discuss them, I would be more than happy to listen.” You tell her, desperately wanting to hold on to whatever moment you had just shared with her.

She merely nods with a small, soft smile and holds her arm out for you to take, “Let’s go, we don’t want to be late for supper.”

The fire warming your skin from the hearth in Helaena’s chambers normally felt cozy and inviting, but tonight the heat of it was stifling as the two of you sit in silence. Each of you is presumably working on an embroidery piece, although the atmosphere feels more like that of a stalemate with each passing moment.

You can feel her looking at you, sneaking glances every minute or so. You imagine she can probably feel the same, perhaps that’s why she keeps looking your way, because you can’t seem to keep your eyes off her either.

Finally, the tension in the room seems to boil over and you can’t take it anymore; your fingers dig into the wood of your embroidery hoop as you gather the courage to speak.

“Have I… Are you cross with me?”

“Pardon?” The princess asks, jumping a bit before laying her hoop at her side, her eyes wide as she looks at you unabashedly now.

“You, well, you keep looking at me. I just, I’m hoping I haven’t offended you in some way.” You chance a glance at Helaena and quickly do a double take, heart clenching in your chest when you see that she looks as if she’s about to cry.

“You haven’t,” she breathes, shaking her head emphatically, locks of pale hair cascading down her shoulders as she does, “I simply… I was considering the dreams I’ve been having, the one I had earlier today.”

“But what does that have to do with me?”

“You’ve been in them!” She says suddenly, loudly, like she has to force out the words.

“What?” You blink.

She sighs heavily and swallows, wringing her hands on her lap. “You were in them. You have been for weeks.”

You wonder if the princess can hear your heart beating rapidly in your chest as you blink, silently praying to whichever of the Gods may be listening that Helaena’s dreams and your dreams were not somehow intertwined. In the back of your mind, you knew your pleas were useless.

Your mouth opens and closes a few times like a fish that’s been plucked from the water before you finally find your voice, “What… what am I doing in them?” Your whole body buzzes, fearing the answer and desperately needing it all at once.

The princess hesitates, you want to scream as you can all but see her weighing her options in her mind before she finally, finally speaks.

“Courting me, kissing me.”

A small withering, wounded noise passes your lips at her words. You feel dizzy, the room spinning as you feel as though the entire world is crashing down around you while at the same time, it’s as if a mountain’s worth of weight has been lifted from your shoulders.

“And your visions… they only show things already fated to occur?” You feel frozen as you ask, not a muscle in your body moving. You know the answer even as the question leaves your lips, but you need to hear her say it.

Helaena sighs and shakes her head, a frown cutting across her pretty face, “That’s why it’s frustrating,” she bites, spitting the words like the mere act of explaining is painful, “This one cannot come to pass, I do not understand why I see it…”

She keeps speaking, talking through her annoyance, but the sound of your own blood pumping wildly through your veins blocks out her words.

No, your head pounds as you silently scream, No, no, no! Please, just let me explain, give me a chance, I’ll do any—

A loud sob cuts through your thoughts; the world seems to wrench its way back to you as you look at the princess, eyes widening when you see the tears flowing down her flushed cheeks.

“You could never truly wish to…” She says slowly, brokenly, words fading like she can’t even bear to say them.

“I do.” The words feel punched from your chest like you’re holding your heart out to the open air.

Helaena’s ocean eyes cut to yours as her breath hitches, the both of you not daring to move a muscle as you sit together on the small sofa in her chambers; the fire crackling in the hearth is the only indication that time has not ceased to exist.

You aren’t sure who moves first, maybe the Gods have threaded the two of you together so tightly that you move as one, you can’t be sure.

But her lips are on yours.

And her hands cup your cheeks as yours scramble to fit around her waist, four hands poised on a knife’s edge.

You sigh against each other, pulled together like a knot in a thread, and you gasp as you find yourselves pressed together, chest to chest.

Finally, you part for air, panting together as you stare, foreheads pressed together.

“Princess—“

“You love me?” She asks, swiping a thumb over your cheek; it’s only then you realize you’re crying.

“Yes,” you breathe, your hands grip her tighter, pulling her impossibly closer to you, “And you?”

“Yes,” she echos, her thighs slotting over one of yours as she climbs atop your lap, “You are my heart beating out of my body.”

Her words zap through you and your heart twists in your chest as your hands clamber against her, your lips press against hers again urgently. Twin moans, muffled into each other's mouths, sound between you as your hands cup her rear, pressing her more urgently against you.

“You are beautiful,” you sigh, hands grabbing at her plush curves through the silk fabric of her skirts, “You’re so soft and —“

“Warm,” she breathes, moaning into the column of your neck as her lips move against your skin, “You’re so warm, my love, like the sun.”

My love. The pet name sends a shiver down your spine as the two of you move together, pressing kisses against whatever patches of skin you can find, rocking together instinctually. The firmness of her thigh presses deliciously against your center, your skirts rucked up enough to bare your smallclothes, which press welty against your core.

You gasp, pressing a kiss to the princess’s collarbone as her hips move tantalizingly on your thigh, the warmth between her legs nearly suffocating as you whimper and sign against each other’s soft skin.

“I have always loved you,” you confess, nearly coming undone as she begins tugging at the ties at the bosom of your gown, her hands shaking as she pulls them loose, “Always, from the first moment I saw you.”

She makes a noise between a moan and sob as she finally tugs your bodice loose, and you whimper as her lithe fingers ghost over your breasts, causing your back to arch into her touch. “I’ve always loved you too,” she sighs as her soft hands cup your chest, kneading the flesh in her palms, “I always wanted to court you, marry you, I,” her voice breaks off in a faint, high-pitched whine as you finally manage to unbutton the bodice of her gown, she savors the feel of your lips and hands against her breasts for a moment more before continuing, “Gods, I wished to bed you, I’ve always longed to know what you would feel like, how sweet you’d taste.”

Her confessions nearly make you weep as you kiss over the fat of her breasts, keening into her supple skin as she delicately pinches at your nipples, “I have only ever thought of you, my sweet princess,” your chest heaves as you speak, your words muffled as you lick over her nipple, “When I sleep, when I wake, when I–” The words stick in your throat as you freeze, peering up at her through your lashes, somehow still impossibly afraid of going too far, or too fast, or too anything.

“When you what?” She asks, her voice so soft and sweet as she stares down at you, her fingers digging into your breast and side as her sapphire eyes flit between yours, “Tell me, my love, when you what?” She urges, her hips moving somehow more desperately against yours, only serving to fuel the fire slowly building within you.

“Gods, when I touch myself,” you whisper, shuddering as she lets out a breathy moan above you, “When I peak, sweet princess, I think only of you.” Your confession ends in a sharp gasp as she angles you backwards, anchoring you to her with an arm wrapped tightly around your waist. Her lips trail down your neck and collarbone before finally, she presses firm, fiery kisses to your breast, panting as she wraps her petal pink lips around your nipple and sucks, pressing her thigh more firmly against your center as she does.

“I think only of you too,” she breathes, blue eyes fluttering up to yours as your hands tangle in her pale locks, “Every time I touch myself, I dream of you,” she mumbles around your breast, her touch all but burning into you as she kisses across your chest before mouthing at the other side, “When my brother beds me, it is you I see, my precious lady.”

You practically sob as her admission sends you reeling, each cell in your body bursting like lightning from a stormcloud as you peak. You’re useless to do much else other than tremble in her hold as shivers travel in currents down your spine, your smallclothes no doubt ruined as your center clenches frantically at nothing, your pearl so taut and achy as it twitches against the princess’s thigh.

You don’t waste a second when your high subsides, moving frantically as you push Helaena back, slotting yourself perfectly atop her, pressing your thigh between her legs like it’s the last thing you’ll ever do. Your skirts fan out around your bodies, blanketing your forms in a soft sea of silk, your bare chests pressed tightly together as you rut against her, needing to see her awash with pleasure more than you need breath in your lungs.

“My love, my sweet princess,” you sigh into her mouth, your tongues swirling together as she all but cries beneath you, her hands digging possessively into your waist, “I am yours, my love, until the end of my days.” You swear, pressing your thigh tightly against her center, and your heart soars as she finally shatters in your grasp.

You watch, enraptured, as she peaks; mesmerized at the blush that blooms on her skin, at the way her blue eyes roll back as her eyes flutter closed, at how her breasts heave as she sucks in desperate breaths. The sounds she makes seem to pierce into your soul, each whimper and moan and cry ripping away parts of you until your heart is stripped bare, beating only for her.

The two of you lay in a heady silence for many moments, the only sounds being your soft, panting breaths as you each come down and the ever-present crackle sounding from the hearth.

“Your friend is not a friend yet not your foe.” Helaena whispers, her voice raspy as she speaks.

“Pardon?” You ask, pulling back from her embrace just enough to meet her gaze.

“That phrase,” she explains, her eyes glimmering in the firelight as a smile steadily blossoms on her pink lips, “I kept hearing it, in my dreams about you.”

You stay silent, tracing soft circles on her soft skin, leaving room for her to continue.

“I wasn’t sure at first, but now I see.”

“Hm?”

You aren’t my friend, the Gods spoke truthfully,” she beams, radiating joy as she studies your face, “You’re my love.”

Her statement is simple, but it makes you smile all the same as you press a sweet kiss to her lips.

“Yes,” you nod, pulling back to meet her eyes as you lay a hand over her heart, “Always.”

tagged lovelies: @helloworldiamnotarobot @drakonflames @marysucks-blog @watercolorskyy @valeskafics @iamaegontargaryenwife0 @aemshaircare @1997babyyyy @lovellies @little-moonbeam-666 @blackswxnn @alerisc @fan-goddess @wickedfrsgrl @moonriseoverkyoto @echos-muses @schniiipsel @avidreader73 @marvelescvpe @imawhorecrux @grsveeth0m

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scoonsalicious · 7 days

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Unwanted: Chapter 30, Epilogue - Pt. 2

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Avenger!Fem!Reader

Summary: When your FWB relationship with your best friend Bucky Barnes turns into something more, you couldn’t be happier. That is, however, until a new Avenger sets her sights on your super soldier and he inadvertently breaks your heart. You take on a mission you might not be prepared for to put some distance between the two of you and open yourself up to past traumas. Too bad the only one who can help you heal is the one person you can no longer trust.

Warnings: (For this part only; see Story Masterlist for general Warnings) Language, mild sexy stuff (Just some very light hand business. Very light.)

Word Count: 1.1k

Previously On...: You moved out of the Tower :(

A/N: This is it! The last part! You guys. I can't even. It's been a magical journey, and I'm so honored that I got to take it with all of you. I'm scheduling this post on Thursday in my office, and I'm fucking crying, because you've made this more than anything I could have ever hoped for. I love each and every one of you, so fucking much. Thank you for coming on this adventure with me. Thank you for loving Pocket. Thank you for sticking with Bucky and not throwing knives at him and his stupidity. Just, fucking THANK YOU. You are all amazing, beautiful people, and I could not have done this without you. Thirty Chapters, One Hundred Fifty Five Thousand, Four Hundred and Fourteen Words, and more to come. Bucky and Pocket's journey is not over! POOKIE LOVES YOU SO MUCH.

NOTE! The tag list is a fickle bitch, so I'm not really going to be dealing with it anymore. If you want to be notified when new story parts drop, please follow @scoonsaliciousupdates

Banner By: The absolutely amazing @mrsbuckybarnes1917!

Thank you to all those who have been reading; if you like what you've read, likes, comments, and reblogs give me life, and I truly appreciate them, and you!

Taglist: (Sadly, tag list is closed; Tumblr will not let me add anyone new. If you want to be notified when I update, please Follow me for Notifications!) @jmeelee @cazellen @mrsbuckybarnes1917 @blackhawkfanatic @buckybarnessimpp @hayjat @capswife @itsteambarnes @marygoddessofmischief @sebastians-love @learisa @lethallyprotected @rabbitrabbit12321 @buckybarnesandmarvel @fanfictiongirl77 @calwitch @fantasyfootballchampion @selella @jackiehollanderr @wintercrows @sashaisready @missvelvetsstuff @angelbabyyy99 @keylimebeag @maybefoxysouls @vicmc624 @j23r23 @wintercrows @crist1216 @cjand10 @pattiemac1@les-sel @dottirose @winterslove1917 @harperkenobi @ivet4 @casey1-2007 @mrsevans90 @steeph-aniie @bean-bean2000 @beanbagbitch @peachiestevie @wintrsoldrluvr @shadowzena43

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Not even twenty minutes later– it was actually almost pathetic how close your new place was to the Tower, really– you were opening up the door of your brand new penthouse apartment. It was more extravagant than any other place you’d ever laid your head, and when Tony’s realtor had first shown it to you, you’d balked at the opulence of it. But Tony reminded you that you’d been shot, after all, and had almost died once, then actually died, all in the span of a few days, and after that, on top of everything else you had already endured in your life, wasn’t it time you treated yourself to something good? Besides, it wasn’t like you couldn’t afford it. So, here you were.

“Honey, I’m home,” you called out softly to the enormous, empty space. It would still be some time before the movers finished loading up and delivering everything from the Tower, and then you were going to have a lot of furniture shopping to do. Toeing off your shoes, you padded your way across the apartment to the terrace. Opening the glass doors, you stepped outside. You walked to the edge and rested your elbows against the railing. Taking a deep breath, you admired the view of the city before you, the Tower just a block away. Looking across, you could easily make out Tony and Pepper’s apartment. Waving at breakfast, indeed.

You felt a pair of strong arms slink around your midsection, tugging you into a broad, warm chest. “Thought I heard you come in,” Bucky said, nuzzling his head into the crook of your shoulder.

“Hey, baby,” you smiled, reaching back to caress his face with your hand. You turned in his arms so you were facing him. “I missed you.”

Bucky laughed as he pressed a gentle kiss to your lips. “I only left the Tower two hours ago,” he said. “But I missed you, too.”

You wrapped your arms around his neck and stood on your tiptoes to kiss him, pouring every ounce of love and affection you felt for him into the motion. “I can’t believe we finally did it,” you grinned.

“Took us long enough,” he mused back, but then turned thoughtful. “Probably would have happened a lot sooner if I hadn’t–”

You brought a finger to his lips, silencing him. “Stop. We agreed not to talk about that, remember? Dr. Whitmore said we can’t move forward if we keep hashing out the past, and I just want to move forward, with you.”

“Sorry,” he murmured, but you just smiled and kissed him again.

After you’d been released from the hospital, you and Bucky had had a long, emotional discussion about the future of your relationship. The only way you’d ever stand a real chance, you’d both decided, was if you committed to couples’ counseling and complete and total honesty. Bucky knew he didn’t deserve yet another chance from you, and you probably wouldn’t have given him one if you hadn’t loved him so fucking much. But you’d actually died, and you couldn’t stand the idea of wasting any more time without him. Now, after nearly a year of doing the work, both on your relationship and yourselves, you felt your connection was stronger than ever. And besides, when it really mattered, Bucky had proven, in the most definitive way, that he would pick you over Jade Carthage.

“So…,” you said once the kiss had been broken and you began playing with the hem of his shirt.

“So, what?” he asked. You raised an eyebrow at him suggestively. His eyes widened as he caught your meaning. “What? Here? Right now?!”

You tilted your head and looked up at him with the most innocent expression you could muster, given how completely un-innocent your current thoughts were. “Yeah, right here, right now. Don’t you think we’ve waited long enough, baby?” You trailed a hand down the center of his chest and his breath hitched. “Almost a full year, spent using my fingers, pretending they were you, never feeling full enough? Never getting off as good as I got off with you? It’s been so long since I felt you inside of me, Buck. So long, it fucking hurts.”

When you had decided to give your relationship a real reset, one of the rules you had established, with the advice of Dr. Whitmore, was no sex. You needed to establish emotional intimacy and boundaries once again, without the complications a sexual relationship would bring. She had even suggested you both try to date other people, to ensure that this was the relationship you both truly wanted, but neither one of you could bring yourselves to do it. And now, here you were, almost a full year since the last time you’d been together, and you were desperate.

Bucky groaned at your words and you knew he was this close to giving in to you.

“Come on, baby,” you purred, reaching down and slowly unbuckling his belt. “Don’t you want me? Don’t you want to be inside of me?” You slowly began nibbling at his jaw, tasting the salty sweetness of his skin and letting it flood your senses.

“Always want you, Pocket,” he growled, tightening his grip on your waist and pulling you flush against his hips. You let out a low moan when you felt the evidence of his arousal press into your stomach through his jeans.

“Then have me, Barnes,” you whispered, carding your hands through his hair. “Have me on this balcony, have me on every fucking surface of this apartment, as many times as you want.”

Any remaining sense of resolve Bucky may have possessed snapped, and he was on you, sucking on the skin of your neck as he rutted his hips against you, and it felt so. fucking. good. to feel him like that again. His hand dipped into the waistband of your pants, where he found you wet and eager for him. “Fuck, sweetheart,” he growled into your skin as his fingers slipped through your slick folds to toy with your clit. “All this for me?”

You groaned as you felt one finger gently breach your entrance. “Only you, love,” you moaned. “Only ever you.”

You both froze when you heard the sound of the elevator ding, and Bucky quickly withdrew his hand, popping his finger into his mouth to suck away the evidence of his actions. Grunting in frustration, you looked around him to see the elevator doors open and the movers begin to unload dollies of boxes from the Tower into your new apartment.

“Fuck,” you whispered. “So much for reunion sex. I swear, I’ve got blue balls, Barnes”

Bucky grinned at you, leaning down to give you a quick kiss before redoing his belt and heading over to help the movers. “This’ll only take a little while, doll,” he winked at you. “We’ve got the rest of our lives together to make up for lost time.”

<- Previous Part / The End

#bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes x you #bucky barnes x y/n #bucky x you #bucky x reader #bucky fanfic #bucky barnes #bucky barnes fanfic #bucky x female reader #bucky barnes fic #bucky barnes fanfiction #james bucky buchanan barnes #james buchanan barnes #mcu bucky barnes #james barnes

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scoonsaliciousupdates · 13 days

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Unwanted: Chapter 23, Undressed - Pt. 6

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Avenger!Fem!Reader

Warnings: (For this part only; see Story Masterlist for general Warnings) Language, mentions of alcohol consumption, mentions of sex, human trafficking.

Word Count: 455

Previously On...: You made a Bad Decision :(

A/N: You know what, I didn't realize how short these parts were! Let's get into Chapter 24 today, too, shall we?!

NOTE! The tag list is a fickle bitch, so I'm not really going to be dealing with it anymore. If you want to be notified when new story parts drop, please follow @scoonsaliciousupdates

Banner By: The absolutely amazing @mrsbuckybarnes1917!

Thank you to all those who have been reading; if you like what you've read, likes, comments, and reblogs give me life, and I truly appreciate them, and you!

Tumblr will not let me directly tag the following: @marcswife21 @erelierraceala @jupiter-107 @doublejeon @hiqhkey @unaxv @brookeleclerc

“And where the hell have you been?” Sam asked when you eventually walked back into the apartment. “I’ve been calling you for hours!”

“Out,” you said simply, putting your bag down on the side table.

Sam approached you, leaning in close to study your face. “Are you drunk?!” he asked.

“What are you, my mother?” you scoffed as you moved past him and into the kitchen. You were still drunk, so you needed to pour yourself a glass of water to mitigate the hangover you’d no doubt have in the morning.

“Pocket,” Sam followed you and leaned on the counter as you sat on one of the kitchen island stools, “we’re on assignment. You can’t go off for hours without telling me to get plastered!”

He was right, you knew that, but your pride, and the alcohol, wasn’t going to let you admit it. “Forgive me for taking a few hours off,” you snapped back at him. “Shaking my ass for intel is exhausting, and I deserved a break.”

“Don’t pretend this is because you wanted a ‘break,’” Sam said. “You freaked out because of Bucky and you ran off to spiral.” His voice softened. “But you can’t do that, Baby Girl. Not right now. Not when women are counting on us.”

Oof. That got you where it hurts. “Did you relay the info I gave you?” you asked him, hoping to avoid any further discussion of your transgressions. If he found out you’d also gone out for a fuck with a complete stranger, he’d be livid.

“Yeah,” Sam said, and you were grateful he seemed willing to let it go, as well. “They think it’s a promising lead, and they’re gonna have… some people look into it.”

Some people. Safe words for Barnes and Carthage, no doubt, given they had the most experience with Hydra.

“You did good, Baby Girl,” Sam added.

You nodded, suddenly exhausted. You stood from your stool and picked up your glass of water. “I’m gonna go to bed. Night, Sam.”

You were almost out of the room when Sam called your name. You turned to look at him. “I don’t know if I should be telling you this or not, but, you should know– he was yelling at her to leave him alone, says she won’t stop following him around the Tower. He keeps tryin’ to avoid her, doesn’t want her near him, but she keeps poppin’ up like a bad penny.”

You didn’t need to ask who he was talking about.

“You’re right,” you said, turning to walk away again, and feeling utterly drained. “You shouldn’t have told me. It’s too little, too late now, and he only has himself to blame for it. I’m tired of caring.”

<- Previous Part / Next Chapter ->

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mrsshabana · 6 months

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PLEASE QUEEN, I need answers, in your post talking about some wip's that you were thinking about, I saw "shark", I hope I'm not hallucinating, but please, can you tell me a little about it??🏃🏃🏃

Omg yes! I'm so happy you asked about this one! The shark au is something me and @lilliumteaandbeez came up with. We have a ton of lore we came up with together, though I don't have much written for it. I believe I wrote this in February, and it isn't much but I'll share what I have!

More about Sharktaro though, he is also a siren! So, for the people that have been asking me for a siren au, this is the start of it.*･♡

✧:･ﾟ→ My WIP's

𝑺𝒊𝒓𝒆𝒏!𝑮𝒚𝒖𝒕𝒂𝒓𝒐 𝒙 𝑹𝒆𝒂𝒅𝒆𝒓

Your motion sensored camera got activated last night.

That’s why you find yourself trudging through a light rain shower, stepping through heaps of wet sand and over slippery rocks.

The camera had been set up in an alcove seated on the beach. A small cave sits on the edge of the ocean, with a deep pool of water seated in the middle of it. But deeper into the cave, the water becomes more shallow, and there is a rocky ledge circling the edge of the water, perfect for you to set up your camera to observe the unusual alcove.

It was for research of course. As a marine biologist you are always searching for unique phenomena. With this particular experiment, you were hoping to catch seals using this alcove as a shelter when hiding from circling sharks. But instead you were notified in the middle of the night by a strange photo being captured.

You couldn’t quite make out what it was. It was blurry and dark. The creature looked long like a seal but it almost appeared as though it had sharp claws. Having no idea what it could be, you are filled with anxiety and curiosity as you arrive at the cave.

Sounds of distant thunder echo in the distance.

You turn the corner and step into the darkness. The approaching storm blocking any sunlight that may have illuminated your path.

Flickering on your flashlight, you point it towards the shallow end of the cave.

Before you lies a humanoid figure. Laying on its side, back facing towards you.

The bottom half of its body resembles a shark. A long blue-green tail littered with dark spots. The spots cover his entire body, even the upper half which resembles a human man. The creature has a large fin on its back and pointed ears. Its body looks emaciated, ribs moving with each shallow breath that he takes. And a mess of black and green hair sits atop his head.

The water surrounding his body is bloody, and his tail seems to have gotten tangled in a net.

“Oh my god…” you gasp under your breath. The small sound is enough to startle the creature, quickly turning around, staring right at you.

His eyes glow yellow, slit pupils dilate from the bright light. He opens his mouth to show rows of dagger sharp teeth.

A high pitched, rattling screech echos from his mouth. Hissing at you with every ounce of energy he has left, you know this is a warning. But you can’t stop yourself from walking closer to him, you want to help him. It’s in your nature to help and rehabilitate injured marine life, and a mythical merman is no exception.

As you get closer he starts to panic. Flailing his tail, showing his teeth, hissing loudly. He tries to get away but he is too tangled up. It doesn’t take long before more blood spills out of him, and he can’t muster enough energy to continue.

His eyes get heavy and his breathing becomes more shallow but his hissing persists as you stand a few feet in front of him.

“I-It’s ok,” you mutter, taking a few steps closer to him, “I’m going to try to help you.”

Throwing your backpack to the ground, you take a seat in front of him, rummaging through your bag to find any supplies that may be able to help this poor creature. You always make sure to come prepared, because out in the field accidents happen all of the time. So luckily you have an emergency medkit. It’s meant for humans but you are sure it will do the trick for the time being.

When you reach out to him he snaps at you, almost biting your arm.

“Hey! I’m trying to help you! I know you are scared, but I promise I won’t hurt you.”

You can see the hurt and fear in his eyes when he looks at you. He has no idea that you are trying to help him. But the blood spilling from his wounds is too much and he loses the ability to care. He knows that he will die soon, so he stops fighting you.

The largest wound is on his tail, near his hip. It’s a deep laceration of some kind.

Cutting part of the net, to give you enough room to tend to his wound. You decide that stopping the bleeding is more important, and you will work on untangling him afterwards.

There is no time to waste so you hurry and disinfect the area and prep your needle. With trembling hands you begin to suture the large wound, resulting in a low, painful whimper coming from him.

“I know it hurts, but I have to do this or you will bleed out,” you console him but don’t stop stitching him up.

The skin on his tail is thick and tough, taking a lot of effort to get the needle to go through. But after lots of struggling, you manage to get the wound sutured. Taking some gauze and holding it to the wound to soak up some of the blood.

Scanning over the rest of his body, he has lots of smaller lacerations. They look like claw marks. But you can’t think of any sea creature that would have claws like that…

Once the bleeding mostly stops on the larger wound, you go to care for the other wounds. Disinfecting, covering with bandages, and suturing a few that are particularly deep. You run out of gauze pretty quickly, as he has many wounds and the moisture of his skin combined with the humidity in the air quickly dampens them.

#gyutaro #gyutaro shabana #gyutaro x reader #gyutaro x y/n #siren au #replies

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skylarsblue · 1 year

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✦Slashers With A Strong S/O✦

✦Note; Gender Neutral Reader, fluff, no warnings! I added a few for my own enjoyment, hope you don't mind!

FOR SOME FUCKIN REASON THIS POST GLITCHED OUT HELLA HARD, SO I'M REPOSTING IT JUST IN CASE. IF YOU REQUESTED THIS I'M SORRY YOU DIDN'T GET NOTIFIED RIGHT AWAY. TUMBLR'S A BITCH

✦Michael: He/Him, Jason: He/Him, Billy: He/It, Bubba: He/They/She, Bo: He/Him, Vincent: They/He, Danny: He/They

❀Michael Myers❀

Oh, he has no idea how to feel. This is OG Myers, he's got a pretty average build. 5'10", 190-somethin' pounds. Though he has super-human strength, for some reason, there are certainly people bigger than him. He knows this...he doesn't have to like it though. He likes being this strong and imposing figure that makes hearts sink. The fact he likes you is amazing as it is, the fact he doesn't feel a little threatened by you is even more bewildering.

Do not try to pick him up for no reason/out of nowhere. Not in the beginning, at least. You don't want to push your luck. As strong as you may be, he's immortal, so he'll find a way to ensure you know your place. He doesn't like being overpowered.

That being said, there are certain scenarios where your strength comes in handy, and it's in these times he'll begrudgingly admit to himself that he likes it. For example, when he's wounded enough to actually affect his ability to walk. Don't tease him as you princess carry him, but he is silently appreciative, as embarrassing as it is.

Michael's just very aware when he's in a position that's vulnerable. He's never liked that feeling, so it'll take a long time for him to be comfortable with the knowledge that you're powerful enough to hoist him up without breaking a sweat. Give it some time though and he'll start to enjoy it. He'll never admit it though.

Don't expect him to koala you, ever. But at some point, he'll start to be okay with you carrying him up the stairs when he's hurt from a hunt, or moving him to the couch during those rare times he gets sick from his poor wound care.

All and all, he'll never admit to liking your strength, but eventually, he'll come to find it useful. Just don't push your luck. He'll still stab you if you forget his terrifying reputation.

❀Jason Voorhees❀

Well, if he likes you, he trusts you a whole lot. Jason's all or nothing when it comes to comfort/trust. This means, unlike Michael, he doesn't really have any worries or insecurities over your strength. He thinks it's rather impressive actually! Depending on your height, if you're like...under 5'8"? He's gonna be double impressed.

Living in the woods and being self-sustainable is hard work. It requires a lot of physical labor. Carrying lumber around, building things, carrying heavy metal to set up his traps, fixing up the cabins. Jason can do it with ease, but it can get pretty tiresome when that's all he does. Lugging around logs of firewood and dead bodies. A corpse doesn't pull its own weight, after all.

Having you around and willing to help is extremely helpful! He's too polite to go out of his way to ask for your help, but when you do it anyways, it makes his stomach feel all weird. What gives him the shock of his life...(afterlife?) is when you lift him up for the first time.

He lets out a surprised grunt and looks around like a freaked-out cat. Processing the fact his significant other hoisted his 6'5", 200+ pound ass right off the ground without any struggle. It makes him admittedly a bit flustered.

He'd prefer if you gave him a little warning before you do it, it kinda freaks him out when you lift him all of a sudden, but that doesn't mean he dislikes it. Quite the contrary! He won't ask for it but when you lift him up and hold him there, it makes him feel safe. It reminds him of being a kid, when his mother would carry him virtually everywhere. Bringing back those old memories before he lost her is an easy way to make Jason melt.

He'll constantly worry about being too heavy, and he'll weakly insist you stop lifting him. He doesn't want you hurting yourself! Of course, you know better, and it makes his heart happy that you insist on doing it anyway.

❀Billy Lenz❀

Billy's a bit iffy with touch. Sometimes he can't get enough, other times he shuts down completely at the lightest tap. But he trusts you which means you get a pass more often. It likes your touch! Your touch doesn't mean bad things!

Billy's not very heavy or big. It's rather slim, actually. Bit of a twig, really. About 5'6", not including the heels on his boots, and maybe around 125 pounds soaking wet. Picking him up really isn't that difficult, to be honest. Still! It'll make him light up when you hold him aloft like a cat. On an excitable day, it'll squirm and giggle relentlessly.

On days where he's really not lucid, but not hyperactive either, he likes to cling to you like a koala. It doesn't matter if he's in the way, he's stuck to you for a while. It's probably the best time to cuddle it in all honesty. He won't talk much, doesn't really move either, just settles against you. Letting you be the anchor in reality so he doesn't drift off into space. It prefers that dynamic much more than panic attacks.

He tries to pick you up once and he fails, absolutely. Billy's a climber and he can hoist his own body weight just fine, but it's a different scenario when lifting someone else. Though the experience definitely makes him like how strong you are a lot more than before. Now it's twice as impressive.

Sometimes he squirms around when you lift him up. Be cautious of his legs, especially if you got a pair of nuts. Those boots are pretty damn effective at crotch shots.

❀Bubba Sawyer❀

Oh, Bubs is so flustered so quick, bro. Bubba is a big, big baby. Just shy of 6'6" and over 300 lbs. No one can just lift him. They haven't been lifted up since they were a kid, and even then it was rare. He's always been heavier set and his eldest brother often insisted it was a pain to lift him.

Here you come though, buff as hell, raising her off the ground like she weighs nothing. It definitely makes them all giddy. Bubba will start squeaking and squealing, flapping his hands all excitedly. Please carry Bubba like a princess, they'll swoon so hard.

It's guaranteed he'll be really worried about your back though. He's been hyper-aware of his weight for a long time, it's an insecurity they've always dealt with. All of her brother's comments definitely make her worry that you'll hurt yourself trying to carry her.

As a result of this? Carry him more, it'll make him melt completely. Go ahead and shower him with compliments while you hold him off the ground. It's the easiest way to make Bubba fall for you even harder. If y'all weren't already married, you will be now, it's sealed.

Sometimes Chop-Top & Nubbins will bother you to do the same with them. Bubba will let out little noises of discontent, they like to be the only one you pick up and carry. It's special for them! Though they won't insist you say no to his brothers, he will feel all fuzzy if you insist it's a Bubba-Only Privilege.

No matter your size, weight, or height? She'll return the favor. Bubba's used to heavy lifting, he's a butcher farmhand! It's only fair he share the experience, plus, it feels nice to have you close to him all day. Worry not about her arms, she was built for this!

❀Danny -Jed Olsen- Johnson❀

Ghostface is all over that shit man. He's so into it. If you're a victim, it's annoying, because it makes his job harder. But you're not! Not anymore, anyway, so he gets to appreciate all that strength. The knowledge you could probably whoop his ass definitely gives him a feeling of warmth in his face...and groin.

Danny's athletic and fit, but he's not Pyramid-Head levels of buff by any means. 5'11", bout 190 somethin' pounds. They're strong enough to lift twice their body weight with minimal struggle, but it's not every day you come across someone who can carry you like it's nothing.

I imagine you probably did it first in order to prove a point. Danny likes to tease, they probably make a little comment about being stronger than you, only for you to pick him up like it was nothing. It definitely catches him off guard for a bit, which is hard to do! As soon as it processes though? He's back to flirting with a smug-ass grin. He's a little shit.

After that, they'll try to get you to do it again, usually by annoying you or insisting it was a fluke and that you're not as strong as you look. It's only because he's secretly too embarrassed to admit he just likes being held. Danny's a switch and you can fight me on that. He won't admit it but he likes being carried like a pretty princess sometimes, makes him feel all cute.

One day, he'll come home all exhausted and annoyed. A day when their job was stressful, probably his coworkers being bitches, the coffee machine wouldn't work. It's times like that when he wants to go batshit crazy. Drop the Jed persona and stab everyone in sight.

They won't say a word when they walk into whatever room you're in, storming up to you at great speed. He stops right in front of you and stares at you for a bit, then after a beat of silence, he opens his arms and makes the grabby hand motion. Tips of their ears are bright red. He'll hush you really dramatically if you make a comment, but he melts when you pick him up. Just kinda chills there until the annoyance of everyday life finally settles back down. This one instance turns into a habit, for sure.

❀Bo Sinclair❀

Did someone say FRAGILE MASCULINITY?! Yeah, Bo's gonna be real fuckin' huffy for a while. Like Michael, he doesn't like the idea of being vulnerable, nor does he like the idea of his significant other being stronger than him. He's been conditioned into a traditional headspace. He's the provider! He's the stronger one! That's the rule!

It'll take a long time before he's completely comfortable with the fact he finds how easily you lift heavy things attractive. Given that's essentially the complete opposite of his usual "type". Weak, submissive, someone easy to assert power over. He was raised in a circumstance where he was always weaker, so as a result, he tries to pursue the other role. Being the strong and imposing figure.

It'll probably be like two years before you can lift him up without Bo getting genuinely upset. Doing it before then will probably lead to a fight that he'll brood over for a few days.

Man still bitches when you do it though, he just won't insist on screaming at you for hours. The best case scenario to do this is probably when a visitor goes rogue and hurts him enough to where he needs help walking. Complaining the whole time, he'll let you carry him back to the couch, as long as you ensure his brothers don't see.

Like with Jason, if you're on the shorter side, it'll confuse him. Wondering where you keep all that strength in your little body. He'll get a bit competitive, but he won't inform you that you two are competing. It makes him frustratingly turned on when he sees you toss a body like it's nothing, or lift a giant truck tire without breaking a sweat. Bo will deny it up until he literally can't anymore. He'll spill it to you but if you make a single teasing comment, he's kickin' you in the shin and storming off.

Oh, and bonus? You have a secret advantage at tapping into that well-guarded sub-space portion of Bo's brain. Just be gentle cause he is EXTREMELY fragile, a lot more than he lets on.

❀Vincent Sinclair❀

Well, you probably started as a visitor, which means they have to kill you. So in that situation, he finds your strength extremely aggravating. It's very annoying. But! You're not a victim anymore and so now he has no trouble admitting they find it incredibly attractive.

Between both of his brothers, he ranks second in physical strength to Bo, but that doesn't mean he's weak at all. We all saw how easily he can cut off a fuckin' head with two knives. Or impale a skull with a broken pipe. They're extremely dangerous and strong. Now that being said, you being stronger than them makes them feel...well, it makes them feel something for sure.

Lifting Vincent up isn't that hard. He's not light necessarily, but he's not that heavy either. No, it's the fact you can carry him around that makes them all flustered. It's one thing to lift someone, but to continuously support their weight whilst walking around like it's nothing? It's something Vincent hyperfixates on every time you do it.

Vincent's very touch-starved. Like, extremely. Though it makes his face burn when you throw them over your shoulder, he melts all the same. He won't actively encourage it like Danny, but he will try to subtly hint when he wants to be picked up. Hoping you'll notice the signs and do it on your own to save them the embarrassment of actually asking.

If Bo isn't around, Vincent loves nothing more than to cling to you while you do household chores. Admittedly, he gets a little too into it if you switch his weight onto your hip and hold him up with one arm. As if they needed any more confirmation that you're buff as hell. You'll probably hear them squeak and quickly try to force down the embarrassment. He's never considered himself the submissive type, somewhere in the middle instead, but you DEFINITELY MAKE THEM QUESTION.

When doing maintenance on the House of Wax, sometimes you'll lift them on your shoulders so they don't have to break out the ladder. He'll struggle to lose himself in the art of wax with your hands holding his thighs steady. And Bo never lets him live it down if the man notices just how much Vincent likes you showing off how strong you are

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genericpuff · 3 months

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Real life transparency shit time. Tattooing has been rough lately. Between the ongoing economic crisis that makes it difficult for people to even have their basic needs met let alone get tattooed (we're apparently seeing a 10% increase in grocery costs... conveniently right as minimum wage was about to go up by 30 cents 😒) and the oversaturation of the tattooing market itself (so many scratchers who "taught themselves" how to tattoo because they heard it was "good money" are now ironically making it not good money by oversaturating the market, good for them /s) I'm struggling to see how I can make a consistent living again without having to go back into retail. Maybe that's way too big of an ask at this point but if I'm barely making a living now with my tattooing as it is then going into retail just means I'll be working more for less pay.

SO all that said, I'm totally gonna combat this problem by offering another luxury service that isn't a need at all LMAO I have a Toyhou.se page now! (thanks to an IRL artist pal who's currently in their famous era and is amazing at helping the rest of us get our shit together lol)

I'll be offering adoptables as well as possibly tattoo flash (meaning flash designs you can buy and take to an artist who's willing to do them) for people to purchase and use to their heart's delight <3 Note that I'll still be enforcing a soft rule of the "no LO stuff" over this page because I don't want to be profiting directly of Rekindled or LO's assets, however I'll still be offering character design sets with loads of colorful Rekindled-like designs, so you might just find something you like that scratches that itch! And then once you buy it, it's yours to use!

So yeah, if you have a Toyhouse, please consider subscribing to my page so you'll be notified of any designs that drop! You'll almost definitely catch me streaming the making of some of these designs as well <3 I have a lot brewing around in my head now that just needs to escape owo so I hope you all enjoy what's to come!

#toyhouse #toyhou.se #adoptables #original work #original art #art for sale #ama #ask me anything #anon ama #anon ask me anything #announcement post #self post #genericpuff #lore rekindled #please reblog #best way you can help out is to share around!!!

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dearmantis · 1 year

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Heart to Heart

Pairing: Aleksander Morozova/The Darkling x sick!Reader

Summary: Your weak heart has kept you up all night once more and Aleksander is forced to face the fact that the person he loves is still mortal.

Warnings: sick and insecure (and slightly self-sacrificing) reader, conversations about death, the rest is just fluff, I think

Word Count: 1.5k

Authors note: I'm still alive. I'm sorry for taking such a long break without explaining why. I didn't really go online at all for a month because some things came up at the end of december that didn't really leave me alone until very recently. I'll try my best to not repeat this and start working my way through my missed notifications soon.

I'm not a native English speaker, and this isn't really edited at all. The title is from Heart to Heart by Mac DeMarco

When Aleksander wakes in the morning the first thing he notices, before he even fully realizes that he is awake and has to get up, is that he is alone.

Your side of the bed is cold and he curses quietly, fully aware of what this means. He can feel his heart rate shoot up, adrenaline rushing through his body as his thoughts take the worst turn. Quickly standing up he gets dressed for the day, trying his hardest to calm his mind. You're alright. Someone would've notified him if something bad had happened while he was asleep. One of his guards would've woken him up.

He knows this like the back of his hand, yet he pauses as soon as his hand wraps around the cold metal knob of the door that leads into the living room of your shared quarters. His mind is trying to prepare him for the worst. Prepare him to find your dead body curled in on itself on the sofa in front of a cold fireplace, all alone.

He has always hated this habit of yours. This obsession with keeping his day as peaceful as possible, of never bothering him with anything, has led to you refusing to tell him when something is wrong. You've been sick for almost your whole life, your heart a bit weaker than it should be, and every time you have issues with it during the night you leave your shared bed to hide away in a different room to make sure you won't disturb his sleep.

Many times has he asked you to stop, to wake him up so he can help make you more comfortable or call a heartrender to help you in case something is seriously wrong, but you just won't listen. You're trying to protect him from the pain of seeing you suffer, he understands that, but it makes no sense to him. Why are you, a mortal little otkazat'sya, so obsessed with protecting him, an ancient being who most people would argue has lost his humanity centuries ago if they truly knew him as a person?

Most... except you. You have found out about his true nature, about the darkness sleeping in his chest in the place where his soul should sit, and decided that he was worth loving. You saw and embraced all of him, the beautiful and kind, but also the cruel and ugly.

You. A small, mortal otkazat'sya with a sick heart.

The closest thing to a soulmate he thinks he will ever get.

With a last deep breath he finally opens the door and lets his eyes glide through the room, and he can feel his heart jump when he finds you carefully sipping on a cup of tea while sitting in front of a warm, burning fire, gaze focused on the snow silently falling outside.

Your head turns when you hear the door open, eyes lighting up when you see your husband.

"Oh, I'm glad to see you're awake. I sorted your folder for the meeting with the king and his advisors today. I hope I didn't mess up one of your weird sorting system though. I know you have your own way of doing things, but I thought this could-"

Your voice cuts off as soon as he reaches you on the sofa, quickly kneeling down in front of you before pressing his head against your chest. He knows your heart is beating, but he has to hear it right now. Has to hear the soft, familiar rhythm to calm his own heart and reassure him that this is all real, that he isn't dreaming.

You don't continue speaking after the surprise of his sudden movement dies down, instead mowing your hands up to run softly over his head while he listens to your heart pump blood through your body.

It still speeds up when he's close. You're glad it does.

You sit like this for a while, your fingers carefully moving to comb through his thick, ink black hair and loosening any knots that may have formed while he slept alone.

"I told you to stop disappearing." You finally hear him whisper after a few quiet minutes, arms still wrapped tightly around your middle while his head stays pressed against your chest.

"I know, Sasha... but it just wouldn't stop. I wanted to stay with you, but the pain wouldn't go away. I couldn't breathe right because of my own fear, so I kept coughing and it was so loud. I didn't want to wake you in the night before your meeting. I promise, if I felt like things were going to end last night, I would've woken you up."

You can feel the way his arms clench around you. You know how much he hates thinking about your death, how helpless and weak the simple fact that you will die makes him feel.

"Stop talking about it. It won't happen."

"Sasha, please, I know you don't want to think about losing me, but we have to make plans for-"

"No. I've created the fold, milaya. I will not let you die. I won't let it happen, even if I have to break the laws of nature once more. I will not let you leave this world without me. I refuse to lose another person. I can't be alone again, can't lose you too. I will not watch as the universe takes another person from me and leaves me alone to pick up the pieces of my broken heart. Not again. I can't do it again. You can't ask me to. You can't."

"I don't care about the king and I don't care about my rest." He hisses before finally lifting his ear from your chest, dark eyes looking up at you. "And I'm starting to hate your heart for keeping you up at night, for hurting you like this."

A soft smile finds its way onto your lips as you map out every freckle on his skin, every small wrinkle and every pore on his eternally beautiful face.

He never says it out loud but it's clear that it frustrates him more than anything that he can't fight the thing that is harming you. There is no enemy to slay, to throat to slit, no king to overthrow. He can't rip your heart out of your body and give you a painless, happy life that way. All he can do is hope that the medicine prescribed to you by the best doctors he can pay for will help and that the corporalki order will keep an eye on you.

This is entirely out of his control, and it's probably the worst feeling in the world for him.

"Hey, this heart is filled to the brim with love for you, don't be mean." You chastise playfully, grinning when you see Aleksander roll his eyes before moving to sit next to you on the couch. Leaning your head against his shoulder, you breathe in his familiar smell and let it soothe your soul. He still smells a bit like the soap the servants use to clean your bedsheets, with an underlying sweetness that comforts you like nothing else ever could. He smells like home, like belonging.

"I need you to swear that you will get me no matter what is wrong. Even if it's just a weird feeling in your chest, you need to wake me or come to me, please. That's all I ask of you, my love. All I want. I can't do my job as your husband and make you feel better if I don't know that something is wrong."

You think about it for a few seconds, mind replaying every other time you've had this conversation with him. This time is different though. He's not mad or upset, there are no tears in his eyes, he isn't even shaking. He just sounds calm, with a hint of pain in his voice, as if an old wound is giving him issues again.

Slowly you nod, arms wrapping around him as you snuggle closer to him.

"I promise I'll wake you Aleksander. I swear it. No matter what it is. I will wake you up or go find you."

Looking up at him you see the way his eyes shine at your words before he leans down and presses a soft kiss on your lips, movements careful as if he thinks you might break if he kisses you too forcefully. The only thought you have is how much you don't want to lose this. How much you want to stay with your husband.

You've accepted that you will die early years ago. Born into a simple family, you had no chance to truly survive long. You've already made it further than you should've. But being with Aleksander has made you greedy, his own ambition leading you to play with your own what-if scenarios. He convinced you to start dreaming again.

And the only dream you have is one of a world where you will never have to leave him behind, even if that means breaking the laws of nature.

Taglist: @snowkestrel

#aleksander morozova x reader #general kirigan x reader #darkling x reader #the darkling x reader

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lets-try-some-writing · 5 months

Note

Patient 1: Pretender Optimus Prime. (Ft. Pretender Bumblebee) Author's note: Enjoy my dear friend! I hope you enjoy it <3

Orion stumbled out of the portal, looking back at it for a brief moment as it disappeared. Where was he now? He got up, dusted off some sand that got on him, and adjusted his medkit. No matter where he was, he would help whoever. Decepticon or otherwise. That’s what a good medical bot in training would do! No matter the circumstances, they always help others. His fuel storage growled at him, notifying him that he hasn’t eaten in a good bit. He got out a small energon cube and from his medkit, munching on it as he walked around the area. He wasn’t getting any large energon signals.. As if yet. By this point he was prepared for anything! Nothing would scare him, or so he hoped. He hasn’t encountered anything too terrifying yet.

He jumped in surprise when he spotted a yellow and black blur run past him, he calmed his nerves (or he attempted to) as he glanced in the direction where the thing ran off to.. “?” He sensed a presence behind him, and he yelped a bit as he turned to face the figure, “AH-” There was Bumblebee, or well this universe’s Bee, not expecting to see such a small bot here. He thought it was solely his and his sire’s territory. He wasn’t much of a threat.. His sire wouldn’t like it if he just attacked for no reason. He beeped at him, “Hello!.. I didn’t expect to see anyone here.” Orion Pax managed to recollect himself as he stood proudly, or tried to make himself less of a threat. He wasn’t that at all in hindsight, but he was blindly following his mentor’s advice, “Hello there.. Sorry, you scared me there for a second!” He said that he was taught to say, “I am an in-training medical officer, Orion Pax.” Bumblebee seemed hesitant, this bot could be anyone. He looked at Orion’s optics.. Oh. It was just a bot, still. He was on a bit of an edge.

“Bumblebee.”

Orion nodded, “Oh! You must be this universe’s bumblebee!” He noticed an injury on the pretender’s leg, a small-ish cut, but it could still get infected with ease due to the sandy environment. He was not aware that this wasn’t a normal bot, the different mouth certainly tipped him off, but he was still a bit oblivious. Even if he knew he would still help. He said quickly, “I can help with that, I’m licensed with taking care of cuts like that!” He knelt down and opened his medkit, “Just stay still and I can help you.” Bumblebee looked a bit skeptical ‘this universe’s bumblebee’? It’s clear that this autobot didn’t belong here.. But he was so nice. Still, his sire taught him well and he didn’t let his guard down fully. Orion spoke as he delicately took care of the pretender’s injury, patching up any visible fuel lines and using a spare piece of metal to cover it like a temporary bandage, “I need to talk to this universe’s Optimus. Knowing him, he’s probably hurting and needs my help!” Bumblebee stared at him, “Why?” Orion said with confidence, “I sorta been sent around the multiverse, I’ve met a bunch of primes before! Like one of them is a morally grey jester god who may have committed war crimes but he’s very nice. His optics are so pretty I wish I could show you a picture..” The pretender was more than a bit confused, ‘morally grey jester god’? He honestly didn’t want to know.

Orion continued, “I want to help them because I'm a medic, to give them a good checkup! That’s what we do. We help people. No matter what, no matter if they aren’t truly cybertronians, or done hideous things. Because we care!”

“Medic in training.”

“Besides that, we help everyone!” Orion got up from the floor, “You're all fixed, I suggest asking your ratchet to fix you up fully, as this is only a temporary fix.” ”Thank you..” Orion smiled, “Sorry, couldn’t let you keep walking or running like that!” “It’s fine… You care too much y'know..” Orion tilted his head in confusion, “‘care too much’? That’s sorta my job, being a medic is tedious and exhausting, but it’s worth it to see your patients smile!” Bumblebee patted him on the head, Orion accepted it happily and asked again, “now that I've helped you, can you help me find Optimus?”

“It’s the least I could do for you.. Medic.”

Well, it wasn’t that much of a search as heavy footsteps walked towards them. Bumblebee got excited naturally at the signature of his sire and chittered happily, “Sire!”

The older pretender was worried about his kin because he didn’t return from the hunting grounds on time. He assumed he forgot, which was fine but he just wanted to check in on his baby.

He froze when he saw Orion, and the two stared at each other a bit as Bumblebee hugged his leg. Optimus patted his larva on the head gently as Orion mentally prepared himself. “Hello there.. Sir.” The mouth was much more noticeable for Orion, and he couldn’t help but say, “Whoa.. you look like a cool insecticon with that mouth!” he caught himself, “Sorry if that sounded rude, I just thought it was cool.” Optimus’s expression softened as he gestured for Bee to run back home, which he did without much compilants. He knelt down to Orion’s level, and spoke. His voice was deep, yet elegant at the same time. "You are little more than a larva. You pose no threat. Larva should not be left unattended."

Orion was actually a bit startled at that response, but tried to keep his ground, “L-larva?” A stutter snuck out, but tried to stay ‘fearless’. "Well I'm a medic in training, not a ‘larva’ that you speak of sir. I've been sent around the multiverse to do medical checkups! Or that's what I like to say.. last check up I did was a optical exam on mr jester god he's very nice."

"A bit off-putting but he gave me a sticker for my medkit." He exclaimed, showing the pretender a sticker of a puppy that the horror god gave him. The older pretender nodded in acknowledgement, getting up. “Come along, you are stepping on hunting grounds. I don’t want harm to come to you.”He left out the fact that this was his and his son’s hunting grounds, but didn’t want to scare the already clearly frightened Orion, he wanted this new larva to be safe as he didn’t want for his son to think of Orion as a fuel source. Orion followed behind him as they walked, Orion said only a moment later, “Do you have time for a checkup? I need to do a medical exam, from the Optimuses I've meant you're probably hurting both on the inside and outside, I can’t do it inside I’m not a licensed therapist, but I am a licensed medic! I would love to help you..” “You never told me your designation, young one.”Orion sheepishly chuckled and answered the question, “My name is Orion Pax, I'm working under my universe’s Ratchet as his mentee!” Optimus had a small smile, “It’s very pretty. As for the checkup, I wouldn’t mind a brief examination. You are quite brave, why do you care so much about beings that shouldn’t be cared about anyways?”

That wording made Orion a bit upset, “Why does everyone say that?...” he sounded frustrated. “I do it because I care! I’m a medical officer, it’s my duty to care for people. No matter what!” “I admire your gall little one, but you shouldn’t be doing this. You're so small.. Too little.”Orion spoke up, and with determination he said, “I may be small but I still got bite! Don’t assume I'm weak. I can handle myself plenty.”

Optimus’s response was to chuckle, he found it charming. To see this invader from another universe who was clearly too sweet to be here, care so much about him and try to be so brave for his ‘patient’s’ sake. “There seems to be no way to stop you, well, I can’t argue with a cybertronian medic with such a strong sense of virtue.”

Orion nodded as they stepped into the military base, Orion looked around for a brief moment. Seeing Bumblebee talking to Ratchet quite excitedly, seemingly about how Orion patched him up.

Orion held his medkit as Optimus sat down on the examination table, Orion glanced at the clearly confused Ratchet. “Oh, you must be this universe’s Ratchet! Greetings, I am Orion Pax, a medic in training and your optimus agreed for me to give him a checkup! It’ll be quick, I promise.” He smiled, and Ratchet simply nodded, honestly unsure of what to do.

“Do not worry about him, old friend. Orion is here to ‘help me’, in his words..”Orion got out his tools, and also a little notepad as he flipped to a page that had questions to ask patients, he was in medic mode and very very serious, but this just made him look charming then not. “Alright, now these are the questions I'm supposed to ask. Any encounters with strange substances, synth-ed, dark energon, etc? Be honest with me.” “None.”“Any recent injuries on the battlefield? So I don’t accidentally touch those sensitive places while I'm patching you up.” “That.. Well, I have been struck in the back as of late. My spinel struts are a bit.. Misaligned at the bottom. My own medic has fixed it mostly but there’s still some soreness.”Orion wrote that down, “Noted, back soreness near pedic plate. Anything else?” “That’s all.”“Alright! That’s good, not much external work, but we’ll see in the checkup..” Ratchet chuckled, “You're so focused Orion.” Orion smiled proudly, “Of course! I can’t let my patients be injured by my own servos.”

The other medic nodded, seemingly impressed. This only made Orion more happy to help, if he got approval from this Ratchet, He must be doing something right! Right?

Orion got out one of his tools, “I’m going to look at your optics now, the last Optimus I treated had some optic problems so I want to get this out of the way first.” “So be it. I know that I'm in good servos.”Orion did the optic examination, he exclaimed, in a bit of awe. “Your optics are so different..” Optimus held his nonexistent breath, he didn’t want the young one to question it, but by this point it was inevitable… “So pretty!” “Pardon?”Orion gushed, “I’ve never seen optics like it, it’s so beautiful! Your creators must've been so gorgeous!” he caught himself again, “Apologies, I shouldn’t question it..”

Optimus’s expression softened once again, he knew that Orion was slowly figuring it out, but he did not expect that response. It was honestly.. Adorable. This little medic was the cutest thing he’s seen. Sure, he disagreed with him being a medic at his age, but he truly had good intentions. “Thank you..”Orion grinned, “No problem! Back to the check-up, I can’t get distracted!!” he got out a scanner tool, it was a miniature version of it, as Orion would probably fall under the weight of the bigger one. “This is to check for any parasites underneath your armor, it’s really noninvasive so you’ll only feel a slight tingling sensation!”

Optimus froze, ‘parasites’? Would his larva feeding on his fuellines technically count as parasites? Would they show underneath the scanner?.. He got a bit anxious at the thought. How would he explain to the youngling about them? Orion seemed to notice this anxiousness as he stood there without doing anything, just holding the scanner.

“Why are you waiting medic?”Orion’s expression softened, “I saw that you looked anxious, so I won’t use it until you're ready. It’s alright Mr Optimus, everyone feels a bit anxious from time-to-time!” Optimus couldn’t really believe how.. Both oblivious and not oblivious Orion was. It touched his spark that he cared so much about him, but it also concerned him. What would be Orion’s reaction?

“I give you my consent, thank you for checking in on me.”Orion nodded cheerfully and started up the scanner, started with the legs, and then chest.. And then the older pretender’s arms. Optimus held his nonexistent breath again. Orion’s expression at first was a clear shock.. But he looked closer and his expression was… happily surprised? “Why didn’t you tell me you had feeding bitlets!? Sure, ive never seen anything like it but there still babies!” Orion said in a panic, not sure what to do.. Optimus was just as shocked, he did not expect this either. Did.. Orion thought that he was anxious because he didn’t want the medic to see that he had ‘babies’? That he thought it was shameful?..

Well it seemed to be the case when Orion started to lightly scold him, “You should’ve told me these things! I should’ve done a fuel supply check first… You don’t have to be afraid of your medic when it concerns your kin!” “Aren’t they parasites?”“Parasites?! No no this doesn't look like parasites at all! I’ve heard of insecticons letting their young feed off of them. I don’t know if you are an insecticon, but you certainly have traits like one!” Orion exclaimed. Orion then said, finally connecting the dots.. “Your… not an insecticon are you?” “I am not, young one.”

Orion seemed annoyed now, “I might have treated you incorrectly then! Did I hurt you?!” his tone devolved into one of worry, and even guilt. Orion really thought he might have hurt the prime.

“No no.. I am perfectly fine. You have taken care of me wonderfully. It would be a matter of time before you figured it out..”Orion, with full confidence exclaimed, “lay it on me! I can handle it.” “I- are you sure?”“Certainly, as per my contract. I cannot say anything that might reveal information about my patients! So your secrets are safe with me.”

Ratchet nodded, “He is prepared enough. Tell him the truth.” Optimus sighed, and he explained. He explained what Bumblebee, himself and Ratchet were; Pretenders. He then explained his mission, and what they're doing there. He also explained the ‘hunting grounds’.

Orion nodded, writing it down on his notepad, “Species; Pretender.. Got it.” He seemed in awe once again, Optimus was confused. “I’m surprised you aren’t afraid.. Perhaps you were more resilient then I realized.”Orion nodded, “Why would I? Your species is so cool!! I love how it works, I respect your mission so much, and I hope your larva grows up big and strong ok? I know the circumstances may be tough, you're forced to be all mean when you usually aren’t and that is horrible! Nobody should be forced to be a part of a war when they don’t want to..” He held the prime’s hand, “But be strong!” The older pretender was once again touched. He didn’t expect the response, but it was very very welcome. He realized that Orion did understand, even if he was a bit oblivious to what he had done, he was grateful. “I am… Truly touched by your gratitude. Be strong as well Orion. I don’t want to imagine anything happening to you and your pure spark.”Orion took it to heart, “I promise I’ll be strong! For both of us!” (chuckle) “For the both of us.”

Once the checkup was complete, Orion proudly handed the prime, and Bumblebee a sticker. “And since you two got the Orion Treatment™, you get a sticker!” he also got out two energon treats giving one to Bumblebee, “Andd a energon treat!” He cut another energon treat in half, and gave Optimus the treat and the cut in half one, he explained, “The half one is for the babies! I don’t know how much fuel you consume daily, but I think it will help!” “Thank you, it’s truly saddening that you have to leave so soon..”Bumblebee nodded his helm, far too busy eating his treat to say anything. Orion sighed, “I wish I could stay longer too so I could hear more about how pretenders work, but my sire will get worried sick if I stay out longer! Have to make it home before dinner.” “Understood, but I don’t want you to return empty-handed for your efforts.”

The Pretender Prime got out a small necklace, one with a charm that had a lustrous blue glow. The charm was shaped like an oval, and had a marking in it. He placed it around Orion’s neck. Orion looked at it, “It’s so pretty.. Thank you!” “Thanks should be for you, that will keep you safe if you encounter any of my pretender brethren. It shows that you are kin.” Orion gasped in happy surprise, “So I'm like half pretender now?” Optimus patted him on the helm, “If you wish to pretend, sure.” Bumblebee finished his treat, and ran over to hug Orion, “Come back soon! I’ll show you around our hunting grounds next time!!” A portal opened, and once Orion made sure he had all of his supplies in his medkit, he waved goodbye to this universe to go back home to Nimbus Prime and his mentor. He couldn’t wait to tell them what happened, and he would cherish his gift dearly. And with that, this wraps Orion's first patient case. Who knows who he will care for next, it could be anything. But he will address them without fear, and with compassion. Because that’s what a medic would do, wouldn’t they?

THIS IS FUN AND ADORABLE THANK YOU FOR WRITING IT!!

#transformers #maccadam #transformers prime #optimus prime #ratchet #bumblebee #orion pax #pretender au #others writing #crossover #alternate universe #good soup this #what a fun concept

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sonialiao · 6 months

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Interested in backing? Be notified when the project launches

Want to see previous pins I've made? Previous Successful Kickstarter Pins | Etsy Shop

Hope everyone's been having a happy halloween! After several years (?!) I've returned with a brand new Kickstarter campaign modeled after the original Robins After Dark-- this time focused on Gotham Femme Fatales!

(Lol I know Kori and Rachel don't count but shhh they're Robbie's friends they're honorary Gothamites ahaha)

The campaign will run from 11/6 at 9pm eastern to 11/26 at 9pm eastern. The normal KS pricing for the girl pins are $15 each ($18 in-hand) while the normal KS pricing for mini pins are $10 each ($12 in-hand.) There are further discounts for people who pledge for the full set of pins! There will also be a few early bird tiers available, so if you're interested in catching those discounts at launch, mark your calendars 😊.

A list of this campaign's offerings:

2.25" tall gold-plated enamel pins featuring the Sirens, Birds of Prey, and a few Titans/Young-Justice girls! These will be double-posted to prevent spinning during wear and feature glitter and sandblast effects to give the pins a bit of pizz-azz!

1" - 1.25" tall gold-plated mini pins for those who want a more subtle nod to their fan-favorite groups. These are shaped like badges and go well on shirt collars, bags, etc. Sandblast details will give the pins a bit of a 3D look despite their simple shape.

A new 5 x 7 Matte Postcard design for those who prefer to collect prints! One of the stretch goals includes a free postcard for all backers who pledge for 3+ GG pins.

Robins-themed Washi Stamp Tape! Includes the two girl robins and a bonus mini-Dick Grayson to round out the sidekick lineup.

Early Access to my Bat Theme enamel pin set. These are limited edition pins currently in production and will be sold as a set of 2 once in-hand. I'm giving Kickstarter backers early access to these designs before their public sale. These are large pins (3.25" - 3.75") and are perfect for displaying in a shadow box or as the main piece on an ita bag.

Remember that this is a fan project for nerdy enamel pin collectors! All the illustrations in this campaign are unofficial, Sonia-interpreted renditions of girls that don't get enough official love.

If you're not familiar with kickstarter, it's a crowd-funding campaign that lets customers fund a project before it's made. So keep in mind all these pin designs are not actual items (yet)-- you're helping to fund their production! Estimated reward fulfillment date right now is March/April 2024. In return for your patience, kickstarter backers will receive the best quality pins at the earliest time. If certain stretch goals are met, backers may also receive freebies like postcards and mini pins!

Thank you everyone for reading this far. I know my activity across social media has been spotty due to how busy I've been (and that I still have a fancomic to finish ROFL) but I hope there's still interest in a project like this 🤞. I'll make another post once the project goes live! But this way you all can look at what's available ahead of time and decide if you'd like to grab those early bird spots or not 😊.

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tarysande · 9 months

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On Grief. And On Friendship. On Memory. And Love.

When my grandmother died, we didn't have a traditional funeral. We didn't wear black. We didn't sit around, solemn and silent. We told stories. We ate food she would have liked and drank Bailey's with cream. We got to do it together, of course, and we got to cry and hug and mourn and laugh and sing.

I'm sure all of us have heard some version of the phrase "online friendships aren't REAL friendships." I know I have. I've never understood it, either. For me, in all my neurodiverse glory, online friendships are often MORE REAL. Where else can you meet people and immediately jump into all the things you have in common? All the shared loves and hates and hyperfixations? Where else can you just bypass small-talk and, as Anne of Green Gables would say, find bosom friends so quickly? I've met so many online.

I honestly don't remember when I met Sara/@dearophelia. When I look through my tags, I know it's been at least seven years. I'm certain it's been longer because she definitely had username changes. And I am total shit at remembering username changes. More than once, I've told myself I should keep a spreadsheet. I'm pretty sure I've known her almost as long as I've been on tumblr, and that's more than a decade.

When Sara got sick, I finally used that tumblr function that notifies you whenever a blog updates. I wasn't around tumblr as regularly, but I didn't want to miss anything Sara might say. I hoped that one day I'd get the notification that everything was clear, she was in remission.

I didn't. Today, I got what will be the final notification from her blog--@vhenadahls sharing the information that Sara passed away. That there wouldn't be anymore updates. No more reblogs. No more snarky comments in the tags or gushing comments in the tags.

If this were a room and everyone who loved Sara, who enjoyed her fanfic (with or without knowing the woman behind it!), who has listened to her playlists, who played ME3 multiplayer with her, who was in any way touched by her in a way that brought their lives joy, it would be so full. We would all have stories to share. We'd all have memories to relive.

This room would be decorated with labradorite and pink and fat birbs and cats. There would be so much music--Taylor Swift and Halsey and Florence and the Machine and Hozier and so many many others. There would be a million fabulous selfies on the walls of Sara's huge smile and her vulnerability and her bravery. There would be gaming knickknacks and D&D dice and tarot decks and crystals and magic and books on every surface. All her faves would be represented. And it would still only brush the surface of how vibrant she was and how deeply and enthusiastically she loved what she loved.

If this were a room where we could also add all the characters she created, whose stories so many of us loved ... well, it would have to be awfully big. Sara wrote a lot of stories for a lot of fandoms.

And if this were a room where we and her characters were gathered, but we opened the doors for all the characters and stories that Sara helped inspire, helped grow, encouraged and enabled, well, I know a whole lot of my characters and stories would be here, too. I'm sure I decided to create Rose Trevelyan because of some conversation Sara and I had where I was imagining Rose Vakarian-Shepard grown up.

Sara, I'm really sorry I didn't get to finish the Vakarian-Shepard stories before you left. Most writers write for themselves, sure, but often they also write for specific readers. Sara was always one of mine, but I don't think she knew it. I lived for her gushing tag-comments. I loved when she was always so quick to jump in with prompts.

I'm honored that I was someone with whom Sara shared her original fic work. (She also once shared an absolutely horrifying scene with Garrus and Shepard's clones that she cut from Nora's story because it was just TOO AWFUL. In fact, she shared it with me BECAUSE IT WAS SO AWFUL and she knew I'd appreciate it.) In my heart of hearts, I wanted Sara to finish that original story and publish it. I wanted us to be part of each other's group of writer-friends (you know, you always see them thanking each other in their books). Hell, I wanted to have a small press at some point just SO I could publish Sara's stories. I believed in her THAT MUCH.

I love Sara's stories. I love her playlists. I love her blog, with its hodgepodge of interests and loves. I love her imagination and creativity and attention to detail. I love that I can still visit that mind by reading the bounty of work she left behind.

I mean, she made me wholeheartedly buy into a relationship between Shepard's mom and ZAEED.

Sara was one of the constants in my online life over the last decade. Even if we hadn't chatted for a while, I always knew we could pick up again like no time had passed (thanks, ADHD). As I write this, there's a little chat circle on the bottom right of my tumblr screen with her avatar in it and I can't bear the thought of hitting that X button and never seeing it pop up again.

Sara struggled and loved and fought and overcame and breathed and was brave. Not just in the past few years, when she was sick. As long as I knew her. And she didn't let anything stop her. She snarled in the face of it all and wrote stories so beautiful they broke my heart and then pieced it back together again in the same paragraph.

I miss her. I will always miss her. But I'm so happy I got to know her as long as I did. She'll live on in my memories, in my stories, in the characters she helped inspire. She'll live on every time I look at my favorite tarot deck--she was the first person I yelled at when I bought it--and when I see fat birbs and cute-maybe-evil cats. And if that's not REAL friendship, real love, I don't know what is.

#dearophelia #death tw #cancer tw #on memory #on grief #on mourning #long text post #tara talks personal stuff

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scoonsalicious · 9 days

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Unwanted: Chapter 27, Unhinged - Pt. 6

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Avenger!Fem!Reader

Warnings: (For this part only; see Story Masterlist for general Warnings) Language, snark, violence,

Word Count: 1.9k

Previously On...: Guess who was waiting for you at the Wiggle Room, Besties! D:

A/N: THE POCKET v CUNTHRAGE SHOWDOWN BEGINS

NOTE! The tag list is a fickle bitch, so I'm not really going to be dealing with it anymore. If you want to be notified when new story parts drop, please follow @scoonsaliciousupdates

Banner By: The absolutely amazing @mrsbuckybarnes1917!

Thank you to all those who have been reading; if you like what you've read, likes, comments, and reblogs give me life, and I truly appreciate them, and you!

Tumblr will not let me directly tag the following: @marcswife21 @erelierraceala @jupiter-107 @doublejeon @hiqhkey @unaxv @brookeleclerc

You came to slowly, taking in one thing at a time in order to make sense of your current predicament. First, your head was pounding. You were going to need to get that under control if you had any hope of keeping your wits about you.

Second, you were sitting upright, but you couldn’t move. A gentle pull of your wrists and ankles met with resistance, and you knew from the cold metal beneath and behind you that you were mostly likely tied to a metal chair.

Third, you were so cold, your teeth were practically chattering. Carthage hadn’t taken the time to change you out of your dancer’s outfit, and you weren’t wearing shoes, making escape a bit more of a challenge.

Fourth, the room you were in was artificially bright, with no windows, white walls, and no distinguishing features. It looked so much like the rooms you had seen in the Hydra security footage that you would have bet all the money in your swear jar that you were underground.

Fifth, you still wore your bangle. While you didn’t have the range of motion to press the beacon with your other hand, you could still maneuver to press it into the arm of the chair. You were going to have to be very subtle about it. You just needed to keep whoever was guarding you distracted long enough to engage it.

“Ah, you’re finally awake.” Jade’s voice drew your attention to where she sat on a chaise lounge in the corner of the room. It was so out of place in the otherwise bland space, you had no doubt she’d brought it in specifically to wait for you to wake up.

“It’s very rude to keep your hostess waiting, you know,” she simpered. “And here I was being so nice by not killing you outright.”

“It’s even more rude to kidnap people,” you murmured to yourself. You shook your head groggily, putting a bit more disorientation into it than you actually felt. Let her underestimate the current state of your mind. “I don’t understand, Jade,” you moaned, as though you were significantly uncomfortable. “What am I doing here?”

Jade laughed and leaned forward, propping her elbows onto her knees. “Come on, (Y/L/N). You and I both know you’re not stupid, so don’t insult my intelligence by pretending you have no idea.”

You raised an eyebrow, calculating the risk of your next words. “There’s plenty of ways I could insult your intelligence, Carthage,” you said. “You make it exceptionally easy.”

Her eyes narrowed as she stood up and stalked toward you. Bending down, she gripped your cheeks in her hand, squeezing your face uncomfortably. “There’s that mouth,” she murmured. “Can’t understand why Jamie likes it so much.” She violently jerked your head to the side. “Not that it matters. He’ll forget all about it once he hasn’t heard from it in a while.”

“So, your plan is to, what? Annoy me to death?” you asked, with far more confidence than you felt.

Jade laughed. “Oh, no, no, no, sweetie. I’m not going to kill you. That’d be too… easy.” She began walking around you in slow, deliberate circles. “No,” she said eventually, as she paused in front of you. “I’m going to sell you. As much as I hate to admit it, you are pretty, and you’ve managed to keep yourself tight in your old age.” Old age?! Pfft! You were just over a month into thirty-five. Fuck this girl!

“Granted, though,” she bent down and leaned in to whisper to you, conspiratorially, “you are very, very used goods. But I don’t see any need to let your future owner know you spent a chunk of your childhood as a disgusting whore, do you? Honestly, I’m amazed Jamie didn’t go sliding right out of you, with how loose your cunt must be by now.”

You felt yourself tug at your restraints, your anger raising. “You don’t know what you’re fucking talking about,” you seethed, knowing that losing your cool wasn’t going to do you any favors, but not really caring in the moment. “I know Bucky didn’t tell you that,” you spat. “He wouldn’t.”

Jade caressed the side of your face, the gesture almost loving in its gentleness. “Oh, no,” she purred. “Jamie didn’t have to tell me anything. I learned everything I needed to know by listening to you tell FRIDAY all about your sad little past. An AI for a therapist?” she scoffed. “That’s a bit pathetic, even for you, don’t you think? What’s the matter? Couldn’t get a real doctor interested enough in giving a shit about you?”

You felt your blood begin to boil at the sheer violation of your privacy. “How the fuck did you even get access to those records?” you spat. “I checked your logs; the only thing you ever accessed from the Tower’s system were Bucky’s open files.”

Jade gave you a look that was almost pitying. “Oh, Pocket,” she mocked. “I thought you were supposed to be smart. I knew you’d be checking my logs. But I’d bet you’d never thought to check your beloved boyfriend’s.”

“No,” you protested, shaking your head. “Bucky would never go into my personnel files and he certainly wouldn’t share any of it with you. He wouldn’t.”

“Well, no,” Jade admitted. “He wouldn’t. I mean, I love him more than anything, but that beautiful fool is so technologically illiterate. I mean, really. Did you know he just leaves his system password written on a fucking Post-It note on his desk? Just sitting there, where anyone who happens to venture into his room can see it. Why, if he’s not in there, anyone could just walk in and get access to his credentials. And if they were, I dunno, a trained Hydra operative, they could access all kinds of goodies with them!”

“You don’t love him,” you spat as you tried to subtly trigger your bangle. “They programmed you to be obsessed with him. A person doesn’t do the things you’ve done to someone they love.”

Jade reached forward and brushed a strand of hair behind your ear, causing you to flinch at her touch. “And I suppose a person who really loves you would think it was totally fine to call you a slut, a whore, and… what was the other one? A fucktoy!” She laughed and the sound turned your stomach. “I gotta tell you, Pocket, it was almost too easy to feed him the right words to trigger you. I just pulled them straight out of your sessions. The poor boy was so afraid of losing you, he was willing to eat up every single thing I spoon fed him.” She pulled back and sighed. “Almost a little too easy, actually,” she lamented. “He was so desperate, so unsure of himself already, he’d believe anything I’d say. I gotta tell you, though, you obviously weren’t loving him enough if he was always questioning whether or not he was good enough for you.”

You swallowed at that, wondering if there was any truth to it. Had you not loved him enough if he had been doubting himself so much, even after all that time? No. You shook your head. She found cracks in him and she filled them with air, expanding them wherever she could, weakening his foundation to her advantage.

“So, what?” you asked derisively, “you think the two of you are just going to ride off into the sunset together? Please. He’ll never pick you, Jade. Never.”

“It’s not even going to be a decision for him, honey,” she said, voice sickeningly sweet. “I’m going to take away the option. If you’re gone, he’ll have no choice but to get over you, to forget you. To finally stop being SO. FUCKING. OBSESSED. WITH. YOU.” She shouted the end of her sentence to drive home her point. “If you’re gone, and I’m the only one left to comfort him, to pick up the pieces, he’ll have no choice but to realize he loves me.”

You barked out a laugh. “You can’t be fucking serious,” you wheezed. “Honestly, you’re not that fucking delusional, right? He doesn’t want you. He never will.”

Jade was before you in two steps, slapping you hard across the face. “You don’t know that!” she shrieked. “You can’t know that! I am going to be the best thing that ever happened to him!”

You spat out a mouthful of blood from where your teeth had cut into your cheek when she hit you. “Sure thing, Don Quixote. You keep poking those windmills.”

“YOU DON’T KNOW!” She shouted.

“I know you’re a Hydra murderer,” you countered. “Bucky knows it, too. We’ve seen the footage of you, you know, in your little base, with all your little Bucky cutouts. How you drew hearts in lipstick around them before you went off to touch yourself. We fucking laughed at you. How absolutely fucking pathetic you are. We saw what you did to the other operatives. Do you honestly think Bucky’s going to want to be with someone who has so much blood on her hands? Please.”

Jade reached over and grabbed your wrist, squeezing, and though it hurt as if she were trying her damnedest to crush your bones, you nearly wept with joy when she accidentally pressed the button on your bangle that activated the distress signal. The relief that washed through you at the familiar warm vibration as the signal began to transmit was palpable.

“We’re the same,” Jade seethed. “Him and I, we were made for each other. He’s going to see that. I just need to get him to come home, back where he belongs, and he’ll remember.” She let go of you and began pacing the room. “He’ll remember how much he loved having blood on his hands, too.”

“The Winter Soldier’s gone, Carthage,” you called after her. “He’s gone, and he’s not coming back. And Bucky is never going to want you. He’s not a killer, and he sure as shit doesn’t want to be with one. The sooner you come to realize that, the better off you’re going to be.”

In a flash, Jade was snapping her forehead into your face, sending your head spinning with pain. You felt blood begin trickling down your nose, and wondered briefly if she’d broken it. “He wanted me enough to fuck me, Pocket,” she murmured maddeningly, reaching to grab her phone. “Or have you forgotten?”

She flipped through the screens before opening up a video, and you realized with a sickening sensation that it was a video of her and Bucky in the safehouse in Russia. “Does Bucky know you recorded him?” you asked, disgusted. “Or are you that much of a sick freak that you’d do it without his consent?”

Jade slapped you again, though it didn’t hurt as much this time. You must be going numb to the pain.

“You’re gonna watch it,” she said, putting the screen in front of your face. You tried to turn away, but she gripped your chin, forcing you to face the screen. “You’re gonna watch how much he wants me, how good I make him feel. And you’re gonna watch when I make him come inside of me.”

You wanted nothing more than to fight her, than to close your eyes and ignore what she was about to show you, but a sick part of yourself demanded that you look, to face this final act of Bucky’s betrayal of you, once and for all. Grinning, Jade pressed the play button on her phone and put the screen to your face, so close you could see nothing else.

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