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lovethatmakingcoffee · 10 months

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Manhua recommendations part 2! Straight version!

I was planning on becoming her loyal sword, +52 Chapters

Rating: 9/10

The main character in this is so hot! Just a sword wielding hottie who is a bit oblivious to others' advances but she is slowly forming a harem because of how badass she is. She is living her life as a mercenary, protecting her younger sister, but eventually finds out her true heritage! I'm not quite sure where the story is going from here, but I have a feeling that we are just in the middle of it, so more plot will transpire from here on out. But I love her, she's fun and cool and everyone loves her including myself. Also her guy version is.... kind of hot too😳. Mm, the bisexual in me.

Stepmother Marchen, +110 Chapters

Rating: 9/10

This is a dramatic but lovely story with AMAZING art. Lives her life, dies, get sent back in time to fix her past relationships. Every character is lovely and we get to see some interesting issues being discussed like domestic abuse, gambling addiction, and the-CHURCH. But my lady is doing amazing this time around and is just a total babe. Though I wouldn't call her a milf. And the reason it's not a ten out of ten is cause I'm weirded out why she is a mom in the first place. Like nothing happened between them, but why did she marry this old guy and have to raise his four kids when he died? She's like... fifteen 🤨. I haven't read it in a while, and this one's translation gets weird later on, but there are other copies that you can dip your toes into. It's a compelling and cool story, check it out!

Please Marry Me Again, Husband! +59 Chapters

Rating: 8/10

I-LOVE-THIS-STORY! So soft, so fluffy, so wholesome. Cardi is sexy and I want to eat him up. They are so in love with each other, it's bananas. And really it's just a second chance at love and romance, and it's so charming. The protagonist is so much more sure and confident in herself after she died, got sent back in time to make her life better with the man she married. So perfect.

It's Time to Change the Genre, +78 Chapters

Rating: 8/10

This shit is funny! Like the protag isn't the smartest transmigrated character, but she is fun and goofy and we love her for that. This story isn't a super typical transmigration story, cause there is the part that is kind of different than the rest tho I don't want to spoil it. But this is a fun story that makes me laugh. And her nephew is the cutest little butt head. Adorbs!

Please don't come to the Villainess's stationary store, +54 Chapters

Rating: 7/10

https://manhuascan.me/manga/please-dont-come-to-the-villainess-stationery-store

Transmigrated and decides to leave her stupid family and start a new business. Which happens to be a stationary store where she gives candy to little kids at a neighboring school! Very cute! Very fluffy and wholesome! Her ex fiance is a dick, like probably the worst man ever, and her sister is a crazy bitch. So let's take revenge on them for inconveniencing the protagonist! And she is so smart and one step ahead of everyone and is so pretty aghhnjvhblagggh! And she just has a cute team of side characters who are their to support her during her time of need and it's so sweet! Like candy! Ahhh! Plus Plus! Here love interest is sexy~ Check this one out! Tho I should note that the translation here gets wonky later on, so you might need to find a new place to read it after a while.

Here Comes the Silver Spoon! +80 Chapters

Rating: 8/10

This is a good story. It's not exactly how you expect it to go, but it's still very good. We got Adelaide over here, who is the richest, smartest, evilest babe alive and I love her for that. She is just morbidly evil and will sell you to satan for one potato chip. But like, in a hot way. So the story goes like, she is engaged but her sister steals her fiance, so Adelle's gotta find a new better husband in like a week so she won't lose the family fortune. Her sister, Noella is so fucked up (don't know why yet), love that for her. I just.... ahh! She is so fascinating and Adelle is so cool!

This is a transmigration story btw, so it is even more interesting that Adelaide has these preconceived notions of her sister which influence their relationship.

A wicked tale of Cinderella's Stepmom, +96 Chapters

Rating: 9/10

Mommy! Mommy! MOMMY! MILF! WE GOT A MILF OVER HERE! And oh boy, she isn't like dangerous sexy, but she is so mommy it's hot! So person gets sent into cinderella's wicked stepmom's body and just decides "These are my daughters now." And just adopts all of them and loves them. And these girls are just *flings hands around* GIRLS! Like yes, yes! No girls hating girls here. We are just loving cute girls who have sleepovers and stuff. And mommy here is just mother henning them so much, I cry. And her love interest is such a chad. He's in victorian wherever and in his late twenties and sees a widowed forty-something-year-old woman with three older daughters and is like, "I'm your husband and their dad now." Like way to go, my guy. A man of culture I see. A true milfhunter, u have my respect, my liege. Also.... Feminism? In my manhua? It's more likely then you think.

The Tyrant's Only Perfumer, +87.2 Chapters

Rating: 7/10

This one in the beginning is a 6/10 cause the art isn't the best, but it gets obviously polished over time, becoming a 7/10. Like you can just see the evolution of the artist's hand in this one. It's very impressive. But the story is pretty basic. Person dies and gets sent into a villainess's body, but it is endearing to me because they couldn't smell anything in their past life and in this life, they got a great nose and can make perfume! I'm like: I can't smell shit either! Let me live vicariously thru u! And also she starts a business, and I love it when these protagonists wanna make the money! I'm like, hell yeah! Be a successful entrepreneur! But yes, the art gets very pretty later on, the story and romance are pretty basic, but a fun little read. Nothing bad, but nothing astounding either.

There is no use hanging on, +119 Chapters

Rating: 9/10

https://manhuascan.me/manga/theres-no-use-hanging-on

Ok, this is an amazing revenge story. We get dies, but gets a second chance at life by going back in time. You know the gist. And this story might be very predictable, but it's a good predictable where it is executed very well. The art is a bit wonk sometimes but honestly, it's the story that hooks you in. And all the characters are so compelling, I love it! I can't wait for more!

It's not your baby! +48 Chapters

Rating 8/10

https://manhuascan.com/manga/its-not-your-baby

Found this one recently, it's very cute but also a story filled with longing and the aching feeling in your heart of someone else's absence. The babe here fucks her best friend, gets knocked up, decides she wants to keep the baby and not deal with any of the noble or royal drama that comes with it and decides to gtfo. She is a wise military leader who knows how to absolutely disappear off the radar and honestly, that is so cool of her. Feel bad for her love interest because he just wants to be with her and can't find her. It's a perfect story of angsty longing and also a cute lady who can't wait to have her baby. And ahhhhh it's adorable how excited she is. Love it.

But honestly, I totally get why she misunderstands him and his intentions, and also why she wouldn't want the world to know that she is pregnant. I think her reasonings make sense and I find it very intriguing.

Another Typical Fantasy Romance, +79 Chapters

Rating: 10/10

https://manhuascan.com/manga/another-typical-fantasy-romance

AND I SAVED THE BEST FOR LAST!!!! Against what the name suggests, this is clearly not your typical fantasy romance story! It is so much more!!! Firstly, the male love interest isn't your typical willowy bishonen man. No, this is Pell and I want to chomp on his big fat nipples. He is a bear of a man, covered in hair and scars and uuuggh, Littera u are so lucky, girl! He is like- a gentle giant with big insecurities, but can also deck any monster and oof!!! He is just a nice change of pace and I wanna eat him up. Also Littera is just meta-savvy and knows her way around things, and we get to watch their relationship grow from pretty cute to so communicative it's ridiculous! There is no miscommunication here! They talk about their feelings and just make everything perfect between each other. It's so gooey, and cute, and they are so sensible! I love them and can't wait until they have a million little babies! I recommend this one out of all others if not just for Pell alone!

#manhua #manhwa #manga #fantasy #romance #Another Typical Fantasy Romance #It's not your baby #There is no use hanging on #The Tyrant's Only Perfumer #A wicked tale of Cinderella's Stepmom #Here Comes the Silver Spoon #Please don't come to the Villainess's stationary store #Please Marry Me Again #Husband #It's Time to Change the Genre #Stepmother Marchen #I was planning on becoming her loyal sword

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theheightofdishonor · 1 year

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100 (103) reasons why Daichi is the best

1. his face

2. them thighs

3. most reliable captain 10/10 has never met a ball he can’t save

4. the chip on his shoulder

5. he's not just an underdog, he's the captain of underdogs, the biggest underdog of all.

6. kinda insane sometimes. Total volleyball freak. (My adored <3333)

7. you will never meet a more reliable man

8. deserves all the admiration in the world for handling a team as insane and wild as Karasuno

9. knows his team like the back of his hand

10. y'all remember that time he saved kagehina's failed freak quick because he knew that they'd go for it and also knew they'd mess it up?

11. there was a solid period of time where he was both coach and captain and handled the jobs marvelously

12. never falls to pressure,

13. treats his team to after-practice meat buns

14. ridiculously observant

15. seriously, this man immediately figured out that hinata had his eyes closed during the first freak quick.

16. terrifying enough to scare Noya who canonically has not felt fear since he was a child

17. can silence people with a look.

18. surprisingly snarky

19. officially acknowledged by kuroo as a crafty son of a bitch and kuroo would know

20. fr though, Karasuno would never have been the team it was without him, he's such a great goddamn leader and a brilliant captain

21. every single person on his team listens to this man

22. and he's always great at knowing how to deal with the different members on his team whether its goading Tsukishima at exactly the right time or knowing when to cheer Asahi up.

23. relentless, driven and never gives up.

24. the honest country boy vibes

25. has the obliviousness of an anime protagonist when it comes to romance.

26. can site facts about sea creatures off the top of his head and does it often enough that Asahi can provide context for what he's talking about

27.the ✨ soulful eyes ✨

28. we all know that under that cute face is a terrifying demon but man, what a face

29. is a brave warrior willing to sacrifice (lose a tooth) for his people

30. basically got kagehina together

31. well-rounded player

32. got SO hot post time skip

33. not afraid to look like a lunatic in public when he's yelling at his teammates

34. short king

35. his flawless jump float receives

36. that one time he yelled at Noya and co for coming to school on New Years like Daichi what were YOU doing at school during New Years? 👀👀

37. wore the vice principle's wig twice and did so flawlessly

38. the fancy foot moves on court

39. best pep talks

40. also great motivational speeches. Ikejeri literally remembered one of them for like 5 years

41. this man was Karasuno's ONLY floor defense for a hot minute there and still won against Seijoh. Seijoh.

42. that being said, he's not part of the defensive line, he's a spiker who also does defense and don't you dare forget it

43. the breadth of his gorgeous, gorgeous back

44. Was willing to kick out Kageyama and Hinata if they didn��t learn to get along. It’s not like Karasuno has a deep reserve of players, they certainly needed every player they can get and yet, he held firm.

45. when he saves almost all of inarizaki’s crazy serves like it’s nothing

46. also wrecked Oikawa's shit with that one save

47. literally died for his team

48. first year daichi w/ 🤝 middle school hinata and kageyama; being people who care more about vb than the rest of their team and doing their best to get better on their own

49. it takes a certain type of man to let Hinata on court despite his utter lack of basic skills

50. his bashful grin that's probably got people swooning left and right

51. just generally serving looks

52. his arms

53. “We’re gonna eat them alive”

54. that one time he mentally dragged Ukai to filth

55. quick on-court reflexes

56. the patience of a saint to deal with kuroo and bokuto’s antics

57. refuses to get intimidated, even by Ushijima

58. let ennoshita lead the team even though he could’ve gotten back on court

59. this moment right here

60. when he was ready to retire because he thought it’d be better for the team

61. “especially people who have to bike up a mountain”

62. that time he scored off of kita’s recieve

63. the entirety of ep 3x06.

64. tired dad in a teenage body

65. because his old teammate told him he “got bigger 😏” and daichi thought they were calling him fat

66. being the epitome of benevolence a la forgiving Tanaka for killing him

67. “talking too much is a sign of nervousness, ku-roo san”

68. all the daichi-kuroo handshakes and how he magically starts acting like the competitive teenager he is when he spots kuroo’s rooster hair

69. i take back what i said about being able to scare people with a look, he can do it with just his aura

70. delivers an immaculate immitation of Kageyama

71. so concerned and sweet to his underclassman

72. tried so hard to help Hinata's nerves.

73. *solemnly* “i was going to keep it quiet but....we’ll have bbq after the practice is over”

74. cheerfully leads his squad through dozens of penalties during camp

75. at times, very dignified

76. takes to acting like Tsukki's annoying uncle

77. when he went back to the gym and we saw his mosaic of memories and it made us all tear up

78. Always imparting words of wisdom ie “SHUT UP” and “you’re a wimp”.

79. he literally has nightmares about the principal’s wig 😭

80. Didn’t brutally decimate Kageyama for the “i can spike, serve, etc all by myself” line because if some snotty brat said that to me, i'd

81. He’s so intuitive in general. He’s seen Kageyama for maybe a couple minutes and then a half hour match and already knows exactly how to hit him where it hurts like when he threatened to take the setter position away if Kageyama and Hinata couldn’t win a match together.

82. His saves are a work of art sometimes

83. So beautiful

84. always willing to collaborate with and concede to his teammates whether it’s asking Kageyama’s opinion on how to handle Seijoh or letting Tsukki handle the timing of the blocks or staying back so Ennoshita can lead,

86. Like despite hq having tons of characters + themes about pride and ego, Daichi has almost none at all. He’s secure in himself and his skill level and doesn’t get insecure about his teammates/friends being more skilled or better than him.

87. never lets failures bring him down

88. on a similar note, he, like hinata, is always willing to try, always ready to keep going no matter what happens or what obstacles lie ahead

89. he’s the one that gave Noya the nickname of “Guardian Deity”

90. the first one to always acknowledge and appreciate everything Takeda’s done for the team

91. Despite the generally optimistic attitude, he’s still realistic.

92. Hilarious when he’s being blunt

93. Surprisingly ok with fudging the truth. Like when he tells Asahi that he’s the only one that hasn’t gotten over the Date Tech match which is blatantly untrue. ‘

94. got so worried about his dream that he physically came to the gym to make sure it wasn’t taken over by the basketball team 😭

95. Simps over Shimizu like she deserves

96. For someone who claims to be terrified all the time, he’s damn good at keeping it together

97. his little rooftop freak out before the Inarizaki match

98. gorgeous eyes

99. the haircut that just adds to the unassuming look hes got

100. Doing hundreds of penalties only made him incorporate penalties into Karasuno's normal training routine. Such a masochist.

101. Has the sweetest friendship with Suga and Asahi

102. might not be a monster but has his moments of monster-esque insanity nonetheless. Tell me this doesn't sound like something Hinata or Kageyama would say

103. noya compared his defense skills to yaku who's possibly the best libero in the entire damn series (!!!)

Basically he's just the best and I love him so much that I started with goal of writing 20 and ended up with 103

*edit: initially had 102 but number 103 i came across and couldn't not include it

#sawamura daichi #haikyuu!!#haikyu #daichi sawamura #hq!!#listen i started w/ 20 and then ended up w/ 60 so i thought i'd just do the round 100 and be done with it but by the time i organized it #i ended up with like 115-ish which i figured might be a tad long #even for me #so i whittled it down to my top 102 faves #and why yes this was in fact spitefuly spawned by that hq captain poll #real life got in the way so its a couple days late but #edit: i did eventually realize i somewhat repeated a couple but oh well

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lostmyremembrall · 2 years

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༒ 𝑻𝒉𝒆 𝑽𝒊𝒓𝒕𝒖𝒐𝒖𝒔 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝑻𝒉𝒆 𝑺𝒂𝒄𝒓𝒆𝒅 ༒

𝑪𝒉𝒂𝒑𝒕𝒆𝒓 𝟐: 𝑫𝒆𝒏 𝒐𝒇 𝑫𝒆𝒃𝒂𝒖𝒄𝒉𝒆𝒓𝒚

Dom! Tom Riddle x Fem! Reader Genre: Romance, smut, angst

Summary: Canopus Lestrange confronts Tom Riddle about approaching the reader, in the opium den that the Dark Lord had created specifically for the purest of the families. Tom Riddle had finally ruined the last of the purebloods, or perhaps they were rotten to begin with; I leave the judgement to you.

Warning: Tom just being a creep and a dick. Womanizer!Tom Photos aren't mine.

Nav to the Series ->{𝑷𝒊𝒄𝒌 𝑻𝒉𝒚 𝑨𝒏𝒕𝒊𝒅𝒐𝒕𝒆}

“Riddle,” Canopus Lestrange stumbled his way through the room, dodging Eridanus Rosier retching and heaving into a cauldron. It was especially challenging to navigate in this darkened room that concealed every imaginable earthly sin in its shadows. He passed by a table playing poker, stole a glance at Prewett’s cards, and signalled to Alphard Avery across the table: Two pair, to which he nodded his appreciation.

On his trajectory to find Riddle, Canopus’ eyes caught sight of Ramona Selwyn, his childhood friend and one of the best in the year, or at least, used to be. She was draped across the chaise-longue, her eyes glazed over as she stared at nothing in the air. Smoke poured out of her parted lips and tumbled down her arms and fingers to the floor. Heavy liquor and empty bottles of fire whiskey scattered every surface of the floor and the heavy grey smoke of hookah and cigars pooled at the bottom. The smoke swished with every student’s movement, creating an illusion of ghostly shadows that returned from their dead to have their one last smoke.

He coughed, waving away the heavy smoke that wafted around the entire room. Behind the heavy veil of smoke, he found Tom Riddle lounging on the couch. Christina Yaxley laid on the floor snuggling against Riddle’s thigh, while the Head Boy himself was preoccupied with burying himself into Olympia Carrow’s face.

Some role-model Head Boy you were, Canopus thought bitterly to himself.

“Come on, stop hogging all the girls, you son of a bitch,” agitated, Canopus lightly punched his shoulder. As much as he tried to hide, there was tension evident in his voice as he chuckled nervously.

It took that punch for Riddle to finally stop and roll his eyes towards Canopus, obviously vexed by the disturbance.

Canopus was just about to call him a Don Juan when there was a thunderous shout from behind him.

“Riddle!”

It was Atticus Black, standing firmly in front of the couch. His eyes were bloodshot, his rage powering his engine. He grabbed Yaxley and Carrow by their wrists and yanked them away from Riddle. The girls stumbled before they settled behind Black.

“You have some fucking nerve for a half-breed,” Black spat venom, fuming like an enormous black bull towering over the rather slender man.

The entire Room of the Requirement fell silent. Hushes and whispers spread. Only the radio, oblivious to the change in the atmosphere, continued to sing the latest hits from the Wizarding world.

The Head Boy seemed especially irritated, his mood sullen to the point of no return. Against the bulky man, he was completely unfazed. His cool eyes glared up at Atticus as he lazily wiped his lips with the back of his hand, still wet from the kissing. Without ever taking his eyes off of Atticus, he slowly reached into his inner pocket for his silver cigarette dispenser. Two intricate, intertwining snakes were carved into its surface, its ruby eyes glinting in the dark dangerously. Riddle pulled out a cigarette and lit its end. He inhaled a single long smoke, and leaned back into the couch, squaring eyes with Atticus. There was something in his eyes that dared Atticus to continue.

The room was deadly silent except for the heavy breathing of Atticus Black. The smoke exited Riddle’s mouth and rose in the air, momentarily obscuring him behind clouds of smoke. Atticus Black scowled as the smoke, whether intentionally or not, blew right into his face. Riddle’s dark eyes, scarily similar to the inanimate snakes, glinted behind the smoke.

“Was that all?” he asked in a dangerously low voice.

Canopus could only stare at the stand down between the two men as Riddle’s eyes morphed into the eyes of a sinister, unrelenting devil. It was the eyes of an unyielding, crazed man who would screw you over ten times and still come for your grave after you dropped dead.

Atticus Black, being wise for once, must have felt the same threat to the core of his existential being: a fight or flight response developed over millennia of evolution telling him that in front of Tom Riddle, he was not the predator.

He grunted a reluctant admittance of defeat and shot Riddle one final dirty look before disappearing behind the smoke.

It was Canopus who punctured the silent air akin to a sharp, tightly-strung wire ready to snap at any moment. “Now, I didn’t smuggle all this firewhiskey for a morose night. Drink!” he shouted over the music, which was not difficult to do over the silent crowd. With that, he took a swing from his shot glass and smashed it against the floor.

The crowd breathed life once again. Murmurs, shouts, and eventually laughter returned to the room. Everyone returned to whatever vices that they chose: drinking, smoking, gambling, fucking, shooting up.

Canopus sighed in relief at the return to normalcy. He snatched two more glasses of shots from the floating tray and approached Riddle.

Riddle was leaning over his knees, his eyes transfixed on a spot on the floor as his face remained twisted in that signature, cool, bubbling anger. More smoke rushed out of his nostrils.

It was Canopus stopping in front of Riddle that paused whatever dark thoughts he was entertaining himself with. His eyes flickered up with still the same vengeful brows. Canopus offered the glass as a solace. Riddle responded by dropping his cigarette into one, the cigarette extinguishing with a fizzle. He took the other glass for himself. Canopus felt his cheeks twitch but concealed it quickly before he sat next to the Dark Lord himself, the true mastermind of these nights of debauchery unbeknownst to every greenblood that attended.

Riddle threw his head back as he drained the glass. His eyes glinted as they scanned over the crowd.

“You were right,” Canopus chirped, hoping to brighten up the mood. The Dark Lord never said no to those three words.

He continued, “You give them the most sinful vices, and all of a sudden they become mindless sheep.” He sighed, his eyes scanning his classmates, many of them his childhood friends. “I would say you’ve succeeded in corrupting the very soul of greenbloods.”

“Ha,“ Riddle barked cooly, the smile returning to his eyes at last. “You all were rotten to begin with.”

“All I had to do was provide the space,” he gestured to the wide empty space, the empty glass still in his right hand, as if to imply his benevolence.

“You don’t give yourself enough credit,” Canopus mulled, trying to ignore the insult maimed at the greenbloods. “You know our families care a great deal about being virtuous and —.”

He groaned and rolled his eyes. “Don’t bore me with your bullshit, Lestrange,” Riddle interrupted as he grabbed another bottle, this time a simple beer, from the air. “I know you greenbloods.”

It was these moments that wounded Canopus’ ego the most. When Riddle did not even have the decency to look him in the eyes while slandering the upper class. Canopus wasn’t worthy of Riddle’s full attention, even while being insulted, and that drove him insane. Riddle was fully aware of it.

Riddle smirked into his glass bitterly and mumbled, “Purity and sacred blood my ass,” before he took another swing.

“Abraxas and (y/l/n) care though,” he added quietly. “They never join.”

It was true. Even as he searched the crowds of many familiar faces, he couldn’t find the face of his best friend. The most devoted follower, to Riddle. Well, his most spineless follower, Canopus corrected himself, a fact Riddle liked to take advantage of. Every member of the Knights of Walpurgis knew that.

“Astute observation, Lestrange,” Riddle raised his empty glass to Canopus, his dull eyes never leaving the crowd. “Five points to Slytherin.”

Canopus was certain he heard a faint ding from the empty Great Hall as the points were added to the hourglass. Clearly, Riddle was insistent on observing his Head Boy ‘duties’, even as he continued to break a few dozen of the rules. He latched onto the title and power like a toddler just given a toy.

“Speaking of whom,” Canopus decided to change the topic, “I’ve been seeing you approaching (y/l/n) more often.”

“Aha,” a smug grin finally replaced his scowl, the first sign of genuine contentment that night. Canopus never liked that wretched grin.

He fixed his dishevelled tie as he said too pompously, “I have been courting Ms. (y/l/n).” A proud smile of an honourable gentleman was plastered on his face. But soon enough, his expression morphed into something sinister within a blink of an eye.

“I intend to fuck the brains out of her,” he said most casually, causing Canopus to choke on his drink.

Canopus’ cough turned into a fit of laughter. “Y/N? Good luck with that,” he managed to say between his heaving breath, wiping away a tear. “You know she’s too uptight to allow that.”

He noticed the deathly glare emanating from Riddle through narrowed slits of his eyes, but he couldn’t care less. Riddle may have made it into the greenblood society, may have climbed up the social ladder to have every man under his thumb and every woman under his spell.

But the Dark Lord could not, and will never, paint the entirety of greenblood society black. One man couldn’t get everything he demanded, not even the Dark Lord. Society, and tradition, were simply bigger than him.

“To allow some dirty half-breed to touch her?” Riddle’s icy voice was enough to finally subdue Canopus’ laughter, now reminded of the many ways Tom Riddle could make his life very difficult. But Canopus knew, every man and woman in this room would side with him at the end of the day, however much booze or cigars Riddle offered on a silver platter.

“Let me make this very clear, Riddle,” Canopus’ voice dropped. It was the least he could do to not embarrass him in front of everyone. “You’re charismatic, charming, terrifying. You’ve managed to woo and sleep with possibly every upper class woman. I’ll give you that. But there is just a line that one cannot cross.”

“The Greenbloods have had this tradition of not mating with anyone outside of its community. It’s bigger than all of us,” Canopus pleaded Riddle to see reason. “The society–a proper society of respectable history–just doesn’t work like that.”

“And you realise (y/n) (y/l/n) is the most strict out of all of us when it comes to following the greenblood rules.” Canopus sighed, placing a comforting hand on Riddle’s shoulder. “I just cannot, on my good conscience, let you go off embarrassing yourself like that.”

Tom Riddle hummed; he seemed to listen to his advice and consider them carefully. He crossed his hands into prayer and held them against his lips, being somewhat more reasonable and calmer than Canopus initially expected.

A couple of sixth-years giggled and staggered past in front of them. Canopus watched absent-mindedly as one tripped and briefly disappeared into the clouds of smoke. Soon enough, a hand emerged from within it, reaching for the other’s help. The boy cackled and pulled the other up, and the two disappeared once again into the crowd with laughter.

“You know what I see in front of me, Lestrange?” a calm voice of Riddle brought Lestrange’s eyes back to him. His eyes were still trained on the crowd, a look reminiscent of a godfather that birthed every single one in the room. Canopus did not answer.

“A fucking disappointment,” Tom breathed out.

He didn’t even seem angry. He, a man of dirty blood, was genuinely disappointed by them. “When I was still naive, all I wanted was to join you greenbloods, to be as sacred and pure as you all. To be invited to greenblood events like these. You all felt so out of reach, like some beings that lived above clouds.” The corner of Riddle’s lips twisted reminiscing their first few years together. Canopus remembered those days; Riddle, a creepy kid that used to stand in the corner to just watch and listen.

“But now that I’m the one hosting them, I see the truth.” you mean Malfoy’s hosting them, Lestrange corrected him. The Malfoy’s dwindling fortune had a reason behind it, which Abraxas liked to instead call “an investment in their future.”

“You’re all so overrated," Riddle's monotonous voice hinted at his utter boredom. "You’re just inbreeding parasites of the society who fancy themselves the only ones who own culture.”

“Riddle, you’re crossing a–,” but Canopus’ attempt at a warning was silenced too quickly.

“Honestly at this point,” Riddle slightly raised his voice and made a point of sliding his eyes to meet Canopus, a sadistic smile at play. “You should be begging for some fresh blood.”

Canopus heaved an exaggerated sigh. He was so done. So done with their cause being led by a half-breed. So done with anything to do with Tom fucking Riddle.

“Howl all you want, mutt,” Canopus hissed. But Riddle did not even seem to mind that he had just lost a follower. “We all know Y/N isn’t going to bat a single eyelash at you.”

“She already has, actually,” Riddle replied matter of factly, taking another swing from his beer. “Let’s just say… she’s come begging for help with her first night.”

Riddle leaned over towards Canopus, who recoiled from both the terror and the smell of liquor. Riddle did not even take notice as he whispered excitedly, “From her most trusted confidant.”

All blood drained from Canopus’ demeanour. The glass slipped and fell, shattering into pieces against the floor. This time, it was no celebratory occasion.

If it weren’t for the dread in Canopus’ eyes, anyone passing by would have mistaken Riddle for finally reaching the point of wooing a man.

“I am going to tarnish the very last thing that’s pure and virtuous about you dying breeds.” Riddle seemed to enjoy the terror and panic that started to take root in the depth of Canopus’ eyes.

Canopus knew then; he knew the demise of the noble greenbloods was not only inevitable, but already here. The end had begun the moment Tom Marvolo Riddle arrived at Hogwarts. Riddle’s eyes, on the other hand, widened with the sparks of fireworks in them.

His voice dripped sweet nectar, “And I am going to enjoy Every. Second. Of it.”

“And Abraxas…” Canopus whispered, expecting the worst.

Riddle’s twist of the lips confirmed everything, finishing his thoughts: “gave me his blessing.”

“That fucker,” Canopus muttered under his breath. And Riddle, with a victorious smile, watched him run off into the crowd before casting him one last despising glare.

The oldest Lestrange then disappeared, looking to have a word with the heir to supposedly the oldest wizarding family, who so easily gave up the throne to a nobody with a single nod.

A/N: Sorry for the lack of smut in this chapter. I ended up writing the smut first but decided that I wanted to show the other side of his motivations other than just lust. And I really wanted to show how much of a dick Tom really is. The chapter ended up being 4k, so I decided to split them into two. The next one coming very soon as soon I finish editing. 𝑯𝒊𝒔𝒕𝒐𝒓𝒊𝒄𝒂𝒍 𝑪𝒐𝒏𝒕𝒆𝒙𝒕 As Tom Riddle and his classmates approach their graduation, WWII is coming to an end. This effectively signifies the end of the British Empire and aristocracy as communism is on the rise across the globe. I think Tom would have had a fascinating insight as someone who is the only heir to the most powerful and historically significant pureblood family. But his muggle blood (he's essentially a bastard) also allows him to observe the turmoil of the purebloods from the outsider's perspective. He lived in what I think is one of the most fascinating time period, watching the end of the golden age of pureblood supremacy. The purebloods, literally, are a dying breed. Before WWII in Germany, there was an apocalyptic sentiment as it neared the fall of the Weimar Republic. They were in so much debt, causing crazy inflation where burning paper cash was cheaper than buying fuel for the fire. And what did everyone do anticipating the end? Those who had the money for it partied like crazy. Morality went out of the window and there was a big push towards scandalous art, dance, etc. That's what I think would have been happening with the purebloods in WWII period as well. At least, I would try to drink my sorrows away and live in denial if I sensed my whole world of traditions, culture, and properties was coming to an end.

#tom riddle x reader #tom riddle x you #tom riddle fanfiction #tom riddle au #tom riddle #tom riddle smut #tom riddle fic #tmr #tom marvolo riddle #tom riddle x y/n #tom riddle imagine #harry potter #dom tom riddle #dom!tom riddle #tom riddle series #tom riddle x fem!reader #harry potter fanfiction

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blueskittlesart · 2 years

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i know you love tamaki but thoughts on each of the other hosts? my favourite is mori <3

full disclosure tamaki was my first real conscious fictional crush at the ripe age of 11 and TO THIS DAY i have to pause the show during the piano scenes to recover my dignity so he will always be my number one. my everything. my absolute love interest of all time. i could write essays on him for real. i HAVE written essays on him. that being said i can absolutely talk about the other hosts bc im literally obsessed w this show

haruhi was the gender blueprint. truly. girlboy swag. she and misa amane death note were definitely like. the two most influential characters on my personal style in middle and high school. this doesn't say anything good about me. she is also multifaceted and well characterized in a way that's SO refreshing for a romance protagonist. character of all time. also btw im the exact demographic this show was written for meaning i was a tamaki/haruhi truther from the very beginning. where is the tall blonde prince boy to my short stupid gnc bitch. when is it my turn to be happy

hikaru and kaoru. yes i know the twincest thing is weird but i am CHOOSING TO IGNORE IT because 1. the show is making fun of shoujo tropes. its SATIRE GUYS and 2. they are literally so well characterized that it MAKES SENSE THAT THEY DO IT. ugh. anyways kaoru was always my favorite of the two bc i love a man thats in tune with his own emotions. i like hikaru in theory but i think if i knew him in real life i would murder him. i am also obsessed with their characterization and backstory in general bc their specific brand of trauma is one that i so rarely see represented in media and i think they had a very realistic response to it?? like they're genuinely very well written characters i like them a lot. i could also probably write an essay about them

kyoya. im obsessed with him. hes a genius. hes an asshole. he runs a literal profitable business pimping out his besties. girls somehow like him despite him never actually showing affection to any of them in canon. hes literally the worst person alive. hes genuinely kindhearted despite everyone in his life attempting to beat it out of him. hes GAY. this is a joke mostly but i truly think that every decision in his life post-middle school is made because he is obviously, painfully in love with tamaki and also completely oblivious to this fact. like the show might attempt to make you think that hes got a thing for haruhi but literally every decision he makes is for tamaki's benefit (the manga is even MORE explicit about this btw and it makes me insane) and the entire time hes in denial about the fact that tamaki is literally everything to him. it's hilarious. "and so kyoya met him" uhhh fellas is it gay to consider the single most important event in your life to be meeting another man

i kinned honey in middle school for real and every time i think about it i want to die. i unfortunately still like cake. and rabbits. and i am still blonde and short. i might be haunted by this character for the rest of my life

i didn't get the appeal of mori at first tbh which might be a result of watching the anime 2 million times but never reading the manga LMAO bc he really is just a filler character in the show. but hes fun and i like him well enough. im sort of hoping he gets a little more room to be a real character in the manga tho bc ive like. just gotten out of the chapters that were adapted directly into the show so we're in uncharted territory now. im waiting for his chapter im SURE its coming

#I WISH THEY KEPT MORI'S LITTLE BROTHER IN CHIKA'S EPISODE OF THE SHOW. LITTLE MORI IS SO CUTE :((#finally an excuse to talk into the void about ouran #my discord server is so tired of me sending 'me and who' with every screenshot of haruhi and tamaki i can find #im so normal guys i promise #asks

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thewriterowl · 1 year

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I just can't get this idea out of my head Ms. Owl! I'm literally thinking about it at work...work!

Okay so what would happen if in Blooms Luke gets a personal guard. You know someone to make sure nothing happens to him whenever his dad, and husband aren't there. So this personal guard instead of hating Luke and being a complete asswipe like Nis the bitch (and yes that is his official nickname for me), absolutely adores him....a little too much...if you know what I mean.

So this guard is infatuated with Luke, and wants to marry him so he (stupidly) decides to court him. And Luke being Luke doesn't realize it (Din didn't court him so he doesn't know what it looks like especially for mandalorians), he thinks the guard is just being nice, and is so happy to make a new friend.

Until he's sitting down at dinner one night with Anakin, Din, and Grogu and they ask him how the guard treats him (no repeats with the Nis the bitch situation). So Luke tells them everything and shows them the gifts the guard got him with a big grin on his face because hey, he has a new friend and he's just so happy about it.

And Anakin and Din just freeze. In pure horror, and shock with a fork full of food and mouth agape. How dare someone Court Luke! He's married for force sake! That's their Luke! Their light! Their everything! And so...of course they confront this unworthy swine! But the guard's all like "Unlike the two of you...I never had intentions to harm him. I never made him cry except out of pure joy...so who's really unworthy?"

What would they do. What would they say? How would it go?

And of course the biggest question of all.....would the guard die?

omg yeeeeeeees

imagine, Luke is just so used to bad things that when people are nice to him all he can really understand is "nice person! friend!" and does not understand the concept of romance very well at all. To him, there is just Din and no one else would do the same things with Din's intentions. So this guard is just being a nice person and a great friend! He's so excited and completely oblivious to it all.

Anakin and Din are horrified and furious. They are not used to people feeling such a way for their Luke. Someone trying to get close and take him from them in such a way...it almost doesn't compute. but it does..and they will NOT let someone else come in to take him. Luke belongs to them.

The man is safe at first. They give him a pretty clear warning with crazed, cold eyes to back-off. If he does so, he can be re-assigned and there would be no harm or foul against him. If not, they wouldn't kill him (as he would have broken no laws and Din has to keep legal with these things) but they will make life a living hell for him.

If he did anything terrible to their Luke...yeah, then he'll die. But other than that, they are bound by their royal status to not just go ape-shit...and they can't hurt Luke who would be so sad if something bad happened to the man.

But yeah, the guy is not gonna be around in some way. Luke belongs only to them, thanks. Jealousy is not a pretty sight on these two.

#owl inbox #bloomsday #dark

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rat-cigars · 2 years

Text

Damn Bitch You live like this?

masterlist

(a/n: there’s not much romance on the Edward side these next few chapters but dw, y’all are gonna get that Stockholm shit eventually. As always be mindful of triggers and 18+ )

***Bruce POV)

*Reader POV)

(TW: incel , kidnapping, bondage stuff, angst, physical grabbers, )

Wc: 1322

Possible Spoilers in this chapter

Afab!Reader (she/her) pronouns

Chapter 21: Chains and Calls

***Bruce had never been one to worry himself over you. Aside from the night you’d been mugged of course, but it was because he had helped you as Batman. Plus he did feel a little guilty for walking in the first place, being too shy to ask him or Alfred to take you.

Bruce had tried his hardest to be kind with you, seeing the unfortunate situation the media had placed you both in, but he did still keep his distance, needing to focus on his main work.

The week you’d spent recovering he had done his best to indulge in light conversation with him, both sharing little stories from your very different lives. It had been odd for him to open up a little, but he figured it was probably a time killer for you and it kept you oblivious to his work as the Batman.

You’d teased him about not even getting to meet the guy who had helped you, but he had simply rolled his eyes at your remarks, ignoring them.

The night you asked to get a ride down to Edwards at the hotel he was worried about the press seeing them out alone, and he didn’t want the trip to cut into his meetings with Gordon. But luckily for him the hotel wasn’t too far and you had ended up staying the night anyways.

The morning after you’d decided to stay the night he was asleep in his bed until 4pm, only getting up to go to the restroom and to speak with Alfred.

You had texted him an update letting him know you were at work and he just replied with an okay, and continued with his day.

After a few days of only texting though Bruce started to worry about you, plus the location on your phone had been tampered with. This in mind he had decided to stake out the RedRoom Inn, but to his disappointment, Edward never got caught bringing anything too suspicious. Bruce had even followed him home a couple times to no avail. He couldn’t pin it on the strange man, but he had a gut feeling that something was about to happen.

*Waking up hours after Edward had left the sun glared in your eyes, he had left the closet door open, allowing a bit of natural light in. You groaned sitting up, finally getting out of the daze you’d been in. Edward had to rush, being late to work, but this had caused him to leave your phone out. Leading to you hearing the familiar ringtone, jolting up and rustling the chains.

Your heart skipped a beat but you knew Edward was watching, waiting for you to make a sudden break for it.

You glanced down and suddenly felt adrenaline coursing through your body as you realized he had forgotten to click the cuffs on your wrist shut completely. Quickly you checked your ankles, throwing off the restraints first and then stood, hurrying to remove your wrists cuffs. With a fast paced limp, you rushed to the room where the noise continued to ring, knowing you had limited time. You quickly picked up the device, seeing the caller ID light up a name that had become more familiar to you these past few months.

“Bruce!” You squealed and answered, hyperventilating into the phone's mic as you quickly shouted for help, “Bruce! Please! Dear God, you have to help me!” You sobbed, hearing his breath hitch on the other end he listened. “I-I’m at-!” You stopped, freezing as the main door clicked, and the call suddenly dropped. Rendering the phone useless to you now. “Y/n!” Edward yelled out, heavy thuds filling the empty walls. “I don’t want to fight! Please just come out and I’ll understand..” The end was spoken with a hint of that shyness from when you’d first met him.

But knowing that your only hope of escaping had been promptly removed, you didn’t move, just watching the entrance to the room. “Ah, there you are my love..” he cooed and walked into the room casually, sighing as he ran a hand through his hair. “Oh honey, we were having such a good time..” he adjusted his lenses and looked at you, “it’s a shame you’re so determined to ruin it.” He laughed and grabbed you by your hair, dragging you down and to the closet once more.

“It was a mistake to leave in such a rush this morning!” He was mad now and you felt it through his rough tugs. “Too bad you couldn’t behave.” He growled at you, making sure to clip the cuffs tighter than before.

You just allowed him to react, having no urge to fight in the moment. “I’m sorry..” you tried appealing to his kinder side and for a second it worked, he relaxed and smiled his kind smile at you.

“I know darling.. I just need you to understand everything.” He sighed and gently ruffled your hair, the touch made you cringe once more. “Understand what?” You questioned him and Edward stood, leaving you down on the mat. “You’ll see it soon my love..” he spoke softly and then walked out, slamming the closet door shut.

You were left to sob alone again, but a small hope was growing once again in you. You had managed to contact Bruce, actually he had called you first. But the luck from Edwards' mistake had run out before you could’ve given him details. Maybe he would get Batman to look for you. You questioned these ideas as you cried yourself to sleep, curling into a ball on the cold floor.

**Bruce had eventually caved into his curiosity of your whereabouts, deciding to call you himself. But nothing prepared him for your response to his call. He had heard you shriek in a panic his name, and before he could even speak you’d continued. Crying loudly for help and as you were going to spill an idea of your location, the call dropped.

He had started to breathe heavier in a panic at the call, wondering where you had gone was just the beginning. Bruce was quick to call back multiple times but to his dismay, none of the calls even rang through. Throwing his phone down in anger at the situation he rushed to the cave, checking to see if your location had managed to pop up on his screen against butt there was nothing. No ping since the hotel, but he couldn’t just bust in there with no clear reason, especially as Batman.

Alfred had followed him down, watching his eyes trail through the logs of your phone's last locations. Alfred left soon after realizing it was going to be a long night for Bruce, prepping some coffee in the kitchen for him. Bruce hadn’t paid much attention when Alfred had been around him, only giving a nod in response when Alfred informed him of the pot sitting out on the counter for him. “Get some sleep, you need it.” Was the latest remark Alfred said before heading to his own room to rest

But Bruce didn’t sleep much that night, focused on finding the location of you. He was still feeling guilty over the attack and now with you being in immediate danger, it lit a fire under his ass.

Bruce had researched through the night, waking up the next morning at the desk, all his notes sprawled out. This was going to be a long fall for everyone.

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sastiel-is-my-serotonin · 1 year

Text

I have some more OCs to share, Isaac and CJ. I'll let these writing snippets introduce them:

The door was thrown open, and Isaac just stared at his twin, waiting.

"What?" CJ groaned.

Isaac let the air become awkward before pointing at CJ, "You look funny."

"And you wish you were funny." CJ answered, flipping him off, which Isaac mirrored.

"Momma," Isaac called out of the room, still flipping off CJ, "CJ is flipping me off!"

There was a loud sigh from the kitchen, "You two are practically adults, I don't care!" She called back to them.

"Wow," CJ said, "Mom doesn't care about you, sucks to be you."

Isaac mocked her and left the room, making sure he didn't close the door all the way, just enough for it to piss CJ off.

She tried to throw a pillow to close it all the way but missed, "He is such a bitch." She mumbled into her pillow.

She threw another pillow lazily and that one of course made it. Why? Because the universe thinks it's a comedian or something.

–

CJ was grabbing a pizza slice for themselves,

"Can you hand me another one?" Isaac asked, passing CJ the cup they were searching for.

They grabbed it, saying, "No." before passing the exact slice Isaac had been wanting.

Their Dad watched so confused but proceeded to not say anything because they would just confuse him more.

—

"and it just went right over her head." Isaac explained, having his hand go right over his head.

"People these days, huh?" CJ said, messing with a hair tie he had managed to steal from Isaac's hair.

"Seriously," Isaac groaned, "they're so oblivious."

CJ just nodded along as he aimed the hair tie towards Isaac who just frowned.

"What happened to people being more observant?" CJ asked, and looped the band around his hair.

Isaac looked suspicious of his twin but didn't say anything about it, "I don't know man."

"Anyways," CJ said getting up, "thanks for the twenty."

"Jokes on you," Isaac lied down, "I stole it from your dresser."

"And I stole it from your room."

Isaac is pretty sure he stole it from CJ before that as well but it didn't matter, "You're not even going to spend it on yourself."

"Wow," CJ scoffed, "I might've." He definitely wasn't going to, there's a reason Isaac has been able to steal it from him multiple times.

"Uh-huh," he said knowingly, "you know the world won't end if you decide to do something nice for yourself every once in a while."

CJ was working on it, but it was difficult, "It might. It stormed when you decided to be nice to me for once."

"I'm always nice." Isaac joked.

"To who?"

"People." He said.

CJ, who had been pushed off the bed just twenty minutes ago by him, can't help but feel like that's not exactly true. "I guess I'm not people then."

"Course not," Isaac sat up, "nah we're indigenous creatures and every other variation of whatever people's ignorance comes up with."

Fucking indigenous creatures they both thought to themselves. Gotta love ignorance.

"I blame you for that." CJ said.

"How?"

"Cause you're an ugly creature."

Their little sister, Kayla looked at them both with a what the fuck expression, "You two share the same face."

"Yeah, but I wear it better." CJ said, flipping his hair dramatically.

Isaac rolled his eyes, "The original is always better."

CJ tsked, "I kicked you out and honestly, my bad, now you gotta live with a good personality to get anyone."

"Oh, yeah," Isaac started, "because if there's anything I want, it's definitely a relationship. Yep. Uh-huh, I do the romance thing, for sure."

"You still make friends don't you?"

"Nah, I just steal yours. We look similar enough."

"Yet, people mistake me as you."

Isaac back peddled a little bit, "Hey, why don't you get any dates? I mean I'm aroace, what's your excuse?"

"Once again, people mistake me as you." CJ said exasperated, "And I confuse too many people."

"I mean yeah, that makes sense. You're really weird."

"I was talking about my gender."

"That's not what makes you weird," Isaac said nearly sounding offended at that thought, "in fact, I think that's the one normal thing about you, the rest, I don't know man." Isaac teased and CJ flipped him off.

"Are you two done yet?" Kayla asked annoyed as she rummaged through Issacs's stuff. Which he just ignored.

"You know what," Isaac said looking at CJ, "I was being mean, come here."

CJ didn't trust him for a second but he never gets to hug Isaac, so he hesitantly accepted the hug.

Isaac patted CJ's back and then left his own room, CJ pulled his hair to the front, yep. "That fucker stole the hair tie back."

Their Mom who had just walked by and heard was confused, "Didn't I just buy you both your own packs?"

"Yes, which we appreciate a lot, but it's the principle, that one just keeps getting stolen."

"Oy, I blame your Dad for all of you being so weird." An echo of "Hey's", including her husband, echoed in the house cracking her up.

They're so fun to write, if you have any questions about them, ask away, I'd love to ramble about them!

#I don't have a cemented plot for them #Got some ideas floating around but I just wanted to write them regardless if I had a plot or not #CJ Calobaro #Isaac Calobaro #The tags are so I don't forget their last names lol #I tend to misplace my character sheets and references so...

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phoenixdragon1258 · 1 year

Text

Watched Robert Pattibson The Batman yesterday and i love him

The autism is strong in this one [affectionate]

Catwoman kisses him several times and each time he's just like ???

Gets to the point ehere like near the end the two of them are talking and he leans in a bit but not in a initiating romance way but in a this is how our previous interactions have gone so ig this is a thing people do way

He goes look at me and then lifts her chin to stare directly into her eyes

And then goes "looks good" and moves on

Hes so oblivious i love him

Who im tryina be tbh

Alao him just leaving rooms

No fabric rustling to clue the audience in either he just simply is not there when the camera pans back

He doesnt even do a voice as batman it is just Bruce Wayne

If the fockin riddlor can connect the dots anyone can

Esp if B decides to do some public appearances or like anything at all with his family's fortune

That one dweeb he beat up recognised him also so like B-man. Come On.

Him just casually knowing the way to tell that homeboys thumb was removed while still alive like

Autism moment

His tech, just rewatching what hes seen earlier in the day, him chilling in a literal cave, him not noticing the passage of time and also having the mindset of this is what is supposed to happen, why isnt it doing that

Autism moment

ALSO THE FUCKIN EVERYONE ELSE IN THE CAST

Bangers dude, bangers

We got Alfred mine beloved, casually doing cyphers over breakfast

We got Con O'Neil, Izzy Fockin Hands, being noticably shorter than the B-man but also not giving a shit about it (chiuaua energy)

Leta Lestrange pullin up as well, we do not need to aknowledge that as my point of reference for Zoë Kravitz, being pretty and girlboss and sexualized but in a way that is she is in control of that perception- except for when no-nuance Bruce just fuckin binoculars through her windows (bitch) - also there was definitely smth between her and Annika and i lobe that for them casual rep hell yeah

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provisionalsparkle · 3 years

Text

The Boy Next Door

Reader x Bang Chan (Stray Kids)

[Genre] exes-to-lovers au, smut, angst.

[Word count] 6.7K

[Warnings] Smut. Angst. Unprotected sex, voyeurism, ample description of bodily fluids.

[Note] This is my contribution to @feliix ’s Summer 2 Lovers collab! Check it out!

Summer.

The season of fun and sun, careless joy, long days and warm nights…

For most people.

For you, this summer is about change. It’s about the little town you used to live in, the quaint house you grew up in, the smell of your mother’s cooking or the breeze from the yard, the sound of younger kids playing in the street. It’s about the big city you will go to live in, it’s purple and orange twilight skies, black silhouettes reaching toward the skies beginning to twinkle with golden lights, the noises of the traffic coming from evening bustle, the scent of the delis and restaurants that line the streets.

You were stuck between these two places, university having been a four year long limbo of boundless sex mislabeled as self-discovery, and now visit your home one last time, reminding yourself of the life you had there before moving on to another.

You think of the past with nostalgia, yet also with a restlessness that makes you want to run from everything. The stillness, the silence, the unchanging landscape in this little town is too unbearable, too unsettling. But it’s familiar, and it’s comfortable. The life you’ll soon live promises excitement, autonomy, it’s the adulthood you’ve fantasized about. It terrifies you too, and you have these horrible dreams about missing the payment of the most insignificant bill and having the entire world collapse on you because of it. You still don’t know how to do your taxes.

College is over, a new life awaits you in a big city after landing a rather ideal job, but it felt like you were leaving things behind. Funny how, after so many years of fantasizing about this grown-up life you suddenly felt like a lost child, scared to forgo the familiar.

It’s these sort of almost-quarter-life-crisis thoughts that fill your mind on a particularly warm afternoon. You’re indecently splayed out on a couch with as little clothing as possible, the door to the backyard is wide open, letting an occasional breeze waft in to disrupt the stifling stillness of the heat. The lights are off, and you were too unbothered to turn them on as the sun set, preferring to stare at a darkening ceiling as the evening sky turned purple.

There’s a familiar jingle of keys from the front door.

“Honey? You home?”

“I’m here, Mom.” You lazily answer back. She wanders from the hall to the living room, you can feel the judgemental look she gives you.

“Have you been laying like this all day?”, indignation lines her voice. Was it so surprising to find you like this?

“Yeah…”

“You can’t just lay here all day. Go out! Get some sun! Go play with those kids you used to hang out with from school!”

“I can’t Ma, I’d rather just plank here.”

“Oh goodness, Y/n. Give me one good reason you shouldn’t go hang out with them!”

“I’ll give you two: either they grew up to be total bitches or they had kids and became a bore.”

“I didn’t become a bore when I had you!” She exclaims, although it’s not too serious and some playfulness hides beneath the surface.

“Yeah, that’s because you’re a cool mom. They don’t make those anymore.”

“Hmm… well, I think you should make a bit of an effort.”

“Mom… it’s my last vacation you know -”

“You know what?!” She suddenly exclaims, her voice brightening like a lightbulb just radiated in her thoughts. “Mrs. Carson’s son is here with her for the summer too! I bet you haven’t seen him in ages, and he’s gotten so handsome.”

“Mrs. Carson?” You didn’t have any clue who that was.

“Well… you might remember her as Mrs. Bang, but Jane changed her name when she married Norbert a few years ago. She still lives next door and Christopher’s in town spending the summer with his mother.”

Bang…

Christopher…

You hadn’t heard that name in years. It surprised you a bit actually, and a hint of a smile came to your lips.

“Yeah, yeah, Mom… I’ll think about it.”

You wouldn’t admit… something did grab your attention. A curiosity of sorts.

You were fifteen years old when you had your first kiss. He was a short boy with a kind smile, a bit awkward really, but you had a fondness for him. It wasn’t about looks at all, all boys at that age were hideous and nothing would change your opinion on that, but you’d swoon whenever you saw him. It was mutual, an icky teenage infatuation that had your friends poking fun at both of you whenever you’d become giddy at the sight of one another. Hot faces, nervous glances, trembling innocent touches.

He sat next to you in chemistry and you’d hold hands under the lab table while the teacher gave class. His left hand always felt soft in your right one. Cute. It’s a bit silly but you’re glad you had that sort of adorable and silly romance. While it lasted, that is.

Christopher wasn’t a bad guy. He was stupid, like all boys that age.

When you saw him kissing another girl, of course you cried, but you knew it had to do with him being stupid more than anything. This simple looking girl that you had been friends with in elementary school, you can’t even remember her name.

You know why he did it, beyond his stupidity. Your mom had let it slip long before - you knew it was coming.

“Honey, would you believe? Mr. and Mrs. Bang are divorcing!” Probably just some hot gossip from one of her PTA yoga groups, no ill intention on your behalf. She didn’t know you were seeing Christopher - over your dead body. You were fifteen and a horrible student, you didn’t need to give your mother yet another element to ground you with.

“Oh no…” You acted as normally as you could, your first thoughts went out to Christopher first though. “Do you know why?”

“Well… I’m obviously not going to ask, duh! But I do know that Mr. Bang is taking the kid with him abroad.” What?! What did she just say? Chis is WHAT?!

“I - uh, what?” Act normal, act normal, act normal.

“Aww… sweetie, was he your friend?” Goodness, parents can be so oblivious, but it’s beneficial in this case. She doesn’t pick up on the depression of your mood.

“I guess.” A sniffle is about to threaten your composure so, in your teenage arrogance, you leave before your mother can see your teary eyes.

The subsequent days were strange. You expected Christopher to tell you the news, you expected to comfort him, you expected to live out the rest of your young romance as best as you could. And then… you saw him.

And he said nothing. He was cold, pushed you away. He must be going through a lot of pain, you thought. More days went by and he still said nothing, and his demeanor grew worse, no affection, no smiles. He must be having a hard time, you reasoned.

Sometimes you thought he was on the verge of saying something to you, like he was about to say something and the words threatened to come out but he’d suddenly pull away and swallow them. You didn’t question it really, it was so confusing but you just went with it.

You never held his hand in chemistry again.

Time made you realize that Christopher didn’t want to be with you anymore. You weren’t sure if it was because he stopped liking you, and that hurt a little, but you knew what he was going through, and you stood by him in case he ever chose to open up and cry on your shoulder. You’d be there for him.

When he kissed that girl, it didn’t really surprise you. Damn it, what was her name? You cried, you thought it was because you were ugly and your boobs were still pretty small - stupid reasons.

It took a few months for you to understand the real reason.

He left without saying goodbye. You never spoke to him after he kissed what’s-her-name. Maybe he tried to do so a couple of times, but you ran away or didn’t let him. Or maybe you remembered it that way to comfort you, just so you’d live with the thought that he tried to apologize, tired to make things right.

But the fact of the matter is he didn’t speak to you and he didn’t say goodbye. He didn’t want to.

He didn’t want to say goodbye because it hurt.

He was trying to ruin your relationship so you’d break up with him and he wouldn’t have to say goodbye, so that he could kill the feelings you had for him to spare you from the pain of his departure.

Or maybe you were just imagining it like that to make it a cuter memory and think about it fondly.

Maybe in the end, Christopher was just a horny teenage boy that cheated on you. Maybe.

Regardless, you giggle as you think back on the silliness of it all, and how serious and life altering it all felt in your childishness. It seemed so long ago, so distant, and you were so changed that it felt like it had all happened to a different person. You wondered about the man next door, and the entirely different boy who had once been next door. What kind of person had Christopher become?

University did you well. It was four solid years of irresponsible drinking and uninhibited sexual exploration paired with relatively easy academics. You don’t know how it happened, but it had been like a transformation from one day to the next.

You, sort of, kind of, absolutely plain and normal girl that no one would notice lest you stepped in their line of sight. One day, there you were - normal.

Two weeks in - boom. Confident. Your roommate was an okayish girl, another plain one. Then you started noticing how comfortable you were undressing in front of her, to change clothes or whatever, as if it was the most normal thing in the world - which it was. Wearing shorts and skirts became less of a worry, just something that felt better. Sometimes you’d be thrown icky glances from some boys, which you hated, but others were acceptably flirty and you loved those. The best ones were the boys that would get shy and who would quickly whip their heads the other way once you caught them staring.

That definitely flipped the switch. It made you feel strong, it made you feel damn good. You, who at the most had dipped a finger into the world of heavy makeouts during high school, now became a seasoned seductress of all kinds of men. So long as you could wrap them around your finger with your demeanor, so long as you could prowl over them and take the lead.

Ah… the good old days.

What was going to happen now, though? Four years later, no slightly inexperienced men left to be wowed. Everyone you knew was turning into a bland and bitter office worker. Was this the end of it?

To think that you’d be ending this glorious chapter of your life in this tiny town, lounging on the same stuffy couch in the same hot living room every day, having your routine philosophical melodrama where you’d stare at the ceiling in the afternoons until your mother came in inquiring if you were alive. It was a terrible fate.

A few days after the revelation of Christopher’s presence, which you would never admit had been circling your mind nonstop, your mother returns with another piece of information.

“You know, Jane and Norbert are having a get together of sorts next Saturday - just the usuals from the block.”

“Is that so?” You said with disinterest.

“In fact, I borrowed a baking pan from her last week… why don’t you go over and give it back to her for me? She might need it, and you probably haven’t left this house in days.” You didn’t reply, but you could feel her eyes on you, waiting for you to obey.

“Fine…”

The afternoon was enjoyably fresh, although your white t-shirt stuck to you like a second skin, the bikini top you wore underneath tracing its silhouette into the cotton. You lazily stomped your way to the house next door, admiring the tall window where you had snuck into Christopher’s room a couple of times during your short romance. A ladder was perched up against the exterior toward that window, they must have been fixing things up. The porch was full of cans of paint, tools, boxes. It was only when you rang on the doorbell, begrudgingly holding the large tray, that you realized that Jane might not be the one to open the door but instead it could be -

The door swings open and you gasp. Christopher.

Well… his face hadn’t changed much. But he was slightly taller than you remembered, far more masculine, oh, and he wasn’t wearing a shirt. Yeah, he was shirtless… jeans hanging low on his hips… shirtless… abs… fit waist… arms…

“Hi! Is Jane home?” Good… pretend you don’t remember him.

“I - Uh… no, my mom’s actually out right now.” He replied. His voice had grown deeper, and where did he get that accent? Wait - did he not remember you? Now, that just made you angry, but you wouldn’t let it show.

“Oh, well… my mother wanted me to return this.” You say handing him the tray, avoiding trailing your eyes downward.

“Yeah, sure. I’ll give it to her.” He says. He seems a little frozen, an expression between surprise and caution lingers on his face, but you don’t know if it’s good or bad.

There’s a moment of silence where you just stare at each other.

“Y/n…” He finally says. There’s hesitation in the way he says your name. He’s scared, not of you, but he’s scared about the fact that you’re on his doorstep.

You don’t say anything, calmly, almost coyly, waiting for him to continue. You’d gotten rather good at pretending you were calm, and the slightest tint of a smile painted your lips so you wouldn’t seem cold or ingenuine.

“Do you remember me?” He asks. You can’t help but huff, a tiny laughter really.

“Of course. You know, you haven’t grown much taller.”

With those slightly playful words, you turn to walk back to your home, and with each step your impression of the encounter with your childhood love became more bitter and less sweet.

It was strange how you thought about him, about it. The situation, that is. Seeing him, talking to him, both of you now being older. A few days of thinking now.

You don’t know why you thought about it so much, but you thought about it. You thought about it without knowing how you felt about it or what you thought about it. This man you had only gotten a glimpse of, too overwhelmed to take in his features properly, now walks around your mind freely. He wasn’t the boy you knew. He wasn’t the boy next door whose hand you’d once hold in chemistry, who you’d kiss before turning the corner towards both of your homes. The boy who left all those years ago.

No, it wasn’t that boy. It was that man, who kept perturbing you. What did you feel? Interest? Yes, there was something quite intriguing about all of this which sparked your curiosity. Lust? Of course, absolutely, the man next door looked divine. Suppose you could abstract the person from his body, so that you wouldn’t be so bothered by who he was and what he meant to you, and you’d easily bend over in front of him and invite him in.

You supposed a conversation was in place, though, because after all, he was still the Christopher. You couldn’t just go around fucking people like that anymore - unfortunately. That was something you got away with in college. It’s a shame college boys grow up to be boring men, sex gets more boring, they think they have all the authority… Maybe you should go back to school.

You’re sitting on the windowsill of your second floor bedroom, one leg hanging out and stepping onto the roof. Opposite to your window, beyond a neat shrub, is the window of the guest room of Mrs. Carson, formerly Bang, which seems unchanged from when you last saw it. You remember watching her from your room, also unchanged, using the TV in there to do some aerobics she followed along from a VHS… was it a VHS? No, that’s the machine. What were the things you used to put in the VHS? A cassette? No… regardless, eventually she must have started using DVD’s.

Damn it, it all seemed like thousands of years ago.

Damn it, you were still so melodramatic throwing around words like poetry over some Richard Simmons tape. Aha! It’s a tape!

Your crotch is being dug into by the window frame, and you let your weight rest on it, the slight grind tempting you to have a round of masturbation. But you’ll finish the cigarette you stole from your mother first. It tasted awful, it was another adult thing you couldn’t understand. Why did everyone at university smoke so much? It was just another thing their eager teenage selves did to emulate the adults in grown-up world, to feel a little more grown-up. Who the hell likes this stuff?

But you liked watching it burn, occasionally inhaling its airy and bitter smoke. It wasn’t your preferred type of smore. You preferred watching papers and matches burn, their sweet and rich smell, the warmth of the fire that would sting the edges of your fingers. Shame your mother only used a lighter, you didn’t like the smell of that fire either.

You just surrendered to watching the bright tip of the cigarette and the white streams that came from it.

“You know those are bad for you.”

“Jesus fucking Christ!” You exclaimed, your heart nearly jumping out from your chest. A man had sprung out from the window in the guest room of the Carson house, formerly Bang, and that man was Christopher Bang himself.

“Sorry I didn’t -”

“You almost gave me a fucking heart attack - what the hell?!”

“ - mean to startle you…”

“Damn it, Christopher!”

“Ah! So you do remember me?” He says with a bit of joy, but you just look at him, realizing that this is where the talk will come. His features grow a little more somber. He continues, “So… I guess I -”

“Where’d you get the accent?” You interrupt, genuinely curious. “You sound like the crocodile hunter.”

“Well… I was living in Australia with my dad.” He says it in a normal tone, but you make sure it doesn’t stay normal.

“Oh, so that’s where you went?” You both wince at what you just said. Yep, it’s finally time for that talk.

There’s a bit of silence, but you’ll let him be the one to fill it.

“I…” He sighs deeply. Uuhh… it’s quite a masculine sigh. “I didn’t know you’d be here. I didn’t think I’d ever see you again but I… there’s something I’ve always wanted to say.”

“I’m listening…” You say. It’s a flat tone, but it’s funny. You hope it’ll ease him.

“I wanted to say I’m sorry.” Some silence again, “I’m sorry for being an ass, I’m sorry for cheating on you -”

“Chris, we were like fifteen… you kissed a girl with braces, big deal.” You waved it off. Really, kissing that girl didn’t bother you so much, now almost ten years later.

“I left without saying anything.”

“Yeah, you did. Hard to not notice.”

“I was - I know it’s not an excuse, but I was going through a lot and I didn’t want to hurt you.”

“So you left without saying anything?”

“I’m sorry.”

“It’s ok… we haven’t spoken in years. I practically forgot about it.” No you didn’t.

“Did you?” He says. Was he hopeful when you insinuated he hadn’t hurt you as much as he thought he had?

“No, not really. I mean, yeah, you kissing another girl was pretty insignificant, we were just kids. It did hurt that you left without… I don’t know… There wasn’t any closure. There wasn’t a goodbye. I felt confused for a while, I guess.”

“I’m so sorry about that. But my parents were splitting up, I was going to have to leave everything behind. You were the first girl I loved and I was going to have to say goodbye and I couldn’t handle it. I was too hurt and embarrassed to even tell my friends. I wish I had done it differently.”

“Yeah, I wish you had too. I wanted to be there for you, you know? I wanted to hug you, hold your hand, tell you it was going to be ok.

“I really messed up there…”

“It’s okay Chris, you were just a kid. We were just kids.” You offer your sympathy but he doesn’t soften.

“Mhmm. Doesn’t make me feel less guilty about it.”

“Can I ask you something?” He nods, “Did you do all that stuff… you know, treat me that way, for real or where you…?”

“I was hoping you’d break up with me, get over me. That way we wouldn’t have to say goodbye and we wouldn’t get hurt.”

“I got hurt.” You admit.

“I’m sorry.”

“Stop apologizing.” You insist. “It’s fine. We’re fine. We’re old and grown and fine. All of that’s in the past, I can’t blame you for acting like a kid. It’s okay.”

“Well I can agree with you there. We did grow up, not kids anymore.”

“You didn’t grow that much.” You laugh, he laughs too.

“You certainly did.” He’s being flirty. It could have been bad timing, but the mood felt right.

“Oh, you noticed?”

“Hard not to.” Goodness was he being direct. “You were really cute back in school, I had a crush on you for like, forever.”

“Really…Plain old me?”

“Really. And now here we are and I think I could have a crush on you all over again.”

“So you can go off and kiss another girl with braces and leave the continent?”

“No, I’m a one woman man.” He says while making himself comfortable on his own ledge. It’s getting comfortable overall, like you’re talking to someone you’ve known for the longest time, like a decade of separation didn’t do much harm.

“Well, well. And who is that lucky woman now?”

“There’s no one at the moment. I’m in the middle of some life changes.”

“Do tell.”

“I’m moving back. Well, not here, just in the country again. A big city, big job, kinda scary.”

“Seems we’re on the same boat. I just came back to say goodbye to this place forever and I’m ooout.”

“Did you finish school already?”

“Yeah… I wish I hadn’t though.” You think back on your experience with longing, lamenting it’s end.

“Wow, can’t relate. I couldn’t wait for it to end. What’d you miss about it?”

“Well, I didn’t have to work, grades were good and easy. And I guess, it was tons of fun.”

“How so?”

“Being on a campus full of horny and stupid guys - it was open game.” Chan hisses at your admission.

“I wouldn’t have taken you for that type.” He chuckles, “You would stutter for like the first two months we went out.”

“We were just kids.”

“I guess we were…”

Another comfortable silence as you stare off at the sky, your cigarette burnt through with only the spongy bud left to pinch.

“Chris?”

“Yeah?”

“I’m single too, you know.”

It might have been a bad idea, you said it on impulse after all, something quite instinctive having taken over you. Maybe you were just horny and Christopher was just hot, regardless, the conversation was over. Before he could even process what you said, and the implications to it, you had already slipped back into your darkened room and out of his sight.

Chan felt like a teenager again. Not in a good way.

Chan remembered your first kiss, holding your hand. He remembered your breasts being the first he had ever really noticed, your legs being the first he ever caressed. He remembers how you’d press your bodies together while you kissed, not really understanding what both of you felt, only understanding the urgency of it.

Now he can name those feelings, the ones that once belonged to an inexperienced boy, merely dipping his toes into the surface of that world. But now that he dove, and had dived into its waters several times, he knew how to swim in them.

Yet, seeing you made him feel like he didn’t. It made him feel like he couldn’t swim, like he couldn’t breathe. He felt like he was drowning.

The first moment he saw you on his doorstep he felt his stomach drop, a pang of guilt that had lingered on his mind during countless of sleepless nights hitting him with full force. He didn’t expect it. He thought he would never see you again.

And after taking another look, a longer look, it was like he was swimming in completely different waters. He felt submerged, and he didn’t know which way was up. He wanted to open his mouth and swallow it all up, let you drown him.

He hadn’t felt this raging feeling since he was a teenager. He certainly hadn’t had a specific woman make him feel like this until you.

It made him feel another kind of guilt. Shame even.

The following days he’d watch you, shamefully. His mother had him painting the house and when he stood on the rooftops he took his time to enjoy the view of you swimming in your pool, wearing tiny bikinis that stuck to your skin and showed the buds of your niples and the lines of your labia through the fabric. He would admit, shamefully, that he stopped watching from the roof because he needed to get closer to see these beautiful details.

He now watched you from over the fence in his backyard. Getting incredibly hard watching you swim, watching you oil your body down.

It was all horribly, horribly shameful.

But weren’t you the one that mentioned you were single? It had caught him off guard. He was being cheeky in that moment, but he didn’t know what waters he was testing then. Now he knew, and it was making him behave so, so shamefully.

Should he go over there, push you into a corner of the pool and pull your bottoms to the side? Should he kneel at your feet while your rubbing yourself with that golden oil, and beg you to let him fuck you?

It wasn’t just the thought of sex that drove him mad, it was you in general. How inferior he felt in front of you, like he had to prove himself. Every day he worked shirtless, hoping you’d get a glimpse of him, but you were just so unbothered by it all.

It was driving him fucking insane.

If only you knew.

Except - of course you did. Of course you did. This is what you craved, what you were best at. Driving boys, technically men but boys sounds tastier, to be absolute slaves to their desire for you. Christopher wasn’t doing a good job at hiding it. Did he really think that you would suddenly spend every day swimming in the tiniest bikinis after having not left your couch for over a week? They really are such stupid, fuckable animals.

And Chris was particularly fuckable.

Day four of his perverted project, he was hammering away at some boards in the back porch of his house. Your mother wouldn’t be home for hours, his parents were away for a couple of days.

Everything was perfect.

“Chris?!” You call loudly over the fence from your chaise lounge, carelessly flipping through a book. The hammering stopped, he had heard you. “Chris, it’s hot today. Don’t you think you should come over for a swim to cool down?”

Why on earth were you acting so damn unbothered and confident, he thought. Why on earth were you asking him over?

It’s only a matter of time before he circles his own house and slides in through the gate on your end. He’s still wearing jeans and a utility belt, gloves too. No shirt.

“You can’t really swim in those, take them off.” You hardly peered at him from over your sunglasses. He was just standing there, frozen. That’s usually a sign that you’re working your magic well. Good. “Come on Christopher, take them off.”

“I - uh, I’m actually not wearing trunks right now. Uhm… I’ll be right back.”

“Oh, you don’t have to go.” Insert unbothered page flip. “Why don’t you just undress and get in the pool so I can join you?”

“W-what?” He couldn’t believe what he was hearing. He genuinely thought he had imagined it, maybe all of his hornyness was driving him insane.

“Christopher!” You whine. “You’re ruining the fun!” You slam the book shut and throw it over to the side, taking your sunglasses and hat off. “Chris, I think it’s obvious. Do you think I haven’t noticed you being a peeping tom for the past half week? Look! You’ve already got a tent in your pants and everything!”

“Fuck.” Shit, you were right.

“This is like, hmm, like an open invitation to fuck me.” You say with an eye roll, but your eyes roll toward his abs because they are absolutely distracting you.

“Are… are you serious?”

“Well… You want to, I want to. You’re nice, look like you’ve become quite a decent man - and I’m not just referring to your physique Chris. Maybe, just maybe, it would be an excellent idea if we finally fucked this tension away.”

“Just like that?”

“Just like that. You’re here for a few weeks, so am I. Why not enjoy each other while we can? After that we can just go our separate ways, just like before except we’ll end it on good terms.”

Too many points for him to argue with - you were right on all of them. He couldn’t disagree. In fact, he eagerly agreed. Little did he know you had this pitch rehearsed to perfection, to your benefit, because he seemed to be completely subdued by it.

“Fuck.” He mutters under his breath. Fumbling with his belt, zipper, exposing the line of his abdomen down to his hardening cock. A fat, heavy cock that swung between his muscular thighs. He was fully nude now, standing in front of you, his tan skin glistening in the sunlight. You’re quick to urge him over with a finger.

He pounces, but once he’s crawling over you on that narrow chair, he becomes slow.

“Hi.” You manage to whimper out, now feeling a bit small beneath him, feeling nervous even.

“Hey.” He’s just as nervous but there’s an energy that goes beyond either of your wills pulling you toward one another.

He kisses you. It’s a kiss you melt into, and he sinks his body against yours, with you spreading your legs so he can slot between them. His cock rests against your lower abdomen, his body pressing further into you.

You can’t help but slide your hand between your two bodies in an attempt to finger yourself, prepare yourself, but he stops you and pulls back.

“No.” He growls.

“No?” Is he going to leave you like this?!

“Let me.”

And you do. Chan lowers himself, adjusting you so he can easily bend over the chair while kneeling on the ground, and his hands shake as he dips the tip of his fingers into the hem of your bottoms, just slightly tugging at the material, playing with it before he starts to play with you. You’ve got the perfect view of him basically drooling over you.

He slides the bottoms to the side, but you pull at the strings at your hips, so they come undone and he pulls them away completely. Your lips and the juices coming from between them are just as glossy than your oiled skin.

He can’t help but dig in. Fucking you with his mouth, jamming his fingers in you. It’s an animalistic frenzy and it’s hot and slippery and sticky. You cum and your fluids spill over the impermeable cushion below, pooling under your ass. He can see every sparkling droplet fall from you.

It’s just a haze, he nearly jumps on you, bending your legs nearly over your head, bouncing his pelvis on your cunt like a trampoline, smacking with every thrust. You’re completely glued to one another. If he’s not abusing your mouth with his tongue then he’s biting on your shoulder or grunting, growling, into your ear. It’s filthy. You’re absolutely sure you’ve never been fucked like this.

He cums, several times, as do you. He pulls out each time, jerks himself off on your body, although a couple of times you urged him into your mouth and face. He pulls the triangles on your top to the sides, so your breasts are exposed. He made sure to cum on those too. Semen, sweat, squirt, oil, spit, everywhere there are droplets of your fluids shining on your body like jewels.

It ends with him lying on top of you, nearly sleeping from exhaustion, and your lips feel deliciously sore and sensitive, almost ticklish as he softens inside of you.

It happens again. Several times in fact. Many, many times. When his parents are away, when your mom is away, you fuck all the time. Just a little call of his name over the fence or from your window and he’d be running to you. You were too comfortable with one another to bother with formalities, it was like you’d never been separated. You’d wait for him on all fours, wet cunt on display for him to dive in, but he’d always greet you with a gentle kiss.

Fucking each others faces, drinking eachothers fluids. You even let him fuck you in the ass, multiple times, and he was the first guy to make you cum that way. You were just as hooked and as desperate as he was.

Things started to change though.

The welcoming kisses became longer, you’d talk between the rounds…

You’d fall asleep in his arms, or he in yours.

You’d fuck slowly, deeply, staring into each other’s eyes.

You’d talk to him, tell each other stories of all these years, asi if you had been together the entire time.

You’d smile as you made love, gently. You’d let him cum inside of you.

He’d hold your hand again. They were as soft and warm as you remembered.

You were holding his hand on one particular pink evening, your head resting on his heaving chest, teaching circles into his pecs and nipples. On your bed, in your quiet childhood room. It was a painful silence now. It had been weeks, weeks closer to your respective departure dates.

“I wish I had never left.” He eventually says. You don’t know what to say. “I wish we could have stayed like this for longer.”

“Maybe we would have broken up eventually, or left for college.” You ponder.

“Maybe I would have taken you to prom, or we would have had sex together for the first time…” He returns.

“On this bed? Hmm? With my cute school uniform?” You tease. “Yeah, maybe.”

“But I guess this is what was meant to be.” He sighs, as do you.

“I’m sorry.” Is all you can say.

“What for?”

“I don’t know, I just feel bad. I started this and now we have to go our separate ways again.” You feel something sting in your eye. You can’t cry now.

“Shh…” He coos as he hears you sniffle and feels you twitch. It makes his heart ache like it did all those years ago when he left.

“I - I…” You cry. “I don’t want you to go. I don’t want to go.”

He pulls you into his arms, crushing you in an embrace. Your eyes are closed but you feel the tears fall from his face, he’s crying too.

“I know… but what else can we do?”

There was nothing left to do, other than fuck the days away, crying, holding each other until it hurt. It was a horrible, horrible thing to have fallen in love with Christopher Bang this final summer.

You didn’t go with him to the airport. You didn’t want to say goodbye, you didn’t want to see where he was going.

But he did slip into your room that final night. You made love quietly, he kissed you as you cried.

He said it was the second time he loved you, and the second time he had to leave you.

It hurt much more this time around. Maybe you shouldn’t have done it, maybe you shouldn’t have gone next door.

Being in your house was unbearable once Chris wasn’t next door.

A week later, you’ve arrived at your new place. It had been a whirlwind and you stayed at a hotel the first couple of nights while your new furniture got brought in, most of your personal belongings only fitting in a couple of bags.

It’s kept you busy. That way you think about him a little less. Crying into pillows that have that certain ‘brand new’ smell isn’t quite as comforting as you’d expect. Everything seems unfamiliar, strange, artificial. Nothing here reminded you of him - it was for the best and you hated it.

The place is nice, bright. It’s on the third floor of a small apartment building, a couple of other doors beside yours in the hall. You go downstairs to grab a few packages that have arrived, carefully treading up the stairs in a kind of balancing act once they’re piled in your arms. It’s a choreography you can dance to with expertise, always denying any help from your neighbors.

However, you do fumble with the lock and handle once you’re at your door, holding the boxes up by pressing them against the door with your body as your hands blindly fumble with the keys, nothing but cardboard in your sight.

Nothing you can’t handle, until they start to slip.

“Woah, let me help you with that!” someone says behind you, and in your complicated state it’s a bit difficult to process what happens but the boxes are soon out of the way, said someone pulling them from you and freeing you.

And then you see him.

Him.

Your him.

He says your name and you’re too stunned to react. He’s in awe too. He drops your packages, and you’re certain some of them contain some makeup palettes but you don’t give a damn at the moment.

“What are you doing here?” You finally ask, frozen in place.

“I… live in 304.” He says.

“You live in 304?” He nods. “You? You’re serious?” He nods again, eyes still wide.

You both stand there, processing it all. This can’t be real.

“I live in 302.” you manage to say, after some time. Your voice is weak, all the air has left your lungs. You shake.

“You do?” He asks. Now you nod.

This can’t be.

But he cups your face, holds it like you’re precious and delicate, he kisses you. It is real. You kiss him back, harder. Eventually you’re both clinging to one another, gripping each other’s clothes desperately.

“You live here.” He says, little tears sparkling in the corner of his eyes. You nod, the same tears coming to you.

“I do. Mm-hmm.” The sniffles you let out seem so sweet to him, he swoons with how happy you are to see him. Knowing you feel the same joy he does - it makes him feel complete.

“I live here too!” He cries, laughing, smiling, beautifully.

One more kiss, just to make sure it’s real. You pull him in and kiss him one more time.

It’s real.

#bang chan smut #stray kids smut #skz chan smut #skz smut #bangchan smut

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writemywaytoyourheart · 3 years

Text

Aim For The Heart | Chapter 10: On The Line

Pairing: hitman!jungkook x female reader

Genre: romance, drama, angst, fluff

WC: 4k

Warnings for this chapter: strong language, a gun, everyone is confused about their feelings and oblivious

Tag list; @hopekookies @moonchild1 @barbellastyles98 @teresaisla @ggukkieland @mwitsmejk @scuzmunkie @jaebeomsblackgf @sugaslittlekookies @moon-asia @bangtannie7 @yoonchrisgull @njkbangtan @higashikatasgf @jksbbyfacebunny @kookiesxbananamilk @voidswan @sadxaries @bts-junseagull @jinfused @taehyungiev13 @jadethd @kimnamjoonluvbot @jungkooook @mutterseelenalleinnn @surilirani @patpus @yukiehyukie @crypticsabbat

summary; Jeon Jungkook is an infamous hitman, known for his inability to fail at whatever job is thrown his way. At least, up until now. Y/n, a kind-hearted and full of life teacher, is his newest target. Jeon isn’t sure who would put a hit on this seemingly innocent girl, but fortunately, that isn’t his problem. All he has to do is pull the trigger.

Previous > Next

Jungkook likes you?

The events of today won't stop going around in circles in your head.

You clutch the giant octopus stuffie close to your chest, your legs wrapping around it. Your face is a bright red as you try to calm your breathing.

The more you think about it, the faster your heart races.

You need to calm down.

Mina was mistaken.

Yes, that's all it was.

Mina is always trying to tell you that guys like you, but they never actually have.

She was always trying to boost your self-confidence.

That thought makes you frown.

You don't need or want the approval of a man to boost your self-worth and confidence.

You hug the octopus even tighter as your brows furrow in thought.

A sigh leaves your lips as your heavy eyelids start to close slowly, sleep creeping up on you. You blink your eyes open again. For some reason, you don't want to fall asleep.

A few minutes later, no matter how hard you try to fight it, you inevitably fall asleep, your lips set into a small frown as the worries in your mind find their way into your dreams.

____________________

"So, why weren't you able to kill her yet?"

Tae asks in disbelief as he sits on the couch, watching Jungkook pretend to read his book. Jungkook bites his lip but ignores Tae's question as he flips the page and gets more comfortable on his bed.

Tae glowers at his friend, "I really thought you had a good reason somewhere in that minuscule brain of yours. Apparently, you just have a death wish."

"Can you please be quiet? I'm reading."

"As fucking if you're actually reading!" Taehyung exclaims in exasperation, "Answer me. Why haven't you finished your hit yet?"

"You know why," Jungkook mumbles, his face still in his book.

Taehyung scoffs and leans back, crossing one leg over the other, "Enlighten me."

Jungkook looks at him from over his book, "I already told you why."

"Uhm, no you didn't."

"Yes, I did!" Jungkook exclaims, "I told you I need to know why she's a target!"

"But why??"

"I don't know!"

Taehyung looks at Jungkook like he's got two heads, making the younger squirm under his gaze.

"So, let me get this straight," Tae coughs and points at Jungkook for emphasis, "You, an infamous hitman that has never failed a hit since he was fifteen years old, is hesitating because one stupid little bitch is confusing you-"

"She's not a stupid bitch."

Tae looks at Jungkook in surprise when he comes to the target's defense. He chuckles darkly, "You did not just interrupt me and defend your target at the same time. I know you didn't."

Jungkook swallows thickly, surprised at his own words. But, he can't back out now. So, he clears his throat and sets his book down, "Just because she's a target doesn't mean you can call her a stupid bitch."

"Look," Tae says while he rubs his temples as if Jungkook is giving him a headache by just existing, "If it was that hot Mina girl we were talking about, sure, I'd cut you some slack. But _____? Really? What about her makes you hesitate?"

"I don't know," Jungkook chokes out.

Tae's eyes squint as he watches Jungkook closely, "You make no sense. Your life is on the line, JK. Get the hit done...please."

Jungkook lies down, turning so that Tae can't see his face, "I'm going to get it done."

_____________________

The next morning, you're woken up by a loud knocking sound.

You sit up and rub your eyes, blinking in confusion as you look around your room.

The knocking sounds again and you realize it's coming from outside your room.

"Huh?"

You stumble out of bed, grabbing your starfish plushie and plodding your way to the front door. You open it without looking out the peephole, assuming it would be Mina.

When you see Jungkook standing there, your heart leaps to your throat.

The second the door opens and Jungkook sees you, he feels his heart pinch in his chest. Your hair is a mess, in your face and sticking out every which way. You're still in your pajamas if the long tattered t-shirt that goes to your knees is anything to go by. At first, your eyes were squinty as you looked him up and down, then they widen when you realize it's him.

You let out a tiny gasp and clutch the starfish plushie you're holding to your chest.

Jungkook swallows thickly, "Uhm, hi. I'm sorry, did I wake you up?"

You shake your head, unable to form any words.

Jungkook's face relaxes and he lets out a little laugh, "Ok, good. I wanted to take you somewhere today if you want to?"

You stare at him for a second, Mina's words replaying in your head.

Jungkook starts to shift his weight, wondering why you're just staring at him and not saying anything. He's just about to take back what he said and say he'll come back another day, but then you nod, "Uh, y-yes. I'd l-like that."

"Ah, cool," Jungkook sighs in relief, "Well, I'll let you get dressed. I'll be downstairs when you're ready."

You nod, willing your cheeks not to turn red as you close the door and lean your back against it for a moment.

Once your brain catches up with the rest of you, you head to your room to get dressed. You grab a short white skirt from your closet and pull it on quickly, then you snatch a baby blue sweater and put it on.

After pulling on a pair of white socks, you're about to run out to put on your shoes when Mina's words pass through your brain when you see the make-up on your bathroom counter.

"Jungkook would fall head over heels for you if you did."

"Boys like it when girls try to get fancy for them."

You pout at the make-up for a second, trying to decide if you want to put it on or not. You eventually settle for grabbing the hairbrush and running it through your hair a few times before pulling it into a high ponytail and leaving the make-up where it is.

You smile at your reflection and turn to hurry and get your shoes.

Jungkook looks at a text from Taehyung as he waits for you downstairs.

I hope you're getting it done.

He sighs and puts the phone back in his pocket, then he looks up when he hears the sound of someone coming down the stairs.

You're running down the steps, your hair bouncing up and down and the smile on your lips lighting up your whole face.

Jungkook swallows thickly when you stop in front of him, a small giggle leaving your mouth at the distant look on his face.

She remembered to brush her hair today...

That's the only thought that Jungkook can process at the moment.

Then he notices that you have small dark circles under your eyes, causing him to frown. But he covers it up a second later and gestures towards the black car in the parking lot.

"Oh!" You exclaim when you realize he's going to drive you somewhere, "Where a-are we g-going?"

"It's a surprise," Jungkook mumbles, then he turns and heads for the car.

You go to the passenger's side and climb in, buckling up as Jungkook starts the car.

"I d-didn't know you h-had a car," You say with a laugh as Jungkook pulls out of the parking spot.

He sends you a tightlipped smile, "There's a lot you don't know about me."

That makes you curious.

You turn to him, "Ok, w-what's your favorite c-color?"

"What?"

"Your f-favorite color."

"Uh, why?" Jungkook asks uncertainly.

You look out the front window, "I d-don't know. I always a-ask people that."

"Is it that important?"

"It is t-to me."

"Ah, ok well...I guess my favorite color is red," Jungkook says, keeping his eyes on the road even though he has a sudden urge to turn and look at you, "What about you?"

"I l-love yellow."

Jungkook finds himself smiling softly, then he wipes the smile from his face and clears his throat, "And why is that?"

"I d-don't know. It just m-makes me happy," You say dreamily, looking out the passenger window now, your chin in your hand, "Why d-do you like r-red?"

"I'm not sure. I guess I associate the color with passion and doing the things you love," Jungkook muses as he takes a right turn.

You turn and look at him, watching him closely for a minute before you whisper, "And? A-Are you doing w-what you love?"

Jungkook swallows and glances at you before fixing his eyes on the road again, "No, no I'm not."

You're about to ask him why, but the look on his face makes you hesitate. He looks upset, so you decide to leave it at that.

"Ok, w-what's your f-favorite food?" You ask instead.

That gets a laugh out of Jungkook as he gets into the left lane, turning onto the highway.

"I feel like you're interrogating me," He chuckles.

You laugh, a sound that makes Jungkook's chest feel warm.

"W-Well? Do you h-have a favorite?"

Jungkook smiles and shakes his head, "You're not gonna stop until you know all about me, are you?"

You send him a toothy grin and shake your head, "N-Nope!"

Jungkook sighs, "Well, I don't have a favorite. Honestly, I like anything with flour in it. I like pizza, noodles, churros."

You laugh and Jungkook finds himself fighting another smile, "Ok, well what about you, ___?"

You shrug, causing Jungkook to protest.

"Nuh uh! You have to answer the questions too, missy. You can't just ask me and not have to say anything yourself!"

You laugh again, reaching a hand up to cover your mouth, "But I d-don't have a f-favorite."

"Well, do you like salty, spicy, or sweet the most?" Jungkook insists.

"Sweet!" You shout, making his chest tight with an emotion he doesn't understand as he laughs, "Well, ok then."

A few minutes later, Jungkook pulls into a parking lot where there are a lot of cars.

You hop out of the car and look around in confusion, "W-Where are we?"

"The train station," Jungkook says simply, "We need to take a train to get there."

"Ohh, w-wow," You whisper in awe as you follow Jungkook inside the station, "I've n-never been on a t-train before."

"Really?" Jungkook looks at you in surprise.

You nod, "Mmhm."

You continue to follow behind Jungkook as he moves through the station.

He goes up to a little window and purchases two tickets, then he turns to you, "Our train leaves in ten minutes, we need to hurry."

Jungkook turns and starts walking briskly through the crowds of people, making you almost have to jog to keep up with him.

"J-Jungkook, w-wait up!"

But it's so loud in the station that he doesn't hear you. He's almost out of your sight.

The amount of people crowding around is making your heart beat faster as you start to hyperventilate.

You can't see Jungkook anymore. He's gone. He's gone. He's left you all alone.

"J-Jungkook?" You shout, getting a few judging looks from the people around you.

You turn in a circle, now completely lost.

You don't even know where the entrance is anymore, let alone where your train is.

You're about to start crying when someone touches your arm.

"Hey, sweetie. You all right?"

You turn to see a young man that looks to be about your age smiling down at you. Your heart slows down considerably to see a friendly face, even though you've never met him in your life.

"I'm l-lost," You say with a shaky voice.

The man nods sympathetically, "I could tell. What train are you supposed to be on?"

"I'm n-not sure, m-my friend has th-the tickets."

"Ah, I see. And where did your friend go?" He asks kindly.

"I d-don't know. I lost h-him."

The young man nods again, "Well, I'll help you find him. Come with me," Then he takes your arm gently and leads you through the crowd of people.

"Oh, th-thank you," You say shyly, relieved someone has offered to help you.

"It isn't a problem at all, hun."

When the man leads you to a train with people getting on, you look around in confusion.

Where is Jungkook?

"Uhm," You aren't sure what to say to the man as he starts pulling you towards the open doors of the train.

"I'm sure he's on this train," The stranger says when he sees you hesitating.

There's something in your tummy telling you not to follow him, but he's been so kind...

You decide to look for Jungkook yourself, so you try to pull away from the man, but he holds onto your arm tighter.

"E-Excuse me, I'm just g-going to go this w-way," You tell him with a smile as you point in a different direction.

"No, I'm sure he's on this train-"

"It's o-okay, th-thank you-"

"Look, sweetie. You need to trust me."

"Uhm, p-please don't c-call me that," You try to pull away from him again.

The man holds on tighter and a desperate look comes over his face, "Please, ____. Listen to me-"

"H-How do you know m-my name?" Alarm bells go off in your head as you try once more to pull away from him.

The man lets go of your arm to grab both your shoulders and shake you a little, "He's leading you away. He's going to ki-"

"____?"

You both turn to see Jungkook heading towards you.

You step away from the stranger just as he pulls away from you and runs in a different direction.

Jungkook walks up to you, his brows furrowed, "____, where on earth were you? And who was that guy?"

"I g-got lost. That man s-said he would h-help me," You say tearfully, moving so that you're next to Jungkook.

Jungkook sighs, "You can't just trust anyone ____."

He takes your shoulders and gently turns you to look him straight in the eyes, "Promise me you won't trust anyone. No one."

Your brows furrow but you nod anyway, "Ok, I p-promise."

"Good, now we have to go, our train leaves in two minutes."

Jungkook turns to hurry to your train, but stops in his tracks when he feels a small hand grasp his.

He turns to see you holding onto his hand, your huge eyes looking up at him.

"What are you doing?" He asks, his voice shaking a little.

"I'm s-scared to g-get lost again," You whisper.

Jungkook swallows thickly, then you feel him squeeze your hand and hold it tightly as he pulls you through the station to the train that's just about to depart.

You and Jungkook don't talk much during the ride, Jungkook mostly looking out the window and fiddling with his fingers, occasionally looking at his phone, only to roll his eyes and put it back in his pocket.

You keep thinking about what that strange man said.

"He's leading you away. He's going to ki-"

Who? Who was leading you away?

Jungkook?

You look over at him, watching as he looks out at the trees flying past the windows.

Then you shake your head, Jungkook wouldn't ever do anything bad to you.

An hour later, the train stops and after the location is announced through the speakers, Jungkook stands up and forces a smile onto his face.

"We're here."

You get up and follow him off the train, squinting in the sunlight.

Jungkook leads you out of the station and hails a taxi.

He says something to the driver that you don't hear, then he opens the back door for you and you climb in.

Jungkook slides in next to you.

"W-Where are we g-going?" You ask quietly, still feeling a bit awkward after the train ride.

"You'll see," Jungkook says, and that's all you get.

Fifteen minutes later, the taxi driver pulls over and Jungkook thanks him as he opens the door and climbs out. You step out of the taxi and gasp when you see the ocean sparkling in the sunlight.

"Oh," You breathe, shutting the car door behind you.

You follow Jungkook over to a little area where there is sand and rocks.

Then you break into a run, making your way to the water.

Jungkook watches as you start taking off your chunky tennis shoes and pulling off your socks. You tuck your socks into your shoes and go straight for the waves coming up on the sand.

The second the cold water touches your toes, you squeal and jump back, laughing and turning to Jungkook.

"It's c-cold!" You shriek in delight.

Jungkook walks up to the edge of the waves, not making a move to remove his shoes, so you pout at him and point at his feet, "Take off y-your shoes, s-silly!"

Jungkook shakes his head, "No, thanks."

You shrug, then you turn and run into the water until it's up to your knees, then you shriek again and run back, laughing your head off.

Jungkook purses his lips as he watches you run in and out of the water.

Then he calls out to you when you run out of the water for the hundredth time, "You act like you've never seen water before!"

You smile at him, "I n-never been to the o-ocean!"

After an hour has passed and you're tired of playing in the water, you walk up to Jungkook, who's sitting on a big rock.

"Where a-are all the p-people?" You ask curiously.

Jungkook flips his hair back with his hand and looks at you, "This is a more secluded spot. People prefer to be where there aren't many rocks and stuff."

"Oh."

"Yeah," Jungkook looks out at the water, "Are you having fun?"

A smile breaks out on your face and you nod happily, "Y-Yes! Thank y-you for taking m-me here."

"Of course."

A moment of silence passes, then Jungkook looks over at you, "Can I show you something?"

"S-Sure."

Jungkook leads you over to a bunch of rocks that lead up to a cliff.

He starts to climb them and you feel your stomach flip over with anxiety.

Jungkook turns to look at you when he senses that you're not behind him.

"What's wrong?" He asks.

"I'm s-scared of h-heights," You say in embarrassment.

Jungkook laughs, making you pout.

He stops laughing and climbs down to stand next to you, "It really isn't that high or steep, ____. I'll help you, come on," He holds his hand out to you and you take it cautiously.

Jungkook starts going up the rocks again, keeping your hand in his, which causes your cheeks to burst into flames.

Jungkook himself is fighting the weird feeling in his chest when he feels your sweaty hand holding tightly to his own.

"We're almost there."

A minute later, you've made it to the top.

A few feet away to the right, there's a drop-off that's much higher than where you just climbed up, a straight drop down to the ocean below.

Behind you is a bunch of grass and a pathway leading down the hill to where you just were.

"H-Hey!" You exclaim when you realize something, "We d-didn't have t-to climb that!" You point at the path and Jungkook shrugs while chuckling.

"Don't even say you didn't enjoy it. It was exciting!"

You roll your eyes playfully and walk over to the edge to look over, watching the waves crash around.

"Careful," Jungkook warns, "Don't fall."

"I w-won't," You step back and walk over to sit on the ground next to where Jungkook is standing.

You pat the ground next to you and Jungkook takes a seat.

You two sit there for a long time, just enjoying the scenery.

"Let's c-continue," You eventually say, making Jungkook laugh.

"Continue what?"

You look at him seriously, "W-What is your favorite a-animal?"

Jungkook gives you a half smile and turns to look out across the ocean.

"Uhm, I'm not sure."

You sit there in silence for a minute, then Jungkook lays back on the grass and sighs, "Bunnies are pretty cute."

"Th-That's my f-favorite!" You exclaim.

Jungkook looks over at you as you lie down next to him, "Really?"

"Y-Yeah!"

"Weird."

"W-Well, now y-you have to a-ask me a q-question."

Jungkook looks at the clouds, his mind racing.

"What's the worst thing you've ever done?"

You look over at him to see if he's serious, and see that he looks over at you at the same time, his face far from joking.

"Uhm, one t-time I didn't t-take my medicine for a f-few days...I l-lied to the doctor th-that I took it."

Jungkook looks at you, his brows furrowed.

"That's it? That's the worst thing you've ever done?"

You turn to look at the clouds and think as hard as you can, "Oh, o-one time I accidentally th-threw out a p-picture that one of m-my students d-drew for me."

Jungkook sees a little tear slip down your cheek at your words. He stares at you in disbelief.

"And o-once I didn't listen to m-my mom wh-when she told me to take our d-dog out p-potty. He peed on th-the floor."

"Seriously?" Jungkook asks as he sits up on one elbow.

"I know, I'm h-horrible," You say as you wipe the tears from your cheek and eyes.

Jungkook bites back a laugh, "You're not horrible."

"What a-about you? What's th-the worst thing y-you've ever done?"

Jungkook bites his lip and lays back down, "I'm an angel, I've never done wrong."

"L-Liar," You pout, crossing your arms.

"What do you think is the worst thing I've ever done?" He asks you seriously.

You put a finger to your chin, "Hmm, l-let me think."

A minute later, you speak up again, "I th-think you've p-peer pressured someone t-to do something. But y-you regretted it l-later."

Jungkook looks at you with wide eyes, then he swallows thickly and turns away again, "You're wrong."

Except you weren't.

Jungkook isn't going to tell you that though.

You can get his favorite color and food and animal out of him, but you'll never know him for who he really is.

"Then, w-what is it?"

"Never mind, it was a stupid question. You ask one now."

"Ok...what d-do you love?"

The silence that follows is deafening.

Then a loud ringing sounds and you both jump.

Jungkook grabs his phone out of his pocket and sighs when he sees Taehyung's name across the screen.

"Sorry, I have to answer this."

"Go ah-head."

Jungkook stands up and moves to the side before answering it, "What do you want?" He growls into the phone.

"Did you do it?"

"I fucking swear, Taehyung. If you don't shut the fuck up and let me do my job I'm going to kill you next," Jungkook whispers fiercely.

"Whatever. Just get it done."

Before Jungkook can curse him out some more, Tae hangs up, making Jungkook growl again in annoyance.

Then Jungkook turns to see you standing by the edge, looking out over the water.

He swallows the lump in his throat, Tae's voice finding it's way to his mind as it whispers, Just do it, push her off...

Quick and easy.

He walks over, his hands out and ready to get this hit over with.

He notices his hands shaking uncontrollably.

Then he decides against it and reaches into the back of his pants, pulling out a small gun.

One shot and you're done, Jungkook.

You're done.

"J-Jungkook..."

He hides the gun behind his back, but you don't even turn around. You just keep looking out at the water, your arms crossed over your chest.

"I h-hope one day, th-that you f-find what you love. I hope y-you can do wh-what you love," You turn and smile at him softly, your hair blowing in the gentle wind as you whisper, "I hope you c-can live for w-what you love."

Jungkook sucks in a breath as the image of a woman appears next to you at your words.

"Live for me and do what you love, please. Whatever happens, Jungkook, don't let them change you..."

Jungkook's lip trembles at the woman's words, the ones he could never hear before.

"Don't let them ruin you."

You watch Jungkook as he seems to have some kind of internal struggle, then he walks close to the edge and throws something as far as he can as a broken scream leaves his throat.

All you see is a small black object fall into the ocean.

When you turn to Jungkook, he's on his knees, his head hanging as he breathes shakily.

You say nothing.

After a minute, Jungkook looks up at you, and you feel your heart break at the agony in his eyes, "____," He whispers.

"Y-Yes?"

"I'm sorry."

_________________________________

a:n im back :)

278 notes · View notes

charcubed · 3 years

Note

hey char, mind to share your fave stevebucky headcanons? 👀

Oh I LOVE that you asked me this :’) Thank you!

I honestly have so many if I really think about it because I love them so much and I think about their dynamic so much that I have so many favorite things... but here is what I think of off the top of my head:

• Steve was color blind before the serum, according to canon. I have a headcanon that Bucky used to try to describe colors to him. I wrote a mini fic about that here.

• Bucky was drafted for the war, but didn’t tell Steve. Steve sort of assumed that Bucky enlisted, and Bucky never wanted to correct him. How could he? Steve wanted to enlist so badly, and Bucky didn’t ever feel like he could admit that he didn’t have the same drive to want to ~fight for the country~ like Steve did. He didn’t want to disappoint him and he was afraid Steve would think he was a coward. So Bucky just... never told him that he was forced into war. It was never his choice to fight for the country. If it was up to him, they would’ve stayed home together and stayed safe and never fought at all.

• They were always physically rough with each other, in the sense that they'd wrestle as boys all the time, and Steve loved that Bucky never treated him as fragile. Buck knew he could take it. Even after the serum, they'd still scuffle a bit like kids, finding a bright spot in a war-torn world. They’d be awake in the trenches on lookout, having soft conversations in the night, and shoving each other after one says something stupid or makes a bad joke.

• Steve is bi, and Bucky is gay. Bucky was consciously aware of his feelings for Steve way, way before Steve was aware of his for Bucky. In the 30s, Bucky has a bit of a reputation for ~dating around,~ but not in a rude ladies’ man kind of way but rather his reputation is “Bucky Barnes is a real charmer. He’ll show you a good time and he’s really sweet, but he never pushes your boundaries.” Some women wishes he’d push their boundaries, but he doesn’t. He’s taken so many women out on dates because he never lets it get super serious, since they’re not who he wants and it’s mostly for appearances’ sake, especially since he and Steve live together. He definitely enjoys hanging out with women, and treating them nice, but most of the time his motivation is to try to set up double dates–half because Steve deserves to find a great girl to date, and half because a double date means Bucky can selfishly do a date activity “with” Steve and not have it mean anything. Meanwhile though, Steve gets jealous as hell and testy about Bucky dating all the time, but he’s oblivious to the fact that it’s because Steve wishes Bucky would be with him instead.

• Their first kiss was when Steve was 16 and Bucky was 17. I’m not necessarily saying that’s when they actually got together, but something significant happened between them at those ages... maybe they kissed because they were drunk, or it was so Steve’s “first kiss” would be someone he knew and it was for “practice.” And then they both never talked about it again, because they’re idiots and were afraid to ~ruin things~ between each other. That’s why Steve says “Rumlow said ‘Bucky’ and all of a sudden I was a 16-year-old kid again, in Brooklyn.” That’s why “seventeen” is one of Bucky’s trigger words as the Winter Soldier. It checks out, because Bucky is a little bit older than Steve.

• Steve doesn’t fully admit the depth of his own feelings for Bucky to himself until he finds out Bucky’s been captured by HYDRA. And then he tears Europe apart to get him back. He’d have done that anyway, obviously, but... the prospect of losing Bucky forever is really what makes him realize how much he can’t handle that concept. Because he’s in love with him.

• After Bucky “dies,” Steve gets more reckless, and that’s part of the reason he put the plane in the ice and didn’t try to survive: he didn’t want to live in a world without Bucky in it. This is supported by canon. And so I headcanon that, after Steve finds out about the Winter Soldier, one day he abruptly realizes that he could’ve died in that plane crash and never known Bucky was alive and brainwashed and suffering. He thought Bucky was dead and he wanted to follow him, and he could’ve left Bucky even more alone in the world without knowing it. When Steve realizes how close he came to leaving Bucky behind like that, he throws up. It horrifies him to think about it.

• They each have a pair of dog tags where one says “Steve Rogers” and one says “Bucky Barnes.” They swapped one tag each, so that they’d have a matching set, because while they couldn’t list each other as “next of kin,” they wanted tangible evidence that would show other people how important they are to each other. So people would know: tell him if something happens to me.

• Their Brooklyn accents come out / get heavier around each other, especially if they’re bitching about things or arguing.

• Bucky is a complete sci-fi and fantasy nerd–which is now confirmed canon, and I love it. In particular, I like to headcanon that he loves to read paperback sci-fi novels, and discount romance novels. He unironically enjoys them, and he leaves them allllll over the place. One of the things they love to do is Bucky will sit around and read while Steve will sit around and draw/paint, and half the time Steve gets distracted sketching Bucky’s facial expression he makes while he’s reading.

• Bucky is also a pop culture gremlin. He will try and often get interested in pretty much anything and everything, without rhyme or reason. In modern day, he and Nat will watch trashy reality TV together–sometimes to make fun of it, sometimes to get invested. Steve thinks they’re insane for that. And sometimes Bucky will like one niche thing but then for very specific reasons he dislikes another similar thing. It makes sense to him, even if Steve doesn’t get it.

• Steve tends to be pickier with the kind of stuff he enjoys. He’s always had Strong Opinions™️ on everything, including and especially art. Put him in a museum and he’ll have a lot of thoughts on all of it. He doesn’t judge things or hate on other people for liking things he doesn’t like at all, but he won’t get hooked on a movie/show quite as easily. The one exception is animation, which he absolutely adores, and he goes on a wild binge of all kinds of animated content for awhile–shows and movies–because the various art styles and uses of the medium to tell crazy stories just fascinates him.

• Easy access to so much music is one of their mutual favorite things about the 21st century. Bucky often gets into individual artists’ entire discographies and becomes a fan, whereas Steve often gets into a handful of specific songs from a wide range of various people. Like... Bucky will often love an entire album, and Steve will often love 2 songs specifically more than others. But even with that, Steve loves collecting vinyl records–both old and new ones.

• Bucky has a fantastic singing voice even though he’s shy about it, and he tends to hum along to music when distracted or working on something else–especially while making something in the kitchen.

• Bucky likes technology more than Steve; Steve likes physical stuff more than Bucky. Bucky loves to take photos and videos of things all the time, hoarding digital memories in a way that’s precious to him, knowing that they’re “safe” and accessible anywhere. They lost so much of the objects that they loved a century ago, and photos were scarce, but now... there are endless ways to have pictures. When Bucky was recovering in Wakanda and Steve was on the run, Bucky would often text Steve photos–sometimes without captions–to wordlessly share bits of his days with him. He’s got a good eye for photography, except for when he takes the photo equivalent of shitposts to make Steve laugh. Regardless, Steve gets his favorites printed–some of Bucky’s photos, some of his, some of their selfies–so they also always have something tangible to hold onto.

• Bucky calls Steve “sweetheart” sometimes, just to be a little shit–and he means it. It makes Steve turn red every time, without fail, but he secretly doesn’t mind it.

Okay I’ll stop hahaha. Those are the main ones that come to mind for me all the time when I think of them!

Thank you again for asking :D This was so fun to write all in one place!

#anonymous #asks #stevebucky #stucky #steve rogers #bucky barnes #headcanons #literally sat here and spent like an hour writing this. like it's 2017 again. NO remorse! a nice way to wind down my evening #char writes things

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chocominnie · 3 years

Text

Desperado — 09 (M) | JJK

Pairing: Badboy!Jungkook X Reader

Summary : A messy situationship at it’s finest. You don’t even know whats headed your way, just even engaging in the slightest within him. See, he has an assignment to complete. A mission granted by his father thats do or die. You just so happen to be a major pawn in that assignment. He didn’t mean to take an interest in you. Surely it was an accident right? Only except. you hold much value in this game that he’ll do anything to complete it. Oblivious is what you are. Poor thing. Poor.. Poor thing.

Genre: Mature/ Mafia!Jungkook

Trailer: xxxxx preview 01 02 03 04 05 06 07 08

Word Count : 7.3k

Warnings : This honestly isn’t for the light hearted and the weak…High angst, usage of drugs, drug mentions, mental illness, switch!jungkook, Brat reader, possible stockholm syndrom, kidnapping, assault, death of side characters, murder, weapons, usage of weapons, masturbation, physical violence, blood, alcohol, weed, unprotected and protected sex, spanking, honestly its a lot of aruging…

Copyright: please do NOT repost, translate, or modify my works in any way, shape or form, on any platform. If found doing so , it is considered as plagiarism and appropriate LEGAL action will be taken

TW : Suicide, Body Hanging for display.

Her hair moves so flawlessly and the her breasts spill over the mini triangle bra with each sensual move she makes. The way her waist and body whines against the pole could leave absolutely anyone in a trance.The rhythm of the music blasts in the air and she’s directly on beat to it, not missing anything through the song playing.

The led lights are dimmed low enough in a red color, but enough for everyone to see. Shes uncaring at the men in the room sizing her up in her designer high waisted thong that hugs her hips very well, showing off her round, plump ass. That was what she wanted, the attention all on her while they throw hundred dollar bills for her.

“ Who knew someone could get down and dirty like that.”

To no suprise, Jimin, the ladies man but heartbreaker for sure, enters the private room and closing the door beind him. He throws a stack of money towards her, as he was the seemingly late one to the meet-up.

“ Jungkook is late, he’s never late. What’s taking him so long?” A grumpy Namjoon says, looking down at his apple-watch. It’s half past 10 pm and usually he’s the first one here.

“ He’s probably sucking up to yn-”

The girl turns her head sharply towards the boys, overhearing what they said. She furrows her eyebrows at them, “ Why would he be doing that..”

Taehyung lets out a small groan. “ Because Mr. Lover boy has gotten himself a crush. The worst part is, she’s his target for this mission.”

“ Shut the fuck up. I don’t have a crush on her, i’m just doing my job.” A semi-loud voice roars through the doors. Everyone stops to look at the sudden intruder and to relief it’s him, Jungkook.

Of course he has to lie about that. He knew for sure he caught himself up with you and the feelings were strong. Though the big bad mafia boy catching feelings for his target is highly uncommon, and Jungkook doesn’t know the consequences.

“ Jungkook..” The girl says, frowning at him with her hand on her hips. He takes a seat on the couch and tilts his head at her to go on. She rolls her eyes and shakes her head at the young boy. “ You fell for her.. so what about us?”

It isn’t hard to say that he doesn’t have any more feelings left for the girl. She and him both knew what they agreed upon. The pair had history together, sexual to be exact. Romance was hardly there if he were to be honest. She’d began actually working for Won-Shik, under this club they’re in now which is owned by him, a year ago. Jungkook had entered the club once when he was considered a minor, but that was to pass a message along to the girl from his father. He was told to go straight in and straight out. Of course, he did the exact opposite. Sat around looking at all the half naked women that night as the music blared loud.

It wasn’t until his phone rang and it was Casper telling him to hurry up and come back to the car, is when he finally decided to get up and look for the girl. When he did find her, it was over with for him. The girl was, and still is, stunning. One of the many foreign girls in the club but she’s the one that stood out of all. She wore nothing but a small outfit as she danced on the pole. Her beauty mesmorized Jungkook that night as he watched her dance in awe. Soon enough she came to him showing her her dimply smile and perfect teeth.

He was stunned alright. She knew he looked to be too young for the club so she asked him his age. He told her, and thats when she nearly called security on him until he told her who he was and affiliated with. The message was passed along accordingly to her, she got the memo. Jungkook though, kept coming back to that club and always going to where she was, following her around the club like a lost puppy. She enjoyed his time, as all she did was sit and talk with him and that turned out to not be enough for him. He wanted her, and she insisted that he was too young for her.

So Jungkook did what any other person would do when feeling rejected, he started to present himself like a true man and mafia boy. The gym was his favorite place after that and he buffed up very well. That jawline of his got sharper and his personality gained more confidence and dominant by the time he turned nineteen. He of course kept going at her, shooting his shot anytime he could and yet kept getting denied. It wasn’t until his nineteenth birthday is when he begged her telling her how bad he wanted her, and that lap dance he kept suggesting months before. Since it was his birthday and he was legal, she gave him what he wanted but that still wasn’t enough for him. He wanted her underneath him bad. The slight age gap between them didn’t phase Jungkook at all. What he wants, is what he gets.

And he did.

And kept getting it, and getting it, and getting it since then.

“ Relax baby, I’ll still be coming around you know that.” His voice is smooth, smirking at her. He wasn’t going to be coming around as much, but he knew that would disappoint her.

She purses her lips and begins walking towards him and sits directly on his lap, straddling him. Jungkook can’t push her off the way he wants to because it would confirm the crush rumors from the boys about you. So he lets her sit there, uncomfortable as hell for him.

Namjoon clears his throat to get the rest of the group attention. It’s nearly 11 pm and Crystal has been blowing up his phone ever since he stepped foot in the club. He told her beforehand about the meeting, but she wanted him at her apartment by at least 1 am.

“ We all know you love yn, but remember who you are Jungkook.” Namjoon says, glaring at the boy who returns the glare back at him. “ Fuck you. Like I said, im just doing my job.”

“ If you were doing your job Jungkook, there’s no way in the hell that it should take you this long. “ Jin retaliates. He knows hes right.

By this time, Jimin had finished preparing seven perfectly rolled blunts filled with the most finest imported weed. He places them onto the tray, taking his own and then passing the tray to Yoongi. Each of the boys take their own until it reaches down to Jungkook who takes his and puts the tray back onto the table.

“ Enough about her. I was summoned to go over the details for the next seven days. “ Jungkook groans, sparking his blunt and inhaling. He passes it Melanie, who takes it to inhale as well.

A malicious smile comes upon Yoongi’s face as he exhales the smoke into the already fogged up air. One thing he loves to talk about is torture. One of bangtan’s best walking torture device to be known.

“ Tonight we are starting.. I say you let me go first.” Yoongi pauses, taking a long inhale of his blunt. “ I’m coming for their trade transaction place. Arson, let me burn the bitch down and then fuck around with their father.”

It’s a good idea. Sending a message after burning it down straight to it’s opponent. Fire is Yoongi’s thing, and that’s his signature marking in the Bangtan Boys. The father of the shooter was one of their dealers, until the shooter’s father fucked up by taking money out of bangtan’s cut little by little. The boys knew about it, they waited for the perfect time back then to take action. Of course, giving them a mission to complete.. or so he thought. The mission was a false one. Created by Jungkook to catch him off guard. Jungkook used some of the mafia men on Won-Shik’s side to set up a trade off of drugs, decieving the shooter’s father by thinking they were just setting up a regular mafia trade from another gang. The trade was complete, but their protection was no more. Needless to say, the men didn’t even make it back to their cars. It was a bloodshed war between Jungkook’s assigned men and their men. The point was to send a memo that the Bangtan Boys were coming for them, and coming hard.

Everynight for two weeks unimaginable signs were sent to their family. Ranging all the way from several gunshot bullets going through their home, to severed heads of previous betrayers of the bangtan boys, sitting right on their porch. By now, all the other gangs in Korea knew not to have any business with them.

“ Day 2 I want it. I’m going for the mother. That scamming bitch and her precious flower shop? I’m shooting it up. Whoever lives, lives. Whoever dies, dies.” Jimin shrugs, smirking as he leans back in his spot.

“ Day 3, for me I’m sending another message. One of their men is gonna die in my god damn hands. I’ll be sure to take a selfie and send it to the father. The body will lay hanging on that pretty little oak tree in their yard.” Taehyung says. The boys are roar with shock that he’s said that. Normally he doesn’t like touching a dead body, so it’s a change for him.

The boys continue listing off the days and assigned tasks for the rest of the night into the wee early morning. Namjoon left after his, of course going straight to his girls apartment. They don’t judge him, seeing as though the boy really is in love and knows when and how to handle it. He definately doesn’t mix business and his love life together, unlike his other hyung. Soon enough the banter and socializing ends and it’s time for Yoongi first.

Night 1

It doesn’t take long for Yoongi to find the place. The empty steets of Seoul have soon faded into just dirt roads with the city left behind. The humming of his porsche echos through the night time air. Yoongi takes one final turn, making sure to pull into the place slowly like a true hunter keeping it’s eye on its prey. It’s not a full house tonight, even better.

Taking the jug of gasoline out his car, he carries it with ease up to the empty warehouse. The wildlife outside don’t make a noise. As if they know who’s approaching and just shut right up. Forty degrees fahrenheit outside and lastnight’s snowfall piled all around.The darkness outside is haunting, anything could pop out at any second to kill the man. That doesn’t scare him at all. Darkness is always what he crave. Inside and out.

“ Sir.. do you want us to go in with you?”

Yoongi stops dead in his tracks. He’d almost forgotten about the back-up men Jungkook ordered for him. It’s not like he needed them anyways, but since Jungkook can’t be there with Yoongi, that was the next best choice.

Rolling his eyes without turning around,“ No. Wait in your cars. I’ll handle it on my own.”

Just like that. The boys are off like lightening. Yoongi takes one final step towards the two double doors, and begins to pour the gasoline at it’s starting point. Usually, he’d go from the inside out, but seeing as though he wanted them to scurry out fearing for their lives, this is the next option as well. Soon enough, the enire jug is empty and he’s now poured all of it around the outside of the warehouse. Leaves crunch with every step he makes back to the starting point. Part of him hopes they can’t hear him from the outside. It’ll ruin the plans.

The lighter in his pocket feels so smoothe against his palms as he reaches for it. It’s one of his signature ones with his initials on it. An andrenaline rush runs through his veins as flicks the ignition with his thumb. The flame all bright and orange as he stands there infront of the building. It’s going to be a damn good night.

Without hesitating, Yoongi runs his fingers through his hair and throws the lighter right onto the gasoline puddles. The way the whole ring of fire lights up infront of his eyes makes him laugh hysterically while watching the whole building go into flames. The loud crackling sounds of the now decomposing warehouse jumps him back into reality.

He heads right towards the big tree next to the right of the warehouse, leaning on it with one foot up against it with his hands crossed. That sinister smile doesn’t leave his face. He enjoys the view of the men from the inside running out as fast as they can. Some falling in the ring of fire in the process. The fire is no match for any human as they try to stop drop and roll. Ha, as if that would work with a 15 foot fire consuming the warehouse. The dead bodies pile up on their own, just burning in the fire over their simple mistakes of falling and thinking they would survive the fire.

Until the golden egg comes out. He’s furious as runs out perfectly, as if he’s been through this, without managing to catch on fire. Yoongi chuckles, leaning off the tree. “ Kang Dong-Woo.”

Usually Yoongi would use the honorfics to people who were much older than him. In this case though, he doesn’t deserve honorifics.

“ Min Yoongi.” He says, harshness laced within his voice. Dongwoo frowns when nearing the man. He knows what Yoongi is capable of, and that’s what sets his fight for flight into action.

“ Let’s get straight to it. Your daughter is after our leader. She seems to be doing the dirty work for you yeah? Did you not train her enough? Of course you know she wont be able to live after this right?”

Dongwoo laughs right into Yoongi’s face as if he was joking. It angers Yoongi, so he grabs Dongwoo by the shirt and drags the man over to the fire where he kicks the back of his legs to where he’s kneeling inches away from it.

“ I don’t think this is a laughing matter, Dongwoo.” He growls, tightening his grip around Dongwoo’s arms that are behind his back. “ You want to die?”

“ She’s gonna fuck you all over.” He growls.” You may think she’s not capable of finishing off you guys one by one, but she is. I raised and trained her since a kid. She’s stronger with more energy than me. She’ll kill you all when you least expect it.”

Yoongi rolls his eyes at him.” The dumb bitch can’t even shoot right. Going for someone else knowing Jungkook would save them is an ameteur move. Should’ve went straight for his damn head.”

“ I’ll make sure she’ll bring you guys hell Min Yoongi. All of you. Tell that shit to Jungkook and his daddy for me alright?” He mocks, laughing again at the boy to taunt him.

Yoongi doesn’t care for it. He’s had enough of this foolish talk. With one swift move he kicks the man’s back making him fall down to the left side, away from the fire. He’s lost it. He’s totally lost it at this point and there is no going back. Kick after kick after kick, he doesn’t stop. No. Not until the Dongwoo is sure to cough up blood. The crimson liquid poors from his mouth as he lays there. No remorse is felt.

Besides, the bastard bitch needed to get the message. Consider it message recieved.

Night 2

The flower shop is full, but not full to its entirety. There's tons of different bouquets and arrangements set around the pretty shop, from what he can see from the outside. It’s almost closing time, an hour left. Jimin’s fingertips grip on the steering wheel, anxious but patient to make his move. He’s running off of pure adrenaline and 2 cans of monster that are crushed and sitting in the passenger seat. Waiting isn’t his forte and he’d honestly like to get this show on the road now.

The moon is out and shining bright tonight. A sigh escapes his lips when he glances again at the shop. The only reason he’s not done it yet is due to the fact that there is a child and his mother inside. Rule number 2 of Bangtan, injure no child. The price to pay if you were to break the rule? Simply it would cost you your own damn life.

As if time would of went any slower for the boy, the child and his mother finally made their transaction and made it out of the store, heading across the street to continue their journey of shopping. It’s go time.

He knew to come prepared with his bulletproof vest and full face ski mask, long Sleeve black shirt to cover all the markings he has and also the two tattoos on each of his arms. He knew that the little lady wouldn’t be so dumb to not carry, or at-least have someone inside that would be her undercover security. Considering who her husband is, there’s no way she won’t be protected.

Oh how innocent the people look to not know what’s coming next. Jimin loads his Glock 19 with golden bullets that have Bangtan Boys initials and symbols on it just before pulling his mask down and getting out the car. He makes sure to signal his back-up men to create a distraction so he could make his entrance. Sure enough, a loud boom in the near distance of what sounds like some type of construction falling, echos loudly. It turns heads from all around to look where the sound came from, making it easy for Jimin to slide into the flower-shop.

Not a sound made by him. He draws his gun and pulls the safety off the trigger, then cocks it. Eyes are all on him as his eyes shift around the room looking for his target. There she is, eyes wide in the middle of a transaction for two middle aged couple. His eyes set into hers, lowly smiling and pointing it at her. The way everyone frantically screams and cries out doesn’t phase Jimin, no. It just encourages him even more as he starts firing shots mid air, shooting any and every person in sight for the hell of it. Bodies drop to the ground, and the bloodbath begins.

Jimin doesn’t hesitate to step over everybody, eyes still set on his target. The middle aged couple’s shrieks were cut short by their bodies dropping to the ground with three shots each to their hearts.

“ Park J-” He cuts her crying off with a finger to his lips, daring her to say his name in public. She gets the memo. “ I wouldn’t if I were you.”

The barrel is pressed against her temple as she trembles with fear. He cocks his head to the side, smiling at her when he taps the gun against her head harshly, repeatedly. “ You know why I’m here.”

“ You kill me and she will murder you all.”

Jimin chuckles, “ That’s what you guys think. We don’t have time for your gimmicks. It was you guys who stole money from us. Why did you think you’d still be protected from the law from us? Getting your daughter to go for the leader first is dumb, like the rest of you.”

“ We almost went to prison for you guys, remember that? We needed that cut money from you guys to pay off our legal fees. Thats why we stole. We completed your dirty work while trying to pay off the fees, its the least you guys could of did as a reward.”

“ That’s not how it would’ve worked. You fucked up. All of you.”

With two shots to the leg, she falls into Jimins arms. He rolls his eyes and throws his body off of him and onto the floor. It’s going to be a headache trying to explain to the dry cleaners why there is blood stains on his designer ripped jeans.

Night 3

It was too easy, way too easy. It took nothing to lure that man right into Taehyung’s trap. Nothing but a simple few slick comments made to him for him to get a riled up at the wrong person. Taehyung had spotted the man prior heading into the park with a small duffle bag. He assumed it was for a night trade off for some other person who had delivered drugs for him. Nontheless, it was merely too easy to pose as the alleged person who completed the mission.

A rookie. That guy must’ve been a rookie.

When the money was handed off to Taehyung, he tossed it to the side and struck the man down. The two did fight on the concrete floor for a bit but the man was no match for Taehyung’s quick moves. Taehyung’s pocket knife dances around the man’s throat as his body is pinned to the ground.

“ Rookie mistake not verifying if I’m the real one.” He chuckles, pressing the blade against the mans neck. The man pleads for his life but it’s no use. Message must be sent, that it’s no way you’ll fuck around with Bangtan and escape.

“ You know, I would’ve trained you more than Dongwoo. Letting the weakest link go run an errand? Ha. Your boss set you up for that one.”

Although the man is merely innocent, it doesn’t stop Taehyung from slicing into the man’s neck. A blood curdling scream comes out, but soon hushed over as his will of breathing and screaming is cut. It’s music to Tae’s ears.

The body is transfered per request of Taehyung to his back-up men. It’s not like him to touch a bloody dead body. So they take him into the back of their car and follow Taehyung to the residential house of the shooter. Nothing more than 10 minutes away.

The lights are cut off in the neighborhood. Not a sound made other than the two cars coming down the street. Everyone seems to be at peace and quiet in their homes. Sleeping to say the least. Upon arrival, Taehyung parks his car right infront of the house. The back-up men drag the bloody body out the car and onto their lawn, placing it right under the oak tree.

Taehyung takes the rope be brought along with him, and begins to tie multiple knots around a sturdy branch from the tree. When done, he wraps some of the rope around the dead boy’s neck, tying it into a slipknot and hoists him up high into the air.

The body dangles from the tree like a flag waving in the sky proud and high. He signals for the boys that the assignment is done and that they’re free to leave. Taehyung though, he just sits back in admiration of his work. It’s been a while sinice he felt this way. So he stands there soaking it all in.

Message recieved.

Since it’s been three entire days of hell, Jungkook knew his day will be approaching faster than ever. If only it could get here faster though. Truth is, Won-Shik isn’t too happy about Jungkook’s plan still not being complete. At this point, the father is going against him any chance he gets to just get this over with.

Luckily, tonight he’d be able to meet with his father again with some good news. It hasn’t been brought to his attention yet about your father being in Taiwan. With the technology of Won-Shik’s men, your father could be brought here within 12 hours tops.

“ Father.” Jungkook says, entering his office doors. The boy fixes his leather jacket upon entering and places his hands back into his pockets. “ I have news.”

Won-Shik is one to not play around with. Interupting his office time is a big, big deal. One is to not enter without it being urgency. That rule still applies to the heir of the company. “ It better be damn good because your plan isn’t getting anywhere Jeon Jungkook.”

Won-Shik takes his glasses off and sets them to the side on his desk. Its full of papers and photos of himself and Jungkook when he was a child. His favorite one right in the middle, where Jungkook had just ate some cherry flavored ice cream and his lips were all red as he smiled for the camera showing his two front teeth. It reminded him of when Jungkook was easier to manage rather as to now where he’s a damn menace.

“ Taiwan. Her father is in Taiwan. I don’t think it’s Taipei though.. he’s hiding so a city wouldn’t be ideal. I say search the mountains first, then the city.”

Bringing this proposal to the table meant that Jungkook wanted to atleast gain his father’s trust back. Hell, he wanted all this to be over with by now because you were driving him crazy to the point where he’s beginning to actually forget who the hell he was and why he was assigned this mission. The plan was not to fall, but to complete. He’d be lying if he wasn’t knee deep in love with you right now. It all comes down to him protecting you from his father at this point.

“ So your little plan is suddenly working huh.. still doesn’t mean she gets to run free Jungkook.” He says, smirking at the boy to challange him. Jungkook knew that. Once it’s proven that your father is the snitch, all of the family dies.

You’re innocent. Too innocent to know that or to be even tangled in that mafia mess of his. Part of him wishes he never met you and never had been assigned this mission. Then everything would be so damn different and emotions wouldn’t be caught up in this. From the moment he met you, he knew it would be hard. You have always held a special part in his heart. Only because you acted just like his mother. Sweet, but sassy and it hurt him a lot on how you remind him of her. You even word your words just like her, even when upset. Everything about you, is just like her.

It was hard to not get attached to wanting to get to know you more. Somehow he thought that if he got to know you, he’d somehow fill that hole inside him of his mother’s disappearance. As if you were going to be his new replica as you would be the one to put a band-aid on that hole to patch it up.

Here you are, not knowing you could die any moment and it will all be thanks to Jeon Jungkook, who couldn’t save you fast enough.

“ I know. But she’s innocent. She doesn’t even know her dad worked with us. I swear she doesn’t.” Jungkook bites his lip in hopes that there could be someway to save you by the hands of your father.

“ I dont care!” He roars, jumping out his seat. Jungkook flinches, backing up a bit from the sudden outburst. “ You know not to mix business and pleasure. You reap what you sew. You get to pay the consequences.”

Jungkook knew that though.

“ Father-”

“ Nothing more. I’ll have my team start the search right now. You on the other hand, get you god-damn shit together Jungkook. You’re the heir, not a damn lover-boy. Got it?”

It is no use of arguing with him. Jungkook looks down at the ground and nods his head yes just before Won-Shik dismisses him. It’s going to hurt. Seeing you dead. He hopes for a miracle can happen, that your father will not be the snitch. That you and him could live happily ever after. There will no be any happily ever after about this situation though. One will die. Just a matter of who it will be.

The vibrating sensation in his pocket snaps him out of his trance. An incoming call from Namjoon. It’s alarming since today is Namjoon’s day of hell, and only one thing could be happening right now if he’s calling for Jungkook.

There’s been a mistake.

“ What is it Namjoon.”

“ She fucking outsmarted me. The bitch caught on to where my location would be for the next kill. I don’t know where the fuck she is Jungkook.. this is bad.”

Jungkook sighs heavily, closing his eyes while letting out strings of curses come from his mouth. Shit couldn’t get possibly worse than this right now. Namjoon said he’d wanted to go straight for the killer and bust her up a bit. Give her some words and a branding on her. He had wanted to do it with a knife, carving the initals of Bangtan Boys into her upper hip. Namjoon had zero problem tracking her next location down, as he had been keeping an eye on her all day. To him, it seemed as if she would be heading to an orchestra shop in the city. Every step she took, Namjoon took it too.

Until she rounded the corner to go inside the shop and she wasn’t there. There wasn’t any outlet. The shop was on a dead end street surrounded by other shops that they both had passed. There was no way she didn’t go back, he would of saw it. He saw her go into the store, so she had to be there right?

Wrong. You see she knew all this time that Namjoon was followering her while in disguise. The orchestra shop where she led him to, she knew the owner. They were good friends. She had spoken to him asking if that she could use his upstairs office to read over some of the newest edition of music pieces for her to practice. He obliged, and she made up there in time before Namjoon came inside.

Up there, she’d be lying if she wasn’t scared to death. All this week the boys had definately given her hell. Each day with zero remorse. It was taking a toll on her for sure. Taking up this assignment by herself wasn’t something easy but she wanted to prove to him that she can be just like him. That she wanted to work with him too to take down Bangtan for decieving them and leaving them in the dust.

She can’t do it. The boys are to expierenced for her. It’s a bad mistake that she cannot come back from. You see, she thought it would be easy to befriend you and become close to you after you’d laid eyes upon Jungkook your first day here. She knew you’d soon fall for him, like any other girl did, and that would be her easy acess to him from you. It was all planned beforehand. To be quiet and observe you and your moves with him. In her mind, Jungkook needed to die first. The boys can’t function all that well without him, so that would be the weak spot to take advantage of if he would’ve died when she knew he’d take the bullet for you. She coudn’t shoot him first, it’d be too straightforward and blunt.

It was going all well. Deep in the inside she was jealous of you as well. Sungmin had been her crush for years, they even almost dated. Until you came along and he left her in the dust for you. Sungmin is everything she wanted in a boy, but you took that away from her. Her chances to date him ruined by you. It hurt everyday to see him head over heels in love with you, when that was just her at one point before you came along. Not only that, but she seen the way you play with Sungmin’s emotions. It made her upset that you do that. Sungmin’s love is a drug, whether it be friendship love or romantic, nobody can get enough of it.

All this stressed her out to her max. Her family being hurt because of her, her mom unable to walk for the next few weeks is all because of her. Only cause she cannot complete this task she brought onto herself. As if being in danger because of Won-Shik and Bangtan wasn’t enough beforehand, she just made things worse all in all. There is no way out of this for her and her family. So it’s time to just accept it and say goodbye to it all and start a new life.

“ I’ll find her. You wait at the base and I’ll report back to you guys after I find her. When I do, you will come and finish your damn task Namjoon. Do you hear me?” Jungkook’s beyond pissed at this point. If it wasn’t for him, the boys would be lost as fuck without him.

He shoots Casper a text, letting him know that he is to follow him closely as he searches for her. To his luck, Casper was already outside his apartment building in his car. Not long after he pops those contacts in and changes his outfit again, he’s cruising the streets of Seoul in his midnight purple lamborghini.

The pain in his shoulder throbs with each turn he has to make with the wheel of his car. A little pain medicine would of helped beforehand, but rushing to get this shit over with was more important. This bitch definately has it coming. It’s been taking Jungkook these past few days to not just up and kill her. No that would just be too easy. Torture and marinating her to lose her shit at the last minute is something so satisfying to him.

The streets of Seoul soon end behind him and the Mappo Bridge comes into view. It had been an a whole hour searching around the areas of where she could’ve been, including where she was last seen. No sights of her at all. She’s good at this for sure. Text messages are sent back and forth between the boys and Jungkook. They’re all on edge, tired, and frustrated at this chasing game that they’re all playing.

He’d almost missed it. The body walking alongside the side-walk of the bridge with their head hanging low and hoodie on. It’s the hoodie of his school, but most importantly it has their class graduation year on it. It has to be her. Jungkook flashes his hazard lights on, letting Casper know to pull over with him.

It’s now or never.

After sending the text to Namjoon, he’s out the car and jogging towards the suspect. Height, body type, and shoes match the alleged identity. It seems she’s too into something to notice the extra footsteps behind her. He can’t do anything to her though, it’s not his night.

“ Kang Minlee.”

She stops dead in her tracks as if a ghost had called her name. Frozen, she stands there contemplating on running or staying. If she runs, she’s dead. If she stays, shes dead.

“ You think..” He pauses, grabbing her arm and turning her around to face him. Her face is red from crying and her glasses all fogged up from underneath her mask. For a split second, Jungkook does feel regret.

Killing a classmate of his wasn’t something he’d ideally let happen. But it’s far too late to not have her killed off. “ You think that running away is the best option?”

Minlee trembles underneath his grip, “ I made a mistake. Please just let me go. Let me and my family go and we’ll leave you alone forever.” She breaks down into tears, placing her hand over his in attempt to let her go.

It didn’t hurt Jungkook to see her like this. All in all it just feels weird to him. Weird to have one of his classmates begging for her life to be spared from the gruesome events to come.

“ You know I can’t do that.” It honestly can’t be an option at this point. It’d be better to just continue out her days of hell with her family. “ You came for me, that means you die.”

Finally she jerks her arm back from his still in tears as she starts to back away slowly. Jungkook knew that she wouldn’t run. Not in this case. Letting her cry it out was the best way, hell it’s the only way because Namjoon would be here any minute to brand her. It would mean she belonged to Bangtan after that, and she’d have to keep quiet as they planned out her death.

Her sudden movement from the ground to climbing up the railing of the bridge alarms Jungkook. She cries louder when Jungkook comes closer to getting her down so he stops. Suicide? Right now? What happened to being all big and bold? It confuses Jungkook as to why she would take her own life right now. Either way she’d still end up dead and unhappy if Bangtan would kill her or she’d kill herself.

“ Jungkook!” She semi-yells, pointing to the direction behind him as another guy approaches them. Just in time, the sound of Namjoon’s car can be heard from afar. He’s getting close.

The guy she’s pointed to is Casper, who’s also alarmed at the fact that she’s close to the edge right now. Jungkook holds his hand up at Casper for him to stop right there and shakes his head, meaning that it’s too risky for Casper to step in right now. Casper nods and Jungkooks turns back to the scene.

“ Don’t you think that I’ve suffered enough? Everyday you guys give me hell. My mom can’t walk because of you guys, and my dad has health issues. You left us in the dust when we needed your support the most! I was almost put up for adoption a year ago because of you!” She sobs, wiping her never ending tears with her hoodie sleeves.

Jungkook doesn’t know what to say, or do. It’s not like him to have sympathy over a rival. It’s just not in him at this very moment.

Minlee continues on, “ Yn? She took what’s mine. My Sungmin. She plays with his heart and it hurts him a lot. I wouldn’t have did that. But no, he’s head over heels in love with him. I got left in the dust when she came along and it looks like everyone loves her, including you Jungkook. My friendgroup does anything and everything she wants because she’s just oh so little miss perfect. That was supposed to be me!”

There it is. The jealousy. Jungkook would have never known it. It’s all news and shock to him. Sungmin and Minlee? Didn’t seem like a match to begin with.

Her dramatic meltdown continues on, but Jungkook allows it. Namjoon will be here any minute to sneakily get her down. Where is he and why the hell is he taking so long?

As if on cue, Namjoon pulls up to the scene and immediately gets out his car running towards the girl. Jungkook waves his hands for him to stop, eyes wide with a finger to his lips. The last thing he wanted was for the girl to jump. A death from their school? Surely was to be put on him and his boys.

Namjoon stops infront of Jungkook’s car, confused as to what’s going on. Jungkook mouthes to him the words suicide attempt. That’s when Namjoon gets it and decides to let him handle getting her down.

“ Yeah it was meant to be you. But I plan to take Yn away anyways. Then you and Sungmin could come together again.” Jungkook’s convincing isn’t convincing enough, she doesn’t buy it at all.

“ If I get down I’m going to die. There is no escaping that within the next few days i’d be dead in your hands. I made a mistake and there is no going back. Spare my parents. Let them live. I’m the one that started this. I’ll be the one to finish it.”

The girl lifts one foot off the railing and leans backwards. Jungkook’s breath hitches along with Namjoons. No. It wasn’t supposed to end like this.

“ Kang Minlee!” They both scream, running towards her. It’s too late though. Her body falls gracefully down as all three of them watch over the railing. She looks peaceful, a smile on her face while her body is sprawled out in the air.

Inches before she hits the water, the three of the boys look away with only the sound of dense water splashing to fill their ears. Namjoon sighs, putting his hands against his head. Jungkook stands there in complete shock. Casper, well Casper just shakes his head knowing the two boys weren’t prepared for that.

“ We fucked up Jungkook.”

“ I fucking know that Namjoon.” His voice cracks. It isn’t like Jungkook to cry. No not at all. Especially for a target like that. At the end of the day she was human and she did what any daughter would do for her family.

She was also your friend.

You hadn’t heard about her death yet the next day. It’s a normal saturday morning for you. This time you’d decided to go to the cafe with your laptop and write your essay for your Psychology class. The cafe is nice, it’s cat themed and has some pretty kittens running around the outside of the kitchen and customer service area.

As soon as you order and sit down with your Caramel frappe you spot a white kitten laying near you on the floor. A smile comes upon your face when it comes to you when you call for it. They don’t have these in Canada. Cat Cafes. The kitten lets out his purrs when you rub his back as he lays across your lap. The nametag says Mochi, a cute name for a cute kitten.

Minutes seem to pass by without your knowledge. You’d been too into typing to hear the news on the tv being broadcasted live. It wasn’t until you heard suicide of a teenage student on Mappo Bridge. That got your attention.

You listen carefully as the news reporter goes into detail of how the body was found. It had gotten caught on a rock as the stream moved it around. A mother had found it with her kid as they walked across the bridge that early morning to look at beautiful water. It saddens you to know someone took their life. Maybe if that person had access to getting help, they’d live to see many more days.

When they announce the name and show a school picture of the student, the look on your face drops.

Minlee. It’s Minlee on the screen. Its all too much for you right now. Your stomach twists and turns along with your hands that begin fidgeting. She seemed so healthy and happy these past few days when you saw her. It didn’t add up. It wasn’t going to ever add up to you that you had just lost one of your new friends.

Packing your things up in a hurry, your phone begins to go off with a bunch of text messages at a time. You know it could be the groupchat. What you wanted to the most right now, is to go home to cry and calm down. You shove everything in your backpack and place the kitten back on the floor nicely before taking off towards the door. You bump into somebody on the way out, causing them to drop a picture in their hand. The two of you both reach to pick it up, but they pick it up first before you.

“ I’m sorr-”

You’ve seen her before. Long curled hair, big dimple on her left cheek, and bangs.

There’s no fucking way.

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anolyso · 3 years

Text

Utena thoughts...about 2 weeks later

I've been putting it off for way too long and so most of my thoughts stopped being fresh. On top of watching way too many analysis vids post-watch, but still I do at least want to put my 2cents of Revolutionary Girl Utena out there for the world.

Utena is perhaps one of the most famous "magical girl"/shoujo action shows out there for not only it's transgressive themes of relationship abuse and low-key pretty much being the poster girl for like actual feminist perspective on/in anime...but also just doing it all in both a heavily allegorical and understated, yet super over-the-top stylish fashion

But that's it's reputation preceding itself, is Utena worth while all these years? The answer is Yes, but it also really shows it's age and budget in pacing and repetition, tho as an appreciator for "behind the scenes" compromises in art, it's more showcasing Ikuhara's talent in working around both taboo and long-form budget constraints with just well-thought out and iconic imagery that - while episodic and formulaic - is just very good at filling the 39 eps with feasts for the eyes.

Utena broadly is about tomboy Utena with memories long ago after her parents died being "saved" by a princely figure like a princess...except she's so enthralled by the nostalgia that instead she becomes a full on Prince herself and receives a dueling ring to fight in the Ohtori Acadamy secret duels for "engagement" to Rose Bride Himemiya Anthy.

Utena is divided between 4 arcs, only the first and last being Manga adapted from hearsay:

1: Student Council Saga

2: Black Rose Saga

3: Akio Ohtori Saga

4: Apocalypse

From back to forth I'd say that Akio + Apoc is more just escalation into the finale while Black Rose being anime original comes off as a glorified side-character study which while complementing the secondary cast, feels like one of those Anime movies that has to say "but if you don't watch this part, it's pretty much optional for the main plot" despite it also actually introducing the most important antagonist within it's margins.

More importantly, it's the Student Council (arc and the actual people) that lay the foundation but also a large part of the show's focus which ironically puts Utena in the background until like almost the finale and some in-between developments, so it's less "Utena (and Anthy Himemiya)'s story" until the very end, but more like a showcase of how fucked up the system at large is (pin in that).

By the Council themselves is:

Kyouichi Saionji: The biggest jobber, like actually introduced as the most despicable loser ep 1 and proceeds to be a complete arrogant joke for the rest of the show. Honestly in another shojo "love" story, they'd find some way to redeem him but semi-compellingly they turn him into like an Aqua-lad type pathetic brat with an inferiority complex to the actual Student head

Miki Kaoru: the naive "nice, non-threatening soft boy" that also just never actually listens to the girls around him. Probably adds more complexity to the whole patriarchal idea on analytic reflection since yeah, the whole "nice guy finishes last" plays up better when the kid comes off as that "ally" energy of wanting to save Himemiya from being the Rose Bride but also low-key won't actually not just do the duels and win her cuz he's that sorta wishy-washy hypocrite. Arguably the least hateable guy in the cast (minus mascot Chu-Chu)

Juri Arisugawa: TRAGIC LESBIAN TRIANGLE LOVE. Probably the biggest point to of both "not-explicitly homosexual" but also really freaking obvious since her entire story is her girlfriend stealing her "boy crush" when actually she was crushing on her and being pretty much frustrated throughout her story as pining most of it. It's quaint by today's standards but also like damn girl, get over her she was like the worst back stabbing bitch (literally if Black Rose counts)

Nanami Kiryuu: SPEAKING OF QUEEN BITCH, it's been a long time since I've watched a High School girl bully and honestly it's kinda refreshing. If Miki is "soft-boy uwu" Nanami is a brat that gets her come-uppance often, featured prominently as an anime only with the MOST filler/comedic episodes but also not low-key, being the most out-spoken actual brother complex ironically spins perhaps the biggest twist and ironic relationships of "I love my brother but not-like-that but also like-that" by the end. Mostly comedic relief but I find her inclusion to actually add a lot more to juxtapose...

Touga Kiryuu: Big Student Council Prez himself, the first arc antagonist and also a strong foil to Saionji and later a stepping stone for Akio. Touga is THE image of a Princely Playboy Heart-Throb that in any other Shoujo romance would have the main girl win him over from all those "other girls" despite him being apathetic if not outright manipulative of them. Good thing Utena is better than that and really puts a spotlight on just not-actually-ok his power hunger for "the power to bring the world revolution" that leads him to heavily objectify Anthy, arguably even more than Misogynist Trophy Girlfriend beater Saionji, since he doesn't even see her as more than a means to an end despite professing and looking the Prince part but lacking all the actual virtues.

The Student council matters more since they're characters and subsequent tragic flaws are the ACTUAL meat of the show and on second rumination actual shows more how fucked up the system/gender dynamic/power hierarchy is since - while it blatantly fucks over Juri who can't just outright say who she likes - also show almost it's own sub-text of Masculine failings: Saionji desperately clinging to being TOXIC MASCULINE™ and completely falling short underneath Touga; Miki's "nice boy" act belying him trying to replace his low-key nostalgia for his sister (also a bitch, but apparently was more like Nanami in the manga); and best yet Touga being the quintessential "Prince in all but actual behavior" by emulating a cutthroat and Machiavellian world view but coming up empty because well, he's just an illusion of a prince...but that leads in way more to the big finale piece where I'll reintroduce the actual story's main trio

Utena Tenjou: Tomboy Prince with brain empty except for lesbian thoughts. Honestly probably what every western "STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN" archetype wishes they were since while having very tomboyish personality in athletics, blunt speaking and also VERY oblivious to the actual plot for REAL DRAMATIC IRONY, but also never actually demeaning her being feminine partially due to her love of an childhood prince and how she maintains her relationship with both her friend Wakaba and later Anthy. Honestly mostly a plot device after S1 until she gets ACTUAL development by the very end and instead kinda bumbles her way into undoing the entire REVOLUTION OF THE WORLD. I kinda wish she felt either more cognizant or at least felt like she was developing/properly rebuking the rest of the cast's power obsessions but I guess that's for the movie.

Anthy Himemiya: Actual Trophy Wife with a dark secret (darker than ski- wait no that's terrible scratch that). Set-up very much as an immediate princess in distress while also being the most femme Yamato Nadeshiko, Anthy being the Rose Bride as a literal prize who acts and behaves as whom she's "engaged" with desires while otherwise being quiet, wry, mysterious and noticably submissive, by the end it actually plays up into THE BIG REVEALS of just how abused she's been into a hopeless acceptance...like y'know actual abuse victims.

Akio Ohtori: Grade A Antagonist, probably the most insidious I've seen a villain in a while, Akio is notable for, back in 1997, being perhaps the big go-to of actual deconstructing the facade of a whole shoujo genre's "hots for a teacher/sexy man putting the moves" and highlighting how actually exploitative and abusive a person like that really is. Being Himemiya's brother (somewhat justified in the manga by both being a weird Sailor Moon-esque reincarnation of gods/godesses of Dios), despite how much of his motives are runing the background and how the entire back story is uh...brought up in like barely in the last arc with little lead up (some scenes feel like they'd be a full melodrama season and they just have like 1 scene in the final arc episodes) he manages to one-up Touga (in the plot as well) by instead of "just" objectifying girls, not-just-flat out saying Utena looks best as a princess, but y'know the fact that he is implicitly yet constantly exploiting and victim-blaming Anthy for her own suffering for "the power of Dios/Revolution of the world" turns it on its head

I've spent all this time on characters but in truth a lot of the meat of the show relies again on the Council Members fleshing out the issues of system leading to outright divorcing "being a Prince" (heroic altruistic virtues) and "being a man" (considering like all but maybe the comedic relief have some deliberately misogynistic behavior) and beyond just the plot (or rather character) synopsis, the talent goes far more in how it's framed, the symbolic/allegorical shots, the repetition adding a good episode formula flow to character showcases, probably the most "tasteful" allusion to uh...*ahem* sexual abuse that so many other edgier/prentious shows fumble. Both in how intimidating yet understated it's foreshadowing is until they hard-reveal it despite never explicitly naming it even tho it sends Nanami into hysterics

Really it's both a massive blessing and reason for it's cult beloved status for it's aesthetics but also it's burden, for being a full 39 episodic season by season character development study of everyone BUT the main trio except for snippets and the very end that makes it greatly appreciable as a legitimate work of art.

What I wanted more to say however (long overdue) is that a large part of following is, visibly at least, western feminist critiques and yes while it almost seems like Utena fits the "deconstructing patriarchy" story like a glove...it's weird how almost none of them actually can give a good historical account of actual Japanese female/gender/sexuality norms nor Anime contemporaries actually were. Like Tenchi Muyo and Berserk came out the same year (Cardcaptor Sakura the next) and despite how you can "feel" the influence in lots of modern shows like SHAFT's signature visual imagery cuts or many WESETERN shows having straight scene references to Utena....almost no one has a similar feel to Utena until like Princess Tutu comes out.

Really tho probably should've watched Utena and then Tutu because while it's undeniable that Utena is a major pillar of shoujo re-codification - what with everyone before Utena was saying they thought it'd be like a Rose of Versaille or Lady Knight rip-off...whose laughing now? - it's almost like there's a missing link between it and it's major western fanbase (probably with what few anime did get overseas, this one probably rose to the top), or how very noticeable there IS an influence on it's genre in Japan

Almost none of the big analyst fans actually know A) it's not "a deconstruction of Magical Girls" since despite Ikuhara working on Sailor Moon just before this, almost none of the tropes line up and instead more with Shoujo genre as a whole. or one of the major inspirations was Takarazuka theater.

And this is not to dismiss how inspirational it is to it's western fandom, but while I am notably cynical towards placing things on pedestals, there's probably something about cultivating the whole pop-culture feminist reading commune with people making weird time-loop theories while kinda most of it is just filling in a mad-lib mostly thanks to Ikuhara just keeping things on the vague and letting the audience take away their own perspective.

Again, most of the show is completely sub-textual or visually/symbolically depicted and never stated nor properly defines it's weird key words (End of the World, Revolutionize the World, Power of Dios, Rose Bride, all things said constantly but never really said what they "mean". But that's also perhaps its charm, in it's allegory and very Death of the Author approach, it has definitely allowed it's fan theorizing and appreciation to flourish so there's something there for that.

Ultimately I'd say Utena the TV series is great more so for what it isn't...or rather I should say it's great for not just subverting Shoujo tropes and archetypes for the Japanese audience but also that despite dealing with some very serious and heavy subjects in obtuse and perhaps understated ways for the time, people have allowed it to be put on it's pedestal because they can easily fit it in themselves.

Honestly though, not that a more "straight forward" approach wouldn't detract from Utena but I will say that the movie, Adolescence of Utena, is very much the best encapsulation of what Utena strives to be (for another big blog post) and while the TV series has plenty of time and flexes it's directorial muscles with budget constraints and season pacing UNrestrained, the movie will trim a lot of the fat

#long post #Revolutionary Girl Utena #I haven't actually done my Anime thoughts in a while #Maybe I'll keep this on my main blog this time #I wrote this mostly on facebook tho if I wrote it here first I'd better integrate images probably #anolyso's media time #uh...except now that's on my main blog

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