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omg-im-such-a-masochist · 3 years

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🛁 🔥🧼SPA DAY FROM HELL 🧼🔥🛁

Prompt: Y/N has never been happier to finally have her spa day time at home, but what it should be a relaxing day, becomes quite the opposite when a beautiful Irish man decides to join her.

Word count: Long-ish

Pairing: Finn Bálor x Reader

Warnings: +18, smut(implied), fluff, frustrated spa day, clingy Finn.

Notes: This is dedicated to my sincere love for cosmetics and Fergal Devitt! 😂 I don’t know why, but Finn has always gave me the feeling of being extra loving, extra caring, extra sweet, even a little needy and clingy (which I’m a sucker for guys who can be extremely affectionate) and he just seems like the type, that’s why most of my fluff ideas for stories always end up having him as part of the plot, he exudes that energy of pure love and affection, I don’t know, there you have it I guess.. Y’all know the drill loves,sorry for misspellings,english isn’t my first language (bla bla bla),check out my other stories if you’d like to(it would make your girl here very happy 😊) and if you’re comfortable with it,please let me know what you think? Some feedback is always welcomed and appreciated ❤️You can check out my other stories typing ‘masochist writes’ on the search bar on my page and my newest story as a fixed post.Okay,now let’s get to the fun part,shall we? Hope you’ll enjoy 😉

Earlier that morning

I finished gathering all of my essential materials for my weekly spa day at home.

This was a sacred weekly routine I’ve had for as long as I can remember, one day of the week where I would shut myself off the world, without a single care for nothing except my own self! In crazy weeks, such as the one I just had, this was the day I eagerly waited for. My little piece of heaven on earth, where nothing could go wrong...

I was beginning to take my clothes off when a loud thump coming from downstairs, in the living room, startled me to death.

*Oh God, please don’t let it be an intruder* I silently prayed as I grabbed a metal baseball bat from the bathroom (Yes, I have one metal baseball bat on each room of this house ok? I know it sounds slightly paranoid, but I’ve had a rough childhood so don’t judge me!)

I made my way downstairs in my underwear and armed with my faithful baseball bat. I already placed it to attack mode, when I saw a manly figure kneeled down, messing around with a large bag, with his back facing the stairs.

*A burglar! Oh, you’ve messed with the wrong house motherfucker!*

As I was ready to give my knockout attack to the back of his head, the man said

“Argh! Every damn time this happens ta me! I need ta fix this cursed zipper”

*I know that voice..*

“Fergal Devitt! Have you lost your mind?!”

Finn’s whole body jumped from fright and he turned to face me.

“Jesus Christ, Y/N! Ya almost gave me a heart attack!”

“No, I almost knocked your ass down, Devitt! Don’t you know better than showing up like a creep on my house like that?Don’t you know all about my ‘attack mode’ whenever I hear noises around the house?Fuck, I thought you were a burglar or something, I almost killed you!” I said, with my heart still beating at a ferocious pace from both the fright and almost hurting him.

“And did ya planned on killing tha burglar with tha bat or from a severe hard on?” He pointed with his chin towards my black and red lace lingerie.

“Ha ha, very funny Fergal. I’m serious! I could’ve hurt you really bad you know?”

“Oh trust me, ya are” He stood up and adjusted himself on his black jeans.

“Finn, I’m not joking babe” I said placing the baseball bat down on the couch.

“Me neither! Those are ta kill any man” He said as he approached me.

He wrapped his arms around my waist, tightly securing me on his embrace while he kissed me deeply. Once we broke the kiss, he looked at me and said

“I’m sorry ta scare ya like that, I just wanted ta surprise ya”

“It’s ok baby, I loved the surprise, but please don’t do that anymore! It scares me to think what could’ve happened if I didn’t notice it was you.” I pecked his lips “Just give me a heads up next time ok?”

“Ok love. Now what do ya say about we go upstairs and have a little adult fun time, huh?”

“Uhmmm, I don’t know about that..” I teased

“I’ll make ya change yer mind love” He lightly chuckled as he kissed down my neck

Later in the afternoon

I begin to lay out my products on the bathroom sink, carefully choosing where to begin. When Finn bursted through the bathroom door.

“What yer doing love?” While he bites on an red apple.

“Jesus Finn, don’t you know how to knock?”

“What? There’s no need fer me ta knock”

“Yes there is!” I said shocked “What if I was doing something private?”

“Private?” He chuckled “Love, I’ve seen it all before. Yer gorgeous. It’s not like ya need ta hide from me” He sincerely smiled

I just took a deep breath as a response

“Ya didn’t answer me. What yer doing?” He pointed to my products beautifully placed on the sink, while he hungrily chewed on his apple.

“I’m setting things up for my spa day”

“Spa day?”

“Yes, I always take one day of the week to have some quality me time in which I happily do my weekly spa routine” I smiled at him proudly

“So what exactly do ya do on this spa day?”

“Well it changes depending on the week I’ve had. Sometimes I do more, sometimes I do less, but today I’ll be deep exfoliating my body and face, put a detoxifying mask on my hair and face followed by a nourishing mask for my face, applying a moisturizing mask on my hair and a deep moisturizing lotion on my body. I also might do my nails, but I’m not sure yet”

When I didn’t get a response I looked up to Finn who’ve had mixture between shock and amusement on his face.

“What?” I asked

“Wow love,that’s...a lot! No wonder yer skin’s so fucking soft” He said in awe

“Well..I like doing that..is sort of a way to relax I guess” I was blushing in sort of an embarrassed way

“I don’t mean it like it’s a bad thing ya know?! How do ya know so much about those things?”

“I don’t know that much about it, I just like reading about it and testing products...Some people see it as a futile thing but, I like it you know?” I said slightly self conscious about the amount of time people judged me as a complete hollow, materialistic and futile person, just for my sincere love for cosmetics.

Finn stood up from the tub, where he was seated, made his way to me and placed his hands on my hips.

“Well, I don’t think it’s futile. I think that ya shouldn’t be embarrassed about tha things ya like, ya should be proud of it, love! Besides” He started to kiss down my neck “I love tha fact that I get ta enjoy tha end results” He roamed his hands upon my bare skin

“Finny...if you keep doing that, I’m not gonna be able to do anything” I sighed

“But I can’t help it! Yer skin is so soft, ya smell so good and I’ve missed ya so much” He pressed his hardening bulge against my ass “Tha only thing I had ta keep me company at night was yer t-shirt...It helped, but it’s not tha same...” He pressed me harder against him “I need ta give it back ta ya, since I’ve made such good use of it, it doesn’t even smells like ya anymore baby” He bites my ear lightly

“Finn....please babe” I tried to fight back the growing need of him

“C’mon love, just give me a few minutes huh?! I just need some loving” He started to dry hump his hard bulge against my ass

“Fuck” I moan “Fine, just a few minutes”

In the late afternoon

“Finally” I sighed softly to myself. As I was opening the package of my face mask I hear some terrible singing coming from the room next door. It sounds like a fucking dying animal..

“Oh God, please tell me this is a joke” I made my way to the room next door and entered, just to find Finn only on his briefs, with headphones on, singing terribly to the very loud music playing, doing some laundry.

“Finn?” I called, a minute passed with no response

“FINN?” Still silent, as he bounces his hips (or at least tries to) to the rhythm of the music. When I realize that my yelling is useless, I made my way towards him and took one headphone out.

“Fergal?”

“Hey love” he pecks my lips “What yer up to?”

“I’m trying to relax” I said slightly annoyed

“Oh, I can help ya with that” he smirked as he reached for my tank top. I slapped his hand away, before saying

“I don’t mean it like that, I mean I’m trying to do my spa day, and your awful deadly singing is not helping at all. I love you, but you’re so fucking tone deaf! It’s driving me crazy!”

He chuckled and said as he approached me

“I have another way ta make ya relax love..”

“Fergal! Don’t you think, we’ve fucked enough already? We’ve done it twice and you’ve only been in this house for six hours!” I backed away from him

“I can’t never get enough of ya lass. I don’t think we’ve fucked enough already, I want ta fuck ya all tha time.” He reaches his arms to me

“Fergal, don’t you dare”

“Come here Y/N, let me tell ya a secret” he smiles deviously

The fucker knew what effect he has on me every time he gets this raw and possessive.

“Finn, I’m serious”

“Don’t be like that Y/N, I just want ta tell ya something, come here”

“You can said it out loud, I’m listening”

“I told ya it’s a secret, nobody can hear it”

“It’s just us here Fergal”

“Still..” He ran towards me, I was caught off guard so I didn’t even had time to process his surprise attack until I was laying down on the floor and Finn on top of me, pining me down.

“Ferg, what are you doing? Let me go”

“Hmmmm, I’m not really in tha mood ta let ya go” His eyes sparkling with mischief

“Finn, please I got stuff to do” I tugged my wrists in an attempt to free myself from his grip

“You were tha one who came in here lass”

“Yes, because I thought there was a dying animal on this room, Jesus, you almost got me deaf with your rotten singing”

He only chuckled as he buried his face on my neck

“In a few minutes I bet ya there’s gonna be another type of screaming in this room”....

In the late evening

I had sadly gave up my spa day and was only filling up the tub so I could take a bath, it was the only thing I could do since I was exhausted thanks to Finn.

The bath salts smelled incredible so I strip off my remaining clothes (which consisted in basically my tank top and panties)

And hopped on the bathtub, I sighed in content, feeling my muscles start to loosen up and the relaxation finally hitting me. But that soon went down the drain when the bathroom door opened

“Hmmm smells nice in here”

I opened my eyes to see Finn at the foot of the bathtub *Please tell me I slept in the tub and drowned and this is my version of hell*

“So selfish Y/N” he clicked his tongue

“What?”

“Ya didn’t even invited me?”

I had already accepted the fact that I wasn’t gonna have a time for myself as long as Finn is home so I just said

“Do you wanna come in?”

He just smiled like a little boy and took off his boxers. I leaned forward to give some space for him to hop on behind me, but he said

“I want ta be in tha front”

It was a rare occasion for Finn to want to be in front of me, but whenever he was far away for a long time he liked to be the little spoon, it was cute to see a man as strong as Finn wanting to be the one who’s comforted. I actually eager those moments when we would switch places and I was the one able to take care of him.

He sat on the tub in front of me, resting his back on my breasts, his head on my shoulder, pulled my legs on top of his so that his arms could rest on my thighs. One of my arms slides on top of his shoulder to cross his chest while my other arm was resting on the side of the tub stroking his short hair. As he hummed in appreciation.

“I like this love”

“Yeah, me too” I kissed his cheek lightly

After a few minutes of a comfortable silence he says

“Are ya mad at me?”

“Why would I be mad at you?”

“Because I ruined yer spa day?” He looked at me with guilty eyes

“Finny, you didn’t ruined baby, you just...happily convinced me of doing other activities instead” I chuckled softly

“I’m sorry love, is just that, I can’t help it ya know? I love ya so much and I missed ya so much that I just wanted ya all ta myself today”

“Oh Finny, that’s so sweet baby. You can have me whenever you want sunshine. I’m not complaining”

“So does that mean that I can have ya all fer myself tomorrow?” He stared at me pleading with those beautiful ocean blue eyes

“Of course baby, you can have me all day if you want, at least for as long as you’re home” I smiled

“Really? Everyday, all day long, without ya having ta work?”

“Yeah, I promise you”

“Good” He sighs in content

“How long are you staying home?”

“Two weeks love”

My eyes widened in shock “Two weeks?”

“Yeah, I managed ta get a few extra days off” He smirked and pecks my lips

I still looked at him in disbelief, I was ready for four days or something, now two weeks?

“Good thing ya work fer yourself, right love?” He hummed satisfied “Oh can ya wash my hair please? I love when ya do that”

I just nodded in agreement

He happily smiles “Thank you baby. I love ya” As he rested his head on my shoulder again and closed his eyes

How the hell was I supposed to fuck this Irish man four times a day for two weeks straight? Maybe I should Google that, right?...

#fergal devitt #finn balor one shot #finn balor x reader #finn balor fanfiction #finn balor #finn balor imagine #finn balor smut #wwe smut #wwe fanfiction #wwe one shot #wwe imagine #wrestling imagine #masochist writes

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doitwritenow · 4 years

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IronStrange Starter Kit - Master Fic Rec List for all Y’all Because You’ve been Asking and I’ve been Avoiding

Hi! All you anons and askers, I made a list!!! Hopefully some of these are what you’ve been after. :D

(Please reblog this, lol, I spent too much time on it...)

General rules: These are complete unless indicated otherwise, and end happily unless indicated otherwise. There’s a variety of ratings, as I have no qualms against smut, but I don’t usually read it outside of a larger plot. So I don’t think there’ll be many explicit stories on here. Word counts vary; I indicate general length but don’t go into specifics. What else, uh... Bold stuff is the headers and general subjects. I link the titles. Block quotes are author summaries. Enjoy!!

Okay so first off, there are a couple of Fandom Staples who just have leagues worth of good short stories, and if you haven’t read them, then definitely treat yourself to the array:

A Thousand Futures of Me and You - VisionaryGalaxy (Vishanti, what a legend, ily so much). This is a series of unconnected one-shots, each their own and covering a variety of tropes and moments and themes and AUs. They’re so fun (and/or painful and/or thought-provoking and/or tense and/or sexy)! In-character and amazing, consistantly.

Prompt Collection - amethyst-noir (Arbonne). (Also a legendary human). This is exactly what it sounds like: a series of prompt fills in all sorts of tones. You’ll almost certainly find something here that feels like it was just made for you!

Alright, onto the individual stories and series!

Long fics/series:

The of overqualified hands and pi figures series - lantia4ever. (This was my first Ironstrange story, and it is no less magical now.)

A series of one-shots, all set in the same alternate verse in which Tony and Stephen first meet following the events of the first Avengers and then continue to meet after that throughout the canon up until Infinity War and eventually beyond it. Becoming friends - and more along the way.

Time After Time - fancylances. (I love love LOVE this one. Highly recommended.)

Tony Stark is unstuck in time. Stephen Strange might just be the only person in the universe qualified enough to help.

Citizen Erased - Imagined. (This author. Just... such a wonderful, talented, stunning person who makes wonderful, talented, stunning works. This story is masterful.)

What do you do when no one in the world ever manages to remember you?

Anyone who sees Tony Stark promptly forgets he ever existed after mere seconds. When everyone he has ever cared about has lost their memories of him, he goes to Stephen Strange, possibly the only one who can help him lift the curse. But a terrifying danger is coming, and saving the world isn’t an easy job to do when no one can remember who you are.

if only the gods had mercy on us and it’s sequel a soul too deep - orphan_account. (Vishanti, this series... It’s so beautiful and emotional and heart-breaking and heart-warming. And it has so few views for so many words! One of my absolute favorites, VERY highly recommended.)

Tony Stark loved Stephen Strange. He loved him more than anyone could ever imagine. But then a terrorist group attacked the convoy. Then there was a car accident. In the middle of it all, there is tired, battered love. (And, maybe, a little bit of genius)

From the Top - lucifersfavoritechild. (Everyone reads this fic. Written by the blogger Monarch Of The Ironstrange Ship, it’s an MCU rewrite around the relationship. Very fun.)

“Stephen, if you’re . . . there somewhere . . . when I drift off, I’ll be with you again. I can’t wait.”

|| Personally, I think the MCU would be much better as a love story between Stephen Strange and Tony Stark. Don't you?

Starting from Iron Man, and going all the way to Endgame, with all the appropriate stops in between. Let's take it from the top.

UNFINISHED: Skin Deep - Mystical_Magician. (Super cool premise, and super interesting to read! The dynamic here is very fun.)

A battle that should have finally killed Stephen instead launches him into a parallel universe. Exhausted from centuries as Sorcerer Supreme, he chooses instead to explore this new world in any animal form except human. Having hoped for peace at last, he can't stand to be looked up to, to be responsible for others, to have the world on his shoulders.

If he'd hoped to avoid excitement, however, he really should have stayed away when he noticed an enormous explosion and a falling metal suit of armor as he passed through Afghanistan.

UNFINISHED: The End of Infinity - FriendlyNeighborhoodFangirls. (Self rec. Very long, very slow-burn. Canon-compliant Endgame fix-it. I’m trying so hard, lol.)

In 2023, the battle for the universe has been won. At a cost no one can forget, the fight is over—for all but one. Stephen Strange has an idea. An impossible idea spanning dimensions and timelines, life and death, and the lines of good and evil. But he's played impossible odds before—perhaps he never stopped.

All that Loki wanted was to fight, one last time, for the fate of his universe. So when he finds himself fighting for another, crashing into the past, he has a few intended words for the wizard that forced him there. But not before he finds a boy. Or, more accurately, before the boy finds him.

Peter Parker had been waiting for the next mission. He just doesn't expect it to come from the future, armed with a ridiculous story demanding a ridiculous quest. And he doesn't expect not to be able to tell Mr. Stark.

Tony Stark is trying to rebuild from the Civil War, knowing that someday, something will come that he needs to be ready for. And he doesn't know it yet, but two universes are trying to rebuild around him, and that something is already here.

Seven Stones. Five dead. Two universes. And one impossible quest to tie it all back together.

UNFINISHED: Sunrise in Exile - Ragdoll (Keshka). (Another fandom favorite! And for good reason. This is really really good!)

Tony does the math and realizes their best chance to save the universe is by... not confronting Thanos on his own turf.

So he steals a wizard and a spider and a space ship. And he runs.

(Three humans and an A.I in space, the alien friendships they make along the way, and discovering how science and magic might coexist in a universe where they can be one and the same.)

Shorter plotty ones:

Out of Suffering - Mystical_Magician. (So this author??? THIS AUTHOR??? Very very good, much yes, very good.)

Stephen Strange does not like people, but 14,000,605 lifetimes of fighting and dying alongside this small group have worn down his walls. He likes them, gods help him. He might even consider them friends. It’s really for the best that they all go their separate ways once Thanos has been defeated. In their eyes, he’s barely even an acquaintance.

Now if only Tony and Peter would stop surprising him.

moros - spookykingdomstarlight. (Almost got a spot in the angst section. Very good).

There were fourteen million universes Stephen had birthed into existence and let die and, in far more than he cared to count, the visitor standing before him had become something… dear.

Shaking is Caring - mariadperiad20. (This is just STUNNING. Highly loved.)

5 times Stephen's hands would shake, +1 time they didn't.

It's Kinda Chalky - DestielsDestiny. (This one’s pretty short, but definitely worth it.)

You can live an entire lifetime by looking into someone’s eyes. His sister used to say that all the time. Stephen never gave it much thought back then. These days, he can think of little else.

Something Magic - Imagined. (Beautiful!)

There is only ever one rule that matters:

do not fall in love with the enemy.

An Idiotic Theory - FriendlyNeighborhoodFangirls. (Self rec! I tried to be funny.)

His wizard has been cursed, again, and Tony's already used up his luck for the day.

(Stephen says it's not a curse. He says Tony's whole daily-allotted karma-based luck theory has minimal merit, citing the fact that Tony had come up with it while he was drunk.)

Tony really should have saved his miracle.

Love Through Time - babywarg (morphaileffect). (I love this one. It sticks with you.)

Tony discovers an old drawing of, and finally remembers, his invisible friend Stephen from when he was a child.

Alternates - doobler. (Super cool!)

After being punked by a lowbrow magician, Stephen finds himself falling through doors to otherwordly dimensions. How will he ever get home?

132 - 28ghosts. (Soulmate AU! Very fun, incorporates Stephen’s time-loop with Dormammu.)

Ninety-nine point eight percent of humans have a soulmate mark that tells them the age their soulmate will be when they meet them. Tony Stark has a mark. It's just that his is...different than most people's.

(Or: six people who aren't Tony Stark's soulmate, and one who is.)

and when the world falls (I will fall with it) - HeavenChild. (Another multichap soulmate AU. Absolutely lovely.)

Tony will give anything to those he loves.

People will take everything he gives before leaving him in shambles.

Rhodhey, Pepper and Vision have had enough.

Or the five times Tony had his heart broken and the one time he didn't.

i saw the end of the world - JumpToConclusions. (Why has no one read this fic??? It’s so good!!! Stephen knows the future since he saw it on Titan, and things grow more complex from there.)

Tony and Strange are trying to make this work, this being remaking The Avengers. ...And maybe they'll stumble into something else along the way.

Tiresome heart, forever living and dying - Mystical_Magician. (R e a d t h i s p l e a s e. The mythology is so cool and the symbolism is so beautiful and the prose is so satisfying. One of my absolute faves.)

As a fledgling crane, Stephen was too curious for his own good, and it was this curiosity that led to Eugene Strange finding and stealing away his feather robe. Trapped in human form, cruelly forged into the perfect son, not even his father's death freed him when his robe was so well hidden. He only managed to break his father's mold after breaking completely in the aftermath of his accident, and slowly gluing those broken pieces back together at Kamar-Taj, but not even magic could find what had been hidden. Enter Tony, after the defeat of Thanos.

Fluffy ones:

From The Outside - Live. (Hilarious.)

Being a sentient life-form surrounded by humanity can be hard. Especially when said humans just can't admit their feelings for each other.

Sleeping Iron Man - Golden_Asp. (Another fun one. Perfect balance of ridiculousness with a touch of angst to make it interesting.)

Stephen Strange stared at the Avengers on his doorstep, Tony Stark flung over Steve Rogers' shoulder like a sack of potatoes. "He touched something, didn't he?" "Yuup." or The one where Tony touches Sleeping Beauty's spindle, is put into an enchanted sleep, and everyone, even Rocket Raccoon, take their turn kissing him. But Tony only has one prince charming.

Doctor Ob(li)vious - lantia4ever. (One of my very favorites. So cute.)

Stephen starts getting some weird looks from the Avengers, spanning across disturbed, confused and even scared all the way to curious. He dismisses it at first until weird turns into knowing.

And knowing turns into realizing...even if the scheming teenagers had to all but paint it on the walls for him to do so. Oh wait...

Applied Combinatorics in Two-Player Games - 28ghosts. (Short and fun and full of snark.)

After a battle, Tony Stark and Stephen Strange argue about games.

“Chess is not a solved problem.”

“Has been since ��97, Kasparov versus Deep Blue. Kasparov, 1; Deep Blue, 2; three draws.”

“Chess is a game, not a problem.”

The Courtship of Peter Parker's Father (Figures) - flyingonfeatherlesswings. (Peter plays matchmaker! Adorable.)

Peter couldn't stand to sit by while Tony and Stephen danced around each other any longer. Something had to be done.

Speaking Eyes - Vrishchika. (Not Steve Friendly. Tony is amazing in this. And Stephen is so fantastically dramatic.)

Tony has always had expressive eyes.

The Signs of Sleep Deprivation - FriendlyNeighborhoodFangirls. (Another self-rec. <3)

"Tony said to put the potato in the dishwasher, so that's what I did."

Sometimes, Avengers just show up to say hi. Sometimes, they all show up at once, and Tony makes an party out of it. Sometimes, he invites the snarky, oblivious, somewhat insecure wizard because, and Peter quotes: "everyone else is coming".

Sometimes, something needs to be done.

Show Me Your Scars (And I'll Show You Mine) - Imagined. (Adorable. Lovely. Imagined does it again.)

The worst part is that Stephen keeps tucking his hands away, just as Tony wants to hold them. He keeps hiding them, surreptitiously, no matter what they’re doing. It’s only when Tony kisses Stephen, or hugs him, that he feels the hands settle on his back, uncertain, ready to pull back within seconds.

It only makes him want to cuddle up to Stephen even more, but he backs away, not sure if it’d be welcome.

Promise? Promise. - sharonscarters. (AU, kidfic, absolutely adorable.)

A four year old Tony Stark runs away from home and finds his Guardian Angel.

What The Doctor Ordered - wakandan_wardog. (Post CW. Kind of not Rogues friendly? So fun, makes me smile. I re-read this one a lot.)

The Rogue Avengers are called back to New York because the heavy hitters are going to be needed against Thanos. Of course, there are some truths that Steve Rogers will need to accept sooner rather than later. Tony Stark has moved on and Stephen Strange will not suffer fools lightly.

Hurt/Comforty ones:

Among The Chaos of The Stars (You're My Safe Harbour) - ShootMeDead. (Oh my vishanti. OH MY VISHANTI. So so so so SO good.)

Stephen has always been able to hear the stars. Tony is the only one who can silence them.

each night like a white noise frequency - Phierie. (I ADORE THIS FIC. OKAY. I LOVE IT. READ IT.)

Stephen is no stranger to making hard choices. He doesn’t regret his actions on Titan, but months later they weigh on his mind heavier than ever; the cracks begin to show.

Just An Accident - CucumbersInGold. (I really like fics with Stephen’s hands and the difficulties thereabout. Idk, just one of my favorite things. This is beautiful).

Stephen's hands act up.

Learning, Unlearning - Caaaaaaas. (More character study than anything else. Really good.)

Whatever Stephen wanted with life, life just didn’t seem to know what to do with him.

In which Stephen learns and unlearns some very important lessons.

your eyes have their silence - doctortwelfth. (Oh look it’s another scars fic. I told you I liked them.)

Tony is gentle with Stephen’s hands even when Stephen forgets to be.

Burning Lines Into The Snow - petroltogo. (Not very Steve friendly. Short and sweet.)

Post CW: It's not just the team that's so broken they are barely able to comprehend how many parts they're missing now, how many have been ripped and twisted and torn. It's Tony as well, right down to the core, the damage so far-reaching even he doesn't know how to fix it.

And then there's Strange, who has his own way of covering the cracks.

Old Bones - CJtheWeeb. (Owch. Dumb geniuses trying to be invulnerable.)

Sometimes Stephen Strange has great days, where he was nearly pain free and his hands still enough to where he could pick up a cup of water and barely spill a drop.

Today was not one of those days.

something taken, something new - meowrails. (So in-character. The premise was a little off to me, but I’m so glad I decided to read this one. I really really like this fic.)

The ChronicConnection implement and app allows a person that lives with chronic or illness-induced pain to transfer their burden temporarily to a willing loved one.

Tony and Stephen sign up as beta testers.

Angsty ones (happy ending unless otherwise mentioned):

day one - days4daisy. (THIS IS SO GOOD OKAY IF YOU READ NOTHING ELSE ON THIS LIST READ THIS).

Three days in Stark Tower. Stephen must be in bad shape if he just agreed to this.

His Merlin - babywarg (morphaileffect). (This author keeps showing up on this list because they are A LEGEND. A LEGEND I TELL YOU.)

As a child, Tony imagined himself a Knight of the Round Table. Little did he know he would grow up to be a king. And that he would have a wizard by his side to lead him to either glory or destruction.

there is no heart for me like yours - turtle_abyss. (Soulmate AU! Wonderful. <3)

Being able to feel your soulmate - a phantom touch, a bone-deep awareness - is a divine torture. To know, but not see. To seek, but not find. To feel someone holding your hand and not be able to hold theirs.

Grace - StrangeMischief. (*cries in beautiful fic* Happy ending!)

“Pain’s an old friend.”

Us...Me - StrangeMischief. (This will hurt you. So melancholy. Pepper and Tony live their life, and Tony remembers. Not a happy ending.)

“I don’t believe in happily ever after.”

One-Thousand Cranes - FriendlyNeighborhoodFangirls. (Self rec, sorry. Hopeful ending.)

After it all, a man with shaking hands makes a wish.

courtesy - deathofglitter. (Dealing with the fourteen-million futures. So good.)

Stark looked at him like he looked at the amulet that rested on his chest like a steady promise - dutiful, a bit burdened, and trying to hold a profound lack of personal emotion whatsoever, still personal enough to protect as anyone would a precious object.

La Douleur Exquise - BananasofThorns, StrangeMischief. (More pain. Pepper and Tony, and Stephen watching and trying not to wish. Very good, no happy ending.)

The before was easy. There were fewer boxes in their minds and no chains around their hearts. There was no hurt. No tears. No dreams.

But those days were long gone.

Stigmata - babywarg (morphaileffect). (AU! Soulmates again. Very interesting, beautifully done.)

Since Stephen was little, mysterious wounds have appeared and disappeared on his body, leaving mysterious scars. His mother says it's because he's one of a Pair, and he's absorbing pain meant for someone else.

*wipes brow* PHEW! That gotta a little more in-depth than I first intended... Have fun, my MysticIron friends. Happy quarantine.

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colorseeingchick · 3 years

Note

We talked about this already, so here I am making my humble request to be matched up with a demon slayer boy....

I would include more information here but you know who I actually am 😤

(And I do wanna say congrats on 200!! Ily💕💕)

IS THIS??? MY BETA READER??? BLESSING MY ASKBOX???

You’ve subjected yourself to a hell you cannot escape. I’m so very excited to match you up with a boy I know little about from a fandom you know NOTHING about 🤩 I match you with….

Sanemi Shinazugawa

Now you might be asking, “En, why did you match me with this man?” well, there a couple of reasons. The first one is because you told me a few hours ago “as long as you don’t match me with the odd boar man, it’ll be okay.” While I do think the boar man is your soulmate, Sanemi is another good fit. Sanemi and you would have a wonderful banter established with a lot of play fighting but also a lot of support. Y’all are the types to be strong enough to deal with each other’s bs - and if that’s not love I don’t know what is.

Note to anyone who chooses to read this matchup :know that this shouldn’t be taken seriously LMAO I'm an anime only and know little of Sanemi so far! But I love him SO MUCH AHHH

Also shoutout @hoebirama7 for helping me learn about Sanemi more!

You’d meet Sanemi at the main estate where the head of the demon slayers live. Let’s say you were a demon slayer who was travelling with the main characters, Tanjiro, Nezuko, Zenitsu, and Inosuke (the boar man). You’d get pulled to the main estate with them. When there, you heard about how Sanemi did some crazy things to your little friend Nezuko (just like, stabbing her in front of her brother) and you were like “that’s so much.”

Your next thought was “who the fuck does this man think he is?” From there you swore you’d hate him and you’d square up with him on SIGHT. You were ready to throw verbal insults when you saw him.

He was casually in the Butterfly Estate (where you and the boys were resting to recover) and when you saw him, you just gave him a lookTM. He obviously didn’t take well to being sassed with his eyes, so he asked if you had a problem. And he was surprised when you said yes, said “You’re an ass,” and then you walked away. His eyes went wide and he was ready to throw a sarcastic comment back but you were already gone.

The next time he and you met was in the midst of battle. You were holding off a bunch of demons but accidentally injured your ankle, leaving you in the path of danger. That was when he came swinging in, taking all the demons out, and went to pick you up.

“Do I seem like some damsel in distress to you? I don’t need saving!”

“You don’t? Fine then.” He drops you (yes drops you) and walks away. Out of nowhere, another demon charges in to attack you, and while you prepare for the worst, the demon is beheaded before you realize it.

“Be stubborn later.” He picked you up and smirked a bit as you make a face but don’t reject his offer.

You met him a few days later, once again at the Butterfly Estate while you were healing up. But this time when you passed by him, you stopped him and said, “Hey, I just wanna say I do appreciate you saving me.”

“That’s not what you said the first time we met.”

“Well I still think you’re an ass.”

He scoffed, “Next time I’ll leave you to the demons,” before storming off again.

While you weren’t hesitant to tell him off to his face, you had to admit you did appreciate his muscles the way he saved you. So maybe you could be a little bit nicer to him. Only a little.

He heard of you next when he got a message that his brother was hurt and saved by another member of the corps - that member being you. He contemplated sending his messenger crow to thank you, but then he decided it was a weird thing to want to do, so he just went to go visit his healing brother. Luckily for him, you were there again.

“Are you always injured or…?” He asked when he saw you.

“Funny, because you’re here every time I am too, SO-”

“Brother, are you flirting?”

“Why the fuck are you out of bed? You were weak enough to get injured, and now you have the guts to talk back? Idiot.” Sanemi ripped into his younger brother on the spot before storming off. You ran into him later, and asked him about it. You saw what was going on.

“You care for him, you can admit that, right?”

“What?” He was taken aback.

“I’m the same way with my brothers -except, well, I’m not as… rough I guess. But all little brothers are dumb. But I know you do that outta love.”

You gave a small smile before leaving him be.

Let’s just say you left him a little shocked. He didn’t expect for someone to get it (even if you were skeptical of his method).

You two then got close when you were deployed on the same mission. It was full of a lot of back and forth ‘fighting’ which was banter. But you both agreed you loved hating on Giyuu (the love of my life who you said had a long face >:( ) and it was an odd bonding point for you two.

You found yourself becoming fond of the explosive and skilled man. And as he spent more time with you, listened to your random stories, and realized he saw eye to eye with you (even though you were better at expressing your thoughts), he developed a soft spot for you.

Settling down as a demon slayer was a tough thing to do. And yet, as he finished his mission with you, he realized he didn’t want you to be in anymore danger - and that he’d like to protect you as well.

He wouldn’t really ask you out. Like, it was such an odd thing for him to do. But when another demon slayer was being very flirty with you, he found himself getting ready to fight. Luckily you beat him to the punch by turning down the man.

He asked you why you did.

“Wasn’t interested in being with him.”

“...What about me? Are you, uh… interested in being with me?” He wasn’t used to saying stuff like that at ALLLL.

You’d look at him and go, “I’ll give it a go.”

In a relationship, Sanemi would find you to be surprisingly supportive. You were so good at validating his feelings and actions ( you were his lovely enabler). But you weren’t afraid to question his impulsive decisions, and he came to respect that, too. You were a respectable partner.

You on the other hand would probably appreciate the care he has to give. While he wasn’t a himbo, he had the heart of one. He was surprisingly caring, good at remembering small details, and very observant of your state of being. Though he would never say anything, he’d show it all through his actions. He’d bring you your favorite food, and would always listen to all your crazy mission stories.

He’d even manage to go with you to one of the sports events of the time. Though he didn’t know what was going on, he loved the way your face lit up when you were angry at the players, engaging with the plays, and just overall so lively. He thought it was so fun to see that side of you.

He’d also open up to you about his relationship with his brother. While it was tough, he enjoyed knowing you had his back and continued to share with you. You were a good listener.

When on longer missions apart, you’d send your crows to send updates to one another just to make sure the other was okay.

All in all y’all have a funny banter filled relationship that also was very supportive and soft. It may have started off with you two being enemies, but it ends with lovers HEHE my favorite

Just what you deserve :D

~~~

THis is what you asked for Ma'am but I also asked you to send one so I hope you don't hate me indefinitely after this pls continue to beta read my anime content THANK YOUUUU

#csc hits 200 #colorseeingchick milestone

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theycallmebeccawrites · 4 years

Text

Chris & Ellie Series: Episode 23

Hello lovelies! Hope you guys are having a good day and if not.. I hope tomorrow is better for you. I went back and forth between posting this episode today or waiting until next week...but y’all know I can’t wait... just waiting this long has been killing me haha.

Anyway, with this episode the focus of the main episode (vs the half episodes) is switching to Chris while Ellie will be the focus of the half episodes. That will end once they’re back together again! How long will that be? You’ll just have to wait and find out. 😏

Enjoy this episode, it’s a long one (for me at least). And I’ll catch y’all next time.

xoxo Becca xoxo

Pairing: Chris Evans x Ellie Spencer (OFC)

Rating: PG-13

Warnings: language

Episode Summary: Chris and his buddies in Las Vegas following the filming of Avengers two.

Disclaimer: This work of fiction is not to be reposted, used or translated without my permission.

This episode can also be read on AO3.

The Chris and Ellie series is primarily chronological. It begins with a flash forward to 2016 and has a few other scenes in the future. However, the majority of their story is told in chronological order starting in 2013 and going through 2017. Each episode starts with a date to help you place it within the story.

The Chris & Ellie Series Masterlist | Chris & Ellie Masterlist

Episode 22.5

Episode 23: Viva Las Vegas

September 2014

Ready for a night on the town, Chris sat on the sofa in the main living area of the penthouse that he had rented for himself and his friends in celebration of Brock and Tessa expecting their first baby.

Having come straight to Las Vegas after filming had wrapped on the second Avengers movie, Chris had been in town since last night while his friends had only arrived from LA that afternoon. He'd taken the master bedroom and had left the other four to figure out sleep arrangements for themselves. There was always a fight, but in the end, they all usually crashed on the closest bed available regardless of the decisions made earlier in the evening.

90's club music played on the penthouse sound system, making Chris feel more comfortable. It had all been too big and too quiet last night when he'd arrived. He'd planned to just go straight to bed, but that had been derailed when he'd gone into the ensuite bathroom and saw the large bathtub. His thoughts had instantly gone to Ellie and her love of taking baths; specifically, in the large soaking tub in his bathroom at home.

With his mind plagued with thoughts, he'd spent thirty minutes swimming laps in the private pool before taking a shower in the guest bathroom and going to bed, with the doors to the ensuite closed.

"Do you want to talk about it?" a voice asked from behind him.

Pulled out of his thoughts, Chris turned and saw Chucky Kellie standing in the doorway.

Not sure what to say, Chris stayed quiet, but Chucky took that as an invitation to join him.

"Tanya talked to Ellie," Chucky explained. "They invited her to the baby shower back in July. She said that you guys broke up."

"You and Ellie broke up?" another voice piped in.

"I was wondering why you looked like someone had stolen your favorite stuffed animal," a third voice said.

A grunt followed that comment and Chris didn't have to look behind him to know that Bryant had just elbowed Ray in the stomach for his remark.

"Are you guys going to go into the room or are we going to just stand here all night?" the last of his friends, Brock, asked.

Their arrival had given Chris time to think about whether or not he wanted to talk about the Ellie situation. He knew if he said he wasn't ready, they'd all go along with it and they'd go out to dinner and do a bit of gambling just like they'd planned. But even he knew it was time, past time, in fact.

Ever since that fateful day in front of his house, he'd made a point to be honest with himself even if the truth hurt. It had been easier, he supposed, thousands of miles away and busy with work. But now he was officially on a break from filming until the new year. It had seemed ideal, when he'd been planning it, to have fall and winter to relax and get back a sense of peace. But now that it had started, it seemed almost overwhelming. Especially since he had yet to decide where he was going to spend said time off.

One of the guys cleared his throat, subtly reminding Chris that they were all waiting for him to decide if he was up to talking about it or not.

Sighing, Chris said, "Ellie and I broke up."

The lack of reaction made him wonder if they'd all already known. He hadn't known Tanya to be a gossip, but he supposed she would have had to explain Ellie's absence at the baby shower to the other wives. Said wives would have then passed on the information to their husbands and then everyone would have known.

"Did she break up with you?" Ray probed, gently.

"It might have been easier if she had," Chris mused, defeatedly.

The time had come, he realized, to divulge everything that had been going on in his head and in his relationship with Ellie to someone else. As odd as it seemed, the words started coming to him easier than he thought they would. He supposed it was because, while his friends knew Ellie, they had been his best friends since before he'd been famous. They always had his back.

He knew Scott did, too. But it was different.

At the end of the day, Chris knew that his brother would choose him over anyone else that came between them. But when it came to Ellie, Chris knew she had a special bond with his brother. Scott had been with them virtually every setup of the way as they'd gone from being friends to more. And now Scott had been by Ellie's side through the aftermath of it all.

"The first time Ellie and I met," Chris found himself telling his friends. "I was completely naked." He'd never planned to share that story with anyone, but with these four, he felt like he needed to be honest and start at the beginning.

As expected, the four idiots spent a good five minutes laughing after he shared how he and Ellie had met when his mom had hired her as a housekeeper behind his back.

Once they'd calmed down, he continued the story. How he and Ellie had only spent a few weeks with each other before they'd had to share a bed not once, but twice. Then how the two of them, and Scott, had gotten close watching sports and spending time together.

"Wait, let me get something straight," Bryant interrupted. "Are you saying that the two of you hadn't even kissed when we had the kickoff party?"

"We hadn't," Chris confirmed and then followed it up with, "Did it seem like we had?"

His friends exchanged looks before Brock said, "We thought the two of you had been dating when you brought her to the wedding. Your chemistry…"

"What Brock is trying to say, is that you and Ellie seemed like you'd already known each other for a long time when we all met her," Chucky said, cutting in. "The two of you just looked so at ease."

"Even Kady and I noticed," Ray chimed in. "And we spent maybe 5 minutes with you guys."

"And then the way you two were sassing each other at the kickoff party," Bryant added.

Chris nodded as their comments brought to mind one of the fears that had plagued him; that everything had been too easy from the beginning with Ellie.

"It was easy, easier than it had ever been with anyone I've ever dated," he admitted to them. "Ellie and I spent a lot of time at home watching sports. Scott was with us most of the time, but not all the time. We just fell into an easy pattern and then I kissed her at Fenway Park after the Red Sox won the World Series."

"DUDE!" Ray exclaimed, making them all laugh. "Sorry, but that's just awesome." Considering Chris knew that Ray and Kady had met at a Dodgers game, he wasn't surprised his friend felt that way.

"Is that when you two started to officially date?" Brock asked, redirecting the conversation.

Chris shook his head and then chuckled at the memory. "She returned the kiss," he said. "But then she hid from me the next day. And then we went to a Halloween party with my brother and younger sister. I cornered her in a room and made her talk to me." Realizing how bad that sounded he quickly continued, "I mean, I waited for her to get out of the bathroom and asked her if we could talk."

Ray made kissing noises and Chris threw a pillow at him.

"Did you two kiss that night?" Chucky prompted and then smirked when Chris's face flushed.

"Fuck you all," Chris grumbled as they laughed. "Yes, fine. We made out and we might have gone farther if another couple hadn't barged into the room."

Ray let out a catcall.

"How are you married?" Brock asked him.

"Kady loves me," Ray said with a shrug. "But back to story time, Evans. Is that when you two started hooking up?"

Chris shook his head. "She went back to LA the next day and I stayed back east," he told them. "But after kissing her, I knew I wanted to kiss her again. And I really missed her. We had been spending so much time together and then suddenly we weren't. I mean, we texted a lot, but it wasn't the same."

"And when you said you wanted to kiss her again, you mean you wanted to date her right?" Bryant asked.

"Yes, definitely," Chris replied though he felt his heart twinge at the memory. He'd been so convinced last fall that he and Ellie were meant to be together. "She hadn't been so sure. She didn't want to ruin our friendship if it didn't work out."

Those words sucked the humor out of the room and out of the corner of his eyes, he saw his friends straighten. Shit was getting real now.

"I told her that it would be ok," he said with a sigh. "That we owed it to ourselves to explore our feelings. Because she told me she liked me, too." He told them about Ellie's encouragement while he was directing his movie, how he'd encouraged her to submit her resume for an editing job and how she'd told him over the phone on Christmas Eve that she wanted to give them a try.

He didn't get graphic in the details of what had happened in January, but he confirmed that he had taken her up to the bed and breakfast for a romantic getaway. And that he'd helped her celebrate the Seahawks' Super Bowl victory.

"So what happened?" Brock asked him. "When we saw you guys at the Super Bowl, you could hardly keep your hands to yourself. But then at the premiere…"

"They were secretly dating," Chucky reminded him. "He couldn't have his hands all over her."

"Obviously, but Brock is right, things weren't the same that night," Bryant argued before he looked at Chris. "Did something happen?"

"Other than getting messed up in my own head, no," Chris admitted. He sighed and told them about his journal. He knew that Chucky knew about them, after all the two of them had shared a bedroom at one point, but he didn't know the full context of them.

"And you completely shut her out when you got home?" Brock said with a frown after Chris told them.

Chris nodded. "I was so stuck in my own head, I didn't know what to do," he confessed.

The joking from earlier had stopped now that he'd gotten into the serious part of his tale. They'd been through situations like this with him before and he trusted that they'd pull him back from going too far.

Taking a deep breath, he dove headfirst into the abyss that was the downfall of his and Ellie's relationship.

"I wanted to be with her," he told them. "But at the same time, my head kept telling me that it wasn't the right time to be in a real relationship. She didn't press me to get out of the house, to go out in public with her. So we were able to keep it a secret."

He should have taken her out. He realized that now. He shouldn't have kept her a secret.

"Then everyone came for the premiere and there I was, dating someone my mom really liked and I couldn't bring myself to even tell my mom about it," he continued. "My mom isn't stupid though. I'm sure she knew what was going on. But I couldn't bring myself to say anything about it. And I don't know if Ellie wanted to tell her or if she was just following my lead on the whole situation."

He should have told his mom. She would have been happy for them both.

"And the real kicker is that I had to watch my sister introduce my girlfriend to my dad," he said. "It should have been me. That should have been a special moment for the three of us. But I just… I couldn't."

He felt a hand squeeze his shoulder, offering him strength with his confession.

"Tara figured it out and said she approved," he told them. "Then I went on the press tour… and came home to find Ellie's older sister and her husband in town. They weren't staying at the house, but we had dinner with them. I liked them and I thought they liked me, too. But then the next night…"

He paused to gather his thoughts, because it was getting harder for him to talk about it all now. He thought he'd gotten past the pain, but it had been simmering under the surface.

"The next night, Ellie had a fight with her sister, who didn't like that she was living in my house, working for me and sleeping with me," he explained. "She offered Ellie money to help her find her own place. Ellie didn't take it well and she came home upset. She told me about it…"

"And it fed into the fears you already had in your head," Brock surmised.

Chris nodded then explained, "I pulled away again, but not completely. It wasn't fair to Ellie. I see that now. I wasn't there for her, but I wanted her in my bed and to be there for me."

He felt a mixture of shame and relief as he admitted it out loud.

"She tried to get through to me, but I was so stuck in my head," he sighed. "Then I had a bad dream and made a huge mistake. Easily the biggest mistake of my life." He took a deep breath, trying to work up the courage to explain.

"Here," Ray said, tapping his hand with a shot glass filled with liquid. "I think you need this."

Chris accepted the shot and tossed it back. It burned, but it was almost a welcome relief.

"Do you need a break?" Brock asked him. "We can order room service."

Chris wanted to say no, wanted to continue, but he knew he needed a break.

"Get me a burger," he told Brock. "I'm going to get some air."

Getting up, Chris went outside to the private balcony. Somehow, they'd managed to create a relaxing outdoor oasis in the middle of Las Vegas and hundreds of feet in the air.

While he felt better getting stuff off his chest, he knew the worst was yet to come. He knew his friends wouldn't judge him for his actions, but he didn't know if any of them could mask their disappointment in him.

Hearing the door open behind him, Chris looked over and saw Brock. "We ordered dinner, they said it would be about forty minutes. We told them not to rush since we're nobody special."

A chuckle escaped Chris's lips. His friends were part of the reason he was who he was. They helped keep him grounded.

"You ready?" Brock asked him.

"No, but I want to get it over with," Chris replied. "Do we have beer?"

"Ray and Bryant were popping tops when I left the other room," Brock told him.

Chris followed his friend back inside and to the main living area. Sure enough, five beers were sitting on the coffee table with a bag of chips.

"Thought we might want a snack," Chucky said with a shrug.

Once they were all settled, Chris continued his story. "I had a dream that Ellie and I were together and we had a kid. But she was leaving me because I couldn't give her enough time because of my job," he told him. "And in the dream, she said she should have listened to her sister."

"Fuck," Ray breathed.

"Add the dream to my other thoughts and it was the making of a bad situation in my head," Chris said with a nod.

"So what was the mistake?" Bryant asked cautiously.

"I left," Chris told him. Then clarified. "In the middle of the night. Without saying anything to her."

"Dude…" Ray said, his voice laced with disbelief.

"And when you say you left?" Brock prompted.

"I packed my suitcase and left early for filming," Chris replied.

"Fuck," all four of his friends chorused.

"What did Ellie say when you two talked?" Brock asked him.

Chris didn't say anything as he felt his stomach churning. He focused on the beer bottle in his hand as he tried to will back the emotions that were bubbling just under the surface.

"Chris, please tell me that you and Ellie have talked," Brock said, quietly.

"I can't," he whispered as he blinked back his tears. "And now it's too late."

"What do you mean it's too late," Ray demanded.

"It's been 5 months," Chris said with a shrug. "I thought she was just mad at first. Which I understood, but I thought she'd at least make sure I was ok. And then when she didn't…" He took a shaky breath. "I texted Scott, checking on her. And that's what really ended it. I shouldn't have involved him and I did. And it's a fucking disaster now."

A part of him wanted to stop there, but he knew he couldn't. "I went to see her at the end of July when I found out she was moving out of my house," he explained. "There was a guy with her. And it was clear that she'd moved on."

"Clear how?" Bryant asked, his question immediately followed by a grunt of pain. "Fuck off! It was an honest question. I mean if he saw her making out with some guy, then yeah, she moved on. But if it was just a hug, maybe it was just innocent."

"I didn't stay long enough to see them kissing," Chris told him. "I told the driver to leave as soon as I saw them hugging."

A knock on the door of the penthouse saved him from having to answer any more questions. At least at that moment. He knew his friends wouldn't let the conversation stop there.

Once the food was rolled in, they migrated to the dining table to eat their dinner. Chris was silent as he ate, but the other four made small talk.

It wasn't until an hour later, when they were taking turns playing pool that Chucky asked, "Let's pretend Ellie hadn't moved on for a second. If you knew she was still single, what would you do?"

"I don't know," Chris admitted. "I fucked up."

"Forget that for now, too," Chucky said. "How do you feel about Ellie right now?"

"I think I'm in love with her." The words came out of Chris's mouth without a second of thought. They caught even him off guard, but as they settled, he realized that it was the truth. He'd spent the last six months listening to his head and ignoring his heart. Clearly, his heart had known what was really going on.

"Does that change anything for you?" Brock questioned.

"Yeah," Chris said with a nod. "But not in the way you think. I didn't treat Ellie like I should have. If this guy she is with now is treating her like she should be treated, what right do I have to ruin that for her?"

"But you love her," Ray retorted.

"Isn't there a saying about how sometimes you have to love someone enough to let them go?" Chris said with a small shrug. "Besides, I'm spending the fall and winter back home in Sudbury."

"You are?" Bryant asked. "Since when?"

"Just decided," Chris replied. He shook his head. "I can't go back to the house in LA. There are too many memories there that I'm not sure I'm ready to process."

He saw his friends exchange looks but in the end they all nodded.

"Just know we're here if you need us," Chucky told him.

"I know, thank you," Chris said.

A few days later, Chris went home to Massachusetts and his mom's house. It took him a few days to settle in and to fit himself into the rhythm of the household, but he knew it was the best place for him to be.

It was at the start of his second full week that his mom had gotten the email from Ellie that he had suspected was coming: her two weeks’ notice. His mom had forwarded him the email, since it concerned his house, and he hadn't planned on reading it at all. Then, he'd woken up in the middle of the night with a sudden urge to hear Ellie's voice. He knew he couldn't call her, but he knew reading the email would let him hear her in a way and maybe offer him some closure.

Dear Lisa,

I want to thank you for taking a chance on me last year. You could have hired anyone to be the housekeeper and we both know there were people more qualified than I am. Instead, you chose me and for that I am eternally grateful.

Between my hours at the bookstore and my editing jobs, I find myself running out of hours in the day and during the week. Given that Scott is living in Chris's house permanently, I feel like it is time for me to move on from my job there.

Thank you again for taking a chance on me. It was the kindness of yourself and your family that helped me get to where I am now, finally doing the job I always dreamed of.

Sincerely,

Ellie Spencer

A bittersweet feeling came over him as he closed the email app on his phone. Setting the phone back on the bedside table, he stared up at the dark ceiling. He'd hoped to find relief in reading her words, but he hadn't. Instead, he longed to actually hear her talk. To hear her laugh.

As he remembered her laughter, a small smile tugged on his lips. It wasn't one of those melodic ones that people rave about. It was a real laugh. The kind of laugher that included snorts, wheezes and a fully body response. God, he'd loved making her laugh.

Sighing, Chris rolled onto his side. While his mom thought Ellie was just too busy to go to the house, he knew the truth. Ellie was cutting all her ties to him, and after everything he had put her through, he couldn't say he blamed her.

Then his thoughts went to his brother. What would this all mean for Scott's relationship with Ellie? Would she cut him off, too? He hoped she wouldn't and not only for the selfish reason of knowing how she was doing. No, he knew that she was an important person in his brother's life and Scott deserved the best.

Episode 23.5

Want to find me off tumblr? I'm @beccatheycallme on twitter. I also post my stories on AO3.

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fizzingwizard · 3 years

Text

Alright and now for episode 23! Which was a lot more interesting. Still lacking in pertinent ways but at least it got some stuff moving, and there were a few small but very nice character moments.

I took a LOT of Taichi spam this week you guys. The animation was slightly better than normal and my boy was just so good.

At parkour. He’s good at parkour.

More below!

We pick up where we left off last week, with Devimon arriving in his true form and picking a fight over Poyomon. He’s so threatened by a wad of jelly.

He does seem a bit weird though. More on that later.

The quintessential Taichi picture.

And just a cute one.

So okay, Devimon makes mincemeat of MetalGreymon and WereGarurumon. Like he wipes the floor with them. Even though they should be a level above him. I was like what’s going on. Clearly dark powers are giving him extra strength, but this still seemed like too much...

Yamato yells for Takeru to go hide. Taichi then yells for Yamato to go hide xD However Devimon has no trouble destroying all their possible hiding spots and attacking them.

Takeru worries about his brother :’<

Taichi quickly tries to think of a strategy but yup “Hide” is all he can come up with.

They communicate via digivice and Yamato has something of a better strategy but... it still just amounts to hiding.

Meanwhile their partners continue to get their butts kicked.

MetalGreymon: Hey watch it I just got this painted!

WereGaurumon: My nails! I just had them done!

Taichi: Would you two stop fussing, you’re so vain!

Taichi: We’ve got more important things to worry about! Like my hair!

Meanwhile in the real world... the four are together and Koushirou updates Jou and Mimi on the situation, which boils down to Not Good. The tank ships are still on a collision course. On top of that, Koushirou notices that the data being absorbed by Calmaramon’s... idk what to call it, data collection tower? thing, is being sent directly to the digital world. He guesses it’s going to be used to power the creature whose name I forgot they fought before.

This guy.

Koushirou also guesses this probably means Taichi and Yamato are in some deep shit rn.

Taichi is pretty smart too... he’s able to tell that Devimon is able to manipulate the dark mists and that’s how he’s able to find their hiding spots and attack them so easily.

Here’s the evil crystal that I would have thought was from Sailor Moon. Ahhh evil is so beautiful. And purple. Hmmm, the Crest of Knowledge is also purple, and absorption of data is converted to power.... GUYS KOUSHIROU’S GOING TO GO DARK.

Kidding, kidding. I would totally watch it though.

So the others go to fight Calmaramon and destroy the tower to help Taichi and Yamato. But, uh, they didn’t count on Calamaramon’s tentaclesx ;D

Kabuterimon makes the classic amateur mistake of DRAMATICALLY ANNOUNCING HIMSELF when he swerves in to rescue the girls...

... and he gets his just desserts. :P

Meanwhile Taichi and Yamato... are still losing. So who steps up to the plate but...

Takeru and Poyomon! Lol!

No seriously, this scene SCREAMED of the one in 99 where Hikari sacrifices herself to protect Yamato and Sora. I was really expecting Takeru to do the same thing here. “Leave my brother alone! Take me instead!”

But, I guess, since he’s a boy, he’s less self-sacrificial and more just... irrationally strong...

His conviction results in evolution!

Poyomon becomes Tokomon! THANK GOODNESS. I could not handle another “poyo, poyo!”

Devimon takes one look at this pink-cheeked thing and FREEEEEEAKS OUUUUUT.

“You remind me... of someone I once knew... you have... the same eyes... GRRRRRRRRR!!!!”

he didn’t say that but he totally should have lol. Now someone please make an edit of Angemon where he takes off his helmet and he has Tokomon eyes underneath x’D

Data readings on Koushirou’s computer start going haywire! The data is being sent somewhere fast!

I was expecting some kind of power up but I wasn’t expecting full on evolution. Because yup. That’s what goes down. Devimon evolves.

And here’s where he gets weird. His evolution seems painful. Unnatural. He doesn’t seem exactly pleased with it, to be frank. He’s really agitated by Tokomon but he doesn’t do much in the way of monologuing and it’s not even clear that the evolution is by his own design. It just kind of seems to happen. Then, once he does evolve, he’s much less talkative. This is generally not the sign of sanity or even sentience. It’s like Devimon is imprisoned by his evolution, which goes on a rampage.

Neodevimon. Actually, original Devimon is scarier but :P

Lol and then Tokomon gets blown out of Takeru’s arms and goes for a tumble while Takeru runs frantically after him xD Great moment.

Rollin rollin rollin, though the streams are swollen...

NeoDevimon is very powerful but y’know... WereGarurumon just STOOD there. This... this is totally his fault that he gets hurt here x’D

Taichi is displeased with this development, and yet, still cute in his displeasure.

Finally Koushirou manages to get through! Taichi is too preoccupied to jump for joy or anything but you can see that he’s excited. “Koushirouuuuu please save us!!!” basically that’s what’s going on

However he’s right away blown over and his digivice scatters and the signal drops...

Yamato is very Stressed.

However, contact with Koushirou has rejuvenated Taichi.

LIKE THE PHOENIX HE RISES FROM THE ASHES

Taichi: “FUCK THIS SHIIIIIIIIIT!”

His renewed conviction becomes power. Yeah, that’s a thing, we know.

Meanwhile, in the human world, the others have worked out that Taichi and Yamato are fighting and need help, and they combine the powers of their own passionate hearts in a classic shonen anime trope.

Koushirou gets a special moment all to himself! It’s really fast but still, the episode makes a point of focusing on Koushirou’s desire to connect with his friends and help them. I choose to believe this a nod to Koushirou’s significant role in the show and a way of saying “Sorry they’re not all together right now but they will be soon and characters other than Taichi and Yamato will get to do cool things in the not so distant future!”

Their partners are then able to defeat Calmaramon and destroy the data collection tower.

BOOM, baby.

Meanwhile our heroes who never sleep manage to defeat Devimon. Which, I figured, meant he’d retreat for now, but...

He freaking dies! Yup, that’s right! Disintegrates!! I was like what the heck?? This was a Boss Battle???? It had none of the signs of being a boss battle other than the boss being present and it wasn’t even that hard...

However, it’s not over till it’s over...

... Tokomon looks on NeoDevimon’s death kind of creepily. Like, the episode makes a point of showing us Tokomon’s reaction, not just the group’s. So... I feel like this is gonna be relevant. I COULD BE WRONG. But I just personally wouldn’t stick this bit in without it meaning something. But that something could be pretty much anything so we still don’t know much.

The sailors aboard the tankers whose control systems are restored at the last second are pretty darn relieved anyway.

This was my favorite moment in epiosde, Mimi flinging herself over Koushirou and knocking Jou out of the way to hug Sora in her enthusiasm over their victory xD awww Mimi

Yamato wants to know what’s with Taichi. Taichi’s like, “The others helped us from afar, I just know it...” AND THAT’S WHY HE’S BEST BOY.

Yamato gives Takeru an adorable pat on the head and tells him good job. Only thing that could have made this moment cuter would have been if he also patted Tokomon’s head. BECAUSE HELLO. KID JUST EVOLVED. SAY HI AND TELL HIM YOUR NAMES AT LEAST.

But then! Darknightmon uses the dark crystal thingy and...!

Le gasp! NeoDevimon’s corpse emerges from the ground...

Taichi has a flashback to another time they thought they won only for their defeated opponent to be infused with dark energy and resurrect...

... uh I forgot this guy’s name too >_>

Taichi: “Wow I never saw this coming!”

Well, I did. :P Due to being over ten years old...

We end with NeoDevimon’s mask cracking off!

Creepy!

Final thoughts... it now kind of looks like Darknightmon is the one pulling Devimon’s strings rather than the other way around. But my guess is that’s not the case. It could also be that Devimon told Darknightmon to do this - after all, Devimon used the stone’s power to evolve Darknightmon before, and this is just the reverse of that. Or it could be they are equals and in cahoots with each other. I definitely think there’s an even greater, bigger Bad out there that they either work for or are afraid of etc something like that, I think we probably all feel sure of that at least. But Devimon in this episode really surprised me in the ways he seems to lack agency. He seemed like a pawn of evil rather than the chessmaster himself.

So next week! Looks lit!

Devimon’s new evolution? or power up? whatever is creepier than NeoDevimon so that’s a relief.

BUT THIS IS EVEN CREEPIER HOLY CRAP TAICHI! Get some sleep, your eyes are all red! (And he’s injured. His hand is where he got hurt two weeks ago fighting Splashmon right? He got hit with miasma. I wonder if this is the same wound and if it’s somehow controlling him due to the dark energy getting into his system... But everyone’s more or less been hit with the dark energy at this point so maybe not. Anyway, CREEPY EYES, CREEPY CREEPY EYES.)

Also Yamato DIES. He DIES y’all. *funeral march plays* Hmm, Tokomon looks hungry...

Then we got this bit which in case you can’t tell is Takeru being awesome. So I figured, ahh, THIS is the boss battle, and we’re gonna see Angemon again already... weird as that sounds :P

HOW-E-VER

We also get this???? Taichi silhouetted against a brilliant light????? What does it mean? I mean we know Takeru has healing powers so I’m fully expecting that to happen but uhh are we also going to canonize Taichi next week? lol. Saint Taichi. I love him the best but I will be a bit miffed if next week IS the big boss battle and Takeru’s role is “power up Taichi so he can kill it” and that’s it... But I guess we’ll have to see.

It does rather look like they saved the animation budget for next week, the preview was nuts x’D Can’t wait.

#digimon adventure:#digimon adventure 2020 #digimon adventure reboot #fizz watches digimon 2020 #digimon

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marauders-groupie · 4 years

Note

This basically turned into me going through all your fics (again) to find some of my faves oops. I would love an inside scoop on I'd Love to Change the World but I Don't Know What to Do, Livewire, or Feel It in the Space Between!

Ahh, that’s lovely to hear! Thank you! <3

Director’s Commentary: I’d Love to Change the World but I Don’t Know What to Do (Bellarke modern royals/arranged marriage AU)

First things first, Nat @alltheworldsinmyhead suggested this idea to me and I’ve loved her ever since.

Clarke doesn’t know a lot about the revolution in the streets of The Kingdom of Ark. The only thing she remembers is Wells making her get up in the middle of the night, eyes like a forest animal caught in wildfire, saying, “We’ve got to go.”

I really wanted this beginning to be impactful. I had the whole scene in my head - royalty looking back over her shoulder, only to find her home burning.

One thing is true about the revolution and it is that it devours its own children.

This is something that my dad once quoted to me: “Revolution devours its own children.” It became the leitmotif for the entire story because in the second part - I Just Want to Turn the Lights on in These Volatile Times - Bellamy was betrayed so yes, revolution had indeed planned to devour that particular child.

After the wedding, Clarke pretty much tells him the same thing:

“Let me tell you how this is going to go, Blake.” She draws closer to him, careful to stand her ground and to stop her voice from shaking because she is seething with rage – this boy wants nothing but power and he thinks it’s going to go so well now that he’s got it. “The king is dead, long live the king. Is the phrase familiar to you? Because no king is loved, every king is just tolerated. That’s how it goes. They’ll string you up the same they want to string my mother up.”

I really wanted to show the clash of their personalities through this fic, how they’re approaching the same goal with wildly different methods. I also wanted to emphasize the importance of being as careful as Clarke when changing the world.

Also, I wrote the sex scene to the tune of Jetta’s Start a Riot. (:

I was also going to write a Lincoln + Octavia one shot inspired by Joseph Brodsky’s poem, Belfast Tune.

***

Director’s Commentary: Livewire (Bellarke soulmate AU)

This was written during my “Oh my God, he’s Atlas, how d e e p” phase. In general, I don’t really understand why people like Livewire so much, but I do have a sweet spot for it. (:

Another thing is that I wrote so much soulmate AUs is because I love writing magical realism. The other part of the appeal was the fact that at the end of the day, there was still a choice. Soulmate or not, you get to choose whether that’s the person you want to be with, stars be damned.

"Maybe I am ridiculous for not caring, but." But it feels like it's not real, like the soulmate is just a dream, a haze bound to dissipate any moment now. "I have time."

You know that feeling when you’re with someone and you know that a first kiss between you two is somewhere down the line? You can feel that it’s bound to happen.

And because it’s a given, you make that sweet moment of electric anticipation last as long as possible, just savor it all.

This is partly the idea behind Clarke’s reluctance to meet her soulmate. She’s got time. He’s there already. What’s the rush? Make the delightful suspense last.

(I mean, she’s obviously angstier than me, too.)

A new drawing appears on Bellamy’s wrist when he starts working in the diner. It’s old, exposed brick and chipped away paint, linoleum floors that transport him to a different age and a creaky coffeemaker.

I really, really fucking love diners. I don’t know what does it for me, but like - checkered linoleum floors? Leather booths? Comforting hot coffee? Sign me the fuck up!!!

Idk if this is something people notice, but I have A LOT of diners in my fics.

The artist sits in the last booth every morning, takes her coffee with two sugars and frowns after the first taste. She never pours maple syrup on her pancakes, but she wants cream and gets it on her nose more often than she would like. Her fingers pull at her sleeves, tug them over her knuckles, and she looks like she’s cold even when it’s more than warm in the diner.

Love is attention, y’all!

Also, pay attention to how their relationship develops from there without them knowing they were soulmates. I think that’s really important, I try to incorporate that in my soulmate fics to reinforce the point of them liking each other as people, and making that the reason they’re going to be together - not stars or soulmarks or whatever.

They sit on the warm asphalt in front of a kebab kiosk, shoulder to shoulder, and Clarke is the one who reaches for him first, tentative.

I saw a picture of a girl wearing a gown and a leather jacket and just sitting on the pavement, and I loved it. Also, I love kebabs.

Personally, what I dislike the most about Livewire is that I didn’t go into detail on some aspects of Clarke and Bellamy as people. But I think it turned out okay anyway.

Also, the fic was titled after Oh Wonder’s Livewire. It’s a gorgeous song. :)))

***

Director’s Commentary: Feel It in the Space Between (Bellarke dancers AU)

Ahh look okay, listen, I’m a good dancer. A really good dancer. (In terms of club dancing, that is.) But the one thing I cannot do is relax my fucking shoulders. I deeply admire people who can, especially those who can wave their arms up in the air and everything.

This fic was born out of that particular frustration.

I also watched a lot of contemporary dancing videos on YouTube and they were just so, so stunning.

Dancing comes easy to some people, as easy as drinking water. They move and you can feel the unity with the universe in their bones. They move and it feels right.

To Clarke, dancing is blood and viscera, muscles spasming after a long practice, beads of sweat pooling in her collarbone. To her, it’s a battle, it’s a fight, it’s more bloody knuckles than soft swaying.

Dancing was also a good channel through which I could express Clarke’s fear of losing control and giving in.

I also really loved all the soft, golden glow-y scenes in the studio. They felt really tender to me and I enjoyed writing them. :)))

Clarke can’t cook for shit but he can. He putters around her kitchen with practiced ease as she sits on the kitchen island and pours them wine.

(...)

He flicks his water-soaked fingers at her and Clarke squeals, readying the tomato sauce-stained rag.

........ and then there was domestic intimacy.

My fics also contain a lot of scenes where Bellamy is cooking and Clarke’s just chilling on the counter, shooting shit.

(Probably because I, too, cannot cook, and I appreciate being fed well.)

Finally, the one thing I’d change would be that miscommunication - she thought he was rejecting her, and he was just surprised she kissed him. I don’t like using miscommunication as part of the plot because it always feels very lazy to me.

But it was something new to write, and I’m glad you liked it! :D

Do you want director’s commentary on a fic, section, or line?

#THANK YOU SO MUCH! <3 i hope you enjoyed the answers!#asks #spell-of-the-rain #bellarke ff #lana talks fic #i'd love to change the world #feel it in the space between #livewire

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sloppy-butcher · 4 years

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General hcs for a couple killers of your choice?

I had a lot of fun writing these! I tried to choose killers that aren’t so popular so hopefully, y’all can enjoy some different hc’s. Thank you for the ask

edit: i spent WAAAAAAYYYY too long on this, like god DAMN. idecided to only do two because.. i mean… look how much i wrote

General Killer HeadCanons

Demogorgon

Of course, the beast has no gender. The creature from the upside-down was not made to have sex or breed therefore it carries no genitalia/sexual desires. There are other creatures from the upside-down whose job it is to breed thus the Demo is made only to hunt and kill. However, for the sake of simplicity, it will be referred to as a male. In fact, it was the survivors and other killers who all simultaneously agreed that the Demo was a boy. There was something remotely male about him and when one started calling it “he” everyone else followed.

When he first arrived, the older, more civilized killers such as Evan and Adiris where all extremely put off by the beast. They all wondered why the Entity would entrust its food to… basically a wild animal. This job required a certain level of cognition and planning all of which he clearly lacked. But they were all surprised when the Demo performed his job perfectly. He understood what was needed of him and provided the necessary nourishment to his new master. It can even be said that maybe it was the doing of the Entity itself that made the Demo a reliable killer. Maybe it reached into his head and rewired him until he had gained a small level of human intelligence and retrain.

Regardless he is still an animal. His portals and connection to the upside-down, although limited within the Fog, gives Demo the ability to traverse the realm with ease. As a sort of precaution and insurance, during the time in which the Entity retreats into itself in order to recoup energy, It removes his bloodthirst. It drugs him and makes him placid and when he finds something fun to chew on, let’s say one of Sally’s dresses or Kazan’s kanabō, it removes his strength and makes his teeth blunt. His teeth leave no damage.

The other killer treats him like a stray dog. When they see him approaching them, they try to shoo him away. Anna threatens him with her hatchets, once even hitting his square between his shoulders. Even Herman, after finding out the Demo had no brain for him to cut open and dissect, shocks him if he ever gets too close to Lérys. The Legion members used to let the Demo hang out with them but after swallowing whole at 4 of their masks Frank finally said enough is enough and no longer allowed Demo into the lodge.

The Demo once encountered a survivor out in the woods. It was Jake who was alone and scavenging for new toolbox parts. When Jake realized that the Demo wasn’t going to attack him, he edged closer and offered the beast his shitty old toolbox. The Demo happily chewed on it and Jake discovered that he was ticklish under his chin. He found out that if he scratched in a certain way, Demo would almost purr and open his mouth exposing the many rows of teeth. Jake was repulsed by the sight and by his bad breath.

The Hag (Lisa Sherwood)

It can be assumed that Lisa came from the swamps around New Orleans sometime during 1920′s. She is the descendant of the enslaved Western Africans brought to America and with regard for her ability of ‘witchcraft’ she is related in some way to voodoo.

She lived in a small swamp village and was raised by the elders since her parents had to consistently work in the ever industrializing world. Regardless she enjoyed her life in the village surrounded by fellow children and being taught the ways of her people through her elders.

She went with her mother once into the nearby city and that was where she encountered jazz music. She fell in love with it immediately and begged her mother for a radio. This was also when she learned her name. “Lisa” her mother called her when they meet an intimidating businessman. That wasn’t what the elders back home called her and it confused her.

When she was chained in the basement of the cannibalistic family, fighting desperately for her life, she broke her right arm. She refused to scream and used a piece of your torn dress to tie the break together. This is the arm the Entity would later twist into the murderous claw.

It is because of this first encounter with the businessman and the many others like him, that Lisa developed a strong dislike for Evan. He spoke just like them and she associated him with them and all the horrible things they had done to her.

She is one of the few killers all the others know about. When newcomers arrive the Entity offers them a warning to stay out of the swamp. Lisa was a complicated case, so broken that there was no way to calm her down without destroying that killer instinct It craved. So instead, the Entity just told everyone to leave her alone completely but what it didn’t know that eventually, Lisa did calm down. At least, in the off-time she did.

Lisa mostly stays in her swamp but the few times she did go off to explore she encountered a few people. She liked Anna the most, although that’s not saying much. She liked that Anna could sing but hated how it didn’t give her the same feeling that jazz did. She can’t dance to Anna’s lullaby.

The best way to make friends with Lisa would probably be to just be around her. She won’t directly chase you out of her realm so if you were to sit amongst the reeds and quietly watch the dancing fireflies she’d allow it. She would be too tired from being hungry and angry all the time that she’d just stay away and not cause conflict.

One day she might walk past you and notice you drawing her teleporting mark on the ground around you. She’d look at them and produce a throaty growl which could be mistaken for annoyance or anger. But rather than attack you she’d begin to erase them all only to redraw them with her claw. She’d eventually look up to meet your eyes and you’d smile. She’s surprised. No ones smiled at her like that in so long.

#dead by daylight #dbd #dbd imagines #dbd the demogorgon #dbd the hag #lisa sherwood #lisa is babey and i honestly have so much shit about her

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katehuntington · 5 years

Text

Title: Ride With Me (part ten) Fandom: Supernatural AU Characters series: Reader, Dean Winchester, Bobby Singer, Ellen Singer-Harvelle, Jo Singer (Harvelle), Benny Lafitte, Garth Fitzgerald IV, Castiel Novek, and many more. Timeline: 2008 Pairing: Dean x Reader (eventually) Word count: ±6500 words Summary series: Y/N is a talented horse rider who is on her way to become a professional. In order to convince her father that she deserves the loan needed to start her own farm, she goes to Arizona for six months, to intern at a ranch owned by Bobby and Ellen Singer. Her future is set out, but then she meets a handsome horseman, who goes by the name of Dean Winchester. A heartwarming series about a cowboy who falls for the girl, letting go of the past and the importance of family. Summary part ten: Y/N is about to go on an adventure. Good thing she has her friend Jo to help her pack and her crush Dean to guide the way. Warnings series: NSFW, 18+ only! Fluff, angst, eventually smut. Swearing, smoking, alcohol intoxication, alcohol abuse. Mutual pining, heartbreak. Crying, nightmares, childhood trauma. Description of animal abuse, domestic violence, mentions of addiction. Financial problems, stress, mental breakdown. Description of blood and injury, hospital scenes, character death, grief. Music: The Man With The Harmonica - Ennio Morricone, Hide And Seek - Gareth Dunlop (end scene). Check out ‘Kate Huntington’s Ride With Me playlist’ on Spotify! Author’s note: Thank you @kittenofdoomage and @girl-with-a-fandom-fettishfor helping me. You girls are awesome betas. Thank you for your endless patience!

Ride With Me Masterlist

“Wait, you’re not planning on bringing all that with you, are ya?” Y/N’s eyes leave the three pairs of boots from which she still has to choose. Not to decide what two sets to leave behind, but which to wear and which to pack. Jo stands in the doorway of her tiny room, staring at the bed, which is covered in flannels, shirts, tops, several hats, jeans, jackets, sweaters, towels, socks, matching underwear, swimwear, a makeup bag, and a toiletry bag. Even a hair iron and of course her phone charger lay amongst the collection of items that one way or another are going to have to fit into her bag.

The season is coming to an end now that September has reached its final days. It’s time to move the two-year-old horses down from the summer reservation. Bobby had asked his intern if she wanted to come along and of course she blurted out ‘yes!’ before he could even finish his sentence. She was so excited about the trail ride and started packing immediately. This is going to be quite an experience, especially for a show rider like herself who usually sticks to riding in a fenced arena. It’s a good thing that she started gathering her things early, because she has been contemplating what to bring for over an hour now. She’s the kind of girl who pays extra for exceeding the luggage weight limit on her flights, so no wonder she’s having it tough choosing what to bring.

A little helpless she looks over at Jo, who’s waiting on her response. “I was planning on bringing this, actually,” she returns, hesitatingly. “Damn… poor horse,” the blonde cowgirl comments, eyeing all her friend’s stuff. “Too much?” Y/N assumes. “Just a tad,” Jo scoffs as she walks in. “And what the hell are you bringing the entire electronics store for?” “It’s just my charger and my hair iron. I will look like birds are nesting on my head if I don’t straighten this out,” she objects, holding out the strands of hair that have escaped her ponytail. “And you can’t have that with Dean around.” The ranch owner’s daughter crosses her arms in front of her chest, knowingly frowning at her friend. Y/N tilts her head and glares back, but fails to come up with a decent counter, because she’s not wrong. “Shut up,” she mutters instead. “By all means, pack it.” Jo shrugs as she turns back to the door. “But unless you tie a generator behind that horse of yours or find a cactus with a plug, you ain’t charging a damn thing.” “Wait. What?” Y/N responds, confused.

Jo sways around, her blonde braid hanging down from one shoulder. She narrows her eyes, trying to understand how her friend could be so oblivious to the fact that there won’t be any electricity where they are going. “What did my old man tell you exactly?” “That we might have to spend a couple of nights out camping,” Y/N recalls, trying to remember his exact words. “Have you ever been out camping, city girl?” Jo wonders, her tone indicating that she has figured it out. Now Y/N crosses her arms defensively. Just because she comes from a wealthy family, doesn’t mean that she has never been on a trip back to basics. “I have, as a matter of fact,” she returns confident. “Let me define ‘camping’,” Jo kicks off. “I’m talking ‘bout the sleeping-in-a-tent, no-shower-for-days, cooking-your-own-food-above-a-fire kind of camping. Not the kind where you park the luxurious double axle camper nice and close to the restaurant and the power station and get that satellite working as soon as possible so y’all can watch Netflix.”

Y/N opens her mouth to claim that she is not that kind of person, but has to admit her loss. She’s right, down to the double axle camper and the satellite TV. “So, no electricity? No shower?” she asks, intimidated by the matter, a trace of panic in her voice. “Nope,” Jo confirms, amused. “Better start prioritizing. Let me get my saddlebags, you can use those. Everything that doesn’t fit in there except for your sleeping bag, is not comin' along for the ride.” “Alright,” Y/N agrees reluctantly, nonetheless grateful for the help. “But how are you going to pack if I have your saddlebags?” “Simple: I’m not. I’m staying home,” the ranch owner’s daughter says. Astonished, the intern looks at her. Wait, her friend isn’t coming on this trail? The thought actually scares Y/N a little, because Jo has been there to guide her since she picked her up from the airport over a month ago. “Are you kidding me? Why?” “Someone has to run this joint while y’all are having fun. Usually, the stable crew guards the castle, but with Ash gone…”

Y/N drops her head, her mind going out to the former cattle worker. Ash left a week ago. Bobby gave him two weeks' notice but said he was free to go anytime. The loyal employee showed character and stayed as long as Bobby could afford to keep him. But after those fourteen days, Ash had no choice but to leave. Everyone was sad to see the quirky fellow go. The exchange of hugs between him and every member of his working family was moving to witness. “Dad offered to stay behind by himself, but he’s getting too old to work that hard,” Jo explains. “Garth and I will make sure everything runs smoothly here.” “What about me? How am I supposed to function without my conscience?” Y/N pouts. “You’ll be fine. You got Dean to hold your hand the entire way,” Jo mocks. The worried cowgirl chuckles. “That’s the whole problem now, isn’t it?” Jo gets up and intends to leave the room to get the saddlebags. She halts in the doorway, though, offering good advice. “Just remember: don’t do anything I wouldn’t do.” “He’s your cousin. Of course you’re not going to sleep with him,” Y/N returns smartly, pulling a laugh from the blonde cowgirl. “See my point?” she returns, winking back before she leaves the room.

Thirty minutes later, Y/N is packed and ready, but sacrifices had to be made. Obviously, the hair iron and phone charger didn’t make the final cut, but neither did her shampoo, conditioner, and moisturizer, since she won’t be able to shower anyway. Her makeup didn’t fit into the bags either. It hurts to leave it all behind and she already feels insecure about spending days with the others wearing a blank canvas of a face. Sure she isn’t as fresh at the end of a working day as she was at the start of it, but so far she has been able to keep her hair and makeup in check. Now she won’t even have a mirror to judge how tired and ordinary she looks without a brow pencil and mascara. “You’re all set.” Jo, who is on her knees on the wooden floor fighting with the saddlebag, secures the last strap, shifts her weight back on her heels and places her hands on her narrow waistline. “I owe you one. I would have never managed alone,” Y/N says, appreciating her friend’s help. “You know you can count on me.” She shrugs it off after getting up. “I’ll lend you my raincoat and my gloves too. Never sure if you’re gonna need ’em, but if the monsoon decides to throw a curveball at ya, you’ll be thanking me.” She pops out of the room again, as excited for the intern as Y/N is herself. Jo’s bubbly personality has her smiling even after she leaves. It’s funny how it feels like they have known each other for years and yet it was only a month ago that she got into the pickup truck at the airport. One month ago, this challenge started. Her dad tries to hide the surprise in his voice every time she phones him to tell him how much she is enjoying her time here. He probably expected a plea for money. That, or a one-way ticket back to luxury and easy work.

Y/N looks at one of the pictures that she nailed to the wooden wall. It portrays her family; Mom, Dad, and her three brothers surrounding Y/N at her graduation ceremony. Sure, she misses them, but she is starting to become a part of this ranch family too. That’s how it feels anyway: accepted, wanted… even loved. Her eyes hover over the picture frames and other decorations that she used to spice up her room a little. Many of the photos show Meadow, some snapped during shows, others at home in the fields. Won belt buckles and ribbons are trophies of their success together, each memory a highlight of her partnership with the special Quarter mare. Y/N remembers when she won every single one of them.

“You’re not getting homesick, are ya?” She startles, jolted awake from her daydream, and turns her head to face her handsome supervisor. Dean leans against the doorpost, and judging by the amused expression, he has been standing there for longer than a second. Dear Lord, she got so caught in recalling past victories and happy memories, that she didn’t hear him walk up to her room. The sight of him has her lost for air, even after recovering from the scare. He stands on one leg, the other bent and crossing his back foot, resting on the nose of his boot. Fringe from his worn chaps fall down over his jeans, a dark brown Stetson to match it. Dressed in a red plaid buttoned shirt and a denim jacket over it, he looks even better than he did this morning. The handsome models in the old Marlboro commercials have nothing on him. “Don’t worry. I’m not going back anytime soon,” she responds before Dean can call her out on staring. “Besides, this is beginning to feel a lot like home, too.” The wrangler glances at the wall next to the bunk bed and lets his eyes roam over the photos, ribbons and buckles. He smiles at a goofy picture of her and her three older brothers. “I like what you’ve done with the place,” he compliments. Y/N smiles at that. “Well, I am going to be staying here for a while. Might as well make it cozy.”

He grins, his green eyes catching the rays of sunlight coming through the window. Specks of gold stand out amongst the apple green, his pupils adjusting as they flick over the captured moments. They stop when he notices a photo taken during a prize-giving ceremony. He recognizes Meadow instantly, her trademark white face is hard to miss. She stands proudly with a white and blue sash hanging from her neck, event sponsors standing next to the horse, presenting the prizes won while smiling at the camera. But the person who smiles the brightest is Y/N, who sits squarely in the saddle with a wide grin on her face and sparkles in her eyes. “You won the State Championships,” he says impressed, reading the footnote. “That’s pretty damn impressive.” Y/N lights up but stays humble. “Meadow was on fire. It was the ride of my life.” “I bet it was.” Dean watches her for a second, admiring, while she reminisces over the highlight of her riding career. Then he glances at his watch briefly. “We leave at ten. You’re all packed?”

“She is now,” Jo interrupts, holding out a rolled-up sleeping bag and neatly packed raincoat. “Gloves are in the pockets.” “Thanks, Jo.” Y/N takes them and looks over her shoulder in search of her saddlebags. Dean instantly moves in to pick them up, since she has her hands full anyway. “I got it,” he states, lifting her luggage over his shoulder. “Oh, how noble of you!” Jo teases her cousin, not at all impressed with his manors. “What are you gonna do next? Buy a white horse?” Y/N snorts, but quickly straightens her mouth into a thin line to silence herself and hide the sign of amusement. Luckily, the wrangler is too busy countering her friend, as he follows the two girls into the living room. “It’s called ‘being nice’. You should try it sometime,” Dean snarls. Before the ranch owner’s daughter pushes open the front door, she looks over her shoulder. “Would you like to hold the door for her too?” she suggests, a challenging smirk on her face. “Would you like to shut your piehole?” Dean fires back after rolling his eyes.

Y/N giggles at the bickering, and opens the door herself by pushing it with her foot. If she didn’t know any better, she would think the two are siblings. Maybe not by blood, but they spent a great deal of their childhood together in the same house, at least that’s what she understood from Jo. Over the years, the youngest Singer figured out that she might not be able to beat her older cousin when it comes down to strength and speed, but verbally she stands her ground just fine. Now is no different, because Dean might have had a comeback ready, Y/N doesn’t fail to notice the color on his cheeks. He carefully glances at her from under his hat, the cowgirl smiling back reassuringly before she descends down the stairs.

At the tack up area, the Joshua tree stands tall, offering meager shade to the horses and humans underneath its branches. It’s rush hour. Benny and Garth are readying the horses, assisted by the three riders that are coming along for the trail. Dean was against bringing people along on such a long and potentially dangerous ride, but Bobby said the tourists paid good money and were experienced, so eventually, he agreed. Eight horses are tied up to the rails around the yucca tree. Six of them will be ridden, the other two will be the group’s packhorses. Y/N spots Joplin amongst them, the feisty mare that has grown on her over the past weeks. “She’s yours for the next couple of days.” Dean points her out, heading over to the dark horse with Y/N’s baggage. “Since the two of you get along so well.”

Delighted, she faces the mare, who pushes her soft nose into the folded raincoat in her arms, sniffing up the aroma. Y/N likes the little dark horse. She is not easy, has different ideas about what the pace should be, and can get very offended when her rider tells her otherwise, but there’s something about her attitude that the intern appreciates. She’s fast, tireless from the second her rider puts a foot in the stirrup, to the second he or she gets off. The Quarter is perfect for a trail like this. It didn’t cross her mind to bring Meadow for the ride. The reining horse, which is used to train on smooth arena footing, would most likely injure herself on the uneven rocky slopes and narrow paths. The hours under saddle would be much longer than regular training too, and Y/N does not want to confront her four-legged best friend with a task that she isn’t up for. Dean swings the saddlebags over Joplin’s back and straps them to the saddle. He mounts the sleeping bag and Jo’s raincoat that he takes from the intern on top, his fingers briefly brushing against hers in the transfer. The tingling sensation lingers on the surface of her skin where he touched her, causing her to be the one who is flustered now. The wrangler carefully glances over as he secures the baggage. She feels caught, but his expression is soft and comforting; he felt it too.

“Okay, y’all! We’re goin’ in five!” Benny shouts loud enough for everyone on the square to hear with his Southern accent thick on his tongue. “If you have to use the john or forgot to pack clean undies, now would be your last chance to do so.”

Last preparations are made by the crew. Benny secures his lasso to the horn of the saddle with a leather rope strap, while Dean consults his uncle one more time before departure, the two of them looking at a map of the Superstition Mountains. Then Dean folds the map and shoves it into the inside pocket of his jacket, after which he walks over to Ted Nugent, the big brown gelding that he will be riding for the upcoming days, since his favorite buckskin is out with a tendon injury ever since that rainy morning when the cattle broke out. Ellen walks up to her nephew and hands him a paper bag which, without a doubt, contains something delicious. “Made you some pecan tassies for on the road,” she says. “Wouldn’t want you to miss my baking too much.” “Thanks, Ellen.” Dean gives her a grateful nod and puts the tassies in his saddlebag. “Be careful out there, alright?” she presses, clearly worried about the quest that lies ahead for the wranglers. “Bring them back home safely.” “I’ll take care of the bunch. I promise,” he assures comfortingly, gently pulling her into his chest after which he gives his aunt a kiss on her hair.

Ellen and Dean aren’t the only ones who exchange a few last words before the group leaves. “Okay, grasshopper. This is it,” Jo’s voice sounds from behind Y/N. She spins on her heels in between the horses to meet the ranch owner’s daughter, who folds her arms around Y/N and hugs her tight. Happily, she returns the embrace before Jo pulls back and holds her by the shoulders. “Stay away from chollas if you don’t want Joplin to turn into a two-year-old who never had a saddle on her back before. And if the horses get nervous and you hear a rattle, get the hell out of Dodge, because there’s a rattlesnake within a few feet from you. Check your–-” Y/N cuts Jo off, because she has heard this before from either her or Ellen. “I know, I know. Check my boots for spiders and scorpions before I put them on and keep the tent closed,” she fills in. “Not just to keep out insects and reptiles, but horny cowboys as well,” Jo adds. Y/N snorts. “I’ll handle him. I will miss you, though.” “I’ll miss you, too, sis,” her friend returns, smiling.

They say goodbye while Dean unties his gelding and gets on swiftly, overlooking the group from the higher point of view. “Y’all ready?” he asks the company of six. When the riders cheer, he takes the reins with one hand and pulls it gently towards him, an aid for Ted to backup and move away from the other horses. The excitement rises noticeably, comparable to what one would feel when on an aircraft just before take-off and on its way to a new destination. Some of the animals start to get restless in the thrill, Joplin included. Y/N doesn’t waste any time and pulls the safety knot in order to free the mare, then puts her left foot in the stirrup and pushes herself off the ground with her right, swinging it over the back of the black horse. “Good luck, y’all,” Bobby wishes the six men and women. “See you in a couple of days!” Jo calls out.

Y/N waves at the people staying behind, a bright smile spreading from ear to ear. Looking forward to the adventure that will come next, she straightens herself in the saddle and faces the vast landscape. She might be twenty-four, but she feels more like a seven-year-old going on a field trip. In front of the rider, a pair of alert ears belonging to Joplin point forward. Beyond that view, the promontory of the Superstition Mountains stretches out. The sun has risen from behind the ridges in the East hours ago, already warming up the valley with its strong rays.

Dean watches the young woman, consumed by a different kind of scenery as his horse follows the path. In the past few weeks, she has grown more comfortable in her role as a wrangler and a ranch hand. The daily routine is starting to become her second nature and the people she works with are her friends now. He wouldn’t have guessed it at first - and he’s quite sure she herself wouldn’t have guessed it either - but she fits in perfectly. The rich girl from upstate with a master’s degree under her belt feels at home surrounded by a bunch of country folks in the dry desert lands of the south west. Who would have thought that? Dean smiles, content; something tells him that this trip will help her blossom even more.

She could almost hear a harmonica play the theme from Once Upon A Time In The West, and she’s still waiting for tumbleweed to roll across the path. Cacti reach for the sun, their arms outstretching upward, like the giants are growing actual limbs. It’s a nice variation to the evergreens that she is used to, back in Maine. The rain that came down two weeks ago has laid a blanket of green over the dry lands; it’s amazing how nature can change in a matter of days. Jo warned her about the sun, and with good reason. Over the last month, the intern slowly but surely got used to the extreme weather circumstances that Arizona offers, but she has never been on a horse during the hottest hours of the day. It might already be late September, but the heat is blistering. She could use a shower right about now, and just the thought of not being able to take one for the next couple of days grosses her out. The temperatures weigh on the female rider, more than she thought it would, but her partner Joplin doesn’t seem to mind much. Her neck and shoulders are sweaty, but she still dribbles impatiently every now and then, eager to cover more ground.

Dean leads the group, guiding them from spring to spring. The group left the Hieroglyphic Trail about three hours ago, which ended at a small creek and a poor excuse for a waterfall. They took a break there and had a few of Ellen’s delicious pecan tassies while the horses drank. Now, they are well on their way to Willow Spring, but the trail isn’t getting any easier. As they conquer the steep slopes, the pace slows down. Y/N is amazed at how the horses are able to maneuver on the rough terrain, which consists of loose pebbles, slippery boulders, and cracked volcanic rock. One misstep could severely injure the large animals, but they seem to be aware of that. Joplin proceeds agile and fearless, almost like a bobcat, and her rider learns quickly to let her take care of the drops and jumps. She doesn’t need guidance, the mare knows the way. All Y/N has to do is sit tight and move along with her to maintain the balance.

“How y’all doing back there?” Dean is looking over his shoulder, his free hand resting on the cantle of the saddle. “We’re good!” one of the tourists assures. His name is Brad, the young guy riding next to his sister Macy and their buddy Jonathan. The head wrangler chatted a little bit with the three members of the group and they turn out to be good company. The trio is traveling across the country, enjoying a gap year from college. With Brad and Macy’s father being a rancher in Colorado, they know their way around horses. Jonathan is a little less experienced in the saddle, but he’s managing just fine. No doubt about it, though, that he’s going to be left with a serious muscle ache in the coming days. The leader of the pack shifts his eyes from them to his intern, asking her the same question silently. She nods, smiling reassuringly at her handsome supervisor, telling him in the same language that she’s doing fine. Content, Dean smiles back and winks at her before he straightens himself. It’s a good thing he’s not facing her anymore, because Y/N is sure that about a hundred butterflies hatched from their cocoons in her stomach, the feeling triggering her to take a shuddering breath. She huffs, annoyed with the response he triggered. Just look at him. He’s infuriatinglygorgeous, looking way too good on his horse, in those darn chaps, wearing that darn western hat. A part of her wants to dislike him, just for being so distracting. But she can’t be mad at him, not really. Just a glance her way with that grin and she’s a complete goner. Y/N watches as the cowboy catches up with Benny, slowing his horse down when they are side by side.

“Tell me, Chief, how are things between you and the intern goin’?” the Southerner wonders, making sure the woman in question is unable to pick up on the conversation. Dean looks aside at his best friend, amused by his curiosity. “It’s not going anywhere, really. Things are good as they are,” he claims. “Oh, c’mon, now. Did she turn you down again?” Benny guesses. Dean eyes him. “She didn’t turn me down. I just didn’t make my move.” The wrangler next to him seems to need a second to process the information. Dean Winchester didn’t make a move on a girl he likes in 0.2 seconds? That’s a new one. “Wait a minute. So you two haven’t even…?” “We’re just friends, Benny,” Dean claims, aware how terribly unconvincing it sounds the moment he pronounces the words. “Horse shit. You didn’t pass up Casey to be ‘just friends’ with the gal. You called dibs,” he reminds the head wrangler. “Besides, I see the way you look at her. You don’t look at a pal like that.”

Dean shakes his head, remembering the arrangement well. It’s not like he can deny he made that deal with the farrier, despite that it felt wrong to do so. But back then when he claimed her in order to keep his notorious friend away, he was still clueless about the affection he felt for her. The affection that steadily grew stronger to the point where he cares more about what’s best for the free young woman than what he wants for himself. “So what, Benny?” He shrugs, hoping his friend would let it go. “So what? I know it’s a little dusty here in the desert, but did you get sand in your eyes?” Benny returns, perplexed. “Look, I know she’s awesome, and yes, I wouldn’t mind hooking up with her, but I can’t, okay?” Dean claims. Unable to understand the math behind his choice, the broad-shouldered ranch hand throws him a look that somewhere between dirty and confused. “Why not?” “Well for starters, Bobby will kill me if he finds out, since he took me aside to specifically forbid me to pull anything. Secondly, she’ll only stay for six months--” Benny interrupts him, however. “Invalid, Chief. Bobby told you before to quit bouncing around with clients and staff and it never stopped you then. And since when is six months too short for you? You usually get bored with your lady friends after a--” The cowboy from the South stops mid-sentence and Dean can almost hear it click in his mind. Oh, boy. Benny has figured it out. Even though he tried to make up excuses in order to avoid being confronted by his best bud, there’s no way of dodging that bullet now. “Well, fuck a goat and call her Nancy! You’re in love with her,” Benny announces, shocked. Dean raises his eyebrows at the rider next to him, then scoffs and looks away, trying to act like the very idea is ridiculous. “That’s - that’s just… Y-you’re insane,” he stutters, unable to flat out deny it. Benny starts to laugh out loud, apparently very much amused with his discovery. “I can’t believe you walked straight into that love trap!” “Would you keep your voice down?” the rider next to him hushes. The farrier looks over the back of his horse at the intern, but she’s about thirty yards behind them talking to Macy, clueless what the two wranglers leading the group are discussing. Dean stays quiet for a few long seconds, trying to decide if he is ready to admit that she means so much to him. “She’s a nice girl, Benny. I don’t wanna hurt her,” he claims. “Oh, c’mon now! You’re seriously telling me you grew a conscience all of a sudden? You used to love ‘em and leave ‘em without a second thought.” Benny has crossed his wrists over the horn of his saddle, the reins loosely between his fingers, as he looks aside to catch anything that would indicate what’s going on in his best mate’s head. It’s clear that he’s astonished by the shift in his demeanor. “I’m gonna ignore the urge to ask you who you are and where my friend is,” the Southerner chuckles. “But is it really just her heart you’re scared to break?” Dean ponders, trying to make sense of the odds and ends that scatter his thoughts. Benny is not entirely wrong. It terrifies the wrangler to give in to these emotions. Is that maybe the true reason why he didn’t kiss Y/N that night under the Joshua tree? Or when she came looking for him after he had that argument with Ash? Maybe it’s a bit of both. “How long have we known each other? Fourteen, fifteen years now?” Dean recalls. “Give or take,” Benny confirms, looking down at the trail as he moves his hand over the mane of his horse in order to steer it a little wider around a boulder. “Do I seem like the kinda guy who does that? Fall for a girl? I liked the way things were, no attachments and all that,” the head wrangler continues, confused. “That’s the thing about falling in love, Chief. It happens to the best of us and always at a time when you least expect it. It hits you like lightning and you’re toast before you even got a clue why you’re feelin’ so crispy,” Benny says wisely.

The head wrangler glances at his companion sideways, reading into his words. It almost sounds like the Southerner knows what he’s talking about. “You’ve been there,” he realizes. “Oh, I’ve been there. I’ve been beyond falling in love, I loved her with my whole damn heart,” Benny acknowledges, smiling at the memory. “Her name was Andrea. We were both eighteen. She spent the summer with relatives in Louisiana and I was a lost cause from the moment I laid eyes on her. A Greek Goddess, and I ain’t exaggeratin’. She was pretty as a peach! Kind, funny as hell, too.” “Since she’s ain’t here, I reckon it didn’t end well?” Dean assumes again. “It didn’t; she went back to Greece and I moved here because everything reminded me of her at home,” his friend tells him. “You know you just proved my point, right?” the head wrangler says, a hint of triumph in his voice trying to mask the sadness in his eyes. “If love always comes to bite you in the ass, why even bother?” “‘Cause the heartache ain’t the clue, brother. What I had with Andrea was so good, so pure, I wouldn’t have missed it for the world. Even if I knew what I know now, how it would end, I would take that plunge again without a doubt in my mind.” Dean huffs, unable to believe that. “Despite that she left you?” “Fuck, yeah,” Benny states. “Better to love and to lose, than to not have loved at all.”

Dean is quiet now. The path narrows and he holds Ted back a little, merging behind Benny’s horse. As he lets his friend’s words sink in, he glances down the slope at the intern again. She’s several yards down the steep hill, focused on Joplin as she rides her up the trail. Her braided hair already has strands peeking out from under her hat, and he is sure if she had a mirror she would fix the mess, but he loves it. He loves it when the wind rustles her locks, or when the desert dust smudges her skin. Once again that feeling overcomes him, the feeling of a lantern being lit in the pit of his stomach, warming his body as it slowly rises through his core to his chest, where the heat lingers. It feels so good, but there’s a catch to the sensation. It comes with the emotion that creeps up on him when he lays awake at night thinking about Y/N; fear. The fear of her leaving him after her internship. The fear of her reaction if he would let her witness the scar tissue that lays thick on his soul. The fear that this love will consume him, just like the love for Mom consumed his father. The fear of failing her. But now that the true meaning of Benny’s message dawns on him, another kind surfaces. It’s a thought that he hasn’t had before, and as it pops into his head, the question reverberates louder through his mind than all the others. What if he misses his chance? What if there are only so many opportunities to win her over?

He straightens himself before she looks ahead and spots him staring, and he closes his eyes and tips his hat forward. Shit, you’ve been so worried about losing her that you forgot that in order to lose her, you have to have her first, he thinks to himself. A sigh slips from his dry mouth, reminding him how thirsty he is. He reaches for his water bottle from his saddlebag, pulls out the cap with his teeth and gulps down the water, knocking his head back as he takes a few swigs. Nope, he’s not dehydrated. In fact, he’s still having these contradicting thoughts. When he slips the bottle back where he took it from, his eyes wander down the path again, this time looking straight into hers. As he tries to decide on his next move, he holds her gaze as she smiles up at him. Dean wasted two shots already; what if it’s three strikes, you’re out? If he fucks this up, at least he tried, but if he won’t give this a try at all, he’ll beat himself up over it for the rest of his life. Either way, failure seems to be inevitable.

Then he remembers something. Something that he was taught at a very young age. He had just turned four when he took a fall off the neighbor’s Shetland pony. It was the first time he had rode alone without his mom holding the miniature horse and the naughty pony took advantage of that situation. The Shetland picked up speed and bucked once, sending him straight into the dirt. After making sure that her son was okay, he recalls his mom picking him up. “You wanna give it another go?” she asked. “No…” he said. “So that’s it? You never wanna ride again?” she questioned again, her voice gentle. Now he was quiet, not sure how to answer that. “I don’t wanna fall off,” he mumbled eventually, looking down at the ground. “Falling is a part of riding, sweety. It’s a part of life. It’s okay to fall,” she told him. “But it hurts,” he said, rubbing his scraped elbow. “And it’s scary.” “Yeah, sometimes falling can be very scary,” Mom acknowledged. “But you won’t get any better if you stop trying. You have to face what you’re scared of, to grow. You know what they say about falling?” He shook his little head, waiting for the elaboration patiently. “You have to fall off seven times before you'll become a good rider,” she says. “Seven?!” he repeats, eyes wide. “Seven,” Mom pointed out. “But you know how he becomes a great horseman?” Dean shook his head again and listened eagerly. All that he wanted was to become a horseman, so this was the time to pay attention. “A good rider becomes a great horseman when he falls seven times and gets up eight.”

The wise words always stuck with Dean as he grew older. He remembers when he was twelve and got back to his feet after his seventh crash landing, this time from a young bronc. He was a horseman now, because he got up beaming, and brushed the dirt from his jeans. Every time when life beat him down, he did the same. Sadly, Mom wasn’t there to see her son become a horseman. She was long gone by the time he reached that age, but her life lessons will never be forgotten. Life is filled with setbacks. No one walks this journey without encountering them. For some that one setback is enough reason to give up and never become good at anything, for others, it’s a way to push through. And yes, getting up and trying again is not easy. But Mom taught him to look fear in the eye and get back in the saddle anyway, because quitting will definitely not get him anywhere. Whenever he hit the ground, literally or metaphorically, he would think of that memory. Now is no different. Mom was right; he has to face what scares him in order to grow.

Dean slows down his horse, pulling the bit just enough to stop Ted, giving the horse behind him a chance to catch up. When Joplin comes alongside, he glances at the rider from under his Stetson. “Hello, Cowboy,” she greets, a small but delighted smile on her lips. Dean chuckles at that, his eyes not leaving hers. “Hey, beautiful,” he returns. The compliment brightens her eyes even more and heats up her cheeks. The trail barely allows the two of them to ride side by side, their stirrups touching occasionally. He aches for her knee to brush his like he would crave rain after a long desert ride. When the denim of her jeans does rub against him, it leaves him electrified. And then he realizes that Benny is right, too. It is better to love and to lose, than to not have loved at all.

Thank you for reading! I appreciate every single one of you, but if you do want to give me some extra love, you are free to reblog my work or buy me coffee (Link in bio at the top of the page)

Read part eleven here

#Ride With Me #Dean x Reader #Cowboy!Dean #Dean Winchester #Dean Winchester series #Dean Winchester AU #Cowboy!Dean x Reader #Supernatural #SPN #Supernatural AU #spn au fanfiction #Dean x Y/N #Dean reader insert #Dean Winchester reader insert #Dean Winchester fanfic #Dean Winchester fanfiction #Dean angst #Dean fluff #Kate Huntington

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splashmouseold · 3 years

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i visited my parents yesterday sooo I didn’t really get much time for media until late night i crammed some things

titles i played today yesterday

Mario & Luigi Dream Team

Entered the north path of Somnoms Temple Puzzle, and the bros took the elevator to the top and fought Pi'illodium. Most. Difficult. Opponent. Yet. The first time playing this game that I almost Game Over'd. But did pull through and beat Pi'illodium on my first try. Though I still don't understand how to dodge their lazer attack, the blasts seemed to not match the indicators when they charged up, AND, it was A LOT to memorize. That and it took me halfway through the fight to figure out how to counter their hammer attack.

Puyo Puyo Tetris

I was dissapoint in myself, am I rusty or not as good as I thought? I got 2 stars on Stage 1.2 - clear 10 lines under 3minutes (2 stars means I cleared it under 1:30). Also, before I played stage 1.2.. I want to talk about stage 1.1... and its relation or lack of with Options Theme choices, and how it royally confused me. Stage 1.1 clearly takes place on the spaceship, yet when you get to playing it, you’re outside the school. It doesn’t make sense, that’s when I learned in Options you can choose your stage theme.. so I selected Cockpit 1, thinking that might be the appropriate spaceship room, yet it still played outside the school. That’s when I realized, OH, Options theme selections DO NOT APPLY TO STORY MODE. Meaning the coders just went and effed up on stage 1.1. Luckily, stage 1.2 played appropriately.

Luigi’s Mansion: Dark Moon

I attempted to catch a new theme ghost in scarescraper. I like to put it to surprise floors, to reduce repetitiveness and keep me entertained. Frankly, I have particular trouble with escape floors. They tend to be my foil, I just don’t get what the trick is to win. I find myself scrambling for clocks with no avail; I open a desk, or suck the grass, or zap the light operated boxes.. and.. no clocks.

Super Smash Bros. for 3DS

I continued to play with Pac-Man in Smash Mode, on my quest to have him beat every fighter at Lv.3, as I carefully and studiously learn Pac-Man’s moveset and how it interacts with his surroundings. I played through in order of the roster to beating Pikachu, then came Wario as a challenger approaching.. and he kicked my butt, so I stopped there for the day. Let’s see if I can remember what I learned of Pac-Man’s moveset off the top of my head.. Regular attack: Punch, punch, kick. Side tilt: Push kick Up tilt: Headbutt Down tilt: Retro bite Side smash: hold ghost to side Up smash: hold ghost up Down smash: hold two ghosts, one on each side Air regular: Retro spinning bite. Air side & Air up: i forget Air down: downwards multi kick, with an ending downwards ping kick. Dash attack: Retro dash bite Special regular: Throw retro item. Special side: makes a path of dots to retro dash bite Special down: fire hydrant Special up: trampoline I haven’t learned his throws yet.

One Piece: Bon! Bon! Journey!

Cute game, and as a critic fan of OP, I’m giving it a try. I take one issue with it so far, it only gives you two options of an account- Facebook or Guest. I abbsoolutely do not like using my real name for online gaming so I went with Guest. It might be that I’m still in the tutorial as I only do a stage per sitting, that it won’t let me change my name from Guest to something unique.. or it might be that ruthless to pushing people to use facebook login.. idk yet. Anyway, as for a One Piece bon bon crossover, I dig it. Why? It potentially removes the one major issue I have with the manga/anime, the blatant sexism of body image double standards. HAh! Y’all just chibi faces now.

Streetlight Manifesto - Point / Counterpoint

I was really out of it when I listened to this, plus it’s super fast paced, I mean like, the singer sings faster than I can read.. and I’m a fairly quick reader. My apologies I do not remember what this song is about. But it sounds amazing, and i do recommend it

#titles i played today #diary #gaming #mario #puyo puyo #tetris #super smash bros #one piece #bon bon #listening #streetlight manifesto

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writingthrones · 5 years

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the northern dragon- part 4.

PART 4: ADMISSION.

TAGS: @psychosupernatural , @xleviiiix , @ashtronomyyyy , @starkbelova ,@5aftermidnight , @makapaka11 , @mxxkscreate-write , @scorpiosmalfoy ,@harrison-shot-first , @art-flirt , @jessyballet , @vaexvictis , @callmeconceited (feel free to shoot me a message if you’d also like to be tagged!)

DESCRIPTION: the world thought that just 2 dragons survived, that house targaryen was missing its third head. but there was another– the youngest, the final child of the mad king and queen rhaella. of course, she was almost part of the near extermination of her house. but the honorable ned stark, unable to watch a babe be murdered for crimes she did not commit, rescued her from an awful fate. instead, she grew up amongst wolves within the walls of winterfell.

NOTES: there’s not a lot of dialogue in this part but it’s a lot of development for the reader. i know y’all have been wanting robb x reader to be more of a thing, so i tried to give at least a taste of that. anyways, feedback is very much appreciated! i’m already working on the next part, so i’d love to hear your thoughts as it may help me to write it!

WARNINGS: here comes the battle of oxcross so lots of violence.

Holding your head high, you stepped foot into Robb’s tent, finding it empty save for just the two of you. “You wanted to see me, Your Grace?” It felt odd to say it and you didn’t really want to, but you didn’t want to cause any blatant disrespect. When he turns to face you, it is quickly noticed that his eyes are bloodshot with dark circles underneath. He definitely hadn’t slept. With a wave of his hand, he motions you over. Walking up besides him, you lean onto the table where has battle plans are laid out. It’s confusing, did he mean to consult you on strategy? You were a fighter, sure, but that doesn’t mean you knew anything like this. Turning to him with your brow furrowed, you were just about to speak when he did instead.

“My mother has gone to secure an alliance with Renly Baratheon. And Theon went to meet with his father, he says that he can convince him to support us..” he sighs, not sounding so convinced. Another pause, a sigh and he speaks again. “I intend to march on Oxcross. It’s a Lannister stronghold and we need to push them out of the Riverlands. Then on to the Westerlands.” You’re still confused as to why he’s telling you this which is very evident on your features. There’s a pause before he reluctantly states, “I want you out there.” Indigo eyes were wide with shock, “What?!” He nodded before continuing on, “I... I know that you are more than capable. The plan is to take them by surprise in the night so it should be an easy victory.” You were completely astonished, you had thought that the only way you’d get into battle is if you snuck in but now here he was, the King in the North, asking you to fight. “You’ll ride next to me.” It seems that there’s more he wants to say but he leaves it at that. “I had one of the men prepare some armor for you, and a sword. I plan to attack tonight so be ready.” You nodded with a smile on your face. He was finally working with you. “Thank you,” you said softly before taking your leave.

Shortly after, the encampment was picking up and moving along. They needed to make sure that they covered enough ground that day to get close-- but not too close-- to Oxcross. Per his order, you rode alongside Robb and his advisors. Your heart was racing but you kept a stoic expression. No form of weakness could be shown in front of the men, as they were already questioning why you were here and why you, seemingly a nobody, got to ride alongside the King.

When you finally set up camp again, you began to really feel the nerves. This was a chance to prove yourself, to show that you deserved to be on the front lines. You were never meant to be a woman who sits aside quietly and simply performs her “womanly duties” or whatever it was that was expected of someone like her. Your mother must’ve known what she was doing when she named you-- Visenya was no ordinary Queen, no, she was a Conqueror and Warrior. You would be one too.

The sun was setting and you began to suit up. Steadying your breathing, you carefully put on each piece of the set. Someone then entered your tent, causing you to spin around quickly, armor only half way done. It was Robb. “How does it fit?” he asked. “Well so far, it seems to be just fine,” you replied with a nervous chuckle. All that was given in return was a smirk. There was still your breastplate, gorget and pauldrons to apply. “Need some help?” he questioned, eyeing the pieces that still lie on your bed. You nodded and he began by picking up the breastplate, placing it on the front of your torso, then moving behind to pull the straps tight. It caused you to suck in a quick breath, shocked by just how tight it was. Hearing this, he chuckled. “And this,” he said, picking up the gorget and placing it around your neck, fastening it in place, “goes here.” Finally, there was the pauldrons, which was nothing too difficult and the two of your worked together.

“Thank you,” you said softly, looking up at him with a smile. Looking down on yourself, the armor looked just like his. “Of course,” he replied with a nod. "It’s time,” he added, marching out quickly. Quickly grabbing your helmet and placing it on your head, you ran out of the tent with your sword. You followed after Robb, mounting the horse just beside him. He looked to you for just a moment and you made a point to really look at him. The beard that truly did make him look like a man, his piercing, deep set eyes and those curls... he had assured you that this would be an easy win but nothing was certain. You wanted to make sure you would remember him.

Emerging from the woods, the Northern army began to easily slaughter the Lannister forces. They had no time to get up and fight. You had already managed to cut down two men as you rode by. Your confidence was growing when you were suddenly thrown off your horse. It was unclear whether the animal had simply been spooked or if it had gotten attacked. Either way, you fell flat on your back, knocking all of the air out of your lungs. There was black spots in your vision and you feared losing consciousness. Sucking in a deep breath burned, but you had to do it or you would pass out and surely be killed. Using all of your strength, you forced yourself up onto your feet, wobbling slightly. The panic set in when your realized you’d lost your sword in the fall. Head moving quickly side to side, you reached down to grab the first one you found. It wasn’t yours, that much you knew, but it would have to do. Just then, a Lannister soldier came charging at you and, acting on impulse, you placed your boot on his chest and kicked him back as hard as you could, letting out a grunt as you did so. He fell back, just as you had and you walked up to finish the job. But what you saw made your hands begin to shake. The boy that laid there was surely younger than you were, his eyes wide with pure terror. This was no ordinary soldier but a boy forced into a conflict he probably knew very little of. It was war, you told yourself. He said nothing but his eyes were pleading. You couldn’t finish the job, choosing to run off into the thick of the fighting.

When morning came, the fighting had ended. It was an obvious win for the North, just as predicted. You sat there in the field, helmet placed beside, dirt and blood all over your face. Groans could be heard all around coming from men on both sides of the conflict. The silent sisters did their work and you just watched. One had approached you but you shook your head, insisting that there were no serious wounds. They had more important matters to tend to. Finally, you had the strength to push yourself up and search for Robb. It was obvious that he was still alive or things would not be as relatively calm as they were.

When you finally did spot him, he was assisting in an amputation of a Lannister soldier. The young man’s foot needed to be removed and so Robb aided a dark-haired medic woman by holding him down. All the while, it seemed as though they were having an engaging conversation. Safe to say, your curiosity was peaked. Who was this woman and why was Robb talking with her rather than meeting with his advisors to discuss what would come next? Or maybe that had already been done.. it made you wonder just how long you had waited to move from your spot on the battlefield. You wanted to find out exactly how their forces fared, so you began to walk towards him while wiping the blood off your face.

“Robb-- Your Grace, I mean,” you said, not exactly intending to intrude on their conversation but you wanted to speak to him now. He turned his head to look at you, his eyes widening. “Thank the gods you’re okay,” he simply says, just a hint of a smile pulling at his lips. “Yeah, you too,” you replied, unafraid to smile back. “This is Lady Talisa,” he quickly says as he looks over at the medic woman beside him. You offer the woman a soft smile and she does the same in return. “And this is Y/N,” he adds, eyes still on her for a moment longer before nodding his head to you. “It is nice to meet you, my Lady,” you say softly to which she replies, “And you, Y/N.” “So how exactly have we fared?” you then asked Robb, head tilted slightly with curiosity. “We lost some good men,” he sighs. “But they lost far more.” There’s a look on the young woman’s face you can’t quite decipher, but it certainly isn’t too pleased. “I will see you back in the camp,” he says. It isn’t hard to tell that it’s his way of saying leave. All you could do is nod and walk away, leaving them to finish their conversation.

You arranged for a bath for yourself late at night when you were sure that most would be asleep. It meant you could cleanse yourself of all that had happened without fear of someone walking in. You watched the steam rise off the scalding hot water as you undressed, head wrap and all. There was a dull mirror in the corner of the tent and you stood to admire yourself in it for a moment. Jaime Lannister’s words began to replay in your head. You’re actually quite pretty, do you know that? Your head tilted as you studied your own frame. He was right, wasn’t he? It’s a shame they keep you all covered up like an old hag. Your hands then went to your hair, running your fingers through the silver locks. It was beautiful and yet no one would ever see it, only you. Swallowing the lump in your throat, you got into the bath, intending to enjoy the hot water while it lasted. The heat felt wonderful as you held your breath and submerged yourself. All the blood and dirt was gone and it was like you had been transformed. When you went back up for air, you looked like a true Targaryen princess-- indigo eyes that truly popped against pale skin and long, flowing, silver hair.

The water eventually ran cold and when you stepped out, the steam rolled off your skin. Your body had been built for the heat but still you managed to grow, even in the freezing North. Sighing, you wrapped yourself in a robe and began to dry off. It was important to make sure that your hair was dry, as wrapping it up wet would cause some problems. Completing the dreary process, you collapsed into the furs and fell asleep.

Like always, the whole encampment was up bright and early. You almost regretted staying up so late just for a hot bath. That simple moment, though, had meant a lot for you. One would never think that something like that could hold any kind of meaning, really. But it made you remember who you are, remember that you are a dragon no matter what mask you must put on for survival. And for a moment there was a hope that one day, somehow, you’d be able to be truly yourself.. but you didn’t allow yourself to hope for long. There was no point when it would only lead to disappointment and hurt.

Exiting your tent and stepping out into the morning light, you took a deep breath and wondered what the day would bring. You hadn’t seen Robb last night, so you had no idea what his next move was. After thinking it over, you decided to set out in search for him. The first guess was, naturally, his tent but as far as you could tell he wasn’t there. There was just no way you would be getting into the king’s quarters, but you didn’t hear anything going on in there so you moved along. After making your way all around the encampment, you found him and in a position you wouldn’t have expected.

There he was, the King in the North, walking along in thoughtful conversation with a medic. Didn’t he have a million other things to be doing? Your mind raced. You hated the way that you cared and the way that this upset you. It wasn’t just about the importance of focusing on this war and all it meant. It certainly wasn’t about the fact that he was a king and she was seemingly a random woman. This was about something you didn’t want to ever admit, not even to yourself. You loved Robb Stark. You didn’t want to, but you did. It had been that way since you were children. Seven hells, before you could even understand the concept of romantic love, you knew that Robb was different. Jon was your brother but Robb.. he was something else entirely.

Of course, none of that mattered. In fact, you cursed yourself for being upset. Robb had always been an honorable man, he was capable of carrying an engaging conversation with a woman without desiring her. Even then, he was betrothed to a Frey girl and however unsavory that deal was, he would have to honor it. The deal had been crucial in their advancement and there would surely be consequences should he decide to break it off. There was no reason to get so worked up, you thought to yourself but watching the way he laughed and smiled when she spoke, it made your heart ache.

Sucking in a deep breath, you turned around quickly and moved back into the camp to find something to distract yourself. It felt as though it had been years since you truly thought about your feelings for Robb. You had hoped that it would fade away, that it was nothing more than a childhood crush. But as the years went by and you both got older, the feelings never faded-- no, in fact, they only grew into something more. From time to time you wondered if you two could’ve been betrothed to each other had your house not been eliminated. Sometimes you even fooled yourself into believing such a thing but, of course, you knew that it still wouldn’t have been possible. The Warden of the North would never agree to a match between his heir and a descendant of the people who took his home’s independence. It seemed that fate had made it pretty clear that the two of you were never meant to be.

#game of thrones imagine #robb stark imagine #targaryen!reader #robb stark x reader #game of thrones x reader

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makeste · 5 years

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a BnHA playlist/fanmix thing

@psqqa so I finally put together a list of some of my BnHA playlist tracks! this is by no means comprehensive because I have literally half a dozen different playlists with different themes (e.g. “instrumentals”, “BakuDeku”, “songs that either remind me of Kacchan or that he would work out to”, “angsty apocalyptic final battle”, and so forth) and omg it’s a lot. but this is my most inclusive playlist, which consists of general character theme songs for most of class 1-A, the League of Villains, and a few others. my taste in music generally leans towards alternative/indie/rock/grunge, but it can kind of go all over the place. so the genres may vary here and there, especially since I opted to go with whichever song I felt fit the character best regardless of how well the tracks all blended together musically.

also I have a bakudeku bias but THAT’S NOT EXACTLY BREAKING NEWS what can I say. and this is actually me holding back lol but oh well.

Deku - Rise (Katy Perry) - “makeste did you really just kick off your BnHA playlist with a Katy Perry song” yeah I did! because!! I won’t just survive/oh you will see me thrive/can’t write my story/I’m beyond the archetype. like, this song was made for anime protagonists. oh ye of little faith/don’t doubt it, don’t doubt it/victory is in my veins/I know it, I know it. this kid just doesn’t give up. this is no mistake, no accident/when you think the final nail is in, think again/don’t be surprised/I will still rise.

bonus: Blood (Archis) - this song is fucking gorgeous both musically and lyrically. don’t let them win/don’t let them get/under your skin, into your head/they’re full of it/you’re full of life/you’ll prove them right if you’re giving up/so let’s go for blood. it really is fucked up how dismissive BnHA society is of anyone who’s quirkless. it’s so stupid too, because the majority of quirks aren’t even all that great. “look at me I can make DSLR lenses pop out of my body!” lol fucking great. so obviously superior to normal people who have to take pictures with actual cameras like fucking scrubs. anyway, so Deku was written off from a young age as helpless, defective, and deficient, all because he lacked a quirk. so it’s been so fucking great to watch him finally prove them all wrong. (...by getting a quirk. lol. but STILL.) well it sure took a while to turn it around/but I never gave up on me.

Bakugou - We Will Rock You (VonLichten mix) (Queen) - I like this version of the song because it adds a bit of an extra oomph and it’s a little bit fiercer. anyways, this has been my Bakugou theme song since day one, and what I love about it is that each verse works for a different stage of his ~journey~. buddy you’re a boy/make a big noise/playing in the street/gonna be a big man someday -- this is Katsuki as a fearless young child, with hints at the growing chip on his shoulder (kicking your can all over the place). and then the second verse is him a little older, starting out at UA -- buddy you’re a young man/hard man/shouting in the street/gonna take on the world someday -- and proclaiming to the world that he’ll be number one. and lastly we have the final verse, with its line gonna make you some peace someday, which I know is meant in a make-peace-with-things-before-the-end kind of way, but in a BnHA context you can totally tweak it to be a reference to the man he’s aspiring to be. gonna make you some peace, because he’s gonna be greater than the Symbol of Peace himself someday.

bonus: Defy You (The Offspring) - the wind blows/I’ll lean into the wind/my anger grows/I’ll use it to win/the more you say/the more I defy you/so get out of my way. perfect song for a boy who cannot and will not be stopped. you cannot stop us/you cannot bring us down/never give up/we’ll go on and on. or, in his words: “I will win... that’s what heroes do.”

All Might - Legends Never Die (League of Legends OST) - listen I have never played League of Legends lol, but ever since I heard this song in a Marvel edit, this has been the All Might song for me. you could probably just watch the Kamino battle on mute with this song in the background and everything would fit. legends never die/when the world is calling you/can you hear them screaming out your name?/legends never die/they become a part of you/every time you bleed for reaching greatness/relentless, you survive. the lyrics basically speak for themselves. we stan a champion.

Aizawa - I’ll Make a Man Out of You (Mulan OST) - y’all I went through so many songs looking for something that summarized Aizawa’s tiredness/doneness-with-life while also alluding to his mentor side, and then suddenly BAM, it hit me. anyways so yeah. you’re the saddest bunch I ever met/but you can bet before we’re through/mister I’ll make a man out of you. also just try to listen to the “say goodbye to those who knew me/boy was I a fool in school for cutting gym/THIS GUY’S GOT ‘EM SCARED TO DEATH” part without picturing 1-A bitching about their scruffy teacher overlord whom they secretly love.

bonus: I’m So Tired (Fugazi) - if you’re looking for something more musically cohesive with the rest of this playlist in general, as opposed to SUDDEN DISNEY SONG OUT OF NOWHERE, this may be a bit more up your alley lol. I’m so tired sheep are counting me/no more struggle, no more energy/no more patience/and you can write that down/it’s all too crazy and I’m not sticking round. anyways Aizawa needs a nap.

Todoroki - Alive (Sia) - I grew up overnight/I played alone, I played on my own/I survived/I wanted everything I never had/like the love that comes with life/I wore envy and I hated it/but I survived. guys this little candy cane boy has been through some shit. but he hung in there and now he is thriving. I’m still breathing/I’m alive.

Ochako - You Gotta Be (Des’ree) - because she’s a badass. you gotta be bad, you gotta be bold, you gotta be wiser/you gotta be hard, you gotta be tough, you gotta be stronger/you gotta be cool, you gotta be calm, you gotta stay together. anyways I sure would like Ochako to get the spotlight in an arc again one of these days. she’s the best.

Iida - Never Die (FNDTY) - it was actually pretty hard to find a song that fit Iida’s unique forty-year-old man personality since my musical tastes usually run towards moody shit and he’s pretty much the opposite of that lol. but I think the tempo of this song fits his quirk, at least, and it makes me smile, which he does also. you can run/you can fly/you can never die.

Kirishima - Guts Over Fear ft. Sia (Eminem) - so this is a song all about overcoming your insecurities and finding the courage within yourself. I freaking love how the pre-chorus I was afraid to make a single sound/afraid I would never find a way out builds up and transitions into so here I am and I will not run/guts over fear. I’m so proud of Kiri you guys.

Momo - You Are Young (Keane) - another song about getting the better of your personal doubts and demons! hey now, don’t be scared, baby, don’t be scared at all/of all the things you don’t know/you’ve got time to realize. Momo has so much potential and she’s going to be such an incredible hero one day. now that she’s gaining more confidence the sky is pretty much the limit for her. you’ve got time/you’ve got to try/to bring some good into this world/cause you are young.

Mina - Safe and Sound (Capital Cities) - oh hey it’s the most upbeat song in the world, for the world’s most cheerful and optimistic and endlessly delightful person. I could fill your cup/you know my river won’t evaporate/this world we still appreciate/you could be my luck/even in a hurricane of frowns/I know that we’ll be safe and sound.

Kaminari - Thunderstruck (AC/DC) - okay yeah maybe I didn’t try too hard on this one lol. BUT IF THE SHOE FITS and honestly, it does. title aside, I think this song fits Kaminari musically too. it’s badass and it puts a smile on your face. went through to Texas/yeah Texas/and we had some fun/we met some girls/some dancers who gave a good time/broke all the rules/played all the fools. and then, of course, the chorus. you’ve been thunderstruck.

Jirou - Dream On (Aerosmith) - you know I had to go with a rock song for Jirou, so might as well go with a classic that’s all about (a) loving music (sing with me, sing for the year/sing for the laughter, sing for the tear) and (b) shooting for your dreams. dream on, dream on/dream until your dreams come true.

Tokoyami - Dark Necessities (Red Hot Chili Peppers) - I could have possibly gone with something a bit more goth for Toko as opposed to the Chilis, but the lyrics just fit so well though. you don’t know my mind/you don’t know my kind/dark necessities are part of my design/tell the world that I’m falling from the sky/dark necessities are part of my design/do you want this love of mine?/darkness helps us all to shine. Tokoyami doesn’t get enough respect for being a teenage edgelord without being a cringey mess. he’s setting such a good example for others.

so that’s pretty much it for my 1-A songs, but here are some bonus BakuDeku songs because I am obsessed

Muddy Waters (LP) - this is my theme for Deku VS Kacchan 2. goddamn Katsuki is such a hot fucking mess during this fight. and he’s hurting so much, and he’s reaching out to the only person he knows to reach out to in the only way he knows how. I will ask you for mercy/I will come to you blind/what you’ll see is the worst me/I’m not the last of my kind/in the muddy water we’re falling/in the muddy water we’re crawling. this song brings that good angst you guys. this is a relationship that has been through the wringer, and two boys who have basically no idea what they are doing, just kind of stumbling along. it is not clear why we choose the fire pathway/where we end is not the way that we had planned/all the spirits gathered round like it’s our last day/to get across you know we’ll have to raise the sand. anyways these kids chose the highest possible difficulty level for their path forward, but they’re doing it though. together, y’all.

Admiration (Incubus) - because Izuku is frankly infatuated and doesn’t even try to hide it. you’re an unfenced fire/over walls we’ve trampled/it’s you I admire/my living example. “an amazing person who was even closer to me than All Might.” he’s so open in his respect and awe for practically everything Kacchan does. just staring at him in starry-eyed wonder. and this part of their dynamic has always been so compelling to me -- how unconditional it is on Izuku’s part. that is some fiercely strong love there on his part that it can survive all the bullshit Kacchan heaps onto it, and all his best attempts to snuff it out. he just latched on and wouldn’t let go. anyways it resulted in something extremely unhealthy for quite a while, but it’s turning around now and being reciprocated, even if Kacchan’s version is prickly and tentative. don’t get ahead of me/could we just this once see eye to eye?

Ordinary Love (U2) - I can’t fight you anymore/it’s you I’m fighting for/the sea throws rocks together/but time leaves us polished stones. I fucking love that metaphor, though. yeah, just give them time. they’re gonna figure this all out one day.

and have a bonus theme song for class 1-A in general before we move on

Charlie Brown (Coldplay) - something about this song just embodies that restive, fidgety energy of youth to me. all the boys, all the girls/all that matters in the world/all the boys, all the girls/all the madness that occurs/all the highs, all the lows/as the room a-spinning goes/we’ll run riot/we’ll be glowing in the dark. there’s like a disorderly, disheveled beauty to this. say what you will about Coldplay, but some of their songs are like the musical equivalent of a rainbow.

anyways so now I’m gonna segue into some songs for a few of the season 4 characters. starting with...

Nighteye - While I’m Still Here (Nine Inch Nails) - ticking time is running out/yesterday I found out the world was ending. I still can’t get over how psychologically devastating Nighteye’s quirk is. it’s basically just Major Bummer: The Quirk. this season is really going to fuck me up emotionally isn’t it. a little more/every day/falls apart and/slips away/I don’t mind/I’m okay/wish it didn’t have to end this way. fucking hell. guess I better brace myself for some solid gut punches to the soul.

Eri - Rabbit Heart (Raise It Up) (Florence + the Machine) - nothing to see here, just a little girl being treated as nothing more than a human bloodbank, and told that her quirk is nothing but a curse even as her abuser hoards it and uses it to wage a war. this is a gift, it comes with a price/who is the lamb and who is the knife?/Midas is king and he holds me so tight/and turns me to gold in the sunlight. but I also picked this song for Eri because of the way the POV slowly gathers up their courage and tries to fight back. I wish that I could just be brave/I must become a lion-hearted girl/ready for a fight/before I make the final sacrifice. excuse me I need to go hug Eri.

Mirio - Carry On (fun.) - okay so it was kind of hard to pick a song for Mirio, I think maybe I was overthinking it. anyways I ended up going with something hopeful to try and embody his endless, determined optimism. this song has kind of a quiet courage that builds up as it goes on. my favorite part is the second bridge: cause we are/we are shining stars/we are invincible/we are who we are/on our darkest day/when we’re miles away/so we’ll come/we will find our way home.

bonus: Mirio and Tamaki - Kids (Acoustic) (OneRepublic) - back when we were kids/swore we would never die/you and me were kids/swear that we’ll never die. lol at least we have one healthy childhood friendship to stan in this series.

and now on to THE VILLAINS, yay. this is probably the most musically cohesive section of this playlist, since VILLAINS!! means I can go with an overall darker ambiance.

All for One - Sympathy for the Devil (Neptunes Remix) (Rolling Stones) - didn’t even have to think about this one. please allow me to introduce myself/I’m a man of wealth and taste/I’ve been around for a long, long year/stole many a man’s soul and faith. this is the gentleman villain song and a perfect fit IMO.

Tomura - Pet (A Perfect Circle) - or really, this is more “AFO and Tenko”, I guess. manipulating a traumatized child into hating the world and raising him to become a killer. pay no mind to what other voices say/they don’t care about you like I do/safe from pain and truth and choice and other poison devils/see, they don’t give a fuck about you like I do/just stay with me/safe and ignorant. this is one of those songs where literally the entire song fits both lyrically and musically. just perfect. I’ll be the one to protect you from your enemies and your choices, son/they’re one and the same/I must isolate you/isolate and save you from yourself. like it’s a struggle here not to quote the entire song. ...eh, one more. swinging to the rhythm of the new world order and/counting bodies like sheep to the rhythm of the war drums.

bonus: Flesh and Bone (Black Math) - Tenko angst. god that last arc was so fucking good. I walk alone, beside myself/nowhere to go/this bleeding heart that’s in my hands/I fell apart. stupid manga with its darkly compelling villain character arcs.

Dabi - Shadow on the Sun (Audioslave) - aaaangst lol. and I can tell you why/people go insane/I can show you how/you could do the same. p.s. Dabi you still owe me a flashback! also “shadow on the sun” is a pretty good metaphor for his relationship with Endeavor. fire quirks make for such great metaphor potential.

Toga - Bones (MS MR) - you know I really have no idea why this song pings me so hard for Toga lol. but whatever, it is what it is. marinate in misery/like a girl of only 17/man-made madness/and the romance of sadness.

Twice - Misfits (Third Eye Blind) - my people are the misfits/the ones that don’t fit in. this is another song that clicked pretty naturally without requiring much thought on my part. well those are the ones for me/yeah those are the ones for me/the misfits, the freaks, the enemy/you and me.

Spinner - Normal Person (Arcade Fire) - is anything as strange as a normal person?/is anyone as cruel as a normal person/waiting after school for you/they want to know if you/if you’re normal too/well are you? this song is such a burn on quirk society and all of its issues. I can’t tell if I’m a normal person, it’s true/I think I’m cool enough/but am I cruel enough? I especially love the ending -- if that’s what’s normal now/I don’t want to know.

and a bonus League of Villains song:

Everybody Wants to Rule the World (Tears for Fears cover) (Lorde) - just change “rule” to “destroy” I guess lol. help me make the most of freedom/and of pleasure/nothing ever lasts forever/everybody wants to rule the world. god I love this cover. this is one of those songs I’ll play over and over again anyway so it’s nice to have a good excuse what with the direction this new arc appears to be headed in.

and lastly, a couple of Hawks and Endeavor songs because they don’t really fit in any other section and I didn’t really plan out this post!

Hawks - Weapon (Matthew Good) - just a really nice, angsty theme for the man who goes too fast, off on his spy mission of doom. careful, you be careful/this is where the world drops off. plus some bonus angst about how he’s trapped in this role that he never wanted to be in. and you give in/and you give out for it/ain’t it so weird/how it makes you a weapon.

Endeavor - Find My Way (Nine Inch Nails) - lord my path has gone astray/I’m just trying to find my way/wandered here from far away/I’m just trying to find my way/you were never meant to see/all those things inside of me/now that you have gone away/I’m just trying to find my way. I don’t really need to comment more on this, do I? also, the part where Trent Reznor’s voice drops to a whisper and says please/I never meant for this, though. omg. Endeavor you’re such a bitch and you had all of this coming, but even so. oof.

and that’s pretty much it! she said, like this post wasn’t long af as it is lol. anyway so there are... 34 songs here, lol. I should probably try and put it all into a youtube playlist or something for convenience. I’ll edit once I’ve done that.

edit: playlist!

#bnha #boku no hero academia #class 1-a #bakudeku #league of villains #fanmix #bnha fanmix #bnha meta #bnha spoilers #mha spoilers #makeste reads bnha

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faneliacosplay · 5 years

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Top 10 of 2018

C2018 was a year is this nicest way I can sum it up. My precious fur-baby passed away after fighting a horrible illness and is in a happier place, my health went crazy (still is as of writing), and I finally broke free from an abusive toxic person who had been controlling me for a huge chunk of my life. Despite the bad things that happened, I want to focus on the good things of 2018. One of things I began doing in January of 2018 was at the end of every week, I would write down all of the good things that happened to me, be it sewing, watched a good movie, spending time with a friend, etc. So without further ado, here’s my Top 10 of 2018! (I CAN’T BELIEVE IT’S ALREADY MARCH!!)

1. The Ancient Magus’ Bride

- I’ve been a lifelong fan of Beauty and the Beast-like stories ever since I watched the classic Disney film. The manga kept popping up in my recommendations for the majority of 2017 and I remember seeing a poster at my local theater for a premiere showing of the first 3 episodes of the then-upcoming anime (I have since regretted not going to this showing). I finally caved and bought the first two volumes of the manga and literally went back to the store two days later and bought the next 2 volumes. I’ve always been a very picky person with my romance be it movie, novel, anime, manga, etc., but this quickly became one of my favorites with it’s excellent world-building, relationships, and don’t even get me started on how gorgeous the animation is! If you want an excellent Beauty & the Beast adaptation, you won’t be disappointed. (I am unashamed of crying happy tears in public while watching the final episode)

2. Satoshi Kon’s Filmography

- My New Year’s resolution was to watch all of the late Satoshi Kon’s works, starting with his debut film Perfect Blue. I had wanted to watch this film for several years, and it did not disappoint. (I kept spamming for people to go and see it when it got a theatrical re-release in Fall 2018) Next was Kon’s final project Paprika, which I watched about 3 times in May and many times over 2018 and still notice something new every time I watch it. Finally, I watched *the* film that I have wanted to watch for many, many years (since 2004 to be exact): Millennium Actress. I was not prepared for how moving this film would be with its themes of the past vs. present, how an ordinary encounter can lead to something so much more, and lastly: love transcends time. If you could only watch one of Satoshi Kon’s works, please choose to watch Millennium Actress. Unfortunately, I wasn’t able to watch Kon’s other two works, but I aim to in 2019 (along with reading his works)

3. Slayers

- I watched some of Slayers back in middle school and in summer 2016, but never took off with it until in 2018. I knew I would like this funny series about the adventures of a fiery sorceress, dumb as a stump swordsman, optimistic hero-in-training, and an overly-serious chimera, but I had no idea it would become one of my top 10 favorite anime series! I haven’t laughed so much with an anime in a while, and I greatly appreciated it since my fur-baby passed away and this was one of the last anime we watched together. There’s just something about 90s fantasy anime that’s just so appealing. I will throw in that while I love the tv series, the films are worth watching too, with The Motion Picture being my favorite. If you need something to cheer you up, I highly recommend Slayers!

4. Venom

- Confession: I did not have high hopes for this movie. I was the only one among my friends who was uninterested in this film whenever we would watch the trailers/promos/etc. Eventually after this movie came out, my friends and best friend convinced me to see it. My sociology buddy told me “This movie wasn’t marketed right! Go see it!!” and another told me “This is the best action rom-com of 2018.” The next day my family asked me if I wanted to see it and Bohemian Rhapsody (also an excellent film) and I said “Sure!” This film has since spawned never-ending jokes between me and my best friend. (I ended up making her a Venom scarf for Christmas!) If you’re trying to get someone to see this film, don’t show them the trailers depicting it as a dark, gritty, action thriller, show them the home video trailer depicting it as a rom-com because that’s exactly what it is. I still can’t believe that a movie about a human falling in love with a man-eating gooey alien is real.

5. The Shape of Water

- “2017 will be remembered as the year men screwed up so badly, women started dating fish.”- Jimmy Kimmel, 2018 Oscars. I’m beginning to see a pattern for stories of humans falling in love with monsters. My mom and I wanted to see this film after the trailer dropped in summer 2017 and were disappointed when the film didn’t play here. However, sometime in February 2018, this film played in our town for one weekend, so we dashed to the theater. I don’t even know where to start with how beautiful this film is and since several people I know still haven’t watched it I’ll just state this: Please watch this film. It earned the 4 Oscars it won. (It earned all 10 it was nominated for!)

6. Spider-Man: Into the Spider-verse

- I almost didn’t see this film. 2018 was a pretty hectic year for me and I didn’t really keep up with films/entertainment news, so I saw no trailers for this film (except for a really short tv ad). All I knew was what my best friend had said: “Brianna, let’s go see Spider-verse. In 3D.” (y’all, 2018 was the year of listening to my best friend) It was so nice not only to see a different Spider-Man, a diverse cast, a well-curated soundtrack, and a completely new style of animation that makes you feel as though you’re reading/watching a comic book??? Sign me up! I’m so happy this film won the Oscar!!

7. Macross Frontier Movies

- I’ve fallen deep into the Macross hole in the past year or two and have no plans of crawling out. The 2008 series Macross Frontier was my first and favorite entry in the series so far. I knew that there were two recap/alternate retelling films made, so when I was free one day I watched them and I was really surprised that I enjoyed them more than the tv series!? I haven’t really mentioned this, but my big problem with the tv series of Frontier was it’s ending being not too good. I don’t want to ruin it since Macross (particularly made after 2001) is a bit unknown in the USA, but I will say that if you want to get into this franchise, start with the Frontier movies or with the iconic Macross: Do you remember love? film. The music is just as good as the tv series, same with the costumes, and the writing is much better! The performance of Northern Cross at the climax of The Wings of Goodbye was really moving. Not “Do you remember love?” moving, but pretty close.

8. Sailor Moon Theatrical Double-Feature

- Everyone who knows me knows that I’ve loved Sailor Moon for pretty much all of my life (ever since the 3rd & 4th seasons aired on Toonami back in the day!) A holiday tradition for me was to watch the 2nd theatrical every Christmas Eve, unfortunately my two VHS tapes finally gave out in 2016. Thanks to Viz Media, this past summer saw theatrical re-releases of all 3 Sailor Moon films. Shockingly, my local theater was showing the films subbed so my mom and I bought our tickets right away. It was so surreal seeing these films that I grew up with on the big screen, and I know non-Sailor Moon fans won’t get this, but hearing/watching the whole “Moon Revenge” sequence in the theater was so intense. This part never got to me as a kid for some weird reason and I had no idea I was crying until my mom pointed it out at the end of the film. With the 2nd film, seeing Luna transform into a human was emotionally moving as always, just 10 times more since it was on the big screen with that nice surround sound system. That night when I got home, I didn’t get any sleep since I still couldn’t believe that this happened. The now 20+ years old Sailor Moon movies got released for the first time in USA theaters. This is an experience I’m going to remember for the rest of my life.

9. Cardcaptor Sakura: Clear Card Arc

- I was so excited when a sequel to Cardcaptor Sakura was announced. Like Sailor Moon, I watched this series as the heavily-edited Cardcaptors on Toonami. When I got older and learned that there was more anime out there besides the ones I saw on TV, I went back and watched Cardcaptor Sakura to get the whole, magical story and even read the manga, which I believe is the greatest children’s manga ever made. I loved every single moment of the new series and felt as though I were watching another episode of the classic series. The only thing that felt different was that the animation is no longer hand-drawn. (it’s still good) When you reboot or make a sequel to a series be it tv, film, or book, sometimes it’ll miss the charm that made it so enjoyable in the first place. Clear Card thankfully still carries the charm its predecessor had.

10. Little Witch Academia

- I had started this anime around holiday 2017 but didn’t finish it until early 2018. This was one of the most optimistic series I’d ever had the pleasure of watching. I don’t want to compare the two, but the inspirational message that Kiki’s Delivery Service gave me when I was 10, was the exact inspirational message you will find in Little Witch Academia. (and that I needed to hear as a 20-year-old) I was starting to get a bit depressed and losing confidence in myself with my science grades getting lower no matter what I tried, as well as other things in my personal life. After dropping Science, I had a long wait between classes, so I decided to start watching Little Witch Academia again. Seeing our protagonist Akko trying her best at flying a broom and failing was me with my science grades, but her determination to get her broom just a few centimeters off the ground was so inspiring to watch. After this I watched the other Studio Trigger works I had yet to see, and while they’re all good in their own way, none of them have left the imprint LWA left on me. Sometimes when I get frustrated or lack confidence in myself, I tell myself Shiny Chariot’s words of wisdom that motivated Akko throughout the series: “Never forget your beautiful dreams. Believing is your magic!!”

#2018 #2018 in review #The Ancient Magus Bride #millennium actress #satoshi kon #slayers anime #lina inverse #venom #the shape of water #into the spider verse #macross frontier #sailor moon #cardcaptor sakura clear card #clear card arc #little witch academia #brianna talks #slayers

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diredigression · 4 years

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Abernathy Farm

The next installment in Sole’s post-frozen-dinner adventures!

You may notice I’ve changed tense and also some other dialectical details to better match the voice in Sole’s head. I'm also attempting to write Sole with PTSD, but I don't have actual experience with it so CC welcome!

CW: some violence, some PTSD

————————————————

The next day, all sign of the barely-sentient body that she had spoonfed for days is gone. Mr.. Garvey is once again the confident, in-charge Minuteman she met in Concord. “Sturges, great job on the construction! This place is practically draft-proof. And you’ve even got gardens and a water supply? Always knew I could count on you.”

Mr. Sturges hides a slight blush under a wide grin. “This place is really coming together, huh? I can’t take all the credit, though. Sole and Codsworth have really put the interior and garden together, not to mention taking over all the cooking duties!”

Mr. Garvey turns to her. “Thank you, Sole. I can’t say how lucky we are to have you with us.”

She smiles and bows her head delicately at the acknowledgment. “Just doing my part, Mr. Garvey. But, if I may, why did you call me Sole?”

He laughs, a belly-deep sound of delight. She recognizes this, logically, though her brain doesn’t connect with an echoing joy. “No need for ‘Mister Garvey’ here. Hell, you just saved us from a deathclaw and fed me for days. I think that puts us on first-name basis.” His tone suddenly switches to somber and hesitant. “He called you ‘Sole’ because that’s all you gave us instead of a name…You just said ‘I’m the sole survivor.’ What is your name? …Do you know it?”

I’m the sole survivor. She distantly feels a pressure in her chest, like the unease of far-off thunder. Name. She has a name, right? She fights to bring her mind back to the present question, racking her memories, but all she can reliably bring up is the past few days of work. And flashes of scenes, more feeling than picture. The desolation of her first view of the waste, from the top of the vault. The clinical unfamiliarity of the vault suit she still wears.

The vault of death.

Invisible chains suddenly bind her chest and she finds herself collapsing to the ground. Both men rush to her side, but her arm flails to swat them away as she buries her face in her knees and curls around herself as tightly as she can. She freezes there, unaware of the men watching or the passage of time, until the panic finally begins to ease its grip.

She raises her head, muscles still tense, and finds herself looking into the two men’s concerned faces.

“Sole? You okay?”

Her eyes drop. She breathes. Out, in. Out, in. Until she knows her panic is locked away again.

Then she plasters a carefree smile on her face and begins struggling to push herself upright. Mr. Garvey offers a hand, which she accepts.

“I’m so sorry about that, I’m perfectly alright. Just a little lightheaded. Yes, please, just call me Sole. I’m afraid I’ll need to rest for some time, but I’ll see you gentlemen for dinner, yes?”

The concern stiffens on Mr. Sturges’ face and deepens on Mr. Garvey’s. The two men look at each other.

“Very well,” says Mr. Garvey. “Sleep well, Sole.

———

After breakfast the next morning, Mr. Garvey begins filling a pair of packs. Mr. Sturges raises an eyebrow.

“Where we headed?”

Mr. Garvey frowns at the small pile of goods in front of him. “I think I heard of a settlement just west of us. We’ve made a really good start here, but we’re running out of supplies. I figure we go see if they have anything they can spare.”

Mr. Sturges nods. “I could use some materials for crafting too.”

Sole listens to their conversation from the kitchen, where she washes breakfast dishes in a bucket of water. More survivors nearby?

“Hey Sole, you met the neighbors yet?”

She starts. “Nossir, I haven’t.”

“Wanna join the welcome party?”

“I’ll come along if you’d like.”

“It’s a party then!”

Sole helps pack some food for the trip. Pretty soon they’re ready to go. As they pull on their packs, a round silver robot floats into the room.

“Mum? May I have a moment?”

“Of course, Codsworth. What is it?”

The robot lifts two of his long, jointed arms towards her. In the end clamps is held a silver softball bat. It’s clean and shiny, but scratched, and the Red Rockettes logo is still faintly visible. The handle is wrapped in athletic tape that has greyed and lost its stickiness, beginning to unravel.

“Oh, Codsworth! My bat, you kept it ready for me!”

“Of course, mum, I know how important your softball is to you. I’d hoped you’d have a chance to use it again.”

She takes the bat and automatically shifts into a casual batting stance. The weight of the aluminum is familiar in her hands, and a smile appears on her face as she takes a careful practice swing.

“Nice swatter you’ve got!” says Mr. Garvey. “That’ll be a good weapon for you, since you didn’t seem too comfortable with guns.”

Her joy turns to disgust and she clutches the bat to her chest, forgetting her manners. “What?! No, this is for softball! This isn’t a weapon!”

“Haha, what? I don’t know what vault you came from, but no one’s played softball or baseball in two hundred years. Surprised they didn’t mention it. Weapon’s all it’s good for now. I bet Sturges could mod it for you to make it more effective.”

There’s a lot to unpack in his statement, but Sole chooses to focus on the simplest part. The rest gets locked away. The rest, for now, doesn’t exist. “No, Mr. Sturges is not touching my bat. Codsworth, thank you, now please take this back and keep it safe for me for now.”

“Yes, mum.”

Mr. Garvey frowns. The bat safely out of harm’s reach again, Sole has lost her bravery and feels a familiar fear and shame begin to knot in her stomach at the sight. Dammit, she’s spoken out too bluntly. She’s hesitant and worried now. “What is it, Mr. Garvey?”

“…It’s just Preston, and I just want you to have a weapon. You need to be able to defend yourself. You know that, right?”

She does not, and she doesn’t know how to respond either. She folds her hands together in front of her and looks at the floor.

“Okay…do you know how to fight with a knife?” A head shake no. “A 10 mil?” No. “…knuckles? Can you punch?” No.

He sighs. “Even Diamond City residents are better prepared than this. Okay. Do you think you could swing a crowbar?”

She has nothing else to do, so she nods.

“Good. Sturges should have one lying around, and I’ve got some spare armor we can at least put you in. I’m not letting you go around unprotected.”

She allows herself to be dressed in the bulky leather armor. Soon she’s following Mr. Garvey out of Sanctuary, the heavy crowbar hanging awkwardly from her hand.

—————

Sole is harvesting melons, young miss Lucy Abernathy’s request in exchange for a few stims and some other supplies Mr. Garvey had requested, when she overhears him and the family patriarch talking in low tones.

“Most of them died. They gave their lives to protect the Commonwealth. It’s just me now.”

“That’s a damn shame. Those were brave men and women. If y’all had been here when those raiders hit, my daughter Mary might still be alive. Then again…feels like we’ve been on our own for a long time anyway.”

“Damn…I’m sorry to hear that. I wish we could’ve helped. You have my condolences. Is there anything we could do to help now?”

Mr. Abernathy had been despondent, hanging in the air as if the only thing keeping him upright was an invisible string at the nape of his neck. At first he just shrugs, head drooping and swaying gently. Then he pauses, then straightens slightly.

“I don’t have much to offer, but…Those raiders that killed Mary, they took her locket, too. It’s been in Connie’s family for generations. If you could get it back…it’d mean a lot to us.”

Mr. Garvey straightens his hat proudly. “I’d be honored to. You have my word as a Minuteman, I will do everything in my power to return that locket to you and Connie.”

Mr. Abernathy nods, a specter of a smile finally appearing on his face. You might be the one to make me believe the word of a Minuteman again. Thank you, Garvey.”

They shake hands and part. Sole gathers up the melons and heads towards the ramshackle house.

—————

They crouch behind a barbed-wire fence, watching the forested, still remains of USAF Satellite Station Olivia. Mr. Garvey watches the station from her left, while Codsworth hovers at her right, his thruster humming in the quiet. She’s not sure why she’s here or still armored or why Mr. Garvey is suddenly so cautious. He had just assumed she would join, so she did. They had stopped briefly at Sanctuary to reorganize their new supplies, talked briefly with Mr. Sturges, who had chosen to stay behind, and also talked with Codsworth, who had insisted on coming with Sole. Mr. Garvey’s laser musket is in his hands, while Codsworth’s three eyestalks scan the surroundings fretfully. Sole grips her crowbar tighter as their tension fills her.

Mr. Garvey turns to her. “The place looks empty, maybe they’re out somewhere else, but we can’t be sure,” he whispers. “We’re gonna try to just get in, find the locket, and get out. No heroics, no unnecessary risk. Stay well behind Codsworth and me and try to stay out of trouble. Got it?”

She’s not sure she gets much of anything. She nods anyway.

“Alright. Stay here for the moment until Codsworth and I give the all-clear.” He looks at the robot, who bobs an agreement. The two cross the fence and stalk towards the structures.

They’ve made it halfway when the ground erupts beneath them. A pack of malformed, dog-sized animals surrounds them, attacking. Sole screams, forgetting their attempts at subtlety. Mr. Garvey roars too, and the area lights up with his laser bolts and Codsworth’s flamethrower. The creatures’ screams are added to the din.

Then Mr. Garvey pauses and gestures wildly past the robot. “It’s mined!”

A massive explosion erupts. Sole is knocked backwards, and she scrambles to get her head under her hands. She huddles there where she’s landed, hiding under her hands, waiting for the next attack.

There’s only silence.

After several moments of frantic heartbeats, she summons the courage to turn and crawl back to the fence. The area in front of the station is now a dark blast zone, animal carcasses scattered around. She doesn’t look too closely at them. She releases a breath as she finds Mr. Garvey and Codsworth, singed but alive, picking themselves off the ground. Mr. Garvey rubs his ears, shakes his head vigorously, retrieves his musket, then looks towards her and gestures Come here. She crosses the fence and hesitantly picks her way forward, scanning for more of the creatures.

“Don’t worry, I think we got them all. You okay?”

“What on earth just happened? Are you okay? Codsworth?”

“These idiots apparently decided that strapping mines to a molerat was a good defense mechanism. It’s amazing they didn’t blow themselves up. We’ll have to keep an eye out for more traps inside.”

“Molerats? No. They don’t get that big. No. They must be…uh…”

Mr. Garvey frowns as she flounders, but Codsworth floats up and pats her shoulder with a claw, awkward and a little overly aggressive. “No worries, mum, they’re gone now. You don’t have to bother with them anymore.”

She stares at him, searching for confidence in the large glass eyes and finding enough to ease her panic slightly. “Alright. Um. I left the crowbar…” She runs back to grab it from where it dropped and returns. Mr. Garvey looks to the station door, breathes deeply, and opens it.

———————

The station is quiet. They make it to the bottom with no problems. They separate and begin searching the scattered toolboxes and desks for the locket.

“Hey, I found a key!” Mr. Garvey calls. “Think it opens that security door?”

It does, and he murmurs a small “Yes!” at the sight of the room and the supplies it contains. He quickly loops it, throwing the assorted weaponry into his pack. One item—is that a mini nuke?!—he cradles gently and wraps in a cloth before carefully stowing.

Then Codsworth’s aggressive shout from where he’d been stationed on guard in the hallway. “Hello! Fancy a bit of fist-a-cuffs, do we?”

Mr. Garvey whips around to Sole—”Stay here!”—grabs his musket and charges into the hallway. Sole freezes in a corner of the room. Yells come from the hallway.

A man charges into the room where Sole cowers. She notices the remarkably straight mohawk on his otherwise-bald head. She notices the cloth strips wrapping his arms and the armor pads on his legs and chest. She notices the knife in his hand. She notices the gaps in his teeth as he grins rabidly at her and shouts, “Come on, little girl! Let’s do this!”

Sole is frozen. The man dodges towards her, almost like a herding dog expecting a sheep to flee, but then realizes she’s not moving. His wild grin widens. “Too fuckin easy.” He moves closer.

The sound from the hallway fades as Sole’s world spirals down to the filthy face approaching her. Her breathing is rapid; his is heavy and gasping. He approaches until his face is right in hers. He raises the knife to her face. She can smell his rank breath and, separately, his rank body. He looms over her, and she manages to move just enough to stumble back, away from him, into a corner. He follows, never letting the distance increase. The sharp tip of the knife gently scrapes down her face. His eyes follow, and descend lower down her body, the grin never fading. “Ain’t you a pretty little thing.”

She can feel the crowbar in her hand, but she can’t manage to use it, even in the face of certain danger. His eyes return to her face. As he meets her eyes, she realizes that his are a startling light blue. They would be handsome, if he weren’t currently pressing a knife against her face. She realizes that he’s very young. Certainly much younger than she is. Just a boy, really. What is he doing here? What is he doing with a knife?

“Sorry, girly. It was fun while it lasted.” The boy’s grin turns to a snarl as he retracts the knife and then shoves it into her side.

————————

“Sole! Sole!”

“Mum!”

Her consciousness slowly returns to her body. Her arms are still flailing, and she stills them. Mr. Garvey rushes towards her and grabs her shoulders, pulling the crowbar from her limp hands.

“I’m so sorry we let him get through! There was a minigun…ah hell, you’re bleeding! Where are you hurt? Here, sit down…maybe not here…come over here…” He leads her to a chair, catching her when she takes a step and nearly falls. The stumble pulls her side, and she realizes it hurts. Mr. Garvey pulls off her armor and Codsworth digs through a pack. A blinding pain in her side; then, slowly, the pain is replaced by the itch of flesh stitching back together, beginning from deep under her ribcage.

Her eyes begin to clear. She watches Mr. Garvey replace the top on a bottle of alcohol. She glances over his shoulder.

The man—the boy—is there. He’s on the floor. His head has been replaced by a bloody pulp.

She leans over and vomits.

#fallout #fallout 4 #fo4 #fallout oc #dire's sole #fallout sole survivor #sole survivor #fallout preston #preston garvey #fallout sturges #sturges #fallout codsworth #codsworth #abernathy farm #fanfic #fallout fanfic

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wolfcrunch · 5 years

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Thoughts on Mirio Togata and a certain Quirk...

Y’all finally ready??? lets go

SPOILERS FOR ANYONE NOT HAVING READ THE OVERHAUL ARC

(also contains minor spoilers from other arcs? major at the very end for Overhaul arc)

time to,,,,, talk about why I, personally, don’t believe Mirio should be as deserving of OFA as everyone else thinks he is, why Sir Nighteye was in the wrong and everything about that.

Now I do want to,, say a few things first

yes, if you know me even a little bit you will know I am not the biggest fan of Mirio - he actually happens to be in my top 10 most disliked characters. HOWEVER I’m going to do my best to keep my thoughts neutral (to be fair, it was the fanbase that turned me off liking him)

the exact same thing goes for Sir Nighteye, but even worse - again, I won’t rag on him and I do understand why he acted the way he was, sorta

this post will honestly be a mess oof. but mostly I’m going to just dump all the thoughts I can; including how the timeline would change, characters personal feelings and such

THIS POST IS JUST MY OPINION THUS FAR! it might change when Season 4 of the anime airs, and I have extra time to go through the arc again. and of course, if you think Mirio does deserve OFA then thats perfectly fine too! everyone has their own opinions, I don’t expect this to change any minds.

Power-wise, Mirio is deserving - however, this is factoring his own quirk out of this

ALSO NOTE this post has no structure as I’ve said before so...oops?

Ok so to basically start this off; we see Mirio before he loses his quirk as a rather hardworking, bright and sunny student. And yes, first thoughts would be ‘he is the perfect choice’, and I see why people think so. His mastery of his own quirk is rather impressive; if anything, he might’ve been like All Might, able to master OFA much faster. Not to imagine how the quirk would mix with his own, and with future quirks.

But seeing the type of person Mirio is...someone who holds himself so proudly over how he controls his current quirk...I don’t think he would’ve accepted OFA to begin with. He’s already shown the instance of this in canon.

I understand the occurrence of this interaction wouldn’t be the same, but regardless it counts for how he might approach it all. He strikes me a lot like All Might; he’s already powerful enough with his quirk, he’s already got enough control - why would he need to accept this gift, regardless of the power it holds, or the sentiment?

He’s already standing in the ring.

Which also leads me to something All Might has said before, when confiding in Bakugou about why he chose Midoriya to be his successor of all people.

Again, I know the circumstances aren’t the exact same. But I feel like Mirio is the type of character who would prefer the quirk go to someone less fortunate, for he already has so much going for him.

Of course, I could be completely wrong. He might have accepted it, if for the sake of All Might and Sir Nighteye; but I would like to think he wouldn’t. Mirio also reminds me of Midoriya in that regard; caring for others over themselves.

This is also partially why I want to believe that Mirio wont get his quirk back. I feel like it would be so much better for his character to remain quirkless, and to become what Midoriya could’ve been if he had not gotten OFA. That would make his character arc really improve and be really good writing for him.

I’d also like to point out that whilst Mirio is very well much like All Might when it comes to personality and how he holds himself as a hero...one major thing brings them apart, this major part being something Midoriya excels in, and we’ve seen this is various instances.

Mirio...is hesitant.

He was hesitant when it came to their first meeting with Eri. Yes, he is a seasoned student, and knowing how dangerous Overhaul was - it was for the best that they let Eri go.

But you can’t always hesistate. Sometimes you have to jump in...and I feel like Mirio doesn’t have that drive, not like All Might and Midoriya. It was this exact same trait that caused All Might to choose. Midoriya leaped in to save Bakugou, consequences be dammed. I don’t think Mirio could do that.

And now...Sir Nighteye.

My distaste for Sir Nighteye is unique - and it might mostly stem from the fact that I am a Midoriya stan.

Now, I do understand why he was firstly portrayed as he was - bitter towards our protagonist. His character is a rather complex one; he starts off as a rude man but eventually we see why and how he came to be that way, and what shaped him - All Might’s future.

Anyone being faced with the death of the Symbol of Peace, the strongest hero, and having no way to change it would be unnerved. Sir Nighteye was scared, and his reaction is justified...in a way, considering he worked with All Might himself. The two were work partners, and it was this uncertain future that split them apart.

Sir Nighteye had every reason to grow apart from All Might, he only wanted to try protecting him. Being one of the only heroes who knew about One For All, he also wanted to make sure it was passed to the right successor, which is understandable.

But Sir Nighteye, I feel, approached the situation in the wrong way. We see that very clearly when Midoriya has to fight him in order to be accepted as his intern.

This scene just...rubs me the wrong way when it came to Sir Nighteye’s character. There were plenty of other ways he could’ve tried to deal with this.

He doesn’t have to accept Midoriya, no, but he should’ve put his bitter resentment aside. He only knows Midoriya as the kid who breaks his bones with his quirk. He doesn’t know how much Midoriya had to fight to control this quirk - and even then, he still can’t control it.

But also Midoriya’s expression when he finds out Mirio was ‘first in line’;

Midoriya still likely suffers from something akin to Impostor’s Syndrome - again, various hints have been placed throughout the manga/series itself. That’s not surprising.

Sir Nighteye’s dismissal of him wielding OFA was awful.

Sir Nighteye shouldn’t have a choice in the first place. That’s also what annoys me.

OFA is not his quirk...I don’t understand why he went and trained a successor for a quirk he can’t pass, for a quirk that isn’t his to decide. All Might isn’t the best teacher...but Sir Nighteye didn’t trust him, obviously. He didn’t trust the Symbol of Peace to be competent enough to find someone worthy.

That ‘someone worthy’ ended out being Midoriya. But Sir Nighteye still blatantly went ahead with this ‘great idea’.

Sir Nighteye as a character does improve - by the end of the Overhaul Arc, we know he has come to terms with Midoriya - has spoken about him, ect. But the fact he gets killed off right after still left the sour taste in my mouth of his first introduction.

Not to mention his quirk; I understand that Sir Nighteye was frightened by All Might’s death, but doesn’t his quirk allow him to show the future? They could’ve looked to see who All Might chose; and they could’ve risen that successor together.

All the hardship and bitterness could’ve easily been avoided.

And now, y’all, lets go through the current canon events and dissect how everything would’ve turned out if Mirio had gotten OFA instead;

(leaving off from the standpoint where Midoriya still saved Bakugou from the sludge villain, but was never offered OFA)

The Entrance Exam: Uraraka possibly would’ve been seriously worse off than in canon. We don’t know if the teachers would’ve stopped the robot in time for nothing serious to occur - since no one would be there to punch the robot.

Quirk Assessment Test: not terribly bad, but a student possibly would’ve been expelled - even several.

USJ: At the very least, Tsu and Mineta would be dead. Aizawa and All Might would also possibly be dead, and perhaps even other students. The League would’ve been much more successful, and the media would be even more down UA’s throats.

Sports Festival: Todoroki maybe wouldn’t have indulged to anyone about his backstory; he would’ve gone on to use only his ice. I don’t believe many of the other students who he’d consider ‘strong enough’ would try to encourage him like Midoriya did during their battle. It’d also be safe to say that because of this, he wouldn’t visit his mother afterwards.

Hero Killer: Stain: Due to Midoriya not interning with Gran Torino, and seeing as the events with Tensei would still occur, Tenya would still go after the villain with revenge. It’d likely that both he and Native would die by Stain since there is no Midoriya or Todoroki to intervene.

Final Exams: Nothing too terrible happens here - but its likely that Bakugou would be off worse.

Training Camp: Bakugou and Todoroki, perhaps even more students would’ve been kidnapped by the League. Kouta likely would’ve been killed by Muscular, and still would’ve hated heroes.

Kamino Ward: AFO vs All Might still occurs - but the outcome very well could’ve ended differently. The League might’ve gotten away with the students they kidnapped, and All Might might lose due to the fact he was holding back due to Bakugou in canon.

Provisional License Exam: Again, not that bad - some of the students might’ve not passed alongside Bakugou and Todoroki. If Toga still sneaks in, she either would’ve gotten no blood or the blood of someone else.

Overhaul/Internship Arc: Very possibly Eri might’ve never been saved. The prophecy with All Might not be twisted. Sir Nighteye still might die...and Mirio could’ve still, very likely, gotten shot. Where does that leave him? Probably without both his original quirk and One For All. The villains would win.

And that’s only if UA still remained open after earlier events. UA would be at the very real possibility of closing after the events of the USJ, allowing at least two students and possibly one or two teachers to die.

Midoriya, as a character, has made such an impact that the storyline would be vastly different. Several characters changed for the better because of his presence in the storyline with OFA. So many characters had the real chance of being badly hurt or killed if Midoriya hadn’t interfered in some way, shape or form.

He can’t interfere if he doesn’t have OFA.

Midoriya possess more of a hero’s ideals than Mirio when it comes to several,,, things in general. Mirio doesn’t really possess what Midoriya does, and would almost feel like an All Might copy.

Midoriya is truly working to make this quirk his own...Mirio would’ve had a better time, but we never would’ve seen the struggle our lovely green protagonist went through. The pain, the blood, the tears...Mirio wouldn’t have that - at least, not to the same extent.

And that is why Mirio doesn’t suit being the MC, or being the holder of OFA.

#bnha #mha #boku no hero academia #my hero academia #mirio togata #sir nighteye #all might #midoriya izuku #one for all #meta?#my thoughts are a mess sorry if this post isnt easy to read #lemillion #big three #queue

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