#white is for witching: jesus christ. okay.

[waywardrose]

THROUGH A GLASS DARKLY 26

stranger things

eddie munson x reader

rated e

8.3k

spotify playlist

for @punk-in-docs​​​

fem/witch/goth!reader, sweetheart!eddie, magic, slow burn (for me), friends to lovers, angst with a happy ending, no y/n only pet names, series-typical horror, period-typical sexism and homophobia, historical inaccuracies and anachronisms, drug dealing and use, smoking, alcohol use, masturbation, mutual masturbation, fantasizing, one-bed trope, making out, fingering, dirty talk, chasing, oral sex, handjobs, condoms, piv sex, reader’s father is a dirtbag, mild spanking, magical violation, mental torture, body horror, blood, aftercare, nightmares, strict parenting, panic attack, past child abuse and abandonment, semi-public sex, break-ups, running away, guns, fist fighting, everyone survives, suicide ideation, tags will be updated as needed

Eddie would have to wait until his lunch break to see this new, hot, weird chick. He wondered which flavor of weird she was. Art weird? Theater weird? Band weird? Weird weird? He shrugged. He liked weird. In other words, you’re the new girl in town, and Eddie is intrigued.

note: Heed the tags ⬆️ and message me if you need spoilers. I don't want anyone being hurt or triggered from a fic.

26

His eyes opened to a tasteful, if dull, room. The full-length beige curtains were half-opened. Gray light dithered through the white sheers. Rain tapped on the window beyond.

The pile of pillows he reclined on smelled of detergent and his dirty hair. He suspected all the linens would have to be washed once he gathered enough strength to shower. Same with the borrowed briefs and undershirt.

Who would’ve thought he’d be wearing King Steve’s precious underwear?

He knew that was an ungenerous thought. King Steve was just Steve now. Steve had pulled him out of the Upside Down. Steve was a big damn hero.

That applied to you as well. You’d saved him twice yesterday. Most people would’ve given up after all the shit he’d put you through. They would’ve run away, and not curl on the bed next to him. With their pretty face smushed into a pillow. And they certainly wouldn’t have worn cozy pajamas and a hoodie and socks with little flowers on them.

He remembered the taste of your skin and sweat, your heady blood just below the surface. Your gasps and twists had reminded him of other, sweeter times when he had your taste on his tongue. It would’ve been so easy to feast and keep a little part of you with him forever.

Paper fluttered in the corner. He jerked his head up, regretting it right away. Muscles along his upper back strained. The top of his head tightened. He blinked a few times until the corner came into focus.

Speak — or this case, think — of the Devil… Steve sat in an armchair, a nearby lamp’s golden light accenting his perfect face. He’d propped a magazine across his crossed leg. His right arm was braced in a sling. A purple bruise haloed one of his eyes. Despite that, he had an air of strength.

Steve glanced at him, looked down, then looked up with wide eyes. He tossed the magazine on the side-table and stood.

In a hushed tone, Steve said, “Hey, man.”

“He—ey.” He cleared his throat as quietly as possible. “When you get here?”

Steve went to the nightstand, saying, “To the house? Last night.” He offered a refillable Santa Claus Land drink container. “In here? I don’t know. Maybe an hour.”

He pulled his arms from under the bedspread to take the container from Steve. The candy-cane striped crazy-straw swayed while the water inside sloshed. Steve put a hand under the container to steady it.

“Shit, thanks, man.”

“No prob.”

He swallowed a few mouthfuls of cool water before nodding that was enough. It wasn’t, but he didn’t think he could hold the container for much longer.

“How are you?” he asked before nodding at Steve’s sling. “What happened?”

“Demogorgon.”

“Jesus Christ.” He watched Steve arrange the nightstand to make it easier for him to pick up the container later. “You gonna be okay?”

“It’s just a sprain and some stitches.”

He didn’t point out Steve’s bat bites from their tour of the Upside Down. They probably matched his own.

“I guess we’ll have to give up on our dream of being bathing-suit models, huh?”

Steve chuckled and straightened to his full height.

“I’m sure tens of people will mourn the loss.”

Smirking, he said, “Don’t be so sure, big boy. You have quite the fan club.”

Steve rolled his eyes with a self-deprecating smile. It projected that good-boy ‘oh, golly gee’ quality that was the antithesis of the person he saw bite the head off a demobat and spit the blood. However, he wasn’t interested in giving Steve a pep talk right now. Steve wouldn’t want to hear it from him, anyway.

As if anyone should come to him for pep talks.

“So, uh, did you— uh…” he oh-so eloquently began. “Did you talk to her?”

Steve glanced at you sleeping on the other side of the bed — something about his eyes softened — before shaking his head.

“No, man, she’s been conked out the whole time.”

He let his head fall against the pillows. If that was the case, you hadn’t told Steve what he’d done to you. How he’d chased you and knocked you around. He’d threatened you and said all this heinous shit. God, he’d killed someone in front of you — with his teeth.

“How’s everyone else?” he asked.

Steve made a so-so face.

“Nancy and Robin are banged up, but they’ll be okay. Dustin hurt his sprained ankle some more, so he’s stuck at home.” He scratched at his jaw, humming. “Max had to have her arm reset. Lucas and Erica are the least injured, unsurprising, but the rest of the party’s in rough shape.”

“They’ll pull through?”

“Oh, yeah—”

The doorbell cut off Steve’s sentence. You jerked onto an elbow. He attempted to sit, but everything protested. He flopped back with a wince.

“Who the hell’s that?” he asked.

Steve said, “That’s probably Nance.”

“Oh, shit!” You sat and wiped the sleep from your eyes. “What time is it?”

Steve checked his wristwatch.

“4:34.”

“Shit.”

“What’s going on?” he asked.

“They’re negotiating terms, or whatever, with the government.”

“Like a ceasefire or something?”

“Something like that.”

You gave Steve an incredulous look while saying, “Yeah, something like that.” The fabric creases on your cheek from the pillowcase undermined your snark. You stood and hurried to the bedroom door. “Don’t just stand there being pretty. Answer the door. Offer drinks. Stall for time.”

Steve’s shoulders pulled back without an ounce of irony.

“Yes, ma’am.”

You left the door open and disappeared into the hallway. The thick carpet muted your retreating steps.

Eddie grinned and dragged the bedspread up his chest.

“Whipped already, Harrington?”

“Eat me, Munson.”

“You wish.” He waved his hand towards the door. “Better hop to it. You don’t want her mad.”

Steve gave him the finger as he headed for the door, but it was halfhearted.

After Steve closed the door, Eddie slumped and stared at the ceiling. There was no way anyone could hold you or the rest of the party responsible for the gates opening. That was all on Vecna, who was dead. Or at least scattered to the wind.

As he well knew, though, people needed to pin the blame on someone. It eased mass hysteria. And Hawkins did love to work itself into a tizzy. According to Erica, they’d eaten up Jason Carver’s bullshit at that town-hall meeting. The next night, the gates opened.

He asked himself who they’d blame for that.

Yeah, he thought with a snort. Him.

He wasn’t dead, but he was dead. He was screwed. He was fucked.

The police wouldn’t need to issue a man-hunt, either. It took all his energy to get up to take a piss. He was a sitting duck. A chew-toy duck. A— an… other metaphor he couldn’t think of at the moment.

Through the thin undershirt, he rubbed at a puckered scar on his side. His naked fingers felt too light. His isolated mind felt too small. There was space to think, to remember, yet too much seclusion. He shouldn’t miss the extra presence or the silent communication or the truest sense of purpose.

He thought of a cored apple. Yes, all the consumable flesh was there, but the fundamental reason for existing had been removed.

He looked at the window again, wondering if he could escape the oncoming tribunal — or reach terminal velocity before hitting the ground.

-

You spit mouthwash into the sink and splashed cold water on your face. Following that, you managed your hair and excavated the tube of concealer from your makeup bag. Beyond covering the dark circles under your eyes, it seemed pointless to gussy up.

The doorbell rang again.

You hesitated when you caught sight of the mascara. With a disgusted sound, because you didn’t have time to hem and haw, you coated your lashes.

Multiple voices resounded from the foyer below.

You tiptoed from the bathroom, yanking off your sleep clothes as you went. You threw them on the bed to redress in fresh jeans and a long-sleeved top to hide the chemical burn on your forearm.

The doorbell rang a third time.

With no time to lose, you tightened the laces of your boots and left the bedroom. From the open-gallery hallway, stilted conversation became louder. Lit lamps warmed the gray light coming through the windows. Unfortunately, it did nothing to make the atmosphere more pleasant.

A man wearing a grandpa sweater and khakis — Dr. Owens, you presumed — and a dark-haired woman in a business suit sat on one of the sofas. A high-ranking Army officer leaned on a cane by the fireplace, his right arm in a cast and sling.

Nancy sat opposite Dr. Owens, a blue binder on her lap. Steve came into the living room with two glasses of ice water and handed one to each woman. He turned to head for the kitchen and noticed you looking down.

If he noticed, the others would soon enough.

Your overworked thighs quivered as you descended the stairs. You had to maintain a grip on the handrail to keep from toppling into the foyer. Conversation ceased when you’d made it halfway.

You inhaled as you rounded the end of the stairs. You could do this. Nancy had a game plan. You would follow her lead. Her injuries took you aback, though. Her left eye was bloodshot, cheekbone bruised and swollen. A long scab ran diagonally across the side of her mouth. A choker of bruises ringed her neck. There was more damage below the collar, no doubt, but her long-sleeved blouse and slacks concealed them.

She’d sounded fine on the phone this morning. When you’d asked after her, she replied she’d heal. While that was true, you couldn’t let her leave today without doing something.

She introduced you to Dr. Owens, who stood to shake your hand. His discolored cheekbone sported a short row of stitches. He presented Agent Stinson and Lieutenant Colonel Jack Sullivan. You shook their hands before taking a seat beside Nancy.

Steve walked in then with two more glasses of ice water for Owens and Sullivan. He looked at you, raising his eyebrows in offer. You nodded with a brief grin.

As Steve headed to the kitchen once more, Owens said, “Well, I don’t know about you, but that was one of the worst Saturdays I’ve ever had.”

“That’s an understatement,” you said.

Sullivan’s sharp eyes focused on you.

“Where did you go after breaking into the Roane County coroner’s office?”

Owens aborted his reach for his glass and angled to look at Sullivan.

“Jack, I don’t think we need to start this with an interrogation.”

Sullivan regarded Owens for a moment, his expression unreadable.

Steve entered the room, disrupting the growing tension, with an ice water for you. He placed the glass on a nearby coaster on the coffee table. You murmured your thanks as he perched on the sofa’s high arm.

Nancy cleared her throat.

“This morning, you—” She looked at Owens. “—said the government owed us a debt.”

“I did.”

“We have a few objectives we think are reasonable.”

Sullivan leaned on his cane as he took a step away from the fireplace.

“Without disclosure of Eleven’s location or the return of Edward Munson’s body, I will not indulge the demands of teenagers.”

“We don’t know Eleven’s location,” said Nancy.

“She’s a weapon, trained by a rogue faction—”

Owens said, “Of this government. She’s not a threat to national security.”

“Yet she turned her powers on my men.”

“When they threatened her and her friends.” He held up his hand in concession. “Which was an unnecessary show of force on your people’s part.”

Sullivan’s lips thinned, but it barely hid his sneer.

“They’re not the enemy,” Owens said, gesturing towards your side of the living room. “They’ve agreed to meet with us. They’ve invited us into one of their homes.”

Nancy said, “El doesn’t want to hurt anyone. She never has. She’s only ever defended us.”

With a nod, you said, “She’s an American hero.”

Nancy gave you a double-take before a spirited look spread across her features.

“Yes, exactly. She was kidnapped by a rogue government agent, yes, but an American government agent, nonetheless. She operated with American interest in mind. When she escaped—”

Sullivan huffed in disbelief.

“When she escaped,” Nancy said with more force. “That government agency hunted her down, but Eleven stood up to them. She knew they were wrong. She agreed with you, Colonel Sullivan.”

He didn’t appear mollified.

Owens said, “When your forces seized the Nina headquarters, she didn’t know who you were. All she knew was that soldiers were shooting people who had helped her.”

“Who’d come together to do what, Sam? Start a new group of long-distance assassins?” Sullivan asked.

Owens sighed.

“It’s all in the logs — that you and your people have access to. Eleven is the last viable subject in Martin’s experiment.”

“Why should I believe you after you lied repeatedly?”

Stinson said, “That was at the behest of Dr. Brenner, sir.”

“Read the logs and transcripts. Watch the tapes. It’s all there,” Owens said.

“What about One, Brenner’s initial test subject, who you claim is responsible for this entire disaster? Where is he?”

You intuited from the question One meant Vecna.

It might be a mistake, but you said, “He’s dead.”

“You know this for a fact?” asked Sullivan.

“I don’t have proof, if that’s what you mean.”

“Why’s that?”

“One existed in another dimension, parallel to this one.”

Owens added, “And with all the links between the dimensions now closed, it’s impossible to confirm his death.”

“But he is dead,” you said.

Sullivan sighed, then shifted his weight. The muscles in his jaw flexed. That wasn’t only from frustration, you thought. That was from pain. You wanted to suggest he sit, but you knew he wouldn’t consider it.

“So, let’s sum up,” said Sullivan, voice tight. “Eleven remains unaccounted for and One is presumed dead. That’s all the intel you have.”

Nancy said, “Yes, sir.”

“What about Edward Munson?”

“Sir?”

“He’d been dead for almost 36 hours. Then yesterday he destroyed the coroner’s cold storage, brought down a reinforced door, killed a soldier—” He looked at you. “—and threatened her.”

You met Nancy’s eyes and gave her a minute nod before addressing Sullivan.

“He was under One’s influence the whole time. All that had been One.”

“How’s that?”

“I don’t know, sir. I’m not like One.”

His eyes narrowed.

“How are you like, then?”

Something about his phrasing had you tense and shaky. You held your body still and forced yourself to meet his gaze.

“I don’t understand.”

Maybe there was footage of you taking apart the deadbolt at the coroner’s. You hadn’t seen a camera anywhere, though.

“How did you know Munson was in the building?”

“As I said to the guards, I’d been separated from my parents. The ER told me to check at the coroner’s.”

Owens said, “Jack, she didn’t—”

Sullivan ignored him to say, “Your parents are in Cincinnati, Ohio as we speak, but I think you knew that even then.”

Your mind blanked. Joining this negotiation had been a huge mistake. You should’ve stayed upstairs with Eddie.

“This is beside the point,” Owens said, scooting to the end of the sofa. “She was there. She was trying to help.” His voice rose as he continued. “Are you going to haul her in? Because what? Because she put herself at risk? Because she’s a brave girl who wanted to find her friend?”

You swallowed around the sudden thickness in your throat and adjusted the neck of your shirt with trembling fingers.

“We owe these people our lives,” Owens said to Sullivan. “The least—” He shook his head. “The least we can do is compensate them for their sacrifice and courage.”

Sullivan and Owens stared at each other for a fraught, silent moment.

You gripped the cushion on either side of your thighs. There had to be something you could do, cast a memory spell on Sullivan or sweeten your words with magic to get him to back off — or rewind the past few minutes and, this time, keep your mouth shut.

“Debrief is tomorrow, 0800,” Sullivan said.

“We will be there,” Owens said, indicating himself and Stinson.

Sullivan scanned the room. His stony gaze lingered on you. The look said this wouldn’t be the last time you saw him. However, you wouldn’t have to be so civilized next time. Eddie would be healed — everyone would be healed — and you’d be at full power.

He drew himself up and strode from the room, his cane beating a steady rhythm.

When the front door closed behind Sullivan, you slouched into the sofa. Your shoulder bumped into Steve’s thigh. Instead of pulling away, he let you use him for support.

Nancy, Owens, and Stinson became less stiff.

Collectively, everyone sighed.

You muttered, “Jesus Christ, I need a cigarette.”

“I’m going to pretend I didn’t hear that,” Owens said, reaching for his water. “So, how about we take ten and regroup?”

You nodded and stood while Nancy agreed. Steve offered Owens and Stinson more water or a snack. Without lingering to hear their answer, you left the living room. You hauled yourself to the second floor, surprised that going up the stairs wasn’t as difficult as descending them.

Now doubly thankful you’d retrieved your car from the hospital’s parking lot last night, you fetched the pack of Djarums from your purse. Your hands quivered with the last dregs of adrenaline. You stretched your neck and shoulders to dispel the tension.

Eddie must’ve heard Owens raise his voice. You needed to check on Eddie and assure him. You hurried to Eddie’s room without trying to appear you were hurrying. Owens and Stinson sat on the sofa below, conversing in low tones. In the meantime, Nancy had disappeared. You assumed she’d gone to the kitchen with Steve.

You tapped on Eddie’s door and entered. He lay on the wedge of pillows, comforter halfway up his chest. His gaze never strayed from the window.

Closing the door, you asked, “Would you like me to open the curtains?”

“Nothing out there I need to see.”

That sounded un-Eddie-like. Not in a Vecna way, but not like the Eddie you knew.

You approached the bed.

“Are you hungry? Can I refill your drink?”

“No, thanks.”

You glanced around, trying to come up with something. Then you remembered you wanted to assure him.

“Everything’s okay down there, alright? They know everything that happened wasn’t you.”

He nodded without turning his head.

Maybe movement hurt too much.

“Would you like something for the pain?” You stepped closer. “I can get—”

“No. Thank you.”

“I have lotion we can put on the scars. If you don’t want that, I can run to the drugstore and pick up ointment or…”

He gave you the quickest of glances.

“I’m fine. I just want to sleep.”

“Right, of course.” You drew your bottom lip between your teeth. “This shouldn’t take long. Then we’ll have dinner.”

He nodded again.

“Sounds good.”

You backed away before heading to the door, because you didn’t want to bug him. He was tired and uncomfortable and had been through hell. You couldn’t expect him to return to his normal self in a matter of hours. That wasn’t fair. You weren’t your normal self right now, either.

With your hand on the doorknob, you said, “Everything’s going to be okay, I promise. We’ll fix this.”

“I know you will, sweetheart. You’re the smartest person I’ve ever met.”

Abrupt, hot tears stole any reply. Your throat clicked as you swallowed. You ducked your head and left the bedroom — even though it was the last thing you wanted to do. You couldn’t demand his attention, though. There was no time, and he needed to rest. Besides, you weren’t the one who’d been chewed on by demobats, died alone in the hospital, been taken over by a multi-dimensional psycho, and had their heart stop after pushing said psycho from their mind.

A heavy tear rolled down the outside of your cheek. You brushed it away, taking a deep breath and making your way to the stairs. Your chest felt lighter than it had in days, like that tear had unburdened you of the weight of uncertainty.

Everything was going to be fine. Sullivan had made his veiled accusations and left. Owens and Stinson seemed more accommodating. The worst part of the day was over.

Descending the stairs was still a bitch, though.

Since you doubted Steve would appreciate you smoking in his parents’ house, you’d find a dry place outside. You confirmed the plastic lighter was nestled in the pack. You probably should’ve done that before coming downstairs, but you weren’t accustomed to your legs being made of jelly.

You opened the front door, happy to see no trace of Sullivan outside. Footsteps thudded into the foyer.

As you turned, Steve asked, “Hey, mind if I join you?” holding his own pack of cigarettes.

“Of course not,” you said, wiggling your pack. “Join me in shortening our lives.”

He snorted and trotted through the doorway into the drizzle. You closed the door behind you, following him to his car parked in the enclosed carport. He half-sat on the front of the car, the toes of his sneakers a millimeter from the boundary of dry concrete. You half-sat next to him, stuck a Djarum between your lips, and lit it.

Steve shook a cigarette from the dented pack — Camels — one-handed and brought the pack to his lips. Before he could struggle with lighting the cigarette, you sparked a flame with your lighter and brought it to the tip.

Out of the corner of his mouth, he said, “Thanks.”

You shrugged in acknowledgement, inhaling spicy-sweet smoke, and stowed the lighter.

“How’s Eddie?” he asked.

“Tired. A little down, I think.”

Steve nodded.

“These are his, you know.” He showed the pack. “Don’t tell him I stole them from his vest.”

You chuckled and shook your head.

He asked, “What?”

“I see his taste has improved.”

“What do you mean?”

“He used to smoke these godawful donkey-shit cigarettes.”

Steve laughed.

“I introduced him to these,” you said, holding up the burning Djarum, “and, uh, he really liked them. I guess these spoiled the cheap ones.”

“Guess so.”

The rain pattered on the carport roof, made the tree leaves shimmy. Colors appeared richer. Shadows deepened. A gentle, low mist cocooned the house. The government-issued sedan parked nearby was glossy black, its foggy glass streaked with water.

Steve’s voice was soft when he said, “You know, I don’t usually smoke.”

You hummed for him to keep talking, then took a drag from the Djarum.

“I used to smoke more, but Nancy didn’t like it.”

You noted the past tense as you exhaled.

“You were together?”

“Yeah, before the shit hit the fan. Well, and after it — for a while. But it didn’t work out. Obviously.”

“What happened? If you don’t mind me asking.”

Smoke trailed from between his lips as he said, “A veritus wino.”

You grinned at him before ashing the Djarum away from either of your shoes.

“You mean, in vino veritas?”

He blushed.

“Uh, yeah, that.” He smoothed a thumb over the front of his eyebrow. “We were at a party and had a fight.”

“That kinda stuff happens.”

“I was a shitty boyfriend.”

“Are you still?”

“A shitty boyfriend?” He shrugged and tapped his cigarette ash towards the house. “I don’t know.”

“How about that date you had? The one Dustin mentioned. How’d that go?”

“Brenda, yeah. Eh. I don’t think that’s going to turn into anything.” “Not what you’re looking for, huh?”

You read his crooked frown easily enough. Brenda was pretty and sweet, but she couldn’t live up to some imaginary standard he’d set.

You said, “Being in a relationship’s not easy. I mean, me and Eddie aren’t perfect or anything.”

An element of irony laced his words. “Of course not.”

“We were ‘paused’ when Vecna killed Chrissy.” You finished your Djarum and stubbed it out on the sole of your boot. “Actually, we’d been paused since Christmas.”

“What? Why?”

“Stuff with his music writing and the band and some competition that doesn’t matter anymore. Because who knows if there’s a band at all after all this.”

You didn’t know if any of Eddie’s guitars — or amps or written songs — had survived the fissure opening, either. No wonder he was so dispirited. You would be, too. He loved that red guitar. If none of them had made it, he couldn’t be the lead guitarist for Corroded Coffin — or any other band.

Steve said, “But you came for him.”

“Of course I did.”

The front door jerked open.

You startled to the side, breath catching and making you cough. Steve’s shoulders tensed as he straightened.

Nancy stuck her head out.

“Hey, it’s been more than ten minutes.”

Patting your chest and swallowing, you said, “We’re coming.”

Steve took a last puff on his cigarette and ground it out on the concrete. Nancy ducked inside, leaving the door ajar. You left the Djarums on the foyer table and detoured to the first-floor powder room to throw the cigarette butt in the toilet. Steve followed and handed over his cigarette butt when you held out your palm. You flushed the toilet and went to the living room where Nancy, Owens, and Stinson waited.

You returned to your spot on the sofa and drank from your untouched glass. Steve sat on Nancy’s other side as she opened her binder. She’d listed the objectives you two had discussed on the phone this morning in neat bullet points.

She cleared her throat and looked to Owens, who gave her an encouraging nod.

“We’re all ears,” he said.

With a deep breath, she began listing the objectives:

“Party members’ healthcare costs, including delayed and/or ongoing care, are paid in full until each respective member is fully recovered according to them and their doctor of choice.

“Repair to damaged property by the craftsmen of the member’s choosing is paid in full by May 30, 1986.

“Property that is damaged beyond repair, according to craftsmen of the member’s choosing, is to be replaced, with member approval, and paid in full by May 30, 1986.

“All hotel or motel bookings, along with food and meals for members and their families while repairs or replacements of property are taking place, will be paid in full.

“Any official documents pertaining to Edward Munson’s death will be expunged from public record by March 31, 1986.

“Any official documents pertaining to James Hopper Jr.’s death will be expunged from public record by March 31, 1986.

“Edward Munson’s name will be cleared of any wrong-doing by April 6, 1986.

“Edward Munson’s innocence, with accusations retracted, will be made public in the newspapers and broadcasts that previously named him as a suspect by April 6, 1986.”

She turned the page and continued reading.

“All surviving seniors at Hawkins High School, regardless of standing or further attendance, are to officially graduate with creditable transcripts and receive official diplomas before May 22, 1986.

“Jonathan Byers and Argyle Franco are to officially graduate with creditable transcripts and receive official diplomas from Lenora Hills High School before May 22, 1986.

“All adult party members will be given a yearly net stipend of $30,000 for four years, starting April 30, 1986.

“All underage party members upon high-school graduation will be granted funds to obtain a degree from an accredited post-secondary institution of higher learning, both being of the respective member’s choosing, until said degree is earned — with option for post-graduate education.

“Upon request and with no time limit, all adult party members will be granted funds to obtain a degree from an accredited post-secondary institution of higher learning, both being of the respective member’s choosing, until said degree is earned — with option for post-graduate education.

“Jane Hopper is not to be contacted, approached, or tracked by any country’s government agency, or persons or organizations working on any government’s behalf.

“All other party members are not to be approached or tracked by any country’s government agency, or persons or organizations working on any government’s behalf.”

Owens’s face went through understanding, even nodding along, to surprise, then wide-eyed disbelief. You understood his shock. However, Nancy and you agreed if the party didn’t ask, the party would never receive.

After a pregnant pause, Owens said, “That’s a long list there.” He held out his hand. “May I see?”

Nancy opened the binder rings, freed the pages, and handed them to Owens. Steve met your eyes over her back. His astonished expression had you raising your eyebrows at him. He covered it by going to the fireplace to retrieve Sullivan’s undrunk water.

“Alrighty, let’s see…” Owens bobbed his head in thought. “Most of these things I can have happen. The timeframe you ladies have given is going to be a challenge.”

Luckily, she’d written a second copy. Scanning it, you checked the dates. They didn’t seem unreasonable to you.

Nancy asked, “What can’t you have happen, Dr. Owens?”

“That stipend, for one.” He frowned. “The college education for the adults will be a hard sell.”

You asked, “No disrespect here, Doctor, but how much are our lives worth? All of us?”

Nancy nodded, and said, “Yours? Agent Stinson’s? Colonel Sullivan and his men? All our families? Hawkins?”

Stinson glanced at Owens, her stoic face tempered into a question.

He met her gaze with a sigh.

“Tuition can be funneled through the Pell Grant program. We can flag their Social Security numbers for full funding.”

“All they’d have to do is apply for the next school year,” Stinson said.

Owens grunted in agreement before saying, “That stipend, though…”

Steve said, “We deserve that, because some of us lost everything.”

Nancy bent her head, knuckles turning white as they held the edges of the binder.

You glanced at her, then at Steve, who said:

“A government agency destroyed our town and killed our friends.”

“We wouldn’t have gone through any of this,” Nancy said and lifted her head, eyes red-rimmed. “If it hadn’t been for Hawkins National Laboratory.”

Steve added, “And the Russians.”

Owens tilted his head in silent concession.

“The higher-ups will want signed NDAs from each of you regardless if they agree to these terms.”

“I won’t sign an NDA unless these terms are met — in full,” you said.

“That’s a dangerous game to play,” Stinson said, not unkindly.

“What can they do to me that Henry Creel hasn’t already done?”

That fuckface. He’d tortured you, stolen a vital part of you, and murdered you. He’d tried to turn Eddie against you. He’d tried to invade this dimension and exterminate human life.

Perhaps you hadn’t stopped Vecna alone. Actually, you were certain you hadn’t. Yet you’d survived him, and you’d survive whatever mundane crap the government could throw at you.

Owens frowned and waved a placating hand.

“There’ll be no need for that.” To Stinson, he asked, “Money channeled through SSA?”

She shrugged a shoulder with a considering look.

“FEMA?”

He grunted at the possibility.

To you, Nancy, and Steve, he said, “You’ve given me quite the to-do list,” and stood.

Stinson rose to her feet and stepped out of the way for Owens to pass.

“We’ll be in touch,” he said with a wry look and a flourish of papers. Nancy snapped the binder’s rings closed as Owens and Stinson left the house. Exhaling, she placed the binder on the coffee table.

“You didn’t need to stick your neck out like that,” she said to you.

“Maybe. Maybe not. But I did.” You studied the side of her bruised face. “Someone had to force their hand.”

“When do you think we’ll hear from them?” Steve asked.

Nancy said, “Hopefully, tomorrow.”

Steve nodded.

“Well… I’m gonna start on dinner.” To Nancy, he asked, “You want to stay?”

Her knitted brow, paired with the slight tilt of her head, said she wanted to refuse, but didn’t know a polite way of doing so.

Before she replied, you said, “Stay. I can heal you after.”

“Like cast a spell?”

“Yup, I did it for Lucas before Vecna tried to invade.” You pointed at your unblemished jaw. “Jason Carver punched me here.”

Her eyes widened.

“Yeah, sure, okay.” She turned to Steve. “Can you make dinner one-handed?”

“I can make a better one with more hands.”

Now you felt like an asshole for not offering to heal Steve earlier.

“Wait,” you said to Steve. “I can heal you, but I…” You looked away as you gauged your strength. “I don’t know if I can heal you both.”

You concluded you weren’t quite rested enough to do that. Especially considering Nancy’s numerous bruises, and Steve’s arm was sprained and cut to ribbons.

Steve dismissed the offer with a raspberry. “Do me tomorrow.”

As if that wasn’t a loaded statement. You grinned at him, eyebrow quirked.

His cheeks flared red.

“I’m going to the kitchen now.”

He marched from the living room, half-full glass in hand.

Nancy cleared her throat and took a sip of water, though neither disguised her amusement. She shared an entertained look with you before standing.

“I’m going to check on Eddie,” you said. “Then I’ll be down to help.”

She said, “Okay,” before heading to the kitchen.

You grabbed your Djarums on the way upstairs and tucked them in your purse when in your room. While there, you swiped your lotion from the bathroom counter. Eddie hadn’t said he didn’t want it. He’d said he wanted to rest. Also, he needed to keep those scars moisturized while his skin acclimated to them.

You went to his room and knocked on the door. Once again, he didn’t answer. You didn’t want to disturb him, but dinner was soon.

You cracked open the door to peek inside. His bed was empty, the comforter pushed down the mattress. He couldn’t have left. Everyone would’ve noticed him leaving his room. The only way he could’ve snuck out was by the window. You rushed to it and threw back the sheers. It was locked.

The en-suite bathroom door clicked open. You spun on your heel. Steam billowed from the doorway.

Eddie stood in the bright bathroom, a towel cuffed around his hips. Of course, he hadn’t left.

His wet curls had been pushed away from his face. Steam covered his flushed chest to highlight the soft cut of his muscles and new scars. The damp towel clung to his thighs.

Your face heated and mouth watered. You couldn’t recall why you’d come to his room.

“Hi,” you breathed. “Sorry for barging in.”

He turned his back to you and asked, “What is it?”

You admired his tapering torso. A bead of water rolled down the valley of his spine. You wanted to lick it up and press yourself against his back. You wanted to wrap your arms around his waist and kiss his shoulder.

“I—uh… I—” You swallowed and looked down, gaze catching on the bottle of lotion. “Lotion!”

He flapped a fresh t-shirt open and tugged it over his head.

You said, “I brought you lotion. I thought it would help. It’s really gentle…” You trailed off as he shoved his arms through the arm-holes and left the bathroom. “…stuff.”

You presented the bottle to him.

He grimaced, fighting with the clinging t-shirt.

“Thanks,” he said without looking at the bottle.

You stepped around the bed.

“Want some help?”

“No, thank you.”

You nodded to yourself. It had been wrong to intrude. Not as though you hadn’t seen him like this before, but he’d been through so much. He must still need time to adjust — or, you know, have his privacy.

“Steve and Nancy are making dinner.” You set the bottle on the side-table next to the armchair. “Should be ready soon.”

He sat on the end of the bed, t-shirt covering his upper body. The towel’s overlap split up his thigh. You forced your eyes to look anywhere but there, like an old-timey gentleman seeing a lady’s well-turned ankle for the first time.

“Cool, I’ll be down in a bit,” he said.

You gave yourself a mental shake.

“Yeah, of course.” You pasted on a grin, though he didn’t reciprocate. “What would you like to drink?”

“Beer, please.”

“I’ll see if there’s any.”

“Thanks.”

You retreated from the room, closing the door after yourself.

Yeah, you thought sarcastically, that had gone well.

-

Yeah, he thought sarcastically, that had been a normal interaction for two people in love.

Jesus Christ, what the hell was wrong with him?

He glanced under his t-shirt. That was what was wrong with him. He was scarred to shit. He could say with confidence he’d never been an Adonis. He’d been okay. Attractive enough. All his features were in the right places. Now, though. Shit, now big patches of his skin looked like pink melted wax. He even had a bite scar under his jaw. His tattoos were half-eaten or distorted. Part of his left nipple was gone.

It was a freak show below the neck. Actually, no, that wasn’t true. He had a scar on his neck, too.

He touched its faint ripples.

He’d never been vain. Or he’d never considered himself vain. He liked his long hair and his tats. He was thankful he’d never had bad acne. His dick worked. His teeth were good. However, he never realized how much he relied on those things for confidence.

With one thing taken away — skin ruined and too-tight from sudden scarring — he’d been thrown out of whack. He didn’t blame you, of course. He had scars instead of bleeding out in the middle of the goddamn woods because of you. He’d gotten himself chewed on because he wanted to be a hero, as if he were a paladin in one of his campaigns.

Now he knew taking a critical hit in real life sucked.

With a sigh, he peeled off the damp shirt and tossed it on the bed. He should take your advice about the lotion. If nothing else, it would make his skin feel less stretched.

He took the lotion to the bathroom, stripped, and squeezed a huge dollop in his palm. It smelled nice, smelled like you. He smeared it across each patch on his torso, his legs, his arms, his neck, his jaw. While the lotion didn’t sting, the scars didn’t like the rubbing. He took to patting the lotion in, like handling a healing tattoo.

Once finished, he rinsed his hands. His skin did feel better. The scars appeared less pink and lumpy, but maybe that was his imagination.

He eased his clothes — Steve’s clothes — around the tacky patches of lotioned scars. The cotton sleep-pants and thin t-shirt grazed his tender skin in cool caresses. Compared to before the shower, when every irritated inch of him was raw, this feeling was a small delight.

After turning off the lights, he left his room. Multiple voices in good spirits grew louder as he approached the kitchen. The deep scent of cooking meat made his mouth water for the first time since becoming something like himself again.

He stopped in the kitchen doorway, his feet feeling bound to the floor. You stood at the island, cutting washed potatoes into bite-sized chunks and dropping them into a bowl with herbs and oil. The domestic tableau warmed him, yet left him separate. Beside the sink, Steve dusted seasoning into a bowl of trimmed green beans while Nancy stirred. Eddie remained out of frame — an observing audience.

“—shoulda seen that gorgeous car,” Steve said wistfully.

“It was not gorgeous after you were done with it,” said Nancy.

“Yeah, well, Billy deserved it.”

With a grin, you said, “Wrecking a Cadillac and a Camaro in one night hurts my heart.”

Eddie didn’t know how to join. He’d gotten in the way when his parents had been together. Dad had never bothered with complicated meals after Momma left. He’d prepared meals — even for the holidays — with Wayne. Though typically, it had been Wayne managing the big stuff with him following directions. However, this scene was so far out of his wheelhouse it was laughable.

You looked from your task, knife resting on the cutting board, to discover him lingering in the doorway. You smiled at him, bright as the sun.

“Hey!”

He couldn’t stare too long for fear of going blind.

Nancy and Steve turned to him. Her injured face hurled him from his own thoughts, got him out of his head. He was healed. Nancy and Steve weren’t. He was mildly uncomfortable. They were most likely aching and sore.

“Hey, didn’t mean to intrude.”

“No, man,” said Steve, waving a tin of black pepper. “Come on in.”

You wiped your hands on a kitchen towel as he approached the island. You pulled a bottle of Miller from the fridge, placed the underside of the cap on the counter, and knocked it off.

“Learned how to do that a couple months ago,” you said while handing him the bottle.

“Nice technique.”

“Thanks.”

“So, what’s for dinner?” he asked the room before taking a long pull from the bottle.

Steve said, “Meatloaf, potatoes, and green beans.”

He muffled a burp.

“Smells good.”

“I’m almost done with the potatoes.” To him, you asked, “Would you stir for me?”

“Sure! Yeah.”

He scuttled to your side, placing the beer out of harm’s way, and stirred to coat the potatoes as you cut the last one. When they were coated to your satisfaction, you tipped the bowl onto a baking sheet and spread the potato chunks. You then slid the baking sheet into the top oven below a loaf pan.

Nancy said, “Okay, thirty minutes on the clock,” and set a kitchen timer.

“Longest thirty minutes of my life,” he said and took another drink of beer.

Steve scoffed. “You say that now, but I’ve only tried this recipe, like, once before. And I didn’t do much this time.” He waggled his slinged arm.

In a tease, Nancy said, “Aw, you got out the ingredients and held the recipe card for me.”

“Ha ha, you’re welcome.”

Steve’s dark eyes twinkled like a fucking Disney princess’s.

You met his gaze with a pleased, conspiratorial look. Maybe Steve could win Nancy back after all and fulfill that dream of six nuggets in a Winnebago. Eddie guessed it all depended on Byers’s next move. Of course, there was the whole “noble hero injured for family” card that either guy could play.

The front door banged open. You grabbed the knife from the island. Steve took a step around Nancy, who found the used kitchen shears lying near the sink.

A distressed female voice called, “Steve?”

Steve’s shoulders dropped before he jogged out of the kitchen.

“Robin?”

Nancy relaxed and slid the shears back to the sink.

Sneakers squeaked. The front door shut.

“Steve, oh my God!”

With a long exhale, you eased the knife onto the cutting board.

The thought of you willing to slice and dice anyone who invaded the house was hot. He drank more beer as the image of your pretty face splattered with blood flashed across the movie screen of his mind. He’d lick it off and french you so hard.

Certain the thought telegraphed over his face, he hid it with a frown aimed at the front door.

Nancy left the kitchen. You followed a step behind. Not wanting to miss out, he left his beer to bring up the rear.

Steve’s soft ‘whoa’ drifted from the foyer.

Robin, soaked from the steady rain, had wrapped her arms behind Steve’s neck. Steve had hooked his good arm around her back. With her face hidden between her arm and his throat, it was impossible to tell if she was heaving for breath or crying.

“What’s wrong?” Steve asked.

She mumbled something too low for anyone besides Steve to hear.

“It’s okay.”

Robin lifted her head, rain and tears spilling down her face. Scratches marred her cheek, along with a violet bruise on her chin.

“They’re leaving, and they want me to go, but I don’t want to, and I didn’t know where else to go, so I came here, and I don’t know what to do.” She sniveled. “I don’t know what to do.”

“Okay, slow down.” Steve tightened his hold. “It’s your parents?”

She nodded and tucked her chin.

He said, “It’s okay, you don’t have to go.”

“But they’ll make me leave with them.”

“Not if they don’t know you’re here,” you said.

“How did you get here?” asked Eddie, thinking maybe she’d left her car in the driveway where anyone could see.

“On my bike.” She said to Steve, “I put it in the carport. I don’t think I scratched your car. I tried to be careful.”

He shook his head.

“Doesn’t matter.”

Nancy said, “You don’t have to go back. You can call them tomorrow and borrow some of my clothes in the meantime.”

Robin looked at her for a second before giggling. Her face scrunched. Her giggles muted. A blush crept up her throat and cheeks. She held onto Steve's shoulders, continuing to giggle and drip rain on the floor.

“Fine, but I’m not wearing your bra again!”

Nancy laughed with her, paused with a pained ‘oh’ and held her cheek, but still smiled.

Once Robin was calm, in dry clothes, and her hair wrapped in a towel, she settled in the dimming sunroom and shared the tale of visiting Victor Creel. Nancy filled in the gaps while Steve liberated a few bottles of wine from the collection in the basement. You barely glanced away from Robin or Nancy, even when Steve handed you a glass of wine.

Eddie watched from the doorway, nursing his beer and forcing himself not to stare at you. He wanted to join you where you sat in an armless chair. Better yet, have you sit on his lap. Then he thought about you feeling his scars or nudging a tender one by accident. It would become this brouhaha, where you’d feel guilty and he’d be more self-conscious.

God, what a mess.

He hadn’t been that close to you since before… everything. Could he handle the delicious scent of you and not want to bite? His grip tightened around the bottle. He didn’t know if he actually craved that or if it was a lingering urge from during… his time being undead. He swallowed. Did something get fucked up in his head so the carnal was tied to the need to devour? Was consuming the same as consummation? Were you in danger every second you were alone with him?

He realized these were very normal questions that very normal people asked themselves on very normal Sunday evenings.

The oven timer buzzed. He backed away to pull pans from the oven for Steve, who assessed the meatloaf was done, but the potatoes needed more time. Eddie set the timer as Steve drizzled a few tablespoons of water in a preheated skillet for the green beans.

“Where’d you learn to do this?” he asked.

Steve poured the green beans into the skillet. The aroma of onion and pepper bloomed with the distinct green scent of vegetables.

“Cooking shows, mostly. My mother is a decent cook, but she doesn’t like anyone in the kitchen with her.”

He hummed as he poked at the steaming meatloaf with a serving fork. If he wouldn’t burn the shit out of himself, he’d grab handfuls and shove them in his mouth.

Steve elbowed him away with a smug grin.

“Dude, it’s gotta rest for a few before it can come out of the pan.”

He groaned, then finished his beer. It was flat, but whatever.

As he stirred the green beans, Steve said, “Hey, you can tell me to fuck off or whatever—”

“Oh, this sounds serious.”

“Shut up. If you two are together—” He nodded towards the sunroom to indicate he meant you. “—and you’re serious and shit, why aren’t you staying in her room?”

“It was her idea,” he lied.

Steve leveled a look at him.

Though Steve hadn’t been home at the time, he must’ve figured out you’d offered to share your bed — and you had. Eddie made a case for him stinking and being exhausted and not wanting to pollute your bed. You’d given him a commiserative look and set him up in the bedroom down the hall. Shit, you were way too good for him. Later, you’d brought him fresh clothes and spare toiletries.

Low enough his voice wouldn’t carry into the sunroom, Steve said, “You keep this crap up, man, you’re going to lose her.”

He pulled another beer from the fridge to buy himself time to think. It would be ridiculous to discuss his love life with fucking Steve Harrington. Steve was one to talk, anyway. The entire school had known Steve’s longest relationship was with Nancy Wheeler, and that remained true to this day.

He found the bottle-opener in the silverware drawer, popped the cap off the bottle, and leaned a hip on the counter near Steve.

Putting a lazy nonchalance in his movements, he took a swig of beer and half-asked, “Oh, Harrington, you tryin’ to steal my lady?”

“No, but someone will if you’re not careful,” Steve said without sparing him a glance.

#eddie munson x reader #eddie munson x y/n #eddie munson x you #eddie munson #stranger things #em tagd #waywardrose writes

[theminimani]

Okay so from what I've seen in day 5 :

-Espresso cookie stayed in the vanilla Kingdom and work now with strawberry crepe (he'll adopt them later and marry Madeleine /hj)

-Polyancient stuff (very yummy)

-Clotted cream will not take another break soon

-Custard ran away. This little sh¡t. I hope he'll get soggy and die.

-Mille-feuille and the white masked cookies escaped and according to Financier, that would be a god who helped and maybe, in the very far future, we will finally get to meet the witches.

-Golden cheese is mentioned. I hope that there would be an episode 15 and/or 16 for her even tho I'm pretty sure it will be impossible but oh well.

But what I wanted to see more :

-More screentime with Light cream and more knowledge about her (what is her reaction toward custard leaving the Republic, clotted cream leading an army ect)

-More of seaweed cookie (poor girl. She know that Espresso will not visit her often but she doesn't know that he will not come back anymore :( )

-More wildchip content. The nation is hungry. /j

-More of Madeleine's family lore (apparently their houses isn't the great and if there was a problem, Grand madeleine cookie said THEY could take care of it. Not SHE. THEY. I hope I'll see more of them soon tho)

That's all I have to say for day 5 and I'm glad it was short because JESUS CHRIST that whole chain of uptade around the cookie odyssey was HUGE

#cookie run kingdom #cookie run #clotted cream cookie #crunchy chip cookie #wildberry cookie #custard cookie #wildchip #dark cacao cookie #light cream cookie #pure vanilla cookie #hollyberry cookie #polyancients #seaweed cookie #mille feuille cookie #golden cheese cookie

[unsleepingtales]

Neverafter FINALE reactions! Strap in this is a long one.

I AM in fact looking for the Calvin and Hobbes comic books.

Death is hungry for everyone but Timothy 😢

Also can we think about how in AP Brennan said that there’s like one more level of fucked up Tim can get. Can we think about that please.

I love Tim and Baba Yaga interactions

We can still be married and about to be divorced and be friends. Cmon guys.

YLFA

I don’t know what your journey has been!

Mr steal ur girl

Shenanigans? Spare shenanigans sir?

Are you a scorpion or are you a cat? Keep it simpleeee

PREPPED ANIMATED BOOK MINIS Rick ily

Pinocchio wielding faerie magic is so wild

Flat William????? He needs lore.

Oh yeah tossing a cat a firework and saying Get up to something! Cannot possibly go wrong right? Right.

Everyone’s laughing at Pinocchio but he wants an older sister SO much.

Brennan is having so much fun as the baba yaga and it’s great to watch. PUT YOU IN THE SOUP.

INK HAND INK HAND INK HAND

This shit deals necrotic???? I wonder if it did necrotic before Snow White got involved…

Brennan’s face. You want the bird to fire the rocket? [cricket fired a rocket] Cricket was Brilliant. [the bird can speak]

Starts playing the fucking bird. Named beaky. Brennan let me get coffee with you I am begging.

Having a normal one here at dimension20

If you ask me for a stealth roll, you will find out.

You fucked around? You will find out.

Go ahead and roll your stealth roll *sweating buckets*

Also quick shoutout to Brennan for beating the only owning one shirt allegations that white henley fits Nicely.

The faerie is DEAD?

Jesus h christ

Ok shenanigans was fun back to what the fuck.

Never mind I guess we’re writing our own fables yall remember the famous story about the scorpionshark and the rabbit

It really wants to make Aesop proud???

I need to understand Cinderella’s mind

Strong con from my pond hopping princess 💚

Elody marry me please

Don’t look away from me. You see what happens?

Pretty reasonable compared to pibs turn right.

Scheherazade ily

Ngl forgot flat william existed oops

Horrifying! Horrifying.

I love dnd set design. I need to intern for the d20 design team next summer or something.

Turquina actually loves Pinocchio

Baba yaga flirting with Aesop?????

OCD BOYFRIEND ADD GIRLFRIEND TO DESCRIBE BABA YAGA X AESOP TOP FIVE MOST INSANE THINGS SIOBHAN THOMPSON HAS EVER SAID

Gerard just flat out defeating people is what he deserves. Fucked up Murph character my goddamn beloved.

WHAT

OKAY

Minerva’s here everyone!

Fuck your ass - and then beaky dies. Rip to a legend.

Elody looking out for Gerard <3

Zac is fully dead

I’m gonna leave if she does this. Murph is gonna leave his wife.

INSANE

ON AN ORANGE D8

WHAT

LEAVE YOUR TOP HAT

WHAT THE FUCK

Against the laws of god and man. In defiance of destiny. You get a cool orange hat.

Siobhan quietly going “shut the fuck up” to Ally

I feel insane.

Hat. On the mini. Zac quit but at least Death has a cool orange hat. We’ve gone full goofy movie but y’know. Death’s soul is gonna have a hat on when it’s violently ripped from her body.

Jesus christ Siobhan.

STEPMOTHER TOOK THE FUCKING BABA YAGA

What the fuck

Disadvantage for the rest of the fight?????

ZAC

ZAAAAC

INSANE INSANE I AM INSANE A CAT IS KILLING A GOD

Ok so when you hurt the hand. Ink goes places.

Alexa play everything ends from a very potter senior year

Shark! With me!

This feels like animal cruelty

TIM

Red ily so much you’re so cool

Rip flat William you were a real one

GERARD NO

Gerard. My love.

Spell time spell time spell time oh god oh fuck

GANDER MINI OH SHIT

Gem time?

Oh god oh fuck

Seven chances to roll

Oh my god.

YES ON THE FOURTH ROLL oh my GOD

The little hat label

RICK SIGHTING

Oh my god. Oh my god.

You’re christ, Tim!

Brennan has so much fun with his little effects board

Baba Yaga and Pib aaaaaaaaaaa a witch and a cat

ZAC

Baba yaga and Pib duo I never knew I needed

SEE YOU IN THE STORIES BRENNAN?

Cmon gerard 😢

DEATH HAS A LITTLE ORANGE HAT

ROSAMUND AND THE LITTLE GIRL LEFT AFTER DEATH MOVES PAST HER

Cinderella and Rosamund protecting Little Red. Elody and Gerard loving each other and accepting death.

Minerva and Pinocchio weirdly soft moment? Ok? Sure? Love that for them!

Village of Hapley. Crying.

Rosamund learning how to spin wool is actually so good

Brennan being visibly legitimately moved by their character choices!

Gander redemption <3

Oh my god. A real 21 year old boy has no right to make me emotional??

The meta in ‘I could have sounded like this the whole time’

I love Zac and Zac’s choices. The trickster prince!

Gerard my fucking beloved. Gerard of greenleigh I love you and I need you to be okay.

Snow White being okay!

Emily desperately wanted ylfa to be friends with baba yaga and she got it!!

Murph on the edge of the frame just Losing It

YLFA CRUSH ON PINOCCHIO

They play gin rummy together. They’re 21. They’ve saved the world together. The god of death approves. They live happily. Oh my god.

Emily sliding that in in the last ninety seconds of the season. Incredible.

Death with an orange hat and a rucksack walking on two feet into the sunset. Oh my god.

That’s all, folks! Incredible season <3

I really and truly don’t know how to sum up what this story meant to me. Thank you to our storytellers.

#neverafter #verbal component #reactions

[olddirtybadfic]

The Sad Saga of James Morgan and Company: The First of the Ill-Fated OCs

I made practically a whole boy band of original characters for James to fall in love with. They will, of course, all end up in Jessiebelle's fridge as angst fodder. I'd jokingly say, "Original Character: do not steal," but there's barely anything there to steal.

This fic contains: Colorful language; general angst; possible out-of-character moments for Jessie, James, and Meowth; definite out-of-character moments for Ash (he's kind of ableist holy crap); violence; convoluted occult lore; blood; underdeveloped original character; murderous, occult-powered Jessiebelle; attempted murder/human sacrifice; Meowth gets weirdly descriptive about death; character (Pokémon) death and resurrection; ellipses abuse; Jesus Hades Christ eleven!me tortured James a lot in fic (you always hurt the ones you love i guess)

-O-o-O-o-O-

*Imagine Team Rocket is just walking, minding their own business, until Jessiebelle kidnaps James again. Jessie and Meowth follow her.

Jessiebelle: You stupid, stupid little strumpet. Why do you even try to run from me? You know resistance is futile. You can't run and you can't hide. James: If I can't hide, how come it takes you so long to find me? Jessiebelle: Well, you can hide, but not for long.

*Jessiebelle sprays a potion on James. He falls to the ground, writhing in pain.

James: What is that stuff? Jessiebelle: It's a special potion for disobedient witches.

*James faints. Jessie and Meowth jump in the window.

Jessiebelle: Why must you break my windows? In fact, why must you ruin my plans of sacrificing your friend? Jessie: Unlike you, we don't want to control him.

*Jessiebelle's guard, a boy with green hair and green eyes, walks in.

Guard: Did you kill him?! Jessiebelle: No, but I'm going to. Guard: (looks at James) Don't kill him. Jessiebelle: And why shouldn't I kill him? He's evil, you know. Guard: He's not evil. In fact, I don't think he could be a bad guy.

*While Jessiebelle and her guard are arguing, Jessie and Meowth take James out of there.

Meowth: Wake up, James!

*Meowth starts gently patting James's cheek. James wakes up.

James: What happened? Meowth: You were poisoned by that crazy bitch Jessiebelle. James: It wouldn't be the first time. (winces)

*James takes out a vial of reddish-brown liquid. He turns pale while drinking it and clearly is not enjoying it.

Meowth: What is that stuff? James: (coughs) It's Jigglypuff blood, not taken violently. It's supposed to be an antidote. (doubles over, tries not to vomit)

Meowth: Feel any better? James: Not right away.

*Later that day, James's powers are going insane, which seems to drive him crazy.

James: (softly) I hate her. Meowth: What? James: (louder) I hate her. Jessie: What's the matter? James: I hate her! I hate her! I HATE HER! Meowth: Calm down. Who do you hate? James: I hate that crazy bitch! Jessie: You mean Jessiebelle. James: Yes.

*No one speaks until the next day because of that violent outburst James had. Ash comes across Team Rocket.

Ash: It's Team Rocket! What trick do you have up your sleeves now? Jessie: Just piss off, twerp.

*James is standing with his head down. All he can think about is how he hates Jessiebelle.

James: I hate her. Meowth: Uh-oh. Jessie: Not this shit again. Ash: What?! James: I hate her. Ash: What the hell are you talking about?! James: (screaming) I hate that crazy bitch Jessiebelle! Ash: (backing away) Are you sure you're not the crazy bitch? James: How do you think you'd act if someone wanted to sacrifice you?! Ash: Okay, call the guys in white coats. James: (hisses) I don't need them. I'm not a crazy bitch, I'm a sane witch! Ash: Right now, you sound like a cat. Meowth: Hey! I resemble that remark! Ash: Whatever drugs you're on, I'm gonna just say no. James: I am not on drugs! You're full of shit, you little twerpy bastard! Shut the hell up! Ash: (dubiously) Right.

*Jessie pulls James back and dumps a vial of green potion on his head. James blinks, then seems to snap out of a trance.

James: What was I saying? Ash: That you're not a crackhead? Meowth: Let's just get outta here.

*Jessie and Meowth lead James away to find a place to camp. When they find a good spot, Meowth makes James lie down.

Meowth: After that outburst, you should probably rest. James: What did I do and why don't I remember anything? Meowth: Let's just say you got a little bit mad.

*James sighs. This was clearly the work of Jessiebelle's dark magic.

-O-o-O-

*Imagine Jessiebelle traps Jessie, James, and Meowth in a cage. She decides to leave them there for a while.

*They're clawing and trying to batter their way out. Jessiebelle ignores them.

Jessie: This isn't working. We're going to have to try and get the keys. James: I don't think we'll ever get out. She wants to leave us in here until we beg to die. Meowth: I think all our skin will rot away and our organs will dry up and our blood will evaporate before we beg for death. I'd rather have my brain disintegrate than beg to die.

*They're in different cages. Jessie is in one cage while James and Meowth are in a second cage.

Meowth: I'm not going to beg to die. James: Neither will I. Jessie: I definitely won't.

*Jessiebelle comes back in.

Meowth: Ya hear that? You're not gonna win this! Jessiebelle: Shut up, hell cat! (kicks Meowth, knocking him out) Don't tell me what I will and won't do. Damn you! James: (crawls over to Meowth) What have you done to him?! (holds Meowth)

*Jessiebelle leaves. James tries to nurse Meowth back to health magically. Jessiebelle comes back in and sees James holding Meowth with tears streaming down his cheeks.

James: You killed him. Jessiebelle: No, I didn't.

*James's eyes start glowing ominously. He's got a dark look on his face. But for a second, he looks hurt.

Jessiebelle: I wouldn't do that if I were you. This cage is witchcraft-proof. (to her guard) Tylas, watch these three. See that they don't escape. And keep a very watchful eye on that boy. (walks away)

*Tylas watches them. James is still crying silently.

Tylas: Why are you crying? James: Meowth is going to die. I hate Jessiebelle. Tylas: To tell you the truth, I don't really like her either.

*James and Tylas look in each other's eyes.

Tylas: What's wrong? James: (seems to snap out of a trance) Nothing. (sighs sadly) Maybe she didn't kill him. If you kill a Pokémon out of spite, you get cursed.

*James puts his ear to Meowth's heart. His eyes glaze over. His face gets really pale. He cries out.

Tylas: What's wrong? James: (sobbing) She killed him. Jessie: She killed Meowth?! James: Yes. (sobs) Jessiebelle: What's all this noise about? James: You know damn well what it's about. Jessiebelle: True, but I want to see if I'm right. James: You killed Meowth. Jessiebelle: I was right. (walks out again) Jessie: James, couldn't you use that life potion on Meowth? James: I didn't think of that.

*James sprays the life potion on Meowth. They don't even need to do the whole routine with the sacrifices this time. Meowth comes back to life.

Meowth: I'm alive again. James: I'm so glad you're alive. Jessie: So am I. Tylas: I'm glad, too.

*They manage to escape.

Jessiebelle: How could you let them escape?! Tylas: I don't know. I was hiding the key. Jessiebelle: There's always tomorrow.

*Meanwhile, Jessie, James, and Meowth are in the forest, looking for a place to camp out.

Jessie: I think it was really strange that Tylas was glad Meowth was alive. James: He said he didn't like Jessiebelle that much. Meowth: It was nice of him to help us escape. Jessie: Definitely. Don't you think so, James?

*James doesn't answer. He's staring into space.

Meowth: Hello? Anybody home?

*Jessie waves her hand in James's face.

James: What? What were we talking about? Jessie: We were talking about how it was nice of Tylas to help us escape. James: Oh, yeah. Him. (sighs) Meowth: Why do you keep daydreaming when we talk about him? (figures it out) Hey, I know why! James: What? Jessie: I think you're in love with Tylas. James: (blushes) I'm not. I just….like him a lot. Meowth: That's love.

*James thinks about this for a while.

James: Okay. So Maybe I'm in love with Tylas. Meowth: Then I'll go tell him. James: Wait! Come back here!

*James chases after Meowth. They eventually find a place to camp out.

-O-o-O-o-O-

Moral of the story: If you kill a Pokémon out of spite, you get cursed. This story must be a Poké serial killer, then.

#old fic #pokemon fanfiction #james team rocket #meowth team rocket #jessie team rocket #dark fic #tw whump #scriptfic #pokemon au #witch au #pokemon jessiebelle #pokemon oc #original character #ash ketchum #cw character death

[oldmilfenjoyer]

yes I have a presentation for my funding tomorrow. yes I’m coping.

#mabel #house of leaves #white is for witching #the haunting of hill house #huh #almost all of these: love stories #white is for witching: jesus christ. okay.

[dreamwritesimagines]

Burn The Witch 23 - Haunted Heart [Bucky Barnes x Reader]

A.N: Thank you so much for your wonderful support and feedback my loves ! ❤ Here’s the next chapter, I hope you like it as well and please let me know what you think! ❤ Thank you! ❤❤❤

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Female Reader

Warnings: Enemies to lovers, lovers to enemies, fake dating, mentions of blood, sex, violence, death, manipulation, language, guns, knives.

Summary: Coming home can cause issues.

Series Masterlist

                          SIX MONTHS LATER

You flipped the knife in your hand as the guy tied to the chair glared at you.

“You know,” you trailed off, “I’ve had a really shitty couple of months, Johnny- can I call you Johnny?”

“No.”

“Rude,” you commented, “Fine. John. I’ve had a really shitty couple of months so you really don’t want to try me right now. Just tell me where I can find your boss.”

“You’ll never find him you stupid bitch.”

You rolled your eyes.

“Since I’m going to kill you in a couple of minutes I feel like I can share some things with you,” you said, “My best friend says I keep everything bottled and I should talk about my feelings.”

“Go fuck yourself.”

“See, that’s exactly how I feel!” you pointed at him, “Thank you. I mean, I feel angry at myself. I kind of fucked up with the man I love.”

“Jesus Christ, just kill me already.”

“I’m waiting for a text to do that Johnny,” you pointed out, waving your phone at him. “So, I tricked him and used him and threw him to wolves. And then Accords 2.0 didn’t pass and he has been pardoned once again, and he’s a free man now. I have a strong feeling that he’s not the ‘forgive and forget’ type of guy. You know, assassin to assassin.”

“You’re the chattiest assassin I’ve ever met.”

“Thank you, I’m trying to improve myself,” you said, “I mean what exactly should I do? I don’t even trust my agency at this point, my handler lied to me and I have been at this fucking place for six months now, hunting you down. Well, your boss but…”

“You’ll never find him.”

“We’ll see about that my friend,” you said, “So anyway, like what am I supposed to do? I lost the one guy I actually loved. How do you cope with that? Because drinking doesn’t work, sleeping with others doesn’t work…. Nothing seems to—“ you were cut off when your phone vibrated and you touched the screen to open the text message.

From: Julian

Go for it.

“Wait, no no no, I’ll talk—“

“Kind of too late,” you pointed the gun at him, “Nice to meet you Johnny.”

With that you pulled the trigger, silencer doing its job as there was no loud bang or anything. His body fell back with the impact, and you heaved a sigh.

“Maybe I need a therapist I can’t kill,” you mumbled and walked out of the warehouse to approach the car before opening the door to the passenger seat to get in.

“Is it done?” Julian asked and you nodded, rubbing at your eyes.

“Yep.”

“Are you hungry?”

You made a face, “Just because the General sent you here does not mean we’re going to become buddies.”

“I’m not trying to become buddies with you,” Julian stated, “I just want to eat fries and there’s a two for one deal.”

You eyed him up and down.

“Fine, I could eat fries.” You leaned back in the seat as he started driving, keeping your eyes on the road. Soon enough, you reached the city center and Julian got fries from a food truck, then sat across from you.

“So,” he said, “You do realize this whole thing would’ve been over by now if we actually worked together?”

“I’m not going on the field with you.”

“The General sent me here to help you.”

You dipped the fry into sauce, then popped it into your mouth, “You can help me by pretending you’re not here.”

“Y/N.”

“You know what they say Julian. Fool me once…”

“Don’t tell me you’re still holding that grudge.”

“You mean when you left me behind to die on the last mission we were together?” you asked back, “That grudge?”

“I told you—“

“I’m not going to talk about that with you,” you cut him off, “And I work better alone. Who told you we could waste the guy by the way?”

“The General.”

You grabbed the salt shaker to pour some salt on the fries, causing Julian to make a face.

“Are you kidding me? That was salty enough-“

“Why did he not text me?”

“No idea. Maybe he’s avoiding you because he promised you handler and here you are. Field spy.”

Your jaw clenched.

Or maybe he’s avoiding me because he fucking lied to me.

You had to give it to him, it was the perfect plan. The moment he had suspected you were getting too close to Bucky, he had come up with the one thing he knew that would make you switch sides.

And that-

That was below the belt yes, but that was also masterly.

But at the end of the day, you barely had two people to trust in the entire world, and you seriously doubted you could ever forgive the General for what he had done. You knew he held duty above all, above family and surely above you, but that didn’t mean it didn’t hurt.

You shook your head at yourself and grabbed another piece of fry.

“So um…” Julian shifted his weight, “Are you okay?”

You shot him a glare, arching a brow, “Peachy.”

“No I mean… About Barnes.”

“What are you talking about?”

“This whole Accords 2.0 failure, there’s no way we could go after him again.”

“I don’t want to go after him again.”

“You don’t want revenge?”

That made you straighten up your back and you put the fry down, “And why exactly would I want revenge?”

That made Julian fall silent and you nibbled on your lip.

“What exactly did the General tell you before you came here?”

“That there was a job here.”

“Bullshit,” you replied way too quickly, “Did he send you here to be my babysitter? He thinks I’ll go after Barnes myself is that it? That’s why they sent you here months after I left the country but right after Accords 2.0 didn’t pass.”

Julian licked his lips.

“Listen, the agency wants to keep you safe—“ he started but then his phone beeped. He grabbed it to take aa look at the screen, then cussed under his breath.

“What?”

“Check your texts.”

You touched the screen and frowned as your eyes skimmed the text.

From: General

Time to come home.

“Well,” you muttered, your heart dropping to your stomach, “Shit.”

                                                   ***

Coming back home was harder than ever now. After catching up with Keith and Chloe, you were taken to your new apartment that was given to you by the agency as usual, and for the whole night you couldn’t sleep.

Even if there was no trace of Bucky in your new apartment –in your new life, you still couldn’t shake off this feeling. It was as if the moment you had entered the country, Bucky had entered your life in an instant.

Odds were, you wouldn’t really see him again. After all it was a big city, and Bucky wasn’t exactly the social type.

So your first week back in New York wasn’t exactly terrible. You were still waiting for your orders while getting to know to the city slowly, because after long missions it always took time for you to remember you had a real life there, real memories—

Well, as real as it could be, for a spy.

“Just see it as a vacation,” Chloe had said, “They threw you into another mission as soon as you got out of the country, it’s just a delayed vacation.”

As far as vacations went though, this one just sucked.

Maybe it was because you couldn’t keep away from places you and Bucky had been too, like this coffee place where you had first officially met.

You sipped your coffee, scrolling down on the news website as your eyes skimmed yet another article about Accords and whether you could trust superheroes or not, but you were soon distracted when someone pulled the seat across from you, making you look up from your phone.

And as soon as you did, your heart dropped.

You had to give it to the General, he was manipulative, he was a liar and he had betrayed your trust terribly but the one thing he had done right was training you well. Aside from that one second, you managed to adapt a look of nonchalance on your face, slowly putting your phone down.

“Hello Cap.”

Sam raised his brows and eyed you up and down.

“You’re back?”

You could swear he could hear your heartbeat and you shrugged your shoulders, looking around.

“Yeah,” you said, “Big apple and everything.”

“So much for the small town girl.”

“I have never been a small town girl,” you drawled, “Never been to Oregon either.”

“Yeah, I can tell.”

You turned your coffee cup on the table just so you could do something with your hands.

“Why?” he asked after a beat and you shifted your weight despite your whole training of feeling calm and collected, nervousness hitting you out of nowhere.

“You’re a veteran, Wilson,” you managed to say, “You don’t need me to tell you how the chain of command works. Army doesn’t care how we feel about orders.”

“I’m very familiar with how chain of command works,” he pointed out, “But you’re not a soldier, Y/N. You’re a spy.”

“That makes it even worse,” you stated, “I know it sounds like an excuse, but… you don’t know how my agency works. I don’t get to say no to orders, and I sure as hell don’t get to blow my own cover.”

“But you wanted to, didn’t you?”

Jesus Christ, Wilson was really good at this observation thing.

“Doesn’t matter what I want,” you said, “I’m no use to anyone if I develop a conscience.”

“But you did,” he insisted, “Why else would you come to help us? Why else would you warn him beforehand?”

“He told you about that?”

He shot you a look, “What do you think, Y/N?”

You scoffed a laughter. “I was feeling generous,” you said, “No other reason.”

He kept his gaze on you for a couple of seconds, as if trying to see whether you would cave before he took a deep breath.

“You know he was going to propose, right?”

That-

That was just too much. You could feel your jaw hanging as you stared at him in complete silence, his words echoing in your ears.

“No,” you said after a moment, then shook your head fervently, your nose in the air, “No you’re wrong.”

“I’m not,” Sam said, “Apparently he was looking for this… house painted in white with—a red door or something.”

Don’t cry.

Do not fucking cry.

Spies don’t cry over heartbreak.

You clenched your jaw and blinked back the tears, straightening your back.

“It’s a good thing he didn’t get to, then.”

“Y/N, he loved you.”

“No Sam, he loved someone who doesn’t exist,” you replied, “Sweet small town girl with sundresses and smiles and some house in the suburbs with kids and all that shit. Girls like me don’t get that ending, I have way too much blood on my hands.”

He pressed his lips together and you cleared your throat.

“How much does he hate me?”

“Why do you think he hates you?”

“Assassins aren’t good at forgiving,” you said, “I would know, we don’t have that talent.”

“That’s not a talent, that’s a choice.”

“It really isn’t,” you muttered, “So?”

“Why don’t you ask him?”

You let out a bitter laugh, “Yeah no. Actions have consequences and I’d rather not cross paths with the deadliest assassin in the world after double crossing him.”

“But you want him to forgive you.”

“What makes you say that?”

“Intuition,” he said and pushed his chair back to stand up.

“He didn’t kill your father, Y/N.”

You heaved a sigh.

“I know,” you said, “Trust me, I would’ve walked away so much easier if he had.”

“Enjoy your coffee,” he said and walked out of the coffee house. You threw your head back, closing your eyes.

“Yep. I shouldn’t have come back.”

                                                  ***

“I never thought I’d say this, but I kind of hate that we’re not living so close anymore,” you pressed the phone between your shoulder and your ear and opened the door to your apartment as Keith chuckled.

“I knew you’d miss me.”

“Shut up.”

“You’re a softie deep inside. Very very deep inside.”

“If you repeat that in front of anyone I swear to God…” you muttered and he groaned.

“Have I told you they’re putting me in the same team as Julian?”

“You guys have a new mission?”

“Not a long one probably.”

“Why the fuck am I—“

“Because you’re on a vacation,” he cut you off, “And also they’re probably going to make you a handler, that’s worth waiting for.”

“That or….”

“We’re not talking about that on the phone,” Keith said quickly, “Amateur.”

“Careful there, I’ll outrank you soon enough,” you said, walking to the bathroom to wash your hands. “I’ll talk to you later, okay?”

“Alright, see you later!” he said and hung up. You put your phone into your pocket, then washed your hands and made your way to the kitchen.

It was only when you put the wine bottle back into the fridge that you noticed something was off. Your body moved on its own accord, before you knew it you had already grabbed the knife in your boots and threw it to the figure in the dark corner of the room but he easily caught it, metal hitting what sounded like another kind of metal before he stepped out of the corner. Your breath caught in your throat, and for the first time in your life you froze, all the training leaving your mind.

You were supposed to be looking for a weapon, any kind of weapon but somehow, your body refused to move.

Bucky turned your knife in his hands, his gaze pinning you to your spot before he tilted his head.

“Hi honey,” he said, his voice way too cold. “I’m home.”

Chapter 24

#bucky barnes #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes imagine #bucky barnes x you #bucky barnes imagines

[jamesbuchananxsteviegrant]

She Who Shan't Be Named - Part 1 | Sugar Lips (Tony x Reader, Clint x Reader, ??? x Reader)

Category: Smut (Mandatory) Age: 18+ Trigger Warnings: Explicit language, oral sex (male receiving), suggestive language, alcohol, drunk sexual actions, casual sexual actions, flirting with a lot of people Ship: Tony x Reader, Clint x Reader, ??? x Reader Summary: Tony lets his life-long friend crash at the Avengers HQ while she has nowhere else to go. What could go wrong with so many attractive individuals living in the same home? Word Count: 1.7k Masterlist: LINK

(hmu if you want adding to the tag-list for this series)

---

“I, unfortunately, have someone I want to introduce you all to.” Tony begins as he’s gathered everyone in the living quarters.

“Unfortunately? Well, that always sounds like a good start, Stark.” Natasha jokes, sitting alongside Bucky and Sam on one of the couches.

Tony rolls his eyes and shrugs.

“Yeah, well,” He trails off. “This is (Y/N) (L/N).” He gestures, pointing to the woman leaning against a pillar in the back corner of the room.

She makes an effort to stand upright and walk further into the room.

“Well, hello. It’s nice to finally meet you all in person.”

To say everyone in the room falls speechless with their eyes wide and jaws dropped is an understatement.

“Oh my God, you lot are insatiable.” Tony groans, rolling his eyes once more.

(Y/N) can only smirk and wink at just about everyone in the room.

“You’re welcome, Starky Boy.”

“Put a sock in it, sugar-lips.”

“Sugar-lips?” Rhodey quizzes, amusement dripping from his voice.

Tony and (Y/N) can only stare at one another and grin as they remember where that nickname came from.

*** flashback ***

“One more for the road?” Tony suggests to the very, very drunk (Y/N) beside him.

It’s three-thirty-AM, they’re both at their favourite bar in Manhattan, enjoying a belated birthday weekend of (Y/N)’s which he regretfully missed due to Avenger work.

“You know how to tempt me, Starky-boy.” She teases with a wink, waving her hand up to catch the attention of the bartender, Harrison, who they’ve grown acquainted with over the years of drinking at his bar.

Tony falls into a comfortable silence as he simply stares at the woman he’s been friends with since he was a teen at Phillips Academy.

“Take a picture, it’ll last longer.” The woman’s sarcastic comment pushes him over the edge. Within a second, his hands are grabbing her head and pulling her in for a harsh, desperate, passion-fueled kiss.

Harrison smirks as he sits their drinks down, watching how the pair have had ridiculous amounts of sexual tension coursing through them since they first started coming to the bar over ten years ago.

“What, the fuck?” (Y/N) manages to breathe between kisses.

“Stop talking.” Tony murmurs in response, only intensifying the kiss more and more.

“Tony,” She attempts but makes no effort to stop the man. No. Absolutely not.

She’s gotten herself off to the thought of this man too many times for her to want to stop.

Her hands are grasping at the black shirt that adorns his torso, his own hands moving down to grab her hips, itching to have her closer and closer.

“Jesus Christ.” The woman gasps as best she can. “Anthony!”

The man pulls back at the use of his full name but doesn’t let go of her hips.

“Tell me you haven’t wanted to do that?” He asks, voice deep. Low. Husky.

“Of course I wanted to fucking do it, you imbecile!”

His hand jumps up to grasp at her throat, a gasp escaping her lips.

“Watch your mouth.”

“Guys, you’re gonna make my customers leave; the back lounge is empty.” Harrison interrupts. Tony continues to make no effort to stop his actions. They’re both too drunk to care.

Not that he’d care anymore so when he’s sober.

The billionaire practically drags the woman off of their barstools, (Y/N) frantically grabbing their drinks, spilling half of them on the floor - to which she gives Harrison an apologetic look but he simply rolls his eyes with a grin.

A small shriek escapes the woman’s lips as Tony throws her into the room, her hands managing to sit the, now half-empty, drinks on the coffee table.

“On your knees.”

“Don’t need to tell me twice.” She grins, obeying the man’s order whilst quickly throwing her hair into a messy ponytail.

“Always knew you were a slut.” The man growls, unbuckling his belt and zipper on his smart trousers.

“You know me best, Starky Boy.”

She wastes no time in taking the man’s solid cock into her mouth, moaning at the feeling and taste, Tony groaning in satisfaction.

“Look how desperate you are for it.” He condescends yet continues to thrust into her mouth, fucking the back of her throat.

No words can be formed to give the man a reply. She’s too busy focusing on taking his impressive shaft down her throat, making sure her lips are touching his pelvis.

“Christ!”

He can’t help himself. His hands are in her hair, grabbing it and yanking her closer to his body, not thinking about anything other than the noise of her gagging.

“FUCK! You filthy fucking slut.”

She moans at that, working his cock more and more.

It’s not too long later before the man is releasing all over the woman’s face, her sticking her tongue out and taking as much of it as she can.

“This was a brand new blouse, Stark.” She complains, jokingly, as she licks her white lips. “Ugh, salty.”

“Don’t lie, you know it’s sweeter than sugar.” Tony laughs, re-doing his trousers.

“It definitely fucking isn’t.” (Y/N) groans, standing up and licking the rest of the mess off of her mouth.

“Whatever you say, sugar-lips.”

“TONY!”

*** flashback end ***

“A nickname I gave her once upon a time.” Tony vaguely explains, (Y/N) chuckling.

“Okay. So why’s she here?” Bucky asks, not taking his eyes off the most attractive woman he’s ever seen in his life.

“She has a name.” (Y/N) comments, quirking a flirtatious brow at the man.

The super soldier raises his brows but smirks.

“Why’re you here, doll?”

Now, that does something to her core.

“Starky Boy told me that y’all need a babysitter, so here I am!” She boasts, evidently joking but it makes everyone grin and not ask anymore questions.

“I’ve known her since I was in my teens, she’s a family friend.” Tony adds, reassuring everyone that she’s not someone to be cautious of.

“Pft, family friend? Don’t compliment yourself, Stark.” (Y/N) jokes, everyone laughing with her. “Anyway, in all seriousness, hello, I’m (Y/N). I’m temporarily chilling here if you’re all alright with it since I got nowhere else to be.”

“A pleasure, (Y/N). Steve Rogers.” Captain America begins, stepping forward and shaking the woman’s hand.

“Pleasure’s all mine, Captain.” She winks, the man smirking at her antics which will be refreshing around the compound.

“Bucky.” The Winter Soldier greets, nodding his head at the woman from his seat on the couch.

“Romanoff.” Black Widow follows, (Y/N) biting her lip at the red-head. “Natasha Romanoff.”

“Alright, James Bond.” Sam jokes, everyone laughing.

“Tony, I can’t believe this is the first time you’ve given me the opportunity to meet the Natasha Romanoff.” (Y/N) beams, winking at the woman who returns the gesture with a smug smile.

“Christ.” Tony groans, face-palming harder than ever.

“Sam Wilson.” The man smirks, reaching out to shake the woman’s hand from his position on the couch.

“Bird Boy.”

He gives a hearty laugh at that.

“Sure.”

“James Rhodes, but call me Rhodey.”

“So you’re the Transformer’s identical twin, right?” The woman quizzes, rhetorically, shaking the man’s hand.

Another round of laughter.

“Something like that.”

“Bruce. Bruce Banner.”

“The guy I don’t wanna piss off; got it.” (Y/N) smiles, watching the brunet give her an anxious smile and chuckle. “Or maybe I do.” She adds with a wink, basking in the entertainment that comes from his embarrassed expression.

“(Y/N).” Tony groans, semi-threateningly.

“Yes, Anthony?” She asks, smiling at him like an innocent child who’s never done wrong.

“Good day to you, beautiful mortal. I am Thor of Asgard.”

“Wowee…” The woman widens her eyes as the God leans down to kiss her cheeks. “The one and only.”

“That would be I.” He smiles, throwing her a wink also. “A pleasure to make your acquaintance.”

“Stop hogging the limelight already.” A voice complains from beside the God of Thunder.

“Well, well, well, if it isn’t the God of Mischief.”

“Well, well, well, a beautiful lady such as yourself knows who I am, huh?” Loki greets, taking her hand and leans down to press a kiss to her knuckles, Tony continuing to grunt and groan in the background.

“Hard not to when you get off on destroying New York.” (Y/N) grins, a chorus of laughter filling the room yet again.

“Stop hogging the limelight.” A female voice mimics Loki's previous words.

“Well if it isn’t the Scarlet Witch!”

“That is I.” Wanda grins. “Wanda.” She adds, holding her hand out for (Y/N) to shake, which she accepts graciously.

“Tony, do you know how pissed I am that you’ve not introduced me to these people until now?”

“Oh my God, I’m literally going to kick you out.” The billionaire responds, pouring himself a whisky from the bar at the back of the living quarters.

“Yeah, yeah.” (Y/N) retorts, winking at Wanda before turning to the couch beside her which a certain Archer is leisurely laid across. “Barton.”

“(L/N).”

“Long time no see.”

“Ya think?” Clint quirks a brow, jokingly.

“How’s Laura? How’re the kids?”

“Not bad, not bad. How’s Michael?”

“Dead if I had any say in the matter.” The woman casually threatens as the brunet mentions her ex-boyfriend.

He breathes out a laugh.

“Commitment issues as good as ever then?”

“You know me, Robin.” She jokes, using the nickname she gave me when he came on a night out with Tony and her many moons ago.

“You two know each other?” Wanda questions.

They both shrug.

“Somewhat.” Clint answers, (Y/N) giving him a playful slap on the shoulder.

“You love me!”

He grins and sits up before standing.

“You know I do, come ‘ere.” The man chuckles, pulling the woman in for a tight embrace.

“Missed you, Robin.”

“You too, Marian.” He responds, using the fairytale nicknames from Robin Hood.

“Those two have definitely banged.” Sam snarks from across the room, Natasha agreeing.

“Jealousy doesn’t look good on you, Wilson.” Clint teases, flashing a wink his way.

“Now, now, boys.” The woman settles, turning to the young gentleman on the other couch, staring at her with some much awe in his eyes. “Who’s the kid?” She asks, staring at him directly yet directing her question at Tony.

“Uh, hi, I’m Peter. Peter Parker.” He stumbles, standing upright and holding out his hand for her to shake.

She giggles.

“Corruptible.”

“(L/N)!” Tony yells, the woman only laughing as she shakes the young man’s hand.

“A pleasure, spider-boy.”

Peter’s eyes widen at her knowing.

“Right, are we done? That was exhausting.” Tony complains for the nth time.

“Oh, grow a pair, Stark.” (Y/N) retorts.

“I will literally kick you out of this building.”

“You ain’t got the nerve.”

Downing a swig of his whisky, Tony takes a deep breath but smiles at the woman.

“It’ll be nice to have you around, sugar-lips.”

“I bet.” She winks, everyone chuckling again.

And that’s just the beginning of her relationships with everyone at the Avengers HQ.

---

Everything Tag List: @nosoulnoproblems | @rileyloves5  | @girl-who-loves-mythology | @avngrsinitiative | @lookinsidemyhead |@xbabykookiix | @myspectacularfantasies | @fanfic-anyone | @rororo06 | @queenofbuskers | @vapingisntmything | @tony-stank3 | @hermione-grangers-wife | @lili-ann-love | @the-omni-princess | @tayahs-blog | @regulus-black | @saturnsteverogers| @fyfiexo | @amazingiam00 | @deviltownn | @buckybarneses | @fafulous | roryshitposts | trynnabemultifandom | @moodboreddd | @hopingforbarnes | @an-adventureland | justassaneasiam-ll | @profoundllamanickeleggs | @xbongox | @minetticatinwonderland | @thinkaboutmara | @xxaestheticboyxx | @sparklycollectionofoldmemes | @wandaneedstherapy | @georgiadixon | @nerdy-thespian-10 | @nsb-supertrio | @thinkaboutmara | @captainamerica-is-bae | @spookyparadisesheep | @supernaturallover2002 | @notsochillnerd | @peggycarter-steverogers | @reann-shitposting |

#Marvel #MCU #Steve Rogers #Bucky Barnes #Tony Stark #Iron Man #Captain America #Sam Wilson #Falcon #The Winter Soldier #Black Widow #Natasha Romanoff #Wanda Maximoff #Clint Barton #Hawkeye #Loki #Thor #God of Thunder #God of Mischief #James Rhodes #Rhodey #War Machine #Avengers #Avengers x Reader #Smut #Tony x Reader #tony x reader smut #Tony Stark Smut #Clint x Reader smut #Reader

[uglierdaikon]

Books!

Friends, Romans, countrymen, please, beg no more! For all two of you who have asked, here is my list of my favorite books from my Goodreads of the past year or so (rated, because I have some free time and love having opinions)

·        The Passion of Dolssa by Julia Berry

Rated: 8.5/10

This books has everything!

Peasants

Unreliable narrators

Prostitutes

Ugly people as main characters and romantic leads

A girl who bangs our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ in her dreams

o   Actual summary: This book is split between multiple perspectives (mainly the titular Dolssa and a young woman named Botille), as well as (fictional) written accounts or interrogations conducted by clergymen into the issue of Dolssa, a young mystic being pursued for heresy during the time of the Inquisition. The story follows Dolssa’s journey of faith and attempts to avoid capture, a clergyman’s attempts to find her and execute her, and the experiences of a young woman who finds and protects Dolssa from her pursuers. It’s cool as hell, and it talks about one of my favorite aspects of religious history, female mystics (women who had dreams of speaking to Jesus, or even being in relationships with him. Some people saw them as prophets and holy women, others saw them as blasphemers. It’s a really interesting and complicated topic and this book covers it in such a cool way!)

YA, so she doesn’t bang Jesus on screen. Sorry to disappoint

·        The Lord of the Rings: Fellowship of the Ring by J R R Tolkien (Jirt)

Rated: 9/10

One of the most bangin’ books of all time. You know it. You love it. If you haven’t seen the movies, go watch them. Or read the books (which I myself am only just beginning). Although personally I’d recommend seeing the movies first because the writing is a little complicated at times and it helps to have a point of reference to fully understand what’s going on, if I’m being completely honest. Once you get used to the writing style though, it's so immersive and the world it creates is simultaneously beautiful, homey/familiar, otherworldly, and frightening. God tier shit

·        The Lost Apothecary by Sarah Penner

Rated: 7.5/10

Not my FAVORITE thing I’ve read all year, but overall a super interesting mix of historical fiction and contemporary fiction. This book has two timelines: one of an apothecary in the late 1700s who dispenses poisons to women who wish to kill the men in their lives, and one of an amateur historian trying to solve the mystery of these snippets of information she keeps finding about a possibly murderous apothecary who lived centuries before. It’s very cool, and the only reason I put it lower on the list is because I thought the ending dragged on too long. Big fan!

·        The Song of the Jade Lily by Kirsty Manning

Rated: 10/10

Okay so I’m realizing as I write this list that this was just the year of me reading historical fiction like a maniac. Anyways, this is also a split timeline, historical fiction and contemporary fiction novel. The first timeline covers the experiences of a young Jewish refugee whose family fled to Shanghai following Kristellnacht, but are unable to avoid the war entirely as tension and violence builds in China. The other timeline covers the granddaughter of this refugee, who returns to China to try to learn more about her deceased mother’s birth family (as the mother was adopted by her grandparents, the Jewish refugees). It’s less complicated than it sounds, I swear. I’ve been telling everyone I know to read this one, and now I’m telling you guys to read it. It made me cry, which is a big recommendation imo.

·        Circe by Madeline Miller

Rated: 500/10

THIS IS IT. THIS IS THE BEST BOOK I HAVE READ IN THE PAST YEAR

I don’t know if I’ve expressed this enough on here but I am a MASSIVE mythology nerd, and Madeline Miller my beloved is a classical historian and writer. This book delves into the life of the witch Circe (of Odyssey, and turning men into pigs, fame), reimagining her from a black and white villain into someone more sympathetic, someone you actually root for. I will say this book has themes of violence against women and sexual assault, so skip it if that’s not something you want to read about. I absolutely adored this book though.

·        The Song of Achilles, also by Madeline Miller

Rated: 8/10

This is less good than Circe but it’s still good! It’s also YA rather than adult fiction so it’s tamer

This is a love story about the Greek hero Achilles and his friend Patroclus, taking place from the time that they’re children to when they go off to fight in the Trojan War. If you’re familiar with the Iliad, you know these guys. If you’re not… well, I won’t spoil it. But I read this book in one sitting. The writing is amazing, I loved the characters, it’s well-paced. You’ll love it. Give it a shot.

·        Dolores Claiborne by Stephen King

Rated: 9.5/10

This whole book is written as a monologue, which is so damn cool. The whole thing is told as a woman in her 60s confessing to two murders: one that she was actually arrested for, and the other from about thirty years earlier. C’mon, guys, it’s Stephen King. I don’t need to tell you that it’s damn good. You KNOW it’s damn good. I listened to this as an audiobook in my car and I used to think of places to go just for an excuse to drive somewhere and listen to it.

·        Honorable mentions

(aka, I can’t tell you if these books are ACTUALLY good, or if I’m just obsessed with them. I love them though, and that’s enough for them to make the list) (These are both by the same author, and friends who have listened to me clown about these books are probably already laughing at me)

o   Mo Dao Zu Shi, or “The Grandmaster of Demonic Cultivation” by Mo Xiang Tong Xiu

Rated: you would ask me to rate my blorbos?? On this, a blorbo blog?

Oh god. How the fuck do I explain this book. Okay so it’s about magical ghost/demon-fighting warriors in Ancient China. That’s important to know right off the bat. The main character, Wei Wuxian, was one of the most powerful members of his generation, but he was killed for his crimes after essentially becoming a necromancer to get revenge on his enemies and win a war. However, years after his death, he wakes up in the body of somebody who sold his soul in exchange for Wei Wuxian to come back and take revenge on his behalf. So now Wei Wuxian is back, and getting dragged into mysteries and intrigue and the like, all while trying to hide who he actually is. Also he falls in love and it’s great, so happy for him.

This book is rated 17+ and has smut in the back half, so skip this if that’s not your thing

If that’s NOT your thing, I still recommend the animated series or the live action adaptation (The Untamed), both of which have no smut. However, they also leave out the romance in general because of Chinese censorship laws, so you win some you lose some in that regard. They’re both great adaptations otherwise

o   The Scum Villain’s Self-Saving System, also by Mo Xiang Tong Xiu

Rated: the main character is not a blorbo, but truly just feels like a personal friend of mine who happens to be a messy bitch. Still morally obligated not to rate it. Shen Yuan, you stupid whore, I love you

Okay, so there’s this guy named Shen Yuan who is a hater, an anti, an internet troll. He just goes online and leave mean reviews on this popular web novel called Proud Immortal Demon Way. He hates this book so much that it’s like, all he has energy for. All he does is read this book and get mad about it. Terrible. Anyways he hates it so much that he chokes and dies while reading the last chapter, and he wakes up as the “scum villain” of the novel. There is a System that communicates with him (kind of like the instructions of a video game, but sentient). This System basically tells him that he can either make the story better himself since he hates it so much, or he can sit down and shut up. So he has to change the novel from the inside as a character, and if he fails to he’ll die in the same brutal, torturous way that the original character does.

Somebody please read this it’s taken over my life

This is actually my favorite book that I’ve read in the last year, and the hardest one to actually recommend to people because like… read at your own risk.

Warnings for violence, toxic relationship dynamics, internalized homophobia, and uh. Dubious consent in the back half. You’ll know when it’s coming, just skip it if you need to

#tumblr deleted the whole post and I had to redo it #which was not very cool of tumblr #book recs #book recommendations #not jshk #this was so fun though #cmon guys I wouldn't recommend you anything but the best! #if you end up reading any of these please let me know so we can chat about it! #mini book club! #also thank you to Cat and Mac for showing interest in hearing my book recs love you guys

[black-coffee-and-sugar]

6x13: The Gauntlet

Two enjoyable episodes back-to-back? I'm shook! Obviously 6x13 lacks the serious messaging and emotional weight of last week's episode but the silliness of it was actually entertaining. My thoughts:

- opening scene is a supercorp hug. christ y'all need to warn people! i was not ready. the way kara's face lit up when she saw lena, the way lena smiled back at her. the way they hugged fully pressed. my heart is full.

- kara n lena immediately whisking away to the fortress right after that for some alone time. i love where your head is at kara 😏

- look at dansen being all cute and shit! who gave them the right honestly?

- glad they continued with kelly still processing the stuff from last episode. and alex is really trying to do better. dansen is the example to follow when it comes to healthy adult relationships. i really didn't think this show was capable.

- it's getting harder and harder to like andrea

- i actually forgot willy was shot last season. and they worked through his trauma off screen. what was the point of showing him getting a blast of courage if we weren't going to see him face his fears and shit. y'all really don't like deep topics huh.

- andrea: where's the journalist i hired?

apparently crisis changed him from a stalkery dickhead to the nice baking guy he is now. sorry girl. valid question tho

- can i just say that everyone was looking exceptionally hot in this episode? like lena, kelly and nxyly in particular jesus help me.

- i haven't enjoyed j'onn this much in so long. he was hilarious. letting that mad scientist lady plummel him in the chest, saying "hold that thought", not moving away from the dragon fire.

- brainy possessed by veeta you could tell jesse was told to just have fun with it

- also did this kryptonian witch just say 'ya mon'?

- lena looking all smol and shit with her little white sneakers and soft clothes and her waterfall hair. kara! kiss this woman already!

- kara in the suit talking privately with lena. honestly never thought i'd see the day

- kara: you really don't believe in magic?

lena: i believe in you

NO ONE TOUCH ME!!!

- this seriously tho this is such a true statement. they both have believed in each other from minute one, when they had no reason to. and yea lena tried to hate kara for a little while but even then, she never stopped believing in kara's compassion and optimism and kara never stopped believing in lena's goodness and brilliance. just say the words 'i love you' explicitly please.

- interesting that kara's test of courage takes place during her rescuing alex's plane and not idk...all the times she was too scared to tell lena. she thinks it's that one random dude she didn't save and not the times with lena (something she admits terrified her). the only thing i can think of for this moment they chose is because yes kara embraced her powers that night but she didn't step out into the public eye as herself, as the last daughter of krypton. she wasn't vulnerable in that respect. because she was scared to be discovered. because she grew up with that fear and need to fit in (she talks about that in later S1). but i will only accept this IF the show ends with kara stepping out into the world fully and no longer having to hide or deny parts of herself. but i also don't see how you make the courage test about telling lena and not have that end with kara admitting she's in love with her so. that might be why.

- nxyly's courage test was actually very sad. i feel for her truly it's not fair what happened. but her being vulnerable about her feelings is interesting because kara still hasn't learned how to do that

- lena having some convenient device to contain the totem just cuz kara needs it. we love handy and resourceful girlfriends

- what was the point of having lena at the museum if she wasn't gonna be affected? y'all copped out!

- that device that was harnessing lightning also somehow made lightning? is that how it works?

- i ASCENDED when i saw alex and lena being the only ones at kara's bedside. like straight out of fanfiction wtf. how many more times are they going to establish that the two most important people in kara's life is alex (her sister and ride or die) and lena (her best friend and perfect partner). how many times before you make this shit canon?!?!

- 'a reluctant earth witch' it's a very interesting way to pronounce lena luthor

- but also, y'all are telling me that a human witch can tap into imp magic? reality warping magic? all-powerful magic? fuck, lena is really on her way to becoming the most powerful being on the planet

- kelly showing up because lena called. im gonna go ahead and assume this indicates that lena and kelly have also spoken about lena ignoring her message. and that they had a meaningful discussion about it and what happened at the ormfell. because as much as i love lena, she deserved to be dragged just as much (if not more) as the superfriends.

- kelly shielding alex was a good visual. kinda stupid but nice.

- dansen couch scene i stopped breathing cuz i swore kelly was about to propose. i love them so much

- supercorp couch scene is where i died because it came at me without warning. kara sans glasses in her civilian clothes. not performing as kara danvers or supergirl. here she's just kara, an alien refugee chilling with her best friend. which is all she ever wanted and she deserves it!

- kara handing lena her plate. stop it!

- but also lena is in the same clothes all episode. which means they left the tower together. and headed straight to kara's apartment. lena definitely slept over in kara's pjs. I'M NOT OKAY!

- this is the first couch scene we got since alex n kara in 6x08. where Kara admits she doesn't want to be alone anymore. and now she isn't because lena is back. god i actually can't.

- kara's face when lena tells her about being a witch. she's so smitten! they're in love your honour

- lena saying that kara is the epitome of courageous with such seriousness and intensity. even though kara tries to brush it off cuz she can't really agree right now, lena means it 100%

- lena's sad face when kara wanted to stay connected to nxyly even though she could get hurt. worried wife energy we love to see it

- poor nxyly must be confused asf

- but also it's canon that kara feels hopeful and happy around lena and no one can take that from me. and it's not just words. kara's behavior is different, she's smiling more, she's opening up. acting choices melissa explain yourself!

not bad at all. we were fed lots of supercorp after months of nothing. they better keep up this momentum. it was lighter episode in terms of emotions and what have you compare to pervious ones. seems like the season is officially kicking off now that lena is back. probably going to have a totem of the week kinda deal but hopefully they include kelly's storyline with the heights cuz i wanna see the conclusion of that.

#supergirl #supercorp #dansen #kara danvers #lena luthor #kelly olsen #alex danvers #brainy #nia nal #6x13 spoilers

[itistimeforusalltodecidewhoweare]

Nikaaaaaaa!

1. What is your favorite dessert? Is there a specific Austrian dessert you like?

2. What is the worst movie you've ever seen?

3. What AU are you working on? 👀👀

REN!! <3

you did not want this answer to be this extensive. no one wanted that. but you opened this can of worms and now we all have to lie in it. let's do this.

1. dessert, baby

i fucking love dessert sorry. my personal favourite is anything chocolate. chocolate cake, chocolate cookies, brownies, brookies, chocolate croissants, you name it. BUT you asked for austrian desserts and i shall deliver.

now first of all what's important to know is that most desserts can be a sweet main course if you up the size. kaiserschmarrn is excellent, it's essentially scrambled pancake but you often eat it as a main course. another specialty is literally any kind of christmas baking. our cookies aren't like american cookies, they're more like biscuits. they're a lot smaller (you know a cookie is good if you can eat it in one go), and they're often made with shortcrust pastry that gets filled with jam or dipped in glaze. i could eat my entire body weight in vanillekipferl, linzer augen and/or kaffeekeksen.

also pancakes?? pancakes are so underrated. any type of pancake. give it to me. i'm hungry now.

3. decisions were made and i hate them

i will actually answer this first because the second question full-on sent me into a rage. i'm still trying to write the roommate!bucky!AU and i hate everything. i know how i want it to play out, more or less, but anything more than the bare bones of it makes me want to sob. i've been at this for five weeks and i haven't even written 900 words.

i might change my idea for another one so that i'll have more time, but i'm also very stubborn. maybe i can still trick it somehow.

2. delete this from my brain

jesus christ okay. let's do this.

the amount of bad movies i have watched because of good actors is, frankly, obscene, and i still have my live talk through of george blagden's blood moon in my whatsapp history somewhere (my friend loves me), but what really took the cake for me was the covenant.

now let me reiterate that i will proceed to make fun of this movie until it dies and then turns in its grave multiple times and dies again; this is simply due to my not believing this should (or really could) ever have been made. i'm sure whoever did this made other things that are good. to me, personally, this was not. spoilers, i guess, if you want to care about that. i wouldn't. don't watch this.

picture this: it's the week before my birthday last summer. i have about ten days left to write a paper i don't want to write. i'm left unsupervised. i decide to watch a sebastian stan movie at 11am.

i'm seven minutes in when i start losing my mind.

now i'd heard about the movie before. i'd, at some point, seen that convention interview where a fan told sebastian they'd been a fan of his since the covenant and anthony mackie then proceeded to make fun of him; needless to say, i was intrigued. the basic premise is that four guys belong to the four surviving witch families of the salem witch trials who made a covenant (hah) that gave them magic powers. alright. this seemed interesting enough for 2006. what's the worst that could happen, i think.

the movie starts with a very long intro that looks like it'd been made with powerpoint. it probably was. it tells you the basic premise again until you want to beg it to finally stop the exposition and continue, for the love of god. it gets worse from here.

we cut to a college party. someone projectile vomits; that is not an exaggeration. i'm starting to feel sick. i watch white frat boys run from the police. someone jumps off a cliff. suddenly chace crawford appears. the dialogue is abysmal. i'm not even ten minutes into the movie and have already started to accept my fate.

from sebastian stan's very first appearance i can already tell he's going to be the antagonist. even at this point, i can't blame him. every other character in the movie is a wet blanket. i never learn any characters' names besides chase collins.

i frankly blank out for a while. the romance between the two main people is tragic, in the sense that they have nothing in common, no chemistry and i don't care about either of them. i guess the girl is smart-ish and the guy is the main magic boy (mmb) of the four. neither have any discernible personality.

sebastian goes all out for this film. it's sad, in a sense, because he's acting for his life and everyone else is like a high school drama teen that's just been weaned off their script. i'm starting to suspect he's contractually obligated to only play characters with big bi energy. i tell this to my friend. she ignores me. i'm left to deal with this on my own.

in a surprise twist, we find out that there is, in fact, a fifth son of ipswich (that's the magic boys' stupid nickname. i didn't google that that just flashed back into my mind like the vivid memory of a nightmare.) and it's chase collins. by talos, this can't be happening. it is. there is no way out.

why is chase collins the only notable character, you might ask. is it because he is played by sebastian stan? well, yes and no. this is the point i start losing my mind.

imagine you're writing a fantasy movie and you have four (i hesitate to say it) strong male main characters plus a bonus female one and an antagonist. who do you give the core character motivation to?

this, of course, is a trick question. the answer should be "all of them", but when in doubt, giving it to your main character should do the trick. that's how children's books work. to paraphrase starkid, "what's that one concrete goal that motivates all your actions? and if you don't have one of those, how is anyone supposed to sympathize with you, paul?"

so what do these absolute units do in this movie? they make their antagonist the only one with a goal, and thus the only one with a motivation, and thus the only person driving the plot of the movie.

you see, it turns out that using magic is actually bad for you. you get "the power" when you are thirteen and you "ascend" at eighteen, which just means you get more power. good. great. thing is, the more you use your power, the more addictive it will become, and the more it will eat up your life, because your power is your life. to quote myself, "sound concept, bit stupid, but works." power is life, life is power. sure.

now our main character antagonist chase was adopted as a child and grew up in a different town, so no one told him this very important piece of information that continually using your power will literally kill you. his natural reaction to running out of power after he turned eighteen thus is "i need more power in order to survive". that is a good motivation for a villain to have.

he is now waiting for the antagonist mmb to turn eighteen, so he will ascend, so that chase can take his powers from him and use them for himself so that he can continue living. again, that is a good fucking motivation for a character.

now, this is the part that truly boggles my mind to this day, the question that is burned into my brain. why the fuck would you make a movie in which your only proper character is the villain. why would you do that. the protagonists don't give me shit. i don't know anything about them apart from the fact that their names are stupid and they don't do anything useful with their powers for the entirety of this movie's overly long runtime. i am baffled.

the final big fight scene happens. it's atrocious to look at. chase temporarily seems to turn into spiderman and utters the fucking iconic sentence "oooh, witchy" and the even more iconic sentence "are you going to be my wiatch". (edit: i apologise. i refused to look anything up apart from my own ramblings at the time. it’s actually "how about i make you my wiatch." somehow i feel this is both better and worse.) mmb wins. i boo.

after it's over, we never see chase's corpse. the possibility of a sequel is frightening me. thankfully, to this day, it hasn't happened. i fear for the day they change their mind.

i don't remember anything that fucking happened that didn't involve his character, so here are some more amazing insane sebastian moments from the movie. there's a locker room scene where he's wearing his shirt open and enjoys getting punched in the face a little too much. in another bad fight scene he does a backflip over a car. he is the fucking god of gymnastics. "just think of yourself as a sacrificial lamb," he tells mmb shortly before calling him "brother" and kissing him on the mouth. he menacingly stands in the middle of a rainy road in the middle of the night, reciting nursery rhymes, waiting to cause a car accident. i think it kills one of the magic boys. he definitely kills another guy, and kidnaps the mmb's "love interest" before setting a building on fire. i don't even remember the details. everyone fucking sucked. i thought about this insanity of a film for a week straight.

if you made it til here and think "i want to see what this is", don't. i can guarantee my summary of this movie was more entertaining than the actual film. if you want a small bite that doesn't taste of cardboard and bile, i can highly recommend this video of interviews intercut with some of the scenes (do yourself a favour and turn on the captions), and this fanfic that continues the story in a coherent way and in that accomplishes more than the film ever did. thank you.

this is about one and a half times the length of my wip.

#ren 🐝 #nika's answers #nika rambles #unhinged commentary #god this movie (derogatory)

[twistedtummies2]

Top 20 Musical Theatre Villains

Okay, so, I know I’ve only just started my month-long “Count-Down” of my favorite versions of Dracula, but this idea was bugging me, and I decided to make a description-less list of it just for yucks. Is that so wrong? I hope not... Anyway...if you know me, then you know I love musicals. And of course, so often in musicals, the most fun characters are...well...what they are in so many things, to be honest: the villains. The thing about villains in musical theatre is they sort of bring out the wonderful, fun, dark side of what makes the musical genre what it is. The idea behind how these things work is that the characters are expressing their deepest emotions and motivations through song, and while you can get many positive ideas across with that, the bad guys of these shows prove to us that, even in a world where it’s apparently the norm to get up and dance like you just don’t care, there will always be people who have dark emotions and dark thoughts that are just as powerful as the rest. Musical Villains run the gamut in terms of how they work: some are funny, some are threatening, some sing a whole lot, some only get a few key musical moments to their name, but they all serve some sort of function and play a vital role in the proceedings. So, I decided to do a quick tribute and talk about some of my favorites in musical theatre. Now, a couple of basic rules: Rule Number One, I’ll only be counting characters who I, personally, perceive to be VILLAINS in these stories. For example, Inspector Javert from Les Miserables is the main antagonist, but I don’t really consider Javert to be a VILLAIN in the truest sense. Sweeney Todd and Mrs. Lovett are both far from the nicest folks around, but I think of them more as dark protagonists than the villains in their stories. In both these cases, there are other characters who are much more obviously in line with the typical way we think a villain should be, anyway. Rule Number Two: I won’t be counting villains from musicals based on movies, such as the number of Disney Villains who appear in stage shows, or characters like Beetlejuice and the Child Catcher. They’re great villains, but I want to talk about “stage exclusive” villains. There will be a few exceptions, and these are in cases where the musical is more popular or well-known than the original movie source: most people don’t know about the old black-and-white movie “Little Shop of Horrors,” but a whole lot of people know the musical and its own movie adaptation. On that note, I won’t be talking about music MOVIE villains, such as Lucifer from The Devil’s Carnival or Oogie Boogie from The Nightmare Before Christmas. These guys have to basically be born onstage. There will be ONE exception to the rule...kind of...but not really. XD With all that in mind, here are My Top 20 Musical Theatre Villains.

20. Evillene the Wicked Witch of the West, from The Wiz.

19. Miss Andrew, from Mary Poppins: The Musical. (I’m counting her because, even though the musical is semi-based on the movie, this character never APPEARED in the movie, unlike other Disney Musical Villains, like Frollo, Scar, or Ursula. Miss Andrew is only found in the stage show...and the P.L. Travers books, I suppose.)

18. Velma Von Tussle, from Hairspray.

17. Jud Fry, from Oklahoma!

16. Caiaphas & Annas, from Jesus Christ Superstar.

15. Hades, from Hadestown.

14. Mayzie LaBird, from Seussical.

13. Madame Morrible, from Wicked.

12. Dr. Frank-N-Furter, from Rocky Horror (Picture) Show.

11. Mr. Applegate, from Damn Yankees!

10. Mr. Hyde, from Jekyll & Hyde.

9. Aaron Burr, from Hamilton. (Hey, he outright admits to being “the villain in your history;” I say he counts, no matter how much we love him.)

8. Captain Hook, from Peter Pan.

7. Audrey II, from Little Shop of Horrors. (And yes, to those who know me on this site...this plant makes me VERY blushy and shivery and all that stuff. >///> )

6. Fagin, from Oliver!

5. The Thenardiers, from Les Miserables.

4. The Mad Hatter, from Wonderland. (Specifically as played by Kate Shindle; others who have played the Hatter, and the ways the Hatter has been handled in those versions, are okay...but this one is just EPIC.)

3. Judge Turpin, from Sweeney Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street.

2. Miss Hannigan, from Annie.

1. Erik, a.k.a. The Phantom, from The Phantom of the Opera.

#broadway #musicals #musical theatre #theatre #villains #favorites #list #meme #countdown #top 20 #musical villains

[hutchhitched]

And training has begun. Our favorite duo is impressing the gamemakers and learning to tie knots. How very non-domestic of them. Here are thoughts and musings on Chapter 7 for @everlarkedalways​ THG reread.

 Currently, I’m reading a book called Jesus and John Wayne, by Kristin Kobes Du Mez. The general thesis of the book is that white evangelicalism is obsessed with patriarchy and masculinity and celebrates that rather than emphasizing the gentler, more peaceful teachings of Jesus Christ. (While I have some issues with the larger historical study, I don’t particularly disagree with her thesis. Her book is the most gendered studies of American evangelical Christianity I’ve read in a long, long time.) A friend from work invited me to an online discussion group about the book with some friends of hers and the topic of gender roles played prominently in our conversation. Mostly, I kept thinking about portrayals of Katniss and Peeta and how those have sparked debates and arguments over Peeta’s masculinity or lack thereof.

 Peeta is strong, but he’s an artist, a painter, and a baker. He’s gentle and compassionate and kind, and he’s in love with Katniss. He’s been emotionally and physically abused by his mother, and he knows brute strength can’t help him win the game because Katniss will die if he tries. He makes a decision to protect her, but to do it behind the scenes. He can’t puff up his chest and kill the people who want her dead, so he does it by sacrificing himself for her long before they’re in the area. As such, many critics of the series (more so the movies than the books, I believe), including the actors themselves, often referred to Peeta as the damsel in distress who has to be saved by Katniss.

 There is a fundamental lack of critical examination in those interpretations of Peeta’s character. He is the epitome of non-toxic masculinity, but there is a rejection of that by society. Remember the Gillette commercial a few years ago that showed men being kind and gentle? Remember the backlash from it? Society is obsessed with strength and violence, and looks down on men who aren’t hypermasculine and/or show what are considered “feminine” qualities. In other words, Peeta has been emasculated.

 In the book itself, Peeta’s mother emasculates him by brow-beating him into submission and running her family with an iron fist. Mrs. Mellark is a strong woman, and in this context, that’s not a good thing. She’s overbearing and a “witch,” according to Katniss. She’s taken power away from her husband, evidenced by him not buying squirrels from Katniss unless Mrs. Mellark is absent. She’s also taken Peeta’s self-esteem and self-worth away by abusing him and telling him she thinks Katniss is a survivor, implicating that Peeta is not.

 Historically, masculinity has played a significant role in the development of the United States. White masculinity was codified in a series of laws in colonial Virginia in the seventeenth century, and southern masculinity was glorified and adulated during the antebellum period and beyond. Non-white men were emasculated in order to highlight the power of white men. Some examples:

Traditional gender roles in European societies centered on men providing for the family by owning land, farming, running an estate and so on while women’s roles were to work within the home. Rich men hunted for leisure (think fox hunting in packs, hunting quail, that kind of thing). Traditional gender roles for many Native American groups included women farming and gathering, while men hunted. Europeans believed Native American men were lazy because they played all the time (went out in hunting parties), while the women worked the fields. As a result, Native American men were emasculated and had their power stripped by European colonizers.

Africans who were enslaved were not allowed to legally marry under the system of slavery. Despite that, slave owners encouraged their slaves to “marry” (lived together as man and wife without the legal protections that entailed) because enslaved men who were married tended to be better workers due to fear that their wives and/or children would be punished if they rebelled or misbehaved. They had no control over their own families because enslaved peoples could be sold at any time at the whim of their owners (fathers sold away from wives and children or vice versa). In addition, white men often raped female slaves in order to a) terrorize the enslaved and b) impregnate the women who would give birth to more slaves. In addition, matrilineal succession was codified in a series of laws that ensured the offspring of an enslaved woman would follow the mother, not the father. That allowed white men to enslave their own offspring without consequence, and it emasculated male slaves in numerous ways. For example, enslaved men were not allowed to protect their spouses from being raped; enslaved men were not able to pass on their family names due to matrilineal succession; and enslaved men frequently had “wives” with children from another male. Each of those methods took power away from black men and put it in the hands of whites.

In 1676, Nathaniel Bacon asked for permission to raise a militia to fight a group of Native Americans who he believed had attacked his land. The governor refused permission, so Bacon did it anyway. He mustered yeomen farmers (poor white landowners), indentured servants (often Irish or poorer English contract workers), and slaves (African men). With this group, he challenged the wealthy white men in colonial Virginia.

What does all this mean? Peeta is a male with characteristics that are typically viewed as feminine (point 1), who is forced against his will to perform/work for the wealthy and privileged (point 3), and is unable to protect the woman he loves from harm (point 2). In other words, Peeta has been emasculated by Panem’s government and society.

 Please don’t read this as me saying Peeta is not masculine. I personally don’t hold to this idea that men have to engage in toxic masculinity in order to be male. My personal preference is a man who is compassionate and caring and nurturing. What I’m saying is I understand why people can read Peeta as weak, even if I don’t happen to agree that his characteristics are effeminate.

 Collins presents Katniss as a scared, angry, determined girl who engages in activities that aren’t necessarily feminine. Hunting and killing game, trading, and so on are very different activities than most of the women in Panem. She is, figuratively, bringing home the bacon and the primary breadwinner (ha!) for her family. Her role as a strong and independent and working against traditional gender roles is celebrated while Peeta’s are criticized. I find that fascinating. It’s kind of like it seems normal for women to dress in pants and t-shirts, but Harry Styles can’t wear a dress without causing an uproar. Oh, the double standard.

 I won’t get into how the movies and press marketed Katniss as a badass warrior. Let’s just say it pisses me off and absolutely misses the point of the books in my opinion.

 One last point since I’m headlong into gender theory here. Katniss and Peeta work as a team, equal partners as they negotiate their way through training. Collins seems to be a proponent of men and women carrying equal loads in relationships, and I’m here for it. Peeta doesn’t look down on Katniss as someone who needs to be protected (although he wants to protect her in any way he can), and Katniss doesn’t allow Peeta to make all the decisions for them. They work together, and it’s a beautiful thing. They have no idea the effect they have…on me when they do that. It’s my life’s goal to find someone who wants to be with me because I’m capable and not someone to be rescued. Katniss can rescue her own damn self, and I’m here for it.

 Okay, I’m behind again, but I’ll get there. If you’ve read all this, thank you for your consideration!

#thgagain #the hunger games #the hunger games meta #i did not proofread #my apologies for any mistakes and typos #i'll fix them at some point

[sada-siva-sanyaasi]

Stains - Part 9

Series Summary: An artist goes through a lot of things, sure, but having to deal with her ex on a constant basis wasn’t something she signed up for.

Words: 3,625 words.

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Reader (Modern!AU)

A/N: Words under the cut. Also been a long long time, eh? I honestly had a rough patch these last few months, and also didn’t have my laptop with me to update even though I had written, so I apologise a thousand times. I am so so sorry everyone! Hope the next few weeks of updates and story can make up for my loss of inspiration! Love you always, and as usual, feedback of all forms is greatly appreciated!

Series Masterlist / Twitter Profiles | Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Part 6 | Part 7 | Part 8 |

 Y/N watched Peter walk into the building and sighed to herself, running a hand through her hair. “Okay, this is it, you dropped your toddler now you go shooting.” She didn’t realise how long she was just sitting inside until she heard someone honking behind her, making her snap back and drive on.

Each step she took towards the studio was heavier than the one before, her heart racing and her hands shivering. Y/N stopped in front of the door and let out a shaky breath, cracking her knuckles. “It’s just another project, why am I getting so worked up? Fucking relax, Y/N, this is not a big deal. This is like every other project you’ve had with models.”

“Although I don’t mind the whole ‘talking-to-yourself’ thing,” Y/N jumped and turned around to see Loki stand there, a smile on his face, “do it inside the studio while you’re setting things up, won’t you? That way no one stares at you like you’re a weirdo.”

Y/N beamed and smacked Loki’s shoulder, a small yelp escaping his mouth. “Good morning, Loki. I was just giving myself a pep talk. It’s a shoot for Tony Stark, right?” Loki hummed, opening the door and ushering her in while they set their stuff down.

“Yeah, someone you already shot for if I remember. And you shot him too,” Loki added, making Y/N close her mouth and turn away with a scowl. “So I really don’t see why you’re getting so sweaty. Unless of course, it’s because your ex is coming here.”

Y/N stopped fixing her lens and turned to Loki, who looked busy setting up the lights. “How do you know so much?” Loki snickered and walked to his laptop, noticing more support staff walk in. “I just am very observant, my dear. Especially with your Twitter shenanigans, it’s hard not to know really. I think even Thor knows, I heard him laugh at your tweet for about ten god-awful minutes.”

Y/N grimaced and connected the main camera to Loki’s laptop, a hot red blush spreading across her cheeks. “We do not speak of my Twitter shenanigans, Laufeyson. It’s a dark subject.” Loki rolled his eyes and smirked, bowing in front of Y/N just as Thor walked in. “My humblest apologies, oh revered one.”

Y/N smacked Loki again and both of them laughed as they greeted Thor, settling down in their chairs. “When will the models get here?” Thor huffed, looking at his watch, and Y/N rolled her eyes.

“They’ll have to get here, set up, dress up, and pose. Oh it’s a long day, and it’s only day one. There’s five more days till we go back to shooting other things again.” Y/N frowned, biting her nails as she looked up.

“Wait, what are we shooting for again?”

Loki and Thor burst out laughing, Thor even leaning forward to ruffle Y/N’s hair. “Are you sure you’re the photographer and not just an assistant, Y/N? We are doing endorsement shoots for today and tomorrow while the rest of the three days will be personalized shoots of the models.” Y/N’s scowl deepened as she stared at the door.

“Oh God I’m regretting these shoots already.” The doors opened and her breath hitched, only to see people with makeup kits walk in, and she stood up angrily.

“Oh, they’re taking so long! I’ll go get a coffee, you want something?” The brothers shook their heads and she walked out, stuffing her hands into her pockets and humming under her breath.

As she walked into the Stark cafeteria and waited in the queue, she heard an all too familiar voice laugh. “Oh I know, Bucky has made it his life mission to screw himself up in front of the world. Now he bullshits about Tony’s work, what an idiot. Jesus, my head hurts whenever he decides to use his brain. Ow, what the fuck!” “I’m standing right beside you, asshole.”

Y/N bit her lip to stop the laugh from leaving her mouth and silently stepped towards the counter. “I’d like a chocolate cappuccino with two shots of espresso and extra chocolate please.” The barista looked up and smiled. “Long day ahead? It’ll be $3.50 please,” She said, and Y/N smiled, nodding.

“Almost never ending, and here you go.” Y/N’s smile widened when she got a sandwich along as the barista winked at her. “It’s on us, hope you a great day.”

She turned and nearly bumped into a person when two strong arms wrapped around her, holding her steady. “Easy there, coffee girl.” A smooth voice said, and Y/N froze entirely, her blood turning cold. “Don’t call me that, Barnes,” she mumbled, looking up, and Bucky smirked. “Why not, Y/N? Wasn’t that how we met?” She glared at him and gestured towards the drink in her hand. “Want to get drenched in something hot again?”

Bucky stepped back from her, still not letting go. “No, I don’t think you would voluntarily drench me in that chocolate-y coffee goodness. I know you enough to know you love your coffee a lot, and that it costed a lot too.” Y/N huffed and sipped her drink, her eyes closing momentarily when the hot liquid flooded her mouth.

“Yeah, you’re right. I wouldn’t, but I would like to go now, so if you leave me.” Bucky hummed, his grip not faltering a bit. “No, I don’t think I will let you go, Y/N. you and I need to go to the same place anyway, and I like holding you, it’s been a while.”

Y/N’s eyes widened and she noticed Pietro behind them, waving and grinning at her as Bucky ushered her to the studio.

“Fucking let me go, asshole!” She barked, not caring about how many people were looking at them, and Bucky rolled his eyes. “Oh, hush child. We have the same destination, and so I’m making this journey along with you.”

Y/N mumbled a soft “what the fuck” as Pietro opened the doors and bowed down, allowing Bucky and Y/N to walk in. She finally shook him off and stormed over to Loki and Thor, setting her coffee down. Loki watched as she cracked her knuckles and bent forward, picking her sandwich and taking a bite of it.

“You said you didn’t want anything!” Y/N hissed and he shrugged. “With how that lady just ate our brains, I got a little hungry. I’m not sorry,” She looked around and her scowl deepened, fist clenched.

“The witch has already arrived, I see.” Loki nodded, his hand creeping towards her coffee only for it to be smacked away.

“Alright,” Y/N yelled, walking to the models in the middle of the room, “let’s get this show on the road. We got three hours today, and I want them to count. Get dressed, you’re having shoots with products.”

 --

 “No, I don’t like the shade of lipstick; don’t you think it’s too dull? How about blood red?” Dolores said, looking through the makeup as Y/N sighed out loud for the tenth time, sipping her coffee.

“How is your coffee still not over?”  Thor said, sitting beside her, and she glanced at him. “I’m trying not to finish it so that I’m busy till she decides to end our misery and just model. Jesus Christ, this is why I hate shooting with living creatures, such monsters.”

Thor coughed to cover up his laugh when Dolores shot a glare in their direction, and Loki leaned towards her. “When will you tell her this is a monochrome shoot?” he whispered, and Y/N turned to him, a coy smile on her face.

“I want to see how long it takes before she figures it out on her own.” Both of them grinned at each other and Y/N turned, only for her breath to be snatched right out of her lungs.

Bucky stood a couple feet away from her, his hairstylist fixing him up as he unbuttoned the top part of his shirt, checking himself out in the mirror. She didn’t want to admit it, but he looked like he dropped straight from heaven.

“He looks good, huh?” Pietro said, making her jump and turn to scowl at him. “What did you say?” Pietro smirked, “You heard me,” Y/N rolled her eyes and finished her coffee when Bucky said, “I heard that its monochrome today.”

She nodded, picking her camera and fiddling with it.

“Well, what colour is it, then?”

“What colour is the background, Barnes?”

“Black.”

“Your clothes?”

“Black and white.”

“Bingo.”

Dolores stopped applying her blush and glared at Y/N. “You’re telling me that after I spent twenty minutes trying to pick out the right shade of lipstick for this cream dress?!”

Y/N stared at Dolores. “Did you bother checking with me if you needed blood red lipstick and coral blush? He asked me, I told him. You should’ve asked me, Miss Smith. Would’ve saved you and us a lot of time.”

Dolores continued to glare at her as Y/N stood up and said, “I hope you’re ready. Your products have been placed there; we will be going with you first. Loki, I need you to set a diffuser over the light falling from the top and Thor, a reflector to the left please. Let’s get this done with.”

Bucky watched as Loki and Thor stepped away from Y/N while she knelt forward, looking into her camera. She adjusted the lens and tucked a strand of hair behind her ear, scrunching her nose a little as she said, “Thor, move closer. Dolores, adjust your position a little to the left, chin higher in the air, thank you. And smile, don’t smirk.”

A smile unknowingly made its way onto Bucky’s face, his heart feeling light as he kept watching her. It had been three years since he spent so long with Y/N, and he was more than happy that he was getting to see her like this. Emotions and memories he kept buried for years resurfaced, his chest tightening as he remembered the little things about her.

Pietro watched Bucky, and scoffed silently. “Bro, you are whipped. I bet you even know what’s happening in her head.”

“She’s not happy with how Dolores is posing, she’s constantly correcting her but her eyebrows are still furrowed and her tongue is not sticking out yet. It shows she’s angry, not concentrating.  Y/N will stand up and walk to correct Dolores and her posture anytime now.”

Not long after the words left Bucky’s mouth Y/N stood up, walking to Thor and angling the reflector before murmuring to Dolores, moving her hands and adjusting her. Bucky’s smile turned smug as Pietro stared at him, shock on his face. “Did you fucking study this girl? How do you know so much after so long?”

Bucky’s eyes never left Y/N as she set Dolores’s hair, rambling about the position of the fans beside them. “Fall in love, Pietro. You won’t forget what makes them who they are that easily. Look, her tongue is peeking out, she’s finally satisfied and she’s concentrating.” Pietro turned to where Bucky was pointing and chuckled, noticing how he was indeed right about Y/N yet again.

“You really love her, huh.” Bucky’s smile softened and he sighed, nodding. “I do. I didn’t prove it to her then, and I don’t know if she’ll believe me now. But I won’t give up, not after I have her right in front of me.”

“For five more days, Buck. You don’t even know if you’ll see her again. And you can’t make someone fall in love with you for the second time in so little time.” Bucky frowned, looking down as his stylist walked over to him, checking his outfit. “I could tell her the truth,” he mumbled, almost a whisper. “And then what? She’ll magically let you back into her life?”

Bucky turned to Pietro, who stared right back at him. “I’m serious, Buck. You think she’ll just let you back? Do you remember the look on her face that day?”

 Flashback

 Tears made their way down Y/N’s cheeks as she took in the scene in front of her, Dolores on top of Bucky and her hands on his chest. “S-So all of this, whatever Natasha told me, it’s true? I thought she was doing it out of spite, Bucky.”

Bucky pushed Dolores off him and stood up, the stench of alcohol from him reaching Y/N immediately. He looked at her; eyes swollen and cheeks red as she struggled to contain her sobs. The fight seemed like it happened so long ago, neither of them remembered what it was really about, but it had gotten out of hand. The people around them faded, non-existent and not mattering. “Just tell me it’s not real, James. I’ll believe you. Not Natasha, not Dolores, nobody. Please,” she whispered, stepping towards him only for him to step back.

“I think you need to leave and stop assuming things, Y/N. I’m drunk, and not in my senses.” Bucky mumbled, loud enough for her to hear every word. “So, that’s it? It’s the end?” She laughed, the sound hollow.

“Did it ever begin?” Bucky hissed, and Y/N looked like she had been slapped. “A year, Barnes.” She croaked, her nails digging into her skin. “We were together for a year and friends for two years before that. And you tell me none of it was real? I was in love with you, for this? Fuck you, James Barnes. I don’t want to ever see your face again.”

“Oh, the feeling’s mutual sweetheart.” Bucky said, turning back to the counter and grabbing his beer. Y/N turned and left, slamming the door shut behind her and Bucky slumped into his seat, tears leaving his eyes. Dolores rubbed his shoulder in comfort only for him to swat it away harshly. “Get out, Dot. I don’t want you.”

Dolores scowled, biting her lip.

“Here?”

“Ever. Out.”

 End of Flashback

 Bucky rubbed his head as Y/N said, “Alright, we’re done here! You can go change, Dolores. If the boys step forward, it’ll be great,” and stepped forward, watching her thrust props into his hands. “Hold these and pose right,” she mumbled, turning to leave when he grabbed her hands.

“I’d rather hold you, if I’m being honest.” He tugged her closer and smirked when Y/N pulled away, blushing profusely. “Shut the fuck up,” she seethed, glaring at him, and he bent forward to her level, tilting his head.

“Make me, sweetheart,” Bucky’s eyes went to her lips and his smirk widened when Y/N stepped away, calling his stylist to set his suit. Pietro sighed and elbowed Bucky, shooting a sharp glare. “Stop being a flirt, you’ll scare her away, asshole.”

Bucky rolled his eyes and punched Pietro’s shoulder. “You shut up, Maximoff. Don’t teach me how to get my girl back.”

Pietro watched Y/N talk to Loki, pointing at the lights and camera and rolled his eyes, grumbling, “What a cocky bastard.”

 --

 “Today was a long day,” Y/N sighed, falling into her chair and looking through her laptop at the pictures taken. “Longer than we wanted, Dolores spent so long getting ready. Wow, all ladies like this?” Thor grumbled, chugging his coffee.

“Slow down Thor, that’s not beer.” Loki chided, shaking his head and sitting closer to Y/N. “We were supposed to finish shoot in three hours, took us four and half because Atomic Blonde kept complaining about her fat face and wrong angles, what a drama queen.” Y/N chuckled and went on to making basic edits in the pictures, before sitting back. “Be careful with your words, Loki,” she said, nodding towards the models walking to them. “I heard drama queens have powerful ears, especially around things they shouldn’t hear.” Bucky and Pietro got their chairs and sat down, Pietro beside Loki and Bucky squeezing in between Loki and Y/N.

Dolores spared Y/N a glance before dragging a chair and sitting down in front of her, as if trying to squeeze herself between Y/N and Bucky. Y/N cleared her throat awkwardly and said, “Uh, I need to see the laptop Dolores, and you sitting here is making it impossible to do so. I need to show the final results to the other two models too, you’re not the only one.”

Dolores shot her a glare before pushing her laptop back a little, and Y/N rubbed her face. She stood up and grabbed the laptop, setting it down in her lap and turning to Bucky and Pietro.

“Since these are mostly close up shots focusing on the products, not a lot of your face is in the pictures, and we will be shooting in colours as well tomorrow. I hope you’re ready for it.”

Dolores scowled and looked into the laptop. “Don’t you think my angles are bad? My face looks swollen in these.” Pietro snorted. “That’s because you got here hungover.”

Loki coughed in a poor attempt to stop laughing while Thor made no such attempt, making Dolores fume. “You talk like you look great, Maximoff.”

Bucky rolled his eyes while Y/N said, “Please, he’s a Maximoff. He’s hotter than you and five generations of your family.” “I’m sorry; I think I need a minute. Can I hug you, Y/N?” Pietro said, while Bucky shot him a glare.

“Not now Maximoff, see your pictures and then you can.” Y/N kept scrolling through her laptop as Loki raised his eyebrows, looking at the pictures. “Your pictures look fabulous, Barnes.” He remarked, and Bucky smirked, resting his head on Y/N’s shoulder. “I’ll have to thank the hot photographer for that. She seemed to have paid special attention to-” “-the product, that’s why the pictures look great. All of them do, and if you guys have any problem with how you look, go to Loki. He’s doing the editing. And get your head off my shoulder, Barnes.”  

Bucky stared at Y/N and mumbled, “I never noticed, you have a double chin.” Y/N’s hand crept to her jaw as she turned to Bucky, whose head was still on her shoulder. “What the fuck is wrong with you? Get off me, please.” He shook his head, nuzzling closer to her and said, “I don’t want to.”

Y/N huffed, reluctantly settling into her seat to make it more comfortable for him. She didn’t know why she was doing it, but she did. Bucky smiled to himself, slowly wrapping his arms around her too.

Loki and Thor looked at them, and then turned to each other, eyebrows raised, before shrugging and standing up. “Who wants coffee?” Thor asked, and Bucky grabbed Y/N’s hand and raised it, while Pietro nodded and Dolores shook her head in disgust.

“I’d like a green tea; coffee is so bad for health.” Pietro scoffed, rolling his eyes. “Yes, and getting shit-faced is not, Dolores. Come on, let’s go get coffee. What’s your order, Y/N and Bucky?”

“I’ll have a black coffee, Y/N will have a cap-” “I’ll have a café mocha, and I’m coming with you.” Y/N, with surprising gentleness, lifted Bucky’s head off her shoulder and stood up, brushing his arms off her.

She glanced down at him and bit her lip, before walking towards Loki. Bucky sighed and stood up, watching her. “Looks like some stuff did change in three years. She hated mochas before.”

Dolores rolled her eyes and glared at him. “You’re hung up on her even now? After three years?” Bucky stared at her.

“Well what else should I do, move on with you? I didn’t realise I had such a splendid option available.” Bucky pushed past Dolores and she scowled, stomping her feet. “Three years later, and nothing fucking changed.”

 --

 “See you tomorrow, gentlemen.” Y/N smiled and hugged Thor, before moving to Loki. “Send me one picture after editing it so that I know how it’ll turn out.” “Yeah I know, stop doubting my abilities.” He pulled her into a hug and sighed. “You know Barnes is trying hard, right?” He mumbled, and she pulled away slightly, her gaze unsure. “I know, and I also know what I saw that day. He didn’t stop her then, Loki.”

“And he doesn’t spare her a glance now, Y/N.” Her gaze hardened. “Once a cheater, always a cheater. Doesn’t matter how hard he tries to be different now. People don’t change, Loki.”

“But people change people, Y/N.” Loki sighed, rubbing his face. “You’ve known him for three years, and you’ve been away from him for three years. He must really miss you if he’s trying so hard even after you dumped whatever was in your hand on him.”

Y/N chuckled and shook her head, stepping away from him. “Whatever you say, Loki. Dolores is still stuck to him, see?”

Dolores was indeed stuck to Bucky, blabbering on as he stared at her with disinterest and discomfort. Pietro was watching their interaction and trying not to laugh, albeit unsuccessfully.

Loki rolled his eyes. “She’s trying to get you jealous, and you’re letting it work.” Thor nodded, munching on a cookie. “I’m sorry, where did you get that cookie from?” Thor grinned sheepishly, shrugging. “The barista found me hot.”

Loki nodded, pulling two cookies out of his pocket. “She gave me two.” He smirked, only for it to fall when Y/N pulled a croissant from her bag. “Complimentary goods from the chef, many more inside. Back down, peasants. Anyways, even if Dolores is trying to make me jealous, it’s not working.”

Thor patted her shoulder and shook his head. “You said her name and crushed the top of your bag. Like heck it’s not working.”

“Fine, she’s making me jealous and annoyed. What about it?”

Loki smirked and looked at his brother, who was wiping cookie crumbs off his face. “What are we here for?”

---

Taglist Open!

@buckybarnesishot310​​ @kmuir1​​ @divainthesun​​ @valeriiaaass​​ @manic-creator​​ @mrsrusso11​​ @klinenovakwinchester​​ @roleplay-multifandom​​ @bonkyboinkybucky​​ @sexyvixen7​​ @lostrandomfangirl​​ @jayparker2319​​ @qualitycherryblossombouquet​​ @gallaghergirl223​​ @dee-vn​​ @hailmary-yramliah​​ @thomasthetankson​​ @supernaturalwintersoldier​​ @sstanbarnes​​ @bondiebae​​ @brattypeony​​ @sunflowergirl522​​ @peaches-roses-sins​​ @justab-eautifulmess​​ @winchester-wife​​ @varikasnuori​​ @truequeenofnightmares @deputy-orange-juice​​ @witchything​​ @pessimystic-fangirl​​ @boinkybarnesleftarm​​ @thegayseance​​

 Permanent Tags:

@shurisneakers​ @revengingbarnes​ @sgtjbuccky​ @bluecookies-and-ink​ @thegirlinthegreenscarf​ @a-kpop-know-it-all​ @jaamesbbarnes​ @heystobitbeach​​ @i-love-superhero​ @heartbeats-wildly​ @jurassicbarnes​​ @capsiclesdoll​​ @psychicforest​​ @heyiamthatbitch​​ @lumar014​​ @delicatetrasheagle​​ @connie326​​

#bucky barnes #bucky barnes x reader #bucky x reader #bucky series #stains series #bucky angst #bucky barnes angst #bucky fluff #bucky barnes fluff #bucky smut #bucky barnes smut #bucky social media au #bucky barnes social media au #steve rogers #sam wilson #tony stark #peter parker #mj watson #wanda maximoff #pietro maximoff #loki laufeyson #thor odinson #marvel x reader #avengers x reader #avengers smau #twitter au #insta au #natasha romanoff #marvel smau #avengers

[slashingdisneypasta]

Can you do a headcanon where a disney villain wakes up as the opposite gender one day and how they would react towards that? The villains you can use are Lady Tremaine, Gaston, Cayton, Captain hook, Frollo, Maleficent, Cruella de vil, and jafar. I am a fan of the disney villain stuff on your blog and I wish you a swell day!

Hey! ^^ Glad you like it!! I hope you enjoy these as much (: ^^

also, KARMA HAS SPOKEN.

In addition to now having completely different bodies, Gaston and Frollo will also be experiencing their first menstrual cycles. And Cruella and Lady Tremaine will have raging erections. Everyone else is just experiencing new genitalia and breast sizes though.

Warnings: Well, this includes a lot of description and stuff about biological genitalia (And other general bodily functions like periods and erections).  

~~~

Captain Hook:

·         Jesus christ, if he’s done the maths right, this means there’s one more sticky-outty appendage for that damned boy to slice off and feed to the crocodile.

·         Seriously though, he just goes with it mostly, after the first few minutes of shock. Like, he lives on an island with mermaids, fairies and flying children that literally try to kill him and he’s constantly being hunted by a ravenous, obsessed crocodile. Just add this to the long, long list of reasons why he’s crazy and tired.

·         Just goes on with his day and his plans to get rid of Peter.

Clayton:

·         Refuses to believe that what he sees and feels is real and tries to go about his work ignoring Jane and Mr Porter trying to tell him its real and trying to figure out together how this happened, what to do now, and how to fix it.

·         Will later tell this story (That he woke up completely normal one morning and his travel companions had gone mad from drinking sea water and started telling him he had suddenly grown breasts, a bubble butt and female genitalia, of course.) to people as an amusing anecdote to impress them and make himself the most interesting man in the room, despite his lacklustre response to it.

·         Jane is so exasperated and done with this man when she tries to give him advice about giving his chest area some support to help the pain and he just laughs her off.

·         He wraps up his chest in bandages (Tightly), secretly, because it is killing him having them jiggle around on him all day. (EDIT: Binding with bandages can apparently damage your ribs. Okay, proceed)

·         Psst. Jane knows

Cruella DeVille:

·         She wakes up with an odd, strained feeling in her genitalia area (I don’t know what a boner feels like for the one enduring it, I’m sorry! Aha), sits up in annoyance, rips back her blankets and s c r e e c h e s.

·         WHAT is THAT THING!?

·         What is that thing???!

·         WHAT!?

·         She tries to get up and away from it, but it’s attached to her and she pulls up her nightie to see and promptly shoves her nightie back down. No, no. She’s a busy woman. This is not happening, it can’t be happening. Impossible!

·         But, I’ve heard an erection is p r e t t y hard to ignore.

·         She tries everything to get rid of it. Pushing it back down (I assume that hurts, or is at least quite uncomfortable), taking deep breaths and trying to calm down, taking a shower at varying temperatures, waiting it out… but, unfortunately, nothing works.

·         Finally, she groans and sits back. “Fine!”

·         Cruella will get the job done, if it means she can get on with her day and find a way to fix this. See a doctor, or something.

Frollo:

·         Oh my god. 1. Its shocking enough for him to wake up with feminine… uh… growths on his chest, and a slit between his legs rather then a penis.

·         But he’s also got black, clotted, smelly blood coating his thighs and ruining his favourite, white, night shirt.

·         Frollo probably doesn’t even know about menstruation, honestly. Jeez. And if he did, previously, know about it then  he probably had something totally sexist and awful to say about it like that ‘Only witches’ or ‘Satanists’ bleed from their nether regions.

·         So he’s disgusted, and h o r r i f i e d.

Gaston:

·         Well, of course at first he’s shocked and furious, because where did his manly, manly chest hair go (He does still have some on his breasts of course, the female body gets it too, but its not nearly enough)?? And his deep, deep voice!? What’s going on!? Why??

·         But after the initial shock, once he’s convinced himself that this is dream, you can bet that he checks himself out and decides he’s the most beautiful woman ever and if he could, he would marry himself.

·         … then he gets his period, and terrible cramps…

·         And suddenly he chokes on all that shit that he (Of course would have) said about cramps ‘not actually being that bad’ and ‘women just overreacting’. 

·         Gets quickly into the habit of grasping his boobs for comfort.

Jafar:

·         Honestly, he’s very like Hook in this scenario. How wonderful, he says sarcastically, rolling his eyes deeply and growling at the mirror when his eyes adjust in the morning.

·         He goes about his day like normal, ignoring weird looks or responding to quips from nobles with snarky looks of his own, because he’s a very busy man and he can deal with this later.

·         I wouldn’t put it past him to get some work done with certain difficult nobles using his womanly wow’s while he has them. I mean, what does he care if he’s being immodest? (Or dishonest, for that matter. But we all know how little cares about being dishonest. It is a non-issue) Its not his real body, and it works.

Lady Tremaine:

·         How completely inconvenient.

·         Tremaine has had a husband (Possibly more) so while she doesn’t know why she has one right now, she is quite aware of what a penis looks like and why it looks like the Eifel Tower in the morning.

·         And its very inconvenient for her. Who knows how long this will take to fix. It was fine to deal with when it was her husband, but she isn’t attracted to herself, so… Ugh.

·         (Time to whip out that erotic novel under her bed!)

·         She isn’t particularly shocked though. I don’t think Tremaine gets shocked.

Maleficent:

·         Hm, very nice…

·         She’s magic! She’s not too horrified when she finds the penis there instead of her vagina, but she is pleasantly surprised at her length. Not too shabby. Not too shabby at all!

·         She’ll work on correcting the issue all day until she achieves success, and then learns how to switch between the two biological statuses at will, because she actually decided she enjoys both.

[hookedonapirate]

Trick or Treat

A/N: It feels so great to post again. I've been in a writing slump for several weeks now, so I wanted to write something short and sweet to get the writing juices flowing. Thank you @hollyethecurious for your ideas for the premise and @darkcolinodonorgasm for Killian’s costume!

Rated: Teen and up for mature language

“Well, that’s disturbing.” Emma grimaces at the zombie gnome with gnarly teeth, reaching out with dirt and blood covered hands like he's coming out of the ground to get them. Even though it's not real, the graphics are enough to give a kid nightmares.

 “That’s so cool, Mommy!”

 Well, any kid who’s not her seven-year-old son that is. Henry runs down the sidewalk, his oversized hat falling off his head. He’s a ball of energy most days, but tonight, he’s extra energetic, and he hasn’t even had any candy yet.

 “Kid, your hat!” She follows after him, picking up his hat from the winding walkway which is lined with jack-o'-lanterns on each side. But as she passes each one, she’s surprised when she realizes these aren’t just typical jack-o'-lanterns with a mouth, nose and eyes carved into them. No, these are intricately crafted jack-o'-lanterns. One is carved into a haunted house, one is a graveyard full of ghosts, another looks like a skull from afar, but up close, it appears to be carved into long stem mushrooms and grass. Her favorite is the pumpkin carving that mimics a scene from the Nightmare Before Christmas. 

 Like seriously, who has time to carve out all these pumpkins? And why weren’t the Jack-o'-lanterns on display as she had seen at the Night of 1,000 Jack-o'-lanterns at the Chicago Botanic Garden? Whoever carved these has some ridiculous artistic talent. They are also way too into Halloween, because their yard is all decked out. There are games set up on tables in the yard, skeletons and ghosts hanging from the trees and tombstone yard signs all over. 

 As she walks up the steps to the house, fake fog sweeps around her feet, the porch is covered in fake cobwebs with large spiders and the porch railing is lined with decorated jars, “potions”, skulls and other Halloween themed knickknacks. She laughs at the potion bottle labeled, “love potion.” When she reaches the door, which is wide open, a group of kids in cute costumes gathered around waiting for treats, she’s expecting the three looney witches from Hocus Pocus to emerge from the house. 

 When a man in a black top hat, tailcoat and a cane appears through the door with a bowl full of candy, she realizes how wrong she is. 

 Boy, is she wrong.

 Holy shit, he’s gorgeous. His skin looks ghostly white from the makeup on his face and he's wearing a brown curly mustache, but those vivid blue eyes are so very blue, even in the dark and under the hat he’s wearing. She’s afraid those eyes will set her on fire when he looks at her.

 “Trick or treat!” the children chorus. 

 Emma can’t take her eyes off the man as he excitedly hands out candy.

 “I love your costume, lassie,” he compliments a little girl who's wearing an Elsa costume.

 He has an accent? Holy hell.

 The little girl frowns, clearly not understanding what he meant by lassie. “I’m not a dog, I’m Elsa.”

 He chuckles, dropping a candy bar into her pumpkin bucket. “My apologies, Elsa. Please don’t blast me with ice.”

 “Thank you, mister,” she says cheerfully before scurrying down the steps to meet her parents at the end of the walkway. 

 “Trick or treat!”

 The man looks toward the small voice, seeing Henry approaching him. He grins big and wide, which makes him look much creepier than he already looks in his costume. Creepy, but sexy. “Well, hi there. Captain Hook, I presume?”

 Henry nods his head and opens his Halloween sack, using his plastic hook to hold one of the straps.

 “Very nice costume, lad. My favorite one so far.”

 “Thank you. I made it,” Emma boasts with a smile as she steps behind her son, placing the hat on his head. She’s not normally one to brag, but then again bragging doesn’t normally afford her the opportunity to talk to ridiculously handsome strangers.

 The man looks up, and when his eyes finally connect with hers, he completely steals her breath. She was wrong. His smoldering blue eyes don’t set her on fire, but they do make her melt.

 And his heavy stare makes her skin tingle.

 “You made this lovely costume?”

 She waves her hand nonchalantly. “It was easy. Just took a red, long-sleeved shirt, some ribbon and slapped some red felt and white feathers on a straw hat and voila.”

 “Very impressive, lass.” He glances at her shirt briefly before returning his eyes to hers. “Did you also make your costume?” he asks, his eyes dancing with mirth. He must have been referring to her red leather jacket and white t-shirt that reads, “This IS my Halloween costume.”

 Emma laughs. “No, I bought it on Amazon.” 

 “Wow, Mom, check this out! Full-size candy bars!” Henry shouts excitedly when the stranger deposits the candy bar into his sack.

 Emma tears her eyes from this man’s mesmerizing blue ones to see the full-size Snickers bar Henry’s holding out to show her. “Huh, people actually do give out full-size candy bars.” She looks up at the man. “I’m impressed. Let me guess, you also carved those pumpkins, too?” she asks, pointing to the pumpkins in his yard.

 He nods with a small smile. “I did. You’d be amazed by what I can do with these hands,” he says smugly.

 Emma wants to roll her eyes, but she can’t deny she very much wishes to find out exactly what he can do with those hands. Instead, she flashes a sarcastic smirk. “So who are you supposed to be, Jack the Ripper?” 

 He chuckles. “Not quite. I’m a gentleman from the Victorian Era. A devilishly handsome gentleman, may I add.”

 She cocks a brow, laughter bubbling in her throat. “If by a  devilishly handsome gentleman, you mean creepy.”

 He sets down the candy bowl and surprises her when he takes her hand in his and lowers his head, murmuring softly as he looks up at her. “The name’s Killian Jones. And it just so happens, I’m always a gentleman. Not just on Halloween.” His touch sears her skin, then he presses his lips to the back of her hand and it feels like electrical currents are surging through her. Her breath catches, and she’s worried he will notice. Judging by the smirk spreading across her skin, he definitely noticed.

 Emma turns her head, looking for her son, whom she spots in the yard playing games with the other kids, their parents supervising them. “I should get back to my son.”

 This man actually pouts as he releases her hand. And it’s freaking adorable. “I told you my name and yet you haven't told me yours?”

 She bites her bottom lip, contemplating whether she should or not. But then again, what’s the harm? It is a small town, so they’ll probably end up running into each other again at some point. “It’s Emma.”

 He grins, making her heart melt. “Nice to meet you, Emma.”

 “Likewise.” 

 He scratches behind his ear, which makes him look less creepy and even more adorable. “I’ve never seen you before. Are you new in town?”

 “I’m from Chicago.”

 “Well, love, welcome to Storybrooke.”

  Oh. Now he’s calling her love? Can this man get any sexier? Jesus Christ. “Thank you.” She gives him a shy smile and turns to head down the steps.

 “Wait. Before you go, I have a treat for you, too.” 

 She spins around, arching her brow. “Oh, that’s okay. Henry will share some of his candy with me.”

 He chuckles and shakes his head. “This treat is not for kids.”

 Emma gulps. “What kind of treat did you have in mind?” Something salty? Her mind definitely did not go into the gutter there. Okay, it totally did. 

 He heads inside, then returns not a moment later with a caramel apple. 

 “A caramel apple?” She almost sounds disappointed. But she’s definitely not.

 “Aye, but not just any caramel apple. It’s an adult caramel apple. So make sure you don’t share this with your lad.”

 She eyes it suspiciously. “It’s not laced with love potion, is it?”

 He chuckles and leans closer, whispering in her ear. “No. But it is laced with cannabis-infused butter.”

 Emma smirks as she takes the caramel apple. “Wow, you really go all out on Halloween, don’t you?”

 He shrugs. “You should come back around Christmas.”

 “Oh God, you’re not one of those people who goes completely crazy with the Christmas lights and the decorations and Santa and his reindeer on the roof, are you?”

 He shrugs again, donning a smirk. “Guess you’ll have to wait and find out.”

 “Is that an invitation?” Because she's definitely not thinking about inviting him to get high and engage in hot, sweaty sex with her. Not at all.  

 “Perhaps. Do you and your son enjoy hot cocoa and watching Christmas movies in front of a cozy fireplace?”

 She eyes the caramel apple and then glances up at him. “Does Santa enjoy adult cookies with his milk?”

 His grin widens, making her heartbeat skyrocket out of her chest. “Aye, then it’s a date.”

 Emma rolls her eyes, a smile tugging at her lips. “Not a date.” She doesn’t like the idea of waiting until Christmas to see him again, though.

 His face clouds with guilt. Sorry, love, I just didn't see a wedding ring on your finger so I assumed-”

 “I'm not married,” she clarifies, her cheeks flushing because of the fact that he was curious enough to check her hand for a ring. “Nor do I have a boyfriend. I'm single.” Very single. She's never been so glad to be single before.

 He sighs in relief, which gives her the courage to say what's on her mind and to thankfully change the subject.

 “You know, adult cookies aren’t just for Christmas...”

 He cocks his brow, and good Lord, she really needs him to stop doing that, because it’s doing things to her breathing and her heart. “No? What other special occasions are they for?”

 She shrugs. “Like a Saturday night, say next week when my parents are taking Henry for the weekend.”

 His eyes flash with something she can only describe as excitement. Or anticipation, maybe? “But still not a date, right?”

 She shakes her head. “Nope, just two adults enjoying their adult cookies.” 

 He laughs. “Okay, I’ll bring the apple cider.”

 “Sounds like a date,” she says accidentally when she had meant to say Sounds like a plan. But she doesn't even bother correcting herself as her cheeks warm with blush. She backs away and manages to rip her eyes from him to turn around and head down the steps. She finds Henry playing a game with the kids and takes his hand, telling him it’s getting late. He leaves with a groan but doesn't make a fuss. 

 As they leave the yard, Emma turns around, getting one last glimpse of the devilishly handsome Victorian gentleman. He winks and smiles at her, making her heart stutter, and she blushes and walks away as she leaves with her son.

  She had doubts when she moved to this small town to start over, but the warm feeling in her chest is telling her perhaps coming to Storybrooke wasn't a bad idea after all.

Tagging a few people who might be interested in reading:

@kmomof4 @teamhook @ilovemesomekillianjones @onceuponaprincessworld @artistic-writer @nikkiemms @snowbellewells @donteattheappleshook @itsfabianadocarmo​ @searchingwardrobes​ @melly326​

#cs ff #captain swan #halloween

[dreamwritesimagines]

Burn The Witch 12 - Bad Surprise [Bucky Barnes x Reader]

A.N: Thank you so much for your wonderful support and feedback my loves ! ❤ Here’s the next chapter, I hope you like it as well and please let me know what you think! ❤ Thank you! ❤❤❤

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Female Reader

Warnings: Enemies to lovers, fake dating, mentions of blood, sex, violence, death, manipulation, language, guns, knives.

Summary: Sometimes plans have to change.

Series Masterlist

Every job required something from people, and your job was no different.

Being a spy was not a conventional profession, everyone knew that. You were expected to be on the move all the time, be a good liar, be a good fighter, be whatever the job told you to.

And most important of all; never show fear, which you were usually fine with. You had learned long ago how to keep your calm in times of crisis. You had even managed to keep your calm facade when your last mission required you to play Russian Roulette with a target in order to keep your cover.

But this? This was something else.

Bucky cleared his throat to stifle a laugh as he looked down at you.

“Is it just me or are you using me as a human shield against a peacock right now?”

Your eyes snapped up at his for a moment before you turned your gaze to the peacock again, taking a subtle step to Bucky’s right to keep him between you and the animal.

Coming to the zoo was his idea, and you thought it could be a fun experience. You had never been to a zoo before, and it would count as one of the old times dates, so you were almost giggly by the time you got there.

Right until now.

“I think peacocks don’t have souls.”

“Alright.” Bucky sipped his coffee while you tried to ignore the fear bubbling at the pit of your stomach, eyeing the peacock that walked around the area behind the fences.

“I’m serious,” you insisted “What if it attacks me?”

“It’s not going to attack you Y/N.”

“It could,” you said, “It looks like it wants to attack me.”

The peacock fanned out its feathers all of a sudden and let out a squawk, making you jump out of your skin.

“Fuck!” the curse left your lips and Bucky’s eyebrows rose, an amused grin pulling at his lips.

“Sorry!” you said quickly, “Sorry, I…I don’t trust peacocks.”

“You got mugged in a dark alley and got shot, and a bird is where you draw the line?”

Correction, you were once held at gunpoint by the Italian mafia and peacocks were still where you drew the line.

“That’s not a bird.”

“….Peacocks are birds.”

“No, that’s the devil looking like a bird,” you said, “In-in bird shape. Bird shaped demon.”

“Okay, how about we see some other less threatening animal?”

“Let me check—oh my God Bucky they have sharks, I love sharks!” you said, waving the brochure in his face and he pulled his brows together.

“Sharks fall under the less threatening animal category?”

“Of course they do!” you said, looking at the brochure before looking around, “I think the aquarium is over there, let’s go.”

You grabbed his hand to entwine your fingers with his as you both started walking towards the huge blue structure.

“So I feel like I shouldn’t ask because I know you can’t exactly tell me the details,” you said, “But you’re not going on another mission soon, are you? This week?”

“I don’t think so,” he said, “Why?”

“I’m kind of planning something.”

He tilted his head, “What are you planning?”

“Not a club, relax.” you said, “Although I find it quite ironic that you’re this unstoppable brave superhero with super strength who gets intimidated by dancing.”

“I’m not intimidated…” he grumbled under his breath, making you giggle.

“Whatever you say,” you sang, and reached the entrance of the huge building and you pulled your hand out of his.

“Excuse me sir, is the aquarium still open?” you asked the security guard by the door and a small smirk appeared on his lips.

“Yes but it is closing in ten minutes sweetheart.”

Sweetheart?

Jesus Christ….

You smiled politely at him, batting your lashes.

“Oh—“ you took a look at the sign, “I just want to see the killer shark and we’ll be out. In five minutes. Please?”

He eyed you up and down but seemed to snap out of it when Bucky cleared his throat behind you as if warning him, making the guy gawk between you two.

Even you had to admit you seemed like a quite unusual couple. You were wearing a short white sundress with ruffled sleeves and sweetheart neckline with your hair loose while Bucky looked as if he was there to kill someone, a complete opposite of you with his dark jeans and black leather jacket as well as leather gloves.

You didn’t even have to turn your head to know that he was glaring at the guard before the guy shifted his weight, then stepped aside.

“Enjoy.”

“Thank you!” you said, grabbing Bucky’s hand as you led him inside. He followed you without any objections whatsoever, in complete silence as the sight of blue filled your vision along with many fish swimming behind the glass.

“You don’t even see it, do you?” he asked softly and you pulled your brows together.

“Hm?”

“Does anyone ever say no to you?”

You approached the label by the glass, “You do.”

“Do I?”

“All the time,” you nodded, still reading the label but your head shot up when you felt him tug you by the hand. A giggle escaped from your lips as he turned you around so that you could look up at him, then wrapped his arm around you to scoop you up, making you squeal.

“Bucky!”

“All the time?”

“Put me down!” you said, your laughter echoing in the empty aquarium halls and he tilted his head.

“Not until you explain yourself,” he teased you, “All the time?”

“Sometimes, sometimes!” you said quickly, “Very rare times I might add!”

“Mm hm, I thought so.”

“If you drop me, I swear to God—“ you started but was cut off when he pulled you into a kiss, making you wrap your arms around his neck. He took a step with you still in his embrace and you gasped as you felt your back hit the thick glass, but every single protest you could think of seemed to disappear from your mind as you lost yourself in the kiss. You raked your fingernails over the nape of his neck, making his grip around you tighter-

Then someone coughed.

Bucky pulled back instantly and you turned your head to see another rather annoyed technician leaning on her hip, watching you with her brows raised.

“Aquarium is about to close,” she said, pointing at you, “Take it elsewhere.”

Bucky put you down and you tried to fix the skirt of your dress, trying to look presentable.

“Sorry!” you said as Bucky mumbled an apology beside you as well, and the technician shook her head and walked away, talking about how she wasn’t getting paid enough for this. You covered your face and let out a whine but Bucky chuckled, causing you to lower your hands to stare up at him.

“Why is this entertaining for you?” you exclaimed and he held your wrist, gently steering you to the exit.

“Come on.”

“We can never come here again, ever.” you insisted as you followed him outside. It didn’t escape your notice that he bumped his shoulder into the security guard’s quite hard, almost knocking him over on your way out and your jaw dropped.

“That was mean!”

“Nah, he had it coming. Are you hungry?”

“But you could get in trouble. Besides, he was a nice guy—“

“Uh huh, a nice guy who was ogling you.”

You pulled your brows together, pretending to be confused, “Oh I’m sure you misunderstood.”

He tilted his head and pulled you closer to wrap his arm around your waist, then brushed his lips against yours, making you sigh.

“Bucky, it was mean and you can’t just kiss me to distract me—”

“I can try,” he murmured to your lips before kissing you again and you looked up at him when he pulled back with a grin.

“Fine,” you admitted, still pouting. “I’m hungry. Starving actually, let’s eat something.”

                                                    ***

You were finding it harder and harder to convince yourself it was time to go home after every date with Bucky.

Scratch that, you were finding it harder and harder not to invite him upstairs.

But of course, you would have to report it back to the General and discuss the further strategies with him and for some reason, it felt more of a betrayal than this whole thing.

Surprisingly enough, it was something you wanted and not something you would will yourself to do because of the mission. There was no denying it, he was an attractive guy and you really liked spending time with him and you kept having dreams about him and whenever you were with him you had this lightness in your mind, as if you were a different person.

A better person, maybe.

You shook your head at your thoughts and left your apartment to knock on Keith’s door.

“It’s me, open up.”

You heard footsteps before he opened the door and a boyish smile pulled at his lips at the sight of milkshakes in your hand.

“Jesus, finally!”

“I made it at home, can’t promise it’s good,” you said as you walked past him into his apartment and stepped into the living room, “What are you watching?”

“James Bond,” he grinned at you, “Hey, have you ever tried milkshake with gin?”

“No?”

“Me neither, let’s try it.” He said, taking the big glasses from you to pour gin into them. You sat on the couch and took a look at the screen.

“How many times have you watched this again?”

“Like a hundred,” he handed you your glass and you took a sip.

“Not bad,” you commented, putting your feet up on the coffee table. He sat beside you, keeping his eyes on the screen.

“What did you do today?”

“Had a date.”

“With Barnes?”

“Yeah. At the zoo.”

“He took you to the zoo?” he asked and you nodded.

“Yeah.”

“And?”

“And peacocks are fucking scary,” you muttered, “And hey, we learned that Bucky is the jealous type.”

“The guy was dating people back at 40s, I could tell you that much myself.” He snorted, “Chloe says you went on a mission with Julian?”

You slipped a little on the couch, “He’s an asshole.”

“I know. Is he really that bad in bed?”

You shrugged your shoulders, “Nah as much as I hate to admit, he’s pretty good. Unfortunately.”

“So top or bottom?”

“He goes either way to be honest, that comment was more about me.”

“About you?”

“Yeah, I like to be on top.”

“Suddenly everything about you makes sense,” he murmured and you took another sip of your milkshake.  

“Don’t try that with Barnes though, the guy is from 1940s. He’s probably used to missionary only, you don’t want to give him a heart attack,” he wiggled his brows, making you scoff.

“Shut up.”

“Chloe is right, maybe you should go full on vintage on that when the time comes.”

You turned to look at him.

“Speaking of Chloe,” you said, “Anything you would like to tell me?”

Keith’s grin faded slightly and he shifted his weight, “Like what?”

“Bringing her coffee, taking her out to the field…” you trailed off, “What gives, man? I thought we had a deal.”

“We never had a deal,” he defended himself, “You slammed me back during training years ago at the academy and told me not to even think about it when you saw me looking at her.”

“No,” you shook your head, “Five years ago, in Ireland. That undercover job, the one that almost got you killed? We made a deal.”

He swallowed thickly, looking down at the milkshake before taking a sip. “Y/N…”

“Keith, you can’t,” you insisted, “She deserves a normal life, a normal family and kids and a dog and stuff.”

“I know,” he ran a hand over his face, “I know.”

“Then?”

“I don’t know.”

“You’re a spy,” you said, “You said it yourself, spies die like flies.”

“Not all of them,” he said, “General is still alive. He has a family.”

“Yeah, one in a hundred,” you said, “Face it. That’s a very low possibility for us.”

“You don’t think you’ll get to grow old and have a family and all that?”

You pulled your brows together.

“No,” you said, “Of course not. I’m probably going to die in one of these missions.”

“You don’t believe that.”

“Keith, I can’t have any of those,” you said, “I can’t. I…it’s impossible.”

“Don’t you want to?”

“It doesn’t matter what I want,” you muttered, “I made my choice ages ago.”

“Y/N,” he sat up straighter, “Do you want to?”

With a very bad timing, your imagination went overdrive and a strange scene flashed before your eyes. You laughing in Bucky’s arms, watching two kids playing in the garden-

You shook your head, trying to shake off the thoughts.

“I could never have that,” you stated simply, “You might love Chloe and you might also be lucky enough to have her love you but…it’s not the same with me.”

“I’d say Barnes loves you.”

A bitter smile pulled at your lips and you bit inside your cheek, taking another sip of your milkshake.

“He loves someone who doesn’t exist,” you managed to croak out, “He loves my cover. He could never love me.”

                                                           ***

Spending the night at Keith’s and drowning your sorrows in gin and milkshake meant that you would have a killer hangover the next day. Unlike Keith, you didn’t have the luxury to sleep until the noon, seeing that you had a cover job to keep so for the whole day until noon, you walked around like a zombie.

Coffee helped though. Just a little.

Thankfully it was a slow day at the shop. After serving a couple of people, you had nothing to do other than seriously considering sticking your head in the freezer to get rid of the hangover.

“Long night?” Tara asked as she walked past you to put the straws into the cup and you nodded, groaning.

“Remind me not to drink, ever.”

“I make that promise to myself every Monday, does not seem to work.”

You chuckled, “Have you ever tried to mix gin into milkshakes?”

“No?”

“Don’t,” you shook your head as you helped her to move an empty milkshake container into the kitchen. “It’s a terrible idea and I’m experiencing the consequences of that mistake right now.”

“That sounds like a fun night though.”

“Fun night, terrible morning,” you let out a laugh as you walked out of the kitchen but as soon as you did, your eyes caught the sight of the man in the shop. Your smile was wiped off your face as the familiar anger filled your system.

Jesus Christ, this day sucks.

“What the fuck are you doing here?” you asked and Julian had the audacity to shoot you a grin.

“Whoa cute outfit,” he said, eyeing you up and down, “Holy shit I didn’t even know I was into this whole thing, I’m having an epiphany.”

You looked over your shoulder to see if Tara was still in the kitchen, then turned to Julian.

“What are you doing here?”

“I was craving milkshakes,” he stated, “Hey, would you recommend Lavender Macaron?”

“Get the fuck out of here.”

“I think I’m gonna go with Lavender Macaron, makes me think of France,” he said, “Fun times.”

“Fun for you maybe.”

He shot you a look, “Come on Y/N, we didn’t leave the honeymoon suite for two days. That was the greatest-“ he lowered his voice, “Mission I’ve ever had.”

“You’re putting this entire operation in—“ you started but stopped talking as soon as Tara walked out of the kitchen. Julian raised his brows for a moment before smiling at her and you went under the counter to grab his arm.

“Y/N, is everything okay?”

“Just peachy,” you said as you dragged him out of the shop, and he heaved a sigh, following you.

“No I’m serious…” he said with a chuckle as soon as you both stepped outside, then motioned at the uniform, “This is something else.”

“Why are you here?”

“I heard that it was good, I did not think it was this good.”

“I’m seriously two seconds away from punching you.”

“How come you never dressed up like this for me when we were dating?”

“What the fuck are you doing here?” you insisted and he shrugged his shoulders.

“I was around.”

“And I’m supposed to believe that?”

“Believe whatever you want,” he said, “Your shop has good rating, although I’m beginning to believe it has less to do with milkshakes and more about the waitresses.”

“Julian I swear to God—“ you started but you were cut off when someone cleared his throat, making both you and Julian turn your heads. Your stomach dropped as soon as you saw Bucky watching you two with a frown and you withdrew your hand from Julian’s arm.

“Bucky,” you breathed out, “Um-hi.”

“Hi,” he said without taking his eyes off Julian, and you could almost see the wheels turning in his head.

He was trying to decide whether he was a threat to you.

“I didn’t…I didn’t know you were coming.”

“I figured I could drop by,” he said, crossing his arms, “What’s going on?”

Fuck.

Fuck, you had no idea how to turn this around. Thankfully neither of you had said anything about the mission, so it was more than likely that Bucky just knew you knew each other, but other than that, your cover wasn’t blown.

“Nothing! Nothing at all, he’s just—“ you stammered, trying to come up with an explanation, “He’s um—“  

“Oh come on Y/N, don’t be one of those secretive people,” Julian said, “You hate secrets. You’re Bucky, right? I heard about you.”

Bucky just raised his brows, his glare on him unwavering but even if it was quite chilling, Julian was a trained assassin just like you were, so he was used to it. Instead he curled his lips, looking between you before offering him his hand.

“I’m Julian,” he introduced himself, shooting you a grin as if you two shared an inside joke “The evil ex-boyfriend who’s gonna take her from you.”

Chapter 13

#bucky barnes #bucky barnes x reader #tfatws #bucky barnes imagine #marvel #bucky barnes x you #the falcon and the winter soldier