#then because she had a panic attack (she still doesn't call them that) | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

inkskinned · 1 month

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you found out today that a phrase you have used before was coined by an abusive man. this felt like getting your teeth taken out. it made you sick and sad and tired, but not surprised.

bad people tell you to be careful when you talk badly of bad men, that it could "ruin" a life. you had your life ruined by a bad man, not that it ever matters to them. your real life having real consequences is not valued as highly as the potential of his future.

this has always been a frustrating little mathematics problem for you. you've missed school and had to call out sick at work and had panic attacks that lasted for weeks. it stole sleep and food and friends from you. you cried in public, fucked your relationships up. and the whole time: your present has never mattered so much as the great what if! of his future. like - one life (your life) is already ruined, should we really ruin two?

so you live with the consequences and he doesn't, and that's just like, something you need therapy for. you once discussed this with one of your friends over coffee. she chewed the wooden stirrer, looked off into the distance. "once i became a victim, everything that happens to me afterward is automatically less interesting in the eyes of the general public. it is always about him. he changed my identity. to survivor. to statistic. meanwhile this whole time - i am a person."

you learned in college that three out of five of your favorite artists and authors were actually abusive assholes. these days, you are no longer surprised. oh, is that what was happening behind closed doors? of course it was, he was a "genius," and she was just a girl. you are talking about him in art history, so obviously his career was absolutely ruined, for eternity. that's what happens, right? they strike your name from the record and refuse to remember you? nobody really knows her name, but hey. that's what you get for being close to celebrity.

you got into an argument about it, which was a bad argument, because it made you cry. he said what, you want us to just ignore all the things this man did because he made a few women uncomfortable? and you'd balled your fists up and choked on it. later, in bed, you agonized over the response you'd been trying to articulate but never found the right moment to deploy: you are ignoring what any person could do if they weren't being fucking abused. maybe her talents far exceeded his and she was just never allowed to fucking use them. maybe we only see genius in white men because they purposefully fucking squash and silence any other people with talent.

but you'd cried about it instead of saying that, because you are the cost. you are the talent and potential that he took. you used to be brave and smart and clever and unafraid. like a lich, he stole years of your life.

quiet on set made you sad and sick and tired, but not surprised. unfortunately, one of the things he said was true: an entire network of people allowed it to continue. this is not news to you, because you have seen entire networks of people make the same fucking excuses when the same thing or-worse happened to you. and your particular story isn't even in hollywood. it was just a guy. it was still difficult getting people to stand up for you.

you and your friend wait in line for your coffee. like a standup joke, one man turns to the other and says "can't wait for every bitch to come crawling out of the woodwork complaining about harassment. it's another metoo." and you think - oh, that's the network. your boss tucks her hair back and whispers that while your skirt is cute, you're giving the boys the wrong idea. that's the network. when you'd told your "friend" about what happened, she'd said oh you must have misunderstood, that would never happen. and that's the network.

you woke up this morning panting, because years later you still have panic attacks. oh, it's not a network, actually, it's a web. and you, little moth: are you still surprised you're caught in it?

#warm up #spilled ink #writeblr

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solarmorrigan · 5 months

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Steve Harrington is absolutely the sort of person to become emotionally dependent on a pet. He grew up lonely and he loves taking care of things, and here's this creature that loves him unconditionally and is dependent on him for care? He's a goner

He finds a kitten in his backyard, wet and cold and alone, but in pretty good shape, all things considered. It hisses and swipes at him, but it's also mewing pathetically, and Steve can't just leave it, so he manages to get the thing inside with minimal blood loss (all his) and cleans it up and feeds it. It's a lot more amenable to the idea of Steve once it's warm and dry and full, and by the end of the day, it's curled up and purring in the crook of his neck, and Steve is already prepared to die for this thing

He does recognize that the right thing to do is to ask around and see if anyone is missing a kitten, which he does do, but no one on his street or the next one over lays claim to it, and there aren’t any kind of wanted posters going up for it, so Steve decides he is now the proud owner of a cat

He names her Baby and dotes on her accordingly. (In his defense, the name is Robin's idea; she tells him that he treats the cat enough like a baby, so the name might as well fit. Steve's always been shit at coming up with names, so he just goes with it)

Baby is the world's most spoiled cat, which Steve readily admits. But isn't that what cats are for? She's a wonderful cat and she clearly deserves nice things and Steve is going to get them for her. Toys, treats, a plush cat bed, the best food, whatever he thinks she could possibly need or want. If "I work hard so my cat can live a better life" t-shirts had existed in the 80s, Robin probably would have gotten one for him and he probably would have worn it

Of course, it helps that Baby actually does adore Steve. With everyone else, she ranges from frosty to outright hostile (she's taken a particular dislike to Eddie, of all people, which is unfortunate, because Steve really, really likes Eddie); she'll consent to be admired, and she'll accept treats, and she might even let more familiar people pet her, but in the end she is very much Steve's baby. If he's home, she's stuck to his side like a burr, curled up wherever he is and purring away, content just to be with him. She still snuggles up in the crook of his shoulder at night, just like when she was a kitten, even though she's bigger now and is a bit less easily accommodated

It goes without saying that Baby is strictly an indoor cat. Steve lives right up against the woods and there are predators out there, and people in town drive like assholes, and Steve won't take the chance of her being eaten or run over or meeting some other horrible fate. He really doesn't think his heart could take it

But of course, because all cats are terrible bastards at heart (affectionate), Baby darts out the back door one day as Steve is coming in off the patio, chasing after some other small animal that Steve can't even see, and she's out of the backyard and up towards the trees before Steve can do much more than make a grab for her

And Steve, who has survived interrogations and monster attacks and many situations objectively much more stressful than this, does not panic. He does spend half the night wandering around in the trees with a flashlight, shaking a bag of cat food and calling for Baby, but that's not panicking, that's problem solving

He eventually gets too cold and too tired to keep going and has to pack it in for the night. He holds onto some shred of hope that she'll be waiting by the back door when he wakes up, wondering why the hell it's taken so long for him to come let her in, but apparently that's not the way life works, because the patio and all areas around the house are still distinctly catless come daybreak

Eddie shows up sometime mid-morning, just as Steve is preparing to head back out and look for her. He has genuinely never seen Steve so upset; he looks like he might actually cry if he doesn't find that damn cat, which just isn't something that Steve does. But he's actually fucking distraught, and Eddie simply can't have that, even if Baby is his nemesis, so he goes to the phone and makes some calls

He cashes in on favors, he makes promises, he actually agrees to pay Mike ten bucks to show up, but he gets the kids, all the older teens (the only reason Robin hadn't been there already is because Steve hadn't paused long enough to tell her what was going on), and even the Corroded Coffin boys up to Steve's house to comb the woods for Steve's damn cat

It's Eddie who finds her in the end, a shock of pale, mewling fur actually stuck in a fucking tree. The cliche nearly kills him – either that or trying to climb down a tree one-handed while holding a cat. He's surprised she actually lets him pick her up, but then again, she's been out here all night, she's cold, and at least she recognizes Eddie. Maybe this is the beginning of a truce

Or, she might go back to hissing and swiping at Eddie any time she the mood takes her, but Eddie doesn't even care, because Steve is elated to have Baby back, so fucking happy that he doesn't even seem to notice that she's digging her claws into his arm as she clings to him for dear life all the way back to the house. Eddie will deal with anything that Steve loves that much

Steve pays for pizza to thank everyone for putting their Saturday on hold to search-and-rescue a cat, and everyone warms up and eats their fill before slowly filtering back out of the house. And later, after Baby's been cleaned up and fed and properly doted on and is purring away curled up over a heating vent in the living room, Steve takes Eddie upstairs to show his thanks in a much more thorough manner

After all – Baby is very important to him, and he's more relieved than he can say to have her back, but she isn't the only thing that Steve adores

#steddie #steve harrington #eddie munson #stranger things #eddiesteve #while I'm sure steve would love a dog too I just really see him as a cat person #he wants to spoil the shit out of something and that's what cats are made for #meanwhile Eddie is losing his mind because cats love him normally. they LOVE him! what is wrong with Steve's cat!#(she does not like sharing steve. that's it that's the reason)#solar wrote

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friendlyneighborhoods-spiderman · 1 year

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The forgotten child

Pairing's : fem! reader x peter parker, tony stark daughter! x tony stark, tony stark daughter! x peter parker

Warnings: really sad angst, jealousy, daddy issues, neglect, lmk if i missed anything! :)

Summary: dad of the year award? surely isn't going too him

a/n : I know the gif doesn't really match the theme of this story I just really liked it. I did not reread this so please ignore any grammar mistakes. Also, I'm not sure if i wrote a panic attack correctly but I wrote based on what their like for me. hope you all enjoy!

you really tried not to become the forgotten child, always tried you're very hardest to live up to your father expectations, trying to make him proud in hope's he'd show some form of attention.

always studying to get straight a's even through countless anxiety attacks from fear of failing and disappointing your father.

all you ever wanted was reassurance, and if you ever got lucky enough a "You did a good job" after getting a high score on a test.

but it never came, it would forever be something you longed to hear. he would usually just mumble a small, quiet "congrats" as his mind stayed focused on his work and his eyes stuck to the blueprint laid out on the table Infront of him.

you always tried you're best not to feel jealous whenever your father held morgan, you had no ressentiment towards morgan whatsoever, in fact she was the one that kept you smiling most days. although you couldn't help but feel your heart tighten from jealousy as you watched them have daddy daughter time

you really did try you're best to be happy for your younger sister, but you couldn't ignore that aching feeling. all you wanted was the attention she had that your heart ached so desperately for, but it never came despite your countless attempts.

you we're astound to hear a new avenger had been recruited, you always enjoyed meeting new people. mainly because they gave you attention they didn't even know you craved.

you always seeked to see the best in people, no matter what the circumstances we're. including peter parker, there was nothing wrong with him, he wasn't a bad person in fact quite a good one, and if you weren't so envious of him you possibly could have been friends with the boy. but you watched how peter and your father clicked so easily becoming like father and son.

it made the knots in your stomach tighten as you watched them spend time together, it made you feel as if something was wrong with you, like maybe if you tried harder or changed, he'd give you the attention you deserved.

your mother, pepper always said he loved you just as much as he loved morgan or even peter, but you knew the truth as much as you ignored it you knew. but oh, how you wish he did.

"Mom, I'm home" you called out knowing if father was home, he wouldn't answer you. after not receiving an answer, you decided to look through the house in search of your mother, after a couple of minutes searching you still hadn't found her and decided she probably went out and took morgan with her. you heard talking but it sounded like your father, and peter?? "what's peter doing here?" you wondered. you decided to peak you're head through the door and saw peter and tony standing with their backs faced away from you, working on some upgrades for peter's suit.

"you're a pretty great kid peter" tony told him as he smiled at him patting his shoulder. a wave of jealously hit your chest as you watched them, your throat tightening. "Thank you, Mr. stark," peter smiled cheekily as your fingers clenched into a fist at your side.

"Becoming like my son."

once those words left Tony's lips, your mouth went dry, your head aching as you backed away from the door as quietly as possible, you're breathing picking up rapidly. you quickly made your way to your room, tears forming in your eyes, you walked into your room and shut the door softly as your hands started shaking as you paced around your room quickly, trying to stop the tears from rolling down your cheeks. you never liked crying, it made you feel weak.

you're breathing came out in heavy gasp as you struggled to breathe. you leaned against the wall coughing as you squeezed your eyes shut as you tried to stop the words from replaying in your mind.

"Becoming like my son" continuously echoed through your head as soft sobs left your lips, you didn't want to feel this way, envious of what your father and peter had. it's not peter's fault about what your father feels about you so why hold him accountable. he'll never love you, at least not like he loves peter. you can't figure out why? you always tried you're best to impress him, but nothing seemed to be enough for him, it's like he didn't even care about your existence.

you stumbled over to your bed, taking deep breathes as your body grew exhausted from crying. you plopped down on your bed tiredly as you snuggled up against your blanket that was where your pillows we're supposed to be, you grabbed a pillow and hugged it too sleep.

you didn't want to put the blame on peter because it wasn't his fault, but a little piece of your heart blamed peter parker.

a/n: CLIFFHANGER!?!? I decided to leave it for now because I haven't come up with an ending that I thought fit the way I wanted so if you guys have ideas, please let me know. reblog's are highly appreciated, thank you for reading and I hope you enjoyed!

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verstappen-cult · 1 month

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HOW YOU GET THE GIRL | CL16

— 05. THE END

PREV. PART — [ SERIES MASTERLIST ]

summary: in which charles has an embarrassing crush on alex's childhood best friend and everyone meddles. content warnings: faceclaim is taylor hill but you can picture her as you’d like!

INSTAGRAM STORIES

INSTAGRAM POST

Liked by charles_leclerc, arthur_leclerc and 567,954 others

yourusername 🥂🌅🍋⛱️

view all 8,763 comments

user48 she's so hot i don't know if i wanna be her

zendaya prettiest girl in the world.

user49 is she with charles??

user50 her life doesn't revolve around charles.

user51 im pretty sure she's with charles.

user52 i actually saw a picture going around tw of her and charles like a day ago? so maybe they're spending summer break together user53 a fan ran into charles today in monaco so i don't think they're tgt

francisa.cgomes whoever told you to buy that bikini has excellent taste

yourusername i might kiss that person pierregasly HEY! that's my girlfriend you know. yourusername she wants ME

user54 what is charles doing in the likes

user55 yk sometime people like other people posts. user56 and they're dating so it's pretty normal user54 some people still act surprised lol

alex_albon you look pretty good (i was forced to comment) ((i'm held at gunpoint))

user57 she could be a model

user58 but she chose to follow charles like a dog user59 what is wrong with you people? you hate her just because she's dating your favorite driver. pathetic. user60 and she IS a model btw

INSTAGRAM STORIES

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Liked by landonorris, georgerussell63 and 768,998 others

oscarpiastri We had to leave the others behind. Sacrificies were made.

tagged: danielricciardo, yourusername.

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landonorris WHY DIDN'T YOU TAKE ME?

user61 wait. are they spending summer break together?

user62 girl have you been living under a rock? everyone's spending summer break with everyone. go check twitter.

lilymhe bring me ice cream :(

user63 im having a panic attack

user64 i may never recover

user65 THE 813 WE NEVER KNEW WE NEEDED

charles_leclerc where did you take my girlfriend?

danielricciardo pay us or you'll never see her again. oscarpiastri We'll throw her into the ocean. yourusername WHAT THE F

user66 OMG MY TWO WORLDS COLLIDING

georgerussell63 We're going to leave without you.

carmenmundt No, we are not. georgerussell63 Yes, ma'am 🫡

user67 I CAN'T BELIEVE THEY'RE ALL TGT I'M GOING TO CRY

user68 no one was ready for this

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Liked by yourusername, arthur_leclerc and 9,872 others

charles_leclerc 🌊🗺️🤚🥥

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yourusername who's that handsome boy. 👀

user69 summer break is looking good

user70 screaming crying throwing up i can't do this anymore

maxverstappen1 No pic credits? I put my life in danger for you.

user71 Y/N'S COMMENT OMG

user72 my parents

user73 i want him so bad

user74 i need them to confirm their relationship

user75 i mean it's confirmed they're dating, charles called her his gf in oscar's most recent post user76 WHAT user75 idk why people need them to 'confirm' they just don't want to user76 she's been receiving sm hate online i understand if they wanna keep it a little more private

user78 STAY CALM EVERYBODY STAY CALM

user79 one chance thats all i ask

arthur_leclerc thanks for (not) inviting me

charles_leclerc adults only 🤪 pierregasly i told him to invite you charles_leclerc no you didn't stfu

user80 I FEEL BLESSED

TWITTER

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Liked by yourusername, arthur_leclerc and 9,872 others

charles_leclerc As Taylor Swift once said... love you to the moon and to saturn.

tagged: yourusername.

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user81 I CAN'T TAKE THIS SHIT ITS TOO EARLY

user82 i'm sleeping on the highway tonight

yourusername as taylor swift once said... you are the best thing that's ever been mine. 🖤

charles_leclerc should we kiss now? yourusername i see you making eyes at me from across the room. landonorris there are children on this app

alex_albon fucking finally!

yourusername stfu

user83 MY PARENTS

pierregasly you can finally stop whining. 🙄

user84 THIS IS TOO CUTE

user85 oh my god they finally confirmed it

maxverstappen1 It was all thanks to me, you're welcome.

alex_albon it was thanks to me?? what are you on about maxverstappen1 If I hadn't threaten to punch him, he wouldn't have made things right. alex_albon I introduced them! yourusername no you didn't, you abandoned me and that's how i met charlie. alex_albon SEE?! THANKS TO ME

user86 con 😭 gra 😭 tu 😭 lations 😭

oscarpiastri Can you adopt me now?

olliebearman get in line landonorris i'm their first born child gtfo

georgerussell63 So happy for you! Can you get out of the room now, we want to eat.

danielricciardo they aren't getting out of that room😏

user87 AND WITH TAYLOR SWIFT'S LYRICS

user88 when is it my turn????

TAGLIST (bold means i couldn’t tag you) — @leclerc16s. @willowpains. @berrnuu. @minkyungseokie. @1655clean. @sassyheroneckgiant. @nessacarty1. @a1leexxa. @storminacloud. @lovstappen. @littlehoneyfreak. @paintedbypoetry. @miakat9. @scott-mccall-could-lift-mjolnir. @thatoneembarrasingmoment. @lyrasconstellation. @rhythmstars. @c-losur3. @apolloxxivmin. @janeholt3. @lovrsm. @gulphulp. @thecubanator2. @dark-night-sky-99. @ssprayberrythings.

note: oh my god, i'm so sorry it took me this long to finish this but here you have the final chapter. i'm not good with series but i did my best. hope you liked it!🤍

#꒰꒰ 📁 ─ verstappen cult files ꒱꒱#f1 x reader #charles leclerc x reader #charles leclerc fluff #f1 imagine #f1 grid x reader #charles leclerc x you #f1 smau

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thatfreshi · 8 months

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Could I request an Astarion/GN!reader(Tav) where reader has trauma around their throat being touched and stuff but bears through the panic attacks just so Astarion can feed and Astarion only finds out after they make camp and confronts reader/Tav about their mental breakdown after a battle they had prior in the day?(reader got grabbed forcefully by the neck?) Essentially a bit of angst and comfort?

Set in act 2!!

TW - choking, panic attack, disordered eating behaviors

Recommended Song: Don't Invest In Me - Adam Melchor

Battle is horrifying, something Astarion never truly quite realized until he fell in love you with. He's talented, especially at killing people. He's never had to worry in a fight, because it was always just him. Now he has to worry about you, and it's painful, not being able to be by your side constantly, watching you in perilous situations, looking death right in the eye. When your group ran into a few violent adventurers yesterday, you weren't expecting any trouble. Suddenly, metal clashing, magic moving through the trees. Astarion moved quickly, offing one of the offenders almost immediately. When he turned to see who was next, bloodlust in his eyes, he saw you being held by the throat. You were frozen, running out of oxygen, tears welling at your eyes. He ran through the trees, running his blade through your captor's back.

"Tav? My dear, are you alright?"

You can't speak, utterly shocked. No one had ever tried to choke you in the throes of battle, and it reminded you of awful things, things that were better left unsaid. He checks you for any other wounds as you're trapped in your own mind. The fighting continues, but he doesn't care. All that matters is you, the others can handle themselves just fine. And if not, that's their loss, not his.

After thoroughly checking you over, he can't find anything else of concern. The bruising on your neck though, it's black and blue already. Racing thoughts, wondering if there's been any lasting damage. He can't decide if he should be more concerned about the fact that you're practically frozen in place or if your windpipe is destroyed.

"The fuck are you doing? We have shit to deal with!"

Karlach silences her complaints when she sees you lying on the ground. Astarion doesn't even look up at her, afraid. He's only ever truly had one thing, one thing that was his, and that's you. Everything else feels so impermanent, but you? You're constant.

"Astarion! Astarion!"

She yells out his name until he finally snaps back to look at your tiefling friend.

"Take Tav back to camp, we've got it covered."

Karlach then runs off, back to assist Wyll with a shadow-covered half-elf. You groan in pain, your neck on fire. As you start to come back to reality, you realize you're in the vampire's arms, a vampire currently moving through the dark as quickly as possible. Neither of you have lights on you, but he knows there are still torches lit at camp, he just has to get there before the shadow curse starts to take hold. You're light-headed, both from lack of oxygen and the panic attack.

"Where...?"

"Hush darling, it's alright. We're almost there, almost to camp."

Through a couple more feet of trees, the two of you make it, bathing in the warm light of the torches posted behind the brush. He takes you back to your tent, where your bedrolls lie side by side. He silently curses himself for not knowing any healing magic, promising himself he'll finally learn after this.

"Aster?"

You call out groggily.

"Yes my love, I'm right here."

Ceasing the nervous pacing, he sits by your side.

"What... what happened?"

He almost doesn't want to say, worried about how you reacted while it was happening.

"One of the shadow-cursed, they... they had you in a nasty chokehold, and I killed them."

You shift, wishing he didn't have to know about all of this.

"Sorry."

"About what darling? You've done nothing wrong."

"About not telling you- not telling you about it."

You're gasping to get your words out, your throat clearly damaged. He furrows his brow in concerned confusion.

"I- I really don't like people touching my neck, doing anything to it to be honest. Wasn't expecting one of them to grab me like that."

Coughing at the end of your sentence, you don't see Astarion's eyes travel through his thoughts, realizing what that means.

"Darling... you let me feed off of you almost every evening."

You smile a little.

"I know."

He grabs one of your hands, clasping it in both of his.

"I'll never do it again. I'm so sorry, I had no idea."

Frantic, worried he's done something irreversibly wrong.

"No, no Aster it's okay. Does it suck sometimes? Yeah, but I need you to be healthy. Besides, what's a better way to work through your trauma than exposure therapy?"

"That's not fair. I can find something else, some other way."

"And what, go back to forest animals? You know there's nothing for you out here, in the darkness."

"Then I'll simply starve! Done it before, I'll do it again."

Gods, he's stubborn. You don't blame him, he would never want to cross anyone's boundaries after his have been trampled a million times.

"My love, come here."

You reach out, beckoning to pull him down beside you.

"If I didn't want to do it, I wouldn't. You need to feed, and I can provide that. You do plenty for me, let me do this one thing for you."

"But, but you hate it."

"Yeah. Those two things can coexist, my hate for people touching my neck, and my love for you. I can put up with the anxiety if it means you're okay."

"I would be okay though."

You cup his face in your hand, making sure he's looking at you.

"I'm telling you I'm okay, and that you deserve more than rats. Okay?"

You've been around him long enough, you know his logic. If he survived for two hundred years living off of flies and rats, he certainly doesn't need blood like yours. If he had starved for an entire year, he could take a few months before getting to Baldur's Gate. Sometimes you have to remind him that survival mode isn't living, that he's allowed to have nice things. Tears fall from his eyes.

"Are you sure my sweet? Absolutely certain?"

"Of course, and if I ever needed you to stop I would tell you, promise."

You put your pinky out, and he stares at it.

"What... what are you doing? Is this you offering me to feed off a singular finger? Because if so, that's uh-"

"No, gods! It's a pinky promise."

"A... a what?"

You start laughing, so hard that you start coughing again, tears falling down your face.

"You've never heard of a pinky promise?"

It pulls at your heart a little, realizing he probably never had anyone teach him.

"I guess I haven't."

You put your pinky out, and he does the same, and then you hook yours, interlacing the small finger with his.

"There, I pinky promise that I'll tell you if you need to stop feeding on me."

As you pull your hand away, he looks confused.

"And that's what, some non-verbal contract?"

"I guess so Mr. Magistrate."

You start laughing again.

"Okay, you have thoroughly scared me, and made me cry, and teased me, in one night! I'm not sure how much more I can take."

There's a hint of humor in his tone. Honestly, he also thinks it's ridiculous that he was a magistrate, considering he was terrible at it, at least from the small things he remembers.

"Well, it's over now. I'm okay, and we're safe."

He narrows his eyes.

"I'm still going to have Shadowheart look over you when the rest return."

"Well, that's your fault for not learning healing magic."

"Okay, you don't know any magic, so I don't want to hear it!"

The two of you stay up for hours, laughing at stupid jokes, hysterical from the tragedy that evening. Sometimes after something horrible, you just need a good laugh, especially with your easily provoked lover.

#astarion #baldur's gate 3 #baldurs gate astarion #astarion x reader #astarion x tav #fluff #comfort #angst

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spider-chris06 · 7 months

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Do you know why Spider-Verse Miles is my favorite Spider-Man?

He, without having a choice, had to do in two days, what took all the other Spider-Sonas in the multiverse weeks, become Spider-Man, all under the unimaginable pressure of being the successor to the previous Spider-Man of his universe, which left the bar too high, having to meet everyone else's expectations, and having to go through a tortuous journey while learning from his mentor.

Even when the spider-gang not only didn't trust him but even seemed to dislike Miles at first (Except, of course, Gwen and Peter B, who are very special cases)

And pressing him to see if he was ready and treating him like just a kid (Even Peni).

All so that he then went to his uncle, who was like a second father to him and someone who truly understood Miles, only to find out that he had always been a hitman, going so far as to almost end with the life of his nephew, until he realizes what he was about to do and... well, tragedy happens.

The death of Uncle Aaron, due to the depth and history behind it, remains the most tragic "death of Uncle Ben" in all of cinema... ever.

Miles stopped being the same since then, and even when a hurricane of emotions possessed him, he learned that no matter what, Spider-Man always gets up and keeps going, at the same time he learned to take his leap of faith. Before becoming Spider-Man he had a normal and happy life, but after being bitten by that spider his whole life fell apart, but of course, Miles is someone truly strong and full of determination thanks to the people close to him.

In two days, he surpassed almost the entire Spider-gang, and in a year and a half he become almost a professional as Spider-Man, even giving lessons to everyone else, and making it clear to Gwen and the others what truly means being Spider-Man, not standing by crossed arms while someone is in danger, but trying to do everything you can to save everyone, doing both things, even when it seems impossible, Spider-Man should always try, because everything it's possible.

At the same time that Miles felt stabbed in the back by the same people to whom he wanted to dedicate his entire future just to see them again since he felt alone and sad inside in the world without them, and, specially, without Gwen.

And let me remind something, Miles actually thinks she doesn't even love him and only sees him as a friend, but he still wants to see her

On the ATSV betrayal, he release all that hurricane of emotions that he had to swallow and accumulate inside during ITSV and during that entire year and a half for not having time for ALL those things said before, leading him to have anxiety and panic attacks (Something confirmed in the synopsis of the short "The Spider Within")

All so that they later reveal to him that he was a mistake, an anomaly, that he should never have been Spider-Man, that he killed the Peter of his universe, causing everything that gave MEANING to his life fell down in just a few minutes, leaving Miles more traumatized, mortified and with more trust issues than he already had before.

He really became one of the most tragic character of all the saga (Along with Peter B and, put it in some way, Miguel O' Hara)

And just because Miles looks with a cool and chill personality doesn't mean he's any less traumatized and mortified on the inside (An example is Andrew Garfield's Spider-Man).

Even though in the comics that nickname is only used because that is what his universe is called, in the movies, on the other hand, even though there are people on the internet who deny the fact that he is currently becoming an unstoppable phenomenon that is marking an entire generation and will mark future generations, Miles Morales proved to be, without a doubt, the Ultimate Spider-Man.

As a bonus, even though she always screwed up with everyone around her, both the living and the dead, Gwen showed that she really loves Miles and that he truly is the love of her life, however, needless to say, she has a lot of work to do in her redemption arc to be able to fix things with Miles, which will be very difficult but not impossible, even more so taking into account all the hate she received for everything that happened in ATSV.

Now she has to PROVE not only to him, but to all of us viewers, that she truly deserves to be with Miles, that they can have a life together by her own merit, and that all the hate towards her after the ATSV release it's truly unfair.

However, I have to be realistic, there are characters like Peni or even Peter B who should not be anything more than simple 'acquaintances' or 'partners' for Miles, since, with what they did, the term "Friend" It's too big for them.

In any case, Miles has the last word.

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quinnsadilla · 4 months

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fluff alphabet |clarisse la rue

author's note: Hi lovelies, please send me requests! I don't know what gave me the confidence to think I can write, probably delusion. Also, this is according to my personal views of Clarisse so don't be mad if it's different from what you've imagined. Leave a comment, I love interacting with people, xx.

warnings: I tried my best to keep it gender/race/cabin neutral for the most part but there are still some feminine coded things here and there. English is not my first language so excuse any grammar mistakes.

A ctivities - What do they like to do with their s/o? How do they spend their free time with them?

Starting off strong because with Clarisse sparring is a must. Although she doesn't like to think there will ever come a time in which she won't be there to protect you, it's still an essential part of life as a half-blood. And who better to train you than the daughter of war herself? And in case the apprentice becomes the master and you happen to beat her or pin her to the ground or even hold your dagger to her neck? Oh boy, she's done for. Actual heart eyes.

B eauty - What do they admire about their s/o? What do they think is beautiful about them?

She pretty much loves everything about you, she can't really just choose one aspect. Though, if she had to, she'd probably say she loves you for being supportive, understanding, and patient with her. You understand her better than anyone. That's what made her know you were the one for her. You can control her anger issues and calm her down when she's on the verge of exploding and she thinks that's beautiful.

C omfort - How would they help their s/o when they feel down/have a panic attack etc?

The art of intimacy or comfort never came easy to Clarisse. Her relationship with her mother isn't the best and hasn't been for a while now and her father is a grade A asshole. Her first instinct when you're feeling down is to fix it, to ask you who or what happened and give them a physical piece of her mind, but that's not always how it works. She'll pull you to her lap and hold you through the night or for as long as you need, wiping your tears and kissing your cheeks. She'll let you vent your heart out. You can tell her anything. Or nothing, if you prefer. She's not the best with words but her actions speak much louder.

D reams - How do they picture their future with their s/o?

She's never thought that much ahead if she's being honest. Never allowed herself to daydream too much into the future, choosing to live off the present for now. Sometimes, however, she pictures what could be only described as an utopia; to go on such a fantastical quest that the gods can't help but grant the both of you immortality, that way you'd bask in the glory of your love forever and ever.

E qual - Are they the dominant one in the relationship, or rather passive?

On the outside looking in it would seem Clarisse is the dominant one for sure. And in some ways she is; she likes that you can rely on her, she wants to provide for you, yearns to prove herself capable of such. Still, you're the one in charge. Clarisse is completely devoted to you, and your relationship means more to her than anything she's ever felt before. She cherishes it like no other, always at your beck and call.

F ight - Would they be easy to forgive their s/o? How are they fighting?

Clarisse is intense, that much we know. Her anger runs deep and her passion burns red. She's not perfect, and doesn't try to hide it either. She's hot-tempered, arrogant, she's got a short fuse and she holds grudges. Her fatal flaw is pride, which sometimes gets in the way of her good senses, so you'll most likely be the one apologizing first. Despite all that, she can't bear the thought of you being mad at her and absolutely hates fighting with you. It's like it's tearing her apart, especially if you're sad over something she said or did in the heat of the moment. Truth is, she is a fighter at heart so when all is said and done she'll try and make it up to you in some way, somehow.

G ratitude - How grateful are they in general? Are they aware of what their s/o is doing for them?

She is so appreciative of everything you do and are. As previously stated, Clarisse didn't get much love growing up so any semblance of that is something she clings hard to. She notices everything, every little thing you do for her and the underlying of your words. How you treat her and others is always stored in the back of her mind and she loves to be loved by you.

H onesty - Do they have secrets they hide from their s/o? Or do they share everything?

Clarisse is a very closed off person in general, she doesn't like feeling exposed and being possibly seen as weak. She'll tell you things but there's still some matters you have to pick up on your own and know how to approach them, especially regarding her feelings and personal struggles. She's very honest though, she feels like she owns you that much and appreciates you if you do the same for her. The more your relationship progresses you'll notice being able to read her like an open book because although she does her very best to hide it there's an underlying vulnerability to her behavior in certain moments you'll take proper notice of the more you know her.

I nspiration - Did their s/o change them somehow, or the other way around? Like trying out new things or helped them overcome personal problems?

Clarisse has definitely become more gentle since you. It still doesn't extend to your friends and family but more so how she behaves around you and knowing she doesn't have to put up that though front all the time. Her sense of self worth has improved as well, especially when you reassure her through her insecurities and doubts (never being the son her father wanted etc.)

J ealousy - Do they get jealous easily? How do they deal with it?

Oh, boy. Clarisse’s jealousy is very fuelled by… Well, anything really. She doesn't necessarily need a motive to go toe to toe with someone, just staring at you for a second longer than she deems them worthy of and she's ready for a fight. It's hard for anyone to get close enough to flirt with you because she's always there, by your side, kind of like a guard dog. But only because she knows how amazing you are and her insecurities do blurry some lines on what's acceptable. She's working on it though.

K iss - Are they a good kisser? What was the first kiss like?

Clarisse is definitely a good kisser. She doesn't have much experience, if any, but she's a natural. It sounds cheesy but the first time she kisses you was like butterflies and church bells dancing loudly in the wind. The way she cups your face so uncharacteristically soft and how she breaks off the kiss with a series of small pecks only to smile one of her beautiful smiles so close to each other's faces… Magical. It could be at the fireworks on the fourth of July or it could be in your favorite spot in the woods, soaked in lake water during a midnight swim or after a heated argument. No matter how many times Clarisse kisses you, she'll never not feel electricity similar to her spear’s sharp edge digging into her body and soul.

L ove Confession - How would they confess to their s/o?

Clarisse does not have a clue what she's doing. I feel like she'd say something in the heat of the moment; either confessing her true feelings or masking them by saying something hurtful she doesn't actually mean. In the latter scenario she'd storm off and berate herself over it but her pride and fear that you'd never look at her again made her put off her apology for some time and let it all sink in to talk to you when she's ready. That is until you start properly ignoring her and she nearly goes crazy with longing, just missing your overall presence and having her stomach turn to knots at the way things were left between you two. That's one of the few times Clarisse sucks it up and reaches for you. The apology is awkward but overwhelmingly honest and she tells you she's an idiot but you're content in forgiving her and giving her a second (actual first) chance.

M arriage - Do they want to get married? How do they propose? What would the marriage be like?

Again, Clarisse never thought she'd live to see the day she'd actually have a marriage prospect. Her life just doesn't seem complete without you anymore and the moment she realizes that she's done for. It would probably be while you're laying in bed together, your head on her chest while you play with her fingers. Your eyes are heavy with sleep but hers are wide open, thinking. “Will you marry me?” said while staring into the distance and you probably think she's joking except Clarisse is not one to joke about that sort of thing. “Not now. But eventually.” and whether you ask if she's serious or just accept it right away, she'd look at you seriously for a beat and then tackle you into a bear hug, crushing you underneath her. She doesn't see the point in a big wedding, but if that's what you're into, she won't mind.

N icknames - What do they call their s/o?

She is not immune to babe or baby but would still like to keep some variety. Things like sunshine, gorgeous, angel or others (I'm looking at you, person who created the “mama/s” HC). She does like your name very much, or probably a shortened version of it. Don't expect her to not tease you if any of these make you flustered.

O n Cloud Nine - What are they like when they are in love? Is it obvious for others? How do they express their feelings?

Clarisse likes to think she's good at hiding it when she's absolutely not. As Taylor Swift once said, you can hear it in the silence. Just the way her eyes soften when she's looking at you speaks millions, but people also get whiplash at how fast her mean attitude changes whenever you're around. Her love giving languages are probably acts of service and physical touch. She loves to do things for you, feeling all big and mighty whenever she can make your life just a little easier. Touching is also a must but we'll get to that in a second.

P DA - Are they upfront about their relationship? Do they brag with their s/o in front of others? Or are they rather shy to kiss etc. when others are watching?

Clarisse is not very comfortable with public displays of affection, because she is afraid of being judged or mocked by others for being weak or soft. She prefers to keep her relationship with you private and intimate, but doesn't mind the little things. She does gloat about being with you as well as showing you off, so that everyone on camp knows you're hers. She brags about you all the time and I mean, seriously, all the time. She's not a big hand holder but she almost over compensates by grabbing at your hips and thighs, throwing an arm over your shoulder or hiding her face in your neck. She especially loves bonfires when you sit on her lap and she can hold firmly onto your waist while she's talking to her siblings or just press her forehead against yours when her social battery is low.

Q uirk - Some random ability they have that’s beneficial in a relationship.

She's very perceptive. She may not know what has changed right away but she's also persistent so she'll figure it out in an instant. If it's the way you did your hair or something that happened along your day, even if you change your usual greeting. She notices and she'll definitely ask you about it.

R omance - How romantic are they? What would they do to make their s/o happy? Cliché or rather creative?

Clarisse wants to be loved, that's all she’s ever wanted, and she has so much love to give, therefore I believe she'll do just about anything to make you happy. That includes being an absolute sap. She honestly doesn't mind how cliche it is, if it works on you, you bet she's using it. If anyone cares to say anything remotely negative about you or your relationship she will promptly glare them into oblivion or give them something to really worry about.

S upport - Are they helping their s/o achieve their goals? Do they believe in them?

She is your absolute biggest supporter. Especially if you don't believe in yourself, then she's trying even harder for you to see just how well you can do something if you put your mind to it. With something like sword training she is more than willing to help you, rewarding you with kisses and cursing you for distracting her with your pretty face.

T hrill - Do they need to try out new things to spice out your relationship? Or do they prefer a certain routine?

Clarisse doesn't mind change, she rolls with it. If you have a certain way of doing things, a routine you like to follow, that's fine by her. If you're unpredictable, even better. She just loves to see what comes next in terms of your relationship, not necessarily needing anything to amplify her love for you. It's already hardwired into her.

U nderstanding - How good do they know their partner? Are they empathetic?

She knows you like the back of her hand. Even the slightest furrow of your eyebrows or tilt of your head and she'll be there in a second asking what's wrong. She does learn to be more empathetic towards your own struggles, which was hard at first because she wasn't sure how to see things from someone else's point of view. Though road but you make it work.

V alue - How important is the relationship to them? What is it’s worth in comparison to other things in their life?

She doesn't have much to look forward to so Clarisse values her relationship with you very highly, as you are one of the few people who can see past her tough and aggressive exterior and appreciate her softer and more vulnerable side. She is fiercely loyal and protective of you, and would do anything to keep you safe and happy.

W ild Card - A random Fluff Headcanon.

I actually read this one on a Wattpad story a while ago so credit to the original creator but, Clarisse has a teddy bear named Mr. Muscles she's had since she was like, nine and she cherishes it like it's her most prized possession. When she introduced this piece of information to you, you just found her so incredibly adorable you couldn't contain the giggles and she gets so hot in the face she pushes you off her bed and it's honestly one of the most memorable moments in your relationship.

X OXO - Are they very affectionate? Do they love to kiss and cuddle?

I headcanon Clarisse as your personal furnace as well as a koala bear so kisses and cuddles are a must, especially if it's cold outside. She loves to take naps with you, it gets to the point where she has trouble sleeping without you (so you give her a vial of your perfume to spray on Mr. Muscles for when you're away).

Y earning - How will they cope when they’re missing their partner?

Clarisse with you: 🥰

Clarisse without you: 😡

She gets snappier than usual and easily annoyed but she'll also get really sad because she's never had to deal with being away from you. Her siblings try to cheer her up by shoving some kid's head into the toilet but she's so disinterested in anything that does not involve you she just goes about her days training until she can see you again and show off her muscles.

Z eal - Are they willing to go to great lenghts for the relationship? If so, what kind of?

The answer is yes, one hundred percent. “Touch her and you die” trope goes so hard. Not only that but she would willingly sacrifice the world and herself for you and your relationship. She would go out of her way to make sure you are okay, that you are fed and hydrated and well rested, even messing up her own sleeping schedule in order to take better care of you.

#* ༄ ꒰ effy's works ꒱#clarisse la rue x reader #clarisse la rue #clarisse la rue fluff #clarisse pjo #clarisse x reader #percy jackson #percy jackon and the olympians #pjo series #pjo

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girlgenius1111 · 4 months

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it was war it wasn't fair

the great war chapter 2 :)

R's teammates debate the potential causes of her breakup. Ona comes to her defense. R realizes her feelings might not be as easy to avoid as she hoped.

ps. not one bed trope, but... teammates-sharing-a-hotel-room-at-an-away-game-and-one-has-a-nightmare-kind-of trope.

brief descriptions of a panic attack.

-----

You were sure that if you could just sleep you'd be fine. You'd never really had problems sleeping before, but in the days since your breakup with Alessia, you'd been struggling. Your brain wouldn't turn off; you went back over every little moment in your relationship, over analyzing, trying to figure out where it went wrong. Where you went wrong.

You honestly wished that was the only thing keeping you up. It wasn't. You couldn't get Ona out of your head. The kindness she'd been showing you, how perceptive she was of your feelings. It was overwhelmingly confusing, to be heartbroken by someone, and completely fixated on someone else at the same time.

Most of the time, you were glad to have such a close team. Everyone looked out for each other, and you knew they'd always have your back. Unfortunately, they seemed to think that having your back in this situation meant hovering over you every second of the day. It didn't help that you wouldn't tell them why you and Alessia had ended things.

Although you knew your teammates were keeping an extra close eye on you, you hadn't realized that some of them had begun to have suspicions about what had gone down. You'd come to a halt outside the locker room, after hearing your name. You'd forgotten your keys, and were heading back inside when you heard Keira's voice floating through the doorway.

"Leah said Alessia's really torn up about it, but she won't tell anyone what happened either."

"I knew they weren't doing well, but both of them seem too upset for it to be a mutual thing," Lucy responded.

"Y/n doesn't look like she's slept in a week," Alexia chimed in. Perfect. This was a group conversation, apparently.

"Maybe one of them cheated. I don't remember seeing y/n leave by herself when we went out last week," Keira mentioned offhandedly.

You knew Keira didn't mean anything by it; anyone looking at your relationship from the outside would guess that between the 2 of you, you'd surely be more likely to cheat than Less. You'd been significantly more of a playgirl before Alessia, and your friends had always joked they'd missed the version of you that went home with a different girl every weekend.

Still, the implication that you'd done what had, in fact, been done to you, really fucking hurt. You were more than prepared to go in there and start yelling, god knows you've been needing someone to shout at, but someone beat you to it.

"If she wanted you guys to know what happened she would have said," Ona's voice rang out through the locker room, unmistakably filled with anger. "You're supposed to be her friends, she's clearly having a tough time, and now you're accusing her of cheating? Behind her back? "

"Ona, I didn't mean anything by it," Keira began, clearly startled by the angry tone with which the brunette spoke.

"Y/n didn't cheat, she'd never do that," Ona replied fiercely. "You're lucky she didn't hear you suggest that, because I'm not sure any of you would have been able to put her back together."

With that, Ona stormed out of the room, turning the corner and coming to a sudden stop at the sight of you. You'd been too baffled by her words to move, and now it was too late.

"Y/n,"

"Thank you, Ona. Really," you said, blinking back tears. Behind Ona, Lucy, Keira, and Alexia walked out of the room, clearly on their way to go after the defender and calm her down. They all looked comically shocked at the sight of you, but you had no interest in talking to them. You spun on your heel, walking briskly out of the building and to your car, ignoring the calls of your name behind you. Ignoring, too, the tears that began to cloud your vision.

-----

Despite arriving home several hours ago, you lay in the same spot on the couch that you'd occupied since walking through the door. Your brain was working a mile a minute, going back and forth between fixating on Ona's passionate defense of you, and being angry at your teammates for speaking about you behind your back. You'd gotten texts from them, you knew, a particularly long apology from Keira, but you'd yet to open them. Ona had texted you too, and you hadn't read that either, for a very different reason.

You weren't mad at Keira for thinking you'd cheated, not really. You just hated that they were trying to figure out what happened; you'd made it clear you didn't want to talk about it, and here they were, dragging it back up over and over again. Logically, you knew it was because you weren't handling it well, and they could tell. Maybe you didn't like them worrying about you, either.

You were about to grab your phone and absolve your teammates of guilt, when there was a knock on your door. You walked to the door, looking through the peephole, and sighing. Of course.

"Hola, Alexia," you said, swinging the door open. Captain Alexia wasn't one to take team conflict lightly.

"Can I come in?" she asked, after returning your greeting. In response, you stepped to the side, allowing her into your apartment. She followed you in, sitting next to you on the couch. She had a familiar glint in her eyes, one that you knew meant she was determined to do something. What, you weren't exactly sure.

"Y/n, I'm really sorry we were talking about you when you weren't there. We're really worried about you, but there's no excuse. We should have brought our concerns to you," Alexia tells you sincerely.

"I know you're worried," you sigh. "And I probably wouldn't have been very receptive to you asking me about how I was doing."

"And what Keira said-"

"I get it. Of the two of us, I seem like the one who would sleep with someone else. I would have thought the same thing too."

"Does that mean Alessia cheated?" Alexia inquired, after a moment of silence. You looked at her, stunned, not quite sure how she came to that conclusion. In response to your expression, she explained.

"You're both apparently really upset, so it's clearly not mutual like you said. I know you didn't cheat. Sleeping around might have been your thing before Alessia, but it's not now, and it would be unfair to assume you hadn't changed. And, the way you phrased that last part. You "would have" thought the same thing too. That makes it sound like you no longer think that way."

You processed this for a minute, reminded of how smart Alexia was. You wanted to be annoyed, because if Alexia knew, it wouldn't be long before the whole team knew. Alexia had a strict policy of sharing everything with her co captains, who, famously, could not keep their mouths shut. You were really just relieved, though, like a weight had been lifted off your shoulders, now that you didn't have to try so hard to pretend to be okay.

"Yeah. She slept with some girl in a bar."

"I'm sorry, y/n."

"It's fine. We were probably going to break up anyway, and she's having a hard time. I don't even know why I'm upset."

Alexia's face changed at that, looking somewhat stern.

"It's not fine. She still betrayed your trust, even if you were going to break up. Even if she is struggling. That's not an excuse, y/n, and you're allowed to be upset that a relationship you spent a lot of time in ended so horrifically."

You shrugged in response and avoided her eyes, chewing on the inside of your cheek. Her hand came to rest on your shoulder before she spoke again.

"It's okay to be upset, y/n, you don't need to pretend you're not having a hard time with this. None of us will think any less of you." Alexia's tone was gentle, and at her reassurance, you turned to look at her, eyes big and wet with tears.

"Oh, nena," she said, pulling you in for a hug. You went willingly, allowing yourself to be comforted for the first time since the breakup. You cried softly into Alexia's shoulder, your captain's arms wrapped tightly around you. You felt safe here, in this little bubble with the older woman, safe enough to allow yourself to feel the hurt that you'd been pushing down for days.

-----

You'd assumed that after speaking with Alexia, you would feel better, and start sleeping better. You did feel better; it seemed that leaning on your friends during a tough time did, in fact, make getting through it easier. But you weren't sleeping better. If anything, it was getting worse. You'd wake up on the verge of having a panic attack, so filled with anxiety you could barely breathe. You didn't recall any nightmares that prompted this, and it didn't take long for you to calm down, but it made sleeping an ordeal.

The team's next game was an away game in Tenerife. You all had flown out the afternoon before the game, and tried to distract yourself from your exhaustion by goofing around with your teammates. Keira and Lucy had been relieved when you easily accepted their apologies.

Things with Ona were... more complicated. She'd seemed almost embarrassed after her outburst in the locker room, and had taken to avoiding you. Not completely, because you still caught her staring at you during practice, but enough that you found yourself inexplicably missing her presence. Those that had been on the receiving end of the defender's scolding were evidently intrigued by her behavior.

So, when you got your room assignments for the trip and saw Ona's name next to yours on the list, you couldn't help but roll your eyes at the clear attempt from Alexia to get you back on non-awkward terms.

You all headed to dinner first, and you couldn't help but watch as Ona barely touched her food, seemingly caught up in her own thoughts. You weren't quite sure if she was preoccupied with you, or something else, but you were determined to find out. She was your friend, after all, and despite your increasingly confusing feelings for her, you wanted to be there for her.

Ona beat you to your room after dinner, and you walked in to find her sitting nervously on the bed nearest to the door, fingers picking at her nails. She began speaking almost the minute the door had shut behind you.

"I just wanted to apologize, y/n, if I overstepped. It wasn't my place to say anything, and-" you cut her off.

"Oni, it's really okay. You don't need to apologize for sticking up for me. What you said was... it was really nice." You were blushing. Why were you blushing?

"Okay, good," Ona replied, smiling in relief. She turned, presumably to finish getting ready for bed.

"Are you doing okay? You've seemed stressed recently, not like yourself," you mention, heading to your luggage to act like your question was more casual than it really was. Out of the corner of your eye, you saw Ona freeze.

"Yeah, I'm okay. Just been a long week." she said. For some reason, you didn't believe her. Something in her voice told you that she was lying, but you didn't want to push.

"Well, if you want to talk," you say, smiling at her reflexively. It was almost unconscious, the way your lips lifted into a grin when you saw her face, freckles scrunching adorably as she returned your smile.

You turned back to your bag, internally shaking your head at yourself. You needed to get it together. You weren't so naive to not understand what was going on, but getting into a relationship with a teammate, so soon after the disastrous end to your previous one, seemed like the world's biggest mistake.

-----

Even though you'd done everything you could think to relax yourself before falling asleep, you still startled slightly only a few hours later, stuck in the land between wakefulness and slumber, your body thrumming with anxiety. It was a bad one, that was really your first conscious thought. You were already short of breathe, but still somehow drowsy, and you fought to drag your eyes open, and go through the familiar routine of grounding yourself.

You didn't realize you were breathing loudly, nor did you hear Ona the first time she said your name. It was only after the first time, when she spoke louder, that you turned your head to look at her in the other bed.

"Y/n? What's wrong?" She asked. You simply shook your head in response, not quite sure you could explain it. You wanted her to go back to sleep, let you pull yourself together on your own like you always did, but you should have known Ona wouldn't do that.

Ona rose from her own bed, approaching the side of yours. You'd sat up, resting your head in your hands as your chest rose and fell erratically.

"Y/n," Ona called softly, hovering nervously next to the bed, like she didn't know what to do.

"I'm ok-okay," you gasped out, admittedly not very convincingly.

"You don't seem okay," she said, doubt clear in her tone. "Do you want me to get someone? Lucy? Ale?" She turned as if to leave.

Suddenly, you were struck with fear at the idea of her leaving. You hadn't realized how much you'd been relying on her presence to calm yourself down until she mentioned leaving. You breathing sped up again, and you reached out frantically, grabbing a fist full of her shirt. She turned back to you, seemingly surprised at your movements. her face was filled with a kindness that was so distinctly Ona, you felt yourself calming down again at the mere sight of it.

"Hey, I won't go, it's okay," she reassured you, taking a careful seat on the edge of your bed. She gripped your hand in hers, tugging it off of her shirt, and you squeezed it gratefully. She sat next to you, allowing you to regulate your breathing, not saying anything, but apparently realizing you just needed to feel her next to you. When you were calm, a few minutes later, you turned to her, prepared both to thank her, and apologize profusely, but she asked a question before you could open your mouth.

"Is this why you haven't been sleeping?" she questioned. Her eyes were peering into yours, and you wished the lights were on, so you could see the warm honey brown staring back at you.

"Yeah. I don't really know what's going on, I just wake up really anxious," you admit, again reminded of Ona's miraculous power to get you to tell her the truth. Ona contemplated for a minute, before she motioned for you to scoot over. You did, although confused, and watched as she slid into the bed next to you. Ona's had her poker face as she laid down, resting her head on your pillow, and motioning you to nestle in next to her.

You were planning to object, really. Instead of opening your mouth, though, your body moved almost without your permission, and you were soon laying next to Ona, head tucked comfortably into her chest. It was such a natural thing, laying against her, like something you'd done a thousand times. You weren't tense, or uncomfortable. You just felt sleepy, suddenly, and enjoyed the feel of the spaniard's soft t-shirt on your cheek, not even questioning it when her arms wrapped around you, holding you securely against her.

Ona didn't say anything, and she didn't need to. You were already drifting off, remarkably calm for someone snuggling one of their friends, who they maybe, possibly, were developing a crush on. You didn't feel butterfly's like you would have expected. Ona never made you feel nervous. Flustered, sure. But as you drifted off into the best sleep you'd had in weeks, you were truly struck with how she comforted you easily, and how she got you to accept that comfort with no argument.

When you woke the next morning, still cuddled close to Ona, you marveled at the fact that you'd slept through the rest of the night. You watched her face as she slept next to you, the morning sunlight hitting her freckles perfectly. You wondered if you could count them all.

You also wondered how much longer you could pretend you weren't falling for the girl next to you.

-----

#woso imagine #woso #woso x reader #barca femeni #barcelona femeni x reader #ona batlle x reader

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yandere-wishes · 6 months

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Hot Take

But has anyone ever stopped to think about the Damsel in Distress? Has anyone ever considered the feelings of the princess locked away in a tower? We all like to make fun of the Damsel in Distress trope but has anyone in the last 100 years stopped to think about how she feels? How worthless she thinks she is because she can't get herself out of that dreaded tower. She can't save herself, she's powerless, and as much as we like to mock her for that. We overlook how this powerlessness becomes such an overwhelming sensation inside of her. So many "if onlys…" swirling around in her head. If only she was as strong as the dragon that captured her. If only she was as cunning as the prince that promised to save her. If only she had a fraction of the combat abilities of the knights. If only, if only.

Not to mention how lonely she must feel and how nerve-wracking it is waking up every day wondering if everyone you ever knew-ever loved- has forgotten you. she's been told to wait for a prince or a knight or some dashing stranger. A harbinger of true love…but what if they never come? What if they have more important things to do than rescue her? The long hours spent in a quiet room with a monotonous view. Withering around in self-loathing on the brink of another panic attack. It's enough to drive anyone crazy.

There's also the part of NOT being able to save herself. She's not cunning enough, not brave enough, not strong enough. And maybe she is, maybe she's all those things but her self-doubt and pity have trapped her in a constant web of "can't".

She can't save herself

She isn't worth being rescued

She's nothing

Destined to rot away in the tower.

And then when/if she is rescued it's borderline impossible to readjust to society. All those years of being utterly alone make it painfully difficult to be around people. She can't read social cues or even understand what half the people are talking about. She misses the tower, the isolation, and the quiet. Yet never wants to return to it. You can forget about her making friends, everyone seems to avoid her, deeming her less because she was captured in the first place. Whispering behind her back about how 'they' would have saved themselves. Or how their heroes would have come to save them so much faster than hers did. Even the king and queen are rigid around her. Not knowing how to act or what to say, but growing increasingly more vexed at her ineptitude to "be normal" again. Our poor princess is convinced she'll always be alone, fated to a life of misery.

Oh, and let's not forget the nightmares. The terrors of the tower crept out of her subconscious each night. Tormenting her when she dares to close her eyes. The endless hallways and countless rooms filled with nothing. The feeling of the cold bricks under her bare feet as she wandered the corridors in a haze of boredom and anxiety. The dragon's there too, sharp teeth on display ready to bite and burn her at the slightest defiance. She can feel his embers tickling her arm. The markings of his claws on her cheek throbbing. She can't rember how many scars he left. How many open wounds that healed wrong.

She woke up screaming that night, just like the three nights before that. Waking up the whole castle. It's fellow residents irritated at her nightly "antics". She stopped sleeping after that. The days aren't much better

the constant feeling that what originally dragged her into that tower is coming after her again, is always at the forefront of her mind. She's skittish, reserved. The queen still doesn't understand why her daughter refuses to be touched. Rejecting every hug she tries to give her. The king can't comprehend why the princess barely talks, stuttering out what few words she utters.

The whole kingdom is gossiping. Repulsed by what their so-called princess has become. The dragon has been vanquished, the tower toppled. Move on. Little do they know both terrors still live on within her. Not to mention their constant negative views of her only feed her self-hatred all the more.

"Why can't the princess just be normal…"

Poor princess, forever trapped, wither by the dragon, the tower, the kingdom…or herself.

No, seriously I think the damsel in distress is one of the most heartbreaking self-reflecting tropes ever made.

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fangirlingpuggle · 6 months

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Half asleep very very dumb one piece fic prompt where canon straw hats somehow end up in a modern AU waking up in their counterparts bodies and are so confused.

Luffy wakes up somewhere he doesn't recognize doesn't have his devil fruit powers and then runs into Sabo and Ace, while Luffy is freaking out suddenly Crocodile shows up, Luffy finding out Crocodile is his dad. Luffy is acting off and of course Sabo and Ace are in overprotective brother mode and Crocodile is in overprotective dad mode and already calling their doctor, who he has on speed dial because Sabo, Ace and Luffy are agents of chaos and it is not the first time there has been a panicked call to the doctors.

Although Kureha hasn't picked up because she's already got the freaking out call from Hiriluk who is freaking out because Chopper is freaking out because Chopper has not only woken up with his dad alive but is human, Kureha is to busy dealing with the pair of crying panicking messes to answer her phone for a while, and has a lot of missed form calls not just from Crocodile.

Mihawk is also calling haven come home to a freaking out Perona and Zoro, and for some reason Zoro is asking why Perona isn't floating. Her can only assume that a hit to the head for sparring finally got through Zoro's thick skull.

Nami and Usopp are also in major freak outs having woken up to dead parents now alive. Brook more the freak out that he is now alive as well as Yorki also being alive.

Sanji may be freaking out worst as he woke up to see all his siblings and went straight to panic attack, only to cause almost all his siblings into one as well, these Vinsmokes have been raised by Sora and Zeff after Judge got 0 custody rights in the divorce and all very VERY overprotective siblings Sanji has literally had to threaten all of them and get his mom to threaten all of them to be able to go out on a date with Zoro without at least one sibling hanging around as a shadow.

Robin and Franky have a different but still major freak out waking up together, and then proceed to freak out more when seeing missed calls from Tom and Saul.

Bonus: Sabo suggests calling Dragon to help out because he has been trying to parent trap their dad and Luffy's other dad who is like his mentor and he's been trying to get them, back together for years. Ace deeply deeply disagrees thinking their dad can do way better. Crocodile is currently 110% done still trying to call Kureha and also try and convince Luffy that no he is not made of rubber.

#one piece #au #fic prompt #straw hats #crocodad #dadodile #canon meeting modern au #monkey d. luffy #crocodile #sabo #portgas d ace #roronoa zoro #vinsmoke sanji #zosan #vinsmoke siblings #chopper #humor #this is very very dumb

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dixons-sunshine · 1 month

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hi! i love your writing! parent daryl is a huge comfort for me, could you do daryl has a teenage kid and is comforting them during a panic attack/nightmare/something else along those lines?

Night Terrors | Daryl Dixon x Fem!Reader

*GIF isn't mine.*

Summary: The day your daughter was born, Daryl swore that he'd always be there for her, no matter what. That included soothing her from her night terrors whenever they kept her from sleeping.

Genre: Fluff.

Era: Commonwealth (Daryl doesn't leave.)

Warnings: Fear of abandonment, nightmares.

Word count: 1k

A/n: Back at it again with another Dad!Daryl fic, and this idea was so cute. I didn't use Hazel as a name this time because I didn't want it to become repetitive for y'all. Let me know if I should switch up the names or keep going with Hazel. Anyway, I hope you enjoy!

As always, my requests are open for any TWD requests, as well as Scud Frohmeyer requests.

—

“Dad? Daddy?”

At the sound of the small, timid voice calling out to him, Daryl slowly opened his eyes and blinked the sleep away. He sat up slightly and looked to his side, where he saw his daughter staring at him, tears glistening in her eyes.

“Peanut? Wha's wrong? Wha' happened?” Daryl questioned, sitting up in the bed and giving his daughter his full attention.

Bailey looked at him tearfully, hugging herself with her arms. She ducked her head and looked at the ground, embarrassment flooding her body. “Nothing. I just...”

Daryl frowned and swung his legs over the edge of the bed, careful not to shake it too much and wake you up. “It ain't nothin'. Talk to me, Peanut. Wha's wrong?”

“I had a nightmare,” Bailey whispered, sniffling slightly as fresh tears started to trickle down her face.

Daryl's face softened instantly. He quietly got up from the bed and gently ushered Bailey out of the room with him, closing the door behind him before walking into her room with her.

“C'mon, lay down,” Daryl softly urged her. When Bailey obliged, Daryl grabbed the covers and tucked her in, sitting down next to her. He brought his hand up to gently brush her hair out of her face. “Talk to me. Wha' was the nightmare 'bout?”

Bailey hesitated for a moment, wiping the tears from her eyes. “It's stupid,” she mumbled, casting her gaze away from her father.

Daryl frowned and shook his head. “Ain't stupid if it makes ya upset.”

Bailey's teary eyes met his again, and she inhaled sharply before letting out a sigh. “Please don't ever leave. You or Mom. Please.”

Daryl's frown deepened. “Of course we won't leave. Where's this comin' from?”

“My dream,” Bailey started with a whisper. “You and Mom... You didn't love me anymore. Said you never wanted me in the first place. The two of you left me.”

Daryl instantly leaned forward to embrace Bailey. She wrapped her arms around him and cried into his shoulder, soaking his shirt with her tears, but he didn't mind.

“Yer mama and I ain't goin' nowhere,” Daryl reassured his daughter, placing a soft kiss against her temple. “We love ya so much. Ain't nothin' ever gon' change tha'. The day yer mama found out she was pregnant with ya was the best day of both our lives. Yer mama was so happy, and I was too. We're still very happy. Ya are the best thing tha's happened to us. Dun' ever believe otherwise, alrigh'?”

Bailey nodded against his shoulder, sniffling quietly as she pulled back. She settled back into her bed, turning over on her side, still facing Daryl. “I'm sorry I woke you.”

“Dun' need to apologise,” Daryl assured her, gently caressing her head. “Now try and get some sleep, alrigh'? Yer mama and I will be here in the mornin'.”

Bailey nodded and closed her eyes, visibly relaxing under her father's touch. It didn't take long for her to start drifting off again, her father's reassurance and comforting touch lulling her back into slumber. “I love you, Daddy,” Bailey mumbled before drifting off, her breathing evening out.

Daryl smiled and placed one final kiss against her temple. “I love ya more, Peanut.”

Quietly, Daryl slipped from Bailey's room and made his way back into his shared room with yours. Once inside with the door closed behind him, Daryl was surprised to note that you were sitting up, clearly wide awake and not just arising from your slumber.

“Wha' are ya doin' up?” Daryl asked curiously, going back over to his side of the bed and climbing back under the covers.

“I could ask you the same thing,” you countered, moving to lay down on his chest when he beckoned you closer.

“Bailey had a nightmare,” Daryl explained, running his fingers up and down along your spine. “I tucked her back into bed.”

“Oh,” you whispered, frowning slightly at the revelation that your daughter had a nightmare. “Is she okay?”

Daryl nodded. “She'll be alrigh'. Jus' scared we'll leave her. Tha' was her nightmare. I dun' know where tha' fear came from.”

“It's been a recurring nightmare for a while now,” you started. “It got better when we originally came here, but I guess it must be kicking up again.”

“She's been havin' this nightmare fer a while?” Daryl inquired with a frown. “Why dun' I know 'bout this?”

“Because she hid it from me for a while. I only know about it because it got too bad for her to handle on her own and she woke me up one night, too.”

“But why would she think we'd ever leave her?” Daryl asked.

“Because people leave all the time. She's scared that we'll see her as a nuisance, as a burden, someone who isn't worth sticking around for. She's just like you were back when we first got together,” you explained, placing a kiss on his clothed chest. “But we'll just have to show her how much we love her. That we aren't leaving her, ever. Just like I had to do with you.”

Daryl hummed. “S'true. We'll love her so much, she'll get sick of us.”

“I love you so much. Does that mean you're sick of me?” you asked playfully.

Daryl chuckled, placing a kiss against your forehead. “Sick of ya?” he began. “Never.”

#krys writes .ೃ࿐#daryl dixon #daryl dixon x reader #daryl dixon imagine #the walking dead #daryl dixon x female reader #daryl x reader #twd daryl #norman reedus #norman reedus x you #norman reedus x reader #twd daryl dixon #daryl dixon fanfiction #daryl dixon fanfic #the walking dead daryl #daryl fanfiction #dad!daryl dixon #dad!daryl #domestic!daryl

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unclewaynemunson · 9 months

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More often than not, it doesn't work out.

Robin first learned that lesson with Vickie, when she thought she found the love of her life but ended up breaking things off because the way in which Vickie mirrored her anxiety back to her enhanced it tenfold and it turned out to be completely exhausting to keep up with that after the first wave of butterflies had died down.

After Vickie, there was Laura. Laura, with whom it seemed to work out until she told Robin that she couldn't bear keeping up with her weird, unsettling and way too vivid nightmares about Russian spies and monsters from fantasy stories every other night.

After Laura, there was Julia. Julia, who was amazing for four whole months until she told Robin with tears in her eyes that she couldn't tolerate the cheating anymore. It didn't matter how often Robin told her that sleeping with someone didn't necessarily mean sleeping with someone, that Steve was like a brother to her – and that the whole thing was utterly ridiculous in the first place because Robin was very much a lesbian. Needless to say, it didn't work out.

Then, there was Amy. Amy, who, like a cruel twist of fate, actually cheated on Robin. It was only a one-time thing, a drunken kiss during some stupid party, but it was enough to damage Robin's trust in her irreparably. So it didn't work out.

Up until then, she had chalked it up to a string of bad luck or maybe bad taste. But after Louise (who brought up the nightmares again), Valerie (who wanted some adventure in the bedroom and had to guide Robin through a panic attack filled with inexplicable flashbacks when she tried tying her to the bedframe), and Mathilde (who made a problem of Robin's regular 3am calls with Steve when neither of them could sleep), she starts to wonder if it wouldn't be more probable that it is herself who is the problem instead of this whole list of girls.

“Don't you dare say that about yourself,” says Nancy with fire in her voice when Robin finally dares to voice that thought out loud.

They're both lying down on Nancy's brand new couch, a pair of legs dangling over each side and their heads right next to each other in the middle. Except for that couch, the living room is still empty. Boxes are piled up everywhere, still waiting to be unpacked, but they can wait a little longer.

Robin is happy to have Nancy at her side again. It's been a while: college and differing career paths kept them separated through the majority of their friendship. But now Nancy has found her way back to Indiana, only half an hour away from where Robin has been living with Steve and Eddie ever since Mathilde broke up with her a few months ago.

She hasn't really been dating anyone since, and now that Nancy is also living in Indianapolis, she wonders if she'll ever feel the need to. No girl would ever be able to compare to Nancy Wheeler, after all; Robin knew that much as soon as she saw Nancy stepping out of the U-Haul wearing pastel-pink dungarees, with all grown-out curls cascading over her back and a thick layer of eyeliner around her beautiful doe eyes.

“Well, it could be true,” Robin presses on.

“No it can't!” Nancy says it in such an indignant tone that it makes Robin snort skeptically.

“I'm serious, Rob.” It sounds stern. “I know you and I know it's not true. It's not your fault.”

“You're seriously telling me I've been dating seven girls over the past seven years, and none of it worked out, and it's all because of them? All those relationships were wildly different; I'm the one consistent factor in all of them, Nance.”

“Yeah, but that doesn't mean you're the problem.” Nancy says it like it's obvious. “Maybe the problem is that you've been picking girls who all have one single thing in common, and that is that they never wanted to make the effort to really listen to you.”

"Huh." Robin closes her eyes for a second, taking her time to let those words sink in. She never thought about it that way. “You think so?”

“Yeah. Mathilde was a bitch anyway,” Nancy says matter-of-factly. “I mean, did she ever ask you to explain why you've been feeling the need to call Steve in the middle of the night lately?”

Robin shrugs. “That's a bit difficult to explain, isn't it?” she points out.

“That's what I'm saying,” says Nancy. “It's exactly why you keep picking out those kind of girls. Because if you're with someone who will actually listen to your story, you're gonna have a problem. Right?”

And, well, shit. It's not like Robin asked for a free therapy session here, but... Nancy is right. Of course she is. She always is.

Robin turns her head to the side, exchanging her view on the white ceiling for a much better one: Nancy's face, so close to her own that she can take in every little detail. The elegant slope of her nose, the wing of her eyeliner, the freckles on her cheeks, her perfect lips... Her face in this en-profile position is mesmerizing. It's not the first time that the thought comes to Robin's mind that Nancy looks like someone who should be in old paintings.

“Do you think you'll ever try to find someone who listens to you?” Nancy asks.

Robin tries to imagine that scenario; it's difficult. Not just because she doesn't really know how that would work in the first place, but mostly because she doesn't actually want to.

“Nah,” she says, trying to make it sound casual instead of really fucking sad.

“Why not?”

Because nobody can ever compare to you anyway, she thinks. But she bites her tongue and shrugs, turning her head back to the ceiling.

“That would be way too complicated, wouldn't it?”

Nancy shuffles and sighs; Robin feels her breath tickle against her cheek.

“I guess,” she mumbles.

“How did you do it?” Robin asks.

Nancy's dating history is not as tumultuous as Robin's. After things ended between her and Jonathan, she had been solo for a while. Then, there had been Ben, and then Kurt, and then it had again been just Nancy for a long time.

“Did what?”

“Did you ever find a way to tell Kurt about all the shit?”

“Nope.” It doesn't exactly sound like she tried very hard.

“Why not?”

“Because I did the same thing you did,” Nancy says. “Chose the wrong people to do that with. So I didn't have to think about it.”

That doesn't feel completely fair to Robin; Nancy had been with her boyfriends longer than Robin had been able to keep even one of her girlfriends around.

“I liked Kurt, he was nice,” she remarks in an attempt to point out the difference without being too blunt about it.

Nancy sighs. “Yeah, he was nice, but he wasn't... Right. I knew that from the beginning. Same with Ben. Even with Jonathan, in a way. Or Steve, even though I was too young to realize it.”

“What do you mean, not right?”

“Boys.”

“Wha-” Robin turns her head sideways so fast that she's lucky she doesn't pull a muscle.

She sees how Nancy's eyes drop from the ceiling and slowly find their way to Robin's face.

“Took me a while to figure that one out,” she says quietly. “But yeah.”

Robin wishes they were lying in a different position; one that would have made it possible for her to take Nancy's hand and squeeze it gently, or to wrap an arm around her, or to pull her in for a hug.

“Thank you for telling me.”

A soft smile is tugging at Nancy's lips. She looks at Robin like she wants to say something, then looks back up to the ceiling again, and Robin copies her movement, biting her own tongue again in order to give Nancy the time and space she clearly needs right now.

Usually, Robin struggles with silences; she'll feel words pile up inside of her until her need to fill the empty space will take over and she'll inevitably start rambling. But this one actually feels comfortable. She wishes that they could keep lying side-by-side on this couch for the rest of the day.

Unfortunately, they can't, though. There's still way too much work to be done. So Nancy hauls her to her feet and soon, the couch gets company of a coffee table, a couple of cozy armchairs, a bookcase, a TV... There are boxes filled with books, kitchen appliances, picture frames, video tapes, clothes; there are closets that need to get assembled and a heavy bedframe that they can barely get to where they need it.

It feels like it will never end, but after two long days of hauling furniture around, the apartment starts to look like a home. A home for which Robin gets a spare key. It rests cold and shiny against the palm of her hand, where Nancy has dropped it, and it makes her realize how real it is that Nancy is finally living close to her again.

Nancy's couch becomes just as much of a home for Robin as her own living room. It's where the two of them share stories, tell secrets, laugh loudly, cry ugly... It's where they watch movies until deep in the night, snuggled up to each other under a soft blanket. It's where they read books side-by-side on lazy Sunday afternoons. It's where they listen to music together and where they listen to what the other has to tell about their day or about anything that's on their minds. It's where Robin finally gets the courage to tell Nancy that nobody has ever listened to her the way Nancy does. It's where Nancy scoots closer towards her to press a kiss against her cheek, right before she finds Robin's lips and they share their first kiss, warm and homely and perfect.

More often than not, it doesn't work out. But once in a lifetime, it does. And once is exactly enough.

#don't mind me rambling about stranger things #ronance #robin buckley #nancy wheeler #stranger things #fruity ficlet

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flowerandblood · 1 month

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The Gate of Salvation NSWF Alphabet

[ young pope • Aemond x catholic • female ]

NSWF Alphabet for Aemond from my mini series The Gate of Salvation made for my one year celebration. I show perspective of what it looked like with his beloved. Dirty things below.

A = Aftercare (what they’re like after the act)

Afterwards, he is a complete devastated, crying mess, going through some kind of panic attack, and the only thing that can calm him down is her reassurances that she still loves him, that she is not disgusted by him, that he is not a bad person, that she forgives him.

He snuggles up to her and literally sinks into her body, pressing his face into the hollow of her neck, feeling safe only with her. Once he calms down he makes sure she is comfortable, that he hasn't hurt her and she doesn't need anything.

B = Body part (favorite body part their own or their lovers)

He adores every part of her body because she is a miracle of God for him, but he loves her eyes most, her soft, tender gaze, he melts thinking about it.

C = Cum (anything that has to do with it)

He cums only on his own hand. He doesn't want her to be touched by the effect of his sin, dying internally every time she licks everything off his fingers.

D = Dirty secret (Pretty self explanatory)

Well... he is the Pope. Everything he does with her is his dirty secret.

E = Experience (do they know what they’re doing)

Before his beloved: absolutely none. His morning erections aroused his disgust. He had never thought of such things before he met her, considering them simply sinful and primitive.

F = Favorite position

Sitting with her on top, his face nestled between her breasts, he can then touch and feel her in every possible way, can kiss her and watch her reactions, which calms and arouses him, while at the same time not really seeing anything.

G= Goofy (how serious are they)

There is no room for laughter in this sacred act of their closeness, what they do and how they do it is a very serious matter for him.

H= Hair (grooming habits)

All natural and clean, as God himself has created him.

I = Intimacy (in the moment romantic or rough/dirty)

He is very insecure and affectionate, he needs to feel her close, her embrace and her voice give him a sense of security. He could spend the whole night whispering in her ear how much he loves her, how much he needs and wants her, satisfying her with his fingers, gazing in awe at her fulfilment, comparing her to Bernini's Baroque sculptures.

J = Jack off (do they masturbate and how often)

He only masturbates in front of her to restrain himself from throwing himself at her right away and put his cock inside her – he wants to feel her this way when he's already on the edge. He doesn't touch himself when he is alone and thinks about her, repenting in this way.

K = Kink (kinks what they like possibly unusual)

Definitely a religious kink. Her calling him Holy Father when he touches her, when he slips his fingers deep inside her, or thrusts into her, send him into another orbit.

L = Location (where they like to get it on)

As comfortable as possible, in her room on her bed, somewhere they can both feel safe because they are still stressed about being caught in the act.

M = Motivation (things that makes them tick/turn ons)

Her telling him that she loves him, that she is only his, the sight of her at least partially exposed body, her crossed legs when she sits, her breasts peeking through from under her dress when she is not wearing a bra. His manhood literally throbs with delight at the sight of her every day.

N = No (turnoffs or absolutely won’t do)

He would never let her give him a blowjob or handjob. He would die of despair, shame and regret for humiliating and insulting her. Anal and other weird things are out of question. Big no.

O = Oral (receiving or giving and how skillful they are)

He would never let her suck him off, but he himself had dreamed of tasting her from the very beginning.

He would arrange everything so that the room was completely dark and he could not see this intimate part of her body, but only feel it with his sense of touch, and then with slow, timid flicks of his tongue he would bring her to the brink of despair.

Hearing her sobs, her thighs shaking in his embrace, her hands clutching his hair, he would slide his tongue deep inside her, eating her weeping cunt like a starving man until she came all over his face with the loudest, sweetest moans of pleasure he had ever heard.

He would do it often to her ever since.

P = Pace (how fast they are and how long they last in bed)

Because he's constantly aroused and doesn't masturbate when she's not next to him, he doesn't last very long, but neither of them cares.

Q = Quickie (do they prefer fast and hard)

On the beginning they do it painfully slowly, but once he's deep inside her, his brain disconnects, and he slams into her as if he hasn't seen her for a month.

R = Risk (do they like to try new things)

Definitely not. Meeting his beloved is risky itself.

S = Stamina (how many times they can go and how long each round lasts)

After one round, he is so overwhelmed and shocked that he needs at least a day or two to calm down and come back to himself.

T = Toys (are they game for using sex toys on themselves or lovers)

None.

U = Unfair (how do they tease or do they enjoy suspense themselves)

When he sees her talking or getting close with any other men, his mind goes into the mode of a stern judge who asks her if she is sure that she deserves to be fulfilled. He gives it to her, satisfied only when she is a babbling, leaking, quivering little mess, reminding her to who her body and soul belong to.

V = Volume (are they loud, what sounds, and do they talk)

When he touches her in her most intimate place, when he rubs against her leaking cunt with his cock, when he thurst into her he is a whimpering, panting, babbling mess.

W = Wild card (random canon of any sort)

None.

X = X-ray (what’s down below in dem pants)

Heaven's Delight.

Y = Yearning (sexdrive level)

When he sees her, he is melting. It doesn't necessarily always end with sex, but he always wants to be as close to her as possible.

Z = Zzzz (do they sleep after if so how quickly after)

He makes sure that she fell asleep first, listening to her calm breathing, and he cuddle himself between her breast and sleep like a little baby.

He wants to cry when the alarm clock on his phone rings before sunset so that he has time to get up and go back to his rooms before anyone realises he's not there. He is so comfy and warm in her embrace, lying with her under the duvet, that he only wishes he could stay with her longer.

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jellyveesh · 2 months

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Feel free to reject but can we get the Hazbin Crew with a Reader who’s sinner animal form is a fainting goat?

face first

fandom ## hazbin hotel (fainting goat-sinner reader)

characters ## charlie morningstar, alastor, angel-dust, husker, sir pentious

prompt ## the hazbin hotel is filled with unique characters, and amongst them is a little goat sinner with a habit of just... fainting? how will the residents of the hotel treat their newest addition, and how will they react to their disorder?

contains ## SHOW SPOILERS, gender-neutral reader, canon-typical character behaviours/habits, swearing, reader has a neuromuscular disorder, autistic coded lucifer

thank you for the request!! i hope i did it justice masterlist

for some context, 'fainting goat' syndrome is actually called myotonia congenita - an inherited neuromuscular disorder characterised by the inability of muscles to quickly relax after a voluntary contraction, like flinching

the disorder is not only common in goats, but can be found in humans too!

so chances are your demon form was formed as a result of your disorder when you were alive, and so you became a goat featured sinner

and whilst yes, this may be hell, and yes, people have seen it all, you randomly just fainting is absolutely horrifying

and yes you've found yourself in many precarious situations and, as such, would have to be strong to fend for yourself in this dog-eat-dog world

so when the opportunity of a safe haven, poorly drawn on a flimsy piece of paper and stuck messily to a notice board, is presented to you... you, of course, go to check it out!

CHARLIE MORNINGSTAR

honestly, when charlie first met you, she was instantly drawn to your goat-like features

because like, you're clearly twins! she's goat themed, you're goat themed! what could make you less twin-like?!

so she wasn't really listening when you randomly and shortly mentioned you have a habit of your muscles seizing and you dropping to the floor during stressful situations as a result

and charlie was likely the person who first triggered your 'fainting' - simply with one cheerful outburst

she had been particularly excited to try out a new redemption activity that she squealed super loud, unsuspecting to everyone to everyone else who got equally startled

then you just kind of... dropped, to the ground, face first, with a sickening crack

charlie thought you were dead.

like actually

full blown panic attack whilst the others minorly panicked

after a few moments, you managed to break free from the tightness of your muscles and sit up - heaving a huge sigh in relief and rubbing at your bloodied nose

it was like you had been revived

charlie got up and immediately started apologising, hugging you and petting at your head in an attempt to comfort you

she also apologised for seemingly brushing past such an important detail

charlie then sets out on a mission to 'faint-proof' the entire hotel, or at least the areas you'd likely be in frequently

she also makes sure that either razzle or dazzle are with you whilst you're inside or outside of the hotel, so they can alert her if you do have a fall or need help

will never forgive herself for that one incident, and will still panic every time you fall but it's endearing - because it shows she cares a lot

she also scolds the others if they ever intentionally (some of them do, all the time) attempt to scare you so your disorder kicks in

charlie and vaggie are honestly the most accommodating to your disorder and help out wherever they can

ALASTOR

oh, he finds it endlessly amusing

one of the sinners who will intentionally startle you just to watch the spectacle

at least has the decency to make sure you won't hurt yourself, he's gentlemanly enough to at least catch you before you hit the floor

but he does everything in his power to spook you

it's funny

and he finds it kind of cute, because he saw it happening to goats when he was alive

and you've reassured them multiple times that the disorder doesn't actually hurt, it's the act of hitting the floor that does

so what's the harm?

but he also gets extremely annoyed if someone else scares you and triggers your disorder - because like... why are they playing with HIS entertainment?

will accompany you outside of the hotel often, because, really, what's scarier than the radio demon? nothing, that's what!

he joins in on charlie's faint-proofing efforts, but only half-heartedly because he enjoys the excuse to hold you

did i mention alastor loves goats, because he REALLY loves goats

if your muscles seize for an extended period of time, alastor makes it his job to take care of you - ensuring you're comfortable and kept company

this is regardless of whether he's the cause or not (he probably is)

despite his endless teasing, he really does like you - you're a sweet addition to the hotel and you're polite, and honestly... that's a step above nearly everyone besides charlie, and is extremely rare for hell

if you also enjoy old jazz music? sold, you are now his favourite little sinner (sorry nif)

ANGEL-DUST

another resident who tests the limits of your disorder - but instead of scaring you, he enjoys teasing you in flirty ministrations

especially because it seems like being flirted with startles you

he will also catch you though because it's all harmless fun, but he'd kick his own ass if you got hurt over something stupid

much like alastor, he is also really protective of you if someone OUTSIDE of the hotel messes with you

got mad at cherry once for doing it and carried you home grumpily, ignoring cherry's texts until you convinced him that it didn't matter and she didn't mean any harm

she promised she wouldn't do it again

she did it again

i feel like angel enjoys tracing the grooves of your horns - it's like, really therapeutic for him

separately, sometimes angel gets really insecure and needs reassurance that what he's doing to you isn't too far because consent is key

you're fine with it, constantly reassuring him you don't mind and you actually find it kind of funny

and when you express that you find it funny because you trust him and know he wouldn't do anything to harm you, you best believe he will cry a little

only a little bit though (he cried a lot)

actively keeps you FAR away from valentino - because in a seized up state, you are undeniably vulnerable, and that momentary weakness could drag you into his line of business

absolutely adores you, coddles you, and he will protect you with newly found fierceness

you trust him and he will NEVER break that trust

HUSKER

honestly doesn't care that much

well, not at first anyways

after a while, once he realises that alastor has a sudden interest in messing with you, he becomes a little protective

and a huge worrywart, not that he shows it...

but he definitely sticks close to you throughout the day (where his job allows) and escorts you to places, hissing at passer-by's who look a little 'spooky'

another one who catches you frequently, and he also has a pillow behind the bar that he throws under your head if you go to collapse against the bar

uses your disorder to his advantage, but not often enough for it to become a predictable behaviour

IT'S NOT AS BAD AS IT SOUNDS I PROMISE

he will just do something subtle to make your muscles contract so you'll seize up if you're being difficult so he can drag you there

like refusing to go to bed

you literally stomp your hooves against the ground

like, it's bed time, go!

has fought and will continue to fight people for treating you like you're less than them because of your disorder

if you want a drink, he will stay sober - so he's in a good frame of mind you make sure you get to bed safely without head bumps and bruises at the end of it

you're your own person and allowed to do at you please, so husk doesn't baby you or limit you - but he's pretty solid for good advice, so if he advises you NOT to do something... honestly, it's a smart idea to listen

but he will help you fix your messes if you still do the thing he told you not to

because he's a softie at heart

is truly your number one protector, him and angel have a mutual understanding that they'll defend you regardless of circumstance

SIR PENTIOUS

the second most terrified of the consequences of your rough falls, just after charlie

ORDERED his eggbois to keep an eye on you, because like... what if you fell and died?

unlikely but not impossible, so every necessary action must be taken to ensure this incident does not occur!

he will be so soft spoken around you and never startles you, and is the ONLY one in the entire hotel who hasn't caused you to fall - the first time he saw it happen, he was determined to make sure it didn't happen again

i love sir pentious, please save me from this brainrot this is not okay...

he offers up his living space for you if you ever need a getaway from the others and is very pleased when you take him up on his offer

makes him feel super accomplished

also makes him feel like he's won against everyone else in the hotel

sir pentious is definitely the most 'domestic' aspect of living in the hotel, but he definitely also babies you - he'll plate up your food, fetch your belongings, get you a drink, etc. at the slightest mention of what you needed

i need a man like sir pentious

is so sweet too

if you're having a bad physical and mental day as a result of your disorder, or even for other things, he's immediately by your side - blankets and snacks in hand, and movie suggestions on the tip of his forked tongue

"ssssssshall we watch an action movie?"

he will also just hand you an eggboi to cuddle, since he himself is too shy to actually initiate a hug - so, unless you hug him first, don't expect him to do it

in this household, we LOVE sir pentious <3 and in this household, he loves you right back

#♡ jellyveesh #♡ hazbin hotel #♡ headcanons #hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel x reader #hazbin hotel x you #alastor #angel dust #charlie morningstar #sir pentious #husker #husk

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