#But let’s be realistic

[i-was-mislead]

I say I don’t care about sports (and I don’t) but I’m very busy being emotional about sports so I think I might reread some sport fics again so I can pretend I’m being emotional about fictional characters instead of real people

#yeah I should probably write that Tour de France au that’s been in my head for a year #But let’s be realistic #it’s not like I’ve finished writing anything else either #me posting a fic that takes place in 2022 when it’s 2028: #But uh was anyone like? Interested in that? #or is it too niche? #I swear no one in America knows what I’m talking about

[undertheredhood]

the rest of the justice league: hey man, we get that he’s your son and all, but shouldn’t you do something about him?

bruce ‘that’s my precious baby boy’ wayne: i’m sorry, did you have to hold your son as he was dying in your arms? did you almost k*ll yourself trying to follow him to the afterlife? i don’t think so.

#dc comics #dc universe #dcu #justice league #batman #bruce wayne #bruce thomas wayne #red hood #jason todd #jason peter todd #batfamily #batfam #jason was never the angry robin #wfa bruce does this all the time #bruce at anytime: did you lose your child and couldn’t do anything to stop it? when that happens then you can tell me what to do about him #it’s not realistic but i think it would be hilarious if bruce just let jason get away with anything after he comes back

[bophamet]

actually i think sony should take their sweet fucking time with beyond the spiderverse cuz even with the time they took with atsv it wasn't enough for the animators to have proper working conditions. like take ten years i don't fucking care, people can bitch and moan but i would rather know the employees aren't working 8hours a day plus overtime for 7 days a fucking week to get a movie about spiderman done cuz "waah waaaah i wanna see it" people won't shut up and sony demands their film be made for the profit of it all

#like cmon guys let's like. be patient and realistic shall we #there are 919295992@5 things to watch read listen to etc in the mean time #i think you can handle it taking a while. it's probably gonna take like. at least 4-5 years #at LEAST #so buckle up!!! #you want something to be good??? #you gotta wait #across the spiderverse #spiderman atsv #spiderverse

[homosexualanarchy]

tumblr the second the clock hits midnight on december 24th

#let’s be realistic here #also the 23rd #ace attorney #phoenix wright #christmas #october speaks!

[starrystevie]

steve's desperate, okay?

he's officially running late for his first date with linda because he couldn't find his car keys and the shirt he wanted to wear just wasn't working so he had to grab something out of his hamper and throw it on blindly which then messed up his hair and he almost forgot to brush his teeth again but remembered as he opened the front door and-

he only realizes he forgot to put on cologne once he makes it halfway to her house and smells himself. the shirt from the hamper smells stale, not bad, just stale. and steve in his normal, non-rushed state wouldn't have noticed because his trusty calvin klein would have covered it up but today is apparently not a day for things to go right.

with a sigh of frustration, steve pulls into the hook's drugstore a little too quickly and it makes his stomach lurch the tiniest bit before sliding into an open parking sport at the front door. he rushes in, pushing the door open with too much force and books it to the fragrance aisle.

"this is so fucking stupid," he mutters to himself, unable to be heard by any surrounding shoppers over the annoyingly loud jingle playing through the speakers.

steve skids to halt in front of the cologne section, crouching down and scanning quickly over the tester bottles for obsession. once he spots the amber bottle, he yanks it towards himself, spraying as much as he can onto his chest given the awkward angle he's at. as he stands back up, steve pulls his shirt collar up towards his nose and the ball of nerves in his stomach loosens at the familiar smell. he may be late but he feels like he's back in the game.

checking his watch, he sees just how late he is and makes a beeline for the door, nearly running into an older lady with far too many rolls of toilet paper in her tiny arms. as he dodges around her and extends his arm to push open the door, he hears a loud voice over the intercom.

"you're not going to buy anything after stealing cologne?"

steve stops, freezes where he is and frantically turns his head around to spot the cashier grinning at him. he has long hair and a bright red hook's drugstore vest over a denim vest which doesn't look very comfortable. he has chains in his jeans and handcuffs holding his belt closed and a smirk that is trying to kill him and oh-

"wait, stealing cologne?" steve shakes himself back into existence as the old lady pushes by him without dropping a single roll on the way back to her car. "you're going to call me putting on a few sprays stealing?"

the cashier's smile just gets bigger, like a cat hunting down a canary. steve's never felt like a canary before but can't deny that it's an exciting feeling.

"well, on a good day i wouldn't. but i'm bored and you didn't buy a single thing so technically, yes. you're stealing, pretty boy."

steve fights the urge to roll his eyes and put his hands on his hips, so instead he crosses them over his chest, cologne wafting up from the movement and reminding him that he doesn't have time for this no matter how cute the cashier may be.

he makes his way over to the counter, grabs a pack of gum and slams it on the counter. without breaking eye contact with eddie, as his nametag suggests, he throws him a salty smile of his own and pulls his wallet out from his back pocket.

eddie's eyes are a deep brown with a glimmer of something behind them and his hands are covered in rings making his fingers look long and strong. the jeans he has on are ripped on one of the the thighs, showing a hint of a tattoo to match the ones crawling up his arms. steve's no stranger to thinking men are attractive but this guy? he's on a new level. his heart thumps painfully in his chest when eddie's grin grows larger as he watches steve give him a once over. it thumps even harder when eddie gives him a once over of his own.

the clock above the register shows that he's officially 20 minutes late to picking up... laura? lisa?

no, linda. damnit.

eddie looks down at the gum and then back up at steve, quirking up an eyebrow. "i hardly think this monetarily equates to a bottle of cologne but-"

"oh come on!" steve huffs. eddie laughs and it's clear and bright, ringing off the cinderblock walls louder than the annoying jingle that's still playing. whatever fight steve may have had left in him drains away at the sound and suddenly he isn't thinking about the clock anymore. he feels his shoulders fall down to a more relaxed state, feels himself shift his weight on his feet to look more natural than ready to run at a moments notice.

"just kidding, man." eddie rings up the gum quickly and hands it back to steve. "sorry, you looked like you were in a rush. i shouldn't have created a scene just because i'm bored."

steve chuckles. "i'm already supremely late for my date so what's another five minutes. especially if it gets me..." he looks at the gum packet to look at what he even picked up in the first place. "... spearmint freshen-up gum."

"well there you go," eddie says, grin smaller than before, "a perfect thing to get for a date. everyone likes their date to be minty fresh for that first kiss."

it strikes somewhere in steve that he isn't expecting. the beemer is still out in the parking lot running so he didn't have to waste time, his watch on his wrist feels heavy, the scent of obsession overpowering. but he can't make himself move. he wants to stay and talk to eddie, wants to learn about what makes him tick.

"can i borrow your phone?" steve asks. eddie's eyebrows furrow but he reaches for the store phone and places the console on top of the counter.

"for what?"

steve look through his wallet, finding the piece of paper with linda's number on it. holding the receiver between his shoulder and ear, he dials in her number and holds his pointer finger up at eddie, signaling that he'll need a second. steve then brings the finger to his lips and shushes with his cheek pulling up in a smirk. eddie's eyes zero in on the motion and it feels like steve's gone from being the canary back to the cat.

"linda? hey it's steve."

he watches as eddie mouths steve back at him and then nods to himself when he gets the confirmation that it is indeed his name. steve throws him a wink for good measure.

"i know i'm late and i'm really really sorry to cancel last minute but-. oh. yeah, sure. have a good time. okay bye li-."

on the other end of the line, linda slams down the phone without waiting for steve to finish talking and it makes him wince with how loud it is in his ear. he gives eddie a sheepish smile, all toothy and guilt-ridden, and gently puts the receiver back down.

"what was that?" eddie asks with a disbelieving look on his face. steve shrugs.

"she got tired of waiting so she already had another guy lined up to come pick her up."

eddie sucks in air through his teeth and mimes getting shot in the heart. it has steve laughing as he falls over on the counter, hair covering his face. he turns his head to peer up at steve through the curtain of curls, the one brown eye that's visible twinkling in the harsh overhead light.

"was it true love? are you just absolutely heartbroken?"

steve thinks about it for less than a second. watches how eddie curls back up one vertebrae at a time before placing his elbows on the counter and leaning over. watches how eddie's eyes flit between his own and his lips. watches how he focuses on the latter for a little while too long.

"why would i be heartbroken," steve starts. he's being too forward, too brash, but with eddie looking at him that way, he knows he can be. "when you'll probably be on break soon and can make it up to me? you know, for making me even more late and all."

eddie's grin grows wide again. "oh really?"

steve shrugs once more with a playful look of consideration on his face, resting on his elbows to match eddie on the counter. "yes, really. this is your payback for being bored and taking it out on me."

it's later when eddie's on break and steve hasn't left the drugstore in over an hour and they're sitting in his car with bowie playing through the speakers that eddie looks up at him with a look steve knows well.

"you do smell really good, y'know." his voice is softer than steve's heard it all day.

"so are you glad i came in to steal cologne?" steve leans closer over the center console to get into eddie's personal space. there's a hand curling over his bicep and pulling him even closer, their faces only centimeters apart.

"i guess i'll let it slide this time, thief."

and when they kiss for the first time, it tastes like the freshen-up gum they both had been nonstop chewing ever since steve paid for it.

#did drugstores back then have fragrance aisles let alone samplers? who's to say just go with it #inspired by me looking cute for work today and forgetting to put on my perfume and wondering if i should stop in to target on my way in #steddie #steddie drabble #steddie ficlet #steddie headcanon #steve harrington #eddie munson #my writing #steddie fic #is this realistic? absolutely not but ignore that for the blorbos sake #stranger things #stranger things fic

[heynhay]

merry Christmas klancers 🎅

#I did the whole happy holidays art and I was like yayyyy I’m done I did my Xmas art #but um everyone looked like they were having so much fun w Xmas klance doodles I had to get in #klance #Voltron #vld #art #my art #Keith kogane #Lance McClain #I scheduled this at 2am but now it’s out im no longer abt to pass out I can dissertate in the tags #anyway I think they’d both be pretty awful cooks #like realistically a klance cookie making situation would be like #both of them oversold their cookie making skills and ended up in a contest (hunks the judge) for who could make them best #but they’d both suck. burnt salty raw awful etc etc #and they’d be beefing so hard like they’d take it so seriously #but for the sake of me wanting to draw cute Xmas art #let’s just say Lance is the slightly less horrendous cook and can make some cookies #there is no world I can reconcile Keith with the kitchen #I just know that boy feeds off instant noodles and unseasoned jerky

[luminousstardust]

caduceus watching the kid he had to bring back from the dead 7 years ago from ONE hit trying to come with the nein:

#absolutely fucking insane. #sam reigel your mind goes crazy #realistically i know they have to let him come bc that’s sams character but also #no way in hell this kid should be allowed around TRENT FUCKING IKITHON #critical role #critical role spoilers #cr spoilers #mighty nein liveshow #mighty nein liveshow spoilers #the mighty nein #caduceus clay #luc brenatto #tay liveblogs

[the-satellite]

And you may ask yourself, HOW DID I GET HERE?

#cosmic entity's art #LETTING THE DAYS GO BY- ok enough #fnv #old world blues #scopophobia #just in case the eye is significantly more realistic than usuall #courier six

[sarangkstars]

Attack on Titan

#levi ackerman #my baby #ultimate fave #it was very difficult to visualize this man 'cause he's so damn fine #hope I did a good job #let me know #anime x realistic #my fanart #aot fanart #attack on titan

[theo-notts-doll]

i haven't had the time to watch percy jackson ep 7, and i hate how that means i cant go on any social media in fear of spoilers for a show based on a book series i've read like 50 times

#realistically #ik exactly what's going to happen #BUT STILL #percy jackson #percy series #percy jackon and the olympians #percy pjo #percy and annabeth #percabeth #smartwater #what even is that #it's percabeth you uncultured spaghetti hoops #but that one's cute #so we let the series watchers have it #grudgingly tho #reluctant even #annabeth chase #grover underwood #luke castellan #clarisse la rue #pjo tv show #pjo spoilers #pjo

[7clubs]

guys help i accidentally made my yjh design too fun to draw and self-indulgently bigender. don't mind me...

#orv #omniscient reader's viewpoint #yjh #yoo joonghyuk #yoohankim #yoohan #hsy #han sooyoung #kdj #kim dokja #yoo mia #jhw #jung heewon #lee jihye #ljh #yhk #im usually into stuff that isn't like. magic skillz fantasy so usually my chars have more realistic gender indulgence... #let me have this. teehee #doodle #sketch #oct 2023 #2023

[philonob]

Astarion Studies

#Baldur's gate 3 #bg3 #bg3 astarion #doodle #sketch #fan art #screaming crying throwing up I feel so awkward trying to implement characters from hyper realistic sources to my art style like #me @ astarion my babygirl let's give you some Long Ass Lashes

[kairospy]

I’m sorry but everyone at school wanted Regulus. He could’ve had anyone he wanted.

A Black? Rich? Quidditch star? Hot as shit?? The confidence from being told since birth you’re better than everyone else???

Yea this man could’ve snapped his fingers as have 17 people in his vicinity undressing

#if he wasn’t terrifying he would’ve been every students crush #when I say he had an ego I mean an Ego wit capital E #he just kept it to himself #he wasn’t loud about it yknow #but he knew he could have half the school on their knees with a look let’s be so honest #‘reg was so shy’ be realistic here for a sec. no Black is shy. they’re all egomaniacs who at some point saw themselves above everyone #james potter #starchaser #sunseeker #regulus black #regulus x james #jegulus #marauders #regulus black x james potter #dead gay wizards #slytherin skittles #regulus arcturus black #the marauders #james fleamont potter #the pantheon #bartylus #regulus and barty #regulus x barty #regulus headcanon #regulus black headcanons #regulus black hc

[moonswolfie]

You don't know exactly how it happened, but the entire K-POP community seems to ship you two together.

Did it start because you MC-d together last year? It was the first time the two of you appeared together.

You must admit, you had a lot of fun interacting with him. It felt like the two of you had a very good dynamic and you found yourself smiling a lot. The public must have thought so, too.

Under every instagram post you make, people tag him agressively. And the same applies for you. You've seen his every selfie through neverending tags.

You're also very aware of how your fans almost lose it whenever you post a dance challenge video with him. And he keeps inviting you or asks to be invited every time without fail. You find it very sweet and besides, it's a good opportunity to talk for a bit.

Your other group members tease you about it all the time, telling you to "just take him on a date already." Even the members of his group tease him about you sometimes, or so you've heard.

So, the entirety of K-POP is waiting for you to announce your relationship any second now.

You can only hope he feels the same way.

OIKAWAAAAA, Bokuto, Kuroo, SAKUSA, Atsumu, Suna

#˗ˏˋ ★ ☁︎ 「Wolfie's works」 ☾ ★ ˎˊ˗ #i know this isn't realistic and the fans would tear you to shreds but shhhh let me live my delulu #haikyuu!! #haikyuu #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu fluff #kpop au #haikyu x reader #x reader #oikawa tooru x reader #oikawa x reader #sakusa x reader #sakusa kiyoomi x reader #kuroo x reader #kuroo tetsuro x reader #miya atsumu x reader #atsumu x reader #suna x reader #suna rintarou x reader #bokuto x reader #bokuto koutarou x reader

[emry-stars-art]

You know when babies are so tired that they’re fussing too much to sleep until you put their head down on your shoulder or something and they pass out immediately

Baby shark has been swimming for a long time with no way to take a break. Hello Whalemack 🐋

(More on Whalemack here)

#whalemack was just swimming #wait what’s that floating up there #it’s coming closer falling through the water #oh there’s fins #and a body and arms and that’s a mer #so Wymack goes to check and it’s a baby shark that is MUCH too still #and he’s been around for a while he knows things #he knows baby shark mers aren’t supposed to be still #so he catches the baby in his arms and holds him so he can sleep #without waking up every minute needing to breathe #TT #and he continues taking care of Andrew whenever he finds the shark/Andrew lets him help #unrelated. realistically I know mammal mers would have short hair or their hair tied back #so it’s not IMMENSELY HEAVY #but I wanted to give Wymack gorgeous flowing locks #just once #as a treat #anyway #next post will be royal au or something else I promise #fan art #my art #aftg #all for the game #andrew minyard #david wymack #mer au #sharkdrew au #oops all mers au #sharkdrew #whalemack

[luxrayz64]

like we were so fucking robbed of seeing perez in the wake of saw vs events I want to see her getting out of the hospital and flipping tables and pointing a gun in ericksons face after being told that strahm is the lead suspect. I want to see her having a breakdown after strahms fingerprints come back dead. I want to see her hand twitching over her gun everytime she sees hoffman. I want to see her fucking losing it and desperate to avenge her friend and partner and to clear his name. I want to see the thought process that lead to her inviting known serial killer mark hoffman to the basement lab just so she could torture him psychologically before she had a legitimate excuse to shoot him. I want to see more of her and I want to see how strahms death impacted her the way the reverse impacted him.

#lindsey perez lindsey perezzzzz #we did not see nearly enough of her #she was so overshadowed by strahm in iv and then didnt even get to be a main character in vi #she showed up. psychologically tortured hoffman. and then she died (again). #realistically she's way better at hiding her insanity so I think she wouldn't lose it nearly as bad as strahm did #but I want just one little moment where she's on her own and she fucking loses it #forced to let your boss tell your best friend you're dead. he goes missing. is declared a suspect. turns up dead. no body to bury #more of her pov on these events please. please. please. #it would be so sanity inducing cause she KNEW it was hoffman. her last words to strahm was hoffmans name #and she knew him so well.... she must've known strahm went after him in the wake of her 'death'. the fucking guilt she must have felt #espeon cries #saw #i am so so sick in the head about her today